Tate Speech - February 27, 2024


Mano a Mano, who wins? | Tate Confidential Ep 218


Episode Stats

Length

15 minutes

Words per Minute

134.27368

Word Count

2,126

Sentence Count

285

Misogynist Sentences

8

Hate Speech Sentences

9


Summary

Tristan and Andrew are in debt and need to get out of it, but can't seem to find a way to pay it off, so they turn to the one and only Batman to help them out. However, it doesn't go as planned, and they end up paying the price for it, and the consequences are not what they expected. This episode is brought to you by Anchor.fm and produced by Riley Bray. If you like what you hear, please HIT SUBSCRIBE and leave us a rating and review on Apple Podcasts and other podcasting platforms. We'll be looking out for you in the next episode, and if you leave a review, we'll read it to the next person who needs it. Thank you so much for all your support, it means a lot to us and we'll see you next week! Cheers, Andrew and Bailey xoxo - The Joker and Andrew - The Dark Lord - The Batman - The Good Doctor - The Bad Doctor - The Joker - The M.O.C.A.P.E.S.Y.S Please Rate/subscribe in iTunes and review the podcast on your favourite podcasting platform so we can spread the word to the world about this podcast! XOXOXO - Andrew and Alex - Andrew - the Joker - - the Batman - the Good Doctor The Batman Alex - the Joker Bailey - the Bad Boy Tristan - Adam - the Catwoman James - the Dark Lord Joe - the Black Widow John - the Cheeky Girl - the Boy - the Big Bad Girl Michael - the Man in Black the Bad Girl - and more and much more! Alex . And much more... Can't wait to see what happens next? Thanks for listening to this episode! - Andrew - the best friend of the Bad Guy :) - the Best Friend - the worst friend of The Joker? - and Alex's Dad - the Worst Friend , and the Boy, the Best Friends ? & the worst, the Worst, the Badest, the Most Beautiful, the most beautiful, the Greatest, the LUCKYEST, the MOST BADEST, THE MOST WORDS, THE BEST, the WORLDS


