Joe Rogan Experience #2110 - Fahim Anwar
Episode Stats
Length
3 hours and 9 minutes
Words per Minute
197.72354
Summary
In this episode of The Joe Rogan Experience, I chat with stand-up comic and friend of mine, Tony Hinchcliffe. We talk about his early days at The Mothership Comedy Club in Los Angeles, how he got into standup, and what it's like to be a standup comedian in the big city. We also talk about some of the things you should know about the Mothership, and some things you probably shouldn't know about it. I hope you enjoy this episode, and don't forget to subscribe on your favorite streaming platform so you never miss an episode. It's a must-listen if you haven't checked it out, and if you do, make sure to leave us a rating and review on Apple Podcasts, too! Cheers! -Joe Rogan Podcast by Day, by Night, All Day. -The Joe Rogans Experience, By Night, By Day - By Night. --Joe Rogans Podcast by Night - By Day, All-Day -By Night, All Day, by Night - By Evening, by Day & All-Night, By Night! -by Night, I miss you, Too Big, Too Small, I Love You, I'm Sorry, I'll See You Next Week! , by Night! -By Day, I Can't See You Soon! by Norma Vellian Podcast, I Miss You, My Brother, I Am I miss You, Thank You, Me, I Don't Get It? , I'll Be Back Soon, Soon, We'll Talk About It's Sober, I Will We'll Get Back To You'll Hear You Soon, By Bye Bye, Bye, Bye, Bye Bye! -- , Bye -- Bye! -- By Night -- by Night & I Love Ya'll, Bye! -- -- -Bye, My Best, See You, See Me Soon, See Ya, Love Ya, Bye Love, Bye Soon, Love, Love & Bye, Ollie -- Love, Cheers, Bye x -- Ode, Ode & I'll Hear Me & I'm With You, Blessings, -- Cheers -- Bye, XOXO, xOXO -- Or Not Really, - Ode -- Thank You? -- Novella | By Night All Day
Transcript
00:00:06.000
Train by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night, all day.
00:00:20.000
You forget that that's like a period of time and it's not going to be forever sometimes, you know?
00:00:27.000
You were one of the first people to take the trip out here.
00:00:34.000
Because I remember I had this writing job, right?
00:00:38.000
And life kind of sucked because you couldn't go out.
00:00:42.000
And then in between a lunch break, I'm on Instagram and I see Tony, you know, Tony Hinchcliffe's post.
00:00:48.000
This is like in the infancy of him coming out here, you know?
00:00:54.000
It seemed like this bizarro universe where life is still happening.
00:01:01.000
And I'm like, if this is happening out there...
00:01:09.000
I'm like, yo, because we're on Zoom, could I just write from Austin?
00:01:13.000
Just Zoom by day and then do stand-up out here with all you guys at night?
00:01:22.000
I would just be doing awesome shows at Vulcan and stuff at night.
00:01:38.000
Then Adam had me do what you normally do in the middle of the week.
00:01:43.000
So I got to do like six shows in that beautiful big room.
00:01:53.000
It's very much like—the small room is a combination of the belly and the OR. It's a little bit bigger than the belly room and a little more locked in than the belly room.
00:02:03.000
And then the big room is a combination of the OR and the main room.
00:02:07.000
That's what I tell everybody because they go, what's it like?
00:02:11.000
They're in the middle of all three of those rooms.
00:02:18.000
I think the store has started to get a facelift because of what you've done at Mothership.
00:02:24.000
Because so many comics would come back and be like, yo, they just give you all your sets.
00:02:32.000
Well, there's also the screens in the green room that show you what's going on on stage and the time.
00:02:37.000
Yeah, you can't miss your spot, and there's lights everywhere.
00:02:40.000
They'll let you know there's two sets of lights in the hallway, one in the beginning of the hallway, one at the top of the stairs.
00:02:50.000
And if you have any suggestions, by the way, just throw them out.
00:02:59.000
I think it was Tony's idea to have the lights in the green room.
00:03:03.000
It might have been Tony's idea also to have the monitors in the green room.
00:03:08.000
It was Louis' idea to change the size of the stage in the little room and lower the ceiling in the little room, too.
00:03:14.000
How big was the stage before Louis suggested the change?
00:03:23.000
He's like, why do you have all this extra stage?
00:03:28.000
You know, we just kind of like walked into this empty space when it was just a movie theater.
00:03:33.000
So when it was a movie theater, we had to change everything, right?
00:03:39.000
So in a movie theater, the stairs slant way down at a steep angle, right?
00:03:46.000
So we had to build a concrete, like a rebar and concrete floor.
00:03:55.000
So we raised it up, and then Louis wanted me to lower the ceiling even more, so I did that as well.
00:04:03.000
Luckily, we did have to recut the stage in the small room, but the concrete hadn't been poured yet.
00:04:10.000
So they just had to recut the steel and put it all.
00:04:14.000
I've never been a part of building anything like that before.
00:04:18.000
You could tell, though, because you're a stand-up of several years, you could tell it was designed by a comedian.
00:04:27.000
And also Richard, the architect, who is amazing.
00:04:36.000
And he also came up with the idea of making The Tunnel.
00:04:44.000
The whole thing's just such, it's all just set up just for a hang.
00:04:49.000
The most valuable asset to comedians, especially nowadays, is getting that footage, dude.
00:04:58.000
Yes, it's 8K, the sound's great, so I've been pushing for that at the store, and I think they're starting to.
00:05:05.000
They also have to put people's phones in bags, so they pay attention.
00:05:13.000
It's one of the things that I love about podcasts is that for three hours, I'm not going to see what's going on in the world.
00:05:22.000
I think it's a form of therapy in a weird way in this bizarre digitally sort of intertwined world.
00:05:33.000
It's so hard to get away from emails and text messages.
00:05:47.000
I have this OCD thing where I need to have a clean...
00:06:01.000
I'm always surprised, like, for how busy you are and, like, what a figure you are.
00:06:10.000
But I have friends and people who are much lower than you in the pantheon of things who take so much longer.
00:06:17.000
Well, sometimes I do take long, though, if I'm out doing something.
00:06:20.000
There's times where I'll come home and there's 60 text messages.
00:06:23.000
And there's not a chance in hell that I can just bang all those out.
00:06:32.000
It's not that I have too many people contacting me.
00:06:48.000
I love the text messages I have between friends, sending each other memes, talking shit.
00:06:56.000
When Ari sends me a funny thing or says something funny, it's a nice little relief.
00:07:04.000
I got a few of those text threads going on between me and comics, and it's the most fun thing, man.
00:07:10.000
But it's just, the fucking phone runs your goddamn life, dude.
00:07:15.000
And it's like, it's made it so, especially if you're a person who, like, if you're booking shows, you have to, you know, you'll be in contact with your agent, you have to be in contact with the opening acts, you gotta, you know, It's a tool for everything.
00:07:39.000
You know what the most hilarious thing to me is when you have to sign things online.
00:07:51.000
And you just agree that you're going to accept that as your signature.
00:08:03.000
If you have, like, a Samsung Galaxy S24 Ultra, their new phone, it has a stylus that's built into the phone, and you can use it to sign PDFs.
00:08:13.000
Does somebody care enough to be buying that phone just to sign documents?
00:08:27.000
A little bit, but it also allows you to take photographs.
00:08:31.000
So you could stand across the room and take a photo of yourself, or a video, and you press that button, and it starts recording.
00:08:45.000
I think there's some kid in Silver Lake who's like, yo, pose everybody at some cool bar and he has to flash.
00:08:51.000
Yo, I used to get fascinated by this one dude who would make old-timey wooden farm tools.
00:08:56.000
This guy would make old-timey, what are those things, planes?
00:09:01.000
He would make old-timey planes and old-timey...
00:09:06.000
No, no, planes, like where you're planing wood.
00:09:09.000
He was like a wood shop guy, but it was all handmade.
00:09:18.000
But when he makes the tools, is there a market to buy those, or is it novelty?
00:09:30.000
But this guy had a cool show and I used to watch it all the time.
00:09:38.000
It doesn't even have to be something that I love.
00:09:42.000
And that's when I really got into Bourdain's show.
00:09:47.000
Because I was like, God damn, this dude loves food.
00:10:03.000
He turned a whole truck into a camera, essentially.
00:10:10.000
It could be a miss sometimes because of how much work he's doing.
00:10:13.000
Imagine trying to convince these women it's a camera and not some creepy...
00:10:24.000
And the whole thing is like the darkroom, you know, everything.
00:10:35.000
Most of the photos we have is like a transfer to metal.
00:10:51.000
I know you're mad that your fucking homemade camera doesn't work, but you better pick that up, bitch.
00:11:03.000
Think about how many people visit, like, national parks.
00:11:08.000
No one's going in there cleaning up after you, you fucking animals.
00:11:14.000
My friend Adam Greentree, he goes on these big backpacking hunts where he'll go into the, like, Montana mountains, Colorado mountains, for like a month at a time.
00:11:23.000
And he's just picking up bags of people's shit that they left behind.
00:11:28.000
Bags of empty water bottles, bags of trash, and he just brings a bag with them and he collects it while he's out there hunting.
00:11:39.000
It's so disturbing, though, that people do that.
00:11:43.000
It's the worst aspect of us, this just total willingness through completely being selfish of just destroying one of the most amazing things we have in this country, which is national parks and public lands and a place where you could just walk out into the woods.
00:12:03.000
There's tons of places in this country where you can just go on a hike in the fucking woods with bears and moose and all kinds of shit.
00:12:14.000
Hopefully you know what you're doing, but nobody really tests you.
00:12:17.000
Nobody says, hey, Fahim, how long can you hike before you die?
00:12:30.000
Well, that's when you make the local news, and then there's a file photo of me, and the search has been on for six days.
00:12:41.000
I'm obviously just talking out of my ass, but I have been camping.
00:12:46.000
And one of the things that you realize when you go camping, if you just go camping just a few nights in a row, you'll realize what fucking bitches people are.
00:12:54.000
These animals, they sleep on the ground every night.
00:12:58.000
They're out there, wild, there's no doors, there's no borders, and they have all these defense mechanisms they developed.
00:13:05.000
To protect them from predators because of that.
00:13:11.000
If you're a fucking deer, every day is like listening for branches snapping.
00:13:18.000
Remember when I was snorkeling in Hawaii, and you get to see all that marine life down there?
00:13:27.000
He doesn't have to worry about rent or anything.
00:13:29.000
He doesn't have to make money to exist, which was an interesting concept.
00:13:36.000
But there's just something about that being enough for this turtle just kind of floating.
00:13:48.000
The turtle's a residual effect of evolution that's no longer necessary.
00:13:57.000
When you see a turtle, you're like, hey bro, this design is not gonna survive.
00:14:03.000
Doesn't Stallone still have his turtle from Rocky?
00:14:28.000
And they were not nearly as ruthless as these fucking turtles.
00:14:43.000
I bet they do, because tortoises live like a thousand years, don't they?
00:14:47.000
I think sea turtles live a long fucking time too, which is like the saddest thing when you see people kill them and eat them and you're like, oh.
00:14:59.000
Sometimes I think about like shark fin soup and you're like, how good must it be?
00:15:02.000
Aquatic turtles will commonly live 20 to 30 years in captivity, but many can live much longer.
00:15:09.000
Tortoises are some estimated to live 100 to 150 years.
00:15:28.000
Do you think there's a family that has a turtle that's been in the family for generations?
00:15:38.000
I think there's sharks that are alive today that are the oldest living creatures.
00:16:01.000
There's some fucking turtle that they think gets really old.
00:16:28.000
Do you think some of these turtles are not that progressive?
00:16:53.000
It's a type of snapping turtle, but there's like a gator snapping turtle.
00:16:57.000
I think maybe that's what they call it, alligator snapping turtle.
00:17:05.000
And you're like, bro, if you fuck up, that thing's taking your hand.
00:17:18.000
That's what I'm talking about, like that guy has.
00:17:22.000
If that maw gets a hold of one of those fingers, that shit is so gone.
00:17:37.000
If that was big and storming into a village in Mongolia a thousand years ago in some crazy movie, you'd be like, oh my god, you have some Lord of the Rings type movie?
00:17:50.000
And there would be guys with straps around that thing riding it.
00:17:56.000
Yeah, where the heroes are against the wall, but then the people riding these things come in from the side.
00:18:16.000
But isn't it interesting that as you make up for it, You have to give away your physical defenses.
00:18:32.000
A rat the size of a house cat could fuck you up.
00:18:38.000
This guy in New York, there's a possum just on the side of this building.
00:18:43.000
And then this white guy helps the neighborhood out.
00:18:49.000
And everyone's just thanking this guy and he just knows how to handle the possum and he walks it down the street and he just like throws it into an alley.
00:19:01.000
I just love how this is a sub-genre on the internet, grabbing possums.
00:19:05.000
That lady just grabbed that thing like she knew exactly what the fuck she was doing.
00:19:19.000
She's releasing possums like, oh, you got a little crazy.
00:19:28.000
They have a disease, a very specific disease, right?
00:19:38.000
I was worried because my dogs got them a couple of times.
00:19:46.000
Oh, so that's where the fucking term comes from.
00:19:51.000
They don't know if it's a response to escape coyotes because coyotes sometimes will kill you and not eat you immediately.
00:20:00.000
And maybe there's some sort of an evolutionary advantage to playing dead, and they leave you there, but you're not actually dead, and so they give up on trying to eat you yet?
00:20:10.000
She got a parasite, toxo, and then something called leptose.
00:20:32.000
A microscopic parasite found in a possum feces spreads a disease known as coccidiosis.
00:20:39.000
When opossums are immune to the disease, they're carriers and spread it to other animals.
00:20:48.000
Bloody diarrhea, dehydration, weight loss, general decline in health if untreated can result in complications or death.
00:20:57.000
You know what they give you when you have parasites?
00:21:06.000
Dogs are susceptible to leptospirosis, bacterial infection through contact with a possum, urine, or contaminated water.
00:21:21.000
If they bite them, they definitely can get toxo if they eat them.
00:21:24.000
So the moral of the story is just stay away from possums if you can, right?
00:21:30.000
Do you know that they think that somewhere in some places, like at France at one point in time, 50% of the population was positive for Toxo?
00:21:42.000
Feral cats leave cat shit around, and that's why they tell pregnant women never touch cat litter.
