Tate Speech - July 24, 2022


Deep Underground | Tate Confidential Ep. 57


Episode Stats

Length

13 minutes

Words per Minute

136.78218

Word Count

1,842

Sentence Count

245

Misogynist Sentences

3

Hate Speech Sentences

3


Summary

This is a nonsense episode where we're in a salt mine and we're eating Domino's and we don't know what's going on. It's hard to make sense of it all, but we'll do our best to try and make sense out of it, but it's probably not going to make any sense to anyone else but us, so we'll try our absolute best to make it make sense to us. Nothing makes sense, but that's what makes it nonsense, right? This is The Nonsense Episode, where Luke and Rory are deep underground in a mountain and they don't have any idea what they're doing, so they do the only thing that makes sense to them, which is drinking Corona and eating pizza and not knowing what else to do with it. And it's not even funny, it's just pure, unadulterated, nonsense. Enjoy! The NANOMONDS EPISODE, hosted by Luke & Rory, is out now, and is out on all of the social medias, if you search for it, you'll find us on Anchor.fm/TheNonsenseEpisodal. Have a listen and tell us what you think of it! If you like it, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts! or wherever else you're listening to podcasts. We'll be looking out for the next week's nonsense episode. Thank you for listening to The NONSENSE EPISODES! XOXOXO. xoxo, Rory & Luke - The NANCY EPISodalberto@mccartan@t.co/thenarcr@thenonsense@tacom@tayo@crm@cracom.co.nz&p&p=a&qid=3q&q=3&qn&qb=8q&t=3s&qref=1q=8&qq&s=1&qx&qw=3Q&qk&qzn=3a=3A&qr&qt=7&q_s=3d&qd=3P&q &qq=then_n=1 And if you're looking for more nonsense episode, please tweet us and we'll send us your nonsense episode! We'll get back to you soon!


