The Joe Rogan Experience - April 23, 2024


Joe Rogan Experience #2139 - Akaash Singh


Episode Stats

Length

2 hours and 45 minutes

Words per Minute

206.61772

Word Count

34,240

Sentence Count

3,889

Misogynist Sentences

60

Hate Speech Sentences

45


Summary

This week, we talk about the Phish concert in Las Vegas, Dana White, the UFC, and the UFC in general. We also talk about how much money the UFC is making and what it means for the future of the sport. We also get into the UFC and Dana's new deal with the UFC. And we talk a little bit about the new Phish album and how it's going to affect the music and the music history of the band. We wrap up the episode with some listener questions and some listener mail. If you have any questions or suggestions for us or just want to say hi, tweet us or and we'll get right to it! Timestamps: 0:00:00 - Dana White's UFC deal 6:50 - How much money is the UFC making? 9:30 - Who's getting the most out of the UFC deal? 11:40 - Phish's new music 16:15 - What's the best seat in the house? 17:20 - What are the best seats in the stadium? 18:10 - Is Max Holloway knocking you out with two seconds left in the fight? 19:30 22:00 27:00- Who's the craziest person in the UFC? 26:30- What's your favorite thing about the UFC?? 29:20 32:00 -- Who is your favorite UFC fighter? 31:30 -- What do you'd like to see at UFC in September? 36:00 | Who's your best friend? 37:30 | What are you looking forward to watch? 39:00 // 40:00 + 39:40 41:00 & 45:00 What s your favorite part? 45:10 46:00 Can you tell me what you're most excited about? 47:30 + 47:00 And so much more? 48:30 // 45:40 + 48:00 How do you think you're going to get it back from this episode? Theme song by Ian Dorsch? Music by Ian McLeod_ Theme by Theme Song by ? 5th Grade Music by , & Music Credit by by . (music by ) & (c) by ( ) is by & ( )