00:21:49.000
It's really bad for the kid if the woman's pregnant and she gets Toxo.
00:21:55.000
And the wildest thing about it is what it does to rats.
00:21:59.000
Because it rewires the rat sexual reward system, this parasite does, and gets the rat horny for cat piss.
00:22:09.000
The rat finds where the cat's pissing and he's literally erect.
00:22:17.000
Their fear of cats completely goes away to the point where they pursue cats.
00:22:21.000
So the cats eat the rats because toxo can only grow and can only reproduce inside the cat's digestive tract.
00:22:44.000
And it gets to people, and it makes people reckless.
00:22:47.000
It's a disproportionate amount of high instances of toxo are connected to successful soccer teams.
00:22:57.000
There's this guy, Robert Sapolsky, out of Stanford?
00:23:07.000
One of the things they found when he was a resident, or maybe it was one of his friends that was a resident, they found that there was a disproportionate amount of motorcycle victims who tested positive for toxo.
00:23:18.000
So they started testing motorcycle victims for toxo and they found that there was a disproportionate amount.
00:23:23.000
Enough to indicate that there's probably something going on there, that maybe the toxo makes people more reckless.
00:23:33.000
Think of how many people have feral cats, how many people probably have it.
00:23:36.000
You can have it and not even have any idea, have no inclination that you have it.
00:23:54.000
Let's just say it's only 16. Do you know how nuts that is?
00:24:15.000
I know there's like a loss of inhibition, I think, that comes with it.
00:24:32.000
You wouldn't recommend it, but two of the all-time greats had big head injuries.
00:24:47.000
I think he broke his bones and stuff when he was a kid.
00:24:51.000
I've been watching more car accidents because of Instagram than at any other time in my life.
00:25:03.000
X has porn on it, which is so wild that during the time where they were trying to take people, take their accounts away for COVID information that they didn't think was correct at the time...
00:25:23.000
Like, I'll be watching a cat video, and then there's just some guy, you know, getting hit by a car.
00:25:44.000
Like, should your feed be only people you follow?
00:25:49.000
Well, that's what these companies are struggling with.
00:25:51.000
Because when it was all just your circle, people weren't consuming as much as the suggested videos.
00:25:57.000
You know, what's funny is, like, I got shadow banned on Instagram for, like, around Thanksgiving.
00:26:03.000
And it sucks because I'm trying to do a special via non-traditional means, you know?
00:26:11.000
Like, this is a model now because of, like, you and YouTube.
00:26:15.000
Like, this is a viable alternative to, like, the Netflix, Comedy Central special, whatever.
00:26:19.000
So it's like you need the power of these social media companies to reach people.
00:26:23.000
So, like, doing podcasts and you do the YouTube special, that's, like, an arm of it.
00:26:30.000
Ari Shafir has, like, been very helpful with, like, trying to self-release a special.
00:26:36.000
Like, this is what I did in my last one, you know?
00:26:39.000
Because most people are going to access you via clips.
00:26:45.000
Because the hour-long special is kind of for jazz heads.
00:26:48.000
You got to be a real stand-up comedy nerd to, like, sit down and watch an hour.
00:26:55.000
Because, like, I was talking to Roy Wood Jr. And, like, sometimes because we're in stand-up, we just think it's the world because it is our world.
00:27:06.000
And he kind of, he, like, bird's eye viewed it for me.
00:27:10.000
He's like, yo, when you go on Spotify, stand-up is under jazz.
00:27:21.000
And I'm like, it kind of put everything into focus for me where, you know, I don't have to be as invested.
00:27:27.000
I'm like, okay, there's a ceiling to what you can do.
00:27:32.000
Like, I need the arm of the clips because I had some clips do like 12 mil and stuff and people were able to find me via Instagram Reels.
00:27:42.000
So when they shadow ban me, it tells you, you can look at your account status and there'll be marks on there.
00:27:49.000
It'll say, there's like three strikes and stuff.
00:27:52.000
And then one of the things it said is, your content will not be shown to non-followers.
00:27:59.000
Your stuff gets suggested to people who may not have known about you.
00:28:04.000
So you need that as an artist if you want to grow, to see your special and your stand-up.
00:28:09.000
So you're being suppressed, you're being limited.
00:28:13.000
Because it tells you on your account status, and then I had people talking to people who work at IG or Meta or whatever, and they're like, yeah, it's shadow banned.
00:28:23.000
I think it's because it's an election cycle or something.
00:28:29.000
I think it just scrapes for buzzwords and just blanket has these suppression on it.
00:28:38.000
Well, it sucks because there's no nuance to it.
00:28:44.000
I do it on YouTube sometimes where I'm just working on material.
00:28:48.000
And sometimes there's a great joke that works and I just post it on a reel because it's like 80% of the way there and I'm just feeding the algo.
00:28:59.000
I do a clip and then I post it on all the social media platforms.
00:29:02.000
So it remained on TikTok and all the other ones.
00:29:12.000
Just out of nowhere, I'm like, I just want to let you guys know Hamas is hiding at my ex-girlfriend's house.
00:29:21.000
It's like saying something without saying something.
00:29:27.000
Oh my god, we can't have jokes about Hamas signing?
00:29:32.000
And then I think it just saw Hamas on the thumbnail, you know, when you post on the grid.
00:29:39.000
And then there was no way to reach people, and I'm just fucked.
00:29:46.000
I think it's just machine learning or whatever it is.
00:29:53.000
And there's no nuance applied to the situation or the joke.
00:29:58.000
So it just sees Hamas, and then my account got hit like that.
00:30:02.000
So is it any joke about Hamas or just mentioning Hamas?
00:30:09.000
I think they just saw Hamas on a thumbnail or Hamas on a caption, not knowing that it's a guy on stage doing a joke.
00:30:29.000
And sometimes when they're pretty high up on IG, they have a contact or something more than a nebulous relationship.
00:30:35.000
Because you can't, these companies are so, there's no point person.
00:30:42.000
They had a guy and we're going back and forth and nothing was getting done.
00:30:45.000
And luckily I'm at a large agency, like a talent agency, and they were going at it too, trying to help.
00:30:56.000
And then so the joke is up, whereas before it wasn't.
00:31:00.000
It's like I had someone vouch for me and then they like hands were off.
00:31:05.000
But only because I had the might of this talent agency.
00:31:08.000
If I was like a regular guy, I would just be fucked.
00:31:10.000
Well, that is the thing about an agency can get in contact with someone who there's a value in that for sure.
00:31:17.000
But you also have to realize from their perspective, they're managing at scale literally billions of people.
00:31:24.000
I mean, Facebook and Instagram are all the same company, right?
00:31:34.000
Well, isn't it like a small nation when you add up how many Facebook users...
00:31:50.000
Daily active users on Meta products is 3.19 billion.
00:32:02.000
You have to think from their perspective that they think they have an obligation somehow to maintain a certain level of discourse on their platform.
00:32:19.000
But then when you get people in there that are very politically biased and you get people in there that are socially biased and they only want one perspective being heard and then you get a lot of people self-censoring because they self-censor because they're like, hey, I don't know what I can say and what I can't say.
00:32:41.000
I don't like calling it X. I can still call it Twitter.
00:32:46.000
Because it's not an X. You can't make an X. You make a tweet.
00:32:55.000
I'm like, I was on X and I was just drafting a bunch of X's.
00:33:11.000
The Twitter thing is – I mean some of it is disturbing when people get comfortable enough to just like really speak their mind about things.
00:33:19.000
Well, that's the thing about social media too is – Sometimes when you're a close-knit circle, your buddies kind of check you like, hey, what are you doing?
00:33:27.000
But social media, some people have a lot of rope.
00:33:37.000
Like, you could tell your buddy has been on the road for too long.
00:33:39.000
Like, they do a video in a hotel room or something.
00:33:42.000
And you're like, oh no, they're losing their mind.
00:33:46.000
Just when you're not surrounded by community and people and you're just a brain floating on the road.
00:33:52.000
The number one key that I found very early is go on the road with your friends.
00:33:57.000
I've entered a phase in my career where now I'm starting to be able to do that, whereas before you're not making enough money.
00:34:03.000
So you're just beholden to whoever they book as a feature, and you're just stuck in a hotel.
00:34:09.000
You're walking across a freeway to go to a Cracker Barrel and kill time.
00:34:39.000
So it's a bunch of guys who are really good friends, who love each other, been on the road forever, going to dinners forever.
00:34:46.000
I've had hundreds of dinners with Ari and Joey Diaz.
00:34:54.000
It's just being with your favorite people, having a good time, doing the thing that you can't believe you get paid to do.
00:35:08.000
I know, but I mean, this is a platform, because I wasn't a Netflix guy.
00:35:16.000
That just shows me that Comedy Central and Netflix don't.
00:35:19.000
Well, look at how many of my friends and peers are just skyrocketing, and they weren't the guys they picked, you know what I mean?
00:35:25.000
So it's kind of validating and refreshing, and it's cool to see comedy policing itself and just promoting comedy.
00:35:32.000
Guys who are in the trenches and know what's up, not some guy who has a communications degree.
00:35:36.000
I think there's a lot of comedy nerds now, too, that are really into comedy.
00:35:41.000
They get to see how the sausage is made from all the podcasts.
00:35:46.000
Before that, I always said this, there's so few conversations with great stand-ups That exists like from the George Carlin days or Richard Pryor days.
00:35:58.000
There's not hours and hours of Pryor just sitting around talking about things, which would have been amazing.
00:36:06.000
Can you imagine if Richard Pryor or George Carlin had a podcast?
00:36:13.000
And George has done some conversations where he talked about his writing process.
00:36:17.000
He talked about, you know, the art form itself.
00:36:20.000
But he had a very specific way of doing it that most people don't do it that way.
00:36:25.000
And then he would just sort of punch it up a little bit.
00:36:27.000
That monologue would be his monologue for the year.
00:36:29.000
It was amazing, but it was rigid and he knew his beats and stuff.
00:36:35.000
Because in the end, he became this guy who was...
00:36:43.000
It was like both things were this, it was still a great comic, clearly.
00:36:50.000
And he had, because he didn't have a podcast, his view of the world came out in a stand-up.
00:36:58.000
And he had to figure out a way to make that funny.
00:37:01.000
Well, it gets so distilled when that's here, because we can talk at length and approximate it.
00:37:07.000
And you can go back on what you said and go, you know, actually, now that I'm thinking about it, I can see how you would look at it the other way, too, which is so goddamn important.
00:37:20.000
I think comedy's always been popular, but not like this.
00:37:23.000
And I almost feel like people are discovering stand-up this day and age sort of like the way they used to discover music.
00:37:31.000
People are taking ownership of discovering comedians.
00:37:34.000
Because even me, I'm kind of like under the radar.
00:37:38.000
And when a comedy fan likes me, there's just like a level of...
00:37:43.000
It's like they found a cool record at a record shop.
00:37:46.000
Because of the advent of YouTube and Instagram, people aren't just accepting whatever is being fed to them through a corporate pipe.
00:37:57.000
Like, if you weren't picked before, you couldn't do anything.
00:38:01.000
That was the only way to even get in front of people, is like, you had to be the corporate pick.
00:38:09.000
But now there's all these ways to circumvent the traditional...
00:38:12.000
Like, Schultz was saying something, it was like...
00:38:15.000
Younger generations and stuff, they don't know where they saw it or what the medium is or the branding.
00:38:21.000
They just know they saw it on a TV, whether it's YouTube, whether it's Netflix, whether it's Amazon.
00:38:26.000
That type of branding is almost like legacy thinking from when I was coming up and you were coming up and there was a way to do it.
00:38:36.000
Well, they like what they like, too, and there's plenty of variety.
00:38:39.000
There's all sorts of different comics out there now that are really popular.
00:38:44.000
I think for stand-up, for the art form, I don't think there's ever been a better time.
00:38:54.000
And that's one of the more interesting things about watching the club.
00:38:57.000
Because occasionally I get to see these people that audition to be door people.
00:39:11.000
You know, because there's all these different levels.
00:39:13.000
There's guys like Hassan and Derek who are now going on the road.
00:39:21.000
And then there's like the headliners that come in that are there all the time, like Shane and Duncan and Tom Segura and all these people that come in to fuck around, but there's this feeling that starts at the bottom.
00:39:34.000
It starts with the people that are inspired about making it still.
00:39:38.000
And then there's the people that are just getting in, and then there's the people that are in, and then there's the people that are on television, and everybody knows who they are, and they scream when they go on stage.
00:39:49.000
So it's like you get to see how we're all just the same thing.
00:39:53.000
We're all just artists, for lack of a pretentious word.
00:39:59.000
We're doing a weird art form that hasn't really, until now, been documented as to how to go about doing the process and how each one of us went about doing the process.
00:40:10.000
Just like, I'm interested in that motherfucker that makes wood.
00:40:24.000
Well, it's so interesting how the blueprint as to make it whatever you want to call it in comedy has shifted so fast in the past couple years.
00:40:33.000
Because when I was coming up, it was SNL. It was doing like a late night set.
00:40:39.000
It was doing premium blend, like these smaller showcase type sets.
00:40:51.000
These were like people's entry points to these people.
00:41:06.000
And we were just sitting eating ice cream on the bench.
00:41:09.000
And I'm, you know, talking to the young comics, and I'm like, what do you guys pine for now?
00:41:15.000
Because when I was coming up, I knew what the thing was.
00:41:24.000
The biggest set of your life is in French Canada.
00:41:28.000
And then you make an Arby's joke and you're like, oh, you don't have Arby's?
00:41:31.000
That would have been good to know in front of all these suits.
00:41:40.000
That was weird to me that they had no touchdown.
00:41:43.000
He goes, maybe like a clip goes viral or a podcast.
00:41:58.000
The blueprint involved getting a sitcom, getting a talk show, getting a something.
00:42:09.000
That was the thing that always bummed me out the most about Richard Jennings.
00:42:12.000
Richard Jennings, when he died, was one of the best comics ever, but felt like a failure because he didn't become Jim Carrey.
00:42:22.000
Because he didn't become the guy who did the movies.
00:42:24.000
He had a TV show, it was called Platypus Man, that was on one of those burgeoning networks, one of those new networks.
00:42:34.000
It was one of those weird networks where they started offering people deals to do shows that maybe wouldn't have got a show at NBC or ABC. But he was a great comic, man.
