In this episode of The Joe Rogan Experience, Joe and Chad talk about Google listening to him on his phone at all hours of the day and night. They also talk about how much money is being stolen from you by companies like Columbia Records and National Geographic, and why you should stop listening to them. Also, they talk about the fact that you should be paying taxes on your music streaming service and why it sucks that you're paying for it. Joe also talks about why he doesn't want to get into music streaming services and why he thinks it's a bad idea. It's a good thing you're not listening to it if you don't pay taxes on it, because you're going to get a lot of free stuff from them too! Joe is a podcaster, comedian, writer, podcaster and podcaster. He's been in the entertainment business for a long time and is a regular contributor to the New York Times, NPR, and many other media outlets. He's also the host of the radio show The Jerks and hosts a podcast called The J.R.O.V.P. Show on Comedy Central's Morning Show. Check it out! And be sure to subscribe to it on Apple Podcasts and subscribe on your favorite streaming platform so you won't miss out on the latest episodes! If you like what you hear, share it with a friend or become a supporter of the show by becoming a patron! and/or share it on social media using the hashtag or tag him on Insta-Friendship . Thanks for listening and supporting the show! :) Cheers, Cheers! Cheers. - Cheers - Joe and Joe Timestamps: 8:00:00 9:00 - 11:30 - 8:15 - 11:00 | 12:15 | 13:00 / 16:30 | 15:30 17:15 18:00 +16:00 // 17:00 & 17:10 | 18:30 // 18:10 19:40 | 19:00/16:40 21:15 // 21:30 / 22:30 & 23:40 // 22:40 / 23:35 25:40 & 26:00 @ 26:40 @ 27:40 +33:30 @ 35:00 ?
00:00:29.000But I was having a conversation with my wife about purses, and she was explaining to me that certain purses, like, you can't just buy the purse.
00:00:35.000You have to develop a relationship with a store owner.
00:02:19.000I think they're probably the best about that because they're the first company that actually stepped in and said, we're going to stop companies from being able to share your information.
00:04:02.000They could say they sold, you know, millions and millions of records.
00:04:06.000I also think it was probably a way that they could rip artists off Because they could say, we lost all this money on Columbia.
00:04:13.000They could factor it in and say, I know it seems like you sold a million copies, but actually 400,000 of them are Columbia, and nobody's paid for them.
00:04:39.000Like, he was, like, getting some house built.
00:04:41.000I remember it was, like, the most extravagant house.
00:04:43.000He had, like, this super expensive marble that was being brought in, and, you know, and then they just, I guess they pulled the rug out from under him.
00:05:57.000What is the company that's doing this?
00:05:58.000So you had all these royalties coming in, and then all of a sudden, there was a bunch of estates, like the Robin Williams estate, I think maybe George Carlin.
00:06:08.000They were like, hey, we should be getting more money for this, because it's 50-50 split.
00:06:13.000But songwriters are getting a writer credit and a performance credit.
00:06:45.000Okay, so instead of like an artist that didn't write their song, the comics are like, no, we deserve to get paid twice because we created the entire content.
00:08:13.000The problem is when you're starting out, you say things in a very specific way, and that might not be the best way to say that bit, but that's the way you're kind of stuck saying it.
00:08:25.000Even today, I'm working on a new one, and I'm like, I don't know about this.
00:08:30.000I feel like there's another way to say this, and I'm just banking on the way that I've been saying it over and over and over again, and maybe I should just abandon it and let it sit there for a bit and come back to it.
00:08:40.000So I didn't work summers for a long time.
00:08:57.000And then your brain is like, I have to get to this point, but I can't remember how I got there.
00:09:01.000And so then you start to put it together a little differently.
00:09:03.000They're probably working in the back of your head subconsciously, too, because even though you're not doing comedy for three months, you're still probably thinking, in three months I'm going to do comedy.
00:09:17.000That's what they say sleeping on it is all about.
00:09:20.000Yeah, like if you're the piano piece, if you can't figure it out, you play it before you go to bed a bunch of times, and then all of a sudden the next morning you wake up and you're like, fiddle-a-doo.
00:09:27.000There's been a few times where I woke up in the middle of the night to pee, and I realized how to fix a joke.
00:09:33.000Yeah, it's just like all of a sudden you're like, oh, that's it.
00:09:50.000I think there's a part back there that's just constantly going and we don't hear about it.
00:09:54.000And then when it's done, they're like, get it to the fucking front.
00:09:57.000Yeah, but even the creation of an idea is so mysterious.
00:10:02.000I mean, that's why people invoke the concept of the muse.
00:10:05.000You know, that's the Steven Pressfield, he like swears by it.
00:10:08.000The War of Art book is all about the muse, about summoning the muse when you write.
