The Joe Rogan Experience - Joe Rogan Experience #144 - Eddie Bravo

00:00:00.000 I don't know.

00:00:01.000 We're not really on YouTube. 0.99

00:00:02.000 But we're on Ustream right now, bitches! 1.00

00:00:05.000 Are we on? 0.99

00:00:05.000 We're on right now. 0.99

00:00:06.000 The Joe Rogan Experience podcast is brought to you by The Fleshlight.

00:00:09.000 If you go to JoeRogan.net and click on the link for The Fleshlight, you get 15% off the number one sex toy for men.

00:00:17.000 I also want to thank Jolt Servers.

00:00:19.000 Jolt Servers are the ones who are hosting us.

00:00:22.000 That's Jason's company. 0.98

00:00:24.000 And he's a cool motherfucker and a good friend of mine. 0.98

00:00:27.000 And also Onnit.com, makers of AlphaBrain. 0.98

00:00:31.000 And if you go to JoeRogan.net or if you go to AlphaBrain, whatever, if you go to Onnit.com, that's what we got to do, right?

00:00:37.000 O-N-N-I-T. O-N-N-I-T. We just smoked way too much weed.

00:00:53.000 Here we go.

00:00:55.000 The Joe Rogan Experience. 1.00

00:01:07.000 We just mixed a bunch of shit man. 1.00

00:01:09.000 We mixed some shit called Moon Rocks in with some other stuff. 1.00

00:01:13.000 Was Moon Rock Sativa or was it also... 0.99

00:01:15.000 Oh, no.

00:01:16.000 There was an OG Indica. 0.99

00:01:17.000 Oh, Jesus.

00:01:18.000 There was a deep couch lock weed.

00:01:19.000 And then we mixed it in with that other stuff.

00:01:22.000 No Susquehanna today. 1.00

00:01:24.000 You brought up the big shit. 1.00

00:01:25.000 No Susquehanna. 1.00

00:01:25.000 We're not fucking around. 1.00

00:01:26.000 You didn't bring out that blueberry orange from 2005? 0.99

00:01:30.000 We're not fucking around. 0.97

00:01:31.000 Did you throw that away? 0.99

00:01:32.000 I got rid of all that stuff. 0.99

00:01:34.000 It was the best shit back in 2005. It was. 0.99

00:01:39.000 It was before train wreck.

00:01:40.000 When I first started buying weed before we had...

00:01:44.000 Before we had licenses, I would always buy mad quantities because I didn't want to have to deal with those dudes, but I always had just way too much weed laying around.

00:01:51.000 Dude, it was incredible.

00:01:54.000 It's a funny subject, this marijuana, and there's a lot of controversy behind it.

00:01:59.000 And I'm not giving in.

00:02:02.000 I'm tired of it. 1.00

00:02:03.000 It's a stupid topic. 1.00

00:02:05.000 It's a bunch of people, for whatever reason, care about what other people are doing. 1.00

00:02:11.000 And there's always this same tired-ass fucking argument about, what about children? 0.99

00:02:17.000 You're setting an example to the children. 0.99

00:02:19.000 To what?

00:02:20.000 To what?

00:02:20.000 To eventually be a person who's an adult who enjoys marijuana?

00:02:24.000 That's life.

00:02:25.000 That is real life.

00:02:27.000 Like, why do we have to pretend to hide that? 1.00

00:02:30.000 Parent your fucking kids and don't let them do anything until they're in their 20s. 1.00

00:02:34.000 I don't think kids should be getting drunk. 1.00

00:02:36.000 I think you barely can keep your fucking shit together as a teenager as it is, emotionally, psychologically, to get drunk on top of that. 1.00

00:02:43.000 I mean, I did it. 1.00

00:02:44.000 I know you did it.

00:02:45.000 But it's a terrible idea. 0.99

00:02:47.000 If I was going to be honest with my kids, I would say, don't get drunk, don't get high, don't do shit while you're developing. 0.98

00:02:52.000 Become a man first, you know? 0.99

00:02:54.000 People ask me why I'm so vocal about it, and the reason I'm vocal about it is because I can get thrown in jail for it.

00:03:02.000 So I'm going to be vocal about it until there's absolutely no possibility that I can get thrown in jail.

00:03:08.000 This is for the kids, too. 0.98

00:03:09.000 I'm fucking making a stand here. 0.99

00:03:11.000 You're making a stand here. 0.99

00:03:12.000 In the future, by the time the kids are 18, 19, 20, hopefully it'll be legal.

00:03:16.000 So we're doing this for the kids.

00:03:18.000 But, you know, I'm a big fan of Coca-Cola.

00:03:21.000 I love Coke, but I never talk about it. 0.98

00:03:23.000 But if it was illegal, if it was illegal to drink soda and you can get thrown in jail, I'd be talking about it every goddamn day. 0.96

00:03:29.000 I'm like... 1.00

00:03:30.000 I'm drinking this fucking soda. 1.00

00:03:31.000 I'll be videotaping me drinking soda. 1.00

00:03:33.000 It's okay.

00:03:34.000 Why are we being thrown in jail?

00:03:36.000 Look, I'm a productive guy drinking Coke, but you know what?

00:03:39.000 It's legal.

00:03:39.000 I'm not talking about it.

00:03:41.000 And when weed is legal, 100% all the way through, I'm going to shut the fuck up about it. 0.98

00:03:46.000 Watch. 0.98

00:03:50.000 I'm not going to shut up about it.

00:03:52.000 It's a positive thing.

00:03:54.000 And that's what people aren't willing to accept.

00:03:56.000 So many people want to think that it shows a negative image or it sends a negative message that you need something to get through your life with.

00:04:04.000 And that's not what anybody's saying.

00:04:05.000 You don't need it.

00:04:07.000 You don't need it.

00:04:07.000 But it's good.

00:04:09.000 It's that simple.

00:04:10.000 It's the wonder drug for me.

00:04:11.000 Like, instead of taking Tylenol, I'll smoke some weed.

00:04:13.000 Instead of doing this...

00:04:15.000 It's so safe.

00:04:16.000 Weed is so safe that if you smoke too much, you might call the cops on yourself.

00:04:21.000 You're not gonna call the cops on yourself if you do a lot of heroin or you get too drunk.

00:04:25.000 Can you imagine getting too drunk and you're calling the cops on yourself?

00:04:27.000 On weed, you'll call the cops on yourself sometimes, you know?

00:04:31.000 Yeah, weed is the safest of all of them.

00:04:33.000 And it's the most introspective of all of them.

00:04:36.000 You know, alcohol doesn't make you introspective. 1.00

00:04:38.000 It makes you an asshole. 1.00

00:04:39.000 But weed makes you, like, sensitive about the things that you're saying. 1.00

00:04:42.000 It makes you more aware of when you're being socially awkward. 1.00

00:04:46.000 You know, you feel the sting of, you know, weird shit coming out of your mouth. 1.00

00:04:50.000 Whereas when you're drunk, you don't give a fuck. 1.00

00:04:52.000 It just comes back. 1.00

00:04:54.000 It just pours out.

00:04:55.000 It's an amazing thing that so many people believe different. 0.94

00:05:00.000 And yeah, it can fuck up your life. 0.99

00:05:02.000 There's people that can smoke pot and become losers. 1.00

00:05:04.000 But guess what? 0.99

00:05:06.000 They would have been losers anyway. 0.97

00:05:07.000 That's really what it is. 1.00

00:05:09.000 It's like what you're saying is the lazy people with no ambition who aren't that bright, pot gets a hold of them, it's going to fuck up their life. 0.99

00:05:17.000 Well, guess what? 1.00

00:05:18.000 Their life is already fucked up. 0.99

00:05:19.000 You come to certain roadblocks or certain things in your life where you have to sort of make decisions about your behavior, where you sort of have to reassess yourself, and if you can't get through the weed hurdle, Really? 1.00

00:05:34.000 How the fuck are you going to deal with the real world if you can't get through the hurdle of weed? 0.96

00:05:39.000 Because weed to me is the truth. 0.99

00:05:42.000 That's what it is. 0.98

00:05:43.000 When I smoke pot, yeah, I can say a lot of silly shit and you get weird and start talking about the universe, but what it is to me is the truth. 0.99

00:05:51.000 Anything that's bullshit, anything that's a lie, anything that's like... 0.99

00:05:56.000 Blatantly misleading when you're high is just glaring. 0.99

00:06:00.000 Like acting is glaring.

00:06:02.000 If you go to see a movie high and they're bad actors, it's glaring.

00:06:06.000 If you watch a political speech when you're high, it's glaring. 1.00

00:06:10.000 You feel the bullshit. 1.00

00:06:12.000 When you're like, what the fuck am I listening to? 1.00

00:06:15.000 It's like offensive to you. 0.99

00:06:17.000 People have the wrong impression, man.

00:06:20.000 And it's a shame.

00:06:22.000 It really is a shame.

00:06:23.000 It's not that everyone should do it.

00:06:25.000 You don't have to do it.

00:06:26.000 But you shouldn't be upset if someone's telling you an honest interpretation of the positive experiences they have on it.

00:06:34.000 And people will go, well, you know, why do you always have to talk about it? 0.91

00:06:37.000 It's fucking annoying. 0.99

00:06:38.000 All you guys ever fucking talk about is weed. 0.99

00:06:40.000 Because there's still people out there that are arguing against it. 0.99

00:06:44.000 There's still people out there that don't get it.

00:06:46.000 It's a personal choice issue.

00:06:49.000 You're a human being.

00:06:51.000 And it's the most Republican of all ideas. 1.00

00:06:54.000 Stay the fuck out of my private life. 0.99

00:06:56.000 Stay the fuck out of my personal life. 0.99

00:06:59.000 Don't let government get too big. 0.98

00:07:01.000 Well, this is exactly what this is.

00:07:03.000 This is only something that's being pushed into illegality by gigantic corporations.

00:07:08.000 It's the only way in this day and age that it would still be illegal.

00:07:14.000 There's resistance because people are making money with it being illegal.

00:07:18.000 It's that simple.

00:07:19.000 And when you look at the movie Reefer Madness, it was made back in the 30s.

00:07:24.000 It was produced by the government.

00:07:27.000 And if you look at that, and you see where it all came from.

00:07:30.000 It all came...

00:07:31.000 That was the beginning.

00:07:32.000 It was actually made by alcohol companies.

00:07:34.000 Yeah.

00:07:34.000 in the beginning, in the beginning, they tried to scare everybody by saying that weed made you kill, it made you crazy, you'll jump out of windows, you'll kill people.

00:07:46.000 They made lots of movies.

00:07:47.000 They made a whole bunch of them in the 30s.

00:07:49.000 That was the reefer madness propaganda.

00:07:53.000 It worked.

00:07:54.000 Any negative thought you have about weed, it stems from that propaganda from the 30s.

00:08:01.000 It's not a conspiracy theory.

00:08:03.000 There's many movies out there that you could watch.

00:08:07.000 You could watch them on YouTube.

00:08:08.000 That's where it started. 0.98

00:08:09.000 The reason why they don't say that you go crazy and you jump out of windows and you kill people and all that shit anymore is because people got hip to it. 0.97

00:08:17.000 They believed it in the 30s and the 40s, but then people were smoking weed in the 50s and 60s. 0.97

00:08:22.000 They were like, it's not making me crazy.

00:08:23.000 This is actually pretty cool.

00:08:24.000 So they had to change their stance slowly.

00:08:27.000 It evolved from weed kills you to weed makes you worthless. 0.99

00:08:34.000 They have a lot of examples because there are a lot of potheads who are worthless, but they're just worthless people. 0.95

00:08:40.000 So they just focus on that. 0.85

00:08:42.000 Any negative thought you have for weed and marijuana, it's because we've all been brainwashed.

00:08:49.000 I used to be the biggest weed hater ever until I was 28 my whole life.

00:08:53.000 I couldn't stand potheads.

00:08:56.000 They made me sick. 1.00

00:08:57.000 I was just like all those guys on the underground who were writing all that shit. 1.00

00:09:00.000 I would have been doing that. 1.00

00:09:02.000 I would have been doing the same fucking thing. 0.99

00:09:04.000 I was annoyed. 1.00

00:09:04.000 Every band I was in had one or two potheads. 1.00

00:09:07.000 They fuck up on stage or they fuck up rehearsing. 1.00

00:09:09.000 I would blame the weed. 1.00

00:09:10.000 I'd go, dude, you fucking high. 1.00

00:09:12.000 You fucking smoking weed. 1.00

00:09:13.000 You can't play bass and smoke weed. 1.00

00:09:15.000 I was so clueless.

00:09:16.000 I didn't have any idea.

00:09:18.000 Every now and then, I'd get talked into smoking weed.

00:09:21.000 There was a high school moment.

00:09:23.000 There was a moment when I was 23, 24, where I freaked the fuck out.

00:09:27.000 I got all paranoid.

00:09:29.000 And I freaked out and I hated it.

00:09:30.000 And weed, what happens when you're high is it's like...

00:09:33.000 A roaring river of information has just flooded into your brain.

00:09:38.000 Some people don't want to ride those wild rapids. 1.00

00:09:40.000 They're like, fuck that, I'll stay in the tent. 0.98

00:09:42.000 Some people are like, yeah, let's ride that wild rapid and just absorb that energy and use it, you know, to benefit yourself. 1.00

00:09:49.000 Some people, you know, when you get paranoid, I still get paranoid every now and then. 0.86

00:09:52.000 Every now and then, that fucking roaring river, I don't want to do that. 0.96

00:09:55.000 You know what I mean? 0.99

00:09:56.000 I just want to, you know, I'm not into it.

00:09:58.000 So, you know...

00:09:59.000 It's all...

00:10:00.000 The paranoia and feeling iry to opposite ends of the spectrum, it's all up to you with the weed.

00:10:08.000 It's all up to you.

00:10:09.000 You smoke weed. 0.99

00:10:09.000 If you can get paranoid, if you can't handle all that information, you want to suppress a lot of that shit, don't get high. 0.99

00:10:15.000 If you've got a lot of crazy, stressful things on your mind, things that are making you nervous, you've got to talk to some people, but you don't know how to say... 0.98

00:10:21.000 You might get fired from your job, or your wife might be cheating on you, or whatever. 0.99

00:10:25.000 You're thinking about all that shit... 1.00

00:10:28.000 If you smoke weed, you're going to focus on that. 1.00

00:10:31.000 I recommend that you start smoking weed around 28, 30. I never recommend weed to kids.

00:10:38.000 I never do.

00:10:39.000 I think it's best if you're fully developed, you know who you are, you know what kind of person you are, especially if you're an artist.

00:10:46.000 You have a lifetime of art and then at 28...

00:10:49.000 You see how your art changes.

00:10:50.000 Whatever art you do, it'll change.

00:10:53.000 So you'll appreciate it the later you wait.

00:10:55.000 I would say wait till 30. Jack Herrera, the greatest hemp activist out there, started smoking weed when he was 35. He was totally anti-weed, just like me, just like Joe.

00:11:03.000 Joe hated potheads.

00:11:04.000 We were all just like you. 1.00

00:11:06.000 All those guys that think they are fucking throwing up in their mouth right now and they're sick of me and Joe talking. 0.99

00:11:12.000 All those guys, we were just like you. 1.00

00:11:14.000 Smart motherfuckers. 1.00

00:11:15.000 You guys are smart. 1.00

00:11:16.000 But that we were brainwashed by the motherfucking government. 1.00

00:11:20.000 We were brainwashed. 1.00

00:11:21.000 It's really simple.

00:11:22.000 So you should be happy that we're trying to tell you the truth.

00:11:25.000 Don't deny the truth.

00:11:26.000 We're telling you the truth, man.

00:11:28.000 And it's not some crazy alien conspiracy. 1.00

00:11:31.000 This is some real shit. 0.99

00:11:32.000 And by the way, it's only our subjective truth. 0.99

00:11:35.000 If your truth is different than my truth, if you do pot and you don't like it, like Stanhope.

00:11:39.000 Stanhope just doesn't like weed.

00:11:40.000 He doesn't like it.

00:11:41.000 He doesn't like the feeling.

00:11:42.000 Which is fine.

00:11:43.000 No one's forcing you to do it.

00:11:45.000 You know, the real problem is when people are upset at other people doing something.

00:11:50.000 It doesn't affect them, but they get upset at it.

00:11:53.000 They see that possible potential weakness in themselves, and so they lash out at it when they see it in someone else.

00:11:59.000 I really think that's what it is.

00:12:01.000 You know, they're scared themselves that it's their future, that they could get hooked on a drug too.

00:12:08.000 And that's how they look at it.

00:12:09.000 It's kind of cool talking about mushrooms.

00:12:13.000 Mushrooms was on a cartoon the other day on a Family Guy.

00:12:17.000 Like Sunday, 9 o'clock, 8.30, Brian found a bag of mushrooms.

00:12:22.000 And they showed the mushrooms that looked like the mushrooms.

00:12:24.000 And then he ate them and went on to this huge mushroom trip.

00:12:27.000 And the whole episode was about Brian shrooming the majority of it.

00:12:31.000 And it was kind of interesting to see that actually they had that on a regular show on TV. Was that the first time that...

00:12:38.000 That maybe a primetime show actually dealt with mushrooms?

00:12:42.000 Well, on Simpsons, Homer Simpson went into a chili cook-off.

00:12:47.000 Right.

00:12:47.000 And he ate a psychedelic pepper.

00:12:48.000 But that was always kind of like, yeah, this is like mushrooms.

00:12:51.000 It wasn't like him eating a mushroom, though, was it?

00:12:54.000 Well, he ate some sort of psychedelic pepper.

00:12:57.000 Pepper.

00:12:57.000 Yeah.

00:12:58.000 Remember?

00:12:58.000 And the peppers made them have these crazy trips.

00:13:00.000 It was the most awesome Simpsons ever.

00:13:02.000 Yeah, so they've done that before.

00:13:04.000 You would love this.

00:13:05.000 I mean, it doesn't really make mushrooms look great.

00:13:07.000 It's not what I see when I shroom on mushrooms, but it's definitely fun to watch while shrooming, I think.

00:13:13.000 There's a new study on mushrooms that magic mushrooms make you a better person.

00:13:19.000 And it stays with you for a while.

00:13:21.000 Yeah, this is crazy.

00:13:23.000 I think it's John Hopkins, yeah.

00:13:25.000 Researchers led by Catherine McLean, a postdoctoral student at John Hopkins University, analyzed personality data on 52 participants, average age of 46 years old, who had participated in the group's earlier research on the drug.

00:13:38.000 These volunteers took psilocybin during two to five sessions at various doses under highly controlled conditions at the hospital.

00:13:46.000 They were also given personality tests before taking psilocybin and again a couple months after each drug session and then again about a year later.

00:13:56.000 And so what they're saying is that all these people have all said that it turns you into a better person.

00:14:03.000 It had a positive effect on their personality.

00:14:07.000 Think about...

00:14:09.000 Some people went unchanged, it said.

00:14:14.000 Think about the fact that a lot of people are saying, oh, you guys are just using the medical thing just as an excuse to smoke pot.

00:14:22.000 Oh, you guys are faking your ailments just to get a medical marijuana card.

00:14:27.000 Yes, we are, dum-dum. 0.66

00:14:30.000 We are.

00:14:31.000 We have to go through the medical thing.

00:14:32.000 This is the process of making it legal.

00:14:34.000 Ultimately, there won't be a medical marijuana.

00:14:38.000 It's just going to be adult use.

00:14:38.000 We're not really faking it, though.

00:14:39.000 I'm not faking it.

00:14:40.000 I smoke weed for exactly what I tell the doctor.

00:14:43.000 I'm not saying a lot of people.

00:14:44.000 There are a lot of people that would just fake or whatever.

00:14:48.000 I'm not saying who, but I'm just saying, yes, we have to get through the medical baby steps.

00:14:53.000 Ultimately, it won't be medical marijuana.

00:14:55.000 It's just going to be adult use.

00:14:56.000 Because now, it's not just neutral.

00:15:02.000 It's not like a vitamin.

00:15:05.000 It's better than a vitamin.

00:15:06.000 It actually cures diseases.

00:15:09.000 It's better than just a vitamin or protein. 0.55

00:15:12.000 I mean, it relieves glaucoma, for instance, and now there are so many studies of it reducing cancerous tumors and all that shit. 0.84

00:15:24.000 Vitamins don't do this. 0.92

00:15:25.000 This is a magic herb with no side effects.

00:15:29.000 There's no side effects.

00:15:30.000 No one's ever died from it.

00:15:32.000 Why are you so worried about your kids doing it?

00:15:34.000 Don't worry about it.

00:15:36.000 I have a son coming, and I'm going to tell him the truth.

00:15:39.000 I'm not going to lie to him.

00:15:40.000 I'm going to tell him the truth about weed, and I'm going to tell him that he should not smoke until he's 28 to 30. Why would you want him to wait so long, though?

00:15:48.000 So that he could appreciate it more.

00:15:50.000 Dude, I've been smoking since I was 15, and I appreciate the fuck out of every time I smoke it.

00:15:54.000 Not everybody, but there are some people, and I've met some people. 0.87

00:15:56.000 You might not be the best example, son.

00:15:58.000 Well, I would think the older you get, when I get older, I've noticed I'm more concerned about my health, because your health starts to go when you're getting old.

00:16:05.000 I think if I were to start smoking weed when I was 30, I would even be more freaked out.

00:16:09.000 You say this, but yet, how do you smoke weed and smoke cigarettes at the same time?

00:16:13.000 Well, I don't do it at the same time.

00:16:15.000 I have one in each hand, and I just go from back and forth.

00:16:17.000 I would think that if I was smoking weed and I was also smoking cigarettes, the fact that I was smoking cigarettes would start to freak me out so bad that I would quit. 0.96

00:16:25.000 I would realize how ridiculous it is and how crazy and terrible it is. 0.98

00:16:29.000 We all know it's ridiculous and terrible and horrible for your body, but we're also addicted to it. 0.99

00:16:33.000 Why don't you just carry around a pack of joints and just smoke joints all day? 0.99

00:16:38.000 Because I don't...

00:16:39.000 I'm not like Joey Diaz style.

00:16:41.000 I like to smoke one or two hits and then go do something.

00:16:44.000 And then later I'll take one or two hits. 0.99

00:16:46.000 I'm not like, I ain't gonna smoke this whole fucking joint. 0.99

00:16:48.000 If you raise your tolerance up... 0.99

00:16:49.000 I don't want to, though.

00:16:50.000 You can get to the habit...

00:16:51.000 I don't like being in a cloud.

00:16:53.000 You can just smoke weed instead of cigarettes.

00:16:55.000 I don't like being in a cloud, though.

00:16:56.000 The weed cloud, you mean?

00:16:57.000 Yeah, the weed cloud.

00:16:58.000 Yeah, you can definitely get in a weed cloud, especially if you're one of those waking bakers. 1.00

00:17:03.000 Especially if your health's not good.

00:17:05.000 My point, Brian, was that I was saying some people that have been smoking since they were like 11 or 12 or whatever, I know some serious artists.

00:17:14.000 They're super creative.

00:17:16.000 And they tell me, I think you're giving the weed too much credit.

00:17:20.000 I mean, weed just chills me out.

00:17:22.000 They smoke weed all day, every day.

00:17:24.000 Amazing artist.

00:17:25.000 It just chills me out.

00:17:26.000 I go, dude, look at your gallery, dude.

00:17:29.000 You're one of the most creative mothers doing sculptures and you don't think the weed has... 0.65

00:17:33.000 And it was hard for him to see it because he was always artistic and he always smoked weed.

00:17:37.000 So he couldn't see the difference.

00:17:39.000 If he wouldn't have smoked weed and he did all this artistic stuff, he would have still been a great artist, I'm sure.

00:17:44.000 But there would have been a difference in the art.

00:17:45.000 If he would have been an artist until he was 28 and then started smoking, his art would have definitely changed.

00:17:52.000 And what I'm saying is...

00:17:53.000 I would be way more concerned about my kid being an alcoholic or getting addicted to coke or something. 1.00

00:18:01.000 Shit that people die from. 0.99

00:18:04.000 Again, I don't want my kid smoking weed at 13 or 14, but worst case scenario, he does start smoking weed. 1.00

00:18:12.000 It's not going to be the worst thing.

00:18:13.000 I'm not going to trip out on it. 1.00

00:18:14.000 I'm like, alright, fuck, dude, you're smoking weed. 1.00

00:18:16.000 How long have you been smoking? 1.00

00:18:17.000 I go... 0.99

00:18:18.000 You know, I really think you should fucking cool it or whatever. 0.98

00:18:21.000 But, you know, when he's an adult, we'll be smoking weed together. 0.98

00:18:24.000 Watch.

00:18:27.000 Watch.

00:18:28.000 Oh, we got, wait, we got, we got, we got someone on the line.

00:18:32.000 No.

00:18:32.000 Who's on the line?

00:18:34.000 You have somebody on the line.

00:18:35.000 You know who's on the line.

00:18:37.000 What's up, Hinata?

00:18:38.000 Why are you calling?

00:18:40.000 It's Hinata. 0.98

00:18:41.000 I'm going to speak to, I'm going to speak to, Dude, no one knows what the fuck we're doing here. 0.93

00:18:47.000 Joe, are you going to get an iPhone? 0.96

00:18:49.000 Yeah, are you going to get the new one? 0.97

00:18:51.000 Dude, no one knows what the fuck we're doing. 0.77

00:18:52.000 It's like half a million people and maybe 10,000. 0.95

00:18:55.000 How do you feel about weed, Renato?

