In this episode, the boys talk about the new equipment they got in the garage, the craziness that's coming, and the crazy things we've been up to in the past week. Also, we talk about guns and how to keep them safe in the house. We don't need them, but it's a good thing they have them, right? Don't Tell Mom: e. Subscribe, Like, and Share to stay up to date with what's going on in the world of podcasting and social media. If you like what you hear, please HIT SUBSCRIBE and leave us a rating and review on Apple Podcasts and other podcasting apps! Also, if you don't like the audio quality on the podcast, please tell us what you think about it and we'll make it better for you in the next episode. Thank you so much for all your support and stay tuned for more episodes coming soon. XOXOXOXO - The Crew xoxo - P.S. We'll be back with a new episode next week! - The Boys - Tom and Matt and much more! Xoxo- The Crew XOXO- The Boys - Tom & Matt and the crew at The Crew at The Boys Podcast & the Crew at P.A.B. - Ben & Ben xoxOXO (The Crew at the Podcast! and The Boys at The Garage is back with some new equipment and gear coming soon! (Thank you for all the support you've been so far, we appreciate all the love, support, support and support us, thank you, support us and the support we've gotten so far this past week, and we're looking forward to all the hard work, we can't wait to see what we can do in the future, we're going to do more in the coming weeks, we'll keep you all the more support, we hope you'll keep up the next week, we've got a chance to keep up to see how much support, keep up with you guys, more support we'll get more of you all of your support, more of support you'll see you, we love you, and more of our support, etc., etc., we'll see ya'll, we will see you soon, we won't be back next week. Thank you, guys! - Tom, Tom, and Ben
00:01:34.000So this is some new shit we got to make the sound better for you iTunes people, and thank you very much for putting up with it up to this far.
00:01:40.000And I appreciate all your suggestions, and I know people get harsh with their criticisms, but...
00:01:44.000The bottom line is that's your real opinion, and I appreciate it.
00:02:01.000Of course, we have this, and then we also have...
00:02:05.000I'll have to hold on to this for a second.
00:02:06.000We bought some Sirius Sennheiser microphones, just like you would use in a recording studio.
00:02:11.000So, at the end of the day, when all is said and done, alcohol swabs.
00:02:15.000Alcohol swabs to disinfect it in between guests.
00:02:18.000We're going to clean that shit off and make it all nice, nice.
00:02:20.000We don't want any guests getting the herbs.
00:02:24.000So, we're turning this thing into a real production studio.
00:02:28.000We're going to have cameras on tripods and the whole deal, and I'm Stealing a page out of Anthony Cumia's book.
00:02:34.000Anthony Cumia is one of the dudes from Opie and Anthony.
00:02:38.000Super cool guy and he does a badass radio show from his house.
00:02:42.000And he's one of the ones that gave me really the first inspiration to do it because I saw his setup and his setup is fucking badass.
00:02:49.000He has it set up basically just like a real radio show, you know, with like real jamming microphones and he has a backdrop and a green screen.
00:02:57.000So I'm basically stealing all Anthony's idea with his blessing and with all due credit.
00:03:35.000That he wants to do that all the time.
00:03:36.000I have guns, and I appreciate you wanting to shoot them and use them, and it's good to have something in the house to protect yourself, because there's a lot of crazy fucks out there, but carrying one everywhere is just a little strange.
00:06:07.000When you talk for hours at a time, they're talking for like four hours at a time, there's gonna be times when you're doing something that sucks.
00:06:18.000I gotta talk about it because I think it's very crazy, especially if you're following it through TMZ. If you don't know, and if you don't know, tell everybody what this is.
00:06:26.000Well, supposedly Tito was just arrested for allegedly beating up Jenna Jameson.
00:06:30.000And then he came out and said, I never hit her.
00:06:38.000She's fucked up on drugs, and that's it.
00:06:41.000So what I thought, I thought that was just weird, and then I was watching this clip on TMZ where it was Jenna saying, he did not beat me up.
00:06:47.000We had an altercation, but he did not beat me up.
00:06:51.000People were thinking he's a wife beater.
00:06:53.000Then, like a half hour later, an hour later, Tito puts out a press conference saying, hey, she is fucked up on Oxycontin.
00:07:00.000And then immediately her story now is wearing an arm brace, he beat me up and threw me in a hot tub.
00:07:06.000I think she had the arm brace even in the beginning.
00:07:59.000We've talked before on this show about a documentary, and we'll just briefly say it.
00:08:03.000If you haven't seen it, just Google the OxyContin Express, and it's all about...
00:08:09.000How many people are addicted to this stuff in Florida with their wacky laws?
00:08:14.000Florida doesn't have a database of doctors.
00:08:16.000So the way my friend did it, he got a prescription in Texas, and he got a prescription here in California, and then he started using both of them at the same time, getting both of them refilled, and I got all fucking loony.
00:08:25.000But in Florida, you can go to like a hundred doctors.
00:08:28.000They don't have a database of doctors.
00:10:02.000But this fucking guy that's been banging Larry King's wife is the biggest bitch out of all of them.
00:10:08.000This fucking guy, okay, was the baseball coach for Larry King's kids, okay?
