The Joe Rogan Experience - Joe Rogan Experience #1505 - Hannibal Buress

00:00:00.000 Hello, Hannibal.

00:00:01.000 What's happening, man?

00:00:02.000 Good to see you, my friend.

00:00:03.000 Good to see you, too.

00:00:04.000 Last time I saw you, he was in Thailand.

00:00:06.000 It was in Thailand.

00:00:07.000 Dude, that was crazy.

00:00:08.000 That was two years ago?

00:00:10.000 2018, yeah.

00:00:11.000 Yeah, that was random.

00:00:13.000 That was very random.

00:00:14.000 That's so crazy, though.

00:00:16.000 We had dinner, hung out in Thailand.

00:00:18.000 I was like, this is wild.

00:00:19.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:00:20.000 It was in Chiang Mai.

00:00:23.000 Chiang Mai, yeah.

00:00:23.000 Yeah, I was doing Muay Thai.

00:00:25.000 Yeah, that's crazy.

00:00:26.000 So you just decided, just up and decided, I'm going to go there by myself for several months.

00:00:32.000 Just a month.

00:00:33.000 Oh, you what, for a month?

00:00:34.000 Yeah.

00:00:34.000 And train Muay Thai?

00:00:35.000 Yeah, I needed to...

00:00:37.000 I needed a reset after doing tag.

00:00:41.000 I wanted to kind of just reset my brain after doing so much press because it was a lot of press and a lot of just, you know, repetition.

00:00:51.000 And so I was like, I need to go...

00:00:53.000 Do something extreme to get into a totally different zone.

00:00:59.000 What was that?

00:01:00.000 Had you ever trained Muay Thai before then?

00:01:02.000 No.

00:01:02.000 I maybe took some classes.

00:01:05.000 The first day, so I went in Bangkok first.

00:01:09.000 I went to a small class.

00:01:11.000 I just went to one, and my camp was in Phuket.

00:01:15.000 And so all the gyms are outside.

00:01:20.000 So the warm-up, I was drenched in sweat in a 10-minute warm-up.

00:01:25.000 I was like, oh, this is good.

00:01:27.000 But it was...

00:01:28.000 It was dope, man.

00:01:30.000 I stayed on the camp for a little bit, so it was nice to just have that focus and live there and be there and just work out and lean into it.

00:01:43.000 It was cool.

00:01:44.000 How into it did you get?

00:01:45.000 Were you ever hitting the pads going, I think I should take a fight?

00:01:49.000 Nah, I didn't want to take a fight.

00:01:52.000 But it was some times where my kicks, I'm bowlegged, so my kicks are weird.

00:02:00.000 So doing a roundhouse, I wouldn't be able to, so my elbows...

00:02:04.000 We're decent in my knees.

00:02:06.000 And so some of the trainers, they started, that was my nickname.

00:02:11.000 It was Elbow.

00:02:12.000 Elbow!

00:02:13.000 Come on, Elbow! 1.00

00:02:14.000 But my kicks would be so weak.

00:02:16.000 They would be so weak.

00:02:17.000 It'd just hit the pad and it'd just have a pitiful sound.

00:02:21.000 It's not a thing that comes easily, especially when you're in your 30s and you're just starting to train.

00:02:27.000 Muay Thai, to move your legs like that and that kind of dexterity takes a while.

00:02:34.000 It's a slow, gradual build-up.

00:02:36.000 Yes, the hips have to be looser. 1.00

00:02:42.000 But I'm also bow-legged, so certain yoga things that I can't do or even sitting Indian style.

00:02:49.000 But you seem normal when you're walking around.

00:02:51.000 How are you bow-legged?

00:02:51.000 Because I know some dudes that are really bow-legged.

00:02:53.000 My walk is a little bit, it has a little bit to it.

00:02:57.000 And when I run, it gets really crazy.

00:03:00.000 I don't look how I think I look in my head.

00:03:04.000 While I'm walking, I think the music in my head is...

00:03:08.000 But my walk is kind of...

00:03:10.000 My walk is way weird.

00:03:13.000 I look on camera, who is that guy?

00:03:16.000 And what causes bow-leggedness?

00:03:18.000 Is it an anatomy thing?

00:03:19.000 I think it's an anatomy thing.

00:03:21.000 Let me see, stand up.

00:03:23.000 So yeah, so that my knees don't touch.

00:03:25.000 But you seem normal.

00:03:27.000 I'm not seeing anything weird.

00:03:28.000 It's not crazy, but it affects my roundhouse game.

00:03:34.000 I could help you with that.

00:03:35.000 I guarantee you.

00:03:36.000 I bet some stretches and some learning how to do it slowly.

00:03:41.000 The thing about roundhouse kicks and any kicks in general is people try to do them like fast.

00:03:48.000 You really want to learn them slow.

00:03:50.000 You want to learn, like, you got to resist the urge to try to hit things.

00:03:54.000 What you really want to do is just go through the motion, just go through the motion, just slow, and do that for a long period of time, like many, many, many weeks.

00:04:02.000 Okay.

00:04:03.000 Before, these guys try to like, and then you wind up kicking up, and you put all the strain on your ligaments, your supporting leg, because you're not pivoting. 1.00

00:04:11.000 They fuck themselves. 0.99

00:04:12.000 And then it's hard to unlearn that. 1.00

00:04:14.000 See, when you learn something, if you learn it wrong, like when I used to teach, the worst students were students that learned something wrong.

00:04:23.000 You would think like, oh, I already have five years of karate and this and that, and I'm like, oh great, this should be good.

00:04:29.000 It was never good.

00:04:30.000 It was the opposite.

00:04:30.000 You're better off taking a young kid With no experience at all, they can get way better way faster because they don't have any bad habits.

00:04:37.000 Because as soon as you get nervous or as soon as you get tired, you go right back to your bad habits.

00:04:42.000 You go back to your...

00:04:42.000 So you have to relearn everything.

00:04:45.000 It was...

00:04:47.000 Seeing the kids, I went to some of the fights out there, and it's wild seeing the kids in the undercard where you're seeing seven-year-olds fighting.

00:04:58.000 This is wrong, but I got to see the main event, too, so I can't leave.

00:05:02.000 It's their culture.

00:05:04.000 It feels wrong, but it's their culture, and it's also how a lot of the families make money.

00:05:09.000 I mean, they literally send their kid off to the camp.

00:05:12.000 But I was trying to figure out...

00:05:15.000 So it's part of the culture.

00:05:18.000 It's national sport.

00:05:20.000 But it doesn't seem...

00:05:23.000 You know, you have people, it's some fighters that are legends there.

00:05:28.000 There's the equivalent to Mike Tyson or something.

00:05:32.000 And you could probably get a private with them for 400 bucks.

00:05:35.000 So what's going on with the model over there where it's been a national sport for a while, but it seems like...

00:05:44.000 The money isn't there?

00:05:46.000 Is it corruption?

00:05:48.000 Well, first of all, it's very inexpensive to go to the fights.

00:05:51.000 You know that.

00:05:52.000 Everything's inexpensive in Thailand.

00:05:54.000 Everybody's wearing flip-flops, right?

00:05:56.000 It's an interesting place.

00:05:58.000 My friend John Wayne Parr went there when he was a boy.

00:06:02.000 He was a young teenager and lived there.

00:06:04.000 Lived as a monk.

00:06:05.000 He's an Australian, multiple-time world Muay Thai champion.

00:06:09.000 And he spent a good deal of his time growing up there.

00:06:14.000 And really embrace the culture.

00:06:16.000 First of all, it's the land of smiles.

00:06:19.000 Everyone's friendly.

00:06:20.000 One of the things I noticed there, people are genuinely very friendly.

00:06:24.000 There's very little materialism there.

00:06:26.000 People are generally happy with wearing a pair of shorts.

00:06:30.000 It's never cold out, so you could wear shorts and flip-flops, and that's how everybody's walking around.

00:06:35.000 And I don't think there's a lot of money in the business.

00:06:39.000 You know, I think there's enough...

00:06:40.000 The King takes it.

00:06:41.000 The King takes it.

00:06:42.000 The King takes a lot.

00:06:43.000 Remember, we took a picture in front of The King.

00:06:45.000 We did.

00:06:45.000 We had a picture in front.

00:06:46.000 I was like, I don't know if we should post this.

00:06:48.000 Like, you and me smiling in front of a picture of The King.

00:06:52.000 Like, you might get in trouble for that.

00:06:54.000 There's weird rules over there for The King.

00:06:56.000 The King, I actually had a bit about him.

00:07:00.000 I cut it, not because I was scared, but just because it didn't fit.

00:07:05.000 It's about how he, you know, you have to stand up during the national anthem.

00:07:11.000 And they play it at certain times during the day.

00:07:13.000 And they play it before the movies.

00:07:15.000 So I went to the movies out there to see Ant-Man 2. And after the previews, the King of Thailand's hype video comes on.

00:07:25.000 And everybody has to stand up.

00:07:27.000 In the movie theater.

00:07:28.000 In the movie theater.

00:07:30.000 But it was the worst produced film.

00:07:33.000 It was a terrible video.

00:07:36.000 I've seen Instagram fitness models with better videos than the king of style.

00:07:41.000 It's like, you're the king.

00:07:42.000 Get some king-like production value.

00:07:45.000 You ain't got no top-notch editors.

00:07:47.000 I don't think Thailand's known for it.

00:07:48.000 It's like films.

00:07:49.000 He needs to get on Fiverr or something.

00:07:52.000 I don't work for Fiverr, by the way.

00:07:55.000 Maybe, what's that new one that lost all the money?

00:07:57.000 Quibi? 0.76

00:07:58.000 What is it called?

00:07:59.000 What is it called?

00:08:00.000 Is that it?

00:08:01.000 Quibi? 0.76

00:08:01.000 Yeah. 0.76

00:08:02.000 Maybe get on that?

00:08:03.000 I don't know.

00:08:04.000 You're the king!

00:08:06.000 And you're putting your stuff in a Marvel movie? 1.00

00:08:09.000 Do you see that shit with his mistress? 1.00

00:08:12.000 He had an official mistress, but she fucked up, and she got demoted, and so she had to bow down in front of him, in front of everybody. 1.00

00:08:21.000 She was talking shit. 1.00

00:08:22.000 The mistress probably wanted to be the queen. 1.00

00:08:24.000 Look at her there. 0.98

00:08:25.000 She's begging for forgiveness.

00:08:27.000 The king makes mistress lie at his feet.

00:08:30.000 And make her his, what does it say? 0.76

00:08:32.000 As he makes her his...

00:08:34.000 What does it say there?

00:08:35.000 That was when she was the official concubine, attended by his wife in all capitals.

00:08:43.000 But then he demoted her.

00:08:45.000 This is when she became the official concubine.

00:08:48.000 And by the way, I think that was the first time anybody had an official concubine in like 100 years.

00:08:55.000 This is the flashiest version of, I don't love that hoe! 1.00

00:08:59.000 I don't love that hoe! 1.00

00:09:01.000 I love you!

00:09:01.000 Look!

00:09:02.000 I'll shame that bitch in front of everybody! 1.00

00:09:05.000 Look! 1.00

00:09:05.000 She had to lie down at his feet. 1.00

00:09:07.000 Look! 1.00

00:09:08.000 Fuck you! 1.00

00:09:10.000 It's weird. 1.00

00:09:11.000 It's like the king's the only baller.

00:09:12.000 You see us?

00:09:13.000 You see?

00:09:14.000 That's bonkers.

00:09:15.000 He's the only baller. 0.74

00:09:17.000 The only baller.

00:09:17.000 Everyone else is just kind of normal there.

00:09:22.000 He's marrying his wife here.

00:09:24.000 She's the same thing. 1.00

00:09:24.000 Oh, the wife had to do the same shit? 1.00

00:09:26.000 Wow. 1.00

00:09:27.000 And she's pouring tea on her head? 1.00

00:09:28.000 What is that?

00:09:29.000 And other people laying down?

00:09:31.000 Are they cleaning?

00:09:33.000 Very odd.

00:09:35.000 Good for him.

00:09:37.000 They seem to love him over there.

00:09:39.000 She used to be the... 1.00

00:09:42.000 She was a former... 0.97

00:09:43.000 She was a soldier?

00:09:44.000 Bodyguard.

00:09:45.000 Former bodyguard.

00:09:47.000 Okay.

00:09:48.000 You take that weird hat off and come live with me.

00:09:53.000 That's a microphone cover.

00:09:55.000 Take that.

00:09:56.000 That's this.

00:09:57.000 That's this thing.

00:09:59.000 Take that hat off.

00:10:00.000 Stop chatting that stuff.

00:10:02.000 Let's go have some tea.

00:10:07.000 I did enjoy Thailand, though.

00:10:09.000 I enjoyed it a lot.

00:10:10.000 It's a good time.

00:10:11.000 Yeah.

00:10:13.000 I went back last year.

00:10:16.000 Did you do the same thing?

00:10:17.000 Who's that guy?

00:10:18.000 Just for a little bit.

00:10:19.000 Not the...

00:10:19.000 What's going on there?

00:10:21.000 The crop top.

00:10:22.000 What is this?

00:10:23.000 The monarch even threatened to sue Facebook over the startling shots taken in 2016 by a passerby who recognized the king.

00:10:31.000 Oh, that's the king?

00:10:33.000 Yoga class.

00:10:34.000 Wait a minute.

00:10:35.000 Soul cycle.

00:10:37.000 Well, she has to wear the crazy hat and he's got to wear a sports bra?

00:10:40.000 He was in Munich.

00:10:41.000 Oh! 0.60

00:10:42.000 He's kicking it.

00:10:43.000 Okay.

00:10:44.000 Yeah, the laws over there are so...

00:10:47.000 People...

00:10:48.000 I saw something about...

00:10:49.000 Someone got put in jail for liking a post, making fun of the king's dog.

00:10:55.000 Yeah, I saw that too.

00:10:57.000 Just...

00:10:58.000 The next picture I saw...

00:10:59.000 Is he's in the...

00:11:02.000 So that's just how he likes to rock it.

00:11:04.000 He likes tank tops that show his belly button.

00:11:07.000 That's cool.

00:11:08.000 It's cultural.

00:11:09.000 The king.

00:11:11.000 I'm the king.

00:11:12.000 Yeah, he's the king.

00:11:13.000 If I was the king of Thailand, I'd dress like that too. 1.00

00:11:16.000 What the fuck you gonna do, bitch? 1.00

00:11:19.000 Yeah, you can get in a lot of trouble for making fun of him over there. 1.00

00:11:22.000 Yeah.

00:11:23.000 Well, guess we're not going back.

00:11:24.000 Well, we probably shouldn't for a couple years.

00:11:27.000 Cambodia it is.

00:11:30.000 Myanmar.

00:11:31.000 I want to go see, have you ever seen Latwe?

00:11:34.000 Do you know what that is?

00:11:35.000 No.

00:11:35.000 That's like, if you think Thai boxing is extreme, they take it another level.

00:11:39.000 Latwe, they use headbutts, and they kick you when you're down. 1.00

00:11:43.000 They do all kinds of crazy shit. 1.00

00:11:45.000 Yeah, nah. 1.00

00:11:48.000 Kicked wild down.

00:11:49.000 It's just, it looks, it's too intense.

00:11:52.000 It's intense.

00:11:52.000 We had David LaDuke, who's the king of Latwe.

00:11:56.000 He came on the podcast.

00:11:57.000 He's a wild man.

00:11:59.000 He's a wild man.

00:12:00.000 Yeah, I think about...

00:12:02.000 Oh, they're bare knuckle too.

00:12:05.000 Yeah.

00:12:07.000 I just want some cardio.

00:12:09.000 This is Let's Way.

00:12:09.000 Look at this.

00:12:11.000 This is how they fight.

00:12:12.000 Bare knuckles.

00:12:13.000 It's basically like Muay Thai, but way more hardcore.

00:12:18.000 See that?

00:12:19.000 You can knee a dude when he's on his way down.

00:12:22.000 It's way more hardcore.

00:12:25.000 It's like one more level of hardcore.

00:12:27.000 And headbutts.

00:12:28.000 A lot of headbutts.

00:12:31.000 Yeah.

00:12:32.000 But they basically use all the techniques of Muay Thai, but they just take it to a totally different level.

00:12:37.000 The second time I went, when I went to Koh Samoy last year, and this girl I was seeing, we go to a couple classes, and I didn't know she had done Muay Thai before,

00:12:55.000 so we had a private class.

00:12:58.000 And she was lighting the bag up with the kicks. 0.98

00:13:02.000 Oh, no.

00:13:04.000 Bow, bow, bow.

00:13:05.000 And I was like, oh.

00:13:06.000 And then I get up there with my bow-legged kicks.

00:13:09.000 Oh, no.

00:13:13.000 Then the trainer's like, come on, you can do better.

00:13:15.000 Look at her.

00:13:16.000 Oh no.

00:13:17.000 She'd light it.

00:13:18.000 Bow! 0.99

00:13:19.000 Bow! 0.99

00:13:19.000 I'm like, let's not do kicks. 0.99

00:13:21.000 Knees! 0.51

00:13:22.000 Elbow, elbow! 1.00

00:13:23.000 Had she fought before?

00:13:25.000 I don't think she fought, but she had trained a good amount.

00:13:28.000 It was, yeah.

00:13:29.000 She lit it up.

00:13:30.000 But she was one of those people that, I mean, you can't tell people, but I'd known her a little bit, but didn't know that.

00:13:37.000 She kept it under wraps.

00:13:39.000 Yeah.

00:13:39.000 Was it uncomfortable after that?

00:13:42.000 No, it wasn't uncomfortable.

00:13:43.000 It wasn't uncomfortable, but it was just like, whoa, unexpected.

00:13:46.000 I didn't know.

00:13:48.000 Yeah, there's something about women that can fight. 1.00

00:13:51.000 Like, ooh, that's an extra element of danger. 1.00

00:13:55.000 A woman who can fuck you up. 1.00

00:13:58.000 Like a hot chick who can fuck you up. 1.00

00:14:02.000 That's nerve-wracking. 1.00

00:14:04.000 Yeah, man.

00:14:05.000 Like, if you're a woman, like a Holly Holm, or like a, you know, world champion kickboxer woman, like, how, what kind of man do you date?

00:14:15.000 Like, you gotta date another savage.

00:14:17.000 Yeah, date a fighter.

00:14:18.000 You have to.

00:14:19.000 They can't, they can't respect regular people. 1.00

00:14:22.000 They'll fuck you up. 1.00

00:14:24.000 Unless they separate... 1.00

00:14:25.000 Nah, they probably just have to...

00:14:26.000 Unless they dominate you. 1.00

00:14:27.000 They like to hold you down, make you eat their pussy, and just grab you by the back of the head. 1.00

00:14:32.000 Sit! 1.00

00:14:33.000 Come on, motherfucker. 1.00

00:14:35.000 Shut up! 1.00

00:14:35.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:14:36.000 I just jogged for 10 miles. 1.00

00:14:38.000 That kind of shit. 1.00

00:14:40.000 Drip, drip, drip. 1.00

00:14:41.000 There's probably a lot of guys who are into that, though.

00:14:43.000 You know? 0.99

00:14:44.000 Dudes are into getting kicked in the balls. 1.00

00:14:46.000 They're into all kinds of weird shit. 1.00

00:14:48.000 You can find somebody out there that's into everything. 1.00

00:14:51.000 They're getting kicked...

00:14:54.000 That one, that seems extreme, because it's like, what? 0.99

00:14:58.000 Have you seen the videos of guys that are into getting kicked in the balls by women? 0.99

00:15:02.000 No. 0.99

00:15:03.000 Oh my god.

00:15:03.000 I don't want to show it to you.

00:15:05.000 No?

00:15:06.000 I want to look it up. 1.00

00:15:08.000 They're into getting kicked in the balls and getting their balls stomped on by stilettos. 1.00

00:15:12.000 That's like a whole category of pain and torture. 1.00

00:15:16.000 All those BDSM folks, you know?

00:15:19.000 Yeah.

00:15:19.000 Yeah, the stomping out seems...

00:15:25.000 I don't know what would really lead you to that zone of extremes. 1.00

00:15:31.000 Look, I love Jim Norton to death, but he likes chicks pissing on him and all kinds of crazy shit. 1.00

00:15:36.000 People are into weird stuff, man. 0.99

00:15:38.000 People living out there, man.

00:15:40.000 People out there living, you know. 1.00

00:15:42.000 Speaking of living, I've been hearing some crazy shit about you. 0.96

00:15:47.000 And I've been hearing that you are making a move, like a very, very unusual move To a very strange place that's very unusual for a man from Chicago to just... 0.98

00:15:59.000 Up and take off.

00:16:00.000 Yeah.

00:16:01.000 I do want to get into that.

00:16:02.000 That just reminded me that I bought some of those flamethrowers when they were selling them.

00:16:08.000 Oh, the Elon Musk one?

00:16:09.000 I bought them with the intent of reselling them, and they're in my parents' basement.

00:16:14.000 How many you got?

00:16:15.000 I think I bought four.

00:16:17.000 That's a good investment.

00:16:18.000 They're probably worth a lot of money.

00:16:19.000 Yeah?

00:16:20.000 Yeah.

00:16:20.000 I gotta go check on them.

00:16:23.000 Okay.

00:16:25.000 So, with this whole...

00:16:27.000 You doing something crazy?

00:16:29.000 I might.

00:16:30.000 So, COVID and just kind of being cooped up, it really made me think about how, you know, the places that I've lived and what was keeping me from living elsewhere and moving internationally is because,

00:16:48.000 oh, you need to be here for work.

00:16:51.000 You have to be, you know, within a couple hours of these places to either tour or film.

00:16:58.000 But now, touring is super weird.

00:17:02.000 Are you doing any touring at all?

00:17:05.000 No.

00:17:06.000 When was the last time you did stand-up?

00:17:09.000 Beginning of March.

00:17:12.000 Me too.

00:17:13.000 Beginning of March in Denver.

00:17:15.000 Two weeks ago I did Houston.

00:17:16.000 How was that?

00:17:17.000 Weird.

00:17:18.000 First show was weird.

00:17:19.000 Second show was normal.

00:17:21.000 Second show was a show.

00:17:22.000 First show was like, I can't believe I'm going to do stand-up again.

00:17:25.000 Do you know Moses?

00:17:26.000 Brian Moses?

00:17:27.000 Yeah.

00:17:27.000 Roast Battle?

00:17:28.000 Me, Moses, and Tony Hinchcliffe.

00:17:30.000 We went to the Houston Improv.

00:17:31.000 It was awesome.

00:17:32.000 We had a good time.

00:17:33.000 It was really fun, man.

00:17:35.000 It was like the old days, but I got weirded out. 0.99

00:17:37.000 And I was like, man, I don't want to catch this shit. 0.99

00:17:39.000 Like, is this worth it? 1.00

00:17:40.000 Like, what am I doing?

00:17:41.000 And then Houston, while we were there, they got this thing that they're moving back to stage one.

00:17:46.000 So they're going back.

00:17:47.000 So they're shutting all the bars down.

00:17:49.000 Restaurants were down to 50% capacity.

00:17:52.000 And I was like, look, you know, we're not in the crowd.

00:17:56.000 You've been to Houston Improv?

