The Joe Rogan Experience - Joe Rogan Experience #2006

00:00:01.000 Joe Rogan Podcast, check it out!

00:00:04.000 The Joe Rogan Experience.

00:00:06.000 Train by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night, all day.

00:00:13.000 Simpson, what's happening?

00:00:14.000 Hell yeah.

00:00:14.000 What's up, Joe?

00:00:15.000 Glad to be back.

00:00:17.000 Can I plug my dates real quick before I forget?

00:00:19.000 I'm going to be in Denver at Comedy Works on July 13th through the 15th and Levity Live in West Nyack, New York on July 20th through the 22nd.

00:00:32.000 Get those tickets on bryansimpsoncomedy.com.

00:00:34.000 Nice.

00:00:35.000 Listen to the podcast, BS with Brian Simpson.

00:00:37.000 It's pretty good.

00:00:38.000 It's very good.

00:00:39.000 You enjoy doing it?

00:00:41.000 I love it, man.

00:00:42.000 I love it.

00:00:42.000 I feel like you need something outside of comedy.

00:00:45.000 Like when you start doing it for money, you have to do something else so you're not just doing comedy.

00:00:50.000 Yeah, it also helps your brain just because you're talking about stuff and thinking about stuff.

00:00:54.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:00:55.000 Because of subjects.

00:00:56.000 Yeah, and I'm getting better at it, too.

00:00:58.000 Just having to find your own energy every week or whatever.

00:01:02.000 I just like having something to do.

00:01:03.000 Yeah.

00:01:04.000 No, it's great.

00:01:05.000 It's fun.

00:01:06.000 I think the best tool for comics is the one-person podcast, which you do too.

00:01:11.000 It's like where one person gets to rant about things.

00:01:14.000 You have guests on, but sometimes you just rant about things.

00:01:17.000 Right, yeah.

00:01:17.000 I think that is where Burr comes up with a lot of his material.

00:01:21.000 That's where Tim Dillon comes up with a lot of his material.

00:01:23.000 Oh, yeah.

00:01:24.000 It's an extra superpower.

00:01:26.000 A lot of mine from regret.

00:01:27.000 I'll say something...

00:01:28.000 Because what I do is I have my producer find these articles and I never read them.

00:01:33.000 And he gives me the gist of it and I just react.

00:01:36.000 Sometimes I'm like, oh, why did you say that?

00:01:38.000 When I heard about the submarine people, the first thing I said was, what kind of stupid...

00:01:42.000 But I forget, I got empathy for the people still.

00:01:46.000 They're dumb as fuck, but being trapped in a box is one of the worst ways to go.

00:01:52.000 And they haven't found them yet, but they're hearing banging now?

00:01:56.000 Yeah.

00:01:57.000 What does that mean?

00:01:58.000 I mean, they have 30 hours, less than 30 hours now, just before they run out of air.

00:02:05.000 Yeah, I think they're dead.

00:02:07.000 I think they're already gone.

00:02:08.000 Well, if there's banging, if someone's banging.

00:02:11.000 As of Tuesday afternoon, they had 40 to 41 hours.

00:02:14.000 That was 24 hours ago now.

00:02:16.000 Oh, Jesus Christ.

00:02:17.000 As of recording.

00:02:18.000 So they got like 20 hours.

00:02:19.000 Yeah, like everybody that's still alive is really sleepy right now.

00:02:24.000 Jesus Christ.

00:02:25.000 5 or 6 a.m.

00:02:26.000 Thursday, Eastern Standard Time.

00:02:28.000 Oh, my God.

00:02:30.000 Tomorrow morning.

00:02:31.000 Oh, my God.

00:02:34.000 Oh my god.

00:02:35.000 Well, that's if they're all still alive.

00:02:37.000 True.

00:02:38.000 Right?

00:02:38.000 Right.

00:02:38.000 I think somebody on there might have made a heroic sacrifice or something.

00:02:42.000 What does that do for anybody?

00:02:44.000 It leaves the air for one person to breathe.

00:02:46.000 Do you think someone killed someone so they have more air?

00:02:49.000 I think somebody might have killed themselves so everybody else had more air.

00:02:51.000 How are you going to kill yourself in front of everybody on a little tiny submarine small within this room?

00:02:56.000 Just have somebody choke you out.

00:03:00.000 You know how much energy you'd take to choke someone out?

00:03:02.000 You'd rather just sit still.

00:03:04.000 One of them down there with they son.

00:03:06.000 Can you imagine being on there with your child?

00:03:08.000 You're like, baby, look, daddy showed you how to do...

00:03:11.000 I showed you how to do the rear naked.

00:03:13.000 Oh my God.

00:03:14.000 Finish me off.

00:03:15.000 Live for the rest of us.

00:03:16.000 Oh my God.

00:03:19.000 I don't think that anybody's going to do that.

00:03:20.000 I think they're just going to assume they're all going to die together.

00:03:23.000 Yeah?

00:03:23.000 Yeah.

00:03:25.000 If they die together.

00:03:26.000 I mean, I don't know.

00:03:27.000 I have no idea what ability they have to pull that thing up.

00:03:32.000 Yeah.

00:03:32.000 Oh, can you imagine what's on the cell phones?

00:03:36.000 Like these hours now.

00:03:37.000 They still had hope yesterday, probably.

00:03:39.000 Oh, my God.

00:03:40.000 But right now, can you imagine?

00:03:42.000 Oh, my God.

00:03:43.000 Or being the guy that forgot your charger.

00:03:46.000 Well, the crazy thing is Jamie pointed this out yesterday, and there's lawsuits, apparently.

00:03:51.000 Did you point it out?

00:03:53.000 No, you didn't tell me.

00:03:54.000 Someone told me in the green room.

00:03:55.000 I did.

00:03:55.000 It was you?

00:03:56.000 About the window?

00:03:57.000 Yeah.

00:03:58.000 Oh, that was you.

00:03:59.000 Yeah.

00:03:59.000 Oh, my God.

00:04:00.000 Tell people.

00:04:01.000 Yeah.

00:04:02.000 Someone yesterday, I read that there was a lawsuit in 2018. A whistleblower was trying to report that the window, the glass wasn't Wasn't rated for that depth?

00:04:16.000 Yeah.

00:04:16.000 And they fired him, apparently.

00:04:19.000 I'll send it to you, Jamie.

00:04:20.000 Yeah, you sent it to me on Twitter.

00:04:21.000 Oh, you found it?

00:04:22.000 Okay.

00:04:23.000 Oceangate was warned of potential for catastrophic problems with Titanic mission.

00:04:32.000 January 2018, the company's engineering team was about to hand over the craft.

00:04:37.000 Named Titan to the crew would be responsible for ensuring the safety of its future passengers.

00:04:41.000 But the experts inside and outside the company were beginning to sound alarms.

00:04:45.000 Oceaneet's Director of Marine Operations, David Lockridge, started working on a report around the time, according to court documents, ultimately producing a scathing document to which he said the craft needed more testing and stressed the potential dangers of the passengers of the Titan as the submersible reached extreme depths.

00:05:04.000 Two months later, Oceangate faced similar dire calls from more than three dozen people.

00:05:09.000 Industry leaders, deep sea explorers, and oceanographers who warned in a letter to its chief executive, Stockton Rush, that the company's experimental approach and its decision to forego a traditional assessment could lead to potentially catastrophic problems with the Titanic mission.

00:05:25.000 So, apparently they've done this a hundred times?

00:05:29.000 Yeah, that's not enough.

00:05:31.000 Yeah, they've done it a hundred times.

00:05:32.000 Imagine being number 99 and you hear about this.

00:05:36.000 Yeah, you know, and I read too this morning, some reporter was on one, he was on the boat Last year, and it got lost for like five hours, the submersible.

00:05:46.000 And he didn't say anything.

00:05:47.000 Oh my god.

00:05:48.000 Says, Mr. Lockridge reported learning that the viewport that lets the passengers see outside the craft was only certified to work at depths of up to 1,300 meters.

00:05:59.000 That is far less than would be necessary for trips to the Titanic, which is nearly 4,000 meters below the ocean surface.

00:06:18.000 Wow.

00:06:21.000 Wow.

00:06:27.000 That he refused to accept information for the company's engineering team and that the acoustic monitoring of the hull's strength was better than the kind of testing that Mr. Lockridge felt necessary.

00:06:37.000 The company sent in its lawsuit that it appeared Mr. Lockridge was trying to be fired.

00:06:41.000 Mr. Lockridge responded by alleging wrongful termination.

00:06:45.000 Legal battle ended in a settlement later in 2018. So it seems like it was him but two dozen other people?

00:06:53.000 The separate warning received the same year from 38 experts in the submersible craft industry.

00:06:59.000 All of them were members of the Manned Underwater Vehicles Committee of the Marine Technology Society, a 60-year-old industry group that promotes studies and teaches the public about ocean technology.

00:07:08.000 The experts wrote in their letter to Mr. Rush, Look at this shit.

00:07:21.000 The letter said that Oceangate's marketing of the Titan had been at minimum misleading because it claimed that the submersible would meet or exceed the safety standards of a risk assessment company known as DNV, even though the company had no plans to have the crab formally certified by the agency.

00:07:34.000 Oh god, people are gross.

00:07:37.000 Money.

00:07:38.000 It's always money.

00:07:39.000 It's always money.

00:07:42.000 Money and hubris.

00:07:44.000 Man, it's weird because for some people there's no such thing as enough money.

00:07:49.000 Yeah.

00:07:49.000 And I don't understand it.

00:07:51.000 I don't understand it either.

00:07:52.000 If I go the rest of my life making the money I'm making right now, I'd be great.

00:07:55.000 Yeah!

00:07:56.000 I got enough money!

00:07:58.000 I got enough money where I don't make decisions based on that.

00:08:02.000 You know what Brian Callen told me once?

00:08:03.000 It's a great quote.

00:08:04.000 He said...

00:08:05.000 Once you have enough money to go to a restaurant and not worry about what food costs, because everything else is bullshit.

00:08:10.000 Right.

00:08:11.000 Yeah, just about that.

00:08:12.000 You just go to dinner and not think about it.

00:08:13.000 Not worry.

00:08:14.000 What was that old saying?

00:08:15.000 It was like $70,000.

00:08:16.000 Once you pass $70,000, more money doesn't make you happy.

00:08:19.000 I mean, that was years ago.

00:08:20.000 It's probably like $85,000 now.

00:08:21.000 Right.

00:08:21.000 But it was like, once you pass that...

00:08:23.000 Once you're up around there, you can just buy a good meal and not think about it.

00:08:27.000 Yeah.

00:08:27.000 Yeah, it's like...

00:08:28.000 I don't make decisions where that's the number one factor, where it's like, oh, you could make $10,000 and do a good job, or you could make $100,000 and betray your two closest friends.

00:08:42.000 It's like, I think I'll just take the $10,000.

00:08:44.000 I don't need $90,000.

00:08:45.000 You know what I mean?

00:08:46.000 But they don't think about the guilt that would come up with the betrayal.

00:08:50.000 Imagine bringing your son down there.

00:08:53.000 Imagine the arrogance.

00:08:55.000 Well, that guy, I think the guy with his son, is that the same guy that flew in Jeff Bezos' rocket ship?

00:09:02.000 This dude's a risk taker.

00:09:03.000 I think that's the guy that owns the whole...

00:09:04.000 Oh, God.

00:09:05.000 I think he owns the ship, not the submersible company.

00:09:10.000 Dude, that is so terrifying.

00:09:12.000 But didn't James Cameron do that?

00:09:15.000 James Cameron went down there before he filmed Titanic.

00:09:19.000 I think he went solo.

00:09:21.000 But he was in control of the craft.

00:09:24.000 I don't think somebody was in control of it from somewhere else.

00:09:26.000 See if you have footage of that.

00:09:27.000 James Cameron's a wild motherfucker.

00:09:30.000 He's a wild dude.

00:09:32.000 I mean, just to be him and decide to do that because you're filming the Titanic.

00:09:37.000 I think he was filming Avatar, right?

00:09:40.000 He was filming a documentary.

00:09:42.000 On the Titanic.

00:09:43.000 Yeah, on what it's like to even do it.

00:09:47.000 Deep Sea Challenge is what it's called.

00:09:49.000 3D trailer.

00:09:50.000 Yeah, this is wild.

00:09:51.000 I think they went to the bottom of the ocean.

00:09:54.000 How far is that?

00:09:55.000 There's another video I was pulling up.

00:09:58.000 Have you seen that, like, it's an animation of how deep the ocean gets?

00:10:03.000 Yeah.

00:10:03.000 And it just shows you how, compared to a bunch of stuff on land, and then how far the minimum depths are, and then the maximum depths.

00:10:09.000 So he went to the maximum, like Mariana Tretch.

00:10:12.000 It's more than twice as far down as the Titanic is.

00:10:15.000 Oh my god.

00:10:17.000 And now don't they think there's a deeper spot in there?

00:10:19.000 Yeah, I think they found some other spots they think are deeper.

00:10:21.000 Challenger Deep?

00:10:23.000 What am I thinking about that?

00:10:24.000 They might have done this live, I think, too.

00:10:26.000 Oh my god.

00:10:27.000 Challenger Deep is an area in the Mariana Trench.

00:10:30.000 Just imagine just relying on all that equipment to continue to work properly.

00:10:35.000 But it also looks like they maybe not, whereas this current submarine didn't have any sort of tethering to it.

00:10:42.000 His did?

00:10:43.000 He might have, but I don't know, actually.

00:10:46.000 You know what's wild to me, though?

00:10:50.000 Maybe not.

00:10:50.000 You know how one of the conspiracies about the moon landing is that they really got Stanley Kubrick to film it?

00:10:57.000 We have a fucking director here claiming that he went to the bottom of the ocean, and no one suspects that he made it all up.

00:11:05.000 Yeah, right?

00:11:06.000 Yeah, how we know he fucking really went down there?

00:11:08.000 Right.

00:11:09.000 Yeah.

00:11:10.000 No kidding.

00:11:11.000 How many people were there?

00:11:12.000 Right.

00:11:13.000 Who's the witnesses?

00:11:13.000 All we got is footage of him inside that thing.

00:11:16.000 Yeah, and that's from the 90s.

00:11:17.000 It was probably cheaper to fake it.

00:11:19.000 No, that's new.

00:11:20.000 That's pretty new.

00:11:21.000 I think it's like 2010 or 11. Yeah, it's less than 10 years old.

00:11:23.000 Oh, so he didn't do that for the Titanic?

00:11:25.000 No.

00:11:25.000 No, I think he did it for Avatar.

00:11:28.000 Because, you know, Avatar 2, a lot of it is water.

00:11:31.000 Yeah.

00:11:31.000 Apparently it's like one of the most expensive movies to film ever.

00:11:34.000 It was a great movie.

00:11:34.000 Fuck yeah, it was great.

00:11:35.000 The next three got pushed back.

00:11:37.000 The last one's coming out now in 2031. Jesus Christ.

00:11:41.000 And the main girl's like, I'll be like 50. I shot this, the first one, and I was 20-something.

00:11:47.000 Yeah, but all you're doing is making faces.

00:11:48.000 Yeah.

00:11:49.000 Yeah, you'll be alright.

00:11:52.000 But if you get in a role like that, where you have to come back again and again and again, it's a little bit of a velvet prison for a lot of those guys.

00:12:00.000 Yeah.

00:12:01.000 And I imagine they want to do other stuff.

00:12:03.000 Yeah.

00:12:04.000 But it's also, you want that security.

00:12:06.000 Well, I think that's why they...

00:12:07.000 Is that why they killed off...

00:12:09.000 Batman?

00:12:09.000 I mean, Iron Man?

00:12:11.000 In the Avengers?

00:12:12.000 Was Robert Downey Jr. like, enough already?

00:12:14.000 No.

00:12:16.000 They have a giant, giant, giant story plan that's going on that's way bigger.

00:12:20.000 They're on Phase 5 now or something wild with that?

00:12:23.000 They're allowed to do weird shit now because of the multiverse.

00:12:27.000 They can just go back in time and reset things.

00:12:29.000 That happened in DC, brought in the multiverse too.

00:12:31.000 They've earned so much leeway from the fans.

00:12:36.000 Yeah.

00:12:37.000 A Marvel movie just has to be better than okay.

00:12:40.000 And people are like...

00:12:41.000 Right.

00:12:42.000 Yeah.

00:12:43.000 Because we know at the end what's going to happen.

00:12:46.000 Because the people in the comics, they go way harder than they do.

00:12:51.000 Oh, yeah.

00:12:51.000 Like if HBO had bought the rights to Marvel...

00:12:54.000 It would be some dark shit.

00:12:56.000 Yeah.

00:12:57.000 In the comics...

00:12:58.000 Did you watch any of the movies?

00:13:00.000 The Marvel movies?

00:13:00.000 Yeah, I've watched a few of them.

00:13:02.000 Most of them.

00:13:03.000 In the movies, Thanos' motivation is he wants balance in the universe.

00:13:08.000 So he wants to find the Infinity Zone so he can snap away half the people so there's more resources for the people left.

00:13:13.000 Right.

00:13:13.000 That's a stupid fucking reason.

00:13:15.000 In the comics...

00:13:17.000 What happened is from a little kid, Thanos was a freak, like a mutant.

00:13:22.000 He looked like that.

00:13:22.000 And people treated him like shit.

00:13:23.000 And his only friend was Mistress Death.

00:13:25.000 She would visit him.

00:13:26.000 Death was her realm.

00:13:28.000 She was in charge of all dead shit.

00:13:31.000 And something happened and she fucking hates him.

00:13:33.000 He's banned from her realm.

00:13:37.000 Right?

00:13:37.000 He's in love with her.

00:13:38.000 He's banned from her.

00:13:39.000 That's why he can't die.

00:13:41.000 Oh my god.

00:13:41.000 And he's trying to impress her by sending her more souls.

00:13:45.000 So he wants the gauntlet so he can snap her.

00:13:47.000 Snap it away.

00:13:48.000 So the movie would have ended in a completely different way.

00:13:51.000 He ended up having, like, he created a platform for her in a throne so she could watch when he snapped away the rest of the universe.

00:13:59.000 And all of the fucking Avengers and everybody showed up to fight this motherfucker.

00:14:03.000 It was a Epic battle and when it happened to his daughter, you know the robot chick that betrayed him?

00:14:09.000 Yeah.

00:14:09.000 Her punishment was like she was just stuck standing still.

00:14:12.000 I forget it.

00:14:13.000 He did something horrible to her.

00:14:14.000 But she was just stuck like a slave standing still.

00:14:16.000 And every superhero in the universe is fighting just Thanos.

00:14:20.000 Trying to get that gauntlet off before he snaps, you know?

00:14:24.000 And the robot bitch who he...

00:14:29.000 The last person he saw coming, she used her last bit of willpower and snapped out of it for a second and snatched the glove off.

00:14:36.000 The comic books went hard, man.

00:14:39.000 I wonder why they took that plot line away, because that's a great plot line.

00:14:42.000 He's in love with death.

00:14:43.000 Bro, there's this dude on YouTube called Comics Explained.

00:14:48.000 He's the biggest...

00:14:50.000 I didn't read any of that.

00:14:52.000 He does these videos where he just walks you through the whole story.

00:14:55.000 Ah.

00:14:56.000 You know, some of them, four, five, six hours long, he goes through the whole issues and tells you the whole shit so you don't have to...

00:15:01.000 And I was like, I watch this motherfucker all the time.

00:15:03.000 He walked me through that whole shit.

00:15:04.000 I was like, oh, this was way better than the movies.

00:15:06.000 Oh, that's interesting.

00:15:07.000 Yeah, but I think it would have just taken them longer.

00:15:10.000 Because they have to make the movies for people that don't read the comics.

00:15:14.000 Right.

00:15:14.000 So they can't always do everything that's in there.

00:15:18.000 That sounds better, though.

00:15:19.000 It's way better, dude.

00:15:22.000 We're halfway through four now, I think, on here.

00:15:25.000 Of everything they've made.

00:15:26.000 And then they have all the stuff that's coming out?

00:15:28.000 There's a bunch of stuff on the way, too.

00:15:30.000 Yeah, there's two new Giant Avengers War movies coming.

00:15:32.000 No, we're in Phase 5 now.

00:15:34.000 Yeah, yeah, we're here.

00:15:36.000 Isn't that crazy, though?

00:15:37.000 Oh, Blade?

00:15:39.000 There's a Blade coming out later this year.

00:15:42.000 Daredevil.

00:15:42.000 I've seen X-Men.

00:15:43.000 Yeah, there's X-Men supposedly supposed to be coming out.

00:15:46.000 At some point, they're bringing them back into the fold.

00:15:48.000 Wow.

00:15:48.000 Oh, Captain America, New World Order?

00:15:49.000 They just got the rights to Hulk back, so I'm expecting another Hulk movie to get announced.

00:15:53.000 But Mark Ruffalo's not going to be the Hulk again, right?

00:15:55.000 I don't know.

00:15:56.000 I think there's going to be a new Hulk.

00:15:57.000 Depends if they...

00:15:59.000 I think Mark Ruffalo's busy being a political activist or something.

00:16:02.000 I could take the rights to his face and put somebody else in there.

00:16:05.000 Oh, God.

00:16:06.000 We deepfaked Hulk.

00:16:07.000 He's out there like, Hulk, recycle.

00:16:09.000 Yeah.

00:16:12.000 They can kind of do anything with CGI now.

00:16:14.000 Bruce Willis gave up all the rights.

00:16:16.000 He sold all the rights to his voice because, you know, he has, I think it's called aphasia.

00:16:20.000 He's got a serious neurological condition.

00:16:23.000 Something's really wrong with him.

00:16:25.000 And so he gave up the rights to AI using deepfakes of him for ads and for a bunch of other things.

00:16:31.000 He sold that.

00:16:32.000 Wow.

00:16:33.000 For how much?

00:16:33.000 I don't know.

00:16:34.000 It's a good question.

00:16:35.000 I mean, that's worth it if you can't talk no more.

00:16:36.000 Well, if you know that it's over and you're never going to work again, you're just trying to stay alive.

00:16:42.000 I mean, he's just trying to stay alive.

00:16:45.000 It's bad.

00:16:46.000 There was a video of him with his family.

00:16:49.000 I think they were celebrating a birthday, and you could see him struggling.

00:16:55.000 It's so sad.

00:16:56.000 Just for clarity, I just looked up an article.

00:16:58.000 There's a report that he actually did not sell his rights.

00:17:02.000 Oh.

00:17:03.000 But it's very confusing.

00:17:06.000 It says, actor denies selling rights to AI company for digital twin.

00:17:10.000 But there was also articles that said he did it.

00:17:12.000 Right, 100%.

00:17:13.000 I'm looking up.

00:17:14.000 It says that he did it, but there's one that's counter to that that says he did not.

00:17:17.000 And then the quote is something like, the wording about rights is wrong.

00:17:21.000 Bruce couldn't sell anyone rights.

00:17:23.000 They are his by default.

00:17:25.000 Anyone with any rights, they're his by default.

00:17:28.000 The deepfake companies use artificial intelligence to create realistic simulations of famous figures.

00:17:32.000 A deepfake of Willis appeared in an advert for a Russian telecoms company last year.

00:17:37.000 In August 2021, Megafon launched an ad campaign with Bruce Willis and requested us to create a digital twin of the star.

00:17:44.000 Upon the request, our engineers processed a dataset composed of 34,000 images of Bruce Willis and made his digital twin for this series of Megafon ads.

00:17:53.000 Oh, interesting.

00:17:55.000 James Earl Jones did something similar.

00:17:59.000 Well, I mean, it makes sense.

00:18:04.000 Especially if you're an old dude and you're done.

00:18:06.000 You don't want to act anymore.

00:18:07.000 Just sell your rights.

00:18:08.000 I mean, James Earl Jones is going to be making that Star Wars money until he dies.

00:18:10.000 Right, yeah.

00:18:11.000 And way after.

00:18:12.000 If they can just keep using his voice.

00:18:13.000 Just for his voice.

00:18:14.000 Isn't that wild?

00:18:15.000 Man, I'm trying to get that bad.

00:18:22.000 Yeah, the money you make when you don't have to do anything is, you know, that's freedom right there.

00:18:28.000 Yes.

00:18:28.000 Yeah!

00:18:29.000 Yeah, just passive income just keeps floating in for you.

00:18:33.000 I was just talking to somebody else about this.

00:18:36.000 I think there's people that dream of being rich.

00:18:40.000 But what they really want, the fantasy is really that they can do whatever they want.

00:18:44.000 Yeah.

00:18:44.000 Right?

00:18:45.000 They really dream of freedom.

00:18:46.000 Yeah.

00:18:47.000 But because we're in a capitalist society, freedom is being rich.

00:18:51.000 They dream of stuff, too, though.

00:18:53.000 They dream of stuff.

00:18:54.000 Oh, what do you mean?

00:18:55.000 Stuff.

00:18:56.000 Like, if you don't have stuff, you want stuff.

00:18:57.000 Oh, right.

00:18:58.000 Well, that's what I mean.

00:18:58.000 Being able to buy what you want to buy, being able to do what you want to do.

00:19:01.000 But then there's, like, the Bezos's of the world, where it's like, for them, it's about dominating.

00:19:06.000 It's not about the amount of money.

00:19:08.000 But he seems to have, like, he resigned from the company, right?

00:19:11.000 He's not the CEO anymore.

00:19:13.000 Yeah.

00:19:13.000 And I think he's just balling.

00:19:16.000 That's what I think he's doing.

00:19:18.000 He's just banging that super hot girlfriend of his and traveling around the world in the biggest yacht that no one's ever built.

00:19:23.000 He's doing all that anti-aging shit.

00:19:25.000 Yeah, he's doing ham.

00:19:26.000 Who's that one billionaire that I was telling you about?

00:19:28.000 He takes blood transfusions from his son.

00:19:30.000 That guy's weird.

00:19:32.000 Man, but he does look younger.

00:19:33.000 He looks great.

00:19:35.000 But, I mean, you probably could look that...

00:19:37.000 There's guys that look that good that are his age that just work out all the time.

00:19:40.000 But that's why I don't know...

00:19:42.000 Because he's doing so many things that I don't know what is he going overboard with.

00:19:47.000 Like, he takes, like, 40 vitamins in the morning and 40 more in the afternoon.

00:19:52.000 He always...

00:19:53.000 He always sleeps at the same exact time no matter what?

00:19:56.000 That seems tedious.

00:19:58.000 I know.

00:19:58.000 It's like, I'd rather just die sooner.

00:20:00.000 You know, like I was telling you, I had a headache last night because of all the shit that's going on in the club.

00:20:04.000 Nonsense.

00:20:05.000 There's nothing bad.

00:20:07.000 So then I had a hard time going to sleep.

00:20:10.000 And then I got up in the morning and I was foggy as shit.

00:20:13.000 Got in the cold plunge.

00:20:14.000 Like, I know I'm not at optimum today.

00:20:17.000 Yeah.

00:20:17.000 I know it.

00:20:18.000 But, you know, that's life.

00:20:20.000 That's life.

00:20:20.000 That is life.

00:20:21.000 Suck it up, bitch.

00:20:23.000 Like, is that him and his son?

00:20:25.000 So he looks to me like a normal, fit 40-year-old guy.

00:20:29.000 Nah, but show a picture of him from, like, five years ago.

00:20:32.000 What, did he look bad?

00:20:33.000 He just didn't.

00:20:34.000 He looks better?

00:20:34.000 He looks worse, yeah.

00:20:36.000 He looks better now.

00:20:37.000 Well, maybe back then he was working, too.

00:20:39.000 Oh, see, that's him right there.

00:20:40.000 See what the...

00:20:41.000 Is he working still?

00:20:44.000 Go back.

00:20:46.000 Oh, that's him?

00:20:47.000 Right, that's him right there.

00:20:49.000 Oh.

00:20:49.000 Well, also, it looks like he lost weight.

00:20:51.000 He got fitter.

00:20:52.000 Yeah, he went goth.

00:20:53.000 Which makes you healthier.

00:20:54.000 He looks more like a superhero than goth.

00:20:56.000 What is that strap on his shoulder?

00:20:58.000 What is he doing?

00:20:59.000 Is that a bulletproof vest?

00:21:00.000 Is that guy a superhero?

00:21:02.000 What is that outfit?

00:21:03.000 Imagine wearing that outfit.

00:21:04.000 If you showed up at the mothership with that outfit, everybody would be like, Brian Simpson, what the fuck are you smoking?

00:21:10.000 Tony might rock that.

00:21:11.000 Tony would rock that with a big belt buckle.

00:21:15.000 No, but I bet you it's probably something that lets a certain frequency of light to his nipples that helps him retain vitamin D or some shit.

00:21:23.000 Right, right.

00:21:23.000 What is that stupid shirt, man?

00:21:25.000 That shirt's ridiculous.

00:21:26.000 Yeah, he's got them zero shoes on.

00:21:29.000 Yeah.

00:21:30.000 Yeah.

00:21:31.000 Oh, he's doing all the face stuff, too.

00:21:32.000 See, that's another thing that they can do.

00:21:34.000 They do this face thing.

00:21:35.000 Oh, Jesus.

00:21:36.000 What happened to his face?

00:21:37.000 I think he's just got cold.

00:21:39.000 Oh, that's a different guy.

00:21:41.000 He said I tried.

00:21:42.000 Yeah.

00:21:43.000 But what is he doing right there?

00:21:45.000 It says 45-year-old CEO to the right of that.

00:21:47.000 Yeah.

00:21:48.000 So, what is he doing?

00:21:49.000 Okay, so there's...

00:21:51.000 Yeah.

00:21:52.000 There's a thing that they do where they put these micro needles all over your face and then they rub stem cells in your face.

00:21:59.000 I know a few people that have had that done.

00:22:00.000 But now imagine the sun doing this from 18. Yeah.

00:22:05.000 That might be a whole different thing.

00:22:07.000 Yeah, so he eats 2,000 calories a day.

00:22:10.000 But he's vegan.

00:22:11.000 Yeah, that's not good.

00:22:13.000 That's a lot of vegetables.

00:22:14.000 But that's interesting that he would choose that route, the vegan route for longevity.

00:22:19.000 Because there's a lot of nutritional pitfalls in that.

00:22:24.000 Can you not make up for those?

00:22:25.000 You can.

00:22:25.000 Because like you said, he takes like 50, 60 vitamins.

00:22:27.000 Yeah, it's possible.

00:22:28.000 It's possible to do.

00:22:30.000 But the most nutrient-dense foods are red meat.

00:22:33.000 That's the most nutrient-dense foods.

00:22:35.000 There's just a lot of weird propaganda.

00:22:38.000 He might switch it up.

00:22:39.000 Well, who knows?

00:22:40.000 I mean, he doesn't look that good there, though.

00:22:42.000 Show that thing again?

00:22:43.000 But it's like, for a lot of people on vegan diets, it's hard to put mass on.

00:22:49.000 I mean, he looks okay.

00:22:51.000 But he looks like a normal 45-year-old guy that's fit.

00:22:53.000 And I think that's his dad, too.

00:22:55.000 See that picture right there in the middle?

00:22:56.000 Oh.

00:22:57.000 Him, his son, and his dad all did the transfusion thing.

00:23:00.000 I'm not sure I like that picture.

00:23:02.000 Him in the middle.

00:23:03.000 Like, why were you looking at me like that?

00:23:05.000 Imagine if you go over to someone's house and the son and the dad and the little kid, they're all posed like this.

00:23:11.000 Like, come on.

00:23:13.000 What are you doing?

00:23:14.000 If I went over your house and you were there with two other dudes, I'd be like, hey man, I'm gonna leave.

00:23:20.000 We were embracing?

00:23:21.000 Yeah, I mean, I want you guys to be happy.

00:23:22.000 The one on the right's not as bad as the one on the right.

00:23:24.000 No, the one on the right is normal.

00:23:25.000 Joe, this is how we stay younger, Joe.

00:23:27.000 It's cuddle puddles.

00:23:28.000 It looks like his dad's not listening.

00:23:30.000 Intergenerational cuddle puddles.

00:23:32.000 That bell puckle is fucking straining.

00:23:35.000 Yeah, well, he's definitely holding it in his stomach.

00:23:37.000 Yeah, on top of that, that guy's not listening.

00:23:41.000 Isn't it funny?

00:23:42.000 Like, the son is on this crazy health kick.

00:23:45.000 The dad looks like he's eating meatball subs.

00:23:47.000 Oh, yeah.

00:23:47.000 Well, I think he was estranged from the dad and the son until, like, recently.

00:23:51.000 Oh.

00:23:52.000 And they got back together for the transfusion.

00:23:55.000 Oh, man.

00:23:55.000 That is so hard for people.

00:23:57.000 I've met people that, like, their kid won't talk to them.

00:24:00.000 Like, oh, my God.

00:24:01.000 Yeah, that's wild.

00:24:02.000 What happened?

00:24:03.000 And then I meet the opposite.

00:24:04.000 Last night at the club, there were two people where it was just a dad out with his son.

00:24:09.000 Well, one was out with his son and one was out with his daughter.

00:24:11.000 I was like, that's awesome.

00:24:12.000 Beautiful.

00:24:12.000 If you're 50 and your 25-year-old daughter wants to still hang out with you, you did pretty good.

00:24:16.000 Yes.

00:24:17.000 No, it's beautiful.

00:24:18.000 Hanging out with your kids is awesome.

00:24:20.000 I don't understand.

