The Joe Rogan Experience - May 23, 2012


Joe Rogan Experience #219 - Joey Diaz

Topics
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Hosted by
Joe Rogan
Mentioned
Joe Rogan Podcast Joey Meatballs Obama Burt Reynolds Daniel Cormier Brian Redband Richard Simmons Tracy Lords Josh Barnett Jesus Christ Will Smith Mike Tyson Anderson Cooper Carlos Santana Tom Platt Earl Campbell Penn Jillette Georgia Lynn Led Zeppelin Doug Benson and 125 more
Joe Rogan Experience #218 - Dom Irrera Joe Rogan Experience #220 - Bert Kreischer

Episode Stats


Length

2 hours and 26 minutes

Words per minute

204.65

Word count

29,883

Sentence count

3,744

Harmful content

Misogyny

154

sentences flagged

Toxicity

1,595

sentences flagged

Hate speech

97

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Joe Rogan is back and better than ever. He talks about the new Weight Watchers motto "If you're not hungry enough for an apple, you ain't hungry" and why he doesn't need to go to the gym after he's had sex. He also talks about testosterone and why you should stop ejaculating after you've had sex because your dick is going to stop making as many loads. And he talks about how to get a good night's rest without going to the bathroom. Joe Rogan Experience is brought to you by Onnit. Onnit is the world's largest online sex shop and is home to some of the best sex shops in the entire world. They have everything you could ever want and then some. Onnit has it all, including the best service in the whole world. All you need to do is go buy a bottle of Onnit and you'll be set for the rest of your life. You don't even have to pay a dime to use Onnit's amazing service. You get 10% off the first order and you get a 100% money back guarantee for the first 30 pills you order. All you get is 100% back guarantee and you don't have to return the product until the end of the month. Shroom TechSport is a company that gives you the best experience in the world. It's the best high-performance mushroom supplements you can get anywhere else. ShroomTech Sport is the best in the best at making your brain buzz and boost your brain, your brain cells and brain cells. You can't get better than they can get from your brain and your brain is better than that way. You can get a better day in the rest and your body can improve your day to day life, day after day and you won't even notice you're getting more rest and more rest, you'll feel better than you're going to be more productive and you can have more energy and more sleep, you're gonna feel better at work, you can go to sleep faster, you won t have less stress and you will have more money, you will get more sleep and more energy, you are going to have more of everything you need it, you get it all day to do it, it's all day, you need more of it, and you need less of it and more of that, you don t have to be less stress, you aren't going to feel like you're more of a day to think about it, etc.

