Ep. 5 ｜ Chanale On Judaism Vs. Christianity, Conservatism, And Making Music In A Religious World
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Summary
Talking with Hanala, the host of the Weekly Squeeze, all about conservatism, the differences between Judaism and Christianity, and how she transitioned from music to podcasting, just like me. All this and more on today s episode of the Classically Abbey Podcast!
Transcript
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Talking with Hanala, the host of the Weekly Squeeze, all about conservatism, the differences
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between Judaism and Christianity, and how she transitioned from music to podcasting,
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just like me. All this and more on today's episode of the Classically Abbey podcast.
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Hello, and welcome to the Classically Abbey podcast. I'm so glad you're here. Here we
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talk about classic living, traditional values, and modern femininity. If you aren't already
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subscribed to the podcast, make sure to do so and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. Today,
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I'm interviewing Hanala from the Weekly Squeeze podcast, and I'm so excited you are here. Thank
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you so much. It is my pleasure. I'm thrilled. Hi, Abbey.
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We made a connection, and now you are online, and I'm so excited to have you here. If you
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are new to the podcast, we have generally three or four segments. When I have an interview,
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it's three segments. We do an interview, and then we follow that up with a faith talk,
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and we finish up answering premium subscriber questions to my sub stack. So let's just get
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right into the interview. I want people to get to know you. I want people to know who
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you are, and I think that you're such an interesting person. So let's start there.
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Can you tell my subscribers a little bit about yourself, how you got started in podcasting,
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All right. So my name is Hanala. I'm a Floridian, born and raised. I grew up in Miami Beach, Florida,
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typical American. Long story short, after having a traditional Jewish education, I ended up in New
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York City looking for my husband. I was officially on the dating market, and because New York is such
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a hub for singles, and it was even back in the day, 15 years ago, 20 years ago, I moved into an
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apartment there, and I just started serial dating. That was the process. And then, much to my parents'
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dismay, I met someone that I was not set up with. He was working on 47th Street, you know, but he was
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my bus shirt. He was my destined one. And it took a while until my parents accepted that maybe it wasn't
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exactly what they had in mind for me. But, you know, we're here we are all these years later. So
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definitely, I made the right choice. Right? Yes, it worked out. So we lived in New York for a while. And then
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after I had my first three kids, my first three girls, I said, I cannot take this anymore. I'm
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moving to Florida. And I moved back to Florida. And we bought a house and everything was terrific.
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And then the 2016 election rolled around. And I was just like, I was really, really like entrenched.
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Like, I think I lost part of my eyesight just from Twitter alone. Like, that's how like obsessed I was.
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And at some point, we were sitting outside one night looking up at the stars. And I said to my
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husband, you know, I know, you're Israeli, and I know you don't want to go back. But I think we
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should make Aliyah. I think we should move to Israel. And that is pretty much what we did. And I
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brought my I mean, people said I was crazy, like, you're going to kill your music career. But you
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know, God has a way to help everyone no matter where they are. And here we are. And my music career
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is thriving. And the podcast is doing well, you know, as well. So yeah, I've, you know, followed my
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destiny, I would say. And yeah, you asked me what my mission is. Well, as a singer, my mission was
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always multi multi leveled, or, you know, there are a lot of things that that were important to me.
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First of all, obviously, sharing like Jewish tradition and my culture through music. And I
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performed all over the world for all different types of communities. So that was like, really
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important that my music have a message, you know, my music always had a message, you know, bringing
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people together. As an observant Jewish singer, I want to, you know, create that sense of community,
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wherever I go and connect people from all different backgrounds and beliefs. Music is obviously
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uplifting, you know, Jewish music, in particular, has always been used to, you know, evoke joy and
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comfort and inspiration. So I really tried to share those positive emotions with my audience.
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Educating people, you know, there's a lot to learn, not just from the music, but even in between
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the songs, when I used to speak and communicate, it was an opportunity for me to be like a bit of a
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teacher. So that was always fun. And then, you know, expressing devotion to God, because, you know,
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we sing in the synagogue, and in all faiths, music is used to connect. It's just, it reveals a very
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spiritual side of you. And I always felt like I was able to express my love and devotion to God
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through song. So I would say that's pretty much my mission in a nutshell.
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I love that mission. That's incredible. I mean, music is so important to me, too.
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People know I am a professional opera singer. I haven't sung professionally in a little while,
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but that was what I did before I started Classically Abbey. And I think one of the
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things I've always talked about is how music is a universal language, no matter where,
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no matter what language you actually speak, you can communicate through music.
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True. Yeah. And I saw that time and time again, because I would go travel to different
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communities like that was my job. I was a performing artist on the road. And I would walk into a room
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of people that I never met. And often they were different ages. They were different.
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You know, their religious affiliations were different. And as soon as I took my guitar and
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started strumming and everybody relaxed a little, like that instant connection was made. It was so
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powerful. And people used to tell me, you know, I'm, let's say, a leader in my synagogue for all
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these years. I give classes once a week. I've never seen my crowd so turned on as they were when you
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were singing. Like, it's so powerful. And I said, well, this is just what I do. And, and, you know,
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everything else just kind of happens because the power of music.
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Yeah. So what made you transition from music, or rather, maybe not transition, because you're
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doing both, but in a sense, transition from music into podcasting?
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Okay, so I feel bad. I didn't get into podcasting earlier. I don't know why. There was also a time
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when I felt that I didn't get into social media earlier. But I'm a little bit of a late bloomer
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in that sense. I remember, you know, thinking to myself, Facebook, Facebook, who needs it? And
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then everybody was on Facebook and Instagram, Instagram, who needs it? And then everybody was
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on Instagram and podcasting the same thing. So I kind of fell into it. Pretty recently, actually.
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And I think this is something we also have to unpack, because your listeners might not know
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that Jewish women don't, or observant Jewish women, Orthodox Jews, we don't sing for men.
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So I have never sung for a mixed audience. I've never sang for men before. I will share a funny
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story, though, quickly. You guys will appreciate. I once sang in Pearl Harbor, and it was an older
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crowd. And I looked out in the crowd, and I see in the back row, there's like an 80 year old woman with
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her 80 year old husband. And I was like, okay, I guess, you know, he slipped under the radar.
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And they came over to me after the show. And he was like, that was so amazing. That was so
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terrific. And his wife looks at me, and she goes, please forgive me. He thinks you're Barbra Streisand.
