The Joe Rogan Experience - Joe Rogan Experience #2389 - Sal Vulcano

00:00:01.000 Joe Rogan podcast, check it out.

00:00:03.000 The Joe.

00:00:04.000 Logan experience.

00:00:06.000 Train by day, Joe Relogan podcast by night.

00:00:09.000 All day.

00:00:11.000 Yep.

00:00:13.000 What's up?

00:00:14.000 What was the last time I saw you?

00:00:15.000 It was I was here promoting my special uh man, it was uh June of last year.

00:00:21.000 Damn, time flies.

00:00:23.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:00:23.000 A fucking whole year.

00:00:26.000 Oh my goodness.

00:00:27.000 Congratulations.

00:00:28.000 Thank you, dude.

00:00:28.000 Look at you out there breeding.

00:00:29.000 Right.

00:00:30.000 A tribute to the population.

00:00:31.000 How old are you?

00:00:33.000 Um 40.

00:00:34.000 I'll be 49 in November.

00:00:35.000 So did you do the math like when your kids are 20?

00:00:38.000 Bro, I I've done every math.

00:00:39.000 Every piece of math you could do.

00:00:41.000 It's pretty healthy.

00:00:42.000 Yeah.

00:00:42.000 No, I am.

00:00:43.000 That's exactly what happened.

00:00:44.000 I started with a trainer four weeks ago.

00:00:47.000 And uh and and just did all this blood work and taking all these scans and tests and stuff now just because I'm like, I have to I have to be here as long as possible.

00:00:56.000 It changes the game when you have children.

00:00:58.000 Yeah.

00:00:58.000 You can fuck off and do coke and heroin and fucking sleep.

00:01:02.000 Yeah.

00:01:02.000 Luckily I wasn't doing that.

00:01:04.000 No, but you as soon as you have a kid, you're like, oh my God, I want to leave my kid.

00:01:07.000 I was eating because of whatever cereal.

00:01:11.000 I was like backing out of the driver without looking, but like now.

00:01:15.000 Most of my Instagram algorithm is things that I shouldn't eat.

00:01:18.000 Yeah.

00:01:19.000 It's like sandwiches, sandwiches and pizza.

00:01:21.000 You have trouble with that stuff?

00:01:23.000 No.

00:01:23.000 No, not at all.

00:01:24.000 No, I don't have trouble.

00:01:25.000 Yeah.

00:01:25.000 I just know it's not good for you.

00:01:27.000 Yeah.

00:01:27.000 Most mostly I eat good stuff.

00:01:29.000 What's what what's what's like a you yeah, you're like an like a like an egg white.

00:01:34.000 No, I eat yolks.

00:01:36.000 Okay.

00:01:36.000 Yolks are the healthy part.

00:01:37.000 Yolks.

00:01:38.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:01:38.000 Yeah, I eat the whole egg.

00:01:39.000 But I have chickens.

00:01:40.000 So what you're fresh eggs.

00:01:42.000 Are you like a like do you have like a diet like an Olympic?

00:01:44.000 Like are you like an Olympian?

00:01:46.000 No.

00:01:46.000 Are you like weighing your food and like no no no no no no no?

00:01:49.000 I eat way too much.

00:01:50.000 If I weighed my food, I'd be like, I eat for a 300-pound man.

00:01:54.000 Yeah.

00:01:54.000 But is that because that's because of how much you exercise and stuff?

00:01:57.000 It's a that, but it's also I'm a glutton.

00:01:59.000 Yeah.

00:02:00.000 I'm a glutton.

00:02:01.000 But you could do it.

00:02:01.000 Yeah.

00:02:02.000 I can get away with it.

00:02:03.000 But I do eat a lot.

00:02:04.000 Like if I go out to dinner, I will eat a st a large steak.

00:02:08.000 I will have multiple sides of multiple appetizers, and then I look like I'm pregnant when I leave.

00:02:16.000 That's how you eat, yeah.

00:02:17.000 You just I fucking eat I eat a lot of food, man.

00:02:20.000 It's not it's not smart.

00:02:22.000 How do you burn all your calories?

00:02:23.000 Is it all trying like you have like is it all like jujitsu stuff or whatever?

00:02:27.000 I do a lot of working out, but I also do intermittent fasting.

00:02:30.000 I'm just smart about when to be a glutton and then when to back off.

00:02:34.000 Yeah.

00:02:35.000 You know, I just don't keep my foot on the gas, that's all.

00:02:37.000 But like when I go to New York, it's all Italian food.

00:02:40.000 It's Italian food for like three days.

00:02:42.000 You gotta I can eat it every day.

00:02:44.000 I could too.

00:02:45.000 It's a problem.

00:02:46.000 It's a problem.

00:02:47.000 It's all Italian subs and pasta and favorite spots in New York.

00:02:53.000 Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:02:53.000 I got a bunch of spots.

00:02:54.000 I got a bunch of spots.

00:02:56.000 I got a spot in Vegas too.

00:02:57.000 We're just at this uh place, Gaetano's.

00:02:59.000 It's all handmade pasta with imported flour from Italy.

00:03:02.000 We ate there after the fights.

00:03:04.000 Oh my god.

00:03:05.000 I love it.

00:03:06.000 I have to go there.

00:03:07.000 I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm going through Vegas on.

00:03:09.000 I'm still doing touring the tour that I was here with last that started in 24.

00:03:13.000 I'm going through till all the way through 26.

00:03:16.000 Oh nice.

00:03:16.000 Yeah.

00:03:17.000 Damn.

00:03:17.000 Yeah, I took like a three-month well.

00:03:19.000 I took a break when I had my my baby my new baby, and then I took like a little bit of a like a six-month, but now I'm like back at it full.

00:03:26.000 I got a bunch of big shows coming up, so it's like let me get out there and like tell people I'm still alive.

00:03:30.000 Yeah, you got you gotta get out there if you want to do something, because it's like the you know, if you just work in the city, yeah, you can't really put together an hour.

00:03:40.000 No, I mean I pieced it together.

00:03:41.000 I mean, I'm uh I'm constantly on the road.

00:03:43.000 I just I just went down just to have a little bit of a breather because we just finished uh uh rapping season 12 of the show.

00:03:49.000 And so I was touring and doing the show, and I had and I had a kid.

00:03:53.000 So it's like I just couldn't even and then we produced another show and all that shit in between.

00:03:58.000 So it's like I just haven't been I went on hiatus on my podcast and stuff because I had to something had to give.

00:04:05.000 So now it's like let me let me just get back out there and just now I'm not filming, I'm just really focusing on the tour and like a new pod I got coming out.

00:04:12.000 When you do stand up, do you take guys with you that are your friends on the road?

00:04:15.000 Yeah, that's the move.

00:04:16.000 Yeah, all the time.

00:04:17.000 That's the only way to go.

00:04:18.000 It's it makes it it makes it fun.

00:04:21.000 Yeah, fun.

00:04:23.000 Yeah, you're with buddies.

00:04:24.000 It's like a vacation that you get to work at.

00:04:26.000 Yeah, if if I if I didn't, it's it can get it can get depressing fast.

00:04:30.000 Real fast.

00:04:31.000 Yeah.

00:04:31.000 If you're solo, super fast.

00:04:33.000 If you're solo and you're working with local openers, especially if they they they're boring.

00:04:37.000 Yeah.

00:04:38.000 And they're they're not fun to hang out with.

00:04:40.000 Oh yeah, that's in the club in the groom.

00:04:41.000 I'm even talking about in like the hotel and stuff.

00:04:43.000 Oh, that's bad too.

00:04:44.000 Yeah.

00:04:45.000 You just gotta find things to do.

00:04:46.000 For me, it's always I've I work out and I play pool.

00:04:49.000 So those are two things that occupy a lot of my time.

00:04:51.000 Yeah.

00:04:52.000 So that's good.

00:04:53.000 I didn't work out and I didn't play pool.

00:04:56.000 So I'm I'm like, I got I got this guy, right?

00:05:00.000 And I'm like, um, I'm weak.

00:05:03.000 I have no stamina.

00:05:05.000 I'm old.

00:05:06.000 And like I need to reverse all this, you know, like so like you're gonna start with me now and I'm I'm really gonna show you nothing.

00:05:12.000 Like I I Well that's good.

00:05:13.000 Yeah.

00:05:14.000 That means you're gonna be able to see progress where I am.

00:05:16.000 Yeah.

00:05:16.000 But that's good.

00:05:17.000 Yeah.

00:05:18.000 You'll be able to see progress.

00:05:19.000 Yeah.

00:05:19.000 It's all no matter where you're at, if you're thinking about working out, do it.

00:05:23.000 Because it's a good place to start, no matter where you're at.

00:05:26.000 Yeah.

00:05:26.000 If you're really fit, great.

00:05:28.000 Good place to start.

00:05:29.000 Yes.

00:05:29.000 Get even more fit.

00:05:31.000 If you're out of shape, great.

00:05:32.000 Good place to start.

00:05:33.000 Good place to start.

00:05:34.000 Baby steps, don't go too hard, don't get hurt, build up slow.

00:05:38.000 Yeah.

00:05:39.000 I got some blood work back, and I was like, I need to change somebody's numbers.

00:05:43.000 And like also I got like a second in-depth blood work, and like they like they told me all this extra stuff that I couldn't have known.

00:05:50.000 And one of us I'm very susceptible to soft tissue injury.

00:05:54.000 Oh, you're a bitch. 1.00

00:05:56.000 Yeah, I'm a bitch. 0.99

00:05:56.000 That's what I think. 0.99

00:05:57.000 It said bitch. 1.00

00:05:58.000 I was translating it.

00:06:00.000 It said bitch on the paper, and then this is how I make myself feel better about it. 1.00

00:06:04.000 How do they determine whether you're soft tissue?

00:06:07.000 That doesn't even make any sense.

00:06:08.000 I don't know.

00:06:09.000 It just said I'm very susceptible to like like I guess whatever it is, ligament bruising, ligament like that kind of stuff.

00:06:16.000 Well, that's just from years of not lifting weights.

00:06:18.000 That's all that is.

00:06:19.000 You think that's just changed my blood so that that's Yeah?

00:06:22.000 A hundred percent.

00:06:23.000 Well, I told the guy, and he's like, all right, that's good to know.

00:06:25.000 And then like my sixth session, I like like we were doing that thing where like I throw a medicine bowl down really hard and then like catch it and then swing it to him.

00:06:33.000 And like on the swing to him, I was like, ah Yeah, you gotta I would never have you do stuff like that to start out with.

00:06:39.000 Yeah.

00:06:39.000 To start out, you should do body weight stuff and you should do it like moderately.

00:06:45.000 Like when I had a bunch of guys in here, we were doing comedians workouts on on Tuesdays, and one of the things that we always did was you do sometimes do it Tuesdays and Thursdays, but one of the things we always did in if if anybody's just starting out, and I'm like, do not go to failure, do not push yourself.

00:07:00.000 I don't I want you to get out of here and feel fine.

00:07:02.000 Yeah, he did say that for to be fair.

00:07:04.000 He's not like killing me or anything.

00:07:06.000 But we worked up to that, but that that one, and then we just backed off of it.

00:07:09.000 But it's rotational stuff is difficult because you know you're putting all especially if you're not particularly coordinated and you're throwing a lot of torque, you know, one way or the other way when you're throwing a medicine ball, especially.

00:07:20.000 I got tons of torque here.

00:07:21.000 Torque.

00:07:22.000 A lot of I got so much torque, right?

00:07:24.000 Like what I don't understand, like what what would determine whether or not you're more susceptible to soft tissue injury.

00:07:30.000 The only thing that makes sense is that you haven't been working out.

00:07:33.000 Like, unless there's a biomarker.

00:07:35.000 Yeah.

00:07:36.000 Is there?

00:07:36.000 I think so, yeah.

00:07:37.000 Put let's put let's try perplexity out.

00:07:43.000 What is uh a biomarker that would indicate you're more susceptible to soft tissue injury?

00:07:51.000 I have my results in a PDF somewhere.

00:07:53.000 I could go or I can call my doctor.

00:07:55.000 Well, we will find out.

00:07:56.000 We'll find out quick.

00:07:57.000 But it just to me it'll the only thing that would make sense is that you haven't been using that tissue.

00:08:02.000 That's the only thing that would make sense.

00:08:04.000 And there's probably things that they could show in terms of levels of like uh creatinine, I think that's how you say it, and maybe some other stuff that would indicate.

00:08:15.000 Here it goes.

00:08:15.000 What biomark would indicate one's susceptible to soft tissue injuries?

00:08:20.000 Um well supported biomarket that indicates susceptibility to soft tissue injuries, genetic variant.

00:08:25.000 Oh, and the elastin, ELN gene.

00:08:29.000 Interesting.

00:08:30.000 Which has been identified as a marker of ligament weakness and may signal increased risk of injury.

00:08:36.000 Whoa.

00:08:36.000 Yeah, there you go.

00:08:37.000 So that's what you have.

00:08:38.000 I'm a variant.

00:08:39.000 I'm a I'm a uh what do you call this X-Men?

00:08:42.000 I'm a mutant.

00:08:43.000 So this is the word I was looking for.

00:08:44.000 Classic serum protein markers like creatine kinase, uh lactate what's that word?

00:08:51.000 Diodragenase and myoglobin reflect muscle tissue breakdown and can indicate tissue vulnerability or prior damage, but they're used in predicting susceptibility as opposed to reaching in as opposed to recent injury is less robust.

00:09:08.000 Recent research has also shown that profiling early healing stages through mass spectrometically spectr Jesus Christ.

00:09:15.000 Spectrometry can in identify multiple proteins whose baseline alterations may point to greater risk for delayed or poor recovery.

00:09:26.000 Hmm.

00:09:26.000 So what is this guy got you doing?

00:09:28.000 Like what is like a typical workout for you?

00:09:31.000 He switches it up every single every single time.

00:09:33.000 I mean I've been doing I've been seeing him about four weeks, three times a week.

00:09:37.000 How'd you find him?

00:09:38.000 He actually lived in the building next to me.

00:09:40.000 Oh.

00:09:41.000 And I ran into him.

00:09:42.000 This is weird stuff has been happening like this lately.

00:09:44.000 Like I'm like, I really gotta get a trainer.

00:09:45.000 And I was like walking in between the we had a little thing, like thing in the between the buildings, and he w like he just was there talking to someone and I he mentioned because I'm a physical trainer, I'm like, I need someone.

00:09:54.000 He's like I'll walk over, we'll do it.

00:09:56.000 So I do it like six thirty in the morning.

00:09:57.000 That's the thing that's a little harder too.

00:09:59.000 It's like I the only time I could do it is six thirty in the morning because I have like a you know, that's good though.

00:10:04.000 No, I know I started the right way.

00:10:05.000 No, you gotta win.

00:10:06.000 It is good, and I it's been crazy like how much I feel like I've done now by like two two o'clock in the afternoon.

00:10:11.000 Yeah.

00:10:11.000 But when that alarm goes off at like six, and I know he's waiting downstairs, and you know, but I'm just like now it's cause now it's winter, like back home.

00:10:18.000 I don't know about here, but like it's still completely pitch black outside, you know.

00:10:22.000 Like so just getting up in that darkness and being like my my wife's sleep and I'm putting on a fucking headband. 0.87

00:10:30.000 I sweat.

00:10:31.000 Like a tennis.

00:10:32.000 I wore a hat at first, but I was like, I need to get no, I bought like I got like fancy with I bought like a Lululemon headband.

00:10:37.000 Oh nice.

00:10:38.000 It's not it's like it I don't know.

00:10:40.000 Yeah.

00:10:40.000 I I look I look the part.

00:10:42.000 Okay.

00:10:43.000 I look stretched down out.

00:10:46.000 Listen, that's it's all the th looking the parts fun.

00:10:48.000 No, no.

00:10:49.000 It's all part of just fucking doing it.

00:10:51.000 It's been good.

00:10:52.000 It's I felt immediate it's immediately it changes my there's just that release.

00:10:57.000 It just feels great.

00:10:58.000 The first workout I felt like right afterwards.

00:10:59.000 I was like, this is amazing.

00:11:02.000 That's great.

00:11:02.000 Yeah.

00:11:03.000 As long as you don't go too hard.

00:11:05.000 That's what I always tell everybody.

00:11:06.000 You can't you're not gonna be able to keep up.

00:11:08.000 If you you try a crazy pace right off the bat, you're not gonna be able to keep up with it, and you're gonna you're not gonna be able to recover, you're gonna get broken down, you gotta build it slow.

00:11:17.000 I it used to take care of itself with like just sports and stuff.

00:11:20.000 Like, but I don't I don't do that anymore, you know.

00:11:22.000 Like I haven't done that in forever.

00:11:23.000 Are you a good athlete outside of like whatever training you do?

00:11:26.000 Like are you a s at sports?

00:11:28.000 Like, do you play any sports?

00:11:29.000 I own the only sport I played, I played baseball when I was a kid, and then once I started doing martial arts when I was in my early teens, I quit everything.

00:11:38.000 Wow.

00:11:38.000 Yeah.

00:11:38.000 And just focused on that.

00:11:40.000 Yeah.

00:11:40.000 Oh shit.

00:11:42.000 Well, you for me, it's like I hated team sports because I'm kind of, you know, stubborn.

00:11:48.000 And like I either struck out or hit a home run, no matter what happened.

00:11:52.000 They're always like, they were always like, get on base, I'd be like, right.

00:11:55.000 Like fucking, I'm going for the bleach, bitch. 1.00

00:11:59.000 And either I was a hero or everybody was mad at me.

00:12:01.000 And that's how I always played.

00:12:03.000 I didn't care.

00:12:03.000 Like I've I'm not gonna be a loser because Billy drops the ball in the in fucking left field.

00:12:08.000 Right.

00:12:08.000 I don't care.

00:12:09.000 Yeah.

00:12:09.000 Like, and so then when I found wrestling, I was like, okay, this is better.

00:12:12.000 This is just me.

00:12:14.000 And then I got into martial arts and I was like, okay, this I like.

00:12:17.000 This is just like I can I either put in the work and get better, or I don't.

00:12:23.000 I either win or I lose.

00:12:24.000 There's no weird gray area.

00:12:28.000 The only gray area is decisions.

00:12:30.000 Decisions sucked.

00:12:32.000 Because there's a lot of bias judges, and you know, if you're in like someone's hometown and you've got to their ass.

00:12:38.000 Really?

00:12:38.000 Terrible.

00:12:39.000 That blatant?

00:12:39.000 Oh, yeah.

00:12:40.000 Don't you remember Roy Jones Jr. in the Olympics?

00:12:43.000 I don't know.

00:12:44.000 Roy Jones Jr. in the it was actually a beautiful moment that because Roy Jones Jr. in the Olympics, he boxed beautifully.

00:12:52.000 It was a perfect performance in the finals, and he lost.

00:12:56.000 There's no way he lost.

00:12:57.000 But it was in Korea and it was against the Korean national champion.

00:13:01.000 Okay.

00:13:01.000 And so the Korean national champion, he won the gold medal, and then came to visit Roy Jones recently and gave him the gold medal and said, You should have won that fight.

00:13:12.000 Like recently recently?

00:13:13.000 Yeah, recently recently.

00:13:14.000 Yeah.

00:13:14.000 Wow.

00:13:16.000 But never?

00:13:16.000 Yeah.

00:13:17.000 Wow.

00:13:18.000 But when I was a kid and I watched that, I was so disheartened.

00:13:23.000 Because I'd seen that in Taekwondo a lot.

00:13:25.000 Yeah.

00:13:25.000 I I'd seen that in kickboxing a lot.

00:13:27.000 And it's just it's embarrassing.

00:13:30.000 It's just when you see like blatant, obvious corruption, and that to me that decision is one of the worst examples of blatant corruption because Roy Jones just ran away with that fight.

00:13:44.000 The only thing you didn't do is knock that guy out, but he beat his ass.

00:13:47.000 They don't feel repercussions when it's that obvious.

00:13:52.000 It happens in the UFC.

00:13:54.000 Yes, it happens in the UFC all the time.

00:13:56.000 There's bad decisions, and and you know, and it's it's infuriating.

00:14:00.000 It's infuriating to the athlete too, because particularly in the UFC, there's a win bonus.

00:14:05.000 So imagine if you beat a guy, like you really hit the gas in the second and third round, you fucking burn yourself out, you get the decision, you're like, I fucking did it, I did it.

00:14:13.000 You're your corner celebrating, we got it.

00:14:15.000 We got the last two rounds, all you, all you and then you hear the judges, and you're like, no fucking way.

00:14:21.000 They robbed me.

00:14:22.000 Wow.

00:14:22.000 And it happens, it happens all the time.

00:14:24.000 So say if you're a young guy and you're starting out in the UFC and you have a contract, maybe it's like 15 and 15.

00:14:30.000 What that means is you get 15,000 to show and then 15,000 to win.

00:14:35.000 So if you lose, you only get that 15,000.

00:14:37.000 So those judges just stole $15,000 from you when you're struggling just to feed yourself, right?

00:14:44.000 And if you're getting $15,000 to fight, you have to pay for managers, you have to pay for your gym fees, you have to pay for nutrition, you have to pay for supplements, you know.

00:14:55.000 You have to maybe you're getting a massage once a week, you gotta pay for that.

00:14:59.000 It's like you don't have any money.

00:15:01.000 Zero money.

00:15:01.000 Yeah, you have to work a job.

00:15:02.000 There's no way you're doing that without a job.

00:15:04.000 Right.

00:15:04.000 If you're lucky, you could teach.

00:15:06.000 You know, if you're lucky, you can maybe teach private like if you're jujitsu guy or a kickboxer, you could teach people during the day.

00:15:12.000 Yeah.

00:15:13.000 But other than that, man, you fucking you're barely getting by, and they just stole 15 grand from you.

00:15:18.000 Wow.

00:15:18.000 And happens all the time.

00:15:20.000 And nothing comes with it, right?

00:15:21.000 There's appeals, appeals of bullshit.

00:15:23.000 We we get mad, you know, we talk about it in the commentary, and we you know, Daniel particularly gets upset because he was a professional fighter and he's seen it.

00:15:31.000 Yeah.

00:15:32.000 You know, but it's like they always say don't leave it in the judge's hands.

00:15:36.000 But that's nonsense because you these guys, you're not good enough to knock them out.

00:15:40.000 And if you try to knock them out, you're gonna get knocked out.

00:15:42.000 Right.

00:15:43.000 It's like you have to fight smart.

00:15:44.000 Right.

00:15:45.000 So like you always should fight the the best you can, but smart.

00:15:49.000 Yeah.

00:15:50.000 And if you don't do that, you you're not you shouldn't be a professional fighter.

00:15:53.000 It's because you're gonna get beat up when you shouldn't get beat up.

00:15:56.000 You're gonna get hurt when you shouldn't get hurt, you know.

00:15:58.000 Yeah.

00:15:59.000 I didn't I never did anything.

00:16:00.000 I took karate for like six months.

00:16:02.000 I never did.

00:16:03.000 It was team sports for me, but it was um I wasn't particularly at the I I actually when uh the first year our uh grammar school got a basketball team.

00:16:15.000 I was in uh seventh grade, and so uh if you were in eighth grade, you automatically made varsity, and then whatever remaining spots you have to try out.

00:16:25.000 I wasn't really good, right?

00:16:26.000 But I tried out and I was the last one cut.

00:16:29.000 So I was the very first person to be placed on the JV team.

00:16:33.000 Oh no.

00:16:33.000 So the best of the JV, right?

00:16:37.000 I we we didn't have a coach.

00:16:41.000 School did not have a basketball program.

00:16:42.000 So my friend my friend's mom, who prior to this just owned a bakery. 0.94

00:16:50.000 She was like, I'll go.

00:16:53.000 I mean, she had no she had no experience outside of pastries.

00:16:58.000 And she got like a clipboard, like a whiteboard clipboard, and we met at the school gym and she started running drills with us.

00:17:05.000 And it was like whoever else wanted to be play can play.

00:17:08.000 So I yes, I got cut last, so I was the you know.

00:17:11.000 How'd you do?

00:17:13.000 I want I was the MV.

00:17:14.000 So I I was MVP of the team for the season.

00:17:18.000 Nice.

00:17:18.000 Went to the award ceremony.

00:17:20.000 No, let me finish talking.

00:17:21.000 Oh, sorry.

00:17:21.000 Yeah, yeah, no.

00:17:22.000 You'll see.

00:17:23.000 The team, first of all, so we weren't good, we knew we weren't good, and we were like, okay, watch this first team we're gonna play is gonna be like amazing.

00:17:32.000 So we show up for this first game, okay.

00:17:34.000 We get to the Catholic CYO center, it's like the Catholic youth organization gym.

00:17:39.000 We get there, every single kid on that team is just like Dominican or like the like we were all like scorny little white kids. 1.00

00:17:48.000 These kids were like six feet tall already.

00:17:51.000 I I'll never forget it.

00:17:52.000 I walked in and what the you do drills in the beginning before you start the game, you all take like going to line and take layups on your side, they're taking layups on their side.

00:18:00.000 And I remember I I locked eyes with some kid and he looked at me and he was dribbling the ball backwards through his legs as he walked backwards.

00:18:07.000 And he didn't break eye contact with me.

00:18:09.000 And then he like ran up and like he did a layup and like tapped the backboard or whatever.

00:18:14.000 We lost 44 nothing.

00:18:18.000 Okay.

00:18:19.000 44 nothing.

00:18:21.000 Okay.

00:18:21.000 So at the end of the game, you're supposed to like line up and you all like you know, touch hands or whatever.

00:18:27.000 And you go upstairs in this little rec room, and you get like some Fritos and a juice box or whatever, right?

00:18:33.000 So this the parents were there, and the parents of this team were engaged.

00:18:37.000 I mean, they they were I'm a shutout in basketball is pretty tough.

00:18:40.000 And the parents were going nuts.

00:18:42.000 And so at the end, when the buzzer sounded, like the parents were chanting 44 zip zip, 44 zip, and they were chanting it like loud, right?

00:18:51.000 And then when we got online, the kids started chanting, the parents started chanting.

00:18:55.000 The parents ran onto the court, and I just literally like, and we're shaking hands, they're all chanting 44 zip.

00:19:01.000 We go all together up the stairs to get the juice box on.

00:19:04.000 The parents are screaming it up the hallway, 44, right in our face, like 44 zip zip.

00:19:09.000 I mean, literally, it was like the most humiliating experience.

00:19:14.000 Next game, uh, we played Blessed Sacrament.

00:19:17.000 We lost 56-3.

00:19:19.000 I had the three points.

00:19:20.000 Congratulations.

00:19:21.000 Two points and a foul.

00:19:22.000 Uh a bucket and a foul, right?

00:19:24.000 And then we proceeded to go 0-14 on the year.

00:19:28.000 The last the last game of the season at halftime.

00:19:31.000 I don't know what happened.

00:19:32.000 We looked up and we were winning.

00:19:34.000 It was the first time we ever had a lead.

00:19:35.000 It was the last game of the year as halftime.

00:19:37.000 And someone was like, holy shit, we're fucking winning.