00:24:21.000 I mean, all sorts of circumstances.

00:24:24.000 Divorce.

00:24:24.000 Parents turn one kid against the other parent.

00:24:28.000 That's horrible.

00:24:29.000 I've seen that shit happen.

00:24:31.000 That's like when you date manipulative, vindictive people and they do it to other people and you don't think they're ever going to do it to you.

00:24:37.000 Guess what?

00:24:39.000 You're going to be other people if they don't like you anymore.

00:24:41.000 You know what though?

00:24:43.000 While sleeping, Johnson is hooked up to a machine that counts the number of nighttime erections.

00:24:48.000 Oh, wow.

00:24:50.000 This guy's going too hard with data.

00:24:52.000 He also takes daily measurements of his weight, body mass index, body fat, blood glucose levels, and heart rate variations.

00:24:59.000 I mean, okay.

00:25:01.000 Maybe he has a lucky number.

00:25:02.000 He wakes up, 13!

00:25:03.000 Yes!

00:25:03.000 13 boners.

00:25:04.000 How many boners do you think you get in a night?

00:25:06.000 I don't know.

00:25:07.000 What's a good number?

00:25:07.000 I didn't know you got them at night.

00:25:09.000 I get them.

00:25:09.000 Every now and then I go to pee and I gotta do the lean.

00:25:12.000 But why do you need to measure?

00:25:13.000 Is there a normal amount?

00:25:15.000 Right.

00:25:17.000 Yeah.

00:25:17.000 I don't want to know that much data.

00:25:19.000 I don't want to be worried about stuff like that.

00:25:20.000 There's so much data.

00:25:22.000 That ain't going to come out with like an apple cock ring that'll measure for you.

00:25:26.000 Five.

00:25:27.000 Five nocturnal erections during an eight-hour sleep cycle, typically, with each erection lasting about 25 minutes.

00:25:33.000 That's about one erection every 90 minutes.

00:25:36.000 Oh, man.

00:25:36.000 Interesting.

00:25:37.000 But that's weird.

00:25:38.000 Like, why is he measuring?

00:25:40.000 I guess just find out what his testosterone levels are, but wouldn't you be able to do that with blood levels?

00:25:44.000 I don't know.

00:25:45.000 Yeah, man, you can go crazy.

00:25:47.000 Like, when I had that whoop thing, like, if I looked at it, I mean, I still have it, I just haven't been wearing it, but if you look at it and it says you only got, like, 25% recovery, but you feel good, you're like, what the fuck is going on?

00:25:59.000 How come I feel good?

00:26:00.000 You know?

00:26:01.000 But that was actually a sign that a lot of people had COVID. Because they would have an eight-hour sleep and they'd wake up and it'd be like 4% recovery.

00:26:07.000 Like, what the fuck is going on?

00:26:08.000 Like the way you were breathing?

00:26:09.000 It's your body struggling.

00:26:10.000 Your body's not doing so good, you know?

00:26:13.000 Yeah, I don't know.

00:26:14.000 Sometimes I still do the health tracking, but sometimes I want to.

00:26:17.000 I just listen to my body for the most part.

00:26:20.000 I mean, I do measure my heart rate and I do wear a heart rate strap when I do some of my workouts, but...

00:26:26.000 Like yesterday, there's a couple people in my family that are sick right now.

00:26:29.000 Not bad, but enough, you know, that it's like, they're sick.

00:26:33.000 And I was working out yesterday, I was like, boy, do I feel like a bitch.

00:26:37.000 Like, I just wanted to stop.

00:26:39.000 But I felt strong enough to do it.

00:26:42.000 So I'm riding this line where I don't want to overstress myself and tax my immune system, but I don't want to pussy out of my workout.

00:26:50.000 So I've got to feel it along the way while I'm doing it.

00:26:53.000 It's like I'm going through a dark room and I'm just feeling the walls by hand.

00:26:59.000 You got more discipline than me.

00:27:00.000 I would just give in.

00:27:02.000 Well, I have a particular type of mental illness.

00:27:05.000 I need to do physical things.

00:27:08.000 If I don't, my brain doesn't work that good.

00:27:11.000 It's too confused.

00:27:12.000 It's riddled with extra energy and data that it doesn't need.

00:27:17.000 It concentrates on stupid shit.

00:27:19.000 It's not good for me.

00:27:21.000 For me, I need exertion.

00:27:22.000 But when I have exertion, I'm calm and friendly and nice and easy going and I'm compassionate and I think about other people like their problems before I react to things.

00:27:33.000 But when I'm like amped up, like if I haven't worked out for three days, like I'm not good at decisions, you know, because then I'm you know, you want to say things like shut the fuck up.

00:27:42.000 But when you say shut the fuck up, nobody hears shut the fuck up.

00:27:44.000 They get mad at you.

00:27:46.000 They don't think, oh, I should shut the fuck up.

00:27:48.000 It's the most ineffective thing to say.

00:27:50.000 Unless you're really thinking about violence and you're letting someone know, if you don't shut the fuck up, I'm going to put you in the hospital.

00:27:57.000 Unless it's that.

00:27:59.000 Yeah.

00:28:00.000 It's a warning?

00:28:01.000 We were talking about respect the other day.

00:28:02.000 That shit'll save your life in a whole bunch of situations.

00:28:05.000 Fuck yeah, respect people.

00:28:07.000 If all else fails, just be respectful.

00:28:09.000 Always.

00:28:09.000 Always be respectful.

00:28:11.000 It's wild now because nowadays it's like...

00:28:13.000 It just seems like a lot of people are comfortable being disrespectful.

00:28:16.000 It's internet.

00:28:17.000 Yeah, it's kind of crazy, man.

00:28:20.000 Yeah.

00:28:20.000 What's that internet culture?

00:28:22.000 That way of communicating becomes a part of your system.

00:28:26.000 You're used to communicating like that.

00:28:28.000 There's so many people that are so crazy on Twitter.

00:28:30.000 The way they talk to people.

00:28:31.000 I couldn't imagine talking to someone like that to their face just because it's so mean.

00:28:36.000 It's so shitty.

00:28:37.000 It's fighting words to some people.

00:28:38.000 It's also such a pussy move because you know the person's not there.

00:28:42.000 You're saying mean shit to them to hurt their feelings knowing that they're not there and then you keep checking for replies like a sick fuck.

00:28:50.000 Because on top of it, it's like everyone sees this.

00:28:54.000 It's more important for me to get in a good clapback than it is...

00:28:59.000 Right?

00:29:00.000 I had an old gym, one of my gym teachers used to like, whenever it got like physical in physical education class, like somebody wanted to fight or whatever, he would let us fight, but he would take you in the closet where we put the mats, and he'd be like, well y'all can fight in here in front of me,

00:29:16.000 but you just can't fight in front of everyone.

00:29:18.000 And 90% of the time people go in that closet and make up.

00:29:21.000 Yeah, because it's like, it's the The wanting to save face that makes you not be able to let shit go.

00:29:27.000 It's also, when you get in that closet, you realize it's real.

00:29:30.000 You start looking for a way out of this.

00:29:32.000 And I don't get anything out of it.

00:29:33.000 No one sees it.

00:29:34.000 So now, how do I benefit from beating you up?

00:29:36.000 We gonna both just leave here and tell people what happened?

00:29:38.000 Right.

00:29:39.000 No one's gonna see it.

00:29:40.000 And, you know, it's also, you're about to get your face punched in.

00:29:44.000 Yeah, but that shit will backfire, though, too.

00:29:46.000 Always.

00:29:46.000 Because some people really want to scrap, but you take them in there and it's a problem.

00:29:49.000 Yeah, they're looking forward to it.

00:29:51.000 I had Mike Perry on the podcast the other day.

00:29:53.000 He's a bare-knuckle boxing guy that came over from the UFC. That dude, like, some people pretend to not give a fuck.

00:30:00.000 That dude doesn't give a fuck.

00:30:02.000 He doesn't give a fuck.

00:30:03.000 Better him than me.

00:30:05.000 Thank God there's people like that.

00:30:06.000 Yeah, there's people like that out there and they're so fucking entertaining to watch them fight.

00:30:11.000 Yeah.

00:30:11.000 And you know what?

00:30:12.000 As much as I made fun of it when it first came out, the slap league.

00:30:16.000 You like it?

00:30:17.000 I like the highlights.

00:30:18.000 I haven't watched a full match, but some of the people in there are characters, man.

00:30:23.000 Yeah, for sure.

00:30:24.000 If you're gonna get slapped in the face for a living, it'd probably be a character.

00:30:30.000 It's designed for those clips.

00:30:32.000 It's perfect.

00:30:33.000 I think Dana needs to spring off.

00:30:35.000 They need to have a separate champ for front hand and back hand slaps.

00:30:40.000 Ooh, back hand slap.

00:30:41.000 Yeah, they need a back hand slap champion.

00:30:44.000 If you backhand slap, you gotta be dressed like a pimp.

00:30:47.000 You gotta have some fly velvet suit on, something just beautiful and purple.

00:30:53.000 Instead of a belt, it's just a cape for the champ?

00:30:55.000 Yeah, a cape.

00:30:56.000 And a crown, maybe, too.

00:30:59.000 Big ol' pimp crown.

00:31:01.000 And a chalice.

00:31:02.000 Big time.

00:31:02.000 Remember Pimp's Up, Hose Down?

00:31:04.000 Oh yeah.

00:31:05.000 There was a while where like...

00:31:07.000 They won't air shit like that.

00:31:07.000 They would never air shit like that today.

00:31:09.000 It's horrible exploitation.

00:31:11.000 And they were like celebrating these guys.

00:31:12.000 Yeah.

00:31:13.000 HBO, listen, we gotta give HBO their flowers.

00:31:16.000 Yes.

00:31:16.000 They've made some of the most sensational TV since...

00:31:20.000 I mean, from the time I was a kid.

00:31:21.000 Fuck yeah.

00:31:22.000 Up to now.

00:31:23.000 They got some...

00:31:24.000 They got more...

00:31:25.000 They probably got...

00:31:25.000 Their batting average is higher than...

00:31:27.000 Every other network, for sure.

00:31:28.000 The Bad and Average is sensational.

00:31:30.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:31:31.000 So many good shows.

00:31:32.000 There's more good shows than bad shows on HBO. Just Succession, which just ended.

00:31:36.000 Yeah, Succession was great.

00:31:38.000 Fucking great show.

00:31:39.000 Yeah.

00:31:40.000 Fucking great show.

00:31:42.000 And the ending, holy shit.

00:31:44.000 Man, you know what?

00:31:44.000 I clapped in my house.

00:31:45.000 I was like, thank you.

00:31:46.000 I feel different about the ending every time I think about it.

00:31:49.000 Well, there's so much there.

00:31:51.000 You're so conflicted because there's no heroes.

00:31:54.000 There's no heroes.

00:31:55.000 They're all fucking losers.

00:31:56.000 And that's real.

00:31:58.000 That's the real corporate world.

00:32:00.000 Think about the fact that at the end of the day, losing was still them all being rich.

00:32:07.000 Billionaires.

00:32:08.000 Like unbelievably wealthy.

00:32:09.000 Unbelievably wealthy.

00:32:10.000 And they were so—because like I told you, people like that, it's not about the amount of money.

00:32:15.000 They wanted to be CEO. They all did.

00:32:17.000 And none of them ended up being...

00:32:19.000 You know the whole Art of War thing where it's like, never go beyond victory.

00:32:28.000 So when I first watched it, I was like, man, fuck Shiv.

00:32:30.000 She'd rather be under Tom, who betrayed her, than her brother be in charge.

00:32:35.000 But then I thought about it.

00:32:37.000 At the end, it was like, the brother fucked up.

00:32:40.000 And I don't know if this was intentional, but I like to think it is.

00:32:44.000 You never go beyond winning.

00:32:47.000 He had it won.

00:32:48.000 He had it sold up.

00:32:49.000 And you stop.

00:32:50.000 You don't do too much.

00:32:52.000 And when he was, he wanted to gloat one last time in the room.

00:32:55.000 And remember, he excluded Shiv again.

00:32:58.000 He was like, me and my brother Yeah.

00:33:01.000 Was able to bring it across the line.

00:33:03.000 That was her one thing.

00:33:05.000 Yep.

00:33:05.000 Like, stop excluding me.

00:33:06.000 I'm smarter than both of y'all.

00:33:08.000 Yeah.

00:33:08.000 And one last time, and that's when she got up, I was like, I gotta think about it.

00:33:12.000 Those characters are so perfect.

00:33:15.000 Oh, man.

00:33:15.000 It was a perfect cast, for sure.

00:33:17.000 They're so good.

00:33:18.000 That show was so well casted.

00:33:19.000 So well casted.

00:33:21.000 And what did Cousin Greg end up getting?

00:33:22.000 Oh, he was just Tom's bitch for the rest of his life.

00:33:24.000 Yes.

00:33:25.000 Forever.

00:33:26.000 God, that dude's evil.

00:33:27.000 That dude's evil.

00:33:29.000 Yeah, both of them are.

00:33:30.000 Greg's evil, too.

00:33:31.000 Yeah.

00:33:32.000 He's creepy.

00:33:33.000 Yeah, and he comes off as like this bumbling kid, but he got sucked into it.

00:33:37.000 Manipulative, yeah.

00:33:38.000 Yeah.

00:33:38.000 But he was manipulative from the jump, though.

00:33:40.000 His granddad tried to talk him out of it.

00:33:41.000 He was like, just be rich and away from these guys.

00:33:44.000 Whew.

00:33:45.000 They're not happy.

00:33:46.000 So crazy.

00:33:47.000 None of them are happy.

00:33:48.000 But it's a thing like gambling addicts.

00:33:51.000 I was talking to my friend Sean about gambling addicts the other day.

00:33:54.000 Growing up in pool halls, not growing up, but being in pool halls when I was younger, it was my first exposure to real gambling addicts.

00:34:02.000 And it is a sickness that's different than anything that I ever thought it was.

00:34:07.000 It is just like crack.

00:34:09.000 These guys, they want that fucking, they just gotta be in action.

00:34:13.000 And that's what they call it.

00:34:14.000 They call it action.

00:34:15.000 I gotta be in action.

00:34:16.000 They want to be in action.

00:34:18.000 Money is just gambling coupons.

00:34:20.000 Yeah, they love the risk of it.

00:34:22.000 It's not the winnings or the losings.

00:34:24.000 It's the fucking adrenaline rush and you're watching the game.

00:34:28.000 Did you see Uncut Gems?

00:34:29.000 Oh yeah.

00:34:29.000 Uncut Gems.

00:34:30.000 Once.

00:34:31.000 It's fucking great.

00:34:32.000 I can't watch it again.

00:34:33.000 It's so anxiety.

00:34:35.000 I knew people like that.

00:34:37.000 I knew people like that.

00:34:39.000 I knew people that blew everything.

00:34:41.000 Blew everything.

00:34:42.000 I watched people blow tons of money.

00:34:45.000 I've seen it.

00:34:46.000 In pool halls, man, it's like everyone's a junkie.

00:34:50.000 They're all junkies.

00:34:51.000 You got your players who are like, they're addicted to playing, and they're also addicted to winning, and they're addicted to making scores.

00:35:00.000 But then you got the line people, the people that aren't even, they're not playing.

00:35:04.000 They're fucking betting on the side.

00:35:06.000 Those are the big bets.

00:35:07.000 That's the big money.

00:35:09.000 Sometimes people are playing for $25,000, but there's $500,000 in the room.

00:35:16.000 These are like big money games in the Philippines, big money games when some guy will come over from Europe and match up with somebody.

00:35:24.000 They'll have these three-day tournaments where they're playing for $100,000, but there's so much betting on the side.

00:35:33.000 I wonder if they just sit down and do the math and realize you lose way more than you win.

00:35:38.000 Yeah, but it's the fucking action.

00:35:40.000 You think you win sometimes, you're going to keep winning.

00:35:43.000 You're going to win again.

00:35:43.000 I'm going to get them back.

00:35:45.000 I mean, that was Uncut Gems.

00:35:46.000 It was always like chasing after that money.

00:35:48.000 That's what they all do, man.

00:35:50.000 It's wild to watch because it was so scary to me.

00:35:54.000 I was nervous about gambling on pool.

00:35:56.000 Like, I would only gamble a certain amount.

00:35:58.000 You think it's easy to have a friend with a gambling problem or a drinking problem?

00:36:03.000 Whew.

00:36:05.000 I know a lot of good people that have kicked drinking.

00:36:07.000 I know a lot of really good people that had drinking problems and now they're awesome.

00:36:12.000 Like, look at Dave Attell.

00:36:14.000 He had a drinking problem and he kicked it and became...

00:36:16.000 He was already one of the best comics alive when he was a drinking guy and then quit and got even better!

00:36:24.000 I mean, and he's amazing.

00:36:25.000 He's amazing to be around.

00:36:26.000 He's a beautiful person.

00:36:28.000 Everyone loves David Tell.

00:36:29.000 Yeah, that's true.

00:36:29.000 So it's like, that's a guy that had a drinking problem.

00:36:31.000 I know a bunch of people that have had drinking problems.

00:36:34.000 Drinking problems, to me, it seems like it's more relatable.

00:36:37.000 You want to escape.

00:36:38.000 And it's usually some pain that you're dealing with in your life.

00:36:41.000 Some childhood shit or some failure shit.

00:36:44.000 Something you're avoiding.

00:36:45.000 Yeah, or it's a genetic thing.

00:36:47.000 Some people, they just have a genetic propensity to alcoholism.

00:36:50.000 It just runs through their whole family.

00:36:51.000 Dude, I just heard a friend of mine told me about a guy the other day where he has a drinking problem, but he also is an alcoholic.

00:37:01.000 I'm sorry.

00:37:01.000 He's an alcoholic, but he's also allergic to alcohol.

00:37:04.000 Oh, my God.

00:37:06.000 So he would literally drink himself into the hospital like once a week.

00:37:10.000 Oh, my God.

00:37:11.000 And I was like, right there, that's bad right there.

00:37:14.000 You gotta recognize that shit is like your arch nemesis.

00:37:17.000 But there's a thing about addictions where it's like even if you know it's bad for you, you keep getting pulled into it.

00:37:24.000 It's hard to explain that to somebody that's never been addicted to anything.

00:37:27.000 Or at least they think they haven't.

00:37:28.000 But, you know.

00:37:30.000 Dude, I was getting addicted to those nicotine vapes.

00:37:32.000 But not even physically addictive.

00:37:34.000 This is what's crazy.

00:37:35.000 I could put it away and not use it for a week.

00:37:39.000 Like, I'd go on vacation.

00:37:40.000 I wouldn't bring one with me.

00:37:41.000 But then when I got one back, I just wanted to suck on it.

00:37:45.000 And here's the thing.

00:37:46.000 Somebody's going to turn that into a me.

00:37:47.000 I just wanted to suck on it.

00:37:48.000 Suck it, suck it, suck it.

00:37:49.000 Oh, there's so many horrible things you said.

00:37:51.000 Me and Ari the other day had a conversation about docking.

00:37:54.000 You know when dudes take their foreskin and put it over another dude's dick?

00:37:57.000 Right.

00:37:57.000 And we were like, we were arguing over who's winning.

00:38:00.000 You know?

00:38:02.000 And he's like, I'm sucking your dick.

00:38:05.000 I'm like, no, no, no, I'm fucking your mouth.

00:38:06.000 It was like, this is stupid.

00:38:09.000 Stupid, but I was like, my God.

00:38:10.000 Why do I always get in conversations like that around Ari?

00:38:12.000 Oh, he's a maniac.

00:38:13.000 He's going to be there tonight.

00:38:15.000 Oh, dope, dope.

00:38:15.000 Yeah, I can't wait to see him.

00:38:17.000 Adrian is there tomorrow.

00:38:19.000 Pellucci?

00:38:19.000 Yeah.

00:38:20.000 Oh, okay.

00:38:21.000 Yeah, I love her.

00:38:23.000 Yeah, she's funny as shit.

00:38:23.000 She's funny as shit.

00:38:24.000 She's on the rise.

00:38:26.000 You know, she's like a new kind of interesting talent.

00:38:29.000 Yeah.

00:38:30.000 Fascinating person.

00:38:31.000 Super fucking smart.

00:38:32.000 She go hard, too.

00:38:33.000 She goes hard.

00:38:35.000 Yeah.

00:38:35.000 She goes hard on stage.

00:38:37.000 Yeah, but I've never met her personally.

00:38:39.000 She gonna be there tonight?

00:38:39.000 Yeah, sweetheart.

00:38:41.000 I don't know if she's here tonight.

00:38:42.000 She'll be here tomorrow.

00:38:43.000 She might come in tonight.

00:38:44.000 But yeah, I got to meet her during the Moondower.

00:38:48.000 She came by.

00:38:49.000 The mothership is so dumb.

00:38:50.000 How about Bottom of the Barrel?

00:38:51.000 See, I didn't talk about Bottom of the Barrel at the beginning of the show.

00:38:54.000 Yeah.

00:38:54.000 But it's so much fucking fun.

00:38:57.000 I look forward to it so much.

00:38:59.000 I was bummed out that I didn't get on stage the second one.

00:39:02.000 You never know, man.

00:39:03.000 You never know.

00:39:05.000 I've had two premises that I've gotten out of Bottom of the Barrel that became actual bits.

00:39:09.000 Yeah, every night it's And it's a different show every night.

00:39:12.000 It's so fun.

00:39:13.000 It's so silly.

00:39:14.000 Yeah.

00:39:15.000 And the crowds, now we're starting to get to the point where regular people are coming back and back and back.

00:39:19.000 Yeah, they come back.

00:39:20.000 It's always different.

00:39:21.000 It's always different.

00:39:22.000 It's always different.

00:39:23.000 And some of the suggestions are hilarious.

00:39:25.000 Yeah, I give out prizes if I get a real good one.

00:39:28.000 The fly gun.

00:39:30.000 It's a gun called Bug Assault.

00:39:32.000 They sponsor our show and they give us...

00:39:35.000 And the thing is, this is one of those places where they didn't offer to sponsor.

00:39:38.000 I... I got one, and I was like, everyone should have one of these.

00:39:44.000 Like, I would be their spokesperson if they paid me.

00:39:47.000 Because, I don't know if I've ever told you this, but I have a real, my relationship with flies, When I was deployed, my first deployment to Iraq, it was when we didn't have shit going on.

00:39:59.000 We just came over the border.

00:40:00.000 And we was camping in this town called Anumanaya.

00:40:03.000 And it had the most fertile soil I've ever seen.

00:40:07.000 It just looked nutrient.

00:40:08.000 I could be wrong.

00:40:10.000 But we would dig holes to shit in every day.

00:40:13.000 We didn't have any porta-potties.

00:40:16.000 And whoever got in trouble would have to bury the holes.

00:40:19.000 But anyway...

00:40:20.000 These were the biggest, most numerous flies that I've ever seen in my life.

00:40:26.000 I learned that they hibernate.

00:40:28.000 Did you know that?

00:40:29.000 That's probably not the scientific term.

00:40:31.000 But they sleep at night.

00:40:33.000 To the point where I would wake up, the tarp we had, it would be completely covered in flies.

00:40:38.000 Like millions of flies.

00:40:40.000 And you could scrape them off.

00:40:42.000 They wouldn't move.

00:40:42.000 They wouldn't wake up.

00:40:43.000 You could just...

00:40:43.000 Wow.

00:40:44.000 And we did it every morning.

00:40:45.000 We killed them all.

00:40:46.000 And every morning it was full again.

00:40:48.000 It was that many flies.

00:40:49.000 Imagine if you didn't kill them.

00:40:50.000 Yeah.

00:40:50.000 And there were so many flies and they were starving.

00:40:53.000 Any chance hit moisture.

00:40:55.000 So we would eat these MREs, you know?

00:40:58.000 You haven't had an MRE? So you know how everybody eats it out of the bag it comes in, right?

00:41:03.000 Right.

00:41:03.000 And so when you open that bag, you had about three seconds to get the food in your mouth.

00:41:08.000 Because it's like they would sense the moisture.

00:41:11.000 And even if you got the bad closing time, they would pop, pop, pop.

00:41:13.000 Just anything.

00:41:15.000 If you cried, they were on your tears.

00:41:16.000 They were just starving.

00:41:18.000 That's why I don't eat outside.

00:41:21.000 If it's too many women in the group, they always want to eat outside.

00:41:25.000 I'm good.

00:41:26.000 I'm not going to come because I already know the cutest girl is going to go, we should get outside.

00:41:31.000 And I'm going to be pissed the first time a fly lands on my food.

00:41:35.000 I hate this bitch.

00:41:36.000 You wanted to do this.

00:41:38.000 And so...

00:41:40.000 When I discovered a gun that could kill these motherfuckers.

00:41:43.000 Yeah!

00:41:45.000 Did you know my wife took mine away?

00:41:47.000 Really?

00:41:50.000 She's like, the whole fucking house is going to be covered with salt.

00:41:52.000 You're going to leave the doors open just so you can kill more flies.

00:41:55.000 Did I give you the pistol or the rifle?

00:41:56.000 You gave me a rifle.

00:41:58.000 Oh, Joe.

00:41:58.000 No, no, no.

00:41:59.000 The pistol?

00:42:00.000 We've got to upgrade you tonight.

00:42:01.000 The pistol's different.

00:42:01.000 Oh, good, because I told you she took the rifle.

00:42:03.000 You might have to hide the pistol.

00:42:04.000 The rifle's cool.

00:42:06.000 The rifle comes with an infrared sight.

00:42:08.000 Ooh.

00:42:09.000 Right?

00:42:09.000 And it's pretty cool.

00:42:10.000 It's accurate within, I think, four feet.

00:42:12.000 But you pump it.

00:42:13.000 Right?

00:42:13.000 And that's cool.

00:42:14.000 That'll knock a fly out of the sky.

00:42:15.000 But the pistol's called the shredder.

00:42:18.000 Now, the shredder, okay, It comes with a CO2 cartridge.

00:42:24.000 And it's a revolver.

00:42:26.000 So it literally has little revolver things.

00:42:28.000 You rub it in salt, load it up.

00:42:30.000 Yeah, yeah, [...

00:42:32.000 Bug assault shredder.

00:42:34.000 And you can get a little holster for it.

00:42:36.000 And bro, when I tell you, because now that thing, it'll rip a fly to pieces.

00:42:40.000 You hit a fly with that motherfucker and it's dead.

00:42:42.000 That's what I'm talking about.

00:42:43.000 Yeah, man.

00:42:44.000 I need one of these.

00:42:46.000 Yeah.

00:42:46.000 No, I got you.

00:42:47.000 We have them at the club.

00:42:48.000 I get fucked up by mosquitoes in my yard.

00:42:51.000 Because, you know, I'm out there doing archery.

00:42:53.000 And I'll do it during the day with shorts on because it's 95 fucking degrees out there.

00:42:57.000 And I'm out there for two hours.

00:42:59.000 And I come inside and my ankles are just brutalized.

00:43:02.000 Yeah.

00:43:03.000 Well, they call them no-see-ums.

00:43:04.000 This is made for cockroaches.

00:43:06.000 Oh, my God.

00:43:07.000 Holy shit.

00:43:08.000 Except for big bucks.

00:43:10.000 Bro, it just blows him away.

00:43:11.000 Bang!

00:43:12.000 Let me see.

00:43:13.000 Boom!

00:43:14.000 Are you shooting salt into your fucking food?

00:43:16.000 Well, if it's popcorn, it's fine.

00:43:18.000 This is just such a setup.

00:43:19.000 Oh, that guy got fucked up.

00:43:20.000 Yeah, bro.

00:43:21.000 Boom, son!

00:43:23.000 I mean, what did they do for this commercial?

00:43:25.000 They let those roaches on that stuff.

00:43:27.000 They probably had them in a bucket.

00:43:29.000 They just dumped them on the table.

00:43:31.000 I'm telling you, it's so satisfying.

00:43:32.000 America, man, I'm giving these guys free game right now.

00:43:36.000 But I'm telling you, there's no more satisfying feeling.

00:43:39.000 Then shooting one of the motherfuckers out the sky or shooting it off or something.

00:43:43.000 If you live in Texas, every time you open your door, something flies in your house.

00:43:48.000 That's just part of living out here.

00:43:50.000 Every single day something flying is in my house.

00:43:52.000 And every single day I kill that motherfucker and it feels so good.

00:43:55.000 I have two of those.

00:43:56.000 I have one upstairs and one downstairs.

00:43:57.000 So no matter where I am, I don't gotta leave the floor.

00:44:01.000 I go right away and I talk shit the whole time.

00:44:04.000 I'm like, oh, you think shit's sweet up in here?

00:44:07.000 No, no, no.

00:44:08.000 Anyway.

00:44:09.000 We got a fire ant problem, too.

00:44:11.000 Oh, yeah.

00:44:12.000 Those little motherfuckers.

00:44:13.000 Woof.

00:44:14.000 Man.

00:44:14.000 It's very impressive, the mounds that they make.

00:44:17.000 Those guys go ham.

00:44:18.000 Yeah.

00:44:19.000 Texas is well out with the bugs.

00:44:20.000 I feel like every kind of bug in the world is here.

00:44:22.000 Bugs, snakes.

00:44:24.000 I got a booklet that they sell at the supermarket of the snakes from Central Texas, like what's dangerous and what's not.

00:44:30.000 That's here in Austin?

00:44:31.000 Yeah.

00:44:31.000 Oh, wow.

00:44:32.000 Yeah.

00:44:33.000 My friend called me.

00:44:34.000 She goes, what is this?

00:44:35.000 And she sent me photos or videos of two big-ass coral snakes in her garage.

00:44:40.000 And I'm like, those are real bad.

00:44:42.000 Get those fucking things out of there.

00:44:44.000 That'll kill you.

00:44:45.000 Oh, yeah.

00:44:46.000 Yeah, a coral snake can kill you.

00:44:47.000 Yeah.

00:44:48.000 They usually aren't trying to fuck with you, though.

00:44:49.000 No.

00:44:50.000 No, they don't.

00:44:51.000 The problem is sometimes you don't know they're there.

00:44:53.000 Right.

00:44:54.000 And so you're stepping and you step too close to them and they bite you.

00:44:57.000 And it's a wrap.

00:44:58.000 Especially if you're not looking.

00:45:00.000 You know, you just wander through the woods.

00:45:01.000 God, it's so beautiful out here.

00:45:03.000 Especially if you don't know what bit you.

00:45:04.000 That's a whole other thing.

00:45:05.000 Oh, yeah.

00:45:05.000 And you don't get to a hospital.

00:45:07.000 Yeah, you got to get to the hospital with the thing that killed you.

00:45:09.000 You got to know what it was.

00:45:10.000 Right.

00:45:11.000 You know?

00:45:11.000 I'm sure hospitals out here probably carry antivenom.

00:45:14.000 My dogs got bit a ton of times by rattlesnakes.

00:45:17.000 Really?

00:45:17.000 Yeah, my pit bulls.

00:45:18.000 Back when I used to have pit bulls, anything in that yard was dead.

00:45:22.000 You know, I saw a video the other day, this might not be true, but who knows what you learn off the internet, but cats are like quicker than snakes.

00:45:29.000 Oh yeah, they're way quicker.

00:45:30.000 Their reflexes are way harder than snakes.

00:45:31.000 There's a great video of a snake trying to bite a kitten, like a young cat, and the cat's like, WAP! Shut the fuck up with that.

00:45:39.000 The cat will hit you two times.

00:45:41.000 You're my favorite.

00:45:42.000 Listen.

00:45:45.000 After you do comedy for so long, it's the real silly shit that gets at you.

00:45:49.000 It's not like the intricate shit.

00:45:51.000 It's like the silly shit that makes me laugh.

00:45:53.000 Tony Baker doing voiceovers of cat videos.

00:45:57.000 You know Tony Baker?

00:45:58.000 The comedian?

00:45:59.000 Yeah.

00:45:59.000 He's one of the funniest motherfuckers alive.

00:46:01.000 And he does these voiceovers of animal videos.

00:46:04.000 And when it's a cat thing...

00:46:05.000 So he has all these different phrases, but when a cat hits somebody, he calls it a skibbity-pap.

00:46:10.000 And he'll...

00:46:12.000 You gotta find one of these jokes.

00:46:14.000 Like, it's one of these...

00:46:16.000 Help me, brother.

00:46:18.000 Help you.

00:46:19.000 That's not...

00:46:20.000 Is this Tony Baker?

00:46:23.000 I'll live the king.

00:46:27.000 Bro, cats fighting on roofs is crazy.

00:46:32.000 They die sometimes.

00:46:33.000 Those little motherfuckers can fall really far, though.

00:46:35.000 I mean, my cat goes outside.

00:46:37.000 I worry about her all the time, but she's a savvy one, man.

00:46:41.000 You've always let your cat go out.

00:46:43.000 Yeah.

00:46:43.000 When I got her, she was like an outdoor cat.

00:46:46.000 Oh.

00:46:47.000 Yeah, they don't take kindly to being stuck indoors, those outdoor cats.

00:46:51.000 Nah.

00:46:52.000 They'll start pissing on you.

00:46:53.000 Right here right now, I don't like what's happening right here.

00:46:55.000 I don't like how you're holding my arm and licking my chest.

00:46:58.000 I don't like what's happening right here.

00:47:00.000 I'll rip your paw pads loose and put them in a nice little broth and let that simmer while I see all your cats fur to the highest bidder and all your goddamn catnip, you understand me?

