The Charlie Kirk Show - April 14, 2025


Ask Charlie Anything 219: Special Charlie-Erika Edition

Topics
submission in marriage hate college debt honeymoon fund affording blueberries finances financial burdens in marriage homeschooling
Hosted by
Charlie Kirk
Mentioned
Erica Kirk Daisy Cocomelon Gigi Turning Point USA Mormon Mingle Adam Sandler Katie Hill Mitt Romney Intentional Andrew Dallin Tucker Rachel Offer Manna Hank
God is Awakening an Entire People ft. Pastor Allen Jackson Defunding Harvard + NPR + PBS ft. Russ Vought

Episode Stats


Length

41 minutes

Words per minute

168.36

Word count

7,018

Sentence count

773

Harmful content

Misogyny

39

sentences flagged

Toxicity

5

sentences flagged

Hate speech

30

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode of The Charlie Kirk Show, host Charlie Kirk sits down with his wife, Erica Kirk, to talk about their marriage and what it's like being a conservative in the 21st century. Charlie and Erica talk about what it was like growing up in a conservative household and how they met, how they got married, and why they decided to have kids.

Transcript

Transcripts from "The Charlie Kirk Show" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.000 Hey everybody, an amazing conversation with my lovely, incredible wife, Erica Kirk from the Bitcoin.com studio.
00:00:07.000 Check out...
00:00:07.000 Her podcast as well.
00:00:09.000 It's amazing, which is the Midweek Rise Up.
00:00:12.000 Also go to biblein365.com.
00:00:14.000 That is biblein365.com.
00:00:17.000 If you want to read the entire Bible in a year, it's never too late to start.
00:00:20.000 Go to biblein365.com.
00:00:23.000 Email me as always, freedom at charliekirk.com.
00:00:26.000 Get involved with Turning Point USA at tpusa.com.
00:00:28.000 That is tpusa.com.
00:00:31.000 Buckle up, everybody.
00:00:32.000 Here we go.
00:00:33.000 Charlie, what you've done is incredible here.
00:00:35.000 Maybe Charlie Kirk is on the college campus.
00:00:37.000 I want you to know we are lucky to have Charlie Kirk.
00:00:40.000 Charlie Kirk's running the White House, folks.
00:00:43.000 I want to thank Charlie.
00:00:45.000 He's an incredible guy.
00:00:46.000 His spirit, his love of this country.
00:00:47.000 He's done an amazing job building one of the most powerful youth organizations ever created, Turning Point USA.
00:00:54.000 We will not embrace the ideas that have destroyed countries, destroyed lives, and we are going to fight for freedom on campuses across the country.
00:01:03.000 That's why we are here.
00:01:06.000 Noble Gold Investments is the official gold sponsor of The Charlie Kirk Show, a company that specializes in gold IRAs and physical delivery of precious metals.
00:01:16.000 Learn how you can protect your wealth with Noble Gold Investments at noblegoldinvestments.com.
00:01:23.000 That is noblegoldinvestments.com.
00:01:25.000 It's where I buy all of my gold.
00:01:27.000 Go to noblegoldinvestments.com.
00:01:31.000 Hello, everyone.
00:01:32.000 Very special hour episode for you today.
00:01:35.000 My wife joins us, Erica Kirk, the beautiful, legendary Erica.
00:01:39.000 I love you so much.
00:01:41.000 I love you.
00:01:41.000 You're my best friend.
00:01:42.000 Welcome to The Charlie Kirk Show.
00:01:43.000 Thanks, babe.
00:01:44.000 I'm stoked.
00:01:45.000 It's good to be back.
00:01:46.000 It's been a while.
00:01:46.000 We have asked the audience for questions.
00:01:49.000 Yes. They came up with some great ones.
00:01:51.000 There were some not-so-great ones, too, that Daisy had, too.
00:01:54.000 There were some X-rated ones, too, weren't there, Daisy?
00:01:56.000 Yeah, we...
00:01:57.000 Oh! Yeah, not good.
00:01:59.000 Not radio-appropriate.
00:02:01.000 Got it.
00:02:02.000 Not appropriate for anybody.
00:02:04.000 I don't know.
00:02:05.000 All right, so we are taking your questions and hopefully we'll be able to answer any thoughts that you have.
00:02:12.000 Great. Do you want to take the...
00:02:13.000 You choose the first one.
00:02:15.000 I'll pepper in the next one.
00:02:16.000 All right.
00:02:16.000 There's a few of them.
00:02:19.000 Well, this one's easy.
00:02:20.000 How long have you been married and when do you know it was time to get married?
00:02:23.000 We've been married since 2021.
00:02:26.000 Engaged 2020.
00:02:27.000 So it'll be four years.
00:02:28.000 Four years.
00:02:29.000 We laugh about this because our dates are so messed up because of babies.
00:02:33.000 Meaning, there's so many dates to remember.
00:02:37.000 I know.
00:02:37.000 I get all the anniversaries on May 8th.
00:02:39.000 Anniversaries, kids' birth dates.
00:02:42.000 May 14th, August 23rd.
00:02:45.000 So we've been married for four years.
00:02:47.000 How did you know it was time to get married?
00:02:50.000 Almost four years in May.
00:02:51.000 I proposed and she said yes.
00:02:53.000 How did we know?
00:02:54.000 We just, you just know.
00:02:56.000 It's also what, don't waste your time, right?
00:02:58.000 Don't waste your time.
00:02:59.000 And plus, we are ready to start our life together.
00:03:03.000 That's right.
00:03:04.000 That was an easy one.
00:03:05.000 That's easy.
00:03:06.000 You pick one.
00:03:08.000 Who is more conservative and why?
00:03:10.000 Erica. Yes.
00:03:13.000 By far.
00:03:14.000 Not even close.
00:03:15.000 I am a moderate compared to Erica.
00:03:18.000 Andrew always jokes that once you got married to me, you got more based.
00:03:22.000 That's true.
00:03:23.000 That is true.
00:03:24.000 No, Erica is very conservative. 1.00
00:03:26.000 I was raised well.
00:03:29.000 Yes, you have a great mom.
00:03:31.000 Great mom.
00:03:32.000 Great parents.