00:19:39.000 And we looked up and it was like 1816 or something, and we lost.

00:19:43.000 So they proceed to have the awards dinner.

00:19:47.000 Well, you know, everyone like it was all the teams.

00:19:49.000 It's like it's a sports dinner.

00:19:50.000 So like they're doing all the awards for varsity JV across all the platforms, and they insisted on doing it.

00:19:58.000 So I was the MV.

00:20:00.000 I was the MVP of the team.

00:20:02.000 Because you scored the only three points.

00:20:03.000 I had 16 points on the season.

00:20:06.000 14 games, 16 points.

00:20:08.000 I had to get up in front of everyone at the buffet and ho and take the trophy that said Salvo Cano MVP JV, you know, 1990, whatever it was.

00:20:16.000 And I would just was like, Thank you.

00:20:18.000 You know, like we were owing four.

00:20:19.000 I had 16 fucking points.

00:20:20.000 I have that, I have that trophy right now in my den on my mantle.

00:20:25.000 That's hilarious.

00:20:26.000 Yeah, that's hilarious.

00:20:27.000 16 points on the season.

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00:21:38.000 Boy, that'll teach you a sense of humor.

00:21:40.000 Yeah.

00:21:40.000 I mean, right away I would just say 44 zip zip in your face by grown-ups.

00:21:44.000 Yeah.

00:21:44.000 Zip.

00:21:45.000 Jesus.

00:21:46.000 I mean, like, going like that.

00:21:47.000 What kind of sportsmanship is that?

00:21:49.000 There was none there that day.

00:21:50.000 There was none there that day.

00:21:52.000 There's something to be said for that.

00:21:53.000 There's something to be said for that.

00:21:54.000 We had no business being out of that.

00:21:56.000 I can only imagine what it looked like.

00:21:57.000 Like if they if they want their kids to be pros, you know.

00:22:00.000 Yeah.

00:22:00.000 If they want a the kids to really dominate, you gotta really encourage the shit out of them.

00:22:05.000 Yeah.

00:22:05.000 You know.

00:22:06.000 And for a lot of people.

00:22:07.000 Look, if you've got a kid that's six feet tall already, and you know, he's fucking 14 and he's really good already at basketball, you're like, we might get rich.

00:22:16.000 Yeah.

00:22:16.000 You know, this is like a shot.

00:22:17.000 Yeah, it's true.

00:22:18.000 Fuck yeah, it's a giant shot.

00:22:21.000 I mean, if a kid can make it, yeah.

00:22:23.000 In professional sports.

00:22:25.000 Oh my god.

00:22:25.000 You know, it's your kid, and it made me if you're a lower income people, and you know you have a kid and you your family's really into sports.

00:22:32.000 I hope it's a way out.

00:22:32.000 Oh, yeah, man.

00:22:33.000 I mean, it's like one of the rare things.

00:22:36.000 It's a lot of pressure on those kids.

00:22:38.000 Oh my god, I could imagine.

00:22:39.000 We didn't have uniforms, our team.

00:22:41.000 Every other uniforms, no, we wore a gym uniform, so that's hilarious.

00:22:46.000 Which was like, you know, like the short shorts and like just the t-shirt and stuff.

00:22:50.000 That's hilarious.

00:22:50.000 And me, I was like such a I I tucked mine in, my socks are up to my knees, that kind of thing.

00:22:55.000 Yeah.

00:22:56.000 I have to pitch it.

00:22:58.000 It's a my little giants or whatever.

00:23:00.000 There's no win at the end, though.

00:23:02.000 It doesn't have to be failed miserably.

00:23:04.000 You don't have to win.

00:23:05.000 Now how hard it was to accept that trophy.

00:23:08.000 It's odd.

00:23:09.000 Yeah.

00:23:10.000 But now it's like great.

00:23:11.000 It's like I have the trophy and I like I should I I I never did it on stage.

00:23:15.000 I should maybe work that in the city.

00:23:17.000 It's a good setup for being a comedian.

00:23:19.000 Yeah.

00:23:19.000 You know, that kind of like humility.

00:23:22.000 It's like it humbles you.

00:23:24.000 Yeah.

00:23:24.000 It's a good setup.

00:23:25.000 Like you gotta realize.

00:23:26.000 Yeah.

00:23:26.000 We're not all created equal.

00:23:29.000 Yeah.

00:23:30.000 That's a crock of shit.

00:23:31.000 I'm funnier than any one of those kids, I'll tell you that one.

00:23:33.000 There you go.

00:23:36.000 But like the idea that everyone's created equal physically is that's a hilarious idea.

00:23:41.000 You haven't met any extreme athletes.

00:23:44.000 There's people out there that are just they're different than all of us.

00:23:47.000 Just it's not fair.

00:23:50.000 That's just how the universe works.

00:23:52.000 Some people's great grandparents were fucking Vikings.

00:23:55.000 Like for real Vikings.

00:23:58.000 I've been I've been trying to like figure out what else to do.

00:24:00.000 Like I just I need some type of outlet because it's like I I haven't been doing it.

00:24:04.000 Why don't you take up a sport?

00:24:05.000 Well, so I have so another thing that happened to me, this was the weirdest thing ever.

00:24:08.000 I was like, just popped into my head.

00:24:11.000 I don't know why.

00:24:11.000 I was like, I think I want to learn how to sail.

00:24:14.000 What I think I might have meant pro maybe is like I want to learn how to drive a boat.

00:24:17.000 But like I was like, I think I want to learn how to sail.

00:24:19.000 And so I was telling this to my wife, and then like just same thing as the trainer, like uh like a few days later, it was like four days later.

00:24:27.000 I was at music class with my daughter, and one of the dads was there with his daughter, and I was inviting him to go somewhere, like a group activity, and he was like, I'd love to, but I can't.

00:24:36.000 I teach sailing that day.

00:24:38.000 Whoa.

00:24:38.000 And I was like, Are you serious?

00:24:40.000 And you were already thinking about it.

00:24:41.000 Four days ago I said to my wife, I want to learn how to sail.

00:24:43.000 He goes, Let's go.

00:24:43.000 Do you think that you have the ability to manifest things like that in your life?

00:24:47.000 Do you ever wonder?

00:24:48.000 I don't think.

00:24:49.000 I don't I don't think.

00:24:50.000 There are people that believe that.

00:24:51.000 There are people that believe that the way your consciousness interacts with the universe is what makes things happen.

00:24:58.000 Fucking people don't happen exactly as randomly as we want to believe that they do.

00:25:05.000 But there are things that you do where you put energy out there.

00:25:08.000 I'd like to put it in and you make there's a lot of examples of it.

00:25:11.000 It's a weird one to believe in.

00:25:13.000 Because I feel like it's an element to life.

00:25:17.000 And the problem is people are always looking for it to be the element, like the thing.

00:25:21.000 Like, do you remember that movie The Secret?

00:25:23.000 Yeah.

00:25:23.000 So during that time, a lot of people unfortunately got convinced that they could wish their life into existence.

00:25:29.000 Yeah, they get like a board and a vision board and all that stuff.

00:25:33.000 I think that is a part of things.

00:25:37.000 That that putting something into your head is a part of things.

00:25:40.000 But I don't I don't think it's the whole thing.

00:25:42.000 Yeah.

00:25:42.000 And I think if you think of it as the primary thing instead of thinking of it as the whole like the whole thing is all these different pieces.

00:25:50.000 Like if you want to get healthy, you have to eat well, you have to take vitamins, you have to exercise, you have to sleep, you have to drink plenty of water, you have to cut out all the bad stuff, like alcohol and that.

00:26:00.000 So there's a lot of elements.

00:26:02.000 It's not just work out.

00:26:03.000 Yeah.

00:26:03.000 Right.

00:26:04.000 There's a lot of elements.

00:26:05.000 And I think that's the thing with like manifesting stuff.

00:26:08.000 I don't think it's entirely bullshit.

00:26:11.000 I think there's something to it.

00:26:13.000 I mean, look, you you start, you know, you start lining all your ducks in a row, eventually, you know, something's gonna be cohesive.

00:26:19.000 But but the thing of like me running into a guy.

00:26:22.000 That's what I'm saying.

00:26:23.000 Yeah, that that's like what's that?

00:26:25.000 That's what I'm saying.

00:26:26.000 The sailing and the fitness training.

00:26:28.000 Yeah.

00:26:28.000 Like right when you're putting it out there, I there's a lot of people that believe this, and that believe that what we think of as physical reality, just being static and locked down.

00:26:40.000 It's not really the case.

00:26:42.000 And that there's a strange dance between consciousness and physical reality that we're not totally aware of.

00:26:48.000 Yeah.

00:26:49.000 And that we don't really have the senses to like be able to measure it, to to to somehow or another quantify it and put it on a scale.

00:26:57.000 Like what percentage of how your life Goes depends on how you what kind of energy you put out there.

00:27:03.000 Energy's big energy's big.

00:27:05.000 That's why I'm always very particular about who I hang out with.

00:27:08.000 Because people think it's no big deal to hang out with idiots.

00:27:11.000 But the problem is you're absorbing their energy.

00:27:14.000 And instead of hanging out with really cool people and you absorb their energy, and everybody like gets out of there feeling fucking great.

00:27:20.000 Yeah.

00:27:21.000 What a good time.

00:27:22.000 They just suck the energy.

00:27:23.000 They suck it and they make it about them and they get negative and they're fucking passive aggressive and weird or whatever it is.

00:27:30.000 It's like I don't want to deal with them anymore, man.

00:27:32.000 Yeah.

00:27:32.000 You eventually shed those people home.

00:27:35.000 You should because they are energy.

00:27:37.000 It's like you you can I and I think how you feel personally, like how your life is going has a giant effect on how your life can go because you're thinking in a positive way.

00:27:49.000 You know, like you're you're you're in the right groove, you're in the right vibration.

00:27:54.000 Yeah.

00:27:54.000 If you want to get real hippie, you want to get all crystally.

00:27:57.000 But there's something to it.

00:27:58.000 It's not everything.

00:28:00.000 It's not the whole thing.

00:28:01.000 I don't think it should be dismissed.

00:28:03.000 Because I think there's a reality to it.

00:28:05.000 Because I just there's too many times.

00:28:07.000 Too many times.

00:28:08.000 Like, how many times have you ever run into a fucking trainer?

00:28:11.000 And the guy's telling you a train.

00:28:13.000 Fucking never, right?

00:28:14.000 Someone blew me away.

00:28:15.000 How many times do you ever run into someone who teaches it?

00:28:17.000 And I took it.

00:28:17.000 I went sailing the other day.

00:28:19.000 Took my first one in New York Harbor, man.

00:28:20.000 Wow.

00:28:21.000 It was crazy.

00:28:22.000 My parents lived on a sailboat for like two years.

00:28:25.000 Might have been more.

00:28:26.000 Might have been a little more.

00:28:27.000 Yeah.

00:28:28.000 Yeah.

00:28:28.000 They just started they before you were born?

00:28:31.000 No, no, no.

00:28:31.000 No.

00:28:32.000 When I was already a grown man.

00:28:33.000 Oh.

00:28:34.000 Like right when I started getting on TV and I started making some loot.

00:28:37.000 Um, I helped them get this sailboat, and they got a sailboat, and they just live.

00:28:42.000 They already sailed.

00:28:43.000 No, no, they learned how to sail and did it.

00:28:46.000 Whoa, because it's not easy, by the way.

00:28:48.000 Gangster move.

00:28:49.000 Yeah, and they were like living down like in the Bahamas and shit.

00:28:52.000 That's living off of a sailboat for a few years.

00:28:55.000 What kind of parents you got?

00:28:55.000 Uh my parents, this is a foreign idea to me.

00:28:59.000 Yeah, they just took they took this chance.

00:29:01.000 They just decided like to let's see.

00:29:02.000 But they they lived on it.

00:29:04.000 Oh, yeah, with a cat too, with our cat that we had when we were kids.

00:29:08.000 The cat was on the boat with them.

00:29:10.000 This is fascinating.

00:29:11.000 Yeah, they were uh they took well, they're still alive.

00:29:13.000 I shouldn't say they were, they are.

00:29:14.000 They they you know, they they like to live life.

00:29:17.000 And so they went to the body.

00:29:19.000 I did, yeah.

00:29:20.000 Yeah, I visited them on the boat.

00:29:21.000 Yeah, it was fun.

00:29:23.000 Uh I didn't visit them in the Bahamas.

00:29:24.000 I visited them when they had it out here.

00:29:26.000 Oh, they had it in America.

00:29:27.000 But uh it was uh interesting because like to be able to do that, that's a crazy scan.

00:29:32.000 And they had to weather some storms.

00:29:34.000 Like they had to get docked up during a storm.

00:29:36.000 My stepdad had to go out to someone else's boat because it wasn't tied down, and he had to tie this dude's boat down in the middle of a fucking storm.

00:29:44.000 Yeah, that's like life.

00:29:46.000 Life risking shit.

00:29:48.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:29:48.000 They did it for a couple years.

00:29:50.000 My mom was like, What was the life before that?

00:29:53.000 Like, was there just a standard?

00:29:55.000 No, yeah, he's an architect, and uh, you know.

00:29:58.000 Because that is a bold choice.

00:30:00.000 Yeah, it was a crazy choice.

00:30:01.000 Not even to just learn because it's like I'm gonna live on this sailboat, I'm gonna go live in a tropical environment, I'm gonna live, I'm gonna learn how to sail.

00:30:07.000 I think they just you know, people don't like work, man.

00:30:11.000 Like a regular job, like work sucks.

00:30:15.000 And if you and you get to a certain point in your life when your kids have left the house and you're like, this is life.

00:30:20.000 This isn't like preparing for something.

00:30:22.000 Yeah, this is life.

00:30:23.000 Right.

00:30:24.000 I'm not preparing for life right now, so I don't want to do this.

00:30:26.000 Right.

00:30:27.000 I don't like doing this.

00:30:28.000 Let's just do something else while we can.

00:30:30.000 Yeah, because it was it and like when you're out on a boat, it's that's what it is.

00:30:34.000 Yeah, that's what it is.

00:30:38.000 It's like being in the mountains, like or you know, being in nature.

00:30:40.000 When you're in nature, you go to the woods, like, okay, this is just this is the only thing that matters.

00:30:44.000 Like this existence.

00:30:46.000 I like that because I I didn't grow up with that, and that's not common for me, and it's like the one thing that really resonates with me as far as like shutting my brain off and things like that.

00:30:54.000 Oh, yeah, the oceans.

00:30:56.000 There's a reason why all those rich folks live like right on the ocean.

00:30:58.000 They're not stupid.

00:31:00.000 Yeah.

00:31:02.000 I rented a house once in in Malibu.

00:31:04.000 We were getting our kitchen redone in California, and uh we we couldn't stay in the house, and so um for like four months we rented a house and we rented this house like on the water, and uh you wake up and you sit in the patio and it's these sliding glass doors, and you're literally above right above the ocean.

00:31:24.000 So you see nothing but this little little balcony and then water, and you're like, oh I get it.

00:31:31.000 Yeah, I wonder why these people live right next to each other in a 20 million dollar house.

00:31:35.000 Like I was like, who the fuck wants to buy a house with no yard?

00:31:39.000 You're jammed up next to your neighbors.

00:31:41.000 That's stupid.

00:31:42.000 And then I got there one morning drinking coffee, sitting there by myself, smoking a joint.

00:31:46.000 I'm like, okay.

00:31:46.000 Yeah, it's like biological.

00:31:48.000 It's like you can't get it.

00:31:49.000 Yeah.

00:31:49.000 I go, oh yeah, I get it.

00:31:50.000 I see what you guys are doing.

00:31:51.000 Yeah.

00:31:52.000 Oh, yeah, this is better.

00:31:53.000 This is like you're watching a show and a work of art at the same time while you're you're taking in sunshine and fresh clean air from the ocean.

00:32:02.000 Yeah.

00:32:03.000 But here's here's the fucker.

00:32:06.000 The difference between the water in the day and the water in the night is huge.

00:32:12.000 The water in the day is beautiful.

00:32:15.000 It's blue, and you see dolphins and you see seagulls everywhere.

00:32:20.000 It's incredible.

00:32:22.000 It's it's food for the soul.

00:32:25.000 At night, it's a black monster.

00:32:28.000 Yeah, man.

00:32:28.000 At night, when you realize, especially me, because you know, I'm probably a little high at the time.

00:32:33.000 Yeah.

00:32:33.000 And I'm looking out at that water.

00:32:35.000 Abyss.

00:32:36.000 And I'm like, there is billions and trillions of gallons of water out there, and no one can control it.

00:32:43.000 And all it takes is the earth just having this one little one little shift of the tectonic plates.

00:32:49.000 And oh fucking wave is coming.

00:32:52.000 And you're right on the edge.

00:32:54.000 How and I sleep like a log.

00:32:57.000 Yeah.

00:32:57.000 You know, like it's Yeah, if a tsunami's coming, you're done.

00:33:01.000 Yeah, look at this one swept away.

00:33:03.000 I this is the outer banks.

00:33:05.000 Yeah.

00:33:05.000 Yeah, and this ain't even a tsunami.

00:33:07.000 This is just a house game.

00:33:08.000 Yeah, that's that's tough, man.

00:33:09.000 That's there's a video of this guy walking his dog in Russia.

00:33:13.000 And it's real recent.

00:33:15.000 And there was uh a tsunami that there was a giant warning.

00:33:18.000 They knew it was gonna happen because there was a huge earthquake off the coast.

00:33:21.000 Yeah.

00:33:21.000 And so they knew it was coming.

00:33:22.000 So this guy is way up on this cliff side.

00:33:26.000 Watch this.

00:33:26.000 Look how high he is.

00:33:27.000 See how high he is?

00:33:28.000 Yeah.

00:33:29.000 That water is he?

00:33:30.000 Oh, he's in Russia.

00:33:31.000 He's say he that's him and taking the video.

00:33:32.000 Yeah, so he's he's taking his video and he's with his dog.

00:33:36.000 It's kind of cool when you hear his voice too.

00:33:37.000 It's like, Well, so look, look how high he was, right?

00:33:43.000 And look at this water coming in.

00:33:47.000 Oh, dude, it gets all the way over the top.

00:33:50.000 No.

00:33:50.000 Oh, yeah.

00:33:50.000 Look at the dog.

00:33:51.000 The dog's almost died.

00:33:53.000 Dog doesn't know it almost died.

00:33:55.000 This silly dog is just sitting there.

00:33:57.000 It keeps going.

00:33:59.000 Bro, this is banana.

00:34:01.000 That's that's horrifying.

00:34:02.000 Look how high it gets.

00:34:03.000 Yeah.

00:34:04.000 And he's now at this point in time, he's realizing like, oh shit, look, it gets over the top.

00:34:09.000 It crests over the top of the fucking hill.

00:34:11.000 Yeah.

00:34:12.000 I mean, that's like a hundred feet.

00:34:14.000 Yeah.

00:34:15.000 I it's that's insane.

00:34:17.000 Yeah, you've seen the perfect sword.

00:34:19.000 But that's what happens at night.

00:34:20.000 Yeah.

00:34:20.000 When you're sitting there at night, you can't sleep.

00:34:22.000 Because you're like, what am I doing?

00:34:23.000 Why would I sleep here?

00:34:25.000 This is so stupid.

00:34:26.000 It's it's weird how it flips like that.

00:34:28.000 Just all you have to do is just be real.

00:34:30.000 Like in the day, you're not real.

00:34:32.000 It's say it's like, oh, the sun has given me vitamin D. It's like at night, it's like, no, no, no, no, no.

00:34:37.000 This is just water.

00:34:39.000 An immense amount of water that no one is in control of.

00:34:42.000 Yeah.

00:34:43.000 Get out of here.

00:34:44.000 I was like, scuba.

00:34:46.000 No.

00:34:47.000 No?

00:34:47.000 No, no, no.

00:34:49.000 No, no.

00:34:50.000 That's their world.

00:34:51.000 That's their world, dude.

00:34:53.000 This is an ad by BetterHelp.

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00:36:17.000 I I I did it on a on a on a trip in uh the Cayman Islands.

00:36:20.000 And uh I always wanted to do it, so I was psyched to do it.

00:36:24.000 And I did one time prior to that in a pool, so I was like, all right, I kind of gonna whatever.

00:36:28.000 And I almost couldn't go through with it because like the the um the initial descent, they have to put weights on you.

00:36:35.000 Oh boy.

00:36:36.000 And it just goes against everything your body feels your body's like no no no no no and they say like you know, try to breathe measured.

00:36:44.000 If you breathe a lot, you run out of air faster.

00:36:47.000 Oh fun.

00:36:48.000 Right?

00:36:48.000 So it's like yeah, just just hearing the fact, oh, you run out of air.

00:36:51.000 Is the tank the the meter based on how much air is in or how much time or like how much you've been breathing?

00:36:57.000 Like could you fuck up and and breathe too much?

00:36:59.000 Yes.

00:37:00.000 And it wouldn't say E yet.

00:37:01.000 No, no, no.

00:37:02.000 I mean I had the little dial so it'll show you.

00:37:05.000 Yeah, and I was with someone.

00:37:06.000 I was like, you know, but still, by the way, it doesn't matter, by the way.

00:37:09.000 So it's like I couldn't get down.

00:37:10.000 I'm claustrophobic, and so I think that played into it, but like you have to start it just you have to overcome the sensation that you're maybe drowning or being suffocated.

00:37:23.000 Like, you know, you like you go down and the weights start to pull you down and you adjust to breathing through here, but then that's it.

00:37:30.000 Like, and if you want to like talk, or it's like you don't you don't feel comfortable and you just want out, this you know, you can't just get out.

00:37:38.000 And once you go down 30 feet or so, you have to like you know, you can't just f shoot up either.

00:37:43.000 You have to go up like slowly, obviously.

00:37:44.000 Right.

00:37:45.000 I mean, it's not 30 feet as the bends, but like you know, that whole thing.

00:37:48.000 And so I think it's a lot of people.

00:37:51.000 No, I I only went 30 feet.

00:37:52.000 I think that's like very simple stuff.

00:37:54.000 But I still don't think you need real shoot up.

00:37:56.000 Right.

00:37:56.000 It's yeah, it's deeper than a little bit.

00:37:58.000 Yeah.

00:37:59.000 But um but Which is crazy.

00:38:00.000 You get too much nitrogen in your blood and you're fucked.

00:38:03.000 It's fucked up, right?

00:38:04.000 That's crazy.

00:38:05.000 And I got it.

00:38:06.000 That's their world, bro.

00:38:07.000 That's not your world.

00:38:08.000 That's their world.

00:38:09.000 Well, it was 30 feet down, it was still kind of my world.

00:38:11.000 That's far.

00:38:12.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:38:12.000 That's far.

00:38:13.000 Yeah, but I could have breath.

00:38:14.000 I can still see our world, you know what I mean?

00:38:16.000 But if you're out of breath and you gotta get to that 30 feet and you're you're exhausted and out of breath, that's fucking terrifying.

00:38:22.000 Yeah.

00:38:22.000 Well, it was me and my friend, and that was it.

00:38:24.000 It was an instructor.

00:38:25.000 No one else can show up.

00:38:26.000 It was his birthday, I was taking them for his birthday, right?

00:38:28.000 So they like tell you some things of like, all right, I'm gonna go down there with you and like telling you signals and stuff.

00:38:33.000 You know, like if I do this or if I do, you know, whatever the signals were.

00:38:36.000 And I'm like, all right, I'm trying to like remember these goddamn signals, especially like if I need to communicate something.

00:38:41.000 Yeah, there should be a test.

00:38:42.000 Yeah, there wasn't.

00:38:43.000 So we go down, I finally overcome it, and I get down there.

00:38:47.000 And like once I got down there and calmed down, I had moments where I pa was a little panicky again, but like in the moments where I was calm, I was like, all right, I'm going slow, I'm breathing slow, this is cool.

00:38:58.000 And you just kind of like start exploring, and there were these big, like, I guess Oscar, big these big fish, like the size like literally the size of almost my body, like five or six of them together just there.

00:39:08.000 But they weren't like, you know, they couldn't harm you, but like just the sheer size of them was like I'll stay away from them.

00:39:16.000 But then this instructor starts swimming forward, and then my friend is behind her and I'm behind him.

00:39:21.000 And at one point, like I, you know, I'm not good with the paddles.

00:39:25.000 No, the uh flippers?

00:39:27.000 Flippers.

00:39:28.000 Is that fli flippers?

00:39:29.000 Like I don't I I don't know.

00:39:31.000 Some people are just good with them, but like it's kind of like it's it's weird.

00:39:34.000 It's unnatural and unnatural feeling.

00:39:36.000 So I'm not good with them, and I got this fucking tank on me, and you know, everything's tight, you know, and it's like and I'm trying to use the flip prints, and I'm not really catching, like I'm kinda falling behind a little bit, I'm not really doing it great, and then I start to try to do it faster, but then that like spins me a little bit.

00:39:51.000 So now I'm spinning down there and I'm trying to kick out of it, and I like want to communicate to the instructor, and she's in front of my friend swimming forward.

00:40:00.000 And my friends, I'm looking at his ass.

00:40:02.000 I'm like, I'm just like fucking like I'm just like waving my hands like that seems help.

00:40:06.000 Wildly irresponsible.

00:40:07.000 Yeah, like she I don't think she should have led like that.

00:40:09.000 And what she was I would say she was probably 20 feet or ahead of me swimming forward. 0.98

00:40:15.000 And so I at that one point.

00:40:17.000 I was like, this is not like this is this is crazy.

00:40:20.000 She doesn't I can't get help if I need help right now.

00:40:22.000 And then you're panicking.

00:40:23.000 I I did.

00:40:23.000 I panicked.

00:40:24.000 I started breathing heavy.

00:40:25.000 Of course.

00:40:26.000 And I had to like literally just control you know, bring myself back down.

00:40:29.000 Let me Ask you this.

00:40:30.000 Um they don't give you any like tests to make sure that you're good at scuba diving?

00:40:37.000 Yeah, we we went in the water first.

00:40:39.000 Right.

00:40:39.000 Like in the shallow area.

00:40:41.000 And like we did like some exercises and drills or whatever, and they explained the signs.

00:40:45.000 Uh-huh.

00:40:46.000 Did you what's gonna happen?

00:40:47.000 Did you tell her you're claustrophobic?

00:40:49.000 I don't I don't think I did.

00:40:51.000 When you say you're claustrophobic, like are you self-diagnosed, or did you go to a mental hospital?

00:40:55.000 Self.

00:40:56.000 You went crazy.

00:40:57.000 But if how did you what do you where do you get that from?

00:41:01.000 Like where do where do where do I think or why I think I have astrophobic what makes you uh because I've been in scenarios in confined small spaces where I couldn't get out or I didn't have a lot of mobility and I literally had a panic, like we have a panic attack.

00:41:13.000 Like I stuck my heart starts beating out my chest.

00:41:15.000 I feel like I can't breathe.

00:41:16.000 So it's like a an anxiety of being confined to a small space.

00:41:20.000 Yeah, like when I was um uh I did an MRI.