00:17:59.000 Has it moved in years?

00:18:01.000 It's my first time ever.

00:18:03.000 Okay.

00:18:04.000 It's nice.

00:18:05.000 It's a nice place.

00:18:06.000 And it's got a high stage.

00:18:07.000 So you're above everybody.

00:18:09.000 It's not like they're spitting in your face.

00:18:11.000 You're above them.

00:18:12.000 Everyone was wearing masks.

00:18:13.000 So I was like, this is probably safe, but...

00:18:17.000 Afterwards, you know, it's just odd.

00:18:19.000 It was just odd.

00:18:20.000 And I was like, I don't want to get sick, and most importantly, I don't want to get anyone sick.

00:18:25.000 Right.

00:18:25.000 So I was like, you know, my wife's mom lives down the street from us, and I don't...

00:18:30.000 You know what I mean?

00:18:30.000 It's like, what if I got a guest sick?

00:18:33.000 I had a small jam session on my roof on Sunday, where initially it was supposed to be the band, handful of people, and then...

00:18:47.000 It didn't get crazy like everybody was packed.

00:18:49.000 Everybody still kept that space.

00:18:51.000 It was a reasonable setup, but with these times, it made it intense.

00:18:55.000 And I had some mushroom drink that my friend Babylon had made.

00:19:00.000 And so I had a good time.

00:19:03.000 I got on the mic a little bit, and it was cool.

00:19:06.000 And, you know, people were vibing.

00:19:07.000 Everybody was excited to be there, bands playing, different people.

00:19:10.000 And then at one point, I started looking around.

00:19:14.000 Yo, did I... Am I creating some type of super spreader situation? 0.99

00:19:21.000 Outdoors is maybe 15, 18 people, but I just started being like, oh, fuck. 0.99

00:19:27.000 I'm about to be in the goddamn news for this party. 1.00

00:19:30.000 Is somebody going to die from being it? 0.99

00:19:32.000 And it was just...

00:19:33.000 I had the worst trip ever.

00:19:38.000 Ever because of it.

00:19:40.000 Because I had never, I hadn't had any, you know, it was a new spot for me.

00:19:43.000 So I hadn't had, it was just a, it was a lot of sensory overload and just thoughts spiraling.

00:19:49.000 And my friend, one of my friends, she said, you all right?

00:19:53.000 And I was just like, I was really, I was gone, dog.

00:19:58.000 I had to take a walk around the block and it just, it was, it was terrible.

00:20:04.000 Terrible. 0.98

00:20:05.000 Did I just create some type of situation where somebody could die from a fucking jam session just because I kind of got antsy about wanting to do something. 0.98

00:20:19.000 It was rough. 0.99

00:20:23.000 That was Sunday.

00:20:25.000 I had some A couple appearances or calls to do Monday, canceled those.

00:20:32.000 It was like, no on camera today.

00:20:35.000 I'm still pulling it back together.

00:20:37.000 It was bonkers, man.

00:20:39.000 Yeah, I got back.

00:20:40.000 I immediately got tested.

00:20:41.000 And when I was clean, I was like, that's it.

00:20:44.000 I'm canceling everything for a while.

00:20:46.000 Until they come up with some sort of a treatment or until herd immunity is kicked in to the point where, you know, the virus has dropped down to a very low level of viral load and people aren't getting real sick.

00:20:59.000 It's just, if everybody was healthy, I would have no worry.

00:21:04.000 Right.

00:21:04.000 But I don't want unhealthy people to die, or old people to die.

00:21:07.000 It's so complicated, man.

00:21:09.000 You know, I have a few friends, I have like nine friends that have got it.

00:21:13.000 Yeah.

00:21:13.000 And everyone's fine, but what if they weren't?

00:21:16.000 You know?

00:21:17.000 I mean, there's a lot of people that aren't.

00:21:19.000 It's scary.

00:21:20.000 It's weird.

00:21:21.000 And we were just, Jamie and I were just reading this story about, was it from the UK? Yeah.

00:21:28.000 I think it was the mirror.

00:21:31.000 All these people that they're finding that have very minimal symptoms, but then they have this brain disease. 1.00

00:21:38.000 Damn! 0.99

00:21:39.000 Yeah, like some inflammation of the brain and some of them had to be on anti-psychosis medicine. 1.00

00:21:46.000 One lady, what did she saw? 1.00

00:21:48.000 Lions in her fucking house? 0.99

00:21:50.000 Yeah, a new study that warned that potentially deadly brain disorders may be a symptom of COVID-19, even in people with otherwise mild disease. 0.99

00:21:59.000 The research published today by the journal Brain looked at 40 adult patients with COVID-19 in the UK, finding that they showed symptoms of a wide range of serious brain diseases.

00:22:09.000 Many of the patients had only mild, typical COVID-19 symptoms, such as fever or respiratory issues, and for some, their neurological symptoms were the only sign that they were sick.

00:22:19.000 One 55-year-old woman with no known current or historical mental illness was admitted to a hospital with recognized COVID-19 symptoms including fever, cough, and muscle aches.

00:22:30.000 She was discharged after two weeks, having been treated with oxygen, but four days later her husband reported she was confused and behaving strangely.

00:22:37.000 She then experienced hallucinations, reporting that lions and monkeys!

00:22:41.000 She was seeing lions and monkeys in her house and became delusional and aggressive with her family and hospital staff.

00:22:47.000 She was treated with antipsychotic medication, and her symptoms improved over the course of three weeks, although the study does not confirm whether she made a full recovery.

00:22:57.000 What?

00:22:58.000 Yeah, that's pretty bonkers right there. 1.00

00:23:00.000 This fucking disease is bonkers. 1.00

00:23:02.000 Because for some people, it ain't shit. 1.00

00:23:04.000 Right. 0.99

00:23:05.000 I know some people that were asymptomatic.

00:23:07.000 They went through the whole thing with nothing.

00:23:09.000 They tested positive.

00:23:12.000 They didn't feel it.

00:23:13.000 They chilled.

00:23:15.000 They just quarantined for two weeks.

00:23:17.000 They got retested.

00:23:18.000 They don't have it anymore.

00:23:19.000 They never felt anything.

00:23:20.000 And then I know other people that months later, they can't go up flights of stairs.

00:23:25.000 They're exhausted all the time.

00:23:27.000 They got no motivation.

00:23:29.000 Just everything feels...

00:23:30.000 Just the world's like they got a weight vest on everywhere they go.

00:23:34.000 Oh, man.

00:23:35.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:23:36.000 Fuck this disease. 1.00

00:23:37.000 It's flipped everything upside down, man. 1.00

00:23:43.000 That's why...

00:23:44.000 So, I've been thinking about...

00:23:46.000 Where you going?

00:23:49.000 Thinking about going to Ghana for a couple months.

00:23:54.000 Oh, man.

00:23:56.000 You're not going to put it on?

00:23:57.000 I'm setting you up.

00:23:59.000 Show me the outfit.

00:24:00.000 Come on, man.

00:24:01.000 You know, this...

00:24:02.000 I actually...

00:24:02.000 I got this in...

00:24:04.000 I got this in, you know, I don't get to go nowhere, so you put on something fly every now and then.

00:24:12.000 And don't show this part.

00:24:13.000 Don't show that part.

00:24:15.000 Make sure you don't catch that in the camera.

00:24:19.000 But this is from Singapore.

00:24:24.000 A random jacket I got over the holiday.

00:24:26.000 I've been thinking about going to Ghana just because I took African ancestry tests.

00:24:34.000 Apparently I'm Ghanaian on my father's side.

00:24:37.000 And I think America is going to be...

00:24:44.000 It's very annoying now, and it's going to be pretty annoying in November.

00:24:49.000 So if I can get out of here October, at least for two, three months, just as an exploratory trip, and get a different perspective to live from, write from, work from, and just a whole different zone for a bit,

00:25:06.000 and really dive in out there, I think now is the time to just shift. 0.99

00:25:12.000 Fuck yeah. 1.00

00:25:12.000 I love the idea. 1.00

00:25:15.000 I love it.

00:25:16.000 Especially now, right?

00:25:17.000 You just released a special.

00:25:18.000 It's available free on YouTube right now.

00:25:20.000 Yeah.

00:25:21.000 So, like, what better way to come up with new material than live in Ghana for a few months right before the world explodes? 1.00

00:25:27.000 Because it's going to fucking explode no matter who wins, man. 0.93

00:25:30.000 I'm nervous to be here no matter who wins. 0.98

00:25:33.000 Because it's not a...

00:25:35.000 Biden is not a...

00:25:39.000 It's going to be weird because it's not something to really cheer for.

00:25:42.000 Even if the plan is for him to pass it off and step down, that's still weird.

00:25:48.000 If that's not smooth to step, hey, I'm old, I won, I'm stepping down, that's going to create a whole zone.

00:25:58.000 The only way that would ever work is if whoever his running weight was was preferable to him and everybody was excited about it.

00:26:06.000 Like someone who you would have voted for anyway.

00:26:08.000 And we don't even know who the running mate is right now, as of today, July 8th.

00:26:11.000 We don't know who that is.

00:26:12.000 But if the running mate is preferable to him and we're like, good, he's gonna be a woman, good, give it to her. 0.99

00:26:17.000 Let her run it. 0.99

00:26:18.000 If it's like that, maybe we'll be okay.

00:26:20.000 But he's not even around.

00:26:22.000 He's hiding somewhere.

00:26:24.000 He's in a basement.

00:26:25.000 I just am skeptical of him just because he was vice president as an old guy for eight years.

00:26:34.000 That means he was just jealous.

00:26:40.000 Just jealous.

00:26:42.000 One day.

00:26:44.000 One day.

00:26:45.000 That's too weird of a wait to make that move at this age.

00:26:52.000 It should be a cap.

00:26:54.000 60 for president.

00:26:58.000 And I'm only saying 60 to be nice.

00:27:02.000 50, 55. Well, when Reagan was president, he was the oldest president before Trump.

00:27:10.000 And then dementia.

00:27:11.000 Yeah, he wound up getting Alzheimer's, right?

00:27:14.000 Was it Alzheimer's?

00:27:17.000 I think dementia.

00:27:19.000 I'll just never forget when I was an open-miker.

00:27:22.000 It was like 1988. There was a guy named Jimmy Tingle, who was a Boston comedy legend.

00:27:26.000 He had this joke about Reagan on trial, because Reagan was on trial.

00:27:29.000 And they asked him if he ever sold arms to Iran.

00:27:32.000 And he said he couldn't remember.

00:27:33.000 And Jimmy Tingle was like, Mr. President!

00:27:37.000 If you ever sell arms to people who hate us, jot it down.

00:27:44.000 Make a note.

00:27:45.000 Put it on your refrigerator.

00:27:47.000 Yeah, you should have some type of reminder. 0.94

00:27:51.000 Yeah, he went out, and we thought he was bullshitting.

00:27:54.000 We were like, she's just pretending he doesn't remember.

00:27:57.000 But then in the end, he didn't remember anything.

00:27:59.000 Who knows if he remembered that.

00:28:02.000 Yeah, it's...

00:28:03.000 The age thing is...

00:28:06.000 There needs to be a sort of cap because why you shouldn't be...

00:28:14.000 First of all, you're...

00:28:17.000 Any ambitions you have in your 70s should be private things like carpentry or music production.

00:28:28.000 It should be private.

00:28:30.000 You shouldn't have anything at 70 that has to do with the larger populace.

00:28:36.000 No.

00:28:37.000 You go knit, you go read and pursue something you wish you did when you were 32 that's not involving millions of people.

00:28:46.000 I say that, but then I was willing to vote for Bernie Sanders.

00:28:50.000 I was a Bernie Sanders supporter before he lost in the primaries.

00:28:54.000 I felt like his policies were interesting.

00:28:58.000 It would be an interesting way to shake up the country.

00:29:00.000 Let's put focus on human beings and people and communities instead of just money and Foreign interventionist wars. 0.98

00:29:08.000 I think Bernie has some interesting policies and he should just, you know, put them shits on a PDF. Is he the only one? 0.97

00:29:20.000 They can't be that good if he's the only one that can do them.

00:29:23.000 No, he's not the only one.

00:29:26.000 Pass him off and be the advisor on the side, you know?

00:29:31.000 Yeah.

00:29:32.000 Just give advice, you know, guidance, be the wise sage.

00:29:40.000 The wise sage.

00:29:42.000 But at that age, you know, the travel is tough on a young, healthy person.

00:29:50.000 It's tough on us.

00:29:51.000 Exactly.

00:29:51.000 Yeah, when I got back from Houston, I had not done stand-up in a long time, and I was exhausted on Sunday.

00:29:56.000 I was like, fuck, man, I forgot how tiring this shit is. 0.99

00:29:58.000 Yeah, multiple, man, yeah. 1.00

00:30:00.000 Flights, getting up in the morning, all that shit. 0.94

00:30:03.000 I am very curious now that this Jelaine Maxwell guy or lady got arrested, you know, the Jeffrey Epstein's confidant. 1.00

00:30:13.000 First of all, how quick before they kill her?

00:30:17.000 Second of all, if they don't kill her, what is she gonna say and who's going down? 0.93

00:30:21.000 Because there's a lot of people going down. 0.98

00:30:24.000 It's pretty bonkers.

00:30:26.000 That could affect the election. 0.94

00:30:28.000 You think it would affect the election?

00:30:30.000 100%.

00:30:31.000 Yeah, 100%.

00:30:33.000 Well, first of all, Trump used to hang out with that guy.

00:30:36.000 This picture with Melania and Trump and Jeffrey Epstein and Ghislaine and Fox News cut out Trump.

00:30:44.000 They edited the picture so that Trump wasn't in the picture.

00:30:48.000 And they're like, well, he made a mistake. 0.99

00:30:50.000 Like, bitch, he didn't make a mistake. 1.00

00:30:52.000 There's the picture. 1.00

00:30:53.000 They were posing, partying together.

00:30:57.000 They hung out.

00:30:59.000 I know at the end of the doc on Netflix, they said that he had all of those tapes and all of those rooms were being taped.

00:31:10.000 So I wonder if she has access to that or did they burn that?

00:31:15.000 That's a good question.

00:31:17.000 What's up?

00:31:18.000 Yeah.

00:31:18.000 You know he had a picture of Bill Clinton in a dress in the foyer of his house?

00:31:23.000 Damn. 0.99

00:31:24.000 It's a crazy picture. 1.00

00:31:25.000 Like, you are my bitch. 1.00

00:31:27.000 Because Clinton flew with him like 26 times. 1.00

00:31:32.000 Look at that.

00:31:32.000 That's a picture.

00:31:33.000 That's a real picture that was in the foyer of his house.

00:31:39.000 How crazy is that?

00:31:40.000 That's a real picture, man.

00:31:42.000 My friend, Eric Weinstein, has seen that picture in real life.

00:31:45.000 That's a real picture.

00:31:47.000 Well, that's a painting.

00:31:47.000 A painting, yeah.

00:31:48.000 Not a photo.

00:31:49.000 A painting.

00:31:50.000 I'm sorry.

00:31:51.000 Oh, so he made it to taunt him? 1.00

00:31:55.000 He made it to let him know, bitch, I own you. 1.00

00:32:01.000 I mean, that's what I'm at. 0.98

00:32:02.000 Look, we were friends, and then you came over to my house, and I got a painting.

00:32:06.000 Hey, Hannibal, I want to show you something.

00:32:08.000 It's you in a dress. 0.95

00:32:09.000 If you and I have been partying together and I flew you to some island and we fucked kids together, and then you came over to my house and there's a painting of you in a dress, you'd be like, what have I done? 0.98

00:32:19.000 Yeah, it just set us all on fire. 0.97

00:32:23.000 Just come in with a vest strapped up with dynamite.

00:32:27.000 Boom! 0.99

00:32:28.000 You know what?

00:32:29.000 I don't deserve to live anymore anyway for my actions.

00:32:32.000 It's so crazy because it's one of those things where you would hear about that from like the craziest conspiracy theorists.

00:32:39.000 Like, bro, there's an island.

00:32:41.000 They take all these elites and they have these underage girls on this island. 1.00

00:32:45.000 You'd be like... 1.00

00:32:46.000 Get the fuck out of here with this crazy talk. 1.00

00:32:48.000 That's crazy talk. 0.99

00:32:49.000 And then you find out, wait, it's true?

00:32:51.000 And they had scientists there and lawyers there and politicians there.

00:32:59.000 What?

00:33:00.000 There really was an island?

00:33:02.000 Like, they had the prince?

00:33:05.000 What's his name?

00:33:06.000 Prince Andrew?

00:33:06.000 Prince Andrew was there?

00:33:08.000 His part was funny because they said, no, it's this picture of you.

00:33:13.000 Yeah, that is a picture of me, but...

00:33:16.000 I don't remember.

00:33:17.000 Yeah, he was like, I don't hug.

00:33:18.000 I'm a royal.

00:33:19.000 Royals don't hug. 0.99

00:33:21.000 He just kept it.

00:33:22.000 Yeah, that's me, but I don't know what you...

00:33:26.000 Just blank face, lie like that, and just keep it neutral.

00:33:33.000 It is what it is.

00:33:35.000 Did you see that interview that he did?

00:33:37.000 The full interview?

00:33:38.000 I just saw it in the doc.

00:33:40.000 Well, there's an interview with him.

00:33:42.000 I forget who the woman was that was interviewing him. 0.98

00:33:44.000 But when you're watching the interview, you're like, holy shit, why did you do this? 0.98

00:33:49.000 Like, you know that you're guilty, and you agreed to do this interview? 0.99

00:33:53.000 Like, this isn't even the cops. 1.00

00:33:54.000 This is like a reporter, and you're talking to this reporter, and you're clearly full of shit and really nervous. 0.99

00:34:01.000 This is crazy. 0.99

00:34:02.000 The whole thing's crazy.

00:34:03.000 Yeah, it's old money white guy confidence, man.

00:34:07.000 But it's royal confidence, right?

00:34:10.000 They also have crazy libel laws in the UK. They can get away with a lot over there, because they could sue you for all kinds of shit, and the royal family, I'm sure, is extremely litigious. 0.98

00:34:22.000 This is the whole story. 0.99

00:34:23.000 Here it is.

00:34:24.000 Jelaine Maxwell has allegedly secret video footage of Prince Andrew.

00:34:29.000 Oh, Jesus.

00:34:31.000 Pornhub, here we come.

00:34:35.000 It just seems like we're in a movie, man.

00:34:37.000 It's like the movie just keeps getting crazier and crazier.

00:34:40.000 Yeah.

00:34:40.000 You know what I've been doing just to turn my brain off?

00:34:45.000 Putting on that show The Floor is Lava on Netflix and just sound off, put music on.

00:34:51.000 Sometimes I put the Super Mario theme and it lines up and I'll play the death music when they fall into something.

00:34:59.000 It's just good to...

00:35:01.000 Zone out for a half hour, hour, and just look at something that is not intense at all.

00:35:08.000 Nonsense.

00:35:09.000 Low stakes, chill entertainment.

00:35:13.000 Just escape a little bit.

00:35:16.000 Watch people try not to fall in the lava.

00:35:19.000 Yeah, my friend Rutledge, he's the host of that.

00:35:22.000 He's a car guy.

00:35:23.000 Shout out to Rutledge.

00:35:25.000 Yeah, my kids love that show.

00:35:27.000 Yeah.

00:35:28.000 Sound off.

00:35:29.000 It's a good sound off show.

00:35:30.000 It's just red water.

00:35:31.000 It's just red.

00:35:32.000 You get it.

00:35:33.000 You don't need to hear anything they say.

00:35:34.000 I don't care about your backstory.

00:35:37.000 Oh, you're all doctors.

00:35:38.000 Okay, I get it.

00:35:40.000 I don't know what nobody sounds like.

00:35:43.000 Play some tunes.

00:35:45.000 And watch Floyd's live.

00:35:47.000 Just let it be.

00:35:48.000 Yeah, meditation is great.

00:35:50.000 Yeah, those are the kind of things that are very popular at times like this.

00:35:55.000 We want cartoons, almost. 0.95

00:35:57.000 We want things that are silly. 0.64

00:35:58.000 No stakes.

00:36:00.000 Because you can...

00:36:01.000 It's so much news, and every area has so much news right now, so if you want it, you can get it right now.

00:36:11.000 Because every state has its own individual corona situation, so you can kind of get lost in the...

00:36:17.000 I'm getting lost in the...

00:36:21.000 California and Illinois, because that's where I am, where my family is, but then it's everywhere else.

00:36:26.000 And then you kind of forget, oh yeah, Atlanta's been open for a while.

00:36:29.000 They're shooting stuff in Atlanta.

00:36:31.000 They've been shooting and filming for a month.

00:36:33.000 Oh, what's going on here?

00:36:34.000 What's going on there?

00:36:35.000 So it's just, if you...

00:36:37.000 I was able to do it earlier and kind of, oh, shut off and get off of socials at one point.

00:36:46.000 And then things got more intense, the George Floyd thing.

00:36:50.000 And then I got back in the news again, like really looking at stuff.

00:36:54.000 And yeah, I need a cleanse.

00:36:59.000 I don't think people are supposed to take in the news of the whole world.

00:37:04.000 I think it's very bad for you.

00:37:06.000 I think because most of the news you're going to get is the news of things that are dangerous.

00:37:11.000 So you're getting things that are dangerous all over the world.

00:37:14.000 So it gives you a distorted perception of the current danger around you.

00:37:18.000 You think it's everywhere.

00:37:20.000 And most of it isn't actionable where it's news you can take.

00:37:25.000 Okay, well, I'm going to do this.

00:37:27.000 Right.

00:37:27.000 Nope.

00:37:28.000 It's just you just take it.

00:37:29.000 That's happening.

00:37:29.000 Just get scared.

00:37:31.000 So, yeah, man.

00:37:35.000 You got to figure out how to keep it mellow, man.

00:37:39.000 I watched Marble Races.

00:37:43.000 The Marblelympics? 0.90

00:37:45.000 They race marbles?

00:37:46.000 They race marbles, but the guy who sells it is the announcer.

00:37:52.000 Because he's locked in the entire time, so they created this world.

00:37:59.000 Where it's these marble, and there's different teams the same way NASCAR are different teams, and so he talks about it in such a way.

00:38:06.000 He doesn't break at all.

00:38:07.000 You know, NBA announcers, they veer off this weekend.

00:38:12.000 No, the marble guy, he holds the concept together by just like, yeah, you know, the marble races, da-da-da-da, the 12, and, you know, last week, he's talking about other races.

00:38:22.000 Last week, they beat them by.3 seconds.

00:38:25.000 How do they race marbles?

00:38:27.000 They just drop them off.

00:38:29.000 They just roll them?

00:38:30.000 They just roll them.

00:38:31.000 This is it right here.

00:38:31.000 Yeah.

00:38:32.000 And they just...

00:38:33.000 So is there cheating?

00:38:36.000 Like, what if someone oils the marbles?

00:38:37.000 Do they get arrested?

00:38:38.000 There's no humans on camera at all.

00:38:41.000 It's just one guy or a couple people off camera, marbles in the stands.

00:38:45.000 Look at that.

00:38:45.000 Last week tonight, John Oliver has a...

