The Joe Rogan Experience - Joe Rogan Experience #2445 - Bert Kreischer

00:00:01.000 Joe Rogan podcast, check it out!

00:00:03.000 The Joe Rogan experience train by day, Joe Rogan, podcast by night, all day.

00:00:12.000 Hey, dude, hey, does a red light therapy really help your fucking eyes?

00:00:15.000 100%.

00:00:16.000 I'm doing it.

00:00:16.000 Are we rolling?

00:00:17.000 Yeah.

00:00:18.000 My eyes are so fucked.

00:00:19.000 Yeah.

00:00:19.000 I can't see Joe.

00:00:20.000 Get one of them Gary Brecca beds for your house.

00:00:23.000 Well, there's a bunch of companies that sell them, but you want like a really powerful red light bed.

00:00:27.000 I did it this morning.

00:00:28.000 Dude, it changed my vision.

00:00:29.000 I can't, when I'm in the shower, I can't read shampoo bath gel.

00:00:35.000 Like, I'm like, dude, why do they need to be small?

00:00:35.000 Whoa.

00:00:37.000 Can't you just make it big as fuck so everyone can see it?

00:00:40.000 They're not that small.

00:00:42.000 And then I'm getting out naked, putting on readers to see what I'm fucking.

00:00:42.000 I can't see them.

00:00:46.000 I've washed my hair with conditioner so many times.

00:00:51.000 Yeah, mine was getting bad.

00:00:53.000 Mine was getting where I needed these fucking things, which I haven't picked up in months.

00:00:57.000 I heard you say that and I was like, changed my life.

00:01:00.000 I did went to Waste 12 the other day and I did the red light bed every day, every day, until I Googled how much it costs.

00:01:05.000 That thing's fucking expensive.

00:01:06.000 It's expensive, the real one.

00:01:08.000 But Whitney got one that's not that expensive and it's fixed her eyes.

00:01:11.000 She got one that she just sits in front of every day for like 20 minutes or something like that.

00:01:15.000 I love that.

00:01:16.000 Oh, dude, it's amazing.

00:01:17.000 But the big ones, the beds, they help your whole body recover.

00:01:23.000 Let's put that into perplexity and say, what is the benefits of powerful red light therapy?

00:01:31.000 I fucking, I use AI so much now.

00:01:34.000 In the beginning, I was resisting it so much.

00:01:36.000 Then Perplexity came on as a sponsor.

00:01:39.000 And now instead of searching things online, I just ask the phone.

00:01:44.000 I just pull up the app and ask it a question.

00:01:47.000 I don't have to type anything.

00:01:49.000 And then it gives me an answer.

00:01:50.000 And then I could say, well, what's the benefits of it?

00:01:52.000 And then it'll list out the benefits.

00:01:54.000 And then I'll say, what are the cons?

00:01:56.000 And it'll list out the cons.

00:01:57.000 Like, is there, you know, are there any people that disagree with that?

00:02:00.000 Perplexity?

00:02:01.000 So I got one.

00:02:01.000 Yeah.

00:02:03.000 My questions are always like, they're always more like about me.

00:02:14.000 Why do you look yourself up?

00:02:17.000 No, no, no, not about that.

00:02:18.000 No, I don't look myself up.

00:02:20.000 It's about like my health or my experience in life.

00:02:24.000 Oh, yeah.

00:02:24.000 So like I was like, I was the other day.

00:02:26.000 I was in bed.

00:02:26.000 I was like, all right, I think my generation had the greatest run.

00:02:32.000 Like out of all the generations around, my generation, Gen X, had the greatest run.

00:02:37.000 We got great childhoods, right?

00:02:39.000 Right.

00:02:40.000 We got to experience cell phones.

00:02:41.000 We got to be impressed by the cell phone.

00:02:42.000 Right.

00:02:44.000 We had 9-11, which wasn't great, but it was the time when the country healed, right?

00:02:47.000 Everyone wants a big tragedy, like the JFK shooting.

00:02:50.000 You want that moment where you walk by a bar and they're like, what are you doing?

00:02:53.000 Like, you haven't heard?

00:02:54.000 We got one of those.

00:02:55.000 We had the pandemic, which is insane.

00:02:55.000 Right.

00:02:57.000 Right.

00:02:58.000 We had our music play better.

00:03:00.000 We had rock.

00:03:01.000 We had, I mean, just the internet took off.

00:03:04.000 So we got to experience that.

00:03:05.000 I think my generation, Gen X, has yours too, right?

00:03:09.000 Right.

00:03:09.000 Yeah, I'm.

00:03:10.000 So I asked that to ChatGPT and I was wrong.

00:03:13.000 What do you mean?

00:03:14.000 The greatest generation is actually labeled the greatest generation.

00:03:18.000 It's my grandmother, your grandmother.

00:03:20.000 They experienced horse and buggy.

00:03:23.000 They then went, they saw cars.

00:03:25.000 They saw television.

00:03:27.000 All within the time they had horse and buggy, they saw people land on the moon.

00:03:30.000 I mean, all that shit.

00:03:32.000 Telephones.

00:03:35.000 Who got fucked with the baby boomers? 1.00

00:03:37.000 They were just old enough to not understand cell phones.

