Tate Speech - June 21, 2024


Tristan Tate, The Art Collector | Tate Confidential Ep 237


Episode Stats

Length

15 minutes

Words per Minute

131.43456

Word Count

2,092

Sentence Count

266

Misogynist Sentences

7

Hate Speech Sentences

7


Summary

Captain Fun and Tristan have a heated argument about who is actually a better artist and who is a better car driver. Also, Captain Fun's car breaks down and he's stuck on the other side of the road while Tristan tries to get into his car, but he can't get in because he's not allowed to drive a car in the USA. This episode is brought to you by LaCie and produced by VaynerSpeakers. Logo by Courtney DeKorte. Theme by Mavus White. Music by PSOVOD and tyops. All rights reserved. Used by permission. No commercial use, unless otherwise specified. This podcast was produced and produced in partnership with La Cie. We do not own the rights to any music used in this podcast. If you enjoyed it please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever else you get your music downloads. Thank you for listening and share it on your socials! XOXO, Timestamps: 1:00:00 - Who was a better Artist? 2:30 - Who is a Better Car Driver? 3:15 - Which car do you drive better than the other? 4:40 - Which is better car? 5:20 - What do you like to drive? 6:00 7:00- Who was the better driver? 8:30- Who is the better vehicle? 9:15- Which car is better? 11:40- What is the most beautiful? 12: What is your favorite color? 15:00, 16: What are you going to buy? 17:20- What are your favorite piece of art? 18:30, 19:40, 21:00s - Who are you most beautiful thing? 22:30s - What would you like? 23:40s - How do you think you would like to buy the most expensive car you like most? 26:30 27:20s 28:00Solo? 29: Who do you want me to buy it? 31:40 32: What do I want to buy my house? 35:00? 33:00 + 36:00a. 36:15 37:10s? 38:00 Is it more beautiful than this? 39:15s