Transcript

Transcripts from "The Joe Rogan Experience" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.000 Free. 1.00
00:00:00.000 You can't hold that pussy over my head. 1.00
00:00:02.000 Because I don't need it right now. 1.00
00:00:03.000 I'm good.
00:00:04.000 So now I see someone annoying.
00:00:06.000 I see someone annoying that I don't want to be around.
00:00:08.000 That's pretty good for Dead Squad because Weight Watchers has a motto.
00:00:12.000 Right. 0.98
00:00:12.000 If you're not hungry enough for an apple, you ain't fucking hungry. 0.98
00:00:16.000 Right? 0.94
00:00:16.000 Which makes all the sense in the world. 0.94
00:00:18.000 Really? 0.94
00:00:18.000 If you're not hungry enough for an apple, you ain't fucking hungry. 0.94
00:00:21.000 That's a weird motto. 0.99
00:00:22.000 Do they use the word fucking in that motto? 0.99
00:00:24.000 No, I just dropped it in there for effect. 1.00
00:00:27.000 But it's funny, like, they should have a motto for if you still want to go fuck a crack hole and get blow after you've whacked off, then go. 0.99
00:00:34.000 I don't think you'll find the energy. 1.00
00:00:36.000 Once you whack off and cut your legs right off, if you sit there for 30, like, if you come to me and go, dog, I need $300, I'm gonna go kill a crack hole and get some coke and... 1.00
00:00:44.000 What would a heavyweight title fight look like if, like, say if you watch a boxing match, and then halfway into the boxing match, there's like a three, like at the third round, there's a break, and some hot chick comes in and blows a dude. 0.99
00:00:59.000 And then after he shoots his nut, he's got to go out and fight the next three rounds.
00:01:04.000 It would be interesting to watch, you know, like how many dudes fought well after they ejaculated and how many dudes just completely fell apart, just turned all up. 0.99
00:01:14.000 Because that takes the fucking fire out of it. 0.98
00:01:16.000 That's what, what does he say? 1.00
00:01:17.000 Women, weak, and legs. 1.00
00:01:18.000 Women, weak, and legs rock. 1.00
00:01:20.000 Well, they say that when you do it for seven days, when you abstain from ejaculation by seven days, your testosterone can go up, I think it's as high as 50%. 0.92
00:01:31.000 But it normalizes after that. 1.00
00:01:34.000 And then it's like, well, this loser just doesn't get any pussy. 1.00
00:01:36.000 Let's just stop making loads. 1.00
00:01:37.000 And then your body stops making as many loads.
00:01:40.000 Like, apparently, your body consistently makes loads as long as you're using them.
00:01:44.000 Like, that's the idea behind it.
00:01:45.000 Absolutely. 1.00
00:01:47.000 I keep pumping, you keep fucking humping. 1.00
00:01:49.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:01:51.000 Anyway, the Joe Rogan Experience podcast is brought to you by, I think we covered the Fleshlight in that, didn't we? 0.99
00:01:57.000 Yeah, I think Fleshlights are awesome, fuck. 1.00
00:01:58.000 Yeah, go fuck those. 1.00
00:02:00.000 On it, makers of AlphaBrain. 1.00
00:02:02.000 What's AlphaBrain?
00:02:03.000 It's a nootropic.
00:02:04.000 Vitamins for your noggin.
00:02:06.000 It's essentially a bunch of select herbs and vitamins that have been known to enhance cognitive function.
00:02:14.000 It's a very controversial subject.
00:02:15.000 I believe in it.
00:02:16.000 I've been taking these long before we ever endorsed Alpha Brain.
00:02:20.000 I took a bunch of stuff.
00:02:21.000 And oh, I've been in contact with Mr. Romanowski, Bill Romanowski, through Twitter.
00:02:26.000 He's the guy that invented Neuro One.
00:02:28.000 He's a famous football player.
00:02:30.000 And that's how I got into Nootropics, is Neuro One.
00:02:33.000 If you're at a store and you ever see that, it's an awesome blend that he put together.
00:02:39.000 Alpha Brain, it's all very similar.
00:02:42.000 It's all designed to stimulate your brain's production of neurotransmitters.
00:02:47.000 And it just makes me feel like I can put sentences together better.
00:02:52.000 I feel like a little bit smoother.
00:02:54.000 You know, it's not like limitless. 1.00
00:02:57.000 It's not going to turn you into a genius if you're a moron. 1.00
00:03:00.000 But it does work. 1.00
00:03:02.000 And there's a 100% money back guarantee for the first 30 pills.
00:03:05.000 You don't even have to return the product.
00:03:07.000 You just say this stuff didn't work and we give you your money back.
00:03:10.000 We're trying as hard as humanly possible to not rip anybody off and sell really high quality stuff that I believe in.
00:03:18.000 Shroom Tech Sport is the one that I talk about that I take every time I work out. 0.99
00:03:23.000 It's the shit. 0.99
00:03:24.000 It gives you tremendous energy. 1.00
00:03:25.000 It's all vitamin B12 and cordyceps mushrooms.
00:03:28.000 It's one of my favorite things ever, like supplements for a pre-workout.
00:03:32.000 There's Shroom Tech Immune and there's 5-HTP enhanced with L-tryptophan.
00:03:38.000 It's called New Mood.
00:03:39.000 All the stuff is explained on Onnit.com.
00:03:42.000 And again, everything is 100% money back guarantee for the first order. 0.97
00:03:46.000 You don't even have to return the product, just say it sucks.
00:03:49.000 And use the code name ROGAN and save yourself 10%.
00:03:52.000 Alright ladies and gentlemen, the official beginning is now.
00:03:57.000 Thanks to C2O Coconut Water for hooking us up.
00:04:03.000 The Joe Rogan Podcast, check it out!
00:04:05.000 The Joe Rogan Experience.
00:04:07.000 Train by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night, all day.
00:04:14.000 Dude, I drank some dishwater coconut water yesterday.
00:04:17.000 I found there's a big difference in coconut water.
00:04:20.000 Yes, there is.
00:04:21.000 We found this out with C2O, the company.
00:04:24.000 Those guys came to visit us at Brea when we were at the Improv.
00:04:29.000 And they said the Thai coconuts are what you want.
00:04:32.000 It's like a short tree.
00:04:33.000 It's only like a five-foot tree or something like that.
00:04:34.000 And it's not like what we think of these giant palm trees with coconuts.
00:04:38.000 It's not like that.
00:04:39.000 It's a shorter tree and it's like a sweeter coconut. 0.98
00:04:42.000 But all those cans go fucking sour anyway. 0.99
00:04:45.000 They all go sour. 1.00
00:04:46.000 They all go fucking sour. 0.99
00:04:47.000 Zima, CO2, I got them at the house. 1.00
00:04:49.000 So tell them to blow that smoke up somebody else's ass. 1.00
00:04:52.000 That's why I finally tapped out and I got a little Mexican on violin and fucking right there. 1.00
00:04:56.000 Four dollars. 0.99
00:04:57.000 He gives me the whole fucking coconut food right there. 0.99
00:05:00.000 For an extra three, if you do blood, he'll trim it around like a margarita with coke. 1.00
00:05:03.000 Stop with those cans of shit because they all go fucking sour. 1.00
00:05:07.000 There's a great place called... 1.00
00:05:08.000 They all go fucking south. 0.99
00:05:08.000 In LA, there's a great place called Press Juicery, and they deliver them to your house. 0.99
00:05:13.000 Oh, please.
00:05:13.000 Delicious.
00:05:13.000 And they deliver fresh coconut water from you.
00:05:15.000 That's the only way to drink coconut water, Doug.
00:05:17.000 I gave up.
00:05:17.000 It tastes so much better.
00:05:18.000 I gave up.
00:05:19.000 It tastes so much better when it's, like, right fresh and raw, like, out of the fruit.
00:05:24.000 Yeah. 0.98
00:05:24.000 I got a case from the CO2, and it's fucking all sour. 0.98
00:05:28.000 C2O? Yeah, it's all fucking sour. 0.99
00:05:30.000 And the one before that was fucking sour, too. 1.00
00:05:33.000 Stop! 1.00
00:05:34.000 They're in the refrigerator.
00:05:35.000 I've never drank it once that was sour.
00:05:37.000 I'll put some sugar in it. 0.98
00:05:38.000 When that coconut goes a little fucking sideways... 0.99
00:05:41.000 What are you doing with those cans? 0.98
00:05:42.000 Sometimes you just put a little sugar in there, and you dope it up with some ice cubes and you shake it up.
00:05:47.000 Sometimes if it's warm up...
00:05:48.000 Bro, trust me. 1.00
00:05:49.000 I was drinking coconut water when you were in Columbus fucking drinking Coca-Cola. 1.00
00:05:52.000 Out of a red can, cocksucker. 1.00
00:05:54.000 I was going to Puerto Rico in the fucking 70s. 1.00
00:05:56.000 When you could buy the big fucking coconuts, there was no Thai around. 1.00
00:06:00.000 In 1970, there was no Thai food. 0.98
00:06:02.000 There was no Thais around, so knock it off with the Thai trees. 1.00
00:06:04.000 When did the Thais get here? 1.00
00:06:05.000 In fucking like 78 after kickboxing, after kickboxing 1. That's when they fucking showed up. 0.99
00:06:10.000 When I got to this country, it was Chinese, a couple fucking Japs, and a couple fucking Koreans. 1.00
00:06:15.000 Don't start that shit. 1.00
00:06:16.000 The tie came later. 1.00
00:06:17.000 Later on, all dark and shit. 1.00
00:06:19.000 Creepy looking, whatever the fuck. 1.00
00:06:21.000 I don't know. 1.00
00:06:21.000 Fucking dark skin. 1.00
00:06:23.000 I don't know what the fuck they are. 1.00
00:06:24.000 I don't know if they have Puerto Rican or they're fucking Chinese. 1.00
00:06:26.000 When the ties came along, the whole porno industry got tossed on its head. 1.00
00:06:30.000 Fuck yeah, those ties are filthy. 1.00
00:06:31.000 Those chicks are animals. 1.00
00:06:32.000 Before the ties came around, look, not even ties, but there was some sort of an Asian invasion that happened. 0.99
00:06:39.000 Because before that, it was very rare that you see Asian porn stars. 0.59
00:06:43.000 That is like a gang of them. 0.75
00:06:44.000 And I love it. 1.00
00:06:45.000 I love to see dirty Asian bitches. 1.00
00:06:46.000 Except those really dirty ones. 1.00
00:06:48.000 Some of the dirtiest ones ever.
00:06:49.000 Do you have that one on your podcast?
00:06:51.000 One of the podcasts?
00:06:52.000 Was it the Naughty Show?
00:06:54.000 Asa Akira.
00:06:55.000 Is she nasty? 1.00
00:06:56.000 She's beautiful too. 0.76
00:06:58.000 Look at the one with her.
00:06:59.000 I can't watch those, man.
00:07:01.000 She gets brutalized.
00:07:02.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:07:04.000 Oh, gagged and tied up and face fucked. 1.00
00:07:06.000 No. 1.00
00:07:07.000 Oh, my God.
00:07:08.000 It's amazing.
00:07:08.000 You can't just do...
00:07:09.000 Something happens somewhere along the line.
00:07:12.000 You know, and I'm doing that Dave Attell show today, Dave's Old Porn.
00:07:16.000 I'm doing that right after I get out of here.
00:07:18.000 We sit down like mystery science theater style in front of an old porno film and you like mock it and make fun of it and pick it apart.
00:07:26.000 But those old shows, they were completely different. 0.78
00:07:29.000 You watch like an old porn, it was just people that got together and then they had sex. 0.92
00:07:33.000 You know? 0.83
00:07:34.000 It was like, it seemed so innocent in comparison.
00:07:36.000 Let's get down to basics. 1.00
00:07:37.000 You've been a fucking horny cocksucker all your life. 1.00
00:07:40.000 When was the last time you watched, what was the first time you watched porn? 1.00
00:07:44.000 I want you to explain to people, and how did you watch it?
00:07:47.000 First time you discovered porn, break it down for me right now.
00:07:50.000 The first time I discovered video porn, like a real porn, like on cassette, it was my dad.
00:07:57.000 A cassette?
00:07:58.000 Yeah.
00:07:58.000 A VHS. A VHS cassette.
00:08:01.000 Oh my god.
00:08:02.000 Yeah. 0.98
00:08:02.000 Well, let me tell you how long I fucking discovered it when it used to come to your house real to real. 0.98
00:08:07.000 Oh my God. 0.98
00:08:08.000 So for $8.95, you ordered it.
00:08:11.000 And somebody had to stay home from school.
00:08:13.000 Explain reel-to-reel to me.
00:08:14.000 Reel-to-reel was, you actually, if you ordered, $22 worth of porn.
00:08:18.000 Each porn reel was $1.99. 0.90
00:08:21.000 And this was when porn was just disgusting. 0.99
00:08:24.000 When it was just to the point where after that, either you became a freak or you fucking said, I don't even want to see that again. 0.99
00:08:30.000 That's what happened to me. 0.97
00:08:31.000 So what happened was for $19, not even, guys, I'm exaggerating.
00:08:34.000 For $12.95, you got three movies and a mini projector, Brian, in the mail.
00:08:39.000 A mini projector!
00:08:40.000 A mini projector, in the mail.
00:08:42.000 I remember this show. 0.99
00:08:43.000 So you had to fucking stay home. 0.99
00:08:44.000 It was right next to the ad for, do you get some kick sand in your face? 0.99
00:08:48.000 Do you remember that ad with the kick sand?
00:08:50.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:08:50.000 You went home, you sent Joe Weed at $3, and he sent you the whole muscle building chart.
00:08:54.000 Yeah.
00:08:55.000 Not the weights, but he also sent you a trophy.
00:08:57.000 You know how many of those trophies I had?
00:08:58.000 How many?
00:08:58.000 About 92 of them.
00:08:59.000 Just had to do a push-up. 0.83
00:09:01.000 Yeah.
00:09:01.000 You know what I'm saying?
00:09:01.000 I didn't do a push-up.
00:09:03.000 I just kept ordering Joe Weider. 0.99
00:09:04.000 So you had to fucking put the reel to reel. 0.99
00:09:07.000 Correct, Brian? 0.99
00:09:08.000 Yeah.
00:09:08.000 Tape it to the thing.
00:09:09.000 You had to do everything in those days.
00:09:12.000 You were the editor.
00:09:13.000 You had a splicer.
00:09:14.000 You had a splicer?
00:09:16.000 Yeah, bro.
00:09:17.000 It was crazy. 0.99
00:09:18.000 You had to put a sheet on your wall and hope that nobody came home until you got the sheet off the fucking wall. 0.97
00:09:24.000 For me, my buddies brought it over and we put the sheet in the attic. 0.98
00:09:27.000 And we all got together.
00:09:29.000 We smoked like a joint between seven of us. 0.97
00:09:31.000 And we were all excited to see this porn. 0.61
00:09:35.000 And it starts like ten, nine, eight. 1.00
00:09:39.000 And they showed this chick taking a piece of bread, putting a guy's cock. 0.99
00:09:42.000 And this was way before. 1.00
00:09:43.000 I don't know what the fuck they were doing to make these chicks do this shit in the 70s. 1.00
00:09:47.000 It wasn't heroin because he was awake. 1.00
00:09:49.000 She put the piece of bread, the guy's dick on the piece of bread, put Miracle Whip on it. 1.00
00:09:54.000 I'll never forget that memory. 0.99
00:09:56.000 And it wasn't even Wonder Bread. 0.99
00:09:57.000 It's that square fucking bread they give you like in county jail. 1.00
00:10:00.000 And the bitch put it and she bit into the guy's dick. 1.00
00:10:03.000 And I remember that me and my five little sixth grade friends looked at each other. 1.00
00:10:08.000 And that was the end of the fucking... 0.99
00:10:09.000 I don't know if we came in our pants. 0.99
00:10:10.000 I don't know if we were just mortified.
00:10:12.000 We never watched another porno again.
00:10:14.000 That was the end for me.
00:10:15.000 But when the film broke, I remember you had to stop.
00:10:17.000 Correct, Brian?
00:10:18.000 Yeah.
00:10:18.000 You had to stop whacking off and put the film back together.
00:10:22.000 Yeah, and it stuck because it wasn't like it was just like put the two pieces together.
00:10:25.000 You had to first trim and cut like a perfect cut.
00:10:28.000 Then you had to put it in the splicer and get this tape. 0.54
00:10:31.000 And you got a boner and you're sitting there rubbing it. 0.99
00:10:33.000 Oh, porn was tough. 0.99
00:10:34.000 It was horrible. 1.00
00:10:35.000 Porn was tough, dog. 0.99
00:10:37.000 You had to work for it.
00:10:38.000 That's why you had to work.
00:10:39.000 Remember when they would have stag films that they would show at bachelor parties?
00:10:46.000 At bachelor parties they would show stag films. 0.99
00:10:49.000 Like guys would get together and they would show films of people fucking. 0.99
00:10:53.000 And they would call them stag films. 0.99
00:10:55.000 But it was just porn. 0.92
00:10:56.000 It was porn. 0.69
00:10:56.000 There was nothing different. 0.69
00:10:57.000 But that's what they called it.
00:10:58.000 They called them stag films.
00:10:59.000 And they would show them at stag parties.
00:11:03.000 Wow.
00:11:03.000 Yeah.
00:11:04.000 How gross of that?
00:11:05.000 I can never even.
00:11:06.000 Then I went to a theater in Jersey. 0.99
00:11:08.000 Like one day my friend's like, Sunday nights they do this shit up in Jersey, dirty movies. 0.99
00:11:13.000 And you sit in the theater and watch it with other people? 1.00
00:11:14.000 That is disgusting.
00:11:16.000 That is the lowest point, but it's not even low. 0.56
00:11:19.000 Because you don't know.
00:11:19.000 You're 16. You figure, let's go have a few beers.
00:11:22.000 It's not gross until you go to the bathroom.
00:11:25.000 And you go to piss in the urinal.
00:11:27.000 And some guy just happens to pop out of store number two.
00:11:30.000 And he just stands next to you like he's looking for flowers.
00:11:32.000 Oh, God. 1.00
00:11:33.000 And when you fucking shake your dick, he's staring at your dick. 1.00
00:11:36.000 Oh, God. 1.00
00:11:36.000 And then you go back to your seat. 1.00
00:11:38.000 You tell your friends, when I went to the bathroom, there was some pervert in there. 1.00
00:11:42.000 You go back to the bathroom, you take your dick out. 1.00
00:11:44.000 Again, boom! 1.00
00:11:45.000 He bumps out of stall number two, and he's sitting next to you. 0.93
00:11:48.000 I mean, it would be so fucking creepy, the whole lifestyle.
00:11:51.000 There's a lot of dudes that are just into that. 0.92
00:11:53.000 What is it about sexuality that's so creepy? 0.99
00:11:56.000 Is it because it's so repressed?
00:11:57.000 But what is it about, like, that one desire that's so, like, gross?
00:12:04.000 You know?
00:12:05.000 It's just so undesirable.
00:12:06.000 Like, the idea.
00:12:07.000 Sexuality.
00:12:08.000 Like, the idea of you sitting in a room, like, that's a part of sexuality. 0.98
00:12:12.000 You sitting in a room, like, beating off to videos of people fucking, like, a bunch of other people in the room, too, and they're all like... 1.00
00:12:20.000 Like, looking up all together, like, what the fuck? 0.99
00:12:23.000 Why is that so creepy? 0.99
00:12:25.000 I don't know, but it is.
00:12:26.000 You know, if everyone was in there eating, fulfilling that desire, there's no issue.
00:12:30.000 There's nothing creepy about it.
00:12:32.000 You'd be in a room with a bunch of people, everybody's eating a sandwich, and there's no problems.
00:12:36.000 You know, we're all filling that desire, no issue.
00:12:38.000 Now, go back to that.
00:12:39.000 But a sexuality issue...
00:12:42.000 It's very private and very creepy.
00:12:44.000 Even though everybody does it, it's kind of mysterious.
00:12:46.000 So to sit in some room full of a bunch of people and everyone just openly admitting that we beat off and all sitting there together.
00:12:53.000 Oh, no, no.
00:12:54.000 Beating off in front of somebody else?
00:12:56.000 That's what they're all doing, man.
00:12:57.000 No, no, no, no.
00:12:57.000 That's what they're doing at those theaters.
00:12:59.000 Oh, no, no, no, no.
00:13:00.000 When they go to those theaters, they're not just watching the film and critiquing it. 1.00
00:13:05.000 Wow, her ass is huge. 1.00
00:13:06.000 How does she get all those dicks in there? 1.00
00:13:08.000 How do you fucking whack off at the movie theater watching the theater? 1.00
00:13:10.000 That's how Pee Wee Herman got arrested, remember? 0.99
00:13:11.000 Which is hilarious, man. 1.00
00:13:13.000 How the fuck do you get arrested for beating off at one of those fuck theaters? 1.00
00:13:17.000 Isn't that what you're supposed to do? 1.00
00:13:19.000 Aren't you supposed to beat off there? 0.85
00:13:20.000 No, I don't think you're supposed to beat off.
00:13:22.000 I think you have private rooms, like whack-off rooms, and bookstores are different. 0.96
00:13:27.000 The whole thing is ridiculous. 0.83
00:13:28.000 You know what's going on. 0.97
00:13:30.000 You're showing people blowing people, and you're getting upset because someone beats off in the crowd?
00:13:35.000 Look at your product.
00:13:36.000 Think of the 70s in New York.
00:13:38.000 What was the name of that club?
00:13:39.000 Where people went and paid money.
00:13:41.000 Sarah's Retreat.
00:13:42.000 Devil's Retreat.
00:13:44.000 Something's Retreat.
00:13:45.000 Play-Doh's Retreat.
00:13:45.000 Play-Doh's Retreat.
00:13:46.000 And what was that? 1.00
00:13:47.000 It was a sex club in the 70s and early 80s where you paid, you know, a thousand bucks the door and you went in there and you fucked 85,000 fucking people. 0.99
00:13:55.000 Play-Doh's Retreat. 0.99
00:13:56.000 You know, the thing that always got me about sex that...
00:14:00.000 You know, I've been addicted to drugs, so I understand the addiction is when I would get off the bus on 48th Street at 7.45 to go to work selling cars, and I would come home and roll a joint.
00:14:12.000 I would smoke it right there on 42nd Street.
00:14:14.000 I would just sit there and watch, not guys like you and I, but guys that had families, guys with suits on and a tie, that before they have to go on with their day, they would have to go into a peep show.
00:14:26.000 And you know who I would see a lot of?
00:14:28.000 And I'm not here to insult anybody.
00:14:29.000 I'd see a lot of Hasidic Jews.
00:14:32.000 Really? 1.00
00:14:32.000 A lot of Hasids would fucking run in there with their black on and their hats. 1.00
00:14:36.000 Where the Laugh Factory is today. 0.99
00:14:38.000 Where the Laugh Factory was in Manhattan.
00:14:40.000 That was originally a strip club on that whole corner. 0.99
00:14:43.000 That was strip club fucking world. 0.99
00:14:45.000 Not even strip club. 1.00
00:14:45.000 Beep shows where people fucking the circle and all that stuff. 1.00
00:14:49.000 But I remember I would sit outside of that. 0.88
00:14:51.000 You know, because you have to cross that street.
00:14:53.000 And I would just sit there and watch people.
00:14:55.000 And go, what would make somebody jump out of a train?
00:14:59.000 You could see them, like I used to leave the store to have to go get a half gram of Coke.
00:15:04.000 There's nothing else on your mind but that Coke. 0.99
00:15:06.000 I would see them walking off, walking outside 8th Avenue, Fucking walking left, and you could see their body language. 1.00
00:15:14.000 They weren't going to stop until they got to a fuck show to see some guy fuck a big, flat, black chick in the middle of a room, and some chick comes up to you with a tit, and you could suck it. 1.00
00:15:23.000 Here's this guy that has a family that lives in the suburbs, you know, from Jersey or Queens. 1.00
00:15:29.000 That's what always fucked me up. 1.00
00:15:31.000 Like, that's their fucking freak. 1.00
00:15:33.000 That's their freak. 1.00
00:15:34.000 My freak was doing two bumps and wagging off till 4 in the morning.
00:15:37.000 Theirs was... 1.00
00:15:39.000 Going right off the bus at 6 in the fucking morning to see two people fucking. 1.00
00:15:43.000 I remember the first time I ever bought porn, you had to go to an adult bookstore if you wanted to buy videos. 0.99
00:15:51.000 You could go to some video stores, like Blockbuster wouldn't carry them, but some mom and pop video stores.
00:15:58.000 Of course, you'd have to go through...
00:16:01.000 Saloon doors.
00:16:02.000 You'd have to go through saloon doors.
00:16:05.000 Or you'd go through beads.
00:16:07.000 But one time I went to an actual porn store to buy it. 0.99
00:16:12.000 And I remember thinking, really clearly thinking, don't fucking look at anybody. 0.98
00:16:18.000 Just get through this. 0.99
00:16:20.000 Go.
00:16:20.000 Go.
00:16:20.000 Find what you need.
00:16:21.000 Get the fuck out of here. 0.99
00:16:23.000 We're not here for small talk. 1.00
00:16:24.000 Like, I'm not one of these people.
00:16:26.000 I just need some...
00:16:26.000 I don't want to be like...
00:16:27.000 And then I started thinking about them.
00:16:28.000 Like, who are one of these people?
00:16:30.000 Like, you think about people that visit porn shops. 0.80
00:16:32.000 You go, ugh.
00:16:33.000 You know...
00:16:33.000 I don't want to hang out with any of those people.
00:16:35.000 People that go to visit porn shops.
00:16:37.000 Wait a minute, but I've visited a porn shop.
00:16:39.000 Why is it so creepy?
00:16:41.000 I don't know.
00:16:42.000 But the instinct automatically is that it is.
00:16:46.000 Taking care of your sexuality, especially yourself. 0.99
00:16:48.000 It seems like such a selfish, creepy, rat-like thing to do. 0.99
00:16:53.000 Just sitting there watching videos. 0.54
00:16:58.000 No drama, though.
00:16:59.000 No drama.
00:17:00.000 No drama. 0.89
00:17:01.000 You're whacking them.
00:17:01.000 Maybe some people are disillusioned from the world.
00:17:04.000 Maybe they just want to tap out for a while and going home putting a wig on and jerking off is fucking what they're into. 0.99
00:17:10.000 That's the beauty about what we do, that everybody's into something fucking different. 1.00
00:17:13.000 I understand somebody going to a porn store every day, because I go to the weed store every day. 0.98
00:17:20.000 So what's the fucking difference correlation in my head? 0.78
00:17:23.000 Well, the porn thing to me is fascinating because like porn girls, like there's like a huge number, a huge percentage of them who have had bad things happen to them when they were kids. 0.99
00:17:38.000 You know, a lot of traumatic like sexual type shit. 0.97
00:17:41.000 And it's not all of them, but it's a lot of them. 0.99
00:17:43.000 And so you get to look at it and go, this is crazy.
00:17:46.000 Like this is a whole industry That was created in many ways because of abuse.
00:17:53.000 And then that industry is something that feeds, you know, through these online videos, millions and billions of people.
00:18:03.000 But we're all supposed to, like, feel bad about it.
00:18:05.000 It's a weird sort of undercover, creepy thing.
00:18:11.000 You know, you couldn't go into business meetings and talk about your favorite porn sites.
00:18:14.000 You know, you can't just go there and, like, what are you guys doing? 1.00
00:18:16.000 You still going to U-Porn, you fucking noobs? 1.00
00:18:19.000 You know, hey, come on, you gotta check out, you know, XYZ, upyourassvideos.com, or, you know, All Asians, or whatever the fuck website it is. 1.00
00:18:27.000 There's, like, a hundred thousand, like, free porn websites online. 0.98
00:18:31.000 But you can't talk about them.
00:18:33.000 Everybody goes to work, and they just go, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:18:35.000 If you brought it up, you could get in trouble.
00:18:37.000 Like, if you shared that information with someone that you work with, you know, if like, what sites do you go to?
00:18:43.000 Oh, you know, mostly like fashion and baby sites, and what sites do you go to?
00:18:50.000 Have you been to E-Fucked?
00:18:52.000 I think it's called.
00:18:53.000 What?
00:18:54.000 It's E-F... U-C-T? U-K-T. What is it?
00:18:59.000 It's just like fucked up porn videos. 0.99
00:19:02.000 You know, it's kind of like old style project, but like that kind of feel. 1.00
00:19:06.000 But like, you know, the first one is this girl who's 18 has a whole hand in her vagina and getting fucked in the ass at the same time. 1.00
00:19:13.000 Oh my God. 1.00
00:19:14.000 And if you just look at the front page at all the crazy videos. 0.92
00:19:16.000 But anyways, that's my new favorite porn... 1.00
00:19:19.000 Shit. 1.00
00:19:20.000 It's just, the abuse porn is very strange. 0.99
00:19:24.000 This is what I was saying about watching like porn from like the 70s and the 80s. 0.92
00:19:28.000 They just had sex. 0.95
00:19:30.000 That's all they did. 0.99
00:19:31.000 I mean, they got together and then they had sex. 0.98
00:19:32.000 Like porn of today, it's like there's some really nutty things they're doing, man. 1.00
00:19:38.000 There's a lot of joking and gagging and fucking spitting on each other, spitting in mouths and stuff. 0.98
00:19:47.000 When we were in Ohio, me and Joey Diaz were in Ohio, I was over at my friend Shane's house because he had a baby, and Shane was showing me that he got the Playboy of the month and year that he was born, the issue, which was in 1974. And there was this person on there that, the centerfold, was the most beautiful woman ever, and I'm like obsessed with her now. 0.95
00:20:10.000 Her name is Marilyn Lang.
00:20:12.000 It's M-A-R-I-L-Y-N, Lang, L-A-N-G-E. What do you do? 1.00
00:20:18.000 What are you doing?
00:20:18.000 Are you a stalker?
00:20:19.000 No, no, no.
00:20:20.000 What's happening?
00:20:21.000 No, no.
00:20:21.000 Yeah, right?
00:20:22.000 But it was before implants.
00:20:24.000 It was so weird seeing Playboy that always used to be all natural women curves and boobs and stuff.
00:20:31.000 When did it become all bleach blonde? 0.70
00:20:34.000 Early 80s, right? 0.99
00:20:35.000 All big boobs. 1.00
00:20:36.000 Was it early 80s? 0.98
00:20:37.000 Late 70s?
00:20:38.000 I don't know.
00:20:38.000 It's amazing when you look at the evolution of the tit.
00:20:41.000 If you really look at a Playboy from 1969, you go, wow, even the fucking nipples were rounded, they were pointier. 0.99
00:20:49.000 You know, it's really weird what a woman looked like. 1.00
00:20:51.000 We've had this discussion before about the women of the 70s, you know, Natalie Wood, the crazy one that Steve McQueen was married to, Ally McGraw, I shouldn't call her crazy. 0.99
00:20:59.000 It wasn't her fault he smacked her to death on the fucking movie set. 0.99
00:21:03.000 But it's just you see those women and you see the women down. 1.00
00:21:06.000 I don't know.
00:21:06.000 I don't know if there's a difference.
00:21:07.000 I don't know.
00:21:08.000 Well, I think it's more exercise today and plastic surgery, for sure.
00:21:13.000 Plastic surgery. 0.98
00:21:14.000 It's weird where unnatural looking tits are normal. 1.00
00:21:18.000 Look at this fucking animal behind you. 1.00
00:21:20.000 She busted the scene. 1.00