Transcript

00:00:12.000 So Jamie, I'm sending you these things right now.
00:00:15.000 You want to feel like a lazy piece of shit?
00:00:16.000 Uh, yeah.
00:00:19.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:00:20.000 This is what me and Ari were sending each other last night.
00:00:23.000 This is all the Phish concert at the Sphere.
00:00:26.000 Oh, Phish is a fascinating thing.
00:00:29.000 Dude, the graph, you know the Sphere in Vegas?
00:00:32.000 Yes.
00:00:32.000 That giant globe.
00:00:33.000 Yes.
00:00:33.000 The whole ceiling is all LCD or LED. What kind of screen is it?
00:00:40.000 LED? LED. Whatever the best shit is.
00:00:43.000 Yeah.
00:00:43.000 It's like a billion dollar building.
00:00:45.000 Yeah.
00:00:45.000 But the screens on the ceiling, so Phish utilizes these for all these like crazy, trippy, psychedelic images.
00:00:54.000 And so while the show was going on, people were just like, it's like the greatest fucking thing I've ever seen in my life.
00:01:00.000 Look at this.
00:01:01.000 That's the ceiling.
00:01:02.000 Awesome.
00:01:03.000 That's the ceiling.
00:01:04.000 Oh, that's great.
00:01:06.000 It's incredible.
00:01:07.000 And then going to that show?
00:01:08.000 What a party!
00:01:09.000 I mean, they're doing a residency, so I guess they're doing six Sphere shows.
00:01:15.000 Check out some of the other ones I sent you, Jamie, because...
00:01:18.000 I sent you quite a few.
00:01:20.000 They're all different.
00:01:21.000 One of them was a dog.
00:01:22.000 A dog's like licking.
00:01:24.000 Like licking the screen.
00:01:26.000 I need to see this.
00:01:26.000 I did not know how big Fish was.
00:01:28.000 I didn't know it was big at all.
00:01:30.000 But they have such a massive cult following.
00:01:32.000 They do.
00:01:33.000 They sell out everywhere.
00:01:34.000 Yeah.
00:01:35.000 It's like the dead.
00:01:36.000 It's basically the same.
00:01:37.000 It's like a new generation of the Grateful Dead.
00:01:39.000 And growing up, I was aware of the Grateful Dead.
00:01:42.000 Fish, I was doing a show in Atlantic City, and then the guy that was booking was like, I don't know, man, it's tough.
00:01:47.000 Fish is here this weekend.
00:01:48.000 The whole city's...
00:01:48.000 And I was like, what?
00:01:49.000 Fish?
00:01:50.000 P, the one with the fish?
00:01:51.000 P-H? Fish?
00:01:53.000 And he was like, yeah, they're huge.
00:01:54.000 And then people follow them.
00:01:56.000 I had a buddy of mine, his girlfriend was really into fish.
00:01:59.000 I just didn't get it.
00:02:01.000 Yeah, I've never heard a single song.
00:02:02.000 I was like, what are you talking about?
00:02:03.000 Like, what's the big deal?
00:02:04.000 Like, look at this one.
00:02:05.000 Holy shit.
00:02:06.000 Isn't this insane?
00:02:07.000 That's awesome.
00:02:08.000 It's insane.
00:02:14.000 Now, even hearing this in the headphones, that feels awesome.
00:02:17.000 Looking on this screen.
00:02:18.000 Yeah, and apparently there's not a bad seat in the house.
00:02:22.000 And one of the guys from Phish was doing an interview about it, and he was saying, essentially, like, every seat is incredible.
00:02:28.000 Because every seat, you see the sky, and you see this.
00:02:32.000 You see fireworks, and it's just fucking amazing.
00:02:37.000 This is awesome.
00:02:38.000 So they're doing a UFC there in September.
00:02:42.000 And I have no...
00:02:43.000 Look at the dog.
00:02:44.000 Oh, that's so sick, dude.
00:02:46.000 That's so sick.
00:02:47.000 Isn't that amazing?
00:02:48.000 Yeah.
00:02:50.000 What's going to be on the screen at US 300 is Max Holloway knocking you out with two seconds left in the fight?
00:02:55.000 One second.
00:02:55.000 Yeah, one second.
00:02:56.000 Yeah, it's going to be all kinds of shit.
00:02:59.000 I mean, they're essentially planning for that different than they've ever planned for any other event.
00:03:04.000 Dana told me they've already spent $9 million preparing for September's event.
00:03:08.000 That's so sick.
00:03:10.000 So tickets are going to be nuts for that, I assume.
00:03:11.000 It's going to be nuts, yeah.
00:03:12.000 It's going to be a nutty event.
00:03:13.000 I don't think they're going to do more than one of them.
00:03:15.000 I think they're only going to do one.
00:03:17.000 Because the idea is that it's so expensive to do and there's so much involved in preparing for it.
00:03:22.000 But it's an investment, so you're going to get it back.
00:03:25.000 Has anybody written a book on Dana building the UFC? You would know.
00:03:27.000 I would not.
00:03:28.000 I'm very much casual.
00:03:29.000 But just, I remember being like 13, seeing the UFC commercials.
00:03:33.000 And it didn't, it seemed like this fringe thing.
00:03:35.000 And now it's this massive mainstream thing.
00:03:38.000 And I don't want to give all the credit to one person, but it seems like he's the one.
00:03:41.000 A lot of it.
00:03:41.000 A lot of it goes to him.
00:03:42.000 Yeah.
00:03:43.000 If it wasn't for him, it just wouldn't be the same thing.
00:03:45.000 You have to have a maniac rather than that organization.
00:03:48.000 He's a maniac.
00:03:49.000 He's a maniac, but a genius maniac.
00:03:51.000 Yeah.
00:03:51.000 Oh, yeah.
00:03:52.000 He's literally born for that job.
00:03:54.000 Yeah.
00:03:54.000 It's perfect.
00:03:55.000 He's the perfect guy for that job.
00:03:57.000 My cameraman was telling me this morning, Kevin shouts to Kevin, he films and edits all my stuff, but he's a big UFC fan.
00:04:02.000 He said Dana put out like a three-minute video after UFC 300 of a bunch of people criticizing the fight card on UFC 300. And I was like, dude, that's the thing that you need.
00:04:11.000 Michael Jordan has that thing.
00:04:12.000 Dana White has that thing.
00:04:13.000 Dave Portnoy has that thing where it's like, I remember everybody that ever insulted me.
00:04:18.000 Fuck you.
00:04:18.000 No matter how famous I get, fuck you.
00:04:20.000 Yeah.
00:04:21.000 I don't have that.
00:04:22.000 I don't either.
00:04:23.000 I keep moving.
00:04:24.000 I don't like that kind of stress in my life.
00:04:27.000 I don't like dwelling on things.
00:04:29.000 I don't like creating additional conflict.
00:04:31.000 Maybe I did when I was younger, but...
00:04:33.000 That shit doesn't seem appealing to me at all.
00:04:35.000 How do you let go?
00:04:36.000 If you had it when you were younger, how did you let go of it?
00:04:38.000 I just realized it wasn't helping me.
00:04:40.000 Yeah.
00:04:40.000 The same way I let go being jealous of people.
00:04:42.000 I would be jealous of other comedians, like if they were killing it.
00:04:45.000 Yeah.
00:04:45.000 I would be like, God, I hope he bombs.
00:04:47.000 Yeah.
00:04:47.000 And then I, this is when I was 21, I felt this.
00:04:50.000 Oh, that's very young for that.
00:04:51.000 And I saw it, I was like, God, what a weak thought.
00:04:54.000 Yeah.
00:04:54.000 I was embarrassed.
00:04:55.000 Yeah.
00:04:56.000 I remember being 27 and just being so angry, and I haven't let go of all of it by any stretch, but being like, I don't like me being like this.
00:05:02.000 Yeah.
00:05:03.000 And then I realize all my hate of other people is rooted in me worrying I'm not going to make it or worrying I'm not funny enough.
00:05:08.000 And then you get kind of like, that's embarrassing, so let's try to move away from that.
00:05:12.000 Yeah.
00:05:13.000 Especially with comedy and something that you can actually improve on, it's really stupid.
00:05:18.000 Or even martial arts, something you can improve on.
00:05:21.000 I get it with girls.
00:05:23.000 Because they get it with looks.
00:05:25.000 Like, looks.
00:05:26.000 Oh, they're saying it.
00:05:27.000 Okay.
00:05:27.000 No, looks is a fucking terrible...
00:05:30.000 What a crazy crapshoot.
00:05:33.000 Yeah.
00:05:34.000 You could just get two sixes.
00:05:35.000 Yeah.
00:05:36.000 Or you could get two ones.
00:05:37.000 Yeah.
00:05:38.000 And there's not a goddamn thing you can do about it.
00:05:40.000 You just got fucked by genetics.
00:05:43.000 And it's because men don't give a fuck about your personality.
00:05:46.000 They barely care.
00:05:48.000 Yeah, it's...
00:05:49.000 As long as you're nice enough...
00:05:50.000 Yeah.
00:05:51.000 You're nice and smiley and friendly.
00:05:53.000 Be there.
00:05:53.000 Don't stop the fun.
00:05:54.000 People are like, she's great.
00:05:55.000 Yeah.
00:05:56.000 She's awesome.
00:05:57.000 She was quiet.
00:05:58.000 We're such losers, dude.
00:06:00.000 She was not interrupting me when I was talking.
00:06:02.000 She's awesome.
00:06:04.000 Yeah, dude.
00:06:04.000 It's all genetics.
00:06:05.000 Yeah.
00:06:06.000 It's all just...
00:06:06.000 We're looking for those features.
00:06:09.000 Yeah.
00:06:09.000 We're looking for symmetry and all kinds of different things.
00:06:12.000 And it's just...
00:06:12.000 The world is a rough place if it's just a looks thing.
00:06:16.000 Yeah.
00:06:16.000 But if it's a performance thing...
00:06:18.000 Goddammit, it's the opposite.
00:06:20.000 Like, you should be excited by someone who's better than you.
00:06:22.000 Yeah.
00:06:22.000 Because that gives you something to strive for, and it also gives you fuel.
00:06:27.000 Yeah, absolutely.
00:06:28.000 And I've said this publicly, I think, on True Jordy's podcast, but watching Andrew blow up, there's times where I'm insecure, and I'm like, oh, am I going to get there?
00:06:35.000 But then watching him handle all of it, I'm like, oh, that is such a blessing to be able to watch him handle everything.
00:06:42.000 So if and when I get to that position, this is how you handle it.
00:06:45.000 I've seen it done before.
00:06:46.000 Yes, that's important.
00:06:47.000 That's important to learn how to just be yourself.
00:06:51.000 Stay yourself.
00:06:51.000 You have to learn how to stay yourself because the pressures are different.
00:06:55.000 It's like you step into a different atmosphere.
00:06:58.000 It's like a different environment.
00:07:00.000 You're on a different planet.
00:07:01.000 The gravity is different.
00:07:03.000 As the number of eyeballs increase, every feeling you have about these groups of people with an opinion amplifies as their numbers amplify.
00:07:10.000 Yes.
00:07:11.000 So if you're hung up on other people's opinions, and then you blow up, you're in real trouble.
00:07:16.000 Because if you read all that stuff, you can go crazy.
00:07:19.000 And we've all seen it.
00:07:19.000 We've all seen guys who go crazy.
00:07:22.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:07:22.000 Just like the pressure and the other people and the opinions and all that stuff, it cracks them.
00:07:27.000 I remember when you came on Flagrant, you were like, I'm sure there's stuff that's negative about me.
00:07:30.000 I just don't read it.
00:07:31.000 And then that actually helped me because I was like, oh, if Joe Rogan doesn't, the most famous guy I know doesn't read the comments, I thought there was like something weak and you needed to like train yourself to get used to negative.
00:07:42.000 It was like a really stupid thought.
00:07:43.000 But it's like that you could just not do it.
00:07:45.000 And then those people aren't.
00:07:47.000 If you're a nice person, you want to have nice exchanges with people.
00:07:53.000 I'm a nice guy.
00:07:54.000 I like to be friendly.
00:07:55.000 I like meeting people and hugging them.
00:07:57.000 I like fun times.
00:07:59.000 I don't like arguments.
00:08:01.000 So if I'm engaging with people who are troubled, mentally ill people that are just looking to shit on people, then you get all that energy in your head.
00:08:12.000 I wouldn't gravitate towards that energy in real life.
00:08:14.000 Why would I gravitate towards that energy online?
00:08:17.000 This is not good for you.
00:08:19.000 So if you pretend that you don't care at all, well now you're pretending, okay?
00:08:25.000 Now you're not a human anymore.
00:08:27.000 Because all humans care about other people's opinions.
00:08:29.000 It's a part of why we all survived.
00:08:35.000 Our tribes manage to move into cities and create agriculture and create civilization.
00:08:41.000 You have to like each other.
00:08:43.000 You get along.
00:08:44.000 It's part of the deal of being a human being.
00:08:46.000 And if you try to pretend, I don't give a fuck.
00:08:51.000 Well, now you're lying.
00:08:52.000 It's a coping mechanism.
00:08:53.000 Now you're lying.
00:08:54.000 You just got to be honest about who you are.
00:08:57.000 You're a human being.
00:08:58.000 And if you're a human being, what do you want?
00:09:00.000 You want good interactions with people.
00:09:02.000 My wife said a thing.
00:09:03.000 I was getting in my head a couple times that she says a thing.
00:09:05.000 She's like, let me ask you a question.
00:09:06.000 Have you ever gone to a content creator's page and left a negative comment?
00:09:09.000 And I was like, I don't think so.
00:09:11.000 And I love hating on things.
00:09:12.000 But going on to someone's page, and then she's like, now imagine doing it incessantly.
00:09:17.000 All day long.
00:09:18.000 Those people have some level of mental illness.
00:09:20.000 Their life is based around hating someone else.
00:09:23.000 You can't take those people that seriously.
00:09:25.000 And I was like, ah, that's a valid point.
00:09:26.000 They might dislike me, but that level is weird.
00:09:28.000 Yeah, they're losers.
00:09:29.000 It's a bandwidth issue.
00:09:30.000 And I don't mean they're losers like they can't be winners.
00:09:33.000 I mean like what you're doing, you're engaging in loser behavior.
00:09:38.000 I've engaged in loser behavior before.
00:09:39.000 I've been a loser.
00:09:41.000 Doesn't mean you are like, this is a can.
00:09:44.000 You are a can.
00:09:45.000 You never change.
00:09:46.000 This is never going to be a plant.
00:09:47.000 It is what it is.
00:09:49.000 That's not what I mean.
00:09:50.000 But I mean that if you're acting like a loser, if it walks like a duck, you're a fucking duck.
00:09:55.000 You're a loser.
00:09:56.000 And if you're a guy that's going on...
00:09:59.000 You think Michael Jordan's leaving negative YouTube comments?
00:10:01.000 You know what I'm saying?
00:10:03.000 People that are successful don't have time to try to take other people down for no reason.
00:10:08.000 Unless you're Cat Williams.
00:10:09.000 Yeah, but he's great at it, though.
00:10:11.000 He's so good at it, though.
00:10:12.000 If you're not that good at it, don't do it.
00:10:14.000 But also, he's being accurate.
00:10:16.000 The thing about Kat is, like, you can't refute the things he's saying, other than the book thing.
00:10:22.000 There's no way he reads that many books.
00:10:23.000 His 40 is impressive.
00:10:25.000 It's not as fast as he said, but it's impressive.
00:10:26.000 Oh, he's fine.
00:10:28.000 He ran the 40 in, like, 5 flat.
00:10:29.000 Have you seen that clip?
00:10:30.000 Yes.
00:10:30.000 Crazy.
00:10:31.000 He's fast.
00:10:32.000 Yeah.
00:10:32.000 He's fast, man.
00:10:33.000 And he's cool.
00:10:34.000 He's a fun dude.
00:10:35.000 Hey, I have some loser behavior to apologize for before we get...
00:10:38.000 Really?
00:10:38.000 Yeah.
00:10:39.000 Yesterday, I'm walking through Austin, and I'm like, this city's great.
00:10:42.000 Why did I get unrogan the first time and shit all over Austin?
00:10:45.000 What a fantastic city!
00:10:46.000 I'm a loser!
00:10:48.000 68 degrees on a Sunday, I'm walking around, there's trees, there's beautiful people, there's good food, and I realized the only reason I hated it is because I would leave Texas when I moved to New York or LA, and every hacky liberal would be like, oh, I hate Texas, but I like Austin.
00:11:01.000 And then I got insecure and some loser shit, and I was like, you know what?
00:11:04.000 Fuck Austin, dude.
00:11:05.000 Fucking vegans, they suck.
00:11:07.000 This city's great.
00:11:08.000 Well, if you go to certain parts of Austin, you will get annoyed.
00:11:11.000 I was in East Austin a couple months ago and I saw some fucking guy driving his Tesla with a mask on.
00:11:17.000 I literally wanted to yank him out of his car and break his neck.
00:11:22.000 You fucking...
00:11:22.000 You're a problem voting.
00:11:24.000 I guarantee you, you're a problem.
00:11:27.000 Oh my god.
00:11:28.000 You're the reason why there's no cash bail.
00:11:30.000 Dude, I saw a guy in 2022 in an elevator and he got mad at me for not having a mask on.
00:11:34.000 I was like, buddy, it's over.
00:11:35.000 It's over.
00:11:36.000 He got mad at you in 2022?
00:11:37.000 He was like, not wearing a mask?
00:11:38.000 Because New York had the whole mask thing for longer.
00:11:41.000 And so I guess...
00:11:42.000 But to me, once it...
00:11:43.000 Was it still going on in 2022 when you got in the elevator?
00:11:46.000 I don't know.
00:11:46.000 Yes.
00:11:47.000 Well, my wife, NYU, she got a master's at NYU, and they made them take boosters, which I took the vax.
00:11:52.000 I'm fine with that, but boosters, I was like, I'm not doing it.
00:11:54.000 If it's a cold, I'm not vaccinating against a cold.
00:11:57.000 I'm not doing it.
00:11:58.000 And then they made them wear masks until, I think, middle of 2023, they had to wear masks.
00:12:03.000 Jesus Christ.
00:12:04.000 Which is insane.
00:12:05.000 There's no science.
00:12:06.000 Zero science.
00:12:07.000 Yes.
00:12:08.000 If you look at the science behind masking, there's actually legitimate science that breathing those dirty fucking masks with that bacteria inches from your mouth is bad.
00:12:17.000 That's fair.
00:12:18.000 Yeah, because you're spitting in this thing, and then this thing is right in front of you, and it's also warm and moist, and so it breeds bacteria.
00:12:26.000 Like a surgeon wears masks to protect someone whose body is cut open.
00:12:29.000 That makes sense.
00:12:30.000 You don't spit inside of them.
00:12:31.000 He's not talking, having full conversations.
00:12:33.000 He breathes in it for the surgery, takes it off, that's it.
00:12:35.000 Another mask or whatever.
00:12:36.000 And if you wear one of those tight-fitting N95, or whatever they call them, is that what it is?
00:12:40.000 Yeah, N95. KN95 and N95, yeah.
00:12:42.000 If you wear one of those, like, even that is, you're getting air in, okay?
00:12:47.000 And you must understand that the particles of whatever virus it is are smaller than the fucking holes that you're getting air through.
00:12:55.000 You could vape through those things.
00:12:58.000 Have you ever seen people vape through them?
00:13:00.000 No.
00:13:00.000 Yeah, fucking vape goes everywhere.
00:13:02.000 There's a doctor that was showing that early on.
00:13:05.000 He was a respiratory specialist.
00:13:07.000 He was like, this is insane.
00:13:08.000 And let me show you why it's insane.
00:13:10.000 So he takes up, you know, one of those big juice box vapes that those dorks use?
00:13:14.000 At least they suck it on a robot dick.
00:13:17.000 So he takes this big puff and then blows right through one of them surgical masks.
00:13:23.000 Wow, okay.
00:13:24.000 So the COVID particles are smaller than the vape particles.
00:13:28.000 Yeah.
00:13:28.000 It's nonsense, but it made people feel better.
00:13:30.000 I wore them in the beginning because, you know, it's like you don't want to be an asshole.
00:13:34.000 Everybody's scared.
00:13:35.000 You don't want people upset.
00:13:36.000 Oh, there's no mask.
00:13:38.000 Yeah.
00:13:38.000 And early on, I'm with you.
00:13:40.000 I get it.
00:13:41.000 We didn't know what the fuck this was.
00:13:42.000 We didn't know how to control it.
00:13:43.000 So this is what we feel we need to do.
00:13:45.000 And then as more info started coming out, we should start to get less hysterical about it because there's more info on it.
00:13:50.000 And it felt like in New York, we didn't.
00:13:52.000 I thought some places went so far the other way.
00:13:53.000 It was a little nuts, but it was more fun.
00:13:55.000 It's liberals.
00:13:55.000 It's liberals.
00:13:56.000 And this is coming from someone who's been mostly a liberal their whole life with most issues.
00:14:01.000 I'm liberal about pretty much everything until it gets to like border and guns.
00:14:06.000 I know violence.
00:14:08.000 I understand reality.
00:14:10.000 Crime is real.
00:14:11.000 It's a real thing.
00:14:12.000 This idea that you shouldn't be protected is fucking nuts, especially when you're defunding the police, you fucking idiot.
00:14:17.000 Yeah, that was crazy.
00:14:18.000 Yeah, that was crazy.
00:14:19.000 Yeah, you know what?
00:14:21.000 I have a bit in the special where I talk about just, like, the marketing of it.
00:14:24.000 Like, defund the police.
00:14:25.000 I don't...
00:14:26.000 When I talk to liberal people about what that means, they would be like, yeah, you know, I just want to, like, specialize the police force and have less, like, have de-escalation measures first, blah, blah, blah.
00:14:34.000 And I'm like, well, that's...
00:14:35.000 Specialize the police is a lot better than defund the police, you maniac.
00:14:40.000 What terrible marketing.
00:14:41.000 What they have to do is train the police better and make...
00:14:43.000 Improve the police.
00:14:44.000 Yeah, and give those folks mushrooms every now and again and let them cleanse.
00:14:49.000 You...
00:14:49.000 Because of you, I started smoking weed a little bit.
00:14:51.000 It's great.
00:14:52.000 I gotcha!
00:14:53.000 I gotcha on that podcast that day.
00:14:54.000 You got me on the podcast that day.
00:14:56.000 And, buddy, let me tell you, shrooms even better.
00:15:00.000 Yes.
00:15:00.000 I'm so glad I waited until I was 37 to do any of this.
00:15:03.000 I don't think I could have handled it when I was a kid.
00:15:04.000 That's smart.
00:15:04.000 That's actually smart.
00:15:05.000 But shrooms are the best.
00:15:07.000 Oh, when you were showing me that fish thing, all I was thinking about is I'm going to get shrooms, tickets to a fish show, sit there and lose my mind.
00:15:13.000 Ari Shavir is trying to convince me to go to a makeup specialist and get a prosthetic nose and chin.
00:15:18.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:15:19.000 You gotta.
00:15:20.000 Put a wig on, maybe.
00:15:21.000 Maybe get a wig.
00:15:22.000 Shrooms before?
00:15:23.000 Yeah.
00:15:23.000 How to block.
00:15:24.000 Not a blonde one.
00:15:25.000 People will know.
00:15:26.000 Yeah, maybe a redhead.
00:15:27.000 Maybe I'll be a redhead.
00:15:28.000 And some baggy clothes or something like that.
00:15:31.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:15:32.000 Something to hide the guns.
00:15:37.000 Just my tattoos, if anybody identifies those.
00:15:41.000 If you're going to go to a Phish concert, you have to just be one with the crowd.
00:15:46.000 You can't do that if you're famous.
00:15:48.000 Oh, interesting.
00:15:49.000 You've got to be able to sneak in and just take it in.
00:15:52.000 Wow.
00:15:53.000 Dude, we could just run out the sphere.
00:15:55.000 Let's just do a private concert with Phish for you and your friends.
00:16:00.000 Dude, I am obsessed with AI animation.
00:16:04.000 I'm obsessed with it.
00:16:05.000 I follow like 15 different people online now on Instagram.
00:16:10.000 It'll come across my feed and I'll just find these insane videos that they're creating instantly with AI and they're beautiful.
00:16:18.000 Yeah, it's insane.
00:16:19.000 They're amazing.
00:16:20.000 We made songs with AI on one of the Patreon episodes, and they're so good.
00:16:24.000 So good.
00:16:26.000 20 seconds.
00:16:26.000 It's unbelievable.
00:16:27.000 It's crazy.
00:16:27.000 Have you seen the rap beefs that are happening where they think the songs are AI? Because they're so, like, one guy said, I know this song isn't AI because how can AI take a breath in a song?
00:16:37.000 And I was like, because it's AI. It's just going to get better and better.
00:16:41.000 No, they um, they take breaths, they do all kinds of stuff now.
00:16:44.000 They mimic all the patterns of speech that they can record from all these different people.
00:16:49.000 So if you have a database, like say you and I, we've been on a bunch of podcasts now, so they could take us and have us say anything, and it would be like weird pauses and clearing of the throat.
00:17:03.000 It would be indistinguishable.
00:17:05.000 What is your...
00:17:06.000 What is this?
00:17:06.000 Drake takes aim at Kendrick Lamar with A.I. Tupac and Snoop Dogg vocals on TaylorMade Freestyle District.
00:17:12.000 So Drake and Kendrick Lamar are beefing.
00:17:14.000 Drake wrote a beef and he did A.I. Snoop and A.I. Tupac talking about how disappointed they are in Kendrick Lamar.
00:17:20.000 He wrote the raps and then the voices sound perfect.
00:17:22.000 Oh my god.
00:17:23.000 It's unbelievable what's happening.
00:17:25.000 What is wrong with Kendrick Lamar?
00:17:26.000 They're just beef.
00:17:27.000 This rap, it's competitive.
00:17:29.000 They beef sometimes.
00:17:29.000 I think Kendrick started this one, and then it's just like, who wants to be the best?
00:17:33.000 And hip-hop is rooted in this kind of battle rap and competitive spirit.
00:17:37.000 Well, hip-hop is an interesting thing, because I love hip-hop, but I don't really love bragging.
00:17:45.000 But I love hip-hop bragging.
00:17:47.000 Yeah, because it's performative.
00:17:48.000 You don't take it seriously.
00:17:50.000 Well, it's also...
00:17:52.000 You gotta put yourself in like Jay-Z in 99 Problems, you know, where he's rapping about all you sing about is cash money hoes.
00:18:04.000 Like if you grew up with holes in your zapatoes, you would, you know, that's the whole idea.
00:18:09.000 It's like if you come from nothing and then all of a sudden you got diamonds and you're driving a fucking Lamborghini.
00:18:16.000 It's supposed to be a celebration of the fact that you made it and it's part of the bragging.
00:18:20.000 I remember when my parents had money.
00:18:22.000 They had money, lost money, had money, lost money.
00:18:24.000 But the last time they had money, I was like, who needs all this stuff?
00:18:26.000 Then they lost money.
00:18:27.000 I started comedy.
00:18:28.000 I was broke as fuck.
00:18:29.000 Whole family's not making money.
00:18:30.000 And I was like, all I want to do is buy things when I get money.
00:18:32.000 I'm buying everything.
00:18:34.000 And then you buy a few things and you're like, I'm good.
00:18:36.000 I got a nice place to live.
00:18:37.000 I'm happy with my 2012 Honda Accord.
00:18:39.000 We're good.
00:18:40.000 The thing about expensive stuff is if you can't afford it, the stress of that not being or barely being able to afford it and working for it is not nearly worth what you get out of the thing.
00:18:52.000 The only time nice things are worth it is when they're kind of free.
00:18:56.000 Meaning, not that they're free, but that you don't feel it.
00:18:59.000 Like, if you went out and bought a new Mustang, you wouldn't even feel it if you're rich.
00:19:04.000 It's like, boo, I can enjoy this.
00:19:06.000 This is fun.
00:19:07.000 It's like, it doesn't affect your life.
00:19:09.000 But if you make $60,000 a year, and you go out and buy a new Mustang, and then you're looking at those car payments, and you're looking at your rent payment, and then you're looking at your bills, You're like fuck yeah, like maybe I should take on like a little uber thing on the side You know that's my Mustang.
00:19:25.000 Yeah, we wind up doing that to pay for a car Yeah, which is a great thing to do if you want to do it that way, but the the additional stress Like houses.
00:19:34.000 Like I always tell people this.
00:19:35.000 This is an important lesson that I learned when I was 27. When I was 27 was the first time I ever had a nice apartment.
00:19:42.000 I moved to Hollywood.
00:19:43.000 I was on a television show and I got this place in North Hollywood and it had a loft.
00:19:49.000 And I had a pool table in my living room.
00:19:51.000 I'm like, this is amazing.
00:19:53.000 This is the dream.
00:19:53.000 And I was sitting down, I didn't even have furniture yet, and I was dating this girl, and we were sitting down listening to Seal, you know, the Kiss by My Rose?
00:20:01.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:20:01.000 And we're listening to it, I had this dope-ass fucking stereo that I bought.
00:20:05.000 I never had a stereo.
00:20:06.000 Yeah.
00:20:06.000 And then, I mean, I may have bullshit stereos, but I never had a real stereo with the big speakers there.
00:20:11.000 Yeah.
00:20:11.000 And so we're listening to this.
00:20:13.000 This sound is like going all, it's bouncing off the walls and everything.
00:20:17.000 I'm like, this is incredible.
00:20:19.000 But then...
00:20:20.000 After a few months, I had this revelation.
00:20:23.000 I was like, oh, this is just home.
00:20:26.000 This is the same feeling I had in my shitty apartment in New York.
00:20:30.000 It's just home.
00:20:31.000 The high wears off.
00:20:32.000 Exactly.
00:20:33.000 My shitty apartment in New York, I had a television and a bed.
00:20:36.000 That's all I had.
00:20:38.000 All I had is a television and a bed and a pool cue.
00:20:41.000 And then I had, in the other room, I had a kitchen that I was fucking never in.
00:20:44.000 I just ate out every day.
00:20:46.000 Very rarely did I cook.
00:20:48.000 So it's like, that was home.
00:20:51.000 So I'd go there from the road, do a gig, plop my bags down.
00:20:57.000 Sit on the couch, turn on MTV, I'm home.
00:21:00.000 It's the same feeling.
00:21:01.000 The exact same feeling.
00:21:02.000 But if you gotta bust your ass and really kill yourself for this same feeling, it's not worth it, kids.
00:21:09.000 Your home feels like your home, no matter if it's a 50 million dollar mansion or a fucking condo that you're paying 600 bucks a month on.
00:21:16.000 It's the same thing.
00:21:17.000 My wife is big on the thing where if you can't afford it twice, you can't afford it once.
00:21:23.000 That's smart.
00:21:23.000 Yeah, so I'm very financially, I think just by product of being a comedian and like you risk everything, I don't have any risk aversion at all.
00:21:31.000 My wife is a little more risk averse.
00:21:33.000 So like if I want to buy a nice watch, I'm a little bit into watches now.
00:21:36.000 She's like, can you buy that twice?
00:21:38.000 I'm cool with you buying it.
00:21:39.000 Just make me feel better.
00:21:40.000 Can you buy it twice?
00:21:41.000 That's it.
00:21:42.000 That's all I want to know.
00:21:43.000 Can you buy it?
00:21:43.000 Did the watch thing's a thing?
00:21:45.000 That's a thing dudes get into.
00:21:46.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:21:48.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:21:48.000 And then you get into watches that people don't know are expensive, but they are expensive?
00:21:52.000 That's what I love now.
00:21:54.000 Because walking around New York, I'm a very robbable guy.
00:21:59.000 So walking around New York, I want something that's nice, and you're like, all right, fair enough.
00:22:03.000 I don't think that's that nice of a watch.
00:22:05.000 I'll let them walk.
00:22:06.000 Yeah.
00:22:06.000 So that's my jam now.
00:22:09.000 You've got to think like that if you're in certain spots.
00:22:11.000 Yeah.
00:22:11.000 Has New York gotten that bad?
00:22:13.000 So apparently, I looked this up, because Alex keeps up with this stuff, Alex on the podcast, and he was saying crime is down.
00:22:18.000 So I looked it up.
00:22:19.000 Murder is down like 15% from a year ago.
00:22:21.000 Rape is down like 4%.
00:22:22.000 I think assault might be up.
00:22:24.000 But yeah, you do feel- Here's a problem, though.
00:22:26.000 Under-reporting.
00:22:27.000 And one of the problems with under-reporting, when there's no police presence, and that's a thing in LA right now, robberies are so common, it's so bad.
00:22:36.000 The mayor of LA's house got broken into.
00:22:38.000 Really?
00:22:39.000 Yeah, the LA mayor.
00:22:40.000 Pull that up.
00:22:41.000 It just happened.
00:22:42.000 Wow.
00:22:42.000 It just happened yesterday.
00:22:44.000 They're so fucking common and cops aren't coming for anything that a lot of shit goes underreported.
00:22:50.000 Because if you call it in, no one does anything.
00:22:52.000 No one cares.
00:22:53.000 Los Angeles mayor Karen Bass safe after suspect breaks into her official residence.
00:22:59.000 That's crazy.
00:23:00.000 I like how she has an official residence.
00:23:01.000 Official residence is also wild.
00:23:02.000 Yeah, what's the unofficial?
00:23:03.000 Her and her family would not harm when a suspect gained entry.
00:23:06.000 I like how to say that.
00:23:07.000 Gained entry.
00:23:08.000 He gained access.
00:23:09.000 That's crazy.
00:23:09.000 He broke into your fucking house!
00:23:11.000 The Getty House, the LA Mayor's official residence on Irving Boulevard around 640 a.m.
00:23:15.000 this morning.
00:23:16.000 First of all, that's ridiculous.
00:23:17.000 That you have a place where everybody knows you're going to be because it's the mayor house.
00:23:22.000 Yeah.
00:23:22.000 You've got to stay in the mayor house.
00:23:24.000 Yeah, but no one should get in.
00:23:26.000 We all know where the president's staying.
00:23:27.000 We're not getting in.
00:23:28.000 I hung out with the governor when I first moved to Texas.
00:23:32.000 Oh, yeah.