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I was like, okay, we could, you know, I could, you can take that compliment. I could take that
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compliment. Exactly. But really, I don't, I don't sing for men. Because of, you know, that there's
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actually a spiritual reason for that, which we could get into if you want. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.
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Yeah. I would love to, you know, I think it's always interesting for my listeners to understand
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where certain things that we do come from. Now, I didn't observe that. I sang for men. And I have
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kind of some rabbinical opinions that lean a little bit more lenient on that topic. But I also know
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kolisha, which is the term for this of women not singing in front of men, is very important for very,
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for many women, and they consider it halacha, meaning law. So can you explain the concept a
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little bit? Yeah, totally, totally. Okay. So men and women have a different criteria for sexual
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arousal. We know that, you know, hearing, and according to Jewish tradition, hearing a woman
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sing is sexually arousing for a man. And by sexual arousal, I mean, like, he's thinking of her in terms
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of her physical dimensions, as opposed to her spiritual qualities. So while it might be hard
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for a woman to imagine, to imagine such a thing, you know, the sages were very in tune with human
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nature, they were. And this rule has been kept by Jews for 1000s of years, because men and women do
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have this different criteria for sexual arousal. So with this in mind, you know, the Torah set up these
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barriers to protect society's moral fabric, essentially, and the emphasis was was placed
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to counter the reality of the man's weaker character in those areas. You know, hearing the pleasant
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melody of a woman singing could be an issue for a man. And therefore, we do our best to refrain from
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exposing them to this erotic situation. Now, you could argue that, you know, things have changed,
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and we're in a modern world, and that sensitivity maybe has been lost, like the sensuality of a
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woman's voice. And that's, and there's room to, there is room to say that to suggest that. And
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like you said, different rabbis have different opinions. Yeah, I mean, what I'll say, yeah, go
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ahead, you finish. But however, there is, there is a story in Greek mythology, which I always found
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fascinating. I don't know exactly the details, but the sirens that were called the sirens, they were
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female seductresses, and they used to lure sailors with their voices. So the concept that
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men could be lured in by a woman's sweet voice, that's not, it's not crazy to, you know, that is
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the reality. So even though we might be, you know, enlightened today, if anything, you could even argue
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the opposite, that like, the media influence that has actually created this atmosphere where the
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sexualization of women and objectification of women is even stronger than ever. Yeah. So,
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you know, and just to wrap it up, you know, people listening might be saying, well, what does that
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like, if the men can't control themselves, why do the women have to suffer the restrictions? And
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ultimately, it's because we're all in this together. And we all have to do our, our share to help each
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other out. So, you know, it's in, it's my advantage, it's, it's in my advantage to help men keep
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things under control. It is in my advantage. And it just, and ultimately, it serves both men and
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women to avoid the situations, which will lead to promiscuity. Yeah. So I think that that's exactly
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right. I mean, here, I'll explain a little bit about where I, where I stood at this, in this point,
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and also where I agree with you, which is, I think women should be much more flattered by the idea that
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there are so, there are so many things that we do that we don't even think about that are very
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attractive to men. And singing is one of those things. And that's a beautiful thing, right?
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That a woman can attract a man just through her voice. I'm always saying to women, like,
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stop being offended. That's a great thing that we can do that. Right. And it's not, I mean,
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it's not a good thing that we've desensitized ourselves, desensitize people more and more over time
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to things that should be attractive to one another, where what used to be attractive,
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maybe showing, you know, the upper thigh area, if you wore like a shorter skirt, or if your skirt
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rode up a little bit now is like, who cares? Because people wear short shorts and show the
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bottom of their, you know, bums with what they're wearing. And it's not actually better for
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relationships when we desensitize ourselves to the things that could cause us to be attracted to one
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another. So, and it's not just a religious thing, you know, Bradley Cooper, I saw him on an
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interview and he was talking about Lady Gaga when they were singing The Shallow. I remember what
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movie it was in. And he said that when she starts singing, the electricity in the room changes. And
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this is, it's not a religious thing. He just said when, he said, time stands still when Lady Gaga
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starts singing. That's how powerful her voice is. And you could say that about Andrea Bucelli,
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but when a woman sings, the power is just all the more greater because she's, you know, feminine and
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beautiful and attractive and appealing and all those things. Yeah. So as far as my own practice
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of it, the thing that I came to, and I don't know where I stand on it now, but the thing that I came
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to was you shouldn't be a stumbling block is kind of the idea, uh, which is sort of in line with what
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you were saying earlier. But if you are going to sing, it is more on the man not to attend.
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So that was my, the way I practiced it at the time. Um, but I understand a hundred percent
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the people who practice Kul Isha and take it seriously. It makes sense to me and I get it.
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And that's why I share my music on social media because I mean, the majority of my followers are
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women, but I can't, um, limit my career to that extent because of, of, of men who might be, you know,
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maybe not following the law or doing what they're not supposed to. And there might be men who
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don't follow that particular halacha and on, you know, and they're entitled and I'm entitled to
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share my music. So, yeah, I think it works out great. I love it. I love it. And I'm so glad we
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got to have that discussion because I think it's really interesting as always to introduce people
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who don't know a lot about these Jewish laws to more ideas that they've never heard of and explain
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where they come from. So what, so that kind of leads into my next question, which is, you might know
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that many of my subscribers are Christian and I find they're often curious about the differences
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and similarities between Judaism and Christianity. So I figured I would kind of say my, what I think
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is the biggest difference and the biggest similarity. Um, and then I would love to hear your thoughts on
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that because I think it's so interesting from an Orthodox perspective. So for me, I think that the
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biggest difference between, between Judaism and Christianity is simply the fact that it's an
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ethnicity that for us, when we have a child, when a woman has a child, it's passed through the mother,
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whether that child is Jewish. And even if you're not a religious Jew, even if you don't observe the
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laws or even believe in God, you are still Jewish. That doesn't really exist in Christianity in the same
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way. But the biggest similarity is the values. I mean, they're called Judeo Judeo Christian values
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for a reason that we all are sharing these traditional values that are so important that
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make up, as you said, the social fabric of society like that, or rather the moral fabric of society
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that is so important. And I think that that's really the biggest overlap. So now I'd love to hear what
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you think. Okay. So I dug a little deeper because I really wanted to, you know, you really wanted to
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get to, and you gave me some food for thought because, you know, you gave me kind of an outline
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of what we might talk about. And when you mentioned Christianity, I said, well, what do I actually know
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about the differences? You know, I grew up Jewish. We didn't study Christianity. It's not something I
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know much about, honestly. So I went back to the original sin. So let's talk about the original sin
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for a second. Adam and Eve are in the garden of Eden. God tells them not to eat the apple from the
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tree of knowledge and they eat the apple. And we all know that they were evicted from the garden of Eden.
