Tate Speech - August 19, 2024


Speaking to Sharks | Tate Confidential Ep 251


Episode Stats

Length

11 minutes

Words per Minute

149.68889

Word Count

1,684

Sentence Count

220

Misogynist Sentences

1

Hate Speech Sentences

4


Summary

Tristan and Andrew are at a beach festival in Romania, and they don t want to go to the beach. So they go to a restaurant and have a debate about whether or not they should go swimming in the ocean. And it turns out, it s not as simple as it looks... it s actually really hard to swim on the Black Sea. Listen in to find out who s going and who s not! Also, if you don t know what a shark is, then you re in for a real treat, because it s one of the ugliest beaches in the entire world, and anyone who wants to swim there is mentally retarded and needs to learn how to swim, because they re going to die at sea. And if you can t swim, you re not going to make it to sea, which is a good thing since it s the most beautiful beach in the whole world, right? Enjoy the episode, and don t forget to subscribe to the podcast on Apple Podcasts and leave us a rating and review on iTunes if you like what you ve listened to this episode. We ll see you next week! xoxo, Andrew and Andrew <3 - The Duke and Lady Gaga Logo by Courtney DeKorte Music by Ian Dorsch Music by Jeff Kaale ( ) Artwork by Ian McKellen ( ) and Mark Phillips ( ) Additional Compositions by Mark Phillips and Bobby Lord ( ) Music by John Chamberlain ( ) is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution license (credited to the music used in this episode of this episode was produced by the music is by the creator of the music was used in the music by the song "I'm Too Effing Goodbye" by the artist is a copyright of this piece by the composer and is a registered composer and the original score is copyright of the song was used on this episode's own work is copyright by the original music is credited to the artist and is owned by the musician and the composer is a client of the composer, . by the producer is a third person and the other person is in this song written and produced in this piece was not in any credit is not copyrighted to any other person's work. . Thank you for the original work is not being used in any other credit, credit is owned in any way or any other compensation is credit given to the composer's credit.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 Where's everyone going?
00:00:11.000 Oh, didn't we tell you?
00:00:14.000 Probably in Budapest for two days.
00:00:16.000 Yeah, we must have not told you on purpose so you don't come or go to the beach.
00:00:20.000 I guess we must have accidentally sat around and accidentally decided to not tell you that we're all going to the beach, the Black Sea, because there's a festival there.
00:00:27.000 And we thought, fuck that four-eyed cracker.
00:00:31.000 Are we doing it for Kristen's birthday?
00:00:33.000 Why are you saying we? We?
00:00:35.000 You ain't going nowhere. Where's your time?
00:00:38.000 I'm completely unprepared.
00:00:40.000 Have a nice fucking weekend.
00:00:42.000 I'll see you when you get back.
00:00:45.000 Bye, Andrew. Oh, long time no see. You ain't getting rid of me.
00:01:30.000 You ain't getting rid of me.
00:01:31.000 You said I'm not invited.
00:01:33.000 Well, look where I am. I'm right here.
00:01:35.000 You're a four-eyed cracker.
00:01:37.000 Nice to change. I'm not disagreeing with that, but I'm here.
00:01:42.000 Gee whiz, Bailey's arrived.
00:01:44.000 Golly gosh. I better listen up.
00:01:47.000 Isn't that right, bucko? Nice to see you, Andrew.
00:01:53.000 Oh my gosh, it's Tristan Tate.
00:01:55.000 What the fuck are you doing here? You work for the paparazzi?
00:01:57.000 You work for the BBC? Can I get a picture?
00:01:58.000 Get out of my face. I'll knock your bitch ass out.
00:02:04.000 We're at the beach. We're wearing mountain boots.
