Stop Drowning in Tedious Tasks by Taming Your Life Admin
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Summary
Life admin is the little tasks we have to do to keep our lives moving along. Life admin is typically pretty tedious and annoying, but staying on top of it is essential to reducing the stress and chaos that would otherwise burden our relationships, muck up our schedules, and prevent us from participating in all the fun and fulfilling parts of life.
Transcript
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We're at McKay here and welcome to another edition of the art of manliness podcast,
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filling out paperwork, making travel reservations, paying bills, shopping for groceries,
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returning packages. These are all examples of life admin, the little tasks we have to do to
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keep our lives moving along. Life admin is typically pretty tedious and annoying,
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but staying on top of it is essential to reducing the stress and chaos that would otherwise burden
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our relationships, muck up the gears of our schedules, and prevent us from participating
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in all the fun and fulfilling parts of life. Fortunately, there are ways to better manage
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your life admin. Here to share some of them is Dinah Rowe Roberts, the co-host of the Life Admin
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Life Hacks podcast and the co-author of a book of the same name. Today on the show, Dinah explains
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what lists you should be keeping, including the 10-minute time killers list, why you should do a
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regular hour of power to stay on top of things, how to schedule your life admin, how to keep track
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of and divvy up chores between you and your spouse, how to get all of your meal planning and grocery
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shopping done in less than 15 minutes a week, how to streamline your kids' schedules and your
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vacation planning, and much more. After the show's over, check out our show notes at
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aom.is slash lifeadmin. Dinah Rowe Roberts, welcome to the show.
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So you are the co-host of a podcast called Life Admin Hacks. You've also co-authored a book with
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the same name, and it's all about life admin. I love thinking about and improving how I manage my
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own life admin. For those who aren't familiar, what is life admin?
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Well, life admin, it's really the homework of life. So it's not chores, which in Australia we call
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housework, which is really traditionally, you know, the cooking, the cleaning, and the laundry,
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but it often is supporting those things. And it's not parenting. It's not about the actual physical,
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emotional, social development of your child. It's actually a third piece of the domestic labor
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puzzle. It's all of the scheduling, the booking, the shopping, the paperwork, the planning.
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It often facilitates chores and parenting, but it's its own beast. It's its own thing.
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Yeah. The way I think about life admin, it's like the mental work that you have to do to do those
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physical activities, right? So if you're planning a trip, the thing is like the trip, like that's the
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activity. The life admin is all the stuff you have to do to make that trip happen, planning the
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itinerary, rental cars, scheduling flights, things like that. Yeah. It's often a hidden burden and it
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can generate a significant portion of what people call the mental load, the kind of thinking, the
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planning, the anticipating that you need to do to make life work. Well, let's give some more
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examples. What's some more examples of life admin that people might see in their lives on a regular
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basis? Yeah. And I think then it's really important or it's interesting or helpful to think about life
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admin being like two types of life admin because there's everyday life admin. It occurs cyclically,
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seasonally, daily, weekly. So things like planning the grocery shopping, doing the meal planning,
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paying the bills, all those things that just happen over and over again, never ending.
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And then you've got what we call like life event admin. So, you know, if you have an event,
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you get married, you have a baby, those sorts of things, they trigger enormous amounts of life admin
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as well. So it can be helpful to think about having those two types of life admin and thinking
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about dealing with them a little bit differently. Why does it feel like we're always drowning
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in life admin? Like what is so insidious about it that it just seems like it's just always piling up?
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Yeah. I think that has changed in recent times because of technology and choice. And I think that
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the more choice we have, the reality is the more life admin it creates. So I think that's certainly a
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factor. I think another thing is that the costs of communication are lower. And so what we find is
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our providers bombarding us with emails and text messages and all those things. So we're getting
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more and more information that we have to figure out what to do and what to process with. And life
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admin grows with growing responsibilities. So as we move through life, things like buying a home,
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having kids, it increases the amount and complexity of life admin, just if you've got less time,
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because you've got more parenting, caring, work responsibilities. So I think that that's often
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why people, particularly in a sort of middle age, feel like they're drowning in life admin. And I think
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part of that is very few people have thought about setting up systems for life admin that really
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optimize how to deal with it. And even though you might do it in your professional life,
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a lot of people don't do it in their personal life. And so they haven't got the systems to
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adequately know what to do when something hits them. And I think that makes it feel quite chaotic.
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Well, another thing too, I've heard about what might be increasing life admin,
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we've written about this on our site, there's a book by I think it was a sociologist about shadow
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work. You've heard about this idea of shadow work? Right. So shadow work is the stuff that used to be
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done by professionals or like companies, but companies have shifted it to the consumer. So I mean,
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like planning a trip is a perfect example. Used to be just, you call a travel agent or even the
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airline and be like, Hey, I want to go here. And they'd be like, all right, they just figured out
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for you. But now it's like, you have to go through just tons and tons of different itineraries to
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schedule a flight and to the airline's defense. They say, well, you just have more options. You can
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actually figure this out on your own. We're giving you that choice, like you said earlier,
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but they're also saving themselves maybe some, some of the hassle of having to pay an employee to do
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that for you. Yeah, a hundred percent. And I think, you know, often we want to take that control
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into our life. You know, we feel like we want to be in charge and that gives you that choice,
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which, you know, has upsized, but with more choice comes more work, more responsibility to
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make those decisions, do the research, understand what you're looking at. And so that definitely
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creates more life admin. And the other thing I've noticed too, is that sometimes it feels like
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life admin, because there's can be a seasonality to it. You can get hit with a whole bunch of stuff
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all at once. So you see this, if you have kids in school, seems like at Christmas, right before
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Christmas and right before summer holiday here in the United States, that's when everyone tries
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to cram everything in and you're signing up for things that are going to be happening three months
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later. And so the last two weeks of school, before school goes out for vacation, it's just like,
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I'm constantly like, there's forms to fill out. I'm trying to manage schedules. Like this kid needs
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to be here and this kid needs to bring this thing. I don't know what happens. Everyone just decides
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to do everything at once. It causes all the life admin to pile up on you at once.