00:42:45.000
And he never liked the fact that He was just a comic.
00:42:51.000
But what's crazy is if you plug him in today...
00:43:04.000
It's something that everybody loves, but nobody takes that seriously because it seems like the person on stage is doing what you can do.
00:43:14.000
But they get up there and they learn very quickly.
00:43:17.000
Well, you ever have a drunk person who's like, I'll do it sometimes.
00:43:28.000
And then there's people that want to do it and just don't know how to do it.
00:43:33.000
I'll get that after shows, some young comics, like, what do I do?
00:43:38.000
Yeah, you just gotta do that first open mic night.
00:43:47.000
Yeah, but the fact, if you even do it, do three minutes, and even if it's terrible, that is 99% further than most people ever do.
00:44:03.000
If you have gotten laughs and then you bomb, I think that's better.
00:44:12.000
But if you start off bombing, the road to actually getting laughs...
00:44:15.000
Like, if you bomb out of the gate, first time on stage, just death.
00:44:21.000
Well, if you come back after that happens, then...
00:44:28.000
But those are both great assets as a stand-up comedian.
00:44:32.000
The crazy person isn't always, you know, the crazy person isn't always, that's not really...
00:44:42.000
You know, it's a thousand horsepower engine on a fucking kid's bike.
00:44:46.000
They have, like, a little kid's bike with a fucking giant...
00:44:52.000
Oh, I also got to thank you because, I mean, it reminds me...
00:45:00.000
I remember I was doing, I forget which one, I've been on a few times, but like, you're like, have your parents seen you before?
00:45:09.000
They saw me do the Apollo when I was 18. And then I got booed at the Apollo.
00:45:14.000
And that was the first, I was like a few months in doing stand-up.
00:45:18.000
And they're from Afghanistan, and this is not a thing you do.
00:45:21.000
And they wanted me to quit, and it was just very disgraceful, me doing this.
00:45:29.000
I'm telling the story on the, I think, one or two of them.
00:45:37.000
And then you're like, they gotta come see you again, man.
00:45:40.000
And I go, I just have this mental block because that was so bad that it's like an emotional thing you just put in a closet and you just ignore it.
00:45:54.000
Doing comedy on my own and keeping my parents and stuff like separate.
00:46:00.000
And then on the podcast, I was like, I just always had this fantasy of like, when they see me, it being so good to counteract how bad that experience was, that it would be like a celebration that everything is okay, your son turned out okay,
00:46:16.000
all the worries you had, you don't have to worry anymore.
00:46:21.000
So I think after I spoke it into existence on your pod, I actually went about doing it.
00:46:27.000
So I hit up the Booker of The Tonight Show and I'm like...
00:46:36.000
I told them the whole story of my parents have never seen me since that thing.
00:46:39.000
This is an emotional thing I need to take care of.
00:46:45.000
It's been this monkey on my back for 20 years, 21 years, you know?
00:47:05.000
And it was just very therapeutic to be able to give this to my parents because they know what The Tonight Show is.
00:47:16.000
Thank you for letting me do it and all that stuff.
00:47:18.000
But in the grand scheme of entertainment and needle moving...
00:47:24.000
You used to do Tonight Show when people are like honking and shouting your name from cars and shit.
00:47:32.000
But this was just to give my parents a night out and a memory and a story from the parents.
00:47:44.000
Because I'm like friends with The Roots somehow.
00:47:48.000
They're like, oh, your son is amazing, blah, blah, blah.
00:47:53.000
So it was everything I could ever dream of it being.
00:48:03.000
But still, just when you talk about things and you speak something into existence, I think that's valuable, you know?
00:48:16.000
You've got to be real careful with that speak things into existence talk.
00:48:20.000
Because you're a very dedicated and disciplined writer.
00:48:27.000
You put a lot of time and effort into stand-up comedy.
00:48:32.000
But I mean, I just develop systems where it doesn't feel because when people are like, oh, you write a lot.
00:48:36.000
It doesn't feel like I write a lot because I just have systems and processes where over time I look at my notes and I just have a bunch of stuff.
00:48:46.000
I think people have such an aversion to writing.
00:48:51.000
And there's a typewriter, and then you do a pipe, and you're like, what's funny?
00:48:57.000
Whereas I've gotten my process to a point where I just live life, and if something happens, I jot it in my phone.
00:49:03.000
And you jot enough things in your phone, that list is pretty long.
00:49:07.000
And then I developed that Fahim works on stuff in his friends' drop-by show.
00:49:14.000
The jam in the van was the only venue doing shows.
00:49:23.000
I go, I just have all these bits that I never get around to trying.
00:49:32.000
And this goes back to people, comedy fans being savvy now, where they know the process.
00:49:36.000
And I have enough fans at this point now where they want to see how the sausage gets made.
00:49:42.000
So I do like 10 minutes in between acts, just trying stuff out.
00:49:46.000
And then I bring up people doing great sets, you know what I mean?
00:49:48.000
So the bulk of the integrity of the show isn't based on me trying new stuff because I have great comics interspersed.
00:49:56.000
So it's a very low stakes way for me to try a bunch of new material.
00:49:59.000
So after the great act goes, I do 10 more minutes of bullshit or whatever, bring up the next comic.
00:50:05.000
So it's a safe space for me to be able to try new stuff.
00:50:09.000
Yeah, the show is called, Fahim works on stuff, and his friends drop by.
00:50:17.000
I think a lot of times comics, when they're like, oh man, I'm so afraid, I can't write stuff, it's like, make the show where you can.
00:50:26.000
First of all, it was very cool to see Bobby on the pod.
00:50:31.000
I told Bobby, I'm like, I'm so glad that you finally did it.
00:51:02.000
Like a headliner to actually take me on the road with him.
00:51:15.000
I had him on my pod one time, and I had an idea of where I wanted the pod to go, and I'm just kind of mentally trying to corral Bobby, and there's no way you can't.
00:51:29.000
I need a possum guy just to grab Bobby off the wall.
00:51:35.000
I spent 20 minutes today watching dudes do flips over bowls.
00:51:43.000
Because there's dudes, this is a new sport, where the bulls run at them and they flip over the bulls.
00:52:19.000
I guarantee you Father Time catches them just like it catches great fighters.
00:52:24.000
I bet there's a few of those guys that hang in there a little too long.
00:52:31.000
Maybe you got that one bad ankle, but I'll compensate with my right ankle.
00:52:38.000
This time you're going headbutting a fucking bull.
00:52:45.000
Listen, I prefer it to the other thing, the other bullfighting thing they do, where they stick them full of spears and they compromise it.
00:53:15.000
You know, during the summertime, you just have so much free time that I had my best friend across the street.
00:53:26.000
And I would try to just do it on the side yard of my parents' house.
00:53:38.000
So I would just run, do a round off to backflip.
00:53:43.000
I think when you first start, you want to see the ground the whole time because you're too afraid to totally let go.
00:54:02.000
And then that's actually easier because you just push off the wall.
00:54:07.000
And then I learned how to have my buddy launch me.
00:54:12.000
I actually posted on my Instagram, because when I was shadow banned, I was just posting dancing.
00:54:26.000
But at the time, when you were shadow banned, would that mean I would have a hard time seeing your stuff?
00:54:32.000
New people wouldn't be able to see me, but I would be able to reach some of...
00:54:38.000
Maybe not the entire pie, but if my ceiling was going to be people who already follow me, I wasn't going to reach any new people.
00:54:49.000
Because I had all these jokes and stuff, and I go, I don't want to burn these clips on a suppressed audience.
00:54:55.000
So I just went to my archives and just reposted dance shit.
00:54:59.000
But what's funny is, like, sometimes when you post dance stuff, it brings people who like dance that you wouldn't think...
00:55:06.000
Like, sometimes you'll like a dance thing, and it throws me for a loop, because I wouldn't think Joe Rogan likes a dancing video from me.
00:55:16.000
And then Juliette Lewis started liking some of this stuff.
00:55:20.000
And then she asked a question in one of the IGs.
00:55:24.000
And I'm like, she's like, oh yeah, did you used to do this for talent shows and stuff?
00:55:27.000
And I'm like, oh, I did it for the High School Musical.
00:55:51.000
Because women have always been impressed by singing and dancing.
00:55:59.000
But think about all the jealous guys and they just call Travolta gay or whatever.
00:56:05.000
Because if the girls like something that kind of blends feminine, haters are just going to say he's gay.
00:56:20.000
If women like it and if it's difficult to do, what makes those two things that are difficult to do that women like?
00:56:32.000
If it was rock, like if it's leather, guys can get behind that.
00:56:36.000
Right, but if a guy can really dance, that shit's impressive.
00:56:54.000
Fahim does a character on stage called Lance Canstopolis, and it was always a favorite of the comedy stories.
00:57:13.000
It's like that movie, what was it, The Dark Half?
00:57:18.000
Where the writer, like, he's got, like, an evil writer in his brain that writes all the hits.
00:57:27.000
The thing is, I almost feel like Lance is who I would be if I didn't have parents.
00:57:37.000
And even when I have thoughts and stuff, there are so many gates before I kind of say, you know, what I say.
00:57:57.000
Because when I write jokes and shit, I'm like, it's intricate, you know?
00:58:10.000
And I'm going on to the comedy store where they've seen so much high-level, cerebral, great jokes and stuff.
00:58:18.000
And then they're like, Lance, can't stop all this.
00:58:50.000
It's like I get mad if Duncan doesn't bring Little Hobo.
00:58:54.000
So one time, when Adam was still at the store, he was, you know, the manager there, I went up earlier in the night in the OR as me, and then my set's done, and Whitney's running late, and then Adam tracks me in the hallway, he, like, grabs me by the shoulders,
00:59:10.000
and he goes, Whitney's running late, get Lance!
00:59:19.000
So I go to the trunk of my car, and then I turn to Lance.
00:59:25.000
So this is like three or four comics later, and they go, who's next?
00:59:33.000
Then I go back up for the same audience, but I'm as Lance this time, and I dance and shit, and then I sit on the stool, and I'm like, you guys look strangely familiar.
00:59:42.000
LAUGHTER I do a 10-minute Lance set, and then I see Whitney in the back, and then I'm like, ladies and gentlemen, Whitney coming.
00:59:58.000
I guess one other time I did do Lance on the same show, like as Fahim.
01:00:12.000
I know he was like a great impressionist and great actor.
01:00:15.000
He used to go on stage and he used to do all these characters.
01:00:21.000
And then he would do this character called the Dice Man.
01:00:49.000
Just singing Elvis in front of Madison Square Garden.
01:01:46.000
What is dudes who like to party and go to clubs?
01:02:02.000
I typed in cheesy guy cologne and this bottle popped up.
01:02:27.000
Oh, Tommy was big for me growing up, and then Polo Sport was a hot fragrance.
01:02:40.000
It's functional, though, too, because if I don't do that and I shave with a razor, you'll get ingrown.
01:03:04.000
Also, because this is my third traditional special.
01:03:10.000
You get bored, and there's enough digital IP out there of me doing straight stand-up.
01:03:20.000
You could just do an entire Lance tour if you wanted to.
01:03:26.000
I also had this idea, too, because Lance just loves everything.
01:03:39.000
It's like a documentary of Lance putting out an album and an EP. And so...
01:03:45.000
So he, like, tours America doing, like, shitty venues, but he has, like, three songs on an album.
01:03:51.000
And then the in-between of doing songs, he's just, like, doing crowd work, like, thank you for supporting live music and everything.
01:03:57.000
And, like, how I came up with this song, I was taking a shit at Chipotle, and, like, just the chords came to me, hit it, you know?
01:04:07.000
That could be a fun, different type of special to do.
01:04:10.000
Yeah, I just love when someone busts out a character, you know?
01:04:14.000
There's a few things you don't see that much in stand-up anymore.
01:04:22.000
When you're a young comic, if you do something kind of non-traditional, you can get shit on.
01:04:28.000
So, like, luckily Lance happened after I was really established at the comedy store.
01:04:36.000
But even if you weren't established, if you came in and just did Lance, people would think, oh my god, this is hilarious.
01:04:40.000
But Lance was able to thrive because I already had the, for real.
01:04:48.000
Lance was able to thrive because I was already beloved at the store.
01:04:54.000
Because if you start killing with a character and no one knows who you are, you're going to get shit on by the elders and stuff.
01:05:05.000
It's a harder sell than if you have no history as a traditional comic.
01:05:14.000
Thad Beaumont, a parasitic twin removed from inside his skull when he was 12. What?
01:05:20.000
Since then he's become a critically acclaimed literary writer and a blockbuster crime writer under the pseudonym George Stark who goes on a murderous rampage when Thad kills him off.
01:05:35.000
I mean, it's fun doing different character music stuff.
01:05:45.000
This is going to be sort of the way that Tonight Show thing was spoken into existence.
01:05:52.000
I did a promo, like a music video for my special.
01:05:58.000
I think comics are open to anybody trying anything, as long as it's really good.
01:06:05.000
But the problem, we don't put that same scrutiny on someone trying to stand up for the first time.
01:06:10.000
You know, like when you see someone doing an open mic night, you expect them to suck.
01:06:15.000
But if you see someone doing an open mic night and sucking as a character, you're like, you ain't never gonna make it, bitch.
01:06:24.000
I have a special promo for a new comedy special.
01:06:32.000
Instead of doing a trailer for my special, I'm like, let me just do a music video.
01:06:53.000
Your third career is your super emo, satirical, British emo songs.
01:07:02.000
I was listening to Tears for Fears and I'm like, this has to be my promo.
01:07:06.000
Bro, if you go, like, way over the top, Tears for Fears, like, over to the next level of dismay.
01:07:14.000
Like, so over the top, you could be, that's your next career.
01:07:21.000
You're gonna be a mock emo singer from the UK. Somewhere where it never is sunny.
01:08:06.000
If you had, like, this thing in the back of your head and you're like, you know what?
01:09:01.000
One of the fun things about the club is no one knows who's gonna be on stage.
01:09:04.000
I see it, because I follow the Instagram account, obviously.
01:09:07.000
It's fun, depending upon who's in town, especially when we do Protect Our Parks.
01:09:13.000
It's fun seeing that pop, because the audience is losing their fucking minds.
01:09:25.000
You really were, because you were one of the first comics that took a chance to move down here.