00:10:13.000There's something weird going on, I'll tell you that, because it seems like they just like enter into your head like a photon, like some shit from space, just doot, all of a sudden it's in there, and like, oh, that was an idea.
00:10:24.000And even though it's your idea, like I take credit for writing, like I'll take credit for fixing jokes, I'll take credit for like going up, but I always feel like I can't really take credit for the original idea.
00:10:35.000The original idea is almost like this little gift.
00:10:39.000Like, you see something, or somebody's doing something, and you go, oh shit, and that sparks something, and you just go, alright, I gotta write this down.
00:10:46.000Sometimes you just say it out of nowhere.
00:11:21.000It's one of the only art forms where almost everybody writes their own stuff.
00:11:25.000Like, if you think about musicians, there's a lot of musicians who write their own music, and they're kind of revered, right?
00:11:32.000Musicians, when you go to see a musician, like a singer-songwriter, and they write their own stuff, and you sit there, and you're like, wow, this person crafted this in their mind, and practiced it alone, and You know, there's something, like, magical about that.
00:11:44.000But you can go see, like, a really talented singer that has writers that write for them.
00:11:49.000And they're great, too, but you don't feel the same, you know?
00:11:52.000No, because you feel like you're good at playing the guitar, you have a great voice, you're good at making someone else's work.
00:16:04.000I was reading that some people have a thing in their head where when they're talking to someone with an accent, to make that person feel more comfortable, they start to speak in the accent without even knowing.
00:16:20.000Yeah, I mean when I was a kid, I would switch accents like when I moved to new places.
00:16:25.000I realized I only lived in Boston for like six years and I was 19 and I was on television for this thing that I did and I heard myself on TV and I was like, ew!
00:16:56.000Yeah, the best place to do stand-up because to develop there like you're you are that treadmill is going you gotta hop on you gotta move get moving Everybody's moving nobody in the audience has any attention span.
00:17:08.000They don't want to hear you dilly-dally and Pontificate up there.
00:17:41.000You've got to start the car up, let it run, heat the inside to defrost the windshield, get the fucking scraper.
00:17:48.000And then you're out there on a fucking skating rink.
00:17:51.000Your street's a skating rink, so you have to drive five miles an hour, and you have to make sure that you hit the brakes way before the car in front of you, or you're going to cause a pileup.
00:19:56.000In Tibet, I don't know which religion, I don't know what they're practicing, but they have this ritual called the Tibetan Sky Funeral.
00:20:04.000And instead of burying people, what they do is they chop them up and they feed them to vultures.
00:20:10.000Yeah, and this graphic video of this online because it's like this big ritual.
00:20:16.000So this graphic video of these dudes with these like giant cutting boards and fucking cleavers hacking up people and there's a swarm of vultures all around them.
00:20:27.000So they're hacking up body parts and then these vultures are just devouring these human beings.
00:21:33.000Though, I mean, look, nobody wants their loved one to be reduced to meat, you know, but is it better that you're taking your loved one and you're pumping them filled with some toxic chemical that makes it so that they'll never, never rot?
00:21:46.000You can exhume them years later and find fentanyl traces and shit.
00:21:51.000If you believe in something else, like something's going on afterlife-wise, I mean, the soul's gone anyways.
00:21:57.000It's the vessel that you're putting in the ground or letting vultures eat.
00:22:00.000And if you believe that this person was murdered, do a better job now.
00:22:16.000There's a great show by this guy dr. Michael badden and dr. Michael bad would always catch like Husbands that poison their wives secretly or wives that have poisoned all their husbands and people that kill people like in secret sneaky ways and gotten away with it And then he gets on the case and he finds it's like really crazy crazy examples one of them was this one guy and After his wife had died,
00:22:40.000I don't even know if it was his wife, it was maybe his girlfriend, but he kept buying cases of perfume and no one could figure out why this guy was doing this, but he left his wife in the bed and never reported that she was dead and kept fucking her and put like a mask on her and then eventually put like some artificial vagina down there and the perfume,
00:23:04.000he was pouring perfume on her to mask the decay And so eventually, finally, they caught him, but they got these images of what used to be his wife with, like, a mask on the face, and there was clothes on what's left of this body,
00:23:20.000and then there's this, like, tube where the vagina is, and this fucking psycho was banging her corpse and, like, passing out from the smell and just...
00:25:41.000My daughter has a friend who her boyfriend's sister died and she's getting into makeup and hair for a living and they asked her to do the makeup and hair of the dead sister.
00:27:18.000Because nitrogen is what, you know, we take nitrogen and a bunch of other bullshit chemicals and we pour it on this dead topsoil so that these poor corn can survive.
00:27:28.000And then we eat the corn and there's like no nourishment.
00:31:48.000Yeah, because I think once you're over that line, I don't think there's a lot of pulling it back.