Transcript

00:00:00.000 Good shot there from Tate!
00:00:02.000 A lot of people say girls love money and that's not entirely true.
00:00:20.000 I'm not sure if that's true.
00:00:22.000 I'm not sure.
00:00:24.000 🎵
00:00:38.000 Rory, the world has to know the truth.
00:00:42.000 What? That we're addicted to Domino's.
00:00:44.000 What truth? The world needs to know anything.
00:00:47.000 The world needs to know that I made a promise, and that promise is to get fat.
00:00:52.000 We're addicted to Domino's.
00:00:54.000 We are. We keep eating pizzas.
00:00:57.000 One pizza each.
00:00:58.000 And that's for breakfast.
00:01:01.000 Well, we haven't eaten anything else today.
00:01:03.000 We haven't, but we're going to.
00:01:06.000 True. I know us.
00:01:09.000 Every day when I wake up, I say to myself, I'm not going to order Domino's today.
00:01:13.000 And I get down, I do my emails, I do my shit I need to do.
00:01:17.000 And within about an hour, I say, hmm, what can I eat?
00:01:21.000 And the first thing that comes into my mind is Domino's.
00:01:23.000 It doesn't even taste good anymore.
00:01:25.000 And what got me today was, this is how advertising can be very effective in marketing.
00:01:30.000 Because what got me today was, as soon as I mentioned Domino's, I thought about Domino's, I went online, and the first thing I've seen...
00:01:36.000 My phone's bugged.
00:01:37.000 The first thing I'd seen was an advert for Dominic.
00:01:41.000 And that took me over the edge.
00:01:43.000 The delicious bubbling cheese in the picture got me.
00:01:48.000 And here I am, now eating, and it's not half as good as it looked or smelled, but I can't stop eating.
00:01:55.000 It's not even good.
00:01:57.000 It's not. I feel sick.
00:01:58.000 Yeah, I feel sick, Rory.
00:01:59.000 Every day, I feel sick.
00:02:01.000 It's given me a bellyache, but I just want to eat more.
00:02:05.000 I know I really want the fucking cookies because the pizza is not happiness and I've eaten four slices So we keep forgetting to film things so nothing intake confidential makes sense So, thank you.
00:02:21.000 So the car broke and we got the train and the train broke.
00:02:24.000 Yeah. Now we're here about 100 kilometers from the nearest paved road.
00:02:28.000 Yeah. High up in the mountains and you're drinking whiskey.
00:02:31.000 I always carry personal whiskey.
00:02:34.000 None of this episode makes any sense.
00:02:36.000 It literally won't make sense to anyone watching.
00:02:38.000 The nonsense episode. This is the nonsense episode.
00:02:41.000 It's the nonsense episode. Well, our full-time cameraman is in England doing his thing.
00:02:48.000 Luke is crying about his Ferrari at home because he's a geek.
00:02:52.000 I'm not going to record myself.
00:02:55.000 The nonsense episode.
00:02:57.000 Fine. Yeah, it's clips of stuff.
00:03:00.000 Now I'm here, now I'm there.
00:03:01.000 I do this. It's my whole life.
00:03:04.000 It's all I remember. Cunts.
00:03:09.000 It's a nonsense episode.
00:03:11.000 Where are we? We're in a salt mine.
00:03:14.000 Because it's a nonsense episode. Nothing makes sense.
00:03:16.000 It's where we're in a salt mine half a mile underground.
00:03:19.000 We were on a mountain, and now we're underground.
00:03:22.000 Take confidential!
00:03:24.000 Why are you...
00:03:38.000 Nature's disinfectant.
00:03:46.000 I think it's something because...
00:03:48.000 It's like 15 meters underground.
00:03:54.000 What did you say?
00:04:03.000 I was already thinking, in case of an earthquake and a collapse, I was going to commandeer all the food supplies.
00:04:06.000 It's nice that the food is here.
00:04:08.000 Because I can murder everyone and...
00:04:10.000 Commandeer the food.
00:04:11.000 Yeah, I'm always thinking worst case.
00:04:14.000 Earthquake. The mine's blocked.
00:04:15.000 Chilean miners style scenario.
00:04:18.000 First, I murdered...
00:04:19.000 Why is everything so fucking high?
00:04:21.000 I'm having brain attacks.
00:04:24.000 I fucking hate heights. What's that, a lake?
00:04:27.000 Yeah, let's go swimming. Not water.
00:04:30.000 There's monsters in that water, bro.
00:04:31.000 We're a mile underground.