01:09:29.000
I mean, it's very cool to see the scene grow and continue to grow.
01:09:33.000
And part of you thinks, like, how big can it get?
01:09:37.000
It can get pretty big because there's a lot of new people that are doing it.
01:09:41.000
Well, and if you're a young comic, this seems way more viable than a place like New York or L.A. that's super saturated.
01:09:49.000
And even if you're funny, it's hard to get on stage.
01:09:58.000
And I always say that this is, my girl wants to party all the time.
01:10:24.000
If I do it too good, it'll pick up on the algorithm.
01:10:27.000
Is there a way we can just say, put the full things on Spotify and just cut out the music chunks and tell people we're doing it?
01:10:50.000
They should be able to talk about one of the greatest fucking things.
01:10:55.000
How many entertainers have ever done as many things as Eddie Murphy has?
01:11:05.000
Beverly Hills Cop comes out, I think, this week.
01:11:09.000
Dude, if he wanted to do stand-up right now, if he just wanted to jump back on stage right now, he would start murdering.
01:11:16.000
Even watching his comedians in cars, just being, talking to Jerry.
01:11:21.000
There's so many great bits in conversation with him.
01:11:23.000
Great tragedy that that guy doesn't do stand-up.
01:11:28.000
Did you watch SNL? I watched Shane's monologue.
01:11:39.000
It's rare that someone is really good at stand-up and is great at sketch like that, too.
01:11:44.000
He said they were, for the most part, they were cool to him.
01:11:52.000
It's one of the few times that it's been appointment viewing for SNL, you know?
01:12:03.000
My favorite from their, when he was on, is that Limu Emu sketch.
01:12:08.000
And I'm watching on the internet, I go, they didn't air this?
01:12:17.000
There's a certain order, and maybe it got cut for time or something.
01:12:21.000
But when I'm watching it, I'm like, this is the best.
01:12:23.000
Imagine putting together a new show every week and it not sucking.
01:12:43.000
If you watch some of those episodes now, you could never do any of what they were doing.
01:12:54.000
The old Saturday Night Live's were fucking great.
01:12:58.000
Well, that was the only place to see something like that, too.
01:13:11.000
I remember I was at a pool hall the first time I saw it.
01:13:14.000
I think it was one of those Super Bowl days where they had In Living Color on during halftime.
01:13:21.000
Because everybody was watching In Living Color.
01:13:24.000
I was watching Jim Carrey's Fire Marshal Bill with his face all burned off.
01:13:31.000
There was nothing like that that had ever been on television before.
01:13:38.000
They had The Simpsons, they had like a little wilder stuff.
01:13:45.000
I saw that, I was like, are you out of your fucking mind?
01:13:51.000
On TV? That he auditioned for SNL. The show was nuts, man.
01:14:06.000
Are you saying they couldn't do Handyman today?
01:14:17.000
Oh, I got to work with David Allen Greer when I did like a small guest star on Gerard's show when it was on NBC, that Carmichael show.
01:14:24.000
And I was just so starstruck because I grew up watching.
01:14:29.000
Even before Living Color, he was just this tremendous actor.
01:14:46.000
Dave Chappelle talked about this, but it is a real thing.
01:14:50.000
Why do they, in so many scripts, want masculine black men to dress like women?
01:15:09.000
I forget who he was talking to when he was explaining this.
01:15:13.000
Where he's like, can't we just rewrite it to where that's not in there?
01:15:25.000
You would think at this point it's such a cliche that you would censor yourself and be like, okay, this is almost hack at this point.
01:15:41.000
It's a weird thing to say, hey, that guy with all the big muscles, let's put him in a dress.
01:15:48.000
Give him lipstick and give him a wig and give him high heels and call him Wanda.
01:15:53.000
It's got to be tough, too, where you go, because it's a big break for some people, and you go, I don't want to do this.
01:15:59.000
Well, the Jamie Foxx one, guaranteed it was their idea, because it's just a funny character.
01:16:08.000
I'm kind of like that when it comes to terrorist shit, you know?
01:16:11.000
Because when you're a young performer and actor, sometimes the opportunities come through.
01:16:17.000
They go, hey, will you say Allah Akbar on CSI or some shit?
01:16:22.000
I go, I don't know how much this helps my career, you know?
01:16:26.000
Like, how am I going to level up from saying all Agbar and just like disappearing?
01:16:31.000
So it's really not net positive and I'm trying to be a stand-up comedian.
01:16:35.000
So if I was trying to be an actor, then sometimes you're stuck doing, like Samuel L. Jackson had to do some parts that maybe he didn't love doing early on in his career.
01:16:44.000
For sure, but it's just that particular one, getting black men to dress up like women.
01:16:57.000
And if you think about white men, like muscular white men, how many times have muscular white men been asked to dress up like women for funny?
01:17:14.000
You got Mrs. Doubtfire, but that's a character that he's doing.
01:17:23.000
You don't even know that's Robin Williams under there.
01:17:42.000
You'd be like, what the fuck is going on with this movie?
01:17:47.000
And they go, let's surround him so it's not so obvious.
01:17:52.000
It's like when you get condoms at the store, but then you have a banana and then like some candy just to throw you off the scent.
01:18:09.000
He's the guy that tells John Wick who killed his dog.
01:18:15.000
That's how much Americans, or just people in general, love dogs, where this guy's dog gets killed, and then John Wick murders thousands of people, and then everyone in the movie theater is like, yeah, that checks out.
01:18:37.000
I was trying to watch that movie with my girlfriend because I had heard it.
01:18:40.000
Yeah, and then she's like, no, I don't want to watch it.
01:18:49.000
Also, it's just a jumping off point for the movie.
01:18:51.000
It's not like a puppy's getting worked over for two hours.
01:19:01.000
And she just didn't even like the thought that a puppy gets hurt.
01:19:05.000
So she mentally couldn't ever get into John Wick.
01:19:14.000
I'd be like, no, the puppy lives in this version.
01:19:28.000
Because girls do not want to sit there and watch this handsome man assassinate 150 people.
01:19:38.000
Dude, there's a scene where John Wick goes into the bathhouse and he's trying to kill Vigo's son.
01:19:44.000
And he essentially assassinates all the assassins in the bathhouse.
01:19:50.000
It's like one of the most intense scenes in the history of fucking action movies.
01:19:54.000
It's so good that when I was doing the Sober October challenge with Tom and Ari and Bert, and we had a fitness challenge, and I just stayed on the elliptical machine watching that scene over and over and over again.
01:20:10.000
The first John Wick is absolutely my favorite John Wick.
01:20:20.000
Well, once you get deep in the franchise, it gets cartoony.
01:20:40.000
I feel like if they wheel, I mean, they don't wheel TVs in anymore, but when the teachers turn on Oppenheimer, you know the classes are fucking lit.
01:20:53.000
Yeah, I think a lot of kids are gonna get into science because of the fucking.
01:20:56.000
That's the crazy thing about scientists, man, is that they were all like intellectual rock stars.
01:21:07.000
And I think that was also part of the appeal of being a great scientist, is that you had like groupies.
01:21:15.000
Well, I've noticed that about any profession or art form.
01:21:20.000
If you're a guy and you just excel in whatever field it is you are, there are going to be women who are attracted to that field.
01:21:25.000
Even if it's stamp collecting, just women are attracted to excellence and no matter how niche a thing might be.
01:21:33.000
Professional pool players would always bat way over their heads with girls who played pool.
01:21:37.000
Like guys who are really good pool players, they always did way better with girls than they should have.
01:21:43.000
Like, if I didn't have stand-up, I don't think I would...
01:21:54.000
Have to get the dog trained, because it runs in this train.
01:21:58.000
Like, entertainment is such a rest of development, because...
01:22:02.000
All the trappings of a traditional life are weight if you're trying to make it with a certain thing.
01:22:07.000
So I think we hit these benchmarks later in life.
01:22:10.000
Especially when you have parents who there's a certain time to be doing certain things.
01:22:22.000
But to do what we do is so labor-intensive and hard.
01:22:34.000
If you're going to go down this road, it's 10 years before you're any good.
01:22:40.000
I mean, you can get pretty good before then, but to really say, like, I think that's okay.
01:22:49.000
And also to get some footing career-wise and financially.
01:22:53.000
Only in the last couple of years have I felt kind of comfortable in this as a profession.
01:22:58.000
Because when I left Boeing, it just felt like, did I make a mistake?
01:23:04.000
So it's hard operating from that space of like, is this a viable career?
01:23:11.000
Have I planted enough roots in the comedy game?
01:23:17.000
If you're good, and you believe you're good, you gotta burn the boats.
01:23:23.000
Well, I wouldn't have been doing it if I didn't believe that I had the aptitude.
01:23:27.000
If you have a boat to get back to your air-conditioned house and eat mangoes, you're gonna get back on the fucking boat.
01:24:00.000
I was watching it when it was on SyFy and they were shooting it in Vancouver at the time.
01:24:10.000
One of them is genetically designed and everything.
01:24:14.000
And then Ethan Hawke is like a natural baby, which is kind of a second-class citizen.
01:24:23.000
And there's this point in the movie where they used to race or they used to swim.
01:24:27.000
And the genetically superior brother would always beat the natural baby, Ethan Hawke.
01:24:33.000
And then they kind of lose touch, and at the end, they do it one last time, you know?
01:24:38.000
And so Ethan Hawke is winning, and this isn't supposed to be happening.
01:24:43.000
And he's like, I never saved anything for the swim back.
01:24:51.000
Because he's doing what's not supposed to be happening, you know?
01:24:59.000
I mean, there's one takeaway from me doing Joe Rogan podcast.
01:25:03.000
One time I showed it to a girlfriend and she didn't like it.
01:25:06.000
I think this is one of those movies that I started and something happened.
01:25:19.000
Yeah, I didn't know him and Einstein were boys.
01:25:27.000
You can write a lot of nonsense into a movie after someone's dead.
01:25:45.000
That was a big criticism that people had from the Bruce Lee scene in Once Upon a Time in Hollywood.
01:26:01.000
You know, he's saying that Bruce Lee was, like, known for being very arrogant, and he said something about he had beat Muhammad Ali in a fight.
01:26:14.000
Muhammad Ali, at the time, was 220, 225. The greatest boxer of all time.
01:26:24.000
Especially if you're talking about him in, like, 1967, before they made him retire.
01:26:31.000
Like, if you want to watch how good Muhammad Ali was, watch Muhammad Ali in 1967 when he fights Cleveland Big Cat Williams.
01:26:40.000
Because Cleveland Williams is this murderous puncher, and Muhammad Ali is putting on a show.
01:26:46.000
He's dancing and moving like you can't believe.
01:26:54.000
It's so hard to put it in perspective now because we think about fighters now like we've seen so many great heavyweights.
01:27:00.000
We've seen so many great welterweights and light heavyweights in this.
01:27:13.000
You're going to get a projecting screen and sit down.
01:27:20.000
So you watch whatever the fuck they show you on TV, and no one had ever seen a guy move like that.
01:27:27.000
He moved like Sugar Ray Robinson, who was a 147 pounder.
01:27:31.000
Is there anyone comparable, you would say, nowadays like that?
01:27:34.000
There's no one comparable in terms of how different they were than everyone before them.
01:27:43.000
Can you please show me some of the Cleveland Big Cat Williams Muhammad Ali highlights?
01:27:52.000
You know, he decided when he would take it up a notch.
01:27:56.000
He'd put different paces on you, pop the jab on you, move, make you miss a bunch of times, make you feel stupid.
01:28:09.000
And when you're thinking about boxing in 1967, there's no heavyweights that move like this.
01:28:20.000
So everybody before him moves like Cleveland does.
01:28:23.000
You know, moving forward, looking to land the big power shots.
01:28:47.000
So once he gets loose, he starts opening up with combinations, and he moves away, and Cleveland moves forward, and he pops him with a jab, pops him with a hook.
01:28:58.000
Because now, you know, I can't hit this fucking guy and he can hit me anytime he wants.
01:29:02.000
Which is just, that's not how boxing is in the heavyweight division.
01:29:07.000
You have big power punchers with big jabs and guys with great technique.
01:29:11.000
You got Joe Lewis and, you know, you got Floyd Patterson.
01:29:15.000
You got all these different great heavyweights, but none of them fight like this fucking guy.
01:29:21.000
Did they just slowly charge kind of as a style before Ali?
01:29:25.000
Power punchers in the heavyweight division, they'd just move forward.
01:29:28.000
They would throw good jabs, they had good boxing fundamentals, but they didn't move with the footwork like that.
01:29:35.000
So if you're standing in front of them, the realization after three or four rounds of this is like, I can't take too many more of these.
01:29:41.000
He's not hitting me with one knockout punch, but he's hitting me 150 times in the face.
01:29:46.000
And he's hitting me in a way that I can't hit him back.
01:30:05.000
So this is one of the most tragic, from a boxing fan's perspective, one of the most tragic things in boxing is that they took it away from him for three years, and he was never really this guy again.
01:30:18.000
This guy that you see here in 67, he stopped training.
01:30:21.000
When he came back and fought after that, he just didn't look like the same guy.
01:30:28.000
He didn't maintain his training during those three years off.
01:30:40.000
So that was like the most revolutionary thing in boxing, like that guy in 1967. Like one of the most revolutionary things ever, to see a heavyweight move like that.
01:30:53.000
Yeah, and then he was out of his prime too for a bit, right?
01:31:11.000
That's when he knocked Sonny Liston out in Lewiston, Maine.
01:31:21.000
Knowing that a lot of people suspect that this is a fake fight and that Liston really wasn't hurt that bad, that he took a dive, watch this.
01:31:30.000
As a person who's seen a lot of people get knocked out, I've seen probably more people get knocked out.
01:31:41.000
So a lot of people said that it was a phantom punch.
01:31:44.000
It's an absolute, watch this, over the top, boom.
01:31:51.000
But what happens is when Liston goes down, So he throws his jab, Ali comes over the top, and bang!
01:32:03.000
But when Liston goes down, that's when it gets shenanigans.
01:32:22.000
Because when he gets up, that's when it looks fake.
01:32:45.000
Now this is where it gets a little shenanigan-y.
01:32:55.000
It just looks a little like he's not trying to stop himself from going to his back.
01:33:04.000
So like he gets up and look, he's looking away.