00:31:54.000Perhaps, but I think every circumstance is different.
00:31:57.000Yeah, I guess there's that one dude that used to live by a bridge, and he would go out and talk guys off the ledge, and so, I mean, I guess maybe that is.
00:32:06.000There was one guy that jumped, and he lived.
00:32:09.000He's one of the rare guys that lived, and he said as he jumped, he'd realize what a horrible mistake he made, and he wanted to take it back, but he couldn't.
00:32:15.000And he lived, but he was all fucked up, but lived a happier life.
00:32:19.000Like, was thankful that he was alive, which is kind of crazy.
00:32:22.000Yeah, I used to bartend and this dude would come in and he was missing his jaw.
00:32:26.000He's talking to 200 people off the ledge.
00:35:20.000You know, what I would have loved to have seen, actually, is if they could have combined and dropped off funeral and the Olympics and had him in the bobsled run.
00:37:32.000But, it's like, you have to also put it in context.
00:37:37.000There wasn't anybody like him back then.
00:37:39.000There was Jonathan Winters who he took inspiration from who a lot of people forgot about.
00:37:44.000Jonathan Winters was like really weird like that.
00:37:46.000He would do really weird crazy stuff and act like just like different characters and just wouldn't be there and just would hold on to it and people would like panic and they wouldn't know what to do.
00:37:57.000So I think he took a lot of inspiration from Jonathan Winters who's an amazing talent too.
00:38:33.000Then you start to wonder, like, ah, was the comedian part of him the show and the 24-hour photo was the real deal?
00:38:40.000I doubt the 24-hour photo was the real deal.
00:38:43.000I think the real deal was like a deeply depressed person that the reason why they were so good at getting people entertained is because they needed so much more than the average person just to hit like a baseline.
00:38:54.000You know, I think when people are super depressed and then they use comedy as like a way to just like a drug to just get them like Richard Jenny apparently was only happy when he's killing and And then when he got off stage, he was depressed.
00:39:29.000He wanted to be a movie star, apparently.
00:39:31.000So back then in the 1980s and 90s, like what the thing was, was you would graduate into movies, like a Jim Carrey, or into TV like a Seinfeld and you have your own show.
00:43:31.000He always ate, like, clean, organic food, drank water, no booze, fuck you, you know, up in the morning, always running, always calisthenics, always was shredded, never gained weight in between fights, even today.
00:43:42.000I had him on the podcast today, like, a couple months ago.
00:45:16.000So you have that sometimes, you know, you have kids that just have extraordinary genes and then you have this perfect storm of a very intelligent person who is deeply neglected as a child and then adopted by a genius.
00:45:31.000Not just a boxing genius, but a genius in terms of psychology and life and philosophy, and he understood war, and he was a war historian, and he was a boxing historian, and he was also managed by this guy Jim Jeffries, or Jim Jacobs rather, excuse me.
00:45:45.000Jim Jacobs had Jim Jeffries tapes, or James Jeffries.
00:46:44.000So he's 58, he's a year older than me, and so how old was he when he was 13?
00:46:50.000What year was it when he was 13, rather?
00:46:54.000So he was born in 66. I've been 79. 79. Okay.
00:46:59.000No VHS. So the only way you can see these things is if they put them on television, which they might, but then you have to watch it while it's on TV. You can't rewatch it again.
00:47:30.000And they had this incredible convergence of all these things that created Mike Tyson in, like, 1986, where people were like, holy shit!
00:47:40.000When he would walk out there with no bathrobe and just fucking...
00:47:43.000He was a perfect creation of the universe.
00:47:47.000Like, the universe, all the factors that would come into play that make something super special.
00:47:52.000All came in in his, I mean, to be a boxing champion, it could not have had a better convergence of mind, talent, background, and then the people that were influencing him.
00:48:38.000Yeah, it might be good to hypnotize that kid.
00:48:40.000But yeah, I would think hypnotizing anybody before they were aware of what the fuck that means But I don't think hypnotizing is what people think it is either.
00:48:53.000I've only been hypnotized once, so I can't speak to what the total potential of what someone can do with hypnosis is.
00:49:08.000You're just in a different state of consciousness.
00:49:11.000And it's almost like you're allowed to look at things for what they really are versus all this noise that's around most of the ideas in your head.
00:49:19.000Where you're blaming other people when you should probably blame yourself when, you know, you were lazy and that's why it went bad and it wasn't like someone else's fault and all that stuff that keeps people on the wrong track, that keeps people drinking too much and gambling too much,
00:49:35.000all those weird things that are going on in your head, like, you'll get past that and you'll see you.
00:49:41.000And you see you for a brief amount of time, and you kind of analyze what it is that's fucking with you.
00:49:47.000And then someone who's like a good performance psychologist can implant ideas, like help you implant ideas in your mind of how you're going to approach things from now on.
