Tate Speech - July 04, 2022


Tate on Ikea


Episode Stats

Length

3 minutes

Words per Minute

216.1769

Word Count

743

Sentence Count

64

Misogynist Sentences

5

Hate Speech Sentences

5


Summary

I hate going to IKEA. I don t want to go there. I m scared of heights, I m afraid of heights... but I m even more afraid of going to Ikea. It s a place that makes me feel empty and sad and soulless inside. It's a place where I don't want to be. I hate going there and I want to never go there again. I ve been in there before and I m here to tell you why. I can t stand it. I m sick of being dragged around by people who don t give a shit about the nuts you have in your home. I ve got a theory on how to get out of there and get the most out of your time in there. It s claustrophobic and makes me want to get lost in the maze. If you like Ikea, you re in the right place. You re not going to like it if you don t go in there and you re not here to get what you need. Get to the store and get your shit put together and you ll feel better than you ve ever felt before. Shout out to the people who make it work for you and make you feel better about your life. Support the channel: bit.ly/support-the-channel and support the channel today and get to the support channel today. Shoutout to ShoutOut to: for sponsoring the channel! to support the podcast and Shout to my good friend, . for making the podcast. for helping me raise awareness about the podcast and making it bigger and better for women everywhere. thank you for making it easier to reach more women everywhere and give them the best possible access to women everywhere they need it. Thank you all the love and support you can get. you re gonna get a better life, no matter where they can reach it, it s better than they can get it, they re not only through the best of it, and they re more than you can do it, thank you. - thank you, they can help me, I can help it, I love you, I will help them, they will help you, and I will support you, not only with the support me, they are helping me, more of them will help me more than that, and more, they ll help me with the rest of them, more than they know it, more people will be able to help me out.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 Not much on earth I'm afraid of. I'm afraid of heights and I thought that was it but I've
00:00:11.920 identified another fear of mine. I'm afraid of Ikea. I'm afraid of Ikea because there's something
00:00:19.120 about Ikea that gets in my brain and just makes me feel empty and sad and soulless inside. Last
00:00:28.480 time I went to Ikea my girlfriend woke me up in the middle of the night and goes you're talking
00:00:31.060 about Ikea in your sleep. This is the true story. I was like what? She goes you're talking about Ikea
00:00:37.000 saying you don't want to go to Ikea in my sleep. That's how much I don't want to go to Ikea.
00:00:43.480 She goes here and go why do you hate Ikea so much? The furniture is good. The furniture is good.
00:00:47.340 It's good quality and it's a good cost and I understand the whole Ikea concept. I see why
00:00:53.160 they're successful. I just don't want to go there. I don't want to go. I don't want to get lost
00:00:58.340 in the maze. I don't want to write down what I need. I don't want to find it afterwards and put
00:01:03.420 it on the tray. I don't want to try and get everything in the car when it doesn't fit.
00:01:06.940 I don't want to come home. I don't want to open flat pack furniture. No one wants to put flat pack
00:01:11.820 furniture together. No one wants. I don't want to fuck around looking for that screw that's never
00:01:15.280 there. I don't I don't want the whole experience. It's just negative to me. There's nothing about what I
00:01:21.680 enjoy and when I walk through Ikea you always see some fucking 34 year old six out of ten
00:01:28.180 who was hot when she was younger who spent all her years doing cocaine and getting banged by
00:01:32.260 someone else who's now married some beta male loser and he's walking around with her and she's like
00:01:36.900 do you like these curtains? What do you think of these curtains? And he's like yeah they're all right
00:01:40.840 and you see some dude some some unhappy guy being dragged around by his wife pretending he gives a
00:01:46.540 fuck about the nuts. He doesn't give a shit about the fucking bedside table. He doesn't care. He's
00:01:50.200 asleep. He doesn't care. You've taken this guy. He works five days a week fucking doing a job he hates
00:01:55.680 just to keep you in a house you fucking dumb bitch and on his day off you have to drag into
00:02:00.040 Ikea and force him to look at fucking bedside tables. He doesn't fucking care. He wants to
00:02:04.360 leave like I want to leave. There's no happy man in that place. It's bullshit. On top of that they
00:02:10.160 deliberately design it like a maze and it's done on purpose so you can't fucking get out. It's
00:02:15.860 claustrophobic. I'm fucking I'm in the middle of Ikea. I found the one thing I need and now I want to
00:02:21.340 leave. I'm a smart man. I need a fucking GPS on my fucking phone. Got to load up fucking Google
00:02:26.800 Maps to get the fuck out of the place. It's bullshit. I hate it. I fucking hate Ikea. Everything
00:02:31.720 about the experience pisses me off. Here's how I do Ikea. I tell my girlfriend go to Ikea and get
00:02:37.560 what you want. Find a handyman online and put it together. I'm busy. That's how Ikea is done. I don't
00:02:43.220 fucking step foot in that place ever because the last time I did I had genuine literal nightmares.
00:02:48.920 Take shinkai.net. The products on there every single one of them is absolutely top quality.
00:02:54.440 We have the PhD course which is guaranteed to change your perspective and change your dynamics
00:02:58.900 with women. If you want more women get the PhD course. My fitness program I don't go to the gym.
00:03:03.900 I stay in perfect condition with 30 minutes of exercise a day from home. The fitness program
00:03:08.240 allows you to stay in shape without messing around without driving to the gym in the comfort
00:03:12.180 of your own home 30 minutes a day. The chess program you need to understand why chess must be mastered
00:03:17.420 and if you don't understand watch the chess video. As for the t-shirts mugs everything
00:03:20.640 else there's nothing better than walking around with a tape t-shirt on everyone knows you're
00:03:23.500 not a bitch. Get to the store today and support the channel.