Transcript

00:00:00.000 What are the odds?
00:00:09.000 Very low.
00:00:10.000 How would that ever happen?
00:00:11.000 That little Toyota is a different vehicle.
00:00:14.000 Yeah, you know what? I will get in here.
00:00:16.000 It's about getting out though.
00:00:20.000 Hi friend! Hi friend!
00:00:26.000 God is good.
00:00:28.000 God is good.
00:00:30.000 Wine time.
00:00:32.000 Fuck you, man.
00:00:34.000 Come to the other side.
00:00:36.000 Don't scratch my car, by the way.
00:00:38.000 He can't get in his car.
00:00:42.000 Ha ha ha.
00:00:44.000 Turn in the void.
00:00:48.000 Turn in the void.
00:00:50.000 He makes me turn.
00:00:52.000 In the void.
00:00:54.000 Turn in the void.
00:00:56.000 Turn in the void.
00:00:58.000 He makes me turn.
00:01:00.000 Turn in the void.
00:01:02.000 Turn in the void.
00:01:04.000 To give the rhythm of this dance very short.
00:01:26.000 Count the galadins. One, two, three, four girls.
00:01:29.000 He was cancelled by the Matrix for telling the truth.
00:01:33.000 Gauden. Yeah.
00:01:35.000 First of all... Big art guy, huh?
00:01:37.000 Yeah, he was cancelled by the Matrix for telling the truth.
00:01:40.000 He had the Gauden, some girls.
00:01:42.000 He had a watch, I had a watch. But let's cut the bullshit and be deadly serious.
00:01:47.000 Who was actually a better artist?
00:01:51.000 Me or someone or nothing.
00:01:53.000 No bullshit. No jokes.
00:01:54.000 Deadly serious. I know it's too confidential, but I want to be actually serious now, baby.
00:01:59.000 Who was actually a better artist?
00:02:01.000 I was going to say me. You.
00:02:02.000 You're not even in this race. Tristan, this is the first time I've seen you out of the house in weeks.
00:02:08.000 That's not true. What brought Captain Fun out of Funland?
00:02:12.000 It's because I don't hang around with you. I'm out of the house all the time.
00:02:15.000 You're just not invited. And sometimes he said something about Hitler at that period, something good about Hitler when it looked like he was very...
00:02:27.000 because he was in the surrealistic medium where most of them were jewels.
00:02:34.000 So they punished him for speaking his mind?
00:02:36.000 Yes, they said you are a fascist.
00:02:39.000 You are an antisemite, more than that.
00:02:42.000 Did you go to jail? No, no, no, no, no.
00:02:44.000 Ah, just me. You went to the USA. Just me.
00:02:46.000 No problem. But in the USA, I understand he designed all the costumes for the Rockefeller and...
00:02:53.000 It was the J.D. Rockefeller and the Rothschild Ball.
00:02:57.000 He designed all the costumes for them, didn't he?
00:02:59.000 In France, he took this contact with the haute couture medium.
00:03:06.000 He met Coco Chanel, he met Elisashka Parelli, he worked with a model, then Amanda Lear.
00:03:14.000 After that she was a singer, but first she was a model.
00:03:17.000 How did you get Captain Fun out of the house?
00:03:20.000 Turns out he leaves for the very fun things like this.
00:03:24.000 Listen buddy, I challenge you to a draw-off.
00:03:28.000 You and me. I think you're something.
00:03:32.000 Right here, right now.
00:03:34.000 We're going to have a draw. We're going to get paper, we're going to get pencils, we're going to have a draw.
00:03:38.000 I'm not seeing anything more beautiful than my Ferrari, or my Bugatti, or my Lamborghini, or my Bentley, or my RS7 Audi, or my Audi RE. I just followed.
00:03:48.000 I don't see anything more beautiful than this.
00:03:49.000 What about my Pagani, my Koenigsegg?
00:03:52.000 Yeah, we've got gloves. Captain Fun, what do you think of the art?
00:04:02.000 That is the most famous. Everyone would know what that is.
00:04:05.000 Everyone knows what it is. These aren't for sale, are they?
00:04:07.000 No, no, no.
00:04:09.000 They're not for sale. They're 18 carats gold with diamonds and rubies and everything you see.
00:04:16.000 It's amazing. Who canceled him?
00:04:49.000 It was the Jews who didn't want him to talk anymore?
00:04:52.000 Why was he canceled?
00:04:54.000 He could not be canceled.
00:04:56.000 He just flew and found another space where he could speak.
00:05:01.000 His mind and his will.
00:05:04.000 But they tried to shut him up, right?
00:05:05.000 He tried, but...
00:05:06.000 Right.
00:05:09.000 No problem. He found who was creative enough.
00:05:15.000 Got to think outside the box.
00:05:16.000 Aikido. To defeat the matrix.
00:05:18.000 Find a new way to express yourself.
00:05:24.000 In terms of acceptance.
00:05:31.000 This is St.
00:05:32.000 George with the dragon.
00:05:34.000 Story of my life. It was made in 1977.
00:05:39.000 There's only 350 of them.
00:05:41.000 Only 350.
00:05:42.000 And it was commissioned by him. Yes, I'll buy it.
00:05:45.000 You want the support also?