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And that all ended quicker than, you know, one, two, three. So although the Christian idea
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does differ greatly from the Jewish idea, both concepts are actually, let me restart. So Judaism
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believes that the original sin had a significant cosmic repercussion in the world and that Adam and
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Eve were created as perfect beings who are connected to God. And then they sinned and they were separated
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from God. It created a separation between them. So Christianity views the original sin as like
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an irrevocable and like an unchangeable blemish, a blight on the human soul, making connection to God
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impossible except through faith in Jesus. That's the core essence of Christianity. Judaism, on the other
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hand, teaches that the essence of the divine soul always remains untainted and holy. And the sin
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actually only introduced a secondary soul known as our animal soul. And that contains the drive for
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egotism and selfishness and hedonism and all the things that pull us away from God. So, you know,
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we learn in Judaism, this hopeful vision that we do have the freedom and the capacity to liberate
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ourselves and achieve a level of holiness and perfection and reconnection with God. And we could
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fight, you know, we can win over those negative forces and that through the Torah and through the actual
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practice of Judaism, we reconnect and we kind of, you know, tikkun olam is an expression that's been
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hijacked by the reformed community, but ultimately it means to repair the world and bring it back to
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the original state that it was in, in the Garden of Eden. So that's why Judaism places such a strong
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emphasis on observance and practice and Christianity prioritizes faith. You know, they talk a lot about
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faith. What's in your heart? What do you believe? Do you believe? Are you a believer? You know,
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observant Jews, we have so many commandments, 613 commandments. And like, you know, from the morning to
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the night, we're busy, preoccupied. You don't even have time to think. You don't even have time to
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believe. You know, God gave the Bible, God gave the Torah on Mount Sinai and the Jews said, we will do
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and then we will hear. First, we're just going to do. And God kept them busy. So I think the big,
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the biggest difference between Christianity and Judaism is the actual practice versus the faith,
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because you can be a Jew and never practice Judaism and you still remain a Jew, but to be a
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Christian that has no faith, then, you know, you have to explore and figure out why you're lacking in
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an area. Does that make sense? Yeah, I think that's a great point. I love that. That's really,
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really fascinating. And I'm sure that our, my subscribers will, uh, will let that, let us know
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what they think about that. Oh, by all means. Yeah, absolutely. I love that stuff. It's not about
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better or worse, by the way. It's not about better or worse. It's just a different approach.
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It's absolutely just a different approach. And I, I, uh, I respect Christians and I respect
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Muslims and I respect all people of faith and people of not faith as well, or, you know, who don't believe,
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but ultimately we have to respect our differences and, um, you know, be honest about them. And that's
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exactly. And I was going to say, and I think that there's nothing wrong with drawing those comparisons
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as in a way to understand each other better so that we know where each, you know, where we're coming
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from. We, we all are, you know, doing our best to serve God. It's just a question of, you know,
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what that looks like. That's true. So you're a conservative woman. You're very open about it.
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Okay. So how do you feel that your faith informs your politics? I think a lot of people believe
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that Judaism, you know, they hear about Jews and they assume we're on the left because so many
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non-observant Jews are on the left, but that's really not the case for Orthodox Judaism. So how
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do you find that your Orthodox Judaism informs your beliefs as far as, uh, politics and conservatism?
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Right. So I really just got into politics actually when Obama was running for president,
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I remember looking at the TV and saying, he looks like a nice guy. And my husband's like,
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he's a Democrat. I'm like, who cares? He's cool. I was really not so into politics until a little
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later in the game. Like I said, I'm a late bloomer. Um, but then when I got into it, it became a little
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bit of an obsession, but you know, I think there was a Pew research, um, a poll or a survey done rather
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in America at this point, 75% of Orthodox Jews are overwhelmingly, um, affiliating with the
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Republican party. And I think that has a lot to do with Trump's handling of policy in Israel. I mean,
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it created a major shift. It was, it was practically a revolution, you know, for a president to be a
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president to be so outspoken in his support for Israel, especially considering the climate in America
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where things have been shifting more and more in that sense. So I think that's, you know, definitely
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an issue because I'm in Israel. Um, I'm an Orthodox Jew. I have a strong connection to the land
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and I'm going to support the political parties that, that prioritize my country's security and my
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interest. That's just the reality of it. And also there's this element of religious conservatism,
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you know, Orthodox Judaism, the values, the traditional family structures, the social values,
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they really do align with right-wing political ideologies. They do. Um, you know, we, we take issue
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with liberal policies on abortion, gay rights, drug, you know, legalizing drugs. Um, and, and that's
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just the reality of it. I don't like saying that I am a Republican and, and, and, you know, I, I,
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because there are things that don't, maybe I don't identify with as, as a Jew. And I, I recognize
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that the Republican, um, party is flawed in many ways as is the Democrat party. So I, I'm not,
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and I'm not as patriotic anymore, perhaps because I don't live in America, but I would say my
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conservatism is intertwined with my, you know, Jewish values. Yeah, no, that makes sense. And
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that's why I often use the, I would say I'm a much more interested in culture than I am in politics.
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So I, and that's really what I focus on in my, in my chant, on my channel, on my podcast.
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And I talk about this stuff from a conservative perspective. I, I very, very rarely, if ever use
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the term Republican, because I much more align with conservative values than the Republican party.
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Right. That's, that's a very good point, actually. Cause I was actually thinking to myself,
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I don't even know if I'm a Republican anymore. I might be a libertarian. I just feel like I've kind
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of veered a little more center as I got, get older and I'm a little more open-minded and it doesn't,
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and I don't know, I don't really identify with a particular party. So I like that idea. I am
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conservative and you know, that that's basically what it all comes down to. Yeah, absolutely. So
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I want to talk a little bit about femininity, womanhood, motherhood. So I have two questions
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for you on that front. The first is you're a singer and a musician. You told us that you travel doing
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your, doing your music. So how did you make that work as a religious Jew and as a wife and as a mom?