00:03:39.000 Like, they got fucked.

00:03:41.000 Millennials got fucked. 0.64

00:03:42.000 Millennials got real fucked.

00:03:44.000 Yeah, I don't know about the greatest generation.

00:03:47.000 I think you're correct.

00:03:48.000 I think the passage of the internet, like the internet going through our lives and cell phones, like I experienced VHS tapes first.

00:03:56.000 Then I experienced answering machines.

00:03:58.000 That was a big one.

00:04:00.000 Caller ID, you know who's calling you.

00:04:03.000 You can just duck people.

00:04:04.000 That was crazy.

00:04:06.000 I remember when caller ID showed up.

00:04:07.000 Then I remember when Star 69 showed up.

00:04:09.000 Oh, where you could block your caller ID.

00:04:11.000 Star 69 was good because you could call people back that were pranking you.

00:04:15.000 Yeah.

00:04:16.000 Like, hey, motherfucker.

00:04:17.000 Like, what?

00:04:18.000 What's going on?

00:04:19.000 Dude, we got prank calls.

00:04:21.000 My kids didn't ever got prank calls.

00:04:22.000 Like, they never understood what a prank call was.

00:04:25.000 The jerky boys.

00:04:26.000 Jerky boys were fucking amazing.

00:04:29.000 Those guys were so funny.

00:04:29.000 Dude.

00:04:31.000 So, those recordings were so funny.

00:04:33.000 You know who did a great fucking prank call recording?

00:04:38.000 Greg Fitzsimmons.

00:04:39.000 Really?

00:04:40.000 Oh, my God.

00:04:41.000 It's hilarious.

00:04:42.000 He did this one we called a rental car place, and he said that the car was on fire because they went to the gas station and they filled up pots and pans with gas and they put it in the back seat.

00:04:53.000 And fucking Bobby's smoking.

00:04:55.000 And now the car's on fire.

00:04:57.000 Like, you got to hear this guy freaking out.

00:04:59.000 What do you mean the car's on fire?

00:05:01.000 It's you can't do that anymore.

00:05:03.000 Dude, Greg, you know when people go like, what kind of music you listen to?

00:05:07.000 And you talk to a real musician?

00:05:08.000 Like, you talk to the Black Keys, right?

00:05:10.000 And then you go, like, what are you guys listening to?

00:05:11.000 They're like, have you heard of the Velvet Thud or something?

00:05:14.000 Right, right.

00:05:14.000 They're both some obscure.

00:05:16.000 Yeah, and they're like, that's what you need to listen to.

00:05:18.000 When people say, I listen to Sunday papers, that's Fitzsimmons and Gibbons podcast.

00:05:23.000 I go, you're real comedy fans.

00:05:25.000 Those are the two funniest human beings alive.

00:05:28.000 Ever.

00:05:29.000 Greg Fitzsimmons.

00:05:31.000 When I got ready for Lucky, I brought him on the road with me.

00:05:32.000 I was like, dude, I trust you.

00:05:34.000 Just tell me where I'm sloppy.

00:05:35.000 Tell me where I'm lazy.

00:05:36.000 Tell me where I'm leaving jokes.

00:05:38.000 And that first night, he was like, you got a minute.

00:05:42.000 And he went through my whole hour.

00:05:43.000 He's like, I think you're leaving this on the table.

00:05:46.000 Dude, those motherfuckers are the funniest dudes alive.

00:05:49.000 Yeah, Greg's awesome.

00:05:50.000 We started out together.

00:05:51.000 We started like one week apart from each other.

00:05:54.000 For real?

00:05:54.000 Yeah.

00:05:55.000 Literally.

00:05:55.000 We went on the road.

00:05:57.000 God, in the early days, Greg and I traveled everywhere.

00:06:00.000 We did open mic.

00:06:01.000 We would drive to Rhode Island, do open mics together.

00:06:05.000 He was a great example of the first dude I ever saw talking about his family on stage, and it wasn't nerdy.

00:06:11.000 Right, right, right.

00:06:12.000 Him and his son ran a train on his wife.

00:06:14.000 What?

00:06:15.000 It was a great joke.

00:06:16.000 He was like, I had my first threesome.

00:06:19.000 It was with my son, so it was a little awkward.

00:06:20.000 I'm fucking Greg's joke up.

00:06:21.000 He goes, my son was breastfeeding.

00:06:23.000 I was getting her from behind.

00:06:26.000 We had the high five in the middle.

00:06:28.000 But I remember hearing that as a, remember when, remember being a dad as a comic was like off limits.

00:06:33.000 Right, right.

00:06:33.000 And I saw that.

00:06:34.000 I just had Georgia.

00:06:35.000 The second person I saw, the first person is Greg.

00:06:38.000 The second person I saw, and I mean, I'm talking just had Georgia, was Louie fucking CK.

00:06:44.000 I went and worked the road with him, and he was doing all the material for that first special that popped for him.

00:06:50.000 And he was talking about his kids, and he was just like, my daughter's a cunt. 1.00

00:06:55.000 And he goes, I know you're not supposed to say that, but what else do you say to someone who won't put their shoes on?

00:06:58.000 They're a cunt. 1.00

00:06:59.000 We're trying to leave the house and they won't put their shoes on.

