The Glenn Beck Program - March 04, 2023


Ep 175 | Is THIS the Most DANGEROUS Man in Comedy? | Dave Landau | The Glenn Beck Podcast


Episode Stats

Length

1 hour and 12 minutes

Words per Minute

175.12823

Word Count

12,701

Sentence Count

1,202

Misogynist Sentences

17

Hate Speech Sentences

15


Summary

Comedian Steven Crowder joins me to talk about his new Netflix special, "A Prison Ten" and how he thinks about the end of the world. We also talk about the dangers of antibiotic shortage and how to prepare for it.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 Really, since the 1970s, you were a comedian that made it if you were on Saturday Night Live.
00:00:06.300 Today's guest is no exception.
00:00:09.400 These days, however, when he watches SNL, he doesn't recognize the show.
00:00:13.860 Nobody recognizes the show.
00:00:15.860 And he wouldn't make the roster because he's actually funny.
00:00:19.580 He is extraordinarily irreverent, to say the least.
00:00:24.420 The phrase comedian's comedian gets overused.
00:00:29.640 You know, Bill Hicks is a comedian's comedian.
00:00:33.060 It usually means that the comedian is too edgy or subversive for non-comedians to understand.
00:00:39.660 I'm not a comedian, but I understand him, and he is still comedian's comedian.
00:00:46.320 He is, it's brilliant writing, unbelievably offensive, but brilliant.
00:00:52.460 His latest special, A Prison Ten, is all the proof that you need on that.
00:00:59.200 This man does not care about any lines.
00:01:03.480 His comedy is so dark that you're kind of like, well, the apocalypse isn't so bad.
00:01:11.260 The world is ending, and there's nothing funny about it.
00:01:15.800 Well, until you watch his special, and then it's a little funny.
00:01:18.940 There's no telling how his jokes are going to end, you know, slip on a banana peel, and then end not on the street, but in the sewer.
00:01:29.860 He is a very different thinker and very funny comedian.
00:01:33.380 If you're a fan of Steven Crowder, you'll find this nice to reminisce with an old friend.
00:01:39.880 You will recognize him.
00:01:41.200 Please welcome Dave Landau.
00:01:44.700 Before we get into the comedy stuff, let me just tell you that with everything that's going on in the world, our relationship with China is not getting better.
00:01:56.480 And because of that, we're going to have some shortages.
00:01:59.720 According to a University of Minnesota study, the U.S. relies on our antibiotics.
00:02:06.380 18 out of the 21 antibiotics come from overseas.
00:02:11.160 72% of all pharmaceutical ingredients overseas.
00:02:17.440 That's not good.
00:02:18.680 That's not good.
00:02:19.760 That's actually really dangerous.
00:02:21.880 If things escalate between us and China, we could be looking at a severe antibiotic shortage.
00:02:27.200 I mean, you want to talk about going back to 1865, there it is.
00:02:32.860 This is why I highly recommend the Jace case from Jace Medical.
00:02:36.400 It's a great way to keep yourself prepared for the worst.
00:02:39.700 It is a pack of five different courses of antibiotics that you can use to treat a long list of bacterial illnesses,
00:02:45.920 UTIs, respiratory infections, sinusitis, skin infections, all kinds of stuff.
00:02:50.200 So whether you are an ultimate prepper, like I am, and you understand what could be right around the corner,
00:02:57.320 you get the Jace case.
00:02:58.420 Or if you're just somebody that travels and you're going on a vacation with your family,
00:03:02.560 don't get caught unprepared.
00:03:05.060 JaceMedical.com.
00:03:06.480 J-A-S-E Medical.com.
00:03:08.560 Enter the promo code BECCA at checkout and get a discount.
00:03:11.080 Your perception of me, do you think I would be a fan of your comedy or not?
00:03:29.000 Maybe the old you?
00:03:35.280 I'm such a fan.
00:03:36.740 I am such a fan.
00:03:37.900 But the good, wholesome, trying-to-be-better part of me hates me for it.
00:03:44.720 You know, I'm so conflicted.
00:03:46.940 Because you are, of which my humor has always been, very dark.
00:03:53.460 You are the darkest cavern I've ever experienced.
00:03:58.260 Thank you.
00:03:59.000 Your comedy is so dark.
00:04:02.540 You said, you were talking about, you know, end of the world and you brought up your son,
00:04:07.220 you know.
00:04:08.240 Do you remember?
00:04:09.320 Oh, yeah.
00:04:09.680 Yeah.
00:04:10.180 Could you just express this?
00:04:12.560 Yeah, where he just says, you know, Dad, you know what I want to be when I grow up.
00:04:15.940 And I said, it doesn't matter.
00:04:18.620 You know, just explaining to him how the world's going to end.
00:04:22.800 It's going to end.
00:04:23.280 It just doesn't.
00:04:24.100 Yeah.
00:04:24.340 Good night, son.
00:04:24.860 It just doesn't matter.
00:04:26.220 Yeah, he's seven.
00:04:27.100 Yeah.
00:04:27.200 It's like, he sees the day.
00:04:28.640 It's so funny.
00:04:32.960 Yeah.
00:04:33.700 And then, you know, what I, what the good part of me hates is that I just love all of
00:04:42.000 your humor and you are offensive in every possible way.
00:04:47.820 Thank you.
00:04:48.500 Yeah.
00:04:49.080 Yeah.
00:04:49.280 Yeah.
00:04:49.520 Cause I don't know why you do it.
00:04:51.280 No, but it is, you know, it is.
00:04:53.420 Yeah, of course.
00:04:54.040 Cause that's, I mean, that's, is that what you're striving for or?
00:04:59.460 You don't know.
00:05:00.680 That's the odd part.
00:05:01.560 Like I never want to look at, cause it's not necessarily that it's dirty.
00:05:04.840 It's more that it's filthy.
00:05:09.320 Graphically.
00:05:10.420 It's no, it's honest.
00:05:12.040 Yes.
00:05:12.360 And that's the way that I look at it is a lot of times.
00:05:14.520 Honesty is going to be that way.
00:05:16.720 So I don't necessarily go to be offensive.
00:05:18.840 I just go for the joke.
00:05:20.880 But in today's world, I mean, it is, there wasn't one.
00:05:27.980 Sometimes, sometimes the way you craft jokes, it's like, oh, that's going to piss off people.
00:05:34.580 Oh, here's another group of people.
00:05:36.060 That's going to piss off all in the same joke.
00:05:38.400 You'll have like three levels of people that are just want to set you on fire.
00:05:42.920 Yes.
00:05:44.720 What I like to do is I like to like the end of the joke with the tag.
00:05:47.820 Yes.
00:05:48.080 I like to find eight more things that are more offensive.
00:05:51.080 I know.
00:05:51.580 Make the beginning offensive part less offensive.
00:05:54.540 And that's what I enjoy is watching a crowd.
00:05:57.020 Oh my gosh.
00:05:57.740 Because you get an honest break though from people.
00:05:59.720 Right.
00:06:00.140 Because if they're cracking at something like that, you know that there's this, there's this
00:06:03.680 honest part of them that actually enjoys that.
00:06:06.500 Right.
00:06:06.980 Because there's so much we have to hide now in our society and like what we think is funny.
00:06:10.900 So bad.
00:06:11.500 Yeah.
00:06:11.840 Why not just say it?
00:06:13.060 Why not just have fun?
00:06:14.000 Because even when I.
00:06:15.400 But it's not.
00:06:15.800 I mean, the things you say are true, but some of the things are really offensive.
00:06:25.820 And it's not as true as it is.
00:06:28.860 I want to be able to laugh at that.
00:06:31.660 Yes.
00:06:31.860 You know, it's, it's clearly, at least I hope some of them are jokes, but it's clearly a joke.
00:06:38.940 But you, you give us permission to laugh and nobody is doing that.
00:06:45.460 At least, I mean, Chappelle does it, but.
00:06:48.980 I think you're a level down from, I mean, into the dark hole.
00:06:54.420 Yeah.
00:06:54.640 You're a level down.
00:06:56.000 You are more dangerous with your comedy than I think anybody else out there.
00:07:00.100 Thank you so much.
00:07:01.020 Honestly.
00:07:01.540 And I, I worked with Chappelle a few times when I, I started and he's one of my heroes.
00:07:06.080 You opened for him.
00:07:06.740 Yeah.
00:07:06.980 Yeah.
00:07:07.180 And this was when he was like, I opened for him for 7,000 people where it was, you know,
00:07:12.960 people were just going crazy, but they were all heckling.
00:07:15.260 It was at a time when he was supposedly going insane and then when, you know, when I remember
00:07:19.460 those days and then he walked right.
00:07:21.440 And then when he came back, it was amazing.
00:07:23.520 And it was, and now he, what was the difference when he, when he left?
00:07:27.360 Cause I remember this, he didn't, he signed to do a show and everybody thought he was crazy
00:07:31.760 because he, he left behind all that money and possible stardom.
00:07:35.860 And I remember thinking he is either crazy or I really like him because he knows the
00:07:43.020 price of his soul and he just sold out.
00:07:46.200 Yeah.
00:07:46.460 He, he always said to, he said his mom told him she made 30 grand a year as a teacher.
00:07:50.420 He said, if I can make that as a comic, I'm happy.
00:07:53.040 Everything else is icing on the cake.
00:07:54.640 Like, so when they offered him more money and more money to do things that he didn't
00:07:58.500 agree with and censor him, which was part of his contract to not do, he walked.
00:08:03.440 And then when he came back, he did exactly what he wanted to do.
00:08:06.860 And now he's oddly enough, a white supremacist and people attack him and try to stab him on
00:08:13.060 stage.
00:08:13.560 And it's like, he's only arguably one of the top five greatest comedians ever.
00:08:18.240 We try to take that.
00:08:19.400 Oh, it's amazing.
00:08:20.420 So he, yeah, he's such a hero to me, you know, and with the darkness, that's just my
00:08:25.080 life.
00:08:25.540 That's who I, I am.
00:08:27.820 So if I wasn't talking about something that is dark or I take a nugget of truth, like my
00:08:33.360 wife and I, or my, uh, my son and I, when we're sitting at our house pre COVID is one
00:08:37.360 of the jokes and he wants, I have to teach him about death because I take him to meet
00:08:41.560 my parents at the cemetery.
00:08:43.420 And you know, one of the lines is they still vote and you know, he gets to the cemetery and
00:08:48.000 I mean, he's like, Oh, you get him a goldfish.
00:08:50.360 That's how they learn about death.
00:08:51.880 You flush them.
00:08:52.600 So instead I get him a cat.
00:08:53.960 Oh my gosh.
00:08:54.600 You know?
00:08:54.780 And I'm like, you completely clogged up our toilet.
00:08:56.920 We're just sitting there, you know, like we have to tell you, it's just so perfectly
00:09:02.240 crafted.
