Tate on Worms
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
182.34753
Summary
This episode is about the insult of the week, "Worm" and why it's one of my favourite insults and why most of you should not be called a worm because you're not even a worm, you're a hermaphrodite and you don't even have a gender. You're just a bunch of pussies sitting in the dirt trying not to get eaten by an eagle. And if an eagle did come along, you couldn't even defend yourself because a worm has no claws. And you can't defend yourself against an eagle because you don t have a defensive mechanism. And that's why a worm is my favourite insult, because they don't do anything important. They don't have to do anything but be eaten by bigger, more important animals. And they can't see, so they just move around and try and hide. And then a bird eats them. And the only reason a worm survived evolution is because there needed to be some shit animal for important animals to eat. And most people live their lives as worms, and most people are useless. So I use that insult because you live worms' lives because you are a useless nobody. You ain't done shit, you ain't a loser, you are just a loser. And 99% of you are being consumed by people who are better than you and they just consume you. You may not understand it because you think you but you're still alive, so you must be a cog in the evolutionary machine to make sure that you continue to be used. You think you're better than them. You don't understand it? You're not, are you? You are a cog? You just don't know what you are, right? You don t understand what you're being used to be? You know what I mean? You can't be? And you're just here to be consumed by better things, you just keep getting better and better? You have no idea that you are not being used? You aren't being used by better people? You do not have a choice? You only get to be better than other people, you have to be a better you than them? And they are being used, you can only be used by other people? or you just have to make them better than they are. I don't get to choose what they do? I'm not allowed to have a good life, I can't have it all, I have to have it, I'm a loser?
Transcript
00:00:00.000
I call people worms a lot. People say, why did you choose that insult? Why do you call people
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worms? And it's very, very clear to me, at least, why I call people worms. One, because they are
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worms. And two, because a worm is a pointless creature. The only reason a worm exists is so
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that bigger, more important animals can eat something. They don't do anything. They can't
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see. They sit in the dirt, and they just move around in the dirt, and they try and hide a little
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bit, and then a bird eats them. The only reason worms survived evolution is because there needed
00:00:46.880
to be some shit animal for important animals to eat. Eagles need worms. And most people live their
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lives as worms. Most of you are worms. You don't do anything important. You're just living in your
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shit life, living in your little dirt, just sitting there wriggling, hoping an eagle doesn't come
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along to fuck you up. And if an eagle did come along, you couldn't even defend yourself. A worm has no
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claws. It can't, it hasn't even got, like a skunk can spray smelly piss or something. A worm has zero
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defensive mechanism. A worm is absolutely and utterly useless. So I use that insult because most of you
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live worms' lives. But secondly, I've never heard of a story of valor that involves a worm. Like in
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lots of animals, a lot of animals, people use animals as insults. They'll say you're a bitch,
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which is a female dog. I don't think a female dog is that insulting to be. I know female dogs.
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You can have a female police dog that will charge at bullets, or you can have a fire dog that will run
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in a burning building. I think the dog that killed that terrorist dude, Abu whoever, that was a girl,
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wasn't. That was a female dog. What's the wrong about being a female dog? A dog can do something.
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Being a female worm would be much worse. Are there even female worms? Are worms so shit that they don't
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even have genders? I'm about to do research in the middle of a Tate speech for the first time in my
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life. Do worms have genders? Earthworms are hermaphrodites. This is what I mean. They don't
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have genders. You're a worm. You're not even a man or a woman. You're just a worm. Like most of you
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dudes, you're all pussies. You're half women, half men, sitting wriggling in the dirt. You can't
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defend yourself. If I were to come and knock on your door and say, I've decided I have a sexual
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attraction to twos, so I'm taking your girlfriend. You could do very little about it because you're a
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worm. There's no stories of valor involving a worm. My life, if I were to tell my life story,
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it'd be full of bravery. I did this. I did that. I fought here. I went there. I did it. You have no
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stories of bravery. What did you do? You got drunk in Ibiza. That's your story of bravery. You ain't
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done shit. You're a fucking worm. You're a hermaphrodite. You're a loser. And that's why worm is my
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favorite insult because worms don't do shit but be consumed by those better than them. And 99% of you
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watching this are worms to those above you. You sit there and you watch the sports games and you make
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sports people rich and they just consume you. You may not understand it because you're still
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breathing. You think you're not being destroyed, but you are. You're being used. You're a cog in the
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evolutionary machine to make sure that better things, better animals, better creatures continue
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to prosper because you're a fucking nobody. The only other insult I like on the same level to worm
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is an insult a good friend of mine, Ivan Throne, uses. And that's churl. Because churl is a word that
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was used a long time ago and no one uses anymore. And a churl means a mean-spirited peasant.
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And mean-spirited peasant is also a great way to describe 99% of you. Churls. I was driving in
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Romania the other day. I was driving and I was in the Aston Martin and it has a custom exhaust and
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it's stupid loud. And some guy pulled up next to me and goes, oh, your car is broken or what?
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Like trying to make fun of me because my car is too loud. Bro, you're in a Dacia. I'm in an Aston Martin
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Vanquish S ultimate. You like, do you think you've beaten me? I just sat there and revved and
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made loads of noise. I wanted it loud. I paid money to have it loud. It's a six liter V12.
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He's a mean-spirited peasant. He's a poor little man. He's a churl and a worm. I never thought I'd
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end up researching this, the reproductive process of worms, but here we are. The sexual organs are
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located in segments nine to 15. As a result, segment 15 of one worm exudes sperm into segments
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nine and 10. What? This is what I mean. This is you dudes when you're jacking off the porn
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hub, exerting sperm from one segment to another segment coming all over your chest because
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you're fucking worms. If you want to stop being a worm, I can teach you. I have that much power.
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I am such a powerful being like God himself. I can come along and find a little worm and
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grow it into something better. I can turn you into a completely different animal, but
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it requires hard work and worms aren't very good at working hard. So if you are prepared
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to work hard, if you're watching this video, you say, Andrew, I understand everything you've
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said to me. I am a feather in the wind. I have no control over my own life. I sit in the
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dirt. I wait for something to happen to me. I go to a shit job. I can barely pay my bills.
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I'm a little worm. I'm waiting for someone to come along and kill me. I'm a loser. If
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you write to me and say, hi, Andrew, I accept I'm a worm and I want to improve myself, then
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there's an email address at the bottom of this video below, and I'm going to tell you
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exactly how you can stop being a worm. And one day, through years of continuous effort,
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if you dedicate all of your waking seconds to obeying me, you may be a tiny, tiny fraction
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I'm too busy in the morning. Ain't worried about you niggas hanging on me. You ain't got
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nothing better to do with your time. I don't shit watching my every move. Trying to watch
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everything I do. I ain't worried about you niggas. No, I ain't worried about you niggas.
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I don't get in the morning. Ain't worried about you niggas. You ain't got nothing better to do with