00:38:47.000 That's new.

00:38:48.000 They've gotten big.

00:38:49.000 They've got sponsors now.

00:38:50.000 Yeah, that's happened over the past few months.

00:38:52.000 What?

00:38:53.000 Yeah.

00:38:53.000 This video has a million views of marbles?

00:38:55.000 Oh yeah.

00:38:56.000 The commentary is what...

00:38:59.000 It's like it's real Olympics.

00:39:07.000 Qualifiers and trials and finals and...

00:39:10.000 But there's no people at all.

00:39:12.000 And look at the stands.

00:39:13.000 There's marbles in the stands. 1.00

00:39:14.000 We're losing our fucking minds. 1.00

00:39:16.000 We're losing our fucking minds. 1.00

00:39:18.000 But that's been going since 2016. That's oddly compelling. 1.00

00:39:26.000 There's longer ones, too.

00:39:28.000 It just shows the importance of execution over...

00:39:34.000 Ideas are important, but execution is really important, because that's top-notch execution of what could be a terrible idea in the wrong hands.

00:39:43.000 Marble races.

00:39:44.000 You give me marble races, and it's not going to be that.

00:39:48.000 Yeah, some people are designed to be a commentator for marble races.

00:39:52.000 That's their thing.

00:39:52.000 Look at this one.

00:39:53.000 It's got like a little elevator, escalator, takes you to the top, conveyor belt.

00:39:58.000 What's that, Jim?

00:39:59.000 1.3 million views on this.

00:40:00.000 That's so crazy!

00:40:02.000 That is so crazy.

00:40:04.000 A bunch of people watching marbles while the world burns.

00:40:08.000 Gotta zone out, man.

00:40:09.000 Yeah, I get it.

00:40:11.000 I get it.

00:40:13.000 So, Ghana.

00:40:14.000 Have you been before?

00:40:15.000 No, I've been to Nigeria and Kenya.

00:40:19.000 Do you know anyone over there?

00:40:21.000 I know a couple folks.

00:40:23.000 Actually, what really...

00:40:25.000 I told my brother I was thinking about it.

00:40:28.000 And he says, oh, one of my old friends from work is from Ghana.

00:40:33.000 Let's all have a call.

00:40:35.000 And so we get on the call and then...

00:40:39.000 I'm thinking he's going to say, oh, restaurant recommendations is just, you know, some type of fluff, kind of helpful.

00:40:45.000 But he took the trip so serious where, okay, we're going to have you meet these people if you want to work on this.

00:40:52.000 We're going to have you do this.

00:40:54.000 And so it made me take it so serious where it went from being kind of an idea to, I guess I'm doing this.

00:41:00.000 Wow.

00:41:01.000 Because I know it's going to be kind of...

00:41:03.000 Laid out in a real structured way.

00:41:06.000 Sometimes when I've traveled, I haven't planned thoroughly like that.

00:41:10.000 So I think it's going to be exciting, man, just to get in a whole different zone.

00:41:16.000 I'm still youngish to live in another country.

00:41:21.000 Look, you're not married and you don't have kids.

00:41:22.000 This is the time to do it. 1.00

00:41:24.000 Fuck it. 1.00

00:41:25.000 Why not? 1.00

00:41:26.000 And you've been very smart with your money. 0.99

00:41:28.000 I know you invest in real estate, so you've got a bunch of shit going on that's making you money. 0.98

00:41:34.000 Why not? 1.00

00:41:34.000 Fuck it. 1.00

00:41:35.000 Go. 1.00

00:41:35.000 It's the good move. 1.00

00:41:37.000 I like it.

00:41:38.000 I like the idea just of doing something like that where you completely take yourself out of the normal life.

00:41:43.000 Because for a creative person, I think you can run dry, like in terms of inspiration and experiences.

00:41:51.000 I mean, obviously there's a lot of chaos around us right now, so there's a lot of things to draw from.

00:41:55.000 But something like going to Ghana.

00:41:57.000 All of my...

00:41:58.000 I've been making some music.

00:42:01.000 And so it's this show I've been doing called Smokin' at Church.

00:42:06.000 It's got James Earl and Jameel Bruner.

00:42:10.000 And it was my first time being around a group of people in a while that I didn't know.

00:42:17.000 When I got invited to the studio, it was...

00:42:19.000 Five or six people.

00:42:21.000 This is pre my mushroom rooftop party freakout.

00:42:25.000 But I get to the studio.

00:42:26.000 It was real nerve-wracking.

00:42:28.000 Like, man, it's five people in here.

00:42:30.000 Where am I going?

00:42:32.000 And it was re-socializing again.

00:42:35.000 I was like, hey, how y'all doing?

00:42:37.000 And hello.

00:42:38.000 And eventually calmed down.

00:42:40.000 I actually took a shot for the first time.

00:42:42.000 I hadn't drank since beginning of 2018, but I took a shot just to commemorate being around a group of people again.

00:42:52.000 And I hadn't drank since then.

00:42:56.000 And so I started making music with them, and that's been my one place I've been going to besides working at my spot.

00:43:03.000 I've been, you know, hanging out and then just going there.

00:43:06.000 I had three total places that I'd be...

00:43:08.000 Is anybody getting tested?

00:43:10.000 Uh, no.

00:43:12.000 I think we're just going on the, you don't seem like you dying act.

00:43:17.000 It's not real.

00:43:18.000 It's been, you know, I think mostly we keep it.

00:43:20.000 Do you want to get tested?

00:43:21.000 Uh, yeah.

00:43:23.000 You want to get tested today?

00:43:23.000 I can get you tested.

00:43:24.000 Sure.

00:43:25.000 Okay.

00:43:25.000 All right.

00:43:26.000 I'm going to make a test right now.

00:43:27.000 I'm going to make, while we're sitting here.

00:43:28.000 You want me?

00:43:29.000 Okay.

00:43:29.000 No, I'm going to schedule it right now.

00:43:32.000 Uh...

00:43:33.000 So, my songs that I started coming up with, They were only about vapes because that's what was happening in the studio.

00:43:43.000 I would bring a vape, somebody stole a vape from the studio or I was smoking on nicotine vape and then it was a bad vape so it gave me the itches.

00:43:51.000 And so I got about four or five songs that are just about vaping because my experiences have been really limited right now and I haven't been digging in the past.

00:44:03.000 Maybe I need to do songs about Muay Thai.

00:44:08.000 Muay Thai tracks.

00:44:10.000 Why not?

00:44:10.000 Yeah.

00:44:11.000 Muay Thai, I'm out here.

00:44:12.000 They call me Elbow.

00:44:13.000 You know I'm getting it. 0.99

00:44:15.000 You think you're going to beat me hell? 0.94

00:44:16.000 No, my roundhouse is whack. 1.00

00:44:18.000 But I'm about to kick you back. 0.82

00:44:20.000 Yeah, I'm lighting up the pads.

00:44:23.000 Catch me up in Chiang Mai.

00:44:25.000 I can't kick my leg high.

00:44:28.000 But the elbow hits you right in your temple.

00:44:31.000 And then you won't be nimble.

00:44:34.000 You'll be all limping.

00:44:36.000 I don't know.

00:44:36.000 It requires a little work, but there's something there.

00:44:39.000 Yeah, it says you got to get it out, and then you rewrite it.

00:44:42.000 Now, when you go to Ghana, do you have a plan of what you're planning on doing?

00:44:47.000 Do you want to just go there and write?

00:44:49.000 Do you want to go there and just experience life?

00:44:52.000 I think I would want to go there and work, produce, maybe even start directing out there.

00:45:04.000 Are there regular flights there?

00:45:05.000 Because a lot of places are quarantined.

00:45:07.000 I know some people that tried to go to Italy and they found out even though they're letting people back in Italy, they won't let Americans.

00:45:14.000 I think by September, I feel like, but who knows?

00:45:19.000 This world is crazy.

00:45:20.000 But there's been initiatives in Ghana that they're trying to get black Americans to come live there.

00:45:27.000 So I think the Ghanaian government would smooth out the trip.

00:45:34.000 But would it be hard to catch a flight?

00:45:37.000 How many flights are going to Ghana right now?

00:45:39.000 I'm hoping that things change in September.

00:45:43.000 I was looking at a site.

00:45:45.000 Because now there's sites like, where can you go?

00:45:49.000 So I was just looking, cabin fever web searching.

00:45:53.000 Where can I go?

00:45:55.000 And so it has each country, this world of nomad or something like that.

00:46:00.000 This is what's going on.

00:46:01.000 You can't go there.

00:46:02.000 They're only accepting private flights to certain countries.

00:46:04.000 You can fly private there.

00:46:06.000 This place, you get there, quarantine for 14 days.

00:46:09.000 So it's such a weird zone.

00:46:13.000 I thought about going...

00:46:15.000 To Newfoundland before the U.S. and Canada border was closed.

00:46:20.000 Because I started getting panicky.

00:46:22.000 And I was looking at places that had low amounts of cases.

00:46:26.000 And I saw Newfoundland.

00:46:28.000 I thought, you know what?

00:46:29.000 Maybe I'll go to Newfoundland.

00:46:30.000 And then Trudeau and Trump, they started talking about closing the border.

00:46:35.000 The Canadian U.S. border. 1.00

00:46:36.000 And I said, shit, do I? It's now or never. 1.00

00:46:39.000 Am I going to really go to Newfoundland?

00:46:41.000 Of course I didn't go.

00:46:42.000 But it was...

00:46:43.000 Newfoundland is interesting.

00:46:45.000 They're really into curling up there. 0.65

00:46:46.000 I did a show up there and I made fun of curling and people started going, hey!

00:46:50.000 They were mad.

00:46:51.000 They were mad.

00:46:52.000 You know what I think of Newfoundland?

00:46:53.000 I think of pull up this photo of Johnny Cash moose hunting in Newfoundland.

00:46:57.000 Here's another photo that we need to get turned into one of the big metal prints.

00:47:01.000 This is Johnny Cash wearing like regular clothes.

00:47:04.000 Like an old school rifle. 0.97

00:47:06.000 Like 1965 or some shit like that. 0.98

00:47:09.000 Moose hunting. 0.90

00:47:10.000 And there he is.

00:47:11.000 Hey! 0.99

00:47:12.000 Johnny Cash.

00:47:15.000 In Newfoundland.

00:47:17.000 There he is.

00:47:18.000 Look at that.

00:47:18.000 That's the photo.

00:47:19.000 That's the one.

00:47:20.000 That's the one we need.

00:47:21.000 That's the walkie-talkie.

00:47:23.000 I see a moose on the horizon.

00:47:32.000 I see the moose. 1.00

00:47:34.000 I'ma shoot it in its eyes. 1.00

00:47:36.000 Johnny motherfucking catch. 1.00

00:47:38.000 Don't try it. 1.00

00:47:39.000 I'm in Newfoundland.

00:47:41.000 Shout out to...

00:47:42.000 Man, I would have loved to meet that guy.

00:47:44.000 Is that a guitar gun?

00:47:45.000 No.

00:47:46.000 That's just a gun gun. 0.68

00:47:47.000 That's a moose head right there, son.

00:47:50.000 A lot of moose in Newfoundland.

00:47:51.000 Look at that walkie-talkie thing.

00:47:53.000 He was a baller with that thing back then.

00:47:59.000 That's like a refrigerator with an antenna.

00:48:02.000 And said a walkie.

00:48:03.000 It's Johnny.

00:48:04.000 Look at him holding on to it.

00:48:06.000 That's crazy.

00:48:07.000 They probably use them to locate game.

00:48:12.000 Call them in. 1.00

00:48:13.000 You gotta pretend that you're a female moose that wants some dick. 1.00

00:48:17.000 That's how you call them in. 1.00

00:48:18.000 You gotta go...

00:48:22.000 That's the moose call?

00:48:23.000 Yeah, that's what it sounds like.

00:48:24.000 Do they slow walk or they run up?

00:48:27.000 They slow walk.

00:48:28.000 They don't trust you.

00:48:30.000 They come slowly and they make their way around.

00:48:32.000 Usually they circle.

00:48:33.000 You could call a moose in and it could take hours before it comes to you.

00:48:38.000 Like you could call a moose in and then it gets dark and you're in your tent and you hear something stomping around the tent. 0.99

00:48:43.000 It's a moose looking for pussy. 1.00

00:48:45.000 And then you gotta kill it. 1.00

00:48:46.000 Well, you really can't. 1.00

00:48:48.000 You can't see it. 0.99

00:48:49.000 In the dark in the woods, it's fucking dark. 0.98

00:48:52.000 Like, you can't really take an ethical shot unless the moon's out. 0.99

00:48:55.000 And most places have laws against that.

00:48:58.000 Okay.

00:48:58.000 You're not allowed to shoot at night.

00:49:03.000 Hands up!

00:49:04.000 Hands up!

00:49:05.000 That's how they sound. 1.00

00:49:06.000 That's how bad they want dick. 1.00

00:49:09.000 What's an ethical shot versus an unethical shot? 1.00

00:49:12.000 You want to have a shot that you know for certain you're going to hit the animal in the vitals and it's going to die.

00:49:18.000 If you just take a shot at an animal that's really far away and you can barely see it, that's an unethical shot.

00:49:24.000 You might hit it, but you might not.

00:49:26.000 What you really want is an animal that's standing still, broadside.

00:49:32.000 If an animal is standing straight at you, you have to hit it right here.

00:49:36.000 You have a very small, maybe a softball-sized area.

00:49:40.000 No, like a cantaloupe.

00:49:42.000 Like a cantaloupe-sized area that you can hit where the heart is.

00:49:47.000 Unless you have a rifle.

00:49:49.000 If you have a rifle, it opens up a realm of possibilities. 0.91

00:49:51.000 I'll take a frontal shot with a rifle.

00:49:53.000 But if an animal is standing broadside, then you have a very large area that you can hit.

00:49:59.000 I thought an ethical shot is when the animal makes eye contact and say, do it.

00:50:05.000 Please. 0.99

00:50:06.000 I fucking hate this life. 0.99

00:50:07.000 Do it. 1.00

00:50:08.000 These bitches are moaning. 1.00

00:50:09.000 By the time I get there, another moose is always there. 1.00

00:50:12.000 I'm depressed.

00:50:13.000 I hate my job.

00:50:17.000 And when they walk in, they make noises.

00:50:23.000 That's what the moose does. 1.00

00:50:25.000 The male moose.

00:50:26.000 The bull.

00:50:29.000 You gotta make a moose sounds mixtape, soundboard.

00:50:34.000 It's one of the few animals that anybody can make the noise.

00:50:37.000 You can't make an elk noise.

00:50:38.000 Elk noises are hard.

00:50:39.000 Really?

00:50:40.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:50:42.000 I'm good at specific noises.

00:50:45.000 Sometimes I'll get them.

00:50:47.000 Have you ever heard of elk?

00:50:48.000 I'm no Michael Winslow, but every now and then there's a noise and I got it.

00:50:53.000 He's the only guy that's made a career out of noises.

00:50:56.000 Like if you say like a noise guy, like Michael Winslow as comedians, he's the known noise guy.

00:51:03.000 Pablo a little bit.

00:51:04.000 Okay, a little bit, yeah.

00:51:07.000 But either way, he's not doing an elk sound.

00:51:10.000 You ever heard an elk scream?

00:51:12.000 No.

00:51:12.000 Pull up a video of an elk scream.

00:51:14.000 It sounds like some Lord of the Rings shit. 0.99

00:51:15.000 It doesn't even sound like a real animal. 0.99

00:51:17.000 When you hear them in real life, it gives you goosebumps. 1.00

00:51:21.000 It's like, holy fuck. 0.99

00:51:22.000 If you didn't know what was making this sound, you would think there were demons in the woods. 1.00

00:51:27.000 Okay.

00:51:28.000 Have you heard them scream like this?

00:51:29.000 When they scream, it's the bulls. 0.99

00:51:31.000 They're screaming to let the cows know what's up and to let the other bulls know to step the fuck back. 1.00

00:51:36.000 So I'll back off of the mic for my... 0.99

00:51:49.000 Okay.

00:51:53.000 Nope.

00:51:54.000 It's a tough one.

00:51:55.000 Yeah, you ain't gonna do that one.

00:51:56.000 You need a tube.

00:51:57.000 You need like a Phelps Elk call. 0.97

00:52:01.000 Yeah, Phelps, that's a hand sanitizer.

00:52:03.000 If I drink a hand sanitizer?

00:52:05.000 You'll get drunk.

00:52:06.000 You'll be like Kitty Dukakis. 1.00

00:52:07.000 You don't want that shit. 0.99

00:52:08.000 This video says they're actually making two sounds at once, which is already hard enough for us to do. 1.00

00:52:13.000 But it's a whistle with a roar.

00:52:15.000 Okay.

00:52:17.000 Good luck.

00:52:19.000 And then the females have a different sound. 1.00

00:52:21.000 They're like... 1.00

00:52:25.000 Come get some pussy. 1.00

00:52:30.000 I can't do the noise of the female either. 1.00

00:52:33.000 Female's like a mew. 1.00

00:52:34.000 It's a weird sort of noise. 0.88

00:52:38.000 Point is, they make crazy noises. 0.97

00:52:41.000 I don't even know how the fuck we got on this. 0.98

00:52:44.000 Johnny Cash. 0.99

00:52:45.000 Johnny Cash hunting.

00:52:46.000 Newfoundland.

00:52:48.000 Johnny Cash.

00:52:49.000 Moose.

00:52:51.000 The noises, soundboard, and then you said making the app.

00:52:56.000 You said you're gonna get the app going with the Joe Rogan moose soundboard, and you're gonna get it.

00:53:04.000 Apps are expensive.

00:53:05.000 I don't think there's a lot of value in a soundboard with animal noises.

00:53:10.000 Sometimes you just gotta do it for the love of the game, man.

00:53:13.000 It ain't about turning a profit every time, man.

00:53:17.000 You take some L's for fun! 0.99

00:53:21.000 I wish it was easier to make an app.

00:53:22.000 I've looked into having apps made. 0.98

00:53:24.000 It's fucking complicated. 0.58

00:53:26.000 You ever made an app? 0.98

00:53:27.000 Or had an app made?

00:53:29.000 No, I haven't.

00:53:30.000 I haven't had one made.

00:53:32.000 It's complicated.

00:53:34.000 Uh, yeah, you gotta, I mean, I guess you gotta get some people.

00:53:39.000 I'm thinking about having a game made.

00:53:41.000 Really?

00:53:42.000 Yeah.

00:53:42.000 What kind?

00:53:43.000 Just, uh, on Roblox. 1.00

00:53:45.000 Oh no, my kids are addicted to that fucking game. 0.99

00:53:48.000 Just a game made based on the comedy special, loosely. 0.99

00:53:53.000 Oh, like all the subjects that you talk about in the comedy special?

00:53:56.000 I'm not sure about all, but maybe finding one angle of it and then stretching that out.

00:54:01.000 Like the arrest story?

00:54:02.000 The arrest story, maybe.

00:54:04.000 Yeah.

00:54:05.000 Something like that.

00:54:07.000 And having it be in a game.

00:54:09.000 That could work.

00:54:09.000 Jamie told me that it was Grand Theft Auto.

00:54:12.000 They have places you can go.

00:54:14.000 You can watch a comedy show, right?

00:54:16.000 Wasn't that?

00:54:16.000 Yeah, for sure, yeah.

00:54:17.000 I haven't played it since they've expanded it in the last two years.

00:54:21.000 That game came out ten years ago now.

00:54:23.000 Yeah.

00:54:23.000 Which is pretty crazy.

00:54:24.000 No, the one in New York, they had that laugh factory that was in Times Square, was on the game, and Cat Williams was on there, and I think Patrice was in the comedy club.

00:54:37.000 And you could just go in there and watch them do stand-up.

00:54:39.000 Or Patrice was on the radio, but Patrice was definitely on there.

00:54:42.000 Yeah, you could just go in there and watch them perform.

00:54:46.000 I think J.B. Smoove...

00:54:49.000 It was on the radio, too.

00:54:51.000 Grand Theft Auto.

00:54:53.000 Look at this.

00:54:55.000 That is crazy.

00:54:58.000 That is crazy.

00:55:00.000 Look at this.

00:55:04.000 That's his real intro, too.

00:55:09.000 Wow.

00:55:11.000 And this is 10-year-old graphics, too.

00:55:14.000 If they did this today, that's hilarious.

00:55:16.000 They even mimic the way he walks.

00:55:20.000 He probably did MoCat.

00:55:22.000 But look, it's a socially distanced crowd.

00:55:25.000 They didn't, you know, it's probably complicated in terms of animation to fill the crowd up.

00:55:30.000 That's wild. 0.55

00:55:31.000 Yeah, it's a shitty animation though. 0.53

00:55:33.000 Yeah, I think they had a TV or something you could just sit and let go and this might have been like a show on it or something like that.

00:55:39.000 How strange.

00:55:41.000 Split Sides Comedy Club.

00:55:45.000 Yeah, but the animation they have now, there's a new video that's out now that's got the new Unreal Engine, and we played it on here.

00:55:52.000 It doesn't even look like a video game.

00:55:54.000 When people walk, little specks of dust kick up from their feet touching the dirt.

00:56:00.000 What game?

00:56:01.000 It was basically like a...

00:56:04.000 It was just a concept, but they kind of showed like a Tomb Raider-ish.

00:56:07.000 Watch this.

00:56:08.000 Look at this.

00:56:09.000 You can look at this screen, too, if you want to face forward.

00:56:11.000 Look at this.

00:56:12.000 This shows you what all the pixels are, but this is what it looks like. 0.99

00:56:15.000 I mean, what the fuck, man? 0.99

00:56:17.000 How crazy is that? 1.00

00:56:19.000 How crazy is that?

00:56:20.000 That looks so amazing.

00:56:22.000 Unreal Engine 3, is that what it is, Jamie?

00:56:24.000 Five.

00:56:25.000 Five now.

00:56:25.000 Look at that.

00:56:27.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:56:27.000 This is fucking crazy. 1.00

00:56:30.000 So if they did that and did like you doing stand-up, they could literally get it to the point where it looks like you doing stand-up now. 0.99

00:56:38.000 Like her movement's a little odd, right? 0.94

00:56:41.000 They call that the uncanny valley, the difference between reality and like obvious bullshit. 0.89

00:56:46.000 It's like it gets real close to reality. 0.95

00:56:49.000 It makes you feel weird watching it. 0.99

00:56:51.000 Because your brain is going, am I watching bullshit or is this a real person? 1.00

00:56:56.000 God damn, that's amazing! 1.00

00:56:58.000 Like look at the graphics! 1.00

00:56:59.000 It's insane.

00:57:01.000 I dove heavy into the gaming when quarantine started.

00:57:06.000 Did you?

00:57:07.000 I played a lot of NBA 2K. And I played more than I've played in a long time because it was just...

00:57:14.000 Now I had no sleep schedule.

00:57:18.000 I was playing for 12 hours straight sometimes and just locked in like a crazy person because it was escapism.

00:57:29.000 I have a real problem with video games.

00:57:31.000 We have a whole video game room back there, like a LAN room.

00:57:34.000 I don't even go in there anymore.

00:57:36.000 I just stay away from it like I'm an alcoholic and it's a bar.