00:03:32.000 My grandparents were amazing.
00:03:35.000 Fiercely right-wing.
00:03:36.000 Yes. My grandfather was an immigrant from Sweden and fought in World War II and the Korean War.
00:03:46.000 Yeah, and he got the Silver Star, the Bronze Star, and knighted by the King of Sweden, and he was always super far right.
00:03:53.000 Do you think having kids made you more conservative?
00:03:56.000 100%. Which I didn't think was possible.
00:04:00.000 But 100%, absolutely.
00:04:03.000 And a better wife. 0.98
00:04:05.000 And a better wife. 0.98
00:04:06.000 Do you think that a lot of the fact that young women are liberals because they don't have kids usually, typically?
00:04:13.000 Young women are liberals because they don't have kids? 1.00
00:04:16.000 I'm asking, yeah.
00:04:18.000 No, I wouldn't say that because I have some friends who are still not married and don't have kids and they're conservative and they're finding it hard to find a mate.
00:04:28.000 But if you're saying, traditionally speaking, the women who don't have kids are more left-leaning because they choose not to have kids, that's a whole different topic.
00:04:39.000 A whole different topic.
00:04:40.000 They consider kids to being a burden.
00:04:43.000 A burden, a nuisance.
00:04:45.000 But no, it's me.
00:04:46.000 But also, too, you have to understand, and that also goes back to how did you know it was time to get married, understanding your biblical role as a wife and a mother and knowing that you're ready to step into that motherhood, that being a wife and that type of era of your life,
00:05:05.000 if you will.
00:05:06.000 Here's a good one.
00:05:08.000 What traits should conservative women be looking for in men and vice versa? 1.00
00:05:13.000 Ooh. I know one of the questions deals with...
00:05:18.000 I was going to go off one of the questions that talked about the apps, but I think women for looking for their future spouse needs to hone in on the fact, is he going to lead you?
00:05:33.000 To me,
00:06:00.000 it's because...
00:06:03.000 The guy didn't have to hunt for them.
00:06:05.000 Not saying they have to hunt for a woman, but they do have to seek out a wife. 0.60
00:06:08.000 And since they didn't have to, they made it so easy on an app to just press a button.
00:06:14.000 It's just a number in their head.
00:06:17.000 Like, you want to be so much more than...
00:06:19.000 I'm not saying apps are bad.
00:06:20.000 I mean, they're not the greatest thing.
00:06:22.000 I've had friends who did find their significant other on an app, but the likelihood...
00:06:26.000 It's like the lottery.
00:06:27.000 The likelihood of you finding your future husband or wife on an app is...
00:06:32.000 A lot less likely to happen.
00:06:34.000 So, that to say, I'm so blessed.
00:06:40.000 It's so hard because I literally won the jackpot with my husband.
00:06:45.000 Vice versa.
00:06:46.000 That's really hard.
00:06:48.000 I will say women should look for men that have self-control.
00:06:53.000 And men should look for women that are willing to submit. 0.90
00:06:56.000 Which is basically a non-feminist woman. 1.00
00:06:59.000 Right. But the whole topic of submission becomes, that word really lights people on fire.
00:07:05.000 It's biblical.
00:07:07.000 I know.
00:07:07.000 It's beautiful.
00:07:09.000 Marriage in the right context is so beautiful because your husband will give up anything and everything for you in a healthy manner, but they will literally love you and honor you and cherish you above all and put...
00:07:25.000 All the noise aside and focus on wife, children, family.
00:07:30.000 Daisy says there were quite a number of questions on submission, so dive more into that.
00:07:35.000 Okay. For me as a wife, my biblical role is to be the helpmate to my husband.
00:07:45.000 That does not mean I'm less than you.
00:07:48.000 That does not mean that I am above you.
00:07:51.000 Thank goodness.
00:07:51.000 I love that you lead our home.
00:07:54.000 I love that you are such a—you are so intentional with your faith, and you are so intentional with just how you are as a father and a husband, but as a wife, I am to quote-unquote submit to you,
00:08:10.000 which is a beautiful word, by the way, because that's the order of how it's supposed to go, and God will bless that.
00:08:19.000 I am not to— Try and rival you.
00:08:23.000 We're on the same team.
00:08:25.000 We complement each other.
00:08:27.000 The body, an eye is supposed to be an eye to see.
00:08:32.000 You can't expect an ear to see.
00:08:34.000 There are certain things within the body that operate how it's supposed to be, similar to marriage.
00:08:39.000 I am the wife.
00:08:40.000 I am in charge of certain things.
00:08:42.000 Guardian of the home.
00:08:43.000 Helping with the children.
00:08:44.000 That is so I can make it easy for my husband to do what he needs to do.
00:08:49.000 There's a balance there.
00:08:50.000 And then you get into the people who are saying, well, my husband's abusive.
00:08:53.000 That's not what we're talking about.
00:08:55.000 We're talking about the beautiful, beautiful, sacred marriage of when you are at the altar, you become one with your spouse.
00:09:03.000 And the problem is that I feel as if some women, after they have children, They lose that fire that they got at the altar, that fiery spirit of this is the man I've been praying for and they get burned out because of the kids or because of circumstances and then it's like...
00:09:23.000 Submitting to my husband, that sounds exhausting.
00:09:25.000 It's supposed to be liberating.
00:09:26.000 It's supposed to be freeing.
00:09:28.000 You are in charge of what you're in charge of.
00:09:30.000 Your husband's in charge of what he's in charge of.