00:23:32.000 And the governor lives in the governor's mansion.
00:23:35.000 And so you got to go to the governor's mansion.
00:23:37.000 You're going through all the security.
00:23:38.000 They're frisking you, taking stuff out of your pockets.
00:23:41.000 Yeah, of course.
00:23:42.000 Gops and everything.
00:23:43.000 I'm like, how crazy is it that you're staying in this spot where everybody knows where you are?
00:23:48.000 And then while I was hanging out with them, a drone flew over the balcony.
00:23:52.000 Get the fuck out of here.
00:23:53.000 It turned out it was the fire department.
00:23:54.000 They were doing something with drones, so they scan for fires and shit, and I don't know what they do.
00:24:00.000 But I was like, this is crazy.
00:24:02.000 Do you have to deal with this all the time?
00:24:03.000 Is a drone in front of your fucking house?
00:24:04.000 Yeah.
00:24:05.000 I'd get a shotgun.
00:24:06.000 Yeah, I remember watching a presidential debate.
00:24:08.000 It was Obama and Romney, I think, and then we're at the Village Lantern where we came up, and then my boy Michael Blaustein points to the TV and he goes, why would anyone want this?
00:24:16.000 And I was like, yo, that's a good point.
00:24:18.000 That, to leave my house?
00:24:21.000 Yeah.
00:24:22.000 Drones flying over my house.
00:24:24.000 A level of scrutiny.
00:24:24.000 Anytime I say, uh, people are jumping all...
00:24:26.000 Remember they were jumping on Barack because he said, uh, a lot?
00:24:29.000 Yeah.
00:24:29.000 They're just all over him.
00:24:30.000 It's like, dog, can I live?
00:24:32.000 Imagine that now.
00:24:33.000 You see how bad Biden isn't speaking?
00:24:36.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:24:36.000 It's rough, dude.
00:24:37.000 It's rough.
00:24:38.000 I got hairy legs!
00:24:41.000 It's so rough to watch.
00:24:43.000 It's so rough to watch.
00:24:44.000 Imagine if Obama came along and ummed and people complained about that.
00:24:47.000 Yeah, that's true.
00:24:48.000 Wait a minute.
00:24:48.000 How do you not complain about this guy?
00:24:49.000 That's true.
00:24:50.000 This is ridiculous.
00:24:51.000 Do you want...
00:24:52.000 I heard you say I think Michelle should run?
00:24:54.000 She could win.
00:24:55.000 She could win, I think.
00:24:56.000 I think if she won...
00:24:57.000 I think if she ran, she could win.
00:24:59.000 Yeah, I think...
00:24:59.000 I don't think she wants that, though.
00:25:00.000 No, I guess...
00:25:01.000 I don't think she wants that in her life.
00:25:02.000 Which is...
00:25:02.000 The bullshit that they dealt with over the eight years when he was president?
00:25:06.000 Yeah.
00:25:07.000 Fuck all that...
00:25:07.000 Fuck that job for anybody that...
00:25:09.000 You know that like really would be really good at it.
00:25:12.000 Yeah, I trust the person who doesn't want the job more than the person who wants the job.
00:25:15.000 I mean you have to be like real desperate to change the world.
00:25:18.000 Yeah.
00:25:19.000 And be a good person and actual good candidate to understand that they're gonna come for you.
00:25:24.000 Yeah.
00:25:24.000 Like the way they're coming for Trump right now.
00:25:26.000 Yeah.
00:25:27.000 This thing that they're doing right now with the criminal trial for the hush money payment, this is essentially, the way it is, it's like he incorrectly labeled a payment on, it's like a ledger thing.
00:25:43.000 It's not even like it's illegal to pay someone to shut up.
00:25:47.000 The whole thing is, it's like how he recorded what that payment was for.
00:25:52.000 I don't know enough about the trial to know.
00:25:55.000 But I think what a casual observer like myself would say is, oh, this seems like a witch hunt.
00:25:59.000 And I don't think if your strategy is to make Trump not win an election, I think that only emboldens his support.
00:26:05.000 People who are on the fence might be like, oh, they really are trying to get this guy.
00:26:08.000 He's right when he says all this stuff.
00:26:10.000 They're definitely trying to get him.
00:26:11.000 But if you look at what's going on in New York crime-wise, look at the bail situation.
00:26:16.000 Like those two guys that beat up the cops, the illegal immigrants that beat up the cops.
00:26:20.000 I didn't even know about this.
00:26:21.000 They let him out right away.
00:26:23.000 And the dude was like Tupac in the camera and shit.
00:26:26.000 I was kind of fired to be honest.
00:26:28.000 This is a young guy who walked here from Guatemala.
00:26:31.000 He's like, fuck you.
00:26:32.000 I just beat up your cop.
00:26:33.000 That guy is Scarface.
00:26:34.000 We watched a movie about that guy in the 70s and loved him.
00:26:37.000 Yeah, and you're never going to get that guy out of here now.
00:26:40.000 Even if you beat up a cop, you're not even deporting him, you're just letting him right back on the street.
00:26:44.000 And then how are you tracking him?
00:26:46.000 You're not tracking him.
00:26:47.000 Are you tracking him?
00:26:48.000 No, you're not tracking him.
00:26:49.000 There's no resources.
00:26:50.000 There's no fucking money for anything there.
00:26:52.000 It's crazy.
00:26:53.000 That's crazy.
00:26:53.000 I thought South Park had a really good take on illegal immigration like 15 years ago, which was like the liberals are all just like, let them in, let them in, let them in.
00:27:01.000 The conservatives are like, don't let any in.
00:27:02.000 And nobody's like, hey, maybe we could also just try to help them out in their country so they don't need to sneak in.
00:27:07.000 And that's probably a great way to do aid.
00:27:09.000 The problem with that is then you don't get the cheap labor that you need to make cars for like $10.
00:27:15.000 That's very true.
00:27:16.000 That's very true.
00:27:17.000 My parents owned a restaurant that failed.
00:27:18.000 But if you think we were hiring legal people, that's crazy.
00:27:21.000 That's crazy.
00:27:22.000 No chance.
00:27:23.000 We would have closed even faster.
00:27:25.000 That's the thing about LA. They just switched it to $20 an hour for minimum wage.
00:27:29.000 Yeah, there's no way you can afford that.
00:27:31.000 Businesses are just going to close up shop.
00:27:32.000 They're going to kill the economy.
00:27:33.000 Or just keep hiring illegals.
00:27:35.000 It's going to be one of those two.
00:27:36.000 Yeah, but you can't do it because they have to get paid a certain amount.
00:27:38.000 Even the illegals do.
00:27:39.000 Really?
00:27:39.000 Unless you're paying them under the table.
00:27:41.000 If you're running a McDonald's, you can't pay people under the table.
00:27:44.000 They'll get you.
00:27:45.000 But they're also just going to do the self-checkout and just eliminate workforce wherever they can.
00:27:49.000 That's what's going to happen.
00:27:50.000 It's going to be an AI thing.
00:27:52.000 It's going to be self-check.
00:27:53.000 They already have a thing here.
00:27:54.000 There's a Whataburger that's like a digital Whataburger.
00:27:57.000 You order it on your app and then you pull up to a kiosk and it just fucking comes out.
00:28:02.000 Yeah.
00:28:02.000 All right.
00:28:03.000 Yeah, we're always going to get used to it.
00:28:04.000 The self-checkout doesn't seem weird anymore.
00:28:06.000 Not at all.
00:28:07.000 Remember Bill Burr's bit like 12 years ago where he's just like, I'm just stealing it.
00:28:11.000 Now we're all like, no, we'll just pay for it.
00:28:12.000 I'll sift.
00:28:12.000 And they'll have a tip at the end at the airport.
00:28:14.000 I just rang myself up and you want a tip?
00:28:16.000 Get fucked.
00:28:17.000 Give me my money back.
00:28:18.000 That's the tip.
00:28:18.000 That's ridiculous.
00:28:19.000 The tip thing is crazy.
00:28:20.000 But people are trying to weasel tips out of you everywhere.
00:28:23.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:28:24.000 It's weird how like some things get tips like a Starbucks barista, but other things you never think about tipping.
00:28:30.000 Yeah.
00:28:31.000 That are like harder jobs.
00:28:33.000 Yeah.
00:28:33.000 So this might be classist on me or whatever.
00:28:36.000 When I see the grocery delivery guy, I often see someone that I feel like could use the money more than the fucking barista at Starbucks.
00:28:42.000 So I try to over tip them.
00:28:43.000 I'll do the $1 standard at a coffee shop because my friends shame me.
00:28:47.000 But now I'm kind of classist in how I tip.
00:28:51.000 I'm like, who needs it more?
00:28:52.000 And then I'll over tip that guy.
00:28:53.000 Well, I like to tip people.
00:28:55.000 It's fun.
00:28:55.000 It feels nice.
00:28:56.000 I've heard your tips are pretty crazy.
00:28:58.000 It feels good.
00:28:59.000 I call it like a little love bomb.
00:29:01.000 You leave a love bomb for someone.
00:29:03.000 It changes their day.
00:29:04.000 I'm fighting against my Indian heritage anytime I leave a big tip.
00:29:08.000 I'll do it, but it's tough.
00:29:10.000 It took a lot of work.
00:29:11.000 I'm Italian, and Sinatra and all those guys.
00:29:15.000 Everybody's handing out big tips.
00:29:17.000 That's a big thing for the Italians.
00:29:18.000 It makes people feel better.
00:29:20.000 It's a nice thing to do.
00:29:22.000 It makes people feel better.
00:29:23.000 But my point is, how come you don't tip the stewardess on an airplane?
00:29:27.000 Because they're the fun police, dude.
00:29:29.000 That's why.
00:29:29.000 Sometimes.
00:29:30.000 They are the fun police.
00:29:30.000 Can I just have my seat back while we land?
00:29:32.000 Why can't I have my seat back while we land?
00:29:33.000 What's your fucking deal?
00:29:34.000 It makes no sense.
00:29:35.000 Yeah.
00:29:35.000 They're just doing their job.
00:29:36.000 I know.
00:29:37.000 They're forced to do that stupid shit.
00:29:38.000 But if you let me have my seat back, maybe I give you a 20 on the way out.
00:29:40.000 They'll get fired.
00:29:41.000 They didn't follow the stupid fucking protocol.
00:29:44.000 But those people, they're bringing you food, they're bringing you water.
00:29:49.000 It's true.
00:29:49.000 You press a button and then they have to come over to you.
00:29:51.000 You summon them with a button.
00:29:53.000 Yeah.
00:29:53.000 And they don't get a tip.
00:29:54.000 That's true.
00:29:54.000 But the Starbucks guy does.
00:29:56.000 Yeah.
00:29:56.000 Okay.
00:29:57.000 You know?
00:29:57.000 And that smug fuck.
00:29:59.000 Oh, some of them are so smug.
00:30:01.000 Yeah.
00:30:01.000 Is that a prerequisite for being a barista?
00:30:04.000 You have to, like, look at people sideways?
00:30:06.000 Can I tell you, I'm trying to tip better as I feel I'm more blessed.
00:30:10.000 And I remember COVID being like, oh yeah, these tips are, this is an important thing to do.
00:30:13.000 Right.
00:30:14.000 But if you give me any attitude, the way I press zero and then spin it back around to you so you can see me not tip, it makes me so happy.
00:30:21.000 I'm overjoyed.
00:30:23.000 Zero?
00:30:23.000 There you go, buddy.
00:30:24.000 That's a Texas thing, I think, to a degree.
00:30:26.000 We don't like rudeness at all.
00:30:28.000 Very yes sir, no sir.
00:30:29.000 I'm raised yes sir, no sir, yes ma'am, no ma'am.
00:30:31.000 Please, thank you.
00:30:32.000 These were huge when I was growing up.
00:30:34.000 So if you don't give me that, I feel so like, who the Fuck.
00:30:37.000 There's a real benefit in that kind of Texas-friendly politeness.
00:30:42.000 Yes.
00:30:42.000 There's a real benefit.
00:30:43.000 That makes everybody feel better.
00:30:44.000 Absolutely.
00:30:45.000 I call people ma'am and sir all the time.
00:30:47.000 Yeah.
00:30:47.000 Makes everybody feel better.
00:30:49.000 Yeah.
00:30:49.000 And now that I'm old, nobody gets offended anymore because I'm older than the people I'm sirring or ma'am-ing 95% of the time.
00:30:54.000 Yeah.
00:30:55.000 Yeah, I'm always older than young guys that I'm calling sir.
00:30:57.000 But it's, you know, it feels good.
00:31:00.000 Makes everybody feel better.
00:31:02.000 There's a method to it.
00:31:04.000 There's an intelligence to it.
00:31:06.000 Because that whole East Coast thing, you know, I grew up in Boston.
00:31:10.000 Everybody's hard-assed and hard-edged.
00:31:12.000 I'm over it.
00:31:12.000 It's like, yeah, I don't have to do that.
00:31:15.000 But I get why they're that way.
00:31:18.000 Because...
00:31:19.000 Everybody that lives on the East Coast, unless you move there recently, you're essentially the child of either immigrants or the children of immigrants who are, you know, of grandparents of immigrants.
00:31:31.000 Children or grandchildren of immigrants.
00:31:32.000 Yeah, someone came from a boat, and they landed on that spot, whether it was the 1920s or whatever the fuck it was with my family, it was in the 1920s.
00:31:41.000 So these people, they landed there from fucking Italy and Ireland, and they were poor as fuck and desperate.
00:31:48.000 They made it across the ocean on a boat without YouTube.
00:31:51.000 They didn't know what the fuck they were getting into.
00:31:53.000 They probably barely saw a photo of what America looked like.
00:31:55.000 They had no idea if they were going to get a job.
00:31:57.000 Those are hard-ass people.
00:31:59.000 And so those people raised hard-ass kids.
00:32:02.000 And it takes a long time to break that out of a generational cycle.
00:32:06.000 And I think for a lot of people that moved to California, I didn't even know people were friendly until I moved to California.
00:32:13.000 When I moved to California, I'm like, girls are so much nicer.
00:32:16.000 They're like, nice.
00:32:17.000 They're like, hi.
00:32:18.000 Hi, how you doing?
00:32:19.000 They're not going to just be mean to you?
00:32:20.000 Right.
00:32:20.000 Yeah.
00:32:21.000 I think some of it also is just the number of people, the density of population.
00:32:26.000 In Texas, I see a person every 90 seconds.
00:32:29.000 I can say hi to everyone I walk by.
00:32:30.000 In New York, there's too many people.
00:32:32.000 If I hold the door open for one person in Texas, two might walk through.
00:32:34.000 In New York, 30 might walk through.
00:32:35.000 So I'm not doing this.
00:32:37.000 That's a great point, because I walked my dog yesterday.
00:32:40.000 I'm walking down the street, and everybody I see, I'm waving.
00:32:42.000 How are you doing?
00:32:43.000 But I saw like five guys.
00:32:44.000 It's so much easier.
00:32:45.000 It's easy.
00:32:46.000 If you're in New York City, and you're walking on the street, and it's just constant flow of people coming your way, you literally can't wave to everybody.
00:32:52.000 You would be a crazy person.
00:32:56.000 Imagine if you walked out of fucking Fifth Avenue just waving at every single...
00:33:01.000 You'd get the shit kicked out of you.
00:33:02.000 Someone would get upset at you.
00:33:03.000 Like the Joker opening scene.
00:33:04.000 Just get chased down the street and get beaten the fuck up.
00:33:08.000 Bro, I've been watching a lot of videos on Instagram, unfortunately, of women getting punched in the face in New York.
00:33:13.000 I've seen like four or five of them over the last few days.
00:33:16.000 People just punching women for no reason.
00:33:18.000 Yeah, that's like a thing.
00:33:19.000 That's like a thing.
00:33:20.000 What is that?
00:33:21.000 I don't know.
00:33:22.000 I thought it was only white women at first, so it was just funny to me, but then I found out they're doing it to everybody, and now I'm scared for my wife.
00:33:28.000 Yeah, I saw some Asian lady get punched in the face today.
00:33:31.000 What the fuck?
00:33:32.000 For no reason.
00:33:33.000 Just walking down the street, and this dude just waited.
00:33:36.000 She had a mask on, too, by the way.
00:33:37.000 Maybe that's why.
00:33:38.000 Maybe that's why.
00:33:39.000 This dude just way laid her and knocked her mask off, sent her flying.
00:33:44.000 Out of nowhere.
00:33:45.000 You don't think you're going to get hit.
00:33:46.000 First of all, people die that way all the time.
00:33:48.000 Yeah, I've heard.
00:33:49.000 Because if you don't know you're going to get hit, and you get hit, you go unconscious, and you bang your head off the concrete.
00:33:54.000 It's like getting the world dropped on you.
00:33:56.000 Yeah, no, that's one thing that fighters are keenly aware of that most of us don't, I don't think, think about a lot.
00:34:01.000 You gotta really think about that on concrete.
00:34:04.000 Yeah.
00:34:04.000 Like, if you're gonna punch somebody on concrete, you might go to jail.
00:34:08.000 Yeah.
00:34:08.000 You might go to jail for a long time, and you might have horrible nightmares.
00:34:11.000 Yeah.
00:34:11.000 That you could've avoided that, you didn't have to do that.
00:34:14.000 Especially if you're skilled.
00:34:16.000 Yeah.
00:34:17.000 And you know that, like, I don't have to fuck this guy up, but this guy's fucking pissing me off.
00:34:20.000 Yeah.
00:34:20.000 I'm gonna teach this motherfucker a lesson.
00:34:22.000 Yeah.
00:34:23.000 I have a friend who had that exact situation.
00:34:24.000 He's like, I haven't fought since then.
00:34:26.000 I don't know what happened to the guy.
00:34:27.000 I had to get out of there.
00:34:29.000 And he's like a trained fighter.
00:34:30.000 And he's like, I don't know what happened to him.
00:34:32.000 I couldn't find out.
00:34:32.000 And that just haunts me.
00:34:33.000 I was very enthusiastic about fighting until I was 19. And when I was 19, I fought in this tournament in Anaheim, California.
00:34:40.000 It was the Nationals.
00:34:41.000 And I was the Massachusetts state champion.
00:34:43.000 And I fought this kid who was, I think he was from Illinois.
00:34:47.000 I think he was the Illinois state champion.
00:34:48.000 And I hit him in the head with a wheel kick.
00:34:51.000 What a wheel kick is, is like your body's spinning.
00:34:55.000 So I'm standing with my left foot forward and I'm spinning my right heel around in a circle.
00:35:01.000 And it has insane power.
00:35:04.000 I mean insane power.
00:35:06.000 The amount of power that you get in a wheel kick is because it's my legs, it's my upper body, there's a whip to it, it's got all this torque.
00:35:14.000 And I caught this guy.
00:35:15.000 He came at me with what's called a stepping roundhouse kick.
00:35:19.000 So he had his front leg forward and he stepped forward with his left leg.
00:35:22.000 He was gonna throw a kick and I spun with my right leg at the same time.
00:35:26.000 So I caught him running in and I blasted him in the face and he went out.
00:35:31.000 Faceplant, snoring, never woke up.
00:35:34.000 Never woke up.
00:35:35.000 He was unconscious for half an hour.
00:35:37.000 They put him in a stretcher.
00:35:38.000 I was watching.
00:35:40.000 He never got out of that stretcher.
00:35:41.000 They took him to the hospital.
00:35:43.000 I have no idea what happened to him, and it freaked me out.
00:35:47.000 It freaked me out.
00:35:49.000 I lost my next match, and that was my third match of the day.
00:35:54.000 Were you just like, I can't get over this?
00:35:56.000 No, no, I lost my next match.
00:35:58.000 The guy was just better.
00:35:58.000 I just lost.
00:36:02.000 When I went back to Boston, my main instructor, he wasn't there in California when I was fighting.
00:36:10.000 And so, because there was like a team of us, it was like 10 of us that went to California.
00:36:14.000 And he said to me, he goes, I heard you had a great knockout.
00:36:18.000 And I said, yeah.
00:36:19.000 He goes, wheel kick.
00:36:22.000 I go, yeah.
00:36:22.000 I go, I thought he was dead.
00:36:24.000 He never got up.
00:36:25.000 He goes, sometimes they die.
00:36:28.000 Fucked.
00:36:28.000 I was 19 and I was fighting for zero money.
00:36:32.000 None of it made any and my heel was sore.
00:36:36.000 I was limping the next day because my heel was sore from his face.
00:36:41.000 And then I was thinking, I'm not immune to that.
00:36:44.000 Someone could 100% do that to me.
00:36:46.000 We're whipping fucking bones at each other.
00:36:52.000 It changed my feeling about it.
00:36:55.000 I didn't have the same enthusiasm after that.
00:36:58.000 That was probably like the beginning of the end for me.
00:37:00.000 I fought for a couple more years, but it was like, that was kind of it.
00:37:04.000 I was kind of like, what?
00:37:07.000 Was your aspiration before that to be like a world champion fighter?
00:37:10.000 I wanted to be in the Olympics.
00:37:11.000 Ah, okay.
00:37:12.000 Yeah, but there was no money in Taekwondo.
00:37:15.000 There was no money in kickboxing either.
00:37:17.000 I had an offer for a kickboxing fight.
00:37:18.000 It was like 500 bucks.
00:37:21.000 Boy.
00:37:22.000 And then if I fought professional, then I could never fight amateur again because now I'm a professional.
00:37:26.000 Oh, okay.
00:37:27.000 So it was like 500 bucks.
00:37:29.000 Yeah.
00:37:29.000 It was like 500 bucks to train for like two months and maybe get pummeled.
00:37:33.000 Yeah.
00:37:34.000 You know, maybe get brain damaged.
00:37:35.000 Maybe get my nose shattered.
00:37:37.000 Yeah.
00:37:37.000 You know, maybe get my ribs kicked in.
00:37:39.000 Like...
00:37:39.000 And that's the beginning of the stand-up career, essentially?
00:37:43.000 Well, I was doing both at the same time as well, which is also a problem.
00:37:46.000 Because I knew I wasn't as committed to fighting.
00:37:49.000 But it really began with that 19-year-old when I knocked that dude out.
00:37:52.000 That was the beginning of the end.
00:37:53.000 And then it was like, later on, it was headaches from kickboxing.
00:37:56.000 Oh, wow.
00:37:57.000 I was getting a lot of headaches.
00:37:58.000 I was getting headaches.
00:37:59.000 Like after sparring, I would be lying in bed and my brain would just be throbbing, just boom, boom, boom.
00:38:06.000 And I remember thinking, what am I doing?
00:38:08.000 Like, am I ruining my brain?
00:38:10.000 Because I knew a lot of guys who their brain got ruined.
00:38:13.000 And it didn't seem like they realized it.
00:38:17.000 It didn't seem like, because they were still fighting.
00:38:19.000 It didn't seem they realized, or maybe they didn't know what to do, or maybe they just weren't that smart, but they were still fighting and training, but I was realizing they were slurring their words, and there was just this clear evidence that something was off.
00:38:33.000 And I was like, oh my god, is that happening to me?
00:38:36.000 Is that going to happen to me?
00:38:37.000 Yeah.
00:38:37.000 You know?
00:38:38.000 And then there's also, later on I realized, there's also other side effects of that.
00:38:42.000 Yeah.
00:38:42.000 Which is like impulsiveness, gambling addiction.
00:38:45.000 Yeah.
00:38:45.000 People get crazy.
00:38:46.000 They start doing a lot of drugs.
00:38:47.000 They drink a lot.
00:38:48.000 A lot of guys become drunks because they're just trying to like, they're just trying to feel good.
00:38:52.000 Yeah.
00:38:52.000 They just feel terrible all the time.
00:38:54.000 Yeah, and we had no idea about any of this back then.
00:38:56.000 You're in a fog of depression.
00:38:58.000 Yeah.
00:38:58.000 Because people thought back then, punch drunk was a thing.
00:39:03.000 That was real.
00:39:04.000 Everybody knew a guy, but no one worried about it up until it was obvious.
00:39:08.000 Right.
00:39:08.000 You know, and no one worried about, there's a sub-concussive...
00:39:12.000 Traumatic brain injuries that cause a lot of CTE, which is chronic traumatic encephalopathy.
00:39:19.000 Right.
00:39:20.000 And that's the thing that makes people kill themselves and, you know, do wild shit and lose their fucking mind.
00:39:27.000 But soccer players get that.
00:39:29.000 I know.
00:39:30.000 From hitting the ball.
00:39:31.000 I've heard this, and it's so crazy how delicate the brain is.
00:39:33.000 We don't think about it.
00:39:34.000 It's super delicate.
00:39:35.000 It's super delicate.
00:39:37.000 That's why I tell my friends that are all, they still like to spar.
00:39:40.000 I was like, man, I know it's fun.
00:39:41.000 I know it's fun to spar, but don't do it.
00:39:44.000 Don't fucking do it, man.
00:39:46.000 Don't do it, because you could just slip away and not even realize that you slipped away.
00:39:50.000 Yeah.
00:39:51.000 Because all you have to do is like spar with one meathead.
00:39:53.000 Yeah.
00:39:53.000 One guy, and then he hits you, and you get mad, and you hit him, and next thing you know, you're in a fight.
00:39:58.000 Right.
00:39:58.000 You're in a fight in the gym, and a lot of fights happen in the gym.
00:40:02.000 There's a lot of sparring matches that essentially become fights.
00:40:06.000 People don't break it up?
00:40:08.000 No, most gyms don't.
00:40:10.000 It depends on the gym.
00:40:12.000 I mean, a really good gym will break it up, especially if someone's better than the other person and they're wailing on them.
00:40:15.000 A really good gym will stop that.
00:40:17.000 But a really good gym will not want you to spar like that most of the time anyway.
00:40:21.000 Most of the time they want you to what they call technical spar.
00:40:24.000 So you're just kind of like, you're hitting each other, but you're not like full blasting each other.
00:40:28.000 You're just getting timing in.
00:40:30.000 And that's a really great way to spar if you trust...
00:40:33.000 You're a sparring partner.
00:40:34.000 So if you got a guy that you could do it with and he's cool and you're cool and you like each other, you know, and you can make this agreement like if I hit him, I'm gonna hit him like this, like kick him.
00:40:43.000 I'm just gonna like stop at the body.
00:40:45.000 And if you do that, then you really develop sharp timing and it's great.
00:40:49.000 But you do have to do hard sparring every now and then because you got to know what that feels like and the consequences of making mistakes are so much more.
00:40:57.000 I'm gonna be honest.
00:40:58.000 I think about getting into like jujitsu and stuff and then you start talking like this and I'm like, I think I'm okay.
00:41:02.000 I think I don't need this.
00:41:04.000 I think I'm not built for it.
00:41:05.000 Yeah.
00:41:06.000 Well, I'm a grappler.
00:41:08.000 Well, you got Hassan looking good.
00:41:10.000 I went, by the way, Mothership is beautiful.
00:41:12.000 Hassan took me yesterday.
00:41:13.000 Thank you.
00:41:13.000 Gorgeous.
00:41:14.000 Mitzi's also.
00:41:15.000 As a non-drinker, I didn't have any interest in Mitzi's and then I went there and I was like, oh, this is a vibe.
00:41:20.000 Yeah.
00:41:20.000 This is like a speakeasy and then I heard it's shut down for anybody but comics after a certain hour.
00:41:24.000 Yeah.
00:41:25.000 That's awesome.
00:41:25.000 After 11 p.m., it's comics and they're friends.
00:41:27.000 That's awesome.
00:41:28.000 But yeah, Ahsan looks good, dude.
00:41:30.000 And he said he was training with you.
00:41:31.000 Yeah, I got those guys on a workout boot camp.
00:41:34.000 Shane Gillis, Ahsan, Derek Poston, Brian Simpson, Duncan Trussell.
00:41:40.000 Is Poston still doing only meat?
00:41:42.000 He's doing carnivore?
00:41:43.000 He told me he was doing that.
00:41:44.000 So is Ahsan, yeah.
00:41:45.000 I got them on that for January.
00:41:47.000 It was World Carnivore Month.
00:41:48.000 And I said, I just want you guys to try this for one month.
00:41:51.000 He said it was so hard.
00:41:52.000 You could eat eggs.
00:41:52.000 It is hard.
00:41:53.000 Yeah.
00:41:54.000 But once you get accustomed to it, like, that's how I eat, man.
00:41:57.000 I mean, I'll still eat whatever I want every now and then.
00:42:01.000 Yeah.
00:42:01.000 But the vast majority of my diet is all just meat and eggs.
00:42:06.000 No veggies?
00:42:07.000 Very little.
00:42:08.000 If I want to.
00:42:09.000 Like, the other night I had a salad.
00:42:10.000 I felt like having a salad.
00:42:11.000 And blood work is all good, no?
00:42:13.000 It's great.
00:42:13.000 Oh.
00:42:13.000 It's great.
00:42:14.000 Everything's great.
00:42:15.000 Look at that.
00:42:15.000 Yeah.
00:42:16.000 No, it's amazing.
00:42:17.000 It's like your body wants to eat real food.
00:42:21.000 And if you're eating bread and all that bullshit, it's not real food.
00:42:25.000 It's just your body's like...
00:42:26.000 I'm never tired.
00:42:28.000 Okay, so through the...
00:42:29.000 I used to get the...
00:42:30.000 Look, I... 100% I'm addicted to pasta.
00:42:35.000 Like if you give me a big bowl of like linguine with clams, I will fuck that up.
00:42:41.000 I will fuck some lasagna up.
00:42:43.000 You put a pizza in front of me, I can't stop eating.
00:42:45.000 I'll eat a whole pizza, a whole extra large pizza.
00:42:48.000 Right.
00:42:50.000 That's not good for you.
00:42:52.000 And when I would eat like that, I would always crash.
00:42:56.000 I would get these moments like the middle of the day.
00:42:59.000 I was like, I gotta take a fucking nap.
00:43:01.000 I wanted to take a nap.
00:43:02.000 I love that feeling.
00:43:03.000 It's a great feeling.
00:43:05.000 It's so fun.
00:43:05.000 It's so fun to just be able to take a nap if you can.
00:43:07.000 But if you're busy and you can't take a nap and now you gotta go do things and you're all droopy.
00:43:12.000 But when I started eating only meat, one of the first things I noticed is that my energy levels were completely level throughout the day.
00:43:20.000 It was flat.
00:43:20.000 It never went up.
00:43:22.000 It never went down.
00:43:22.000 I was like, this is crazy.
00:43:24.000 Like, I'm not getting tired where I'm expecting to get tired.
00:43:27.000 And then I realized, oh, that's probably like an insulin dump.
00:43:30.000 Like, my body's probably fucked up from all this carbs, all this sugar and bullshit that I'm putting in my body.
00:43:36.000 And as soon as I stopped doing that, I felt so much better.
00:43:39.000 And that's what those guys said.
00:43:40.000 That's what Hassan said and Derek said.
00:43:42.000 They're like, dude, I feel so much better.
00:43:44.000 I have so much more energy.
00:43:45.000 Yeah.
00:43:46.000 Because you're not poisoning yourself.
00:43:48.000 Yeah, I did like a keto style thing.
00:43:49.000 It was called Soda, this thing.
00:43:51.000 Before I filmed the special, I let go of like 20 pounds.
00:43:53.000 And it was, I didn't realize the idea of eating fat instead of carbs is fat, even with a smaller amount, it's just more filling.
00:44:00.000 So carbs, you can eat 200 calories of carbs.
00:44:03.000 Yeah, protein and fat.
00:44:04.000 Carbs, I'm hungry again right away.
00:44:06.000 If I have even just a teaspoon, tablespoon and a half of olive oil, I'm good for four or five hours usually.
00:44:12.000 Yeah, it's a higher satiety level.
00:44:16.000 So if you just eat a 16-ounce steak, you put a 16-ounce rib eye in front of you, And if that's all you're eating, you'll be full.
00:44:23.000 You'll eat that and you're like, that was great.
00:44:25.000 But if there's mashed potatoes right next to it with gravy and then maybe some french fries and then maybe over there there's a little bit of spaghetti and meatballs.
00:44:32.000 I'm going to keep eating.
00:44:33.000 I'm going to keep stuffing my fat, stupid face and then at the end of it I'll be like this.
00:44:39.000 Oh, fuck.
00:44:41.000 Yeah.
00:44:41.000 Oh.
00:44:42.000 Which is still my favorite thing to do.
00:44:44.000 It's a great feeling.
00:44:44.000 Yeah.
00:44:44.000 But it's really bad for you.
00:44:45.000 Yeah.
00:44:46.000 It's a great feeling that's like drinking.
00:44:47.000 It's a great feeling that's really bad for you.
00:44:49.000 Yeah.
00:44:49.000 I don't drink, but I will gorge.
00:44:52.000 Yeah, it's not good, man.
00:44:53.000 It's not good.
00:44:55.000 You really – especially one of the things as you get older, you realize there's a giant difference between people my age that take care of themselves and people my age that neglect their health.
00:45:05.000 They deteriorate.
00:45:07.000 Like I have friends that are my age and when I tell people, we're the same age.
00:45:11.000 They're like, what?
00:45:13.000 Other people can't even believe it.
00:45:15.000 How is that guy your age?
00:45:16.000 Because he didn't do anything.
00:45:18.000 He didn't take care of himself.
00:45:19.000 You have to take care of yourself.
00:45:20.000 You've got to treat your body like it's a fucking car.
00:45:22.000 If your car's got a fucked up transmission, get it fixed.
00:45:27.000 Change your fucking oil, stupid.
00:45:30.000 Have you seen this guy Brian Johnson?
00:45:32.000 He was on Flagrant.
00:45:33.000 He's fascinating, dude.
00:45:34.000 He's fascinating.
00:45:36.000 He says he eats, like, 1800 calories a day, and the saying he says is kind of fiery.
00:45:39.000 He goes, every calorie is fighting for its life.
00:45:42.000 Every calorie has a purpose, and if we can't find a purpose for you, you're out.
00:45:46.000 Yeah.
00:45:46.000 Every piece of food has a purpose.
00:45:48.000 He's also, like, injected his son's blood into him.
00:45:51.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:45:52.000 So when I first read articles...
00:45:55.000 Here's what I'll say.
00:45:56.000 When I would just read articles, he's coming on the pod, we're researching, and I'm like, they paint him as like this billionaire fuckboy who just wants to be a billionaire and have sex with an 18-year-old or whatever.
00:46:05.000 They kind of make him seem like that.