00:49:58.000How are you going to look at things from now on?
00:50:18.000I mean, some fighters, there's a thing that happens with some fighters in the midst of a chaotic fight.
00:50:25.000They will forget about the game plan and they will just go on instinct and start throwing down and they wind up getting knocked out or something goes bad.
00:50:42.000But you're letting that lizard brain take over.
00:50:44.000And you're not sticking to the game plan.
00:50:46.000The really good fighters know how, even in these chaotic scrambles, to keep things technical.
00:50:53.000Don't do anything that's going to get you caught.
00:50:56.000It looks nutty when you're watching it on television.
00:50:59.000But if you're watching a tactician like a Max Holloway or a San Hagen or Sean O'Malley, these fighters are very tactical.
00:51:09.000Everything they're doing is to elicit a reaction from you and then they have counters based on how you do things and then they start downloading how you're moving and reacting to things and then they'll start plotting and moving.
00:51:21.000Anderson Silva was the very best at that.
00:51:23.000He would take the first round and he would just be kind of like moving with you and moving with you and then towards the end of the round he started fucking you up.
00:51:30.000He was just downloading Anderson in his prime.
00:51:34.000You know, I had never seen anything like him.
00:54:32.000Well, he was just so smart that he didn't care if people were booing.
00:54:35.000And then the UFC would get mad at him.
00:54:37.000They'd get mad at him because those performances, even though he's the greatest of all time, at the time he was for sure, in my eyes, he's still in the conversation.
00:54:44.000During his time period when he was running shit, still in my book, if not the greatest, one of the greatest of all time, for sure.
00:54:52.000He's in the conversation, whatever that, the conversation's so subjective, and I change my opinion on it all the time.
00:54:57.000But during that time period, he didn't give a fuck if people were booing.
00:56:13.000There's guys that for a while, whatever those years are, you can't beat them.
00:56:19.000No one's gonna beat them for these years.
00:56:21.000And that's just because of his strategy watching you move He was also so good at being the champion, right?
00:56:29.000There's a thing about performing in front of so many people with such high stakes, and if you've never experienced that before, the first time you ever fight for a championship fight, it's so crazy.
00:59:02.000But also, there's a thing about a guy like a Charles Barkley, or a guy like you, it's like you don't really have the time to dedicate to a thing like golf to really get great at it.
01:01:36.000His understanding of where he should be versus where he is, he wants to know exactly how much pressure to apply on that cue to make that ball dance exactly the way.
01:02:11.000You're like, why can't I do this all the time?
01:02:13.000Why can't I just have so much fun with the jokes all the time?
01:02:17.000Sometimes you're having so much fun saying the material, it makes everything so much better.
01:02:21.000And you're like, why don't I do this all the time?
01:02:24.000And it just feels like every single thing you say is gonna be awesome.
01:02:28.000And the more you do it, the more you're there.
01:02:30.000So if you have a Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, like if you're doing a real week in a place, by the time Saturday rolls around, you're a wizard.
01:05:49.000Because they're used to those little holes, and also these big ass holes.
01:05:52.000It's just getting used to the ball moving different.
01:05:56.000Because their balls are so small, they don't put a lot of side English on them, and they don't do weird stuff with them.
01:06:01.000American cue balls are larger, and the billiard balls are larger, so they do a lot of shit with them.
01:06:06.000They throw balls into the side pocket with English and do weird things.
01:06:10.000So they have to learn all that stuff, and then they learn how to break hard.
01:06:13.000Once they do that, their technique is so flawless.
01:06:16.000Yeah, spot on, because they're going just straight shots.
01:06:18.000And they have academies that teach people how to play.
01:06:21.000There's a few really good teachers in this country, but there's no national system where you have a university that you go to to learn how to play snooker.
01:06:58.000I remember going over there for a gig a long time ago and turning on the TV. I'm like, whoa, they got Snooker on like regular TV. This is nuts.
01:08:43.000So he's got to hit a ball, and then it's got to go three cushions and hit another ball.
01:08:46.000But what it really does is if you learn this game, it teaches you how billiard balls move around a table, so it really helps you play better position for pocket billiards, and it helps you learn how to play safe better and how to kick at balls better.
01:09:02.000That's pretty wild that he's hitting that ball, though.
01:11:04.000And you appreciate the athleticism that you have to have, the cardio that you have to have to be running back and forth and back and forth and sprinting and sideways and, you know, ducking and dodging and...
01:11:17.000Fucking kicking balls at crazy angles.
01:11:44.000My kids both played soccer, junior and senior year, and it was great because I don't know anything about it, and it's the only sport I wouldn't yell at.
01:11:51.000Because I didn't want people to go, that's fucking wrong, dude.
01:11:54.000So I just sit there and keep my mouth shut.
