Tate Speech - June 29, 2025


Drift Off the Cliff | Tate Confidential Ep 307


Episode Stats

Length

14 minutes

Words per Minute

166.09589

Word Count

2,425

Sentence Count

399

Misogynist Sentences

12

Hate Speech Sentences

7


Summary

Tristan and Andrew are in a car crash and need to get out of there in order to survive, but they don t know where to go from here. They take a car ride down a cliff, but there's no way to get to the other side without falling off the cliff. Will they make it?


Transcript

00:00:00.000 Everyone's on smoke today.
00:00:01.000 Luke's a professional drifter, so...
00:00:05.000 You don't even know who that is, you fucking yank.
00:00:08.000 He's gonna hate everyone at this house.
00:00:10.000 Nobody, nobody tell you.
00:00:16.000 So Tristan fucked us.
00:00:17.000 Tristan's selfish.
00:00:18.000 Andrew got things.
00:00:19.000 He got things for all of us.
00:00:20.000 Loads.
00:00:21.000 I went to the random Asians by the side of the road and ordered loads and loads and loads of food.
00:00:26.000 So everyone had food.
00:00:27.000 Tristan disappears and comes back with one Subway sandwich.
00:00:30.000 Well aware that I had ordered food just to feed himself.
00:00:33.000 He's selfish.
00:00:34.000 He's selfish.
00:00:35.000 And the Subway Sandwich looks good.
00:00:37.000 He just ate it all.
00:00:38.000 Why did you do that?
00:00:39.000 You know, I don't like iServices.
00:00:42.000 You can't just do that.
00:00:44.000 Yeah.
00:00:45.000 Why weren't you like, you know what, this subway sandwich that I'm really going to enjoy and I look forward to, I'd like to also give this to my brother and my cousin.
00:00:53.000 I thought of you.
00:00:54.000 Yeah.
00:00:54.000 He thought about us when he got his order.
00:00:57.000 He just got loads.
00:00:57.000 He just got unlimited.
00:00:58.000 Characteristically unandrew-like boat.
00:01:01.000 Fuck.
00:01:02.000 And what is today's biggest sucker on Tate Confidential?
00:01:06.000 Just admit you're a selfish talk.
00:01:07.000 Yeah, just admit you're selfish.
00:01:09.000 Just admit it.
00:01:10.000 I bought this for you.
00:01:11.000 You didn't call me.
00:01:12.000 No, because you don't have two.
00:01:13.000 They're two separate sandwiches.
00:01:14.000 You don't have two.
00:01:15.000 Andrew, I bought this for you.
00:01:17.000 And you've been calling me horrible names.
00:01:19.000 So now I'm going to eat it.
00:01:21.000 He didn't.
00:01:22.000 He bought it for himself.
00:01:23.000 He bought it for himself.
00:01:25.000 I did it.
00:01:25.000 Unless there are three sandwiches, one for each of us in this car.
00:01:28.000 There are no three.
00:01:29.000 There weren't three, were there?
00:01:31.000 No.
00:01:31.000 Yeah, there were.
00:01:32.000 That's what I thought.
00:01:33.000 Because they were both for you.
00:01:35.000 So excited.
00:01:36.000 Most excited man in the world.
00:01:37.000 Mr. Happy.
00:01:41.000 Channel for you.
00:01:44.000 Ah, there he is.
00:01:46.000 There he is.
00:01:48.000 Chelford.
00:01:49.000 You gonna do that?
00:01:52.000 Hey Abro, how are you doing?
00:01:53.000 Nice to meet you.
00:01:54.000 What a favorite.
00:01:55.000 What a pleasure.
00:01:56.000 How are you doing?
00:01:56.000 It's great.
00:01:57.000 More than I've been doing.
00:01:58.000 Looking forward to it.
00:01:58.000 It's gonna be fine.
00:01:59.000 Well, yeah, definitely.
00:02:00.000 I'm not gonna be able to do that, but it's still gonna be fun.
00:02:03.000 What's your idea?
00:02:04.000 Business idea.
00:02:05.000 You have a business idea.
00:02:06.000 Yeah.
00:02:06.000 I'm chewing gum and zinning at the same time.
00:02:09.000 Okay.
00:02:10.000 The gum's gonna be fine.
00:02:11.000 Come inside.
