The Joe Rogan Experience - July 12, 2023


Joe Rogan Experience #2007 - Adrienne Iapalucci


Episode Stats

Length

2 hours and 25 minutes

Words per Minute

196.77055

Word Count

28,617

Sentence Count

3,311

Misogynist Sentences

95

Hate Speech Sentences

33


Summary

In this episode of Thick & Thin, the boys talk about Ari Shafir, Bert Kreischer, and why they think he might have been doped with Molly. Also, they talk about the time Ari's ex-fianc wrote a love letter to his ex-wife, and how she was mad at him for it. And they discuss the time that Ari accidentally sent a dick pic to their ex-partner, and the time he accidentally sent it to her ex-boyfriend, who was on drugs at the time. They also talk about how they think Bert might have doped up on Molly at his house with his family, and what it was like to be doped by someone who was supposed to be hanging out with them that night. And, of course, there's a story about how Bert almost got into trouble with the law. with his own wife. Also, the guys talk about what they would do if they were in a relationship with someone they were on drugs, and whether or not it would be a good or bad thing. And, you guessed it, it's a good thing they're not on drugs. Just pay them a visit to the bar and listen to them talk about it. Enjoy the episode, and don't forget to leave us a rating and review on Apple Podcasts! if you like what you're listening to this podcast. Have a question or a suggestion for our next episode? harrison@whatiwatched this episode? hl=en=a&t=1&q=3&q&qid=8&qw&qref=8q=9&q_t=7&qq=5&qb=3 We'll see you next week! Thank you so much for listening to Thick&q%20&qx&qn=2&qr=1s&qk=1a&q &qx=3s=3d&qf=3c&qd=3S&qm&qh=3b&qt=3f&qc=3r&ql=3D&qs=1e&qz&qg=3a=3M&qA&qQ&qp=3m&t&qj&qzn=3t=4s=2 I hope you enjoy this episode!