00:09:31.000 And it's supposed to be a beautiful marriage of a teamwork and symbolic within biblical marriage and symbolic within how God and Jesus and everything, just your whole faith is supposed to operate.
00:09:47.000 So submission's a beautiful thing.
00:09:51.000 Christ submitted, submit to your husbands as, I have to look at the exact verse.
00:09:57.000 Well, husbands, yeah.
00:09:59.000 Oh, yeah, husbands submit to Christ.
00:10:01.000 Asians 5. Yeah. 0.99
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00:11:26.000 I mean, I've never found, obviously, any problem with it, but do you think that most women struggle with it?
00:11:32.000 Here it is, yeah.
00:11:33.000 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
00:11:35.000 This submits that both husband and wives are called to serve and prioritize each other's needs.
00:11:39.000 Do you think that most women struggle with it because of a kind of feminist mentality that has seeped in? 1.00
00:11:48.000 Yeah, because I feel as if Christianity in itself has become semi...
00:11:55.000 Feminized? From the standpoint of, I know we've talked about this before, you know, the Pinterest Christianity with the little flowers all over the beautiful scripted font and like making the Bible feminine. 0.81
00:12:10.000 And it's not.
00:12:12.000 It's a beautiful, beautiful, not even a story.
00:12:19.000 I mean, it is a story, but it's a beautiful.
00:12:25.000 It's all about Jesus.
00:12:29.000 It's all about God.
00:12:30.000 It always leads you back to God and always leads you back to how you're supposed to live your life biblically.
00:12:35.000 But yeah, women, I think, are offended by that because they feel as if it makes them lesser. 1.00
00:12:44.000 Than they are, which it makes them feel like they don't have the choice or the voice that they need to have in order to be quote-unquote liberated.
00:12:50.000 But that's the exact opposite.
00:12:52.000 When you're in a biblical marriage, you are supported and you're loved and your viewpoint is just as important.
00:13:00.000 But you have to let your husband lead.
00:13:03.000 Do you hear a lot of struggle with that topic of submission from women you talk to?
00:13:10.000 Yes and no.
00:13:11.000 Yes, from the women who are not strong Christians, who are just more in the world trying to figure out and navigate their marriage based on that standpoint.
00:13:24.000 But I think it goes back to what you were saying.
00:13:27.000 The men need to be prepared to take on that role.
00:13:30.000 That's not a light role to carry, being the leader of the home.
00:13:39.000 Who aren't prepared for that season of life.
00:13:42.000 They leave the metaphorical pants on the ground.
00:13:45.000 And so the women come in and put those pants on because they feel like, I have to be this role. 1.00
00:13:51.000 I have to play this role.
00:13:52.000 And I need to be the provider.
00:13:55.000 Or I need to...
00:13:56.000 And also, too, I think mom guilt falls into it, too.
00:13:59.000 Of, like, I'm not providing for my family.
00:14:01.000 If they worked in the workforce prior and now they're a stay-at-home mom, which is a huge blessing.
00:14:06.000 To have that opportunity to raise your babies like that.
00:14:09.000 I think that they feel as if they're comparing their season to other people's.
00:14:13.000 And so that's where I think, you know, you get the moms and wives that are not wanting to submit. 0.71
00:14:21.000 But I think the husband needs to always be in a position of understanding his biblical role as well for that to all.
00:14:27.000 You know, mesh together.
00:14:29.000 And even if the husband understands it and reminds his wife or the wife reminds the husband, like, let's pray together.
00:14:35.000 Let's recenter our relationship and marriage to make it healthy and Christ-centered.
00:14:40.000 It's important.
00:14:40.000 You pick one.
00:14:42.000 Okay. I could also talk about more of what women should be looking for, or men should be looking for in women.
00:14:48.000 Mm-hmm.
00:14:49.000 You can.
00:14:49.000 We kind of talked about that, though.
00:14:51.000 I know.
00:14:52.000 What traits are conservative?
00:14:56.000 This is one that someone just emailed us in, freedomatcharliekirk.com.
00:15:00.000 Oh, really?
00:15:00.000 Erica, do you ever get hate from Charlie's work?
00:15:03.000 How do you handle it?
00:15:04.000 Charlie, do you ever feel guilt or do you ever deal with guilt when Erica gets hate?
00:15:10.000 No, I don't.
00:15:14.000 Honestly, this is how I know God made us for each other, because anytime I do get quote-unquote hate, it's the same stuff you get.
00:15:24.000 It's not even worth saying it or repeating the things that were called or the names that were called.
00:15:31.000 But yes, I do.
00:15:33.000 I've lost family members.
00:15:34.000 I've lost friends.
00:15:35.000 But I actually am kind of grateful that that's happened because God has pruned my life in a way where I am surrounded in a circle now by people who love us, support us, pray with us, encourage us.
00:15:45.000 A small, mighty circle.
00:15:46.000 And that's what I would much rather have, a small, mighty circle than a massive one.
00:15:49.000 It's the people that you can trust and pour into.
00:15:52.000 And yes, do I get hate?
00:15:55.000 Bring it on.
00:15:56.000 Exactly. I'll have a...
00:15:59.000 I have a velvet steel spine by the end of my life, so bring it on.
00:16:04.000 I have nothing to fear.
00:16:06.000 Yeah, I mean, look, we get a lot of hate.
00:16:08.000 We get a lot of death threats, but it's just part of life.
00:16:10.000 It is.
00:16:10.000 And it makes you stronger.