00:57:39.000 I can't go in there.

00:57:41.000 Tell him, Jamie.

00:57:42.000 We were playing hours every day to the point Jamie was telling me I had a problem.

00:57:46.000 He would leave.

00:57:47.000 He'd be like, I'm not playing anymore.

00:57:48.000 I'm like, where you going? 1.00

00:57:49.000 Get back here, bitch! 1.00

00:57:50.000 He would take off. 1.00

00:57:52.000 Go forever.

00:57:53.000 It was bad, right?

00:57:55.000 It was bad.

00:57:56.000 Like, hours and hours every day.

00:57:57.000 We would get done with the podcast.

00:57:58.000 I couldn't wait to go play.

00:58:00.000 I'd be like, goodnight, everybody! 0.99

00:58:02.000 Run right over there, boot it up, get online, start talking shit. 1.00

00:58:06.000 And we were talking crazy shit to each other. 1.00

00:58:07.000 Come on, bitch! 1.00

00:58:08.000 And just, like, killing each other. 1.00

00:58:10.000 Like, hours and hours and hours.

00:58:11.000 But when I would leave, we'd play Quake, Quake Champions.

00:58:15.000 My hands would be sweaty.

00:58:17.000 I would feel like I'm nervous.

00:58:19.000 I'd leave.

00:58:19.000 I'd be driving home and like, I don't feel good.

00:58:21.000 I feel bad.

00:58:23.000 Like I physically was feeling bad.

00:58:25.000 And then I started like sleeping bad.

00:58:27.000 I was thinking, I'm putting my body through all this crazy stress.

00:58:30.000 When you're playing, and you're locked onto that screen, and it's like this heavy, intense combat, and your hands are sweating, and you're so adrenaline jacked that when you get out of there, it's almost like you're drunk, or you just got off a drug, or you drank too much coffee or something.

00:58:45.000 You feel terrible.

00:58:46.000 Yeah, the shooters can put you in a...

00:58:48.000 I don't play Call of Duty or anything.

00:58:51.000 I play a little GTA, but that's a different energy.

00:58:54.000 2K was just really...

00:58:57.000 I was locked in and I was doing a lot of research.

00:59:00.000 I started researching how to upgrade your character.

00:59:05.000 There's the badge system where if you're a point guard, you get certain badges.

00:59:10.000 You know, the dimer and that makes you able to pass better and so all these other specific attributes you can upgrade.

00:59:18.000 How do you upgrade?

00:59:19.000 Do you have to pay?

00:59:20.000 You can pay or you can play and get the experience and then as you keep on getting points...

00:59:27.000 You get better.

00:59:28.000 You actually get better.

00:59:29.000 But then it takes a while if you're not great at the game.

00:59:32.000 So I found out that there is a service where people just will play the game and they'll just upgrade your character.

00:59:42.000 I've heard about that for those role-playing games, those gigantic multiplayer games where you'll hire people and they have like sweatshops where people just play your game constantly and then upgrade your character.

00:59:56.000 Yeah, because I was trying to upgrade the character and it was taking too long.

00:59:59.000 And I just knew there was a better way.

01:00:02.000 And then somebody told me, you don't have to do that.

01:00:05.000 You can just pay somebody 80 bucks and they'll do it over a week.

01:00:08.000 And I paid somebody and I was like, oh yeah, this is much better.

01:00:10.000 And so you paid this guy and then you came back with refreshed skills.

01:00:14.000 Character was on point.

01:00:16.000 Yeah.

01:00:16.000 Character was on point.

01:00:17.000 Because the thing is, there's the park on NBA 2K. And so that's kind of open world.

01:00:22.000 Other people have their characters.

01:00:24.000 So the park is like you're playing against other folks.

01:00:28.000 You're playing against other folks.

01:00:29.000 They have their own outfits.

01:00:30.000 And so you can see what everybody's rated.

01:00:33.000 It's real, you know, it's a real social thing going on.

01:00:37.000 Okay, everybody's here at 95, 97. Can you hear them talk shit? 0.99

01:00:42.000 I don't want to hear anybody. 1.00

01:00:44.000 I could, but I don't really like talking to folks like that because it's too direct.

01:00:48.000 What is this guy doing here, Jamie?

01:00:50.000 I wasn't trying to show you the guy talking.

01:00:51.000 I was trying to show the video of the park so you could just see the visuals of it.

01:00:55.000 But it's in the middle of this guy's video.

01:00:58.000 Oh, wow.

01:01:01.000 So yeah, that's the park.

01:01:02.000 There's different three-on-three games, two-on-two.

01:01:05.000 Oh, and so do you have to wait in line and then you get into a game?

01:01:09.000 Yeah, so those are those little circles out of waiting spots.

01:01:13.000 So you can either play randomly or you could come through.

01:01:16.000 I meet up.

01:01:17.000 That's why I meet up with people during...

01:01:19.000 Quarantine.

01:01:19.000 Me and my cousin.

01:01:20.000 Hey, you going to the park?

01:01:21.000 Yeah, let's go to the park at 7. Then we team up, and then we play against people.

01:01:25.000 Graphics are amazing.

01:01:26.000 I think this is...

01:01:27.000 This is actually live.

01:01:28.000 So they have a 2K league.

01:01:30.000 Most of the real teams have their own team.

01:01:34.000 They have standings and whatnot.

01:01:37.000 And this is what they're showing on ESPN now.

01:01:40.000 There's no real sports, but this is close.

01:01:43.000 Wow.

01:01:44.000 Yeah, sometimes you end up playing against one of those people in a random game.

01:01:49.000 You're like, oh, they're processing this way differently than I. Do I even have the same system as them?

01:01:55.000 Because how are they doing it?

01:01:57.000 Now, it's all consoles, right?

01:01:59.000 It's not on a computer.

01:02:01.000 There is...

01:02:02.000 Most players own PS4 and Xbox, but...

01:02:08.000 There is on PC and PC is where there's hackers.

01:02:13.000 I don't play on PC, but I watch videos of some PC YouTubers.

01:02:17.000 And so sometimes they'll just have a player that is 40 feet tall.

01:02:26.000 And you'll see, it's this one guy, Trey, I think his name, and his videos is him watching hacker videos, and it'll be somebody, their arms are going across the whole park.

01:02:37.000 A hacker can just kind of change the dynamic of the entire park, because I guess, yeah, you know, it's not as secure as the Xbox server.

01:02:47.000 Yeah.

01:02:48.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:02:52.000 It's hilarious.

01:02:53.000 He's like a spider.

01:02:54.000 Yeah.

01:02:54.000 Oh my god.

01:02:55.000 That's so funny.

01:02:56.000 That is so funny.

01:02:57.000 Oh my god.

01:02:59.000 Of course PC people do that.

01:03:01.000 Of course.

01:03:02.000 That's the same with Quake.

01:03:04.000 That was always a problem.

01:03:05.000 Guys that have aiming bots and they could just shoot you.

01:03:08.000 Every time you showed up anywhere, you would get hit. 0.65

01:03:10.000 Like, they never missed.

01:03:11.000 So you just couldn't beat them.

01:03:14.000 Yeah, it's a difference.

01:03:17.000 You know what game?

01:03:18.000 You hear it, Overcooked?

01:03:19.000 No.

01:03:20.000 Overcooked is a co-op game where you work in the kitchen and it's just you putting together different meals.

01:03:30.000 You and the person are going against two people.

01:03:34.000 And you all have to put together the most burgers and serve them.

01:03:37.000 This is it right here.

01:03:38.000 Oh, I do know this game. 1.00

01:03:40.000 My fucking wife and my kids play this stupid game. 1.00

01:03:43.000 Do they get hyped up during it? 1.00

01:03:45.000 They get real hyped up.

01:03:46.000 I'm like, what are you doing?

01:03:47.000 It's stressful.

01:03:48.000 You're playing pizza making. 1.00

01:03:50.000 It's so stupid. 1.00

01:03:51.000 It's something about it that it hits a different part of the brain where you get hyped and it really shows who people are under pressure and it's intense. 1.00

01:04:02.000 They start yelling at each other, get the tomatoes!

01:04:05.000 Because I was talking to my cousin.

01:04:07.000 I was talking to my cousin Percy.

01:04:08.000 I was like, why does this game get me more hyped than being in a war game and shooting people and getting shot at?

01:04:17.000 Because violence has kind of been, you know, we desensitize to it.

01:04:20.000 Video game violence, at least.

01:04:22.000 But, you know, being in a kitchen is kind of almost close to real life.

01:04:26.000 And so messing up in the kitchen...

01:04:28.000 It does something to you.

01:04:30.000 I don't know.

01:04:30.000 I played it once.

01:04:31.000 I was like, this is stupid as fuck. 1.00

01:04:32.000 I don't care what happens with this pizza. 1.00

01:04:35.000 Who was on your team?

01:04:36.000 I don't remember.

01:04:37.000 One of my daughters.

01:04:38.000 See, leadership is important in this game.

01:04:41.000 I got you a COVID test today at 6. Oh, thanks, man.

01:04:44.000 So we're good to go.

01:04:44.000 All right.

01:04:45.000 We'll find out what's up.

01:04:46.000 Also, I've got two tests for you.

01:04:48.000 The current test to find out if it's in your system and also an antibody test to see if it used to be.

01:04:54.000 You might have kicked it.

01:04:56.000 A lot of people kicked it and they didn't even know.

01:04:57.000 It's really weird.

01:04:59.000 We'll see.

01:05:01.000 What direction will my day take?

01:05:05.000 Sometimes, yeah.

01:05:06.000 I started taking a good amount of...

01:05:08.000 I take vitamin...

01:05:11.000 I take some zinc.

01:05:12.000 That's good.

01:05:13.000 Some vitamin B. B's good.

01:05:17.000 And Adderall.

01:05:20.000 That's a vitamin, right?

01:05:21.000 No, I don't think so.

01:05:24.000 It feels like maybe the best vitamin.

01:05:28.000 No, D is very important.

01:05:31.000 D is real important.

01:05:34.000 Yeah.

01:05:35.000 Especially...

01:05:35.000 Whoa.

01:05:37.000 Hey, man.

01:05:38.000 Sneaky.

01:05:39.000 Hey, dawg. 0.70

01:05:39.000 You look like a magician. 0.70

01:05:40.000 Got jackets, got...

01:05:41.000 I had no idea.

01:05:43.000 I'd just be in my house with stuff.

01:05:45.000 I was like, you know what?

01:05:46.000 I gotta bring some of this stuff.

01:05:47.000 How are you feeling without doing stand-up?

01:05:49.000 Is it weirding you out?

01:05:53.000 Um...

01:05:53.000 No.

01:05:54.000 You know, dropping a special...

01:05:58.000 Made it kind of weird just because there's a lot of movement that's usually associated with a release, you know, going to do TV. Usually you in New York and L.A., you probably pop up at the comedy club a couple times that week.

01:06:15.000 And so that was that was kind of a very weird, foreign feeling to have a big drop.

01:06:24.000 And I think that's what kind of led to me throwing a little jam on my roof.

01:06:29.000 I was like, it feels too weird.

01:06:32.000 I gotta have some type of little gathering, you know what I mean?

01:06:38.000 But yeah, I've been getting...

01:06:40.000 My outlet has been music as far as just being able to hang out and crack jokes and be creative.

01:06:49.000 And I've been seeing it.

01:06:50.000 There's drive-through shows happening.

01:06:51.000 I'm thinking about doing some drive-through, some drive-in screenings.

01:06:55.000 Bert Kreischer's been doing a lot of that.

01:06:57.000 Yeah?

01:06:57.000 Yeah, he did one with Miss Pat and Jesus Trejo.

01:07:01.000 It looked like fun, man.

01:07:02.000 They're on stage and they had 700 cars.

01:07:05.000 That's how they put it.

01:07:06.000 Instead of like 700 people in the audience, they had 700 cars.

01:07:10.000 And Bert's got a video of it.

01:07:11.000 It's pretty badass.

01:07:12.000 When the people are applauding at the end, they're honking their horn and flashing their lights.

01:07:16.000 And he said it was like UFOs landing.

01:07:19.000 It's wild.

01:07:20.000 It's all these headlights, 700 cars.

01:07:22.000 Are they all on stage at once?

01:07:26.000 No, no.

01:07:27.000 I mean, they did sets.

01:07:28.000 I mean, they did it like a comedy show.

01:07:30.000 Okay.

01:07:30.000 Yeah.

01:07:31.000 Because that's the thing that I wonder about as a performer.

01:07:35.000 Look at that, grilling.

01:07:36.000 And trying to ride the wave, you know what I mean?

01:07:39.000 Right.

01:07:40.000 But look at that, Miss Pat.

01:07:41.000 There she is.

01:07:41.000 Oh, so people outside their cars kicking it.

01:07:43.000 Look, man, this is wild.

01:07:45.000 That looks like a lot of fun.

01:07:46.000 He said it was great.

01:07:47.000 He loved it.

01:07:48.000 He said the fans were going nuts.

01:07:49.000 But he did some shows.

01:07:51.000 He did one show in Oklahoma, and they were supposed to socially distant.

01:07:54.000 It was supposed to be 120 people in the audience.

01:07:57.000 There was 347 people.

01:07:59.000 They stuffed him into the place, and he was like, I don't feel safe in here. 0.99

01:08:03.000 Like, what the fuck are they doing? 0.98

01:08:04.000 Like, what did they do? 0.99

01:08:05.000 No one had masks on.

01:08:06.000 Like, 10 people had masks on.

01:08:08.000 This is them at the end.

01:08:09.000 See, this is like real social distancing, right?

01:08:12.000 As long as they're all tested, and look at that, look at all the crowds, all the cars.

01:08:17.000 They had fireworks!

01:08:20.000 And this was Burt's idea, all his idea.

01:08:24.000 Drive-in movie theaters are making a comeback now.

01:08:27.000 There's a movie that's out now. 0.99

01:08:29.000 This is a fucking horror movie that's supposed to be real good. 0.99

01:08:32.000 It's like a one-word name. 1.00

01:08:34.000 About a haunted house or some shit. 0.98

01:08:36.000 It looks fun. 0.96

01:08:37.000 But they're releasing it July 3rd in drive-in movie theaters and then July 10th on demand.

01:08:45.000 So, like, they're doing everything now.

01:08:47.000 Like, basically, movies have to come out on your Apple TV or Amazon or whatever.

01:08:52.000 Which I love.

01:08:53.000 I don't want to go to the movies.

01:08:54.000 But I want the movies to stay open.

01:08:56.000 Yeah.

01:08:57.000 I want to...

01:08:57.000 Maybe I'll do...

01:09:01.000 Just, yeah, putting a special out is kind of reignited. 0.99

01:09:07.000 I want to get in front of a crowd again and just talk some shit, man. 0.98

01:09:13.000 You think you're going to do stand-up in Ghana? 0.99

01:09:15.000 Yeah.

01:09:16.000 They speak a lot of English there?

01:09:17.000 Yeah, they speak a lot of English.

01:09:19.000 Wow.

01:09:21.000 It's going to be a great trip.

01:09:23.000 It was, you know, my first traveling, I went to...

01:09:30.000 The whole situation kind of had me feeling stuck, even though I could have been making moves or doing, you know, in March and April, where I could have been doing stuff, but I kind of, because of media and just everything, I just kind of felt trapped in the crib, even though there was still options.

01:09:47.000 And so towards the end of May, My sister lives in Phoenix.

01:09:51.000 I'm going to go visit them and stay in Phoenix.

01:09:55.000 And just getting prepped for the trip was so...

01:10:00.000 Because I hadn't used my book bag in months.

01:10:03.000 And just all the little stuff that came with traveling...

01:10:06.000 When I found my book bag, it felt like, you know, a warrior picking up his sword.

01:10:10.000 But it was like, oh!

01:10:11.000 I genuinely, I teared up, like, getting my bag again. 1.00

01:10:16.000 Because I hadn't, it was like, oh yeah, I used to go to shit and do shit. 0.99

01:10:21.000 And picking my bag up made me emotional. 0.99

01:10:25.000 And then being there at their place, you know, I live alone, so it's a family of four, two teenagers.

01:10:34.000 So it was nice to be in a house with structure.

01:10:38.000 They work from home now, but...

01:10:41.000 You know, the kids got school.

01:10:42.000 So it was night because I would go to bed sometimes at 8 in the morning just because I had nothing.

01:10:48.000 I was just, you know, going to bed at 8, waking up at weird, waking up at midnight sometimes.

01:10:55.000 The life of a comedian, man.

01:10:56.000 I had a crazy schedule, man.

01:10:59.000 So it was just nice to be in a...

01:11:01.000 Like, whoa, whoa, this is a functioning...

01:11:04.000 Oh, this is what, you know, structured normalcy is.

01:11:08.000 And it was really helpful for me.

01:11:11.000 I needed it.

01:11:12.000 Just being around them after that time and hanging with my nephew and niece.

01:11:17.000 It was really necessary.

01:11:19.000 It makes you appreciate, like, normal...

01:11:21.000 Like, one of the things about the lockdown, it makes me appreciate, like, meals.

01:11:25.000 Like, sitting down and having meals with my family.

01:11:27.000 We didn't go to any restaurants at all for, like, three months.

01:11:31.000 It makes you appreciate.

01:11:33.000 It made me appreciate having food.

01:11:37.000 Because in the beginning I was thinking, what if we run out of food?

01:11:40.000 What do we do?

01:11:42.000 I have a gun and I have bullets and I know how to hunt.

01:11:45.000 And I know where some deer are in my neighborhood.

01:11:47.000 I've been keeping an eye on them. 0.95

01:11:48.000 No bullshit. 0.90

01:11:50.000 Just in case. 0.99

01:11:51.000 Just in case shit gets weird. 0.98

01:11:53.000 You ain't got no vegetables in the garden? 0.99

01:11:56.000 You straight to the deer?

01:11:57.000 Well, it's between vegetables and deer.

01:11:59.000 You can't live that long on a small garden.

01:12:03.000 Yeah.

01:12:03.000 You can live for months on a deer.

01:12:06.000 I can shoot one deer and I'll eat that fucker for three or four months. 1.00

01:12:10.000 Wow. 1.00

01:12:10.000 But if you have like four tomato plants and like some kale, you got some celery, good luck. 1.00

01:12:16.000 You got like three salads out of that shit. 1.00

01:12:19.000 I know a few people that bought guns when shit was first starting to go down. 1.00

01:12:25.000 A lot of people bought guns. 0.97

01:12:27.000 A lot of people came to me and asked, like, how do you get one?

01:12:30.000 What do I have to do?

01:12:32.000 They were asking.

01:12:33.000 People that were negative about guns before.

01:12:36.000 I have a buddy of mine, his wife's like, you're never getting a gun. 1.00

01:12:39.000 We're never having a gun in this house.

01:12:40.000 He's like, okay, fine.

01:12:41.000 The lockdown happened, she goes, you gotta get a gun. 0.98

01:12:44.000 Immediately.

01:12:44.000 Right away.

01:12:45.000 And he called me up laughing.

01:12:46.000 She told me I have to get a gun.

01:12:48.000 I'm like, ha!

01:12:50.000 Hey, people change their minds.

01:12:52.000 They change their minds in front of real danger.

01:12:54.000 It's real danger, you know? 0.99

01:12:57.000 When shit was getting real weird. 0.99

01:12:58.000 And this was before the riots and the looting. 0.99

01:13:00.000 This was just during the lockdown.

01:13:03.000 People started getting nervous about food.

01:13:04.000 They started seeing people have fist fights over toilet paper. 1.00

01:13:08.000 Like, whoa, people are losing their shit. 0.99

01:13:11.000 The toilet paper situation was really shocking to see because I had lots of wipes anyways, just in general. 0.99

01:13:19.000 I just had lots of wipes on deck.

01:13:22.000 Yeah, and you're going to be okay if you have a washcloth and some water. 1.00

01:13:26.000 You can wipe your ass. 1.00

01:13:27.000 It's not that big a deal. 1.00

01:13:28.000 You need food.

01:13:30.000 That's what you need.

01:13:31.000 I mean, you could clean a washcloth.

01:13:33.000 As long as you have water, do you have water and soap?

01:13:35.000 Well, you're good.

01:13:36.000 You don't really need toilet paper.

01:13:38.000 You're going to be okay.

01:13:40.000 You need food. 0.99

01:13:41.000 Yeah, you don't want to put that shit on the washcloths, really, though, unless it gets dicey. 0.99

01:13:46.000 You do what you got to do. 0.99

01:13:47.000 It's no big deal.

01:13:48.000 You do what you got to do.

01:13:50.000 When it's time to go number two and the apocalypse come for you.

01:13:57.000 2020. 2020. Without a doubt, the weirdest year ever.

01:14:03.000 Right?

01:14:05.000 In my adulthood.

01:14:07.000 My whole life.

01:14:09.000 There's no time ever weirder.

01:14:12.000 Yeah, the global pandemic.

01:14:15.000 You know, I was...

01:14:19.000 My girlfriend lives in Hong Kong and we met out there over the holiday.

01:14:30.000 And so she was over here. 0.99

01:14:32.000 Hong Kong is going through some shit right now. 1.00

01:14:34.000 Hong Kong is going through some shit. 1.00

01:14:36.000 But she had the early window on COVID. So she was heading back there at the beginning of February. 0.98

01:14:47.000 And she was looking for masks while we were in New York. 1.00

01:14:52.000 And shit. 0.99

01:14:53.000 And it was like February 2nd, 3rd. 1.00

01:14:57.000 She was looking for masks.

01:14:59.000 And I'm like, y'all need some masks to go back?

01:15:02.000 I was like, why you gonna go back there? 0.99

01:15:04.000 It's fucking crazy. 0.96

01:15:05.000 And so I remember, you know, I FaceTimed and she'd be at work with a mask on just like, you know, February 15th, 16th, that zone. 0.99

01:15:15.000 And I would look at her like, that's crazy.

01:15:18.000 Look at...

01:15:22.000 Look at y'all.

01:15:24.000 Nobody's at work?

01:15:25.000 That's insane!

01:15:27.000 What?

01:15:28.000 You just sitting there with a mask on all the time?

01:15:32.000 Wow!

01:15:33.000 What is that like?

01:15:35.000 Little did I know.

01:15:36.000 I would find out.

01:15:37.000 Little did you know.

01:15:39.000 That's normal life now.

01:15:40.000 I was really oblivious thinking, oh, that's over there. 1.00

01:15:46.000 I got an early look at the shit. 1.00

01:15:49.000 It was just like, oh, damn, that sucks. 1.00

01:15:52.000 I was really telling her, you should escape there and come here. 1.00

01:15:56.000 And what?

01:15:59.000 Hong Kong's safer now.

01:16:00.000 You should wait it out over here.

01:16:03.000 It's so bonkers to look back at.

01:16:07.000 No, come to America. 1.00

01:16:08.000 We don't got that shit over like it's in Hong Kong. 1.00

01:16:11.000 Man, it's insane. 1.00

01:16:14.000 Now, unenthroned, crazy COVID jam session.

01:16:18.000 Who knows?

01:16:19.000 And then being worried about it.

01:16:20.000 And then had a full-on meltdown.

01:16:25.000 Like, real, like, walked up to the...