Transcript

00:00:11.000 I know these chairs are kind of weird, but they're the fucking best chairs that I've ever found for sitting for long hours at a time.
00:00:18.000 I like it.
00:00:19.000 It's called a Capisco, and is it Fully?
00:00:22.000 What's the name of the company that makes them?
00:00:24.000 They're the shit.
00:00:25.000 The best ergonomic chairs I've ever had.
00:00:27.000 They're the only...
00:00:28.000 For podcasting.
00:00:29.000 Because if you think you want to be, like, comfortable in, like, a nice, like, one of those cool chairs with the buttons in it, you know, that people would sit and smoke cigars, after a while, your back would hurt.
00:00:39.000 It's like, you don't really...
00:00:40.000 You have to kind of stay upright.
00:00:42.000 That makes sense.
00:00:44.000 These are the best.
00:00:45.000 I like it.
00:00:46.000 The other one was just, like, so tall.
00:00:48.000 Yeah, there's some of these.
00:00:49.000 It's weird because they're the same company or the same chair, but I think different people made them, and some of them get real low.
00:00:56.000 This one doesn't get very low.
00:00:57.000 HAG is the main company, I guess.
00:01:00.000 Oh, so they've changed, like, twice.
00:01:02.000 And a few people sell it.
00:01:03.000 Oh, well, that's the shit.
00:01:04.000 That's how it works.
00:01:06.000 No one's paying me to say that.
00:01:07.000 Do the shit.
00:01:09.000 What's up, Adrian?
00:01:10.000 How you doing?
00:01:11.000 Good to see you.
00:01:12.000 Should I move this closer?
00:01:13.000 Yeah, right there is good.
00:01:14.000 You want some coffee?
00:01:15.000 I just had some coffee.
00:01:17.000 Last night was really fun.
00:01:18.000 It was really fun.
00:01:19.000 The club's awesome.
00:01:20.000 Thank you very much.
00:01:22.000 I'm really excited that we got to meet, and I'm really excited that I got to see your stand-up, you know, because Ari Shafir has been singing your praises for so long.
00:01:30.000 I know.
00:01:30.000 He's the best.
00:01:31.000 He loves you.
00:01:32.000 I know.
00:01:33.000 When I first met him, I did not like him.
00:01:36.000 Like, I was like, this guy's a dick.
00:01:39.000 He's a little misunderstood.
00:01:41.000 He can be a dick.
00:01:42.000 Well, yeah, even when you text me, I was like, is this Ari playing a joke?
00:01:46.000 Because he's always doing stuff like that to me.
00:01:48.000 Does he really?
00:01:49.000 Yeah.
00:01:50.000 Well, it's because he loves you.
00:01:51.000 No, absolutely.
00:01:52.000 But I'm always skeptical if something's in his orbit.
00:01:55.000 Right.
00:01:55.000 I'm like, hmm.
00:01:56.000 He is the guy that dosed Bert Kreischer at his house.
00:02:00.000 Yes.
00:02:01.000 Dosed him at his house when he was supposed to be hanging out with his family.
00:02:04.000 He gave him Molly.
00:02:04.000 At least he did it at his house in a safe environment, I guess.
00:02:08.000 I think Bert had the fucking time of his life.
00:02:09.000 He just doesn't want to admit it.
00:02:11.000 I could see that.
00:02:12.000 I think, ultimately, it was a really bad thing that Ari did that.
00:02:16.000 But I bet he had a good time.
00:02:19.000 I'm sure.
00:02:20.000 I mean, yeah, I think it's probably not great for their friendship.
00:02:23.000 It was terrible for their friendship.
00:02:25.000 The wife was furious at them, and rightly so.
00:02:28.000 Rightly so.
00:02:29.000 Ari does stuff where you're like, hey, that's not cool.
00:02:34.000 Do you know what he did to me?
00:02:36.000 So he got into my ex-fiance's computer, wrote an email from him to me.
00:02:44.000 Oh, God.
00:02:45.000 Where it was like, I'm still in love with you.
00:02:47.000 We should get back together.
00:02:48.000 Oh, my God.
00:02:48.000 I know.
00:02:49.000 And I was like, I had another boyfriend at the time.
00:02:51.000 And I was like, I don't feel like this at all.
00:02:52.000 So I just deleted it.
00:02:54.000 And then Ari later was like, you check your emails.
00:02:57.000 I was like, you're a dick.
00:02:58.000 Yeah.
00:02:58.000 Oh my god, what a psycho.
00:03:00.000 Yeah, I was like, what if I still cared about this guy like that?
00:03:03.000 What if you just started sending pussy pictures?
00:03:04.000 Oh my god, yeah.
00:03:06.000 What if I was like, it's on, come over.
00:03:08.000 What if I was like, it's on, and you started sending the wildest shit that you have on your hard drive?
00:03:12.000 Oh my god, that would be terrible.
00:03:13.000 I know.
00:03:14.000 And then Ari has it?
00:03:15.000 Then he texts it to you later?
00:03:17.000 I think that he got in his email and then left.
00:03:21.000 Like, that's the thing.
00:03:22.000 I've had my phone open by him and he'll write, I love black cock on Twitter.
00:03:26.000 Like, he just does that.
00:03:27.000 Could you imagine being your ex-fiance and then seeing a response to you in his email?
00:03:34.000 Yeah.
00:03:35.000 And then he's reading that and going, what the fuck did I do?
00:03:38.000 Right.
00:03:39.000 Like, he thinks, oh my God, was I on drugs?
00:03:40.000 Did I black out?
00:03:41.000 I don't remember writing this.
00:03:43.000 I think he would just...
00:03:44.000 I think at this point anything that goes crazy I think is Ari.
00:03:46.000 So I think he would also just be like, who is in my office?
00:03:52.000 Well, that's the benefit of having someone like Ari.
00:03:54.000 You have plausible deniability.
00:03:56.000 Sure.
00:03:56.000 On tap.
00:03:57.000 You're just like...
00:03:57.000 Fucking Ari.
00:03:58.000 It's Ari.
00:03:59.000 Ari did it.
00:03:59.000 He's such a psycho.
00:04:00.000 It's Ari.
00:04:01.000 God damn it.
00:04:02.000 Damn it, Ari.
00:04:03.000 He comes across sometimes as a dick because he's probably autistic, but he is a good guy.
00:04:09.000 He's a great guy.
00:04:10.000 He is.
00:04:10.000 I love that dude.
00:04:11.000 But I don't think he's autistic.
00:04:13.000 I think he just had a hard childhood.
00:04:15.000 Yeah, but I don't think he...
00:04:17.000 He'll say stuff where you're like, Ari, this is really inappropriate.
00:04:21.000 He does.
00:04:22.000 So that's the only thing where I'm like, he might be on the spectrum.
00:04:27.000 You don't think even like the tail end, like the beginning?
00:04:30.000 I think he's such a comedian that he has a really hard time interacting with regular people.
00:04:37.000 Maybe.
00:04:37.000 I think he's so used to like the fun of chaos.
00:04:41.000 Ari shit in a Tupperware container and brought it to Skankfest.
00:04:45.000 Yeah.
00:04:46.000 And then opened it up on stage in a crowded room where people were gagging and throwing up.
00:04:52.000 It was legions of skanks, right?
00:04:53.000 It wasn't Skankfest.
00:04:54.000 Was it Skankfest?
00:04:55.000 Whatever it was.
00:04:56.000 With the Legion of Skanks guys, Ari shit in a Tupperware and brought it to the stage.
00:05:03.000 Sure, but that's still not as bad as some of the stuff he says.
00:05:06.000 But that's his level of, like, acceptable behavior.
00:05:11.000 Like, to him, that was a thing that you should do.
00:05:13.000 Right.
00:05:14.000 Right?
00:05:14.000 So, like, all this other stuff is just funsies.
00:05:16.000 That's true.
00:05:17.000 It's just funsies.
00:05:18.000 When I was on the road with him one time, he took out one of his bloody-ass tampons.
00:05:23.000 And he was showing me, I go, don't touch me with that.
00:05:25.000 And he goes, okay.
00:05:26.000 Like, if you ask him, like, not to do something, he will respect that.
00:05:29.000 But if you don't, it's game on.
00:05:30.000 He might be game on.
00:05:32.000 Yeah.
00:05:33.000 He'll do whatever.
00:05:34.000 But if you're like, hey, please don't do that, he's like, all right, I'll respect that because you said that.
00:05:37.000 I met Ari when he was a door guy at the Comedy Store.
00:05:40.000 We became friends when he was just really just starting out.
00:05:44.000 I don't think he'd been doing comedy more than a year.
00:05:47.000 What did you think of him as a new comic?
00:05:50.000 He's funny.
00:05:51.000 I knew he was really smart.
00:05:52.000 Yeah.
00:05:54.000 And...
00:05:55.000 He was just fun to be around.
00:05:57.000 He was a fun kid.
00:05:59.000 I knew after a while what was going on, but he was recently divorced from religion.
00:06:06.000 Right.
00:06:07.000 So he was super orthodox.
00:06:09.000 Jew, went to Israel, was studying the Talmud for 12 hours a day.
00:06:15.000 Wild shit.
00:06:16.000 And then he has this real break from it.
00:06:19.000 And then a few years later, he's hanging out without smoking weed at the comedy store.
00:06:23.000 I wonder what he was like.
00:06:24.000 He was great!
00:06:25.000 No, no, before, when he was, like, religious.
00:06:29.000 What a mindfuck to do to a kid.
00:06:32.000 It's such a mindfuck.
00:06:34.000 Because you're saying you absolutely know that this is how everything went down.
00:06:39.000 Right.
00:06:39.000 And there's no way that could be real.
00:06:41.000 Even if the concepts of Christianity or Judaism, even if they're real, that's what God really wants, there's no way you know whoever wrote that, what they wrote.
00:06:53.000 There's no way.
00:06:54.000 This is human beings.
00:06:55.000 Yeah, I mean, I went to Catholic school my whole life, and I just never believed any of that stuff.
00:07:00.000 I believed in it until I was six.
00:07:02.000 Yeah, okay, six.
00:07:02.000 In first grade, I had one teacher, Sister Mary Josephine.
00:07:06.000 She was such a cunt.
00:07:07.000 I bet.
00:07:08.000 She was so mean.
00:07:09.000 She was so mean that I knew as a little boy...
00:07:12.000 There's no way this could be connected to God.
00:07:15.000 No.
00:07:16.000 They're so mean.
00:07:17.000 This is an evil lady who would threaten you.
00:07:20.000 If you didn't do something, you were going to have to sleep on a nail in the closet.
00:07:24.000 You'd have to stay home.
00:07:25.000 You're never going to get to see your parents again.
00:07:27.000 She would yell stuff like that.
00:07:28.000 It was like she was evil.
00:07:30.000 She tortured kids.
00:07:31.000 Can you imagine that existing today?
00:07:33.000 Yeah.
00:07:33.000 Oh, my God.
00:07:34.000 It probably does.
00:07:35.000 It probably does in some very unusual religious circumstances.
00:07:40.000 You know?
00:07:41.000 It's just back then, when I was a kid, that was how they taught you in Catholic school, at least that lady.
00:07:45.000 My sister got a great lady, though.
00:07:47.000 My sister got a lady in the same school that wasn't a nun.
00:07:52.000 She was just a regular lady who was Catholic, who was teaching in a Catholic school.
00:07:56.000 It didn't have to be nuns or priests.
00:07:58.000 Right.
00:07:58.000 Well, I was in elementary school.
00:08:01.000 It was like some teachers and then I was some nuns and some priests.
00:08:04.000 So it was a mix.
00:08:05.000 Yeah.
00:08:05.000 So my sister got lucky.
00:08:07.000 She loved her teacher.
00:08:08.000 My teacher.
00:08:08.000 She taught me everything I needed to know.
00:08:11.000 I was like...
00:08:12.000 About religion?
00:08:13.000 I was like, there's no way.
00:08:14.000 Not about...
00:08:15.000 It's just a possibility that someone like that exists.
00:08:18.000 Yeah.
00:08:19.000 Everyone was nice to me.
00:08:20.000 I was five, six years old, whatever I was.
00:08:23.000 My parents were nice to me.
00:08:24.000 My grandparents were nice to me.
00:08:25.000 Everyone was nice to me.
00:08:27.000 And then all of a sudden I'm in this room with this lady who is representing God and she's fucking evil.
00:08:34.000 She's mean.
00:08:35.000 She wants you to cry.
00:08:37.000 She would like try to get kids to cry.
00:08:40.000 Yeah.
00:08:40.000 It was weird because it was like a really good thing.
00:08:44.000 It was like a really good thing because when I was like five years old, my parents were breaking up and I was like, you know, when you're young and you're insecure, you're like, oh my God, like there's no stability in the world.
00:08:55.000 And I started thinking about God and I started like really getting into God.
00:08:59.000 It's like a five year old.
00:09:00.000 That's crazy.
00:09:01.000 Yeah, it was like I was looking for someone...
00:09:04.000 But it makes sense.
00:09:05.000 Yeah, you're looking for someone to look after you.
00:09:08.000 Someone who makes sense of this.
00:09:10.000 Sure.
00:09:10.000 Because if the parents in your life, if the chaos in your life, you're like, there's got to be something, maybe it's God.
00:09:15.000 And then going to that church and going to that Catholic school, I was like, okay, maybe, maybe it's God, but these people, this lady is not doing the work of God.
00:09:26.000 Like, there's no way God knows about this.
00:09:28.000 There's no way God's cool with this.
00:09:30.000 There's no way God's like, she's ultimately, unless it's to be so fucking mean that you make people think for themselves.
00:09:36.000 Yeah.
00:09:37.000 We had a priest, maybe Father Joe.
00:09:40.000 I don't know.
00:09:41.000 He came and we were about seventh grade and people were talking about like if their dogs die and they go to heaven.
00:09:47.000 And he was like, they don't.
00:09:48.000 And we went ballistic.
00:09:49.000 Oh my God.
00:09:50.000 Imagine telling like a seventh grader your dog dies and doesn't go to heaven.
00:09:53.000 Oh my God.
00:09:54.000 We were just like so angry and mad.
00:09:57.000 Like he had to leave the room.
00:09:58.000 First of all, bitch, how do you know?
00:10:00.000 They don't know anything.
00:10:01.000 How do you know?
00:10:01.000 But I'm just saying, it's like, just be like, yeah, of course.
00:10:03.000 Yeah.
00:10:05.000 Yeah, why wouldn't you say that?
00:10:06.000 No.
00:10:07.000 He never even was like, well, maybe.
00:10:09.000 He was like, no, they do not go to heaven.
00:10:11.000 Because then you'd be trapped with this animals have souls too thing, and then you can never eat meat again.
00:10:16.000 Right.
00:10:17.000 Cows go to heaven.
00:10:18.000 Yeah, they all go to heaven.
00:10:20.000 Or whatever.
00:10:21.000 Imagine if you had to go to heaven and confront every chicken you ever ate.
00:10:26.000 I mean, I would just probably ignore them.
00:10:28.000 Like you do on, like trolls on the internet.
00:10:30.000 You're just like, all right, I get it.
00:10:32.000 You're mad.
00:10:33.000 I said something that pissed you off.
00:10:34.000 Imagine in the next dimension if reality was flopped and everything that you ate gets to eat you.
00:10:41.000 I mean, I think you're just like, this is my fate.
00:10:43.000 Like, what am I going to do?
00:10:44.000 It would suck.
00:10:46.000 It would, but you'd be dead so quick.
00:10:48.000 It really is crazy if you think about, like, your whole life.
00:10:51.000 From the time you were a baby to now, how many animals have you eaten?
00:10:55.000 Probably a lot.
00:10:57.000 And the thing is, I don't feel bad eating the ugly animals.
00:11:00.000 Chickens are not particularly cute, but cows are so cute.
00:11:04.000 They can be very cute.
00:11:05.000 So are pigs.
00:11:06.000 Yeah.
00:11:07.000 Pigs can be really cute.
00:11:09.000 So that's the one thing where you're like, oh, I love all these videos on Instagram, but I'm still going to eat a steak.
00:11:14.000 Isn't it interesting that wild pigs aren't cute at all?
00:11:17.000 No.
00:11:18.000 They're not even a little cute.
00:11:20.000 They're ferocious looking.
00:11:21.000 Yeah, so those are the ones that you want to eat.
00:11:23.000 The ugly ones.
00:11:25.000 Yeah, my agent said the same thing to me.
00:11:27.000 To eat the ugly ones?
00:11:28.000 Yeah, she's like, I don't mind if you hunt, but you should hunt pigs because they're ugly.
00:11:32.000 Not the babies.
00:11:33.000 The babies are so cute.
00:11:35.000 They are, but even wild pig babies are cute.
00:11:39.000 Isn't that interesting?
00:11:40.000 What's that evolution?
00:11:42.000 It's not like eagles care if something's cute.
00:11:45.000 No.
00:11:45.000 It's like a thinking animal that discerns cuteness and doesn't want to harm cute things.
00:11:50.000 Sure.
00:11:51.000 Like, lions don't care about hunting something.
00:11:54.000 But is that for us?
00:11:56.000 It must be for us.
00:11:57.000 It's just for us.
00:11:57.000 Because it's the only thing it works on.
00:11:59.000 Yeah.
00:11:59.000 I think it's just for us.
00:12:01.000 Like, think about it like a little wolf puppy.
00:12:03.000 They're so adorable.
00:12:05.000 So cute.
00:12:05.000 So adorable.
00:12:06.000 And it's adorable to us.
00:12:08.000 Oh yeah, those things are gross.
00:12:10.000 Disgusting.
00:12:10.000 So it's adorable to us, little wolf puppy.
00:12:13.000 Yeah.
00:12:13.000 So that we don't kill it, so it can grow up to be able to kill us.
00:12:18.000 It's a trick.
00:12:19.000 I think that we just are reasoning and thinking about it, but there's people that would probably kill it still.
00:12:24.000 Oh yeah, for sure.
00:12:25.000 But it's a trick.
00:12:27.000 But it's an interesting one.
00:12:28.000 I think it only works on us.
00:12:31.000 I don't think chimps give a fuck about cuteness.
00:12:33.000 No, but they do love their offspring.
00:12:36.000 Sure, but all animals do.
00:12:37.000 All animals do.
00:12:38.000 But it's not because they're cute.
00:12:39.000 Right, but for us, when we see other things, babies, we think they're cute.
00:12:44.000 Yes.
00:12:45.000 Like we go, oh my god.
00:12:46.000 We want to protect it.
00:12:48.000 Otters are really cute.
00:12:49.000 Yeah, puppies.
00:12:50.000 Puppies are the most adorable thing of all time.
00:12:52.000 They are.
00:12:52.000 Look at those little guys.
00:12:54.000 They are cute.
00:12:55.000 Hey, little woof puppies.
00:12:56.000 But I also realized that they would kill me.
00:12:58.000 They're so different than dogs.
00:13:00.000 It's so interesting.
00:13:01.000 They're so different than dogs.
00:13:04.000 And they look kind of like dogs until you get them around dogs.
00:13:08.000 Yeah.
00:13:09.000 I mean, they're cute, but they're not as cute as like a husky.
00:13:13.000 I was at a dog park once when a guy brought in a wolf.
00:13:17.000 Are they illegal?
00:13:18.000 Yeah, you can have a wolf.
00:13:20.000 In a dog park?
00:13:21.000 Yeah, you can have like a seven-eighth timber wolf as a pet.
00:13:25.000 Yeah.
00:13:25.000 I had a friend who had a couple of them, and one of them even got out and killed a bunch of sheep.
00:13:30.000 Like, they're wolves.
00:13:32.000 Like, real wolves.
00:13:33.000 Yeah, I don't think you should have them as pets.
00:13:35.000 So, I'm at the dog park, and this fucking dude comes in with a wolf.
00:13:38.000 And it was the wildest thing, where every dog was like, What the fuck?
00:13:45.000 Do you know what that is?
00:13:46.000 Every dog was like, oh, Jesus Christ.
00:13:49.000 They all like slunk down and moved away from it.
00:13:52.000 It was like he was walking through a tide.
00:13:55.000 Like everything, it pulled back.
00:13:58.000 That's like their Jesus.
00:13:59.000 In his presence.
00:13:59.000 Well, that's their monster.
00:14:01.000 Yeah.
00:14:01.000 Wolves eat dogs.
00:14:02.000 Was your dog there?
00:14:03.000 Yes.
00:14:04.000 Did you take your dog out?
00:14:05.000 Oh, I got the fuck right the fuck out of there.
00:14:07.000 Yeah.
00:14:08.000 So I live in the Bronx and there's always like people have pit bulls and you know dogs and like some of them are really nice and some of them they just walk off the leash.
00:14:15.000 So this one day I had a boxer and this pit bull got loose.
00:14:19.000 I was with my ex-boyfriend at the time.
00:14:21.000 He jumped on a car and I just picked my dog up.
00:14:24.000 Oh Jesus Christ.
00:14:25.000 I was just getting ready to get.
00:14:26.000 He jumped on the car to get away from the dog?
00:14:28.000 Yes.
00:14:28.000 And left your puppy?
00:14:30.000 Yes, but I think that's also maybe culturally, because he was black, and I think that's a whole thing where he's just not raised the same with dogs and stuff.
00:14:37.000 I don't know, he just jumped on the car and I just held my dog.
00:14:39.000 And I was like, I'm ready to get attacked.
00:14:41.000 Oh my god.
00:14:42.000 The dog did nothing, but then he showed me how, because I was like, I'm scared to walk my dog now, so he showed me how I could kill a dog, and I would walk around with a knife.
00:14:51.000 Oh my god.
00:14:52.000 Did you see that?
00:14:53.000 Someone did that to someone.
00:14:54.000 Welcome back.
00:14:56.000 In Manhattan.
00:14:57.000 What?
00:14:58.000 In Central Park.
00:14:59.000 Someone stabbed, two dogs got in a fight and the guy stabbed someone else's dog.
00:15:04.000 I mean, was he killing the dog?
00:15:06.000 I don't know.
00:15:07.000 I think his dog bit the other dog was what the woman who's...
00:15:12.000 I don't know the details.
00:15:15.000 I probably shouldn't say it.
00:15:16.000 So it's new details and shocking, deadly stabbing of a dog in Central Park.
00:15:21.000 And the woman filmed the guy running away and she goes, you killed my dog, you piece of shit.
00:15:27.000 Baffling incident occurred in the area around 106th Street and 5th Avenue, a spot popular with dog walkers.
00:15:32.000 NBC New York spoke to a man who said that he and his wife were walking their 13-year-old German Shepherd pit bull mix named Ellie and their other dog, Sadie, on leashes in the area around 8.30 p.m.
00:15:43.000 The man who only wished to be identified as Brian said they walked by a man with three pit bulls, at least two of which were unleashed.
00:15:52.000 Fuck that guy.
00:15:53.000 I hate seeing dogs off the leash.
00:15:55.000 One of his dogs tried to bite my little dog, and he tried to tell me that it's okay, and I tried to talk sense into him, Brian told News 4. He and the man started to argue as his dogs attacked Ellie.
00:16:09.000 I kicked one of the dogs off my dog at one point, Brian said, but then he took out a knife and started carving, and my dog growled.
00:16:17.000 He stuck him.
00:16:18.000 And I was helpless at that time.
00:16:20.000 Brian said he took a photo of the man as he walked away below.
00:16:22.000 The couple then took their dog to the veterinarian where Ellie had to be put down.
00:16:28.000 Wow.
00:16:28.000 So that guy with those dogs just stabbed someone's dog.
00:16:33.000 Because his dog bit the dog.
00:16:35.000 Okay.
00:16:36.000 That guy would be fucking dead.
00:16:39.000 That's why I can't have a gun.
00:16:40.000 Because there's so many people I would kill.
00:16:42.000 I don't know if those are pit bulls.
00:16:44.000 They said those are pit bulls.
00:16:45.000 They look like...
00:16:46.000 No, I think they're American bulldogs.
00:16:50.000 My mom has one.
00:16:50.000 No, American bulldogs are actually larger than pit bulls.
00:16:53.000 American bulldogs are big.
00:16:54.000 Those dogs are like this, though.
00:16:55.000 Those.
00:16:56.000 Those look more like...
00:16:57.000 They do make these little bullies.
00:16:59.000 You ever seen those bullies?
00:17:00.000 That's what my mom's dog is.
00:17:01.000 Like miniature bullies?
00:17:02.000 Yeah.
00:17:03.000 It's like low to the ground, but like that.
00:17:04.000 Yeah.
00:17:05.000 It's jacked.
00:17:05.000 I think those aren't like...
00:17:08.000 The really scary pitbulls, believe it or not, are not the ones that look like the scary pitbulls.
00:17:13.000 I mean, those are scary too.
00:17:14.000 But the really scary ones are the smaller ones.
00:17:16.000 Because those are the ones they really raised for dogfighting.
00:17:18.000 Yeah.
00:17:19.000 Brian Callen got one of those ones.
00:17:21.000 He had one as a pet.
00:17:22.000 It was a real problem.
00:17:24.000 And it looked like a regular dog.
00:17:25.000 It looked like a regular dog.
00:17:26.000 Like, they don't have big, giant heads.
00:17:27.000 And it only weighed like 35 pounds.
00:17:29.000 Pocket bullet.
00:17:30.000 That little fucker.
00:17:30.000 That's what my mom has.
00:17:31.000 That's it.
00:17:31.000 So those little things, they're weird fucking...
00:17:37.000 Breeding choices that people have made to make these little tiny pit bulls, but I don't think those are aggressive.
00:17:43.000 My mom's dog's not aggressive, but she's, like, scared of everything.
00:17:47.000 Because another dog got loose and attacked her, so she's, like, scared now of everything.
00:17:50.000 Oh, God.
00:17:50.000 Yeah, that's got to be traumatic to dogs.
00:17:52.000 But, like, if I live...
00:17:53.000 That would drive me nuts if I was that guy.
00:17:55.000 I would do terrible things to his dogs.
00:17:58.000 It's just...
00:17:58.000 It's to him.
00:17:59.000 Fuck.
00:18:00.000 The dogs are just being dogs.
00:18:01.000 I know, but, like, put him on a leash.
00:18:03.000 That's the problem.
00:18:04.000 Yeah, but it's not like...
00:18:05.000 Yeah, I know what you're saying.
00:18:06.000 But yeah.
00:18:07.000 Oh, yeah.
00:18:07.000 If you could kill him, then do it.
00:18:10.000 That's the thing about taking dogs in public.
00:18:12.000 Like, you never know.
00:18:14.000 Like, there's this guy that I used to run these trails with.
00:18:17.000 And I think he worked for this lady because I don't think he really had good control of the dogs.
00:18:22.000 And oddly enough, one of the dogs was a golden lab and he was really aggressive.
00:18:27.000 And he went after my dog and bit my dog.
00:18:31.000 And I had to, like, kick the dog off him.
00:18:33.000 It was awful, but a golden lab just snapped at the dog.
00:18:37.000 And the guy couldn't control him.
00:18:38.000 I thought you were talking about this video.
00:18:40.000 What is this one?
00:18:41.000 Oh, this was horrible!
00:18:43.000 Yeah, that was horrible.
00:18:45.000 Yeah, the guy didn't have control of his dogs, and they were attacking this woman.
00:18:49.000 That's why your dogs need to be on a leash.
00:18:51.000 I mean, that's just crazy.
00:18:52.000 You're not in the mountains.
00:18:53.000 There's a guy that used to have three German shepherds.
00:18:55.000 He'd walk them all off the leash in the Bronx.
00:18:56.000 Right, but why is that dog attacking people?
00:18:58.000 Why is that dog just attacking a lady for no reason?
00:19:01.000 Maybe they're trained?
00:19:02.000 Yeah, what is going on?
00:19:03.000 Or if you rescue them and you don't know where they're from?
00:19:07.000 Goddammit, that's scary.
00:19:08.000 That's very scary.
00:19:09.000 That's terrifying shit.
00:19:11.000 Such a fucked up way to go.
00:19:14.000 Also, that's so weird that that guy came into the park with a wolf.
00:19:17.000 It's like, what are you doing?
00:19:18.000 It was a long time ago.
00:19:20.000 You know, it was...
00:19:23.000 It was real weird.
00:19:25.000 But people have those things.
00:19:27.000 They have those wolf breeds, wolf dogs.
00:19:31.000 There's one guy I knew had three of them, and he would go over his house, if you made noise, like, yo!
00:19:36.000 They would all just howl in.
00:19:40.000 They're not dogs.
00:19:42.000 It's so interesting.
00:19:44.000 They, like, there's no, like, telling them what to do.
00:19:46.000 Sit, lay down.
00:19:47.000 Fuck you.
00:19:48.000 Those dogs should be out in the wild.
00:19:50.000 Yeah.
00:19:50.000 And this guy had them in a yard.
00:19:52.000 It's like...
00:19:53.000 It's kind of crazy.
00:19:54.000 That's not what they should be.
00:19:55.000 No.
00:19:55.000 These dogs are wild.
00:19:56.000 They should be out in, you know...
00:19:57.000 It's also kind of crazy to fix them.
00:20:00.000 You're just cutting off their testosterone supply.
00:20:04.000 I bet they're still pretty aggressive.
00:20:06.000 They're not the same.
00:20:08.000 They're definitely not the same.
00:20:09.000 I mean, I get it that you don't want them to have puppies, but you should just be in control of your dog.
00:20:15.000 It's such a weird animal.
00:20:18.000 Wolves.
00:20:19.000 You know, because we killed them off.
00:20:21.000 And now we're like, let's bring them back.
00:20:22.000 And have them in the park with other dogs that have no fighting chance against if it goes nuts.
