The Art of Manliness - October 18, 2021


Time Management for Mortals


Episode Stats

Length

47 minutes

Words per Minute

194.1504

Word Count

9,238

Sentence Count

453

Hate Speech Sentences

1


Summary

In his new book, 4,000 Weeks: Time Management for Mortals, Oliver Berkman argues that a philosophy of time management that is more realistic and more humane is the best way to make the most of the average human lifespan. He explains why engaging in efficiency for its own sake only creates more stuff to do and why recognizing you can never clear the decks of your daily tasks nor get everything done can actually help you focus on the things that matter most.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 Brett McKay here and welcome to another edition of the Art of Manliness podcast. Now a lot
00:00:11.000 of ink has been spilled on time management and productivity hacking. I mean, you can
00:00:14.280 find endless tips on how to master your workflow, tame your inbox, slay your to-do list. Far
00:00:18.580 less examined, however, is the philosophy that underlies these strategies. My guest
00:00:22.440 says that when you do examine that philosophy, you find it doesn't actually align with lived
00:00:26.360 experience. His name is Oliver Berkman, and in his book 4,000 Weeks Time Management for
00:00:30.480 Mortals, he forwards a philosophy of time management that is more realistic and more humane. Today
00:00:35.380 on the show, Oliver makes the case for a kind of contrarian way to make the most of the 4,000
00:00:39.180 weeks of the average human lifespan, beginning with why he reached a point in his own life
00:00:42.620 where he realized that standard methods of productivity hacking were futile and just made
00:00:46.320 him feel busier and less happy. We then get into the fact that we'd like to do an infinite
00:00:49.900 number of things but are finite beings, and how this contrast creates an anxiety that
00:00:53.780 we attempt to soothe and deny through productivity techniques. We then discuss the problem of
00:00:57.680 treating time as a thing, a resource that's separate from the self, and how one antidote
00:01:01.600 to this mindset is to do things for pure enjoyment alone. Oliver explains why engaging in efficiency
00:01:06.420 for its own sake only creates more stuff to do, and why recognizing you can never clear the
00:01:10.560 decks of your daily tasks nor get everything done can actually help you focus on the things
00:01:14.080 that matter most. We enter a conversation with why really digging into a deep philosophy of time
00:01:18.020 by facing up to its stakes and engaging in what Oliver calls cosmic insignificance therapy
00:01:22.660 can allow you to live a bolder, more meaningful life. Also, I mentioned a poem during our conversation
00:01:27.340 that I decided to recite full at the end of the show, so be sure to listen to the end so you can
00:01:31.080 hear it. You can find a link to that poem in our show notes, which can be found at aom.is
00:01:35.220 slash 4,000 weeks.
00:01:43.640 All right. Oliver Berkman, welcome to the show.
00:01:46.780 Thank you very much for inviting me.
00:01:47.900 So you got a new book out. It's called 4,000 Weeks, Time Management for Mortals. And you take a deep
00:01:55.260 dive into philosophy, psychology, sociology, history, religion, to suss out a philosophy
00:02:03.260 of time management. I think it's a humane philosophy of time management. And you make the case in the
00:02:10.800 book at the beginning that our popular idea of time management that we have, like getting things done,
00:02:15.840 in block zero, being efficient, is that it's paradoxical because it allows us to get more
00:02:22.780 things done. I mean, these systems do work to help you do a lot more. But at the same time,
00:02:28.820 they cause us to feel busier and busier. When did you start noticing this paradox in your own life?
00:02:35.180 Well, I mean, for years, I wrote a column for the Guardian newspaper about psychology, productivity,
00:02:41.160 science of happiness, and all the rest of it. And one of the things I got to do there was indulge
00:02:45.920 my, at that point, lifelong interest in productivity systems, in sort of trying to find the technique
00:02:53.320 that would make me feel perfectly in control of everything so that I could handle anything that
00:02:59.320 might be thrown at me, you know, fulfill all the work ambitions I had while making plenty of time for
00:03:05.840 all the other things I wanted to do, and sort of never getting there, right? Because you're sort of
00:03:10.600 in this mode of constantly feeling like it's next week or next month or the next system that you
00:03:17.780 implement, or that you're going to wake up tomorrow with 10 times as much self-discipline
00:03:23.440 than you've ever demonstrated in your life before up to today. And so it's that sort of gradual process
00:03:30.180 of realizing that I wasn't going to get there that way. And that in the meantime, what happened was
00:03:37.680 I got busier. I mean, yeah, I did process more things. I did get more things done. But firstly,
00:03:44.780 I didn't get this kind of peace of mind, this sense of tranquility with respect to time.
00:03:49.840 And then secondly, they weren't necessarily the most important things. In fact, and I argue about,
00:03:54.200 I'll use in the book that, you know, there's a reason to believe that you're going to do more and more of
00:03:59.340 the least important things, the more you focus on just becoming more efficient and sort of productive
00:04:05.480 for its own sake. So that was a sort of slow realization. And then I talk also about having
00:04:11.680 this epiphany sitting on a park bench on a winter morning in Brooklyn, where I lived then, and just
00:04:18.020 sort of suddenly realizing like, oh, none of this is ever going to work. Like I'm never going to reach
00:04:23.220 this level of total control and, and sort of security with respect to time that I'm, that I'm
00:04:31.040 fighting for here. And how sort of liberating it was to see that I had been trying to do something that
00:04:37.460 is kind of, I think, inherently impossible for human beings to do.
00:04:42.240 And I've experienced the same thing you've experienced where I went through that. I think
00:04:45.100 every person, if you're like, if you're a modern human being living in liquid modernity,
00:04:50.160 hyper-individualistic, hyper-capitalist society, like that you, you go through a productivity phase.
00:04:55.740 I think everyone does that. It's a, it's a rite of passage at this point. And then, yeah,
00:04:59.300 you finally realize, man, none of this works. And so you're always looking for the next best thing.
00:05:03.920 And one of the cases you make in the book is that part of the problem that underlies all of
00:05:09.460 our frustrations with popular time management paradigms is that it causes us to think of ourselves
00:05:16.620 as limitless while ignoring the fact that we are finite beings. So how does thinking of ourselves
00:05:22.460 as limitless, how do you think that makes us miserable?