01:15:50.000I got a rental car once because my car was in the shop.
01:15:53.000He took the keys, made a copy of the keys, and then when I brought that rental car back, had me drive him there, and I didn't know it, he stole the car and then drove to Las Vegas because the cops were looking for him for writing bad checks.
01:17:49.000Yeah, I remember my first exposure to comedy was probably, the actual stand-up comedy was probably Bill Cosby, or Bill Cosby record.
01:17:58.000Because my parents had a Bill Cosby record, and they had Cheech and Chong, and I think they might have had a George Carlin one too, because everyone had records back then, because there was nothing on TV, and so you'd sit around and you'd listen to records.
01:18:11.000You know, so we listened to Cheech and Chong when I was a little kid.
01:18:15.000I was probably like eight or nine or something like that.
01:18:53.000And we were in the movie theater, and I'll never forget this, because this is the first time I'd ever experienced anything like this.
01:18:58.000I'd never seen someone do stand-up comedy for a long time.
01:19:02.000I had only seen, like, a guy do some jokes on The Tonight Show.
01:19:06.000You know, like a real, like, cut-and-dry, set-up punchline, five-minute, all right, that was terrific, come sit on the couch.
01:19:13.000And the comic would sit there, and I would tell you about the zoo.
01:19:16.000You know, and so that was my exposure to comedy.
01:19:18.000But in the theater, I remember, I'll never forget this, sitting in the theater, watching Live on the Sunset Trip, and looking at the audience, and people were moving around.
01:19:28.000I remember this guy was holding his stomach, and he was slapping the chair, and his wife was slapping him.
01:21:33.000Pizza on Earth, goodwill towards manicotti, rebel without a waistline, strawberry fields for breakfast, Lord of the Ringdings, the Earl of Sandwich, the Prince of Wales,
01:21:49.000and the Little House on the Prairie all rolled into one.
01:30:03.000But it's like that thing of like you try to set up society where you prevent people from being mean.
01:30:12.000But the problem is people are going to be mean.
01:30:14.000And the only way to prevent people from being mean is to really ostracize people who are mean and then have everybody else learn from that and like learn from the way you talk about these people that are mean.
01:30:25.000And then we all kind of grow together.
01:30:27.000You can't have laws that enforce your opinion of what someone can or cannot be allowed to say, because then you never get that guy's joke.
01:30:36.000Your friend, sick, because I'm fucking my sister.
01:31:38.000It's like these kids now can take a chair from the back of the room, throw it at the teacher when he's not looking, and that teacher just has to sit there and take it.
01:31:46.000Well, yeah, especially when you get into high school things get very very dangerous very very very dangerous because people are starting to get strong and They're aggressive and these men these young men have testosterone for the first time in their life So all of a sudden you're 13 and then boom the factory opens Yahoo and you start growing you got a mustache now now you're 14 and 15 and then you get this fucking loser teacher and This teacher's talking shit,
01:33:44.000Like, you know, we have the good fortune of understanding the mistakes of those who came before us.
01:33:52.000And even, like, I mean, even thinking about, we can't even put our mind in what it must be like to be a kid that grows up in the south side of Chicago in 2024 where you're seeing people shot every weekend.
01:35:40.000But they're in a war in an American city, which is crazy.
01:35:45.000But if you look at the death toll of people killed...
01:35:50.000In Afghanistan during the height of the war, it's comparable to the people killed in South Side of Chicago.
01:35:56.000I would imagine the people in the South Side of Chicago, more people get killed.
01:36:00.000I think what happens in war, of course, is, depending upon the war, of course, but sometimes there's large amounts of debt, like in Gaza, if you can call it a war.
01:36:09.000Like, there's large amounts of deaths, and large amounts in one day, right?
01:36:13.000Which, in gang violence, you get it over the weekend.
01:36:16.000You know, this guy got shot, that guy got shot, it's cumulative.
01:41:51.000I have people that will go through one of my albums, and then they'll actually make it into a sketch where they play all of the parts, me, my children, whatever it is that I'm talking about.
01:42:01.000And then they put that out and tag me in it, and it's like, I don't know, they make money off of it.
01:42:53.000Well, there's so many blog posts that are clearly either made by AI or by foreign people that don't totally understand English because the way they phrase things is goofy and they do like celebrity news.
01:43:03.000Like sometimes you get suckered into clicking on a link, like you read like a legitimate story and then underneath it is a sponsored link.
01:43:42.000And then they're getting the ad revenue off of that.
01:43:44.000We had a guy back in the day that went to jail because he rigged something so that every time you went to his website, if you afterwards bought something from Amazon, it would credit his account.
01:43:58.000Like you went through his website, his website link to get Amazon.
01:44:09.000But this guy went to jail because he was making money that really wasn't his money.