00:22:32.880
Okay. So before I had kids, um, everything was la-di-da. I grabbed my guitar. I was at the door.
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And then once I had children, I remember getting on stage in my sequence with my,
00:22:44.260
you know, my big, my shaito, my big wig, I cover my hair and I, you know, you could just stick a
00:22:50.100
curly, I have a curly wig. You could just, I just stuck it on my head and put on a pair of high
00:22:54.160
heels. And suddenly I was Hamila, the performer. It was like such a transformation. I remember laughing
00:22:58.380
and telling the audience an hour ago, I was on my knees giving my kids a bath. I literally kid you
00:23:03.160
not. Like that's how, that's how down to earth I was about the reality of it. There, there was no
00:23:08.680
rider that included a fancy green room with only green M&Ms and then all that, you know, you know,
00:23:14.900
filtered water, undistilled, like it's reality. You know, I, I would sometimes take a bus. I once
00:23:21.820
performed somewhere and I actually had to take a bus because my husband was working that night.
00:23:25.720
And when I got there, um, a little girl said, Oh my God, you're Hanila. How did you get here?
00:23:30.000
Did you take a private airplane? I'm like, no, I took the bus. So there's definitely like this
00:23:34.420
reality check when you have children that no matter how big of a star you are, um, five minutes ago,
00:23:40.080
you were nobody. Like you were just somebody's mom, not nobody, but somebody's mom. And they didn't
00:23:44.840
care what you, you know, what about your profession. So for me, like juggling being a singer and being a
00:23:50.800
mom, obviously, you know, there's the, the, the, the scheduling, like you have to work out
00:23:55.740
babysitters that my husband's around. I tried not to travel around the weekend. So I could be home
00:23:59.760
for Shabbat. So that's, you know, my religious obligations obviously are a priority and they
00:24:04.320
come first. Um, and as far as like managing with the kids, it is a balance. It was really always a
00:24:10.940
balance. You know, um, I have to, I have to obviously make a living and do what I love and
00:24:17.240
feel fulfilled. But, um, there were times when, and even now, like I make, I make choices that,
00:24:23.520
that, that work out better for my family. Like my husband's been in America for the last few weeks
00:24:27.240
and he's working. And that means a lot of home time for me. And as a creative that could get
00:24:32.740
rather stifling, but I have to remind myself, I am a star in my own house. I am a celebrity to my
00:24:39.320
children. When I pay attention to them, I am their entire universe. So yeah, it feels great to have
00:24:45.000
the applause and it feels great to get dressed up and go out and people should clap for me and tell
00:24:49.420
me that I'm amazing. But when my little kid, you know, my little son, my baby, he's seven. When he
00:24:55.300
says to me, please, can you sing? You are my sunshine to me one more time before I go into bed. And he
00:25:00.480
just relaxes underneath my touch. I really feel such a warmth in my heart. It really does match that,
00:25:07.520
that high that I have after I sing. So for me, it was very much about being realistic,
00:25:13.980
being practical and allowing myself to realize that, you know, maybe I'll never be a multimillionaire
00:25:21.200
with, you know, an Oscar or Grammy, but I have so many things that a lot of other singers don't,
00:25:28.380
you know, their lives are so empty. They have millions of dollars and no love, no family.
00:25:31.540
Um, and you know, life is not so great for them. So I'm just trying to remind myself what I do have.
00:25:36.920
Yeah. I love it. So last question, sort of putting you on the spot. Cause I didn't actually
00:25:41.700
ask this question in our, in our outline that I had sent you, but
00:25:45.620
what, if you could describe femininity in three words, what three words would you choose?
00:25:52.460
I could not, um, think of a better question for me, Hanala. And I'll tell you why, because my name
00:25:58.920
is Hannah and Hannah in Hebrew is spelled with three letters. Hey, the head in my name, or my,
00:26:06.600
my name rather is an acronym. My name is an acronym for the three most important commandments that a
00:26:10.980
Jewish woman has. That is challah, which is, um, separating the needed dough before you bake it.
1.00
00:26:17.220
Uh, you know, this was in the times of the temple, it was donated to the priests, the dough, um, a
00:26:23.240
portion of the dough every week, um, Nida, which is the laws of family purity, which we don't have to
00:26:28.020
get into, but anyone could do a quick Google search for the Jewish laws of family purity and see what
00:26:32.660
that's all about. But basically it's separating when you have your period and going, um, for ritual
00:26:36.840
immersion every month. Um, and then, um, the hay is had Lakat Hanayrot, which is lighting the
00:26:42.680
Shabbat, the Shabbos candles or keeping Shabbat. So for me, my femininity, a ties into my name
00:26:49.000
because that's the acronym for Hannah, which is my name. Um, also my name actually means grace.