00:47:10.000 But hey, to each his own.

00:47:11.000 You know what I'm saying?

00:47:12.000 Whatever you're into.

00:47:14.000 It's so funny.

00:47:15.000 You see a Labrador growling.

00:47:18.000 Like, bitch, you're so faking it.

00:47:20.000 Oh, yeah.

00:47:21.000 They're the nicest dogs in the world.

00:47:23.000 And most of those families that have cats and dogs, the cat is ruling the rules.

00:47:26.000 Yeah, they smack the dog right in the fucking face.

00:47:28.000 Did you ever see the video of the girls talking about her pronouns and the cat turns and smacks her in the face?

00:47:33.000 No.

00:47:33.000 It's hilarious.

00:47:35.000 What?

00:47:35.000 So there's a girl, like, holding her cat and she's being serious about her pronouns and this cat turns around and goes, Shut the fuck up.

00:47:42.000 And she's like, oh.

00:47:43.000 Hi, my name is Erin.

00:47:44.000 I use she, her pronouns, and I am this.

00:47:54.000 And you know what, dude?

00:47:56.000 It was probably her fault.

00:47:58.000 My cat only acts up.

00:48:02.000 Hilarious.

00:48:03.000 That cat was like, shut the fuck up.

00:48:06.000 Shut the fuck up.

00:48:07.000 No warning.

00:48:07.000 Just shut the fuck up.

00:48:08.000 You should have fed him.

00:48:09.000 My cat only acts up when I'm wrong.

00:48:11.000 She's never wrong.

00:48:12.000 You know, something's always wrong.

00:48:14.000 If she acting up, it's either something's wrong health-wise, or I'm late feeding her, or her litter box is dirty, like something.

00:48:22.000 It's always something I didn't do.

00:48:23.000 She never just starts acting a certain way.

00:48:24.000 So then she probably was fucking something up.

00:48:26.000 Well, she's annoying.

00:48:28.000 Wash the water bowl, bitch.

00:48:31.000 If you're annoying about that, you're probably annoying about other stuff.

00:48:33.000 The cat was like, she need to change my fucking water bowl.

00:48:38.000 The litter box thing is rough.

00:48:39.000 If you don't change litter boxes all the time, people go to their house and it smells like piss.

00:48:44.000 All factory senses are interesting in that they detect change.

00:48:50.000 They don't detect static smell.

00:48:52.000 So you get used to being...

00:48:54.000 If you live in a town that has a slaughterhouse...

00:48:57.000 You get used to that.

00:48:58.000 If you live in a town that's got, like, a lot of agricultural chemicals around, that terrible smell...

00:49:03.000 Like, my parents used to live in Pennsylvania, and I used to drive to visit them through Jersey.

00:49:07.000 And when you're going through Pennsylvania, going to where they lived, there was a lot of, like, agriculture.

00:49:13.000 And the smell was so bad.

00:49:15.000 You roll down the window, you're like, what the fuck?

00:49:18.000 These people live with that every day, but they don't notice it after a while.

00:49:21.000 Right, right.

00:49:21.000 So, like, that's the thing with people's houses, when you go over there and they have a box of piss.

00:49:26.000 Like, hey, you gotta get rid of this.

00:49:28.000 Like, you have a box of piss in your house.

00:49:30.000 Plus, man, the technology is so high now.

00:49:32.000 Yeah.

00:49:33.000 Yeah, my cat.

00:49:34.000 Oh, they have those things that...

00:49:35.000 Yeah, they got the automatic joints.

00:49:39.000 It's like, it don't make sense.

00:49:40.000 It's a little drawer.

00:49:41.000 Just put the drawer, change it.

00:49:43.000 Yeah.

00:49:43.000 Yeah, but then, if you got an outdoor cat, like, you know, she shits outside somewhere.

00:49:47.000 I have no idea where she shits.

00:49:48.000 Pfft!

00:49:49.000 I have no idea where she shits at.

00:49:51.000 And I don't clean it up.

00:49:52.000 I think they bury it a little.

00:49:54.000 Do your roommates take care of her when you go out of town?

00:49:56.000 No.

00:49:57.000 No?

00:49:57.000 I mean, I'm sure they watch out for her, but not anymore.

00:50:00.000 The only time...

00:50:01.000 They leave food out for her?

00:50:02.000 No, I'll have Sam.

00:50:03.000 You know Sam?

00:50:03.000 Their ex-fiancee, Sam?

00:50:04.000 Yeah.

00:50:06.000 She runs bottom of the barrel with me.

00:50:09.000 I would rather her do it.

00:50:11.000 Men don't.

00:50:12.000 Yeah.

00:50:12.000 Right.

00:50:13.000 Exactly.

00:50:13.000 Because they'll take care of her, but they won't do what I would do.

00:50:16.000 She'd do what I would do.

00:50:17.000 Right.

00:50:18.000 But only if I'm going for more than a few days.

00:50:21.000 If I'm doing like four days somewhere, then I'll just have her go check on her a little bit.

00:50:25.000 If you have a cat and you come back home after a couple days, the cat's like, oh, look, you're back.

00:50:28.000 No.

00:50:29.000 No, this bitch don't like it.

00:50:30.000 She gets mad at you?

00:50:31.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:50:32.000 Really?

00:50:32.000 She's always upset, yeah.

00:50:33.000 Really?

00:50:34.000 What does she do?

00:50:35.000 Does she meow at you?

00:50:35.000 She got like abandonment issues.

00:50:37.000 So she always, whenever I leave for more than a day, she thinks I'm going to leave her.

00:50:41.000 Oh, yeah.

00:50:42.000 I've had strays, stray dogs that were like that.

00:50:45.000 Yeah.

00:50:45.000 It's so sad.

00:50:46.000 But man, the bitch, fine.

00:50:48.000 She got two fountains.

00:50:49.000 She got a dad home.

00:50:50.000 She just doesn't know.

00:50:51.000 Yeah.

00:50:51.000 She doesn't need a lot.

00:50:52.000 Her food, the bowl is automatic.

00:50:54.000 The water fountains are automatic.

00:50:55.000 She got two of those.

00:50:56.000 The litter box is automatic.

00:50:58.000 That food can't be good, that dry-ass bullshit food.

00:51:00.000 No, no.

00:51:01.000 I mean, I feed her wet food when I'm home.

00:51:02.000 Right.

00:51:03.000 But, like I said, I couldn't trust anybody else to do it.

00:51:06.000 I wonder if cats get mercury poisoning from, like, eating tuna and shit like that.

00:51:11.000 I think they, uh...

00:51:13.000 Is that an issue with cats?

00:51:14.000 I think their kidneys are pretty fucking strong.

00:51:16.000 Yeah, but, I mean, mercury is...

00:51:19.000 It's a heavy metal poison.

00:51:20.000 I don't think it's good for any animal.

00:51:22.000 And they're not giving them sushi grade fish.

00:51:25.000 Well, a lot of those, that's true, but a lot of those tuna, they're riddled with it because the big fish are the ones that are eating the most little fish and a lot of the little fish are the ones that have the heavy metal poison.

00:51:34.000 They can get it.

00:51:35.000 Oh, they can.

00:51:36.000 Look at this.

00:51:37.000 Animals do not show signs until several weeks after being poisoned by organic mercury.

00:51:41.000 Signs can include blindness, excitement, abnormal behavior, and chewing, lack of coordination, and convulsions.

00:51:49.000 Cats show hind leg rigidity, lack of coordination, and tremors.

00:51:54.000 Neurologic signs may be irreversible.

00:51:57.000 Oh, no.

00:51:58.000 So it's not common to cats, but it may be the first thing a veterinarian suspects.

00:52:03.000 So it's possible that mercury poisoning happens, but is not diagnosed.

00:52:06.000 Oh, it may not be the first thing a veterinarian suspects.

00:52:09.000 Oh, wow.

00:52:10.000 I had a dog once, a puppy that I got.

00:52:14.000 And it had distemper.

00:52:15.000 And you can't fix that in a puppy.

00:52:17.000 What is distemper?

00:52:18.000 Distemper is horrible.

00:52:20.000 Is it parvo or distemper?

00:52:23.000 Are they the same thing?

00:52:25.000 It's a horrible virus that puppies get.

00:52:28.000 And he would just go into these terrible convulsions, like these seizures.

00:52:33.000 It was so sad.

00:52:35.000 Wow.

00:52:35.000 He's the cutest little guy, and there's nothing they can do about it.

00:52:39.000 There's nothing they can do about it.

00:52:40.000 At the time, at least.

00:52:41.000 It was 20 plus years.

00:52:42.000 Watching something cute die is difficult.

00:52:44.000 Oh, it was so horrible.

00:52:45.000 He was so adorable.

00:52:46.000 He was such a little sweetie.

00:52:48.000 It's not the same thing.

00:52:50.000 So, just temper and parvo are not the same disease, but both are highly contagious viral diseases that could cause serious symptoms and even death, especially for unvaccinated puppies and adult dogs.

00:53:01.000 Yeah.

00:53:02.000 Does temporary hepatitis pair influence?

00:53:05.000 I got him from the pound and you know he's a rescue puppy and you know and sometimes when you know they're around who knows where they are before the pound gets them and he was already infected.

00:53:14.000 So sad.

00:53:15.000 He's such a cute little guy.

00:53:17.000 Why'd you take him home if he was already going to die?

00:53:19.000 I didn't know.

00:53:20.000 I didn't know until after I had him.

00:53:22.000 He started showing symptoms a while after we got him.

00:53:28.000 He was real young, too.

00:53:29.000 It was awful.

00:53:30.000 Oh, that's tough.

00:53:32.000 He was so cute.

00:53:33.000 I haven't lost my pet yet.

00:53:34.000 I mean, I've had animals down me, but they were never mine.

00:53:37.000 I don't know what I'll do if something happened to this.

00:53:39.000 I saw a dead deer on the side of the highway.

00:53:41.000 I got sad.

00:53:42.000 This is a deer out here dropping their fawns.

00:53:44.000 So you got these cute little baby deer that are running around.

00:53:47.000 And when we were walking the other day, and the mother deer ran away and left the fawn, and the fawn just lies down on the ground because they're so small they can't run yet.

00:53:58.000 And so the mother tries to distract you by running away so that you chase her, and hopefully the fawn kind of blends into the grass.

00:54:06.000 Oh.

00:54:07.000 Yeah.

00:54:08.000 They don't have any defense mechanisms.

00:54:09.000 They're too small.

00:54:10.000 So for the first, I don't know how many days, they really can't run away.

00:54:14.000 Now they can kind of run away.

00:54:15.000 Like now I see the same little baby deer, and now they're running around.

00:54:19.000 Wow.

00:54:19.000 But it's like they're so vulnerable.

00:54:21.000 That's a bad plan for mother deers.

00:54:23.000 Well, it's a plan that ensures that there's going to be less deer because you can't have too many deer.

00:54:29.000 It can't be perfect where they come out running full split.

00:54:35.000 Coyotes would never get them.

00:54:36.000 Well, that's more planning than those submarine people.

00:54:40.000 That shit pisses me off the more I think about it.

00:54:42.000 It scares the shit out of me.

00:54:44.000 It just seems like a horrific way to die.

00:54:46.000 How you don't have a plan B? See, you know what's so strange about that whole situation to me?

00:54:49.000 I was telling Jamie earlier.

00:54:52.000 Is that they have what?

00:54:55.000 They started out with like four days worth of air, Jamie?

00:54:58.000 Yeah.

00:54:59.000 So someone thought if something goes wrong, they're going to need extra oxygen.

00:55:04.000 Yeah.

00:55:05.000 Right?

00:55:05.000 Because the trip was less than a day.

00:55:07.000 But they have four days worth of air.

00:55:08.000 So someone was thinking about what they might need in an emergency.

00:55:12.000 And they stopped right there.

00:55:14.000 They gave them extra air and then no other way to get out of a bad situation.

00:55:17.000 Like they can't control it from inside of it.

00:55:19.000 There's no emergency surface button.

00:55:22.000 There's no transponder.

00:55:23.000 They don't control it from inside of it?

00:55:25.000 No, it's controlled from the ship.

00:55:26.000 Oh, Jesus.

00:55:27.000 Oh my God.

00:55:28.000 And the ship gotta be directly above it.

00:55:30.000 Oh, no!

00:55:32.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:55:32.000 Oh, no.

00:55:33.000 And if that doesn't happen, if somehow they lose contact with the ship, the ship is not directly above it, that's it.

00:55:40.000 There's no plan B. What?

00:55:42.000 Yeah.

00:55:43.000 So is there a tide that moved them away from under the ship?

00:55:47.000 What the fuck happened?

00:55:47.000 I have no idea.

00:55:48.000 Maybe somebody crashed.

00:55:50.000 Maybe that window failed at a certain depth.

00:55:54.000 That's what I think happened.

00:55:55.000 I think the thing failed.

00:55:57.000 I think they're dead.

00:55:58.000 I think it imploded on them.

00:56:00.000 Why do you think that?

00:56:01.000 Because it seems like...

00:56:03.000 What do you think the banging is?

00:56:06.000 I think the banging is just, it's banging up against something, or maybe the banging is something else.

00:56:11.000 Maybe it's the ship shaking.

00:56:12.000 You know, they've never measured the sounds around that area.

00:56:15.000 It's not like they can say that that banging is outside the norm.

00:56:18.000 Oh, really?

00:56:19.000 Yeah, I mean, the Titanic's down there.

00:56:20.000 It's probably still creaking and swinging, and who knows what that banging is.

00:56:24.000 And I could be wrong, that could be them banging.

00:56:27.000 Seems like a waste of energy.

00:56:28.000 Nobody's going to hear you.

00:56:29.000 But if someone is hearing them...

00:56:31.000 Oh, like they're thinking, oh, the sonar will hear them.

00:56:33.000 Well, I guess that's what it's for.

00:56:34.000 Yeah.

00:56:35.000 I think they've heard it through a plane.

00:56:38.000 Is that true?

00:56:39.000 Yeah.

00:56:39.000 So there's a plane that detected the bang.

00:56:41.000 But it's still unconfirmed.

00:56:43.000 From what I was just reading.

00:56:45.000 Someone's claiming they heard that.

00:56:48.000 But at this point, we know there's no hope of saving them.

00:56:52.000 Even if they're alive, like right now...

00:56:56.000 How do they get them out?

00:56:57.000 How do they get them out?

00:56:58.000 Do they have another one of those things?

00:57:00.000 Even if they were on the surface right now, like if they had risen to the surface somehow, there is an emergency.

00:57:05.000 They still can't breathe.

00:57:06.000 They can't open it.

00:57:07.000 They can't open it from the inside.

00:57:09.000 So they have to find them to save them.

00:57:13.000 And even if they found them right now, they got to bring them to the surface slowly.

00:57:17.000 You know, they can't bring them up too fast.

00:57:20.000 So who even fucking knows, man?

00:57:22.000 How long does it take to get them to the surface?

00:57:25.000 You know, I don't know.

00:57:27.000 But it's longer than you'd be comfortable with.

00:57:31.000 So I think it's not about how much air they have left, right?

00:57:34.000 It's about do they have enough hours of air left that it would take them to braze them to the surface?

00:57:41.000 And open that hatch.

00:57:43.000 How do they even plant?

00:57:44.000 See if there's like some sort of a detailed strategy.

00:57:47.000 A retrieval.

00:57:48.000 Oh, I'm looking.

00:57:49.000 How could they possibly get it out?

00:57:51.000 What I've found so far is that during...

00:57:54.000 They spoke with somebody else.

00:57:56.000 One of the writers for The Simpsons or creators for The Simpsons or something took this tour last year.

00:58:02.000 And they had problems on their trip.

00:58:07.000 Three times, or it says, communication was lost during all three of his dives, including that to the Titanic.

00:58:14.000 It's like when they were trying to do it for TV, they couldn't even find the Titanic or something.

00:58:20.000 The boat has to be near the sub so communication can happen, and if they are not near each other, communication is just gone.

00:58:30.000 What the fuck, man?

00:58:32.000 GPS doesn't work underwater, nor does radio.

00:58:37.000 Oh my god.

00:58:39.000 And they don't have a line attached to it?

00:58:42.000 Yeah, that's like some...

00:58:43.000 No.

00:58:44.000 In theory, which is probably not correct, it could have resurfaced at some point, and it's just floating somewhere, and it can't get out, you know?

00:58:51.000 What?

00:58:52.000 This says there's seven different...

00:58:54.000 Not backups, but there are seven different possibilities for it to resurface, and they're like, well, if none of those happened, the other possibilities are that there was a leak, in which case there's no backup vessel...

00:59:07.000 You're kind of fucked.

00:59:09.000 Oh my god.

00:59:10.000 Yeah, any kind of leak, any kind of opening at that depth is gonna kill everybody.

00:59:14.000 It's so scary.

00:59:16.000 Yeah.

00:59:17.000 That's such a scary, cause it's so slow.

00:59:19.000 Like getting down there so slow and knowing that all that water is above you.

00:59:24.000 Miles!

00:59:25.000 Yeah, just a column of water sitting on top of you.

00:59:29.000 Two miles down, basically.

00:59:31.000 Oh, Jesus!

00:59:33.000 And then imagine you sitting there thinking about the one motherfucker that was trying to tell you that window wasn't good.

00:59:40.000 Yeah.

00:59:41.000 Right.

00:59:41.000 The guy who's sweating it, the CEO, who has the information.

00:59:45.000 Yeah.

00:59:45.000 Because if we got to kill somebody to save Aaron, we kill him first.

00:59:48.000 I'm talking a group into it.

00:59:50.000 Hey, man.

00:59:51.000 You know what?

00:59:52.000 You had a good run.

00:59:54.000 Boy, everybody involved in that company is fucked.

00:59:57.000 Somebody gonna pay for that.

00:59:59.000 Oh my god.

01:00:00.000 One of the guys was a billionaire.

01:00:01.000 Well, it depends on which political party makes it their issue.

01:00:05.000 If the Republicans make it their issue, somebody gonna pay for that.

01:00:07.000 What is happening with that Sam Bankman Freed guy?

01:00:10.000 I heard they dropped five of his charges.

01:00:14.000 Which is wild.

01:00:15.000 I wonder how that happens.

01:00:16.000 Which is wild.

01:00:17.000 They just quietly did that while they're telling us about aliens.

01:00:20.000 Yeah, man.

01:00:22.000 This is the death of truth.

01:00:24.000 This is the age where you can't tell what's true, you can't tell who's who, who's being bribed, who's not, who has an agenda.

01:00:31.000 So now, people are going based off It's like what you're likely to believe is whatever you want to be true.

01:00:38.000 Did you see that James O'Keefe left Project Veritas?

01:00:43.000 He's the guy that does all those gotcha videos, investigative reporter videos.

01:00:47.000 No, I don't know.

01:00:47.000 Undercover videos.

01:00:49.000 He got a lot of them.

01:00:51.000 I don't know what led him to leave Project Veritas, but he started his own group.

01:00:56.000 And his own group yesterday, he got some guy...

01:00:59.000 From this corporation talking about how easy it is to bribe politicians.

01:01:04.000 So he's on a date.

01:01:05.000 Oh yeah, you sent me this Instagram thing.

01:01:07.000 Yeah.

01:01:07.000 Oh yeah.

01:01:08.000 It's wild.

01:01:10.000 Damn.

01:01:11.000 He's like, you know, you can get a senator for like 10 grand.

01:01:15.000 Does he know he's being recorded?

01:01:18.000 It doesn't look like he does.

01:01:19.000 No, he's on a date.

01:01:20.000 At some point he says that, he's like, you might be an undercover reporter, but then he still keeps telling the girls.

01:01:25.000 Yeah, because he's trying to be funny.

01:01:28.000 Find that.

01:01:29.000 I think he's trying to impress a girl.

01:01:31.000 But that's what it always is.

01:01:32.000 Like, a lot of them are these chatty gay guys, and they get some cute gay guy to go on dates with them.

01:01:37.000 Yeah, but there's one part of the video where he's, like, at a job fair or something.

01:01:41.000 He's just talking.

01:01:42.000 Yeah, so this is it.

01:01:43.000 Play it.

01:01:44.000 Oh, I mean, oh.

01:01:45.000 Okay.

01:01:47.000 I don't know, but I suspect it's probably because it's easier to do things when people aren't thinking about it.

01:01:53.000 All of these financial institutions, they buy politicians.

01:01:56.000 You can take this big f*** ton of money, and then you can start to buy people.

01:02:02.000 I work for a company called BlackRock.

01:02:04.000 Meet Serge Varley, a recruiter at BlackRock.

01:02:09.000 Let me tell you, it's not who's the president is.

01:02:12.000 It's who's controlling the wallet of the president.

01:02:19.000 And who's that?

01:02:20.000 The hedge funds, BlackRock, the banks.

01:02:22.000 These guys run the world.

01:02:24.000 Also, what a fucking- Campaign financing.

01:02:25.000 Yup, you can buy your candidates.

01:02:27.000 Look at this.

01:02:28.000 Obviously, we have the system in place.

01:02:29.000 First, there's the Senate.

01:02:31.000 This guy's fucking shit.

01:02:32.000 You got 10 grand, you can buy a Senate.

01:02:34.000 You got 10 grand, you can buy a senator.

01:02:36.000 500 grand.

01:02:38.000 Does, like, everybody do that?

01:02:40.000 Does BlackRock do that?

01:02:42.000 Everyone does what he's saying.

01:02:43.000 Doesn't matter who wins.

01:02:45.000 They're in my pocket at this point.

01:02:48.000 Wow.

01:02:49.000 What a loser.

01:02:50.000 Well, these people always, it's always single people on dates.

01:02:55.000 But who talks like this on a first date?

01:02:57.000 Guys do if they want to impress a girl.

01:02:59.000 The guys do if they want to let a girl know, like, hey, they're a fucking big mover shaker in this corporation, and this is how we do it.

01:03:05.000 We run the world.

01:03:06.000 We run the world.

01:03:07.000 Government secrets don't impress women, do they?

01:03:10.000 Well, that's not really government secrets.

01:03:12.000 It's corporate secrets.

01:03:14.000 It's them using their influence and money to affect the political system.

01:03:21.000 But it's, you know, it's power.

01:03:23.000 And, you know, when a guy can talk about how much power he has to a girl on a date...

01:03:28.000 It's probably very intoxicating.

01:03:30.000 Let her know.

01:03:30.000 I'm running shit, baby.

01:03:31.000 You're like, hey girl, I have several moral failings, but I'm successful.

01:03:34.000 What's that?

01:03:35.000 I googled his name.

01:03:36.000 Yep.

01:03:36.000 And when you click this, they removed it.

01:03:40.000 They removed it.

01:03:40.000 Yeah, of course they removed it.

01:03:41.000 I also don't know when I got added.

01:03:43.000 Yeah, but of course they removed it.

01:03:45.000 They always do that when someone gets busted.

01:03:47.000 He definitely don't work for Black Rock no more.

01:03:49.000 Oh, he's in trouble.

01:03:51.000 Yeah, he's probably dead.

01:03:51.000 Yeah, he's probably at the Clinton's ranch.

01:03:54.000 Swinging from a tree.

01:03:56.000 The shotgun wound in his asshole.

01:03:59.000 Yeah.

01:03:59.000 He killed himself by shooting himself in the asshole.

01:04:02.000 Yeah, it's not good for him.

01:04:05.000 But they'll just disavow him, and none of the major media networks will cover that.

01:04:10.000 That's where it gets interesting.

01:04:12.000 Yeah.

01:04:12.000 Because when something like this happens, whether it's a pharmaceutical company, he's done that with a lot of those people, like Pfizer, he got this guy talking about engineering viruses, and it never makes the news.

01:04:23.000 I'm going to try that on my next date.

01:04:24.000 Hey, girl, I've grabbed several public officials.

01:04:27.000 Let's go back to my place.

01:04:29.000 Yeah, I think it's, you know, she's also asking the right questions, like saying that she's curious.

01:04:35.000 So he gets to show how much he knows, you know?

01:04:39.000 Imagine you having a good date and this girl just destroys you.

01:04:42.000 Just destroys you.

01:04:44.000 Puts you on a hit list somewhere.

01:04:46.000 She probably didn't even fuck him.

01:04:48.000 No, she didn't fuck him.

01:04:49.000 I know.

01:04:50.000 That's the whole thing.

01:04:52.000 She got free dinner, a hot scoop, and then destroyed your ass.

01:04:57.000 You get a couple of cocktails in someone like that, you know?

01:05:01.000 And they don't think about what they're saying.

01:05:03.000 Next thing you know, you're giving up some serious global details.

01:05:08.000 But then won't that always be...

01:05:09.000 I mean, that pretty much gives Black Rock a way out.

01:05:12.000 It's like, oh, he was just trying to get laid.

01:05:13.000 He don't know what he's talking about.

01:05:14.000 For sure.

01:05:15.000 Yeah.

01:05:15.000 Oh, yeah.

01:05:16.000 He could totally be full of shit.

01:05:17.000 I mean, that's literally what one of the guys said that they busted.

01:05:20.000 He goes, I'm an actual liar.

01:05:22.000 He goes, I'm on a date.

01:05:23.000 I'm trying to impress my date.

01:05:24.000 I'm lying.

01:05:24.000 Oh, right.

01:05:25.000 The guy said that, like, on the spot.

01:05:26.000 And maybe he was telling the truth.

01:05:28.000 You know, people definitely lie on dates and pretend they know more than they know.

01:05:32.000 If she recorded him being like, yeah, I have a 12-inch dick, people wouldn't be like, well, that must be true.

01:05:36.000 Right.

01:05:36.000 He said it on tape.

01:05:37.000 True, right?

01:05:38.000 Yeah.

01:05:39.000 Yeah, but it seems like what he was saying is based on personal experience.

01:05:44.000 But we already knew that was true.

01:05:47.000 He said he was a recruiter, so he's never done any of that stuff.

01:05:50.000 Right.

01:05:51.000 Also, if it only costs $10,000 to buy a senator, I feel like...

01:05:56.000 We should own them all.

01:05:57.000 You could own them all.

01:05:59.000 Yeah, at least for one election cycle.

01:06:01.000 Yeah, I wonder how that works with political donations.

01:06:03.000 That's what Trump always said.

01:06:05.000 He donated to people to make things happen.

01:06:07.000 He donated to people for this.

01:06:09.000 He went to their weddings.

01:06:10.000 Yeah, he donates to their charity where they also happen to be an employee.

01:06:16.000 Didn't he say he paid Hillary Clinton and Bill Clinton to be at his wedding?

01:06:22.000 Oh, that's funny.

01:06:23.000 I think it was either his wedding or one of his kids' weddings.

01:06:26.000 I think you can pay people and they'll do an appearance.

01:06:30.000 Isn't that wild?

01:06:31.000 That sounds like torture.

01:06:32.000 How wild is that, though?

01:06:34.000 Yeah.

01:06:35.000 Give me $250,000, I'll show up at your wedding.

01:06:37.000 I mean, just to be there, that might be worth the trip.

01:06:41.000 I think they're doing that all the time, so it adds up.

01:06:44.000 You know, Donald Trump, he probably didn't have their meals covered.

01:06:47.000 He's like, well, I'll just, I'll pay you to come, then you do read the contract.

01:06:49.000 It's not an open bar.

01:06:50.000 Right.

01:06:51.000 It's a bar that has money.

01:06:53.000 It's expensive.

01:06:55.000 What is, um, what was the story with that?

01:06:57.000 Is that legit?

01:06:58.000 Did he say that?

01:07:00.000 He said that.

01:07:02.000 What'd he say?

01:07:03.000 I was trying to find the video of it, but it's not coming up.

01:07:06.000 But their quote is written here.

01:07:09.000 It says, if you're to believe him.

01:07:11.000 I'll tell you what.

01:07:11.000 With Hillary Clinton, I said, be at my wedding, and she came to my wedding, Trump applied.

01:07:16.000 You know why?

01:07:16.000 She had no choice, because I gave.

01:07:19.000 He added that he gave money to the Clinton Global Foundation without understanding how his funds would be used.

01:07:24.000 I didn't know the money would be used on private jets going all over the world, he said.

01:07:29.000 It was.

01:07:30.000 Clinton had a front row seat at Donald Trump's wedding, his third wedding, in 2005. The Clinton team didn't immediately respond to a request for comment on whether the Clintons only attended Trump's wedding because he contributed to her Senate campaign.

01:07:43.000 Well, they're all in cahoots.

01:07:44.000 Just give them some money.

01:07:46.000 Give some money.

01:07:47.000 And then they use it on private jets.

01:07:49.000 Don't do anything for money.

01:07:50.000 Isn't that crazy, though?

01:07:51.000 They could just use it on private jets.

01:07:52.000 They just got like a private jet slush fund.

01:07:55.000 Oh, yeah.

01:07:56.000 I'm not surprised at all.

01:07:57.000 Like, that's why I don't feel bad for people.

01:07:59.000 Like, once you hit a certain amount of money...

01:08:01.000 The system is set up for you to never go broke again.

01:08:04.000 Oh, yeah.

01:08:05.000 If you use it correctly, and they use it to the most.

01:08:08.000 Yeah.

01:08:09.000 Yeah, they make the loophole.

01:08:11.000 So they use every single loophole to benefit them to make sure they will never go broke and their kids will never go broke.

01:08:16.000 Especially bankers.

01:08:17.000 I mean, when banks fail, the government bails them out.

01:08:21.000 Yeah.

01:08:22.000 It's set up so, what do they call it?

01:08:25.000 Private risk, public, no, public risk, private benefit or whatever the fuck?

01:08:29.000 Kodak Black's lawyer slams Hunter, bud.

01:08:31.000 Kodak Black's lawyer slams Hunter Biden plea deal after a rapper sentenced to three-plus years for the same crime.

01:08:38.000 Attorney for rapper questioned different outcomes for his client.

01:08:41.000 Didn't Kodak Black had a lot of drugs?

01:08:44.000 Yeah, but Lil Wayne, I think, had a similar charge and had worse penalties than...

01:08:49.000 Was it him with drugs, too?

01:08:52.000 I don't know exactly each case.

01:08:54.000 I know it's a case-by-case basis, but there are a lot of people that are mad about Hunter's situation.

01:08:59.000 But to be fair, though, this is not Kodak Black's first conviction.

01:09:03.000 Oh, what has he done?

01:09:04.000 I don't know, but I think he just got out of prison.

01:09:07.000 Oh.

01:09:08.000 Well, this might have been because of that.

01:09:10.000 I think that's why he said, yeah, like his lawyer said, two tiers of justice.

01:09:14.000 He was charged for the same crime and did three years.

01:09:16.000 Hunter Biden will not serve a day.

01:09:19.000 Okay.

01:09:20.000 Hmm.

01:09:21.000 Yeah.

01:09:22.000 But also don't know if, I mean, I haven't looked back at Hunter Biden.

01:09:25.000 Did he never get arrested for any of his problems in the past?

01:09:27.000 Well, he said he was pardoned by Trump in 2021. Hunter Biden?

01:09:31.000 No.

01:09:31.000 Oh, Kodak Black.

01:09:32.000 Oh, he was.

01:09:33.000 He was pardoned by Trump.

01:09:33.000 For that?

01:09:34.000 For that same charge?

01:09:36.000 Yeah.

01:09:36.000 Isn't that wild, a pardon thing?

01:09:38.000 That's wild.

01:09:39.000 That you could just say, yeah, let him out.

01:09:41.000 It's wild who doesn't get one.

01:09:43.000 Right.

01:09:44.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:09:45.000 Like Julian Assange.

01:09:47.000 Right, Julian Assange.

01:09:48.000 Edward Snowden.

01:09:49.000 Edward Snowden.

01:09:50.000 Joe Exotic.

01:09:51.000 Yeah, Free Joe Exotic.

01:09:52.000 Who was the other Manning?

01:09:55.000 Bradley Manning?

01:09:56.000 Yeah.

01:09:57.000 Who's kind of connected to Julian Assange.

01:09:59.000 Yeah.

01:09:59.000 But also, he...

01:10:00.000 That's Chelsea Manning now.

01:10:02.000 Right, Chelsea Manning transitioned while in government custody for treason.

01:10:07.000 Yeah.

01:10:08.000 How did that happen?

01:10:09.000 No one ever talks about that.

01:10:10.000 Or did it happen after?

01:10:11.000 Because I thought...

01:10:13.000 I thought when she initially got arrested, it was Bradley Manning.

01:10:16.000 And while she was still in custody, it changed to Chelsea Manning.

01:10:19.000 I think so.

01:10:21.000 And I was like...

01:10:22.000 Because it seems like you're getting mistreated, but also if you can transition, they're treating you pretty...

01:10:30.000 Nice.

01:10:31.000 You know what I'm saying?

01:10:31.000 Yes.

01:10:32.000 In prison.

01:10:33.000 Right.

01:10:34.000 So I'm just always confused.

01:10:35.000 I wonder what the transition consists of.

01:10:39.000 I mean, someone can transition by just identifying as a woman now.

01:10:42.000 You just start dressing like a woman.

01:10:44.000 You can still keep your dick.

01:10:46.000 You can still keep your hormones.

01:10:47.000 I think most of them start taking hormones.

01:10:49.000 I don't know.

01:10:51.000 I don't know.

01:10:52.000 I don't know what the percentage is.

01:10:54.000 Listen, transitioning from a woman to a man would probably be easier, but I think women can tell you're not one of them.