01:33:09.000
So they're not deciding yet whether or not the fight is stopped.
01:33:26.000
But it's also like the humiliation that Liston suffered from the first fight.
01:33:33.000
The first fight when he fought Sonny Liston, Sonny Liston was this murderous puncher, man.
01:33:37.000
He was one of the most murderous punchers ever.
01:33:53.000
He pulled out a gun and shot through the fucking ceiling.
01:34:02.000
Like, if I shoot a gun, this will draw eyeballs.
01:34:07.000
And what Muhammad Ali was doing was trying to get into his head.
01:34:43.000
He just put it in his coat pocket to prove it's a blank.
01:34:51.000
People that put blanks up to their head, the force of the gas coming out of the barrel of the gun can kill you.
01:35:03.000
They have so much protocol whenever there's a gun.
01:35:15.000
Bro, but he would constantly talk shit at every press conference.
01:35:19.000
It got so bad to the point where when they did his like the weigh-in thing, like after the weigh-in, his heart rate was so high, his blood pressure was so high that they had to calm him down or they weren't gonna let him fight.
01:35:32.000
Because he just, like, worked himself up into a frenzy to fuck with Liston.
01:35:36.000
He would show up in front of Liston's house and yell on his front lawn.
01:35:44.000
How crazy to be that gifted as a fighter and that gifted as a shit-talker as well.
01:35:57.000
My parents were hippies, and they had to watch...
01:36:01.000
When Muhammad Ali was rematching Leon Spinks because on television That's how much of like a cultural icon that guy was because he stood against the Vietnam War and that's why he lost three years of his career when he was in his prime in 1967 he's like I'm not going to Vietnam He goes no Viet Cong ever did shit to me.
01:36:22.000
Yeah, I'm not doing this and they took away his ability to box for three years and And, you know, my parents were very anti-war.
01:36:34.000
The whole country was like, this is a person who represented sense.
01:36:39.000
He made sense when the world was going crazy and they were talking people into fighting this nonsense war in Vietnam.
01:36:47.000
And you could possibly lose your life or lose a leg or lose a friend or lose your father or lose your...
01:36:58.000
Was it one of those things that it took years to get clarity on it as a collective whole society?
01:37:02.000
Whereas at the time, he's probably raked over the coals, right?
01:37:07.000
Look, we had associated wars before Vietnam with these just wars, like World War I and World War II. We thought of those as just wars.
01:37:19.000
There's a guy who's hopped up on meth in Germany, and he literally, literally hopped up on meth.
01:37:30.000
They're super complicated and there's a lot of...
01:37:38.000
So when we're at war, if we're at war to stop communism in Vietnam, we, at the time, I think, collectively, there was a lot of, like, hardcore, fucking blue-collar, Republican-type people that were like, yeah, you got to do what the fuck you have to do to protect freedom.
01:37:55.000
But then they didn't know that the whole thing was staged.
01:37:58.000
They didn't know that that Gulf of Tonkin incident was a false flag just to justify us getting into that crazy ass war for who knows what reason.
01:38:09.000
So now people have a different sort of feeling when it comes to war.
01:38:13.000
So do you think that was the first time people became...
01:38:14.000
At this point I would like to play Fuck a War by the Ghetto Boys but Spotify will allow this and...
01:38:42.000
When it started, it was very socially conscious and stuff.
01:38:45.000
I know they're still doing that, but in terms of what becomes popular on a pop scale for rap...
01:39:00.000
And what happens is a certain type of rap gets popular, and then it becomes uncool.
01:39:07.000
Like, being socially conscious is cool, and then just having fun and wiling out is cool.
01:39:15.000
It just becomes a smaller piece of the larger genre pie.
01:39:19.000
And now rap is so big, there's sub-genres of it, like rock, you know, there's indie rock, and now there's emo rap.
01:39:25.000
Well, there always kind of was different genres, even back in the day.
01:39:39.000
But now it's getting so granular, like, even more so.
01:39:49.000
Pop goes the weasel because the weasel goes pop.
01:39:55.000
They had like a diss track against Vanilla Ice.
01:40:11.000
What's interesting is that dude eventually went on to host a daytime talk show.
01:40:22.000
I believe he kept the flat top when he hosted his show.
01:40:27.000
I don't even know how you get that going on as a white guy.
01:40:41.000
And MC Search had a great, great album himself, too.
01:40:44.000
They were good, but for whatever reason, the white guy rapper, there's only one...
01:40:54.000
There's other great white rappers, don't get me wrong.
01:41:00.000
It's amazing what he had to do to be able to be accepted.
01:41:07.000
Because before him, I think young people don't realize, that's what's kind of cool about the younger generation, like Gen Z and stuff, is they just like art.
01:41:16.000
There's a rapper, Rich Brian, he's Asian, and he's great at rapping, but he's like an Asian kid.
01:41:22.000
Whereas before, you weren't able to receive music from a vessel that looks different than what the norm is.
01:41:29.000
Well, and then there was my man Everlast, House of Pain.
01:41:35.000
That was the best of the white rap bands by far.
01:41:43.000
To this day, when that song comes out for the UFC, when someone comes out as that song for a walk-in song, that is a great fucking walk-in song.
01:42:02.000
Oh, just hearing those, you know what it is immediately.
01:42:13.000
This is the beautiful freedom that we have on Spotify.
01:42:16.000
I think we're going to start doing that, Jamie.
01:42:30.000
How is the New Deal different than what you're able to...
01:42:46.000
Well, it's going to be on Apple, Amazon, and YouTube, as well as on Spotify.
01:42:54.000
So it's kind of like the way it was before the move to Spotify.
01:43:03.000
Like, it's instead of, you know, they have a vested interest in being successful everywhere.
01:43:12.000
Oh, is that the thought, like, okay, we're drawing people in via Apple Podcasts, these different YouTube...
01:43:18.000
Right, and they'll make money off of it being on the other shows, too.
01:43:25.000
And its wider distribution is good, and it's just like, look, people get attached to certain platforms.
01:43:32.000
Some people are super attached to Apple, and I used to be as well.
01:43:41.000
You can set it like that so you know when the new episodes are up.
01:43:47.000
So I get if they didn't want to switch over and listen to Spotify.
01:43:50.000
I mean, I knew that when we first started doing it.
01:43:52.000
I was like, a lot of people are going to be like...
01:43:54.000
There's a lot of shit to listen to, which is great.
01:43:56.000
It's a fucking great time if you're interested in listening to stuff.
01:44:01.000
I mean, the amount of audiobooks available are fucking insane.
01:44:07.000
You will always get entertained or educated or something.
01:44:21.000
Yeah, I remember years ago talking to Ari at the store.
01:44:34.000
Just because there's a lot of them doesn't mean there's no place for new ones and such that shit.
01:44:39.000
I used to tell so many people to do a podcast that it was a meme, that it was annoying.
01:44:53.000
But I felt like, and I do feel like, I don't think it's the easiest road, but I think if you're a person who's interesting to talk to, you could find other people that are also interesting to talk to and sit down and people enjoy it.
01:45:08.000
It's like you can do it, but it's going to take some work.
01:45:11.000
So if you dedicate yourself to it and try to figure out what you're doing wrong, what you're doing right, what makes you annoying, what's more interesting, if you do it right, treat it like any other thing, you'll get better at it.
01:45:34.000
It's not like you're filming a sitcom and it costs so much, a soundstage.
01:45:37.000
The overhead is so low to do a podcast, so it's worth the trial of doing it.
01:45:42.000
And also I think just in the stand-up space, it's a great two-hander.
01:45:47.000
You don't always put a special out all the time.
01:45:49.000
And being able to check in with your fans week to week, they like that.
01:45:55.000
And then they kind of want to know what your baseline is offstage as well.
01:45:58.000
Because then they feel closer to you as a performer.
01:46:01.000
Access is the new mystery, I feel like, in entertainment.
01:46:04.000
Whereas before, it was like, oh, Humphrey Bogart or these starlets.
01:46:22.000
The only guy who doesn't have to play that game anymore is Daniel Day-Lewis.
01:46:28.000
No one's telling Daniel Day-Lewis to live tweet his movie.
01:46:32.000
Well, there's certain actors that are on the fringes, right?
01:46:34.000
Not on the fringes, meaning everybody knows who they are, but they might not be the first pick for a big project.
01:46:41.000
And the only way they think they can keep their name out there is to do stuff.
01:46:45.000
So they have to get photographed on red carpets and they have to...
01:46:48.000
Sometimes they tell the paparazzi where they're going to be.
01:46:52.000
They have publicists that set things up so you can casually see them doing something.
01:46:58.000
Fucking intimate, like working out on the beach.
01:47:11.000
Your business is you, and this is a business decision that you're making.
01:47:16.000
But it's just like, that's a different thing than comics.
01:47:19.000
With us, the best thing that we have going on is this network of all of us.
01:47:28.000
Because now, instead of relying on Comedy Central to tell you who's good, It's a total meritocracy and it's almost always entirely based on are you funny and are you fun?
01:47:40.000
And if you're funny and fun to hang around with, yay!
01:47:53.000
And now this is like a viable release route for me.
01:48:02.000
And also, who better than other comedians to know what's what in the field?
01:48:12.000
Whereas sometimes you get so high up at these corporations, they're like, okay, we need this demo.
01:48:22.000
They should not be in control of this art form.
01:48:48.000
Like, these Hollywood opportunities don't help me as a stand-up comedian anymore.
01:48:55.000
So, if you have a really good manager, a really good manager is very beneficial because they can strategize with you about what you do, and what the pros and cons of what you do are, And what's the best business decision?
01:49:09.000
And how do you feel artistically about your set now?
01:49:14.000
Have we thought about holding off for six months?
01:49:17.000
Yeah, there's value in that if you find the right person and they're keyed into what you're doing.
01:49:22.000
But sometimes you go places, you're just part of a roster.
01:49:38.000
But when you're a young comic and you're coming up, the idea of being in a management company is a fucking huge deal.
01:49:44.000
And it is an opportunity, too, because they can get you some things that you're not going to get without it.
01:50:10.000
The bro instantly negates the I'm deep, is what I love.
01:50:31.000
Are you going to be like a hypebeast just sitting in line waiting to get equipped?
01:50:39.000
Just like the people that wouldn't wear shoes forever.
01:50:52.000
The guys get to a certain point and he's like, yeah, they were right.
01:51:00.000
I think at a certain point in time, everyone's going to get something.
01:51:03.000
There's going to be some benefits to whatever it is, some interface, whether you wear it or whether it's a part of your body.
01:51:10.000
There's going to be benefits that you can't get without it.
01:51:20.000
I don't want to be walking around my fucking house.
01:51:24.000
I'm afraid I'm going to be sitting in my office watching movies instead of doing shit that I should be doing.
01:51:29.000
They show images of people on a plane with an Apple Vision Pro.
01:51:33.000
I would just be so mortified to have that strapped to my head on a plane.
01:51:38.000
Oh, I would definitely strap it to my head on a plane.
01:51:46.000
You can watch Avatar in 3D on this fucking plane while you're smelling that guy next to you's farts.
01:51:56.000
You're in the fucking jungle and all of a sudden you're like, Jesus Christ!
01:51:59.000
It's just funny to think of an Apple Vision Pro and then going like...
01:52:10.000
I mean, not anymore for you, but you're next to the laboratory.
01:52:17.000
Yeah, sometimes I don't book a seat because it'll be extra if you do it ahead of time.
01:52:22.000
And then if you leave it to the machine, sometimes you get fucked.
01:52:25.000
Bro, dropping a log on a public flight is a nightmare.
01:52:35.000
If you've ever shit on a plane, it's the pinnacle of technology.
01:52:44.000
Sometimes I think about like, man, what if the plane was see-through or something?
01:52:48.000
Is that sometimes when that shit, you know, it basically freezes into like a brick.
01:52:56.000
I don't know how they dispose of it normally, but I know that like people's houses have been hit by shit bricks.
01:53:05.000
I would hope you get a good payoff if frozen shit from 250 passengers falls from the sky and hits your fucking house.
01:53:14.000
A frozen piece of shit from a Delta flight rocked me, but I got the money I deserve.
01:53:19.000
How do they normally get rid of that stuff, Jamie?
01:53:21.000
I would imagine they pump it when they land or something.
01:53:25.000
But I do know that there's at least one story that I read about a house that got hit with a rock of shit.
01:53:35.000
It might have been some irresponsible fucking cargo plane.
01:53:41.000
When they dropped a bunch of shit from the tour bus and it landed on some people?
01:53:50.000
I don't think Dave Matthews greenlit it, but whoever was riding the...
01:53:56.000
Like, they emptied the bilge tube, and it just, like...
01:53:59.000
I might have even gotten people that were in one of those boats that went underneath it.
01:54:14.000
I can't get rid of that shit right here in the river, bro.
01:54:22.000
The afternoon of August 8, 2004, at this very location, the Dave Matthews Band tour bus emptied the septic tank over the Chicago River.
01:54:32.000
Drenching passengers on a boat tour with 800 pounds of human poop.
01:54:44.000
The poop falling from the sky thing here is interesting.
01:54:51.000
Could you imagine you just open the pipe over the water on a bridge?
01:55:06.000
There's not a boat filled with a tour of people.
01:55:12.000
You're taking in all these wonderful buildings.
01:55:18.000
Do you think you feel better when you find out it's Dave Matthews, though?
01:55:31.000
He got 18 months of probation on 50 hours community service.
01:55:36.000
$10,000 fine, which was paid to the Friends of Chicago River.
01:55:43.000
The bus, which is reportedly being used by the band violinist Boyd Tinsley, was not occupied at the time of the incident that Dave Matthews Band eventually agreed to pay $200,000 to settle a lawsuit filed by State Attorney General Lisa Madigan.
01:56:01.000
I almost feel like we're watching a movie and it's like the end of the text.
01:56:33.000
Bro, how about drain that thing before it gets to 800 pounds?
01:56:39.000
Reading the thing about the planes, I've never even thought of this, and this is disgusting.
01:56:49.000
There's apparently a law, for example, sewage needs to be treated if it's going to be flushed within three miles of the coastline.
01:56:56.000
But when they're out in the middle of nowhere, they just flush it?
01:56:59.000
Average cruise ship generates an average of 21,000 gallons of sewage and 170,000 gallons of what they call gray water.