00:05:26.460 Great. Yeah, no, that's, that's exactly the sort of underlying thing I'm, I'm trying to get at.
00:05:31.480 I think that we are made deeply uncomfortable by all the ways in which we're limited, especially the
00:05:36.960 ways in which we're limited when it comes to time. We only have so much in a day. We only have so much
00:05:42.900 in a life. And we don't know how much that's going to be. We can only focus on one thing at a time.
00:05:48.100 And even more profoundly, I think we can't control, we can't be in control of how our time unfolds in
00:05:54.840 the way that we would like to be. In other words, you know, you, you launch into some creative project,
00:05:59.640 for example, you can't know it'll work out. You can't know you will not encounter insurmountable
00:06:05.280 obstacles. You can't know this all in advance. So we're sort of vulnerable in time in a way that I
00:06:11.180 think, and to time in a way that makes us really uncomfortable. And so we do what human beings
00:06:18.540 since the beginning of history have done when they feel uncomfortable about something, which is to
00:06:25.120 pursue methods of emotional avoidance, ways of not feeling the discomfort. And I think that time
00:06:32.300 management and productivity techniques, you know, used wrongly in the wrong spirit are absolutely an
00:06:37.840 example of this kind of emotional avoidance. They can fuel this illusion that you're en route to
00:06:46.160 this position of limitlessness, this kind of state of perfect optimization where you would never have
00:06:51.340 to make tough choices about what to spend your time on. You would never have to disappoint anybody who
00:06:56.200 might have any expectations of you. Any obligation you might feel or goal you might set, there'll be a way
00:07:03.360 to get that done too. Of course, it's never happening in the present moment because we are limited and
00:07:08.700 it's not actually possible, but you're sort of kept comfortable in a way by chasing this feeling that
00:07:16.420 it's going to happen and that you're almost there. And so I think, you know, all sorts of aspects of
00:07:22.840 human culture get drafted into this kind of emotional avoidance in many different domains, but productivity
00:07:28.700 culture is just one of them. And the one that I was particularly using, I guess, for many years for
00:07:36.780 just that kind of avoidance of the experience of reality, I guess.
00:07:42.880 And, you know, you go to philosophy a lot and as I was reading that section about this idea of
00:07:46.860 limitlessness and but we're finite beings, it reminded me of Kierkegaard. He said that was like the human
00:07:51.400 condition. We are the infinite and the finite combined in one. So, you know, humans have, unlike other
00:07:56.940 animals, humans have the capacity to think about eternity or forever. They can see lots of choices.
00:08:02.240 Animals, you know, they're not really thinking about too much. But the problem is, yeah, Kierkegaard
00:08:07.680 says that's the source of a lot of our anxiety or our angst. We want to do all this stuff, limitless,
00:08:12.980 but like we are finite beings. We have to figure out how to manage that paradox.
00:08:17.400 Right. That's exactly it. And I mean, you know, just to sort of bring Kierkegaard down to earth in a
00:08:24.100 sort of maybe disrespectful to Kierkegaard way, but yeah, it's like on the level of your daily
00:08:29.580 productivity, you can imagine an infinite number of things that you might want to do. You can feel
00:08:36.500 an infinite number of obligations or duties. You can, you know, set all sorts of visions for where you
00:08:43.860 want to be. And there's no limit to those things that happen in the, in the world of your consciousness,
00:08:47.500 but there's obviously very, very severe limits when it comes to your time, your stamina, all the rest
00:08:55.620 of it. And yeah, there's a sort of constant disconnect there. So I don't think that you can
00:09:00.700 ever really get away from that sort of anxious situation. I think that's something inherently
00:09:04.860 anxiety inducing about this. I think Kierkegaard said that too, but you can choose whether you're
00:09:11.260 going to try to sort of dull the pain completely and just end up wasting time as a result, or whether
00:09:17.420 you're going to make some effort to sort of lean in to that discomfort in the service of carrying out
00:09:23.740 some, some goals that, that you really care about. Yeah. I think what your book's trying to do is,
00:09:28.200 is trying to help readers embrace their finitude a bit more. Like don't discount the infinite,
00:09:34.700 but you have to like, you have to wrangle it a little bit and just realize you have, you have a limit
00:09:39.380 you have to work with. And I think what you're saying is a lot of time management techniques.
00:09:43.040 It encourages us to think that, oh, we can get more and more done as much as we want. We can
00:09:47.140 have it all. And you're saying, yeah, probably. Well, no, that's not going to happen.
00:09:51.720 Right. And I just want to sort of say something in defense of some of those techniques. I think a lot
00:09:55.140 of this is to do with the spirit in which you try to integrate them into your life. There are
00:10:00.380 certainly some time management gurus who are guilty of kind of promoting this notion that
00:10:04.760 full control and mastery over time in a way that humans, I think, can't have is, is on the cards.
00:10:14.000 But lots of these techniques are perfectly useful. If what, if all you're using them for is to kind
00:10:18.580 of organize your day a bit more, make slightly better choices between competing priorities.
00:10:24.100 The problem is that I think we, lots of us anyway, we sort of glom onto them as if we're going to
00:10:29.720 achieve some kind of salvation through them. And the salvation in question is actually, you know,
00:10:35.040 if it were real, it would involve somehow getting outside of reality, getting outside of the situation
00:10:40.540 in which we all inevitably are in.
00:10:43.700 And one of the things you do too, is you do some, some genealogy of our approach to time to figure
00:10:49.180 out what it is, like, how did we get this time management system or these systems in place,
00:10:53.680 this idea of time that makes us think we can control time. And you go back in history,
00:10:59.280 and this idea that we can manage time or control time is a relatively new idea. It's a, it's a very
00:11:06.580 modern idea. You go, if you go back to medieval serfs, they never would ever thought, they don't
00:11:12.100 want to cross their mind as time as a resource. Like, so how did, like, if you went back to your
00:11:16.400 great, great, great, whatever grandfather who was a serf in England, how do they think of time?