00:02:12.000 I mean, a little bit of warm-up.
00:02:13.000 Ah, warm's fine.
00:02:14.000 Yeah, warm fine.
00:02:15.000 Do you have a cigarette?
00:02:15.000 No.
00:02:16.000 We have zinn.
00:02:17.000 No problem.
00:02:18.000 You're a better man than me.
00:02:19.000 Back to my business idea.
00:02:23.000 Where's the nearest cliff?
00:02:24.000 I want you to flip it from there down the hill.
00:02:27.000 No, I'm not gonna do that.
00:02:30.000 We're doing conflicting ideas right now.
00:02:32.000 He needs to drift or off the cliff.
00:02:34.000 But for content, it'll be good content.
00:02:35.000 If he chews the gum, it'd be a good adverb on the way down.
00:02:39.000 Bailey filmed.
00:02:40.000 Bailey jumps after the car.
00:02:41.000 You can film him chewing the gum as he drifts off the cliff.
00:02:44.000 There must be a cliff here.
00:02:45.000 Bailey.
00:02:46.000 None of this is.
00:02:46.000 There must be a cliff where he drifts the car off the cliff.
00:02:51.000 You know?
00:02:53.000 This results in both of us dying.
00:02:54.000 We get filthy.
00:02:55.000 The cameraman never dies.
00:02:57.000 That's not true, though.
00:02:58.000 It is true.
00:02:59.000 No, Luke, it is true.
00:03:00.000 The cameraman never dies.
00:03:01.000 Where's the cliff?
00:03:02.000 Intermediate, and then we go forward for the high zone.
00:03:06.000 Okay.
00:03:06.000 So I would love you guys to, you know, test your boundaries.
00:03:10.000 Love it.
00:03:10.000 That'll be good fun.
00:03:12.000 It's a lovely thing.
00:03:12.000 Thank you.
00:03:14.000 Let's do it.
00:03:15.000 I've been watching you guys on the TV program and suddenly, oh, you're out of the TV.
00:03:19.000 You're out of the mobile phone.
00:03:20.000 We're here.
00:03:21.000 Well, Luke's a professional drifter, so I'm not at all.
00:03:26.000 There's no one who can drift like me.
00:03:27.000 Fuck those guys.
00:03:28.000 I think they're good.
00:03:29.000 He said, I'll beat them all.
00:03:30.000 They're nothing.
00:03:31.000 They're scum.
00:03:33.000 Luke was saying that the whole car ride down here.
00:03:35.000 I wouldn't mind here.
00:03:36.000 You already high-rated now.
00:03:37.000 We didn't even see you now.
00:03:39.000 Great button with a blood splash car.
00:03:42.000 I'm just amazed by Tristan's do-rag.
00:03:44.000 Yeah.
00:03:44.000 That's the most black thing I've ever seen you do.
00:03:46.000 You want Marcel here, Mom?
00:03:48.000 I'm all that black.
00:03:49.000 What are you talking about, Marcel?
00:03:50.000 Yeah, I don't think I'll do a 10.
00:03:51.000 I'm on Hendrick and go.
00:03:52.000 I've been in four serious car crashes, and I have a pathological fear of driving fast on the passenger.
00:03:57.000 But you know what?
00:03:58.000 Luckily, we have Luke.
00:04:00.000 Ah, Luke!
00:04:00.000 Luke!
00:04:01.000 There you go.
00:04:01.000 Everything is on the shoulder, my boy.
00:04:03.000 They're going to do a professional's full-speed dangerous run, and Tristan obviously was in car crashes, and I'm obviously the superstar.
00:04:09.000 And if I died, the whole thing's over.
00:04:13.000 You got all the points for it today.
00:04:14.000 All the lines.
00:04:16.000 Did they get you?
00:04:16.000 They're professional drifters.
00:04:17.000 I have zero problem with that.
00:04:19.000 Nice.
00:04:19.000 I have completely zero issues.
00:04:22.000 I don't.
00:04:22.000 You're lying to me.
00:04:23.000 I don't have anything.
00:04:24.000 Your cousin's holding out on the cigarettes.
00:04:25.000 I'm not.
00:04:26.000 Look, we're not poor anymore.
00:04:27.000 You give me a cigarette for me.
00:04:28.000 No.
00:04:28.000 You know what, Tristan?
00:04:29.000 Remember the Subway?
00:04:30.000 You're not my own cousin.
