The Joe Rogan Experience - Joe Rogan Experience #2179 - Bridget Phetasy

00:00:01.000 Joe Rogan Podcast, check it out!

00:00:04.000 The Joe Rogan Experience.

00:00:06.000 Train by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night, all day.

00:00:13.000 Do you have a new phone?

00:00:15.000 What year is that one?

00:00:16.000 This one is like one of the rehabbed ones.

00:00:19.000 Those are still good though.

00:00:21.000 Which number is it?

00:00:23.000 13, I think?

00:00:24.000 Oh, those are still good.

00:00:25.000 I have an 11 that's still good.

00:00:27.000 Yeah.

00:00:28.000 I keep an 11 for one of my numbers.

00:00:29.000 Okay. 1.00

00:00:30.000 One of my bullshit numbers. 1.00

00:00:32.000 For what? 0.99

00:00:34.000 There's certain people you can't give the real number to.

00:00:36.000 Oh, yeah.

00:00:37.000 Why would you even give them a number though?

00:00:38.000 You're like a straightforward guy.

00:00:40.000 Because you have to sometimes.

00:00:42.000 Sometimes you have to communicate with people. 1.00

00:00:43.000 But you want a phone that you just stick in a fucking drawer somewhere. 0.99

00:00:46.000 Yeah, and check like once a month. 1.00

00:00:48.000 If that.

00:00:49.000 Yeah.

00:00:52.000 It just gets crazy where so many relationships become like completely transactional.

00:00:57.000 And, you know, like every time someone texts you, they want something.

00:01:01.000 And it's just so frustrating.

00:01:02.000 I can see it even being your friend. 0.99

00:01:05.000 I can see it from a fucking mile away now. 0.99

00:01:08.000 People will be like, hey, Bridge! 0.98

00:01:10.000 I'm like, I'm not introducing you to Joe.

00:01:12.000 Leave me alone.

00:01:15.000 All my friends have a story.

00:01:17.000 Somebody who has a business idea.

00:01:19.000 No, I mean...

00:01:20.000 I think I'm going to help them sell skateboards.

00:01:21.000 If someone's like, hey, let's get coffee.

00:01:23.000 It's been too long.

00:01:24.000 I'm like, nope.

00:01:28.000 Not doing it.

00:01:29.000 That's hilarious.

00:01:30.000 I had a friend from high school reach out randomly.

00:01:32.000 Hey, Bridge! 0.97

00:01:33.000 Nope.

00:01:34.000 I see it.

00:01:35.000 I see it from a mile away now.

00:01:38.000 I'm like, what is it like to be you?

00:01:40.000 It's odd.

00:01:41.000 Because I'm just like, you know, like an outer asteroid in the universe, but imagine being like the planet itself.

00:01:51.000 I've managed to stay myself, which is shocking.

00:01:55.000 Yeah, you have.

00:01:56.000 But I have really good friends.

00:01:57.000 You know, my friends are really good friends. 0.96

00:01:59.000 And I think you have friends who take the piss out of you. 0.98

00:02:03.000 Yes. 0.62

00:02:04.000 And they've been my friends for 20, 30 years.

00:02:06.000 Yeah.

00:02:07.000 Like Joey and I have been friends for almost 30 years.

00:02:10.000 Yeah.

00:02:10.000 27 years or 28 years.

00:02:12.000 It might be 30 now. 1.00

00:02:14.000 Fuck. 1.00

00:02:14.000 I might have met him in 94. Yeah. 1.00

00:02:17.000 It helps to have, like, I was asking my husband right before I left about a tweet I was going to send out, and he's like, meh.

00:02:24.000 And I was like, is this too much?

00:02:27.000 And then I was like, fine!

00:02:28.000 He's like, oh, what, do you just want me to, like, clap for you?

00:02:31.000 I was like, I'm so glad you're my husband.

00:02:33.000 Yeah, you definitely need someone who's not impressed.

00:02:35.000 No, not impressed at all.

00:02:37.000 Or, at the very least, maybe not impressed, but also not bullshitting you.

00:02:40.000 No. 0.99

00:02:41.000 He will not bullshit. 0.86

00:02:42.000 He won't bullshit anyone. 0.98

00:02:43.000 He suffers no fools at all.

00:02:46.000 That's great.

00:02:46.000 That ensures that you won't live in a world of compromise.

00:02:49.000 No.

00:02:50.000 Some people are okay. 0.99

00:02:51.000 They just fuck up every now and then. 0.99

00:02:53.000 You have to tell them, hey man, don't lie to me. 1.00

00:02:55.000 You don't have to lie.

00:02:56.000 Don't do that. 0.84

00:02:57.000 But it's just this weird thing that people fall back on, bullshitting and lying.

00:03:03.000 They just fall back on it. 0.82

00:03:04.000 And they don't even know they're doing it to themselves.

00:03:07.000 You will have less respect for yourself.

00:03:09.000 You'll...

00:03:10.000 Yeah.

00:03:10.000 So it's not worth it.

00:03:11.000 Nah.

00:03:12.000 It's not worth it because you just create these things that aren't real in your life.

00:03:17.000 These relationships, these friendships that aren't based on reality.

00:03:21.000 You know? 0.97

00:03:22.000 And if a person can't handle the truth, you can't tell them, hey, that sucks. 0.98

00:03:26.000 Yeah.

00:03:26.000 Like, you got to work on this.

00:03:27.000 You got to change this.

00:03:28.000 You got to do that.

00:03:29.000 Yeah.

00:03:29.000 If you don't do that, it's not going to get any better.

00:03:31.000 You're like, what?

00:03:31.000 I thought it was the best book ever written.

00:03:33.000 No.

00:03:34.000 No.

00:03:35.000 I mean, all my favorite editors have been so hard on me.

00:03:38.000 I want honest criticism.

00:03:41.000 Yeah.

00:03:42.000 You write jokes for your haters.

00:03:45.000 Write jokes to turn them over.

00:03:47.000 Like, ah, that was a pretty good one. 1.00

00:03:48.000 Fuck her. 1.00

00:03:50.000 You know, Stan Hope told me once that he writes jokes like a defense attorney. 1.00

00:03:55.000 Oh, interesting.

00:03:56.000 Yeah, he examines his jokes as if he was like prosecuting them.

00:04:01.000 It's great!

00:04:02.000 That's really funny.

00:04:03.000 It's very similar to mine.

00:04:04.000 What I said, I write jokes for haters.

00:04:06.000 Yeah.

00:04:07.000 You gotta look at it like a hater sometimes.

00:04:09.000 Yeah.

00:04:09.000 Because you can get too in love with your stuff.

00:04:11.000 Yeah.

00:04:11.000 It's too easy.

00:04:13.000 It's too easy to get in love with your stuff.

00:04:14.000 The audience will tell you too.

00:04:16.000 Well, that's the difference between comedy and other things.

00:04:19.000 It's hard if you're just a journalist.

00:04:23.000 You kind of believe your opinion makes sense.

00:04:27.000 And all of them are doing the same thing.

00:04:30.000 Almost all of them, except for the independent ones.

00:04:33.000 They're almost all doing the same things.

00:04:37.000 They're expressing their thoughts to a very particular group of people.

00:04:41.000 And they're also lying about another group of people almost always.

00:04:47.000 Yeah.

00:04:48.000 Like the right does it and the left does it.

00:04:50.000 Yeah, it's all fan fiction.

00:04:52.000 Yeah, it is fan fiction.

00:04:53.000 Like the right does it with liberals because liberals aren't Antifa.

00:04:59.000 Liberals aren't the people that are lighting Starbucks on fire and shooting cops.

00:05:04.000 That's not liberals.

00:05:06.000 That is just a thing that has existed in a team where you allow anyone to join a team.

00:05:12.000 So if you have something where anybody can join the team, right, which is basically what being a liberal or a conservative is, anyone can join the team.

00:05:20.000 No, they don't like the sludge, Joe. 0.98

00:05:22.000 Everybody loves sluts. 1.00

00:05:23.000 Not the conservatives. 0.99

00:05:24.000 Not publicly.

00:05:25.000 Yeah, exactly. 0.99

00:05:26.000 Listen, I know a lot of those ladies fucking party hard, but they do it for Jesus. 1.00

00:05:31.000 No, no, no. 1.00

00:05:31.000 We'll get to that. 1.00

00:05:31.000 I know. 1.00

00:05:32.000 They do it for Jesus. 1.00

00:05:33.000 I'm just saying, publicly, keep those sluts out of our party. 1.00

00:05:36.000 It's the same thing, though, man. 0.99

00:05:39.000 I'm telling you, it's the same thing. 0.99

00:05:40.000 If you were in Antifa, or if you are Patriot Front, I could have got either one of you fucks. 0.95

00:05:48.000 You just gotta get them early, get them when they're vulnerable, talk them into a very specific ideology. 0.96

00:05:55.000 You know who's your problem?

00:05:57.000 The Jews. 1.00

00:05:58.000 And next thing you know, they think the Jews really are their problems. 0.98

00:06:01.000 And they kind of meet on that. 0.94

00:06:03.000 They're kind of shaking hands.

00:06:03.000 They get together with the Jews with now, which is odd, right?

00:06:06.000 Because of Palestine and Gaza, that's where it's kind of come around. 0.99

00:06:12.000 Like, that moment in time, it's like, everybody's mad at the Jews now. 1.00

00:06:15.000 It's like, fuck. 1.00

00:06:16.000 I mean, that's the ancient conspiracy theory of all conspiracy theories that it's the Jews' fault. 1.00

00:06:22.000 This is like one of the oldest conspiracy theories of mankind. 0.95

00:06:26.000 Well, the Jews make it real tough to join. 1.00

00:06:28.000 They're one of the more interesting religions.

00:06:31.000 Like, if you want to join, my uncle joined.

00:06:34.000 My uncle converted to Judaism.

00:06:36.000 He married a nice Jewish lady.

00:06:37.000 I kind of want to convert.

00:06:38.000 Go for it.

00:06:39.000 I kind of do.

00:06:40.000 It's a lot of work.

00:06:40.000 Let's see what's up.

00:06:43.000 Let's see what new information you get.

00:06:44.000 You'll tell me, right?

00:06:46.000 You'll get the new memos.

00:06:48.000 You'll get a part of that ProtonMail list.

00:06:54.000 But he had to work really hard at it.

00:06:56.000 And I met a lady he was converting, too.

00:06:58.000 I was doing a show once for SyFy where I was trying to get people to...

00:07:03.000 Maybe it was for The Man Show.

00:07:04.000 I don't remember what it was for.

00:07:06.000 Wait, were you on The Man Show?

00:07:07.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:07:07.000 I was an extra on The Man Show.

00:07:09.000 I was in the second generation.

00:07:11.000 I really wasn't very good.

00:07:12.000 Oh, right.

00:07:12.000 Okay.

00:07:12.000 I was an extra in the first.

00:07:15.000 But what we were trying to do is I was trying to get people to convert me.

00:07:18.000 Okay.

00:07:19.000 So I'd go to all these different religious groups and say like...

00:07:23.000 It was pretty easy, wasn't it?

00:07:24.000 Well, it's just like I want to know who's got the best deal.

00:07:27.000 Like, what sounds the best?

00:07:29.000 Everyone got me.

00:07:30.000 It opened my eyes.

00:07:32.000 It did.

00:07:33.000 Because I got to see what I believe are genuinely kind people who want a good result for human beings.

00:07:43.000 They really do.

00:07:44.000 And a lot of them really genuinely believe that their structure, their ideology and way of thinking is really the path to happiness, which is ultimately like the path to God.

00:07:55.000 You know, without, you know, breaking it down to cult-like thinking and how people get absorbed in ideas that are untenable, that just don't make any sense, they're completely ridiculous, but they, like, scientifically-minded people attach themselves to that if it's a part of their religion.

00:08:11.000 Without that, what everybody wants is something good, and they think that the way to have something good for the people that join is to, like, sort of demonize the people that aren't joining, or demonize the other ones.

00:08:24.000 It's a tribal thing.

00:08:26.000 But it's just like all these little patterns of human thinking that we have.

00:08:31.000 People have it with everything.

00:08:33.000 You see with cell phones.

00:08:35.000 You know, you see with Android people versus iPhone people.

00:08:38.000 It's just a normal human...

00:08:42.000 Tribal characteristic that's embedded in our DNA that if we don't address and recognize, we're not going to overcome the hurdle because we're going to be pretending as if it doesn't exist and as if your side is right and the other side is wrong and not just looking at it like, oh, we're stuck in a blue versus red,

00:08:59.000 white versus black, one versus zero. 0.81

00:09:02.000 It's just a tribal thing that exists in the way we operate and we have to be aware of it.

00:09:09.000 And not get mad at people for falling into it because it's normal to fall into it.

00:09:14.000 It's literally a pattern that's embedded in the code that makes you a human being.

00:09:19.000 It's how we created cities.

00:09:21.000 It's why we're here today.

00:09:23.000 It's interesting because I've been reading that, rereading my favorite book, Trickster Makes This World, and how the trickster...

00:09:30.000 Who wrote that?

00:09:31.000 Lewis Hyde.

00:09:32.000 It's all about trickster...

00:09:33.000 What a great title.

00:09:33.000 Oh, it's so good.

00:09:34.000 But it saved me at a point because I didn't really...

00:09:38.000 I had a hard time, and I think this is where Jordan Peterson is so good talking about archetypes, knowing kind of the archetypes, and I didn't really know my role, and I read this book, and I was like, oh...

00:09:50.000 Can you tell me the name of it again?

00:09:51.000 I'm going to get it.

00:09:51.000 Trickster Makes This World.

00:09:53.000 Trickster Makes This World.

00:09:54.000 It's so brilliant.

00:09:55.000 It sounds cool.

00:09:57.000 Actually, one of the quotes that I put in your card is from that book.

00:10:01.000 Really?

00:10:01.000 It's one of my favorite quotes ever.

00:10:03.000 It's all about, he who dupes others and who has also duped himself.

00:10:07.000 He's creator nor destroyer.

00:10:11.000 The people I've noticed who have stayed the most sane is a term I'm using loosely.

00:10:18.000 The people I've noticed, it's like comedians, people who are kind of like tricksters.

00:10:24.000 They've managed to kind of ride the waves of the past eight years because I think they're not too attached.

00:10:32.000 And in this book he talks about how there was all this trickster mythology like Coyote and Hermes and then it got kind of turned into the devil.

00:10:42.000 And it became evil versus good.

00:10:45.000 And when that happened, when the loss of that mythology in the culture happened, it became much more black and white and this kind of dualistic, like you said, tribal thinking without all of...

00:10:58.000 This gray area that I do feel like I look around like malice and all the people.

00:11:04.000 Most of the people who I've been hanging out with and know have been kind of having a blast for like eight years, you know?

00:11:15.000 First I watched everyone on the left lose their mind.

00:11:18.000 Then people on the right lost.

00:11:19.000 It was like I was having the same conversations for four years with the left.

00:11:23.000 Then I was like, all the people on the right, it's going to be fine.

00:11:26.000 It's not the end of the world.

00:11:27.000 And then here we are again.

00:11:29.000 Here we are again.

00:11:30.000 Here we are again.

00:11:31.000 And the only people that make any sense are the ones who aren't on either team. 1.00

00:11:35.000 The people that say things like, you know, as a conservative, I... You're a fucking human being. 1.00

00:11:46.000 Don't say it that way. 1.00

00:11:48.000 Don't think it that way. 0.99

00:11:50.000 There's a bunch of things that you believe, but don't put yourself in a fucking group. 0.94

00:11:54.000 Because there's probably a bunch of stuff that the left agrees with, that you would probably agree with too. 0.98

00:11:59.000 Yeah.

00:12:01.000 You can't be resistant to those ideas simply because they're attached to people you've decided are the enemy, because they might be right.

00:12:09.000 They might be right about welfare, right? 0.95

00:12:11.000 They might be right about, hey, maybe kids shouldn't ever be fucking starving. 0.90

00:12:16.000 As a group of humans that live together on this one little patch of dirt called North America, maybe we should agree that since we have this gigantic amount of money, that no kids should be hungry. 0.95

00:12:27.000 Yeah.

00:12:27.000 How about that?

00:12:28.000 And then, since we got that done, hey, how about regular people? 0.98

00:12:32.000 How about no people should fucking starve? 0.98

00:12:35.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:12:35.000 Regardless of whether or not you think people are lazy or this and that, how much would we solve if no one could possibly starve? 0.99

00:12:42.000 Yeah.

00:12:43.000 We set up free restaurants or free kitchens in every city.

00:12:47.000 We have them.

00:12:47.000 We should have really good ones and massive ones.

00:12:50.000 Yeah.

00:12:51.000 Like, for real.

00:12:51.000 Like, food should be free.

00:12:54.000 For a lot of people.

00:12:55.000 If we're this rich as a country?

00:12:57.000 We're pretty rich.

00:12:59.000 So let's have no babies starve, no babies be malnourished, nobody starves to death.

00:13:03.000 I mean, health, too.

00:13:05.000 Health care would be...

00:13:06.000 100%.

00:13:07.000 You shouldn't be going bankrupt.

00:13:09.000 But you'd have to revamp the whole thing.

00:13:10.000 You'd have to get to the real nitty-gritty, like, why are you prescribing this?

00:13:15.000 Like, who's making money off of this?

00:13:16.000 How did this happen?

00:13:17.000 How many ads did you guys run?

00:13:18.000 What did the ads say?

00:13:21.000 What are the studies?

00:13:22.000 What are all the studies?

00:13:23.000 Not just the ones you submitted.

00:13:25.000 What's the actual data instead of the data that's reviewed by the pharmaceutical company and then given to the scientists in the report when they do their peer review?

00:13:35.000 When that was explained to me, I was like...

00:13:39.000 You guys are making too much money. 0.77

00:13:40.000 You're getting crazy.

00:13:41.000 This is what it is.

00:13:42.000 You went above and beyond the rules because you have too much power and influence.

00:13:46.000 But also, you do great stuff.

00:13:48.000 Yeah, they do.

00:13:49.000 Also, they make life-saving drugs.

00:13:52.000 Also, they stop a lot of diseases.

00:13:55.000 Also, see, there's a lot of good there.

00:13:57.000 You can't say the pharmaceutical drug companies are all evil. 0.99

00:13:59.000 Bitch, they keep us alive in a lot of respects. 1.00

00:14:03.000 Yeah, they do. 1.00

00:14:03.000 They keep people healthy. 1.00

00:14:05.000 They've saved people from depression.

00:14:06.000 There's like a lot of good that pharmaceutical drugs and the drug companies have done.

00:14:11.000 They've saved people who have diabetes.

00:14:12.000 There's a lot of good.

00:14:14.000 A lot of good.

00:14:15.000 So let's say that they're all evil. 1.00

00:14:17.000 No, it's fucking money people. 0.99

00:14:19.000 It's easier to do that, though, too, because you don't have to really come up with a solution if everyone's just at each other's throats. 0.98

00:14:26.000 Well, there's not enough oversight.

00:14:27.000 If there was real oversight, objective oversight by people who actually knew what they were doing, they would never let them get away with prescribing a bunch of stuff that they knew was going to have a negative effect, like the Vioxx scandal.

00:14:40.000 That's part of the whole scandal, was that they knew that people were going to have these effects, these side effects, that were very bad.

00:14:47.000 They knew it.

00:14:48.000 They talked about it in emails, these knuckleheads. 1.00

00:14:51.000 They're fucking so stupid. 1.00

00:14:52.000 They said, we're going to have some problems, but we also think we're going to do well. 1.00

00:14:57.000 They're explaining all the, like, you know, cardiopulmonary, cardiovascular, all these different blood clotting problems. 0.98

00:15:03.000 I have a friend who had a fucking stroke when he took that stuff. 0.99

00:15:06.000 No! 1.00

00:15:07.000 He was in his 30s.

00:15:08.000 Oh, wow.

00:15:08.000 Yeah, he was in his 30s, a martial arts champion.

00:15:11.000 Yeah, I'm glad I'm kind of stupid and I just am like a clown. 0.99

00:15:16.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:15:17.000 I'm not smart enough to fix these problems.

00:15:20.000 I can observe them and experience them on my own and see that it does behoove these people to just have everybody fighting so that they don't actually have to come up with, like politicians in particular, they don't have to come up with real solutions.

00:15:35.000 They can just be like, it's the other guy forever.

00:15:38.000 Have you ever lived in a house that has black mold? 1.00

00:15:41.000 No, thank God, because that shit will destroy you. 1.00

00:15:45.000 It'll destroy you. 1.00

00:15:46.000 Yeah.

00:15:47.000 I've had a couple friends who have had problems with black mold, and it's really interesting.

00:15:52.000 And usually what happens is they get sick, and they're sick all the time, and they can't figure out why they're sick.

00:15:58.000 And they're tired.

00:15:58.000 They're really tired.

00:15:59.000 They're just worn out all the time.

00:16:01.000 And then finally they get their house examined and somebody probably suggested to them and then, oh Jesus Christ, your walls are filled with black mold.

00:16:09.000 And a lot of times it's like a leaky pipe or something, a leaky pipe and there's water in the walls and all the moisture.

00:16:15.000 And in Texas it gets crazy.

00:16:17.000 They get it bad out here. 1.00

00:16:19.000 But when you have that, you have to burn the fucking house down, essentially. 0.99

00:16:25.000 You have to cut out all the walls. 0.99

00:16:27.000 It's a very invasive process.

00:16:29.000 Remember that guy, Tom Likas?

00:16:31.000 Do you remember Tom Likas?

00:16:32.000 He was a radio DJ in LA. It sounds familiar.

00:16:35.000 Yeah.

00:16:36.000 Oh, yeah.

00:16:37.000 Yep, yep, yep. 1.00

00:16:38.000 Yeah, he had Flash Fridays where girls would pull their tits out. 1.00

00:16:41.000 He would tell people they're useless on the phone. 1.00

00:16:44.000 Remember that guy? 0.92

00:16:45.000 He had that.

00:16:46.000 That happened to him.

00:16:47.000 And he was explaining it to me.

00:16:48.000 He said it was horrific.

00:16:50.000 He's just sick all the time.

00:16:51.000 Couldn't figure out what was up.

00:16:52.000 And it's hard to get out of your system.

00:16:54.000 Yep.

00:16:54.000 Hard to get out of your system.

00:16:55.000 It wrecks your health.

00:16:56.000 And it takes a long time to recover just from the effects of it.

00:16:59.000 It's essentially a breathing poison every day.

00:17:01.000 And who knows what it actually does overall that you're not going to recover from.

00:17:05.000 It might actually take years off your life.

00:17:08.000 Who knows?

00:17:08.000 But the point was it's really hard to get rid of it.

00:17:11.000 It's so invasive.

00:17:13.000 And I think that's where money is today.

00:17:16.000 Money is with pharmaceutical drugs.

00:17:18.000 Money is with politics.

00:17:20.000 It's like we could all agree.

00:17:22.000 I think we could all agree that The way the pharmaceutical drug companies should work is they should be very careful about what they prescribe and they should be very careful about side effects and they should be very careful about what is addictive and not addictive and what should be prescribed openly and regularly and what should not be for the greater good of humanity.