01:57:07.000
Which is water from the drains of sinks, showers, laundry machines, and has all sorts of stuff.
01:57:17.000
They just send in the elderly Japanese people to fix the septic leak in there.
01:57:24.000
Oh, and on the space station, since urine is 90% water, they kind of reuse some of it, it says.
01:57:31.000
Yeah, they recycle the water, it sends to a processor.
01:57:40.000
Have you done cruise ship, stand up on a cruise ship?
01:57:45.000
They took cargo boats and for the UN climate change standards, they changed the emission standards of these cargo boats and a very unexpected thing happened.
01:58:00.000
So the haze in the sky was actually cooling things off.
01:58:03.000
So the fucking pollution from these cargo ships, the diminishing of the pollution from the cargo ships actually made the water warmer.
01:58:12.000
The total opposite thing that they wanted to happen, happen.
01:58:22.000
A lot of this climate change speculation is all about whoops.
01:58:26.000
There's a lot of, oh, whoa, we didn't see that coming.
01:58:28.000
What scares the fuck out of me, dude, is Ice Age.
01:58:37.000
Because there's not a goddamn thing you could do about it.
01:58:40.000
I'm not happy if the world gets warmer and we lose California.
01:58:49.000
This is the reason why Atlantis is at the bottom of the ocean, kids.
01:58:56.000
I was here when there was that blizzard in Austin.
01:59:03.000
When these crazy fuckers are talking about spraying things in the sky to cool the earth down, like, hey, hey, hey.
01:59:13.000
Not you wacky dudes talking to strange scientists in the middle of the Pentagon.
01:59:22.000
Let's all talk this through before you spray the sky to cool the Earth off and bring in hell.
01:59:36.000
Take it from a guy who's been camping in Montana.
01:59:45.000
You don't want fucking mile-high caps of ice over most of North America like it was 10,000 years ago.
01:59:54.000
It gets to like 50 in LA and I'm like, this is cold.
02:00:17.000
I thought Miami was going to be underwater by now.
02:00:25.000
Like we'd be swimming in this podcast video right now?
02:00:33.000
I can tell you I'm not wearing my Garmin watch.
02:00:36.000
I have a watch that'll tell you where you're at.
02:00:41.000
The Apple watch is kind of like the Prius of watches.
02:00:45.000
Well, Apple Watch is a great watch, and the Ultra is the shit.
02:00:53.000
It's just bigger, more battery, more features, a larger screen.
02:00:59.000
This is so dumb, but the biggest feature I use on this watch is when I'm cooking and I'm like, set timer for two minutes.
02:01:10.000
Well, you know, Red Band is like a giant tech guy.
02:01:34.000
If you do get it, you will have such an advantage.
02:01:38.000
If it does work, the thing is, if it works, and what are the side effects, and how long does it last, and what if it breaks, and what if Russia hacks it.
02:01:48.000
What if, like, the moment it gets to a certain number of people that have it, China flips a switch?
02:01:53.000
I mean, just something being in your brain is such a big cell, right?
02:02:01.000
But then there's toxoplasmosis, which is in there for 40% of us.
02:02:06.000
The stuff we talked about earlier, the cat thing.
02:02:12.000
Yeah, maybe the cell phone thing will be like a neurological, electronic toxo.
02:02:21.000
Well, initially, the first person that they did it on, which is fairly recently, is a person who's paralyzed, and through Neuralink, he can now move a cursor around, and he can do things, and he's going to be able to express himself,
02:02:36.000
the way Elon said, at the speed of a carnival barker.
02:02:43.000
So the idea is that he'll be able to communicate, which is for a person who's been paralyzed and can't operate a cursor or a computer.
02:02:55.000
They eventually think they may be able to use it to let people who have been paralyzed move.
02:03:05.000
What is the work that's been done on that specifically, Jamie?
02:03:10.000
The people being able to eventually, they hope that it'd be able to restore movement to people with nerve damage.
02:03:17.000
Right now, I think there's still, when I've looked this up online, there's a little bit of a pushback from some people.
02:03:23.000
Because the only way that this has been announced that it works is just Elon's tweet.
02:03:27.000
There hasn't been any other proof, I guess, if you will.
02:03:43.000
I imagine he's so busy, I doubt he's hanging there every day.
02:03:58.000
Well, he came to a bunch of our shows when we did Stubbs.
02:04:03.000
It's like that was when there was nothing to do.
02:04:08.000
When I had that writing job, it was like Willy Wonka.
02:04:10.000
You're like, hey, I'm doing a show with me and Chappelle at Stubbs.
02:04:15.000
I'm in a writer's room, and it's kind of boring.
02:04:18.000
And to get this awesome call to the bullpen, like, yo, do you want to come?
02:04:26.000
I'm like, hey, guys, I might do a show with Joe Rogan and Dave Chappelle later tonight.
02:04:40.000
You know, cause like this is very cool for them.
02:04:45.000
They're very supportive and stuff and stand-up is kind of like rock star-y and they were very cool.
02:04:49.000
Like, yeah, please take the, leave 30 minutes early, do the show, tell us how it is.
02:04:56.000
And then you pick me up in your fucking muscle car.
02:05:03.000
I told you I was going to pick you up in the coolest car you've ever seen in your life.
02:05:14.000
And then Chappelle, you showed him the car, I remember, after the show.
02:05:27.000
This was just such a surreal night for me because we do the show.
02:05:33.000
It's an alternate universe where comedy is happening and it's not happening in LA. The show's amazing.
02:05:43.000
I'm just so grateful to be asked to do the show and you already drove me.
02:05:47.000
So all the comics and Dave's friends and stuff are piled in the car.
02:06:02.000
So Dave Chappelle has to, like, do the human thing of, like, pushing his seat up.
02:06:08.000
So I'm like, excuse me, Mr. Chappelle, can I? Yeah!
02:06:12.000
So I'm having to squish Chappelle to get into the back of this car, and then you're just like, you're ripping.
02:06:19.000
And I just thought like, man, if I died in this car, I would not make the article.
02:06:26.000
It would say Joe Rogan, Dave Chappelle, and like two other guys died.
02:06:36.000
But at that moment, at that moment, no, I would be a guy.
02:06:44.000
Those shows at Stubbs were like medicine, you know?
02:06:48.000
I didn't really realize how much we needed to have a good time and get together.
02:06:54.000
That's one of the things I noticed when I was doing stand-up out here is the thirst.
02:07:00.000
As much as we needed it, the audience needed it, too, to have that kind of release and something to go to rather than just being in your house all day.
02:07:16.000
One of the things we did at the shows The Vulcan, like, how many guys had COVID? And, like, more than half the crowd would raise their hands.
02:07:34.000
People started treating it like a regular cold.
02:07:37.000
Well, I feel like that's what it is now, kind of.
02:07:42.000
You're one of those people that talks outside with a fucking mask on.
02:07:54.000
Unless you're an old person and you're really scared and you have a bad immune system, I get it.
02:07:58.000
When I see it at the grocery store, it's like seeing someone in a throwback jersey.
02:08:06.000
There's a lot of people that still believe in it.
02:08:08.000
They still believe that you can breathe through something and it protects you from a terrible disease.
02:08:12.000
Could you imagine, like, thinking that the plague is in this neighborhood?
02:08:16.000
Like some fucking 28 days later disease is in this neighborhood.
02:08:19.000
You can just put a little paper mask over your face.
02:08:26.000
Because that's one of the major ways that people get infected.
02:08:32.000
Like your eyes, like when people sneeze, you get it in your eyes.
02:08:40.000
You'll see like rapid COVID testing places on corners.
02:08:44.000
And I almost look at those as like a psychic spot.
02:08:53.000
I know a bunch of people who tested negative turned out to be positive.
02:09:00.000
There's a hundred different fucking strains now.
02:09:03.000
Who knows how many different variants are there now?
02:09:15.000
I say there's 14. I say 14. I'll say 15. I'm going to Price is Right you.
02:09:37.000
I got to walk behind the set of Price is Right while it was taping.
02:09:42.000
Yeah, because my girlfriend at the time- Was Drew Carey doing it?
02:09:58.000
As a nice guy, just as part of the writer's strike.
02:10:00.000
If you were in the WGA or whatever, all your meals were covered.
02:10:09.000
He came by that Hollywood Improv one time that was kind of cool, because he's not a guy who pops in a ton.
02:10:13.000
Yeah, I met him at the Improv one night, and he was giving really good advice to some young comic.
02:10:19.000
He was saying just if you could write one-minute joke every day.
02:10:25.000
Over time, you'd be surprised at how much material you could write.
02:10:33.000
And then if you are regimented about it, when you look back at your notes, you've done all the work.
02:10:46.000
But every now and then, if I keep mining, I find something cool.
02:11:09.000
There's a under-monitoring, which has got two, so we're at five.
02:11:13.000
So it's five under-monitoring, and now de-escalated.
02:11:39.000
How scary is that they keep doing this gain-of-function research?
02:11:48.000
Gain of function is when you take a virus and you engineer it to make it so that it works on humans.
02:11:55.000
So they'll take a virus that works on bats and they'll engineer it so that human beings can catch it.
02:12:27.000
It doesn't mean it's not a fucking terrible idea.
02:12:32.000
Do you guys know how to stop these things from happening?
02:12:35.000
Because it seems like you didn't stop that last one.
02:12:36.000
So what benefit are we getting from the potential of you unleashing deadly super viruses to the world?
02:12:45.000
And is this a thing where, because you can do it, you do it, because you can get funding, because that's what you studied in school?
02:13:02.000
Well, if you agree with what we say, and publicly, we'll give you funds, and you can do research.
02:13:08.000
And, oh, it's not legal for us to fund that research?
02:13:11.000
Why don't we fund this company and We could say, I don't know what you're talking about.
02:13:16.000
And then, you know, you could change what you describe as gain of function.
02:13:28.000
And at the end of the day, it's pretty clear that shit came from a lab.
02:13:32.000
It's pretty clear to all the people that are making any fucking sense that aren't gaslighting the fuck out of you.
02:13:39.000
I always thought about, like, what if you're the guy who loved batwing soup and it was getting a bad rap unnecessarily?
02:13:59.000
Remember they were trying to pin it on the pangolin?
02:14:11.000
If that thing was gigantic, storming through a village, imagine?
02:14:15.000
I mean, imagine a monster, like it's eating ants here, but imagine just eating humans.
02:14:21.000
Imagine just plowing through some fucking thatch huts.
02:14:25.000
Just ripping people's legs apart in front of their families.
02:14:37.000
No, I did it because, like, I did it to get people to do it.
02:14:51.000
Are some of them pretty good or are they all gross?
02:15:04.000
You get over the fact that you're eating a bug and the squish in your mouth, but it doesn't taste like much.
02:15:09.000
And the thing about bugs is people have been eating bugs forever.
02:15:33.000
Were the crew people like, you don't have to do this?
02:15:35.000
No, I was doing it to try to get this girl to do it.
02:15:38.000
She wound up eating worms instead, which I thought was worse.
02:15:51.000
Well, the process of sitcoms is great when it's up and running.
02:16:07.000
And the writers are busting their ass, and the actors are...
02:16:17.000
Like, I heard these 16-hour days are with single cams and stuff.
02:16:21.000
The thing is you have to figure out a way to make it a well-oiled machine, and that takes a long time.
02:16:37.000
We eventually got to the point where we didn't even have to work five days a week.
02:16:43.000
So we'd come in, there would be a table read, then there'd be some revisions.
02:16:46.000
The writers would get together and they'd come up with new scripts.
02:16:53.000
Like that was their thing to get silly, to like be exhausted.
02:16:57.000
They'd just get completely delirious and write the most ridiculous shit.
02:17:01.000
They would come stumbling in like barely awake at like nine in the morning when we're all there.
02:17:07.000
And some of them, sometimes they didn't finish.
02:17:09.000
Sometimes they had like one half of the script and they were still tightening up the second half.
02:17:13.000
So they'd give you the first half of the script, you'd work on it until lunch.
02:17:16.000
Everybody ate lunch and then they would come back with the second half of the script and you'd work the rest of it out.
02:17:21.000
And in the beginning it was exciting and it was fun and everything, but I was like, this is not my jam.
02:17:34.000
But eventually I was like, I just like doing stand-up.
02:17:39.000
And then this show, Fear Factor, I was like, this is going to get cancelled immediately.
02:17:43.000
Like, you're sucking dogs on people on television and making them eat animal dicks?
02:17:56.000
Well, they didn't know who was going to host it.
02:18:01.000
It was NBC. So I had just been on NBC for news radio and so I had a relationship with them.
02:18:05.000
And so then when this came up, it was just like they said, you know, there was two thoughts.
02:18:15.000
Like a sports guy, you know, like fear is not a factor for them, like down the middle, or someone who's like laughing while this crazy shit was going on.
02:18:27.000
Well, you had to make fun of some of it because it was so crazy that you were doing this.
02:18:31.000
And some of the things I was like, don't do it.
02:18:37.000
No one's paying you enough to ride a fucking bull.
02:18:44.000
Do what you want, but you don't have health insurance.
02:18:47.000
They were trying to tell me that it was stunt bulls.
02:18:49.000
Like, that bull does not know it's a stunt bull.
02:18:53.000
That's a giant fucking angry animal that doesn't want you on its back.
02:18:57.000
And you're getting, like, untrained people, and you're putting a helmet on them.
02:19:04.000
Hoping their arm doesn't get shattered into a fucking million pieces if they're lucky.
02:19:23.000
Well, it's like, hey, this is the game we play.
02:19:26.000
And then also- We saw that guy jumping over the bulls.
02:19:30.000
But he's willingly doing that and he's in control.
02:19:36.000
But, in their defense, there are people that go on Fear Factor, or that went on Fear Factor, that were like serious fucking athletes, and they excelled at a lot of these things.
02:19:47.000
And you're like, oh, well if you're a real athlete, you could do some of this shit, and you could do it better than everybody else.
02:19:52.000
Just like you could play football better than everybody else, or wrestle better than everybody else.
02:19:59.000
Like we had a celebrity one in The Miz, WWE, The Miz.
02:20:08.000
Like he held his breath underwater while he was swimming for like two fucking minutes or three minutes.
02:20:15.000
They had to dive into water and do a bunch of shit and come out.
02:20:17.000
I forget what it was, but I was like, that guy's a stud.