00:18:58.000 I'm alive on the air while I'm talking to you.

00:19:01.000 You're alive on the air.

00:19:04.000 So why I'm talking to you while I'm not talking to you?

00:19:06.000 Come on, Eddie.

00:19:08.000 Joe can hear you.

00:19:09.000 Joe's right here.

00:19:09.000 Eddie, I don't want to do this.

00:19:10.000 I don't even know anything about you.

00:19:12.000 I want to just do the podcast.

00:19:13.000 I know how you feel.

00:19:16.000 Eddie.

00:19:17.000 Okay.

00:19:18.000 He's at least...

00:19:19.000 I can talk to that guy.

00:19:20.000 Alright, alright. 0.91

00:19:21.000 We're gonna have to cut you off, man.

00:19:23.000 Joe doesn't want to talk to you.

00:19:24.000 He don't want to talk.

00:19:26.000 No.

00:19:27.000 Eddie, come on, man. 0.97

00:19:30.000 That is the most inside of inside jokes that 99% of the people who listen to this podcast will not have any idea what the fuck that is. 0.88

00:19:38.000 So Apple releases the iPhone 4S today. 0.73

00:19:40.000 And it's not the 5, which everyone's thinking.

00:19:43.000 But remember the 3GS? When the 3G went to the 3GS? And that was a real iPhone.

00:19:48.000 And I think that's what they're doing here.

00:19:50.000 I think there's going to be a 5 maybe around June or so.

00:19:52.000 But this 4S isn't that bad.

00:19:54.000 You're just taking a wild guess.

00:19:56.000 Yeah, that's definitely a guess, but they did it before.

00:20:00.000 The 3GS was a mild upgrade.

00:20:02.000 That's why they never called it the Ford.

00:20:04.000 The 3GS added, what was it?

00:20:06.000 I don't even remember.

00:20:07.000 A better camera?

00:20:08.000 I don't remember.

00:20:08.000 It seemed like there were so many rumors about this.

00:20:11.000 I always feel so pathetic when my life revolves around being really into the next phone that comes out.

00:20:18.000 Right.

00:20:19.000 Well, that new Siri, there's a new intelligent assistant that helps you out, and they did a demo today, which is a thing that you push, and you pretty much ask it any question you want.

00:20:26.000 You could be like, schedule me an appointment at 5 p.m.

00:20:30.000 on Friday, and then it will open up your calendar and go, do you want me to schedule this?

00:20:34.000 And you just say yes.

00:20:35.000 And then we'll schedule it.

00:20:36.000 Or you can go, what's the weather like in New York?

00:20:38.000 And be like, the weather is this.

00:20:40.000 And they showed a bunch of examples.

00:20:42.000 And you can see examples on Apple.com or any of the websites like in Gadget or Gizmodo.

00:20:47.000 But it seems legit.

00:20:49.000 You can even say, like, call Joe.

00:20:51.000 Like the Android stuff, too.

00:20:53.000 It's called Siri.

00:20:54.000 I don't know if that's how it's spelled.

00:20:56.000 And so it's like an assistant.

00:20:57.000 That's the idea?

00:20:58.000 Yeah.

00:20:58.000 Yeah, and it's pretty much the first step into having no interaction with having to touch your phone.

00:21:03.000 So this looks like maybe in five years, you're going to be texting by voice, you're going to be calling.

00:21:09.000 Five years?

00:21:10.000 I would say this is a pretty good step.

00:21:12.000 I wouldn't say it's 100% there right now.

00:21:14.000 I don't think you're still going to use your keyboard on it.

00:21:17.000 Google Voice, the Google app where you use your voice and you say, you know, Tenth Planet Jiu-Jitsu.

00:21:24.000 You just use that as a search.

00:21:25.000 Boom.

00:21:26.000 And it instantly pulls up.

00:21:27.000 I mean, it's really accurate.

00:21:29.000 Like, the way it picks up the things that you're saying, it's super accurate.

00:21:33.000 The thing that they showed today looks even more amazing than that.

00:21:36.000 And they also announced something that we talked about earlier, about an idea I've had since I was a kid. 0.98

00:21:40.000 And now they have it as a feature on the phone, and I'm like, shit. 0.98

00:21:43.000 Should I? They call it, I forget what it's called, but mine was called Snail Mail, where it was where, I don't know if you remember, you would write an email to this company and the company would write it out in hand form and then send it to somebody. 0.80

00:21:55.000 And I originally said, I thought of the idea because I wanted, when my grandmother was still alive, I wanted to be able to email my grandmother, but then have somebody handwrite it and then send it to my grandmother.

00:22:04.000 Well, now they just announced it on this new iPhone that it's a feature, and I forget what they call it, but that's one of the new features now.

00:22:12.000 An actual person?

00:22:14.000 Yeah, I think it's either a handwriting...

00:22:16.000 I don't know if they do it by person.

00:22:17.000 I bet it's a printer that looks like handwriting.

00:22:19.000 That's probably what they do.

00:22:21.000 But that's what the whole thing is.

00:22:22.000 It's $2.99 per letter. 0.68

00:22:24.000 But that's kind of funny that, you know, I should have fucking copyrighted that a long time ago. 0.94

00:22:28.000 That's a bunch of 14-year-old Chinese people. 0.96

00:22:30.000 Yeah, that's all I'm thinking.

00:22:31.000 I'm thinking poor sweatshops of people copying people's signatures.

00:22:36.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:22:36.000 That shit would be horrendous if you found out that that was true. 0.99

00:22:38.000 Right. 1.00

00:22:39.000 I can't imagine that there's really a business for that, but...

00:22:41.000 Yeah, you did come up with that a long time ago.

00:22:43.000 A long time ago.

00:22:44.000 And the camera looks awesome now.

00:22:46.000 They're using a whole new lens system, which is, they're making 8 megapixel, and the HD is 1080p, I believe, is what they said.

00:22:52.000 Do you have to get a new phone, or can we use the same phone?

00:22:54.000 You gotta get a new phone.

00:22:55.000 You gotta get a new phone.

00:22:55.000 For the 4S? The 4S is a new phone.

00:22:59.000 It's also got a dual processor now.

00:23:01.000 They switched to their A5 chip, so now it's supposed to be really fast.

00:23:05.000 So yeah, it is a slight upgrade in some ways.

00:23:08.000 The screen's not any different, but there is a lot of stuff under the hood.

00:23:11.000 Did they improve upon going from apps back to your texting?

00:23:15.000 Sometimes you're just looking at a white screen for 20 seconds.

00:23:19.000 Has that ever happened to your phone?

00:23:20.000 No.

00:23:21.000 Have you cracked your phone before?

00:23:23.000 I got a new phone because I thought it was my phone.

00:23:25.000 Because I kept dropping it.

00:23:27.000 Going from Twitter to my texting, going back to the texting, man, you just gotta sit there and it takes forever to pop up.

00:23:36.000 Do you know how to cancel out the running programs?

00:23:38.000 Do you know how to do that?

00:23:39.000 No.

00:23:40.000 Oh, that's the problem.

00:23:41.000 Yeah, you gotta cancel out your running programs.

00:23:43.000 It's like a computer. 1.00

00:23:44.000 It's really stupid. 1.00

00:23:45.000 It's a stupid fucking design. 1.00

00:23:47.000 But if you press that home button, the button on your screen, you gotta press it twice. 1.00

00:23:51.000 And when it does that, a bunch of icons show up in the bottom of the screen, and you've got to manually go through.

00:23:56.000 You press one of them, you hold it, and it gives you the option to delete it, and then you go through all of them, deleting all of them.

00:24:01.000 And all you're doing is shutting them off. 0.99

00:24:03.000 It's the stupidest thing ever. 1.00

00:24:05.000 It is one of Apple's dumbest, clumsiest fucking designs. 1.00

00:24:08.000 Well, I don't think you're going to have to worry about it too much anymore because this processor is two times faster now, and the graphics are seven times faster. 1.00

00:24:15.000 Yeah, but still the fact that all these applications stay open and running in the background is dumb as fuck. 0.97

00:24:20.000 They're only running the first four. 0.98

00:24:22.000 They might show all of it running, but supposedly none of those other programs are running except the first four.

00:24:27.000 Okay.

00:24:27.000 And then the camera, though, 33% more light.

00:24:32.000 But why isn't it when you shut it off, it's off?

00:24:35.000 Yeah.

00:24:35.000 Because it's called multitasking, so you can go through it back and forth.

00:24:40.000 So it keeps the program running.

00:24:42.000 But it only supposedly, I thought, only kept the first four.

00:24:45.000 It might show all the other programs, but it's only actually using the first four.

00:24:48.000 That is cool, though, because I have had to tweet something that somebody sent me in a text, and then I copy in the text, and I go right back to the tweet, and it's right on the same page.

00:24:56.000 That's exactly where it was, which it wouldn't be if I had to close it and open it every time.

00:25:01.000 That's huge.

00:25:02.000 That's huge.

00:25:02.000 Yeah, that's pretty big.

00:25:03.000 The problem is, going back, like, you're going to have to, before you go to texting, you're going to have to shut everything off.

00:25:09.000 That's probably even slower than just hitting the text and waiting for, like, 20 seconds.

00:25:13.000 Yeah.

00:25:13.000 Right?

00:25:14.000 I mean, they need to work on that, because that's a big fucking problem. 0.99

00:25:17.000 Wait, what did you say? 0.99

00:25:18.000 What was that again?

00:25:20.000 So you've got to turn off these programs so that you don't get that delay going back to the text?

00:25:24.000 No, no, no.

00:25:24.000 That's the processor thing for the most part.

00:25:28.000 I mean you can be running four intensive programs.

00:25:31.000 Like if you had something crazy on like Ustream Broadcast, or I don't even know if that's an intense program, or a video game, that might slow it down a lot.

00:25:37.000 But this is two times faster now, so you probably won't be having that problem if that is the case of those four programs previously.

00:25:43.000 Another thing that's very interesting that this new phone supposedly has is it has two antennas.

00:25:48.000 One antenna that sends, one antenna that receives, instead of it both happening at the same time.

00:25:54.000 So, like, it's supposed to double.

00:25:57.000 I might not be interpreting it exactly correctly, but it's supposed to be able to double the downloads.

00:26:04.000 Yeah, I don't know about the antenna thing.

00:26:05.000 I do know it uses the Verizon antenna, but I didn't see, I'm looking for that right now, what you're talking about.

00:26:09.000 That would make sense.

00:26:10.000 That would be awesome if it had an antenna for both.

00:26:13.000 I read about it.

00:26:13.000 I don't know which one of the websites I read about it, but basically they had duplicated 4G speeds with a 3G device, or what some people consider 4G speeds.

00:26:25.000 Because there's some bunk-ass 4G. If you get that Verizon 4G, that's badass, man.

00:26:30.000 I got one of those laptop cards, man, at the airport.

00:26:33.000 If you're in a place where it's 4G, it's amazing.

00:26:36.000 It's like Wi-Fi.

00:26:37.000 It's like the best Wi-Fi.

00:26:39.000 It's really good.

00:26:40.000 What I want to know, though, is this new version, and it sounds like what you're talking about, this would make sense, is this new version for Verizon, are you going to be able to talk and do data at the same time now?

00:26:50.000 The 4LTE network, you can do that.

00:26:52.000 It's a totally different network.

00:26:53.000 Yeah, but this isn't the LTE network.

00:26:54.000 The 4G, anything that's 4G. All right, so this isn't 4G. That was one of the big things that I think because the network's not ready for iPhone.

00:27:02.000 I think you're right.

00:27:03.000 You know, one thing that I think they need to improve upon, I think if they put...

00:27:09.000 Like a headphone earpiece on each side where you can click it off and it's wireless and you can put it on your...

00:27:15.000 You know what I mean?

00:27:15.000 And then click it back.

00:27:16.000 You always have your headphones with you. 0.99

00:27:17.000 Because so many times I forget to bring my fucking headphones. 1.00

00:27:20.000 You know how many times I buy headphones at the goddamn airport? 1.00

00:27:23.000 If they just had one that clicked on the corners and you could pop it off... 0.98

00:27:27.000 And then you lose it and then your iPhone is...

00:27:29.000 Everyone's going to love lost that in the first week.

00:27:31.000 Whatever.

00:27:32.000 Whatever.

00:27:33.000 It's true. 0.99

00:27:34.000 Or you know where you can pull shit out and then there's a wire? 0.96

00:27:36.000 Even one of those, you know what I mean? 0.95

00:27:38.000 And then you pop it back in.

00:27:39.000 Are you talking about headphones for listening to things or for talking on the phone? 1.00

00:27:43.000 Headphones for listening to shit. 0.99

00:27:44.000 Like videos and stuff. 0.99

00:27:45.000 You're not talking about for talking on the phone.

00:27:46.000 Well then it would work for that too.

00:27:47.000 Why not?

00:27:48.000 Yeah, but I mean, I never use a headphone to talk on the phone.

00:27:51.000 I always hold the phone up to my head.

00:27:53.000 But the more I'm reading about radiation, the more I'm reading about cell phone radiation, the more it really has me thinking.

00:27:59.000 I'm really starting to think, is there really something to that?

00:28:03.000 Because what they accept, like they say, with the acceptable range of radiation you're allowed to have.

00:28:08.000 You know what?

00:28:09.000 This whole time, the wizards were right.

00:28:11.000 Talking on speakerphone outside is the way to go.

00:28:14.000 They're concerned about their... 0.93

00:28:17.000 You just called black people wizards. 0.99

00:28:19.000 Oh, that's hilarious. 0.96

00:28:21.000 They are wizards. 0.99

00:28:21.000 Those black dudes who are really aggressive who talk on their speakerphone and their cell phone. 0.99

00:28:25.000 They're wizards? 0.99

00:28:26.000 They're wizards.

00:28:27.000 They're smart wizards because they're not getting radiation in their head.

00:28:30.000 It's true.

00:28:30.000 All those people that use speakerphone, I'm not saying wizards, but I'm talking about everybody.

00:28:35.000 My ex-girlfriend does it too.

00:28:37.000 All those people that use the speakerphone, they're probably thinking of it that, maybe.

00:28:41.000 Maybe. 0.99

00:28:42.000 You know, when you get to this 4G shit, too. 1.00

00:28:44.000 Now you got some super potent stuff that's flying through the fucking air. 1.00

00:28:48.000 What is all this shit flying through the air, man? 1.00

00:28:50.000 Where's it going? 0.99

00:28:51.000 I mean, how does that interact with our cells?

00:28:53.000 The fact that all these different Wi-Fi signals and, you know...

00:28:56.000 Dude, if we could put on one of those infrared goggles, but you could see...

00:29:03.000 signal and the information coming through if you could just see everything you know what i mean we're in a sea of like frequencies who the fuck knows what that actually looks like someone knows how it works like who the fuck figured out how a cell phone works you know what i mean now we're sending video through the air someone figured out that there was like some tracks that we could put I'm like, Jesus, that's magic.

00:29:30.000 And when you're in a place that has nothing, there's a certain sound to the silence, like of the mountains.

00:29:37.000 There's a certain sound where it's almost like...

00:29:40.000 All around us isn't really a sound, but just a very low frequency that we can't tune into.

00:29:47.000 Imagine if it just affects your everyday consciousness.

00:29:49.000 You just don't realize it. 0.89

00:29:51.000 If your everyday consciousness is just slightly pressured by all of these vibrations that are around you all the time, all these cell phone signals and fucking Wi-Fi signals and satellite signals and radio signals and... 1.00

00:30:06.000 Fuck. 1.00

00:30:06.000 Imagine if that is really fucking with our personalities. 1.00

00:30:09.000 Imagine if you'd be a different person, or at least... 0.99

00:30:11.000 ADD. Feel different.

00:30:13.000 Yeah, ADD. Who knows?

00:30:14.000 Who knows how many different things?

00:30:16.000 Who knows? 1.00

00:30:18.000 I wonder what all this shit is doing to us. 1.00

00:30:20.000 It's only been around for a few... 1.00

00:30:21.000 How long?

00:30:23.000 It started with TV signals and radio signals.

00:30:25.000 Radio first, then TV. But within the last couple decades, the amount of infiltration in our lives by frequencies and signals...

00:30:35.000 Just walkie-talkies, man. 0.99

00:30:37.000 How the fuck did they figure out walkie-talkies? 0.99

00:30:40.000 You know what I mean? 0.99

00:30:41.000 Right.

00:30:41.000 That's amazing!

00:30:43.000 A walkie-talkie is fucking crazy! 0.99

00:30:45.000 Well, they used to be able to send things and they weren't encoded either. 0.99

00:30:48.000 They would have to manually encode their information because they didn't want people... 0.98

00:30:53.000 The enemy was tuning into their shit too. 0.99

00:30:55.000 So everybody had to talk in code. 1.00

00:30:57.000 Wrap your head around that.

00:30:58.000 Not only is there no email, but when you send some signal out, anybody can get that signal.

00:31:04.000 So you're in the bottom of the submarine.

00:31:06.000 The Japanese are listening. 1.00

00:31:09.000 They hear your fucking signal. 1.00

00:31:11.000 You can't just send it just to you. 1.00

00:31:13.000 You know what's crazy?

00:31:14.000 As technology just snowballs, the more access we have to instant information, like infinite information, the more free we feel, the more we can keep track of. 1.00

00:31:27.000 When you watch CSI, shit! 0.99

00:31:29.000 Every move you make, they can just break it down from your cell phones. 1.00

00:31:34.000 They know what cell phone tower you hit.

00:31:35.000 They know exactly where you were from the cell phone towers. 0.98

00:31:38.000 They can go back and all the deleted messages that you, all shit you deleted, they can go back and retrieve them. 0.98

00:31:44.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:31:44.000 Like there's some kind of imprint of this shit somewhere. 0.99

00:31:46.000 Like, holy fuck. 1.00

00:31:48.000 We think like, oh, we're more powerful, more connected. 1.00

00:31:51.000 We're more under control more than anything, you know?

00:31:54.000 Every little move we make, they know exactly. 0.99

00:31:57.000 If they needed to pinpoint somebody, how easy it is to fucking find somebody. 0.99

00:32:00.000 You're going to live off the grid? 0.99

00:32:01.000 How long is that going to last?

00:32:03.000 You better go to the Amazon jungle, you know what I mean? 0.84

00:32:06.000 That's the only place you're going to survive.

00:32:07.000 They'll find you.

00:32:08.000 Well, certainly the connection is much more immersive than it's ever been before.

00:32:12.000 There's never been at any point in time where people are so easy to get in contact with other people.

00:32:18.000 Yeah, it's incredible.

00:32:20.000 Did you hear about that guy around your neighborhood?

00:32:23.000 He flew off the side of a cliff, and there wasn't cell phone service there, so he couldn't use his cell phone.

00:32:29.000 And he got in a car accident with another person or something like that, and then both of their cars are down there.

00:32:34.000 The other guy died.

00:32:36.000 And so his body was like, you know, everywhere.

00:32:38.000 And he broke like every single bone in his body, was still alive, and tried to crawl out, but he couldn't move because everything was broken.

00:32:46.000 And for 10 days, he sat down there with this dead guy living off of grass and bugs.

00:32:52.000 And there was like a little creek water, I guess he would drink.

00:32:56.000 But for 10 days, he lived there.

00:32:57.000 And then one day his son or something like that was going down the road looking.

00:33:01.000 They're still kind of looking for him and stuff.

00:33:03.000 And he heard his dad yell for help, and they found his body.

00:33:07.000 But he didn't have cell phone service there.

00:33:09.000 And if he would have been able to – he said the whole time he was just searching his cell phone, and his cell phone died and stuff.

00:33:14.000 But can you imagine 10 days on the bottom of a creek and there's not cell phone service? 0.84

00:33:19.000 And he was just all fucked up so he couldn't walk out of there? 0.99

00:33:22.000 Yeah, but he's alive now and he's recovering and everything. 0.99

00:33:25.000 But imagine being 10 days around a dead person, too.

00:33:29.000 Well, it's also just...

00:33:30.000 You think of, A, how vulnerable your body is.

00:33:33.000 And if your body breaks, you're just stuck.

00:33:35.000 You can't move.

00:33:36.000 I don't think...

00:33:37.000 Most of us don't wrap our heads around that.

00:33:39.000 Your body breaks and then you can't move.

00:33:41.000 And then being out in the woods.

00:33:42.000 So you get two things that scare the fuck out of people.

00:33:45.000 Being alone out in the uncharted...

00:33:49.000 You're just hearing cars driving by you, above you, every day.

00:33:52.000 It's all it has to be.

00:33:53.000 It's just the side of the roads, you know, some area that people drive by every day.

00:33:58.000 That might as well be uncharted wilderness.

00:34:00.000 Nobody goes by.

00:34:00.000 Yeah, they said that people fly off of those cliffs all the time and never get found.

00:34:06.000 Because it's just like, who goes down there?

00:34:08.000 No one goes down there.

00:34:08.000 Nobody goes looking.

00:34:09.000 They find cars down there all the time.

00:34:11.000 Yeah.

00:34:12.000 Yeah, that's a scary thing, man.

00:34:14.000 That's the...

00:34:15.000 Cliff driving.

00:34:15.000 You ever do the Pacific Coast high?

00:34:17.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:34:17.000 Pacific Coast all the way up to Monterey?

00:34:19.000 Not all the way up.

00:34:20.000 Ooh, that's scary. 0.99

00:34:21.000 It's beautiful as fuck. 0.99

00:34:22.000 The first time I did it, I was 28 years old and I never took that drive. 0.99

00:34:27.000 I was like, I live in California and I never knew that it was one of the most beautiful states ever.

00:34:33.000 Yeah.

00:34:34.000 Incredible scenery.

00:34:36.000 The cliffs and the rocks.

00:34:38.000 It's so hard to even wrap your head around it.

00:34:40.000 It's magnificent.

00:34:41.000 I kept pulling over.

00:34:42.000 The girl I was with, we took a little trip for a couple days.

00:34:46.000 I kept pulling over just videotaping.

00:34:48.000 I couldn't believe this was California. 1.00

00:34:50.000 I'm like, holy shit. 0.99

00:34:51.000 I've never been up to Northern California before. 0.98

00:34:54.000 On the coast. 0.99

00:34:54.000 There's a lot of parts of that fucking drive where you're just counting on the other asshole on the other side to just be cool. 0.99

00:35:00.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:35:01.000 Keep it together. 1.00

00:35:01.000 Stay in your fucking lane. 1.00

00:35:02.000 Don't be texting. 1.00

00:35:03.000 Isn't it crazy how they put a big halt to that satellite phone?

00:35:06.000 Remember?

00:35:07.000 It was big like six, seven years ago.

00:35:08.000 It was like the future. 0.99

00:35:10.000 And the commercial was, dude was in the wilderness on a mountain and he was making a call like, this is the best shit. 0.99

00:35:16.000 And then boom, they just shut it all down. 0.99

00:35:18.000 No, they have satellite phones.

00:35:20.000 How come it didn't blow up?

00:35:21.000 Oh no, it's just not that efficient.

00:35:23.000 You have a world phone now.

00:35:25.000 Didn't they shut down the satellite phones because of the whole terrorism thing?

00:35:29.000 I think they briefly shut them down around that time period, but I think they still have them.

00:35:34.000 Somebody had a satellite phone the other day.

00:35:37.000 Oh wait, that was lost.

00:35:39.000 I think they use them on a set of Fear Factor if we're in a tricky situation. 0.96

00:35:44.000 Wouldn't that blow the fuck up?

00:35:45.000 I know we used to. 0.65

00:35:45.000 We used to use them all the time. 0.65

00:35:47.000 We used to have to use satellite phones.

00:35:49.000 There were certain sets that we'd be on, but there was nothing.

00:35:51.000 You would think that would be huge.

00:35:53.000 I thought they got shut down.

00:35:55.000 Where's the commercials?

00:35:56.000 I think it's expensive.

00:35:57.000 I don't think the sound quality is that good either.

00:35:59.000 There's a big delay.

00:36:01.000 I shouldn't say a big delay. 0.92

00:36:03.000 It's fucking amazing. 0.96

00:36:04.000 It goes up to the sky and then back down. 0.99

00:36:06.000 They should have regular phones with fucking 9G. You've got the satellite if you need it. 0.98

00:36:12.000 You just click on the little thing just in case. 0.99

00:36:14.000 These stories flying off cliffs and shit, getting lost in the woods. 0.98

00:36:18.000 How many movies have someone getting chased... 1.00

00:36:20.000 And their cell phone signal sucks.

00:36:22.000 Well, now it's a good idea because now the chips are slowly shrinking to the point where you could get all that in one phone. 0.64

00:36:30.000 But if you ever look at the satellite phones, there's a reason why they're big, giant bricks.

00:36:34.000 I mean, the receiver has to be completely different than a little tiny one that's in a phone.

00:36:37.000 That's got to be the new pimp floss thing.

00:36:39.000 It's also, nowadays, cars have it built in.

00:36:42.000 Like, my car has a feature in it that you can turn on that if I get in a car accident, it automatically detects my GPS and sends it and calls 911 for me.

00:36:50.000 Yeah, Ford does that, right?

00:36:51.000 Yeah, Ford Sync. 0.85

00:36:52.000 Somebody told me this, and I don't know if it's true, so Twitter people fucking inform me.

00:36:57.000 Tell me if this is true.

00:36:58.000 Somebody said that a dude bought a Corvette and it had that, what is that, the thing, the OnStar system?

00:37:04.000 Yeah.

00:37:04.000 OnStar?

00:37:05.000 Guy was going down the highway going 148 miles an hour or something crazy like that.