00:17:42.000 And even if they did that, they would still make ungodly amounts of money.

00:17:48.000 That's what's so crazy about all this.

00:17:50.000 But it wouldn't be the maximum amount of money.

00:17:52.000 And when you have a publicly shared company, it's your responsibility to the shareholders to make the most money, and you make more money every quarter.

00:17:59.000 You want to keep going.

00:18:00.000 Let's go!

00:18:01.000 Let's go! 1.00

00:18:01.000 Let's fucking go! 1.00

00:18:03.000 Let's go! 0.99

00:18:03.000 That's why planes are falling out of the sky. 0.99

00:18:05.000 That's also why you get a private jet, because you gotta let's fucking go. 0.96

00:18:10.000 I need a private jet. 0.95

00:18:12.000 That's been attached, unfortunately, to our health. 0.99

00:18:15.000 And then you get people that, you know, they fucking advocate for public health, and they look super unhealthy. 0.93

00:18:21.000 And they're telling you that the only solution is bang, bang, bang. 0.97

00:18:24.000 And the only solution is generally tied to something they have invested in. 0.99

00:18:28.000 It's fucking crazy, but it's black mold. 0.99

00:18:31.000 It's black mold. 1.00

00:18:31.000 It is. 1.00

00:18:32.000 That's what it is.

00:18:32.000 And it shouldn't exist.

00:18:34.000 And the resistance to getting stock trading out of politics.

00:18:39.000 Like, you shouldn't be able to affect the stock and trade on it, the policy about a company, and then be able to make...

00:18:48.000 It's like crazy to me!

00:18:49.000 Millions and millions of money.

00:18:51.000 Have you seen the Nancy Pelosi one where they question her?

00:18:53.000 No.

00:18:54.000 You never saw it?

00:18:55.000 I feel like maybe.

00:18:56.000 I have seen it.

00:18:57.000 Finds it. 0.99

00:18:57.000 It's fucking amazing. 0.99

00:18:59.000 Because she's all stammering. 1.00

00:19:00.000 She looks like she's a little drunk already.

00:19:02.000 And then they hit her with it.

00:19:04.000 She's like, what?

00:19:06.000 I think we should be able to participate.

00:19:07.000 But it's just...

00:19:08.000 Oh, I think she, I have seen this.

00:19:10.000 It's amazing how badly she handles it.

00:19:13.000 They're so rich.

00:19:16.000 It's crazy. 0.97

00:19:16.000 Crazy rich! 0.97

00:19:17.000 How are you hundred millionaires? 0.99

00:19:20.000 You get paid like...

00:19:20.000 $170,000 a year.

00:19:22.000 And you're worth hundreds of billions of dollars.

00:19:24.000 That is so wild.

00:19:26.000 It is very Rome-esque, you know?

00:19:28.000 It's amazing.

00:19:29.000 It's amazing they do it right in front of you. 0.98

00:19:31.000 Like, I'm not jerking off. 0.99

00:19:32.000 I'm not jerking off. 0.99

00:19:33.000 It's raining now. 1.00

00:19:34.000 They come right in your face and they're like, suck it. 0.99

00:19:36.000 The whole thing is so crazy. 1.00

00:19:38.000 It's so crazy.

00:19:39.000 It's so crazy because there's so many of them and then nobody talks about it.

00:19:43.000 The other ones don't talk about it because then you look at the list and it's like black. 1.00

00:19:45.000 It's bipartisan.

00:19:46.000 Yeah, it's bold.

00:19:47.000 Here we go.

00:19:48.000 It's blue.

00:19:49.000 It's red.

00:19:50.000 Some of the Republicans are making the most.

00:19:52.000 Oh, yeah.

00:19:52.000 Congress and their spouses be banned from trading in No, I don't know to the second one.

00:20:01.000 Any, we have a responsibility to report in the stock, on the stock, but I don't, I'm not familiar with that five month view, but if people aren't reporting, they should be.

00:20:15.000 Because this is a free market and people We're a free market economy that should be able to participate in that. 0.99

00:20:22.000 That's such bullshit! 0.99

00:20:24.000 Like, saying that it's a free market when you know... 1.00

00:20:30.000 You're going to pass laws, and those laws are going to affect the company.

00:20:32.000 It's going to make the stock go up.

00:20:34.000 That's crazy!

00:20:36.000 Okay, yeah, that is a free market, I guess, for you.

00:20:39.000 It's not that.

00:20:39.000 It's free for you.

00:20:40.000 Well, that's crazy if you could fucking go to jail for insider trading. 0.99

00:20:44.000 Like, what is that? 0.99

00:20:45.000 What?

00:20:46.000 Come on.

00:20:46.000 What is that?

00:20:47.000 You know, Martha Stewart's watching this like, these motherfuckers. 1.00

00:20:50.000 Well, we figured that out the other day. 1.00

00:20:51.000 Martha Stewart did not go to jail for insider trading.

00:20:53.000 She went to jail for lying to an investigator.

00:20:57.000 She was lying under oath.

00:20:58.000 They all lie, though.

00:21:00.000 She's lying right now.

00:21:01.000 Was she lying under oath, or was she just lying when questioned?

00:21:06.000 Something like that.

00:21:07.000 Yeah, something like that.

00:21:08.000 So that's why she went to jail. 0.99

00:21:09.000 But that's like a little trick they do.

00:21:12.000 You know, they get you to start talking.

00:21:13.000 And then, you know, you don't tell the truth about something.

00:21:16.000 Have you ever talked to Doug?

00:21:17.000 Do you know Doug?

00:21:18.000 Doug?

00:21:19.000 Who's Doug?

00:21:19.000 Yeah.

00:21:21.000 Right away, you're lying.

00:21:23.000 Right away, you're lying.

00:21:24.000 And for her, I don't even think it was a lot of money, which is really crazy.

00:21:28.000 She would have only lost, like, a certain amount of money.

00:21:31.000 She's super duper rich. 1.00

00:21:32.000 Yeah, you're like, huh, who the fuck is Doug? 1.00

00:21:35.000 Fucking, what? 1.00

00:21:36.000 Like, you're lying. 1.00

00:21:37.000 We see you texting Doug right here.

00:21:39.000 Oh, no!

00:21:40.000 Not Doug.

00:21:41.000 And then you think, like, Signal is really encrypted.

00:21:43.000 His name was Douglas. 0.99

00:21:44.000 They're showing you the fucking things from Signal. 0.98

00:21:47.000 Why were you doing it on an encrypted app? 0.99

00:21:49.000 Yeah.

00:21:50.000 How did you read it?

00:21:51.000 Wait a minute. 0.99

00:21:53.000 Just ridiculous. 0.86

00:21:54.000 Do you believe any of these apps are really, truly encrypted? 0.75

00:21:57.000 No, none of them are encrypted.

00:21:58.000 They're all CIA honeypots.

00:22:00.000 They're all honeypots. 1.00

00:22:01.000 I think they are encrypted, but I don't think that matters to the fucking CIA or the NSA or whoever wants to read your shit. 1.00

00:22:08.000 That's like this fucking shooter. 1.00

00:22:08.000 I was like, give me whatever phone that kid has. 1.00

00:22:10.000 Oh, we can't get into it.

00:22:11.000 Yeah, we can't get into his phone. 1.00

00:22:12.000 Like, what the fuck are you talking about, bitch? 1.00

00:22:14.000 You get into Elon Musk's phone. 1.00

00:22:15.000 They got into it.

00:22:16.000 They couldn't get into it on the field, but they went back to Quantico and got the software update, and then they got into it like an hour.

00:22:22.000 Oh, the software update.

00:22:23.000 The old software update.

00:22:25.000 That's what they're calling it these days.

00:22:28.000 The software update!

00:22:30.000 That's how they crashed all the planes the other day or whatever.

00:22:33.000 They were like, oh, it was a software update.

00:22:36.000 It took one software update to stop all global flights?

00:22:41.000 I read the ultimate of ultimate conspiracies.

00:22:44.000 Oh, I want to hear it.

00:22:45.000 Please let America know I've done zero research into this.

00:22:50.000 And I just saw a tweet.

00:22:52.000 And the tweet was essentially saying that this company was owned by a Ukrainian billionaire.

00:23:00.000 Oh, here we go.

00:23:01.000 It's Zelensky.

00:23:02.000 That this company that...

00:23:04.000 What's it called?

00:23:05.000 CrowdStrike?

00:23:06.000 CrowdStrike. 0.99

00:23:06.000 That crashed the entire internet for all the fucking airlines. 0.99

00:23:11.000 Was owned by some rich Ukrainian guy. 0.99

00:23:13.000 This was like this grand conspiracy.

00:23:15.000 There's so many good conspiracies going on.

00:23:17.000 If you're into conspiracies, it's like murder mystery podcasts.

00:23:21.000 No, it's like that meme with the guy from where it's like...

00:23:25.000 There's so many.

00:23:27.000 And by the way, so many of them have become...

00:23:30.000 How about the phone call?

00:23:32.000 Which phone call?

00:23:33.000 The phone call with Kamala Harris and he's on speakerphone.

00:23:36.000 But they found him now.

00:23:38.000 Allegedly!

00:23:39.000 No, there's video.

00:23:41.000 Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

00:23:44.000 Listen, I'm not saying that he's not really, that's not really Joe Biden.

00:23:50.000 That's a guy in a CIA makeup suit walking up the stairs.

00:23:53.000 I'm not saying that.

00:23:55.000 But they can do that.

00:23:57.000 Wait, so what's the conspiracy about CrowdStrike that I don't understand?

00:24:01.000 I don't know.

00:24:02.000 I didn't read into it.

00:24:03.000 I know.

00:24:03.000 I never did.

00:24:04.000 That it's owned by some Ukrainian billionaire.

00:24:06.000 It's like, dude, you know, there's ties to Joe Biden.

00:24:10.000 I love how it's like telephone.

00:24:13.000 Hunter Biden.

00:24:15.000 And there's Ghislaine Maxwell in the planes.

00:24:18.000 It's like...

00:24:19.000 Jesus Christ!

00:24:20.000 I can't keep up with the season!

00:24:22.000 I can't.

00:24:23.000 The season, every night when the episode ends, I sit in my couch and I go, what are they gonna do next?

00:24:29.000 You're like, I'm afraid to turn it off.

00:24:31.000 I was talking to my sister on the way and I was like, and she was going off about something and she's like, I was like, oh, did you see that this kid might have had ties to the FBI? She's like, he did?

00:24:43.000 I'm like, I don't know.

00:24:44.000 I saw a tweet, but I'm just gonna tell you that Yeah, let's send it to Jamie for further investigation.

00:24:49.000 So the allegation is that this kid had been visited multiple times.

00:24:55.000 See, they got cell phone data, so they got geo-tracking data, and some phone had been visiting him and going back to Washington DC on multiple times.

00:25:11.000 And that this thing had been happening near the FBI location.

00:25:19.000 I know I have it here somewhere.

00:25:21.000 I know I have it saved. 0.99

00:25:22.000 But goddammit, so many people are sending me this shit today that I can't keep up. 0.99

00:25:26.000 I'm sure, I'm sure. 0.99

00:25:27.000 Oh, it's Tim.

00:25:28.000 Tim sent it here.

00:25:29.000 Me and Tim Dillon are going back and forth all day on conspiracies.

00:25:34.000 That's like Landau and I, Dave Landau, all day long.

00:25:37.000 He's a fun dude.

00:25:38.000 Oh my god, my favorite human.

00:25:40.000 One of my favorite humans.

00:25:42.000 He's just a good...

00:25:43.000 When I got back into comedy, he started letting me open for him, and his crowds are amazing, first of all.

00:25:49.000 The guy's been on the road for like 20 years but watching him it's like he's good at everything I don't understand he's gonna act out he's good at crowd work he's good at like coming up with shit that day from the news cycle like the guy is like it's actually he's one of the most underrated comic well I think there's a lot of comics that for whatever reason they never caught a break they never caught a thing that got them out there that people got to see him but they're really good He's

00:26:19.000 doing Mothership, though.

00:26:21.000 I'm excited.

00:26:21.000 Oh yeah, he's doing it.

00:26:22.000 The weekend a friend of mine was gone.

00:26:23.000 I'm opening for him.

00:26:24.000 She was telling me that it's in October.

00:26:26.000 It's the end of August.

00:26:28.000 Oh.

00:26:29.000 Yeah.

00:26:30.000 Right, right, right.

00:26:31.000 Last weekend in August.

00:26:32.000 September 1st is when my friend's going.

00:26:34.000 Yeah.

00:26:34.000 It's going to be fun.

00:26:35.000 Yeah.

00:26:36.000 He's just like a joy to watch.

00:26:37.000 And his humor is so dark.

00:26:39.000 Well, he's a good dude to hang out with, too.

00:26:40.000 He's so good.

00:26:41.000 Oh, here it is.

00:26:42.000 He's a good person.

00:26:42.000 Oh, my God.

00:26:43.000 This needs to be shared everywhere immediately.

00:26:45.000 The Heritage Foundation.

00:26:46.000 First of all, red flags all over the place.

00:26:50.000 First of all, what's the Heritage Foundation?

00:26:52.000 They're like the, you know, Project 2025 people, I think.

00:26:55.000 Oh, I love it.

00:26:57.000 They got Jesus on speed dial.

00:26:59.000 The Heritage Foundation just released cell phone data of a mysterious figure who made frequent trips between Trump shooter Thomas Matthew Crook's home and a building in D.C. near an FBI office.

00:27:11.000 Well, you know what?

00:27:12.000 My house is fairly close to a taco deli, but there's really no connection.

00:27:18.000 What does that mean?

00:27:20.000 You know what I'm saying?

00:27:21.000 I love it.

00:27:22.000 Nine devices were identified in the analysis linking to both his home and work.

00:27:26.000 Oh.

00:27:27.000 How does that data get out?

00:27:29.000 Well, let's find out, Jamie.

00:27:30.000 So here's the thing.

00:27:32.000 I had this guy on my podcast, Walk-Ins Welcome, back during the BLM stuff, and he said all of it... 0.83

00:27:41.000 Jamie, get back to it.

00:27:41.000 Open the link.

00:27:44.000 There's no link?

00:27:44.000 No.

00:27:45.000 I went to this oversight committee's plate.

00:27:46.000 I was looking for their original tweets about it.

00:27:48.000 Do they have...

00:27:49.000 The Heritage Foundation has a post about it on their website?

00:27:52.000 I never saw it from Heritage Foundation.

00:27:54.000 Can you go there without catching braces?

00:27:55.000 Oh, you know the guy I had.

00:27:57.000 Coach T. Oh, okay. 0.97

00:27:58.000 So I had him on my podcast and he said all the guys who were marching in BLM were either homosexuals or actors. 0.96

00:28:07.000 He's like, there are no black men who are marching in this. 0.90

00:28:10.000 And he was like, not like... 0.90

00:28:12.000 Like, heterosexual black men. 0.98

00:28:14.000 That's hilarious. 0.73

00:28:15.000 He said this.

00:28:15.000 I lost a sponsor for it.

00:28:16.000 Whoa.

00:28:17.000 Because Coach T said that?

00:28:18.000 You lost a sponsor?

00:28:19.000 Yeah.

00:28:19.000 Were you supposed to edit that out?

00:28:21.000 I don't know.

00:28:22.000 Can't people have opinions? 0.67

00:28:22.000 Well, he's a black man! 0.67

00:28:24.000 He can't say what he... 0.61

00:28:25.000 Also, he's funny.

00:28:26.000 Saying something funny.

00:28:26.000 He's also hilarious.

00:28:27.000 And he probably laughed when he said it, right?

00:28:28.000 Then the cell phone data came out because they can track all of us all the time, and it turned out it was like he was deadly accurate.

00:28:36.000 It was like...

00:28:38.000 Misinformation!

00:28:39.000 He said, are people confused about their identity?

00:28:42.000 That's what he said.

00:28:43.000 He said, don't. 0.94

00:28:44.000 People in entertainment, homosexuals, are people confused about their identity. 1.00

00:28:50.000 That's hilarious.

00:28:51.000 What is this, Jamie?

00:28:52.000 Heritage Foundation tweeted this oversight project thing that says, assassination info drop.

00:28:59.000 So it says four hours of congressional testimony later, and we still have more information about the assassination attempt on former President Trump from X and oversight PR than the Secret Service, DHS, or the FBI. We found the assassin's connections through our in-depth analysis of mobile ad data tracker to track the movements of Crooks and his associates.

00:29:21.000 Wow.

00:29:22.000 To do this, we track devices that regularly visited both Crook's home and place of work and followed them.

00:29:28.000 So think about what they're saying here, though.

00:29:31.000 Analysis of mobile ad data.

00:29:33.000 So the ads are tracking you every step of the way, wherever you are.

00:29:38.000 And it's just open about it.

00:29:40.000 When my husband was...

00:29:41.000 The ads outed my husband looking for a ring for me.

00:29:46.000 I started getting ads for rings. 1.00

00:29:49.000 It's creepy shit. 0.99

00:29:51.000 Well, we were talking about the other day, Jamie, what was, oh, purses. 0.99

00:29:54.000 So, someone was explaining to me, my wife is explaining to me, like, what purses and why people like certain purses, and some purses are, like, exclusive, like, you have to develop a relationship.

00:30:06.000 They're an investment!

00:30:06.000 Yeah, you have to develop a relationship with the person selling the purse in order to get one of those purses.

00:30:10.000 You can't even get the ones that are on the shelf.

00:30:11.000 I can't go buy that?

00:30:12.000 No.

00:30:12.000 Like, it's like Rolex is like that.

00:30:14.000 If you go into a Rolex store, you can't just buy a Rolex.

00:30:16.000 Like, no, no, no, sir.

00:30:17.000 No.

00:30:18.000 We don't have anything for sale.

00:30:19.000 You have a giant store! 0.99

00:30:20.000 What the fuck is this? 0.99

00:30:21.000 So I was talking about it with her, and then all of a sudden I started getting these purse ads on my Google. 1.00

00:30:26.000 She knows what she's doing.

00:30:27.000 So it's listening.

00:30:28.000 But it's just listening.

00:30:30.000 And we just accept that.

00:30:31.000 But it also knows who's in the same room together.

00:30:34.000 So I knew my husband was looking for rings for me, and then I started getting ads for the ring. 0.99

00:30:40.000 It's a dirty rat. 1.00

00:30:41.000 It's a fucking rat. 1.00

00:30:42.000 But the thing is, like, how do they get that data? 1.00

00:30:45.000 I think that's, like, the...

00:30:46.000 Publicly available?

00:30:47.000 Yeah, a lot of it, I think, or you pay.

00:30:49.000 I think you pay.

00:30:51.000 So you can pay and then plug in a phone number?

00:30:54.000 I've thought about asking you if we can do an investigation like this just for funsies to see, like, what data can we get?

00:30:59.000 Yeah, let's do that.

00:31:00.000 Let's track Jamie all day long.

00:31:02.000 Let's see which massage parlor Jamie's going to to get that. 1.00

00:31:05.000 We can pick someone.

00:31:06.000 Happy ending.

00:31:07.000 Some willing participant.

00:31:09.000 I mean, for real, but that's creepy because then they just have to find your phone number, Jamie, and they'll know what your route is based on ad tracking data, which is crazy.

00:31:20.000 That seems like a huge security liability.

00:31:23.000 I was talking to someone out in the lobby, the new journal app on the iPhone, which is probably iOS 17 or 18. It keeps giving me prompts.

00:31:32.000 Oh, fuck that thing. 1.00

00:31:33.000 Write in your journal. 1.00

00:31:35.000 I was looking through it yesterday.

00:31:36.000 It's broken down by where I go, what I was doing there, and then it knows.

00:31:41.000 It's like, do you want to write about your golf day at this place for Monday?

00:31:45.000 You were out to lunch here.

00:31:46.000 How about your day at work with Marshall and the dogs?

00:31:48.000 It's like, what the Dirty little spy.

00:31:50.000 How does that work?

00:31:51.000 Dirty little spy.

00:31:52.000 I wrote a whole piece about those menstrual tracking apps because I had one back when I was dating my husband and then I was like, hey, can I sign you up just to see how weird this is? 0.99

00:32:02.000 And he's like, this is fucking creepy.

00:32:04.000 I don't want to know that you're in your luteal phase or whatever and I have to be nice to you. 0.97

00:32:09.000 And it gives him tips.

00:32:12.000 Oh no, not tips.

00:32:13.000 You know what would be great though?

00:32:14.000 If you had a real female heavy government And, you know, they would all have coinciding menstrual cycles if they all work together all the time. 1.00

00:32:23.000 And then you could, like, get all their data and figure out exactly when this shit is about to hit the fan. 0.99

00:32:29.000 And you could, like, run the stock market that way. 0.99

00:32:32.000 You could, like, make bets. 1.00

00:32:33.000 Because when the shit's gonna hit the fan, they're gonna be fucking angry. 0.99

00:32:36.000 Things are gonna go sideways. 0.99

00:32:37.000 You're gonna have a dip in productivity.

00:32:39.000 You're gonna have people resigning.

00:32:41.000 Something's gonna go wrong.

00:32:42.000 This is all the stuff the left is very worried about with like J.D. Vance because allegedly he's like big and I don't know if this is true.

00:32:49.000 America, I don't know if this is true.

00:32:50.000 He's allegedly into like the menstrual tracking and you know these billionaires are getting behind these apps so that they can like and there's a lot of fear.

00:32:59.000 What do they want from that? 0.95

00:33:00.000 There's a lot of fear with like the states that don't allow abortion because now they want to like pull up your You know, records and see if you might, I don't fucking know.

00:33:11.000 I read these things and I'm like, I never, I don't know what's true or not or what's just being like, you know, just hyperbolic so that people freak out about this stuff.

00:33:21.000 But there's, yeah, there's a whole industry in this now.

00:33:26.000 Like a whole menstrual tracking.

00:33:29.000 Jesus Christ.

00:33:32.000 I was listening to a podcast the other day and I never knew why women's cycles synced up.

00:33:39.000 But here's my question.

00:33:39.000 What do they want from it?

00:33:40.000 What do they want from that data?

00:33:42.000 What?

00:33:43.000 What are these guys that are tracking menstrual cycles?

00:33:46.000 Well, it's generally presented as something that's good for the women because then you can like eat and work out with your cycle because if you are in perimenopause or premenopause or you're like in the prime of your life, you want to do different things at different times in your cycle and different foods are better. 0.99

00:34:02.000 Right.

00:34:02.000 Like hormones for women are nuts.

00:34:04.000 Dudes just have like what?

00:34:05.000 You've got one?

00:34:07.000 Yeah.

00:34:08.000 Women have like three that are constantly interacting and all it's so depending on what they just haven't done as many studies so now they're trying to say like oh it's good to know where you are so that you can support yourself allegedly all these guys want this for like Handmaid's Tale? 0.93

00:34:25.000 I don't know.

00:34:26.000 That's what I'm asking.

00:34:27.000 What do the guys want it for?

00:34:28.000 This is a conspiracy.

00:34:29.000 The article I'm reading says that there was a new regulation.