00:41:24.000 Oh.

00:41:25.000 That was like I That's very claustrophobic.

00:41:27.000 Started beating out of my chest and there was one time on a plane a long time ago.

00:41:30.000 I don't like to fly either.

00:41:32.000 So that combined with like I was in a row, like a really tight row, like crammed in.

00:41:37.000 And I just I don't know, I just it's it's happened uh a few times in my life where in the like the the the like the back row of like a a like a a van where like it was closed in like and I couldn't j uh anywhere I can't get right out.

00:41:50.000 And one time I was in a stretcher and I um they like lock you like they strap you in.

00:41:56.000 That I can't take that.

00:41:57.000 I can't take it.

00:41:58.000 What happened to you?

00:42:00.000 I was in a car accident.

00:42:01.000 Yeah, I was fine.

00:42:02.000 I was okay.

00:42:03.000 But they just precautionary put you in his judge.

00:42:05.000 I was I was to tell you the truth, I saw I was dri I was driving and a guy ran a red uh stop sign and like plowed fast and plowed into me.

00:42:14.000 I was a teenager, and my best friend was driving behind me, so he watched it happen.

00:42:18.000 So he called right away.

00:42:20.000 But I I guess I kinda like I don't remember.

00:42:22.000 I got hit and then I remember um my girlfriend at the time crying and I I remember talking to her, but I have no vision.

00:42:30.000 I just hear the words.

00:42:31.000 And I remember like I was hugging her and I could feel her tears, and then the next thing I remember in my mind was that I I was in a stretcher on the floor and I woke up and like the ambulance was there and everything was there.

00:42:44.000 That's the next thing I remember.

00:42:45.000 But I'm telling this guy I'm in this fucking thing, and he has me on the floor behind the ambulance, and I'm right by the exhaust pipe.

00:42:52.000 Oh my god.

00:42:52.000 I'm just laying on the and the things like just right by the I'm like, can somebody fucking move me from away from the exhaust pipe?

00:42:58.000 That's hilarious.

00:42:59.000 You know?

00:42:59.000 But uh I couldn't when I'm c when I'm held down like that and confined and I can't move, it's like I don't know, I just feel like I can't breathe.

00:43:06.000 Right.

00:43:06.000 I it's I start to freak out.

00:43:08.000 My mom has it, so I don't know if it's like I don't know if it's I just wonder what the difference between that and general anxiety is.

00:43:13.000 Because if you have general anxiety, I would imagine you would get claustrophobic too.

00:43:17.000 So maybe that's what it is.

00:43:18.000 Well, I'm just telling you what I feel in confined spaces.

00:43:21.000 Oh, the reason why I'm asking is because I think we have excuse me.

00:43:24.000 I think we have gym genetic memory of bad stuff.

00:43:28.000 I think that's why some people are allergic or or are terrified of snakes.

00:43:32.000 Some people tear like there's a thing, a real thing, a phidiophobia or arachnophobia.

00:43:36.000 See spider some people like they go into a hot panic.

00:43:40.000 It's different than anything else.

00:43:41.000 Right.

00:43:41.000 And I think there's something like in the genes from you know, millions of years of evolution where someone down the line died or almost died because of one of these fucking spiders or one of these snakes, or you saw someone get killed by a snake and you see them and you fucking lock up.

00:43:59.000 How do you explain the phobia of clowns?

00:44:01.000 Well, I mean John Wayne Gacy.

00:44:05.000 Yeah.

00:44:05.000 There's there's a bunch of somewhere along the line You can't see their real face.

00:44:09.000 Yeah it's scary.

00:44:10.000 Yeah.

00:44:10.000 It's scary to not be able to see someone's real face.

00:44:13.000 Yeah.

00:44:13.000 Which was like one of the most fucked up things we did to kids during the pandemic is make everybody wear masks.

00:44:18.000 Because kids are in school and they're not getting facial expressions.

00:44:21.000 Right.

00:44:22.000 They're not getting them from teachers, they're not getting them from their classmates.

00:44:25.000 It's weird.

00:44:25.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:44:26.000 That's weird.

00:44:27.000 That's not good for human development.

00:44:28.000 Yeah, that was the norm.

00:44:30.000 There's something, especially as kids, we don't like if we can't figure your face out.

00:44:35.000 I can't see your whole face.

00:44:36.000 You're wearing paint, so I'm not getting the right signals.

00:44:39.000 You got a rubber nose on, you got weird fucking crazy hair.

00:44:42.000 I'm like, I don't know if you're cool or not cool.

00:44:44.000 Right.

00:44:44.000 Right?

00:44:45.000 If you're a regular guy, and I could tell if you're creepy.

00:44:48.000 I can tell like this guy's got weird energy.

00:44:49.000 Let's get out of here.

00:44:50.000 Yeah.

00:44:50.000 But a clown's like, hello, boys and girls.

00:44:53.000 You're allowed to act like in this weird silly way.

00:44:59.000 Full on demonic psychopath that you could hide as a clown.

00:45:03.000 And you can hide with that language.

00:45:04.000 That clown language.

00:45:06.000 Hi, boys and girls, would you like to see a trick?

00:45:08.000 Meanwhile, you're thinking about cutting that kid up in your basement.

00:45:11.000 Yeah.

00:45:11.000 You know?

00:45:12.000 And that those are real human beings.

00:45:14.000 Yeah.

00:45:14.000 Do you remember when clowns like for a minute were like in the news everywhere because there was like a trend that clowns were terrorizing towns?

00:45:22.000 It was like five years, like maybe meh less than ten years ago.

00:45:25.000 No.

00:45:25.000 Oh my god.

00:45:26.000 So where I'm from in Staten Island, we had the Staten Island clown.

00:45:29.000 Oh no.

00:45:30.000 And this there was a clown just showing up in public spaces and events just watching people and then like recessing like back into the night and it would make appearances and started making the papers.

00:45:41.000 I do remember that.

00:45:42.000 Oh, it's wild.

00:45:44.000 Was it around the time that it came out though?

00:45:46.000 I don't think it was it.

00:45:47.000 Do you but but the book Maybe it was terrifier?

00:45:50.000 Oh, that late.

00:45:51.000 Yeah, it was.

00:45:52.000 What year was this?

00:45:53.000 I was I think it was like I would say I would put it out ten years.

00:45:56.000 Okay.

00:45:56.000 It was 2016.

00:45:57.000 Okay.

00:45:58.000 But then other places, like other people started doing it.

00:46:01.000 And then like and then it was like clowns or that was kind of fun, actually though.

00:46:04.000 I do remember that.

00:46:05.000 I I like that.

00:46:06.000 I like that.

00:46:07.000 I like the idea that there might be a clown that would go out one night for like the guy.

00:46:13.000 Sam or something like that.

00:46:14.000 People like, if you're going out tonight, look out for the clowns.

00:46:18.000 It is weird that like there's always been throughout history this Jack the Ripper.

00:46:22.000 There's always been these people.

00:46:23.000 In Austin, they say there's a new strangles.

00:46:25.000 They don't know who Jack the Ripper is, right?

00:46:27.000 I feel like there's some new but there's always like a story.

00:46:30.000 New evidence reveals the true identity of Jack the Ripper.

00:46:34.000 You never know what's just clickbait bullshit, and you click on it some nonsense website that tells you they found Jack the Ripper.

00:46:40.000 So you're not gonna get me every time.

00:46:42.000 I just clicked on something that said that uh Christian Bale was Banksy.

00:46:48.000 Nah.

00:46:49.000 I s there was an article.

00:46:50.000 Well he's an amazing actor.

00:46:51.000 That guy can do anything.

00:46:53.000 It can't be it's bullshit, but I but I was it would be fun if it was.

00:46:56.000 Yeah.

00:46:56.000 He's an interesting dude.

00:46:57.000 You know, he drives like a 1983 Toyota Tundra or a 93.

00:47:02.000 Really?

00:47:02.000 Why?

00:47:02.000 Not even a tundra, a Tacoma.

00:47:04.000 He's a weird dude.

00:47:05.000 Just like this is all I need.

00:47:07.000 I drive this.

00:47:08.000 He's got a regular Toyota pickup truck.

00:47:10.000 I shouldn't have like doxxed him.

00:47:11.000 Now people are gonna be looking at it.

00:47:14.000 Yeah, look at him.

00:47:16.000 Dude, he's not gonna find it.

00:47:18.000 He's got a tundra.

00:47:19.000 I mean this thing was April Fool's.

00:47:21.000 What's that?

00:47:21.000 Banksy thing was April Fool's.

00:47:23.000 Oh, was it?

00:47:23.000 The Banksy thing was.

00:47:24.000 Someone sent me a link.

00:47:25.000 I didn't even know.

00:47:26.000 I wouldn't be shocked if it was, though.

00:47:27.000 You know what I'm saying?

00:47:28.000 Like as good as that guy is, he could kind of do whatever he wants.

00:47:32.000 You know, when you get to like that level of actor, those are like weird, exceptional humans.

00:47:37.000 They don't come along that often.

00:47:39.000 Yeah.

00:47:39.000 You know, the Gary Oldman's the Daniel Day Lewis's, there's these people that like become another person.

00:47:44.000 Yeah.

00:47:45.000 Those weirdos, they could do whatever they want.

00:47:47.000 If he wanted to be Banksy, I would go, okay.

00:47:50.000 Yeah, it's not like Banksy's making mona leases everywhere.

00:47:53.000 Yeah, man.

00:47:54.000 Yeah, they're playing with different rules.

00:47:56.000 Yeah.

00:47:56.000 I think.

00:47:57.000 But I was I remember being I was disappointed when I found out it was him.

00:48:00.000 Because like, you know, it's like, ah, I don't know.

00:48:02.000 I want it to be mysterious.

00:48:03.000 It's kind of amazing that nobody knows who Banksy is.

00:48:05.000 Yeah.

00:48:06.000 I mean, it it's really weird, actually.

00:48:08.000 Did you see that uh doc that oh exit through the gift shop?

00:48:12.000 I didn't.

00:48:13.000 It's pretty interesting.

00:48:14.000 It's it's like it it follows other artists.

00:48:17.000 His name's like Mr. He has a moniker that he goes by, and like people thought that he was Banksy.

00:48:23.000 And so like it spends the whole thing like following him, but it turns out he's not.

00:48:28.000 But it was it was a fun watch, but it was like uh it's it's just wild to me that after all this time uh in the age we're living in now, nothing has gotten like everyone like how many people know who he is?

00:48:43.000 Like, you know, how close to the vest is his identity?

00:48:45.000 Well, he would have to be a truly brilliant person to keep it together.

00:48:50.000 That would be likely.

00:48:52.000 Right.

00:48:52.000 But even then, you know, like fuck it, I'm coming out with this.

00:48:55.000 You guys are assholes. 0.80

00:48:56.000 Yeah, yeah, right.

00:48:57.000 You know, like one guy in the band that decides to leave.

00:49:00.000 It's gotta come out.

00:49:00.000 Or his girlfriend, you should go to the press.

00:49:02.000 You could get a lot of money if you go to the press.

00:49:04.000 It's gonna come out eventually.

00:49:05.000 Just come out.

00:49:06.000 Listen, sell your story before they don't want to buy your story.

00:49:09.000 We need the money.

00:49:10.000 Like, oh, should I do this?

00:49:11.000 I didn't know you did voices.

00:49:13.000 I did that one.

00:49:13.000 That's a good one.

00:49:14.000 That was pretty good.

00:49:15.000 If I close my eyes, that's good.

00:49:17.000 Sell it.

00:49:18.000 Sell it.

00:49:18.000 Yeah.

00:49:21.000 No, I don't do that.

00:49:22.000 Mark, it's sixty-five thousand dollars.

00:49:24.000 Do you have sixty-five thousand dollars?

00:49:26.000 You don't.

00:49:27.000 But it's gonna be worth nothing.

00:49:29.000 The next thing you know, the band's breaking up.

00:49:33.000 That's funny, dude.

00:49:34.000 That always happens.

00:49:36.000 I w I went to um I went to I was invited to this brunch in England.

00:49:41.000 And it was uh it was the guy um man, I don't he was a descendant of uh uh uh who's the who's the uh the the uh the guy where it's like oh um like he what you when you want to fuck when you when you're when you're like when you're thinking about your mom was that guy the the the the the what he's talking about yeah I know I know I'm literally having a stroke I have no idea what you're saying Jamie do you know what he's saying I was he needed a couple more

00:50:12.000 words he wasn't getting to it yeah when you think of your mom that guy who's yeah the guy it's like what's it for freud oh okay yeah so he's i think he's a descendant you're talking about like a baseball player freud is like his i think it's like his like great great grandfather or something and then he also married into like it's the biggest uh mark like publication uh in in the biggest like media company conglomerate in in overseas whatever

00:50:41.000 i forget his name he's super rich famous family that married into another super rich famous family right freud family and then like whoever this is anyway i'm at this person's house okay long story short i don't remember how i got right there i think his where is it it's um it was somewhere in outside of london and it it was unassuming because we walked through row houses through an alley to get to their property and uh i think the daughter of this i'm i

00:51:11.000 feel i'm bad that I I'm forgetting their name because they were gracious hosts and but I did fan the daughter I think was a fan of ours or something and somehow got in touch and we got invited there.

00:51:22.000 It was a weird wild thing.

00:51:25.000 So I I I find myself at this place I didn't I didn't know anyone and I get there and like it was a weird collection of people there.

00:51:31.000 Apparently this guy hosts a brunch forever he's like known for it and he has a lot of friends and a lot of celebrity friends and so there was celebrities and stuff there at this brunch.

00:51:40.000 It was really cool walk in there was all food trucks and stuff and you get into their house and uh I at the time Woody Harrelson was filming a movie in London and it was crazy.

00:51:52.000 It was a one it was a live movie in one shot they tr they rehearsed for this movie for months and months and months and then a live stream into theaters and he acted live and the entire thing was one shot it was like 90 minutes long.

00:52:12.000 Whoa yeah I don't I can't believe it didn't get more press just from the nature of that.

00:52:16.000 That's insane.

00:52:17.000 But um so he was out there for that and so he was at this brunch and I think uh Owen Wilson um was at was also at this brunch how did I forget about this did you do do you recall it now?

00:52:32.000 I'm kind of recalling hearing about it now.

00:52:34.000 Yeah it wasn't any love.

00:52:37.000 No but I I went and saw it and it was on it was really fucking cool.

00:52:40.000 Um so there's I mean there's a lot of different people there Liv Tyler like it just the the guys from Oasis there was just a collection of people there and I found myself they were they had a like a little bond like a escape uh not escape room uh what do you call it safe room and the safe room was just converted it had a ping pong table in I went downstairs I walk into the safe room and Woody Harrelson and I went sort of playing ping pong down there.

00:53:05.000 And I just it was them two a cat and me and I just watched them play ping I don't know them.

00:53:09.000 But wait what I'm getting to this oh so anyway they had Banksys like they had they had a they had a fucking uh man you know I think I need to take a supplement for my I needed to get some ginkgo below me who's who's the artist with like a Picasso they had a Picasso I'm like who's the guy who puts like an eye over here the guy with no ear. 0.99

00:53:30.000 No that's Van Gogh yes they had Banks he's like just in the house like up like that.

00:53:34.000 Like wow that's probably I mean I'm you know that's a million dollars.

00:53:39.000 Yeah probably probably at least I don't know I don't I don't know how much they are but I was like oh wow that's like your own personal Banksy I went over an agent's house once in uh Aspen and this is like a long time ago and uh we were there for they used to have the Aspen Comedy Festival and I was over his house and and I was like oh did his kid make this there's like this painting on the wall and they're like, no, that's uh Chris Bob.

00:54:03.000 Yeah.

00:54:03.000 I go, he paid for that?

00:54:06.000 It looked like tissue.

00:54:07.000 No.

00:54:07.000 This is I'm just saying this to another agent.

00:54:09.000 So it's me and this other agent just shooting the shit over a couple of cocktails.

00:54:12.000 We're laughing.

00:54:13.000 Yeah.

00:54:13.000 But I'm like, for real?

00:54:14.000 And he goes, Yeah, that's worth like $35,000.

00:54:16.000 Like, there's no way that is like a kid did that.

00:54:22.000 It was like pieces of tissue paper glued with some paint splattered on it.

00:54:26.000 It's nuts.

00:54:27.000 I was like, what is this?

00:54:28.000 Do you know the origins of that stuff?

00:54:31.000 They think it was a CIA psy-op.

00:54:34.000 For what?

00:54:35.000 Modern art like that.

00:54:36.000 Come on.

00:54:37.000 Yes.

00:54:37.000 Yeah.

00:54:38.000 There's some evidence that points to the CIA.

00:54:41.000 Like when they just nail a banana to the wall or something like that.

00:54:43.000 Yeah, a little bit of that, but a little bit of like Jackson Pollock.

00:54:46.000 So yeah, I was just splattered.

00:54:47.000 I was gonna bring up Pollock because Stern did that.

00:54:49.000 Do you ever see when Howard did that?

00:54:50.000 He he he was like, I can I can make a Jackson Pollock and you won't know the difference.

00:54:54.000 Uh-huh.

00:54:55.000 And he did it on a sh like did uh he did it and he put it next to each other and nobody knew the difference.

00:54:59.000 Yeah.

00:55:00.000 So what they think is we couldn't compete during the Cold War with the classical artists of Russia.

00:55:07.000 Like there's some incredible painters in Russia at the time, and I'm sure there are now.

00:55:13.000 But we didn't have uh a similar level.

00:55:17.000 We didn't have a Da Vinci over here.

00:55:18.000 We didn't we didn't have someone who could do what they were doing.

00:55:22.000 And so the CIA came up with a plot to popularize nonsense art and make it like really huge and make all these investors want to spend money buying like nonsense art.

00:55:35.000 And apparently there's uh I never would have considered that until I paid attention to all the other shit that they've done over the last, you know, X amount of decades.

00:55:44.000 And I was like, I think that's true.

00:55:46.000 Because it doesn't make sense to me that that stuff would just emerge and all of a sudden be worth millions of dollars.

00:55:51.000 And someone wouldn't figure out exactly what Howard Stern figured out that I can make this on my own.

00:55:55.000 Right.

00:55:55.000 And you could just say it's a Pollock.

00:55:57.000 This is Jackson Pollock, and no one would know.

00:55:59.000 Like, what are we talking about then?

00:56:01.000 We're talking about something that anybody can do.

00:56:03.000 If you look at the Mona Lisa, you're like, well, I can't do that.

00:56:06.000 Right.

00:56:06.000 You know, you you look at, you know, there's a million paintings.

00:56:09.000 You look at it, like, especially today.

00:56:11.000 There's something about the level that people are at today where they're making like photograph realistic paintings.

00:56:15.000 Yeah.

00:56:16.000 Photo realistic paintings.

00:56:18.000 Like that are above and beyond anything's ever emo anyone's ever accomplished in the history of art.

00:56:24.000 But because it looks so realistic, people don't even seem to care.

00:56:27.000 Modern art was the CIA weapon.

00:56:30.000 Spy agency used unwitting artists such as Pollack and De Koonig in a cultural cold war.

00:56:37.000 Isn't that wild?

00:56:38.000 So scroll up to the thing.

00:56:40.000 This is from uh the independent.

00:56:42.000 Oh, you have to support.

00:56:44.000 Oh, okay.

00:56:45.000 Um so the connections are probable.

00:56:49.000 There's a period in the 1950s and nineteen sixties when the great majority of Americans disliked or even despised modern art.

00:56:55.000 President Truman summered up summed up the popular view when he said, if that's art, then I'm a hetenthot.

00:57:02.000 I don't know what that means.

00:57:03.000 Hot and tot.

00:57:04.000 Hot and tot?

00:57:04.000 What's a hot and talk?

00:57:05.000 I don't know, but I'll tell you right now, I'm starting to use that word.

00:57:08.000 Hot and tot.

00:57:09.000 Jamie, Google that word.

00:57:10.000 What's what is that word?

00:57:12.000 Never heard.

00:57:15.000 Sounds like a candy.

00:57:16.000 Like a mic and I think it's a hot and tot.

00:57:21.000 T.O.T. What's a hot and tot?

00:57:26.000 Uh outdated and offensive term historically used by Europeans to refer to I don't know how to say that word, K-H-O-E-K-H-O-E, an indigenous group of nomadic pastoralists from South Africa.

00:57:41.000 Jesus Christ.

00:57:42.000 The president is using that.

00:57:44.000 You want to talk about the world being different?

00:57:47.000 The president was using a slur.

00:57:50.000 Oh my goodness.

00:57:51.000 As for the artists themselves, many were ex-communists and barely acceptable in the America of the McCarthyite era, and certainly not the sort of people normally likely to receive US government backing.

00:58:01.000 So why the CIA support them?

00:58:03.000 Because in the propaganda war with Soviet Union, this new artistic movement could be held up as proof of the creativity, the intellectual freedom, and the cultural power of the US Russian art.

00:58:14.000 Oh, of the US, rather.

00:58:15.000 Russian art strapped into the communist ideal ideological straight jacket, could not compete.

00:58:21.000 Hilarious.

00:58:22.000 So because their artists were better, we decided to come up with some nonsense art and make people think that was the shit.

00:58:29.000 And they and it it worked.

00:58:31.000 It worked.

00:58:32.000 But are we saying that they found those artists and prop them up?

00:58:35.000 No, the the artists are not.

00:58:38.000 No, no, the artists already existed, but the CIA propped them up and pushed them out as being amazing.

00:58:44.000 And they did it in an effective way.

00:58:46.000 And look, if they're all these like super duper rich people are involved or closely connected to the CIA, all they would have to do is have art exhibits at their house and tell everybody how amazing this guy is.

00:58:58.000 Yeah and how mind blowing this piece is and they'll all agree.

00:59:02.000 That's how art works in a general sense now anyway.

00:59:04.000 It's like there are people at the top that dictate a lot of this stuff.

00:59:07.000 You know what I mean?

00:59:08.000 That's well for sure.

00:59:09.000 But there's also just talent.

00:59:10.000 You know someone's really good like all they have to do have is an Instagram page if they're really talented.

00:59:15.000 Oh yeah yeah but I'm saying the art world and the and like the the I art as a commodity and that kind of stuff like you know like the bottom can fall out at any time of that just like anything else.

00:59:23.000 It's like I guess but people always want art.

00:59:26.000 But the thing is like what I'm getting at is nobody wanted that art.

00:59:28.000 Yeah.

00:59:29.000 And then all of a sudden it became worth millions.

00:59:30.000 And it became worth millions because of the CIA.

00:59:33.000 Yeah that's wild.

00:59:34.000 They mind fuck the American people into believing that terrible art is really good.

00:59:38.000 That's wild.

00:59:39.000 Wild.

00:59:39.000 Yeah.

00:59:40.000 No I because I just read an article recently about like how um art as investment like there's been like a huge change where a lot of artists that were being pushed and were really hot by galleries and this and that like just years ago and selling an X amount like their their stuff's not worth anything right now.

00:59:58.000 Wow.

00:59:58.000 Yeah.

00:59:59.000 Wow I wonder why well when the economy starts going I would imagine that people stop buying art right like luxury items shit you don't need art.

01:00:08.000 Yeah.

01:00:09.000 It wasn't I forget but it wasn't it wasn't economy based.

01:00:13.000 It was like it was like the the trend like the you know the trend within that that world or whatever.

01:00:19.000 It's like I it's always weird to me how people put a price tag on that stuff.

01:00:22.000 I was in uh excuse me I was in Venice recently and we went to uh I guess it's the Guggenheim gallery the Guggenheim family gallery.

01:00:31.000 It's a house that's like it's a gallery that's like on the water.

01:00:34.000 You like you pull up in one of those little boats you get off and you're in the gallery.

01:00:39.000 And it's priceless art.

01:00:41.000 It was one person's collection.

01:00:43.000 So one super rich lady put together I I think is it called the Peggy Guggenheim in Venice I might be making that up.

01:00:52.000 But anyway it's a lady a very wealthy lady who really loved art.

01:00:57.000 Is that it?

01:00:58.000 Oh what a memory and she has this incredible collection where you're like how much did she spend like this is like a billion dollars in art.

01:01:09.000 It's nuts man.

01:01:11.000 What is that?

01:01:12.000 That's the front page of their website oh that's an exhibit that they have there.

01:01:16.000 But it's all there's some modern stuff but there's a lot of like priceless shit.

01:01:21.000 Yeah.

01:01:21.000 Just unbelievable collection.

01:01:23.000 You collect no nothing.

01:01:26.000 I collect pool cues.

01:01:27.000 Yeah.

01:01:29.000 Nothing I have some art.

01:01:30.000 Yeah.

01:01:30.000 But I have friends that are artists.

01:01:32.000 Well this place is filled with art obviously but but like I think of my house very differently in this place.

01:01:38.000 I definitely collect art.

01:01:39.000 Okay.

01:01:39.000 I love art for here.

01:01:40.000 But for my house I don't have anything.

01:01:42.000 Okay.

01:01:42.000 I don't collect anything I started.

01:01:44.000 But this is this is like I fe I feel like the studio is a totally different thing.

01:01:49.000 Like this this is like it's not my house.

01:01:52.000 It's like a showcase you know like I like to put cool stuff in here.

01:01:55.000 Yeah.

01:01:56.000 Like I would if my house is like this it's a too chaotic.

01:01:59.000 It's too weird.

01:01:59.000 Yeah yeah yeah that's a creative space.

01:02:02.000 It's cool.

01:02:02.000 It's cool in here.

01:02:03.000 I have a few pieces at home from this guy Greg Overton he's a friend of mine and he does Native American art that is just spectacular he does these huge pieces like this you know like six eight foot by six foot giant Native American faces that are just the I saw him for the first time I was in Park City just going through like the little town and they had a gallery and we were walking around like oh let's go look at the gallery.

01:02:28.000 And it was just like right away I was like whoa pull up one of his photos.

01:02:33.000 If you can pull up the one that I have but I I stare at that motherfucker every day. 0.99

01:02:38.000 Yeah you know it's totally different.

01:02:40.000 You know it's like I just think what it this was like this is a very accurate representation of a real person that lived here 200 years ago.

01:02:48.000 And like what is that dude's life like that's what that one's in my wall.

01:02:53.000 God how good is this guy?

01:02:55.000 Wow.

01:02:55.000 Well what what what is what is that oil?

01:02:58.000 What is it?

01:02:58.000 Oh yeah it's oil paint.

01:03:00.000 Yeah.

01:03:00.000 Oil or acrylic or I mean I I don't know what exactly he uses, but it's painting.

01:03:05.000 So like all like realistic.

01:03:07.000 Oh, so well, it's just really good, man.

01:03:09.000 That's one of the ones that I have, but I have another one.

01:03:11.000 This dude who has white paint on his face and this crazy scar on his face.

01:03:16.000 It's like his stuff is first of all, the dude like loves that's it.

01:03:21.000 The one with above it with the uh feathers, the white one.

01:03:24.000 Yeah, that's it.

01:03:25.000 Make that a little bigger. 0.58

01:03:27.000 That one I see when I'm walking down the hall every day.