00:11:22.360 And how does that differ from how we think of time? And how did we get to where we are now?
00:11:26.100 I mean, yeah, I mean, it's not a straight linear story, because you certainly see
00:11:32.800 very modern ideas about time expressed in the ancient world. And on the other hand,
00:11:38.580 I think there are probably some indigenous cultures even today who have a very, an approach to time
00:11:44.280 that feels more like something that I'm talking about as belonging to pre-industrial
00:11:48.060 cultures. But it's just this whole incredibly basic idea that time is a thing. I mean, it's very
00:11:58.000 hard to express this. And in the book, I end up using this phrase, you know, thinking of time as
00:12:01.720 a thing, meaning as some kind of separate entity from yourself, not merely the medium in which your
00:12:09.580 life unfolds. But somehow, a resource to be maximized, or something you have to be careful
00:12:16.900 not to waste. I think whenever anybody today visualizes time in the context of work, say,
00:12:24.260 you know, do I have enough time to do these three things by Friday, you're thinking,
00:12:28.360 you're imagining a calendar or a yardstick or a clock face, this whole idea that time is this
00:12:34.380 objectified thing that you then have to deal with, or that can sort of hound you. None of that
00:12:40.940 would have arisen in the first place to a peasant in early medieval England. I think they would,
00:12:46.980 we've got some reason to believe from the historical record, they would have just,
00:12:53.640 they would have lived in what anthropologists call task orientation, right? This idea that the
00:12:57.940 rhythms of life just emerge from the things that you're doing in your life and in your work,
00:13:02.600 that it's not like you make a schedule, and you can decide where to slot things in. It's like the
00:13:07.940 cows need milking when they need milking. And the harvest needs harvesting when it's ready to be
00:13:13.400 harvested. And a productivity guru who arrived on a medieval farm and said, look, it's really useful to
00:13:20.220 batch your tasks. So why don't you do all the milking of the cows for the month today to get it out of
00:13:26.220 the way? Obviously, that's absolutely absurd. You're too yoked into nature and the rhythms of
00:13:32.000 reality to make that kind of decision, to have that kind of dictatorial control over time. And I think
00:13:39.740 most of us have some experience of this today. It's just not the norm anymore. Anyone who has been
00:13:45.440 the parent of a very small child, a newborn, I think, has experienced being in that world where
00:13:50.700 things just happen. The baby needs to be fed when it needs to be fed, and diapers need to be changed
00:13:55.800 when they need to be changed. It's not something you can ever hope, at least at the beginning,
00:13:59.400 to schedule. And I think that arises in lots of other contexts as well. So all I really wanted
00:14:03.800 to do here was to just say, hey, let's at least remember that our main way of relating to time
00:14:11.600 today is not the only option. It is historically contingent. It is something we can sort of hope
00:14:17.840 to get outside of at least for some hours of the day or some weeks of the year, which is not the same
00:14:23.920 as saying. I think we should live like medieval peasants because that is a terrible, terrible life
00:14:27.920 in pretty much every other respect.
00:14:30.320 And yeah, and this transition to thinking of time as a resource, like I said, it sort of went through
00:14:34.720 different cycles. Like monks were involved, then capitalism in 19th century where we shifted from
00:14:40.880 task-oriented work to you're going to work by the hour. And then now we're kind of stuck with that.
00:14:46.380 But what is it about thinking of time as a resource, right? As opposed to thinking of time as just being,
00:14:52.100 I don't know, not even like it's not something to be used. It just is. How does thinking of time
00:14:57.800 as a resource, how does that make us miserable, you think?
00:15:01.700 Well, I mean, firstly, caveat, I think it's probably essential to almost all the achievements
00:15:07.240 of the modern world. So I don't think it's something we can just get rid of. But I think
00:15:10.900 it does have this strong set of problems as well. And, you know, there are a number of different
00:15:17.560 ones, but the sort of fundamental one, I think, is just that this instrumental approach to time,
00:15:23.400 this idea that you are in a use relationship with time, and you're always on some level asking,
00:15:28.860 am I making the best use of my time? Or, you know, sometimes it's more in certain times in history
00:15:36.040 as well, you know, employers asking how to get the best use of time out of their employees,
00:15:39.780 whatever. It broadly has this effect of postponing the value of life, right? It makes everything you're
00:15:49.320 doing now valuable solely in terms of what it's leading up to. And it makes that, this is a thing
00:15:59.680 that makes it very, very difficult to sort of extract a sense of meaning from life in the present,
00:16:03.700 because you've always got, you know, an eye on the future to the moment when this is all going to
00:16:08.440 deliver or fail to deliver in some future accomplishment, which of course never happens
00:16:13.480 because the future remains in the future. Lots of other, you know, different ways in which it,
00:16:19.740 in which this causes problems. But I think it leads overall to the sense that you're in a kind of a
00:16:24.360 struggle with time, and you've got to try to subdue it somehow, got to try to get on top of it or out
00:16:31.300 front of it, whatever spatial metaphor you want to use. And the problem is that's always going to be
00:16:39.100 a recipe for a kind of never-ending anxiety and stress, because actually you're not really relating
00:16:48.080 to time, you're relating to a certain set of ideas about time. And the problem with declaring war on
00:16:53.800 time is that eventually time is always going to win that struggle. And it just sort of keeps going
00:17:02.540 on regardless, no matter what you do with it, if that makes sense.
00:17:06.180 No, that makes sense. And I really related this idea of, you know, treating time as a resource
00:17:10.420 causes you to make, treat time as an instrument. And because a lot of time management is all about
00:17:16.380 planning for the future. And I think if you've grown up in any Western country, you're kind of set on to
00:17:23.240 this. I mean, it's like in the culture, it just seeps into you. Like you go to, like the idea is
00:17:27.360 you, you got to get good grades in high school so you can get to a good college. And then you got to
00:17:32.760 get in a good college so you can get the good job. And then you got to get a good job so you can,
00:17:36.560 you know, be an attractive mate and get a good house. So it's, you're never, you're always doing
00:17:41.000 something for something else and you're never, and it just feels like, it's like a never-ending,
00:17:45.060 it's like the rat race. It's a never-ending conveyor belt. And it just makes you feel terrible.