01:11:03.000 You've got to take estrogen if you're transitioning to a woman, because you've got to think like them.

01:11:07.000 They can pick up on the vibe.

01:11:09.000 I don't think...

01:11:10.000 You're not taking your estrogen.

01:11:14.000 Like, what is this logic?

01:11:15.000 Do you know what autogynophilia is?

01:11:18.000 Autogynophilia?

01:11:19.000 Autogynophilia.

01:11:20.000 Autogynophilia.

01:11:21.000 Okay, I'm gonna guess.

01:11:22.000 Auto means happening without, like, unconsciously.

01:11:26.000 Gyna is vaginas, right?

01:11:29.000 Like a gynecologist, I'm guessing?

01:11:31.000 Yeah.

01:11:31.000 Philia means love.

01:11:33.000 Oh, so it means somebody that automatically loves pussy?

01:11:37.000 Ha ha [...

01:11:41.000 No, autogynophilia is men have a sexual fetish where they're attracted to women, but they want to dress up like a woman.

01:11:49.000 They want to dress up like a woman and fuck women.

01:11:52.000 Autogynophilia is defined as a male's propensity to be sexually aroused by the thought of himself as a female.

01:11:58.000 It's a paraphilia that is theorized to underline transvestism and some forms of male to female transsexualism.

01:12:08.000 So you used to be able to say this.

01:12:10.000 That was like a normal statement.

01:12:12.000 Now that is transphobic, which is really wild because it's been in the psychological literature forever.

01:12:19.000 It's a condition.

01:12:20.000 It's like Rocky Horror Picture Show shit.

01:12:22.000 Yeah, but it's a kink.

01:12:23.000 I got a homie like that.

01:12:24.000 He transitioned to a woman, but he fucks women.

01:12:27.000 He still loves women.

01:12:29.000 So maybe he loves women so much that he also wants to be a woman.

01:12:33.000 I think it just gets turned on by the idea of him being a woman.

01:12:36.000 I don't know.

01:12:37.000 It's just like, what is that?

01:12:40.000 My first girlfriend was like that.

01:12:42.000 She loved to masturbate in the mirror.

01:12:46.000 Oh, Jesus.

01:12:47.000 That's weird.

01:12:48.000 That's crazy.

01:12:49.000 I don't want to see nothing of myself.

01:12:51.000 Just looking at yourself.

01:12:54.000 Making a mean face at yourself.

01:12:56.000 Imagine thinking you're so hot that you make you cum.

01:12:59.000 Oh, boy.

01:13:00.000 That's crazy.

01:13:01.000 He's like, man, if I was a bitch, I'd do this better than these hoes.

01:13:06.000 Who knows what's going on with that?

01:13:09.000 You were telling me about a woman that transitioned to a man and started taking testosterone.

01:13:16.000 And then came up to you.

01:13:18.000 Actually, that happened twice.

01:13:19.000 I had two female friends that transitioned to male.

01:13:24.000 Oh, it's him fucking in the mirror.

01:13:26.000 Oh, yeah.

01:13:27.000 American Psycho.

01:13:28.000 That was a great movie, dude.

01:13:29.000 Awesome.

01:13:30.000 The book is even more fucked up.

01:13:32.000 But every trans man I know, every woman that transitioned to a man that I know personally, when they started taking testosterone, at some point, they walked up to me and was like, I get it.

01:13:43.000 I get it now.

01:13:44.000 Yeah.

01:13:45.000 Testosterone's a hell of a fucking thing to just start taking a high dose of.

01:13:47.000 Because you realize, oh, I want to fucking...

01:13:50.000 It's this aggression that gets introduced to you.

01:13:52.000 Yeah.

01:13:53.000 Yeah, and it hits every man at the worst possible time.

01:13:56.000 When your body's just getting coordinated, you don't know shit about life, and there's this drug that makes you want to fucking kill and dominate and win, and it's just the highest dose you're ever going to receive.

01:14:06.000 Yeah.

01:14:07.000 Yeah.

01:14:08.000 It's like, you take like 15 years for it to fucking wear off.

01:14:11.000 That's why they want people to join the Navy and the Army and the Marines when they're 17. Yeah.

01:14:16.000 18 years old.

01:14:17.000 Yeah, when they can whip you into a fervor with just a little speech.

01:14:21.000 Oh, yeah.

01:14:22.000 Get you fired up.

01:14:22.000 You're ready to kill.

01:14:23.000 Yeah, you want to live forever?

01:14:25.000 Yeah!

01:14:26.000 Yeah, see, now I'll be like, yeah, I do.

01:14:28.000 I would have got on that sub when I was 19. Of course.

01:14:33.000 But now I'm like, what the fuck is wrong with y'all?

01:14:35.000 What the fuck is wrong with you?

01:14:36.000 Yeah, I probably would have did it if I was young and stupid and I didn't understand consequences, but I probably would have been regretting it halfway down.

01:14:42.000 Not understanding consequences.

01:14:44.000 That's the most horrific of consequences.

01:14:47.000 And the whole world's watching, too.

01:14:48.000 Yeah.

01:14:49.000 Ooh.

01:14:51.000 Oh my god, that scares me.

01:14:52.000 And the thing is, because they're all rich, it's a joke.

01:14:57.000 I'm sure some people have empathy, but right away Twitter's like, Yep.

01:15:03.000 The memes are coming.

01:15:05.000 If you search right now on Twitter for the knocking sound, it's just beats.

01:15:10.000 It's like just real hip-hop songs.

01:15:12.000 People are like, I heard they was listening to this and it's just Young Jeezy.

01:15:15.000 Or it's like the new Killer Mike album.

01:15:16.000 I can't believe they got it down there.

01:15:18.000 It came out the same day.

01:15:19.000 What's that?

01:15:20.000 I heard a couple farts.

01:15:20.000 Just like listening to a knock and then just someone ripping ass.

01:15:23.000 The new Killer Mike album is fucking amazing.

01:15:25.000 It's very good.

01:15:26.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:15:27.000 It's very good.

01:15:27.000 David Lucas played it in the green room last night.

01:15:29.000 Yeah, it's very good.

01:15:30.000 This is Mike in his bag right here.

01:15:31.000 Yeah, he's in his own right now.

01:15:34.000 I try to talk him into doing a podcast.

01:15:36.000 I hope he listens.

01:15:37.000 Oh, man.

01:15:38.000 He'd have an amazing podcast.

01:15:39.000 That'd be incredible.

01:15:40.000 He'd have the best podcast out there.

01:15:42.000 He's so...

01:15:43.000 When he has to give public speeches about things, he's so good at that, man.

01:15:48.000 Yeah.

01:15:48.000 He's very articulate.

01:15:50.000 He's also empathetic and kind, like wise.

01:15:53.000 He's very wise.

01:15:55.000 Because he practices something that I learned from doing comedy for real, and it's that people...

01:16:02.000 If you ask somebody, is it okay to talk about this?

01:16:05.000 People will say yes or no or whatever.

01:16:07.000 But the way they respond to a joke, you breaking the shit down to where it's obvious that you've put a lot of thought into it is enough for most people to not have a negative reaction.

01:16:21.000 Even if it's a controversial subject.

01:16:24.000 So when he goes and gives speeches about controversial issues or he's talking to a group of people that all disagree with him, it's like he's so thoughtful.

01:16:32.000 That you can't not like him anyway.

01:16:35.000 Even if he's saying something that you totally don't agree with.

01:16:37.000 Right.

01:16:37.000 Yeah.

01:16:38.000 Yeah.

01:16:40.000 He understands how his words are being interpreted by the people that he's talking to.

01:16:44.000 He's very smooth and careful with how he does it.

01:16:49.000 Yeah, meticulous too.

01:16:50.000 Yeah.

01:16:51.000 No, he'd be an awesome podcast.

01:16:52.000 He's a great guest.

01:16:53.000 He's always got great opinions about things.

01:16:56.000 That's all you need.

01:16:57.000 And there's always room for more people like that.

01:17:00.000 I'm always trying to encourage interesting people to start podcasts.

01:17:04.000 It's such a great way to get stuff out there.

01:17:07.000 And for me, I want to hear how different people think.

01:17:11.000 I'm always wondering, why do I think like this?

01:17:14.000 What's the genesis of it?

01:17:16.000 You know what I love about doing my podcast?

01:17:17.000 It's not hugely popular yet, but it lets me...

01:17:23.000 It lets me get all my thoughts out without the obligation to be funny.

01:17:28.000 Because sometimes you gotta get through all of the unfunny to find the funny.

01:17:32.000 And you don't always have time to do that on stage.

01:17:35.000 You know what I mean?

01:17:36.000 So it's nice to just...

01:17:37.000 It's like finding a gold nugget, but it's all covered in shit.

01:17:44.000 You gotta chip off and wash off.

01:17:46.000 Sometimes the nugget's buried so deep that I don't have time to do it on stage.

01:17:51.000 I have to like...

01:17:52.000 Yeah, normally I would just be sitting there thinking those thoughts or saying them to myself.

01:17:56.000 Right, but when you're saying them out loud like that too, you're hashing them out and you're working it out in real time.

01:18:01.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:18:02.000 Tim's the best at that shit.

01:18:03.000 Tim Dillon is so funny off the cuff on those rants.

01:18:07.000 This motherfucker get started on a rant.

01:18:08.000 Oh my god, his rants are fucking incredible.

01:18:12.000 He's dystopian.

01:18:13.000 He's the best at ranting.

01:18:14.000 Yeah, he's the best.

01:18:15.000 He's the best at it.

01:18:16.000 And it translates to his stand-up.

01:18:18.000 His stand-up got way better after he started doing his podcast.

01:18:21.000 And it's a premise factory.

01:18:34.000 Tim talks a lot of shit but he bought a second house here.

01:18:37.000 He can shut the fuck up.

01:18:38.000 He bought a house out here.

01:18:41.000 I try to explain to people what Because I would never tell somebody, hey, this is better than New York or better than that.

01:18:48.000 Because that's a stupid argument to have.

01:18:50.000 But I feel like you should go wherever you're going to benefit the most.

01:18:56.000 Wherever you have the most connections, wherever you're going to get the most stage time.

01:19:00.000 And you get a lot of stage time out here.

01:19:03.000 Like Cam Patterson moved out here from Florida.

01:19:10.000 Listen, I saw this dude...

01:19:13.000 On the internet.

01:19:14.000 He had put a joke on Instagram and it came up on my feed and I liked it and followed him.

01:19:18.000 Follow me back.

01:19:20.000 A month and a half later, a mothership opens.

01:19:22.000 I'm standing outside smoking on the second day and he goes walking by me on the street.

01:19:27.000 He's like, hey, don't I know you?

01:19:28.000 He's like, oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:19:29.000 And I was like, did you move here?

01:19:31.000 He was like, yeah.

01:19:31.000 And I was like, hey, come in on Monday to the open mic.

01:19:35.000 He comes in.

01:19:35.000 Adam loves him.

01:19:36.000 He does Bottom of the Barrel the next day.

01:19:37.000 Adam's like, holy shit, Tony sees him.

01:19:39.000 Tony's like, I love this motherfucker.

01:19:41.000 Kill Tony.

01:19:42.000 Kill that shit.

01:19:43.000 And he went on the Kill Tony anniversary show.

01:19:45.000 Yeah, he was on the anniversary show.

01:19:46.000 And he's a door guy now.

01:19:48.000 And it's like, the whole life just changed up.

01:19:51.000 You know what I'm saying?

01:19:51.000 Well, I love the Door Guy program.

01:19:54.000 It's basically an advanced version of what we had at the store, but genuinely dedicated to development of new talent.

01:20:01.000 The Door Guys get so much stage time.

01:20:03.000 But we were talking about that before we ever did this.

01:20:05.000 When we were planning this out and we were hanging out in the Vulcan, we all were in agreement.

01:20:10.000 You've got to have two nights of open mic nights.

01:20:12.000 Oh, yeah.

01:20:12.000 You've got to have a lot of open mic.

01:20:13.000 Minimum.

01:20:14.000 Minimum.

01:20:15.000 That's how the store had it back in the day.

01:20:17.000 That's really the best way to do it.

01:20:19.000 And you can always have, you know, like last time we did open mic night, Bill Burr was in town.

01:20:23.000 He went up, like a bunch of people go up.

01:20:25.000 It'll be pros after the amateurs.

01:20:28.000 Well, I think a lot of clubs don't, you know, because open mic doesn't, it's not a money-making night.

01:20:33.000 No.

01:20:33.000 You know, and so a lot of clubs, like, they see it as an afterthought, but it's like...

01:20:36.000 It's stupid.

01:20:37.000 You have to nurture the scene.

01:20:39.000 You're doing it for the greater good of the art form.

01:20:42.000 The more people that do it, the better the people will be.

01:20:45.000 The better the people that are around you, the better you'll be.

01:20:48.000 It's good for everybody.

01:20:50.000 And if you're a comedy fan and you go in one day and you see some kid who's been doing comedy for two years...

01:20:57.000 It's kind of funny.

01:20:58.000 And then you come back six years later and they're fucking headlining.

01:21:02.000 Be a beast.

01:21:03.000 And you're like, wow, this is wild.

01:21:06.000 This is wild.

01:21:07.000 It's beautiful to see, man.

01:21:09.000 It's exciting.

01:21:10.000 It's an exciting time for stand-up.

01:21:11.000 It's my favorite place.

01:21:13.000 And, you know, what we're doing out here is the best that we can do right here.

01:21:16.000 It doesn't mean that it's better than anywhere else.

01:21:18.000 They're all great if you do it the right way.

01:21:20.000 You've got to do it the right way.

01:21:22.000 It's just another place where you can do it.

01:21:25.000 I don't think you have to like, there's a winner.

01:21:28.000 That's dumb.

01:21:29.000 But it does help that there's so many good comics here.

01:21:31.000 There's a lot of good comics here.

01:21:32.000 There's a lot of stage time here.

01:21:34.000 And there's decent money to be made.

01:21:38.000 Even if you're not a famous comic.

01:21:40.000 Because all the spots pay pretty well.

01:21:43.000 That's the good thing that we did out here.

01:21:45.000 We jacked that up.

01:21:46.000 Yeah, all that free shit.

01:21:47.000 If your show don't pay, it's not going to last here.

01:21:50.000 Yeah.

01:21:51.000 Because my attitude's always been the same.

01:21:53.000 It's not like I'm above doing a free show.

01:21:55.000 But if I find out you're making money and you're not paying the comics, then I'm not fucking with you.

01:22:00.000 Exactly.

01:22:01.000 Well, they used to have those shows in L.A. where the one person putting on the show...

01:22:05.000 Was making all the money.

01:22:07.000 They were making thousands of dollars and they'd give like $50 to this person.

01:22:10.000 They'd give a couple hundred bucks out out of thousands and thousands of dollars for a sold out show.

01:22:15.000 But that person wasn't even a good comic.

01:22:17.000 People were coming to see all the other people and the other people were just doing the show because it was convenient.

01:22:22.000 They were in town.

01:22:22.000 Yeah, I want to do a set.

01:22:23.000 And they just wanted to do a set just to work out.

01:22:26.000 And you think of the store as a place to just work out.

01:22:28.000 And you realize, oh, somebody's like massively profiting.

01:22:31.000 Making like 85% of the money.

01:22:33.000 Yeah.

01:22:34.000 It's kind of fucked up.

01:22:35.000 But it's, you know...

01:22:37.000 That doesn't have to be the case.

01:22:39.000 The way we're doing it is way better.

01:22:41.000 Where the comics feel appreciated, the reason why people are going there is for the comics.

01:22:45.000 So they make the money.

01:22:47.000 That's how it's supposed to be.

01:22:49.000 And it's also good for everybody else.

01:22:52.000 It's good.

01:22:53.000 It's good for the club.

01:22:54.000 The club's got to understand, like, what are you selling?

01:22:57.000 This is the argument that I had with the store when I got banned.

01:23:00.000 I was like, you have a box with a microphone in it.

01:23:02.000 If we don't go, you have nothing.

01:23:04.000 You're not selling the Comedy Store.

01:23:06.000 The Comedy Store is a great venue that has a lot of amazing history.

01:23:10.000 But it's filled with us.

01:23:12.000 We're the comedians.

01:23:13.000 So if a shithead like you is making decisions and supporting a fucking joke thief over the rest of the community, you know what the fuck is going on.

01:23:21.000 All you have is a box.

01:23:24.000 Most of the institutions in comedy work that way.

01:23:28.000 Where the institution gets most of the money.

01:23:31.000 But it's like...

01:23:33.000 But the problem is they get you when you're not a draw.

01:23:37.000 Right.

01:23:37.000 So then they can say, oh, well, they're not here because of you.

01:23:40.000 Right.

01:23:41.000 So you get used to getting underpaid and not asking more about the money and how you're compensated.

01:23:48.000 Yeah.

01:23:48.000 And before you know it, you just have, you know, when it's all said and done, you have all these memories and, you know, it's the prestige.

01:23:55.000 Well, the thing about the store was it was a great place to work on your act and then you'd make money going to other places.

01:24:01.000 Right.

01:24:01.000 So that's how I always approached it.

01:24:02.000 I always approached it as its home base.

01:24:04.000 I'm glad they make money because I want to support it.

01:24:07.000 And it's the best club that's ever existed.

01:24:09.000 I don't think they should make nothing.

01:24:13.000 When you would find out how much money was on one of those bringer shows, those showcase shows, you feel violated.

01:24:23.000 You feel like, you fucked me.

01:24:25.000 You know that that's not fair.

01:24:28.000 You give someone $50 and you're making $6,000?

01:24:30.000 That's crazy.

01:24:34.000 That's what happens when people are allowed to do shit like that.

01:24:38.000 Generally, the people that are doing it aren't artists.

01:24:40.000 It's just like a business person that's figured out this little loophole that the artists who are just not good at planning for shit are kind of scatterbrained and impulsive.

01:24:50.000 There's every kind of artist at every level.

01:24:54.000 Yeah, so the concept behind this is just that, well, let's just put all the power in the hands of the artists and just do it right, do it ethically, and create like a real sense of community.

01:25:05.000 There's people that don't like that.

01:25:07.000 Who?

01:25:09.000 I think people that benefit from Artists being...

01:25:12.000 Yeah, you mean people that don't own other clubs.

01:25:14.000 Yeah, people that don't benefit from artists being empowered, you know?

01:25:19.000 Well, it's not even a power thing.

01:25:21.000 It's like you need them too.

01:25:23.000 Like, I'm happy that they make money.

01:25:25.000 I want everybody to make money.

01:25:26.000 But the thing is, like, they always held it over us.

01:25:29.000 But you know what it is?

01:25:30.000 Making money gives you the ability to say no to other money.

01:25:34.000 Like, it's like...

01:25:35.000 Because what I found is people in show business, a lot of times, all their power is in the fact that you don't have anything.

01:25:43.000 So it's like, all I got to do is throw a little bit of money at you.

01:25:46.000 And you have to say yes, because you're living in L.A. You're trying to survive.

01:25:49.000 Your rent is $8,000 a month for an efficiency.

01:25:53.000 And you need money.

01:25:54.000 And so you're going to sign this shitty contract and I'm going to give you 10 grand and that's more money than you've ever had at once.

01:26:00.000 Right.

01:26:01.000 And I'm buying the rights to your idea and I'm going to turn around and make 10 million dollars off it.

01:26:07.000 But when you have security in your money, you can say no to shit like that.

01:26:13.000 Yeah.

01:26:14.000 Yeah.

01:26:14.000 Well, that sort of situation in Hollywood only really applies to big budget things now.

01:26:19.000 It's very hard to get people, if they know what's going on, to sign off on something like that now.

01:26:25.000 A big budget thing is different.

01:26:27.000 If it's a movie or something like that, then what are you going to do?

01:26:31.000 It's going to make me famous and give me steady work.

01:26:34.000 There's some desperate people in the show business.

01:26:38.000 You know what's wild is this story with The Flash.

01:26:41.000 Do you know the story with the movie The Flash?

01:26:43.000 I mean, I know Ezra Miller is like a controversial figure.

01:26:46.000 But to say it mildly.

01:26:48.000 Really?

01:26:49.000 To say it mildly.

01:26:50.000 Okay, hit me.

01:26:51.000 I mean, he must be so good in this fucking movie.

01:26:54.000 I haven't seen the movie, but I heard it's really good.

01:26:56.000 He kidnapped the person, right?

01:26:58.000 He's a freak, man.

01:27:00.000 Okay.

01:27:00.000 I mean, he's non-binary.

01:27:02.000 He says he's a they-them, which gives him a lot of leeway.

01:27:05.000 But with the stuff that he gets accused of...

01:27:07.000 It's like, what is he accused of, Jamie?

01:27:11.000 It's weird.

01:27:12.000 Because it's hard to imagine that they still release this movie with all these controversial charges against this guy.

01:27:19.000 And I understand that they spent some god-awful amount of money on the movie.

01:27:24.000 It was funny, too.

01:27:26.000 The Batgirl lady didn't do shit.

01:27:28.000 They just canceled her movie.

01:27:33.000 Yeah, but he got something with children.

01:27:36.000 Okay.

01:27:38.000 Vanity Fair's report followed an update from Rolling Stone which detailed how Vermont State Police were unable to find a mother and her three children who are allegedly living in unsafe conditions at Miller's Farm in the state.

01:27:52.000 Reportedly, the police attempt to serve the mother with an emergency care order that would take away the children from Miller's property.

01:27:57.000 The repeated attempt to contact the mother apparently is what resulted in the police charging Miller with felony burglary.

01:28:04.000 Vermont State Police also report this occurred after police found out that several bottles of alcohol were taken from a residence.

01:28:09.000 After looking at surveillance footage, they found probable cause to charge Miller, who was issued a citation to show up in Vermont Superior Court for arraignment in late September.

01:28:19.000 Imagine the flash steals your booze.

01:28:22.000 You see the flash.

01:28:23.000 It's breaking into your house and stealing your booze.

01:28:24.000 It was his house though, wasn't it?

01:28:25.000 I don't know.

01:28:26.000 Well, it says it's his property.

01:28:28.000 People were staying there.

01:28:28.000 It says it's taking from a residence.

01:28:30.000 Miller's property.

01:28:32.000 Well, the parents, the children were staying at Miller's property.

01:28:36.000 His farm.

01:28:37.000 His farm, right.

01:28:39.000 It says the repeated attempt, contact mother, apparently, resulted in police charging Miller with felony burglary.

01:28:44.000 This occurred after police found out that several surveillance footage, several bottles of alcohol were taken from a residence.

01:28:52.000 It doesn't say the same residence.

01:28:53.000 It says a residence, like someone's home.

01:28:55.000 So he was stolen from someone's house.

01:28:58.000 After looking at surveillance footage, they found the probable cause to charge Miller.

01:29:01.000 So it's not his.

01:29:02.000 He stole booze from someone's house.

01:29:04.000 So that's what I was saying, Jamie.

01:29:05.000 That doesn't seem that bad.

01:29:07.000 Yeah, but that's crazy.

01:29:08.000 Imagine The Flash is stealing booze.

01:29:10.000 Are you a fucking superhero?

01:29:11.000 You're stealing my booze?

01:29:12.000 Imagine somebody that's rich stealing anything from you.

01:29:16.000 Right.

01:29:17.000 What do those two things have to do with each other?

01:29:18.000 I don't know.

01:29:19.000 So the child, the mother and the children, who knows what that is?

01:29:24.000 Yeah, go ahead.

01:29:25.000 That could be anything.

01:29:28.000 You want glasses and ice?

01:29:30.000 Can we get glasses and ice for Mr. Simpson?

01:29:33.000 Yeah, but there was something else.

01:29:35.000 There was a protection order put against him.

01:29:40.000 There were unattended guns at the house.

01:29:43.000 A source alleged that one child picked up a stray bullet and put it in her mouth.

01:29:47.000 Oh, Jesus.

01:29:47.000 A social worker visited the home and told the children's father that they looked good, yet there was more work to do.

01:29:52.000 Yeah, but wasn't there something else, though?

01:29:54.000 That's what I'm wondering.

01:29:55.000 I've never heard...

01:29:55.000 There's more than one case.

01:29:57.000 Yeah, it sounded to me like people rented his house, and then some shit was happening at his house, and he's trying to get involved, but that does not seem like what was really happening.

01:30:04.000 It seems like there's something else.

01:30:05.000 You sound like an Ezra Miller apologist.

01:30:07.000 I've never heard of it.

01:30:08.000 What is that that you got right there?

01:30:10.000 This is Estancia.

01:30:14.000 Oh, that stuff's horrible.

01:30:15.000 Is it?

01:30:17.000 That's Megan Murphy stuff.

01:30:18.000 No.

01:30:19.000 No?

01:30:19.000 It's not?

01:30:20.000 Is that tequila?

01:30:21.000 Those are way different bottles.

01:30:22.000 Oh, okay.

01:30:23.000 I think.

01:30:24.000 Let's get him some ice and some glasses.

01:30:29.000 What is that?

01:30:34.000 Is that it?

01:30:35.000 Yeah, that's it.

01:30:37.000 Yeah, that stuff is turpentine Megan loves that doesn't make any sense.

01:30:42.000 What's that?

01:30:43.000 Death.

01:30:44.000 It tastes like turpentine I think it's nasty, but she likes it.

01:30:49.000 I don't know, some people just like really fucking strong alcohol.

01:30:53.000 Hey, we got ice.

01:30:54.000 What is this?

01:30:55.000 Two C? I don't know, man.

01:30:58.000 Grab some stuff.

01:30:58.000 Just grab whatever looks good.

01:31:00.000 Bruh, I don't even know.

01:31:01.000 I'm gonna taste this.

01:31:02.000 I'm gonna see it as bad as you say.

01:31:04.000 It's bad.

01:31:04.000 This, though...

01:31:05.000 Give that stuff a try first.

01:31:07.000 Yeah.

01:31:08.000 If you want, we can break out some smelling salts.

01:31:12.000 See what we got going on here.

01:31:14.000 It can't be that bad.

01:31:15.000 Oh, it's bad.

01:31:15.000 Take a sip of that.

01:31:17.000 It's tequila moonshine, basically.

01:31:19.000 Go ahead.

01:31:19.000 Hit it.

01:31:20.000 Oh, shit.

01:31:25.000 I told you.

01:31:27.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:31:28.000 Nasty.

01:31:29.000 What the fuck, Megan?

01:31:31.000 What the fuck?

01:31:32.000 What the fuck, Megan?

01:31:33.000 This shit tastes like...

01:31:35.000 She loves it!

01:31:36.000 It tastes like floor cleaner or some shit.

01:31:38.000 It's so nasty.

01:31:39.000 Yeah, yeah, I'm good on this.

01:31:40.000 Yeah.

01:31:41.000 I mean, who likes that?

01:31:43.000 Weirdos.

01:31:43.000 Let me get a swig of that.

01:31:44.000 Just so I... You're not alone.

01:31:48.000 You're not alone.

01:31:49.000 Oh, it's so gross, man.

01:31:51.000 It's foul.

01:31:52.000 Here we go.

01:31:53.000 Let's take a little bit.

01:32:00.000 It's worse than I remember.

01:32:03.000 Yeah, it's real bad.

01:32:04.000 It's foul.

01:32:05.000 Smelling salt so you can forget that?

01:32:07.000 Oh, yeah.

01:32:07.000 Bust out the smelling salts.

01:32:08.000 They're fresh.

01:32:09.000 Oh, yeah.

01:32:10.000 Oh, you really got smelling salts?

01:32:11.000 Of course you do.

01:32:12.000 Of course you do.

01:32:12.000 Why is that surprising at all?

01:32:13.000 Theo Vaughn is addictive.

01:32:15.000 Whoops.

01:32:16.000 Theo Vaughn.

01:32:16.000 Is this the same ones?

01:32:18.000 Oh, this is in the bag.

01:32:20.000 This is gonna be rough.

01:32:22.000 Are those for the legit joints?

01:32:25.000 They use it in fights?

01:32:26.000 No, they use it like power lifters use it before they attempt a big lift.

01:32:31.000 Really?

01:32:32.000 That's in a special package?

01:32:33.000 This is a different company.

01:32:35.000 This is not in a special package.

01:32:37.000 Oh, jeez.

01:32:38.000 This one's so bad, Jamie.

01:32:39.000 I know.

01:32:40.000 My eyes hurt.

01:32:42.000 My eyes hurt from opening the bag, dude.

01:32:44.000 I haven't even opened the bottle.

01:32:46.000 I don't know what this means.

01:32:49.000 Holy shit, dude.

01:32:50.000 Just smell this bag.

01:32:51.000 Just smell the bag.

01:32:53.000 Why are you doing this?

01:32:54.000 The bag's closed.

01:32:56.000 That's just the bag.

01:32:58.000 That's just the bag.

01:32:58.000 It's not even this.

01:32:59.000 He didn't give me no fucking...

01:33:00.000 He didn't go, take a little, tiny...

01:33:02.000 Take your time.

01:33:04.000 This is still sealed.

01:33:05.000 Oh, man.

01:33:06.000 The rest of this episode is going to turn to me smelling stuff.

01:33:09.000 Bro, this hurts from here.

01:33:10.000 Oh man, Joe.

01:33:12.000 No!

01:33:14.000 You went too close.

01:33:19.000 It can't be that bad.

01:33:20.000 It is.

01:33:24.000 Oh my god.

01:33:25.000 Oh my god, he went too close.

01:33:27.000 Oh my god.

01:33:28.000 We're going to have to take a break, I think.

01:33:30.000 No, no, no, we're good.

01:33:31.000 Brian's going to go.

01:33:32.000 It's still burning me.

01:33:33.000 Brian almost ate it.

01:33:35.000 Oh my god.

01:33:36.000 Oh my god.

01:33:38.000 This one is so much stronger, dude.

01:33:41.000 I know.

01:33:42.000 That's why I'm leaving these in the package.

01:33:44.000 It's so, so much stronger.

01:33:46.000 Oh, shit!

01:33:48.000 Oh, that's bad.

01:33:50.000 And it's so much stronger.

01:33:51.000 Oh, that's bad.

01:33:52.000 It's so bad.

01:33:54.000 Oh, Lord.

01:33:56.000 That is...

01:33:57.000 That's the old one times, like, a thousand.

01:34:01.000 Oh, my God.

01:34:02.000 Oh.

01:34:04.000 It hurts, dude, still.

01:34:06.000 It still hurts.

01:34:08.000 The inside of my nose got scorched.

01:34:12.000 I thought they had flavored ones.

01:34:14.000 What flavor?

01:34:16.000 I couldn't find it.

01:34:18.000 I think they might have stopped.

01:34:20.000 Folks at home, you can hear Brian Simpson's in the hallway moaning.

01:34:25.000 Oh, Jesus.

01:34:27.000 That was so...

01:34:28.000 One of the worst things I've ever done.

01:34:29.000 Ever.

01:34:30.000 Can you close the door, please?

01:34:31.000 It's still burning me.

01:34:33.000 And I did mine like 30 seconds before you.

01:34:35.000 Oh, fuck.

01:34:37.000 Pool water.

01:34:38.000 Oh, Jesus Christ.

01:34:39.000 It smells to me that I just remember pool water.

01:34:41.000 This is way worse than pool water.

01:34:42.000 It's just...

01:34:43.000 Sucking pool water.

01:34:44.000 It's the worst, man.

01:34:46.000 Yo, this shit is...

01:34:47.000 This one, Jamie, is so bad.

01:34:49.000 It's so much worse than the other ones.

01:34:51.000 Holy shit.

01:34:52.000 I treated it like it was the other ones.

01:34:54.000 I took a real snifferoo.

01:34:55.000 I got in there deep.

01:34:57.000 It was in the package package.

01:34:58.000 The package that came in the mail, it was smelling through that.

01:35:01.000 It's insane how strong it is.

01:35:03.000 Oh my god, dude.

01:35:04.000 That's insane.

01:35:06.000 How could that possibly help you?

01:35:07.000 Why is that necessary?

01:35:10.000 I was thinking, do this and go on stage, but I never did.

01:35:13.000 But imagine that one, doing that one.

01:35:14.000 You go on stage, people are like, what drugs are you on?

01:35:18.000 Smelling salts.

01:35:19.000 That was one of the worst things.

01:35:20.000 I don't know if I've ever regretted something so quick.

01:35:25.000 Where is it, by the way?

01:35:26.000 Where'd you put it?

01:35:26.000 It's right here.

01:35:27.000 It's right here.

01:35:28.000 Oh my god, dude.

01:35:29.000 That shit, it burned my whole shit, like all up in my side.

01:35:33.000 Is this supposed to be the same as the other ones we got?

01:35:35.000 There's only one he makes.

01:35:37.000 That's insane.

01:35:38.000 It's so inconsistent.

01:35:39.000 What the fuck is it for?

01:35:40.000 It's powerlifters.

01:35:42.000 They take a sniff of that shit and then lift weights.

01:35:44.000 No way.

01:35:45.000 Yeah.

01:35:48.000 It's horrible, Jamie.

01:35:49.000 Want to try it?

01:35:50.000 No, no.

01:35:51.000 Absolutely not.

01:35:52.000 My eyes are already, I'm like close enough.

01:35:54.000 Bro, my eyes were watering when I opened up the bag.

01:35:57.000 Just when I tore the top of the bag, my eyes started watering.

01:36:00.000 Oh, man.

01:36:01.000 That's insane.

01:36:03.000 Oh, my God, bro.

01:36:08.000 Bro, y'all don't even know what I was just going through.