00:34:34.000 HHS finalized a new regulation under HIPAA to limit law enforcement access to medical records tied to reproductive health.

00:34:39.000 So they go all the way down to saying local police agencies might simply take it upon themselves to pull the records to see who had unexplained disruptions in their menstrual cycles.

00:34:48.000 To find out if someone crossed state borders.

00:34:50.000 To go get an abortion. 1.00

00:34:51.000 Yeah.

00:34:52.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:34:53.000 Okay.

00:34:54.000 It's nuts.

00:34:55.000 Ooh.

00:34:56.000 Yeah.

00:34:57.000 Mm-hmm.

00:34:58.000 Oh, my God.

00:35:00.000 Imagine your own menstrual cycle isn't private information?

00:35:05.000 Nothing's private.

00:35:06.000 But imagine that.

00:35:07.000 Yeah.

00:35:07.000 Imagine, like, someone can sneak in and say, what happened?

00:35:11.000 And you have to explain you had a fucking miscarriage to some asshole who's accusing you of driving to Ohio or wherever the fuck you'd have to go. 1.00

00:35:19.000 Imagine? 1.00

00:35:20.000 Yeah.

00:35:20.000 Just imagine those conversations if you're a person who had a miscarriage.

00:35:24.000 Oh, yeah.

00:35:25.000 I mean, these are happening. 1.00

00:35:27.000 Imagine if you're married and happy and you were trying to have a kid and you had a miscarriage and some fucking asshole is at your front door accusing you of getting an abortion and you have to deal with this Christian fucking cult member with a clipboard, you know? 1.00

00:35:43.000 Aggressively accusing you of killing your baby. 1.00

00:35:46.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:35:47.000 It stems from what they call the Dobbs decision, which changes the rights of states.

00:35:53.000 So Dobbs decision tore away the constitutional right to privacy and bodily autonomy by giving states increased rights to limit and even outlaw abortions.

00:36:01.000 Fortunately, the decision did not ban abortions nationwide.

00:36:05.000 So then they were saying that some of these new regulations could allow them to go even further and check, like do whatever they have to do to check, kind of.

00:36:12.000 They're trying to stop that.

00:36:13.000 Isn't it crazy that one of our biggest arguments as a country is whether or not you should be allowed to kill a baby? 0.86

00:36:24.000 Isn't that crazy? 0.86

00:36:25.000 I love you.

00:36:26.000 That really is what it is.

00:36:29.000 And I'm not a pro-life person.

00:36:33.000 I don't think it's my decision.

00:36:36.000 I don't think I have the right.

00:36:37.000 It's too weird.

00:36:38.000 Especially if I'm not involved.

00:36:40.000 I'm a politician.

00:36:41.000 I'm looking at a person and deciding whether or not they should have to have that baby or not.

00:36:46.000 It seems crazy because it seems like...

00:36:49.000 It's one of those weird human things where, are you saying the moment of conception it's a baby?

00:36:55.000 Like if it's three cells and you know for a fact that that's when you can't shut that down? 0.88

00:37:00.000 But then, if you ever go to the bodies exhibit, that fucking creepy exhibit that I talk about, and they have babies. 0.97

00:37:07.000 They have babies at every stage. 0.96

00:37:09.000 You see them at six weeks, eight weeks, ten weeks.

00:37:12.000 First of all, How'd you get those?

00:37:15.000 I don't want to know.

00:37:17.000 Second of all, it really puts it in perspective and it changes this idea.

00:37:23.000 Just putting it in a box, a woman's right to choose. 1.00

00:37:25.000 Right, yeah, definitely.

00:37:26.000 Not by place.

00:37:28.000 But look at that.

00:37:29.000 Look what we're saying.

00:37:30.000 Look what we're saying, the choices.

00:37:32.000 Look what we're advocating for.

00:37:34.000 I think most Americans—like, when you poll Americans, it's very much, I think, where I end up landing, they're squishy on it, and it's like pro-life in the sheets—like, pro-choice in the streets, pro-life in the sheets.

00:37:48.000 Like, a lot of women are like, I wouldn't get an abortion, but I don't want to— Stop someone else from doing that. 1.00

00:37:56.000 And then there's this slippery slope of allowing people to tell you you can't get an abortion.

00:38:01.000 Especially allowing men to tell women that they're not even remotely connected to.

00:38:05.000 That they can't have an abortion.

00:38:06.000 It's like a weird body autonomy thing.

00:38:09.000 And it's like That's what I mean.

00:38:11.000 And a lot of them want to disclude crazy things, like a child that is never going to live, like unviable.

00:38:18.000 Or it could be a threat to the woman.

00:38:19.000 There's some sort of a medical issue.

00:38:21.000 It could be a threat to the woman's life unless they abort the baby. 1.00

00:38:24.000 And even then, they're like, no.

00:38:26.000 Let God sort it out.

00:38:27.000 Well, they'll make exceptions for this, allegedly.

00:38:32.000 But the doctors are worried often about losing their license in states where it's highly regulated.

00:38:37.000 So you end up...

00:38:38.000 Sketchy.

00:38:39.000 Yeah, it's sketchy.

00:38:40.000 And I don't think, like, you know, it's a slippery slope to, like, get the jab, too.

00:38:46.000 You know, I don't think you have to have some kind of bodily autonomy.

00:38:51.000 But I understand the argument, too, from the moral perspective.

00:38:54.000 I had this woman, Inez Stepman, on my podcast, and she's brilliant.

00:38:58.000 And she was like, you know, it's a hard conversation because it is a moral...

00:39:03.000 If you're not conflicted about it, you're not thinking deeply about it.

00:39:08.000 Because it is a life, and as someone like Ben Shapiro would say, left untouched, that would be a baby.

00:39:16.000 And I think, was it Burr who had that brilliant bit?

00:39:21.000 Brilliant bit.

00:39:22.000 Brilliant bit.

00:39:22.000 Yeah.

00:39:23.000 Louis has a brilliant bit on it, too.

00:39:26.000 It's complicated.

00:39:27.000 It's complicated.

00:39:28.000 There's no getting around that fact.

00:39:29.000 I understand the fight for it, you know, if that is where you lie. 0.99

00:39:33.000 Yeah, but this thing of having people track your fucking cycle. 0.99

00:39:38.000 Yeah, no, the cycle. 1.00

00:39:39.000 And having like crazy like bow tie wearing Christian guys do it. 1.00

00:39:44.000 You know what I'm saying?

00:39:44.000 I just love that in your mind they're like these like, hello!

00:39:47.000 Pray the gay away type dudes. 1.00

00:39:48.000 Pray the gay away. 1.00

00:39:49.000 You know, there's, you know, they can, they mask themselves in A blanket of virtue through religion the same way a lot of woke people do by being mean cunts and thinking they're doing it to be like progressive. 0.99

00:40:04.000 Well, they have their own version of Pray the Gay Way. 1.00

00:40:06.000 It's the same.

00:40:06.000 Yeah, they do.

00:40:07.000 But they're doing what they're doing by wrapping themselves up in these ideas of Christianity.

00:40:12.000 It's just allowing like people's worst instincts to We're good to go.

00:40:33.000 It is very strange to think.

00:40:35.000 I don't know.

00:40:37.000 Are there, other than like the jab, when people were like, you gotta get the jab.

00:40:41.000 I can't think of, I don't know, and maybe I'm wrong.

00:40:45.000 Is there like a comparable scenario where men's bodies are kind of like this battlefield?

00:40:51.000 None.

00:40:52.000 Nothing.

00:40:52.000 Nothing remotely close.

00:40:53.000 Yeah.

00:40:54.000 Nothing's remotely close.

00:40:55.000 And again...

00:40:56.000 No one has any control over men's bodies.

00:40:58.000 I mean, the only thing they can tell you is don't take steroids, which they do.

00:41:03.000 But who's going to jail for that?

00:41:05.000 Yeah.

00:41:06.000 And also there's testosterone therapy that people get.

00:41:09.000 Yeah.

00:41:10.000 It's not steroids, but no one's stopping you from doing that because it's beneficial and helps people.

00:41:15.000 Testosterone sounds awesome.

00:41:16.000 It's great.

00:41:16.000 It's great stuff.

00:41:17.000 It helps people.

00:41:18.000 It helps your body retain its vitality. 1.00

00:41:21.000 And you don't want a broken down, old, fucking shitty body. 1.00

00:41:24.000 It's really that simple. 1.00

00:41:25.000 And everybody attaches testosterone to douchebaggishness, and I totally get. 1.00

00:41:30.000 I totally get where that's coming from. 0.98

00:41:32.000 Douchebaggery, shitty behavior, unnecessary aggression. 0.99

00:41:36.000 Yes, 100%. 0.99

00:41:38.000 But not always.

00:41:39.000 And it's like all things.

00:41:40.000 It's like, yeah, cars, people drive recklessly and they drive drunk and they cause accidents.

00:41:45.000 Right.

00:41:46.000 But not always.

00:41:47.000 So let's not ban cars.

00:41:48.000 Let's not automatically assume that all things masculine are bad.

00:41:54.000 No. 1.00

00:41:54.000 This is a stupid thing. 1.00

00:41:56.000 It's so unhealthy, too. 1.00

00:41:59.000 Also, ladies, that's what you like. 1.00

00:42:01.000 That is what you like.

00:42:03.000 Ladies.

00:42:04.000 I know you don't want to admit it, but that's what you like.

00:42:06.000 You just like it when it's nice.

00:42:08.000 That's all it is.

00:42:09.000 Kinda, yeah.

00:42:09.000 Yeah.

00:42:10.000 You just don't want it mean.

00:42:11.000 And you don't want it ruining civilization.

00:42:13.000 And that's what it does.

00:42:15.000 Because it ruins civilization.

00:42:17.000 Like, if wars were all women, there'd be no fights. 1.00

00:42:20.000 There'd be very few.

00:42:21.000 There'd be a few brawls in, like, Wendy's at 2 o'clock in the morning.

00:42:25.000 There would be no real war.

00:42:27.000 It's not the same thing.

00:42:28.000 You know what I'm saying?

00:42:29.000 But I'm saying if there was wars, if entire populations were all women, I mean, no men.

00:42:34.000 Men don't exist. 0.99

00:42:35.000 So women exist only in the form that they exist today, right? 1.00

00:42:38.000 Let's pretend they don't need men. 1.00

00:42:39.000 And they just exist like this. 0.99

00:42:41.000 There'd be fucking zero war. 0.95

00:42:42.000 What do you think about this argument, though, that the other thing that's destroying civilization right now is not having enough men dying in wars? 0.99

00:42:51.000 Boo! 0.83

00:42:52.000 Like you have all these men who generally would be kind of sacrificed in these wars historically, and now they're all just like keyboard warriors who hate, you know, their incels basically.

00:43:05.000 There's an argument that people make about like, we need to put them back in the coal mines, they need to like get back to...

00:43:12.000 I've got a much easier solution.

00:43:14.000 Jiu-jitsu.

00:43:15.000 Yeah, or that.

00:43:16.000 It should be mandatory.

00:43:17.000 You know how you learn how to read?

00:43:18.000 You should learn how to strangle people. 0.99

00:43:20.000 Both sexes. 0.99

00:43:22.000 Yes, definitely.

00:43:24.000 Well, jujitsu is the absolute best self-defense for women. 1.00

00:43:27.000 For women.

00:43:28.000 100%. 1.00

00:43:29.000 There are women that are 130 pounds that can put you to fucking sleep if you're a big grown man. 1.00

00:43:35.000 They will fucking strangle you. 1.00

00:43:37.000 They will take your back, you won't be able to stop it, and they will get their hooks in and they'll put you to sleep. 1.00

00:43:41.000 Yeah.

00:43:42.000 That's a 100% fact.

00:43:44.000 You just need a fighting chance to get away. 0.84

00:43:47.000 Yeah, yeah, but you you also need to be able to defend yourself and like one of the best things about jujitsu is the guard and Learning how to fight off of your back now if you're a woman and some guy takes you down and tackles you Learning how to effectively defend yourself off your back is fucking huge.

00:44:03.000 Yeah, it's absolutely huge because technique can overcome physical strength Yeah, it really can especially in that position I want to get back into it. 0.79

00:44:12.000 Because they learn how to shield with their shins. 0.98

00:44:15.000 They learn how to grab at the biceps and the shoulders and prevent you from using your strength.

00:44:21.000 They learn how to get under hooks and to go behind you.

00:44:23.000 They learn how to defend themselves.

00:44:26.000 Do you know if there's a place in Austin that does women's self-defense? 0.99

00:44:29.000 100%.

00:44:30.000 Well, we don't want women's self-defense. 1.00

00:44:32.000 I'm not disparaging women's self-defense classes, but what my feeling is is that you should learn how to actually fight. 0.96

00:44:40.000 I used to teach Taekwondo at Boston University and then they had this women's self-defense class that they were going to do there too. 0.75

00:44:48.000 And I got a chance to watch it.

00:44:52.000 And I was like, none of this is going to work.

00:44:53.000 No, this is going to work.

00:44:54.000 When I was taking a Gracie in Beverly Hills, it was jujitsu, but it was specifically like you get grabbed from behind.

00:45:03.000 Oh, yeah.

00:45:03.000 The Gracies do a different thing, though.

00:45:05.000 Yeah.

00:45:05.000 So you were learning how to fight, but it was specifically like generally you're in a car.

00:45:10.000 This is the reason why I'm saying this.

00:45:13.000 Knowing how to do something is not enough.

00:45:15.000 It's just not enough.

00:45:16.000 You have to train it.

00:45:17.000 Right.

00:45:17.000 It has to be automatic.

00:45:19.000 Yes.

00:45:20.000 You have to train it all the time.

00:45:22.000 Yeah.

00:45:22.000 If you don't train it all the time, when the thing happens, you'll have to think.

00:45:26.000 You don't want to have to think, right?

00:45:28.000 No, it has to be like muscle memory.

00:45:30.000 Yes.

00:45:30.000 Yeah.

00:45:30.000 One of the best things about jiu-jitsu is when you're rolling in the class, the person who you are sparring against is generally going close to 100% of their strength.

00:45:42.000 Right.

00:45:42.000 When there's certain positions, like there's certain things that they're doing to you where they are using all their might to try to achieve a dominant position, a passing of a guard, you know, a finishing up of a submission, they're closing up a submission.

00:45:56.000 You're accustomed to that.

00:45:58.000 So it's a normal thing.

00:45:59.000 When you do sparring and karate class, you kind of touch each other. 0.90

00:46:04.000 So when somebody really fucking blasts you, you're not used to that. 0.87

00:46:08.000 You might freak out. 0.99

00:46:10.000 Jiu Jitsu, it becomes automatic.

00:46:12.000 It's the absolute best martial art for people because if you're in a physical struggle with someone, if some guy grabs you at a bar and the bar table behind you falls over and you're on your back, You know exactly what to do.

00:46:26.000 You don't even think.

00:46:27.000 You're in the middle of chaos, and it's as easy as tying your shoe.

00:46:30.000 You know exactly what to do, but it's because you've done it a thousand times.

00:46:33.000 This is like shooting, though, too.

00:46:35.000 It's why you've got to train.

00:46:36.000 You should train everything.

00:46:37.000 Everything you do that's important to you.

00:46:40.000 Everything.

00:46:41.000 It's stand-up comedy.

00:46:42.000 You have to do a lot of sets.

00:46:43.000 If you don't do a lot of sets, you don't feel sharp.

00:46:45.000 You have to feel sharp.

00:46:46.000 It's been so fun to get back because I kind of convinced myself maybe I just had a 10-year phase.

00:46:58.000 Of comedy?

00:46:59.000 No.

00:46:59.000 And then my friend Ariel Isaac Norman, who runs a Gay Enough show, she's amazing.

00:47:05.000 And she was like, just come do one set and see how you feel.

00:47:08.000 And I was like, I don't know.

00:47:09.000 I'm a mom now.

00:47:10.000 Yeah.

00:47:11.000 Maybe that was just my lesbian summer that I had or whatever. 0.98

00:47:15.000 And she was like, just try it and see.

00:47:17.000 She's like, you can lie to yourself about this, but once you're a comedian, good luck getting that out.

00:47:23.000 And once I got up, I was like, goddammit, I gotta do this now.

00:47:27.000 And it's not something you can just do.

00:47:31.000 You've gotta do it.

00:47:33.000 Well, also, you feel the puzzle again.

00:47:35.000 I love the puzzle!

00:47:37.000 You feel the puzzle, you go on stage, you're working the puzzle out, and you're like, okay, I'm in.

00:47:41.000 It's so humbling, too. 0.99

00:47:43.000 I just love eating shit and being like, I don't know, it was funny. 0.99

00:47:47.000 Someone was like, why are you doing that? 0.99

00:47:48.000 I'm like, well, I can either be a successful pundit or a failed comedian, and I'd rather be a failed comedian.

00:47:55.000 Well, even the successful pundit is not mutually exclusive.

00:47:59.000 No, I know.

00:47:59.000 Look at Jimmy Dore.

00:48:00.000 He does both.

00:48:00.000 Jimmy's great, though.

00:48:02.000 He's smart, though.

00:48:03.000 He's such a funny stand-up, too.

00:48:04.000 Yeah.

00:48:05.000 He did stand-up at the club when he was in town doing my podcast.

00:48:07.000 I haven't seen him live in forever.

00:48:10.000 He was really funny.

00:48:12.000 Yeah.

00:48:12.000 He was really sharp.

00:48:13.000 Yep.

00:48:14.000 Yeah, it's been...

00:48:15.000 Such a nice guy, too.

00:48:16.000 Yeah, I've always wanted to...

00:48:18.000 I don't know him.

00:48:18.000 I've always wanted to meet him.

00:48:19.000 He's a sweetheart.

00:48:20.000 Yeah.

00:48:20.000 He's a really nice guy.

00:48:22.000 I like him a lot.

00:48:23.000 Every interaction I've had with him has been pleasant.

00:48:26.000 That guy goes hard.

00:48:29.000 He goes so hard.

00:48:31.000 He knows a lot, though.

00:48:32.000 He does.

00:48:33.000 He's ruined Kurt Metzger.

00:48:36.000 Why?

00:48:37.000 Kurt Metzger is so far down the conspiracy rabbit hole now.

00:48:41.000 Oh, I know. 1.00

00:48:41.000 Every fucking conspiracy Kurt Metzger's balls in. 1.00

00:48:44.000 Oh, yeah. 0.99

00:48:45.000 And he just freaked out by everything because he didn't know all this stuff until he started working with Jimmy.

00:48:50.000 He started working with Jim and he's like, Jesus Christ!

00:48:53.000 And now he's just like, he's just in. 0.97

00:48:55.000 Every time I find anything that's fucked up, I send it to him to get him worked up. 0.94

00:49:00.000 Kurt? 0.98

00:49:00.000 Yes! 0.98

00:49:02.000 And he sends me like these walls of text.

00:49:05.000 You want to see these walls of text?

00:49:06.000 I love him.

00:49:07.000 Have you ever seen them?

00:49:07.000 No.

00:49:07.000 Have you ever been texting with Kurt?

00:49:08.000 I wish.

00:49:09.000 Let me show you a Kurt Mesker wall of text.

00:49:11.000 When they were here doing their show.

00:49:13.000 Look at these walls of text.

00:49:14.000 Look at these.

00:49:15.000 Look at these walls of texts.

00:49:18.000 Watch these.

00:49:19.000 I'll get you a good one here.

00:49:20.000 Here we go.

00:49:20.000 Here's a good one.

00:49:21.000 Look at this wall.

00:49:22.000 Oh, wow.

00:49:24.000 Here's another good one.

00:49:25.000 Here's another good wall.

00:49:26.000 He'll just go at you. 0.90

00:49:29.000 That guy's like a joke-writing machine, though.

00:49:31.000 He's a genius.

00:49:31.000 No, he's a genius.

00:49:32.000 I mean, his mind just...

00:49:34.000 He has a, like...

00:49:36.000 You know when they open Dan?

00:49:37.000 Whee! 1.00

00:49:38.000 That's what it's like.

00:49:39.000 Do you sleep?

00:49:40.000 He just goes so hard.

00:49:42.000 He's such a great joke writer. 0.98

00:49:44.000 It's such a fun dude to hang out with, but the tweet walls are fucking insane.

00:49:48.000 Their thing that they did at Mothership that he and Kyle did. 1.00

00:49:53.000 That shit is genius, too. 0.98

00:49:56.000 Donagin is one of those guys where you want to talk about someone who's not appreciated for how good he is and a true genius. 1.00

00:50:02.000 His face swaps of Trump.

00:50:04.000 Did you ever see the one with Trump and Caitlyn Jenner? 0.98

00:50:06.000 They're having sex? 0.98

00:50:07.000 No!

00:50:08.000 I think that was the one that they wouldn't let on Comedy Central.

00:50:11.000 Because, you know, briefly, he was going to do a thing on Comedy Central with the face swaps, but they're too good on Instagram.

00:50:19.000 They're too good.

00:50:20.000 Like, he's too free.

00:50:21.000 And the craziness is the freedom.

00:50:24.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:50:25.000 Did you ever see the one where Caitlyn Jenner was explaining about her new vagina that she got to the girls and how she masturbates with it with a weed whacker? 1.00

00:50:36.000 The whole thing is so horrible. 1.00

00:50:39.000 It's so crazy.

00:50:41.000 And the girls are like, what? 1.00

00:50:43.000 Have you seen it?

00:50:45.000 He's got the Kardashians in the background.

00:50:47.000 Find that, please, Jamie.

00:50:49.000 They were so good.

00:50:50.000 He does the best Caitlyn Jenner. 0.99

00:50:52.000 It's fucking insane. 0.99

00:50:53.000 He does the best Trump. 1.00

00:50:55.000 When they did the land acknowledgement, it was like a picture of you kicking like a...

00:51:02.000 The audience had no idea what to make of this.

00:51:04.000 They're like, what is happening right now?

00:51:06.000 They're like, we need to do a land acknowledgement.

00:51:09.000 It was like watching NPR at Mothership.

00:51:13.000 It was so good.

00:51:14.000 Do you remember when they used to announce what color the clothes they were wearing?

00:51:18.000 Oh, yeah.

00:51:19.000 My pronouns are she, her, and I'm in a blue dress.

00:51:22.000 Didn't Kamala do that? 1.00

00:51:23.000 Yes, yes, yes.

00:51:24.000 They only did it for a few weeks, and they're like, too much, too much!

00:51:27.000 Everybody back out!

00:51:28.000 Back out! 1.00

00:51:29.000 That one was so stupid that even people in their party were like, what the fuck are you doing? 1.00

00:51:35.000 What the fuck are you doing? 1.00

00:51:37.000 That's like if the right-wingers started going, my name is Bob, I'm a patriot, and I believe in Jesus Christ. 1.00

00:51:42.000 Everybody's like, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

00:51:44.000 Bob, we're just talking about the infrastructure.

00:51:46.000 We're just going to fix the road, Bob.

00:51:49.000 Calm down, Bob.

00:51:51.000 My name is Bob.