00:17:49.200 And then you always reach that point. It's like, once you achieve all those things,
00:17:51.900 it's like, all right, what now? What do I do now? Like what, what happens now?
00:17:56.380 Yeah, completely. And of course we do need to do those things. I would be a complete hypocrite
00:18:00.540 if I claimed that I sort of, you know, don't live many swathes of my life with a strong focus on
00:18:08.100 the future and, and instrumentalizing the present moment. But there's two things. Firstly,
00:18:13.380 it doesn't need to be the sole focus that you take to any moment of experience, I don't think.
00:18:19.840 And secondly, it's very useful, I argue in the book, to try to make sure that there is something
00:18:25.560 in your life, some activity, some, some pastime that is just for itself alone, that, that is,
00:18:33.800 that, that resists that instrumentalization. You know, these are things we tend to think of as,
00:18:39.900 as hobbies, which is a sort of, in many, in many circles, I think is a sort of a slightly embarrassing,
00:18:45.860 cringe-making kind of idea to deliberately cultivate a hobby, which has no purpose other
00:18:52.160 than itself. But I think it's cringe-making because it's so antithetical to the, to the
00:18:57.160 prevailing message of the culture, right? Which is that nothing is valuable unless it is for some
00:19:02.060 future, some future purpose, preferably financial profit. So yeah, I think it's just something to pay
00:19:08.800 attention to and make sure you don't eliminate entirely from, from, from a life.
00:19:12.760 And what's sad and interesting is that we've even instrumentalized hobbies. And it used to be,
00:19:18.280 you could have a hobby and people like, oh yeah, you build model trains. That's fine. But now it's
00:19:22.100 like, well, if you're going to build model trains, you've got to like have a social media account
00:19:25.900 where you're a model trained influencer. It has to be a side hustle. You can't just,
00:19:31.100 you can't just have model trains just because you enjoy it.
00:19:34.400 Right. Yeah. Side hustles. Side hustles are cool. Hobbies are uncool.
00:19:37.940 And I think there's a reason for that. And so, you know, one, one way around that,
00:19:42.080 which I certainly do in my life is to, is to do some, find something that you enjoy that
00:19:46.480 you're not very good at. I really enjoy hammering out various sort of piano rock songs on the
00:19:53.120 keyboard that I have here, but I tell you, I'm not good at it. I would not, uh, I would
00:19:58.280 not perform for love or money. And I certainly wouldn't get any money for performing. That's
00:20:03.380 a useful thing in a way because there's no pressure there. There's no attempt to think
00:20:08.120 that I might one day instrumentalize it. And obviously what I do professionally writing
00:20:13.480 is absolutely different from that. It's really hard to not think about writing with one eye
00:20:18.460 to, well, is this going to be a huge success? Is this book going to sell a lot of copies?
00:20:22.120 I'm like, you know, et cetera, et cetera. So good to have something that you, that you suck
00:20:25.900 at, but that you find enjoyment in.
00:20:28.140 There's a word for this type of activity. It's a Greek word you threw in the book. I can't
00:20:31.000 remember it. It starts with an A. There's like, there's telos activities.
00:20:34.960 Yeah. This atelic activity, it's Greek in a sense. It's really, it's essentially coined
00:20:40.020 by a contemporary philosopher, Kieran Satia. But what he means, as I understand it, is an
00:20:44.440 activity that is not defined by its telos, atelic. It's just something you do for itself
00:20:50.200 alone. Hiking is the other example I talk about at length in the book. If you want to
00:20:54.560 get more efficient at hiking where, you know, you drive the car somewhere and then you walk
00:20:59.220 in a loop or you walk to a point and turn around again, the most efficient way to do
00:21:02.900 a hike is just not to go. Then you're back at the starting point immediately. So doing
00:21:08.120 that for some future purpose, you know, that's not a perfect point because maybe you get more
00:21:13.600 physically fit through hiking or you update your social media account with great pictures
00:21:17.600 from your hikes. But basically, hiking is a thing, is an atelic activity par excellence
00:21:22.780 really, because, you know, you just do it. You're not leading up to something. There's not going
00:21:26.960 to come a time when you say, I have completed all the hiking I planned to do in my life.
00:21:31.800 It just is, it resists all of those, all of those kind of pressures.
00:21:36.340 Yeah. So that's a way to rebel against our instrumental culture. Just do something because
00:21:40.540 you enjoy and that will bring you happiness. And it's like the happiness is the side effect.
00:21:45.460 That's another thing people can get into like, well, I read this study. If you have a hobby,
00:21:49.180 it will make me happier. And by being happier, I'll be more productive and blah, blah, blah.
00:21:52.960 You can't go down there. Just like, no, just play piano, because you like to hammer out
00:21:57.860 piano rock tunes. That's it. That's it.
00:22:00.400 Right, right. And yeah, that's just instrumentalization again, right? Chasing happiness.
00:22:04.480 I mean, you know, we're made to do this. I don't think that people should feel bad about this sort
00:22:09.380 of natural tendency towards achieving future goals. I just think consciousness of what's going on can be
00:22:16.880 really helpful because then it makes you like, nobody wants to spend their whole life
00:22:20.880 only waiting for the moment on their deathbed where they get to say like, oh, that was enjoyable
00:22:27.640 in hindsight, right? Nobody wants that. So once you see that that's part of what you're doing,
00:22:32.560 I think it becomes pretty natural to ease up on that focus a bit.
00:22:36.800 We're going to take a quick break for your words from our sponsors.
00:22:38.780 And now back to the show. Yeah. And you quote Richard Rohr a lot. We've had him in the podcast
00:22:46.400 and he has that idea is that, you know, there's a first half of your life where you're kind of doing
00:22:50.100 the instrumental stuff. Like you're trying to build a career, you're trying to do those things,
00:22:53.240 but he said at a certain point, and this can happen at any time in your, in the lifespan,
00:22:57.520 you've got to like move beyond that and kind of just enjoy life for what it is. And he says,
00:23:02.840 it's a, it's a hard process. It's not, doesn't something you can't force. It just kind of happens.