01:44:14.000So instead of someone saying, hey, I don't know if they still do this, but the way it used to do it, they would say, hey, if you want to support this podcast, use our Amazon link.
01:44:24.000On our website, and we get a cutback from Amazon every time you use it.
01:44:28.000And so they would do it as a way to support, and then it would also, it would probably facilitate some impulse purchases that maybe you would never make before.
01:44:37.000Like you go, oh, this guy's got a great podcast.
01:44:39.000I'm going to help him out by going to Amazon.
01:45:01.000If they go to my website or they go to your videos, stuff like that, and then they can send ads out to people that have similar click patterns.
01:47:52.000Yeah, so if, like, you won't do something, they can get someone who looks super similar to you to do it, and then they'll go, fuck you, I'm suing you.
01:47:59.000People were sending me a car commercial for a while that I had to listen to it twice because I thought it was me.
01:48:19.000Yeah, the Scarlett Johansson thing, we played it.
01:48:22.000Now that I'm thinking about it, when we played it here, it was different because she was the voice of her, right?
01:48:29.000So she was the voice that Joaquin Phoenix falls in love with.
01:48:32.000But the clip that we played, it was her like bedtime talking, you know, like he was laying in bed and I think she had like more of a raspy time to go to sleep voice.
01:48:42.000Whereas in, you know, the regular ChatGPT implementation is like Scarlett at the office.
01:51:50.000There's that thought because there's so many instances of things like what we think of that are in like the Bhagavad Gita and these ancient texts that are thousands and thousands of years old and they're talking about things that fly in the sky, flying chariots, flying things that have gods in them.
01:52:13.000For sure some of them probably, right?
01:52:15.000Some of these things that people see streaking across the sky, they see something extraordinary, it lights up the sky, and then mythology gets attached to that, right?
01:52:23.000And then people, you know, ten years from now tell that story.
01:52:27.000And then other people tell the story that's told to them by the people that were there, and then that gets a little twisted up like a game of telephone.
01:52:36.000There's uniformity to the descriptions of the movements of the ships and what these things do and why they're interested in us and what they say.
01:52:47.000It gets very weird to the point it's like, okay, if this is a mass illusion, if this is a creation of the mind, like Carl Jung thought it was a creation of the mind, thought it was some sort of an illusion that people conjure up in their mind, but it's just like a common illusion.
01:53:03.000It's just like it's there in the human psyche.
01:53:18.000Maybe it's total bullshit, lies, people with myths that make up myths about comets and natural disasters and all kinds of other stuff, and also interdimensional beings.
01:53:56.000Yeah, there could be a lot of things going on simultaneously, and we're concentrating on one.
01:54:01.000Some of them I 100% am convinced are government drones that work on some incredibly sophisticated propulsion system that probably doesn't have a person in it, but they probably can move at fantastic speeds using some new novel propulsion system that they don't want to release to the public.
01:54:40.000I think they try them out on the troops, just like they try out vaccines in the troops, just like they try out burn pits.
01:54:46.000You know, they didn't test burn pits to make sure that people weren't going to get sick if they're just breathing in toxic fumes from all the garbage from thousands of troops.
01:55:35.000The thing about Bigfoot that's really interesting, though, is that Native Americans have a bunch of different names for them.
01:55:41.000There's a lot of names for them, and they don't really have a lot of fake animals.
01:55:46.000It's not a common trait in North American culture, in any Native American culture, rather, to worship a bunch of different things or to talk about a bunch of different things that aren't real.
01:55:57.000Like, mostly they were talking about real things and then spirits, right?
01:56:01.000Like, they would talk about the different spirits of the sky and spirits of the sun and nature.
01:56:06.000They're essentially talking about Mother Earth and God and Gaia and nature.
01:56:09.000But they didn't have, like, fake animals.
01:57:40.000Also, where it existed makes sense because if you think about the sightings, the sightings are all in the Pacific Northwest, right?
01:57:47.000The Pacific Northwest, if you follow that up past Alaska, which also has a lot of sightings, then you go across the Bering Land Bridge, right?
01:57:55.000And Asia was where this thing existed.
01:58:07.000There's so much evidence of people that were here 25,000 years ago.
01:58:12.000There's footprints in the ground, like in mud, that they've now carbon dated to more than 20-plus thousand years old.
01:58:21.000And so that's just what we have, right?
01:58:23.000That's just the footprint that we got lucky and got from 20. Who's to say that there's not people that were here 50,000 years ago, 100,000 years ago?
01:58:40.000If you go back 20,000 years ago, you're dealing with North American lions, which were the biggest lions on Earth, bigger than African lions.
01:59:39.000I would love if the afterlife, you were just there for an hour, hooked you up to a fucking cord, put everything that happened in there so you know, and then that's out.