00:51:52.000 Yeah. 0.70

00:51:53.000 Bob doesn't believe in gays. 0.90

00:51:55.000 Bob doesn't believe in gays. 0.98

00:51:56.000 They just resist, resist, resist. 0.89

00:52:00.000 Do you know that's what Ben Shapiro told me?

00:52:02.000 What?

00:52:03.000 Like, you should just not do it.

00:52:04.000 And that it's like one of those things like you might want to murder someone, but you shouldn't because it's a sin.

00:52:09.000 Like, yo.

00:52:11.000 I think it's...

00:52:12.000 You met any gay guys?

00:52:13.000 You met any gay guys? 1.00

00:52:14.000 Just clench that b-hole and pray. 0.99

00:52:18.000 But first of all, what are they supposed to do?

00:52:20.000 Pretend they like girls? 0.98

00:52:22.000 Have you met gay guys, like actual gay guys?

00:52:25.000 They're real, okay? 1.00

00:52:27.000 It's like thinking that a bear is a fucking teddy bear. 1.00

00:52:29.000 An actual gay guy is a real thing. 1.00

00:52:31.000 Leave them the fuck alone. 1.00

00:52:33.000 Let them fuck guys, you weirdo. 1.00

00:52:35.000 You bow tie wearing clipboard having fucking weirdo. 1.00

00:52:39.000 What do you care? 1.00

00:52:40.000 What do you care? 1.00

00:52:40.000 They want to fuck each other. 1.00

00:52:42.000 Who cares? 1.00

00:52:43.000 I feel like we're surrounded by pearl clutchers. 1.00

00:52:46.000 Everywhere I turn, it's pearl clutchers. 1.00

00:52:49.000 It's also, why is that pleasure so forbidden? 1.00

00:52:52.000 For a lot of people that are pro-lifers, gay sex should be your favorite sex. 1.00

00:52:57.000 Because nobody's going to have a baby and there's going to be no abortions. 1.00

00:53:00.000 You know how many abortions the gay community has? 1.00

00:53:02.000 Fucking zero. 1.00

00:53:04.000 If everyone's going to hell, for sure they should get a pass. 1.00

00:53:07.000 At least they haven't killed any fucking babies, right? 1.00

00:53:09.000 So is it okay if gay guys massage each other? 1.00

00:53:12.000 Is that okay? 0.99

00:53:13.000 Oh, that's fine.

00:53:14.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, you can give each other back rubs and foot rubs and butt rubs. 1.00

00:53:18.000 Fine, but just don't touch the dick. 1.00

00:53:20.000 That's crazy. 1.00

00:53:22.000 That is absolutely crazy. 1.00

00:53:25.000 If you can get a job, if you're a gay dude, you can get a job rubbing backs and butts and feet for $50 an hour, or you could rub dicks for $150. 1.00

00:53:37.000 Like, it seems like it's quicker, you know? 0.99

00:53:39.000 Get to the point.

00:53:40.000 Make your money.

00:53:41.000 Who cares?

00:53:43.000 What do you care?

00:53:43.000 Do you want to touch his feet?

00:53:44.000 You don't, right?

00:53:45.000 You're doing it for money. 1.00

00:53:46.000 You don't want to touch his dick either. 1.00

00:53:48.000 The argument, I guess, would be it was like a slippery slope to all the... 1.00

00:53:51.000 It's prostitution. 1.00

00:53:52.000 ...gender stuff. 0.95

00:53:53.000 Well, it's a slippery slope to...

00:53:55.000 Here it is.

00:53:55.000 I don't know if I found the right one that you want.

00:53:57.000 Let's just try it.

00:53:57.000 Let's just check.

00:53:59.000 Hold on.

00:54:00.000 What is it?

00:54:01.000 We're mad at you.

00:54:02.000 Everything is mad at you.

00:54:04.000 Why? 1.00

00:54:06.000 Ah, shit, I forgot. 1.00

00:54:08.000 We forgot. 1.00

00:54:09.000 Hey, kid!

00:54:10.000 Dad, you need new tennis shorts.

00:54:13.000 Why?

00:54:14.000 It's like everyone could see your hunane today.

00:54:18.000 Oh, maybe because I put too much of Kylie's lip puffer on my lips. 0.99

00:54:22.000 Yeah.

00:54:23.000 That goes on the lips on your face.

00:54:25.000 Are you serious?

00:54:27.000 Eh?

00:54:28.000 I paid 80 grand for that cooch, so maybe everyone should see it.

00:54:31.000 Yeah, baby! 1.00

00:54:33.000 So embarrassing.

00:54:35.000 Oh, you're embarrassed?

00:54:37.000 Let me give you your name real quick. 1.00

00:54:38.000 Hey, look, a picture of the inside of your asshole. 1.00

00:54:40.000 Shut the fuck up, Kim. 1.00

00:54:42.000 Hello? 1.00

00:54:48.000 It's Kim K. I'm at the side door. 0.73

00:54:51.000 Okay, I'll buzz you in.

00:54:53.000 The door is closed.

00:54:56.000 Yeah, you gotta push it.

00:54:58.000 It's locked.

00:55:00.000 Yeah, wait until I buzz you.

00:55:03.000 Okay, push it.

00:55:09.000 Why didn't you open it?

00:55:11.000 There was a weird buzzing noise.

00:55:14.000 Yeah, that means open the door.

00:55:18.000 It's a Bach.

00:55:20.000 You have to wait until I buzz you, Jesus Christ.

00:55:26.000 I love him so much.

00:55:28.000 I love him.

00:55:29.000 It's just not right.

00:55:31.000 This is better than anything that Comedy Central has other than South Park.

00:55:34.000 No.

00:55:34.000 Yeah.

00:55:35.000 And they fucked it up. 0.92

00:55:36.000 Yeah. 0.95

00:55:36.000 And the thing is, when they were doing it over there, here's the problem. 0.95

00:55:40.000 First of all, they were using better technology. 0.56

00:55:43.000 And I think that's one of the things that makes it fun is how shitty it looks.

00:55:47.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 0.87

00:55:48.000 Because you don't really think it's Kim Kardashian.

00:55:49.000 You don't really think it's Caitlyn Jenner.

00:55:52.000 The stuff he does is perfect, and they were doing it with high-end stuff.

00:55:56.000 Oh, right.

00:55:56.000 And it kind of looked creepy.

00:55:58.000 Right, right, right.

00:55:59.000 And I think the one with Caitlyn Jenner having sex with Trump, it might be one of those lost recordings.

00:56:06.000 Maybe he has it.

00:56:07.000 Yeah, I don't think he's ever even released it.

00:56:08.000 It's hilarious.

00:56:10.000 I should ask Marlene.

00:56:11.000 It is hilarious.

00:56:13.000 I bet my friend has it.

00:56:14.000 And I'm pretty sure Trump's on the bottom.

00:56:17.000 Yeah.

00:56:18.000 If I remember correctly.

00:56:20.000 I don't know.

00:56:22.000 These networks are done.

00:56:25.000 Unfortunately, they're hamstrung, right?

00:56:28.000 They're hamstrung by their format.

00:56:30.000 They're hamstrung by the fact that they have to have commercials every five to seven minutes.

00:56:35.000 They're hamstrung by that.

00:56:36.000 Then they're hamstrung by the fact that they're on commercial television.

00:56:39.000 So there's language restrictions and content restrictions.

00:56:42.000 You're not going to take a risk.

00:56:44.000 The people that are the producers and the executives, they're the ones who get to make the decisions as to whether or not you should take a risk.

00:56:50.000 And generally speaking, unless a show is really successful, like South Park.

00:56:55.000 South Park, they stay out of the conversation. 1.00

00:56:57.000 Leave those fucking guys alone. 1.00

00:56:58.000 They're geniuses. 1.00

00:56:59.000 Let them do what they're going to do.

00:57:00.000 And it's going to be amazing.

00:57:02.000 But if you're a beginner, they're not going to do that.

00:57:04.000 No.

00:57:05.000 They're not going to take that chance.

00:57:06.000 And because they're not going to take that chance, because they have this weird relationship with their advertisers and they can't be free, they're never going to be able to compete with someone like Kyle.

00:57:14.000 No!

00:57:14.000 And you would have to offer him a lot of money to even make that worth it.

00:57:20.000 Yeah, but even if you did, you'd have to let him do that.

00:57:23.000 The thing is about Kyle, it's like if Kyle was on the staff of a regular Comedy Central show, you know, as a writer or producer, he would not be able to shine.

00:57:32.000 You've got to leave him alone.

00:57:33.000 Well, this is why I think Shane dodged a huge bullet.

00:57:36.000 Yes.

00:57:36.000 Because, man, how hamstrung he would have been working at SNL. He would have still done his shit.

00:57:43.000 Of course. 1.00

00:57:43.000 He would have gotten heat and people got mad at him, but he would have been the same guy. 1.00

00:57:48.000 Yeah, but I still think like you get reigned, even the one that he did when he was a guest, the funniest sketch of his, they didn't air it.

00:57:56.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:57:57.000 But that's just, they don't want to.

00:57:59.000 There's like, no, there's like real internal cockfighting on that show that people have explained about like whose sketches get picked and whose not get picked and...

00:58:09.000 And there's been a lot of accusations of, like, certain writers taking premises from younger writers.

00:58:14.000 That's what Jim Brewer said.

00:58:15.000 Oh, interesting.

00:58:16.000 Like, they have a database of stuff they're working on, and then someone would just see what you're working on and then steal it.

00:58:21.000 Oh, wow.

00:58:22.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:58:23.000 Phil Hartman told me about that, too.

00:58:24.000 Oh.

00:58:25.000 Yeah, Phil Hartman told me there's all these, like, it's weirdly competitive and backstabby.

00:58:31.000 He was a horror show.

00:58:32.000 Like, when Phil first came over to news radio...

00:58:35.000 It took him a while to just relax and be friends with us.

00:58:38.000 Yeah.

00:58:39.000 Because he almost thought of us as being like fellow cast members on SNL. So this is like this combative sort of distance relationship.

00:58:46.000 Interesting.

00:58:47.000 And the cast of NewsRadio wasn't like that at all.

00:58:49.000 We were all getting drunk together and having fun and laughing.

00:58:54.000 It seems like it's competitive.

00:58:58.000 SNL. Oh, yeah.

00:58:59.000 It's not just competitive.

00:59:01.000 It's like backstabby competitive, according to Jim Brewer.

00:59:04.000 He hated it.

00:59:06.000 He just could not deal with the way that things were done.

00:59:09.000 It's like high pressure, too, and very stressful.

00:59:12.000 It's also a prestigious position that people are fighting for.

00:59:15.000 You're a writer on SNL. You're a producer on SNL. This is like you're in that hungry part of your career where you're making things happen and you're competing with all these other people.

00:59:24.000 When it was good, it was great.

00:59:26.000 Oh, but it's only great when you have wild people who you let do funny things.

00:59:32.000 Yeah.

00:59:33.000 You can't do a lot of the things that they used to do.

00:59:37.000 Oh, God, no.

00:59:38.000 It was like Chevy Chase and Richard Pryor when they were like, I'm going to say a word and tell me what you think.

00:59:42.000 Yeah.

00:59:43.000 What's the first word that comes out of your mouth?

00:59:44.000 It's like, you couldn't, there's not a chance in hell. 1.00

00:59:46.000 You couldn't do genuine slut. 1.00

00:59:47.000 You couldn't do any of that. 1.00

00:59:48.000 No.

00:59:49.000 You might be able to do land shark. 0.93

00:59:51.000 You know, but like even the fucking samurai thing that John Belushi used to do, you couldn't do that because it's cultural appropriation. 0.96

00:59:57.000 You can't pretend to be a Japanese guy. 1.00

01:00:00.000 They're broken.

01:00:01.000 But do you think Hollywood is, like with AI and all this, do you think that it stands a chance?

01:00:08.000 Yeah, it'll make awesome movies.

01:00:10.000 They're still gonna make movies, but they're gonna make movies entirely on a computer. 0.98

01:00:13.000 The people that are gonna be fucked are the actors and the writers. 1.00

01:00:16.000 They're fucked. 1.00

01:00:17.000 And then the animators. 1.00

01:00:18.000 They're fucked. 1.00

01:00:19.000 They're fucked. 1.00

01:00:19.000 Everybody's fucked. 1.00

01:00:20.000 All these special effects houses, you're fucked. 1.00

01:00:24.000 Everybody's fucked. 1.00

01:00:25.000 There's not a chance in hell that you survive. 1.00

01:00:28.000 They won't just use the technology to...

01:00:31.000 They won't need you.

01:00:33.000 Improve.

01:00:34.000 If a studio is making films, all they're going to need is algorithms.

01:00:39.000 They all kind of look like they're made by algorithms already.

01:00:42.000 What's going to happen is, they're going to do that, and then the number one movie in the world is going to be a movie that a kid made on his cell phone.

01:00:48.000 I know. 0.59

01:00:48.000 He's gonna make it with editing it on fucking iMovie on his phone or whatever it is. 0.59

01:00:53.000 And he's gonna make it off of his cell phone. 0.96

01:00:55.000 It's gonna be like the Blair Witch Project. 0.78

01:00:57.000 Or like Napoleon Dynamite.

01:00:58.000 It's so real.

01:00:59.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:01:00.000 Yeah. 0.98

01:01:01.000 But special effects and all that shit, that's out the window. 0.98

01:01:04.000 Yeah. 0.98

01:01:05.000 I don't know.

01:01:06.000 It seems like my friends who are still in Hollywood in LA, we've been talking and they're like, the wheels are coming off the bus out here.

01:01:14.000 They had a strike.

01:01:16.000 And they're like and we never recovered really and now the work is drying up because they are just using AI. Well it's not just that.

01:01:24.000 They're gonna be able to make real films real quick for real cheap and they're gonna do it and it's gonna cripple that business.

01:01:34.000 And if those films make any money, if they're any good, if people like them, it's gonna be so strange man.

01:01:41.000 So many jobs are gonna be useless.

01:01:44.000 We are literally giving birth to our successor.

01:01:48.000 And we're all like, oh, Meta's got an AI now.

01:01:51.000 Let me ask it some questions.

01:01:55.000 Do you use AI at all?

01:01:57.000 No.

01:01:57.000 Zero.

01:01:58.000 Zero.

01:01:58.000 I have a Samsung Galaxy S24 Ultra that has some AI features that I thought were interesting.

01:02:03.000 Yeah.

01:02:04.000 One of them was you can go to a website and it'll summarize the website for you.

01:02:10.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:02:11.000 That's kind of cool.

01:02:12.000 And there's some other things it does.

01:02:14.000 It summarizes notes for you.

01:02:15.000 Yeah.

01:02:15.000 Transcribes notes.

01:02:16.000 But other than that.

01:02:17.000 There's good things like for transcription, stuff like that.

01:02:20.000 I think that it is useful.

01:02:22.000 It can do it in no time at all.

01:02:25.000 I probably should ask it questions.

01:02:27.000 But it is...

01:02:28.000 About things.

01:02:29.000 If I have questions about a subject.

01:02:31.000 I asked it.

01:02:32.000 I was sending Tony a screenshot because I was asking it about the...

01:02:35.000 I asked it about the top comedy podcast and Kill Tony wasn't on there.

01:02:39.000 And I was like, it's shadow banning you.

01:02:42.000 AI's doing that?

01:02:43.000 I asked this AI search engine that I've used, you.com.

01:02:47.000 Well, for sure some of them are curated.

01:02:50.000 Some of the results are curated, just like Google results are curated.

01:02:53.000 It's very difficult to get certain stories now.

01:02:56.000 If you try to Google certain stories, things that have happened in the past, very hard to find.

01:03:00.000 And it seems like DuckDuckGo has been compromised, too.

01:03:03.000 Oh, no.

01:03:04.000 Not DuckDuckGo.

01:03:04.000 Yeah, I used to think that it was really Go, but it seems to mirror the results of Google now.

01:03:08.000 So where do you go?

01:03:09.000 Where it didn't use to for any weird stuff.

01:03:12.000 There's Brave.

01:03:13.000 Brave has a search engine that I think is with no algorithm.

01:03:19.000 I don't think it's curated.

01:03:21.000 I think there's a few other ones that you can go to that are like small-end search engines.

01:03:27.000 They're all tied into the same thing, right?

01:03:29.000 They're all tied into this great database in the world.

01:03:32.000 I just don't know I don't know what's going on behind the scenes that if you Google certain things, it will only give you positive things about a person.

01:03:44.000 And if you Google other people, it will only give you negative things.

01:03:47.000 Yeah.

01:03:48.000 Doesn't it seem, though, like tech is shifting a little more rightward?

01:03:55.000 No.

01:03:56.000 Only X. But, I mean, didn't freaking Zuckerberg the other day come out and be like, that was the most badass?

01:04:02.000 Or was that AI? No, it was real.

01:04:04.000 He said that.

01:04:05.000 But how much of a say do you really think Zuckerberg has over the entire business of Meta?

01:04:11.000 Right.

01:04:11.000 Yeah, he's the owner, the CEO, the big dog.

01:04:14.000 But he's also one human being.

01:04:17.000 Hunting people in Maui.

01:04:20.000 Yeah, he's doing jujitsu.

01:04:23.000 He's really into a lot of fun things.

01:04:25.000 He's having a good time, right?

01:04:27.000 I mean, he's not there every day.

01:04:29.000 For sure, people are getting shadow banned, and it's not like he's behind the scenes pulling the triggers.

01:04:34.000 It's a company, and it's a giant, huge company that is, like all these companies, heavily influenced by advertiser dollars.

01:04:42.000 Yeah, Dumpster Fire, we get that a lot from people.

01:04:45.000 We get emails constantly that they've been unsubscribed.

01:04:49.000 Like, I get one a day.

01:04:51.000 And we've reached out to YouTube and been like, hey, why does this happen?

01:04:54.000 They're like, well, if you can get a screen recording of that happening.

01:04:59.000 I'm like, so someone's supposed to record themselves being unsubscribed.

01:05:05.000 Like, this is impossible.

01:05:07.000 Then maybe they'll investigate it. 0.99

01:05:09.000 And dumpster fire is, you know, we're kind of like, like my friend the other day was like, the shit you say on that show, like, I'm like, we're fine flying under the radar. 0.99

01:05:20.000 Yeah, but you're not. 0.99

01:05:20.000 No one is, you know, even people that are kind of flying under the radar, they're not. 0.99

01:05:26.000 They know.

01:05:27.000 The algorithm's picking up things you say.

01:05:30.000 Oh, yeah.

01:05:31.000 They know what you're talking about.

01:05:32.000 And they don't like when people are questioning certain narratives.

01:05:36.000 No, no, no.

01:05:37.000 And it's funny.

01:05:38.000 Our slogan for dumpster fire is we make burgers out of your sacred cows. 1.00

01:05:41.000 And it is so funny.

01:05:43.000 Back to our tribalism thing.

01:05:45.000 Everyone has their thing.

01:05:46.000 Yeah.

01:05:47.000 Where you'll say something and they're like, ha ha, we love you.

01:05:49.000 And the minute you're like, and then blah, blah, blah.

01:05:52.000 And they're like, bah!

01:05:53.000 How dare you?

01:05:55.000 And that's all they hear.

01:05:57.000 That was your thing.

01:05:58.000 I'm sorry I stepped on your third rail.

01:06:00.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:06:01.000 You need rubber shoes, bitch. 1.00

01:06:05.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:06:06.000 The whole thing is stupid. 1.00

01:06:07.000 And it's very unfortunate there's no real competitors like a Twitter that's just a video thing like YouTube is. 1.00

01:06:14.000 He's trying, though.

01:06:16.000 Yeah, I mean, maybe he'll be able to do it.

01:06:18.000 It's possible.

01:06:18.000 If anybody's going to do it, Twitter's going to do it.

01:06:21.000 He's going to do it.

01:06:21.000 I mean, thank God we would not know the president wasn't dead.

01:06:24.000 No, I'm just kidding.

01:06:25.000 I'm just spreading conspiracy.

01:06:26.000 Do you think that that's a guy in a suit?

01:06:27.000 Let's watch the video.

01:06:28.000 Are you okay?

01:06:28.000 No, I got something in my eye.

01:06:30.000 You want to get it out?

01:06:31.000 No, no, no, no.

01:06:31.000 It's nothing.

01:06:32.000 You want to put some water in there?

01:06:33.000 No, I think it's actually just a cigar ash.

01:06:35.000 Do you have eye drops?

01:06:37.000 No, don't worry about it.

01:06:37.000 I'm fine.

01:06:38.000 I'm a mom now.

01:06:41.000 I know.

01:06:41.000 Thanks, Mom.

01:06:43.000 I want to show the video of Biden walking up the stairs of Air Force One.

01:06:48.000 Walked a little too sprily for my money.

01:06:50.000 But can we talk about just how objectively insane this is right now?

01:06:54.000 That we're arguing whether or not the president is really alive.

01:06:57.000 But also, like, everything that's happened in the past, what is it, 10, 11 days?

01:07:01.000 Yeah.

01:07:02.000 And this is, there's a large, we were all talking about this before we started recording, there's a large population of people who are acting like this is all just normal.

01:07:11.000 Like, oh, what's the big deal?

01:07:12.000 All the, like, people who are probably still wearing masks, they're all like, oh, what's the big deal?

01:07:17.000 I'm like, if this was Trump and he was installing, like, if just reverse parties and this was happening with Republicans, it would be literally Hitler going on.

01:07:28.000 The end of democracy. 1.00

01:07:30.000 It's fucking banana town. 1.00

01:07:32.000 Zoom in this fake Biden real quick. 1.00

01:07:35.000 Just kidding.

01:07:37.000 Go full screen.

01:07:41.000 Not him.

01:07:46.000 He has no idea where he is.

01:07:52.000 This is sad.

01:07:57.000 He's walking pretty good.

01:07:59.000 I don't know.

01:08:00.000 This is sad.

01:08:02.000 Or...

01:08:03.000 That's a 40-year-old guy in a suit.

01:08:07.000 But Trump nearly got assassinated.

01:08:10.000 Look at those hands.

01:08:11.000 Those are young hands.

01:08:12.000 He dropped out of the race with a notes apology.

01:08:16.000 I want to analyze this like the Patterson-Gimlin Bigfoot footage.

01:08:20.000 See his gait compared to other...

01:08:22.000 Yeah, I want to see his gait. 0.99

01:08:23.000 I want to study his gait with fucking AI software. 0.99

01:08:26.000 Hey, chat GPT. Tell me if this is the real Joe Biden based on how he walks. 0.99

01:08:30.000 I did see someone put...

01:08:32.000 It also could be fake.

01:08:33.000 They put the audio of the phone call into like 11 labs and it said it was like 98% chance it wasn't real.

01:08:39.000 Yes.

01:08:39.000 I don't know if that was real.

01:08:41.000 Let me send that to you too, Jamie. 0.80

01:08:44.000 When I texted you about Trump, I was like, it's fucked up that we even live in a time where all of our first reaction, which rightfully is, is this real?

01:08:55.000 When I heard about Trump, I was like, is this AI? Yeah, everything seems fake. 0.90

01:09:00.000 People were thinking that, I mean, didn't that one lady tweet that she thought that Trump only got shot in the head so he doesn't go to jail?