00:21:22.000 She really did.
00:21:24.000 Pamela Anderson really... 0.94
00:21:25.000 And everybody in this room says, yeah, she's gross. 1.00
00:21:28.000 But at one time, you did look at this bitch and say, God damn! 1.00
00:21:32.000 She's hot as fuck in that picture, no doubt. 1.00
00:21:34.000 Yeah, she's hot as fuck. 1.00
00:21:35.000 But it is weird that we're looking at... 1.00
00:21:37.000 Those aren't really her tits. 1.00
00:21:39.000 Those are water bags under the skin. 0.99
00:21:42.000 There's a big surgical incision.
00:21:44.000 They stuff water bags under her skin, and it stretches it out to make, like, the nipples extend further and make the whole thing unnaturally tight and, you know, and swollen. 1.00
00:21:56.000 It's really kind of fucking crazy. 1.00
00:21:58.000 But you could tell that bitch's got good pussy. 1.00
00:22:00.000 You could tell she's got good pussy. 1.00
00:22:01.000 Oh, for sure. 1.00
00:22:02.000 Dr. Zhivago pussy. 1.00
00:22:04.000 How weird are the fake tits? 1.00
00:22:05.000 They're weird as fuck, man. 1.00
00:22:07.000 It's a crazy thing. 1.00
00:22:09.000 I think that's a fake nipple.
00:22:10.000 Or button. 0.99
00:22:11.000 No, that's a button, silly Billy. 0.85
00:22:13.000 That's just placed too perfectly. 0.99
00:22:15.000 Oh, you shut your pie down. 1.00
00:22:17.000 Yeah, she probably has a super pussy. 1.00
00:22:18.000 You know, when it comes to porn, I don't really... 1.00
00:22:21.000 When I worked at Captain Video, I worked at a video store in Aspen, Colorado for a while.
00:22:25.000 And they used to have, like, porn in those days.
00:22:27.000 In those sections, they had 12 boxes.
00:22:29.000 You know what I'm saying?
00:22:30.000 Like a video store had maybe six releases.
00:22:33.000 One of those releases were the Lynn sisters.
00:22:35.000 And I brought them home and get coked up with my girlfriend.
00:22:37.000 The Lynn sisters?
00:22:38.000 You know, Amber Lynn and Georgia Lynn or Lynn Lynn. 1.00
00:22:40.000 Oh, Ginger Lynn. 0.99
00:22:41.000 Ginger Lynn.
00:22:42.000 And then the other one was when that girl was busting out in the scene. 0.91
00:22:45.000 The one that was 14 and they let her find out she was 13. Like, I seen her movies.
00:22:51.000 Were you talking about Tracy Lourdes?
00:22:53.000 Tracy Lourdes.
00:22:53.000 Yeah, I think she was...
00:22:54.000 14. She was 18. There's one video that you can get, I think, where she's 18. Well, she did one called Tracy Does Japan.
00:23:02.000 Where she sticks a fucking octopus up a fucking pussy. 1.00
00:23:05.000 Come on. 1.00
00:23:06.000 Are you serious?
00:23:06.000 She did that?
00:23:07.000 Yeah, she was fucking crazy. 1.00
00:23:08.000 She put an octopus over his head? 1.00
00:23:10.000 Oh, I don't think you're right, Joey.
00:23:12.000 Gotta look it up.
00:23:12.000 Tracy does Tokyo, dog.
00:23:13.000 You don't forget shit like that. 1.00
00:23:15.000 You know me. 0.99
00:23:16.000 I gotta find out about this.
00:23:17.000 She was the original Tentacles?
00:23:19.000 Yeah, she was the... 0.98
00:23:20.000 I don't think so.
00:23:20.000 Because they were all trying to live up to the Led Zeppelin thing, but Tracy does...
00:23:24.000 What's the Led Zeppelin thing?
00:23:25.000 Zeppelin used to put octopus... 0.99
00:23:27.000 In Seattle, they shoved a shark up some chick's pussy in Seattle. 1.00
00:23:30.000 They were an orgy, dog. 1.00
00:23:31.000 What? 0.99
00:23:32.000 A little baby shark.
00:23:33.000 Yeah, Zeppelin was the real deal, dog. 1.00
00:23:35.000 Check one of the freak and there's a list freak, motherfucker. 1.00
00:23:38.000 It's in a couple books. 0.99
00:23:40.000 Oh man, I gotta see this now.
00:23:42.000 But Tracy did Tokyo. 0.78
00:23:43.000 There's an intro online.
00:23:46.000 You have to get it. 0.97
00:23:47.000 You gotta get the original fucking cut, the whole thing. 0.97
00:23:51.000 But Tracy Does Tokyo was when she went on. 0.99
00:23:53.000 And that was the last porn I watched. 1.00
00:23:54.000 It doesn't say anything about octopus up a girl's pussy. 1.00
00:23:56.000 It's not gonna tell you. 1.00
00:23:58.000 You know what I'm saying?
00:23:58.000 It's not gonna tell you.
00:23:59.000 She gets in this toilet and she puts it up her wiggles. 1.00
00:24:02.000 And I remember sitting in that room.
00:24:04.000 Because I used to...
00:24:04.000 You know how in those days you always had a movie on in the video store?
00:24:08.000 I was so crazy. 1.00
00:24:09.000 I'd put a fucking porn on. 1.00
00:24:10.000 And when people would come in with kids, I'd turn it the fuck off. 1.00
00:24:13.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:24:14.000 You know, I was living in another fucking dimension then. 0.95
00:24:17.000 So I remember putting it out and going, look at this, guys. 0.99
00:24:19.000 And I thought it was disgusting.
00:24:21.000 You know, I wasn't into that much of...
00:24:23.000 All that craziness. 0.97
00:24:24.000 Dog, my experience of porn is boogie nights. 0.93
00:24:28.000 This movie's online. 0.98
00:24:30.000 It's like the parts of it that aren't sex are online. 1.00
00:24:34.000 Yeah, dog, this is a wild fucking movie. 1.00
00:24:36.000 You know I ain't gonna drop bullshit. 1.00
00:24:37.000 Now, whenever I come here and drop fucked up knowledge, I don't know nothing about porn. 1.00
00:24:40.000 But I know that. 0.98
00:24:41.000 Isn't it crazy that Tracy Lourdes was like 16?
00:24:44.000 16?
00:24:45.000 Look at those pictures.
00:24:46.000 She's doing just hardcore. 0.99
00:24:47.000 Hard fucking core. 0.99
00:24:49.000 Hard core. 1.00
00:24:50.000 I got an idea. 0.99
00:24:51.000 Let's buy the movie and all masturbate in front of each other to it on the podcast. 0.97
00:24:55.000 Isn't it crazy that you can say that there's something wrong? 0.99
00:24:58.000 Like what she did.
00:25:00.000 There's something wrong.
00:25:01.000 It's crazy. 1.00
00:25:02.000 I mean, she obviously knew how to fuck. 1.00
00:25:04.000 She obviously looked like she should be getting fucked. 1.00
00:25:07.000 Right? 1.00
00:25:08.000 All the above.
00:25:09.000 All the pieces were in place. 0.99
00:25:10.000 Would you think that though if you never saw her get fucked though? 0.99
00:25:13.000 I mean, if she was just a fucking girl at Jamba Juice, you probably wouldn't think What kind of numbers? 0.99
00:25:17.000 I don't know. 0.99
00:25:17.000 What do you mean, what numbers world? 0.99
00:25:18.000 I think, you know, she obviously wears a lot of makeup in her videos. 0.99
00:25:21.000 Right.
00:25:21.000 That was what you were supposed to look like 30 years ago.
00:25:24.000 Look at those haircuts.
00:25:25.000 If you saw her when she was, you know, with no makeup and 16, dressed like a 16-year-old, you'd probably go, oh, that's like a young kid.
00:25:32.000 Yeah.
00:25:32.000 But...
00:25:33.000 It's like that little Ramsey kid.
00:25:35.000 It's a weird thing where it's like, what is the right year?
00:25:38.000 Like, no one agrees.
00:25:40.000 Like, some countries, it's like 16. Some parts of the world, it's 13. Some parts of this country, I think, it might be, like, really young.
00:25:46.000 You know, like, whatever the age of consent is.
00:25:48.000 I think most of them are leaning towards at least 17 now.
00:25:51.000 What do you think, as a parent, and as when you had sex at your age? 1.00
00:25:55.000 How old were you the first time you seen a fucking pussy? 1.00
00:25:58.000 Were you ready? 1.00
00:25:59.000 Were you really fucking ready? 0.98
00:26:00.000 I mean, I'm talking to you man to man. 0.99
00:26:01.000 Were you ready?
00:26:02.000 Yeah, I was okay.
00:26:04.000 I mean, I handled it.
00:26:04.000 It wasn't that big a deal.
00:26:05.000 But I think for kids, you know, for kids fucking around with kids, there's a different age. 0.94
00:26:11.000 You know, like, you can say the age of consent is 18. And if the age of consent is 18, that's, you know, that makes sense to me. 0.94
00:26:20.000 Because, I mean, 17-year-olds can still make out with each other.
00:26:22.000 You know, like, there should be, like, an age buffer where, like, an 18-year-old boyfriend...
00:26:28.000 Who's been with a girl since, you know, they were 16 and 14. She'd still be allowed to bang her, like, once he turns 19. Like, they've been boyfriend and girlfriend for three years.
00:26:36.000 You know what I'm saying?
00:26:37.000 Like, why can't they bang anymore just because he hit some magic number and she hasn't hit it yet?
00:26:41.000 That doesn't make any sense to me.
00:26:42.000 And there is a lot of that.
00:26:44.000 There's a lot of banging at 14. There's a lot of banging.
00:26:46.000 You bang the 14...
00:26:47.000 A lot of banging at 15, banging at 16. I banged a little bit at 14. I sucked some titties.
00:26:52.000 You know, were you ready for? 1.00
00:26:53.000 A lot of hand jobs. 0.99
00:26:54.000 Were you fucking ready for? 1.00
00:26:55.000 You know, the girl I was doing all that shit with is kind of retarded. 1.00
00:26:58.000 I looked at her Facebook page. 1.00
00:27:00.000 She's got a fucking ninja suit on. 1.00
00:27:01.000 She wasn't ready to see my Cuban egg roll at fucking 14. You know, I mean, then you have to refer to yourself as a parent. 1.00
00:27:09.000 what age do i think my son or my daughter is ready to fuck around the real question is what age can a man fuck your daughter that's the real question that's the real question because it's not can a 16 year old boy fuck a 16 year old girl yeah of course they can can a 17 year old boy fucking 16 year old girl i guess so can an 18 year old boy fuck a 16 year old girl yeah if she's mature can a No. 0.99
00:27:36.000 Can a 20-year-old... 1.00
00:27:37.000 You know what I'm saying?
00:27:37.000 It starts getting exponentially creepier.
00:27:40.000 And who's the judge of that?
00:27:42.000 Somebody in Kentucky probably thinks it's completely different, like it's 7 and 40. Yeah, there should be some sort of a standard, but I mean...
00:27:52.000 At a certain point in time, I just gotta let it go.
00:27:55.000 When are you ready, you know, when you look at your kids around you?
00:27:58.000 You know, whenever I meet people that have kids, I always ask the parents, how old are the kids?
00:28:04.000 When they say to me, he's 14, I look at that person, I go, look at that kid.
00:28:09.000 At that age, I was already doing a thousand things.
00:28:12.000 What a shame.
00:28:13.000 Because I wasn't ready for that.
00:28:15.000 What a shame.
00:28:15.000 Yeah, but you had a wild life.
00:28:17.000 Doesn't matter.
00:28:18.000 That was part of it.
00:28:19.000 At 14, you should not be hanging out with guys robbing a train.
00:28:24.000 Yes, I would say that's true.
00:28:27.000 You should not be doing a lot of things at 14. Yeah.
00:28:31.000 I stop and think about some shit that I did. 0.99
00:28:33.000 Absolutely. 1.00
00:28:33.000 Absolutely. 1.00
00:28:34.000 At 15, I shouldn't have found somebody on the floor dead.
00:28:38.000 I shouldn't have done a lot.
00:28:39.000 You know what I'm saying?
00:28:39.000 I handled a lot at that age.
00:28:41.000 I look at these kids and I go, that's 15?
00:28:43.000 Wow.
00:28:44.000 At that age, I had already mugged somebody or rolled a drunk.
00:28:47.000 I did something.
00:28:47.000 You know what I'm saying?
00:28:48.000 Something to look over... 1.00
00:28:49.000 And go, fuck, either I like this or I don't. 1.00
00:28:52.000 You know, a shark tastes blood, neither he likes it or he doesn't. 1.00
00:28:56.000 I remember hanging out on the street at night as like a 13-year-old.
00:29:00.000 13-year-old, my God.
00:29:01.000 I remember like, we'd just be out on the street in the summer.
00:29:04.000 We'd be playing in the street.
00:29:05.000 It'd be like midnight or something, you know?
00:29:07.000 We'd just be out.
00:29:08.000 Yeah.
00:29:08.000 No one does that now.
00:29:09.000 You can't do that.
00:29:10.000 No, God would pull you over.
00:29:16.000 We would just say like, hey, I'm going to spend the night at my friend's house.
00:29:20.000 And then my friend would say, yeah, we're going to spend the night at the other person's house. 0.99
00:29:22.000 The parents don't want to fucking talk. 0.97
00:29:24.000 They're like, cool, babysitter for the night. 1.00
00:29:25.000 We get to fuck out on the couch. 1.00
00:29:27.000 You guys are out in the woods, mosquito bites in your dick. 1.00
00:29:29.000 Right. 1.00
00:29:31.000 Remember mosquitoes, man?
00:29:33.000 We don't get that in LA. People don't realize how fucking cunty mosquitoes can be. 1.00
00:29:38.000 When you go out into the woods and they just swarm on your ass. 1.00
00:29:41.000 I got bit in the face when I was in Ohio from sitting outside right here. 0.99
00:29:44.000 Just recently?
00:29:45.000 Yeah.
00:29:45.000 And off don't work no more.
00:29:46.000 We talked about this shit. 1.00
00:29:47.000 Off, that shit's done. 1.00
00:29:49.000 They power through that shit. 1.00
00:29:50.000 Those mosquitoes, they drink that shit for mouthwash. 1.00
00:29:52.000 They got a hold of some Monsanto corn and now they're fucking super pumped up. 1.00
00:29:56.000 Dude, my dad was telling me about this bug that came from Japan, and that's then hit, I think, Canada, and then went to Michigan, and now it's coming down to Ohio, and what it's doing is, well, it's not bad for us, but it goes into these trees. 0.68
00:30:12.000 I forget the name of the tree that it's attacking, and it drills holes in it and lays eggs in it, and then when all the babies come out, they just pretty much destroy everything, so it's killing this whole breed of tree.
00:30:25.000 Is it a bark beetle?
00:30:26.000 No.
00:30:26.000 It's something I've never heard of.
00:30:28.000 And it's just destroying all this.
00:30:30.000 My dad has had these trees for 30 years in his backyard, these humongous trees.
00:30:34.000 They're all dead.
00:30:35.000 And he's like, dude, all the trees in the neighborhood are dead.
00:30:38.000 It's just attacking Ohio right now.
00:30:40.000 And when it was in Michigan before...
00:30:42.000 How did they stop it?
00:30:42.000 They can pre-treat a tree.
00:30:45.000 You could have these people come out to your tree and put this shit in it and they drill these holes in the tree and put this chemical in the tree that supposedly helps it. 0.99
00:30:52.000 But it didn't work for my dad. 0.99
00:30:55.000 He had all his trees treated.
00:30:58.000 And it's just destroying all these trees.
00:31:00.000 That's insane. 1.00
00:31:01.000 That's fucked, man. 1.00
00:31:03.000 Isn't it weird how like we now because of all the cross-pollination with ships and planes and we can introduce shit to a place where it has no natural predators. 1.00
00:31:13.000 Right. 0.99
00:31:14.000 And that the whole system just gets completely fucked. 0.98
00:31:17.000 I was on the, not even the highway, it was on like regular streets last night at about 10 o'clock. 0.99
00:31:25.000 And as I'm driving down the street, I saw this fucking coyote standing in the road, staring at me, and then he trots over to the sidewalk. 0.95
00:31:33.000 And then I slow down, and I look at him, and he's staring at me, and he looks left, he looks light, and then he runs up into someone's driveway. 0.99
00:31:39.000 And I'm looking at that coyote, and I'm like, that's reality.
00:31:43.000 That's nature. 0.99
00:31:44.000 That's something that doesn't know traffic lights, doesn't give a fuck about your laws, doesn't give a fuck about, you know, oh, that's your kid? 1.00
00:31:52.000 Oh, I won't fuck with your kid. 1.00
00:31:54.000 This is a crazy little monster running around eating cats, eating rabbits, killing things all around people's homes. 1.00
00:32:02.000 That's reality.
00:32:04.000 That thing's going to be here long after these buildings rot away and nuclear waste makes people evacuate, everything west of Pasadena.
00:32:13.000 Once that actually happens, when things like that actually happen, There's a gang of coyotes.
00:32:17.000 Coyotes will take over. 0.98
00:32:18.000 There's a gang of coyotes that live in Burbank, and I have this thing where I feel weird with coyotes because I don't feel like they're going to attack me at all, even though they might sometime, but I always roll down the window and fuck with coyotes. 0.92
00:32:28.000 Like, I'll whistle at them and be like, hey, you, come here! 0.72
00:32:30.000 You know, like, do you play with the coyotes when you see them?
00:32:33.000 You know, you think they're like dogs, but you ever see a picture of a coyote with their mouth open?
00:32:36.000 Yeah, it's scary. 1.00
00:32:37.000 It's fucking nuts, man. 1.00
00:32:38.000 They look like cartoon mouths. 1.00
00:32:41.000 Like, their mouths have so...
00:32:42.000 Like, pull up a picture of one.
00:32:44.000 Coyote, mouth open, big teeth, something Google. 1.00
00:32:47.000 Asshole. 1.00
00:32:49.000 Butthole asshole, whatever you want to put in. 1.00
00:32:53.000 The extra, like, extra teeth that they have are really fucking creepy. 1.00
00:33:00.000 Oh, Jesus. 1.00
00:33:02.000 Look at all his fucking teeth. 1.00
00:33:04.000 Look at that. 1.00
00:33:05.000 Look at his fucking teeth. 1.00
00:33:07.000 That's so scary. 1.00
00:33:11.000 It's really fucked up when you think about that young girl that got killed by coyotes. 0.98
00:33:15.000 It's so rare that that happens. 0.99
00:33:17.000 Little kids get bitten by them all the time, but usually little kids are near their parents. 0.55
00:33:21.000 Usually what happens is the dad comes over and beats the fuck out of the coyote, and the coyote lets go.
00:33:25.000 It's happened a few times in recent memory. 1.00
00:33:30.000 But fucking this chick was just walking through the woods, and a whole gang of them. 1.00
00:33:36.000 Circled her. 1.00
00:33:37.000 I just said we could take her. 0.99
00:33:38.000 I just jacked her. 1.00
00:33:40.000 Killed by coyotes. 0.95
00:33:41.000 Ooh, that's gruesome.
00:33:42.000 Yeah, the gang in my neighborhood just hangs out around my fence.
00:33:45.000 Like, my dog will come out and go to the bathroom.
00:33:49.000 And you can just hear, like, my dog start barking.
00:33:51.000 And then you see all these feet scattering around my fence.
00:33:54.000 Like, oh, these coyotes are going to try to attack my dog if they can. 1.00
00:33:58.000 Dude, knowing that coyotes can attack people like that, I say we kill all of them. 0.78
00:34:03.000 And people are like, no, the coyotes are our friends.
00:34:07.000 Do you know they killed a mountain lion in Santa Monica?
00:34:10.000 Do you know about that?
00:34:10.000 Yeah, I heard about that.
00:34:11.000 Where are you going, Joe Diaz?
00:34:14.000 Is coyote good at eating?
00:34:15.000 Like, can you eat a coyote?
00:34:16.000 Because what if we can make it some kind of coyote burger?
00:34:18.000 I bet you could eat it if you had to eat it. 1.00
00:34:20.000 I bet it would taste like shit. 1.00
00:34:21.000 I bet it would taste like hatred. 1.00
00:34:23.000 I bet coyote meat just tastes like rotten hatred.
00:34:28.000 Yeah, you're right.
00:34:31.000 Just coyote brain. 0.95
00:34:32.000 That's a crazy voice. 1.00
00:34:36.000 Cunty fucking animals coyotes are. 1.00
00:34:39.000 So they killed this mountain lion in Santa Monica. 1.00
00:34:42.000 In, like, where everybody is.
00:34:44.000 Santa Monica.
00:34:45.000 Populated area.
00:34:46.000 And it wasn't a homeless person. 1.00
00:34:47.000 No, it was a fucking mountain lion. 1.00
00:34:48.000 It was a real mountain lion. 1.00
00:34:49.000 Not a cougar. 1.00
00:34:50.000 Not a crazy old bitch. 1.00
00:34:52.000 And when they killed it, there was all these Facebook posts and one of them was my favorite. 0.99
00:34:57.000 It was so awesome.
00:34:59.000 There's this woman and she said, why are we...
00:35:02.000 It's only because of our ego that we think we are better than animals.
00:35:06.000 You know, animals have a soul.
00:35:09.000 And she like, you know, soul in all caps.
00:35:11.000 I would gladly take a bullet for an animal or a dog or a cat or a bear or a deer or...
00:35:18.000 Before I would for a person, exclamation point, exclamation point.
00:35:23.000 I mean, I was looking at this and I'm like, this is amazing.
00:35:26.000 This is a person that's actually saying, you shouldn't kill that monster that's roaming through the neighborhood.
00:35:32.000 The 150 pound cat.
00:35:35.000 No, you shouldn't kill that unpredictable beast. 1.00
00:35:38.000 And if you wanted to do that, I would gladly take that bullet. 1.00
00:35:42.000 I would sacrifice my life for this monster. 1.00
00:35:46.000 You sacrifice your life for one of the most horrific creations of nature. 0.99
00:35:50.000 A big cat. 0.98
00:35:53.000 A mean, thoughtless, killing machine. 0.80
00:35:59.000 You can't even roll a basketball in front of one of those things. 1.00
00:36:01.000 They fucking dive on it and bite it. 0.99
00:36:03.000 That's their instinct. 0.99
00:36:04.000 Yeah, but they could have also done that as a weapon.
00:36:07.000 Just like, hey, get away from me, cat.
00:36:08.000 Here, chase this ball.
00:36:10.000 We have all this money and all this technology.
00:36:12.000 They can put one of those bullets and put them to sleep and take them to the zoo.
00:36:14.000 Yeah.
00:36:15.000 And figure out what's going on.
00:36:16.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:36:16.000 They kill fucking everything. 1.00
00:36:18.000 I do think that they kill everything. 1.00
00:36:21.000 I understand a bear is a harmful animal or whatever, but something made that bear come down. 0.99
00:36:26.000 That bear don't want to fuck with nobody. 1.00
00:36:28.000 We don't want to fuck with him. 1.00
00:36:29.000 So either they're building somewhere they shouldn't be fucking building, or there's no food for the fucking bear. 1.00
00:36:34.000 It's most likely no food for the bear. 0.99
00:36:35.000 And it's also the problem with bears and people is that once they find out that they can go to garbage cans and get food, that's it.
00:36:42.000 They just go to garbage cans all the time. 0.99
00:36:43.000 Then they have to take them and put them in zoos and shit. 1.00
00:36:46.000 They become problems. 0.99
00:36:47.000 Listen, I understand.
00:36:48.000 You have to protect the community. 1.00
00:36:50.000 We can't have a bear or a fucking mountain lion. 1.00
00:36:52.000 Does anybody know what a mountain lion will do to a human being and how fast? 1.00
00:36:56.000 But at the same time, let's see if we can fucking mummify him first. 0.99
00:37:00.000 Take him to a museum. 1.00
00:37:02.000 Figure out what made this fucking happen. 1.00
00:37:03.000 Mummify him? 1.00
00:37:04.000 Whatever the fuck. 1.00
00:37:05.000 Shoot one of those darts in him. 1.00
00:37:06.000 Don't we have those darts? 0.99
00:37:07.000 You got something on your lip.
00:37:08.000 We have darts and lasers.
00:37:10.000 Darts and lasers? 0.99
00:37:11.000 Yeah, we have lasers and darts.
00:37:12.000 But I got to see a kid running on the 101 backwards and he gets shot.
00:37:16.000 Dart him! 1.00
00:37:17.000 What the fuck you got these darts for? 1.00
00:37:19.000 You got darts, officers. 1.00
00:37:20.000 Dart them.
00:37:21.000 Laser them. 0.54
00:37:21.000 You talk about them, you show them in a Chuck Norris movie. 0.54
00:37:24.000 Now you're on the 101 and you don't want to dart nobody.
00:37:26.000 You follow me?
00:37:27.000 We're a little bit too...
00:37:28.000 I think tasering people is dangerous.
00:37:31.000 People die. 1.00
00:37:32.000 We're a little bit too quick to pull a fucking trigger. 1.00
00:37:34.000 I love the fucking bearing arms and everything, but it's a bear. 1.00
00:37:39.000 Anybody who knows hunting or whatever, just sit still for two minutes and get the fuck out of there. 1.00
00:37:43.000 Get the fuck out of there. 1.00
00:37:44.000 You kick a garbage can, they're more scared of us. 1.00
00:37:47.000 Until we fucking corner them. 1.00
00:37:49.000 Me, sometimes. 1.00
00:37:50.000 I lived in fucking Aspen where they were everywhere. 0.99
00:37:52.000 Yeah, but you gotta be real careful if they have babies. 1.00
00:37:55.000 You gotta be real careful. 1.00
00:37:56.000 But I seen a lot of shit in Aspen. 1.00
00:37:58.000 I used to see schools of raccoons. 1.00
00:38:01.000 Schools of them crossing the street.
00:38:03.000 From the big one to the little tiny one at the end. 1.00
00:38:05.000 I know those motherfuckers are dangerous, but you can't hit them with a car. 1.00
00:38:08.000 Let them be. 1.00
00:38:09.000 I wish I saved a picture.
00:38:11.000 There's a picture that I saw once.
00:38:13.000 I don't remember if it was online or in a book or a magazine.
00:38:16.000 I wish I saved this picture because I haven't been able to find it in all my Google searches.
00:38:21.000 But it was a guy who was a photographer who was killed by a bear.
00:38:24.000 And he was taking pictures of a female and her cubs.
00:38:27.000 And the last image on his camera before he was killed by the bear is the bear with its teeth glared charging him. 0.99
00:38:34.000 And it's a fucking horrific picture. 0.99
00:38:37.000 They found it. 0.99
00:38:38.000 They found it on the dude's camera.
00:38:39.000 I bet that is.
00:38:40.000 I remember looking at it and thinking it's so powerful.
00:38:43.000 Yeah, it's crazy.
00:38:45.000 When they shot Jim Jones and the cameraman went down, remember the camera kept running as they were shooting everybody?
00:38:50.000 As they were getting on the plane from Guyana, that was live footage there on television. 0.99
00:38:54.000 What the fuck were you doing in Guyana? 0.99
00:38:55.000 You should have been taking pictures in San Francisco where you live. 1.00
00:38:58.000 That Jim Jones story is fascinating, man.
00:39:00.000 They shot him at the airport.
00:39:02.000 What was the dude's name?
00:39:03.000 Who played him in the movie?
00:39:06.000 Powers Booth. 1.00
00:39:06.000 Ooh, Powers Booth's a bad motherfucker. 1.00
00:39:09.000 He's a bad motherfucker. 1.00
00:39:10.000 They only use him for certain things. 1.00
00:39:11.000 Oh my god.
00:39:12.000 He comes out when you need a heavy southern gentleman throwing heat. 1.00
00:39:16.000 Powers Booth's a bad motherfucker. 1.00
00:39:18.000 Look at the screen here. 0.99
00:39:20.000 For some reason, the image isn't showing up, but it says the image captures a bear seconds before it's mauled to its photograph.
00:39:28.000 Oh, it's false?
00:39:29.000 I think you're thinking of a different picture, though.
00:39:33.000 They're thinking of one where a bear comes into a guy's tent.
00:39:38.000 I think that's a different image.
00:39:41.000 Okay.
00:39:42.000 What's up, Joe Rogan, baby?
00:39:44.000 Nothing, baby.
00:39:44.000 What's going on, man?
00:39:45.000 See if you can find it.
00:39:47.000 You're very excited about this weekend?
00:39:48.000 There is one fake one, though.
00:39:49.000 A fake one where they showed they photoshopped it.
00:39:51.000 I'm sorry, I cannot go with you. 0.99
00:39:52.000 This is a great fucking card this weekend. 0.99
00:39:54.000 It's a great card. 1.00
00:39:54.000 It's going to be sick. 1.00
00:39:55.000 There's some great cards coming up in the next few fucking weeks. 0.99
00:39:57.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:39:58.000 August, July.
00:39:59.000 Junior Dos Santos and Frank Mir is going to be nuts.
00:40:01.000 I was going to ask you, Joe.
00:40:02.000 Remember the Salvia guy that was the crazy MMA guy that was always talking about, not Salvia, but Stevia?
00:40:11.000 Oh, yeah, yeah.
00:40:12.000 I know that whole story.
00:40:13.000 Yeah, I don't know.
00:40:14.000 We probably shouldn't talk about it.
00:40:15.000 Oh, don't talk about it?
00:40:16.000 Yeah, don't give him any attention.
00:40:18.000 Yeah, that's weird.
00:40:19.000 Something's wrong with him.
00:40:20.000 So what do you think about this card, baby?
00:40:21.000 Let's break it down.
00:40:22.000 I'm very excited for you.
00:40:24.000 I'm sorry I can't go.
00:40:25.000 Yeah, I wish you could go.
00:40:26.000 It'd be fun.
00:40:27.000 I want to watch one with you guys.
00:40:28.000 We've got to go to a Strikeforce card.
00:40:30.000 Strikeforce.
00:40:30.000 Next time is a big Strikeforce fight.
00:40:32.000 Did you see the last one?
00:40:33.000 Did you see Josh Barnett and Daniel Cormier?
00:40:35.000 I haven't watched it yet.
00:40:36.000 What a fight.
00:40:37.000 Both guys broke their hands in the first round, too.
00:40:39.000 I heard Cormier look very good.
00:40:41.000 He's a beast. 1.00
00:40:41.000 He's a fucking beast. 1.00
00:40:42.000 Throwing kicks. 1.00
00:40:43.000 He launched Josh Barnett into the air, too.
00:40:45.000 Josh Barnett is a big boy.
00:40:47.000 He's a big boy.
00:40:47.000 Daniel Cormier hoisted him up and, whoa, boom!
00:40:50.000 Threw him for a ride, controlled him on top, smashed him, cut him up with elbows.
00:40:55.000 And he's only had, like, I think that was his fifth MMA fight.
00:40:58.000 I mean, it's amazing. 1.00
00:40:59.000 Daniel Cormier is a motherfucker. 1.00
00:41:00.000 How long has the babyface assassin been arrested? 1.00
00:41:03.000 He's been around forever.
00:41:04.000 He was one of the youngest UFC champs.
00:41:07.000 He won, I don't know how old he was when he won the title, but I remember he beat Randy Couture, and then there was some sort of a dispute with the UFC management, and UFC didn't get along, and he left, and then he started fighting overseas, and he fought in pride, and...
00:41:24.000 And then he came back and became part of the Strikeforce tournament.
00:41:30.000 He's been around forever.
00:41:32.000 That guy's fought everybody.
00:41:33.000 He's fought Minotaro.
00:41:35.000 He's fought Crow Cop twice. 1.00
00:41:37.000 He's fought a lot of fucking dudes. 0.96
00:41:39.000 I just thought his experience would really shine through, but from what I'm hearing... 1.00
00:41:43.000 Cormier's a motherfucker, man. 0.99
00:41:44.000 Well, you know, though, Josh Barnett broke his hand in the first round, and so did Cormier. 1.00
00:41:48.000 They both broke their hand in the first round.
00:41:50.000 So, you know, who knows how a rematch would go, but Cormier won that fight with his wrestling.
00:41:58.000 He won that fight with his striking. 0.99
00:42:00.000 I mean, he's just a motherfucker, dude, and he's not been doing it that long. 0.99