02:01:48.000If there's ever been a real indication that we're in a simulation, it's like this season of USA is the craziest season that's ever existed.
02:02:02.000There's so many twists and turns, so many plots, so many villains, So many incompetent, bumbling fools that you're like, there's no way that lady's a heartbeat away from the president.
02:04:33.000It looks like if you were gonna have a bumbling person in a movie, like almost like a Comedy of Errors or a Coen Brothers movie about an assassination attempt on a president.
02:04:45.000You have this lady, like here, watch what her gun is.
02:04:48.000Look, look, she gets her gun out, she tried to put it in there, she couldn't do it, and she's thinking about putting it back in there.
02:06:07.000Like, if he turns his head at the last second, and the bullet grazes his ears, if he didn't, it hits the back of his head, and he's dead, and then we fall into chaos, and who knows what the fuck happens?
02:06:58.000To watch this, the most bombastic and manly of presidents, for lack of a better term, to see him with these two female bumbling Secret Service agents, especially the one,
02:07:14.000to see that, to see everything happen the way it is, to see that they knew this guy was on the roof, to hear that that guy had pointed his rifle before that at a cop...
02:07:23.000So the cop engaged him, he pointed the ride bill, and the cop ran away.
02:07:26.000The guy climbed the roof with a ladder.
02:09:55.000Like, you're seeing this 20-year-old kid, his life is over.
02:09:57.000Like, somehow or another, he talked himself into trying to assassinate the president as a lone gunman in Pennsylvania, got on top of a roof, either through sheer incompetence, Or for some other reason, he actually gets a shot off, and the president just moves his head at the right time?
02:10:17.000The whole thing is, if it was in a movie, I'd be like, shut the fuck up!
02:10:30.000Or maybe he wants him here to expose how crazy our political system really is.
02:10:36.000Because the only way we find out how coordinated everything is, whether you're a Trump fan or not, even if you hate Trump, put that aside for a second and just look at how much coordination there is in the media to go after him.
02:10:52.000And it exposes like this thing where you have to step back and go, wait a minute, hold on a second.
02:11:31.000And they went through that for years and years, and then you start going, okay, What else is coordinated where everybody is saying something?
02:12:09.000What is the motivation to getting these stories out?
02:12:13.000Are these narratives created by the real government that runs everything and then tells the news organizations that are in business with them what to say and what to do?
02:12:42.000There's so many stories that I'm sure are bullshit that I've parroted.
02:12:45.000But if Trump wouldn't play the political game, if he wouldn't put the people on the Supreme Court, I know it's his job when he's in there, but if he wouldn't do any of that shit, he's definitely the come out on stage and be like, waving papers, you guys aren't gonna fucking believe this!
02:13:41.000The White House Press Correspondence Dinner was always supposed to be this thing where comedians would do it, and they would, like, Michelle Wolfe did it one year, fucking crushed it.
02:14:26.000You know, he was like saying he knows for sure that Obama came from Kenya, and then there's people that were like examining photoshops of the birth certificate.
02:15:24.000So much of life really feels like a simulation.
02:15:26.000And the thing about this Trump stuff and just all of the stuff that's happening with social media and AI. The guy who's at the helm...
02:15:38.000Of one of the biggest social media networks in the world is Elon Musk Elon Musk said that the odds of us not being in the simulation are in the billions He believes wholeheartedly that we're in a simulation See if you can find him saying that because it's such a nutty quote Because when someone says that you go.
02:16:02.000Oh, yeah, maybe but when Elon Musk says that and he says it Definitively.
02:16:07.000He says it like with pure confidence, and he's no hyperbole.
02:16:12.000He's just stating it like this is something I've analyzed.
02:16:14.000This is something I've thought about for a long time.
02:16:17.000Yeah, but he also made that Cybertruck.
02:16:56.000Well, the argument for the simulation, I think, is quite strong because if you assume any improvement at all over time, any improvement, 1%, 0.1%, just extend the time frame, make it a thousand years,
02:17:12.000a million years, the universe is 13.8 billion years old.
02:17:17.000Civilization, if you count it, if you're very generous, civilization is maybe seven or eight thousand years old, if you count it from the first writing.
02:18:23.000Like, our concept of things being real is, even if you, like, look at quantum physics, right, which I'm definitely gonna butcher, but there's the observer effect.
02:18:32.000There's this thing that they do where they look at things on a quantum level, and when you're looking at them and measuring them, they have a different reaction.
02:18:39.000There's something that's going on where we're interacting with matter.
02:18:47.000If you get down to the lowest levels of understandable reality, you get into subatomic particles, and then you have spooky action at a distance where these things are somehow or another, they're connected in vast spaces,
02:19:05.000but they interact with each other instantaneously.
02:19:09.000And if you take photons, and photons are quantumly entangled, they figured out how to take some sort of a super sophisticated image of photons that are quantum entangled.