01:09:10.000 Wait, oh, so it was him?

01:09:12.000 She was trying to, I'll tell you right in a second after I sent that thing to Jamie.

01:09:17.000 This is, I mean, I get kind of turned on by all the chaos because I come from it. 0.96

01:09:23.000 Like, I do, I'm like, please stop, I'm going to start masturbating to Twitter. 0.98

01:09:27.000 It's too much. 0.99

01:09:28.000 It's just too hot.

01:09:31.000 It It's so crazy.

01:09:32.000 It's just like every day it's crazier.

01:09:34.000 Okay, who it is?

01:09:36.000 Gail Helt.

01:09:37.000 She said, so it says, this is like Aaron Rupert said, Nancy Mace apparently said this.

01:09:44.000 I guess it was on one of those news channels.

01:09:46.000 Donald Trump literally took a bullet for our country.

01:09:49.000 And this lady posts, no, he didn't.

01:09:51.000 He was hit with a bullet because he's desperate to stay out of prison.

01:09:55.000 Now, supposedly these are deleted tweets. 0.99

01:09:58.000 So this might be bullshit. 0.97

01:10:00.000 So we have to find out that because the Russians are always trying to keep us at each other's throats, ladies and gentlemen. 1.00

01:10:05.000 And then there's the 4chan trolls.

01:10:08.000 So that might not even be a real tweet.

01:10:10.000 Yeah.

01:10:10.000 So let's find out if that's a real tweet.

01:10:12.000 Because otherwise I'm going to make you cut that out so we don't get sued.

01:10:17.000 Who is Gail Haight, first of all? 0.95

01:10:19.000 Helt.

01:10:20.000 Gail Helt.

01:10:21.000 H-E-L-T. Why would you get sued?

01:10:23.000 By who?

01:10:23.000 People will sue you if you read a fake tweet.

01:10:28.000 With their name on it?

01:10:29.000 Twitter account.

01:10:29.000 Which Twitter account should I look up?

01:10:31.000 The Twitter account.

01:10:33.000 Hold on, sorry.

01:10:34.000 This is amazing.

01:10:35.000 I know.

01:10:36.000 Hilarious.

01:10:40.000 It's G-H-E-L-T. But it feels like the Trump thing's already out of the news cycle.

01:10:49.000 Oh, yeah.

01:10:50.000 What's the big deal? 0.81

01:10:51.000 You just got shot in the head.

01:10:54.000 No press conference? 0.62

01:10:55.000 Nothing.

01:10:56.000 Did she get rid of her account?

01:10:58.000 That's the lady. 1.00

01:10:59.000 Yeah.

01:11:02.000 So that's the claim.

01:11:05.000 CIA analyst.

01:11:07.000 Honeypot.

01:11:08.000 Don't click on it!

01:11:09.000 What?

01:11:09.000 His account does exist.

01:11:10.000 So she killed her account after this.

01:11:13.000 This is weird.

01:11:15.000 Yeah.

01:11:17.000 And do you know that Biden, when he announced that he was not going to seek re-election, it was National Ice Cream Day?

01:11:27.000 I was like, we live in a simulation. 1.00

01:11:29.000 Okay, context, morons. 1.00

01:11:31.000 The point was that, no, he didn't take a bullet for his country. 1.00

01:11:35.000 The point was that he's running to stay out of prison, and thus is why he took a bullet. 0.99

01:11:40.000 No one believes he set himself up, and you're a fool for trying to twist this into that. 0.99

01:11:46.000 Uh... 0.99

01:11:47.000 Gaslight?

01:11:50.000 You didn't say it very well if that's what you meant.

01:11:55.000 What?

01:11:55.000 Yeah, she must have deleted her account.

01:11:57.000 Yeah, you did not say it very well if that's what you meant.

01:12:00.000 If that is what you were trying to say, well, you did a bad job of expressing yourself. 0.99

01:12:05.000 You can't call people morons because you literally said that. 0.99

01:12:09.000 He was hit with a bullet because he's desperate to stay out of prison. 0.99

01:12:12.000 Like, that can be interpreted in a lot of ways.

01:12:16.000 This is end of days.

01:12:16.000 So here's the thing about the AI voice thing.

01:12:19.000 So play this.

01:12:22.000 I know yesterday's news is surprising, and it's hard for you to hear, but it was the right thing to do.

01:12:30.000 I know it's hard because you've poured your heart and soul into me.

01:12:34.000 Okay, now listen.

01:12:36.000 Let's just go on old Eleven Labs and see if that's really all they probably used for this.

01:12:45.000 So...

01:12:45.000 I love it.

01:12:49.000 Nerds cannot be stopped. 1.00

01:12:53.000 Very likely.

01:12:54.000 Probability 98%.

01:12:56.000 They didn't even really try.

01:12:58.000 But he's going to speak soon, allegedly. 0.99

01:13:04.000 That guy in the fucking makeup is going to speak. 0.99

01:13:08.000 That 40-year-old guy with them 40-year-old hands. 1.00

01:13:11.000 That guy had young man hands.

01:13:13.000 He didn't have dead man hands.

01:13:16.000 I don't know, but here's the thing.

01:13:18.000 If you have a letter like that, okay, and this is how he resigns, he resigns or says he's not going to run again, with a letter.

01:13:25.000 The letter does not have a presidential seal on it, and the letter has a digital signature on it, right?

01:13:30.000 That's what it was, right?

01:13:34.000 Okay, maybe.

01:13:35.000 But before that, before he got COVID, didn't he say that he wasn't going to quit?

01:13:39.000 He did, right?

01:13:40.000 Yeah. 0.86

01:13:41.000 So they killed him.

01:13:42.000 Well, there's been a lot of weird stuff.

01:13:43.000 We haven't seen him since then, right?

01:13:45.000 And then he gets COVID, and then all of a sudden he says he can't.

01:13:49.000 And they also said that they gave him 10 doses of Pax Lovid.

01:13:53.000 Is that true?

01:13:54.000 Google that. 1.00

01:13:55.000 Because I read that, and that might be some Russian troll shit, because they might be saying, like, they're waiting for doctors to go, that would kill him! 0.99

01:14:01.000 Why do you give him 10 doses? 1.00

01:14:03.000 That's fucking insane! 1.00

01:14:04.000 They're like, well, we couldn't kill Trump, so now we've got to kill Biden. 1.00

01:14:08.000 He might have been exposing a glitch where every few times that app says that anything was created by it. 0.89

01:14:15.000 Oh, well, here's one way to find out.

01:14:17.000 Why don't we take a segment of us talking right now, upload it, and see if it thinks that we're AI. Can we do that?

01:14:23.000 I can't do that.

01:14:24.000 How come?

01:14:25.000 Because we're recording it right now, and I'd have to stop recording it.

01:14:28.000 Can we stop recording for just five seconds and then do that?

01:14:30.000 No.

01:14:31.000 No?

01:14:32.000 Can I record something on your phone and then maybe upload it to that?

01:14:36.000 I'm just curious.

01:14:38.000 Imagine?

01:14:38.000 I could get an older podcast and do it.

01:14:40.000 Oh yeah, do that.

01:14:41.000 Yeah, put a little chunk up there. 0.99

01:14:44.000 Let's see what's up.

01:14:45.000 How funny would that be?

01:14:47.000 If it's like 98% fake.

01:14:48.000 People would be like, then here's the new conspiracy.

01:14:50.000 Joe Rogan is AI. The government created him.

01:14:53.000 That's the whole reason why that show became popular. 1.00

01:14:55.000 There is no fucking way they would allow that show to say the crazy shit they did. 1.00

01:15:00.000 It's all ops. 1.00

01:15:01.000 It's all undercover, deep ops.

01:15:04.000 Everything's an op.

01:15:05.000 Controlled opposition.

01:15:06.000 That was what they all said about me when I came on the scene.

01:15:09.000 When I started writing and talking, they were like, she's a deep state plant sent to undermine conservatism.

01:15:14.000 Are you?

01:15:15.000 No.

01:15:15.000 Here's the thing.

01:15:17.000 If you were on the outside looking in, you probably would think that that's the case. 0.97

01:15:21.000 But if you want to pay attention to the way this whole administration's going, pay attention to Karine St. Peter, whatever the fuck her name is, the White House press secretary, accidentally tweeting Trump's post from her account, wrong account. 0.95

01:15:36.000 Remember that? 0.96

01:15:36.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. 0.96

01:15:37.000 This is incompetence.

01:15:39.000 If you look at the crew of people that's responsible for the press in the White House, they're all like young kids.

01:15:45.000 They're all young kids, first job, and she's their boss. 0.99

01:15:48.000 And then you look at that guy that was the fucking Sam Brinton that was stealing women's clothes. 0.99

01:15:54.000 He was in charge of nuclear energy. 0.99

01:15:56.000 Everywhere you look, Pete Buttigieg, all these people, it's incompetence.

01:16:00.000 Oh, I know.

01:16:01.000 It's massive incompetence glued together.

01:16:03.000 I don't think there's a grand plan.

01:16:06.000 This is what my husband always says.

01:16:08.000 I think there's a bunch of really incompetent people scheming and clump and banging heads and not knowing what to do and arguing with each other.

01:16:16.000 And afraid to lose their jobs.

01:16:18.000 Chaos.

01:16:18.000 And a dude who's 40 years old in a Biden suit.

01:16:21.000 And that's... 0.99

01:16:23.000 And also the deep state conspiring behind all of it to make it look like it's just these incompetent dummies. 0.98

01:16:29.000 They think that everybody's somehow or another like some sort of a plant. 0.97

01:16:32.000 I wish I could tell you where you would understand me and believe me.

01:16:36.000 I think most of the things that you think are like deep state are not.

01:16:40.000 I think this whole thing is way more chaotic than we give it credit for.

01:16:44.000 It's not as easy as like they're manipulating us, they're controlling us. 0.98

01:16:48.000 Yeah, they're fucking trying, for sure. 0.92

01:16:50.000 But it's not working anymore. 0.98

01:16:52.000 And that's part of the problem.

01:16:53.000 Right.

01:16:54.000 Like, before in the past, no one had Internet search access to how much money Nancy Pelosi was making. 0.99

01:17:00.000 Yeah, you'd be like, all right.

01:17:01.000 They just did it.

01:17:02.000 They were doing it forever.

01:17:03.000 They just did it that way.

01:17:04.000 And no one knew, right?

01:17:06.000 Except the people that also did it.

01:17:07.000 Right.

01:17:07.000 Because they were doing it, too.

01:17:09.000 Which is why they never call each other out.

01:17:11.000 Right. 1.00

01:17:11.000 They're all a bunch of criminals. 1.00

01:17:12.000 So now that we all know that, like, this is all... 0.97

01:17:15.000 Everything's been exposed to the point where they want to keep justifying the way they're doing things.

01:17:19.000 They've got to be very clever about it.

01:17:21.000 So I can't wait to find out the results, whether or not I'm AI. You are AI. Whew.

01:17:26.000 Imagine, if the world is a simulation, I might be AI. I was talking to a family member about just the incompetence and secret service stuff and hiring these people and they're firemen,

01:17:41.000 basically.

01:17:42.000 And they were telling me that they had to hire an actual...

01:17:47.000 He's like, none of these are lies.

01:17:50.000 They had to hire an autistic kid.

01:17:51.000 And he's like, this kid hides in the bathroom And takes naps during the day.

01:17:58.000 But once you kind of hire these, you know, neurodivergent people or whatever, you can't really fire them.

01:18:04.000 So they had to like track it and like keep.

01:18:07.000 And he said another guy they hired who was like something wasn't right, got into a minor fender bender in one of the trucks and like froze up.

01:18:16.000 And he's like, this is a first responder who froze up when they got into and wouldn't get out of the truck.

01:18:22.000 And he's like, I'm not making any of this up. 1.00

01:18:25.000 He's like, how am I supposed to fucking work with this shit? 1.00

01:18:27.000 That's crazy. 1.00

01:18:28.000 And he was saying the same thing about the Secret Service and all that.

01:18:31.000 He's like, this is a woman who was buds with Jill, and she was from Pepsi before, and instead of putting some marine in charge...

01:18:41.000 Okay, look.

01:18:42.000 They ran the sample very unlikely.

01:18:44.000 So it was right.

01:18:46.000 Probability of 2.0%.

01:18:48.000 It's very unlikely this audio was generated with 11 labs where the audio is manipulated.

01:18:52.000 Try it a few times and see if it keeps doing it.

01:18:54.000 Try it a few times, but now we also need to do an AI generator.

01:18:57.000 But hold on a second.

01:18:58.000 That makes sense.

01:19:00.000 Like, that means it's accurate.

01:19:02.000 This guy said, this is the guy who made the original tweet.

01:19:07.000 Right.

01:19:09.000 This is the guy who posted the goofy little glitch that makes Eleven Labs say his voice was AI-generated once every few tests.

01:19:15.000 Okay, this is the guy who posted the goofy little glitch.

01:19:19.000 Okay, so this was a funny shower thought which yourselves and the entire internet placed a near infinite more about of thought.

01:19:30.000 What?

01:19:30.000 This person is drawn.

01:19:32.000 This person is out of their fucking mind. 1.00

01:19:33.000 Into than I did. 1.00

01:19:36.000 Please carry about your business and stop harassing even about being... 1.00

01:19:40.000 Did fucking AI write this? 1.00

01:19:42.000 Maybe. 1.00

01:19:44.000 Yours truly, the guy whose cringy jokes often go way too far and the internet scares me.

01:19:48.000 Please help. 0.99

01:19:49.000 I think he was just fucking around. 0.94

01:19:50.000 Maybe. 0.99

01:19:51.000 But the point is that we can't listen to anything he's saying now and take it seriously.

01:19:56.000 The other thing, though, sounded like AI to me.

01:20:00.000 It sounded like there's a weird...

01:20:02.000 If you could play it again.

01:20:03.000 Well, no.

01:20:04.000 There's a weird, fake expression.

01:20:07.000 There's a smell.

01:20:10.000 Like, when you hear it, there's a smell.

01:20:12.000 I know yesterday's news is surprising, and it's hard for you to hear, but it was the right thing to do.

01:20:20.000 I know it's hard because you poured your heart and soul into me.

01:20:26.000 It just seems, there's something, the heart and soul into me.

01:20:30.000 It's something into me.

01:20:31.000 It's like, it's a robot talking.

01:20:33.000 It's ex machina.

01:20:35.000 It's not a person.

01:20:36.000 Yeah, it's like triggering your uncanny valley.

01:20:39.000 100%. 1.00

01:20:39.000 It's triggering my bullshit meter. 1.00

01:20:41.000 Now, I 100% am only saying this because he's missing. 0.99

01:20:47.000 He's not missing.

01:20:48.000 If I had not seen, except for the guy in the suit, if there was a time where there was no question about whether Joe Biden was alive and I heard that, I would go, oh, that's probably Joe Biden.

01:21:00.000 Just for full disclosure.

01:21:03.000 Do you think that some accident will happen?

01:21:05.000 Or like, oh, a medical emergency before the speech?

01:21:08.000 Well, that's what Alex Jones was saying. 0.72

01:21:11.000 Alex Jones was saying they failed to kill Trump, so now they're going to kill Biden because they can't have him run against Trump because he can't beat Trump.

01:21:17.000 But if Trump got shot, Biden would win in a landslide.

01:21:20.000 I was playing something that I think it was you who sent me about.

01:21:23.000 It was Alex, I think.

01:21:25.000 And my husband's like, turn that off!

01:21:28.000 He's like, Bridget, I can send you a 17th tweet thread debunking the first two minutes of that from a guy in the army.

01:21:35.000 I'm like, okay.

01:21:36.000 Your husband needs to get red-pilled. 0.90

01:21:38.000 He's just a skeptic.

01:21:39.000 He doesn't attribute to malice what he can attribute to incompetence.

01:21:45.000 Well, that's smart, but also malice is real.

01:21:47.000 So you have to look at both, and you can't be biased in one side or another.

01:21:51.000 Well, I think that's why we make a good balance, because I'm like, no!

01:21:54.000 It's a conspiracy!

01:21:55.000 Well, I don't think everything's a conspiracy because I know that some conspiracies that I've personally been accused of being involved in aren't real.

01:22:03.000 So I'm like, okay, so people are just suspicious.

01:22:05.000 I think there's a lot of suspicion and also rightly so. 1.00

01:22:09.000 Right.

01:22:09.000 How can you not be?

01:22:10.000 Because there's a lot of conspiracies are 100% real.

01:22:12.000 By the way, I can probably think of three episodes that you and I have done where we talked about how Biden was too old and we got called conspiracy theorists for saying that.

01:22:22.000 Dude, I had a text message from a friend who was saying, don't you know that Biden has a stutter?

01:22:27.000 I go, when did he get this stutter?

01:22:29.000 Because if you go and listen to him when he was running for president in 1988, he spoke smooth.

01:22:36.000 Yeah.

01:22:36.000 Smooth as silk.

01:22:37.000 We could check this out.

01:22:38.000 This person says they recreated the phone call using AI. And apparently it sounds a lot like it.

01:22:46.000 And then go on to win the...

01:22:49.000 And I've been honored.

01:22:50.000 That's not him.

01:22:51.000 That's somebody else's voice.

01:22:53.000 Alright, so never mind.

01:22:55.000 That wasn't Joe Biden.

01:22:56.000 Okay.

01:22:58.000 Maybe they're trying to prove a point.

01:23:00.000 Either way, we know for sure that AI is real.

01:23:04.000 AI can make you say basically anything they want to say.

01:23:08.000 We've done it with me.

01:23:10.000 You know who does it all the time?

01:23:11.000 Duncan.

01:23:11.000 Duncan will have Tony Hinchcliffe apologizing for things that he never did and admitting that he's a rainy street assassin.

01:23:19.000 I love Duncan.

01:23:21.000 I love his stand-up, too.

01:23:24.000 It's just like...

01:23:25.000 I love his long...

01:23:27.000 Like, I want to be in his brain. 0.97

01:23:29.000 I want to crawl into his brain. 0.97

01:23:31.000 You can't get in there. 0.99

01:23:31.000 I want to crawl into his brain and look around. 0.99

01:23:34.000 You get a contact high just smelling his brain. 0.55

01:23:36.000 But he did a thing with Johnny Pemberton where Johnny Pemberton pretended to be like a CIA undercover agent or something like that.

01:23:44.000 They changed his voice.

01:23:45.000 They changed his appearance.

01:23:46.000 They changed everything.

01:23:47.000 Wow.

01:23:47.000 In video, in real time.

01:23:49.000 Oh, I'm sure.

01:23:49.000 So you know what Johnny looks like?

01:23:51.000 So it's Johnny Pemberton.

01:23:52.000 He looks like a 12-year-old kid.

01:23:54.000 And he looks like a completely different person. 1.00

01:23:56.000 He's saying absolutely ridiculous shit. 1.00

01:23:58.000 And it sounds like this other person's voice. 1.00

01:24:01.000 And this is all...

01:24:02.000 Like, you could be, you know, Morgan Freeman.

01:24:05.000 Yeah.

01:24:05.000 You could start talking and they could have AI... Take your voice, convert it to Morgan Freeman's voice, take your image, take every expression you make, opening your mouth, every smile you make, and convert it into Morgan Freeman doing the exact same thing.

01:24:19.000 This is why there's no pictures of my kid on the internet.

01:24:23.000 Yeah.

01:24:24.000 There was this creepy video going around and they took all these pictures of this nine-year-old and it was like in Norway somewhere and they grew her up, had her talking, had her, and because the parents had posted all this stuff and she was like asking for them to come read it.

01:24:38.000 My most judgy mom opinion, and I don't have many, is we know too much to put our kids online.

01:24:49.000 Before they're able to...

01:24:51.000 No, it's crazy.

01:24:53.000 It's not...

01:24:56.000 They can't understand what you're doing, first of all.

01:24:59.000 But with AI, you can't know how... 1.00

01:25:02.000 Have you heard about the shit they do in Japan? 1.00

01:25:04.000 They're having a huge problem with turning these images people are putting of their kids into child porn. 1.00

01:25:10.000 Of course. 1.00

01:25:11.000 It's like a huge fucking problem. 1.00

01:25:13.000 Of course. 0.99

01:25:13.000 They're doing that with everybody. 0.99

01:25:15.000 I guarantee you, every fucking human being that is out there on Facebook and Instagram, someone's turned you into a porno film. 0.99

01:25:22.000 Yeah, I don't know. 0.99

01:25:23.000 I'm just...

01:25:23.000 It's crazy.

01:25:25.000 It scares me.

01:25:26.000 It's crazy.

01:25:26.000 I mean, that was a big problem with celebrities, right?

01:25:28.000 They were taking celebrities and face swapping them and turning them into porn stars.

01:25:32.000 Yeah, and there's no...

01:25:33.000 I mean, there was like a whole thing in Beverly Hills about all these...

01:25:36.000 These teenagers were doing it to each other as like, you know, they were all just being mean teens and...

01:25:42.000 It's crazy.

01:25:43.000 I don't know how you even...

01:25:44.000 And there aren't laws against it, which there should be, but I don't even know how you litigate it.

01:25:49.000 Well, they would have to get ahead of it.

01:25:51.000 And they can't.

01:25:51.000 It's too late.

01:25:52.000 No, they can't.

01:25:53.000 All the technology's out there.

01:25:55.000 And then there's also not enough people that understand it that are in the government.

01:25:58.000 And it's like whack-a-mole.

01:26:00.000 You get rid of one and it pops up 10 other places.

01:26:03.000 Right.

01:26:04.000 And how are you going to get rid of the ones that are in other countries? 1.00

01:26:06.000 You're not going to.

01:26:06.000 No, it's not.

01:26:08.000 You just use a fucking VPN, log into that other country, download it. 0.99

01:26:13.000 No, it's bad. 1.00

01:26:14.000 It's wild.

01:26:15.000 No, it's wild.

01:26:16.000 And it's only going to get wilder.

01:26:17.000 Yeah.

01:26:18.000 This is like...

01:26:19.000 I mean, Elon talks about this all the time.

01:26:21.000 Like how it's just the dawn of this.

01:26:23.000 Yeah.

01:26:24.000 This is the dawning of the age of Aquarius.

01:26:28.000 Did you see this video yesterday with Jordan?

01:26:32.000 Which one?

01:26:32.000 Where he was talking about what happened to his kid and how...

01:26:35.000 You mean Elon?

01:26:36.000 Elon, yeah.

01:26:37.000 Yeah, I did see that.

01:26:38.000 It was emotional.

01:26:39.000 It's horrible.

01:26:41.000 Yeah, I think a lot of people have become kind of, for lack of a better word, red-pilled by that kind of stuff.

01:26:49.000 And they should be.

01:26:50.000 The new California thing.

01:26:54.000 Explain to people what it is.

01:26:56.000 It's so nuts.

01:26:58.000 You hear it and you go, there's no way they did this.

01:26:59.000 There's no way they took away power from the parents.

01:27:03.000 There's no way they don't inform the parents.

01:27:05.000 I mean, that had kind of been going on, but now they've just put it into law that you essentially don't have to, you know, the people who would fight against it would say, oh, they're outing these kids to their parents.

