Tate Speech - December 19, 2023


Tate’s Thanksgiving Dinner | Tate Confidential Ep 202


Episode Stats

Length

13 minutes

Words per Minute

146.69145

Word Count

1,973

Sentence Count

271

Misogynist Sentences

3

Hate Speech Sentences

2


Summary

It's Thanksgiving, and we're having a big ol' ol' turkey dinner, but we're not having it because we don't know what it's called. We don't even know what Thanksgiving is, let alone that it's supposed to be a day to be thankful for what we have in our lives. But we do know that we're thankful for a lot of things, including our friends, family, and our friends' friends, and that's why we're celebrating the holiday season with a big old turkey dinner. We're joined by our good friend Andrew and his best friend and co-host, Tristan Tate, to discuss all the things they are thankful for. We also have a special guest on the show, and it's not what you think it is, but it's what we need to do to make it through the day. We hope you enjoy this episode and that it makes you think about what you're truly thankful for, because it really does make you thankful for all the little things you have in your life. Happy Thanksgiving, y'all! P.S. If you don't have a turkey, don't be mad at us for not having a Thanksgiving dinner. It's not because we didn't do it the way you THINK you should do it. We know it's a holiday, you know why you should have a big turkey. We know you're thankful you're not thankful for it. You're not because it's the day to celebrate the day you're being thankful for something you're grateful for it, right? and we know you should be thankful that you have a nice, yah know what we know that you do. . . . right? You're right, right?? . Thank you, right?! xoxo, Alex, Alex and Andrew, we love you, bye, bye. -Tristan, Andrew, bye! -Alex, Caitlyn, Elyssa, EJ, and Brandon, bye - EJ (and thanks for listening to us, bye <3, bye bye, Bye, bye Bye Bye, Bye Bye Bye. <3 -Eliot, Caitie, bye-bye, Bye bye, Love ya'! -Elliott, bye - Caitie & EJ. (Merry Christmas! -AJ & Brad, -Alyssa & Brad xx