00:10:14.000He starts banging Larry King's wife, and he's banging Larry King's wife in Larry King's bed while Larry King's show is being filmed.
00:10:22.000Because Larry King wants to know where his wife is at all times, so he makes her watch the show, at least according to this guy, so that he can quit.
00:10:36.000So he's banging her, and as he's banging her, she's like watching the show, making sure she pays attention to what, you know, fucking Paris Hilton has to say.
00:13:22.000I don't think ratting out, at least not when you're in a situation where you're not only ratting them out to whatever, authorities, you're ratting them out to every single person in the world.
00:13:31.000And when you're in a field where you are based off your persona, she makes money of who she is, and she's playing a role.
00:13:39.000Right, so you think he fucked up by talking shit.
00:13:42.000He just destroyed her Tiger Woods style in front of Twitter, in front of everybody, in front of everything, her career.
00:14:18.000I've been in situations where people have accused me of things that I haven't done, and I know people that have been accused of rape, and I know...
00:15:08.000Take the dick out first and then, you know.
00:15:10.000But no, so one time, it was like, it was always one of those things, like, I'd break up with her, and then I was like, oh god, she has big tits, I got, you know, oh, gotta fuck her again.
00:15:19.000But then one time, it was like six months, we go by, she's just trying and trying, and finally I'm like, alright, look, it's my sister's birthday this weekend, we're gonna go out and have some drinks if you wanna come out, but you have to be cool, you know, you can't, you know, whatever.
00:15:30.000And so she came out fucking stupid, it was blackout drunk, fucking embarrassing people, you know, I had to like, Get her in the car and stuff.
00:15:39.000Get back to my house and I'm like, look, I'm going to bed.
00:15:42.000You can crash downstairs or I can call you a cab or something, but you're not allowed to drive.
00:15:47.000And she goes, I'm fucking driving, yeah!
00:15:50.000Starts breaking my shit, just destroying my house.
00:15:53.000I'm talking about taking picture frames and smashing it, throwing things.
00:15:57.000I had this huge dent in my refrigerator where she threw something at my refrigerator.
00:17:05.000Then I woke up in the morning, casually went downstairs making coffee, get a doorbell, ring the door, open the door, and the cops go, hey Brian, damn, we wish you wouldn't answer the door.
00:18:00.000So anyways, I got all these charges against me.
00:18:03.000And then I had to go to court, spend, I think it was $20,000 in court fees.
00:18:09.000I had to go to all these different things.
00:18:11.000I had to go to a psychiatrist that they made you go to.
00:18:15.000And this is, by the way, all nicknamed the O.J. Simpson Law.
00:18:18.000Because after the O.J. Simpson trial, they now have a woman, if a woman wanted to, she could go through the phone book and go, arrest this person.
00:20:52.000Right when I did that, the next day after the trial where they ended it and say, all right, disorderly contact, pay a ticket, she called me.
00:21:00.000She goes, I want you to know I'm so sorry about this.
00:21:02.000I actually didn't press charges or anything.
00:21:04.000The police pressed charges and they wouldn't let me, they wouldn't drop the charges.
00:21:32.000There's a lot of people that do a lot of fucked up things to human beings, for sure, and there should be laws to protect people, but we don't know who's telling the fucking truth.
00:21:40.000And if you run in bad circles and you hang out with crazy bitches, you could have a bad situation.
00:22:17.000I know people that are in relationships that they fucking hate.
00:22:21.000And it's almost always people that had really fucked up parents.
00:22:25.000It's almost always people that had parents that fought and for some reason they think that it's normal.
00:22:31.000And especially when you're young, they kind of like it.
00:22:33.000Because they think it makes them feel like an adult, like they're doing adult type shit like their parents did.
00:22:38.000They're fucking screaming and yelling at each other.
00:22:40.000There's been many times, especially when I was way, way younger, my early days before I I had a grip on the type of girls to date and the type of girls not to date.
00:23:26.000Otherwise, sex was all I thought about all fucking day.
00:23:30.000You know, nature has you primed for that.
00:23:32.000Nature has it set up so that if you're not fucking, okay, and if you're like 17, 18 years old and you're not fucking, that's all you're going to be thinking about.
00:23:39.000You're not going to be able to concentrate on anything.
00:24:02.000But when you're 30-something years old and you've been around the block a few times, then it becomes a matter of, okay, who's the dummy here?
00:24:21.000A lot of people don't like weed, but here's one of the things that weed is really good for.
00:24:26.000If you smoke weed and get paranoid and you start freaking out about things, almost always those things that you're freaking out about are things that are in your subconscious that you're not comfortable about.
00:24:36.000The things that have been bothering you for a long time and you've been just trying to push them to the back of your head.
00:24:42.000And when you smoke pot, whatever it is about pot, especially when you get too hot, There's a quality to marijuana that makes you think about shit that you're suppressing.
00:24:52.000It makes you think about things from your past that you don't like.
00:24:55.000It makes you think about things that you did.
00:24:57.000And it makes you think about your own issues.
00:25:01.000Especially marijuana and the isolation tank together.