00:09:03.060 Thank you.
00:09:03.660 And, uh, for somebody who is, I think a connoisseur of dark comedy, uh, there's just nobody better
00:09:13.840 at it than you.
00:09:14.820 That means the world.
00:09:15.700 Seriously.
00:09:15.980 Thank you.
00:09:16.540 Yeah, you're welcome.
00:09:17.700 Um, so do you know who Kurt Garan is?
00:09:21.180 I don't.
00:09:21.980 Okay.
00:09:22.280 You should.
00:09:23.000 Okay.
00:09:23.300 Um, he was, um, the biggest, most powerful star in the 1930s.
00:09:31.460 And, uh, he would go to, he was movie star, but he was also a comedian.
00:09:37.200 Um, he was kind of like Tom Hanks in, in, of his day, you know, or, uh, Will Ferrell.
00:09:44.640 You know, everybody loved him.
00:09:47.060 Uh, and he went into the cabarets and he started doing Nazi jokes from like 1928 to 1933.
00:09:56.460 Right.
00:09:57.500 He ended up, uh, a little edgy.
00:09:59.660 Yeah.
00:10:00.080 He ended up in a concentration camp, uh, and was killed.
00:10:04.580 It was a horrible, horrible, horrible story.
00:10:07.200 Um, but if things go poorly, if we don't turn around, good news, that could be you.
00:10:16.120 I know.
00:10:16.500 I'm excited for it.
00:10:17.700 I'm excited for the comedian camps.
00:10:19.960 Right.
00:10:21.580 We, I, are we getting further away from that?
00:10:25.500 Because I don't mean that literally, but all I mean, maybe, so, you know, we were going
00:10:31.180 maybe, but there was no one, there was, I kept saying, where's Lenny Bruce?
00:10:39.740 Is there not one Lenny Bruce that is willing to stand up to this?
00:10:46.240 No one, it seemed.
00:10:48.340 And now there is, it's, it's a Renaissance.
00:10:53.380 Yes.
00:10:54.060 When you have people in, you know, they've been on the show, you have Jim Brewer, you
00:10:57.480 have, uh, you have people that are willing to step up.
00:11:00.180 And I think it's not even so much to make a stand as much as it is.
00:11:05.920 Talk about the things that are going on.
00:11:08.040 And even when I talk about, for example, trans, I do it from a point of, I talk about me.
00:11:13.720 Like if I was to compete as a woman, uh, it would make no difference whatsoever.
00:11:18.160 And I'm able to point that out where I just talk about, you know, I'm at the end of the
00:11:22.280 swimming pool, my balls are hanging out.
00:11:24.280 They're like, who's this fat girl?
00:11:25.860 I think she has emphysema, no sports skills whatsoever.
00:11:29.760 You know, and there's a way to point out the, the lunacy of everything that's happening,
00:11:33.460 you know, without necessarily being antagonistic in the sense of you have to be offended.
00:11:39.420 I think in, in certain ways, because you're choosing to be, you're choosing to be a part
00:11:43.760 of something that is brainwashed to be offensive.
00:11:47.280 You know, the currency of today is to be offended.
00:11:50.560 The currency today is to be a victim.
00:11:53.140 It makes no sense to me at all.
00:11:54.540 It goes against what I think human nature is.
00:11:57.000 So eventually I think, yeah, we're going to have to either, either comics are going to
00:12:02.420 have to step up, start growing some balls and go back to being comics that are actually
00:12:06.960 doing what they're supposed to do, which is genuinely making people laugh with their own
00:12:12.620 beliefs and their own jokes.
00:12:14.240 And also, you know, artists, but I think comedians more so are the, usually the ones that bring
00:12:21.780 us into revolution.
00:12:23.260 And they're the ones who bring us out of the dark side because of that, you know what I
00:12:28.360 mean?
00:12:28.960 Um, because they, they poke at our conscious, you know, George Carlin was brilliant at that.
00:12:36.260 100% right out of Vietnam too.
00:12:38.080 Right.
00:12:38.900 And he, he made you think you'd laugh your ass off, but you'd go, well, maybe he's right
00:12:47.040 on that.
00:12:47.640 Maybe I should, you know, he had a message to him.
00:12:50.460 I hate messages, but he did it well.
00:12:53.760 He did it really well.
00:12:55.840 And there we went for a while where there was no one willing to stick their neck out.
00:13:03.140 But yeah, for a long time, well, and Carlin died in 08 and some of the stuff he said you
00:13:08.560 could do on stage right now and it would be just as important.
00:13:11.800 Oh yeah.
00:13:12.240 That's what's, that's what's so crazy about his last special.
00:13:15.200 And with Carlin, it, it wasn't so much about a message.
00:13:19.120 He just wasn't pandering to anybody.
00:13:21.360 Right.
00:13:21.660 So he was saying, this is what's wrong with everybody.
00:13:23.720 This is what's wrong with all humanity.
00:13:26.120 And this is the problem.
00:13:27.360 And he went out and he said at first, it's why prior is so well liked because he brought attention
00:13:32.580 to a group of people that weren't really being, you know, uh, shined on in any mainstream
00:13:38.620 light other than Cosby, who was very, very likable up until some incident, um, something
00:13:45.540 happened.
00:13:46.100 I watched that with my kids when they were younger and I felt so bad.
00:13:49.280 I kept watching it and going, when do I tell them when I found out that my wife was pregnant,
00:13:56.520 I bought the, I didn't buy it.
00:13:58.020 I used my dad's copy of fatherhood that he had had and I read it on the plane.
00:14:02.900 And then three days later I was like, Oh, that's, that's good.
00:14:06.920 Maybe I shouldn't take all the advice.
00:14:08.340 I'll never forget.
00:14:09.260 My kids, they'd watch Cosby, you know, for 10 years, we watched the whole thing.
00:14:14.260 And, uh, and, uh, you know, episode two, I've said to my wife, I'm not sure if this is a
00:14:20.080 good idea because at some point we have to tell them who he is.
00:14:23.800 And I remember after this, after all the episodes, I'm like, okay, this is a good way and a good
00:14:31.060 time to talk about, you may not, you may like someone's work, but the person, and they were
00:14:39.880 like, he did what?
00:14:42.380 Yeah.
00:14:42.820 Like he, he, he raped, uh, Bill Cosby.
00:14:47.940 Yeah.
00:14:48.240 Who?
00:14:48.660 But serial.
00:14:49.180 Everyone.
00:14:51.140 For like 30 years.
00:14:52.680 Yeah.
00:14:52.900 That was it.
00:14:53.760 I mean, it wasn't, it wasn't as, it was most of his career.
00:14:57.640 Uh, he's in jail, right?
00:15:00.160 Well, not now.
00:15:01.940 Oh, he was in there for a while.
00:15:03.480 No, they did take away his fake college degrees though.
00:15:07.400 That taught him.
00:15:08.380 That's what I loved about it.
00:15:09.840 Where they're like, we're taking your fake diplomas.
00:15:13.060 Oh, good.
00:15:14.000 That's, it's going to learn them.
00:15:16.000 Yeah.
00:15:17.480 Yeah.
00:15:17.920 It's hard because you watch himself and you go, it's arguably no matter what you say,
00:15:22.640 one of the greatest specials ever put on tape.
00:15:25.500 I mean, it just is.
00:15:26.540 And, but you wonder, is this a guy who's such a sociopath?
00:15:29.840 He nailed being a comic.
00:15:31.600 That's perfect.
00:15:33.000 At being this family friendly, you know,
00:15:35.840 no one would suspect.
00:15:37.160 Yeah.
00:15:37.320 There was no edge necessarily.
00:15:39.360 It wasn't that it was, there's no edge cause it was good,
00:15:41.420 but there was just this perfect,
00:15:44.660 like I'm catering to human beings in every way possible.
00:15:48.880 And I, no one's ever done that the way nobody has ever been as likable as a
00:15:53.540 comic as Bill Cosby, in my opinion.
00:15:55.560 So if you go by that, how many people have Jim Gaffigan raped?
00:16:00.000 I mean, oh, I mean, he kind of has, he has edge, but he's the same guy.
00:16:04.620 He's yeah.
00:16:04.860 Yeah.
00:16:05.100 Everybody kind of likes Jim Gaffigan.
00:16:06.500 Everybody loves him.
00:16:07.340 Right.
00:16:07.620 I just got a real problem with food.
00:16:12.420 Yeah.
00:16:12.780 That'd be weird if that came out.
00:16:14.340 Thank God he has like 50 kids.
00:16:16.100 I heard.
00:16:16.520 So maybe that's his wife.
00:16:19.220 He's getting it at home.
00:16:20.340 Yeah.
00:16:20.580 Yeah.
00:16:20.800 His wife's like, listen, you could be Cosby quickly.
00:16:23.680 Let's just, he's just putting on a mask and trying to get out to the BTK van.
00:16:27.040 And she's like, look, uh, back with Dave here in a second.
00:16:32.140 I, I was going to start this with, you know, you and I work hard for our money.
00:16:37.100 Um, and then I realized, no, this is what I do.
00:16:39.900 So you work hard for your money.
00:16:42.680 I am just faking it.
00:16:45.240 Anyway, I know, even though I don't really earn my money, uh, I have taken my hard earned
00:16:52.360 money and I use it, uh, the best way I can to help America, to help, um, to help build
00:17:03.060 the things that I think we need to build.
00:17:06.080 It's, it's not only a patriotic thing, it's a quality thing.
00:17:11.400 Traditionally, things that are made in America always been last longer, work better, set the
00:17:16.540 standard for the rest of the world.
00:17:18.080 Well, when it comes to clothing and things like that, you can't do that.
00:17:22.980 And any company that tries, it is an uphill battle.
00:17:26.980 And that's why grip six is a sponsor of mine.
00:17:30.100 That is a true American experience products that you can count on.
00:17:35.120 When you buy their socks, you're supporting American ranchers who raise specially bred sheep
00:17:40.560 here in America that produce the modern wool.
00:17:42.620 The American manufacturers who wash the wool, process it, and then weave it into socks that
00:17:48.340 will keep your feet warm in the winter and cool in the summer.
00:17:51.340 This is one of the American business owners that have, I mean, they have taken the hard
00:17:57.280 road to make it the best American made product with American labor out there.
00:18:03.220 Check out grip six today.
00:18:05.120 Grip six.
00:18:06.220 Go to grip six.com slash back today.
00:18:10.440 That's grip six.com slash back.
00:18:14.880 Five best comedians can be of all time or today.
00:18:21.540 I would say Dave Chappelle, uh, George Carlin, uh, Robert Schimmel.
00:18:28.300 Um, boy, that's tough.
00:18:34.440 Uh, there's so many Eddie Murphy.
00:18:39.040 What happened to him?
00:18:40.580 I think, I think what happened to Eddie Murphy was just, he was attacked so ruthlessly by
00:18:45.840 the press that you have to look at a guy who was so unbelievably talented, made some bombs