Transcript

00:00:00.000 So we're actually having a Thanksgiving dinner.
00:00:02.000 It looks so, eh? I know you did this whole thing for me because I'm American, so I just want to say thank you.
00:00:17.000 Who's he? Hey, hey, hey.
00:00:21.000 Oh, sorry. Yeah, to be fair, it wasn't for either of you.
00:00:24.000 We hate you both. It was for Marcel.
00:00:30.000 That's true. Aw,
00:01:01.000 poor Alex. That's a big turkey.
00:01:06.000 T, we're in Romania. Why aren't we having a Thanksgiving dinner?
00:01:09.000 Most of these people don't even know what Thanksgiving is.
00:01:11.000 But you know, baby. I do.
00:01:14.000 Did you do this all for me?
00:01:16.000 Well, the thing is, I want to remind you of the typical American tradition for Thanksgiving.
00:01:21.000 Because if I have my way, you'll never see your family again.
00:01:26.000 Thanks, Steve. You're welcome.
00:01:28.000 What's your go-to Thanksgiving dish, I should say?
00:01:32.000 What letter does fish begin with?
00:01:35.000 F. So fuck off.
00:01:39.000 Okay. Andrew, I have a serious question.
00:01:42.000 It's Thanksgiving. What are you thankful for?
00:01:46.000 I really enjoy to eat my meal in peace.
00:01:49.000 I'll be left alone. I'll be hostile when I'm trying to eat with some camera.
00:01:53.000 That was his only Thanksgiving wish, and you spoiled it.
00:01:55.000 What are you thankful for, T? My mediocre cameraman.
00:02:00.000 Thanks, I'm thankful for you as well.
00:02:02.000 Just what I have here.
00:02:04.000 Espresso Martinis, yeah?
00:02:05.000 Espresso Martinis? No, Espresso Martinis.
00:02:08.000 It's a classic. Perfect, classic Martinis.
00:02:09.000 Thank you very much. I'm also thankful for this drink.
00:02:11.000 I'll take two of those. Alright!
00:02:13.000 And then about two for him, two for him, two for him.
00:02:15.000 And one for the lady.
00:02:18.000 Is that cranberry sauce? Yep.
00:02:20.000 I've actually never enjoyed cranberry sauce.
00:02:22.000 Who the fuck asked you your opinion on cranberry sauce?
00:02:25.000 Since when does the modern world, the world at large, ever wake up and think, I really want to know what Bailey Bolton thinks about cranberry sauce?
00:02:33.000 I don't think that conversation's ever been had.
00:02:34.000 I don't think anybody gives a solitary fuck whether you enjoy cranberry sauce or not.
00:02:38.000 Just don't put on your meal. Yes, I invented a new drink, and I told the barman to do his best.
00:02:42.000 It's called a palenka colada.
00:02:44.000 The idea of creamy, milky stuff and palenka makes me want to hear.
00:02:48.000 Look, I don't know what it tastes like. I made a joke about palenka coladas, and then I said to the barman, good luck.
00:02:53.000 There are only two men that are going to drink it anyway, so...
00:02:55.000 Yeah, I'm going to be... Right...
00:02:57.000 I'm not touching this shit. Take a shot off by the light.
00:02:59.000 You're out all this great. You know what?
00:03:01.000 If Bailey's out, I'm in.
00:03:03.000 If Bailey's out, I'm in. I'm in, always.
00:03:05.000 Alright, well then I'm out. Tate, how am I grasping at straws when there's one drink on the entire table and it's sitting in front of none other than Tristan Tate?
00:03:19.000 Yeah, you're accusing him of being one short.
00:03:21.000 That's terrible. Sorry, how many drinks on the table?
00:03:24.000 One. Are you sure?
00:03:26.000 Two? Alright, now there's two.
00:03:29.000 Where's yours? Now there's three.
00:03:32.000 Let me move this. Four.
00:03:34.000 Put them all right here, bro. All of them.
00:03:37.000 Five. Six.
00:03:41.000 All right, I might have messed up.
00:03:44.000 You just sealed your own fucking death warrant in wax.
00:03:49.000 You, my friend, are finished.
00:03:50.000 And I have more coming.
00:03:52.000 You have more coming. Yes, I do.
00:03:55.000 The Polygon Kalamazoo.
00:03:57.000 Marshall thinks you can't tell the difference between whiskeys.
00:03:59.000 I don't know if he's double buffed me or not, but I've actually mixed him up to the point where I don't know.
00:04:02.000 He doesn't know, because I mixed him up, so he doesn't know.
00:04:15.000 Yep.
00:04:16.000 you Then I'm pretty sure I can tell the difference.
00:04:20.000 One I can tell the difference a million percent immediately because keep in mind I'm a I'm a whiskey expert I'm a cigar expert I'm an expert of this and I know which one is which so now that I know which one is which and I know I mixed them up so you can't tell but I know you'd know Marcel believes that all whiskeys taste the same okay so what you're gonna do is Marcel you're gonna take a sip Of one glass, a bit of water, then the other glass.
00:04:46.000 Then you're gonna wait and take a sip of the other glass, a bit of water, and the other glass.
00:04:49.000 Do you understand? Yeah, and I have to say if I think it's different.
00:04:52.000 You have to tell which one is the more, the better whiskey.
00:04:55.000 Okay, cool.
00:04:56.000 Different, right?
00:05:11.000 Yeah, I feel like that's much better.
00:05:13.000 Okay.
00:05:14.000 Number one, number two, which one's which?
00:05:17.000 What do you think, Marcel?
00:05:19.000 One and two. One, two.
00:05:22.000 What is number one? Sorry to interrupt, but you have your palinka colada.
00:05:27.000 I'm going to bathe.
00:05:29.000 Who needs water?
00:05:39.000 Blue label, red label.
00:05:47.000 Easy. So, two is the best, one is the worst, yes?
00:05:50.000 Easy. So, yes, you agreed, you agreed, and I can confirm as a whiskey drinker that you're completely correct.
00:05:56.000 Blue Label and Red Label are different. So, well done, gentlemen.
00:05:59.000 But here's the thing, Marcel, they're not all the same.