00:42:04.000 He's badass, man. 0.99
00:42:06.000 I'm real impressed.
00:42:07.000 He head kicked Josh Barnett twice.
00:42:10.000 Josh Barnett couldn't take him down.
00:42:12.000 No one's been able to take him down in a UFC match.
00:42:15.000 I mean, he's such a high-level wrestler. 0.99
00:42:17.000 It's going to take a fucking beast to take that guy down. 0.99
00:42:20.000 So you've got to stand with him. 0.99
00:42:22.000 And he's really quick, man.
00:42:23.000 And he's not a tall guy, but he's compact and explosive.
00:42:29.000 All the years of wrestling, the high-level wrestling, I think the mental toughness that those guys gain from being high school.
00:42:40.000 Competitive amateur wrestling.
00:42:41.000 Those are different animals, man.
00:42:43.000 Those are different animals.
00:42:44.000 Those guys are tough on a whole different level.
00:42:48.000 In my opinion, you look at the percentage, that might be the toughest group of human beings on Earth.
00:42:58.000 Just the toughest, mentally toughest, is amateur wrestlers.
00:43:02.000 It really might be. 1.00
00:43:03.000 They're fucking animals, man. 1.00
00:43:05.000 Some of the shit those guys go through and they do it dehydrated and malnourished. 1.00
00:43:09.000 And they're out there like fucking animals. 1.00
00:43:11.000 You know what's crazy, Joe? 1.00
00:43:12.000 You took me to the UFC in Jersey.
00:43:14.000 And here's all these MMA fighters in the audience in attendance. 0.99
00:43:17.000 But everybody kept looking at that Penn State fucking wrestling team. 0.99
00:43:21.000 And everybody kept looking at that coach. 1.00
00:43:24.000 More people went up to shake that motherfucker's hand. 1.00
00:43:27.000 I heard more people going, pssh, look who it is. 1.00
00:43:29.000 What's his name?
00:43:30.000 The coach of Penn State?
00:43:32.000 That's the best wrestler in the world?
00:43:34.000 Oh, Cale Sanderson?
00:43:35.000 Cale Sanderson was at the fight right in the row behind me.
00:43:38.000 He's wrestling again.
00:43:40.000 No.
00:43:40.000 I don't know if it's the same guy we're thinking about.
00:43:43.000 Who they say is the best white wrestler in the world. 0.63
00:43:46.000 Yeah, he's an amazing wrestler. 0.99
00:43:47.000 Not a fucking intriguing guy either. 0.92
00:43:49.000 Not something that you're like, oh, I'm not going to mess with him. 0.98
00:43:52.000 He was sitting behind us with the team.
00:43:55.000 And everybody who walked by had to say, oh my god, there's Chael Sanderson or Cale Sanderson, oh my god. 0.97
00:44:02.000 Like, everybody was fucking like in awe of this guy. 0.51
00:44:05.000 And that was when we threw the guy out, and then the guy that was with him said to me, Joey Karate, we got your back. 0.96
00:44:10.000 That's when it all went down, because the guy was yelling. 0.99
00:44:12.000 But everybody was looking at that guy like he was a fucking killer that day. 0.99
00:44:17.000 And I mean, from Fitch to Guida, everybody was there, standing there, you know, so... 0.99
00:44:22.000 Yeah, he's the coach of Penn State.
00:44:23.000 Yeah, that's Cale Sanderson.
00:44:25.000 Cale Sanderson. 0.91
00:44:26.000 Yeah, he's a beast. 0.97
00:44:26.000 It's crazy. 0.97
00:44:28.000 The people that he was wrestling with, teaching in college, they're the ones who encouraged him to compete again.
00:44:35.000 He still physically got it.
00:44:37.000 He just stopped competing.
00:44:38.000 I just think that high a level, like when you're at that high a level in any sport, whether it's wrestling or anything, you know, boxing, when you get to that level, it's so hard to maintain that kind of pace.
00:44:50.000 It's so hard to just live your life like that where you're constantly competing.
00:44:55.000 When I was a kid, I seen a high school wrestler. 1.00
00:44:57.000 By the way, your fucking voice is just creeping me out. 0.99
00:44:59.000 Was that you or him? 1.00
00:45:01.000 When I was a kid, I seen one of the best fights ever.
00:45:04.000 I seen a high school decorated wrestler fight this kid that was a scrappy fighter, everybody knew. 0.99
00:45:09.000 And dog, two minutes in, he got his hooks in this motherfucker. 1.00
00:45:13.000 It was in front of a VFW. You know how they always have an American flag with the pole and the little fence? 0.99
00:45:18.000 He picked him up and threw him over the fucking fence, dog. 1.00
00:45:21.000 Oh, no. 1.00
00:45:21.000 The strike, I didn't know. 1.00
00:45:22.000 He just landed on his head and just stood there like, what am I going to do?
00:45:25.000 Oh, my God. 1.00
00:45:26.000 I'm not going to get back up and fight this fucking monster. 1.00
00:45:28.000 Just pick him. 1.00
00:45:29.000 And that's when I was like, wrestlers got something.
00:45:31.000 They got that core strength.
00:45:32.000 They've been working it since they were young. 1.00
00:45:34.000 And some of these guys with the bent ears and shit, they ain't got no time to fuck around, man. 1.00
00:45:38.000 They'll take you the fuck down. 1.00
00:45:39.000 But it has made a difference in MMA that I've seen. 0.99
00:45:42.000 I don't know much about it.
00:45:43.000 I watched a little bit of Pride.
00:45:45.000 But in the UFC, you're seeing these wrestlers.
00:45:48.000 It makes a big impact.
00:45:49.000 Judo guys and wrestlers.
00:45:51.000 Those are the two toughest to deal with.
00:45:54.000 But the thing about, and both of them, especially when it comes to international competition, they both have to deal with some pretty fucking stiff and crazy competition.
00:46:03.000 Judo, internationally especially, is really popular.
00:46:07.000 It's a really popular sport in a lot of different countries.
00:46:09.000 But wrestling, there's something about wrestlers, man. 0.94
00:46:12.000 What they have to go through, their mind becomes capable of pulling shit off where other people wouldn't push hard enough. 0.90
00:46:19.000 They would back off before the wrestler does. 0.96
00:46:23.000 These guys are redlining, man.
00:46:25.000 They know how to redline their brain, their body.
00:46:28.000 Some of the most savage fighters of all time.
00:46:30.000 Dan Henderson.
00:46:31.000 Randy Couture.
00:46:32.000 Go through the lineup.
00:46:33.000 Matt Hughes.
00:46:34.000 Think about all the different guys that started off.
00:46:37.000 Kostchek.
00:46:38.000 All the different guys that started off.
00:46:39.000 Hendricks.
00:46:40.000 Yeah.
00:46:42.000 Rashad.
00:46:42.000 Rashad.
00:46:43.000 Yeah, absolutely.
00:46:44.000 John Fitch was a captain at Purdue.
00:46:47.000 The list is...
00:46:48.000 And it takes a while for their hands to catch up with everything else.
00:46:52.000 But some guys pick it right up.
00:46:53.000 Griffin.
00:46:54.000 What's his name?
00:46:55.000 Fabulous Phil.
00:46:56.000 The one who just fought Rashad before...
00:46:58.000 Oh, Phil Davis.
00:46:59.000 Phil Davis, I'm sorry.
00:47:00.000 Fabulous, whatever they call him.
00:47:02.000 Mr. Wonderful.
00:47:02.000 Mr. Wonderful.
00:47:03.000 It's just...
00:47:04.000 Even Eddie always said that.
00:47:06.000 You better get ready for these wrestlers and learn how to fight off your back. 0.99
00:47:09.000 Because these wrestlers are going to fucking take you down. 1.00
00:47:13.000 There's so many guys that become successful. 0.99
00:47:16.000 Have you ever gone to this Japanese cultural center in Hollywood?
00:47:18.000 No, what is it?
00:47:19.000 Close to Eddie's.
00:47:19.000 It's a couple blocks from the old legends, the one on Vermont, the one that just moved.
00:47:25.000 The cultural center, it's like where the Japanese go to practice judo in town.
00:47:30.000 And it's real dirt cheap.
00:47:31.000 It's hardwood floors.
00:47:32.000 It's all old school. 0.98
00:47:34.000 Some people go sign up one time and get the fuck out of there because it's very traditional. 0.93
00:47:39.000 And I think they only do two classes a week, but it's going on down there. 0.99
00:47:42.000 All these other things like Aikido and La Brea with the swords and shit.
00:47:46.000 I'm talking about down and they've been there since 1940 something.
00:47:50.000 Is there still an Aikido school in Hollywood?
00:47:54.000 No, they moved to Burbank.
00:47:55.000 And then they moved again.
00:47:56.000 I drive by on Magnolia and I see it.
00:47:58.000 Everything is in Burbank.
00:48:00.000 Any style that you want is in Burbank.
00:48:02.000 There's a lot of Burbank.
00:48:03.000 Martial arts.
00:48:03.000 I went to see Eddie's.
00:48:05.000 I went to Burbank last night.
00:48:06.000 Yeah.
00:48:07.000 I had to go outside.
00:48:07.000 I swung by Eddie's.
00:48:08.000 I counted six fucking karate schools. 0.99
00:48:11.000 Kickboxing. 0.99
00:48:13.000 Who's the other guy that we owe?
00:48:14.000 Fabulous.
00:48:15.000 Benny.
00:48:15.000 Benny the Jet has his school.
00:48:17.000 I mean, Burbank, they have the Martial Arts Hall of Fame.
00:48:20.000 Benny the Jets in Burbank now?
00:48:21.000 Benny the Jets in Burbank, man.
00:48:23.000 They got a new kickboxing school.
00:48:25.000 They got two Gracie Barras.
00:48:27.000 When I first moved here, man, I used to go to his place in Van Nuys.
00:48:32.000 He would have all these gangbangers that they would give free classes to and let them work out. 0.99
00:48:38.000 You'd be taking kickboxing classes with these fucking gangbangers, man. 0.98
00:48:43.000 Parts of it were kind of creepy and a lot of people were complaining about it because there was a few problems. 0.99
00:48:47.000 But I remember this one dude came in and he had a A tattoo on his back that looked like you drew it.
00:48:53.000 It was like Vatas or something like that. 1.00
00:48:57.000 Fuck the rest. 1.00
00:48:59.000 And he had it tattooed on his back. 1.00
00:49:01.000 I mean, it looked like you did or like anybody did.
00:49:04.000 Like I gave you a tattoo gun for the first time and said, just see what you can do.
00:49:10.000 And I was thinking, like, this is not a guy you want to punch in the face.
00:49:13.000 This is not a guy who has a lot to lose.
00:49:16.000 Like, you know, this is a...
00:49:18.000 I might want to just keep my hands up and stick a move. 0.99
00:49:22.000 Might want to just get in your car and get the fuck out of here and get involved. 0.92
00:49:26.000 Yeah, well, there was... 0.98
00:49:27.000 There was Benny the Jet, and I think he had family members that would also teach there too.
00:49:33.000 I forget the whole history of it, so I don't want to talk about it, but they would let a lot of gangbangers go there.
00:49:39.000 It was a big culture shock thing coming from New York and then moving here and then taking kickboxing with gangbangers. 1.00
00:49:48.000 Fuck that. 1.00
00:49:49.000 Remember that bug we were talking about earlier that is killing all these trees? 1.00
00:49:52.000 It's called an emerald ash borer.
00:49:54.000 And look at that.
00:49:55.000 It looks like a cricket at a disco.
00:49:57.000 I mean, it's scary looking.
00:49:59.000 It looks high-tech.
00:50:00.000 It looks like a robot cricket.
00:50:01.000 Yeah, it's like a Nissan GTR bug.
00:50:04.000 Look at that thing. 0.92
00:50:06.000 Ew.
00:50:07.000 And that thing does... 0.89
00:50:08.000 That's the thing that just goes into trees and fucking lays a bunch of eggs in trees that destroys the trees and then those things hatch and become more of these... 0.99
00:50:15.000 It's like a fucking army of tree killers. 1.00
00:50:17.000 That's so fucking nutty, man. 1.00
00:50:20.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:50:20.000 It's so weird when... 0.99
00:50:21.000 So what do we have to do? 0.99
00:50:22.000 Bring over, like, Komodo dragons and eat these fucking... 0.99
00:50:24.000 Doesn't that look like alien technology? 0.99
00:50:25.000 That looks like alien technology.
00:50:27.000 You know what's gonna happen? 0.98
00:50:29.000 What are you gonna fucking do with Komodo? 0.99
00:50:30.000 This has been going on for years. 0.99
00:50:31.000 We started with termites.
00:50:32.000 What do you expect?
00:50:33.000 Termites weren't from here?
00:50:34.000 Where are termites? 1.00
00:50:34.000 Whatever the fuck. 1.00
00:50:35.000 I'm just saying. 1.00
00:50:36.000 This started years ago with termites.
00:50:37.000 They eat trees.
00:50:38.000 They eat the roots. 1.00
00:50:39.000 This is something fucking new to you. 0.99
00:50:40.000 But it is new when you have an invasive species. 0.99
00:50:43.000 Oh, please.
00:50:44.000 They were bringing weed in through Miami. 1.00
00:50:47.000 What do you think was coming in those fucking bags? 1.00
00:50:49.000 What do you think was just weed, lice, and fucking bugs, and palmetto bugs, and snakes? 1.00
00:50:54.000 What do you think was coming in those fucking shipments? 1.00
00:50:56.000 You know, big nine-foot fucking cobra got in from some fucking Colombian jungle. 1.00
00:51:01.000 And they got dicks, and they look for ears, and they're all these fucking creatures. 1.00
00:51:05.000 It's 2013. You're going to have a new fucking creature every week. 1.00
00:51:08.000 And I'm about to smoke my little vapor, so get the fire. 0.99
00:51:10.000 I got a new match. 0.99
00:51:11.000 I got master motherfucking cushions. 0.99
00:51:14.000 You know what I'm saying? 1.00
00:51:14.000 I was smoking this shit on the plane. 1.00
00:51:16.000 Oh, it's tremendous. 1.00
00:51:17.000 You know what's so funny?
00:51:18.000 He was smoking on the plane next to an old lady. 0.98
00:51:20.000 Did we talk about this yesterday?
00:51:22.000 No.
00:51:22.000 And...
00:51:23.000 And I'm like, wow, that's crazy.
00:51:27.000 It's not against the law to do those things.
00:51:29.000 Vapor, if it was like an electronic cigarette, I guess.
00:51:32.000 But then he did it in a car when we were driving to Pittsburgh, and he just starts hitting it, and all the windows are up, and immediately I smelled weed.
00:51:40.000 And I'm like, if you did that on the plane, everybody smelled that.
00:51:43.000 It does smell like weed still.
00:51:45.000 Because on the plane, they have a suction thing, right?
00:51:47.000 Yeah.
00:51:47.000 Yeah, you had that suction thing.
00:51:49.000 If you blow it, then have a vacuum of air.
00:51:51.000 So when you blow it over your shoulder to the window...
00:51:54.000 That's too dangerous.
00:51:54.000 Oh, you got to do it to the left.
00:51:55.000 You got to do it to the left. 0.99
00:51:57.000 But I was smoking on two different flights, and nobody smells nothing because of the fucking vacuum. 0.98
00:52:01.000 There's a thing about pot smoke, man, that when you're smoking, it doesn't smell like anything. 0.98
00:52:06.000 It's the weirdest thing.
00:52:07.000 I know.
00:52:07.000 It's just like cigarettes.
00:52:08.000 Well, yeah.
00:52:09.000 Yeah, I bet it is.
00:52:10.000 You don't smell the smoke on your own body.
00:52:12.000 Well, that's a weird thing that they say about smells, that olfactory senses, they only detect changes.
00:52:19.000 So you can get used to a stinky town.
00:52:21.000 That's how people live if they live someplace.
00:52:23.000 By a paper mill or something like that.
00:52:25.000 Yeah, that could do it.
00:52:27.000 Or I think slaughterhouses, that's a real problem. 0.97
00:52:30.000 Cow poop. 0.96
00:52:31.000 Yeah, if you pass pastures and cows are shitting all over the place and it just stinks horribly. 1.00
00:52:37.000 They're fucked up. 1.00
00:52:38.000 They shit so much. 1.00
00:52:39.000 They just shit everywhere. 1.00
00:52:40.000 You drive by, it's just shit. 1.00
00:52:42.000 You're smelling shit. 1.00
00:52:44.000 Yeah, I go to my mom's house. 1.00
00:52:45.000 I have to go by a good half mile where the whole air is just shit smell. 0.99
00:52:50.000 It smells like a thousand poops. 0.99
00:52:52.000 That's nature telling you that this is dirty.
00:52:55.000 You don't want to eat anything anywhere near this.
00:52:57.000 That's like a big warning sign. 1.00
00:52:59.000 That's why shit smells terrible. 1.00
00:53:02.000 Right? 1.00
00:53:03.000 I don't fucking know. 0.99
00:53:05.000 I don't think you should smoke that thing on a plane. 0.98
00:53:09.000 I'm going to make you promise that you're not going to do that from now on.
00:53:12.000 And he got caught with it at an airport.
00:53:14.000 He did?
00:53:15.000 Burbank took it out, looked at it, they couldn't even figure it out. 1.00
00:53:17.000 Those fucking geniuses. 1.00
00:53:19.000 They brought a cop over and they gave it right back to me and I was puffing all the way to gate number three like a doctor. 1.00
00:53:26.000 So what did you say it was when they asked you what it was? 1.00
00:53:28.000 A fucking electric cigarette. 1.00
00:53:29.000 Oh. 1.00
00:53:30.000 Didn't even ask.
00:53:31.000 How's that one for you?
00:53:32.000 Didn't even ask.
00:53:33.000 They didn't even ask.
00:53:34.000 They just looked at it.
00:53:35.000 They wanted to know if it was like some sort of a Gene Simmons bomb from one of those movies.
00:53:38.000 Such a bad idea.
00:53:39.000 Remember that thing, the little robot thing? 0.99
00:53:40.000 When they put the bomb in his fucking mouth, give me the bonus, fuck the bonus, and they pull the thing and he's like, ah, I still got that on my thing just for that scene. 0.99
00:53:49.000 The movie's horrible, but that scene is fucking classic. 1.00
00:53:51.000 Listen, man. 0.98
00:53:52.000 How many movies did Gene Simmons do?
00:53:54.000 I know he played that and I seen him on an episode of Miami Vice one time.
00:53:58.000 That's it. 0.99
00:53:59.000 I've never seen him, but he's probably done a bunch of fucking movies. 0.98
00:54:03.000 He was on an episode of Miami Vice? 0.98
00:54:04.000 Yeah.
00:54:05.000 He played like a drug dealer or something. 1.00
00:54:07.000 Miami Vice changed the fucking game. 1.00
00:54:10.000 Dudes started wearing blazers and no socks. 1.00
00:54:12.000 They started wearing loafers with no socks.
00:54:15.000 Why?
00:54:16.000 Because that's what they wore on Miami Vice.
00:54:18.000 They wanted to be like you're in Miami.
00:54:20.000 Dudes started buying white cars. 1.00
00:54:21.000 Who the fuck bought a white car before 1980? 1.00
00:54:24.000 There's no white cars. 1.00
00:54:25.000 Get out of here with your stupid fucking white car. 1.00
00:54:28.000 How many white Corvettes did you see? 1.00
00:54:30.000 There's like 10 of them ever made.
00:54:33.000 White's only for like Honda Accords or something. 1.00
00:54:36.000 When they saw that white Testarossa, they were like, oh shit. 0.99
00:54:40.000 White wheels too? 0.99
00:54:41.000 Did you see Will Smith slap that dude?
00:54:43.000 Yeah.
00:54:44.000 That's crazy.
00:54:45.000 And then he lied. 0.65
00:54:45.000 He's like, try to kiss me in the mouth. 0.65
00:54:47.000 I'm like, hey, we can all see the video.
00:54:48.000 He didn't try to kiss you in the mouth.
00:54:50.000 Kissed his face a few times.
00:54:51.000 He might have been trying to kiss him, you know, in the mouth.
00:54:53.000 It might have been like some pulling.
00:54:55.000 Yeah, you're right.
00:54:55.000 I didn't think about that.
00:54:56.000 I don't like people touching me.
00:54:58.000 I don't like that either.
00:54:59.000 Will Smith could have bad slapped him.
00:55:00.000 You know, he did.
00:55:00.000 He barely touched him.
00:55:02.000 I mean, he just went like this to the guy's face.
00:55:04.000 Right.
00:55:04.000 And everybody's saying that it was like some assault.
00:55:06.000 Oh my God!
00:55:07.000 Get out of here. 0.99
00:55:08.000 It's like always at publicities, at events, at the longest show I think, somebody said something to fucking Burt Reynolds and Burt Reynolds pushed him. 0.98
00:55:17.000 Listen, he's 66 years old. 0.99
00:55:19.000 He was just trying to get publicity for the fucking movie. 1.00
00:55:22.000 You know what I'm saying? 1.00
00:55:23.000 Probably not either.
00:55:23.000 It's probably just ego.
00:55:25.000 The guy came over and said something and Burt Reynolds was like, did you see the original one?
00:55:29.000 The guy goes, no, Burt Reynolds smacked him.
00:55:32.000 Really?
00:55:32.000 Really?
00:55:33.000 Whoa.
00:55:34.000 Is that online?
00:55:34.000 Is that a video of that?
00:55:35.000 I don't fucking know. 0.98
00:55:36.000 Oh, you gotta see. 0.99
00:55:37.000 Burt Reynolds smacks guy. 1.00
00:55:39.000 Burt Reynolds smacked the fuck. 0.99
00:55:40.000 Burt Reynolds is one of those guys where I look at him and I kind of feel bad, you know, and I see, like, his face all stretched out. 1.00
00:55:45.000 Like, when I was a kid, I looked at Burt Reynolds and I'm like, that guy's the shit. 0.99
00:55:49.000 Like, I remember, like, Smokey and the Bandit. 0.99
00:55:51.000 He's always smiling.
00:55:52.000 That's what I would always think.
00:55:53.000 Like, this guy looks like he's always having a great time.
00:55:55.000 He did have a good time, so he married Lonnie Anderson. 1.00
00:55:57.000 That bitch shut him down and left him with pills and he was fucked. 1.00
00:56:00.000 Really? 1.00
00:56:01.000 But dog, you watch him even in the Longest Yard, the beginning of the Longest Yard. 1.00
00:56:05.000 He goes in, he beats the bitch. 1.00
00:56:08.000 Beats the bitch! 1.00
00:56:09.000 Watch the movie. 1.00
00:56:10.000 He gets in the car and what fucking song does he get on when he turns it on? 1.00
00:56:14.000 What? 1.00
00:56:14.000 Saturday Night Special. 1.00
00:56:16.000 Let it skin it.
00:56:17.000 Watch it. 1.00
00:56:18.000 He's so fucked. 1.00
00:56:19.000 He's got a velour jacket on. 1.00
00:56:21.000 With fucking patches on this thing. 0.99
00:56:23.000 He looks like the guy that played Superfly. 1.00
00:56:27.000 That's what he looks like in that movie.
00:56:29.000 He smacks her. 0.87
00:56:29.000 He's laying in bed. 0.87
00:56:30.000 She's giving him a hard time.
00:56:32.000 He smacks her. 1.00
00:56:33.000 He takes her fucking car. 1.00
00:56:35.000 Saturday Night Special drives. 1.00
00:56:36.000 He cuts off cops.
00:56:37.000 Takes it to the ocean and dumps it into the ocean and goes to the bar.
00:56:41.000 And they come get him at the bar. 0.99
00:56:43.000 And they start fucking around. 0.99
00:56:44.000 He beats the one cop up. 0.99
00:56:46.000 And they take him to the... 1.00
00:56:47.000 But Reynolds was the shit. 1.00
00:56:48.000 Here's the video, I think. 1.00
00:56:50.000 Burton Reynolds apparently got a little slap happy last night, hitting a CBS producer at a movie premiere in Chelsea.
00:56:57.000 And we're the only ones with the video.
00:56:59.000 CBS News, Michael Pomerantz here now with the Blow by Blow.
00:57:02.000 Michael?
00:57:03.000 Maurice Reynolds attending the premiere of his new film, really a remake of his old film, When either in jest or in anger, depending on who you believe, Reynolds slapped the CBS employee who was asking the star about that movie.
00:57:15.000 And today CBS News says it is looking into the matter.
00:57:18.000 You judge for yourself.
00:57:19.000 Tell us a little about the movie.
00:57:22.000 Well, you don't know anything about the movie?
00:57:25.000 I know what's up with the audio Let me tell you something, my friend.
00:57:54.000 These guys, none of these little producers, nobody knows the smack.
00:57:57.000 Like the dude who got smacked on 2020 by the wrestler.
00:58:01.000 Oh, yeah.
00:58:01.000 That was a smack.
00:58:02.000 Oh, yeah.
00:58:02.000 Will Smith's a punk with that little backhand he gave the dude.
00:58:05.000 That wrestler, when he fucking smacked, what's his name, Tom Slossel? 0.96
00:58:09.000 Something like that. 0.99
00:58:09.000 John Stossel. 0.99
00:58:10.000 John Stossel.
00:58:11.000 Yeah.
00:58:11.000 He smacked him.
00:58:12.000 That boy got up.
00:58:13.000 He ruptured his eardrum. 0.99
00:58:14.000 Yeah, he fucking smacked him with a hand bigger than mine. 0.99
00:58:17.000 That was a smack. 1.00
00:58:19.000 Fucking Will Smith giving this guy a fucking love time. 0.99
00:58:22.000 All Will Smith did was gently touch the guy with his fingers on his face. 1.00
00:58:26.000 Anybody who calls what Will Smith did a slap, he gently did this to the guy's face.
00:58:31.000 It was like so...
00:58:32.000 It was so non-aggressive. 0.99
00:58:34.000 Yeah, this guy's a fucking huge dude, too. 0.99
00:58:41.000 That's terrific. 0.99
00:58:41.000 Wait, is that all you got? 0.99
00:58:43.000 I'll ask you the standard question.
00:58:44.000 You know?
00:58:45.000 Standard question.
00:58:46.000 I think this is fake.
00:58:47.000 You think it's fake?
00:58:48.000 There you go.
00:58:49.000 What's that?
00:58:50.000 Is that fake?
00:58:51.000 Huh? 0.99
00:58:51.000 What the hell's wrong with you? 0.99
00:58:52.000 That's open-hand slap, huh? 0.99
00:58:54.000 You think it's fake? 1.00
00:58:55.000 Damn. 1.00
00:58:57.000 Huh? 1.00
00:58:57.000 What do you mean? 1.00
00:58:58.000 Hey! 0.99
00:59:01.000 That's fucking real, guys. 0.99
00:59:03.000 That dude cuffed him. 0.99
00:59:04.000 That's fucking real right there. 0.99
00:59:05.000 That dude cuffed him. 0.99
00:59:06.000 That's a guy not getting paid enough to do his job.
00:59:09.000 Well, you know, it's also, the way he said it was very arrogant, like he was going to be safe.
00:59:13.000 I think it's fake.
00:59:14.000 You know, it's not...
00:59:15.000 You know, saying it's fake, duh.
00:59:18.000 Duh. 1.00
00:59:19.000 Fucking duh. 1.00
00:59:20.000 Everyone knows it's fake. 0.99
00:59:21.000 You know, it's obviously planned out in advance. 1.00
00:59:24.000 But to say it's not a tough job, you're crazy. 0.95
00:59:27.000 Those guys are always busted up.
00:59:28.000 Do you remember when they did the expose on wrestling?
00:59:30.000 Do you remember when they did the expose on wrestling on 2020 and they showed us all the tricks?
00:59:36.000 How they would take the razor blade and cut your forehead.
00:59:38.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 0.99
00:59:38.000 And make it bleed. 0.99
00:59:40.000 That was a great expose. 1.00
00:59:41.000 A lot of people didn't know about that shit. 1.00
00:59:43.000 Imagine they did that. 1.00
00:59:44.000 They used to cut their own head.
00:59:45.000 Their own head.
00:59:46.000 And I knew about it because one of the training schools in New Jersey.
00:59:49.000 So when I was going to grammar school, one of the teachers kept telling me, if you're good guys, we'll take you to the wrestling.
00:59:53.000 I know, Chief J. Strombo, whatever. 0.99
00:59:55.000 It's all fake and shit. 0.99
00:59:57.000 When I found out wrestling was fake in the fourth grade, I was pissed for about ten minutes. 0.99
01:00:00.000 I went to El Tapatio the other day, and they had the Mexican wrestling on. 0.99
01:00:04.000 Those dudes have some fucking dope moves, man. 1.00
01:00:08.000 How about the outfits? 0.99
01:00:09.000 Oh, the outfits are outstanding.
01:00:10.000 They have dudes with, like, long Conan hair.
01:00:12.000 No one looks like they've ever even heard of steroids.
01:00:15.000 It's so weird because steroids are legal in Mexico, and these dudes are, like, regular-looking dudes.
01:00:20.000 But they had some crazy moves. 0.89
01:00:22.000 I was, like, really impressed, like, jumping through the air, wrapping their legs around the dude's neck, and flipping the dude through the air. 0.99
01:00:29.000 Like, they did some nutty shit. 0.98
01:00:30.000 I was like, wow, that is acrobatic. 1.00
01:00:32.000 If you can't appreciate that, I mean, obviously, it is theater.
01:00:36.000 But there's a physicality to it that, you know, it's very disrespectful to call it fake.
01:00:41.000 It's not fake.
01:00:42.000 Especially in that little attitude he did, that little sass he did. 0.93
01:00:45.000 Yeah, he said it to a guy without any fear of his own safety, being protected, he thought, by a camera and reality. 0.99
01:00:55.000 The media wasn't shit then, my friend. 0.98
01:00:56.000 The media wasn't what it was today. 1.00
01:00:58.000 The media wasn't shit. 1.00
01:00:59.000 They were just somebody who was taking up your fucking ass. 1.00
01:01:01.000 He just didn't have to be cunty about it. 1.00
01:01:03.000 If he communicated with the guy and asked him, are there predetermined outcomes?
01:01:09.000 That's what he should have said.
01:01:11.000 Instead of saying the way he did it, I'll ask you the standard question, is it fake?
01:01:16.000 It looks fake to me.
01:01:17.000 You know, like, wow.
01:01:19.000 You're like pawing at a lion.
01:01:22.000 Like, look at the size of that guy.
01:01:24.000 You don't feel uncomfortable with that? 0.99
01:01:27.000 This guy's all sweaty and hyped up from a fucking wrestling match where they always get kneed in the head and fucking kicked in the head accidentally and punched in the head. 0.99
01:01:34.000 Like, you see some of the shit they do where they do, like, flying sidekicks and hit each other in the head? 1.00
01:01:39.000 They hit each other in the fucking head, man. 1.00
01:01:41.000 There's a lot of times they're actually hitting each other. 1.00
01:01:43.000 It's not pretty...
01:01:44.000 Even if it's...
01:01:46.000 It's not precise.
01:01:47.000 It's not pretty.
01:01:48.000 Hard way to make a living, man.
01:01:50.000 What's funny, when I went to Miami at the end of April, that week was also WrestleMania.
01:01:55.000 So all these old-timers are in Miami. 0.99
01:01:58.000 So every radio show I went to do that week had an old-time wrestler.
01:02:01.000 I was talking about it.
01:02:02.000 And it was very interesting to see that, believe it or not, these guys still have followings.
01:02:08.000 Oh, I believe it.
01:02:09.000 They still have followings.
01:02:10.000 They do all those things that they show you in The Wrestler where people come and sign t-shirts and talk about 1981. I wonder where Jimmy the Superfly Snooker is.
01:02:19.000 Do you remember the ultimate warrior who used to live in Boulder in his heyday?
01:02:24.000 Did he? 0.99
01:02:24.000 He was up in Boulder shooting fucking banana juice. 0.99
01:02:27.000 Snapping Slim Jims. 1.00
01:02:29.000 This motherfucker. 1.00
01:02:30.000 Shooting banana juice. 1.00
01:02:31.000 I remember one time seeing him at the puddle car wash.
01:02:34.000 At that time, nobody had a 7 BMW. In the early 80s.
01:02:38.000 I don't even think they made him, but he had him.
01:02:40.000 Just because he had a fit in one. 0.99