Transcript

00:00:00.000 What's my job, Bailey?
00:00:11.000 I can't say.
00:00:13.000 Do you even know what my actual job is?
00:00:17.000 I'm gonna make it clear now to the world.
00:00:19.000 I'm gonna finally come clean.
00:00:21.000 All of this time, I have been Batman.
00:00:25.000 Batman's just filthy rich with a strong sense of justice and knows Aikido.
00:00:30.000 That is me and everybody knows it.
00:00:32.000 So for that reason, I need a Batmobile.
00:00:34.000 Think about it. You don't need any superpowers.
00:00:37.000 You don't need to be a little homo like Spider-Man.
00:00:39.000 No, you just go get filthy rich, get big muscles, and fight super good.
00:00:43.000 And then you have to decide that the Matrix needs destroying.
00:00:46.000 All the bad guys need to pay a price.
00:00:48.000 I am Batman. I always have been.
00:00:50.000 And for that reason, I've decided to turn one of my SF90s into a Batmobile.
00:00:54.000 That's what we've done. I don't normally like black cars, but it looks amazing on them.
00:01:02.000 Yeah, something black is different.
00:01:04.000 Oh, beautiful. That is a Batmobile.
00:01:08.000 That is a Batmobile. We have to become Batman.
00:01:13.000 They all have to pay the price.
00:01:15.000 Admit when that overtakes you, you're gonna think, oh no, Batman.
00:01:24.000 Thanks again.
00:01:25.000 Admit it. Bailey, admit it.
00:01:29.000 I admit it. Admit it or we're all Batman.
00:01:33.000 You're the Joker, you're always laughing.
00:01:35.000 Ah, you've infiltrated my Batcave.
00:01:37.000 I've worked it out. Bailey's the Joker.
00:01:39.000 I'm Batman. Who's Tristan?
00:01:43.000 Catwoman. Why aren't the rims black?
00:01:44.000 It's coming. So it's technically not the Batmobile yet.
00:01:48.000 I'm getting there.
00:01:49.000 You're the Joker.
00:01:50.000 Alex, are those the poison pills?
00:02:16.000 No. These are the good pills.
00:02:21.000 Have you seen that movie The Good Doctor?
00:02:24.000 Are you the good doctor?
00:02:25.000 I'm trying. We have here, Bailey, a Vitamin C shot.
00:02:35.000 And also we have the best olive oil in the whole world.
00:02:44.000 So, I'll tell you exactly what I will do.
00:02:51.000 I will give the boys the vitamin C shot and the olive oil in order to protect their vitamin C levels.
00:03:06.000 Alex, we have vitamin cigarettes.
00:03:09.000 The true vitamin C. The thing is vitamin C is depleted when you smoke.
00:03:16.000 This is science.
00:03:19.000 So what I will do is to help their bodies to maintain normal dose of vitamin C every day.
00:03:35.000 You know, cigars and of course cigarettes have some benefits but Still, they have also some side effects.
00:03:45.000 Hi guys! So, we have here olive oil and vitamin C shot.
00:03:52.000 Tristan, who's your mate? It's Andrew's mate.
00:03:54.000 Why do we take this shit? Apparently you smoke too much.
00:03:58.000 Basically, olive oil, vitamin C shot, So we take this because you smoke too much and you deplete vitamin C levels.
00:04:11.000 So vitamin C from the shot will help to increase your levels of vitamin C in the body and the olive oil will help the liver to produce internal vitamin C. Guys, what are you doing?
00:04:30.000 I'm trying to protect you here.
00:04:33.000 C stands for cigar.
00:04:35.000 You can see me smoke.
00:04:37.000 I got all the vitamins I need right here.
00:04:42.000 Okay. But please, drink your shots.
00:04:46.000 Vitamin tea. Tobacco.
00:04:53.000 Nice. I've got it all.
00:04:56.000 There's nothing I can't do. Nice.
00:04:59.000 Where the fuck are all there?
00:05:01.000 There you have multivitamin, mineral, polyphenols.
00:05:06.000 Yeah.
00:05:10.000 You should bite.
00:05:14.000 You should take your own bite.
00:05:17.000 Bite Tristan!
00:05:18.000 Yeah.
00:05:19.000 He's right. Vitamin C. He's right.
00:05:24.000 All this time we've been smoking cigars seeing we're getting our vitamin C, but we're not, because we need to be smoking cigarettes!
00:05:30.000 That's the problem!
00:05:32.000 Finally, it's making sense.
00:05:34.000 We need some vitamin C. Sorry.
00:05:38.000 You're right. He was right, Tristan.
00:05:41.000 He was right. Cigar ain't gonna do it.
00:05:43.000 You're right. You're right, Alex.
00:05:47.000 You don't inhale those cigars.
00:05:48.000 You don't have the vitamin C in your lungs, you know?
00:05:53.000 I'm right. There is no more cigars.
00:05:59.000 No vitamin C for you.
00:06:00.000 Several days later.
00:06:02.000 One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.
00:06:06.000 Eight. Eight players. Makes the pot 16,000 away.
00:06:11.000 Alex, you can gamble your way out of trouble.
00:06:14.000 Alex, I hope you brought enough cigarettes.
00:06:21.000 You're gonna need them. I have some facts.
00:06:23.000 Alright, calm the nerves.
00:06:26.000 Calm the nerves.