00:04:31.000 Do you remember the Subway?
00:04:32.000 He's selfish.
00:04:33.000 And the Subway Sanders looks good.
00:04:35.000 He just ate it all.
00:04:36.000 Haley, so what you don't realize is just before this, before you came, he ordered Subway.
00:04:40.000 Well, guess who he ordered for?
00:04:42.000 Let's know.
00:04:42.000 Yeah.
00:04:43.000 Because you know Tristan, don't you?
00:04:45.000 You know who he is.
00:04:46.000 And one other person.
00:04:47.000 No, and he ate both of them.
00:04:49.000 I did eat both.
00:04:50.000 He ate both.
00:04:50.000 Yes, I did eat both.
00:04:51.000 They were both for him originally.
00:04:53.000 They always were.
00:04:54.000 If they were for someone else, wouldn't he get three?
00:04:56.000 No, I didn't.
00:04:57.000 One wasn't for you.
00:04:58.000 Watch out for the cliffs.
00:04:59.000 Watch out for the clutch.
00:05:00.000 You don't even know what that is, you fucking yank.
00:05:02.000 Cliffs.
00:05:02.000 Yeah, watch out for the clutch.
00:05:04.000 You don't even know what that is, you fucking yank.
00:05:05.000 Clutch, clutch.
00:05:06.000 You can't even drive a fucking manual.
00:05:07.000 You're a dumb fucker.
00:05:09.000 Andrew's gonna do shit.
00:05:10.000 I'm gonna do better.
00:05:11.000 Everyone's on smoke today.
00:05:14.000 No idea.
00:05:15.000 No idea.
00:05:39.000 I see you got it.
00:05:41.000 Not quite.
00:05:42.000 *Squeak*
00:05:57.000 Luke, Luke.
00:05:58.000 Yeah?
00:05:59.000 We're going off a cliff.
00:06:00.000 No.
00:06:01.000 No, there's no cliffs.
00:06:02.000 Luke, we've had enough.
00:06:03.000 No.
00:06:04.000 Life's we're done with life.
00:06:06.000 All right, what was your prediction?
00:06:08.000 Luke.
00:06:09.000 Yeah.
00:06:10.000 Luke's alive.
00:06:11.000 Bailey, I really feel him in these cars.
00:06:14.000 Shit.
00:06:14.000 Luke stole my helmet.
00:06:15.000 Shit.
00:06:15.000 No, but they should have brought you a helmet for that.
00:06:17.000 I stole Tristan's helmet.
00:06:19.000 I'll admit it.
00:06:19.000 He stole your sandwich.
00:06:20.000 You stole his helmet.
00:06:21.000 I don't know if you realize this.
00:06:23.000 What?
00:06:24.000 I've got nothing left to live for.
00:06:26.000 That's not true.
00:06:26.000 He has plenty of things to live for.
00:06:28.000 He's lying.
00:06:29.000 He's bluffing.
00:06:30.000 Oh, yeah, I'm bluffing.
00:06:32.000 You might not be bluffing.
00:06:33.000 Get in.
00:06:37.000 Luke, any last words?
00:06:39.000 If I die, it was Tristan's fault.
00:06:41.000 Is someone there?
00:06:42.000 That's a better idea.
00:06:50.000 I'm here, come on.
00:06:58.000 No air con.
00:06:59.000 But do you see the nerd over there with his camera?
00:07:02.000 That's the guy to hit.
00:07:03.000 Let's go straight into him.
00:07:04.000 Try and first lull him into safety.
00:07:06.000 Get him away from the tires.
00:07:08.000 Away from the tire barrier.
00:07:09.000 First, we got to show off.
00:07:10.000 Get some good drifting going.
00:07:11.000 Some donuts.
00:07:12.000 Get Bailey nice and safe.
00:07:13.000 Nice and comfortable.
00:07:14.000 Nice.
00:07:15.000 For the kill.
00:07:16.000 Bailey thinks I'm dying, but he doesn't realize we're after him.
00:07:19.000 Right?
00:07:20.000 That's the actual plan, right?
00:07:21.000 Absolutely.
00:07:25.000 Coming for you, Bailey.
00:07:26.000 Keep trying to take my job.
00:07:28.000 Sorry.
00:07:31.000 Come on.
00:07:49.000 That's love speed.
00:07:50.000 The faster you learn, the faster you earn.
00:07:52.000 The right knowledge applied at the right time can change your life overnight.
00:07:56.000 That's why, last week in the real world, we launched a brand new learning center built to keep you ahead no matter where you are in the world.