00:20:28.000 Well, that case, that guy, you know, had it supposedly as a pet.
00:20:31.000 I just think people get pets sometimes.
00:20:33.000 It's like you don't have to really know what you're doing to get a German Shepherd.
00:20:38.000 You can get a police dog, German Shepherd, like a really aggressive, very smart thinking, like almost like a predator of people.
00:20:48.000 Yeah.
00:20:48.000 And you can just get it.
00:20:50.000 Anybody can get it.
00:20:51.000 I mean, somebody...
00:20:51.000 I think in Manhattan had, like, an alligator.
00:20:54.000 Oh, yeah.
00:20:54.000 Like, you get these, like, little animals where they're cute, and then it, like, gets to be humongous, and you're like, this is a real problem.
00:21:00.000 I think a dude in the Bronx had a tiger.
00:21:02.000 Sure.
00:21:02.000 I see that happening.
00:21:03.000 In his fucking house!
00:21:04.000 This guy had a tiger at his house.
00:21:07.000 Yeah, people are nuts.
00:21:09.000 Imagine, like, telling a girl at a club you have a baby tiger.
00:21:12.000 Like, even if you don't want to fuck this guy, you're like, I do want to see this baby tiger.
00:21:16.000 Where was this?
00:21:18.000 This is this alligator found in New York City Lake?
00:21:21.000 Oh my god!
00:21:22.000 So, what do you think happened there?
00:21:25.000 Do you think that was like a pet?
00:21:26.000 It's probably a pet and it got too big and somebody was like, I don't know what to do with this and he put it in this park, in the water.
00:21:31.000 That's the story of Florida.
00:21:34.000 Florida's an amazing story.
00:21:37.000 Florida's just overrun with pythons.
00:21:40.000 There's a half a million pythons in the Everglades.
00:21:43.000 They say that 99% of all of the mammals are gone.
00:21:47.000 Of everything.
00:21:48.000 Raccoons, deer, everything.
00:21:49.000 Rabbits.
00:21:50.000 They're all gone.
00:21:52.000 Foxes, pumas, everything.
00:21:53.000 Maybe that's what you need to be hunting then.
00:21:55.000 Yeah, well, they are doing that.
00:21:57.000 What's crazy is in California, python skin's illegal.
00:22:00.000 Is it?
00:22:02.000 It's banned.
00:22:03.000 You can't get python in California.
00:22:05.000 Meanwhile, on the other side of the country, they're overrun with pythons.
00:22:10.000 Like, they literally have wiped out all of the native wildlife.
00:22:14.000 They're eating alligators now.
00:22:15.000 That's crazy.
00:22:16.000 Yeah.
00:22:18.000 4 to 25 pound cut tiger living in Harlem apartment.
00:22:22.000 Oh my god.
00:22:22.000 Oh my god!
00:22:24.000 Yeah, that's part of the story.
00:22:25.000 I mean, imagine showing up to that and you're like, I'm out of here.
00:22:28.000 Oh my god.
00:22:29.000 I'm not getting paid enough for this.
00:22:31.000 I think they're the most beautiful animals.
00:22:33.000 They're beautiful.
00:22:34.000 But like, what are you doing in a tiny studio apartment with a tiger?
00:22:38.000 No, it's insane.
00:22:38.000 It's an insane person.
00:22:40.000 It's like some dude who met some dude who knows a guy who can get you a tiger.
00:22:43.000 Of course.
00:22:44.000 Do you know there's more tigers in Texas in private collections than there are in all of the wild of the world?
00:22:52.000 Are they just like in their private backyards and stuff?
00:22:55.000 Tiger world.
00:22:56.000 I mean, when they attack people, I'm like, yeah, I get it.
00:23:00.000 You're caging this animal that should be in the wild.
00:23:02.000 Yeah.
00:23:03.000 Texas is very strange when it comes to wildlife.
00:23:06.000 You can kind of own anything.
00:23:08.000 This is just fucking nuts here.
00:23:11.000 Anything goes.
00:23:12.000 Get you a zebra, Adrian.
00:23:13.000 I want a baby zebra, not when it gets big.
00:23:16.000 Once it gets big, I'm going to put it in that lake with that alligator.
00:23:19.000 I care.
00:23:20.000 Fend for yourself.
00:23:22.000 Yeah, there's apparently a couple thousand more tigers in Texas than there are in the wild.
00:23:28.000 Did you ever watch Tiger King?
00:23:29.000 Oh, yeah.
00:23:30.000 I love it.
00:23:30.000 I mean, just such trash.
00:23:32.000 It's so great.
00:23:33.000 I was not so secretly hoping that Trump would pardon him.
00:23:37.000 Yeah.
00:23:38.000 This guy has probably a third level education.
00:23:41.000 He's just trying to make money.
00:23:43.000 Talk those straight guys into fucking him, so respect.
00:23:46.000 Yeah, but I feel like rich people can get away with that.
00:23:49.000 It's like why hot women fuck ugly dudes that are rich.
00:23:52.000 You're like, well, hopefully they'll buy me something.
00:23:53.000 You think that works with guys?
00:23:54.000 Yes.
00:23:55.000 Absolutely.
00:23:57.000 I guess with some guys.
00:23:58.000 But everything.
00:23:59.000 It's like what works on everybody.
00:24:02.000 Because some things don't work on some people, but they work on other people.
00:24:07.000 I think money always works on everyone.
00:24:10.000 Sure, but some people are really dumb.
00:24:13.000 Some people, you can get them with a pretty simple cult.
00:24:16.000 Not even that good.
00:24:18.000 If you just post on Craigslist that you're starting a new religion.
00:24:21.000 I've thought about doing it and seeing who would show up.
00:24:23.000 People would show up.
00:24:25.000 Loyalists.
00:24:26.000 I was the first.
00:24:27.000 I was with Adrienne when she became awoken.
00:24:29.000 In the beginning.
00:24:31.000 That'd be so crazy.
00:24:33.000 You could start a cult.
00:24:34.000 100% you could start a cult.
00:24:36.000 I would do that and then just start a landscaping business and that would be what I'd tell them our religion is.
00:24:40.000 Just cleaning people's yards and stuff.
00:24:43.000 Oh my god.
00:24:45.000 It's such a weird thing, cults.
00:24:47.000 It seems to be like a natural pattern of behavior that people have where they're willing to believe fucking total nonsense as long as everybody in the group believes total nonsense.
00:25:01.000 Sure.
00:25:01.000 It's also wanting to, like, belong to something.
00:25:03.000 Yep.
00:25:04.000 You know, especially if you feel like an outcast.
00:25:06.000 Yeah.
00:25:07.000 And there's some that are good at it.
00:25:09.000 Like, Scientology's good at it.
00:25:11.000 I think at the root of every cult, there is a guy that wants to fuck everyone.
00:25:15.000 So, like, that's...
00:25:16.000 Generally.
00:25:16.000 Generally.
00:25:17.000 Most of those cults start out where, like, you have to fuck me, and that's how you get, like, to this higher level, or...
00:25:23.000 Or the Heaven's Gate guy.
00:25:24.000 You have to cut your balls off.
00:25:26.000 Remember that guy?
00:25:27.000 I do, but I don't remember...
00:25:28.000 Everybody had to castrate themselves.
00:25:30.000 Was he castrated also?
00:25:32.000 I think he was.
00:25:33.000 He might have done it to himself and got people to do it.
00:25:36.000 It was a weird one.
00:25:39.000 They all wore the same Nikes and they all killed themselves because they thought that the spaceship was coming to attack them and they had to kill themselves.
00:25:45.000 What's crazy is I watched that documentary and I was bored by it.
00:25:49.000 Well, it's weird, right?
00:25:51.000 Because it's so dumb.
00:25:53.000 You're like, who's buying into this?
00:25:55.000 But even something that dumb, there's someone out there that's like, who's the fucking Nikes?
00:26:02.000 It's a weird one.
00:26:03.000 Click on that.
00:26:04.000 How it really happened.
00:26:06.000 It's such a strange story.
00:26:08.000 Because I don't know what the guy's origin was.
00:26:11.000 Like, how he got all these people.
00:26:17.000 It's not playing.
00:26:19.000 I just remember watching it and being very bored by it.
00:26:22.000 I was bored by this guy that started a cult and, God, everyone's killed themselves.
00:26:26.000 I loved Wild Wild Country.
00:26:28.000 Did you see that one?
00:26:28.000 Yes.
00:26:29.000 Is that the one where they're going through a drive-through?
00:26:32.000 That's the one where the Indian guru, he set up shop in this town in Oregon.
00:26:38.000 They took over the whole town.
00:26:39.000 Oh, yes.
00:26:40.000 Yeah.
00:26:41.000 And they started busting in homeless people so they could vote out everybody.
00:26:44.000 So the homeless people would now be citizens.
00:26:46.000 That's a good angle.
00:26:46.000 It was amazing.
00:26:47.000 But then it was really sad because those homeless people had a sense of purpose for the first time in their life.
00:26:51.000 And some of them were like, I'm fucking all in.
00:26:54.000 These are my people, you know, and they were fucking doing hard work and they were really like they felt and then at the end after they voted like get the fuck out of here.
00:27:04.000 UFO cults.
00:27:05.000 UFO cult apparently.
00:27:06.000 Well, let me hear him talk.
00:27:08.000 I'm gonna go when I said that the big surprise could come that spacecrafts could come in by the thousands, maybe come in ships.
00:27:19.000 That music, I'm out.
00:27:22.000 It's so creepy.
00:27:23.000 Well, that's editorialized, right?
00:27:25.000 That's someone else putting something.
00:27:26.000 But this is part of some History Channel thing, I think.
00:27:30.000 Did you hear about the Sanctum Cult stuff today with Hunter Biden?
00:27:33.000 What is that?
00:27:34.000 I'm obsessed with Hunter Biden.
00:27:36.000 Yeah, the story I saw was that the leader of this LA sex club that cost $75,000 a year was kicked out of the club because he shared that Hunter Biden was once a member.
00:27:46.000 And all he shared was a social media post that said, I kicked him out because he was weird.
00:27:51.000 But then they kicked him out of the club because you're not allowed to talk about the club.
00:27:54.000 Ooh, Fight Club.
00:27:57.000 I fucked up.
00:27:59.000 I had a chance to get Hunter Biden on the podcast in the very beginning.
00:28:02.000 I think you can.
00:28:02.000 I can't.
00:28:03.000 I tried.
00:28:03.000 Wait for him to get back on crack.
00:28:05.000 I can get him back on crack.
00:28:07.000 Do it.
00:28:08.000 That's when you get him back.
00:28:08.000 Yeah, I'll try it for the first time.
00:28:10.000 Well, I hear my friend did crack.
00:28:12.000 And he's like, it's amazing.
00:28:15.000 Well, it's cocaine.
00:28:16.000 It's freebasing cocaine.
00:28:17.000 Dr. Carl Hart, who's a brilliant guy who's a legitimate academic but also is a drug user.
00:28:25.000 And he's like, there's no difference.
00:28:28.000 Pharmacologically, it's the same drug.
00:28:29.000 You're freebasing.
00:28:30.000 I can see that.
00:28:31.000 Yeah.
00:28:32.000 It's like the real thing that's different is the policy.
00:28:35.000 Because it's the most racist policy in the history of the drug war.
00:28:38.000 Like, if you get busted with cocaine, it's one.
00:28:41.000 One thing.
00:28:42.000 But if you get busted with crack, you get a crazy sentence.
00:28:46.000 Yes.
00:28:47.000 Like, way, way, way more.
00:28:48.000 It's just racist.
00:28:49.000 Well, it's not just racist.
00:28:50.000 It's like, when you really go into, like, the origins of...
00:28:54.000 You aware of the Freeway Rick Ross story?
00:28:57.000 No.
00:28:58.000 Rick Ross, not the rapper, but the real Rick Ross, was a drug dealer in South Central LA. And he couldn't even read.
00:29:05.000 And he was making millions and millions of dollars.
00:29:07.000 He was like a star tennis player.
00:29:09.000 And figured out how to make money doing it.
00:29:12.000 Just a smart, smooth dude who knew how to move cocaine.
00:29:16.000 But he didn't know he was moving it for the CIA. Oh.
00:29:21.000 He didn't know he was moving it to fund the Contras versus the Sandinistas in Nicaragua.
00:29:26.000 Interesting.
00:29:26.000 So this is the whole Oliver North thing.
00:29:29.000 So they lock him up.
00:29:31.000 He learns how to read in jail and becomes a lawyer.
00:29:35.000 And then realizes they got him on, you know, three strikes.
00:29:40.000 But it can't be three strikes in one crime.
00:29:44.000 It has to be three different crimes, three different arrests.
00:29:49.000 Right.
00:29:49.000 So he got out.
00:29:52.000 That's crazy.
00:29:52.000 Crazy.
00:29:53.000 But, like, look what they did for him.
00:29:55.000 He learned to read.
00:29:56.000 He became a lawyer.
00:29:58.000 Do you know what I mean?
00:29:59.000 Like, what a fucking great story that is.
00:30:02.000 He's an awesome guy, too.
00:30:04.000 But that's where crack was coming from.
00:30:09.000 I mean, it was our own fucking government.
00:30:11.000 Oh, yeah.
00:30:12.000 It was rogue.
00:30:13.000 I should be real clear about this.
00:30:15.000 Probably rogue outlaw entities in our own government.
00:30:19.000 It's not like our government approves that.
00:30:21.000 Didn't Reagan put crack into the community pretty much?
00:30:24.000 Reagan did it himself.
00:30:26.000 He went in the middle of the night like Santa Claus.
00:30:28.000 It's like a little crack for everybody.
00:30:31.000 Well, you know, the whole fucking drug war is just bananas when you're actually still selling drugs.
00:30:40.000 It's a war on drug competition is all it is.
00:30:42.000 It's not a drug war.
00:30:44.000 The drugs are making billions of dollars.
00:30:45.000 Like, okay, no more money for drugs.
00:30:47.000 Drugs are now illegal to sell.
00:30:49.000 Like, what are you talking about?
00:30:50.000 No way.
00:30:51.000 Look at the amount of money that people make on just drugs that everyone agrees that, listen, I don't take Adderall, but I 100% support your right to take Adderall.
00:31:01.000 Sure.
00:31:02.000 I hear it's awesome.
00:31:03.000 And people who take it, they can't shut the fuck up about it.
00:31:06.000 Yeah, it's like me and my friend used to take Stacker 2. I think it's the same thing.
00:31:10.000 We would, like, do everything in the office.
00:31:11.000 Everyone would love when we took it.
00:31:13.000 But guess what, kids?
00:31:15.000 That's a drug.
00:31:16.000 Yeah.
00:31:17.000 That's a drug.
00:31:17.000 Absolutely.
00:31:18.000 I mean, the fact that you're getting it from your doctor.
00:31:21.000 I mean, doctors prescribe so much stuff.
00:31:22.000 Tell the doctors to sell Coke.
00:31:24.000 Why not?
00:31:25.000 Why not?
00:31:27.000 I tried to get prescription for Xanax and my doctor looked at me where he was just like, I'm not giving it to you.
00:31:31.000 And I was like, are you serious?
00:31:33.000 Oh my god, really?
00:31:34.000 Yeah, because I wanted it to fly.
00:31:35.000 He's like, I'm not doing it.
00:31:36.000 He's like, they're really cracking down right now so you can't have any.
00:31:39.000 Well, the thing about benzodiazepine is it's very difficult to kick.
00:31:44.000 Very difficult.
00:31:45.000 Physiologically.
00:31:46.000 It's one of the only drugs like alcohol that'll kill you if you just go cold turkey sometimes.
00:31:52.000 Some people just get wrecked by that stuff.
00:31:55.000 Jordan Peterson got wrecked.
00:31:57.000 Like physically wrecked for like over a year.
00:32:00.000 It took him so long just to build his health back up.
00:32:03.000 Well, my friend that was doing crack was also doing Xanax.
00:32:07.000 So, and he was like, his doctor just made him go, I guess, cold turkey.
00:32:11.000 But he had been doing so much that when he stopped, he went ballistic.
00:32:15.000 Oh, my God.
00:32:16.000 Yeah.
00:32:16.000 It's supposed to be horrible.
00:32:18.000 It is horrible.
00:32:19.000 Horrible, horrible withdrawals.
00:32:20.000 Especially when people go crazy and they're eating it all day long.
00:32:23.000 Oh yeah, he was taking it all day.
00:32:26.000 That was rough for him.
00:32:27.000 That's when he started doing crack with prostitutes.
00:32:30.000 I had a buddy that was a comic and was just having anxiety attacks.
00:32:33.000 He just couldn't fucking control it and started taking Xanax.
00:32:36.000 And it all went away.
00:32:38.000 And then all of a sudden it was fun again.
00:32:40.000 It was weird.
00:32:42.000 Anxiety is terrible.
00:32:43.000 It's terrible.
00:32:45.000 And I know his health deteriorated, but he was drinking while he was doing it, which you're not supposed to do, which a lot of people do do.
00:32:53.000 This lady said this to me on an airplane.
00:32:55.000 She had a glass of wine.
00:32:57.000 She goes, a glass of wine and a Xanax, and I don't give a fuck about the world.
00:33:03.000 Yeah.
00:33:04.000 I've taken Xanax if I went to Australia and I took it and I slept most of the flight.
00:33:09.000 It just knocks you out.
00:33:10.000 Yeah, I would imagine.
00:33:12.000 It's a good move for a 16-hour flight.
00:33:13.000 But is the come down bad?
00:33:16.000 You're exhausted.
00:33:17.000 You're like so tired the rest of that day.
00:33:19.000 You're done.
00:33:20.000 There's nothing you can do.
00:33:21.000 That's why I would only take it if I was flying.
00:33:25.000 Right.
00:33:26.000 Yeah, that would make me think that if you took it before you went on stage, that wouldn't be good either.
00:33:31.000 No, it's like a real downer.
00:33:33.000 I think he was doing that though.
00:33:35.000 I'm amazed by people that could do so much drugs and drink and go on stage.
00:33:40.000 I wonder, though, how it's interacting with whatever individual's level of anxiety.
00:33:46.000 We all assume that people have the same anxiety, but my level of anxiety differs throughout the day, depending on what I'm doing, depending on my activity level, whether I've exercised, whether I slept well.
00:34:00.000 I don't have a lot of anxiety, but if someone had a lot of anxiety, I don't even know what that feels like.
00:34:09.000 Like, if Xanax is the only thing that takes them out of that, like, give them some fucking Xanax.
00:34:14.000 Absolutely.
00:34:14.000 It's just for me, it makes me like a zombie.
00:34:16.000 That's why I really can't take it.
00:34:18.000 I just wish there was something that had that sort of an effect, but wasn't, like, so ferociously addictive.
00:34:26.000 I mean...
00:34:27.000 Probably mushrooms.
00:34:29.000 I don't know.
00:34:30.000 I'm scared to do any of those drugs.
00:34:32.000 I'm scared.
00:34:33.000 Why?
00:34:34.000 I don't know.
00:34:35.000 I reacted so badly.
00:34:38.000 I did an edible when I was at Moon Tower last year, and I'd never done it before, and it was the worst experience.
00:34:44.000 How many milligrams?
00:34:47.000 I don't remember.
00:34:48.000 It was in a bag that they gave you, and my friend was like, this is...
00:34:51.000 No, it was from a company, though.
00:34:53.000 She was like, this is very weak.
00:34:54.000 I know, but it wasn't just some guy off the street handed it to me, so I was like, oh, this seems legitimate.
00:34:59.000 And I took it, and I remember going to sleep and waking up to hearing the ocean.
00:35:04.000 I mean, it was so wild.
00:35:05.000 I thought I was in that movie with Russell Crowe.
00:35:08.000 What's that movie where he thinks he's in the CIA, but he's just bipolar or schizophrenic?
00:35:13.000 Oh, yeah.
00:35:14.000 So the whole time I thought I was in that situation.
00:35:17.000 I mean, it's not good for me.
00:35:19.000 My friend came over and I was like, I used the same logic he used where he realized those people never aged, where I was like, okay, well, you're the same now.
00:35:29.000 It was so crazy.
00:35:30.000 I can't do drugs.
00:35:31.000 Those people never aged?
00:35:32.000 In that movie, I guess he sees a little girl and he has this roommate.
00:35:37.000 The Russell Crowe movie.
00:35:38.000 Oh, the Russell Crowe movie.
00:35:39.000 Yeah, but he realizes they're not real because 10 years later they're still the same age.
00:35:44.000 And I used that logic to think that my friend, I was like, well, you're still exactly the same.
00:35:50.000 I went there.
00:35:51.000 It was so crazy.
00:35:52.000 Whoa.
00:35:53.000 That's why I was like, I'm not good on drugs.
00:35:55.000 Well, that's a big dose, it sounds like.
00:35:57.000 I think someone...
00:35:58.000 The problem with those edibles, I used to have a bit about it, is they're not consistent.
00:36:01.000 They're not making them in the same place they make Tylenol.
00:36:04.000 They should.
00:36:05.000 Yeah, they should.
00:36:06.000 It should be legal.
00:36:07.000 They should all be legal, so we'd know exactly what the fuck you're taking.
00:36:11.000 I mean, how many people have to die of fentanyl before they realize, like...
00:36:14.000 We have to figure out, if there's a demand for these drugs, if people want these drugs, maybe it's education, maybe it's counseling, maybe it's drug rehabilitation centers that we need to open everywhere, and then there's a business in that.
00:36:25.000 But you should be allowing people to have access to the actual drug.
00:36:32.000 Coke that you're getting on the street that's cut with fentanyl that's going to kill people.
00:36:36.000 How many people have to fucking die before you realize you're not going to stop people from doing coke with the Just Say No campaign?
00:36:41.000 So what are you going to do?
00:36:43.000 Why don't you let reputable companies sell that and sell pure versions of it and tell them what the fucking dose is that's going to kill you.
00:36:51.000 Let people know what's going on and then make it so that you have to be 21 to buy it and educate people.
00:36:57.000 Like, we're going to open up the country to legal drug sales.
00:37:01.000 Because if you don't, all you're doing is arming the outlaws.
00:37:05.000 You're giving them money, all the outlaws.
00:37:07.000 And it's unregulated.
00:37:08.000 And it's right south across our border.
00:37:10.000 The Mexican cartels are fucking killing it.
00:37:13.000 And they're not killing it because just say no worked.
00:37:15.000 They're killing it because we don't have legal drugs.
00:37:18.000 So they sell illegal drugs.
00:37:20.000 It's fucking bananas that a problem is so obvious.
00:37:24.000 It's an uncomfortable solution, but you've got to rip off the fucking band-aid, and you've got to make everything legal.
00:37:32.000 Remember that professor that was doing heroin recreationally?
00:37:37.000 Dr. Carl Hart.
00:37:38.000 Same guy.
00:37:39.000 I love that dude.
00:37:40.000 He's been on the podcast a few times.
00:37:42.000 Yeah.
00:37:43.000 Well, he does it recreationally.
00:37:44.000 Yeah.
00:37:45.000 And he talks about it.
00:37:46.000 He says it's wonderful.
00:37:47.000 He says, I love to just be with my wife and listen to music.
00:37:51.000 I just feel like once I did that, I'd be like, well, this also seems like a good idea tomorrow.
00:37:56.000 Like, I don't know that I would stop.
00:37:58.000 That's a problem with addiction.
00:38:00.000 Like, it's just like, that guy can do it, but like...
00:38:03.000 Right.
00:38:05.000 Well, one of the things that he talked about that's interesting is like this heroin withdrawal myth.
00:38:12.000 He's like, it's like getting sick.
00:38:14.000 It's like you're sick with a cold for a couple days.
00:38:17.000 He goes, that's what it's like.
00:38:18.000 It's not like you're dying.
00:38:19.000 He goes, it's not that bad.
00:38:21.000 He goes, it's just very exaggerated in media depictions of films, and people are like...
00:38:26.000 But that sounds awful.
00:38:28.000 Sounds like it sucks to have a cold for a few days, but then you're not addicted to heroin anymore.
00:38:33.000 But then if you just keep doing heroin, you just keep feeling better.
00:38:36.000 Well, also, you gotta realize, what does sick mean?
00:38:41.000 Like, if you're sick and you've been doing heroin a lot and so you're malnourished and your immune system is dead and, you know, you have very little sleep and you're just all fucked up and poor, and then you get withdrawals and you get really sick,
00:38:57.000 that could fucking kill you, depending upon your health.
00:39:00.000 Depending on how healthy of a heroin person you are.
00:39:03.000 Yeah.
00:39:03.000 Like I wonder if he calls in sick and everyone's like, he's doing heroin.
00:39:06.000 People do heroin recreationally and they have for a long time.
00:39:10.000 There was this buddy of mine who was a longshoreman in Boston and he worked with this guy who would buy a bag of heroin at lunch every day and he would go in his truck and he would shoot up.
00:39:22.000 That seems like a lot of heroin.
00:39:24.000 Well, I mean, I don't know how much he did at a time, but this guy was functional.
00:39:28.000 He said he would go in his car, he would shoot up.
00:39:31.000 Everybody knew what he was doing.
00:39:32.000 He would go in his car and shoot up, and he would sit in his car for his hour lunch break, and then he'd go back to work.
00:39:38.000 No problems.
00:39:39.000 Insane.
00:39:40.000 Insane.
00:39:41.000 I mean, with Xanax, I want to fall asleep.
00:39:43.000 It's a weird thing.
00:39:45.000 I met a guy who was a pool player once.
00:39:47.000 He was a very prominent, top-level pool player where he'd gamble for a lot of money.
00:39:54.000 And we were at a pool hall in White Plains, New York.
00:39:57.000 They called him Buffalo Bill was one of his nicknames.
00:40:00.000 Water Dog was another one of his nicknames.
00:40:02.000 And this dude, he had to do heroin before he played.
00:40:05.000 And everybody knew.
00:40:06.000 So this guy was gambling with him.
00:40:08.000 And this guy, Water Dog, goes into the bathroom...
00:40:11.000 Locks the door.
00:40:12.000 He's in there for like 10 minutes.
00:40:14.000 He comes out and he just sits on the chair like this.
00:40:17.000 Like a billiards chair.
00:40:18.000 He sits like this.
00:40:20.000 For like 20 minutes.
00:40:21.000 Just sits there like this.
00:40:26.000 And we're just looking at him.
00:40:27.000 And I was, you know, 23 at the time or something like that.
00:40:30.000 I was like, look at this motherfucker.
00:40:32.000 Look at him.
00:40:32.000 And then he would get up and it was like he had shark eyes.
00:40:36.000 There was like no one there.
00:40:37.000 There was no one there.
00:40:38.000 And then he would play pool and he couldn't miss.
00:40:41.000 He couldn't miss.
00:40:41.000 It was insane.
00:40:42.000 It was insane to watch.
00:40:44.000 Was it playing on this...
00:40:45.000 This table with these really tight pockets, and they're gambling for a lot of money.
00:40:49.000 That should be not legal.
00:40:50.000 He has no nerves.
00:40:51.000 He has no nerves.
00:40:52.000 He's not feeling any pressure at all.
00:40:54.000 He's just playing perfect.
00:40:56.000 And everybody watching is like, holy shit.
00:40:58.000 And it made people want to do heroin.
00:41:01.000 Not that it shouldn't have been legal, but I'm saying if you're playing him and you're against him, I'd be like, he can't do heroin.
00:41:08.000 That just enhances his performance.
00:41:09.000 You're talking about pool.
00:41:11.000 In the pool world, everybody does drugs.
00:41:15.000 Really?
00:41:15.000 I mean, there's elite players that are completely clean and sober on a professional level.
00:41:21.000 Absolutely.
00:41:21.000 But in pool hall gambling...
00:41:24.000 Drugs were ubiquitous.
00:41:26.000 Drugs were like- Interesting.
00:41:27.000 I don't know about the- Amphetamines were like the choice pill for people when they gambled like 20 hours in a row.
00:41:35.000 They would just take the amphetamines and keep gambling.
00:41:37.000 I just think like, I would be scared to do that.
00:41:40.000 Addiction is so rampant in my family.
00:41:42.000 Like, my biological father was a drug user.
00:41:46.000 My uncle was a hell's angel.
00:41:47.000 He was on tons of drugs and stuff.
00:41:49.000 So I just feel like, I don't know, I have enough issues.
00:41:51.000 Yeah, I hear ya.
00:41:53.000 I don't know if drug addiction is...
00:41:55.000 I think some of it's got to be physical.
00:41:57.000 Some of it's got to be genetic.
00:41:59.000 It's got to be.
00:42:00.000 It just makes sense.
00:42:01.000 People from some parts of the world where they don't have a history of alcohol, they experience alcohol, they have real problems with it.
00:42:07.000 Part of it's got to be genetic.
00:42:09.000 But then part of it's got to be cultural, too, when you're around all these people.
