Tate Speech - September 23, 2025


The World’s Best Shisha | Tate Confidential Ep 322


Episode Stats


Length

17 minutes

Words per minute

115.46512

Word count

1,986

Sentence count

288

Harmful content

Misogyny

5

sentences flagged

Toxicity

45

sentences flagged

Hate speech

8

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Tristan and Luke are on a trip to Turkey with their friend Andrew and his family when they get into a heated argument about poo poo. They also talk about a game of Uno and how they will never lose in the game.

Transcript

Transcripts from "Tate Speech" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 You thought you were a mountain of conquest. 0.99
00:00:02.000 You're actually a canyon of poop. 0.98
00:00:04.000 Swore to God, he swore his life. 0.99
00:00:06.000 Uno. 0.88
00:00:07.000 And now that I think about it, I think I always envisioned him as black.
00:00:10.000 Nobody knows but us how we roll, how we roll. 0.98
00:00:17.000 I think you're a mountain of conquest, but you're actually a canyon of poo-poo. 1.00
00:00:20.000 Poo.
00:00:21.000 There.
00:00:23.000 What girl a man says poo-poo? 0.97
00:00:27.000 I'm just saying.
00:00:28.000 I'm- Listen, I don't like what you are.
00:00:31.000 Nobody likes what you are.
00:00:32.000 I'm just pointing it out.
00:00:34.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:00:34.000 You're a canyon of poo-poo. 0.99
00:00:36.000 And you're never gonna beat me a smash. 0.99
00:00:38.000 Yeah.
00:00:39.000 You think you're a mountain of conquest.
00:00:40.000 What do you want to do?
00:00:42.000 I just pick up the controller, bro.
00:00:43.000 What do you want me to do? 1.00
00:00:44.000 I can't help but think you fucking suck. 1.00
00:00:46.000 Don't shoot the messenger. 1.00
00:00:47.000 There's no of man.
00:00:50.000 Bored in a jack.
00:00:51.000 Calling things poop.
00:00:54.000 It just isn't.
00:00:56.000 A mountain of poo poo isn't a thing.
00:01:00.000 Okay.
00:01:00.000 You thought you were a mountain of conquest.
00:01:03.000 But you're actually a canyon of poodle.
00:01:07.000 Why am I here?
00:01:09.000 You'll never recover financially.
00:01:11.000 We'll never recover financially.
00:01:30.000 Oh 279% left 2.
00:01:36.000 Yeah.
00:01:38.000 Where are we doing?
00:01:38.000 Where are we going?
00:01:40.000 Andrew decided to ask for the air conditioning to be turned off.
00:01:44.000 This is now the hottest plane in general.
00:01:46.000 Yeah, it's the uh excuse me. 1.00
00:01:49.000 My brother's very stupid. 1.00
00:01:50.000 Can you put the air conditioning back on? 1.00
00:01:52.000 Whoa! 0.71
00:01:53.000 We outvoted him.
00:01:57.000 You think you're a mountain of conquest. 0.94
00:02:00.000 But you're actually a canyon of poopo. 0.63
00:02:07.000 Thank you. 0.84
00:02:07.000 I hope it's cold in the canyon. 0.84
00:02:11.000 Why are we on a plane?
00:02:13.000 Run to Turkey. 0.84
00:02:14.000 Why?
00:02:15.000 See if we arrested.
00:02:18.000 What's in Turkey?
00:02:22.000 Well.
00:02:25.000 Turkish people.
00:02:26.000 Ice cream.
00:02:27.000 Okay, okay. 0.99
00:02:30.000 No shit. 1.00
00:02:31.000 Turkish delay. 1.00
00:02:32.000 Well you are American, so I thought you didn't know.
00:02:35.000 Why are we going to Turkey?
00:02:37.000 Well, I might be building a boat.
00:02:39.000 I don't want to go check on it.
00:02:41.000 So we're building a super yacht, so we have to go check out.
00:02:44.000 I might be building a super yacht.
00:02:46.000 Allegedly.
00:02:47.000 Allegedly on house arrest Tristan convinced me for us to build a super yacht.
00:02:52.000 Allegedly.
00:02:53.000 So we're gonna allegedly go look at it.
00:02:56.000 Because you have to break a champagne bottle over the hull.
00:02:59.000 Otherwise it's bad luck.
00:03:00.000 At the beginning, and we need luck. 1.00
00:03:02.000 Fuck yeah. 1.00