00:26:57.400
Chet nun, chen means grace and grace is a very feminine quality. So I grew up, um, in an Orthodox
00:27:05.480
home, but we were also Hasidim actually, and not the ones with the curly payas, but rather, um,
00:27:10.360
Chabad Hasidim and the Lubavitcher was a revolutionary leader in his approach towards
00:27:16.700
women in Judaism. And I grew up being encouraged to be a strong woman. My grandmother was a published
00:27:21.640
poet. My great aunt was a published recording artist. She was the first woman in, in the history
00:27:26.720
of Jewish music to create albums of, of children's music in the 1970s. We grew up listening to her
00:27:33.320
records. It had never been done before. I don't know if you know, know the song Hashem gave us a
00:27:37.140
present. Do you know what it was? He gave us that, you know what she wrote that song and all
00:27:42.180
these like little preschool songs. Yeah. So I grew up knowing that we can do anything, but at the same
00:27:46.900
time, we were taught very, um, specifically that it was because of the Jewish women that, that,
00:27:54.840
that we were merited to leave Egypt. It was because of the Jewish women, the crown of the Jewish
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00:28:01.420
popular, of the Jewish people that we continued to, um, convey the important messages that were in
00:28:07.520
the Torah and to maintain our identity and to, you know, keep the chain, um, alive or keep our
00:28:14.180
traditions alive and keep the, you know, not break the chain. And for me, you know, tapping into my
00:28:20.180
strengths as a woman and living a life as a Torah Jew were always completely cohesive. I was never told
00:28:27.120
to lower my voice. I was never told to cover up and be quiet and go away. I was told be bold, be
00:28:33.580
bright, be feminine, be graceful, revel in the commandments, revel in the mitzvot that bring out
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your femininity and you will reap the benefits by having a, a great home, which I do. I have four great
00:28:46.040
kids and a loving husband, um, be a great career and see meaning and, and, um, fulfillment in my
00:28:52.780
spiritual life. So for me, I would have to say the three words are Chala, Nida, and Hadlakat Hanerot,
00:29:00.700
all Hebrew. So now let's get into our faith talk for the week. So this week's Torah portion is
00:29:09.580
Beshalach, which means when he sent, as in Pharaoh sending the Israelites out of Egypt. So I'm going to
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give a quick overview of, uh, this, of this week's Torah portion of the Parsha. That's that word in
00:29:22.820
Hebrew. In this week's Torah portion, the Jews are sent out of Egypt by Pharaoh. God immediately
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00:29:29.780
takes them to the Red Sea, knowing that Pharaoh will believe that the Israelites are lost and
00:29:34.140
trapped in the desert. Because of that, Pharaoh is planning, he will chase after the Jews, regretting
00:29:40.560
his decision to let them go. So Pharaoh does that. And the Jews cry out to Moses asking why God took
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them out of Egypt only to have them die in the desert. God splits the Red Sea and brings the
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Jews safely through it while the Egyptians plunge in after them. But God brings the waters down upon
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the Egyptians and drowns them. The Israelites praise God for saving their lives. After walking for three
00:30:04.520
days without water, they come to Marah, but the water is too bitter to drink. Moses throws in a piece
00:30:10.000
of wood and the water becomes sweet. After a month of wandering in the desert, the Israelites have run out of
00:30:15.300
food. God promises to bring them manna during the day and quails at night. Moses directs the
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Israelites on the exact ways to gather the manna and many of them ignore his instructions. Later,
00:30:27.060
they run out of water again and Moses hits a rock which issues forth water. At the end of this Torah
00:30:32.560
portion, the Jews fight Amalek, which is a group of people that's very, has a lot of notoriety
00:30:39.740
in the Jewish faith that we, they're kind of like our lifelong enemy. And when Moses raises his arms,
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the Jews begin winning the fight. But when he lowers them, Amalek wins. He sits down and two
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00:30:51.780
people support his arms to keep them in the air and the Israelites win the war. So that is this
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00:30:56.860
week's Torah portion. Um, I don't know about you, but I love Exodus. I love Schmote. What do you, what do you
00:31:02.040
totally? Yeah. Right. It's so amazing. Well, first of all, when we talk about it with our kids, it's the most,
00:31:06.620
uh, you know, it's a story, it's a beautiful story. I mean, the Prince of Egypt is just a phenomenal, uh,
00:31:13.280
phenomenal film because it's, there's, it's full of adventure and it's full of, um, drama and, and tension.
00:31:19.300
And then there's this redemption at the end and freedom of the slaves. I mean, it's just such a powerful
00:31:23.820
story for me. I personally love the part when the Jews come to the Dead Sea and, uh, and it splits
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the Red Sea. I'm sorry. I live in Israel. So I'm thinking about the Dead Sea, but the Red Sea splits
00:31:34.920
and the Jews cross. And when they get to the other side, Miriam, who's Moses's sister takes out her
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tambourine and she starts dancing and singing with the Jewish women. And, and it's, it's so amazing
00:31:47.220
because it's right there in the Bible, how the women use their voices to inspire and to reinvigorate
00:31:55.900
a nation that was dehydrated, exhausted. I mean, the fear that they felt as Pharaoh's, you know,
00:32:02.360
the Pharaoh's troops are approaching that they have, they would have to go back to Egypt. You know,
00:32:06.720
they were, there were Jews that didn't want to leave Egypt. They, you know, where they were going
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or what was the, what the future held. So for them to have a moment of sheer joy, when they could just
00:32:15.800
let go and dance and celebrate and hold hands with their sisters and connect and, and use their
00:32:21.860
voices to praise God. I think it's one of the most powerful moments, certainly, um, in, you know, in,
00:32:27.180
in the, in this, uh, in, um, in Shemot, in the book of Shemot of names. And, um, it, it's something
00:32:34.720
I've, I've sung about, it's something I've written music about. And for me, that's why this particular
00:32:40.120
Parsha was always very special. This particular, um, you know, Sedra of, of Shemot. Yeah.
00:32:45.960
I felt totally exactly the same way. I always loved that part as a singer, as a woman, it always
00:32:51.040
really inspired me because not only were they raising their voices in, in song, it was in praise
00:32:56.620
of God. And, and to me that made it feel like anytime I raised my voice in song, even if I wasn't
00:33:03.000
singing a prayer, it was directly in praise of God for giving me this voice, for giving me this
00:33:09.380
opportunity to sing. Yeah. Well, the music is, is an expression of the soul. I mean, there's no
00:33:14.620
question about that. I actually just had this conversation on my podcast with a journalist
00:33:18.260
named Eli Lake. He's really like square, you know, he writes for Bloomberg, like really like, you know,
00:33:24.280
one of those stiff, you know, professionals. And then he starts talking about music and he tells me
00:33:29.340
that he's a huge hip hop fan. I'm like, I would never, ever have imagined that you like
00:33:32.860
rap music. And he asked me if I feel that there's some sort of spiritual element in music. And I
00:33:39.200
said, absolutely. Music is the pen of the soul. And that's why you have the most, well, obviously
00:33:44.760
we could talk about classical music all day because that's, you know, your specialty. We
00:33:48.420
know that some of the music, the music pieces created by these that, but by these composers
00:33:54.440
is just beyond comprehension, the sophistication of it. I mean, this stuff could be analyzed for
00:34:00.920
generations to come. Can't compare it to some of the stuff that's coming out now. But the
00:34:07.260
reason for that is because the capacity to sing is a godly quality. It really is. And I do think
00:34:13.500
that it's something that we can tap into that could create that connection. Sometimes you cannot
00:34:19.140
connect to God unless it's through a song, unless it's through, you know, putting on a, whether it's
00:34:25.380
your favorite singer, or if you're, if you're a person of faith and you go to church and you go to
00:34:29.500
synagogue and they're singing that, that hymn or that, you know, prayer that suddenly, you know,
00:34:35.120
you feel emotional and, and that's good. That's great that we're supposed to have those tools to
00:34:40.280
help us in our service of God. So I believe that a hundred percent talent is a gift and it's a godly
00:34:46.260
one. Yeah. I love that. And I totally agree. So we had a quick technical difficulty given that we
00:34:53.100
are recording around the world from each other, but we're back. And I want to talk about the fact
00:35:01.180
that the Jews don't trust in God after having all of these miracles done for them, right? They just saw
00:35:07.320
all of the plagues happen in Egypt. Like the most you could ever see God's presence just happened to
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them. And then they spend this entire Torah portion complaining, whining, showing fear, not trusting in
00:35:22.120
God, right? Like, it's so interesting that we see the Jewish people who have just seen, and this
00:35:28.380
happens throughout the Torah, right? We see them get, like they receive the Torah or they're told
00:35:33.900
they're going to receive the Torah. And two minutes later, they're like building the golden calf, right?