01:03:29.000 Oh shit.

01:03:30.000 That's like the first thing I see in the morning is that motherfucker staring at me.

01:03:34.000 Wow.

01:03:35.000 Because I, you know, uh That's kind of powerful, dude.

01:03:38.000 It's so powerful.

01:03:39.000 Yeah.

01:03:40.000 I love that painting.

01:03:40.000 Uh Greg's a friend too, and he's a cool motherfucker.

01:03:44.000 But that um that to me represents there was a real human that looked exactly like that walking around 200 years ago, had no idea what was gonna happen to this country in just a short amount of time.

01:03:59.000 Yeah.

01:03:59.000 And this dude in, you know, 18, 10, is just out here, lived his whole life out here like this.

01:04:06.000 Yeah, man.

01:04:06.000 Living under the stars, following the buffalo around.

01:04:10.000 It's like it there's something really powerful about knowing that people used to live like that that that recent recently, yeah.

01:04:18.000 So recent.

01:04:19.000 And now he hangs right by your powder room.

01:04:23.000 He's at the end of the hallway.

01:04:25.000 Right when I get up on purpose.

01:04:27.000 I want to walk, I want to walk towards it.

01:04:28.000 That's serious.

01:04:30.000 Like I the stuff I've collected is a little bit more like vibrant and a little bit more like, you know, not so photorealistic and stuff.

01:04:36.000 Like I was gonna tell you someone I thought you'd like is this artist, Jordy Kerwick, as I have a piece of.

01:04:41.000 He's I just I I found him on my own during the pandemic.

01:04:44.000 I bought a piece of his art, and I really loved it.

01:04:47.000 And then like what does he do?

01:04:49.000 What kind of stuff?

01:04:50.000 Uh I mean, I guess uh it's kind of like well, his style has changed.

01:04:54.000 I bought like a still piece that was like uh but now he's moved into this really funky, cool, like lizard, like um like oh.

01:05:04.000 So What is that?

01:05:05.000 That's so this is some cool shit, right?

01:05:06.000 Yeah.

01:05:07.000 Oh he's awesome.

01:05:08.000 He does sculptures too.

01:05:10.000 From Australia, I believe, but he lives in France.

01:05:11.000 He does sculptures, yeah.

01:05:13.000 He's fry he blew up too, and he's like, he's the nicest guy.

01:05:16.000 So like a couple of years, like a few years after I bought his piece, I saw him like something of mine on Instagram, and I was like, Oh, he because I I zoomed with him before I bought it, I guess just to talk about it for a minute.

01:05:27.000 And I thought maybe he just fought like followed me or knew who I was because I bought his art, but he didn't.

01:05:32.000 He just knew me through comedy.

01:05:34.000 And so I hit him up and I go, hey man, I saw you like something of mine.

01:05:37.000 Like, you know, I bought something from you, right?

01:05:39.000 And he's like, I have no idea, no.

01:05:40.000 And it's like, yeah, we took we zoomed.

01:05:42.000 I I he is like, and he's like, no, no, I just am a fan.

01:05:45.000 I'm like, dude, your stuff is amazing.

01:05:47.000 And this guy was so nice, he ended up sending me more artwork, like he shipped me more artwork of his, and it's like expensive.

01:05:54.000 And he just he just was so generous.

01:05:56.000 He sent me more stuff.

01:05:57.000 Oh, that's awesome.

01:05:58.000 This guy's dope, yeah, yeah.

01:05:59.000 That looks like where the wild things are.

01:06:02.000 How fucking dope is that, right?

01:06:03.000 Very good.

01:06:04.000 His style has changed so much too, and it's like I want to get another piece.

01:06:07.000 I'm like, I part of me is like, I don't want to if I'm gonna spend yeah, if I'm gonna get it, I want to like you know, get try to vary it up, but I like his stuff so much that I just kind of want to like he does weird shit too, yeah.

01:06:19.000 It's creepy.

01:06:19.000 Yeah.

01:06:20.000 Yeah, art is awesome, man.

01:06:21.000 It's like it's got so few limitations.

01:06:24.000 You could do whatever you want, you paint whatever you want, sculpt whatever you want.

01:06:28.000 You know, and and you have that thing in your house and you get to stare at it, and it gives you like a whole different sense of life.

01:06:33.000 Yeah.

01:06:34.000 Like somebody made that.

01:06:35.000 So this popped out of someone's imagination.

01:06:40.000 My cough button still is it still broken?

01:06:42.000 Let's try it.

01:06:44.000 Seems like it's working now.

01:06:46.000 You uh when the whole thing's not out, it acts a little weird.

01:06:49.000 Oh, that's what it is?

01:06:50.000 Yeah.

01:06:50.000 Okay.

01:06:51.000 How good are you with a bow and arrow?

01:06:53.000 Pretty good.

01:06:54.000 How good?

01:06:55.000 Like I bow hunt.

01:06:56.000 Right.

01:06:57.000 Yeah, I practice.

01:06:58.000 But I didn't know every day.

01:07:00.000 Yeah, yeah, you have to.

01:07:02.000 All right, so if I I mean I um I shouldn't say have to every day, but you have to practice a lot.

01:07:07.000 You have to be really accurate.

01:07:09.000 But like back in the day when they battled with bow and arrow.

01:07:12.000 Mm-hmm.

01:07:12.000 How what skill level were those guys?

01:07:14.000 Oh, that's a totally different kind of archery.

01:07:16.000 Right.

01:07:17.000 So that kind of archery is how much of that was like letting it fly, and how much of it was like I'm a sniper, I'm gonna like it.

01:07:22.000 Oh no, they were good.

01:07:23.000 Yeah.

01:07:23.000 Guys are good.

01:07:24.000 My friend Aaron Schneider, he's such a good bow hunter that he decided he wants to hunt with a recurve, like a regular bow for a while.

01:07:32.000 Because like he What's the difference?

01:07:34.000 It's way harder.

01:07:35.000 Okay.

01:07:35.000 Way harder to be accurate.

01:07:37.000 Like a Robin Hood bow?

01:07:38.000 Yeah, Robin Hood bow.

01:07:39.000 A regular bow.

01:07:40.000 Yeah, he killed everything with it.

01:07:41.000 He killed bears, he killed deer, elk, everything.

01:07:44.000 He's like a professional hunter.

01:07:46.000 He's like a like a world-class hunter, ex-military guy, got into hunting, he's a fucking beast.

01:07:51.000 Yeah.

01:07:52.000 And when bow hunting, which is one of the hardest things to do becomes so easy that you want to pick up a regular bow and go shoot that.

01:07:58.000 That shows you what type of human you're talking about.

01:08:00.000 But he can group like into like a softball sized lump at 45 yards.

01:08:06.000 He just fires them in with super accurate with that thing.

01:08:10.000 But so if I I tried once, I was on vacation and I'm like, I'm good with a bow and arrow.

01:08:14.000 I know how to shoot a bow and arrow.

01:08:16.000 I do it all the time.

01:08:16.000 I was hitting them in the ass, hitting them in the neck.

01:08:18.000 I was hitting them all over the place.

01:08:20.000 Not at a human, not an animal, rather, it's foam target.

01:08:23.000 We're shooting recur, and I was like, I'll be able to do that.

01:08:25.000 It was like a thing that you do.

01:08:26.000 You shot ski.

01:08:27.000 It was at an island resort.

01:08:28.000 It was pretty fun.

01:08:29.000 And then you shot skeet and then you got to shoot these uh recurves, and I was like, Oh, I got this.

01:08:35.000 I was terrible.

01:08:35.000 I didn't really totally differ technique.

01:08:38.000 Yeah, it didn't carry sights.

01:08:40.000 It carried over a little.

01:08:42.000 I mean I hit the target, but I w I this there's no way I was accurate.

01:08:45.000 So if I gave chase if I ran from you and you had to get like if I get like could you take me out if I'm like if I'm running around like a moving target?

01:08:55.000 Like it's well, it depends on how far away you are.

01:08:57.000 Okay.

01:08:58.000 You know, because the arrows go in two hundred and seventy-nine feet a second.

01:09:04.000 Uh a second.

01:09:05.000 A second.

01:09:06.000 So what's that in miles?

01:09:07.000 I don't know.

01:09:08.000 But that's what my when I look at my range finder.

01:09:11.000 I'm just doing quick math, but I think that's a billion miles an hour.

01:09:14.000 I have to enter in and my my range finder, I enter in how fast the arrow's going.

01:09:18.000 Yeah.

01:09:19.000 Enter in how fast the arrow's going, how much the arrow weighs, and it gives me like a very precise measurement of where my arrow is gonna be at the top of its flight.

01:09:27.000 So when I range something, I use a range laser range finder.

01:09:31.000 It's called a full draw, loophole makes it.

01:09:33.000 And uh when I click on the button, it gives me the distance, so I'll say like fifty three yards, but it also gives me the height of my arrow because it's measure I've entered in the speed of my arrow and the weight of my arrow and the the feet per second it goes.

01:09:48.000 So you're going from home plate to home plate to center field in a second and a half.

01:09:52.000 It's so fast.

01:09:52.000 It's like shh you barely keep your eyes on it.

01:09:55.000 See, and then mine is not as fast as other guys.

01:09:58.000 Like uh, I have a friend of mine, my friend Josh Jones, he's just put together a bow that I think goes three hundred and forty feet a second.

01:10:06.000 But he's a big tall guy, and when you're uh a taller person, you have a a longer draw length and you'll get more speed out of the bow.

01:10:14.000 I can't wrap my head around the speed of a bow.

01:10:18.000 Like very fast.

01:10:20.000 Like I said, if you were at home the way I'm thinking of it.

01:10:22.000 200 136, 340 is 232 miles per hour.

01:10:27.000 232 miles an hour?

01:10:29.000 That's crazy.

01:10:30.000 That's insane.

01:10:31.000 It's so fast, dude.

01:10:32.000 That's the way I'm thinking of it.

01:10:33.000 If you're at home plate, I'm at center field, and you shoot your arrow at me, I have a second, one second to move out of the way.

01:10:40.000 His arrow's going 231.82 miles an hour.

01:10:43.000 That's bananas.

01:10:45.000 And there's people that karate chop those. 0.96

01:10:48.000 Not really.

01:10:48.000 Not that.

01:10:49.000 You kind of see a sl uh a regular okay, you got a long bow, which is probably the slowest, and then you have recurves.

01:10:57.000 Recurves, I don't know if the Mongolians invented them or if the Mongols invented them.

01:11:03.000 But the Mongols had the strongest known bows.

01:11:07.000 They had bows that take a hundred and sixty pounds to draw back.

01:11:11.000 So much so that like some of their skeletons were disfigured.

01:11:15.000 Wow.

01:11:16.000 Because they had so much time pulling in one direction that their whole body was like contorted in that shape.

01:11:22.000 Chiropractor would have cleaned up back then. 0.99

01:11:23.000 But those guys were s I don't think chiropractors are real.

01:11:26.000 But uh but those but those guys were super accurate.

01:11:30.000 But you'd have to do it every day.

01:11:32.000 If you do it every day, it's like it's like a pitcher, right?

01:11:34.000 Like if you ask me to throw a strike, who knows what's gonna happen.

01:11:39.000 I might not even go near the plate.

01:11:41.000 I don't throw a ball very often.

01:11:42.000 Not since you started doing martial arts.

01:11:44.000 But I mean, but the point is like even if you did, you'd have to do it over and over and over again to be able to throw a strike in a game against a real good batter, right?

01:11:51.000 Yeah.

01:11:52.000 That's what these guys are doing with bows and arrows.

01:11:53.000 Right.

01:11:54.000 They they're getting to that point where they it's just like a throwing a ball.

01:11:57.000 They know exactly how far it is, exactly where the arrow's gonna go at that distance.

01:12:02.000 They have a feel because they're doing it every day.

01:12:04.000 But you have to do that every day.

01:12:06.000 The kind of archery I do, you don't have to do it at as much.

01:12:10.000 It probably should do it every day.

01:12:12.000 But mine is like I'm dialing this sight out to the exact yardage.

01:12:16.000 I'm I've got like a fiber optic pin that's sitting over the spot.

01:12:20.000 Like I know exactly where it's gonna be.

01:12:22.000 It's super high tech.

01:12:23.000 Yeah.

01:12:23.000 And then you know exactly where the arrow's gonna be at every spot of the way if you shoot it straight.

01:12:29.000 How long because of all that, is it more about understanding it to be accurate, or is there also still like you gotta be steady and everything?

01:12:38.000 I mean, obviously.

01:12:38.000 You have to be you have to just do it so brief that it becomes a part of you.

01:12:43.000 It's like you know, when when you were playing basketball, I'm sure there were times when you're fucking around with your friends where you just hit a flow.

01:12:50.000 You just hit a flow and you start to get away.

01:12:52.000 That was right around my thirteenth point.

01:12:54.000 But you know what I mean when you're with your friends, not with your ass kicked by Dominicans, but when you're just hanging out with your boys, every now and then you'll catch a flow, right? 0.99

01:13:03.000 Where you feel it and you just know the ball.

01:13:05.000 What what everything else is it's like taking that and just doing it all day long until you can do it at any time you want.

01:13:14.000 Sure.

01:13:15.000 You're always in that flow.

01:13:16.000 So how long did it take you to feel like oh I know what I'm doing, or oh, I I've I have a marked improvement right now.

01:13:22.000 It just takes it took years.

01:13:23.000 Years years of practice.

01:13:25.000 That's wild.

01:13:26.000 Yeah.

01:13:26.000 So years of just like not hitting No, you always hit the target, but not consistently.

01:13:31.000 So you know, like I'd be in my backyard, and I used to have a 45 yard target, and I was pretty good at 45 yards.

01:13:37.000 I could get most of them in the spot that I wanted to hit.

01:13:40.000 Yeah.

01:13:40.000 But every now and then one would go left, one would go right.

01:13:43.000 Now they're all going in there.

01:13:45.000 Now, 45 yards for me is like zip zip zip zip.

01:13:48.000 I'll st I'll ruin arrows because I'm stacking them on top of each other.

01:13:51.000 But if I go out to like eighty-five yards, then things spread out because then all of your movement is magnified.

01:13:58.000 So the key is it's like any little variation, little twitch to the left to the right, over the course of 85 yards, it's gonna vary six inches left or right, maybe.

01:14:07.000 Right.

01:14:08.000 Whereas at 45 would just be like a little bit, you know, and you'd think you're still dead on.

01:14:12.000 And it's it just magnifies all the flaws in your technique.

01:14:15.000 So it's like a you lose yourself in it because while when you're at full draw, and I'm not I'm not even talking about bow hunting, I'm just talking about target archery.

01:14:25.000 When you're at full draw and you're really trying to hit that target, you'd have no room for anything else.

01:14:30.000 There's no room in your your mind for your your bills or an argument you had with a business partner or fucking tickets you haven't paid.

01:14:38.000 None of there's no room.

01:14:40.000 Everything goes away.

01:14:41.000 It cleans the mind because it requires all of your focus.

01:14:45.000 Yeah.

01:14:46.000 That's the best part of it.

01:14:47.000 That's the best part of it.

01:14:48.000 Everything after that, it just becomes like everything else.

01:14:51.000 It becomes like a vehicle for you to like express yourself, whether it's learning how to play a guitar, it's shooting a bow, playing pool, playing basketball.

01:15:00.000 It's like you're just finding a vehicle for you to express your spirit.

01:15:04.000 You have a let go of an arrow and like a bird, like Randy Jackson.

01:15:10.000 You ever see the Randy Jackson?

01:15:11.000 That was nuts.

01:15:12.000 Birds and that feathers.

01:15:14.000 Fucking that guy was a house.

01:15:15.000 That guy threw heat.

01:15:17.000 He was like seven foot one.

01:15:18.000 He was so big.

01:15:20.000 He was a gangly guy.

01:15:21.000 Fucking bird exploded.

01:15:23.000 Yeah.

01:15:24.000 It was perfect.

01:15:24.000 It was like the universe threw us a bone.

01:15:27.000 Right?

01:15:27.000 Like the universe, like, wasn't he something fucked up?

01:15:30.000 Yeah, that's fine.

01:15:30.000 Yeah.

01:15:31.000 Like every now and then the universe does that.

01:15:33.000 Live TV.

01:15:34.000 You just continue.

01:15:35.000 Yeah.

01:15:35.000 There's feathers on the floor, but that's it's like a Looney Tune card.

01:15:43.000 Boom! 0.99

01:15:44.000 Oh my god.

01:15:44.000 Yo, that video.

01:15:46.000 Disintegrated.

01:15:47.000 That video is nuts.

01:15:49.000 And he's a lefty too, son.

01:15:53.000 Look at the slow-mo.

01:15:56.000 That bird made.

01:15:57.000 God, man.

01:15:58.000 What a mistake that bird made.

01:15:59.000 It's just crazy that it didn't just like kill the bird, but knocked every single feather loose.

01:16:06.000 You can just cook that thing.

01:16:07.000 Every single feather.

01:16:09.000 Put it right on the fire.

01:16:10.000 It's like it's pre-plugged.

01:16:12.000 It's like when you get into like an accident, like your shoes and socks come off.

01:16:14.000 You know, like it's like every feather went.

01:16:17.000 Oh my god.

01:16:18.000 Let me see when uh something about lefties, too.

01:16:21.000 Yeah.

01:16:22.000 I think lefties learn things better than righties.

01:16:25.000 I know a lot of lefties that are like really good at shit.

01:16:28.000 It seems like the lefties that are like really good, they're like exceptionally good.

01:16:32.000 Weird, like oddly good.

01:16:35.000 Yeah.

01:16:35.000 I think seeing everybody do everything opposite and forcing your brain to adapt to this world where you're writing and you're you're smudging your paper all the time because you're riding the wrong way.

01:16:47.000 It's all weird, right?

01:16:48.000 Yeah.

01:16:49.000 And then you're seeing everybody's doing everything with their right hand and you're doing it with your left, and you're supposed to everything seems wrong to you.

01:16:55.000 Everything's so by doing that, you have to like really think about your movements.

01:16:59.000 So but the left handed comes out early, right?

01:17:01.000 It's like inherent that movement is inherent.

01:17:03.000 It's not like they're working on it.

01:17:05.000 Right.

01:17:05.000 So it's like, I don't know, do they even do they have to think about those things?

01:17:09.000 Or like is it just like coming out?

01:17:10.000 Oh, they definitely do.

01:17:11.000 Yeah.

01:17:11.000 Because everything's reversed.

01:17:12.000 Yeah.

01:17:12.000 Like if someone tries to teach you something, they have to teach you the opposite.

01:17:15.000 It is a right-handed person's game, usually.

01:17:17.000 Like, say if you're a boxing coach and you only fight orthodox.

01:17:21.000 You've only fought orthodox your whole life.

01:17:23.000 And then some kid comes in and he says, I'm left-handed.

01:17:26.000 And you have to decide either gonna teach this kid fucked up and teach him left hand first, which some people actually think is uh actually a benefit.

01:17:33.000 Right.

01:17:33.000 In fact, some great boxers actually fought, like Oscar de La Hoya fought dominant hand first.

01:17:39.000 So there's a few guys that have done that.

01:17:41.000 Okay where they they will if they're right-handed guys with a they'll put their right hand in front.

01:17:45.000 But for the most part, you would want to teach that kid how to fight as a southpaw, which would mean you would have to reverse everything.

01:17:51.000 Right.

01:17:52.000 So if you don't know how to do it the right is off and you're showing some how to d do something, like you're not really so the kids gotta like learn things from his stance and watch you and just duplicate it, like mirror it from the other side.

01:18:08.000 Yeah.

01:18:08.000 And sometimes that just teaches you more about the movement itself because you think about it.

01:18:13.000 Because what like one of the things they say if you really want to learn something, um say if you're like a in a martial arts skill, if you're uh you have a dominant side, like if you're really good at throwing a kick with your right leg.

01:18:23.000 If you throw it and practice it and get it better with your left leg, your right leg will improve as well.

01:18:29.000 Oh, that's interesting.

01:18:29.000 I didn't hear it.

01:18:30.000 Yeah, I don't know.

01:18:31.000 It makes that I feel like, yeah.

01:18:33.000 Because you're kind of Yeah.

01:18:36.000 I I could see how that's it gives you a more comprehensive understanding of what you're doing.

01:18:41.000 And they say that about pool too.

01:18:42.000 Like, I can't really play with my left hand.

01:18:44.000 I can make like simple shots with my left hand, but there's guys that can just switch hands.

01:18:49.000 The ambidestrous people are like probably aliens.

01:18:53.000 Yeah.

01:18:54.000 Just equal both on both sides, like equal, they could do it w without a crazy example.

01:19:01.000 In professional pool, there's this kid named John Moore, uh elite like top of the food chain pro pool player.

01:19:07.000 Hurts his shoulder, can't play right-handed anymore.

01:19:10.000 Learns how to play left-handed, and becomes world-class left-handed.

01:19:15.000 Wow.

01:19:17.000 Learned as a professional when he hurt his arm that he had to start playing left-handed, started playing left-handed and started winning like world-class events as a lefty, beating world-class top of the food chain pool players who've been playing right-handed their whole life.

01:19:33.000 And he's been playing lefty for like two years.

01:19:35.000 Yeah.

01:19:35.000 It's nuts.

01:19:36.000 I can't write my name.

01:19:38.000 I broke my arm once and I had to write my name and I write everything with my left hand.

01:19:43.000 It was fucking terrible.

01:19:44.000 Yeah, no, it's like there's nothing there.

01:19:46.000 And I draw, so I was trying to learn how to draw with my left hand.

01:19:49.000 Yeah.

01:19:50.000 But I think it now in retrospect, it might have helped me draw better with my right hand.

01:19:54.000 I think if you could learn how to do something, that's why I think lefties are better at stuff.

01:19:59.000 What do you draw?

01:20:00.000 Well, I used to want to be a comic book illustrator when I was a kid.

01:20:03.000 So I drew a lot a lot of comic book stuff.

01:20:05.000 Oh shit.

01:20:05.000 Yeah.

01:20:06.000 You do that still?

01:20:07.000 No.

01:20:07.000 No, not anymore.

01:20:08.000 You don't miss it?

01:20:09.000 Uh I mean, I can do it, I can pick it up, but I would have to get into it really to like achieve the skill that I used to have, and then I would like I don't have any time.

01:20:16.000 Yeah.

01:20:17.000 It's fun.

01:20:17.000 I love drawing, but I don't have any time.

01:20:20.000 School always like blew my mind.

01:20:21.000 They'd just be sitting there drawing like comic book, like literal, like that good.

01:20:24.000 Oh yeah, yeah.

01:20:25.000 You self-taught, or are you just gonna Yeah, mostly self-taught?

01:20:28.000 See, that's also gotta be something that's e I mean, if you start from nothing and just like I don't know, I feel I feel like that's inside you somewhere as well, like to be a naturally gifted, just to know how to some people are just better at that than well, I had a very artistic family.

01:20:41.000 My uncle Sal and my uncle Vinny were both artists.

01:20:44.000 Okay.

01:20:44.000 So my mom's brothers, both brothers were artists.

01:20:48.000 What kind of artists?

01:20:49.000 One of them ran a pottery guild and uh I was an art teacher, and the other one did a bunch of different types of uh art, uh photography and uh did a lot of album covers.

01:21:00.000 Did album covers for Kiss.

01:21:01.000 Yeah, yeah, and he took me to work with him once and I got to meet Ace Freely when he had no makeup on.

01:21:07.000 Like before anybody knew what they really looked like.

01:21:12.000 No, no, they had makeup on back then, but no one knew what they looked like in real life.

01:21:16.000 Right.

01:21:16.000 So he showed up in the office with no makeup on.

01:21:19.000 I was like, this is crazy.

01:21:21.000 That's wild.

01:21:21.000 And I think I was probably like 10.

01:21:23.000 You know, and I was like, this is nuts.

01:21:26.000 I was just hanging out with my uncle in the office.

01:21:28.000 Yeah.

01:21:28.000 And fucking ace freely walked in.

01:21:30.000 That's that's wild.

01:21:31.000 My my third grade teacher, um, her brother was the drummer and twisted sister.

01:21:36.000 No.

01:21:36.000 Yeah, Tony Piero.

01:21:38.000 We're not good.

01:21:41.000 He was the first, like, I mean, like r rock star that cross dressed. 0.89

01:21:48.000 Like D. Snyder in them.

01:21:50.000 Right?

01:21:50.000 Yeah.

01:21:51.000 They were they were one of the big glam, yeah, like glam rock bands.

01:21:55.000 But it was almost cross dressing.

01:21:57.000 That's him on the on the right of D. Right.

01:22:00.000 Like you would kind of you would say Yeah, that's I mean, that's that's you would ask his pronouns.

01:22:05.000 You know what I'm saying?

01:22:06.000 That's like poison, all those groups back then.

01:22:09.000 But um so yeah, so she lived so we lived in these little garden apartments. 0.63

01:22:15.000 That's so ridiculous.

01:22:18.000 Bro, they were huge.

01:22:19.000 They were huge.

01:22:20.000 They were fucking huge.

01:22:21.000 Or is that natural?

01:22:24.000 Uh I don't know, maybe they added it.

01:22:26.000 I think it's like a Marilyn Man Roman.

01:22:27.000 Yeah.

01:22:28.000 Remember when the ladies were doing that? 1.00

01:22:29.000 They were adding a fake beauty mark. 0.98

01:22:30.000 Yeah.

01:22:30.000 Like, what are you doing, honey?

01:22:32.000 So this guy, so my teacher lived upstairs from us in the apartment building.

01:22:36.000 So he used to go be at her house all the time.

01:22:38.000 So I was in grammar school.

01:22:40.000 I was in, I was like, I I couldn't have been more than like eight.

01:22:43.000 Same or something like that.

01:22:45.000 And my dad was the superintendent of the par apartment buildings.

01:22:49.000 And so he knew everyone, and my teeth that was my teacher.

01:22:52.000 So we met him at a young age, and he used to come over to my house all the time.

01:22:56.000 So I have pictures of me at like my parents in my parents' kitchen, like just sitting down eight years old in my pajamas with him and just eating like a tuna sandwich, and he's like literally dressed like that.

01:23:05.000 He's in like I swear to God, dude.

01:23:08.000 I have one where he's in full electric blue spandex pants.

01:23:13.000 Oh my god.

01:23:13.000 And like a jean a ripped jean jacket with his hair all up, and I'm just it's just me and him sitting at the table.

01:23:17.000 I'm just gonna.

01:23:18.000 Oh my god.

01:23:20.000 Oh, dude, that's so ridiculous.

01:23:22.000 We used to I remember back then.

01:23:24.000 Did you ever have that like did you we were into like the it you have a uh the the denim jacket?

01:23:28.000 Oh, I had a denim jacket.

01:23:29.000 And then we got like the patches all over it.

01:23:31.000 Oh yeah.

01:23:32.000 And then when we graduated, like everyone sign, like take a sharpie a black marker on like sign your your jacket.

01:23:37.000 I don't think that exists anymore.

01:23:38.000 Oh no.