01:36:12.000 Yeah, it's harsh.

01:36:13.000 Like, I don't know what the fuck was wrong with me.

01:36:16.000 That bag fucked me up.

01:36:18.000 And you were like, that's even stronger.

01:36:20.000 And I put it right here.

01:36:21.000 Yeah.

01:36:22.000 It's like, what the fuck?

01:36:24.000 So the whole time I was suffering, I was feeling like an idiot.

01:36:26.000 I was like, what the fuck?

01:36:27.000 Oh, I felt like an idiot too because I had done it before on the ones that were not as potent.

01:36:31.000 Oh, man.

01:36:32.000 That is the most potent one by far.

01:36:34.000 Easy.

01:36:35.000 It's so bad.

01:36:36.000 Get that shit away from me.

01:36:38.000 Redline.

01:36:38.000 That's worse?

01:36:39.000 It was just like the highest selling one on Amazon.

01:36:43.000 It says they use an advanced polymer to bring the strongest and longest lasting formulation yet.

01:36:49.000 Oh.

01:36:49.000 Maybe it lasts longer, because this one, after a while, it does die off.

01:36:53.000 Yeah, this is made out of some weird material.

01:36:56.000 We should probably store this in the garage.

01:36:58.000 Like, I think it's bothering me just sitting here.

01:37:00.000 Yeah, I don't give a fuck what that one smells like.

01:37:02.000 Sparing that over.

01:37:04.000 Oh, Jesus Christ.

01:37:06.000 No, sir.

01:37:07.000 Oof, you got me, these motherfuckers.

01:37:09.000 Do you smell it?

01:37:10.000 Do you smell that?

01:37:10.000 Like, when you're holding the bottle?

01:37:11.000 Do you smell it?

01:37:12.000 Oh, you're hiding it.

01:37:14.000 Can you bring a bottle of water?

01:37:17.000 There's water right there in that metal cup.

01:37:20.000 That's right.

01:37:22.000 Dude, what's wrong with us?

01:37:24.000 Terrible taste in alcohol.

01:37:25.000 That was so stupid!

01:37:26.000 So dumb.

01:37:28.000 Oh, man, Joe.

01:37:30.000 I can't wait to get Theo back in here.

01:37:33.000 Open up a freshie.

01:37:34.000 That's the thing.

01:37:35.000 You gotta open up that bag.

01:37:36.000 Yeah, it's...

01:37:37.000 Oh.

01:37:38.000 Yeah, it's still in the room.

01:37:40.000 It sure is.

01:37:40.000 Oh, my God.

01:37:43.000 But it's crazy because the ones that we had before, they were like one-tenth of that.

01:37:47.000 I threw my glasses.

01:37:49.000 Oh, yeah.

01:37:50.000 I'm worried we're going to throw the smell in salt.

01:37:52.000 Well, no, the thing is, I couldn't.

01:37:54.000 Oh, you think that happened?

01:37:55.000 I thought you tossed it.

01:37:55.000 Oh, my God.

01:37:56.000 Oh, really?

01:37:57.000 I couldn't see.

01:37:58.000 I didn't see that happen with you.

01:38:00.000 Oh, yeah.

01:38:01.000 Because my eyes were burning.

01:38:02.000 I had to close my eyes.

01:38:03.000 I had my eyes closed shut, and I heard you go, wah!

01:38:06.000 Yeah, oh, my God.

01:38:08.000 Oh, man, what was wrong with me?

01:38:09.000 Holy shit.

01:38:11.000 Holy shit.

01:38:11.000 God damn.

01:38:12.000 It still hurts.

01:38:14.000 The inside of my nose still hurts.

01:38:15.000 I know.

01:38:16.000 It's probably like 50 times worse than the last one.

01:38:19.000 And the worst shit is when you hurt yourself and you can only blame yourself.

01:38:24.000 Oh yeah.

01:38:25.000 No, you can blame me.

01:38:25.000 What did they figure out that makes it so fucking strong that nobody else has?

01:38:30.000 I don't know how they stumbled across that.

01:38:31.000 Man, that, you know, maybe this is the best advertisement for it.

01:38:34.000 That's the strongest shit I've ever smelled, ever.

01:38:36.000 Period.

01:38:37.000 But, Jamie, this is the same one as the other ones.

01:38:39.000 Yeah, 100%.

01:38:39.000 So it's like the batches are different.

01:38:41.000 It's just, it's like a weed edible, you know?

01:38:45.000 Sometimes you break it up and you put too much in the left one and the one on the right gets all the less.

01:38:49.000 Like, if they start mixing that shit with cocaine, people will quit cocaine overnight.

01:38:52.000 I 100% thought that I was going to see blood in this tissue when I just blew my nose.

01:38:57.000 It still hurts.

01:38:58.000 It still hurts all up in my head.

01:39:00.000 Yeah, my eyes hurt.

01:39:02.000 The thing is, I was breathing, but I felt like I wasn't breathing.

01:39:05.000 Yeah.

01:39:05.000 Oh, it was horrible.

01:39:06.000 Yeah, I thought it was going to never end.

01:39:09.000 The inside of my nose is scorched.

01:39:11.000 You're not supposed to go that close.

01:39:13.000 You guys went close, and you're supposed to go.

01:39:14.000 Where are you supposed to go?

01:39:15.000 Like six inches away, maybe?

01:39:17.000 Where'd I go?

01:39:17.000 Yeah, where was all that information fucking ten minutes ago?

01:39:19.000 I got up in there.

01:39:21.000 Now you weren't listening to me saying, don't go that deep.

01:39:23.000 It's like six inches right here.

01:39:25.000 Yeah.

01:39:26.000 Nah, bro.

01:39:27.000 Nah, bro.

01:39:27.000 Even then, though.

01:39:29.000 That sounds like cat to me.

01:39:31.000 That's like when they told us to stay six feet away for COVID. Right.

01:39:35.000 That just sounds like a number that somebody just threw out there.

01:39:38.000 Yeah, it actually says 12 inches away.

01:39:39.000 Yeah, okay.

01:39:40.000 That's more like it.

01:39:41.000 Because right here, right here, fuck me up.

01:39:43.000 We both got in there.

01:39:44.000 We got in there.

01:39:45.000 I was like an inch from my nose.

01:39:46.000 I did not do more than a few times per day.

01:39:49.000 Uh-oh, it's real.

01:39:50.000 I'm telling you, Joe, somebody's going to remix this episode, and they're going to constantly be playing, you going, just suck on it, and then us sniffing these fucking...

01:39:58.000 And it's going to turn into, they're going to put a beat to it.

01:40:02.000 One can only hope.

01:40:04.000 Oh, yeah, the fans are fucking crazy.

01:40:05.000 The internet's amazing.

01:40:06.000 The internet is so great.

01:40:08.000 Memes, to me, that's some of my favorite laughs of the day.

01:40:11.000 It's ridiculous memes that people say.

01:40:13.000 It really is...

01:40:14.000 A brand new kind of version of comedy.

01:40:17.000 And it's very super culturally specific.

01:40:22.000 Most of the best memes are of the time.

01:40:24.000 You couldn't show somebody a meme.

01:40:26.000 You know, you show somebody a meme in 10 years with no context and they just don't get it.

01:40:31.000 Right.

01:40:32.000 Yeah.

01:40:32.000 So it's like the new version of a street joke.

01:40:36.000 Right, right.

01:40:37.000 And some of them, they just get everywhere, like the dude with the big dick sitting on the side of the bed.

01:40:41.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:40:42.000 Because the pictures can be used for so many things.

01:40:45.000 Yes!

01:40:45.000 So many things.

01:40:47.000 It's crazy.

01:40:48.000 And there's some people out there that really be, you know, they really good at making a good meme.

01:40:52.000 Anytime someone gets fucked up, anytime something happens, someone falls down, someone does that meme of me with the microphone there.

01:40:59.000 Oh, yeah.

01:40:59.000 And they don't get paid for it.

01:41:01.000 Wherever they come from, somebody always takes credit and they don't get paid.

01:41:04.000 Right.

01:41:04.000 Well, there's all these pages that are just dedicated to memes, and they just find them, you know, on Reddit or wherever they get them from, on 4chan, and they just post them everywhere.

01:41:13.000 Oh, yeah.

01:41:15.000 It's like, it's crowdsourced comedy.

01:41:18.000 Yeah, and now everyone with a sense of humor has a folder dedicated to memes.

01:41:22.000 Yeah.

01:41:23.000 Some people are quick with them too, like when my friends send me them sometimes.

01:41:26.000 Like, how the fuck?

01:41:27.000 Did you have that?

01:41:28.000 Right.

01:41:28.000 Just sitting there, do you have them categorized?

01:41:30.000 It all picked up during the pandemic, right?

01:41:33.000 Don't you think?

01:41:34.000 Ming Ming?

01:41:35.000 Nah, Ming Ming was big before the pandemic.

01:41:36.000 But don't you think it got bigger during the pandemic?

01:41:39.000 No.

01:41:40.000 You know what I think happened is I think there were memes that were more universal.

01:41:44.000 So it felt like that.

01:41:45.000 Like we all shared more stuff than we normally, you know what I mean?

01:41:49.000 Like masks.

01:41:50.000 Yeah, like Tiger King type of deal.

01:41:52.000 If that wasn't for the pandemic, that would have been kind of popular, but everyone wouldn't have seen it.

01:41:57.000 Can you imagine if Trump pardoned him?

01:41:59.000 I thought he would've.

01:42:01.000 I wonder if it was on a list.

01:42:03.000 I thought he was going to, but I think he probably said some shit about Trump in the past.

01:42:06.000 Did he?

01:42:07.000 Or something.

01:42:07.000 Something.

01:42:08.000 Not wise.

01:42:09.000 Because it's wild that he wouldn't do it, because so many people wanted him to.

01:42:12.000 Yeah.

01:42:14.000 Is he in jail?

01:42:15.000 Yeah.

01:42:16.000 I thought he was dying of cancer.

01:42:18.000 Oh, this was posted yesterday.

01:42:22.000 Hmm.

01:42:22.000 So, he says, yeah, I don't know.

01:42:27.000 What is it?

01:42:28.000 He tagged Trump?

01:42:31.000 This can't be real.

01:42:33.000 What is it saying?

01:42:34.000 I think it is his account, because they messaged me on that.

01:42:37.000 It said, someone better start doing reform because they and their families are supporting me because you never keep your promises.

01:42:47.000 Okay.

01:42:48.000 I don't know what that means.

01:42:50.000 I'm not sure what that means, but...

01:42:52.000 That guy, I mean, what a weird cultural phenomenon, right?

01:42:56.000 Everyone's locked in their home, and then all of a sudden there's this wacky reality show about a dude who collects tigers, and everybody's telling you you have to see it.

01:43:04.000 Yeah, and they were right.

01:43:05.000 It was great, but they just caught lightning in a bottle.

01:43:08.000 They hit the perfect spot.

01:43:10.000 Yeah, they were like HBO by accident.

01:43:12.000 Yeah.

01:43:13.000 For once.

01:43:14.000 For one show.

01:43:15.000 Yeah, Tiger King was a hit.

01:43:17.000 I mean, they've had a couple hits, too, though.

01:43:19.000 Yeah, but that one was, like, everywhere.

01:43:21.000 He was trying for president.

01:43:22.000 He was trying to.

01:43:27.000 State sends back his paperwork because he's not on the presidential ballot in Colorado.

01:43:31.000 Colorado's like, no, son.

01:43:32.000 Fuck out of here.

01:43:34.000 Damn.

01:43:35.000 The smelling salts, man.

01:43:37.000 I'm just coming back to normal.

01:43:38.000 Yeah, I'm just...

01:43:39.000 It still burns a little bit.

01:43:41.000 Yeah, my right nostril's still a little lit up.

01:43:43.000 But boy, I'm breathing good.

01:43:44.000 Yeah, it cleaned you out.

01:43:45.000 Is that what that's for?

01:43:46.000 I think that's what that's for.

01:43:47.000 Well, I think it's just a central nervous stimulant.

01:43:50.000 The idea is that you get that jolt of it and your whole body's like, ah!

01:43:53.000 And then you can fucking rawr!

01:43:55.000 Yo, do that in the cold plunge.

01:43:57.000 Oh my god.

01:43:59.000 I don't know if people fainting, they used to break it out when you faint.

01:44:02.000 And then you put it up and you wake up.

01:44:04.000 But then people started doing other shit.

01:44:05.000 Of course.

01:44:06.000 But imagine waking up.

01:44:07.000 Now you got a concussion and you can't breathe.

01:44:09.000 What's the purpose of amyl nitrate?

01:44:15.000 Those were poppers.

01:44:17.000 And people would take amyl nitrate and they would pop it under their nose and sniff it.

01:44:21.000 And it would get really high.

01:44:22.000 I know it's a sex thing.

01:44:25.000 It's used to...

01:44:26.000 Vasodilator.

01:44:28.000 Vasodilator.

01:44:28.000 Vasodilator is a medicine to cause blood vessels in the body to dilate and involuntary smooth muscles to relax, lowering blood pressure and loosening up that booty hole.

01:44:40.000 Apparently that was a big thing in the gay community and contributed to...

01:44:47.000 I guess it really fucks you up.

01:44:50.000 I think amyl nitrate, I think it gives you brain damage.

01:44:54.000 Also a cyanide poisoning antidote.

01:44:56.000 Oh, wow.

01:44:58.000 Oh, so if you get cyanide poisoning, you crack one of those babies?

01:45:01.000 It's one of those things from the 20s and 30s.

01:45:02.000 I don't know if people get cyanide poisoning these days.

01:45:04.000 I remember there was always the fucking spy that had a fake tooth.

01:45:08.000 It's illegal to sell.

01:45:10.000 It's like a sex thing.

01:45:12.000 Oh, really?

01:45:13.000 Yeah, so it's VCR head cleaner is what they sell.

01:45:16.000 Oh, God.

01:45:17.000 That's how they sell it.

01:45:19.000 Oh, God.

01:45:20.000 So it's like if you go into a porn store or an adult store, it's the only thing in there that'll help that's a VCR product.

01:45:28.000 That's hilarious.

01:45:28.000 But it's definitely not poppers.

01:45:30.000 It's not for sniffing for sex.

01:45:32.000 Right, that's like bath salts.

01:45:34.000 It's the cleaning of VCR, which everyone has.

01:45:37.000 Oh yeah, bath salts.

01:45:38.000 Wait a minute, is that a sex thing?

01:45:40.000 Well, bath salts was a drug, like an amphetamine type drug, like a designer drug that they were selling that you could buy at like fucking 7-Eleven.

01:45:50.000 You'd buy at like a supermarket or like a convenience store, gas station store.

01:45:55.000 And these things, they would say, not for human consumption, bath salts.

01:45:59.000 And it was like an amphetamine and people were smoking it.

01:46:03.000 You don't remember that?

01:46:04.000 I remember bath salts being a thing, but I never was into it.

01:46:08.000 Well, it was in the news because some dude was on bath salts and he ate some guy's face.

01:46:13.000 Yeah, but that wasn't in them not being because of the bath salts.

01:46:16.000 Oh, he was fucking insane.

01:46:18.000 He was insane, right.

01:46:18.000 But the bath salts definitely didn't help.

01:46:22.000 I mean, if you're on meth and you're insane.

01:46:24.000 If you're already prone to some kind of delusional shit, it's just going to make it worse.

01:46:29.000 What were bath salts?

01:46:31.000 I think it was more than one different chemical because it's not regulated.

01:46:34.000 I'm making sure it wasn't this stuff.

01:46:36.000 But can you actually use bath salts for baths?

01:46:39.000 No.

01:46:39.000 Okay, so it's all bullshit.

01:46:40.000 No.

01:46:41.000 I mean, if you did, you'd probably die.

01:46:43.000 Synthetic.

01:46:43.000 Probably all that bath salts would get into your skin from the warm water.

01:46:47.000 All that meth.

01:46:50.000 You take a meth bath.

01:46:52.000 Yeah, it'll get in your skin.

01:46:54.000 You think it's just a meth bath?

01:46:57.000 Well, if you did it that way, if you did pour it into hot water, it would most likely get in your holes for sure.

01:47:04.000 It's a synthetic version of this drug.

01:47:07.000 Cat.

01:47:07.000 Oh, that's what the Somali pirates take.

01:47:10.000 Can you make that larger?

01:47:12.000 What does cat do?

01:47:13.000 Does it just make you want to It's like an amphetamine.

01:47:15.000 Cathinone is a monoamine alkaloid found in the shrub cathos edulis and is chemically similar to ephedrine.

01:47:23.000 Is it ephedrine?

01:47:24.000 Ephedrine.

01:47:47.000 I wonder how many people bought it and thought it was actual bath salts and poured it in the bath.

01:48:00.000 I bet they did.

01:48:01.000 Because if it says bath salts, some really fucking stupid person doesn't know.

01:48:06.000 They're breaking into buildings to get that shit back in 2011. The bath salts?

01:48:10.000 Yeah.

01:48:11.000 Yeah, that's why if you mention that a drug is killing people.

01:48:15.000 People want to buy it.

01:48:16.000 Yeah, people want it.

01:48:17.000 K2 was big at the same time, remember that?

01:48:19.000 What was K2? An herb-like substance that people smoked instead of weed that they sprayed shit on.

01:48:27.000 Remember that?

01:48:28.000 Me neither.

01:48:28.000 And then they kept changing what they were spraying on every so often because it would get outlawed.

01:48:33.000 Do you remember this?

01:48:35.000 Not much.

01:48:36.000 Then also the salvia.

01:48:39.000 Then people were like, oh, is it like this salvia shit that we're smoking?

01:48:43.000 Salvia is strong.

01:48:43.000 It's not like that.

01:48:44.000 That is not the same thing.

01:48:46.000 Salvia is strong.

01:48:47.000 I've done salvia once, and I... Salvia is real.

01:48:52.000 That is a real fucking drug.

01:48:54.000 Spice, they also called it.

01:48:56.000 Salvia might be the strongest, in terms of its effect, maybe the strongest drug I've ever taken.

01:49:01.000 Do you know that salvia is either in the family of sage, or what do you want?

01:49:06.000 Tissues.

01:49:07.000 It's either in the sage family, or it is sage.

01:49:12.000 Like, salvia divinorum, I think is, which is interesting, because, you know, sage, we've always thought of, like, wise old sage, like some ancient wisdom, and the fact that it's actually a psychedelic.

01:49:24.000 Is that the same thing?

01:49:25.000 Like, if you buy sage, is that salvia?

01:49:27.000 No.

01:49:28.000 No, no, no.

01:49:28.000 Is it a version of it?

01:49:29.000 It's known as, it's just called diviner sage or seer sage.

01:49:33.000 I don't, I don't, I'm not sure.

01:49:34.000 It's not an actual sage?

01:49:35.000 I mean, it's a plant, it's a shrub, I don't know.

01:49:37.000 Okay.

01:49:38.000 Kind of like a generic term.

01:49:38.000 Maybe it's like a, oh, okay.

01:49:42.000 But that stuff, you used to be able to buy it everywhere.

01:49:44.000 I couldn't believe it.

01:49:45.000 It's so powerful.

01:49:47.000 Dude, so the first time I did it, I remember, like, I thought that my body had shattered into, like, little millions of mini-me's, and I was, like, panicking trying to keep myself together in one...

01:50:01.000 That's what sage is called, salvia.

01:50:03.000 Oh, so it's related somehow.

01:50:05.000 It says salvia...

01:50:07.000 So salvia divinorum is the salvia that is...

01:50:11.000 Yeah, okay.

01:50:13.000 And so that's a different kind of salvia that's sage?

01:50:16.000 Yeah, that must be like salvia has got to be some sort of...

01:50:19.000 It's the genus, so that's like a least...

01:50:21.000 So somehow or another...

01:50:23.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:50:23.000 Okay.

01:50:24.000 Man, you know that people use that drug to like try to be shaman.

01:50:29.000 They're like, yeah, I took some salve.

01:50:30.000 This is what I saw.

01:50:31.000 That's your future.

01:50:32.000 Oh, God.

01:50:33.000 Right, because you will see some crazy shit.

01:50:36.000 There was a girl with me doing it the first time I did it, and she wanted to do hers in the bathtub filled with pillows.

01:50:42.000 She's like, oh, it'd be so cool, whatever.

01:50:44.000 They put her in there, and she took the hit, and we closed the door, and she screamed for like 30 seconds.

01:50:50.000 She thought she was falling in a bottomless pit.

01:50:53.000 See, the thing about salvia is this is why salvia is so powerful, because it's the only drug I've ever taken where it is impossible for you to realize that you're on drugs.

01:51:06.000 It only lasts for 30 seconds or so, but you think that shit is happening.

01:51:12.000 There's no doubt in your mind, there's no point where you can stop and be like, it's okay, I'm on salvia.

01:51:16.000 If you do too many mushrooms, you're like, I'm just real high.

01:51:20.000 No, on salvia, you're like, this is happening.

01:51:23.000 I'm literally falling into the abyss.

01:51:25.000 Somebody kicked me into the pit from 300. Oh my god.

01:51:29.000 Did you ever see the video of Ari where he took Salvia on Red Band's show?

01:51:35.000 He took Salvia on Red Band's show and said he lived another life for months.

01:51:39.000 He said he had friends, he went to work, he had relationships, all this different shit, and then he woke up.

01:51:49.000 He was gone, he said, for months.

01:51:52.000 And it was like 10 minutes.

01:51:54.000 So he just tripped balls for 10 minutes.

01:51:56.000 I encourage everyone to watch it.

01:51:58.000 He was taking bong rips and he didn't take the first one good enough so he took another hit and then this is the start of a 5 minute video where he just starts slipping away.

01:52:08.000 Yeah, he just went into another dimension, lived a different life.

01:52:11.000 That's when he starts coming back is where things start getting real different.

01:52:14.000 That's what freaks me out.

01:52:15.000 Like, what if that's really what's going on?

01:52:17.000 What if there's, like, multiple Brian Simpsons living in multiple realms all over the world right now?

01:52:23.000 And that's what dreaming is?

01:52:24.000 All over the universe.

01:52:26.000 It's you just connecting to your different bodies.

01:52:29.000 Connecting to your consciousness to different portals.

01:52:32.000 Yeah, well, I think there's a lot to that belief that, like, The fact that we are all separate beings is an illusion.

01:52:38.000 You're just a little piece that's living a little piece, but you're connected to everything.

01:52:43.000 Do you think that there's a purpose to this struggle then?

01:52:47.000 If we're all connected in some ways, what is everyone struggling?

01:52:54.000 What is that facilitating?

01:52:55.000 Like what's that creating that's necessary?

01:52:57.000 Like why is that happening?

01:52:59.000 What's the overall purpose of that if we're all connected?

01:53:03.000 I don't think there is a purpose.

01:53:04.000 No?

01:53:05.000 No.

01:53:05.000 But it's doing something.

01:53:06.000 The need for purpose is a human affliction.

01:53:10.000 The need for things to mean something, you know?

01:53:13.000 Right.

01:53:14.000 It's like when you see a When you see a shark eat a, or you see a killer whale eat a seal, you don't go, what does it mean?

01:53:23.000 And the whale's definitely not thinking that.

01:53:26.000 It's like they're just being.

01:53:28.000 I don't think there's a purpose.

01:53:29.000 I think we just are.

01:53:31.000 The purpose is to experience.

01:53:33.000 Right, but the thing that's happening with human beings with this struggle and this, like, conquering resources and all the different...

01:53:41.000 One of the things they're doing is they're constantly creating new and better things.

01:53:46.000 And it seems like an overall purpose of the human race.

01:53:50.000 I just wonder if somehow or another that competition is what facilitates this increase in technology and innovation.

01:53:57.000 Part of it is because of the competition.

01:53:59.000 Part of it is because of the fact that we don't get along.

01:54:02.000 There's this struggle that creates movement.

01:54:05.000 Well human beings, we need competition to survive.

01:54:10.000 Yeah.

01:54:11.000 If you were ever in charge of a big group of people, the best thing to do is to break them into two teams and keep score.

01:54:22.000 I think it's something in human nature.

01:54:25.000 We need an enemy for us to unite.

01:54:27.000 That's why America was never more together than the month after 9-11.

01:54:32.000 Yeah, for sure.

01:54:32.000 Right?

01:54:33.000 Because it's like, oh, now there's a them.

01:54:34.000 And we all feel justified because we don't know better.

01:54:37.000 Remember the American flags in everybody's car?

01:54:39.000 Yeah.

01:54:40.000 It's crazy.

01:54:41.000 You have people listening to country music they never have.

01:54:43.000 We'll put a boot in your ear.

01:54:46.000 Right?

01:54:47.000 People got very excited about it.

01:54:48.000 So it's like, I think that's just how people are built up.

01:54:50.000 They did that to us in the military.

01:54:52.000 You have, you know, it's like, well, obviously we're all the same unit.

01:54:57.000 We're all the same big unit with the same mission.

01:54:59.000 But, you know, it's your company versus my company.

01:55:01.000 It's your platoon versus my platoon.

01:55:03.000 It's your squad versus my squad within the platoon.

01:55:05.000 And it's like the competition, it pushes people.

01:55:08.000 Mm-hmm.

01:55:08.000 Yeah, for sure.

01:55:09.000 Everybody wants to win.

01:55:11.000 Winning feels great.

01:55:12.000 Yeah.

01:55:12.000 Triumph.

01:55:13.000 Yeah.

01:55:13.000 That's the best shit ever.

01:55:14.000 When you watch another person triumph, you're like, you feel it.

01:55:18.000 Like when Izzy beat Perea, we felt that shit.

01:55:22.000 We were in the mothership green room.

01:55:24.000 I think you were calling the fights.

01:55:25.000 Yeah.

01:55:26.000 But man, that moment, we lost our shit in there, man.

01:55:31.000 And we were all looking at a laptop screen and everybody was like, ah!

01:55:35.000 And then the speech he gave afterwards, everything was just so perfect, and you felt that.

01:55:40.000 That's as good as entertainment ever gets.

01:55:43.000 Yeah, he's like, I just wish you could have this feeling.

01:55:47.000 I was like, oh, I know that feeling.

01:55:49.000 But at his level, that's got to be insane.

01:55:53.000 The best of the world, redemption, overcoming the demon, revenge.

01:55:57.000 Revenge, flatlining the demon.

01:56:00.000 All the worst things.

01:56:01.000 All the most...

01:56:03.000 He triumphed over like three things in that one moment.

01:56:05.000 And he triumphed over the guy stylistically, which is the most dangerous opponent for him.

01:56:11.000 And here's the other thing.

01:56:12.000 What I love so much about that moment...

01:56:15.000 This is what I love about Izzy.

01:56:17.000 He knows how to be an entertainer.

01:56:22.000 A lot of the fighters don't realize that.

01:56:23.000 You have to be...

01:56:26.000 The greatest part was the arrows, when he shot the arrows into his body.

01:56:30.000 What was so beautiful about that moment to me is he won in the same position that he lost the last time.

01:56:37.000 The last time he got in that position where he was getting wailed on up against the fence, he lost.

01:56:42.000 And then he got put back right in that same position and had a fucking plan for it.

01:56:46.000 Yeah.

01:56:47.000 It was perfect.

01:56:48.000 Did you see the videos of him drilling that?

01:56:50.000 Oh, no.

01:56:51.000 He drilled that.

01:56:52.000 He drilled that over and over again.

01:56:53.000 Back to the ropes, right hand.

01:56:54.000 Back to the ropes, right hand.

01:56:56.000 Oh, wow.

01:56:57.000 Yeah, there's tons of video of him with his back to a wall in training throwing that right hand.

01:57:02.000 Of course.

01:57:03.000 He went over the videos.

01:57:05.000 He saw the hole.

01:57:06.000 He went over the fights.

01:57:08.000 He saw the style.

01:57:09.000 The style is so different.

01:57:11.000 Look at this.

01:57:14.000 So they planned this.

01:57:16.000 And look how the guy's fighting.

01:57:18.000 He's fighting like Pajero.

01:57:23.000 Literally the same right hand off the cage.

01:57:27.000 Same exact right hand.

01:57:28.000 Did it perfect.

01:57:29.000 But that's also the same right hand that he landed at the end of the first round.

01:57:32.000 So the end of the first round, in the first MMA fight, he had Paeda in real trouble.

01:57:37.000 I remember that.

01:57:38.000 He would have had him right there.

01:57:40.000 It's basically he had him in the same trouble he had him with the first right hand where he knocked him out in the second fight.

01:57:45.000 Yeah.

01:57:46.000 Because it was the second shot that put him away.

01:57:47.000 The first shot rocks him, the second shot puts him away, and then the hammer fits him.

01:57:50.000 And they actually have a lot of respect for each other.

01:57:53.000 Oh, yeah.

01:57:54.000 But the thing is, I always feel bad for the foreign fighters.

01:58:00.000 Or I'll say this.

01:58:01.000 We're fighters where English is not their first language when it comes to the shit-talking game.

01:58:05.000 Because it's so cultural, and if you're not immersed enough in American culture, that trash talk...

01:58:14.000 Because Paheo's probably saying some shit where, like, if you speak Portuguese, you're like, Paheo talking this shit.

01:58:19.000 But in English, it doesn't translate.

01:58:21.000 You know, like, it's not the same thing.

01:58:24.000 He's like, oh, a man with two horses has more...

01:58:27.000 It's like, that's not coming across.

01:58:30.000 You know what I mean?

01:58:31.000 In Brazil, like, he talking that shit!

01:58:33.000 But over here, it's like, you can't talk shit with Izzy in English because you can't keep up.

01:58:38.000 No.

01:58:38.000 Yeah, he has to get by just on his talent.

01:58:42.000 I mean, his draw is just his destruction ability.

01:58:46.000 Oh, he is talented.

01:58:47.000 Oh, he's so talented.

01:58:47.000 He's moving up, right?

01:58:49.000 I believe so.

01:58:50.000 It's interesting.

01:58:51.000 Anderson Silva said he thought it was a mistake.

01:58:53.000 Moving up?

01:58:53.000 Yeah.

01:58:54.000 I didn't read the article.

01:58:55.000 I just read the headline.

01:58:56.000 It said Anderson Silva thought it was a mistake for him to move up to 205, which is interesting because I don't know if that's necessarily true.

01:59:03.000 I think he's going to dominate.

01:59:05.000 Well, the problem is wrestlers.

01:59:06.000 The problem is wrestlers.

01:59:07.000 Because Izzy, you know, had him in some real bad positions in that first fight.

01:59:12.000 Anderson Silva, not a fan of Pajeda's move to 205. He wanted Pajeda to win back the middleweight title before moving to light heavyweight.

01:59:19.000 I think that cut is too much.

01:59:22.000 I think that cut is real bad for him.

01:59:23.000 It's a huge man.

01:59:24.000 It's so bad for you.

01:59:25.000 And I think he's 35 now.

01:59:28.000 At a certain age, your body just does not want to do that anymore.

01:59:32.000 You're killing yourself one day before a cage fight.

01:59:36.000 I was over getting punched in the face in my 20s.

01:59:39.000 The last time I got punched in the face, I was like, I don't like that.

01:59:41.000 I'm not going to do it on purpose.

01:59:43.000 Especially getting punched in the face by that guy or either one of those guys.

01:59:46.000 But you know what?

01:59:46.000 He's facing Jan Bohovic, which is a fucking wild fight.

01:59:50.000 That's going to be a problem.

01:59:51.000 And Jan Bohovic is a very good grappler, too.

01:59:53.000 So, I mean, he dominated Izzy on the ground.

01:59:55.000 And you know what, too?

01:59:56.000 Jan is very good at game planning.

01:59:58.000 Oh, yeah.

01:59:59.000 You know?

02:00:00.000 He's also got tremendous power.

02:00:03.000 Fucking tremendous power.

02:00:05.000 But he doesn't always show up.

02:00:07.000 Well, I think, you know, if you look at the Glover to share a fight, that's a fight where he, you know, you could say he didn't show up, but I don't think that's the case.

02:00:15.000 I think that Glover's just that good.

02:00:18.000 Yeah?

02:00:18.000 Yeah, I mean, especially that was like Glover's kind of last swan song.

02:00:22.000 He won the title.

02:00:23.000 Well, he just didn't...

02:00:24.000 Okay, maybe he didn't show up is not fair.

02:00:26.000 Jan, I would never say that to you in person.

02:00:29.000 I would say he didn't seem as locked in as he did when he fought Isis.

02:00:34.000 I think, I genuinely think that that's just how good Glover is.

02:00:39.000 Oh, wow, okay.

02:00:39.000 Yeah, I think Glover's a beat.

02:00:40.000 He's just in his 40s, but he's still a fucking animal, man.

02:00:45.000 And in that fight, when he won the title, he was stellar.

02:00:48.000 I mean, if you watch the performance, you watch how he catches Jan with a left hand, how he takes him down, how he takes his back, I mean...

02:00:55.000 You can't really put it against Yon.

02:00:57.000 I think he got clipped.

02:00:58.000 Do you think he's going to be done these times soon?

02:01:00.000 Glover or Yon?

02:01:01.000 Glover.

02:01:01.000 Yeah, I think Glover's done.

02:01:03.000 Yeah, Glover retired after Jamal Hill boxed him up.

02:01:06.000 Jamal Hill showed him, I think, that at the top of the light heavyweight division now, these young guys, especially a talented striker like Jamal, it's just too much.

02:01:15.000 Fighting more than any other sport, the UFC moves the fastest in terms of the next generation adopting...