00:26:43.000And about having good relationships, like the best way to have a good relationship, you've got to be comfortable with who the fuck you are.
00:26:51.000And if you've got a lot of issues, a lot of stuff that's bothering you, that's going to fuck up any chance you have of communicating well with other people.
00:26:59.000Because as soon as you're comfortable with another person, when you first meet someone, you don't really let them in and you sort of project who you want to be to this person.
00:27:06.000And then the person does the same thing to you.
00:27:08.000But after like a few months or a few weeks, depending on, you know, how good your act is, most people, you get to know who the fuck they really are and what their real issues are, you know, after a while.
00:27:17.000When they start yelling at you, when they get upset at you for no reason or something, you start like tuning it all in and going, oh, okay, you're fucking bananas.
00:27:23.000You know, you gotta not be bananas in order to get someone who's not bananas.
00:27:27.000Like, dudes will always say, like, yeah, man, I'm fucking trying to find a good girl, dude.
00:28:48.000Another thing is like TMZ type shit, like revealing all sorts of information about your personal life because people are creepy and they want to look into it.
00:30:01.000I guess you have to be when you do that.
00:30:03.000Yeah, well, you know, he grew up in a situation where he had a douchebag for a stepfather and, you know, his whole life has been trying to fight against people that are fucking with him.
00:31:57.000We were in Ikea though the other day and they had like a kid's room like it was like a bunk bed and I was real happy but then there was like a place for a baby and I'm like wait is this just like a Is this a poor person with only one bedroom and had to share sister and baby?
00:32:11.000Or is this like, no, this girl has a baby and she's like 15?
00:32:15.000Oh my god, she's in a bunk bed and she's got a crib there?
00:32:35.000With this economy being the shitter the way it is, people are stacking more people into houses together.
00:32:41.000I know a person that lives down the street from me is losing their house.
00:32:44.000People are losing their houses left and right.
00:32:47.000People who have a really highfalutin lifestyle and spend tons of money and get used to it and get used to trying to bling-bling and then the shit hits the fan.
00:32:55.000I was thinking about moving the other day.
00:32:57.000Just you get sick of a place and you just want to upgrade.
00:32:59.000You always feel like you have to upgrade your shit.
00:33:01.000I tore out all my carpet, have like wood floors underneath it.
00:33:33.000The other thing is you build a base though.
00:33:36.000I have a base in LA. I have all my friends live in LA. My wife's friends live in LA. I have my whole system set up where I buy my dog food.
00:34:58.000Everyone in the audience was like these weird people from this area of Woonsocket, Rhode Island, but there was this one dude who was there who was a construction worker from New Jersey, and he just happened to be in town because there was a marriage or something like that, a wedding that he had to go to for, you know, some of his family, and he was bored, so he got out of the house to go have a beer.
00:35:16.000There's a bar down the street, so he goes to this Jack and Jill strip club, and he was a totally normal dude, and me and him were talking, having beers, like, well, he goes, what the fuck are we witnessing?
00:35:47.000I had two female pit bulls, and one of them killed the other one.
00:35:50.000They would fight and I would separate them and I thought they worked their shit out because the way dogs work their shit out is one dog will dominate the other dog and then you figure out who the alpha is.
00:36:19.000They would always come back and try to battle it out again.
00:36:22.000And that's what they did until one of them killed the other one.
00:36:25.000And I think that's how women are with women, man.
00:36:27.000I think women can be friends with women, and they have really close friends, and they go all sex in the city and pal around together and shit like that.
00:36:34.000But it's real difficult for them to make that kind of a bond.
00:37:33.000For sure you're going to get dominated.
00:37:35.000Everybody gets dominated in the beginning.
00:37:36.000Nobody, unless you're just so big that nobody can touch you, some 300-pound Brock Lesnar character, you know, you're going to get tapped out in the beginning.
00:37:43.000So you have to have the kind of ego to deal with that.
00:37:45.000But for women, I don't know, I think it's much more difficult.
00:37:49.000It was really difficult for my wife, especially when you have a little baby.
00:38:04.000I got some guy fucking cornered me at the supermarket the other day.
00:38:07.000Some dude that I guess I'd met him before, but I forgot.
00:38:10.000You know, there's some law that you can only or there's some studies that say that you can only keep like 150 people that you know in your head.
00:38:19.000No, I haven't seen that, but I totally believe it because I think mine's like 10. Seriously, I don't know if it's from weed or I just don't care.
00:38:27.000There's so many things when I'll meet somebody or somebody tells me something and if I don't care about it, I put that on the coffee table and that's about to get thrown out.
00:38:47.000There's, I don't know, working memory.
00:38:53.000I'm trying to find it on Google, and I don't want to waste too much time looking for this.
00:38:57.000Apparently, you can only have real relationships where you know 150 people, where you know their name.
00:39:05.000You only have a certain amount of space in your hard drive when it comes to human beings.
00:39:10.000That, to me, reinforces my feelings that human beings are supposed to live in small tribes.
00:39:15.000We're not supposed to live in these gigantic You know, fucking tribes of hundreds of millions of people.