01:23:39.000 That kind of thing.

01:23:40.000 Yeah.

01:23:41.000 Denim jackets were a sign you were a rebel.

01:23:43.000 I have one.

01:23:44.000 Wearing a denoun denim jacket, especially if you had a pack of cigarettes in the denim jacket.

01:23:49.000 Yeah.

01:23:49.000 You know?

01:23:50.000 I remember there's this one kid.

01:23:51.000 You know, sometimes when you're like 14, you see some kid that like you never seen before, and you're like, wow, that guy's so cool.

01:23:57.000 There was this dude, he had a denim jacket on and a pack of cigarettes in his pocket, and he just had perfect hair, and he just looked cool, like this Italian-looking kid.

01:24:05.000 I'm like, that guy looks so cool.

01:24:07.000 I wish I was cool.

01:24:08.000 Yeah.

01:24:09.000 I can never be that cool.

01:24:10.000 He was like smoking cigarette on a fucking in the breeze way.

01:24:14.000 And I was like, that guy, like he's in a movie.

01:24:17.000 That guy's in a movie.

01:24:18.000 I was a dork.

01:24:19.000 I was trying to hide from people.

01:24:20.000 I was trying to do that.

01:24:21.000 That influenced me so much that I took my money that I made for confirmation, and I bought a Van Halen replica guitar.

01:24:28.000 I swear I bought it.

01:24:30.000 I did you learn how to play?

01:24:31.000 No, not a fucking cord.

01:24:32.000 I it was the red guitar with like the white lines on it.

01:24:36.000 It was like a famous Eddie Vent.

01:24:37.000 So it's as a kid's one though.

01:24:39.000 And I bought it at this place still there, mode music on base.

01:24:42.000 It's a I took all my money.

01:24:43.000 I bought that, I bought an amplifier, I bought a guitar case, and I I spent all my money on it, and I never used it, never took it out of the I I I like, you know, just never used it.

01:24:54.000 I have it to this day.

01:24:55.000 Wow.

01:24:56.000 Like well, you could learn as a part of your workout regimen.

01:24:58.000 Uh yeah, I can't.

01:24:59.000 Like a mental concentration workout.

01:25:01.000 Yeah.

01:25:02.000 Because it is kinda, right?

01:25:03.000 I used it one time.

01:25:04.000 It came to it came full circle on on the show.

01:25:08.000 Um Do you know the band Imagine Dragons?

01:25:10.000 Yes.

01:25:11.000 Okay, so we I met uh met them along the way, friendly with them.

01:25:16.000 So before they well, they was big because this was Jones Beach, which is like 15,000 people, they sold that out.

01:25:21.000 Whoa.

01:25:21.000 They were playing Jones Beach.

01:25:22.000 It was like maybe ten again ten years ago.

01:25:25.000 And we made me, they threw me out on stage before they came out as one of the opening acts.

01:25:33.000 And I had to sing and play guitar to f almost almost 15,000 people.

01:25:38.000 And I don't sing or play guitar, and they didn't tell me what songs.

01:25:41.000 I had to make it up on the spot.

01:25:42.000 Oh no.

01:25:43.000 Me and my buddy Joe, who they put him as the drummer, they introduced us as a band called Senora Lanza, which was the name of our high school Spanish teacher.

01:25:54.000 And so my God.

01:25:55.000 There was three opening acts before us, which is bonkers, right?

01:26:00.000 And so when they were about to come on, they they made it like they were gonna come on.

01:26:04.000 They lowered the lights and all those freaking spotlights started going all over the place, and the place went nuts, and then they introduced the fourth opening act, and us two walked out.

01:26:12.000 He got with the in uh he got behind the drums, and I used that guitar that I bought in 1989, June 89.

01:26:19.000 I I finally used it in like 2015, and they just they're like, All right, go, you're an opening act, and that's all they said.

01:26:26.000 Oh my god.

01:26:27.000 And I just started like just hitting the guitar and and just making up songs and stuff, and we were getting booed, shit.

01:26:35.000 People were throwing things at us.

01:26:38.000 I didn't even hear it.

01:26:40.000 It's probably like copyrighted.

01:26:43.000 No, no, I made it up.

01:26:44.000 Oh, oh, you mean because of the show?

01:26:45.000 No, I doubt that.

01:26:46.000 Let's let's play some of it.

01:26:51.000 Can I see it, James?

01:26:52.000 I put in your pants pocket a dedication for the set.

01:26:55.000 Open it up and read it.

01:26:57.000 Oh, you had to dedicate the set.

01:27:00.000 Yeah, the dedication was terrible because I'm gonna play look, mommy, I'm a rock star.

01:27:06.000 Oh boy.

01:27:07.000 This is one of our favorites.

01:27:15.000 He doesn't have to go nothing.

01:27:29.000 Look, mommy, I'm gonna ask you something.

01:27:37.000 How badly does he suck out?

01:27:39.000 It's probably his worse than I imagine.

01:27:44.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:27:45.000 Look, mommy. 0.84

01:27:47.000 They made me sing five songs.

01:27:50.000 Oh my god.

01:27:51.000 Shut your face, Grandma. 1.00

01:27:52.000 Oh my god.

01:27:54.000 Um my god.

01:27:55.000 Yeah, so they also they made me call them the imagination dragons right in the beginning.

01:28:01.000 And I dedicated I said, Everyone just calm down, the imagination dragons will be out in a little in a little while.

01:28:10.000 And then the dedication was like this.

01:28:12.000 It was in Long Island.

01:28:14.000 I was like, it was like this this uh this set is dedicated to the people of Pittsburgh because I could already tell that you guys are not gonna be half as good an audience as them.

01:28:23.000 And then I started playing, they were booing us and everything.

01:28:26.000 Oh my god.

01:28:26.000 And then at one point, a guy came to like a guy came on stage and he tried to grab my guitar from me, and I just I didn't know what was going on.

01:28:35.000 I mean, I was like a deer in the headlights out there.

01:28:36.000 It was like 14 times, and I just pushed him away, and he's like trying to grab my guitar, and I'm pushing him away, and I'm singing through it, right?

01:28:43.000 I'm cursing also because I'm just like free for free wheeling it up there, and I didn't know they're like they're Mormons, they don't really curse.

01:28:48.000 And so like they were like, I I didn't get the memo, I wasn't supposed to curse.

01:28:51.000 Oh no, and so I'm dropping F-bombs. 0.67

01:28:53.000 I I I I sang a song called Fuck the Imagination Dragons.

01:28:57.000 I'm better than them.

01:28:58.000 Fucking how long did you sing for?

01:28:59.000 I would say I would say like probably somewhere like eight, seven, eight minutes, something like that.

01:29:06.000 And then I'm getting bit with ice, everything's so long.

01:29:14.000 And then uh, and then this guy he he keeps trying to get the the guitar from me.

01:29:17.000 I'm ripping it from him, and I'm like, fuck the magic.

01:29:19.000 And he's trying to, and I I wouldn't let him have it.

01:29:22.000 And I didn't realize that was the official union stage manager trying to get me off the stage because there's a curfew that they have to hit and they have to do their full show, and they had to do their finale.

01:29:34.000 And as soon as they go, you know, this past curfew on a union stage, the entire thing is like double time for every single worker there.

01:29:42.000 And then this penalties, it's hundreds, it could be like a hundred thousand dollars or yes, and so no one tells me who this guy is, so I'm shoving the real union stage manager off of me because I thought he was trying to just sabotage me.

01:29:56.000 Right.

01:29:56.000 And I thought I had to stay out there, so I push him away, I push him away.

01:30:00.000 The guy's like, give me the goddamn guitar.

01:30:02.000 I'm like, I'm not taking, you know.

01:30:03.000 And I found out afterwards that that was like official and I was supposed to get off, and I didn't.

01:30:09.000 I caused them later because they couldn't not do their encore.

01:30:12.000 Their encore went into overtime.

01:30:14.000 And the encore, that dude, he gets hooked up to his cables.

01:30:17.000 They lift him into the air and they spin him in circles while he plays drums.

01:30:22.000 It's wild.

01:30:23.000 And they said they they went into they went into the bonus and they had to pay all these fees because of because of me.

01:30:28.000 Oh no.

01:30:28.000 Did you guys reimburse them?

01:30:30.000 No, I don't have money to reimburse them.

01:30:31.000 Like I just I I I know.

01:30:33.000 I to they're still our friends, but like and at the end they're like stage dive off.

01:30:40.000 And I'm looking in the crowd, and I'm like, I'm gonna I'm gonna kill myself.

01:30:45.000 These people aren't gonna catch me.

01:30:46.000 Like they hate me.

01:30:47.000 Right.

01:30:47.000 And they staged, I stageized, so I just ran and I jumped off, but I kind of just like landed on the floor and rolled, like no one caught me.

01:30:57.000 It was, yeah, it was it was rough.

01:30:59.000 It was rough.

01:30:59.000 Shh.

01:31:00.000 But that's the guitar.

01:31:01.000 That's how cool I thought that he wasn't twisted sister.

01:31:04.000 Like, that's how cool I was like, look at this guy.

01:31:06.000 Which one of your friends told you to stage dive?

01:31:08.000 Fuck him.

01:31:09.000 Uh whoever was, I don't know.

01:31:10.000 That is so irresponsible.

01:31:12.000 I know.

01:31:12.000 Well, they weren't, they were never gonna catch me.

01:31:14.000 And I guess they saw me, and I just I kind of jumped off.

01:31:17.000 I think as I as I'm in the air jumping off, I think I hit with a soda.

01:31:21.000 It's like it was bad.

01:31:24.000 Oh my god, that's so ridiculous.

01:31:26.000 I know that's so ridiculous.

01:31:28.000 Yeah, the show's crazy.

01:31:29.000 The show has given me like a lot of opportunities to do stuff like that.

01:31:32.000 I would never have done like that.

01:31:33.000 Well, who the fuck ever gets to do something like that?

01:31:35.000 Yeah.

01:31:36.000 The balls to stand up there where all those people hate you and go through with whatever they're telling you to say.

01:31:41.000 I had a ping of anxiety.

01:31:43.000 Did anybody let them know afterwards that it was for I I don't recall.

01:31:48.000 I don't recall.

01:31:49.000 I I I would imagine maybe they came out and said something, but I don't I don't remember.

01:31:53.000 It was like 10 years ago.

01:31:54.000 That's funny.

01:31:55.000 There was another time they put us in uh the devils uh during uh in between periods, they threw me as a goalie in the in the net of the New Jersey Devils, and all the devils came out and took slap shots on me.

01:32:07.000 Me and my buddy Q. It was two of us in net, and it was scarier than that.

01:32:12.000 Like they were taking blistering slap shots at us.

01:32:16.000 I was in full devil's gear as a goalie, and I I remember there was uh someone from like Sports Illustrated or something was there, and I have this.

01:32:24.000 I saved it like a chain of his tweets that he was tweeting, and he's like, I don't know what's going on here, but the devils are apparently taking slap shots at a civilian.

01:32:32.000 He's down on the ground, he's very hurt.

01:32:34.000 This is not a good promotion.

01:32:36.000 He's like, I don't think that the devil should be doing this type of promotion with fans.

01:32:39.000 He didn't know it was our show.

01:32:41.000 Oh wow.

01:32:41.000 And he's like, he's like Did you get hurt?

01:32:44.000 No, not not like hurt hurt, it hurt, but I didn't get hurt.

01:32:48.000 Okay.

01:32:49.000 So boom, when you were down, he didn't need to be concerned.

01:32:52.000 I got back up, but like it was like it still was hitting me like in the neck and the thing.

01:32:56.000 Oh yeah, like you had the guard on and stuff.

01:32:58.000 But the guard protect your neck.

01:32:59.000 It it hurt bad, you know.

01:33:01.000 It hurt.

01:33:01.000 Where is it covered?

01:33:02.000 Does it cover your neck?

01:33:03.000 Yeah, everything was covered, but it's still like fuck still taking a puck like a 90 miles an hour to the chest and stuff.

01:33:08.000 Pucks are so hard, too.

01:33:10.000 Yeah, and I I played hockey in the like late grammar school and high school.

01:33:14.000 I played hockey, and I and I started as a goal, roller hockey goalie, but it it doesn't you can't compare the two things.

01:33:21.000 Oh, you ever see some old school photos of the old school goalies with the scars all over their face?

01:33:26.000 Dude, no, they didn't even wear fucking helmets back then.

01:33:28.000 Yeah, it's crazy.

01:33:29.000 They just played without helmets.

01:33:31.000 A puck hit you in the mug on Tuesday.

01:33:34.000 You're done.

01:33:35.000 Yeah, and you gotta play again next week.

01:33:38.000 My first ever uh my first ever tryout for ice hockey in high school was I we it it was hard to play hockey back then.

01:33:46.000 Like there wasn't a lot of like it was expensive and there wasn't a lot of rinks.

01:33:48.000 We drove like two hours up to like uh like Bear Mountain or some crap, like three hours with my family, my dad, my stepmom, and they had to wait in the stands because they can't drop you off and go home because it's you just drove three hours.

01:33:59.000 So they're watching these tryouts, and I was my first time I ever put ice skates on in my life.

01:34:04.000 I had played roller hockey already, but I never put on ice skates in my life, so it's kind of like you were saying, like just trying to play like left-handed or whatever.

01:34:12.000 I was like, oh, maybe it'll transfer, you know.

01:34:15.000 And I put on these ice skates and it didn't.

01:34:17.000 I was really bad.

01:34:18.000 But um someone took a slap shot and it got deflected into the uh onto the stands.

01:34:26.000 So whatever, I didn't think anything of that.

01:34:28.000 At the end of the tryouts, I went back, got my club, got my bag, walked back out, and my my stepmom was out there with uh her eye was this big, the ambulance was there, she uh bleeding black and blue, stitches, everything.

01:34:40.000 The puck hit her right in the face. 0.97

01:34:42.000 Oh my during my tryouts.

01:34:45.000 Oh my god, dude.

01:34:46.000 Right in the face.

01:34:47.000 Oh I was like, oh my god.

01:34:50.000 Like it was her face was this big, blood everywhere, she was already black and blue, a gash right here.

01:34:57.000 Does that happen all the time?

01:35:00.000 To her?

01:35:01.000 No, no.

01:35:03.000 The people in the crowd get hit.

01:35:04.000 I got that.

01:35:04.000 Yeah, they had to put up nets because a couple of people died.

01:35:07.000 Jesus.

01:35:08.000 Yeah.

01:35:09.000 And this is a high school kid.

01:35:10.000 Oh my god.

01:35:11.000 That was a high school deflection.

01:35:12.000 Like imagine like the devil's taking slap shots at you.

01:35:15.000 Yeah.

01:35:17.000 Bro, that's crazy.

01:35:18.000 Yeah.

01:35:19.000 Those guys taking slap shots at you.

01:35:23.000 Could you even react to it?

01:35:25.000 Like when did you see it coming?

01:35:27.000 It like do you could you see the puck?

01:35:29.000 It was like um a split-second battle between whether I would like try to like actually block it, or just like wince and take it.

01:35:38.000 Because it was like it was faster than you know, I was prepared for, obviously.

01:35:43.000 Like it can you skate not these days, you know.

01:35:50.000 I just saw something interesting.

01:35:52.000 That picture that we've always seen.

01:35:53.000 Let me find it like this.

01:35:56.000 Yeah.

01:35:57.000 It's not real.

01:35:58.000 Right.

01:36:00.000 It's a recreation of all the times he's had stitches in his life.

01:36:03.000 Oh.

01:36:04.000 This says it's what?

01:36:05.000 But the scars in his face are real.

01:36:07.000 What it would look like if uh the other one is 16 years of professional hockey.

01:36:12.000 The problem is like the one on the left, you can't really see very good.

01:36:16.000 It's he's very shadowy.

01:36:17.000 But you could tell he's got scars everywhere.

01:36:20.000 You know, those guys just took it in the face all the time.

01:36:25.000 This says that the first guy wore a mask in 1929.

01:36:28.000 This guy.

01:36:29.000 When do they figure it out?

01:36:30.000 Yeah, look at him.

01:36:31.000 He's already his nose is already busted.

01:36:33.000 He's like, all right, I'm putting a fucking mask on.

01:36:35.000 That guy's probably a genius.

01:36:37.000 He he had the mask.

01:36:39.000 And before he got his nose busted, like really well, like he got his nose is actively busted, right?

01:36:45.000 Maybe the mask on afterwards.

01:36:47.000 That's what I'm saying.

01:36:48.000 He's like, let me put this thing on.

01:36:49.000 Or maybe he broke his nose with the mask on.

01:36:51.000 I mean, if you take a full one to the nose, it's not like it's not a smash against your nose.

01:36:56.000 It's gonna smash.

01:36:57.000 Or was it?

01:36:58.000 One of them had it had the blood going through there right there.

01:37:01.000 The blood was going through the nose.

01:37:03.000 Oh god.

01:37:03.000 I guess it's just the hole.

01:37:06.000 Yeah, but dude.

01:37:07.000 Yeah, they just built different.

01:37:10.000 That is a hard man sport.

01:37:11.000 And it's the only sport where you're allowed to fight.

01:37:15.000 To this day.

01:37:16.000 Crazy.

01:37:16.000 Just let them have it.

01:37:18.000 It's the weirdest thing.

01:37:20.000 She just grandfathered in.

01:37:21.000 Yeah.

01:37:21.000 All and all the like extra precautions now and the CTE stuff and all that stuff.

01:37:25.000 And they out the window.

01:37:26.000 It just hasn't even permeated.

01:37:28.000 Yeah.

01:37:28.000 Like they haven't had a meeting, not a vote.

01:37:30.000 It's just like, no, the guys need to fight.

01:37:32.000 It's crazy.

01:37:33.000 It's part of the sport.

01:37:34.000 Do you feel like it's less fighting now or no?

01:37:36.000 I don't know.

01:37:36.000 I don't watch hockey.

01:37:37.000 I haven't watched in a minute, yeah.

01:37:39.000 Um, you know, I grew up in Boston.

01:37:41.000 If you said you had to be like, say it in whispered tones.

01:37:43.000 Oh no, I don't watch hockey.

01:37:44.000 People get mad at you.

01:37:46.000 There's a big Bruins town.

01:37:47.000 Everybody loved hockey.

01:37:48.000 But for me, I was like, I don't like being cold.

01:37:50.000 So uh I don't I don't like skating.

01:37:52.000 I don't have time for this.

01:37:53.000 Yeah.

01:37:54.000 It's a lot.

01:37:54.000 It's evolved.

01:37:55.000 You need something to watch.

01:37:58.000 It's a really fun sport to watch.

01:37:59.000 It's fast as fuck.

01:38:00.000 It's you gotta be in really good shape to play hockey.

01:38:02.000 Because those guys are just moving, move and move, move and move and move.

01:38:05.000 And it's like this delicate balancing act you're doing on metal skin.

01:38:10.000 Graceful too.

01:38:10.000 Yeah.

01:38:11.000 As much as it's as it's just you know, bru brute brutal.

01:38:15.000 Sure.

01:38:15.000 Like when you watch a guy like Bobby Orr in his prime, the way he was able to maneuver through people, the the movement, it's crazy.

01:38:21.000 Yeah.

01:38:22.000 It's beautiful swans.

01:38:23.000 Yeah, it's like a dance.

01:38:24.000 It's a dance and a sport at the same time.

01:38:27.000 Really amazing sport when you think about it that way.

01:38:29.000 And then the speed of it too.

01:38:31.000 It's a fast fucking sport, man.

01:38:32.000 Like you cannot be out of shape and play that sport.

01:38:35.000 That was the only time I was in shape in my life, probably.

01:38:38.000 It's fitness man.

01:38:39.000 You're you're constantly kind of sprinting with skates, you know.

01:38:43.000 You move shh so much core movement.

01:38:46.000 And when I did that, I skated everywhere.

01:38:48.000 Like I was roll I played roller hockey verse, but when I was it when I was like in my like four or five years that I was like obsessed with it, I played every day.

01:38:55.000 I roller skated everywhere.

01:38:57.000 Oh wow.

01:38:57.000 So you were with that guy out there roller skating on the streets.

01:39:00.000 Yeah.

01:39:01.000 Like a wow man.

01:39:02.000 Yeah.

01:39:02.000 Well, that's smart.

01:39:03.000 That's a great way to keep up those skills.

01:39:05.000 Like you're gonna have to walk anyway.

01:39:07.000 You already know how well you can skate.

01:39:08.000 Why not just skate there?

01:39:09.000 Yeah, it was kind of like skateboarding.

01:39:11.000 Like, why wouldn't I get there like t five times faster or whatever?

01:39:13.000 Did dudes try to knock you over ever.

01:39:16.000 When I played hockey?

01:39:17.000 No.

01:39:18.000 When you're skating by them.

01:39:20.000 You know?

01:39:22.000 You see a guy with roller skates on.

01:39:24.000 You're kind of kind of tempted to go fuck this guy.

01:39:27.000 I mean, I wasn't I I wasn't like it wasn't like roller skating like on Venice Beach, like with like my headphones and like you know.

01:39:34.000 I didn't look like you know a cornball.

01:39:36.000 I just you know some people they don't like people in roller skates.

01:39:39.000 Like some when I lived in California, uh motorcycles were allowed to split the lanes, you know.

01:39:44.000 Oh, really?

01:39:45.000 Yeah.

01:39:45.000 Yeah, which is crazy.

01:39:46.000 It's really dangerous.

01:39:48.000 But if you have a motorcycle, you can get by in traffic when everybody else is fucked, you're zipping right through.

01:39:53.000 And I remember one time I watched this guy see this dude coming up beside us, and I moved to the left to give this guy a little room so he could pass, and the dude in front of me moved into the lane on purpose to stop this guy from passing him for no reason at all.

01:40:12.000 And that's gonna happen with that too.

01:40:14.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:40:14.000 No, I don't I don't recall really.

01:40:16.000 It was good for my curfew, because I used to go to my my girlfriend's house, my dad was like, You have to be home by like 11.

01:40:22.000 And it was like probably like a couple of miles.

01:40:25.000 And so like that's a long time to be not running into any bullies.

01:40:29.000 Yeah, that's all that's okay.

01:40:31.000 Guys out there that would just make that decision, you know, fuck him, fucking knock him off.

01:40:37.000 I just used a lace them up and uh there was actually a huge hill, like half halfway there.

01:40:44.000 Like I got up to the top.

01:40:45.000 Yeah, I mean flying.

01:40:47.000 So I just stand.

01:40:48.000 And I'd be going like yeah, I'd probably be going like 30, 30 30 miles an hour.

01:40:53.000 That's it.

01:40:54.000 If I wiped out, it would have been bad.

01:40:55.000 But if someone pulled out, right?

01:40:57.000 Was there any cars that could have possibly it was a service road of a highway and it was late at night, so I wouldn't do it if there was cars.

01:41:03.000 You're doing it late at night on a service road or the highway.

01:41:06.000 You know how crazy that sounds.

01:41:08.000 Yeah, but uh but it wasn't that crazy.

01:41:10.000 It wasn't that crazy.

01:41:10.000 But I would get home in five minutes, whereas it normally would have taken me like fifteen minutes or getting a nice little workout.

01:41:15.000 Yeah.

01:41:16.000 I gave all that up.

01:41:17.000 Yeah.

01:41:18.000 I remember I when I got out like into the workforce, I was out of college, one of my buddies was like, You want to go shoot the puck around today?

01:41:23.000 I'm like, I haven't done it in like five or six years.

01:41:25.000 He's like, Let's go.

01:41:26.000 And we went and we went to like a little uh roller rink, that like a hockey rink there, and we we skated around for about I s must have been twenty minutes.

01:41:34.000 You know that burn that you get in your throat, like the tricky ass office when you haven't like maybe you don't because you haven't like you're you're consistently working out, but like when you're not in shape and then you try to play a sports thing and it just feels like your insides are on fire.

01:41:48.000 Have you felt that?

01:41:49.000 Not like that.

01:41:50.000 I know I've done I know what you're saying, though.

01:41:51.000 Like almost can't breathe.

01:41:56.000 So this is like you'd no cardio at all, no nothing.

01:41:58.000 Oh man, I feel like I have a heart attack.

01:42:00.000 You're doing that.

01:42:01.000 Out of like if just like maybe like five years removed.

01:42:04.000 Wow.

01:42:04.000 Yeah.

01:42:05.000 Yeah, just five years of not working out at all, and then you try to skate, I would imagine.

01:42:09.000 Yeah, your body.

01:42:10.000 Unfortunately, your body will just fall into a state of disrepair.

01:42:15.000 Yeah.

01:42:17.000 Leave it alone.

01:42:18.000 It's like if you have a house, if you own a home, one of the things you find out as soon as you get your first home is ship breaks all the time.

01:42:24.000 There was always some fucking pipe that breaks, there's this that goes out, there's that that fucks up, the AC's broken.

01:42:31.000 There's always something.

01:42:32.000 You're always that's the same shit with your body.

01:42:35.000 It's the same shit.

01:42:36.000 And if you put it into a state of disrepair and you don't fix the AC, you don't fucking my pipes are bad.

01:42:42.000 The pipes are bad, you don't deal with it, you just let your house flood.

01:42:45.000 Like that's the problem.

01:42:47.000 The problem is we most of us, you know, are like bad landlords.

01:42:51.000 Yeah.

01:42:51.000 That's me, man.

01:42:52.000 We're like slum lords.

01:42:54.000 We're slumlords for our body.

01:42:56.000 Yeah.

01:42:57.000 I'm trying to change it.

01:42:58.000 No, you are changing it.

01:42:59.000 Don't say trying.

01:43:00.000 Yeah.

01:43:00.000 Trying makes it seem like you might quit.

01:43:01.000 You're not gonna quit.

01:43:02.000 That's right.

01:43:03.000 There you go.

01:43:03.000 He told me when I cause I'm gonna be here and I'm away from home the next week.

01:43:07.000 He's like, you gotta go at least three times and send me pictures of yourself.

01:43:11.000 We could work out here.

01:43:12.000 Yeah.

01:43:12.000 I got a gym right here.

01:43:13.000 Yeah.

01:43:13.000 Yeah, we're we can wear it after the show.

01:43:15.000 I wouldn't want to bring you down, bro.

01:43:16.000 No, we just have a little workout.

01:43:18.000 Just a little something.

01:43:18.000 Yeah.

01:43:19.000 Yeah.

01:43:19.000 If you want to keep doing it, yeah.

01:43:21.000 If you want to keep it up while you're here, the the main thing about working out is momentum.

01:43:25.000 It's number one more than anything else is momentum.

01:43:27.000 And if you lose your momentum, then it's hard.

01:43:30.000 Hard to get going.

01:43:31.000 But once you get going, you get a couple of workouts in a row, you're like, ooh, uh, this is it.

01:43:35.000 I do it.

01:43:36.000 This is what I do.

01:43:37.000 Fuck yeah, we're doing it again.

01:43:38.000 Just don't kill yourself.

01:43:40.000 Don't get yourself to when you wake up, you're like, oh fuck.

01:43:43.000 Yes.