00:02:06.000 Kristen, you're gonna get some hiking in today.
00:02:11.000 Some good old-fashioned hiking.
00:02:12.000 Yeah, I think so. Yeah?
00:02:15.000 Oh, f***. Blinding.
00:02:18.000 Nice. I'm going to stare right at the laser.
00:02:20.000 You can't be trusted with the laser.
00:02:22.000 Why do you have a laser? I don't know.
00:02:23.000 I found it on the chair. Did you?
00:02:25.000 He's trying to point it out.
00:02:26.000 No. What are you talking about?
00:02:30.000 Alright, I'm immature. Nice.
00:02:37.000 You got some fans. Tristan, we have a beautiful beach.
00:02:41.000 Let me make sure everyone can see the beach.
00:02:43.000 We've been sitting here in this little restaurant for hours on end.
00:02:47.000 The Romanian beach is not beautiful.
00:02:48.000 The Black Sea in Romania is one of the ugliest beaches in the world.
00:02:51.000 Anyone who wants to swim there is mentally retarded.
00:02:53.000 Tristan, I want to go swim.
00:02:55.000 See ya. Do you want to come get in the ocean with me?
00:02:57.000 No. No? Have fun.
00:02:59.000 You'd rather just sit at this table on your phone all day long?
00:03:02.000 Yeah. Why? I'm wearing my hiking boots.
00:03:05.000 We can do this in Bucharest.
00:03:08.000 Win in Mamaya. We need to go to the beach.
00:03:11.000 Alright. Let's have a vote.
00:03:13.000 There's three black men, one brown man, and one white man at the table.
00:03:16.000 Who wants to go swim in the ocean?
00:03:18.000 No way. No way, Marcel wants to go swim in the ocean.
00:03:22.000 Let's go. Marcel doesn't know how to swim.
00:03:24.000 He's voting for his own suicide.
00:03:27.000 Marcel, you can't swim.
00:03:29.000 Bro, go swim to sea. Can you be...
00:03:32.000 I can swim further than you need to sea.
00:03:36.000 For sure. Marcel, I'm down for this.
00:03:38.000 Marcel. I can swim further out than you can.
00:03:41.000 No, because I'll do it to watch you drown.
00:03:45.000 Marcel, I know you can't swim.
00:03:46.000 Yeah, I can't swim. I'd do it.
00:03:50.000 I don't like oceans. I'd swim fucking 200 feet out and back.
00:03:54.000 I'd do it to get you.
00:03:56.000 To watch you die.
00:03:59.000 That's true. I'm not going to say that might be too far.
00:04:03.000 That's a very Marcel way to die.
00:04:06.000 That's a swimming contest when he can't swim.
00:04:08.000 No one would be shocked.
00:04:10.000 His last words. Can you beat me?
00:04:16.000 Let me explain something to you.
00:04:17.000 Everyone's like, oh, there's sharks in the Black Sea.
00:04:19.000 Oh, sharks don't attack people here.
00:04:21.000 You do realize that the Black Sea is connected to all the oceans and seas, you see?
00:04:28.000 People be like, lakes are different.
00:04:29.000 Lake is an independent thing, right?
00:04:31.000 So there's monsters in lakes, obviously, but not sharks.
00:04:35.000 So what people don't understand is they're like, oh, the Black Sea, there's no sharks.
00:04:38.000 If I could, with unlimited energy, swim from here to the Caribbean, Did the shark, are there like off-limits?
00:04:47.000 Are there like shark bouncers telling them not to come in this ocean?
00:04:50.000 Could a shark come here if he wanted to?
00:04:52.000 Yes. That means there are sharks.
00:04:54.000 If you jump in this water, you are touching water molecules which are touching water molecules which are touching water molecules which are touching a shark.
00:05:02.000 Somewhere! The Red Sea, the Caribbean, the Pacific Ocean, Australia, all the places there are sharks.
00:05:09.000 That's it. Where in a specific ocean would a shark be?
00:05:16.000 Where would a shark be?
00:05:17.000 Could be here.
00:05:18.000 Could be here. I don't know.
00:05:21.000 I didn't talk to all the motherfucking sharks, but there could be one up here.
00:05:25.000 A shark could very easily have swam here, and I don't know.