00:46:06.000 When you talk to him, he's like, I think humans can live forever with the help of AI, and I just want to push us there.
00:46:12.000 And you feel like...
00:46:14.000 Oh yeah, this is not, he's not like, he was wearing like a unicorn shirt when we saw him in like some blue corduroys.
00:46:20.000 No, nothing fashionable about this man.
00:46:21.000 He just, and I think his dad is pretty sick, and so he, I think, wants to make humans live forever very soon so his dad can stick around.
00:46:28.000 It's actually like, there's a lot more nobility to it when I talk to him than when I just read articles about him.
00:46:33.000 Isn't it interesting that you would be skeptical about a person who wants to live longer?
00:46:38.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:46:40.000 Well, a billionaire who wants to live forever sounds...
00:46:42.000 Those things together sound evil genius, like Lex Luthor.
00:46:46.000 Right, but it also makes people like, no, everybody's gonna die.
00:46:50.000 You too.
00:46:50.000 It's like, especially poor people that don't have the money to do all the shit that he's doing.
00:46:54.000 Because what he's doing is cost like millions every year, right?
00:46:56.000 Yeah, two million, I think, a year on his body, yeah.
00:46:58.000 That's crazy.
00:46:59.000 Yeah, LeBron spends a million a year, and this guy's not even an athlete, but two million a year.
00:47:02.000 Yeah.
00:47:04.000 I mean, he looks okay.
00:47:05.000 He looks great, dude.
00:47:06.000 He looks pretty good.
00:47:07.000 He's in better shape, obviously, than he was five years ago.
00:47:11.000 Yeah.
00:47:11.000 He's also a vegan, though, which I found fascinating because there's not a lot of evidence that that's good for him.
00:47:16.000 He didn't think that was healthy.
00:47:17.000 He thought he could be as healthy and protect the environment, I believe.
00:47:20.000 He thought the environmental cost of meat right now is too high.
00:47:22.000 Yeah, he should read more.
00:47:23.000 It's not protecting shit.
00:47:25.000 You're encouraging monocrop agriculture.
00:47:27.000 You're encouraging the death of untold numbers of creatures when they fucking...
00:47:31.000 When they cultivate those crops, when they cut them down and run those fucking combines through them, everything dies, dude.
00:47:41.000 If you think one life is one life, so if you think a bison is as important as a mouse, well, you're a hypocrite.
00:47:48.000 Because those ground squirrels, shrews...
00:47:52.000 Really?
00:47:53.000 Yeah, ground nesting birds, fawns, rabbits.
00:47:59.000 Things get fucking destroyed.
00:48:01.000 If you talk to farmers, one of the things you see after they run a combine through the field is vultures.
00:48:08.000 Vultures and crows just flying over the field because they know everything got fucked up.
00:48:12.000 So if one life is one life, and this is not to say that there's not a horrific loss of life every day with, like, chickens.
00:48:21.000 The number of chickens that get killed in this country every year is in the billions.
00:48:25.000 It's in the billions.
00:48:27.000 How many chickens do we kill every year?
00:48:30.000 Let's find out.
00:48:31.000 I was watching this thing on all the different animals that get killed.
00:48:34.000 Like, what's the highest number of animals that get killed?
00:48:37.000 Is it chickens?
00:48:38.000 It's gotta be chickens.
00:48:38.000 Chickens is high up there.
00:48:40.000 I don't know if it's number one.
00:48:41.000 But there's a lot of different things that get fucking killed and eaten by people.
00:48:47.000 But monocrop agriculture is terrible for the environment.
00:48:51.000 It's not good.
00:48:52.000 It's bad because you...
00:48:55.000 Like, topsoil.
00:48:56.000 You're not supposed to have 17...
00:48:59.000 Billion?
00:49:00.000 I think that's a billion.
00:49:01.000 What's that?
00:49:01.000 That was animals total.
00:49:03.000 Oh, 8 billion chickens.
00:49:04.000 8 billion chickens.
00:49:06.000 Every year?
00:49:07.000 US. US. 214 million turkeys.
00:49:10.000 That's surprising.
00:49:11.000 That's ridiculous.
00:49:11.000 Turkeys, they're like, they only exist because of Thanksgiving.
00:49:15.000 Yeah.
00:49:16.000 Wildly overrated meat.
00:49:17.000 Very overrated.
00:49:18.000 Yeah, I'm amazed that there's eight times more- Shellfish.
00:49:21.000 Look at this shellfish.
00:49:22.000 Oh my god.
00:49:22.000 43 billion.
00:49:24.000 No, that's fire.
00:49:24.000 I love shellfish.
00:49:25.000 That one, they got it.
00:49:27.000 3 billion fish.
00:49:28.000 23 billion?
00:49:29.000 Oh, a million ducks.
00:49:30.000 Yeah, 23 million ducks.
00:49:33.000 Worldwide chicken said it was like 70 billion.
00:49:37.000 70 billion!
00:49:38.000 Woo!
00:49:39.000 Every year.
00:49:40.000 That's crazy.
00:49:40.000 Every year we kill 70 billion chickens.
00:49:42.000 Makes sense, though.
00:49:43.000 If there's 8 billion people, we all probably eat about 9 chickens a year on average.
00:49:47.000 You know what I mean?
00:49:47.000 I ate a chicken the other day.
00:49:48.000 Yeah.
00:49:49.000 Meanwhile, I have chickens.
00:49:50.000 I have chickens and they're sweet.
00:49:51.000 They're my pets.
00:49:52.000 Really?
00:49:53.000 That's what's weird.
00:49:53.000 Yeah.
00:49:53.000 I have like 15 chickens and they make eggs.
00:49:56.000 I eat their eggs.
00:49:57.000 But they're not worried about me at all.
00:49:59.000 I'm like, hey, ladies.
00:50:00.000 I come by, I give them food.
00:50:01.000 They get excited to see you.
00:50:03.000 You got a lot of land out there then.
00:50:05.000 Yeah.
00:50:05.000 Yeah.
00:50:06.000 Are you raising any other animals?
00:50:07.000 No.
00:50:07.000 Are you on a full farm or just the chickens?
00:50:09.000 No, just chickens and trying to keep my dog from eating the chickens.
00:50:13.000 My dog would be terrified.
00:50:15.000 My dog is seven pounds.
00:50:16.000 He'd be terrified of your dog and chickens.
00:50:18.000 Both.
00:50:19.000 Freaking out.
00:50:20.000 Oh, that's funny.
00:50:20.000 What kind of dog is it?
00:50:21.000 It's a Maltipoo.
00:50:22.000 Happy.
00:50:23.000 Aww.
00:50:23.000 I love him, dude.
00:50:24.000 I didn't want a small dog.
00:50:26.000 Aww.
00:50:27.000 My wife made me get a small dog, and I'm so happy.
00:50:30.000 Anybody who doesn't like small dogs, I say, meet Carl.
00:50:33.000 Yeah, he's fantastic.
00:50:34.000 Is he in your lap?
00:50:35.000 Yeah.
00:50:36.000 Look at this guy, dude.
00:50:37.000 Oh, little Carl.
00:50:39.000 Look at little Carl.
00:50:41.000 Yeah, it's the best.
00:50:41.000 Yeah, dogs don't get any cuter than Carl.
00:50:44.000 Yeah.
00:50:44.000 They just get different.
00:50:45.000 Yeah, wonderful.
00:50:46.000 Just traveling with a small dog is so much better than...
00:50:48.000 Yeah, they're great little buddies.
00:50:49.000 Yeah.
00:50:49.000 They're little pals.
00:50:50.000 Dude, I got the full sling.
00:50:51.000 I'm going to send Jamie a link.
00:50:52.000 I got the full sling.
00:50:53.000 I put him in there.
00:50:54.000 Just walk around him.
00:50:55.000 It's the best, dude.
00:50:56.000 Don't get punched.
00:50:57.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:50:58.000 What if you fell and crushed the dog to death?
00:51:00.000 No, I could never.
00:51:01.000 I would have to fall.
00:51:02.000 It's like a mother holding the son, you know what I mean?
00:51:04.000 You got instincts.
00:51:05.000 Unless you get cracked.
00:51:06.000 Oh, if I get cracked.
00:51:07.000 That's what I'm saying.
00:51:08.000 Like that Chinese lady I saw today.
00:51:09.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:51:10.000 I'm probably about as strong as her, so yeah.
00:51:12.000 She was a big lady.
00:51:13.000 Oh, definitely.
00:51:14.000 Less strong.
00:51:14.000 She was quite wide.
00:51:14.000 She got waylaid.
00:51:16.000 And the dude just stood over her after he waylaid her.
00:51:19.000 He just stood over her and he pretended like nothing happened.
00:51:22.000 He was talking to somebody else.
00:51:24.000 You know, young enough.
00:51:25.000 Yeah.
00:51:25.000 Yeah, I feel like young kids scare me the most because they don't know the value of a life yet.
00:51:29.000 No.
00:51:29.000 They don't get it.
00:51:30.000 I saw one kid that died in New York City.
00:51:32.000 These guys just walked up to him and cracked him and he fell backwards over the curb and fell back and slammed his head on the street.
00:51:41.000 Oy.
00:51:41.000 And died.
00:51:42.000 For nothing.
00:51:43.000 For 20 bucks.
00:51:44.000 They robbed him for $20.
00:51:46.000 That's all he had on him.
00:51:47.000 Fuck, dude.
00:51:48.000 I know.
00:51:48.000 It's crazy.
00:51:49.000 It's just crazy that our society is so fucked up that we've been spending so much money on shit like wars overseas and not nearly enough money on trying to figure out a way to have the minimum amount of people grow up to want to punch people in the face on the street.
00:52:08.000 Yeah.
00:52:09.000 Put a stop to that.
00:52:11.000 Or feel like they need to punch people in the street.
00:52:26.000 If they can pump money at that, what would the downstream effects of a lack of crime and violence, if you could give people hope and educate them at an early age and set people up saying, I'm gonna help you, I'm gonna mentor you, I'm gonna get you along in life.
00:52:41.000 The amount of money that we would spend to do that would pay for itself four, five, six times over and less crime, less bullshit, less losers, less problems, less prisons.
00:52:52.000 Yeah, so much of it seems like it just starts at home, and there's the generational trauma thing that you hear about a lot, and it's like, yeah.
00:52:58.000 Well, like we were talking about with the East Coast.
00:53:00.000 Exactly.
00:53:00.000 There's a little bit of generational trauma there.
00:53:01.000 Yeah, I had to think about, my dad struggled with alcohol abuse, struggled with a lot of stuff, and I had to understand what his life was supposed to be in India, and then what it was going to be here.
00:53:12.000 In India, he was like, Set.
00:53:14.000 He'd passed this exam that like 5 million people apply for and they select like 200. Like he was going to be a millionaire bare minimum, 24 years old.
00:53:22.000 Then he's at another family member's wedding and his little cousins are like, hey, you're getting married today too.
00:53:27.000 He had no idea.
00:53:28.000 Arrange marriage.
00:53:29.000 Getting fitted for clothes on his way to the wedding.
00:53:31.000 Jesus Christ.
00:53:53.000 And I was like, oh, this guy doesn't, this language he's not that good at, and he couldn't navigate the world the way he could in India.
00:54:01.000 He was supposed to be a superstar.
00:54:02.000 Then he comes here and he's in Texas as a brown guy in the 70s, probably less than to all these people, and he's used to being a star, and he can't be funny, and he can't be himself, and that just sucks the life out of you slowly, day by day.
00:54:14.000 What did he do in India?
00:54:16.000 It's called a PCS officer.
00:54:18.000 So there's a movie called 12th Fail, a Bollywood movie.
00:54:20.000 I love Bollywood.
00:54:22.000 But it's about a different post, but equally competitive.
00:54:25.000 That one is like IS, and then PCS is like a government officer.
00:54:28.000 Kind of like state police, I guess.
00:54:30.000 But like, you are at the very least well respected.
00:54:33.000 And if you want to be rich and take some bribes, you can do that.
00:54:36.000 And my dad would have done all of that.
00:54:37.000 He would have taken all the bribes.
00:54:39.000 All the bribes.
00:54:40.000 And in India, he just kind of knew.
00:54:42.000 He knew the culture.
00:54:43.000 He knew how to navigate.
00:54:44.000 He knew how to grease the wheels and all of that.
00:54:46.000 How to talk to people to get what you want.
00:54:48.000 Here, he's not charming because he doesn't know English well enough.
00:54:50.000 There, he can get anything he wants.
00:54:52.000 Here, he's just struggling trying to figure it all out.
00:54:55.000 And so, I've become keenly aware of like, I don't know if we as immigrant kids appreciate everything our parents had to go through to get here.
00:55:03.000 For us.
00:55:04.000 I'm not here without that.
00:55:05.000 Well, if my grandparents, it was actually my grandparents' parents that moved here, but if they weren't the type of people that were so gangster they were willing to get on that boat, I would be in Europe somewhere.
00:55:16.000 I'd be in Europe hanging out in a cafe, smoking cigarettes, talking shit.
00:55:20.000 Yeah, I would be a fat, spoiled piece of shit.
00:55:23.000 And it would have been fun.
00:55:25.000 I'd have been a rich kid.
00:55:26.000 But growing up in India, I wouldn't have been this what I am here.
00:55:28.000 I know that.
00:55:29.000 Yeah.
00:55:29.000 You want your own ability to carve a path.
00:55:33.000 And there's a lot of countries where that's not an option.
00:55:36.000 You can't really carve a path to do whatever you want to do.
00:55:40.000 Yeah.
00:55:41.000 That's not available to everybody everywhere.
00:55:43.000 Yeah, man.
00:55:43.000 Hopeless poverty.
00:55:45.000 I'm not saying there's not extreme poverty in America.
00:55:47.000 There is.
00:55:47.000 But I've seen hopeless poverty in India where it's just like, I don't know how y'all get out of this in three generations even.
00:55:53.000 Yeah, when you fly into Brazil, one of the things that happens when you fly into Rio, we would do UFCs there, you go through the favelas, the airport, and the drive from the airport to where the beach, where we're staying, you drive straight through the favela.
00:56:08.000 So all to the right of you is shantytowns, and you see extreme poverty.
00:56:13.000 And have you ever seen that movie, The City of God?
00:56:15.000 Yes.
00:56:16.000 Yes.
00:56:16.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:56:17.000 Whoa.
00:56:18.000 Yeah.
00:56:18.000 My friend Eddie Bravo said that makes Boys in the Hood look like Sesame Street.
00:56:22.000 Truly.
00:56:22.000 I remember thinking it was going to be an uplifting film, so I was horrified watching the whole thing.
00:56:26.000 But yeah, it's crazy, man.
00:56:28.000 And my friends from Brazil say that's exactly what it's like.
00:56:31.000 That's exactly what it's like in the favelas.
00:56:34.000 It's bad.
00:56:35.000 The runts, the kids that take over, they're like nine years old.
00:56:38.000 And they're just killing people.
00:56:39.000 Yeah, unbelievable.
00:56:39.000 They have no respect for life, no understanding.
00:56:42.000 I mean, their frontal cortex isn't even beginning to form.
00:56:45.000 Yeah.
00:56:47.000 You're 25 before you figure out what the fuck you're even doing with yourself.
00:56:50.000 I remember riding a train in India with my mom.
00:56:52.000 My mom has, like, fibromyalgia, all these joint issues, and then they, like, we had to move train stations, all this stuff, or, like, platforms or whatever, and everybody's just rushing, and people are, like, screaming, trying to get off the train.
00:57:02.000 So many people are getting on.
00:57:04.000 People are, like, screaming, like, please just let me get off.
00:57:06.000 And I'm like, yo, people are gonna die doing this.
00:57:09.000 And then we talked to family in India, and they might have just been saying it flippantly, but they said the cheapest thing in India is a man's life.
00:57:14.000 They said that in Hindi, but like, the idea that you just grow up around so much trauma and whatever, that it is what it is.
00:57:20.000 When there's a billion people, and that's what India has.
00:57:23.000 A billion.
00:57:24.000 On a land a quarter the size of America.
00:57:26.000 So a quarter the size of America, three times the population.
00:57:28.000 Yeah.
00:57:29.000 That's nuts.
00:57:30.000 Dude, the.4 of India's population, 1.4 billion, is bigger than America.
00:57:34.000 That's nuts.
00:57:35.000 So bigger plus a billion.
00:57:36.000 That's nuts.
00:57:37.000 Yeah.
00:57:38.000 You have to think a quarter the size of America and three times the population.
00:57:43.000 If you really put that all together, you're just like, what?
00:57:46.000 It's madness.
00:57:47.000 And I love India, and I love going back, and I also just understand how privileged I am that I was raised here, and I feel like we as immigrant kids take that for granted sometimes.
00:57:55.000 Isn't it interesting how some places just...
00:57:58.000 I guess it's the older ones, right?
00:58:01.000 Like think about high population places.
00:58:03.000 It's China, which is like our oldest civilization.
00:58:05.000 Yeah.
00:58:06.000 China has thrived economically for 4,000 years.
00:58:10.000 Yeah.
00:58:11.000 4,000 years.
00:58:12.000 Yeah.
00:58:12.000 So of course they have a billion people.
00:58:14.000 Yeah, true.
00:58:16.000 Serious poverty and all sorts of problems in China.
00:58:18.000 But the point is, they've been a unit for 4,000 years.
00:58:22.000 So people have been fucking.
00:58:23.000 They've been fucking for 4,000 years.
00:58:25.000 So much that they had to say, you can only have one kid.
00:58:28.000 And then they ruined everything.
00:58:30.000 That stupid idea.
00:58:32.000 Then they ruined everything.
00:58:33.000 So there's so many more men than there are women.
00:58:36.000 So now they have a real problem.
00:58:38.000 And then they realized that they were going to have a real problem.
00:58:40.000 So they started changing it and say you could have more kids.
00:58:43.000 I think you can have three now, right?
00:58:44.000 Is that what China's policy is now?
00:58:47.000 Are you not worried about China as a threat to America for global dominance?
00:58:52.000 I can't think of a better way to say it, but are you worried about China?
00:58:55.000 I think they've already won.
00:58:57.000 They've infiltrated all of our universities.
00:59:00.000 They give grant money.
00:59:01.000 They pay for things.
00:59:03.000 They buy up farmland.
00:59:04.000 They've been buying up farmland around military bases.
00:59:08.000 They sell America cheap cell phone towers and internet routers.
00:59:12.000 They sell them cell phone towers at a discounted rate so that they could have their cell phone towers around military bases so they could listen to everything that everybody fucking says.
00:59:21.000 I mean, yeah.
00:59:22.000 And then they get caught using like third-party access to like Huawei got kicked out of America.
00:59:28.000 Oh, that's right.
00:59:29.000 I forgot about this story.
00:59:30.000 I was ready to buy a Huawei phone because Huawei at one point in time had the dopest phones.
00:59:36.000 Really?
00:59:36.000 Bro, their phones are so dope.
00:59:38.000 Their phones are incredible.
00:59:40.000 They had cameras and batteries that were so much better than iPhones or anything that was available in America at one point in time, and they were just making these insane phones.
00:59:50.000 And I remember they made a Porsche-designed phone.
00:59:53.000 It was a Porsche-designed Huawei phone.
00:59:56.000 I'm like, this is the craziest phone I've ever seen.
00:59:57.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:59:58.000 And then all of a sudden, they put a ban on them.
01:00:02.000 And I'm like, there must be some real shit going down with the United States government.
01:00:06.000 Yeah, we let them get away with a lot.
01:00:08.000 What does it say here, Jamie?
01:00:10.000 There's a fine when you...
01:00:11.000 or there was a social upbringing fee or a social maintenance fee.
01:00:16.000 Oh, in China, if you had more than one kid.
01:00:18.000 And then it says the Sichuan province abolished the three-child policy, making it completely...
01:00:24.000 Lay on parents to legally have as many children as they want.
01:00:26.000 The real problem is the lack of women.
01:00:30.000 It's the different...
01:00:31.000 What is the population difference between men and women in China?
01:00:35.000 I think it's like 60-something percent men.
01:00:38.000 Yeah, that's a problem.
01:00:40.000 That's a real problem because the reality, at least in America...
01:00:47.000 America has a very high level of men who are single and have no sex.
01:00:57.000 Yeah.
01:00:57.000 It's pretty high.
01:00:58.000 I was one of those for a long time.
01:00:59.000 Here it is.
01:01:01.000 720 male inhabitants and 689 female.
01:01:05.000 That's not too bad.
01:01:06.000 What is that about?
01:01:08.000 That's not 60%.
01:01:09.000 No.
01:01:09.000 It's a little over 50. I think like 54, probably 53 if I had to guess.
01:01:13.000 Okay.
01:01:15.000 That's not too bad.
01:01:16.000 Yeah.
01:01:17.000 China's total population decreased for the first time in decades in 2022. And population decline is expected to accelerate in the upcoming years.
01:01:25.000 And that's because of the population of women versus men.
01:01:29.000 Yeah.
01:01:29.000 And then the gap in genders could increase because the older people that didn't have the one-child policy, they're going to start dying off.
01:01:35.000 Exactly.
01:01:35.000 Exactly.
01:01:36.000 And so in America, there was some study recently that they were talking about the amount of single men And men who don't have girlfriends.
01:01:46.000 Yeah.
01:01:46.000 And it's crazy high.
01:01:48.000 Yeah.
01:01:48.000 Because everybody's got super high standards.
01:01:51.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:01:51.000 There's a chart that shows the distribution from China from 1950 to 22, and it seems like it's almost the same the whole time.
01:01:59.000 Interesting.
01:02:00.000 Even after they had the one-child policy?
01:02:02.000 I don't know exactly.
01:02:03.000 Didn't change at all?
01:02:04.000 So it's only 51 to 48?
01:02:06.000 Pretty much the entire time, yeah.
01:02:08.000 Interesting.
01:02:09.000 Yeah, I would think it would continue to go down.
01:02:12.000 I don't know.
01:02:30.000 Yeah, there's this idea that if I criticize a government, I'm criticizing the people.
01:02:34.000 Like, the idea if you criticize Israel, you're anti-Semitic.
01:02:37.000 It's like, guys, let's let go.
01:02:38.000 If I criticize the Chinese government, Israeli government, I have no problem with U.S. groups of people.
01:02:42.000 Y'all are wonderful.
01:02:43.000 Government, y'all are a little nuts.
01:02:46.000 Of course.
01:02:47.000 Even with America.
01:02:48.000 Yes, absolutely.
01:02:49.000 Like, if you have an American flag, you're racist.
01:02:50.000 Shut up.
01:02:51.000 Yeah.
01:02:52.000 America is all of us.
01:02:53.000 You can't let the corrupt government take your fucking flag and decide that that's a colonizer's flag.
01:02:58.000 That's so stupid.
01:02:59.000 That's all of us, the children of immigrants.
01:03:01.000 Yes, a thousand percent.
01:03:02.000 And if I go to Europe and they make fun of America, I don't think they're making fun of me.
01:03:05.000 I don't think they hate Americans.
01:03:06.000 I'm not like, how dare you?
01:03:08.000 Meanwhile, you're probably accurate.
01:03:09.000 I'll probably laugh along with you.
01:03:10.000 Yeah.
01:03:11.000 Tell me more shit.
01:03:11.000 Yeah.
01:03:11.000 You're probably right.
01:03:13.000 What do you guys think is funny about us?
01:03:14.000 Yeah, exactly.
01:03:15.000 Yeah, we're killing everyone with our food.
01:03:17.000 Sure.
01:03:18.000 Yes, let's go.
01:03:19.000 We are definitely doing that.
01:03:20.000 Yeah, I hate that I've become that guy, but I've become that guy.
01:03:22.000 Well, Russia doesn't allow GMO foods.
01:03:25.000 They don't allow it.
01:03:27.000 Everything has to be organic in Russia.
01:03:30.000 I hate that, but I went to Europe and then I tasted like the food there.
01:03:34.000 And not that they're the best chefs, but the quality of everything is just so much more clean and pure.
01:03:38.000 And then you taste the stuff in America and you're like, oh, this is, they're right.
01:03:41.000 This stuff sucks.
01:03:42.000 It's killing us.
01:03:42.000 Well, we just have so much fast, cheap food.
01:03:46.000 Yeah.
01:03:47.000 Fast, cheap food that's terrible for you and that you never get satisfied.
01:03:50.000 You want to keep eating it.
01:03:51.000 But like Will Silvins was telling me years ago, he went to London in like 07. I just moved to New York.
01:03:57.000 We were talking and he was like, the chicken in London is actually white.
01:04:02.000 In America, it's called white meat, but it's kind of like yellowish, you ever notice?
01:04:06.000 And I'm like, I guess.
01:04:06.000 And then he goes, if you go to London or France or wherever and eat the chicken, it's purely white because they don't allow you to fuck with it like they do in America.
01:04:15.000 What are they doing to America to make it yellow?
01:04:18.000 I don't know what they're doing exactly.
01:04:19.000 You're the guy that researches.
01:04:20.000 I'm the guy that just talks shit.
01:04:22.000 But my friend Mike Albanese was talking about this exact thing, unrelated.
01:04:25.000 We were just talking.
01:04:26.000 He was like, dude, if you buy frozen chicken breast in America and you look at the ingredients list...
01:04:30.000 It's way more than just chicken and breast.
01:04:32.000 Is it?
01:04:32.000 Yeah, it's like whatever nitrate, whatever preservative, whatever.
01:04:36.000 It's just like a whole...
01:04:37.000 You can do anything.
01:04:38.000 The preservatives are what really fuck you.
01:04:40.000 You gotta imagine.
01:04:41.000 What is a preservative?
01:04:43.000 A preservative is something that discourages bacteria from eating...
01:04:48.000 Food.
01:04:48.000 So what does it do to the absorption of the nutrients in your body?
01:04:52.000 What does it do to your gut microbiome?
01:04:54.000 What does it do to all those things?
01:04:55.000 And that's something that people don't take into consideration when you eat something that has preservatives in it.
01:04:59.000 You're taking into your body a thing that discourages living things.
01:05:05.000 Your food is not supposed to last on a shelf.
01:05:09.000 I'm sure you've seen those McDonald's cheeseburgers that people take and they put them on a shelf.
01:05:14.000 It's just sitting there ready to be eaten.
01:05:16.000 Some dude has one from, what was the oldest one that dude had?
01:05:19.000 From the 80s, I think?
01:05:20.000 I think so.
01:05:21.000 He's got a cheeseburger.
01:05:22.000 It looks perfect.
01:05:24.000 It looks like he bought it at noon and it's 6pm.
01:05:28.000 It looks like a 6 hour old cheeseburger.
01:05:31.000 It doesn't look like a cheeseburger that's 30 years old.
01:05:32.000 And I hate, but that is a thing I think about.
01:05:34.000 If I'm like, where do I want to, God willing we have a kid, my wife and me, where do I want to raise them?
01:05:38.000 I'm like, oh at the foundation, the food here is fucked.
01:05:40.000 Do we need to leave just to get better food?
01:05:42.000 You can get good food here.
01:05:44.000 You don't have to.
01:05:45.000 Do I have to hunt?
01:05:47.000 1995. That's bonkers, dude.
01:05:52.000 That's so crazy.
01:05:52.000 It doesn't look that bad.
01:05:53.000 Yo, it looks fantastic.
01:05:55.000 That's 29 years ago.
01:05:56.000 This guy got it saved.
01:05:56.000 Look at that dude.
01:05:57.000 He's all happy with himself.
01:05:58.000 Look.
01:05:58.000 I got it saved.
01:06:00.000 Oh, is he eating it?
01:06:00.000 Is that second picture of him eating it?
01:06:02.000 Bro, he looks like he only eats that.
01:06:03.000 Yeah.
01:06:03.000 Yeah.
01:06:03.000 I think he's going to eat it.
01:06:05.000 That's crazy, dude.
01:06:05.000 Nah, he's faking it.
01:06:06.000 He's faking it.
01:06:07.000 He's not really going to eat it.
01:06:08.000 Yeah, okay, but that's crazy.
01:06:09.000 He's being silly.
01:06:09.000 He looks terrible.
01:06:10.000 Yeah.
01:06:10.000 That poor guy look like he's been eating McDonald's his whole life.
01:06:13.000 Yeah, but you know what doesn't look terrible?
01:06:14.000 That hamburger.
01:06:14.000 Doesn't look bad.
01:06:15.000 Looks perfect.
01:06:16.000 Especially for that old.
01:06:17.000 Yeah.
01:06:18.000 That's old as fuck.
01:06:19.000 That's a 30-year-old burger.
01:06:20.000 That's crazy, dude.
01:06:21.000 That's crazy.
01:06:22.000 A 30-year-old burger should not...
01:06:23.000 A 30-day-old burger should not last.
01:06:25.000 It should be gone.
01:06:26.000 Yes.
01:06:27.000 I mean, it should be gone.
01:06:28.000 Like, how long would it last?
01:06:30.000 Like, if rats never ate it, and you left it in an apartment, and then, like, society collapsed, and then, you know...
01:06:37.000 There's fries and a burger from 96, it says.
01:06:39.000 Wow.
01:06:40.000 Wow.
01:06:40.000 That's crazy.
01:06:42.000 What is wrong with these people that they're keeping a burger for 20 years?
01:06:45.000 Yeah, that's actually a great point.
01:06:47.000 Yeah, like, what kind of people are these?
01:06:49.000 Also, are they trustworthy?
01:06:50.000 How the fuck?
01:06:51.000 That's what I was just thinking.
01:06:52.000 How do you know?
01:06:53.000 It could be from Monday.
01:06:54.000 What else are they keeping?
01:06:54.000 Yeah.
01:06:55.000 Oh, yeah.
01:06:56.000 Bags of shit.
01:06:57.000 They're probably shit hoarders.
01:06:58.000 Gotta be, dude.
01:07:00.000 Gotta be.
01:07:01.000 Colostomy bags all the way to the roof.
01:07:03.000 Have you ever seen that episode of Hoarders where the lady was a shit hoarder?
01:07:05.000 No, that would make me vomit for sure.
01:07:07.000 It almost made me vomit.
01:07:08.000 I hosted Fear Factor.
01:07:10.000 But Gillis showed it to me.
01:07:11.000 It's horrific.
01:07:12.000 I don't want to show it because we've showed it before.
01:07:14.000 But watch shit hoarders.
01:07:16.000 This one lady was a shit hoarder.
01:07:18.000 I'm gonna be honest, I will not watch that, but yeah.
01:07:20.000 She was eating the shit.
01:07:21.000 Oh!
01:07:22.000 Dude, I can't do it.
01:07:23.000 I can't do it.
01:07:24.000 Yeah, I'm getting a little...
01:07:25.000 If you watch it, it's really...
01:07:30.000 She wanted to have one last meal in there.
01:07:31.000 Yeah, she wanted to have one last meal when they were about to clean out the place.
01:07:34.000 She's like, I've been eating poop for 20 years.
01:07:36.000 Oh, God.
01:07:38.000 Oh, my God.
01:07:38.000 What is her gut microbiome like?
01:07:41.000 Probably better than that guy, eating McDonald's.
01:07:43.000 That's the thing!
01:07:44.000 Son, I'm gonna throw up.
01:07:45.000 You guys are hearing about it, I'm gonna throw up.
01:07:46.000 I know, I know.
01:07:46.000 It's rough.
01:07:47.000 Oh, God.
01:07:48.000 There's something about eating shit.
01:07:49.000 Like, your body is just like, no, no, no, no, no.
01:07:52.000 Like, have you ever done your mom's house?
01:07:54.000 No, no.
01:07:55.000 Okay.
01:07:56.000 Your Mom's House podcast, they do a live pay-per-view show multiple times a year where they show things on camera.
01:08:06.000 They curate these things and bring comics on and they do sketches.
01:08:09.000 It's really fun.
01:08:10.000 Yeah.
01:08:10.000 They show you things that you cannot see any other way.
01:08:15.000 You would never be able to show it on YouTube.
01:08:17.000 It would be illegal.
01:08:18.000 You'd go to jail.
01:08:19.000 Yeah.
01:08:20.000 But you could do it in this thing because everybody's agreeing.
01:08:22.000 It's people eating their own shit, shitting into a plate, smearing it on their dick and jerking off.
01:08:28.000 Did they ever send you the thing they made for you, I think?
01:08:30.000 I'm not watching it.
01:08:31.000 Yeah, why would anyone?
01:08:32.000 I was just curious if you saw it.
01:08:33.000 I heard them talk about it, I think.
01:08:35.000 I don't even remember what it was, but...
01:08:36.000 Yeah, they wasted their energy on that.
01:08:38.000 I think they paid someone to make you like a special, you know, kick a cameo type stuff.
01:08:41.000 Yeah, fuck off.
01:08:42.000 I'm not watching that.
01:08:43.000 You know, shitting on yourself for Rogan is crazy.
01:08:45.000 Yeah, I'm sure it exists, and good luck.
01:08:47.000 I'm not seeing it.
01:08:48.000 I don't need to see that.
01:08:49.000 I'm busy.
01:08:49.000 I think it was for you.
01:08:50.000 Yeah, I'm sure it was, dude, because he knows I throw up.
01:08:53.000 Yeah.
01:08:53.000 Because when he had me on the show, I almost threw up like three or four times.
01:08:57.000 Yeah, I can't handle it.
01:09:01.000 They're eating pizza and shit.
01:09:03.000 They're so desensitized to it.
01:09:05.000 It's like it's nothing.
01:09:06.000 That's weird.
01:09:07.000 Your mom's house has been highlighting some of the most fucked up human beings they could find on the internet for quite a long time.
01:09:14.000 Dude, what a misleading title.
01:09:16.000 I know.
01:09:16.000 My mom's house is such a comforting place.
01:09:18.000 You know what I mean?
01:09:19.000 Yeah, I don't know why they came up with your mom's house.
01:09:21.000 Where were you?
01:09:22.000 I was at your mom's house.
01:09:23.000 Ah, there you go.
01:09:23.000 It's a talking shit podcast.
01:09:25.000 It's a fun podcast.
01:09:26.000 It's a really good podcast.
01:09:27.000 Maybe.
01:09:28.000 Tom and Christina are both hilarious.
01:09:29.000 Yeah.
01:09:30.000 But that pay-per-view show that they do is rough.
01:09:33.000 Yeah.
01:09:34.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:09:35.000 It's rough.
01:09:36.000 And then the normal pod is not like that.