00:06:27.000 Calm the nerves.
00:06:28.000 Alex, sit down Alex.
00:06:32.000 I wanna, I wanna go.
00:06:34.000 He's in debt.
00:06:37.000 Alex is in debt so he's trying not to play.
00:06:39.000 Or we make him play.
00:06:40.000 Get him deeper in debt.
00:06:44.000 Are we the best friends or the worst friends?
00:06:46.000 Best. We're back at it my friend.
00:06:50.000 I'm about to take all your money.
00:06:52.000 Bailey. Can I hate you?
00:07:01.000 You're really gonna hate me after tonight.
00:07:02.000 But if you hate me now, you're gonna despise me after I clean the f***ing table.
00:07:09.000 See ya, young man.
00:07:11.000 See what you got.
00:07:13.000 Baby.
00:07:15.000 Can we have five Americanos, please?
00:07:17.000 100. Ooh, Yusuf, did you order tea?
00:07:22.000 And can I have whatever tea that he got, please?
00:07:25.000 Two of us left. It's gonna be a split call.
00:07:30.000 Poland.
00:07:32.000 Poland.
00:07:34.000 What did he ask?
00:07:41.000 Bro, I call. I call.
00:07:42.000 It could be a split pot.
00:07:45.000 Oh shit.
00:07:48.000 Full house with aces.
00:07:54.000 Sit! Marcel! Oh shit!
00:07:58.000 Bro, I just told you.
00:08:00.000 He told that. I just told you.
00:08:01.000 Bro, I just told him a story.
00:08:03.000 So, like, the math teacher...
00:08:05.000 Is it the story?
00:08:06.000 Is it the story when you lost?
00:08:08.000 No, no, no. We don't ask the loser.
00:08:10.000 No, sorry. We don't talk to loser.
00:08:12.000 Get off the table. He folded.
00:08:13.000 Somebody had six and made quads.
00:08:15.000 But he folded before.
00:08:16.000 I didn't fold it. Marcel, that was ice cold.
00:08:19.000 Marcel. Three people.
00:08:27.000 Everyone thinks they got something. So now when you have something, you're like, three good hands.
00:08:33.000 Then I am the top G. And you know what?
00:08:36.000 Sometimes in life, you gotta let people know Why you have the name you have.
00:08:42.000 I actually aren't in prison.
00:08:43.000 I'm serving three life sentences.
00:08:45.000 Three life sentences, just me by myself, solitary.
00:08:49.000 Sentence Commissioner, I'll play you a poker with no cards.
00:08:53.000 And if I win, you have to let me out.
00:08:56.000 Here I sit. So when these three people think they can go all in against the top G, Let's go!
00:09:05.000 Mmm! I am so ready for this!
00:09:08.000 Raise me! Oh! I'm down!
00:09:10.000 I'm down! Let's go, you fucking little dickhead!
00:09:13.000 Oh, yes! Feels so good!
00:09:14.000 Yeah, 400! Mmm!
00:09:16.000 Mmm! Yes!
00:09:18.000 Oh, my God! You see what you got?
00:09:20.000 Fucking... Pair of fours!
00:09:21.000 Pair of fucking jacks, you fucking dork!
00:09:23.000 Give me the fucking money! You fucking little jerk-off!
00:09:26.000 Right here, Yousef! Right here, buddy!
00:09:28.000 Hey! Yousef! Hey!
00:09:30.000 Yousef! Hey! Bro!
00:09:31.000 Right here! Right here!
00:09:33.000 Hey! Bro! Right here!
00:09:34.000 Told you. Fucking cuckold.
00:09:37.000 Fucking dork.
00:09:38.000 Fucking loser. Can't sexually satisfy your girlfriend or Marcel's mom.
00:09:44.000 You, my friend, are the worst man that humanity has ever spawned for the entirety of its existence.
00:09:51.000 I'm gonna bet because I think maybe he'll fall out fucking fold!
00:09:55.000 I'm so fucking rich I don't care!
00:09:58.000 You fucking nobody.
00:10:00.000 You're a dork. You, my friend, should be ashamed of yourself!
00:10:10.000 It's right here, buddy. Now's your time.
00:10:12.000 Now's your time to beat me. Now's your time.
00:10:14.000 Youssef, it's your chance. Now's your chance.
00:10:16.000 Right here, buddy. Bro, it's right here.
00:10:18.000 I'm all in. I'm all in.
00:10:19.000 It's right here. Youssef, it's me and you.
00:10:21.000 Right here. Two dicks, one shaft.
00:10:23.000 Someone's going in. Someone's making love.
00:10:25.000 Someone's getting that baby. Let's go.
00:10:28.000 Youssef, look, look, I don't know what you got, but it's your chance.
00:10:31.000 I don't even know what I've got. Youssef.
00:10:33.000 All right, all in. All in.
00:10:34.000 All in. All in.
00:10:36.000 All in. All in. Oh, shit.
00:10:37.000 So, youssef, it's me and you. So, do it to me.
00:10:39.000 Do it to me back. Me and you, buddy.
00:10:41.000 Me and you.
00:10:42.000 Me and you. Showdown.
00:10:47.000 No way! I'm out.
00:10:53.000 Last card. Told ya, bro!
00:11:01.000 It was me and you. It was me and you.
00:11:03.000 It was you and me.
00:11:04.000 It was buddy. That was it.
00:11:06.000 It was us. Me and you.
00:11:08.000 Told ya. He's dumb fucked up.
00:11:11.000 He fucked with the wrong man. He tried to play with the drunk man with the sober man's wine.
00:11:16.000 Mmmmm! Ooh, the sweet taste of victory.
00:11:20.000 It's wild, isn't it?
00:11:22.000 How do you feel? How do you feel?