00:05:29.000 There's no roadblocks, there's no dams, there's no fucking no-go zones.
00:05:33.000 A shark could get here if it wanted to.
00:05:36.000 It's hot enough. They could swim here if they wanted to.
00:05:39.000 Therefore, there are sharks in that water by my logic.
00:05:43.000 What about the whale bouncers?
00:05:45.000 Marcel, you look like a bad man with that ice cream.
00:05:47.000 Say something else, say something fucking else.
00:05:50.000 Hahahaha.
00:05:52.000 Do what I should man, do what I could man, do what I should man, do what I could man,
00:06:04.000 do what I should man, do what I should man.
00:06:09.000 Alex the man decided to take his Ferrari out for once.
00:06:12.000 What's up Alex the man?
00:06:14.000 All good, Billy. I'm fantastic.
00:06:15.000 It's nice to see you. Welcome to the Black Sea.
00:06:21.000 Where magic will happen.
00:06:24.000 Tonight, of course. I'll be honest, I'm kind of underwhelmed so far.
00:06:29.000 Billy, you didn't say nothing.
00:06:33.000 Tonight is the real deal.
00:06:35.000 Because we will go with all these supercars.
00:06:39.000 And we will have fun.
00:06:41.000 Loads of fun. Alex, I'm holding you to it.
00:06:44.000 I know Andrew is mad at me because I brought him here.
00:06:47.000 I know that. You've been insisting on coming to the sea for ages.
00:06:51.000 But you know what?
00:06:52.000 I was thinking about you, babe.
00:06:54.000 Oh, thanks, Alex. Because I know that you never saw the Black Sea.
00:06:59.000 I'm ready. And I want to put this in your portfolio.
00:07:03.000 Thanks. Are we going to go jump in the sea later?
00:07:06.000 Tomorrow? Tomorrow. Alright, deal.
00:07:08.000 Deal. Deal. Nice.
00:07:10.000 I said I'm going.
00:07:16.000 You riding with me? Andrew's taking forever.
00:07:18.000 He said be down here at 10 what time is it?
00:07:19.000 Fuck Andrew. What time is it?
00:07:21.000 10.06. So Andrew's six minutes late and you can't be bothered to wait one more minute.
00:07:26.000 Marcel's late is right. Sorry.
00:07:30.000 Who is damaging the black stereotype worldwide by being late?
00:07:34.000 And who was actually on time today? You were on time.
00:07:36.000 No, Marcel was on time. No, sorry, Marcel's not on time.
00:07:39.000 Yeah, exactly. I was on time.
00:07:41.000 He is on time. Marcel is late again.
00:07:44.000 Marcel's the black man who's always late, and he blames Nigel for the problem.
00:07:47.000 So, let's get out of here?
00:07:49.000 Yeah, let's get out of here. Do what I should name.
00:07:52.000 Do what I could name.
00:07:54.000 Do what I should name. Do what I could name. Do what I should name.
00:07:56.000 Do what I should name.
00:07:57.000 I ain't never ever said baby, ain't do no wrong I can paint a bird for you, but why no right from wrong?
00:08:23.000 Cause I wanna make it, boom, a million dollars baby So much fun, oh my gosh
00:08:31.000 Andrew, this is like Boop-A-Rat, but with sand And they have water.
00:08:37.000 It's amazing. I love it.
00:08:39.000 I like the way you kiss me. I can tell you miss me. I can tell it is, is, is, is.
00:08:46.000 Not trying to be romantic. I'll hit it from the back just so you don't get attached.
00:08:51.000 I like the way you kiss me.
00:08:54.000 I can tell you miss me.
00:08:56.000 I can tell you this, this, this, this.
00:08:58.000 I try to be romantic.
00:09:00.000 I hate it from the back.
00:09:01.000 You don't get a test.
00:09:04.000 You bite my lip.
00:09:06.000 Just want the taste.
00:09:07.000 You're on your knees.
00:09:09.000 I'm on the case.
00:09:10.000 You take the heat and research grace.
00:09:13.000 You say, well, don't go for your steps.
00:09:16.000 I said you're scared I'll let you down.
00:09:19.000 I'll stick around and you'll find out.
00:09:22.000 Don't you wanna make me proud?
00:09:25.000 Cause I'm so proud Baby, I'm so proud of you My life changed.
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