01:27:17.000 But basically, a kid can go in and call themselves Jack if they're Jill.

01:27:22.000 At home and the school doesn't have to tell the parents that they're identifying as a boy, that they're doing, that they're dressing, that they're being called by a completely different name.

01:27:34.000 There's no requirement. 0.93

01:27:36.000 It's just so crazy to me and I'm sure Scott Wiener's behind this because he's behind every creepy ass bill in that state.

01:27:44.000 It's crazy to me that you are telling adults to keep secrets About the kids from the parents, that's generally something that's a huge red flag. 0.89

01:27:56.000 It's a huge red flag.

01:27:57.000 And you also have activists who are teachers.

01:27:59.000 That's a fact.

01:28:00.000 Yeah.

01:28:00.000 That's a fact.

01:28:01.000 A lot of the teachers are teachers specifically because they want to be able to influence young kids.

01:28:06.000 That's a fact.

01:28:07.000 Some of them are really good teachers and they have this idea that I'm going to help these kids and influence these kids in a positive way. 0.99

01:28:13.000 And some of them are fucking crazy people that are locked into an ideology and they want to convert these kids into that ideology. 0.99

01:28:20.000 When you have five years old and six year old kids, you shouldn't have fucking pride flags in the school. 1.00

01:28:24.000 That's ridiculous. 0.99

01:28:25.000 If you have this big pride display in the school and everyone's wearing rainbows, you are incentivizing kids to think that going in one direction or the other is better. 0.94

01:28:34.000 You're pushing them.

01:28:36.000 You're influencing them in a weird way. 1.00

01:28:39.000 And you might be a fucking crazy person. 1.00

01:28:41.000 Well, it's also like Helen Joyce said. 1.00

01:28:43.000 She had this brilliant clip.

01:28:44.000 She was talking about how there's no way out.

01:28:49.000 If you're a parent who's supported this, like every time you hear about somebody who's advocating for this, legislating it, legislating kids being able to get puberty blockers or whatever, it's somebody who has a kid of their own.

01:29:02.000 And she was saying...

01:29:04.000 Such a brilliant clip.

01:29:05.000 She was basically saying they're doubling down because it's that or admit that they've done a horrific thing to their child.

01:29:13.000 Right.

01:29:14.000 Yeah, that's what it is.

01:29:15.000 It's the same thing with people that got COVID and got vaccine injured and didn't want to tell people.

01:29:21.000 Did that happen a lot?

01:29:22.000 A lot, yeah.

01:29:23.000 Oh, I know people that got vaccine injured.

01:29:25.000 Look, Chris Cuomo.

01:29:27.000 Chris Cuomo got vaccine injured and didn't talk about it until CNN fired him.

01:29:32.000 Guess what?

01:29:33.000 I'm one of you.

01:29:33.000 It's like Pfizer's not paying for my checks anymore.

01:29:36.000 Yeah, the whole thing is just, again, a normal pattern of human behavior and thinking.

01:29:42.000 And this whole queer, trans, 2A, B, I, T plus thing, it's all attached to an ideology. 0.75

01:29:51.000 And the crazy thing for a lot of gay people is they are looking at this trans thing.

01:29:58.000 A lot of gay people that I talk to, they think it's homophobic. 0.93

01:30:00.000 They think a lot of these guys who think that they're girls will eventually just be gay men. 0.93

01:30:06.000 Yeah.

01:30:06.000 And that a lot of them go through it during puberty.

01:30:09.000 And when you are telling them that they really are going to live their authentic self and you're saying things like this. 0.78

01:30:16.000 Pray the gay way. 1.00

01:30:17.000 It is a very similar thing.

01:30:19.000 It's the same thing.

01:30:20.000 That is the same thing, right?

01:30:20.000 It's conversion therapy.

01:30:22.000 Right.

01:30:22.000 I mean, I did a whole piece, How Pride Blast the Public, and I interviewed Douglas Murray, all these brilliant...

01:30:29.000 I wish I could have just posted every interview I did with all these individuals because they're all so brilliant, but these guys and women have all been sounding the alarm, and lesbians are really getting erased.

01:30:41.000 You go on a lesbian app and it's like... 1.00

01:30:44.000 I joked on Dumpster Fire in 2019 that we're on our way to suck my dick bigot, and now we've been there for years. 1.00

01:30:51.000 It's a lot of men who identify as being a woman who say they're a lesbian, which is crazy. 0.99

01:30:56.000 But my lesbian friends are like, they're not even identifying. 1.00

01:31:00.000 They're just straight-up men on the lesbian app saying, like, I'm a lesbian. 0.50

01:31:06.000 Yeah, they're not even trying to look like a woman. 0.95

01:31:08.000 And you go on a date with them, and they just have lipstick on.

01:31:10.000 Hi.

01:31:11.000 Like, what?

01:31:13.000 I like girls. 1.00

01:31:15.000 I'm a girl. 1.00

01:31:15.000 What are you trying to say, you fucking bigot? 1.00

01:31:18.000 I'll fuck you in your ass. 1.00

01:31:19.000 Like, wait. 1.00

01:31:20.000 What are you saying?

01:31:23.000 It's not good.

01:31:24.000 It's so nuts. 0.94

01:31:25.000 And it's also like some of these people who identify as women, they think that because they're a woman, it's okay to punch other women. 0.95

01:31:33.000 And I've seen a lot of that.

01:31:34.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:31:35.000 I've seen a lot of that.

01:31:36.000 Yeah, yeah. 0.56

01:31:38.000 Like trans women getting in fist fights with biological women. 1.00

01:31:41.000 Like, what is going on here? 0.97

01:31:44.000 This is so crazy.

01:31:48.000 I think it's lost a lot of support, though.

01:31:51.000 Don't you think?

01:31:52.000 Do you feel like it has or no?

01:31:54.000 Yeah.

01:31:54.000 It's lost a giant chunk, but there's still a lot of really confused people that don't know what's going on.

01:32:00.000 They read mainstream newspapers and rarely.

01:32:04.000 They work in a bubble.

01:32:06.000 Generally, it's like a liberal bubble.

01:32:08.000 They work in a bubble that's also influenced by DEI. It's also influenced by the culture of the workforce in general.

01:32:18.000 And then these people, they don't hear everything.

01:32:20.000 They don't get all the data.

01:32:22.000 They don't have time to research these things.

01:32:24.000 So it takes them a lot longer to catch on. 0.85

01:32:27.000 A lot of this is mentally ill people that are trying to infiltrate into women's spaces. 1.00

01:32:33.000 That's a lot of it. 0.86

01:32:34.000 So you have people that have legitimate gender dysphoria that really want to be identifying as a woman.

01:32:40.000 And then you have creeps. 0.96

01:32:41.000 And to not identify the creeps and to pretend the creeps don't exist, you're not fucking helping anybody. 0.97

01:32:46.000 By the way, you should be protecting these women in prisons. 0.98

01:32:50.000 It's like rape shelters and women's shelters. 1.00

01:32:54.000 You just have these guys who are like...

01:32:56.000 To think that someone who's a predator and has committed crimes wouldn't try and manipulate the system.

01:33:03.000 It's like, I don't understand that willful knife.

01:33:05.000 After we get off the air, I'll tell you my bit about it. 1.00

01:33:07.000 Because it's so stupid. 1.00

01:33:09.000 The whole thing is so nuts. 1.00

01:33:10.000 It's just so nuts that it's so pervasive that it's actually made its way into prisons.

01:33:14.000 What made its way into, remember the Supreme Court lady, when they asked her?

01:33:18.000 Ketanji Brown Jackson?

01:33:19.000 Uh-huh.

01:33:20.000 Oh yeah, and couldn't answer what a woman is? 1.00

01:33:22.000 Yeah.

01:33:22.000 Yeah, but all these people should be on record.

01:33:26.000 The problem that we're having is that people need to push anyone who's saying, oh, this is just gender-affirming care.

01:33:35.000 So what exactly is that?

01:33:37.000 I want you on record explaining what that is.

01:33:40.000 So you're okay with giving kids puberty blockers so that they may not be able to have children or orgasms or X amount of things.

01:33:52.000 I've talked to a lot of people in the past however many years that I've done my podcast and the ones that sat with me the most and the most upsetting are all the kid detransitioners I've had on the podcast. 1.00

01:34:05.000 Those interviews are so hard and upsetting and it is... 0.98

01:34:10.000 Fucking criminal that there's even more than like 10 and they're churning them out. 0.99

01:34:17.000 Yeah, and there's the number of gender affirmation care clinics that exist in this country. 0.99

01:34:23.000 But by the way, Europe is like pushing back against it and we're not.

01:34:27.000 And a lot of it is because Europe does have the, you know, like universal...

01:34:31.000 Socialized medicine.

01:34:31.000 Yeah.

01:34:32.000 So they actually have to follow science because otherwise they're all paying for it.

01:34:36.000 Exactly.

01:34:36.000 Yeah.

01:34:37.000 And here it's just like a...

01:34:38.000 We're captured.

01:34:38.000 ...money grab like to start.

01:34:40.000 Well, you, and not just that, but what you alluded to earlier, that you have to take all those people that had done this, now they're in trouble.

01:34:50.000 Yeah.

01:34:50.000 Like, now people can get sued, the lawsuits can pile up.

01:34:53.000 I hope they get sued!

01:34:54.000 Well, that's the only, literally, in this country that feeds off of money, it's the only way that's going to stop it.

01:34:59.000 Yeah.

01:34:59.000 Listen, you have to recognize, folks, that this is a country that did lobotomies.

01:35:04.000 Yeah.

01:35:05.000 Until, what, 1965 or something like that?

01:35:08.000 Something crazy like that?

01:35:10.000 I don't know.

01:35:11.000 It might have been like 68. I think it was 1968. Google, Jamie, when did they end lobotomies?

01:35:17.000 They did who knows how many thousands of lobotomies. 0.93

01:35:23.000 Well, that's like all the women who got put in mental wards for hysteria. 1.00

01:35:26.000 Mm-hmm.

01:35:27.000 67. 67. Yeah, that's not that long ago.

01:35:30.000 That's not that long ago.

01:35:31.000 No.

01:35:32.000 No.

01:35:33.000 So it had to end with the death of the person it was performed on.

01:35:37.000 That was it.

01:35:38.000 They're like, enough.

01:35:39.000 Don't scramble brains.

01:35:40.000 Like, listen, we bucked up one person.

01:35:42.000 We made a few really cool people.

01:35:46.000 Walter Jackson Freeman II. What portal of hell does that guy find himself in today?

01:35:54.000 When did he die?

01:35:56.000 He died in 72?

01:35:57.000 How did he die?

01:35:58.000 So it was his idea.

01:35:59.000 So he died shortly after it was made illegal. 0.99

01:36:02.000 He fucking missed it. 0.99

01:36:03.000 He missed prosecution. 1.00

01:36:05.000 The idea that he performed 3,500 lobotomies.

01:36:11.000 He scrambled the brains of 3,500 people and 490 of them died as a result of the treatment.

01:36:19.000 Do they still do electroshock therapy?

01:36:21.000 Yep.

01:36:22.000 490 people died and the rest of them just got turned into vegetables. 0.99

01:36:26.000 So 310 just got turned into fucking squash. 0.99

01:36:31.000 Oh my god, so crazy. 0.99

01:36:34.000 How many people were lobotomized in the 50s?

01:36:36.000 Almost 20,000!

01:36:39.000 Oh my god, performing in the United States and proportionally more in the United Kingdom.

01:36:43.000 A large number of patients were gay men. 0.98

01:36:45.000 Oh my god, they scrambled their brain to get the gay out of there. 1.00

01:36:50.000 That's worse than pray the gay away. 1.00

01:36:52.000 Yeah, scramble the gay away. 1.00

01:36:54.000 Jesus Christ. 1.00

01:36:55.000 Scalpel the gay away. 1.00

01:36:56.000 Jesus Christ. 1.00

01:36:58.000 Yikes! 1.00

01:36:58.000 Oh, man. 1.00

01:36:59.000 Oh, and you stayed awake during it?

01:37:00.000 Oh, my God.

01:37:01.000 No!

01:37:03.000 What was that movie, Pie?

01:37:05.000 Where he gives himself a lobotomy or whatever at the...

01:37:08.000 Oh, my God.

01:37:08.000 Spoiler alert.

01:37:10.000 Did you ever see that Pie?

01:37:12.000 No, I didn't.

01:37:12.000 That movie?

01:37:13.000 He gave himself a...

01:37:14.000 I feel like at the end of that movie, I don't want to spoil it.

01:37:17.000 I might have just spoiled it.

01:37:21.000 I'm thinking of some guy that invented something insane somewhere in the UK and eventually he was tried for being gay. 0.94

01:37:29.000 God, I wish I could remember what it was.

01:37:32.000 It's like on the tip, in the back of my brain, I'm like, that guy, remember that guy, remember that story?

01:37:36.000 Some guy that's like incredible...

01:37:39.000 Alan Turing?

01:37:40.000 That's it.

01:37:41.000 Alan Turing.

01:37:42.000 That's it.

01:37:43.000 That's the robot thing.

01:37:44.000 Yeah.

01:37:45.000 Has Lex passed that yet?

01:37:47.000 No, Lex is a robot.

01:37:48.000 Pull that up.

01:37:49.000 Pull that up like what happened to him.

01:37:51.000 Okay, so here it is.

01:37:52.000 There were a number of high-profile arrests and trials, including the act of scientist, mathematician, and wartime codebreaker Alan Turing, convicted in 1952 of gross indecency.

01:38:04.000 He accepted treatment with female hormones, chemical castration, as an alternative to prison.

01:38:10.000 Turing committed suicide in 54. What?

01:38:14.000 Oh my god.

01:38:15.000 How crazy.

01:38:17.000 Again, not that long ago.

01:38:19.000 Not that long ago.

01:38:21.000 Not that long ago.

01:38:21.000 And that sounds today insane.

01:38:23.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:38:23.000 And guess what, you fucks. 1.00

01:38:25.000 That's what it's gonna sound like 50 years from now when people start talking about what you did to kids. 0.99

01:38:30.000 Yeah, no.

01:38:31.000 And they're out growing up.

01:38:32.000 This is crazy.

01:38:32.000 Yep.

01:38:34.000 Homosexuality remained illegal until 1967 in England and Wales, and until 1980 in Scotland! 0.99

01:38:40.000 Holy shit, Scotland! 0.98

01:38:44.000 1866, marriage was defined as between a man and a woman, preventing future same-sex marriages. 0.99

01:38:49.000 So they put a law in the books in 1866, and Scotland, over a hundred years later...

01:38:54.000 What about here, though?

01:38:55.000 When did it become...

01:38:57.000 That's a good question.

01:38:59.000 Well, I remember in 2013...

01:39:01.000 In the United States...

01:39:04.000 2013, Democrats were saying that it should be between a man and a woman.

01:39:08.000 That's what marriage is. 0.94

01:39:09.000 Marriage, but it was illegal in the States, wasn't it?

01:39:12.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:39:12.000 But imagine that.

01:39:13.000 Imagine Democrats saying that marriage should be between a man and a woman.

01:39:18.000 2003?

01:39:19.000 Yeah, that's...

01:39:19.000 Whoa.

01:39:20.000 I guess.

01:39:21.000 Wow.

01:39:21.000 Okay, we were pretty late.

01:39:22.000 We were way behind Scotland.

01:39:23.000 Sorry, Scotland.

01:39:24.000 Sorry for giving you a hard time.

01:39:25.000 You guys were so far ahead of us.

01:39:27.000 I was feeling like we were pretty behind Scotland on this.

01:39:31.000 I didn't think we were that behind!

01:39:33.000 2003, I was on Fear Factor.

01:39:36.000 Okay, 2003, gay rights proponents had another bit of happy news. 0.91

01:39:40.000 The U.S. Supreme Court in Lawrence v.

01:39:42.000 Texas struck down the state's anti-sodomy law.

01:39:45.000 Oh, okay.

01:39:46.000 So it wasn't, like, illegal to be gay?

01:39:48.000 It was illegal to do gay stuff.

01:39:49.000 I mean, same thing.

01:39:51.000 No, it's not.

01:39:52.000 I mean, isn't it?

01:39:52.000 You have to do the Ben Shapiro method.

01:39:54.000 You can be gay. 1.00

01:39:55.000 Punch the butt off? 1.00

01:39:56.000 You just don't do it. 1.00

01:39:59.000 Oh, my God.

01:40:01.000 Yeah, but so it was never illegal to be gay in the United States?

01:40:05.000 No.

01:40:06.000 Of course it was.

01:40:07.000 It had to have been absolutely illegal. 0.95

01:40:09.000 But no, just joking aside, sodomy laws, that makes it being gay illegal.

01:40:13.000 Aren't there still some on the books?

01:40:15.000 There's still weird sodomy profanity laws that are on the books.

01:40:20.000 Probably some weird...

01:40:22.000 Nah, it wouldn't be Massachusetts.

01:40:23.000 No, they have weird stuff on the books.

01:40:25.000 Really?

01:40:25.000 I remember reading about this.

01:40:27.000 I don't know if they still have it, but the reason you couldn't have sororities in certain places is because...

01:40:32.000 To get lesbian? 1.00

01:40:33.000 No, it was considered a coven. 0.65

01:40:36.000 Like too many women living in a house. 1.00

01:40:38.000 A bunch of witches. 0.94

01:40:39.000 They're smart.

01:40:39.000 They probably want to track their menstrual cycles.

01:40:42.000 These fucking dirty witches. 1.00

01:40:43.000 So this podcast I was listening to, she was saying that, I've never known this, I've always wondered, but I guess she's some neuroscientist woman, and I can't remember her name right now. 1.00

01:40:54.000 She was saying that it's because men would have to impregnate as many people as they could because if they went out and hunted, sometimes they wouldn't even come back. 0.84

01:41:03.000 They'd go find another similar tribe and just stay with them. 0.97

01:41:07.000 Jesus.

01:41:07.000 And so they had to, in order to keep up the population, they had to make sure that they could impregnate as many women at the same time.

01:41:16.000 And that's why women's cycles sync up. 1.00

01:41:20.000 Hmm. 0.98

01:41:20.000 I always thought it was just like people being competitive like one woman was like if I'm gonna bleed you're all gonna fucking bleed. 0.98

01:41:28.000 It's all interesting theories because you know so many of the things that people did back in the day were based on this fact that human beings didn't live very long.

01:41:38.000 Right.

01:41:38.000 And that infant mortality was really high.

01:41:41.000 You know like they had a lot of fertility rituals that they do back then.

01:41:45.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:41:47.000 I think my name is the Irish goddess of fertility, which explains how I got pregnant in 43. You want a fun law for Texas? 0.95

01:41:57.000 Yes.

01:41:57.000 Prohibited?

01:41:58.000 Possession of more than six dildos is prohibited.

01:42:02.000 Yeah, you're greedy.

01:42:03.000 It's the obscene device law. 1.00

01:42:04.000 You don't even have six holes, you greedy fuck. 1.00

01:42:07.000 Obscene device laws declares it a crime to possess six or more obscene devices or identical or similar obscene articles. 1.00

01:42:14.000 So you can have like six buttfuck magazines. 0.93

01:42:17.000 But I think you can still get married as cousins in certain states, too. 0.98

01:42:20.000 Like 26 states.

01:42:22.000 Look at this.

01:42:23.000 These infernal Devices include dildos. 0.99

01:42:27.000 So in Texas, you can legally own more guns.

01:42:29.000 Wait, what site is this?

01:42:30.000 This is an article on Mental Floss, and it's like top 10 weird sex laws that are still in place.

01:42:35.000 Let me finish the sentence.

01:42:36.000 So in Texas, you can legally own more guns and display them in public than you can sex toys, as some dildo-wielding campaigners have pointed out. 0.97

01:42:43.000 I don't want to know what that dildo-wielding... 0.99

01:42:46.000 You can't get married in Nebraska if your partner is a sexually transmitted disease. 0.99

01:42:51.000 What's that from? 0.51

01:42:53.000 You get the herps, that's a wrap.

01:42:54.000 You can't cohabitate in North Carolina.

01:42:57.000 Hold on.

01:42:59.000 With a partner if the couple is unmarried.

01:43:02.000 What?

01:43:03.000 Yeah.

01:43:04.000 It's illegal to live with a partner if the couple's unmarried.

01:43:07.000 So you can't live in North Carolina with a boyfriend or a girlfriend?

01:43:11.000 For real? 0.93

01:43:12.000 You can't have sex with them in six states. 0.93

01:43:14.000 Six. 0.93

01:43:15.000 Which states?

01:43:17.000 Utah.

01:43:17.000 Idaho, Illinois, Massachusetts, Mississippi, and South Carolina.

01:43:23.000 Hilarious.

01:43:24.000 In South Carolina, a false promise of marriage can land you in jail.

01:43:28.000 This is how I hear this.

01:43:30.000 Still in fornication laws that basically decree all forms of non-marital sex illegal.

01:43:34.000 But these laws are rarely enforced. 0.99

01:43:36.000 I love to fucking get rid of them. 0.99

01:43:38.000 Why do you got laws on whether or not people can jerk each other off? 1.00

01:43:41.000 Don't flaunt your booby pillows in Kern County, California.

01:43:45.000 Ooh, what's up in Kern County?

01:43:46.000 That's indecent. 0.98

01:43:47.000 Oh, booby pillows.

01:43:49.000 Thousand feet of a highway.

01:43:51.000 What does that mean? 0.99

01:43:52.000 Flashing your titties on the side of the road. 0.99

01:43:54.000 Like, I think literal, like, tit pillow. 0.99

01:43:56.000 Like a boob pillow. 0.92

01:43:56.000 Like a pillow that looks like a boob. 0.92

01:43:59.000 Like boobs. 1.00

01:43:59.000 Boob pillows? 1.00

01:44:00.000 Or just boobs? 0.99

01:44:00.000 I guess they're a thing. 0.99

01:44:01.000 It might have been a thing at some point.

01:44:02.000 Public articles. 0.99

01:44:03.000 I think they're boobs. 0.99

01:44:03.000 Hold on. 0.99

01:44:04.000 Public sale of articles depicting female breasts. 0.99

01:44:07.000 No, it is a boob pillow. 0.99

01:44:08.000 Oh, boob pillows.

01:44:08.000 Sale of stuffed objects known as boobie pillows.

01:44:11.000 Stuffed objects known as boobie pillows.

01:44:13.000 I've seen booty pillows.

01:44:14.000 So those are illegal.

01:44:16.000 So the problem is passerbys.

01:44:20.000 Can't talk about polygamy in Mississippi. 0.99

01:44:22.000 You can't sell them by the side of the road.

01:44:25.000 That's what the law is. 0.99

01:44:26.000 What the fuck were boobie pillows for? 0.99

01:44:29.000 I've never heard of them until 13 seconds ago. 0.99

01:44:31.000 Is it just a...

01:44:32.000 I don't know. 1.00

01:44:33.000 I mean, I guess it's just stupid. 1.00

01:44:35.000 It's just, ooh, got some tits. 1.00

01:44:36.000 Like guys who have rubber nuts hanging from their fucking trail hitch? 1.00

01:44:39.000 It's also just north of LA, apparently. 0.99

01:44:41.000 Is it legal to have rubber nuts hanging from your trail hitch?