02:20:22.000
Like, me as a person who's, like, I've tried to hold my breath for long periods of time underwater.
02:20:29.000
That water's cold as shit, which really freaks you out when you get in there.
02:20:34.000
If you're not accustomed to jumping into cold water, it's very difficult to stay relaxed.
02:20:38.000
And this dude's swimming around in there for, like, three minutes.
02:20:42.000
So there's like, yeah, you shouldn't ride a bull.
02:20:47.000
But some of those fucking things that people do, it's like, if you're a real athlete, you can excel at a lot of these things.
02:20:56.000
I mean, some shows we gave away a million dollars, but that was only a couple of them.
02:20:59.000
Most of the time they got like, I think it was 50 grand.
02:21:02.000
But then after taxes, it's only like 34. The government's like, I ate those dicks.
02:21:12.000
The government didn't eat any dicks, and they get 16 grand.
02:21:16.000
Yeah, they ate zero dick, and they get 16. And I gotta give my dick money to this guy?
02:21:20.000
You get all the dick, you get 34. Fortunately, praise the baby Jesus, nobody got hurt.
02:21:29.000
I'm sure it was an ironclad contract that these people signed.
02:21:35.000
But I legitimately thought it was gonna be cancelled immediately.
02:21:44.000
And then it got cancelled the second time because people had to drink jizz.
02:21:47.000
Because it got released on TMZ. They got a hold of the video and the photo.
02:22:12.000
I don't think they called it donkey jizz, though.
02:22:21.000
You know, there's a budget when you're working on a show.
02:22:36.000
When he's like, people will pay one million dollars for one drop of my sperm.
02:22:45.000
They called it donkey juice, but I think that's just because donkey is a funnier name than mule juice.
02:22:56.000
So one had to drink urine and one had to drink jizz.
02:22:59.000
And depending upon your score, depending upon how many ounces you had to drink.
02:23:07.000
And that's another show where I said, don't do it.
02:23:13.000
I'm like, this is, first of all- This is outrageous and I've seen a lot of stuff.
02:23:19.000
From episode like four on, I would take pot edibles for every show.
02:23:29.000
But that was one day where I was like, you guys are freaking me out.
02:23:35.000
Did you know that this could be the end, like doing this stunt?
02:23:46.000
Yeah, I was the one who was stepping in and going, hey guys.
02:23:48.000
You can't make people drink jizz on television while people are eating dinner.
02:23:56.000
Can you imagine trying to explain that to little kids all over the world?
02:24:11.000
Well, they're way more chill with mule jizz out there.
02:24:17.000
Well, Fear Factor actually started out in Holland.
02:24:24.000
And then they bought it and then changed it to Fear Factor and brought it to America.
02:24:31.000
I guess every game show is just a remix of something overseas.
02:24:36.000
But what it was for me, dude, was like my escape package.
02:24:46.000
Because then I could just do whatever I wanted.
02:24:48.000
And that's when the podcast came after I was done with that.
02:24:51.000
Yeah, you have a great sixth sense for just like, not even stumbling, but just like knowing what the next thing is, you know?
02:24:58.000
Like Fear Factor gave you a nice parachute away from sitcom and all that stuff you didn't like, and then podcasting was a nice runway to get into that, and then you were so early to UFC too, you know?
02:25:08.000
The UFC thing, that was the craziest, because I was into the UFC when it was in 1997. I remember when you had to go through a beaded curtain to watch UFC. In Hollywood video, I had to go through a beaded curtain.
02:25:24.000
Yeah, you had to walk by porno and shit to get to UFC tapes.
02:25:27.000
I was at my friend Leo Mariama, I believe is his last name, this Japanese kid.
02:25:33.000
He had a UFC tape for his birthday party, and he popped that in.
02:25:43.000
These guys are beating the shit out of each other.
02:25:48.000
So I started working for them in 97. UFC 12 in Dothan, Alabama.
02:25:55.000
It was like a half filled high school auditorium looking place.
02:26:00.000
TV. Getting on Spike TV. It's one of those things where people just need to see it.
02:26:05.000
They need to see it to know how exciting it is.
02:26:08.000
You know there's certain things that people just don't know yet.
02:26:10.000
And then they got it on Spike TV. It was all Dana White and the Fertitta brothers.
02:26:15.000
They were like $40 million in debt before it really hit.
02:26:21.000
Did they have a venture before UFC? They owned casinos.
02:26:25.000
So they were wealthy, but they were fucking hemorrhaging money.
02:26:34.000
You know, I was like, God damn, just the world needs to see.
02:26:42.000
What fighting is, is something that's in human beings' DNA. And when you see a really great fight between two highly skilled At the peak of condition, just warriors, the best in the world.
02:26:59.000
And we see them going to war inside of a cage with these little gloves on and shorts and no shoes on, just fucking teeing off on each other.
02:27:13.000
A real high-level championship fight, there's nothing like it, man.
02:27:20.000
And if they could see it, they could see what I see.
02:27:28.000
I know you're trying to hit that thing with the paddle.
02:27:33.000
But fighting, anyone can wrap their head around.
02:27:44.000
You get that guy in an armbar and break his arm.
02:28:25.000
And it's hard for guys to know when to stop playing it.
02:28:48.000
And then he came back and he fought Michael Bisping for the middleweight title and beat him.
02:29:14.000
He had a great example of what is possible, like that you can be one of the greatest of all time, without a doubt.
02:29:22.000
George St. Pierre will go down in history as one of the greatest mixed martial artists of all time, for sure.
02:29:27.000
He's definitely in the conversation of the GOAT. You know, there's a few people that are in that conversation, but he's definitely in there.
02:29:42.000
He got out at the right time, and he's got all his faculties, and he's doing great.
02:29:47.000
But for every one of George St. Pierre, there's guys...
02:29:59.000
It sucks to see old guys that are just broken down, man.
02:30:11.000
It's just such a brutal, brutal way to make a living.
02:30:16.000
But yeah, when I started getting into that, man, it was like doing porn.
02:30:38.000
It's a great lesson in just following what your passion is, and then the rest kind of like falls into place.
02:30:51.000
Remember that movie with Charlie Sheen and some other dude?
02:31:09.000
It was like 1980s Porsches, which were really cool little cars, man.
02:31:14.000
It's such a different thing than a Porsche of today.
02:31:16.000
Those little, like, minimized, little sporty cars.
02:31:22.000
And the whole movie is just like a love affair.
02:31:38.000
The whole movie's about, if you get this movie and watch it, you don't want to buy an old Porsche?
02:31:45.000
Remember Italian Job, where it was just like a mini commercial?
02:32:05.000
They'll see if they saw a car, like, let's get it.
02:32:17.000
And Charlie Sheen's going, this guy's got a cabriolet.
02:32:40.000
By the way, if you have a convertible, can't you just cut the top?
02:33:44.000
It's awesome to watch them speed away in his little Porsches.
02:34:48.000
You know, he was in one good movie that people sleep on.
02:35:07.000
There's the new one where the spaceship looks like a coffee bean.
02:35:27.000
It's like it doesn't get the credit it deserves.
02:35:31.000
But then there's the other Arrival, which is really cool.
02:35:36.000
Because that one, to me, feels more like what it probably would be like.
02:35:40.000
Yeah, like how do we communicate with these beings.
02:35:47.000
Oh, that's just Arrival, and the other one is The Arrival.
02:36:07.000
It's Alien, and then there's everybody else playing for second best.
02:36:19.000
That might be the best UFO alien movie, but the best in-space alien movie is Alien.
02:36:25.000
I'm trying to be serious, because Men in Black is a good movie.
02:36:33.000
But as far as movies, you'd say you have to see this movie, like the original Alien, Ridley Scott.
02:36:43.000
And that was a movie where Sigourney Weaver was the lead badass woman, which was a rare thing.
02:36:53.000
If I had to think of a successful mainstream movie superheroine...
02:37:31.000
But yeah, there'd be no Michelle Rodriguez without Sigourney Weaver.
02:37:35.000
She was in Aliens 2. She was in Aliens 2 with Sigourney Weaver.
02:37:43.000
Because the Alien, the Covenant, that's a really good one.
02:37:55.000
Were you talking about the one with the Native American lady?
02:38:03.000
Is it as good as the Charlie Sheen Porsche heist movie?
02:38:19.000
They even went, like, when they gave up, they went Predator vs.
02:38:25.000
I feel like there was a Taco Bell tie-in, I'm sure.
02:38:32.000
You weren't really wrong, because Pam Grier's Jackie Brown, right?
02:38:44.000
The thing about it is, though, I don't think they were big action movies.
02:38:49.000
Like, when you got a budget, like a Sigourney Weaver is the lead of a Ripley Scott film.
02:39:15.000
Like that one dude, Tom Sherrick, whatever the fuck his name is.
02:39:33.000
Because that's probably what it's going to be like.
02:39:39.000
I mean, there's a lot of different instances in the wild of creatures doing that.
02:39:51.000
It kills spiders and injects them with its babies and the babies like feed off the carcass of the spider.
02:39:59.000
Isn't there one where there's like this parasite that grows out of an ant's head?
02:40:05.000
That's what that movie The Last of Us is based on.
02:40:12.000
Someone, maybe it was a Reddit thread, they were saying, because they tried to port over video game movies for so long, and they could never get it right.
02:40:19.000
And I think the person in this thread was saying, like, the kids are finally old enough and becoming directors where they can do the source material justice.
02:40:28.000
Whereas before, it's just these people who are trying to make a Mortal Kombat film, but they didn't grow up with, they don't have a love letter to it, you know?
02:40:36.000
And now we're getting to see great video game IP flourish.
02:40:41.000
But it also has to be something like HBO, where someone's willing to let someone, you know, get really wild.
02:40:58.000
Yeah, when I was coming up, I mean, just the video game movies that existed.
02:41:06.000
So as a kid, you loved watching these movies, but they weren't good.
02:41:15.000
Dragon's Lair was a game that everybody used to play in the 1980s, and it was like a cartoon of each thing that you did.
02:41:27.000
You get to see whether or not you were successful.
02:41:29.000
So you would do this little move, and if you slipped and fell, or if the knight got you or a dragon got you, you would die.
02:41:38.000
So instead of it being like an interactive cartoon, it was like semi-interactive.
02:41:42.000
Like you've made the right choices, it would do the right thing.
02:41:47.000
And then you would be hitting your joystick, getting it to go through these doors.
02:41:52.000
And then every time you did it, like this little video would play out.
02:41:57.000
And it was the first time there was ever anything like this.
02:42:00.000
Where there was like a game that you could watch like a cartoon movie.
02:42:06.000
And depending upon whether you did the right thing or the wrong thing, you would see this happen or you'd see you get killed.
02:42:17.000
So this is all the things that you would have to do to be successful.
02:42:21.000
And every time you would do it, this little video would play out.
02:42:26.000
It's like, you know, dragons and knights and shit.
02:42:31.000
But, you know, compare that to World of Warcraft or compare that to, you know, what's the big one?
02:42:46.000
This was an arcade game that was like Dragon's Lair.
02:42:51.000
The only thing that was really cool about this is this was holograms.
02:42:54.000
So this was like floating above your controllers.
02:42:59.000
It was like these weird little videos I would play for like an Old West character.
02:43:04.000
Like this doesn't do any justice to why how cool it was.
02:43:07.000
Oh, so in real life, when you're watching it on the video screen, it's a hologram.
02:43:15.000
That's how I remember playing about Dragon Slayer.
02:43:17.000
That guy just busted that blank a little too close to that dude's body for my liking.
02:43:24.000
It's not like they had one guy and they spliced in the second guy.
02:43:42.000
But it's kind of cool because I post that dance video sometimes and I guess their programmers found one of my YouTube...
02:43:52.000
But like they just hit me up and they go, hey, the game's going to use this excerpt of you dancing as like a skin or an emote.
02:44:01.000
It's still one of my favorite credits in Hollywood because it's just so weird and bizarre.
02:44:12.000
So if you look at the vibin' emote, that's me dancing.
02:44:17.000
So they just took an excerpt from me when I was dancing in my apartment in Koreatown.
02:44:22.000
Sometimes if I really like a song, I'll just set the camera up and dance to it.
02:44:32.000
There's so many little kids that probably know the shit out of this dance.
02:44:49.000
Yeah, I don't think they needed to pay you for that.
02:44:51.000
I think they could have just snuck that in if they were less scrupulous.
02:44:55.000
But I think they were under hot water because it was a moment in time where people were kind of upset that they were lifting some of the dances.
02:45:21.000
And then there was some sort of, hey, people should be getting paid.
02:45:26.000
And there was this gray area of, like, should we pay these people?
02:45:30.000
So this kid is saying that that was his move and they stole it?
02:45:34.000
Well, they probably patched it up and played nice and everything, but he's the inventor of that dance.
02:45:42.000
I don't know if anybody else claimed it or tried to say that it was them.
02:45:49.000
It's a strange move, too, so I don't know how he wouldn't have.
02:45:57.000
Some dude did this Michael Jackson thing the other day.
02:45:59.000
Like, he high-fived this dude and then immediately started moonwalking.
02:46:06.000
It's so interesting seeing social media get to a place where there are viable careers in these spaces that didn't exist before, like Charli D'Amelio or whatever.
02:46:17.000
You could just be a cute girl dancing on TikTok, and you used to have to be able to sing, and they would send you to acting school if you were just a pretty person.
02:46:26.000
They had to give you these other skill sets, and now you can just dance to certain songs.
02:46:33.000
Because at least if you're a person who sings songs, people really love my songs.
02:46:36.000
She probably sings now, but it was a springboard.
02:46:44.000
Just imagine being famous just for being alive.
02:46:53.000
It's also interesting because when I got into comedy, fame was a byproduct.
02:46:57.000
But I think with younger people, sometimes they just want to be famous and they don't really care or know what for.
02:47:05.000
We were shooting this Sonic commercial years ago.
02:47:07.000
And kids saw a camera, so many of them would say, make me famous!
02:47:12.000
It wasn't, I want to do a thing that I love and then become famous.
02:47:17.000
Fame is a byproduct, not, I don't know if it should be the goal.
02:47:31.000
You should be happy if you're doing what you like to do.
02:47:34.000
You know, the idea of just being happy just by fame, that's a trick.
02:47:37.000
And that's going to come with a lot of problems of its own, and you don't want them.