00:16:11.000 Right. And honestly, if you are out there and you aren't getting a lot of hate, then...
00:16:15.000 What are you doing?
00:16:16.000 Well, yeah, Satan's not...
00:16:17.000 You're not doing anything that bothers Satan.
00:16:18.000 No, exactly.
00:16:18.000 You're just being boring.
00:16:19.000 You're probably honestly doing the bidding of the enemy.
00:16:23.000 Right. No, it's true.
00:16:25.000 Okay, let's see.
00:16:26.000 Emails freedom at charliekirk.com.
00:16:28.000 Lots of questions coming in from you guys.
00:16:30.000 You want to do the dating app thing?
00:16:32.000 Yeah, I mean, I kind of touched on it.
00:16:33.000 Yes and no.
00:16:34.000 I used to have stronger ones, but I don't think as many people are on them anymore.
00:16:38.000 Do you think there's a difference than, like, dating apps and, like, dating services?
00:16:40.000 Are those two different?
00:16:41.000 I hear dating services are awful.
00:16:44.000 I hear that the ones that are out there...
00:16:45.000 Prager is very pro, like, dating apps and services.
00:16:48.000 He always was.
00:16:49.000 I mean...
00:16:49.000 His thought is more options, the better.
00:16:51.000 Yeah, but how lazy does that make the man to be able to be?
00:16:55.000 They're presented a binder of women, and they're like... 1.00
00:16:58.000 Like a Mitt Romney binder for a woman. 1.00
00:17:01.000 Do you want a brunette? 1.00
00:17:02.000 Okay, let's go down this manila folder.
00:17:05.000 Women are becoming notoriously pickier than men, though. 0.88
00:17:09.000 Right. It's a big problem.
00:17:10.000 They have a CVS receipt length checklist of what they want.
00:17:15.000 There is a growing theme that women are actually grading. 1.00
00:17:20.000 They say they're unhappier with the dating pool right now than men.
00:17:24.000 I could see that.
00:17:25.000 And part of it, by the way, is incredibly superficial.
00:17:28.000 But are men unhappy with the dating pool of women?
00:17:30.000 No, not as unhappy as women. 1.00
00:17:33.000 I think women... 1.00
00:17:34.000 You know what's interesting?
00:17:35.000 Some of it's superficial.
00:17:35.000 They say that men aren't attractive.
00:17:37.000 I know, but I'm thinking about all of the way...
00:17:40.000 How we grew up of how romanticized they made finding your...
00:17:47.000 Your future spouse, like, you're going to be so in love.
00:17:49.000 You're going to be swept up and these flowers are going to be flying around you and you're going to be so, like, butterflies in your stomach.
00:17:57.000 And so I feel as if when people don't feel that immediately, they're like, oh, this person's not the right one.
00:18:02.000 Or they're just, I don't know, I think they're caught up in what they're supposed to, that just, I mean, it's important.
00:18:09.000 Is there like a Christian Tinder? 0.95
00:18:11.000 Does that exist?
00:18:11.000 I don't know.
00:18:12.000 You have an ad for it.
00:18:14.000 It's like a matchmaking service, I think.
00:18:17.000 I don't know if there's a Christian Tinder, but matchmaking services I heard are not the best.
00:18:23.000 No good?
00:18:23.000 Yeah. Oh, it's called Christian Mingle?
00:18:25.000 I don't think they're a sponsor of our thing, right?
00:18:27.000 No, not them.
00:18:28.000 Isn't there like Farmers Connect, too?
00:18:30.000 For farmers?
00:18:31.000 Yeah, no, I think there's like Mormon Mingle, too. 0.97
00:18:34.000 There's Mormon Mingle? 0.97
00:18:35.000 Yeah, yeah, there's definitely.
00:18:37.000 Yeah, Dallin probably knows all about it.
00:18:41.000 Not anymore.
00:18:42.000 Yeah, I was going to say not.
00:18:43.000 He's taken.
00:18:44.000 Terrell and the gang probably know all about it.
00:18:47.000 Mormon Mingle? 0.75
00:18:48.000 I think there's Mormon Mingle. 0.99
00:18:49.000 Yeah, it's FarmersOnly.com.
00:18:52.000 That's a thing.
00:18:54.000 So how do they check to make sure, I guess, you have to submit that you have a farm?
00:18:58.000 You have to show a video of yourself throwing hay around.
00:19:01.000 Are you serious?
00:19:02.000 I don't know.
00:19:02.000 It says, single in the country, question mark.
00:19:05.000 There's no way this is ever abused.
00:19:08.000 I wonder if a woman is like, you know what, I want that farm life, and so she gets some chickens in the backyard, and then... 1.00
00:19:16.000 Shows herself cultivating her many...
00:19:21.000 No, I think there definitely is Mormon mingle. 0.97
00:19:24.000 There's something of that variety.
00:19:29.000 Okay, but apps for a seating service.
00:19:31.000 I just...
00:19:32.000 You know what?
00:19:33.000 Ask your local pastor.
00:19:35.000 I'm... What you prioritize is what you get.
00:19:38.000 Right. I'm looking for my future spouse.
00:19:40.000 If you prioritize trying to find a spouse, you're much higher likelihood...
00:19:44.000 To find one.
00:19:44.000 But as women, you need to take care of yourself in order to...
00:19:47.000 You can't be looking like Adam Sandler and expect that you're going to...
00:19:52.000 And men, just figure out ways to make more money. 1.00
00:19:54.000 I don't want to say it's not that hard, but if you work hard and apply yourself and obsess, you can make more money and you will be more attractive to them.
00:20:00.000 But like you say, stop spending money on alcohol.
00:20:03.000 Stop playing video games.
00:20:05.000 Invest in yourself.
00:20:06.000 Learn more.
00:20:06.000 Be scrappier.
00:20:10.000 I don't want to say it's easy because it's not necessarily easy.
00:20:13.000 Right. But it's easy to not be poor if you are a man.
00:20:19.000 You have to make a decision, a conscious choice to not have a poverty mindset.
00:20:26.000 But what about school debt?