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Yeah, a hundred percent. I think that often can come in like waves. And I think there's a great
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saying. I can't even think exactly what it is, but something like, you know, you can't catch the
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waves, but you can learn how to surf. And I think that's really what we're trying to help people do
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with their life admin is actually, you need to actually have systems so that you can ride the wave
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as it comes in and comes at you so that it doesn't turn your life into chaos.
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Okay. So let's talk about some of your tips for how we can keep from drowning
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in life admin on a daily basis and surf the bigger waves when they come in.
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What do you recommend people do to capture the life admin they have coming into their lives?
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So one of the things we suggest to people, particularly when, you know, you've got other
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members of a household is thinking about setting up a dedicated email address for your life admin.
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So that means it won't get mixed up with kind of your personal emails, which are probably,
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you know, much more on the social side or work emails. And what it means is if you have a partner,
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you can actually move your life admin into neutral territory and sort of operate it like you would
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a shared inbox in a work situation. And that really means that all of your life admin in terms
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of the electronic stuff comes into the same spot. And you can both share the responsibility of
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triaging everything that hits you through that inbox.
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Okay. So it'd be something like in our instance, it'd be like mckayfamily at gmail.com. I don't have
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that address. So if anyone tries emailing me there, they're not going to get anything. So you'd use
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that email when you sign up for cell service, when you're doing stuff with your kid's school,
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et cetera. That's the email you'd use. So all that communication would go there.
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Yeah. So that's what certainly my husband and I have. We have a shared life admin email address
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and everything to do with our shared life admin hits that email address. And so what it does mean
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is that I can happily go away for a week and know that I don't even have to look at that email address.
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He can take care of it. Or if I'm having a busy time at work, you know, the same thing. And it really
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means that we can really seamlessly share that inbox and all of the actions that come out of it.
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That's a good idea because I know sometimes I'll use my email address for something like
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travel reservations or something with school. So I get the email, but my wife doesn't or it's vice
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versa. So one of us just ends up out of the loop. So we might have to try that. Okay. So have a shared
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email address for life admin stuff. If you're married, what about, what do you do to capture stuff
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that just pops up during the day? You know, stuff where you're like, I need to remember that, or I need
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to do that. What do you do to, with those sorts of things?
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Yeah. So I think in terms of the actual doing of it and capturing other things, we really like to think
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about life admin tasks in terms of actually how much time is required to get them done. And that really
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helps you think about when you're going to do them. And maybe we'll come to that a bit later, but in terms
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of anything that you can't do immediately. So we do love to adopt the, you know, two minute too easy.
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If it hits your inbox and you can do it straight away in less than two minutes, do it, get rid of
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it, file the email, delete the email, move on. But if it's something that's going to take a little bit
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longer than that, we recommend setting up a to-do list that we call 10 minute time killers for those
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kind of 10 minute tasks. So those are tasks that, you know, might take, you know, like maybe something
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a little bit more complicated, but they're not going to take a lot of thinking time.
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And if you have a separate list with all of those tasks on them, it means that if you have a bit of
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idle time, you can easily tackle those tasks. And, you know, usually that's the time that people
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might scroll social media or, you know, those kind of, you know, if you're in between meetings or you're
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waiting in a line or you're kind of watching TV. So those tasks don't need to be scheduled, but if
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you've got them all in a list, you can know what to attack and you can add things that are 10 minute
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time killers as they occur to you as you go. You just use a simple reminder app on the iPhone to
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easily add items that I think of to that list as I go. And then I have another list, which has got
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more chunky life admin tasks in it that we call the hour of power. So if they're more complicated,
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like comparison shopping and those sorts of things, and that means they're separate in a separate list.
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And I have a scheduled time once a week to tackle those chunky life admin tasks. So I know if I add
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something to that list, I know when I'm going to be able to get to it. So we have a shared 10 minute
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time killer list between my husband and I. And so things in that list get allocated to one of us,
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but we can also see what the other tasks are that the other person's got to do. And then the same for
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an hour of power list. What do you do with paper things? I mean, I know you're big on, you have a whole
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chapter about just reducing the amount of paper that crosses your desk, but occasionally it's going to
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happen, you're going to get something. What do you do with that stuff? Yeah. So if it's something
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that just needs to be filed, I'm big of like scanning photographing immediately and trying
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to destroy it. So I'm a big fan of going completely paperless, but if it is a form that needs to be
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filled out, I would still add it to the list in terms of the 10 minute time killer, if it's going to be
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a 10 minute list. And then we just have a little paperwork spot in the house. But to be honest,
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very little paperwork hits our house anymore. So once you've really made the effort to go
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paperless, you find that actually there's a really little paper still happening out there.
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Let's talk more about lists. So you have the two minute, two easy list. Actually, that's,
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that's actually not really a list. Those are things that just kind of come up to you and you do them
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right then, but you do have the 10 minute time killer list. And then you have the chunky admin
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list where you'll do stuff for your, in your hour of power. And we're going to talk about that
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here in a minute, but beyond the to-do list, you also recommend keeping checklists and reference
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lists. Walk us through those. Yeah. And I think when we started this whole life admin journey,
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both my co-author and I, Mia and I, we both had kind of our lists were like a mishmash of all of
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these three things. And I think that that's often what happens to people and it makes it really hard
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to sort of figure out what to tackle next. So if you think about having those three categories of lists,
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to-do lists we've talked about, but the second one, checklists, checklists are things that help you
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remember how to do things you do over and over again, efficiently and comprehensively. So you write
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the steps down once, and then you refer to it every time you need to do that. So for me, the checklists
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that I use most often are like the things to do before you go on holiday, you know, so all of the,
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you know, organize the pet sitting, organize the mail collection, et cetera, et cetera. But you might
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also have checklists for things like what to take when you take your child to daycare or something
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like that. And those checklists really help you not remember important steps in that task.