00:42:13.000 Definitely.
00:42:13.000 It becomes like learned behavior.
00:42:16.000 It's, you know, release at the end of the day.
00:42:18.000 Give me a fucking beer.
00:42:20.000 Yeah.
00:42:20.000 It's just become something that, you know...
00:42:22.000 It gets very ingrained.
00:42:24.000 And also the patterns of behavior that come with alcoholism.
00:42:27.000 The fucking up, and the life falling apart, and the disastrous choices you make.
00:42:33.000 Driving drunk, just like losing your family.
00:42:36.000 Fights.
00:42:37.000 Yeah, all that, all that.
00:42:40.000 How many lives have been lost to drugs that you could buy legally?
00:42:45.000 Like booze.
00:42:46.000 Booze has fucked up more people.
00:42:49.000 But I like it.
00:42:50.000 Yeah, of course.
00:42:50.000 I like it.
00:42:51.000 I like a little drink every now and then.
00:42:53.000 But the idea that we're protecting people by keeping some drugs illegal, I think what we're doing is we're making a nanny state that we can't get out of.
00:43:02.000 And we've gotten ourselves into this box, this nanny state box.
00:43:06.000 Maybe down the line it will be legal.
00:43:08.000 Who knows?
00:43:08.000 It's going to be because it's illegal now in certain states.
00:43:13.000 Like, Oregon has essentially decriminalized everything.
00:43:16.000 They've decriminalized cocaine, mushrooms, whatever.
00:43:21.000 You're not supposed to sell it.
00:43:22.000 You can't sell it, but you can have it, which is wild.
00:43:25.000 So where do you get it from?
00:43:27.000 Yeah, that's a good point.
00:43:29.000 You know, I don't know if they're specific about that.
00:43:32.000 I don't know if there's, like, legal distributions.
00:43:34.000 I know they have legal marijuana.
00:43:35.000 Right.
00:43:36.000 But that's like 18 states now have legal weed.
00:43:40.000 Legal weed is pretty...
00:43:41.000 Pretty well accepted as a good thing and I think even though there's a lot of right-wing people that smoke weed And I think that was a big change because I think a lot of left-wing people were always associated with marijuana and laziness and then right-wing people like fuck that fucking potheads now a lot of right-wing people like maybe your dad's got arthritis and he smokes a little weed before he goes to bed and and Maybe you have an edible and you really like hanging out with your wife and watching movies and then,
00:44:11.000 you know, you're like, hey, maybe this pot's not that bad.
00:44:13.000 I don't know.
00:44:14.000 Don't you feel like a lot of people are doing coke?
00:44:16.000 Like on both sides?
00:44:17.000 I think so.
00:44:18.000 I mean, I know so.
00:44:20.000 I know a lot of people are doing coke.
00:44:22.000 Yeah.
00:44:22.000 So it's like, I don't know.
00:44:24.000 I feel like both sides do everything.
00:44:26.000 Yeah, but I think psychedelics, well, not anymore.
00:44:30.000 I used to say psychedelics are more likely to be tried by the left, but god damn, there's a lot of soldiers that have had great benefit with psychedelics, and they've shared those experiences with a lot of other soldiers.
00:44:41.000 I've had quite a few talk about it on this podcast, but one of the things that MAPS is doing is using MDMA for soldiers with PTSD, and that's showing amazing results.
00:44:52.000 So I think the right is opening up their eyes to it more, too.
00:44:56.000 It's a quality of life thing that's probably been here forever, and if you believe in God, he probably put all that stuff here for us.
00:45:02.000 It's just managing it correctly.
00:45:04.000 The ones that can be beneficial, like mushrooms, like MDMA, all these things, they have a positive effect when done correctly with the right person.
00:45:15.000 Sure.
00:45:16.000 And to deny that is just stupid at this point.
00:45:18.000 To make them schedule one drugs In 2023 with ChatGPT and everyone's got 5G, we know what the fuck is going on.
00:45:26.000 Right.
00:45:27.000 Like, stop!
00:45:28.000 But even something like gambling that's legal can still ruin your life.
00:45:31.000 Fuck yeah, it can.
00:45:32.000 Yeah.
00:45:33.000 And I support it.
00:45:34.000 Yeah, my dad was a gambler.
00:45:36.000 Let's go!
00:45:36.000 We had nothing.
00:45:39.000 We used to gamble with our lives pretty regularly.
00:45:42.000 God, isn't that crazy?
00:45:44.000 When I first started playing pool, that's when I first started being around gamblers.
00:45:48.000 I've never been around gamblers as a child.
00:45:51.000 And so I never knew what that addiction is like to watch it play out.
00:45:55.000 Oh, yeah.
00:45:56.000 It's crazy.
00:45:57.000 My dad was just emotionally unavailable.
00:46:00.000 Just always wanted to gamble.
00:46:02.000 Always wanted to gamble.
00:46:03.000 We used to go to the OTB as kids.
00:46:04.000 We went there so often, the lady behind the thing had my school picture up.
00:46:08.000 That's how often we went there.
00:46:10.000 Oh my god.
00:46:12.000 Yeah, he was a bad gambler.
00:46:13.000 But he also didn't make a lot of money, which is crazy.
00:46:16.000 Right?
00:46:17.000 It's like, you can't be a mailman and a gambler.
00:46:20.000 It gets anybody.
00:46:22.000 No, I know.
00:46:22.000 It can get anybody.
00:46:24.000 Did you see Uncut Gems?
00:46:27.000 No.
00:46:27.000 It's fucking amazing.
00:46:29.000 Is it?
00:46:29.000 Yeah, it's Adam Sandler plays a gambling addict.
00:46:31.000 Oh, I'll watch it.
00:46:32.000 And you will get such anxiety while you're watching.
00:46:34.000 You'll be like, oh, Jesus fucking Christ.
00:46:36.000 What are you doing?
00:46:37.000 What are you doing?
00:46:38.000 It's so good.
00:46:39.000 Adam Sandler is so good in it.
00:46:41.000 And it's a dramatic role.
00:46:44.000 I'll watch it.
00:46:44.000 It's not a comedy at all.
00:46:46.000 Adam Sandler killed it.
00:46:47.000 It's a great movie.
00:46:48.000 Is he like a rich gambler in it?
00:46:50.000 He's a jeweler.
00:46:51.000 Oh, okay.
00:46:52.000 Yeah.
00:46:53.000 And it's just, it's great.
00:46:54.000 It's great.
00:46:55.000 It's great.
00:46:56.000 But those guys are real.
00:46:58.000 I know those guys.
00:46:59.000 I knew a lot of those guys.
00:47:00.000 They would come into the pool hall and just start talking about the loss and the this and I'm going to get it back and the fucking, the bulls are down by six and they were just...
00:47:12.000 They were just in it all the time.
00:47:13.000 I was like, this is crazy.
00:47:15.000 My dad's thing was like OTB and gambling and the Meadowlands and any of that stuff.
00:47:19.000 I mean, he also, I think, gambled on football and stuff, but mostly like the horses.
00:47:23.000 Yeah, the horses are crazy.
00:47:24.000 But he liked Atlantic City, too, stuff like that.
00:47:26.000 Dog races.
00:47:28.000 I don't know if he did that, but I'm sure he would.
00:47:30.000 I feel like he'd gamble on anything.
00:47:33.000 I had a friend of mine who adopted a Greyhound.
00:47:36.000 Oh, one of the ones that was like Mr. Race.
00:47:38.000 And I had an apartment at the time, but I was going to get one too.
00:47:42.000 They were so cool.
00:47:44.000 They're so sleek.
00:47:48.000 My friend was trying to walk it.
00:47:49.000 The leashes come off their head, he said.
00:47:51.000 Yeah.
00:47:52.000 Well, not only that, when my friend took his out, he didn't realize, first of all, they're so fast.
00:47:59.000 Oh, yeah.
00:48:00.000 They're very fast.
00:48:00.000 When they go, like, you are not catching them.
00:48:03.000 And when he saw a cat, he just went after it.
00:48:07.000 And so he was off leash in this, like, empty park.
00:48:10.000 He thought he'd be fine.
00:48:11.000 And the fucking greyhound just went for that cat.
00:48:14.000 Well, he's really free now.
00:48:16.000 Yeah.
00:48:17.000 It's like he didn't realize, like, oh, they're not cool with animals.
00:48:21.000 Like, that's the whole thing about racing is they're chasing a rabbit.
00:48:24.000 Right.
00:48:24.000 If they see an animal, they fucking sprint towards it.
00:48:28.000 Yeah, you can't deprogram that.
00:48:29.000 No, no, no, no.
00:48:31.000 So he realized, like, oh, my God, I got to be really careful with this thing.
00:48:34.000 Can't just, like, ever let it go without a leash.
00:48:36.000 You ever see the little ones, the little greyhounds?
00:48:38.000 No.
00:48:39.000 They have miniature greyhounds.
00:48:40.000 Miniature greyhounds?
00:48:41.000 Yeah.
00:48:42.000 Aw.
00:48:43.000 They're cute.
00:48:44.000 Let me see, Jamie.
00:48:46.000 They're cute.
00:48:47.000 They're like just big gray.
00:48:48.000 They have the same thing.
00:48:49.000 You know what the weirdest dog is?
00:48:51.000 Which one?
00:48:52.000 A whippet with a myostatin inhibitor.
00:48:55.000 I don't even know what that is.
00:48:56.000 A whippet is this cute dog.
00:48:59.000 Aw, look at that little cutie.
00:49:01.000 Yeah.
00:49:02.000 Aw, that's adorable.
00:49:03.000 That was a little cuddle dog.
00:49:05.000 They're fast.
00:49:06.000 Wow, look at them go.
00:49:07.000 Look how they cross their legs like that.
00:49:09.000 They just get so much fucking torque.
00:49:11.000 They have so much energy.
00:49:13.000 So there's a dog called a Whippet, and every now and then they have a genetic anomaly.
00:49:18.000 It's a myostatin inhibitor, and it causes them their uncontrollable growth of muscles.
00:49:23.000 What do they look like?
00:49:24.000 Freaks.
00:49:25.000 They don't even look like they're real.
00:49:27.000 They look like a comic superhero, like if you had injected a comic book superhero dog with, like, Hulk serum.
00:49:34.000 It just went...
00:49:34.000 Are they fighting those things?
00:49:36.000 No, no, no, no.
00:49:37.000 Look, that's what it looks like.
00:49:38.000 Oh, gross.
00:49:40.000 Isn't that crazy?
00:49:41.000 Look how jacked he is.
00:49:42.000 That's not, that's like natural?
00:49:44.000 Yeah, it's just a natural genetic anomaly.
00:49:47.000 But like, why wouldn't you fight that?
00:49:49.000 That thing is huge.
00:49:49.000 Because they're nice.
00:49:50.000 They don't want to fight.
00:49:51.000 No, I know, but they're like teaching other dogs to fight.
00:49:54.000 I'm surprised they don't use these guys.
00:49:55.000 Well, it's not really as much about the strength of all those extra big muscles.
00:50:01.000 Those are going to cause you to get tired quicker.
00:50:04.000 And then on top of that, it's really the bite of the jaw.
00:50:07.000 That's true.
00:50:08.000 The strength of the bite and then also the game instinct.
00:50:12.000 So some dogs, when they get hurt, they want to get out of there.
00:50:14.000 And pit bulls don't care about that.
00:50:17.000 And that's bred into them.
00:50:19.000 So when a dog would cower away, they wouldn't allow that dog to breed.
00:50:21.000 And a lot of places, they kill the dog.
00:50:24.000 That was the whole thing.
00:50:25.000 Whenever they catch dog fighting, the horrible thing.
00:50:29.000 It's like what they do to the dogs who lose.
00:50:32.000 That's so sad.
00:50:32.000 Because they don't want them to breed.
00:50:33.000 If a dog quits, they just kill that dog.
00:50:36.000 I remember when everything was going on with Michael Vick, and I didn't know what he looked like, and I'd just seen this guy on the front of the newspaper.
00:50:42.000 I go, who's this guy?
00:50:43.000 He's hot.
00:50:43.000 And so I was like, that's Michael Vick.
00:50:44.000 And I was like, oh, that hurts so bad.
00:50:48.000 Yeah, he was involved in that stuff.
00:50:50.000 I knew a dude at one point in time.
00:50:52.000 He had like 13 dogs in his yard in, I think he was in Oklahoma.
00:51:00.000 And my friend was like, I think he really likes dogs.
00:51:03.000 I go, nah.
00:51:05.000 I go, he's got 13 pit bulls on chains in his yard.
00:51:08.000 I go, that guy fights dogs.
00:51:10.000 Yeah, that's gross.
00:51:11.000 I hate that.
00:51:12.000 He was a dog fighting, gambling guy.
00:51:16.000 So he was breeding dogs for dog fights.
00:51:18.000 That's still going on right now in this country.
00:51:20.000 Of course, yeah.
00:51:21.000 Underground dog fights.
00:51:23.000 I can't see that.
00:51:25.000 Nothing makes me more upset than that, I think.
00:51:27.000 That is horrible.
00:51:28.000 What's really fucked up is the dogs are wagging their tails.
00:51:32.000 Well, because they think that they're doing good.
00:51:33.000 Yeah, they enjoy that fight.
00:51:38.000 God damn it.
00:51:39.000 It's so awful.
00:51:41.000 It's just so crazy that that's going on right now.
00:51:44.000 So much stuff is going on right now.
00:51:46.000 Someone's getting sex trafficked right now.
00:51:47.000 Right now.
00:51:48.000 Right across the border.
00:51:51.000 Yeah.
00:51:52.000 Whenever I go to the airport and they have those signs in the bathroom like, if you're being sex trafficked, I'm like, you think they want them to go to the bathroom?
00:51:57.000 Oh, right.
00:51:59.000 Fuck.
00:51:59.000 Fuck.
00:52:01.000 It's just so hard to believe that some people are that evil.
00:52:05.000 Money makes people do crazy stuff, and I think your circumstances, too.
00:52:09.000 If you don't have money and you're like, this is something I can do, it's still shitty.
00:52:13.000 But I think some people are like, I have no other choice.
00:52:15.000 Yeah.
00:52:16.000 It doesn't make it right.
00:52:18.000 They have no other choice but the sex traffic?
00:52:20.000 Can't you sell stuff?
00:52:22.000 Yeah, they're selling the women.
00:52:24.000 I think it's the amount of money, too.
00:52:27.000 Yes, I think if you're selling knives door-to-door, you're not making as much.
00:52:32.000 He's like, I tried doing this for a year.
00:52:33.000 I wasn't making a lot of money.
00:52:35.000 Knives door to door.
00:52:37.000 Imagine having enthusiasm for that job.
00:52:39.000 No.
00:52:41.000 Fuck.
00:52:41.000 This is how you have to feed yourself.
00:52:43.000 Sell knives.
00:52:44.000 I remember when I first started doing stand-up, I would bark for stage time, which is basically like, hey, do you want to come to a comedy show?
00:52:49.000 And I was so bad at it.
00:52:51.000 Because people would just be like, no.
00:52:52.000 And I'd be like, all right.
00:52:55.000 I'm like, I get it.
00:52:56.000 I mean, I felt so dumb doing it.
00:52:58.000 Did you develop strategies on how to talk to people?
00:53:00.000 No.
00:53:02.000 I just hated it.
00:53:04.000 It's weird to just be on the street as a salesman and be like, hey, come to this show.
00:53:07.000 I think that's only a New York City thing.
00:53:09.000 It might be.
00:53:10.000 Have you seen it before?
00:53:12.000 I've seen it here on 6th Street.
00:53:14.000 Oh, in Austin?
00:53:15.000 For other things, too.
00:53:16.000 For stand-up shows?
00:53:17.000 For stand-up, yes, and I've seen it for other shows here, too.
00:53:19.000 No shit.
00:53:20.000 I wonder if they got it from New York.
00:53:23.000 I wonder.
00:53:24.000 I don't know.
00:53:25.000 I haven't paid attention.
00:53:26.000 I've always heard of it primarily as a New York thing.
00:53:29.000 I know a lot of New York guys used to do that in the early days.
00:53:32.000 Yeah, and especially in Manhattan, everyone's walking, so you can just catch people like that.
00:53:36.000 Yeah.
00:53:38.000 But I was not good at it at all.
00:53:40.000 Manhattan's an interesting place for comedy, you know, because there's so many clubs.
00:53:44.000 So many clubs.
00:53:45.000 Even so many, like, good bar shows and, like, lounges.
00:53:48.000 So you can get a lot of stage time.
00:53:50.000 Yeah.
00:53:51.000 And there's a lot of comics there, too.
00:53:53.000 There's so many comics.
00:53:55.000 And a lot of people kind of sprung up after the pandemic, too.
00:53:59.000 Like, a lot of people that had, like, social media, big social media presence, and then they just kind of switched into stand-up.
00:54:05.000 Like, if you're just doing funny videos.
00:54:07.000 Right.
00:54:08.000 So I think there's more people like that, too, doing stand-up.
00:54:12.000 Well, if your job got taken away from you during the pandemic, I would imagine that would be a good time to try stand-up, if you'd always wanted to do it.
00:54:20.000 Sure, while you're getting money from the government, of course.
00:54:23.000 How many open mic nights do they have?
00:54:24.000 Do they have a lot of open mic nights in New York?
00:54:26.000 Oh, there's mics every night.
00:54:27.000 Really?
00:54:27.000 You can do probably like six a night if you set it up right.
00:54:30.000 You can do a ton of mics.
00:54:32.000 Wow.
00:54:32.000 But they're expensive.
00:54:34.000 What do you mean?
00:54:35.000 You gotta pay.
00:54:36.000 You gotta pay like five bucks or buy a drink.
00:54:38.000 Because what are they getting out of it if you don't do that?
00:54:41.000 What is this bar getting out of it?
00:54:42.000 You have to pay to do stand-up?
00:54:45.000 Yeah.
00:54:45.000 Wow.
00:54:46.000 And you're doing it for other comics.
00:54:48.000 So you're not doing it for like audience usually.
00:54:50.000 Sometimes, but most of the time.
00:54:53.000 And people still don't quit.
00:54:55.000 Wow.
00:54:55.000 You think you would weed them out.
00:54:57.000 What kind of an audience are you talking about?
00:54:58.000 Like how many people are supposed to be there?
00:55:00.000 I mean, I haven't done it in a long time, but when I was doing it, say there's 15 comics on the mic, you're doing it for those 15 people.
00:55:06.000 And if it's a random bar, maybe some people will come in off the street or at the bar, but yeah, you're doing it for comics.
00:55:11.000 So you're paying to do comedy to your peers?
00:55:15.000 Yes.
00:55:16.000 Wow.
00:55:18.000 Why am I surprised by that?
00:55:19.000 I don't know.
00:55:21.000 What?
00:55:22.000 Go ahead.
00:55:22.000 It sounds a lot like that.
00:55:24.000 Why not just go to stand-up school then or classes or whatever, you know?
00:55:26.000 Well, I think it is stand-up school.
00:55:29.000 But it's like there's no teacher.
00:55:31.000 Right.
00:55:31.000 But it is stand-up school.
00:55:33.000 It's just like you're on a path.
00:55:37.000 Yeah, I mean, that's...
00:55:38.000 I know in other places, like my friend had come from Seattle and was doing stand-up.
00:55:42.000 She said, like, in Seattle, there's an actual audience.
00:55:45.000 Like, you know, there might be a hundred people, so it's a show.
00:55:47.000 Yeah.
00:55:48.000 But in New York, that's not...
00:55:49.000 It's a lot of comics in the audience.
00:55:51.000 Hmm.
00:55:54.000 Comics who are, like, looking at their own notes and not necessarily paying attention.
00:55:57.000 Do any of the good clubs have open mics?
00:55:59.000 Like, does the cellar have an open mic night?
00:56:01.000 No.
00:56:02.000 I know The Stand has an open mic night and maybe New York Comedy Club...
00:56:07.000 I think you kind of have to have an open mic night.
00:56:10.000 The seller doesn't.
00:56:13.000 It seems like it would be better if they did.
00:56:15.000 I know it wouldn't be better financially.
00:56:18.000 No, but if you did it during the day when you're not having shows anyway.
00:56:22.000 It's just people need places to go up.
00:56:25.000 It's like if your growth process is dependent upon you doing stand-up in front of 15 comics...
00:56:32.000 Well, that's why, you know, you start barking or I would intern for like 10 hours on a Friday night seating the customers and then like get a five-minute spot.
00:56:40.000 You'd intern?
00:56:41.000 Yeah, I did wild stuff.
00:56:43.000 Like that's how I came up doing stand-up because I was like the open mics are just like other new comics.
00:56:49.000 So you would intern, meaning you'd work for free.
00:56:52.000 I'd work for free.
00:56:52.000 So that you could do a five-minute set.
00:56:54.000 And a lot of times that set's going to get canceled.
00:56:58.000 So you'd work for free?
00:57:00.000 Work for free.
00:57:01.000 And then never get compensated?
00:57:02.000 No.
00:57:03.000 You either sometimes get a spot or sometimes didn't.
00:57:06.000 Wow.
00:57:07.000 So you'd work for free for 10 hours?
00:57:09.000 Yeah.
00:57:09.000 For a five-minute spot?
00:57:11.000 Mm-hmm.
00:57:11.000 That may not happen.
00:57:13.000 Well, that will fucking weed out the week.
00:57:16.000 Yeah, but my family life was so dysfunctional that that seemed normal.
00:57:21.000 I was like, this seems average to me.
00:57:26.000 Just used to disappointment?
00:57:27.000 Yeah, you're just used to it.
00:57:29.000 You're like, this seems average.
00:57:30.000 This seems like what I've been dealing with.
00:57:32.000 Wow.
00:57:33.000 Well, you found your tribe.
00:57:36.000 I found my tribe.
00:57:38.000 Yeah.
00:57:41.000 Wild tribe.
00:57:42.000 It's just so interesting when you meet someone like Ari, like when I met him at the very beginning and see him now.
00:57:47.000 It's funny.
00:57:49.000 It's fascinating watching these broken toys meander their way through our society.
00:57:56.000 It's funny.
00:57:56.000 Me and him were talking last night at your club, and he was just talking about, I guess, dating people and stuff.
00:58:02.000 And he's like, well, you and I are broken.
00:58:04.000 I was like, what are you talking about?
00:58:06.000 He's like, Adrian.
00:58:08.000 He's like, nobody's going.
00:58:10.000 They want to date somebody like you.
00:58:12.000 He's like, you need a lot of time to yourself.
00:58:14.000 And I was like, oh, he's not wrong.
00:58:16.000 Yeah.
00:58:17.000 And he's the same way, too.
00:58:18.000 He was telling me about this couple he had met that they're married 40 years, but they live in different houses.
00:58:26.000 And he's like, they have a great relationship.
00:58:29.000 They don't fight about the little things that a lot of people do when you live together.
00:58:32.000 And he's like, they have a great relationship.
00:58:33.000 And I was like, that's not the worst idea.
00:58:36.000 It's not the worst idea.
00:58:38.000 The idea that you have to be in the same house together.
00:58:41.000 It's like, says who?
00:58:43.000 People like a little space.
00:58:44.000 Yeah, I mean, at one point I had a two-bedroom apartment.
00:58:47.000 Me and my ex-boyfriend slept separately.
00:58:49.000 I mean, we also had a terrible relationship, but we had our own bedrooms.
00:58:54.000 I wouldn't be opposed to that.
00:58:56.000 It doesn't seem like the worst thing in the world.
00:58:58.000 But whenever you see a couple where they don't sleep in the same bed anymore, you're like, oh, sad.
00:59:02.000 I know.
00:59:03.000 We all judge them, but I'm like, they're sleeping great.
00:59:06.000 That's Mark's room over there.
00:59:08.000 I sleep over here.
00:59:10.000 I know, but if you say it like, that's his room, this is my room, I think you gotta figure out how we were saying it.
00:59:15.000 Yeah.
00:59:16.000 And then also, some people like to sleep in the room really fucking cold.
00:59:21.000 That shit's annoying if you don't like that.
00:59:23.000 I like a fan all year round.
00:59:25.000 I like the noise.
00:59:27.000 The noise.
00:59:27.000 Yeah.
00:59:28.000 There's something about static noise that does help you sleep.
00:59:31.000 Yeah.
00:59:32.000 I just like it.
00:59:33.000 I like the sound of an air conditioner in the summer.
00:59:36.000 I slept at this house in Malibu once by the ocean.
00:59:42.000 We rented it out for a couple months.
00:59:45.000 When you're in bed and you just hear the shh, That sounds like really relaxing.
00:59:52.000 It is.
00:59:53.000 It's weird.
00:59:55.000 It's like hypnotic.
00:59:56.000 Yeah.
00:59:58.000 And it's also so powerful.
01:00:00.000 You're laying down at the base of just insane force of nature.
01:00:06.000 This immense body of water.
01:00:09.000 And you've got the audacity to sleep at the edges.
01:00:13.000 At the edges where this impossible amount of water laps up.
01:00:18.000 That's where you want to put your house.
01:00:19.000 I've had nightmares about, like, just a tsunami just, like, engulfing my house.
01:00:25.000 I loved being at that place, but it was very illuminating.
01:00:28.000 It's very illuminating why rich people want to live, like, right on the water in Malibu, because I was like, why do they want to live right next to each other like that?
01:00:34.000 That's crazy.
01:00:34.000 And then you, like, rent a house there, and you're like, oh, I get it.
01:00:38.000 This is, like, magic.
01:00:40.000 There's something magic about the water being rent for you.
01:00:42.000 I would love to live on a beach.
01:00:43.000 It's magic.
01:00:45.000 It's, like, it gives you magic energy.
01:00:46.000 It's crazy.
01:00:48.000 There's something about it, like being right there.
01:00:50.000 It's like, wow, this feels like I'm on a drug.
01:00:52.000 And it's so calming.
01:00:54.000 So calming.
01:00:55.000 But at nighttime, it's terrifying.
01:00:57.000 The same water that looks so inviting in the daytime.
01:01:00.000 It's blue, and you see the seagulls, and it's beautiful.
01:01:04.000 At nighttime, it becomes an angry monster that can swallow civilization.
01:01:09.000 Just dark, dark black.
01:01:12.000 You don't know what.
01:01:13.000 You can't see anything.
01:01:14.000 You don't know what.
01:01:15.000 It's an immense thing.
01:01:17.000 And at any point in time, the earth could just have a little shift, and then a fucking big one comes in.
01:01:25.000 And just all the way to Arizona.
01:01:28.000 Just all the way to Arizona.
01:01:31.000 I think anything at night is a lot scarier.
01:01:33.000 Oh, yeah.
01:01:33.000 Like, I'll come home 3 o'clock at night and I'll have to park two blocks away and I'm just like...
01:01:37.000 I have, you know, pepper spray in my hand and I have the whole thing.
01:01:40.000 Yeah.
01:01:41.000 Whereas during the day, it's, like, just different.
01:01:43.000 I know.
01:01:44.000 Some things are really scary, but only in certain circumstances.
01:01:50.000 Like, babies are never scary.
01:01:53.000 But...
01:01:54.000 If you were in a moonlit forest, and you're walking through the forest, you saw a naked baby just staring at you by itself, you would shit your pants.
01:02:03.000 I would definitely not help it.
01:02:05.000 If you saw a baby just standing upright, just looking at you naked, a moonlit forest in the middle of nowhere, you had to hike in, and you see a naked baby, you're like, I gotta get the fuck out of here.
01:02:16.000 Yeah.
01:02:18.000 First of all, I'd be like, where's this kid's parents?
01:02:20.000 Right, for sure.
01:02:21.000 For sure you'd be aware of this kid's parents.
01:02:23.000 But you'd also be like, why is there a naked baby staring at me like a grown person?
01:02:27.000 It's gotta be evil.
01:02:29.000 Right.
01:02:29.000 Anything at night like that, it's evil.
01:02:31.000 You'd think it's a demon.
01:02:32.000 And during the day, you're like, look at this baby, it's standing.
01:02:34.000 If I was a demon, I would disguise myself as a baby.
01:02:37.000 It's a good move.
01:02:38.000 Everybody thinks you're cute.
01:02:40.000 Or a cute dog.
01:02:41.000 Or a cute dog.
01:02:43.000 Yeah.
01:02:44.000 Definitely not that whippet.
01:02:46.000 Yeah.
01:02:46.000 They were kind of cute.
01:02:47.000 They still had a cute face.
01:02:49.000 You know, they didn't have a mean, like, pit bull-looking face.
01:02:51.000 They had a cute whippet face.
01:02:53.000 Yeah, I would pick something else over it.
01:02:54.000 They have cows like that, too.
01:02:56.000 Really?
01:02:56.000 Yeah.
01:02:56.000 When Nile and Jack, they look like greyhounds.
01:02:59.000 Yeah, they do.
01:03:00.000 Whippets are really fast, too.
01:03:01.000 That's what they look like normal.
01:03:02.000 They look like a greyhound.
01:03:03.000 Yeah, real similar.
01:03:04.000 So what is the difference?
01:03:05.000 A little cutie.
01:03:05.000 Look at that little cutie.
01:03:07.000 It's this myostatin inhibitor gene.
01:03:09.000 This gene is fucked up on some of them.
01:03:13.000 Oh, it's related to the greyhound.
01:03:14.000 That makes sense.
01:03:15.000 It looks like I like it.