00:23:07.120 Yeah. I mean, you get this, this sort of idea. I love Richard Rohr's work. I think he is influenced
00:23:13.420 by Jung, right? And it is, and that's a Jungian notion as well, that there's a sort of first half
00:23:18.700 and a second half of adult life and that certain ways of being, perhaps even certain forms of
00:23:24.800 productivity geekhood are maybe appropriate to young adulthood up to a point, but then they're
00:23:30.600 going to sort of stop being the answer if they ever are the answer. And at that point,
00:23:36.140 you sort of do need to come up with a different way of thinking one that isn't entirely targeted on,
00:23:44.280 on where you're going. I mean, something people have said about this book in a sort of semi-critical
00:23:49.040 way, which I'm, I'm receptive to is that it's a sort of a bit of a midlife book, you know, whether I,
00:23:56.480 I'm not sure I could have written it if I was in my twenties. I've tried very hard not to make it
00:24:02.000 only appropriate to people in midlife. And I, and I don't think it is, but I think, you know,
00:24:06.440 there are certain things you, you come to see just by being around long enough that certain methods and
00:24:14.220 things you thought might work, like eventually that you, it's like, Oh, I'm never going to get to
00:24:19.300 this summit that is implied in, in all these techniques that I'm, that I'm pursuing. And if
00:24:24.460 I'm not going to get to it, maybe it's time to think about a different approach.
00:24:27.860 So let's go back to this idea of where you discovered the more efficient you got at doing
00:24:33.180 stuff. You felt like you're just, you started doing more stuff. And what's interesting, you know,
00:24:38.260 half a century ago, there was economists, I think Maynard Keyes made this predictions like, Oh,
00:24:42.060 we'd only be working a few hours a week because we'd be so productive and efficient, but people are
00:24:47.180 still working 40 hours a week or more. So what's going on there? Like, why is it that we're getting
00:24:51.880 more done than ever? We're more productive than ever, but we just feel like we have to work more
00:24:58.780 to do more. Yeah. It's completely extraordinary, especially the way now that, you know,
00:25:04.360 being incredibly successful in some professional sector is likely to leave you more busy than if
00:25:10.100 you weren't extremely successful. And you look at sort of almost the whole of history, the whole point
00:25:15.200 of being wealthy was so you could, you know, go hunting and have banquets or something, you know,
00:25:18.840 so you didn't have to didn't have to work all the time. And now that's sort of turned on its on its
00:25:23.280 head. There are a huge number of different factors here, macroeconomic, social, cultural issues. But I
00:25:30.080 think a very simple part of what we're talking about here is just that if you focus on making any system
00:25:38.080 such as, you know, your own personal productivity, any system more efficient, in the absence of some
00:25:44.220 other guiding value, just like efficiency for its own sake, then all else being equal, you're going
00:25:49.820 to end up being busier and busier on less meaningful stuff, because you just sort of create capacity that
00:26:00.300 is then naturally filled by the pressures of the world, the pressures of capitalism, pressures of
00:26:04.600 other people. You know, if you get really, really good at processing your email, as I know from bitter
00:26:09.140 experience, you just get lots more email, because you reply to things and generate replies to those
00:26:14.240 replies, and etc, etc. You know, there's this phrase, this saying, if you want to get something
00:26:19.360 done, ask a busy person, the idea, if you're really good at processing your work, you're going to get
00:26:24.540 more work, or take on more work. If you're a sort of independent person who gets to independently
00:26:28.940 employed person who gets to choose, you're still going to choose to do more and more and more.
00:26:32.260 And, you know, it's exactly like when they widen freeways to try to ease congestion by they add
00:26:39.980 another lane to freeway, and then it makes the that route more appealing to drivers. So more drivers
00:26:46.480 are incentivized to use it, and the congestion returns to what it was before you get this, this
00:26:52.340 sort of seems to work in all sorts of domains of life, this idea that just sort of becoming more
00:26:57.920 productive will, will invite further inputs into the system. And the other thing I found was that,
00:27:04.360 you know, they're less meaningful inputs, because they don't have to clear this hurdle. Someone
00:27:08.560 says to you, can you do this? And you don't think to yourself, well, what am I going to neglect in
00:27:13.380 favor of this? You think, oh, just through becoming more efficient, I'll be able to do it all. And so you
00:27:17.960 gradually end up taking on more and more and more things that you probably shouldn't take on until the
00:27:22.080 system is full of junk.
00:27:24.000 And how do you avoid that? Is it just a matter of having, like, in this instance,
00:27:27.920 having a telos, like having, like, this is, here's what I'm about. And if this task doesn't
00:27:32.820 fulfill that, what I'm about, then that it's not coming on?
00:27:36.920 I think that's a big part of it. Obviously, to the extent that this is a social and cultural wide
00:27:42.480 problem, it probably has to be addressed at a policy level too. But yeah, I think on a personal
00:27:47.500 level, you can just see that, you know, you can bring yourself to see that, that you are not,
00:27:54.100 like, to understand that you're just not going to get everything done. Like, you are in a situation
00:27:59.700 where systematically, it's going to feel like there's more that really matters than you have
00:28:04.620 the capacity to do. That this is built into the system. It's not because you're insufficiently
00:28:10.360 self-disciplined, or you haven't found the right techniques yet, or something like that. And in that
00:28:14.880 situation, once you sort of internalize that understanding, it's actually quite liberating,
00:28:20.440 because you can just sort of give up in a way. It's a certain kind of surrender or defeat,
00:28:25.660 you know, where you see that something you were trying to do was just impossible. But it's a
00:28:31.360 defeat that is the prelude to then being able to act with a much clearer head and more undiluted
00:28:37.400 energy and attention on a handful of things that matter, because you're no longer attempting to do
00:28:44.560 an impossible amount of things. You've sort of seen why it is that that is an impossible quest.
00:28:51.360 It frees you up to focus on more things that do matter. And I think, you know, very simple
00:28:57.220 strategies here include this, you know, I spent a lot of my time as a productivity geek,
00:29:04.240 you know, trying to clear the decks, trying to get to this situation where I would have dealt with all
00:29:08.000 the little stuff. And I would have then these notional expanses of focus and time.