01:02:42.000 And I'll never forget, it was off-season or something, and he got out of that fucking car, Joe. 0.99
01:02:46.000 And he had a vein that was a cord. 0.99
01:02:48.000 I don't have to lie to nobody. 1.00
01:02:50.000 Go look at fucking the Ultimate Warrior. 0.99
01:02:52.000 He's a giant dude. 0.99
01:02:53.000 But his veins, his biceps, were some of the biggest, most.
01:02:57.000 That was a bicep.
01:02:58.000 But he had a vein out here that lifted three-quarters of an inch from his arm.
01:03:03.000 I seen it.
01:03:03.000 I looked at it, stared at it, and was like, let me see how far.
01:03:07.000 His vein and his bicep went up three-quarters of an inch off the skin.
01:03:11.000 Yeah, there's a lot of people who don't realize how big those guys are.
01:03:13.000 Let me see if you get an Ultimate Warrior shot for me.
01:03:16.000 I saw Hulk Hogan the first time when I was in Hollywood.
01:03:19.000 It was right outside of...
01:03:20.000 Before I met him, I met him at UFC, and I had the honor of interviewing him once.
01:03:26.000 It was fun because I got to get excited about pro wrestling with him and pump it up. 0.98
01:03:33.000 He's fucking great, man. 0.99
01:03:34.000 He's great. 1.00
01:03:35.000 That guy's got a lot of pain, though.
01:03:37.000 I mean, he's gone through...
01:03:38.000 You ever see all the operations that guy's gotten through? 0.99
01:03:40.000 Holy shit. 0.99
01:03:42.000 That's the ultimate warrior? 1.00
01:03:44.000 And how tall is that dude? 0.99
01:03:46.000 He's like 6'3 or some shit? 1.00
01:03:50.000 Don't focus on his dick, Brian. 1.00
01:03:51.000 I was looking at his own shirt. 1.00
01:03:53.000 He's busting through his own shirt, but in a heart. 0.99
01:03:55.000 This guy's crazy, though. 0.92
01:03:56.000 Why does he have a heart? 0.99
01:03:59.000 I think it's just Europe.
01:04:01.000 He's got a lot of colors on him.
01:04:03.000 Is this Richard Simmons?
01:04:04.000 Look at his face.
01:04:05.000 This is Richard Simmons.
01:04:06.000 Isn't it crazy that they decide to paint their face up?
01:04:09.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:04:09.000 And the outfit with the suspenders, whatever the fuck they had. 1.00
01:04:12.000 Look at his arms. 0.99
01:04:13.000 This guy was pretty yoked.
01:04:14.000 Him and the Barbarian Brothers I remember seeing when I was a kid.
01:04:17.000 Those two guys, they were in the Flamingo kit.
01:04:19.000 I don't know what happened to those guys.
01:04:21.000 Isn't face paint, like, war paint a strange thing?
01:04:23.000 The idea that...
01:04:25.000 You know, you're gonna doll your face up to make yourself look meaner when you go to battle?
01:04:31.000 Like, that's gonna matter. 1.00
01:04:32.000 The ritual of rubbing shit on your face and put your war mask on before you go into battle. 1.00
01:04:39.000 Where the fuck did that ever come from? 1.00
01:04:42.000 Does it make someone extra scary if they got black stuff all over their face? 0.99
01:04:45.000 But are you talking about in the street? 0.92
01:04:47.000 No, like Indians. 1.00
01:04:48.000 American Indians.
01:04:49.000 And I'm talking about, you know, different people that have put war paint on over the years.
01:04:54.000 Well, the war paint for the American Indians symbolized something.
01:04:56.000 Remember Braveheart? 1.00
01:04:57.000 He put, like, fucking shit all over his face. 1.00
01:04:59.000 Yeah, it symbolized something. 1.00
01:04:59.000 But, like, if you're in the Green Beret, you got to go take and paint your face green. 1.00
01:05:04.000 That's different.
01:05:05.000 You know, it's a different thing.
01:05:06.000 But still, it must put you there.
01:05:08.000 Yeah, the ritual, right? 0.99
01:05:10.000 Must let you know that it's time to fucking rock. 0.99
01:05:12.000 It's time to get crazy. 0.99
01:05:13.000 It's got to get you.
01:05:14.000 That's how you probably get fired up by putting the makeup on though.
01:05:17.000 Do you guys remember this?
01:05:21.000 So, what do you want to do?
01:05:23.000 I don't know.
01:05:23.000 What do you want to do?
01:05:27.000 You boys a bit bored?
01:05:30.000 Snap me to it!
01:05:32.000 For those that didn't watch this but rather listen to this podcast that might be one of the most retarded things I've ever seen in my life. 1.00
01:05:56.000 It's a big, giant, roided-up dude handing out Slim Jims.
01:06:01.000 Is he still alive?
01:06:02.000 Is that guy still alive? 1.00
01:06:03.000 That's Deca de Roblin like a motherfucker. 1.00
01:06:05.000 Is he still alive? 0.99
01:06:06.000 Before they figured out the test?
01:06:08.000 Yeah.
01:06:09.000 Wow.
01:06:10.000 I wonder what he looks like now.
01:06:10.000 Let's find out.
01:06:13.000 I just typed in Slim Jim. 0.99
01:06:14.000 That guy's fucking huge. 0.99
01:06:16.000 What a strange ad. 1.00
01:06:17.000 What is it supposed to be?
01:06:18.000 Snap into a Slim Jim, and why are you so angry, sir?
01:06:21.000 What's going on here? 0.99
01:06:22.000 You're fucking going nutty, screaming and flexing. 1.00
01:06:25.000 Snap into a Slim Jim. 1.00
01:06:28.000 Kid bites into it, he flies out of his shoes. 0.99
01:06:30.000 Like, what the fuck kind of physics are we dealing with here? 0.99
01:06:36.000 Who greenlit that commercial? 0.80
01:06:38.000 I think The Ultimate Warrior has a blog now.
01:06:40.000 Oh, he does?
01:06:41.000 Yeah.
01:06:42.000 How fun would it be just to start shooting steroids and not stop?
01:06:45.000 Just get crazy and go Hulk style?
01:06:47.000 Just one day go, you know what? 1.00
01:06:49.000 I'm going to start fucking eating them and I'm not even doing cycles. 0.99
01:06:52.000 Well, I think if you look at those guys who have done that, it is possible to stay alive. 0.99
01:06:56.000 Look at the guys who were big-time professional bodybuilders.
01:07:01.000 They're still out there. 0.99
01:07:04.000 They get off the shit and their body shrinks down to normal size. 1.00
01:07:07.000 I want to know what Tom Platts' legs looked like today. 1.00
01:07:10.000 That's what you've got to find.
01:07:10.000 That's what we've got to find.
01:07:11.000 That's a good question.
01:07:12.000 I want to know what Tom Platt looks like today.
01:07:14.000 I want to know.
01:07:14.000 I mean, we all know what Arnold looked like.
01:07:16.000 Listen, bro, the first time you seen...
01:07:18.000 What was the movie, Pumping Iron?
01:07:20.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:07:20.000 Arnold was the shit. 1.00
01:07:21.000 You could say whatever the fuck. 1.00
01:07:22.000 Arnold, Franco, Colombo, that little fucking Italian with that back from here to here from fucking laying brick and blocking all his life. 1.00
01:07:29.000 He's like, I'd get a big block. 1.00
01:07:30.000 Get the fuck out of your whole family tree laid fucking 12-inch block. 1.00
01:07:34.000 He probably built everything in fucking Italy. 1.00
01:07:36.000 Look at you, you little fuck. 1.00
01:07:38.000 He was... 1.00
01:07:38.000 He was yoked. 1.00
01:07:39.000 He was a strong dude.
01:07:41.000 Isn't it funny that you said Tom Platt?
01:07:44.000 And we both know that that guy was associated with having giant legs.
01:07:47.000 It's like he's synonymous.
01:07:49.000 Isn't that incredible, though?
01:07:50.000 There's no other guy that has that synonymous with one body part.
01:07:54.000 Muscles and striations.
01:07:56.000 Legs.
01:07:56.000 His legs were giant.
01:07:58.000 Earl Campbell had big legs, but...
01:08:02.000 Tom Platt's had just ripped.
01:08:05.000 I'm sorry.
01:08:05.000 They were giant.
01:08:07.000 Can you find a picture of Tom Platt's legs just to show Tom Platt's.
01:08:12.000 P-L-A-T-Z. He was like 1980 if you can because that's when he was a king.
01:08:16.000 His upper body was big.
01:08:18.000 I mean, he was a huge guy, but nothing like his legs. 0.99
01:08:20.000 His legs were ridiculous. 1.00
01:08:21.000 What the fuck were they shooting in their legs in those days? 1.00
01:08:24.000 Look at that. 1.00
01:08:25.000 Look at his jaw.
01:08:26.000 Look at his legs. 1.00
01:08:26.000 Look at his fucking jaw. 1.00
01:08:28.000 His jaw is juice. 1.00
01:08:30.000 He's got muscle in his jaw. 1.00
01:08:31.000 That guy would crack a fucking Ari penis. 1.00
01:08:34.000 Look at him. 1.00
01:08:34.000 Look at his legs. 1.00
01:08:35.000 This is 1980. Look at his cheeks.
01:08:39.000 Back up again.
01:08:40.000 Oh my god.
01:08:41.000 Look at his legs are the freakiest thing though.
01:08:44.000 Look how much they stand out from the rest of his body. 0.53
01:08:46.000 That's insane.
01:08:48.000 It's like somebody opened up his legs and stuck a whole basketball in there.
01:08:52.000 He's got a basketball in each leg. 0.99
01:08:54.000 Look at the fucking size of those things. 1.00
01:08:56.000 They're crazy. 1.00
01:08:57.000 That is the craziest shit I've ever seen in my life. 1.00
01:09:00.000 Ever, ever. 1.00
01:09:00.000 That's a waste. 1.00
01:09:01.000 He has a waste for each thigh. 0.98
01:09:03.000 That's insane. 1.00
01:09:05.000 Look at the veins going through the fucking leg. 1.00
01:09:07.000 What the fuck are they shooting? 1.00
01:09:08.000 And he has no balls whatsoever. 1.00
01:09:10.000 No, no. 1.00
01:09:11.000 They fucking went into his legs. 1.00
01:09:12.000 Yeah, when you look, when they get to like this size, they're so juiced to the gills, their balls are shut down. 1.00
01:09:19.000 They just tapped. 0.99
01:09:20.000 Their balls are shut. 1.00
01:09:21.000 Look at the size of him. 1.00
01:09:23.000 My God, he was enormous!
01:09:26.000 I gotta find what he looks like today.
01:09:28.000 Jesus Christ.
01:09:29.000 Hi, guys. 1.00
01:09:30.000 Look at the fucking signs of his legs. 0.99
01:09:33.000 That's insane. 1.00
01:09:34.000 You ever see anything like that?
01:09:36.000 Oh, my God.
01:09:36.000 That's like from another animal.
01:09:38.000 It's like he took some meat off of a horse and put it onto his body.
01:09:41.000 I remember he used to try to sell leg workouts.
01:09:43.000 You're like, Tom, stop it.
01:09:44.000 No one wants to have legs like yours. 0.75
01:09:45.000 No, Tom.
01:09:46.000 That's number one. 1.00
01:09:47.000 Number two was no fucking running up hills like that shit. 1.00
01:09:50.000 Not only that, it's also a genetic issue. 1.00
01:09:53.000 He must have crazy genetics. 0.89
01:09:55.000 That's what it looks like. 1.00
01:09:56.000 That's what his balls look like. 0.99
01:09:59.000 See if we can find the picture. 0.99
01:10:02.000 Look at Robbie Robinson.
01:10:03.000 Look at the black guy. 1.00
01:10:04.000 Oh my god! 1.00
01:10:06.000 Jesus fucking Christ! 1.00
01:10:07.000 Look at Robbie Robinson! 1.00
01:10:08.000 Oh my god!
01:10:09.000 Jesus Christ!
01:10:10.000 Oh my god!
01:10:14.000 God, look at this.
01:10:15.000 There's a photo.
01:10:16.000 We're looking at a photo of his back, ladies and gentlemen, and it doesn't even look possible.
01:10:21.000 It doesn't look possible.
01:10:22.000 It looks like if you were going to do a cartoon on what a bodybuilder would look like.
01:10:28.000 Like if you were drawing it for South Park or something.
01:10:32.000 It can't even be real.
01:10:36.000 Blarf. 0.98
01:10:37.000 Isn't it crazy, though, that that's what happens when you do shit like try to have competitions where you see who has the best body and the biggest muscles? 0.99
01:10:45.000 Like, standards sort of change, and then, just like fake tits, the standard becomes the unnatural, unachievable, without drugs look. 1.00
01:10:53.000 But what's crazy about this, Joe, is I thought that Weightlifting and steroids and recovery and everything has excelled so much in 30 years.
01:11:02.000 That had to be 1982 when Tom Plants took that picture.
01:11:05.000 Right. 0.98
01:11:05.000 That's 30 fucking years ago. 0.98
01:11:07.000 You know what? 0.99
01:11:08.000 Oh, look at that picture.
01:11:10.000 He looks great.
01:11:11.000 He's got no pants on and he's flexing his legs.
01:11:15.000 That's cartoon legs, man.
01:11:16.000 That is cartoon legs.
01:11:17.000 It's so cartoonish.
01:11:19.000 It's crazy.
01:11:20.000 This is crazy.
01:11:21.000 He has extra muscles in his legs.
01:11:24.000 I mean, and he became famous for it, too.
01:11:27.000 So that became, like, you know, the thing he concentrated on.
01:11:30.000 If you keep hearing that sucking in the background, that's Joey Diaz.
01:11:33.000 He's using some device.
01:11:36.000 He's using it right into the microphone. 0.99
01:11:38.000 Eureka vaping like a motherfucking Joe Rogan. 0.98
01:11:42.000 That's amazing, that Tom Plotz guy. 0.99
01:11:44.000 That's amazing.
01:11:45.000 That's shocking.
01:11:46.000 It's amazing what a person can do.
01:11:49.000 The way you can change your body.
01:11:51.000 Just sticking some stuff in there and do a fuckload of squats. 0.83
01:11:55.000 Yeah, brother.
01:11:57.000 What are you doing, Joey Dears?
01:11:58.000 You tweeting?
01:11:59.000 No, no, no.
01:12:00.000 Answering text messages?
01:12:01.000 My wife.
01:12:03.000 My wife.
01:12:08.000 Brian, do you think you would ever be willing to get on a bodybuilding program and do roids for a TV show?
01:12:14.000 No, but I'm supposed to Saturday go to Richard Simmons and do his class.
01:12:20.000 His class?
01:12:20.000 I'm doing it just because I think it'll be funny.
01:12:23.000 Oh, it'll be amazing.
01:12:24.000 Where are you going to do his class?
01:12:25.000 I think it's in Santa Monica. 0.99
01:12:27.000 Shit, I want to do his class. 0.99
01:12:28.000 Do you want to? 1.00
01:12:29.000 I want to.
01:12:29.000 I have to do the UFC though.
01:12:31.000 What class is that?
01:12:32.000 Saturday is the UFC. It's like sweating to the 2000s or something.
01:12:36.000 How often is he there?
01:12:38.000 I think he does it like every week.
01:12:39.000 Really?
01:12:40.000 Yeah.
01:12:40.000 He teaches it.
01:12:41.000 Richard Simmons. 1.00
01:12:42.000 Do you fucking work out with Richard Simmons and all these really old ladies and gay guys? 1.00
01:12:46.000 We're going to make it happen. 0.99
01:12:47.000 Let's work out with Richard Simmons.
01:12:49.000 I am.
01:12:49.000 I mean, look.
01:12:50.000 Either way, you'd be amazed.
01:12:52.000 It's a good workout.
01:12:53.000 Oh, yeah.
01:12:53.000 If you tried to do sweating to the oldies and you actually kept...
01:12:55.000 It's like a nice little workout.
01:12:56.000 Yeah.
01:12:57.000 You know?
01:12:57.000 When I left the Y today...
01:12:59.000 I think if I get really baked, it's going to be the best thing I've ever done.
01:13:02.000 How much do you think it'll cost?
01:13:03.000 I think it's like 60 bucks.
01:13:04.000 Hmm, that's worth it.
01:13:05.000 When I left the Y today, they were doing, what's the Country Line thing?
01:13:09.000 Country Line?
01:13:10.000 Country Line Aerobics. 1.00
01:13:12.000 Bunch of fucking big rednecks in there fucking doing it. 1.00
01:13:14.000 Doing aerobics? 1.00
01:13:15.000 Like country line dancing mixed with aerobics. 0.99
01:13:18.000 It's like fucking Zumba for country people. 0.99
01:13:20.000 So line dancing. 1.00
01:13:21.000 Line dancing mixed with aerobics.
01:13:23.000 It's amazing what people do for jump up and down.
01:13:25.000 I tell you what, I'm really digging that Mike Dolce book, bro.
01:13:28.000 Yeah?
01:13:29.000 Are you really? 0.84
01:13:29.000 I'm really, I love, I never, I always said to myself, why do people go to Rwadi on a fucking treadmill where you can walk around North Hollywood Park and get some vitamin D and really sweat? 0.84
01:13:40.000 Then I read his book and like I told you on the plane, the diet stuff is hard for me because I don't like a lot of vegetables. 0.93
01:13:45.000 But the fucking workouts, you know, the beginner treadmill workout is sensational. 0.97
01:13:50.000 I can't do the full speed yet, but I'm doing it. 0.99
01:13:53.000 You know, I'm doing it.
01:13:54.000 He's coming on the podcast soon.
01:13:56.000 Yeah, please.
01:13:57.000 I think it's going to be the weekend for the UFC. He's great, man.
01:13:58.000 He's fucking great. 0.99
01:13:59.000 He really is. 0.99
01:14:00.000 That book has really helped me a lot.
01:14:01.000 I'm understanding. 0.90
01:14:03.000 I can't do a lot of shit because of my knee, but he's got great... 0.98
01:14:06.000 Basic exercises. 0.99
01:14:07.000 When I was really skinny, that's how I got size, by doing those strength things.
01:14:12.000 So I know where he's coming from.
01:14:13.000 I mean, in his book, he talks about how he went up in a bunch of weight, then he lost it just to prove his point, that strength.
01:14:20.000 So I understand what he's saying.
01:14:21.000 So I really enjoy the one book.
01:14:23.000 I have the one.
01:14:24.000 I'm going to get the other one.
01:14:25.000 I couldn't find it.
01:14:25.000 You order all three of them in the t-shirt, and it's not a bad deal.
01:14:29.000 I just couldn't find that particular thing, so I ordered it on Amazon.
01:14:33.000 I think he's actually doing the podcast next week. 0.97
01:14:36.000 Yeah, he's fucking great. 0.91
01:14:37.000 I think he's going to do it. 0.98
01:14:38.000 Please, people have questions for him and shit, because his book is really helping me a lot of things. 0.51
01:14:43.000 We got a lot of podcasts next week, dude. 0.90
01:14:45.000 We got Dolce, we got Bass Nectar, I gotta get back with that dude, and we got Bobcat Goldthwait, and we got Shane Smith.
01:14:54.000 Dude, we're becoming like a television show. 0.99
01:14:56.000 Hopefully we don't run out of shit to talk about. 0.99
01:14:58.000 I'll tell you what, man. 0.99
01:14:59.000 I went to Adam Carolla's place yesterday, and first of all, we need more employees.
01:15:04.000 Because he has 10. Right.
01:15:06.000 And second of all, I got mad podcast studio envy. 0.99
01:15:09.000 His fucking setup is so sweet. 1.00
01:15:12.000 Adam Carolla's a savage. 1.00
01:15:13.000 He builds his own shit. 1.00
01:15:14.000 He built his own broadcast desk. 1.00
01:15:16.000 He's a man-man.
01:15:17.000 He's a man-man. 1.00
01:15:18.000 He's a fucking construction worker, fella. 1.00
01:15:20.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:15:20.000 He was out there. 1.00
01:15:22.000 He wired everything so it all goes under the floor and it comes out through the legs of the table.
01:15:28.000 The wires go through the legs of the table so there's no wires exposed and the whole thing is set up. 0.95
01:15:33.000 It's really fucking sweet. 0.90
01:15:34.000 It's really sweet. 0.98
01:15:35.000 It's got cameras, like high-def cameras facing everybody and they're all controlled and remote control.
01:15:40.000 It's got like a little broadcast booth.
01:15:42.000 I mean, it's amazing when he's done.
01:15:43.000 Like, you go over there and you get mad podcast studio envy.
01:15:48.000 Yeah.
01:15:49.000 He took it to the next level.
01:15:50.000 He's making it happen.
01:15:52.000 We gotta follow that.
01:15:53.000 Did you have a nice time, though?
01:15:54.000 Did you have a nice show?
01:15:54.000 Oh, he was great.
01:15:55.000 He's a great guy.
01:15:56.000 What did you guys talk about?
01:15:57.000 That girl, Alison Rosen, is very funny, too.
01:15:59.000 His little sidekick.
01:16:01.000 She's cute. 0.95
01:16:01.000 She's hilarious. 0.95
01:16:04.000 What did we talk about?
01:16:05.000 Everything.
01:16:07.000 Cool. 1.00
01:16:08.000 Pussy? 1.00
01:16:09.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:16:09.000 Talked about... 1.00
01:16:10.000 It was all these, like, you know, the hottest chicks in the world. 1.00
01:16:13.000 Like, they had something where they were debating whether or not women belonged to the hottest chicks in the world.
01:16:18.000 Me and him have very different tastes.
01:16:20.000 Like, he was talking about Olivia Munn, you know? 1.00
01:16:22.000 Olivia Munn is hot as fuck. 1.00
01:16:24.000 She's beautiful. 1.00
01:16:24.000 Okay, right? 1.00
01:16:24.000 That's about as hot as you can get. 1.00
01:16:25.000 Am I right?
01:16:26.000 I agree.
01:16:26.000 Okay.
01:16:27.000 Okay.
01:16:27.000 But he was like, ah, I've been to her house.
01:16:30.000 She's not really that. 0.89
01:16:30.000 She's got smelly feet. 0.89
01:16:31.000 She's not that. 0.71
01:16:32.000 There's some girls. 1.00
01:16:34.000 And he was talking about, you know, some girls walk into a room and just, you know, everything just stops.
01:16:39.000 And you just want to talk to them.
01:16:41.000 Right.
01:16:41.000 That Olivia Munn's not like that.
01:16:43.000 I'm like, alright.
01:16:43.000 Really?
01:16:44.000 That's crazy talk.
01:16:45.000 Whatever, son.
01:16:46.000 Yeah.
01:16:47.000 Living Mom is on my top five.
01:16:50.000 She came out of nowhere.
01:16:51.000 I liked her with Kevin Pereira on that show.
01:16:54.000 Whatever.
01:16:55.000 Attack of the show.
01:16:56.000 But then I fell in love with her. 1.00
01:16:57.000 And then she left the fucking show. 1.00
01:16:59.000 Joey, hit that shit off Mike. 1.00
01:17:01.000 Let me tell you something. 1.00
01:17:02.000 I had a great time in fucking Columbus last week. 0.98
01:17:04.000 And in Cleveland, I just want to say it before I forget. 0.98
01:17:06.000 Pittsburgh, I really did.
01:17:08.000 Yeah, me too. 1.00
01:17:09.000 That fucking Columbus, man. 1.00
01:17:11.000 There were some crazy motherfuckers there. 1.00
01:17:13.000 Izzy Rock, Jason, Justin, the guy that made us the fucking edibles. 1.00
01:17:17.000 I still got some fucking candy left in the house. 1.00
01:17:20.000 You know, fucking Cleveland was crazy. 1.00
01:17:22.000 We're outside. 1.00
01:17:22.000 That garage shop is a cool fucking spot, man. 1.00
01:17:25.000 Fuck yeah. 1.00
01:17:25.000 That's a cool fucking spot if you don't want to perform at the improv. 1.00
01:17:28.000 We got nothing against the improv. 0.98
01:17:30.000 But that garage shop is a cool spot and a cool part of town. 0.98
01:17:33.000 You know, Pittsburgh, it was an honor to go to fucking Pittsburgh. 0.99
01:17:37.000 But man, has the economy destroyed those little cities, man. 0.99
01:17:40.000 Really?
01:17:41.000 The bar we were at is only open when there's a Pittsburgh Pirate game or a football game.
01:17:46.000 And it's across the street from the stadium.
01:17:48.000 It's called Mullins. 0.99
01:17:49.000 They were fucking great. 1.00
01:17:50.000 The barbecue sandwich was great. 0.99
01:17:52.000 And the guy was telling me that it's just people don't go to that side of town no more.
01:17:56.000 Wow.
01:17:57.000 Like people, you know, this is not a seven-night-a-week industry no more.
01:18:00.000 People going out. 0.96
01:18:01.000 And in Pittsburgh, they go out to watch the games, they get fucked up and they go there. 0.95
01:18:05.000 And you know, I've been going to Pittsburgh for 30 years. 0.89
01:18:08.000 It's amazing that you go to these cities and you see these people and you say to yourself, what's next for these people?
01:18:14.000 I mean, this is the real core.
01:18:15.000 It's so funny how I was losing...
01:18:18.000 I was hating doing comedy in LA. And it transpired for me like I was starting to hate to do comedy.
01:18:24.000 And it was because I was doing too much comedy in LA, Joe.
01:18:28.000 I wasn't doing comedy for real people.
01:18:29.000 I was forgetting what I was doing comedy for.
01:18:32.000 When you're in LA a long time, like I was and we are, we don't travel like normal headliners.
01:18:37.000 They go out every week. 0.99
01:18:39.000 When I'm in LA, you're thinking about shit that you think in LA. And you think there's going to be somebody in the audience or who's here with you or... 0.98
01:18:46.000 Or what you're saying. 0.98
01:18:47.000 When you're on the road and you're talking to people in the Midwest or in Texas, they're fucking real. 0.96
01:18:53.000 You gotta bring it a different way. 0.97
01:18:55.000 I can't bring it like LA way.
01:18:57.000 And that's what I like about going on the road again.
01:19:00.000 I really enjoy it.
01:19:01.000 People are like, do you really like going to the Midwest?
01:19:03.000 No.
01:19:03.000 I went there.
01:19:04.000 I fucking love it. 0.95
01:19:05.000 I love going to Iowa. 0.98
01:19:06.000 I love going to all those spots like that.
01:19:08.000 Once or twice a year, just to remind you.
01:19:10.000 That it's not all the big city, man. 0.99
01:19:12.000 We met some cool fucking people. 0.98
01:19:14.000 We've seen some great properties, some great trees. 0.99
01:19:17.000 It's spread out, no traffic.
01:19:19.000 We got too much weed.
01:19:20.000 Yeah, we got too much weed.
01:19:23.000 You know, and it's hard to see these cities like they got nothing. 0.99
01:19:26.000 And these are the people that are really voting and shit. 0.98
01:19:28.000 Like, we don't really know the country's issues. 1.00
01:19:30.000 We see a thousand fucking cars and 20 weed stores and shit. 1.00
01:19:34.000 And all the restaurants around here are fucking open. 1.00
01:19:36.000 You know? 0.99
01:19:37.000 We went to Pittsburgh, dog, on a Saturday night.
01:19:40.000 All those businesses were for lease.
01:19:43.000 That's the truth.
01:19:44.000 Those are the people that are really voting. 0.99
01:19:45.000 Those are the people that are really paying attention to what the fucking issues are. 1.00
01:19:49.000 Cleveland's rough, man. 0.99
01:19:49.000 We went to Cleveland on the Maxim tour years ago, and I remember driving around the city going, wow, there's not a lot of hope in this city. 0.99
01:19:55.000 There's not a lot going on here. 1.00
01:19:56.000 But the people are bad motherfuckers. 0.99
01:19:59.000 They just got so much to work with. 1.00
01:20:00.000 Ohio's got a lot of good people.
01:20:01.000 Yeah, no, no, no.
01:20:02.000 Ohio's always, man. 0.86
01:20:04.000 When I used to work for the sports betting service, they were the biggest...
01:20:07.000 A collection of gamblers.
01:20:08.000 Really? 1.00
01:20:09.000 In my mind, I'm like, all the sharpest guys in New York and Vegas, they wipe their ass. 1.00
01:20:14.000 That whole Youngstown with the Hall of Famers, all that shit, that's big book making. 1.00
01:20:21.000 Big! 0.99
01:20:21.000 You know, you gotta remember one thing, guys. 0.99
01:20:23.000 The worse the economy gets, the more book making, prostitution gets bigger and drug sales.
01:20:29.000 Tell me, Ma.
01:20:30.000 Drug sales go amazing.
01:20:32.000 You know, that's why the mob and organized crime will never go away.
01:20:35.000 They make more money when the economy's bad.
01:20:37.000 You know, when we had the prohibition of the Great Depression, those mobsters were making money selling booze. 1.00
01:20:43.000 People want to forget about their fucking problems. 0.99
01:20:45.000 It really is. 1.00
01:20:46.000 The worse the economy is, the more money people have to take a gamble with.
01:20:50.000 It's really weird to say.
01:20:51.000 There's more gambling.
01:20:53.000 Because people are desperate. 1.00
01:20:54.000 So people are like, fuck it. 1.00
01:20:55.000 I'll gamble more. 1.00
01:20:56.000 I'll drink more. 1.00
01:20:58.000 The only fucking things that do not get affected by the economy is crime. 1.00
01:21:03.000 Think about it. 1.00
01:21:04.000 Gambling does not get affected.
01:21:05.000 Vegas is still booming.
01:21:07.000 Every week we hear how, oh my god, we went to Vegas and there was nobody there.
01:21:11.000 They keep building, aren't they?
01:21:12.000 They're getting money from somewhere.
01:21:14.000 Somebody's putting their bets, and it ain't me and you, but somebody's losing.
01:21:17.000 Yeah, they're just banking on the fact that it's going to bounce back.
01:21:20.000 And they stopped a lot of the building, though.
01:21:23.000 Yeah, they stopped a lot of it.
01:21:25.000 They were getting nutty.
01:21:26.000 They were getting nutty for a while.
01:21:27.000 They just opened a casino in Vegas when we were there.
01:21:30.000 Or, I mean, in Cleveland while we were there that weekend.
01:21:32.000 And that's, like, another way for them to try to bounce back.
01:21:35.000 Remember when Eva Langoria opened up, like, a spot? 0.88
01:21:40.000 A restaurant. 0.96
01:21:40.000 Didn't she open up, like, a nightclub or some shit? 0.96
01:21:42.000 Yeah, a restaurant. 0.96
01:21:43.000 It's still there.
01:21:44.000 I don't know if she owns it.
01:21:46.000 You know, I don't drive by there.
01:21:47.000 I'm a Beso.
01:21:48.000 Is that what it is?
01:21:49.000 Beso on Hollywood Boulevard.
01:21:50.000 No, no, no, no, no.
01:21:51.000 This is in Vegas.
01:21:52.000 Oh, Vegas?
01:21:53.000 I'm sorry.
01:21:54.000 No, no, no, no.
01:21:55.000 Yeah, she had like a club or something.
01:21:58.000 Listen, bro, I never figured out somebody coming to you, Joe Rogan, and going, I'm going to open up a club.
01:22:02.000 When you're in Vegas, come hang out.
01:22:04.000 We'll give you a kickback.
01:22:05.000 It's part of your club.
01:22:06.000 You give whatever percent they want.
01:22:08.000 What's that called when you lend money and there's no guarantee?
01:22:11.000 You know, you give a certain amount and...
01:22:14.000 I mean, how much do you make from that? 1.00
01:22:16.000 You got 19 fucking partners. 1.00
01:22:18.000 That's why I told you, I told you specifically, and I know you don't like this shit, but you really gotta watch the pimp of Joe Namath. 1.00
01:22:25.000 It's been on again on fucking HBO, the sports thing they did for an hour. 1.00
01:22:29.000 That motherfucker had it so bad in New York that he finally said, fuck it, we gotta buy a bar. 1.00
01:22:35.000 They had to buy a bar. 1.00
01:22:36.000 They got sick and tired of going out after games and spending money.
01:22:40.000 Watch this documentary.
01:22:42.000 It is brilliant.
01:22:43.000 I watched it again the other day.
01:22:44.000 They bought a bar in New York?
01:22:46.000 Bought a bar in Midtown Manhattan. 1.00
01:22:48.000 His fucking slogan was, I like my woman blonde and I like my fucking scotch black. 1.00
01:22:53.000 That was his... 1.00
01:22:54.000 Dog, you gotta watch this thing!
01:22:56.000 And he's from this little town, and he just went to New York, bro.
01:23:00.000 I mean, he got married at like 42 because he had to. 0.99
01:23:04.000 Like, his knee was bad and shit. 1.00
01:23:05.000 He couldn't sling dick like he had to. 1.00
01:23:07.000 But he would've never got married. 1.00
01:23:09.000 Like, this guy was a fucking dick slinger. 1.00