00:37:09.000 OnStar shut off his car and called the police.

00:37:12.000 No, that's not true.

00:37:13.000 You sure that's not true?

00:37:14.000 100%, that's not true.

00:37:15.000 No way that OnStar even is monitoring how fast you're driving or doing anything like that.

00:37:19.000 I thought it saves information if you're in a wreck that can find out that you're speeding.

00:37:24.000 It might save it, but there's so many cars that have OnStar and the fact that they actually have people sitting there going, alright, he's going 120 over here.

00:37:30.000 There's no one monitoring that unless you get in a car accident.

00:37:33.000 Maybe it's the program itself.

00:37:35.000 Maybe OnStar itself, when it recognizes that you hit a certain amount of miles per hour, they shut your car off.

00:37:40.000 You don't think that's possible?

00:37:42.000 Well, I know it's possible that they could shut it off if someone's driving it, right?

00:37:46.000 Can't they shut it off?

00:37:47.000 Yeah, what's that called?

00:37:48.000 Jack something Jack?

00:37:50.000 I don't know.

00:37:51.000 I think they've done that to crooks.

00:37:52.000 Haven't they done that to people before?

00:37:54.000 Shut their cars off while they're driving it?

00:37:55.000 It seems like they have.

00:37:56.000 I don't know.

00:37:57.000 Maybe I'm making this up.

00:37:57.000 That was from Steal a Car.

00:37:59.000 That was that one reality show where people steal cars.

00:38:02.000 Oh, yeah, yeah.

00:38:02.000 That's what I'm thinking of.

00:38:04.000 But you know, the way things are going...

00:38:06.000 Ultimately, it looks like...

00:38:09.000 I don't know.

00:38:11.000 I could be wrong, but it looks like...

00:38:13.000 Like it's just going to be mandatory. 1.00

00:38:15.000 It's going to be law that the CHP or the police department or whatever the fuck they call the force back then has GPS on your shit. 0.99

00:38:23.000 And like the DMV. 0.99

00:38:24.000 And they just monitor every mile you drive. 0.97

00:38:27.000 So anytime you fuck up, they just send you tickets. 0.98

00:38:29.000 They go, we have your GPS fingerprint. 0.99

00:38:31.000 Your GPS record. 1.00

00:38:33.000 Can you imagine that shit? 1.00

00:38:35.000 Fuck them cameras. 1.00

00:38:36.000 Like in England, they got cameras, they got, you know, that they take pictures, but they're not going to need that. 1.00

00:38:40.000 The DMV is just going to monitor your driving.

00:38:43.000 Every day you'll have a sheet.

00:38:44.000 Oh, he broke, you know, there's a ticket, here's a ticket, boom.

00:38:47.000 No more hiding.

00:38:48.000 Yeah, no more speeding.

00:38:52.000 You have to go to a track if you want to go fast.

00:38:55.000 There'll be spots like that.

00:38:58.000 Sometimes speed limit's ridiculous.

00:39:00.000 For the most part, speed limit's probably pretty smart to have a decent number set in a lot of places. 0.91

00:39:07.000 But there's a lot of places where it's silly.

00:39:09.000 Like the highway. 0.99

00:39:10.000 Get the fuck out of here. 1.00

00:39:12.000 When you see 55 miles an hour, get the fuck out of here. 1.00

00:39:15.000 That's stupid. 1.00

00:39:16.000 That's a stupid way to move. 1.00

00:39:18.000 55 miles an hour, what kind of car do you have? 1.00

00:39:20.000 Maybe if you're a fucking old jalopy back when they instituted that speed limit, it made sense. 1.00

00:39:25.000 Because if you were going more than 55 miles an hour in an old fucking Chevy Nova, one of those six-cylinder shitboxes, those brakes suck, dude. 0.99

00:39:34.000 If you were actually going fast in one of those cars, I mean, they're awesome cars when people rebuild them, don't get me wrong, but I mean... 0.98

00:39:41.000 Compared to today's technology, the technology of those cars, they couldn't handle well and they couldn't brake well.

00:39:46.000 I have nightmares where I can't...

00:39:47.000 You have nightmares where you're braking the car and you're braking.

00:39:49.000 It's not working.

00:39:50.000 You're just like slamming on the brakes.

00:39:52.000 That's scary.

00:39:52.000 That's a common nightmare.

00:39:53.000 That's why we need to move to Texas.

00:39:54.000 I heard that they're voting to get the speed limit moved to 90, I think is what they were saying.

00:40:00.000 Something crazy.

00:40:00.000 Maybe it was 80, but...

00:40:02.000 There's a lot of parts of Texas I fucking love. 0.97

00:40:04.000 Oh, speaking of which, I'm in Texas this weekend. 0.98

00:40:07.000 Powerful Verizon Center this Friday night.

00:40:10.000 And you haven't been to Houston in so long.

00:40:11.000 You used to own Houston.

00:40:13.000 Every time you went in the town, you would sell...

00:40:15.000 Houston owned me.

00:40:16.000 No, I know, but you would sell out every single show.

00:40:18.000 That was the biggest market, and then they closed the comedy club that we loved to go to.

00:40:22.000 Went to the second comedy club.

00:40:23.000 Remember our boy in Houston?

00:40:25.000 I don't want to say his name, but remember our boy in Houston?

00:40:28.000 He came out on the road with us.

00:40:32.000 Red Devil.

00:40:34.000 Oh, when he was in Houston.

00:40:36.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:40:37.000 Red Devil.

00:40:38.000 Houston is...

00:40:39.000 He never came on the road with us.

00:40:41.000 We were always going on the road. 0.99

00:40:42.000 This is a subject that no one's going to know what the fuck we're talking about. 0.97

00:40:45.000 Yeah, that's why you explain it. 0.97

00:40:47.000 There's a mic.

00:40:47.000 We've got three hours.

00:40:49.000 But anyways...

00:40:49.000 Is it Toyota Center or Verizon Center?

00:40:54.000 Verizon Center is where the stand-up is.

00:40:55.000 Yeah.

00:40:57.000 Yeah. 0.78

00:40:57.000 You were on a radio station there the other day, and you said that that radio was pretty ridiculous. 0.78

00:41:02.000 They were nice.

00:41:03.000 They were cool.

00:41:03.000 They played that Voodoo Poonani song.

00:41:05.000 Yeah, they play your song all the time.

00:41:07.000 Yeah, he was just quoting a bit that I did.

00:41:09.000 I was like, what are you talking about?

00:41:10.000 I don't even know that bit. 0.97

00:41:11.000 But now, after I got off the phone with him, I was like, damn, I think he was right.

00:41:14.000 I think that is a line in one of my old bits that I forgot.

00:41:17.000 Because he was talking something about a toe ring.

00:41:19.000 I'm like, I don't have a joke about a toe ring.

00:41:20.000 And he goes, yeah, you do.

00:41:21.000 And I'm like, are you high or drunk?

00:41:23.000 I don't remember a joke about it.

00:41:24.000 I think it's a line in one of my old, old jokes. 0.85

00:41:29.000 I've played back my shit from 1999, and it's almost as if it's someone else's material. 0.92

00:41:35.000 I don't even know it anymore. 0.94

00:41:36.000 I mean, I remember it.

00:41:38.000 Yeah, that was one of my jokes.

00:41:39.000 But I don't even know them anymore. 0.97

00:41:40.000 So if somebody quotes a little piece of it, I might not even know what the fuck they're talking about. 0.81

00:41:45.000 It seems so weird for something that for years you're so intimately connected to. 0.98

00:41:49.000 But when you have material and then you abandon it and start on some new material, you fucking forget everything.

00:41:54.000 Dude, when you started smoking weed, what was it, 32? 0.93

00:41:56.000 Something like that, 31 or 32. You went from like pure dick jokes and relationship jokes and chick jokes and cock-blocking jokes and then right into your pyramid bit. 0.99

00:42:07.000 You started smoking weed, you went into the pyramid bit. 1.00

00:42:10.000 Dumb people are out fucking smart people at a staggering pace. 1.00

00:42:14.000 White Doritos are so funny. 1.00

00:42:18.000 Yeah, it changed my comedy for sure.

00:42:20.000 Weed made a complete turn in my comedy.

00:42:25.000 You know, it's like I just kind of learn to see things differently, you know?

00:42:30.000 You had some good classics before we, though.

00:42:32.000 Yeah, for sure. 0.99

00:42:32.000 The fucking Tiger bit. 0.99

00:42:34.000 The Tiger bit. 1.00

00:42:34.000 How many times have I been on the road and I just wanted to hear the Tiger? 1.00

00:42:37.000 I heard it like a thousand times and I'm always like, Tiger! 1.00

00:42:41.000 You're like, shut up, motherfucker. 1.00

00:42:42.000 That was one of those bits that was so hard to let go. 1.00

00:42:45.000 Tiger was the ultimate bit.

00:42:47.000 I'll never get tired of that one.

00:42:48.000 I had to let it go, though.

00:42:49.000 Whenever you've got new material, you can't keep remembering the old material.

00:42:53.000 I really don't remember exactly how it goes.

00:42:55.000 Can I get a little Tiger sound?

00:42:56.000 Just give me a little... 0.99

00:42:58.000 That's fucking so real! 0.99

00:43:06.000 Roar. 0.99

00:43:07.000 That was not the...

00:43:10.000 That's more of a bear.

00:43:12.000 I can do a bear.

00:43:13.000 I can't do a tiger.

00:43:14.000 Remember you had a bear joke too?

00:43:15.000 What was that?

00:43:16.000 Remember when the bear attacked the karate trainer? 0.87

00:43:18.000 There was a guy who was a trainer and he's dressed in a karate outfit and he had a lady come on stage with him and the lady sat in the chair and the bear turned and looked at the lady and just started fucking her up. 0.98

00:43:30.000 Just started fucking her up. 0.96

00:43:31.000 But it was just like the bear just woke up and realized... 1.00

00:43:35.000 I'm a fucking bear! 1.00

00:43:36.000 And then he just starts wailing. 1.00

00:43:38.000 Like, out of nowhere, the dude had a karate outfit.

00:43:40.000 He was trying to protect the guy.

00:43:42.000 Is that on YouTube?

00:43:43.000 That was way before YouTube.

00:43:45.000 The bit?

00:43:45.000 No, no, no, no.

00:43:46.000 The story?

00:43:47.000 The actual story.

00:43:48.000 The actual video?

00:43:48.000 Yeah, I bet somebody put it online.

00:43:50.000 Damn. 0.99

00:43:51.000 I would like to see. 0.99

00:43:52.000 Because I heard it so much.

00:43:53.000 I heard that joke so much.

00:43:55.000 It's crazy.

00:43:56.000 I've never actually seen the real footage of it. 0.99

00:43:58.000 The bear just turns to this lady and starts fucking her up for no reason. 1.00

00:44:01.000 She sat down. 0.99

00:44:03.000 That's the weirdest thing about animals, man.

00:44:04.000 Sometimes you don't realize, but like trained animals, sometimes they're just tweaked.

00:44:10.000 Like, they're tired of this.

00:44:11.000 They don't want to do this anymore. 1.00

00:44:12.000 It's just stupid. 1.00

00:44:13.000 I don't want to be led around. 1.00

00:44:14.000 Why are you fucking with me? 0.99

00:44:15.000 What's going on here? 1.00

00:44:17.000 And then it looks normal because they do it every day and they don't know how to communicate.

00:44:21.000 But they're a little tweaked. 0.99

00:44:23.000 And so they sit down and a fucking lady sits right now next to them. 1.00

00:44:26.000 And he just decides to fuck her up out of nowhere. 1.00

00:44:29.000 And it looks like it's out of nowhere. 1.00

00:44:30.000 But it's been built up all day because you've got this fucking stupid bear doing somersaults. 1.00

00:44:35.000 You know, you got this bear, you know? 1.00

00:44:37.000 Instead of killing deers and eating berries and shit, this bear is running around on chairs, you know, playing musical chairs. 1.00

00:44:46.000 What the fuck are you doing, man? 1.00

00:44:47.000 That's a big, crazy, unpredictable animal. 1.00

00:44:51.000 There's a video of a dude who was training a bear, and he was training it with, I believe it was his brother or his cousin, someone who was a close family member.

00:44:58.000 I think it was his brother.

00:44:59.000 And the bear just turns on the guy for no reason and rips his throat out.

00:45:05.000 It happens in 30, not even 30 seconds, 10 seconds, maybe, maximum, for no reason.

00:45:12.000 They're all, had this bear in this room, the bear just turns on the guy, goes right at his neck and rips it out.

00:45:18.000 And the guy bled out and died right there.

00:45:20.000 Isn't it crazy that when these trained animals, a lot of them, when they attack, they don't kill them because it's like they give them another chance.

00:45:29.000 Like the killer whale.

00:45:30.000 Didn't they give that killer whale a couple chances?

00:45:32.000 This bear.

00:45:33.000 They didn't kill this bear.

00:45:34.000 Why?

00:45:35.000 It just seems like it costs more money to retrain another bear than to pay the insurance policy on it.

00:45:40.000 You know what I mean?

00:45:41.000 It's got to be what it is.

00:45:43.000 I don't know.

00:45:44.000 I don't get it.

00:45:46.000 I don't get it. 0.81

00:45:47.000 I don't understand how anybody can convince anybody that a bear that has already killed a person who offered no threat whatsoever, that thing, if a person did that, you would kill them. 0.98

00:45:58.000 You would give them the death penalty. 0.99

00:46:00.000 In a right society, if you saw someone run up to someone for no reason and rip their throat out, you would kill them. 1.00

00:46:06.000 Why the fuck would you give a bear more rights than you give a Maybe not kill the bear because I don't blame the bear for doing that, but lock him away somewhere or something. 1.00

00:46:18.000 Don't continue to use him as a buffoon. 1.00

00:46:21.000 He's going to attack again. 0.99

00:46:22.000 I would think locking a bear away would be cruel and unusual punishment. 1.00

00:46:25.000 I'd say just put one in his fucking dome. 1.00

00:46:27.000 Release him in the wild. 1.00

00:46:29.000 Fuck it. 1.00

00:46:29.000 Give him a chance. 1.00

00:46:30.000 A bear that you take and you train and you do all that with and then it turns and eats your brother's fucking throat in front of you, you're supposed to kill that thing. 1.00

00:46:37.000 That crazy wild thing that you thought you were in control of. 1.00

00:46:40.000 The fuck is wrong with that? 1.00

00:46:41.000 If it was up to me, I would take him up to the mountains and give him a chance. 1.00

00:46:44.000 Let him loose?

00:46:45.000 No survival skills or anything.

00:46:47.000 Good luck.

00:46:48.000 But at least you give him a chance.

00:46:49.000 Who knows?

00:46:50.000 Maybe they can make it.

00:46:51.000 Maybe, but they'll probably die. 0.64

00:46:53.000 That's a terrible idea because then you set an animal loose that's used to being in contact with human beings and you set him out in the woods and he will find human beings.

00:47:00.000 And it poses a direct threat to those people.

00:47:02.000 They're really dangerous.

00:47:03.000 Once you have habitualized a bear...

00:47:06.000 To people, they have to lock them up.

00:47:08.000 They have to put them in cages and zoos.

00:47:10.000 The zoos that we went to in Colorado, I learned that there.

00:47:12.000 Because they had these bears and these bears had gotten, they're big ass grizzlies, man. 0.80

00:47:16.000 Big ass brown bears. 0.99

00:47:17.000 And they were getting into people's garbage. 0.96

00:47:20.000 And once they find this is where the people keep the food, it's a source of food, they won't go away.

00:47:24.000 You can't scare them. 1.00

00:47:25.000 At a certain point in time, they just get used to you and they just fuck you. 1.00

00:47:29.000 So unless you shoot them, they have to have someone come and capture them and they take them away. 1.00

00:47:34.000 You can't just let that bear lose. 1.00

00:47:36.000 If you let that bear lose, he would find people and fuck them up. 1.00

00:47:38.000 I remember that one time I did five grams of mushrooms and I went to the zoo. 1.00

00:47:43.000 I thought it'd be a great idea.

00:47:44.000 And by the time I got to the zoo, that's when it started kicking in.

00:47:47.000 I blew up at the zoo.

00:47:49.000 That freaked me out. 1.00

00:47:50.000 I'm like, fuck, these animals are fucking sad as hell. 1.00

00:47:53.000 They're all captured. 1.00

00:47:54.000 They're imprisoned. 1.00

00:47:55.000 I ran out of that goddamn zoo. 1.00

00:47:59.000 That's how those people was jumping into the polar bear cages. 1.00

00:48:03.000 They're always on shrooms or some kind of drill.

00:48:06.000 The polar bear was... 0.98

00:48:07.000 It's like a little fucking old school little auditorium theater thing that you got for this polar bear. 0.98

00:48:13.000 And there's a door backstage. 0.98

00:48:15.000 And it just kept walking to that door.

00:48:17.000 And then it would walk away from the door a couple yards.

00:48:19.000 And walking back, waiting for someone to open that door.

00:48:22.000 It was just pacing back and forth non-stop, this polar bear.

00:48:26.000 I'm like, wow, I freaked the fuck out. 1.00

00:48:28.000 He's just hoping that some asshole comes and opens the door and he can bite him and drag him in there and finish him off. 1.00

00:48:35.000 That's what they're doing. 1.00

00:48:36.000 They're just dying for someone to go in there so they can jack him. 1.00

00:48:39.000 Crazy shit. 1.00

00:48:40.000 You ever seen the video of the lady getting her leg broken? 1.00

00:48:43.000 He bites down on her leg and he's pulling her leg through the fucking bars? 1.00

00:48:48.000 Polar bears are motherfuckers, man. 1.00

00:48:51.000 They're real motherfuckers. 1.00

00:48:52.000 And you don't ever really tame those things. 1.00

00:48:55.000 Those things, they're the craziest bears of all because they're the straight carnivore bears.

00:48:59.000 All the other bears eat fruits and berries. 0.99

00:49:01.000 There's no fucking fruits and berries where the polar bear lives. 0.99

00:49:04.000 Just Coca-Cola. 1.00

00:49:05.000 Just seals and people and whatever the fuck else he can eat. 0.99

00:49:10.000 Whales. 0.89

00:49:11.000 They eat whales.

00:49:12.000 They find a hole where a whale got stuck under a giant sheet of ice and the whale can't go anywhere.

00:49:17.000 So every time the whale comes up to get some air, boom, polar bear jacks him.

00:49:21.000 Takes a bite out of him.

00:49:22.000 So these whales, like you see them, and after a while, the top of their back is just destroyed from polar bears just biting them over and over and over and over again.

00:49:33.000 And then eventually they kill it.

00:49:34.000 So a small whale or something like that, they get stuck in there, a pilot whale, they just slowly bite them to death.

00:49:41.000 It's incredible.

00:49:42.000 Did you see the video of the mariachi band playing music for, I think it was a, what are those, snow lions or something like that?

00:49:52.000 Snow leopards?

00:49:53.000 There's big things.

00:49:54.000 There's big blobby, they almost look like hippos.

00:49:57.000 What's the ones that are all seals?

00:49:59.000 Walruses?

00:50:00.000 Sea lions?

00:50:02.000 Maybe that.

00:50:03.000 But it was so cool.

00:50:05.000 It looked like it was having a fun time watching.

00:50:09.000 It was going back and forth.

00:50:10.000 Explain what you saw.

00:50:11.000 Okay, here.

00:50:11.000 I'll show it to you.

00:50:13.000 I think it's on Google.

00:50:14.000 Mariachi band.

00:50:16.000 Mariachi band.

00:50:18.000 Sea Lion.

00:50:20.000 Maybe.

00:50:20.000 So they're playing the music and the sea lion's dancing along with it?

00:50:23.000 Is that what you're saying?

00:50:24.000 Yeah, it's amazing.

00:50:26.000 And one of the trumpet players would go...

00:50:28.000 And tilt his head up and down.

00:50:31.000 And then it would tilt its head up and down.

00:50:33.000 And it just looked like it was having the time of its life.

00:50:36.000 It's one of the coolest videos I've seen.

00:50:37.000 I'll find it right now.

00:50:38.000 I always wonder what kind of an effect music would have on animals.

00:50:43.000 Because, you know, in the animal kingdom...

00:50:45.000 It's actually a beluga whale.

00:50:46.000 No communication at all.

00:50:47.000 But why wouldn't music...

00:50:49.000 Impact them the same way it impacts us.

00:50:51.000 Why wouldn't it be exciting and interesting to them?

00:50:54.000 It's actually a beluga whale, and if you look at it, it's on break.com.

00:51:00.000 It's mariachi band serenades a beluga whale.

00:51:03.000 And it's just going back and forth.

00:51:06.000 Well, that makes sense, because whales are way smarter than sea lions.

00:51:10.000 And I start...

00:51:11.000 It is...

00:51:13.000 You thought that was a sea lion?

00:51:15.000 I couldn't remember what it was.

00:51:21.000 And they start playing more and more, and it starts really nodding its head.

00:51:25.000 You know what's interesting about this?

00:51:27.000 That we're amazed that this is intelligent.

00:51:30.000 Because if that was a person, and if you're like, look at my boy.

00:51:33.000 I took my boy to see the mariachi band.

00:51:36.000 Look how my boy nods.

00:51:38.000 He nods.

00:51:39.000 He acknowledges them.

00:51:40.000 They acknowledge him back.

00:51:42.000 Right.

00:51:42.000 My boy's brilliant.

00:51:44.000 So far he's not really doing anything significant.

00:51:47.000 Does it get better?

00:51:48.000 The only reason why this is interesting is because it's not a human. 1.00

00:51:52.000 If it's a person, that's a drooling idiot listening to bad music. 1.00

00:51:59.000 Okay. 1.00

00:52:00.000 Wait, let me see him get to the good part. 0.99

00:52:05.000 Right now he's just going, what the fuck are those hats? 0.99

00:52:08.000 Well, before they were nodding with the music and stuff like that. 0.99

00:52:12.000 I mean, it's kind of cute.

00:52:14.000 I'm not saying it's like a breakthrough in science or anything.

00:52:17.000 It's just a cool video to watch.

00:52:18.000 I think you were saying it was a breakthrough in science.

00:52:20.000 I think that dolphin's like, you guys got fish or something?

00:52:24.000 What's going on? 0.99

00:52:25.000 Yeah, I think he's bored as fuck. 1.00

00:52:27.000 Trapped in jail. 0.99

00:52:28.000 Is it snack time?

00:52:29.000 What's going on?

00:52:30.000 People are filming him.

00:52:31.000 Nachos? 1.00

00:52:31.000 Assholes make weird music. 1.00

00:52:33.000 Yeah, poor thing. 1.00

00:52:34.000 He's in jail, man.

00:52:35.000 That thing's in jail. 0.99

00:52:37.000 No wonder. 1.00

00:52:37.000 He'll fucking stare at you when you come to the glass. 1.00

00:52:39.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:52:40.000 Wow, amazing.

00:52:40.000 Are you going to let me go?

00:52:41.000 Is it today, Freedom Day?

00:52:44.000 That's the thing that we have to be the most concerned about with aliens, man. 0.98

00:52:47.000 Because think of the disrespect that we have for everything even remotely dumber than us.

00:52:52.000 Even whales, like killer whales, orcas, dolphins, those are thought to be really intelligent animals.

00:52:58.000 We don't totally understand their languages. 0.96

00:53:00.000 We know that they have, like some of them have dialects and shit. 0.99

00:53:03.000 They're really complicated, both killer whales and dolphins. 0.93

00:53:06.000 They're like cousins of each other.

00:53:07.000 But we don't understand what they say. 0.99

00:53:09.000 So we're like, I don't give a fuck. 1.00

00:53:11.000 Get in the tank. 1.00

00:53:12.000 And we just force them into prison for us.

00:53:15.000 And we all go watch them perform and fly through the air and splash as everybody claps.

00:53:21.000 We're watching slaves.

00:53:23.000 We're watching babies that were stolen from their mothers, from intelligent animals that miss them.

00:53:28.000 And we don't care because we don't understand what they're saying.

00:53:30.000 La la la, not listening! 0.93

00:53:32.000 What's the latest on deciphering the dolphin or whale language?

00:53:36.000 I mean, because we're trying to teach them our words, like jump, trick.

00:53:38.000 That's the crazy thing.

00:53:40.000 They can recognize many, many human words.

00:53:42.000 Yes.

00:53:42.000 But we can't understand a single thing that they're saying.

00:53:45.000 There's got to be someone on the case trying to decipher that shit. 0.99

00:53:47.000 Well, that's what Timothy Leary was doing. 0.99

00:53:49.000 Oh, not Timothy Leary, rather.

00:53:50.000 The guy who created the isolation tank. 0.99

00:53:53.000 God damn it. 1.00

00:53:54.000 Is there some new shit with the isolation tank where they're sending radio waves through it now? 1.00

00:53:58.000 Is that the latest thing? 0.98

00:53:59.000 Or is it still you laying in water at a certain temperature? 0.98

00:54:01.000 Or is there some electromagnetic shit going on now? 0.97

00:54:04.000 Well, they do have some where they play sound. 0.96

00:54:09.000 Float Lab has got some crazy new video screen that they're developing.

00:54:14.000 Where it sits right in front of you and has the lowest possible emission of light so that you don't see the machinery at all.

00:54:21.000 All you see is the image that's being played on this DVD because you're in total complete darkness in there.

00:54:26.000 And the speakers are these sort of underwater, waterproof speakers that are beside each ear.

00:54:32.000 They're fixed in place.

