Tate Speech


TRAPPED BY BEER | Tate Confidential Ep. 46


Summary

It's an emergency meeting. It's a meeting about work. And it's not an emergency because it's about work, but because it s about work and we re in lockdown. And we re drinking Champagne. And Rory s not allowed to drink Champagne again. And Luke s drinking beer in a glass. And that s not even half as bad as you think it is, because he s drinking a whole bottle of Champagne and it s actually tastes like... weird beer. It s an elaborate drink. And you know what else? It s a fancy drink that tastes like cold beer. But it s not cold beer, it s cold Champagne, and you re drinking it like it s hot. And if you don t know what that means, you re not going to like this episode, because it doesn t make any sense at all, but that s what happens when it s an emergency, and the business is in lockdown and we can t function without the business being on lockdown. Problem number 1: We need to get rid of Luke. Problem Number 2: Get rid of Rory. Problem No. 3: There s no one left. And problem No. 4: We can finally function without us slowing it down, so that we can finally run without slowing down the business. And problem number 5: How do you make money in Atlanta? We'll talk about how much fun it is in Atlanta and how much money you can have in Atlanta. And how to make it in Atlanta and much more! If you like it, please leave us a rating and review us a review on Apple Podcasts, and we'll send you a review! And we'll give you a shout out in the next episode! Thank you so much love and support you're amazing, thank you, bye! <3 -Dwayne the Rock Johnson. -Tate, Dwayne "The Rock Johnson, the rockin' Rock Johnson and the Rockin' Jermaine Dupri, the Rock 'n' Roll Crew, and I'll be back with a new song, "How Do You Make Money in Atlanta" by Dwayne the Rapper, "I'm Not a Bad Girl" by The Rock & Roll, "The Rapper" by the R&B Song, "Aunt Jemele White, "Good Shot" by Jazmin and I'm Too Effing Goodbye, "That's a Good Shot"