00:39:21.000Well, it's also, if you ever get a Simon Says, you know, where you follow the colors, it also is a, I don't know if it's a, we're supposed to live in small tribes, as in, if I can do Simon Says, but right up to like the 14th one, My brain falls off and it's always like the 14th one.
00:39:39.000It's almost like that's just my max, you know, like that's my hard drives full.
00:39:43.000I can't do anything past this 14. I might be able to train myself to to like micromanage how many things I can remember.
00:42:14.000I don't have time to break all this shit down for you.
00:42:17.000If it's helping you, that's all well and good.
00:42:19.000But just running up to people and thinking you're going to save them in the parking lot because you couldn't get your shit together, you don't have to save me.
00:42:27.000And if you really truly believe that the only way I'm going to get to go to heaven is Kirk Cameron style, where you have to accept the Lord.
00:42:36.000You ever seen Kirk Cameron go up to gangbangers?
00:42:38.000You gotta Google that shit on YouTube.
00:42:40.000Watch Kirk Cameron's videos where he goes up to people and uses his fucking 13-year-old logic.
00:42:46.000He uses like fucking 7th grade logic on these people.
00:42:49.000When you Google it, type in Kirk Cameron owned video.
00:43:41.000You know, what sucks is I used to like him back in the day with the show, with the growing pains, but I also thought that Tracy Gold was hot, so I guess I'm just stupid.
00:44:57.000Yeah, but I bet those are, it's really hard to be a born, like, never learned it growing up and then going straight into it.
00:45:02.000I don't think it is if your life falls apart.
00:45:03.000I think if your life falls apart and all these people that are into Jesus seem happy and they seem like they have a path, because that's really what it's all about, man.
00:45:12.000And today, people, if you think about the way we used to live, the way our bodies are programmed to live, I mean, we're supposed to be living, you know, in fucking huts and caves and shit.
00:45:23.000I mean, the hardware that we have right now, It's basically the same hardware, the same adrenal system, the same neurosynapses that connect the same way as people that lived 100,000 years ago.
00:45:35.000If you took a person from 100,000 years ago and sat him in the corner right there, he would be unrecognizable.
00:47:10.000Dude, you think about the way we are wired.
00:47:14.000We are not wired to deal with this world that we live in right now.
00:47:17.000We are wired to deal with thousands of years ago.
00:47:20.000Fucking 1830-something was when they figured out the camera.
00:47:24.000That means everything before less than 200 years ago, if you want to know what someone looked like, someone had to draw that person for you.
00:49:09.000Lower levels of vitamin D at higher latitudes where the sun is less intense caused a lightning effect where modern humans who began darker skin first migrated north.
00:49:20.000So human beings have been black until about 50,000 years ago when we started moving around.
00:50:28.000You know, Penn Gillette said something on his Twitter today, and I'm paraphrasing, but basically said the measure of a religion is how much you're afraid, you know, what you can say about a religion is how much you're afraid to talk about them, or when you're afraid to talk about them.
00:50:43.000Like, how crazy they are, basically what he's saying.
00:50:46.000And Penn is a A very staunch atheist and I've been friends with that guy for a long time.
00:50:51.000He won't even consider the possibility that there's some sort of an intelligent life to it all.
00:50:56.000He's very scientific, but unfortunately he's never done any psychedelic drugs.
00:51:04.000He's never even had a single drug except for when he's had to have surgery when they had to drug him.
00:51:08.000He takes it very seriously to be sober all the time.
00:51:12.000Which is not well and good, but I think you can't really understand what's happening in the psychedelic experience unless you've had one.
00:51:20.000Point is, this fucking Muhammad thing, man.
00:51:23.000I like how they compared it, I don't know if they did it in the second episode, and the first thing they compared it to, Tom Cruise suing anyone that says he's gay.
00:51:31.000It's kind of like the Muhammad thing, you know, where he's like, what, you're not allowed to talk about him being gay?
00:51:37.000Listen, I'm going to tell you right now, you can talk about me being gay all day long.
00:53:26.000And it just sits there, and it starts off, it's like, all about this dog, and then it's just like, crazy stuff's going on in the background that this cute dog's watching.
00:53:35.000Like, it's watching two people fuck, it's watching somebody get murdered, it's like, it's all about this cute little dog watching all this horrific shit.
00:53:44.000And it only got to two episodes, and even though they said they were allowed to do anything they wanted, they're like, this is too fucked up, we quit.
00:53:56.000Best two videos I've ever seen in my life and I wish Trey Parker and Matt Stone would finish that because it was one of the funniest things I've ever seen.
00:55:23.000I wanted to fucking puke and beat people up because it was so Dude, his last movie looked like, like, you know those movies where they have a guy who used to be funny and then all of a sudden, like in the movie, he takes a terrible turn and he's not funny anymore.
00:55:41.000He's putting out crap and the people are shaking their heads and he's in the down spiral of his life.
00:55:45.000That last movie where he played the Indian guy, the love guru.
00:55:58.000It's like, this is like a guy who forgot what funny is, and it's just like...
00:56:02.000But what's crazy is you go back as far as Swipe, Married, and Axe Murder, which was way before Austin Powers or any of that stuff, it destroyed that movie.