00:20:28.000 They shouldn't have gone to college.
00:20:30.000 Because college is a scam.
00:20:32.000 Yeah, I mean, look, I just...
00:20:33.000 Men will find a greater pool of women if they increase their income. 0.98
00:20:39.000 Right. We're
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00:21:37.000 The world is turning to gold.
00:21:38.000 Shouldn't you be looking into doing that too?
00:21:42.000 What's your favorite memory pre-kids, post-kids?
00:21:46.000 Going to Israel, definitely.
00:21:48.000 That was amazing.
00:21:49.000 I loved that.
00:21:51.000 Being able to walk, yeah, because, you know, before I met you, when I went previously was with my mom on a pilgrimage, and the whole time I was there, I was praying for my future husband.
00:22:03.000 Didn't know it was you, and we were both in Israel at the same time, but any time I could find a place to put a little piece of paper of a prayer in a hole in a wall, that was me, and that was me praying for you, and then I got to go back with you was surreal.
00:22:20.000 How about post-kids?
00:22:22.000 I'd say Maine was pretty great.
00:22:23.000 Jackson Hole was great.
00:22:25.000 That one's tough, post-kids, because every milestone with the kids is so special.
00:22:33.000 Birthdays. Seeing Gigi at dance class.
00:22:37.000 Just little things like that.
00:22:38.000 She did the Trump dance, by the way.
00:22:40.000 I don't even know if I told you that in dance class yesterday.
00:22:44.000 We have lots of questions.
00:22:46.000 Email us, freedom at charliekirk.com.
00:22:48.000 How would you tell young married couples who are going to start having families to prepare slash ready their marriage for the changes that come with them?
00:22:56.000 That's a great question.
00:22:57.000 Okay, first and foremost, always remember to put your spouse first.
00:23:01.000 Get premarital counseling.
00:23:03.000 Premarital counseling.
00:23:04.000 Put your spouse first. 0.80
00:23:05.000 Save money.
00:23:06.000 Save money.
00:23:08.000 Oh, instead of investing in a bunch of clothes that they'll grow out of really quickly.
00:23:15.000 They should have a...
00:23:17.000 You know how people do honeymoon funds?
00:23:19.000 These are young married couples.
00:23:20.000 Got it.
00:23:21.000 Not single ones.
00:23:21.000 Yeah. Okay.
00:23:23.000 No, that's good.
00:23:25.000 Yeah. So instead of doing...
00:23:27.000 You know how they do the honeymoon fund?
00:23:29.000 They should do a fund where it's overnight help if they don't have a family member to help them.
00:23:33.000 I totally agree.
00:23:35.000 I think that wedding directories, there's so much money wasted.
00:23:38.000 Like, oh, I want a blender.
00:23:40.000 I want a knife.
00:23:41.000 Right. And my experience, most people don't even use all that stuff.
00:23:45.000 No. It should just be, give us money.
00:23:47.000 Just give us money and it will be honeymoon fund or save money fund.
00:23:54.000 We did a honeymoon fund and it was great.
00:23:55.000 Yeah. It was special.
00:23:57.000 It was totally special.
00:23:58.000 Because those memories are way more important than...
00:24:01.000 So how would you tell young married couples who are going to start having families to prepare, ready their marriage?
00:24:09.000 For the changes that come with it.
00:24:10.000 Yeah, look, the man has to, I mean, I'll be very honest, the man has to start earning enough money where the wife or the mom does not have to work. 0.52
00:24:18.000 And if the man isn't capable of doing that, well, then figure it out.
00:24:21.000 Become a man.
00:24:22.000 Right. A more tangible side for a female perspective, make sure that you don't get so hyper-fixated on the birth process. 1.00
00:24:35.000 Once you're about to have a child, don't be so fixated and obsessed with, I am going to have a child on my couch, in my living room, free birth, no drugs, and then leave no room for God's will if that totally does not happen.
00:24:51.000 Because I know we had a birth plan and the only thing that went to plan on that birth plan was that we had a child.
00:24:57.000 That's right.
00:24:58.000 Everything else went out the window.
00:25:00.000 We had a great OB.
00:25:01.000 May he rest in peace.
00:25:01.000 Terrible story.
00:25:02.000 So sad.
00:25:03.000 So young married couples, look, keep your faith obviously first and try to identify any... 0.98
00:25:13.000 fleshly problems that you might be having.
00:25:17.000 So if the wife might have a gossip problem or a spending money problem, or the husband might have an alcohol problem or a pornography problem or a drug problem,
00:25:28.000 Don't welcome kids into the world. 0.97
00:25:32.000 I shouldn't say you should always welcome kids into the world, but try to get those things settled before you entered kids into the world.
00:25:37.000 I think before we go to that next question, I think it's because you mentioned gossip.
00:25:43.000 I think it's really important that women do not gossip to their friends about their husband.
00:25:53.000 Because, first of all, friends can be very unforgiving when it comes to certain things with husband.
00:25:59.000 But what you talk about with your spouse behind closed doors needs to stay there.
00:26:05.000 It goes through one ear.
00:26:07.000 And literally ends at the other ear.
00:26:09.000 And you do not share it.
00:26:11.000 You do not repeat it.
00:26:12.000 You have to continually invest in the confidence in one another that you're on the same team.
00:26:18.000 You support each other.
00:26:19.000 You love each other.
00:26:19.000 You're not going to undercut each other.
00:26:21.000 You are not going to sabotage one another unknowingly because you're trying to impress a friend that you have a husband that does XYZ. 0.54
