Tate Speech


CORONA MASK POLICE | Tate Confidential Ep. 87


Summary

In this episode, Rory and Rory talk about a mysterious virus that's been going around the world, and how it's ruining their lives. They also talk about how they own a bus, and why it's a good thing it's not a business class bus, because it means they have their own bus too. And they talk about Aikido, which is a Japanese martial arts training that involves jumping off of the top of a plane into the stratosphere, and jumping on the bus, which means they get to fly around in the middle of the night in business class, and then the bus breaks down, and they have to find a bus to take them back to the airport, but they don't have any money to pay for a bus ticket, so they need to get on a bus and get to work. This is the end of the world as we know it, and we're here to make you laugh about it. Enjoy the episode, and spread the word to your friends about what's going on in the world of the mysterious virus known as "Covid" and why they should be quarantined in a bus. xoxo, Rory, Andrew, and Rory. If you like conspiracy theories, then you'll love this episode. I'll be choosing a random winner at random in the next episode from the Take Confidential competition! xo Rory, Andrew, and Rory, I hope you like this episode - Tom and Rory Tom, Tom, and aikido - Tom, I love you so much, so don't forget about this. - Rory, so much that you don't care about this, so please leave us a comment and tell us what you think we should do this in the comments below. We love you. We'll be picking a winner next week. XOXOXO, Tom & Rory, and I'll do this next episode next week! - P.S. - Tom & Andrew, we'll see you next week, so you can help us out next week with the mystery prize, so we don't need to be perfect. Love ya! xo, Tom and Andrew, bye! xOXO. "Aikido" - Rory and Andrew XO - B. Tom and B. B. ( ) Thank you for all the love and support, Rory & B.B. (HAPPY THANKSGIVING!


Transcript

00:00:02.000 So where's Andrew?
00:00:03.000 And it's been held by the Romanian customs because we live here and we have European Union passports but we walked into the entrance hall normally covering our faces and Andrew had that fucking dingle with him Good song, Andrew Tate!
00:00:32.000 Stay confident, Andrew Tate!
00:00:36.000 On the way into the park, after 11 months to do my very, very best to fight and combat all this Covid bullshit I eventually had to take a Covid test Eventually. If you watch and take COVID test, you've seen all the stuff I've done.
00:00:57.000 I've never taken a COVID test. I'm wearing my mask now and Dubai can't fuck around.
00:01:00.000 I finally gave in. I did my COVID test.
00:01:02.000 I put a sticker On my passport.
00:01:04.000 See? Yep. I can scan the sticker, open this up, and I can put in my date of birth.
00:01:13.000 This is the first time I'm doing this to see if I have COVID. This is the first time I'm ever doing it.
00:01:18.000 Put in my date of birth. December 1996.
00:01:25.000 One second. 273.
00:01:33.000 My passport number. Search.
00:01:36.000 Boom. And we undertake.
00:01:38.000 Negative. Nice.
00:01:40.000 I do not have COVID. Man, we've been trying so hard.
00:01:43.000 Why can't we get this?
00:01:45.000 This mysterious virus.
00:01:46.000 We've been everywhere in the world breaking every rule.
00:01:50.000 Finish your beer. You're embarrassing us.
00:01:52.000 We'll finish. Finish your beer. What are you complaining about, Rory?
00:01:56.000 What the fuck? Let come up.
00:02:05.000 No! No! What's the emergency?
00:02:09.000 What's the emergency? We left chicken shit bullshit.
00:02:12.000 Oh, you think your mouth's gone, pussy.
00:02:14.000 No one cares about you. We've seen all of you.
00:02:16.000 Welcome to Disney Hands.
00:02:18.000 Look at Europe right now.
00:02:19.000 Who do you think started this?
00:02:21.000 Whose fault do you think this is?
00:02:24.000 I don't know. China.
00:02:26.000 Every rule. Never quarantine.
00:02:28.000 Never listening. Doing everything we're not supposed to do.
00:02:31.000 And I never, ever, ever, ever have come in.
00:02:34.000 Or, if I did have it, because I haven't been testing all the time, I haven't been testing.
00:02:38.000 If I did have it, I've never noticed once.
00:02:41.000 Yep. Clown world.
00:02:43.000 It is amazing, isn't it? The clown world that I must have had COVID at some point had absolutely zero symptoms.