01:09:37.000 That's just a pay-per-view.
01:09:38.000 Yeah, but in normal pod, they'll show you some fucked up things, though.
01:09:41.000 Okay, okay.
01:09:41.000 They'll show you some fucked up things.
01:09:43.000 Okay.
01:09:45.000 It's not a crazy thing, dude.
01:09:47.000 Yeah.
01:09:47.000 These subcultures are so funny.
01:09:49.000 Well, there's so many humans out there that are out of their fucking minds that they can gather together and get a community now.
01:09:55.000 Yeah.
01:09:55.000 Where, you know, if you're a guy who ate shit, good luck finding your peers.
01:09:58.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:09:59.000 Who's your colleagues?
01:10:00.000 Yeah, you hide that.
01:10:01.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:10:02.000 Now there's Reddit and you just find a guy who's like, me too!
01:10:05.000 You want to go on 4chan to get the real shit.
01:10:06.000 Oh, that's true.
01:10:07.000 Yeah, you want to get the real shit.
01:10:08.000 Yeah.
01:10:09.000 But yeah, I put it on a plate.
01:10:10.000 You want to go to someone that's uncensored.
01:10:11.000 I tuck a bib in, I get a knife and fork, and then I... Dude, I mean, shitting and cutting it up and scooping it with a spoon.
01:10:21.000 Choking on it while it's going down.
01:10:22.000 Oh, okay.
01:10:24.000 Yeah.
01:10:24.000 You see it stuck in between his teeth.
01:10:26.000 Oh, God.
01:10:27.000 Just chewing the shit.
01:10:28.000 Please, please, please, please, please.
01:10:29.000 Let's move on.
01:10:30.000 I can't do it.
01:10:31.000 I can't do it.
01:10:31.000 But meanwhile, for some guys, they're like, oh, anybody upload any new shit-eating content?
01:10:35.000 I'm really excited.
01:10:36.000 They get home and they're pumped for it.
01:10:39.000 Yeah, the internet is.
01:10:40.000 The variability of human beings is so extreme.
01:10:43.000 There's so many different kinds of people.
01:10:46.000 That's one of the things that you realize when you do a podcast, for sure.
01:10:49.000 Yeah.
01:10:49.000 Because you talk to so many different people.
01:10:51.000 Yeah.
01:10:51.000 So many different conversations.
01:10:53.000 Yeah.
01:10:53.000 And you realize, oh, this guy thinks different.
01:10:55.000 Yeah.
01:10:55.000 Oh, she just has a different upbringing.
01:10:58.000 Right.
01:10:58.000 She has a way of looking at the world that I didn't consider.
01:11:02.000 Yeah.
01:11:02.000 And then it's like it adds to your palate.
01:11:04.000 You know, it adds to your understanding of people.
01:11:07.000 Mm-hmm.
01:11:07.000 Because if you just live in a small town and hang around with the same people and you don't like to go online, you go to the same bar, whatever the fuck you do, you don't know how much people vary.
01:11:20.000 People vary so much, man.
01:11:23.000 There's so much variety on what it means to be a human being.
01:11:27.000 Yeah, that's actually, yeah, that's very profound, yeah.
01:11:30.000 I don't...
01:11:31.000 You could be some amazing person who is out there, like Jose Andres, going to these crisis areas and feeding people in Palestine, and you know that guy, Jose Andres, the chef?
01:11:43.000 No.
01:11:43.000 Amazing guy.
01:11:44.000 Oh, I know of him.
01:11:44.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:11:45.000 He owns my favorite restaurant in Vegas, which is Bizarre Meats.
01:11:49.000 I don't know if you've ever eaten there before.
01:11:51.000 No, I have not.
01:11:51.000 Bro.
01:11:52.000 Next time you go to Vegas, that place is insane.
01:11:56.000 It's a full honeypot because when you walk in, they have those Argentine grills.
01:12:01.000 You know what a grill works grill is?
01:12:02.000 It's like these Argentine grills where they crank them and they raise and lower over live hardwood.
01:12:08.000 I think I've seen that, yeah, yeah.
01:12:09.000 So they have fire with real hardwood.
01:12:12.000 So the coals and the fire's crackling, the stakes are searing, and they raise them and lower them depending upon what point in the cook it is.
01:12:20.000 At the beginning of the cook, you start off high, like way above the flames, and you slowly lower it down to sear it.
01:12:27.000 You walk in, the smell!
01:12:29.000 Oh!
01:12:30.000 It's amazing!
01:12:32.000 It's so good.
01:12:33.000 Well, that guy who runs that place is this incredible chef, and he goes, he went to Ukraine, he was feeding people in Poland when the Ukrainian refugees were trying to flee Ukraine during the beginning of the war when Russia invaded, and he's over in Palestine right now.
01:12:47.000 Where is he now?
01:12:49.000 Is he in the West Bank?
01:12:52.000 But anyway, so this guy goes over there and feeds people.
01:12:56.000 So you have this guy, who is this incredible chef, who's this beautiful human being, who's like really doing something that's selfless, really doing something that's just real charity, feeding people delicious food, because he's an incredible chef.
01:13:11.000 And then you have shit eaters.
01:13:13.000 On your mom's house.
01:13:14.000 You have people that are punching ladies for no reason.
01:13:17.000 You have chaos.
01:13:18.000 You have the wide spectrum of humans.
01:13:22.000 And there's so little thought and engineering in society of trying to figure out a way to mitigate all of our problems.
01:13:32.000 Instead, we just put band-aids here and band-aids there and spend more money and hire more government workers and spend, spend, spend and nothing gets fixed.
01:13:41.000 Yeah.
01:13:42.000 No progress at all.
01:13:44.000 If the government was the private sector The government was a business and other people could compete to be the government.
01:13:53.000 If iPhones sucked, Androids would just take over.
01:13:56.000 The reason why Androids are so good is because iPhones are so good.
01:14:02.000 But if you had to have a fucking iPhone, bitch, you'd have an iPhone 1. They have no reason to innovate.
01:14:09.000 If everybody had to buy an iPhone, our phones would suck dick.
01:14:15.000 They'd be terrible.
01:14:16.000 The reason why they're good is because of competition.
01:14:18.000 And government doesn't have competition.
01:14:20.000 The only competition they have is other government, which is horseshit.
01:14:23.000 Because it's fake.
01:14:24.000 It's all funded by the same people.
01:14:27.000 And it's not even profit-driven.
01:14:29.000 I worked at a not-for-profit organization for a few months, just as I was a comic trying to make money, and I was like, oh, no one works hard, because there's no bottom line.
01:14:38.000 There's no fear of losing your job.
01:14:40.000 The government is the same.
01:14:41.000 Government employees, they just take whatever time off they want.
01:14:44.000 They don't get fired.
01:14:45.000 It's the cushiest job every holiday off.
01:14:48.000 That was super evident during the lockdowns in Los Angeles, because the government was so flippant about closing people's businesses because they didn't lose any money.
01:14:57.000 Yeah.
01:14:57.000 My thought was like, listen, if you're managing a city, how about this?
01:15:01.000 You want an incentive?
01:15:01.000 How about your income is based entirely on what the GDP of your city is?
01:15:08.000 Oh, that's sick.
01:15:09.000 Entirely.
01:15:09.000 So if you go in and whatever the GDP is, let's say the GDP is $1 billion, whatever it is.
01:15:15.000 I don't know what it is.
01:15:15.000 Let's say it's that.
01:15:16.000 If it dips below that, you lose money.
01:15:20.000 And if it goes above that, you probably get a little piece.
01:15:24.000 You get a little taste.
01:15:24.000 Yeah.
01:15:25.000 Get a little taste.
01:15:25.000 And you're not allowed to make speeches for $250,000 when you're out of office.
01:15:29.000 It's done.
01:15:29.000 No, no, [...
01:15:31.000 Yeah.
01:15:33.000 Nobody wants to hear you talk for a quarter million.
01:15:35.000 Nobody, dude.
01:15:35.000 What a fucking...
01:15:36.000 That's crazy.
01:15:36.000 Yeah.
01:15:36.000 That's bribery.
01:15:37.000 No one.
01:15:38.000 You guys made deals.
01:15:39.000 Yeah.
01:15:39.000 Even if it's not a said deal, it's an understanding.
01:15:43.000 I also, I don't know if this is a reason, none of these, I don't know if they're reasonable, but the idea of getting reelected, I was like, at some point I was like, oh, they're just, they don't care about making the city better, they just want to get reelected.
01:15:53.000 So I'll go to these special interest groups who I know will vote for me, this voting bloc that I know will vote for me, I'll make them happy and I'll get reelected.
01:15:58.000 If you just gave a president or whoever one six to eight year term, but one term and then you're out, I think it would help mitigate a lot of the useless stuff that they do.
01:16:07.000 Slightly, but you would still get the vice president taking over afterwards.
01:16:11.000 They would set that person up.
01:16:12.000 They would make sure they maintain power.
01:16:14.000 They'd try to keep the same staff.
01:16:15.000 The thing about Biden right now, people are like, why does Biden want to run again?
01:16:18.000 Even if he doesn't really want to run again, his staff wants him to run again.
01:16:22.000 Because if he doesn't run again, if he doesn't win, they're all out of jobs.
01:16:26.000 So if you're that lady who's the White House press secretary, you're fucked.
01:16:30.000 It's like, who the hell is going to hire you?
01:16:32.000 The next person is not going to hire you to be the White House press secretary.
01:16:35.000 You're terrible.
01:16:36.000 You have to stay there.
01:16:37.000 You have to keep those jobs.
01:16:39.000 From White House press secretary, they're not going to be like, hey, Walmart is hiring greeters.
01:16:42.000 There's a lot of them female admirals, those fucking fake female admirals.
01:16:46.000 A lot of those people that you see in the White House, the head of health, whatever the fuck that person is.
01:16:51.000 That person ain't getting a job after Biden gets rid of him.
01:16:53.000 You think Trump's going to hire that guy?
01:16:55.000 Yeah, I just figured there's something.
01:16:57.000 Maybe outside of government, but something.
01:16:58.000 No, they gotta keep that job.
01:17:00.000 They want to keep that job.
01:17:01.000 All those people that are working in the administration, they're working very hard to keep that job.
01:17:05.000 And that's why you see all this crazy pressure on Trump.
01:17:07.000 That's a big part of it.
01:17:09.000 Big part of it is because he's gonna crack heads.
01:17:11.000 So there's a lot of united people trying to keep him out.
01:17:14.000 Yeah.
01:17:15.000 I think, I was saying this on stage or something, but I didn't have a problem with Trump, but the noise that Trump brought, I was like, I don't want it anymore.
01:17:24.000 It's just too much infighting.
01:17:25.000 I feel like he's learned.
01:17:27.000 There's like a Trump 2.0 as of now where he's like, let me just not say the race-baiting shit and let me just keep it here.
01:17:33.000 And I think most people, casuals, are like, I could get on board with this guy.
01:17:37.000 Well, also, the race-baiting shit is a little bit more effective now that they let in 30 million people.
01:17:42.000 Oh, fair enough.
01:17:43.000 If you want to talk about the fears of immigration, now people see it.
01:17:47.000 They see the real consequences.
01:17:49.000 I mean, they're letting murderers out with no bail.
01:17:51.000 The whole thing is wild.
01:17:53.000 People are getting accused of murder.
01:17:55.000 They're getting arrested, and then they let them right out.
01:17:57.000 Yeah.
01:17:57.000 This is a wild fucking time.
01:18:01.000 And no one wants to be in law enforcement.
01:18:03.000 No one wants that job.
01:18:04.000 Yeah.
01:18:05.000 It's a hard job.
01:18:06.000 Nobody cares about you.
01:18:07.000 They treat you like you're the fucking enemy.
01:18:09.000 Nobody respects you.
01:18:10.000 I'm taking your word for all this.
01:18:11.000 Very few people respect you.
01:18:12.000 I'm very blissfully ignorant, so I'm just taking your word for all this right now.
01:18:15.000 Really?
01:18:16.000 You're selling me.
01:18:17.000 I don't know.
01:18:18.000 Well, you know that the defund the police thing is fucking insane.
01:18:20.000 Yeah, that was crazy.
01:18:21.000 And so then there's this attitude that the police were the problem.
01:18:24.000 Yeah.
01:18:25.000 Isn't it crazy like one instance captured by one person in the camera and it just starts a fire keg.
01:18:31.000 Yeah, well, look, I've been with a, I was with a Damien Lemon, black comedian friend of mine, and he got, like, I was with him when we got racially profiled.
01:18:38.000 He was going, they pulled him over, they're like, you're doing 24, searched the car, brought other cops, they were searching me, like, do you have any drugs?
01:18:44.000 I was like, I've never done a drug in my life.
01:18:46.000 And he was like, you better be honest right now.
01:18:48.000 This is your chance.
01:18:49.000 They sit us on the curb.
01:18:50.000 We go home, and then I look up, I'm like, they kept saying we're doing 24. What's the thing with 24?
01:18:54.000 I looked up, just Googled 24 miles an hour in New York City.
01:18:57.000 The speed limit was 25. So he was under the speed limit.
01:19:00.000 What?
01:19:01.000 And they still pulled us over, whole thing.
01:19:03.000 Now, he had one of these- Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute.
01:19:05.000 It pulled him over for going under the speed limit?
01:19:07.000 Here's what bothered him.
01:19:07.000 There's not a 20?
01:19:08.000 There's not a 20 zone?
01:19:09.000 Apparently it was 25. From what I Googled, it was 25. But even 24 to 20, it's like- Crazy.
01:19:13.000 Yeah, who's pulling you over for that?
01:19:14.000 How do you know?
01:19:15.000 Yeah.
01:19:15.000 Especially if you have a fast car.
01:19:17.000 Like, you gotta look down every five seconds.
01:19:19.000 Yeah, exactly.
01:19:20.000 And so the one thing I think they were bothered by is a fan of his who was a cop gave him, like, the New York City vest that you can, like, park wherever you want to.
01:19:27.000 And so he was just parking, and they were upset about that, but, like, 24, and then calling backup cars and all that, I was like, there's something here, Rachel, going on.
01:19:35.000 I've never had this.
01:19:36.000 I've had a racist thing after 9-11, maybe one or two, but like, that I was like, oh, I see why this is.
01:19:43.000 And he was just, this was not that unusual for him.
01:19:45.000 I was like, this is crazy.
01:19:47.000 And he was like, what can you do?
01:19:48.000 Racial profiling is 100% legit.
01:19:50.000 Yeah.
01:19:51.000 There's no doubt about it.
01:19:51.000 So I think when you see these stories, Philano Castillo, I think was his name, or George Floyd or whatever, I think black people are like, I've been through that and I've been trying to tell you that happens and y'all don't want to listen to me, now you're seeing it.
01:20:02.000 Yeah, 100% it happens.
01:20:03.000 And then the storm comes.
01:20:04.000 Anybody that denies it happens, you're denying humans.
01:20:07.000 You're denying human nature.
01:20:08.000 You know how people are.
01:20:09.000 The real root of that is poverty and crime and gangs and drugs.
01:20:15.000 And no one's doing anything to stop that.
01:20:17.000 They're not doing a goddamn thing to stop that.
01:20:19.000 And hiring more cops is, you know, train them better.
01:20:23.000 Do everything you have to do.
01:20:25.000 Make sure that the cops are taken care of.
01:20:27.000 But...
01:20:29.000 You gotta fix the problem.
01:20:30.000 If you don't fix the problem, it's just gonna keep happening over and over and over again.
01:20:33.000 We had this guy on a long time ago that was a cop in Baltimore.
01:20:38.000 And while he was a cop in Baltimore, and his whole thing was about understanding the systemic racism involved in policing.
01:20:44.000 And that he didn't really realize it.
01:20:46.000 He was pretty honest about it.
01:20:47.000 He was, I was one of the bad guys until it kind of dawned on me what was going on.
01:20:51.000 I was the cop that didn't give a shit about the people.
01:20:54.000 I was the guy who would chase people down and yell at them.
01:20:56.000 But then over time, one of the things that they found, they found a police ledger They found a report of crime in the area in the 1970s.
01:21:06.000 It was like some old file.
01:21:07.000 And he's going through this old file and he's like, oh my god, it's the same crimes in the same place, but it's 40 years ago.
01:21:17.000 Like, this is fucking insane.
01:21:19.000 This is insane.
01:21:20.000 Like, how is this possible?
01:21:21.000 How is it, like, 1970, the same crimes are here today?
01:21:25.000 This is nuts.
01:21:26.000 And then he realized, like, oh my god, this is a broken system.
01:21:30.000 And then there's the whole redlining thing.
01:21:32.000 You wouldn't, if you were black, you couldn't buy homes in certain areas.
01:21:36.000 Like, they had...
01:21:38.000 Systemic racist practices, and then they never did anything about it, and then they had horrible policing, and then, you know, the wire.
01:21:45.000 You got fucking gangs and drugs and chaos.
01:21:47.000 And he realized it.
01:21:49.000 It was like, oh my god, this is a broken system.
01:21:52.000 So then he just started talking, going on podcasts, and talking to people about it.
01:21:56.000 What was it?
01:21:56.000 Did he have a proposed solution to fixing the system?
01:21:59.000 I mean, he's a cop.
01:22:00.000 I mean, I don't know if that's his thing.
01:22:01.000 He probably has some ideas.
01:22:03.000 I don't remember.
01:22:04.000 Honestly, I've talked to too many people, but someone's got to do something.
01:22:08.000 I don't know what you would do to do it, but it would be a long process.
01:22:12.000 If you think about, like, you've got to go all the way back to Jim Crow.
01:22:15.000 So you go to slavery, and then what happens after slavery?
01:22:18.000 Well, they don't have slavery anymore.
01:22:21.000 But you know what they do do?
01:22:22.000 They lock up black men for almost nothing and then force them to be slaves in prison.
01:22:27.000 And they create things, they work on the fucking chain gang.
01:22:30.000 All that shit is slavery.
01:22:32.000 And they would find ways to prosecute.
01:22:34.000 Look, we know today, I've done a ton of podcasts with Josh Dubin.
01:22:49.000 We've got a bunch of those guys come on the podcast, including one guy who came on who was actually guilty.
01:22:56.000 He was guilty before, and we knew he was guilty, but he got 50 years, and then he was talking about how he turned his life around a month after he was on the podcast.
01:23:04.000 How long was it after he was on the podcast?
01:23:06.000 Two months?
01:23:07.000 Maybe two months?
01:23:08.000 Cut some dude's head off, and he was wearing a blonde wig.
01:23:12.000 Homie didn't understand new HD security cameras.
01:23:15.000 Like, this dude put a blonde wig on.
01:23:17.000 They got crystal clear footage of him with his goatee on, wearing a blonde wig, carrying some dude's head.
01:23:23.000 How sold were you in the room with him?
01:23:26.000 How good was he at selling himself as this reformed person?
01:23:29.000 Well, you know, what does it mean?
01:23:32.000 Okay, so he didn't kill anybody in jail, and then he's out now, and he's got this new lease on life, and he's out, and he's trying to do something different with his life.
01:23:43.000 When you listen to his explanation of what happened, why he went to jail...
01:23:48.000 He was a drug dealer.
01:23:49.000 Right.
01:23:50.000 And he had gone to jail before, and some dude owed him money.
01:23:54.000 Some dude, some drug deal, and the guy was like, fuck you.
01:23:58.000 So he found the guy, and he pistol whipped him.
01:24:00.000 And he robbed him.
01:24:01.000 Okay.
01:24:01.000 And he got 50 years for that.
01:24:03.000 Right.
01:24:04.000 And he was a habitual criminal, for sure.
01:24:08.000 So, should he have gotten 50 years for that?
01:24:11.000 Well, I don't know.
01:24:13.000 I mean, it seems like when he got out, he was kind of a bad guy.
01:24:18.000 But was that because he spent 25 fucking years in jail?
01:24:24.000 I think he did 25 years before he left.
01:24:26.000 24?
01:24:27.000 Before they let him out, which is an insane amount of time to be locked up in a prison and then expect to acclimate.
01:24:33.000 So you're saying, did prison make him much worse?
01:24:36.000 Yeah, did prison make him much worse?
01:24:37.000 Because it certainly can with some people.
01:24:39.000 But we've had people on that were innocent and prison made them amazing.
01:24:42.000 I mean, something about the constant studying and the accepting your situation in life even though you were innocent.
01:24:50.000 And then a lot of those guys got released.
01:24:52.000 It's crazy to see them like they lost 20 years of their life for something that was bullshit, complete bullshit, and then you find out that the cops and the prosecutors who were involved in their case had done that to many, many, many people.
01:25:05.000 That's another thing that people need to take into consideration.
01:25:08.000 How fucking dirty some people involved in prosecuting and convicting people are.
01:25:14.000 You remember that guy in Pennsylvania?
01:25:16.000 There was a guy in Pennsylvania who was a judge who went to jail because it turns out that he was getting paid to have kids arrested and sentence them into juvenile centers.
01:25:27.000 Wow.
01:25:27.000 Paid by whom?
01:25:28.000 So he was getting a kickback.
01:25:29.000 He was getting kickback from the center.
01:25:41.000 Really?
01:25:48.000 Yeah.
01:25:48.000 Because they want people to get arrested, so that people go to jail, so they have jobs, which is fucking crazy to think.
01:25:54.000 But private prisons make money off people being incarcerated.
01:25:59.000 If you make money off a person being incarcerated, now you have an incentive for incarcerating people.
01:26:06.000 Just like pharmaceutical drug companies have an incentive to give you drugs you might not even need.
01:26:11.000 Yeah, a thousand percent.
01:26:11.000 Because they make money doing that.
01:26:13.000 And if you're a private prison, you don't even have to treat them that well because they're prisoners.
01:26:15.000 Who's really going to get upset on their behalf?
01:26:17.000 A few people that we're not going to take seriously.
01:26:19.000 So if their conditions suck, it's prison.
01:26:22.000 They're prisoners.
01:26:23.000 Why do I need to treat them well?
01:26:24.000 Nobody cares.
01:26:25.000 Yeah.
01:26:25.000 I mean, there's people that complain, but listen, there's some horrific conditions in prisons right now in this country.
01:26:30.000 Yeah.
01:26:30.000 And different prisons have different conditions and people know it and they try to get transferred to a prison that's lighter.
01:26:35.000 Yeah.
01:26:35.000 Yeah.
01:26:36.000 It's not really necessarily a correctional facility.
01:26:38.000 It's called that, but the aim is not correcting.
01:26:41.000 It's crazy.
01:26:42.000 It's crazy when you look at the rest of the world, like how many more people in the United States incarcerates.
01:26:47.000 There is a business.
01:26:49.000 Capitalism has flaws, and one of the flaws of capitalism...
01:26:53.000 Is that if you have something that generates income from a specific action, it's going to encourage that action.
01:27:00.000 It wants more of that.
01:27:02.000 And then if it's making tremendous amounts of money, like the private prison complex, you're going to be able to manipulate things.
01:27:09.000 Pharma, like you said.
01:27:10.000 That same thing.
01:27:12.000 Everybody's got to take the drug.
01:27:13.000 And then every other drug, demonize it.
01:27:15.000 Go on television.
01:27:15.000 Tell people it's veterinary medicine.
01:27:17.000 We saw it.
01:27:18.000 We saw it in real time.
01:27:19.000 We saw the devil.
01:27:21.000 We really saw the devil.
01:27:22.000 We saw the real thing.
01:27:24.000 And now they're forced to admit it.
01:27:26.000 I mean, even the fucking CDC had to take down some insane amount of tweets that they were talking about ivermectin.
01:27:32.000 Really?
01:27:33.000 They lost in court.
01:27:34.000 They had to take it down.
01:27:36.000 The whole thing.
01:27:37.000 Was the FDA or CDC? I also don't...
01:27:40.000 I'm not sure that...
01:27:41.000 Well...
01:27:43.000 They took down a bunch of them.
01:27:44.000 What are you thinking?
01:27:45.000 What's going through your brain when CNN is doing that?
01:27:47.000 Like, in real time, when you're looking at you and being like, that's not what I looked like.
01:27:50.000 What are you thinking in that moment as it's happening?
01:27:54.000 Like, the first thought as you're scrolling.
01:27:55.000 My first thought is like, this will work for a little bit until I start talking.
01:27:58.000 Okay.
01:27:59.000 Because this is not going to work.
01:28:00.000 First of all, they didn't understand that I had way more people that listen to my podcast than they have.
01:28:04.000 Like, way more.
01:28:05.000 Yeah.
01:28:06.000 A multiplier.
01:28:07.000 Yeah.
01:28:08.000 Also, like, that's crazy.
01:28:09.000 If you think you're going to make me look yellow.
01:28:12.000 The video's still on my Instagram, you fucking idiots.
01:28:15.000 Everybody could see what I really looked like.
01:28:17.000 I was better in three days.
01:28:19.000 And you're upset because one of the medications that my fucking doctor prescribed, I talked about a stack of medications that I took.
01:28:28.000 I wasn't on TV saying, hey kids, you don't need to get vaccinated, just take ivermectin.
01:28:34.000 No, all I said was, I got COVID. I was doing shows with Chappelle that weekend.
01:28:39.000 I can't go because I have COVID, but I feel great.
01:28:41.000 I took this, we threw the kitchen sink at it, and I feel better.
01:28:43.000 And then I was like, Rogan's taking veterinary medication.
01:28:46.000 And you were canceling the show, which is what you're supposed to do.
01:28:48.000 Yeah.
01:28:49.000 I immediately realized, like, wow.
01:28:51.000 Wow, this is how dirty it really is.
01:28:53.000 Because it was the same verbiage everywhere, horse dewormer.
01:28:56.000 It was something that was, they were saying it to make you look foolish.
01:28:59.000 They weren't saying, a medicine that won the Nobel Prize, a medicine that's been used in, it's part of the World Health Organization's list of essential medicines, a medicine that's been prescribed billions of times.
01:29:10.000 They weren't saying any of that.
01:29:10.000 A medicine with one of the safest drug profiles known.
01:29:14.000 They weren't saying that.
01:29:15.000 I didn't even know any of this.
01:29:16.000 They were saying horse dewormer.
01:29:17.000 Yeah.
01:29:17.000 Because they were banking on the idea that the casual observer doesn't understand how corrupt everything is and that they could just feed them bad information.
01:29:28.000 But in the age of the internet, when the government says things and everybody knows that it's not true or when the media says things and everybody knows that it's not true, It doesn't work forever.
01:29:39.000 It works in the beginning.
01:29:41.000 And there's still people out there that think I took veterinary medicine.
01:29:44.000 There's still people that think I was an idiot for taking ivermectin.
01:29:47.000 Yeah, there's a bunch of people that do...
01:29:49.000 They're surface level readers.
01:29:51.000 They read headlines.
01:29:52.000 They watch a quick clip on CNN. That's their consumption of media.
01:29:57.000 But most people are not like that anymore.
01:29:59.000 Most people have a real keen understanding that these people are like, Viciously corrupt and coordinated.
01:30:06.000 And when they coordinated in that way, it was such a dumb checkers move in a chess game.
01:30:12.000 It's just a stupid move.
01:30:13.000 You're playing tic-tac-toe.
01:30:14.000 This is retarded.
01:30:15.000 Similar to what people are feeling about the Trump prosecution.
01:30:17.000 Like, you're trying to make this guy look bad, and it's only going to make me like him more.
01:30:21.000 Also, you're doing it in a city that's overrun with crime, where women are getting punched in the face on the street.
01:30:28.000 You've got people pushing people in front of trains.
01:30:31.000 You've got so many real criminals that you're just letting out of jail with no bail.
01:30:36.000 That's so funny.
01:30:37.000 Because we talk about this on the pod, and I don't...
01:30:40.000 Again, I see...
01:30:41.000 What I will see is, like, I see more people just doing heroin on the street, which is crazy.
01:30:45.000 You see them doing heroin?
01:30:46.000 You see them.
01:30:47.000 Sure.
01:30:47.000 And actively shooting up.
01:30:48.000 I don't feel super unsafe.
01:30:51.000 There's a couple blocks in Manhattan, lower, I guess, the lower...
01:30:54.000 Like, not, like, 100s and below, where I'm like...
01:30:57.000 Walk around a lot, and I'm like, alright, be careful in these blocks.
01:31:00.000 But for the most part, I don't feel it.
01:31:01.000 Remember back in the day when you'd go to the McDonald's on McDougal, right by the cellar?
01:31:06.000 You'd walk into there and you'd be like, just have your head on a swivel.
01:31:09.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:31:11.000 There's a few blocks in New York where I feel that way now, but largely I feel okay.
01:31:15.000 I don't.
01:31:16.000 And again, I'm a guy that's like, I'm a mark, so let's have your head on a swivel.
01:31:21.000 But I don't feel it as much walking through the city.
01:31:23.000 It is definitely, the heroin thing is wild.
01:31:26.000 But it is different, right?
01:31:27.000 It feels different.
01:31:28.000 I also think maybe I was privileged to move in the safest time New York has probably ever seen.
01:31:32.000 Like, I moved in 08. I would walk home from New York Comedy Club, which was on like 23rd and 2nd, to my apartment on 50th and 8th, at 1 in the morning, barely even think about it.
01:31:42.000 Damn, you'd walk that far?
01:31:43.000 Yeah, it's just...
01:31:44.000 How long did that take?
01:31:45.000 About 45 minutes.
01:31:46.000 Like a 45-minute walk.
01:31:46.000 Nothing crazy.
01:31:47.000 That's a little exercise.
01:31:48.000 Yeah, a little exercise.
01:31:49.000 You just walk off kind of the adrenaline or just whatever.
01:31:51.000 Actually, it's probably good for going over your material.
01:31:54.000 Yeah, and then you're going over your set, you're just taking it all in, taking some time.
01:31:58.000 It was a great walk.
01:31:59.000 It's peaceful at night.
01:32:00.000 New York is rarely peaceful, so it's just quiet.
01:32:02.000 Now, I don't know if I would do that, but back then it was just like, wasn't even a thought.
01:32:07.000 And it was so safe.
01:32:08.000 I really probably took for granted how safe New York was back then.
01:32:12.000 And now I don't think it's as safe, but it's not the 70s or 80s for sure.
01:32:16.000 Yeah, it's not the 70s.
01:32:18.000 I went there in the 80s.
01:32:19.000 I went there for a karate tournament in like 19...
01:32:25.000 It had to be like 86, 87, somewhere around then.
01:32:29.000 And I remember thinking like, this place is nuts.
01:32:32.000 Yeah.
01:32:32.000 We went through Times Square.
01:32:33.000 I was like, this is nuts.
01:32:34.000 I heard Times Square was just like hookers and drugs.
01:32:37.000 It was all like peep shows.
01:32:37.000 Yeah.
01:32:38.000 Just weirdos.
01:32:39.000 Yeah, and now it's an M&M store.
01:32:41.000 You ever see that movie?
01:32:42.000 What was the movie with Dustin Hoffman and Jon Voight?
01:32:48.000 I don't know.
01:32:49.000 Was it Midnight Cowboy?
01:32:51.000 It was about gay hustlers in New York.
01:32:54.000 Yeah, Midnight Cowboy.
01:32:55.000 But that's like Times Square.
01:32:57.000 When people thought of Times Square, they thought of these nudie movie theaters and peep shows and just seedy drug dealers, weirdos.
01:33:05.000 Now it's all like fucking...
01:33:08.000 Yeah, there it is.
01:33:09.000 Good fucking movie, man.
01:33:10.000 I haven't watched that movie in forever.
01:33:12.000 Small time con, man.
01:33:14.000 Yo, they made some artistic movies back then that I just didn't realize.
01:33:17.000 Like, what's the movie?
01:33:18.000 Serpico.
01:33:19.000 No, it's just Serpico.
01:33:20.000 There's the one where Al Pacino's in Dog Day Afternoon, maybe, where he's robbing the bank or something.
01:33:24.000 Oh, yeah.
01:33:24.000 And he's trying to pay for his boyfriend's sex change operations.
01:33:27.000 That movie being around back then blew my mind.
01:33:30.000 Because I assumed they were so conservative, that movie would not be an Al Pacino-led film.
01:33:34.000 Well, that was actually a true story.
01:33:35.000 I didn't know that, but...
01:33:37.000 Yeah, Dog Day Afternoon is based on a true story.
01:33:39.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:33:40.000 In my brain, this was such a puritanical time in entertainment that a movie, even if it's a true story like this, would never get made.
01:33:47.000 Well, I think you could make that movie today.
01:33:50.000 Today, for sure.
01:33:51.000 But again, you think society's gotten so much more progressive and entertainment has gotten so much more liberal.
01:33:56.000 Now this movie makes perfect sense.