02:01:24.000 Yeah, because I seriously believe it's true of fighting, comedy, whatever.

02:01:28.000 I think the current generation's Amazing becomes the next generation's basics, right?

02:01:37.000 And then they build, and then that becomes their basics, and so the amazing shit they do is even more amazing.

02:01:42.000 It's like basketball, right?

02:01:44.000 Where it's like, I remember seeing Michael Jordan, when he went up on one side of the basket, brought it back down, and came back, and I had never seen anybody do that before.

02:01:52.000 It was amazing.

02:01:53.000 And now, you can't even be in the NBA if you can't do that.

02:01:55.000 If you're a point guard in the NBA, you have to be able to do that.

02:01:58.000 It's the basics, you know what I mean?

02:01:59.000 You know what Killer Mike showed us yesterday?

02:02:02.000 What?

02:02:03.000 Michael Jordan's brother.

02:02:05.000 You know, Michael Jordan had a brother who was a bad motherfucker.

02:02:08.000 He said he was better than him.

02:02:09.000 Well, a lot of Michael's moves you see his brother do.

02:02:12.000 Fadeaway jump shots.

02:02:14.000 Where's his brother?

02:02:14.000 His brother's smaller than him.

02:02:15.000 Oh, his brother's just smaller than him.

02:02:16.000 Yeah.

02:02:17.000 But his brother's a killer player.

02:02:20.000 I don't know whatever happened with him if he played professionally.

02:02:23.000 I don't know what happened, but the dude was fucking good.

02:02:28.000 But the other thing we were saying yesterday, imagine having that brother as a sparring partner.

02:02:33.000 He's only 5'8".

02:02:34.000 He's only 5'8".

02:02:35.000 Wow.

02:02:35.000 But also imagine him not being famous too in some way.

02:02:38.000 I know.

02:02:39.000 Yeah.

02:02:40.000 It's like, for me to not know who he was until just now.

02:02:44.000 Or yesterday for me, yeah.

02:02:46.000 That seems kind of crazy.

02:02:48.000 Maybe he should have the Children's Jordans or something like that.

02:02:52.000 You know what I mean?

02:02:54.000 You know what I'm saying?

02:02:55.000 You think you would slide in something?

02:02:56.000 Right.

02:02:57.000 Some kind of way to make a...

02:02:58.000 Yeah, I don't know.

02:02:59.000 Some people just want everybody to do it for themselves.

02:03:02.000 No, but I think it's a smart thing, man.

02:03:05.000 A lot of people don't realize, because you have the power, you can make someone famous.

02:03:10.000 You know, I've seen you do it to several people, but some people don't realize that, like, some people that think they want that don't realize what actually comes with it.

02:03:18.000 Yeah, they don't know what it is.

02:03:20.000 Right, so it's like, you know, maybe he just protected him from that.

02:03:23.000 It was like, you don't need to be famous, I'll take care of you, but you don't want that.

02:03:26.000 I doubt it.

02:03:27.000 Michael Jordan loves being famous.

02:03:29.000 He took care of his brother.

02:03:29.000 He's got a pretty good job.

02:03:31.000 He gave him a job with the team he owned.

02:03:32.000 He played professional basketball, but he's not in the NBA. There you go.

02:03:35.000 We just don't know who he is.

02:03:36.000 He's not famous.

02:03:37.000 Working for the Bobcats.

02:03:41.000 Maybe he enjoys it.

02:03:41.000 Maybe he's a more low-key dude.

02:03:44.000 Some people don't want that pressure.

02:03:45.000 You only live a certain amount of time in this world.

02:03:48.000 How much pressure do you really want?

02:03:49.000 The thing, too, is you don't want to be the...

02:03:52.000 You don't want to be the famous person with a job.

02:03:54.000 To handle being famous, you have to have enough money to protect yourself from the negative side of it.

02:04:01.000 Yes.

02:04:01.000 And you can't just get...

02:04:03.000 Well, that's why famous reality stars are fucked.

02:04:05.000 Right.

02:04:06.000 They don't have any money.

02:04:07.000 Right.

02:04:07.000 You're not rich enough to deal with being famous.

02:04:09.000 Because you gotta...

02:04:11.000 You'll lose your mind.

02:04:12.000 Yeah.

02:04:13.000 And then sometimes they're famous for a little while, and then they're not on TV anymore, and then they have regular jobs.

02:04:19.000 I remember there was a couple of those guys from like the real world where, you know, they were infamous on the real world and then they're just out there in the wild with no money.

02:04:27.000 Right.

02:04:28.000 Famous.

02:04:29.000 You remember the rude gay guy from season four?

02:04:31.000 Yeah, he just delivered, he just dropped off my package.

02:04:34.000 Yeah.

02:04:34.000 Yeah, yeah, I get it.

02:04:36.000 But, you know, there's nothing wrong with that.

02:04:38.000 Working a nine-to-five is an honorable, respectable fucking thing.

02:04:41.000 For sure.

02:04:41.000 But it's like...

02:04:45.000 I feel sorry for the generation of young folks that want to be known, but they don't care what they're known for.

02:04:52.000 Well, it's a goal, right?

02:04:54.000 And it's very difficult to get.

02:04:55.000 And it's also, you're saying, games.

02:04:57.000 People want to win.

02:04:59.000 If your friend has 100,000 Instagram followers, and you have 120,000, and you guys are battling it out, To see who's a bigger influencer.

02:05:09.000 And you're doing stunts and shit at the mall and pranks.

02:05:13.000 You know how Spotify will pay per listen, per play, and YouTube will pay per views, right?

02:05:22.000 Well, TikTok doesn't do that.

02:05:24.000 TikTok has a pool of money That only goes to the top 500 people or something like that.

02:05:30.000 I don't know what the exact number is.

02:05:31.000 So it's just a fixed amount of money that only goes to the top people.

02:05:35.000 And the top 10, number one gets paid the most, number two gets paid the second most, and so on and so forth.

02:05:41.000 So they're literally competing.

02:05:43.000 And there's people on there that have lost their minds because they went from number one to number two.

02:05:51.000 You know?

02:05:52.000 Wow.

02:05:53.000 When you start ranking people, that was the downfall of MySpace.

02:05:58.000 MySpace was just...

02:05:59.000 People might not remember.

02:06:02.000 The big change in social media was when Facebook started showing you stuff from people that you didn't know.

02:06:13.000 Remember at first, MySpace and Facebook was, it was just your friends, and if I wanted to know something about what was going on with you, I had to go to your page and look at what you posted on your page.

02:06:23.000 Then they started just showing you things from your friends' pages, so you didn't have to do that.

02:06:28.000 Then they started showing you stuff from other people.

02:06:32.000 Instagram, Vine, all this.

02:06:33.000 They were just showing you random stuff.

02:06:35.000 That's when the algorithm was born.

02:06:36.000 They were like, well, what do we show them?

02:06:38.000 Well, now we see this is what he looks at.

02:06:39.000 They start showing you stuff from strangers, and that's what changed everything.

02:06:42.000 Now you can be famous.

02:06:44.000 You make one little funny little thing, and you can be known.

02:06:47.000 How about that one dude that just has facial reactions to things?

02:06:50.000 Oh, yeah.

02:06:51.000 I forget his name.

02:06:52.000 KB? Yeah.

02:06:53.000 KB-12 or something like that?

02:06:54.000 That guy's...

02:06:55.000 Huge.

02:06:56.000 Huge.

02:06:56.000 And it's good.

02:06:57.000 It's funny.

02:06:58.000 Yeah, it's good.

02:06:59.000 It's entertaining.

02:06:59.000 It's like new age miming.

02:07:01.000 It's like he's doing exactly, he's thinking what we're thinking.

02:07:03.000 He's like.

02:07:04.000 Yeah.

02:07:05.000 And the fact that it's perfectly, like it's a perfect medium for it.

02:07:10.000 Those little short TikTok videos, little short reels.

02:07:13.000 Yeah, a lot of people got rich during the pandemic off of being entertaining.

02:07:18.000 But that's also like, just where we're talking memes is a different kind of comedy.

02:07:22.000 This is a different kind of entertaining.

02:07:23.000 Some people are good at it.

02:07:25.000 Some people are mad about it.

02:07:26.000 Who's mad?

02:07:28.000 You get a phone call?

02:07:29.000 I don't need that shit.

02:07:30.000 I don't even know who that is.

02:07:32.000 You don't have your shit sent to go to voicemail if you don't know who they are?

02:07:35.000 No.

02:07:35.000 Shit, I should do that, huh?

02:07:36.000 Yeah, it's fucked up.

02:07:37.000 No, but I thought I had my shit on Do Not Disturb.

02:07:39.000 Yeah, you go to my voicemail, guess what?

02:07:41.000 It's not even set up.

02:07:42.000 Why did it ring, though?

02:07:44.000 Why?

02:07:45.000 I don't know.

02:07:46.000 It's on Do Not Disturb, so they must have called multiple times.

02:07:50.000 It's probably some scammer trying to tell you about a fortune that you're missing out on.

02:07:54.000 All the time.

02:07:55.000 Nobody calls me.

02:07:56.000 Most of my phone calls, you know, my mom is the only person that calls me.

02:08:00.000 I like calling people when I'm in the car.

02:08:02.000 It's funny.

02:08:03.000 It depends on their age.

02:08:04.000 People under 35 don't like phone calls.

02:08:06.000 Really?

02:08:07.000 Fuck no.

02:08:09.000 Fuck no.

02:08:09.000 But yet they FaceTime each other all the time.

02:08:11.000 Right.

02:08:12.000 To them that's different.

02:08:13.000 But that's also the next level of intimacy.

02:08:16.000 Right.

02:08:16.000 If I could FaceTime you.

02:08:18.000 Yeah.

02:08:18.000 We don't know each other like that.

02:08:20.000 I'm going to FaceTime you.

02:08:21.000 Yeah.

02:08:21.000 Yeah, because that...

02:08:23.000 You know what it is?

02:08:24.000 When you FaceTime...

02:08:26.000 Tom and I talked about this on his podcast.

02:08:28.000 But it's like...

02:08:30.000 An unsolicited FaceTime?

02:08:34.000 When is it appropriate who can do it?

02:08:36.000 Right.

02:08:36.000 And we didn't solve it on the pod, but we came up with the solution.

02:08:39.000 The answer is...

02:08:41.000 You have to have seen my dick or interacted with my dick.

02:08:46.000 For you to just FaceTime me unsolicited, that covers wife, kids, medical professionals.

02:08:52.000 That's the only people that should be best friends.

02:08:56.000 That should be the only people contacting me, FaceTime, without warning me first.

02:09:02.000 Yeah, if it's someone that's a casual acquaintance and they FaceTime, unless they have a good friend of yours with you.

02:09:08.000 Yeah, because if you FaceTime me, that means I can't do anything else while I'm talking to you.

02:09:12.000 Right.

02:09:13.000 You know, if I'm just talking to you audio, I can be still doing other stuff.

02:09:16.000 But FaceTime is a commitment.

02:09:18.000 It's like, okay, I'm taking your time and, you know, you can't multitask.

02:09:22.000 Yeah.

02:09:22.000 So what is this about?

02:09:23.000 I just wanted to see your face.

02:09:25.000 That's not good enough.

02:09:26.000 Only FaceTime me if it's something for me to see.

02:09:28.000 We don't need to be looking at each other to talk to each other.

02:09:30.000 Yeah, and FaceTime, they can drag on, too.

02:09:32.000 And you're holding that thing up in front of me, like, okay.

02:09:35.000 I gotta go.

02:09:36.000 I'm tired of doing this.

02:09:37.000 Man, I stopped trying to think of clever little lies.

02:09:40.000 I was like, hey, man, I'm gonna go ahead and get up off of here.

02:09:42.000 How do you FaceTime on an Android?

02:09:44.000 What do you mean?

02:09:45.000 When someone FaceTimes you, do you panic?

02:09:47.000 No, no, no.

02:09:48.000 So if I get a FaceTime from an Apple thing, I can just click a link and FaceTime them.

02:09:52.000 But does it look shitty?

02:09:53.000 But Google has Google Meet and then there's Discord.

02:09:57.000 I mean, not Discord.

02:09:58.000 What was the shit that got popular during the pandemic?

02:10:02.000 Zoom.

02:10:03.000 But usually Google has Google Meet.

02:10:06.000 And if not, I get a link and I just go anyway.

02:10:10.000 I don't think I can do it the other way around.

02:10:11.000 I don't think I can send you a Google Meet link.

02:10:13.000 Really?

02:10:13.000 I don't think so.

02:10:15.000 That seems like silly.

02:10:16.000 That's why I figured out thumbs up or liking the text messages on both of us now.

02:10:21.000 Yeah?

02:10:21.000 Finally thumbs up a green message.

02:10:23.000 Well, it's just Apple.

02:10:24.000 It's just Apple holding that walled garden, right?

02:10:26.000 They won't allow you to send iMessages on any other device.

02:10:30.000 No.

02:10:31.000 Then you would just get a Samsung phone and send iMessages to your Apple friends.

02:10:35.000 Alright, I'm gonna try to FaceTime you from here.

02:10:39.000 Okay.

02:10:40.000 Don't call it FaceTime, though, because it's a bullshit Google thing.

02:10:43.000 Stop lying to yourself.

02:10:44.000 Alright, I think this is it, right?

02:10:47.000 Okay, good.

02:10:48.000 Okay, I sent you the invite.

02:10:50.000 Did you get it?

02:10:51.000 Nope.

02:10:52.000 It is weird.

02:10:53.000 Some apps, you get a phone call on an app and it just shows up like your phone's ringing and you're like, hold on, what is this?

02:10:58.000 Someone's calling me from WhatsApp?

02:11:00.000 How the fuck that happened?

02:11:00.000 Oh, see, I can't initiate it.

02:11:07.000 Interesting.

02:11:08.000 Seems like it's not working.

02:11:09.000 It's not working.

02:11:10.000 It sucks.

02:11:10.000 Not working.

02:11:12.000 How close have you come to switching to the dark side?

02:11:15.000 Honestly?

02:11:17.000 I really, really thought about it the other day.

02:11:19.000 Really?

02:11:20.000 Because my cat went missing for a day.

02:11:24.000 Oh, it didn't have an air tag.

02:11:26.000 Right.

02:11:26.000 Well, the bitch won't wear a collar.

02:11:28.000 She's wearing, like, anti-control measures.

02:11:30.000 You know what I'm saying?

02:11:31.000 But there is one.

02:11:33.000 There is a certain kind of collar that I could force her to keep on.

02:11:37.000 Like, she would fucking hate it.

02:11:40.000 But...

02:11:43.000 There's just way more options.

02:11:46.000 Because the way AirTags...

02:11:47.000 Because Samsung has this version of AirTags called SmartTags.

02:11:50.000 But the way they work is they don't actually have GPS on themselves.

02:11:56.000 They just connect to any nearby Samsung or Apple device.

02:12:00.000 And there's way more iPhones around.

02:12:03.000 So it'll ping and it'll let the nearest iPhone device...

02:12:07.000 And it's all connected to a network.

02:12:09.000 So Apple can tell me...

02:12:11.000 Basically, if you get an invite going, your AirTag is here.

02:12:14.000 It means someone with an iPhone walked past that place.

02:12:25.000 Mm-hmm.

02:12:39.000 It's just less chances that I'll get an accurate location of where she is.

02:12:44.000 I really seriously thought about it because I'm serious about my cat.

02:12:49.000 I love that bitch.

02:12:50.000 But I just, just the whole ecosystem.

02:12:55.000 Also, you don't want your cat to have to wear a collar if it's going to piss her off.

02:12:59.000 She's wild.

02:12:59.000 Bruh, she don't like it.

02:13:01.000 She don't even like, she don't like being constrained in any way.

02:13:04.000 Yeah.

02:13:04.000 Nah, all that sniffy stuff.

02:13:06.000 And people try to come over like, no, I'm real good with cats.

02:13:09.000 And they pick her up.

02:13:10.000 Fuck off me, bitch.

02:13:11.000 I try to tell them this cat's different.

02:13:12.000 They got to sedate her at the vet.

02:13:15.000 Yeah, just to do basic shit.

02:13:17.000 They gotta sedate her.

02:13:18.000 Wow.

02:13:19.000 Yeah, she's wild.

02:13:20.000 I give her CBD drops before we go up in there.

02:13:23.000 Because she don't play that shit.

02:13:26.000 And I get it.

02:13:27.000 I'm like, she wild.

02:13:27.000 She's a wild cat.

02:13:28.000 She's wild.

02:13:29.000 She's wild, yeah.

02:13:30.000 Yeah, you can't put a collar on her anyway.

02:13:31.000 Don't do it.

02:13:32.000 Don't do it.

02:13:33.000 Like I said, she a smart girl.

02:13:34.000 She's been going outside for years.

02:13:36.000 She knows what to be scared of.

02:13:38.000 Yeah, there's not a whole lot of coyotes in Austin proper either.

02:13:42.000 It's really out in the hills.

02:13:44.000 Yeah, but you know what though?

02:13:45.000 No, because I forget.

02:13:47.000 They got Ron White's dog.

02:13:48.000 Remember that documentary I told you about the coy wolves?

02:13:51.000 Mm-hmm.

02:13:51.000 Where they were...

02:13:53.000 They were talking about how there are coyotes in every major city.

02:13:59.000 They're so good at staying in the shadows and hiding, but they're everywhere.

02:14:04.000 There's a great book on it called Coyote America.

02:14:06.000 Oh, man.

02:14:06.000 They're everywhere, right?

02:14:07.000 Yeah, I had the author on the other day.

02:14:09.000 It's really, it's an amazing story.

02:14:11.000 And are they, are they just a, why don't they kill them?

02:14:13.000 Is that a huge part of the ecosystem?

02:14:15.000 They're just smart.

02:14:16.000 This is the thing, like, when they killed off the wolves, the wolves were the one thing that was kind of keeping the coyotes, what would happen is, gray wolves and coyotes don't breed, but coyotes breed with red wolves, which are East Coast wolves.

02:14:30.000 So the coy wolves that you see are predominantly They're East Coast wolves that breed with coyotes.

02:14:36.000 But will a gray wolf breed with...

02:14:38.000 They'll kill coyotes.

02:14:39.000 But will they breed with a coy wolf?

02:14:40.000 Will they breed with a mixed...

02:14:42.000 No.

02:14:42.000 Oh.

02:14:42.000 They don't...

02:14:43.000 It's a different...

02:14:43.000 It's a different, I guess, a genus or subspecies.

02:14:47.000 I'm not sure exactly what the term would be, but it's a different animal.

02:14:51.000 And the coyote, when...

02:14:53.000 A coyote's basically a wolf.

02:14:55.000 It's just a small wolf.

02:14:56.000 And when coyotes get killed, what happens is they do roll call when they scream out at night sometimes.

02:15:02.000 And when one of them's missing, it forces the female to have more babies.

02:15:06.000 So they have larger litters.

02:15:08.000 And then they spread their territory out.

02:15:10.000 And so through persecution, like when they're trying to get them out of places, what they've made them do is expand to everywhere.

02:15:18.000 And now coyotes are in every single city in North America.

02:15:23.000 They're in New York City.

02:15:25.000 Coyotes are in Boston.

02:15:26.000 They're everywhere.

02:15:27.000 And that wasn't the case 50, 60 years ago.

02:15:30.000 It's like it's happened over the course of time, where they keep trying to say, get out of my lawn, bang, bang, they shoot them, and then the female coyote have more babies, and then you've got a bigger problem.

02:15:38.000 And they were everywhere in L.A. Yeah.

02:15:42.000 But the way he was explaining it, it's an evolutionary thing, because gray wolves, when they encountered coyotes, they would kill them.

02:15:49.000 And so coyotes, in order to compete with the larger, more vicious gray wolves, they just had to have more babies.

02:15:57.000 So they expand their territory and they have more babies.

02:15:59.000 So this strategy of, like, persecuting them and chasing them down and killing them, it just makes more coyotes.

02:16:04.000 But isn't there not enough food for more coyotes?

02:16:07.000 They're eating everybody's cats.

02:16:09.000 Right.

02:16:10.000 They're eating cats and dogs.

02:16:12.000 I mean, in LA, that's like probably the number one reason why dogs and cats go missing.

02:16:16.000 It's coyotes.

02:16:17.000 And if they're hungry enough, they'll walk right up to you and take your dog.

02:16:20.000 Oh yeah, they snatch them off people's leashes.

02:16:21.000 Especially old people walking a little dog.

02:16:24.000 What are you gonna do?

02:16:24.000 It's a little small wolf.

02:16:26.000 It's a 30 pound wolf.

02:16:27.000 You ain't gonna stop that thing from running off with your poodle.

02:16:30.000 And the thing is, if you was to hurt one of those coyotes, even if it was attacking your dog, people would still be like...

02:16:37.000 They'd be mad at you.

02:16:38.000 Yeah, you'd kill it.

02:16:39.000 Yeah, people are weird when they don't have a real understanding of what wild animals are.

02:16:44.000 They just have this anthropomorphized Disney version of what animals are until you encounter one.

02:16:50.000 You hear about that guy in Arizona a couple days ago that got eaten by a bear?

02:16:54.000 No.

02:16:54.000 He got killed by a bear while he was having coffee.

02:16:56.000 He's just camping out, having a good time, and this bear just runs up on him and starts fucking him up, and no one had a gun.

02:17:03.000 They're trying to stop it.

02:17:04.000 No one had a gun?

02:17:05.000 No one had a gun.

02:17:06.000 In Arizona?

02:17:07.000 In Arizona.

02:17:08.000 I didn't even know they had bears.

02:17:09.000 See if you can get the story.

02:17:10.000 Yeah, they have black bears.

02:17:11.000 It's like a desert bear?

02:17:12.000 Black bears.

02:17:13.000 There's a lot of black bears in Arizona.

02:17:14.000 Arizona's not all desert.

02:17:15.000 There's a lot of woods in Arizona.

02:17:17.000 Arizona man was mauled to death by a black bear in a rare unprovoked attack.

02:17:21.000 So he's just out there camping and the guy just fucking drinking his coffee and this bear runs up on him.

02:17:27.000 From multiple witness accounts and preliminary investigation of the scene, Mr. Jackson had been sitting having a coffee at a table on his property where he was building a home.

02:17:35.000 Oh, I thought he was camping.

02:17:38.000 Oh, so that's what the camper is.

02:17:39.000 So the camper is just like where he's operating on.

02:17:41.000 The sheriff's office said in a Facebook post, adding, Oh, so some guy did shoot him.

02:18:02.000 But unfortunately, at that time, Mr. Jackson succumbed to his horrible injuries.

02:18:06.000 Oh, my God.

02:18:08.000 That's the thing about black bears.

02:18:09.000 Black bears are more likely to be predatory attacks.

02:18:12.000 But imagine not starting with the gun.

02:18:14.000 I mean, that's the first thing.

02:18:16.000 You gotta probably run back to his house and get the gun.

02:18:19.000 Maybe the gun was in a safe.

02:18:22.000 That's tough.

02:18:22.000 How does a bear catch you unawares?

02:18:24.000 They can do it, man, if they're hungry.

02:18:26.000 So if that bear was predatory, that means that bear was really hungry.

02:18:29.000 So it was like sneaking?

02:18:30.000 Yeah.

02:18:31.000 They smell you.

02:18:32.000 Maybe he was cooking.

02:18:33.000 Imagine a stealthy bear.

02:18:34.000 That's one of the scariest things on the planet.

02:18:36.000 Well, if the dude had coffee, maybe he had breakfast before he had coffee and the smell of the breakfast was coming out of his little camper.

02:18:42.000 That's how you get when they bait bears.

02:18:44.000 They burn things and put things in the air to get the bears to come.

02:18:49.000 Like when they bait them.

02:18:50.000 When they bait them with like donuts and shit like that.

02:18:52.000 They do that in certain places where it's heavily wooded areas.

02:18:55.000 And literally the only way to hunt black bears is to bait them.

02:18:59.000 So you set up bait stands.

02:19:00.000 And you consistently feed those bears at that spot all the time.

02:19:04.000 Like you drop by food, you know, every couple times a week.

02:19:08.000 Oh, and then they get used to eat them.

02:19:10.000 Yeah, they know that that's the spot.

02:19:11.000 And so then you go and you wait in front of that spot.

02:19:14.000 It's very dirty.

02:19:16.000 It's a dirty game.

02:19:16.000 Yeah, but sometimes they're waiting on your ass.

02:19:18.000 Sometimes they are.

02:19:20.000 Wasn't it you telling me about the whales that learn how to...?

02:19:22.000 Orcas.

02:19:22.000 Yeah, they've learned how to fuck people's boats up.

02:19:25.000 That's so funny to me.

02:19:26.000 It's crazy.

02:19:27.000 It's kind of hilarious.

02:19:28.000 Because for all these years we've been mistreating them and finally they're like, enough!

02:19:32.000 I'm gonna start fucking up your boats.

02:19:34.000 And they're real smart creatures.

02:19:35.000 Oh yeah.

02:19:36.000 And they're probably teaching every whale in the ocean how to do that shit.

02:19:38.000 Probably.

02:19:39.000 At least the whale's there.

02:19:40.000 I think it's only one part of the world where this is happening right now, but the problem is the word gets out.

02:19:44.000 Yeah, they have those songs they sing, and they go hundreds of kilometers, and that's how they tell each other.

02:19:50.000 Hey, we fucking people up over here?

02:19:52.000 Did you see that video of the people in a kayak and a whale swallows them?

02:19:55.000 No.

02:19:56.000 These people are, like, they're whale watching, and there's a whale down there, and the whale literally swallows the entire kayak with the people in it.

02:20:04.000 So they weren't good at it.

02:20:05.000 And then spits them out.

02:20:07.000 I mean, the whale doesn't want to eat a kayak.

02:20:10.000 But how are you whale watching?

02:20:11.000 You don't see the motherfucker that's...

02:20:12.000 Well, I think that's how they were whale watching.

02:20:14.000 Look at this.

02:20:14.000 Literally just takes the kayak.

02:20:17.000 Maybe he's annoyed with them.

02:20:19.000 Maybe the kayaks are fucking up their fishing.

02:20:21.000 Look at that.

02:20:23.000 Bro.

02:20:24.000 That shit just broke your back.

02:20:26.000 California beach.

02:20:27.000 Oh yeah, easily could snap your legs in half.

02:20:30.000 Easily could snap your neck.

02:20:31.000 But they don't eat meat, right?

02:20:32.000 No.

02:20:33.000 But I mean, just the power alone.

02:20:35.000 How does it know what it's doing?

02:20:36.000 It's not gentle.

02:20:37.000 I mean, hopefully you still got hope it'll spit you up.

02:20:41.000 Hoping.

02:20:41.000 Yeah.

02:20:42.000 Hoping.

02:20:45.000 Yeah, look at that.

02:20:46.000 That's from a different angle.

02:20:47.000 Fucking insane.

02:20:48.000 This happened three years ago then.

02:20:50.000 Did it really?

02:20:50.000 Oh, no kidding.

02:20:51.000 That's weird.

02:20:52.000 I'm good on all of this.

02:20:54.000 That's weird.

02:20:55.000 I'm good on all of it.

02:20:55.000 I know it went viral again, which has been happening with quite a few videos.

02:20:58.000 So you see all the fish that's there?

02:21:00.000 You see all the fish that's in the water flapping around?

02:21:03.000 That's why the birds are there?

02:21:04.000 See all that splashing shit?

02:21:06.000 That's fish.

02:21:07.000 So the whales trying to eat the fish and these cocksuckers in this kind of...

02:21:11.000 Did they survive?

02:21:12.000 Yeah.

02:21:13.000 He spit them out.

02:21:14.000 Oh, lucky fox.

02:21:15.000 He wanted the fish.

02:21:16.000 He didn't want a kayak.

02:21:18.000 Were any of them seriously injured?

02:21:20.000 I don't know.

02:21:21.000 Good question.

02:21:23.000 Good question.

02:21:24.000 I don't get these people that need life-risking activities.

02:21:30.000 They don't think it's life-risking.

02:21:32.000 No.

02:21:33.000 I mean, this is in the top ten.

02:21:35.000 Like, if going down to the bottom of the ocean in an experimental sub is number one, this is on that list.

02:21:41.000 This is top ten.

02:21:42.000 Did you see the guy in the kayak that got attacked by a tiger shark?

02:21:46.000 No.

02:21:47.000 He's in the kayak, rowing, and you see this tiger shark just engulf half the side of his boat.

02:21:53.000 Was he shark-watching?

02:21:54.000 No, he was fishing.

02:21:55.000 Oh, okay.

02:21:56.000 He was fishing in his kayak.

02:21:57.000 Watch this.

02:22:03.000 Look, his foot's in the water, too, man.

02:22:05.000 Right?

02:22:06.000 Look at this.

02:22:10.000 Tiger Shark!

02:22:12.000 Tiger Shark ran me!

02:22:14.000 Holy...

02:22:14.000 Watch this.

02:22:16.000 So his foot.

02:22:18.000 So his foot's in the water, right?

02:22:21.000 That's the paddle is to the left, but his foot was in there, too.

02:22:24.000 Look at that thing.

02:22:26.000 Oh, so he was, like, waving it like this, and he thought the shark thought it was food?

02:22:29.000 Yeah, the shark probably thought it was a seal or some shit.

02:22:32.000 They're not smart.

02:22:36.000 Yeah, bro, I don't get it.

02:22:37.000 I don't get this desire to thrill-seek.

02:22:40.000 Look at this in slow motion.

02:22:41.000 Look at this thing come up.

02:22:45.000 Fucking A, man.

02:22:47.000 Thank God that wasn't inflatable, too.

02:22:49.000 Whoa!

02:22:52.000 What did I hear?

02:22:53.000 This is shark shit.

02:22:55.000 Some sharks attacked a boat recently.

02:22:56.000 Do you know about the dude in Egypt that got eaten?

02:22:58.000 I heard about it.

02:23:00.000 You didn't see that?

02:23:00.000 It was one of the bottom of the barrel tops, but I didn't know what the fuck they were talking about.

02:23:04.000 That was a rough one.

02:23:06.000 This dude is in Egypt and he's off the shore.

02:23:09.000 Netflix crew's whole boat exploded after back-to-back shark attacks in Hawaii.

02:23:14.000 Like something out of Jaws.

02:23:15.000 Oh my god.

02:23:16.000 I think they were filming it, so we'll probably not see it until...

02:23:19.000 Oh, my God.

02:23:20.000 Oh, Our Planet 2, so that would probably be really good.

02:23:23.000 Wow.

02:23:24.000 Yeah, I heard it was right out of Jaws.

02:23:26.000 So it was a shark attack, a shark attack, and then the boat exploded.

02:23:28.000 Oh, it was attacking the boat.

02:23:30.000 Yeah, if it exploded because of the gas, then yeah, that's right out of Jaws.

02:23:35.000 Is it saying it exploded, or are they saying it just fell apart?

02:23:38.000 I think it fell apart.

02:23:39.000 I think they said a rubber dinghy.

02:23:40.000 Can you scroll back down a little bit in there?

02:23:42.000 It says...

02:23:43.000 Nolan said the crew was only about 328 feet from the shore, so they were able to make it safer to land, though barely.

02:23:49.000 On land, they patched up the boat and deployed a rubber dinghy.

02:23:52.000 That was attacked by giant trevalles, marine fishes that can grow up to 6 feet long and weigh more than 100 pounds.

02:24:00.000 That attack knocked out the dinghy's motor.

02:24:02.000 What the fuck, man?

02:24:03.000 What's going on over there?

02:24:04.000 The behavior of the sharks they encountered was extremely unusual, Nolan told Radio Times.

02:24:09.000 They were incredibly hungry, so there might not have been enough natural food and they were just trying anything that came across in the water.

02:24:16.000 Wow.

02:24:17.000 It said it was just released, so it should be out.

02:24:20.000 Let me check.

02:24:21.000 Let's go to the Egyptian guy, though, first.

02:24:24.000 The Egyptian guy's rough, because he's screaming for his dad.

02:24:27.000 He's, like, yelling, Papa, while he's getting eaten alive by sharks, just, like, 100 yards offshore.

02:24:34.000 And apparently this area...

02:24:36.000 Now, we didn't...

02:24:37.000 Did we find out if that's true?

02:24:39.000 Someone had told me that that area that they had dumped sheep carcasses into the ocean in that area?

02:24:45.000 To attract the sharks.

02:24:46.000 I don't think they did it on purpose.

02:24:48.000 I think they just wanted to get rid of the sheep carcasses.

02:24:51.000 Oh, okay.

02:24:52.000 And the dad was...

02:24:53.000 The dad was on the shore.

02:24:56.000 Fishing?

02:24:57.000 No, they were just hanging out at a beach.

02:24:59.000 Oh.

02:25:00.000 It's at a resort.

02:25:01.000 Wow.

02:25:02.000 It's horrible.

02:25:03.000 And you have to see it.

02:25:05.000 I want to see it.

02:25:05.000 Yeah.

02:25:07.000 Wait a minute, this is a child?

02:25:09.000 No, it's a young man.

02:25:10.000 Oh, okay.

02:25:11.000 I can watch a young man die.

02:25:13.000 It's a rough one.

02:25:13.000 Here it is.

02:25:15.000 Warning graphic content.

02:25:16.000 And it is fucking graphic.

02:25:17.000 So this dude...

02:25:19.000 Is that the dude?