00:03:03.000 We need luck. 1.00
00:03:04.000 So I'll I'll risk getting arrested on land to have luck at sea.
00:03:07.000 That's fine.
00:03:08.000 I miss them.
00:03:09.000 What is the name of the uh I was thinking of calling it out, because it's gonna be very dark in color and it's shaped like this.
00:03:17.000 So it looks kinda like a knife.
00:03:19.000 Think about calling it the Marcel Mullings.
00:03:25.000 but never lost.
00:03:28.000 Real bad young.
00:03:30.000 Yardy.
00:03:34.000 How about it?
00:03:36.000 It's for you.
00:03:38.000 It's for you, friend.
00:03:41.000 Sure.
00:03:42.000 Yeah, don't worry about it.
00:03:45.000 It's a bit small.
00:03:47.000 I'm gonna be honest.
00:03:49.000 I'm used to bigger and better things.
00:03:51.000 It's a little bit small.
00:03:53.000 In his defense enter.
00:03:55.000 We float on really big jets, but we float on loads of smaller ones.
00:03:58.000 Marcel's only really float on big jets.
00:04:01.000 So why are you downgrading his lifestyle this way?
00:04:07.000 I'm gonna say my jets usually do think of it.
00:04:09.000 Hey.
00:04:10.000 You don't have it on the big jets.
00:04:12.000 Uno comes out, people lose.
00:04:15.000 I've never lost.
00:04:16.000 Some people lose.
00:04:19.000 I have never lost again.
00:04:21.000 You will never lost in the jet at Uno.
00:04:23.000 You lost in the jet.
00:04:24.000 So you didn't want one with a big table.
00:04:26.000 You will never beat the Uno.
00:04:28.000 You will never beat the Uno.
00:04:34.000 Puncio!
00:04:35.000 On my jet!
00:04:36.000 April 23rd, you lost on my jet!
00:04:40.000 My jet!
00:04:42.000 April 23rd, you lost it to me!
00:04:46.000 never you should put money out I've never lost a game of Uno.
00:04:56.000 In my entire life, I've never lost.
00:04:59.000 I swear on my best friend Marcel's good fortune.
00:05:03.000 I have never lost a game of Uno, ever.
00:05:05.000 I've never lost a game of Uno.
00:07:05.000 I'll find you in another world.
00:08:37.000 Luke, you got paid at least 15 to 20 million the last three months.
00:08:41.000 These are my favorite things.
00:08:43.000 Bailey, why?
00:08:45.000 why would I need more things new pouch no I like this pouch this is my favorite passage well back it's a little bit broken but I've decided because I keep breaking them so I have to keep buying new ones once I decide just to dash what's in the pouch I think uh the the world can never know that's that's classified information my pouch only has limited amount of space a yes car no daddy no I don't drive I retired on driving we already knew this we established like a big fat diamond shank no let's get loot A boat the same size as ours.
00:09:15.000 No, I don't need a boat.
00:09:16.000 And call it.
00:09:17.000 I can't I can't even say the Denini.
00:09:20.000 That's a good name.
00:09:22.000 It's a good name.
00:09:23.000 Hey, Blue.
00:09:24.000 Hey, and Blue.
00:09:25.000 Okay, okay.
00:09:26.000 But no thing.
00:09:26.000 Should we buy Luke a brand new outfit?
00:09:28.000 No.
00:09:28.000 What do you want us to buy?
00:09:30.000 Nothing.
00:09:30.000 You have to do it.
00:09:32.000 I don't need any.
00:09:32.000 Look, when I was your ages, my dream to come here and be able to get anything out.
00:09:35.000 Yeah.
00:09:35.000 I don't need anything.
00:09:36.000 Anything you want in the world.
00:09:38.000 Nothing.
00:09:39.000 If I want it, I'd have it.
00:09:41.000 I don't need it.
00:09:42.000 So you're gonna wear the same t-shirt and same jeans you've been wearing since the beginning of every single.
00:09:45.000 Maybe a new hat.
00:09:48.000 Maybe.
00:09:48.000 Okay.
00:09:49.000 Why look a new hat?
00:09:51.000 Maybe.
00:09:55.000 We're gonna go out.
00:10:04.000 In fact, I'm realizing every single time I travel, I need less and less.
00:10:07.000 I have to think.