00:02:49.000 Zero. There's something rolled down for this shit.
00:02:54.000 Scam. Scam.
00:02:56.000 Don't ban us, you two. But it's true.
00:02:59.000 So we're not shit munchers.
00:03:01.000 What's happening? Everyone's got on the bus and we're sitting down.
00:03:03.000 Why? We have our own bus.
00:03:11.000 A bus for three people.
00:03:14.000 It looks that way. It does look that way, doesn't it?
00:03:16.000 Did you ever hear about the first ever flight that had a business class on it?
00:03:20.000 It was a little pink plastic plane.
00:03:22.000 It was about this big. From 1942.
00:03:25.000 It was a pink plastic plane from Target.
00:03:27.000 And it flew. And you were on a business class.
00:03:30.000 And you got beaten up. I remember that.
00:03:32.000 Remember that story? I do. Oh, the business bus.
00:03:37.000 Watch out, let's get your hands off.
00:03:39.000 Yeah, remember the first time.
00:03:44.000 Look at that.
00:03:52.000 So we own a bus now.
00:03:53.000 Are there rupees? Are there rupees?
00:03:57.000 Yeah. Ah, so we are the boss man.
00:04:02.000 We are the boss man!
00:04:04.000 So we own the boss.
00:04:05.000 We own the boss. Boss training.
00:04:13.000 Boss training in Aikido.
00:04:17.000 Nobody likes us. Nobody likes us.
00:04:21.000 It's the ass boss.
00:04:25.000 Don't understand it the whole time, but I'm touching it in your limo.
00:04:27.000 Alright. So where are the buses at?
00:04:32.000 Bus like you. Bus?
00:04:34.000 Yeah, it's a bus like you.
00:04:37.000 It should be easy, right? It's only a bus.
00:04:39.000 It's my last bus. Here's only a bus.
00:04:43.000 This one. This is what everyone does in business class.
00:05:02.000 This must be a business class tradition.
00:05:04.000 It is. Right.
00:05:06.000 I want to start doing competitions for Take Confidential.
00:05:08.000 If you want to Take Confidential, I'm going to start giving money away.
00:05:11.000 Because I am a rich, generous philanthropist.
00:05:15.000 That's how people describe me.
00:05:17.000 The up post is generous philanthropic.
00:05:21.000 You might be the opposite of all of those words.
00:05:24.000 So, to qualify to win the mystery prize, you have to comment on this video.
00:05:31.000 It doesn't matter what you write. But if you watched this episode, comment below, and I'll be choosing a winner at random in the next episode.
00:05:39.000 From the bus night. Competition Aikido.
00:05:42.000 Competition Aikido.
00:05:44.000 That was...
00:05:46.000 I don't think it's ever been done before.
00:05:47.000 One leg. One leg.
00:05:51.000 I'm sass. If it turns, we're flawless.
00:06:01.000 Why does jumping help?
00:06:06.000 It does help. If you were to jump forever...
00:06:09.000 Little hops.
00:06:12.000 Let's do this.
00:06:15.000 They definitely look at us and wonder, how do these men hold this?
00:06:19.000 Alright.
00:06:25.000 Now to get tired.
00:06:29.000 It's false. He got us.
00:06:40.000 Andrew, what are you doing? Who are you?
00:06:45.000 The mask man. The van without a face.
00:06:49.000 They only wear a mask and I can be faceless like you though.
00:06:52.000 Man with no face.
00:06:53.000 I'm not gonna do this.
00:06:55.000 Why am I a face?
00:06:56.000 So, we have the faceless man and the ninja.
00:06:58.000 Faceless man.
00:06:59.000 Walking through.
00:07:01.000 Who likes it?
00:07:06.000 Nobody likes you guys.
00:07:07.000 Thank you.
00:07:09.000 Nobody likes the ninja and the faceless man.
00:07:11.000 Who could they be?
00:07:14.000 Where are my cousins?
00:07:19.000 So where's Andrew?
00:07:21.000 Andrew's been held by the Romanian customs because we live here and we have European Union passports, but we walked into the entrance hall normally covering our faces.
00:07:34.000 He's the faceless man.
00:07:35.000 Everyone looked at him like he was a idiot.
00:07:37.000 And then he went to the thing and was like, oh, it's okay, I live here.
00:07:39.000 Like, what are you doing here?
00:07:41.000 And they're questioning him super hard because I think he's a jackass.
