The Joe Rogan Experience - January 30, 2021


Joe Rogan Experience #1604 - Jamar Neighbors

Topics
Tony Hanks backyard shows in apartments shows in parking lot wave Roast Battle wave at comedy store Chicago Ridge hand gypsy cab driver murders delivery vs. restaurant bird scooters guns and regulations alpha brain instants vitamins greasing the groove bar stars stand-up comedy clown school clown school assignment clown assignment poetry reading normal people being penalized Facebook manipulation and stock market tapping cart Jamar Neighbors
Hosted by
Joe Rogan
Guests
Jamar Neighbors
Mentioned
Jamar Malachi Tony Hinchcliffe Jamie Mitzi Bobby Brown Dave Chappelle Austin Charlie Murphy Jeremiah Dennis Rodman Doc Martens Rita Robert De Niro Dino Stampinopoulos Donald Trump Jeff Ross Craig Joker Sagar Dude and 124 more
Joe Rogan Experience #1603 - Brendan Schaub Joe Rogan Experience #1605 - Mark Smith

Episode Stats


Length

2 hours and 46 minutes

Words per minute

189.21

Word count

31,554

Sentence count

4,077

Harmful content

Misogyny

119

sentences flagged

Toxicity

1,269

sentences flagged

Hate speech

78

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode of the Joe Rogan Experience, I sit down with my brother Salud and talk about his time at The Comedy Store. We talk about what it was like to be a comedian at the Comedy Store, and how he got passed over for a job at a sketch comedy club. We also talk about how he was able to get his first job at the comedy club, and what it took for him to get the job he had been dreaming of for a long time. I hope you enjoy this episode, it's a must listen. Joe Rogans Experience is a podcast about comedy and stand-up comedy in general. Please don't forget to SUBSCRIBE to stay up to date with the latest episodes of the show and stay connected with us on social media! You can also support the show by becoming a patron patron by using the patron code: JOGANEXPERIENCY at checkout and get 10% off the first month with code JOEROGANEVERYTHING at checkout. Thank you so much for supporting the show, it means the world to me and I can't wait to do it again! - Thank you. - Salud, my brother! xoxo - "Joe Rogan Show" - "The Joes Experience" - "The Comedy Store" - by: Salud , & Showing you guys some love and support us in the future episodes of JOE ROGAN EXPERIENCE - "the Joes Podcast . Joes - "Joes Experience Podcast, and "the Comedy Store Podcast" - Joes podcast, "the comedy store" - the podcast. , "the place where it's all about Joes and his life, the place where he does it all, Joes & I do it all! , Joes' Experience . . , and much more! - "joerogans Experience" we hope you like it! .Joes and I talk about the Joes is a little bit more... with his life and his journey through comedy and his stand up podcast, and we talk about it all. Joes + I hope he has a lot of other stuff! - I hope that you enjoy it! - Jos and I have a great day! (joe Rogans podcast show