00:10:08.000 Wait, what did I used to put in my bags?
00:10:10.000 I don't need this, don't need that.
00:10:15.000 Take him to the hat shop.
00:10:17.000 Yeah, but I want like a like touristy hat.
00:10:20.000 You know, like those tourist hats.
00:10:21.000 That'll be have a little logo of exactly where we are now.
00:10:25.000 We need to get him a ball.
00:10:26.000 No, a fancy hat.
00:10:27.000 It can't be fancy.
00:10:29.000 That's to be 10 euro max.
00:10:30.000 Hey, you said hat.
00:10:32.000 Yeah.
00:10:33.000 The most expensive hat and bottom.
00:10:35.000 No, you know, the most expensive hat and bottom.
00:10:38.000 *laughs*
00:10:41.000 thank you Best in the world.
00:10:49.000 The best in the world.
00:10:50.000 Surprise me.
00:10:50.000 Bring me three different flavors.
00:10:52.000 Three different flavors.
00:10:53.000 Surprise me.
00:10:54.000 Uh uh, do you want something fresh or sweet?
00:10:56.000 Surprise him.
00:10:57.000 Okay.
00:10:57.000 And uh answer it.
00:10:59.000 Do you want it classic one?
00:11:02.000 What's the special?
00:11:03.000 Is special one is uh like we have this flavor in the special.
00:11:06.000 Okay, okay, thank you.
00:11:08.000 How much is 15,000 Turkish?
00:11:09.000 What does that have?
00:11:10.000 What even is that?
00:11:10.000 It is um 400 or best in the world.
00:11:17.000 Best of the world.
00:11:17.000 So it's the best in the world, I actually have really high hopes because it's a super bold claim.
00:11:21.000 It is a big bill.
00:11:22.000 So tells it the guy who's been everywhere smoking shisha everywhere. 1.00
00:11:25.000 It's a very bold claim to say, wait, this shisha is the best in the world. 1.00
00:11:28.000 I mean, he basically put his life on the line.
00:11:30.000 Yeah.
00:11:31.000 Because someone has to pay for deception.
00:11:32.000 Obviously, I've been there before.
00:11:34.000 Say again. 0.87
00:11:35.000 I've been there before.
00:11:36.000 True.
00:11:36.000 You did do this about being a camera.
00:11:38.000 You can't lie.
00:11:39.000 Guys, you can't lie.
00:11:40.000 So now we have to decide on Waitley.
00:11:42.000 We said we're gonna give him exactly two years and 286 days for deciding.
00:11:46.000 He's not the best cameraman in the world, is he? 1.00
00:11:48.000 We should kill him. 1.00
00:11:50.000 What? 1.00
00:11:51.000 Daily gives us a few.
00:11:52.000 Bailey's original video.
00:11:53.000 I'm the best cameraman in the world try me out of luck.
00:11:56.000 Didn't us three agree that tonight was the night where we decide.
00:11:59.000 No, tonight was the night we decided if you're actually Luke's cousin.
00:12:03.000 And if I'm not. 0.98
00:12:04.000 Or if you're a liar.
00:12:06.000 Personally, I think he's been lying. 0.97
00:12:08.000 I'm an Italian club man who's wormed his way into your family.
00:12:11.000 What's your name?
00:12:12.000 Emilio Largo.
00:12:15.000 Emilio Largo's here.
00:12:16.000 I'm Darko Korean.
00:12:20.000 I'm Felix.
00:12:23.000 Felix Lyder.
00:12:24.000 No, you're Eugene Carmichael.
00:12:25.000 Isn't it Felix Light or black?
00:12:27.000 Lou.
00:12:27.000 No?
00:12:28.000 In the movies, but not in the books.
00:12:29.000 Ah.
00:12:30.000 In the books, he's a Texas.
00:12:31.000 He's American, American Texas.
00:12:33.000 Yeah, they did make him black.
00:12:35.000 Cowboy hats.
00:12:35.000 Yeah.
00:12:36.000 I remember him as blackers. 1.00
00:12:38.000 The movies got me.
00:12:39.000 They DEI'd it.
00:12:40.000 Yeah.
00:12:42.000 Yeah.
00:12:42.000 The disappointment on Tristan's.
00:12:43.000 I know.
00:12:44.000 I'm disappointed now.
00:12:45.000 I've listened to a lot of those books with Tristan.
00:12:47.000 A cardinal sins.
00:12:48.000 And now that I think about it, I think I always envisioned him as black. 0.64
00:12:51.000 Spying would have been so cool in the 50s. 1.00