00:56:11.000Because that was the same character as all his other movies.
00:56:43.000If you don't know about this, the iPhone, they have an iPhone 4 that came out, and it's like some crazy-ass new iPhone with a front-facing camera, and well, apparently some dude, and this is the story, and a lot of people think that this is all bullshit and hype, and it's just, you know, making the iPhone story bigger.
00:57:00.000I personally don't, because I don't think Apple would ever release a thing on purpose, you know, and have people find it.
00:57:10.000A lot of companies, the viral marketing nowadays that's being used on the internet is so amazingly deep and you would not think of the shit that's happening right now.
00:57:22.000Like Chuckle Dale and the Reebok commercial?
00:57:23.000Exactly, where he's naked and all that stuff.
00:57:26.000I could almost see this to build hype with cell phones because if you look, there's a website called boygeniusreport.com and you could totally tell this guy's in bed or he was in bed with Blackberry at one point.
00:57:39.000Like, there was times where it was like, alright, you got this phone like a year ahead of anybody else and you already have it and have already a video of using it and stuff like that.
00:58:21.000They paid $5,000 for the actual phone.
00:58:25.000So they paid money for the phone, and apparently Apple's saying that that's their stolen property, and you're not supposed to be having that reporting on it.
00:58:41.000I mean, he's the main editor of one of the biggest tech websites.
00:58:45.000Not only does he get free shit, what I'm more interested in is imagine somebody coming to your house, taking your computer, and took everything.
01:00:09.000I think basically they fucked up in stealing the phone or in buying the phone.
01:00:14.000What they should have done is given the fucking phone back to Apple.
01:00:17.000I mean, the company doesn't want you reviewing their shit before it's out yet.
01:00:20.000I mean, I don't think that's a huge request.
01:00:23.000If you know that it's their shit, you're doing something illegal.
01:00:26.000I think they more fucked up Gizmodo, more fucked up just letting everyone know who the guy who lost it is, putting his face on their website.
01:00:35.000Yeah, they took pictures of Homeboy and everything.
01:01:02.000If you think AT&T's service sucks a big bag of dicks now, wait until that front-facing camera comes out and everyone everywhere is going to be fucking you streaming while they're driving their car, talking, singing the fucking Black Eyed Peas.
01:01:34.000It's going to be, what channel is your life?
01:01:37.000You're going to have a fucking helmet on, and there's going to be a front-facing camera that shows you, as you're walking through the world...
01:01:44.000You're going to have a video camera broadcasting everything you do.
01:01:47.000That's kind of like what Ustream does and what Justin TV does.
01:01:51.000You know, Justin TV originally was called life casting, which was 24 hours a day following around Justin, who had a camera filming his whole entire life.
01:02:00.000Do you remember when we were in San Francisco and Justin TV was going to give us a laptop and a backpack with a cellular connection?
01:02:34.000I have enough problems with people YouTubing my shit before it's done at shows.
01:02:40.000When you come up with new bits, you know, like sometimes when a bit like is out and it's on a CD, you know, that's to me when it's an old bit.
01:02:49.000But if I got bits that aren't on, they haven't been on television, haven't been on CD, and you're like, oh, I've seen that bit.
01:03:06.000So when they were like, we want to Ustream your whole show, I'm like, you can't Ustream my show.
01:03:12.000Because when the material comes out, I want at least the majority of people watching the television show, other than the people that have seen me in the clubs, I want it to be new shit.
01:03:20.000I want the DVD to be all shit that's not on another DVD. And it's not going to work that way if there's fucking these Ustream clips and Justin TV shows everywhere.
01:03:31.000So I thought the whole thing was too much.
01:03:33.000And it's not that entertaining to broadcast every fucking thing you do.
01:03:37.000I mean, with this show, I think we sit down, we do it for two hours, we bang it out, and that's it.
01:03:43.000You don't want to just keep having content.
01:03:47.000Where you water down what people are watching.
01:04:07.000Because when the internet was new, that was actually kind of cool back in the day.
01:04:11.000She would have three cameras that would just refresh every ten seconds.
01:04:14.000But I got addicted to watching it because it was so weird She would come home, talk to the husband, they would make dinner, then they would bring the camera into the bedroom and have sex.
01:04:24.000That's the part I like the most, obviously.
01:06:02.000I mean, it makes you wonder about Mad Max and shit like that.
01:06:06.000When peak oil comes and people are fucking driving biodiesel cars down the street that they made fucking corn fuel out of and fucking shooting at people trying to get fresh water.
01:06:18.000I wonder if that really could go down like that.
01:11:31.000And right now, they're in this shadow organization of the UFC. It's a small organization.
01:11:35.000It doesn't get nearly as much attention as the UFC... I wish we absorbed them.
01:11:41.000I wish we had, if it was up to me, obviously it's not.
01:11:43.000There's a lot of business contracts and all sorts of jazz, but it would be the coolest thing in the world to be able to call those lighter weight fights.
01:11:51.000Uriah Faber fought Jose Aldo in the main event for the featherweight title.
01:12:40.000Their foot works really good and they kick really hard.
01:12:43.000And he's just so good at moving in and out.