Transcript

Transcripts from "The Joe Rogan Experience" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:03.000 The Joe Rogan Experience.
00:00:14.000 Salud, my brother.
00:00:16.000 Yes, sir.
00:00:16.000 So good to see you.
00:00:17.000 Man, you too, bro.
00:00:19.000 It brings me back to the comedy store.
00:00:24.000 One day I'm going to be looking back on those days and just going, what a lucky time we had there.
00:00:30.000 Yeah.
00:00:31.000 We were so lucky.
00:00:32.000 So lucky to be in that spot at that time and that moment in history.
00:00:36.000 Yeah.
00:00:37.000 Dude, I, um, some guy wanted me to write something about, like, a haunted comedy club.
00:00:45.000 So, like, one of the last days that I was out there before I came out here.
00:00:48.000 So I walked all the way down the street, and then I walked all the way to the, um, to the comedy store.
00:00:54.000 It's closed, it's shut down, and it's abandoned.
00:00:56.000 That is weird.
00:00:57.000 It is! 0.98
00:00:58.000 And I was just looking at, I was just looking at the whole place, taking it in, and I was just like, damn. 0.98
00:01:05.000 I was like... 0.97
00:01:09.000 I just walked off. 1.00
00:01:11.000 I looked at my name, and I was up there like, damn, man, I worked so hard to get that shit on there. 0.99
00:01:17.000 And I just walked off. 0.99
00:01:18.000 I took nothing back to go right about. 0.98
00:01:22.000 And I was just like, damn, I worked so hard to get that. 0.98
00:01:24.000 All right. 0.98
00:01:26.000 Yeah, getting your name up on the wall of that place is like, I mean, for a comedian, that's the stamp.
00:01:31.000 Hell yeah.
00:01:32.000 You got the stamp.
00:01:33.000 Hell yeah.
00:01:33.000 And they wouldn't pass me for the longest, dude.
00:01:37.000 How long?
00:01:39.000 Oh man, so I started going there at 19. When you're 19 years old?
00:01:46.000 Yeah, I've been doing comedy for like 17 years.
00:01:48.000 What year was it when you got passed?
00:01:52.000 Probably like 2014 maybe.
00:02:01.000 So that was like right when I was coming back.
00:02:03.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:02:05.000 And they would never pass.
00:02:07.000 I remember doing a showcase in front of Mitzi.
00:02:11.000 They did a showcase in front of Mitzi.
00:02:12.000 This is when Mitzi came in. 1.00
00:02:14.000 She was all like, you know, much respect, like the crap. 0.99
00:02:17.000 And they sat her in the back. 0.99
00:02:20.000 Everybody was like, oh my god, it's Mitzi, oh my god, it's Mitzi, oh my god, it's Mitzi.
00:02:23.000 We all went up and we all did our sets.
00:02:25.000 Like, it was me, it was Gerard, it was Angela Bowers, it was Josh, it was like all of us. 0.98
00:02:30.000 And then, so we all go up and do our sets and shit. 0.97
00:02:32.000 Mind you, like, this is an open mic. 0.98
00:02:34.000 So, I go up.
00:02:37.000 And the first joke I said, I was like, yeah man! 1.00
00:02:42.000 I was like, Michael Jackson can fuck anybody he want to! 0.99
00:02:46.000 You know what I'm saying? 1.00
00:02:48.000 You know, before everybody was doing that type of joke, I was really like, Michael Jackson can do whatever the fuck he want to do! 0.98
00:02:56.000 And then Mitzi gets up and walks out. 0.98
00:03:01.000 I thought that my friend Angela walked her because he went up after me.
00:03:09.000 And then the next day, remember Tommy? 0.99
00:03:12.000 The next day, Tommy was at the like, what in the fuck did you think you were doing? 0.96
00:03:17.000 And I was like, me? 0.98
00:03:18.000 I was like, I was doing my stand-up. 1.00
00:03:22.000 I was like, I'll rock that shit. 0.99
00:03:23.000 And I was like, it was only four people in? 1.00
00:03:24.000 He was like, you went dirty, bro.
00:03:26.000 It was only six o'clock. 1.00
00:03:28.000 Mitzi called you a pig. 1.00
00:03:33.000 You went dirty, it was only 6 o'clock. 0.99
00:03:35.000 Look at this an hour where you could tell non-dirty jokes. 0.99
00:03:38.000 It's fucked up because I was like, I talk like this all the time. 0.98
00:03:40.000 I was like, 3 o'clock in the morning? 0.99
00:03:43.000 9 o'clock?
00:03:44.000 No matter.
00:03:44.000 That's hilarious.
00:03:46.000 So I walked Mitzi and that's one of the reasons it took me forever to get past because they didn't trust my ass. 0.99
00:03:53.000 If she didn't like you, she got mad for a long time. 0.99
00:03:56.000 She held a grudge.
00:03:57.000 You had to earn your spot back.
00:03:59.000 You had to hang out there forever.
00:04:01.000 Yeah, so then my friends started getting passed.
00:04:06.000 Willie, Hunter, and Gerard got passed.
00:04:09.000 And I was still in development, like in the belly room.
00:04:11.000 They still passed me to the belly room. 0.90
00:04:13.000 And then so I would work in there and stuff like that.
00:04:16.000 And then... 0.98
00:04:19.000 I would go up, I would start coming back, and I went up and everything like that, and I would kill every fucking time during the open mic and during the friends and family part. 0.99
00:04:31.000 I got frustrated because all my friends were getting passed, and I was like, man, I'm funny as fuck, too. 1.00
00:04:37.000 What the fuck? 0.99
00:04:38.000 So every time after I would kill at the store, I would reach out. 1.00
00:04:43.000 I would look at Tommy in the booth, and I'd be like, yo, Tommy.
00:04:46.000 I'm like, you see what I just did in here?
00:04:48.000 I was like, you passing me this week?
00:04:51.000 And he'd be like, he'd be like, he'd just laugh in the back.
00:04:54.000 And I'd be like, okay.
00:04:55.000 And I was like, I'll be back next week and we'll do it again.
00:04:57.000 Oh, man.
00:04:58.000 When he had power over the store, that was a terrible position.
00:05:02.000 Terrible.
00:05:02.000 To have an insane person in charge of running the greatest comedy club the world's ever known.
00:05:09.000 Yeah, man.
00:05:11.000 But I appreciate...
00:05:13.000 I actually appreciate how hard he made it for me, though.
00:05:16.000 You know what I'm saying?
00:05:17.000 Yeah.
00:05:18.000 Adversity makes you stronger if you do stick it out.
00:05:20.000 But when you're a young comic and your friends are doing well and you're not...
00:05:24.000 Yeah.
00:05:24.000 Like, I remember when I was an open-miker, I was dirty.
00:05:27.000 And the other guys that were clean started to get work as hosts in town.
00:05:32.000 And I could only get, like, road gigs.
00:05:34.000 Yeah.
00:05:34.000 I remember being so jealous.
00:05:36.000 Like, God...
00:05:37.000 I'd go to see them.
00:05:39.000 I'd be hanging out with them.
00:05:41.000 I'd go to see them at a club and they would host in front of like 300 super polite people at a really nice club.
00:05:47.000 Everyone was seated and laughing at everything.
00:05:49.000 I would go to these dirty bars in New Hampshire.
00:05:52.000 I was like, oh my god.
00:05:54.000 I've taken a bad path.
00:05:56.000 My friends would get shows and stuff.
00:06:05.000 It was like Angelo Bowers and all these guys.
00:06:09.000 Those guys came on the scene already knowing who they were.
00:06:14.000 I was still figuring it out and all this stuff.
00:06:20.000 I'm a lot to figure out for myself, too.
00:06:23.000 You know what I'm saying? 0.97
00:06:24.000 So I was like, damn, man, nobody would book me. 1.00
00:06:27.000 I'm like, man, fuck. 0.99
00:06:28.000 So what I would do is I would go on Craigslist and I would book bringer shows, but I would never bring anybody. 0.99
00:06:36.000 And that's how I would get my shows.
00:06:38.000 They'd be like, oh, are you going to bring 15 people?
00:06:40.000 I'm like, yeah, I'm going to bring 15 people.
00:06:41.000 And I show up and I bring nobody, but they would still let me go up.
00:06:45.000 And I was like, all right, well, this is what's going to happen.
00:06:47.000 You're not going to bring anybody, but what you're going to do is you're going to go up there.
00:06:50.000 Explain a bringer show to people because a lot of people don't know what a bringer show is.
00:06:53.000 So a bringer show is like when you're like a younger comic and you want to do shows and stuff, there are promoters who are like, hey, you can do a show here in the belly room, but you have to bring 20 people.
00:07:07.000 Was it that many?
00:07:08.000 Is it 20?
00:07:09.000 Sometimes it'd be 20, sometimes it'd be 15. But the bedroom only seats like 80. Yeah!
00:07:13.000 And some people...
00:07:14.000 What's that, Jamie?
00:07:15.000 When I was doing music coming up, just like this, the place we used to play would make us sell 100 tickets to play.
00:07:22.000 What?!
00:07:22.000 Yeah!
00:07:23.000 And here's what they used to do. 0.99
00:07:27.000 They used to say shit like, listen, He's like, this is comedy. 0.99
00:07:32.000 Every show is a bringer show. 0.99
00:07:34.000 You know what I'm saying?
00:07:34.000 He's like, you're going to have to bring people for the rest of your life.
00:07:37.000 You know what I'm saying? 0.99
00:07:38.000 And I was up there like, nigga, my grandma is not going to come out to every single fucking show. 0.99
00:07:43.000 Like, I don't know 20 people. 0.99
00:07:45.000 That's a crazy number.
00:07:46.000 That's a crazy number.
00:07:47.000 They didn't have that in Boston when I started out.
00:07:50.000 They just had open mic nights, and people either came or they can't.
00:07:53.000 Yeah.
00:07:54.000 See, over there, I haven't done Boston like one time, but I haven't done their scene.
00:08:01.000 What'd you do out there?
00:08:03.000 I did a show.
00:08:05.000 Did you do LaughBoston.club?
00:08:07.000 I think it was an individual.
00:08:09.000 Dependent show that Black Thought was running.
00:08:11.000 No, no, no.
00:08:12.000 That's Philly.
00:08:13.000 No, no.
00:08:13.000 Okay, I've never done Boston.
00:08:15.000 Oh, okay.
00:08:15.000 I was in Philly, Boston.
00:08:16.000 All right, yeah.
00:08:17.000 But I'll... 1.00
00:08:20.000 Fuck, I forgot what the fuck I was going to say. 1.00
00:08:22.000 Bring Your Shows, 20 People... 1.00
00:08:24.000 Oh, yeah, yeah.
00:08:25.000 But out here...
00:08:29.000 Out here, our mics are just a gang of comics and shit like that, but out there, real people would go to you guys as open mics and shit like that. 0.84
00:08:36.000 We would rarely get real people in our little open mics and shit.
00:08:42.000 So you're basically practicing for the friends of other comedians. 0.95
00:08:45.000 Yeah.
00:08:45.000 That's weird.
00:08:46.000 Yeah, and so that was our come up.
00:08:48.000 It stifles growth, I think, a little bit, those bringer shows, because you don't get a real audience.
00:08:53.000 Yeah, you get your grandma, and you bring friends who think that you're funny on the street, but they want to see you on the stage, and they'll be like, yo, be funny now.
00:09:03.000 You know what I'm saying?
00:09:03.000 Now it's a different...
00:09:04.000 Yeah.
00:09:05.000 You know, and you can't keep bringing them.
00:09:07.000 Right.
00:09:08.000 And also, you know you're doing stand-up for your friends.
00:09:11.000 So, like, they're right there.
00:09:12.000 I'm seeing my friends.
00:09:13.000 This is weird. 0.99
00:09:14.000 Yeah, it's like, I could do this shit in the fucking living room, like we always do, but... 1.00
00:09:19.000 It's so fucked up. 1.00
00:09:21.000 What are you doing out here? 0.99
00:09:22.000 So, I'm doing shows all week.
00:09:26.000 I've been doing shows all week.
00:09:27.000 I told myself earlier, I was here from the 28th through the 1st in December.
00:09:33.000 And from the 28th, December 21st to the 1st.
00:09:38.000 And just to get a little taste of Austin.
00:09:40.000 What are you thinking about coming out here?
00:09:41.000 Wink, wink.
00:09:42.000 Wink, wink.
00:09:43.000 Wink, wink.
00:09:43.000 Come on!
00:09:46.000 I'm bringing everybody out here.
00:09:48.000 Let's do it.
00:09:49.000 Joe, you know good and hell well we all following you.
00:09:51.000 You know it.
00:09:53.000 Listen, once I open the club, I'm going to put the bat signal up.
00:09:56.000 Yo, yo. 0.99
00:09:57.000 And then so I said, alright, my birthday was January 25th, you know, and so I said, well, you know, I always think at the beginning of the year, like, what are you going to do for your birthday? 0.82
00:10:07.000 You know, and I'm like, alright, you can either go hang out with your family, you can go fuck some hoes at Jeff Ross' house, Or you could take care of your little career and go to Austin and do shows for a week. 1.00
00:10:22.000 And I was like, all right, well, I've done all except for one. 0.97
00:10:25.000 So I'm going to go to Austin and do shows for a week.
00:10:27.000 And I just booked it and I came out here.
00:10:29.000 Nice.
00:10:30.000 Yeah, man.
00:10:31.000 We've been doing shows at this place in town called Vulcan Gas Company.
00:10:35.000 That's a great little spot.
00:10:36.000 I did that yesterday.
00:10:36.000 Oh, it's nice, right?
00:10:37.000 Yeah, I love it.
00:10:38.000 It's a great spot.
00:10:38.000 A little weird people above you.
00:10:40.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:10:40.000 A little weird.
00:10:41.000 The stage is kind of skinny too.
00:10:43.000 Yeah.
00:10:43.000 But at least it's stand-up in a club.
00:10:46.000 Yeah.
00:10:46.000 Yeah.
00:10:47.000 And then on Mondays, Kill Tony at Anton's.
00:10:50.000 I did it just this past Monday.
00:10:51.000 It was amazing.
00:10:52.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:10:53.000 There's some funny fucking people in this town, man. 1.00
00:10:55.000 Hell yeah. 1.00
00:10:55.000 Really good local comics. 1.00
00:10:57.000 Really good.
00:10:57.000 We laughed hard.
00:10:59.000 And Tony was on fire.
00:11:00.000 Oh my God.
00:11:01.000 Yeah.
00:11:01.000 Tony was killing it.
00:11:02.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:11:03.000 It was good.
00:11:04.000 I love Tony.
00:11:06.000 I think he's such a funny person, but I like his confidence.
00:11:11.000 Oh, yeah. 0.96
00:11:12.000 It's ridiculous. 0.99
00:11:12.000 It's ridiculous. 0.99
00:11:13.000 It doesn't even make any sense. 0.74
00:11:14.000 So he had that confidence when we do the open mic at the improv.
00:11:21.000 When we were little dudes, he'd be like, yeah.
00:11:25.000 That's the Undertaker's championship belt that he gave me.
00:11:28.000 And, of course, I had to give it to Tony.
00:11:31.000 There's no way I couldn't.
00:11:33.000 Tony needed that.
00:11:34.000 Yeah.
00:11:35.000 And him with the Undertaker's belt on, I said, you got to take a shirt off photo.
00:11:40.000 With the Undertaker's belt on.
00:11:42.000 Yo.
00:11:43.000 Look at him.
00:11:44.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:11:45.000 Fucking Tony Henscliffe. 1.00
00:11:47.000 And like... 1.00
00:11:48.000 Best roaster in the fucking game. 1.00
00:11:50.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:11:50.000 That dude. 1.00
00:11:51.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:11:52.000 He's so quick.
00:11:53.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 1.00
00:11:54.000 It's fucking the truth, dude. 0.99
00:11:57.000 But yeah, he had that confidence in the open mic. 0.99
00:11:59.000 And then so people, like when we were coming up, people would be like, damn, how is he even feeling like that? 0.87
00:12:06.000 Like, he Like, how does he even feel like that?
00:12:10.000 Like, we don't even know our next joke and he's just up there like...
00:12:14.000 Super confident.
00:12:15.000 Well, you know, he drove, you know, he bought that Corvette.
00:12:18.000 Yeah.
00:12:18.000 He started calling it Corvette confidence.
00:12:20.000 I've got Corvette confidence.
00:12:24.000 Hey, I'm here for it all, man.
00:12:26.000 There's like an undercurrent of this hardcore savagery about him that I'm just like, I'm here for.
00:12:35.000 That I'm here for.
00:12:36.000 Like, okay, I see you, Tony.
00:12:38.000 A lot of people underestimate him because of his voice and his demeanor.
00:12:43.000 Don't be doing that. 1.00
00:12:44.000 He's a bad motherfucker, Tony Hanks. 1.00
00:12:45.000 He is a bad motherfucker and he's savage with the jokes. 1.00
00:12:49.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:12:49.000 Yeah, I respect the shit out of Kanye. 1.00
00:12:50.000 He'll say shit on, and he writes all the time, too. 1.00
00:12:53.000 He'll say shit on stage where I'm just like, oh no, he didn't just say that. 1.00
00:12:57.000 Yep, yep, yep, yep. 1.00
00:12:59.000 And he knows he can get away with it, because... 1.00
00:13:01.000 It's part of, it's the way he looks, it's part of, I mean, he's just, he's a funny fucker. 1.00
00:13:06.000 And he was one of the first to jump in. 0.99
00:13:08.000 I told him I'm here, I'm like, we got plans.
00:13:10.000 He's like, I'm in.
00:13:11.000 He came out here before there was anything open.
00:13:14.000 After Cap City had closed, he was out here.
00:13:16.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 0.96
00:13:18.000 Oh man, I fucking, yeah, so thinking about moving out here, but I was telling them outside, somebody got shot outside of my Airbnb a day ago. 0.98
00:13:27.000 Out here? 0.99
00:13:28.000 Yeah, in front of my Airbnb in the middle of me about to call an Uber.
00:13:33.000 I wonder what like the numbers are in the country in terms of like when the pandemic started to now, like how much violence has gone up.
00:13:40.000 It's probably going up a lot.
00:13:42.000 A lot.
00:13:43.000 Do you think it's because you can get away with it more because everybody wearing masks?
00:13:49.000 I think there's that.
00:13:50.000 I think there's also...
00:13:52.000 When you have economic instability, when so many people lost their jobs, they don't know where they're going to make money, people get desperate, and then people get angry, they get evicted, they get forced out of their homes, they lose their jobs, they lose their car, their car gets repossessed,
00:14:09.000 and they don't...
00:14:10.000 There's people that are being almost forced into crime.
00:14:13.000 In this time.
00:14:15.000 That haven't been in their whole life.
00:14:17.000 There's people that maybe would be slightly inclined to do something shady, but they got a good job, and they're going to keep on keeping on.
00:14:25.000 But then when that job's gone, and then there's no money coming in, people start plotting and scheming, and it's just natural.
00:14:31.000 They get desperate.
00:14:32.000 It's like that Jim Carrey movie, Fun with Dick and Jane.
00:14:36.000 Where they lost everything.
00:14:38.000 You never saw that one.
00:14:39.000 Yeah.
00:14:39.000 Where they lost everything.
00:14:40.000 So they started going on like a crime spree and all this shit. 0.98
00:14:43.000 Like a Bonnie and Clyde type deal? 0.98
00:14:45.000 Yeah.
00:14:45.000 So what happened is that like, okay, so when COVID hit or whatever, everybody started getting unemployment, right?
00:14:52.000 So you talk about like scheming and all this shit. 0.54
00:14:55.000 So I went over my aunt's house and my big brother was over there and he was up to like, yeah, man. 0.94
00:15:02.000 He was up to like, so what you gonna do?
00:15:04.000 And I was like, Ah, you know, man.
00:15:07.000 I mean, I may draw and do some art and sell that and stuff.
00:15:10.000 He was like, or, and my little brother is in prison, so he's like, or we can get that nigga Chase Social Security number and then type that in and get his unemployment. 0.96
00:15:23.000 And I was like, nigga, I'm on TV. I can't be here. 1.00
00:15:29.000 I do think that that's brilliant. 0.75
00:15:31.000 And if I was another nigga, I... But people getting fucked up for that. 0.99
00:15:37.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:15:37.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:15:38.000 People getting...
00:15:39.000 Well, the other thing that was happening with the unemployment was there was a lot of people that if they went back to work, they'd be risking their life.
00:15:46.000 But if they just said, no, I'm too scared to go back to work, they still get that unemployment.
00:15:50.000 And then you're not working for long periods of time.
00:15:53.000 You start to change the way you look at work.
00:15:55.000 Yeah.
00:15:56.000 You start to change the way you look at things.
00:15:58.000 Yeah.
00:15:59.000 And then you hear about stimulus checks. 0.99
00:16:00.000 Like, where's this fucking stimulus checks? 0.99
00:16:02.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:16:03.000 You start thinking, like, we're just going to start getting checks.
00:16:05.000 That could be a dangerous thing if the government just starts paying everybody.
00:16:08.000 Why?
00:16:09.000 Because I just don't think they have the money for it.
00:16:11.000 Where's it going to come from?
00:16:13.000 Somehow or another, they're going to have to take it from somewhere, or they're going to have to start printing money.
00:16:19.000 Look, for sure, people need money to get back on track.
00:16:24.000 The problem is if...
00:16:25.000 If the government starts doing this on a regular basis and then they keep shutting things down and they keep giving... 0.99
00:16:30.000 This is going to be some George Orwell shit. 1.00
00:16:33.000 It's 1984 shit. 1.00
00:16:34.000 We're going to be fully dependent on the government to keep cities open, to keep towns open. 1.00
00:16:39.000 And then we're going to be compliant to the ridiculous rules. 0.99
00:16:41.000 Like you heard the shit they're doing in LA. We were talking about it before the show today. 0.99
00:16:45.000 That LA, they're going to allow outdoor dining, but you can't have a TV on. 0.98
00:16:51.000 What the fuck does that mean? 0.99
00:16:54.000 Who are you? 1.00
00:16:55.000 Who the fuck are you to tell people they can't have a TV on? 1.00
00:16:58.000 Do they have a... 0.99
00:16:59.000 Jamie, is there an explanation for why?
00:17:02.000 Why does that matter?
00:17:03.000 Because it doesn't matter. 1.00
00:17:04.000 They're fucking criminals. 1.00
00:17:05.000 These fucking people think they can just tell you what to do. 1.00
00:17:08.000 LA County says no TVs for outdoor diners at local restaurants. 1.00
00:17:12.000 What?
00:17:13.000 Why?
00:17:14.000 Yeah, why?
00:17:15.000 Does it say why?
00:17:16.000 Why?
00:17:17.000 This provision is effective until further notice.
00:17:20.000 They don't have to tell you. 0.99
00:17:22.000 They don't have to tell you shit. 1.00
00:17:24.000 These fucking creeps. 1.00
00:17:25.000 I mean... 1.00
00:17:27.000 I mean, it's like I said before, it's like, at least you don't gotta worry about them broadcasting the coronavirus.
00:17:33.000 It says sporting events like we talked about.
00:17:34.000 Yeah.
00:17:35.000 This is what it says.
00:17:36.000 It says the broadcast performing to patrons in an effort to keep restaurants from becoming overcrowded for sporting events, such as the upcoming Super Bowl.
00:17:44.000 First of all, there's no evidence that this virus spreads outside.
00:17:48.000 No.
00:17:48.000 None.
00:17:49.000 Zero.
00:17:49.000 Zilch.
00:17:49.000 You can't find any evidence.
00:17:51.000 There's no studies.
00:17:52.000 If you look at all the...
00:17:53.000 When they have a pie chart of how the virus spreads, it spreads in supermarkets.
00:17:59.000 It spreads a little bit in various indoor businesses.
00:18:04.000 There's a very small percentage you show in restaurants, but it's mostly people working in the kitchen that are catching it.
00:18:09.000 They're in tight quarters working together all the time.
00:18:11.000 There's no evidence that it spreads outside.
00:18:13.000 None.
00:18:14.000 So this idea about them being overcrowded, there's no evidence.
00:18:18.000 Here's the thing, because I remember before LA shut down, I remember Saddle Ranch was packed and stuff, but it was outside, but they were packed.
00:18:28.000 And I was like, that looks unhealthy too.
00:18:32.000 They're outside, but they're still close together.
00:18:35.000 And we couldn't do shows right down the street.
00:18:37.000 And you know why? 0.98
00:18:38.000 It's because they were about to start doing shows again, but then somebody caught the health department on the Comedy Store, and then that shit shut it down. 0.98
00:18:46.000 But why? 0.99
00:18:47.000 Because I think it was like a troll or somebody who didn't fuck with a comedy store like that. 0.98
00:18:54.000 But that's what happened. 0.97
00:18:55.000 But what were they saying?
00:18:56.000 What could they say that could have shut down?
00:18:58.000 They just said that...
00:19:00.000 All I remember is that they said that it was like a health problem and stuff like that.
00:19:05.000 And so they shut it down.
00:19:07.000 Right when we were about...
00:19:08.000 They were going to start letting us perform in the parking lot.
00:19:10.000 Yeah, I remember that.
00:19:11.000 Bring back the best of the comedy store in the parking lot.
00:19:13.000 And yeah, somebody got it shut down.
00:19:17.000 That doesn't make any sense. 0.99
00:19:18.000 That's fucked up. 0.97
00:19:19.000 So did you ever see when we had to perform in the window? 0.99
00:19:22.000 Yeah, I did see that. 1.00
00:19:23.000 Yeah, that shit was... 0.99
00:19:24.000 That didn't make any sense either. 1.00
00:19:25.000 That shit was hard. 1.00
00:19:26.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:19:27.000 It was so hard.
00:19:27.000 No connection.
00:19:28.000 No connection with people.
00:19:29.000 And I tried to beat the window so many times I could never do it.
00:19:32.000 Beat the window.
00:19:34.000 I saw Donnell beat the window.
00:19:35.000 I was like, ah, he beat the window!
00:19:36.000 Donnell can beat the window.
00:19:38.000 Donnell can beat Bulletproof Glass.
00:19:40.000 Like...
00:19:41.000 He could be prison glass.
00:19:43.000 No, he gonna get his.
00:19:44.000 We were doing these shows at Stubbs BBQ in town with Chappelle and Mo Hammer and Michelle Wolf and Donnell.
00:19:54.000 And this last one we did, we did one run with Tony Hinchcliffe and this last run I did with Ron White.
00:19:59.000 And Donnell's been opening up the shows.
00:20:01.000 I mean, my God.
00:20:02.000 He just comes out of there like a bat out of hell.
00:20:06.000 Dude, he's unstoppable.
00:20:08.000 Right out of the gate.
00:20:09.000 So intense.
00:20:10.000 So much energy.
00:20:11.000 Dude, he's unstoppable, what he does, dawg. 1.00
00:20:15.000 I was like, he beat the fucking window. 1.00
00:20:17.000 I ain't seen comments beat the window. 1.00
00:20:18.000 Do you think you can beat the window, Joe?
00:20:20.000 I don't know.
00:20:20.000 You can beat the window.
00:20:21.000 You can beat the window.
00:20:22.000 Maybe.
00:20:23.000 People just be excited that you're here.
00:20:25.000 I don't want to try to beat the window. 1.00
00:20:27.000 Fuck. 1.00
00:20:27.000 Yeah, but Donald doesn't give a fuck when he goes up. 1.00
00:20:30.000 He doesn't give a fuck who he follows. 1.00
00:20:32.000 He doesn't give a fuck. 1.00
00:20:33.000 He just goes out, just pow, pow, pow. 1.00
00:20:35.000 Cuts blazing.
00:20:37.000 It was wild.
00:20:38.000 Yeah, boo. 0.96
00:20:39.000 These outdoor shows are different, too.
00:20:41.000 It's weird doing an outdoor show.
00:20:44.000 The comedy, the laughter is great.
00:20:46.000 It's fun.
00:20:47.000 People are all excited, but it doesn't echo.
00:20:49.000 I never liked outdoor amphitheater shows.
00:20:51.000 No?
00:20:52.000 I've done a few of them, but they're just not as good.
00:20:54.000 Like them festival shows?
00:20:55.000 Yeah, they're not as good.
00:20:56.000 They're not as good. 0.97
00:20:57.000 What you really want to do is the best shit is less than 500 people is really ideal. 0.96
00:21:05.000 The main room is ideal. 0.99
00:21:07.000 Packed main room.
00:21:08.000 Packed OR. Comedy works in Denver.
00:21:12.000 Cap City in Austin when it was open. 1.00
00:21:14.000 That kind of shit. 1.00
00:21:15.000 Low ceiling. 1.00
00:21:16.000 Pow! 1.00
00:21:17.000 The laughter rocks the fucking place. 1.00
00:21:19.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:21:20.000 It's wild.
00:21:22.000 That's what you want.
00:21:23.000 Outdoor shows.
00:21:23.000 We were doing this at an amphitheater off of...
00:21:29.000 Fuck, what is that? 0.99
00:21:30.000 It's off of 3rd Street in Beverly. 1.00
00:21:33.000 I mean, 3rd Street in Beverly.
00:21:34.000 Like Beverly. 0.92
00:21:36.000 What is it?
00:21:36.000 Pan Pacific Park.
00:21:37.000 Mm-hmm.
00:21:41.000 Yes, very much.
00:21:54.000 So it had that vibe.
00:21:56.000 Or at least that was what I tried to bring to it.
00:22:00.000 So they weren't bad.
00:22:02.000 I, for a second, was the only person doing indoor shows.
00:22:06.000 I think Tony told you I was running this show out of my apartment.
00:22:11.000 It was called the apartment show Jammers.
00:22:15.000 Didn't Tony do it?
00:22:16.000 Yeah, he did do it.
00:22:18.000 How many people did you have in there?
00:22:20.000 Yo, man, it was lit. 1.00
00:22:22.000 It was like 20 people in that bitch. 1.00
00:22:24.000 Super spreader, bro. 1.00
00:22:26.000 No testing.
00:22:27.000 Hell no. 1.00
00:22:29.000 I can't afford that goddamn COVID shit, like them damn tests. 1.00
00:22:33.000 I get it. 1.00
00:22:34.000 So I was giving people hand sanitizer and I provided a mask.
00:22:38.000 Because what was happening was I started it last June. 0.97
00:22:45.000 Like right when COVID hit and comics were like going crazy because we didn't have our passion to fuck with or whatever. 0.99
00:22:52.000 And I was like, damn. 0.99
00:22:53.000 And I said, you know what I'm about to do? 1.00
00:22:54.000 I said, fuck it. 1.00
00:22:55.000 I said, I'm about to go buy a stereo. 1.00
00:22:58.000 I'm about to go buy a microphone.
00:22:59.000 And I'm going to start a comedy club in my house.
00:23:03.000 And my sister was up there like, my sister was like, yeah, yeah.
00:23:06.000 She was like, I'll work the door.
00:23:07.000 And I was like, all right, for sure.
00:23:09.000 So how did you get the people in there?
00:23:13.000 Instagram.
00:23:13.000 Really?
00:23:14.000 I put out feelers, so I was like, alright y'all, I'm thinking about throwing an apartment show at my house.
00:23:21.000 How do I get people here?
00:23:23.000 And then people were like, I'll come, I'll come. 0.87
00:23:25.000 People were DMing me and shit like that.
00:23:27.000 And I hit up my comic friends and I was like, y'all trying to do some comedy? 0.56
00:23:30.000 And we did it. 0.99
00:23:32.000 It was like 20 people up in that motherfucker. 0.99
00:23:34.000 Nobody got sick? 1.00
00:23:35.000 No.
00:23:36.000 And that's the thing about the show.
00:23:39.000 That's another thing, is that no one's ever said that they caught anything from the show. 0.99
00:23:45.000 And I got a dirty-ass apartment, Joe. 0.99
00:23:51.000 You know what I'm saying? 0.99
00:23:52.000 And so, man, we did that joint.
00:23:55.000 I did it on Monday for my birthday.
00:23:57.000 I brought it out here, but I did it at a hostel.
00:24:00.000 It's called Native Hostel. 1.00
00:24:01.000 I did it at a hostel, and we packed that motherfucker out, but it ain't the same as a fucking apartment. 1.00
00:24:07.000 Right. 1.00
00:24:07.000 In the apartment and shit. 1.00
00:24:09.000 People was chilling on the bed. 1.00
00:24:10.000 People was chilling in the kitchen.
00:24:12.000 That was like the green room.
00:24:14.000 I brought PBR for everybody and we got it in.
00:24:17.000 That's awesome.
00:24:17.000 People have been doing shows in apartments for a while though.
00:24:20.000 Even before COVID, they were doing it for fun.
00:24:23.000 I know a lot of people were doing backyard shows.
00:24:26.000 I got invited to a few backyard shows and I was like, what are you doing?
00:24:30.000 He's like, I'd like you to perform in my backyard.
00:24:32.000 I was like, what are you talking about, man?
00:24:34.000 You're doing a backyard show?