00:54:33.000 So you set yourself in between these two speakers and then this video plays. 0.96

00:54:37.000 And in the sensory deprivation environment, When you're in there, you are weightless and bodiless and you don't feel shit.

00:54:44.000 You feel like you're flying through the universe and then all of a sudden this image appears right before you and the sound is to the side of you.

00:54:50.000 It sounds pretty dope.

00:54:51.000 I haven't tried it though.

00:54:52.000 I like going in there and just...

00:54:55.000 I don't want to...

00:54:55.000 I'm not looking to add anything.

00:54:57.000 I'm looking to figure out what the fuck is out there. 0.98

00:55:00.000 You know, when I go into the tank, I'm never thinking, oh, how dope would this if I played Whole Lotta Love while I was in there? 0.99

00:55:07.000 I'm going to get high as fuck and then I'm going to... 0.97

00:55:11.000 It would be cool to do, but to me, my time in there, what I gravitate towards is doing it with nothing. 0.99

00:55:19.000 I like silence, and I like seeing where the fuck my crazy imagination takes me, or where the muse takes me, or whatever happens.

00:55:29.000 Now imagine recording all of it. 0.97

00:55:30.000 Do you see that thing where scientists can now record?

00:55:33.000 And this is scary.

00:55:34.000 This is a thing they have on Gizmodo about where they had somebody watch a bunch of videos.

00:55:40.000 And then they recorded the brain's activity.

00:55:43.000 And they show on this video, it compares what they actually saw and what the brain sees.

00:55:49.000 Yeah, they've done that to cats.

00:55:50.000 I've seen the videos.

00:55:51.000 Yeah, they've recorded them.

00:55:52.000 Crazy, right?

00:55:52.000 So can you imagine now, like 10 years from now, they're going to be able to record everything that you see?

00:55:58.000 You're not going to be able to lie anymore.

00:56:00.000 You're not going to be able to do anything.

00:56:01.000 That's where it's headed.

00:56:02.000 Ultimately, there'll be waterproof iPhones that you could swim with and it translates what you're saying to dolphin language so that you could just communicate with dolphins.

00:56:12.000 I mean, it's getting crazy, right?

00:56:14.000 I don't think they're ever going to be able to figure out the dolphin thing.

00:56:16.000 They're so far off.

00:56:17.000 Dolphin app.

00:56:18.000 Never say never.

00:56:19.000 Humans communicating with humans is going to get real weird, man.

00:56:22.000 You don't think they can figure that out, dolphin boys?

00:56:24.000 They're not close.

00:56:25.000 They're not even close. 0.99

00:56:26.000 They don't know what the fuck the dolphins are saying. 0.99

00:56:28.000 They can't talk to dolphins. 1.00

00:56:29.000 They can't send out a message to dolphins.

00:56:31.000 Hello, dolphin world.

00:56:32.000 We are friendly.

00:56:33.000 But what if they created some instrument where they decipher some sounds and they go, let's see what this sound is.

00:56:39.000 Dissect the sounds, edit them, put them together, and then play them for the dolphin.

00:56:43.000 And maybe the dolphin goes, that doesn't make any sense, but that was kind of weird.

00:56:46.000 And then you slowly put words together.

00:56:48.000 Like, oh, we got eat.

00:56:50.000 We got the one for...

00:56:50.000 Even if they had like three words down, you know what I mean?

00:56:54.000 Then they go...

00:56:55.000 Yeah, I mean, maybe we should research where the dolphin communication world is at right now.

00:57:00.000 I want to know.

00:57:01.000 I want to see a documentary.

00:57:03.000 John Lilly, that was one of the reasons why he created what he rather uses, that he used the tank for.

00:57:08.000 He used to put a tank, an isolation tank, right next to this dolphin tank, and he would drop acid and get in the tank and communicate with the dolphins.

00:57:16.000 And he's like this pioneer in interspecies communication because of that.

00:57:21.000 But what does that mean?

00:57:22.000 How much have they figured out?

00:57:23.000 As far as I know, they have figured out very little.

00:57:25.000 And I think the whole dolphin language is a mystery.

00:57:28.000 But we do know that they have dialects.

00:57:30.000 We know that different dolphin pods, if they're from a different place, they'll have a different twang.

00:57:36.000 If they know that, if they can tell that it's a different dialect...

00:57:42.000 I think it's a matter of context.

00:57:46.000 If you lived in a world, see, we live in a material world, as is the ocean.

00:57:52.000 ocean is a material world but it's in a material world where you're not stuck to the ground you're going all over the place your world you're you are flying through your world everyone is flying through the world of the ocean it's a completely different experience to not be able to alter your environment to develop some sort of intelligence to the level that dolphins have and and orcas have to the point where they'll help people they recognize when people are in trouble and they help them like killer whales will like help people get to boats yes i want to see i want -

00:58:21.000 I'm gonna read something on that.

00:58:23.000 Twitter people.

00:58:24.000 I want some documented...

00:58:25.000 That's happened.

00:58:27.000 And exactly what's happened.

00:58:28.000 How the hell did they...

00:58:30.000 There's been more than one instance of guys capsizing on boats and orcas helping them.

00:58:34.000 Help them back into the boat.

00:58:36.000 It's amazing how orcas don't attack humans.

00:58:39.000 Yeah, they don't.

00:58:40.000 But will people swim with a pot of orcas?

00:58:43.000 Will they...

00:58:44.000 Yeah.

00:58:44.000 Get in the water?

00:58:45.000 I don't know if they will let you do that, man.

00:58:47.000 I don't know.

00:58:48.000 Especially if they have children.

00:58:49.000 That doesn't seem to be a good idea. 0.98

00:58:50.000 I know people have been bitten or nudged or bumped and shit before, but I think they're pretty fucking easy going with people. 0.99

00:58:57.000 There was something I read online a long time ago, but it turned out to be horse shit. 0.99

00:59:00.000 It was that people used to get killed by killer whales all the time until fighter pilots in World War II started using orcas for target practice. 0.99

00:59:09.000 You know, and they do do shit like that. 0.97

00:59:11.000 I mean, they would use like killer whales or sharks or something like that for target practice when they're flying. 0.99

00:59:16.000 Yeah, I heard that.

00:59:16.000 And then all of a sudden, killer whales...

00:59:18.000 Stop killing people.

00:59:20.000 They had like some kind of committee and they said, you know what, it's a good idea for the existence of our species. 1.00

00:59:25.000 Don't Fuck with these humans. 1.00

00:59:27.000 These pink monkeys with their bang sticks. 1.00

00:59:29.000 You don't want to be fucking with them. 1.00

00:59:30.000 They can do some damage. 1.00

00:59:31.000 They can get out in our world and we can't go to their world. 1.00

00:59:33.000 So they just get in big wooden boats and go out to our world. 0.97

00:59:36.000 And as long as the boat's big enough, you get in one of those giant ocean liner type things, what the fuck's killer? 0.98

00:59:41.000 We're going to do that. 0.98

00:59:42.000 You can just go around jacking them left and right.

00:59:45.000 It was a terrible environment they live in.

00:59:47.000 It's crazy how the dolphins in the Caribbean or in the Gulf of Mexico or the Bahamas in that area, the ones they study, they did a...

00:59:56.000 I saw a documentary on it and it's a trip how they capture females.

01:00:02.000 They capture them Either two males, it's either two males and they capture one female at a time for like a month and then they jack her.

01:00:09.000 Or it's a big group of males, like 15 to 20, and they capture a bunch of females and make sure they don't swim off the pot.

01:00:17.000 And they're just taking turns on them.

01:00:19.000 And what's funny is the girls want to leave. 0.99

01:00:22.000 They want to take off.

01:00:23.000 They don't want to be captured. 0.98

01:00:24.000 Not because they don't want to have sex, but because they want to have sex with as many males in that region. 0.93

01:00:29.000 So when they have their baby...

01:00:32.000 If like a woman, a female dolphin had sex with a hundred male dolphins, when she gives birth and she has to watch over her child for the first three or four years, if she runs into, and she's by herself with her child, they're just swimming around, when they run into males, if those males have had sex with her, they'll leave her alone. 0.97

01:00:51.000 If those males that run into her didn't have sex with her, they will kill that baby and then capture her and bring her into their little harem. 1.00

01:00:59.000 They will kill the baby boy if it's not them. 1.00

01:01:01.000 But if they run into him... 1.00

01:01:03.000 So the female has to have as much sex as possible. 1.00

01:01:06.000 She's down with the sex. 1.00

01:01:07.000 But she wants to leave and go find some more guys before the baby hatches. 0.70

01:01:11.000 It's crazy, right?

01:01:12.000 It's insane.

01:01:15.000 But it's insane because people think of dolphins as being these fun-loving, whimsical fairies of the sea.

01:01:21.000 There are cousins.

01:01:22.000 There are fairies of the sea. 0.95

01:01:24.000 They're all loving dolphins. 0.99

01:01:25.000 Because they're cool as fuck to us. 0.99

01:01:27.000 If you're ever in a boat and you swim by some dolphins or row by some dolphins, they'll jump up and play with you. 0.99

01:01:34.000 It's interesting. 1.00

01:01:35.000 But in the dolphin world, when dicks get hard, shit gets crazy. 0.99

01:01:39.000 If it's a big group of males and they run into a couple dudes who've captured a chick, they will jack those dudes and steal their girl. 0.99

01:01:49.000 They go, this is our girl now. 0.98

01:01:51.000 Crazy. 1.00

01:01:52.000 Evil bitches. 1.00

01:01:53.000 So dolphins are just like people in a lot of ways. 0.99

01:01:55.000 Everything intelligent, this is what I was saying.

01:01:57.000 It's the dolphins in that region, not all dolphins.

01:01:59.000 I don't think all dolphins, they all have their own special mating rituals.

01:02:05.000 Well, you know, killer whales kill dolphins all the time.

01:02:07.000 Not only that, killer whales got their name not from being killers, but from killing whales.

01:02:12.000 That's where they came up with the name Killer Whales. 0.99

01:02:15.000 Killer Whales fuck whales up. 0.98

01:02:17.000 There's some horrible videos online of Killer Whales biting a whale's face off. 0.99

01:02:21.000 Like a blue whale or something?

01:02:22.000 Yeah, like a big-ass whale and just jacking this whale's face. 0.98

01:02:25.000 And the whale's trying to swim away and they're just fucking this whale up. 0.98

01:02:28.000 And it makes you really think, like, wow.

01:02:31.000 What we think of is some cute thing that does tricks at the zoo.

01:02:34.000 That's a murdering monster that lives in the ocean. 1.00

01:02:39.000 Yep. 0.98

01:02:40.000 And they're smart.

01:02:41.000 And think about what we do to them. 0.99

01:02:42.000 We don't give a fuck. 1.00

01:02:43.000 We can't understand them, so we just put them in the cage. 1.00

01:02:46.000 Get in there, bitch. 1.00

01:02:47.000 I don't know what you're saying. 1.00

01:02:50.000 They're going, I miss my mother!

01:02:51.000 I miss my father!

01:02:52.000 I miss my family!

01:02:53.000 What are you doing?

01:02:54.000 I was born to swim the open seas!

01:02:57.000 All we hear is...

01:02:59.000 What if they have the answers to the universe?

01:03:02.000 They know all the answers.

01:03:03.000 Where we came from.

01:03:04.000 They know everything.

01:03:06.000 They've been trying to tell us, but they just can't communicate.

01:03:09.000 We don't listen.

01:03:10.000 They know all about the Galactic Federation.

01:03:13.000 They know what's going on.

01:03:14.000 They go, dude, a comet's going to jack you in three years.

01:03:16.000 What if all their data was like ones and zeros?

01:03:20.000 It was all like modem sounds, and we just haven't been able to.

01:03:23.000 People are so...

01:03:24.000 Yeah, right?

01:03:26.000 Like we used to get a fax.

01:03:31.000 Yeah.

01:03:33.000 our world, we ruin the ocean world too.

01:03:35.000 We pollute the ocean world and we eat everything that's in there.

01:03:38.000 I mean, think about the two worlds that exist right next to each other, okay?

01:03:44.000 There's the world of land and then there's the world of the ocean.

01:03:46.000 The world of land, you don't get to fly but, unless you get in tubes and metal and shit like that, but you do get to manipulate matter.

01:03:54.000 You get to use your thumbs and make things and create things.

01:03:58.000 The world of the ocean, you can fly all over the place, but you can't manipulate matter.

01:04:02.000 Well, what happens? 0.94

01:04:03.000 Well, the ones who can manipulate matter, they figure out a way to make tools and make vehicles to fly over to where you live and fuck you up.

01:04:12.000 We don't think about it this way, but we're at war with the ocean.

01:04:15.000 Yeah, and we're in an ocean of oxygen.

01:04:19.000 We're just like crabs.

01:04:20.000 We just can't swim around.

01:04:22.000 We're just bottom feeders. 1.00

01:04:24.000 There's a lot of motherfuckers flying around. 1.00

01:04:26.000 Right, birds and shit. 1.00

01:04:27.000 There's an ocean of oxygen that we're walking around in. 0.99

01:04:30.000 Yeah, but in the ocean...

01:04:32.000 Yeah, that's true, right?

01:04:33.000 We are the crabs of the outer world, right?

01:04:36.000 Because there are animals in the ocean.

01:04:37.000 This is an ocean.

01:04:38.000 It's just not like the water.

01:04:39.000 There's water and then there's oxygen. 0.99

01:04:42.000 That's a good point because crabs can't fucking swim. 0.99

01:04:44.000 They're just stuck. 0.99

01:04:45.000 They're down there to clean things. 1.00

01:04:47.000 I hate those fuckers. 1.00

01:04:48.000 Clean up, stupid. 1.00

01:04:52.000 That's what they are. 1.00

01:04:52.000 When sharks run around jacking people and a foot falls to the ground, that's where the crabs go at it. 1.00

01:04:58.000 Crab people.

01:05:00.000 Yeah, and crabs, always known for the term crabs in a bucket. 0.99

01:05:06.000 Whenever you're around people and they're fucking holding each other down... 0.93

01:05:10.000 Do people still get crabs? 0.98

01:05:11.000 Do people still get crabs?

01:05:12.000 That's not like a 70s thing?

01:05:15.000 I thought it was a 70s thing.

01:05:16.000 I haven't heard of crabs in years, but I'm sure it's out there.

01:05:18.000 You just gotta look for it.

01:05:19.000 In high school, they used to say, like, dude, I got the crabs.

01:05:22.000 I got crabs. 1.00

01:05:23.000 If you're around, that was the wrong, dirty, dirty, dirty bitch. 1.00

01:05:27.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:05:29.000 Hippies, you think?

01:05:30.000 Crabs?

01:05:30.000 That's how I got it.

01:05:31.000 You got crabs from hippies, really? 1.00

01:05:33.000 Can you have crabs if you shave your pussy? 1.00

01:05:35.000 Is it possible? 1.00

01:05:37.000 It's really hard.

01:05:37.000 It's harder.

01:05:38.000 That's probably why girls started shaving their pussies. 1.00

01:05:40.000 It was the porn chicks, right? 1.00

01:05:41.000 They go, dude, we gotta fucking shave. 0.99

01:05:43.000 So it's like a chemo thing at first, but then it became cool. 1.00

01:05:46.000 Well, you know, there was like a run of people who thought it was offensive to ask women to shave their pussies. 0.98

01:05:52.000 There was like a bit, you know, back in the day when women had bushes, I remember like the debates when it was like porn was starting to alter people's perceptions of what sexual organs should look like. 0.99

01:06:03.000 I read something about this where they were discussing how, you know, women are upset that their husbands want them to shave their pussies and make it look like the porn girls. 0.98

01:06:13.000 That it's offensive and it's objectifying. 0.99

01:06:16.000 But now, everyone shaves. 1.00

01:06:18.000 The only thing cool about a hairy pussy is I used to prefer hairy pussies in my early 20s, believe it or not, because girls that shave, sometimes if they didn't shave and they have that roughness, it's like your fucking sandpaper sometimes. 1.00

01:06:30.000 But if they have a bush, it's all mushy and gushy and Have you ever heard of a Birkin? 1.00

01:06:37.000 I wonder why.

01:06:37.000 It's all soft.

01:06:38.000 Right.

01:06:39.000 I wonder why it's there specifically.

01:06:41.000 Do you think that's what it is?

01:06:42.000 It's an eyelash. 0.99

01:06:43.000 It's there because people usually fuck missionary and it's to protect that area? 0.99

01:06:47.000 No, it's to... 1.00

01:06:48.000 Hair is a good way to send off your scent.

01:06:51.000 The scent gets on the hair and then wind blows on the hair. 1.00

01:06:54.000 Oh, so that's why it's around your asshole? 1.00

01:06:57.000 So you can send out that asshole scent? 1.00

01:06:59.000 Apparently farts are aphrodisiacs when we were cavemen. 1.00

01:07:03.000 What?

01:07:04.000 Because it was awesome that this guy got some food. 1.00

01:07:07.000 That motherfucker just ate an elk. 1.00

01:07:10.000 He just ate a saber-toothed tiger. 1.00

01:07:12.000 God damn it! 0.99

01:07:13.000 I figured I'd take that brontosaurus down. 1.00

01:07:15.000 Now he's farting in my face.

01:07:17.000 Have you heard of merkins?

01:07:19.000 Do you know what merkins are?

01:07:20.000 It's like a fake pube.

01:07:21.000 Yeah, it's a fake pubic hair you can buy.

01:07:23.000 A lot of girls like to do the laser now down there and get all their pubic hair taken away and then they buy merkins if they ever want pubic hair. 1.00

01:07:31.000 What?

01:07:32.000 That's crazy.

01:07:33.000 They wear like a pubic hair toupee.

01:07:35.000 Yeah, it's like a little toupee.

01:07:35.000 And then they have fashion ones that they use too.

01:07:38.000 Who would like that? 0.60

01:07:38.000 Japanese. 0.60

01:07:39.000 That's my guess.

01:07:40.000 I have no idea.

01:07:41.000 Oh, it is?

01:07:41.000 No, that's what I would guess too.

01:07:43.000 That are people at Burning Man. 1.00

01:07:44.000 They like the craziest shit. 1.00

01:07:45.000 You know, Japanese can't... 1.00

01:07:46.000 You're not allowed to show pubic hair, right?

01:07:49.000 Right.

01:07:50.000 Yeah, something like that. 1.00

01:07:51.000 Yet they don't shave their fucking pews. 1.00

01:07:53.000 How weird is that? 0.99

01:07:54.000 I think you're not allowed to show insertion.

01:07:55.000 Is that what it is?

01:07:56.000 They need...

01:07:57.000 The Japanese, if you're listening out there, you guys...

01:08:00.000 Shave that thing, man. 1.00

01:08:01.000 God damn it. 1.00

01:08:02.000 No one likes that. 1.00

01:08:03.000 You would sell so much more porn. 1.00

01:08:05.000 But Asians are relatively unhairy compared to a lot of girls. 1.00

01:08:08.000 Not their pussies. 1.00

01:08:08.000 They're very... 1.00

01:08:09.000 Japanese are hairless, but fuck, all of a sudden it all... 1.00

01:08:12.000 You know what? 1.00

01:08:12.000 It all takes place in a pussy. 1.00

01:08:14.000 They don't have enough hair to go around for their legs and their arms and shit. 1.00

01:08:18.000 It all... 1.00

01:08:18.000 Dude, you haven't seen Japanese porn? 1.00

01:08:20.000 I have seen a very little of it. 1.00

01:08:22.000 Holy shit. 1.00

01:08:22.000 Do you think the Japanese girls are hypersexual? 1.00

01:08:25.000 I think redheads are. 1.00

01:08:27.000 Here's why.

01:08:28.000 I've been doing some research.

01:08:29.000 Redheads have thinner skin. 1.00

01:08:30.000 They also are a lot more sensitive to a lot of things. 1.00

01:08:33.000 When you get put out as a ginger, you have to have more shit to put you out. 1.00

01:08:41.000 They actually have different... 0.99

01:08:42.000 What do you mean when you go outside and you need sunscreen?

01:08:44.000 Is that what you're saying?

01:08:45.000 Well, they have thinner skin and they have a few things that are different than normal people. 0.98

01:08:49.000 And so they're like overly sensitive, like they bruise easier, the sunlight shit. 0.92

01:08:55.000 But there's also like when they're in hospitals, they have to use more medicine to knock them out too. 0.95

01:09:02.000 And it's weird.

01:09:04.000 I don't know a bunch of it.

01:09:05.000 So you think they're a separate species?

01:09:07.000 I think they're the closest to being different than Asian people. 1.00

01:09:12.000 What?

01:09:12.000 Really?

01:09:13.000 Asian people don't have thinner skin than us.

01:09:17.000 They're not more sensitive to skin than light.

01:09:20.000 If you look at redheads and true gingers compared to just a regular white person, there's a lot of differences that you would never even think of for some reason. 0.99

01:09:30.000 Really?

01:09:30.000 What else?

01:09:31.000 Their eyes are usually more prone to...

01:09:33.000 They have to wear sunglasses.

01:09:34.000 It hurts their eyes more than...

01:09:36.000 So where are they supposed to be from?

01:09:38.000 Are they like northern people?

01:09:39.000 I don't know.

01:09:41.000 I have no idea.

01:09:42.000 You know what's crazy about Japan? 0.94

01:09:44.000 I went there about a year ago.

01:09:46.000 A year and a half ago.

01:09:47.000 That's the last time.

01:09:48.000 But they're so down.

01:09:51.000 Like their number one obsession as far as girls go are schoolgirls in the schoolgirl outfits. 1.00

01:09:58.000 You know this.

01:09:58.000 That's number one.

01:09:59.000 Everybody knows.

01:10:00.000 That's crazy.

01:10:00.000 But number two is schoolgirls in French made outfits.

01:10:05.000 So it's schoolgirl and then French maid.

01:10:07.000 They have a bar out there where 15-year-old, 14-year-old girls dress up like French. 0.97

01:10:12.000 They're in lingerie and they're serving ice cream.

01:10:15.000 That's totally okay in Japan.

01:10:17.000 It's insane. 1.00

01:10:19.000 Those guys are nuts. 1.00

01:10:21.000 I'm serious. 1.00

01:10:22.000 It's crazy.

01:10:24.000 They're obsessed with schoolgirls and little girls in French maid outfits.

01:10:28.000 Just those two.

01:10:29.000 There's not even a third. 1.00

01:10:30.000 It's just, are you fucking Backstreet Boys? 0.99

01:10:32.000 Are you NSYNC? You gotta choose sides, you know? 1.00

01:10:35.000 And you have to have tentacles coming out of you.

01:10:37.000 What's all that about?

01:10:38.000 It's like the Crips of Bloods.

01:10:39.000 They got some crazy animated boys. 0.99

01:10:40.000 I think it's a loophole to get around their laws of insertion of penises and stuff. 0.99

01:10:45.000 Can you jerk off to Cartoons? 0.99

01:10:49.000 Is that possible? 0.99

01:10:50.000 I've done it before, back in the day.

01:10:51.000 There was Roger Rabbit.

01:10:52.000 Really?

01:10:53.000 Are you kidding me?

01:10:53.000 Come on, seriously?

01:10:54.000 Well, these Japanese penis porn, it's crazy shit, dude. 1.00

01:10:58.000 It's like giant dicks going through a chick and out her mouth, and she's gagging and slobbers everywhere. 1.00

01:11:03.000 That's hot? 1.00

01:11:04.000 There's dicks in her hands, in each hand. 1.00

01:11:06.000 There's loads going all over the place. 1.00

01:11:07.000 It's some of the weirdest, freakiest shit you've ever seen in your life. 0.99

01:11:11.000 I can understand girls getting off to it, because I knew a girl once who loved it. 0.99

01:11:14.000 But I just like, it's cartoons. 1.00

01:11:16.000 You need to see real shit. 1.00

01:11:18.000 Octopuses with all dicks. 1.00

01:11:20.000 And they're just fucking these crazy schoolgirl looking characters. 1.00

01:11:24.000 You know like Final Fantasy? 0.99

01:11:25.000 You know Final Fantasy?

01:11:27.000 It's CGI where they're trying to make it look real.

01:11:29.000 Yeah.

01:11:29.000 What's the best they've done in porn like that?

01:11:35.000 CGI? It's too expensive, I think.

01:11:36.000 Maybe too expensive for porn?

01:11:38.000 I think.

01:11:39.000 They've used special effects for those themed ones. 0.74

01:11:42.000 They had an avatar-themed porn.

01:11:44.000 I'm sure they must have used some sort of special effects.

01:11:46.000 The only ones I've seen, they look totally fake.

01:11:49.000 But are there any that look almost real?

01:11:51.000 You don't have to.

01:11:51.000 It's a waste of money, man.

01:11:53.000 You don't really need to...

01:11:54.000 I mean, unless there's someone out there that...

01:11:56.000 Remember Salami? 0.93

01:11:57.000 Salami had that movie.

01:12:00.000 No, yeah, that's right.

01:12:01.000 Okay.

01:12:02.000 Forget it.

01:12:03.000 Inside stories.

01:12:04.000 Bobby Salami from New York.

01:12:06.000 No, the New Jersey guy.

01:12:07.000 Yeah, yeah, Bobby Salami.

01:12:08.000 We call him Salami. 1.00

01:12:09.000 We call him Salami. 1.00

01:12:09.000 But not to be confused with the other Salami. 1.00

01:12:11.000 Oh, no, no.

01:12:12.000 Jiu-Jitsu Salami.

01:12:12.000 No, no, no.

01:12:13.000 It was Bobby Salami.