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In terms of reference lists, these are kind of the things that you often find on people's to-do
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lists, but they're not actually things that they have to do. They're more like suggestions or
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recommendations or, you know, like sources of information. So the reference lists I've got on my phone
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or in my reminders app is gift wish lists for family members. So thinking about things I might
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buy for the next birthday or Christmas, I've got reference lists of podcasts to listen to,
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and one of TV shows to watch and one of books to read. So, you know, the next time someone ask you
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something like that, you'll have a whole list ready to go and you know where to put that information and
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Yeah. So I keep that too. So I keep a list of things to, I need to read, movies I want to watch,
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which podcast I want to listen to. Another list I keep is, this is a new one, restaurants we want
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to go to. You know how like, you know, lots of times you're driving around town and you see a
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new restaurant, like, oh, I want to try that out. It looks cool. And then the next time when you're
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trying to figure out where to eat that night, you end up forgetting about that restaurant you saw.
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So we've tried to make it a habit. Whenever you see a cool restaurant, put it on a list so we can
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check it out. The gift list is a good idea. My wife is really good about doing that.
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Another kind of list that my wife and I keep is a things we want to talk about list. So this is for
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whenever we're about to see a friend that we haven't seen in a while, we're about to catch up
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with them. We have a list of things we want to make sure we hit with them and ask them about when we
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see them. Yeah, that's a really good one. I actually read an article about that recently in terms of
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improving social connection and how important that is. So yeah, that's a great idea.
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So you can use just the Notes app to make these lists. You use the Reminders app on iPhone?
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Yeah, and I think that you can get a little bit caught up in trying to get the most complicated
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app out there. And I think all of our advice really when it comes to technology is use what
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you find really easy to use. It doesn't need to be super complicated as long as you know how to use
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it. And you, particularly if you're sharing that technology with someone else, you have a shared
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understanding of how you're going to use it together. That's way more important than having lots of
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bells and whistles in the particular app. Okay, I don't, I've never used the Reminders
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app because I use Todoist. That's the app that I like to use. You can share things on that with
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other people? Yeah, so I mean, the Reminders app on iPhone is pretty good now in terms of the
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sharing functionality. But I mean, there's loads of great apps out there. Todoist is a great one.
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And so if that's something you're familiar with, that's usually the one to stick with. Because if you
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like it, you're going to use it. And if you don't like it, you won't use it. So yeah, we really
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encourage you to find one that feels good to you in terms of its functionality and even aesthetics.
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So that works for you. And think about making one that you can use with a voice assistant,
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because that's really helpful. I don't know about you, but I often remember things when I'm driving
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in the car or when I'm going for a walk and being able to just ask Siri to add them to my list. It
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reduces my mental load because I've added it to the list and I can forget about it and move on.
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Yeah, I think with Todoist, you can sync it with Siri. So you can talk to Siri and
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Siri will add it to Todoist. But sometimes it doesn't work. So I'll have to check out Reminders
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app. So I want to go back to this idea of the hour of power. So you categorize your life admin as the
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two-minute-too-easy. So if you can do it within two minutes, just do it. Don't wait. I think David
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Allen from Getting Things Done has that same idea.
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Then you have the 10-minute time killer. So those are things you can do in 10 minutes that don't
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take a lot of mental bandwidth to do. You'll have that there to do it. The hour of power. So tell us
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more about this. So you're going to dedicate an hour, is it each day, each week to doing those life
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Well, I think obviously how many of the hours of power you need will depend on where you're at,
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like in terms of how in control you are and I guess what's going on in your life. So if you're in a
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time of your life with a lot of life admin, you might need a few of those hour of powers scheduled
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in your calendar. But for me, I actually usually have an hour of power once a fortnight. And it's
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really this dedicated time slot for tackling these substantial items that require concentration.
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So it might be things like comparison shopping, a utility service. It might be planning a birthday
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party or that kind of thing. And what we really recommend is scheduling this recurring time slot in
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your calendar so that you know when you're going to get to those tasks. Because that is a thing that
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will take off the kind of stress and anxiety because you're like, okay, I know I'm going to get to that
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at this time every week. And we also encourage people to think about giving it like a powerful
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name to claim the space. So I know that Mia, who's my co-host, she likes to call her Set Me Up Sunday.
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So that's really helping her thinking about, you know, setting herself up for a really good week because
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she's tackled any of those chunky tasks that have been weighing on her mind.
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Yeah, I do an hour of power. Friday is the day I do it. It's like every Friday I do it.
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Usually it's an hour. I just set aside an hour. If I can't get it done with an hour,
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then I move on to something else. But usually I can get most of it done within an hour.
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Yeah. I mean, usually if you set yourself a time limit, you can get most of those tasks done within
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an hour. And I think it's really helpful to kind of give yourself a boundary. Like I'm willing to invest
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an hour in my life admin and then I'm going to move on because the reality is it's boring,
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it's tedious, but it's important. So, you know, truly trying to knock off those tasks in as
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shorter time as possible means you can get back to the things you really want to do in life.
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Something my wife and I do every now and then, we call it a reset day where we take a whole day
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to just do stuff that's been piling up. We do it when we need to, when we feel like,
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oh my gosh, there's just so much going on. We need a reset day. So we'll just take a day.
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Usually it's during the week because the kids are at school and they're not around. And so we just
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get through stuff as much as we can during that entire day.
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Yeah, I think that's a really good idea. Like I think when you realize that things aren't feeling
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good, really scheduling that time in your calendar and committing to actually getting rid of those
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things that are stressing you out, it's going to improve your life overall. So that's a great idea.
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You have a whole chapter about scheduling your life admins. I think the way most people approach
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life admin, they just do it on a, well, I need to do this thing, so I'm going to do it now.
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How do you recommend scheduling out your life admin? So we have the hour of power.
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That's one thing, but any other tips on scheduling out your life admin?