02:21:52.000We went over it with Eric Weinstein, didn't we?
02:21:55.000It says so that yin-yang was programmed into it.
02:21:59.000Recovering enough information to recreate a yin-yang symbol programmed into the photon-generating apparatus.
02:22:06.000Applying tricks of holography, the researchers were able to read positional information into interference of two separated light waves, recovering enough information to recreate a yin-yang symbol programmed into the photon-generating apparatus.
02:22:22.000Yeah, but I don't think they're saying they programmed that into it.
02:22:25.000If you see what they're saying, the researchers were able to read positional information in the interference of two separated light waves, recovering enough information to recreate a yin-yang symbol programmed into the photon-generating apparatus.
02:22:41.000I think they're saying that they're recreating this symbol based on what's happening.
02:22:47.000I don't think they're saying they program it to look like that.
02:22:52.000My guess is that they're doing that so they knew what they were looking for.
02:22:56.000It says, as simple as the yin-yang looks, in this single static image represents a significant leap in measuring numerous quantum states in a short time.
02:23:04.000Don't you think that Eric Weinstein would have picked up on that if that's what it was saying?
02:23:10.000Go back to what it just said there, because I wanted to read the next...
02:23:37.000It looks like they were looking at them and then figured out how to map them by what they were looking at and then could program it, right?
02:23:43.000Isn't quantum all sorts of directions, not just XY? It's a flat image, you know, and it's like all the dimensions, so it's in super space and up and down and left and right.
02:23:53.000Well, how much can they see of a photon, right?
02:27:10.000We wanted to be, like, a guy with rules.
02:27:13.000But there are some kind of rules, right?
02:27:16.000As human beings, when we interact with each other incorrectly, we feel bad.
02:27:20.000When we interact with each other correctly, we get things done together, we spread love, we spread joy, we spread happiness, and that's a lot of the tenets of religion are preaching that.
02:27:32.000So it's almost like there's some guidelines that these people who had figured some whisper of what God is out and they wrote it down on these animal skins and they locked them up in a fucking clay pot in Qumran and they found them and deciphered them and that's what it is,
02:27:52.000Whatever that is, is then literally interpreted, and it's interpreted by zealots, and it's interpreted by people that use it to control people's behavior, and it's interpreted in a manner that controls large populations and And forces people to be subjugated.
02:28:14.000Like that is the whole reason why the revolution, when Martin Luther created a phonetic version of the Bible and others were doing it at the same time as well or similar time periods, people were freaking out because now the Bible was available to people that didn't read Latin.
02:28:29.000So now the Bible is available in German.
02:28:31.000And then guys like Martin Luther were saying, interpret the Bible as you will.
02:28:35.000And the priest was like, no, you fucking don't.
02:29:28.000So maybe they kind of understood some things, but they talked about it.
02:29:34.000It was an oral tradition for a thousand years before it was even written down some of these stories.
02:29:40.000And some of these stories have origins where they're super similar in other religions, super similar catastrophe tales, super similar, like there's Noah's Ark, which is real similar to the Epic of Gilgamesh, which is real, like Thor is real similar to Jesus.
02:29:56.000It's like, A lot of, like, real, like, what really happened?
02:30:01.000And if it's the beginning and it's light, maybe it's birth.
02:30:04.000Maybe it's the beginning of somebody's life.
02:32:42.000That happens, though, if you bring somebody on the road, you know, and you're a big act, like a puppet act, like a very specific kind of act.
02:32:48.000Like, they're like, they don't want to hear, like, your observations about your relationship.
02:33:53.000Living in Minnesota, and he goes, I like you, so I'm going to match what the club pays you, and I'm going to pay for part of your plane ticket.
02:34:02.000And I don't think I would have been able to keep doing comedy without him.
02:36:16.000When you see him do stand-up, you get it.
02:36:19.000And then when people become a fan of his, because he's got a huge following now because he killed Tony, and then when you go see him live, like the Black Keys came and they did my podcast and they were going to come to the club afterwards and they said, dude, can William Montgomery come?
02:37:17.000There was a famous story about a club that booked him and the guy before him It was like this really high-energy guy.
02:37:24.000I think the guy actually did like a backflip on stage like something nutty like to close his set out and like super high energy that was the middle act and it was like a lot of hack bullshit and then Hedberg went on after him it was bombing and so he got fucked over like they gave him the middle pay even though he's headlining and they made the other guy headline and He's like,
02:39:09.000It becomes so contagious because he's so good and he's so infectious.
02:39:15.000It's like whatever he's doing is like you're infected with his cadence, his timing, especially when you're young, when you're starting out.
02:39:24.000Hedberg got so famous and I was so young and impressionable that we were out eating one time and he has a joke about, you know what my friend said?