01:33:58.000 Yeah.
01:33:58.000 And it's about trans acceptance and all this stuff, and this was just a movie.
01:34:02.000 It's not just that.
01:34:03.000 Now it's in vogue.
01:34:04.000 It's like Hollywood has no soul.
01:34:07.000 They're not like, we're being more progressive.
01:34:10.000 They just think this is, oh, the wind's going that way.
01:34:12.000 Let's go that way.
01:34:13.000 Everyone should be trans, like South Park said.
01:34:16.000 Make it a chick and make it gay.
01:34:17.000 Yeah, absolutely, dude.
01:34:19.000 Absolutely.
01:34:20.000 I'm so glad we have, as comics, realized we don't need that validation anymore.
01:34:25.000 We got lucky, dude.
01:34:27.000 We got lucky because of this thing that's going on right now.
01:34:30.000 Well, actually, I think this thing that's going on right now couldn't be going on right now without the influence of the internet.
01:34:35.000 Right.
01:34:35.000 The internet has created this mind virus that's sweeping through college campuses.
01:34:39.000 Yeah.
01:34:40.000 And also the universities and the Marxist philosophies that they've been pushing in universities because they've all been infiltrated by Russia, by the former Soviet Union, and now by China and Russia together.
01:34:52.000 For sure they're influencing.
01:34:53.000 They push the wokest teachers, the wokest professors, the nuttiest policies, and they're literally doing it to deteriorate the fabric of American democracy.
01:35:05.000 They have, like, plans for it.
01:35:07.000 They've thought about it.
01:35:08.000 Like, Yuri Bezmanov talked about this in 1984. I've seen that clip.
01:35:12.000 It's crazy.
01:35:13.000 Crazy!
01:35:14.000 It's crazy.
01:35:15.000 When you watch it today, like, they were right!
01:35:16.000 It's very prophetic.
01:35:17.000 He did it!
01:35:18.000 Yeah.
01:35:18.000 They did it!
01:35:19.000 They really did it!
01:35:20.000 Thousand percent.
01:35:21.000 But, you know, The internet came along and threw gasoline on all those plans and made it much more chaotic.
01:35:31.000 But in doing so, it also created this other thing, luckily, because I think this other thing that we're doing right now, podcasts, being completely unregulated and being on even platforms that are corporate platforms like YouTube, pretty fucking unregulated.
01:35:45.000 No one's in flagrant.
01:35:47.000 No one's sitting down with you guys making sure you don't say anything wild.
01:35:50.000 Correct.
01:35:50.000 You upload it, and if you say something too wild, they'll flag it or they'll demonetize you.
01:35:55.000 But that's just that.
01:35:56.000 This could not have existed in any other time.
01:35:59.000 And so in the time where you have the most extreme polar social issues, and then you also have the most freedom of speech.
01:36:10.000 Yeah.
01:36:11.000 And even though they're trying to crack down on it with a lot of these...
01:36:14.000 I mean, I don't know how much you paid attention to the Twitter files.
01:36:17.000 Did you pay attention to any of that shit?
01:36:18.000 A little bit.
01:36:19.000 A little bit.
01:36:20.000 The fucking government was literally trying to censor true information that was on Twitter.
01:36:24.000 And they were successful.
01:36:25.000 And they infiltrated.
01:36:26.000 The intelligence agencies infiltrated various different social media platforms.
01:36:31.000 And if it wasn't for Elon...
01:36:34.000 We wouldn't know.
01:36:35.000 We would not know if it wasn't for Matt Taibbi and all those people that, like, Michael Schellenberger and Barry Weiss and all those people who went through the Twitter files and were like, look at this.
01:36:45.000 This is crazy.
01:36:46.000 This is crazy.
01:36:47.000 You wouldn't know that the actual government itself...
01:36:51.000 Is trying to sculpt the way people are allowed to disseminate information and see the world.
01:36:57.000 Yeah, because they've always been able to control everything.
01:36:59.000 And now it's like, well, we can control a little bit here and there.
01:37:02.000 See what we can do.
01:37:04.000 Tucker Carlson on the other day and explained to me Watergate.
01:37:07.000 Yeah.
01:37:07.000 And I was like, what?
01:37:09.000 What?
01:37:09.000 Like Watergate, there was an intelligence officer who became a reporter, and that's Bob Woodward.
01:37:18.000 Oh, I didn't know he was an intelligence officer.
01:37:20.000 There was this young guy, became a reporter, like right away, first assignment, which never happens.
01:37:26.000 Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein is the other guy, right?
01:37:27.000 Which never happens.
01:37:28.000 Never happens.
01:37:29.000 The people that broke into the office, CIA agents, CIA informants, CIA employees, and then...
01:37:38.000 Gerald Ford was on the Warren Commission, and he was the only one that they would accept for Richard Nixon's vice president.
01:37:47.000 The other guy, Spiro Agnew, they hit him with, I think it was tax evasion, so he's out, they get rid of him, and then they get Nixon in there, and then they get him with this whole Watergate thing, and they get rid of him.
01:37:58.000 And then he was the most, apparently, he was the most popular president in U.S. history, and he won the election by the largest margin in U.S. history.
01:38:07.000 Wow.
01:38:07.000 And they got rid of him in two years.
01:38:10.000 And it was a complete coup.
01:38:12.000 They took him out.
01:38:14.000 Nixon?
01:38:14.000 Yes.
01:38:15.000 Wow.
01:38:15.000 And what Tucker was saying, I don't know if this is true, but what Tucker was saying was that Nixon, he was very interested in the Kennedy assassination.
01:38:23.000 And he had said to the head of the CIA, I know why they killed JFK. Wow.
01:38:30.000 And he said nothing.
01:38:31.000 He just stared at him.
01:38:34.000 Apparently it's on video.
01:38:35.000 Or it's on video or audio or whatever it is.
01:38:38.000 So he was just explaining to me.
01:38:40.000 I'd never known that.
01:38:41.000 I thought Nixon was corrupt.
01:38:43.000 These intrepid reporters, these fucking go-getters, they busted him and they printed this thing and wow, we caught him.
01:38:51.000 He's a crook.
01:38:52.000 I still tend to believe that one more.
01:38:54.000 I'm not going to research, I'll be honest.
01:38:56.000 I want to pretend I'm going to research.
01:38:57.000 You don't have to research it.
01:38:58.000 If you just listen to what Tucker said, just listen to what he actually said about it.
01:39:04.000 We can play it for you.
01:39:05.000 Do we have a clip of that?
01:39:06.000 Is there a clip of that?
01:39:08.000 If you listen to what he's saying, you're like, wait, what?
01:39:11.000 I didn't know that.
01:39:12.000 I remember watching all the president's men and being like, oh, I see how journalism was important.
01:39:17.000 These two guys just changed the course of global history.
01:39:20.000 Bro, that might as well be a Chuck Norris movie.
01:39:25.000 That shit's straight fiction, son.
01:39:27.000 I'll break my heart, dude.
01:39:29.000 My wife got a master's in journalism.
01:39:31.000 I'm like, yo, what an important job this could be.
01:39:33.000 Oh, but it is an important job.
01:39:34.000 No, real journalism is very important.
01:39:37.000 And real journalism is critical for people to understand.
01:39:40.000 But I think a lot of the real journalism now is happening independently.
01:39:45.000 It's these people that they publish on Substack and they have a large following because people like Glenn Greenwald, people know that they can trust them.
01:39:52.000 They're going to give you the straight dope whether or not it's uncomfortable for you or not.
01:39:55.000 That's real journalism.
01:39:57.000 That's really important.
01:39:58.000 But as soon as you start working for a massive corporate entity like the New York Times or any other one, Washington Post, figure out what it is.
01:40:05.000 And that's where the Woodward and Bernstein, they were working for the Washington Post.
01:40:10.000 Do you find it?
01:40:12.000 The video?
01:40:12.000 Yeah.
01:40:13.000 Okay.
01:40:14.000 Check this out.
01:40:16.000 Look at that.
01:40:20.000 Well, the New York Times does that all the time.
01:40:21.000 But bizarre that they wouldn't have an issue with the government tapping into your phone.
01:40:26.000 They work for the government.
01:40:26.000 Are you kidding me?
01:40:27.000 The New York Times?
01:40:28.000 Yeah, the New York Times is a conduit for the lies of government.
01:40:32.000 That's what it is.
01:40:33.000 It's their tool.
01:40:34.000 And they're perfectly aware of that.
01:40:37.000 I mean, I used to write for the New York Times as a freelancer.
01:40:39.000 I mean, I've been around the New York Times a lot.
01:40:41.000 And there are, yeah, there are a lot of really smart people there, for sure.
01:40:44.000 Even now, less so now.
01:40:46.000 But there's still, I think, smart people there.
01:40:48.000 There are, I know some.
01:40:50.000 And they know.
01:40:52.000 But they think that it's worth it because they're bringing information.
01:40:55.000 I don't know what they think, actually.
01:40:57.000 But no, they're tools of power, and that's the one thing that you're not allowed to be.
01:41:03.000 Even if you think the power is good, maybe they all support the agenda of the U.S. government, destabilizing the world and impoverishing their own population.
01:41:10.000 Maybe they're on board with that.
01:41:13.000 Even if they are, they shouldn't do it because the job of the media, the press, Is to keep power in check.
01:41:21.000 You are kind of like the seatbelt, right?
01:41:26.000 You make sure that things don't go too far.
01:41:31.000 And they're not doing that.
01:41:33.000 They're acting as a willing handmaiden.
01:41:34.000 When do you think that switched?
01:41:36.000 I think it's been the case for a long time.
01:41:38.000 I mean, if you look at what happened to Richard Nixon, which I, of course, did not understand at all, Richard Nixon was taken out by the FBI and CIA, and with the help of Bob Woodward, who was a Washington Post reporter who had been a naval intelligence officer working in the White House,
01:41:58.000 working in the Nixon White House.
01:42:00.000 And then he shows up, like, a year later, and he's this brand new reporter.
01:42:06.000 He'd never been a journalist at all.
01:42:08.000 He's a naval intel officer.
01:42:10.000 The famous Bob Woodward, we all revere.
01:42:13.000 And he's at the Washington Post, and somehow he gets the biggest story in the history of the Washington Post.
01:42:18.000 He's the lead guy in that story.
01:42:20.000 Well, I worked at a newspaper.
01:42:21.000 I've been in the news business my whole life.
01:42:23.000 That is not how it works.
01:42:24.000 You don't take a kid like his first day from a totally unrelated business and put him on the biggest story.
01:42:30.000 But he was.
01:42:32.000 He was that guy.
01:42:33.000 And who is his main source for Watergate?
01:42:35.000 Oh, the number two guy at the FBI. Oh, so you have the Naval Intelligence Officer working with the FBI official to destroy the president.
01:42:46.000 Okay, so that's a deep state coup.
01:42:48.000 What else, how would you describe that?
01:42:50.000 If that happened in Guatemala, what would you say?
01:42:52.000 And yet, the way it was framed and the way that I accepted for decades was, oh, this intrepid reporter fought power.
01:42:58.000 No, no, no.
01:42:59.000 This intrepid reporter, Bob Woodward, was a tool of power, secret power, which is the most threatening kind, To bounce the single most popular president in American history, Richard Nixon, from office before the end of his term, and replace him with who?
01:43:15.000 Oh, Gerald Ford, who sat on the Warren Commission.
01:43:19.000 Now, how did Gerald Ford get to be Richard Nixon's vice president?
01:43:22.000 Well, because Carl Albert, the Democrat Speaker of the House, told him, you must choose him.
01:43:28.000 We will only confirm him.
01:43:30.000 When they sent the actual elected vice president away for tax evasion, Spiro Agnew, of Maryland.
01:43:37.000 So you have a complete setup, like an absolute...
01:43:39.000 Gerald Ford, the only unelected president in American history, actually sat on the Warren Commission.
01:43:45.000 Something else that I accepted at face value, until I looked at it, I was like, that's completely insane.
01:43:49.000 You didn't want to interview Jack Ruby in your investigation of the assassination?
01:43:53.000 Okay, you're fake.
01:43:54.000 Yeah, he was on the Warren Commission.
01:43:57.000 And so, sorry for the long story, but the point is, like, that happened in front of all of us, but the way it was framed cloaked the obvious reality of it.
01:44:06.000 The people who broke into the Watergate office building, from which the name is taken, Watergate, I think it was six of them or seven of them, all but one was a CIA employee.
01:44:17.000 That's real.
01:44:18.000 It's like look it up on Google.
01:44:20.000 So the whole thing, Richard Nixon was elected by more votes than any president in American history in the 1972 election.
01:44:29.000 He was the most popular by votes, which is the only way we can really measure popularity, the most popular president in his reelection campaign.
01:44:37.000 And two years later, he's gone.
01:44:49.000 Wild.
01:44:51.000 Wild.
01:44:56.000 Yeah, I need to look at it, too.
01:44:57.000 He said it, I'm taking it at face value, and I'm just telling everybody.
01:45:00.000 I'm not taking it at face value.
01:45:02.000 I'm not taking it at face value because he said it.
01:45:04.000 That's why.
01:45:05.000 It's been confirmed by other people to me.
01:45:07.000 Oh, really?
01:45:07.000 Yeah.
01:45:08.000 Fuck.
01:45:08.000 That's true.
01:45:10.000 It's crazy.
01:45:11.000 He didn't lie.
01:45:12.000 If he lied, he'd be in real trouble, and the people would be saying what he's saying is not true.
01:45:15.000 That's fair.
01:45:16.000 A bunch of stories written about it.
01:45:17.000 That's fair.
01:45:18.000 No, that's actually what happened.
01:45:20.000 We talked about this on Flick.
01:45:21.000 We had Vivek Ramaswamy on the pod, and again, he's great.
01:45:25.000 I think he's a very poor communicator of his message.
01:45:29.000 Really?
01:45:29.000 Yeah, because he'll talk about the deep state and all these things that when, if you're like me, who's a casual guy, who I think is a larger percentage of guys who really want to do the research, They're like, this is deep state, deep state.
01:45:41.000 And he'll talk about it as if it's this conspiratorial, dark, sinister, rub their hands together kind of.
01:45:46.000 And he's like, no, basically it's just bureaucracy.
01:45:49.000 There's a lot of unnecessary jobs in the government.
01:45:51.000 I just want to cut the fat out.
01:45:53.000 And we might lose some muscle by cutting it out.
01:45:55.000 But I think these people are just kind of like parasites, bureaucrats, just unnecessary jobs.
01:46:02.000 And they are controlling things in a way that is just for self-preservation.
01:46:05.000 And they think they know what's best for us, but they don't.
01:46:08.000 And it's kind of arrogant, but it's like well-meaning, well-intended.
01:46:11.000 I think they frame it in that it's best for us.
01:46:14.000 Really, it's self-preservation.
01:46:15.000 Yeah, but he said, I think they truly believe, and it's kind of like an elitist thing where they're like, these people don't know what's good for them.
01:46:21.000 We know what's good for them.
01:46:22.000 We're good to go.
01:46:41.000 It is, but it rings true with Trump people.
01:46:44.000 Yeah.
01:46:44.000 Yeah, deep state.
01:46:45.000 That's a good statement.
01:46:47.000 People like that sound.
01:46:48.000 And if he can get on a platform where he can really put his thought...
01:46:52.000 I think his brain dysfunctions at a high level.
01:46:54.000 I think he thinks this is how we're going to hear it.
01:46:56.000 He's like, you know what I mean?
01:46:57.000 Like, oh, these people aren't as smart.
01:46:59.000 I mean, they need to hear deep state.
01:47:00.000 That's what's going to work.
01:47:00.000 Well, he's also...
01:47:01.000 What is he, 38%?
01:47:02.000 Yeah, he's 38, I think.
01:47:04.000 That's very young.
01:47:04.000 Yes, incredibly young.
01:47:06.000 So he's learning this.
01:47:07.000 This is his first jaunt, right?
01:47:09.000 This is his first expedition into public speaking in front of the whole world about important issues.
01:47:15.000 He's going to learn from that.
01:47:17.000 Just like we were saying, there's Trump 2.0.
01:47:19.000 Vivek 2.0 in 2028. Vivek 2.0, great.
01:47:24.000 Vivek 3.0, that guy's going to be fantastic.
01:47:26.000 Also, Vivek 2.0 will be in his 40s, which is easier to accept.
01:47:30.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:47:31.000 He's got a little gray in his hair.
01:47:32.000 A little bit of life experience.
01:47:34.000 A little life experience.
01:47:35.000 Because I'm 39, I don't know shit.
01:47:36.000 Come on.
01:47:37.000 You know what I mean?
01:47:37.000 How can a guy your age be president?
01:47:38.000 That's crazy.
01:47:39.000 Buddy, I could barely run a household.
01:47:40.000 What are we talking about?
01:47:41.000 Exactly right.
01:47:42.000 This guy's younger than you, and he wants to be the president of the United States.
01:47:45.000 Insane.
01:47:45.000 That's insane.
01:47:46.000 Yeah, but I do think once he...
01:47:49.000 Put it like that, I was like, oh, that's a guy I would vote for.
01:47:52.000 I just want to get rid of the unnecessary jobs.
01:47:54.000 My wife's, both parents work for the government, state government.
01:47:56.000 They don't do anything.
01:47:57.000 The thing is, if all that stuff that Tucker's saying was true in the 1970s, 1972, or 74, they're still doing that.
01:48:05.000 They're going to do it to him.
01:48:07.000 It's probably what they're doing to Trump.
01:48:09.000 There's an element of that, folks.
01:48:10.000 Even if you fucking hate Trump, you should be very concerned about this stuff, because...
01:48:15.000 If this sets a precedent, if you can prosecute your political opponents and Republicans start doing it, you're going to be furious too.
01:48:22.000 If all of a sudden, so he gets out and then there's a new political guy.
01:48:27.000 Let's imagine that Trump wins and then it's Gavin Newsom.
01:48:30.000 And then the Trump administration starts going after Gavin Newsom and bringing him into court.
01:48:35.000 And having Republican judges run him up on charges.
01:48:38.000 And Republican prosecutors go after him.
01:48:42.000 That's not good.
01:48:43.000 That's not good for the country.
01:48:44.000 It's not good for anybody.
01:48:45.000 Yeah.
01:48:46.000 And you're all going to feel the same.
01:48:47.000 The same people who are in 2016, like Hillary got the election stolen because of Russia, in 2020, were like, shut up, Trump supporters.
01:48:54.000 You guys are crazy.
01:48:55.000 And it just flips.
01:48:56.000 And you guys are going to feel the exact same way if whoever you like on the Democrat side wins, and then they do this.
01:49:01.000 People have to understand that almost every election for the past 20 years has been disputed.
01:49:07.000 There was the John Kerry election.
01:49:09.000 That was disputed.
01:49:10.000 I remember Trump...
01:49:11.000 No, sorry.
01:49:12.000 Bush and...
01:49:14.000 And Al Gore.
01:49:15.000 Gore.
01:49:15.000 The dangling participles, right?
01:49:17.000 Is that what it was?
01:49:17.000 Hanging chads.
01:49:18.000 Hanging chads.
01:49:19.000 Dangling participles.
01:49:21.000 That's a word phrase.
01:49:24.000 That's hilarious.
01:49:25.000 It sounds just as dumb.
01:49:27.000 Yeah.
01:49:28.000 Yeah, the hanging chads.
01:49:29.000 Oh, that's stupid shit.
01:49:31.000 You know what's crazy?
01:49:32.000 I think they said Bush won Florida by like 500 votes.
01:49:34.000 And I think about like domino effect, and the domino effect of that is insane.
01:49:40.000 Because eight years of Bush is what got us eight years of Obama.
01:49:42.000 I think people were so done with Bush that they were like, Let's give a black guy a shot.
01:49:46.000 And then eight years of that, the white people that were kind of angry about Obama getting elected were like, fuck this, let's go to the guys that are going to piss them off the most.
01:49:54.000 Trump gets elected.
01:49:55.000 I feel like the domino effect of those 533 votes is crazy.
01:49:58.000 It's also Iraq and Afghanistan.
01:50:00.000 Oh, yes, absolutely.
01:50:01.000 Yeah, it's the invasion, the initial invasion of Afghanistan, the initial invasion of Iraq.
01:50:08.000 Yeah, for sure, absolutely.
01:50:09.000 No proof of that whatsoever.
01:50:10.000 Just 533 votes changed history forever.
01:50:13.000 Yeah.
01:50:13.000 That's one of the wildest ones that's ever been done.
01:50:15.000 Yeah.
01:50:16.000 The weapons of mass destruction.
01:50:18.000 That's a wild one.
01:50:19.000 Yeah.
01:50:19.000 And that no one went to jail for that.
01:50:22.000 No one got in trouble for that.
01:50:23.000 Like, wow.
01:50:24.000 Yeah.
01:50:24.000 How can you do that?
01:50:25.000 Yeah.
01:50:26.000 None of us questioned.
01:50:27.000 Can you imagine?
01:50:28.000 I remember in college, one guy being like, this isn't real.
01:50:31.000 And we were all like, what are you talking about?
01:50:33.000 He was like, this is George Bush Sr. What war did his dad fight?
01:50:36.000 Yeah.
01:50:36.000 And we're like, oh, fuck.
01:50:37.000 Yeah, I didn't even think about that.
01:50:38.000 Right.
01:50:38.000 And then you have George Bush, the one that won in whatever it was with the dangly chads.
01:50:44.000 Then you have 9-11.
01:50:46.000 Yeah.
01:50:46.000 Right?
01:50:47.000 So, he was a super unpopular president in September, and he gets, 9-11 happens, and then all of a sudden, everybody's on his side.
01:50:56.000 And the whole country's united.
01:50:58.000 And then, all of a sudden, we're invading Iraq, like a year later.
01:51:01.000 Like, what?
01:51:02.000 Like, what the fuck is going on?
01:51:04.000 And that is, I remember when the election was happening, they were like, no wartime president loses.
01:51:08.000 Bush is going to win a second term.
01:51:09.000 And he won.
01:51:10.000 And when Bush's dad was in office, you know, when the first initial invasion of Iraq, that was a weird one too.
01:51:17.000 Because it was like, Iraq invaded Kuwait, and then we invaded Iraq, and then we stopped short of overthrowing them.
01:51:28.000 Yeah.
01:51:29.000 It was weird.
01:51:30.000 Yeah.
01:51:30.000 I was like, we'll leave you there.
01:51:30.000 We're gonna get out of here.
01:51:31.000 Yeah.
01:51:32.000 I was just, you know, a term just struck me.
01:51:34.000 Remember Patriot missiles?
01:51:35.000 Mm-hmm.
01:51:35.000 I was five years old, and we got to hear about Patriot missiles, and I was like, that's fucking awesome, man!
01:51:40.000 Patriot missiles, we're such good guys!
01:51:41.000 And they had scuds, which sound wack.
01:51:43.000 Yeah, exactly.
01:51:45.000 Scud.
01:51:45.000 Yeah, the marketing of...
01:51:46.000 Shitty-ass missiles you got.
01:51:48.000 Great marketing, though, honestly.
01:51:50.000 In 1990, Patriot missiles.
01:51:51.000 Yeah, we're gonna kill thousands of innocent people, but patriotism.
01:51:55.000 Pretty good.
01:51:56.000 They did a lot of practicing then.
01:51:58.000 Yeah.
01:51:58.000 They used stuff that they weren't supposed to use.
01:52:01.000 And one of the things they did was they used depleted uranium rounds.
01:52:04.000 Really?
01:52:04.000 Which just go right through tanks.
01:52:06.000 They fuck tanks up.
01:52:07.000 But the problem with depleted uranium rounds is it creates horrific radiation.
01:52:11.000 And all these soldiers were like...
01:52:15.000 Going through the wreckage of these things and picking up pieces of it and bringing it home as souvenirs.
01:52:21.000 And radiation sickness was a giant factor.
01:52:25.000 They called it Gulf War Syndrome after the first war, after Desert Storm.
01:52:29.000 For our soldiers?
01:52:30.000 Wow.
01:52:31.000 Massive amounts of miscarriages and childbirth defects.
01:52:37.000 Wow.
01:52:38.000 People got sick and they called it Gulf War Syndrome and they were denied.
01:52:42.000 They were denied, but they were denying that it was real until investigative journalists dug into it and found out that it was most likely the result of depleted uranium rounds.
01:52:52.000 Jesus Christ, man.
01:52:53.000 Yeah, apparently depleted uranium is the shit.
01:52:55.000 If you want to like fuck up tanks and stuff, like it just shoots right through them.
01:53:01.000 Used as weapons because it's so dense, it self-ignites at high temperatures and pressures and because it becomes sharper as it penetrates armor plating, according to the International Atomic Energy Agency.
01:53:13.000 As depleted uranium penetrator strikes a target, its surface temperature increases dramatically, according to Oak Ridge Associated University's Museum of Radiation and Radioactivity.
01:53:24.000 Wow.
01:53:25.000 Yeah.
01:53:26.000 That's crazy.
01:53:27.000 So it's like the ultimate round for, like, stopping tanks.
01:53:31.000 Just goes through them like butter.
01:53:33.000 Boom!
01:53:34.000 But the problem is it's depleted uranium.
01:53:36.000 It's, like, insanely toxic.
01:53:38.000 Yeah.
01:53:38.000 And so Google, like, whatever happened with Gulf War Syndrome?
01:53:43.000 The miracle I'm looking at is from recent.
01:53:46.000 We sent some to Ukraine recently.
01:53:48.000 What does it say?
01:53:49.000 Oh, we sent some to Ukraine?
01:53:51.000 Of course.
01:53:51.000 We probably got a bunch laying around when they made it illegal.
01:53:54.000 Yeah.
01:53:54.000 The Pentagon said it will send depleted uranium armor-piercing ammunition to Ukraine as a part of its new assistance package, a step senior Russian official called a criminal act.
01:54:05.000 Here's a look at the concerns.
01:54:07.000 Wow.
01:54:07.000 There's a lot of big gaps in here.
01:54:10.000 So this is now, but Google Gulf War Syndrome cause.
01:54:18.000 Man, the fallout from just serving our side in war is crazy.
01:54:23.000 Chemical warfare, particularly nerve gas.
01:54:25.000 Okay.
01:54:26.000 Possible causes of Gulf War Syndrome.
01:54:28.000 Possible causes include chemical warfare agents, particularly nerve gas, or what's that word?
01:54:38.000 Pryodostigmine bromide, which is given as a preventive measure to soldiers likely to be exposed to chemical warfare agents.
01:54:44.000 So that might have fucked them up too.
01:54:46.000 Psychological factors such as post-traumatic stress disorder.
01:54:48.000 But what about Google Gulf War Syndrome depleted uranium?
01:54:54.000 Just do instead of cause, just depleted uranium.
01:55:02.000 Yeah.
01:55:02.000 Depleted uranium is both a chemotoxic and radiotoxic element.
01:55:07.000 Depleted uranium may be one of the causes for the so-called Gulf War illness.
01:55:13.000 Proposed effects of depleted uranium may be especially harmful if mitochondrial DNA is damaged.
01:55:19.000 Did depleted uranium cause Gulf War syndrome?
01:55:21.000 Click on that.
01:55:22.000 What does that say?
01:55:24.000 The illness suffered by soldiers who took part in the Gulf War syndrome was not caused by inhaling depleted uranium, according to a scientific study.
01:55:32.000 Instead, researchers believe the Gulf War syndrome may be due to soldiers being exposed to the nerve agent Sauron.
01:55:38.000 So, there's probably a bunch of misinformation that's put out by official people in regards to that, but I would imagine that would play a factor.
01:55:48.000 If depleted uranium was used And I know that a lot of the people, one of the things that they talked about, there was a documentary done on Gulf War Syndrome, and these people that were actually going through the wreckage of tanks wound up getting it, and they were talking about it that they didn't know.
01:56:04.000 Yeah, the burn pits that Jon Stewart talked about.
01:56:06.000 Oh, that's a big one.
01:56:07.000 Yeah.
01:56:07.000 That's a big one.
01:56:08.000 He's such a hero for, like, actually bringing attention to that.
01:56:11.000 That's the greatest.
01:56:12.000 That's fucking terrifying that they would burn all their stuff and anybody would be downwind of that would be breathing in toxic fumes.
01:56:18.000 Yeah.
01:56:18.000 I have some buddies who served over there and they would talk about how horrific it was.
01:56:21.000 Really?
01:56:22.000 Man, that's what I'm saying.
01:56:23.000 Even if you survive war, you come home, who knows, you're going to have Gulf War Syndrome.
01:56:27.000 Awesome.
01:56:27.000 Like, how little do they give a fuck about you if they burn toxic shit and it goes downwind and just runs through the camp?
01:56:35.000 Being a government, I think, this is why there's some level of sociopathy involved, is you have to be okay with the baseline level of innocent death, I think.
01:56:43.000 It's just what it is.
01:56:44.000 And that's a crazy thought.
01:56:45.000 Well, that's the justification for Israel bombing Palestine.
01:56:49.000 Yeah.
01:56:50.000 Right?
01:56:50.000 You have to be, this is war, and it's Hamas' fault that those innocent people are there.
01:56:55.000 I'm like, yeah.
01:56:55.000 Yeah, not our fault.
01:56:57.000 That is a crazy way to think.
01:56:59.000 People go, hey, this is what war is all about.
01:57:02.000 Says who?
01:57:03.000 Is this the only way to do war?
01:57:05.000 Is this the only way that this can actually be done?
01:57:07.000 There's no other way that takes longer and kills less innocent people?
01:57:10.000 No way.
01:57:11.000 This is it.
01:57:12.000 The only way.
01:57:13.000 You want to swat a fly?
01:57:14.000 You've got to swat a fly with a fly swatter.
01:57:15.000 That's it.
01:57:16.000 It's also easy to talk like that when you're on the winning side of it.
01:57:18.000 Or you're not anywhere near it.
01:57:20.000 You're here.
01:57:22.000 You're here in America.
01:57:24.000 I was watching some video footage that I thought was legit, and it's not.
01:57:29.000 I sent it to Shane Gillis, and then I realized after I sent it to him, hey man, I think this is a fucking video game.
01:57:39.000 But let me show you, because it's so crazy.
01:57:44.000 It's YouTube, but it seems so realistic.
01:57:48.000 I'm stunned by how good video games are now.
01:57:51.000 Check this out, Jamie.
01:57:52.000 I just sent it to you.
01:57:53.000 Remember the Ghost of Kyiv we were reading about when the Ukraine and the Russian war started?
01:57:57.000 It was a fucking video game footage.
01:57:59.000 I bought in, I was like, this guy's awesome.
01:58:00.000 Bro, this looks so good.
01:58:02.000 This looks so good.
01:58:03.000 I thought this was like some high-resolution government footage where they were just showing you what they can do now.
01:58:10.000 Look at this.
01:58:12.000 Go full screen.
01:58:14.000 Because this looks so dope.
01:58:16.000 Look at this.
01:58:17.000 Oh, shit.
01:58:21.000 By the way, now looking at it on a big screen instead of my phone, it looks like a video game.
01:58:25.000 On my phone, though, with my 56-year-old eyes.
01:58:30.000 Now look at this.
01:58:31.000 Look at the fucking ripples.
01:58:33.000 Look at this.
01:58:34.000 Oh, yeah.
01:58:35.000 Yeah.
01:58:36.000 That's crazy.
01:58:37.000 It sounds crazy.
01:58:39.000 This is incredible.
01:58:41.000 That this is a video game?
01:58:42.000 Yeah.
01:58:43.000 Yeah.
01:58:44.000 It does look like a video game on the big screen.
01:58:46.000 This makes me want to play video games though.
01:58:47.000 Goddammit, it looks good.
01:58:48.000 Yeah, I want to play this game.
01:58:49.000 Yeah.
01:58:51.000 Jesus.
01:58:52.000 How good are fucking video games now?
01:58:54.000 It's unbelievable.
01:58:54.000 It's only gonna get better, dude.
01:58:55.000 That's a real problem, man.
01:58:57.000 You're gonna live in that in five years.
01:58:59.000 100%.
01:59:00.000 Yeah.
01:59:00.000 And you're gonna love it.
01:59:01.000 Yeah.
01:59:02.000 And you're gonna be happy.
01:59:04.000 But there was some stuff.
01:59:05.000 Back it up a little bit, Jamie, because they go back and forth from black and white.
01:59:09.000 They show the rockets headed towards it.
01:59:13.000 A little further?
01:59:14.000 Yeah, right there.
01:59:15.000 Back it right there.
01:59:16.000 Watch.
01:59:16.000 Check this out.
01:59:18.000 Look at this.
01:59:18.000 When they show, like, the whatever sensors that they're using in this video game to track missiles.
01:59:25.000 Check this out.
01:59:26.000 Oh, this is crazy.
01:59:29.000 And then they have a camera on the missile.
01:59:34.000 Wow.
01:59:39.000 Nah, this seems crazy real.
01:59:41.000 Crazy real!
01:59:43.000 This looks like you're looking at it through...
01:59:45.000 Yeah, look at this shit.
01:59:46.000 Wow.
01:59:47.000 So they're going through different filters, different ways of looking at it, and then later on they show the actual missiles headed towards it.
01:59:55.000 Look at that.
01:59:57.000 Oh, yeah.
01:59:58.000 See if you get where the actual missiles are.
02:00:01.000 That's crazy.
02:00:04.000 That's it.
02:00:05.000 Back up right there.
02:00:06.000 Right there.
02:00:06.000 Where it's black and white.
02:00:07.000 This is crazy.
02:00:13.000 This is wild shit, man.
02:00:15.000 Yeah.
02:00:15.000 The fact that this has been being done through...