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Yeah, so I think a couple of things there. The first one is, I guess, going back to the sharing
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idea and thinking, okay, in life, there's lots of, you know, in a household, you do need to actually
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understand what's going on. And so you really do need some sort of cross platform calendar tool that
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everyone in your household can access. And so in my household, it's not just my husband,
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I've got two teenagers. So understanding where they're going and them understanding where we're
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going is really important to kind of dealing with the family logistics. So we're really technology
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agnostic about it, but you really need to have a tool that everyone in your household can add to,
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can see, so that everyone can see what's going on and understand what the logistics are of the
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household. So I guess that's the first thing. I don't know if you've got a shared calendar in your
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So our kids don't have smartphones yet. So we don't have that shared digital calendar,
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but we do have this giant dry erase calendar that we put on the wall in the kitchen. And we have a
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family meeting once a week and we go over our schedule and we have our kids write in all the
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stuff they've got going on. So that's what we do. But I get maybe when they get older and they get
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smartphones, we'll shift to a shared digital calendar.
00:20:51.120
Oh, it's a great habit to get them into in terms of the analog system to transition into digital. But yeah,
00:20:56.300
that's, it's been a bit of a game changer for us in terms of, I used to feel like I had to ring up
00:21:00.540
my husband and ask permission of, could I go to the movies with my friend? Cause I don't really
00:21:04.280
know what was going on. And so this kind of shared calendar, like gives me permission to actually
00:21:09.580
know what's going on in our family. So we don't have to have those kinds of consultations about
00:21:16.060
So what sorts of things are you putting on this shared calendar?
00:21:18.600
Yeah. So family trips, all of the social events, who's being picked up, who's being dropped off,
00:21:23.780
you know, all of those school events that we want to go to. And then my husband and I both put our
00:21:28.900
own social events on there so that we can see what each other's up to. And we know that there's always
00:21:32.860
needs to be an adult home every night to cook the dinner and, you know, supervise. And so really
00:21:38.020
making sure that we know what each other's doing without kind of feeling like we need to ask permission
00:21:44.400
We're going to take a quick break for your words from our sponsors.
00:21:52.340
So speaking of syncing up with your spouse, so the shared calendar can go a long way to reducing a lot
00:21:58.960
of the friction of trying to sync your calendar with your family or your spouse. Do you do anything
00:22:04.300
else beyond just having the shared calendar and the shared list to make sure that you guys are on
00:22:10.320
Yeah. So I think one of the most important things is, and you sort of mentioned it before,
00:22:13.400
this kind of communication. So you really need to think about when you're going to communicate
00:22:17.960
about life admin logistics and thinking about maybe having a meeting or a regular time slot
00:22:24.040
every week where you kind of go through everything, like what's going on in the calendar,
00:22:28.440
what's on the to-do list, what's falling behind, what might we need help with,
00:22:33.080
what are the things we might want to talk about? Like if, you know, we're planning a trip,
00:22:36.800
do we need to talk about exactly where we're going to go or those sorts of things?
00:22:40.420
things. And so for us, we have a regular Sunday night meeting with one another. We have it over
00:22:47.080
a glass of wine if, you know, if we're feeling it or if it's a, if it's a sort of cup of tea kind
00:22:51.680
of night and we really go through all of those things. So check that the inbox is kind of inbox
00:22:56.960
zero, check in on what the to-do list items are and check in on the calendar for the next week.
00:23:02.140
And that really helps us stay synced and also helps us talk about something which is important is
00:23:06.860
like the standards of doing something. So I think one of the problems that people get into
00:23:12.260
challenges around is around expecting their partner to do it to the exact same standard or an exact
00:23:18.100
same way that they would do. So in those meetings, we can talk about, okay, well, what's an acceptable
00:23:23.820
standard for doing that? Like what will make us happy, make some compromises, and then I can kind
00:23:28.360
of let go of things and give it to my husband and vice versa so that we can kind of divide and conquer,
00:23:33.860
so to speak, because the reality is there's a lot of life admin in that family and you really want
00:23:38.620
to be able to divide it up and share it out. And those communications really help actually make
00:23:43.920
that happen. It's something my wife and I have done for several years now. We've had a podcast
00:23:48.240
about this and I've talked about it on the podcast a lot. We had the weekly marriage meeting as well.
00:23:52.060
We do it on Sunday. It takes about 20 minutes. Our four parts of the marriage meeting is we get
00:23:56.920
together. First, we express appreciation to each other. So we just say thank you for all the stuff that
00:24:02.020
each of us have done throughout the week. Then we do to-dos and that's just like the business stuff.