01:44:44.000 Is that legal in Texas?

01:44:46.000 Let's find out.

01:44:47.000 That don't even count as a dildo. 0.97

01:44:49.000 That's just your sack of room.

01:44:50.000 Are you allowed to have those big things in Texas on the side of your wheels that, like, come out?

01:44:54.000 Have you seen these?

01:44:55.000 Oh, I don't know if you're allowed to.

01:44:57.000 They're everywhere!

01:44:58.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:44:59.000 I found out about those.

01:45:01.000 Those are crazy.

01:45:02.000 Paul Wall has those on his Cadillac. 1.00

01:45:05.000 I saw a car with them, I'm like, what the fuck? 0.98

01:45:08.000 Yeah, that doesn't seem like it's aerodynamic. 0.99

01:45:10.000 It's not good for your neighbors either.

01:45:12.000 I saw them on a truck.

01:45:13.000 Well, you definitely could scratch someone next to you.

01:45:15.000 Yeah, or pop their tire.

01:45:17.000 100%. 1.00

01:45:17.000 Yeah, that seems like some Texas shit. 1.00

01:45:20.000 It's ridiculous. 1.00

01:45:21.000 I've been here now... 0.83

01:45:23.000 Have we talked since I've been here?

01:45:24.000 I've been here since almost a year, like a little over a year.

01:45:29.000 I don't think you've been on the podcast in the last year.

01:45:30.000 Oh.

01:45:31.000 It's been since you moved here.

01:45:32.000 Oh, yeah.

01:45:33.000 I think you were a California dwelling back then.

01:45:35.000 Planning your escape.

01:45:36.000 Oh, yeah.

01:45:37.000 I love it.

01:45:38.000 If I remember correctly.

01:45:38.000 I love it.

01:45:39.000 It's great out here.

01:45:40.000 Yeah, I love it.

01:45:41.000 It's better.

01:45:41.000 But I also love all the friends I have and the friends that are here and everybody's coming here and making friends out in the burbs.

01:45:51.000 People are moving out, though.

01:45:52.000 They said that in 2023, more people for the first time left Austin than moved here.

01:45:58.000 That's good.

01:45:59.000 The rents will go down and stuff.

01:46:00.000 They won't go down.

01:46:01.000 No, they're going down.

01:46:02.000 It's a doom spiral.

01:46:03.000 No, no, no.

01:46:04.000 They passed a housing thing and they're actually going down.

01:46:07.000 They passed a bill?

01:46:08.000 To open up for building more housing and the rents are going down in Austin.

01:46:12.000 Every time you hear about people getting...

01:46:14.000 A lot of my friends have gotten rent deductions in the past year.

01:46:18.000 Really?

01:46:19.000 And a lot of people are leaving. 0.99

01:46:21.000 I had two people in my little basic bitch suburb. 1.00

01:46:23.000 They were like in the Facebook community, which I love. 0.97

01:46:27.000 I love it.

01:46:28.000 It's like the drama.

01:46:29.000 I love just watching it. 0.91

01:46:31.000 They were like, we're getting the fuck out of here. 0.89

01:46:34.000 I'm going back to California. 0.98

01:46:36.000 And I was like, where are you going?

01:46:37.000 They're like, it's too hot.

01:46:38.000 And they're like, Sacramento.

01:46:40.000 I'm like, Sacramento?

01:46:42.000 I thought it'd be like the beach or something.

01:46:44.000 But how different is Sacramento from California?

01:46:47.000 It's pretty hot, but it's a dry heat.

01:46:49.000 It's a different kind of heat.

01:46:50.000 No, it is.

01:46:50.000 And people, I don't know, a lot of Californians came here and are leaving.

01:46:54.000 Just because the heat?

01:46:56.000 Yeah.

01:46:56.000 Hilarious.

01:46:57.000 I know. 0.99

01:46:58.000 Pussies. 1.00

01:46:58.000 I know. 1.00

01:46:59.000 It's nothing.

01:47:00.000 It's really not that bad.

01:47:01.000 My husband loves it.

01:47:02.000 We're out there.

01:47:03.000 We became really good friends with the side surfs.

01:47:07.000 The people that make the cakes.

01:47:08.000 Yeah, the cake people.

01:47:09.000 And they're like our good homies and we celebrate.

01:47:14.000 We like our living such a...

01:47:17.000 It's such a weirdly American life.

01:47:20.000 We go to the...

01:47:21.000 We go have barbecues and our kids play.

01:47:28.000 I'm not looking over my shoulder for crazy people every second.

01:47:32.000 There's a reason why people move to the suburbs.

01:47:34.000 No, the suburbs are great.

01:47:35.000 When you have kids...

01:47:36.000 Especially if you want quiet.

01:47:38.000 Oh, they're so quiet out there.

01:47:40.000 That's what you want.

01:47:42.000 You're better off with a little bit of quiet.

01:47:44.000 And you can see the stars.

01:47:45.000 My daughter is just obsessed with space. 0.98

01:47:49.000 She's like, is that sad?

01:47:50.000 She knows all the planets.

01:47:51.000 She's just like...

01:47:53.000 She's thriving, which is all I can ask for as a parent.

01:47:57.000 Eventually, I want to live about an hour outside of Austin.

01:47:59.000 Yeah, me too.

01:47:59.000 But I can't.

01:48:00.000 One hour out and then drive in for shows and that's it.

01:48:03.000 Yeah, I can't.

01:48:04.000 I can't yet.

01:48:04.000 I mean, this was...

01:48:05.000 We got...

01:48:06.000 Because my husband was like, let's go further.

01:48:08.000 And I was like, that will be prohibitive to everything I want to do.

01:48:12.000 And so we had to kind of split the difference.

01:48:14.000 He would be further out.

01:48:15.000 There's plenty of good spots to live out here, though.

01:48:17.000 It's good.

01:48:18.000 You know, you can live a half hour outside and still be cool.

01:48:21.000 Like, where Red Band lives, it's real quiet.

01:48:24.000 I'm out by them.

01:48:25.000 Yeah, it's great.

01:48:26.000 It's beautiful out there, too.

01:48:27.000 And there's lots of great restaurants.

01:48:30.000 It's a nice place to live.

01:48:31.000 It's also, like, a really amazing place to do comedy now.

01:48:34.000 Oh, the scene is so...

01:48:36.000 It's the first time in our lifetime where a scene has emerged.

01:48:40.000 I wonder why.

01:48:42.000 So weird.

01:48:43.000 Crazy.

01:48:43.000 Who's behind that?

01:48:44.000 No, it is actually doing it and being around all the young, hungry...

01:48:51.000 I've fallen in love with it in a way that I did when I first started it.

01:48:55.000 It's just seeing how...

01:48:57.000 And it's also just so diverse, actually ideologically diverse.

01:49:02.000 Austin is a weird place.

01:49:03.000 You just don't, with all of the, like, your audiences, they're all tourists, and then the local audiences, you never really know.

01:49:10.000 It's not like when I was in L.A., I kind of knew what I was dealing with, or if you were outside of, you know, in Valencia, you knew also what you were dealing with.

01:49:19.000 Here, you're like, it's a smatter.

01:49:21.000 It's truly like a purple kind of town.

01:49:24.000 It's an interesting place.

01:49:26.000 Yeah, it's exciting.

01:49:28.000 It's just way better than California where we were living.

01:49:30.000 We're living also in a place that was captured by the entertainment industry and that you realize like that has a toxic radioactive glow that affects everything it touches.

01:49:40.000 It does.

01:49:41.000 Whether you think you're in the music business or you think you're in the entertainment business.

01:49:45.000 I'm not a performer.

01:49:47.000 I'm not trying to get famous.

01:49:48.000 Everyone's affected by what you're trying to accomplish.

01:49:51.000 All the people on the outside that work in other supportive industries, like that place is defined by the main goal of people that move there is to somehow or another make it.

01:50:01.000 Right, right.

01:50:03.000 Here it feels very art devoted.

01:50:05.000 You know, it has that Austin kind of like keep it weird and the people seem very...

01:50:10.000 That's the other thing I've noticed.

01:50:12.000 Everyone's very supportive.

01:50:14.000 It's not so like cutthroat and it felt, I don't know, it doesn't feel...

01:50:18.000 Well, comedy's like that now.

01:50:20.000 You know, comedy's like, it's not what it used to be.

01:50:22.000 It used to be very cutthroat.

01:50:23.000 But we realized somewhere along the line that we became, we're assets.

01:50:27.000 We're not like competitors.

01:50:28.000 And the competitors are good.

01:50:30.000 The people that are rising up, they give you inspiration to do better.

01:50:33.000 It's all good for you.

01:50:34.000 But there's room.

01:50:35.000 That's the thing that feels like you go to all these different shows.

01:50:38.000 You know Homeless Pimp?

01:50:39.000 He's doing a whole documentary on the scene.

01:50:42.000 It's really cool.

01:50:43.000 He's going out to open mics with young people who moved here, people who have been in 20 years who are moving here.

01:50:50.000 It's really cool.

01:50:51.000 Yeah.

01:50:52.000 Well, a lot of people that weren't getting the attention that they deserve somewhere else came here and now they're thriving.

01:50:58.000 Like Brian Holtzman.

01:50:59.000 Perfect example.

01:51:00.000 Brian Holtzman was just not getting the love he deserved and now he's got sold out shows.

01:51:05.000 Yeah.

01:51:05.000 And people come to see him because he's crazy.

01:51:07.000 They want to see. 0.84

01:51:09.000 And there's a lot of it.

01:51:10.000 Tyler Fisher is another one.

01:51:11.000 These guys weren't getting any attention where they were and they're really good.

01:51:16.000 You know, and there's more of those.

01:51:18.000 There's a lot more out there.

01:51:19.000 Metzger.

01:51:19.000 Metzger's another one.

01:51:20.000 Metzger.

01:51:21.000 Yeah.

01:51:21.000 That's why I'm like, we need Landau here.

01:51:23.000 Metzger moved here.

01:51:24.000 Oh, yes?

01:51:25.000 Yeah, he's here now.

01:51:26.000 No, he told me when I saw him, we went out to dinner when they were in town, and he said that they were thinking about it.

01:51:31.000 He's here now.

01:51:32.000 Oh, nice.

01:51:33.000 Yeah, I'm so happy.

01:51:34.000 Kim's here now, too.

01:51:35.000 Nice.

01:51:35.000 Yeah.

01:51:36.000 She just did a show, Kill Tony, last night. 1.00

01:51:38.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:51:39.000 We announced it.

01:51:39.000 She's the newest Austin resident.

01:51:41.000 Yeah.

01:51:42.000 Kim has a real chance.

01:51:43.000 She has a real chance.

01:51:45.000 Kim went up in front of me and she's from Orlando and I was doing a gig in Orlando and she's going to be there visiting her family.

01:51:51.000 She asked to do a set.

01:51:52.000 I'm like, yeah, for sure.

01:51:54.000 I sat and watched. 1.00

01:51:55.000 She fucking murdered. 1.00

01:51:57.000 I mean murdered. 1.00

01:51:58.000 I would have thought she was going to be way further ahead in her career.

01:52:02.000 I think it was like eight years ago, like eight years later.

01:52:05.000 But sometimes people, they're not quite focused the right way.

01:52:10.000 Nothing kind of catches.

01:52:11.000 And she moved to New York for a while.

01:52:13.000 But now she's out here.

01:52:14.000 Yeah.

01:52:14.000 She's got a real chance.

01:52:16.000 Yeah.

01:52:16.000 I love her.

01:52:17.000 We were just in the green room together.

01:52:18.000 She's very funny.

01:52:19.000 Dying laughing.

01:52:20.000 Very funny.

01:52:21.000 Yep.

01:52:22.000 I'm excited.

01:52:23.000 It's just like it feels...

01:52:24.000 When I first moved to L.A. and was in the scene and it was...

01:52:27.000 I had Troy Conrad on my podcast and we were talking about when we were like when...

01:52:34.000 It was like Tuesday nights and Roast Battle was starting and Kill Tony was starting and you were back and it was like this electric time at the Comedy Store and he was saying, you know, you were aware like this is special.

01:52:46.000 You're capturing something special.

01:52:48.000 And I feel that way about now, too.

01:52:52.000 There's just something special, you know, happening in Austin with comedy and scene.

01:52:57.000 It feels...

01:52:59.000 That was the thing about LA. I'm like, I feel like I'm driving around a city on hospice.

01:53:03.000 It just feels like a city that's not doing well.

01:53:07.000 And here, it's vibrant, and there's growth, and there's all kinds of different scenes, and there's tech, and there's so much live music.

01:53:17.000 It feels very vibrant and alive.

01:53:20.000 Well, a lot of it is because people were just fed up with California and they moved out here and they all came together.

01:53:27.000 And it's all these similarly minded people that wanted to be free to do the fun thing and then really also extra appreciated it now that it was taken away from them for a while.

01:53:38.000 And then now they have the best place to do it ever.

01:53:41.000 Yeah, and it feels very...

01:53:42.000 It's probably more libertarian than anything else.

01:53:45.000 Yeah, it's more libertarian.

01:53:47.000 There's very few conservatives in comedy.

01:53:49.000 And even the liberals, they're not...

01:53:51.000 If you want to be good, you can't be full leftist.

01:53:55.000 You can't do it.

01:53:56.000 You're handcuffing yourself.

01:53:57.000 It's like running with weights on.

01:53:58.000 What are you doing?

01:53:59.000 What are you trying to do?

01:54:02.000 You can talk about stuff that you believe in on podcasts, but you're doing a specific art form.

01:54:08.000 Stand-up comedy is a very specific art form.

01:54:10.000 And the goal is to make people laugh.

01:54:12.000 They're there for comedy.

01:54:14.000 It's not stand-up proselytizing.

01:54:18.000 It's not stand-up virtue-clapter.

01:54:21.000 I did a joke about Andrew Tate once and I got clapped her and I was like, I'm never doing that joke again.

01:54:26.000 That joke's done.

01:54:27.000 Yeah, it's funny.

01:54:29.000 I don't ever want clapped her.

01:54:31.000 Oh God, some people love it.

01:54:32.000 They just lean towards it and their punchlines are spaced out for clapped her.

01:54:38.000 Yeah, but that's like you're evangelizing.

01:54:41.000 Yeah, they're just not good.

01:54:42.000 That's all it is.

01:54:43.000 They're just not good at comedy.

01:54:44.000 I don't want to evangelize.

01:54:45.000 But they're only evangelizing because they're not good at comedy, right?

01:54:49.000 They're not evangelizing because they have the really unique perspective that people listen to, like Bill Hicks or something.

01:54:54.000 You go, wow.

01:54:55.000 Oh my God, I never thought about it that way.

01:54:57.000 No, it's clunky, clunky. 1.00

01:54:59.000 Dog shit idea from a lazy person that's not good at comedy. 1.00

01:55:03.000 And the reason why you suck at this whole virtue signaling thing is the same reason why you suck at comedy. 1.00

01:55:09.000 Like you don't have unique thoughts. 0.99

01:55:10.000 You haven't examined your mind enough.

01:55:12.000 You haven't really tried to figure out what's actually funny versus what you want the audience to think of you, which is a lot of what people are doing.

01:55:20.000 Yeah, my good faith interpretation, I guess, would be that they are believers.

01:55:25.000 Like, they're actually believers in their ideology or whatever, and they don't really realize they're proselytizing.

01:55:33.000 They think that they're making jokes about...

01:55:38.000 Sort of.

01:55:39.000 Informative...

01:55:40.000 Right, but you have to always run that through this filter.

01:55:44.000 And the filter is, if you're not good at comedy, and you don't have a career in comedy, and you're struggling in comedy, trying to get better at comedy, you are constantly trying to get positive reactions from the audience.

01:55:55.000 And if you can't get positive reactions through humor, you will get it through saying something that you think everybody believes in.

01:56:01.000 Right, right, I see.

01:56:02.000 So it's a trick.

01:56:03.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 0.96

01:56:03.000 It's just a shitty trick. 0.96

01:56:04.000 It's like a shortcut. 0.99

01:56:05.000 It's a shitty trick that works. 0.94

01:56:06.000 Yeah, yeah. 1.00

01:56:07.000 It's like wearing lipstick and shit in the women's room. 1.00

01:56:13.000 It's a shitty trick that works. 1.00

01:56:15.000 It doesn't mean that everybody doesn't know what the fuck is going on, you know? 0.98

01:56:20.000 So there's also kind of a just goofy alt scene that I love, and there's Ryer Cameraman. 0.97

01:56:28.000 I think she works at Mothership, but I've seen her at Creek in the Cave.

01:56:31.000 She has a Thursday night, and she does this bit. 0.98

01:56:34.000 I am obsessed with it about how she's like a deer.

01:56:38.000 Don't give away the bit.

01:56:38.000 I'm not going to give it away.

01:56:40.000 No one could do this bit.

01:56:42.000 It's only her, but she's so original, so adorable.

01:56:48.000 We must protect her at all costs.

01:56:52.000 Every time she gets up, and the audience never knows what...

01:56:56.000 They just don't know what to do all the time with her.

01:57:01.000 I'll be in the back just dying laughing and the audience is like, what is happening right now?

01:57:06.000 But she is so special.

01:57:09.000 She's so special.

01:57:10.000 That's awesome.

01:57:11.000 Yeah, there's a lot of different kind of comedy.

01:57:13.000 That's what I love.

01:57:15.000 It's a real meritocracy.

01:57:17.000 And one of the things that Adam, when Adam came over from the Comedy Store, he was dealing with a lot of pressure.

01:57:23.000 People were saying, why don't you have X amount of blank on the lineup?

01:57:26.000 X amount of women, X amount of gay people, X amount of trans.

01:57:29.000 People were giving him a hard time about everything.

01:57:32.000 And he was worried that he was going to get in trouble.

01:57:34.000 People were going to attack him and write articles about him.

01:57:37.000 And, you know, when he came here, specifically, I said, dude, everybody's welcome, but they have to be funny.

01:57:43.000 It's really that simple.

01:57:44.000 It's a complete meritocracy.

01:57:46.000 We're not going to say, let's get more women. 1.00

01:57:48.000 No, we're going to give all the women that want a chance to go on open mic nights. 1.00

01:57:52.000 Everybody has a chance.

01:57:54.000 You go up, if you get better, you get asked to do showcase shows.

01:57:58.000 There's a real, genuine system.

01:58:00.000 And having a genuine talent coordinator like Adam, who really watches.

01:58:05.000 He was there last night watching sets.

01:58:09.000 He watches people progress.

01:58:10.000 He watches the door people progress.

01:58:12.000 He watches all the new people come in from out of town.

01:58:14.000 He gives you great feedback when you get off.

01:58:16.000 He'll be like, I love that premise.

01:58:18.000 It's so helpful. 1.00

01:58:19.000 This is someone who watches this shit all day long. 1.00

01:58:22.000 Someone who's best friends at Norm MacDonald. 1.00

01:58:23.000 He really understands comedy.

01:58:25.000 And also, he's hilarious when I sit back there with him.

01:58:28.000 He'll make these comments that are funnier than anything that people are saying on stage.

01:58:33.000 Very funny.

01:58:34.000 He can hang.

01:58:34.000 But the point is, he really cares about his job.

01:58:37.000 And his job is free of all the mandates.

01:58:41.000 All he has to do is find funny people.

01:58:43.000 And look at what happens when you do that.

01:58:46.000 The lineup is so diverse.

01:58:47.000 If you look at all the different people on showcase nights, you're going to see every type of...

01:58:53.000 Gay, straight, black, white, Asian, tall, short, fat, skinny, everything. 0.98

01:58:59.000 Whatever the fuck from different parts of the world, all you have to do is be good at this thing we're all trying to do. 0.99

01:59:04.000 We don't care. 0.99

01:59:05.000 You're one of the family, no matter what you are, as long as you can do this thing we're doing.

01:59:10.000 And if you can't do this thing we're doing, either figure it out, or I don't know what to tell you.

01:59:15.000 And there's so much opportunity.

01:59:16.000 There are so many shows now.

01:59:18.000 It is crazy.

01:59:20.000 It's awesome.

01:59:21.000 Yeah, it's amazing.

01:59:22.000 There's Black Rabbit and that room is amazing.

01:59:25.000 There's five rooms on one street.

01:59:28.000 It's nuts.

01:59:30.000 It's beautiful.

01:59:30.000 And people can walk and do set to set.

01:59:32.000 And guys are doing four or five sets a night.

01:59:34.000 Yeah, it's like New York.

01:59:35.000 It is.

01:59:36.000 It is.

01:59:36.000 It's a unique thing, and it's only just begun.

01:59:39.000 I mean, it's only existed for a couple years.

01:59:41.000 You have to realize there was a small scene here.

01:59:43.000 There was a few good comics that were here, and they just didn't have the same push.

01:59:49.000 And they also didn't have the same group of killers.

01:59:51.000 They didn't have Shane Gillis move into town.

01:59:53.000 Is he here now?

01:59:53.000 Yeah, he lives here too.

01:59:55.000 Tim Dillon's got a place here.

01:59:57.000 It's like Tony's here.

01:59:59.000 Brian Simpson's here.

02:00:00.000 Ron White is here.

02:00:01.000 Yeah.

02:00:02.000 It's like there's so...

02:00:03.000 Tom Segura's here.

02:00:04.000 Christina.

02:00:04.000 Christina P's here.

02:00:05.000 There's so many fucking people. 0.99

02:00:07.000 I'm trying to talk Burton to move in here. 1.00

02:00:08.000 We're trying to lure Whitney to come here.

02:00:10.000 Yeah.

02:00:11.000 Whitney's a tough cookie to crack.

02:00:13.000 She did do a joke the other day on Instagram, though, about how she's like, this is why I'm leaving.

02:00:18.000 And it was like a purple Tesla.

02:00:20.000 Yeah, I saw that.

02:00:20.000 I was like, come!

02:00:22.000 Other than how straight men left.

02:00:23.000 Yeah.

02:00:24.000 She'll come eventually.

02:00:26.000 We've got more and more that are coming, and there's plenty room for everybody.

02:00:30.000 There's a lot of sets.

02:00:31.000 We do two shows a night in each room.

02:00:33.000 It's a lot of fun.

02:00:34.000 It's so much fun.

02:00:35.000 And the staff at that place is amazing.

02:00:40.000 I'm obsessed with Carrie.

02:00:41.000 She is a woman so close to my heart, I would go to war for her.

02:00:48.000 All the whole staff is so, like, they seem so, they're, like, happy to be there.

02:00:53.000 They're so lovely.

02:00:54.000 They're so cool.

02:00:54.000 I don't know.

02:00:55.000 It's like a nice, it's a good vibe.

02:00:58.000 It's not...

02:00:58.000 Yeah, we stole the heart of the Comedy Store.

02:01:01.000 You did.

02:01:02.000 We stole all the best people.

02:01:04.000 We didn't steal them, though.

02:01:05.000 They were all unemployed.

02:01:06.000 It was really perfect timing.