00:04:33.000 There's monsters.
00:04:35.000 I still see them coming.
00:04:37.000 Hello?
00:04:41.000 Hello.
00:04:43.000 Hello!
00:04:45.000 Shut up, kid.
00:04:47.000 Hello!
00:04:57.000 Thank you for watching!
00:05:00.000 Get a boat. So now we're rowing a boat at the bottom of a lake.
00:05:14.000 Unbelievably deep underground in a salt mine.
00:05:17.000 When we were on top of the mountain.
00:05:20.000 We haven't filmed anything.
00:05:21.000 Nothing makes sense. So I've got a mask on so I don't get COVID down here.
00:05:24.000 Yeah, why are you scared of Corona?
00:05:26.000 You're not scared of Corona. You said there's Corona down here.
00:05:28.000 Yeah, there's definitely Corona down here.
00:05:31.000 Is there? Yeah, the salt is making my lungs pure.
00:05:34.000 I need some cigar smoke.
00:05:36.000 Some more booze to clear my lungs out.
00:05:39.000 Reminds me. It's just a nonsense episode.
00:05:43.000 Nothing makes sense. There's no continuity.
00:05:45.000 None of this makes any sense.
00:05:50.000 You don't need a drink.
00:05:56.000 How many of them? I've seen you drink at least ten of them in the last three days.
00:05:59.000 The travel size. The whole car is full of them.
00:06:03.000 It's fun size. What does it mean fun?
00:06:05.000 Fun size. It doesn't make sense.
00:06:09.000 I can't have a little...
00:06:16.000 Suddenly, because I'm rowing a boat in the bottom of a lake, I might have to have a little bit of whiskey.
00:06:24.000 Rushing. Do you want some?
00:06:27.000 No. Why?
00:06:34.000 Why what? Why do we do this to ourselves?
00:06:38.000 Because we're gluttonous pigs.
00:06:41.000 And Andrew and Tristan are here to control my fattery.
00:06:44.000 My fattery is here for summer.
00:06:47.000 Most people, when it gets to summer, they think, oh, can't cut down and stop eating.
00:06:52.000 Well, I'll show you can't.
00:06:54.000 Oh, my stomach hurts super bad.
00:06:57.000 I don't care if I'm fat. In fact, my objective is to get fat.
00:07:03.000 So if anyone sees me getting fatter in these videos, don't call them, because you've seen nothing yet.
00:07:08.000 You've seen nothing. Come eat down.
00:07:12.000 Here's to the Colonel, here's to Ronald, and all the other fucking legends in the game.
00:07:18.000 My stomach fucking hurts.
00:07:20.000 Why do we do that? No, it's for me. Tell the camera what we eat.
00:07:23.000 We've eaten too much chicken.
00:07:25.000 We've eaten two of these boxes, which have eight pieces of strips each, and then we've also eaten the fucking sandwich.
00:07:32.000 And we still have the fucking crispy, this thing, whatever that is.
00:07:36.000 And you know what, I'm in pain, but it's delicious.
00:07:38.000 No, I'm in super pain.
00:07:40.000 Complimented with some garlic sauce.
00:07:42.000 I actually can't be filming anymore, Rory, I gotta cut.
00:07:45.000 Alright, cut, but I'll be back.
00:07:47.000 You heard it here fast.
00:07:49.000 A few moments later.
00:07:51.000 So, Rory, what just happened?
00:07:54.000 I just went to kneel down on my knees back.
00:07:58.000 Which thing? The right one.
00:08:01.000 Ah! And there it is.
00:08:12.000 Oh, Rory. I'm going to sleep and I'm never waking up again.
00:08:21.000 How did that happen?
00:08:25.000 That's happened to me once, though, before, Rory.
00:08:27.000 I will admit, that did happen to me once.
00:08:29.000 And the thing is, it's going to be horrible because it's like two weeks of pain, bro.
00:08:32.000 I'm telling you, it's going to be a long time.
00:08:34.000 I couldn't walk upstairs for a while.
00:08:37.000 Bro. Ah!
00:08:39.000 So what happened was I went to kneel down and then it just popped and then I fell.
00:08:47.000 Now I'm here in pain.
00:08:49.000 I saw you fall and I thought you laid down on purpose.
00:08:53.000 Whoa. No.
00:08:56.000 I went to work off the chicken.
00:08:59.000 To work off the chicken by laying down.
00:09:02.000 I thought, yeah, I was going to do a few press-ups, I don't know.
00:09:05.000 A few stretching. We've actually eaten too much chicken.
00:09:08.000 I feel like throwing up. I can't talk anymore.
00:09:10.000 I'm in pain. I'm actually in pain.