00:07:01.000 Imagine if you wouldn't leave.

00:07:02.000 And it was just like, and it was like, I'm sitting there, you know, lost in like what I thought was stand-up was like some imitation of Dane, you know?

00:07:09.000 And I'm watching Louie going like, this is something totally different.

00:07:13.000 Yeah.

00:07:15.000 Those guys, best prank call I've ever heard, sidebar, Brendan Walsh.

00:07:20.000 Brendan Walsh is a funny motherfucker.

00:07:22.000 Brendan Walsh.

00:07:23.000 I don't know.

00:07:23.000 What's he up to?

00:07:24.000 I think he does like a, like, he's always been like more, more art comedy, you know, like more like performance.

00:07:32.000 He does these podcasts where he puts a neck brace on, a wig and giant glasses, and he plays a character.

00:07:38.000 He's a funny dude, man.

00:07:39.000 Do you remember?

00:07:40.000 He was an Austin guy.

00:07:41.000 He was an Austin guy.

00:07:42.000 Yeah.

00:07:42.000 He was, he was, I remember he was, do you remember he was on your podcast?

00:07:46.000 He was, I remember him telling the story, and I think about this all the time.

00:07:48.000 A circuit city had closed by his house.

00:07:52.000 And so, and he lives in Silver Lake.

00:07:53.000 Do you remember?

00:07:54.000 That's right.

00:07:54.000 He made a prank.

00:07:55.000 We told everybody he was turning into a Whole Foods.

00:07:58.000 And he got everybody so excited.

00:08:00.000 Oh, Whole Foods is giving you Silver League.

00:08:03.000 He just did it for himself.

00:08:04.000 So he could be at the coffee shop and hear people talking about Whole Foods.

00:08:11.000 He did a prank call.

00:08:13.000 I think Stanhope sent it to me.

00:08:14.000 He's like, this is the best prank call ever.

00:08:16.000 And it's Brendan calling a phone sex.

00:08:20.000 And you know, they always try to keep you on the line.

00:08:22.000 Right.

00:08:23.000 So he's like, hey, what are you wearing?

00:08:24.000 She's like, nothing.

00:08:25.000 He's like, nothing.

00:08:25.000 What are you wearing?

00:08:26.000 And then you hear like a dog barking in the back.

00:08:29.000 And she goes, is that your dog?

00:08:31.000 He's like, yeah, ignore him.

00:08:32.000 Ignore him.

00:08:33.000 And then the dog barks a little longer.

00:08:34.000 And he's like, tell me what you're touching yourself.

00:08:36.000 And then you hear a baby crying in the back.

00:08:38.000 And he's like, she's like, is that your baby?

00:08:40.000 And he's like, no, it's fine.

00:08:41.000 It's a different room.

00:08:41.000 It's fine.

00:08:42.000 I'm totally fine.

00:08:43.000 And then you hear a woman come in and go, are you on the fucking phone sex again? 0.65

00:08:47.000 And he's like, hey, leave me alone.

00:08:48.000 And she's like, do you need one to do this later?

00:08:50.000 He's like, don't worry about it.

00:08:51.000 And then you hear a marching band come in playing Alua Lua.

00:08:56.000 And he's just trying to hold her on the line.

00:08:58.000 Dude, I was crying.

00:09:00.000 That is like, you know, not to get too meta about it, but comedy has become so, and I'm a part of this of so self-promotional and put it on.

00:09:09.000 I gotta tell you, it's a new show.

00:09:11.000 When you see someone like Brendan or like, or like Greg and Mike, who just who just do it for the pure, just to make themselves giggle.

00:09:17.000 Yeah.

00:09:18.000 It's so beautiful.

00:09:19.000 Gillis is like that.

00:09:20.000 Yeah.

00:09:21.000 Gillis is Gillis.

00:09:23.000 I always think he's just like a my favorite Shane Gillis story to that I will for the until I die.

00:09:31.000 We're doing we're doing Fully Loaded the first year.

00:09:36.000 And it's Shane's on everyone, Mark's on everyone.

00:09:38.000 Nikki's on everyone.

00:09:38.000 It's like it's stopped.

00:09:40.000 It's the best year we probably did it.

00:09:41.000 No offense.

00:09:43.000 And Shane sees my daughter, Georgia, who's being a PA with her friend Daisy.

00:09:47.000 And he's the very last night, and Shane walks up and he's like, you guys sneaking beers?

00:09:52.000 And they're like, no.

00:09:53.000 He goes, oh, come on.

00:09:54.000 I'm not going to rat you out.

00:09:55.000 I'm like, no, we're not.

00:09:56.000 And he's like, come on.

00:09:57.000 You're 18 years old.

00:09:58.000 You're on tour.

00:09:59.000 It's our last night.

00:10:00.000 You guys are sneaking beers.

00:10:01.000 And they're like, we're not sneaking beers.

00:10:02.000 He goes, I can smell the beer on you.

00:10:04.000 And they're like, we've been sneaking beers.

00:10:07.000 And he goes, okay.

00:10:08.000 And he just sits down right next to me.

00:10:09.000 He goes, Georgia's sneaking beers.

00:10:12.000 Did you know she was sneaking beers?

00:10:14.000 No, I had no idea.