01:12:14.000 He was a...

01:12:14.000 Pizza maker.

01:12:15.000 Pizza maker.

01:12:16.000 Great guy.

01:12:20.000 People who make porn, there's that wish that they were legitimate.

01:12:25.000 I remember talking to Ron Jeremy a bunch of times at the Comedy Store, and Ron was always telling me, yeah, I got a part in this thing, and I'm real excited.

01:12:33.000 I'm trying to go mainstream.

01:12:35.000 And I was like, you're trying to go mainstream?

01:12:37.000 He's like, yeah, I'd love to be on a mainstream show.

01:12:40.000 Oh, dude, I was there. 0.99

01:12:41.000 God damn it. 1.00

01:12:41.000 I'm like, dude, you're Ron fucking Jeremy, man. 1.00

01:12:43.000 You're Ron Jeremy. 0.95

01:12:45.000 I'm like, not a lot of dudes get to be Ron Jeremy. 1.00

01:12:47.000 You're a bad motherfucker. 0.99

01:12:49.000 And you want to be like one of these regular guys on TV? Yeah. 1.00

01:12:52.000 Just keep banging those chicks. 1.00

01:12:53.000 Dude, I was right there when you said that. 0.59

01:12:54.000 I was in the parking lot at Hollywood and Highland, and I just wasn't thinking.

01:12:59.000 And remember the dickish? 0.92

01:13:00.000 I mean, that was the biggest douche... 0.79

01:13:02.000 When he started saying that, it was funny to me.

01:13:05.000 And I looked at Joe, and I'm like, can you imagine if it actually works?

01:13:08.000 And we see Ron Jeremy doing Die Hard 5, and he's in a wife-beater with a gun, and someone's breaking into the house.

01:13:15.000 And I go, can you imagine that?

01:13:16.000 And Ron Jeremy was right there. 0.99

01:13:17.000 And I started fucking laughing. 0.98

01:13:19.000 Joe was like, dude, don't laugh. 0.99

01:13:21.000 I looked at Ron Jeremy, he's not laughing. 1.00

01:13:22.000 I'm like, oh shit, I just talked mad shit right in front of him. 1.00

01:13:26.000 I felt like shit. 1.00

01:13:27.000 You didn't realize it. 1.00

01:13:29.000 You thought that he would have a sense of humor and that he'd be joking around about it. 0.98

01:13:32.000 Because if you said that about Brian or if you said that about Joey or said that about anybody else that we know, you said that about Ari, Ari would joke around and pretend to be a fucking action hero. 1.00

01:13:42.000 But when you say it about a guy who really wants a legitimate career in movies... 0.79

01:13:47.000 He was doing something with Roger Avery.

01:13:49.000 He was knocking on the door.

01:13:51.000 Roger Avery had some sort of a TV show and he was involved in it right before Roger Avery got arrested for drunk driving.

01:13:57.000 So he wanted to be a movie star. 1.00

01:14:00.000 What if Ron Jeremy just says, fuck it. 1.00

01:14:02.000 You know what? 1.00

01:14:03.000 I'm almost 50 or whatever the fuck. 0.99

01:14:05.000 Almost 50? 0.99

01:14:06.000 Whatever he is. 1.00

01:14:07.000 And then he gets into fucking diesel shape. 0.99

01:14:10.000 Can you imagine him? 1.00

01:14:11.000 If he got into diesel shape, he just said, fuck it. 1.00

01:14:14.000 That would ruin his whole appeal. 1.00

01:14:15.000 The whole appeal of Ron Jeremy is that Ron Jeremy is fat and ugly, and he's just banging the hottest bitches. 1.00

01:14:20.000 And he'll tell you, no Viagra. 1.00

01:14:22.000 I don't use Viagra.

01:14:23.000 I don't believe in it.

01:14:24.000 He won't.

01:14:25.000 He don't believe in it. 0.99

01:14:25.000 Yeah, he's a savage. 0.99

01:14:26.000 Viagra is like the steroids of the porn world. 0.99

01:14:28.000 Like, everyone's intense.

01:14:29.000 They're all in denial, but everybody's doing it.

01:14:32.000 Do you know that the NFL's trying to test for human growth hormone now?

01:14:35.000 There was a big thing I was watching on, I never watch sports shows, but they were talking to the head guy, whoever the fucking head guy of the NFL is, and he's like, yeah, well, that was a part of the bargaining that we're going to test for human growth hormone, but the players' representatives, they're still debating the science, the science of testing for human growth hormone.

01:14:54.000 We believe the science is there, and like, what are you talking about?

01:14:57.000 What, are you going to have regular-sized people playing Can you imagine if it works and they totally get steroids out of NFL? It would be so silly. 0.65

01:15:04.000 You could be 190 pounds and fucking play defensive linemen. 1.00

01:15:08.000 Rocky Marciano rolling his grave. 0.99

01:15:11.000 189 pound heavyweight champion of the world.

01:15:13.000 Dude, there'd be hope for Mexicans in football. 1.00

01:15:15.000 Right now we have one Mexican.

01:15:16.000 There'd be a lot of Mexicans, man. 0.99

01:15:18.000 Well, you know, look at a Mexican like Cain Velasquez.

01:15:21.000 He's a rare dude, you know, a 240-pound ultra-athlete, you know, who moves fast. 0.99

01:15:28.000 He fucking moves fast. 1.00

01:15:29.000 He doubles fast as fuck. 1.00

01:15:30.000 What if he went to boxing and became the world heavyweight champion in boxing? 1.00

01:15:35.000 There's nobody out there, right?

01:15:36.000 Oh, I bet he could do it.

01:15:37.000 Well, I don't know, man.

01:15:37.000 If he'd have to deal with the Klitschkos.

01:15:39.000 But I think he's one of those guys that there's a few guys where their mind is so fucking strong, their work ethic is so strong, and their ability to pull shit off. 0.99

01:15:49.000 Like, Kane has got this fucking wicked belief in himself, man. 0.99

01:15:53.000 You can see it in that dude's eyes before he goes out there and says, Yeah, and he's got that big Incan head. 1.00

01:15:57.000 You know what I mean? 0.99

01:15:58.000 And he's a fucking super athlete, man. 0.99

01:16:00.000 You know, he doesn't look like, you know, your standard super athlete. 0.99

01:16:03.000 He doesn't have, like, super low body fat.

01:16:05.000 He doesn't have, like, a ridiculous six-pack and veins everywhere.

01:16:08.000 He doesn't look like a Kevin Randleman. 1.00

01:16:10.000 But that's also one of the reasons why the motherfucker never gets tired. 0.99

01:16:13.000 That guy never gets tired. 0.99

01:16:14.000 No one's got conditioning like Cain Velasquez.

01:16:17.000 Yeah.

01:16:17.000 I think that guy can do anything he wants.

01:16:19.000 I think we're lucky to have him as a UFC heavyweight champion, but he would be whatever the fuck he wanted to be. 0.99

01:16:26.000 If he wanted to play football, he'd be playing football. 0.99

01:16:28.000 If he wanted to be a heavyweight boxer, he'd be a badass fucking heavyweight boxer. 1.00

01:16:32.000 He's just a killer. 1.00

01:16:34.000 There's certain dudes that are just killers. 0.99

01:16:36.000 He should do the cover of ESPN in a cholo outfit. 1.00

01:16:39.000 It's just rare that Mexicans are that big. 1.00

01:16:42.000 That's all it is. 0.96

01:16:42.000 Just ride with it. 0.96

01:16:43.000 Go with it.

01:16:44.000 With a baseball cap with the front flipped all the way up.

01:16:47.000 Like a suicidal tendency, dude.

01:16:49.000 What do you think about Junior Dos Santos and Cain Velasquez?

01:16:52.000 First of all, how amazing is it? 0.99

01:16:54.000 Stop for a second and think how many Mexicans are fucking badass fighters. 1.00

01:16:58.000 Besides me or counting everybody? 1.00

01:17:00.000 You two.

01:17:01.000 Along with you.

01:17:02.000 But let's include the boxers.

01:17:05.000 Like Julio Cesar Chavez.

01:17:07.000 I mean, that dude epitomized what a badass Mexican boxer was. 0.99

01:17:12.000 He would come out to the fucking mariachi music and he had the flag on his fucking head and he would just jack people. 0.98

01:17:19.000 You know, the days of Julio Cesar Chavez, man. 1.00

01:17:22.000 Think about all the...

01:17:23.000 I mean, it's amazing how many...

01:17:25.000 This Victor Ortiz kid...

01:17:27.000 Think about how many people who are badass fighters are of Mexican descent.

01:17:31.000 It's amazing numbers, man.

01:17:33.000 I think it's because it's the closest third world Latin country to Vegas.

01:17:41.000 It's the closest one.

01:17:42.000 You know what I mean? 1.00

01:17:43.000 Because really, Mexicans, Guatemalans, El Salvadorians, Colombians, it's all the same shit. 1.00

01:17:48.000 Come on. 1.00

01:17:49.000 They're just the closest one to Las Vegas and L.A. Yeah. 0.99

01:17:53.000 But, you know, I love Mexico, and I'm Mexican, in case you guys are all pissed off, but, you know, those borders out there, it's all the same shit, come on. 0.99

01:18:02.000 It is, but the Mexicans figured out, especially in boxing, a way to be super fucking successful. 1.00

01:18:08.000 You know, I mean, you can't discount, you know, and just say it's all the same shit, because Mexicans in particular have been really successful at boxing. 0.98

01:18:18.000 You know, they've brought up some incredible boxers out of Mexico. 0.99

01:18:22.000 And they have the most loyal fans. 1.00

01:18:23.000 The Mexican fans are fucking nuts! 1.00

01:18:26.000 Eric Morales, remember when that dude was on top? 1.00

01:18:30.000 Goddamn! 0.96

01:18:30.000 They go for the most Mexican too, because when Julio Cesar Chavez was at his prime when he fought Oscar De La Hoya, well he was actually falling off his prime a little bit, and Oscar De La Hoya was rising. 0.96

01:18:40.000 You had to choose a side.

01:18:42.000 They all went with the most Mexican, and the most Mexican was Julio Cesar Chavez. 0.85

01:18:45.000 He couldn't even speak a word of English. 0.98

01:18:47.000 He was a beast. 1.00

01:18:48.000 Yeah, he was a fucking beast. 1.00

01:18:49.000 He would just body punch the fucking shit out of you. 1.00

01:18:52.000 He would just stay on top of you until he eventually just broke you down. 1.00

01:18:55.000 I was a giant boxing fan before the UFC. I was just as fanatic with boxing as I was for MMA or for UFC. I loved them both.

01:19:04.000 I saw Oscar De La Hoya's first pro fight at the LA Forum.

01:19:07.000 I was a huge fan, but I had to make a choice. 1.00

01:19:09.000 Fuck! 1.00

01:19:10.000 I chose Julio Cesar Chavez. 1.00

01:19:12.000 I went to see Barrera fight live.

01:19:14.000 I saw him fight live.

01:19:15.000 It was in LA somewhere.

01:19:17.000 I want to say it was a Staples Center, but it might have been before the Staples Center even existed. 0.99

01:19:21.000 I don't know where the fuck I saw him, but I saw him fight some other dude, some black dude that was pretty good, but Barrera beat his ass. 0.99

01:19:28.000 We were all hanging out with Mexicans. 0.99

01:19:29.000 It's me and my friend Terry Claibon, who's a boxing coach, and we're all watching this. 0.99

01:19:33.000 They were going fucking bananas. 0.99

01:19:36.000 When Barrera was going off, they were going fucking bananas. 1.00

01:19:40.000 Boxing is... 1.00

01:19:41.000 That's when the racism just fucking comes out and it's okay. 0.99

01:19:44.000 It's okay to be racist if there's boxing going on. 0.99

01:19:46.000 Anytime a Mexican fought anybody else, I always went for the Mexican. 1.00

01:19:52.000 Even if it wasn't Mexican, if he was Honduran and he was fighting a white guy, I'm going with the Latin guy. 0.77

01:19:57.000 That's the closest thing to Mexico.

01:19:59.000 It was okay.

01:20:00.000 My best friend growing up, James, he was black.

01:20:02.000 We were both into boxing.

01:20:03.000 He always went for the black guy. 0.98

01:20:05.000 I always went for the Mexican guy. 1.00

01:20:07.000 Always. 0.91

01:20:07.000 He never went for the Mexican guy and I went for the black guy. 0.91

01:20:10.000 And it was okay.

01:20:11.000 But MMA, totally different.

01:20:15.000 In MMA, I can care less if the guy's Mexican. 1.00

01:20:19.000 What I like is style.

01:20:20.000 Style is way thicker than blood.

01:20:22.000 I'm a jiu-jitsu guy.

01:20:23.000 I'm always going.

01:20:24.000 I'm always pulling for the jiu-jitsu guys.

01:20:26.000 Always.

01:20:26.000 I don't care if it's a black jiu-jitsu guy against a kickboxer from Mexico from where my mom was born.

01:20:33.000 Like, fuck you. 1.00

01:20:34.000 I'm going for the black jiu-jitsu guy. 1.00

01:20:36.000 Oh, that's funny.

01:20:37.000 It's always jiu-jitsu.

01:20:38.000 Well, you have to think that.

01:20:39.000 You're a jiu-jitsu instructor.

01:20:41.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:20:41.000 It's styles way thicker than blood, but boxing, shit. 1.00

01:20:44.000 A lot of people think that I pull for jiu-jitsu guys, man, but most of my favorite fighters are strikers. 0.99

01:20:49.000 I pull for extraordinary talent.

01:20:55.000 That's what I pull for.

01:20:56.000 I don't pull for individuals. 1.00

01:20:58.000 I want to see some crazy shit. 0.93

01:21:00.000 Even if it's a guy who I thought was really good before, then all of a sudden they pull something off that's amazing and makes you look at them differently. 1.00

01:21:08.000 That's my favorite shit. 0.99

01:21:10.000 I like watching just guys pull shit off. 1.00

01:21:13.000 I just like watching guys improve, guys that are really good. 0.96

01:21:17.000 Yeah.

01:21:17.000 I like just the best submission guys.

01:21:20.000 Those are always my favorite.

01:21:22.000 Aoki's always my favorite.

01:21:23.000 I like that too, but I still like watching Anderson, man.

01:21:26.000 You can't deny that.

01:21:27.000 Oh, definitely.

01:21:27.000 I love knockouts.

01:21:29.000 Who doesn't love a great knockout? 1.00

01:21:31.000 I love that shit too, but I'm always pulling for cool new submissions because there's so much room for improvement in jiu-jitsu and MMA. There's so much room. 0.99

01:21:39.000 It's still at its...

01:21:40.000 Infancy, you know?

01:21:41.000 There's something special to me. 0.74

01:21:42.000 I mean, it sounds kind of fucked up, but there's something special to me when a guy has reached the extraordinary heights that, like, Anderson Silva has. 0.99

01:21:51.000 He's standing right in front of Yushin Okami, standing right in front of him with his hands down, his fists balled up, and you just realize, like, this poor fucking mouse is in a box with a cobra, and it's gonna get jacked. 0.99

01:22:04.000 It's gonna get jacked. 0.98

01:22:05.000 You realize that Yushin was trapped in there with Anderson Silva.

01:22:09.000 He was no longer competitive.

01:22:11.000 There was a moment after he head kicked him at the end of the first round. 0.99

01:22:14.000 He fucking blasted him with a head kick. 0.98

01:22:15.000 And from that moment on, Yushin was not competitive. 0.99

01:22:19.000 Anderson knew it, too.

01:22:20.000 There's no way you take one of those head kicks and be okay.

01:22:22.000 I mean, you might look okay.

01:22:23.000 You fall down.

01:22:24.000 You get back up.

01:22:25.000 You look okay. 1.00

01:22:26.000 But your shit is done. 1.00

01:22:28.000 And Anderson just got in front of him and started moving around on him. 1.00

01:22:32.000 When you watch someone of that skill level, man, I don't care what they're doing.

01:22:36.000 If they're doing boxing, if they're doing jujitsu, if they're just kickboxing, that's what I like.

01:22:41.000 I like watching someone who's just hitting those rare heights.

01:22:45.000 How about T.J. Grant pulling guard with a guillotine?

01:22:48.000 Dude pops his head out and switches to that beautiful arm bar.

01:22:50.000 Oh, it was amazing.

01:22:51.000 Even though there's controversy, you know, that he didn't tap and all that.

01:22:55.000 There's some controversy there, though.

01:22:56.000 But the fact that T.J. Grant was so confident in his guard that he pulled guard with a guillotine...

01:23:02.000 Because a lot of guys don't like pulling guard with a guillotine.

01:23:04.000 Because if the guy pops his head out and he gets out of the guillotine, oh, you're on your back and he's on top...

01:23:09.000 But he clearly did it in a sequence.

01:23:12.000 The guy was defending with his left arm and he knew he was going to get that arm.

01:23:15.000 He knew it. 1.00

01:23:16.000 And as the guy's defending, shit! 1.00

01:23:17.000 He lets it go and goes to the arm bar. 1.00

01:23:19.000 He was so confident of...

01:23:21.000 So few fighters are...

01:23:22.000 They're just not confident of fighting off their backs, you know?

01:23:25.000 There's so many Brazilian black belts out there.

01:23:28.000 Mundial champions who...

01:23:30.000 They just...

01:23:30.000 They refuse to pull guard.

01:23:32.000 They don't feel like, you know, I don't know what they're thinking, but to me, it just seems like they don't have enough confidence in their guard.

01:23:40.000 They've been doing jiu-jitsu a long time, and it's refreshing to see someone like T.J. Grant.

01:23:44.000 It's like, you know what?

01:23:44.000 I'm having trouble taking this guy down.

01:23:46.000 Let me just pull guard and attack off my back.

01:23:48.000 Well, he almost got him with an armbar in the first round.

01:23:51.000 He had locked up an armbar and went belly down at the very last seconds of the first round.

01:23:56.000 He's a beast, man. 0.95

01:23:57.000 At 155, that kid's a killer.

01:24:00.000 I knew he was talented when he first fought Rio Chonan in his UFC debut.

01:24:04.000 That's a tough fight for your UFC debut.

01:24:06.000 And he won.

01:24:07.000 He won a decision. 1.00

01:24:07.000 I'm like, this fucking kid's good. 1.00

01:24:09.000 How about Paul Sass? 0.99

01:24:10.000 He hasn't fought in like a year.

01:24:11.000 And he's like, the first I've ever heard of Paul Sass, he was fighting on the undercard in an England show over a year ago.

01:24:19.000 And it was a headline on the underground.

01:24:22.000 It said, the headline was, I'd like to fight off my back.

01:24:25.000 I'm like, you never have seen that as a headline for a fighter in some interview.

01:24:29.000 I'd like to fight off my back.

01:24:30.000 He's so dangerous off his back, though.

01:24:32.000 Yeah, and then I'm like, wow, let me watch this guy.

01:24:34.000 I go, this guy pulls guard.

01:24:36.000 So the fight a year and a half ago in England, he shoots, pulls guard, attacks off his back.

01:24:43.000 The guy stands up, pulls away, runs away.

01:24:45.000 They stand up again.

01:24:46.000 Still first round.

01:24:47.000 He shoots deep, makes the guy sprawl, pulls guard, attacks him.

01:24:51.000 The guy pulls out of an omelette or a triangle.

01:24:53.000 They go again.

01:24:54.000 Third time, he shoots, pulls guard, goes after like a leg lock.

01:24:56.000 He just misses it, bam, or something like that.

01:24:59.000 And still in the first round, he shot again for a fourth time shot.

01:25:04.000 The dude sprawled, he pulled guard, and then he got him.

01:25:07.000 He got him.

01:25:09.000 There's a guy out there named Paul Sass who's so confident on fighting his back and people don't want anything to do with his guard. 0.99

01:25:17.000 He sits on his ass and says, come on, get on top. 0.99

01:25:19.000 I'm spotting you. 1.00

01:25:20.000 I'm spotting you.

01:25:22.000 Guys refuse to get in his guard. 0.99

01:25:25.000 You would think they're like, damn, this guy's gonna go on his back. 0.99

01:25:27.000 I'm just gonna go on top and just mash him. 0.99

01:25:28.000 I can't believe he's just submitting and just going on his back.

01:25:31.000 His guard is so dangerous, guys.

01:25:33.000 The hard part is getting guys to agree to get into his guard.

01:25:37.000 That's unique.

01:25:38.000 That's fascinating to me.

01:25:40.000 I love seeing that.

01:25:41.000 Paul Sass, TJ Grant.

01:25:43.000 Man, I'm huge fans of those guys.

01:25:46.000 Well, what it is is that people are realizing that there's a level that's possible to achieve that hasn't been demonstrated yet.

01:25:53.000 And there's a lot of those people in straight jiu-jitsu, and there's a lot of those people in straight submission grappling, but in MMA, when you add in all the other things, we haven't seen anybody really pull it off.

01:26:04.000 We haven't ever seen the way Marcelo Garcia went through all those competitors in Abu Dhabi in 2003. Remember when we first saw Marcelo in person?

01:26:12.000 We're like, this guy is like a speed demon, the way he was going through people.

01:26:16.000 The finality to his technique was so clean.

01:26:20.000 But that's, you know, it's a different world when you add in wrestling, and when you add in punching, and you add in knees and kicks.

01:26:27.000 It's a different world.

01:26:28.000 We haven't quite seen someone hit those heights of submission anymore.

01:26:32.000 We're starting to see it though.

01:26:33.000 There are a handful of fighters that have zero problem pulling guard.

01:26:38.000 And Vinny Magalhas is one.

01:26:40.000 He used to fight in the UFC. He was in one of the seasons of tough.

01:26:43.000 He pulls guard like he doesn't mind.

01:26:45.000 His guard is so dangerous that he will pull guard and attack you.

01:26:49.000 And, you know, again, there's Paul Sass.

01:26:51.000 Paul Sass fought last week.

01:26:52.000 He did the exact same thing.

01:26:53.000 He pulled guard.

01:26:55.000 Guy pulled out of an arm bar or a triangle and then he switched it to a leg lock.

01:26:58.000 It was a beautiful leg lock.

01:26:59.000 So...

01:27:00.000 And then Aoki will pull guard anytime.

01:27:03.000 Did you see Matt Wyman and Mack Danzig?

01:27:05.000 That was amazing. 0.99

01:27:06.000 Matt Wyman got Mack Danzig in a fucking serious arm bar. 0.98

01:27:09.000 And he didn't tap him, but I'm like, whoa, that was quick. 0.98

01:27:12.000 He hit a nice arm bar off his back.

01:27:14.000 If Mack Danzig didn't have such good defense, he would have got that.

01:27:17.000 We're starting to see more and more fighters be active once they get put on their back.

01:27:23.000 Like if they got put on their back and they didn't want to be there, like Miguel Torres, if he gets put on his back, he will attack you.

01:27:29.000 He's just not going to sit there.

01:27:30.000 Javi Vasquez, he's just not going to sit there.

01:27:32.000 He's going to attack you.

01:27:34.000 And then you've got guys like… Rubble Johnson.

01:27:39.000 Who wants to be on top?

01:27:40.000 Imagine if Rumble Johnson had a guard.

01:27:42.000 Dude, Rumble Johnson's frightening.

01:27:44.000 Did you see that fight with Charlie Brenneman?

01:27:46.000 He's terrifying.

01:27:47.000 His eyes look orange.

01:27:48.000 I wonder if he's wearing contacts.

01:27:50.000 Well, you know he's had surgery on his eyes.

01:27:51.000 Oh, is that what it is?

01:27:52.000 He got poked.

01:27:53.000 He got poked really bad by Kevin Burns.

01:27:55.000 Remember, Kevin Burns could not close his left hand.

01:27:58.000 Kevin Burns broke his left hand so many times that he literally couldn't close it.

01:28:02.000 So he would like paw with his left and then throw his right. 1.00

01:28:05.000 And he poked the fucking shit out of his eyes. 1.00

01:28:07.000 Yep. 1.00

01:28:07.000 Anthony Johnson's a beast. 1.00

01:28:10.000 Jesus. 0.99

01:28:10.000 He's scary. 0.99

01:28:11.000 He's a true super athlete.

01:28:14.000 First of all, the idea that that guy can get to 170, it defies logic.

01:28:19.000 It defies reason.

01:28:21.000 You look at him and you see him in between fights, that's a heavyweight. 0.99

01:28:25.000 That's a goddamn heavyweight. 0.99

01:28:26.000 And then somehow or another he makes 170 and he looks crazy. 1.00

01:28:29.000 Fucking great the day of. 0.94

01:28:30.000 Whatever he's doing, he's doing it right. 0.97

01:28:32.000 I just wonder if it takes so much out of him.

01:28:35.000 I think what he does at 170, he could probably do it at 185, too.

01:28:39.000 I think he might even feel better if he was doing it at 185. He might feel healthier.

01:28:44.000 I don't know.

01:28:45.000 I'm only just taking wild stabs at it because I don't think it's so good to cut We're good to go.

01:29:12.000 That guy, when he's confident, when he's confident and he's real sure he's going to tag you, like he was at the finals of tough when he fought that Tommy Spears kid, when he's real confident that his stand-up is way better than you, he's so dangerous.

01:29:25.000 He's one of the scariest guys at 170, even scarier than Tiago.

01:29:29.000 Tiago Alves is probably the best technical striker, but Anthony Johnson, when he gets you hurt, he's the scariest guy.

01:29:35.000 He's the scariest.

01:29:36.000 I think he's got gnarly potential.

01:29:39.000 I think what you see now is that guy's going to get better.