00:24:06.480
That's when we discuss life admin. Here's what needs to be done. These are the bills need to be
00:24:10.400
paid. Here's what needs to be prepared in the house. And then we have plan for good times. So this is good
00:24:15.720
times as a couple, good times as a family, and also good times as individually. And then we end with
00:24:22.460
big concerns. So there's like big concerns in the family. That's where we discuss that. And it's really
00:24:28.160
is a big game changer for us. Yeah. I mean, I think it's amazing that you do that. And I love those
00:24:34.680
additional elements. I guess our meeting tends to be a little bit more on the practical side. Maybe
00:24:39.100
that's because I'm a life admin expert, but yeah, it is a huge game changer in terms of, you know,
00:24:44.640
checking in on your own behavior and any resentments you might be holding about not sharing tasks fairly,
00:24:50.000
et cetera. And it really makes sure it brings it out in the open on a regular basis rather than kind of
00:24:54.340
storing up this inner resentment about, you know, if you are feeling like you're holding more of the
00:24:59.100
mental load, it's really an opportunity to kind of express that in a calm way, in a much more
00:25:04.220
productive way than perhaps in the heat of the moment. And then we also do a family meeting once
00:25:08.160
a week. We usually do that Tuesday night is our family meeting night. And that's the same sort of
00:25:12.940
thing. We just discuss like what's going well in the family, what can we improve, and then just discuss
00:25:17.500
the kids' schedule. Speaking of figuring out who does what, any advice on how you determine
00:25:24.300
who does what life admin? Because that can get complicated. And I think the way a lot of,
00:25:30.500
a lot of times how couples approach life admins, they just, they don't really talk about it. Like
00:25:34.240
one person decides to do this, the other person decides to do that, but neither of them are really
00:25:39.060
sure what is and isn't getting done. And I think that often happens because it kind of evolves as
00:25:44.360
your relationship evolves. And often in relationships, one person might have like certain
00:25:50.260
systems. And certainly, you know, in our marriage, I had kind of systems, but they were all really
00:25:56.420
designed for me. And they weren't really designed to let my husband in. And so when I guess we started
00:26:02.540
this whole journey, you know, I was had a lot of resentment that I was bearing all this mental load
00:26:08.100
and doing all of this life admin and feeling this huge burden. But the reality was a lot of it was on me,
00:26:14.140
it was my own behavior, this kind of over-functioning. Like I was over-functioning and then just feeling
00:26:19.720
resentment because my husband didn't know how to do it. But the reality is he didn't have access to
00:26:25.160
any of my systems. He didn't know all the things I was thinking about. So I think the first thing is
00:26:31.180
really to think about agreeing on some tools and systems that you're going to both use and like
00:26:36.140
the rules of the game of how you're going to use those systems. So things we already talked about
00:26:40.100
today, like a shared calendar, shared to-do lists, shared storage, shared email, all of those things
00:26:47.180
really set up systems that enable you to share. And then setting up those systems in and of itself
00:26:53.100
facilitates that discussion of how we're going to handle it when an email comes in, who's going to handle
00:26:57.940
it, you know, in what circumstances, etc. And so those are really the beginning of starting to think
00:27:04.040
about how you can better share the load. And it opens up those conversations for, oh, you know what,
00:27:08.920
I'll take charge of all of the utilities because, you know, I'm really good at that. And do you want
00:27:13.400
to take care of this? And really dividing it up so that it's much fairer and it's open and transparent
00:27:19.560
about who's doing what. And it really gives that conversation about that visibility of who is taking
00:27:24.900
care of what in the relationship. And then, yeah, having those regular meetings can just, as things come up
00:27:29.960
that are new, you can have the conversation like, all right, do you want this or do you want me to
00:27:33.840
take this? And then, yeah. Yeah. A hundred percent. Yeah. So another recommendation you have that I
00:27:39.740
really liked was keeping a folder that has information that you use regularly to fill out
00:27:46.660
forms like health insurance, doctor info, kids, you know, sports info. Tell us more about this
00:27:53.880
reference folder. Oh gosh. How much of your time is like dedicated? So much. I had this,
00:28:00.320
I was having a couple of months ago when I was, you know, filling out the application for our kids
00:28:03.980
school. And like, I filled this thing out before and they asked for the same information, but I had
00:28:08.800
to like go and like, okay, I got to find this thing in this file folder that I, I used last year. I don't,
00:28:14.960
I don't know where it's at. Yeah. A hundred percent. So there's a few different strategies here.
00:28:19.860
So you can either like save all this info in a spreadsheet, like in cloud storage, like in Google
00:28:25.220
drive or something. But for me, I actually have all of that information saved in my password manager
00:28:31.240
and then it's all shared with my husband. So that really gives a little bit more security because
00:28:35.980
it's got like MFA on it. And it also means that it's really easy to fill in online forms because
00:28:41.680
when you're filling in an online form, the password manager just automatically fills it in for you.
00:28:47.360
So really encourage you to think about setting up a system that allows that. And I've even got like
00:28:53.220
the secure, you know, even my password manager, I've even saved all the things like copies of my
00:28:58.300
passport, my driver's license, those sorts of things, because increasingly you need those to fill in
00:29:04.000
forms. So being able to have access to those documents on the go just means that a lot of those
00:29:09.240
form filling tasks can become two minute, two easy tasks because you've got the information at hand
00:29:14.160
and it really just takes that pain away. Oh yeah. The one that I see a lot and I always
00:29:20.020
hit myself in the head, like why haven't figured out how to do this? It's like when you're filling
00:29:23.320
out a form for your, you know, signing your kids up for a sport or a camp and they ask for the
00:29:28.400
doctor's info, like the name and the phone number. Address. And I'm like, oh, I have to get, okay,
00:29:34.600
go Google. Okay. What's the, okay. What's the name of the, okay. I got to Google it. And then,
00:29:38.160
okay. Then I, it'd just be easier if I just had like a, just in a spreadsheet,
00:29:41.760
all that information. Yeah. And emergency contacts is another one that I think I used
00:29:45.700
to fill out all the time. And I'm like, well, haven't I just written this down so I can just
00:29:49.200
copy paste or auto fill. And it is a huge time saver when you think about how many forms you've
00:29:54.400
got to fill in during your kid's life to get that nailed early on. Yeah. One thing I did do,
00:29:59.380
so my in-laws take our kids on a vacation every now and then take them on a trip. So I actually
00:30:04.780
created a folder with like documents that they'll need and that my mother-in-law has access to that.
00:30:09.720
That was nice. Cause I don't think about that anymore. Cause it used to be like, I have to
00:30:13.040
get gathered together every single time. Now there's like a folder there. So I, I, I have
00:30:17.500
learned, but I need to, I need to do better. So you mentioned paperwork. You're big on eliminating
00:30:25.020
as much paperwork as possible. And you said you just scan it with your phone. Is that all you do?
00:30:29.640
So if you get like a bill that's paper, you just scan it and then it goes somewhere.
00:30:33.680
Yeah. So, I mean, I just use Google drive super easy. You can scan directly from the app straight
00:30:38.840
into the folder. So just go paperless, really move everything to the cloud. It means that you'll
00:30:44.480
be able to access it from anywhere, anytime. And it really just saves that. I don't know about you,
00:30:50.640
but I used to have a pile of filing. I was never quite sure whether I should keep it or not keep
00:30:55.600
it. And so now I just kind of keep it. We have a shared Google drive between my husband and I.
