Tate Speech - September 14, 2022


TATE GETS ARRESTED IN THE MOUNTAINS | Tate Confidential Ep 156


Episode Stats

Length

18 minutes

Words per Minute

119.02965

Word Count

2,208

Sentence Count

344

Misogynist Sentences

5

Hate Speech Sentences

2


Summary

Tristan and Rory are on a road trip and they need to get to the Irish pub to get a present for Marcel, but it's not an Irish pub, it's a French pub, and the French are after them again, but this time they got us again, and we're not going to let them get to us this time, we're going to get revenge on them! In the meantime, Rory and Tristan are trying to figure out if eggs are real or not, but they can't seem to come up with a solid plan because they don't know what they're doing, and they're not even doing it the right way. We'll find out soon enough, but for now, listen to this episode of the podcast to find out what happens when they try to find a plan to get back to the French pub and get revenge against the French. Enjoy, and spread the word to your friends and family about this podcast! XOXO, EJ & Rory xoxo - The EGGS' Podcasting Team The Eggs' Podcast is a podcast where we talk about everything and anything going on in the world and try to make it as funny as possible. We hope you enjoy it as much as we enjoyed making it and can't wait to do it again next week! - EJ and Rory - The Egg's Podcast! xoxoxo, Ej & Rory - This episode was brought to you by the EGG'S Podcast. Thank you so much for listening to this podcast, we really appreciate your support and support us. We really appreciate it. We're working hard on this podcast. We can't thank you. We appreciate all the support us, we appreciate you, we can't do it. -EJ and we really do appreciate you. -Merry Christmas, Rory xxx -P.S. -Rory xxx - Ej and EJ XO -The EGG's Podcast. -The Egg's Aren't Real? - Justin xo - P.A. xOXO - - JUICY XOXOXO . -BRAKEVY -JOSH & EJ - JOSH - JORDAN XO - JOSHA - JAMIE - JEAN - JACOB - JERRY XORA - JAMES - JARRELL