00:18:52.320 and they couldn't stand that he didn't live up to his own hype.
00:18:57.280 Like he was a 19 year old kid, 20 year old kid when he did Delirious.
00:19:00.940 People forget that.
00:19:02.140 So they were insanely unforgiving to him whenever he made something that wasn't good.
00:19:06.960 So, which ended up being a lot of things, but he still made some really good movies.
00:19:11.100 Oh, he made great movies.
00:19:12.360 And it was really funny.
00:19:13.820 Yeah.
00:19:14.100 And I remember when, like with, when he got nominated for the Oscar for Dreamgirls and
00:19:18.060 they said it was when he looked at the camera before he was about to shoot up the way that
00:19:21.620 he looked at the camera and he, during an interview and he's like, you know, I was in a movie where
00:19:26.020 I played nine people, you know, like he still had it where it's like, no, the talent was always
00:19:32.640 there, is always there.
00:19:34.460 Um, I think with him, they just cut him down in such a way because he was the first sort of
00:19:41.440 mega star to break at that very young age in the eighties in that comedy boom.
00:19:48.060 And you're, every movie you make is not going to live up to Beverly Hills cop and 48 hours.
00:19:53.260 And these are like masterpieces of comedy.
00:19:56.120 So you can't expect everything to work.
00:19:58.840 What does he do now?
00:20:00.220 I think he just does voiceovers in his basement and makes $40 million.
00:20:04.680 You know what I mean?
00:20:05.140 I don't think it's too bad.
00:20:06.420 No, I'm not saying that.
00:20:08.400 Does he want to exercise that muscle anymore?
00:20:11.300 He says that he does, but I can only imagine having been trashed the way that he, he has
00:20:16.760 been, why would you want to go out and go, okay, I have to make something that live up
00:20:20.860 to delirious and raw where you're, you know, 20 and 25 and now you're, he's got to be what
00:20:28.120 approaching 60, I would assume.
00:20:31.180 Yeah, but he should, I mean, Louis CK is still out there.
00:20:35.780 You want to be talking about trashed?
00:20:37.600 Oh yeah.
00:20:38.180 I mean, and Louis CK proved that it, and I was so glad he came back because, you know,
00:20:43.440 I'm going to put Louis in the top five as well.
00:20:46.160 I think he's phenomenal.
00:20:47.760 So I'm going to put him obviously in the top five as well.
00:20:50.960 And Patrice O'Neill, actually, if I, I don't know if I've named six.
00:20:54.900 Patrice O'Neill.
00:20:55.300 I don't think I've seen her.
00:20:56.880 Him.
00:20:57.560 Him.
00:20:57.920 Him.
00:20:58.180 Patrice O'Neill, big black dude.
00:20:59.880 Always a, always a male.
00:21:02.580 Oh, always a guy.
00:21:03.600 Old guy.
00:21:04.260 Patrice.
00:21:04.360 No, no, he passed a few years ago.
00:21:05.800 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:21:06.300 Always, always a dude.
00:21:07.880 He put out an album called Elephant in the Room, or a special.
00:21:12.220 One of the funniest specials ever where he's talking about a girl who went missing in Aruba.
00:21:17.840 And he's like, well, what's her name?
00:21:18.920 And the whole audience goes, Natalie Holloway.
00:21:21.020 He goes, right, right.
00:21:21.660 And he goes, and the other girl he killed, the Hispanic girl, nobody says anything.
00:21:28.200 He goes, yeah, exactly.
00:21:28.980 No one cares.
00:21:29.780 They just sent some guy out to the end of a pier to be like, yeah, wait a minute, I'll see her.
00:21:36.300 But it's like, he did this, it was, it was one of the most, it's one of the best specials I've ever seen.
00:21:42.160 It's perfect, it's offensive, it's great, it's like, and he was somebody who took a risk every time he was on, on Mike.
00:21:49.360 I think one of the best comedy writers and comedians, and I'm surprised he wasn't on your list, is Ricky Gervais.
00:21:56.580 Oh, Gervais for sure.
00:21:57.740 I mean, that's why it's so tough to, and Gervais has heart too, in a way, especially with his show that he put out recently.
00:22:04.720 And the way that his, yeah, 100%.
00:22:06.580 Have you seen, what is it, the BBC series that he did, Derek, I think?
00:22:12.720 Have you ever watched that?
00:22:13.720 I haven't seen Derek, no.
00:22:15.420 You should watch it.
00:22:16.360 I'll watch it, though, for sure.
00:22:17.540 First of all, it's very dark, but it's about a guy, he plays a handicapped guy, and he has to live in a nursing home with a bunch of old people.
00:22:25.520 And there's this one character that is so offensive, so offensive, that it's hard to watch, and he doesn't fit.
00:22:37.580 You know, it's just all of a sudden, everything's gonna, and then this guy comes in so offensive.
00:22:41.840 But you watch the arc.
00:22:44.080 I mean, he's brilliant with heart.
00:22:46.920 He is just brilliant.
00:22:48.480 He's like a, Hughes, what was his name?
00:22:52.760 He made the comedian, he made a bunch of stuff with John Candy, the director and writer.
00:23:00.160 Oh, not Harold Ramis.
00:23:02.460 No, no, no.
00:23:03.700 Oh, John Hughes.
00:23:04.660 John Hughes.
00:23:05.240 See, that's what's missing today.
00:23:07.060 John Candy's one of my all-time favorites.
00:23:08.560 It's not a stand-up.
00:23:09.620 And I think John Hughes is missing because Uncle Buck, Trains, Planes, and Automobiles.
00:23:13.560 These are movies, yeah, they don't make those anymore.
00:23:15.660 I've been saying it forever, where you just, you love the character.
00:23:19.200 There's this schlub, there's a reason these people exist.
00:23:22.180 You don't, there's no heart anymore to anything like that.
00:23:26.140 I think that's, you know.
00:23:28.160 But no, but Gervais, his last one about the one where his wife dies, and he's completely, you know, he just hates everyone as a result of it.
00:23:36.620 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:23:37.580 And there's.
00:23:38.520 What is it?
00:23:39.560 I forget the name of it.
00:23:41.000 Afterlife.
00:23:41.480 Afterlife.
00:23:41.980 Yeah.
00:23:42.160 It's brilliant.
00:23:42.760 Brilliant.
00:23:43.060 Brilliant.
00:23:43.400 And you see him turn around at the end, and there's so much heart there.
00:23:47.300 Yeah.
00:23:47.520 And that's what I love about Gervais.
00:23:49.300 Me too.
00:23:49.640 Is that's the underlining thing.
00:23:51.360 There's always this theme.
00:23:52.720 And so, you know, Red Skelton.
00:23:55.360 Yes.
00:23:55.740 So Red Skelton said, you can go see a clown at the circus, and you will just remember you saw a bunch of clowns at the circus.
00:24:05.360 Yeah.
00:24:05.640 But the clown that can make you laugh and cry, you will never forget.
00:24:09.460 Yep.
00:24:09.620 And that's Ricky Gervais.
00:24:11.660 I mean, he's brilliant.
00:24:13.860 So.
00:24:14.400 Did you ever see Life's Too Short?
00:24:17.740 No.
00:24:18.340 I don't think so.
00:24:18.780 It was a show he made with Warwick Davis, who played, like, Leprechaun, and he was in Willow.
00:24:24.560 And they just, they just hate him.
00:24:28.100 So they do stuff like they make the door on their office.
00:24:30.860 They put the knob a little bit too high, so he can't get in.
00:24:34.300 It's just, it's just, it's like deliberately cheap, but it's so funny because Warwick is willing to take.
00:24:39.740 What's it called again?
00:24:40.940 Life's Too Short.
00:24:41.720 Life's Too Short.
00:24:42.400 I gotta look that up.
00:24:42.980 It's brilliant.
00:24:43.780 In one episode, he's being trolled by this kid constantly on MySpace, attacking him for being a dwarf.
00:24:50.020 So he finds him, goes to the school, walks into the classroom, and just starts ripping this kid apart where everybody's laughing.
00:24:56.960 And then it cuts back to the kid, and he's just in a wheelchair with a blow straw.
00:25:00.920 And then he realizes he starts feeling bad, so at the end he's like, well, you know, I just felt he kind of deserved it.
00:25:08.100 And, like, behind him, it's just the kid in the blow chair with, like, kick me on the back of it.
00:25:12.620 Kids are chucking backpacks at him.
00:25:14.820 And it's just like this.
00:25:16.320 It was so funny.
00:25:18.020 And, like, only, like, Gervais and somebody with enough vulnerability like Warwick Davis could have pulled it off.
00:25:23.600 Yeah.
00:25:26.560 You, I have a very dark sense of humor, but I know where that came from.
00:25:35.600 Gervais has a very dark sense of humor.
00:25:38.580 You're one of the darker ones I've seen.
00:25:42.840 Where does that come from with you?
00:25:46.920 A lot of places.
00:25:48.520 I grew up in, I grew up in Grosse Pointe Woods, which bordered Detroit.
00:25:52.180 Okay, that's enough.
00:25:52.860 Yeah, right there.
00:25:53.900 Right off 8 Mile.
00:25:55.120 You saw a lot of stuff.
00:25:56.860 My dad was, well, my mom was kind of like a bipolar nurse.
00:26:00.940 And my dad.
00:26:01.440 A nurse for people with bipolar?
00:26:02.880 No, no, no.
00:26:03.320 Or she had bipolar.
00:26:04.300 She was a great nurse.
00:26:05.460 She just wasn't good at treating her own bipolar.
00:26:07.760 Oh, okay.
00:26:08.320 Yeah.
00:26:08.900 And my dad got Agent Orange in Vietnam.
00:26:11.880 And they, he ended up with a brain tumor.
00:26:15.680 And the government was very kind.
00:26:17.700 They gave us absolutely nothing.
00:26:19.500 And they didn't, they didn't address it at all.
00:26:21.720 And his insurance company was like.
00:26:23.980 I know this sounds bad, but I kind of wish we'd returned to those days on a lot of fronts
00:26:28.160 with the government where they did nothing for you.
00:26:31.740 Anyway.
00:26:32.680 Yeah, they just, well, they didn't help at all.
00:26:34.860 Yeah.
00:26:35.120 Yeah.
00:26:35.220 The insurance company as well was like, sure, you've been paying us, but maybe you've had
00:26:40.480 it forever.
00:26:41.680 So he ended up having to pay out of pocket.
00:26:44.440 My dad was my hero.
00:26:46.680 He ran Babe Ruth Little League for everybody.
00:26:49.380 He was everybody's coach.
00:26:50.600 He was, and he got sick when I was about 14.
00:26:53.960 He ended up passing away, which then led to my mom's suicide.
00:26:56.800 And that, uh, that's where mine came from.
00:27:00.020 So we have a very, a lot in common.
00:27:02.000 Yeah.
00:27:02.800 Your mom as well.
00:27:04.140 Yeah.
00:27:04.320 When I was 14 or 15.
00:27:06.300 Yeah.
00:27:06.380 I'm very sorry to hear that.
00:27:07.560 Yeah.
00:27:07.680 I was a little older.
00:27:08.540 My mom did, but my dad died when I was a teenager.