01:23:12.000 He was slinging so much dick that he had to buy a bar. 1.00
01:23:15.000 Like, to keep all his bitches in line. 1.00
01:23:17.000 And then, they took the bar from him. 0.99
01:23:20.000 You gotta watch the whole thing.
01:23:21.000 Well, what is it called?
01:23:22.000 Uh...
01:23:24.000 CBS? Is it CBS? What, the bar?
01:23:26.000 No, the special.
01:23:28.000 It's on HBO. It's been on HBO for a couple months.
01:23:31.000 What's it called?
01:23:32.000 It's just called Namath.
01:23:33.000 Namath.
01:23:33.000 And you're going to love it because you remember.
01:23:35.000 It's not about football. 1.00
01:23:36.000 It's about what this motherfucker, how crazy he was. 1.00
01:23:39.000 And how he was just a good old boy. 1.00
01:23:41.000 But he owned New York, bro.
01:23:43.000 He just owned it. 0.99
01:23:44.000 He just had it by the balls. 1.00
01:23:46.000 But then they fucked him. 1.00
01:23:48.000 They said he had to close the bar. 1.00
01:23:49.000 They made him close the bar.
01:23:50.000 Why did they make him close the bar?
01:23:51.000 Because they said he had too many.
01:23:53.000 Weird people hanging out in there.
01:23:57.000 Too many weird people?
01:23:58.000 It's a bar.
01:24:00.000 It's a bar. 0.99
01:24:00.000 I know, but he had too many fucking weird people. 0.99
01:24:02.000 So watch this special. 0.98
01:24:04.000 You're really going to like it.
01:24:04.000 People that live above bars.
01:24:06.000 What a nutty way to live that is.
01:24:07.000 Or people that live above food.
01:24:10.000 Like fast food.
01:24:11.000 You know that grease smell was just going to go right up.
01:24:14.000 Or a Chinese restaurant living downstairs.
01:24:16.000 There's something dangerous about it, though. 1.00
01:24:18.000 You live on top of the bar when you're a fucking hokie. 1.00
01:24:21.000 That's the only reason why you would live. 0.99
01:24:23.000 In New York, you see all those bars with two dwellings over it.
01:24:28.000 Nobody decent lives over a bar.
01:24:30.000 They live over a bar because they know they're two minutes away no matter what happens.
01:24:34.000 I've only known a few people that lived like in Midtown, you know, like when I was struggling.
01:24:40.000 I only know a few people that where I got over their apartment and get to see like how they lived.
01:24:44.000 But like living in cities like New York where you get like studio apartments, that's a weird life, man.
01:24:52.000 It's weird.
01:24:53.000 You enter into a door, you open the door, you got like a little space and it's like a Tiny little sink, and there's like a little hot plate.
01:25:00.000 You know, a lot of people, they're living almost like in closets.
01:25:04.000 It's almost, it's like a big closet.
01:25:07.000 Not even a big closet.
01:25:08.000 Brody Stevens just got his first refrigerator, and it's not even a full-size refrigerator.
01:25:12.000 It's one of those small little refrigerators, and he's had one for, he didn't have one for like almost a year.
01:25:16.000 Oh my God.
01:25:18.000 Bro, I remember I used to date this girl, Julie Novak, and she was a Kansas girl, and I met her in Colorado.
01:25:23.000 I'd follow home to the restaurants where I did comedy at.
01:25:26.000 You know how you meet people like, I'm moving to New York, I'm gung-ho.
01:25:30.000 She went to New York with her buddy.
01:25:31.000 It was a childhood dream.
01:25:33.000 She had to go to New York.
01:25:34.000 She's from Kansas. 0.51
01:25:35.000 They went to New York and they moved to 15th Street, up the block from Manhattan, Honda.
01:25:40.000 15th, like in 9th Avenue there.
01:25:42.000 They were paying $1,800 a month.
01:25:44.000 This is 1994. It was just what you said.
01:25:48.000 You open the door.
01:25:49.000 It was a combination.
01:25:51.000 One room.
01:25:51.000 1,800 a month.
01:25:52.000 1,800.
01:25:53.000 One room.
01:25:54.000 A TV with a fireplace that didn't work.
01:25:57.000 It was one room.
01:25:58.000 And then you open the door and there was a little kitchen and the bathroom was there. 0.99
01:26:01.000 So when I had to fuck her, the roommate was... 1.00
01:26:03.000 And she had a roommate. 1.00
01:26:04.000 Oh, no.
01:26:04.000 Because they couldn't afford the 1,800.
01:26:07.000 She had a roommate. 1.00
01:26:08.000 So she would have to sleep in the fucking living room and I would fuck her in the kitchen on the floor. 1.00
01:26:12.000 Oh, my God. 1.00
01:26:13.000 And couldn't fit your feet.
01:26:14.000 Oh, my God.
01:26:15.000 Horrible.
01:26:16.000 Horrible.
01:26:17.000 1,800 a month. 1.00
01:26:18.000 Just to fulfill her dream to live in fucking New York. 1.00
01:26:21.000 Are you fucking crazy? 1.00
01:26:23.000 What is that? 1.00
01:26:24.000 Why is that dream so... 1.00
01:26:25.000 People love that shit. 1.00
01:26:26.000 I just want to go to New York. 1.00
01:26:27.000 And then they get mugged.
01:26:28.000 One minute you look up, it's a beautiful day. 1.00
01:26:30.000 You look down, your bags are gone, you fucking momo. 1.00
01:26:33.000 But what is it about, I guess, there's something about being able to tell people that you live in the city. 1.00
01:26:37.000 That you live in Manhattan or you live in New York or whatever. 1.00
01:26:41.000 Listen, like I told it a thousand times, you're going to live in New York City, if you're not living like John Lennon in the Dakota, go fuck your mother. 1.00
01:26:47.000 You know what I'm saying? 1.00
01:26:48.000 Go fuck yourself. 1.00
01:26:49.000 I'm going to struggle and drive down. 1.00
01:26:52.000 John Lennon lived at the motherfucking Dakota, and he walked around. 0.97
01:26:56.000 And good, he got shot, whatever, but he walked around. 0.98
01:26:58.000 Good?
01:26:59.000 No, no, what I'm saying is, you know, he got shot.
01:27:02.000 He didn't have a bodyguard.
01:27:03.000 He was just a regular guy.
01:27:05.000 Yeah. 0.96
01:27:05.000 He would walk through Central Park every day and get freshly squeezed orange juice and didn't give a fuck if it cost $12 or not because he's John Lennon. 0.96
01:27:13.000 So the Dakota's like a really nice place, is that what it is?
01:27:16.000 Where else are you going to live?
01:27:17.000 Is that the nicest place?
01:27:19.000 That topples everything.
01:27:20.000 Really?
01:27:20.000 That's not stone over anything.
01:27:22.000 Well, I live at the Plaza, bitch. 1.00
01:27:23.000 I live in the motherfucking Dakota. 1.00
01:27:25.000 And my name is Tom Petty. 0.98
01:27:27.000 What is like...
01:27:28.000 Is that like what it is like?
01:27:29.000 What is like a room?
01:27:31.000 Go look it up.
01:27:32.000 Dakota.
01:27:32.000 What's your average property on a Dakota?
01:27:34.000 Because I think you have to buy the condo.
01:27:36.000 And they got to be three, four million dollars. 0.99
01:27:38.000 Which is really a fucking apartment. 1.00
01:27:40.000 Which is really a fucking apartment. 1.00
01:27:41.000 It's got to be more than that, right? 0.99
01:27:42.000 I mean, I can't...
01:27:43.000 I know he had two of them in there.
01:27:44.000 You know, people who live in the Dakota are just like authors who get banked.
01:27:48.000 That's the type of people.
01:27:50.000 Everything around the Dakota is expensive. 1.00
01:27:52.000 You know, if you live in the Dakota, it's because you fucking... 0.99
01:27:54.000 Wow, what a beautiful building. 1.00
01:27:56.000 Oh, it's beautiful, dog. 1.00
01:27:57.000 It's the shit. 1.00
01:27:57.000 That's the only way to fucking do it. 1.00
01:28:00.000 If you're going to do it. 0.98
01:28:01.000 It's incredible.
01:28:02.000 I'm going to live in Bronx or Brooklyn or Queens and drive in or take the A train. 1.00
01:28:06.000 Fuck you. 1.00
01:28:07.000 I'm staying right there in the Dakota, right? 1.00
01:28:10.000 Central Park.
01:28:10.000 Isn't it weird if you think about it, what that building is?
01:28:13.000 It's like a safe for rich people.
01:28:15.000 For rich people.
01:28:15.000 It's like inside that safe.
01:28:17.000 You crack that safe over and there's a bunch of rich people in there.
01:28:20.000 I mean, that's what it is.
01:28:21.000 And it's right there on the street where all the poor people can drive by and look at all the rich.
01:28:25.000 Like, inside there, well, all they have to do is say, well, you know what, though?
01:28:30.000 You know, society is functional and there are police officers, so it's not feasible that we go in and just take all the stuff out of there, so we just leave it alone.
01:28:38.000 But they know where the stuff is.
01:28:40.000 The stuff is all in that room.
01:28:41.000 That big box, that's a big mousetrap of rich people.
01:28:47.000 That's all that is.
01:28:48.000 It's a bank.
01:28:48.000 There's like little pockets in that bank and inside that bank you can get money and there's jewelry and there's expensive stuff all throughout that place.
01:28:56.000 You can't get there. 0.97
01:28:57.000 Well, you can't get in there now, but if the shit hits the fan, yeah, you can get in there. 0.99
01:29:01.000 You can get in there easy. 0.99
01:29:02.000 That's one of the first things they're going to get into.
01:29:04.000 You think so? 1.00
01:29:05.000 Fuck yeah. 1.00
01:29:06.000 Fuck yeah. 1.00
01:29:06.000 When the shit hits the fan, why wouldn't you charge to Dakota? 1.00
01:29:09.000 You know, the only thing that would fuck you up is bodyguards. 1.00
01:29:12.000 You know, how many dudes are rocking bodyguards? 0.98
01:29:14.000 Probably a lot in that place.
01:29:15.000 Yeah, they're rocking bodyguards.
01:29:16.000 So you got a bunch of armed killers that are laying weight. 0.99
01:29:19.000 Machine guns on the roof and all that shit. 0.99
01:29:20.000 But how long before they quit, too, and get the fuck out of there? 0.99
01:29:24.000 After a couple of weeks, this place is abandoned. 0.97
01:29:26.000 Well, see, what does it cost to live there, Joe?
01:29:29.000 What's a property in the Dakota?
01:29:31.000 Okay, let's check out real estate.
01:29:33.000 I wonder if it's even for sale.
01:29:35.000 Am I? I wonder if it's even for sale.
01:29:37.000 Yeah, they gotta be for sale.
01:29:39.000 What are you talking about?
01:29:40.000 Did you see that some guy in New York is selling his parking space for a million a year?
01:29:44.000 What?
01:29:45.000 Did you see that?
01:29:46.000 A million a year for a parking spot?
01:29:48.000 A million a year for a parking spot.
01:29:49.000 People think about it.
01:29:50.000 They're like, well, it's here.
01:29:52.000 It's there.
01:29:52.000 It's close by.
01:29:54.000 I don't have to pay for fucking tickets. 1.00
01:29:56.000 That's hilarious. 0.99
01:29:59.000 Apartments for sale of the Dakota, New York City, Manhattan, Condos.
01:30:04.000 One of the most famous residence buildings in all of New York is the Dakota.
01:30:07.000 It was a bold building when it was first developed.
01:30:10.000 Built so far north of the pulse of the city at the time, citizens snickered and nicknamed it the Dakota, a reference to the states of North and South Dakota, which were very far away from New York City.
01:30:23.000 Isn't that funny?
01:30:23.000 They nicknamed it Dakota because they thought it was too far away.
01:30:26.000 Meanwhile, this crazy city has built up so much, now it's actually in the heart of everything.
01:30:31.000 Isn't that weird?
01:30:32.000 That is weird.
01:30:33.000 New York City must have been way smaller back then, I guess.
01:30:36.000 Yeah, it has to have been.
01:30:38.000 Yeah, I mean, it's a crazy place, man.
01:30:40.000 Every time I go there, I fantasize about living there for, like, short periods of time.
01:30:44.000 But I, you know, I never, I don't think I can do it.
01:30:48.000 I'd freak out.
01:30:49.000 I'd have panic attacks.
01:30:50.000 It's too much.
01:30:51.000 Too much.
01:30:52.000 You gotta, like, realize that that is, you're getting interaction.
01:30:56.000 You're definitely getting something off of those people.
01:30:59.000 I don't know what it is, but I know there's a difference between the way I feel.
01:31:03.000 When I'm standing on a mountain and I look out and I see fields and I see clouds and I see birds flying overhead, there's a different feeling than when I'm on the 405. When I'm on the 405, there's a hive of humanity and there's some residual effect that you get from all these people.
01:31:20.000 There's a different feeling that you get when you're in a city.
01:31:23.000 There's an awareness of humans.
01:31:25.000 Collective stress.
01:31:27.000 Yeah, there's something.
01:31:28.000 It's like, it's pheromonal. 0.99
01:31:29.000 Whatever the fuck it is, it's in the air, man. 0.99
01:31:32.000 It's not as simple and as innocuous as if you're not touching me, you're not affecting me. 0.99
01:31:37.000 I think it's, we're affected by our environment in some strange way.
01:31:40.000 So that's why I don't think I can do it in New York City.
01:31:43.000 When I was at my mom's house this weekend and she lives in the middle of nowhere like just farms like across the street from her is a strawberry field and like it's just in the middle of nowhere and at night when I was sitting in my car waiting to go inside her house I was just like it was so quiet and so like the stars and oh and it was just it was like this is I would not have any stress if I got to come home to this yeah it's different it's crazy it's different You close your door, you hear cars driving by your street.
01:32:11.000 You might hear your neighbor.
01:32:13.000 You got wizards.
01:32:14.000 Wizards are in the neighborhood. 1.00
01:32:16.000 You realize how much unnecessary shit you have to deal with. 1.00
01:32:22.000 How much unnecessary stuff is inside your head. 1.00
01:32:25.000 What it's all about.
01:32:27.000 It's all about Life is supposed to be about enjoyment, right?
01:32:32.000 It's supposed to be about having a good time.
01:32:34.000 It's not supposed to be about dealing with all this extracurricular nonsense. 0.99
01:32:38.000 And we shouldn't have to have so many fucking people around us. 0.99
01:32:41.000 Like, we shouldn't be living here. 1.00
01:32:43.000 This is silly.
01:32:44.000 Why live with this 20 million people? 0.94
01:32:47.000 It's really weird when you talk to somebody like...
01:32:53.000 Somebody who lives in New York.
01:32:54.000 I'm trying to figure out a comic who lives in New York. 0.98
01:32:57.000 That they just fucking love it. 0.98
01:32:58.000 They couldn't imagine living somewhere else. 0.98
01:33:01.000 Yeah.
01:33:01.000 Some people fit into that.
01:33:02.000 A lot of people love it.
01:33:03.000 You know, for me, I don't mind.
01:33:05.000 Gaffigan lives there.
01:33:06.000 He loves it.
01:33:07.000 Who's that?
01:33:07.000 Gaffigan.
01:33:08.000 He's got kids, too.
01:33:09.000 He lives there.
01:33:10.000 You know, some people, they find a good place there.
01:33:13.000 You know what? 0.99
01:33:14.000 I saw a fucking crazy picture of Anderson Cooper. 1.00
01:33:17.000 Anderson Cooper lives in a firehouse. 1.00
01:33:19.000 Does he really?
01:33:20.000 Like the Ghostbusters?
01:33:21.000 In a converted firehouse.
01:33:22.000 Oh, dude.
01:33:23.000 How awesome is that?
01:33:24.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:33:25.000 Well, it was a stupid fucking thread on my board where people were talking about Anderson Cooper being gay. 1.00
01:33:29.000 Like, who gives a fuck if he's gay? 1.00
01:33:31.000 Who cares? 1.00
01:33:31.000 Unless you want to fuck him or he's trying to fuck you. 1.00
01:33:33.000 What do you care? 1.00
01:33:33.000 Can you imagine bringing a girl home and, like, I'll be right down and, like, coming down, like, on a fire pool, you know, with a bottle of champagne. 1.00
01:33:41.000 Yeah, there's images for it.
01:33:43.000 I guess you can see the actual place. 0.92
01:33:47.000 That would be the ultimate podcast studio, fucking making it out of a fire station or something weird like that. 0.94
01:33:52.000 Something along those lines, yeah. 0.97
01:33:54.000 You know what would be the ultimate?
01:33:55.000 Would be that missile silo that that drug dealer had in that Vice documentary.
01:34:02.000 Remember that?
01:34:03.000 Yeah.
01:34:05.000 He buys a $4.3 million New York home.
01:34:09.000 Anderson Cooper has bought a firehouse.
01:34:15.000 The 8,240 square foot home.
01:34:19.000 Wow, that's a huge place in Manhattan.
01:34:21.000 At 84 West 3rd Street between Sullivan and Thompson's, which he purchased in September, boasts the original spiral staircase brass fire poles.
01:34:29.000 That's so beautiful.
01:34:31.000 It's pretty dope.
01:34:32.000 The fire station's pretty sweet, too.
01:34:33.000 Well, the crazy thing is...
01:34:34.000 Oh, yeah.
01:34:35.000 I see what you're saying.
01:34:36.000 What's crazy is it still says fire patrol on it, and it's his house now.
01:34:40.000 Yeah, I mean, that's kind of dangerous, isn't it?
01:34:42.000 Like people coming up to the place and be like, help, I need to drop off this.
01:34:46.000 I wonder how many babies he gets dropped off.
01:34:49.000 What if Anderson Cooper comes out of his house every morning and there's like two babies?
01:34:52.000 And he's like, goddammit, again?
01:34:54.000 $4.3 million.
01:34:55.000 That's wild.
01:34:56.000 It's amazing.
01:34:57.000 This is fire. 1.00
01:34:57.000 Because somebody's getting fucked in that motherfucker. 1.00
01:35:00.000 You pay 4.3 for a fucking fire truck house? 1.00
01:35:04.000 See if they left the fucking fire engine down. 1.00
01:35:06.000 That's a pussy magnet. 1.00
01:35:07.000 Or an asshole magnet. 1.00
01:35:09.000 Whatever it is that you like. 1.00
01:35:10.000 It's an asshole magnet. 1.00
01:35:11.000 I think it's been converted. 1.00
01:35:12.000 I mean, I think inside it's pretty dope.
01:35:15.000 It's more than 8,000 square feet. 1.00
01:35:18.000 That's a big fucking house. 1.00
01:35:19.000 In New York City? 1.00
01:35:20.000 Fuck yeah. 1.00
01:35:21.000 In New York City, that's enormous. 0.99
01:35:22.000 But there's all these cool photos of it.
01:35:24.000 It's pretty dope, man.
01:35:26.000 You gotta be creative.
01:35:27.000 That's as creative as it gets. 1.00
01:35:28.000 An old fucking firehouse. 1.00
01:35:29.000 They guaranteed I'd love to know if they left the poles inside so he could fly down the fucking pole. 1.00
01:35:35.000 I know I would. 0.99
01:35:36.000 That's part of the deal.
01:35:37.000 And I'd have the Batman thing to shoot right back up.
01:35:40.000 You gotta fly down the pole.
01:35:42.000 You gotta fly down the pole.
01:35:43.000 Yeah, you gotta fly down the pole in the morning.
01:35:44.000 He's got a garage, man.
01:35:46.000 How about having a garage in New York City? 1.00
01:35:47.000 Who the fuck has a garage? 0.99
01:35:49.000 He bought a house with a garage. 1.00
01:35:50.000 Now, see, I would live in New York City if I could live like that.
01:35:53.000 There's only one way to live in New York, guys. 1.00
01:35:56.000 And that's with a lot of fucking Gitas. 1.00
01:35:58.000 Because it costs a lot of fucking Gitas to live in New York. 1.00
01:36:01.000 Yeah, if you're super rich, you could pull off living there. 1.00
01:36:05.000 Who gives a fuck? 0.99
01:36:05.000 I'd take a cab everywhere and freshly squeezed and bagels for 20 bucks. 0.99
01:36:10.000 Who gives a fuck? 0.99
01:36:10.000 Well, a lot of guys just have drivers. 0.99
01:36:12.000 Those super rich dudes that have, like, penthouses there, they just have, like, a driver, you know?
01:36:17.000 Look at that place.
01:36:18.000 That's his house?
01:36:19.000 Yeah.
01:36:19.000 Whose house?
01:36:20.000 Interesting people.
01:36:21.000 Oh, my God.
01:36:22.000 This is, I think, the people that lived before or when it was on sale, I'm guessing.
01:36:27.000 Oh my god. 1.00
01:36:28.000 That is fucking killer, man. 1.00
01:36:31.000 What a killer house. 1.00
01:36:32.000 You can put jacuzzis in there.
01:36:35.000 Jacuzzis? 0.96
01:36:36.000 I've been to one incredible house in New York.
01:36:40.000 It was a friend of mine's dad had a penthouse place.
01:36:43.000 I don't remember what homeboy did, but he was very wealthy.
01:36:46.000 And we went to the top of this building, and that's where the apartment was. 0.98
01:36:51.000 And the fucking view was insane. 0.99
01:36:54.000 It was insane. 1.00
01:36:56.000 He was just in the middle of all these giant buildings.
01:36:59.000 They were all lit up, and he had this enormous glass opening, like his window.
01:37:05.000 He was on a corner.
01:37:06.000 He had a corner penthouse, and it was staggering.
01:37:10.000 You would look out there, and you'd just go, wow.
01:37:12.000 Like, you kind of get it.
01:37:13.000 It's like, they get to live like in a science fiction movie.
01:37:16.000 Like, every day, they look out their window. 0.99
01:37:19.000 They're on the 90th floor of some fucking building or whatever the hell it is. 0.98
01:37:22.000 You know, I don't know what the highest building is there now. 0.98
01:37:25.000 But, I mean, if you're on the 50th, 60th floor and you're looking out and seeing all of Manhattan and you're, like, in the heat of it, it is kind of crazy science fiction, man.
01:37:33.000 If you were, like, really into that, like, man, I could see.
01:37:37.000 I think the baddest house I ever seen was a maroon house. 1.00
01:37:41.000 Creek Maroon Bells in Aspen, Colorado.
01:37:43.000 We were building a house.
01:37:45.000 I was working for an electrician and a guy next door.
01:37:47.000 We became friendly with him and he would show us.
01:37:49.000 This guy was like a weird producer. 0.99
01:37:51.000 Don't ask me who the fuck it was. 0.99
01:37:52.000 He built the house from scratch. 0.99
01:37:54.000 But I could tell then he was kind of off the chain, like not a junkie or nothing.
01:37:59.000 He had man-made hot springs in his yard.
01:38:02.000 Like you would walk away under the moonlight, and he had them like 40 yards from his house.
01:38:07.000 He had like four different ones.
01:38:08.000 It was just amazing the view he had of Colorado looking down from one of the top cliffs up in Maroon's Bells. 0.99
01:38:15.000 I mean, it was fucking... 0.99
01:38:16.000 It would take your breath away. 1.00
01:38:18.000 It would really go, like you would fucking, it would take your breath away. 0.99
01:38:21.000 That's really weird to see that. 0.98
01:38:23.000 Yeah, views are worth a lot.
01:38:24.000 Views are worth a lot, yeah.
01:38:25.000 To me, views are huge.
01:38:27.000 You know, some people don't care.
01:38:29.000 They'd rather just be in a nice neighborhood or whatever. 1.00
01:38:31.000 I like looking out the window and seeing shit. 1.00
01:38:34.000 When I look out the window and see shit, it's inspiring. 1.00
01:38:37.000 That was one of the best parts of Colorado. 0.99
01:38:39.000 One of the best parts is being able to look out the window and just see the mountains and the trees.
01:38:44.000 If you could look over the ocean, that's like the best view, where you got a little bit of mountain, a little bit of ocean.
01:38:50.000 You can just stand there.
01:38:51.000 It's like you're looking at the greatest natural art ever created.
01:38:55.000 One of nature's most beautiful and wondrous accomplishments is the beauty of nature itself.
01:39:01.000 Looking at mountains, looking at the water.
01:39:04.000 Looking especially from afar, looking at all of it together.
01:39:07.000 Like when you're flying into Hawaii and you can't even believe how beautiful it is. 1.00
01:39:11.000 Look at this fucking place. 1.00
01:39:12.000 Look at it. 1.00
01:39:13.000 It charges you up just with its own natural beauty. 1.00
01:39:17.000 But even Malibu has natural fucking beauty. 0.99
01:39:20.000 Malibu's staggering. 1.00
01:39:21.000 Natural fucking beauty. 1.00
01:39:23.000 Columbus, I've seen some shit. 1.00
01:39:25.000 The trees, the way they were cut. 1.00
01:39:27.000 You ever look at Malibu real estate?
01:39:29.000 Have you ever looked?
01:39:30.000 No.
01:39:31.000 Jesus Christ.
01:39:32.000 No, you go online and Google Malibu real estate and see some of the houses for $60 million.
01:39:38.000 What?
01:39:40.000 Where is all this money coming from?
01:39:42.000 Who are all these people?
01:39:43.000 How many rich people are there?
01:39:44.000 Jesus Christ, there's some people buying up $60 million houses?
01:39:48.000 I know we talked about this a long time ago on that podcast, but I don't know if we had video back then.
01:39:52.000 But remember Mike Tyson's abandoned mansion in Southington, Ohio?
01:39:58.000 And people in Ohio would just break into it because he abandoned it.
01:40:02.000 And it was still furnished, and it was like he just left it.
01:40:07.000 And it was really creepy because the water, the inside pool had not been treated for a long time.
01:40:12.000 Yeah.
01:40:13.000 And like, look at this bathroom.
01:40:14.000 This is like a crazy shower.
01:40:17.000 Wow.
01:40:17.000 And they had zoos.
01:40:19.000 Oh, there's the cages for his animals.
01:40:20.000 Yeah, the cages for his animals on the back.
01:40:22.000 And then they had his own basketball court.
01:40:25.000 Team Tyson.
01:40:27.000 And then... 0.99
01:40:27.000 Remember, that was like Don King got him into all that Team Tyson shit. 0.99
01:40:30.000 And look how nice it is outside in Ohio. 0.99
01:40:33.000 Can you imagine?
01:40:34.000 That would all be yours.
01:40:35.000 Oh, my God.
01:40:37.000 It's pretty cool.
01:40:38.000 You just walked away from that?
01:40:39.000 Is that for sale?
01:40:40.000 Yeah, he just walked away from it.
01:40:41.000 Oh, I'm sure it's for sale.
01:40:41.000 Bro, guys, he walked away five of them like that.
01:40:43.000 I heard his house in Jersey was fucking gorgeous. 0.93
01:40:46.000 Is that still for sale? 0.98
01:40:47.000 Probably.
01:40:48.000 I don't know.
01:40:48.000 But, like, the website that that's from is called Illicit Ohio.
01:40:51.000 It's one of my favorite websites. 0.99
01:40:53.000 It's just abandoned shit in Ohio. 0.99
01:40:55.000 Like, look at this old music school where there's just a bunch of keyboards lined up. 1.00
01:40:59.000 Is there a lot of abandoned shit in Ohio? 0.99
01:41:01.000 Oh, yeah. 1.00
01:41:01.000 This is just a guy that, you know, he's fascinated with it. 1.00
01:41:04.000 And he talks about, like, the old penitentiary.
01:41:08.000 Here's old amusement parks and stuff.
01:41:10.000 What's the website called?
01:41:11.000 Air Force Town.
01:41:12.000 What's it called?
01:41:13.000 It's called Illicit Ohio.
01:41:14.000 Illicit Ohio.
01:41:15.000 I-L-L-I-C-I-T-Ohio.com.
01:41:20.000 Wow.
01:41:20.000 But here's an Air Force town, which is great.
01:41:21.000 What a cool blog.
01:41:22.000 Yeah.
01:41:23.000 And...
01:41:24.000 What is that, a broken roller coaster?
01:41:26.000 What are we doing?
01:41:26.000 We're just watching things.
01:41:29.000 The conversation has actually eroded to us scrolling through it together. 0.99
01:41:35.000 But Mike Tyson's old house, I wonder if you would be creeped out if you bought it and you knew that Mike Tyson would just gorilla fuck chicks in every room in the house. 0.97
01:41:44.000 No, it probably has a lot of positive energy in it. 0.98
01:41:46.000 You think so?
01:41:47.000 Oh, yeah.
01:41:48.000 Except for the Brad Pitt energy.
01:41:50.000 Oh, yeah.
01:41:52.000 That story's hilarious.
01:41:56.000 That's Joey Diaz's crumpling in the background, ladies and gentlemen.
01:41:58.000 What's up, guys?
01:41:59.000 What's the story? 0.99
01:42:00.000 How many of those fucking houses do you think Mike Tyson walked away from? 0.99
01:42:04.000 Probably a bunch, right? 1.00
01:42:05.000 Four.
01:42:05.000 Seven.
01:42:07.000 I mean, how much did he make?
01:42:08.000 He must have made like half a billion dollars or something crazy, right?
01:42:11.000 What did the guy rob from him?
01:42:12.000 Because they said everybody says that guy robbed him.
01:42:14.000 Don King?
01:42:15.000 Yeah.
01:42:15.000 Who knows?
01:42:16.000 Who knows?
01:42:16.000 Who knows where it all went?
01:42:17.000 Isn't it crazy, though, when you see that story repeated over and over again throughout history?
01:42:21.000 You know, guys make a shitload of money and then it all goes away.
01:42:24.000 Then they got none.
01:42:26.000 He had no idea how much money he had.
01:42:32.000 He had no idea what they just told him he had 80 million and go. 0.98
01:42:45.000 Why can't he fucking just accept the Bentley? 1.00
01:42:47.000 That's fucked up for the cops. 1.00
01:42:49.000 Because the cop could have sold that Bentley and not worked for like five years. 0.99
01:42:53.000 Like, quit. 1.00
01:42:54.000 I'm just going to live off this Bentley money, bitch. 1.00
01:42:56.000 And they sell that Bentley for a quarter million bucks. 0.99
01:42:59.000 They're worth a lot of money, aren't they?
01:43:00.000 Especially the convertibles.
01:43:02.000 He was so crazy, he was just crashing and giving them away.
01:43:05.000 He's going to do a one-man show now in Vegas.
01:43:07.000 Yeah, I heard he's already doing it.
01:43:09.000 I heard it's amazing.
01:43:10.000 He's already doing it?
01:43:10.000 I heard it's amazing.
01:43:11.000 It's amazing, bro.
01:43:12.000 That guy could tell a story like...
01:43:15.000 And don't even get him into boxing.
01:43:16.000 A one-man show in Vegas.
01:43:18.000 What a great idea. 0.96
01:43:19.000 He's a savage. 1.00
01:43:20.000 That guy's a fucking savage. 1.00
01:43:21.000 Joey Diaz, we need to get you a one-man show in Vegas. 1.00
01:43:24.000 He could just...
01:43:25.000 You could just...
01:43:26.000 Would you be willing to do that?
01:43:28.000 I could do everything.
01:43:29.000 Would you be willing to do a one-man show in Vegas?
01:43:30.000 No, not in Vegas.
01:43:31.000 I got plans already, dog.
01:43:32.000 Don't worry about it. 1.00
01:43:33.000 But he's the type of motherfucker that you could just let him go. 1.00
01:43:38.000 For hours, just about the trainer he had. 0.99
01:43:41.000 And then he has six chapters that you can go 12 hours on.
01:43:45.000 What's the original guy that adopted that?
01:43:48.000 Custom model.
01:43:49.000 Then he went with Teddy Alice.
01:43:50.000 And then his days with Don King. 0.99
01:43:52.000 Then his days with that fucking skank from Saved by the Bell. 1.00
01:43:56.000 Then his two years in fucking prison. 1.00