02:25:21.000 I think so.

02:25:22.000 That's not graphic.

02:25:22.000 That's him before?

02:25:23.000 Oh, no.

02:25:24.000 Oh, this is sad.

02:25:25.000 Okay, come on.

02:25:26.000 Yeah, it's sad.

02:25:28.000 Where's the video?

02:25:30.000 I don't know.

02:25:31.000 Oh, they're not showing the video of the actual attack?

02:25:37.000 Oh, they're gonna mummify the shark.

02:25:39.000 What's the purpose of that?

02:25:40.000 That's the video.

02:25:43.000 So here's the dudes out here.

02:25:46.000 The music is from the beach.

02:25:47.000 It's a little dark.

02:25:50.000 Look at that.

02:25:58.000 Oh, man.

02:25:59.000 Horrible, man.

02:26:01.000 You hear him yelling, Papa?

02:26:05.000 Oh my god!

02:26:07.000 Oh my god!

02:26:09.000 Look at all the red in the water, man.

02:26:11.000 It's so fucking horrible.

02:26:13.000 Oh my god!

02:26:14.000 Oh my god!

02:26:17.000 You see, just grab him and take him under.

02:26:19.000 No, I'm good.

02:26:21.000 Oh lord.

02:26:25.000 That's a lot.

02:26:31.000 That's a terrifying way to go.

02:26:33.000 What's worse, that or the sub people?

02:26:36.000 That.

02:26:37.000 That's worse.

02:26:39.000 That's worse.

02:26:39.000 Sub people would be down there for days.

02:26:42.000 Because the sub people either died instantly or they died falling asleep, running out of air.

02:26:50.000 But that right there, there's terror mixed in with that.

02:26:57.000 Oh, but that's terror being trapped in a...

02:26:58.000 It's also terror that your loved ones are watching you get eaten.

02:27:01.000 Yeah, but the one in the sub is dying with his son.

02:27:04.000 Oh!

02:27:06.000 That's bad, too.

02:27:06.000 And it was probably his idea, son.

02:27:08.000 Yeah, he probably talked to me too.

02:27:09.000 I'm gonna take you on an adventure.

02:27:10.000 You're gonna be a real man, like your father.

02:27:12.000 Yeah.

02:27:13.000 I'm gonna go to the bottom of the ocean like a fucking explorer.

02:27:15.000 Man, I don't know.

02:27:16.000 That's tough.

02:27:17.000 That's tough.

02:27:18.000 What's about it, Jamie?

02:27:19.000 I'm reading about the shark attack in Hawaii with the Netflix crew.

02:27:22.000 They were in an area where they were tracking baby albatross chicks, and they had an idea to get a good shot of tiger sharks who were about to feed on them.

02:27:30.000 So they took two smaller inflatable boats out.

02:27:33.000 And that's what got attacked.

02:27:35.000 An inflatable boat.

02:27:36.000 Oh my god.

02:27:36.000 That's why they exploded.

02:27:37.000 Oh my god, that's so stupid.

02:27:39.000 It says the crew panicked and then made an emergency landing on the sand.

02:27:43.000 Oh my god.

02:27:45.000 And I still don't know if there's video of it.

02:27:49.000 Yeah, sharks are feeding.

02:27:50.000 Get the fuck out of the water.

02:27:53.000 Yeah, especially don't go out in a boat that they can destroy.

02:27:56.000 Dude.

02:27:56.000 Yeah.

02:27:57.000 I mean, how many times do people have to see people in shark cages where the shark just slams into the cage and blows it to pieces?

02:28:02.000 I don't know, man.

02:28:03.000 I mean, because look, this is my thing.

02:28:05.000 The universe is trying to kill us.

02:28:07.000 Like, just the natural mathematics of the universe are deadly to us.

02:28:11.000 You being on land is like one of the handfuls of advantages you have as a human being.

02:28:18.000 Don't leave land.

02:28:21.000 Anything where you gotta leave the surface is you're taking unnecessary risk that goes against everything.

02:28:27.000 Your one advantage is on land.

02:28:30.000 You got all the disadvantages in the water, in space.

02:28:33.000 10,000 feet deep.

02:28:35.000 It's like, just stay on Earth.

02:28:36.000 But those surfers, the way they describe that feeling of riding that wave out there on the power of the ocean.

02:28:44.000 You know what I've never heard somebody describe?

02:28:45.000 What?

02:28:46.000 What it's like to get eaten by a shark.

02:28:47.000 Because they never survive.

02:28:49.000 They always did.

02:28:50.000 I don't think that's worth it.

02:28:52.000 But you know what?

02:28:53.000 You're right.

02:28:53.000 I don't know what catching a wave is like.

02:28:55.000 You know?

02:28:56.000 Because people feel the same way.

02:28:57.000 They see us doing stand-up and they go, I could never do that.

02:29:00.000 It's so terrifying.

02:29:01.000 It's like...

02:29:01.000 It's pretty easy.

02:29:02.000 It's pretty fun.

02:29:03.000 To you, right?

02:29:03.000 Yeah, but to a surfer, sharks are nothing.

02:29:07.000 You have no idea what it's like.

02:29:09.000 Right.

02:29:10.000 And I can understand that feeling.

02:29:12.000 I bet that has to be what it's like, because they're all kind of peaceful people.

02:29:16.000 It's interesting.

02:29:17.000 There's something about surfing that just brings about, like, there's a spiritual connection to the ocean.

02:29:23.000 Oh, no, they're not all peaceful.

02:29:24.000 Surfers?

02:29:25.000 Well, they're violent.

02:29:26.000 A lot of surfers are trash, right.

02:29:27.000 Really, they're real protective about...

02:29:29.000 But the really good ones, the ones that I've met that are really good, they're like, that's a special mindset.

02:29:33.000 Yeah, okay.

02:29:34.000 Like the Shane Dorians and the Laird Hamiltons.

02:29:37.000 Yeah, they do come up.

02:29:39.000 Yeah.

02:29:39.000 All those extremist people.

02:29:41.000 Remember the guy, I know you had him on, the free climbing guy?

02:29:45.000 Oh, Alex Honnold.

02:29:46.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

02:29:47.000 People like that, they all pretty much...

02:29:50.000 Calm.

02:29:51.000 Kelly Slater, same sort of thing.

02:29:54.000 Beast surfer, calm, chill, dude.

02:29:57.000 Probably the humility that comes with being in the ocean all the time.

02:30:00.000 I mean, if you're literally floating on a piece of styrofoam, that's fucking...

02:30:05.000 Riding a wave in the ocean.

02:30:07.000 You have so much humility because you're completely powerless.

02:30:11.000 All you're doing is using your own balance to try to ride the energy of this insane force that's behind you.

02:30:20.000 You can't really think You're awesome.

02:30:22.000 Because no matter how awesome you are as a human being, you're nothing compared to just the power of the thing you ride every day.

02:30:29.000 And you have to be able to be calm in one of the most terrifying situations.

02:30:33.000 Yeah, you got to keep your shit together when there's a hundred foot wave over you.

02:30:37.000 Can't be a surfer that panics.

02:30:39.000 No, you got to be able to hold that.

02:30:41.000 Yeah.

02:30:42.000 I feel the same way watching The Fighters, where I'm like, yo, how did you keep it together when like...

02:30:48.000 You've been in that choke hold for three seconds.

02:30:52.000 Two more seconds and you're out.

02:30:53.000 You're going to lose consciousness.

02:30:55.000 And you're calm.

02:30:56.000 You're still working your hands.

02:30:59.000 It's like they're still thinking when most people would panic.

02:31:02.000 Yeah.

02:31:03.000 I'm impressed by anybody.

02:31:05.000 I'm impressed by any expertise.

02:31:08.000 I'm obsessed with it.

02:31:09.000 I watch a YouTube video of a motherfucker just putting bricks together.

02:31:13.000 Me too.

02:31:14.000 You see it?

02:31:15.000 I'm like, that motherfucker's good.

02:31:17.000 Yeah, carpentry.

02:31:18.000 That's 20 years of experience.

02:31:19.000 Yeah.

02:31:20.000 Yeah, I love it.

02:31:21.000 Yeah, me too.

02:31:21.000 Yeah, expertise.

02:31:23.000 Yeah, I love watching people do things with their hands.

02:31:26.000 Craftsmanship, making watches and shit, little tiny microscope and they're fucking moving little pieces and gears around.

02:31:31.000 I love shit like that.

02:31:32.000 Just somebody that's dedicated their life to something.

02:31:35.000 Yeah.

02:31:36.000 Even schemas and scammers.

02:31:38.000 That's why I like a good bank heist.

02:31:42.000 You hear the real life stories of different heists and shit.

02:31:46.000 Yeah.

02:31:46.000 Some people have outsmarted everybody.

02:31:49.000 That's why...

02:31:52.000 When it comes to bank heists, that's why I'm interested in this SBF thing.

02:31:57.000 What is that?

02:31:58.000 Apparently, I just looked at it, and we might have got memed out of the actual headline.

02:32:04.000 The memes on the Twitter space were going that he might get all charges dropped.

02:32:08.000 No, but he got five dropped.

02:32:10.000 13 down to eight now, and he's still going on trial.

02:32:13.000 Which ones did they get rid of?

02:32:17.000 I don't know.

02:32:17.000 They could have maybe got overzealous with so many charges that they just kept throwing things down, and now this team got it down to accurate charges or something.

02:32:25.000 Right, good point.

02:32:26.000 Because I'm sure when they go to bring in a person like that, they probably double and triple down on charges.

02:32:30.000 One article says it's been worded as temporarily suspended charges.

02:32:34.000 Interesting.

02:32:36.000 Man, that motherfucker ain't going to prison, man.

02:32:38.000 You don't think so?

02:32:39.000 Maybe he'll go to a nice country cup for a little bit.

02:32:43.000 He's a billionaire, right?

02:32:45.000 Not anymore.

02:32:46.000 But he gave away a lot, though.

02:32:48.000 He gave away a lot to the Democratic Party.

02:32:51.000 But being a...

02:32:52.000 I've never seen a billionaire go to prison.

02:32:54.000 Oh, what about Bernie Madoff?

02:32:56.000 Okay, so let me...

02:32:58.000 As a caveat, the only time I've ever seen someone with that much money go to prison is when they fuck with other rich people's money.

02:33:06.000 That's what this guy did.

02:33:07.000 Bernie Madoff, the guy from Enron, was he fucking with rich people?

02:33:10.000 Elizabeth Holmes.

02:33:11.000 Yeah, that's a good one.

02:33:13.000 She was sentenced to 135 months, 11 years, 3 months in federal prison for defrauding investors in Theranos.

02:33:18.000 And she's going to prison out here.

02:33:20.000 She's going to prison in Texas.

02:33:21.000 Is she?

02:33:22.000 Yeah.

02:33:22.000 Yeah, that's not going to be...

02:33:24.000 She's probably still going to go to one of those nice ones.

02:33:27.000 11 years.

02:33:28.000 And she just had a couple of kids.

02:33:30.000 She pumped out a couple of kids before she went in, which is crazy.

02:33:33.000 Right.

02:33:33.000 Imagine having babies knowing you face in prison.

02:33:35.000 I think she's a sociopath.

02:33:37.000 Of course she's a sociopath.

02:33:38.000 And I think people like that would think if I have a kid, maybe they're less likely to lock me up for a long time because they know I'm a mother.

02:33:44.000 And listen, y'all might not want to hear this out, but listen.

02:33:48.000 Every billionaire should have a couple of hood dudes on staff because there's a certain kind of bullshit that only they can detect.

02:33:58.000 You know what I'm saying?

02:34:00.000 If you'd have had a Freddie Gibbs with you when you talked to that bitch, or like David Lucas, he would have known right away she was full of shit.

02:34:10.000 Yeah.

02:34:12.000 Well, a lot of people knew she was full of shit.

02:34:13.000 Well, right, but not the rich guys.

02:34:16.000 Even people inside the company knew she was full of shit.

02:34:18.000 Yeah, she knows how to fool people with money.

02:34:20.000 That's her whole skill.

02:34:21.000 You got to have somebody around you.

02:34:23.000 They do that in Japan.

02:34:25.000 Their culture is so much like respect and bowing and respect.

02:34:28.000 But so they have an American, like a designated American on staff at the big companies.

02:34:35.000 Because they know he'll say shit that everybody else won't.

02:34:38.000 Ah.

02:34:38.000 So he's around to be like, that's bullshit.

02:34:40.000 People are like, ah, he's American, but he's right though.

02:34:42.000 But no one else, you know what I'm saying?

02:34:43.000 Right.

02:34:44.000 I watch a thing on Netflix where they play the black boxes.

02:34:48.000 They do reenactments of plane crashes from the 80s.

02:34:51.000 And one of the problems back then was that the captain of an airplane was like the captain of a ship.

02:34:56.000 You didn't question him.

02:34:57.000 So half of the crashes were because some lower person wasn't empowered to say something.

02:35:03.000 Do you know that's why they switched Korean airlines?

02:35:05.000 They started making them speak English?

02:35:07.000 Right.

02:35:07.000 Well, whoa.

02:35:08.000 Yeah, because in Korea, there's a very specific way of talking to people that are higher above you or more respectful.

02:35:17.000 And then there's boundaries, cultural boundaries, that are very difficult to transcend.

02:35:22.000 But when you're speaking English, They don't have, that sort of same hierarchy doesn't exist in the language.

02:35:28.000 Okay, right.

02:35:29.000 And so they realize, this is from, I think it was Malcolm Gladwell's book, where they describe how they, to get over this problem, they started making them speak English.

02:35:39.000 Oh, I see.

02:35:40.000 Is that true?

02:35:42.000 Make sure that's accurate.

02:35:43.000 So like in Korean, you say thank you differently to a superior than you would to a stranger than you would to a regular person.

02:35:49.000 I get what you're saying.

02:35:50.000 Yeah, you wouldn't question the superior if they said, you know, we're in this direction.

02:35:54.000 You're like, no, we're wrong.

02:35:55.000 This is awful.

02:35:56.000 It's a lot like that in Japanese companies.

02:35:59.000 So a lot of, not all of them, but a lot of them, they have an American for that reason.

02:36:03.000 This is his book's illustration for the examples, so I don't know that that makes this better, but this is what the book said, I guess.

02:36:10.000 So, at the end of the 90s, Korean Air had more plane crashes than almost any other airline around the globe.

02:36:15.000 Cockpit miscommunication has been a persistent factor in these accidents.

02:36:18.000 For example, the Korean Air Flight 801 crash was attributed to the pilot's decision to land despite the junior officer's disagreement.

02:36:26.000 Evidence of high power distance, a culture that denotes Interesting.

02:36:52.000 Yeah.

02:36:53.000 Yeah.

02:36:54.000 Because if you were like, motherfucker, we out of fuel!

02:36:56.000 Right.

02:36:56.000 They would be like, oh, she's right, but when we land, you're fired.

02:36:58.000 Right.

02:36:58.000 You don't talk like that.

02:36:59.000 You know what I mean?

02:37:00.000 Yeah.

02:37:00.000 It's like, oh, shit.

02:37:01.000 Well, it's just the culture is very different.

02:37:04.000 You know, Korean culture is very different.

02:37:07.000 Man, they do a lot of things great over there.

02:37:11.000 They barbecue.

02:37:12.000 Oh, they make great barbecue.

02:37:14.000 They make some goddamn good barbecue over there, man.

02:37:16.000 They're good at kicking.

02:37:17.000 They're good at kicking.

02:37:19.000 Gaming.

02:37:20.000 Half of the...

02:37:22.000 I know you're not into esports, but half of the fucking esports teams are Korean.

02:37:28.000 Really?

02:37:28.000 Like, it'll be the London team, but half of them Korean.

02:37:31.000 Really?

02:37:31.000 So they recruit them?

02:37:32.000 It's like Korean, Russian...

02:37:35.000 You know, the Chinese always have their team, but most of the players on the top teams in the world of all esports are Korean players.

02:37:43.000 Interesting.

02:37:43.000 Because over there, there's not shame involved in the culture.

02:37:48.000 They literally have gaming cafes where you don't even own the computer.

02:37:52.000 You just go in and sign in and play.

02:37:55.000 Look at this guy's getting a massage.

02:37:57.000 The elite open school in Seoul.

02:37:59.000 Many students show up to morning classes sleep-deprived after hours of gaming.

02:38:04.000 So you should see how they're getting wrecked at night.

02:38:06.000 Yeah.

02:38:07.000 They're genuine stars over there.

02:38:09.000 Yeah, it's a real career path, which is pretty wild.

02:38:12.000 It's crazy.

02:38:14.000 Now, what game are they playing?

02:38:15.000 I think that game is League of Legends.

02:38:19.000 Yeah, that's League of Legends.

02:38:20.000 StarCraft was the other one they used to buy.

02:38:21.000 I think League had the largest prize for World Champion.

02:38:26.000 What's crazy is the audiences.

02:38:29.000 Massive audiences to see this.

02:38:31.000 Yeah, and they have the storylines and all of that.

02:38:34.000 You see the video where the dude dies gaming?

02:38:37.000 He just fucking conks out and dies.

02:38:40.000 He's leaning back.

02:38:41.000 People thought he was asleep and he was dead.

02:38:44.000 He just gamed until he died.

02:38:46.000 Because it's something...

02:38:48.000 There's something about...

02:38:49.000 Because the best games have...

02:38:52.000 They combine a power fantasy with an enjoyable gameplay loop.

02:38:57.000 This is not 2015. This is real recent.

02:39:00.000 Oh, wow.

02:39:01.000 Actually, it might not have been real recent.

02:39:03.000 Three days straight?

02:39:04.000 That's how the man dies gaming and I was...

02:39:07.000 No, this was like the guy died in his chair.

02:39:10.000 There's a video of him in the chair and he just leans back.

02:39:13.000 And his head falls back and it looks like he's sleeping.

02:39:16.000 And he's just dead.

02:39:18.000 That's crazy.

02:39:19.000 Three days is a lot.

02:39:20.000 It might have been one of them Instagram things where I don't even know when it was.

02:39:23.000 The thing is, I'm not good if I don't wash my ass.

02:39:24.000 I don't feel clean.

02:39:25.000 My aim is off and everything.

02:39:27.000 You gotta take a break.

02:39:28.000 It's not healthy behavior.

02:39:30.000 And people have let their children starve to death.

02:39:32.000 But I love it.

02:39:33.000 It's my...

02:39:34.000 It's my side pastime, the thing I do when I'm trying to relax.

02:39:39.000 Like Diablo 4 just came out.

02:39:40.000 That shit took my fucking life off.

02:39:42.000 I took three days off and I played it for three days.

02:39:45.000 And I was like, okay, now I gotta focus back because I'm filming my special soon.

02:39:48.000 I filmed my special at the Mothership.

02:39:50.000 In August.

02:39:51.000 Yeah, I'm excited.

02:39:52.000 Yeah, yeah.

02:39:53.000 I'm excited.

02:39:53.000 So I'm like, I've got to lock in on a special, but I was like, I love this game, and I'm just going to take some days and just enjoy it.

02:40:00.000 It's awesome.

02:40:01.000 Yeah.

02:40:02.000 Hell yeah.

02:40:02.000 You're just slaying demons from hell.

02:40:04.000 I haven't seen the graphics in the new Diablo.

02:40:07.000 Oh, it's incredible.

02:40:08.000 Let me see.

02:40:08.000 Diablo 4. Show me some.

02:40:13.000 Yeah, comics and gaming, man.

02:40:16.000 Yeah, it's either gaming or wrestling or something.

02:40:18.000 Something.

02:40:18.000 It's always something.

02:40:19.000 It's always something where it's a fantasy.

02:40:21.000 Yeah, fantasy shit.

02:40:23.000 A lot of comics are into pro wrestling.

02:40:24.000 In this shit, it's like you're literally slaying hordes of demons from hell.

02:40:32.000 Depending on how you set up your character, you're hitting them with lightning bolts, you're hitting them with fireballs, you're chopping them to pieces.

02:40:39.000 Is it overhead perspective?

02:40:40.000 Yeah, it's overhead perspective.

02:40:42.000 Oh, so this is what you're seeing when you're playing?

02:40:43.000 Yeah, this is what you're seeing.

02:40:44.000 I think this guy, he's a barbarian.

02:40:49.000 So you don't see a lot of barbarians.

02:40:52.000 Now, wouldn't it be more exciting to do this as a first player?

02:40:58.000 They did that with Skyrim.

02:41:02.000 Yeah?

02:41:02.000 Yeah, they kind of did.

02:41:03.000 But Diablo's kind of a different thing because...

02:41:06.000 Jesus, look at all the numbers.

02:41:07.000 What do those numbers mean?

02:41:08.000 So the numbers are how much damage you're doing, but the different colors mean different hits.

02:41:13.000 So like the yellow is a critical hit.

02:41:17.000 It just means you have a chance...

02:41:18.000 Whatever you hit, you have a chance to do critical damage, which is like bonus 150% damage.

02:41:22.000 So what did you just do out of that box?

02:41:24.000 Did he just grab some stuff?

02:41:25.000 Yeah, the whole thing is you're killing monsters, they're dropping items, or you're opening chests, they're dropping items, the items make you stronger, or give you different powers, and you're trying to combine the right items to do bigger and bigger numbers.

02:41:40.000 And the more you play, the more items you get, so the more power you get.

02:41:43.000 Right, the more powerful items you get.

02:41:44.000 So you get addicted.

02:41:46.000 Yep, and there's gambling.

02:41:47.000 This is ridiculous.

02:41:50.000 Well, this is a real, real high-level guy, real deep into the game.

02:41:53.000 I mean, he's level 78. What level are you?

02:41:56.000 76. Jesus, so you're right up there.

02:41:59.000 Yeah, the max level's 100. Wow.

02:42:01.000 There's only 4,000 people that have hit level 100. So are those dudes chasing him, or are they fighting with him?

02:42:07.000 They're chasing him.

02:42:09.000 Oh, wow.

02:42:09.000 Yeah, nobody's on his team in this.

02:42:12.000 But you can play with...

02:42:13.000 I play with Frank Castillo.

02:42:16.000 And sometimes if I'm on and he signs on and he sees I'm playing, he can just jump right in.

02:42:22.000 Oh, and so you guys can team up.

02:42:23.000 Right, we can team up.

02:42:24.000 We can be on my team.

02:42:25.000 And you talk shit to each other?

02:42:26.000 Yeah, or we coordinate, for example, like...

02:42:30.000 You can't really see it because he's killing them so fast, but sometimes he hits the monster and they turn purple.

02:42:35.000 Purple means they're vulnerable.

02:42:37.000 It means they take more damage, but you can have other skills that do other shit when the monster's vulnerable, so I'll make everybody vulnerable, and Frank has some skill that exploits that, and so we kind of team it up.

02:42:49.000 Little stuff like that.

02:42:50.000 Sounds like a great way to waste your life.

02:42:52.000 It's such a waste of time, yeah.

02:42:54.000 It seems so addictive.

02:42:55.000 But it's fun.

02:42:58.000 It's also very fun.

02:42:59.000 And so, you know, they didn't send me no merch.

02:43:02.000 I would like some merch, Diablo people.

02:43:04.000 They're so good at making things, like, the more you play it, the more you get.

02:43:09.000 Well, that's what I was telling you, is the...

02:43:11.000 The perfect games are the ones where it's a power fantasy and a fun loop.

02:43:17.000 Because basically, you're playing hours and hours and you're doing the same thing over and over again.

02:43:21.000 You're just killing hordes of monsters.

02:43:22.000 But the reward...

02:43:26.000 For that is spaced out just enough.

02:43:30.000 Because when you level up, it goes ding!

02:43:32.000 And your guy goes ah!

02:43:33.000 And then everything dies.

02:43:34.000 Everything around you dies.

02:43:35.000 Whenever you level up, everything dies.

02:43:37.000 So it's like, it's this big event and you level up and you're like, oh shit, now I can go put points into this power.

02:43:42.000 Because there's a whole skill tree.

02:43:44.000 So you unlock points to put in the skill tree and you can change how your skills act and all of this other shit.

02:43:50.000 So it's like the options, the things to do are so varied and the loop is fun and you get rewarded at just the right intervals in that loop.

02:44:05.000 I'm getting anxiety just hearing you talk about it.

02:44:09.000 But I don't really have that addictive of a personality.

02:44:12.000 I can stop whenever I want.

02:44:14.000 That's good.

02:44:15.000 That's good.

02:44:16.000 Because Duncan didn't.

02:44:17.000 Duncan was gone for long periods of time.

02:44:20.000 The first game like that was EverQuest.

02:44:22.000 Oh, that's what I heard, yeah.

02:44:24.000 Yeah, EverQuest and then WoW kind of took that over, but EverQuest originally, I never got into that because I seen it ruin people's marriages.

02:44:30.000 Yeah.

02:44:31.000 And they came out with EverQuest 2. I seen that fuck people up.

02:44:34.000 You know, World of Warcraft, I stayed away from it.

02:44:36.000 I seen it fuck people up.

02:44:37.000 And Diablo 2 fucked me up.

02:44:39.000 And Diablo 3 was okay.

02:44:40.000 I didn't really play it that much, but...

02:44:42.000 This one has the same little something.

02:44:44.000 It's just the perfect mix of all those things.

02:44:46.000 And it makes you...

02:44:48.000 It's just like casinos.

02:44:49.000 Casinos know...

02:44:51.000 That's why they have you put...

02:44:54.000 You don't put money in machines anymore.

02:44:56.000 You put money on a card.

02:44:58.000 And that card is on your account.

02:45:00.000 So when you go sit down at that machine, they know, oh, you haven't played today.

02:45:05.000 You know what I mean?

02:45:06.000 You put your card in that machine and they let you, you know, the four rolls are random and that fifth one you win a little.

02:45:15.000 Because legally, someone has to win the jackpot every X amount of rolls.

02:45:19.000 They can go X amount of rolls, someone has to win.

02:45:22.000 So they set the machine up like that, but everything in between, it's just a game playing with you.

02:45:26.000 You win a little, you lose a little.

02:45:28.000 You play again, you win a lot more than that, but not a significant amount, and that is enough to hook you.

02:45:33.000 Now you're playing more and more, and you win a little, win a little, win a little, but if you sit there long enough, you're going to be out of money.

02:45:39.000 And that's the whole point.

02:45:40.000 It's all set up to take your money.

02:45:42.000 Yeah, and you people voluntarily sign up for it.

02:45:45.000 Just for that reward.

02:45:46.000 The rate the lights flash, all that.

02:45:48.000 It goes into all that.

02:45:49.000 The color of the room, the way the room smells, the way it's set up.

02:45:54.000 It's a maze.

02:45:55.000 You ever go to a casino for the first time, it's fucking confusing as fuck.

02:45:59.000 It's supposed to be that.

02:46:01.000 Everything's set up for you to spend money and feel comfortable doing it.

02:46:04.000 And get trapped in there.

02:46:05.000 That's why they walk up and give you a couple drinks.

02:46:07.000 Yeah, lower your inhibitions.

02:46:09.000 Take a chance.

02:46:10.000 Did you see the girl at the poker machine that just pissed herself?

02:46:13.000 No.

02:46:13.000 You ever see that?

02:46:15.000 Apparently, people at casinos say it happens all the time.

02:46:17.000 People are gambling and they don't want to get up, so they just pee.

02:46:21.000 Yeah.

02:46:22.000 That is wild.

02:46:23.000 A gambling addiction.

02:46:24.000 Look at this lady.

02:46:25.000 She's sitting there.

02:46:26.000 She looks good, too.

02:46:26.000 Look, she's just pissing.

02:46:29.000 She's pissing while she's on the phone.

02:46:32.000 Granted, she's probably shit-faced too.

02:46:34.000 I guess, but still.

02:46:37.000 You don't know you're pissing on the floor?

02:46:38.000 Probably doesn't.

02:46:39.000 I think people just piss.

02:46:41.000 The shitting is worse.

02:46:42.000 People are walking through grocery stores and shit falls out of their leg.

02:46:46.000 Oh, I've seen that.

02:46:46.000 Like they're running a marathon?

02:46:47.000 Yeah, I saw one where this guy pulled his pants down at a store and just shot rocket out of his asshole.

02:46:52.000 How are they shitting on that submarine?

02:46:55.000 Can you imagine that?

02:46:56.000 That's themskies, because you're not flushing that toilet.

02:46:58.000 I bet your anxiety is still higher, just not...

02:47:01.000 Nah, my dude.

02:47:02.000 That would be torture for me.

02:47:04.000 I'd be like, kill me first.

02:47:05.000 How much water do they have?

02:47:06.000 I mean, you might get dehydrated down there, too.

02:47:09.000 You might run out of water.

02:47:11.000 Yeah.

02:47:12.000 I mean, you can't go very many days without water.

02:47:14.000 I think three.

02:47:15.000 Yeah, I mean, how many days?

02:47:17.000 No, seven.

02:47:17.000 I think seven is the max.

02:47:20.000 You can go without water.

02:47:21.000 Fuck.

02:47:22.000 You can probably make it like a month without food.

02:47:25.000 You can make it longer without food if you're fat.

02:47:27.000 If you're real fat.

02:47:28.000 Yeah.

02:47:28.000 But without water?

02:47:29.000 Yeah.

02:47:30.000 You're done skiing.

02:47:31.000 You're done skiing.

02:47:32.000 But it's a lot easier to find fresh water.

02:47:34.000 Or I'll say you could even risk it and drink contaminated water in an emergency, right?

02:47:40.000 I guess.

02:47:41.000 It's not just food everywhere.

02:47:42.000 I guess.

02:47:44.000 I'm looking up updates.

02:47:45.000 A retired Navy captain just brought up the point about how cold it probably is down there.

02:47:49.000 Oh, Jesus.

02:47:50.000 Because that doesn't probably have tons of insulation.

02:47:52.000 Oh, Jesus.

02:47:53.000 And where they're at, though, it says the water entirely is around the ship is at freezing or slightly below.

02:47:57.000 When they exhale, their breath condenses.

02:47:59.000 There's frost on the inside of the parts of the submarine.

02:48:01.000 They're all together trying to conserve body heat.

02:48:03.000 Oh, my God.

02:48:04.000 And they're running low on oxygen and breathing each other.

02:48:07.000 And here's the thing.

02:48:08.000 Even if they find them, how do you get it up?

02:48:13.000 How do you get it?

02:48:14.000 Yeah, they'd have to tow it up or something.

02:48:15.000 Yeah, because when we started the podcast, you said how many hours left?

02:48:19.000 They're down to their last day.

02:48:20.000 They have until like 5 in the morning right now.

02:48:22.000 It's like 12 hours.

02:48:23.000 They have until 5 in the morning until they're out of oxygen.

02:48:25.000 Yeah.

02:48:25.000 Yeah, but what I'm saying is You have to account for how long it would take to bring them to the top and open the fucking thing.

02:48:34.000 So it's like they don't have till 5 in the morning.

02:48:37.000 They need to be found and on their way to the top for them to have till 5 a.m.

02:48:42.000 And what are the strategies?

02:48:43.000 Is there any article on the strategies that they're using?

02:48:46.000 I remember looking that up last night.

02:48:47.000 I was even contemplating, do they even have a machine or device or anything that could go even get them besides a drone?

02:48:55.000 Right.

02:48:56.000 Man, I don't know that there even is.

02:48:58.000 So what the fuck are they doing?

02:49:00.000 Are they just trying to find them so they can communicate with them?

02:49:02.000 Are they trying to find them so they can use the power of the remote controller to bring them to the surface?

02:49:07.000 I don't even think they know where they are still.

02:49:10.000 Jesus Christ.

02:49:11.000 Yeah, like I think it says that they lost communication like an hour and a half after they departed.

02:49:15.000 Oh my god.

02:49:17.000 So they weren't even all the way down then, right?

02:49:19.000 Or that happened right when they hit the bottom.

02:49:24.000 The entire voyage is supposed to take two and a half hours.

02:49:26.000 The Polar Prince lost contact with the Titan approximately one hour and 45 minutes into the trip, triggering a desperate search for the now-missing sub.

02:49:36.000 And I remember the reporter said it was lost for five hours when he went last year.

02:49:41.000 Oh my god.

02:49:42.000 So it happens.

02:49:44.000 It has happened.

02:49:45.000 And they didn't add a transponder.

02:49:48.000 Oh my god.

02:49:50.000 Or whatever they could add.

02:49:51.000 His voyage lasted ten hours.

02:49:53.000 The passengers were given sandwiches and water.

02:49:56.000 During that vessel, the compass was acting very weird and the passengers had only about 20 minutes to view the Titanic wreckage.

02:50:03.000 The compass acted weird?

02:50:04.000 Yeah.

02:50:06.000 Bro, imagine if there's an alien ship down there that's fucking them up.

02:50:09.000 Bro, but if your comp is going crazy, you need to get the fuck out of there.

02:50:12.000 Instantly.

02:50:12.000 I don't know the science of what that means, but that's never good.

02:50:15.000 Can't be good.

02:50:16.000 No.

02:50:16.000 Some crazy magnets are in there.

02:50:18.000 What's going on?

02:50:18.000 Or some kind of pulse from the earth.

02:50:20.000 Who the fuck knows?

02:50:21.000 Who the fuck knows?

02:50:21.000 Here's what's so wild about all this shit, Dojo.

02:50:24.000 They went down there.

02:50:27.000 To look at the wreckage from screens inside, from cameras outside.

02:50:33.000 You understand what I'm saying?