00:24:36.000 Yeah.
00:24:36.000 But people had, there was a lot of, like, you could see it on Facebook and Instagram, people that had shows in their apartment.
00:24:42.000 Yeah.
00:24:42.000 Like, it was just, because, look, it's hard to get stage time in L.A. There's a lot of clubs, but there's a lot of comics.
00:24:48.000 Yeah.
00:24:48.000 And you gotta get past, and it's a grind.
00:24:52.000 Yeah, dude.
00:24:52.000 It's a grind.
00:24:53.000 And it's like, once you get past...
00:24:56.000 Once you get past the open mic levels, I feel like stage time kind of...
00:25:03.000 You know how many stages you can hit if you were an open miker and stuff?
00:25:08.000 It ain't like that.
00:25:09.000 Once you get past that level, it's like, man, you can probably...
00:25:11.000 In L.A., It's like, man, you could probably hit like three spots.
00:25:14.000 Improv, Laugh Factory, Comedy Store, and that's about it.
00:25:17.000 Maybe Ice House if you want to drive.
00:25:19.000 Yeah.
00:25:20.000 Comedy Magic Club if you're really ambitious.
00:25:22.000 Yo, right.
00:25:23.000 Yeah.
00:25:24.000 Yeah, but if you're an open mic, you could do 30 of them.
00:25:26.000 Dog, I remember doing nine open mics on a Sunday.
00:25:30.000 Mm-hmm.
00:25:31.000 Nine on a Sunday? 1.00
00:25:32.000 I just wanted to see how many I could fucking hit. 0.99
00:25:35.000 And I pulled off nine. 0.99
00:25:38.000 Wow.
00:25:38.000 Yeah.
00:25:39.000 Well, you gotta get in the community, right?
00:25:41.000 And once you're in the community, then people let you know where they're all at.
00:25:44.000 Yeah.
00:25:44.000 Because they're spread out in these weird little bars and comic book stores and weird, strange places that have mics.
00:25:51.000 Where's the weirdest place you perform?
00:25:53.000 What?
00:25:54.000 Well, I did bachelor parties with no microphone.
00:25:57.000 That was rough.
00:25:58.000 That was rough.
00:25:59.000 Just a bunch of drunk dudes.
00:26:01.000 Obviously, they don't have any money. 0.86
00:26:03.000 They would have bought a stripper. 1.00
00:26:05.000 Hired a stripper to come. 1.00
00:26:07.000 And there wasn't no stripper there? 0.99
00:26:08.000 No, just me.
00:26:11.000 Those were the roughest ones.
00:26:13.000 I did a Jack and Jill strip club in Rhode Island.
00:26:16.000 That was the weirdest one, because a Jack and Jill strip club is like, there was a time where they tried to have strip clubs where a man performs and a woman performs and couples would go.
00:26:25.000 Like a man and a female stripper? 0.99
00:26:28.000 Like a man would strip and then a female would strip. 1.00
00:26:31.000 And the couple would sit there and watch both of them.
00:26:34.000 It was so strange.
00:26:59.000 Yeah.
00:26:59.000 There was nothing.
00:27:00.000 It didn't even feel bad.
00:27:01.000 Yeah.
00:27:02.000 I was like, what is this?
00:27:03.000 I mean, I was, you know, young in the game anyway.
00:27:06.000 I was only probably doing comedy a year and a half or so.
00:27:08.000 It was because it was a terrible gig.
00:27:10.000 It was for this dude.
00:27:12.000 Oh, man.
00:27:14.000 I'm trying to remember the guy, the booking agent's name. 0.98
00:27:16.000 But he had a bunch of these weird fucking gigs in Rhode Island. 0.99
00:27:20.000 Uh-huh. 0.99
00:27:20.000 Like, they were all real shady. 0.99
00:27:23.000 Like, strange bars you'd go to.
00:27:25.000 Yeah.
00:27:25.000 You'd always get paid, but they were always very weird.
00:27:28.000 And this one, there was, like I said, like six people in the audience, and the type of people that you would see in an audience that would come to see a guy's strip and a girl's strip were very strange.
00:27:38.000 What would they look like?
00:27:39.000 Just like older people that just didn't have any hope and just sitting there and just looked confused as to why they were even there. 0.99
00:27:47.000 And again, there was only six of them in the whole audience.
00:27:49.000 But there was one dude, there was a pool table in the back, there was one dude playing pool.
00:27:53.000 And I came over to talk to him, and he was just a regular dude from New Jersey. 0.99
00:27:57.000 And he's like, man, what the fuck is this place? 0.96
00:27:59.000 I go, what are you doing here? 0.99
00:28:00.000 And he goes, I'm in town visiting my family. 1.00
00:28:02.000 I had to get out of the fucking house. 0.99
00:28:03.000 And I saw this place, and I came over. 0.99
00:28:05.000 And he was like, what is this?
00:28:07.000 The guy and the girl, both of them, they were not attractive.
00:28:10.000 Yeah.
00:28:10.000 At all.
00:28:11.000 No.
00:28:11.000 They both looked like they'd been drinking and doing drugs their whole life.
00:28:15.000 They looked sad and tired and bad tattoos.
00:28:18.000 And where'd you go up?
00:28:19.000 Where'd you go up?
00:28:20.000 Did you go up in the middle of?
00:28:21.000 The beginning.
00:28:22.000 The beginning.
00:28:22.000 I'd go up in the beginning, and then I'd bring them up.
00:28:24.000 Cold open.
00:28:25.000 Then I'd go up in the middle, in between them, and then I'd bring up the girl, and then I'd go up at the end and wrap up the show.
00:28:31.000 Oh, okay.
00:28:31.000 It was a nightmare.
00:28:33.000 You did crowd work?
00:28:35.000 I tried.
00:28:37.000 First of all, it was terrible.
00:28:37.000 Terrible.
00:28:38.000 I've been doing comedy, like I said, like a year and a half, maybe two years.
00:28:41.000 I don't really remember.
00:28:43.000 But I wasn't good.
00:28:44.000 And then on top of that, these people just were barely awake.
00:28:47.000 It was in Woonsocket, Rhode Island, which is like a very...
00:28:50.000 It's a Portuguese section of Rhode Island.
00:28:53.000 Rhode Island has a lot of Portuguese immigrants, for whatever reason, that came to that area. 0.99
00:28:56.000 So these motherfuckers might not have even spoke that much English. 0.99
00:29:00.000 I don't know. 1.00
00:29:02.000 I'm telling you, dude, I didn't get any response.
00:29:04.000 Yeah.
00:29:05.000 You know?
00:29:05.000 It was like...
00:29:08.000 Silence.
00:29:08.000 Yeah.
00:29:09.000 Fuck. 1.00
00:29:11.000 I remember that one. 1.00
00:29:12.000 But that one didn't even make me feel bad.
00:29:14.000 Yeah.
00:29:14.000 I remember leaving that one just laughing.
00:29:16.000 Like, what in the fuck? 0.99
00:29:18.000 What is that? 1.00
00:29:19.000 Fuck. 1.00
00:29:21.000 Yeah, that's crazy. 1.00
00:29:22.000 Fuck, I can't even remember the weirdest. 1.00
00:29:25.000 They're doing them in back of trucks now. 1.00
00:29:27.000 I know, I saw that.
00:29:28.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:29:28.000 Brad did one of those.
00:29:29.000 Yeah, those shows are actually lit.
00:29:31.000 It's a good stage.
00:29:32.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:29:34.000 You know?
00:29:34.000 Yeah.
00:29:35.000 Pickup truck, flatbed.
00:29:36.000 I mean, it seems like a good stage.
00:29:38.000 Yeah, but that's where comedy is in L.A. right now.
00:29:42.000 Well, Eleanor's doing a show at the Magic Castle.
00:29:45.000 They have shows in the parking lot.
00:29:47.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 1.00
00:29:48.000 Yeah, Tammy Jo runs that shit. 1.00
00:29:51.000 How are they allowed to do that? 1.00
00:29:52.000 In the parking lot?
00:29:53.000 Yeah, if you can't have outdoor shows.
00:29:57.000 Are they just doing it?
00:29:58.000 I don't know.
00:29:59.000 I don't know.
00:30:00.000 I haven't even went to the Magic Castle show.
00:30:05.000 I don't want to blow her up.
00:30:07.000 Maybe they're not still doing it.
00:30:09.000 Eleanor had it on their Instagram.
00:30:12.000 Eleanor Kerrigan in the house.
00:30:16.000 Maybe they're just doing it and waiting for people to shut them down.
00:30:19.000 Oh.
00:30:20.000 Bro, it's bad.
00:30:22.000 LA's bad.
00:30:23.000 Yeah, and I'm like, I don't even know what I'm gonna do when I get, maybe I'll go, maybe I'll audition or something.
00:30:29.000 I don't know.
00:30:30.000 I don't know what to do when I get back there.
00:30:32.000 I think you gotta be in your car still like a drive-in.
00:30:33.000 Oh. 1.00
00:30:34.000 I don't like that shit. 1.00
00:30:36.000 Drive-in stand-up shows? 1.00
00:30:38.000 When people honk when they want to heckle?
00:30:39.000 Come on, man.
00:30:40.000 Don't play with me. 1.00
00:30:40.000 I hate that shit. 1.00
00:30:42.000 But I'll tell you what, Burt Kreischer's got that shit dialed in. 1.00
00:30:45.000 Yeah? 1.00
00:30:45.000 He's got it dialed in. 1.00
00:30:46.000 Yeah, they set up a big stage, and he'll do hundreds.
00:30:49.000 Like, I ask him, how many people were in your crowd?
00:30:51.000 He goes, 700 cars.
00:30:52.000 What?
00:30:53.000 But just in fact, you're doing it by car.
00:30:56.000 Yeah.
00:30:56.000 It seems so bizarre.
00:30:58.000 Would you do some shit like that? 1.00
00:30:59.000 I would do that. 1.00
00:30:59.000 I would do it with Burt. 1.00
00:31:00.000 I would do it with Burt.
00:31:01.000 Yeah.
00:31:02.000 700 cars sounds like a good time.
00:31:05.000 I did an outdoor venue.
00:31:08.000 I went to see a show at an outdoor venue.
00:31:11.000 Burr was in town.
00:31:11.000 What was that place again?
00:31:13.000 The place where Burr was at?
00:31:14.000 It's in Dripping Springs.
00:31:16.000 Is it Waller Creek?
00:31:17.000 I don't believe so.
00:31:18.000 There's a few amphitheaters in different areas.
00:31:20.000 They have like these...
00:31:25.000 We're good to go. 0.86
00:31:41.000 Bill murdered it, man. 0.99
00:31:43.000 Seeing him, seeing real stand-up, like real and current events shit, talking about all the stuff that's going on in the world right now, it was so good. 0.99
00:31:52.000 And he's been on a tear, man. 0.93
00:31:54.000 He's been traveling all over the country, just doing outdoor shows and being careful and wearing masks.
00:32:01.000 He won't even shake your hand, even me.
00:32:03.000 Really?
00:32:03.000 I go, dude, I get tested every day.
00:32:05.000 He's like, I'll give you an elbow.
00:32:07.000 I'll give you an elbow.
00:32:08.000 And then he came in here, we both got tested, then he gave me a hug.
00:32:11.000 Right, that's funny.
00:32:12.000 I try to get him to come to my apartment show.
00:32:15.000 I tried.
00:32:15.000 He wants, you know, he's gotta be safe.
00:32:18.000 He's like, absolutely not.
00:32:19.000 He needs to make the money off of stand-up, because he doesn't, I mean, he makes money off his podcast, you know, but I'm sure he's got a, you know, he's got a large nut.
00:32:27.000 And he was complaining on stage about his wife spending money, so I'm sure that's real, too.
00:32:31.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:32:32.000 Fuck. 1.00
00:32:34.000 There's so many people that didn't have a podcast that all of a sudden their income went away. 0.99
00:32:40.000 And they thought, okay, it'll go away for a month.
00:32:42.000 I'll be fine.
00:32:43.000 And then here we are 11 months later. 0.99
00:32:46.000 Like, what in the fuck is going on? 0.97
00:32:48.000 When can we go back to work? 0.99
00:32:51.000 What is happening?
00:32:53.000 Most people, I knew people that were criticizing other people for going on the road, and now they're on the road.
00:32:58.000 Yeah.
00:32:59.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:32:59.000 Because they realize, oh, we've got to take this shit into our own hands. 1.00
00:33:03.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:33:04.000 My mom was like, oh, my God, you going to Austin?
00:33:11.000 You going to Austin?
00:33:11.000 Why are you traveling?
00:33:13.000 I said, bitch, I got to work. 1.00
00:33:14.000 You going to give me rent money? 1.00
00:33:16.000 Bitch, I got to fucking work. 1.00
00:33:18.000 And then she was like, I guess. 1.00
00:33:20.000 Yeah.
00:33:21.000 Yeah.
00:33:22.000 Well, Joey Diaz got mad at me at first. 0.99
00:33:24.000 Why are you going to fucking Houston, Joe Rogan? 0.98
00:33:26.000 What are you doing, Joe Rogan? 0.99
00:33:27.000 You know, the first time I did the improv.
00:33:30.000 I was like, listen, man, I miss it.
00:33:32.000 I want to do it.
00:33:33.000 He's like, stay home.
00:33:34.000 Stay home.
00:33:34.000 Mind your business.
00:33:36.000 But he's doing stand-up now.
00:33:37.000 Yeah, exactly.
00:33:39.000 After a while, people just can't take it anymore.
00:33:42.000 He's like, you know you need it.
00:33:43.000 Yeah, they can't take it anymore.
00:33:44.000 He's being careful.
00:33:45.000 He lives in Jersey now, for now.
00:33:47.000 I'm going to have him come out here, too.
00:33:48.000 He has to come out here.
00:33:49.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:33:50.000 I miss seeing him, dude.
00:33:52.000 That's the glue.
00:33:53.000 That's the glue that held the wildness together at the store. 0.98
00:33:57.000 He don't give a fuck about nothing. 0.98
00:34:00.000 That's real, too. 0.97
00:34:01.000 And I didn't...
00:34:02.000 Since I wasn't...
00:34:03.000 I wasn't like...
00:34:04.000 I wasn't like familiar with his personality and stuff.
00:34:08.000 So I remember one time...
00:34:10.000 I think you were there.
00:34:10.000 Like I got my...
00:34:11.000 I got my keys stuck in my car in the parking lot.
00:34:14.000 And then people couldn't get out of the comic store parking lot.
00:34:18.000 And he couldn't get out...
00:34:20.000 You think you got out, but like, but whatever.
00:34:23.000 So the next day I saw him at the parking lot. 0.99
00:34:26.000 He was like, hey, jerk off. 1.00
00:34:27.000 He was like, he was up there like, stop getting your fucking keys locked in your car. 1.00
00:34:32.000 He was like, all right, you know, Uncle Joey loves you. 0.99
00:34:34.000 And I was like, I've never even talked to this man in my life.
00:34:37.000 But I love I love how you just I love that.
00:34:39.000 I'm like, I love him.
00:34:40.000 Well, you know, he's got that wild East Coast sense of communication.
00:34:45.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:34:46.000 Insulting you is a sign of love.
00:34:48.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:34:48.000 It's like, have fun.
00:34:49.000 That was one thing that I noticed when I came from New York to L.A. is like, New York comics are constantly shitting on each other. 0.98
00:34:55.000 Yeah.
00:34:56.000 And L.A. comics, at least in the 90s, when I first moved to L.A., they were all trying to get sitcoms, man.
00:35:01.000 They weren't insulting anybody.
00:35:04.000 That's all they were trying to do.
00:35:05.000 They were trying to just make everybody their friend.
00:35:08.000 Out here, I mean, nowadays, it picked back up a little bit in LA, but now they do it under roast battle.
00:35:18.000 You know what I'm saying?
00:35:19.000 Now it's like that. 0.97
00:35:20.000 But just outwardly and shit, people don't like to step on toes because people are still trying to... 0.97
00:35:25.000 They're trying to get ahead. 0.94
00:35:26.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:35:28.000 Well, that's part of the showbiz aspect of Hollywood. 0.90
00:35:32.000 It's like they all wanted to be cast in shows and they wanted to make sure they don't say anything too crazy.
00:35:38.000 I know a lot of comics that didn't want to do certain jokes or certain topics even though they thought it was funny because they were worried that a casting agent wouldn't put them in a show or an executive would see it and they would think they'd be too... 0.98
00:35:50.000 I'm like, God damn it, man. 0.96
00:35:51.000 You're a comic. 0.99
00:35:52.000 First and foremost, you're a comic.
00:35:54.000 I figure...
00:35:55.000 This has always been my strategy.
00:35:57.000 I figure, come out crazy.
00:35:58.000 You know? 0.97
00:35:59.000 Come out crazy and then let them see that. 0.96
00:36:02.000 Then scale it back. 0.94
00:36:05.000 Control it.
00:36:06.000 Yeah, dude. 1.00
00:36:07.000 But come out crazy so they know what the fuck they may be getting... 0.99
00:36:10.000 Well, listen, man. 1.00
00:36:12.000 These fucking people, they're all led by whatever they think is the standard that they have to adhere to. 1.00
00:36:21.000 If you were alone with them, they would call people retards, and they would say crazy shit, and they would laugh at bad jokes. 1.00
00:36:28.000 But when they're together under the guise of being a part of a network, it's like they have a career to protect, and everyone's Worried. 0.99
00:36:38.000 The one thing that's beautiful about live comedy is you add a few drinks.
00:36:43.000 People are smoking weed.
00:36:45.000 The place is dark.
00:36:46.000 The spotlight comes on the comic. 1.00
00:36:48.000 You say wild shit. 1.00
00:36:49.000 Everyone's laughing. 1.00
00:36:50.000 Then you find yourself laughing.
00:36:52.000 It breaks down all these walls and you realize, no, this is just fun.
00:36:55.000 This is not what you really mean.
00:36:58.000 He's just being wild and it's fun to watch.
00:37:01.000 It's fun.
00:37:02.000 I remember a long time ago coming up in a comic, one of the best things I ever heard.
00:37:09.000 Oh, am I in the way?
00:37:10.000 Oh, okay.
00:37:11.000 Jamie's moving me over.
00:37:12.000 I'm trying to get a hand signal.
00:37:13.000 I'm trying to see his eyes. 0.99
00:37:18.000 One of the best things that a comic ever told me, even like earlier in life, was like, yo man, the audience comes to hear and see some crazy shit. 0.99
00:37:30.000 Yeah, well, especially at the store. 0.99
00:37:31.000 Yeah!
00:37:33.000 Yeah.
00:37:33.000 But you gotta establish that.
00:37:35.000 I remember in the improv, that wasn't the case.
00:37:37.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:37:37.000 Like the improv, like the early days, Joey used to go to the improv, and he's like, Joe Rogan, I don't like that fucking place. 0.99
00:37:43.000 There's too many fucking mutts. 1.00
00:37:44.000 Too many white people. 1.00
00:37:45.000 That's what he's saying. 1.00
00:37:47.000 He's like, too many fucking mutts. 1.00
00:37:49.000 I say some shit, they fucking get all, they clutch their pearls. 1.00
00:37:53.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:37:54.000 But eventually, we started doing shows there.
00:37:57.000 Yeah.
00:37:57.000 And so when we started doing shows, like we did these Joe Rogan and Friends shows, then everybody knew.
00:38:02.000 We were getting our people to come down there, and then it was wild again.
00:38:05.000 Then Joey loved it.
00:38:06.000 Dude, I remember getting banned from the improv.
00:38:12.000 I remember getting banned from the improv because we had this thing called...
00:38:16.000 It was me and the guys I was coming up with, and we all had a showcase.
00:38:20.000 It was called maybe Best of the Improv, or New Faces of the Improv, or something like that.
00:38:26.000 All my friends were honored and stuff, and You know, everybody, you know, everybody is kind of like straight edge, kind of like, you know, clean and shit like that.
00:38:34.000 And then I would have to go up last and I was getting frustrated in the back and I was forgetting my jokes. 0.99
00:38:40.000 And so when I, when I forget and I just say, fuck it. 0.99
00:38:44.000 So I went up there. 1.00
00:38:45.000 I think I talked about, um, I think I talked about like, like, you know, like I had a joke about like my grandma, uh, making me, uh, smell her pussy when I got bad grades. 1.00
00:39:01.000 It was so fucking absurd. 0.99
00:39:04.000 It was like, what kind of grades you getting? 0.99
00:39:07.000 It was like, oh, F, come here.
00:39:10.000 Smell this.
00:39:11.000 I was like, no. 0.99
00:39:12.000 That's such a ridiculous joke. 0.65
00:39:14.000 It's such an absurd joke, but at that time, you know Rita from the improv? 0.97
00:39:19.000 Yeah, sure. 0.98
00:39:19.000 She was up there like, so we had to do, oh, and by the way, I ended that set by saying, fuck y'all and goodnight, and I tried I don't know what the fuck came over to me, but I was like, oh, bro, I think that that's just your spirit taking over. 0.98
00:39:34.000 Like, that's just who the fuck... 0.99
00:39:35.000 That's just a preview of who you're gonna be later on as a fucking comic. 1.00
00:39:38.000 Right, right. 0.99
00:39:39.000 So, Rita...
00:39:40.000 How many years in were you? 1.00
00:39:41.000 Shit. 1.00
00:39:42.000 I was like, um... 0.99
00:39:44.000 I was probably 22, so 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22. I was five years in.
00:39:50.000 Oh, okay.
00:39:51.000 But you were only 22. Yeah.
00:39:54.000 And so, um... 1.00
00:39:56.000 And so the next day, Rita, she had everybody, like, she never did this shit. 0.99
00:40:01.000 The next day was the open mic. 0.99
00:40:03.000 She had everybody sitting down, and I kind of come in a little late, and she was just sitting on the stage talking, like, talking to all the comics. 0.99
00:40:11.000 I ain't never seen this shit in my life. 0.96
00:40:12.000 So she was giving people their reviews. 0.99
00:40:16.000 She was like, Gerard, amazing.
00:40:18.000 Angelo, amazing.
00:40:19.000 She was like, oh, you could do this, but you did a great job.
00:40:23.000 And then she was like...
00:40:27.000 What did you think you were doing?
00:40:29.000 And I was like, oh, I was trying to be funny, Rita. 1.00
00:40:33.000 And then she was like, smell your grandmother's pussy! 1.00
00:40:36.000 I wish I was there. 1.00
00:40:38.000 I'd be like, Rita, that shit is hilarious. 1.00
00:40:40.000 Let them grow. 1.00
00:40:42.000 The audience was confused, though, too.
00:40:43.000 I ain't gonna lie.
00:40:44.000 They were like...
00:40:47.000 Listen, you need to bring that joke back.
00:40:49.000 Have you been doing that lately?
00:40:51.000 Hell no, that was like...
00:40:52.000 Oh my god, please, Jamar, bring that back.
00:40:55.000 You can figure out a way to make that work.
00:40:57.000 Oh my god.
00:40:58.000 Today, you can make that work.
00:41:00.000 Yeah, now, but back then...
00:41:02.000 Right, but that's always the case in the beginning.
00:41:05.000 That's what I would call a black belt premise. 0.99
00:41:08.000 It's a complicated premise.
00:41:09.000 It's not like a white belt premise. 0.56
00:41:11.000 A white belt premise is like, oh, you know, it's easy. 1.00
00:41:14.000 Set up punchlines, obvious what you're talking about. 1.00
00:41:16.000 You're saying some wild shit. 1.00
00:41:18.000 The audience has to have trust in you for you to joke about your grandmother's smelly pussy and how you have to smell it if you have bad grades. 1.00
00:41:26.000 That shit looks retarded, dog. 1.00
00:41:28.000 Yeah, but it's making me laugh right now. 1.00
00:41:31.000 And the fuck part about that shit is that, like, if I'm in a joke, like, if I'm in a joke, I don't care at what level of comedy I was ever at, if I'm in it, I'm gonna do the whole fucking thing, whether I'm bombing or not. 0.99
00:41:43.000 Like, the whole act out, like, I'll put the whole story and that shit and everything. 1.00
00:41:47.000 I don't give a fuck if it's quiet at the end. 0.99
00:41:48.000 I'm like, mm. 1.00
00:41:49.000 Well, no one here's grandma's had a stinky pussy before, huh? 1.00
00:41:54.000 No one here's got an F? Okay. 1.00
00:41:57.000 How did you get involved in doing the roast battle shit? 0.97
00:42:01.000 Because when you guys would do, when it was you and Jeremiah and Willie, and you guys would act out, when someone would kill somebody with a roast, you guys would pile onto the stage and act out various scenarios, 0.98
00:42:17.000 and it made the show.
00:42:20.000 It made the show.
00:42:21.000 Thank you.
00:42:22.000 I really appreciate that because people online was eating us up. 1.00
00:42:25.000 They was like, who in the fuck are these idiots? 1.00
00:42:29.000 You can't read those. 1.00
00:42:31.000 But it wasn't about that for us.
00:42:33.000 We were just trying to have fun.
00:42:35.000 So in the beginning stages of the roast battle, and shout out to Jeff for letting us do that.
00:42:41.000 You know what I'm saying?
00:42:42.000 Oh yeah, it's a wild move.
00:42:43.000 Yeah, it is. 0.98
00:42:45.000 But I feel like a show like that, where you're constantly spouting these insults and shit like that, and a lot of them are really fucking dark, you need a palate cleanser. 0.97
00:42:54.000 It don't matter. 0.98
00:42:54.000 That's a good way to put it. 0.98
00:42:56.000 Yeah.
00:42:56.000 That's a very good way to put it.
00:42:57.000 Yeah, so at the beginning, like, when they first start, like, the origins of it and shit, when they first start, like, me, Willie, and Jeremiah, we'd be sitting, like, just watching these motherfuckers, like, just talk shit about each other. 0.98
00:43:07.000 And I naturally have a big laugh and whatever. 0.99
00:43:11.000 It's damn near over-exaggerated and shit. 0.98
00:43:13.000 And then so Jeremiah and we all, like, would start watching it. 1.00
00:43:18.000 Whatever. 1.00
00:43:19.000 And then I would laugh and I would do different shit. 0.99
00:43:21.000 I would start dancing and shit on stage and shit like that or whatever. 0.99
00:43:26.000 And then Jeremiah and them start coming in and all this stuff. 0.99
00:43:28.000 And then so that shit escalated. 0.98
00:43:30.000 So one time, like one week, we were like, hey man, let's go to Goodwill. 0.99
00:43:34.000 And every time somebody says something funny, I was like, we just go up there in these different props and shit, right? 0.83
00:43:43.000 And then so... 0.99
00:43:46.000 And so then it would get like really fucking elaborate. 0.98
00:43:49.000 We would do like costumes and shit like that. 0.99
00:43:51.000 But it all started from just over laughing and just like trying to just fuck around and kind of troll the fucking battlers kind of sort of and the whole thing or whatever. 0.98
00:44:00.000 But that's how it started. 0.99
00:44:01.000 And yeah, man.
00:44:04.000 Did you guys get together and plan out like various little things that could possibly be happening if someone kills somebody?
00:44:11.000 And how did you know when to bring out which one?
00:44:13.000 So, um, okay, so we would get very, uh, so we would go prop shopping. 0.98
00:44:21.000 Some of that shit didn't make sense, but, like, we would go prop shopping and shit, but, um... 0.89
00:44:26.000 Is there a video compilation of, like, the best of the wave? 0.99
00:44:30.000 Yeah, it is.
00:44:31.000 It is.
00:44:31.000 Oh, find that.
00:44:32.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:44:33.000 There should be if there isn't.
00:44:34.000 Yeah, there has to be. 0.98
00:44:35.000 So we would go prop shopping and shit like that, right? 0.97
00:44:39.000 And we would know who was battling or whatever. 0.99
00:44:41.000 And so we were like, well, this person's fat. 0.98
00:44:43.000 This person's a lesbian. 1.00
00:44:44.000 This person's trans or whatever.
00:44:46.000 So they're probably going to say stuff like this.
00:44:48.000 So let's get this rainbow flag.
00:44:50.000 Let's get some gasoline. 0.99
00:44:51.000 So when somebody says something about this gay dude, we're going to burn the rainbow flag. 0.98
00:44:58.000 Did you guys actually burn a flag? 0.98
00:45:00.000 We burned a Confederate flag in Alabama and the whole crowd gave us a standing ovation.
00:45:10.000 Really?
00:45:11.000 Yeah, that was like one of the bits. 1.00
00:45:12.000 Indoors burning a flag is dangerous as fuck. 1.00
00:45:15.000 But that's the dope thing about the wave is that people never ever knew what the fuck we were going to do. 1.00
00:45:19.000 So we would get away with shit like that because of the air of unpredictability. 0.99
00:45:24.000 Right. 0.99
00:45:24.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 0.99
00:45:27.000 So, yeah, man.
00:45:27.000 It's a great name for the group of you, too.
00:45:30.000 The Wave.
00:45:31.000 Because before we did the roast battle, I would be in the OR and...
00:45:39.000 And, um, when somebody would do something funny, I would, I would, I was always an overlaugher anyway, whatever.
00:45:46.000 And, um, so one time somebody did something, I was like, ha ha ha!
00:45:49.000 And I was like, whoa!
00:45:51.000 Whatever, right?
00:45:52.000 And then so, uh, and then so we started doing that, like, in the roast battle, too.
00:45:57.000 You know what I'm saying?
00:45:57.000 I was like, oh man, we should just call ourselves the wave, or whatever, and this and that.
00:46:01.000 We're the wave, you know?
00:46:02.000 And then so every time, like, they shout us out, we'd be like, whoa! 1.00
00:46:06.000 And like sometimes a whole crowd will fucking do it and shit. 0.99
00:46:09.000 You know what I'm saying? 1.00
00:46:10.000 Because it's literally a wave of whatever the fuck's about to happen after this joke. 0.97
00:46:15.000 You know what I'm saying? 0.98
00:46:16.000 And you guys did it for it.
00:46:18.000 Like I came to the store in 2014 and one of the things, I came back to the store, one of the things that brought me back, the big thing that brought me back was Ari because Ari was filming a special there the next day and I had to go.
00:46:29.000 I had to be there for that.
00:46:30.000 Ari's one of my best friends.
00:46:31.000 And the other thing was, I wanted to see Roast Battle, because everybody told me about it.
00:46:36.000 And I remember being up there and sitting in that audience going, wow, this is special.
00:46:41.000 Like, first of all, the jokes, the joke writing was excellent.
00:46:45.000 These people that I didn't even know, they were crushing each other, and then you guys would run on stage and make Chaos. 0.98
00:46:51.000 And I was like, this is a wild, creative fucking show. 0.99
00:46:54.000 But that was 2014. Yeah. 0.99
00:46:56.000 So we're talking about six, seven years, seven without COVID, six years of solid performances.
00:47:05.000 Yup, yup, yup. 0.95
00:47:06.000 And it was so fucking fun. 0.97
00:47:07.000 And the dope, one of the dopest things about that, and it made me really appreciate what we get to do, you know, is I remember a time we went to JFL to do it live. 0.97
00:47:23.000 And I was sitting there and I was getting kind of nervous about the show because this was a live show.
00:47:29.000 They were going to do it live for Comedy Central.
00:47:31.000 And I was like, I was a little nervous about the show, like in my hotel room.
00:47:34.000 And I was like, bro, I was telling myself, I was like, man, you need to chill out.
00:47:38.000 And I said, what you need to do, get those red pants, get that wig and go up there and dance like James Brown. 0.81
00:47:46.000 Oh yeah!
00:47:47.000 Get up!
00:47:49.000 And so there was a bit of... 0.84
00:47:55.000 I don't know whose battle it was, but I don't know if you ever got it or whatever, but it's me up there dancing like James Brown and shit like that or whatever. 0.79
00:48:04.000 We were having a great time.
00:48:05.000 Even online may have not liked it, but if you were there... 1.00
00:48:10.000 Listen, man, fuck the online. 1.00
00:48:13.000 Yeah, fuck them, for real. 1.00
00:48:14.000 Fuck that. 1.00
00:48:15.000 They're just a bunch of malcontents. 1.00
00:48:20.000 You know, this is what I always say. 0.99
00:48:22.000 It's not like people don't comment interesting shit on YouTube videos or Instagram. 0.99
00:48:27.000 They do. 0.99
00:48:28.000 There's some people that do. 1.00
00:48:29.000 But the people that complain all the time, most of them, 99% of them, I'm making that number up, are fucking losers. 1.00
00:48:36.000 That's why they're complaining about shit all the time. 1.00
00:48:39.000 Well, I figured that's what the comment section is for anyway, because I ain't gonna lie, I'm gonna troll my goddamn self. 1.00
00:48:43.000 Yeah. 0.97
00:48:44.000 So, yeah, yeah, yeah, but all that mattered to us is that we were having fun and that we got to do this.
00:48:51.000 It's one of the best parts of the show.
00:48:52.000 Yeah, man.