01:43:58.000 Then when he came out to the guys that kill brothers. 1.00
01:44:01.000 What's with the bow ties and shit. 1.00
01:44:03.000 Remember they were guarding him for a while. 1.00
01:44:05.000 Then two years ago he's smacking somebody in a fucking movie. 0.99
01:44:09.000 Do you understand the different extremes? 1.00
01:44:11.000 Not to mention he lost a little girl. 0.99
01:44:13.000 Not to mention he's fucking Mike Tyson. 0.99
01:44:16.000 And people look at him sometimes, and you may judge him, but that guy's Jimmy is fucking deep. 0.99
01:44:22.000 Deep. 0.99
01:44:23.000 Deep.
01:44:24.000 And when you watch that, we both watched that Tyson biography together, didn't we? 0.99
01:44:28.000 And he said some shit in the beginning that made you fucking think about Mike. 0.99
01:44:31.000 I remember we watched in a hotel room somewhere. 1.00
01:44:33.000 He said two or three things that you're like, you know, what the fuck? 0.99
01:44:36.000 You look at that guy, he's as intelligent and as deep as can be. 1.00
01:44:39.000 He'll figure you the fuck out. 1.00
01:44:41.000 He was beating fucking people up. 1.00
01:44:43.000 I just watched him against Irish Pat Murphy or something. 1.00
01:44:45.000 He's a killer. 1.00
01:44:46.000 The guy was a killer. 1.00
01:44:47.000 When he was at his best, we talk about him all the time, because when he was at his best, it was a force of nature. 0.64
01:44:54.000 Whenever someone can summon up intensity that other people just can't match, it's always fascinating to watch.
01:45:00.000 A guy who just raises it to the next level, and that's clearly what he did.
01:45:03.000 He came along and just took it to another place.
01:45:05.000 Everybody was like, whoa, we've never seen intensity like this before.
01:45:08.000 He's had eight chapters right in front of our eyes.
01:45:11.000 How many boxers do you know that went to prison in the middle of their career, or Football players.
01:45:16.000 And now they're making movies.
01:45:17.000 He went to prison under some pretty shady circumstances. 1.00
01:45:21.000 He went in there for fucking rape. 0.99
01:45:22.000 A girl who had already had falsely accused someone of rape. 1.00
01:45:27.000 She was only like 19 years old.
01:45:29.000 And she had already, before him, falsely accused somebody.
01:45:33.000 And they still didn't get him off.
01:45:35.000 And their defense was so crazy.
01:45:38.000 It was like, what do you expect him to do?
01:45:41.000 Look at who he is.
01:45:42.000 She should have known. 1.00
01:45:43.000 She should have known that if she's going to be alone with him, he was going to fuck her. 1.00
01:45:47.000 Like, that was the defense. 1.00
01:45:50.000 You can't say that.
01:45:51.000 That guy has thrown away more money.
01:45:55.000 Thrown away.
01:45:56.000 He's thrown away more money than a small country has in their bank account. 0.99
01:46:01.000 He's pissed through more money than 10 people lived through in a fucking lifetime. 0.99
01:46:05.000 You know how interesting that guy would be to get him stoned by mistake? 1.00
01:46:09.000 Like just to give him a hit of fucking some OG Kush and let that motherfucker go? 1.00
01:46:13.000 Just let him go. 1.00
01:46:15.000 Just about three of his boxing fights and what led up to it.
01:46:19.000 What happened in Japan against Buster Douglas. 0.99
01:46:22.000 So I wish him all the luck in the world because that's a true motherfucker right there. 0.99
01:46:26.000 We watched that guy come, go, come, go again. 1.00
01:46:31.000 His daughter died two years ago.
01:46:33.000 Not many people can bounce back from that, bro.
01:46:36.000 You know, and he's really trying.
01:46:38.000 You know, I used to see him at the YMCA. But for all the fucked up shit, I used to see him try because they had him in the rehab up there. 0.99
01:46:44.000 He was always pulling over and asking and teaching a kid how to throw a punch right. 1.00
01:46:49.000 You know what I'm saying, dog?
01:46:50.000 And that's what it's all about.
01:46:52.000 He would always stop and walk past the boxing thing.
01:46:55.000 And if he'd see somebody, he'd go in and go, let me help you.
01:46:59.000 He would hold the bag for you. 0.99
01:47:01.000 World fucking champion, hold the bag for you one time. 1.00
01:47:04.000 He can still talk, too. 1.00
01:47:06.000 He doesn't have problems forming sentences or anything.
01:47:08.000 He doesn't have, like, you know, speech issues.
01:47:12.000 So if you're going to do a one-man show, that's the last thing you need, you know?
01:47:16.000 That's the saddest thing about boxers, man, is you watch a great one, and then you watch him in an interview later in his career, and you hear him slurring his words, and you're like, man, he paid a big price for that life, that wild life of his.
01:47:28.000 He paid a big price.
01:47:29.000 You know, now we're sitting here watching it.
01:47:31.000 But some people, man, that must be maddening to know that, you know, your career has forced you to, in your later years, not be able to communicate right.
01:47:39.000 But do they know it?
01:47:40.000 Do they know it that they can't communicate right?
01:47:43.000 Yeah.
01:47:44.000 What's in their mind?
01:47:45.000 What's in that?
01:47:46.000 Well, I think there's spectrums.
01:47:47.000 There is a spectrum, rather.
01:47:49.000 I think there's a broad range of brain damage. 0.99
01:47:53.000 But I think a lot of them don't know what the fuck is going on. 0.99
01:47:56.000 That was the thing about the HBO football special. 0.99
01:47:58.000 They were talking about concussions.
01:48:01.000 They showed a lot of these guys later in their life, and they didn't know what was going on.
01:48:04.000 These poor guys were delirious.
01:48:06.000 Their wives would just guide them all around. 1.00
01:48:09.000 It was like they had a child they had to take care of.
01:48:14.000 So there's a broad range of trauma related. 0.99
01:48:17.000 Listen bro, with football I don't blame it all on the fucking head trauma. 0.99
01:48:23.000 I blame it on your body getting hit by a truck. 1.00
01:48:28.000 For fucking 10 years, you're getting hit by a truck. 1.00
01:48:33.000 Seven months of a year. 1.00
01:48:35.000 That's reality.
01:48:37.000 How much abuse can your spine take?
01:48:40.000 How much abuse can your organs take?
01:48:42.000 It depends if it's sexual abuse. 1.00
01:48:43.000 You know the fucking shots? 1.00
01:48:44.000 You know the shot that I'll give you if you're standing like this getting the ball? 1.00
01:48:48.000 You know when the guy grabs the ball and he gets it and I come from the fucking left or the right and I give you the kidney? 1.00
01:48:55.000 So I don't blame it all on the fucking head shots. 1.00
01:48:58.000 It's got to be a motherfucker to put your head down and to hit somebody. 1.00
01:49:02.000 Even when it doesn't, your spine, something's got to be... 0.99
01:49:04.000 And that controls, bro, that controls, you know, all the electrodes. 1.00
01:49:08.000 That controls all the shit in your fucking, your body, that little spine. 1.00
01:49:12.000 You know, I've told you many a times, the last two years before I stopped doing blow, at the end of the night, my fucking spine would hurt. 1.00
01:49:19.000 The top of my fucking neck would hurt. 0.99
01:49:21.000 It would give me a little voltage, like... 1.00
01:49:24.000 So I knew it was starting to fuck shit up and you can't talk. 0.97
01:49:27.000 I can't imagine, but I want to know if they know what they're going through. 0.98
01:49:31.000 I want to know if you sit them down and go, how do you feel?
01:49:34.000 And if they would say to you at times, I want to express myself, I can't.
01:49:39.000 Yeah, I'm sure they can't.
01:49:40.000 I'm sure that's exactly what they would tell you. 0.99
01:49:42.000 That's got to be a terrible fucking feeling, man. 0.99
01:49:45.000 It's got to be terrible. 1.00
01:49:46.000 I see somebody like Vinnie Curto, who I know, he's been punching the head 80 fucking times. 0.99
01:49:52.000 I could talk to Vinnie for hours. 0.98
01:49:54.000 I talked to him last week for like 45 minutes, and he'll go from scent to scent.
01:49:58.000 And it's amazing how he remembers certain things, and I'm very impressed by it.
01:50:02.000 But at the same time, when I hang up the phone with him, I'm sure that there's another thousand things that he's forgotten.
01:50:08.000 For the 20 that he's remembered, he's really forgotten a thousand.
01:50:11.000 So I might think he's sharp in that.
01:50:13.000 That's all he remembers is a handful of that stuff.
01:50:16.000 You get compromised.
01:50:18.000 There's a certain amount of compromise you're going to get if you're involved in kickboxing or contact sports or football.
01:50:27.000 Any time where you're getting head collisions over and over again, you're going to pay a price.
01:50:31.000 It's like how much of the price you're going to pay.
01:50:33.000 Is it just going to be like a weird little achy thing, like you might get a hurt wrist?
01:50:38.000 Is it going to be like that in your brain?
01:50:40.000 It's kind of annoying, but not that big a deal.
01:50:42.000 Is it going to be that, or is it going to be something really serious, where your mouth doesn't work right, or you can't formulate certain words, where you struggle to try to put together a sentence, and you forget what you were talking about right in the middle of the sentence, and you're not even high.
01:50:54.000 Thank you.
01:50:55.000 Thanks.
01:50:56.000 It's really weird how...
01:50:59.000 I know from two ways.
01:51:01.000 I know from riding a motorcycle and falling off and banging my head a few times.
01:51:06.000 I know from getting hit in the head a few times.
01:51:09.000 And I also know how you feel the next day. 1.00
01:51:12.000 You get hit in the fucking head when you're not used to it. 1.00
01:51:15.000 Not that you feel terrible, it's what you feel. 1.00
01:51:17.000 You do feel a darkness in your skull.
01:51:19.000 It feels dark.
01:51:20.000 It feels like there's no sun outside.
01:51:22.000 You know, when you get clocked in the head for a couple days and you see things.
01:51:25.000 That's a good way of putting it. 1.00
01:51:27.000 It's fucking crazy. 0.99
01:51:28.000 I know when I got clocked in the head, it scared the shit out of me. 0.99
01:51:30.000 You know, I survived. 0.85
01:51:31.000 I lived to tell the story. 1.00
01:51:32.000 I mean, fuck it, I'm here. 1.00
01:51:33.000 But you know that it's not right for you. 1.00
01:51:35.000 You said this.
01:51:36.000 You know that what I'm doing is not fucking healthy because this isn't normal for me to feel this way. 0.84
01:51:41.000 Yeah. 0.95
01:51:42.000 You know, it's not with the concussions.
01:51:43.000 It's not only the words and your memory.
01:51:48.000 It's also your mood. 1.00
01:51:49.000 It controls your fucking moods. 1.00
01:51:51.000 It controls whether or not you ice yourself or you fucking don't or how you live. 1.00
01:51:56.000 You know, that's all the shit that's in that. 1.00
01:51:58.000 Every brain, you know, I don't know what they are, but, you know, different. 0.99
01:52:02.000 Like somebody was saying that the front of the brain controls your anger.
01:52:05.000 And that the Buddhist belief for years, if you meditate through meditation, you could get through that part.
01:52:10.000 I'm just giving you an example. 0.97
01:52:11.000 But I think it affects a fucking lot of things. 0.95
01:52:13.000 Your mood and your depression or you... 0.94
01:52:15.000 It has to.
01:52:16.000 Yeah, it has to. 0.99
01:52:17.000 It fucking has to, man. 0.98
01:52:18.000 And that's why when they talk about football play... 0.99
01:52:20.000 Hey, bro, when...
01:52:21.000 Who kicks hard in the UFC? Crow Cop. 0.99
01:52:24.000 What do you think? 1.00
01:52:24.000 When Crow Cop kicks you in the fucking liver, you're not going to feel that for a couple of weeks and shit? 1.00
01:52:28.000 That's not going to do something? 1.00
01:52:29.000 To your insides. 0.86
01:52:31.000 Because you're kicking me over here. 0.93
01:52:32.000 It's got to borrow from something. 1.00
01:52:34.000 None of those fucking kicks got to do something to you. 0.99
01:52:36.000 That is a thing that people don't think about. 1.00
01:52:37.000 It's like the damage to your organs.
01:52:39.000 Jesus Christ! 1.00
01:52:40.000 Fuck yeah! 1.00
01:52:41.000 Impacts from whether football or kickboxing or whatever. 1.00
01:52:43.000 You've got to think about that.
01:52:45.000 Because you can't see it.
01:52:46.000 So you just assume everything's okay in there. 1.00
01:52:48.000 But you know, like someone's shin slamming into your ribcage and fucking rattling all your shit. 1.00
01:52:54.000 Full blast into your ribcage. 1.00
01:52:56.000 Really? 0.98
01:52:58.000 Jesus Christ.
01:52:59.000 How many of those can you take?
01:53:01.000 What's going on inside there? 1.00
01:53:04.000 How fucked up is everything? 0.99
01:53:06.000 On the NFL, we were in Pittsburgh. 1.00
01:53:08.000 I was watching that afternoon.
01:53:09.000 TV was on, trying to write, whatever.
01:53:11.000 And they were showing Earl Campbell.
01:53:13.000 And they were showing the best 10 power backs of all time.
01:53:16.000 And they showed Earl Campbell playing against some team.
01:53:19.000 And he had to play against something.
01:53:20.000 Solomon.
01:53:21.000 And they said, look at the shot that he gives him with.
01:53:23.000 And by mistake, he hit him with a knee in the solar plexus.
01:53:27.000 Think about it, right?
01:53:28.000 By mistake?
01:53:29.000 Like he went to tackle him and he tripped over a player's foot.
01:53:33.000 So the momentum and him coming around, the knee was right there.
01:53:36.000 Bam! 0.98
01:53:38.000 Bam! 0.98
01:53:38.000 I mean, you just seen it. 0.98
01:53:39.000 It was like him coming, Earl Campbell, and you're coming as the knee is coming up.
01:53:43.000 So he's falling as he's coming around.
01:53:46.000 Bam! 0.98
01:53:46.000 It was just, it was perfect. 0.98
01:53:47.000 You couldn't have fucking written this shit. 1.00
01:53:49.000 And this motherfucker, you just seen his arms go like this, bro. 1.00
01:53:54.000 Like everything. 1.00
01:53:55.000 Look at these.
01:53:56.000 Space cake.
01:53:57.000 Don't give him more.
01:53:59.000 What are you doing?
01:54:00.000 He can't take all this.
01:54:03.000 No one can take all this.
01:54:05.000 No, he just ate a whole bag of popcorn.
01:54:07.000 This is incredible. 1.00
01:54:09.000 Amateur shit. 1.00
01:54:12.000 When you call me crying in an hour from now, Joe Rogan, I want to talk to you. 1.00
01:54:17.000 Dana Dearman, we did this podcast the other day, and she ate a whole bag of that popcorn.
01:54:21.000 And by the end of it, she was so gone, she couldn't even...
01:54:24.000 I had to call her because I was so worried about her.
01:54:26.000 We stayed here for a bit until she came down.
01:54:30.000 Wow, yeah.
01:54:30.000 You've got to get someone some coffee or something, right?
01:54:32.000 What are you doing with that stone?
01:54:34.000 With that stone, you just got to ride it out.
01:54:36.000 There's nothing else.
01:54:37.000 You just got to ride it out.
01:54:38.000 It's like a piss test.
01:54:39.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:54:40.000 For you fucking amateurs, don't be playing with those edibles. 0.99
01:54:43.000 It's time. 1.00
01:54:44.000 Edibles are a danger, my friend.
01:54:46.000 That is not regular weed, folks.
01:54:48.000 That's not regular weed.
01:54:50.000 You gotta understand that.
01:54:51.000 It's gonna affect you a lot differently when you eat it.
01:54:54.000 I was just hungry. 0.99
01:54:57.000 I'm going to be talking to two fucking space cadets in about 40 minutes. 1.00
01:55:01.000 Fuck that! 1.00
01:55:02.000 Fuck that dog! 1.00
01:55:03.000 I haven't eaten an edible in a couple of days since Columbus. 1.00
01:55:06.000 So you just ate a whole bag of popcorn and one of those.
01:55:08.000 You're going to be crying in one hour.
01:55:09.000 Dude, remember those cookies that guy gave us in Columbus, Ohio and you ate them right before you went on stage?
01:55:15.000 Did you start feeling it while you were on stage?
01:55:18.000 I think I remember you saying something about it while you were on stage.
01:55:21.000 I felt it a little bit on some You know, whenever you eat an edible and you go on stage, you go to yoga, you go to jujitsu or whatever, the edible sits in you. 0.98
01:55:28.000 But once that adrenaline mixes with the edible, you've got a different type of fucking savage in there. 0.97
01:55:33.000 How about our friend that gave us those cookies in Chicago and you had a mild heart attack from them? 0.99
01:55:39.000 What?
01:55:39.000 What?
01:55:41.000 This was a couple years ago.
01:55:44.000 We did the one Chicago club that's very white.
01:55:47.000 Yeah, my 40th birthday.
01:55:50.000 And it was crazy. 1.00
01:55:51.000 This guy gave me these fucking cookies that were in a wrapper. 1.00
01:55:54.000 He brought them. 1.00
01:55:55.000 And I ate two of them.
01:55:57.000 They're life-changing cookies.
01:55:58.000 Oh, my God.
01:55:59.000 They were life-changing. 1.00
01:56:00.000 The next day, I had like an offbeat in my fucking heart. 0.99
01:56:04.000 I had like a heart murmur, you know? 1.00
01:56:05.000 Oh, shit. 0.99
01:56:06.000 Three days later, I went to the doctor. 1.00
01:56:07.000 They're like, yeah, you had something, dog. 1.00
01:56:09.000 What the fuck did you eat? 1.00
01:56:10.000 Oh, my God. 1.00
01:56:11.000 Like, you had a mild heart attack from a cookie.
01:56:13.000 I'm telling you, dude, they were not regular cookies.
01:56:15.000 I don't know what was going on.
01:56:16.000 No, no, I already ate them later.
01:56:17.000 I don't know what the guy did.
01:56:17.000 That dude put heroin in something.
01:56:19.000 He put, those weren't regular cookies.
01:56:21.000 There's a point...
01:56:23.000 There's a point where I could tell what you did.
01:56:25.000 There were these cookies I was eating for a while.
01:56:27.000 I'm not going to say from what place.
01:56:28.000 But I found out a year later that the dude was putting Valiums in them.
01:56:32.000 Now, I knew that these cookies were doing something to me.
01:56:36.000 I knew for a fact that these cookies were doing something to me that nothing else was doing.
01:56:41.000 I've been around the block, so I could feel it.
01:56:43.000 I know the difference between eating like a cookie.
01:56:45.000 So he knew that he was going to get people hooked on it. 0.99
01:56:47.000 He was saying, these are the strongest fucking things, guaranteed. 1.00
01:56:50.000 What an asshole. 1.00
01:56:52.000 I got a call one day. 1.00
01:56:53.000 Somebody went to the fucking hospital. 1.00
01:56:55.000 Oh, wow. 1.00
01:56:55.000 That's how he got busted. 1.00
01:56:56.000 What an asshole. 1.00
01:56:58.000 And the guy was like, bro, you don't have THC on you. 1.00
01:57:00.000 You can't be this asleep like this. 1.00
01:57:02.000 What an asshole. 1.00
01:57:04.000 Wow. 1.00
01:57:05.000 Well, that's the thing about having marijuana all shady and semi-legal the way it is, you know? 0.98
01:57:11.000 There's a lot of fucking disreputable folks who are going to get involved in this just to make money. 0.98
01:57:16.000 You know, think about, like, pot's good, man. 0.99
01:57:19.000 Yeah, pot's good, but when people are selling it, you're going to get people that are just trying to make money.
01:57:23.000 They're not like pot advocates, per se.
01:57:26.000 Some of them are just in the business to make money.
01:57:28.000 Listen, edible business, people don't stick around for that long. 1.00
01:57:31.000 Because you've got to put too much weed to kill motherfuckers in it. 1.00
01:57:34.000 Well, the whole thing is it's got to be a one-shot operation. 1.00
01:57:36.000 So it's got to be a store that buys three pounds, they trim it, and whatever they have left over, they make the edibles with it.
01:57:42.000 If you go in to buy weed to make edibles, you're going to lose money.
01:57:45.000 It's not going to work for you. 1.00
01:57:46.000 You make it from the trimmings and the fucking seeds and all the fucking stems, and that's how you do it. 1.00
01:57:51.000 That's how you do it? 1.00
01:57:52.000 That's to do it to be profitable.
01:57:54.000 Because it's one-stop shopping.
01:57:54.000 But it doesn't have the same impact?
01:57:56.000 What do you mean?
01:57:57.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:57:57.000 It's all the same strength.
01:57:58.000 It's all the same strength.
01:57:59.000 So the stems have the same amount of THC? Well, not the stems, but all the leaves and all that shit. 0.99
01:58:03.000 You put it with the butter and you still get the butter with the same high THC ratio. 0.98
01:58:07.000 Really?
01:58:07.000 From the leaves?
01:58:08.000 Yeah, it's the same from the leaves.
01:58:09.000 They trim it with the leaves.
01:58:10.000 That's all made from leaves, dog.
01:58:12.000 You know, when they tell you, oh yeah, what do you think, they take a beautiful bud and throw it in there?
01:58:15.000 They take the leaves, they trim it.
01:58:17.000 When you buy, okay, let me give you an example.
01:58:19.000 That grinder you have.
01:58:20.000 Right.
01:58:20.000 That grinder you have has two pieces.
01:58:22.000 It has a piece for the weed, and under the weed it has a piece for kush.
01:58:26.000 What does it call it?
01:58:27.000 Keith.
01:58:28.000 Keith.
01:58:28.000 Keith, okay.
01:58:29.000 See how much keef you got in there.
01:58:31.000 There's a lot.
01:58:32.000 Is there a lot?
01:58:33.000 Okay.
01:58:34.000 This is what you do.
01:58:35.000 When you go to a weed store now, before they give you that weed, they beat the keef off the weed.
01:58:40.000 They do?
01:58:41.000 That's how they sell keef. 0.91
01:58:43.000 You bring weed home from a weed store now, there's no keef on it.
01:58:48.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:58:49.000 You can get 25 a gram for that shit. 1.00
01:58:51.000 30 a gram for that shit. 1.00
01:58:52.000 The place next door is one of those schools that teaches you how to grow weed. 1.00
01:58:56.000 And you can have up to seven plants or something like that.
01:58:59.000 And they use their lighting.
01:59:02.000 And you just go a couple days a week or whatever to check on your plants.
01:59:05.000 It's kind of cool.
01:59:06.000 But they just bought an extraction machine.
01:59:10.000 And so now they can extract the weed into the weed juice.
01:59:14.000 It's all over.
01:59:16.000 Obama, I love you.
01:59:18.000 I love you, Obama.
01:59:20.000 Brandon next door showed me he has a syringe, and it's just a syringe of, like, liquid. 1.00
01:59:26.000 And you just drop it on a fucking bowl. 0.99
01:59:28.000 They're going to take it intravenously. 1.00
01:59:29.000 How long before someone takes that intravenously?
01:59:31.000 Oh, no, no, no, no.
01:59:33.000 It's a syringe just to drop, like, a little drip on your nugs.
01:59:36.000 Oh, I understand what you're saying, but I think, how long before someone takes that and shoves it into a vein?
01:59:41.000 Oh, totally.
01:59:41.000 Listen, in one year, you will not, smoking reefer will be obsolete.
01:59:46.000 One year?
01:59:47.000 In one year, 90...
01:59:49.000 60...
01:59:51.000 Smoke and reefer.
01:59:53.000 Smoke and reefer.
01:59:53.000 That's like 2012, Joey.
01:59:55.000 Smoke and reefer will be obsolete.
01:59:57.000 Really?
01:59:57.000 Between these things, because this is the first one.
02:00:00.000 That's predictions. 0.97
02:00:01.000 If this is the fucking first one, the next one's going to be half the size. 0.99
02:00:05.000 Right, okay. 1.00
02:00:06.000 And the next one's going to be in your fucking iPod. 1.00
02:00:08.000 You know what I'm saying? 1.00
02:00:09.000 I mean, you just have to assume.
02:00:10.000 Gentlemen, we just have to assume here.
02:00:12.000 Gentlemen... 1.00
02:00:13.000 If they're extracting fucking weed juice from weed, how long is it going to be until some motherfucker opens up a store and says, Joe Rogan, I'm going to put the shit you drink in the morning, and I'm going to mix it. 1.00
02:00:25.000 I don't take weed juice with that, which is all natural. 1.00
02:00:27.000 They're going to find out that weed juice mixed with the algae, the shit we drink in the morning, the shots. 0.97
02:00:34.000 It's going to be like that. 0.78
02:00:35.000 Well, you know that they say that when you juice weed or when you eat it, like you eat it like raw, it doesn't get you hot, but it's really good for your body.
02:00:43.000 Yes.
02:00:44.000 Super, really, super healthy.
02:00:45.000 Start getting ready.
02:00:46.000 In a year, this is going to be obsolete.
02:00:48.000 Yes, people are still going to smoke pot, but you're not going to have to.
02:00:52.000 You can just go to meet Joey.
02:00:53.000 Did you bring the dripper?
02:00:54.000 It's going to be like a Visine. 0.56
02:00:56.000 It's going to be the Visine thing. 0.99
02:00:57.000 You can control it.
02:00:58.000 Look what's going on with soda now.
02:01:00.000 You can make soda at home. 1.00
02:01:01.000 That's the dumbest shit in the whole entire world. 1.00
02:01:04.000 Is it any good? 1.00
02:01:05.000 It's disgusting.
02:01:06.000 You know when you go to a grocery store and it has the off-brand that's like 89 cents and it tastes like Coke but flatter or just not as good?
02:01:14.000 That's what it is.
02:01:15.000 And it makes no sense.
02:01:16.000 Is soda and pop really that expensive?
02:01:19.000 Where we have to make it at home?
02:01:21.000 I think the idea is you're supposed to be conserving somehow because, you know, you're recycling, using your own glasses. 1.00
02:01:27.000 It tastes like shit, though. 0.99
02:01:28.000 Now, what's the other thing they have? 1.00
02:01:30.000 The thing that you put in club soda or water?
02:01:35.000 I don't know.
02:01:36.000 You remember?
02:01:36.000 You could buy it.
02:01:37.000 It's like vitamin something.
02:01:38.000 You put it in your bottle of water.
02:01:41.000 I see a lot of people at the gyms.
02:01:43.000 Now, I'll tell you what. 1.00
02:01:44.000 I don't know about you motherfuckers, Joe Rogan. 0.99
02:01:46.000 I know you remember this. 0.99
02:01:46.000 Remember when we were kids, how salsa used to come? 0.99
02:01:50.000 Salsa never came like this.
02:01:51.000 Yeah, it came like a tank.
02:01:53.000 When you were a professional alcoholic, that's what you had at your house.
02:01:55.000 Remember New York Seltzer?
02:01:57.000 Whatever happened to that?
02:01:57.000 New York Seltzer.
02:01:58.000 Is that still around?
02:02:00.000 Yes and no, but it's got to be at Jewish delis only.
02:02:03.000 They don't have them at a lot of...
02:02:04.000 But it's so weird.
02:02:05.000 I remember when I was a kid, I'd go to Ray Canella's house and we'd get grape Kool-Aid and put salsa in it from that gun. 0.99
02:02:11.000 It was the best thing I ever tasted in my fucking life. 1.00
02:02:14.000 Kool-Aid with bubbles in that motherfucker? 1.00
02:02:16.000 Tremendous. 1.00
02:02:16.000 What's up? 1.00
02:02:17.000 Do you guys know that this is one of the craziest fucking stories ever, and I think we've talked about this on the podcast, I'm not sure, but that the cocaine, you know, cocaine used to be in Coca-Cola. 0.98
02:02:28.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 0.98
02:02:28.000 And the people in New Jersey take it out now, yeah, we talked about it. 0.98
02:02:31.000 Did we talk about it on the show?
02:02:32.000 Yeah.
02:02:33.000 How nutty is that that there's like billions of dollars in cocaine being made by a company that extracts it from the leaves they use to make Coca-Cola?
02:02:43.000 Cocaine never ends.
02:02:45.000 Like I said to you, it's the whole business.
02:02:47.000 Once you tap into the whole thing and you learn how to control it, like, all right, the cartel in the 80s, Pablo Escobar, those guys there.
02:02:55.000 When they were processing coke, that's what they were doing.
02:02:58.000 They weren't selling it.
02:03:00.000 They were getting it and selling a kilo for $6,000 and what you did was your business.
02:03:06.000 Okay?
02:03:06.000 That was how it started.
02:03:08.000 Then they said, wait a second.
02:03:10.000 We're going to become partners and get some of that from New York or wherever we're taking it from.
02:03:15.000 So instead of selling a key for $8,000 from now, we're going to get $16,000.
02:03:18.000 We're going to get 20% of their profits.
02:03:21.000 Okay?
02:03:22.000 And then they said, ooh, that's some good money too.
02:03:25.000 But they were paying people to transport it.
02:03:28.000 So I would come to Joe Rogan, Inc., and go, Joe Rogan, every week on Tuesday, you're going to transport 2,000 kilos at 5,000 a kilo.
02:03:38.000 Okay, that's it.
02:03:39.000 We're going to do that to you.
02:03:41.000 And then they did that.
02:03:42.000 Then Carlos laid there, got out of prison, and went to the cartel and said, this is what we're going to do. 0.99
02:03:46.000 I'm your new fucking partner at 50%. 0.99
02:03:48.000 You're going to process it. 1.00
02:03:49.000 You're going to do this.
02:03:50.000 I'm the one that's going to take it up to the state, sell it, set the pricing, control the routes.
02:03:55.000 He got the island off the coast, whatever, and he got the island there.
02:03:58.000 So now they ran it from A to Z. You follow me?
02:04:02.000 They controlled it from A to Z. They just weren't coke dealers no more. 0.99
02:04:05.000 The same thing's gonna happen with this weed.
02:04:07.000 The same thing is happening. 0.99
02:04:09.000 That these guys are getting a pound, they turn half of it into Keefe, they turn the other half into edible, and the other half they sell it 20 a fucking gram. 0.98
02:04:17.000 There's no loss in weed. 0.95
02:04:19.000 When they take the stems out now, they'll just throw that into mixing the edibles.
02:04:22.000 Did you hear about the weed they found floating in the ocean?
02:04:24.000 Oh, please.
02:04:24.000 But it's Mexican weed, so nobody cares about that.
02:04:28.000 I didn't hear about it.
02:04:28.000 Yeah, they found like billions of pounds of weed floating in the ocean.
02:04:32.000 Two tons or something like that.
02:04:34.000 Was it dumped from like a plane probably, I guess?