00:07:43.000 Well, yeah, he's the faceless man.
00:07:45.000 Would you let the faceless man in your country?
00:07:47.000 I hope they send him back to Dubai.
00:07:49.000 I hope they send him back. No faceless men allowed.
00:07:52.000 I hope they send him back. I don't care.
00:07:55.000 Ah, so they let the faceless man in the country.
00:07:58.000 Yeah, the fucking dude was like...
00:08:00.000 Commercial residence. Then some other dude comes up to me and goes, ah, my brother or dad, I see you fight last week.
00:08:06.000 Okay, go.
00:08:10.000 I'm so clear missing remaining.
00:08:13.000 Even as the faceless man.
00:08:17.000 Who's this man without a face?
00:08:22.000 Smack him in the face, then like eat him.
00:08:24.000 Right there.
00:08:26.000 Roll over Jones.
00:08:28.000 I'm a bit jealous.
00:08:30.000 I'm a bit jealous.
00:08:32.000 I do wish I could be the faceless man.
00:08:34.000 No, I got one of these. I'll give you all one.
00:08:36.000 You can all become faceless men.
00:08:37.000 The faceless men? Now we travel facelessly.
00:08:40.000 We have faceless men, all three of us.
00:08:43.000 Those men are like, who the fuck is that?
00:08:44.000 We're faceless. They want me to wear a mask.
00:08:47.000 I'll wear a mask. I'll wear no face.
00:08:49.000 If they tell me to take that off, put a mask on.
00:08:50.000 I'll put a mask on underneath and still cover my face.
00:08:52.000 Still be faceless. Faceless man.
00:08:59.000 Don't you love when your Mac updates?
00:09:01.000 No. It's two hours, bro.
00:09:03.000 It's only two hours, and when it's done, I can use my Mac exactly like before.
00:09:08.000 That's why I just pressed cancel. No, but don't admit that's worth it.
00:09:12.000 I just canceled. So you download 15 gig, and you update, and when the two hours is finally finished, and the update's finally finished, you can use your Mac exactly like before.
00:09:20.000 That's a good deal. No, I pressed cancel.
00:09:22.000 Luke! That's a good idea.
00:09:24.000 Update your Mac. I compel you to update your computer right now.
00:09:27.000 No, that'd be absolutely- Just all update on computers, so we can all use them exactly like we already do.
00:09:32.000 I'm already using it.
00:09:34.000 Mike, listen. But I have Mac OS Big Sur.
00:09:39.000 It's true, I don't have Big Sur.
00:09:41.000 I mean, I don't think I do.
00:09:43.000 I don't know. I don't know the difference.
00:09:49.000 Probably just buys one more.
00:09:55.000 More spying. What are they going to see?
00:09:57.000 A bunch of fucking chicks. Oh, we're spied on Tank, this fucking endless pussy.
00:10:01.000 Ooh. I tell everyone that anyway.
00:10:04.000 That's all I do. I drive cars.
00:10:05.000 Everyone wondering what Tank does it is like.
00:10:07.000 I'm a multi-millionaire, this is what I do.
00:10:08.000 I drive fast cars, I fuck with it, and I fuck.
00:10:11.000 That's it. Everything else is shit.
00:10:13.000 So there. Spy campaign over.
00:10:15.000 I will be very upset that they may waste me two hours of my life just to spy with you.
00:10:19.000 It's all here. I better get some features.
00:10:22.000 So what's changed?
00:10:23.000 New background. Computers start at the background systems.
00:10:26.000 You're telling me there was another way I could have changed my computer background that didn't take three hours?
00:10:32.000 I actually might be able to do this.
00:10:33.000 It is. Impossible. Frick of time.
00:10:35.000 Only another 26 minutes of unproductive nothing.
00:10:38.000 You might get a new background, man. Look at this.
00:10:41.000 Let's see what happens next.
00:10:44.000 Let me just see what Luke has for his background.
00:10:46.000 Oh, I've seen this one before.
00:10:48.000 Yeah. In fact, I've seen it for months.
00:10:49.000 Yeah. That's right.
00:10:51.000 You don't have a special one.
00:10:54.000 Turned Siri off. I don't want to be spied on.
00:10:56.000 Yeah. They're going to spy on me anyway, but I'll at least turn it off.
00:10:59.000 I'm not going to agree to be spied.
00:11:02.000 Nice. Black screen. Nice.