00:09:14.000 Oh, that hurt. I don't know what hurts more, my stomach and my knees.
00:09:20.000 What's happening to us, Rory?
00:09:23.000 I don't know. We're losing our minds.
00:09:26.000 Why do we eat that much?
00:09:28.000 We ate what? Alright, so first you cooked chicken and sweet potatoes for both of us.
00:09:34.000 We ate them all.
00:09:35.000 So first, what did I make?
00:09:38.000 I made sweet potatoes, wedges, with a couple of chicken breasts, spiced them up a bit.
00:09:44.000 It was really good. Chefron.
00:09:45.000 Chefron, that's correct. And then...
00:09:49.000 For some reason you went fucking nuts and ordered loads of fucking chicken wings and me being a gluttonous cunt decided to eat everything and then I was in pain so I come away from my desk for a lay down and my knee pops out.
00:10:04.000 I'm in all sorts of pain.
00:10:07.000 And the burpees. I'm sure you're still in therapy.
00:10:09.000 I did the burpees on Monday.
00:10:11.000 Yeah, my lower back hurts from that.
00:10:13.000 What a nice stretch out after a big, beautiful health.
00:10:16.000 But no, there's no happiness anywhere for me.
00:10:19.000 I think this is the end.
00:10:21.000 Bro, I think we need to get some chocolate.
00:10:24.000 And this is what's wrong with me.
00:10:26.000 I'm so greedy.
00:10:28.000 I wouldn't say no.
00:10:32.000 I'm just going to sit here and reflect on my life for a little while.
00:10:36.000 I'll get you the chocolate, bro.
00:10:38.000 And something like that, it's funny talking to you.
00:10:40.000 Ha ha ha.
00:10:42.000 What is the word of the day?
00:10:46.000 I don't know.
00:10:49.000 Bro, it's Saturday. What's the word of the day?
00:10:51.000 I don't know. It doesn't matter if it's Monday, Tuesday, all the way to Sunday.
00:10:57.000 The word of the day is the same.
00:10:59.000 What's the word of the day? Cash!
00:11:02.000 Word of the day is cash.
00:11:04.000 I wake up in the morning and I check the bank.
00:11:08.000 Do you understand what I'm saying to you, Luke? I do.
00:11:10.000 No, you don't understand. I wake up.
00:11:11.000 First thing I do, I grab my phone, bitches, hoes, cancel all that, and I check the bank.
00:11:17.000 I check the internet banking app, and guess what it's full of?
00:11:20.000 Cash. Cash! I ain't borrowing money from no bank.
00:11:23.000 I go to the bank and say, you can hold my money for me.
00:11:27.000 I don't have to go there and say, please, I need help to buy a house.
00:11:30.000 I do everything in cash.
00:11:31.000 This house. Iron clad, like a bat fucking cane.
00:11:36.000 What did I buy it with? Cash.
00:11:37.000 Cash. $35,000 watch, cash.
00:11:41.000 $5,000 shirt, cash.
00:11:44.000 You see that hot tub? Cash?
00:11:47.000 Cash! I ain't playing games.
00:11:50.000 I got fit hoes, beautiful women in the pimp game.
00:11:53.000 I got Bitcoin on the blockchain.
00:11:56.000 It's all cash.
00:11:57.000 I'm Mr. Cash. People come along and go, I'm asset rich, my assets.
00:12:01.000 Assets? I got cash.
00:12:04.000 Talk about fucking assets.
00:12:06.000 One by one, we can talk about everything I own.
00:12:09.000 And I bought it with the same motherfucking thing.
00:12:11.000 Cash. Look, let's look over here.
00:12:13.000 Let's have a conversation about the Aston Martin V12. Six liter, only 175 in the world, special edition.
00:12:21.000 Most of them are in car collections.
00:12:23.000 Mine's out here on the streets.
00:12:24.000 And I bought it in cash.
00:12:27.000 Lamborghini Huracan, drop top, spider.
00:12:30.000 It's reflective.
00:12:33.000 Cash. I went into Porsche, bought a 992, then sent it to Germany, spent extra money on the body kit, the power kit, upgraded it, and I did it all in fucking cash.
00:12:45.000 What's the word of the day?
00:12:47.000 Cash.
00:12:47.000 Cash!
00:12:48.000 Rory did leave with the pizzas.
00:13:06.000 you We all left.
00:13:09.000 I've driven the girls home.
00:13:10.000 There's a man in the pool eating pizza and burping.
00:13:14.000 That does sound like... In the pool eating pizza.
00:13:19.000 So... There were girls in the pool and they said they left because there's a guy burping and eating pizza in the pool.