02:00:18.000 This isn't the transition that I saw earlier.
02:00:21.000 I don't know when it is.
02:00:22.000 It's a long-ass video.
02:00:23.000 Yeah.
02:00:24.000 But it's pretty incredible.
02:00:25.000 No, this is...
02:00:25.000 But it looks so realistic.
02:00:26.000 Yeah, we're going to be the Matrix, where you're just plugged into a thing, and you're just living...
02:00:31.000 100%.
02:00:31.000 I just hope my life is good in that Matrix.
02:00:33.000 Well, it's going to be better than the Matrix, because it's not going to be like a regular life.
02:00:38.000 You're going to be on a dragon.
02:00:39.000 You're going to be living in Never Never Land.
02:00:43.000 You're going to be living in some crazy Narnia world.
02:00:45.000 You're going to be able to do anything you want.
02:00:47.000 What is the game?
02:00:49.000 Arma 3. Arma 3. Yeah, I mean, this is brand new.
02:00:54.000 April 21st.
02:00:55.000 I don't even know what that game is.
02:00:57.000 Literally, this video came out yesterday.
02:00:59.000 It was fucking nuts, man.
02:01:00.000 It just stumbled across my feed and I thought it was legit.
02:01:03.000 Yeah.
02:01:04.000 For like 38 seconds.
02:01:07.000 Son, that game is, I mean, it's crazy what video games are doing.
02:01:10.000 There's now, like, I watch the NFL a lot.
02:01:12.000 When a guy scores a touchdown, they use like a 6K camera, and you look at that, and you're like, oh, that looks like a video game.
02:01:18.000 6K, the more crisp reality looks like the video game now.
02:01:22.000 I was watching a video yesterday on YouTube that was a review of the Google Pixel 8 Pro, and apparently it has AI in it that can give a smile for For your kid's face.
02:01:36.000 Oh, that's creepy.
02:01:37.000 It's correct, because he said, the guy was reviewing, he said, my one kid is never paying attention, never looked, well, then get a picture of him not paying attention.
02:01:44.000 Yeah.
02:01:44.000 You fucking weirdo.
02:01:46.000 Like, you're changing your kid's personality to be like this smiley guy who stares at the camera.
02:01:51.000 Yeah, it's a scary thought.
02:01:52.000 You can manipulate people's faces.
02:01:54.000 Yeah.
02:01:54.000 So you can swap their face around.
02:01:56.000 I saw someone, Lex tweeted yesterday this picture.
02:01:58.000 In the response, someone made that look.
02:02:01.000 He's smiling.
02:02:02.000 Wow.
02:02:03.000 Well, have you seen the new Microsoft software where they can take a photograph, just a photograph, and then with your voice have you say all kinds of shit in video, and it looks seamless.
02:02:16.000 Wow.
02:02:17.000 I'll send you that, Jamie.
02:02:18.000 It looks fucking seamless.
02:02:21.000 You see it, and you're like, this is incredible.
02:02:23.000 How is this that good?
02:02:25.000 It's so fucking good now.
02:02:27.000 It's going to be really fun.
02:02:29.000 Here it is.
02:02:29.000 I'll send it to you, Jamie.
02:02:30.000 I think...
02:02:31.000 I think, yeah, we're going to...
02:02:32.000 You got it?
02:02:33.000 Yeah, this is it.
02:02:34.000 ...all my attention, all my time on listening.
02:02:39.000 So instead of doing something else, I just listened, listened, and listened.
02:02:44.000 Because I'm a true believer that if you're really bad at something, like listening, for example, it only shows you that, hey...
02:02:54.000 The sound is not synced correctly in this video.
02:02:58.000 I think it's...
02:02:59.000 It's going to get better and better, though.
02:03:01.000 Yeah, but this is not how it looked on my phone.
02:03:03.000 On my phone, it looked different.
02:03:04.000 There's like a little disconnect here.
02:03:06.000 You keep blaming your phone for...
02:03:07.000 What's that?
02:03:08.000 You keep blaming your phone for these wrong things.
02:03:10.000 Yeah, no, no, no.
02:03:11.000 It's just going from the computer.
02:03:13.000 Yeah, no, I'm kidding.
02:03:14.000 I'm kidding.
02:03:15.000 But also, even if it's not perfect, this is the worst it will ever be.
02:03:18.000 Right.
02:03:19.000 That's what I always think about.
02:03:20.000 Right.
02:03:21.000 Oh, it's not.
02:03:21.000 It's not.
02:03:22.000 You can tell.
02:03:22.000 This is the worst it will ever be, and it will get exponentially better and better faster and faster.
02:03:26.000 And I think they only need 30 seconds of you talking.
02:03:29.000 That's crazy.
02:03:30.000 Yeah.
02:03:31.000 The Mona Lisa's rapping.
02:03:32.000 Look at this.
02:03:33.000 Give me some of that.
02:03:43.000 That's crazy.
02:03:43.000 Bro, that's Mona Lisa.
02:03:45.000 That's crazy.
02:03:47.000 It looks pretty good.
02:03:49.000 Yeah.
02:03:49.000 And you would not have imagined this five years ago.
02:03:51.000 Five years ago.
02:03:52.000 Five years ago, you'd be like, what is that?
02:03:54.000 That must cost a billion dollars to do.
02:03:56.000 I think three years from now, you're not going to be able to tell at all.
02:03:58.000 No.
02:03:59.000 Especially guys like you or I, who've had so many hours of us talking.
02:04:02.000 Yeah.
02:04:03.000 There's so many hours of you talking.
02:04:05.000 But the good thing now then is probably we can just say whatever we want to and be like, that was fake.
02:04:10.000 That's crazy hateful stuff, but that was fake.
02:04:12.000 I wonder if there'll be a way to tell.
02:04:13.000 I wonder if, I think eventually there won't be.
02:04:16.000 I think there's probably going to be a way to tell for a little bit, but then eventually there won't be.
02:04:21.000 Yeah, and then we just don't take it that seriously, hopefully.
02:04:23.000 Because there's a lot of other things you could edit on a phone now.
02:04:27.000 Like with the Samsung phones, you could delete things from the background.
02:04:30.000 It has AI. So like if someone's in the background, fuck that dude.
02:04:34.000 Just put a circle around them, the guy goes away.
02:04:36.000 Now he's not in your picture anymore.
02:04:38.000 And then they could literally move the position that you're in.
02:04:42.000 So if you're in the center of the thing, you're like, I want to be behind that park bench.
02:04:45.000 They just put you behind the park bench.
02:04:46.000 Dude, for my special, luckily we got prize picks to help me pay for the cost and then we did like an ad read in the middle.
02:04:52.000 The background, we filmed it on a green screen and my guy Kev created that background in like 30 seconds and you can't tell the difference.
02:05:01.000 It looks like maybe slightly different but so many people are like, did he stop the middle of his taping to do an ad read?
02:05:06.000 It looks so good.
02:05:08.000 It just added this stuff into, which probably before your guy got to it, but this has just been added to video editing software, some of the AI stuff we've been talking about.
02:05:16.000 It's now built into the actual editing software.
02:05:19.000 It's like what just happened on screen was they changed the small amount of diamonds into a large amount of diamonds, and it now works in the video that they're using.
02:05:29.000 Wow.
02:05:31.000 Just changing things, leading things right out of there.
02:05:34.000 That would take hours before.
02:05:35.000 Wow.
02:05:36.000 It might take a few people to do it.
02:05:37.000 And now it's instantaneous.
02:05:39.000 It took 10 seconds.
02:05:39.000 You didn't even know it was supposed to be there.
02:05:41.000 There's videos now.
02:05:42.000 I'm going to send you this, Jamie, because this video is entirely AI. The whole thing is a sci-fi trailer for a movie.
02:05:50.000 It's entirely AI and you would never believe it.
02:05:54.000 And again, what you just said is only going to get better.
02:05:58.000 This is the worst it's ever been.
02:06:00.000 Worst it's ever going to be.
02:06:02.000 It's going to get better real quick.
02:06:05.000 But this whole trailer that we're going to watch is entirely generated by AI. There's no actors.
02:06:11.000 There's no scenes.
02:06:13.000 This is all done on a computer.
02:06:15.000 This is not a sci-fi movie.
02:06:17.000 What the fuck?
02:06:23.000 Dude, close-ups.
02:06:24.000 Dude, the people look completely real.
02:06:26.000 Look at the ocean, Amalfi Coast.
02:06:29.000 That's beautiful.
02:06:30.000 This is not a drone shot from the Amalfi Coast.
02:06:32.000 Wow.
02:06:34.000 Look at the people moving.
02:06:36.000 Yeah.
02:06:36.000 Everything looks real.
02:06:41.000 This is not a snippet from a Natural Geographic documentary.
02:06:48.000 I mean, what the fuck?
02:06:49.000 That looks crazy.
02:06:51.000 Look at the dog, man.
02:06:52.000 That's crazy.
02:06:53.000 Do you remember how bad the dogs looked in I Am Legend?
02:06:55.000 Yeah.
02:06:55.000 The tigers?
02:06:56.000 The lions, rather?
02:06:57.000 Do you remember that scene?
02:06:58.000 Yeah, I do.
02:06:59.000 There's a scene when Will Smith is going through New York City, and the lions are out, and the lion takes out a deer in front of him.
02:07:05.000 See if you can find it.
02:07:06.000 It looks so CGI. It's so corny.
02:07:08.000 They shouldn't have even put it in the movie.
02:07:10.000 I wonder if at the time you think it looks real.
02:07:12.000 No.
02:07:13.000 And then you go back and you're like, this is the worst.
02:07:14.000 No.
02:07:14.000 I remember at the time, I was like, get the fuck out of here.
02:07:17.000 Because I watched a movie like 10 years later.
02:07:18.000 These deer look fake.
02:07:20.000 Dope Mustang, though.
02:07:20.000 Look at that Mustang.
02:07:21.000 Fuck yeah.
02:07:22.000 Driving around in a Shelby.
02:07:24.000 Yeah.
02:07:24.000 So watch this.
02:07:25.000 He's hanging out here, and he sees this deer, and he's about to shoot this deer because he wants some food.
02:07:29.000 Yeah.
02:07:32.000 Yeah.
02:07:39.000 Watch this line.
02:07:40.000 Look how fake this looks.
02:07:40.000 Yeah, it looks terrible.
02:07:50.000 Look at fake!
02:07:51.000 It looks so bad.
02:07:52.000 It looks so fake.
02:07:53.000 It looks almost as fake as his marriage.
02:07:58.000 Almost.
02:07:59.000 Not quite.
02:08:00.000 Not quite.
02:08:01.000 Almost.
02:08:03.000 Some people live in hell.
02:08:06.000 They really do.
02:08:07.000 They stay living in hell.
02:08:08.000 Yeah.
02:08:10.000 Oh, what a sad case that was, man.
02:08:12.000 He meant so much to me as a kid.
02:08:14.000 And now it's just...
02:08:16.000 All with one moment where he couldn't take a joke.
02:08:18.000 Yeah.
02:08:18.000 Or she couldn't take a joke.
02:08:20.000 One moment, and the whole guy's reputation is gone now.
02:08:24.000 All they had to do was just laugh it off.
02:08:26.000 I know.
02:08:26.000 And he was laughing.
02:08:28.000 G.I. Jane, mild shit.
02:08:29.000 Not even remotely.
02:08:30.000 And this is a...
02:08:31.000 Dude, it would have been one thing if she wasn't trying to be famous and he just brought her into a joke if she wasn't a celebrity.
02:08:36.000 But he's not making fun of your wife.
02:08:37.000 He's making fun of a celebrity.
02:08:38.000 Not only that, G.I. James is a badass movie.
02:08:40.000 Yeah, also, she's fucking awesome in that movie.
02:08:43.000 Yeah.
02:08:43.000 Isn't it like Navy SEALs she's training for in that movie?
02:08:45.000 Yeah.
02:08:45.000 Okay, God forbid.
02:08:47.000 She's a beast.
02:08:47.000 Yeah, God forbid you compare my wife to a Navy SEAL. How dare you?
02:08:50.000 That was like a big thing in the movie where Demi Moore said, suck my dick.
02:08:54.000 Did she really?
02:08:55.000 That's fire, dude.
02:08:56.000 It was in the movie.
02:08:57.000 That's fire.
02:08:58.000 Yeah, she's a beast.
02:08:59.000 Yeah, I would love for my wife to compare to this Navy SEAL saying, suck my dick.
02:09:03.000 It's hilarious.
02:09:04.000 Also, she's still hot in the movie.
02:09:05.000 Yeah.
02:09:06.000 I remember that.
02:09:06.000 She's still hot, bald.
02:09:07.000 She looks great.
02:09:08.000 Yeah.
02:09:08.000 Like, what's the big deal?
02:09:09.000 Yeah.
02:09:10.000 Jada still looks great.
02:09:11.000 I don't know.
02:09:13.000 Whatever, alopecia.
02:09:14.000 Yeah, oh yeah.
02:09:15.000 Looks pretty uniform.
02:09:16.000 What drove me crazy is I saw a video, when we were talking about it on Flagrant, you're looking at stuff, right?
02:09:20.000 You're researching, and there was a video of her being like, all I can do is laugh about it now.
02:09:23.000 That's all I can do.
02:09:25.000 So then someone made a joke, that's your opportunity to laugh about it, but you just took it so poorly.
02:09:29.000 Well, she just rolled her eyes, gave sideways face, and then Will, whatever's wrong with them, that's what it was.
02:09:37.000 Like, whatever he's trying to prove to her, whatever chaos is in that relationship, and maybe it is alopecia.
02:09:44.000 Maybe it's like that's just so sensitive that he realized, fuck, I gotta go slap him.
02:09:50.000 It's like the hot button topic around the house.
02:09:52.000 She's losing her hair.
02:09:53.000 I don't know.
02:09:54.000 But either way, what a terrible decision.
02:09:57.000 Yeah.
02:09:58.000 And also, it showed you how vacant Hollywood is.
02:10:03.000 That they gave him a standing ovation just moments afterwards.
02:10:07.000 Insane!
02:10:07.000 Insane!
02:10:07.000 For playing a guy who there are abuse allegations around.
02:10:11.000 Yeah.
02:10:12.000 Richard Williams.
02:10:13.000 Yeah.
02:10:13.000 Yeah.
02:10:14.000 Crazy.
02:10:15.000 Yeah.
02:10:15.000 Just what a crazy fucking thing.
02:10:17.000 Yeah.
02:10:17.000 Just the whole thing was nuts.
02:10:19.000 And it just showed how insane Hollywood is.
02:10:21.000 How disconnected they are.
02:10:23.000 And then it took the next day or so for the rest of the world to be like, hey...
02:10:27.000 What the fuck?
02:10:28.000 Yeah.
02:10:29.000 And then it all fell apart.
02:10:30.000 Yeah.
02:10:30.000 But those dummies were willing to go along with it, like, clapping.
02:10:33.000 Yeah, that was crazy.
02:10:34.000 Even though you just smacked a guy and ruined the Oscars.
02:10:38.000 Yeah, assaulted a guy who's, what, half a foot shorter than you, maybe?
02:10:41.000 And weighs eight pounds.
02:10:42.000 Yeah.
02:10:43.000 Chris Rock's the least intimidating guy that's ever held a mic.
02:10:48.000 Well, I have something to say about that.
02:10:50.000 I think you might fuck him up.
02:10:51.000 Really?
02:10:51.000 I think so.
02:10:52.000 Okay, fair enough.
02:10:53.000 Yeah.
02:10:54.000 I don't know.
02:10:55.000 I don't want to find out.
02:10:56.000 I don't know.
02:10:57.000 Maybe he'll get you.
02:10:58.000 But the point is, this is not a threatening guy to go up and physically assault him.
02:11:02.000 It's just crazy.
02:11:04.000 But it's just, you know, people lose their minds, man.
02:11:07.000 They lose their minds.
02:11:08.000 Yeah, I remember thinking about this in like 07. I did like a student film.
02:11:12.000 Obviously nothing.
02:11:13.000 I barely got paid anything.
02:11:14.000 But I remember I went to go get Chipotle.
02:11:17.000 And then the people freaked out.
02:11:18.000 They're like, hey, if you want something, you just tell us.
02:11:20.000 We'll go get it for you.
02:11:21.000 You don't need to...
02:11:22.000 And I remember being like, oh, I could just ask for anything I want and y'all would get it.
02:11:25.000 And they were like, yeah.
02:11:26.000 And I was like, that's crazy.
02:11:27.000 So imagine actually being famous.
02:11:28.000 Imagine being Will Smith.
02:11:30.000 No one says no to you ever.
02:11:31.000 If Will Smith was like, fly to Columbia, buy me coffee beans every day before I shoot, they would find a guy to do that.
02:11:37.000 How do you come out normal?
02:11:39.000 There's no way to be normal and healthy and all.
02:11:42.000 I can't see it in that world.
02:11:43.000 Well, you have to not participate in that.
02:11:45.000 You have to not be that guy.
02:11:47.000 You have to recognize that that's a dangerous road to go down.
02:11:50.000 You'll lose your humanity.
02:11:51.000 It's hard, though, I imagine.
02:11:52.000 And the one good thing about comedy is you will get humbled.
02:11:55.000 I will bomb at some point eventually, and it will remind me, oh, yeah, yeah, I'm not better than anybody else.
02:12:01.000 Yeah, comedy's a different animal.
02:12:03.000 It's very hard to be that cocky and be a comedian.
02:12:06.000 You get humbled.
02:12:07.000 That's one of the reasons why fighters are so nice.
02:12:09.000 Dude, I hung out with Henry Cejudo and Kelvin Gaslin that came to my shows in Tempe.
02:12:15.000 Just the best, Hank.
02:12:16.000 Every fighter's great.
02:12:18.000 Henry Cejudo's hilarious, by the way.
02:12:20.000 He's giving you shit.
02:12:21.000 He's taking shit.
02:12:22.000 He has five minutes of stand-up.
02:12:23.000 It's actually not that bad.
02:12:24.000 I kept telling him.
02:12:25.000 I was like, dude, I've seen more of your stand-up than I have your fights.
02:12:27.000 And it was pretty good.
02:12:29.000 Kelvin's just the nicest guy.
02:12:31.000 But yeah, there's a humility to...
02:12:32.000 Maybe Chris Rock got a lot more humble.
02:12:35.000 Maybe a lot of people are hoping that happens to me.
02:12:36.000 Well, Chris Rock woke up.
02:12:38.000 For sure, because Chris Rock's stand-up got better.
02:12:41.000 Yeah.
02:12:42.000 Everybody that saw him after that, like Tom Segura went to see him when he did the arena in town.
02:12:46.000 He goes, bro, he was on fire.
02:12:48.000 Really?
02:12:49.000 He goes, it was like, bring the pain, Chris Rock.
02:12:51.000 He was markedly better than he had been before.
02:12:54.000 Really?
02:12:54.000 He goes, it was amazing.
02:12:55.000 Yeah.
02:12:55.000 It was amazing, and that's what it was.
02:12:57.000 It was like he realized, like, fuck those people.
02:13:00.000 I was trying to get those people to like me.
02:13:02.000 I was trying to do movies, and I got slapped, and they applauded that guy afterwards.
02:13:06.000 That's insane, dude.
02:13:07.000 Fuck them.
02:13:07.000 Yeah.
02:13:08.000 He's too good for that gig anyway.
02:13:09.000 That gig sucks.
02:13:10.000 Yeah.
02:13:11.000 And then he had to try to go and do jokes after he got smacked.
02:13:13.000 Yeah.
02:13:14.000 Which was the worst.
02:13:15.000 Saying I'm not going to address it.
02:13:16.000 Ugh.
02:13:17.000 I mean, that is the worst.
02:13:18.000 When he tried to do material after he got smacked, the whole thing was crazy.
02:13:22.000 We're not talking about anything else, Chris.
02:13:24.000 You're my hero.
02:13:25.000 We're not talking about anything else.
02:13:26.000 Well, he didn't know what to do.
02:13:27.000 He probably never would have imagined that that would have happened.
02:13:30.000 There was a moment in the moment where he goes, Will said something, and he goes, boy, I could...
02:13:36.000 And then he just goes on and finishes giving the award.
02:13:38.000 I know why he didn't and that was the mature thing, but I wish he had just unloaded.
02:13:43.000 Yeah.
02:13:44.000 I wish he had just gone it.
02:13:45.000 Because I'm positive a thought crossed his mind and then he decided against it.
02:13:48.000 And I would love to see Chris Rock just...
02:13:50.000 I think the best thing would have been to do would be to say, no one's going to do anything about that.
02:13:56.000 Like, someone could just come up here and hit me, and you guys don't do shit?
02:13:59.000 Yeah.
02:14:00.000 And you want me to host your awards?
02:14:01.000 Yeah.
02:14:02.000 Like, say something real in the moment like that?
02:14:05.000 Yeah.
02:14:05.000 But how...
02:14:05.000 That's a Monday morning quarterback.
02:14:08.000 Yeah.
02:14:08.000 Who knows what anybody would have done.
02:14:10.000 And you risk looking like a bitch, being like, nobody's gonna help me?
02:14:13.000 Right.
02:14:13.000 Which, true, Will Smith's a big dude.
02:14:15.000 Yeah.
02:14:15.000 You're not.
02:14:16.000 But it's still...
02:14:18.000 You look like a bigger bitch getting slapped at me.
02:14:19.000 Like, are you guys not gonna do anything about this?
02:14:21.000 You look like a Karen or whatever.
02:14:22.000 Right.
02:14:23.000 Well, you can't...
02:14:23.000 I mean, it's like...
02:14:25.000 Jim Carrey said he should sue Will Smith for like $50 million, and I was like, yeah, you're on board with that.
02:14:29.000 This guy's career is forever altered because of that.
02:14:31.000 Yeah.
02:14:32.000 This guy made some of the greatest comedy specials in the history of the world, and we're going to talk about the slap right there with that, if not before that.
02:14:39.000 But the comedy, like his audiences went way up.
02:14:43.000 His ticket sales went through the roof.
02:14:45.000 Oh, that's good.
02:14:46.000 They went through the roof.
02:14:47.000 That's good.
02:14:48.000 I was talking to the people that handle his shit.
02:14:49.000 They were like, dude, it was crazy.
02:14:51.000 Really?
02:14:51.000 Everything was just selling out immediately.
02:14:53.000 That's great, at least.
02:14:53.000 Because everybody wanted to see him, and they wanted to see what he had to say.
02:14:56.000 Yeah.
02:14:56.000 And for a while, he wasn't even talking about it.
02:14:58.000 Yeah, he's...
02:14:59.000 Because Chris is smart, right?
02:15:00.000 He's not going to just come out with material right away and start talking about it.
02:15:03.000 People are going to film it and record it and tell everybody.
02:15:06.000 So he waited.
02:15:07.000 He waited until he really developed the material.
02:15:09.000 Yeah.
02:15:10.000 Really figured out what to say.
02:15:11.000 Yeah.
02:15:12.000 He is my comedy.
02:15:13.000 Him and Chappelle and...
02:15:15.000 Patrice I found when I got older, but I remember being kids and being like, oh fuck, this is what stand-up can be.
02:15:19.000 And that's a big reason I even entered stand-up in the first place.
02:15:22.000 Yeah, his first two specials were insane.
02:15:24.000 Bigger and Blacker and Bring the Pain are two of the best of all time.
02:15:27.000 Dude, Bigger and Blacker coming a year, like a year and a half after Bring the Pain, it's unbelievable how good it is.
02:15:33.000 To have...
02:15:43.000 Yeah.
02:15:44.000 Yeah.
02:15:46.000 Yeah.
02:16:00.000 Do you can imagine Sam Kinison or Richard Pryor hosting the Oscars?
02:16:04.000 Like, get the fuck out of here.
02:16:05.000 Why are you doing that?
02:16:06.000 You shouldn't be doing that anyway.
02:16:07.000 I mean, that was the path back then, right?
02:16:09.000 I think this is a little bit of Monday Morning Quarterbacking, where back then it was Eddie Murphy, do stand-up, be a legend, go do movies, be a legend, do whatever you want to after that.
02:16:17.000 And Chris was doing, the stand-up was still insane.
02:16:21.000 I think, even Never Scared, fantastic.
02:16:23.000 You watch that, you're just like, wow.
02:16:25.000 Four specials that are just like, or was it his third special?
02:16:28.000 But all just historically great.
02:16:29.000 And then you got the movies, and you got that, and now you're just like, I do whatever I want.
02:16:33.000 He was right there.
02:16:34.000 That was the path.
02:16:35.000 But the thing is, they all wanted to be in with Hollywood.
02:16:38.000 Everybody wanted a movie or a television show.
02:16:41.000 They all wanted that Hollywood money.
02:16:42.000 Because that's the only path that existed before the internet.
02:16:47.000 This is a very interesting time for media.
02:16:49.000 It's a very interesting time for what people consume.
02:16:52.000 Yeah, I think now we might not have as much fame or power or whatever, and that's fine because we get to kind of do what we want.
02:16:59.000 And that's great.
02:16:59.000 I don't know.
02:17:00.000 I think people are more famous now.
02:17:01.000 There's more guys doing arenas now than ever before.
02:17:03.000 That's true.
02:17:04.000 That's true.
02:17:04.000 Yeah, stand-ups had a real boom.
02:17:06.000 Hinchcliffe sold out Madison Square Garden two nights in a row in an hour.
02:17:09.000 I mean, Kill Tony.
02:17:10.000 I did Kill Tony after I did Rogan the first time.
02:17:13.000 I think the last time I was in Austin, but I remember watching him.
02:17:16.000 Tony and I started around the same time, and I'm watching him and Kill Tony, and I'm just like, holy fuck.
02:17:22.000 You are amazing at this.
02:17:24.000 He's the best ever.
02:17:25.000 He's the best host of those kind of shows ever.
02:17:27.000 He's so quick.
02:17:28.000 Yeah.
02:17:29.000 I took Tucker to Kill Tony.
02:17:31.000 Yeah, that moment with him and Cam Patterson was so good.
02:17:33.000 Tucker didn't even know he was going on stage.
02:17:35.000 He had no idea.
02:17:36.000 Really?
02:17:37.000 Yeah, I wasn't even going to bring him on stage.
02:17:38.000 I showed up with him.
02:17:40.000 We were having dinner.
02:17:41.000 And I said, me, him, and Lex Friedman.
02:17:44.000 And I said, do you want to see the club?
02:17:45.000 And he's like, yeah.
02:17:46.000 You guys got nothing going on tonight?
02:17:48.000 Let's go Kill Tony's there tonight.
02:17:49.000 It'd be awesome.
02:17:50.000 It's a crazy show to watch.
02:17:51.000 It's like one of the best live shows you can go see.
02:17:53.000 So we get there, we're backstage, and I text Tony, hey, I'm coming, I'm bringing Tucker Carlson.
02:17:59.000 And so we get backstage, and he texts me, and he's like, come on stage.
02:18:03.000 And I was like, really?
02:18:05.000 I go, all right.
02:18:06.000 I did it once before with Post Malone.
02:18:08.000 Post Malone had no idea he was going to be on Kill Tony.
02:18:11.000 I just brought him to the club, and then brought him right on stage.
02:18:14.000 And he was like, this is crazy!
02:18:16.000 And that's what we did with Tucker, too.
02:18:17.000 Just brought him on stage, and he goes out there, ladies and gentlemen, Joe Rogan and Tucker Carlson!
02:18:21.000 And the place went nuts, and he was great!
02:18:23.000 Yeah, he seemed really good.
02:18:24.000 The way he handled the camp thing, both of them handled that so well, I thought.
02:18:27.000 It was hilarious.
02:18:28.000 Yeah.
02:18:29.000 Oh, dude, Post was amazing.
02:18:31.000 Post is amazing.
02:18:31.000 He was great at it.
02:18:32.000 I've heard he's the nicest guy, too.
02:18:33.000 I wonder how he is in that format.
02:18:35.000 He's so sweet.
02:18:35.000 He's so sincere.
02:18:36.000 David Lucas said he looked like an unemployed crocodile hunter.
02:18:44.000 Ah, that's good.
02:18:46.000 That's good, dude.
02:18:47.000 Amazing.
02:18:48.000 Yeah.
02:18:48.000 Amazing.
02:18:49.000 And he just takes the jokes and he's good with it.
02:18:51.000 Oh, he's great.
02:18:51.000 Yeah.
02:18:52.000 He's a sweetheart of a guy.
02:18:53.000 Yeah.
02:18:53.000 Him and Jelly Roll.
02:18:55.000 Jelly Roll's been on it.
02:18:56.000 Jelly Roll is my favorite, man.
02:18:57.000 I love that guy.
02:18:58.000 Such a beautiful human being.
02:18:59.000 Truly.
02:19:00.000 Like a beautiful soul.
02:19:01.000 Him and that Mexican OT are like kindred spirits to me.
02:19:04.000 We had them both on separately on the pod and I was like, I said OT, I was like, you need to collab with that guy.
02:19:09.000 Oh, yeah.
02:19:10.000 Yeah.
02:19:11.000 That Mexican OT and Jelly Roll would be amazing.
02:19:14.000 Yeah.
02:19:15.000 And that Mexican OT's manager and I are fairly cool.
02:19:17.000 Greg, get out of Jelly Roll, dude, because that guy helped.
02:19:20.000 That'll happen.
02:19:20.000 I got Mexican OT as my intro for my special, and I didn't realize what a pain in the ass that can be.
02:19:26.000 And luckily, OT's manager, Greg, was like, we're going to get this done.
02:19:29.000 We're going to get this done.
02:19:30.000 We're going to get this done.
02:19:30.000 That's the only reason I could get it cleared from, I think, UMG or whatever the label was.
02:19:34.000 So, yeah.
02:19:35.000 But OT was also like, he hit me up afterward, like, hey man, I love the special.
02:19:38.000 I love the dance.
02:19:39.000 Thank you for using my song that way.
02:19:40.000 Just like, so sweet.
02:19:41.000 Yeah.
02:19:42.000 Like, you did me the biggest favor.
02:19:43.000 Right.
02:19:44.000 Ever.
02:19:44.000 And then to thank me is just like, what a sweet kid, man.
02:19:47.000 Yeah, he's a dope guy.
02:19:48.000 Yeah.
02:19:48.000 I like him a lot.
02:19:49.000 I like him a lot.
02:19:50.000 Also got the Texas manners.
02:19:51.000 Yes, sir.
02:19:52.000 I remember he asked us a question.
02:19:53.000 He said, may I show you something?
02:19:54.000 And I was like, what a well-mannered...
02:19:57.000 Sweet kid, man.
02:19:59.000 Yeah, who sings gangster rap.
02:20:00.000 Well, yeah, who will probably beat the shit out of you.
02:20:02.000 It's like a country flavor.
02:20:04.000 Yeah.
02:20:05.000 Country flavor to his rapping.
02:20:06.000 Yeah.
02:20:07.000 He's very unique.
02:20:08.000 Yes.
02:20:08.000 And comfortable.
02:20:09.000 Cowboy Killer was the first song that I ever heard.
02:20:11.000 Tony played it for me.
02:20:11.000 Really?
02:20:12.000 He's like, you got to hear this.
02:20:13.000 You ever heard of That Mexican OT? I'm like, no.
02:20:15.000 He played it for me.
02:20:16.000 I'm like, oh, shit.
02:20:18.000 I was like, this is good.
02:20:19.000 And then I started listening to his other stuff.
02:20:20.000 They're all bangers.
02:20:21.000 Fantastic.
02:20:21.000 Like an artist.
02:20:22.000 Yes, yeah.
02:20:23.000 Who just grew up in rap and that's what he knew and now I think he's gonna expand more and more and more.
02:20:27.000 Yeah, I love that kid.
02:20:28.000 Yeah, he's great.
02:20:29.000 And he's young too, man.
02:20:30.000 He's got a massive future.
02:20:32.000 Yeah, truly.
02:20:33.000 Mega talent.
02:20:33.000 Him and Jelly both.
02:20:34.000 Isn't that a cool thing about doing a podcast too, that you get to meet all these interesting people?
02:20:38.000 Yes, dude, yes.
02:20:38.000 The Brian Johnson guy was fascinating.
02:20:40.000 And you have these ideas of these people and then you sit down and talk with them and you're like, oh, that was completely wrong.
02:20:45.000 I guess that's probably most human beings, but you get this idea of a person and then you talk to them and you're like, wow.
02:20:50.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure.
02:20:52.000 Yeah.
02:20:52.000 But it's also like other people get that too.
02:20:55.000 Like you're doing a service for other people.
02:20:57.000 Yeah.
02:20:57.000 And it kind of like informs other people.
02:20:59.000 Like, hey, maybe I have misconceptions about people just because I see this public image and I think that's who they are.
02:21:04.000 Yeah.
02:21:05.000 It actually ties into what we were saying earlier is about like letting other people's opinions affect you.
02:21:09.000 I was listening to some podcast.
02:21:10.000 I forget what it's called.
02:21:11.000 But the guy goes, most people are very flippant with their opinions.
02:21:14.000 They just throw it out there.
02:21:15.000 Oh, I hate that guy.
02:21:16.000 I love that guy.
02:21:17.000 They don't really think much.
02:21:18.000 And then we take it so seriously, good and bad.
02:21:21.000 But most people just throw a thing out there not really being informed and they don't really care.
02:21:24.000 It's not that big a deal.
02:21:25.000 Yeah, it's just talk.
02:21:27.000 Louis C.K. told me this once.
02:21:28.000 He goes, it's just talk.
02:21:29.000 He goes, but when it's written down, it seems like it's more than just talk.
02:21:32.000 But it's kind of the same way people have always talked.
02:21:34.000 Yeah, that's true.
02:21:35.000 But if you see it written down or if you see someone saying it in a video, like, what did he say about me?
02:21:40.000 Yeah.
02:21:41.000 It's just talk.
02:21:42.000 People talk shit.
02:21:43.000 Yeah, Louis was another one.
02:21:44.000 I even said this to him.
02:21:45.000 When he was getting so much love, I was like, oh, fucking Louis.
02:21:48.000 And then we had him on the pod.
02:21:49.000 He was great.
02:21:50.000 He's obviously so smart.
02:21:51.000 But I remember even I told him that.
02:21:53.000 He was like...
02:21:54.000 A lot of the praise was overdone, and I'm sure some comics didn't like me.
02:21:58.000 I was like, I was one of them.
02:21:59.000 He was like, I don't blame you.
02:22:00.000 And I was like, what a cool, honest moment we had where I didn't have to pretend.
02:22:04.000 I think that's one of the best things about the podcasting, is talking to people and being like, oh, I had a preconceived notion of you, and you're very different than what I thought.
02:22:13.000 Yeah, we get informed the more people we talk to.
02:22:16.000 The more people we talk to and the more conversations we have, we get more informed as a human being.
02:22:21.000 I think one of the things that limits people is the access they have to other interesting people.
02:22:26.000 And I think that's also one of the things that is really exciting to people about podcasts, why they like it so much.
02:22:31.000 Because now they can listen to interesting people talk.
02:22:35.000 They can listen to cool people talk.
02:22:37.000 They kind of get in on these conversations and they see a real conversation where it's not planned out.
02:22:41.000 You don't know what you're going to talk about.
02:22:42.000 You're just talking.
02:22:43.000 Right.
02:22:44.000 Yeah.
02:22:44.000 How much prep do you do typically for interviews?
02:22:47.000 Because sometimes I'll prep for days and it's just like endless.
02:22:50.000 And then sometimes I'm like, I think I'm okay.
02:22:52.000 It completely depends on the subject matter.