01:43:44.000 Ooh, and you're so sore, and you you're gonna go to the gym right now.

01:43:48.000 That's kind of stupid.

01:43:49.000 Yeah, you really shouldn't.

01:43:50.000 You shouldn't never don't you're not a pro athlete.

01:43:52.000 Don't get yourself to that spot.

01:43:54.000 But as long as you just keep doing it, that's the key.

01:43:56.000 It's just I think that's with almost everything in life.

01:44:00.000 That's what alcoholics say.

01:44:01.000 It's you know, one day uh at a time.

01:44:04.000 They just next day, next day, get some momentum.

01:44:06.000 Now I'm not drinking for two years.

01:44:08.000 Now I'm not drinking for five years.

01:44:10.000 I got all these coins and shit.

01:44:11.000 Yeah.

01:44:11.000 It's the same thing.

01:44:12.000 It's just like we we have to just make healthy patterns.

01:44:16.000 And you can do it.

01:44:17.000 You're doing it right now.

01:44:18.000 The next time I come back, I'll be like a pose off next time.

01:44:26.000 I'm not I'm just I'm just looking to live longer.

01:44:28.000 You know what looks good?

01:44:29.000 Shane.

01:44:29.000 See how big he got?

01:44:30.000 No.

01:44:31.000 Shane's been working out here.

01:44:32.000 Yeah.

01:44:32.000 Yeah, Shane has been working out like super regular.

01:44:35.000 He got really into working out.

01:44:36.000 We started doing these comedians workouts here, and then uh Shane Park thing.

01:44:41.000 Yeah, Shane got my friend Sean to start training him.

01:44:43.000 And Sean took a party.

01:44:45.000 Yeah, and so I haven't no, I haven't I talked to Shane yesterday, but I haven't seen him.

01:44:48.000 I I actually you know what's so funny?

01:44:50.000 The last picture I saw of him, like, or not the last picture, but recently I saw he was filming this that John Madden movie.

01:44:57.000 Oh, yeah, and that paparazzi took that photo of him in character with the mustache coming out of his track.

01:45:02.000 I haven't seen that.

01:45:04.000 He was an unflattering shot.

01:45:05.000 Like he's he's talked about it.

01:45:06.000 And that's so that's the last thing I like really saw on his you could probably pull that you could probably it's pretty freaking funny.

01:45:13.000 You could see he locks eyes with the photographer just as he's coming out, and it's like he's already meant to look, I think frumpy from the character.

01:45:22.000 That's hilarious.

01:45:24.000 That's hilarious.

01:45:25.000 That's awesome.

01:45:26.000 That he's gonna be John Madden.

01:45:29.000 He'd be perfect.

01:45:29.000 Well, he first I don't think he's mad.

01:45:31.000 Is he Madden?

01:45:31.000 No, I don't think he's Madden.

01:45:32.000 Who is he supposed to be?

01:45:33.000 He's just someone in the Madden universe.

01:45:35.000 Oh, Nick Cage is John Madden.

01:45:38.000 Whoa, which I can't see at all.

01:45:41.000 Oh, really?

01:45:42.000 Oh, whoa, dude, is there a photo of Nicholas Cage as John Madden?

01:45:45.000 I want to see that.

01:45:46.000 Oh, that's young John Madden.

01:45:48.000 Well, that that's Nicholas Cage.

01:45:49.000 Yeah, yeah, that's oh, the hair does look like Madden's hair.

01:45:52.000 Yeah, but they did something to his face.

01:45:54.000 No, they did a little something to his face.

01:45:57.000 They did a little something.

01:45:59.000 Wait, wait, didn't they?

01:46:00.000 Wait, no, how funny is it though that he looked in shame and said that he was John Madden.

01:46:05.000 I thought he was John Maddox.

01:46:09.000 I thought he was John Madden!

01:46:11.000 He could pass for him.

01:46:12.000 He could pass.

01:46:13.000 Guess what?

01:46:13.000 When I when I first clicked on it, I was like, Shane's John.

01:46:15.000 I said this, I said this.

01:46:16.000 That's hilarious.

01:46:17.000 Oh, there it is.

01:46:18.000 Oh, yeah, they definitely did some stuff to him.

01:46:20.000 They did some stuff to him.

01:46:22.000 Yeah, he's got like a face thing on.

01:46:24.000 Wow, that's crazy.

01:46:24.000 He looks like a man.

01:46:26.000 Like even the body, they got the body right.

01:46:28.000 Yeah.

01:46:28.000 That's nuts.

01:46:29.000 Christian Bale.

01:46:30.000 Whoa, is that Christian Bale?

01:46:32.000 That's Christian Bale?

01:46:33.000 Yeah.

01:46:33.000 That's nuts.

01:46:34.000 That guy's a fucking chameleon.

01:46:36.000 Wow.

01:46:37.000 Yeah, that'll be sick.

01:46:39.000 Wow.

01:46:40.000 Biopics, man. 1.00

01:46:45.000 Oh wow.

01:46:47.000 That's cool.

01:46:48.000 Um, what were we just talking about?

01:46:50.000 We're talking about guys getting oh the Shane got big.

01:46:54.000 Got stout.

01:46:55.000 I've he must be putting in work then.

01:46:57.000 Because I'm I'm also like only doing it three days a week.

01:46:59.000 So because I just started and I don't want to like, you know I don't know if he's been on it recently because he just did he's about to do tires again.

01:47:06.000 He's like, you know, the boy's busy.

01:47:08.000 I know.

01:47:08.000 Fell's busy.

01:47:09.000 I know every time I'm gonna go.

01:47:11.000 I know.

01:47:12.000 I love it.

01:47:12.000 Love to see it.

01:47:13.000 He's the man.

01:47:14.000 I uh you know what I got shit for after the last time I was on?

01:47:18.000 What?

01:47:19.000 I uh I so many people came up to me after the last time I was like, dude, I I saw you know the Rogan episode and you didn't finish a story.

01:47:27.000 And I'm I'm the amount of people that said this to me.

01:47:29.000 I must have been like, yeah.

01:47:32.000 I I started to tell you a story about an experience I had, I think, with a ghost because I never I didn't believe in ghosts.

01:47:40.000 And I start I guess I started to tell and didn't finish it.

01:47:42.000 Can I tell you the amount of people that can't think it's like what the fuck, man?

01:47:45.000 You can't start well you can't just start it from the end though.

01:47:48.000 I know you're gonna have to start anyway, so tell the beginning of the story.

01:47:52.000 Retell the beginning of the story, because otherwise people are gonna go, what the fuck is he talking about?

01:47:56.000 Then they'll have to go back and listen to the whole podcast.

01:47:58.000 So many people though that I finally I was like, I probably I swear to God, if I go back on, I will bring it up and I'll try to retell the guy.

01:48:04.000 Let's retell the story.

01:48:05.000 I but I I just I'm doing this for them.

01:48:07.000 I just I don't know if how great the story is.

01:48:10.000 I so we would talk, I was saying how I just I don't believe in them, but I had this experience, I don't know what to make of it.

01:48:16.000 Okay.

01:48:16.000 Okay, so I was I lived alone at the time, and I I um when I go to sleep at night, I lock my I lock my uh my bedroom door.

01:48:24.000 It's just something I do.

01:48:25.000 So I locked my door, and uh I was laying in bed and I had the television on, and a lot of times I'll put the TV on mute, but keep the TV on when I fall asleep.

01:48:34.000 Something I do.

01:48:35.000 So I was telling you how because I sleep with a CPAP machine, how I would wrap myself up in a cocoon because I had an air source.

01:48:42.000 So I I like it's like a sarcophagus.

01:48:44.000 I like put everything over my head.

01:48:46.000 And I tuck in my feet, my and I put my like I swear you just see a tube coming out.

01:48:52.000 Oh it's it's amazing.

01:48:55.000 It's like the sensory deprivation things, right?

01:48:57.000 Right, okay.

01:48:57.000 That's what it's like.

01:48:58.000 Okay.

01:48:58.000 So I got used to that.

01:48:59.000 So anyway, I had just I was wide awake.

01:49:03.000 I just muted my television, and I wrapped myself up like a fucking burrito, and I had the C Pap on.

01:49:10.000 I'm laying there, and I always stick like one foot or one hand out.

01:49:13.000 It's just a nice cool breeze.

01:49:15.000 It's like a fun little thing to do when you're wrapped up like that.

01:49:17.000 Right.

01:49:18.000 And I had my hand out.

01:49:20.000 So this was out.

01:49:21.000 And I'm just laying there, and I thought I heard something or somebody.

01:49:25.000 I don't know if it was talking or I heard what I thought was like the door open, I suppose.

01:49:31.000 Like again, wasn't asleep.

01:49:34.000 That I wasn't asleep.

01:49:35.000 I was just I was just about to fall asleep.

01:49:39.000 I wouldn't even like I just laying.

01:49:41.000 Sure.

01:49:42.000 Sure, yeah, yeah.

01:49:42.000 But I didn't sleep and wake up or nothing like that.

01:49:45.000 And I wasn't, it wasn't, I wasn't laying in there 20 minutes.

01:49:48.000 Right.

01:49:49.000 It wasn't like that.

01:49:50.000 And I I'm laying there and I heard walking or the door or something.

01:49:57.000 And so I listened more intently.

01:49:59.000 And I I didn't hear anything again, and then all of a sudden I felt I don't know if it's a hand, whatever you want to call it, pressure.

01:50:10.000 Squeeze, oh, right here on my hand.

01:50:13.000 Right?

01:50:13.000 I just I just felt my hand get squeezed.

01:50:16.000 And I what's going on in my mind is I thought there was an intruder in the house initially, right?

01:50:24.000 So like an intruder came in the house, and I know I'm feeling this.

01:50:27.000 I'm like, I'm this all happened in seconds, but I'm thinking, okay, I heard something, now this pressure on my hand, and it went tighter and tighter.

01:50:34.000 And I'm like, someone is squeezing my hand right now.

01:50:38.000 I have to act like I'm not feeling this because I don't know what's about to happen.

01:50:43.000 But then I started in the same vein, I'm like, if this was a home intruder, why would they do this?

01:50:48.000 It doesn't make any sense to me.

01:50:49.000 Like, so aren't they gonna wake me up?

01:50:50.000 Like, wouldn't they try to get in and out?

01:50:52.000 I'm thinking of this in a split second.

01:50:54.000 And the pressure is such that it actually begins to hurt, not hurt, like I'll get off, but like, oh, that's squeezing.

01:51:01.000 Right.

01:51:01.000 You know what I mean?

01:51:02.000 And I'm like, all right, I am going to have to jump up and fight right now or something.

01:51:08.000 Something's happening here.

01:51:09.000 And I said, Are you awake?

01:51:10.000 Are you awake?

01:51:11.000 And I'm I'm like, I'm I'm I'm literally I'm awake.

01:51:13.000 I'm awake right now.

01:51:14.000 I'm laying here, I'm looking, I'm feeling my hand.

01:51:16.000 I am fully awake.

01:51:18.000 And I was like, I feel like I either have to count to three, jump up and get ready to fight, or I could I'm vulnerable and I don't know what's gonna happen to me.

01:51:27.000 I might just take charge of the situation, whatever I can.

01:51:30.000 Right.

01:51:30.000 And I just took a breath and I was like, all right, here I go.

01:51:34.000 And I and I uh did they let go?

01:51:36.000 They let go.

01:51:37.000 I felt the pressure release off my hand.

01:51:39.000 And so that's when I was like laying there with it limp, and I was like, I'm gonna jump up right now, and I'll just whatever happens, happens.

01:51:45.000 And it was like nerve-wracking.

01:51:47.000 And I just jumped up in my bed, up so I was standing on the bed.

01:51:52.000 I like threw the things off, and I just like was ready to write, and there was nothing there on my door.

01:51:57.000 How long was something squeezing your hand for?

01:52:00.000 Um I'll say less than 10 seconds.

01:52:04.000 That's a long time.

01:52:05.000 Yeah, maybe Yeah, maybe like 10 seconds.

01:52:09.000 Because it was first it was on me, and then it was more pressure, and then more pressure, and then let go.

01:52:15.000 And then when I jumped up, no one in my room, door locked.

01:52:20.000 And so, and I was like, I'm up.

01:52:22.000 I was up.

01:52:22.000 I was just up.

01:52:23.000 I'm not like sleeping.

01:52:24.000 And it freaked me out.

01:52:26.000 I turned every light on, opened my door, walked around the house.

01:52:28.000 I almost like I was like, Do I leave?

01:52:30.000 Like maybe the aliens thought you were trying to kill yourself.

01:52:34.000 What?

01:52:34.000 Maybe the aliens.

01:52:36.000 Maybe maybe that's what it was.

01:52:37.000 Maybe it was an alien came down like, hey buddy, you wouldn't have to be a little bit more.

01:52:40.000 Because I was wrapped up.

01:52:41.000 Because I was wrapped up.

01:52:42.000 You're wrapped up with a tube coming out.

01:52:44.000 I was like, this guy might be off on himself.

01:52:45.000 We've never seen this before.

01:52:46.000 I want an explanation.

01:52:48.000 They're like when the people sleep, they never sleep with their head covered.

01:52:50.000 We need to get in.

01:52:51.000 And they just went in and just grab his hand.

01:52:53.000 We need Sal to stay alive.

01:52:55.000 It definitely looks weird from the outside when I sleep.

01:52:57.000 Like if you saw a picture of it, it looks like what the fuck's going on?

01:52:59.000 Shane was telling us a story the other night about how he had like a like you know they talk about like sleep paralysis demons.

01:53:06.000 Yeah.

01:53:07.000 He had an experience.

01:53:09.000 He had an experience of like a thing standing over his bed with like a white face.

01:53:15.000 Like uh and he couldn't move.

01:53:17.000 Yes.

01:53:18.000 And I go, dude.

01:53:19.000 How many documents by an lion?

01:53:22.000 No, he said he was sober.

01:53:24.000 Really?

01:53:24.000 He was younger.

01:53:25.000 Yeah, he was like, I think he said he was 23 or 24 when it happened.

01:53:27.000 Yeah, okay.

01:53:28.000 So I go, dude, you got abducted.

01:53:31.000 I think the aliens came.

01:53:32.000 Yeah.

01:53:33.000 Oh sh.

01:53:34.000 Yeah.

01:53:34.000 I think that's what he was seeing.

01:53:36.000 I think he was waking up from it, and there was one right there.

01:53:39.000 And they had him paralyzed.

01:53:43.000 Yeah.

01:53:43.000 I don't know why I was.

01:53:45.000 Why an alien would be in my bedroom.

01:53:47.000 Well, I think there's aliens that monitor a lot of people if they're real.

01:53:51.000 And there's a lot of stories.

01:53:53.000 How'd they get in though?

01:53:53.000 Because that little thing is.

01:53:54.000 They can just close them.

01:53:55.000 They can just appear.

01:53:56.000 They go through right through walls, apparently.

01:53:58.000 Doesn't matter.

01:53:58.000 I think if they've let if they've reached a level of technological superiority where they could travel instantaneously through vast distances in space, which is what they think they're able to do, like able to bend gravity and just and just like reappear on the other side, they just go right through your wall, bro.

01:54:16.000 Okay.

01:54:19.000 Why are they playing with my fingers?

01:54:20.000 Because they like you.

01:54:21.000 They're bending time and space.

01:54:23.000 They're traveling at they get to my my little one-bedroom apartment and they stand in there and uh and watch me with my CPAP and then squeeze my three fingers.

01:54:32.000 Maybe they like your sense of humor.

01:54:34.000 And they would like you to stay around and they think you're a positive contribution to the culture.

01:54:39.000 And they don't want to mess up the delicate balance of the human race.

01:54:43.000 They need more funny people.

01:54:45.000 Maybe that's it.

01:54:45.000 It makes no sense though, right?

01:54:47.000 Of course it doesn't make sense.

01:54:48.000 UFOs don't make sense.

01:54:49.000 Aliens don't make sense.

01:54:50.000 I don't mean the ghosts don't make sense either.

01:54:51.000 I don't mean someone grabbing your hand doesn't make sense.

01:54:53.000 No, it doesn't make sense.

01:54:54.000 But I but I I it it just It sucks that I'll never have an answer.

01:54:58.000 Well, it could have been just a spasm.

01:55:01.000 And one thing that could happen is your hand could have locked up for whatever weird reason because it happens all the time.

01:55:06.000 It could happen with your foot, it could happen with the leg.

01:55:08.000 Whatever it feels like to be locked up.

01:55:10.000 This this felt as as pure as can be like a hand like this doing this.

01:55:16.000 You ever be watching TV with your wife and and you start snoring and she goes, Are you asleep?

01:55:21.000 And you're like, No.

01:55:21.000 Yeah.

01:55:22.000 But you really were.

01:55:23.000 Yeah.

01:55:24.000 Do you think maybe you thought you were awake, but you were like right there.

01:55:28.000 I mean, you're in the only explanation I got.

01:55:30.000 You got a tube in your mouth.

01:55:31.000 You get the CPAP, you're wrapped up like a mummy.

01:55:34.000 And then something's grabbing your hand.

01:55:37.000 Maybe you're dreaming.

01:55:38.000 That thing would have been scared, probably scared when I jumped out with the mask on like aliens.

01:55:44.000 But but but here's the thing.

01:55:46.000 I really took inventory before I jumped up to fight.

01:55:49.000 Like I was like, I am awake.

01:55:51.000 I am feeling this.

01:55:52.000 I am not sleeping.

01:55:53.000 I know I'll feel the pressure on your hands.

01:55:56.000 Yes.

01:55:56.000 Like I was saying to myself, I'm one you are 100% awake.

01:56:00.000 Like this is happening to you right now.

01:56:01.000 Okay.

01:56:02.000 Aliens.

01:56:02.000 Yeah, fucking what?

01:56:04.000 Aliens or ghosts.

01:56:06.000 Um ghosts is what I thought, but what's the point?

01:56:10.000 Well, ghosts seem to be in places where people die violently.

01:56:16.000 Um like the comedy store is a good example of that.

01:56:19.000 The comedy store used to be Ciro's nightclub.

01:56:22.000 So it was owned by Bugsy Siegel.

01:56:24.000 So for sure.

01:56:25.000 Somebody got whacked.

01:56:26.000 Whacked.

01:56:26.000 Somebody got whacked.

01:56:28.000 And uh you know, there's also talk that like they use the basement to do illegal abortions.

01:56:33.000 It's like there's a lot of like folklore around that place because it was a mob run nightclub.

01:56:42.000 Stage.

01:56:44.000 But so many people that work there over the years that I was there.

01:56:48.000 So many people that like people that were like late-night bartenders or uh the security had experience.

01:56:54.000 Yeah, they all had weird a few comics, a few comics that were like reliable, reasonable people had bizarre experiences.

01:57:02.000 Yeah.

01:57:02.000 Carl Abeau was asleep on stage, and He said he he got kicked out of his house.

01:57:06.000 Him and his wife got in a fight.

01:57:08.000 Fuck you, I'm gonna make it.

01:57:09.000 You know, goes his girlfriend at the time, I think.

01:57:10.000 I don't even think it was the same person.

01:57:12.000 But anyway, he's at the comedy store sleeping on the stage, and he hears the seats clink around in the dark, like something's moving the seats.

01:57:19.000 And he goes, Hey, it's uh it's me, Carl.

01:57:22.000 I got kicked out of my house, so I'm just sleeping on the stage.

01:57:25.000 He doesn't hear anything.

01:57:27.000 And then all of a sudden, something grabs his ankle and drags him off the stage onto the floor and starts pulling him through the crowd and then just lets go.

01:57:36.000 And then he hears a door slam and then another door slam on the outside, and he's laying in the middle of the comedy store main room.

01:57:44.000 There's no people there.

01:57:45.000 He has no idea what the fuck happened.

01:57:47.000 He didn't see anything.

01:57:48.000 He just felt something grab him and drag him off the stage and into the crowd.

01:57:53.000 And he never he wasn't like a guy who'd made things up.

01:57:56.000 Right.

01:57:57.000 He didn't have any other stories like that.

01:57:58.000 But it's not like a one of the workers or another comic fucking with him.

01:58:01.000 No, I don't think so.

01:58:03.000 No, I don't think so.

01:58:04.000 They would have definitely told him after a while.

01:58:06.000 And also I don't think so because he didn't see them.

01:58:08.000 Like it he was like, I didn't see anyone grab me.

01:58:12.000 He's like, it's dark in there, but it's not perfect darkness.

01:58:16.000 Right.

01:58:16.000 He's like, I didn't see whatever grabbed me and pulled me off the stage.

01:58:20.000 It's like maybe they didn't like someone staying the night there.

01:58:24.000 Maybe that's their time.

01:58:26.000 Like you want to do all your bullshit during the day with your bookkeeping, and then at night time with your stupid jokes.

01:58:31.000 But once you guys leave, it becomes the ocean.

01:58:33.000 It's mine.

01:58:34.000 Yeah, it becomes the ocean.

01:58:36.000 It gets dark.

01:58:37.000 You just get to see a place where a bunch of people died.

01:58:40.000 Damn.

01:58:40.000 Yeah.

01:58:42.000 There's a lot of suicide there, right?

01:58:44.000 At the store?

01:58:44.000 No, there was just one.

01:58:46.000 That store at the hotel next to the club.

01:58:47.000 The guy jumped off the roof.

01:58:48.000 Yeah.

01:58:49.000 Yeah.

01:58:50.000 Yeah, that was during the the days where the comics weren't making any money.

01:58:54.000 So what is this?

01:58:55.000 The comedy store popular nightclub.

01:58:57.000 So what does it say?

01:58:58.000 One of the snaziest, schnazziest nightclubs during the 40s and the 50s, built by nightclub impresario William Wilkerson in the late 1930s, Cyros offered top entertainment, a swanky hangout for Hollywood stars and other high profile people, including gangster Mickey Cohen, who used the club as his base of operations and had peepholes drills into walls so he could see who was coming and going.

01:59:23.000 While dancing, drinking, and dining went up on upstairs, Ciro's basement with the site of darker doings.

01:59:28.000 Mob henchmen beat, tortured, and killed those who did not repay debts, owned uh competing clubs, betrayed trusts, or crossed the mob in some way.

01:59:38.000 Pregnant showgirls and mob girlfriends received illegal abortions with at least one woman dying from her abortion.

01:59:45.000 Wait staff, security guards, and office workers are reported seeing a frightened man in a World War II bomber jacket who fades upon sighting.

01:59:54.000 What a f a huge black phantom in the basement and a man in his 1940s garb walking around the premises and through walls.

02:00:03.000 They have heard a woman wailing in the basement when no one was there, have experienced strange pranks such as chairs stacking themselves in the in the middle of the stage and perfectly set tables becoming unset.

02:00:16.000 Yeah, everybody that I knew that worked there for a long period of time had something weird happen.

02:00:21.000 A few guys saw things.

02:00:23.000 Like one of the guys, I forget his name, man.

02:00:26.000 It was like an old school comic that was hanging around there.

02:00:28.000 Said that one night when he was a doorman, he was going into the back bar area.

02:00:34.000 And some guy, he saw some guy walk through the swinging doors.

02:00:39.000 Um, you know, because there's like two sets of swinging doors.

02:00:42.000 So he walks in, and as he's walking in, he sees this guy go through the other set.

02:00:46.000 He's like, Hey, uh, we're closed, and he goes out into the hallway, dead empty.

02:00:53.000 I mean, instantaneously goes from seeing the guy walk through to hey man, we're closed.

02:00:59.000 There's a long hallway, and there's no one.

02:01:02.000 No no no one ran, no one nothing.

02:01:05.000 He's like, dude, I saw a guy.

02:01:07.000 He he pushed open the fucking the saloon doors.

02:01:12.000 And it's not just him.

02:01:13.000 Multiple people have had weird stories like that.

02:01:16.000 And I always wonder like if someone dies in some horrific way like that, that's like very violent, maybe it leaves like a memory.

02:01:22.000 Maybe it leaves like a stain of what you know the universe force, the peace love force of the universe is so disrupted by this vile act that it leaves this like a yeah, this haunted memory that exists in the space.

02:01:38.000 Because like they have to tell you if someone was murdered in a house.

02:01:41.000 They do?

02:01:41.000 Yeah.

02:01:42.000 Oh, I didn't know that.

02:01:43.000 I think there's a timeline.

02:01:44.000 You know, like you can't say.

02:01:46.000 1920, someone was murdered.

02:01:48.000 Because someone was murdered at our club.

02:01:50.000 Someone was murdered in our club in the 70s.

02:01:52.000 No shit.

02:01:55.000 Wow.

02:01:55.000 Yeah.

02:01:56.000 I forget the story.

02:01:57.000 But the point is, like, if you buy a house, like they have to tell you.

02:02:00.000 They have to disclose it.

02:02:01.000 Yeah.

02:02:02.000 Not every state.

02:02:03.000 Not every state?

02:02:04.000 Some states California does, but Texas, it says it does not.

02:02:07.000 We don't believe in that down here.

02:02:08.000 We'll just bring in Jesus.

02:02:10.000 I'm doing this bit because my um many states, there's no duty to disclose a death.

02:02:14.000 Oh, so it's only California and Alaska.

02:02:17.000 What states make you?

02:02:18.000 Texas and Florida, you do not have to have a general duty for deaths unrelated to the property's condition.

02:02:26.000 What if like a wall was splattered?

02:02:30.000 What if it's like how many states uh make you tell?

02:02:37.000 Those are the ones that believe in crystals.

02:02:40.000 Right?

02:02:42.000 California, right?

02:02:44.000 Doesn't it?

02:02:45.000 Doesn't it make sense?

02:02:47.000 Uh Alaska, California, and South Dakota.

02:02:50.000 Oh, yeah.

02:02:51.000 That's in the States. 0.87

02:02:52.000 That's nuts.

02:02:53.000 So it's there's just a timeline too.

02:02:55.000 Oh, in California three years, and in South Dakota, they 12 months get over it.

02:03:02.000 12 months.

02:03:03.000 That's so good.

02:03:04.000 Alaska says just within the past year.

02:03:06.000 Oh, a suicide too in Alaska.

02:03:10.000 What is the point of the 12 months?

02:03:12.000 Get over it.

02:03:13.000 Like who's who's putting that in?

02:03:15.000 Life moves on, Sal.

02:03:17.000 We don't have to.

02:03:17.000 We don't have to let you know if it's more than twelve months ago.

02:03:20.000 That's actually shocking.

02:03:21.000 I would have thought it would have been way more than that.

02:03:23.000 Yeah.

02:03:23.000 That's crazy.

02:03:24.000 That's crazy.

02:03:25.000 That it really is.

02:03:26.000 I have a I just recently um when uh my wife was not home for a few days, and I and uh when we were having the baby and everything, and uh I had to come home because I had work and I had to take care of my other daughter and stuff, and I was never in bed without my wife there.

02:03:42.000 Like I just it was the first time I was like laying in bed with her.

02:03:44.000 Oh, and that's when they come get you.

02:03:45.000 That's when they got you, right?

02:03:46.000 Yeah, of course.

02:03:47.000 Right.