01:16:29.000 Just try to...

01:16:31.000 You know, it's one thing to sit down at a house party, but, like, shut down a jam session and just, like, walk up to the keyboard.

01:16:38.000 It's like...

01:16:40.000 Yeah, looking at the drummer like, no, no, no.

01:16:43.000 Keep everybody alive.

01:16:43.000 What we need is a test that you can just, like a real quick saliva test.

01:16:48.000 Senses style.

01:16:49.000 Yeah, but just everybody walks in, lick that thing. 1.00

01:16:52.000 Okay, you're good.

01:16:53.000 Okay, you're good.

01:16:54.000 Okay, you're good.

01:16:55.000 Oh, you're not good.

01:16:57.000 Like, know who's clean, let everybody in.

01:17:00.000 Yeah.

01:17:01.000 I mean, if we did that, it would change everything.

01:17:03.000 If they had some sort of a test, like a real easy saliva test.

01:17:07.000 Just lick it and you know. 1.00

01:17:09.000 We could wipe this shit out in a week. 1.00

01:17:12.000 The test now is all... 1.00

01:17:14.000 What do you mean?

01:17:17.000 Oh, no, it's easy now.

01:17:18.000 It used to be like that.

01:17:20.000 It used to go deep in your nostrils.

01:17:21.000 Like way up into your sinus cavity.

01:17:24.000 But now it's just the inside of your nose.

01:17:26.000 It's nothing.

01:17:26.000 No discomfort at all.

01:17:28.000 It's like a little Q-tip.

01:17:29.000 It just goes inside the nose.

01:17:30.000 They swab it around a little bit for like 10 seconds.

01:17:33.000 They dip it into some sort of a solution.

01:17:34.000 They send it off, and you'll know tomorrow.

01:17:36.000 And then the antibody test that you'll do.

01:17:38.000 This is the FDA-approved antibody test.

01:17:41.000 You just squeeze your finger like that.

01:17:43.000 They put a little prick on the tip of your finger.

01:17:46.000 A little blood comes out.

01:17:47.000 They put it in a thing, and you know in 10 minutes.

01:17:49.000 Okay.

01:17:49.000 It's easy.

01:17:51.000 I'm sure you're fine.

01:17:52.000 I'm looking at you right now.

01:17:53.000 I feel good.

01:17:54.000 I'm good at this.

01:17:55.000 Trust me.

01:17:56.000 Let me see.

01:17:57.000 You're good.

01:17:58.000 I think you're good.

01:18:00.000 I'm good.

01:18:06.000 Do you like sit down and write your stand-up or do you just like have ideas and work them out on stage?

01:18:13.000 A little bit of both.

01:18:17.000 Yeah, I'll write some and then just have some ideas.

01:18:21.000 Here's my COVID game show idea.

01:18:26.000 You get four people, line them up, put masks on them, and it's a game show called Who Said That?

01:18:35.000 Because everybody got a mask on.

01:18:37.000 Who said that?

01:18:39.000 And then...

01:18:41.000 My other one is a bad joke.

01:18:43.000 You gotta get these out your system before you hit it.

01:18:47.000 Now everybody's wearing masks.

01:18:51.000 The bank robber's gotta write robber on his mask.

01:18:57.000 You've been spending a lot of time alone.

01:19:00.000 This is strange.

01:19:02.000 You know, folks, COVID is crazy.

01:19:06.000 What is this obsession with becoming a game show host that you have in your special?

01:19:14.000 It's not an obsession.

01:19:15.000 Trust me.

01:19:15.000 I've done it.

01:19:16.000 Don't do it.

01:19:17.000 It's not an obsession.

01:19:19.000 It's just kind of, you know, that's the career path that happens.

01:19:22.000 And I have been offered a lot of game shows.

01:19:25.000 And I say not yet.

01:19:27.000 They come with a large cheddar.

01:19:29.000 Yeah.

01:19:29.000 They haven't made it undeniable for me on the game show side yet.

01:19:35.000 If I was in the same position I was when I took Fear Factor, I'd take it again.

01:19:39.000 Because it changed my life.

01:19:40.000 Changed my life.

01:19:41.000 Gave me freedom.

01:19:42.000 Like, real freedom.

01:19:43.000 But it's a job.

01:19:45.000 There's a big difference between doing that and doing stand-up.

01:19:48.000 When you do stand-up, you're having fun.

01:19:50.000 When you're doing Fear Factor, sometimes you're having fun.

01:19:52.000 But it's a job.

01:19:53.000 You're working.

01:19:54.000 It was a great job.

01:19:56.000 Don't get me wrong.

01:19:57.000 Yeah.

01:19:58.000 That's why I think on the game show side, I really just got to put my energy into who said that?

01:20:05.000 The COVID game show.

01:20:07.000 What if Steve Harvey retires from Family Feud?

01:20:09.000 That's an easy one.

01:20:10.000 I would do Family Feud.

01:20:12.000 I wouldn't do Family Feud.

01:20:13.000 It's an easy one.

01:20:14.000 No.

01:20:15.000 It's an easy one.

01:20:15.000 Survey says!

01:20:17.000 I remember back when Richard Dawkins hosted it. 0.99

01:20:19.000 Then you in the airport and just people asking you random shit. 0.99

01:20:23.000 Good point. 1.00

01:20:26.000 Good point.

01:20:26.000 And then they just, you know.

01:20:27.000 What about Drew Carey's got prices right?

01:20:29.000 That's an easy one.

01:20:30.000 It looks easy.

01:20:31.000 I don't think it's just, I don't think it's for me.

01:20:34.000 I enjoy some of them, but just me and what I think, as a regular gig, I gotta be the one creating it.

01:20:43.000 The thing about the Drew Carey thing, though, Drew Carey seems like he's just stacking money.

01:20:48.000 He's stacking money like no one even knows about it.

01:20:51.000 Oh, Pat Sajak.

01:20:52.000 Wheel of Fortune's been on for my entire life.

01:20:55.000 Right, but Pat Sajak's not a comic.

01:20:58.000 What did he do before Wheel of Fortune?

01:20:59.000 He didn't do anything.

01:21:00.000 He was born on the set.

01:21:03.000 He grew up there.

01:21:05.000 He's been doing that forever.

01:21:07.000 He's not a comic, though.

01:21:08.000 Maybe he was at one point in time, maybe?

01:21:11.000 I don't think so, though.

01:21:12.000 He's not a comic.

01:21:13.000 Have you ever heard of Pat Sajak?

01:21:14.000 He was a former weatherman and talk show host.

01:21:16.000 There you go.

01:21:17.000 Yeah, that makes sense.

01:21:18.000 Yeah, so he hit the jackpot.

01:21:20.000 But who else?

01:21:21.000 What other comics have done game shows?

01:21:24.000 Howie Mandel.

01:21:26.000 Howie...

01:21:26.000 He's done a gang of them, right?

01:21:28.000 He had that one Deal or No Deal.

01:21:30.000 He had more than one, right?

01:21:32.000 And he did...

01:21:33.000 Oh, that was Deal or No...

01:21:34.000 That was Deal or No Deal.

01:21:35.000 I was thinking of something else.

01:21:38.000 Deal or No Deal was a winner.

01:21:40.000 Why did they ever stop that show?

01:21:44.000 Well, not live now.

01:21:45.000 I think they were touring it, I think.

01:21:47.000 I don't know if it's...

01:21:48.000 It moved to CNBC instead of primetime TV. It's still being produced all the time.

01:21:53.000 Who wants to be a millionaire is still on TV. See, I don't think I've quite sold you on who said that, so let's really dive into the concept.

01:22:03.000 Okay, four people wearing masks.

01:22:04.000 Four people wearing masks.

01:22:07.000 Somebody says something.

01:22:09.000 I would like it if one of them was COVID positive.

01:22:11.000 One of them COVID positive?

01:22:13.000 Yeah.

01:22:13.000 Why?

01:22:14.000 Just for the fucker. 1.00

01:22:15.000 Just for the fucker. 1.00

01:22:16.000 Up the stakes. 1.00

01:22:16.000 That's season three, when people get bored. 1.00

01:22:18.000 Yeah, season three.

01:22:19.000 Season three are COVID. And then once somebody says something...

01:22:24.000 But it's not much movement.

01:22:26.000 Right.

01:22:26.000 You gotta guess.

01:22:27.000 You gotta just guess.

01:22:28.000 Yeah, you gotta guess.

01:22:29.000 Who said that?

01:22:30.000 30 second episodes.

01:22:33.000 You shoot 500 of them in a day.

01:22:37.000 It's on YouTube.

01:22:39.000 It's not a bad idea.

01:22:43.000 Who said that?

01:22:45.000 Was it him?

01:22:47.000 Who said that?

01:22:49.000 Was it Tim?

01:22:51.000 Was it Jim?

01:22:52.000 Jesus Christ.

01:22:54.000 How high did you get before you came here?

01:22:56.000 No, this is me, man.

01:22:58.000 CBD. It's the Kill Cliff CBD. These are good, right?

01:23:01.000 Very addictive.

01:23:02.000 He's a smooth.

01:23:02.000 Good for you.

01:23:03.000 Yeah.

01:23:04.000 I'm addicted to these.

01:23:06.000 That actually is not a bad idea for a show.

01:23:09.000 As long as they didn't, like, you could guess.

01:23:12.000 And especially if it's like they said things that were like closely related to what they did, like maybe you can ask them what they did and then figure out who would say what.

01:23:27.000 I think keeping it simple and quick for these short attention spans.

01:23:33.000 And then maybe that's somebody that becomes a legend on the show.

01:23:37.000 And they just kind of...

01:23:38.000 It's somebody...

01:23:38.000 And maybe it's scripted.

01:23:39.000 Maybe it's real.

01:23:41.000 But it's somebody that says, who said that?

01:23:43.000 Boom! 0.99

01:23:43.000 And they say, whoa, that was fast. 0.99

01:23:46.000 They just know.

01:23:47.000 This episode's over.

01:23:48.000 Intro's longer than the episode.

01:23:50.000 Intro's 15 seconds.

01:23:51.000 Episode, four seconds.

01:23:54.000 Now...

01:23:54.000 Let me know.

01:23:55.000 Let me know how this sells.

01:23:57.000 I'm gonna, um, yeah.

01:23:58.000 Take it out.

01:23:59.000 I'm gonna take it, I'm gonna take it out onto, you know, the video conferencing circuit, just different, do some meetings.

01:24:05.000 I think they're filming things now because Felipe had a thing on his Instagram where he said he's on a new show.

01:24:14.000 Or it might be a movie.

01:24:15.000 And they're going to the set on Monday.

01:24:18.000 And he's all excited. 0.97

01:24:19.000 He was talking about the protocols and all the different shit they have to do for COVID. But they're fucking filming. 0.99

01:24:25.000 But what I was saying is if you're filming, you have to go home at the end of the day. 0.99

01:24:30.000 What if you go home and you go out and you catch it?

01:24:33.000 And then you come back to the set.

01:24:34.000 How often are they testing you?

01:24:35.000 I don't know.

01:24:39.000 And if someone gets it, like if you're the star and you get it, What do they do?

01:24:43.000 They lock the show down for two weeks and then come back?

01:24:46.000 If the star gets it, I think...

01:24:49.000 I heard they say it goes by number on the call sheet.

01:24:53.000 So if the star gets it, then they cough in everybody else's mouth and then herd immunity and then the show goes on because, you know...

01:25:03.000 What'd you say?

01:25:04.000 I think when this was happening, or starting, Tyler Perry's production team was saying that they were going to lock the whole team down in quarantine together in one hotel, and then they all go to the set.

01:25:15.000 So nobody leaves.

01:25:16.000 Right, yeah.

01:25:17.000 Everybody gets tested.

01:25:18.000 Tyler Perry can do that, though, because he's got his own studio.

01:25:22.000 He's his own boss.

01:25:23.000 He's got it locked up. 1.00

01:25:25.000 He doesn't have to deal with any bullshit. 0.99

01:25:28.000 He's all non-union. 0.99

01:25:29.000 He's got a complete system.

01:25:32.000 I think I heard they do it quicker than normal, too.

01:25:34.000 They do it in a couple weeks as opposed to like a month or two.

01:25:39.000 Yeah.

01:25:40.000 He's got an island. 1.00

01:25:41.000 Tyler Perry's got a fucking island. 1.00

01:25:42.000 Yeah? 1.00

01:25:43.000 That's next level.

01:25:45.000 You gonna get an island?

01:25:46.000 No.

01:25:46.000 No?

01:25:47.000 No.

01:25:47.000 I'm not interested in an island.

01:25:49.000 You really?

01:25:50.000 No.

01:25:51.000 You should've?

01:25:52.000 Because you...

01:25:53.000 I want a ranch.

01:25:54.000 I don't want an island.

01:25:55.000 You might want...

01:25:56.000 Because remember...

01:25:56.000 I think last time I was on here...

01:25:59.000 The time before that, I was talking about getting a Tesla and you said, don't get a Tesla.

01:26:04.000 Now you got a Tesla.

01:26:05.000 Yeah, but that was...

01:26:06.000 That's true.

01:26:08.000 But I got that because Elon talked me into it.

01:26:11.000 He was willing to do my show.

01:26:12.000 I said, all right, man, I'll buy a Tesla because he did my show.

01:26:16.000 But then once I got it, I was like, he's right.

01:26:18.000 It's dope. 0.55

01:26:20.000 You have one?

01:26:21.000 Dude.

01:26:22.000 They're the craziest cars ever. 1.00

01:26:23.000 Like, every other car seems dumb. 0.99

01:26:25.000 It's so fast. 0.99

01:26:27.000 It's so fast it doesn't even make sense.

01:26:29.000 Like, it defies physics.

01:26:31.000 It just goes.

01:26:33.000 It takes off, like, and then you got this giant screen for the navigation, and then it drives itself.

01:26:39.000 The driving itself part.

01:26:41.000 It's amazing.

01:26:42.000 Everything's amazing about it.

01:26:43.000 You can play video games on it.

01:26:45.000 It got that fart thing, too.

01:26:47.000 It's got the fart thing if you hit the blinkers, if you like to do that.

01:26:50.000 The fart.

01:26:52.000 It's a solid car.

01:26:53.000 What kind of car do you drive?

01:26:55.000 I got an Infiniti.

01:26:56.000 It's not mine.

01:26:58.000 I started renting, I was renting from this guy and I was starting to shop for a car and then the pandemic happened.

01:27:03.000 So then I just- Just held on to this guy's car?

01:27:05.000 I held on to the rental because I didn't know if I was just going to, I had to escape.

01:27:10.000 I probably drove it once or twice the entire month of April.

01:27:14.000 But you have a lot of money.

01:27:15.000 Why wouldn't you just get a car?

01:27:16.000 I was shopping for cars, but then pandemic.

01:27:19.000 Oh, okay.

01:27:20.000 Yeah, I was shopping in early March.

01:27:23.000 So you were renting this to see if you like it?

01:27:24.000 No, I was just renting it because I would rent through this app, Turo.

01:27:28.000 It's like Airbnb for cars.

01:27:29.000 And then I started just renting directly from this guy because less fees for him.

01:27:34.000 You know what I mean?

01:27:35.000 And we'd just text and he'd bring a car.

01:27:37.000 It was smooth.

01:27:38.000 And I was starting to look for a car because it wasn't making sense to keep renting from him.

01:27:43.000 And then, you know, COVID. I was chopping for a car, and then the virus came and said stop.

01:27:51.000 I saw the Carvana, you saw Carvana commercials they put on Hoot?

01:27:55.000 What's Carvana?

01:27:56.000 Carvana's like, we'll bring the car to you, and then we'll socially, they deliver. 0.96

01:28:02.000 Socially distanced car delivery.

01:28:04.000 But they're breathing in the car.

01:28:05.000 How are they doing that?

01:28:06.000 Buy a car, and I don't know.

01:28:08.000 They're driving.

01:28:09.000 So they have to touch it.

01:28:11.000 Maybe they...

01:28:12.000 Maybe they wear a hazmat suit.

01:28:14.000 I don't know how they...

01:28:14.000 There it is.

01:28:15.000 Oh! 0.60

01:28:15.000 They drop it off on the back of a truck. 0.60

01:28:18.000 Yeah.

01:28:20.000 Carvana.

01:28:20.000 I should've...

01:28:22.000 Wow.

01:28:23.000 They have 11,850 vehicles and they just drop it off on a flatbed and they don't even touch it.

01:28:30.000 The new way to buy a car.

01:28:32.000 Wow.

01:28:33.000 Have it or pick it up at a vending machine.

01:28:38.000 You seem like a dude who would like a fun car.

01:28:40.000 You need something fun in your life.

01:28:43.000 Dodge Dart?

01:28:45.000 Dodge Dart on 22s?

01:28:49.000 They're still doing that in Miami.

01:28:51.000 I was in Miami and they had these like a Caprice Classic on giant... 0.99

01:28:57.000 I saw a BMW 7 Series on these giant fucking wheels. 0.98

01:29:00.000 They look like they're 27 inch wheels. 0.99

01:29:03.000 It's like a wagon.

01:29:05.000 Like you're driving around in an old covered wagon.

01:29:08.000 Yeah, you gotta have solid parking skills for that or you're gonna scuff the rims on it too.

01:29:13.000 You gotta be parking good each time.

01:29:15.000 You gotta be careful with your parallel parking.

01:29:17.000 My parallel parking game is I've just given up and gone around the block again sometimes.

01:29:26.000 Where I thought about just going to some type of school, just a specialized, just a parallel parking intensive course.

01:29:38.000 Get a car that does it for you.

01:29:41.000 There's a certain Lexus, the sedan, that you just press a button and it'll parallel park.

01:29:46.000 I know that there's some that'll do it, but you want to be able to...

01:29:51.000 Because it's not like I can't.

01:29:53.000 Sometimes I nail it, and then other times it's just...

01:29:56.000 It's practice.

01:29:58.000 Think about when you first started doing stand-up.

01:29:59.000 You probably weren't as good as you are now.

01:30:01.000 You got to practice.

01:30:03.000 Yeah.

01:30:04.000 Just go somewhere with his cars.

01:30:07.000 Start parking.

01:30:08.000 Just park a lot.

01:30:09.000 Just take a day.

01:30:10.000 Just take a day.

01:30:11.000 Yeah, Saturday's park day.

01:30:12.000 Parking.

01:30:13.000 Parking all day with a full tank of gas.

01:30:15.000 Try it on busy streets.

01:30:17.000 That's the real thing is the pressure parking when the people behind you, they're giving you room, but then you got to kind of block out that noise.

01:30:25.000 Yep.

01:30:26.000 Yeah.

01:30:27.000 Speaking of noise, how have the fighters liked being in the situation now?

01:30:35.000 Some love it.

01:30:36.000 Some love it?

01:30:37.000 Yeah.

01:30:37.000 I think some miss the crowd, but some love it because, first of all, it's real quiet, no distractions.

01:30:45.000 You don't have the energy of people screaming at you.

01:30:47.000 You can just focus on the fight.

01:30:49.000 And it's a lot like just being in a gym.

01:30:52.000 It's a lot like sparring.

01:30:54.000 So you could look at it that way.

01:30:56.000 I like it as a commentator.

01:30:58.000 I was just talking to Louis C.K. about this.

01:31:02.000 I was like, I don't know if it's better.

01:31:05.000 I kind of like it.

01:31:08.000 I miss the crowd in some ways, but I kind of like no crowd.

01:31:13.000 Because you can focus?

01:31:14.000 Yeah, they're different.

01:31:15.000 They're different things. 0.82

01:31:17.000 Like, one of them is insane. 0.87

01:31:20.000 Like, if you go to a Conor McGregor fight, and it's in a packed T-Mobile arena, and Sinead O'Connor's screaming, singing, and the fucking green mist is on the air and everything, it's wild. 0.96

01:31:31.000 It's a spectacle. 0.93

01:31:33.000 But there's something about the Apex Center where it's just me and Daniel Cormier and John Anik and fucking Bruce Buffer screaming to nobody. 0.92

01:31:42.000 There's nobody in the arena. 0.86

01:31:44.000 And then the fighters walk out.

01:31:46.000 It's weird. 0.98

01:31:47.000 And then when they're hitting each other, man, you hear fucking everything. 0.99

01:31:51.000 You hear every shot to the ribs. 0.99

01:31:53.000 You hear the...

01:31:54.000 You hear breathing heavy.

01:31:56.000 You hear wincing. 1.00

01:31:57.000 You hear all that shit. 1.00

01:32:00.000 You hear them talk shit to each other. 1.00

01:32:03.000 It's very different. 1.00

01:32:05.000 It's very different. 0.96

01:32:06.000 There's something stunning about someone getting really fucked up where there's no crowd noise. 0.97

01:32:12.000 Like Francis Ngannou, who's the scariest person on the planet Earth. 0.97

01:32:15.000 He knocked out Jarzino Rosenstreich in like 20 seconds.

01:32:19.000 And Rosenstreich is also a big scary dude.

01:32:22.000 You know who Francis is?

01:32:24.000 I know who Francis is. 1.00

01:32:24.000 Fuck, he's terrifying. 1.00

01:32:26.000 And all he has to do is connect on people, right? 1.00

01:32:28.000 So he BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! And Rosenstreich is out cold and there's no sound.

01:32:34.000 It's just him walking off. 0.99

01:32:36.000 Rosenstreich's out cold and we're sitting there going, holy shit. 0.99

01:32:40.000 This is wild. 0.99

01:32:41.000 It's like there's no one there.

01:32:43.000 There's no scream of the crowd.

01:32:45.000 It's just...

01:32:46.000 The violence of it all, the explosion is so stunning.

01:32:49.000 It's all...

01:32:50.000 It's stunning.

01:32:51.000 It's weird.

01:32:52.000 I wonder what's...

01:32:53.000 If you're gonna take an L, I wonder what is better for the psyche to not...

01:32:58.000 It's probably to not have that cheer.

01:33:00.000 Right.

01:33:00.000 Because then it's like a regular street fight.

01:33:03.000 It is like sparring where you don't get to hear 20,000 people cheering your potential concussion.

01:33:10.000 As long as you stay offline for a couple weeks.

01:33:12.000 Yeah.

01:33:13.000 You just get off Twitter...

01:33:15.000 The fact that people go on people's social media that are fighters to taunt them after they lose a fight.

01:33:23.000 Are you going to go square up?

01:33:25.000 You got knocked out.

01:33:27.000 Yeah, by a pro.

01:33:30.000 It feels like a weird move to dig in. 1.00

01:33:34.000 It's a bitch move. 1.00

01:33:35.000 It's a bitch move for sure, but it's a real common bitch move. 1.00

01:33:39.000 It's 100% guaranteed it's going to happen. 0.98

01:33:41.000 If you get flatlined, someone's going to come along and go, and they're going to have that thing from Friday with Chris Tucker. 1.00

01:33:47.000 You got knocked the fuck out! 0.99

01:33:48.000 They're going to have that. 1.00

01:33:50.000 That's going to come up.

01:33:51.000 Chris Tucker and Ice Cube.

01:33:52.000 You're going to have people taunt you Like, some guys are fine with it.

01:33:57.000 Like, Ben Askren, who got knocked out by Jorge Masvidal.