02:22:55.000 Yeah.
02:22:56.000 There's been people that I've had to read books on astrophysics and string theory and try to understand what the fuck they're talking about or AI. It depends.
02:23:10.000 Some people have read their entire book and I knew they were coming on months in advance so I prepared for it.
02:23:16.000 And then other people, I'm just like, I can't wait to talk to that guy.
02:23:20.000 You know, like, that Mexican OT, zero prep.
02:23:22.000 What's up?
02:23:22.000 I love your music.
02:23:23.000 You know, it was easy.
02:23:24.000 I wanted to just get to know him in the moment.
02:23:26.000 I don't want to, like...
02:23:27.000 I heard when you were a child.
02:23:29.000 Like, no, I wanted to come out, like, organically.
02:23:32.000 I want to have a real conversation with him.
02:23:34.000 Well, you know, I'm sure you've heard this.
02:23:35.000 Larry King, like, just did no prep for any interview ever.
02:23:39.000 Really?
02:23:39.000 Yeah, there's a clip of him and Seinfeld talking.
02:23:41.000 It's so funny, where he clearly doesn't know who Seinfeld is.
02:23:45.000 This is at the height of Seinfeld's fame.
02:23:47.000 And Seinfeld is like, yeah, my show is going off the...
02:23:50.000 You've never watched an episode?
02:23:51.000 It's kind of a big deal.
02:23:53.000 And Larry's like, no, I didn't know.
02:23:56.000 And Andrew Schultz will always be like, that's just his excuse to be lazy.
02:23:59.000 But I truly think he's like, maybe.
02:24:01.000 But he was also like, I know the best, most organic conversations if I learn all about this guy right here.
02:24:06.000 And my skill set will allow for the best interview to happen that way.
02:24:09.000 Well, the worst conversations are conversations that are canned, right?
02:24:13.000 Where when someone's talking to you, they don't really care.
02:24:16.000 But they're pretending they care and asking you these things because they have like bullet points that they want to hit.
02:24:21.000 Those seem canned.
02:24:23.000 They seem bullshit.
02:24:25.000 You're probably better off doing it the Larry King way with some stuff, but Larry King didn't interview theoretical physicists.
02:24:33.000 I need to know something about what you're talking about to be able to have my own questions.
02:24:41.000 Because there's some things that are so nuanced and they're so complicated that you should have some understanding of them before you talk about it.
02:24:51.000 But then, other times, it's like, oh, guy's a comic.
02:24:54.000 You know, like, let's talk.
02:24:56.000 That'd be easy.
02:24:57.000 I love comics.
02:24:58.000 Let's talk some shit.
02:25:00.000 How do you write?
02:25:00.000 What do you do?
02:25:01.000 How do you do it?
02:25:02.000 Where'd you start?
02:25:03.000 I want to know.
02:25:04.000 And having genuine curiosity, that's a major key.
02:25:10.000 It's like, actually be curious.
02:25:12.000 And some people aren't really curious.
02:25:13.000 They really just want to wait for their turn to talk.
02:25:15.000 They can't wait.
02:25:16.000 When's it going to be my turn to talk?
02:25:20.000 But you ruin your own show that way.
02:25:22.000 Even by being selfish, you're actually going against yourself.
02:25:27.000 You're not realizing it at the time, but you're actually poisoning your own show by being selfish.
02:25:34.000 Yeah, the best thing that I've learned in life is try to actually listen.
02:25:38.000 Especially, and the more nervous you are, like, even this pod, I come on, I'm like, just try to listen and respond to what he's saying in the moment, and just stay in your own body and do that.
02:25:48.000 With everything, man.
02:25:50.000 With other people, too.
02:25:51.000 Like, when I'm, you know, hanging out with someone, Just a regular person.
02:25:55.000 I'm so much better at talking to people now than I was before I did a podcast.
02:26:00.000 Because I'm so much better at not talking over someone, waiting for them to talk, trying to get the most out of what they're trying to say.
02:26:08.000 Instead of just listening and then just me talking, trying to figure out how did you come to that conclusion?
02:26:15.000 Did you always think that way?
02:26:16.000 What did you learn?
02:26:18.000 How did you learn this stuff?
02:26:19.000 What inspired you to start doing that?
02:26:22.000 It's like that.
02:26:24.000 That's interesting to me.
02:26:26.000 So now when I have conversations with people that suck at having conversations, I can't wait.
02:26:30.000 I got trapped at my fucking club by a buddy of mine brought one of his buddies from high school.
02:26:36.000 And his buddy from high school was drunk and he's rich.
02:26:40.000 And he kept wanting to tell me about this business that he started.
02:26:45.000 It was, you know, blah, blah, blah, and this and that, and I turned it into a $100 million business, and this and that.
02:26:51.000 I'm just telling you, just so you know who I am.
02:26:53.000 So, like, oh my god, he was so bad at talking.
02:26:57.000 It was just the clunkiest, shittiest, braggiest.
02:27:01.000 And then I eventually go, I gotta go.
02:27:03.000 I wasn't even talking.
02:27:04.000 I was like, you're just talking at me.
02:27:05.000 Like, I don't care about any of these things.
02:27:06.000 He just needed to impress you that badly.
02:27:08.000 Yeah, he needed to let me know that he was successful.
02:27:10.000 Yeah.
02:27:11.000 And I mean, within seconds of meeting him, he's telling me all this stuff.
02:27:14.000 It's exhausting.
02:27:15.000 So I used to get really irritated at that stuff.
02:27:18.000 And then I think what Schultz said to me one time, because this kid at a diner started interrupting our conversation and telling us about his education and how smart he was.
02:27:26.000 And then I was so annoyed when we left.
02:27:30.000 And Andrew was like, yeah, but you got to feel good about yourself that that guy, for whatever reason, felt insecure around you and felt he needed to impress you that much.
02:27:38.000 Right.
02:27:38.000 Well, it's when someone knows someone from something, right?
02:27:41.000 If they know you and you don't know them, they need to let you know they're a big deal.
02:27:45.000 Yeah, and it's just insecurity, and it's like, I used to take it as malicious, and now I'm like, oh, that guy, I'm not great at it, but I try to remind myself, oh, that guy is meeting probably, he's probably listened to you thousands of hours in his head, and he wants so badly for you to like him,
02:28:00.000 and he just doesn't know how to do that, and he doesn't know, hey, if I just have a real conversation with Joe, he'll walk away being like, that's a nice guy.
02:28:06.000 And then he just overcompensates with, let me impress him because I did all these things and show him what I've done.
02:28:11.000 And there's like, oh, okay.
02:28:13.000 Well, I feel bad for that guy a little bit.
02:28:15.000 I'm not great at it by any stretch, but that's what I try to remember.
02:28:17.000 You definitely should feel bad for him because it sucks to be that guy.
02:28:19.000 It has to do that.
02:28:20.000 And it doesn't feel good.
02:28:21.000 That never works.
02:28:23.000 No one ever walks away going, that guy's amazing.
02:28:25.000 You walk out of there, ugh.
02:28:27.000 It feels like that guy just jizzed all over me.
02:28:30.000 It's really what it's like.
02:28:31.000 Did you know that guy's worth $100 million?
02:28:33.000 You know what else doesn't work that people still do?
02:28:35.000 Is name dropping.
02:28:37.000 Does that shit work at all?
02:28:38.000 No, no, no, that's a rough one.
02:28:39.000 Who does that work on?
02:28:40.000 That's a rough one.
02:28:41.000 We were partying with Leo, and you're like, what?
02:28:43.000 What are we doing?
02:28:44.000 What?
02:28:45.000 Yeah, please, please don't, dude.
02:28:47.000 Please, please don't do that to me.
02:28:49.000 I couldn't care less.
02:28:50.000 I couldn't care less.
02:28:52.000 Does it work on anybody?
02:28:53.000 It might be one of the least effective strategies for getting people to think you're cool.
02:28:57.000 Name dropping?
02:28:58.000 No, yeah.
02:28:59.000 I think it works on people who don't know anyone.
02:29:02.000 And they're like, oh, this guy knows so-and-so.
02:29:04.000 But even after about the third name, you're like, oh, he doesn't know anybody.
02:29:07.000 The more names you name, the less those people like you.
02:29:10.000 Yeah.
02:29:10.000 People turn on you, too.
02:29:12.000 If you're that guy that name drops like on podcasts or a name, people are like, eww.
02:29:18.000 Yeah.
02:29:19.000 Eww.
02:29:20.000 If you're the guy who talks over everybody, eww.
02:29:22.000 Yeah.
02:29:22.000 I used to do it way more.
02:29:24.000 Like early podcast.
02:29:25.000 I just wasn't good at it.
02:29:26.000 So you have a thought in your head.
02:29:27.000 You just want to get it out.
02:29:28.000 Right.
02:29:29.000 Even if you're not even being selfish, it's like you're just looking for a chance to...
02:29:33.000 And then it took me time to just look at the big picture of it and go, this is not smart.
02:29:38.000 And then that's when I started using pads, too.
02:29:41.000 This is big, too.
02:29:41.000 Because sometimes I have a thing.
02:29:43.000 I'm like, oh, my God, I'm going to forget this while this guy's on this ramp.
02:29:45.000 So I just look over here, scribble, and write it down.
02:29:48.000 And if I do that, I'm good.
02:29:50.000 Yeah.
02:29:52.000 It's a skill.
02:29:53.000 It's a skill like any other skill.
02:29:56.000 You learn how to negotiate a conversation and get the most out of the person.
02:30:01.000 I want that person to shine.
02:30:03.000 I want them to have the most interesting thing that they could say.
02:30:07.000 I want to help them say it.
02:30:09.000 I think about that because I don't feel nearly as confident in podcasting as I do in stand-up and then I just remember, oh, stand-up is something I've been doing 17 years now or whatever.
02:30:18.000 Podcasting I've been doing 5, 6, whatever.
02:30:21.000 Like, it's gonna take a while.
02:30:22.000 Also, you guys have a unique setup when there's a lot of folks there.
02:30:25.000 Yeah.
02:30:26.000 You know, there's four of you.
02:30:27.000 Yeah.
02:30:28.000 And then there's a guest.
02:30:29.000 Yeah.
02:30:29.000 When you got five people talking and no one knows when they can chime in and when they should chime in, it's hard.
02:30:35.000 Yeah, being a team player is big.
02:30:37.000 I could try to get my thought out now, but if I'm just going to be talking with everybody, is that going to add to the best podcast or do I just fall back and wait?
02:30:47.000 Headphones.
02:30:48.000 Headphones are a huge key because then you don't talk over each other.
02:30:52.000 Overtalk is terrible to listen to.
02:30:54.000 Yeah.
02:30:54.000 You know, like Ari, when he comes on the podcast, we do Protect Our Parks.
02:30:57.000 As soon as he gets drunk, takes the headphones off, starts talking over everybody.
02:31:00.000 Like, Ari!
02:31:01.000 You can't have two separate conversations.
02:31:02.000 This is a podcast.
02:31:03.000 Millions of people are going to hear this.
02:31:05.000 Oh, I need to give Ari his flowers, too.
02:31:06.000 Jew is...
02:31:08.000 Amazing.
02:31:08.000 It was one of the big...
02:31:11.000 I looked at that and I was like, oh, this guy didn't shop this at a streamer.
02:31:14.000 He just put it online and it looks better than pretty much anything I've seen on Netflix.
02:31:18.000 It was cool because of all the candles and shit.
02:31:20.000 Yeah, a gorgeous special.
02:31:21.000 I told him this.
02:31:22.000 I was like, this is...
02:31:23.000 Once I saw that, I was like, oh, this is the bar now.
02:31:26.000 That's what's...
02:31:27.000 It's set there.
02:31:28.000 Well, it was also for me, it was very important to see because Ari had been telling me these things for decades and had never figured out a way to do it on stage and decided to do it all in one special.
02:31:40.000 Yeah.
02:31:41.000 Because he was telling me all this stuff about his upbringing because he had a crazy upbringing, man.
02:31:45.000 Yeah.
02:31:45.000 Like super religious, went to Israel, stayed in a kibbutz or whatever the fuck it was and read the Talmud all day.
02:31:53.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:31:53.000 He was all in.
02:31:54.000 And then he's like, this is bullshit.
02:31:56.000 What am I doing?
02:31:57.000 And then he becomes a comic, which is wild.
02:31:59.000 And when I met him, it was like, I guess it was the 90s, and he was like, maybe one year did Ari start working at the store.
02:32:08.000 It might have, I think I was on, that might have been Fear Factor days, I don't remember.
02:32:12.000 But it was like, he was a young, young guy who was just starting to do stand-up, and then the more I got to know him, I'm like, what did you do?
02:32:20.000 Yeah.
02:32:21.000 Wow!
02:32:22.000 I'm like, why don't you talk about that on stage?
02:32:23.000 He just didn't have the chops.
02:32:25.000 Yeah.
02:32:26.000 And so it took a decade plus, two decades, before he developed the chops to be a real solid state.
02:32:32.000 And I'm glad he did.
02:32:33.000 Because then he became a great comic.
02:32:35.000 And then he realized how to do that material as a comic.
02:32:39.000 Yeah.
02:32:40.000 Which was perfect.
02:32:40.000 Yeah, I think that's one thing.
02:32:42.000 I used to try to push myself to do this material that was personal.
02:32:44.000 Like, I hope I can make my dad's story into a bit or something to end a special with or whatever.
02:32:49.000 But now I realize I don't need to push.
02:32:51.000 I wasn't good enough to do that back then.
02:32:53.000 And now as I'm getting better, I think I can dig deeper, be more honest, be more personal, tell more personal things or whatever, and then I'm ready now, I feel like.
02:33:01.000 Yeah, you can figure out a way to make it good.
02:33:03.000 Yes.
02:33:04.000 Yeah, it's a tricky job, man.
02:33:06.000 Yeah.
02:33:06.000 It's a tricky fucking slippery job.
02:33:08.000 Especially like somewhat potentially painful things that you're trying to make funny.
02:33:12.000 I remember I would see some comics come up and be just so awkward, say all these horrible things they went through, and they'd be like...
02:33:17.000 I don't care if y'all laugh, this is therapy for me.
02:33:19.000 And I know you're just saying that because you're nervous, because you're not doing well, but you gotta understand how fundamentally wrong, this is not therapy.
02:33:26.000 We're not here to help you through this.
02:33:28.000 Go to therapy, make it funny, and then come bring it to us.
02:33:31.000 I remember there was some dispute at Just for Laughs, and some comic yelled at some other comic that if you're not using your comedy to promote social justice, you can go fuck yourself.
02:33:38.000 Oh, Jesus Christ, dude.
02:33:39.000 That is hilarious.
02:33:40.000 That's a person that can't possibly be good.
02:33:42.000 There's no way you're good.
02:33:43.000 You must be terrible on stage.
02:33:45.000 Your comedy must be awful.
02:33:47.000 I think you also, that's probably a young comic, probably, because I know I had these ideas of what funny was.
02:33:51.000 And I remember watching, I think it was called Talking Funny or Funny People or whatever, with Ricky Gervais, Chris Rock, Louis C.K., and Jerry Seinfeld.
02:33:59.000 And then there's a moment where Ricky, who's the youngest comic in the room, is talking about these jokes and, like, I don't want to do those jokes because those jokes are easy.
02:34:06.000 I want to impress guys like you.
02:34:08.000 And then Jerry goes, you know what would impress me?
02:34:10.000 Leave that joke in.
02:34:12.000 Don't take that joke out.
02:34:13.000 Leave that stupid joke in.
02:34:14.000 I'm impressed.
02:34:15.000 Just kill.
02:34:16.000 I like stupid jokes.
02:34:18.000 Yes.
02:34:19.000 Like, Attell.
02:34:21.000 Attell's brilliant and silly at the same time.
02:34:23.000 Amazing.
02:34:24.000 These aren't like super complicated jokes where you're like, oh my god, this guy's changing the world.
02:34:29.000 Thousand percent.
02:34:30.000 Amazing.
02:34:30.000 Thousand percent.
02:34:31.000 I just want to laugh.
02:34:32.000 Just make us laugh.
02:34:33.000 That's your job.
02:34:34.000 Just make us laugh.
02:34:34.000 And then if you can make us laugh on your terms the way you want to, God bless.
02:34:38.000 That's a better level, sure.
02:34:40.000 Sure.
02:34:41.000 But is shooing laughs just because I don't want to...
02:34:44.000 No.
02:34:45.000 Fuck that.
02:34:45.000 Get the laughs.
02:34:46.000 You're only doing that because you can't get laughs.
02:34:47.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:34:48.000 That's it.
02:34:49.000 Anybody who's trying to educate these people, bro, you're 28 years old.
02:34:52.000 You live in a duplex.
02:34:53.000 Shut the fuck up.
02:34:54.000 Shut the fuck up.
02:34:56.000 You're not going to fix the world.
02:34:57.000 I know you think you're going to.
02:34:58.000 But also, that was a thing that Hicks brought to comedy that was a real problem in the 90s.
02:35:03.000 Yeah, I hated Hicks for a long time because of this.
02:35:06.000 I still won't listen to Hicks just because the ripple effect of Bill Hicks is like, buddy, you created a monster.
02:35:11.000 He did create a monster.
02:35:13.000 There were so many fucking people that wanted to be Hicks.
02:35:15.000 Yeah.
02:35:15.000 It was so much so that the Punchline in Atlanta used to have a green room, and on the back of the green room, people would write on the wall, and it said, quit trying to be Hicks.
02:35:23.000 Oh, thank God.
02:35:24.000 Bad message.
02:35:24.000 And when they tore that down, Jamie, the owner, kept saying he was going to get me that fucking, because they took the wood down.
02:35:31.000 Yeah.
02:35:31.000 I'm like, get me that.
02:35:32.000 Yeah, just the plank that says, don't be Hicks.
02:35:34.000 Just quit trying to be Hicks.
02:35:36.000 Let me put that up here.
02:35:37.000 Yeah.
02:35:38.000 Because I remember that.
02:35:39.000 Like, ah, there's so many guys.
02:35:40.000 So many guys who wanted to be that guy.
02:35:43.000 You know, because he just left you feeling like, even Richard Jenny, who's like one of the all-time greats.
02:35:49.000 I remember Richard Jenny saw Hicks, and he was like, ah, I watched him.
02:35:53.000 I was like, I got to do more stuff like that.
02:35:55.000 Yeah.
02:35:56.000 But you don't.
02:35:57.000 Yeah.
02:35:57.000 You really don't.
02:35:58.000 I actually remember though, God, who's the comic?
02:36:01.000 His name is escaping me.
02:36:02.000 He's a clean comic.
02:36:02.000 He's massive, super funny.
02:36:04.000 Brian Regan.
02:36:04.000 He was saying, he was on somebody else's podcast and that guy was saying about Brian Regan, I remember Hicks was really dying to go see you at X, Y, and Z. So Hicks loves Brian Regan.
02:36:14.000 Yeah.
02:36:15.000 So you don't need to be Hicks.
02:36:16.000 Just be funny and Hicks will be looking down and being like, that guy's funny.
02:36:20.000 Well, Hicks really was that guy.
02:36:22.000 Yeah.
02:36:22.000 Like Hicks was talking about stuff in the 90s before the internet, right?
02:36:26.000 So he's talking about all these really esoteric subjects and interesting things because he was just reading a lot.
02:36:31.000 Yeah.
02:36:31.000 So it was like real, he really understood what he was talking about.
02:36:35.000 Yeah.
02:36:36.000 That's actually that guy.
02:36:37.000 If you're not that guy, don't be that guy.
02:36:39.000 It's just be who you are.
02:36:40.000 But people like that, like, you know, occasionally someone will come along and they influence everybody.
02:36:47.000 You know, Kinison for sure did that.
02:36:48.000 They come along and they're so mind-blowing.
02:36:50.000 You're like, Jesus Christ.
02:36:52.000 You know, Joey Diaz influenced everybody around him.
02:36:54.000 Because everybody, like, he was so quick with his punchlines.
02:36:59.000 The setup punchline was so fast, rapid fire.
02:37:01.000 He got to it so quick.
02:37:03.000 Like, God damn, I've got to pick up my speed.
02:37:05.000 I've got to pick up my game.
02:37:07.000 Is that what you picked up from him?
02:37:08.000 I learned a lot from Joey, for sure.
02:37:10.000 I learned a lot from also having to follow him because I would bring Joey on the road with him because I couldn't follow him.
02:37:16.000 So I was like, this is the best way to figure out how to follow this guy.
02:37:19.000 Bring him with me everywhere.
02:37:20.000 He was fucking killing.
02:37:21.000 He was killing.
02:37:22.000 And also, I wanted to laugh.
02:37:24.000 Yeah.
02:37:24.000 You know, and when you're around Joey, it's just a party.
02:37:26.000 He's unbelievable.
02:37:27.000 He's awesome.
02:37:27.000 He's the best.
02:37:28.000 Yeah, we had him on the pod once and I was like, this guy is awesome.
02:37:30.000 He was just here for 420 weekend.
02:37:32.000 It was fucking glorious.
02:37:33.000 It was amazing.
02:37:34.000 He's on fire.
02:37:35.000 Because he comes to the club and he gets so much love that he's so free and loose.
02:37:39.000 Oh, yeah.
02:37:39.000 The moments when he went on stage, it was incredible.
02:37:43.000 Because the audience didn't know he was there unless they had paid attention to the Instagram.
02:37:47.000 So Friday night, they definitely didn't know he was there.
02:37:49.000 When I do those Joe Rogan and Friends shows, I don't let anybody know.
02:37:53.000 So Schultz will bop in.
02:37:54.000 Shane Gillis shows up.
02:37:56.000 Yeah, yeah.
02:37:57.000 Gaffigan shows up.
02:37:58.000 No one knows who's gonna be there.
02:38:00.000 And they go up there and everybody's like, this is crazy!
02:38:02.000 Yeah, yeah.
02:38:02.000 You know, that's what's fun about it.
02:38:04.000 And so when Joey goes up, they didn't know who it was gonna be.
02:38:07.000 And then Joey Diaz, everybody went, yeah!
02:38:10.000 Is he thinking about moving here or no?
02:38:12.000 Yeah, we're working on him.
02:38:13.000 That's great.
02:38:13.000 We're working on him.
02:38:14.000 That's great.
02:38:15.000 We'll get him eventually.
02:38:15.000 He's gonna love it.
02:38:16.000 He's just too happy here.
02:38:17.000 And the problem with New Jersey is, it's like there's too much road bullshit, hacky fucking comedy there.
02:38:24.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:38:25.000 I mean, there's good comics in New Jersey for sure.
02:38:27.000 There's great comics.
02:38:28.000 Boss lives in Jersey.
02:38:29.000 Bonnie McFarlane lives in Jersey.
02:38:30.000 There's great comics in New Jersey, no doubt about it.
02:38:32.000 But there's also a lot of scrubs and a lot of like just real – just dumb comedy.
02:38:38.000 Just dumb.
02:38:39.000 I was at the mothership yesterday and I'm watching this open mic and just seeing all the comics.
02:38:44.000 First of all, I remembered I don't miss open mics at all.
02:38:46.000 I just remembered that pain of sitting there waiting.
02:38:49.000 It's horrible.
02:38:49.000 But I was thinking, I was like, yo, Joe fucking did it, man.
02:38:54.000 He made this...
02:38:55.000 I was thinking, if I'm a young comic...
02:38:58.000 Austin wasn't even a place I was thinking of in 2007 or 8 or whatever when I started.
02:39:03.000 Now, LA is not even a place I'm thinking of.
02:39:05.000 It's either Austin or New York.
02:39:07.000 And Austin is easier to survive.
02:39:08.000 It's better weather.
02:39:09.000 It's nicer people.
02:39:11.000 I think I would come to Austin.
02:39:12.000 It's also a more supportive environment because the environment, especially at our club, is specifically designed to foster talent.
02:39:20.000 It's designed that way.
02:39:21.000 There's two nights of open mic nights.
02:39:23.000 It's designed.
02:39:24.000 Kill Tony's there.
02:39:25.000 It's designed for that.
02:39:26.000 Right, right, right.
02:39:27.000 So from the ground up, you have a chance to go.
02:39:31.000 You have a chance as a person who's just getting on stage the first time ever to go up in the best club in the world.
02:39:36.000 Yeah.
02:39:37.000 And you have a chance to go and work the same stage that Joey Diaz goes up in, that Dave Chappelle went up in.
02:39:43.000 Yeah.
02:39:43.000 You get to go into that, the little boy, that room is amazing.
02:39:47.000 Yeah.
02:39:47.000 That is a tight little room, man.
02:39:49.000 Yeah, yeah.
02:39:49.000 And you could get that itch.
02:39:51.000 Little boy felt like the belly room.
02:39:54.000 It's like the belly room and the OR had a baby.
02:39:57.000 Yeah.
02:39:57.000 And the fat man is like the main room and the OR had a baby.
02:40:03.000 Okay, I see that.
02:40:04.000 Yeah, that's what it is.
02:40:04.000 It's a perfect place.
02:40:05.000 Yeah.
02:40:05.000 I mean, I was hyped.
02:40:07.000 I've always said Comedy Orcs is the best club in the country in Denver.
02:40:10.000 Still love it.
02:40:10.000 I just got back from there this weekend.
02:40:12.000 Amazing.
02:40:12.000 I am excited to kill Tony, and then I'm excited to see...
02:40:15.000 This is my first time in Austin since you built the club, so I'm excited to see the whole thing.
02:40:18.000 It's a wild place.
02:40:20.000 How many days are you in town?
02:40:21.000 How many days?
02:40:22.000 You want me to be in town.
02:40:23.000 Do you know what I mean?
02:40:24.000 You decide.
02:40:24.000 Come by tomorrow.
02:40:25.000 Do a set tomorrow night.
02:40:26.000 Okay.
02:40:26.000 Absolutely.
02:40:26.000 Done.
02:40:27.000 Done.
02:40:27.000 I got a show tomorrow at 7 o'clock.
02:40:29.000 But we got, I mean, we have big name headliners are coming in every weekend, which is great.
02:40:34.000 So the local guys get to see the people that are there.
02:40:37.000 And all the door staff, they're all comics.
02:40:40.000 They audition with their act.
02:40:42.000 So it's like a development process.
02:40:44.000 Like the store was, but more organized.
02:40:46.000 Not as chaotic.
02:40:48.000 And run by a comedian.
02:40:49.000 And run by a comedian that doesn't have business partners.
02:40:53.000 I don't have anybody else.
02:40:54.000 And you don't rely on that for income.
02:40:58.000 Exactly.
02:40:59.000 It's a mitzvah.
02:41:01.000 It had to have happened the way it happened.
02:41:03.000 There had to be this crazy moment in history where the whole country gets shut down except Texas.
02:41:10.000 And so we move here and all of a sudden I'm doing shows with Chappelle, we're doing these outdoor shows, everybody's getting tested.
02:41:17.000 And then we started doing indoor shows.
02:41:19.000 And then we started doing indoor shows.
02:41:20.000 I'm like, I gotta open up a club.
02:41:23.000 We need a hangout.
02:41:24.000 We had the Vulcan, which is a great place.
02:41:27.000 Vulcan's a great club.
02:41:27.000 Vulcan's awesome.
02:41:28.000 I did the Vulcan right after you came on Flagrant the next day.
02:41:31.000 That was the last time I was in Austin.
02:41:32.000 It's a great club.
02:41:33.000 Vulcan's great.
02:41:34.000 It's a great club to kill in, too.
02:41:36.000 But I was like, this isn't ours.
02:41:38.000 They have techno music there, EDM some nights.
02:41:43.000 We need to set something up.
02:41:45.000 And I had...
02:41:46.000 That's Spotify money.
02:41:48.000 And I'm like, listen, if anybody's gonna do it, it's gotta be me.
02:41:50.000 And if there's a time to do it, it's now.
02:41:53.000 Because people were willing to move so that they could go on stage.
02:41:57.000 Because LA shut everything down for so long that so many comics are like, you guys are doing shows?
02:42:03.000 And then guys like Derek and Hassan, they came out there early.
02:42:06.000 Brian Simpson, he came out there early.
02:42:09.000 Derek Poston is so goddamn funny.
02:42:11.000 He's getting so good, dude.
02:42:12.000 He's getting so good.
02:42:13.000 I saw him before Mothership, because I saw him host Andrew's show.
02:42:16.000 He's a good host.
02:42:17.000 He's a good host.
02:42:18.000 And I was like, oh, I'll bring him on the road.
02:42:19.000 And then I thought, you know, one thing I try to do to pay forward how Schultz helped me is that once I get to know you and I think I know how you're funny, I'm like, hey, well, let's watch your set if you want, and I'll see if I can give you some advice.
02:42:30.000 I'm not the end-all be-all, but I'll try to help you how I can.
02:42:33.000 So I had Derek feature one show, and then I watched the set, and I was like, buddy, I barely got, I got some tags for you.
02:42:38.000 But I don't see, like, structurally, oh, you could do this, you could do X, Y, Z. You're so fucking funny.
02:42:44.000 Unbelievable.
02:42:45.000 Well, the level of the guys coming up is very high.
02:42:49.000 And there's also, in Austin, there's so many places to perform.
02:42:53.000 Just on the block where the mothership is.
02:42:55.000 So you have the Mothership right down the street.
02:42:57.000 You have the Sunset Strip Club.
02:42:59.000 You have Brian Redband's Club.
02:43:00.000 Right over there you have the Creek in the Cave.
02:43:02.000 Right over there you have the Vulcan.
02:43:03.000 You have the Velveeta Room.
02:43:05.000 There's someplace called the Green Room.
02:43:06.000 Then you have Cap City.
02:43:07.000 You have a bunch of different clubs on the east side.
02:43:10.000 There's like hipster clubs and lesbian shows.
02:43:13.000 And there's like fucking comedies everywhere.
02:43:16.000 Dude, you have made this a comedy hub.
02:43:18.000 It's a marvelous thing.
02:43:19.000 Like an insane thing that you've done.
02:43:21.000 It's pretty wild.
02:43:22.000 It's insane.
02:43:23.000 To move LA over to Austin is crazy.
02:43:26.000 But make it better.
02:43:27.000 Yeah.
02:43:28.000 Make it better.
02:43:28.000 Truly.
02:43:29.000 And make it completely disconnected from all those people that'll poison your act with their fucking Hollywood bullshit.
02:43:34.000 And actually, I said LA. To be honest, I meant New York.
02:43:37.000 This is what I heard New York was.
02:43:38.000 When I went to New York, it wasn't friendly, but you'd have to pay to go to most open mics.
02:43:44.000 $5.
02:43:44.000 And the free open mics, this is when the alt scene was kind of running things.
02:43:47.000 So if you talked about anything that wasn't like a video game or anime, they would judge the fuck out of it and be brutal.
02:43:52.000 There was no support built in.
02:43:54.000 So you've taken the best parts of New York and brought it to Austin.
02:43:57.000 And again, a city that's much cheaper and much less harsh.
02:44:01.000 Being poor in New York is rough.
02:44:03.000 Being poor in Austin, it's not that bad.
02:44:05.000 It's not bad.
02:44:06.000 You can get around.
02:44:07.000 Traffic's not bad at all.
02:44:09.000 It's very light.
02:44:10.000 It's very easy.
02:44:10.000 And the people are cool.
02:44:12.000 And the traffic, the clubs is all, like you said, all this little radius.
02:44:17.000 LA, if I want to hit three spots, I'm driving three, four hours.
02:44:20.000 Well, you can go to the improv.
02:44:21.000 You can go to the Laugh Factory.
02:44:22.000 It's not that.
02:44:23.000 If you're doing the store, improv.
02:44:24.000 If you're in at all three, but when I started in LA, open mics, you're driving all over the place.
02:44:29.000 Yeah, yeah.
02:44:30.000 It's all spread out.
02:44:30.000 Yeah, if you're doing open mics, you're fucked.
02:44:32.000 There's not a lot of open mics in LA. I mean, there's a good amount, but not in comparison to the amount of comics.
02:44:38.000 Yeah.
02:44:38.000 There's a lot of comics and a lot of wannabe comics.
02:44:41.000 And there's also, in LA, you have those people that really want to be actors.
02:44:44.000 Yes.
02:44:44.000 And they think that, like...
02:44:45.000 This is their platform.
02:44:46.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:44:47.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:44:49.000 Yeah.
02:44:49.000 Yeah.
02:44:50.000 Anyway, brother, great to have you on.
02:44:52.000 Thank you so much.
02:44:52.000 Tell everybody about your special, whether they can get your second special.
02:44:55.000 Second special is Gaslit.
02:44:57.000 It's on YouTube right now.
02:44:59.000 I'm very proud of it.
02:45:00.000 I think hopefully this is my next evolution as a comic and just making the things I truly believe funny instead of just doing contrarians.
02:45:07.000 Oh, look at this opening.
02:45:07.000 This is dope.
02:45:07.000 Yeah, dude.
02:45:08.000 I try to do it big.
02:45:09.000 Oh, look at this man.
02:45:10.000 So this is traditional Indian dance called Bharat Natyam.
02:45:12.000 It's a South Indian dance.
02:45:14.000 And then it's to that Mexican OT. Oh, that's amazing.
02:45:18.000 So, yeah.
02:45:22.000 Yeah.
02:45:22.000 Yeah.
02:45:24.000 So, check it out on YouTube.
02:45:27.000 Please support.
02:45:28.000 Check it out.
02:45:28.000 Thank you guys so much.
02:45:28.000 Thank you, Joe.
02:45:29.000 My pleasure, brother.
02:45:30.000 Tell everybody your social media.
02:45:32.000 Oh, it's Akash Singh, A-K-A-A-S-H. Akash Singh Comedy on TikTok.
02:45:37.000 Everything else is pretty much Akash Singh.
02:45:38.000 Oh, and YouTube is Akash Singh Comedy.
02:45:39.000 All right.
02:45:40.000 Thank you so much, man.
02:45:41.000 My pleasure.
02:45:41.000 See you tomorrow night.
02:45:42.000 All right.
02:45:42.000 Bye, everybody.