00:12:53.000 Having a cigarette, being in the hotel lobby, the only good hotel in the city, seeing the other important people, hearing things, having a nice car, fucking the women that's single. 1.00
00:13:01.000 Now spying is being a fucking autistic retard. 1.00
00:13:04.000 Sitting in MI6HQ. 1.00
00:13:06.000 You're a diversity hire because you speak Hindi and you're sitting here as a little Indian, tapping into white people's accounts, seeing if they're mad that they lost their country.
00:13:17.000 He doesn't like the cutting ED.
00:13:20.000 For 35,000 pounds a year.
00:13:22.000 There's no James Bond. 0.91
00:13:23.000 Even spying's becoming gay. 0.98
00:13:25.000 There's nothing cool left at all. 1.00
00:13:27.000 Not a fucking this little James Bonds. 0.99
00:13:29.000 It's just, James, think of something Indian that rhymes with bond, dammit. 1.00
00:13:37.000 Make a fucking joke. 1.00
00:13:38.000 You are shit. 1.00
00:13:39.000 Why are you even in this shop? 1.00
00:13:40.000 Fucking useless. 1.00
00:13:42.000 Remember when Tristan thought there'd be no cats here in Turkey? 1.00
00:13:45.000 Oh yeah.
00:13:46.000 We didn't even feel it for take home at all.
00:13:48.000 Tristan will swore to God, he swore his life.
00:13:50.000 There'd be no cats in Turkey.
00:13:52.000 None.
00:13:53.000 I was there.
00:13:54.000 I was there.
00:13:55.000 That's how you remember it going now.
00:13:58.000 And now every single time I see a cat, I have to point it out.
00:14:01.000 Just to show to him how wrong he was.
00:14:05.000 That is true.
00:14:07.000 I swore on my life and every male member of my family's life.
00:14:11.000 That there were no cats in Turkey.
00:14:13.000 I did do that.
00:14:14.000 Bailey, all I said was, you know, I think there might be some cats in Turkey.
00:14:17.000 That's all I said.
00:14:18.000 That's out nowhere.
00:14:19.000 That's what you said.
00:14:20.000 Yes.
00:14:20.000 That's what I said.
00:14:21.000 That's what started it.
00:14:23.000 And then he started talking about how there's no cats in Turkey at all.
00:14:27.000 That's what happened.
00:14:28.000 I was there!
00:14:29.000 Promise me it's the best she show in the world.
00:14:43.000 This is the best she show in the world.
00:14:44.000 You promise, right?
00:14:45.000 Just suspicious.
00:14:46.000 He's confident.
00:14:46.000 Alright, he's confident.
00:14:47.000 He's confident.
00:14:52.000 I'm so excited about this.
00:14:53.000 Ah bro.
00:14:55.000 Me too.
00:14:55.000 I haven't had shisha in two days and only had to uh go back to jail.
00:15:01.000 Stressful.
00:15:04.000 Even I'm excited.
00:15:05.000 I'm excited.
00:15:06.000 It does smell pretty good.
00:15:08.000 It does.
00:15:08.000 It does.
00:15:17.000 Brother, what this she show over there in the corner. 1.00
00:15:20.000 It's for him, man.
00:15:23.000 tag friends It's pretty good.
00:15:39.000 It's pretty good.
00:15:40.000 I wouldn't say it's the best in the world, yes.
00:15:42.000 But it is pretty good.
00:15:44.000 He's a lot. 0.76
00:15:45.000 I can't murder him in this thing.
00:15:48.000 I would say it's the best in the world.
00:15:50.000 Is this the best one for us?
00:15:52.000 9 out of 10!
00:15:53.000 9 out of 10!
00:15:54.000 9! 0.55
00:15:55.000 5, 5, 9 out of 10!
00:15:57.000 We had a little bit more to throw!
00:15:59.000 We did something!
00:16:01.000 This is the best one for us!
00:16:03.000 This is the best one for us!
00:16:05.000 9 out of 10!
00:16:11.000 Oh.
00:16:13.000 Now that's a cloud.
00:16:18.000 I'll tell you when it's done.
00:16:20.000 9.5 seconds.
00:16:22.000 10.5 seconds.
00:16:52.000 10.5 seconds.
00:17:02.000 No one can do it.
00:17:03.000 This is not smart.
00:17:04.000 Dank cat.
00:17:05.000 Perrotulum's silak de la merie.
00:17:08.000 It is not really the best of your own.
00:17:10.000 You want Poseidon on your side on a monocrow.