00:48:53.000 Anybody who doesn't get that, it's one of the best parts.
00:48:55.000 I remember there was one where somebody got somebody.
00:48:58.000 I forget what happened, but you guys came out with, what are those things that pop out of cans that look like worms and Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:49:05.000 The streamers were popping out.
00:49:08.000 You guys were rolling.
00:49:08.000 I'm like, this is wild!
00:49:11.000 Because whoever it was got this person so good, and then you guys all fell out on the stage like, and it was amazing.
00:49:22.000 It was amazing.
00:49:23.000 And you could see in the audience, the laughter was hard, and then it took it to another level.
00:49:27.000 And then people were like, this show is amazing.
00:49:35.000 Yeah.
00:49:36.000 Yeah.
00:49:38.000 Yeah.
00:49:49.000 Right, right, right.
00:49:49.000 You know what I mean?
00:49:50.000 Moses is like, I don't have a side.
00:49:53.000 I'm just, go ahead.
00:49:55.000 Yeah.
00:49:55.000 All right, break it up.
00:49:56.000 But he's also fun, and he's just a good dude.
00:50:00.000 Yeah.
00:50:01.000 So it's like, that comes off when he's on stage.
00:50:03.000 Yeah.
00:50:03.000 And then when he would host it, it was just, man!
00:50:06.000 I miss that show.
00:50:07.000 I used to drop in on Tuesday nights just to watch, just to see some chaos and just see some creativity and some young comics just getting after it.
00:50:16.000 Yeah, dude. 0.98
00:50:17.000 And I used to get up there and I used to fucking battle and all that shit. 0.98
00:50:23.000 And that was fun. 0.98
00:50:24.000 But then I had to stop doing that because I don't like the idea of thinking about somebody for two whole fucking weeks and stuff like that. 0.95
00:50:31.000 Writing jokes. 0.91
00:50:32.000 Yeah.
00:50:32.000 But it did help, like, my joke writing and all that stuff.
00:50:35.000 Oh, it's a great joke writing exercise.
00:50:37.000 Oh, absolutely.
00:50:38.000 But I think being in the wave, like, really, like, developed me, though, as a performer, though, too. 0.97
00:50:44.000 Like, that was doing some work on our shit, too, you know? 0.85
00:50:47.000 Oh, yeah, you had to commit. 0.99
00:50:49.000 And the other thing is that that was a late-night show.
00:50:52.000 And it was always sold out.
00:50:54.000 It was perfect.
00:50:54.000 It was always sold out.
00:50:56.000 Like, there was a line.
00:50:57.000 I mean, what time did that thing start?
00:50:59.000 Okay, it would start at 1030. They would do like a mic or like a little book spots ahead and then at 1145. That's when it would start.
00:51:10.000 So really, the show started at almost midnight on a Tuesday night and it would be mobbed.
00:51:15.000 Yep.
00:51:16.000 Mobbed!
00:51:16.000 I mean, it was supposed to have...
00:51:18.000 Listen, I'm not going back to the store, because it's not going back.
00:51:21.000 It's not going to be the store again.
00:51:23.000 I'll go back if it comes back, but I'm going to be honest about the numbers.
00:51:26.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:51:26.000 The fire department probably wanted about 80 people in there.
00:51:29.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:51:29.000 There was probably about 150. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:51:31.000 Easy, 200. You couldn't wear good shoes up there.
00:51:33.000 You'd get fucked. 0.99
00:51:34.000 I was downstairs below it, and I remember someone was crushing, and you guys were jumping around, and the ceiling was moving. 0.99
00:51:41.000 I was like, oh my god.
00:51:42.000 I was like, when was the last time anybody did a structural assessment?
00:51:45.000 Just to hang up in those back stairs just so you could hear.
00:51:47.000 If you couldn't get in, you'd be like, I'm open if you can hear it.
00:51:49.000 Yes, yes.
00:51:50.000 But there was some motion at one time.
00:51:54.000 The ceiling was moving. 0.99
00:51:55.000 I was like, imagine if everybody just came piling into the fucking kitchen. 0.98
00:51:59.000 If the ceiling collapsed. 0.99
00:52:01.000 Mm-hmm. 1.00
00:52:02.000 Fuck! 1.00
00:52:02.000 Oh, yeah, man. 1.00
00:52:03.000 We used to turn that fucking belly room out, man. 1.00
00:52:05.000 We need to do that shit out here. 1.00
00:52:07.000 We need to have roast battle in Austin. 1.00
00:52:08.000 He brought...
00:52:09.000 The guy Frost doing... 0.99
00:52:10.000 He ain't doing shit. 0.98
00:52:11.000 Yeah. 0.90
00:52:13.000 Come on out, Jeff Ross.
00:52:15.000 Some guy brought it up that he was going to start it back up out here and he was like, I would love for you to do the wave and I was like, I don't do the wave anymore, kid.
00:52:27.000 I'm past that.
00:52:29.000 I tried to big time him.
00:52:31.000 Well, you probably should be past that.
00:52:34.000 Yeah, I mean, but that's what I'm saying.
00:52:35.000 I would definitely do something with my friends, with the wave or whatever, but I don't want to go on stage and...
00:52:42.000 Yeah.
00:52:43.000 No, I get it.
00:52:43.000 I get it.
00:52:44.000 You did it forever.
00:52:45.000 Yeah.
00:52:45.000 But it was just...
00:52:47.000 I think things that are just wild like that are great for the soul of comedy.
00:52:52.000 Yeah.
00:52:52.000 That's what I felt when I was there in that audience.
00:52:55.000 And again, this was the night before Ari filmed a special.
00:52:57.000 Mm-hmm.
00:52:58.000 I decided I had to go there a day earlier.
00:52:59.000 I'll be overwhelmed because I knew I was going to start crying.
00:53:03.000 So I got there.
00:53:04.000 I was like, okay, let me just see what the store is like now.
00:53:07.000 And then Jeff Ross introduced me to the crowd and it was weird, man.
00:53:11.000 It felt weird.
00:53:12.000 It felt like, oh my god, it was crazy.
00:53:15.000 But the feeling of the room was like, this is...
00:53:19.000 This is not the same comedy store that I left seven years ago.
00:53:22.000 This is a better place.
00:53:24.000 It's more creative.
00:53:25.000 It's more wild.
00:53:26.000 To be there, that wasn't packed the same way.
00:53:31.000 That was only a legit 90 people, but it was still fun, man.
00:53:35.000 It was crazy.
00:53:36.000 Crazy.
00:53:36.000 Yeah, man.
00:53:37.000 We used to tear the roof off that place, man.
00:53:39.000 Oh, my God.
00:53:40.000 Because, you know, we'd work all week doing whatever job we had before.
00:53:46.000 You know, maybe it was a writing job or somebody had. 0.98
00:53:49.000 But every fucking Tuesday, you know, every fucking Tuesday, like me, Jeremiah, and Willie, we'd get giddy. 1.00
00:53:55.000 We'd be like, oh, shit. 1.00
00:53:56.000 You gonna do that? 1.00
00:53:57.000 Okay, okay.
00:53:59.000 Yeah.
00:53:59.000 I'm like, all right, man.
00:54:00.000 I'm gonna get Willie.
00:54:01.000 All right, I'm gonna get Willie.
00:54:02.000 I remember Dennis Rodman jumped in the wave.
00:54:04.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:54:05.000 Dennis Rodman, big drunk ass, jumped in the fucking wave. 1.00
00:54:08.000 We were like, fuck it. 1.00
00:54:09.000 I was like, this is what kind of party it is. 1.00
00:54:11.000 Dennis Rodman, Bobby Brown jumped in the wave.
00:54:14.000 Bobby Brown was there?
00:54:15.000 Bobby Brown was at the store a bunch of times.
00:54:17.000 Yeah.
00:54:19.000 I ran into Bobby Brown at a sushi place.
00:54:22.000 It was one of those weird things where when I was a kid, every little step I take...
00:54:27.000 You know, like, I knew Bobby.
00:54:29.000 Everybody knew Bobby Brown.
00:54:30.000 Yeah.
00:54:30.000 So I run into Bobby Brown at a sushi place.
00:54:32.000 He says hi to me.
00:54:33.000 He was like, what's up, Joe?
00:54:34.000 I was like, oh my God, Bobby Brown knows who I am.
00:54:36.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:54:36.000 It was so strange.
00:54:37.000 Shaking his hand, giving him a hug.
00:54:39.000 I was like, wow, Bobby Brown.
00:54:40.000 Bobby Brown.
00:54:41.000 It's crazy.
00:54:42.000 Oh, man.
00:54:44.000 Yeah.
00:54:44.000 That comedy store, you know, that place was such a...
00:54:49.000 Look, look, look.
00:54:49.000 Oh, look at you guys.
00:54:51.000 Is this the best of age?
00:54:52.000 Look at Dennis Rodman!
00:54:54.000 Dennis Rodman!
00:54:56.000 And Jeremiah's translating!
00:54:58.000 Look at Moses!
00:55:00.000 Oh my god, that's hilarious.
00:55:06.000 Dennis, Dennis, Dennis!
00:55:07.000 We already know everything about you!
00:55:09.000 There's nothing else!
00:55:11.000 And WorldStar doesn't have subtitles. 0.98
00:55:12.000 What the fuck is happening right now? 0.98
00:55:21.000 Oh, that's so funny. 0.99
00:55:23.000 Well, there's a real value in a little club like that, a tiny spot.
00:55:27.000 And that's one of the things that I want to have out here.
00:55:29.000 I want to have a small club, too.
00:55:31.000 I don't think you just have a big club like the main room.
00:55:34.000 I think you need a belly room. 0.99
00:55:35.000 I think you need a little laboratory, you know, just to fuck around. 1.00
00:55:39.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:55:40.000 Like, it would be really hard to create a show like that or, like, a lot of others.
00:55:43.000 Like, Kill Tony started out in the belly room, too.
00:55:46.000 Yep, I remember that.
00:55:47.000 Yeah, like, you need a laboratory. 0.99
00:55:49.000 You need a place where you're just kind of fucking around. 0.97
00:55:52.000 There's lower expectations. 0.99
00:55:53.000 It's more of a hang.
00:55:54.000 When you get to a large audience, everybody's like, wow, this place is packed.
00:55:57.000 This is a big thing.
00:55:58.000 Yeah, like, you do that small club to go do the big club.
00:56:00.000 Yeah, exactly.
00:56:02.000 But I feel like it's, like...
00:56:04.000 Like, training.
00:56:05.000 Like, you need to do running, and then you also need to hit the bag. 1.00
00:56:09.000 You need to do different shit. 0.99
00:56:10.000 You need to lift weights. 0.99
00:56:12.000 You need cross-training.
00:56:13.000 Yep.
00:56:13.000 It's so funny.
00:56:14.000 I remember.
00:56:15.000 I remember.
00:56:16.000 I still do.
00:56:17.000 But, like, I would speak about training and stuff like that. 0.99
00:56:20.000 Like, I would go to the gym for fucking six hours, Joe. 0.99
00:56:26.000 Six hours every motherfucking day, bro. 1.00
00:56:28.000 Just to mentally prepare myself for doing comedy. 0.99
00:56:33.000 Six hours?
00:56:34.000 Yeah, bro.
00:56:34.000 What would you do for six hours?
00:56:36.000 Anything I could think of.
00:56:38.000 Really? 0.98
00:56:38.000 Anything I could fucking... 0.98
00:56:39.000 I accidentally learned how to box just by being in the gym for six hours. 0.99
00:56:46.000 Like for every fucking day. 0.99
00:56:49.000 You learned boxing by yourself? 1.00
00:56:51.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:56:51.000 I would take little...
00:56:53.000 I would see people in the gym and stuff like that.
00:56:56.000 What gym were you working out at?
00:56:58.000 Fortune, Box Engine.
00:56:59.000 Oh, okay.
00:56:59.000 Justin Fortune.
00:57:00.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:57:01.000 He's legit.
00:57:02.000 Yeah, I love Justin.
00:57:03.000 Joey Diaz used to go there, too.
00:57:04.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:57:05.000 All the...
00:57:06.000 Yeah, all...
00:57:06.000 I like...
00:57:07.000 You see fucking Sylvester Stallone, brother, in that motherfucker. 1.00
00:57:10.000 Ew! 1.00
00:57:11.000 I'm here to work out, though. 0.99
00:57:13.000 Just to fucking mentally prepare myself for a fucking 15-minute set at the Comedy Store. 1.00
00:57:18.000 Like, it's fucking retarded. 1.00
00:57:20.000 So you just hit a fight, didn't you? 1.00
00:57:22.000 Didn't you take a fight?
00:57:23.000 Yeah, I did.
00:57:24.000 We talked about it before.
00:57:26.000 We talked about it.
00:57:27.000 It was almost a year ago.
00:57:28.000 Yeah, right before COVID hit, actually.
00:57:30.000 Yeah, you were telling me you were thinking about taking a fight.
00:57:32.000 I was like, whoa.
00:57:33.000 Okay.
00:57:34.000 I said, because I was going to go do Golden Gloves.
00:57:36.000 Yeah.
00:57:37.000 I was 34, so I was like, and I was going to do the Golden Gloves because I was 34, and the cutoff to do it is 35. And one of the main reasons I wanted to do it, because I heard that...
00:57:52.000 I heard that Eddie Murphy had done it.
00:57:54.000 Eddie Murphy fought in the Golden Gloves?
00:57:56.000 Or Silver Gloves or some shit like that.
00:57:57.000 Really? 0.71
00:57:57.000 Or they used to box when they were younger. 0.71
00:57:59.000 And then Martin Lawrence. 1.00
00:58:00.000 Well, his brother Charlie was a bad motherfucker. 1.00
00:58:03.000 Legitimately. 1.00
00:58:03.000 Legitimately. 1.00
00:58:04.000 Very good martial artist.
00:58:05.000 I hear stories.
00:58:06.000 Yeah, he was good.
00:58:07.000 I was with Charlie Murphy, we were on tour, and I was with Maury Smith, who was UFC heavyweight champion, and Ivan Salivari, who was one of the top fighters in the UFC. And we had done a show together, and then me and Charlie did a show together, and then we all went out to eat, and these guys came out to see me.
00:58:23.000 So afterwards, we're all eating dinner, and I think Brian Redband had the photo of this conversation on his Instagram, and I think he sent it to me, and I might have put it on my Instagram or my Twitter.
00:58:37.000 But Charlie Murphy was holding court.
00:58:39.000 You got UFC, former heavyweight champion of the world, Maury Smith.
00:58:42.000 You got Ivan Salivari, top flight UFC fighter.
00:58:46.000 And you got me and a couple of my friends. 0.99
00:58:48.000 And then Charlie Murphy's standing up, talking about, you motherfuckers don't know how to throw the Chicago Ridge hand. 0.99
00:58:55.000 Like he had some strike. 0.99
00:58:57.000 That's it.
00:58:58.000 That's it right there.
00:58:59.000 That's it right there.
00:59:02.000 2007!
00:59:03.000 Look at Charlie!
00:59:04.000 That's Ivan Salivari's the guy with the watch on the far right side.
00:59:08.000 Maurice Smith is the guy with the white t-shirt right next to him.
00:59:11.000 Oh my god, dude.
00:59:12.000 I'm telling you, Charlie Murphy was holding court.
00:59:14.000 We were dying laughing.
00:59:16.000 And he was talking about...
00:59:18.000 Like, a ridge hand is a weird karate strike where you hit someone with, like, this side of your hand.
00:59:23.000 You, like, throw it like this.
00:59:25.000 I mean, it's got its place.
00:59:27.000 Like, you know how sometimes dudes in MMA, they KO a guy and then they hammer fist a guy?
00:59:33.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:59:33.000 Because it's really the best move in certain situations.
00:59:35.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:59:36.000 And then a ridge hand, Charlie Murph was saying, y'all motherfuckers don't know about the ridge hand. 0.99
00:59:40.000 Chicago ridge hand. 0.99
00:59:41.000 He had, like, this Chicago-style ridge hand.
00:59:44.000 I don't know. 1.00
00:59:44.000 This shit feels soft. 1.00
00:59:45.000 It's not the best way to hit somebody. 1.00
00:59:48.000 But you could, for sure, you could fuck somebody up. 0.99
00:59:53.000 If you're hitting soft tissue in the face, I wouldn't recommend it for the top of the head. 0.99
00:59:58.000 Knuckles are better, for sure.
01:00:00.000 Yeah, I would never Chicago Ridge hand somebody.
01:00:02.000 Maybe my little brother.
01:00:03.000 Is that Charlie Box?
01:00:04.000 No, no, that's me.
01:00:05.000 That's me. 1.00
01:00:06.000 This motherfucker was so fat. 1.00
01:00:08.000 The other guy you fought? 1.00
01:00:09.000 Look at this.
01:00:10.000 Box.
01:00:11.000 Oh, dude!
01:00:12.000 Look at you swinging wild! 1.00
01:00:13.000 I was like the other thing watching that bitch. 1.00
01:00:15.000 Are you left-handed? 1.00
01:00:16.000 I am. 1.00
01:00:17.000 Oh, shit. 1.00
01:00:17.000 No kidding. 1.00
01:00:19.000 Oh, dude, Jamar, look at you go!
01:00:22.000 And you get a drink of water when the guy's down?
01:00:24.000 You're not supposed to do that.
01:00:26.000 That's over anyway, right?
01:00:28.000 Isn't it over?
01:00:29.000 Yeah, he quit.
01:00:30.000 The only reason, and I don't take crazy credit for it.
01:00:35.000 I mean, a win is a win for sure. 1.00
01:00:37.000 I mean, that guy was fat as fuck. 1.00
01:00:39.000 So you had, guys are wearing masks. 1.00
01:00:40.000 This was COVID. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:00:42.000 When did this fight happen?
01:00:44.000 Yeah, yeah, it was.
01:00:45.000 When did this happen?
01:00:46.000 This is like in October.
01:00:48.000 In October.
01:00:49.000 So did they test you at all?
01:00:50.000 No, man.
01:00:52.000 No.
01:00:53.000 They made a sign of release that says, hey, we're not responsible for anything that happens. 0.91
01:00:57.000 Any diseases you might catch while you beat the shit out of each other?
01:01:00.000 Yeah, and I only did that because I didn't get to do the Golden Gloves.
01:01:03.000 Remember, I walked up to you and I was like, Joe, I'm thinking about doing the Golden Gloves.
01:01:05.000 You're like, have you ever fought?
01:01:07.000 And I was like, yeah, I mean, I spar every now and then.
01:01:10.000 Yeah.
01:01:11.000 Well, I knew you were in really good shape.
01:01:13.000 You were throwing a monkey wrench into this thing that I always disputed.
01:01:17.000 There was a thing where people said you couldn't be funny if you were in great shape.
01:01:21.000 Yeah.
01:01:22.000 Because you would go on stage jacked with this full six pack and killing it. 1.00
01:01:26.000 I still do that shit. 1.00
01:01:26.000 Shirt off! 1.00
01:01:27.000 And I was like, it's possible.
01:01:29.000 Look how funny Jamar is.
01:01:30.000 And he's up there with no shirt on.
01:01:31.000 He's shredded.
01:01:32.000 Well, yeah, yeah, yeah. 1.00
01:01:34.000 People think I do that shit just to show off my body. 1.00
01:01:37.000 And I swear to God, I do it because I think that shit is funny. 1.00
01:01:41.000 It's kind of ridiculous. 0.99
01:01:42.000 I mean, just like the mohawk. 0.96
01:01:44.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:01:44.000 That's not even really yours.
01:01:46.000 Hell no, it's not, man. 1.00
01:01:47.000 That shit's glued to his head. 1.00
01:01:48.000 You need to know this. 1.00
01:01:49.000 Steve Harvey did it for years.
01:01:51.000 I could be with my little mohawk.
01:01:53.000 I mean...
01:01:54.000 I don't know why he did it.
01:01:56.000 He's got a great head.
01:01:57.000 Yeah, but back then...
01:01:58.000 Back then, you couldn't be bald.
01:02:00.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:02:01.000 That shit was too perfect. 1.00
01:02:02.000 We in the hood, we used to debate that shit. 1.00
01:02:04.000 Like, that is really... 1.00
01:02:05.000 How's this whole perfect deal?
01:02:07.000 That's perfect.
01:02:07.000 People can have a perfect hairline, bro.
01:02:09.000 Some people can't have a perfect hairline.
01:02:11.000 It's just not a lot of people. 1.00
01:02:11.000 That shit looked like a microphone. 1.00
01:02:13.000 He was destined to be a comic. 1.00
01:02:15.000 Listen, they did it right.
01:02:16.000 They did a good job on it.
01:02:18.000 Yeah.
01:02:18.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:02:19.000 Steve Harvey wear a wig.
01:02:21.000 That's crazy. 1.00
01:02:22.000 His shit was perfect. 1.00
01:02:24.000 His lineup? 1.00
01:02:25.000 Oh, God, it was great.
01:02:27.000 Well, you know, some dudes can pull it off. 0.91
01:02:29.000 Yeah, that is a perfect line.
01:02:31.000 It's perfect. 0.99
01:02:33.000 God, this must get sweaty as fuck in there when you're on stage. 0.98
01:02:37.000 You know? 0.99
01:02:38.000 Killing it for an hour. 1.00
01:02:40.000 Sweating his wig on top of your head. 1.00
01:02:42.000 And I'd be playing with this shit like it's my real hair and shit, too. 1.00
01:02:47.000 How do you glue that thing on your head? 1.00
01:02:49.000 It's double-sided wig tape.
01:02:52.000 I bought this from a costume store. 0.98
01:02:58.000 It's so fucked up how I started doing it. 0.98
01:03:00.000 I was doing this one-man show, and I had these four different characters. 0.99
01:03:05.000 I was looking at the characters, and I was like, okay, that guy's fine.
01:03:10.000 That guy's fine.
01:03:10.000 I was like, this guy needs a wig.
01:03:13.000 And I was like, yeah, this guy needs a wig.
01:03:16.000 So I went to the costume store, and I tried on a jerry curl wig.
01:03:19.000 And I was like, nah, man.
01:03:20.000 I was like, something a little more. 1.00
01:03:21.000 And then I just put this motherfucker on. 1.00
01:03:24.000 I was like, bro. 1.00
01:03:25.000 I was like, that's it.
01:03:26.000 Let's go.
01:03:28.000 And then after the one-man show, I just started wearing it.
01:03:33.000 I was like, bro, I think you can just rock this.
01:03:35.000 And then so I'm like...
01:03:37.000 I love how you wear it sometimes and sometimes not.
01:03:40.000 I got to see you at the comedy store and sometimes Jamar would have the mohawk and sometimes not.
01:03:45.000 Because I wear it like a hat.
01:03:47.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:03:49.000 Like a sweater.
01:03:50.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:03:51.000 Bro, I can't, bro.
01:03:53.000 I want a purple one.
01:03:55.000 Ooh.
01:03:56.000 I swear.
01:03:57.000 Why not?
01:03:57.000 Yeah, I gotta figure out where to get this purple one.
01:04:00.000 Online.
01:04:01.000 Online, for sure.
01:04:02.000 I got this.
01:04:03.000 Jamie will find one right now.
01:04:04.000 Purple mohawk mohawk.
01:04:06.000 Gonna have a bunch of DMs right now and be like, I'll make you a blue one. 0.75
01:04:08.000 Some of them will make you all kinds of colors.
01:04:09.000 They'll probably make you the whole rainbow.
01:04:11.000 Send them, baby.
01:04:12.000 Send them.
01:04:13.000 You need a gold one.
01:04:15.000 Oh my god.
01:04:18.000 I was just looking at your chains.
01:04:19.000 I was like, imagine a gold one.
01:04:20.000 Bro, with the shirt off?
01:04:21.000 Oh my god.
01:04:23.000 Oh my god. 1.00
01:04:24.000 You would need a net to catch all that pussy. 1.00
01:04:26.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:04:30.000 My grandma's stinkpussies in here. 1.00
01:04:32.000 Get the shit out of here, bitch. 1.00
01:04:33.000 Please bring that back. 1.00
01:04:34.000 Fine.
01:04:35.000 For you, I'll do it.
01:04:36.000 I'll do it.
01:04:37.000 Please bring it back.
01:04:38.000 Please bring it back.
01:04:39.000 Are you working this weekend?
01:04:41.000 I'm done out here.
01:04:42.000 You're not working at all?
01:04:44.000 What are you doing Saturday night? 0.70
01:04:45.000 I got WTF. I got WTF tonight and after that I'm... 0.95
01:04:49.000 What is WTF? It's this little bar called Whiskey Tangle, Fox Terrier or some shit like that. 0.99
01:04:55.000 But I fly back on the 30th.
01:04:57.000 What's popping on the 30th?
01:04:59.000 Tomorrow night is Tony's show.
01:05:00.000 Tony's got a show at Vulcan, and I'm there.
01:05:03.000 Oh, that's right.
01:05:04.000 Friends of Tony. 1.00
01:05:05.000 Oh, fuck. 1.00
01:05:06.000 Yeah, what are you doing then? 1.00
01:05:08.000 Fuck. 1.00
01:05:09.000 Am I going to have to extend my stay? 1.00
01:05:13.000 Fuck. 1.00
01:05:14.000 I mean, I would... 1.00
01:05:16.000 Damn, I feel like I want to fuck with that. 1.00
01:05:18.000 Come on down, Jamar. 1.00
01:05:22.000 Alright, I'll stretch it out one day.
01:05:24.000 Stretch it out a day.
01:05:26.000 Come on, fellas.
01:05:27.000 Peer pressure, peer pressure.
01:05:29.000 Come have some fun.
01:05:30.000 It'll be great to hang and see you. 1.00
01:05:33.000 Fucking waiting on auditions and shit. 1.00
01:05:35.000 Hearing sirens and helicopters. 1.00
01:05:36.000 Fuck, man. 1.00
01:05:37.000 We went down to the comedy store to film that... 1.00
01:05:39.000 There was one last night where they filmed that... 0.99
01:05:45.000 The Comedy Store documentary, and it was Whitney Cummings, and me, and Andy Letterman, and Bill Burr, and Paul Rodriguez, and Jay Leno, and we were all up on the roof, and man, it was sad as fuck.
01:05:56.000 The Comedy Store was abandoned, and dudes were racing down Sunset, because there was no one there.
01:06:00.000 So there was like, you know how they have a lot of those dudes with real money, like live in Beverly Hills, and they have Lamborghinis, and we'd always see them on Sunset.
01:06:08.000 Well, they were racing.
01:06:10.000 I mean, racing.
01:06:11.000 Yeah.
01:06:14.000 Like, you would hear that.
01:06:15.000 Like, guys flying down Sunset.
01:06:17.000 Because no cops were stopping anybody for anything.
01:06:20.000 Yeah.
01:06:20.000 This was just a few months after George Floyd.
01:06:22.000 It was all this defund the police talk in the air.
01:06:25.000 It was past looting and rioting, and everybody was scared. 0.99
01:06:27.000 And the cops didn't do a goddamn thing about it. 0.86
01:06:29.000 And you would really... 0.98
01:06:30.000 You felt, like, the deterioration of the fabric of the city.
01:06:34.000 You felt it in the air.
01:06:35.000 It was really disturbing.
01:06:37.000 It made me sad.
01:06:38.000 What do you think is going to happen to the store?
01:06:42.000 Mad Max.
01:06:43.000 Mad Max?
01:06:44.000 Yeah, I think LA is going Mad Max.
01:06:46.000 I think LA, it's going to be five years before LA comes back.
01:06:49.000 That's what I think.
01:06:50.000 I think they lost 75% of their restaurants.
01:06:53.000 Who knows what percentage of bars and small businesses, but John Terzarian and Craig from Craig's, the restaurant in LA, they were on the podcast, they were telling me the actual numbers.
01:07:06.000 Did I say his name wrong again?
01:07:08.000 Terzian.
01:07:09.000 I said Terzarian. 0.98
01:07:10.000 Why do I have to say that? 1.00
01:07:11.000 You know, listen, I just suck at fucking last names. 1.00
01:07:19.000 Armenians have great last names, though. 0.99
01:07:21.000 It's always an E. Terzarian, Terzian, Parisian, Kardashian. 0.74
01:07:27.000 It's always an E. Really interesting.
01:07:31.000 Man, that makes me sad, man.
01:07:33.000 That means I'm going to have to move out here.
01:07:34.000 Well, you're going to have to move out here, Jamar, anyway.
01:07:36.000 This is going to be the spot.
01:07:38.000 Fine, fine.
01:07:38.000 We're going to put this together.
01:07:39.000 What I want to do is I want to have a spot run by a comic.
01:07:43.000 Yeah.
01:07:44.000 Which we've never had before.
01:07:45.000 Everyone's run by business people.
01:07:47.000 The comedy store's been the closest place to that. 0.98
01:07:50.000 It was run by a crazy lady. 1.00
01:07:51.000 Yeah. 0.95
01:07:52.000 And then when the crazy lady died, the comedians had already made it so profitable. 0.96
01:07:57.000 And it was a real fortunate turn of events that, like, I came back in 2014 and Mitzi died shortly thereafter. 0.85
01:08:04.000 And it was like, the way everything rolled out, it was the show, the place had become so profitable they didn't want to fuck anything up.
01:08:11.000 So it's not like they could have brought a business person in there and started doing it in a way that they would do like a road club where you had a headliner and a middle and an opening act and...
01:08:22.000 They could have done it that way.
01:08:23.000 If they needed a way to make a lot of money, that would have been the way to do it.
01:08:28.000 But we made them a lot of money at the store, and they made all the money.
01:08:33.000 It was an interesting situation.
01:08:35.000 They realized, well, we've got a real good spot here because...
01:08:39.000 Any other club where you would have sold out shows Monday through Sunday, the comics would be making most of the money.
01:08:48.000 That's how it is if you go to Nashville.
01:08:50.000 That's how it is if you go to Dallas.
01:08:52.000 If you're a murderer, you're coming into town and you're going to sell out every show in advance and everybody knows, you make the lion's share of the money and they make the bar.
01:09:00.000 That's what happens.
01:09:02.000 But at the Comedy Store, that wasn't the case.
01:09:03.000 The Comedy Store is a great financial situation for them.
01:09:07.000 They made a lot of money.
01:09:07.000 And we were happy that they made a lot of money because it kept the place open.
01:09:10.000 It kept this community going.
01:09:13.000 And it had gotten so profitable that even though Mitzi had left...
01:09:17.000 Left this earth, she left behind this system that had encouraged wild comedy. 0.97
01:09:23.000 But most places don't do that.
01:09:26.000 Most places, they want an opening act, a middle, and a headliner.
01:09:30.000 They want the person to have TV credits so the people come see them.
01:09:34.000 And they want to sell a lot of tickets.
01:09:36.000 And they want to make a lot of money.
01:09:38.000 And that's how most comedy clubs work.
01:09:40.000 I don't want to work that way.
01:09:42.000 I want a comedy club that's run by the comics.
01:09:45.000 Keep the freedom.
01:09:45.000 Keep the freedom.
01:09:47.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:09:48.000 You gotta have...
01:09:48.000 To create?
01:09:50.000 Yeah.
01:09:50.000 You need freedom.
01:09:51.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:09:52.000 You need to be able to talk about your grandmother's stinky pussy. 1.00
01:09:54.000 Goddamn right. 1.00
01:09:55.000 You have to. 0.95
01:09:55.000 You need that. 0.95
01:09:56.000 If someone comes along and says you can't do that, well, look, maybe you can't do that.
01:10:01.000 But the only way to find out if you can't do that is to do it.
01:10:04.000 Yeah.
01:10:05.000 You know? 1.00
01:10:05.000 There's a lot of shit. 1.00
01:10:06.000 They think about some of the things that Diaz has done on stage or Theo's done on stage or you have done on stage or all the wild people at the store have done on stage. 1.00
01:10:14.000 The only way to find out if that's gonna work is let them try it.
01:10:17.000 Yeah.
01:10:18.000 Yep.
01:10:18.000 That's it.
01:10:19.000 Yep.
01:10:20.000 Yep.
01:10:21.000 I don't know, man.
01:10:23.000 It's a great place to live.
01:10:25.000 Yeah, man.
01:10:25.000 I mean, I'm still feeling it.
01:10:27.000 I don't care who got shot outside of my Airbnb today.
01:10:30.000 I'm like...
01:10:31.000 Are you sure they got shot?
01:10:32.000 Maybe someone shot at them.
01:10:33.000 No, bro.
01:10:34.000 No, bro. 0.98
01:10:34.000 So I was catching an Uber to go to the motherfucking gym, and the Uber guy called me and said, hey, man, did something just happen to you? 0.98
01:10:46.000 And I was like, nah, man, I'm in my Airbnb. 0.98
01:10:49.000 He was like, oh, well...
01:10:51.000 I just saw somebody get shot outside of your Airbnb.
01:10:54.000 And I was like, nah, that wasn't me.
01:10:58.000 And then he was like, well, if you still want to catch this Uber, I'll be up the street at the Jack in the Box. 0.62
01:11:03.000 And I said, nigga, I'm not about to walk down the street. 0.99
01:11:06.000 Nigga, leave. 1.00
01:11:07.000 Leave. 0.99
01:11:08.000 And he was like, alright. 1.00
01:11:09.000 And I was like, fuck, and I just stayed in the house. 0.98
01:11:11.000 The Uber situation is so interesting. 0.99
01:11:13.000 Because no one ever saw that coming.
01:11:15.000 Here's the thing, like, cabs have been around since the beginning of time.
01:11:18.000 Just to come up with an Uber?
01:11:18.000 Yeah.
01:11:19.000 Cabs have been around for the...
01:11:20.000 From forever.
01:11:22.000 From the beginning of time.
01:11:23.000 There's been cabs.
01:11:24.000 You know, you call a cab.
01:11:25.000 You hail a cab in New York City.
01:11:27.000 Somebody figured out, like, wouldn't it be cool if you could just use your car and make money?
01:11:31.000 Just driving people around?
01:11:33.000 And it seemed so simple.