02:50:34.000 Yeah, there was one little tiny hole above the toilet for looking out, but you can't see anything down there.

02:50:39.000 You know what I mean?

02:50:41.000 Their main thing was to watch.

02:50:43.000 You could have just sent down a drone and watched the screen on the ship.

02:50:46.000 You didn't have to be in the ship.

02:50:46.000 You don't have to be in the water, no.

02:50:48.000 You're down there for no reason.

02:50:50.000 Just so you can say you was there.

02:50:52.000 I'd have just lied about it.

02:50:54.000 Yeah.

02:50:55.000 You don't want to lie about it either.

02:50:56.000 About being down there?

02:50:57.000 Yeah, it's just stupid.

02:50:58.000 Yeah, but if you're an alternative to getting on the motherfuckers?

02:51:01.000 If I had to choose, I'd lie about it.

02:51:04.000 If I have to lie, no one's getting hurt by that lie.

02:51:06.000 I'll tell you what I'm not doing.

02:51:08.000 I'm not getting on a ship that's piloted by a motherfucker that ain't on the ship.

02:51:13.000 Right.

02:51:13.000 The pilot, the driver got to take all the risks I'm taking.

02:51:16.000 Yes.

02:51:17.000 And also, how about have that ship been able to drive itself, too?

02:51:21.000 Think about this.

02:51:22.000 What if they got to the technology?

02:51:23.000 Well, actually, we probably do have the technology where your commercial flight can be flown by a pilot that's That never leaves the city.

02:51:30.000 They're flying it remotely.

02:51:32.000 I bet they could do that now.

02:51:33.000 And then when you break a certain line, another pilot at the landing city takes over and they land.

02:51:38.000 But would you be comfortable with that?

02:51:39.000 No.

02:51:40.000 Fuck no.

02:51:41.000 Get your ass on this plane.

02:51:43.000 You got to be up here with me.

02:51:44.000 If you in charge, you got to be up here with me.

02:51:46.000 Not only that, why wouldn't they have a system where when they lose communication with the sub, the sub just rises to the top?

02:51:51.000 Which has happened before.

02:51:52.000 So they've lost communication before.

02:51:54.000 And then they had no black-up plan for what would happen if it happened again.

02:51:58.000 Why does this scare me more than anything else?

02:52:00.000 This freaks me out so...

02:52:02.000 Because you're wealthy?

02:52:03.000 And they target wealthy people with shit like this?

02:52:06.000 No!

02:52:06.000 I'm not worried that I would do it.

02:52:09.000 Oh, okay.

02:52:09.000 No!

02:52:10.000 Just the idea of...

02:52:11.000 I have zero desire to do that.

02:52:14.000 Bro, I'd rather go fishing.

02:52:16.000 I'd rather go play pool.

02:52:18.000 I'm not complicated.

02:52:20.000 Zero!

02:52:21.000 I mean zero.

02:52:23.000 Not a fucking chance.

02:52:25.000 And one of my friends, if you were trying to go, I would do everything that I could.

02:52:29.000 Not you.

02:52:29.000 Someone irresponsible.

02:52:31.000 Someone crazy.

02:52:31.000 Bro, I don't even play survival video games.

02:52:34.000 Fuck that.

02:52:35.000 No, I've survived my whole life.

02:52:37.000 You know these games where you start out in the woods, all you have is a hatchet?

02:52:41.000 They're like, yeah, you gotta build a fire and find a shelter.

02:52:43.000 What the fuck?

02:52:44.000 Nah, nah, nah, nah.

02:52:45.000 I'm here to kill demons.

02:52:47.000 I'll kill demons with magical weaponry, but...

02:52:50.000 This is a device that they have the first thing to come find them today.

02:52:56.000 It's called a Victor 6000. It can go 20,000 feet, which is plenty to get there, but...

02:53:02.000 But what's it going to do?

02:53:02.000 That don't look like it can lift anything.

02:53:04.000 I'm looking at, like, it shows that they send it out from a ship with some sort of tow rope, and maybe they keep the tow rope, and maybe then they can hook something onto it and tow them both back up, but that's a lot of maybes, I just said.

02:53:14.000 It's a lot of maybes, and they have to find them.

02:53:16.000 And they have to find them.

02:53:17.000 The amount of area you're talking about is so immense.

02:53:20.000 Yeah, this does have some sort of rope.

02:53:22.000 I mean, honestly, knowing that they lost communication almost right when they hit the bottom, I'm telling you, I think it imploded.

02:53:30.000 Something leaked.

02:53:31.000 It was an opening, a crack.

02:53:32.000 I think they died instantly.

02:53:34.000 Oh, God.

02:53:35.000 What?

02:53:35.000 Ooh, do you think they're gonna send down people in subs to see the wreckage of the sub?

02:53:39.000 Oh, yeah.

02:53:40.000 Oh, yeah.

02:53:41.000 So that'll be the next thing.

02:53:43.000 People can go visit the Titan.

02:53:44.000 This is back when they did it wrong.

02:53:45.000 Like Mount Everest.

02:53:46.000 Yeah, there's the billionaire and his son, Frozen, and the Titan.

02:53:49.000 Don't fuck around then.

02:53:50.000 And here's...

02:53:51.000 Bro, here's what...

02:53:51.000 People comparing it to space, but guess what?

02:53:54.000 As far as we know, there ain't no monsters in space.

02:53:56.000 There's monsters all over the bottom of the ocean.

02:53:59.000 That's crazy.

02:54:00.000 And that might have been what happened.

02:54:01.000 Some big-ass thing that they don't see coming...

02:54:05.000 Hit that motherfucker with its tail.

02:54:11.000 A whale just fucked your magnetic shit up, flipped you over.

02:54:18.000 One of the things that's interesting about these UFO sightings is a lot of them are happening over water.

02:54:23.000 And they're saying these things go into the water and they don't make a splash.

02:54:28.000 Yeah, but this is my thing about the UFO sightings thing.

02:54:32.000 It's like...

02:54:34.000 It's too many smartphones out here for us to not get at least some 1080p.

02:54:39.000 You know, some clear footage that's not blurry.

02:54:43.000 Give me some clear videos out here.

02:54:45.000 True, but have you ever tried filming a bird in the sky?

02:54:48.000 It's very hard.

02:54:49.000 True, true.

02:54:51.000 I saw a thing the other day where I was like, I can't explain what I'm looking at.

02:54:55.000 You know what I mean?

02:54:56.000 I don't know if it's a...

02:54:57.000 Because it might have just been a drone, but it seemed so huge and it seemed like it was going up so high.

02:55:03.000 But it would have had to have been a commercial drone, not a government one.

02:55:08.000 And it kept flying up and then moving to the side and then floating back down.

02:55:14.000 And then flying way up to the point when I first saw it, I thought it was a plane.

02:55:18.000 But then it started moving completely backwards.

02:55:20.000 They make some insane drones now.

02:55:23.000 And they're really fast.

02:55:25.000 Have you ever seen the drones where they do them through obstacle courses?

02:55:28.000 Oh, the races?

02:55:28.000 Oh, that's wild.

02:55:30.000 That's entertaining, too.

02:55:31.000 That's entertaining.

02:55:32.000 Yeah, that's going to be real popular in the future.

02:55:34.000 Oh, for sure.

02:55:35.000 Because these things are getting better and better.

02:55:37.000 Have you ever seen that one where that drone takes off at insane rates of speed?

02:55:44.000 They have this drone, and it's hovering, and it goes...

02:55:48.000 Watch this.

02:55:49.000 I just clicked a video to find the fastest drone that you can get.

02:55:53.000 Let me see what it looks like.

02:55:54.000 Has it got any volume on this?

02:55:59.000 You can't even see that motherfucker.

02:56:05.000 It's almost 200 miles an hour.

02:56:07.000 Wow, listen to the sound.

02:56:10.000 Where is it?

02:56:11.000 Oh, there it is.

02:56:14.000 God damn, that fucker's fast.

02:56:16.000 And this camera is on the drone, this one right here.

02:56:18.000 Yeah, look at the shape of it.

02:56:20.000 It looks like a tic-tac.

02:56:21.000 Whoa.

02:56:22.000 Oh my god.

02:56:22.000 I mean, that's not the same.

02:56:23.000 It looks like a rocket.

02:56:27.000 How crazy is that thing can go 200 miles an hour?

02:56:32.000 Is that the fastest drone?

02:56:34.000 What a shitty sound that is.

02:56:35.000 That's wild.

02:56:36.000 It sounds like death.

02:56:37.000 All I have to do is put a gun on that thing.

02:56:39.000 I mean, I typed in fastest drone.

02:56:42.000 Yeah, Hans just bought one of those.

02:56:43.000 Go to videos.

02:56:44.000 Fastest drone videos.

02:56:46.000 Eight props is faster than that.

02:56:48.000 Oh my god, look at that thing.

02:56:52.000 Three world's fastest drones.

02:56:54.000 Let's see.

02:56:56.000 Show me something, stupid.

02:56:59.000 Oh, this is a commercial for these drones.

02:57:01.000 34 minute flight time.

02:57:02.000 Wow.

02:57:05.000 Yeah, they're getting very, very sophisticated.

02:57:07.000 It's pretty cool.

02:57:08.000 You know, and then how long after that before they're pilotable?

02:57:12.000 Where you can get in one of those things and move around in something like that.

02:57:15.000 Yeah, and then someone else is flying it.

02:57:16.000 And then someone slams into you in the sky.

02:57:21.000 Yeah.

02:57:22.000 Why are we so fascinated with death?

02:57:25.000 Because it's inevitable, and we're afraid of it, so we like to get close to it, get a little juice, and then go back to life.

02:57:32.000 That's what those climbers are doing.

02:57:34.000 Well, have you ever really lived if you didn't almost die?

02:57:36.000 Are you really an adult until you've almost died a couple times?

02:57:40.000 You are still an adult, but you do not have the same experiences.

02:57:44.000 If I'm in a room full of grown men, and I just go, everybody tell a story about the last time you almost died.

02:57:52.000 Everyone will have a couple.

02:57:54.000 You know?

02:57:55.000 Yeah.

02:57:55.000 It's sort of a rite of passage, but it's like, if you're living life properly, it's almost inevitable.

02:58:01.000 But then you can push it too far, and you're some wild climber dude.

02:58:05.000 Yeah, you're one of these motherfuckers.

02:58:06.000 You climb a mountain with no ropes.

02:58:08.000 Have you ever seen that documentary, The Alpinist?

02:58:11.000 No.

02:58:11.000 Oh, you gotta watch it.

02:58:12.000 The Alpinist?

02:58:13.000 Yeah.

02:58:14.000 Is that a tree person?

02:58:15.000 No, no, no, no, no.

02:58:17.000 What is that?

02:58:18.000 What is it?

02:58:19.000 Oh, the Alps.

02:58:20.000 An arborist.

02:58:21.000 Arborist, yeah.

02:58:22.000 Yeah, alpinist is someone who's climbing insane alpine mountains.

02:58:26.000 And this fucking dude was like the one that all the other climbers were like, what the fuck?

02:58:31.000 Like, he was just crazy.

02:58:33.000 And he, at the end of his life, was climbing ice.

02:58:36.000 Is this Netflix?

02:58:37.000 Um, I don't know.

02:58:39.000 They're always weird looking.

02:58:42.000 He was free climbing for a while.

02:58:43.000 He's an interesting dude.

02:58:45.000 He was an interesting dude, I should say.

02:58:46.000 Just listening to the recordings of him.

02:58:48.000 But he became obsessed with all these, you know, top-notch climbers, and he did free solo climbing.

02:58:54.000 Then after a while he started doing ice climbing.

02:58:56.000 So he's climbing with these ice picks, and he's making his way up glaciers.

02:59:01.000 So he's climbing, like, stalagmites that are hanging off the side of a cliff.

02:59:07.000 He's climbing them in the documentary.

02:59:09.000 It's so hard to watch.

02:59:11.000 Your hands start sweating.

02:59:13.000 And did he die during this?

02:59:14.000 Oh, yeah.

02:59:14.000 Yeah.

02:59:15.000 And they found him.

02:59:16.000 I mean, they know where he is.

02:59:17.000 They never even recovered him.

02:59:18.000 The glacier just kind of consumed his body.

02:59:21.000 But they found where his body is.

02:59:23.000 I don't think they recovered him, right?

02:59:25.000 Is that correct?

02:59:26.000 I think that happens with a lot of those guys.

02:59:28.000 It's like you can't even recover him.

02:59:30.000 Because to recover him, you would have to risk everybody's life to go recover a dead body.

02:59:33.000 But man, they be living though.

02:59:35.000 I guess.

02:59:35.000 They be living.

02:59:36.000 I think a lot of those guys, there's something wrong with them.

02:59:39.000 And that's the way they feel things.

02:59:41.000 I think regular life is just flat and boring, and the only way they feel is to do something insanely risky.

02:59:47.000 I slightly disagree.

02:59:48.000 I think some people are just born in the wrong time, you know?

02:59:52.000 Hmm.

02:59:55.000 If we were already at the point where we could explore space, these would be the starship captains.

02:59:59.000 They were the guys that would get on a ship and try to map the globe.

03:00:04.000 It was beneficial.

03:00:06.000 It's just now we're so comfortable.

03:00:08.000 They have to go find and seek out things, but their kind of person is necessary.

03:00:15.000 Explorers.

03:00:16.000 Yeah, explorers.

03:00:17.000 People that would take the chances just for the thrill.

03:00:19.000 We do need them.

03:00:20.000 We just don't need them right this second.

03:00:21.000 Yeah, those are those people that would just get in boats and try to find new land back in the day.

03:00:26.000 Yeah, those are the people you pay to make the first hundred trips in the Titan to make sure it's safe.

03:00:31.000 Imagine the people that made it to the Hawaiian Islands in little boats that they made.

03:00:37.000 Yeah.

03:00:38.000 I mean, they came from the Polynesian Islands, and they made their way across the fucking ocean to Hawaii.

03:00:46.000 Yeah, they were like, oh, we hit the jackpot.

03:00:47.000 Oh my god, they hit the jackpot.

03:00:49.000 Yeah.

03:00:50.000 But they did that shit thousands of years ago.

03:00:53.000 That's what's crazy.

03:00:55.000 Yeah, with some ballsy-ass people out there.

03:00:57.000 Ballsy-ass people.

03:00:58.000 Fucking, yeah, real ballsy.

03:01:00.000 You find an island in the middle of the ocean is a bunch of cool-ass people living on it.

03:01:05.000 And the thing is, when you take off, you don't know where you're going.

03:01:09.000 Right.

03:01:10.000 And how you'll survive when you get there.

03:01:12.000 See, talk about people that are in touch with nature.

03:01:15.000 People that live in Hawaii.

03:01:18.000 You're very vulnerable out there.

03:01:21.000 Isolated.

03:01:22.000 Any other nature people fascinate me.

03:01:24.000 People at home, out in the wilderness.

03:01:27.000 Yeah.

03:01:28.000 Yeah, because they're right.

03:01:29.000 You know, the doomsday prepping people?

03:01:32.000 They're right.

03:01:32.000 They're just not right right now.

03:01:33.000 Right, exactly.

03:01:34.000 But it's coming to an end at some point.

03:01:36.000 It might not even be why they're alive.

03:01:38.000 But...

03:01:40.000 Those are going to be the people you're looking for.

03:01:41.000 You watch Last of Us?

03:01:42.000 Yes.

03:01:43.000 It's like, remember the old gay man with the shelter?

03:01:45.000 It's like, yeah, if the apocalypse comes, they're going to be sitting pretty.

03:01:49.000 Yeah.

03:01:49.000 Yeah, and the rest of us are going to be like, why if I... Yeah, but then those people go after those people.

03:01:55.000 Oh, well, yeah.

03:01:56.000 People who weren't prepared.

03:01:56.000 They try to find the people that aren't prepared.

03:01:59.000 What's interesting is preppers, a lot of times, get lumped into terrorists.

03:02:02.000 They get labeled.

03:02:04.000 There's this guy, Mike Glover, who's been on my show, who runs this company, Fieldcraft Survival, and he teaches preparedness for all kinds of different things.

03:02:13.000 But they had him labeled.

03:02:14.000 They had him on the list.

03:02:16.000 Like an extremist list.

03:02:18.000 Because he's just telling people, like, if society collapses, like, he's a special operations soldier.

03:02:25.000 Well, there's probably some crossover between the two communities, you know?

03:02:29.000 Because, you know, it's already so few of you.

03:02:32.000 I would imagine if you're like...

03:02:34.000 Somebody walked up and was like, hey, fucking John is in the Klan.

03:02:36.000 He's like, just don't bring up race around John.

03:02:39.000 You know what I mean?

03:02:40.000 He's one of our best preppers.

03:02:42.000 I don't think they're talking about that.

03:02:44.000 I think they're talking about people that want to overthrow the government.

03:02:47.000 Oh, like, okay, so I get what you're saying.

03:02:48.000 It's like people that want the society collapse are mixed in with the people that are preparing just for if it does.

03:02:54.000 Yeah.

03:02:55.000 Right.

03:02:55.000 And the worry is that...

03:02:57.000 Well, from the Prepper's perspective, the people that are into that would say, like, I don't trust the government not trusting me, because what they don't trust me is that if the shit goes down, they go full totalitarian, they know we're armed to the tits, and they don't like it.

03:03:11.000 Plus, we have food, we have water, we can fucking, we can huddle down and fight them off.

03:03:20.000 That's what they think, I would imagine.

03:03:22.000 And just espousing that puts you on a watch list.

03:03:26.000 Or even if it was like zombie shit or some disease.

03:03:30.000 Like, bro, you know, and I might just be talking my ass.

03:03:34.000 Correct me if I'm wrong, please, Jamie.

03:03:36.000 But the premise of Last of Us was that that one fungus that...

03:03:40.000 Cordyceps.

03:03:41.000 Cordyceps, it couldn't infect humans.

03:03:43.000 Right.

03:03:43.000 And then it did, right?

03:03:44.000 And now it has in real life.

03:03:47.000 Has it really?

03:03:48.000 I just read this like a couple weeks ago.

03:03:50.000 Am I wrong, Jamie?

03:03:52.000 It has infected a human now.

03:03:54.000 Really?

03:03:55.000 Yeah.

03:03:55.000 Now, obviously, I don't know if it can mind control a human.

03:03:58.000 Because you'd probably die before it could take over your whole mind, because our minds are way bigger than, you know, bugs.

03:04:04.000 But there's things that take over our minds anyway.

03:04:06.000 There's toxoplasmosis, which you actually get from cats.

03:04:09.000 You might have that.

03:04:10.000 Well, there was a pussy plant out there.

03:04:12.000 From your wild cat, you probably have it.

03:04:14.000 You probably have toxo.

03:04:15.000 Oh, for sure.

03:04:17.000 Just from being exposed to cats' feces?

03:04:19.000 Yeah.

03:04:20.000 Yeah, that bitch, yeah.

03:04:21.000 She rubs her butthole and everything.

03:04:22.000 Not only that, she's out there with rats and all sorts of things.

03:04:25.000 Who knows what she's killing and eating out there?

03:04:26.000 Yeah, I think it makes you love them, right?

03:04:28.000 Well, what it does with rats is it makes them sexually attracted to smell of cat urine.

03:04:33.000 Okay.

03:04:34.000 They literally lose their ability to be afraid of cats and then they get hard.

03:04:38.000 Like thinking about cat piss.

03:04:40.000 So they get aroused.

03:04:42.000 So they literally seek out the cats.

03:04:44.000 And then the cats kill them and eat them and toxoplasmosis actually multiplies inside a cat's gut.

03:04:52.000 Could cordyceps fungi infect humans?

03:04:55.000 Cordyceps opiocordyceps are types of fungi that typically infect insects.

03:05:02.000 Fictional works have explored cordyceps infections in humans, but this fungus is not likely to evolve to cause infection in humans in the near future.

03:05:10.000 However, cases of fungal infection may be increasing with climate change.

03:05:14.000 This is recently.

03:05:16.000 Did I speak out of my ass?

03:05:17.000 Uh-oh.

03:05:17.000 Misinformation.

03:05:18.000 No worries.

03:05:19.000 It happens.

03:05:19.000 Hold on.

03:05:21.000 I know I'm not trippin', though.

03:05:22.000 Let me see what I'll say.

03:05:23.000 You know what scares me is rabies.

03:05:26.000 Oh, yeah, well...

03:05:27.000 Rabies is wild.

03:05:28.000 You hear about, like, the accounts of, like, settlers trying to make their way across the country that encountered animals with rabies and the way they died?

03:05:36.000 Rabies is wild because it infects animals and makes them want to bite you to give you rabies.

03:05:42.000 Every time I hear somebody tell me they got bit by a wild animal and they didn't go to the hospital, I'm like, are you crazy?

03:05:48.000 Are you out of your fucking mind?

03:05:49.000 Because once you start showing symptoms of rabies, you already did.

03:05:52.000 You don't have much time.

03:05:53.000 I think you have to get to the hospital and get treatment within 24 hours.

03:05:57.000 I think it's pretty close.

03:05:58.000 Yeah, you can't rest on it.

03:05:59.000 Yeah, I know a dude that was telling me a story about someone who got nicked by a bat.

03:06:05.000 Like, there was bats under a bridge, and the bat, you know, they're flying, they're all flying, and he got nicked on his hand.

03:06:11.000 He died of fucking rabies.

03:06:13.000 Just a nick?

03:06:14.000 Yeah, see if you can find that.

03:06:16.000 Guy gets nicked from a bat, dies of rabies.

03:06:20.000 Yeah, like, nicked his hand, I think.

03:06:23.000 And he's like, oh, what the fuck is that?

03:06:25.000 Thought nothing of it, you know?

03:06:26.000 Thing just flew by.

03:06:27.000 Maybe he didn't even feel it.

03:06:29.000 You know, maybe he didn't even notice.

03:06:30.000 You know, there's a bunch of bats around you like, Jesus!

03:06:32.000 Oh, man, that's such a...

03:06:34.000 Yeah.

03:06:34.000 That's another fear.

03:06:35.000 Infected bat ran into the hand of B.C. Man, who later died from rabies.

03:06:40.000 Suffering a small puncture wound in rare daylight encounter this spring.

03:06:45.000 Wow.

03:06:45.000 Damn, he's 21 years old.

03:06:47.000 Crazy, man.

03:06:49.000 Crazy.

03:06:50.000 And he didn't go to the hospital?

03:06:51.000 I don't know.

03:06:52.000 I said he developed symptoms of rabies six weeks later.

03:06:55.000 Yeah, bro.

03:06:56.000 You gotta get, cause once the symptoms kick in, you dead.

03:06:59.000 You can't, nothing you can do.

03:07:01.000 If you get bit by a wild animal, you got to go to the hospital that night.

03:07:06.000 Immediately.

03:07:07.000 Not crazy.

03:07:07.000 He didn't even know.

03:07:08.000 I would lie at the hospital.

03:07:10.000 Because if you tell them you're having chest pains, they'll see you right away.

03:07:12.000 Imagine you're feeling like shit and you have to think back to six weeks ago where a bat grazed you.

03:07:17.000 I'm having chest pains.

03:07:18.000 I got bit by a bat.

03:07:20.000 Checking me out for everything.

03:07:22.000 Yeah.

03:07:23.000 Hell yeah.

03:07:23.000 Because they do triage.

03:07:26.000 At most emergency rooms, meaning they don't see you in the order you came in, they see you in what they think is the most serious.

03:07:32.000 Right, so you gotta say something's really wrong.

03:07:34.000 Yeah, unless you're bleeding out or you having chest pains, it's not serious.

03:07:39.000 You might be sitting there for four, five, six, seven hours.

03:07:42.000 You gotta fake a stroke.

03:07:43.000 You just gotta say you're having chest pains.

03:07:45.000 I'm just getting dizzy.

03:07:45.000 I'm blocking out my chest pains.

03:07:46.000 Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't do that.

03:07:48.000 If I thought something serious was wrong, I would lie about having chest pains.

03:07:53.000 I have no shame on my guy.

03:07:54.000 Yeah, that's a good move.

03:07:56.000 Yeah, yeah.

03:07:56.000 You gotta get in there, especially if you think it might be rabies.

03:07:58.000 I stray Fred Sanford in there.

03:08:00.000 I'm coming home, Elizabeth!

03:08:02.000 Right?

03:08:05.000 Everybody forgot about that.

03:08:06.000 Yeah.

03:08:07.000 That's a great show, man.

03:08:08.000 Because I did it before.

03:08:09.000 I went to the emergency room.

03:08:09.000 I was having chest pains.

03:08:12.000 And I remember the...

03:08:14.000 It was on the 4th of July.

03:08:16.000 And I remember the dude taking my vitals and stuff.

03:08:19.000 He was like, how old are you?

03:08:20.000 I was like, 40. And he was like...

03:08:22.000 And just walked away.

03:08:24.000 I was the only person in there.

03:08:27.000 They saw me right away.

03:08:28.000 He laughed?

03:08:29.000 He laughed.

03:08:30.000 That you were having a heart attack at 40?

03:08:32.000 Yeah, he laughed.

03:08:33.000 What a piece of shit.

03:08:34.000 I know, right?

03:08:35.000 Wow.

03:08:36.000 He took my vitals and was like, what's wrong?

03:08:37.000 I was like, chest pains.

03:08:38.000 He was like, for real?

03:08:39.000 I was like, yep.

03:08:39.000 I was like, all right.

03:08:41.000 Walked off.

03:08:41.000 Wow.

03:08:42.000 I know.

03:08:42.000 The doctor was pissed when I told him that.

03:08:45.000 But he was like, it's just unlikely that there's anything wrong with you.

03:08:47.000 It turned out to just be gas.

03:08:49.000 It's real bad gas.

03:08:50.000 Oh my god, dude.

03:08:50.000 How bad's your gas?

03:08:52.000 That particular time it was just real bad.

03:08:55.000 You went to the doctor for gas.

03:08:57.000 Yeah.

03:08:58.000 Like it hurt real bad.

03:09:00.000 Wow.

03:09:01.000 Like you were really thinking you were having a heart attack.

03:09:03.000 Oh yeah.

03:09:03.000 Well the thing is, the VA has like a tele-nurse.

03:09:07.000 So if you call a nurse and say your symptoms, they'll tell you what you need to do, whether you go to the hospital or they'll make an appointment for you.

03:09:14.000 But if you say you're having chest pains, they're going to make you go to the hospital.

03:09:18.000 No matter what the fuck is going on.

03:09:20.000 So they're like, best not to risk it.

03:09:23.000 So it probably wasn't the type of pain that would be signal a heart attack.

03:09:27.000 But it was like, she didn't know that and I didn't know how to describe it to her better.

03:09:31.000 So she was like, just go just in case.

03:09:33.000 You don't want to go to an emergency room just in case.

03:09:35.000 But I would if I got bit by an animal.

03:09:37.000 Yeah, for sure.

03:09:38.000 You know?

03:09:39.000 Yeah, you got to be careful.

03:09:41.000 You can't fuck around.

03:09:42.000 You don't want to die and wish you had gone.

03:09:44.000 Right.

03:09:44.000 Chest pain or animal attacks, it's a must go.

03:09:47.000 Yeah.

03:09:47.000 Yeah, no matter what's going to cost you, going to debt, just don't pay it.

03:09:52.000 You know?

03:09:53.000 I'd rather be alive and in severe debt than dead because I didn't go to the doctor.

03:09:57.000 Oh, yeah.

03:09:58.000 100%.

03:09:58.000 Yeah.

03:09:59.000 Medical bills are fucking crazy.

03:10:01.000 It's kind of insane.

03:10:04.000 It's very, very, very much insane.

03:10:06.000 I didn't really understand until the pandemic.

03:10:09.000 I never looked into the healthcare system in terms of how many hospitals are private.

03:10:15.000 Most of them.

03:10:16.000 Yeah, they're businesses.

03:10:17.000 And then the public ones are dangerous.

03:10:21.000 Everyone in every city, they can tell you the hospital that you don't want to go to.

03:10:27.000 My mom, she's going to probably be mad at me talking about this.

03:10:31.000 My mom had a heart attack recently, and like, you know, within the last year.

03:10:35.000 And she drove herself to the hospital because she lives in D.C., but it's right there on the border with PG County, Maryland.

03:10:45.000 And so it was because she knew if she called 911, they would take her to the bad hospital.

03:10:50.000 So she drove herself to the hospital so she could go to the good one.

03:10:53.000 Oh, my God.

03:10:54.000 Yeah.

03:10:55.000 It's like that out here.

03:10:56.000 The public hospital is fucking trash.

03:11:00.000 I saw a video of a kid who is one of the worst fractures of an ankle I've ever seen.

03:11:05.000 And he's in the passenger seat being driven to the hospital.

03:11:09.000 In the passenger seat of what?

03:11:11.000 To his friend's car.

03:11:12.000 Yeah, that's probably faster than taking someone in an ankle.

03:11:15.000 Yeah, but he's just, I mean...

03:11:17.000 Jesus Christ.

03:11:18.000 I don't know what else you do, obviously, but...

03:11:19.000 Do you get leeway if you're trapping somebody to the hospital?

03:11:22.000 Like, say you're speeding or something and they pull you over?

03:11:24.000 If the cops are listening to you, you said my friend's got a broken ankle, the cops will probably give you a police escort.

03:11:29.000 Yeah, they probably got a broken ankle.

03:11:31.000 I mean, if it sounds pretty bad, like bone through the skin and shit, blood everywhere.

03:11:36.000 But is there some kind of signal you can give where, like, I'm not slowing down, I can't stop?

03:11:40.000 Cops should never listen.

03:11:40.000 Because they have to follow you anyway just to make sure it's true.

03:11:42.000 Otherwise you're just a psycho just speeding around.

03:11:45.000 Oh, right.

03:11:45.000 Saying you're pregnant.

03:11:46.000 I was like, you gotta beat me to the hospital.

03:11:47.000 I'm giving birth, sir.

03:11:49.000 Yeah?

03:11:50.000 Excuse me?

03:11:51.000 Oh, yeah.

03:11:52.000 I wonder what happens if a cop pulls someone over and they say, I'm giving birth now, and it's a guy.

03:11:55.000 You have to let it slide.

03:11:57.000 A cop let one of my cousins get away with just pissing on the side of the road.

03:12:01.000 Oh.

03:12:02.000 Because he pulled him up.

03:12:03.000 I was like, why are you speeding?

03:12:04.000 He's like, I got to piss so bad.

03:12:05.000 He got out of the car and ran off him.

03:12:08.000 Sometimes you got to go.

03:12:09.000 Yeah.

03:12:10.000 Yeah, we've all been there.

03:12:11.000 Did you see this story?

03:12:12.000 What's this one?

03:12:12.000 This is in Florida.

03:12:13.000 There's a...

03:12:14.000 Oh, a deputy pulled another deputy over.

03:12:16.000 Yeah, I thought it was a stolen car, but it was not.

03:12:18.000 He was just saying, I'm on my way to work.

03:12:19.000 He's like, well, why are you going?

03:12:21.000 He's going 85 in a 45. He just walks off.

03:12:24.000 Yeah, because I think technically...

03:12:27.000 Because cops don't follow the same traffic code, but I think if you're not on shift, just because you're in a cop car, you can't speed.

03:12:36.000 You have to be going to a scene.

03:12:38.000 Or you just have to be on patrol.

03:12:39.000 Yeah, but you're still not allowed to speed.

03:12:42.000 You're not supposed to speed unless you're chasing someone.

03:12:44.000 If you're going to a scene of a crime, interesting.

03:12:48.000 I think I got fired for that.

03:12:50.000 I gotta wrap this up.

03:12:51.000 Brian, we got a show in an hour and a half.

03:12:53.000 No, two hours.

03:12:54.000 Yeah, yeah.

03:12:55.000 We got several shows.

03:12:56.000 Yeah.

03:12:57.000 Yeehaw.

03:12:58.000 Let's go.

03:12:58.000 Living the life.

03:12:59.000 Living the dream.

03:13:00.000 All right, brother.

03:13:00.000 We're having fun.

03:13:00.000 Yeah, man.

03:13:01.000 Thanks for having me on.

03:13:02.000 My pleasure.

03:13:02.000 Don't forget to follow the podcast BS with Brian Simpson.

03:13:05.000 B.S. with Brian Simpson, B.S. Comedian on Instagram and on Twitter.

03:13:09.000 And Denver and New York in July.

03:13:11.000 And filming at the Mothership in August.

03:13:14.000 Oh, wait a minute.

03:13:15.000 Also, one thing I've got to plug.

03:13:16.000 We're doing a fundraising show at the Mothership.

03:13:20.000 Week after July 4th for the...

03:13:22.000 How good is the McVader?

03:13:24.000 He's the best.

03:13:25.000 Oh, he is the best.

03:13:26.000 He's so good at these.

03:13:27.000 This came out to haunt me because Miami got fucked up.

03:13:30.000 But yeah, we're hosting a fundraiser for the Veterans Hearts Project, which treats veterans with psychedelics.

03:13:36.000 What night is that up?

03:13:37.000 It's the following Tuesday, the 4th of July.

03:13:40.000 So what is that?

03:13:40.000 The 11th?

03:13:41.000 Okay.

03:13:42.000 Beautiful.

03:13:42.000 All right.

03:13:43.000 Bye, everybody.

03:13:43.000 Bye, y'all.

The Joe Rogan Experience - July 11, 2023

Joe Rogan Experience #2006 - Brian Simpson

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