01:03:16.000 And apart from its smaller size, closely resembles it, sometimes described as a poor man's greyhound.
01:03:21.000 Yeah, they're fast little fuckers.
01:03:23.000 What is that myostatin gene?
01:03:25.000 What causes that?
01:03:28.000 Because it happens in cows, too.
01:03:30.000 They've had it in dairy cows.
01:03:31.000 It's crazy.
01:03:32.000 Like, you see a cow just fucking super hulk.
01:03:34.000 So if you drink that milk, are you going to get ripped from it?
01:03:36.000 No.
01:03:36.000 No, it's a gene thing.
01:03:38.000 It's an inherited muscular disorder.
01:03:42.000 Kids have had it, too.
01:03:43.000 Human kids have gotten it.
01:03:44.000 Really?
01:03:44.000 Yeah, which is crazy.
01:03:45.000 You see, like, a baby that looks like a bodybuilder.
01:03:47.000 It's weird.
01:03:48.000 It's a deficiency.
01:03:49.000 Yeah, it's myostatin.
01:03:51.000 Myostatin deficiency whippet type is an inherited muscular disorder affecting whippets.
01:03:55.000 Dogs that inherit two copies of the mutation associated with myostatin deficiency.
01:03:59.000 Whippet type have broad chest and overly developed muscles, especially of the neck and legs, as well as an overbite.
01:04:06.000 See if you can find that in cows.
01:04:09.000 Just write myostatin cows.
01:04:13.000 Yeah, so look at that cow.
01:04:15.000 Look at the size of a dairy cow.
01:04:16.000 That's a girl.
01:04:17.000 Look how jacked she is.
01:04:19.000 I wonder if that's more attractive to the bulls.
01:04:22.000 I wonder, right?
01:04:24.000 Are they like, that one's hot.
01:04:25.000 Like a guy who's into CrossFit chicks?
01:04:27.000 Yeah.
01:04:28.000 Yeah.
01:04:29.000 Isn't that wild?
01:04:31.000 Look at the size of that goddamn thing.
01:04:34.000 Born without the protein myostatin.
01:04:36.000 Yeah.
01:04:38.000 So myostatin, I guess, is what regulates muscle growth.
01:04:42.000 And if you don't have it, it's not regulated.
01:04:45.000 That's why.
01:04:46.000 They were experimenting with that with human beings, too.
01:04:49.000 And I know, I'm sure Eastern Bloc countries are doing that for the Olympics and shit like that.
01:04:54.000 I would imagine.
01:04:57.000 But yeah, they did it to mice.
01:04:59.000 Look at the musculature on these mice.
01:05:01.000 That's crazy.
01:05:01.000 What's crazy is they just skin these mice and we don't give a fuck.
01:05:04.000 If I see one of those in my house, I'd move out.
01:05:07.000 Look at the fucking back on that dude.
01:05:12.000 People have been born with it too.
01:05:15.000 I know that there was, like, a German boy that was born with it.
01:05:18.000 He was fucking jacked, like a little kid.
01:05:21.000 That's crazy.
01:05:22.000 Yeah.
01:05:23.000 So, like, how's that kid gonna play sports?
01:05:25.000 Like, what's gonna happen?
01:05:26.000 That's not fair.
01:05:27.000 It's like, you're playing sports with the Hulk.
01:05:30.000 I mean...
01:05:31.000 We'll find out in like 15 years.
01:05:34.000 Yeah, I guess we will.
01:05:35.000 The greatest running back of all time.
01:05:37.000 What if he's like, I just like playing chess.
01:05:39.000 I really don't want to be on the football team.
01:05:41.000 He's like the Hulk playing chess.
01:05:42.000 Yeah.
01:05:43.000 Yeah, maybe.
01:05:44.000 Maybe he rebels because everybody wants him to get into physical pursuits.
01:05:47.000 He's like, fuck you.
01:05:48.000 Yeah, look at that kid.
01:05:49.000 Net nuts.
01:05:50.000 Vietnamese boy.
01:05:51.000 So he's got it.
01:05:53.000 That dude's going to be popular in high school.
01:05:56.000 That is crazy.
01:05:58.000 Nuts!
01:05:59.000 Isn't that nuts?
01:06:01.000 Imagine going to school with that kid, you'd be so jealous.
01:06:03.000 Like, goddammit.
01:06:04.000 Wouldn't you love it if he's your brother, though, and anyone picks on you?
01:06:07.000 Unless your brother wants you to fucking eat shit.
01:06:10.000 Well, that's true.
01:06:11.000 He makes you eat shit, but he also sticks up for you at school.
01:06:13.000 Yeah, if he's a good brother.
01:06:15.000 But if your brother's mean and he's got that, you're fucked.
01:06:18.000 I feel like you torture your brother or sister, but you don't let somebody else do it.
01:06:24.000 I know guys that had terrible brothers who beat them up all their life.
01:06:30.000 But did they let other people also beat them up?
01:06:34.000 If someone's beating you up, but they protect you from being occasionally beaten up by others?
01:06:39.000 It's the price you pay.
01:06:40.000 I'm not willing to make that.
01:06:42.000 You have to sleep in the same fucking house as that asshole.
01:06:45.000 Yeah, but your parents hopefully are there sometimes and they're stopping it sometimes.
01:06:49.000 Oh, now you're unrealistic.
01:06:51.000 He's going to make a fighter.
01:06:53.000 Yeah, you do make fighters.
01:06:54.000 That's what I'm talking about.
01:06:55.000 A lot of the guys that I'm talking about are fighters.
01:06:57.000 They were just really beaten up by their brothers.
01:07:00.000 And they're the scariest guys, because they're not afraid to fight, because they fought their whole life.
01:07:05.000 And it doesn't matter if they're little either.
01:07:07.000 They're scrappy.
01:07:09.000 Yeah, one of the best guys ever in the UFC, Matt Hughes, former welterweight champion, had a brother who was his twin.
01:07:16.000 And they were both, like, elite wrestlers, and they both just beat the fuck out of each other.
01:07:22.000 And it led to him becoming the UFC welterweight champion of the world, and one of the greatest of all time.
01:07:27.000 I mean, that is...
01:07:28.000 It's just like the guy that went to prison and became a lawyer.
01:07:30.000 It can happen that way.
01:07:31.000 Yeah.
01:07:31.000 A negative turned into a positive.
01:07:33.000 Mm-hmm.
01:07:33.000 Yeah, I can see it that way.
01:07:38.000 I knew another dude, though.
01:07:39.000 He got beat up by his brother and it just destroyed his confidence his whole life.
01:07:43.000 His whole life.
01:07:44.000 I became friends with him in my 20s.
01:07:46.000 That sucks.
01:07:47.000 It was a bummer, man.
01:07:48.000 He could just not get past it.
01:07:51.000 He had never done MDMA. I hadn't either at the time.
01:07:55.000 I wonder if that would have helped him in any way to just recognize what the root of it was, but it just really fucked with his confidence.
01:08:02.000 He would get, like, really close to getting good at stuff, but he almost had, like, this self-defense, self-sabotage thing that would kick in because everybody had always taken things from him.
01:08:13.000 Like, it had always been, like, he thought things were going to go well and his brother just fucked it up and beat him up or took things from him, humiliated him.
01:08:21.000 And so he never felt, like, real success.
01:08:25.000 So he was always scared to, like...
01:08:28.000 Progress in life.
01:08:29.000 So he'd always self-sabotage his life.
01:08:31.000 Because he just thought everything was going to turn to shit.
01:08:33.000 But he was a good guy and a smart guy and just trapped by this childhood, you know, repeated beatings that he got.
01:08:42.000 Alright, well maybe it's not great always.
01:08:46.000 Maybe it's not always going to turn out well.
01:08:48.000 Sometimes it's good though.
01:08:49.000 Sometimes it's good.
01:08:51.000 If the brother's a good guy, if you're both good people, like you know, brothers fight and they make up and they apologize.
01:08:57.000 Sure.
01:08:58.000 Just like friends do.
01:08:59.000 You know, friends fight and make up when you're young.
01:09:03.000 Me and my sister would fight a lot.
01:09:05.000 Fist fight?
01:09:06.000 Yeah.
01:09:06.000 You're three years apart.
01:09:08.000 I remember my mom was still hitting me until I was about 16. And then at one point I was like, hey, I'm going to hit you back.
01:09:15.000 And then she stopped.
01:09:16.000 Because at some point you become almost like...
01:09:18.000 Right, right.
01:09:19.000 Yeah.
01:09:19.000 But that's kind of how we grew up.
01:09:22.000 My mom got into a fist fight at my sister's kindergarten graduation.
01:09:26.000 I'm like, you're fighting over fucking kindergartners?
01:09:29.000 No one cares.
01:09:29.000 They've accomplished nothing.
01:09:31.000 Oh my God.
01:09:33.000 I watched a shooting over a high school football game.
01:09:36.000 Oh my god, I saw that too.
01:09:38.000 That was terrible.
01:09:40.000 It's so horrible.
01:09:42.000 So sad.
01:09:44.000 Just such a fucking...
01:09:47.000 Just a terrible thing where just people with their kids and emotions and sports, people get so nutty with their kids with sports.
01:09:57.000 You know, I am big on saying you did a great job and cheering and stuff like that, but I would never yell about the other team.
01:10:08.000 And some parents are like, what about him?
01:10:11.000 What about offense?
01:10:12.000 What about that foul?
01:10:14.000 What about that foul?
01:10:15.000 He's a cheater.
01:10:15.000 He's a cheater.
01:10:16.000 Yelling.
01:10:17.000 Like, that's a six-year-old.
01:10:20.000 Like, are you out of your fucking mind?
01:10:21.000 Like, let him play.
01:10:23.000 It's his play.
01:10:25.000 You should clap when they do a good job.
01:10:27.000 Just say, was it fun?
01:10:28.000 Did you enjoy it?
01:10:30.000 Was it hard?
01:10:31.000 Was it hard to make that goal?
01:10:32.000 Like, talk to them.
01:10:34.000 But don't get too goddamn emotionally invested in a fucking game your kid's in.
01:10:39.000 Like, cheer.
01:10:40.000 Be enthusiastic for them.
01:10:42.000 But fuck.
01:10:43.000 Yeah.
01:10:43.000 People get so hyped.
01:10:44.000 That's a bad call!
01:10:46.000 And they jump up and next thing you know, gunshots.
01:10:49.000 Fuck.
01:10:50.000 That's crazy.
01:10:51.000 Now you've really ended the game.
01:10:53.000 There's no way to even recover from this right now.
01:10:55.000 You've ended your whole life.
01:10:57.000 You've ended your whole life.
01:10:57.000 Your whole life is fucked.
01:11:00.000 I think too sometimes like parents also think they can push their kids to be like great athletes and then they'll be famous.
01:11:07.000 Yeah.
01:11:07.000 Well there's also like your kid's going to do the thing that you didn't do.
01:11:11.000 Right.
01:11:12.000 Yeah.
01:11:12.000 You wanted to do but you didn't do it.
01:11:14.000 What's interesting is my mom kind of got me into stand-up because she did stand-up and then she quit and then she got me into it and then when she saw I was doing some stuff she was like, I'm gonna go back into it.
01:11:24.000 Wow.
01:11:25.000 Yeah.
01:11:26.000 Is she doing it now?
01:11:28.000 She does.
01:11:28.000 She does a lot of urban rooms.
01:11:30.000 Really?
01:11:30.000 Yeah.
01:11:30.000 Is she good?
01:11:31.000 She's funny.
01:11:32.000 I mean, we're a little bit different, but she still has that same dark sense of humor, but she doesn't really do those jokes.
01:11:38.000 Sometimes she'll think of something and she's like, you could do this.
01:11:43.000 One time we were clothes shopping and she'll always say something like, she'll take two larges and she's like, well, one large might be bigger than the other because the kids that are making them, maybe one of the kids was tired.
01:11:54.000 So she'll say stuff like that.
01:11:56.000 And she's like, I can't say that on stage, but you should.
01:11:59.000 So she'll do stuff like that.
01:12:02.000 My whole family was funny, though, growing up.
01:12:05.000 So when did you first think about doing stand-up?
01:12:11.000 I was probably in my early 20s.
01:12:14.000 I always wanted to be on SNL. I never really wanted to do stand-up comedy.
01:12:18.000 I wanted to be on SNL. And then my mom was like, well, if you want to be on SNL, you have to do stand-up.
01:12:24.000 So then I just started doing stand-up and then I started liking it.
01:12:26.000 But I didn't want to be a stand-up comic as a kid.
01:12:29.000 Really?
01:12:30.000 Yeah.
01:12:32.000 Who was the people on SNL? What era was this?
01:12:36.000 Will Ferrell, you know, Chris Farley, those guys.
01:12:40.000 Like that was the people that I kind of grew up with and loved.
01:12:44.000 Molly Shannon, Sherry Oteri, like that whole crew.
01:12:48.000 Yeah, that was a great crew.
01:12:49.000 Yeah.
01:12:50.000 So that's kind of where I was like, oh, I want to do that.
01:12:52.000 And she's like, well, you have to do stand-up.
01:12:53.000 And I had zero interest in doing it.
01:12:55.000 Had you done any drama or anything in school?
01:12:58.000 You know, we did like plays as kids.
01:13:00.000 I was like, in The Sound of Music, I played that lady.
01:13:03.000 Yeah.
01:13:06.000 Doe, a deer, a female deer.
01:13:09.000 That's awesome.
01:13:09.000 So like I did stuff like that.
01:13:11.000 But I just, I don't know, I was always kind of like a class clown as a kid.
01:13:14.000 Oh.
01:13:15.000 So then I wanted to do that.
01:13:16.000 And now I'm like not really the same as that.
01:13:19.000 It's weird.
01:13:20.000 Because you get it all out on stage?
01:13:22.000 No, but I'm just saying I was like a class clown, but I was also like loud and like boisterous where I'm not that same person anymore.
01:13:29.000 Or I don't think I am anyway.
01:13:32.000 What calmed it?
01:13:33.000 I don't know.
01:13:34.000 I think just depression.
01:13:38.000 I don't know.
01:13:39.000 I think as a kid I just, even though my life looking back was not ideal, I still felt really happy.
01:13:46.000 You know, like I didn't realize like all the issues as a kid really.
01:13:51.000 So, I don't know.
01:13:54.000 And then, where'd you start out?
01:13:57.000 Oh, New York City.
01:13:59.000 I'm from New York.
01:13:59.000 I've lived in the Bronx my whole life.
01:14:01.000 So I started in New York.
01:14:02.000 So it's also weird too because you're like starting in a place where people don't move until they're really good.
01:14:07.000 So I started in New York just being shitty.
01:14:11.000 Did you start at a bar?
01:14:13.000 Where did you start?
01:14:14.000 The first place I went to was in Brooklyn.
01:14:16.000 It was I guess an open mic.
01:14:19.000 It was in like a big Italian restaurant.
01:14:21.000 There were four people there.
01:14:22.000 What year was this?
01:14:24.000 2004. My mom was there.
01:14:27.000 My mom went on.
01:14:28.000 She did well.
01:14:30.000 And then I went up and I was like so high energy because I was so nervous.
01:14:35.000 I remember one of my jokes was about like, I was working in the South Bronx as a crimes victims advocate at the time.
01:14:41.000 And I got pulled over for not wearing a seatbelt while someone was selling drugs right near me.
01:14:45.000 And I was like, just the lunacy of it.
01:14:47.000 Where I was like, why am I getting, this guy's clearly selling drugs to somebody.
01:14:51.000 That was like one of my first jokes.
01:14:53.000 Something like that.
01:14:55.000 And then when you got off stage, did you think this is something I'm going to do more of?
01:15:01.000 Yeah, I think because that show went well, even though there were four people, I was like, I'm going to keep doing this.
01:15:07.000 That show went well and there was four people.
01:15:09.000 There were four people.
01:15:10.000 And it was in a huge Italian restaurant that was like closing.
01:15:13.000 Like they were like going out of business.
01:15:15.000 So there was nobody there.
01:15:17.000 Wow.
01:15:19.000 And so then when was the next one?
01:15:22.000 I didn't wait that long, maybe a couple days later.
01:15:25.000 I remember driving into Manhattan and going to do this open mic called Collective Unconscious, and it's wild.
01:15:32.000 There was a guy there at one point that had elephantitis, so he would go on stage naked, and his balls were humongous, and he had this tiny dick, and he was making people uncomfortable because he was naked the whole show, sitting in the audience, and people were like, you gotta wear clothes until you get on stage.
01:15:52.000 And he was like, alright.
01:15:53.000 But he would just be sitting there, like his bare ass is on the chair.
01:15:57.000 Right, so people were like, hey, can you put your clothes on?
01:15:59.000 Yeah, what if I drop a chip?
01:16:00.000 Yeah, can you just wear your clothes until you're on stage doing that?
01:16:04.000 God.
01:16:05.000 But that was like a weird collection of people.
01:16:08.000 Yeah, I would imagine a guy that would fit in there.
01:16:11.000 Just everything like you.
01:16:12.000 The only requirement would be just wear your clothes until you get on stage.
01:16:16.000 And not at first.
01:16:17.000 They let him do that until he was creepy.
01:16:19.000 So if he didn't act like a creepster, he could have just been naked the whole time.
01:16:24.000 Didn't act like a creepster?
01:16:25.000 Yeah, but they were okay with it at first.
01:16:28.000 They were like, all right.
01:16:29.000 And it's not like he did anything great on stage.
01:16:31.000 It was just seeing his huge balls.
01:16:33.000 Which is nuts.
01:16:35.000 I don't know how you're like...
01:16:36.000 How big?
01:16:37.000 Elephant tights, they're like this big.
01:16:39.000 They're huge.
01:16:39.000 So like as big as a head?
01:16:42.000 Maybe like half of that.
01:16:43.000 Half a head?
01:16:44.000 Half a head for one though.
01:16:45.000 So like yeah, maybe that whole thing.
01:16:47.000 And then like you can't even see the dick.
01:16:52.000 Well he wants you to feel bad for him.
01:16:55.000 I didn't even feel bad.
01:16:56.000 I was just like gross.
01:16:58.000 I don't really care about your fucking big balls.
01:17:01.000 Did you find out about the different mics from your mom?
01:17:04.000 No.
01:17:05.000 I went on to, like, there's a couple of websites you go on to where they have a bunch of different open mics and you can do a couple.
01:17:13.000 And I remember it was a lottery.
01:17:15.000 So if there's 30 people and you get picked first, you can pick where on the lineup you want to go.
01:17:19.000 And I would just pick like 30 because I was so nervous.
01:17:22.000 I just stay there for hours.
01:17:25.000 Wow.
01:17:26.000 Wow.
01:17:26.000 Yeah.
01:17:26.000 It's an interesting group of people, though.
01:17:28.000 And then sometimes my mom would come with me, and at that time I was dating a guy who would also come, so the three of us would go.
01:17:35.000 Yeah.
01:17:36.000 Interesting.
01:17:37.000 Were they encouraging?
01:17:38.000 Yeah.
01:17:39.000 You mean my mom?
01:17:40.000 Yeah.
01:17:40.000 And the guy you're dating?
01:17:41.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:17:42.000 I mean, me and him met.
01:17:43.000 We were both brand new.
01:17:44.000 And then my mom was encouraging because I think she was just like, well, maybe you'll hit it and you'll help me.
01:17:49.000 And I was like, it should be the other way around.
01:17:52.000 It's interesting to people that you meet when you're doing open mics.
01:17:55.000 It's a fascinating introduction to this weird world.
01:18:01.000 Of weirdos.
01:18:02.000 Of weirdos and desperation and mental illness.
01:18:06.000 Mental illness.
01:18:07.000 A lot of mental illness.
01:18:09.000 Like really nutty people.
01:18:11.000 Yeah.
01:18:11.000 And you could do anything there.
01:18:12.000 So you could not only do comedy, you could do like poetry, you could sing.
01:18:17.000 So it was like a variety open mic kind of.
01:18:20.000 Wow.
01:18:21.000 And you can get upstairs and show your balls.
01:18:25.000 Yeah, that guy was doing that.
01:18:26.000 Did anybody ever try to do that that had regular balls after that?
01:18:29.000 Because imagine if they found out there was a place you could just get naked in front of people and they had to look at you.
01:18:34.000 I mean, not while I was there.
01:18:36.000 I never seen anyone that was following him with regular balls.
01:18:40.000 They're like, here's the big ball guy and now the small ball guy.
01:18:43.000 Yeah, I mean, that's what I'm asking.
01:18:44.000 Once a precedent is set that you could be on stage naked, is it only if you look weird?
01:18:50.000 I think they would let you do whatever you wanted there as long as it wasn't creeping people out.
01:18:55.000 They'd probably let you go on stage and spread your ass cheeks and stuff in it.
01:18:59.000 I think they would be open to whatever you wanted to do, but you had to try.
01:19:04.000 You could set a precedent every time, you know?
01:19:07.000 Thank God for people like that running those kind of establishments.
01:19:10.000 It was fun.
01:19:11.000 Yeah.
01:19:11.000 And, you know, there was a lot of like, you know, my mom would come sometimes.
01:19:14.000 She'd be like, that guy's really talented, but he would just be like an alcoholic.
01:19:18.000 She'd be like, he's not going to go anywhere.
01:19:19.000 I never seen him after that.
01:19:20.000 But like, yeah, a lot of people in comedy, it's not the funniest people that make it.
01:19:25.000 Right.
01:19:26.000 Yeah.
01:19:26.000 Oh, I remember a lot of people that were really talented in the early days.
01:19:30.000 I'm like, why is this guy not making it?
01:19:32.000 And then there was a lot of people that were really talented and then they were on their way to making it.
01:19:36.000 Like they were doing well and headlining and then they just fell apart.
01:19:39.000 Like something in their life happened or like...
01:19:42.000 Yeah.
01:19:43.000 Schizophrenia.
01:19:43.000 Like there's that with some of them, you know, or some other sort of mental disease.
01:19:48.000 Yeah.
01:19:49.000 Yeah.
01:19:50.000 Sometimes people crack.
01:19:52.000 There's a lot of pressure involved.
01:19:55.000 Just the pressure of constantly performing, doing sets, writing new material, having to sell tickets, doing radio.
01:20:03.000 Sure, yeah.
01:20:03.000 There's a lot of stress in that.
01:20:05.000 And I think for some people, when things start getting more and more hectic, whatever problems that they...
01:20:12.000 And as you get older, too.
01:20:13.000 People that tend to have mental illnesses, they exacerbate.
01:20:15.000 They get worse, rather, when they get older.
01:20:18.000 I could see that, especially if it's not treated.
01:20:20.000 Yeah.
01:20:22.000 So a lot of these people are like, You'd meet them, and then, you know, you did open mics together.
01:20:30.000 Like, you were in the trenches together to start out, and then you'd see them like 20 years later, and it didn't work.
01:20:36.000 Like, they, you know, see them at an open mic night again, and they're still doing kind of the same material.
01:20:41.000 I've seen that too.
01:20:42.000 People that were really talented and they just, you know, lost it to drugs or alcohol.
01:20:48.000 And you're like, oh, that's a shame because that person definitely could have went far.
01:20:51.000 How many people out of the starting class where you were at were the people you remember in the early days are still around?
01:21:00.000 A bunch.
01:21:01.000 I mean, I don't know.
01:21:03.000 I guess I went to a lot of different open mics and shows, so...
01:21:07.000 But there's a lot of people I kind of started with, I guess.
01:21:11.000 I don't know.
01:21:12.000 I guess I remember, like, some...
01:21:14.000 I've also watched people quit, and I've seen the moment they've quit.
01:21:18.000 Mm.
01:21:20.000 I remember being at a show and this guy was like humping the stool and this other guy couldn't get on the show and he saw that and he's like, I can't believe I can't get on the show and then he quit.
01:21:28.000 That was it.
01:21:29.000 He's like, they're letting this guy hump his stool.
01:21:32.000 And then that guy, who I thought would have went far because he was talented.
01:21:37.000 I mean, that humping the stool wasn't great, but he was talented and then all the clubs he worked at closed and he quit.
01:21:42.000 He didn't just go to another club.
01:21:43.000 He just was like, all right, I'm going to sell real estate.
01:21:46.000 Yeah.
01:21:48.000 You have to be really mentally ill to stay the path.
01:21:51.000 Absolutely.
01:21:52.000 That's why I think I did all that stuff and just thought it was normal.
01:21:55.000 I didn't think I shouldn't be treated like this.
01:21:59.000 Yeah, I didn't have a path that was nearly as hard.
01:22:01.000 I was really lucky that in Boston in the 1980s, there was a lot of open mic nights at legitimate clubs.
01:22:07.000 So I started at Stitches, which was a legitimate club in Boston.
01:22:10.000 It was a great club.
01:22:12.000 And on the open mic nights, not only was it an open mic night, but it was hosted by a professional, this guy George McDonald.
01:22:19.000 And then a lot of really good professionals from town would stop in.
01:22:22.000 So you get to see people that were just so much better than you.
01:22:25.000 You could see like these...
01:22:26.000 Brilliant comedians.
01:22:28.000 And so it was a real good scene for development because all the clubs had an open mic night.
01:22:34.000 Every club had an open mic night.
01:22:36.000 Was there audience?
01:22:37.000 Oh, yeah.
01:22:37.000 Oh, okay, yeah.
01:22:38.000 Yeah, you would go to an open mic.
01:22:40.000 When I went to an open mic night, there was like 50 people in the crowd.
01:22:43.000 Oh, yeah, that's a lot better.
01:22:44.000 It was good.
01:22:46.000 It was good because, first of all, they called it comedy hell.
01:22:49.000 It was George McDonald, who was a known stand-up in Boston, so he was headlining all over the place.
01:22:55.000 Anyway, so people knew who he was.
01:22:56.000 And then he would go on.
01:22:58.000 And he was like a real veteran.
01:22:59.000 He'd been doing comedy forever.
01:23:00.000 And he was one of the guys that came up through the ding-ho and...
01:23:03.000 You know that whole When Stand Up Stood Out documentary?
01:23:06.000 Have you ever seen that?
01:23:07.000 Amazing.
01:23:07.000 That was really good.
01:23:08.000 That was all about those guys.
01:23:09.000 Right.
01:23:10.000 And so you could always get people that would go because he would always be funny anyway.
01:23:14.000 It's only like fucking five bucks to get in or something like that.
01:23:17.000 And you go and have a couple of drinks and hopefully somebody funny will come by.
01:23:20.000 And you as an open miker got to go on stage in that environment.
01:23:25.000 It was incredible.
01:23:26.000 It was amazing.
01:23:27.000 So did you mean a lot of comics that like took you on the road?
01:23:29.000 No.
01:23:30.000 No.
01:23:31.000 Mostly what happened was I did well enough in open mics that one guy took me on the road.
01:23:39.000 That was actually George's brother, Warren.
01:23:40.000 Warren McDonald took me on the road.
01:23:42.000 That was the first time I ever got paid.
01:23:43.000 And the second time I ever got paid, someone had introduced me to this guy, Mike Clark, who was Lenny Clark's brother.
01:23:50.000 So I got to open for Lenny Clark the second time I ever got paid.
01:23:56.000 It was insane.
01:23:56.000 That is insane.
01:23:57.000 Because he had already done HBO. And Lenny was super sweet to me.
01:24:02.000 He said, I'm really funny.
01:24:03.000 He gave me a bunch of advice.
01:24:04.000 And then his brother started using me.
01:24:05.000 So his brother would use me to open in these weird little bar shows all over the New Hampshire area, Connecticut.
01:24:14.000 He had gigs everywhere.
01:24:15.000 And you would go and do these fucking crazy bar shows.
01:24:19.000 So I learned how to do stand-up.
01:24:22.000 Mostly from going on the road.
01:24:24.000 Mostly doing bar shows.
01:24:25.000 Right.
01:24:26.000 So like a year in, I was just traveling doing a half an hour.
01:24:29.000 That's how people are doing stand-up outside of New York.
01:24:32.000 Yeah.
01:24:33.000 Didn't you say you don't like performing in Connecticut?
01:24:35.000 Connecticut sucks.
01:24:37.000 It's a terrible state.
01:24:38.000 You know I did like a charity show there and I got taken off stage.
01:24:41.000 They pulled you off stage?
01:24:42.000 Yeah.
01:24:43.000 For what?
01:24:45.000 Oh, I heard about this.
01:24:47.000 That was Connecticut.
01:24:48.000 That was Connecticut.