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00:35:37.640
Like they just don't have that innate trust in them. So why? So I think there's two parts to this.
00:35:43.980
One is that it is human nature to forget the good quickly. When something good happens to us,
00:35:50.820
when we feel like God has given us blessings within two or three days, like that fades.
00:35:57.080
This is actually, it's interesting. I'm reading a book called The Happiness Hypothesis.
00:36:00.520
And it's called The Adjustment Principle. And the idea that we adjust to any circumstances very
00:36:06.120
quickly and go back to kind of like middle ground. So like God does something amazing for us. We don't
00:36:11.440
just live our lives thinking, okay, God's going to continually do amazing things for us. We can notice
00:36:16.580
his presence. We can notice his miracles. Instead, we just kind of revert back to, well,
00:36:22.180
why isn't God doing something for me today? There must be something wrong. As well, the Jews had been
1.00
00:36:28.220
lowered and debased in Egypt and removed from their holiness and from God's presence, which makes it
1.00
00:36:33.180
easy for them to forget God's miracles, even after a few days when they just saw, even days after they
00:36:39.900
just saw it in full force. So how can we incorporate this into our lives? And I want to hear your thoughts
00:36:45.000
on it too. So I'm just kind of dropping all of my thoughts first, but what can we learn from this?
00:36:50.800
When something bad is happening, instead of complaining that God doesn't care about us,
00:36:54.820
we should try to remember God's miracles and pray from a place of knowing God is there,
00:36:59.140
rather than from a place of whining that God isn't doing things on our schedule. But I think even more
00:37:05.460
importantly and more relevant is that we're living in our own version of Egypt. We are living in a world
00:37:12.480
that is debased and that has so much bad going on that we have to constantly kind of tune out.
00:37:20.020
And it's important that we not lose our connection to God and not lose our holiness. And it's our
00:37:26.640
responsibility not to allow ourselves to become debased, but instead to stay close to God's presence.
00:37:34.160
So I just wanted to share that thought, but I'd love to hear your thoughts on that. Like,
00:37:37.580
how can we do that? How can we keep ourselves separate from everything that we're constantly
00:37:42.220
bombarded with, whether that be in media, movies, music, whatever, and stay close to God?
00:37:48.720
Right. Well, I think that when we, uh, let's think about, let's say for dieting, for example,
00:37:55.300
you know, what the, the, the problem that people have when they start dieting is that they're hungry
00:38:00.600
the whole time. Like they, they just need to eat. And most nutritionists will advise crowding out
00:38:05.860
instead of thinking about what you're not going to eat. Think about all the good stuff you're going
00:38:09.220
to take in. You're going to have a huge salad and you're going to have all these healthy proteins
00:38:12.720
and you're going to satisfy yourself in that way. So that emptiness is kind of filled because it's
00:38:17.720
very hard just to say, you can't do this and you can't do that. And you can't eat that because you
00:38:21.120
are going to feel like something is lacking. So I think that in general, um, you know, inspiration,
00:38:26.140
it's fleeting because it's tied to all these emotions and all these external factors that are always
00:38:32.220
changing. Right. So people feel they're, they're motivated and you're inspired and you're in,
00:38:37.600
you know, you're in the moment and then it kind of fades away. So it's really hard to sustain those,
00:38:42.880
those high levels of inspiration and motivation without a plan. You need a clear plan. You need
00:38:48.460
actionable steps to turn the inspiration and turn the ideas into reality. So if you want that
00:38:54.360
inspiration to last longer, um, you have to anchor it like in values and in goals and engage in
00:39:00.620
activities and behaviors that bring joy and meaning to your life. And I think when the
00:39:04.180
Jews left Egypt, they hadn't received the Torah yet. They did not have a plan of action. They
1.00
00:39:08.440
didn't have concrete ways to manifest, to channel, um, this inspiration and this gratitude. So because
00:39:15.720
they're humans and it's human nature, it came in really quickly and it went really quickly. So I
00:39:21.400
think the lesson we could learn is that when you are feeling those moments of inspiration,
00:39:25.300
don't assume you're going to wake up tomorrow ready to change your life because today you had,
00:39:29.800
you know, a great experience either in synagogue or reading a book or listening to an audio book,
00:39:34.120
we're all like jazzed and excited. My life is going to change today. And then, you know,
00:39:38.100
bad habits just creep up one, two, three, you really have to put an action and plan and have
00:39:43.220
concrete steps that will keep you getting towards your goal and give you those little moments of
00:39:49.080
pride and success and, you know, gratification. And then the inspiration when it comes will only
00:39:54.460
boost your journey. Does that make sense? I love it. I think that's absolutely correct. I like
00:40:00.740
the idea of, they always say you can't not do something. You can only do something. So if you're
00:40:08.280
trying not to do something, instead of saying, I'm not going to do that thing, you say, I'm going to
00:40:12.160
replace, it's exactly what you were mentioning. You're going to replace it with a different action.