01:11:34.000 So simple.
01:11:34.000 That you're like, how come I didn't think?
01:11:37.000 Because we get people rise anyway everywhere. 0.97
01:11:39.000 But California had to step in and fuck it up. 1.00
01:11:42.000 They're like, these people need health insurance and they need dental. 0.96
01:11:46.000 They just did that.
01:11:48.000 No, it's a gig.
01:11:49.000 It's an easy way to make money on the side.
01:11:52.000 And you can do it as long as you want and make as much money as you want. 0.95
01:11:55.000 Stop fucking it up with insurance. 0.99
01:11:57.000 Stop fucking it up. 0.99
01:11:58.000 This is not a career. 1.00
01:12:01.000 You're not talking about a dental surgeon.
01:12:03.000 You're talking about a guy who drives you places.
01:12:05.000 Just don't be a criminal. 0.99
01:12:07.000 Because a lot of the times, those Uber drivers do other shit. 1.00
01:12:11.000 Yes, most of the time. 0.99
01:12:12.000 Most of the time.
01:12:13.000 Yeah.
01:12:15.000 I'm like, you know, I really work at Walmart.
01:12:18.000 I mean, maybe they should be making more money.
01:12:20.000 Maybe there's an argument there.
01:12:21.000 Maybe they should be making more of a percentage.
01:12:23.000 You don't think it should be commissioned?
01:12:25.000 I mean, like, you don't think it should be commissioned?
01:12:27.000 Like, where are you driving to?
01:12:29.000 Yeah.
01:12:30.000 You know, I think it should just be like that.
01:12:31.000 You think they should get, like, something on top of that?
01:12:34.000 No.
01:12:35.000 No, I'm saying, like, I don't know what percentage they make.
01:12:37.000 Like, if it costs $20 to go somewhere, how much does the driver make?
01:12:41.000 Oh, right, right, right.
01:12:42.000 I don't know how much the driver makes.
01:12:43.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:12:45.000 Let's find this out.
01:12:46.000 What does an Uber driver average per hour?
01:12:49.000 Let's find that out.
01:12:51.000 What's an average if you totaled up all the Uber drivers in the country, all the different places they go?
01:12:57.000 What's the average that they make per hour?
01:13:01.000 Depends where you are.
01:13:02.000 I'm going to say $25.
01:13:04.000 Depends where you are and depends when they drive.
01:13:08.000 According to this, I'm looking at now, it's the cities, so under $20 an hour, average of $15 to $17 it looks like.
01:13:17.000 Oh, under $20 an hour?
01:13:20.000 I would have thought it would have been more.
01:13:21.000 It says average of $8 to, I don't know, it's a wild change here.
01:13:24.000 Ew! 0.98
01:13:25.000 For Uber, I'm surprised.
01:13:27.000 I don't want to get anybody any ideas, but I'm like, has there ever been a thing where something bad happened in Uber? 1.00
01:13:37.000 You get in there with a crazy motherfucker. 1.00
01:13:39.000 Girls. 1.00
01:13:39.000 If I was a girl, I would be very scared to be in an Uber. 1.00
01:13:43.000 That's the trick part about Uber.
01:13:45.000 You, I wouldn't be scared to be in an Uber.
01:13:47.000 If I was a girl, I'd be scared to be in an Uber. 0.99
01:13:49.000 Yeah, I'm like, does shit like that happen? 0.99
01:13:52.000 Like, is the Uber driver ever crazy? 1.00
01:13:54.000 Fuck yes. 1.00
01:13:55.000 Girls have been raped in Ubers? 1.00
01:13:57.000 100%, man. 1.00
01:13:58.000 Damn. 1.00
01:13:58.000 Let's find that out. 1.00
01:13:59.000 How many times have, let's just not say Uber, just say rideshares, Lyft, Uber, how many times have women been sexually assaulted by their rideshare drivers? 1.00
01:14:09.000 Or even the guy who's in the Uber pool next to you, like, damn. 0.99
01:14:12.000 I remember I read a story about this woman. 0.98
01:14:14.000 She got an Uber and the Uber driver was taking her in a weird path and then parked under a bridge. 0.98
01:14:20.000 And she was like, what in the fuck is happening?
01:14:23.000 She called 911, jumped out of the car, but the dude took off. 1.00
01:14:29.000 But he parked under a fucking bridge. 0.99
01:14:32.000 Like, what are you doing? 1.00
01:14:35.000 You don't know who they are.
01:14:37.000 You don't know anything about them.
01:14:38.000 You're just hopping in the car.
01:14:39.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:14:40.000 And that's the thing about Uber.
01:14:43.000 Because did that ever happen with taxi drivers?
01:14:45.000 Oh, yeah.
01:14:46.000 Oh, yeah.
01:14:46.000 For sure.
01:14:47.000 According to this thing I'm looking at, according to Uber's data, 42% of those reporting sexual assault were the drivers.
01:14:53.000 Oh, yeah. 1.00
01:14:54.000 A lot of chicks want some dick. 1.00
01:14:55.000 Is that what's up? 1.00
01:14:57.000 Or is it girl drivers? 1.00
01:14:59.000 It could be that, too.
01:14:59.000 I've had friends who drove Uber who'd be like, yo, man, you know what I'm saying?
01:15:04.000 This chick, you know, let me come in the house. 1.00
01:15:08.000 Yeah.
01:15:08.000 I was like, oh, I need to drive an Uber.
01:15:12.000 Fuck comedy. 1.00
01:15:13.000 Well, if girls are drunk and it's closing time and they're getting a ride home and they start vibing with the driver, the next thing you know... 1.00
01:15:20.000 I got friends who got stories.
01:15:22.000 I'm sure.
01:15:24.000 But that's okay.
01:15:25.000 That's just two people having fun.
01:15:26.000 I'm worried about what happens to the passengers.
01:15:29.000 So, what is the statistics?
01:15:33.000 The article I'm looking at came out in December of 2019, so it doesn't have the 2020 data because it's probably different.
01:15:41.000 It said over 3,000 cases were reported for Uber.
01:15:46.000 There were 19 women at the time that had sued Lyft.
01:15:53.000 30%.
01:15:53.000 It says, but drivers especially, Ralph, are the 19% of Uber drivers and 30% of Lyft drivers who are women are often reported being groped by passengers.
01:16:01.000 Okay, yeah, that's a different animal.
01:16:03.000 That's female drivers. 1.00
01:16:05.000 Yeah, that makes sense.
01:16:07.000 It's all dudes.
01:16:07.000 We're the problem, Jamar.
01:16:09.000 Yeah.
01:16:09.000 It's all men.
01:16:10.000 Just over 3,000 reports were nine murders in 50 people killed in crashes. 1.00
01:16:15.000 That sucks, man. 0.98
01:16:16.000 Nine murders? 0.99
01:16:17.000 By Lyft drivers and Uber drivers?
01:16:20.000 During the rides.
01:16:21.000 I don't know if it says who did what.
01:16:22.000 Or passengers, I'm sure.
01:16:24.000 I don't like Lyft because the cars are shittier.
01:16:26.000 I don't like the idea of a 96 Tercel coming to pick me up.
01:16:31.000 When I lived in New York City, one of the things that was happening was people were killing gypsy cab drivers.
01:16:37.000 There was a rash of gypsy cab driver murders when I lived in New York City.
01:16:41.000 So I lived in New Rochelle.
01:16:43.000 It wasn't New York City.
01:16:44.000 It was just outside the city.
01:16:45.000 But when I was working in New York City, it was like...
01:16:47.000 I guess I lived there in...
01:16:50.000 I moved there in 91-ish...
01:16:52.000 Yeah, somewhere around there, 91, 92. And there was a rash of cab driver murders where they would, people would pick up cabs and say, hey, you know, take me to Queens and then shoot the cab driver and take all their money.
01:17:06.000 Because a lot of these, there was gypsy cab drivers. 1.00
01:17:08.000 And gypsy cab drivers are essentially like, they didn't have a license. 1.00
01:17:11.000 And so a lot of it was immigrant dudes.
01:17:14.000 Illegal, yeah.
01:17:15.000 And they'd have cash.
01:17:16.000 They'd get only cash.
01:17:17.000 They didn't have credit card machines.
01:17:19.000 So if you got a guy at 2 o'clock in the morning and that guy had been on his shift since 6 p.m., you knew that dude had a lot of money on him.
01:17:27.000 And so they were murdering gypsy cab drivers at a crazy rate. 0.97
01:17:31.000 Like, find...
01:17:32.000 Google that. 0.99
01:17:33.000 That sucks. 0.99
01:17:34.000 You already did that? 0.99
01:17:35.000 Oh, okay.
01:17:36.000 One of the most dangerous jobs in New York, gypsy cab driver. 1.00
01:17:40.000 What year is this from?
01:17:41.000 I couldn't find that, but it says since 1990, 180 drivers.
01:17:45.000 It's two a month.
01:17:45.000 I was trying to do the math on that.
01:17:46.000 Two a month.
01:17:47.000 Yeah.
01:17:48.000 Yeah, I remember one year.
01:17:50.000 I want to say one year.
01:17:51.000 It was a high year.
01:17:52.000 It was like 48 dudes had been killed.
01:17:54.000 It was crazy. 1.00
01:17:57.000 Damn. 1.00
01:17:59.000 Yeah, it's horrible, man. 1.00
01:18:01.000 But I remember cabs were really scared to pick people up.
01:18:05.000 They'd look at you, look at you up and down.
01:18:09.000 Is that why...
01:18:11.000 When was this?
01:18:12.000 Like in the 90s?
01:18:13.000 This must have been in the 90s, yeah.
01:18:14.000 Two a month, that's 90 months.
01:18:16.000 Yeah, well, when I was living there, it was the 90s, so that's when I remember.
01:18:20.000 Is that why they really don't pick up certain people, like, you know, like, black man can't get your cap, like, type... 0.95
01:18:27.000 I think it's probably more racism than that.
01:18:30.000 But it's also like if you are around friends that have been robbed and you're scared and you hear about these people being murdered.
01:18:40.000 When you think about a cab driver, you never know.
01:18:46.000 You're opening your door and they're behind you.
01:18:49.000 You have no idea who they are.
01:18:51.000 There's no metal detector.
01:18:53.000 They could have a gun.
01:18:54.000 They could have a knife.
01:18:55.000 Or it could be Ben Bailey.
01:18:56.000 Yeah.
01:18:57.000 You can win a thousand dollars.
01:18:59.000 Yeah.
01:18:59.000 Or it could be Patrick Bateman.
01:19:01.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:19:02.000 Someone could fucking kill you for no reason. 1.00
01:19:04.000 Just for a fun. 1.00
01:19:05.000 Yeah.
01:19:06.000 For a fun time.
01:19:07.000 Yeah.
01:19:08.000 Dude.
01:19:08.000 It's a hard job, man.
01:19:10.000 Because you're just taking a chance.
01:19:11.000 I used to drive limos.
01:19:13.000 And when I drove limos, it was like sometimes you would drive people and they'd be really cool.
01:19:17.000 And sometimes you drive people and you get really creeped out, man.
01:19:20.000 I just really creeped out. 0.99
01:19:22.000 Some creepy shit happened to you? 0.99
01:19:23.000 No, nothing happened to me, but people would yell at you, and you're like, Jesus, man, I'm a human being. 1.00
01:19:28.000 You don't even know me.
01:19:29.000 Yeah.
01:19:30.000 You're yelling at me.
01:19:31.000 Yeah.
01:19:32.000 I remember one time some old dude yelled at me, and I yelled back at him.
01:19:35.000 And there was him and some young dude in the car, and they panicked. 0.99
01:19:39.000 I'm like, listen, man, I'll quit this fucking job. 0.99
01:19:41.000 Yo. 1.00
01:19:42.000 Shut the fuck up. 1.00
01:19:43.000 Don't yell at me. 1.00
01:19:46.000 Isn't there a thing where, maybe I heard it in a rap song, but people are putting drugs in the backseat of an Uber and taking it to a location, sending it to a certain location?
01:19:58.000 Oh, for sure.
01:19:58.000 Yeah, for sure.
01:19:59.000 Oh.
01:20:00.000 Yeah, yeah, definitely.
01:20:00.000 That's creative.
01:20:01.000 Yeah, that's definitely happened.
01:20:03.000 100%.
01:20:04.000 Yeah, especially if you tell the Uber driver, you know, hey, here's an extra whatever for you.
01:20:09.000 Yeah.
01:20:09.000 Just drive this, man.
01:20:11.000 It's real easy. 0.99
01:20:12.000 You don't have to do shit. 0.99
01:20:13.000 I'm going to tip you. 0.99
01:20:14.000 I'm going to tip you.
01:20:15.000 Yeah, but especially given cash.
01:20:17.000 Yeah.
01:20:18.000 The Uber driver doesn't have any idea what's in the bag.
01:20:21.000 Yeah.
01:20:22.000 They're like, okay.
01:20:23.000 Yeah.
01:20:24.000 It's like they have Uber Eats.
01:20:26.000 Do you like that Uber Eats? 1.00
01:20:27.000 No, I don't fuck with that. 1.00
01:20:29.000 I don't like that shit either. 1.00
01:20:30.000 I don't trust anybody to not eat my food. 1.00
01:20:32.000 Pick at your fries and shit. 1.00
01:20:34.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:20:35.000 Spit in your burger. 1.00
01:20:36.000 And the idea of this motherfucker getting out of the car in regular clothes. 1.00
01:20:41.000 Like, he's not... 1.00
01:20:42.000 But... 0.87
01:20:43.000 Listen, if it's from a reputable company and they seal the bag and everything, like Postmates and shit like that, it's a great deal. 0.93
01:20:50.000 You don't want to live, especially during the pandemic, you don't want to leave your house. 0.89
01:20:55.000 But I just know people that have gotten food that someone's eaten.
01:21:00.000 Yeah?
01:21:01.000 Yeah.
01:21:02.000 I don't like the idea of waiting for somebody to drop off my food.
01:21:06.000 I'm like, I gotta go get it.
01:21:07.000 I'm a hunter.
01:21:10.000 I gotta go get it.
01:21:11.000 But if you're lazy and you just want them to just door dash it over to you.
01:21:15.000 Yeah.
01:21:17.000 It's weird.
01:21:18.000 It's like, listen, if you get a restaurant to deliver your food straight from the restaurant, the benefit is the restaurant doesn't lose all that money.
01:21:26.000 And one of the things that John Terzian and Craig were saying when they were on the podcast was like, they have a margin of profit.
01:21:33.000 Their profit margin is like 18%.
01:21:35.000 So that means that they need to make more than that in order to have any profit, right?
01:21:41.000 With the amount of expenses it costs to make the food and hire the staff and pay for the space that they work in.
01:21:48.000 Well, when you do Uber Eats, you lose money.
01:21:51.000 So when these restaurants are selling food through Uber Eats and through DoorDash, they're losing money because it costs more for them to make the food and then have it delivered.
01:22:03.000 But they're just trying to keep their customer base.
01:22:05.000 They're just trying to stay afloat.
01:22:08.000 Maybe they're losing a little bit of money, but at least they're keeping everybody employed and they've got their business rolling.
01:22:18.000 You know, and their idea is that, listen, we just want everybody to be happy.
01:22:23.000 This is what we do.
01:22:23.000 We make food for people.
01:22:24.000 We want to make food for people.
01:22:25.000 But if you could have the food delivered by the restaurant itself, you can call the restaurant.
01:22:31.000 If they have delivery, it's way better for the restaurant.
01:22:33.000 It's way better for the consumer because you're building a relationship with the people that run the restaurant and a lot of times it's actually the servers.
01:22:41.000 Like at Craig's, the servers themselves have been delivering food for people because they have very valuable customers.
01:22:48.000 Maybe they've been coming to that restaurant for years and they'll deliver your, you know, you order some chicken parmesan, they'll deliver it.
01:22:55.000 You're like, Mario!
01:22:57.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:22:58.000 You know?
01:22:58.000 What do you think about these bird scooters?
01:23:00.000 What do you think about the bird scooter game?
01:23:01.000 I think it's a good way to die when you're drunk.
01:23:03.000 Watch these people in Austin.
01:23:05.000 They're driving around in these rickety scooters.
01:23:07.000 There's two people on a scooter and they're hammered. 1.00
01:23:10.000 And I'm like, you guys are gonna break your fucking shins. 1.00
01:23:14.000 Jamie's nodding. 0.99
01:23:15.000 The thing I don't like about them is that people treat them so bad they leave them anywhere.
01:23:18.000 Oh, yeah.
01:23:19.000 They're rickety.
01:23:20.000 Yeah, I think it's...
01:23:21.000 I don't know.
01:23:22.000 We have a sponsor.
01:23:24.000 What is the sponsor?
01:23:25.000 Unagi.
01:23:25.000 Unagi Scooters is one of our sponsors, and they gave me one of them.
01:23:28.000 It is the shit. 1.00
01:23:29.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:23:30.000 That thing is... 1.00
01:23:31.000 They're fun as fuck. 1.00
01:23:31.000 Bad ass. 1.00
01:23:32.000 It flies, and my daughter had one. 0.98
01:23:35.000 They sent it to me, and I let my daughter use it, and she's flying down my driveway with it. 0.98
01:23:40.000 I'm like, that thing is fucking fast. 0.96
01:23:41.000 It's like a bird scooter? 0.98
01:23:42.000 It's just a really high-end scooter.
01:23:45.000 It's like a really high-end electrical scooter.
01:23:47.000 You give it a little bit of a push, like it's just sitting there, but if you just give it a little bit of a push, it takes off, man.
01:23:55.000 You can control the speed and everything like that, and it's got brakes, but... 0.89
01:23:58.000 So my daughter used that, and then she went and rented one of the scooters that they had in downtown Austin, and this is this janky, rickety fucking thing that had been beaten up, and they had been jumping over cones with it, 0.64
01:24:14.000 and it's like, oh my god, this thing is barely hanging on. 0.70
01:24:17.000 No one's running around there and torquing down all the bolts and making sure that everything's in alignment.
01:24:22.000 Yeah, no, no. 0.99
01:24:23.000 Those things that, those, I mean, yeah, and they treat those damn Lime scooters so disrespectful, dude. 1.00
01:24:28.000 Like, I've seen them in bushes and shit. 0.99
01:24:30.000 Like, who did that? 1.00
01:24:32.000 Drunks.
01:24:32.000 Like, it's a drunk way of, too lazy to walk.
01:24:36.000 Like, I want to get there quicker.
01:24:39.000 Yeah.
01:24:39.000 So you just get on that scooter and...
01:24:45.000 I want one.
01:24:46.000 Well, they're trying to do that with a lot of things now, where you just use your phone, and then you can pick up a car.
01:24:52.000 They're doing that with cars, where they have cars laying around.
01:24:55.000 You also...
01:24:56.000 Cars?
01:24:57.000 Yeah, cars.
01:24:58.000 Yeah.
01:24:59.000 I don't know what the company's doing it, but there's apps where they leave cars laying around for you, and you could use your app, and your app will unlock the car, and you could just drive the car.
01:25:10.000 That sounds too much like bait car. 0.99
01:25:12.000 I'm like, nah, I take this shit. 1.00
01:25:14.000 Somebody go, pfft. 1.00
01:25:15.000 Well, not only that, like, who's doing that?
01:25:16.000 And are you testing them?
01:25:18.000 Like, maybe they should have, like, one of them.
01:25:19.000 I had a buddy of mine who got arrested for DUI, and he had, like, a little tube that he had to blow into before he could start his car.
01:25:26.000 So it took, like, he couldn't ever run away from you.
01:25:29.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:25:29.000 Because it would take, like, five minutes for him to start his car.
01:25:32.000 Yeah.
01:25:32.000 So he would get in his car, he'd have to blow on the tube, it would register, it would take a little bit of time, and then it would give him a green light, and then he could drive off.
01:25:40.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:25:40.000 That's what you need if you're going to have an app where people can just pick up a car.
01:25:44.000 What I don't like about them scooters either is that you actually need a driver's... 0.99
01:25:47.000 They make you have a valid driver's license to work those motherfuckers. 1.00
01:25:52.000 What? 0.99
01:25:53.000 Yeah.
01:25:53.000 Really?
01:25:54.000 Or at least I tried to start one up in L.A. and my driver's license was suspended at the time. 0.99
01:26:02.000 And then so I was like, what the fuck? 0.98
01:26:05.000 I was like, I don't know. 0.99
01:26:07.000 That might be a California thing. 0.77
01:26:08.000 Yeah.
01:26:09.000 The regulations here are very different.
01:26:11.000 Oh, okay.
01:26:11.000 Like, for instance, if you moved here, I could just give you a gun.
01:26:14.000 Really?
01:26:15.000 Yep.
01:26:15.000 I'd go to Austin.
01:26:16.000 Jamar, have a gun.
01:26:17.000 And you'd have a fresh, brand new gun.
01:26:20.000 You wouldn't have to do any paperwork.
01:26:22.000 Nothing.
01:26:22.000 Really?
01:26:23.000 You could just give me a Glock?
01:26:24.000 Dude, I've been here.
01:26:25.000 Eight people are giving me guns.
01:26:26.000 What?
01:26:27.000 Eight. 1.00
01:26:28.000 Damn. 1.00
01:26:29.000 Yeah, eight guns. 1.00
01:26:30.000 I don't know if I can handle a gun.
01:26:32.000 You don't think so?
01:26:33.000 No, I mean, like...
01:26:35.000 Have you shot a gun before?
01:26:36.000 No.
01:26:37.000 Nah, but when I was seven, this nigga named Peanut let me hold his gun in the hood. 1.00
01:26:45.000 Peanut! 0.98
01:26:46.000 And I was like, it was a seven.
01:26:49.000 I was like, this is so heavy.
01:26:51.000 Heavy, right?
01:26:52.000 Thank you, Peanut.
01:26:53.000 Well, we're out here.
01:26:54.000 I'll take you to the range.
01:26:56.000 All right.
01:26:56.000 There's a place called the range.
01:26:58.000 Indoor gun range.
01:26:59.000 It's great.
01:26:59.000 All right.
01:27:00.000 Yeah. 0.82
01:27:01.000 How am I going to feel after I shoot this gun, Joe? 0.58
01:27:03.000 You'll be fine. 0.92
01:27:04.000 All right.
01:27:04.000 You wear headphones, so you block out the sound.
01:27:07.000 You wear glasses.
01:27:09.000 Alright. 1.00
01:27:09.000 Damn. 1.00
01:27:11.000 You just need to learn how to do it correctly. 1.00
01:27:14.000 Yeah.
01:27:14.000 Bang, bang.
01:27:15.000 It's fine.
01:27:15.000 I want to hold it like this.
01:27:19.000 It's very bad for your accuracy.
01:27:21.000 It's the Compton Wave.
01:27:21.000 You don't really want to hold it one hand either.
01:27:24.000 No.
01:27:24.000 It's not.
01:27:25.000 It's hard to control it.
01:27:27.000 Why do people hold the gun this way?
01:27:29.000 It looks cool.
01:27:29.000 Yeah, it is.
01:27:30.000 It is.
01:27:30.000 It looks cool to go sideways like that.
01:27:31.000 It's like a minister society shit. 1.00
01:27:33.000 Yeah, like you don't give a fuck. 1.00
01:27:34.000 I'm so crazy. 0.99
01:27:36.000 How am I... How come no one's doing it upside down?
01:27:38.000 Oh, right, right, right, right. 0.99
01:27:39.000 Anybody doing next level shit? 0.99
01:27:41.000 Or anybody doing it that way? 0.99
01:27:43.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 0.99
01:27:43.000 That's why you really don't give a fuck about a bunny. 0.99
01:27:46.000 You don't care about somebody? 0.99
01:27:47.000 You're going to handle up.
01:27:49.000 Isn't there a thing about somebody shooting a gun like this? 0.97
01:27:52.000 Kind of like trying to curve the bullet or some shit like that? 0.96
01:27:56.000 Oh, well, that doesn't work. 0.96
01:27:57.000 Like a tennis ball?
01:27:58.000 Angelina Jolie movie.
01:28:00.000 Oh, that's what I saw it in Wanted.
01:28:02.000 I saw it in Wanted.
01:28:03.000 I was like, does that really work?
01:28:05.000 Is that her and Brad Pitt?
01:28:06.000 Yeah.
01:28:06.000 Is that when they met?
01:28:07.000 It's just him.
01:28:08.000 It's just her.
01:28:08.000 Just her?
01:28:09.000 What was the movie Mr. and Mrs. Jones or something like that?
01:28:12.000 Mrs. Smith.
01:28:13.000 Mrs. Smith.
01:28:14.000 Yeah, that's sad.
01:28:15.000 Yeah.
01:28:15.000 That makes me sad.
01:28:16.000 Are they still together?
01:28:17.000 No.
01:28:17.000 No, that led to the adoption of a lot of children.
01:28:20.000 Bro, she took in so many kids.
01:28:23.000 Well, you know, listen.
01:28:25.000 That's what's up.
01:28:26.000 It's great that she does that.
01:28:28.000 Yeah, I respect that.
01:28:28.000 That's not what's sad.
01:28:29.000 What's sad is that her and Brad didn't make it.
01:28:32.000 How long was they together?
01:28:33.000 A long time, like 10 years.
01:28:35.000 Can I ask you this?
01:28:36.000 Like, do they...
01:28:37.000 Okay, since those kids are adopted, does she keep them kids? 1.00
01:28:41.000 Does he still go see them kids? 0.99
01:28:42.000 Bitch, you brought them kids over here. 1.00
01:28:44.000 I do not know. 1.00
01:28:45.000 I don't know the specifics.
01:28:47.000 But I do know there's...
01:28:50.000 There's a rule.
01:28:51.000 You know, there's like rules of like physics.
01:28:53.000 There's rules of science.
01:28:54.000 There's a rule. 1.00
01:28:56.000 Crazy Pussy is the best pussy. 1.00
01:28:59.000 It is. 1.00
01:28:59.000 It's the best pussy. 1.00
01:29:00.000 It is. 1.00
01:29:01.000 She's clearly crazy. 0.99
01:29:02.000 It is. 0.99
01:29:03.000 It's gotta be off the charts.
01:29:04.000 She's so pretty.
01:29:06.000 Yeah, I mean, she's so talented.
01:29:07.000 She got fat lips. 0.69
01:29:10.000 She's like, spit on me cute. 1.00
01:29:13.000 They're ridiculous lips. 1.00
01:29:14.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:29:15.000 Like, all those crazy girls that stuff shit into their lips, they could only wish they had lips like her. 1.00
01:29:21.000 Let me see those lips, Jamie. 1.00
01:29:23.000 Pull up them lips.
01:29:24.000 Angelina, pull up them lips. 1.00
01:29:26.000 Pull up them Angelina Jolie lips.
01:29:28.000 They're outrageous. 1.00
01:29:29.000 I was talking about this shit. 1.00
01:29:32.000 They were so pretty. 1.00
01:29:33.000 Yeah, I was talking about this shit to the homie the other day. 1.00
01:29:37.000 I was like, damn, boy. 1.00
01:29:39.000 Let me get a younger Angelina Jolie. 1.00
01:29:41.000 Is that a real one?
01:29:44.000 Bell's palsy.
01:29:45.000 She's got Bell's palsy? 0.95
01:29:47.000 That's the problem with crazy, too. 0.85
01:29:49.000 That's the problem with crazy. 1.00
01:29:50.000 Crazy comes with all sorts of neurotic shit. 1.00
01:29:53.000 She bad, though. 1.00
01:29:54.000 Oh, she's so pretty.
01:29:55.000 And her dad, rather, her dad is one of the greatest actors ever.
01:29:59.000 Jon Voight? 1.00
01:30:00.000 Jon Voight's out of his fucking mind. 1.00
01:30:01.000 Oh, that's her dad? 1.00
01:30:02.000 Yeah, that's her dad.
01:30:03.000 Yeah, they would talk on the phone.
01:30:05.000 This is allegedly, I read this in a story.
01:30:07.000 They would talk on the phone in character.
01:30:12.000 Like, say, if she was playing a British soldier and he was playing a guy from Ireland, they would talk on the phone in character.
01:30:20.000 Really?
01:30:21.000 They'd pretend they were these people.
01:30:24.000 That's dope, so that means he was kind of like conditioning or molding her.
01:30:28.000 Well, I think they were both adults at the time.
01:30:30.000 Both playing make-believe over the phone.
01:30:33.000 Yo! 1.00
01:30:34.000 It's very strange. 1.00
01:30:35.000 Did she used to make out with her brother and shit on the red carpet or some shit like that? 1.00
01:30:38.000 She kissed her brother on the lips on the red carpet. 1.00
01:30:42.000 Damn, she nasty. 1.00
01:30:43.000 I mean, if it's like a little peck that you give your mom, I kiss my mom on the lips. 1.00
01:30:49.000 I never kiss my sister on the lips. 1.00
01:30:51.000 Fuck. 1.00
01:30:51.000 And I love my sister. 1.00
01:30:52.000 I love my sister too.
01:30:54.000 I don't believe I kiss her on the lips either. 1.00
01:30:55.000 Fuck that. 1.00
01:30:56.000 I mean, I have for sure. 1.00
01:30:58.000 You know, tell her I love her.
01:30:59.000 But I think that was a little different.
01:31:01.000 I think the Angelina Jolie one, they held it a little long.
01:31:04.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:31:06.000 It was just long enough to be sexy.
01:31:08.000 It was long enough where everybody got super uncomfortable.
01:31:11.000 Like, hey!
01:31:13.000 But her dad, Jon Voight, is like a full-on Trump supporter.
01:31:18.000 Really?
01:31:19.000 Oh, yeah.
01:31:20.000 He's one of the weirdest Republican Hollywood types.
01:31:25.000 When you hear him talk about conservative values, you're like, this is something else going on here.
01:31:31.000 This is not as simple as this guy is a conservative.
01:31:35.000 There's some crazy that's coming out through this ideology that he's got.
01:31:40.000 Yeah.
01:31:40.000 Have you ever heard him talk?
01:31:41.000 No.
01:31:42.000 Have you ever seen Midnight Cowboy?
01:31:44.000 There he is.
01:31:45.000 Let me hear some of this.
01:31:46.000 This is her dad.
01:31:46.000 Let me hear some of this.
01:31:47.000 We all sit with hope.
01:31:49.000 We sit with a prayer.
01:31:50.000 My fellow patriots of the USA, how can I begin?
01:31:54.000 We've spoken about, many times, deceit, lies, corruption, and karmic law.
01:32:00.000 You all may well ask, why hasn't God done what was asked of him?
01:32:04.000 And I'll tell you why.
01:32:06.000 He has a plan greater than anyone who asks.
01:32:09.000 My fellow Americans, this is the beginning of many disappointments that this administration will bring to this nation.
01:32:16.000 Yes, we all know.
01:32:18.000 But now what?
01:32:19.000 That's what we all ask.
01:32:21.000 Now what?
01:32:22.000 We see the lie already, our soldiers being mistreated, these men sacrificing with blood, sweat and tears to protect, and what do they get?
01:32:31.000 No need to say.
01:32:32.000 We all know.
01:32:33.000 We know.
01:32:34.000 I will not sit here and talk about the left because I have.
01:32:40.000 And we know very well that the left are against the greatness that was and that has left.
01:32:46.000 We all know Trump's love for our country and its people.
01:32:50.000 He wanted greatness.
01:32:52.000 And now we are losing a great accomplishment.
01:32:56.000 We all want to know now.
01:32:58.000 What now?
01:33:00.000 What?
01:33:01.000 Okay.
01:33:02.000 I get it.
01:33:03.000 I get it.
01:33:04.000 He's gone, right?
01:33:07.000 There's something going on there.
01:33:08.000 Even the way he's talking.
01:33:10.000 I gotta pee.
01:33:11.000 Go ahead.
01:33:12.000 I didn't know.
01:33:13.000 I was like, I gotta pee.
01:33:16.000 Perfect timing.
01:33:18.000 See you in a minute.
01:33:20.000 I mean, you watch that video.
01:33:23.000 Like, what does that even mean?
01:33:24.000 That the soldiers being mistreated, like, instantaneously?
01:33:26.000 Like, Joe Biden takes office.
01:33:28.000 Kamala Harris is vice president.
01:33:30.000 And immediately, what are they doing?
01:33:31.000 They're peeing on soldiers?
01:33:32.000 Like, what is happening?
01:33:34.000 What is he saying?
01:33:36.000 Like, we all know.
01:33:37.000 Like, it's just...
01:33:40.000 I wonder what happens when you get that old.
01:33:42.000 I really do. 0.94
01:33:44.000 Because I know I'm definitely dumber than I was like 20 years ago. 0.96
01:33:47.000 I think. 0.98
01:33:48.000 Sometimes I'm not.
01:33:49.000 Like I have two alpha brains in a bottle of water and I feel like I got it back again.
01:33:54.000 But for sure, my memory is like at least a small percentage has deteriorated.
01:34:02.000 And I wonder...
01:34:04.000 How much of that memory deteriorating is because of just the sheer amount of information that I have in my head?
01:34:12.000 I don't think people are supposed to be talking to people four or five days a week, three hours at a time, about science and psychology and history and all the different things that I'm doing.
01:34:23.000 I feel like my brain is overwhelmed.
01:34:26.000 I don't know if my brain is capable of all that.
01:34:30.000 So I wonder.
01:34:31.000 I was just talking about what happens.
01:34:33.000 Jamar's back.
01:34:34.000 Pee quick. 0.59
01:34:34.000 You pee quick, bro. 0.59
01:34:35.000 Had to.
01:34:36.000 Force it out.
01:34:37.000 I was saying, I wonder what happens to old dudes that they get that old. 0.71
01:34:42.000 My memory is definitely slightly less good than it was, unless I take a couple of alpha brains. 0.99
01:34:49.000 That shit really worked? 0.99
01:34:50.000 Oh yeah, for sure. 1.00
01:34:51.000 Yeah, I keep them right here, man.
01:34:53.000 Oh, this is empty.
01:34:55.000 I take two of them in a bottle of water.