00:31:01.620
And so we just add things as we go, makes tax time super easy because all of our receipts are
00:31:07.020
saved in a folder. So yeah, it's been a huge game changer in terms of, you know, just reducing one
00:31:13.020
more task to do in terms of managing paperwork. So you have a chapter about meal planning and
00:31:18.760
cooking. And this, this part of life admin can just suck up so much of your time. Cooking can take a long
00:31:25.380
time sometimes, but it's like preparing for meals can just take up so much time. Any advice on how to
00:31:31.380
streamline meal prep? Yeah. So I think a couple of things there. I think the first thing is to think
00:31:38.140
about establishing like this habit of meal planning. So it, whether it be once a week or every couple of
00:31:45.420
days, depending on, you know, your lifestyle and how many groceries you can buy and thinking about when
00:31:50.620
you're going to do it in your calendar and maybe even scheduling it in so that, you know,
00:31:54.920
you're going to do it then and thinking about, okay, when does that fit with when I'm going to
00:31:59.380
do grocery shopping and that kind of thing. So that you make sure that it's a habit that happens,
00:32:04.800
you know, you can easily aimlessly wander around the grocery store, like picking things up, which
00:32:10.020
can just be a huge time where sand actually, you know, it can often result in a lot of food waste.
00:32:15.660
And then once you've got that habit, thinking about putting that meal plan into a tool that other
00:32:20.760
members of your family can see. So going back to that kind of sharing again. So in our house,
00:32:25.900
it's actually, that's something we do have analog. It's a, you know, magnetized list on our fridge.
00:32:30.360
And that means that the teenagers can also contribute to the cooking, not just the adults.
00:32:35.220
And that meal plan takes into account your household schedule, because there's no point
00:32:39.980
having a meal plan, you know, to cook a complicated meal on a night when you've got three extracurricular
00:32:46.080
activities. You kind of really need to factor your meal plan around your schedule. And then in terms
00:32:51.500
of what to put on it, I think you can sort of waste a lot of mental space trying to think about,
00:32:56.860
oh my God, what are we going to have this Tuesday? So one of the things that we suggest is maybe
00:33:01.140
thinking about having themes for certain nights, because it can just give you one less decision
00:33:05.440
to make. I know a lot of people like to embrace Taco Tuesday, but you might want to also think about,
00:33:11.040
you know, like Monday night might be Italian and Wednesday night might be chicken and Thursday night
00:33:15.440
might be pasta. And then it just means, okay, well, I've got a repertoire within that category.
00:33:21.020
And it's just, you know, I can easily think of something if I've got a category,
00:33:25.080
it really reduces the sort of mental load of thinking what to cook.
00:33:28.720
And then, yeah, you'll have that on the schedule and your kids will never have to ask you,
00:33:33.880
Yeah. Well, they can have a look for themselves. And on our meal plan, we also have who's cooking.
00:33:38.440
And so we've divided it up amongst the four of us and each of the teens gets a night to cook as
00:33:42.940
well. And so that really shares the load of that. And so I've definitely embraced handing more of the
00:33:48.840
household chores to them, the older that they've got.
00:33:51.860
So with the grocery shopping, that's just like, you just set aside a day for that,
00:33:55.200
that you just try to do it all in one day for the week.
00:33:58.360
Yeah. So in our house, we do our meal plan on a Saturday morning, and then I do my grocery
00:34:04.020
shopping online immediately after that. And the groceries arrive the next day. And so that means I can
00:34:09.620
do it on a Saturday when the teens are at home and I can say, what do you want to cook on your night?
00:34:13.840
So that means that, you know, they're contributing in terms of that. And we do an online shop. I've got
00:34:19.400
a, you know, saved shopping list in my online app. So I can literally get, you know, my groceries done
00:34:24.480
in five, 10 minutes. So the whole thing can be over in 15 minutes and we're set up for the week.
00:34:29.320
We all know what we're doing. Meal plans displayed on the fridge. And it really just reduces any of that
00:34:33.880
friction around thinking, oh my God, what are we going to have for dinner tonight?
00:34:36.900
It's a 15 minute a week task that really just reduces my mental load considerably.
00:34:42.860
Yeah. I like the idea of having team nights. That just reduces a lot of having to think about
00:34:46.920
things. We're going to have to do that. So we talked about kids, how it can increase your life
00:34:51.480
admin significantly. You know, when they're born, there's life admin, but I feel like I've something
00:34:56.000
that my wife and I have been noticing as our kids have gotten older, the life admin has just gotten
00:35:00.840
more and more with them because they're signing up for sports. They're doing camps. There's all this
00:35:05.120
stuff at school. Anything that you found useful there in managing your kids' life admin?
00:35:12.980
Interesting. I think we've already talked about a few of them. So definitely the visible weekly
00:35:17.160
schedule. So depending on how old your kids are, whether that's, you know, analog, as you said,
00:35:21.620
like the weekly planner on the wall. So everyone knows where they need to be and can start to like
00:35:26.200
get themselves organized as they get older. And the forms, oh my God, the forms of children.
00:35:32.260
So really thinking about not only, you know, getting all that information set up so that
00:35:36.920
they're easy to complete, but also maybe dividing up the form burden between you in terms of,
00:35:43.380
you know, you do soccer and your wife might do ballet or whatever it is so that, you know,
00:35:47.960
you know who's responsible for what in terms of those things. Another thing that I think you can find
00:35:54.980
is with kids comes a lot of stuff. So really thinking about how you're going to deal with
00:36:01.160
like keepsakes. So items like art or other certificates and prizes. So thinking about
00:36:07.660
setting up some sort of system of how you're going to keep those in an orderly fashion and whether that
00:36:13.960
be keeping the physical item or for some people have been just taking a photo of it so that they can
00:36:18.220
remember it and let it go. I think that can be a huge thing. And I guess related to that is really
00:36:24.660
thinking about having a regular rhythm of decluttering. So when you think about the, you know,
00:36:31.460
they grow out of their clothes, they grow out of their toys. So how are you going to start to have
00:36:37.060
a rhythm of, is it every season we go through the wardrobe or, or, you know, every Christmas we go
00:36:42.800
through the toys so that you can really make sure that you don't get inundated with all of the stuff
00:36:47.780
and that you share it with people and hand it on to others who can use it rather than, you know,
00:36:53.360
your house piling up. And, you know, this is in the gray area. Is that a chore or is it life admin?