00:26:31.000 And wives do not compare your husband to... 1.00
00:26:36.000 Other women's husbands. 0.60
00:26:39.000 Like, Hank does XYZ so well with a hammer.
00:26:43.000 Well, my husband doesn't do that.
00:26:46.000 Like, what your husband's good at, someone else's husband might not be good at.
00:26:50.000 So just, like, love your husband.
00:26:53.000 Love him so much and understand and hold in your heart that God has put you guys together for a reason to have.
00:27:03.000 A beautiful family, and children are a blessing from the Lord, and don't forget your husband in the process, and don't forget your husband in the chaos of having kids.
00:27:13.000 Now we can go to the next question.
00:27:14.000 No, I totally agree.
00:27:15.000 What is the next?
00:27:16.000 Daisy, I think, sent it.
00:27:17.000 What should be the order when it comes to God, kids, and marriage, and why?
00:27:23.000 Well, it's God first, then marriage, then kids.
00:27:28.000 It is.
00:27:29.000 You get to choose the next one.
00:27:31.000 These are great questions.
00:27:33.000 The study shows that married women with kids are the happiest. 0.71
00:27:36.000 Why do you think that is?
00:27:37.000 I mean, it's just nature.
00:27:38.000 I mean, just becoming a CEO of a shoe company is not going to give you happiness.
00:27:42.000 Women have it so mixed up. 1.00
00:27:44.000 You can have a career after children, but if you try to have a career while you have your kids...
00:27:54.000 There is no such thing as balance.
00:27:56.000 That is such a myth.
00:27:59.000 Gigi gets those little Montessori toys every month, and there's this one that has the buckets that balance. 1.00
00:28:05.000 If I put something in one of those buckets, it's going to drop down.
00:28:08.000 And if I try to balance them, both buckets are filled, which is not realistic.
00:28:13.000 I can't spend...
00:28:17.000 Half of the day doing one thing, I missed out half of that time with being with the kids.
00:28:22.000 So you have to choose where your heart has to be fully with the home.
00:28:28.000 You have to make that decision on your own, but you can always, after your kids are in school or after they're in high school, you can always go back to work.
00:28:37.000 You can always find a way to get back into the workforce, but if you miss those precious first few years, That is so hard to make up because memories are so much more important than an added paycheck.
00:28:53.000 It's how God has wired us and it's our nature, which is to have children, not just have a bigger bank account.
00:29:00.000 Next question.
00:29:01.000 What means the most to Charlie coming home from the battlefield?
00:29:06.000 What means most to Erica when Charlie is at home?
00:29:09.000 I'm not quite sure I understand the question.
00:29:11.000 I understand the question.
00:29:12.000 Charlie will text me and say, keep things boring.
00:29:14.000 Yes. Because for the past several days, things were not boring.
00:29:18.000 Hospital visit.
00:29:19.000 So anyways, yeah, keep things boring so that he can be on the battlefield and not be mortified when he comes home.
00:29:27.000 I love coming home.
00:29:28.000 It's the best thing.
00:29:29.000 But I have to go out and fight.
00:29:32.000 I know.
00:29:32.000 It's so cute.
00:29:33.000 Gigi loves blueberries.
00:29:35.000 And so every time he leaves, she's so sad.
00:29:39.000 And he's like, honey.
00:29:41.000 Baby, I gotta go because I have to afford your blueberry budget.
00:29:44.000 She gets it.
00:29:45.000 She totally gets it.
00:29:47.000 She understands it.
00:29:49.000 Because then when we're FaceTiming Daddy, she'll look at Daddy and be like, Dada working.
00:29:52.000 I'm like, he is.
00:29:53.000 And she's like, to afford blueberries. 1.00
00:29:57.000 Yes. So she's connecting that blueberries just don't come from the heavens.
00:30:03.000 Manna from heaven.
00:30:03.000 Right, they don't fall into the kitchen.
00:30:05.000 They don't just come ex nihilo.
00:30:06.000 No, they sure don't.
00:30:10.000 Not at all.
00:30:13.000 Hey everybody, Charlie Kirk here.
00:30:15.000 Brand new year, brand new opportunities to change the world for the better.
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00:31:06.000 That is charliekirk.com and click on the pre-born banner.
00:31:09.000 I'm a donor.
00:31:10.000 You should be too.
00:31:11.000 charliekirk.com, pre-born banner.
00:31:15.000 This is a good one.
00:31:16.000 How much did you guys discuss religion, finances, politics, how to raise children before getting engaged?
00:31:22.000 If I could just chime in on one of them.
00:31:24.000 Men, you should be completely in charge of finances.
00:31:26.000 I totally agree.
00:31:27.000 And your wife should have nothing to do with it. 1.00
00:31:29.000 I mean, they can have input.
00:31:32.000 But you should release that burden from your wife and just take care of all the money.
00:31:36.000 I have to say, having to provide for my, just as myself as a woman, having to provide for yourself, especially because when I was living in New York City, it all fell on me.
00:31:47.000 It's exhausting.
00:31:49.000 I love the fact that I can relinquish that role to my husband because he's so good at it, but relinquish it to him and say, I trust you so much.
00:32:00.000 I know you're going to help provide for our family.
00:32:01.000 That is one less thing I have to not deal with.
00:32:05.000 I've watched my mom have to deal with that while she had her own business and she was my mom and dad in one package because my parents got divorced when I was really young.
00:32:14.000 But to be able to relinquish that to you is so liberating.