00:10:15.000 Shane just fucking ratted her out.

00:10:16.000 She's your daughter.

00:10:17.000 Yeah.

00:10:18.000 You're getting hammered every night.

00:10:19.000 You're not going to notice.

00:10:21.000 Like, dad's drunk.

00:10:23.000 You won't even know if we're drunk.

00:10:25.000 She would, yeah.

00:10:27.000 She, it's funny because I go to like her college and other dads, you know, party.

00:10:32.000 And like, she's like, she doesn't, she's always like kind of low-key about it.

00:10:38.000 Like, the dads will like bite beer cans and kill them and shotgun beers. 0.91

00:10:42.000 I know that's what dads do.

00:10:43.000 Really?

00:10:44.000 Which dad's?

00:10:44.000 Yeah.

00:10:46.000 Oh, yeah, he's dads.

00:10:47.000 Oh, you're in a different school zone.

00:10:50.000 That's what dads do.

00:10:51.000 And I'm always like, you know what?

00:10:53.000 This is what I do for a living.

00:10:54.000 Like, I can fucking murder these guys.

00:10:57.000 She's like, dad.

00:10:58.000 I'm like, oh, you like him crushing a beer and shotgunning it?

00:11:01.000 Fucking, like a microdose.

00:11:03.000 What are we talking about?

00:11:07.000 What were you telling about?

00:11:09.000 I'll show up behind that.

00:11:10.000 Jamie, I'm sorry, but right before we get started, you were telling me about something.

00:11:15.000 The REM sleep or lucid dreaming sleep communication.

00:11:19.000 I got to figure out how I put it.

00:11:22.000 I sent a DM to someone about it, I think.

00:11:24.000 So I got to tell you, before we find that, so Eddie Bravo calls me the other day and he goes, did Bert Kreischer lose everything and then get it back?

00:11:31.000 I go, what?

00:11:32.000 And he goes, yeah, it was so confusing.

00:11:35.000 He was on Shannon Sharp show, and Shannon says to Bert, what was it like?

00:11:40.000 You lost everything.

00:11:41.000 And then you had to build it back.

00:11:43.000 And he goes, it seemed like it wasn't true.

00:11:45.000 I go, it's not true.

00:11:46.000 And I go, did Bert go along with it?

00:11:48.000 He goes, yeah.

00:11:49.000 I go, what?

00:11:53.000 I couldn't wait to talk to you about it because I could totally picture someone saying to you some story that totally never happened and you not wanting to be confrontational.

00:12:03.000 So you just go along with it.

00:12:05.000 Is that what happened?

00:12:06.000 100%.

00:12:07.000 100%.

00:12:08.000 The fucking whole show.

00:12:09.000 How did you not say that never happened?

00:12:12.000 He just caught me off guard.

00:12:14.000 He caught you off guard.

00:12:15.000 I was like, did at any point in time you say, I should probably say this never happened.

00:12:19.000 No.

00:12:20.000 I was like, he's like, you lost everything.

00:12:22.000 In my head, I was like, I did.

00:12:25.000 He was like, but you made it all back.

00:12:27.000 And I go, I did.

00:12:28.000 Where is this coming from?

00:12:29.000 I have no idea.

00:12:30.000 He's that it.

00:12:31.000 And I just was like, uh-huh.

00:12:34.000 Why didn't you say that?

00:12:35.000 I didn't even know what I said after.

00:12:35.000 I don't know.

00:12:36.000 He's like, how did you do it?

00:12:37.000 And I just was like, I don't know, Shannon.

00:12:40.000 I just focused and really started.

00:12:41.000 Like, I have no fucking clue.

00:12:43.000 I should not be allowed to talk on microphones.

00:12:45.000 I literally was like, I don't know what I said even after it, to be honest with you, but I was like, I guess he has it in his notes.

00:12:54.000 So I was like, yeah.

00:12:55.000 So someone must have Googled that Burt Christopher, probably some Reddit thread.

00:13:00.000 Burt Christian lost everything.

00:13:01.000 I guess.

00:13:02.000 And like, you know, the stories about you online are more prevalent than the true ones.

00:13:07.000 So you just go, I guess that's what he heard.

00:13:11.000 And you just went with it?

00:13:12.000 I don't know.

00:13:13.000 That's so weird to do.

00:13:14.000 I was, I had no, I was like, in my head, I was like trying to think.

00:13:19.000 Maybe he was talking about like, you know, I had development deals when I got into the business.

00:13:22.000 Yeah, but you didn't lose them.

00:13:24.000 No, no, no.

00:13:24.000 They gave you money.

00:13:25.000 It just never became a show.

00:13:26.000 But then, no, but I'm saying, like, maybe I was in my head, I was like, maybe he's thinking that, like, you know, I had a lot of development deals early and then I didn't for a few years and I worked the road and maybe that's what he was saying.

00:13:36.000 And then I made, I'm back.

00:13:37.000 I don't know.

00:13:38.000 I was like, but even when you work the road, you work the road.

00:13:40.000 Then you had the travel channel show.

00:13:41.000 There was no period where it made sense.

00:13:44.000 By the way, that is the least of my fish to fry on that fucking show.

00:13:47.000 I got in so much trouble.

00:13:49.000 That show, every clip you do goes viral.