01:29:42.000 He's getting better already. 0.99

01:29:43.000 He's just a freak, fucking awesome athlete. 1.00

01:29:48.000 That's racialist. 1.00

01:29:49.000 No, that's just reality, man. 1.00

01:29:51.000 If he was white, I'd say the same goddamn thing. 0.99

01:29:53.000 Whatever he's doing, he's doing awesome. 0.99

01:29:55.000 It's hard work and discipline, for sure, go into any recipe for success.

01:30:01.000 But that guy, he's a special athlete. 0.99

01:30:04.000 He's built to fuck people up. 0.99

01:30:06.000 This is a good sport for him. 1.00

01:30:08.000 There are certain guys, like John Jones always says that he can't fucking throw a football. 0.98

01:30:12.000 He's not good at basketball. 0.99

01:30:14.000 He can't dunk. 0.99

01:30:15.000 But god damn, is he designed perfect for MMA. John Jones has literally the perfect frame. 0.97

01:30:23.000 If you look at all the people that are fighting right now and all the different equations, how would you get to this guy?

01:30:29.000 How would you beat that guy?

01:30:30.000 What are you going to do? 0.99

01:30:31.000 You get to Jon Jones, you go, damn, good luck. 0.98

01:30:34.000 And I love the fact that, even though I'm not a striker, like I said, I'm a fan of striking. 0.99

01:30:39.000 I was a big boxing fan.

01:30:40.000 I love...

01:30:41.000 That more and more fighters are starting to implement Taekwondo and Kung Fu kicks.

01:30:48.000 I love that.

01:30:49.000 And guys like Jon Jones and Anderson Silva, they're doing Kung Fu.

01:30:53.000 They're throwing Wing Chun kicks.

01:30:55.000 They're throwing Taekwondo kicks.

01:30:56.000 And that one guy at 45, is it Dustin Dennis?

01:31:01.000 The guy who's just an awesome kicker?

01:31:04.000 Dustin Dennis?

01:31:06.000 You know what I'm talking about?

01:31:07.000 I'm not sure.

01:31:08.000 Yeah, he's at 45. He fought...

01:31:10.000 Who did he fight?

01:31:13.000 Did he fight Florian?

01:31:14.000 Kenny Florian?

01:31:15.000 Oh, Diego Nunes.

01:31:17.000 Diego Nunes.

01:31:18.000 That's it.

01:31:18.000 That guy.

01:31:19.000 He's a serious kicker.

01:31:20.000 That guy, watch him.

01:31:21.000 Novo Uñao guy. 0.95

01:31:22.000 Yeah, that guy can kick.

01:31:24.000 He's got great kicks.

01:31:25.000 Those Novo Uñao guys, man.

01:31:27.000 A lot of those guys are wicked kickers.

01:31:28.000 I would say a good...

01:31:31.000 80%, 85% of MMA fighters today are just throwing the basic leg kick and then a head kick, occasionally maybe a spinning back kick or something.

01:31:42.000 I love guys who just throw it all up.

01:31:44.000 Well, usually those guys have a taekwondo or karate background because in normal MMA training, man, it's way harder to teach someone how to throw a side kick than it is how to teach them to throw a round kick.

01:31:54.000 I can teach you to throw a low kick and to throw it correctly in a couple of steps.

01:31:59.000 And any normal athlete, a football player, a baseball player, any normal athlete can perform that.

01:32:04.000 But if I say, alright, do a wheel kick, I want you to do a wheel kick with power.

01:32:08.000 Like, Jesus Christ, that takes a long time to learn.

01:32:12.000 Even if you're a super athlete, it's going to take a while to pick up.

01:32:15.000 But Jon Jones is throwing it.

01:32:17.000 Well, of course.

01:32:18.000 But Jon Jones is training for quite a while now.

01:32:20.000 What I'm saying is it's not easy to pick up those certain techniques like sidekicks.

01:32:25.000 Jon's got a wicked sidekick now, too, man.

01:32:28.000 He's got a front leg sidekick.

01:32:29.000 He hops forward, too.

01:32:30.000 He was throwing spinning backkicks.

01:32:32.000 He threw a hopping sidekick against the cage just to warm up like I was warming up.

01:32:37.000 I'm like, whoa, he's doing it.

01:32:39.000 Perfectly.

01:32:40.000 Knee up high, turning the hip.

01:32:42.000 Kung Lee pretty much proved that a lot of those Kung Fu kicks are legit. 0.94

01:32:47.000 Oh yeah.

01:32:47.000 They work.

01:32:48.000 Kung Lee's got the best 360 turning sidekick in the game.

01:32:52.000 His sidekicks are one of the things that makes his fight with Vanderlei so interesting.

01:32:57.000 Because when American kickboxers started fighting Thai fighters, they found two things out.

01:33:02.000 One, they found out how difficult it is to deal with leg kicks. 0.98

01:33:04.000 They were getting fucked up by leg kicks. 0.90

01:33:06.000 But guys like Don Wilson, he learned leg kicks early on, and he fought a lot of leg kick fights. 0.98

01:33:14.000 He realized how good the front leg side kick was, the front leg roundhouse kick, the kicks that the Thais weren't that good at. 1.00

01:33:21.000 The Thais would throw the teep, but they would get close enough to each other to jack each other's legs. 1.00

01:33:25.000 And when you fight that style where you kick the legs, you don't necessarily develop the techniques like the karate techniques.

01:33:32.000 Because the karate techniques, a lot of them, when you're coming up through the ranks, they kind of get shut down by a lot of the Thai techniques. 0.68

01:33:38.000 But if you learn karate before you learn Muay Thai, Then you have all that crazy dexterity for axe kicks and wheel kicks and all that shit that maybe wouldn't work as well if guys were kicking your legs.

01:33:49.000 You might have a more conservative game. 0.98

01:33:51.000 So guys that come up through the Taekwondo ranks, those are the ones who do wild, crazy shit because you can't get punched in the face in Taekwondo tournaments. 0.88

01:33:59.000 So when those guys get into Muay Thai, that's Diego Nunes, that's Anderson Silva, that's also Edson Barbosa. 0.99

01:34:05.000 They got all that shit in their back pocket. 0.99

01:34:07.000 Yeah, that Edson Barbosa guy. 1.00

01:34:09.000 So you would say that...

01:34:12.000 For kids that are dreaming about being UFC champions, to do some Taekwondo for a few years, just to get all the crazy kicks down and get your balance down?

01:34:22.000 Maybe not even do Taekwondo by itself, but incorporate a couple of days of Taekwondo training into your training.

01:34:28.000 Say if you were a new kid and you were trying to become an MMA fighter, What you should do is, at least one day a week, work on kicks.

01:34:37.000 Because one of the things you can do by working on these wild kicks is, you know, forget about the sparring, forget about everything.

01:34:42.000 You just want to work on the technique of the kick and learn how to kick things.

01:34:45.000 Learn how to stretch out that front leg side kick, learn the wheel kick, learn the axe kick.

01:34:49.000 Once you do it, if you do it with someone who's really good at it, you see, like, the high level.

01:34:54.000 And then that's what you mirror in your mind, and that's what you try to recreate.

01:34:58.000 And that's how you get really good at those things.

01:34:59.000 When you add in kicks, a lot of those techniques go out the window.

01:35:03.000 When you add in punches, a lot of those techniques go out the window.

01:35:07.000 You add in punches, a lot of those techniques go out the window.

01:35:09.000 You add in takedowns, a lot of those techniques go out the window.

01:35:12.000 Unless you know how to check kicks, block takedowns, and you have good boxing.

01:35:18.000 So you have to have all those other things.

01:35:21.000 You can use the Taekwondo again.

01:35:22.000 Because then you have all these other techniques.

01:35:24.000 Then it's just another tool for the arsenal.

01:35:26.000 But unless you have a fully rounded game, those tools become problems.

01:35:32.000 Like the kicks, you rely on them too much and you drop your hands, you get punched in the face because you're not used to being punched in the face.

01:35:37.000 So you have to develop...

01:35:40.000 Good timing and distance for punches as well as kicks.

01:35:42.000 You have to change your game.

01:35:44.000 But once you do change your game...

01:35:45.000 See, that's the beauty of adding it in as, like, one day a week or two days a week where you just constantly work on only those techniques.

01:35:53.000 You're doing all that other stuff, too.

01:35:55.000 So you might actually be able to pull them off.

01:35:57.000 I think eventually what we're going to have to have is there's going to be, like, a system.

01:36:01.000 You know, when they train football players, you know, and they don't just...

01:36:05.000 Just take a lucky guess.

01:36:06.000 Today we're going to do this.

01:36:08.000 I don't know if this is going to help you, but today I want you to chop wood with an axe.

01:36:13.000 Today, maybe it'll help if you pick up bags of sand.

01:36:16.000 No, they don't do that. 0.98

01:36:18.000 They know what the fuck they're doing when they're training football players. 0.99

01:36:20.000 They know what they're doing when they're preparing plays. 0.99

01:36:23.000 They know what they're doing when they're monitoring guys' performances and measuring their time and their distance when they're running the 40 or running the 100. They're trying to figure out what's the best way to optimize athleticism.

01:36:36.000 Eventually that's going to happen and it's going to be a scientific approach to MMA training.

01:36:41.000 And there's going to be a bunch of different approaches.

01:36:43.000 Everyone's going to have their own little style to do it, but it's going to get to a point where we know exactly how many hours you're supposed to train in a day before it's detrimental.

01:36:52.000 We know that even though you can do it five hours a day, you shouldn't do it five hours a day. 0.90

01:36:57.000 It fucks you up.

01:36:58.000 We know what's the exact program you should be on as far as striking. 0.96

01:37:02.000 What are the exact lessons you should be learning every day?

01:37:06.000 Because that's how it should be treated.

01:37:07.000 It should be treated as something you're trying to develop, like a project you're developing.

01:37:10.000 And it should be micromanaged.

01:37:12.000 You should manage every single aspect of it.

01:37:14.000 You should manage all the holes. 0.98

01:37:15.000 You should objectively analyze all the different techniques, all your vulnerabilities in sparring, what body types give you problems, all that shit. 0.83

01:37:22.000 It has to be treated like a science in order to really, truly optimize it.

01:37:27.000 Then you add in creativity and the ability to improvise and the ability to fight hard and the ability to be disciplined and get in shape.

01:37:35.000 But eventually we're going to get to that point where people are getting so good.

01:37:38.000 Like these Rory McDonald's of the world.

01:37:40.000 These young kids that are coming up. 0.99

01:37:41.000 They're so fucking good. 0.98

01:37:43.000 You see them improving. 0.98

01:37:44.000 Every time you see them, they're way better.

01:37:45.000 You're like, wow!

01:37:46.000 Eventually, it's going to have to be down to a science because you're going to deal with the abilities that people are going to have are going to be so fucking high level at the very top.

01:37:57.000 We're going to see guys that we can't even imagine because we haven't seen them yet.

01:38:02.000 We're going to look back on even Vitor Belfort or guys of this era that are devastating. 0.89

01:38:08.000 We're going to look back on them and say, boy, but if they fought the guys of 2030, they'd probably get fucked up. 0.96

01:38:14.000 The same way people look at Rocky Marciano and go, what the fuck is Rocky Marciano going to do to Vitaly Klitschko? 0.99

01:38:20.000 Vitaly Klitschko is seven feet fucking tall. 0.99

01:38:23.000 He's got a telephone pole for a jab. 1.00

01:38:25.000 And he would just blast that poor little dude in the head all day until he fell unconscious. 0.69

01:38:29.000 That's what we're going to look back on now.

01:38:31.000 We're going to look back on the greats like GSP. We're going to look back on him now.

01:38:34.000 One day in the future where there's going to be some super fucking freak athlete who you think would probably beat GSP fairly easily. 0.95

01:38:43.000 It's going to happen, man. 0.96

01:38:44.000 It's going to happen in all the weight classes. 0.99

01:38:46.000 We're in the middle of the fucking stream right now. 0.98

01:38:48.000 We haven't even come close to the dam. 0.98

01:38:50.000 We're not even close to the full limits of human potential.

01:38:54.000 You think about the kind of freak athletes that they have in basketball.

01:38:57.000 Wait till those all start fighting MMA fights.

01:39:00.000 Think about some of the amazing specimens that choose to play baseball because they're good sprinters and they can run around the bases real quickly.

01:39:09.000 What if those guys decide to start fighting?

01:39:11.000 Those are the real freak athletes.

01:39:14.000 Like I was telling you, I mean, I've been...

01:39:16.000 I've been doing jiu-jitsu a long time, and when you train jiu-jitsu, even a couple years, you know if you're going against a wrestler. 0.97

01:39:23.000 You roll with someone, you're like, damn, did you wrestle?

01:39:26.000 They feel like a whole different person. 0.96

01:39:29.000 And after a while, after doing it for 10, 15 years, you get really, really good at gauging someone's strength, and Kind of guessing what kind of athletic background they had.

01:39:40.000 I've rolled with soccer players, dudes that played soccer their whole life, and you're like, wow, they've got some strong passing, strong hips.

01:39:48.000 And a year ago, I opened 10th Planet Vista, and that's in San Diego County.

01:39:56.000 And inside of 10th Planet Vista, they have a dance studio, too.

01:40:00.000 It's like, you know, in my studio, we have pole dancers. 0.99

01:40:03.000 Every academy has their own little flavor.

01:40:05.000 Down at Vista, they have breakdancing.

01:40:08.000 It's like a new eclectic breakdancing that combines kung fu breakdancing Yoga, double lotus stuff.

01:40:16.000 And it's all based on getting into double lotus.

01:40:18.000 It's a trip.

01:40:19.000 So it's like rubber guard break dancing.

01:40:21.000 Well, there's a group out there.

01:40:23.000 They've been dancing.

01:40:24.000 For people who don't know, double lotus, for the folks who don't know, is like a yoga position where you have one foot and then you wrap the other foot over onto the other knee.

01:40:32.000 It's very difficult to get into for the average unflexible person.

01:40:35.000 It's like a super flexible Indian style type thing.

01:40:37.000 Yes, that's a good way of putting it.

01:40:39.000 And, you know, the school opened and right away, all the break dancers started taking jiu-jitsu.

01:40:44.000 And there's one lead break dancer.

01:40:46.000 His name is Gio.

01:40:47.000 He calls himself Freak Show.

01:40:48.000 And after two months of training, he...

01:40:51.000 He calls himself Freak Show?

01:40:53.000 Yeah.

01:40:53.000 The whole thing's a Freak Show.

01:40:55.000 Oh, yeah.

01:40:55.000 It's like a band.

01:40:57.000 What's your name, man?

01:40:57.000 They're a group.

01:40:58.000 Freak Show.

01:40:59.000 How you doing?

01:41:02.000 You roll with him, you're going to feel a little freak show.

01:41:04.000 It's incredible.

01:41:04.000 He's 145 pounds, and after training two months, he did the Gracie Nationals.

01:41:09.000 And it looked like, you know, he did beginner's division, but it looked like he was sandbagging.

01:41:13.000 He was just going right through dudes.

01:41:14.000 It was incredible.

01:41:16.000 And I thought, wow, what's this guy going to look like in a couple years?

01:41:20.000 Well, a year later, Sean Bollinger is one of my black belts.

01:41:23.000 He is the one who certified that school.

01:41:26.000 He gave him a purple belt after one year.

01:41:28.000 And I'm like, wow.

01:41:29.000 I mean, how good is this guy getting now?

01:41:31.000 So I invited him and all his break dancers over to headquarters, my school here in LA. And he had a year experience and was already a purple belt.

01:41:40.000 And I'm like, hmm, this guy, he really is a freak.

01:41:43.000 Let me see what he feels like.

01:41:44.000 So I rolled with him.

01:41:45.000 And it was incredible.

01:41:46.000 I'd never felt, you know, the guy told me he wrestled his whole life and he's been doing jujitsu a year.

01:41:52.000 I would have a way easier time with that guy than I did, especially when he weighs 140, 145 pounds.

01:41:58.000 It was incredible.

01:41:59.000 I've never felt anything like this.

01:42:01.000 And even the guys that were on his squad that were training 8 months, 10 months, it's like, wow!

01:42:07.000 Turbo and ozone?

01:42:07.000 I never felt anything like this.

01:42:09.000 It was incredible.

01:42:10.000 What did you say?

01:42:11.000 Turbo and ozone?

01:42:12.000 What does that mean?

01:42:13.000 That's from the movie Breaking.

01:42:14.000 Those were two...

01:42:17.000 So these exercises that they do, it's like they're doing one-handed handstands, getting into flying double lotus.

01:42:24.000 They're balancing on their head without spinning.

01:42:27.000 You know, the old school break dancers would spin and then they would balance like a top.

01:42:30.000 They just get on their head and their balance is so extraordinary.

01:42:33.000 It's unbelievable.

01:42:34.000 They do like Cirque du Soleil stuff.

01:42:36.000 Cirque du Soleil is the only time that I can ever remember as a man feeling.

01:42:40.000 I went with a chick and as I was in the audience watching it, I felt like inadequate.

01:42:47.000 I felt insecure.

01:42:49.000 I was like, I can't do that.

01:42:52.000 I think of myself as being a guy who's in good shape.

01:42:55.000 I'm fit.

01:42:55.000 I work out all the time.

01:42:56.000 But I'm watching these guys move around.

01:42:58.000 I'm like, whoa, that guy is doing a one-handed handstand.

01:43:01.000 His legs are going that way, and he's holding another man up in the air above him.

01:43:05.000 It was the craziest thing ever, the idea that someone could be that physically strong.

01:43:10.000 They're doing one-handed handstands, and I got this all on video.

01:43:13.000 I videotaped everything, all those guys.

01:43:14.000 It was unbelievable.

01:43:15.000 They do one-handed handstands, get into Flying Double Lotus, and start jumping and hopping on one hand.

01:43:22.000 It's incredible when you feel how strong they are.

01:43:25.000 I'm convinced that...

01:43:28.000 A lot of people separate balance exercises and then core exercises.

01:43:32.000 I think there's something about combining extreme core training, like they're doing all these handstands and balancing, and then combining extreme balance.

01:43:41.000 You put them together, I think that really does create a whole new animal, because I've never felt anything like this.

01:43:46.000 It's combining core exercises and extreme balance at the same time turns your body into something different.

01:43:53.000 It totally makes sense.

01:43:54.000 Something different.

01:43:54.000 If you think about it, the ability to manipulate your body in an extreme way.

01:43:59.000 Yoga alone makes you better at everything you do athletically.

01:44:04.000 It gives you much more control and you have a finer degree of movement where you can balance yourself better.

01:44:15.000 But that's way harder than yoga.

01:44:18.000 It's incredible.

01:44:19.000 It's extreme yoga.

01:44:22.000 Because there's a lot of yoga elements to it.

01:44:24.000 Their style is a combination of everything.

01:44:28.000 They're bringing kung fu in. 1.00

01:44:30.000 They're bringing breakdancing.

01:44:32.000 They're bringing yoga, putting it all together.

01:44:35.000 Cirque du Soleil.

01:44:36.000 It's incredible, these guys.

01:44:39.000 These guys are incredible.

01:44:40.000 I have seen some breakdancers do some wild-ass kung fu kicks. 0.99

01:44:44.000 They call themselves the freak showers.

01:44:46.000 I've seen break dancers do those flying flip kicks where they flip through the air and throw kicks at the same time. 0.99

01:44:52.000 Obviously, the way I look at it is you need a lot more base in wrestling than you do in Jiu Jitsu.

01:44:57.000 In Jiu Jitsu, the level of base that's required is not nearly as much as wrestling.

01:45:03.000 Wrestling is all about getting that top position.

01:45:05.000 It's all about balance.

01:45:06.000 It's all about base.

01:45:07.000 But this style of breakdancing requires 10 times more bass than a wrestler.

01:45:12.000 To do all these crazy things, the bass and the balance that's required is crazy.

01:45:18.000 So when they come back down and do Jiu Jitsu, the hardest part in Jiu Jitsu is getting the bass and the balance.

01:45:24.000 The moves are actually fairly easy to learn.

01:45:25.000 You could show a nine-year-old girl a rear naked choke and they could learn it in five minutes or less.

01:45:30.000 It's the balance and putting it all together and the coordination and the dexterity.

01:45:36.000 Man, when they come down and do jiu-jitsu, once they learn the basic object of the game in a couple passes, it's extraordinary.

01:45:43.000 It really is.

01:45:44.000 That's amazing.

01:45:45.000 What if that turns out to be the workout?

01:45:47.000 Extreme gymnastics, extreme breakdancing?

01:45:51.000 Fights are going to be so entertaining in the future.

01:45:54.000 You know what I mean?

01:45:54.000 It's going to be like choreographed.

01:45:56.000 This is the beginning of the infusion of this style of exercise into the 10th Planet system.

01:46:02.000 I'm sold.

01:46:03.000 I'm at the gym weightlifting.

01:46:05.000 I've been doing jujitsu 17 years and I'm doing squats and I'm doing weightlifting.

01:46:09.000 Yes, I'm stronger than if I wasn't doing it, but when you roll with a guy that's been doing jujitsu a year, And I got 20 pounds on him.

01:46:18.000 It's pretty extraordinary.

01:46:19.000 Everybody, like Rahsaan first told me, he goes, he went down there and did a seminar.

01:46:22.000 He goes, dude, have you rolled that Geo kid yet?

01:46:24.000 And I go, no.

01:46:25.000 He goes, dude, I couldn't get that guy.

01:46:27.000 That guy's, watch, wait till you roll with him.

01:46:30.000 It's incredible.

01:46:30.000 And it's not just him.

01:46:31.000 Like I said, the other guys, they were small dudes too.

01:46:34.000 They've been doing jujitsu eight months, ten months.

01:46:36.000 And yeah, I was getting them, but dude, I was going 100%.

01:46:39.000 It should have been really, really easy.

01:46:41.000 It wasn't really easy.

01:46:42.000 That's amazing.

01:46:43.000 It's incredible, man.

01:46:44.000 So I'm starting already.

01:46:46.000 I'm like, my balance is terrible.

01:46:48.000 I can't do handstands, but I'm practicing against walls.

01:46:51.000 I'm going to slowly infuse that into the system.

01:46:54.000 I'm going to make that my workout.

01:46:55.000 You know what else I heard is really good, too?

01:46:57.000 It's Pilates.

01:46:58.000 I think someone has a Pilates for grapplers.

01:47:01.000 Doesn't one of the Lloyd Irwin's dudes have a Pilates for grapplers DVD out or something like that?

01:47:07.000 I don't know.

01:47:08.000 But I read something about Pilates online.

01:47:10.000 There was some athlete who was looking to do something relaxing in between seasons.

01:47:14.000 He started doing Pilates, and he was talking about how ridiculously hard it is.

01:47:18.000 And people think it's easy, you know, because chicks are doing it. 1.00

01:47:21.000 Especially for a man, you know, carrying a different amount of weight, you know?

01:47:26.000 Pilates is supposed to be super awesome for you.

01:47:28.000 There's a lot of different things that you can do.

01:47:30.000 It's amazing how pliable and developable and engineerable the body is.

01:47:39.000 How you can force it to do certain things.

01:47:44.000 I'm a perfect example. 0.99

01:47:46.000 Growing up doing Taekwondo, my body still can do all that crazy shit. 0.98

01:47:50.000 Even if I took years off. 0.99

01:47:51.000 You gotta pee?

01:47:52.000 Yeah.

01:47:54.000 Your body adapts.

01:47:57.000 Like your body.

01:47:58.000 Yeah.

01:47:59.000 It's adapting.

01:48:00.000 It fits into a couch perfectly.

01:48:04.000 When you talk about being worried about your health as you get older, why don't you stop smoking cigarettes?

01:48:10.000 Because it's awesome.

01:48:10.000 I love it.

01:48:11.000 Is it really that good?

01:48:12.000 It's so great.

01:48:12.000 Why don't you try cigars?

01:48:14.000 That's worse for you. 1.00

01:48:15.000 That's like focusing all the fucking cancer into your mouth and throat and gums. 1.00

01:48:20.000 I don't think it is. 1.00

01:48:21.000 I think it gives you a little nicotine fix.

01:48:24.000 That's how Phil Hartman quit.

01:48:26.000 Quit smoking cigarettes by smoking cigars.

01:48:27.000 And I go, did you have to smoke all day?

01:48:29.000 He goes, no, I smoked one or two a day at the most.

01:48:32.000 It just gives you a little fix.

01:48:33.000 And then you can slowly wean yourself off of it.

01:48:35.000 Because what you're really hooked on, according to...

01:48:40.000 I don't know if this is true.

01:48:41.000 What you're really hooked on is not just the tobacco, but the 599 additives.

01:48:46.000 The way they've got it engineered, if you can still get tobacco into your system and nicotine into your system, you can slip away from the grips of addiction slowly.

01:48:54.000 They say it takes 10 years off of your life, though.

01:48:56.000 It's like, oh, who cares?

01:48:57.000 Who wants to live the extra 10 years of your life?

01:48:59.000 That's not what it is.

01:49:01.000 When you're 50, you feel like you're 60. When you're 60, you feel like you're 70. It doesn't just take 10 years off your life.

01:49:07.000 It makes you feel prematurely old and shitty. 0.99

01:49:11.000 You're cooking your body. 0.99

01:49:13.000 Enjoy it if you like it.

01:49:14.000 You say you love it.

01:49:15.000 Enjoy it.

01:49:16.000 Do you take a lot of vitamins to try to counteract the cigarettes?

01:49:20.000 I've been juicing.