00:32:19.000 And I can focus on other things that are way more important because that's your domain and I don't have to worry about it.
00:32:25.000 And if you are marrying a man that is not capable of completely and totally handing the finances, then you should not marry that man.
00:32:34.000 Finances will break a marriage quicker than anything else, period.
00:32:38.000 But what if he checks all of the boxes?
00:32:41.000 He just is horrible at money.
00:32:42.000 And you're really good at money.
00:32:44.000 Doesn't matter.
00:32:45.000 Okay. Doesn't matter.
00:32:46.000 I mean, then all of a sudden you're talking about a reverse.
00:32:49.000 I think then you're talking about very confused gender rules.
00:32:52.000 Then are you going to be a stay-at-home dad?
00:32:55.000 Is that basically what that is?
00:32:56.000 Okay, but then what about the women that are the ones that write the checks and do the bills? 1.00
00:33:02.000 Good luck.
00:33:03.000 Yeah. I mean, it can work.
00:33:04.000 I'm sure it has.
00:33:05.000 But I see those marriages careening for divorce quicker than anything else.
00:33:10.000 Here's why.
00:33:11.000 We as men are hardwired to produce for the family.
00:33:14.000 We find meaning.
00:33:15.000 We find purpose.
00:33:17.000 Tucker would talk about this all the time.
00:33:19.000 He would like, I'd have the worst day ever, but I'd know that today I'm paying for tuition.
00:33:24.000 Like today, my kids' tuition are being paid for.
00:33:27.000 And for men, we find great purpose in being able to come back home and being like, we provided for all of this.
00:33:34.000 Like this is my nest egg.
00:33:37.000 Yeah, and Daisy just said she has a... 1.00
00:33:39.000 Stay-at-home friend who just went on a date and said the guy on the first date, he wants to be a stay-at-home dad in the future. 0.98
00:33:45.000 Yeah, he's probably gay. 0.98
00:33:47.000 Daisy agrees. 0.99
00:33:48.000 She said, I think he might be gay. 0.94
00:33:49.000 Yeah, I totally agree.
00:33:50.000 He just went on a date.
00:33:51.000 Why would the guy say he wants to be a stay-at-home dad?
00:33:53.000 I mean, but can I just say...
00:33:55.000 It sounds like torture.
00:33:56.000 Hold on.
00:33:57.000 I do not want to knock the stay-at-home dads. 0.61
00:34:00.000 I do not.
00:34:01.000 There are some who temporarily have to switch that role.
00:34:06.000 That happened to my parents a long time ago.
00:34:09.000 Granted, again, they got a divorce, so that probably falls into your bucket.
00:34:13.000 I am an anthropologist.
00:34:16.000 But my dad was a stay-at-home dad for a few years, and I gotta say, it was really sweet and really special.
00:34:22.000 I was four, but...
00:34:25.000 Of course it's not an indictment of the morality.
00:34:28.000 No, but if you're saying from the get-go, I want to be a stay-at-home dad.
00:34:32.000 It's an imbalance of nature.
00:34:35.000 And some people are able to juggle imbalances of nature, but...
00:34:42.000 Your husband has to be the one that goes out into the world and builds and battles and comes home.
00:34:47.000 Conquers. Conquers, comes home and is like, this is my nest egg.
00:34:50.000 This is what I worked so hard for.
00:34:52.000 And the wife is like, welcome home, babe. 1.00
00:34:55.000 Whatever you need, we're here.
00:34:56.000 Financial burdens should not be brought into the concern of the wife.
00:35:01.000 It just, I just, it should be.
00:35:03.000 Well, then it bleeds into the kids and the kids are like, oh, I can't afford to do this.
00:35:07.000 Why am I being so firm on this?
00:35:09.000 Because I know.
00:35:11.000 The number one reason why people cheat on their wives and why divorce happens is financial.
00:35:16.000 It is number one.
00:35:17.000 It is the number one thing.
00:35:19.000 It collapses and breaks apart marriages more than anything else.
00:35:23.000 And so if you have a husband that leads in it, and it's not that, again, it comes easy to me, but guys, don't borrow money.
00:35:33.000 You just start with that principle.
00:35:35.000 You're not going to have any credit card debt.
00:35:37.000 No, you can use credit cards.
00:35:38.000 You just pay them off every month.
00:35:39.000 And the only other debt that's acceptable is a mortgage payment.
00:35:42.000 If you just start with that principle, you're going to be in a much better spot.
00:35:46.000 But how?
00:35:46.000 What if the guy comes from nothing and doesn't know where to start?
00:35:52.000 Then he shouldn't be getting married.
00:35:55.000 And then he's a boy.
00:35:58.000 Boys should not get married. 0.99
00:36:00.000 I love you.
00:36:00.000 I love you too.
00:36:01.000 But it's true.
00:36:02.000 I mean, if you are not capable of providing for a wife or a family...
00:36:06.000 Then you should take some time before you get married.
00:36:08.000 You've got to figure yourself out.
00:36:09.000 You've got to get a skill.
00:36:10.000 You've got to get disciplined.
00:36:11.000 There's a season for everything.
00:36:13.000 And I know that for some young girls out there or even older women who are still looking for their human, a season of waiting is to encourage you to just continue to trust God's timing.
00:36:27.000 And if you're in a season of pruning, that's probably because God's trying to refine you.
00:36:32.000 And if you're in a season of fruitfulness, then enjoy that and embrace that.
00:36:38.000 I will add to that that men have a much longer horizon of waiting than women. 0.80
00:36:46.000 And what men need to get equipped for actually might not be as natural.
00:36:51.000 Women can make very good mothers with almost no training. 1.00
00:36:55.000 It's just at 23, 24, women can make good mothers. 1.00