00:13:53.000 Every, I just am like, I was, as when I got done that, I haven't felt this in a long time.

00:13:59.000 I was like, I was like, wow.

00:14:00.000 I was like, I think I'm going to get a lot of text when this airs.

00:14:02.000 Well, it seems like he wants that, right?

00:14:05.000 He's got a lot of people on the show that talk a lot of shit.

00:14:07.000 A lot of people, like Cat Williams, famously, was that that episode was fucking amazing.

00:14:14.000 He just went in on everybody, including me.

00:14:14.000 We talked about it.

00:14:16.000 That's why I got him on the podcast.

00:14:18.000 He's like, Joe Rogan want to have me on.

00:14:20.000 Has the same funny thing about the fuckers?

00:14:22.000 Yeah, same seven unfunny motherfuckers. 1.00

00:14:22.000 Unfunny. 1.00

00:14:26.000 I was like, dude, I love Cat Williams.

00:14:28.000 He's the best.

00:14:28.000 What are you talking about?

00:14:29.000 I'm like, I never met him.

00:14:30.000 Yeah.

00:14:31.000 I had never met him before.

00:14:32.000 It's like, it wasn't that I wouldn't have him on.

00:14:34.000 It's like, I didn't even know he wanted to come on.

00:14:36.000 I would have had him on.

00:14:37.000 That interview was with him, was epic.

00:14:40.000 And accurate.

00:14:40.000 Amazing.

00:14:42.000 The thing about his shit talking is it's not, he's not lying.

00:14:46.000 No.

00:14:47.000 It's, it's, you know, it's when I got out, I was like, it's, I don't, I don't mean this with disrespect, but it's less Shannon, I think more as producers, because he's got cards.

00:14:57.000 So I think the producers are like, what, what clip's going to pop?

00:15:02.000 I think they go online.

00:15:03.000 They try to find controversial subjects.

00:15:03.000 Right.

00:15:06.000 Like he brought up, I told you, he brought up one.

00:15:07.000 He's like, Bert, you think Kevin Hart's just lucky?

00:15:10.000 And I was like, oh, I was like, I said that fucking 12 years ago.

00:15:14.000 And it was just, it was all it was.

00:15:16.000 And I know I'm even, but it was, this is what it was, Joe.

00:15:20.000 It's like, at a time when none of us were making money, not you, but like the younger companies make money.

00:15:26.000 And you're online, you watch Kevin.

00:15:28.000 You know, Kevin knows I love him, but Kevin's like, I'm the hardest working motherfucker.

00:15:31.000 I'm the hardest working.

00:15:32.000 And in my head, I was like, we're all working hard.

00:15:33.000 Like, but a lot of people, you know, were just, you know, waiting for a moment to get in front of people.

00:15:40.000 And then I was like, and then I had an agent very casually, like not mine, but at a thing goes, you know, Kevin should mention how lucky he got.

00:15:47.000 I was like, what do you mean?

00:15:48.000 He was like, you know about Fool's Gold, right?

00:15:50.000 I was like, no.

00:15:51.000 He's like, well, that's the beef between Kevin and Kat is Kat packed a gun in his luggage to go shoot Fool's Gold and he got detained and they were in production and they're like, we need someone small and black to fit these clothes.

00:16:04.000 We already got clothes for him.

00:16:06.000 Yeah.

00:16:06.000 And he's like, get Kevin Hart.

00:16:08.000 And that was the story I wanted Kevin to tell because that, as a comic, you can kind of put your head around that.

00:16:15.000 And I've, and I've, and by the way, I did not do a good job of explaining it on Shannon's show because it's like, you know, I'm a fucking talk out of my ass.

00:16:23.000 But like every comic has had these like moments that skyrocket them, right?

00:16:28.000 These moments that pop.

00:16:29.000 And I went through it.

00:16:30.000 And I think you'll understand it now.

00:16:32.000 But for me, it was the machine story going viral.

00:16:35.000 For Bill Burr, it's the Philly rant.

00:16:37.000 With Bill, that Philly rant just put him in the next level.

00:16:40.000 Jim Jeffries, he gets punched in the head at the comedy seller or comedy store in London.

00:16:45.000 His manager happens to be a guy that knows the internet, Brett Vincent, posted on MySpace, goes viral.

00:16:50.000 Every comic that pops always has that.

00:16:53.000 Tom, as I was telling this to Tom, he goes, yeah, it was me, Netflix.

00:16:57.000 He was like, Tom got on Netflix.

00:16:58.000 I mean, I didn't even realize this.

00:17:00.000 Tom said it to me.

00:17:01.000 He got on Netflix when there were two comics on Netflix, Bill Burr and Tom Segura.

00:17:07.000 Bill puts his special out there, like, did you like Bill Burr?

00:17:10.000 You might like Tom Segura.

00:17:11.000 And Tom's like, if Comedy Central had bought my hour, I would have been fucked.

00:17:15.000 But instead, I sold it to this small streamer, Netflix.

00:17:18.000 And the only other one they had was Bill Burr.

00:17:20.000 And so as comics, I think sometimes, and you know how much I believe in luck, it's so it's easier to hear about someone's luck where you go, oh, that is crazy, that happenstance.