01:24:49.000 Okay, so what happened?
01:24:50.000 I was like 500 people there.
01:24:54.000 I guess they were making...
01:24:55.000 It was for kids that were less fortunate, I guess, giving them food or opportunities or whatever.
01:25:02.000 I was like, oh, I don't know how this is going to go.
01:25:05.000 So the girl before me is doing really well.
01:25:07.000 She did a joke about pedophiles.
01:25:10.000 I get on stage and I was like, oh, I wasn't going to do my joke about that.
01:25:12.000 But I was like, oh, these people love that joke that she did.
01:25:16.000 And this is allegedly.
01:25:17.000 So I don't know exactly why, but allegedly this is why I think I was taken off stage.
01:25:22.000 So I'm going up.
01:25:23.000 I'm doing well.
01:25:24.000 I'm getting like a applause break.
01:25:25.000 So I'm like, oh, I could definitely do this joke.
01:25:27.000 Yeah.
01:25:28.000 And the joke is about how I want to be rich, but not too rich.
01:25:33.000 I want to stop right before it's okay to fuck kids.
01:25:36.000 And these are very rich people, and I didn't think they were that rich.
01:25:41.000 And one of the punchlines is about comparing poor pedophiles to rich pedophiles, and how a poor pedophile is like a guy that works at UBS that fucks a kid, and it's sad, but how rich people fuck kids, and it's like a party.
01:25:53.000 They're on a boat high-fiving each other.
01:25:55.000 And I did that joke and I lost a lot of the audience.
01:25:58.000 And I was like, okay.
01:26:00.000 And then I did a couple more jokes and it was like definitely different in the room.
01:26:03.000 And then somebody came on stage and got me off.
01:26:06.000 And I was like, what's weird is like everyone's like, aren't you mad?
01:26:10.000 I'm like, no, this is not my first charity show I've gotten taken off stage.
01:26:13.000 Like I shouldn't do these shows.
01:26:14.000 And whenever people ask me, I'm like, I don't think I'm right for this.
01:26:16.000 How many minutes were you in before you told her?
01:26:19.000 So you'd kill him for 15 minutes.
01:26:20.000 Yeah.
01:26:21.000 And I think I can definitely do this joke.
01:26:24.000 Now her joke wasn't as specific, but what I was told later is allegedly there's a guy in the community who was a rich pedophile with a boat that was fucking kids in the community.
01:26:35.000 And I'm like, why would I know that?
01:26:38.000 And I was like, oh, that makes a lot of sense.
01:26:42.000 Damn it, if you didn't do that joke.
01:26:44.000 If I didn't do that joke, I would have been fine.
01:26:46.000 Because they liked me.
01:26:47.000 They really did like me.
01:26:49.000 Oh my god, you're making fun of them and you're being mean to them.
01:26:52.000 I didn't think they were rich enough.
01:26:53.000 I didn't think they were, fuck kids rich.
01:26:56.000 You know what I mean?
01:26:56.000 Well, it was probably just one guy.
01:26:58.000 Yes.
01:26:59.000 Well, okay.
01:27:00.000 But maybe.
01:27:01.000 I don't know.
01:27:02.000 But the pedophile, the rich people pedophile ring is one of the scariest conspiracies.
01:27:08.000 I mean, so I get off stage.
01:27:09.000 I'm fine.
01:27:10.000 Because I think I would have been more upset if I didn't get taken off stage at another charity show.
01:27:15.000 And everyone, the other comic, Corey Rodriguez was like fucking pissed.
01:27:19.000 He was like, aren't you mad?
01:27:19.000 I'm like, hey, listen, if they want me off stage, I'll get off stage.
01:27:23.000 I've already gotten paid.
01:27:24.000 I get that my comedy is not for everybody.
01:27:25.000 And I know that, you know, maybe as an earlier comic, it would have hurt my feelings.
01:27:28.000 I'm like, I get that.
01:27:30.000 So he goes on stage and he's like, he's upset about what happened.
01:27:33.000 And there are people in the audience that are also upset.
01:27:35.000 It was like, I split the room, which is what I do a lot.
01:27:38.000 And then he was like, well, Adrian's still here.
01:27:40.000 So if you enjoyed her, like, let her know.
01:27:42.000 And then people were standing and clapping.
01:27:43.000 So it was like people that I had those people and then people who were clapping when I got taken off.
01:27:48.000 So I was like, yeah, I'm just not doing any more charity shows.
01:27:53.000 Yeah.
01:27:53.000 Well, you don't have to at this point.
01:27:55.000 No, and I just don't think I'm right for it, but I always ask these people, too, because the guy that booked it, Eddie Brill, who...
01:28:02.000 I know Eddie.
01:28:02.000 Yeah, he's a great guy.
01:28:04.000 Boston guy, too.
01:28:04.000 Yes, and he was at the...
01:28:07.000 When I opened for Louis at Madison Square Garden, he was there and saw it, and he was like...
01:28:10.000 I said to him, I go, do you think I'm right for this gig?
01:28:13.000 And he was like, yeah, if they can't take a joke, fuck them.
01:28:15.000 And I'm like, are you sure?
01:28:17.000 Because he had seen a lot of the jokes that I did.
01:28:20.000 And he was like, yeah, I think you'll be fine.
01:28:23.000 You would have been fine.
01:28:24.000 I would've if I didn't do that one joke, but I didn't, how would I know that?
01:28:28.000 How would you know?
01:28:28.000 There's no way to know.
01:28:30.000 The joke was fine if it wasn't for that one neighborhood where that actually happened.
01:28:34.000 How the fuck could you know that?
01:28:36.000 I mean, I've made a mistake of doing a school shooting joke too close to somewhere, so then I would start looking that up.
01:28:42.000 Has there been a school shooting in this area?
01:28:45.000 I was like, I guess that's a new thing to look up.
01:28:48.000 Jesus.
01:28:49.000 There's no way to know that.
01:28:50.000 Yeah, how could you do that?
01:28:52.000 That's a great story, though.
01:28:53.000 Yeah.
01:28:54.000 Sounds like they were okay.
01:28:56.000 They were okay.
01:28:58.000 And there were a lot of people in the audience that were still okay.
01:29:00.000 And they were like, we laughed.
01:29:01.000 We thought it was funny.
01:29:02.000 And they're like, fuck them.
01:29:03.000 Yeah, they probably didn't know anybody who knew somebody who had a kid that got fucked.
01:29:07.000 I think they were just like, hey, also I was like, well that seemed like a you problem.
01:29:12.000 Yeah.
01:29:12.000 Like, don't get mad at me.
01:29:14.000 Not only that, I'm sorry the joke was accurate.
01:29:17.000 Yeah.
01:29:18.000 That's what's crazy.
01:29:19.000 That is what's crazy.
01:29:20.000 Yeah, anywhere else you do that joke in Montana, people are laughing their ass off.
01:29:24.000 You do it there.
01:29:25.000 Yeah.
01:29:26.000 So they were like, no, that's not why you got taken off stage.
01:29:29.000 They're saying that I got taken off stage for an adoption joke.
01:29:33.000 What was the adoption joke?
01:29:34.000 You don't have to tell her.
01:29:37.000 I don't know, but there was a lady who had also adopted a kid and they thought she was interacting with me.
01:29:41.000 They thought that she was angry and she wasn't.
01:29:43.000 When I was talking to her after, she was like, I wasn't upset.
01:29:46.000 Oh, so it was an excuse.
01:29:48.000 I don't know.
01:29:49.000 They're just saying that, yeah.
01:29:50.000 I don't know.
01:29:50.000 So allegedly that's what happened and they're just like, that's not what happened.
01:29:53.000 I'm like, alright.
01:29:54.000 One of my best friends lives in Connecticut.
01:29:58.000 So does one of mine.
01:29:59.000 I love him, but Connecticut, you can suck it.
01:30:02.000 It's weird because, like, I've gone there and done shows opening for Louis and they've been great.
01:30:08.000 Like, there are people there that are fun.
01:30:10.000 But then there's also the other people that are like, don't get comedy at all.
01:30:14.000 This is the problem with Connecticut.
01:30:15.000 It's not a real state.
01:30:17.000 It's a highway between Boston and New York.
01:30:20.000 Sure.
01:30:21.000 And the problem is, there's no hope there.
01:30:23.000 Like, nobody, like, hopes they move to Hartford.
01:30:26.000 I mean, there are people that hope they move to Greenwich, though.
01:30:29.000 Yeah, so you could be with all those boat riding pedophile type people.
01:30:34.000 Maybe.
01:30:35.000 Well, there's a lot of rich folks that live in those havens, right?
01:30:38.000 Where everything's like tucked away and grand manors and huge houses and Great Gatsby type shit.
01:30:45.000 There's a lot of those folks.
01:30:47.000 But they're just like...
01:30:48.000 Yeah.
01:31:05.000 I've met a lot of fun people from Connecticut, but the place itself has a low vibration.
01:31:12.000 It's like there's not a lot of hope and exciting things.
01:31:16.000 It's not like going to Manhattan.
01:31:19.000 It's not like going to Boston.
01:31:21.000 It's not like going to LA. It's not like even like Austin, which is only a million people.
01:31:28.000 It's not like Dallas, where it's fun.
01:31:31.000 It's fucking gloomy.
01:31:33.000 There's something gloomy.
01:31:34.000 They have amazing pizza in New Haven, though.
01:31:37.000 Oh, yeah.
01:31:37.000 I know that pizzeria.
01:31:39.000 Oh, shit.
01:31:40.000 There's a lot of pizzerias in New Haven.
01:31:41.000 I like going to Connecticut because I do like how it is at a slower pace.
01:31:46.000 Like, I've lived in New York City my whole life.
01:31:47.000 I, like, hate it.
01:31:48.000 If I wasn't doing stand-up, I wouldn't live there.
01:31:51.000 That's where Lyme disease came from.
01:31:52.000 The Bronx?
01:31:53.000 Or Connecticut?
01:31:54.000 That sounds about right.
01:31:56.000 That's their contribution.
01:31:57.000 Yeah.
01:31:57.000 Everybody Lyme disease.
01:31:58.000 I don't know if that's true.
01:31:59.000 Isn't it like Lyme, Connecticut?
01:32:01.000 Is that what it was originally?
01:32:03.000 Isn't that something like that?
01:32:05.000 There's a CIA conspiracy about the Lyme disease.
01:32:09.000 What is the CIA saying?
01:32:10.000 No, no, no, no.
01:32:11.000 I mean, not real.
01:32:12.000 Not like the CIA saying.
01:32:13.000 Oh, okay.
01:32:14.000 But like the kooks.
01:32:16.000 And I don't even know if they're kooks.
01:32:18.000 That it was a bioweapon that accidentally got released.
01:32:21.000 That these infected ticks were part of a lab program.
01:32:25.000 I don't know, maybe.
01:32:26.000 Is it like COVID? Just made it alive.
01:32:29.000 But they definitely do things like that in some countries, somewhere.
01:32:33.000 They definitely make bioweapons, but whether or not Lyme disease is one of them.
01:32:38.000 But goddamn, that's a terrible one to get.
01:32:40.000 I know a lot of people that got Lyme disease.
01:32:42.000 But you don't die from it, right?
01:32:43.000 You get fucked up if you don't get it treated quickly.
01:32:47.000 Like, is it like physically debilitating?
01:32:49.000 Oh, debilitating.
01:32:50.000 Depending upon, you know, the severity, obviously.
01:32:53.000 But I know people that have had horrible joint pain, neck pain, spinal pain.
01:32:58.000 That sucks.
01:32:59.000 They're just in agony all the time.
01:33:00.000 Yeah.
01:33:01.000 And then people have just lost all of their, like, energy.
01:33:05.000 They just feel depleted.
01:33:07.000 That sucks.
01:33:08.000 And a lot of times they don't even recognize it in people.
01:33:10.000 Because if you don't get it treated, if you don't get it diagnosed while you still have, like, there's like a bullseye ring around the tick bite when it initially becomes infected.
01:33:20.000 Okay.
01:33:20.000 And if they don't catch that, if they don't find that, then they don't know it's Lyme disease.
01:33:25.000 They don't start treating you with antibiotics.
01:33:27.000 They might think, oh, you know, Seems fine.
01:33:29.000 Your vitals check fine.
01:33:30.000 And then it progresses worse and worse.
01:33:32.000 And my friend's son was five years old and he developed Bell's palsy.
01:33:36.000 So his face went numb.
01:33:38.000 And then finally they realized it was a tick bite.
01:33:42.000 And finally they realized they had Lyme disease.
01:33:44.000 So they gave him antibiotics and he recovered.
01:33:46.000 My friend was fucked up for at least a year.
01:33:50.000 He had lost a shit ton of weight.
01:33:52.000 He got real skinny.
01:33:53.000 I mean it really wrecked him.
01:33:56.000 Lyme disease is rough.
01:33:58.000 That sucks.
01:33:58.000 And it's everywhere.
01:34:00.000 There are so many ticks that have Lyme.
01:34:03.000 It's all over the place on the East Coast.
01:34:05.000 I feel like that's not something in the Bronx.
01:34:08.000 I don't know if it's in the Bronx.
01:34:10.000 There's not a lot of grass in the Bronx.
01:34:11.000 No.
01:34:12.000 But if there's deer, if there's deer, there's ticks.
01:34:15.000 Yeah.
01:34:15.000 Anywhere there's deer.
01:34:17.000 If you see deer and a lot of other animals, there's ticks.
01:34:20.000 Any place where there's ticks, you might have Lyme.
01:34:23.000 If there's deer in the Bronx, they're lost.
01:34:26.000 There's a story about a deer that was like in Locust Point and they were like, this does not belong here.
01:34:31.000 Yeah, they fucked up.
01:34:32.000 Yeah.
01:34:33.000 That sucks though.
01:34:34.000 You guys have coyotes though.
01:34:36.000 You mean people?
01:34:37.000 No, actually coyotes in the Bronx.
01:34:39.000 Where?
01:34:40.000 Really, they've photographed coyotes in the Bronx.
01:34:42.000 Where?
01:34:43.000 Like Van Cullen Park or something?
01:34:45.000 Like in abandoned houses and shit.
01:34:46.000 It's crazy.
01:34:47.000 I wonder where they're coming from.
01:34:49.000 They're all over the world now.
01:34:50.000 Or all over the country, rather.
01:34:51.000 They're in every single state.
01:34:53.000 I have never seen a coyote in the Bronx.
01:34:55.000 Coyote spotted in the Bronx.
01:34:56.000 Look at that.
01:34:57.000 Where in the Bronx?
01:34:58.000 Oh, Riverdale's not really the Bronx, though.
01:35:01.000 Right there.
01:35:02.000 Yeah, but that's Riverdale.
01:35:03.000 What's Riverdale?
01:35:04.000 It's like Bronx Light.
01:35:06.000 That's what people call it.
01:35:07.000 Well, guess what?
01:35:08.000 Just because you saw him there, he's on a street.
01:35:10.000 He doesn't know he's in Bronx Light.
01:35:12.000 He doesn't know that.
01:35:12.000 He thinks he's in the Bronx.
01:35:14.000 But he's not.
01:35:16.000 He's in Bronx light.
01:35:17.000 Some place where someone threw out pizza.
01:35:19.000 Okay.
01:35:19.000 Over the last several decades, coyotes have been expanding their natural range in response to ample food and open habitat, the Parks Department said in the statement.
01:35:27.000 Coyotes are living within the city limits.
01:35:28.000 We're aware of coyotes living in the Bronx, Queens, and Manhattan.
01:35:32.000 Fuck.
01:35:33.000 Yeah.
01:35:33.000 How about that?
01:35:34.000 I might have to kill a coyote.
01:35:36.000 If you kill them, they just make more babies.
01:35:39.000 That's why they're here.
01:35:40.000 That's literally why they're here.
01:35:41.000 When you kill coyotes, the female coyotes know that one of them's missing, so they make more pups.
01:35:47.000 I mean, you think they know this one's in the Bronx by itself?
01:35:50.000 I don't think it's by itself.
01:35:52.000 You think it's with other people?
01:35:53.000 100%.
01:35:53.000 100%.
01:35:55.000 They're pack animals.
01:35:55.000 They're also cute, too.
01:35:57.000 They're adorable.
01:35:58.000 Until they're jumping over a fence with your chicken in their mouth.
01:36:02.000 If I had to, I would kill it.
01:36:04.000 Oh, yeah.
01:36:04.000 Save my dog.
01:36:05.000 For sure you would.
01:36:06.000 You'd have to.
01:36:06.000 But it is really cute.
01:36:07.000 It looks like a dog.
01:36:08.000 Well, if you live here, you can carry a gun.
01:36:10.000 A coyote runs up on you.
01:36:11.000 Blast them.
01:36:12.000 The coyotes out here, they don't even yell.
01:36:14.000 I went to a gun range, and I was like, oh, I love this.
01:36:19.000 I would love a gun.
01:36:20.000 But I think I would...
01:36:20.000 I couldn't have it in the Bronx.
01:36:22.000 No, it's not legal, unfortunately.
01:36:24.000 That's not why.
01:36:25.000 I think I would just, anytime someone did something, I would just...
01:36:27.000 You would shoot people?
01:36:28.000 Yeah.
01:36:28.000 I have very bad road rage.
01:36:30.000 I think it's just from living in New York City my whole life and driving.
01:36:33.000 Yeah.
01:36:33.000 Yeah, it's not good.
01:36:34.000 Maybe you should move to Connecticut.
01:36:36.000 No fucking way.
01:36:37.000 Have a nice rural life.
01:36:39.000 I have to be rich to live there.
01:36:42.000 Would you live in one of those houses?
01:36:43.000 One of them great Gatsby houses?
01:36:45.000 I don't want a big house like that.
01:36:47.000 Those houses are crazy.
01:36:49.000 Yeah, I don't need something extravagant like that.
01:36:51.000 Show me some of them crazy...
01:36:52.000 What is it?
01:36:52.000 What's that one town?
01:36:54.000 Well, it's the Gilded Age, but...
01:36:55.000 What is that one town?
01:36:57.000 I want to live in Westchester.
01:36:59.000 Westchester's nice.
01:36:59.000 It's still pretty close to Manhattan.
01:37:00.000 That's nice.
01:37:01.000 Yeah, I don't know.
01:37:02.000 That's like an estate.
01:37:03.000 Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.
01:37:05.000 Succession type shit.
01:37:06.000 Yeah.
01:37:06.000 Look at that house!
01:37:07.000 Where is that?
01:37:08.000 That is insane.
01:37:09.000 That's Connecticut.
01:37:11.000 Those people are fucking kids.
01:37:12.000 These people are wild.
01:37:14.000 Yeah, that's insane.
01:37:15.000 Who the fuck wants that?
01:37:16.000 That's wild money.
01:37:16.000 Look at that one in Eureka, California.
01:37:18.000 Holy fuck.
01:37:18.000 It's cool, though.
01:37:19.000 Where's Eureka?
01:37:23.000 I feel like it's in Orange County.
01:37:25.000 That's where they found gold, I guarantee you.
01:37:27.000 Eureka!
01:37:29.000 Yeah, that's in New York.
01:37:30.000 Westbury.
01:37:31.000 Wow!
01:37:31.000 Look at that beautiful house.
01:37:33.000 200 acres.
01:37:34.000 Who wants that?
01:37:34.000 Me.
01:37:35.000 Yeah, I don't.
01:37:36.000 I've lived in like a one...
01:37:37.000 Want a helicopter landing pad?
01:37:38.000 That's actually cool.
01:37:40.000 I want to see the ones in Connecticut, though.
01:37:41.000 Can you see mansions?
01:37:44.000 There's one area of Connecticut where my friend that I was talking about earlier, he actually works at a school there.
01:37:50.000 He lives in Connecticut.
01:37:51.000 And he said, like, all these people are billionaires.
01:37:55.000 They all have these preposterous houses.
01:37:59.000 I mean, it's so much of a house to keep up with.
01:38:02.000 It definitely is.
01:38:02.000 I guess you're rich though, so you're not keeping up with the Joneses.
01:38:04.000 There's not like a website that details them.
01:38:06.000 Because they're like pretty famous for being extravagant.
01:38:08.000 And they're also, everyone's keeping up with the Joneses.
01:38:11.000 So there's like, you know, the guy who's the CEO of biotech down the road.
01:38:15.000 He's got a bigger house.
01:38:16.000 We're going to expand our pool.
01:38:18.000 And so they're all going ham.
01:38:21.000 You've got to do something with that hedge fund money.
01:38:23.000 Yeah, I guess.
01:38:24.000 I don't know if I'd do that.
01:38:25.000 What would you do?
01:38:26.000 I don't know.
01:38:27.000 Am I still doing comedy?
01:38:28.000 Yeah.
01:38:29.000 You're not going to stop doing comedy.
01:38:31.000 I don't know.
01:38:33.000 I honestly love animals.
01:38:34.000 I would love to have a sanctuary for animals.
01:38:37.000 Not all animals, obviously.
01:38:39.000 I should have brought Marshall.
01:38:40.000 You should have brought Marshall.
01:38:41.000 I didn't know you're such an animal lover.
01:38:44.000 You'd want to steal him.
01:38:45.000 I know.
01:38:46.000 He's really cute.
01:38:47.000 Aren't you guys going to bring your dogs to go play?
01:38:51.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, me and him, yeah.
01:38:52.000 His dog Bandit, she's awesome.
01:38:54.000 Or he's awesome.
01:38:55.000 He calls it a girl sometimes, but I think it's a boy.
01:38:57.000 No, I think it's a girl.
01:38:58.000 Is it?
01:38:59.000 I'm pretty sure it's a girl.
01:38:59.000 He calls it a boy sometimes, too, though.
01:39:01.000 Yeah, it's a girl, though.
01:39:04.000 He makes out with it.
01:39:05.000 Yeah, he's making out with my dog.
01:39:06.000 I took my dog here also.
01:39:09.000 Yeah, that is weird.
01:39:11.000 He could die.
01:39:13.000 Ari would be okay with that.
01:39:15.000 I think Ari feels like he lives his life to the fullest, and if he died at any point, he'd be like, okay.
01:39:20.000 I better be shitting his pants the last few hours.
01:39:22.000 Like if he was on that submarine?
01:39:24.000 Yeah.
01:39:25.000 Those people finally died, I think.
01:39:27.000 Well, we're not going to know.
01:39:31.000 What they said is that if they made it all the way to the bottom, unfortunately the bottom is just mud, undulating mud, and they might have just sunk right into it.
01:39:43.000 It's horrific when you hear that they've had moments in the past where they lost contact for hours With with other subs and they're still doing it the same way Like that that whole thing is so insane that sub can't pilot itself There's no line attached to it.
01:40:01.000 It just goes down to remote control that's controlling the boat has to be above it for it to work and What's interesting to me is, like, these people went down there to go see the Titanic.
01:40:09.000 If you told me I could watch that on TV, I still wouldn't want to watch it.
01:40:13.000 Like, I can't imagine doing that.
01:40:15.000 Brian Simpson pointed this out yesterday.
01:40:16.000 This is what's even more insane.
01:40:18.000 They're not even seeing it through, like, a big window.
01:40:21.000 Oh, right.
01:40:22.000 You were saying that.
01:40:22.000 They're seeing it through screens.
01:40:24.000 There's cameras on the outside of it, and as they pilot it around, they're seeing it on screens.
01:40:28.000 There's like one small window.
01:40:30.000 What is the point?
01:40:33.000 People like to do dangerous shit to say they did dangerous shit.
01:40:36.000 They want to experience things.
01:40:38.000 They want to go to the bottom of the ocean and see the Titanic.
01:40:41.000 I know, but there's a billionaire, but who are the other people that were with him?
01:40:46.000 Well, one of them was one of the guy's son.
01:40:48.000 He was a 19-year-old son.
01:40:49.000 Yeah.
01:40:50.000 Fucking Jesus Christ.
01:40:51.000 That's crazy.
01:40:53.000 Jesus Christ.
01:40:55.000 It's so scary.
01:40:57.000 What a scary way to die.
01:41:00.000 I know, and it's like, it's your own fault.
01:41:02.000 Yeah.
01:41:03.000 That's the other thing.
01:41:04.000 Yeah, you chose to do that.
01:41:05.000 And not only that, there was a small window of time where they could do it because the weather was really bad.
01:41:09.000 Oh.
01:41:11.000 Fuck.
01:41:12.000 But didn't they also make it themselves?
01:41:14.000 No, this company has sent, I think, was it 100 voyages?
01:41:19.000 They've done 100 voyages.
01:41:21.000 No, but I'm saying the actual submarine.
01:41:22.000 Didn't they, like, make this?
01:41:24.000 Yeah.
01:41:24.000 Wasn't people saying they got, like, stuff at Home Depot?
01:41:26.000 Well, there's a company that built it.
01:41:29.000 And the company, apparently, there was a whistleblower who had complained that the hull was not really established to be able to tolerate the amount of pressure that they were putting it under by several thousand feet.
01:41:45.000 A remote-operated vehicle found five major pieces of debris from the submersible about 16,000 feet from the bow of the Titanic, the Coast Guard said.
01:41:54.000 Oh, they're dead.
01:41:56.000 The debris is consistent with the catastrophic loss of the pressure chamber, Coast Guard Rear Admiral John Mauger said.
01:42:03.000 He said it's not yet clear when the implosion took place.
01:42:06.000 The family of those on board were immediately notified about the discovery.
01:42:10.000 We're now believing that our CEO, Stockton Rush, Shazda Dawood and his son, Suleman Dawood, Hamish Harding, and Paul Henry Nargulot have sadly been lost.
01:42:23.000 The Titan sub-operator Ocean Gate said in a statement, these men were true explorers who shared a distinct spirit of adventure and a deep passion for exploring and protecting the world's oceans.
01:42:33.000 Our hearts are with those five souls and every member of their families during this tragic time.
01:42:37.000 We grieve the loss of life and the joy they brought to everyone they knew.
01:42:45.000 Fuck.
01:42:46.000 It says they're unclear now if the victims can be recovered.
01:42:49.000 I don't think people even understand the scope of what you're searching for, like the amount of area you're talking about.
01:42:57.000 Yeah, and then I wonder if you also put more people in danger if you go looking for them.
01:43:01.000 Yeah, you do.
01:43:02.000 You do.
01:43:02.000 I mean, this is...
01:43:05.000 If that whistleblower was correct and it imploded because it wasn't really set up to tolerate the depths that they were putting it under, I mean, that is insane.
01:43:17.000 That's insane.
01:43:18.000 And it's so scary.
01:43:19.000 So scary that people would do that.
01:43:22.000 So scary.
01:43:23.000 They fired the guy who was the whistleblower.
01:43:26.000 And apparently there was a bunch of other people that complained as well.
01:43:30.000 Interesting.
01:43:31.000 Yeah, no, it was a serious thing.
01:43:32.000 Pull up that article again that we looked at.
01:43:36.000 It's not like everyone was like, we all agree this is safe.
01:43:40.000 There was quite a few people that were like, this is not safe.
01:43:43.000 This is not the way to do it.
01:43:45.000 And they had said that they were cleared by one certain body of some group that was examining them, but they hadn't been cleared by them.
01:43:56.000 I don't know.
01:43:57.000 If somebody proposed that to you, wouldn't you be like, absolutely not.
01:43:59.000 Fuck that.
01:44:01.000 Fuck that.
01:44:02.000 Whistleblower raised safety concerns about Ocean Gate Submersible in 2018. Then he was fired.
01:44:07.000 Original carbon fiber hull wasn't rated for Titanic depths, claimed the operations director.
01:44:13.000 It is interesting to go look for the Titanic, and then you also have the same fate as the people on the Titanic.
01:44:20.000 The worst fate.
01:44:20.000 Yeah.
01:44:21.000 Yeah, because you actually knew what you were doing.
01:44:24.000 You were actually going to the bottom in a submarine.
01:44:26.000 They were on something they thought was going to float.
01:44:28.000 They were going to drink tea and look out at the icebergs and shit.
01:44:33.000 Well, also a lot of the rich people, I think, made it off on the Titanic.
01:44:38.000 Yeah.
01:44:40.000 Yeah.
01:44:41.000 Apparently the company had plans to make 3D scans of it, which that's the first time I've heard of that.
01:44:45.000 I don't know if that's what they were doing there, but that's what the company's goal was at some point.
01:44:51.000 Make 3D scans of the Titanic?
01:44:53.000 Yeah.
01:44:53.000 Oh, wow.
01:44:57.000 So they could recreate it somewhere?
01:44:59.000 Yeah.
01:45:00.000 The exact...
01:45:00.000 VR, computer...
01:45:02.000 Oh, wow.
01:45:04.000 Fuck.
01:45:04.000 What is, honestly, the purpose of doing that?
01:45:08.000 People have to do things.
01:45:10.000 They love to do difficult shit.
01:45:14.000 I know, but it's like, do something else.
01:45:16.000 I know.
01:45:16.000 I know, but you can't tell people that.
01:45:18.000 That's true.
01:45:19.000 Like, you know, you can't tell people, hey, stop climbing Everest.
01:45:22.000 Stop.
01:45:22.000 That's true.
01:45:23.000 But at least you're doing that by yourself.
01:45:25.000 You kind of know the risks.
01:45:27.000 I don't know.
01:45:27.000 I mean, this also seems crazy.