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00:08:25.000 No matter where you're from, nothing stands between you and success.
00:08:28.000 I'm a fan of the idea of $1.00.
00:08:30.000 I know the type of money.
00:08:32.000 I'm a dollar.
00:08:38.000 The real world ensures you have the most up-to-date ways to make money, and now it speaks your language.
00:08:43.000 The knowledge is here.
00:08:44.000 The professors are ready.
00:08:46.000 The only thing missing is you.
00:08:47.000 Join the real world today and start making money now.
00:08:50.000 I'm happy to.
00:08:56.000 Who's my passenger, Bailey?
00:08:57.000 I'll be your passenger.
00:08:58.000 This is hilarious because Luke's about to drive and Luke's American and Americans are never taught to drive ever because Americans are scum.
00:09:04.000 It's true.
00:09:04.000 So you don't even know how to drive a manual car.
00:09:07.000 I'm gonna have to explain to you how to drive a manual car while you're also trying to drift, which means that when you stop drifting, unless you put the clutch in, you're going to stall.
00:09:14.000 Okay, that doesn't mean anything to me.
00:09:15.000 It does.
00:09:16.000 The clutch is on the far left.
00:09:17.000 These words don't mean anything to me.
00:09:18.000 How do I learn to first?
00:09:19.000 There we go.
00:09:20.000 There you go.
00:09:20.000 So now you can let go of the clutch.
00:09:21.000 Better than Tristan.
00:09:22.000 Yeah, better than Tristan, because he stole because he's a faggot.
00:09:25.000 Good point.
00:09:26.000 So that's the brain.
00:09:28.000 Okay, these have these have to.
00:09:30.000 Come on.
00:09:31.000 Okay.
00:09:32.000 So now, to drift.
00:09:34.000 Now's the hard part.
00:09:35.000 Now I have to learn how to drift.
00:09:37.000 The first thing I have to do is get out of um Okay, so which way's the tire go?
00:09:42.000 Which way is the steering wheel go?
00:09:44.000 Ah, and you put the clutch in.
00:09:45.000 Nice.
00:09:45.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:09:46.000 Good.
00:09:46.000 So you're gonna go.
00:09:47.000 No, I've got it.
00:09:48.000 I've done these before.
00:09:49.000 I've done these before.
00:09:49.000 I've ridden bikes.
00:09:50.000 So I get it.
00:09:51.000 I get the whole clutch thing.
00:09:52.000 Okay, that's good.
00:09:53.000 Now I need to learn.
00:09:54.000 Okay, so now it's the drifting part.
00:09:57.000 So which way does the tire go?
00:09:59.000 Okay, wait, so first I'm gonna start in the turn, and then I'm gonna lose it in the turn.
00:10:04.000 You can.
00:10:04.000 And then I have to change the...
00:10:09.000 Got it.
00:10:10.000 Okay.
00:10:10.000 Leave the rest up to God.
00:10:12.000 We're already in first.
00:10:13.000 Yeah.
00:10:13.000 No need for brakes.
00:10:15.000 Full lock it right and I'll pump the thrall.
00:10:17.000 Oh Off the cliff old friend!
00:10:31.000 Pretty good!
00:10:33.000 Nice, nice, nice, nice, nice, nice!
00:10:37.000 Nice!
00:10:38.000 We found a few more than ever we want!
00:10:50.000 Ah, but clutch.
00:10:51.000 Forgot the clutch.
00:10:52.000 Forgot the clutch.
00:10:52.000 You almost were with somebody.
00:10:54.000 Forgot the clutch.
00:10:55.000 Alright, admit we didn't die.
00:10:56.000 Yeah, you're not the suicidal one.
00:10:58.000 This is the safest I'll ever be in a car, mate.
00:11:00.000 You're driving.
00:11:01.000 This can't be the safest I'll ever be in a car.
00:11:03.000 I'm driving.
00:11:04.000 Come on.
00:11:05.000 Yeah, at the end I got it.
00:11:06.000 Because you were on a trotter.
00:11:07.000 At the beginning, you were not on a trotter.
00:11:10.000 Wash off, wash off all the time.
00:11:13.000 But at the end?
00:11:14.000 At the end, I felt it.