Transcript

00:00:03.000 Why did you fucking shoot me?
00:00:06.000 Look. I had fucking dinner last night.
00:00:40.000 Fucking breakfast this morning.
00:00:42.000 Now I really want to have...
00:00:46.000 I don't know if I like you anymore.
00:00:52.000 I got you. Alright.
00:00:58.000 Tristan, what are you buying? Crossbows.
00:01:01.000 Why are you buying crossbows? To assassinate Marcel.
00:01:05.000 I bought you a present. Oh, thanks, mate.
00:01:09.000 Everywhere we go is an Irish pub.
00:01:12.000 Yeah, I think so, yeah.
00:01:14.000 Everywhere we go, we go bring that sign.
00:01:16.000 Exactly. Yeah, because everywhere is an Irish pub.
00:01:18.000 The hotel lobby, everywhere.
00:01:19.000 Yeah, exactly. Nice. We'll get some Guinnesses and drink in the Irish pub tonight, yeah?
00:01:23.000 Good. Why did you fucking shoot me?
00:01:28.000 Look, I was practicing.
00:01:31.000 I've got to assassinate Marcel.
00:01:33.000 I'm sick of him. So you went and bought crossbows and swords?
00:01:37.000 Yeah. The crossbow to get him, and if he wants to fight afterwards...
00:01:43.000 Yeah. Wood would hurt.
00:01:44.000 That would hurt as well. Yeah.
00:01:47.000 Actually, I could probably kill some of these if I really wanted to.
00:01:51.000 Up through their head.
00:01:53.000 Yeah. I think that's the move, isn't it?
00:01:55.000 We sharpen the wood, and then we stick it straight into Marcel.
00:01:59.000 yeah i'll use the crossbar on luke uh
00:02:23.000 so the french are after us again They got us again, Morse.
00:02:51.000 Round two. Round two, bro.
00:02:53.000 Round two.
00:02:55.000 But to be fair, we weren't even speeding.
00:02:59.000 So, round two. Tristan, what are you doing?
00:03:04.000 Can't you see what I'm doing? Well, yeah, I can see what you're doing, but that's...
00:03:07.000 You can't... You can't shoot me now.
00:03:10.000 You can't sharpen the fucking dagger and shoot it off the crossbow.
00:03:13.000 There was a cork on it for that reason.
00:03:19.000 All right, you can't shoot me now.
00:03:21.000 Now we're talking. Don't say that.
00:03:25.000 Do you admit it?
00:03:28.000 Admit... Alright, I admit it.
00:03:30.000 I admit everything.
00:03:31.000 Don't shoot me with that.
00:03:34.000 What's up? Why is that there?
00:03:37.000 What? That sign.
00:03:39.000 You coming in? What do you mean coming in?
00:03:41.000 We're at the bar. He is actually Irish as well.
00:03:45.000 Yeah, he's Irish. I'm Irish.
00:03:48.000 You got the swords.
00:03:51.000 It's not an Irish pub. What do you mean?
00:03:52.000 I'm not talking to you anymore, Rory.
00:03:54.000 It is an Irish pub. It's weird.
00:04:05.000 They think we were speeding. It's weird.
00:04:08.000 It's super weird. I know.
00:04:10.000 It's weird. I don't know where they came up with it.
00:04:15.000 Wait a second.
00:04:18.000 Andrew might be fucking right. There might be no such thing as fucking eggs.
00:04:21.000 You tried to order me eggs on the menu and this is common.
00:04:23.000 And they're trying to pretend this is eggs?
00:04:26.000 I just don't believe it. It just doesn't make sense.
00:04:29.000 How can eggs be real?
00:04:31.000 Eggs ain't real, yeah? Okay.
00:04:34.000 We need to agree eggs ain't real so I can go.
00:04:37.000 Eggs aren't real. Okay, well.
00:04:40.000 Looks like we came to an agreement, my friend.
00:04:42.000 Thank you very much. One more minute.
00:04:46.000 We're there. We're done. Bro, he just signed on the dotted line.
00:04:48.000 Eggs ain't real. Yeah.
00:04:50.000 Bro. Bro.
00:04:52.000 You know what? We've been saying eggs for like...
00:04:54.000 Bro, big egg.
00:04:58.000 Cat dance.
00:05:10.000 That doesn't- But you can't do that.
00:05:13.000 I can't do that. I actually can't.
00:05:15.000 Ladies and gentlemen, I will admit I cannot do that.
00:05:17.000 You know who can though? Mr.
00:05:20.000 Goon? Because Mr.
00:05:21.000 Mr. Goon never fails.
00:05:35.000 So Justin's moving to France.
00:05:43.000 I'm moving to France. I fell in love.
00:05:44.000 Love. He's moving to France.
00:05:47.000 Baby! Did you see?
00:05:52.000 Did you get the picture of us in love? Yeah, I did get the picture.
00:05:54.000 I think she thought when I went to turn her around for the prom picture that I was going to stick my...
00:05:57.000 Yeah, yeah. She doesn't realize you're a classy dude.
00:06:00.000 Get the French and the English more straight away.
00:06:04.000 So you're moving to France? I'm moving to France.
00:06:05.000 I'm in love. I love you.
00:06:07.000 You're staying here. Look, she smiled.
00:06:08.000 Look how happy we are. It's true.
00:06:10.000 The happy couple. I'm going to break her heart.
00:06:14.000 Shit. You're leaving, aren't you?
00:06:16.000 I am leaving. As soon as this ticket gets paid, get the fuck out of here.
00:06:19.000 Damn. But in the meantime, my lives will fall in love.
00:06:23.000 By the way, Justin, did you know that this is because the eggs aren't real?
00:06:26.000 It's the egg conspiracy. Egg conspiracy.