00:27:10.960 Yeah.
00:27:11.660 Bad.
00:27:12.460 Yeah.
00:27:12.680 I was, I was on stage a couple of days ago and a kid in the crowd said he had been in
00:27:17.140 the back of a police car.
00:27:18.280 I said, why?
00:27:18.840 He said, well, my girlfriend's mom killed herself.
00:27:20.800 I was like, all right, she dug myself quite a hole, probably not as deep as the one they
00:27:26.000 dug for her.
00:27:27.500 And then I said, don't worry, my mom, I said, my mom, my mom killed herself, uh, as well.
00:27:32.960 Don't worry about it.
00:27:33.720 But it was right after we had our kid and she would be like, could I babysit?
00:27:37.860 And I'd be like, I don't know, mom.
00:27:39.120 Cause if you get depressed like an hour in, you're going to have to at least hang yourself
00:27:43.420 from the ceiling fan.
00:27:44.440 So he's got a mobile to look at.
00:27:45.920 And it's the only way that I could justify like the, right.
00:27:50.700 Cause I loved my mom.
00:27:52.240 Right.
00:27:52.620 I just, she, she lost her mind after my dad passed and because she was older, she worked
00:27:59.360 as a candy striper and then became a nurse and then she'd work in mental wards.
00:28:04.440 And as a result of that, she never got help and she knew how to, she would attempt suicide
00:28:09.700 and then talk her way out of it like that.
00:28:12.200 Cause she knew what to say.
00:28:13.660 Right.
00:28:14.000 She was smarter than them.
00:28:15.400 So she would just say whatever and they'd go, well, yeah, you shouldn't be here.
00:28:18.860 Obviously you clearly drank a bottle of Vicodin on accident to go home.
00:28:23.520 Right.
00:28:23.740 You know?
00:28:24.120 And so my dad would go around the country trying to pay out of pocket.
00:28:30.580 So my dad who went from nothing when we were born to a millionaire, lost everything.
00:28:35.820 And I ended up being raised by my aunt, my, my, or my aunt, various aunts.
00:28:41.920 My, the woman who was watching us was a very close family friend.
00:28:45.580 She ended up killing herself.
00:28:47.620 Did you ever start to think maybe?
00:28:49.400 I thought maybe it's me.
00:28:50.240 Yeah.
00:28:50.700 I'm going, am I the common denominator?
00:28:52.520 Do I snore?
00:28:52.980 A lot of people killing themselves around me.
00:28:54.820 I just sort of, yeah, she had been, she had been stealing pills from, uh, work.
00:29:00.600 She was an ER nurse and that she got caught.
00:29:03.620 And one day she didn't come home and I'm like, this is weird.
00:29:06.440 And then she didn't come home again.
00:29:07.880 But because I was now a teenage drug addict, I was like, well, I'm not going to ask any questions.
00:29:12.580 I'm just going to throw parties.
00:29:14.240 And then when I went to her house to check, she had, you know, she had, uh, swallowed a
00:29:18.760 handful, died in her bathtub.
00:29:20.100 And then I was watched by other aunts and stuff.
00:29:22.740 And I remember it cause she got very mad when she found out that I had smoked pot.
00:29:28.040 Very angry.
00:29:28.800 And I was like, this is weird.
00:29:30.140 She lets me smoke cigarettes and shoot pool and like what, you know, but she got nuts at me.
00:29:35.380 And I realized it was a projection of her own addiction.
00:29:38.880 So after that, uh, I just kind of, I didn't go to, I gave up on going to school.
00:29:44.620 I didn't really have any ambition other than possibly going to second city to do comedy,
00:29:49.280 but I didn't really believe in much.
00:29:51.940 And I was arrested 13 times over the course of, from what age to what age I was arrested
00:29:57.340 mostly from 16 to 20 and then once at 27.
00:30:02.660 And that's when my sobriety started and jail time, uh, just jail, not prison.
00:30:11.120 So just, yeah, I'm not some good for you.
00:30:13.480 I didn't break federal laws.
00:30:17.020 I mean, come on.
00:30:17.860 It was just some theft and four DUIs passing out at a red light in a toga.
00:30:24.020 Uh, yeah, I thought it was a stops in it, right?
00:30:26.560 You know, I thought it was a stop sign.
00:30:28.120 I thought it was a red light.
00:30:29.600 I was like this thing.
00:30:30.960 Oh, that was a bad day.
00:30:32.740 So I was waiting at a stop sign and I thought it was a red.
00:30:37.680 So I started snorting ketamine off of a roadmap, you know, an animal tranquilizer, you know,
00:30:43.260 to wake me up.
00:30:43.940 And I, I passed out and, uh, and who hasn't done that with their road now?
00:30:48.860 Clearly it's what they were for.
00:30:50.300 Kids are not kids today.
00:30:52.240 Where do they do their ketamine?
00:30:53.880 You know, right off their phone.
00:30:55.680 That's why it's so amazing that it's for depression.
00:30:57.720 Now I'm like, what do you think I was doing it for?
00:31:00.860 I could have told you that in 98.
00:31:02.720 So like, I, uh, I ended up, uh, getting woken up by the police and they're like, what are
00:31:10.980 you doing?
00:31:11.460 And I said, my, my car stalled.
00:31:13.360 And they said, it's running.
00:31:15.360 And I said, it must've restarted.
00:31:17.760 And then they arrested me and they walked me into the jail because it turned out I was
00:31:22.160 in front of the police station.
00:31:24.000 So it was these different things where I would get, and then a whippets was another one where,
00:31:29.580 uh, nitrous was very popular in the nineties in Detroit.
00:31:34.320 And in the late nineties, I went to probably like 2000.
00:31:38.040 I went to a store in Detroit and I was trying to buy like 30 cans of whipped cream in like
00:31:43.240 mid August.
00:31:44.340 And the guy's like, what are you going to use these for?
00:31:46.360 I'm like, uh, ice cream social.
00:31:48.600 And mind you, I'm wearing like a full track suit.
00:31:51.360 I have a sideways hat and chains.
00:31:53.860 And the guy's just taking them behind the counter.
00:31:57.040 He's like, I'm not selling you these.
00:31:58.340 I'm like, yeah, you are.
00:31:59.580 He's like, no, I'm not.
00:32:00.640 So I'm like trying to reach for him.
00:32:01.960 He's like, I'm going to call the cops.
00:32:03.700 Like, okay.
00:32:04.800 So I, I walk outside and I started giving them the finger and there were these two leaders
00:32:09.360 and I just started filling my car with the two leaders.
00:32:12.200 Like these are mine now I'm hammered.
00:32:14.660 And then I noticed a cop and I'm like, oh, so I start waving to the guy all politely.
00:32:19.960 Like, thank you for all the two leaders, sir.
00:32:22.140 And I get in and I strive away.
00:32:23.940 I get pulled over a few minutes later to the day I got my license.
00:32:27.660 I got a DUI the day I got in a high speed chase and crashed my car into a tree on the
00:32:34.260 day.
00:32:34.940 The day I got my license.
00:32:36.060 Yeah.
00:32:36.240 My dad let me borrow his car and he regretted it.
00:32:39.840 Yeah.
00:32:40.200 And it was a little bit after you just got diagnosed.
00:32:43.180 So you can tell that.
00:32:44.680 So you hadn't proven yourself to be.
00:32:47.420 Not yet.
00:32:48.040 A complete moron.
00:32:49.120 No, not yet.
00:32:49.800 No, no, no.
00:32:50.640 He, he was worried.
00:32:51.820 But my dad, fortunately at that time, I shouldn't say fortunately, but I think his brain hadn't
00:32:58.400 been going yet.
00:32:59.300 And my dad was very funny.
00:33:00.480 He was like danger field.
00:33:01.460 Like he would really make jokes about anything, really had a great sense of humor and was
00:33:06.280 tough as nails.
00:33:07.040 I mean, he had a halo in drilled to his head for a year and a half and he would go golfing
00:33:11.900 and he didn't take painkillers.
00:33:14.060 It was crazy.
00:33:15.120 But he, the day he loaned me the car is when he started to worry about me because I'd never
00:33:21.400 been arrested before.
00:33:22.460 I was 16 and I got in a high speed chase because I was giving people lawn jobs going under their
00:33:28.920 lawn, you know, ripping it up, you know, and I decided to do it in front of a guy who
00:33:34.820 was sitting in a BMW and I had a Buick Regal.
00:33:38.120 And so we ended up in this high speed chase and we were having a family reunion at the
00:33:42.520 time.
00:33:43.380 So I smashed into a tree.
00:33:45.440 Now, all my friends who were still conscious run.
00:33:49.800 I'm unconscious by the airbag.
00:33:52.160 So it's just me.
00:33:53.660 And what I didn't know, even though he had gone down to the hood to get liquor, was the
00:33:57.600 trunk was filled with a bunch of party supplies for the party the next day.
00:34:02.200 So the trunk pops open and for like a half a mile is potato chips and beer and liquor just
00:34:10.600 leading to me unconscious in a car.
00:34:15.240 And then I wake up and I see my dad and I walk out and my dad's never been violent to
00:34:20.360 me.
00:34:21.260 And I walk out and I go, dad, don't worry.
00:34:23.040 I'm okay.
00:34:23.680 And he just hit me in the face and knocked me out the second time that evening.
00:34:29.340 And then I get woken.
00:34:30.700 I finally wake up and the cop seriously goes, he's awake.
00:34:34.740 If you want to hit him again, completely on my day.
00:34:38.840 You know, they knew exactly what had happened.
00:34:41.400 Six months suspended license though, at that time, kind of a slap on the wrist, different
00:34:46.020 time.
00:34:46.540 And then from then on, the more my dad was gone, the more my family was gone.
00:34:52.100 I just, I had abandonment issues, which was not their fault, but I was just kind of lost.
00:34:58.560 I had, you know, I just sort of went to a very...
00:35:01.400 You're saying family's important?
00:35:02.860 Yeah, it's weird.
00:35:03.640 Yeah.
00:35:03.880 You know, it's, it's almost like you need them.
00:35:05.680 Right.
00:35:06.220 And yeah, so I was being raised by my friends who could stay out all night.
00:35:11.080 And a lot of them, the ones who could stay out all night, were dealing with certain issues
00:35:15.540 at home.
00:35:16.200 And the ones that had good home lives were going home.
00:35:19.340 And I ended up addicted to drugs and alcohol for years.
00:35:23.800 How far down that rabbit hole did you go?
00:35:25.580 Very, very, very.
00:35:27.100 I mean, 13 arrests and I was a...
00:35:29.880 If I didn't drink, and this was by the time I was a senior in high school, I remember I
00:35:34.640 went to eat rice at Eastland Mall in Detroit at a food court.
00:35:41.780 And when I went to eat the rice, my hand was shaking so bad from withdrawals.