01:34:00.000 Fastest knockout in history.

01:34:01.000 It was just a one-year anniversary of it a couple of days ago.

01:34:04.000 And he was like, oh, great.

01:34:06.000 Like, he was saying, imagine your most embarrassing moment.

01:34:10.000 And they celebrate it with a one-year anniversary.

01:34:14.000 Slow-mo.

01:34:15.000 Yeah, but that one was a packed audience.

01:34:19.000 And everybody went, wow!

01:34:21.000 And it lasted a long time, the screams and the cheers.

01:34:24.000 And he was out for a long time, too.

01:34:27.000 I don't know if that would be better if there was no one there.

01:34:29.000 It would be stunning if there was...

01:34:31.000 I think I like it better with no one there, man.

01:34:34.000 I don't know.

01:34:34.000 I love both of them.

01:34:35.000 But I might like it a hair better with no crowd.

01:34:40.000 I wonder if it's too small of a sample size to decide, but have you seen any change in fighting styles at all?

01:34:51.000 Or is it something different in the performance?

01:34:54.000 Nah, I don't think so.

01:34:56.000 Maybe they've been a little wilder.

01:34:59.000 But I just think it's also like fighters didn't get to fight for months.

01:35:03.000 So everybody was kind of chomping at the bit.

01:35:05.000 And also, there's a lot of eyes on them.

01:35:09.000 So everybody realized that this is the only game in town.

01:35:12.000 There's no other sport.

01:35:13.000 There's no other sports right now that are running except for the UFC. And the Marble Races. 0.59

01:35:20.000 And the Marble Races. 0.94

01:35:22.000 And the Floor is Lava.

01:35:25.000 Floor is Lava.

01:35:26.000 Shout out Floor is Lava.

01:35:28.000 Shout out to Rutledge Wood.

01:35:30.000 I don't know if any other sports are coming back anytime soon.

01:35:35.000 NBA is soon.

01:35:37.000 You know what I heard they're working on?

01:35:38.000 They're working on a thing where there's going to be an app on your phone and you'll be able to make noise and that noise will be piped into the arena.

01:35:49.000 So like each individual person, you'll have a seat and your seat will be making noise.

01:35:55.000 Oh, now how you feel about the Moose soundboard idea.

01:36:02.000 Now you see it coming together.

01:36:05.000 Now we have a launch pad for it.

01:36:07.000 Perfect.

01:36:08.000 NBA bubble season.

01:36:10.000 Boom.

01:36:10.000 Now this is a profitable app.

01:36:11.000 I have to feel that people are going to organize shit where they're going to chant and say things and have fun. 0.91

01:36:20.000 There'll be things where people will get together and try to figure out. 0.99

01:36:24.000 Maybe sing a song.

01:36:25.000 You have everybody together all singing a song at the exact same time.

01:36:30.000 Yeah.

01:36:31.000 You can do, you know.

01:36:33.000 We don't want the virus.

01:36:38.000 We wish we could be there, but this is alright.

01:36:43.000 Better than nothing.

01:36:44.000 Basketball's back.

01:36:46.000 NBA playoff game.

01:36:47.000 Imagine there's no heaven.

01:36:57.000 Amazing.

01:36:58.000 Never know. 0.99

01:37:00.000 Well, listen, one of the things that's come out of this is a lot of people have gotten real creative with shit. 0.98

01:37:07.000 They've found ways to make things interesting. 0.99

01:37:10.000 They've found ways to have fun.

01:37:14.000 I like when people are confronted with real adversity and challenges because you get to see how the human imagination works.

01:37:21.000 You see creativity.

01:37:23.000 Yeah, it just, you know, for me, it helped me kind of, it helped me think about the other people in my life and who I work with and just how to highlight and produce for them better since I was able to sit.

01:37:37.000 Oh, I was thinking about my uncle, Kelvin.

01:37:41.000 He used to deal at casinos in the Chicago area from mid to late 90s, early, probably 10 years or so.

01:37:52.000 He's a character.

01:37:54.000 I had a gambling problem for a little bit.

01:37:58.000 Did you?

01:37:58.000 Yeah.

01:37:59.000 What kind?

01:38:00.000 Sports and casino.

01:38:03.000 A lot of sports.

01:38:04.000 When you say gambling problem, what made it a problem?

01:38:07.000 What made it a problem is that it was really taking up a lot of time.

01:38:11.000 And I'd never gotten to real trouble just because I was, you know, constantly working.

01:38:17.000 I had great weeks.

01:38:18.000 I had bad weeks.

01:38:19.000 But it was just if you're, you know, betting on stuff every other day or whatever, then that means you're kind of on tilt and not able to function most of the time.

01:38:29.000 And this is when you were drinking a lot, too.

01:38:30.000 This is when I was drinking a lot of tula.

01:38:32.000 So drinking and gambling together.

01:38:34.000 I was drinking and gambling.

01:38:35.000 Woo! 0.99

01:38:35.000 And then getting up at midnight. 0.99

01:38:37.000 No, that was...

01:38:39.000 That's quarantine sleep schedule. 0.85

01:38:42.000 My regular sleep schedule was, you know, drunk stuff, you know, 4 or 5 a.m.

01:38:47.000 But...

01:38:47.000 How'd you kick it?

01:38:49.000 Kick the...

01:38:50.000 Gambling habit.

01:38:50.000 The gambling...

01:38:51.000 I had to just really take a look at what I was doing and then how it was serving me.

01:38:58.000 And look at the other stuff that I was doing, and that's also gambling, investing.

01:39:02.000 So realizing I had that outlet.

01:39:04.000 It just wasn't in sports or throwing some dice, but you can gamble by investing in a company early.

01:39:13.000 You can gamble by getting a building.

01:39:16.000 You can gamble by trying to produce your own show out of pocket.

01:39:20.000 All of these other things are gambling.

01:39:22.000 Yeah, sort of.

01:39:23.000 It's more of an invest, though.

01:39:25.000 It's an invest, but if it, you know, investments go bust.

01:39:28.000 Companies, you know, people done put, you know, millions of dollars, billions into companies.

01:39:33.000 That Quibi. 0.95

01:39:35.000 And so that was an investment.

01:39:38.000 And people, they were really hyped about it and wrote big checks.

01:39:42.000 So it was realizing that and just realizing that, you know, When I was looking at a game, it would take up time because I would get really into it and research the history with teams and look at all these other matchups.

01:39:57.000 And so I could spend that time and mental energy on something else that's more productive.

01:40:06.000 Well, that's a wise way of looking at it, but a lot of people don't...

01:40:09.000 When they get sucked into something, it's very hard to get...

01:40:12.000 We were just talking about video games, about my addiction to video games.

01:40:16.000 I just had to go cold turkey. 0.96

01:40:18.000 I just had to step away and go, I can't fucking do this anymore. 0.97

01:40:21.000 And I figured it out and I stopped.

01:40:23.000 But that's not easy to do sometimes.

01:40:26.000 Sometimes, whatever it is about gambling, whatever switches that pops off in your brain that gives you that dopamine charge...

01:40:34.000 Yeah.

01:40:35.000 I mean, there's certain bets that are just super pleasurable.

01:40:43.000 If you bet the total in an NBA game, if you bet over and you're there live...

01:40:51.000 The total is what the two teams will score, 200 points.

01:40:56.000 And you're rooting for every score.

01:40:59.000 Everybody.

01:41:00.000 Everybody.

01:41:00.000 You're just, yeah, yeah, free throws.

01:41:02.000 You're like, yeah, free throws!

01:41:05.000 So to have, you know, a couple grand on a game and you're rooting for both teams live?

01:41:11.000 I didn't know you could do that.

01:41:12.000 What's wrong with this guy?

01:41:13.000 Any total score, yeah, hockey, whatever, soccer, if the goals are over three, then you're rooting for both teams.

01:41:22.000 You don't care if it's, you know, two to two or four to nothing or 54. That's exciting.

01:41:28.000 Yeah, the over bet is super high.

01:41:31.000 Jamie, you gamble a little, right?

01:41:33.000 Yeah.

01:41:34.000 You gamble on fights, too, right?

01:41:36.000 Yeah, sure. 0.99

01:41:37.000 It's more fun to gamble on the over-under on rounds and shit, too. 0.97

01:41:41.000 You're like, don't, don't, hang on, hang on, hang on. 0.99

01:41:44.000 Right, right, right, yeah.

01:41:45.000 Who did I... I'm trying to think of some memorable fights I had some money.

01:41:50.000 I think I had...

01:41:53.000 I had Rumble Johnson against...

01:41:58.000 Texera.

01:41:59.000 Oh, that was a brutal knockout.

01:42:02.000 I had Rumble.

01:42:03.000 I take Rumble over everybody except Cormier.

01:42:05.000 For whatever reason, Cormier's got his number.

01:42:07.000 But Rumble hits anybody, they go night-night.

01:42:10.000 He's coming back.

01:42:12.000 He's bored.

01:42:13.000 So he's coming back.

01:42:14.000 Might come back as a heavyweight.

01:42:15.000 Oh, wow.

01:42:16.000 He's huge now. 0.99

01:42:17.000 I mean fucking huge. 0.99

01:42:19.000 Like 250? 1.00

01:42:21.000 Gigantic.

01:42:23.000 I'll tell you my craziest gambling story.

01:42:26.000 I've told it on stage, but this is where it was really bonkers.

01:42:34.000 So I started, I was bedding with a bookie, but I'll use a site, you know.

01:42:44.000 But it was, you know, if I won, the guy would send money.

01:42:47.000 He'd send a bunch of money and $500 money orders.

01:42:51.000 Or, you know, I would just send PayPal, whatever.

01:42:55.000 And it was like that.

01:42:56.000 But the thing was that since you could just do it like that, it made it...

01:43:00.000 It's like sending a text.

01:43:02.000 You're just doing it on a site.

01:43:03.000 And so it doesn't...

01:43:04.000 It's not the same as holding the cash...

01:43:08.000 And bedding, what you really have to think about is you just typed it real quick.

01:43:12.000 And so you're doing, you know, these large beds.

01:43:14.000 So after a while, my tolerance was I needed more and I was on a hot streak.

01:43:19.000 And so I asked my friend for another bookie with a higher limit because the limit on my one was like two grand.

01:43:27.000 And so he found this.

01:43:29.000 He knew this guy that do five thousand a game.

01:43:35.000 That gets intense.

01:43:36.000 But then it's 5,000 on the honors.

01:43:39.000 So you're not putting up five each time.

01:43:41.000 Because if I was putting up five with my physical each time, I probably would.

01:43:47.000 But because it was like five and five and I had a hot streak, I was betting on a lot of hockey at this time.

01:43:54.000 And I was getting, I had a hot streak on hockey so much and my gambling buddies, Bozeman and CJ, they started calling me Hockey Hannibal because I just was betting on, Vegas Golden Knights were doing really well.

01:44:04.000 That was their first season and Blackhawks were hitting some stuff.

01:44:08.000 So I was doing parlay.

01:44:10.000 So if you parlay a $5,000 bet with, you know, with the total of something, then that five is, you know, 12, 15 wins.

01:44:21.000 So I had a good run after a week.

01:44:24.000 I was up $100,000 cash.

01:44:29.000 But I'd never put in any money.

01:44:32.000 So I got this $100,000 from type.

01:44:35.000 And so I meet up with the guy in Chicago.

01:44:38.000 And, uh, and I mean, I pull up next to his car and he hand me a hundred grand cash and a brown paperback.

01:44:46.000 Whoa! 0.71

01:44:48.000 Did you do like the Demi Moore thing where you throw the money on the bed and roll around naked?

01:44:52.000 No, I put it on the table and kind of just really looked at...

01:44:58.000 I kept it kind of cool.

01:45:01.000 I just put it on the table.

01:45:03.000 All hundreds?

01:45:05.000 Yeah, all hundreds.

01:45:06.000 How big is $100,000 in all hundreds?

01:45:09.000 It's not great.

01:45:11.000 It's a lot, but it's not massive.

01:45:15.000 It's not like 20s.

01:45:16.000 It's a couple.

01:45:16.000 It's a few stacks.

01:45:17.000 Yeah.

01:45:20.000 And so because there was no real effort to get that money, I didn't value it like that.

01:45:28.000 And so in my head, the gambler's mind is not happy.

01:45:33.000 And so I was like, you know what?

01:45:36.000 Let's get him for $100 more.

01:45:38.000 And the next week proceeded to go down.

01:45:44.000 Go down like 90 grand out of that hundred.

01:45:47.000 And so he starts hitting me up.

01:45:49.000 Hey, I get that 90. And so I was too prideful at the time.

01:45:55.000 I didn't want to give him the cash.

01:45:57.000 We had an agreement to do PayPal on some stuff, but he, of course, he didn't want to do PayPal for no 90. He didn't want to do PayPal for, you know, it was two, three.

01:46:09.000 But I was in a zone of, I can't deal with giving this cash back.

01:46:15.000 And so he's asking for it.

01:46:20.000 And I PayPal him the 90 grand. 1.00

01:46:24.000 And then he sends that shit back. 1.00

01:46:29.000 So now we playing hot potato. 1.00

01:46:33.000 He wants the cash.

01:46:34.000 Playing internet hot potato with $90,000.

01:46:40.000 And yeah, so it was just really, it was intense because I was like, yo, is this?

01:46:45.000 And then he hit me up.

01:46:46.000 Hey, we see you going to be in Brooklyn.

01:46:50.000 Oh, no.

01:46:51.000 Yeah.

01:46:52.000 And so I try to, I puff up and just kind of say, hey, you don't want to show up to Brooklyn, dog. 0.99

01:46:57.000 I got to make sure you, like, I tried to talk some shit to, hey, man, you don't come to Brooklyn, you're going to get touched. 0.99

01:47:02.000 Like, don't come to my show. 0.99

01:47:04.000 You said that?

01:47:04.000 Yeah, I texted that thing, like, don't come through Brooklyn.

01:47:07.000 You said you're going to get touched?

01:47:09.000 I texted.

01:47:10.000 I was just trying to, I was out of my mind.

01:47:12.000 I was on tilt, man. 0.98

01:47:15.000 I was being ridiculous. 0.86

01:47:18.000 Because I didn't want to welch, but I just didn't want to pay like that. 0.91

01:47:22.000 And so eventually...

01:47:23.000 You tried to pay.

01:47:24.000 We sent it back, and eventually he just took it.

01:47:27.000 But yeah, that was...

01:47:29.000 Eventually he took what?

01:47:30.000 The PayPal?

01:47:31.000 The 90 via PayPal.

01:47:32.000 Even though that probably was a heat.

01:47:34.000 Yeah, that's bad for the taxes. 0.82

01:47:36.000 That's bad for taxes or whatever.

01:47:37.000 And so I actually called him this week.

01:47:40.000 I was like, yo, sorry, man.

01:47:43.000 I was bugging back then.

01:47:47.000 Says, yo, that was poor form on my part.

01:47:52.000 My bad.

01:47:53.000 I don't gamble no more.

01:47:55.000 Sorry to put you through that and bring heat on you.

01:47:59.000 But that was the wildest one, man.

01:48:03.000 It just had me in a real irrational zone.

01:48:08.000 Delete all that.

01:48:09.000 My friend Derek.

01:48:12.000 My friend Dana White, the president of the UFC, he lost a million in a day.

01:48:16.000 Yeah?

01:48:16.000 A million.

01:48:17.000 Playing, well, it's playing, no, blackjack. 0.61

01:48:20.000 Yeah, playing blackjack.

01:48:22.000 Million.

01:48:23.000 Million dollars.

01:48:23.000 He won seven million in a day.

01:48:26.000 Seven. 1.00

01:48:27.000 So he's doing crazy shit. 1.00

01:48:29.000 Wow. 1.00

01:48:30.000 Yeah.

01:48:30.000 And he's very wealthy.

01:48:33.000 So, like, the only way he's getting a charge is if he does some crazy shit. 1.00

01:48:38.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:48:39.000 That's madness.

01:48:40.000 That's intense.

01:48:42.000 That's hand-sweaty.

01:48:43.000 I get hand-sweaty talking about that.

01:48:46.000 Like, oh, God.

01:48:47.000 Because I don't ever want to be that guy, but I could be that guy.

01:48:50.000 Like, if I got into gambling...

01:48:52.000 I was gambling for a while on the UFC before I decided it probably wasn't a good look.

01:48:57.000 This was, like, the early...

01:48:59.000 Early 2000s, but the early 2000s, it was stealing money, right? 0.99

01:49:03.000 Because there was a bunch of guys coming in like Anderson Silva, and I would look at the odds with Anderson Silva over Chris Leib, and I'm like, are you out of your fucking mind? 0.97

01:49:09.000 This is a 100% fight. 0.99

01:49:11.000 Like, bet the house on the Brazilian! 1.00

01:49:14.000 Jesus Christ!

01:49:14.000 There was a few of those.

01:49:16.000 And I did it for a while, and then I stopped, but my business partner in Onnit, he was gambling all the time, so I would just sit down with him before the fights.

01:49:23.000 And so I was like, this way my conscience is clear, but we were like 85, 87%.

01:49:29.000 Like, he was stealing money, because I know all these fighters.

01:49:33.000 I know the fights.

01:49:35.000 Like, there's fights where a guy would be like slightly favored, and I'm like, slightly?

01:49:38.000 Like this is a hundred percent fight or there's a guy that was the underdog that like this is totally lopsided This is and still to this day sometimes they get it wrong still to this day I'll look at someone like I'm like how is that guy the underdog doesn't make any sense and then the fight will be like a Domination by the guy was the underdog.

01:49:55.000 I'm like, okay I should have bet that yeah, but I don't bet on them But my business partner at on it man.

01:50:01.000 We made all he made You know, I made it for him, but we called a lot.

01:50:06.000 I mean, literally high 80%.

01:50:08.000 It was just stealing money. 1.00

01:50:10.000 Damn. 1.00

01:50:11.000 Yeah. 0.99

01:50:12.000 But that's barely gambling.

01:50:13.000 That's kind of gambling, but that's like, I mean, it's gambling.

01:50:17.000 Fights are crazy. 0.99

01:50:17.000 Anything can happen, but some shit you know. 0.99

01:50:21.000 Right. 0.99

01:50:22.000 I remember hitting you up for tips sometimes before.

01:50:27.000 I was like, hey, who do you like going on? 0.99

01:50:28.000 Did I ever fuck you over? 0.99

01:50:29.000 Did any of them ever turn bad? 0.99

01:50:31.000 I think most of them were solid.

01:50:33.000 Most of them were solid when I hit you up.

01:50:36.000 So it hit me like, oh, me and my uncle should do a gambling podcast.

01:50:43.000 Society sort of has some focus.

01:50:45.000 He has it from the dealer perspective and he gambles too.

01:50:48.000 But he's seen...

01:50:49.000 It's a fascinating perspective just to watch from that side where you're facilitating people losing lots of money and you get paid $10, $15 an hour and you're just kind of the messenger or you're helping.

01:51:04.000 And so his stories are wild, man.

01:51:06.000 And so sitting in quarantine, oh yeah, we should do that.

01:51:10.000 Gambling podcast I did, and that's easy to do, and we can do it remotely for now.

01:51:14.000 And then we tried one out, and it was a good feeling.

01:51:19.000 Oh, yeah, this is a good—this is a dope show.

01:51:23.000 It's fun to do, and we can— You know, get other gamblers on and just really talk about it.

01:51:29.000 And just, of course, not encourage people.

01:51:31.000 I think I got to have something up top.

01:51:33.000 This is not an endorsement to gamble.

01:51:34.000 I'm just telling a story.

01:51:36.000 We do not... 1.00

01:51:37.000 Gambler, you might lose your shit. 1.00

01:51:38.000 Don't spend your college money. 1.00

01:51:40.000 Don't spend your Zoom college money.

01:51:42.000 Don't spend your kids' teleconference lecture fun.

01:51:48.000 But...

01:51:52.000 What was the craziest one he said?

01:51:54.000 What's the nuttiest gambles that he saw?

01:51:56.000 He's just seen people lose a few hundred thousand in a quick sitting.

01:52:08.000 He's just seeing people really fall apart, and people really...

01:52:13.000 I was fortunate, but some people really lose their whole lives just on chance, on some cards, on some...

01:52:22.000 And they go crazy, too.

01:52:23.000 They go crazy.

01:52:23.000 They lose, and they can't believe it.

01:52:24.000 They just want to jump out of a fucking building. 0.99

01:52:26.000 That's why when you go to Vegas, all the windows in the casinos, they don't open wide up. 0.99

01:52:31.000 They don't let you just jump off, because there would be people jumping off every couple of days.

01:52:35.000 Yeah, man.

01:52:37.000 When Vegas was wide open, all the hundreds of thousands and millions of people coming in there, and how many of them are just blowing insane chunks of cash?

01:52:45.000 They don't pay for those places on the buffet. 0.85

01:52:48.000 That's not what pays for those big buildings.

01:52:50.000 It's people gambling.

01:52:51.000 People losing.

01:52:52.000 Losing.

01:52:53.000 I watched this documentary on Amazon that something on the edge, gambling on the edge or something, where he's a card counting guy.

01:53:06.000 And it's just, you know, it's just mostly just him getting kicked out of casinos and hitting camera footage because they just come up to him, hey, we don't want your action anymore.

01:53:15.000 How weird is that?

01:53:16.000 You can't count cards.

01:53:18.000 You can't be good at what you're doing.

01:53:20.000 No, I mean, they're not in that business.

01:53:22.000 Hey, they say you can play any game here except for blackjack.

01:53:26.000 They kick people out.

01:53:27.000 People get beat up.

01:53:29.000 They kick Dana out of the palms for winning.

01:53:34.000 So he pulled the UFC from the palms. 1.00

01:53:36.000 I was like, fuck you. 1.00

01:53:38.000 Oh, because they didn't know it was him? 1.00

01:53:39.000 They knew it was him.

01:53:41.000 They knew it was him.

01:53:42.000 They used to have the fights there.

01:53:44.000 And then they kicked him out of there.

01:53:45.000 They said, you can't gamble here anymore.

01:53:46.000 He's like, what?

01:53:48.000 You were fine if I lost, but as soon as you win, they'll just put the kibosh on you.

01:53:52.000 Yeah.

01:53:53.000 That's strange.

01:53:55.000 I mean, the casino business, they were one of the first companies to start asking for four days into the lockdown. 0.97

01:54:04.000 Y'all been whooping motherfuckers for years and years, and the world shut down for a few days, and you get your hand out? 0.98

01:54:12.000 Yeah. 0.99

01:54:13.000 There's a lot of businesses needed money constantly coming in.

01:54:17.000 They can't just exist.

01:54:19.000 The way they're set up, they need that.

01:54:22.000 And no one ever thought there was going to be something that shut everything down, where no money was coming in for months and months.

01:54:30.000 That's never happened.

01:54:32.000 You can't make a business model based on something that's never happened before, so everybody thought the money was going to keep flowing in.

01:54:38.000 Yeah, man.

01:54:40.000 This was actually the first year that I kind of planned out the entire year.

01:54:50.000 I had a full-on, okay, January, I was supposed to do the porn awards, but I ended up not doing it.

01:54:56.000 Did you get to do the ABN awards?

01:54:57.000 I think so.