01:12:45.000You know, soccer is all about moving side to side, quick moves to deal with the ball.
01:12:50.000And those guys that are real good at soccer, man, that really translates well to being able to kick, you know, throwing leg kicks and getting out of the way of leg kicks and just the ability to spring forward and spring back.
01:13:02.000Soccer is a fucking tremendous place to start, tremendous base for certain types of fighting, especially for like Muay Thai.
01:13:10.000You know, you guys saying Tito Ortiz and Jenna, we already talked about that, bitch.
01:13:13.000You're going to have to go to the recording and rewind that shit, son.
01:13:17.000We can't just be talking about it over and over.
01:15:00.000It's incredible that here we are in 2010, and there's people out there that really believe that you shouldn't have a drawing that represents their guy, their messiah, their prophet.
01:15:12.000And the funny thing is, this fucking guy, I said that once, and this guy emailed me.
01:15:16.000Hey, dumbass, the reason why you're not allowed to is because they don't want you worshipping false idols and imagery.
01:15:22.000Like, okay, I'm a dumbass, so you think it's okay to kill people because someone's drawing some fucking...
01:15:27.000A guy that may or may not have even existed.
01:15:31.000When you go back a couple thousand years, when you go back a thousand years plus, man, who the fuck knows what really happened?
01:17:03.000I love people that are really into UFOs and shit.
01:17:07.000They talk about images that are on cave walls.
01:17:10.000Have you ever seen the images on cave walls?
01:17:12.000They're like flying saucers and aliens on the cave walls.
01:17:15.000How do you know those fucking, how do you know those cave guys didn't just eat a mess of mushrooms that they found, trip their balls off, just start drawing loony shit that comes to their mind?
01:17:23.000What if it was like a children's book for their small kid?
01:20:35.000The werewolf though wasn't like your father or anything like that?
01:20:39.000No, I just was, I think I was an angry kid and I was always obsessed with the idea that you could, I think what represented to me was like, you know, that You could be calm and normal and then some shit happens and just...
01:22:38.000You go to a movie, you enjoy yourself, you have a good time, it takes you someplace, it gives you some thrills, you know, there's a lot of shit, you don't know what's happening, things get resolved, how's this gonna, what's gonna go down...
01:22:51.000And the idea that your entertainment, because it represents things that happen in real life, is somehow or another superior to superheroes or monsters.
01:23:52.000My dream was to do comic book illustrations, and he was telling me, Basically, you need to have skills because you're not going to reach those dreams.
01:24:03.000And what if you have a job that's just you as an illustrator doing boring stuff?
01:25:22.000People that can influence your children and people that say mean shit.
01:25:26.000I will never forget I had a math teacher in high school who was just fucking boring and the class was boring and she was this black lady who had a black accent.
01:25:36.000Like, she would mispronounce words all the time.
01:26:28.000That's so that was like the beginning of my time as a stand-up comedian because I felt like I was defending myself Like I wasn't doing anything to you.
01:26:35.000I'll just sit there scribbling in my notebook You know, I just wasn't paying attention because I was bored out of my fucking head and I had problems with authority But she just you know like to be the the lady to call on you if you ain't paying attention You know, like she would you would get mad, but I mean meanwhile this fucking bitch couldn't even speak, right?
01:26:51.000She said both Would you like to come up here and do both of these?
01:26:57.000It's like, in my mind, it's like a movie playing out.
01:26:59.000Because the anger in my head that this fucking dummy was trying to make me look dumb in front of everybody just because I was scribbling and I wasn't paying attention to your...
01:27:07.000My opinion on math was always like, okay, math is very essential, but...
01:27:19.000There's only a finite amount of things to pay attention to in the day, and I don't give a fuck about these wacky equations that you're making me solve and figure out.
01:27:26.000I know how to add, I know how to divide, I know how to multiply.
01:28:27.000And he started talking about all the pollution that's involved in Lake Erie.
01:28:30.000And I said, well, actually, I just saw a documentary that was on PBS that was talking about the resurgence of Lake Erie, about how Lake Erie, they've worked very hard to filter out the water, and they've done all these different things to cut down the pollutants, and they've seen a resurgence in the fish population, and he got all fucking mad at me.
01:28:46.000And I was like, have you seen this documentary?
01:29:37.000And I had one, an anthropology teacher, who was obsessed with Jane Goodall and the monkeys.
01:29:42.000You know, Jane Goodall lived with chimpanzees.
01:29:44.000So I drew this one kid who was this football player, who was a nice kid, but he was always kissing her ass because he wanted her to like him so he could get better grades.
01:30:16.000I'd always make fun of his farts because he had really bad farts.
01:30:20.000And then one time they pulled the whole class out and they were like, Alright, Omar has really bad gas because of his diet and it's not funny.
01:30:28.000And if you guys make fun of it anymore, you guys are all going to be in trouble.
01:30:32.000I remember this speech, so of course then I only drew Omar for the rest of the year after all this Indian guy farting on people and stuff like that.
01:30:40.000How ridiculous is that you're telling kids not to make fun of farts because it's not funny?