00:06:28.000 It's a big egg. It's a big egg.
00:06:29.000 So you know eggs? Yeah, yeah, eggs.
00:06:32.000 Yeah, no, no, that's a psyop.
00:06:33.000 Eggs aren't real. Eggs aren't real, what do you mean?
00:06:34.000 They're not real, bro. They haven't been real.
00:06:36.000 You know every time you think you eat eggs.
00:06:39.000 Yeah, scrambled eggs? No, no, no.
00:06:41.000 No, no, no. What do you mean?
00:06:42.000 No, Justin, that's a psyop.
00:06:44.000 Eggs aren't real. Like the speed limit.
00:06:47.000 No, eggs aren't real.
00:06:49.000 The speed limits are real. I feel like there's an inside joke I don't know about.
00:06:52.000 It's not a joke. Eggs aren't real.
00:06:53.000 This is an egg conspiracy by Big A to get us to admit that eggs are real.
00:06:58.000 That's why they pull us over every single year in France.
00:07:00.000 It's because eggs aren't real.
00:07:02.000 And you'll learn that it's actually an international organization who's trying to sign up us all to believe eggs are real.
00:07:08.000 It's like the moon landing, but actually, eggs aren't real.
00:07:13.000 Okay, I understand. I don't understand why they would do this, but...
00:07:15.000 It's Big Egg, bro. Big Egg.
00:07:17.000 Ah, like Big Pharma, Big Egg.
00:07:19.000 Big Egg, bro. I see.
00:07:20.000 Way more powerful. Way more powerful.
00:07:22.000 Bro, think about it. They just organized this whole bit to get us caught.
00:07:26.000 They're giving us tickets trying to drain our resources so we can't spread the word that eggs aren't real.
00:07:32.000 Eggs aren't real. What's this egg shit about?
00:07:35.000 Big egg. He doesn't know about big egg.
00:07:36.000 I thought I did until about 30 seconds ago.
00:07:38.000 Eggs ain't real. Eggs ain't real, bro.
00:07:40.000 This whole time. Eggs ain't real, G. That's what this is all about.
00:07:46.000 Apparently eggs aren't real. No, that's what this is all about.
00:07:48.000 So I just told my new wife that we were going to start an egg farm.
00:07:51.000 Bro, that's what I mean. She's trying to get in deep.
00:07:53.000 Like, splinter cell. Ah, I see.
00:07:56.000 So blueberries, right? Basically blueberries.
00:07:58.000 Blueberries are real. Blueberries are real, but eggs are not real.
00:08:02.000 Sile. I see. Don't listen to it.
00:08:05.000 Don't listen to propaganda. Yeah, I'm really sad to hear this.
00:08:08.000 I can't believe you.
00:08:09.000 Don't listen to it.
00:08:11.000 I don't know.
00:08:21.000 So, Tristan blew a tyre.
00:08:45.000 Bye!
00:08:46.000 So him and Rory are out of the race.
00:08:48.000 And we just passed Andrew and Boris.
00:08:52.000 They got pulled over for speeding or some shit.
00:08:55.000 So you know what, Marcel?
00:08:57.000 I think this means we're in front.
00:09:00.000 I think it does. After like two days of following the completely wrong route, somehow I have miraculously taken the lead.
00:09:10.000 It was always meant to be destiny.
00:09:12.000 Clearly. Destiny calls.
00:09:15.000 City boys, we are.
00:09:16.000 Let's go Music playing
00:09:38.000 So I wonder what Tristan's doing.
00:10:07.000 You can't just do the dance.
00:10:10.000 you Tristan's car broke down. Now he's on the bus like a loser.
00:10:13.000 He probably is on the loser bus.
00:10:14.000 Look at this beauty. I know.
00:10:17.000 The universe makes Tristan what he deserves.
00:10:19.000 Exactly what he deserves. I'm Tristan.
00:10:21.000 I'm Tristan. We're all on the bus.
00:10:23.000 Loser bus. Loser bus.
00:10:24.000 Losers only. We're living the dream.
00:10:28.000 We are living the dream. Ketter Run's awesome.
00:10:30.000 Kind of run this off.
00:10:32.000 The Matrix is trying to convince me that eggs are real.
00:10:59.000 I hope we end up in this situation myself.
00:11:07.000 Oh Basically, we was winning. They called the police on us because they needed to catch up.
00:11:13.000 Trying to hold us down.
00:11:15.000 Look, and that's why Andrew got pulled over too.
00:11:18.000 Just trying to catch us. We've been miles, miles ahead of him.
00:11:23.000 All week. All week long.
00:11:26.000 Now look. And now look what happened to him.
00:11:27.000 This is what he got himself into.
00:11:32.000 Stash cops being right pricks.
00:11:36.000 Cheeky fuckers So, um, anything?
00:11:50.000 I feel like my life is just one never-ending interaction with different police officers.
00:12:19.000 You know? It is, isn't it?
00:12:20.000 Well, Mr. Tate, duh, duh, duh.
00:12:22.000 Fuck off. You're Spanish.
00:12:25.000 I'll give you a fine.
00:12:26.000 Fine. Bro, think I ain't got money?
00:12:28.000 Give me the fine. I don't care.
00:12:30.000 If I cared about the fine, I wouldn't be driving like that, would I? You dickhead.
00:12:34.000 Fucking hell. What's wrong with these people?
00:12:36.000 Imagine sitting there as a full-grown man and spending an hour writing out a piece of paper to try and make a millionaire pay 200 euros.
00:12:44.000 Do you have no honor? If I was him, I'd be like, you're too rich to even try to find.