00:06:01.000 And there we go, the co-arms.
00:06:03.000 Signature of Mr. Tape, yeah?
00:06:08.000 Yes, and...
00:06:10.000 If it's good, we put it in the menu.
00:06:13.000 Here's what we're going to do.
00:06:16.000 Is this the barman?
00:06:17.000 No, he's my colleague.
00:06:20.000 Your colleague is included in the service tip I gave you.
00:06:24.000 Here's what we're going to do. I'm going to have 250 lates to the barman as a tip before I try it.
00:06:28.000 And if it's good, I'm gonna give him another 250.
00:06:31.000 Alright. If it's average, I'm not gonna tip him anything.
00:06:35.000 And if it's really, really shit, I'll tip him 250.
00:06:37.000 Alright. For trying. Alright, let's see.
00:06:41.000 Palenka Colada. So what do I think of it?
00:06:46.000 Looks interesting. I'm not joking.
00:06:55.000 It's actually kind of good. Is it actually good?
00:06:57.000 Honestly, Palenka's may be the only drink.
00:07:00.000 With pineapple and shit, it somehow works.
00:07:02.000 That's not bad. Is it not?
00:07:04.000 Do you know what? It's Marcelle's, it's not bad.
00:07:06.000 Alright, here. I'm actually encouraged.
00:07:08.000 Let's go. Cheers. I'll tell you why it's a dangerous drink.
00:07:16.000 Because it actually is kind of nice and it will get you fucked up.
00:07:19.000 That's incredible. I'm not having another one.
00:07:22.000 Oh my gosh. You won't have another one.
00:07:24.000 I'll have another one. Marvin, what would I have to do for you to add Palenka Colada to the menu?
00:07:30.000 You just have to sign the menu so they know it's your signature.
00:07:33.000 I'm ready to do that. I will happily put my name behind the pickup.
00:07:36.000 Palenka Colada, designed by Tristan Tate.
00:07:39.000 Yeah. Oh, yeah? That's the real thing.
00:07:42.000 Yeah, she did it. I've had two.
00:07:45.000 You've had one. What did you say?
00:07:47.000 I've had one. Wait, wait, wait.
00:07:53.000 I've had what, three? I'll let you keep the championship.
00:07:59.000 Sorry, how many have you had again, baby? Tristan, what do you get the man who has it all?
00:08:19.000 No way! No way.
00:08:23.000 Those better be dress suits for suits.
00:08:27.000 Yes. What the fuck is that?
00:08:29.000 These are for you, Frank.
00:08:31.000 For me? Yeah. I've got Marcel a pair.
00:08:35.000 I think these are Marcel's size. I've got a pair for Marcel.
00:08:39.000 Oh my god. How much you left out?
00:08:41.000 I decided to get you a pair.
00:08:43.000 Tristan, you're not going to win this war.
00:08:47.000 So you may as well just give in and admit that it is the future of footwear.
00:08:56.000 Tristan, you've been beaten.
00:08:58.000 Tristan, put them on. Tristan, no.
00:09:00.000 Put them on. No, D. No.
00:09:05.000 Not the Crocs.
00:09:10.000 I'll get you. Don't worry, I'll order another foot.
00:09:13.000 We'll get him eventually. That's the other day of Crocs.
00:09:18.000 Never. Never ever.
00:09:20.000 Can't do it. Tristan wanted to try them on, so I turned the camera on.
00:09:23.000 He immediately retracts his statement.
00:09:25.000 I want them in the trash.
00:09:27.000 Why don't you take them in the trash? Shit.
00:09:33.000 That's where they belong. Also, Marcel.
00:09:35.000 Yeah.
00:09:36.000 Guess what?
00:09:37.000 What?
00:09:37.000 They got you some props.
00:09:44.000 Now Marcel, now is a very important moment in your life.
00:09:48.000 Where you have to decide between being white or being black.
00:09:51.000 Being a man or being a loser who wears a props.
00:09:54.000 So what you need to do, Marcel, is take those, like I did, and throw them in the trash.
00:10:00.000 Don't do it, Marcel. My parents, I threw them in the trash.
00:10:04.000 The person got them out.
00:10:06.000 Marcel, put them on.
00:10:08.000 And be a hero. And be a hero.
00:10:09.000 Don't do it. Marcel, you can't.
00:10:11.000 Put them on. Think how, listen.
00:10:14.000 Don't think I annoy Diane.
00:10:16.000 No. Yeah, exactly. If you don't wear them, I won't care that much.
00:10:20.000 But if you do wear them, Tristan won't care a lot.
00:10:22.000 Marcel, you can't- The people that does more annoy- You can't bring the unbalance to the household.
00:10:28.000 Right now, it's two losers against three or four not-losers.
00:10:31.000 You can't fuck it up.
00:10:34.000 But you would be pissed.
00:10:36.000 I'd be furious. Marcel, I'm not even going to lie.
00:10:39.000 I will be furious if you put this on your feet.
00:10:42.000 I swear to God, I will never forgive you.
00:10:45.000 Yes! Marcel!
00:10:48.000 No, no, no, don't do it.
00:10:49.000 This is crazy.
00:10:54.000 See? Tristan, it's a whole new experience.
00:10:57.000 The takeover continues.
00:10:59.000 Tristan. You're all retarded.
00:11:00.000 Wait, wait. Seriously, look how cool they are.
00:11:04.000 Shit. Marcel.
00:11:06.000 My man. You look super cool, bro.
00:11:08.000 You will never financially recover.
00:11:14.000 Tristan, this is crazy.
00:11:17.000 You have to get there.
00:11:18.000 10 out of 10 experience, right?
00:11:20.000 20 out of 10. Easy.
00:11:23.000 Tactical. I'm not used to that.
00:11:26.000 But they're actually comfortable now.
00:11:30.000 You've got to break them in.
00:11:32.000 Look how fast that is.
00:11:34.000 Look, look. Dang!
00:11:42.000 You definitely need some now.
00:11:44.000 He's like Sonic.
00:11:47.000 Basically Sonic.
00:11:49.000 Do you know a young man who is wasting his potential?
00:11:52.000 Smart, but plays too many video games?
00:11:54.000 Uninterested in school?
00:11:56.000 Hanging with the wrong crowd?
00:11:58.000 Give the gift that keeps on giving.
00:11:59.000 Give the gift of education.
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