01:45:29.000 If somebody was like, would you want to do this?
01:45:30.000 I'd say no.
01:45:31.000 Absolutely.
01:45:31.000 Yeah, of course.
01:45:33.000 But, you know, what makes people skydive?
01:45:36.000 What makes people ride bulls?
01:45:37.000 Thrill seekers.
01:45:38.000 Yeah.
01:45:40.000 Yeah, I don't know.
01:45:42.000 I guess if I was into doing those things, I know right away I'm going to probably...
01:45:46.000 I know exactly what could happen, but something like that where someone's like, hey, this is totally safe.
01:45:51.000 We're all going to be together.
01:45:53.000 I don't know.
01:45:53.000 I just...
01:45:54.000 You fucked that.
01:45:56.000 Yeah.
01:45:56.000 Yeah, it's not totally safe.
01:45:58.000 There's no way it's totally safe.
01:46:00.000 Hey, Jamie, have you seen that bowl that they call God Mode?
01:46:05.000 Somebody sent me this video of there's this bull that they paid 25 million dollars for Because it's so insane when they try to ride it when you see what this bull does to the guy who's right it's I Didn't know a bull could do that.
01:46:19.000 I didn't know a bull could move that way.
01:46:20.000 Look at this bull The bull's name is God Mode.
01:46:26.000 Watch how high the bull gets in the air.
01:46:27.000 It's insane.
01:46:29.000 But, like, you have to know if you do this, you might die.
01:46:33.000 100%.
01:46:33.000 But look at this guy trying to hang on to this bull.
01:46:35.000 Look at the height this bull's reaching.
01:46:38.000 I mean, that bull's flying.
01:46:42.000 That's crazy.
01:46:43.000 Look at that bull fly!
01:46:45.000 And that's the Michael Jordan of bulls.
01:46:47.000 Yeah.
01:46:48.000 Look at the height it's getting.
01:46:49.000 That thing's six feet in the air, seven feet in the air.
01:46:51.000 He is cute.
01:46:52.000 He's adorable.
01:46:54.000 It looks like he's going back.
01:46:55.000 He's just jumping.
01:46:57.000 Not this, but there's a, I don't know, 20 girls standing in a bull ring, and they just let a bull go?
01:47:04.000 Yes.
01:47:04.000 And a couple of them got jacked?
01:47:06.000 Yeah, of course.
01:47:06.000 What is wrong with these?
01:47:08.000 I don't even take the subway in Manhattan.
01:47:10.000 Why would I ever do anything like this?
01:47:12.000 This bull is still jumping, and no one's on him anymore.
01:47:16.000 What are you going to do?
01:47:17.000 You ain't doing shit.
01:47:19.000 You ain't doing shit.
01:47:20.000 But just the fact that the bull keeps jumping like that, even after no one's on him.
01:47:24.000 Like, get the fuck off me!
01:47:26.000 That's why he's god mode.
01:47:27.000 Yeah.
01:47:28.000 But people want to ride that thing.
01:47:29.000 There's someone out there going, fuck it, I'm going to ride god mode.
01:47:33.000 Yeah, I guess.
01:47:34.000 Yeah.
01:47:37.000 Not you, huh?
01:47:39.000 No.
01:47:39.000 Why would I do that?
01:47:40.000 This is a song by Zach Bryan.
01:47:42.000 It's a great song called Open the Gates.
01:47:44.000 And it's about a guy who died riding a bull and his son goes and rides the same bull and dies.
01:47:51.000 I mean, it's like, what do you think is going to happen?
01:47:53.000 It's a great song.
01:47:55.000 The song sounds great, but I mean, come on.
01:47:57.000 Yeah, what is going to happen?
01:47:59.000 This sounds like some TikTok stuff.
01:48:01.000 We saw it go crazy, but I can't find anything else online that says that a bull was sold for $25 million, name God.
01:48:08.000 Well, that could be hardcore shit.
01:48:09.000 But whatever that bull can do is like, Jesus Christ.
01:48:12.000 Those guys, that's a rough life.
01:48:14.000 That's a rough life, bull riding.
01:48:17.000 That is, for me, below getting sex traffic.
01:48:22.000 LAUGHTER I'm like, send me in a container somewhere.
01:48:26.000 I don't trust this bull.
01:48:28.000 It's so weird what people choose to do with their life.
01:48:32.000 Yeah, I mean, I guess, too, if you're a real thrill seeker and you keep doing bigger and bigger things, it must be the same way you get endorphins from it.
01:48:38.000 I don't know.
01:48:39.000 Yeah, 100%.
01:48:40.000 There's also the culture of it, I guess.
01:48:44.000 Who's the biggest risk taker?
01:48:47.000 Yeah, I guess.
01:48:48.000 Right.
01:48:49.000 Bobby's gonna do it.
01:48:50.000 He's fucking crazy.
01:48:51.000 That's right, boys.
01:48:52.000 Right, but that guy might even be scared.
01:48:54.000 He's like, I gotta fucking do this now.
01:48:55.000 Because everyone is like...
01:48:56.000 Come on.
01:48:57.000 It's fake?
01:48:58.000 Well, not fake, because obviously we saw the video, but the most expensive bull sold is $1.5 million in 2020. That one doesn't look like it could jump at all.
01:49:07.000 But is that a breeding bull or is that a riding bull?
01:49:10.000 Even still, a riding bull would be less valuable than a breeding bull, wouldn't it?
01:49:15.000 Because you're just riding it for a couple weeks, and then you have to sell so many tickets to get the money back.
01:49:20.000 Well, I would imagine that riding bulls don't get hurt very often.
01:49:24.000 They only work six seconds at a time?
01:49:26.000 Right, but I bet they can do that anytime they want.
01:49:28.000 Like, if you just see them a couple days off, I bet the riding bulls get right back after it.
01:49:32.000 Like, I'm good.
01:49:33.000 Yeah, I don't think the riding bulls are worried about that little puny person riding its back.
01:49:37.000 Why is it worth $25 million?
01:49:39.000 Because it's so preposterous that everybody's going to want to see God Mode, and everyone's going to see God Mode's children.
01:49:46.000 That's what they do with those things?
01:49:48.000 I know, but that's what they do with those things.
01:49:50.000 Those riding bulls, when they're really dangerous, they breed them.
01:49:55.000 Just like they do with dogs.
01:49:56.000 They breed the most dangerous ones with the most dangerous ones that makes them the most wildest, bucking, insane, psycho bull.
01:50:03.000 Because that's what everybody wants to see you ride.
01:50:05.000 I just don't think they're worth that much.
01:50:07.000 Oh, I believe you.
01:50:08.000 Yeah, I'm sure it's some TikTok shit.
01:50:10.000 This is a dumb question.
01:50:10.000 How do you determine which bulls are going to be riding bulls like that and which ones are just going to be like beef bulls?
01:50:16.000 That's a good question.
01:50:17.000 I wonder if it's a specific type of bull.
01:50:19.000 Does he just act crazy at birth and they're like, that's the bull?
01:50:22.000 Right.
01:50:22.000 How do you know?
01:50:23.000 We made people ride bulls on Fear Factor.
01:50:25.000 And it was one of two times in the history of the show where I was trying to tell the producers, don't do it.
01:50:30.000 Yeah, it sounds like a bad idea.
01:50:32.000 I was like, don't do it.
01:50:33.000 Don't do it.
01:50:33.000 And they're like, they said it's a stunt bull.
01:50:35.000 That's what the fucking stunt guys can say.
01:50:38.000 He's a stunt bull.
01:50:39.000 I go, that bull does not know he's a stunt bull.
01:50:41.000 No.
01:50:42.000 That's a fucking bull.
01:50:43.000 They're like, hey, tone it down for this.
01:50:44.000 And the bull's trying to get out of the cage before the people got on it.
01:50:47.000 And I was like, no way.
01:50:49.000 Don't do it.
01:50:50.000 Because you could get stomped.
01:50:51.000 You 100% could get kicked in the face.
01:50:53.000 And it'll change your life.
01:50:56.000 Don't do that.
01:50:57.000 Wouldn't that also be a huge lawsuit for a fear factor?
01:51:00.000 100%.
01:51:00.000 And they just don't care.
01:51:01.000 They rolled the dice.
01:51:02.000 They rolled the dice.
01:51:03.000 I guess, yeah.
01:51:04.000 Yeah.
01:51:04.000 That's what they did.
01:51:06.000 The other time I told them not to do it, the people had a drink come.
01:51:09.000 But the least that you're not going to die from.
01:51:11.000 I mean, it's gross.
01:51:12.000 You can't die from too much cum, can you?
01:51:14.000 I don't know.
01:51:15.000 I mean, you could definitely die if a bull steps on you, though.
01:51:19.000 Yes.
01:51:19.000 Yeah, you wouldn't die.
01:51:21.000 Did they do that episode of drinking cum?
01:51:23.000 They did.
01:51:24.000 How much cum?
01:51:25.000 A lot.
01:51:26.000 Like a beer stein full of cum.
01:51:28.000 Like this much?
01:51:28.000 More.
01:51:29.000 Like that?
01:51:30.000 Donkey cum.
01:51:32.000 So someone's just jerking these donkeys off?
01:51:33.000 You know why donkey cum?
01:51:34.000 Why?
01:51:35.000 Because donkeys don't breed.
01:51:37.000 Because donkey cum's not good for anything.
01:51:40.000 Because donkeys are a hybrid of a mule and a horse.
01:51:46.000 So this is people that drink donkey piss and donkey cum.
01:51:48.000 I'm going to throw up right now.
01:51:50.000 That's what I'm saying.
01:51:51.000 Do these people have to keep it down?
01:51:53.000 Yeah.
01:51:54.000 No, they throw it up eventually.
01:51:55.000 After they swallowed it, then they were allowed to throw up.
01:51:58.000 So somebody for this show had to jerk off donkeys.
01:52:01.000 Yeah.
01:52:01.000 They actually stick a cattle prod up their asshole and they shoot like a fire hose.
01:52:06.000 Well, at least someone doesn't have to jerk them off.
01:52:09.000 That would be a shitty job.
01:52:11.000 Yeah, they do something where they stick it up his asshole.
01:52:14.000 Yikes!
01:52:15.000 Yeah.
01:52:16.000 I know.
01:52:17.000 That's gross.
01:52:18.000 I gotta be honest though, was it mixed with water?
01:52:20.000 It seemed very liquidy.
01:52:21.000 No, it was thick.
01:52:21.000 It was thick.
01:52:22.000 It seemed liquidy.
01:52:24.000 I thought it'd be more like a milkshake consistency.
01:52:26.000 Yeah, these guys are chucking.
01:52:28.000 So someone got a hold of the footage, like TMZ or something like that, and then NBC pulled the episode from America, but they didn't pull it overseas.
01:52:38.000 So I think it aired in Holland or somewhere like that.
01:52:41.000 Find out where it aired.
01:52:43.000 Wow, the Fear Factor YouTube channel.
01:52:44.000 That's where it is.
01:52:45.000 Oh yeah, you can definitely get it on YouTube.
01:52:47.000 Yeah.
01:52:49.000 So that was a kill the show.
01:52:51.000 Then they're like, that's a wrap.
01:52:52.000 That was the end of the show?
01:52:54.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:52:54.000 They canceled that episode.
01:52:56.000 They never aired that episode.
01:52:57.000 Then they canceled the show.
01:53:00.000 That's so crazy.
01:53:01.000 Over donkey cum.
01:53:02.000 Isn't that nuts?
01:53:03.000 It was awesome.
01:53:04.000 It was perfect.
01:53:05.000 It was perfect.
01:53:07.000 Oh, gross.
01:53:08.000 Perfect way to end.
01:53:09.000 Yeah.
01:53:10.000 Nobody saw it, except in Holland.
01:53:11.000 A lot of people saw it on YouTube, though.
01:53:13.000 I didn't even know that existed.
01:53:14.000 We've talked about it at a gang of times.
01:53:15.000 Oh, okay.
01:53:16.000 So more people ever saw it than they would have seen it if it was on TV. For sure.
01:53:21.000 I don't know.
01:53:22.000 Is it worse to be the person that drank all that cum and then it didn't air?
01:53:27.000 No, it's probably better.
01:53:29.000 But it did air.
01:53:31.000 But didn't you say it aired only in Holland?
01:53:33.000 Yeah, but it airs on YouTube.
01:53:34.000 Oh, yeah.
01:53:34.000 I'm trying to find out.
01:53:35.000 Drinking cum on YouTube is, you're going to get some hits.
01:53:38.000 You're going to get some views.
01:53:39.000 Imagine on a job interview and they're like, did you drink that donkey cum?
01:53:43.000 Were you one of the twins?
01:53:44.000 Because it was twins.
01:53:45.000 And you're like, no, that's my sister.
01:53:46.000 My sister did it.
01:53:47.000 So one had to drink piss, the other one had to drink cum.
01:53:50.000 What would you drink?
01:53:51.000 Piss.
01:53:53.000 Ugh.
01:53:53.000 Cum is chunky.
01:53:55.000 Yeah, it's a lot.
01:53:56.000 A lot of protein.
01:53:57.000 I would imagine it would affect everything in there.
01:54:02.000 Piss is just dirty water.
01:54:04.000 If you're drinking water, you're drinking dinosaur piss.
01:54:06.000 I love it.
01:54:07.000 Do you know that?
01:54:08.000 All water on Earth, at one point in time, if you just think statistically, the hundreds of millions of years of dinosaurs were around, all that water at some point in time was filtered out of a dinosaur's dick.
01:54:20.000 That sounds insane and not true.
01:54:22.000 I think it's true.
01:54:23.000 I don't think that's true.
01:54:24.000 Let's see.
01:54:25.000 I don't know.
01:54:26.000 Okay.
01:54:27.000 All water.
01:54:29.000 How would you Google that?
01:54:31.000 Is your work computer just, like, have the worst stuff on it?
01:54:35.000 It's a separate browser I definitely use.
01:54:37.000 Yeah, well, how would you phrase that?
01:54:40.000 Every glass of water you drink originally was in dinosaur urine.
01:54:44.000 Dinosaur.
01:54:46.000 Or originally it was dinosaur urine.
01:54:48.000 I want it to be urine.
01:54:50.000 I want it to be real specific.
01:54:54.000 All the water you drink came from dinosaur urine.
01:54:57.000 Just be ridiculous.
01:55:01.000 Well, the way I asked it...
01:55:03.000 Someone did ask the question you're asking, right?
01:55:06.000 You are drinking dinosaur pee every day.
01:55:09.000 Here's why.
01:55:10.000 Ooh.
01:55:12.000 Yeah, there you go.
01:55:13.000 Yeah, you are drinking dinosaur pee every day.
01:55:15.000 Here's why.
01:55:16.000 From Tech Times.
01:55:18.000 The average American drinks four cups of water every day according to the U.S. Department of Agriculture.
01:55:22.000 This is far short of the recommended eight glasses, blah, blah, blah.
01:55:24.000 Whether it's tapped, filtered, bottled, sparkling, or sourced from the Himalayan glaciers and sparkled with gold dust, you are actually drinking the liquid waste of an ancient beast, says the science-centric YouTube channel Curious Minds.
01:55:36.000 A video explaining this theory says that every small percentage of all the water in the world is available for drinking purposes.
01:55:42.000 But it's still a huge amount of water to provide for the needs of every human being that's ever walked on the surface of the Earth for the last 200,000 years.
01:55:49.000 Every year, around 121,000 cubic miles of water, about the equivalent of 42 Lake Superiors, falls down on Earth, constantly flows through the rivers, lakes, ground, reservoirs, and everywhere else it passes through, including inside the guts of people and the animals that drink it.
01:56:02.000 So, what do dinosaurs have to do with all this?
01:56:05.000 Unlike humans, who have been on Earth for a tiny fraction of the 186 million years that dinosaurs ruled the planet, The beasts were here far longer than we have ever been.
01:56:15.000 In that long span of time, it's very likely the dinosaurs have drunk all the water available back then.
01:56:21.000 And then all the water available now is simply water that has passed through a dinosaur's kidneys, making its way through the never-ending water cycle.
01:56:31.000 That's crazy that dinosaurs were around for 186 million years.
01:56:36.000 If you told me they were around for 100 years, I would have believed it.
01:56:39.000 I know nothing about dinosaurs.
01:56:41.000 Yeah, they were around forever.
01:56:42.000 If it wasn't for that rock, they'd still be around.
01:56:44.000 That's crazy.
01:56:45.000 And now we get to drink their piss.
01:56:47.000 That's what's interesting about life on other planets.
01:56:49.000 If something like the dinosaurs does exist, it takes something like the Yucatan impact to kill them.
01:56:57.000 And then the little scrambly little rodents and shit eventually evolve to become humans.
01:57:03.000 But if that doesn't happen, forever and ever and ever, it's just dinosaurs fucking things up.
01:57:08.000 And no one ever builds a house.
01:57:09.000 No one ever gets a Tesla.
01:57:11.000 Just pissing.
01:57:12.000 Yeah, every time you go outside, raptors tear you apart.
01:57:15.000 You live in tiny caves, and they try to find you in there, and they drag your kids out.
01:57:20.000 Yeah, they send a little raptor in there and they grab your kid by the feet.
01:57:24.000 You crawl into little tunnels and holes as they nip at you and try to claw away at the rocks to get to you.
01:57:30.000 You never develop tools.
01:57:32.000 You never develop anything.
01:57:33.000 You barely stay alive.
01:57:35.000 You probably go extinct.
01:57:37.000 Somehow that submarine thing sounds less worse than that.
01:57:41.000 Yeah, probably.
01:57:42.000 Being torn apart by a raptor.
01:57:43.000 If you lived in that era, I think everything ate everything.
01:57:46.000 Probably.
01:57:47.000 And the only way you didn't get eaten if you were like a stegosaurus where you're just covered in armor just to keep things from eating you.
01:57:54.000 I mean, imagine like what kind of fucking hard life you have to be living in to develop the kind of skin a stegosaurus has.
01:58:02.000 Just armor everywhere you are.
01:58:04.000 Like a triceratops.
01:58:05.000 Yeah.
01:58:05.000 Everywhere your armor.
01:58:06.000 Yeah.
01:58:07.000 Just to keep you from getting consumed.
01:58:10.000 That's crazy.
01:58:11.000 Yeah.
01:58:13.000 So, that's the bright side of the impact.
01:58:16.000 I'm drinking dinosaur piss.
01:58:17.000 Yeah, we're drinking dinosaur piss, and that's the bright side of apocalypse caused by an asteroid impact.
01:58:23.000 It's not that bad.
01:58:24.000 It's pretty good.
01:58:25.000 It's way better than dinosaurs still being around.
01:58:28.000 And it's way better than Donkey Kong.
01:58:30.000 Yes.
01:58:31.000 Not that I know, but I assume this is better.
01:58:34.000 My coffee is dinosaur piss.
01:58:35.000 Yeah.
01:58:38.000 Yeah.
01:58:38.000 Mixed with other crap.
01:58:40.000 No, just coffee.
01:58:41.000 You don't put anything in it?
01:58:42.000 Like, no milk or anything?
01:58:43.000 No, it's just black.
01:58:44.000 Black coffee's tough.
01:58:45.000 I like to put something in it so it's not as, like, sour.
01:58:48.000 I started getting into it when I became friends with my friend Evan Hafer, who runs Black Rifle Coffee.
01:58:55.000 It's, like, his company.
01:58:56.000 Oh, okay.
01:58:57.000 And he, well, there was a guy I had on a podcast a long time ago that was actually a coffee expert.
01:59:02.000 What was that gentleman's name again?
01:59:04.000 Weird.
01:59:05.000 Juliano.
01:59:07.000 Juliano, right?
01:59:08.000 Yeah, Peter Juliano.
01:59:09.000 Very interesting guy, but he's like a legitimate coffee expert.
01:59:12.000 And I was like, I like talking to people that just know a lot about one thing.
01:59:16.000 Sure.
01:59:17.000 Like, it's weird how much this guy knows about coffee.
01:59:19.000 And he brought a bunch of different coffees to sample, and there's this Ethiopian coffees that tasted almost like they were lemony.
01:59:27.000 And you're drinking them all black, everything black.
01:59:29.000 He's like, real coffee drinkers drink coffee black.
01:59:31.000 Yeah.
01:59:32.000 And so then my friend Evan, who runs Black Rifle Coffee, he's a real coffee nut.
01:59:37.000 He literally goes to these places where they grow it and samples the beans and they have different kinds of roasts and blends and amazing stuff.
01:59:46.000 And he drinks everything black.
01:59:48.000 And I just started drinking it black.
01:59:49.000 I think it's an acquired taste.
01:59:52.000 I've done it before.
01:59:54.000 Like, drink it black with nothing in it.
01:59:56.000 Like, if I'm in a hotel and they don't have anything.
01:59:58.000 But, I don't know.
01:59:59.000 If the coffee's good quality, then you can.
02:00:01.000 Yeah.
02:00:02.000 For me, anyway.
02:00:02.000 But if it's, like, crappy.
02:00:04.000 Yeah, if they fuck it up.
02:00:05.000 If they don't know what they're doing, they fuck it up.
02:00:07.000 But even if I go to a diner, I just drink black coffee.
02:00:10.000 Yeah.
02:00:11.000 I like it.
02:00:12.000 I don't know.
02:00:12.000 Maybe I'll get there one day.
02:00:13.000 It's just the thing where I know it doesn't taste good, but it tastes good to me.
02:00:18.000 I like that sort of bitter, warm, liquid taste.
02:00:21.000 I like it.
02:00:22.000 I like tea with nothing in it.
02:00:24.000 I do, too.
02:00:25.000 Yeah, but coffee's real bitter.
02:00:26.000 But tea with honey's better, isn't it?
02:00:28.000 Yeah.
02:00:29.000 Yeah.
02:00:29.000 But I don't mind that plain as opposed to coffee is like not great.
02:00:34.000 Yeah.
02:00:35.000 Well, I try to avoid sugar as much as possible.
02:00:39.000 And I feel like when I put, even if I put like sweet and low or stevia in something, it makes me want more sweet things.
02:00:44.000 Oh yeah, I get that.
02:00:45.000 Because I like sweet stuff.
02:00:47.000 Of course.
02:00:48.000 So I just avoid it whenever I can.
02:00:51.000 Definitely.
02:00:51.000 That's why I try and cut sugar out because I'm like addicted to it.
02:00:54.000 Everybody is.
02:00:55.000 I think it's like some people aren't though.
02:00:57.000 It's like people that could have one or two drinks.
02:00:59.000 Like I think certain people like process everything differently.
02:01:03.000 I don't know.
02:01:03.000 Yeah, for sure.
02:01:04.000 But sugar's in so many things.
02:01:05.000 You don't realize how much you love it and live off of it.
02:01:08.000 Yes.
02:01:09.000 Yeah.
02:01:09.000 But like some people could have one cupcake.
02:01:12.000 You know what I mean?
02:01:13.000 And then some people are like, I need to chase that sugar.
02:01:15.000 Yeah, have you...
02:01:17.000 You said that...
02:01:19.000 Do you have...
02:01:19.000 How many people in your...
02:01:20.000 You have many people in your family that have had addictive personalities or addiction issues?
02:01:24.000 Addiction issues, yeah, for sure.
02:01:26.000 Drugs and gambling.
02:01:27.000 Drugs, gambling, drinking, food, just like everything.
02:01:32.000 Yeah.
02:01:33.000 Also, I think when your life isn't that great, you look for an escape, so...
02:01:36.000 Absolutely.
02:01:37.000 You know?
02:01:39.000 Are you worried that as your life gets greater and greater, that you'll have less things to be upset about?
02:01:46.000 No, I think I have quite a few things to be said about.
02:01:48.000 I think I'll never run out of stuff.
02:01:50.000 I asked my therapist if he thought I'd ever be cured and he laughed at me.
02:01:53.000 He goes, no.
02:01:54.000 Whoa.
02:01:55.000 He's like, absolutely not.
02:01:56.000 Maybe he just wants to keep you there.
02:01:58.000 Maybe, but he's not making that much off me.
02:02:01.000 I think he'd rather me be in a good place over getting the little bit of money I give him.
02:02:09.000 But he's funny.
02:02:11.000 He's really a funny person.
02:02:13.000 Like, because I did think I had a good childhood.
02:02:16.000 And then, like, I started going to him, and he was like, you had a terrible childhood.
02:02:18.000 Like, I literally said to him, I was like, I thought I had a good childhood because nobody molested me as a kid.
02:02:23.000 And he was like, no.
02:02:24.000 He's like, actually, if somebody did, they would have been showing you attention.
02:02:27.000 He was like, it would have been better.
02:02:28.000 Like, he was joking, though.
02:02:29.000 But I was like, I see what he's saying.
02:02:31.000 Like, yeah, me and my sister were just ignored.
02:02:34.000 But, I don't know.
02:02:35.000 I think I'll always have stuff to be upset about.
02:02:39.000 Stand-up comedy is such an interesting thing because everybody came from like a place of lacking.
02:02:44.000 Right.
02:02:45.000 But everybody's thing, like everything that got them to that is different.
02:02:50.000 But the result is the same with the audience.
02:02:52.000 It's all just like, how do I figure out how to get these fucked up ideas into people's heads and elicit a response?
02:02:59.000 Sure.
02:03:00.000 But a lot of comics, you know, have a lot of mental illness.
02:03:03.000 Yeah.
02:03:04.000 Fucked up childhoods.
02:03:06.000 Sure.
02:03:07.000 You know, you're pulling like, I feel like my family was always very funny because we were always struggling like financially and just like with different stuff.
02:03:14.000 You just kind of always are funny and joking around.
02:03:17.000 That's what I think.
02:03:19.000 Wouldn't you rather prefer fucked up people that joke around a lot to like stuffy people in Connecticut?
02:03:25.000 I mean, it would have been nice if we had money.
02:03:28.000 I think I would have preferred having some financial stability in terms of just having laughs.
02:03:35.000 Yeah.
02:03:36.000 I mean, maybe not now, because I do stand-up, but when you're younger...
02:03:40.000 I mean, I also didn't realize how rich people were, too, until I went to college, and it seemed like people have lots of money.
02:03:46.000 I didn't really realize that as a kid.
02:03:49.000 Yeah.
02:03:51.000 That's probably good.
02:03:54.000 Maybe.
02:03:55.000 I think it really fucks people up when they're like they're poor and they're around rich people because it's like right there.
02:04:01.000 In the Bronx there's like varying degrees like when I was growing up there's like varying degrees of poor you know like like some of my friends parents did have a house but like you're still in the Bronx it's not like you know Connecticut or right but yeah I didn't really slightly doing better poor yeah you're doing a little bit better But as a comic,
02:04:22.000 goddammit.
02:04:23.000 You know comedy is the best thing to do.
02:04:25.000 It's so much fun.
02:04:26.000 And that's the superpower.
02:04:29.000 Fucked up childhood is the superpower.
02:04:30.000 Sure.
02:04:31.000 I see that.
02:04:33.000 But we also did things that were...
02:04:35.000 On vacation, we would go visit my aunt who was dying every year.
02:04:39.000 That was like a vacation from the rest of our awful life.
02:04:43.000 Oh, God.
02:04:44.000 Which is a crazy thing to do as a vacation.
02:04:46.000 Yeah.
02:04:48.000 That sucks.
02:04:50.000 Yeah, but as a kid, I didn't realize it sucked.
02:04:52.000 I realize it sucks now.
02:04:53.000 You didn't realize it until you started doing therapy?
02:04:56.000 No, I realized it once I got older and realized we should not be in a house where someone's dying in the living room.
02:05:03.000 Well, there was her and then another aunt, but yeah, this is not great.
02:05:07.000 We were going to Crescent, Pennsylvania.
02:05:10.000 That's the worst.
02:05:12.000 So is doing stand-up, is that the most joy you've ever experienced?
02:05:17.000 Sometimes.
02:05:18.000 Sometimes not.
02:05:19.000 When it doesn't go well.
02:05:21.000 I don't know.
02:05:22.000 I think that if I had a lot of money, I might just work with animals.
02:05:25.000 Like, I really love animals.
02:05:26.000 Really?
02:05:26.000 Yeah.
02:05:27.000 You'd quit doing stand-up?
02:05:28.000 I don't think I'd quit doing stand-up.
02:05:29.000 I think I'd always do it.
02:05:30.000 But I do love, like, helping animals and, like, even people, too, you know?
02:05:35.000 Like, I make a lot of dark jokes, but, like, I think everyone just thinks I'm an awful person.
02:05:38.000 I'm like, well, these are just jokes, though.
02:05:41.000 Yeah.
02:05:42.000 But, yeah, I would love to work with animals.
02:05:44.000 Like, rehome animals.
02:05:45.000 Like, take, you know, ones in that you can't.
02:05:47.000 Why don't you partner up with Whitney?
02:05:49.000 Do you know Whitney?
02:05:49.000 Yeah.
02:05:50.000 Not really.
02:05:51.000 I mean, we follow each other on Instagram.
02:05:53.000 She's awesome.
02:05:54.000 You would love her.
02:05:55.000 She's so crazy.
02:05:56.000 Yeah, I mean, I follow her account.
02:05:56.000 She has that one dog that looked like an alien.
02:05:59.000 What was the dog's name?
02:06:00.000 I don't remember.
02:06:00.000 Dragon or something?
02:06:03.000 Violet.
02:06:04.000 I think it's Violet.
02:06:04.000 But yeah, so I would love to do that.