Transcript

00:00:00.000 Good shot there from Tate!
00:00:02.000 A lot of people say girls love money and that's not entirely true.
00:00:20.000 But I'm not a girl.
00:00:22.000 I'm a girl.
00:00:34.000 How many of you have seen the movie?
00:00:36.000 you It's an emergency. It's not an emergency.
00:00:41.000 It's an emergency meeting.
00:00:43.000 We're having an emergency meeting about work.
00:00:48.000 The business is on work.
00:00:50.000 I have a deep spot. It's probably a celebration.
00:01:06.000 This doesn't make sense.
00:01:08.000 Wasn't it? Why are we sparkling sparklers?
00:01:12.000 That one's already out for me.
00:01:16.000 No one cares what you think, Luke.
00:01:18.000 Give me champagne glass. I'm not thinking I ain't fancy.
00:01:23.000 Does this look like champagne?
00:01:24.000 Do I look fancy? Drinking beer out of champagne glass.
00:01:32.000 Sparklers for no reason.
00:01:33.000 The business is over. And we're in lockdown.
00:01:39.000 I was burning the chess pieces earlier.
00:01:41.000 Burn the chess pieces. It's fun.
00:01:43.000 Pretend you're shooting cannon at them.
00:01:46.000 See? It's very intense.
00:01:48.000 That's how you win chess. That's how you win.
00:01:50.000 You couldn't beat me. The greatest Grandmaster could beat me by sparkled his arms.
00:01:55.000 He might.
00:01:56.000 He might. Would you like a beer?
00:02:05.000 Would you like a champagne? No, thank you.
00:02:07.000 Would you like a champagne again?
00:02:09.000 Champagne again? Yeah, champagne again.
00:02:11.000 It's a new drink. It's when you try and look sexy and fancy, but really you're a scumbag who drinks cans of beer.
00:02:19.000 So, how is this in a meeting?
00:02:21.000 It's an emergency meeting to discuss the problems that we face in our lives.
00:02:28.000 Problem number one. We need to find Luke.
00:02:31.000 We need to send Luke back to America.
00:02:33.000 Problem number one is we need to get rid of Luke.
00:02:35.000 Alright. Urgently.
00:02:36.000 Tired of him. Problem number two?
00:02:38.000 Get rid of Rory. Shit.
00:02:41.000 Then problem number three, you get rid of me and I'll get rid of you.
00:02:45.000 Who's problem number three? There's no one left.
00:02:47.000 Yeah. We'll get rid of each other.
00:02:50.000 Business can finally function without us slowing it down.
00:02:53.000 How stupid of me to use the drink and smoke cigars.
00:02:56.000 Yeah, I mean, cutting directors a wreath.
00:02:59.000 Doesn't make any sense.
00:03:01.000 Thanks.
00:03:02.000 Champagne again? No.
00:03:06.000 Alright, well I've got to get back to work.
00:03:07.000 Would you like some legit champagne? You're not allowed to.
00:03:09.000 Are we done with the emergency meeting?
00:03:10.000 No, this is work now. This is your job.
00:03:17.000 Would you like a Cuban cigar?
00:03:19.000 I will actually have a Cuban cigar.
00:03:21.000 Only if you drink some champagne again.
00:03:24.000 Terms and conditions, my friend.
00:03:26.000 Champagne again. It doesn't even look good.
00:03:31.000 It actually tastes like...
00:03:33.000 weird. It tastes like cold beer in a glass.
00:03:36.000 Crazy, innit? It's an elaborate drink.
00:03:41.000 If you want to fight, you can't.
00:03:43.000 Put the gloves on right now, I will fight.
00:03:46.000 Do you want to, yes or no?
00:03:47.000 I do not want to. Why?
00:03:49.000 Because you're good.
00:03:51.000 I'm very good. I'm trying to put this glove on.
00:03:56.000 Because the tire burn.
00:04:02.000 Sent flaming rubber everywhere.
00:04:04.000 Okay. Landed on my hands.
00:04:06.000 And you can see when I try to remove the burning rubber, I lose the skin on my hands.
00:04:12.000 It may fight more painful than it needs to be.
00:04:15.000 It's been fucking I Put you on it put my gloves on I Don't know Mess around with her advice I Go
00:04:37.000 I
00:05:23.000 Thirty seconds We interrupt this program for a special news bulletin Oh Oh Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.
00:05:41.000 You know what? Everyone's going to ask us.
00:05:42.000 I'm going to say it now in advance.
00:05:44.000 You know what messages I'm getting? Everyone's messaging me already saying, how are you guys so rich?
00:05:48.000 How do you travel the world?
00:05:49.000 How do you have such a fucking amazing life?
00:05:51.000 How are your arms so big and chiseled?
00:05:54.000 And the answer is the same.
00:05:56.000 We make a lot of money. We make it online.
00:05:58.000 I'll teach you how. I'll teach you how.
00:06:00.000 I'll put a link in the description.
00:06:02.000 Stop fucking asking me that question.
00:06:03.000 Stop inboxing me. How do you make money?
00:06:04.000 It's in the description. That's how we make money.
00:06:06.000 We can go to the A.
00:06:14.000 We don't.