01:34:58.000 Anytime I talk to a scientist or any kind of intellectual, I'll take two of those.
01:35:03.000 These are the alpha brain instants.
01:35:05.000 What is it doing exactly?
01:35:08.000 Well, what it does, what it's been clinically shown, this is Blackberry Lemonade.
01:35:16.000 What it's been shown to do, they had two double-blind, placebo-controlled studies from the Boston Center for Memory, and it showed that it increased your verbal memory, meaning your ability to pull up words, your ability to form sentences,
01:35:33.000 it increased your I think it was your reaction time, and then the other one was alpha flow state. 0.90
01:35:42.000 If you go to Onnit.com, you can read all that shit. 0.96
01:35:45.000 But what it does for me is, for sure, it feels like it makes my brain fire smoother. 0.98
01:35:50.000 And I don't struggle as much to form sentences.
01:35:53.000 I don't struggle as much to pull up words.
01:35:56.000 How long does it last?
01:35:57.000 A few hours. 1.00
01:35:58.000 Oh, shit. 1.00
01:35:59.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:36:00.000 I'm going to leave with some of that.
01:36:01.000 I got something.
01:36:02.000 The vending machine, it's all free.
01:36:06.000 Just press buttons.
01:36:06.000 You can get whatever you want.
01:36:07.000 Get your alpha brain.
01:36:09.000 There's those warrior bars.
01:36:10.000 I saw you posted about the lion's mane.
01:36:16.000 Yes. 1.00
01:36:17.000 I saw you post about that, and I was like, let me go get that shit. 1.00
01:36:20.000 And then I got it. 0.99
01:36:22.000 And I was like, all right, Joe.
01:36:23.000 I even tagged you.
01:36:24.000 I was like, all right, Joe. 1.00
01:36:25.000 I said, we're going to see what the fuck you're talking about. 1.00
01:36:27.000 And I've taken it. 0.99
01:36:29.000 I mean, I don't know if it works, but I'm like, if y'all say it's healthy, you know what I'm saying?
01:36:35.000 Like, I take pills and shit like that, like, do my vitamins. 0.65
01:36:37.000 So if y'all say it's healthy, I'm out here. 0.89
01:36:40.000 It's one of those things where some people say, like, oh, vitamins don't do anything for you.
01:36:44.000 But those people are never athletes.
01:36:46.000 The people that are athletes, they all take vitamins.
01:36:48.000 Because you really do feel it over a long period of time.
01:36:51.000 You need something, and I take something called Athletic Greens, which is a simple powder, a super greens powder that I mix in a bottle of water, and it's filled with vitamins and nutrients.
01:37:03.000 And I also take quercetin and vitamin C and vitamin D. What is that?
01:37:08.000 What is Shilajit?
01:37:10.000 I read about it online.
01:37:12.000 I think Bruce Lee used to take it or something like that.
01:37:16.000 I don't know, but I read that Bruce Lee used to take it, and it basically does this stuff.
01:37:23.000 How do you spell it?
01:37:24.000 Oh, it's Sheila G. S-H-I... L-I-G-J-I-T or something like that. 0.99
01:37:31.000 Really? 1.00
01:37:32.000 Sheila G. Sheila G. That shit is great. 1.00
01:37:37.000 I never ever know what these pills are doing, but I do feel sharper when I take them. 1.00
01:37:42.000 Really?
01:37:42.000 I'd rather take pills.
01:37:44.000 I'd rather take healthy pills and shit like that and not know the effects, but just know that it's... 0.98
01:37:52.000 You get what I'm trying to say? 0.98
01:37:53.000 I know what you're saying.
01:37:54.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:37:55.000 It's not instantaneous results with vitamins, but if you are consistent and you take them over long periods of time, you will have better health.
01:38:04.000 It's just how it is.
01:38:05.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:38:06.000 I mean, that's why I take them.
01:38:10.000 It's not drugs.
01:38:12.000 Yeah.
01:38:15.000 No, listen, vitamins are, your body has a whole system, right?
01:38:20.000 Your biological system requires a bunch of different nutrients for it to function at its optimal level.
01:38:27.000 And most people are not getting all of those nutrients from food.
01:38:32.000 It'd be so hard to get it from food.
01:38:34.000 You should eat healthy.
01:38:35.000 You should get most of it from food, but you should also get as much as you can from supplements to optimize all your levels.
01:38:41.000 So fish oil is a must for me.
01:38:44.000 Vitamin D, D3 is a must for me.
01:38:48.000 Zinc, magnesium, all these different minerals and nutrients.
01:38:53.000 Here's what I'm still trying to figure out about vitamins. 0.93
01:38:58.000 I got a medicine cabinet full of good shit or whatever, but do I take two at a time or do I take them all together? 0.97
01:39:09.000 We definitely have to take them with food. 0.99
01:39:11.000 Almost everything, vitamin-wise, needs to be absorbed with fat.
01:39:16.000 Most vitamins.
01:39:17.000 Most of them.
01:39:17.000 Do you take all your vitamins together or do you do them like two at a time?
01:39:20.000 I take vitamins twice a day and I take them with my meals.
01:39:24.000 I usually only eat twice a day.
01:39:25.000 I usually have a morning workout and then I eat around 11 o'clock and then around then is when I have my vitamins with my food and then I have it at night again.
01:39:36.000 I have a different pack of vitamins that I take at night.
01:39:39.000 How long do you work out?
01:39:40.000 How long are your sessions?
01:39:41.000 Depends on what I'm doing.
01:39:42.000 If I'm doing hard cardio, it's never more than an hour.
01:39:45.000 But if I'm doing weightlifting, I like to do it long and I like to give myself a lot of time in between sets.
01:39:53.000 Do you know who Pavel Tatsulin is?
01:39:57.000 He's a Russian kettlebell instructor.
01:39:59.000 He brought kettlebells over here to America.
01:40:02.000 They call him the godfather of Russian kettlebells.
01:40:05.000 But he has this principle that They call it greasing the groove.
01:40:11.000 And the idea behind it is one of the best ways to develop strength is not to work to failure with each set.
01:40:18.000 Let's look at it this way.
01:40:19.000 Say if you want to do a clean and a press, right?
01:40:21.000 And if you do this with, say, 70 pounds.
01:40:24.000 And if you do it with 70 pounds, and you can do 15. Instead of doing 15 presses, that's like your max when you get to 15. Instead of doing that...
01:40:34.000 Do it with eight.
01:40:35.000 Just do it like half.
01:40:37.000 Somewhere around half.
01:40:38.000 And that way you do it easy.
01:40:40.000 So it's easy to do.
01:40:41.000 And then let it sit and then take a long time in between sets.
01:40:45.000 And then do another one.
01:40:47.000 And do another one.
01:40:47.000 Do another one.
01:40:48.000 Do another one.
01:40:49.000 But give yourself like ten minutes in between sets.
01:40:51.000 And the idea is that you let your muscles fully recover and then you do more work that way.
01:40:57.000 So because your muscles fully recover, if you just did, say if you only gave yourself, like a lot of people, they want to go real hard.
01:41:12.000 Mm-hmm.
01:41:27.000 The most important thing is the amount of repetitions that you do with the weight.
01:41:31.000 It's not how many do in a row.
01:41:33.000 So if you can only do, say, ten repetitions, don't do ten.
01:41:38.000 Do five.
01:41:39.000 And then back off when you're fine.
01:41:42.000 You could keep going, but you stop at 5. Let it sit a long time for 10 minutes, whatever, and then do another 5. Let it sit, do another 10 minutes, do another 5. And this way, you're going to get a lot of repetitions in.
01:41:56.000 So you might get 20, 30 reps.
01:42:00.000 Repetitions in.
01:42:01.000 Whereas if you just wanted to go straight in a row, you would do ten, and then you would do eight, and then you would do five, and then you would be burnt out.
01:42:08.000 Your arms would be killing you.
01:42:09.000 This way, you're doing it slow over a long period of time, but you're actually getting in more repetitions.
01:42:15.000 And you're not getting as sore in between sets.
01:42:18.000 You're not getting as beat up.
01:42:19.000 And then your body is able to recover from this more easily.
01:42:24.000 And by doing it that way, and he even would recommend maybe do a couple sets in the morning and then a couple sets in the evening.
01:42:32.000 The idea is that like, you know, like farmer strength. 0.99
01:42:36.000 Farmers are always like chucking hay barrels and shit. 0.99
01:42:39.000 But farmers don't work to exhaustion. 1.00
01:42:41.000 They don't ever work to failure.
01:42:43.000 They don't ever pick up so many bales of hay they can't pick up another bale of hay. 0.58
01:42:46.000 They work all throughout the day and they develop this ridiculous strength because of that.
01:42:51.000 Yeah, see, I don't, um, I don't, um, I don't, like, bench press.
01:42:55.000 Like, I don't, I don't lift, like, I do, I do, like, a lot of free weights.
01:42:59.000 Like, a lot of, like, um, like, a lot of, like, uh, dumbbells and shit like that. 1.00
01:43:03.000 But not, like, the motherfuckers be, like, five, the motherfuckers be, like, five pounds and shit. 1.00
01:43:08.000 But I'd be, like, you know, I, like, do this shit, like, uh, like, maybe for, like, three minutes or some shit like that. 1.00
01:43:13.000 And I do little shit like that. 0.99
01:43:15.000 But I don't, I don't, I don't go big. 0.99
01:43:16.000 Because I don't, I don't want to be, I don't want to be big.
01:43:19.000 I like being, like, Slim and lean, but like...
01:43:22.000 Move fast.
01:43:23.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 0.97
01:43:25.000 And I do fucking weird... 0.86
01:43:29.000 I do a lot of core workout, too. 0.91
01:43:32.000 But I work with the...
01:43:34.000 It's like a bar or whatever. 0.98
01:43:36.000 You know how you hang on a bar to stretch your muscles and shit like that? 0.98
01:43:38.000 I do a lot of that, and then I turn my legs and shit like that. 0.98
01:43:43.000 Oh, okay. 1.00
01:43:43.000 Like those bar stars type shit. 1.00
01:43:45.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 1.00
01:43:46.000 I saw...
01:43:47.000 Those guys are the most jacked.
01:43:48.000 Yeah. 0.94
01:43:49.000 Except their legs. 0.99
01:43:50.000 They always have these little skinny ass legs because they're not really lifting weights. 1.00
01:43:53.000 Bro, I just started working on my legs. 0.98
01:43:56.000 Did you see those bar stars guys? 0.98
01:43:58.000 They all have ridiculous shoulders and traps and arms and thighs and toothpicks and sweatpants. 1.00
01:44:04.000 Legs are like a compass and shit. 1.00
01:44:05.000 Those dudes are always wearing sweatpants. 0.99
01:44:09.000 And it makes it easier to stick your legs straight up in the air while you're doing chin-ups because your legs don't wear anything.
01:44:14.000 Yeah, see, I do the weight vest.
01:44:16.000 Oh, look at you.
01:44:17.000 Look at you.
01:44:18.000 With the Tims on and the weights.
01:44:21.000 You wear Tims in the weight room.
01:44:23.000 I like it.
01:44:24.000 And those are ankle weights, too.
01:44:26.000 Oh, nice.
01:44:26.000 Oh, that's a great way to work out.
01:44:28.000 Yeah.
01:44:28.000 That's phenomenal.
01:44:29.000 So it makes your foot work like it helps with footwork and shit, too. 1.00
01:44:33.000 Fuck yeah. 1.00
01:44:34.000 Do you have a trainer? 1.00
01:44:35.000 Do you work with anybody? 1.00
01:44:36.000 Nah, I go in there and just make shit up. 0.99
01:44:39.000 You should talk to somebody, or you don't even have to talk to somebody, but just do some research. 0.99
01:44:44.000 Just do some YouTube videos and shit like that. 0.70
01:44:47.000 You almost like... 0.70
01:44:48.000 You don't need a trainer, but it's a great tool.
01:44:52.000 But you can get a lot of information just for free off of YouTube.
01:44:57.000 Yeah.
01:44:57.000 All kinds of different workouts, but you just want to make sure you don't hurt yourself.
01:45:01.000 See this?
01:45:02.000 You just said something interesting, right?
01:45:04.000 You see this one?
01:45:05.000 Yeah.
01:45:06.000 Right.
01:45:06.000 Okay.
01:45:08.000 So that, right? 0.99
01:45:09.000 Bro, I was doing that shit with a 45, and I went too hard, and I... Pulled something? 0.99
01:45:18.000 I did a thing.
01:45:19.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 0.99
01:45:20.000 I'm 100% again, but I pulled some shit. 0.99
01:45:22.000 I was like, what is it? 0.99
01:45:24.000 What is it?
01:45:25.000 Is the meat out?
01:45:26.000 I was like, is it...
01:45:27.000 Tell me something, Doc.
01:45:30.000 And they were like, oh, no, you just pulled up.
01:45:32.000 Well, if you work out hard, you can hurt yourself no matter what.
01:45:35.000 Yeah, but you know what?
01:45:36.000 I needed that because then I had to take time off the gym.
01:45:38.000 It's like, yeah, bro, get out of the gym.
01:45:40.000 Yeah, but I see what you're doing there, and that works.
01:45:44.000 That's like the same thing people do with kettlebells.
01:45:46.000 Yeah.
01:45:46.000 Or with, not kettlebells, rather, medicine balls, where they're like slamming them against the wall and slamming them this way against the wall.
01:45:52.000 Yeah.
01:45:52.000 Or, you ever seen that one with the rope that has the ball at the end of it, and they stand by a wall and they do this, boom, boom.
01:45:59.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:46:00.000 Yeah.
01:46:01.000 Bro, you know which one looks crazy, and I'm like, I'm still afraid of it, is the ropes like this.
01:46:05.000 Oh, yeah, those are easy.
01:46:06.000 Is it?
01:46:07.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:46:07.000 They're good.
01:46:08.000 They're good.
01:46:09.000 You can't be afraid of those. 1.00
01:46:11.000 What the fuck are you doing? 0.99
01:46:11.000 Battle ropes? 0.99
01:46:12.000 What are you doing here?
01:46:12.000 Oh, hold on.
01:46:12.000 I'm working on my footwork.
01:46:14.000 I'm working on my footwork because those are ankle weights.
01:46:16.000 What are you doing, Jamar?
01:46:18.000 Hey, look.
01:46:18.000 Oh, my God.
01:46:20.000 You're going to hurt yourself with ankle weights on doing backflips? 1.00
01:46:22.000 I got to be able to do this shit on stage. 1.00
01:46:24.000 I got to be able to move on stage. 1.00
01:46:26.000 How did you learn how to do backflips like that? 0.87
01:46:28.000 I was a ghetto-ass kid from Compton. 0.58
01:46:31.000 So no one taught you how to do it? 0.97
01:46:32.000 You just figured it out yourself?
01:46:33.000 Yeah, I used to watch my big cousin Sean do them, and then I used to try to be like him, and he kind of taught me how to do it. 0.96
01:46:39.000 The thing about backflips is if you fucking miss...
01:46:42.000 No, what I'm afraid to do still is a frontflip. 0.98
01:46:47.000 I've never been... 0.99
01:46:49.000 I did crazy shit, and people... 1.00
01:46:55.000 Look at you! 1.00
01:46:56.000 And Joe, people think that I'm like, I'm just playing, but I am drop dead serious.
01:47:02.000 But it is great for your footwork, though.
01:47:04.000 If you have those ankle weights on, your body gets used to that. 0.98
01:47:06.000 And that's all I'm fucking working on, too. 0.99
01:47:08.000 Look at you! 0.98
01:47:10.000 I'm an Aquarius, so it may be a little unorthodox.
01:47:14.000 Oh, I'm an Aquarius.
01:47:15.000 That's hilarious.
01:47:16.000 But yeah, man, I'd be like, drop dead serious. 0.98
01:47:18.000 I don't fucking know, Joe. 0.91
01:47:19.000 I'm just trying to stay in shape. 0.98
01:47:21.000 I get it.
01:47:21.000 I get it.
01:47:22.000 Listen, you have the motivation.
01:47:24.000 That's it.
01:47:25.000 I'll be trying to have fun at the same time, though, too. 0.92
01:47:27.000 I don't fucking know. 0.68
01:47:29.000 Well, if you come out here, you can just work out at the honor of the gym. 0.98
01:47:33.000 It's right down the street. 1.00
01:47:34.000 Damn it, Joe. 1.00
01:47:34.000 Damn it! 1.00
01:47:35.000 You know I'm coming. 1.00
01:47:37.000 I know you're coming.
01:47:38.000 We gotta get everybody out here.
01:47:40.000 Yeah, man.
01:47:41.000 One of the things that I thought of when I moved here, I was like, I need to make a place where everybody's gonna want to come out here, because I don't think we need to be in L.A. We're in L.A. because we all thought we had to be in L.A. Well, I'm from LA, born and raised, and my family and shit's out there, so I'm like, I've never had to leave my family.
01:47:58.000 Oh, that's different. 0.77
01:48:01.000 There's a crazy-ass thing there, but I can leave.
01:48:07.000 My folks just moved here.
01:48:08.000 Really?
01:48:08.000 Yeah, they just moved here.
01:48:10.000 Fuck, man. 1.00
01:48:13.000 That's great. 1.00
01:48:14.000 Did they move here because of you?
01:48:15.000 Yeah.
01:48:15.000 Well, they didn't move here by accident.
01:48:19.000 I'm trying to make everybody move here, man.
01:48:21.000 All my friends.
01:48:23.000 No, I ain't mad at it.
01:48:24.000 I'm here for a reason.
01:48:26.000 And one of my big missions here is stand-up.
01:48:30.000 I want to make sure that stand-up has a real...
01:48:34.000 Gets real again?
01:48:36.000 Well, it just has a real place where it's safe.
01:48:41.000 Yeah.
01:48:42.000 Like, stand-up is protected.
01:48:43.000 Yeah.
01:48:44.000 You know?
01:48:44.000 We need to be protected.
01:48:45.000 Like, one of the things you realize with COVID, when all these comedy clubs started going under, and all this shit started happening, no one could perform anywhere, like...
01:48:52.000 A lot of comics that have potential, especially young people that are just starting out, they're going to drop off the map and they might not ever do it.
01:49:00.000 I mean, I think about what would happen to me if I was like six months into comedy and then COVID hit and then there was a whole year where I couldn't do stand-up.
01:49:09.000 I might have fallen off.
01:49:10.000 I might have gotten a job.
01:49:12.000 I might have gotten a girl pregnant. 1.00
01:49:14.000 Had a baby and then couldn't do the road. 1.00
01:49:17.000 I was 21, stupid. 1.00
01:49:19.000 Who knows what I would have done? 1.00
01:49:20.000 But join the fucking Marines. 1.00
01:49:22.000 Who knows? 1.00
01:49:23.000 Those fucking thoughts ran through my head when COVID hit, too. 1.00
01:49:25.000 And I'm like, in this bitch. 1.00
01:49:28.000 Well, in the beginning days, right? 0.99
01:49:30.000 I think we can all agree to this.
01:49:32.000 You don't know if you're ever going to make it.
01:49:34.000 And in the beginning days, it's very volatile.
01:49:37.000 It's very dangerous.
01:49:38.000 It could all fall apart on you at any moment.
01:49:40.000 When did you come to L.A.? 1994. How long were you doing comedy?
01:49:45.000 Six years.
01:49:46.000 Oh, okay.
01:49:47.000 Yeah.
01:49:47.000 I was already on a sitcom.
01:49:49.000 I got so lucky.
01:49:50.000 Oh, okay. 1.00
01:49:51.000 I'm the luckiest bitch that's ever lived. 0.99
01:49:53.000 I've always been so lucky. 0.99
01:49:55.000 Really? 0.85
01:49:55.000 Yeah, but I'm so fucking lucky. 0.85
01:49:57.000 Hmm. 1.00
01:49:58.000 That's fucking dope, man. 1.00
01:50:00.000 Yeah, I feel like I must have done some shit in another life. 1.00
01:50:03.000 Yeah. 0.99
01:50:04.000 I must have been a good boy. 0.92
01:50:05.000 It's so funny because it's like when people talk about like, I didn't know if I was going to make it and shit. 0.89
01:50:12.000 It's like, I forgot.
01:50:13.000 At a point in time, I forgot about making it. 0.99
01:50:18.000 I was just out there just because I had some crazy shit to say. 0.54
01:50:22.000 And next thing you know, you're doing alright. 0.98
01:50:24.000 I know, right?
01:50:25.000 But I think, for me, out of sight, out of mind, I just gotta be like, If I don't think about it, like, that's when I'm, like, the best.
01:50:36.000 You know, like, I'm like...
01:50:37.000 Right, right, right.
01:50:38.000 Yeah, like, it'll stress me the fuck out.
01:50:41.000 Yeah, yeah, like, it'll stress me the fuck out if I'm over here. 0.99
01:50:43.000 Like, fuck, man, when am I gonna... 0.98
01:50:44.000 You know, like, back in the days, like, at the... 0.99
01:50:46.000 Like, then you'll get a set like me at the improv. 0.98
01:50:49.000 Like, trying to get fucking shows. 0.95
01:50:52.000 Well, that's the thing, is, like, if you think about it too much, then it gets in the way of your flow. 0.99
01:50:57.000 Yeah.
01:50:59.000 Yeah.
01:51:00.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:51:00.000 Like, I... And I was a...
01:51:02.000 Yeah, and I was, like, a chronic, like, overthinker, and I think that's one of the reasons why, like, earlier in the years, like, I would, like, you know, like, kind of, like, struggle, kind of, sort of.
01:51:14.000 Not, like, comedically. 1.00
01:51:16.000 I was just, like, overthinker and shit like that, but after a while, I was like, man, fuck this shit. 1.00
01:51:21.000 I was like, I can't function like this. 1.00
01:51:22.000 Listen, I'm just gonna have to do this.
01:51:24.000 Yeah.
01:51:24.000 You know?
01:51:25.000 Give me that mohawk.
01:51:26.000 Like, Well, that's one of the good things about things like...
01:51:31.000 Imagine if you got a clean sitcom two years into your comedy.
01:51:35.000 Imagine.
01:51:36.000 What's that like?
01:51:37.000 Imagine CBS came along and said, Jamar, you are the perfect look to be the neighbor in this new sitcom with these two gals, and you're going to be their friend, but you got to be clean. 0.58
01:51:50.000 They told Tim Allen to stop doing stand-up when he was doing Home Improvement.
01:51:54.000 Really?
01:51:55.000 They told him to stop.
01:51:55.000 I need to ask him if that's true.
01:51:58.000 I'm just here spreading propaganda.
01:52:00.000 I'm pretty sure it's true.
01:52:01.000 Yeah. 0.85
01:52:01.000 Because he stopped doing stand-up for a long fucking time, and I believe I read in an article that he was told to stop doing stand-up because his stand-up was too controversial, which is hilarious. 0.85
01:52:11.000 Right, right, right. 0.98
01:52:11.000 Tim Allen. 0.98
01:52:12.000 You see what Bob Saget does?
01:52:14.000 Yes. 1.00
01:52:15.000 Yeah, I'm like, that shit is gnarly. 1.00
01:52:17.000 Yes. 1.00
01:52:18.000 Yes.
01:52:18.000 Another case, right?
01:52:19.000 Yeah.
01:52:20.000 He's on that show.
01:52:21.000 Stuff like that used to scare me, too, because I'm not the cleanest dude. 0.99
01:52:27.000 So I was like, damn, man. 1.00
01:52:29.000 Well, listen, that grandmother's smelly pussy joke could be cleaned up. 1.00
01:52:33.000 You can figure out a way to do that the right way. 1.00
01:52:35.000 Just say vagina. 1.00
01:52:37.000 Imagine if the CBS executive, Jamar, we need to talk to you about this grandmother smelly pussy grades bit you're doing. 1.00
01:52:45.000 Is there a way we can clean that up? 1.00
01:52:46.000 So, yeah, I used to always think about that shit. 0.99
01:52:48.000 So, like, when people would give me opportunity and stuff, I was like, you sure? 1.00
01:52:52.000 Like, have you seen this shit? 0.99
01:52:54.000 I do. 1.00
01:52:55.000 And stuff like that. 1.00
01:52:56.000 Like, That shit don't matter. 1.00
01:52:58.000 They want you. 1.00
01:52:58.000 They just want you or whatever. 1.00
01:53:01.000 But they don't want you to do that joke.
01:53:04.000 So I had to get past that.
01:53:06.000 Well, you know what it is?
01:53:07.000 In the beginning, they can say that.
01:53:09.000 See, once you get to a point where... 0.98
01:53:11.000 If you're Dave Chappelle or something like that, he can do whatever the fuck he wants. 0.89
01:53:14.000 But if he wasn't Dave Chappelle... 0.74
01:53:16.000 If Dave Chappelle wasn't famous and he tried to do most of the jokes that he's doing right now...
01:53:22.000 There would be some people that would tell him, hey, that joke, you've got to get rid of that joke.
01:53:27.000 Or that joke, you've got to stop saying.
01:53:28.000 But once you become established, you can kind of do whatever you want as long as it's good. 1.00
01:53:33.000 But it's like the grandma's stinky pussy joke. 1.00
01:53:36.000 It's like... 0.99
01:53:37.000 When you're a year in or two years into comedy, yeah, it's a tough joke to pull off. 1.00
01:53:42.000 But when you're 15 years in, everybody already knows you're saying wild shit. 0.99
01:53:47.000 Jamar, I can see you saying that right now on stage and people falling out of their chairs laughing. 1.00
01:53:51.000 I can see it.
01:53:52.000 You know what I'm saying?
01:53:54.000 I think I found my closer, my new closer.
01:53:58.000 But it's one of those things, you need to leave people alone.
01:54:04.000 You could come up to a comic and say, hey man, that bit's not popping because people think it's too mean, or maybe you figure out a way to restructure it.
01:54:12.000 We all give each other advice.
01:54:15.000 Comics give each other pointers and tips, and I know that there's bits that I've done that just didn't work right.
01:54:21.000 I'm like, God, why is that bit not working right?
01:54:22.000 Because it needs to be restructured.
01:54:24.000 Yeah.
01:54:24.000 You know, and sometimes...
01:54:25.000 And people act like... 0.99
01:54:27.000 And again, I'm not like all dirty and shit. 0.99
01:54:31.000 No. 1.00
01:54:32.000 But people act like I would do that on The Tonight Show or some shit. 0.79
01:54:36.000 I'm like, yo, if you give me free range, I'm going to say anything I want to do. 0.89
01:54:40.000 I mean, I want to say, if you tell me to, you know... 1.00
01:54:43.000 Well, if The Tonight Show was smart, they would allow that shit. 1.00
01:54:46.000 Bro! 1.00
01:54:46.000 And then people would start paying attention. 1.00
01:54:47.000 Thank you!
01:54:49.000 Yo, you said it.
01:54:51.000 Like, those ratings on those shows are atrocious. 0.99
01:54:55.000 It's so sad because they're so hampered by that system of, like, super clean, here comes a guest I don't give a fuck about. 0.99
01:55:03.000 Yeah. 0.94
01:55:04.000 I'm going to ask them questions about their new sitcom or their new movie or their new album, and I don't really care.
01:55:10.000 And then the band's going to play, and we'll be right back.
01:55:13.000 We'll be right back.
01:55:14.000 Look at this guy.
01:55:14.000 He's got a trained parrot.
01:55:15.000 This is crazy.
01:55:17.000 That is kind of interesting.
01:55:19.000 And then they have commercials, and as long as they don't offend anybody and they keep eyeballs on them, they keep going.
01:55:24.000 But really what they're doing is they're dancing enough for you to pay attention to the commercials.
01:55:29.000 That's most of what that show is.
01:55:31.000 Yeah.
01:55:32.000 Yeah.
01:55:33.000 And they interrupt it all the time.
01:55:35.000 Yeah.
01:55:36.000 Like, when you're doing a sitcom, you know, you have these breaks where you've got to prepare for commercials.
01:55:43.000 Like, they're set up for commercials.
01:55:46.000 These shows, whether it's The Tonight Show...
01:55:49.000 Or the Late Night with Colbert, they're set up for commercials.
01:55:52.000 Yeah.
01:55:53.000 You can't swear.
01:55:54.000 You can't talk crazy.
01:55:55.000 You can't do anything wild.
01:55:57.000 You got a bunch of executives or mortgages are riding on your show.
01:55:59.000 Jamar, slow down!
01:56:01.000 Hey, Jamar, I just bought a new home.
01:56:03.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:56:04.000 In Hancock Park.
01:56:05.000 And I can't have you on here talking crazy.
01:56:08.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 1.00
01:56:09.000 Jamar, my grandmother pussy joke cost me my home. 1.00
01:56:13.000 My home! 0.99
01:56:14.000 Where are my children gonna go to school, Jamar? 1.00
01:56:17.000 Because I can't pay for private school anymore because of your grandmother's pussy joke. 1.00
01:56:21.000 That's really what happens. 1.00
01:56:23.000 There's a bunch of people that they hitch up their fucking caboose to your cart. 1.00
01:56:30.000 And they're like, fuck! 1.00
01:56:32.000 And I would think you would get the best... 1.00
01:56:36.000 You want the best out of the comics or the performers and stuff like that. 1.00
01:56:40.000 So you want these motherfuckers to be free enough to do their shit like that. 1.00
01:56:47.000 I'm not saying I wouldn't do those shows. 1.00
01:56:51.000 If I have to play that game, then I'm going to play it and shit like that. 0.97
01:56:57.000 But if you want the best out of me, it's like, daddy got to do what daddy got to do. 0.98
01:57:01.000 You're a nightclub comic.
01:57:03.000 I've been trying to get these niggas to let me play a dinosaur for years, Joe. 1.00
01:57:06.000 Like, for years.
01:57:07.000 In Jurassic Park?
01:57:09.000 No.
01:57:10.000 It's a half-human, half-dinosaur.
01:57:12.000 His name is Dino Stampinopoulos, and I've been trying to get these niggas to let me play them for years. 1.00
01:57:16.000 You got a character that you got?
01:57:18.000 Who are you trying to get you to play this?
01:57:21.000 I was trying to get, uh...
01:57:23.000 I was trying to get adults...
01:57:27.000 You know, you have a video on Instagram?
01:57:30.000 Hold on.
01:57:31.000 Episode 3?
01:57:33.000 What? 1.00
01:57:34.000 Oh, you're so ridiculous. 1.00
01:57:36.000 I've been trying to get these niggas to let me do this shit for years. 1.00
01:57:40.000 What the fuck is this? 1.00
01:57:43.000 This is Dino's birthday party. 1.00
01:57:45.000 Oh my god, this is so hilarious.
01:57:47.000 It's a half-man, half-dinosaur.
01:57:49.000 What?
01:57:50.000 How long have you been doing this?
01:57:51.000 Bro, I've been doing this character for about like six years.
01:57:57.000 And so it's his birthday.
01:58:01.000 So the homie bring him a cake. 0.69
01:58:02.000 Oh my god, this is hilarious.
01:58:04.000 That's the homie Nate. 1.00
01:58:06.000 Oh my god.
01:58:07.000 And who are the girls? 0.91
01:58:08.000 That's not even real.
01:58:08.000 No, no, that's a Jif.
01:58:10.000 Oh, it's a Jif, so it's a green screen.
01:58:12.000 Oh my god, that's hilarious.
01:58:13.000 Because I'm looking at these girls dancing like, this is so odd.
01:58:16.000 So he gotta blow out the candles. 1.00
01:58:19.000 It's stupid. 1.00
01:58:21.000 Is it dinosaurs that blow out the candles with fire? 1.00
01:58:24.000 Oh, that's hilarious.
01:58:26.000 What made you come up with this?
01:58:28.000 Were you high?
01:58:29.000 No, bro.
01:58:29.000 I took...
01:58:31.000 No, I took a clown class and we had to do certain characters and stuff like that.
01:58:45.000 We had to come up with characters.
01:58:47.000 When did you take your clown class? 1.00
01:58:49.000 Shit. 1.00
01:58:50.000 You gonna check your phone? 1.00
01:58:53.000 That's my Joker.
01:58:56.000 Oh, you have a Joker character?
01:58:58.000 My black Joker.
01:58:59.000 I was like, they need a black Joker.
01:59:00.000 But I took a clown class probably about maybe like three years ago.
01:59:06.000 And so we had to come up with a character and stuff like that.
01:59:11.000 So I had...
01:59:13.000 I had like I had came up with a version. 0.82
01:59:16.000 Well, I had already been doing this dinosaur character, but I started adding wings and little shit to it.
01:59:20.000 You had already been doing the dinosaur character.
01:59:22.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:59:23.000 They're like earlier versions of that thing where he was wearing green.
01:59:26.000 What's the birth of the dinosaur character?
01:59:28.000 So me.
01:59:28.000 Okay.
01:59:29.000 Okay.
01:59:29.000 So me and my friend Jeffrey, we were like, we always like improv together.
01:59:33.000 And then so one day we were we were writing something and I was like, fuck Fuck this shit, man. 1.00
01:59:38.000 I said, man, let's go downstairs and just shoot some sketches. 1.00
01:59:42.000 And then he was like, alright.
01:59:43.000 And I was like, yo.
01:59:44.000 I said, I'm going to grab these green tights right here.