00:35:45.900 It was like going everywhere.
00:35:48.060 And my friend Stu's like, do you have Parkinson's?
00:35:50.540 He's just like ripping on me.
00:35:51.760 And I'm like, I got to go to the bathroom.
00:35:53.460 And I drove down the street, grabbed some liquor from the liquor store, and I just slammed
00:35:59.760 it to drive back so I could sit down and finish eating my food.
00:36:03.980 Wow.
00:36:04.100 And that was the moment I'm like, I realized I was a severe alcoholic.
00:36:08.460 And then when I finally ended up in rehab and felt what it was like to detox, I knew
00:36:14.000 that I had some serious problems.
00:36:16.300 So you were really just addicted to alcohol?
00:36:21.540 Alcohol is my main thing, but I did...
00:36:24.180 I mean, I was a dry-souled weed.
00:36:25.680 I did everything.
00:36:26.720 But alcohol is my main thing, eventually cocaine, because I wanted to stay up to drink.
00:36:33.180 Correct.
00:36:33.440 And LSD was everywhere.
00:36:36.040 I mean, I did...
00:36:37.400 We ballpark at like 350, 400 hits.
00:36:40.500 Jeez.
00:36:41.200 Yeah.
00:36:41.900 What do you think of this new trend where LSD is cool again and it's good for you?
00:36:47.100 I don't believe it.
00:36:49.140 I mean, if there is some sort of idea to microdosing with mushrooms that actually cures depression
00:36:55.320 and there's people that believe it and can prove it, I'd be interested in truthfully seeing
00:36:59.720 it.
00:37:00.140 I'd like to see the facts.
00:37:01.400 LSD because of where it comes from and the way that it was made and the way that it's
00:37:07.680 sort of a mind control, I don't think it was good for me.
00:37:13.500 Because I have a thing called HPPD and I still get the occasional, you know, something will
00:37:20.040 move.
00:37:20.460 I don't understand things.
00:37:21.620 I have a concept of time that's not necessarily...
00:37:24.620 Really?
00:37:25.000 Oh, yeah.
00:37:25.560 There's like a division of like when I started doing hallucinogens versus when I didn't and
00:37:31.440 I have like two separate lives and I didn't know that.
00:37:35.020 Yeah.
00:37:35.480 I didn't know that until my doctors, you know, diagnosed me with it.
00:37:41.680 So I just wouldn't do it.
00:37:43.560 You know, I've had friends who are like 40 now who are like, I think I want to try acid
00:37:48.020 and I'm like, at 40?
00:37:50.160 Like when you're 16, you don't have to worry about anything.
00:37:52.540 See, I have the different advice.
00:37:54.100 I became an alcoholic and now as an adult with teenagers, I need those blackouts.
00:38:02.820 I wasted them on nothing.
00:38:06.820 Oh, I'm not saying I don't miss a good one.
00:38:09.420 Don't piss those away, man.
00:38:10.860 You only have so many of those.
00:38:11.960 Yeah, I can still get a hangover though.
00:38:13.380 I just have to eat ice cream and then wake up the next day and I feel like I've been doing
00:38:17.100 egg stands all night.
00:38:18.840 It's wonderful.
00:38:19.660 So yeah, I guess, you know, really though, I guess how it went was just different dark
00:38:25.440 things happen in my life and making jokes with my friends.
00:38:28.480 It's how I just dealt with it.
00:38:32.140 Sitting here talking to another alcoholic and who had similar life growing up.
00:38:39.780 Uh, I know the danger of, um, drugs eat no matter how much pain you're in, uh, man, drugs can
00:38:49.600 be very, very dangerous.
00:38:51.200 So how do you kill a constant nagging pain without blowing holes through your stomach or being
00:38:57.720 addicted to something?
00:38:58.600 I have found relief factor.
00:39:00.840 And once I began taking it, almost all of my pain, well, all of my pain did go away almost
00:39:07.680 all of the time.
00:39:08.800 I still have flashes of it, but I, I, I wasn't able to use my hands or anything.
00:39:14.280 Um, most of the time it was awful.
00:39:17.280 Please give relief factor a shot.
00:39:19.480 Try it.
00:39:19.980 Relief factor, not a drug.
00:39:21.300 So it's not going to whack you out.
00:39:23.400 Relief factor.com three week.
00:39:25.120 Quick start is 1995.
00:39:27.400 It's a trial pack.
00:39:28.740 Do it now.
00:39:29.380 Relief factor.com or 800, the number four relief.
00:39:35.760 A lot of people know you as, you know, the cohost with Steven Crowder.
00:39:40.400 Yes.
00:39:41.460 You, you still talk to him cause he's fallen off the map and yeah, the, uh, he, well,
00:39:47.220 he had the issue with the daily wire.
00:39:49.200 Uh, that was very public.
00:39:51.020 Um, I believe he's coming back though.
00:39:53.020 You do.
00:39:53.540 Yeah.
00:39:54.280 Good.
00:39:54.980 We miss him.
00:39:55.660 Yeah.
00:39:56.100 I know a lot.
00:39:56.600 He's very funny.
00:39:57.400 A lot.
00:39:57.820 Yeah.
00:39:57.980 A lot of people really want him back.
00:39:59.620 Yeah.
00:40:01.200 Um, uh, when you look at, um, people who are doing comedy, let's say Saturday night live
00:40:12.380 and you see the people that are on there now, do you think they know they've sold out that
00:40:20.140 they're, they're, they're, they're shills or are they just, have they just finally just hired
00:40:25.560 a bunch of people who are really not funny, just not, you know, it used to be, everybody
00:40:31.020 was really funny.
00:40:32.060 They just didn't know how to finish it.
00:40:33.820 Now it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's the ending of every scene is the whole
00:40:39.040 scene.
00:40:39.800 Yeah.
00:40:40.100 I agree.
00:40:40.580 It feels like it's written by the CIA every time you want, doesn't it?
00:40:43.740 It does.
00:40:44.160 It really is uncomfortable.
00:40:45.620 Yeah.
00:40:45.780 And then you see update and I kind of go, okay, they're comics.
00:40:49.340 I do think they are, you know, I think Colin Jost knows what he's doing.
00:40:52.820 You know, I think, but the rest of the show, it just feels like it's a forced thing.
00:40:57.280 It's like, I used to like Colbert.
00:40:59.600 Mm.
00:41:00.060 And then once you saw the dancing vax needles, I was like, why would you allow that ever?
00:41:05.720 Can you imagine even Johnny Carson coming out there or even Leno?
00:41:10.300 Anybody?
00:41:10.940 Nobody would have done it.
00:41:11.740 It's insane.
00:41:12.580 Nobody.
00:41:12.760 That's it.
00:41:13.280 That's an agenda.
00:41:14.180 It's propaganda.
00:41:15.420 And it's, and you've, you've, you've also, it's not that, that is, that screams propaganda.
00:41:22.760 It was so terrifying in a way to see those dancing needles.
00:41:27.580 Um, uh, but it's like people just write off half the country now.
00:41:32.980 Yes.
00:41:33.600 Where Carson would have never done that.
00:41:35.820 No, never done that.
00:41:37.300 It was for everybody to enjoy.
00:41:39.160 Yeah.
00:41:39.460 And that's the part where if you don't enjoy something on, on accident or because by default
00:41:45.920 you're offended or you don't like it, that's fine.
00:41:47.980 I mean, comedy is not for everybody.
00:41:49.620 Not everybody's going to like you, but now it's deliberate division and that's what they
00:41:54.700 want.
00:41:55.140 Yeah.
00:41:55.460 And that's what the, it's what the entire mainstream outlets are.
00:41:58.300 It's to make a group of people hate another group of people.
00:42:02.260 And unfortunately everything in the mainstream is designed to make you detest.
00:42:08.820 It's not even just right.
00:42:10.620 It's anything outside of their dogma.
00:42:13.900 Yes.
00:42:14.420 It's a religion.
00:42:15.440 Yeah, for sure.
00:42:16.280 I'd say it's, it's extreme.
00:42:18.480 It's hard to even call it left at this point because people can look at liberal and I can
00:42:24.300 look at liberal and go, well, I'd say I was liberal.
00:42:26.400 I don't, that's why I don't call it liberal anymore.
00:42:29.880 I don't, I'm uncomfortable calling it Democrats.
00:42:32.820 Yeah.
00:42:32.980 There are Democrats that I know that vote Democrat.
00:42:35.400 Right.
00:42:35.840 And they don't buy into all this crap.
00:42:37.620 They're strangely not standing up against it.
00:42:41.060 But that's different.
00:42:43.220 There is, the power is in the uber dangerous left.
00:42:49.320 Absolutely.
00:42:50.280 And that's why it's where they land.
00:42:52.680 But we're at a point now where people are doing things to be liked, but what they're
00:42:58.320 doing is extreme.
00:43:00.500 And what they're doing is, is it's violent, it's wrong, and it's very much to be liked.
00:43:06.320 And we're living in a thing where outrage is currency.
00:43:09.340 So why?
00:43:10.840 Why is that something you want to be a part of?
00:43:13.140 And it's not even, you know, it comes down to, we have arguments of people use trans or
00:43:19.540 they use this or they use that.
00:43:20.800 And they want to use victimhood and they want to use everything else or be a part of this.
00:43:24.820 I don't feel that this is how everybody feels.
00:43:27.780 I don't feel that there should be this constant training of division to make you feel like
00:43:33.200 you're nothing.
00:43:34.240 Yeah.
00:43:34.620 And that's what it is.
00:43:35.440 It's evil.
00:43:36.020 It is.
00:43:36.700 It is.
00:43:38.480 I've talked to several people and many of them atheists or agnostic.
00:43:43.800 I'm like, you know, this is a very religious word, but I don't know how to describe telling
00:43:49.820 people you are nothing.
00:43:53.180 You will never be anything unless you get them.
00:43:56.800 Yep.
00:43:57.360 That's, that's just evil.
00:43:59.380 Well, and to blame somebody else.
00:44:01.100 That's the idea.
00:44:02.220 You're never going to be anything because of that guy.
00:44:05.180 Why would you believe that?
00:44:06.840 And then you have an entire institution.
00:44:08.400 You have college, all that higher learning.
00:44:10.620 And the idea is you go there and a professor teaches you that you can never amount to anything
00:44:15.420 because you were born into a color.
00:44:17.300 And then this other color has everything, but doesn't deserve it.
00:44:20.980 And this has to somehow be switched.
00:44:23.900 So you're being trained that you should never be anything because you can't be.
00:44:28.040 Unless you take it.
00:44:28.880 Right.
00:44:29.260 And the other part is being taught that they are worthless and that they need to check
00:44:33.320 themselves in every way possible.
00:44:35.300 And I have a son.
00:44:36.140 It's like, I don't buy into that.
00:44:38.580 How old is he?
00:44:39.800 He's going to be eight this weekend.