00:40:15.060
And I think that's exactly right. And that's the way that we have to live our lives in a positive
00:40:20.200
manner. We have to do things that are good and fill our souls, our hearts, our cups in with things
00:40:27.160
that will keep us close to God will keep us, you know, strong in our faith, strong in our beliefs,
00:40:31.460
even when we're surrounded by things that we're, you can't live on inspiration alone. You cannot
00:40:37.020
live on inspiration alone. Yes. It's got to be part of something bigger. I love that. That's
00:40:42.460
interesting stuff. So now let's get into my premium subscriber questions. If you would
00:40:50.160
like to submit questions for podcasts, just like this, make sure to head over to
00:40:55.180
classicallyabby.substack.com and become a premium subscriber today. So let's start off with this
00:41:01.920
question. And these were specifically for you. So we've got a couple that are just specifically
00:41:06.420
because people knew you were coming on. So what regional differences are there between people who
00:41:11.700
practice Orthodox Judaism? When you mean, what do you mean by regional? So I think what she's talking
00:41:18.060
about is, do people who are from Morocco practice differently than people from Germany,
00:41:23.120
around the world? Okay, so obviously, there's the major two groups of the Jewish ethnicity,
00:41:30.360
which are which consists of Sephardim and Ashkenazim. So the Jews that came from the Middle East and North
00:41:37.740
Africa, those are the Sephardic Jews or the dark skinned Jews. And those range from, you know, Ethiopian
00:41:42.700
who are black. And then, you know, my husband's Bukharian, and he grew up in Uzbekistan on the
00:41:49.320
border of Russia, which is not the Middle East. But they are Sephardic Jews as well, originating
00:41:55.360
generations before from Persia. So you have the Sephardic Jews, and then you have Ashkenazic Jews
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like myself, the very white ones who need to wear a lot of sunscreen. And we came from Western Europe,
00:42:05.400
essentially. Now, all Jews, originally, as our one tribe, were in the land of Israel thousands of
00:42:13.040
years ago, but when we were expelled time and time again, and, you know, we ended up all in every
00:42:18.740
corner of the world. So as far as observance goes, you know, there's different ways to pronounce
00:42:24.540
Hebrew, you know, the Yemenite Jews, you could barely understand them. Obviously, there's the language
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00:42:30.740
of Yiddish. A Yemenite Jew and a Hasidic Jew are so different in so many ways. They really do. It's
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00:42:35.800
really hard to believe they're practicing the same religion. But ultimately, they aren't both committed
00:42:42.160
to the letter of the law. It's more the personal traditions and the, you know, the stuff that they've
00:42:48.940
kind of passed on through generations that kind of like flavor their observance. So you can't really
00:42:56.260
mess around with like the hardcore basics, you know, kosher is kosher, Shabbat is Shabbat.
00:43:02.100
But what you eat on Shabbat, and you know, the style of food that you like, and the tunes that you
00:43:07.440
sing, and the way you read the Torah, the accent that you have, those things definitely vary. But I
00:43:12.100
think that's what makes the Jewish people so interesting. We're so different. We're so unique.
00:43:15.640
We're so diverse. But we have the Torah in common.
00:43:18.980
Yeah, no, I love the different traditions from around the world. And I think it's so cool
00:43:23.080
that as the Jewish people, we can look at somebody who's practicing something that maybe doesn't look
00:43:27.680
so similar to what we do, and say, but you're still doing, you're still doing the right thing.
00:43:31.860
It's just a different version of it. So like, for example, on Passover, many Sephardim, Sephardic
1.00
00:43:38.320
Jews, people from like Spain, and, you know, generally, we they're darker skin Jews, they have rice,
00:43:46.200
and they have certain things that Ashkenaz Jews, kind of whiter European Jews, don't eat. And
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they're still they're both fine. It's just the tradition developed in a different way based on
00:43:56.760
where they where they were living and kind of what the people were doing around them.
00:44:01.640
Yeah, I'm married to a Sephardic Jew, and I eat rice on Passover and rice on Passover in my parents
00:44:07.000
house is like blasphemy, you know, but I'm sitting pretty here. I have my peanuts and my bamba and all
00:44:12.800
the things that are like, you know, so delicious that we were restricted Passover from and there's
00:44:19.360
nothing wrong with it. It's still as observant as the next Jew. So it's all good.
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00:44:23.120
It's amazing. I love it. Another question that I got is, I'm a reformed Jew, and I struggle with
00:44:30.600
being a conservative in a reform synagogue, as most of the people in my community are leftists. Do you
00:44:37.920
Oh, that's a good one. Okay, let me think for a second. All right. So first of all, you definitely
00:44:42.620
want, you want to, you want to unite. So you want to focus on your shared values, you know,
00:44:47.900
you do want to see what you do have in common, you know, identify and emphasize the common values
00:44:54.940
that you share with your synagogue, because that is your community. So you could find a space for
00:45:00.200
yourself in social justice and compassion and spirituality. So you definitely want to find the
00:45:04.820
things that you have in common. I would avoid all political discussion, honestly, like refrain from
00:45:09.880
engaging in political debates with people in your synagogue. That's not why you're there. You're
00:45:14.440
there to, to worship, not to discuss politics. Also, you know, the purpose of faith, or one of the
00:45:22.020
advantages of faith is that we have this community building. So when you participate, like, in all these
00:45:27.960
synagogue programs, or these church programs, you know, when you do charity work, or educational
00:45:33.100
programs, like cultural events, like those are the places that you build relationships with the people in
00:45:39.040
your community. So I would definitely suggest trying to get involved more like hands on. And, and, you
00:45:45.940
know, find support outside of your synagogue, you know, find people that align with you, your political
00:45:50.400
beliefs that are not involved in the synagogue, don't come into the show looking for someone to talk to
00:45:55.240
about politics, because you haven't had an opportunity all week. And then, you know, just remember that
00:46:00.500
we can always learn from other people, and we can stay grounded, and maintain our sense of,
00:46:07.560
you know, perspective, but be open minded and learn from, you know, we learn in ethics of our fathers,
00:46:14.140
like, who is wise, one who learns from, from all people. So, so take a minute, listen, maybe you
00:46:19.980
learn something. So funny. Yeah, no, I love that. And I will say, I have a slightly different perspective,
00:46:25.360
given that my husband grew up reform, you know, he has shared with me just how far left the reform
00:46:32.040
movement has gone. And I think the issue, you'll have to evaluate whether or not your practice of faith is
00:46:43.340
still aligned with the people you're practicing around. Because reform Judaism, in many ways, it does not
0.96
00:46:51.460
hold with traditional values with conservative values. And let's put it, I think people appreciate this reform
00:46:59.040
Judaism used to be progressive Judaism, and now it's Jewish progressivism. So if you really feel like Judaism
0.92
00:47:06.700
is your priority, then it is time to move out of reform. And I do feel, I'll say it straight out, like reform
00:47:12.200
does not have a space for people at this point, who are, who are observant, like that they're not focused on
00:47:18.940
the letter of the law. So if it's come to a point where you don't have relationship with the people in your
00:47:23.960
synagogue, and you're not really connecting, then maybe it is time to move on.