02:01:07.000 It wasn't like we poached them from the comedy store when the comedy store needed them.

02:01:10.000 No, they just needed a job.

02:01:11.000 They needed a job, and the comedy store wasn't going to be open for another year and a half.

02:01:15.000 Yeah.

02:01:15.000 Those people all came over here when there was nothing going on, and they were all, now they're employed.

02:01:20.000 Yeah.

02:01:20.000 And the way we did it, it was almost like the universe wanted it to happen.

02:01:25.000 The universe wanted all these little things to fall into place, to motivate people to get the fuck out of there.

02:01:29.000 All these things that fall into place where all of a sudden you're in this town, and There's buildings that are available.

02:01:35.000 There's like all these buildings available.

02:01:37.000 I know, but I remember so vividly doing your podcast in 2020. I think it was May of 2020 because it was like in the height of another crazy cycle like right now.

02:01:50.000 And you were like, I have a vision.

02:01:53.000 You had a vision as much as like, oh, it all kind of lined up.

02:01:57.000 And like you said on that podcast, I have a vision.

02:02:00.000 You just knew.

02:02:02.000 Yeah, I shouldn't have visions like that.

02:02:05.000 I shouldn't even believe in that.

02:02:07.000 Not like a vision like, I saw God.

02:02:10.000 No, no, no, no.

02:02:11.000 I mean, I'm saying like, even like, yeah, I had an idea.

02:02:15.000 Yeah.

02:02:16.000 I had an idea.

02:02:17.000 Yeah.

02:02:18.000 I mean, is that...

02:02:20.000 But I probably should have just done it and not told everybody.

02:02:23.000 Tell everybody I had a vision.

02:02:24.000 I wonder how much of that, because people believe in that, right?

02:02:28.000 They believe in vision boards and manifesting things.

02:02:31.000 This was this podcast I was listening to.

02:02:33.000 She's all about this, like it's the mirror neurons and you put it into the world.

02:02:39.000 But also I think you have to get people excited about an idea.

02:02:43.000 So whether it's an idea or a vision or whatever you want to call it, It helps to have people kind of excited, but I think you said that and then just went and did it.

02:02:53.000 I don't think you were on every podcast talking about your vision.

02:02:56.000 No, but here's the other thing I'm saying.

02:02:57.000 The number one thing that I've been most successful at, I had zero vision for.

02:03:01.000 That's this.

02:03:02.000 Yeah.

02:03:03.000 Zero vision.

02:03:04.000 When people are like, did you anticipate it was ever going to be the way it is?

02:03:06.000 Like, no.

02:03:07.000 No.

02:03:08.000 Never thought about it.

02:03:09.000 Never dreamed.

02:03:09.000 Never tried.

02:03:11.000 Wasn't.

02:03:11.000 Just kept doing it.

02:03:12.000 That's it.

02:03:13.000 But some of it, too, is just, like, consistency.

02:03:15.000 And right place, right time.

02:03:18.000 There's a lot of those things.

02:03:19.000 That's why, like, I should believe in fate.

02:03:21.000 I really should.

02:03:22.000 And you don't.

02:03:23.000 I don't.

02:03:23.000 What do you believe in?

02:03:24.000 I don't know.

02:03:25.000 I'm not sure I'm not sure if it's there's like I don't know what it is I don't I don't think it's as simple as fate because I don't think it's truly determined I think there's possibilities and these possibilities they open up and your energy and your thoughts Sort of synchronize with these possibilities,

02:03:48.000 and that's what excites you, and it expands.

02:03:52.000 And then you follow up on your instincts, and what's the correct way to approach this, and then you put more energy and more intensity into it, and then it all accelerates.

02:04:05.000 And other people sort of join in, and you collect like-minded people that also have their thoughts and their energy, and they push towards this thing.

02:04:14.000 And when you're doing it right, good things happen.

02:04:16.000 And that's what I think it is.

02:04:18.000 And so I should think it's fate.

02:04:20.000 But I also think it's a – manipulation is not the right word.

02:04:24.000 It's a synchronization with your – whoever you really are.

02:04:30.000 Like whatever your real thoughts are.

02:04:32.000 Whatever your real intention is, what are you trying to do?

02:04:36.000 I get that.

02:04:37.000 It's like this synchronization with all of it.

02:04:40.000 As much as it is like a vision of like, we're going to have the best comedy club in the world.

02:04:45.000 We didn't really think that.

02:04:46.000 No.

02:04:47.000 We thought we were going to just open up a club and let's hope it works.

02:04:51.000 Yeah.

02:04:51.000 My goal was like, let's not go broke.

02:04:54.000 Right.

02:04:54.000 I don't want to lose any money.

02:04:55.000 That's all my goal was, right?

02:04:57.000 I believe it!

02:04:57.000 No, it's really stated.

02:04:59.000 We talk about it.

02:05:00.000 I'm not trying to make money.

02:05:02.000 I'm 100% trying to not lose money, and that's it.

02:05:05.000 And everything else is gravy.

02:05:06.000 And then set it up right for the comedians.

02:05:08.000 The most important thing is to...

02:05:11.000 Look, if I care about comedy, which I clearly do, let's set up the best possible environment for comedy to thrive.

02:05:17.000 Yeah.

02:05:18.000 And it'll be great for everybody.

02:05:19.000 Yeah, I remember, like, I understand that.

02:05:23.000 I feel like so much of it is, like, getting out of your own way, too.

02:05:27.000 When I first started comedy, I would get these opportunities that I would say no to because I told myself I wasn't ready, I didn't...

02:05:33.000 Et cetera, et cetera.

02:05:35.000 And this time I'm like, I'm just saying yes, I'm going to say yes.

02:05:38.000 And not get out of here and just say yes.

02:05:41.000 Like, yes, thank you.

02:05:42.000 And Colin Quinn asked me to open for him.

02:05:46.000 And I was like, yes, thank you.

02:05:49.000 And I was terrified.

02:05:51.000 And I was like, I have such bad stage fright as it is.

02:05:55.000 Just ever since I got sober, it's something I deal with.

02:05:58.000 Because I used to be drunk all the time and I didn't know until I got sober.

02:06:01.000 So you get drunk on stage? 0.99

02:06:02.000 I would be drunk before I even got up, but I got sober and was like, fuck, I have stage fright. 0.99

02:06:06.000 And it's so bad. 1.00

02:06:08.000 Joe, it's so bad that I'll be like, maybe my dog will die.

02:06:11.000 You know, like, maybe there will be, like, when the planes were all getting grounded, I'm like, maybe Colin was stuck in New York.

02:06:19.000 Like, terrified.

02:06:20.000 So you're, like, trying to avoid the show.

02:06:21.000 And I have to just put that aside, put it all aside.

02:06:24.000 I truly just had to, like, pray, turn it over, and it's like, It's not about me.

02:06:31.000 It's about just getting out of my way.

02:06:33.000 My job is to...

02:06:34.000 You're an antenna.

02:06:37.000 And it's just like, these people want to have fun.

02:06:40.000 And someone sent me the clip, because my audience knew I was nervous.

02:06:47.000 I didn't announce it or anything, but I did in my little subscriber community.

02:06:52.000 And someone sent me the clip of you and Sam talking about stand-up and how you still got nervous.

02:06:58.000 You were saying, I stretch and breathe.

02:07:01.000 But Sam said, he has that tattoo, this is fun.

02:07:05.000 Yeah.

02:07:05.000 And I was like, I wrote it on my set list.

02:07:08.000 I'm like, it fucking saved me. 0.70

02:07:11.000 It was like two days before. 0.87

02:07:12.000 I'm like, I'm just gonna...

02:07:14.000 Have fun.

02:07:15.000 And I had so much fun.

02:07:18.000 You can see it on my face in the pictures.

02:07:20.000 I love them.

02:07:20.000 And Troy was there, and I had so much fun.

02:07:24.000 It makes sense to have stage fright if you used to get drunk all the time.

02:07:26.000 It also makes sense to have stage fright if you haven't done a lot of comedy.

02:07:29.000 So it was a long time before you did comedy again.

02:07:32.000 How much time did you take off?

02:07:33.000 I mean, four, three years?

02:07:36.000 Three years.

02:07:37.000 Yeah, it's a long time.

02:07:38.000 A baby.

02:07:39.000 It's a long time.

02:07:40.000 Yeah.

02:07:40.000 But then I have been grinding again, just quietly, working towards more and more and more, and it's like...

02:07:53.000 It's been 10 months, you know?

02:07:57.000 So it was like, not like I just got back and was like, alright, yes!

02:08:02.000 If that was the case, I would have said no.

02:08:05.000 I have too much respect for you and Adam and all of these other comedians, every other comedian that I know.

02:08:12.000 To not be ready.

02:08:13.000 To know that like, okay, I can probably handle this.

02:08:18.000 Well, you know, even like Chris Rock, one of the all-time greats, he took years off.

02:08:22.000 Yeah.

02:08:23.000 And then when he came back, he had to kind of find his thing.

02:08:25.000 Yeah, you got it.

02:08:26.000 I mean, I'm a different person.

02:08:27.000 Of course.

02:08:28.000 So I also had to write completely all-new material.

02:08:30.000 It wasn't like I could just rely on old stuff.

02:08:33.000 It doesn't even connect.

02:08:35.000 Right.

02:08:35.000 I've moved.

02:08:37.000 I'm a married woman. 0.98

02:08:39.000 I can't be like, back when I was giving blowjobs... 0.99

02:08:43.000 Yeah. 0.99

02:08:44.000 And it's very humbling.

02:08:46.000 It was weird, too.

02:08:47.000 I can see why people who do it, take a break, start doing something else, get a name doing something else, and then come back to comedy, it's like I'm a beginner.

02:08:59.000 I feel like a beginner.

02:09:01.000 Sure.

02:09:01.000 I'm not a beginner.

02:09:02.000 I know what I do wrong.

02:09:03.000 The difference is I know when I'm doing something wrong, I know what I'm doing wrong.

02:09:06.000 Well, we used to always see that at the comedy store.

02:09:08.000 We used to always see people like sitcom stars who would come in and they were like, I'm going to try to start doing comedy again.

02:09:14.000 And, you know, they'd get stacked in there against a bunch of assassins.

02:09:17.000 Yeah.

02:09:18.000 And it would be rough.

02:09:19.000 Yeah.

02:09:19.000 Like Kramer.

02:09:21.000 Yeah.

02:09:21.000 Michael Richardson.

02:09:22.000 He was doing that.

02:09:24.000 After Seinfeld, he went a little crazy.

02:09:26.000 I think that had something to do with that.

02:09:31.000 But he was at the Comedy Store and it was weird because he would go on after real comics.

02:09:36.000 And then he would be falling around on stage and it was improvised and it wasn't really...

02:09:42.000 It wasn't, you know, it's not 1978. No, no.

02:09:45.000 The world's a different place, man.

02:09:47.000 Yeah, and just having, like, that's the, again, it was just like an ego, like, having to put aside, like, okay, like, whatever.

02:09:58.000 I'll take three minutes, I'll take five minutes, I'll take, I'll drive however long, like, that beginner's mind was so necessary.

02:10:07.000 And even, like, opening for killers like Landau, just being able to, like, You know, it's a confidence thing, too.

02:10:14.000 You have to just get hit with that over and over and over again.

02:10:18.000 Yeah, you have to do the numbers.

02:10:19.000 You have to get back in shape again.

02:10:21.000 If you haven't ran in five years, you can't run a marathon.

02:10:24.000 You have to start doing runs around the block.

02:10:26.000 I love it.

02:10:26.000 It's been so...

02:10:28.000 Yeah, I love it. 1.00

02:10:30.000 I was like, fuck. 1.00

02:10:32.000 It's a fun time for comedy, too, because the world's on fire. 1.00

02:10:35.000 Yeah, well, it's great. 1.00

02:10:37.000 There's so much crazy shit. 1.00

02:10:37.000 And that's the thing. 1.00

02:10:38.000 I did it because it's like the only time I feel sane, you know?

02:10:43.000 I mean, I feel sane a lot, but when I get on stage and I'm talking, it's like my mind is like zen.

02:10:50.000 There's just a calm, you know?

02:10:53.000 That's interesting.

02:10:54.000 I feel very present in that like... 0.97

02:10:59.000 conversation you're having it's just I don't know there's nothing yeah I think it's just I think I fought it for a long time like I just didn't I was like I don't know I don't have what it takes I don't have the chops I don't have the talent all this shit but it's like just get it out it's garbage It's a hard thing to do. 0.88

02:11:19.000 People don't like hard things. 0.62

02:11:21.000 They'll come up with reasons why they don't do hard things.

02:11:23.000 It's funny.

02:11:24.000 Francis Ngannou, who's a former UFC heavyweight champion, he was talking about people going to school because they're trying to avoid a job.

02:11:32.000 The way he said it, I was like, sometimes...

02:11:34.000 Yeah.

02:11:35.000 Just avoiding working.

02:11:36.000 Oh, yeah.

02:11:37.000 They're staying in school.

02:11:38.000 You're getting like your second PhD.

02:11:40.000 That's exactly what it is.

02:11:41.000 Yeah.

02:11:41.000 It's true.

02:11:42.000 And you're still doing something, but you are avoiding.

02:11:45.000 And those are the people that wind up teaching, which is even crazier because they've never really experienced the real world.

02:11:50.000 You know, they're shaping young people to prepare them for the real world.

02:11:53.000 Yeah.

02:11:56.000 It's going to be really interesting to see what happens if Trump gets into office, how much gets changed, how much the society shifts, because it does seem like society is shifting away from all the woke stuff in the left wing and even people that were like former lifelong Democrats like Bill Ackman and all these people that are talking about voting for Trump.

02:12:16.000 Elon, all these people that are talking about, like, this is what we have to fight against.

02:12:20.000 But then they're gonna realize, like, they're right-wing.

02:12:22.000 They're trying to track your periods.

02:12:27.000 They try to bring Jesus back into the schools.

02:12:29.000 I've learned from being very wrong on this podcast many times, and having the entire world tell me about it, that Like, she raised $100 million in a day.

02:12:41.000 Come on.

02:12:42.000 Right.

02:12:42.000 How much of it came from Satan?

02:12:44.000 Actually.

02:12:47.000 You mean Hillary Clinton? 0.96

02:12:49.000 No, I mean Satan, Satan. 0.94

02:12:50.000 Maybe it is Hillary. 0.99

02:12:51.000 Satan, Satan. 0.91

02:12:52.000 Where's that money coming from?

02:12:54.000 Allegedly a lot of first-time donors.

02:12:56.000 Okay.

02:12:56.000 Maybe.

02:12:57.000 Maybe.

02:12:58.000 Maybe. 1.00

02:12:58.000 Maybe people are that dumb. 1.00

02:13:00.000 Maybe they never heard her talk. 1.00

02:13:01.000 Maybe they don't care.

02:13:03.000 Maybe it's blue no matter who.

02:13:04.000 Last time we were talking, I think it was like there was going to be a red wave, and then I was like, eh, that one wasn't true.

02:13:10.000 It's interesting.

02:13:12.000 Because I underestimated how much the abortion thing would play into it.

02:13:16.000 Yeah, that plays into it a lot.

02:13:18.000 But it almost feels like that's all engineered to keep us like at each other's throats, like nothing ever got resolved.

02:13:24.000 Like there's one of the things that they were thinking when they were banning abortions was gay marriage is going to be next.

02:13:29.000 And some people have openly stated that gay marriage should be next and that that's the thing that they do want to stop next.

02:13:35.000 And I'm like, this seems fake.

02:13:37.000 It seems like if you really care about that, that seems crazy.

02:13:40.000 I think what you care about is consistently keeping people at each other's throats.

02:13:45.000 Right.

02:13:45.000 I wrote this piece that went crazy viral.

02:13:49.000 It was trending on Twitter.

02:13:50.000 It was very unexpected about divorce, just coming from divorce. 0.98

02:13:54.000 And I was like, hey, divorce sucks.

02:13:57.000 And my point was kind of like, even as an adult with a kid, I didn't realize how much of an effect it has even later in life when you have your own kids.

02:14:06.000 Things like my siblings have had to deal with.

02:14:10.000 People, the reaction was crazy, but then the kind of counter-reaction was from the left.

02:14:15.000 They were like, and this is when they're coming after divorce laws, and they're trying to get rid of no-fault divorce, and they're trying to make it so women need to get approval to get divorced. 0.97

02:14:28.000 You're saying that they were lumping you?

02:14:29.000 Well, they were saying that I was, I mean, this is like the blue and on stuff where it's like, oh, you're just, they were like, how much did the evangelicals pay you to write this piece?

02:14:39.000 I'm like, yes, the evangelicals, years ago, my parents got divorced and I became my deep state plant so that I could write this piece to undermine the divorce laws.

02:14:52.000 That's exactly right.

02:14:53.000 I mean, it's like craziness, but this is...

02:14:56.000 But I think a lot of those people aren't even real people.

02:14:58.000 I think a lot of that is bots.

02:15:00.000 Bots.

02:15:00.000 And a lot of that is, I mean, you have to really consider that.

02:15:03.000 Oh, I definitely do.

02:15:05.000 Which is why I think it's really foolish for people to engage in any sort of disagreements online.

02:15:09.000 I think so much of the conversation is pushed in one way or another by people that aren't even real people.

02:15:15.000 Oh, right.

02:15:16.000 Like those bot farms?

02:15:17.000 Yeah.

02:15:18.000 Have you seen them with all the phones?

02:15:20.000 It's not just that.

02:15:21.000 It's crazy.

02:15:22.000 They show you that, but you don't think our government's doing that. 1.00

02:15:24.000 You're out of your fucking mind. 1.00

02:15:26.000 If you don't think that they are online posing as progressives, having these complex sites with AI-generated photos of their family, they are. 1.00

02:15:36.000 Every government does it, and the goal is to divide and conquer.

02:15:40.000 The best way to conquer is to keep us at each other's throats.

02:15:43.000 The best way to keep infringing on our rights is to have you agree with this infringement, because this infringement goes against those people that you oppose, which are the people on the other team. 0.99

02:15:52.000 And that's the dirty, dirty, dirty trick that people fall for every goddamn time. 0.97

02:15:56.000 That's what leads to the downfall of civilizations. 0.99

02:15:59.000 How do we get out of it?

02:16:01.000 Mushrooms.

02:16:02.000 That would be the only way.

02:16:04.000 I don't know.

02:16:04.000 Maybe aliens land.

02:16:05.000 Maybe Donald Trump takes over and everybody starts doing bong hits out of a fucking American eagle flag thing. 0.99

02:16:13.000 What's it called? 0.99

02:16:13.000 Freedom bong? 0.99

02:16:14.000 Freedom bong?

02:16:15.000 Yeah.

02:16:16.000 I'll vote for whoever stops those frickin' wind farms off the coast. 0.99

02:16:20.000 The wind thing's nuts. 0.87

02:16:22.000 They should have gone down the road of nuclear power plants a long fuckin' time ago. 0.52

02:16:28.000 The thing is, people are afraid of them because of Chernobyl and Three Mile Island.

02:16:32.000 And they're not like that anymore.

02:16:33.000 Not only are they not like that anymore, it is literally the greenest source of energy that we have.

02:16:38.000 They know how to shut them down now.

02:16:39.000 There's ways to avoid it.

02:16:41.000 There's even companies that are investing in making batteries out of the waste.

02:16:45.000 Did you see all this stuff like with Nantucket?

02:16:47.000 The beaches were all closed because one of the turbines fell and then the beach was like getting fiberglass and there's dead whales on Black Island and all up and down there.

02:16:55.000 I'm like, this is a- What are the dead whales from? 0.99

02:16:57.000 From the fucking wind farm. 0.99

02:16:58.000 Schellenberger covers all this. 0.99

02:17:00.000 He's been doing a whole documentary. 0.74

02:17:02.000 It's because it's fucking with all their- They're like sonar stuff, and it gives off this vibration. 0.90

02:17:08.000 And it is an ecological... 0.99

02:17:09.000 Like, these are the fucking save the whales people, and this is killing the whales. 0.97

02:17:14.000 So they're killing the whales with the sounds of the windmill things? 0.99

02:17:17.000 Oh, it's an ecological disaster, these things.

02:17:19.000 They should not be allowed.

02:17:20.000 They should be shut down.

02:17:22.000 I don't know how they even got through, and it's just...

02:17:25.000 They don't even generate that much electricity.

02:17:27.000 One percent.

02:17:28.000 I was watching all the hearings in Nantucket because they never got to vote on it either.

02:17:32.000 This is another one of those things that just like people were like, yeah, we need tax cuts.

02:17:37.000 And for our company, it's GE. And I think it was GE. And so they were like, this is one percent of it generates like one percent extra energy for us.

02:17:47.000 It's nothing.

02:17:48.000 There was a boat that got attacked by a whale today.

02:17:51.000 A boat that got flipped over by a whale.

02:17:53.000 An actual whale flipped over a boat.

02:17:56.000 A blue whale or an orca?

02:17:58.000 I don't know what kind of whale, but a big-ass whale.

02:18:01.000 A whale whale.

02:18:01.000 Yeah, this whale.

02:18:02.000 What happened?

02:18:03.000 See, a whale capsized the boat off the coast of Rye, New Hampshire, Tuesday. 0.99

02:18:07.000 Damn. 0.99

02:18:08.000 Watch that again. 1.00

02:18:09.000 Because it's crazy.

02:18:11.000 Oh, wow.

02:18:11.000 Whale just jumps up and smashes this boat and flips it over.

02:18:15.000 And that guy falls in the water. 0.71

02:18:16.000 And this kid's like, let me get the fuck out of here.

02:18:18.000 Like, I don't know what happened and why the whales are attacking boats. 0.93

02:18:21.000 Is that saying Yellowstone's biscuit base erupts?

02:18:24.000 Excuse me?

02:18:25.000 To the explore.

02:18:26.000 Biscuit Basin erupts. 0.99

02:18:28.000 Is Yellowstone fucking blasting? 0.99

02:18:30.000 Oh yeah, that's great. 0.99

02:18:31.000 That's next.

02:18:32.000 Yellowstone's gonna blow.

02:18:33.000 Super volcano.

02:18:34.000 Whales are attacking people. 1.00

02:18:38.000 Let's wrap this up.

02:18:39.000 Bridget, I love you.

02:18:40.000 You're awesome.

02:18:41.000 I love you too.

02:18:41.000 It's great to see you always.

02:18:42.000 I'm glad you're enjoying it here.

02:18:43.000 I love it.

02:18:44.000 Love you and thank you.

02:18:46.000 Tell everybody your podcast, where they can get Dumpster Fire.

02:18:48.000 Just go to Phetasy.com.

02:18:50.000 It's all there.

02:18:51.000 We just took it all.

02:18:51.000 P-H-E-T-A-S-Y dot com.

02:18:54.000 And subscribe to our YouTube, Bridget Phetasy.

02:18:56.000 That would be the best thing you can do.

02:18:58.000 Best thing you can do.

02:19:00.000 Alright, bye everybody.

02:19:01.000 Bye!

The Joe Rogan Experience - July 24, 2024

Joe Rogan Experience #2179 - Bridget Phetasy

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