00:06:15.000 Look, A. Atlanta.
00:06:17.000 The A. We'll talk about how much fun it is.
00:06:19.000 Luke keeps talking about Atlanta and how much he wants to go.
00:06:22.000 I'm not going to Atlanta.
00:06:23.000 If you were really in Atlanta, what fun things could you do?
00:06:27.000 You can't drive supercars the way we drive them because you get arrested in a jail.
00:06:30.000 You can't go to the club because you're shot by Dwayne.
00:06:35.000 Yep. You can't.
00:06:36.000 All the girls are ugly with that.
00:06:38.000 It's true. You can't even show off too much when you're in a mobile world.
00:06:42.000 So what would you do if you were in Atlanta?
00:06:45.000 No, I don't want to go.
00:06:47.000 You guys bring it up and tell me I bring it up.
00:06:49.000 You can't wait to go to Atlanta.
00:06:50.000 Why? I don't want...
00:06:52.000 No. I 0% want to go to Atlanta.
00:06:54.000 Don't ask me to go. It's getting annoying.
00:06:58.000 I've never asked ever.
00:07:00.000 Where does Ryan Stoke Helbing come from?
00:07:09.000 you Rise of the Cowboys is one of my favorite songs.
00:07:12.000 My granddad used to sing it.
00:07:15.000 Your granddaddy? Yeah.
00:07:17.000 The drunken wife abuser.
00:07:19.000 He used to sing Rhinestone Cowboy.
00:07:21.000 He used to go in the pub, spend all the money, and walk home singing this, and neighbors used to tell him to shut up.
00:07:28.000 I do get that. I do get that.
00:07:31.000 Didn't know him very well, but...
00:07:33.000 Can you just imagine being drunk in this song making you really happy walking home from the pub?
00:07:37.000 Only... Like a Rhinestone Cowboy There's no way he knows what he's doing.
00:08:44.000 Luke has no idea.
00:08:47.000 He's a loser.
00:08:49.000 Luke hasn't got a clue.
00:08:51.000 Luke, I stacked them up so high they crashed down on me.
00:08:55.000 It's not even tall.
00:09:02.000 Close the door!
00:09:05.000 Close the door!
00:09:07.000 Fuck you. You're a loser.
00:09:10.000 I'll get you. So listen.
00:09:19.000 He might know what I'm doing by now.
00:09:22.000 Now he's fully aware of the game.
00:09:25.000 The crash broke him up.
00:09:27.000 Well, fuck him.
00:09:29.000 So you know what's happening.
00:09:31.000 No, you don't.
00:09:33.000 You do not know the full extent of your demise, you fucking...
00:09:38.000 loser.
00:09:42.000 You... Are done for.
00:09:45.000 In the words of Ned Slanders, you're done diddly young for.
00:09:51.000 I will defeat you by the power of repeating the same mistake.
00:09:58.000 You can fuck off.
00:10:01.000 I'll beat you forever.
00:10:07.000 I am the king.
00:10:09.000 Give me more beers.
00:10:10.000 Give me more beers. Here we go.
00:10:22.000 Nice, cold, Heineken.
00:10:25.000 Closing up your door.
00:10:27.000 Your tomb.
00:10:29.000 Sealing you in like an Egyptian pharaoh.
00:10:32.000 But a pharaoh without the cash.
00:10:35.000 Pharaohs had money.
00:10:37.000 If you sealed me in my tomb, I'd have my money.
00:10:41.000 My bitcoin, my dollars, my euros.
00:10:45.000 I'd have cash. Who are you?
00:10:47.000 You're a fucking...
00:10:49.000 Egyptian dork.
00:10:51.000 Get this.
00:10:53.000 Egyptian loser.
00:10:55.000 You're the Egyptian guy who sold goats to the man who fucked them for money.
00:11:02.000 You're a dork. Is this going to...
00:11:08.000 Sorry.
00:11:11.000 Is this going to impede his movements tomorrow morning?
00:11:14.000 He can't move. He opens the door, it falls in on him.
00:11:18.000 You win. Are these two heinekens gonna impede our movement?
00:11:23.000 Absolutely. Absolutely.
00:11:25.000 There's nothing left. Look. Everything's done.
00:11:29.000 So... That sure can.
00:11:32.000 Can we drink a nice cold beer between us friends?
00:11:42.000 We can. So Luke!
00:11:45.000 Emergency meeting!
00:11:50.000 Emergency meeting in the war room.
00:11:52.000 Let's go! A setup!
00:11:57.000 It's an emergency meeting in the war room.
00:11:59.000 Who do you think I am? Emergency meeting.
00:12:01.000 Let's go! Emergency meeting, Luke!
00:12:05.000 Let's go! You know that every time anyone says emergency meeting, we have to be in the war room.
00:12:10.000 Let's go.
00:12:10.000 Luke!
00:12:19.000 You're on your way.
00:12:22.000 Cool.
00:12:23.000 Keep filming. Why?
00:12:49.000 There's still beer!
00:12:50.000 There's a beer all over the ground!
00:12:56.000 Ah, emergency meeting!
00:13:02.000 Why is he listening?
00:13:04.000 I think it's okay to steal people's identity, you cunt.
00:13:06.000 Who am I, Andrew? Who am I?
00:13:08.000 But doesn't it make you nervous?
00:13:10.000 I think it's okay to steal people's identity, you cunt.
00:13:12.000 Who am I, Andrew Hook?
00:13:13.000 Who am I? Is that a black eye?
00:13:16.000 Yeah, because I can't block punches.