00:17:31.000 I mean, we've said it about you, and I know you probably disagree maybe to a certain extent, but I think the greatest thing that ever happened to you was that getting kicked out of the comedy store, that period of time where you had to re-evaluate your evaluate yourself and you created this, what you have.

00:17:49.000 And you re, I mean, you would speak to it better than I could, but I think as comics, we look at you reinventing yourself and reimagining yourself and making it your own fucking entity and creating this podcast, which has changed all of our lives.

00:18:04.000 That moment, and it must have been tough to lose your agent, get kicked out of the comedy store, and have to figure things out that we all got behind.

00:18:12.000 Everyone got behind you.

00:18:13.000 Everyone was like, that's my guy.

00:18:15.000 I mean, I'm curious what your feelings about that are.

00:18:18.000 Okay, if your New Year's resolution was change everything and be a new person, good luck.

00:18:23.000 So instead of pretending you're going to meal prep kale forever or do morning cold plunges, here's one actually realistic thing, AG1.

00:18:32.000 AG1 is a daily health drink that supports your energy, gut health, immune health, and helps fill common nutrient gaps.

00:18:39.000 Just one scoop in cold water each morning and you're off.

00:18:43.000 It's got over 75 vitamins, minerals, probiotics, and whole food ingredients in there.

00:18:48.000 So instead of guessing whether you need a probiotic or a prebiotic or sorting through 10 different bottles of pills and powders, you can just do one scoop and get on with your day.

00:18:58.000 It's great because it feels like the grown-up move, but for once, it's actually really easy.

00:19:02.000 It takes like 30 seconds and you'll notice a steadiness that sets you up for the day.

00:19:06.000 Not wired, not crashing, just functional human being energy.

00:19:11.000 I've partnered with AG1 for years.

00:19:13.000 And if you want to give it a try, head to drinkag1.com slash Joe Rogan.

00:19:18.000 You'll get the welcome kit, a bottle of vitamin D3 plus K2, and AG1 travel packs for free with your first subscription.

00:19:26.000 Just head to drinkag1.com slash Joe Rogan or visit the link in the description to get started.

00:19:33.000 I mean, that list certainly had an impact.

00:19:36.000 You know, it was also the Mencia video where people could clearly see that I was right.

00:19:41.000 Yes.

00:19:42.000 And then we were all a victim.

00:19:43.000 Like we were all hiding at the store.

00:19:45.000 Like when he would go on stage or he would be in the back of the room, if you were on stage, they would flash the light to let you know that he was in the room.

00:19:53.000 You know how crazy that is that there's a guy around that steals so much that they have to flash a light whenever a comic's on stage.

00:20:01.000 And then comics would just start doing crowd work.

00:20:04.000 Yeah, that's insane.

00:20:05.000 It was crazy.

00:20:07.000 So all the comics knew that what I was saying was the truth.

00:20:11.000 And it was proved by like the consequences of someone who was already successful, right?

00:20:16.000 So I was already on Fear Factor at the time.

00:20:18.000 I was already a known person.

00:20:20.000 And I lost my agent and I got kicked out of the store.

00:20:23.000 That video, that video was akin to the Philly rant.

00:20:28.000 Jim Jeffries getting that viral moment for you.

00:20:32.000 It was also how well Red Band put it together, too, because he's such a good editor.

00:20:36.000 He's so brilliant.

00:20:37.000 It was music.

00:20:38.000 He went back in time.

00:20:39.000 He like, you know, like he spent a lot of time working on that.

00:20:43.000 It was a work of art.

00:20:45.000 But it was, you know, it was the first time that someone was held accountable because, you know, we don't have to name names, but we all know people who snuck through and still kind of have careers, although greatly diminished impact.

00:20:59.000 Because like when they go on stage now, people are excited to see them because they're famous.

00:21:04.000 And then that immediately goes away when you realize there's nothing there.

00:21:07.000 They have no material because they have to write for themselves now.

00:21:11.000 You see a giant drop off.

00:21:11.000 Yeah.

00:21:14.000 You see the early specials with like great jokes and really funny.

00:21:18.000 And then you see like, what is this nonsense?

00:21:20.000 Towards the end, it's just like weird, fucking like nonsensical rant something.

00:21:27.000 It's bizarre to watch.

00:21:29.000 But that's what happens when you get exposed and you have to do your own shit.

00:21:32.000 And there's a few of those guys floating around out there.

00:21:35.000 Oh, yeah.

00:21:36.000 It's crazy because the one thing.

00:21:36.000 Oh, yeah.

00:21:40.000 I can't smoke cigars.

00:21:41.000 What happened?

00:21:41.000 Really?

00:21:42.000 Blood clot.

00:21:43.000 Oh, that's right.

00:21:44.000 Yeah.

00:21:45.000 I'm not supposed to smoke cigars.

00:21:46.000 I mean, I could text my cardiologist and see what he says.

00:21:49.000 I heard cigars are good for you.

00:21:51.000 I heard that cigar.

00:21:52.000 They gave them to Teddy Roosevelt.

00:21:54.000 Yeah.

00:21:54.000 Look what happened to him.

00:21:55.000 You know, I could have one cigar.

00:21:56.000 If you're going to smoke one in here, I mean, dog.