00:44:43.700 So I'm judging by the way the world's going.
00:44:46.020 It's going to be a good last birthday.
00:44:48.620 Good last year.
00:44:49.700 You have to be.
00:44:52.180 I mean, I have teenagers.
00:44:53.900 I'm terrified for the world.
00:44:55.160 And they have gone to the age where they have asked me, so, dad, I know you're really
00:45:03.580 pessimistic.
00:45:06.320 What's my life going to be like?
00:45:08.920 And the honest answer is, I don't know.
00:45:13.300 It could be really great.
00:45:15.320 It could be really bad.
00:45:16.360 But I grew up in a time that was a blip in human history.
00:45:21.840 It's always been that, you know?
00:45:24.180 Yes.
00:45:24.620 But do you think the American age is over?
00:45:29.440 I think social media ruined it.
00:45:36.000 I think because I think technology ruined it.
00:45:39.340 I think technology evolved a lot quicker than people did.
00:45:42.180 Oh, yeah.
00:45:43.060 And I think that's the dangerous part is I do believe in freedom of speech and that everybody
00:45:47.420 should have a voice.
00:45:48.420 When did we stop saying, I so strongly disagree with you, but I'll fight to my last breath
00:45:52.960 for you to be able to say it.
00:45:55.160 Right.
00:45:55.660 And the problem is, is I've learned, though, that a lot of the people on social media maybe
00:46:02.180 shouldn't talk.
00:46:03.180 I've always thought of it as we've all we know these people were around us.
00:46:11.320 Yes.
00:46:11.440 I mean, we always had the guy on the street or the family on the street that everybody
00:46:17.000 else on the street would go.
00:46:18.140 Kids, do not play.
00:46:19.920 Don't just don't go over there.
00:46:21.280 Just don't go over there.
00:46:22.120 If they're talking to you, just just keep walking on.
00:46:23.900 Pretend you didn't hear it.
00:46:24.880 Everybody had that.
00:46:25.840 But now they have connected with everybody else's person on the street.
00:46:31.960 And so they have this voice.
00:46:36.340 It's the same voice.
00:46:38.020 It's always been.
00:46:38.920 It's just in our face and being used now to terrify all of us.
00:46:45.660 And everything's being used for fear, including a ring doorbell app like I have that where all
00:46:51.800 of a sudden I'm just want to make sure everything's safe in my house.
00:46:54.820 I have cameras in the back.
00:46:56.300 You know, it's I had I had to become a gun owner for my own safety.
00:47:00.700 And it was because of threats that I had gotten from being on like the Kumia show.
00:47:05.800 And so all of a sudden in my ring doorbell app, I'm getting stuff from, you know, other
00:47:09.940 people that have it like there's an ambulance on this street.
00:47:13.140 Does anybody know why?
00:47:14.840 It's like, I think you're a little too worried, but it's people that are shut ins that are
00:47:18.260 always worried about everything.
00:47:19.740 And now they're afraid because they're telling the whole neighborhood what to think and feel
00:47:23.940 and they're worried.
00:47:24.700 And it's it's this it's a market of fear.
00:47:27.440 So are you I mean, I might be one of those ring people affair that are like because I
00:47:34.980 want to my ring.
00:47:36.160 I want I want I love that technology.
00:47:39.680 I love the ease of everything.
00:47:41.620 But I don't trust the gathering of all of that information when it comes to those companies
00:47:48.700 now getting in bed with the government.
00:47:50.620 You're like, well, I don't want you having, you know, a complete visual contact of me all
00:47:58.500 the time.
00:47:58.880 Not like I'm coming home, you know, drenched in blood.
00:48:01.860 But no, I could.
00:48:02.960 I could.
00:48:03.580 I mean, yeah.
00:48:04.360 And then I really don't want it to work.
00:48:06.240 But I just don't want that intrusion.
00:48:10.200 And there's no one to trust, it seems.
00:48:13.060 No.
00:48:13.300 And they're selling you information out.
00:48:14.960 Yeah.
00:48:15.200 I remember when I got a pager and I was, I don't know, 16.
00:48:19.960 And my dad's like, excuse me, doctor.
00:48:21.860 And I'm like, what?
00:48:22.660 He's like, why do you have a pager?
00:48:24.680 And I'm like, you know, my friends.
00:48:26.860 Yeah.
00:48:27.280 I'm like, yeah, exactly.
00:48:28.240 I'm like, my friends want to get a hold of me, you know, in case they're near a pay phone
00:48:31.920 and need a dime bag.
00:48:33.500 But he's like, why do you really need one?
00:48:35.660 And I'm like, I don't know, that's what we have them.
00:48:38.180 He goes, don't you think it's dangerous how easy it is for people to get a hold of you?
00:48:42.320 Yes.
00:48:42.760 And this is in the 90s.
00:48:44.880 But it really bothered him because then it was right when like the internet came out and
00:48:48.800 he liked technology, but he just kept finding it scary how there was this beginning of no
00:48:53.800 privacy.
00:48:55.440 And this was, you know, he passed long before any of this stuff.
00:48:58.400 Yeah.
00:48:58.520 But even then he was warning me about what was going on, how this seems like it's a very,
00:49:03.860 very slippery slope into where you will never have a moment of a day where you can be left
00:49:09.100 alone.
00:49:09.720 Well, if you look at what the World Economic Forum is saying, if you look at even Ray Kurzweil
00:49:15.940 or Stephen Hawking.
00:49:17.620 Yeah.
00:49:18.120 We're talking about things that are so far beyond our understanding because man's never faced
00:49:26.240 anything like this with AI and all of the stuff is coming, that could be the most dangerous
00:49:34.260 cage that nobody ever gets out of except the ruling elite.
00:49:40.060 But they might actually be trapped by, you know, a form of AI that grows beyond them.
00:49:48.820 It is the acting elite in Hollywood may be ruined by AI because it's like, oh, we have
00:49:54.480 actors with no ego.
00:49:56.280 Yeah.
00:49:56.840 They're like, oh, that's great.
00:49:57.960 Yeah.
00:49:58.080 We don't have to pay them.
00:49:59.080 Right.
00:49:59.420 Oh, it's wonderful.
00:50:00.940 That can completely get completely happen.
00:50:03.520 There's no doubt about it.
00:50:04.280 I mean, in a very selfish way.
00:50:05.640 I mean, when it gets good enough, I thought I'm going to fake my death, you know, and just
00:50:11.680 hide it.
00:50:12.760 And then I'll just have me.
00:50:15.160 I'll just get up in the morning, take two minutes and go, talk about this.
00:50:18.420 And I'll be on TV and radio talking about that forever.
00:50:21.740 It's getting pretty solid.
00:50:23.240 I've been making a few porns of me.
00:50:25.500 It's just me and me.
00:50:26.620 They don't sell well.
00:50:27.820 No, no.
00:50:28.720 I'm the only buyer.
00:50:30.980 Right.
00:50:31.420 It's like a fine wine.
00:50:33.160 You know, you have to develop a taste for it.
00:50:37.020 Is there anything that is off limits?
00:50:43.780 No.
00:50:44.400 Yeah.
00:50:45.560 I used to say to my writers when we were doing, I was doing comedy shows early in my
00:50:52.600 career, and I said, I don't know, this might be over the line.
00:50:59.320 And I look at them and, is it funny?
00:51:01.420 If it's funny, never cut funny.
00:51:04.420 Ever.
00:51:05.680 That's the difference.
00:51:06.740 Like, there has to be this level where it's like, if you're doing something for complete
00:51:11.020 offense, just to be offensive.
00:51:13.400 Right.
00:51:14.040 Why?
00:51:15.040 But if it's hilarious, who cares?
00:51:17.980 I mean, I've never felt that anything should be, if it's done the right way, no.
00:51:24.220 Never.
00:51:25.360 And I've heard the most offensive jokes in the world.
00:51:28.100 And everyone I've heard is funny.
00:51:31.180 To me.
00:51:31.900 I mean, I'm not saying everybody would like them.
00:51:33.820 Right.
00:51:34.200 But, you know, to me, funny.
00:51:36.320 But, yeah, I don't find anything to be over the line.
00:51:39.040 And maybe I'm somebody that can take it a little more.
00:51:41.240 Like, sometimes I'll be hanging out with people at a party, and because I'm jaded, I'll say
00:51:45.840 something, and I'll be like, oh, man, I, yeah, yeah.
00:51:48.340 And you're like, well, that's, that's the one I shouldn't have gone with.
00:51:52.100 You know, and that's, and you guys to reel it in, and amongst other people.
00:51:56.880 Right.
00:51:57.080 Yeah.
00:51:57.400 Like, oh, right, you have a soul.
00:51:59.480 So, it just depends.
00:52:01.560 It's, but for me, yeah, no, there's no line.
00:52:10.580 You look at social media today and TikTok, and you see, I don't know if you saw the new
00:52:17.920 app that came out this week.
00:52:20.000 This is terrifying.
00:52:21.640 It's a new app.
00:52:22.420 It's a filter.
00:52:22.960 It makes, it doesn't work well with men, just women.
00:52:27.180 Yeah.
00:52:27.600 But it makes you absolutely model beautiful.
00:52:34.480 And so I don't need it.
00:52:36.980 No, I can't work that many miracles.
00:52:39.520 Okay.
00:52:39.860 It's weird.
00:52:40.620 It doesn't seem to work really well with men.
00:52:43.420 Yeah.
00:52:43.720 But with women, I mean, you'll see these people, and there's a couple that are like, oh, I don't
00:52:48.300 look like that at all.
00:52:49.240 And it, you know, just, they take the filter off, and you're like, really?
00:52:53.760 Yeah.
00:52:53.900 Put a little bit of makeup on, and you look like that.
00:52:56.360 Right.
00:52:56.660 But then, there's some that are just, woof.
00:53:01.360 Yeah.
00:53:01.720 And they are beautiful in the filter.
00:53:04.660 And every single woman that I saw doing it said the same thing.
00:53:10.160 This is so bad.
00:53:13.020 Is it called Tinder?
00:53:17.380 That's terrifying, though.
00:53:18.820 It's terrifying.
00:53:19.820 All of the women are saying, this is so bad.
00:53:22.260 They want it, but they know this is horrible, because I don't look like that.
00:53:30.100 We're living in a time where we have this impossible standard of beauty, while we're also trying
00:53:35.520 to embrace the worst things about somebody.
00:53:39.320 Now, I shouldn't say the worst, but if you happen to be obese, you happen to be these things
00:53:43.440 that people might find on a trip, whatever it might be.
00:53:46.380 I don't care.
00:53:47.680 But it's like, for other people, that's something that they might look at, however they are flawed,
00:53:53.240 where we don't embrace flaw, but then we're supposed to embrace flaw.
00:53:56.360 That's what I don't understand.