00:36:59.440
There's quite a bit of life admin involved in potentially selling things or figuring out where
00:37:04.300
to donate it to. So I do think that decluttering is one of those ones that falls in the gray area of
00:37:10.120
whether it's life admin or a chore. Yeah. I've done that with the kids art. So, you know,
00:37:14.240
when your kids are little, they're always bringing home art and you hang it up on the wall. There
00:37:18.740
just comes a point where it's just like, okay, I got to take this down because it's just gotten too
00:37:21.520
much. Yeah. I took pictures of them before I threw them in the trash can. So I still got it,
00:37:27.000
which is nice. Yeah. I mean, you can't keep them all. So you really got to embrace that reasonably
00:37:31.960
early on because, you know, you can't keep the first piece of hair, the first pair of shoes,
00:37:35.940
the first, you know, and so you've got to decide how much is important to keep and what
00:37:40.100
you are going to keep, what's your system so that you can easily add to it over time.
00:37:44.220
You said your kids are teenagers? Yeah. At what point did you start offloading
00:37:48.500
their life admin to them? Like, hey, you got to fill out this form now. I'm not filling out this
00:37:54.000
form. Yeah. So I think that you can give them the sort of what I call the junior version of the
00:37:59.620
game, if that makes sense. So you can kind of adjust it as they go through. So if you do happen
00:38:04.520
to have a paper form, you can get them to fill in what they can if their handwriting's good enough
00:38:09.220
or if it's a digital form, same thing. You can say, I have got this school form here for you.
00:38:13.740
Can you start doing part of it? Because really that's just helping them, you know, teaching them
00:38:18.860
what it means to be part of that. I already mentioned, you know, we've got the kids contributing
00:38:23.720
both to deciding what they want to cook and then, you know, cooking one meal a week. And now that my
00:38:29.360
kids are a bit older, certainly the digital calendar, if they want to go somewhere, they're responsible for
00:38:33.620
checking the calendar, making sure it can work, adding it in so that therefore they're responsible
00:38:39.100
for making that happen. And if they can see that there's a clash, so in particular, my daughter,
00:38:45.320
she's got a bit of an active social life and extracurricular. She'll go, oh, I really want to
00:38:50.000
go to this party. I can see mum and dad are going out. I'll be responsible for finding a ride. So she
00:38:55.620
will contact her friends and organise a ride. And then she'll note that in the calendar that she's going
00:38:59.640
to so-and-so's place and she's organised this ride. So that just means it's one less thing for
00:39:04.700
us to organise. And it's really helping her learn like the realities of life and how to organise
00:39:09.400
yourself. You have a section about the life admin that comes when you're doing comparison shopping
00:39:15.680
for various products and services like a new car, insurance, cell phone service. This is really
00:39:22.740
interesting because your book is geared towards an Australian audience. So I learned a lot about
00:39:26.600
how the Australian insurance industry works. And that was really interesting. I had no clue
00:39:33.080
about that. But what is some general advice? Because I know when we're thinking about buying
00:39:37.420
a new product, you get sucked down this rabbit hole. I was like, well, should I get this one
00:39:43.060
or that one? And I read all the reviews and you spend two days trying to decide on a vacuum
00:39:49.780
cleaner. Any advice there to streamline that? Yeah. So I think the first thing is really thinking
00:39:57.540
about what's your criteria. So thinking about establishing that criteria before you kind of
00:40:03.320
dig too much into the comparison shopping. Because, you know, to make a decision, it's much easier if you
00:40:09.660
know what good looks like. So if you think about, okay, what is going to be my criteria upon which I'm going
00:40:15.680
to decide? And then I actually think you absolutely have to write it down. So get yourself out a piece
00:40:20.780
of paper or, you know, a spreadsheet and put the criteria down the left. So set yourself up a comparison
00:40:26.440
table because that really helps you be able to pick the best offer or the best option rather than going
00:40:33.360
through each option one at a time and you can get really confused. So I think that's probably tip
00:40:37.840
number one. And I think the second one is really to think about limiting yourself to how many you're going
00:40:44.940
to compare. Because in lots of things, there are, you know, infinite possible options. You start to
00:40:52.100
go down this rabbit hole of comparing absolutely every product out there. So really try and think
00:40:57.620
about using some sort of search to find the sort of three that you're going to compare and then just,
00:41:03.980
you know, picking three options. Because the research shows that the more options you compare,
00:41:09.700
the more confused and dissatisfied you'll actually be. And often when you compare a lot,
00:41:14.940
you actually might not make any choice. So really try and limit yourself to how many you're going to
00:41:20.500
compare. And then, you know, particularly if it's not a high stakes decision, compare three,
00:41:25.200
move on, and that will stand you in good stead.
00:41:28.900
Yeah. Something I'll do too is I'll, when it's like a big consumer purchase, like an appliance,
00:41:34.320
I go to consumerreports.org. I don't know if this works. Does this work in Australia?
00:41:38.280
Yeah. So we have something called choice, which is the same kind of thing. So yeah,
00:41:43.680
Yeah. I like that. Cause it's, you know, it's, it's a nonprofit, it's independent.
00:41:47.960
I feel like if you Google like best pillow, you know, you're going to be sent to some website,
00:41:53.180
like good housekeeping. And it's going to be a bunch of affiliate links. They're just going to
00:41:57.080
try to sell you an expensive pillow so they can make some money. So with consumer reports,
00:42:01.400
I can trust it a little bit more. So I've, I've used that to narrow my, my options significantly.