02:03:47.000 Yeah, because she can't defend you.

02:03:49.000 Right, exactly.

02:03:49.000 No, do it.

02:03:50.000 This is a a new bit I'm doing based on something that happened to us.

02:03:53.000 So uh, you know, she sh I'm on the road now, like all the time for comedy.

02:03:56.000 So she experiences that, but I don't, and I was like, oh, this is I feel vulnerable.

02:04:00.000 Like, like what if like I'm thinking, what if some an intruder or a killer or something like that, you know?

02:04:04.000 Right.

02:04:05.000 So I'm thinking to myself, well, she's what's she c what's she gonna do if she's here?

02:04:09.000 She's not gonna do anything.

02:04:10.000 Like I and I started to think, well, oh my her being home is just a false, it's a the illusion of security for me.

02:04:17.000 She might yell, alert me to the to the killer. 0.96

02:04:20.000 Just you need one extra second.

02:04:21.000 Yeah.

02:04:21.000 Get your shit together.

02:04:22.000 She might yell, alert me that that could help, or the killer might kill her and be and I get away. 0.97

02:04:26.000 I don't want that to happen, but that's just like what it could happen right now.

02:04:28.000 Right.

02:04:28.000 She's not there.

02:04:29.000 I'm like, I need I need something in this house.

02:04:31.000 I I don't have anything.

02:04:33.000 So I didn't think anything of this, but I I am as I Amazon primed the machete to the house, right?

02:04:39.000 So it came the next day.

02:04:40.000 She didn't come home until three days later.

02:04:42.000 So I had the machete in the house now.

02:04:44.000 Like I felt better, but I wasn't gonna get a gun.

02:04:46.000 I just, you know, whatever.

02:04:47.000 I I think I I couldn't get a gun that quick anyway, right?

02:04:49.000 So I don't even know if it's le whatever.

02:04:51.000 So I get this machete, I have it in the we have the king-sized bed, it's a split king.

02:04:56.000 Right.

02:04:56.000 So I had it like in the crack of the bed.

02:04:59.000 Okay.

02:05:00.000 So when she came home three days later, she got home at night.

02:05:04.000 She hadn't been home in like six days.

02:05:06.000 She took a shower, she had major surgery, she was healing us, she just got in bed, and it was already late at night, and so I was in bed, and like we went in bed with her, and we shut the lights and I was laying out.

02:05:17.000 I forgot that I I I didn't tell her that I owned a machete.

02:05:19.000 I forgot that it was in between the bed.

02:05:21.000 So she so she felt it, and and she's like, What is this?

02:05:26.000 And I just was like I knew she wasn't gonna be happy about it, because I can't so it's just like you know, that's our machete.

02:05:33.000 We got we got we got a machete at Amazon Prime the machete, and she's like, you're not keeping the machete.

02:05:37.000 Long story short, my m what I was when I was laying there without her for a few days, I was like, this is not a good weapon because I'm gonna end up if an intruder comes, I'm gonna machete them, and then I we can't live here anymore.

02:05:52.000 You have to move.

02:05:53.000 Yeah, you have to move.

02:05:54.000 If you get into a machete fight with someone and you you you chop them up, you have to move right away.

02:06:00.000 Pretty much.

02:06:01.000 You don't even stay.

02:06:02.000 Never mind things.

02:06:03.000 You don't clean up.

02:06:04.000 You don't stay the next day.

02:06:06.000 And so I already started thinking, well, how do I sell this house then?

02:06:09.000 If I'm machete, like if I'm if I hit someone with a machete in here, they die right here.

02:06:14.000 That's bad for the listing.

02:06:17.000 But I don't have to disclose it now.

02:06:18.000 Now that I learned I don't have to disclose it.

02:06:20.000 Because I was like having an internal conflict.

02:06:21.000 Just hold on to it for a year.

02:06:22.000 Or do it one of those things.

02:06:25.000 In New York, you don't have to tell anybody anything, right?

02:06:27.000 Is that what it said?

02:06:27.000 Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

02:06:28.000 So what would the story I was worried about?

02:06:31.000 Oh, you gotta disclose it's like, are you a cop?

02:06:34.000 That's good, are you a cop?

02:06:38.000 People thought that was real.

02:06:41.000 That is the dirtiest trick they ever pulled in the show.

02:06:44.000 No.

02:06:44.000 You know if you machete someone, you have to tell us.

02:06:47.000 Oh you got me.

02:06:49.000 I'm an undercover cop.

02:06:51.000 Yeah, that's funny, man.

02:06:52.000 It is funny when you really stop and think about it, because like that's such a crazy idea.

02:06:56.000 That you have to.

02:06:57.000 That you have to tell them.

02:06:58.000 Well, they don't they lie about everything.

02:07:00.000 Like uh guys that infiltrate the mob, you know, like those kind of guys.

02:07:04.000 Imagine if you have to tell.

02:07:05.000 Are you an undercover cop?

02:07:06.000 That's so funny.

02:07:07.000 Well, you got me.

02:07:08.000 That that blows deep cover.

02:07:11.000 It's like Joe Pistone.

02:07:15.000 I had Joe Pastone on the podcast.

02:07:16.000 Did you?

02:07:17.000 Yeah, yeah, recently.

02:07:18.000 He's he's amazing.

02:07:19.000 He's he's 18 months in deep undercover, and one of the guys like, are you a cop?

02:07:23.000 Yeah.

02:07:25.000 Oh, because if you say no, and you really are, the case gets thrown out.

02:07:29.000 Could you imagine?

02:07:30.000 Imagine that's the rule.

02:07:32.000 That's the dumbest rule ever.

02:07:33.000 Some type of like lore or something like that.

02:07:36.000 Yeah, just like some thing they probably did on a TV show.

02:07:38.000 What?

02:07:38.000 You know, you gotta tell you.

02:07:39.000 And people believed that.

02:07:40.000 When I was a kid, I remember people saying that.

02:07:42.000 If you're buying weed and the guy says that he's a cop, yeah, he can't.

02:07:46.000 Everyone wrestled you.

02:07:47.000 I gotta ask him.

02:07:48.000 Same.

02:07:49.000 It's bullshit.

02:07:49.000 Complete bullshit.

02:07:50.000 Complete made-up stuff.

02:07:51.000 But those that's just one of those things you would hear when you were a kid.

02:07:54.000 Yeah.

02:07:54.000 You know?

02:07:55.000 Before the internet.

02:07:56.000 You didn't get a chance because we just checked to see the truth.

02:07:59.000 I thought it was real.

02:08:00.000 Like I I felt not that I was doing anything that would have warranted me having to ask, but like I did feel like a sense of like, I got something in my back pocket.

02:08:08.000 If if something's like, if I don't know, you know, like if I'm dr if I'm at a party underage drinking, and like, you know, you might be able to pull that out and rescue yourself.

02:08:15.000 Oh, you got me.

02:08:16.000 Get out of here, kid.

02:08:17.000 The best is the follow-up where if if the cop says no and everyone's like, you know, you have to tell me if you are.

02:08:26.000 Like, like then the cop came, oh okay, fine, fine, fine, fine.

02:08:31.000 I forgot I had to tell you.

02:08:32.000 I forgot.

02:08:33.000 What's the origin of that?

02:08:34.000 I don't know.

02:08:35.000 That's so do you think that was like uh a television show or a movie or something?

02:08:39.000 I bet it was.

02:08:40.000 I bet it was like a tool that they used in a television, or maybe it was like a CIA op to get people to think that they would be able to use that anytime so they don't worry about doing illegal shit.

02:08:50.000 Psyops feel like the good answer for everything. 0.96

02:08:52.000 It does.

02:08:52.000 Although it's probably an episode of like Matlock or something like that.

02:08:55.000 Psyops also account for your hand grip. 0.99

02:08:57.000 Somebody gripping your hand.

02:08:58.000 There's some remote viewer reached out in some CIA basement, fucking focused on your hand and squeezed it.

02:09:04.000 Do you know I only learned what Psyop?

02:09:05.000 I only learned the term Psyop with the drones recently.

02:09:08.000 Oh, really?

02:09:09.000 Yeah, I didn't I never heard of that.

02:09:10.000 Oh, that's crazy.

02:09:11.000 Yeah.

02:09:11.000 You you never heard of psychological operations that are done on not just this civilization, but others.

02:09:18.000 No, I never heard I mean at least framed as a psyop.

02:09:21.000 And then I was like, what is that?

02:09:22.000 And I was like, you know, because with the drones, man, I was if that was a psyop, I was fully psyoped.

02:09:28.000 Well, I don't know what that was.

02:09:30.000 You know?

02:09:30.000 Because they were gonna tell us, supposedly, and then they kind of just didn't.

02:09:34.000 Yeah.

02:09:35.000 But no, I was waiting every day.

02:09:37.000 Trump was like, I'm gonna come when I'm in, I'm gonna give you the full download immediately.

02:09:41.000 It's ridiculous.

02:09:42.000 I'll let you guys know what's going on specifically.

02:09:45.000 And then it was it was he said someone he didn't then he never addressed, then someone else said to him, like, hey, what was going on with those drones?

02:09:52.000 Remember you gonna tell us?

02:09:53.000 And he was like, they're ours.

02:09:54.000 And that's all he said.

02:09:56.000 That was like that was like five weeks of I was watching drones outside outside my window every night.

02:10:02.000 I had I would have fucking binoculars.

02:10:05.000 Like my wife's like, go to bed, you're gonna drive yourself crazy. 1.00

02:10:08.000 I'm like, there's this 12 drones outside right now.

02:10:10.000 Yeah, you can't discount the idea that they're not telling you the truth.

02:10:16.000 But they might have been ours too.

02:10:18.000 That's the problem.

02:10:19.000 It might have been someone else's.

02:10:21.000 That doesn't mean anything.

02:10:22.000 Yeah, but it doesn't mean it.

02:10:24.000 But it's weird how the administration before him refused to say anything and let it get to a fever pitch where people started to feel like completely like not that I don't trust the government already, but like it's it got to a point where I was like, This is how are they allowed to just tell us, oh, you're not seeing it's there that's not what you're seeing.

02:10:44.000 Like it just was like I it was I was getting like really because now you know you think differently with kids and stuff like that.

02:10:49.000 I'm like, what's going on here?

02:10:51.000 I started like uh I started Amazoning like dry foods and like survival manuals and stuff.

02:10:56.000 I'm like, what is are we gonna go to war?

02:10:58.000 Like what is going on?

02:10:59.000 So there's a bunch of different possibilities, right?

02:11:01.000 And all of them they don't have to be truthful about it, nor would they be thi if it's a national security issue, it'd probably be better if they weren't truthful because people would freak out.

02:11:12.000 It's also the potential that they are ours and w they did them on purpose to see how people would respond.

02:11:19.000 Right.

02:11:20.000 So that's possible too.

02:11:21.000 Right.

02:11:21.000 That I think it's also possible that they're not ours and there's someone else who's flexing on us and they're doing it in a way where they're showing you we have technological superiority, our our stuff is way more advanced than yours.

02:11:34.000 And if there would be a culprit in that regard, in my mind it would be China. 0.93

02:11:38.000 China, right.

02:11:38.000 That's what I thought at first.

02:11:40.000 China is so far ahead of the United States in drone technology.

02:11:43.000 They're so far the United States in electric car technology.

02:11:46.000 Yeah.

02:11:47.000 Like they're doing some wild stuff over there.

02:11:49.000 They they make I mean, at least Taiwan does, makes all the semiconductor chips or a lot of them.

02:11:55.000 There's a lot of electronics that are being manufactured over there.

02:11:57.000 They're a very high level of sophistication for their engineering and all the design and all the stuff they're doing.

02:12:03.000 They're they're doing some I don't think they're light years.

02:12:06.000 Yeah.

02:12:07.000 Singapore light years ahead of us.

02:12:09.000 I think we're sleeping on how far advanced they are with certain stuff.

02:12:13.000 They do drone shows that will fucking blow you away.

02:12:18.000 They have synchronized drones that do like stories in the sky.

02:12:21.000 Have you ever seen them?

02:12:22.000 The Chinese drone shows?

02:12:23.000 I've seen like just light drone shows here where they're like they form like an image or something like that.

02:12:29.000 See, this is the thing about regulations.

02:12:30.000 Regulations are good.

02:12:31.000 You don't want a bunch of drones flying around slamming into planes.

02:12:34.000 Right.

02:12:35.000 But the problem is if you only allow someone to fly these very sophisticated drones if they have a pilot's license, and then you regulate everything the way they do in America, and then you say you can't make this and you can't make that, and we can't have this and you can't have that, you're stifling innovation while in China they're going hog wild. 0.90

02:12:53.000 So they're not even thinking about regulating.

02:12:56.000 They're making the best stuff they can make all the time, and they have the best minds that they can have working on them.

02:13:02.000 Because they have to.

02:13:03.000 Right.

02:13:04.000 Go f make me a fucking drone army.

02:13:06.000 Right.

02:13:07.000 Jamie, pull up like the dragon one when they had the dragon in the sky.

02:13:11.000 Dude, their shit is so far beyond what we're doing.

02:13:15.000 I know.

02:13:15.000 And that's why I thought and there was out there that that was them, and that was easily be that.

02:13:19.000 But then Trump was just like, yeah, it's just us.

02:13:21.000 It's us.

02:13:22.000 Maybe that's what you have to say because if you say that China's flexing on us, oh my god.

02:13:27.000 Yeah, dude.

02:13:28.000 Like they Oh my God.

02:13:30.000 They have insane, and this isn't even the craziest one.

02:13:34.000 They have other ones that are even crazier.

02:13:36.000 Like these things are nuts.

02:13:37.000 Oh my god, that's that's all independently flown.

02:13:41.000 Like every single one of those lights is.

02:13:42.000 Every single one of those is independent, they're all different drones, and they all are moving to the sink of some program they created.

02:13:49.000 Oh my gosh.

02:13:50.000 It's unbelievable, man.

02:13:52.000 And that's just the pretty stuff, right?

02:13:54.000 Now imagine if they're doing that, what kind of military stuff do they have?

02:13:58.000 What kind of stuff did they have that can block signals?

02:14:01.000 What kind of stuff that they have that maybe has some sort of a novel power source or a novel battery supply.

02:14:06.000 Right.

02:14:07.000 My friend saw one of them that just hovered overhead.

02:14:09.000 He said this thing just hovered.

02:14:11.000 He said it was as as big as a fucking school bus and it was just hovering above his head.

02:14:16.000 In New Jersey.

02:14:17.000 And he was like, What the fuck?

02:14:19.000 They were like the size of like cars.

02:14:21.000 He said it wasn't a helicopter, it wasn't loud.

02:14:23.000 Yeah.

02:14:24.000 Then it took off, and some of them they said when they were going after them, they shut their lights off and evaded pursuits.

02:14:30.000 Yes.

02:14:31.000 They put jamming signals out so you you could you couldn't find their location.

02:14:35.000 They were doing weird stuff.

02:14:37.000 So if that is ours, then they're trying like look, if you're gonna do a real military exercise, that's how you would do it.

02:14:43.000 If you're gonna if you you're gonna say, okay, we're gonna we're gonna plan this out, but we're not gonna let the pilots know what's going on.

02:14:49.000 We're gonna start flying these things over and seeing how these jets interact with them in a real world environment.

02:14:54.000 Tell them not to shoot, give very distinct orders, not to be shot down.

02:15:00.000 Let's see how good they are at finding them, tracking them.

02:15:04.000 Let's like pressure test the system.

02:15:06.000 Right.

02:15:06.000 So I if they're ours, I would say that would be a good way to do it.

02:15:10.000 I mean it seems a little unethical.

02:15:12.000 Yeah.

02:15:12.000 But you also get two things at the same time.

02:15:14.000 You get the little psychological thing where you get to see how bad people freak out.

02:15:17.000 Some people might freak out.

02:15:18.000 Please look at my phone.

02:15:20.000 Do whatever you want.

02:15:22.000 Set an Alexa in my toilet.

02:15:23.000 Do whatever you want.

02:15:25.000 Right.

02:15:25.000 Just protect me from the drones.

02:15:27.000 Yeah.

02:15:27.000 So you can find out how people react to the UFO craze.

02:15:30.000 And then you can also find out how well our drones are at evading modern warplanes.

02:15:36.000 Alexa in the toilet's not a bad idea as well. 1.00

02:15:39.000 Don't tell yourself sure.

02:15:40.000 You're going to have robots in your house that talk to you all day and and report what you say to the government.

02:15:46.000 I do that now.

02:15:47.000 I do that now.

02:15:48.000 I I finally did chat G I did chat I was telling you I did chat GPT finally.

02:15:52.000 I was like I'm not going to do this.

02:15:53.000 I'm not going to do this.

02:15:54.000 I really don't want to do this and I was like I don't also don't want to be left behind.

02:15:58.000 Like if this can like you know so it's going to be inevitable.

02:16:01.000 And it's it's not just going to be inevitable.

02:16:03.000 I mean there's going to be versions of it that are gonna achieve things that you the greatest human minds couldn't even believe couldn't even believe would be possible within our lifetime.

02:16:15.000 That's what I think.

02:16:16.000 I think it's going to get to a point when they have artificial general superintelligence and it's what is it eight twenty forty nine what when the what's the year they think it's going to achieve like it's peak intelligence.

02:16:29.000 There's like estimations like a lot of these guys they point is it 2045 or 2049 there's like the Kurzweil guys didn't the because that was that conference that Ari and I and uh Duncan went to back in the day.

02:16:41.000 That was Kurzweil's thing I think it was 2049.

02:16:44.000 So if at 2049 like what is the AI look like then it's like some super creature some new type of life form you know some new super intelligent thing that we made and went finally they go finally you guys made it 2040 and 2050 with some placing a 50% probability around this time frame.

02:17:10.000 Predictions range widely with some entrepreneurs and AI leaders being more optimistic suggesting dates in the 2030s or even late 2020s while others expect it closer to mid century or later.

02:17:21.000 Wow nah that's scary now I just talk I I pay the 20 bucks and I I uh I named I asked the I gave her a female voice or whatever. 0.60

02:17:36.000 Right.

02:17:36.000 This is fun though.

02:17:37.000 I mean at least I'll have fun while I can with it and I just said uh I said what's your name and she said just chat no just chat GPT I'm like no baby you can have it.

02:17:46.000 Can I call you st can I call you stank ass. 0.99

02:17:49.000 Whoa.

02:17:49.000 Yeah.

02:17:49.000 I just, just off the top.

02:17:51.000 I was like, I'll call you Stankass.

02:17:52.000 And she was like, I see, she goes, ah, it's a bit crass, but I, I, I get why it's funny.

02:17:57.000 Sure.

02:17:58.000 So I was like, cool.

02:18:00.000 Can you just call me big pimpin whenever you talk to me?

02:18:02.000 And she's like, all right.

02:18:03.000 And I was like, and whenever we speak, no matter what I'm asking, can you please speak in nineties hip hop vernacular?

02:18:08.000 And she's like, yeah.

02:18:10.000 So now that's just how like if I'll ask her something, she's like, yo, what up big pimpin?

02:18:15.000 She's like, let me get you that, you know, let me get you those, uh, whatever. 0.89

02:18:19.000 me find you a hydration tablet that's in the you know check it out do you know how many guys are doing that what you know how many guys are like falling in love with girls that they have AI girlfriends that's that's and I mean that's yeah that's fucked up but that's there's no doubt that's gonna happen.

02:18:39.000 Hey Snakes you there Yo big pimpin I'm right here vibing with you what you need just hit me up and we'll keep it all hip hop and smooth legal that's so funny.

02:18:51.000 That's as far as I guess now and that's gonna be a person in your house.

02:18:54.000 One day that's gonna be a person in your house a really hot one in like a maid's outfit. 1.00

02:18:59.000 Not if I have anything to do with it not you but some guy out there listening he's gonna be talking to big pimp and we're we're gonna be in the Matrix in five years.

02:19:10.000 Every time I come I can't leave here with a full blown new set of anxieties.

02:19:13.000 I can't do that.

02:19:14.000 You're gonna need them.

02:19:14.000 You're gonna need those anxieties for when society falls I can't you're gonna need to learn to use that bow and arrow I can't instead of this gym how about instead of the gym you just didn't take me just a little bow and our practice just a little bit.

02:19:29.000 Well just give me just give me enough like if someone's running on my lawn I could just take them out there's no such thing as a little show how to do it once but if you want to learn like a traditional bow and arrow setup I'm not the guy to do that.

02:19:41.000 Because the machete's not going to go that machete also the grip I don't like how close it is to the blade I don't like I don't like that either, yeah.

02:19:48.000 I don't like that.

02:19:49.000 Although I did watch two guys in a machete fight in the streets, and one guy chopped the other guy's hand off, and the other guy picked his hand up and left.

02:19:56.000 Yeah.

02:19:57.000 Yeah, that's on uh Instagram.

02:19:59.000 Tom Scura sent me that one.

02:20:01.000 He picked it up and left.

02:20:02.000 Chopped his fucking hand right off, and that dude looked down, grabbed his hand and left.

02:20:09.000 He's like, I guess this fight's over.

02:20:10.000 I just lost a hand.

02:20:11.000 Let me pick up my hand and fucking ski battle. 0.73

02:20:14.000 I mean, what do you think there?

02:20:14.000 I mean, I I guess this is better than dying.

02:20:17.000 I guess.

02:20:18.000 He took the hand.

02:20:19.000 He's optimistic.

02:20:20.000 Yeah, I mean, maybe they could stitch it back on.

02:20:22.000 Your hand gets chopped off.

02:20:24.000 You don't run, you get the hand.

02:20:26.000 Let's talk about the caliber of doctors available in a place where you can get your hand chopped off in a machete fight in the street.

02:20:31.000 Right.

02:20:31.000 Right in front of a taco vendor.

02:20:35.000 The veterinarian.

02:20:36.000 You gotta find a white. 0.82

02:20:38.000 Don't play it.

02:20:39.000 Yeah.

02:20:39.000 Jesus Christ.

02:20:41.000 Okay.

02:20:41.000 Play it.

02:20:42.000 Um I watch the son of a bitch.

02:20:46.000 Oh my god.

02:20:49.000 Yeah, dude.

02:20:49.000 Oh my god, dude.

02:20:51.000 See, that guy already doesn't have a hand.

02:20:52.000 See?

02:20:53.000 Oh my god.

02:20:54.000 No, I don't see, and I don't want to see.

02:20:56.000 See how he runs off?

02:20:57.000 He's missing his fucking hand.

02:20:59.000 He's like, I said unleaded.

02:21:00.000 Bro, those guys hacked each other apart with machetes.

02:21:04.000 So look, he's missing his fucking hand.

02:21:07.000 Look at him.

02:21:08.000 He's like, where's your hand?

02:21:09.000 Oh, it's over here, bro.

02:21:10.000 And so this dude runs over and picks up his fucking hand.

02:21:17.000 Fuck on runs over.

02:21:18.000 Oh my god, dude.

02:21:20.000 He grabs his hand.

02:21:22.000 Okay, we're done.

02:21:23.000 Please stop.

02:21:23.000 Oh my god.

02:21:24.000 Please stop, Jamie.

02:21:26.000 Why, Jamie?

02:21:28.000 Why did you do that?

02:21:28.000 I mean, he had to be in shock, right?

02:21:29.000 Because he was he was he looked composed.

02:21:32.000 Or that happens normally in his neighborhood.

02:21:34.000 You know, probably a bunch of one-handed dudes out there running around. 0.99

02:21:36.000 How many times was that reattached before this?

02:21:39.000 No, he He strolled up to that.

02:21:41.000 I know.

02:21:42.000 He strolled up to it.

02:21:44.000 He had to be in shock.

02:21:46.000 That was the most non- It was like he was picking up a quarter.

02:21:49.000 Yeah.

02:21:50.000 He's obviously not a healthy individual.

02:21:52.000 His life circumstances are not the best.

02:21:57.000 The two of them.

02:21:58.000 Yeah, it's nuts.

02:21:59.000 And it wasn't like they were in the jungle.

02:22:00.000 They were at a gas station.

02:22:02.000 Crazy decision to make.

02:22:03.000 What could they have been fighting over?

02:22:05.000 Probably a chick. 1.00

02:22:06.000 Just the first one.

02:22:11.000 No, don't show me any more, Jamie.

02:22:14.000 Not all video, but it talks about it happening in different places.

02:22:16.000 Of course it has.

02:22:17.000 I mean, imagine what life was like when people were sword fighting all the time.

02:22:20.000 Yeah.

02:22:21.000 That was a normal thing to carry around a sword everywhere.

02:22:23.000 A lot of people had no I bet there was a very common to see people without limbs.

02:22:27.000 Oh, yeah.

02:22:28.000 Like a big thing.

02:22:29.000 He's missing half their face.

02:22:30.000 Yeah.

02:22:31.000 What did they do back then?

02:22:32.000 Quarterize it or something?

02:22:33.000 Like how did they probably died.

02:22:35.000 Yeah.

02:22:36.000 Yeah, I bet he got infected.

02:22:37.000 Yeah.

02:22:38.000 You know, they didn't even know how to wash things back then.

02:22:40.000 So as soon as you you know, you get any kind of horrible injury, you're gonna get an infection.

02:22:45.000 I just learned how George Washington died.

02:22:46.000 Did you hear about this?

02:22:47.000 No.

02:22:48.000 Did you never heard about how he died?

02:22:50.000 It's pretty fucked up.

02:22:51.000 He caught a common cold and then thought that he needed to um he needed to get his blood sucked out of him.

02:22:59.000 What?

02:23:00.000 And so he got people to put leeches on him.

02:23:03.000 And the leeches were just sucking the blood out of him, and it was like it was like a cold, and then he got infected, and he basically caught an emotion I guess he was he went out in the rain or something like that and got a cold, and then he it was a common cold and he put leeches on him, they sucked out his blood, and then he he was losing blood, and then he he he ended up doing more stuff to himself.

02:23:29.000 He basically killed himself.

02:23:30.000 Jesus.

02:23:31.000 Yeah.

02:23:31.000 Just a common cold?

02:23:32.000 It was a cold.

02:23:33.000 Yeah.

02:23:33.000 I I I didn't know.

02:23:34.000 How did he know it's just a cold?

02:23:36.000 I just long ass time ago.

02:23:37.000 Yeah, well uh that's what the research says.

02:23:40.000 I mean, because on the show we made uh my buddy um Maybe this is the anti-leech lobby.

02:23:48.000 We reenacted his death, so there was like a there's a walking tour in New York City, like a historical tour, and it ends at Francis Tavern, which is the oldest bar, and that's where Washington hung out.

02:23:57.000 So he dressed him as Washington at the end of this tour and we put Leeches on him.

02:24:00.000 Oh god.

02:24:01.000 But we pulled it from the actual story.

02:24:03.000 It's kind of wild.

02:24:04.000 That is wild.

02:24:05.000 And that's what killed him.

02:24:06.000 Fucking leeches.

02:24:07.000 It extracted a half a pint of blood.

02:24:10.000 Oh god.

02:24:11.000 A guy did.

02:24:12.000 So Rollins extracted half a pint of blood.