00:53:57.880 We're living in a time where you go, okay, Lizzo's gorgeous.
00:54:00.420 We want to love her for her body, whatever it is, while simultaneously saying, you're not
00:54:05.220 good enough.
00:54:05.860 You're not worth it.
00:54:07.240 You should look this good.
00:54:08.640 That's why we created this app.
00:54:10.220 It's a confusion and a consumerism that I'll never understand.
00:54:13.660 So, it just makes people feel like they don't...
00:54:17.820 But they're both lies.
00:54:19.940 Correct.
00:54:20.420 They're both lies.
00:54:21.700 That's what I don't get.
00:54:22.560 And then you have this reality in the middle that isn't acceptable, which is who you are
00:54:27.220 and who you should be.
00:54:28.960 And there's nothing...
00:54:29.640 And men, we're gross anyway.
00:54:31.680 I do not understand why women would even...
00:54:35.160 I don't understand why other guys are interested in other guys, let alone women.
00:54:39.040 I don't get it at all.
00:54:40.180 Yeah, like where you're like, because yeah, I grew up around guys.
00:54:42.600 It's like, they were disgusting.
00:54:44.020 You're disgusting.
00:54:44.860 Just awful creatures.
00:54:46.360 And then you look at women and they're just works of art.
00:54:49.320 And it's like, you don't even need an app to realize how beautiful you are.
00:54:53.220 Like, you're made to be perfect.
00:54:56.560 And then to have this on top of it, it's this competition with themselves that they don't
00:55:02.240 even need to be having that creates an insecurity amongst them that they don't deserve.
00:55:06.940 One of the things I fight with all the time, because I realized at one point last summer,
00:55:16.880 I think our family, we were on vacation.
00:55:19.140 And I think it was like the third day when I realized we hadn't said a genuine, kind thing
00:55:28.640 to one another in three days.
00:55:30.980 It's just, just wrecking.
00:55:34.640 And I mean, all of us are just, we just keep stepping it up, you know?
00:55:40.380 And I thought, I don't know if this is real healthy.
00:55:48.420 Sarcasm is, and I also realized a few years earlier, unfortunately, and I wish, I mean,
00:55:55.500 this is tragic, but I have a daughter with cerebral palsy and she's very literal, okay?
00:56:01.420 Yeah, oh yeah.
00:56:02.000 And, and I didn't, I didn't realize with all the sarcasm that's going on, you know, I know
00:56:10.920 she's very literal, but I didn't think like, you know how much you get sarcasm?
00:56:15.280 Right.
00:56:15.660 No.
00:56:15.900 Uh, and I, I just, I, I find myself in this place where it's like, I don't know, is that
00:56:22.700 good or bad sarcasm?
00:56:26.760 It's, yeah, it's tough.
00:56:28.760 I mean, if you know it for sure, I think it's, I think it's my favorite.
00:56:34.180 It's good though to me.
00:56:35.800 I mean, yeah, especially my son is very sarcastic.
00:56:38.540 He was like seven or eight.
00:56:40.040 Like I'll be excited about something or like an accomplishment I had.
00:56:43.300 Yeah.
00:56:43.700 Oh, I just did this and it went really well.
00:56:45.400 And you know, my son will just kind of go like, oh yeah, dad, that's really good.
00:56:49.460 You should be really proud of yourself.
00:56:51.480 And he sees seven.
00:56:53.440 I know.
00:56:53.860 And he just walks away and I'm like, I'm like, that hurt a lot.
00:56:58.520 It's like, why did you just kick me?
00:57:00.160 I know.
00:57:00.740 You know, and they get it though at this like young age and we were driving the other day
00:57:05.400 and we were late and to, uh, going to my brother's house and he goes, that's fine.
00:57:10.180 Your brother's always late.
00:57:11.220 Why don't you just blame it on him?
00:57:12.440 Like you always do.
00:57:13.460 I was like, what?
00:57:15.400 I was like, do I, I'm like, do I have two wives?
00:57:18.540 You know, it's just, he'll just say stuff where, so I, yeah, I think it just depends,
00:57:23.160 but I, I, I enjoy it.
00:57:25.440 Cause I think it's a fun way to be dry.
00:57:27.820 I love it.
00:57:28.540 I had a, uh, uh, a meeting with an executive at premier radio, uh, when they were first
00:57:35.080 hiring me to do syndicated talk.
00:57:37.300 Okay.
00:57:37.800 And, uh, he was the vice president in charge of the talk industry.
00:57:42.140 And, uh, so I had to go out and meet him.
00:57:44.580 It was the last interview I had to do.
00:57:45.920 And I sat at the steakhouse in New York city and Paul Castellano was shot outside.
00:57:54.480 Sorry.
00:57:54.920 And he was, he, everything he said, and I, I knew nothing about him and nobody warned
00:58:02.080 me about this.
00:58:03.080 Everything he said was either sarcastic or he was an ass.
00:58:09.380 Yeah.
00:58:09.560 You know what I mean?
00:58:10.100 And I walked out of that building and I said, I either love that guy or hate his guts.
00:58:19.360 You know what I mean?
00:58:20.460 Cause if he's serious, he's a monster, but he's the kind of guy, a little like Kaufman
00:58:29.380 that he just enjoyed it himself and he wasn't doing it for anybody else's laughs.
00:58:35.220 He's, he just likes to just watch people.
00:58:37.960 Yeah.
00:58:38.160 You know, and, uh, turns out, uh, he was very sarcastic, which worked out well for me.
00:58:43.780 Yeah.
00:58:44.080 Otherwise I probably would have been on a killing spree with him.
00:58:46.300 But, uh, uh, it's, it's, uh, it's bizarre.
00:58:51.140 Um, let me ask you, um, I had Jim Brewer on, I don't know, a couple of months ago.
00:58:57.220 Okay.
00:58:57.760 Yeah.
00:58:58.060 I saw the interview.
00:58:58.820 Yeah.
00:58:59.400 He is funny.
00:59:00.300 Yeah, he is funny.
00:59:01.040 He really is.
00:59:01.660 And, uh, we talked afterwards and I said, uh, cause he's very spiritual.
00:59:07.300 Spiritual, very spiritual.
00:59:08.800 Yes.
00:59:09.740 And, uh, uh, I said, you gotta do a comedy special on religion.
00:59:17.220 Cause he can approach it in such a way where he's skeptical and, you know, all the true
00:59:23.160 stories that he went through, um, that I think a lot of people, cause, because religious
00:59:27.800 people are always perceived as having a stick up their butt.
00:59:31.100 Yeah, of course.
00:59:32.700 Yeah.
00:59:33.520 Are you religious?
00:59:34.900 You were, cause you're, you grew up Catholic.
00:59:36.620 Yes.
00:59:36.820 Are you religious or are you spiritual?
00:59:39.220 Are you nothing?
00:59:40.520 It's odd.
00:59:41.200 Uh, no, no, I believe in God.
00:59:43.320 Um, I do.
00:59:44.020 I pray.
00:59:44.560 I do.
00:59:45.340 Um, but I have battled with it at times and it was kind of being sober and finding a God,
00:59:52.440 you know, that I believed and sort of taking pieces of what I thought different religions
00:59:58.760 worked for me and it's not that I don't believe in Catholicism.
01:00:03.080 I was very, very angry at the church for what they covered up.
01:00:07.260 That's just the truth.
01:00:08.040 You were an altar boy.
01:00:09.220 Yes.
01:00:09.740 Yeah.
01:00:10.040 Oh yeah.
01:00:10.500 Still.
01:00:11.200 I mean, you still can't sit.
01:00:13.480 I, uh, uh, no, my, it was my brother.
01:00:20.280 But that didn't happen to you.
01:00:21.660 No, no, no.
01:00:22.240 Thankfully, thankfully not.
01:00:23.500 I wasn't, uh, I wasn't that cute enough.
01:00:25.720 Yeah.
01:00:26.340 It was, uh, I tried.
01:00:27.960 Did you feel kind of like, you know, it's not that I want it.
01:00:31.520 I started dressing sexier.
01:00:33.440 I, uh, I would put glitter on before mass.
01:00:38.760 Yeah.
01:00:39.340 Um, I, I, that was disheartening to me though, because I, uh, even when my mom would kill
01:00:44.780 herself, she was very devout and we would go to church sometimes three times a week to
01:00:50.380 the point where even God was like, you want to slow down?
01:00:53.460 Like, you know, you're really becoming kind of a groupie.
01:00:56.500 Yeah.
01:00:56.640 It's been much, you know, it's like, look, I get it.
01:00:59.500 You, you, you're doing it right.
01:01:00.940 Right.
01:01:01.340 Yeah.
01:01:01.980 Um, but I am, yeah, I am.
01:01:04.400 And I do go to church here and there and I, I wouldn't say that I'm, you know, certainly
01:01:08.820 this very, very devout in the sense of, I follow all the rules, do everything right.
01:01:14.040 I'm not, I very much just believe on, believe very strongly in treating other people.
01:01:19.260 Well, being kind to other people and just praying to God, knowing that I am completely
01:01:25.820 flawed in every way imaginable.
01:01:27.700 And I try to do work on the side that I can do privately to help other people do what
01:01:33.840 I do.
01:01:34.440 This is not, this is now it feels kind of like, well, like kind of like you're, you're saying
01:01:40.240 too much, like I'm covering and I, I help people on the weekends.
01:01:45.360 And I, yeah, yeah, yeah, look, I killed a guy on the way too much.
01:01:52.940 I, when I used to drink, you know, you wake up in the morning and you, you go, well, I
01:01:56.820 hope that's deer blood on the hood of my car.
01:02:02.340 I guess deers wear shoelaces.
01:02:04.900 Um, yeah, uh, I am, but it's like, I can't say I'm a particular religion to be honest with
01:02:10.920 you.
01:02:11.060 I guess is what I'm trying to say.
01:02:12.340 I, I, I, but I don't hate the Catholic church.
01:02:16.540 Like I, I, I did for a minute.
01:02:18.460 And that's the truth because I was very, very angry at what happened.
01:02:22.560 But now that I've had priests come to my shows that are fans, they find the jokes funny.
01:02:27.220 I've been able to open my eyes to go, well, there was a serious problem going on.
01:02:32.160 There may still be.
01:02:33.820 So, so the fact that they go to your show and find your filthy comedy.
01:02:42.820 Funny doesn't make you question them as priests.
01:02:45.160 No, I think it's great.
01:02:46.340 Yeah, it's kind of true.
01:02:47.520 But like, I'll, I'll even go out to him and go, sorry about that whole altar boy part.
01:02:50.940 And they'll be like, I'm just glad it went by quick.
01:02:54.280 Glad I wasn't wearing the collar.
01:02:57.620 Yeah.
01:02:57.940 They'll be in like one of my shirts.
01:02:59.360 Yeah, I guess it's, it's, it's hard for me to answer, you know, then, then a simple yes
01:03:06.360 or no.
01:03:06.740 Cause it's like, yes, I do believe in God and I do believe that there is something that
01:03:12.680 has created us.
01:03:13.700 But I, I, at the moment I'm trying to figure out not so much what that is, but what I believe
01:03:19.860 fully.
01:03:20.620 Yeah.