00:21:59.000 Come on, son.

00:22:00.000 Just do it like old school Rogan where anytime I smoked weed, you had to pull the camera away from me.

00:22:06.000 Because you're on the travel channel.

00:22:12.000 Yeah, I mean, we all have a moment where things, but it's like an accumulation of those moments, right?

00:22:19.000 You know what it is?

00:22:20.000 It's like you get that moment.

00:22:22.000 Like, I'll use Burr as an example because, you know, only because I've talked to him about this specifically.

00:22:28.000 But, like, he didn't love the Philly rant because right away everyone thought, oh, that's his thing.

00:22:32.000 We're going to, we're going to heckle him and he'll go lose his shit.

00:22:35.000 So he didn't love it.

00:22:36.000 But the thing is, that goes viral.

00:22:39.000 And then you Google that person.

00:22:41.000 You're like, who is this?

00:22:42.000 And then you see a body of work that's undeniable.

00:22:45.000 And you're like, oh, Bill Burr is my guy.

00:22:47.000 You know, for Shane, I mean, in my opinion, it's that YouTube special he did.

00:22:55.000 And then you see Gillian Keeves.

00:22:57.000 You see all his sketches.

00:22:58.000 It was also him getting kicked off.

00:23:00.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:23:01.000 Him getting kicked off Vestadel was huge.

00:23:03.000 Yeah.

00:23:03.000 It was the best thing that ever happened to him.

00:23:04.000 If he was on SNL, he would have got buried on that show like a lot of people.

00:23:09.000 But instead, he gets kicked off.

00:23:11.000 A bunch of people are mad at him.

00:23:12.000 And then they're like, well, what did he actually say?

00:23:14.000 And then people start looking into it and they go, oh, he was just fucking around.

00:23:17.000 He was pretending to be a racist guy in Chinatown.

00:23:21.000 That was the bit.

00:23:22.000 Like, he was just, they were just talking shit on a podcast.

00:23:26.000 And then he releases that special and you go, oh, he's actually a great comic.

00:23:30.000 He's like, dude, his special Olympics joke.

00:23:32.000 He's got so many good jokes.

00:23:33.000 His special Olympics jokes.

00:23:34.000 We were in the bus one time.

00:23:36.000 And my cousin Andrew goes, has anyone known Shane Gillis?

00:23:40.000 And I've known Shane for a while.

00:23:43.000 I have hysterical emails that he sent me back when he was like, just like over Micah or whatever.

00:23:49.000 Like going, like, hey, man, I feel like we connected.

00:23:49.000 Uh-huh.

00:23:52.000 They're the greatest, Joe.

00:23:56.000 If he knew that I was, he'd be, she'd face him and go, hey, can I read your emails on Joe?

00:24:01.000 He'd fucking lose his shit.

00:24:03.000 They're so fucking hysterical.

00:24:04.000 Joe, I'll send them to you.

00:24:05.000 And so I go, yeah, I love Shane.

00:24:07.000 I love Shane.

00:24:08.000 The day I met him, he goes, he's like, yeah, I'm supposed to go out with my girlfriend tonight.

00:24:12.000 And I was like, but it was like 10 in the morning.

00:24:14.000 We were drinking Fireball.

00:24:16.000 And he was like, 10 in the morning.

00:24:18.000 Yeah, we were doing a calling sick to work shows where we'd go to the club.

00:24:21.000 He was like, Fireball at 10 a.m.

00:24:23.000 He's like, that's what he said.

00:24:24.000 He's like, I'm supposed to go out with my girlfriend.

00:24:25.000 I said, what's your girlfriend's name?

00:24:26.000 And he goes, Big Tuna.

00:24:27.000 And I went, Big Tuna.

00:24:28.000 He goes, she's a big girl. 0.88

00:24:29.000 And I was like, yeah, I figured for the name, Shane.

00:24:31.000 And then I fucking, I've that from that day on.

00:24:33.000 But that special Olympic jokes, when he, we listened to it in the bus, he's like, what do you think?

00:24:39.000 Should we race them?

00:24:40.000 I mean, we were crying fucking laughing.

00:24:44.000 That's like one of my favorite jokes I've fucking ever.

00:24:46.000 He's got a lot of great bits, but that's special they did at the Creek in the Cave.

00:24:50.000 That was like, people got to see.

00:24:52.000 They're like, oh, okay.

00:24:53.000 Well, this is what he does.

00:24:55.000 He touches on that third wire.

00:24:57.000 You know, the third rail, rather.

00:24:57.000 Yeah.

00:24:59.000 And it's like, you know, it's funny.

00:25:01.000 It's really funny.

00:25:02.000 And they were trying to label him as this horrible racist that Saturday Night Live hired.

00:25:08.000 But, you know.

00:25:09.000 Anything but from my opinion.

00:25:11.000 But that happens, man.

00:25:13.000 You're going to, you know, you're going to get attacked.

00:25:17.000 There's always something.

00:25:18.000 There's always something that a comic says where someone's going to get mad, especially in this day and age.

00:25:22.000 People are just looking for things to get mad.

00:25:24.000 But almost always it helps them.

00:25:26.000 If they're a good comic, almost always.

00:25:29.000 Like Tony Hinchcliffe, it blew him up.