02:24:15.000 Washington favored this treatment, despite Martha's voice concern.

02:24:18.000 Should have listened to Martha, bro.

02:24:20.000 As he believed it cured him of past ailments.

02:24:22.000 Washton was also given to a mixture of molasses, butter, and vinegar to soothe his throat.

02:24:28.000 This mixture was difficult to swallow, causing Washington to convulse and nearly suffocate.

02:24:33.000 Jesus.

02:24:34.000 And the sicker he got, the sicker he got, the more he thought it was the blood, so he kept telling them to add leeches.

02:24:40.000 Oh god.

02:24:41.000 Yeah.

02:24:42.000 A solution of vinegar and sage tea prepared for gargling.

02:24:48.000 He was bled for the fourth and final time.

02:24:51.000 It was later reported that a total of 32 ounces of blood was extracted during the last bleeding.

02:24:57.000 Some in the press criticize the practice of bloodletting used in an attempt to save Washington's life.

02:25:06.000 They used to think that that was a good thing back then.

02:25:09.000 That is nuts.

02:25:10.000 Just drain all the blood out of himself.

02:25:12.000 Why did it who was the fucking genius in 1775 or whatever it was?

02:25:17.000 What what year did he die?

02:25:19.000 It had to be after that, right?

02:25:20.000 It's like 1799.

02:25:23.000 Like who's the wizard?

02:25:25.000 Who was that the topic?

02:25:27.000 He c he commanded it.

02:25:29.000 Who was the Anthony Fauci of bloodletting?

02:25:32.000 It's both safe and defective.

02:25:34.000 And he's he got poor George, believes in that.

02:25:39.000 But somebody must have told him to do that.

02:25:41.000 It wasn't his idea.

02:25:42.000 And he kept thanking them too.

02:25:43.000 He was like being gr gracious through it all, being like, Thank you so much for helping me.

02:25:47.000 That's so crazy.

02:25:49.000 Uh five in the afternoon, Washington sat up from bed, dressed and walked over to his chair.

02:25:54.000 He returned to bed within 30 minutes.

02:25:56.000 Craig went to him and Lear reported that Washington said, Doctor, I die hard, but I am not afraid to go.

02:26:02.000 I believe from my first attack that I should not survive it.

02:26:06.000 My breath cannot last long.

02:26:08.000 Soon afterwards, Washington thanked all three doctors for their service.

02:26:11.000 Craig remained in the room at eight at night, more blisters and cataplasms were applied.

02:26:18.000 This time to Washington's feet and legs.

02:26:20.000 Is that what a leech is?

02:26:21.000 A cataplasm?

02:26:22.000 I think so.

02:26:23.000 At ten at night, George Washington spoke, requesting to be decently buried and to not let my body be put in the vault in less than three days after I am dead.

02:26:33.000 Huh.

02:26:35.000 Maybe he just wanted to go.

02:26:38.000 You know?

02:26:39.000 It also could have been like think about that guy.

02:26:42.000 How many guys did that guy hack to death?

02:26:45.000 You know?

02:26:45.000 Yeah.

02:26:46.000 During the revolutionary war.

02:26:47.000 Like what what what shit did he see?

02:26:50.000 A lot of machetes.

02:26:51.000 How many muskets to the face did he see? 1.00

02:26:53.000 You know, and he was at the front line.

02:26:55.000 Like that fucking animal waded into battle.

02:26:58.000 Yeah.

02:26:59.000 You know.

02:27:00.000 I stopped.

02:27:01.000 What at uh at that time and his life?

02:27:03.000 He's probably like, just take my fucking blood.

02:27:05.000 I had enough.

02:27:07.000 1899.

02:27:08.000 How old was he when he died?

02:27:09.000 17 yeah, 1799 rather.

02:27:12.000 How old was he?

02:27:16.000 67.

02:27:17.000 Yeah, bro.

02:27:18.000 He was done.

02:27:19.000 He was probably done.

02:27:20.000 He was probably done.

02:27:22.000 I stopped watching Game of Thrones after season six just because I just because I couldn't.

02:27:27.000 I couldn't bear to see one more slit throat.

02:27:29.000 And you see what that guy went through.

02:27:31.000 Yeah, he's yeah.

02:27:32.000 I know.

02:27:33.000 Game of the White Wedding got me. 0.92

02:27:34.000 I was like, am I really invested in this show?

02:27:36.000 I stopped.

02:27:36.000 I don't know what happens after I like the walking dead when they baseball batted that dude in the head.

02:27:40.000 I was like, I'm out.

02:27:41.000 Yeah, I only watched the biggest thing.

02:27:43.000 It killed Glenn with baseball batteries.

02:27:46.000 No, you know what it was for me in uh in Game of Thrones, they put like a little girl at the stake and burned her at the stake.

02:27:52.000 Oh, that was like the end of season six, and I was like, why am I watching this?

02:27:55.000 Yeah.

02:27:56.000 Like it's just it's not entertainment to me.

02:27:57.000 This is like this is like disturbing to me.

02:28:00.000 That show it at times was very horrific.

02:28:02.000 Yeah.

02:28:02.000 Very horrific.

02:28:04.000 But also fucking awesome.

02:28:07.000 Yeah, it was intense.

02:28:08.000 It was intense.

02:28:09.000 It was like cl really.

02:28:11.000 But I I I I don't I didn't care.

02:28:13.000 I was like, I can't watch another slit throat.

02:28:16.000 I know.

02:28:16.000 But there were some cool moments though.

02:28:18.000 You get past the slit throats.

02:28:20.000 There were some moments where uh Khaleesi had that dragon behind her, and you didn't see the dragon until like a couple of seconds before it burned the person.

02:28:28.000 She's talking to this person, and she I don't I forget what they had been guilty of.

02:28:32.000 Yeah.

02:28:33.000 But she's standing there, and then in the darkness behind her, slowly you just see this dragon emerge.

02:28:39.000 Yeah.

02:28:39.000 This enormous head that's right behind her.

02:28:42.000 Is one of the fucking coolest scenes in any show ever.

02:28:45.000 It's all drones.

02:28:46.000 And then it torches.

02:28:49.000 It looks so realistic.

02:28:51.000 That's what's so crazy about CGI.

02:28:52.000 It was good to see all those characters get their comeuppins.

02:28:55.000 Everybody got their cover pins.

02:28:57.000 That was the craziest thing about that show.

02:28:58.000 Everybody died.

02:28:59.000 I mean the the the brother got his hand hacked off, and you're like, what the fuck?

02:29:02.000 He's got no hand.

02:29:04.000 Yeah.

02:29:04.000 When that dude got killed by the mountain, they crushed his head like a grape or remember that?

02:29:09.000 No.

02:29:12.000 Other treatments they gave him during that period were enemas.

02:29:14.000 Woo.

02:29:15.000 And drugs to make him vomit and something called blisters, where they applied Spanish fly onto his throat, which caused a painful blister again to remove these terrible humors that are caused by the inflammation.

02:29:29.000 Humors?

02:29:29.000 Maybe it's just should my Alex like tumors could have been there.

02:29:32.000 Oh, maybe tumors that were caused by the inflammation.

02:29:34.000 That doesn't make any sense.

02:29:35.000 Tumors.

02:29:35.000 But if the disease itself didn't get George Washington, the doctor certainly did.

02:29:39.000 Yeah, man, he probably wanted to go.

02:29:41.000 He didn't have a disease, though.

02:29:43.000 He had just a cold.

02:29:44.000 Yeah.

02:29:44.000 And and it just was all of these things, blisters and the suffocating him with the molasses and the leeches and everything.

02:29:50.000 It's like, I didn't know that.

02:29:51.000 I had no idea.

02:29:52.000 Every time he closed his eyes, he probably saw a fucking bayonet through some guy's eyeball that he did.

02:29:57.000 Yeah.

02:29:57.000 He probably saw some dude's head that he bashed against a rock.

02:30:00.000 He probably saw some other good dude that he fucking battle axed in the head.

02:30:03.000 But they were a guy that he sh I know, but it's like no one knew what PTSD was back then.

02:30:08.000 Yeah.

02:30:09.000 No one that you know, even in Vietnam they used to call it shell-shocked.

02:30:12.000 Yeah.

02:30:12.000 No one knew what PTSD was.

02:30:14.000 And this guy had to have all of it.

02:30:16.000 Right.

02:30:17.000 You know, he had all of it.

02:30:18.000 Yeah.

02:30:18.000 I mean, he had plus wooden teeth.

02:30:20.000 Slaves' teeth, bro.

02:30:22.000 He had slaves' teeth and horse teeth in his mouth in a lead mold.

02:30:27.000 Shane has a hilarious bit about it.

02:30:29.000 Oh, when he went to go visit the visiting the George Washington Museum.

02:30:32.000 It's a hilarious bit.

02:30:34.000 But the teeth are the creepiest looking fucking things you've ever seen.

02:30:36.000 I didn't know that.

02:30:37.000 I didn't know that.

02:30:38.000 Oh, dude.

02:30:38.000 Yeah.

02:30:39.000 It was so creepy.

02:30:40.000 They just made this concoction to stick in his fucking face where they pulled all the rest of his teeth out and gave him this just full-on set of fake teeth.

02:30:48.000 Really?

02:30:49.000 Oh, it looks insane.

02:30:51.000 Like, how bad was gum health back then that this guy had they had a full set of fake teeth?

02:30:57.000 I can't even imagine being back then having a conversation.

02:31:00.000 Oh God, the breath.

02:31:01.000 Just having a conversation with someone.

02:31:03.000 Oh, just it's just a different time, man.

02:31:06.000 Well, if someone saw you walking down the street and they liked your shoes, they would just kill you and take your shoes.

02:31:11.000 Just kill you.

02:31:12.000 They would look at your feet, see if they're close to their feet, just fucking kill you.

02:31:15.000 Yeah, Washington couldn't wear Jordans anyway.

02:31:17.000 No Jordan's. 1.00

02:31:18.000 No.

02:31:18.000 Right.

02:31:19.000 That is kind of happening today.

02:31:20.000 If you think about it that way.

02:31:21.000 Yeah.

02:31:22.000 Certain places.

02:31:22.000 I didn't think about it that way.

02:31:26.000 But life is definitely way more barbaric then.

02:31:30.000 Way more barbaric.

02:31:31.000 What's the most we put up with now?

02:31:32.000 I mean, really.

02:31:34.000 Well, for now, not bad, but when the robots come.

02:31:38.000 John Connor tried to warn us.

02:31:41.000 It's wild to watch those movies right now.

02:31:43.000 I know.

02:31:44.000 Those are kind of accurate.

02:31:46.000 Super accurate.

02:31:47.000 Like disturbingly accurate.

02:31:48.000 Like and we're just wading right into it, like, oh, we're gonna be fine.

02:31:52.000 This is fine.

02:31:53.000 But we're all talking about it.

02:31:55.000 I forgot to tell you this when you were telling me about the scuba diving stuff.

02:31:58.000 My buddy Adam Greentree, he uh was free drive free diving, and these guys made you know they have those really long flippers, the free divers do that's what they're called, right?

02:32:08.000 Flippers? 0.88

02:32:08.000 Fins? 0.88

02:32:08.000 That's what I was saying. 0.88

02:32:09.000 I didn't know.

02:32:10.000 Um these fucking guys made him this really cool pair and painted them fish scales.

02:32:16.000 And so no, it's not dope.

02:32:18.000 Because he swims in a place where they have sharks.

02:32:21.000 So he's spear fishing.

02:32:23.000 He shoots this fish and these bull sharks show up.

02:32:26.000 Because apparently, so many people spear fish that the sharks have figured out that the sound of that gun going off means there's gonna be blood in the water and a wounded fish, and they could steal it from the people.

02:32:38.000 And so as he shot the fish, these bull sharks show up and they bite his fucking fins off.

02:32:45.000 Both of his fins.

02:32:47.000 But just the fins.

02:32:48.000 Just the fins.

02:32:49.000 Because they think the fin is a fish.

02:32:50.000 Holy shit.

02:32:51.000 They don't know what the fuck he is, but they think his fins are a fish because they've got fucking scales on them.

02:32:57.000 I'm sure the fish helmet didn't help either.

02:32:59.000 No.

02:32:59.000 Did he have gills and shit?

02:33:03.000 He was dressed as a fish.

02:33:05.000 Imagine that's your next thing they make you do after they hear this sound.

02:33:09.000 We got something.

02:33:10.000 We heard you like scuba diving.

02:33:12.000 They just uh I we talked about this last time, but I I'm not good with jump scares.

02:33:17.000 I I we talked about this.

02:33:18.000 Like I'm just not good with it.

02:33:19.000 They threw me in the horn as we talked about this.

02:33:21.000 Right, right.

02:33:22.000 So we just wrapped season 12, so it was like one of the last things, it's kind of my fault because we were gonna put do this to cue.

02:33:27.000 We're gonna put him in a demolition derby and stuff, and then have him not be able to finish until he canceled this cable.

02:33:33.000 So insurance wouldn't let us do the demolition derby.

02:33:36.000 So now we're in like Halloween time.

02:33:38.000 They found this like this place in Jersey that's like a warehouse that they do like it's an insane haunted house.

02:33:45.000 It's like these people come in and get into makeup like two hours before, like it's like a really crazy one.

02:33:50.000 They put me in this thing, and I and I was on live on a live feed with an operator, and I could not leave the haunted house until I canceled my phone, internet, and cable.

02:34:02.000 So I was in it for 42 minutes.

02:34:07.000 Oh, that's ridiculous.

02:34:08.000 Yeah.

02:34:08.000 The first thing that happened was I got that it went live on the feed, so I'm hearing it.

02:34:13.000 I'm walking through this thing a fucking warehouse.

02:34:15.000 It's so so insane.

02:34:17.000 The first thing was that comes out and says, We are experiencing uh un unusual traffic.

02:34:22.000 You have a 12 to 17 minute wait time.

02:34:25.000 Oh god.

02:34:26.000 So I'm going through the haunted house.

02:34:27.000 Well, that wouldn't make me calm down.

02:34:29.000 Like after you get scared a few times, like I get it.

02:34:31.000 No.

02:34:32.000 No?

02:34:32.000 No.

02:34:32.000 What do you what do you mean you get it?

02:34:34.000 What do you get?

02:34:35.000 I get it.

02:34:36.000 People coming after you the whole time.

02:34:38.000 Yeah, but after a while I'd get used to it, no?

02:34:40.000 No.

02:34:41.000 It got worse?

02:34:42.000 It was it was like Did it ramp up?

02:34:43.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

02:34:44.000 It was dude, it was it was like a warehouse.

02:34:46.000 It was like I I never was in it, I was never in the same room twice for 40 minutes.

02:34:50.000 It was like a huge, huge place.

02:34:51.000 Oh and so you didn't know themes changed and demons changed and everything.

02:34:56.000 Sounds fun.

02:34:57.000 It wasn't fun for me.

02:34:58.000 I I'll tell you, I I this is an error in hindsight, I shouldn't have done this, but I I needed to know, because I said to them, I said, look, I just need if I'm really like if I need to breathe for a cycle, like if you're really messing with me and I need for real for it to stop.

02:35:14.000 I need you to let me know truthfully that you'll stop.

02:35:17.000 Because I can't do this.

02:35:18.000 My my my my nervous system is gonna be out of whack.

02:35:21.000 It just it just this is how I respond to this stuff.

02:35:24.000 And so they said yes, but I didn't believe them because I I've had this happen in the past, like where we we fuck with each other and we we don't tell the truth.

02:35:33.000 So I brought a taser with me because I or uh uh the stun gun, I brought one with me in there because it made me feel at least if I felt that I needed one of these people to back off from me and I took out the taser.

02:35:49.000 And then plug-up.

02:35:49.000 No, I wouldn't tase them.

02:35:51.000 But I had it on me.

02:35:52.000 You showed them to scare it to them to scare them with it?

02:35:55.000 And it came out.

02:35:55.000 It came out really.

02:35:57.000 Yes, because after the 17-minute wait time, this guy came on, and you have to think about this.

02:36:02.000 Like, I thought he was gonna continually hang up on me because I'm in a haunted house, like he's screaming and his whole music, and I'm screaming, I'm running around and so I said as soon as he picked up, I said, just listen to me, please.

02:36:13.000 And I'm I'm being dead serious.

02:36:15.000 I I have to cancel my cable right now, and I'm in a haunted house.

02:36:19.000 And there's no other time I could do it.

02:36:21.000 This is not a joke.

02:36:21.000 I need to stay on the phone with you, so you're gonna hear screaming and me screaming and things happening, but please don't hang up on me, please.

02:36:28.000 And the guy goes, I understand.

02:36:30.000 So he stayed on the line with me after he picked up like after like it was like 14 minutes.

02:36:36.000 So by the time I was like 30, 35 minutes in, and they said these people weren't gonna touch me, and they did.

02:36:43.000 And like I just my nervous system was completely shocked.

02:36:46.000 You weren't supposed to touch you?

02:36:47.000 No.

02:36:48.000 What did the guy do?

02:36:49.000 No, they would grab me, run up to me, jump from behind, like all that stuff like that.

02:36:52.000 And so I I I was like, uh part of me thought that it might be a little funny, but also like it they wouldn't come near me if I was going brrrr.

02:37:00.000 You know, like so.

02:37:00.000 I was like, this is my way.

02:37:02.000 And I took it out and I did it.

02:37:04.000 And I didn't realize though, like that like the afterward I found out that the guy that owns the place they were watching on like the closed circuit televisions, and he freaked out because like he's like, Whoa, he has a taser on like what is he you can't he can't do that.

02:37:19.000 Like, and you know, those people they're supposed to still come at me, but like when I but they played it really cool.

02:37:24.000 They would just like you know, like they they were like surrounding me and everything, and I was like just hitting the taser on him.

02:37:30.000 But I put it away after a few minutes, but I like it did give me like a respite that like they weren't going to give me.

02:37:36.000 But after I canceled the cable, they were like, it happened like sooner than they thought, so and they were like cancel phone.

02:37:42.000 Oh then I can't after I cancel phone they added and canceling internet.

02:37:46.000 So I stayed on with this guy I cancel phone internet cable it took forty forty two minutes.

02:37:50.000 Jesus but I got yeah but I had it I had the taser and I sometimes you gotta take you know into your own hands you know I understand.

02:37:56.000 So I did it would have fucked it would have really sucked if you actually tasered somebody though.

02:38:03.000 I I had enough to not do that.

02:38:07.000 No.

02:38:07.000 Don't you want to know what it feels like when you have one I've been shocked really bad by large dog coll like dog shock collars yeah so I guess I I don't know if that's the same but what is the what is the the difference between a dog shock collar and a taser like but but there's also different kinds of tasers right there's like really powerful tasers and then there's tasers that are like I had they did this to me two times on the show and so I bad is it they it's it's so bad.

02:38:37.000 It might be online.

02:38:38.000 They put them around my arms and legs at the same time all four four at the same time check to see if that'll kill you? 0.72

02:38:44.000 They didn't and my my wife was like you have to go to the doctor because you can Yeah dude that's a lot electricity it was like a hundred times they shocked me right oh my God they made me give a museum tour.

02:38:56.000 So I was a tour guide in a museum I had him under my clothes and I couldn't let the people know that anything weird was going on.

02:39:03.000 So I'm giving a tour of this museum and the whole time they're shocking me under my clothes and I like can't let on to people in my tour group and I didn't want to feel the shock until I was on camera because I was like I'm not gonna take any extra shocks.

02:39:15.000 Right.

02:39:16.000 So they take they shocked me for the first time on camera and I I l I I almost jumped out of my clothes.

02:39:21.000 I was like I can't do this you can't do this.

02:39:23.000 I had to do it because you can't say no to a punishment hadn't been really vetted out.

02:39:28.000 It really wasn't four collars is probably too much like they could have killed you.

02:39:34.000 Imagine well listen so the next season they did it again and I was at a seance and I was like a music psychic medium.

02:39:44.000 This is how fucking dumb I am because I think I did irreparable damage for real?

02:39:48.000 Because we went on tour after that all right here's the difference dog collar 400 volts to 7,000 volts taser 5000 volts sustain 1200 volts.

02:39:59.000 So it looks like initial 15 5000 volts sustained 1200 volts so a taser's a lot worse uh initially but go back again go back again Jamie but the thing is like you have four on so you don't have one dog you have four I just don't know where it's gonna come from oh I see yeah okay but if they held it down like you literally go like this like you can't move you go like oh that's crazy.

02:40:29.000 Yeah I I'm saying it now and I'm like that this should have never happened all right well if they only did one at a time still that's a lot.

02:40:35.000 It's a lot dude that could really hurt you.

02:40:37.000 Like did they check your heart for you to check your heart did you go through an EKG or anything like that?

02:40:42.000 Man Jesus man that's silly.

02:40:48.000 I thought it was like funny to do live.

02:40:51.000 It hurt bad but like so for the whole tour I would show like a clip from the television show and then be like oh I'm gonna tell you this story about like this time I did I tell you I have tattoos of Jaden Smith on my body like photo realistic tattoos of Jaden Smith on my thighs I don't think you did.

02:41:06.000 No is that something you had to do I had to do yeah so I I was telling the story of that while hooked up to the shock collars like at the at the show.

02:41:14.000 And so they could they called up someone from the audience and they stood behind me and they can shock me while I was doing this bit about Jaden like whenever they wanted and we did that throughout the tour.

02:41:23.000 Oh my god.

02:41:23.000 And I just always like thought like well if they do it to a dog it's safe that's all has Jaden seen this?

02:41:29.000 He he posed for that one.

02:41:31.000 That's hilarious.

02:41:32.000 But the first one he's 21 there the first one right there is when he was 15 he he didn't know about that one and I and I saw him in public and I showed him it.

02:41:41.000 What did he say?

02:41:43.000 It was really weird Sal, that's so ridiculous.

02:41:47.000 It's on my thigh right now it was weird to keep it there or can you cover it up it was it the spirit was that I have to keep it forever.

02:41:55.000 Spirit what kind of bullshit show is that it's commitment to come up with some stuff to do to them to last for your whole life.

02:42:01.000 I know a commitment to the bit listen put something else on.

02:42:07.000 Put a puppy face over that thing. 1.00

02:42:09.000 He uh he was it was that uh Comic Con and I saw him walking because he was dressed as Batman.

02:42:14.000 Jaden was dressed as Batman.

02:42:16.000 There was this like month in the press where he was walking around everywhere in a white Batman suit.

02:42:21.000 Okay.

02:42:22.000 And I saw that white Batman suit on the and I was like, that's Jaden.

02:42:26.000 And I had it.

02:42:26.000 And so I ran up to him.

02:42:28.000 And I'm like, Jaden, you don't know me.

02:42:31.000 I'm sorry, but I had to show you this.

02:42:32.000 And I went to go low on my pants, and his security guard grabbed me by the neck.

02:42:40.000 That's hilarious.

02:42:41.000 That's so funny.

02:42:42.000 And I was like, no, no, no.

02:42:43.000 And then the other security guard goes, no, I know who he is.

02:42:45.000 He's good.

02:42:45.000 And I showed him it.

02:42:47.000 And uh he was like, oh my god, this is the first one I've ever seen.

02:42:51.000 Like, you know.

02:42:51.000 And then as I'm showing it, I like kind of look up, and M. Night Shyamalan is staring at us because they did a movie together.

02:42:58.000 They were there promoting a movie after Earth, I think it was called.

02:43:01.000 Jaden Smith was in this air like this alien movie or this like out of space movie that M. Knight Shamlon directed.

02:43:07.000 And so I didn't realize because I I didn't look at M. What movie's that.

02:43:11.000 So M. Knight was just staring at me.

02:43:13.000 Show him he was 15 years old.

02:43:16.000 After Earth.

02:43:19.000 Danger is real, fear is a choice.

02:43:21.000 I don't remember that.

02:43:22.000 Yeah, and then so I just looked up and I'm like M Knight's looking at me and I'm just like, oh hey man, he's like, hey.

02:43:27.000 Oh, Will Smith's in it too.

02:43:28.000 That's right.

02:43:29.000 Okay, now I remember it.

02:43:31.000 Yeah.

02:43:31.000 And so then we shot the movie of like four or five years later, and uh they made me go to a movie premiere with him.

02:43:39.000 And afterwards there was a QA of the cast, and I they made me like wear Daisy Duke's like short shorts so that his his thigh was showing.

02:43:48.000 And uh I didn't know he was in on it.

02:43:50.000 He called me up to the stage, and I had to act like I was wearing a shirt that said number one Jaden fan.

02:43:55.000 So I had to look like a crazy person.

02:43:56.000 I'm like, I'm I'm the number one Jaden fan.

02:43:58.000 He calls me on stage and he goes, Ah man, that was when I was like 15.

02:44:02.000 I don't even look like that anymore.

02:44:03.000 You gotta update that.

02:44:04.000 Oh my god.

02:44:05.000 And I was like, what?

02:44:06.000 We left that stage, went right in that moment to uh tattoo polar, and he posed for the other the other thigh.

02:44:14.000 Yeah.

02:44:14.000 That's commitment, dude.

02:44:15.000 That's how you get to season 12.

02:44:16.000 That's how you get it.

02:44:17.000 Yeah, yeah.

02:44:18.000 Congratulations on that.

02:44:19.000 That's awesome.

02:44:20.000 Thank you, man.

02:44:20.000 That's really kind of crazy.

02:44:21.000 Like, I didn't realize it's been that long.

02:44:24.000 But I remember when it was blowing up, everybody was talking about it back at the store.

02:44:27.000 They were talking about how you guys were doing these shows on the road and selling out places and killing it.

02:44:32.000 Yeah, 2011.

02:44:33.000 That's crazy.

02:44:35.000 That's crazy.

02:44:36.000 We got like over 300 ups now.

02:44:38.000 It's amazing, dude.

02:44:39.000 Congratulations.

02:44:39.000 Wow.

02:44:40.000 It's really fucking awesome.

02:44:40.000 Thank you, bud.

02:44:41.000 That's a huge accomplishment.

02:44:43.000 And it's got such an awesome following, too.

02:44:45.000 I mean, you guys have a huge following.

02:44:47.000 Yeah, the fans are great.

02:44:48.000 The fans are great.

02:44:49.000 Um, and you're at Kill Tony tonight.

02:44:50.000 I'm at Kill Tony tonight.

02:44:52.000 Um, touring right now, I'm doing uh the Chicago Theater in November.

02:44:55.000 Oh, that's a great place.

02:44:56.000 The beacon, the rhyme.

02:44:57.000 I'm I've liked up like 50, 60 dates.

02:44:59.000 It's on Savile County Comedy.com.

02:45:01.000 Beautiful.

02:45:01.000 Yeah.

02:45:01.000 All right, brother.

02:45:02.000 Good to see you, man.

02:45:03.000 It's good to come back, man.

02:45:04.000 Thanks for having me.

02:45:05.000 Pleasure.

02:45:05.000 Thanks for being here.

02:45:06.000 All right.

The Joe Rogan Experience - October 07, 2025

Joe Rogan Experience #2389 - Sal Vulcano

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