02:47:43.000
You're better off just concentrating on what you love to do and just try to get good at it.
02:47:50.000
You're going to do some stuff that you wish you hadn't done.
02:47:52.000
You're going to say some things you wish you hadn't said.
02:47:55.000
It's going to come with a lot of extra baggage.
02:48:01.000
There are some parts of it that are fun, but then it also impedes your life.
02:48:05.000
Well, it depends on if that's all you do, right?
02:48:08.000
Like, there's people out there that are, you know, air quotes influencers.
02:48:11.000
All they do is, like, either, you know, the Kardashians or whoever you are, you're doing something and you're making videos.
02:48:26.000
Crazy backflips and, you know, climbing mountains.
02:48:36.000
But it's also being around famous people and, you know, oh my God, it's the glamorous life.
02:48:42.000
And if you edit it correctly, we do a nice fast, keep my attention span moving, you can suck me in for years.
02:48:48.000
Yeah, you forget editing is such a strong necessity nowadays, too.
02:48:56.000
I mean, it's hyperbole, but a great editor can really elevate some content.
02:49:04.000
But editing, when you're trying to grab people's attention in 20, 30 seconds, with all the zooms and all these psychological tricks, too, like shaking it, having the text come in.
02:49:13.000
So now even to promote as a younger comic, people coming up, you have to be aware of, you might have a great bit, but you have to have it be a little cuttier than it would be live.
02:49:28.000
So you have to give yourself, I don't know, the benefit of the doubt or set yourself up for success via editing.
02:49:37.000
Yeah, and there's so many different ways to do it now, too.
02:49:40.000
You know, it's like so many people found different avenues to make viral things.
02:49:45.000
Like, remember during the pandemic when Schultz had to turn your phone sideways thing?
02:49:49.000
He had a totally different style of comedy than he does, because he, you know, on stage, he'll let things cook.
02:49:56.000
He'll have long pauses, give you time to think about some ridiculous shit that he just said.
02:50:02.000
Right, but in these Instagram videos, sideways videos, he was very fast-paced.
02:50:10.000
And it's punchline after punchline after punchline.
02:50:13.000
He does the Netflix thing, you know, Schultz saves America.
02:50:39.000
And you learn just by seeing what is being propagated, how people's behaviors.
02:50:44.000
Even when I edit my stand-up, I take the air out.
02:50:47.000
If I get a laugh, I'll cut the laugh short just to get to the next part.
02:50:51.000
You're just competing against people's thumbs swiping up.
02:50:55.000
Sometimes, because you can make your joke a little tighter via editing.
02:51:03.000
Because if you're an unknown and you're just competing about people, you're competing with people swiping their thumb and watching something else.
02:51:17.000
And if it's below jazz in the listings, so be it.
02:51:24.000
It doesn't need any more attention than it gets.
02:51:31.000
Don't worry about who swipes and who doesn't swipe.
02:51:36.000
Do that thing and make it so that somebody's like, I like it.
02:51:44.000
I'm just very happy, especially after doing that last special.
02:51:48.000
I call this new one House Money because things are great with my parents and financially and career-wise.
02:52:05.000
Yeah, but I love them and I know what it was rooted in.
02:52:07.000
It was just rooted in their offspring wanting to do the best that they can.
02:52:15.000
Yeah, I think it allowed me to be where I'm at now.
02:52:22.000
There's something to be said for some uncomfortable shit that makes you work harder.
02:52:25.000
You know, because the worst situation is you're too comfortable and you don't work hard enough.
02:52:30.000
And then you don't have a career because you've just been lazy.
02:52:37.000
We know a lot of guys that just for whatever reason, they didn't Fucking put it together.
02:52:42.000
They didn't work as hard as everybody else did.
02:52:44.000
For whatever reason, they just fucking cashed out, you know?
02:52:51.000
Because you learned at an early age the value of hard work and discipline.
02:52:56.000
And I think a lot of people just don't know the value of that.
02:53:04.000
And stand-up comics are, you know, most of us are pretty indulgent and silly.
02:53:12.000
You've got to figure out a way to say, like, hey, I'm the boss of me.
02:53:16.000
I will sit my ass down and I will fucking work on this shit.
02:53:19.000
There's a level of entrepreneurship that I think is great about stand-up too.
02:53:23.000
And I think that's why I worked so hard is because I knew what my life would be like if I just stayed at Boeing.
02:53:29.000
It's not like I did engineering just so I can get a legit job and be able to move out to L.A. and drive up to Hollywood.
02:53:39.000
But I would always, when I'm in that cubicle, I knew what my life would be like if I just stayed at Boeing.
02:53:46.000
I knew what I wanted it to be, and that drove me.
02:53:49.000
Whereas, okay, I know this movie, I don't know this movie, and I love this.
02:54:01.000
And when you pursue something like that, it's exciting, it's fulfilling.
02:54:08.000
It's very exciting, but it's also very daunting, right?
02:54:12.000
God, I remember the early days where I wasn't sure if I was going to make it.
02:54:15.000
It was just whether I was going to be able to make a living.
02:54:24.000
You know, you don't know the next set you have where you bomb.
02:54:32.000
Those are the best moments when I was young, when I was starting out was after bombs.
02:54:41.000
It sucks, but you either get better or you quit.
02:54:45.000
I always think about that whenever people get into stand-up.
02:54:48.000
If they bomb and they don't love stand-up, they're out pretty fast.
02:55:09.000
And, you know, people used to say, like, I think Bill Cosby used to say, there's no bad crowd, just bad comedians.
02:55:16.000
And I used to say about that, he never had to work the places that I had to work.
02:55:19.000
I had to work bars in the middle of Massachusetts and Rhode Island and fucking Connecticut.
02:55:29.000
But through those bad audiences, you learn crowd control mitigation shit.
02:55:37.000
You learn how to capture people's attention so you don't let them drift off.
02:55:47.000
Also, if someone is being disruptive, do they have a good heart?
02:55:52.000
And kind of harness that back into your set and be playful.
02:55:55.000
Because some comics don't realize and they just go nuclear on the person.
02:56:01.000
Because then you've lost the goodwill of the crowd.
02:56:03.000
Everyone's like, yo, you just fucked this chick up.
02:56:06.000
And then you try to do a joke and they go, no, you're a monster, dude.
02:56:11.000
Like you're in the car and you're like, shut the fuck up!
02:56:13.000
You know, like, what the fuck are you doing, bro?
02:56:17.000
You're so amped up because you're already in a car and you're driving fast.
02:56:31.000
And you may have lost the crowd by saying you stupid bitch.
02:56:34.000
But then there's some people that you just have to address to get rid of them.
02:56:37.000
They're going to ruin your show no matter what you do.
02:56:41.000
Sometimes they're so malicious and mean that you have carte blanche to fucking lay into this guy.
02:56:45.000
And it's kind of fun because sometimes these people are so singular-minded and they think the world revolves around them.
02:56:51.000
When the crowd starts booing the person and you see that switch in their eyes like, oh, they've been perceiving the whole situation wrong.
02:56:59.000
They go, why is this entire room booing you if you're the good guy?
02:57:10.000
So I kind of like teaching a lesson sometimes when that happens.
02:57:14.000
This is fun for me to teach a grown man a lesson.
02:57:24.000
Well, some people just, they're drunk and they don't even realize what the consequences of what they're doing are.
02:57:31.000
They don't care about the other 300 people in the room.
02:57:34.000
But most of the time, they just, they mean well, but they've had a few drinks.
02:57:40.000
Booze is the best and the worst thing for comedy.
02:57:48.000
Yeah, you want people who can handle their liquor.
02:57:51.000
But every now and then you'll get, that's not true.
02:57:59.000
Well, you have to kick people out that are disrupting the show.
02:58:05.000
If you have live comedy, you're going to have people that are just hammered.
02:58:10.000
She went into a K-hole in the middle of the crowd.
02:58:16.000
They didn't know if she took an opiate or what she took.
02:58:37.000
Because a lot of people take this nasal spray of ketamine and they take it like as a therapist.
02:58:45.000
Quasi-dimensional traveling in the middle of a comedy show.
02:58:49.000
I don't understand when people go that hard and then pay tickets to an expensive show.
02:58:53.000
Like, some people will go to a concert and just be fucked up beyond belief.
02:59:02.000
You're not even mentally here to enjoy Beyonce or whatever it is.
02:59:08.000
Sometimes people say, I'm going to take an edible and go see a show.
02:59:12.000
Like that lady on K, I don't know if she was really processing the jokes, right?
02:59:24.000
I don't know what happens, but the way they do it, if you do a lot of it, you go into what they call a K-hole.
02:59:32.000
But I know that people have like hallucinations and they have like these weird experiences where they're interacting with interdimensional beings.
02:59:39.000
They're in empty apartment buildings and space and shit.
02:59:50.000
It seems like one that you could be out in the town on that stuff.
03:00:03.000
They used to have a ketamine drip thing that Neil did.
03:00:07.000
Yeah, he said he thought that he would go to a doctor's office and it would be like mild.
03:00:11.000
He's like, no, I'm tripping balls at the doctor's office on an IV drip of ketamine.
03:00:21.000
Yeah, I remember when he was going through a phase of trying different things for depression.
03:00:24.000
He showed me a video of the magnet thing, and then K, I guess, and then ayahuasca.
03:00:32.000
I didn't know that you could do ayahuasca that frequently.
03:01:07.000
And if you try, it'll take you down a very bad road.
03:01:14.000
Ari Shafir was, because Ari was living in LA at the time.
03:01:24.000
If he starts wearing wooden beads, I'm going to strangle him.
03:01:28.000
As soon as you do too much ayahuasca, you start wearing wooden beads, I'm always like, bro.
03:01:47.000
I haven't had people that I want to do it with.
03:01:54.000
Either you do it illegally here or you go somewhere else.
03:01:57.000
But also, maybe you should know who the fuck is making it and how they're doing it.
03:02:09.000
I saw a guy take a hit from a DMT pen at a party, and it was like unsettling to watch him, because you just see him blast off in a chair.
03:02:19.000
It's almost like seeing a guy jerk off or something.
03:02:22.000
He just blasts off for like five minutes, and you see it like, okay.
03:02:35.000
I know that sounds completely insane, especially from the host of Fear Factor.
03:02:42.000
I mean, they know that your brain produces those chemicals.
03:02:44.000
Why would your brain produce chemicals that let you interact with beings and other dimensions that are giving you wisdom?
03:02:54.000
But the speculation is that your brain makes it when it thinks it's going to die.
03:02:57.000
And that when you interact with that dimension, that's your spirit.
03:03:03.000
That's the essence of you, not your physical being and your life experiences and your memories.
03:03:15.000
Some people say you can access it through kundalini yoga.
03:03:18.000
I've never done it that way, but I have done what they call holotropic breathing.
03:03:23.000
I've had psychedelic experiences just from breathing.
03:03:40.000
Like, when people have near-death experiences, it sounds a lot like a psychedelic trip.
03:03:46.000
Like, a lot of these people that go to the light and then come back, like, they die for, like, 30 seconds and then they come back and they have this crazy experience of interacting with beings and interacting with angels and interacting with devils and weird shit,
03:04:06.000
And they've tried to map out what the fuck is happening with the human mind while that's going on, but it's just a lot of speculation in terms of...
03:04:13.000
They didn't even know what part of the brain is producing this chemical.
03:04:18.000
They knew it's produced by the liver, and I think it's produced by the lungs, but they think it's produced by the whole brain now.
03:04:25.000
Isn't that what Strassman said the last time he was here?
03:04:29.000
But your brain makes the most potent psychedelic drug known to man.
03:04:33.000
That's one of the reasons why that stuff is such a short, like the time that you're, if you take DMT, your body brings it back to baseline very quickly.
03:04:43.000
You're blasted for 10-15 minutes and then you're back.
03:04:57.000
You had one of the most insane experiences you could ever possibly imagine.
03:05:01.000
You remember little snippets of it, just like a dream.
03:05:08.000
And that is like a function of that same thing that when you take the actual chemical, when you take the actual DMT molecule, it's the same thing that happens.
03:05:31.000
I'll talk to a buddy and he'll bring up an event from six years ago and I don't work that way.
03:05:38.000
Some people just have super memories like that.
03:05:42.000
You know, I'd always wonder, like, do they have less experiences in their life?
03:05:46.000
So is that, like, more memorable because they don't have anything that stands out from the norm?
03:05:50.000
I think just the way their brain processes information and events, like it has a better filing system or something...
03:05:56.000
Well, some people definitely have photographic memories.
03:05:58.000
Like, they can remember everything absolutely perfectly.
03:06:04.000
I was just thinking about that 60 Minutes piece that she was on there talking about.
03:06:09.000
Like, she's one of these people with super memory.
03:06:14.000
Even people who can remember lines very easily, I'm so jealous of.
03:06:19.000
Because what a leg up you have over the competition if you could just read a thing and be like, got it.
03:06:30.000
A rare condition identified in only 100 people worldwide.
03:06:33.000
This trait drives her to advocate for more funding for brain research.
03:06:40.000
But when you hear her, like, recite things that she can remember, it's bananas.
03:06:45.000
But that would be an amazing advantage to be an actor.
03:06:51.000
I know exactly what you're going to say, and then I know exactly what I'm going to say.
03:07:25.000
He was in The Sound of Music or The Sound of Metal.
03:07:30.000
But he's a super talented actor, and I heard he runs while he does his lines and just to get himself out of his...
03:07:42.000
How crazy is it that they went after him for communism?
03:07:45.000
How crazy is it that they went after him for communism?
03:07:48.000
Well, that's what they were going after him for.
03:07:53.000
Yeah, but I mean, the guy who invented the fucking bomb.
03:08:00.000
What if the movie ended after they dropped the bomb and everyone cheers?
03:08:06.000
Yeah, but you saw they had to do that back end where he felt bad and shit.
03:08:14.000
Is the Oppenheimer video of him describing what he said when the first bomb went off.
03:08:36.000
It's for free and Fahim Anwar on Instagram and all the other social media platforms and always the Comedy Store.
03:09:06.000
I remembered the line from the Hindu scripture, the Bhagavad Gita.
03:09:15.000
Vishnu is trying to persuade the prince that he should do his duty and to impress him takes on his multi-armed form and says,
03:09:48.000
Somebody put some hip-hop beat underneath that.