00:42:06.240
I think that's been helpful. So I like that. Yeah. Get three. And then you got to be a
00:42:09.580
satisficer, like what's good enough. And then just go with that.
00:42:13.360
Yeah, definitely. Don't try and find that elusive optimal solution because you might still be here
00:42:18.740
next year. So we've got some friends that have a saying, having fun is a lot of work. And the idea
00:42:26.180
is that if you want to make memories with vacations and outings, there's a lot of admin you have to do
00:42:31.000
to make that happen. So what are some tactics people can use to take the tedium out of our vacation
00:42:36.920
planning? Yeah. So I think when it comes to holidays, like talking to an expert here,
00:42:41.980
it's kind of like my quest in life is to travel as much as possible. So for me, you know, my personal
00:42:47.860
advice is this kind of real merit in taking a year long view on your holiday or vacation plans,
00:42:53.700
because the people, you know, who are always off doing something fabulous are probably the people
00:42:59.160
who made that plan a year ago. So planning for the sort of rolling year ahead lets you sort of do the
00:43:05.400
groundwork early, you get better choices, you get better prices, and also it gives you something
00:43:10.820
to look forward to. So I like to always book my next holiday the minute I get back from one.
00:43:18.080
So as soon as I get back, it's kind of like the next weekend, my hour of power is dedicated to
00:43:23.060
booking my next holiday, even if that's a year out. Because actually the research shows that
00:43:28.000
anticipating those happy moments or those holidays is actually gives you more good feelings and
00:43:33.940
actually thinking about past happiness. And so I love to have the anticipation of the next trip
00:43:39.900
coming up. So I think that's probably my number one tip. And I think secondly, it's really like
00:43:45.360
share the load. So divide the tasks between you because it can be a lot of tasks. So I book the
00:43:51.840
flights, my husband will book the accommodation. And if that feels overwhelming, as we sort of mentioned
00:43:57.020
before, there are still travel agents out there. There's like specialist travel agents. We used one when
00:44:01.740
we came to Disney. It was a huge win. They knew exactly what to do. They helped us with all the
00:44:06.300
hacks. So think about using a specialist travel agent or a travel agent to just, you know, you
00:44:12.020
might pay a little bit more, but this is where you've kind of got to decide what's the most important to
00:44:16.300
you in your season of life. Is it, you know, spending a bit more money or saving a bit more time?
00:44:21.920
And if saving time is really what's, you know, find a good travel agent and they'll look after you and
00:44:28.160
What about planning social events with friends? That's another thing that can be tedious.
00:44:33.840
Oh yeah. And I mean, you know, when you're the life admin expert, everyone expects you to be the
00:44:39.360
one who's organizing all of the things. So for me, I really, I try and batch the planning. So,
00:44:46.540
you know, if I'm going to be the one organizing it, I'm really thinking about, okay, what suits me?
00:44:51.100
What really works for my calendar? And then I'm looking ahead, you know, maybe a month,
00:44:55.180
two months ahead, and I'm firing off a bunch of emails, texts, you know, WhatsApp messages
00:45:00.020
to my various groups of friends. I'm being really specific with the date and time and venue that
00:45:06.280
suits me. And I'm really saying, this is what's happening. Are you in or you're not in? And kind
00:45:12.160
of letting go of the idea that you have to find, particularly when you're thinking about group
00:45:16.260
events that you just don't have to find a date that suits everyone. There'll always be another time.
00:45:21.000
And if you've batched it and sent out a whole bunch of things, all in like your one hour of
00:45:26.580
power, that means that if a few things don't come off, then, you know, you're not going to be
00:45:30.580
disappointed. So, you know, if your calendar's feeling a bit empty or it's kind of not working
00:45:35.600
for you in terms of the sorts of things you're being invited to, that's where you should take
00:45:39.600
control in terms of batching out those invitations. And I guess going back to what we talked about
00:45:45.420
before, thinking about having a reference list of maybe people you want to catch up with or,
00:45:51.000
you know, things you want to do. And that can help you kind of really think, okay,
00:45:54.960
if you've thought about it in advance, you can start to really think, you know, I've spent some
00:45:59.180
time thinking about what's going to really enrich me. And I'll use that reference list to design my
00:46:04.540
social life rather than just let my social life happen to me.
00:46:07.880
My wife and I, we host a Christmas party or it could be a New Year's party. We've done New Year's too,
00:46:11.960
but we've done it so many times that we've established some check, like having the checklist of,
00:46:15.100
we know we've got to do these things. And then also a reference list of the supplies that we have
00:46:20.780
has come in handy as well. Yeah, that's a great tip. And certainly,
00:46:25.140
I think one of those things is I love having those like regular social events that happen
00:46:29.980
every year in and out, those kind of traditions. We actually in Australia have what we call Christmas
00:46:35.460
in July, because obviously it's hot for Christmas in us in December. And so if you want to have kind of
00:46:41.960
that like, you know, open fire kind of cold Christmas feeling, we have it in July. And we
00:46:47.560
host a Christmas in July every year with the same bunch of friends. And it's a great tradition,
00:46:51.620
just kind of happens on autopilot. So yeah, I really love that too.
00:46:56.660
Well, Dinah, this has been a great conversation. Where can people go to learn more about your work?
00:47:00.780
You can find us on our website at lifeadminlifehacks.com. And you can also find us at the
00:47:06.640
same handle for Instagram and Facebook. Fantastic. Well, Dinah Rowe Roberts,
00:47:10.980
thanks for your time. It's been a pleasure. Thanks so much for having me.
00:47:14.860
My guest today was Dinah Rowe Roberts. You can find more information about our work at our website,
00:47:18.060
lifeadminlifehacks.com. Also check out our show notes at aom.is slash lifeadmin,
00:47:22.740
where you can find links to resources where you delve deeper into this topic.
00:47:32.780
Well, that wraps up another edition of the AOM podcast. Make sure to check out our website,
00:47:36.640
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00:47:40.420
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00:47:43.700
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00:47:53.700
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00:47:56.860
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