00:05:48.000 Do I want the support also?
00:05:54.000 Where are you going to put the Salvador Dali thing?
00:05:57.000 New house, bookshelf, in between all my books in the new house.
00:06:02.000 He has a vision.
00:06:04.000 He has a vision and he spent $151.
00:06:07.000 Yeah. Yeah, buy it.
00:06:08.000 Let me pay for it first. I'll put it on card and my security guard will carry it.
00:06:12.000 What can you do? You need one now.
00:06:16.000 Do I get a more expensive one than him?
00:06:17.000 Do it. Do it.
00:06:20.000 Don't start with Salvador Dali flex off.
00:06:23.000 It's been a while since we've had a Salvador Dali flex off.
00:06:26.000 It's been a while. Is that even a thing?
00:06:30.000 It is now. Tristan, when you get home, we're going to have to do the Salvador Dali dance.
00:06:35.000 Look at him now discussing how to pay all this.
00:06:38.000 Everyone's confused. Like, 151 grand, why are you...
00:06:41.000 And he's sitting there like, oh yeah, what do you want?
00:06:43.000 Probably got cash in his pocket.
00:06:46.000 I'm going to make him do a Salvador Dali dance for this.
00:06:49.000 That's my retribution. Did it with the Rolls Royce.
00:06:53.000 What are you guys doing? Oh, you've never seen this before?
00:06:56.000 No. Men like you, anyone else have seen this?
00:06:58.000 A few people? Very few.
00:07:00.000 Very few. This is called the New Rolls Royce Dance.
00:07:02.000 He does it with all the other cars.
00:07:04.000 He has to do a Salvador Dali dance for the money he's just spent.
00:07:08.000 Or it won't be a take-confidential episode.
00:07:11.000 Teach him a lesson. Why are they wrapping his Salvador Dali?
00:07:14.000 He's actually buying this. I think you should show him up.
00:07:25.000 Do I show him up?
00:07:31.000 Yeah, I'll be very honest.
00:07:32.000 I'm going to break the fourth wall.
00:07:33.000 Hello, people at home. I'm strongly considering buying this piece of art I do not want for the Tate Confidential episode for the episode alone.
00:07:40.000 I'll never use it. I'll never appreciate it.
00:07:42.000 I'll probably lose it, but I'm thinking of doing it just to make a good episode of Tristan bought Salvador Dali, and then I came along and bought more Salvador Dali, and we're Salvador Dali superfans, Salvador Dali flex off.
00:07:51.000 I'm considering it.
00:07:54.000 Back in character. You won't f***ing buy it!
00:07:58.000 I don't think it's possible.
00:08:14.000 You don't take tips? I don't dare take you so much money.
00:08:18.000 Please, please, please, we appreciate the tour.
00:08:19.000 Come on! I appreciate it.
00:08:20.000 Well, I'll leave it here and stay there forever if you don't take it.
00:08:23.000 I did it with my colleagues.
00:08:25.000 Thank you very much!
00:08:28.000 It's most generous of you!
00:08:30.000 Thank you! No problem, you did a very in-depth thorn.
00:08:33.000 You really know your stuff. Smart people are doing your work.
00:08:36.000 I told Emilia that she's a really good guy.
00:08:40.000 Thank you! We're very glad that you really enjoyed it.
00:08:45.000 I don't know what to say!
00:08:47.000 Thank you! She doesn't have words anymore.
00:08:48.000 Thank you very much for the talk.
00:08:50.000 We appreciate it. We enjoyed it very much.
00:08:52.000 Oh yeah! Thank you!
00:08:56.000 Thank you.
00:08:58.000 How heavy is it?
00:09:00.000 Easy with that.
00:09:02.000 I'm strong.
00:09:04.000 Do you need any help?
00:09:07.000 No, perfectly fine.
00:09:08.000 Thank you very much. Sorry for the left hand.
00:09:10.000 Don't worry. Don't worry.
00:09:11.000 It was a pleasure.
00:09:12.000 Yeah? You know what?
00:09:14.000 Left hand handshakes used to be the sign of Soviet spies.
00:09:16.000 Yeah, I know.
00:09:17.000 So, bad luck. I don't like to shake your hand.
00:09:19.000 Andrew, please, please.
00:09:22.000 One photo altogether.
00:09:23.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:09:25.000 Please, please. I'm a little sweaty.
00:09:27.000 I love you so much, Andrew.
00:09:30.000 I love you so much, Andrew.
00:09:31.000 A few moments later.
00:09:33.000 What are you wearing?
00:09:56.000 What do you mean?
00:09:59.000 Do you think you're Salvador Dali?
00:10:01.000 You're not Salvador Dali.
00:10:03.000 I'm not. As a serious art collector, I decided to ditch my conventional style and spice things up a little bit.
00:10:10.000 You know? You get one piece of art and now you think you're some big shot art collector.
00:10:17.000 Think I'm a big shot art collector!
00:10:19.000 That cost me $35,000.
00:10:21.000 Do you have $35,000 worth of art, Bailey?
00:10:24.000 I am the artist. I'm going to take my new hobby seriously.
00:10:27.000 I'm not here to be a fucking laughing stock for the likes of you.
00:10:30.000 I am the artist, Tee.