01:59:47.000 And I'm going to grab this tail. 0.99
01:59:48.000 Don't ask me why I had this shit already in my apartment. 0.99
01:59:52.000 And I'm going to play a dinosaur. 1.00
01:59:54.000 And then you're going to play a dude who's stopping and frisking this black-ass dinosaur. 1.00
01:59:59.000 And then so we were just like, it just came through like play. 0.71
02:00:05.000 How much of that do you do? 0.99
02:00:07.000 Like clown classes and shit like that? 1.00
02:00:08.000 Just fucking around. 1.00
02:00:09.000 Oh, that's me. 1.00
02:00:12.000 I've been doing that shit for years. 0.99
02:00:13.000 I've actually been doing improv longer than I've been doing stand-up, but only by a year. 0.99
02:00:18.000 I ain't gonna say, like, oh.
02:00:19.000 But, like, you know, that'd be my bag, you know?
02:00:23.000 Just to be creative? 0.97
02:00:24.000 Just to be silly?
02:00:25.000 Just try to come up with characters? 0.81
02:00:27.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:00:28.000 Just for the love of it.
02:00:29.000 That's why the wave pops up.
02:00:32.000 What is this?
02:00:33.000 So he's trying to go back in time?
02:00:34.000 He's trying to go back in time to meet his biological parents.
02:00:37.000 Dino Stampinopoulos, episode one.
02:00:39.000 And it says in parentheses, there's eight of these.
02:00:43.000 In this episode, Dino's go back in time to meet his biological parents.
02:00:47.000 Thank you for making these fun.
02:00:50.000 Oh my god, you show up. 0.98
02:00:51.000 Who did all this special effects and shit? 0.99
02:00:54.000 Dave Kersh. 0.98
02:00:56.000 And then so Dino has a malfunction where he now looks like this.
02:01:00.000 Oh no.
02:01:01.000 That's my friend Jeffrey Baldinger.
02:01:04.000 So anyway, I made those props.
02:01:05.000 I made that time machine.
02:01:07.000 Like out of a cardboard box.
02:01:09.000 That's his mom.
02:01:09.000 That's Dino's mom.
02:01:12.000 That's my friend Eureka. 0.98
02:01:13.000 Oh, this is so ridiculous. 1.00
02:01:15.000 Look at Dino's dad with his stupid hat on. 1.00
02:01:18.000 Oh my god, this is... 1.00
02:01:19.000 Dino's dad has a suit on.
02:01:21.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 0.99
02:01:24.000 So this is just like some silly shit that you just decided to just... 1.00
02:01:28.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:01:29.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:01:31.000 Yeah, dude. 0.95
02:01:32.000 I've been doing shit like that for like years, bro. 0.98
02:01:35.000 Just for fun. 0.97
02:01:36.000 Yeah, and that's why I like the wave.
02:01:38.000 That's what made the wave fun. 0.99
02:01:39.000 We would do shit like that all the time. 0.98
02:01:41.000 I remember I had those green tights back when Dina was green. 1.00
02:01:44.000 And Kevin Hart, he was one of the judges.
02:01:49.000 And then I came out, like somebody hit a joke, and I came out, and I was like, And then he was like, what did y'all tell the black dude he had to do every time somebody hit a joke or whatever? 1.00
02:02:00.000 They're like, fucking ridiculous. 1.00
02:02:02.000 You don't have to tell Jamar shit? 1.00
02:02:04.000 Hell yeah, tell me shit. 1.00
02:02:05.000 I'm like, that's my Tuesday. 1.00
02:02:06.000 I'm like, that's my Tuesday and a bang energy drink and I'm on.
02:02:11.000 So tell me about clown school.
02:02:12.000 How'd this happen?
02:02:14.000 So, truth be told, like, I didn't know how to, like, if you want to know, like, origin, origin, origin, I didn't know how to start doing stand-up.
02:02:23.000 I've been wanting to do stand-up since I was a kid, but I didn't know how to...
02:02:25.000 Wait a minute, you started when you were 17. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:02:27.000 But I didn't know how to start, like, um...
02:02:32.000 Let me see.
02:02:32.000 It's so many, like, stories, right?
02:02:34.000 So I did it once when I was 16. I did this stand-up comedy competition for BET, like, coming to the stage.
02:02:44.000 It was just an audition because I just wanted to feel how stand-up felt or whatever.
02:02:48.000 And I was like, okay, I'll do this.
02:02:50.000 How long have you been thinking about doing it before you did it?
02:02:53.000 I was a kid.
02:02:55.000 I was young.
02:02:55.000 I remember doing stand-up when I was 10 in my classroom.
02:02:59.000 Yeah, because I didn't have a toy to share.
02:03:02.000 It was for share day.
02:03:03.000 And I didn't have a toy to share for share day.
02:03:05.000 And you got two minutes.
02:03:06.000 So I was like, I'm just going to do some stand-up.
02:03:09.000 Right?
02:03:10.000 And I've been watching Comic View and all this stuff.
02:03:13.000 And so I get up there in front of like this glass and I was at there like, yeah, man. 1.00
02:03:17.000 My grandma's pussy is so sticky. 1.00
02:03:20.000 At this time, my grandma's pussy was so hairy. 1.00
02:03:24.000 Because she was younger, so the funk hadn't hit like that yet. 0.99
02:03:30.000 But my friend was like, yo, how you gonna start doing stand-up?
02:03:34.000 I was like, I I don't know, man.
02:03:35.000 Maybe I'll start doing like some clown stuff or something like that.
02:03:37.000 I was like, maybe like 15. I was like, maybe I'll start doing like some clown stuff or something.
02:03:42.000 Oh, yeah.
02:03:42.000 And I heard about like a clown school in San Francisco.
02:03:45.000 And I was like, oh, yeah, maybe I'll do that.
02:03:47.000 And then that didn't happen.
02:03:49.000 And a friend was like, why don't you just go to like an open mic or something like that?
02:03:52.000 I was like, oh, is that how you get started?
02:03:54.000 And I was like, all right, then maybe I'll do that.
02:03:56.000 But like fast forward, I had a lot of time on my hands back in 2018. I wasn't doing shit. 0.98
02:04:02.000 And I was at the like, man, I was like, nigga, you should take a class. 0.99
02:04:05.000 I was like, you're already in the wave.
02:04:06.000 You already done.
02:04:07.000 I was like, just go take a class.
02:04:08.000 Whatever. 0.90
02:04:08.000 So I took a clown class. 0.90
02:04:10.000 It's called the Clown School. 1.00
02:04:12.000 I'm like on their website and shit. 1.00
02:04:13.000 I'm like the only nigga. 1.00
02:04:14.000 I'm like the only black nigga on their website and shit. 0.99
02:04:16.000 And I just started doing it in 2018. You know what's so fun about that? 0.99
02:04:23.000 Is that if you didn't know what made you funny as a person or whatever, they help you find your inner clown.
02:04:31.000 You know what I'm saying?
02:04:33.000 Everybody has an inner clown and stuff like that. 0.62
02:04:35.000 What's first day of clown school like?
02:04:37.000 So, I remember this assignment.
02:04:41.000 First of all, I walked in there with some Doc Martens on, right?
02:04:44.000 They were maroon Doc Martens.
02:04:46.000 They looked like clown shoes, but they were maroon Doc Martens. 0.52
02:04:51.000 And the clown teachers, they're like, hey, take those off.
02:04:55.000 And I was like, why? 0.94
02:04:56.000 He was like, just take them off.
02:04:58.000 And then it dawned on me, I was like, oh, I was probably disrespecting clown, because he probably thought that that's what I thought a clown was, whatever, people who wear shoes like this, because Doc Martens do kind of look like, you know, clown shoes, whatever.
02:05:10.000 Did he explain?
02:05:13.000 No, but it dawned on me, I was like, hmm, that's probably why.
02:05:17.000 You really think you thought it was disrespectful?
02:05:19.000 To the whole art of clown or whatever.
02:05:21.000 He's like, oh, you think clowns just wear big shoes and get out of small cars?
02:05:26.000 That'd be a funny sketch, dude.
02:05:29.000 A guy who teaches clown classes but is really sensitive about the art of being a clown.
02:05:34.000 And he's a purist. 0.99
02:05:36.000 He's a clown purist. 0.99
02:05:37.000 Yeah. 0.94
02:05:37.000 What do you got, a rubber nose on? 0.94
02:05:38.000 Get that fucking nose off. 1.00
02:05:40.000 So, it's so fucking funny, right? 1.00
02:05:44.000 I remember the first assignment, though, was, hey, come through this door 10 funny ways. 0.89
02:05:52.000 And I was like, oh, that sounds funny.
02:05:54.000 So I mean, so that sounds fun.
02:05:56.000 So I would just come and I would do like a physical act or whatever, but I would do it 10 funny ways.
02:06:00.000 I would come in as a robot and I would come in as a...
02:06:03.000 Did you ever come through naked?
02:06:06.000 No.
02:06:07.000 You should have finished with that.
02:06:08.000 You should take that class and then you should do that.
02:06:11.000 What's up now?
02:06:13.000 But you know what? 0.98
02:06:13.000 They don't limit shit like that, though. 0.98
02:06:15.000 Like, if you wanted to do some shit like that, because they want you to be free. 0.98
02:06:19.000 Oh. 0.99
02:06:21.000 Got it.
02:06:22.000 Yeah, so I remember that assignment, come through this door 10 funny ways.
02:06:26.000 What did you do? 0.88
02:06:27.000 Um, so I came in like, I came in like crawling and shit like that. 0.99
02:06:32.000 And then I came in like retarded and shit like that. 0.99
02:06:35.000 I came in, I came in spinning like this or whatever. 0.99
02:06:38.000 And I remember I like hopped backward like a kangaroo and shit like that. 0.99
02:06:42.000 And it was a bunch of shit like that. 0.98
02:06:46.000 What were they like? 1.00
02:06:47.000 What were the other people in the class like? 1.00
02:06:48.000 Some motherfuckers in there were good. 1.00
02:06:50.000 Really? 1.00
02:06:51.000 Because the thing about clown is that they say the wrong answers are what's funny. 0.99
02:06:59.000 So if you come in or whatever and you accidentally trip and shit like that, like it was an accident, that's what the clown is. 0.98
02:07:07.000 Clowns are the mistakes and stuff like that. 0.99
02:07:10.000 You know, the red nose is actually just puts you in the spirit of being a clown and being silly. 0.99
02:07:17.000 But the maroon Doc Martens don't? 0.97
02:07:20.000 Exactly.
02:07:22.000 You know what that's like?
02:07:23.000 That's like a bad stand-up coach giving you advice on stand-up.
02:07:27.000 That has happened to a lot of people.
02:07:29.000 We're taking stand-up classes from people that aren't even good comics.
02:07:33.000 You've taken stand-up classes before?
02:07:34.000 No, I never have.
02:07:35.000 But I took acting classes from someone who was a terrible actor.
02:07:38.000 Oh, yeah.
02:07:39.000 Like, man, I get more work than this dude.
02:07:41.000 Like, why?
02:07:41.000 Well, I had to take them.
02:07:43.000 It was part of my deal.
02:07:44.000 I had never taken any acting classes before, and I had a sitcom deal.
02:07:48.000 Yeah.
02:07:48.000 And I had to take acting classes.
02:07:50.000 So I took acting classes, and as I was taking acting classes, I was realizing the person teaching me was terrible.
02:07:56.000 Terrible.
02:07:57.000 I was better at pretending to be real than this person was.
02:08:02.000 Yeah.
02:08:02.000 What made them like...
02:08:04.000 They were so fake, Jamar.
02:08:06.000 There was nothing about them that made sense.
02:08:08.000 The way they talked just didn't seem real.
02:08:11.000 That's it?
02:08:12.000 Yeah.
02:08:13.000 You know, some people...
02:08:13.000 You could take an athlete, right?
02:08:17.000 A baseball player who's never acted in their life.
02:08:20.000 And they just know how to be real. 1.00
02:08:21.000 And they'll memorize that shit, and they can pull it off as good as any fucking actor. 1.00
02:08:25.000 There's people out there with talent. 1.00
02:08:26.000 They just don't even know it.
02:08:28.000 Because acting's a weird talent.
02:08:29.000 Like, you got your Denzel Washington.
02:08:32.000 You got your Daniel Day-Lewis.
02:08:34.000 You got your...
02:08:34.000 There's levels, right?
02:08:36.000 There's Christian Bales. 0.99
02:08:38.000 There's levels to acting.
02:08:39.000 But then just regular acting that a lot of people do, there's a lot of people out there that can act. 0.99
02:08:45.000 A lot that can do that regular shit. 0.98
02:08:47.000 I had this epiphany maybe like two years ago where I was like, man, I was watching a commercial. 0.99
02:08:53.000 I was looking at commercial actors and stuff like that.
02:08:56.000 But at the end of the day, they're actors. 0.94
02:08:58.000 And I was just looking at it and I was like, damn, isn't it crazy how that guy is in the same profession as Denzel Washington? 0.85
02:09:05.000 Him and Denzel Washington do the same thing. 0.96
02:09:07.000 They have the same job.
02:09:08.000 Yeah.
02:09:10.000 But that's how it is with every profession, right?
02:09:13.000 I mean, that's how it is with people who make steak. 0.99
02:09:17.000 There's chefs who make a steak and you eat it and you're like, God damn! 0.99
02:09:22.000 And then there's a dude at Denny's who cooks steak. 1.00
02:09:25.000 You get your steak and eggs at Denny's and you're like, damn. 0.99
02:09:28.000 It's food. 0.99
02:09:29.000 It's food.
02:09:30.000 I'm hungry.
02:09:30.000 You eat it.
02:09:31.000 But there's something about acting that it's so hard to get a job To be an actor that we assume that...
02:09:39.000 How many times have athletes...
02:09:42.000 There's been a bunch of times where athletes have... 0.99
02:09:45.000 What was the fucking Adam Sandler movie? 0.99
02:09:52.000 What is it? 1.00
02:09:53.000 Gems?
02:09:53.000 What is it?
02:09:54.000 Uncut Gems.
02:09:56.000 Uncut Gems.
02:09:57.000 Kevin Garnett's in it.
02:09:59.000 And Kevin Garnett is excellent in it.
02:10:01.000 Really?
02:10:01.000 Yes.
02:10:01.000 Excellent.
02:10:02.000 You would think he's a fucking actor. 1.00
02:10:05.000 And he's not. 1.00
02:10:06.000 He's just a great basketball player.
02:10:08.000 I mean, there's many instances of things like that.
02:10:13.000 I mean, I can think of...
02:10:14.000 I bet if I just had time to go over and do like a Google search, actors, athletes who have acted in films.
02:10:22.000 There's a lot of them, man.
02:10:23.000 They can do it.
02:10:24.000 Who do you think is the best athletic...
02:10:27.000 I mean, athlete that's an actor...
02:10:30.000 The biggest one right now.
02:10:32.000 Who?
02:10:32.000 The Rock.
02:10:33.000 Oh, yeah.
02:10:34.000 But it's not...
02:10:34.000 Yeah, kinda.
02:10:36.000 Pro wrestling is so entertainment-oriented, though.
02:10:39.000 No, he didn't play pro football, but he got close.
02:10:41.000 Right, yeah.
02:10:42.000 But, I mean, he was so...
02:10:43.000 Arnold Schwarzenegger?
02:10:45.000 Sort of.
02:10:47.000 I mean, I guess pro sport, I guess.
02:10:49.000 What did he play?
02:10:50.000 Oh, he's a bodybuilder.
02:10:52.000 He's an athlete. 1.00
02:10:54.000 Shit like that, I don't get. 1.00
02:10:55.000 I don't count that. 1.00
02:10:56.000 Like, Terry Crews played for the Rams or some shit, right? 0.90
02:10:58.000 Terry Crews is another great example. 0.98
02:11:00.000 There's a lot of them.
02:11:02.000 People who have figured out how to act.
02:11:04.000 But have they figured out how to act like Robert De Niro?
02:11:09.000 You know what I mean?
02:11:09.000 Like, there's levels.
02:11:11.000 There's levels.
02:11:12.000 There's levels.
02:11:13.000 Like, especially Robert De Niro before he was just cash and checks.
02:11:16.000 You go back to, like, Cape Fear, Robert De Niro.
02:11:19.000 You know, like, Goodfellas, Robert De Niro.
02:11:21.000 Yeah.
02:11:21.000 Like, there's levels.
02:11:22.000 Yeah.
02:11:23.000 There's levels. 0.93
02:11:23.000 I guess there's levels of clowns too. 0.93
02:11:25.000 Goddamn right. 0.99
02:11:27.000 I'm level too. 0.87
02:11:28.000 But there's levels to poetry.
02:11:30.000 I was listening to some poetry being read the other day and just cringing.
02:11:35.000 I had to shut it off.
02:11:35.000 I was like, Jesus Christ.
02:11:37.000 Some people, they read poetry and it's just like...
02:11:42.000 It's just goofy.
02:11:45.000 It's transparent.
02:11:47.000 It doesn't work. 0.99
02:11:48.000 But then, occasionally, you'll stumble upon some woman who's reading poetry, and you're like, oh, shit. 0.99
02:11:53.000 Like, this resonates. 0.99
02:11:54.000 This is real.
02:11:55.000 And I don't know why.
02:11:56.000 Poetry is one of the easiest things to make cringy.
02:12:00.000 Hell yeah.
02:12:01.000 The easiest.
02:12:02.000 Yep. 0.99
02:12:03.000 I used to go to poetry lounges all the fucking time. 0.99
02:12:07.000 And it's... 0.99
02:12:08.000 It's such... 0.98
02:12:09.000 Like, in comedy, you see some bad comedy, you'd be at there like, man, it's like a trash. 0.97
02:12:13.000 You know what I'm saying? 0.90
02:12:14.000 Like, you can express that.
02:12:15.000 You know what I'm saying? 1.00
02:12:16.000 You can't do that shit. 1.00
02:12:17.000 Like, this bitch is talking about her grandma in a very terrible fucking clunky... 1.00
02:12:21.000 A very green way. 1.00
02:12:23.000 Green.
02:12:23.000 Green's a good way to put it.
02:12:24.000 Yeah.
02:12:25.000 Like it, but you can't boo that.
02:12:27.000 I went to a poetry slam once with Brian Callan in Venice.
02:12:30.000 He's like, you gotta come see this.
02:12:31.000 I go, what is it?
02:12:32.000 He's like, there's a poetry reading near my house.
02:12:34.000 I'm like, oh my god, I'm there.
02:12:35.000 And it was so bad.
02:12:36.000 It was so bad.
02:12:37.000 And then sometimes people would snap their fingers when they liked things.
02:12:42.000 They would like it.
02:12:43.000 They would clap.
02:12:44.000 They would snap their fingers.
02:12:45.000 It was so clunky.
02:12:46.000 Joe, I remember one time I went to a poetry lounge and I was dressed as a baby.
02:13:03.000 What were you wearing?
02:13:04.000 A diaper?
02:13:05.000 Bro, I was wearing...
02:13:06.000 It's a blue bonnet.
02:13:09.000 A bonnet?
02:13:10.000 Or like those little baby caps or whatever.
02:13:13.000 I had on a bib.
02:13:14.000 I had on a diaper.
02:13:16.000 And it was called...
02:13:17.000 The character was called Crack Baby from Compton.
02:13:20.000 Yeah.
02:13:21.000 I swear to God.
02:13:22.000 And I went up there, and I went up there, and I was like, and I had a wagon.
02:13:27.000 I had a wagon. 0.98
02:13:29.000 And the wagon had toys, and I got the picture up on my motherfucking page. 0.98
02:13:33.000 Find it. 0.98
02:13:34.000 Wait a minute.
02:13:35.000 Jamie's on it.
02:13:36.000 Jamie's on it.
02:13:37.000 How far?
02:13:38.000 How long ago was this?
02:13:39.000 About 2018. And it's called Crack Baby from Compton.
02:13:43.000 I'm holding it like this.
02:13:45.000 Ugh.
02:13:48.000 And anyway, so I went up there, but they thought that I was about to go be deep and talk about my mother and how she, and I was up there, I was telling jokes as the crack baby.
02:13:58.000 That would be a great way to do it.
02:14:00.000 Like, talking about your mother.
02:14:01.000 And guess what? 0.99
02:14:02.000 And when I was doing that shit, and when I was doing that shit, since I was telling jokes and stuff, instead of doing poetry, whatever, but I was at a poetry lounge, somebody heckled me. 0.99
02:14:11.000 Yeah, somebody heckled me, because I had a joke, I had a joke, I was like, knock I was like, I can't even do the voice right now, but I was like, knock, knock. 0.99
02:14:19.000 And then somebody was up there like, bye, nigga. 0.99
02:14:24.000 Instead of who's there, they was up there like, bye, nigga. 1.00
02:14:27.000 And I was up there like, ah.
02:14:36.000 I thought it was poetic.
02:14:43.000 I mean, who else would come up here?
02:14:45.000 Actually, I felt like I was more vulnerable than them.
02:14:47.000 I was the one naked.
02:14:50.000 Isn't it funny, though, that people...
02:14:51.000 There's a thing that people do with comedy, too, where they get upset about what happens before them.
02:14:56.000 And that was one of the things you would get with prima donnas. 1.00
02:14:59.000 They would get upset if someone was dirty before them.
02:15:02.000 You know, like, I don't want that guy going on before me. 0.94
02:15:04.000 He's too dirty. 0.95
02:15:05.000 He talks about this. 1.00
02:15:07.000 There's you!
02:15:09.000 That was basically the character, but...
02:15:12.000 Is there other pictures?
02:15:15.000 2018 is probably in...
02:15:18.000 Jamie's furiously scrolling.
02:15:21.000 He's got a final on Twitter, but his Twitter account got suspended.
02:15:24.000 You got suspended on Twitter?
02:15:27.000 So...
02:15:28.000 Ah!
02:15:34.000 This is so...
02:15:35.000 This is so... 1.00
02:15:38.000 First of all, fuck Twitter. 1.00
02:15:40.000 Like, I love Twitter, but fuck them. 1.00
02:15:44.000 Because, alright bro, I had like, I had just got like a gang of fucking followers, okay? 1.00
02:15:50.000 This is what the fuck I did, and this is why they cancelled me. 0.97
02:15:54.000 I was verified on my original one. 0.99
02:15:57.000 And so I was doing the profile switch.
02:16:01.000 So I would change my profile to Donald Trump's profile picture.
02:16:05.000 And I would change all of that.
02:16:07.000 And so when I tweeted, it looked like Donald Trump was tweeting. 0.99
02:16:10.000 And so I was tweeting shit like, I'm in the mood for a mozzarella hot dog with bacon on it. 1.00
02:16:16.000 And then all these people were like, this is your fucking president? 1.00
02:16:20.000 Because people thought that it was really him. 1.00
02:16:23.000 I would tweet shit. 1.00
02:16:24.000 I would tweet shit like, and so this is, so I tweeted this. 1.00
02:16:28.000 That's it? 0.99
02:16:28.000 No, I tweeted this during the election. 0.99
02:16:30.000 It was during the election when, like, I could probably sway votes and shit. 0.84
02:16:34.000 Like, you know, like, with this verified account. 0.93
02:16:37.000 And I tweeted, if I lose this election, I'm gonna go live in a train car in London, you know?
02:16:42.000 And then...
02:16:43.000 That's it?
02:16:43.000 Mm-hmm.
02:16:44.000 And then the next time I tried to tweet, my shit was suspended. 0.99
02:16:47.000 That's it? 1.00
02:16:48.000 Yeah, and they show porn on Twitter. 1.00
02:16:50.000 They show anal porn. 1.00
02:16:51.000 They show girls taking it right in the ass. 1.00
02:16:54.000 They show ass to mouth. 1.00
02:16:56.000 They show everything. 0.98
02:16:57.000 But you can't act like the president. 0.97
02:16:59.000 But that's ridiculous. 1.00
02:17:00.000 If you look at the actual account, how stupid are people? 1.00
02:17:03.000 It's like my name was right next to me. 1.00
02:17:05.000 It says Jamar neighbors.
02:17:05.000 Why do you think that's really the president?
02:17:07.000 And they canceled the shit out of my shit. 1.00
02:17:09.000 That's so crazy. 1.00
02:17:10.000 That doesn't make any sense at all.
02:17:12.000 They said I violated the rules.
02:17:14.000 Oh, come on. 0.87
02:17:15.000 You're a comedian.
02:17:16.000 That's parody.
02:17:17.000 That's fun.
02:17:18.000 Dude, we live in a weird time, man. 0.99
02:17:19.000 Are you paying attention to all this stock market shit with GameStop? 0.99
02:17:22.000 So, I heard a little bit about it. 0.99
02:17:24.000 We covered it a little bit yesterday. 0.99
02:17:26.000 My friend Sagar and Jetty from Rising, The Hill, he covered it and we played some of his shit. 0.94
02:17:32.000 What basically is going on is... 0.95
02:17:34.000 These people who are speculators on Wall Street, they short stocks, meaning they are gambling that a stock is going to lose value.
02:17:45.000 And so then these Redditors, these smart dudes on Reddit are like, you know what? 1.00
02:17:49.000 Fuck these people. 0.99
02:17:50.000 Let's just buy a bunch of this stock and jack that price up. 1.00
02:17:54.000 And so they all got together, thousands of them, and they bought a shitload of that stock and the price went fucking flying. 0.94
02:18:00.000 Like, went way up! 0.62
02:18:02.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:18:02.000 And so then all the hedge fund people that were gambling on it, losing money, they lost billions of dollars.
02:18:08.000 Yeah.
02:18:09.000 Like, instantly.
02:18:09.000 And Wall Street started panicking.
02:18:11.000 And so then they realized, these Redditors realized they can do this, so they started dealing with other stocks, like movie theater stocks.
02:18:17.000 And so then this app called Robinhood, which is an app, which is, Robinhood is supposed to be, steal from the rich, give to the poor.
02:18:26.000 Right.
02:18:26.000 That's the story of Robinhood.
02:18:28.000 Instead, they are protecting all these hedge fund people by stopping people from doing this.
02:18:34.000 So they're stopping all the sale of these stocks that these Redditors all get excited about.
02:18:40.000 So these people, even if they buy the stock, now they can't sell it.
02:18:44.000 Or now they...
02:18:45.000 Is that what it is?
02:18:46.000 Or they can't buy it?
02:18:47.000 They can't buy it.
02:18:48.000 They can't buy it anymore.
02:18:50.000 They can sell, but they can't buy it.
02:18:51.000 So they've essentially tried to do what they can to stop this scam.
02:18:56.000 And everyone is furious at them.
02:19:00.000 So much so that I sent you an article that Google removed over 100,000 one-star reviews from their app store because they...
02:19:13.000 They were saving this application from having one star in the Google app because everyone was so mad at them.
02:19:19.000 But meanwhile, that's a legit criticism.
02:19:23.000 Here it is.
02:19:24.000 Google salvaged Robinhood's one star rating by deleting nearly 100,000 negative reviews.
02:19:30.000 Unhappy users have been review bombing the app.
02:19:34.000 So that's what's going on.
02:19:35.000 What basically is happening, Jamar, is that all these people forever have been manipulating the stock market and making a shitload of money doing it.
02:19:42.000 Hedge funds.
02:19:43.000 All these billionaire Wall Street people.
02:19:45.000 Now, regular folks on Reddit are starting to do the exact same thing, and they're making millions of dollars!
02:19:52.000 Millions of dollars in the apps with stocks, and they're trying to figure out a way to stop these people from doing this.
02:19:59.000 Because they don't want them to be able to do it.
02:20:01.000 They want Wall Street to be able to do it.
02:20:02.000 Normal people are...
02:20:03.000 Yeah.
02:20:04.000 Normal people are being penalized for figuring out a new way to hack the system that Wall Street has been manipulating forever.
02:20:12.000 I need to tell my...
02:20:13.000 Is that accurate?
02:20:14.000 What I said, that's an accurate way of describing it?
02:20:16.000 Basically.
02:20:16.000 That's a very good, simple way to describe it, yeah.
02:20:18.000 There's more levels to it.
02:20:20.000 Sagar did a much better job of it.
02:20:24.000 You can go to their YouTube page, Crystal Ball and Sagar and Jetty.
02:20:29.000 It's called Rising the Hill. 0.96
02:20:31.000 It's my favorite political talk show because there's a person, Sagar's on the right and Crystal's on the left, but they're both honest and objective and they discuss how fucked up this is and how crazy it is. 0.93
02:20:43.000 It's It's gone on. 0.91
02:20:45.000 It's still going on today?
02:20:46.000 Yeah, so after yesterday, it went on through the stock market.
02:20:50.000 Because the shutdown happened, I think people's attention was like, well, if they're going to do that to us, let's take it over the crypto market.
02:20:55.000 And so now Dogecoin, which started as a complete joke, has skyrocketed to not a joke anymore.
02:21:02.000 It hit an all-time high of almost 10 cents yesterday, but it was so minuscule, you wouldn't have understood why you have millions of shares.
02:21:09.000 Didn't Elon tweet that too?
02:21:10.000 So Elon has been adding to this.
02:21:11.000 He'll tweet something and it'll make something spike.
02:21:14.000 He added Bitcoin to his info, I think his bio.
02:21:16.000 And also that gentleman who's running for governor of California.
02:21:20.000 How do you say his name again?
02:21:21.000 I don't know if he's actually running for.
02:21:22.000 I saw him get asked that.
02:21:24.000 He's like, is this real?
02:21:25.000 And he was like, well, technically, recall Gavin Newsom.
02:21:27.000 I don't think he's officially, he's not following paperwork or anything.
02:21:30.000 He's having fun.
02:21:30.000 Yeah, I think so.
02:21:31.000 Yeah, he's having fun.
02:21:32.000 But he tweeted about it too.
02:21:34.000 He was with Google or with Facebook?
02:21:38.000 Google.
02:21:38.000 But do you have anything to do with Facebook ever?
02:21:41.000 Probably.
02:21:41.000 Probably.
02:21:41.000 Find out if you did.
02:21:42.000 Because I'm reading Matt Taibbi's book, Hate Inc.
02:21:49.000 Yes.
02:21:49.000 Earlier at Facebook.
02:21:50.000 Maybe not Google.
02:21:51.000 Maybe it was Facebook then.
02:21:52.000 I'm sorry.
02:21:52.000 Instead of Google.
02:21:52.000 Correct.
02:21:53.000 Okay.
02:21:53.000 But he's basically explaining in one of his tweets recently.
02:21:57.000 Pull that up because he was comparing Robin Hood to Facebook.
02:22:01.000 And he's saying that they pretend that you're a customer.
02:22:04.000 But you're not a customer.
02:22:05.000 In fact, you're the client.
02:22:07.000 And what you are is you're the product.
02:22:11.000 And they pretend that they're doing you service.
02:22:14.000 But what they're really doing is they're taking all of your data and they're selling it and they're getting rich.
02:22:21.000 And they're not giving you any of that money.
02:22:23.000 And that's the same thing with Robinhood.
02:22:24.000 It's the same sort of scenario.
02:22:26.000 He laid it out in his Twitter. 0.95
02:22:29.000 But it's a situation where Once this genie's out of the bottle, where these regular people have figured out how to manipulate stock markets, and truth be told, I don't know jack shit about stock markets. 0.90
02:22:41.000 I don't know anything. 0.94
02:22:42.000 I literally barely pay attention.
02:22:44.000 But they've figured out how to manipulate it.
02:22:46.000 And once they've figured out how to do this, they can keep doing this.
02:22:50.000 I don't know how they're going to stop it.
02:22:51.000 I have no idea.
02:22:52.000 How are you going to stop Reddit? 0.99
02:22:53.000 How are you going to stop these intelligent fucking people with plenty of time that are organizing? 0.96
02:23:00.000 I mean, but you'd have to know how to actually do it, because I was over here like, maybe I should call my brother and tell him he should get in on this. 0.98
02:23:11.000 But it's like a Ponzi scheme.
02:23:13.000 It's like a pump and dump, right?
02:23:14.000 The idea is, like, you get in early, and then it gets to a certain point.
02:23:17.000 You got to realize, like, okay, it's time to get out.
02:23:20.000 It's time to get out. 0.99
02:23:21.000 Like, if you buy it a dollar, and then it gets to $30, and then you're like, shit, this might crash soon. 0.99
02:23:26.000 Get out now! 1.00
02:23:27.000 I don't know what the number would be.
02:23:29.000 I'm just saying it.
02:23:30.000 I think that's what a lot of people think, but the understanding I have of this GameStop situation is what makes it a little different is that short squeeze situation is where there's contracts, which I think it just happened because the market just closed.
02:23:41.000 Because those contracts exist, someone has to buy that contract at the end of the day when the contract comes to When does the market close?
02:23:48.000 Four o'clock every day.
02:23:50.000 Oh, four o'clock East Coast time?
02:23:51.000 It just closed half an hour ago.
02:23:53.000 So that's what this big issue was.
02:23:54.000 These contracts, you could tell, were going to close on the 29th, which is Friday, at 4 p.m.
02:23:59.000 And when that happens, whoever holds that contract has to fill.
02:24:03.000 They have to fill the contract.