00:11:15.000 Something of not being able to drift.
00:11:16.000 Bailey, how you feeling?
00:11:17.000 Nah, Bailey, you could get it.
00:11:18.000 You could do it.
00:11:18.000 You can't drive a manual.
00:11:19.000 No, but he can figure it out.
00:11:21.000 I can't drive a manual.
00:11:22.000 Andrew had to give me a tutorial while I was sitting in there, because I forgot.
00:11:24.000 At least you didn't crash.
00:11:25.000 I know.
00:11:26.000 Kristen didn't crash.
00:11:27.000 Remind me again.
00:11:27.000 Who crashed?
00:11:28.000 Who crashed?
00:11:28.000 It wasn't Luke and it wasn't me.
00:11:30.000 I didn't crash.
00:11:30.000 I attacked the tires.
00:11:32.000 Yeah.
00:11:33.000 To be fair, Luke promised me if I was going to crash to hit you.
00:11:37.000 I'm a ninja.
00:11:37.000 You can't hit me.
00:11:38.000 No, in fact, our plan, which you'll see because I recorded it, was to do really good donuts, to lull you into a sense of safety, to where you started to try and get closer to the car.
00:11:48.000 If I'm not doing something which is either extremely difficult or extremely stressful, I'm in a perpetual state of crippling boredom.
00:11:55.000 And if I don't fight, if I'm not in a situation where I'm stressed but worried or concerned, I'm just perpetually bored, boredom's crippling.
00:12:02.000 If you're an intelligent person and you've got a good brain on your shoulders, you can't just sit there for it.
00:12:07.000 I bet you did.
00:12:16.000 No, I'm a sicker.
00:12:19.000 No, you didn't do that purpose.
00:12:21.000 He's an open tapping something.
00:12:23.000 Don't watch his shot.
00:12:27.000 I think no matter what happens in this game, we can agree that Marcel's losers.
00:12:30.000 Marcel lost.
00:12:31.000 Oh, we agree.
00:12:31.000 Marcel lost.
00:12:32.000 Marcel lost.
00:12:34.000 You've got to be in it to it.
00:12:35.000 Marcel's not playing.
00:12:37.000 Exactly.
00:12:39.000 You've got to be in a twinned night.
00:12:40.000 You're playing the balls.
00:12:41.000 You've got to play the white.
00:12:43.000 Sick.
00:12:43.000 Stupid isn't really.
00:12:48.000 I hit it too hard.
00:12:51.000 I hit it too hard.
00:12:53.000 You know the problem with ball?
00:13:01.000 It's fucking boring.
00:13:03.000 It's not boring.
00:13:05.000 You gotta take the fun shots.
00:13:07.000 Shut up!
00:13:10.000 I've got the pink and the brown left.
00:13:12.000 It's something your mum won't first.
00:13:13.000 Wait, wait, wait, I'm in.
00:13:15.000 Those shoes are like automatic.
00:13:20.000 I've got the man who wears Crocs.
00:13:24.000 Crocs are allowed.
00:13:25.000 Nice.
00:13:25.000 So I get two shots now.
00:13:26.000 This game would be easier if I was good.
00:13:28.000 Sure.
00:13:29.000 Doctor Man trial and good.
00:13:34.000 Aw, fuck.
00:13:38.000 You would have hit that a little bit more to the right if we're going in.
00:13:40.000 Shut the fuck up!
00:13:42.000 Awwww!
00:13:45.000 Oh.
00:13:45.000 Fuck this game.
00:13:47.000 This game sucks.
00:13:51.000 This joke goes back further than when I hit my board.
00:13:54.000 People at home don't know.
00:13:56.000 This joke is my shot.
00:13:59.000 It's too funny.
00:14:00.000 I can't wait this is over, so I have to never play again.
00:14:02.000 You guys play cool, I'm going.
00:14:04.000 No, I definitely don't.
00:14:05.000 I definitely don't want to play.
00:14:07.000 You just hit it and do it.
00:14:13.000 Good shot.
00:14:14.000 Follow them.
00:14:17.000 So it's a draw.
00:14:18.000 Don't shake my hand, listen.
00:14:21.000 You called me out!
00:14:23.000 Just because you can't beat me.
00:14:26.000 Just because you can't beat me at home.
00:14:31.000 Okay.
00:14:32.000 Let me say.
00:14:34.000 It's on camera.
00:14:35.000 I've never lost.