01:54:59.000 Yeah, but then last minute I was like, I probably shouldn't do the porn awards.

01:55:02.000 Yeah.

01:55:05.000 Then February, All-Star Weekend.

01:55:07.000 March was South by Southwest.

01:55:09.000 April was a 420 thing.

01:55:11.000 May was something.

01:55:12.000 June was, I was going to go to the Olympics.

01:55:15.000 And then, like, I had, you know, I wanted to have one major event each month.

01:55:20.000 That was the first time I planned out the year before.

01:55:23.000 Just have experiences.

01:55:25.000 Yeah, experiences and then kind of build the tour around, you know.

01:55:29.000 Go to the Olympics, also do some shows in Korea and around Japan a little bit.

01:55:35.000 And then it was like, nope!

01:55:38.000 When did you film Miami Nights?

01:55:40.000 Miami Nights we filmed August of last year.

01:55:44.000 Oh, wow!

01:55:44.000 Yeah.

01:55:45.000 Why were you holding on to it so long?

01:55:47.000 It was just...

01:55:50.000 Just getting stuff right.

01:55:55.000 We filmed it twice, actually.

01:55:57.000 I filmed it in February of last year and then didn't like how it came out.

01:56:04.000 And then I did it again, both out-of-pocket shoots.

01:56:08.000 Oh, wow.

01:56:08.000 Yeah.

01:56:09.000 But it was the right decision to do it again.

01:56:12.000 How many shows did you film?

01:56:15.000 Two shows each time.

01:56:16.000 You do four, right?

01:56:17.000 I do four now.

01:56:18.000 Yeah.

01:56:19.000 I did two before, and I did it in Denver.

01:56:21.000 The first show, some lady heckled. 1.00

01:56:23.000 I'm like, oh my god, that bit's dead. 1.00

01:56:25.000 Now I'm fucked. 0.99

01:56:26.000 Now I have to get it right on the second show. 0.99

01:56:27.000 It was a lot of pressure.

01:56:28.000 With one bit, though, if you riff...

01:56:31.000 It was a big bit.

01:56:32.000 Yeah, it was a big bit.

01:56:33.000 It was a big bit.

01:56:33.000 It was a bit that led up to another bit, too.

01:56:35.000 There was a lot to it.

01:56:36.000 They piled on together.

01:56:38.000 Yeah.

01:56:39.000 And the way she did it, it was like, oh, come on, prove it! 0.58

01:56:42.000 It wasn't even a good heckle.

01:56:45.000 Yeah. 0.97

01:56:45.000 It was like, just give me some time, dummy. 0.97

01:56:48.000 I know what I'm doing here. 0.83

01:56:49.000 Yeah.

01:56:50.000 But then I did four, and when I did four, I did four for Triggered.

01:56:57.000 And I did it out of pocket.

01:56:58.000 Like, Netflix had a certain amount budgeted out, but I said, I want to do four.

01:57:01.000 And the idea was that if I did four...

01:57:04.000 When I went on stage for the first one, it was like it was a regular show.

01:57:07.000 I had no nerves.

01:57:09.000 I didn't feel like, oh my god, I gotta get this right.

01:57:12.000 If I get this right, my second show will be loose.

01:57:14.000 I didn't feel that at all.

01:57:15.000 I just went out, what's up?

01:57:16.000 It was just totally normal.

01:57:19.000 Which one did you use most of the footage from?

01:57:22.000 Out of four.

01:57:23.000 I don't remember.

01:57:24.000 On Triggered, I think it was probably the second night.

01:57:28.000 But on Strange Times, my last one, a lot of it was the first show.

01:57:33.000 Because I was just so pumped up right out of the gate.

01:57:36.000 I was so excited.

01:57:38.000 And I was ready.

01:57:39.000 Like, I... I've done specials before where I didn't plan enough, but now when I do a special, I treat it like I'm training.

01:57:48.000 I want to be like I'm running a marathon.

01:57:51.000 I put those miles in.

01:57:53.000 So when I get onto that stage the night of the show, everything's oiled up.

01:57:57.000 Everything's just...

01:57:59.000 Greased and smooth and just every words in place and the experience of doing stand-up is so deeply ingrained in me It's just a nightly thing every night two three shows bang [...

01:58:18.000 I did it.

01:58:19.000 I'm done Nice break.

01:58:22.000 Yeah, it uh it So yeah, we filmed in August.

01:58:27.000 I did a screening in November, the beginning of November, because I didn't want to send it to folks first to shop.

01:58:37.000 I had an event for it.

01:58:40.000 I wanted to kind of create an experience around it versus somebody kind of watching it all dry in their office.

01:58:48.000 So I threw a party, you know, had We had some weed mint company, weed drinks, you know, food truck.

01:58:56.000 We made a mixtape just for the food truck and I wanted to have this whole thing.

01:59:06.000 Got some offers, but it just didn't feel great about them.

01:59:13.000 And just once, you know, I had an offer in the beginning of March, and then I was sitting on it for a little bit.

01:59:21.000 And then in May, I mean, I agreed to, and then I decided I'd rather drop it on my own because the world is crumbling.

01:59:29.000 And so I need to mix it up.

01:59:31.000 So I'd rather, you know, give it a shot.

01:59:33.000 Because if I put it up there, The benefit would have been, oh, I'm touring.

01:59:42.000 I'm going to tour in the fall, and it'll fill up.

01:59:46.000 The tour will go crazy because it's up there.

01:59:49.000 But then that went away, and it's like, well, now it doesn't look as great.

01:59:53.000 And so I'd rather gamble on my own and just see what's up.

01:59:57.000 So I decided to put it on YouTube and see what's up.

02:00:01.000 Yeah.

02:00:02.000 I think it's a good move to put things on YouTube.

02:00:04.000 I mean, it worked out real great for Andrew Schultz.

02:00:06.000 Mark Norman, it worked out real great for him.

02:00:09.000 He loves it.

02:00:10.000 He's got like more than two million views in like a couple of weeks.

02:00:14.000 Yeah, it's been a month of some change for him because I was tracking his just to see how the numbers. 0.99

02:00:19.000 One thing too is that I could take that shit down. 0.71

02:00:22.000 I could re-edit actually some bits that I might put that Thailand bit back in there about the king of Thailand. 0.95

02:00:29.000 So just the freedom to be able to, you know what, this is the other edition.

02:00:33.000 Boom! 0.99

02:00:34.000 And that'd be, oh, I can take this down.

02:00:36.000 Here it is with only the French redubbing. 0.85

02:00:40.000 I have some French voiceover person do the bits and that's going to be up for this week.

02:00:45.000 And so it just lets me be creative and try more stuff and And it can still go to one of the places afterwards.

02:00:54.000 It's just right now I'm doing what I want with it.

02:00:57.000 And you can do it all yourself.

02:00:59.000 You can edit it all yourself.

02:01:01.000 You don't need anybody.

02:01:02.000 I think a lot of comics are going to look to that in terms of accessibility.

02:01:08.000 Right now Netflix has the market cornered.

02:01:10.000 But Amazon is sneaking in. 1.00

02:01:12.000 Gaffigan had a real good experience at Amazon, and he said that they got real excited about it.

02:01:16.000 They had a lot of views.

02:01:18.000 They were very excited.

02:01:19.000 It was the most viewed hour they had in a long period of time.

02:01:23.000 So he said they're going to do more.

02:01:27.000 The thing about doing something on YouTube is everyone can see it.

02:01:30.000 The whole world.

02:01:31.000 And you see it on your phone.

02:01:32.000 Instant.

02:01:33.000 Like that.

02:01:33.000 Anytime you want.

02:01:34.000 You're on a bus, you're on a train, you're driving in your car, you can listen to it.

02:01:38.000 Instantly.

02:01:38.000 Yeah.

02:01:38.000 People share the link more so than they would share the other links.

02:01:43.000 Yeah.

02:01:43.000 And they share a link and you never have to worry about it if you have the app.

02:01:46.000 Everybody has fucking YouTube. 0.71

02:01:47.000 And even if you don't have it, your browser opens up and you get it. 0.99

02:01:50.000 Yeah.

02:01:50.000 Yeah, so we worked hard on it, man.

02:01:55.000 It's one, just because of the situation with the false arrest.

02:01:59.000 It's really super personal because I kind of had to keep living that story every time I told it and then live it in the edit.

02:02:12.000 It's just a funny situation, too.

02:02:14.000 You're drunk and this guy is arresting you for going back into a bar.

02:02:20.000 So it wasn't that bar.

02:02:22.000 I hadn't been in that bar.

02:02:23.000 You went to a different bar.

02:02:23.000 I went to the bar after we spoke.

02:02:26.000 I went to the bar, but he was upset about what I said, so he follows me into the bar.

02:02:31.000 But then, you know, they cut it on their body cam footage.

02:02:36.000 They cut it and made me look crazy. 1.00

02:02:37.000 He really left his post and followed me to be on bullshit. 0.98

02:02:43.000 Did he wind up getting fired? 0.99

02:02:47.000 I don't know.

02:02:48.000 I think he's still on the force.

02:02:50.000 For now.

02:02:51.000 That's abusive.

02:02:53.000 Yeah, that's the thing.

02:02:54.000 It's a lot of...

02:02:55.000 It's a lot of emotion and ego.

02:02:58.000 Emotion.

02:02:58.000 A lot of ego-based policing on the super petty side, you know?

02:03:05.000 Where there's obviously the issues on the extreme...

02:03:09.000 With the killings, those are terrible. 0.99

02:03:11.000 But then, there's a lot of motherfuckers that are ruining lives with petty arrests because somebody got to go, they got to miss work or something. 1.00

02:03:19.000 You don't motherfuckers get mad because they got looked at the wrong way. 0.99

02:03:23.000 And then people got to go to... 1.00

02:03:28.000 A cop should be able to handle somebody talking a little shit to them drunk. 1.00

02:03:32.000 You're a cop in Miami, you should be used to a motherfucker talking a little drunk shit to you without you putting the cuffs on him. 1.00

02:03:37.000 And if you can't, you shouldn't be a cop. 1.00

02:03:39.000 You're supposed to be better than us.

02:03:41.000 Yes.

02:03:42.000 Because it's less of you.

02:03:44.000 You should be better than us. 1.00

02:03:45.000 You should have the mental fortitude and not freak out because somebody said some shit that you don't like. 0.99

02:03:51.000 And you have extreme responsibility. 1.00

02:03:53.000 You have a gun on your hip in front of everybody.

02:03:57.000 It's not like whether or not I don't know you have a gun or you might have a gun.

02:04:00.000 No, you definitely have a gun.

02:04:02.000 It's right there. 0.99

02:04:03.000 And you're allowed to shoot people. 0.99

02:04:05.000 You're allowed to. 0.92

02:04:06.000 It's part of your job. 0.99

02:04:07.000 You're trained to shoot people. 0.95

02:04:09.000 It's part of your job. 0.88

02:04:09.000 You have to be elevated. 0.88

02:04:11.000 You have to be above normal discourse. 1.00

02:04:14.000 You have to be able to handle all kinds of shit. 0.98

02:04:16.000 And the reality is that's not the case with most people that are police officers. 0.99

02:04:20.000 Yeah, man. 0.98

02:04:21.000 Even that cop, I was walking away from him, but I was just talking hella shit because he just followed me into a bar. 0.99

02:04:29.000 And so I'm walking away. 0.99

02:04:31.000 And so that shit was really, you know, I say, I absolutely instigated that situation, but it wasn't an arrestable thing. 0.99

02:04:43.000 And the cost I had to pay for that is pretty high as far as my public shit on there, just for a drunk night, just for talking some shit. 0.99

02:04:51.000 I'm on TMZ. I lost some corporate gig because of that, because they just saw it, and they're like, oh, you got arrested? 0.99

02:04:58.000 They just wiped the gig.

02:05:00.000 It was a decent-paying, you know, It was a hockey Hannibal type of gig.

02:05:10.000 In that range.

02:05:12.000 So it was a rough little time, man, after that.

02:05:18.000 So to finally kind of...

02:05:21.000 Get the piece out, get the special out.

02:05:24.000 Even just putting it out Friday was like a huge weight like none of the other specials because the other special was kind of done on a two-year clock, too.

02:05:34.000 And this one filmed it twice, out of pocket.

02:05:38.000 It has so many other elements that made it.

02:05:41.000 Really heavy.

02:05:42.000 And that's...

02:05:43.000 And you had to close with that, too.

02:05:44.000 Yeah, had to close with it.

02:05:45.000 And that's why I threw a COVID party.

02:05:47.000 I'm sorry.

02:05:48.000 But you got away with it.

02:05:49.000 I'm sorry about the party.

02:05:51.000 I just needed to blow off some steam! 0.99

02:05:54.000 Those mushrooms will let you know if you fucked up, too. 1.00

02:05:57.000 Oh, man. 1.00

02:05:58.000 They will let you know.

02:05:59.000 They'll drag you. 0.98

02:06:01.000 They will drag you to the darkest part of your imagination.

02:06:03.000 Yeah, man.

02:06:04.000 It was like, oh, set and setting is super important.

02:06:09.000 Everything.

02:06:11.000 That's why they say silent darkness is the way to go.

02:06:14.000 At a COVID party.

02:06:17.000 High on mushrooms thinking you killed everybody.

02:06:19.000 Thinking you're going to go to some funerals.

02:06:21.000 You're looking at people vibing out and you're like, what did I do?

02:06:24.000 This is all me.

02:06:26.000 You're like, this is me.

02:06:26.000 I did this.

02:06:29.000 Man, I don't envy cops.

02:06:30.000 I don't, I would not want that job.

02:06:33.000 It is a very hard job. 0.99

02:06:34.000 But I, you know, I'm an optimistic person, generally, but I don't know what's gonna come out on the other end of all this shit. 0.99

02:06:44.000 This is, get into those kill cliffs, huh? 0.99

02:06:46.000 Yeah, man.

02:06:47.000 It's legit.

02:06:48.000 I don't know what's gonna come out on the other end of this.

02:06:52.000 Bring Sam Harris now!

02:06:53.000 Oh, that's Sam Harris!

02:06:55.000 Oh, that's right!

02:06:59.000 I forgot about that.

02:07:01.000 For people who don't know, Hannibal and I did a podcast where we got hammered.

02:07:04.000 And then I had a podcast afterwards with Sam Harris and I think it was Josh Zeps, who's an Australian TV presenter now.

02:07:13.000 And you guys got into it about...

02:07:16.000 He was pulling up stats on police brutality or violence with cops.

02:07:22.000 And I was like faded. 0.99

02:07:25.000 Shut up. 0.98

02:07:26.000 I was not in a... 0.99

02:07:28.000 I should have left after that podcast, but I just stuck around.

02:07:34.000 Oh, we were drunk.

02:07:36.000 We were drunk.

02:07:37.000 I did call him a human PowerPoint presentation.

02:07:40.000 There was something.

02:07:41.000 I think it was just being so faded, and then that tone.

02:07:44.000 He was like, what are you talking about?

02:07:53.000 Yeah.

02:07:53.000 Well, it's the touchiest subject in all of history.

02:07:57.000 Cops killing people.

02:07:58.000 That's the touchiest subject.

02:08:00.000 You get killed by the people that are supposed to protect you, especially unjustly.

02:08:03.000 I mean, nothing else would have made these protests the way they went down like that George Floyd video, to see it so obvious.

02:08:16.000 Where there's no ifs, ands, or buts.

02:08:18.000 That is what it is.

02:08:19.000 It is a cop who's supposed to protect someone.

02:08:21.000 He's killing somebody in front of everybody.

02:08:23.000 And it's being filmed by a 17-year-old girl.

02:08:27.000 It's heavy, man.

02:08:28.000 It doesn't get any heavier.

02:08:29.000 And that's why the reaction was the way it is.

02:08:31.000 It was like a powder keg.

02:08:33.000 It's like everything was building up.

02:08:34.000 There had always been that.

02:08:36.000 There had always been this insane tension.

02:08:40.000 And then you see that.

02:08:41.000 And it's just like, wah!

02:08:43.000 And we're still dealing with it.

02:08:44.000 Still dealing with it.

02:08:46.000 Months later.

02:08:47.000 It's super wild.

02:08:53.000 When I was driving to Arizona, I stopped at a gas station to do somebody's Zoom interview thing.

02:09:06.000 I just kind of...

02:09:08.000 I set up the tripod and my phone on the hood of the car.

02:09:13.000 And then I was hyped.

02:09:15.000 I was hyped to not be sitting in my computer.

02:09:19.000 And I was just, you know, like, look at me, I'm outside.

02:09:23.000 But because I had been off of social media, I didn't even know the Joyce Floyd thing had happened until I was driving later, and my friend told me, and she was like, Joyce Floyd in the Minneapolis.

02:09:36.000 And so this had been, I think it had been 48 hours or something at this point, but I was on some interview like, Hey, what's going on?

02:09:46.000 I'm outside. 0.98

02:09:50.000 Just completely oblivious and just happy to be traveling and shit and not knowing what I was like maybe 45 minutes away from knowing what was happening in the world and shit. 0.98

02:10:03.000 So they told you? 0.99

02:10:04.000 They didn't tell me, but they probably were wondering why I was acting so loosey-goosey.

02:10:10.000 Did you have that jacket on?

02:10:11.000 I did not have this.

02:10:12.000 What did I have on?

02:10:13.000 I don't know.

02:10:14.000 I had some dope...

02:10:15.000 I had some shades on.

02:10:16.000 It was a real...

02:10:17.000 I was genuinely joyful at just being on the road and having that feeling again.

02:10:23.000 And then I found out an hour later, and it was like, oh, I probably look kind of crazy right there.

02:10:31.000 A little jaded.

02:10:33.000 Yeah, man.

02:10:34.000 Yeah, but it's...

02:10:37.000 I mean, how often are you off social media like that?

02:10:41.000 Is that a normal thing for you?

02:10:42.000 It was...

02:10:45.000 Well, it was the beginning of COVID. I had to kind of...

02:10:47.000 That's when I just got into that zone and I was like, turn this off.

02:10:52.000 If you want to get some stuff up, just send it to your folks.

02:10:56.000 Have them post it up.

02:10:57.000 And then it's better when I get in that zone anyway because it's more like operating like a quarterback than it is just being in it.

02:11:05.000 You know, just like, hey, let's do this, this day, this day, this day, this day.

02:11:08.000 And then I'm able to just...

02:11:10.000 Do whatever I want, you know?

02:11:11.000 Right.

02:11:11.000 Just finish writing up the treatment for who said that versus, like, looking at tweets, you know what I mean?

02:11:17.000 You're serious about having said that?

02:11:24.000 It's the longest running joke ever.

02:11:27.000 Callbacks, man.

02:11:29.000 It's all about callbacks.

02:11:31.000 It's just a three-hour podcast.

02:11:33.000 You got to keep it weaving it in.

02:11:34.000 I get it.

02:11:35.000 I get it.

02:11:38.000 So you did the interview, and then you found out afterwards.

02:11:42.000 Found out afterwards.

02:11:42.000 Did you want to call them back and go, hey, I didn't know?

02:11:45.000 No, I didn't.

02:11:47.000 And then I get to my sister's house, and it's on the TV, and it's heavy, man.

02:11:54.000 It's super heavy.

02:11:58.000 But it's really just the training and the...

02:12:05.000 It just needs to be a high level of training.

02:12:08.000 I talked to Jocko Willink.

02:12:10.000 He's a former Navy SEAL and a commander, and he said that they should be training 20% of their time.

02:12:16.000 He said that they train for a very short amount of time in the beginning of their career, and then they don't train anymore.

02:12:21.000 He said they should be training 20% of their time on the force.

02:12:24.000 While they're there, they should be going over how to defuse situations.

02:12:27.000 They should be going over how to keep people safe.

02:12:30.000 What's your objective?

02:12:31.000 What are you trying to do?

02:12:32.000 When you come up to a drive, if you're emotional, if your partner's emotional, you got to see that and step in.

02:12:37.000 You defuse that situation and you step in and go, hey Mike, let me talk to this guy.

02:12:42.000 And then you come in and you be a nice guy.

02:12:44.000 Figure out a way.

02:12:45.000 If you see someone abusing someone, you gotta step in, step in, relieve him, and you take over.

02:12:50.000 And figure out a way to do it where the guy doesn't have to lose face, but you can keep everybody safe. 0.98

02:12:55.000 And figure out a way where they can train these people where shit like this doesn't happen. 0.99

02:13:02.000 We're in this time where these fucking people, they go to work every day wondering if they're gonna die. 1.00

02:13:08.000 They go to work every day pulling people over. 1.00

02:13:10.000 They're all freaked out.

02:13:11.000 You never know what day's gonna be your last. 0.99

02:13:13.000 If you're a cop, you're seeing people get shot every fucking day. 0.99

02:13:17.000 I mean, I can't imagine. 0.99

02:13:20.000 To look at it from their perspective, to look at it with the rosiest of rose-colored glasses, I can't imagine.

02:13:27.000 That you're walking up on suicide victims, murder victims, you're walking up on robbery victims, you're constantly around violence and death and crime.

02:13:41.000 They're all PTSD'd out.

02:13:43.000 That's what I think.

02:13:43.000 I think most cops have extreme PTSD. And some of them can handle it.

02:13:48.000 Some of them can just handle it.

02:13:49.000 And there's a lot of them that are good people. 0.99

02:13:52.000 And then there's a lot of them that should have never been fucking cops in the first place. 0.97

02:13:54.000 There should have been a more stringent process. 0.98

02:13:56.000 That guy in the George Floyd case, you know they got into it when they worked together.

02:14:01.000 Yeah, because the cop was abusive.

02:14:04.000 He was abusive to customers.

02:14:05.000 And George Floyd and him got into it because of that.

02:14:08.000 So there was a personal element to it.

02:14:11.000 I don't want that job.

02:14:12.000 You don't want that job. 1.00

02:14:13.000 I mean, fuck that job. 1.00

02:14:15.000 But the people that get that job, we've got to figure out a way to make it Safer for them, better for them, better training, and safer for everybody else. 1.00

02:14:24.000 And I don't know what the fucking solution is. 0.97

02:14:26.000 No one does. 0.99

02:14:27.000 That's why we're all in chaos.

02:14:28.000 And the people running around, defund the police, like, whew.

02:14:32.000 Okay, do you know what that's like?

02:14:34.000 That's like New York City right now, where people are getting shot left and right.

02:14:36.000 Did you see, like, the stats in New York City?

02:14:39.000 It's crazy.

02:14:40.000 Really? 1.00

02:14:40.000 It's fucking crazy. 1.00

02:14:42.000 It was on the cover of the New York Post. 1.00

02:14:47.000 See if you can find that about the amount of shootings.

02:14:50.000 41 people shot over the weekend, 9 killed.

02:14:53.000 Something crazy like that.

02:14:55.000 When they said they've never had it like this.

02:14:57.000 This is like since the 80s is the worst gun violence weekend they've had in the history of the police force. 1.00

02:15:04.000 Damn! 1.00

02:15:05.000 Why do you... 1.00

02:15:06.000 But the police...

02:15:06.000 Because they all hate the mayor.

02:15:07.000 The mayor wants the cops to stand down.

02:15:10.000 Cops are quitting left and right.