00:29:14.700 And it took me a long time to see that actually, like, you can't clear the decks, because clearing
00:29:18.600 the decks generates more work, and more things come into the onto the decks. And we live in a world
00:29:22.620 of infinite stuff to come onto your decks anyway. So at the most, you can spend a couple of hours at
00:29:29.520 the end of the day clearing the decks, sure, but you just at some point have to spend the first few
00:29:34.320 hours on the thing you care about the most, even though the decks aren't clear. And that is anxiety
00:29:40.340 inducing. It's uncomfortable, but I think it's the only way.
00:29:43.540 Yeah, I think in one of your emails, you had this idea, instead of thinking of your to do list as a
00:29:47.860 bucket that you can empty, you just got to think of it as a river. It's just constantly, stuff's
00:29:52.240 constantly going to be flowing by and you just have to decide, is this what I'm going to spend my
00:29:56.920 time on the day or not? And maybe yes, but probably maybe you shouldn't be spending time on that.
00:30:01.900 And the thing is, that was always true anyway, right? It's not like you're suddenly deciding
00:30:06.260 to let a bunch of people down. The point is, this is baked into the situation. There's all
00:30:11.700 sorts of things that would have value if you did them that you're never going to do. So this is
00:30:15.460 about being conscious of that situation so that you get to call the shots about which of the things
00:30:21.160 you do do. Otherwise, in the words of workplace consultant Jim Benson, who I quote in the book,
00:30:25.880 you just become a limitless reservoir for other people's demands and expectations. Because if
00:30:32.000 you're not making the decision about what to neglect in a situation where something must be neglected by
00:30:37.760 definition, then somebody else is going to make that decision and they're going to make it in their
00:30:42.040 interests.
00:30:43.240 And related to this idea of increased efficiency just encourages more stuff to be done, because
00:30:50.700 that's what the system is designed for do. It's just getting stuff done. So it's going to
00:30:54.240 continually want more stuff to do, is this idea of increased convenience makes us feel miserable,
00:31:01.360 which is counterintuitive. You think, well, if things are more convenient, if I can get stuff sent
00:31:05.480 to my door directly from Amazon in a day, that should make my life easier. But you make this case,
00:31:10.900 yeah, maybe, but also maybe not.
00:31:14.540 Right. I mean, convenience is such a great example of the perils of efficiency pursued for its own sake,
00:31:20.320 because, yeah, I mean, I think in some sense, all the efficiencies of modern technology absolutely
00:31:26.620 have made life easier. The question is whether easier is always what we want when trying to build
00:31:32.740 the most valuable life. So, you know, a very simple example of that is, yeah, if you can,
00:31:39.880 there's a natural tendency, if you can watch movies streaming at home and get food delivered to your
00:31:46.560 door without ever speaking to a human being and do all the rest of this stuff, like that's easier
00:31:51.000 than, than going out, meeting people or phoning a restaurant, talking to a human being. It's easier,
00:31:58.020 but it sort of all adds up to something being taken out of, of life, which are these kind of rough edges
00:32:04.820 and textures where you do have to speak to people. And as a result, you sort of, it's actually quite,
00:32:09.760 it's important for your wellbeing to have a few conversations with human beings in the course of
00:32:14.420 your day. I also give the example of, you know, I'm in the UK right now, but for a long time I've
00:32:19.640 lived in the US with lots of family in the UK, always leaving it too late to send them a birthday
00:32:25.740 card on time. So I would end up using these online services where you put the card together with a
00:32:29.960 photo and a message, and then it prints it and mails it locally at the other end. And like everyone
00:32:35.840 involved in that process knows that that's not quite the same, like that I've used convenience there and
00:32:40.460 something is gone from the, from the transaction. That if I had gone to the effort of planning with
00:32:48.200 enough force, enough forethought to have enough time, you know, buy a card, write in it, mail it,
00:32:53.160 that would mean more to the recipient because actually something is lost in making that process
00:32:59.600 really smooth and, and, and easy. So, you know, again and again, there are many examples of this,
00:33:04.200 you know, I think, yeah, it makes life smoother, but do you want a smooth life? I mean,
00:33:09.080 to some extent you do, but maybe not a perfectly smooth one.
00:33:11.880 Well, yeah, the Silicon Valley people who come with these apps that make life convenient,
00:33:16.000 they call that those pain points friction and their whole goal is to eliminate friction.
00:33:20.500 And what you're saying is no, actually friction can be good because it allows you to talk to the,
00:33:25.340 the clerk and you might have a conversation that you need that. And it's, I mean, yeah,
00:33:30.120 I don't think you're a smooth life would be boring. So why, why eliminate it? Like why eliminate
00:33:35.900 friction? Right. And you're just sort of, also, you're just sort of handing the decision about
00:33:40.200 what kind of experiences you want in your life to a, other people in Silicon Valley designing this
00:33:48.760 technology and be your sort of lowest impulses in a way, right? The impulse to not put in the effort
00:33:56.940 to do something. And as philosophers since, you know, ancient times have understood that
00:34:03.320 following your impulse all the time is it is its own kind of enslavement in a way it's its own kind
00:34:08.640 of losing loss of autonomy. So yeah, just like if you can consciously integrate a few of these
00:34:15.360 technologies into your life, I don't certainly don't think people should like actively pursue only
00:34:19.980 inconvenience at all points, but like that it's just like handing the decision-making to
00:34:26.820 forces that do not have your best interests at heart.
00:34:30.100 So we've been talking kind of about small ways that you can embrace finitude. So you're,
00:34:34.500 you don't feel so angst ridden, but then you also talk about some, like, there's like a metacognition
00:34:39.520 things you can do to help you think about time differently and your relation to time differently.
00:34:45.320 If you do it and you meditate on it, if you do these sort of like, what do we call them? Mind,
00:34:50.660 I don't know, mind games, we'll call them mind games. It can help you think about your time
00:34:53.960 differently. You can actually be really free and you can just totally shift the paradigm.