00:11:04.000 Perfect. That would be funny if it all broke down.
00:11:07.000 Nice. Incompatible.
00:11:09.000 Boom. This is a new apartment system.
00:11:10.000 I love this new apartment. Nice.
00:11:12.000 So that's it. So I guess maybe it's all voice controlled?
00:11:17.000 It's all voice controlled. It's mind controlled.
00:11:19.000 You close your eyes. Do my work for me.
00:11:24.000 Loading. Nice.
00:11:26.000 Boom. Nice. So everything's the exact same, but you have a new color.
00:11:30.000 I have a new background. Does that at least change when it's light and dark like mine does?
00:11:35.000 Or did they get rid of that? What's that?
00:11:37.000 Listen, that's old technology.
00:11:38.000 All I know is this.
00:11:40.000 I have a new background.
00:11:41.000 You're a fucking loser. Alright, have fun with your background.
00:11:46.000 I'll keep enjoying my computer as I have for the last three hours.
00:11:50.000 Apple, fuck your update.
00:11:53.000 You've got to force it down my throat.
00:11:54.000 Never updating.
00:11:56.000 Never will.
00:11:58.000 Never will.
00:12:01.000 We have a back up plan.
00:12:02.000 We're just going to pull him off the flashlight to plug it in.
00:12:04.000 Yep, every time.
00:12:05.000 So where are your flashlights?
00:12:07.000 It doesn't let him move.
00:12:09.000 It's actually super nice.
00:12:10.000 I didn't realize. This is actually a very bright red flashlight.
00:12:14.000 It is actually an emergency.
00:12:19.000 It is actually an emergency.
00:12:21.000 Emergency meeting.
00:12:23.000 Emergency meeting.
00:12:25.000 People will take on that to think it's an emergency meeting.
00:12:29.000 What they don't know is that we don't record most of the stuff.
00:12:31.000 Oh, fuck.
00:12:32.000 So we do a lot more emergency meetings than they even know about.
00:12:36.000 Right. Our whole life is endless emergency meetings.
00:12:39.000 Black or blue?
00:12:41.000 Blue. Blue?
00:12:42.000 None. None of the above.
00:12:44.000 Oh, you can't get whiskey in a fucking emergency.
00:12:46.000 No. It's a fucking cigar.
00:12:48.000 In a cigar. Emergency cigars.
00:12:49.000 I'm getting emergency KFC. Emergency cigars.
00:12:52.000 How you don't fuck yourself? How about emergency Emergency meeting.
00:13:01.000 Yeah, so basically what happened is we haven't recorded any of it.
00:13:03.000 We did an emergency meeting for one minute, and the lights came on, and we left, and the lights cut out again, and we went back, and then it's the third time.
00:13:08.000 It's the third emergency meeting.
00:13:10.000 It's the third emergency meeting. And Tristan keeps making me drink a whiskey per emergency.
00:13:13.000 He goes, oh, another shot of whiskey.
00:13:16.000 Let's not get any drink per power cup.
00:13:19.000 No. You'd think that'd be an easy thing to accept.
00:13:22.000 One drink per power cut.
00:13:24.000 You'd think, oh, I could do my life like that.
00:13:26.000 That'd be easy. I know.
00:13:27.000 This is mine from last time, which I didn't drink because I knew that this was going to happen.
00:13:31.000 This is ass.
00:13:32.000 I was like, the internet started to get back on, get back to normal, right about to do something.
00:13:38.000 Boom. Turns off. This is ass.
00:13:39.000 What does James Bond drink?
00:13:41.000 Tell me. I'm glad I didn't cancel my emergency KSC. Ah, okay.
00:13:45.000 Lights back on. Guys, should we actually just say this?
00:13:48.000 I'm starting to not believe it.
00:13:50.000 I'm gonna get my laptop because I actually have things to do.
00:13:52.000 And we'll start in front of them, so you can't run.
00:13:54.000 Can you get my laptop too?
00:13:56.000 You can't run.
00:13:58.000 Why is the fuck the glasses here?
00:14:09.000 This isn't me. Don't fucking look at me.
00:14:12.000 You called the emergency meeting.
00:14:14.000 No, I am calling the emergency meeting.
00:14:15.000 Alright, that's... What are you doing, mandatory booze?
00:14:18.000 It's 9.45. We literally just woke up.
00:14:23.000 You can't start your morning.