01:03:21.520 Is the best way.
01:03:22.280 I don't think, I mean, I keep.
01:03:25.220 But yeah, it does sound more where I'm like, no, I try to be nice.
01:03:28.300 I don't, uh, yeah, I don't, I don't, I don't know.
01:03:32.480 I, I, I do stuff.
01:03:34.920 Yeah.
01:03:35.180 Um, I've never, I, you know, I, I don't traffic no more, you know, it's just sort of.
01:03:40.520 I don't traffic no more.
01:03:42.380 Yeah.
01:03:42.880 I, uh.
01:03:44.060 But I do believe in God.
01:03:45.140 Yeah.
01:03:45.400 I think, uh, my father, when he died, um, he was so open-minded on almost everything.
01:03:54.820 Um, and I really loved that about him.
01:03:58.740 Uh, he could find the, he could find the joy other people had in things that he didn't
01:04:06.940 necessarily agree with, you know, but he thought this is great.
01:04:11.180 Um, and towards the end of his life, he became just so calcified and he became a different man.
01:04:19.340 And I think the secret to never getting old and also probably to a better afterlife is
01:04:30.540 just always question always.
01:04:34.320 I don't know.
01:04:35.740 I don't know.
01:04:36.580 I mean, I know what I believe, but I could get to the other side and it's like nothing
01:04:42.220 like that.
01:04:42.800 Maybe it's that, you know, the elephant and the eight armed woman up there.
01:04:46.520 Yeah.
01:04:46.680 I'd be shocked.
01:04:47.780 I'd be shocked if it was, but think about that.
01:04:50.280 If I'm, you know, if I'm up there and I'm dead and that's the reality, I guess I'm like,
01:04:55.380 I'm Hindu or whatever that really, yeah.
01:04:58.740 You're like, oh, is that close enough?
01:05:00.180 Are you just, yeah, you wake up and you're a lizard and you're like, yeah.
01:05:04.820 And I thought about that too, where I think that's, that's the part that bothers me sometimes
01:05:10.020 about religion where it's like, I know exactly what happens and I judge you very hard for
01:05:14.220 it.
01:05:14.380 Right.
01:05:15.040 And, and, and I don't know.
01:05:17.220 All I know is nothing.
01:05:20.320 And, and I was raised to question everything.
01:05:23.000 It's like when I was young, my dad was, I saw JFK in the theater when I was nine and
01:05:28.280 like we would go to Gettysburg, we would go to all these history places and that's where
01:05:32.460 we, and I actually had interest in it as a kid, but it was basically my dad saying,
01:05:36.920 Hey, the CIA killed this guy.
01:05:39.080 I'm like nine, you know?
01:05:40.500 And it's like, don't trust anything.
01:05:42.000 Don't try.
01:05:42.580 And I always learned like, don't necessarily believe anything that you see as fact.
01:05:47.740 And that's how I grew up to believe everything is just don't necessarily believe what's on
01:05:53.280 the surface.
01:05:53.680 Correct.
01:05:53.840 Like you said, always ask questions.
01:05:55.920 That's how I was raised.
01:05:56.840 Isn't it crazy?
01:05:57.340 I, I mean, I remember the JFK thing, you know, there was more shooters, blah, blah, blah.
01:06:05.680 He was a CIA agent.
01:06:07.020 And when I got older, I could look into those things and go, well, maybe, I don't know, but
01:06:12.080 maybe, but now it's starting to come out and you're like, good God, it looks like the CIA
01:06:20.460 or somebody involved in the government did kill him.
01:06:24.380 Yes.
01:06:25.340 I mean, it's almost as if everything you believed is crumbling and that is so dangerous because
01:06:33.320 you, you got to hold onto something.
01:06:35.540 Is there anything that was real?
01:06:37.920 Do you feel like that ever?
01:06:39.240 Yes.
01:06:39.440 All the time.
01:06:40.540 Because everything that I look at is somehow related to something that you were supposed
01:06:44.440 to believe in.
01:06:45.280 You were supposed to believe in some, you were supposed to believe in some level of decency
01:06:49.440 and some level of protection.
01:06:51.260 And the reality is, is all along, it's been a level of power.
01:06:56.100 And that's what bothers me about everything that's going on.
01:06:59.340 It's the same thing with, if people look at a global thing or everything that's going
01:07:02.860 on right now, what is the benefit of everything?
01:07:05.540 That's the benefit of everything that's happened in the last few years.
01:07:07.460 Power.
01:07:08.360 That's it.
01:07:10.000 And what does power want?
01:07:11.880 More power.
01:07:12.560 That's it.
01:07:13.000 They don't care.
01:07:14.300 It's the same as, you know, I know that you talk about certain things people had to
01:07:20.320 take.
01:07:21.520 You know, you look at Woody Harrelson the other night on SNL and how people are getting
01:07:24.980 mad.
01:07:25.520 And it's like, for what?
01:07:27.080 For saying what happened?
01:07:29.040 He just said what happened.
01:07:30.700 That's all he said.
01:07:32.560 And people are outraged.
01:07:34.240 Why are you outraged?
01:07:36.040 It's just what happened.
01:07:38.440 That's the part I don't understand.
01:07:39.840 Why did you not question it?
01:07:41.720 Why did you think that that was a good?
01:07:43.860 Again, I have every vaccine imaginable.
01:07:46.920 The one that I didn't take was the one that seemed a little odd.
01:07:50.740 Like even in my special, when I talk about, you know, if I got the polio vaccine and the
01:07:55.120 next morning I woke up and I'm like, why are my legs all noodley?
01:07:58.420 You know, I'm just, you know, across the floor.
01:08:02.100 Yeah.
01:08:02.460 It's like, I would have questions.
01:08:04.020 So I just kept noticing everybody was getting sick.
01:08:08.100 So I'm like, well, this isn't effective.
01:08:09.940 And I kept flying and I would go to like Florida or Alabama that would let me do shows.
01:08:14.380 And people are like, you're the biggest germaphobe I know.
01:08:16.660 Why are you flying?
01:08:17.460 I'm like, there's no one on the plane.
01:08:19.400 I get first class.
01:08:20.660 I pay $80 and then they pump me up.
01:08:23.420 No one's on the plane.
01:08:24.720 I can still make money as a performer.
01:08:26.960 I am like, this is absurd.
01:08:29.000 Like you putting a mask on with your germy hands is absurd.
01:08:33.720 And it's because I grew up with somebody who was teaching me about germs constantly.
01:08:38.860 So it all didn't add up.
01:08:40.600 And the way that people didn't question it and politicized it made no sense.
01:08:45.520 And then switched.
01:08:47.140 Like the left was completely against Trump.
01:08:50.200 It was at warp speed, all this.
01:08:52.240 Don't take the vaccine.
01:08:53.300 Don't do this.
01:08:53.940 Don't do that for it.
01:08:54.940 Yeah.
01:08:55.320 Then in one day they were like, yeah, you got to take Biden's vaccine.
01:08:59.200 But yeah, you got to do this.
01:09:00.340 Right.
01:09:00.680 And they were against big pharmaceuticals.
01:09:03.840 But in the worst pharmaceutical incident, I think maybe since Bayer in Germany, you're
01:09:13.400 seeing that this is collusion with the government and it's all cover-ups.
01:09:18.400 And yet those same people who were right to question pharmaceuticals are now like, don't
01:09:24.560 say that about Pfizer.
01:09:26.040 How dare you say that about Pfizer?
01:09:27.200 Yeah.
01:09:27.640 Why would a company ever, ever do something against you?
01:09:31.940 It's not like they created an epidemic of opioids.
01:09:35.340 And I'm young enough to, or, you know, and I'm old enough to remember where I worked at
01:09:40.100 a pharmacy in the nineties, which is a great place for a drug addict to work.
01:09:43.720 Oh, it's really good.
01:09:44.540 Especially when they weren't really counting anything.
01:09:46.460 Right.
01:09:47.040 Because you could just get a handful of Valium and just throw some nickels in there.
01:09:51.240 You know, but it was, I remember though, the, the Oxy wraps and the Vicodin wraps.
01:09:59.120 And I mean, you could have an Oxy pen at the doctor's office, you know, like this was something
01:10:03.200 that they were selling.
01:10:04.440 Oh yeah.
01:10:04.780 They were really pushing it, everything.
01:10:06.520 And I'm not against opioids for the proper use of them.
01:10:09.100 Right.
01:10:09.220 But I don't believe that anybody should have to live in pain.
01:10:12.840 Not at all.
01:10:13.580 You know, there's enough stuff to kill it, but you know, fentanyl is an end of life drug.
01:10:20.860 That's what it says on the box.
01:10:22.060 It's for hospice.
01:10:23.020 End of life use only.
01:10:25.180 For hospice.
01:10:26.260 Yeah.
01:10:26.380 And sadly I've lost, oh man, at least 15 friends in the last two years.
01:10:33.720 From fentanyl?
01:10:34.200 Oh yeah.
01:10:34.740 Because it was in cocaine.
01:10:37.640 And I don't know why people are still doing cocaine, but then it's in there.
01:10:42.140 There's the tiniest bit.
01:10:43.620 They don't know what it's for.
01:10:45.120 They don't know if it's for, because they make it for a different degree of, you know,
01:10:48.940 some is for people, some is for elephants, some is for the, you know, and then it ends
01:10:52.980 up killing them.
01:10:54.680 It's like, I wouldn't touch any of that stuff now, but that's a drug that is designed to
01:11:00.740 kill you peacefully.
01:11:01.720 And it's just being made and pumped out.
01:11:07.400 You're on the road now.
01:11:08.740 Yes.
01:11:09.140 Where are you going?
01:11:10.380 I will be in, let's see, where am I going?
01:11:13.920 I'm going to the Ice House in Pasadena, California.
01:11:17.500 And then I will be at the Comedy Zone in Greenville, South Carolina.
01:11:21.400 When are you at Milk Through Your Nose?
01:11:23.660 I will be, what, every other Wednesday?
01:11:28.040 Every other Wednesday.
01:11:29.320 Okay.
01:11:30.460 Sounds like a club that would exist.
01:11:34.060 Yeah, I'm at Yuck Yucks and Milk Through My Nose.
01:11:36.520 Yeah.
01:11:37.080 I'm at Barn Yucks, Huckle House.
01:11:39.580 Well, I hope we see more of you.
01:11:42.860 You're very funny.
01:11:43.480 Thank you.
01:11:43.760 I really enjoyed talking to you.
01:11:45.520 Comedy specials just unbelievably offensive, but very funny.
01:11:50.480 Thank you so much.
01:11:51.140 Thank you.
01:11:57.280 Just a reminder, I'd love you to rate and subscribe to the podcast and pass this on to a friend
01:12:02.900 so it can be discovered by other people.
01:12:04.520 We'll see you next time.
01:12:17.320 Bye-bye.
01:12:21.460 Bye.
01:12:27.780 Bye-bye.
01:12:28.620 Bye-bye.
01:12:29.220 Bye-bye.
01:12:30.260 Bye-bye.
01:12:30.860 Bye-bye.