00:36:58.000 I don't know about that.
00:36:59.000 That's hit or miss.
00:37:00.000 Because some women, they have to be equipped for it too. 1.00
00:37:04.000 And their heart's prepared for it.
00:37:06.000 Or else they're going to stick their kid in front of Cocomelon. 1.00
00:37:08.000 Cocomelon? What is it?
00:37:09.000 Cocomelon? What is it?
00:37:11.000 Miss Rachel?
00:37:12.000 Oh, her voice kills me. 0.57
00:37:14.000 Those shows for hours.
00:37:17.000 But they have to be prepared for it too.
00:37:19.000 Again, equally yoked, right?
00:37:22.000 Equally yoked.
00:37:24.000 Next question.
00:37:24.000 How would you wait well for a spouse?
00:37:29.000 First of all, this is more of like a health standpoint.
00:37:32.000 Get your blood work done every six months.
00:37:35.000 Don't have sex before you get married. 0.98
00:37:36.000 Don't have sex before you get married. 0.98
00:37:39.000 Really be intentional about growing.
00:37:43.000 Down before you grow up and out, meaning make sure that your heart is so rooted in Christ.
00:37:49.000 Make sure that you're reading the Bible every single day.
00:37:52.000 Make sure that you're in a position where you're living your life, that he has to seek God in order to even be able to touch the slightest bit of your heart.
00:38:02.000 And make sure that you are taking good care of yourself.
00:38:05.000 Again, don't dress well.
00:38:08.000 Don't try.
00:38:09.000 You're not going to attract someone if you're not looking your best.
00:38:14.000 Not saying you have to look like you're on a red carpet every single day, but take care of yourself.
00:38:19.000 If you can't afford to get your nails and hair done, that's fine.
00:38:23.000 There's still ways to make yourself look like you.
00:38:26.000 I'm not saying from a prideful standpoint, but take...
00:38:32.000 Be grateful that God gave you the body he gave you.
00:38:36.000 Be grateful that you're healthy.
00:38:39.000 If you're not healthy, that you have doctors in your life to help get you there.
00:38:43.000 Just constantly be grateful.
00:38:45.000 There's always something to be grateful for and just find a way to be able to get yourself in the proper mindset and headspace of knowing that you are so...
00:38:56.000 Intentional about this time and you're in a stream of significance rather than focusing on what everyone else has and you are in a position where when and if the man has sought you out and he will tell you,
00:39:13.000 I am intentional about this.
00:39:14.000 I'm not trying to beat around the bush.
00:39:16.000 I want to date you and I want to marry you.
00:39:19.000 When it's that type of guy, you will know and you'll be ready.
00:39:21.000 You won't say, oh, I don't know about this.
00:39:24.000 Like, you will be prepared.
00:39:25.000 Just take care of yourself.
00:39:27.000 Take care of yourself.
00:39:28.000 I agree.
00:39:28.000 I think we have one more.
00:39:29.000 Okay. Do you want to pick the last one?
00:39:31.000 No, I want you to.
00:39:32.000 Okay. Oh, what do you think about schooling for kids?
00:39:36.000 What are you planning on doing?
00:39:37.000 We will be homeschooling, especially in the beginning.
00:39:41.000 At first, I will be honest, at first I was horrified thinking, I am horrible at math and geometry.
00:39:47.000 But I'm excited.
00:39:49.000 To some extent, I'm excited.
00:39:50.000 And this is why I think that women lose a portion of their brain capacity after every single kid. 1.00
00:39:57.000 It's because then you get excited to homeschool your kids and you get to relearn everything all over again.
00:40:03.000 And you're excited about learning about triangles and octagons and proper grammar all over again because you have that brain space to do it.
00:40:15.000 And you're excited.
00:40:16.000 So we will be homeschooling.
00:40:17.000 Plus, we want to travel with the kids.
00:40:19.000 And plus, to be honest with you, I do not want to deal with kids going up to either of our children and being like, I hate you because of your father.
00:40:27.000 Eventually, once they get old enough, they'll get into school.
00:40:31.000 Right, exactly.
00:40:32.000 Sixth, seventh, eighth grade, maybe.
00:40:33.000 Right, especially for sports, too.
00:40:35.000 We also travel a lot.
00:40:36.000 But I encourage everyone, if you can, homeschool.
00:40:39.000 And if you can't homeschool, I would love to know the reason why.
00:40:43.000 Or you can do pod schooling where you have a teacher come to your friend's house and you all kind of share a teacher.
00:40:50.000 I love you.
00:40:51.000 I love you too.
00:40:52.000 That was really short and quick, but we have more questions to go over.
00:40:55.000 It was a full episode.
00:40:56.000 Wow! Time with you flies.
00:40:59.000 Email us, freedom at charliekirk.com.
00:41:01.000 Check out biblein365.com.
00:41:04.000 Yeah, read the Bible with us in a year.
00:41:06.000 Plug it. 0.84
00:41:08.000 This is our ninth year, I think.
00:41:10.000 And so we read the Bible cover to cover.
00:41:13.000 We do not miss a day.
00:41:14.000 And it's a very special, unique community where you can get your Bible readings texted to you, emailed to you, or through the app.
00:41:22.000 And we would love to be on that journey with you to read the entire Bible with you.
00:41:27.000 365 days, words of encouragement, whatever you need, we're there.
00:41:30.000 We're real humans, not bots.
00:41:32.000 So, yeah, BibleIn365.com.
00:41:34.000 I love you.
00:41:35.000 I love you, baby.
00:41:35.000 God bless you guys.
00:41:36.000 Talk to you soon.
00:41:37.000 Thanks so much for listening, everybody.
00:41:38.000 Email us, as always, freedom at charliekirk.com.