01:49:20.000 I've been doing the juicing.

01:49:22.000 Wake up and do...

01:49:22.000 How many cigarettes a day?

01:49:24.000 A pack.

01:49:24.000 A whole pack now?

01:49:25.000 God damn, son. 1.00

01:49:27.000 You were only about 10 cigarettes a day for a while. 1.00

01:49:31.000 Well, that was right after I quit when I started back up again.

01:49:33.000 Because when you start back up, you don't go right to the full pack.

01:49:35.000 You slowly go, I'm only smoking 10 a day.

01:49:38.000 And then next thing you know, you're smoking... 1.00

01:49:40.000 You should go and do that Ibogaine shit. 1.00

01:49:42.000 Ibogaine. 1.00

01:49:44.000 Yeah, that's an addiction treatment.

01:49:46.000 Does that work for cigarettes?

01:49:47.000 It's supposed to be amazing for any addictions.

01:49:49.000 Not all of them.

01:49:50.000 There's certain pills that it doesn't work on benzos.

01:49:53.000 Really?

01:49:54.000 Yeah, there's certain things.

01:49:55.000 Like ayahuasca, for some reason... 0.95

01:49:59.000 something to do with alcohol like in brazil the people that are part of the ayahuasca religions they give their kids at 14 ayahuasca to prevent them from being an alcoholic so that's that's real shit so well that makes sense well i think that's because it's insightful because it lets you see it lets you you experience a deep spiritual connection with the mother earth and then you don't you don't want to be a fucking loser you know when you when you're in the presence of some form of divinity you know whatever the fuck the 0.99

01:50:27.000 the spirit of the ayahuasca is whatever it is when you have that that crazy experience whatever the fuck you're in the presence of you that that presence affects you forever I mean, that's essentially what these people are saying. 0.99

01:50:37.000 There's John Hopkins University study. 0.96

01:50:39.000 It changes their personality.

01:50:40.000 It makes them a different person.

01:50:41.000 I heard the Graham Hancock podcast, and when you guys were talking about ayahuasca, you guys were talking about how...

01:50:51.000 The spirit of ayahuasca, or whatever it is, is female, and you guys were into the, whatever you call it, the spirit world, or whatever that ayahuasca dimension is, what do you think that is?

01:51:08.000 I think, you know, when you were talking about there's information around us all the time and if we could have goggles, they could see all the fucking ones and zeros flying through the air and all the cellular signals and all the Wi-Fi.

01:51:20.000 I think it's very likely that we are just at a stop on the dial and that the reality of infinity is that there is an unlimited number of frequencies to tune into.

01:51:33.000 And it's not as simple as, you know, we live in one place.

01:51:36.000 I mean, we know...

01:51:37.000 According to quantum physicists, and I don't understand it, but I'll repeat what they say, is that there are 11 dimensions, 11 known dimensions provable somehow or another by some mathematics that I'll never understand.

01:51:48.000 So if that's the case, what does that mean? 0.74

01:51:50.000 If we know that we have time and space, and we know that the basic dimensions that we're comfortable with, what the fuck are these other ones? 0.98

01:51:57.000 What the fuck is... 0.99

01:51:58.000 What are those other... 0.99

01:51:59.000 And how do we know that this is just one sort of...

01:52:04.000 to discovering that, oh no, this is a part of another fractal and there are infinite numbers of different dimensions.

01:52:11.000 Because that to me seems just as likely as there's more than one.

01:52:13.000 I have a feeling that there's just an unlimited number of them, but we exist in one dimension.

01:52:19.000 We don't understand the other ones.

01:52:21.000 We can't tune into them and part of our brain can.

01:52:25.000 And part of our brain can when we sleep.

01:52:27.000 And part of our brain can.

01:52:28.000 And we think of traveling as a physical act of moving your tissue and your cells and your bones from one space to another space. 0.67

01:52:37.000 But that's silly. 0.99

01:52:39.000 What the fuck is imagination? 0.99

01:52:41.000 What are thoughts? 0.99

01:52:42.000 What are ideas?

01:52:43.000 What are language?

01:52:43.000 These are all things that are in the air.

01:52:45.000 These are all things that travel from people to people in the air.

01:52:48.000 But they create things and things become of them and empires get built because of using words and all this stuff comes from the human imagination.

01:52:57.000 And the human imagination is what tunes in when you're sleeping. 0.99

01:53:00.000 And it's where all these psychedelic compounds that are all created by your own body, that all interacts with all that shit. 0.99

01:53:06.000 And that's how things get done. 0.98

01:53:08.000 And that is why there is creativity.

01:53:11.000 It's the source of all of it.

01:53:13.000 The human imagination, the human mind is the source of all this craziness that we say, good and bad.

01:53:18.000 Yeah.

01:53:19.000 Based on all that, like all that craziness, what do you think?

01:53:23.000 What would you guess?

01:53:24.000 I think it's another dimension.

01:53:26.000 When you die, what do you think happens?

01:53:27.000 I think you go right to that DMT world, man.

01:53:29.000 So you think your soul is eternal?

01:53:31.000 I'm totally guessing.

01:53:32.000 If you had to guess, you would think the soul is eternal?

01:53:35.000 This is what I think.

01:53:36.000 I think the idea of you, it just stops.

01:53:39.000 It stops.

01:53:40.000 It ends.

01:53:41.000 I think the only reason why you and I, or I and all of us, anybody listening, the only reason why we think of ourselves as one is because of our ego.

01:53:48.000 And it's because of our desire to protect our biology and to breed.

01:53:53.000 We are programmed to seek out A breeding partner and reproduce.

01:53:58.000 It's all natural and it's all chemical and then there's all sorts of roles that we play in society to ensure that the best genetics and the ones that are moving forward the most are the ones that get to breed the most.

01:54:08.000 It's all like simple and scientific and it all seems to me to be a part of some sort of an engineered system.

01:54:16.000 An engineered system that's guaranteed to produce certain results.

01:54:20.000 You know how bacteria, they have their job, and every cell has its job, but you wouldn't think the bacteria is conscious of what it's doing to our bodies.

01:54:31.000 It's very important.

01:54:32.000 Do you think, like in this dimension, we're going around with our own lives, watching TV, doing our own thing, but on the other side, in another dimension, what we're doing, our energy, our frequency, is important.

01:54:48.000 Sure.

01:54:50.000 We might be a cold.

01:54:52.000 We might be a cold for another dimension.

01:54:55.000 That's what we might be.

01:54:56.000 We might be the negative energy that creeps through the cracks and fucks with their world because we're polluting our seas.

01:55:02.000 It just sounds super ultra crazy sophisticated and complicated.

01:55:09.000 It's too complicated.

01:55:10.000 And well organized.

01:55:12.000 It sounds very intelligent, doesn't it?

01:55:14.000 Well, I wouldn't say intelligent, but I would definitely say it follows a very specific direction.

01:55:20.000 I mean, whether or not it's aware of that direction is another question entirely.

01:55:24.000 And I think that that's really debatable. 0.99

01:55:26.000 I don't think a fucking caterpillar is aware that it's going to become a butterfly. 0.99

01:55:30.000 And I don't think a human being is necessarily aware of why the fuck all we're doing is moving towards a certain direction. 1.00

01:55:37.000 No one is. 0.94

01:55:38.000 So I wouldn't say it's intelligent.

01:55:40.000 I would say it's a direction.

01:55:41.000 It's a very specific direction.

01:55:43.000 The only time I feel like a contact with intelligence, like real divine intelligence, is psychedelic experiences. 0.99

01:55:50.000 Those are the only time I feel humbled by something, however the fuck it is, way smarter than me. 0.94

01:55:56.000 Even if it's just some sort of a chemical reaction in my mind, boy, the ultimate wisdom displayed by that chemical reaction is not just tangible, but you carry it with you the rest of your life. 0.97

01:56:06.000 You carry those thoughts and what you've learned from those experiences the rest of your life.

01:56:10.000 And that's what they found in this John Hopkins study on psilocybin mushrooms.

01:56:13.000 And that's what you've experienced in your life.

01:56:15.000 That's what I've experienced in my life.

01:56:16.000 You can't tell me it's not happening that way.

01:56:19.000 You're tuning into some other incredible intelligence and you're going, oh, okay.

01:56:24.000 Like, I was taking myself seriously. 0.98

01:56:25.000 I was being ridiculous. 0.83

01:56:26.000 I was thinking I was important. 0.95

01:56:27.000 I was thinking I was special.

01:56:28.000 I was thinking I was, you know, I was right and everyone's wrong. 0.99

01:56:30.000 Like, whoa, you don't know jack shit. 0.99

01:56:33.000 And you have a few of those and you feel that. 0.99

01:56:35.000 I had this crazy dream a couple weeks ago that...

01:56:39.000 Me and my girlfriend were at the house I grew up in, and she's in the backyard screaming. 0.86

01:56:45.000 It's nighttime.

01:56:45.000 It's late at night.

01:56:46.000 She's screaming, come back here, come back here!

01:56:48.000 And I thought something was wrong with the baby or something.

01:56:50.000 So I run out in the backyard, and she's looking up at the sky.

01:56:55.000 And then I look up in the sky and you see all these intelligent shooting stars.

01:57:00.000 It was full disclosure.

01:57:02.000 It was all these beams of light with algorithms and equations and chemtrails in this fancy handwriting and chemtrails in hieroglyphics and all the answers. 0.99

01:57:15.000 And we're just standing there going, shit! 0.99

01:57:18.000 All the equations. 1.00

01:57:19.000 It just came out.

01:57:20.000 What?

01:57:21.000 What? 0.98

01:57:22.000 What the hell? 0.97

01:57:23.000 What were you on? 0.99

01:57:24.000 I was dreaming.

01:57:25.000 But did you take anything before you went to bed?

01:57:27.000 No.

01:57:28.000 I mean, I smoked weed, but that's about it.

01:57:30.000 You sure you didn't take Alpha Brain, Eddie?

01:57:32.000 Alpha Brain will give you crazy lucid dreams. 0.97

01:57:35.000 That's an Alpha Brain commercial right there.

01:57:38.000 Alpha Brain gives you crazy lucid dreams. 1.00

01:57:39.000 You can cut that shit and just use it like in Howard Stern. 1.00

01:57:42.000 Were you taking Alpha Brain when you had that? 1.00

01:57:43.000 No.

01:57:44.000 Do you have an extra bottle?

01:57:45.000 I want one.

01:57:46.000 I want your honest, unbiased opinion about this.

01:57:50.000 Definitely. 0.92

01:57:52.000 What would fucking happen if, like, there was just full disclosure. 0.98

01:57:57.000 Like, you just hear, like, aliens from the next star system just said, okay, this is what's going down. 0.98

01:58:02.000 You've been part of this, you know, breeding, or whatever.

01:58:06.000 You're part of this Galactic Federation.

01:58:08.000 It's 2012. This is what's going on.

01:58:10.000 And the whole history of us was just thrust upon us.

01:58:15.000 Well, imagine if our entire civilization was just the interstellar version of SeaWorld.

01:58:22.000 We're SeaWorld for aliens. 0.88

01:58:23.000 Exactly.

01:58:24.000 So you find this out, and they tell you...

01:58:26.000 They tell you...

01:58:27.000 No, I don't even want to get into it, because it's just...

01:58:30.000 Why?

01:58:31.000 You don't want to get into it?

01:58:33.000 What do you mean?

01:58:33.000 No, it's just...

01:58:34.000 I don't want to get into it, but it just...

01:58:37.000 Man, what...

01:58:38.000 What's going to happen when eventually...

01:58:40.000 What happened right there where you said you don't want to get into it?

01:58:41.000 Nah, it's a long story. 0.99

01:58:42.000 Because then this guy came in the room and he started taking off his clothes and I started slowly sucking his... 0.98

01:58:47.000 How would people react if... 0.99

01:58:48.000 Because if the entire truth...

01:58:52.000 If it wasn't even aliens, what if our government said, okay, this is what's going on. 0.52

01:58:56.000 This is the history of the solar system.

01:58:58.000 This is the history of the Galactic Federation.

01:58:59.000 We're actually part of this giant federation...

01:59:02.000 We were just left alone for a few hundred thousand years to get to a certain point.

01:59:06.000 Now we're part of this. 1.00

01:59:07.000 Now we need to move everybody to another planet because an asteroid's coming, so we need to get on some fucking goddamn ships. 1.00

01:59:14.000 You know what I mean? 0.99

01:59:15.000 Could you imagine if UFOs actually came from the ocean?

01:59:20.000 What if they all come from the ocean?

01:59:22.000 What if we don't know it, but there's an intelligent species that is way older than us that figured out the best way to exist is to dig trenches deep into the ocean.

01:59:33.000 They have these deep underwater civilizations, so they're completely cut off from all the rest of the fish and all the wildlife, so they got completely removed from the food chain, much like we did by not living in the jungles.

01:59:43.000 How we moved in the cities? 0.99

01:59:45.000 They just built these fucking things down underground, and they became super sophisticated, and they controlled their environment like no other animal in the ocean, and they built fucking ships. 0.99

01:59:54.000 And they shoot those ships out into the... 1.00

01:59:55.000 And those ships look like dolphins.

01:59:56.000 And no, they're actually octopus, and all the octopus that we see are ones that got away.

02:00:02.000 Emperor Spongebob.

02:00:03.000 If something came from another planet, if something was so smart that it came from another planet, you would think that it would be able to hide itself.

02:00:09.000 You would think that's just...

02:00:10.000 Of course.

02:00:10.000 We're going to figure that out before we figure out interplanetary travel.

02:00:14.000 We're going to figure out cloaking.

02:00:15.000 Because if you pay attention, they're pretty close to cloaking.

02:00:17.000 They figured out a way to make a tank.

02:00:19.000 It broadcasts something.

02:00:20.000 It projects it on the side of the tank so it looks like the walls behind it. 1.00

02:00:24.000 It's fucking crazy shit. 1.00

02:00:26.000 Yeah, that's what I'm saying. 1.00

02:00:26.000 It's crazy shit. 1.00

02:00:27.000 So they're pretty close to figuring out how to do that and make it look really good. 0.99

02:00:32.000 Because if you think about the first one megapixel camera, I had one, dude.

02:00:36.000 It was a brick.

02:00:37.000 It was a one megapixel digital camera.

02:00:39.000 It was a brick.

02:00:40.000 And now your phone has an eight megapixel camera or even more.

02:00:43.000 How about when they master your thoughts and your dreams and you could sell your dreams and badass dudes that are lucid dreamers and they create amazing...

02:00:51.000 It's like watching a martial arts movie.

02:00:56.000 You watch MMA now.

02:00:58.000 Why are we going to watch Jeff Speakman?

02:00:59.000 Why are we going to watch Steven Seagal? 1.00

02:01:01.000 We got the real shit. 1.00

02:01:02.000 And then when you start watching real dreams, you download them, boom. 1.00

02:01:06.000 What was that movie with Juliette Lewis?

02:01:09.000 What if the dude was completely crazy and you run the risk of becoming crazy by following his dreams? 0.99

02:01:16.000 But there's a few dudes who are just fucking their dreams are so awesome. 0.99

02:01:19.000 You're like, I'll fucking risk it. 1.00

02:01:21.000 And you want to ride dragons through the fucking cosmos and shit. 1.00

02:01:24.000 This guy has these ridiculous, vivid, multi-color sorcerer dreams. 1.00

02:01:30.000 Strange days, right? 0.99

02:01:32.000 Strange days.

02:01:33.000 Yeah, Strange Days is similar to that.

02:01:35.000 When you got that technology, like mastering your thoughts and your dreams into a DVD combined with virtual reality technology, where now you can get inside someone else's dream, and then they'll do real-time, like webcam dreams.

02:01:51.000 You go into their dreams as they're dreaming.

02:01:54.000 Well, that shit that I was talking about from Gizmodo where they recorded the dreams, that's very close to that. 0.97

02:01:59.000 They've already done it? 1.00

02:02:01.000 I want to see what the fuck that looks like. 0.99

02:02:04.000 What about when they figure out a way to actually force you to dream? 0.99

02:02:08.000 What if they figure out a way to trigger dreaming?

02:02:11.000 Like they figure out a way to somehow or another, they activate something in your mind and whatever chemicals that are released in whatever situation becomes artificial, like instantaneous.

02:02:20.000 They can make you dream.

02:02:23.000 This video is showing what they recorded from brain activity on the right side while they're watching it. 1.00

02:02:31.000 Whoa, that image of the fucking guy? 1.00

02:02:34.000 Keep playing that. 1.00

02:02:35.000 That's insane.

02:02:36.000 So on the right side is what the brain is seeing.

02:02:38.000 On the left side is what the person's watching. 0.99

02:02:41.000 Damn, that's incredible. 0.99

02:02:42.000 That's insane. 1.00

02:02:43.000 Yeah, it's on Gizmodo.

02:02:45.000 It's under...

02:02:46.000 There's a lot of people that are worried about this, right?

02:02:48.000 Gizmodo.

02:02:49.000 Scientists reconstruct brains' visions into digital video and historic experiment.

02:02:52.000 That's the ultimate right there.

02:02:53.000 A lot of people are worried about this.

02:02:55.000 They're worried about this ultimate conversion of people and machine and that it's happening way quicker than we think it is.

02:03:00.000 When you look up and you realize that stuff like that is taking place right under your nose and you didn't know about it, you're like, oh my God.

02:03:07.000 What is next?

02:03:10.000 Somehow or another, we're going to be able to read each other's minds.

02:03:13.000 We're going to go right into each other's brains, and we're all going to become one organism.

02:03:17.000 We're going to really recognize ourselves as one. 1.00

02:03:20.000 Yeah, talking's going to be fucking for idiots. 1.00

02:03:23.000 You know, it's just going to be telepathy. 1.00

02:03:24.000 You take telepathy 101. They're going to run into people that still talk.

02:03:28.000 We're going to be like shaking our head at them.

02:03:30.000 Living in the bush in Australia.

02:03:32.000 We like talking, mate.

02:03:34.000 You'll laugh at those people but without any facial expressions.

02:03:37.000 You just laugh in your head.

02:03:38.000 And that's the time we could talk to the dolphins and animals and be Dr. Do that all.

02:03:41.000 Do you think that's what aliens stand for?

02:03:43.000 The archetype of the alien with the big giant head and the big eyes and the emotionless face? 0.92

02:03:48.000 All that emotion outside is all just necessary only because we're shitty at communicating.

02:03:53.000 And once we're able to communicate completely through the mind, we won't need anything anymore.

02:03:58.000 So what do you think that represents?

02:04:00.000 It represents our inevitable future?

02:04:01.000 Our encoded end?

02:04:03.000 It's gotta be.

02:04:03.000 I wonder.

02:04:04.000 That's just the way it goes.

02:04:05.000 Technology marches on at a staggering pace.

02:04:08.000 If you look at us compared to chimps, right?

02:04:10.000 I mean, we're not done.

02:04:12.000 It's very clear that human beings are some sort of a work in progress.

02:04:15.000 And if you look at us compared to chimps, the big mystery in the fossil record is the doubling of the human brain size that it doubled over a period of two million years.

02:04:24.000 And they don't know why.

02:04:25.000 They don't know what it was.

02:04:26.000 Ununucky.

02:04:26.000 Bad math.

02:04:27.000 Whatever the fuck it could be. 0.98

02:04:28.000 In the old days? 0.99

02:04:29.000 No, they wouldn't count right.

02:04:31.000 How many deer we kill?

02:04:34.000 I thought it was two.

02:04:36.000 So if you think about what we became from the monkey origin, you know, the original...

02:04:43.000 You know, lower primates, what we became with our bigger head.

02:04:46.000 Well, if it's going to keep moving in that same direction, we're going to have big, giant heads. 0.98

02:04:49.000 And if you look at the muscles that are on chimps, and then you look at a scrawny-ass average American male, you know, who doesn't exercise and just works in a fucking cubicle all day, their scrawny body is very much like the scrawny body of an alien. 0.96

02:05:02.000 So if you keep going in that direction, that's exactly what they come out like. 0.99

02:05:05.000 You come out like some fucking giant brainiac with little twig limbs that can't get anything done. 0.99

02:05:11.000 No jujitsu at all. 1.00

02:05:13.000 No sprawl.

02:05:14.000 Everything you've ever happened you can get without a facial expression and without a sound, without a peep.

02:05:20.000 You can get all that.

02:05:21.000 You can have so much fun just in your head.

02:05:23.000 You just go into other people's head and you just like, you know, go into a trance and you just get all this information and go through all their memories.

02:05:30.000 You look at someone else and go through their child and go, man...

02:05:33.000 I love hanging out with you, but in telepathy, just going through everyone's life.

02:05:37.000 I wonder if that's what it is.

02:05:39.000 And then you learn to block your thoughts. 1.00

02:05:41.000 You'd be like the best masturbation site. 0.95

02:05:44.000 I'm going to Eddie's site and just be like, yeah! 0.99

02:05:46.000 I wonder if that's what aliens are.

02:05:48.000 I wonder if aliens have figured out what they are as real things that we're never going to have real evidence about because they don't exist in this dimension and they interdimensional travel.

02:05:57.000 They just figured out how to tune into different dimensions. 0.99

02:06:00.000 So they can come here, hang for a little while, and fucking vamoose. 0.96

02:06:03.000 But they do it in a way that almost is undetectable, or that our instruments can't really pick up, because they're not even from here. 0.96

02:06:10.000 So they'll show up as ghosts of discs flying through the sky, and we barely register them, because what we're getting is static.

02:06:18.000 It's like we're watching one station on TV, and it's not quite tuned in, and another one comes in, and it's in Mexican.

02:06:24.000 That's what we're getting.

02:06:25.000 We're getting some bleed-over from another dimension, and that's what UFOs are.

02:06:30.000 Does Bob Lazar have a Twitter?

02:06:32.000 Wouldn't that be cool to have him on your show? 1.00

02:06:34.000 I think he's full of shit. 1.00

02:06:36.000 He might be. 1.00

02:06:37.000 He knows a lot and he's fascinating, but I almost wonder if that guy's working for the government, if he's a disinformation agent.

02:06:43.000 Because he lied about going to MIT. He lied about shit that's really traceable. 0.99

02:06:48.000 But then he says that, oh, the government, you know. 0.99

02:06:51.000 Hit his records?

02:06:51.000 Yeah.

02:06:52.000 But that's not true because they found school books from people who went to school with him, supposedly, that were in those classes.

02:06:58.000 And there's no Babo Zarr.

02:07:00.000 There's old versions of the – I mean unless they went back in time and altered every single one of the yearbooks.

02:07:07.000 The government's not going to do that.

02:07:09.000 They would get caught so easily.

02:07:11.000 He didn't say anything like that crazy.

02:07:13.000 We already know that there were German UFOs.

02:07:17.000 It was probably some American one that he saw.

02:07:19.000 It doesn't mean it was alien.

02:07:21.000 It could be some U.S. Air Force UFO that he saw.

02:07:24.000 That's not what he's saying, though.

02:07:25.000 What he's saying is it's absolutely alien.

02:07:27.000 When they were hired, they were hired to back-engineer it.

02:07:30.000 His whole story is...

02:07:32.000 If you don't know who Robert Lazar is, Robert Lazar is a guy who claimed to have worked for Area 51. The story is he had this job there.

02:07:39.000 He became fascinated.

02:07:40.000 He was a scientist, and he started helping them work with their aliens or these alien spacecraft that they had, and they were trying to reconstruct them.

02:07:50.000 But while this all was going on, they have to know everything you're doing.

02:07:53.000 So they monitor all your phone calls, and they found out that his wife was cheating on him. 1.00

02:07:57.000 And so they go, this motherfucker's gonna be emotionally unstable. 1.00

02:08:00.000 We gotta kick him out of the program because he's got turmoil in his life. 1.00

02:08:04.000 So they fired him abruptly.

02:08:05.000 He didn't understand why.

02:08:07.000 They wouldn't explain to him why.

02:08:08.000 They fired him.

02:08:09.000 And so the guy started bringing his friends around to watch the UFOs get launched.

02:08:13.000 And that's when he got arrested.

02:08:14.000 And that's when he started telling his story.

02:08:16.000 You know, he started telling his story about how he worked there and they hired him to back engine.

02:08:19.000 It sounds awesome when you listen to him talk. 0.82

02:08:21.000 Yeah, and when he does, when he breaks down science and all these equations and shit. 0.82

02:08:26.000 It's amazing. 1.00

02:08:26.000 I mean, man, he's an amazing liar. 1.00

02:08:28.000 If he doesn't know what the fuck he's talking about but he's going off with it, he's saying some incredible shit about anti-gravity and all this crazy shit. 1.00

02:08:35.000 It almost makes me think that he's a plant and that he was hired to do this because it makes UFOs look silly. 0.99

02:08:42.000 Because when you look into the guy and he says all these fantastic things and then you find out that he actually never really went to MIT and he lied about his past and they can't find any record of him anywhere and Maybe he worked at Los Alamos. 0.98

02:08:54.000 Who the fuck knows what he did there? 0.97

02:08:55.000 But he wasn't involved in any Area 51 bullshit. 0.99

02:08:58.000 This is, of course, obviously what the government says. 0.99

02:09:01.000 But it makes him look ridiculous. 0.97

02:09:03.000 It makes him look silly if he lied about where he went to school. 1.00

02:09:06.000 So maybe if you wanted to end speculation about any particular area, whether or not UFOs were there, you have some guy tell some crazy story about it and then make sure that he's full of shit. 0.99

02:09:17.000 Make sure he's full of shit about other things. 0.99

02:09:19.000 So people investigate. 1.00

02:09:21.000 When a fantastical story, they have to investigate. 1.00

02:09:24.000 And they investigate and they find out that he's full of shit. 1.00

02:09:26.000 And it makes the whole thing seem silly. 1.00

02:09:28.000 But we know for a fact they definitely test weapons there.