01:33:13.000That can see a place, like, just look out the window at a city and then draw the city in exact detail, like down to the fucking street signs and down to the alleyways.
01:34:39.000I mean, it's like the potential of the human mind.
01:34:42.000You know, do you think it's because there's obviously some sort of a disconnect socially with people that have autism.
01:34:49.000Do you think it's sort of like one of those things where people who can't see can hear incredibly?
01:34:53.000You know, it's like when you are missing one sense, your other sense is like supercharged.
01:34:59.000Yeah, I just, I don't know, because sometimes I think things like that, or I think, what if he knows exactly everything that's going on, but his mouth doesn't work?
01:35:07.000Kind of like when you're so fucked up and you're trying to say something, you're just like, blah, blah, you can't give your, you know, what you're thinking out in language.
01:36:31.000I wonder if it's possible that, people say that it's due to environmental conditions, it could be due to pollution, it could be due to diet, it could be due to the hormones in our food.
01:36:44.000Like theories on what causes autism, but if it's happening in much greater numbers than it ever has before, and that's debatable as well because some people say it's not.
01:36:53.000There's just more people are diagnosed as being autistic now because they've changed the diagnosis, but that's under debate as well.
01:37:00.000But what if it's sort of a next stage of evolution?
01:37:03.000What if emotions and dealing with the way human beings have always been really emotional?
01:37:11.000What if that's not going to be necessary in the future?
01:37:14.000What if that's slowly being phased out?
01:37:16.000Because human beings don't have to use our fight or flight I think?
01:37:36.000And one of the reasons why I thought this is because of Amish people.
01:37:41.000And Amish people live their life in a very traditional, old-school sort of a way.
01:37:47.000It's kind of a fucked-up, wacky religion, but they drive around in horse-driven buggies, and they build their own houses, and I don't know if they even use electricity.
01:38:20.000It might be just something like cell phones and the signals of cell phones and beepers and all the shit that started that's making it increase.
01:38:38.000You know, there's a lot of theories about, you know, people say that there's a lot of anecdotal evidence about vaccinations.
01:38:46.000And there's a lot of people say there's no scientific connection whatsoever and people always want to jump on that.
01:38:50.000You know, you wear tinfoil hat with this whole thing about autism.
01:38:53.000What people don't realize is thousands of people have been paid off by the Autism Court of America because of, I don't remember the exact title of the court, but I believe it is Autism Court.
01:39:06.000Let me find the exact number and the exact theory because one of the Kennedys, I think Robert Kennedy Jr., is heavily involved in this shit.
01:39:18.000And a lot of people have been paid off by vaccine court because, and it's in the thousands of families, because of their children suffering from brain damage after being vaccinated, that they had brain swelling and brain damage.
01:39:31.000And they received sizable rewards from the courts.
01:39:34.000Now, if that's really true, how do we not know that, you know, you're not damaging other shit with vaccinations, especially like heavy duty vaccinations with Thumerisol and all that stuff that's been linked.
01:39:46.000I mean, the stuff that they removed from vaccines.
01:39:49.000It's a real heavy debated issue because people don't want to think, A, people who have had their children vaccinated, they don't want to think that they've done anything wrong to their children.
01:39:58.000And people who have children that are autistic, they want to blame someone.
01:40:01.000And so they try to blame the vaccination.
01:40:02.000But the bottom line is you're injecting chemicals into your baby when you're not even supposed to give kids fucking peanut butter.
01:40:09.000You're not even supposed to give babies peanut butter because they might have a peanut allergy.
01:40:13.000But yet you can shoot them up with all these fucking chemicals.
01:40:15.000I don't know this whole Jenny McCarthy debate and she's running around saying that vaccinations cause autism to the kids.
01:40:24.000But I have friends that say their kids were normal.
01:40:26.000We have a friend that we know that say his kid got the measles, mumps, and rebellion and then instantly was different.
01:40:36.000Got fucking weird and the kid has some serious autism now.
01:40:40.000Whether or not it's connected or whether or not he had a pre-existing condition that was exacerbated by those vaccinations, that's possible as well.
01:40:48.000But who the fuck knows what's causing all this shit?
01:40:51.000It could be, you know, just the amount of pollution, the higher levels of carbon dioxide in the air.
01:40:56.000It could be, you know, the preservatives in food.
01:40:59.000It could be, you know, it could be a bunch of shit.
01:41:01.000But it also could be the civilization.
01:41:03.000It could be the fact that as civilization progresses, the need to have all these emotions and the need to exist the way people have always existed is morphing.
01:42:05.000When we think about alien life, super advanced alien life, the guy from The Day the Earth Stood Still, he's always super stoic and unemotional.
01:42:14.000I mean, we kind of inherently know that that is the future, that that's where we're headed.
01:42:36.000Look, the only way you know what's causing it is you take the exact same biological human being, you do a bunch of shit to him, he has autism...
01:43:09.000Oh, retard fart porn would be awesome.
01:43:12.000No, it's weird cuz like retard porn like you feel like you're watching something illegal But then you're like wait, this is an adult but then you're like wait He doesn't really know he's getting fucked with that dildo and his asshole.