00:47:28.860
Yeah, exactly. And that's exactly what I was gonna say is that it may be time for you to evaluate
00:47:33.360
your practice of Judaism, what it means to you, what's important to you, and then start maybe trying
00:47:40.320
to attend a Chabad. That's usually my, my recommendation, my husband and I attended Chabad when
00:47:46.300
we were living around the country. And it was so wonderful to see so many different kinds of people
00:47:51.500
there. And so you never have to worry about feeling judged. It can just be a place for you to explore
00:47:56.340
becoming observant in a different way. And you will feel more welcomed there than perhaps where you
00:48:04.260
are now. Right. I agree. I totally agree. Yeah. So that is my advice for that. And I love your advice
00:48:10.660
too. So let's ask this question, which is, this is kind of a funny one. Do you have any advice for
00:48:18.000
making your husband feel appreciated during pregnancy? My husband has stepped up in so many
00:48:23.340
ways, and I just have no energy, but I want him to know how much I love and appreciate him.
00:48:28.320
Okay, well, first of all, say that you love and appreciate him. Don't underestimate the value and
00:48:33.500
actually say expressing the gratitude. Thank you, honey, for everything you do for me and the baby,
00:48:39.040
all the errands you're running, the cooking you're doing, just say the words, you know,
00:48:42.220
obviously communicate, have the conversation. He doesn't expect you to, you know, run around
00:48:49.020
looking for a present for him, or to go to the gym, because that's something that you used to do
00:48:53.100
together, like be realistic, make time for each other. And remember, like, when you are pregnant,
00:48:59.280
it is a very hard time for your spouse, because he knows that you're bonding with that baby. And
00:49:03.180
that's something that he's not having. So, you know, plan something special for him, make his favorite
00:49:07.780
meal, give him a massage or a movie night. I would, I have four kids, you know, yes, you feel
00:49:12.800
like crap by the time you're in your 37th week, but you have 37 weeks that you're, or let's say 20
0.52
00:49:19.160
of them that you're feeling pretty good. As a matter of fact, some women feel great. They feel sexier
0.98
00:49:23.680
than ever. So, and also like the small things, like involve, if your husband's a pet, my husband's not
00:49:29.460
the type of guy, like he doesn't want to go see the sonograms. He doesn't want to go to the doctor's
00:49:33.060
office. Like, just let me know when the baby's coming. But like, if your husband's that kind of guy,
00:49:37.120
you know, have him, have him come to the doctor's appointments with you, talk about the baby names,
00:49:41.980
decorate the nursery, do a little shopping. And yeah, ultimately, like a little text message,
00:49:47.200
like guys are so easy to please in that way. A little text message from a wife. I love you,
00:49:51.620
honey. I feel like a whale, but you make me feel like a queen. Like that, you know, just be real,
00:49:58.480
be nice. I love it. That's exactly right. I agree with everything you said. I think just being,
00:50:03.420
showing your love, showing that you respect him, showing that you appreciate him,
00:50:06.540
and just telling him that is really important. And then just, as you kind of mentioned, easy,
00:50:13.860
spent quality time. So like, you want to, you're feeling tired, you're feeling exhausted,
00:50:18.340
honey, I'm going to order in pizza tonight, and I want to watch a movie with you. And I don't want
00:50:21.680
to do anything else, but spend time with you. Or like, we're going to play a couple of board games,
00:50:26.600
and we're going to keep it simple. But I don't have to do a lot, because maybe I'm too tired to make
00:50:31.000
dinner tonight. But at least we're going to be spending time together. And I want you to know,
00:50:34.040
I'm putting you first for the next two or three hours, whatever it is, you can absolutely like
00:50:39.600
devote. I think I've talked about this before, but I won't get into it too much. But quality time
00:50:45.360
really is important. And it's not like it's a unique thing that is only one of the five love
00:50:50.360
languages. My feeling is quality time is the love language that all of the other love languages are
00:50:55.760
built on. So using quality time is like, the best way to show that you appreciate your husband.
00:51:01.900
So just saying, whatever it is, keep it simple. But I'm just going to be focused on you for now,
00:51:07.120
because I want you to know that I love you. And I'm so grateful for you. I think that's plenty,
00:51:12.000
and he'll really appreciate it. Yeah, so well said.
00:51:15.680
So I think that is it for today's episode of the Classically Abbey podcast. Thank you
00:51:20.360
so much for coming on. Tell us where we can find you.
00:51:24.280
I'm a fan of music, you can do a quick Google that's CH like Hanukkah,
1.00
00:51:28.240
the Weekly Squeeze podcast on Thursdays. I'm on Instagram. And yeah, I mean, my podcast is a
00:51:34.860
little different than yours. I don't speak specifically as on feminism, the way you do
0.85
00:51:39.840
on classical feminism, the way you do. It's more comedy, politics and religion. But I do I have
00:51:46.560
connected to you. So I do know that people like you, they were like me and vice versa. My audience
00:51:50.560
loved you. And it's always nice to make a connection with women around the world. And I am grateful that
00:51:55.320
you gave this opportunity. I love having my followers, first of all, get to know more
00:52:00.040
Orthodox Jewish creators. I think that's so important for people to see us in this public
00:52:04.260
space, because not many people know Orthodox Jews in person. So for them to see us know us know that
00:52:10.720
we're normal know that we have a lot of really interesting points of view, I think is great.
00:52:15.140
And on top of that, more women's not that I'm only for women, or you're only for women as far as
00:52:21.180
your podcast, but more women's spaces are just great to be a part of you get to be part of a
1.00
00:52:25.600
community that you really enjoy. And there's a different perspective in hearing from a woman
00:52:29.500
as opposed to somebody else. So I am really glad that I got to introduce you to my subscribers.
00:52:35.780
Thank you. Thank you. Yeah. So thank you so much for coming on. If you would like to subscribe,
00:52:40.740
make sure to follow me on YouTube, on Instagram, on Twitter, and you can follow this podcast wherever
00:52:46.240
you listen to podcasts. Thank you so much for listening. And I'll see you guys in my next episode.