02:24:04.000 So they'll find the shares. 1.00
02:24:05.000 Oh, so that's why these hedge fund people are fucked. 0.97
02:24:08.000 So we'll see what happens after the next couple days, which is like after hours trading. 0.99
02:24:12.000 It's not something a retail investor gets to do, and these hedge funds do get to do.
02:24:16.000 That's what was happening maybe two days ago.
02:24:18.000 They were driving the price down because they have the ability to do that.
02:24:22.000 They have abilities that retail investors don't have, and that's really the big argument I feel like is going on right now. 0.93
02:24:27.000 It's like, they can do shit we can't do.
02:24:28.000 It's all so weird because the stock market has always been this weird number thing that's based on confidence. 0.83
02:24:35.000 Like, you can decide, buy, sell.
02:24:38.000 Where's it going?
02:24:39.000 Where's it going?
02:24:39.000 Sell it!
02:24:40.000 Sell, sell, sell!
02:24:41.000 Sounds stressful.
02:24:42.000 Oh my god.
02:24:43.000 I had a friend of mine that I used to do taekwondo with that became a stock market guy. 0.99
02:24:47.000 And he was just into coke and hookers. 0.93
02:24:50.000 And then he got into the stock market. 0.99
02:24:52.000 And I ran into him once.
02:24:53.000 This is when I was doing stand-up.
02:24:56.000 I hadn't seen him forever.
02:24:57.000 He's like not a guy that you would think of being as a market guy.
02:25:01.000 He was a tank. 0.99
02:25:02.000 He was like 5'10", 220, big thick fucking neck, always partying. 1.00
02:25:08.000 Just a fucking animal. 1.00
02:25:09.000 I think he was on steroids. 1.00
02:25:10.000 And I ran into him and he was just doing coke and drinking.
02:25:14.000 Yeah.
02:25:14.000 And tell him he's in the stock market now.
02:25:16.000 I was like, you're a stock broker? 0.99
02:25:18.000 He's like, bro, it's fucking fun, man. 0.99
02:25:20.000 I fucking love it, man. 0.99
02:25:22.000 We're selling stocks. 0.99
02:25:23.000 We're making money.
02:25:24.000 He was an animal.
02:25:26.000 I thought of a stock market analyst as being a guy with a pocket protector. 1.00
02:25:32.000 Like Warren Buffett or some shit. 0.97
02:25:33.000 Well, back in the day, I thought they had a calculator and a computer, and they really knew a lot about the business. 0.99
02:25:37.000 And they were just really calculated about their investments.
02:25:40.000 And then I ran into this wild dude that I knew from my fighting days.
02:25:43.000 I'm like, this guy's wild.
02:25:45.000 I'm like, you're a stockbroker?
02:25:47.000 And he was like, dude, that's what we do.
02:25:48.000 How long has he been in it?
02:25:51.000 We're talking about a long time ago.
02:25:53.000 I just ran into him randomly at a comedy club.
02:25:55.000 But he had been doing it for a few years.
02:25:58.000 I always think that I want to get into that.
02:26:00.000 I'm like, oh man, maybe you should buy some stock.
02:26:05.000 But then I'm also like, nigga, what are you talking about?
02:26:07.000 You don't even know what stock is.
02:26:08.000 And I'm like, yeah, but I should still buy some, right? 0.98
02:26:11.000 You're too busy with clown college. 1.00
02:26:12.000 You don't know shit about stocks. 0.99
02:26:14.000 How are you going to know what you're investing in? 0.99
02:26:17.000 I don't know.
02:26:18.000 I had this idea where I was just like, if I ever did invest in anything, it would probably be copper.
02:26:26.000 Do you think that the stock market's broken now?
02:26:28.000 Why copper?
02:26:30.000 Well, because I figured that copper isn't everything, you know?
02:26:37.000 Right?
02:26:37.000 It takes copper to make batteries, so people will always buy batteries.
02:26:43.000 That's true.
02:26:44.000 Is copper in batteries?
02:26:46.000 Lithium ion.
02:26:46.000 It's called Duracell, the copper top.
02:26:49.000 Oh, yeah.
02:26:49.000 That's how I make my...
02:26:51.000 What about energizers?
02:26:53.000 They don't have...
02:26:54.000 But then pennies.
02:26:55.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:26:56.000 I fucking hate pennies. 1.00
02:26:57.000 Bro. 1.00
02:26:58.000 I'm not a fan. 1.00
02:26:59.000 Round that shit off. 1.00
02:26:59.000 Coin shortage. 1.00
02:27:00.000 Why is it every time you need a penny, you can't find a penny?
02:27:02.000 Well, there's been scams where they've stolen, like, a penny on a dollar on things, and they've made millions of dollars on that.
02:27:10.000 That's what, uh...
02:27:12.000 That movie is about with Ben Affleck and Giovanni Ribisi.
02:27:16.000 I can't think of it right now.
02:27:17.000 Right.
02:27:17.000 That's where I heard it.
02:27:18.000 That's right.
02:27:19.000 That's right.
02:27:20.000 And that's a stock market.
02:27:21.000 And then the office space thing, too.
02:27:24.000 They're like shaving off a tenth of a penny.
02:27:25.000 That's right.
02:27:26.000 Yeah.
02:27:26.000 Well, that was one of Bernie Sanders' ideas.
02:27:28.000 That's one of the things that made me attracted to what he was saying about the ability to raise money to pay off money.
02:27:35.000 Student loan debt and for Medicare for All.
02:27:39.000 The idea was that they were going to take a small amount of each speculation bet on Wall Street. 0.99
02:27:46.000 So this same kind of shit that we're talking about with GameStop that fucked over these guys. 0.97
02:27:51.000 Before that, those speculators, he was going to take a small percentage, less than one cent off of each speculation. 0.99
02:27:58.000 Individual sale and speculation.
02:28:02.000 He said he was going to raise trillions of dollars just doing that.
02:28:05.000 And it makes you think, oh, wait a minute, is that possible?
02:28:08.000 If that's possible, that sounds like a good way to do it. 0.89
02:28:10.000 That's a shitty thing they're doing anyway.
02:28:13.000 If you're not willing to pay a small portion of it, like a percentage of a cent, if you took a whole cent, let's say they took one penny off of every speculation, you're not willing to pay one cent?
02:28:28.000 Yeah, that is brilliant.
02:28:30.000 Yeah, one cent?
02:28:31.000 Even one cent would be like, I'd be like, that's reasonable. 0.99
02:28:34.000 Like, if you wanted to buy a house, and they're like, well, we need taxes.
02:28:36.000 Okay, well, how much?
02:28:37.000 A penny.
02:28:38.000 Okay.
02:28:39.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:28:39.000 Okay, I'm gonna buy a car.
02:28:41.000 Well, we need taxes.
02:28:42.000 How much?
02:28:42.000 A penny.
02:28:43.000 Who's gonna complain about a penny?
02:28:45.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:28:45.000 If everything was one penny.
02:28:46.000 Yeah.
02:28:47.000 One penny in sales tax for everything.
02:28:49.000 Are they getting rid of auto coins?
02:28:51.000 Auto coins?
02:28:52.000 Are they getting rid of all the coins?
02:28:54.000 Oh, all the coins. 1.00
02:28:55.000 Like quarters and shit. 0.98
02:28:56.000 Like, isn't that a thing right now? 0.99
02:28:58.000 Are they?
02:28:58.000 That's what I was saying.
02:28:59.000 There's a coin shortage.
02:29:01.000 There's a shortage?
02:29:02.000 Yeah.
02:29:02.000 Where are they all going?
02:29:03.000 I think it was because...
02:29:05.000 Fountains?
02:29:06.000 Fountains.
02:29:07.000 Fountains.
02:29:07.000 Fountains.
02:29:07.000 Fountains.
02:29:08.000 He said wishing.
02:29:09.000 I think the mints closed because of COVID and so they couldn't keep making them and so there wasn't enough going around in circulation.
02:29:16.000 So they're thinking about getting rid of coins?
02:29:18.000 No, no.
02:29:18.000 I don't know if they're getting rid of them.
02:29:19.000 I just know that most of the year there's been a shortage.
02:29:21.000 Like when you go to the places like pay with card only, we don't have cash. 0.98
02:29:25.000 Bro, you know what my favorite shit to do is ever? 0.99
02:29:26.000 Because I'm such a dork. 0.99
02:29:27.000 I like paying for things with Apple Pay. 0.95
02:29:30.000 I like going double-click, look at my face, doot-doot, and buying my groceries.
02:29:34.000 Like, look at that.
02:29:35.000 Look at that.
02:29:36.000 I'm in the future.
02:29:36.000 I love Apple Pay.
02:29:38.000 I just got into tapping my cart.
02:29:40.000 I just got into that.
02:29:42.000 I'm still doing the chip, pushing in the chip.
02:29:44.000 I remember when that was new.
02:29:46.000 That was new.
02:29:47.000 Yeah.
02:29:48.000 Now you can just tap it.
02:29:49.000 I've never tapped.
02:29:50.000 I've tried.
02:29:50.000 I can never get it to work.
02:29:52.000 I did it at an arcade the other day.
02:29:54.000 An arcade?
02:29:55.000 You're going to arcades?
02:29:56.000 What are you playing, Pac-Man?
02:29:58.000 Oh, Joe, I was doing the punching machine.
02:30:00.000 Oh! 0.60
02:30:01.000 What's your high score?
02:30:02.000 Oh, okay, so the high score was 900, and I got 808. Yeah.
02:30:09.000 But it was a...
02:30:10.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:30:12.000 There were some chicks who were with me and shit, and they were hitting that shit. 1.00
02:30:16.000 I was like, God damn! 1.00
02:30:18.000 I was like, y'all do need us. 1.00
02:30:20.000 I'm like, I'm just over here getting 285 and shit. 0.96
02:30:29.000 There's a trick to those punching machines. 0.99
02:30:31.000 You gotta throw a hook.
02:30:33.000 Oh, that's how I did it.
02:30:35.000 It wasn't a straight.
02:30:35.000 Straight punches.
02:30:36.000 You can get a lot with straight punches, but really what you want to do is stand beside it.
02:30:41.000 That's how I got my 808. Shovel punch.
02:30:43.000 Yeah, I'm not like a brute.
02:30:45.000 I'm like, I knew what I was doing. 1.00
02:30:47.000 You gotta shovel punch that motherfucker. 1.00
02:30:49.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:30:50.000 Those are very addictive, though, those punching machines.
02:30:53.000 Dude, I swear to God, we spent like $15 on that thing, dude.
02:30:56.000 Just trying to get our ego up, you know?
02:30:59.000 Dude, I broke my knuckle on one once.
02:31:01.000 Really?
02:31:01.000 Yeah, because you know how they have the leather pad?
02:31:04.000 Like, there's the ball.
02:31:05.000 Yeah.
02:31:05.000 And then there's a leather pad of the metal thing.
02:31:08.000 And I was like, the ball was deflated and they didn't have a pump.
02:31:11.000 So I'm like, let me just punch that metal thing. 1.00
02:31:13.000 And I blasted that fucking thing. 0.99
02:31:15.000 My knuckle was cracked for a long time. 1.00
02:31:18.000 Have you ever broke one of the machines, Joe?
02:31:20.000 No.
02:31:20.000 No, I never broke the machine, but I did get told to stop kicking it because I was kicking it.
02:31:25.000 Dude, you're a kid.
02:31:25.000 I was trying to figure out what's the best way to do it.
02:31:29.000 I was like, a wheel kick would be the best way to do it. 1.00
02:31:31.000 Just blast that motherfucker. 1.00
02:31:33.000 Did you get it? 1.00
02:31:33.000 Yeah, yeah. 1.00
02:31:34.000 Oh, yeah, yeah.
02:31:35.000 But my heel, after I hit it, was bouncing off the back of the machine because you go through the bag and the trajectory is, you know, your legs are longer than your arms.
02:31:47.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:31:48.000 Bouncing it off the machine after I hit it. 0.92
02:31:50.000 Dude, you're destructive. 0.99
02:31:52.000 I was like, this is just a silly machine. 0.98
02:31:55.000 Can you get one of those machines in here? 0.84
02:31:56.000 I should, right? 1.00
02:31:57.000 Shit. 1.00
02:31:57.000 I should have one of those machines in here. 1.00
02:31:58.000 Alright, then I'll move to Austin.
02:31:59.000 Okay.
02:32:00.000 That's it.
02:32:00.000 It's on.
02:32:01.000 Whoever makes those machines, holler at me on Instagram.
02:32:04.000 We'll find it.
02:32:05.000 Holler at Jamie.
02:32:05.000 This is better.
02:32:06.000 Holler at me.
02:32:07.000 I'm not going to read it.
02:32:07.000 But holler at Jamie.
02:32:08.000 We'll get one of those.
02:32:09.000 Oh, bro.
02:32:10.000 Speaking of arcade, I was riffing with my friend the other day.
02:32:18.000 About this arcade game.
02:32:20.000 I drew it. 0.97
02:32:20.000 I drew it, and I was just fucking around. 0.97
02:32:22.000 It was just an art piece. 0.94
02:32:23.000 But I was like, oh, this should be a real thing.
02:32:25.000 I said, okay, it's like Street Fighter, but instead of using, like, you know, the Street Fighter people, it's called Murder Mayhem, and then Murder Mayhem USA. So what you do is you actually use all the murderers in U.S. history, and, like, but...
02:32:40.000 Have them fight against each other?
02:32:41.000 Yeah. 0.99
02:32:42.000 So you can pick O.J., you can pick the Dylan Roof, and then have them, like, fight each other and shit, dude. 0.99
02:32:48.000 Oh! 0.99
02:32:50.000 Yeah.
02:32:50.000 Wow.
02:32:51.000 Jeffrey Domber versus Ted Bundy.
02:32:54.000 Hell yeah, bro.
02:32:55.000 Fight to the death of knives.
02:32:55.000 Casey Anthony, bro.
02:32:56.000 She's swinging a baby at you and shit. 1.00
02:33:01.000 You play it. 1.00
02:33:02.000 We're getting that in here, too.
02:33:03.000 And then I'm moving to Austin.
02:33:04.000 That could sell.
02:33:06.000 People would get furious. 0.91
02:33:07.000 Like, you remember how people got really mad at Grand Theft Auto because you could kill a hooker with a crowbar? 0.66
02:33:11.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:33:11.000 What are you doing?
02:33:13.000 Like, but...
02:33:14.000 You know, they think, like, you're going to encourage people to go do that, but it doesn't really work that way.
02:33:17.000 Yeah, why would I ever fucking really do that unless I was, like, the grim sleeper?
02:33:22.000 It doesn't work that way, though.
02:33:23.000 There's no evidence that, like, violence in video games actually encourages violence, but some people believe it does.
02:33:28.000 Like, some people believe, like, that Call of Duty makes people want to go shoot people.
02:33:33.000 You'd figure that you'd get your violence fix from that, and then I'm done.
02:33:40.000 That's what the Japanese believe.
02:33:42.000 They believe in kinky videos and violence and stuff, that you get all of it out of your system that way, and you don't actually go and perpetrate it.
02:33:51.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:33:53.000 What do you got there, Jamie?
02:33:58.000 Oh, that's right.
02:33:59.000 On Twitter, and it's on Twitter, isn't it?
02:34:01.000 Have you seen that? 1.00
02:34:02.000 Yeah, on Twitter, where you can't pretend to be the president, but you can watch a dude stick a fucking Q-tip up a dude's ass at the airport. 1.00
02:34:10.000 Is this real? 1.00
02:34:11.000 What is this?
02:34:12.000 This is COVID? This is the COVID test at the airport.
02:34:15.000 Now, why is this person dressed up like a prisoner?
02:34:18.000 Oh, it's a mannequin.
02:34:19.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:34:19.000 I was like, that bitch is weird. 1.00
02:34:20.000 She's like a bitch in a ring. 1.00
02:34:22.000 Like, if you were having sex with a girl doggy style like that, you'd be like, what are you doing with your legs? 1.00
02:34:25.000 I'm like, well, first of all, where's her ass? 1.00
02:34:27.000 This is uncomfortable. 0.99
02:34:28.000 So they're showing you how to do it.
02:34:30.000 They stick it.
02:34:31.000 They dig it in there.
02:34:35.000 Okay.
02:34:36.000 So is that real?
02:34:37.000 That's how they're going to do COVID tests now?
02:34:39.000 And it comes out brown? 1.00
02:34:39.000 Stick it up your asshole? 1.00
02:34:41.000 Yeah. 1.00
02:34:42.000 Smell it!
02:34:42.000 What do you do if someone's got diarrhea, and the moment you put it in there, it's like popping the cork off the bottle, and just champagne!
02:34:50.000 They're going to hold it for the test.
02:34:52.000 Oh, yeah.
02:34:53.000 Stevo.
02:34:54.000 Stevo's going to fly to China just to do a video. 1.00
02:34:57.000 Hey, check my ass! 0.99
02:34:59.000 I might have it! 1.00
02:35:01.000 Blasto! 0.98
02:35:01.000 Blasto! 0.98
02:35:04.000 That shit's ridiculous. 1.00
02:35:05.000 And people are going to actually do this? 1.00
02:35:08.000 Of course.
02:35:09.000 There's some people that are going to be happy.
02:35:10.000 Use two Q-tips because one's not enough.
02:35:13.000 All these two masked people.
02:35:14.000 Do you think there's any chance that people in China are trolling us?
02:35:16.000 Because they're like, oh no, they're going to believe this too.
02:35:18.000 Wait, like, and it's not real?
02:35:20.000 It's certainly a possibility. 1.00
02:35:21.000 Stop making fake cool shit. 0.99
02:35:26.000 There's certainly a possibility that they're trying to undermine society in America by pretending they're doing things here and we start doing it. 0.99
02:35:34.000 Do you see they're telling you to wear three masks now?
02:35:37.000 Some people are saying three masks are 90% effective, but two masks are only 70% effective.
02:35:42.000 You should wear three masks.
02:35:43.000 Now we gotta wear two masks?
02:35:44.000 They're telling you to wear two masks.
02:35:46.000 And a lot of people are like, I'm happy to wear two masks.
02:35:49.000 Happy.
02:35:50.000 The same people that take photos on Twitter, their profile picture has them wearing a mask.
02:35:54.000 Yeah.
02:35:55.000 Yeah, they're wearing two masks now.
02:35:57.000 Question, how often are we supposed to change out our masks?
02:36:00.000 Never.
02:36:01.000 They didn't tell us that.
02:36:02.000 That's how you build immunity.
02:36:04.000 Get all that funk in your mask.
02:36:06.000 Just live with it.
02:36:06.000 Yeah, like you're developing a culture of bacteria.
02:36:09.000 It's inside the mask that keeps you healthy. 1.00
02:36:12.000 How long is this mass shit going to last, man? 0.99
02:36:14.000 I don't know, but Fauci was saying that we're never going to shake hands again. 1.00
02:36:17.000 I'm like, bitch, I never stopped. 0.98
02:36:18.000 I never stopped shaking hands. 1.00
02:36:20.000 What are you talking about?
02:36:21.000 We're never going to shake hands again.
02:36:22.000 This is the same guy, by the way, not to diminish his reputation as a doctor and a person of medicine, because he is a brilliant guy, but he was telling people in the 1980s that everybody was going to die of AIDS. Same guy.
02:36:34.000 It's the same guy that thought everyone was going to die from HIV back in the AIDS scare.
02:36:40.000 Yeah.
02:36:41.000 You know, these people, they always fear for the worst. 0.96
02:36:45.000 Because historically, there have been cases, whether it's the Black Plague or Ebola, there's been cases where a disease comes along that fucking kills everybody. 1.00
02:36:53.000 Do you want to hear some gross shit? 1.00
02:36:55.000 Yes. 1.00
02:36:58.000 My grandmother's pussy. 1.00
02:37:00.000 My grandmother's asshole. 1.00
02:37:02.000 You think her pussy's bad? 1.00
02:37:04.000 Yo, my stepfather just died of AIDS or something. 1.00
02:37:11.000 He was still dying of AIDS? Well, he did.
02:37:15.000 And the part I thought was gross about it was that they cremated him and they threw his asses in the ocean. 0.99
02:37:23.000 And I just thought that was so nasty. 0.99
02:37:25.000 I was like, people fish there.
02:37:26.000 Is that good enough to kill the AIDS virus? 0.92
02:37:30.000 But this is where my ignorance comes in.
02:37:33.000 I'm like, do those ashes have AIDS on them?
02:37:37.000 How does that affect the beluga whales?
02:37:40.000 Which gets your age fish.
02:37:43.000 Catch an AIDS fish. 1.00
02:37:44.000 It already comes out filleted and shit. 1.00
02:37:46.000 Well, that's one of the things they found out about mad cow disease is that they would take the... 0.99
02:37:49.000 Like, when people got mad cow disease, which is called...
02:37:53.000 The boop. 0.87
02:37:55.000 Jacob's Crutzfeld or Crutzfeld Jacob, whichever one it is.
02:37:58.000 Who names?
02:37:59.000 I don't know.
02:37:59.000 I think it's probably two scientists.
02:38:01.000 But mad cow disease comes from something called prions. 0.84
02:38:05.000 And prions are...
02:38:06.000 It's like a thing that lives in your brain tissue.
02:38:10.000 And one of the things they found out was when they used instruments on people with mad cow disease, and then they tried to cook the mad cow disease off, like to sterilize it on these instruments, it didn't work. 0.98
02:38:21.000 So they would have them at a thousand degree temperature for hours, and the prions would stay alive, which is fucking insane.
02:38:31.000 So you could potentially develop this thing that doesn't die. 0.79
02:38:36.000 It's like an immortal disease.
02:38:41.000 Right.
02:38:42.000 So if they're just cremating someone, maybe that's not good enough for the AIDS virus.
02:38:46.000 Maybe it's good enough for AIDS virus, but not good enough for mad cow. 0.97
02:38:49.000 So if someone gets mad cow and they barbecue them and fucking cremate them and then throw them in the ocean, then the fish could get mad cow. 0.99
02:38:57.000 Or seals. 0.99
02:38:59.000 Or walruses. 1.00
02:39:00.000 Or maybe I'm a moron, I'm just making shit up. 1.00
02:39:03.000 Well, I like your fake news over China's fake news. 1.00
02:39:08.000 Butthole, probes.
02:39:10.000 Is it that hard to figure out whether or not people have COVID with a nose swab?
02:39:15.000 Yeah, I like what I did out there, just with the tickle of that.
02:39:19.000 More accurate, probably. 1.00
02:39:21.000 Oh, with the asshole? 0.99
02:39:22.000 How much more accurate do we need? 1.00
02:39:23.000 Remember they were saying we were going to check college dorms, the pipes, to see if...
02:39:27.000 They have been doing that.
02:39:28.000 Right, I mean, I didn't know you could even do that until COVID happened, so maybe it's...
02:39:32.000 Yeah, that's how they find out if people have it. 0.99
02:39:33.000 They check the shit. 0.99
02:39:34.000 Remember how crazy people was like at the beginning of COVID when people spraying down fucking their groceries and shit and cleaning them and stuff? 0.99
02:39:41.000 Oh, yeah. 0.99
02:39:42.000 People were wearing masks while they were driving.
02:39:44.000 Yeah.
02:39:45.000 I saw a guy wearing a mask driving yesterday.
02:39:47.000 Yeah.
02:39:47.000 Come on, son.
02:39:48.000 I wish I was driving next to that, dude. 0.99
02:39:50.000 I'm like, you're a bum. 0.99
02:39:51.000 Like, you're a bum. 0.99
02:39:53.000 It's just a weird way to drive around with masks and a glove. 0.91
02:39:56.000 Like, is this how we want to live?
02:39:58.000 And it's like...
02:40:01.000 How many people do you know that caught it?
02:40:05.000 Probably about like four people.
02:40:07.000 That's it?
02:40:08.000 Personally, yeah.
02:40:10.000 I know four people that caught it this week.
02:40:12.000 Really?
02:40:12.000 Yeah.
02:40:13.000 Oh, no, no, five.
02:40:14.000 Because Tony just caught it.
02:40:15.000 Yeah.
02:40:16.000 Tony had it for one day.
02:40:17.000 Yeah.
02:40:18.000 He said, my back kind of hurt.
02:40:20.000 That's it.
02:40:21.000 He didn't even think he had it.
02:40:23.000 Yeah.
02:40:23.000 He came in to get tested.
02:40:24.000 And I'm like, you got it, you fuck. 1.00
02:40:26.000 Get in the corner. 1.00
02:40:26.000 You got it. 1.00
02:40:27.000 We have a dunce chair in the corner.
02:40:29.000 Because the only people that have sat in it is Jamie and Tony.
02:40:31.000 Yeah.
02:40:32.000 And they've got the COVID. Yeah.
02:40:34.000 As soon as Jamie came in, I'm like, get in that corner!
02:40:36.000 You got the COVID, son!
02:40:38.000 Man, I had to... 0.96
02:40:39.000 When I had started doing those apartment shows and shit, people were like, well, I'm not gonna...
02:40:46.000 Because that was a concern of people. 0.64
02:40:47.000 Like, well, I'm not gonna catch this and this and that.
02:40:50.000 I had to tell people, like, yo, I already had it.
02:40:52.000 You know, just so people...
02:40:55.000 It's over, and I've deep-washed my apartment, and I come over here and stuff like that.
02:40:59.000 Now, I actually took an antibody test. 0.99
02:41:06.000 Yeah, a girl pricked my fucking finger and shit, and I didn't have any. 1.00
02:41:11.000 I was cool. 1.00
02:41:13.000 And then right after that, maybe like a week later, I don't know if it was the COVID, but I came down with something crazy, and I was real fucking weak, and I was sweating in bed, but I could still taste shit. 0.99
02:41:27.000 Well, that doesn't mean you definitely lose your taste. 0.99
02:41:30.000 Oh, okay.
02:41:31.000 Yeah, you might have had it.
02:41:32.000 But here's the thing.
02:41:33.000 It's like regular colds are still around. 1.00
02:41:35.000 Well, I killed that shit. 1.00
02:41:35.000 Of course you did. 1.00
02:41:37.000 You're healthy.
02:41:38.000 Most healthy people are going to sail through this.
02:41:40.000 The people that I know that have gotten it, every one of them, like one of my friends, she got it.
02:41:45.000 She was no sickness at all.
02:41:47.000 She didn't feel a thing.
02:41:49.000 Chappelle didn't have any symptoms.
02:41:50.000 My friend Raheem, no symptoms, no nothing.
02:41:53.000 But my friend CK, he had it, and he had, apparently, I just talked to him, he was six days in, and he still has some symptoms. 1.00
02:42:01.000 Did they take a test and be like, oh fuck, I got that shit? 0.99
02:42:07.000 The Chappelle shows that we were doing out here, they all got shut down. 1.00
02:42:10.000 It was someone that Dave knew outside of the show that was careless.
02:42:15.000 It had nothing to do with the show.
02:42:17.000 We were testing the whole audience, and we test all the performers.
02:42:21.000 And everyone was clean, but...
02:42:22.000 Someone had come in contact with some other people that had come in contact with Dave.
02:42:26.000 It was a careless person that had nothing to do with the performance.
02:42:30.000 And then a bunch of people got it, and it spread through.
02:42:35.000 Apparently, I was supposed to be on the Friday show, Friday and Saturday.
02:42:38.000 And then Thursday, they were there to do the show, and they canceled the show while the audience was seated.
02:42:44.000 The audience was seated, the band was playing, and I guess a bunch of people had tested positive, and they had to shut the show down.
02:42:51.000 Right here at Stubbs?
02:42:52.000 Yep, right here at Stubbs. 1.00
02:42:53.000 Damn. 1.00
02:42:54.000 That shit crazy, man. 1.00
02:42:56.000 It's weird. 1.00
02:42:56.000 But what's weird is that none of them got any symptoms. 1.00
02:43:00.000 And it's so funny.
02:43:01.000 It's like, I still don't even know if that was it, you know?
02:43:05.000 Right.
02:43:06.000 I bet it was it.
02:43:08.000 Huh?
02:43:08.000 I bet it was it, but you won't be able to find out now.
02:43:10.000 Like, Jamie, you don't have antibodies anymore, right?
02:43:13.000 Oh, you did?
02:43:14.000 Oh, you already had it?
02:43:15.000 Or did you take the vaccine?
02:43:16.000 Did you get tested yesterday for antibodies?
02:43:17.000 Yeah.
02:43:18.000 Okay, we had an antibody test that we did yesterday.
02:43:20.000 You taking that vaccine?
02:43:24.000 I mean, I would if I felt like I needed it.
02:43:28.000 But I just feel like if you maintain your health, and I think for some people it's important.
02:43:33.000 I think for some people it's good.
02:43:35.000 Are they going to make people take it in order to go overseas?
02:43:37.000 I'm worried about that.
02:43:39.000 I don't like needles.
02:43:41.000 I want to know how people fare over X amount of months.
02:43:48.000 What happens in six months after the vaccine?
02:43:51.000 How long does it last for?
02:43:53.000 Do you need it again next year? 1.00
02:43:55.000 Didn't a chick faint on national TV for taking that motherfucking vaccine? 1.00
02:43:58.000 Yeah, but apparently she faints whenever she gets a needle, which is hilarious. 1.00
02:44:01.000 They chose her.
02:44:02.000 Because that does happen.
02:44:03.000 I knew a girl who would see, she would see movies, a girl I was dating, she would see a movie where a dude was shooting up and she'd black out. 0.68
02:44:11.000 Faint.
02:44:12.000 In a movie theater.
02:44:13.000 We went to the movies, and someone was shooting up in the movie theater, and she blacked out.
02:44:16.000 I was like, what is happening here?
02:44:17.000 I remember when I was like 17, and I was walking down the street.
02:44:22.000 I was walking down the street, and I saw a man doing heroin.
02:44:25.000 Whoa.
02:44:26.000 He was doing heroin.
02:44:26.000 It was an old junkie.
02:44:28.000 He was doing heroin.
02:44:29.000 And I just looked over, and I was just like... 1.00
02:44:32.000 Damn! 0.99
02:44:33.000 That's a crazy way to get high. 1.00
02:44:35.000 And I just kept walking. 0.99
02:44:37.000 I was like, damn! 0.99
02:44:38.000 What's crazy is when they get to the point where they're shooting into the same vein over and over again and then they get gangrene. 1.00
02:44:43.000 Dude, that shit is sad. 1.00
02:44:45.000 That's what happened to Mitch Hedberg. 1.00
02:44:46.000 Mitch Hedberg was in the hospital at one point in time because he had been shooting into the same spot and he developed a horrible infection.
02:44:56.000 He still has one of my, probably my favorite joke of all time I've ever heard.
02:45:02.000 And it's so simple. 0.99
02:45:03.000 That motherfucker said, I don't got a girlfriend. 1.00
02:45:06.000 I just know a girl who'd be really mad if I said that. 1.00
02:45:11.000 I was like, perfect!
02:45:14.000 Did you know him?
02:45:16.000 Yeah.
02:45:17.000 Not well, but I met him and hung out with him a little bit.
02:45:20.000 He was friends with Stan Hope.
02:45:21.000 He was one of the best at non sequiturs because he could do a whole hour, but it was like one joke that had nothing to do with the next joke, had nothing to do with the next joke, and he wrote constantly, constantly writing.
02:45:33.000 He was brilliant, man.
02:45:34.000 Just so unusual, too.
02:45:36.000 No one liked that guy.
02:45:38.000 He was so unique.
02:45:40.000 And his tone, it was jazz.
02:45:43.000 I don't know, but I know a girl who'd be really mad if I said that. 1.00
02:45:46.000 Speaking of jazz, did you ever listen to the one album that he had where they played music in the background?
02:45:51.000 That was amazing. 0.99
02:45:53.000 Brilliant fucking one-liners, bro. 1.00
02:45:55.000 Comedy, brother. 1.00
02:45:56.000 It's the best.
02:45:57.000 It unites us, brings us together, and it's bringing you to Austin! 0.99
02:46:01.000 Only if you bring that punching machine, nigga. 1.00
02:46:04.000 You know I'm here, bro. 0.99
02:46:05.000 You got it.
02:46:05.000 Punch machine.
02:46:06.000 Hey, brother, thank you very much for being here.
02:46:08.000 Yo, man, thank you so much, Joe.
02:46:09.000 I really appreciate it, man.
02:46:10.000 Always good to see you.
02:46:11.000 Great to see you again.
02:46:12.000 Yes, sir, man.
02:46:12.000 Thank you for bringing us out here.
02:46:14.000 My pleasure.
02:46:14.000 Tell everybody your Instagram, your Twitter.
02:46:16.000 Twitter doesn't work right now.
02:46:18.000 I got a new Twitter.
02:46:19.000 I got a new Twitter.
02:46:20.000 What's the new Twitter?
02:46:21.000 My new Twitter is Jamar Malachi.
02:46:24.000 M-A-L-A-C-H-I. And it says my unsuspended account and my Twitter account.
02:46:29.000 And my Instagram is jamar underscore neighbors.
02:46:32.000 And I also have a YouTube channel, you know, uploading some podcasts. 0.99
02:46:37.000 My damn self. 1.00
02:46:38.000 Support the dinosaur. 1.00
02:46:39.000 Goddamn right, baby. 0.96
02:46:40.000 Got podcasts, got everything. 0.91
02:46:41.000 Hilarious stand-up comic.
02:46:43.000 Thank you so much, John.
02:46:43.000 I really appreciate your time.
02:46:44.000 Appreciate you, man.
02:46:45.000 Appreciate you.
02:46:45.000 Bye, everybody.
02:46:46.000 Bye, guys.