02:06:06.000 I wish that stand-up would get to a place where I could be afforded a situation like that.
02:06:11.000 To help animals.
02:06:12.000 Yeah, she's always fostering dogs.
02:06:14.000 She has a horse.
02:06:16.000 Yeah, I would like it if she fostered me.
02:06:19.000 She took people in during the pandemic.
02:06:22.000 She turned her house into like a flop house.
02:06:24.000 Yeah, I saw that.
02:06:26.000 Yeah, she's awesome.
02:06:27.000 She had outdoor shows at her house during the pandemic.
02:06:31.000 They were doing them in New York too.
02:06:33.000 Really?
02:06:33.000 Yeah.
02:06:33.000 In people's yards and stuff?
02:06:35.000 Like Central Park.
02:06:36.000 They did some shows.
02:06:37.000 I did shows on roofs.
02:06:39.000 Like it was just people getting real creative.
02:06:41.000 When did you get back into an indoor club again?
02:06:44.000 What was the first time?
02:06:45.000 How many months out?
02:06:46.000 I don't know.
02:06:46.000 I was doing it about six months after like outside.
02:06:49.000 And then I think I waited to get vaccinated to do it inside.
02:06:53.000 Like the first vaccine maybe?
02:06:54.000 Did you have to get vaccinated?
02:06:56.000 You had to to be in those clubs too, right?
02:06:58.000 Yeah, and I think you had to get vaccinated to definitely go to Europe when I went on that tour with Louis, so we definitely needed, I think, three at that point.
02:07:07.000 You had to have a booster to go over there, too?
02:07:10.000 Yeah.
02:07:10.000 You had to have three.
02:07:12.000 And I think the clubs, you might have only needed two, but I'm not sure.
02:07:15.000 God.
02:07:16.000 There were some comics that refused to get vaccinated, too.
02:07:19.000 Yeah.
02:07:19.000 There was a couple of them.
02:07:21.000 But I was like, I mean, when I took the vaccine, I was like, I'm not 100% confident in this.
02:07:26.000 But I was like, but, like, whatever.
02:07:27.000 I do want to work.
02:07:29.000 Yeah.
02:07:29.000 I was like, what am I going to do?
02:07:30.000 Well, a lot of people did that.
02:07:31.000 They made that choice because they wanted to work.
02:07:34.000 Yeah.
02:07:34.000 And it was very clear that it was going to stop you from working.
02:07:37.000 Especially in some jobs, you know, a lot of people were forced into it.
02:07:41.000 It didn't work that good.
02:07:43.000 Yeah.
02:07:43.000 Yeah.
02:07:44.000 Did you get vaccinated?
02:07:46.000 No.
02:07:47.000 I got...
02:07:48.000 Which one did I get?
02:07:49.000 Not the Johnson& Johnson.
02:07:50.000 That seemed like the worst one.
02:07:53.000 Whereas like one vaccine, you're like, why is this one vaccine?
02:07:56.000 Yeah, and it's like 65% protection.
02:07:58.000 But it's all of it was shenanigans.
02:08:00.000 If you really study the actual paperwork on what the studies actually showed versus what they were saying it showed, it didn't stop transmission.
02:08:09.000 It didn't.
02:08:10.000 One person in the fucking vaccine group died of COVID. I guess my thing is, like, so does it work?
02:08:17.000 Like, because we have antibodies now?
02:08:19.000 Like, how does that work?
02:08:20.000 It works initially.
02:08:21.000 It works initially.
02:08:22.000 And, like, for a lot of vulnerable people, it probably was a good idea to get vaccinated.
02:08:27.000 Old people, fat people, people that had various diseases.
02:08:32.000 Yeah.
02:08:33.000 The problem is it didn't last for very long.
02:08:36.000 It didn't last for nearly as long as they wanted, and then you'd get your second shot, and that didn't last for years.
02:08:40.000 And now, unfortunately, what they're finding is, through this latest study with the Cleveland Clinic, they showed that with their healthcare workers, the more vaccines they got, the more they got COVID. Interesting.
02:08:53.000 Yeah.
02:08:54.000 Well, there's a lot of weird things that happen with your immune system.
02:08:56.000 I get very sick from the vaccines.
02:08:58.000 How bad?
02:09:01.000 I don't remember which one fucked me up the worst, but there was a time where I was home for two, three days where I was like, oh, I'm really sick.
02:09:06.000 I had fever.
02:09:07.000 I was really sick.
02:09:08.000 And then I got COVID and I was really sick from it.
02:09:11.000 But I feel like I wouldn't get any more.
02:09:14.000 I wouldn't get any more boosters.
02:09:15.000 I know people are like, I'm on five.
02:09:17.000 I'm like, trade.
02:09:18.000 That's good for you.
02:09:20.000 You know, some people it's fine.
02:09:22.000 Some people, I mean, it's like any other medication.
02:09:24.000 Some people, they take that medication, they don't have any problems with it.
02:09:28.000 And then other people take it and they get wrecked by it.
02:09:30.000 And that's the problem with making something mandatory, where some people are going to get wrecked by it.
02:09:36.000 Like really bad vaccine injuries.
02:09:38.000 Those are real.
02:09:39.000 We all know about them now.
02:09:40.000 We've all seen people dropped out of heart attacks that shouldn't be.
02:09:44.000 And then there's people that it might have saved their lives.
02:09:47.000 It's like that's an uncomfortable, like, sort of conversation that people that are against it have to have and people that are pro it have to have.
02:09:56.000 Like, you have to look at the actual data of what really did happen.
02:09:59.000 And particularly for, like, non-vulnerable people, like children, it was not a good idea.
02:10:05.000 Yeah, I guess I just didn't understand.
02:10:07.000 Like, say you didn't want to get vaccinated and somebody is vaccinated, then why does that matter?
02:10:11.000 Exactly.
02:10:11.000 Because it didn't...
02:10:12.000 I mean, also, there's a huge money to be made off the vaccines.
02:10:15.000 But there was also people wanted you to do what they did.
02:10:18.000 I did the right thing.
02:10:18.000 You should do the right thing.
02:10:19.000 You're selfish.
02:10:20.000 You're not doing it.
02:10:21.000 I mean, I guess I've heard that too.
02:10:23.000 It was like the one time in our lives we weren't allowed to be skeptical about pharmaceutical companies.
02:10:27.000 Right.
02:10:28.000 We're skeptical over everything else that they produce.
02:10:30.000 We should be.
02:10:32.000 Sure.
02:10:32.000 They have a long history of criminal fines.
02:10:35.000 Yes.
02:10:35.000 They've been fined fucking insane amounts of money for lying about drugs that wound up costing people their lives.
02:10:42.000 Was it doped up?
02:10:44.000 Dopesick?
02:10:45.000 Dopesick, yeah.
02:10:45.000 Yeah, I didn't say it, but I know the whole story about the Sackler family.
02:10:48.000 Yeah.
02:10:48.000 I mean, you look at something like that and you're like, yeah, we should be questioning everything.
02:10:51.000 They just paid their way out of it.
02:10:53.000 They paid their way out of it.
02:10:55.000 They gave like $6 billion.
02:10:57.000 No, they can't be prosecuted.
02:11:00.000 And they priced off so much money.
02:11:01.000 Oh, God.
02:11:02.000 That's crazy.
02:11:03.000 Billions and billions and billions of dollars.
02:11:03.000 Or you can lose six billion dollars and still be a billionaire.
02:11:06.000 Yeah.
02:11:06.000 Yeah.
02:11:07.000 Easy.
02:11:07.000 They did that with...
02:11:08.000 There was another medication that they did, Vioxx, that wound up giving people...
02:11:15.000 It gave a friend of mine a stroke, but it gave, like...
02:11:18.000 It killed 60,000, 50,000 people.
02:11:21.000 What is that for?
02:11:22.000 It was an anti-inflammatory medication.
02:11:24.000 It didn't even work well.
02:11:25.000 And they knew it in their internal emails.
02:11:29.000 They said, there's going to be problems, but we think we'll do very well with this.
02:11:33.000 So they knew that it was going to cause cardiovascular issues with people.
02:11:37.000 They knew it was going to cause blood issues with people and strokes and shit.
02:11:40.000 And they still released it.
02:11:42.000 And they got fined, but they got fined less than they made.
02:11:47.000 Yeah, so I think they made $12 billion and they got fined like $5 or something.
02:11:53.000 Right, you're like, I still have the surplus of billions of dollars.
02:11:56.000 Don't quote me on those numbers, but it's something to the point where you made money on this.
02:12:01.000 You still made money.
02:12:03.000 And it didn't work.
02:12:04.000 It wasn't a good...
02:12:05.000 There was other available things that worked better.
02:12:10.000 It's just a spooky thing that they can do that.
02:12:13.000 It's spooky and that people just go along with it.
02:12:16.000 Well, Johnson& Johnson has that lawsuit against their powder.
02:12:19.000 Yeah.
02:12:19.000 Because it has, I guess, talc and maybe some other stuff.
02:12:22.000 And women, I guess, are putting it in their private areas, getting cancer.
02:12:26.000 So they have a big lawsuit for that.
02:12:27.000 Yeah.
02:12:28.000 What is in it that's giving people cancer?
02:12:30.000 I don't know.
02:12:30.000 Is it just talc?
02:12:31.000 Because I know talc is not great for you.
02:12:34.000 It's like a mineral, right?
02:12:35.000 What is tau?
02:12:36.000 I guess.
02:12:36.000 I don't know.
02:12:37.000 But I just know, like, I used to use Johnson& Johnson powder all the time.
02:12:40.000 And I was like, oh, that's like something you would never even think of.
02:12:43.000 Yeah.
02:12:44.000 What caused people to get cancer from that?
02:12:50.000 The Johnson& Johnson vaccine was the one I was going to take.
02:12:52.000 That's the one Bridget got, I think.
02:12:55.000 The UFC had allocated like 150 vaccines for their employees, and we were doing shows during the pandemic.
02:13:01.000 They had this total bubble situation where you got tested.
02:13:05.000 Okay, what does it say?
02:13:06.000 When talcum powder is linked to cancer, it's important to distinguish between talc that contains asbestos and the talc that's asbestos-free.
02:13:13.000 Talc that has asbestos is generally accepted as being able to cause cancer if it's inhaled.
02:13:18.000 What about...
02:13:19.000 Just go to the lawsuit, Johnson& Johnson cancer lawsuit baby powder.
02:13:29.000 Because it was something with women, right?
02:13:33.000 Yeah.
02:13:35.000 Okay, what does it say?
02:13:42.000 So there's some sort of...
02:13:44.000 J&J lawsuit?
02:13:46.000 Settlement?
02:13:47.000 Okay.
02:13:48.000 Johnson& Johnson said on Tuesday that it had agreed to pay $8.9 billion to tens of thousands of people who claim the company's talcum powder products cause cancer, a proposal that lawyers for the plaintiffs called a significant victory in a legal fight that has lasted more than a decade.
02:14:05.000 Wow.
02:14:06.000 So are they still using the same talc, though?
02:14:08.000 That's a good question.
02:14:09.000 Maybe they're just telling people, don't put it on your hoo-ha.
02:14:12.000 But didn't it say just breathing it in is bad?
02:14:15.000 Yeah, the one with asbestos.
02:14:18.000 I'm trying to figure out why does this have asbestos.
02:14:20.000 The proposed settlement would be paid out over 25 years through a subsidiary which filed bankruptcy to enable the $8.9 billion trust Johnson& Johnson said in court filings.
02:14:29.000 If the bankruptcy court approves it, the agreement will resolve all current and future claims involving Johnson& Johnson products that contain talc such as baby powder, the company said.
02:14:39.000 So how is ovarian cancer?
02:14:41.000 Yeah.
02:14:42.000 Okay.
02:14:43.000 Significant victory for the tens of thousands of women suffering from gynecological cancers caused by the J&J's talc-based products.
02:14:50.000 But what is in it that's causing cancer?
02:14:53.000 And mesothelioma.
02:14:54.000 I've seen that on YouTube.
02:14:55.000 Ovarian cancer and mesothelioma.
02:14:57.000 You saw it on what?
02:14:58.000 TV commercials my whole life.
02:15:00.000 Yeah.
02:15:00.000 Right.
02:15:00.000 Do you suffer from mesothelioma?
02:15:01.000 Yeah.
02:15:02.000 Call your course number now.
02:15:04.000 I wonder if it goes right to Johnson& Johnson.
02:15:07.000 The one thing I was going to ask, I was reading about the appeal for the Sackler thing.
02:15:12.000 Five to six million they have to give up.
02:15:13.000 Billion.
02:15:14.000 Billion, I'm sorry.
02:15:15.000 750 million is paid out to the individuals.
02:15:18.000 Oh, God.
02:15:19.000 Where's the other five billion going?
02:15:21.000 Oh, God.
02:15:21.000 What the fuck is that?
02:15:22.000 Well, it's a fine.
02:15:23.000 It goes to the government.
02:15:24.000 Oh, okay.
02:15:25.000 That's good.
02:15:26.000 Listen, we have to deal with our homeless crisis.
02:15:29.000 No one's going to ever...
02:15:29.000 Trans kids don't have homes.
02:15:33.000 That's an issue right now?
02:15:35.000 Oh, I guess.
02:15:35.000 Yeah, maybe.
02:15:37.000 I'm sure.
02:15:38.000 They didn't say what caused the cancer.
02:15:39.000 They all opened up a sanctuary and taken all the dogs and all the trans kids.
02:15:42.000 For the talk, it says only $2 billion of that $8.9 goes to the plaintiffs.
02:15:46.000 So what is it that causes cancer, though?
02:15:48.000 Like, what's it in the talc that's causing cancer?
02:15:51.000 Is there a chemical?
02:15:52.000 I guess the asbestos is in it.
02:15:54.000 How is anybody selling anything with asbestos today?
02:15:56.000 Well, they probably took it out of paint and were like, let's get rid of it this way.
02:15:59.000 Oh, imagine if that's what they did.
02:16:01.000 No.
02:16:01.000 Who knows?
02:16:02.000 I mean, I think the government's pretty corrupt.
02:16:05.000 Well, there's definitely some corrupt people in the government, without a doubt.
02:16:09.000 And there's definitely a bunch of people that run these corporations and try to figure out how to make money with stuff they have laying around.
02:16:13.000 Sure.
02:16:14.000 There's a New York Times article.
02:16:15.000 I don't see a date, but this says that they know about it since for 129 years.
02:16:19.000 It says, Johnson Johnson feared baby powders possible asbestos link for years.
02:16:24.000 So there is asbestos in it?
02:16:27.000 What?
02:16:28.000 It says in 1971 they're recommended to upgrade the quality control.
02:16:32.000 Oh my god, look at this.
02:16:33.000 An executive at Johnson& Johnson said the main ingredient in its best-selling baby powder could potentially be contaminated by asbestos, the dangerous mineral that causes cancer.
02:16:41.000 He recommended to senior staff in 1971 that the company upgrade its quality control of talc.
02:16:47.000 Two years later, another executive raised a red flag saying the company should no longer assume that its talc mines were asbestos-free.
02:16:53.000 The powder, he said, sometimes contains materials that might be classified as asbestos fiber.
02:16:59.000 The carcinogen, which often appears underground near talc, has been a concern inside the company for decades.
02:17:05.000 In hundreds of pages of memos, executives worried about a potential government ban of talc, the safety of the product, and a public backlash over Johnson's Baby Powder, a brand built on a reputation for trustworthiness and health.
02:17:17.000 And it had asbestos in it.
02:17:20.000 That's what it is.
02:17:20.000 They took it out of the paint.
02:17:22.000 I don't think so.
02:17:23.000 I think they're saying it's in the same mines as the talc.
02:17:26.000 But they were like, let's just keep...
02:17:27.000 They just didn't clean it up.
02:17:27.000 Well, we'll just get it from the same mines.
02:17:29.000 They're cutting it just like the Mexican cartels cut the coke with fentanyl.
02:17:33.000 Yeah.
02:17:33.000 They're cutting it with talc.
02:17:34.000 Like, if you have, like, a bunch of asbestos and you've got a little talc that's worth 10 bucks a pound or whatever, just cut it in there.
02:17:42.000 Yeah, I would be surprised it's not in there.
02:17:44.000 Yeah.
02:17:45.000 Isn't fentanyl expensive?
02:17:46.000 Why are they mixing stuff with fentanyl?
02:17:47.000 It's very cheap, and it's also really potent.
02:17:52.000 So you need a very, very small amount of fentanyl.
02:17:54.000 Well, fuck you up.
02:17:57.000 But I'm sure it's not consistent.
02:17:59.000 They're not really good at quality control.
02:18:03.000 And also I think sometimes they leak fentanyl-laced cocaine specifically designed to kill people to target rival gangs.
02:18:10.000 They do it like if one gang is selling coke and they'll sabotage their supplies so that they kill their...
02:18:16.000 And people will stop buying it from them.
02:18:19.000 Yeah.
02:18:20.000 Or they use it to target certain people.
02:18:23.000 Interesting.
02:18:24.000 We learned a lot today, Adrienne.
02:18:26.000 I did learn a lot.
02:18:27.000 I did too.
02:18:27.000 I did too.
02:18:28.000 I learned about dinosaur piss.
02:18:30.000 Yeah, we're all drinking it.
02:18:31.000 Asbestos.
02:18:32.000 Mm-hmm.
02:18:33.000 Keep it out of your privates.
02:18:35.000 That episode of Fear Factor.
02:18:36.000 Mm-hmm.
02:18:37.000 With cum.
02:18:38.000 We learned a lot about your origins of comedy.
02:18:41.000 My origins of comedy.
02:18:42.000 Learned about your mom.
02:18:43.000 My mom, yes.
02:18:44.000 You love dogs.
02:18:45.000 Love dogs.
02:18:46.000 I should have brought Marshall.
02:18:47.000 Yes.
02:18:48.000 Next time.
02:18:48.000 Next time you do it.
02:18:49.000 We do it again?
02:18:49.000 We'll do it again.
02:18:50.000 Okay.
02:18:51.000 You gonna be at the club tonight?
02:18:53.000 I'm going to be at the club tonight.
02:18:54.000 Let's fucking go.
02:18:55.000 Thank you for having me.
02:18:55.000 It was fun.
02:18:56.000 You were hilarious.
02:18:57.000 Well, I mean, thank you for letting me film my special there.
02:19:01.000 My pleasure.
02:19:02.000 I'm excited.
02:19:02.000 When Louis texted me, I was so pumped.
02:19:04.000 Yeah, because we were talking.
02:19:05.000 He was like, where do you think you want to do it?
02:19:06.000 And he was like, I don't know.
02:19:08.000 I'm not sure.
02:19:09.000 And then he was like, what about Austin?
02:19:10.000 I was like, well, I love Austin.
02:19:11.000 He's like, well, what about Joe's Club?
02:19:13.000 I was like, yeah.
02:19:14.000 Yeah, it's a setup to film already, too.
02:19:15.000 Yeah, the audiences are great.
02:19:17.000 Both shows were so fun, because they were like, which room do you want to do?
02:19:20.000 I was like, I don't know.
02:19:21.000 I was like, I've got to see which one I like, but I like them both.
02:19:24.000 Yeah, they're both different, but really fun.
02:19:27.000 The whole setup is...
02:19:29.000 Louis actually helped me quite a bit.
02:19:31.000 He gave me some really good advice when we were in the middle of construction.
02:19:35.000 He told me to make the stage in the small room smaller.
02:19:38.000 It was larger.
02:19:39.000 They just designed the stage.
02:19:39.000 That makes sense, yeah.
02:19:40.000 Yeah, it was perfect.
02:19:41.000 What he designed was perfect.
02:19:42.000 He said just cut off four feet on each side.
02:19:45.000 And I was like, yeah, we don't need it that big.
02:19:47.000 It was really fun because you could kind of walk around.
02:19:52.000 Once we had gutted it, you're going, why don't we do this?
02:19:56.000 Why don't we do that?
02:19:57.000 And so Louis came in and I just said, what do you think?
02:20:01.000 And he was like, make this lower.
02:20:04.000 He's like a good director.
02:20:05.000 He knows how to do all that stuff.
02:20:07.000 I listened to everything he said.
02:20:08.000 I took every single piece of advice that he said.
02:20:12.000 Every recommendation I did.
02:20:13.000 Do you like one room over the other?
02:20:15.000 I love them both.
02:20:16.000 They're different.
02:20:17.000 The little room is really intimate.
02:20:18.000 The little room is like you're partying.
02:20:20.000 You're having a good time with people.
02:20:21.000 They're right there.
02:20:22.000 They're on top of you.
02:20:23.000 It's really fun.
02:20:24.000 It's also very honest.
02:20:26.000 If you feel performative or clunky, it feels gross in that room.
02:20:32.000 In the little room?
02:20:32.000 Yeah, in the little room.
02:20:33.000 I feel like the little room is freer.
02:20:35.000 Oh yeah, it is.
02:20:35.000 But I mean, if you do come off clunky, it's more obvious.
02:20:39.000 I can see that.
02:20:39.000 Because it's very intimate.
02:20:41.000 That's true.
02:20:41.000 It feels fake.
02:20:42.000 Yeah.
02:20:43.000 You know?
02:20:43.000 It's just a different room.
02:20:44.000 The other room is...
02:20:45.000 The other room is pretty intimate too.
02:20:47.000 The way I describe it is like they're both like hybrids of the Comedy Store original room and the Belly Room.
02:20:53.000 Yeah.
02:20:54.000 I've never performed there.
02:20:55.000 I've only visited.
02:20:56.000 Yeah.
02:20:56.000 I've only gone there to like visit.
02:20:58.000 I've never performed there.
02:20:59.000 Next time I go, I'll bring you.
02:21:00.000 All right.
02:21:00.000 Let's party.
02:21:01.000 Let's party.
02:21:02.000 Let's go.
02:21:02.000 What I do like about the big room is that it is into me because everyone does seem pretty close to you, even though it's like a pretty big room.
02:21:09.000 Yeah, it's well designed.
02:21:11.000 I mean, we put a lot of thought into it.
02:21:12.000 We raised the floor.
02:21:14.000 We had the stage set at the perfect height where it's like right at table height.
02:21:18.000 Not a bad seat in the room.
02:21:20.000 We like meticulously went over it for a long time.
02:21:23.000 Yeah.
02:21:24.000 I think too, what I think Ari was saying last night is like, when you go to some clubs, sometimes like the owner shows up and it's just like, it changes the vibe.
02:21:31.000 Yeah.
02:21:32.000 It's like, that's not here.
02:21:33.000 And I'm like, yeah, you're right.
02:21:34.000 It's not like you come around, people are like, oh, put that away or let's stop talking about whatever we're talking about.
02:21:39.000 Yeah.
02:21:39.000 That happens in other clubs for sure.
02:21:41.000 Right.
02:21:42.000 Yeah.
02:21:43.000 Well, I don't know.
02:21:44.000 There's only a few other clubs that are owned by comics.
02:21:47.000 Yeah, I guess I'm just thinking about clubs in maybe Manhattan, you know?
02:21:50.000 Right.
02:21:50.000 But that's the thing.
02:21:51.000 It's like you're dealing with...
02:21:53.000 There's like the owners.
02:21:54.000 The owners tell the managers what to do.
02:21:55.000 The managers tell the comedians what to do.
02:21:57.000 Right.
02:21:57.000 So they're still bosses.
02:21:58.000 Yeah.
02:21:59.000 Even though you are the boss, you're the owner.
02:22:01.000 It's not like that vibe.
02:22:02.000 No, the vibe is it's for all of us.
02:22:05.000 It's our place.
02:22:06.000 Yeah.
02:22:06.000 It's very welcoming.
02:22:07.000 Like, I don't know most of the comics.
02:22:09.000 Like, I'm getting to know them, but I felt very welcome there.
02:22:12.000 If you're funny, it's very welcome.
02:22:13.000 If you're not funny, it's very unwelcoming?
02:22:15.000 If you're not funny, they're fucking brutal.
02:22:18.000 Yeah.
02:22:18.000 Fair enough.
02:22:19.000 There's a lot of competition for stage time.
02:22:21.000 Sure.
02:22:21.000 There's a lot of comics.
02:22:22.000 There's a lot of young people.
02:22:23.000 Yeah, I could see that.
02:22:24.000 You know, all the staff are aspiring comedians, like this door staff, and they all auditioned with their actual comedy to get the jobs.
02:22:32.000 To be the door, like to work at the door?
02:22:33.000 Yeah.
02:22:33.000 That's actually pretty good.
02:22:35.000 Yeah, and they get stage time.
02:22:36.000 So they get to go up, and they go up to showcase nights.
02:22:40.000 There's open mic nights, two nights a week.
02:22:41.000 That's great.
02:22:42.000 Whereas I was interning for free.
02:22:44.000 Yes, you don't have to do that here.
02:22:46.000 I'm still not getting a spot.
02:22:47.000 But then even more importantly, the Creek in the Cave is right next door.
02:22:50.000 It's right up the street.
02:22:51.000 And then you've got Sunset Room, which is right next door.
02:22:54.000 Sunset, Brian Redband's room, is three doors down.
02:22:57.000 Oh, wow.
02:22:57.000 And the other day we did a show, like last Thursday, we did a show at my club and then guys were going back and forth and Redband's show was sold out too.
02:23:05.000 And then there's the Vulcan, which is also just a half a block down.
02:23:09.000 And, you know, they do comedy there, too.
02:23:11.000 And then you also have Cap City, which is in the domain.
02:23:14.000 And you have a bunch of little places, like the Velveeta Room.
02:23:17.000 Yeah.
02:23:18.000 There's a bunch of spots that are all around town, and all kinds of mics.
02:23:21.000 Do they do shows at Esther's Follies also, right?
02:23:23.000 Yes.
02:23:24.000 Yeah, they do shows.
02:23:24.000 There's a lot of good comedy here.
02:23:25.000 Yeah.
02:23:26.000 And the fans are great.
02:23:27.000 Well, they just love the fact that it's here.
02:23:29.000 Yeah.
02:23:29.000 It's like...
02:23:30.000 You know, out of the pandemic, this thing sprung.
02:23:34.000 Yeah.
02:23:34.000 And it really is like a weird thing that happened where we're all like, fuck this.
02:23:37.000 We've got to get the fuck out of L.A. Yeah.
02:23:39.000 And I was particularly motivated because my children were, at the time, 10 and 12. I was like, I don't think I want them growing up in L.A. Like, I already dodged that bullet with my oldest daughter.
02:23:48.000 A lot of people say that.
02:23:48.000 It's just creepy.
02:23:49.000 Yeah.
02:23:50.000 It's like there's so much chaos and freaks and just...
02:23:54.000 I'm like, I gotta get out of here.
02:23:55.000 And then, during the pandemic, we had this opportunity to move to Austin, and I was like, I want to do this.
02:24:00.000 And it was a crazy time to do it, because I was in the middle of this big Spotify deal, and the whole world was shut down, and I have everything running smoothly, and I'm like, fuck it, let's uproot.
02:24:10.000 We're gonna start from scratch.
02:24:11.000 And we came here, and I've never been happier.
02:24:14.000 That's great.
02:24:15.000 And then, when all the other comics started coming here, too, I was like, alright, I think this is gonna work.
02:24:20.000 There's a lot of comics here.
02:24:21.000 Yeah, it's pretty awesome.
02:24:23.000 That's so crazy that everyone's coming here.
02:24:25.000 Yeah.
02:24:25.000 It's like becoming a real hub for comedy.
02:24:27.000 That's so fun!
02:24:28.000 It is fun.
02:24:29.000 Well, that is one of the cool things you can do with money.
02:24:31.000 You know, if you have money and there's something you really love, like I love stand-up, you can actually do something like that.
02:24:36.000 You can actually make something happen and make it good for a lot of people.
02:24:41.000 It's not just good for me.
02:24:42.000 It's good for so many comics.
02:24:44.000 Yeah.
02:24:44.000 It's good for the audiences.
02:24:45.000 It's good for the people that work there.
02:24:46.000 It's fun.
02:24:47.000 I mean, it helps the economy.
02:24:49.000 Yeah.
02:24:49.000 Oh yeah, for sure.
02:24:50.000 Yeah, the whole area is packed now.
02:24:52.000 Yep.
02:24:53.000 It's awesome.
02:24:54.000 Alright, Adrian.
02:24:55.000 We'll see you tonight.
02:24:56.000 Yes.
02:24:56.000 I'm excited.
02:24:57.000 Thank you for having me.
02:24:57.000 I'm excited.
02:24:58.000 And you've got a tour coming up.
02:25:00.000 Yeah.
02:25:01.000 Come see me on tour.
02:25:02.000 What's your website?
02:25:05.000 AdrianAppalucci.com.
02:25:05.000 Spell that for these people.
02:25:08.000 A-D-R? There's an I in Appalucci.
02:25:11.000 Yeah.
02:25:12.000 Appalucci's I-A-P-A-L-U-C-C-I. Alright, go see her folks.
02:25:18.000 She's very funny.
02:25:18.000 I'm really happy to meet you.
02:25:21.000 Yeah, thank you for having me.
02:25:22.000 I'm pumped to do the shows tonight.
02:25:23.000 Yes.
02:25:24.000 Let's go.
02:25:24.000 Thank you.
02:25:25.000 Alright, bye everybody.
02:25:26.000 Bye.