02:04:38.000 Could be, right?
02:04:39.000 They might have been running out of gas.
02:04:41.000 They had to toss it overboard.
02:04:42.000 But listen, we're growing the best weed right here.
02:04:44.000 Why is it even on the ocean?
02:04:46.000 So where was it coming from?
02:04:48.000 180 bales.
02:04:49.000 Oh my god.
02:04:50.000 8,000 pounds of weed. 1.00
02:04:53.000 Holy fucking shit. 1.00
02:04:56.000 180 bales of weed found floating in the ocean. 1.00
02:05:00.000 And what do they do about that?
02:05:01.000 Do they have to burn it now?
02:05:03.000 They take it, they put it somewhere, and when they do a big cookout, they'll burn it.
02:05:07.000 Well, listen, they have medical marijuana.
02:05:09.000 Why doesn't the government sell it?
02:05:10.000 We could use that money.
02:05:11.000 Well, first off, they found the bales.
02:05:12.000 How much water got into those bales?
02:05:15.000 Sell it cheap.
02:05:16.000 Let me tell you something. 1.00
02:05:17.000 I've smoked fucking weed that's been dried from bales in the early 80s. 0.99
02:05:21.000 Really? 1.00
02:05:21.000 Fucking horrible. 1.00
02:05:23.000 It tastes like salt water. 1.00
02:05:24.000 Oh, really? 1.00
02:05:24.000 It's fucking horrible. 1.00
02:05:26.000 The things explode, the seeds. 0.99
02:05:28.000 Listen, that weed's got seeds in it.
02:05:29.000 We don't want to do that.
02:05:30.000 We could use that for edibles.
02:05:32.000 But the thing with that weed is they'll take the how many bales?
02:05:35.000 180. By the time they burn those bales, the government gets to burn, there'll be 92 bales left.
02:05:40.000 Really?
02:05:41.000 You think they're trying to sell that stuff?
02:05:42.000 Oh, please. 0.99
02:05:43.000 So what about the salt water and all that shit? 1.00
02:05:46.000 Some poor soul will fucking smoke it. 1.00
02:05:48.000 Some poor soul in like North Dakota where you can't get good weed. 1.00
02:05:51.000 Some poor fucking brother that likes to smoke blunts and make videos at his house. 0.99
02:05:55.000 What's the hardest spot in the country to get weed? 1.00
02:05:58.000 Where's the hardest spot?
02:06:00.000 In front of the Capitol.
02:06:01.000 In front of the Capitol?
02:06:03.000 That might be the easiest. 1.00
02:06:05.000 I know you ain't gonna get no weed at the fucking White House. 1.00
02:06:07.000 I think you get weed everywhere. 1.00
02:06:09.000 I think now in this country it's wide open.
02:06:11.000 Could you go on the streets like the old days?
02:06:14.000 I think if you had to, yeah.
02:06:15.000 Hey, dude, pull up Penn Jillette's rant on Obama and weed. 0.99
02:06:21.000 Penn Jillette fucking nailed it. 1.00
02:06:24.000 You know, Penn Jillette has a podcast now on Sundays on Adam Carolla's network, and it's called Penn Sunday School, and he went on this rant about how fucked up it is that marijuana is illegal and that people are in jail for it, and one out of six people in jail are in jail for marijuana. 0.99
02:06:40.000 And he went on this fucking brilliant rant, man. 0.99
02:06:43.000 And it really is, it's a shame. 0.99
02:06:46.000 Like, what's going on right now?
02:06:49.000 Arresting people for marijuana?
02:06:50.000 With all the information we have about how we, you know, we know it's not dangerous. 0.97
02:06:54.000 We know the laws are ridiculous.
02:06:55.000 It's a real shame when you see people getting arrested for it.
02:06:59.000 And he makes this intense point about it.
02:07:02.000 You know prison is a business?
02:07:04.000 You know prison is a business, correct?
02:07:07.000 We know, our president has said...
02:07:10.000 In his own book, Dreams from My Father, 1995, before entering politics, he admitted that he'd used marijuana and maybe a little blow.
02:07:19.000 Maybe a little blow.
02:07:21.000 Which, as you know, is crazy talk.
02:07:25.000 Maybe a little blow is what someone who uses marijuana every weekend says. 0.95
02:07:30.000 If you used it once, you went, man, I used cocaine once, it was crazy.
02:07:34.000 But if you use it every weekend, you go, maybe a little blow?
02:07:37.000 That's true.
02:07:38.000 That's such an odd, casual way to say, maybe a little.
02:07:44.000 He has not left this to states' rights.
02:07:46.000 As you know, medical marijuana, as our good friend Joe Rogan will point out to you any time, medical marijuana you can get in California.
02:07:56.000 And the feds are coming in to try to stop this.
02:07:58.000 They're still arresting people, yeah. 0.98
02:07:59.000 States' rights don't mean jack shit to the Obama administration on anything except gay marriage. 0.97
02:08:09.000 What troubles me about this is, and it is not hypocrisy, because as everybody knows, hypocrisy doesn't bother me very much. 0.99
02:08:17.000 Yeah, you like hypocrisy. 0.80
02:08:18.000 And so Obama... 0.97
02:08:19.000 And yet you feel this is worse? 0.88
02:08:21.000 I think it's beyond hypocrisy.
02:08:23.000 I think it's something to do with class.
02:08:26.000 A lot of people have accused Obama of class warfare, but in the wrong direction.
02:08:31.000 I believe this is Obama chortling with Jimmy Fallon about lower class people.
02:08:38.000 Do we believe, even for a second, anybody believe, that if Obama had been busted for marijuana under the laws that he condones, Would his life have been better?
02:08:52.000 If Obama had been caught with the marijuana that he says he uses, and maybe a little blow, blow, cocaine, blow, this casual attitude toward drugs, a casual attitude toward drugs that makes him really cool!
02:09:10.000 On Jimmy Fallon.
02:09:12.000 Makes him the hip president.
02:09:14.000 I'm the cool president.
02:09:15.000 I'm the happy and happiest president.
02:09:16.000 I say weed.
02:09:18.000 I say blow.
02:09:19.000 It's all a big deal.
02:09:20.000 Ha ha ha.
02:09:21.000 Huge laugh from the college students. 0.99
02:09:24.000 And if he had been busted under his laws, he would have done hard fucking time. 0.97
02:09:31.000 And if he had done time in prison, time in federal prison, time for his weed and a little blow, he would not be president of the United States of America. 0.99
02:09:43.000 And he would not have gone to his fancy-ass college.
02:09:47.000 He would not have sold books that sold millions and millions of copies and made millions and millions of dollars.
02:09:53.000 He would not have a beautiful, smart, Wife. 0.99
02:09:57.000 He would not have a great job. 1.00
02:09:59.000 He would have been in fucking prison. 1.00
02:10:02.000 And it's not a goddamn joke. 1.00
02:10:05.000 People who smoke marijuana must be set free. 0.99
02:10:09.000 It is insane to lock people up.
02:10:11.000 Now, people bust me all the time for carrying on about how I've never had a sip of alcohol, never had a puff of marijuana, never done any drugs in my life.
02:10:20.000 They say, why do you always bring that up?
02:10:22.000 Well, maybe in this case it's okay to bring it up, okay?
02:10:25.000 I've never had a puff of marijuana.
02:10:28.000 I've never had maybe a little blow.
02:10:30.000 I've never even had a glass of wine.
02:10:33.000 Alright? 1.00
02:10:34.000 None of that shit. 0.99
02:10:35.000 But the people who do any of this stuff... 1.00
02:10:39.000 Do not deserve to be in prison.
02:10:42.000 Throw some numbers at me, Godot.
02:10:44.000 750,000 people in jail for victimless crimes, a great number of which are marijuana.
02:10:51.000 One in six people in jail are there for marijuana.
02:10:54.000 Not one in six people of victimless crimes.
02:10:56.000 No, one in six is there for marijuana.
02:10:58.000 One in six people in prison.
02:10:59.000 One in six people in prison.
02:11:02.000 It's a brilliant rant.
02:11:03.000 One in six people in prison are in there for a week.
02:11:07.000 I just love the rant, and if you want to listen to Pendula, it's Sunday School. 0.99
02:11:11.000 He's fucking amazing. 0.97
02:11:12.000 I want to meet him so bad. 0.99
02:11:14.000 We didn't figure this out 10 years ago.
02:11:16.000 I know, but come on, that's a great rant, Joe Diaz. 1.00
02:11:18.000 I'm wasting my time with this shit. 1.00
02:11:19.000 I'm wasting your time? 1.00
02:11:20.000 I came here to talk to you, though.
02:11:23.000 You know me, Doug.
02:11:24.000 Well, we're talking to you.
02:11:25.000 I'm talking to you right now.
02:11:26.000 Talking to me about...
02:11:27.000 It's a business. 1.00
02:11:28.000 What the fuck do you want? 1.00
02:11:29.000 Nobody knows prison's a business. 1.00
02:11:30.000 That's what it is. 1.00
02:11:31.000 It's a fucking business, guys. 0.99
02:11:32.000 It's important when a guy like Penn Jillette is a high profile guy. 0.99
02:11:35.000 You do for... 1.00
02:11:36.000 You break the fucking law. 1.00
02:11:37.000 You go to jail. 1.00
02:11:38.000 You sell weed against the law and 10 bales.
02:11:41.000 You get caught.
02:11:41.000 You go to jail.
02:11:42.000 I went to jail.
02:11:44.000 I'm responsible. 1.00
02:11:45.000 I learned how to fucking... 0.99
02:11:46.000 That's it. 1.00
02:11:46.000 What are you going to do? 1.00
02:11:47.000 There's a law. 0.99
02:11:48.000 You cannot fucking do it. 1.00
02:11:49.000 You're going to go to jail. 1.00
02:11:51.000 Jail and prison are a fucking business. 1.00
02:11:53.000 They're a business. 1.00
02:11:55.000 That's why...
02:11:56.000 Get a ticket driving with the phone.
02:11:58.000 How much they tell you it is?
02:12:00.000 How much they tell you it is?
02:12:01.000 I don't know.
02:12:01.000 $25.
02:12:02.000 Until you go down to LA County and it's $225.
02:12:06.000 Because you've got to pay the court costs, the prison fee, the judge's vacation. 0.99
02:12:10.000 It's a fucking business, guys. 1.00
02:12:12.000 They're going to raise the taxes now for fucking parking tickets. 1.00
02:12:16.000 It's a business. 1.00
02:12:17.000 What the fuck do you want me to do? 0.99
02:12:18.000 This is the oldest conversation in the book. 1.00
02:12:21.000 They should have legalized this after they shot Kennedy.
02:12:23.000 They didn't. 0.98
02:12:24.000 We're fucking fortunate that we live in California and we don't have to abide by this. 0.92
02:12:29.000 When was the last time you were at a store and they kicked the door down, Joe Rogan? 0.95
02:12:32.000 How about you, my friend? 0.99
02:12:33.000 So all this shit you guys talk about them kicking the doors, the feds, I've never seen it. 0.99
02:12:37.000 I go get weed every day. 1.00
02:12:39.000 Stop scaring these fucking white kids and getting them talking. 1.00
02:12:42.000 This is nonsense. 1.00
02:12:43.000 This is nonsense talk.
02:12:44.000 The day should come to jail.
02:12:46.000 I never drank.
02:12:47.000 So what? 0.99
02:12:48.000 So who gives a fuck? 0.99
02:12:49.000 It applies for everything, dog. 0.99
02:12:51.000 There's a lot of people who are in jail that get out every day on a DNA or whatever.
02:12:55.000 You break the law.
02:12:56.000 You sell five pounds of weed.
02:12:57.000 You got to go to jail.
02:12:58.000 It's a business.
02:12:59.000 You didn't do nothing wrong, but it's a business.
02:13:01.000 They have guidelines. 0.99
02:13:02.000 If you get caught with 30, 28 grams of blow, you have to do a certain amount of fucking time. 0.99
02:13:08.000 You get caught with a quarter ounce of weed, you have to do a certain amount of time. 0.99
02:13:11.000 You got caught with it.
02:13:12.000 Why are you crying to me for?
02:13:13.000 You got caught with.
02:13:14.000 I was a criminal for 30 years.
02:13:15.000 You ever see me get caught with blow?
02:13:17.000 With weed or blow?
02:13:18.000 No.
02:13:19.000 You follow me?
02:13:19.000 There's a way to do it and there's a way.
02:13:21.000 Now, how the fuck are you going to get caught with fucking weed and not think you're going to go to jail if you live in fucking Ohio or in fucking Kentucky or wherever? 1.00
02:13:28.000 You're going to go to jail. 1.00
02:13:29.000 I kind of see your point, but I also see his.
02:13:33.000 Because it's an important man.
02:13:34.000 It's brilliant, I know.
02:13:35.000 It's important.
02:13:36.000 It's not?
02:13:37.000 We got together with Fallon and the President's hip or whatever. 1.00
02:13:39.000 I don't give a fuck, dog. 1.00
02:13:40.000 You don't give a fuck at all? 1.00
02:13:41.000 I'm smoking. 1.00
02:13:42.000 Look, look, here.
02:13:42.000 Here's what I think about your whole drug thing.
02:13:44.000 Look, like the same thing I've rubbed my balls with for the last 32 years with the sativas and the bullshit. 1.00
02:13:49.000 Just get high, dog. 1.00
02:13:51.000 LAUGHTER You people had too much drama to the gift that God gave us again, huh?
02:13:57.000 You had too much drama. 0.98
02:13:58.000 I killed it.
02:13:59.000 I gotta put a thing at the end of the joint to be cool. 1.00
02:14:01.000 Meanwhile, you're smoking on a fucking electronic cigarette. 1.00
02:14:04.000 Shut the fuck up. 1.00
02:14:05.000 You're smoking an electronic cigarette. 1.00
02:14:06.000 But I'm smoking!
02:14:08.000 Think about that.
02:14:09.000 I'm smoking.
02:14:10.000 That's all that matters.
02:14:11.000 At the end of the week, that's all that matters. 0.99
02:14:13.000 Fucking people want to be intelligent all the time. 0.97
02:14:15.000 I can't wait to see you on stage tonight. 1.00
02:14:17.000 The fucking stupidity. 1.00
02:14:18.000 You're in rare form today. 1.00
02:14:20.000 One out of six people.
02:14:22.000 And three out of four people in there for rape and murder. 0.99
02:14:25.000 What are you telling me for?
02:14:26.000 Joey Meatballs, calm down. 1.00
02:14:27.000 Who gives a fuck? 1.00
02:14:28.000 Who gives a fuck? 1.00
02:14:29.000 To show people that you give a fuck. 1.00
02:14:31.000 Who gives a fuck? 1.00
02:14:32.000 I don't give a fuck. 1.00
02:14:32.000 I give a fuck. 1.00
02:14:33.000 I don't want people locked up in jail for weed. 1.00
02:14:36.000 You know my favorite thing, Joe? 0.99
02:14:37.000 What if they came in here jackboot thug style and fucking haul you away for your little fancy pencil? 0.99
02:14:42.000 I've been doing a comedian for 20 years. 0.99
02:14:43.000 I drink from time to time.
02:14:45.000 Do I ever get behind of a car when I'm drunk and get a DUI? That's a choice you make.
02:14:49.000 These are all the choices you make, bro.
02:14:53.000 What are we getting at?
02:14:54.000 I know it's illegal.
02:14:55.000 I know it should be legal.
02:14:56.000 And I know that John Leonard's going to make a comeback.
02:15:00.000 But for today.
02:15:00.000 What?
02:15:01.000 But for today.
02:15:02.000 2000. For today.
02:15:04.000 But for today. 1.00
02:15:05.000 If you get caught smoking fucking in New York, you're going to jail. 1.00
02:15:09.000 I don't care what you said, bro. 1.00
02:15:10.000 I love hearing you talk.
02:15:11.000 I know. 1.00
02:15:12.000 Fuck. 1.00
02:15:12.000 I'm going to put up with this nonsense. 1.00
02:15:14.000 I love pendulum. 1.00
02:15:16.000 But I don't give a fuck. 1.00
02:15:16.000 I was going off yesterday. 1.00
02:15:18.000 I was saying how Joey Diaz would get mad about ketchup.
02:15:21.000 About... 0.99
02:15:22.000 Because everybody wants to hang up with this fucking Heinz ketchup. 1.00
02:15:25.000 Or ranch. 0.99
02:15:26.000 Have you ever talked about ranch? 1.00
02:15:27.000 Oh, I fucking hate ranch. 1.00
02:15:29.000 I don't know how the fuck people can eat that shit. 1.00
02:15:31.000 I don't know how people can eat ranch. 1.00
02:15:33.000 When I go to a place and I say, oh, you have wings, and they say it comes with ranch, I get up and leave, even if I don't get the wings.
02:15:40.000 Because if you're going to serve wings with ranch, I don't want to do business with you.
02:15:44.000 I don't want to do business with you.
02:15:46.000 I'm very easy. 0.99
02:15:47.000 I'm very fucking easy. 0.99
02:15:49.000 If you fuck up pork fried rice, what do we got to talk about? 1.00
02:15:52.000 Wings must be done with blue cheese? 0.99
02:15:54.000 Blue cheese.
02:15:54.000 Yeah, like the way they invented in Buffalo, New York.
02:15:56.000 If you're going to do something original, do an original. 0.99
02:15:58.000 You're going to show up with that ranch that smells like somebody's ass. 0.99
02:16:01.000 They're saying that ranch is starting to replace ketchup. 0.99
02:16:04.000 Yeah, that's good. 1.00
02:16:05.000 If you're a fucking hillbilly and you want to taste the ass in your mouth all fucking day. 1.00
02:16:09.000 I hate that fucking ranch shit. 1.00
02:16:11.000 Don't put it close to me. 1.00
02:16:12.000 Don't put it around me. 1.00
02:16:14.000 It's either blue cheese with wings or go fuck your mother. 1.00
02:16:17.000 That's the next shirt. 1.00
02:16:18.000 Alright, please. 1.00
02:16:21.000 You're going to give me a fucking ranch with fucking wings. 1.00
02:16:24.000 I can say it. 1.00
02:16:25.000 Blue cheese with wings and you're going to fuck your mother. 1.00
02:16:28.000 Go fuck your mother. 1.00
02:16:29.000 I don't need this shit. 1.00
02:16:30.000 You're going to give me ranch with my wings. 1.00
02:16:32.000 That's the next shirt.
02:16:33.000 That's the next shirt.
02:16:36.000 Let's see the blue cheese with wings. 1.00
02:16:39.000 Fuck it. 1.00
02:16:40.000 He's fucked up now. 1.00
02:16:43.000 He's eating blue cheese with wings and you go fuck your mother. 1.00
02:16:45.000 Fucking going to give me ranch and shit. 1.00
02:16:49.000 How many people around me order a ranch? 1.00
02:16:51.000 Don't order that shit around me. 1.00
02:16:52.000 Do me a favor. 1.00
02:16:53.000 Ladies and gentlemen, this fucking podcast is over. 0.99
02:16:57.000 I gotta go and do David Tell's, Dave's Old Porn show today. 0.99
02:17:03.000 So, we got a show tonight at the Ice House.
02:17:05.000 It's not quite sold out, but it's really close.
02:17:09.000 I need two tickets for Jay from...
02:17:11.000 That week.
02:17:11.000 Oh, sweet.
02:17:13.000 There's only like ten left.
02:17:14.000 Two tickets.
02:17:15.000 Cool.
02:17:15.000 But it's icehousecomedy.com is the website.
02:17:17.000 You can buy tickets online.
02:17:19.000 The lineup tonight is spectacular.
02:17:21.000 It is Mad Flavor, a.k.a. 0.99
02:17:23.000 Joey motherfucking Diaz. 0.99
02:17:24.000 Brian Redband, a.k.a. 0.99
02:17:27.000 Rykel, if you're looking to give him something with a social security number intact. 0.99
02:17:31.000 Doug Benson is going to be all up in this bitch. 1.00
02:17:34.000 Ari Shaffir just texted me and said he's going to make it down. 0.99
02:17:37.000 Are you serious?
02:17:37.000 Yes.
02:17:39.000 He'll squeeze in.
02:17:40.000 And Dom Irera is coming down. 1.00
02:17:42.000 This fucking show is going to be off the chain. 1.00
02:17:45.000 Off the chain. 1.00
02:17:47.000 There's no way it's too many people.
02:17:49.000 It's perfect.
02:17:50.000 It's beautiful. 0.99
02:17:51.000 We're going to ride this bitch right into the beach. 1.00
02:17:54.000 That's done. 1.00
02:17:55.000 That's done.
02:17:56.000 You shouldn't even invite anybody. 0.99
02:17:57.000 We're going to have a great fucking show tonight. 0.99
02:17:59.000 Whoever comes down, we're going to have a great show. 0.99
02:18:00.000 And we will also be broadcasting a podcast simultaneously.
02:18:04.000 We'll start before the podcast.
02:18:06.000 We say it starts at 9. It really doesn't start until like 9.30.
02:18:09.000 But 9-ish, in case we get crazy.
02:18:11.000 And if you're bored and you're in front, just leave it on.
02:18:14.000 And you'll find out what time it starts.
02:18:15.000 So that is called the Ice House Chronicles.
02:18:18.000 And you can watch it live on Ustream with the same channel, the Joe Rogan channel on Ustream.
02:18:23.000 But if you want to download the podcast, you have to get it from either iTunes or DeathSquad.tv.
02:18:30.000 And DeathSquad.tv is all of Brian's podcasts that he produces.
02:18:34.000 He's got a gang of them online.
02:18:38.000 And they're eventually going to be broken up into separate feeds now, right?
02:18:41.000 Is that how you're doing that?
02:18:42.000 Yeah, some of the main shows are already on separate feeds on iTunes.
02:18:46.000 But, yeah, we have, you know, Doug Benson's been stopping by a lot.
02:18:50.000 He's been on the last two XXX squads.
02:18:52.000 And, you know, we have Muff said we had the vice or the guy that's behind Call of Duty on the last one.
02:18:59.000 We should be all on DeskWad Network.
02:19:02.000 We should all figure out a way to get ourselves all together on a website or something.
02:19:06.000 Let's do something where we're all in this thing.
02:19:08.000 You know what I mean?
02:19:09.000 We've been following a lot for three years.
02:19:10.000 But we have to figure out how to do this.
02:19:11.000 I know.
02:19:12.000 We really all should be together.
02:19:14.000 We'll figure out how to organize it.
02:19:17.000 Just to, you know, like...
02:19:19.000 We need to at least have a page on our website, like these are all the people that we associate with.
02:19:25.000 Desk Squad, honorary Desk Squad, you know we have like official Desk Squad, honorary Desk Squad, close associates, familiars, right?
02:19:34.000 Should we label these things?
02:19:36.000 Well, I'm trying to do that on Death Squad right now.
02:19:38.000 I'm going to make like a link page thing on, you know, like what you were talking about with the grid and stuff like that.
02:19:43.000 I just need help with WordPress.
02:19:45.000 Yeah, beautiful.
02:19:46.000 We'll hire somebody.
02:19:47.000 We need to hire somebody.
02:19:48.000 Yeah, so if you're a super master at WordPress, like you're just a badass.
02:19:52.000 If you've got some wicked websites, get a hold of Redband.
02:19:55.000 Get Redband at...
02:19:56.000 Redband at Gmail.
02:19:57.000 Redband at Gmail.
02:19:58.000 Holler. 0.81
02:19:59.000 Wait for the wave of crazy.
02:20:00.000 Because here it comes.
02:20:01.000 All caps. 1.00
02:20:02.000 You fucking pussy. 1.00
02:20:03.000 Fuck your mother. 1.00
02:20:05.000 Just serious people. 1.00
02:20:06.000 You have to have a portfolio and everything.
02:20:08.000 Don't be mean.
02:20:09.000 And don't be mean.
02:20:09.000 Now, serious inquiries tomorrow night.
02:20:11.000 I'm with these guys tonight.
02:20:12.000 I'll be at the Irvine Improv tomorrow night.
02:20:15.000 8 o'clock show.
02:20:16.000 949-854-5455.
02:20:19.000 That's tomorrow night.
02:20:20.000 Irvine Improv.
02:20:21.000 Thursday night.
02:20:22.000 I want to thank the people of Columbus, Cleveland, and Pittsburgh. 1.00
02:20:24.000 You motherfuckers are bad to the bone. 1.00
02:20:26.000 I'll see you motherfuckers in Buffalo on June 21st. 1.00
02:20:29.000 How about New York, man? 1.00
02:20:29.000 New York was fucking amazing. 1.00
02:20:31.000 I'm going to play this for you because you haven't even seen this. 0.99
02:20:36.000 This is you going on stage in New York.
02:20:39.000 I saved this.
02:20:40.000 I played this for Dom Herrera last night.
02:20:42.000 We both just sat and listened to it in my car with our mouse dropped.
02:20:46.000 Because this is you going on stage.
02:20:50.000 This isn't Coldplay.
02:20:51.000 This is Joey Diaz.
02:20:52.000 Listen to this.
02:20:53.000 Ready?
02:20:54.000 You got standing o's at all our shows.
02:20:56.000 No, people know what we're doing.
02:20:57.000 Listen to this.
02:20:58.000 I'm very proud.
02:20:59.000 That was one.
02:21:05.000 That's New York.
02:21:07.000 No, you're getting on.
02:21:12.000 Joe, he hasn't even introduced you. 0.99
02:21:14.000 They're walking on stage right now and they're going fucking bananas. 0.89
02:21:16.000 You try to calm them down. 0.99
02:21:26.000 Wow.
02:21:27.000 And that's me going, wow. 0.99
02:21:29.000 That's fucking amazing. 0.99
02:21:30.000 That's sweet. 1.00
02:21:31.000 Now, I love you motherfuckers. 1.00
02:21:32.000 You're coming out. 1.00
02:21:33.000 You're supporting us.
02:21:34.000 We're getting better and better.
02:21:35.000 And I told you the dream. 0.99
02:21:37.000 By the end of the year, we're taking over this motherfucker once and for all. 0.99
02:21:40.000 New Year's, December 12th, we'll be ready for the Martians, whoever's showing up. 1.00
02:21:44.000 Yeah, whoever's showing up. 1.00
02:21:45.000 I don't give a fuck anymore. 1.00
02:21:46.000 We're taking it. 0.99
02:21:47.000 Yeah, we're thinking about starting compounds.
02:21:49.000 We're going to make our own tax-deductible religion.
02:21:52.000 Dog, I put the documentary out.
02:21:54.000 It's selling like hotcakes.
02:21:55.000 If you donate it, if you bought it, I give my heart to you.
02:21:58.000 Thank you very much.
02:21:59.000 How do they find any of your stuff?
02:22:01.000 This one's on Payloads, the documentary, but we'll put it on iTunes next week.
02:22:04.000 So once it's on iTunes, I'll blow it up on Twitter and Facebook.
02:22:08.000 Is your CD still number one on iTunes?
02:22:10.000 It's number 11. It went down.
02:22:11.000 God damn it! 0.99
02:22:13.000 That thing went down from 1 to like 92. It went down like Brendan Schaub in Brazil. 1.00
02:22:18.000 You follow me down hard.
02:22:19.000 And what is it called again? 1.00
02:22:21.000 It's either you or the motherfucking priest, but you know what? 1.00
02:22:23.000 No, not the motherfucking priest. 1.00
02:22:24.000 Just you or the priest, right? 1.00
02:22:25.000 It's either you or the priest.
02:22:26.000 It's either you or the priest.
02:22:27.000 I'm sorry.
02:22:28.000 We're going to bring it back up, Joey.
02:22:30.000 We're going to bring it back up today. 0.98
02:22:31.000 The documentary is where I got my balls from. 0.86
02:22:34.000 It's five bucks on payloads. 0.72
02:22:36.000 I appreciate everything you guys do.
02:22:38.000 Where I got my balls from is the documentary, and that's on payloads?
02:22:41.000 That's on payloads only. 0.96
02:22:42.000 How do you say that?
02:22:42.000 P-A-Y-L-O-A-D-Z dot com.
02:22:47.000 Powerful. 1.00
02:22:48.000 I love you motherfuckers. 1.00
02:22:49.000 And if they want to follow you on Twitter, it's Mad Flavor. 1.00
02:22:52.000 Mad Flavor.
02:22:53.000 Come to Facebook, too.
02:22:54.000 Whatever.
02:22:54.000 We got subscribers.
02:22:55.000 At least you get to hear the shit I'm talking about. 1.00
02:22:57.000 I love you, Joe. 0.99
02:22:58.000 I love you, Red Band.
02:23:00.000 You know what, man?
02:23:01.000 I lost a link.
02:23:02.000 Every time I press...
02:23:03.000 It went away.
02:23:04.000 I didn't go on there for so long.
02:23:05.000 It just told me. 0.99
02:23:06.000 They threw me out of the fucking thing, you know? 0.99
02:23:09.000 We would be back. 1.00
02:23:10.000 Tonight.
02:23:11.000 Tonight for the Ice House Chronicles and tomorrow with Wildman Bert Kreischer. 1.00
02:23:16.000 Oh, shit. 1.00
02:23:16.000 Oh, shit. 1.00
02:23:17.000 We love you. 1.00
02:23:18.000 Oh, shit. 1.00
02:23:18.000 We love you. 1.00
02:23:18.000 We love you guys. 1.00
02:23:19.000 Thank you.
02:23:20.000 Is it?
02:23:33.000 Okay, I forgot to thank our sponsors, ladies and gentlemen.
02:23:36.000 First of all, I'd like to thank unsolicited sponsors.
02:23:38.000 Defense Soap is a soap company that I use for grappling. 0.99
02:23:42.000 It's got like tea tree oil and all these probiotics, and it keeps you from getting mad herpes and nasty shit. 0.99
02:23:48.000 That's a thing that happens. 0.98
02:23:49.000 You get scratched up when you do jiu-jitsu.
02:23:51.000 You can get ringworm, and people don't know about that stuff.
02:23:54.000 You can even get staph infection, and people get really sick from it.
02:23:56.000 It's very dangerous.
02:23:58.000 And the way to keep your skin healthy is twofold.
02:24:00.000 One, probiotics.
02:24:01.000 Take acidophilus.
02:24:03.000 Very important.
02:24:04.000 Kombucha tea is another good probiotic.
02:24:06.000 But anything probiotic, that's very important.
02:24:09.000 But acidophilus is a really strong one.
02:24:11.000 It keeps ringworm dead.
02:24:13.000 And then two, use natural soap that doesn't fuck with the natural pH balance of your skin.
02:24:18.000 You don't want to use antibacterial soap because that stuff actually kills the good bacteria as well.
02:24:23.000 And what defense soap is, it has tea tree oil in it and all sorts of different eucalyptus, all sorts of different natural oils that are good for keeping the healthy flora of your skin safe from nasty cooties.
02:24:36.000 So that's DefenseSoap.com.
02:24:38.000 That's unsolicited. 1.00
02:24:39.000 That shit's for free. 1.00
02:24:40.000 And C2O Coconut Water, another unsolicited one because those guys are the shit. 1.00
02:24:44.000 Those guys are the shit. 1.00
02:24:45.000 And I have replaced C2O as Gatorade. 1.00
02:24:48.000 I used to be a big Gatorade guy after a night of drinking or just whatever when I'm dehydrated.
02:24:53.000 Joey said it went sour, but I've yet to see this.
02:24:56.000 I will take all his C2O and drink it.
02:24:59.000 Thanks to The Fleshlight for sponsoring us.
02:25:02.000 Go to JoeRogan.net and click on the link for The Fleshlight.
02:25:04.000 Enter in the code name Rogan and save yourself 15% off with the number one sex toy for men.
02:25:08.000 And thanks to Onnit.com. 0.98
02:25:10.000 That's O-N-N-I-T. Makers of Alpha Brand, which I took before the show, which is why I'm so motherfucking eloquent. 0.97
02:25:18.000 Shroom Tech Sport, Shroom Tech Immune, 5-HTP Enhanced New Mood. 0.99
02:25:22.000 Go check all that shit out at Onnit.com. 0.99
02:25:25.000 O-N-N-I-T.com. 0.99
02:25:26.000 Use the code name ROGAN and save 10% off any and all orders from now until you stop ordering.
02:25:33.000 We are done.
02:25:34.000 Hold on.
02:25:34.000 One more shout out.
02:25:37.000 BallCancerSucks.com.
02:25:38.000 Go to the webpage. 0.96
02:25:39.000 Check your nut sack.
02:25:41.000 Order a t-shirt.
02:25:41.000 Put in B&B.20.
02:25:43.000 You're 20% off the t-shirt.
02:25:45.000 They're my new sponsors.
02:25:45.000 I love them.
02:25:46.000 Beautiful.
02:25:47.000 Get your ball sacks checked.
02:25:48.000 And go check out Joey's podcast.
02:25:49.000 Yeah.
02:25:50.000 Beauty and the Beast. 0.99
02:25:51.000 And go check out fucking NoHor Organic and get yourself your little fucking Eureka. 1.00
02:25:55.000 Boom. 1.00
02:25:56.000 Sherlock, Sherlock, boom.
02:25:57.000 And buy a Death Squad shirt at DeathSquad.tv.
02:25:59.000 Yeah.
02:25:59.000 DeathSquad.tv.
02:26:01.000 All right.
02:26:01.000 We love you guys.