00:34:57.100 And one, there's two things I want to talk about. First is Heidegger's concept of time. And there's
00:35:02.220 a reason why I saved Heidegger for last because this guy, it's hard to understand this guy,
00:35:06.220 but I know you're not gonna be able to like exactly explain what Heidegger meant. And maybe we don't
00:35:11.280 even know what Heidegger meant. But like, what's Heidegger's concept of time? And like,
00:35:16.260 how can that or like your interpretation of what he thinks of time? And how can that change? Or
00:35:21.520 how does that change your relation to time? Yeah, Heidegger is not easy. And I'm just going
00:35:26.680 to issue as I always do the caveat that I don't claim that my interpretation is canonical or that
00:35:31.620 somebody else wouldn't want to offer a very different one. But my understanding of what Heidegger
00:35:38.740 is saying is really something that points again to this idea that we were discussing in the context
00:35:43.980 of medieval peasants, this idea that time need not be seen and is perhaps not best seen as this
00:35:51.700 thing that is separate from us. That in a sense, our time and the fact that our time is finite,
00:35:58.120 it's not just like one of the traits that defines a human being. It is the fundamental one.
00:36:03.300 Before we can ask any question about what we should do with our lives or how we should do it,
00:36:08.920 we already find ourselves in this finite stretch of time, being born forward on the river of time.
00:36:17.660 Perhaps we could say, as I think he sort of means too, that we just sort of are this stretch of time.
00:36:23.280 It's so fundamental that there isn't really a separation. We just are a short stretch of time
00:36:27.680 being born forward towards death. We don't know when it's coming. Every choice we make is a choice
00:36:32.980 to not do other things, a million other things with that moment, that hour, that week. And that
00:36:40.220 there is a kind of choice that you have to make between doing all sorts of things to try to deny
00:36:47.340 this feeling and not confront it and feel like you're not in this situation of being born forward
00:36:54.260 towards death in a stretch of finite time or facing up to it, facing up to the anxiety that
00:37:00.740 that inevitably brings, but sort of taking seriously the stakes of your time and each moment of your
00:37:08.900 time and what you do with your time. And so I think that that's just a very useful shift to get into a
00:37:16.400 little bit. I certainly don't claim that I've sort of done it perfectly, but I do think that there is
00:37:22.100 something central to this idea of just seeing our situation for what it is and seeing how much effort
00:37:28.680 we put into denying that our situation is what it is. And it's not about, I don't think it's about
00:37:34.780 spending your life in this sort of horrified awareness of death. I don't think it's really
00:37:39.100 about death in that sense. I think it's just about one major consequence of the fact that we die,
00:37:45.620 which is that our time is finite and just sort of letting the implications of that
00:37:51.860 course through your veins a bit to the point where you stop acting and making decisions as if
00:37:59.540 you had all the time in the world. Not necessarily doing, you know, trying really hard to do extraordinary
00:38:07.040 things with every minute of the day, but just living in a sort of more authentic relationship to
00:38:11.720 where you actually are. This section reminded me for some reason, I haven't thought about this movie
00:38:17.880 in years, but have you seen Tombstone? I haven't, I'm afraid. Okay. It's a great movie. It's the best
00:38:24.420 movie about Wyatt Earp. The Wyatt Earp movie with Kevin Costner is really boring. I think so.
00:38:29.540 This one, Tombstone, it's a lot of fun. It's got Val Kilmer, Kurt Russell, and there's this scene,
00:38:34.700 you know, Val Kilmer plays Doc Holliday. He's about to die. And he asked Wyatt Earp, it's like,
00:38:39.760 what did you ever want? And then Wyatt Earp says, just to live a normal life.
00:38:45.060 And Doc Holliday said, there's no normal life, Wyatt. It's just life. Get on with it.
00:38:51.120 Yeah. So I think we had some Heidegger in Tombstone.
00:38:55.960 Yeah. No, I think there's a, yeah, I can see the connection. I must watch that movie.
00:39:00.640 Yeah. Or you can at least watch the scene. You can look it up on YouTube. So the final thing
00:39:04.860 you do is you talk about, it's like a mind, a meditation you have to do, it's called cosmic
00:39:10.120 insignificance therapy. How can this help us feel better about our time management or have a more
00:39:18.400 humane approach towards time management? I mean, this is my slightly facetious label for the process
00:39:25.040 of really putting some effort into imagining, understanding how tiny and insignificant,
00:39:32.380 yes, you are considered, not you personally, you know, how insignificant we are considered
00:39:38.020 in the sort of expanse of the history and the future of the cosmos. I think there's something
00:39:46.460 just at the first glance, incredibly freeing about understanding that the way you get sort
00:39:53.600 of paralyzed by the seeming significance of choices you make, it can be very relaxing right
00:40:00.480 away. And I think motivating to understand that, you know, a thousand years from now, a hundred
00:40:05.940 years from now, almost nothing you decide is going to matter in any way that can actually
00:40:12.060 be an invitation to just sort of take some risks and live boldly and do some things that you wanted
00:40:18.560 to do without being so anxious about their impact. I also think that it's a really useful way to
00:40:27.060 consider and reconsider the definition of a meaningful life that you're sort of implicitly
00:40:32.160 carrying with you when you assess your own life and try to build a meaningful life. The obvious
00:40:37.540 criticism of this approach, I get it, right, is that it's just like, well, if everything's so
00:40:41.780 point, if we're all so insignificant, why do anything? It's all pointless. But I just don't
00:40:46.420 think that that follows. I write in the book about the work of a philosopher, Ido Landau,
00:40:50.820 who points out that the person who says, well, nothing I do is going to have counted for anything
00:40:56.240 in a thousand years' time, or probably won't have, so why do anything? They are invoking,
00:41:02.520 whether they recognize it or not, a definition of a meaningful life that is set, where the bar is set
00:41:08.780 so high that they would have to be superhuman to meet it. They would have to manage to, if not be
00:41:16.220 superhuman, then at least reach the level of the kind of person who occurs once in several hundred