00:12:49.000 Slow down. It would be nice.
00:12:51.000 Yeah. Please slow down.
00:12:52.000 Slow down, please. And I'd be like, you know what?
00:12:54.000 You're actually a nice guy. I'll slow down.
00:12:56.000 I would give you fighting and you will pay the price.
00:12:58.000 All right, G. Here's a 200-year-old.
00:13:01.000 Fuck off.
00:13:05.000 They don't realize, do they? John Law and the government, that little gang, I don't fear them.
00:13:12.000 The Lord High Job protects me.
00:13:14.000 I do whatever the fuck I want.
00:13:17.000 Every year, every fucking year.
00:13:19.000 That's the one I'm working on.
00:13:26.000 I'm gonna get it done.
00:13:46.000 Look at the glass.
00:13:49.000 Scorched. Fuck.
00:13:51.000 I literally dropped the gear.
00:13:53.000 Big boom. Flame came out of here next to my head.
00:13:57.000 Another flame came out of here.
00:13:59.000 Smoke everywhere. Got out.
00:14:01.000 There was a stream next to us.
00:14:02.000 We literally was chucking stream water on the car.
00:14:04.000 Nothing else to do.
00:14:06.000 Got the fire out.
00:14:08.000 And then I stripped it and fixed it and got it back on the road.
00:14:11.000 Wait, so it drives again? Yeah, it's back on the road, but I drove in.
00:14:14.000 I was stuck in the mountains for two and a half hours.
00:14:16.000 I rang Tom, and I was like, Tom.
00:14:18.000 He's a legend! He blew up, got stream water, took the fire out, put it back together, back on the road.
00:14:26.000 Look, this side window's scorched.
00:14:27.000 Look, I've cleaned most of it off, but the flame came out of there.
00:14:30.000 Alright, the fact he got back in and drove it means he is a legend.
00:14:32.000 Bro, I rang Tom. He's three hours away.
00:14:34.000 He's got Tristan's Bentley on the back.
00:14:36.000 What am I supposed to do? I've got no truck for me.
00:14:38.000 I had to fix it.
00:14:40.000 Yeah. Otherwise, you'd have stuck by the side of the road.
00:14:42.000 You'd have been super fucked, yeah. Mate, my highest went up in flames three days ago at home.
00:14:47.000 The whole fucking lot went.
00:14:48.000 And then I'm seeing flames right at the back of my vent door and I'm like, this can't be happening.
00:14:52.000 Are you fucking having a laugh?
00:14:54.000 Bro, your twin turbo Aventador project has been nothing but a fucking...
00:14:58.000 No, she's good. You can't say she's good.
00:15:03.000 And it spanked everybody on the trip so far.
00:15:05.000 There's no one that's going to touch that car at all, even with the problems it's got.
00:15:09.000 So yeah, that's the fastest until it blows up.
00:15:11.000 I sat in front of her on the floor, on the road, genuinely, and I went, listen, you'll be fucking a place of an SV, I'm telling you.
00:15:17.000 Like, you'll be gone, and you'll end up in Bradford or somewhere, and you'll be crying.
00:15:22.000 She knows now.
00:15:23.000 No one...
00:15:23.000 ...can stop me.
00:15:25.000 I'm not alone.
00:15:33.000 I the same way the brain and stay in the future for being tempted to be replaced on the rate of play So come for a make it rain turn up stay there
00:16:00.000 Both I'm so indecisive I'm going on crazy, but I think I like it more time. I lose my head for the latest. Just go to our surviving They've got time for a side shit. No way. That's my ride in my I
00:16:16.000 Don't know now Someone's getting fucked.
00:16:39.000 I guess.
00:16:41.000 Let's go see.
00:16:43.000 They came in hot, bro.
00:16:50.000 Yeah, they weren't fucking around.
00:16:54.000 Why are we always getting in trouble?
00:17:05.000 Racism against Americans.
00:17:06.000 Give me something. What is it?
00:17:09.000 Meat sticks. Meat sticks.
00:17:12.000 need like those.
00:17:14.000 Oh well.
00:17:19.000 So what we doing?
00:17:23.000 First of all we're not being poor.
00:17:27.000 We're not being poor, are we?
00:17:30.000 We're drinking.
00:17:32.000 You can't drink and drive, can you?
00:17:34.000 No, you can't drink and drive.
00:17:36.000 No, you can't drink and drive.
00:17:43.000 You can't drink when you drive. That's illegal.
00:17:45.000 When you hire a luxury V class transport because you're not poor.
00:17:49.000 We play PlayStation all day, then boo.
00:17:50.000 Drink as much as you like. Yep.
00:17:52.000 Get a pork rime, please. We need to look.
00:17:56.000 Oh, because we went grocery shopping.
00:17:59.000 Do you even have room in a Porsche to get groceries?
00:18:04.000 I'm pretty sure the Lamborghinis don't even have cup holes.
00:18:07.000 Oh, I have four.
00:18:12.000 How are they surviving?
00:18:15.000 Super car. I'm going to start a charity.
00:18:19.000 That hires out luxury V-classes for free for impoverished supercar owners.
00:18:23.000 Wow. That's a good business.
00:18:25.000 It's a charity. It's a charity.
00:18:27.000 Fuck it, huh? Let's get loads of them.
00:18:30.000 Yeah, we'll have to take big salaries.
00:18:32.000 For all the poor Lamborghini owners in the world.