01:43:22.000No dude I saw Some the other day some hardcore retard porn where this girl who was also retarded was shoving a dildo up this retarded guy's asshole and the girl seemed like more retarded but the guy is I don't know.
01:43:46.000We talked about porn, like who buys porn today.
01:43:49.000The problem is like fucking nobody's buying porn.
01:43:52.000So to make money in porn, they got to go deep.
01:43:54.000Well, you know, porn always has these walls that they hit and they always come out of it because the bottom line is there's always going to be porn, you know?
01:44:01.000Yeah, but how do you make money though when there's so much of it already on the internet?
01:44:05.000You know, it's really amazing how movies and stuff like that are having a hard time getting their videos off the internet.
01:44:12.000But if you want to find a certain movie in porn, a lot of these websites all work together.
01:44:20.000These YouPorns and stuff like that, they'll give you a 30 minute, 30 second clip or something like that, but they're keeping the majority of their main movies off all these websites, which I find real amazing.
01:46:27.000Any fucked up news, anything that's going on, anything that's crazy, any new video that came out, anything bananas is on forums.joerogan.net, the Rogan board.
01:46:38.000If you get on the board and you sign up and you can be a member, anybody can be a member, but if you're a dickhead, if you act like a retard, we pink you.
01:46:45.000And what pink you is, is there's two forums.
01:46:47.000There's one forum that's the regular forum, it's called Shit Talking 101. And there's another forum that's called Special Ed.
01:46:53.000And what Special Ed is, is when you are too fucked up, you need too much attention, you cause too much trouble, you start fucking, you know, just harassing people and being annoying, starting dumb arguments, saying stupid shit.
01:47:07.000I've noticed, especially with Twitter, there's a lot more creepy stalkers than I thought there was.
01:47:10.000There's just a bunch of people out there that are fucking nuts and that you wouldn't ordinarily let them into your life and now because of the internet, you know, they get into your life and you gotta figure out a way to filter them.
01:47:19.000You know, I mean, look, sometimes we have this chat here and I look at the chat and sometimes people are just constantly saying dumb, annoying, stupid shit over and over and over and over and over again.
01:47:32.000But the beautiful thing is you just click on them and ban them.
01:47:34.000You know, and that's the beautiful thing about Twitter too.
01:47:36.000Like some people Twitter you stupid shit and all they're trying to do is get your attention.
01:48:43.000Goldman Sachs is a gigantic bank that's getting sued now, but the federal government is actually looking into them and they're going to bring them to court and they're going to try them and figure out how the fuck they defrauded people.
01:48:55.000What they did was they sold people a bunch of, they told people to buy things and then they banked against it.
01:49:02.000So they told people that what shorting means is, like say, if you decide that, you know, you look at the market and you say, okay, this company is going to take a shit.
01:50:26.000What I'm surprised of is that it keeps going.
01:50:28.000We've talked about this before that our system is like, our culture, our system of government is like Windows 98, Windows 95 with like 100 viruses.
01:50:38.000And we're just throwing patches at it, trying to fix things, trying to work around stuff.
01:50:43.000It's like this ancient fucking stupid system that doesn't work and it crashes all the time and it's got all these bugs and it's filled with corruption.
01:50:52.000And yet, still, there's no solutions for it.
01:51:08.000People that talk about how they hate society the way it is right now, you would be so fucking happy.
01:51:14.000If you moved to an island, you had to work for a living to come back here, you'd be so happy to go back to the way life was and just pay 28% tax.
01:51:21.000I remember when I was in high school and I was on vacation in Myrtle Beach, which is the whitest, trashest vacation ever.
01:51:28.000But I remember talking to this guy and all he did every day was open up this little shack that looked like a grass hut and make margaritas for people.
01:52:01.000Yeah, there's an argument for that, man.
01:52:03.000There's definitely an argument for the dude that checks out.
01:52:05.000He becomes like an expatriate, moves to Costa Rica, sits on the fucking beach, and drinks margaritas while the world explodes in the distance.
01:52:12.000Yeah, I mean, there's an argument for that.
01:52:27.000You could have one hospital thing fuck your life up and then now you have to go back to work like 20 years later and you're going to be out of the loop working at fucking grocery stores trying to pay for your wife to buy new diapers for her, you know?
01:52:58.000Yeah, but still, but nowadays, a million dollars, I mean, you go to the doctor and you get fucking chemo, you're paying like $200,000, you know, or something like that, $300,000.
01:53:07.000Definitely make sure you keep up on your health insurance.
01:54:56.000Sometimes things happen in life, you know?
01:54:58.000They were supposed to come out and visit me next month, and he was going to retire the following month, and my stepmom was thinking about retiring the following month.
01:55:06.000And then I broke up with my relationships, so they decided not to come the following day after deciding not to come.
01:55:15.000My stepmom's getting laid off, but because she had over a week of vacation time set aside that she'd never used, they have to force some kind of year pension plan or whatever.
01:55:28.000The bottom line is just because they didn't take that vacation, she gets paid for a year for no reason.
02:00:35.000The audio that's on this week's iTunes will be, as we said, from a big, beefed-up MP3 recorder, and it's supposed to be the best one you can buy.