02:09:31.000 And there's videos that people have shot back before.

02:09:34.000 They extended the range of where you're prohibited to travel.

02:09:39.000 You used to be able to get much closer to Area 51. But people would go to this certain ridge and they would film all these different things flying through the air.

02:09:46.000 Fuck! 1.00

02:09:46.000 Fucking crazy things taking all these right angle turns in the middle of the sky. 1.00

02:09:50.000 And what most people think is that that's where they were initially practicing with drones and that those things that were glowing in the sky, the reason why they look like UFOs is like this is the reason why they move so haphazardly through the sky. 0.97

02:10:02.000 These were all radio controlled and they really didn't have it down yet. 0.96

02:10:06.000 And we know now they have drones down to a fucking science. 0.68

02:10:09.000 And now the drone technology has gotten to the point. 1.00

02:10:12.000 Yeah, they killed that guy, that American-born terrorist. 0.99

02:10:15.000 They killed a couple of them, I guess.

02:10:16.000 But can the drones move like those lights did that they captured?

02:10:23.000 I don't know.

02:10:24.000 I don't know.

02:10:25.000 They seem to be...

02:10:26.000 I don't think so.

02:10:26.000 They seem to be just like model airplanes.

02:10:28.000 Yeah, those are just model airplanes.

02:10:30.000 Yeah, so I don't know about the drone theory.

02:10:31.000 Well, you've got to think about what these drones are for.

02:10:34.000 These drones are carrying missiles.

02:10:35.000 They're just the weight alone.

02:10:37.000 If you have something that it's in...

02:10:38.000 Say if you have something and you're flying around some magnetic... 0.81

02:10:44.000 Some new next level anti-gravity fucking ball of steel and we figured out how to pilot this thing, but it's not that accurate. 0.89

02:10:53.000 It works on magnetic waves and it's all fucking nutty, but it glows and it flies all around. 0.86

02:10:58.000 There's no one in it, so it can take crazy g-force turns in the sky.

02:11:02.000 It's very possible that that's a completely different thing, but that they learn from that.

02:11:06.000 And they apply specific things that they learn from that into these other drones that they make.

02:11:11.000 But the other drones that they make are often just based on artificially powered planes, which they've had forever.

02:11:17.000 And that was the part of Operation Northwinds.

02:11:19.000 They were going to blow up a drone plane. 0.99

02:11:21.000 They already had the ability to launch a fucking plane into the sky just using remote control. 0.99

02:11:27.000 So I think that it's entirely possible that all that shit that people saw around Nevada, it's like things that the government experimented on. 0.99

02:11:34.000 And that you have a guy like Robert Lazar who comes and says all this crazy shit about UFOs and turns out he's a liar, and then it makes the whole idea of UFOs being there to be nonsense. 0.98

02:11:45.000 And then people just want to leave it alone. 0.97

02:11:46.000 I think it's more of a place where they keep seeds, keep certain animals, almost like a Noah's Ark.

02:11:52.000 Yeah, like a civilization.

02:11:54.000 Why do you think that?

02:11:55.000 Because they have to do that.

02:11:57.000 The government has to do that?

02:11:58.000 Yeah.

02:11:58.000 I mean, don't you think they have...

02:11:59.000 Like, they've already bought, like, seeds-wise, the government has already bought, like, almost every single seed possible, you know?

02:12:06.000 And that's to keep it...

02:12:07.000 Isn't it to keep it, like, pure, to, like, always have...

02:12:10.000 Where have you heard this?

02:12:11.000 Where are you getting this information from?

02:12:12.000 I don't know.

02:12:13.000 I saw something online about how the government bought...

02:12:15.000 All the seeds?

02:12:16.000 All the seeds.

02:12:17.000 All the huge companies.

02:12:19.000 So they have, like, a Noah's Ark situation?

02:12:20.000 Or one company bought all these seeds.

02:12:22.000 In Norway, they got that.

02:12:23.000 They have like billions of seeds that they got stored.

02:12:26.000 Yeah.

02:12:26.000 That's like a news.

02:12:28.000 They got Norway seed storage.

02:12:31.000 Really?

02:12:31.000 A giant.

02:12:32.000 So they're preparing for the end of the world.

02:12:33.000 Oh, yeah.

02:12:34.000 Yeah.

02:12:34.000 I think that's a fact.

02:12:35.000 I think that's...

02:12:36.000 It's close to probably what it is.

02:12:37.000 It's just to be in the middle of the United States.

02:12:40.000 Apparently, Norway has the biggest underground bunkers, too.

02:12:44.000 Over 33 square miles.

02:12:46.000 That's the rumor.

02:12:47.000 Norway's the biggest.

02:12:48.000 It could house a million people for two years.

02:12:54.000 Really?

02:12:55.000 Well, I know there's some place in the Palm Springs desert.

02:12:57.000 There's some guy, they had him on TV and he was talking about it.

02:13:00.000 They've set up apartments there and people buy them and they're like quarter million bucks and you own an apartment underground.

02:13:06.000 Oh yeah, they have that. 0.99

02:13:07.000 You can find that shit on the internet, dude. 0.99

02:13:09.000 They're abandoned missile silos that they're making like communities and shit and they won't let just anybody. 0.99

02:13:16.000 I have a friend who actually looked into it and he wants to spend the money. 0.89

02:13:19.000 The problem is...

02:13:21.000 How are you going to get there? 0.99

02:13:22.000 How are you going to get there when a fucking tidal wave comes? 0.97

02:13:26.000 Even if you could get there, there's communities that they're building. 0.98

02:13:32.000 Do you have to have some kind of skill to even buy one?

02:13:35.000 How are you going to contribute to this community?

02:13:37.000 You've got to pass all these tests and these interviews.

02:13:39.000 Then they take 50 grand or whatever. 1.00

02:13:42.000 When shit goes down... 1.00

02:13:44.000 And I'm at the front door, are you going to open the goddamn door for me? 1.00

02:13:48.000 You know what I mean? 0.99

02:13:49.000 The only way that would work is if everyone had their own private entrance and you had your own key to it.

02:13:55.000 You know what I mean? 1.00

02:13:56.000 But, fuck. 1.00

02:13:58.000 Because if you open up the door and then the horde of zombies came in behind you and killed everybody in the thing. 1.00

02:14:02.000 Yeah, I could totally see them like, don't fucking open the door for nobody. 1.00

02:14:05.000 Some shit went down. 0.99

02:14:06.000 Yeah, like apartment complexes. 0.99

02:14:07.000 Remember when you lived, if you ever lived in an apartment complex, someone leaves the door open and people get in and break into people's houses?

02:14:11.000 And that's what happens.

02:14:12.000 Yeah, yeah.

02:14:13.000 Like, I wouldn't trust that.

02:14:14.000 They'll take your money now?

02:14:16.000 Yeah.

02:14:16.000 That seems too sketchy, unless you live in it.

02:14:18.000 Unless you're a compound guy, like you got a house.

02:14:21.000 Like, you remember, I don't know if you heard about this, there was a house in Italy, and they suspected this guy of having some sort of an underground military bunker because he had moved a bunch of dirt out of there, and there had been years and years of construction.

02:14:33.000 And so the Italian government threatened him. 0.99

02:14:35.000 They're like, dude, we're going to burn your fucking house down and kill you. 1.00

02:14:38.000 Like, tell us what the fuck is going on in your basement. 1.00

02:14:40.000 Like, they were threatened by this guy. 0.99

02:14:41.000 Well, they went into his basement and he had this incredible artistically designed temple.

02:14:46.000 It's all different styles of art.

02:14:48.000 When I say artistically designed, it wasn't like by happenstance.

02:14:51.000 It was like engineered and planned, these huge caverns, like thousands and thousands and thousands of square feet.

02:14:57.000 And it's like one room is in an Egyptian theme and the other room is in this incredible other beautiful theme.

02:15:02.000 Was he preparing for the end of the world? 0.99

02:15:04.000 I don't know, but he built this fucking thing under his house. 0.99

02:15:06.000 He built a whole different world under his house. 0.99

02:15:09.000 It's amazing, man.

02:15:11.000 It's amazing.

02:15:12.000 People are always trying to build things and hide from people because they're worried about the inevitable collapse.

02:15:18.000 Just get a nice spot down in the middle of the earth.

02:15:21.000 Air is pumped up through a straw. - They're definitely building bigger and bigger bunkers and they're turning into cities.

02:15:27.000 That's just natural. 0.99

02:15:28.000 If I was the ruler of the world, I would just have people on the case nonstop keep building that shit deeper and deeper and deeper. 1.00

02:15:35.000 Keep building it. 0.99

02:15:37.000 You know what I mean? 0.97

02:15:37.000 Because if you're running shit and you have the power and the unlimited resource to build some safety, of course it's just natural human behavior It's the human condition to dig underground and be safe. 0.97

02:15:49.000 If you could, if you could, if you had all the money, shit, just keep digging. 0.99

02:15:52.000 If you were doing that, though, you literally might be some of the last people on Earth. 0.99

02:15:56.000 What a crazy responsibility that would feel. 0.51

02:15:59.000 If you knew that the whole world got wiped out, but you were inside some fucking thing, and that you had a 90% chance, and once you got out, the radiation had died down enough so that you could survive... 0.86

02:16:10.000 We've got to survive two years under there. 0.99

02:16:12.000 If the government came up to you and said, Joe, we need you to keep your mouth shut, man.

02:16:18.000 You and your family can all come down.

02:16:20.000 What is it, an asteroid coming? 0.89

02:16:23.000 It's coming, but you've just got to shut up about it.

02:16:25.000 We just can't fit everybody.

02:16:27.000 We can't fit everybody in.

02:16:28.000 You and your family, just...

02:16:30.000 Pipe down.

02:16:31.000 I never thought of it that way.

02:16:31.000 Would you do it?

02:16:32.000 You have to wonder who you want to live with.

02:16:35.000 You and your family. 1.00

02:16:36.000 It might be better to just die. 1.00

02:16:38.000 It might be better to find out where the asteroid's going to hit and drive there. 0.99

02:16:43.000 That might be the move, man. 1.00

02:16:44.000 Living underground with a bunch of fucking other savages. 1.00

02:16:47.000 I think naturally we have that drive. 1.00

02:16:50.000 We want to live.

02:16:51.000 We're always reaching out.

02:16:52.000 No matter what, we're trying to live.

02:16:53.000 We have a responsibility to keep this race going. 0.61

02:16:56.000 I never thought about it.

02:16:56.000 If you were creating a Noah's Ark, what animals you would...

02:16:59.000 Because you wouldn't do every single animal.

02:17:01.000 You would keep the ones that were the most important, like chickens...

02:17:04.000 Dude, I would just do nothing but bunnies, bro. 0.99

02:17:06.000 Just rats.

02:17:07.000 It would be chickens, cows... 0.95

02:17:09.000 The idea of being able to actually hold all the animals in one place is ridiculous.

02:17:14.000 However, the idea of being able to hold the genetic information for all the animals in one place is absolutely doable.

02:17:20.000 If there was ever a Noah's Ark in the real life past of humanity, what it is is probably a DNA bank.

02:17:27.000 At one point in time, there was a high level of intelligence.

02:17:33.000 When Graham Hancock was on, he was talking about...

02:17:36.000 Like, intelligence must have reached very high levels and then got wiped out by some huge natural disaster.

02:17:42.000 And then people were sort of left to fend for themselves and kind of re-figure things out.

02:17:46.000 And some things never get figured out again, man.

02:17:48.000 Some people reached a certain direction, a certain level, and they reached it in Egypt in 3000 BC, and we still haven't hit that yet.

02:17:57.000 That makes sense to me.

02:17:58.000 That makes a lot of sense to me.

02:18:01.000 I know that my genes would want to keep going.

02:18:04.000 I would want to keep going.

02:18:06.000 But man, what kind of a life would that be?

02:18:08.000 The post-apocalyptic life? 1.00

02:18:10.000 That would suck a bit of a dick. 1.00

02:18:11.000 I would definitely do it. 1.00

02:18:12.000 I would try to live.

02:18:14.000 Yeah, I think I would too. 1.00

02:18:15.000 I would too, but fuck it would suck. 1.00

02:18:18.000 God damn. 1.00

02:18:18.000 And you were just supposed to try to make as many babies as possible, so you just had to find any girl you can and just come in her and just like, that'd be awesome. 1.00

02:18:26.000 Isn't it amazing though?

02:18:27.000 Isn't it amazing that our terrified world, what's the terrified world is that we would lose all of this.

02:18:34.000 We'd lose everything that we can bang on.

02:18:35.000 We could lose our houses and we'd be stuck with just needing to forage for food.

02:18:39.000 We can't go to stores.

02:18:41.000 We don't have trucks anymore.

02:18:42.000 Start over.

02:18:42.000 Everything start over.

02:18:43.000 Start over.

02:18:44.000 We're terrified of starting over. 0.99

02:18:45.000 Every other animal starts over every fucking day of the week. 0.99

02:18:48.000 We're terrified of it. 0.99

02:18:49.000 We are so connected to devices and inventions and technology that the idea of being alone in nature forever is fucking horrific. 0.95

02:19:01.000 That's horrific. 0.98

02:19:01.000 That's jail. 0.98

02:19:02.000 You'd rather go to jail and get fed four square meals a day.

02:19:05.000 And at least if your bunkie's a good guy and you can play chess together.

02:19:08.000 You know? 0.98

02:19:10.000 What if you were allowed, like, what if the government said, okay, we got one year, this motherfucker's gonna hit us, everybody build your own bunker in the backyard, and everyone just started building. 0.99

02:19:20.000 You know how rich Mexicans would be? 0.99

02:19:25.000 They'd be charging a lot of money, man.

02:19:27.000 Why?

02:19:28.000 Because they'd be the ones doing it.

02:19:29.000 They'd be the ones digging the bunkers?

02:19:31.000 They'd be charging 150 an hour.

02:19:33.000 Well, I think they'd want their own bunker, man. 1.00

02:19:36.000 They'd be like, fuck you. 1.00

02:19:37.000 Money doesn't mean anything when an asteroid's coming. 1.00

02:19:39.000 And they tell you how deep it's gotta be.

02:19:40.000 It's gotta be, you know...

02:19:42.000 They already have their tunnels.

02:19:43.000 30 yards deep.

02:19:44.000 You know, it's coming.

02:19:45.000 You got one year.

02:19:46.000 Everybody would be digging, man.

02:19:48.000 They'd have instructions.

02:19:50.000 Everyone has their instructions from the government. 1.00

02:19:52.000 Build your own shit. 1.00

02:19:53.000 You have a year. 1.00

02:19:54.000 Could you imagine if you were underground and everyone's locked down and you're all waiting?

02:19:57.000 There's a countdown.

02:19:59.000 And you know that it's supposed to happen within the minute.

02:20:01.000 You got video cameras?

02:20:02.000 No video cameras.

02:20:04.000 You're in a bunker.

02:20:04.000 You're underground.

02:20:05.000 You're just waiting for the thump.

02:20:07.000 You're waiting for the impact of the earth.

02:20:09.000 You're waiting to hit it.

02:20:11.000 You just feel the whole thing just rattle and shake.

02:20:14.000 Everything just shake.

02:20:15.000 Could you imagine?

02:20:17.000 They say that the one that killed the dinosaurs, when it hit the earth, it was five miles deep in the first second and a half.

02:20:26.000 The first second and a half, it went five miles deep into the earth.

02:20:29.000 And these are the same people that measured the brain from the caveman time, right?

02:20:35.000 No, these are just regular... 1.00

02:20:37.000 No, it's totally different types of science, you fuckhead. 0.99

02:20:40.000 They just talk about what an impact that must have been like. 1.00

02:20:43.000 And if you were right there, you're fucked. 0.99

02:20:45.000 But if you were on the other side in your three-mile-deep bunker... 1.00

02:20:49.000 Five miles deep, yo.

02:20:50.000 You know how I do.

02:20:51.000 How much oxygen would you need?

02:20:53.000 You would have to have plants? 0.63

02:20:55.000 But would that even work?

02:20:56.000 Could you have an environment underground where you had plants and you generated electricity so that you could give the artificial sunlight to the plants and the plants cleaned up the carbon dioxide that you breathed out and gave you oxygen?

02:21:11.000 Would that be possible?

02:21:12.000 Could you develop an environment like that?

02:21:15.000 I don't know.

02:21:15.000 I wonder if they could do that, if they could figure out a way, if there's some method of power that they could harness, like say if they had some sort of an underground reactor.

02:21:24.000 So they got this underground reactor, and they got this set up for the fact it'll work for X amount of years, and blah blah blah, and they have a whole artificial world down there, and this reactor runs these lights, and they make it rain on these plants, and the plants breathe out oxygen, and we breathe out carbon dioxide, and they live off that Everyone makes their own underground bunker, and we've figured out a way, like we have a power source that's going to last for two years or whatever.

02:21:52.000 We could communicate with other people on these walkie-talkies and shit, and then you start digging to them, and you make little tunnels to them and shit, and other people try to jack you with their tunnels.

02:22:01.000 Like, dude, I don't want you in my life, dude. 0.98

02:22:03.000 Just go back.

02:22:04.000 Boom.

02:22:05.000 It's like digging like rabbits.

02:22:06.000 Jack in tunnels.

02:22:07.000 When people's tunnels cross, you have to put gates on your tunnels.

02:22:10.000 I live in a gated tunnel.

02:22:13.000 Where does all the poop go?

02:22:14.000 People just show up and tell them, no dude, I live in a totally gated tunnel.

02:22:17.000 You have gangs in these...

02:22:19.000 Guard gated tunnel.

02:22:20.000 That could be crazy, right?

02:22:22.000 Well, it's possible.

02:22:23.000 It's underground, man. 1.00

02:22:24.000 People breaking into your shit all the time from underneath. 1.00

02:22:26.000 It's going to be terrible. 1.00

02:22:27.000 If the power ever goes out under there, what a horrible way to die.

02:22:32.000 I would have a syringe ready to go for everyone in my family.

02:22:34.000 We all have a syringe. 1.00

02:22:35.000 If some shit goes down, just shoot that motherfucker. 1.00

02:22:39.000 And then just go to sleep and just fuck it. 1.00

02:22:41.000 And on that pretty note... 1.00

02:22:43.000 Thanks, Eddie.

02:22:46.000 We didn't even say your name.

02:22:48.000 Eddie Bravo.

02:22:48.000 Thank you very much.

02:22:50.000 We just started talking.

02:22:51.000 I'm going to be in Montreal in October.

02:22:54.000 I'm going to be at 10th Planet Vista.

02:22:56.000 Go to the Nibiru Forum at 10thPlanetJJ.com.

02:23:01.000 All my seminar information is there.

02:23:03.000 Thank you very much.

02:23:04.000 What was that, Brian?

02:23:05.000 I had a special effect on the song.

02:23:07.000 Montreal coming. 1.00

02:23:08.000 You're so silly. 1.00

02:23:09.000 This Friday, Houston, Texas. 1.00

02:23:11.000 The Verizon Wireless Theater with Brendan Walsh and Joey Diaz.

02:23:16.000 We're coming correct.

02:23:17.000 Correct. 0.99

02:23:18.000 We're slinging dick and passing out bubble gum, as Joey Diaz would say. 0.99

02:23:22.000 Nice. 0.98

02:23:23.000 If you're going to walk on ice, you might as well dance.

02:23:25.000 St. Louis in November.

02:23:28.000 Australia, Melbourne in December.

02:23:30.000 I'm going to do New Zealand.

02:23:30.000 Wait, where's your website?

02:23:31.000 They're not going to remember this.

02:23:32.000 Where's your website?

02:23:33.000 10thplanetjj.com Shazam!

02:23:34.000 Go to the forum.

02:23:35.000 That's where all the info's at.

02:23:36.000 If you're looking for a place to train, Legends in Hollywood is where it all goes down.

02:23:40.000 Come to California.

02:23:41.000 What's the address?

02:23:44.000 5176 Santa Monica Boulevard.

02:23:47.000 It's on the east side of Hollywood. 0.97

02:23:48.000 Big-ass gym.

02:23:49.000 We got X-Pole there. 0.59

02:23:50.000 We got pole dances.

02:23:51.000 We got jiu-jitsu.

02:23:52.000 I teach jiu-jitsu there.

02:23:53.000 That's 10th Planet Headquarters.

02:23:55.000 We got an excellent kickboxing gym.

02:23:57.000 We got an awesome MMA team.

02:23:59.000 Chris Riley is the MMA coach.

02:24:01.000 He's the head coach for the Legends MMA team.

02:24:04.000 And it even has creepy co-ed locker rooms.

02:24:06.000 Yeah.

02:24:07.000 Really?

02:24:08.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:24:09.000 It's the weirdest shit of all time. 1.00

02:24:11.000 The strippers are training with the animals. 1.00

02:24:14.000 Oh, it's done on purpose. 0.99

02:24:15.000 Yeah, the dudes are taking gnarly shits and they get out and girls are waiting to get in there. 0.99

02:24:18.000 I have more than one time taking a gnarly shit and then you get out and some poor girl is waiting to get in there and they're all in the bathroom and they're like, alright, good luck with that. 0.99

02:24:28.000 I didn't know this until recently, but we actually have the biggest strip pole class. 0.99

02:24:33.000 We have the longest poles.

02:24:35.000 That's what he said.

02:24:37.000 And I didn't know that.

02:24:38.000 I didn't know we had the most ultimate pole dancing school.

02:24:42.000 I hope you guys are insured to the gills from chicks falling on their heads. 1.00

02:24:44.000 Yeah.

02:24:44.000 I'm surprised it doesn't happen that often.

02:24:46.000 You hear about that Anderson Cooper thing?

02:24:47.000 Anderson Cooper's got a new daytime talk show, and he had some kid doing some skateboard stunt, and the kid fell on his head, and he's in critical condition. 0.99

02:24:54.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

02:24:54.000 He's fucked up. 1.00

02:24:55.000 The producer's like, come on, show us something crazy. 1.00

02:24:57.000 I know you can do something crazy. 1.00

02:24:58.000 So the kid does something crazy and falls and lands on his fucking head. 1.00

02:25:01.000 On the show. 1.00

02:25:02.000 God damn it. 0.99

02:25:03.000 Well, they didn't use it. 0.99

02:25:04.000 They didn't air it, but they did it for the show.

02:25:06.000 Wow.

02:25:06.000 Don't listen to Anderson Cooper, okay?

02:25:09.000 If he tells you to get crazy, think about what you're doing.

02:25:12.000 That's all I got to say.

02:25:16.000 The loop.

02:25:17.000 I missed the loop. 1.00

02:25:18.000 Fucking show's over, folks. 0.99

02:25:19.000 Thank you to The Fleshlight. 0.99

02:25:21.000 If you go to JoeRogan.net, click on the link for The Fleshlight.

02:25:23.000 Enter in the code name ROGAN. You will get 15% off the number one sex toy for men.

02:25:27.000 And if you're looking for Alpha Brain, go to Onnit.com and enter in the code name ROGAN. Save 10%.

02:25:35.000 I'm saving you money on your loads and your brain.

02:25:40.000 That's it.

02:25:40.000 The show's over.

02:25:42.000 We may have one tomorrow.

02:25:43.000 I don't know.

02:25:44.000 We've got to find a suitable guest.

02:25:46.000 And you're going to be a Comedy Juice at the Melrose Improv.

02:25:48.000 Oh yeah, tomorrow.

02:25:48.000 Comedy Juice at the Melrose Improv.

02:25:50.000 Tomorrow night. 1.00

02:25:50.000 I don't usually advertise that shit, son. 1.00

02:25:53.000 I just show up. 0.99

02:25:54.000 I'll be at Ice House Thursday.

02:25:56.000 Go! 0.95

02:25:57.000 Go crazy! 0.99

02:25:58.000 You gonna tell jokes? 0.58

02:25:59.000 Hey, I'm gonna be there with Ari Shafir and Freddie Lockhart for Comedy Juice at 10pm.

02:26:02.000 Oh, Thursday at the Ice House. 1.00

02:26:04.000 The small room is the shit, dude. 0.99

02:26:05.000 Are you doing it in the small room or in the big room? 1.00

02:26:07.000 No, the main room.

02:26:07.000 That's the small rooms.

02:26:08.000 I'm in love with that small room.

02:26:09.000 That 85-seater.

02:26:10.000 We're gonna be there a lot more often, ladies and gentlemen.

02:26:13.000 Thanks for everything. 0.57

02:26:13.000 Thank you everybody who came out to DC and wherever the fuck else I was. 0.57

02:26:16.000 Denver. 0.90

02:26:17.000 And we've been having a lot of fun.

02:26:19.000 And this weekend, Joey Diaz and Brandon Walsh at the Verizon Wireless.

02:26:23.000 Some tickets still available.

02:26:24.000 We're ready to come.

02:26:25.000 And then the next night's the UFC. Oh, it's going to be crazy.

02:26:28.000 Good UFC, too.

02:26:29.000 Thank you, Eddie Bravo.

02:26:30.000 Thank you very much.

02:26:31.000 10thplanetjj.com. 0.95

02:26:31.000 Oh, shit. 0.95

The Joe Rogan Experience - October 04, 2011

Joe Rogan Experience #144 - Eddie Bravo

Episode Stats

Summary

Transcript