02:15:12.000 The cops don't feel like they're supported by the mayor.

02:15:14.000 The mayor is like this super progressive, you know, really liberal guy who...

02:15:22.000 The police officers have no respect for them.

02:15:24.000 And they're quitting.

02:15:25.000 They don't want to do this.

02:15:26.000 And then you've got people that don't think that they're in a place that's being policed.

02:15:29.000 And so they're just going wild.

02:15:31.000 They don't think the cops are coming.

02:15:33.000 They don't think anybody's going to stop them.

02:15:35.000 And then, you know, obviously with the COVID and the lockdown, how many people are out of work?

02:15:40.000 How many people are broke? 0.69

02:15:41.000 How many people are just on tilt, just starving and not knowing where their fucking money's coming from and super tense? 1.00

02:15:51.000 Damn, man. 1.00

02:15:52.000 So you can't defund the police. 1.00

02:15:54.000 We don't want to live in Mad Max.

02:15:56.000 We don't want to live in Mad Max.

02:15:58.000 We want more funding for the police.

02:16:00.000 Better education for the police. 0.99

02:16:02.000 And we all gotta come to some sort of a fucking agreement. 0.99

02:16:04.000 Cops are us. 1.00

02:16:06.000 Mandatory meditation for the police.

02:16:09.000 Mushrooms.

02:16:10.000 Mushrooms.

02:16:11.000 Mushrooms for all cops.

02:16:12.000 They have to...

02:16:14.000 Yeah.

02:16:15.000 Yeah.

02:16:15.000 The cops gotta go to Joshua Tree.

02:16:18.000 Mandatory mushroom training.

02:16:20.000 Yeah.

02:16:21.000 I feel like the mandatory mushrooms could help.

02:16:24.000 Everybody, including politicians.

02:16:27.000 Mandatory mushrooms for politicians. 0.96

02:16:28.000 I want to be in the room with, like, Governor Newsom of California.

02:16:33.000 I want to be in the room when that guy eats five grams. 0.72

02:16:35.000 I want to see how he freaks out.

02:16:38.000 How do you handle it?

02:16:39.000 We should all be able to watch you eat five grams.

02:16:41.000 I want to know who you are.

02:16:43.000 When the devil comes knocking at your door...

02:16:46.000 The floor is lava.

02:16:51.000 Did you find the cover?

02:16:53.000 Well, it said tripled over the week compared to the year before.

02:16:58.000 And that's all it was comparing it to.

02:17:00.000 Well, just the numbers, though.

02:17:01.000 What is that?

02:17:02.000 It was 101 compared to 26. 101 people shot.

02:17:06.000 Yeah.

02:17:07.000 Okay, I was wrong.

02:17:08.000 I thought it was 40. Damn. 1.00

02:17:10.000 101 people shot over a weekend. 1.00

02:17:12.000 That's crazy.

02:17:13.000 That's crazy. 1.00

02:17:15.000 That is fucking crazy. 0.99

02:17:17.000 I mean, for New York, though. 0.99

02:17:19.000 New York City's going to skyrocket as court closures let pistol perps walk free. 1.00

02:17:24.000 Woo! 0.99

02:17:25.000 There's like 1,800 people, I think, that have some sort of charge that haven't been fully charged because the courts are in, you know, lockdown chaos because of the COVID. Chaos!

02:17:35.000 Whoa! 0.71

02:17:35.000 1,000 people have been indicted with a gun possession charge where the cases are open and they are walking around the streets of New York City today. 0.71

02:17:43.000 Wow!

02:17:45.000 There's 800 more that have been charged and not formally indicted yet. 1.00

02:17:49.000 Fuck! 0.99

02:17:51.000 That's just in New York City. 1.00

02:17:53.000 Oh my god, that's madness.

02:17:55.000 2,000 shooters running around New York.

02:17:58.000 Just think of that.

02:18:00.000 You can't defund the police, folks. 0.66

02:18:02.000 All that crazy, progressive, Marxist nonsense of defunding the police. 0.90

02:18:09.000 Stop! 1.00

02:18:09.000 You want to be safe. 1.00

02:18:10.000 You want everybody to be safe.

02:18:11.000 You just want the police to be way better at what they're doing.

02:18:14.000 Way better.

02:18:16.000 And they're gonna need funding for that.

02:18:18.000 Seems counterintuitive, right?

02:18:20.000 Like if cops are abusive, they shouldn't get money. 0.55

02:18:22.000 But that's, it's not going to the cops.

02:18:24.000 It needs to go to education and they need to figure out how to do it better.

02:18:30.000 What am I, a cop educator? 1.00

02:18:31.000 The fuck am I talking about? 1.00

02:18:33.000 You coming to me for cop advice? 1.00

02:18:35.000 You fucked up. 1.00

02:18:38.000 I'm a pothead and a cage fighting commentator. 1.00

02:18:40.000 You coming to me for cop advice?

02:18:44.000 Yeah, man.

02:18:44.000 It's gonna be the fall.

02:18:46.000 That's why I'm trying to get out of here.

02:18:48.000 It's a good move.

02:18:49.000 Get out of here by November.

02:18:50.000 No matter who wins in November, it's gonna be madness.

02:18:52.000 Yeah, I wanna just...

02:18:54.000 I wanna...

02:18:55.000 I don't wanna hear about no more, you know, versions of...

02:19:01.000 This.

02:19:02.000 We're not calling it urban music anymore.

02:19:06.000 Aunt Jemima.

02:19:14.000 Pancakes are racist.

02:19:15.000 Everything.

02:19:18.000 It's just the changes.

02:19:20.000 I don't know.

02:19:21.000 It's the grandstanding part of it.

02:19:24.000 And it's tough to gauge.

02:19:26.000 I mean, most of it is just...

02:19:28.000 You know, they want their company to do well.

02:19:30.000 So they look at, oh, let's do it.

02:19:34.000 And so on.

02:19:35.000 And then the politicians are playing off it both ways.

02:19:38.000 You have some politicians that are playing off it.

02:19:40.000 They're supporting that.

02:19:41.000 And then some politicians like Trump, he's upset that the Washington Redskins and the Cleveland Indians are going to change their name now.

02:19:48.000 What are the Redskins?

02:19:49.000 The Redskins finally, they finally broke?

02:19:52.000 It looks like they're breaking.

02:19:54.000 They're talking about break-in, but what are they going to call themselves?

02:19:57.000 Like, what's offensive?

02:19:59.000 The Trump faces?

02:20:01.000 Washington Trump faces.

02:20:04.000 Yeah.

02:20:06.000 We're the Washington spray tans.

02:20:08.000 Yeah.

02:20:09.000 We're not the Redskins.

02:20:11.000 What are they going to call themselves?

02:20:12.000 Do we know?

02:20:13.000 There's a bunch of names, but a lot of the professional soccer teams, or football and Premier League, they could just be the Washington FC football club, literally, and just be the city team.

02:20:26.000 Do you know how valuable those Redskins jerseys are going to be?

02:20:29.000 They'll make new ones without Redskins on it now. 0.59

02:20:34.000 I know, but the old Redskins jerseys are going to be so valuable.

02:20:37.000 Yeah, well, they're not selling them anywhere now.

02:20:38.000 Amazon took them all off.

02:20:40.000 Nike took it all off.

02:20:41.000 Really?

02:20:42.000 Within the last couple of weeks?

02:20:43.000 Within the last couple of days.

02:20:45.000 Somebody's about to start making some on Etsy.

02:20:49.000 What I thought was crazy was NASCAR just removed the Confederate flag.

02:20:55.000 They just did it!

02:20:57.000 Just recently.

02:20:59.000 Last week?

02:21:01.000 Yeah, it was the Bubba Wallace thing.

02:21:03.000 Just recently.

02:21:05.000 I didn't think it was still there.

02:21:08.000 Hey, while everybody's looking, let us do this real quick.

02:21:13.000 Let's get this up out of here.

02:21:15.000 That's the last round.

02:21:18.000 You know, it's interesting, man.

02:21:20.000 It's weird where this is all gonna end.

02:21:22.000 Because there's gonna be an adjustment, right?

02:21:24.000 There's an overcorrection, and then there's an adjustment, and things come forward and back, and, you know, we want to get to a place where people are just cool with each other.

02:21:33.000 And we're not there.

02:21:34.000 And I'll be on my farm in Ghana, you know, directing films, and just living off my who-said-that-money.

02:21:48.000 Doing my gambling podcast.

02:21:50.000 Do they have stand-up in Ghana?

02:21:51.000 Have you checked on that?

02:21:52.000 They do.

02:21:53.000 Yeah, they do.

02:21:54.000 And then in Nigeria, I did some stand-up in Nigeria.

02:21:59.000 Did you really?

02:22:00.000 There's a comedian, Basket Mouth, that hosted us over there and did some shows with him.

02:22:07.000 Yeah, a lot of people perform in Pigeon English.

02:22:11.000 Ah. 0.94

02:22:14.000 So, one of the shows I went to, I didn't know what the fuck was being said, but this guy's a solid performer. 0.98

02:22:22.000 His delivery sounds airtight, but I'm getting nothing. 0.95

02:22:27.000 And so you went and did your stand-up, but did they not understand you?

02:22:31.000 No, they understand English, but people perform in Pigeon.

02:22:36.000 Oh, so they preferred you to perform in Pigeon, and when you were just doing it in regular English, it didn't work with them?

02:22:42.000 No, it worked.

02:22:43.000 It's just if I performed in Pigeon, that would have went well.

02:22:47.000 But I did a set—it's just one of those things, too, where, you know, they want to— Well, I don't know what they wanted, but when you talk about outsider perspective on stuff, then they, you know, oh, okay.

02:22:59.000 He's talking about, oh, yeah, he dealt with our traffic.

02:23:01.000 He dealt with this.

02:23:03.000 He saw this.

02:23:04.000 You know, just hearing an American come in and speak on Lagos, which was...

02:23:10.000 It's bonkers.

02:23:11.000 It took four hours to get from the airport to the hotel.

02:23:15.000 The traffic in Lagos is insane.

02:23:21.000 Is it like one of those places where people don't pay attention to lights?

02:23:25.000 Lights. 0.99

02:23:26.000 I mean, the traffic's so crazy on the highway that people sell stuff on the highway, like on a fucking six-laner. 0.98

02:23:36.000 It's people walking, selling snacks. 0.96

02:23:38.000 I think I bought banana chips or something, just a snack on. 1.00

02:23:43.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

02:23:45.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:23:46.000 That's real?

02:23:47.000 Lagos traffic is... 1.00

02:23:48.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

02:23:51.000 Bonkers. 1.00

02:23:52.000 It's like if New York only had the BQE and that's it.

02:23:57.000 That's kind of what...

02:23:58.000 Cars are parked sideways.

02:24:00.000 On the highway.

02:24:01.000 Yeah.

02:24:02.000 Yeah.

02:24:03.000 They just gave up.

02:24:03.000 They have tents.

02:24:04.000 Look at that.

02:24:05.000 They have umbrellas.

02:24:06.000 It's an existential level of traffic.

02:24:10.000 Well, I guess this is it.

02:24:11.000 I'm here now.

02:24:13.000 Four hours.

02:24:13.000 Four hours from airport to hotel.

02:24:18.000 And how far are you going?

02:24:20.000 Probably no traffic.

02:24:22.000 It's 30, 40 minutes.

02:24:27.000 It was, yeah. 0.99

02:24:29.000 That is fucking insane. 0.99

02:24:31.000 These images. 0.99

02:24:32.000 Jamie, what are you Googling so people can Google along with you?

02:24:36.000 Legos Nigeria traffic.

02:24:39.000 Folks, this is insane.

02:24:41.000 There's people standing in the middle of the highway with umbrellas.

02:24:45.000 And not a few people.

02:24:47.000 A lot of people.

02:24:48.000 Yeah, it's...

02:24:50.000 Oh my god, this is crazy.

02:24:53.000 Oh my god, it's everywhere.

02:24:57.000 Yeah, and you know, some stuff you take for granted over here, the emission standards, you just accept them. 0.95

02:25:08.000 But I remember we were behind a semi-truck, and it let off some shit into the sky.

02:25:17.000 That was so smoky and terrible. 1.00

02:25:20.000 Look at this shit. 1.00

02:25:21.000 This is crazy. 1.00

02:25:23.000 My friend Babylon said, he said, Captain Planet would have a fit with this shit just because the smoke was so crazy. 0.99

02:25:32.000 This video is, what is this video titled? 1.00

02:25:35.000 That's a slum.

02:25:36.000 My beloved slum.

02:25:36.000 It's a 4K drone video.

02:25:38.000 And this is all water.

02:25:39.000 So these houses are in water.

02:25:42.000 Just barely above the water on sticks. 0.99

02:25:44.000 This is fucking crazy. 0.97

02:25:47.000 Everything's on fire. 0.99

02:25:48.000 Look at that.

02:25:49.000 Oh my god, this is madness.

02:25:54.000 But it's amazing that so many people live there.

02:26:00.000 And then, you know, this is just what they accept.

02:26:03.000 People just get used to a certain way of living.

02:26:06.000 And for them, I mean, it's probably normal life. 1.00

02:26:09.000 For you or for us, we go there and we're like, what the fuck? 1.00

02:26:12.000 But once you're in the mix, the shit is dope. 1.00

02:26:16.000 I had a great time and, you know, going to different spots and hanging out. 0.98

02:26:20.000 What's the food like there?

02:26:21.000 Food is great.

02:26:23.000 It's a lot of spice, some stuff.

02:26:26.000 But I haven't been to Ghana yet, so I'm excited about Ghana.

02:26:32.000 Yeah, Lagos is an intense spot.

02:26:36.000 China has been investing in buying up a lot of...

02:26:42.000 They've been investing all over Africa, kind of building infrastructure everywhere, they say.

02:26:48.000 Yeah, they're doing a lot in the Congo as well.

02:26:50.000 There's a lot of mineral rights and stuff they're taking there, a lot of precious elements and stuff, things that they use for cell phones and all kinds of stuff like that.

02:27:00.000 Yeah.

02:27:02.000 I've never been to any place like that, but I've been to Mexico City, and I was stunned by the air quality there, too.

02:27:08.000 Mexico City is madness, man.

02:27:10.000 I took photos of it, and I put it up on my Instagram.

02:27:12.000 It looks like I'm flying into a fire.

02:27:15.000 See if you can find that.

02:27:17.000 As I was flying in, I was like, this does not even look real.

02:27:20.000 It looks like you could barely see the buildings, because it's just...

02:27:25.000 That's it.

02:27:25.000 Look at that.

02:27:26.000 That's not a fire.

02:27:28.000 That's my phone out the window.

02:27:30.000 Crazy.

02:27:31.000 Wait, are you saying the smoke? 0.57

02:27:33.000 Yeah.

02:27:34.000 All that smoke in the background?

02:27:36.000 Yeah.

02:27:37.000 That's all just emissions.

02:27:38.000 That's not a fire.

02:27:40.000 Like you can see like a mile or two out and that's it.

02:27:43.000 Everything else is just clouds.

02:27:45.000 But it's just, it's just exhausts.

02:27:47.000 Yeah.

02:27:48.000 A lot of the big cities, a lot of the cities in India are the same issue.

02:27:53.000 Bangkok.

02:27:54.000 I remember I had an option to maybe take a 7 or 8 minute Uber or do a 15, 20 minute walk from somewhere to my hotel in Bangkok.

02:28:09.000 I did the walk, but when I got back to the hotel, I felt filthy.

02:28:15.000 I felt the pollution on my skin.

02:28:18.000 It was my worst walk decision ever.

02:28:23.000 Look at that image from Bangkok.

02:28:25.000 Yeah. 0.99

02:28:26.000 Goddamn, that's crazy. 1.00

02:28:28.000 That's like you're in the middle of a raging forest fire. 0.99

02:28:32.000 Like, you can't...

02:28:34.000 Yeah, I remember just getting there, man.

02:28:38.000 I had to take a shower just from that walk.

02:28:43.000 Because you're sweating, man.

02:28:44.000 It was next level.

02:28:47.000 When I was in Mexico City, I got a headache.

02:28:49.000 I was like, I'm getting a headache just from the air.

02:28:53.000 And plus it's that altitude.

02:28:54.000 Mexico's pretty high up there.

02:28:55.000 And that was for the UFC fights, which was really crazy because they're at like 8,000 feet above sea level.

02:29:01.000 So there's thin air and then bad air.

02:29:04.000 It's a combination of both things.

02:29:06.000 Yeah.

02:29:07.000 So they train it in...

02:29:09.000 Yeah.

02:29:10.000 Well, some of them, like Fabrizio Verdum, that was when he beat Cain Velasquez.

02:29:14.000 He went up into the mountains, and he trained actually higher than 8,000 feet above sea level.

02:29:19.000 And he went up there way in advance so he could acclimate.

02:29:22.000 And he was in superb shape because of that.

02:29:25.000 And then Cain, who's usually known for his cardio, actually gassed out.

02:29:30.000 Cain didn't know that he was training like that.

02:29:32.000 Cain couldn't go there early.

02:29:33.000 He came out like two weeks out, and that's not enough.

02:29:36.000 They say you're actually better off going there the day of than going there two weeks of.

02:29:41.000 Two weeks before, because two weeks before, you're not going to acclimate.

02:29:45.000 You're actually just going to be tired. 0.98

02:29:47.000 You know, because your body's still trying to figure out what the fuck is going on. 0.98

02:29:50.000 Why is there no air? 0.98

02:29:53.000 We're lucky, man.

02:29:54.000 We're lucky.

02:29:55.000 China is even worse in some cities, man. 0.98

02:29:58.000 There was one city that I saw in China where there was so much pollution in this video that it looked like the sky, like it was nighttime, and it was during the day, and it was just coal, just burning coal in the air, just particulates.

02:30:11.000 The air was like a dark gray.

02:30:14.000 It was crazy.

02:30:15.000 See if you find that.

02:30:16.000 It's like...

02:30:17.000 It's weird to look at, because you imagine if that was your mom living there, or your daughter, or your family.

02:30:24.000 This is where you have to survive, and you have to look up into that sky every day.

02:30:28.000 It's like a Judge Dredd movie, you know?

02:30:31.000 It's doom.

02:30:32.000 Yeah, man.

02:30:34.000 I struggled just in Denver when I was out of shape, and I had a gig in Denver, and I was drinking a little bit.

02:30:43.000 At one point, I started forgetting jokes.

02:30:46.000 And I hadn't smoked a drink before the show, but I was blanking out.

02:30:52.000 And then in another show, my breath showed up.

02:30:55.000 I had to step off stage to go get my inhaler.

02:30:58.000 I told Tony Turner, DJ, I said, hey man, play something real quick. 0.99

02:31:02.000 He started scrambling and shit. 0.99

02:31:04.000 You have asthma? 0.99

02:31:05.000 Yeah, I have asthma.

02:31:06.000 Oh, wow.

02:31:08.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:31:09.000 That would fucking suck. 0.99

02:31:12.000 Asthma at high altitude? 0.99

02:31:13.000 Yeah, asthma at high altitude and in bad shape is a terrible combination. 1.00

02:31:20.000 Have you found any of that shit from China? 1.00

02:31:24.000 In the middle of looking, I had to pee and I was about to go around and pee. 1.00

02:31:29.000 We can wrap this up.

02:31:30.000 We're almost at 6 o'clock.

02:31:32.000 And that's when we find out.

02:31:35.000 That's when we find out.

02:31:38.000 Do I got the COVID? Do I have it?

02:31:42.000 I don't think so.

02:31:44.000 Who said that?

02:31:44.000 Put it in your bet.

02:31:46.000 Send it to my Venmo.

02:31:49.000 Miami Nights available right now.

02:31:51.000 Miami Nights available on YouTube.

02:31:55.000 Next time when you're coming back from Ghana, I need to know. 1.00

02:31:58.000 I need to know what that was like.

02:31:59.000 We need to talk.

02:32:00.000 Yeah, man.

02:32:00.000 I'm going to write a book.

02:32:03.000 Have you ever thought about writing a book before this?

02:32:07.000 I have.

02:32:08.000 I had a book deal in 2013. What happened?

02:32:14.000 I realized that I would have to write a book.

02:32:22.000 And then I was like, I don't want to do that.

02:32:24.000 It's a lot of work.

02:32:26.000 I have a lot of respect for people who have done it.

02:32:28.000 Because that's a thing.

02:32:29.000 If you're an author, you've really done it.

02:32:32.000 You really wrote a book.

02:32:32.000 That's a big deal.

02:32:34.000 It's just, you know, I think it's...

02:32:37.000 Once you lock in on what you want it to be and then just force yourself to focus. 0.67

02:32:44.000 My friends who've done it though, like Tom Popo or Norton or Whitney, they say it's fucking brutally hard. 0.82

02:32:50.000 It's a lot of work. 0.74

02:32:51.000 It's an extreme amount of effort.

02:32:53.000 Did they work with...

02:32:54.000 I wonder...

02:32:56.000 I guess it's finding a good editor too and just what the angle is.

02:33:02.000 Just write down everything.

02:33:04.000 Just kind of let it fly and then cut it down.

02:33:08.000 I had a book deal once.

02:33:09.000 The editors, it was so annoying.

02:33:13.000 Talking to them they essentially wanted me to take my stand up at one point in time just transcribe it and I was like I'm not doing that and like their idea of what it wanted to be Or what they wanted it to be versus my idea.

02:33:23.000 I just gave them the money back I'm like I'm not doing it. 0.98

02:33:27.000 Damn. 0.98

02:33:27.000 That was like more than ten years ago. 0.98

02:33:30.000 Yeah, that was before the podcast even Damn Yeah, so probably...

02:33:35.000 I'm gonna do it.

02:33:36.000 Actually, we were supposed to do a...

02:33:39.000 People still hit me up about...

02:33:41.000 We talked about doing a gig.

02:33:43.000 Was it Newfoundland or was it somewhere else?

02:33:45.000 Something crazy like that.

02:33:46.000 It might have been Newfoundland.

02:33:47.000 Was it Newfoundland or was it...

02:33:49.000 It wasn't Nova Scotia.

02:33:52.000 Somewhere weird.

02:33:54.000 Somewhere weird, somewhere Canadian.

02:33:55.000 I'm still down for that.

02:33:57.000 All right.

02:33:57.000 Let's do it.

02:33:58.000 When things get normal.

02:33:59.000 2021, when I'm back.

02:34:01.000 Back from Ghana. 0.86

02:34:02.000 Back next fall.

02:34:04.000 The King of Ghana tour.

02:34:07.000 All right.

02:34:08.000 Come see The King of Ghana in Nova Scotia!

02:34:11.000 Well, thank you, sir.

02:34:12.000 Always a pleasure, brother.

02:34:13.000 Thank you, man.

02:34:14.000 And your YouTube special is available right now.

02:34:16.000 Anybody can check it out.

02:34:17.000 And The King of Ghana will be released in December of 2021. Good night, everybody.

02:34:28.000 Stay tuned for Who Said That?

02:34:30.000 Who Said That?

02:34:32.000 Episode 200.

The Joe Rogan Experience - July 09, 2020

Joe Rogan Experience #1505 - Hannibal Buress

Episode Stats

Summary

Transcript