00:10:32.000 Listen, Bailey, I'm going to count to three, and you better apologize.
00:10:37.000 Un? Deux?
00:10:39.000 I refuse. You know what?
00:10:41.000 I have an idea. Andrew challenged me to a draw-off.
00:10:45.000 He and I Can have art draw off, and whoever's art is worthy enough can go into your collection.
00:10:51.000 How does that sound? Well, as a serious collector of art, as you can tell from the way I'm dressed, I feel like I'm the only person qualified to referee this competition.
00:10:59.000 Let's go. Let's go!
00:11:01.000 Let me see what I got. Tristan now thinks he's some big shot art collector, okay?
00:11:09.000 So, I know you and I had our little beef moment where we said we were going to have a draw off, so I think now is the perfect time.
00:11:16.000 I challenge you to a draw off, and whoever is his best, he is going to put in his acclaimed art collection.
00:11:22.000 So, you're going down.
00:11:24.000 If I were to punch you as hard as I could.
00:11:31.000 My shoulder wouldn't work and I couldn't draw.
00:11:32.000 I would snap your sternum.
00:11:34.000 I don't even know what surgery that would require to fix.
00:11:38.000 I'm not disagreeing.
00:11:40.000 I want you to know that before we begin this fucking draw.
00:11:44.000 I ain't scared of you.
00:11:48.000 Let's go, pussy. Let's go.
00:11:51.000 Alright, Tristan. T, let's do this.
00:11:58.000 I hear you are in need of my Is this because of that ugly statue you bought?
00:12:06.000 I'm a serious art collector.
00:12:08.000 And I'm embracing my hobby by changing my style slightly.
00:12:12.000 Is this because I buy too many cars and you're just wasting money now to try and get me back?
00:12:16.000 I don't know what you are talking about.
00:12:19.000 Alright, this is already getting out of control.
00:12:21.000 So, let's just do this draw off.
00:12:23.000 Let's get this over with.
00:12:25.000 If Bailey beats me, I'll snap his sternum and I'll go back to work.
00:12:29.000 Well, as the most qualified man in the house, I'm the ref.
00:12:34.000 I'm gonna tell you two what to draw on the count of trois.
00:12:40.000 And you go for it. Okay?
00:12:41.000 Pens and paper at Zeretti.
00:12:43.000 On guard. Alright Alex, take the camera.
00:12:46.000 Take the camera. Nigel.
00:12:50.000 I'm gonna sit over there. Of course.
00:12:51.000 I'm going to stand here as the independent adjudicator.
00:12:54.000 I've got to scoot that one. I've got to take a seat at it.
00:13:00.000 Of all the things I could be doing with my time, which is extremely valuable by the way,
00:13:06.000 Sorry, what time?
00:13:08.000 I know one of the K watches is pocket watches only.
00:13:11.000 Where the fuck did you get a pocket watch?
00:13:13.000 I've always had a pocket watch.
00:13:17.000 I'm not even going to ask questions.
00:13:20.000 At Zerate, you will have 60 seconds to draw one another.
00:13:26.000 No!
00:13:27.000 Bailey, you draw Andrew.
00:13:29.000 Andrew, you draw Bailey.
00:13:32.000 On the count of trois.
00:13:34.000 Oh!
00:13:35.000 I've seen it!
00:13:38.000 I've seen it!
00:13:39.000 I'm so scared!
00:13:40.000 I've seen it!
00:13:41.000 This is scary!
00:13:42.000 I've seen it!
00:13:43.000 This is so scary!
00:13:44.000 Trois!
00:13:45.000 Alright, alright.
00:13:46.000 How long do we have?
00:13:47.000 60 seconds.
00:13:50.000 Oh, shit!
00:13:51.000 It has been 15 seconds.
00:13:52.000 Oh, shit!
00:13:53.000 It has been 15 seconds.
00:13:54.000 Oh, shit!
00:13:55.000 It has been 15 seconds.
00:13:56.000 Oh, shit!
00:13:57.000 It has been 15 seconds.
00:13:58.000 Oh, shit!
00:13:59.000 It has been 15 seconds.
00:14:00.000 Oh, shit!
00:14:01.000 It has been 15 seconds.
00:14:01.000 It has been 15 seconds.
00:14:02.000 Oh, shit!
00:14:03.000 It has been 15 seconds.
00:14:04.000 Oh, shit!
00:14:05.000 It has been 15 seconds.
00:14:06.000 Oh, shit!
00:14:07.000 It has been 15 seconds.
00:14:08.000 Oh, shit!
00:14:09.000 It has been 15 seconds.
00:14:11.000 Shit. Shit's right.
00:14:14.000 It has been 30 seconds.
00:14:17.000 You have 15 seconds remaining.
00:14:37.000 I'm going to start.
00:14:44.000 Are you ready?
00:14:51.000 Let's see. It's you in jail.
00:14:54.000 Let's see. It's Andrew in jail.
00:14:58.000 In mid defeat. Andrew, can you show your art You win.
00:15:14.000 Tiny neck. Tiny neck and a Bible and skinny legs.
00:15:20.000 Let me see.
00:15:21.000 I admit defeat. That's so accurate.
00:15:23.000 I declare the winner!
00:15:37.000 Of this draw-off.
00:15:40.000 Monsieur, and you take it.
00:15:43.000 I was gonna break your fucking stereotype!
00:15:46.000 You are lucky you lost this competition, so then at the fucking end you, you pencil-neck fuck!
00:15:50.000 Build different! Never lost a fucking game!
00:15:53.000 Never lost a game!