00:11:28.000 Bro, it was just me and you.
00:11:31.000 Are you still in?
00:11:32.000 I don't know who you are.
00:11:33.000 Because I was all in. And you, my friend, are a fucking stupid, dickhead, loser, nobody, who everybody hates.
00:11:41.000 And I always knew that. Oh shit!
00:11:43.000 Oh, Tristan's a wild guy!
00:11:45.000 He bets on nothing! Oh shit!
00:11:47.000 Trip Kings! Out of nowhere!
00:11:49.000 Out of nowhere! Shit!
00:11:53.000 That must... Yusuf, buddy!
00:11:55.000 Right here, bro. Right here, buddy.
00:12:01.000 A6. Right here, buddy.
00:12:07.000 Right here.
00:12:09.000 Yusuf. Yusuf's gonna get it.
00:12:11.000 Your crucifixion is gonna end.
00:12:12.000 How can I get it? You might get a six.
00:12:18.000 Hang on. I went to Jack.
00:12:26.000 Yusuf. Right here, buddy.
00:12:28.000 Respect. Respect. I gave you shit all night.
00:12:31.000 Respect. I do actually like you.
00:12:33.000 I'm gonna stop giving you shit. But for one last time.
00:12:36.000 Right here, buddy. Told you.
00:12:38.000 I'm right here. I'm right here.
00:12:42.000 And you done fucked up.
00:12:43.000 Trying to play like a drunk man in a sober man's game.
00:12:47.000 You done fucked up. So, baby!
00:12:50.000 It's me and you bro. I told you when the drinks start flowing, the cards start showing.
00:12:57.000 It's true. It's true.
00:12:59.000 I'm a feminist, as you all know, and I really respect the opinions of women.
00:13:15.000 And that's why I'm here in this woman's only gym, to ask them what they think about my brand new product, Fireblood.
00:13:21.000 People often come up to me and say, Andrew, you're so tall and strong and smart and funny and charismatic and extremely rich, what supplements do you take?
00:13:29.000 And I explain that coffee and cigars are the only supplements I've ever needed, but perhaps as I get old I should look into them.
00:13:35.000 So I decided to do a little bit of market research and I was very disappointed by what I saw.
00:13:39.000 All of these supplements are full of chemicals I can't name.
00:13:42.000 I don't know what they are. Or they're full of flavorings.
00:13:45.000 I thought, why can't you have a product which is only the things your body needs?
00:13:50.000 Why can't you only have vitamins and minerals and amino acids?
00:13:54.000 And if you're going to do that, why not have loads of them?
00:13:57.000 I've never understood, girls if you don't mind, I've never understood why you would have 100% of your vitamin B2 when you can have 7,692% of your vitamin B2. Along with your vitamin B6 and your iodine, magnesium, zinc, copper, all the amino acids, niacin, folic acid, vitamin A, it goes on and on in one convenient scoop with absolutely no flavorings whatsoever.
00:14:24.000 Surely, Andrew, you're a business genius.
00:14:27.000 Why? Who hasn't thought of taking all the minerals and all the vitamins and all the amino acids and putting them in a fantastic, easy-to-use product with no flavorings whatsoever?
00:14:36.000 So I've created it, Fireblood, and we're here to see what women think of it at this Girls Only Gym.
00:14:41.000 So, girls, this is Fireblood.
00:14:43.000 This is my product. Please give us a very honest review.
00:14:48.000 Girls love it. They love it.
00:14:51.000 Don't listen to what girls say.
00:14:53.000 They don't mean it. They love it.
00:14:55.000 And that's the best thing about fire blood because you know what?
00:14:57.000 Life is pain. Everything good in life is going to be pain.
00:15:00.000 When you go to the gym, you're supposed to suffer.
00:15:02.000 Every single good thing that's going to come to you in life is going to come through pain.
00:15:05.000 Your supplement, what is good for your body, is never going to taste like cookie crumble.
00:15:09.000 It's never going to taste like strawberry cotton candy.
00:15:12.000 And if that's what you want, you are probably gay.
00:15:15.000 If you are a man and you want to be as strong as humanly possible with no garbage, only the things your body needs, then you need to get used to pain and you need to get used to suffering.
00:15:23.000 And only that way will you ever become a fraction of my power and manage to achieve fireblood.
00:15:31.000 Fireblood tastes disgusting because it is good for you and like everything beneficial in life that is hard to swallow.
00:15:34.000 Fireblood is the most disgusting product you can buy but contains every vitamin, mineral, and amino acid required for muscle growth.
00:15:38.000 Your stomach may ache a little bit after consuming fireblood if you are a dork.
00:15:40.000 If you prefer supplements which taste of cookie crumble but are full of junk, you should probably get an AIDS test because you are gay.
00:15:45.000 It's not good at all.
00:15:46.000 It's very disgusting. I really feel to throw up when I'm drinking.