00:41:22.540 years, a Shakespeare or a Tolstoy or a Michelangelo. And that we should question whether we really want
00:41:29.860 to be going around with this kind of definition of what makes it worth doing things and what is
00:41:35.920 meaningful. We should consider that there are all sorts of kind of ordinary seeming things that
00:41:43.020 could absolutely count as the content of a meaningful life that, you know, do you really
00:41:49.540 want to say that working for an organization that makes your small neighborhood a little more
00:41:56.580 beautiful or a little friendlier, that that was pointless because it didn't affect the whole planet
00:42:01.720 forever, or that caring for an elderly relative who needs that at that point in their lives is kind
00:42:08.820 of pointless because, you know, the, it doesn't, you didn't put a dent in the universe. I think that
00:42:14.900 most of us intuitively know that we don't want that kind of definition of what counts as a meaningful
00:42:20.100 life. And we do want to remember that ordinary things can be, can be meaningful or, you know,
00:42:26.060 on the level, I think about this book, like if it affects a few people positively in my generation,
00:42:30.820 that's great. It should not be the measure of a book that you write that, um, in, uh, you know,
00:42:37.460 hundreds and hundreds of years time, people are celebrating it. Like that's just why adopt a level
00:42:43.840 of a definition of meaning that, uh, sort of systematically puts almost everything that we
00:42:48.800 do as humans on the wrong side of it. Well, Kierkegaard talks about that. He has that quote,
00:42:53.560 it's like the ambitious man whose slogan is either Caesar or nothing. Right. And then like,
00:42:58.200 he doesn't become Caesar and he just becomes, he just, he's in despair. He's like, well,
00:43:01.580 nothing matters. And like Kierkegaard is like, that's dumb. Like don't do that. That's, that's
00:43:05.980 stupid. Right. And yeah, and this, this, and this chapter reminded me, uh, my great grandfather
00:43:11.500 in his memoir at the end of it, he wrote this like in the fifties or sixties, he put the, at the end
00:43:15.900 of his memoir, a poem called, there is no indispensable man. I'll link to it, but it's, it's the same
00:43:21.220 sort of thing. It's like, you know, you come into this world, you might make a big splash,
00:43:26.240 but when you leave it, you're not going to leave much behind, but that's, that's okay.
00:43:30.240 Like it's, for some reason I find it ennobling. It's like, yeah, I'm going to take risks. I'm
00:43:33.820 going to do just find meaning in my mundane everyday life. That's, that's, that's, that's,
00:43:39.200 that's okay. It's probably the best we can do. Right. And I really don't think it's a
00:43:43.420 council of despair, right? I don't think it means that you have to have a less meaningful life.
00:43:47.740 I don't think it means you can't do extraordinary things that, or, you know, things that will lead
00:43:53.660 to achieving fame and fortune. I think that's all great. I just think that when you're considering,
00:43:59.900 you know, the ways you're spending your life, that it shouldn't be the, the criterion should
00:44:06.280 not be something sort of, that is kind of superhuman in, in that regard. If, if you do
00:44:13.720 something that counts and it gets you a lot of fame and fortune, great. I'm not against that at all,
00:44:18.060 but don't use that as let alone these kind of even bigger kind of cosmic level kinds of
00:44:25.000 definitions of meaning. Don't use all that to, to define what counts as meaningful, follow something
00:44:29.840 more human. And then, you know, if it's successful, maybe, maybe fame and fortune will follow.
00:44:36.420 And the idea is you can apply this to your to-do list. Like don't think you have to like have on
00:44:39.940 your bucket list, right? A New York times bestselling novel. If that happens great, but you know,
00:44:46.140 write the book that you've been wanting to write for a long time, even if it's crappy. And even if
00:44:51.020 no one ever reads it, just write the book. Right. Yeah. I mean, if it matters, it matters.
00:44:57.260 It shouldn't need to matter on a level that is sort of something that's entirely beyond human
00:45:01.660 control or your control. Right. Exactly. Well, Oliver, this has been a great conversation.
00:45:05.560 I've had a lot of fun. Where can people go to learn more about the book and your work?
00:45:09.040 You can pick up the book anywhere you would expect to be able to pick up books. And then my
00:45:12.740 website is oliverberkman.com, where you can also subscribe to my email newsletter,
00:45:17.620 which I call The Imperfectionist. Fantastic. Well, Oliver Berkman,
00:45:20.320 thanks for your time. It's been a pleasure. Thank you. I've really enjoyed it.
00:45:23.660 So when I was talking to Oliver about cosmic insignificance therapy, I mentioned a poem
00:45:28.040 called There Is No Indispensable Man that my great-grandfather, William M. Hearst,
00:45:32.120 included at the very end of his memoirs that he published shortly before he died.
00:45:35.660 I also learned that General Dwight D. Eisenhower carried a copy of this poem in his pocket at all times.
00:45:39.760 I'm guessing it was his way of doing some cosmic insignificance therapy. So for your enjoyment
00:45:44.880 and meditation, here's the poem, There Is No Indispensable Man.
00:45:49.240 Sometime when you're feeling important, sometime when your ego's in bloom, sometime when you take
00:45:53.980 it for granted, you're the best qualified in the room. Sometime when you feel that you're going,
00:45:58.600 would leave an unfillable hole, just follow these simple instructions and see how they humble your
00:46:03.440 soul. Take a bucket and fill it with water. Put your hand in it up to the wrist. Pull it out and the
00:46:08.600 hole that's remaining is a measure of how much will be missed. You can splash all you wish when
00:46:13.180 you enter. You may stir up the water galore, but stop and you'll find that in no time, it looks quite
00:46:19.000 the same as before. The moral of this quaint example is to do just the best you can. Be proud of
00:46:24.600 yourself, but remember, there's no indispensable man. My yesterday was Oliver Berkman. He's the author
00:46:31.020 of the book, 4,000 Weeks. It's available on amazon.com and bookstores everywhere. You can find more
00:46:35.000 information about his work at his website, oliverberkman.com. Also check out our show
00:46:38.420 notes at awim.is slash 4,000 Weeks, where you can find links to resources. We can delve deeper into
00:46:42.580 this topic. Well, that wraps up another edition of the A1 Podcast. Make sure to check out our
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00:47:33.900 you
00:47:34.640 you