00:25:31.000 Like almost always when something happens, you get attacked.

00:25:34.000 People start looking at it and you go, actually, this guy's really funny.

00:25:37.000 And then they become a fan.

00:25:39.000 Yeah.

00:25:39.000 Because you're just getting so many more eyeballs.

00:25:41.000 The people that are looking to hate you, they're going to hate you no matter what.

00:25:44.000 But there's going to be a bunch of people that are all like, well, what's going on?

00:25:47.000 And then they look into it.

00:25:48.000 I mean, that happened to me during COVID.

00:25:50.000 I gained 2 million followers in like a month.

00:25:54.000 2 million followers on Spotify in a month when they were trying to pull me off of Spotify.

00:25:59.000 Who like all these music artists were calling me a vaccine denier and removing their podcast or removing their music?

00:26:08.000 Like when Neil Young and was it Joni Mitchell?

00:26:11.000 Yeah, Joni Mitchell, they publicly removed their music from Spotify because of my podcast.

00:26:19.000 Just make your back.

00:26:20.000 I don't know if Joni Mitchell is, but yeah, Neil Young is.

00:26:20.000 Yeah.

00:26:23.000 I don't even think Neil Young actually owned his music, which was funny.

00:26:26.000 I think it was just like a ploy.

00:26:28.000 I mean, it's like, I think he probably believed a lot of things he was saying.

00:26:32.000 He was just misinformed.

00:26:34.000 He just didn't understand that I was actually talking to people that were legitimate scientists that turned out they were right now.

00:26:42.000 Now we know.

00:26:43.000 But back then, it was like there was this hysteria about it.

00:26:46.000 And a lot of people that were very skeptical started tuning in.

00:26:50.000 And then the whole fucking CNN thing where they turned me green, like all that shit, just that helped. 0.71

00:26:55.000 I don't know if I could have.

00:26:57.000 I'm not good.

00:26:58.000 People always go, you know, if they're talking about you, it's good.

00:27:00.000 All press is good press.

00:27:02.000 But anytime anything negative comes out about me, it fucking devastates me.

00:27:06.000 I don't like, I could not have gone through what you went through.

00:27:09.000 You just don't, I just don't read it.

00:27:10.000 If you don't read it, you don't like when you find it.

00:27:12.000 Like, how do you, because like you come up in my newsfeed all the time.

00:27:15.000 Uh-huh.

00:27:16.000 And, and, like, and I, I'm, I'm such a fucking idiot that if I'm scrolling through Google News and I see my name, I go, oh, what's that?

00:27:24.000 And then I'm like, god damn it.

00:27:26.000 You can't do that.

00:27:27.000 Last time I did this show, greatest experience, great hang, lucky streaming number one on Netflix.

00:27:33.000 So fucking happy.

00:27:34.000 I'm in my bed going, things are going good for the big guy.

00:27:37.000 Hit on Google News and it's like picture of me and you.

00:27:40.000 It's like, Burt Chrysler, Joe Rogan.

00:27:41.000 Like Burke Chrysa ruins the Joe Rogan podcast.

00:27:44.000 I'm like, mother.

00:27:45.000 And it was an MMA fucking journalist.

00:27:47.000 And I was like, wait, why?

00:27:48.000 God damn it.

00:27:49.000 And I was like, oh, and then you see it and you're like, well, it can't be that bad.

00:27:52.000 I'm going to read it.

00:27:53.000 And they're like, oh, my God.

00:27:56.000 But then my daughter, Georgia, said something very profound to me.

00:28:00.000 She was like, why would you allow that?

00:28:02.000 And I'm sure that guy will write that same article after this episode.

00:28:06.000 I'm sure he will.

00:28:07.000 I think the guy also has a fucking football feed.

00:28:09.000 He said, I ruined the.

00:28:12.000 Anytime I do something, there's someone that says Burt Chrysa ruined it.

00:28:15.000 And I'm the only one that reads it.

00:28:17.000 And my daughter, Georgia, goes, literally looked at me and goes, did you have fun with Joe?

00:28:21.000 I went, yeah, I had a blast.

00:28:22.000 I love being around Joe.

00:28:23.000 She's like, then fuck it. 1.00

00:28:24.000 She goes, your experience is the one that matters the most.

00:28:27.000 She goes, why would you allow someone to dictate your memory of an event?

00:28:32.000 And I was like, who the fuck raised you?

00:28:35.000 I was like, I don't know.

00:28:37.000 Well, you were on the road.

00:28:38.000 She probably raised herself.

00:28:40.000 That's why she's so wise.

00:28:42.000 She had to form her own opinion.

00:28:43.000 She had to read books.

00:28:44.000 Yeah, she had to actually form her own opinions and think about things rationally, having a father like you.

00:28:50.000 You can't pay attention because the vast majority of people lived miserable lives.

00:28:54.000 That's the Rose quote.

00:28:56.000 Most men live lives of quiet desperation. 0.97

00:28:58.000 There's a lot of people out there that are very, very sad, very unhappy, and looking to make something negative.

00:29:05.000 They're always looking to be a critic, which is fine.

00:29:09.000 You know, that's their prerogative.

00:29:11.000 But it's not, you don't have to read it.

00:29:13.000 Well, I'm at the place now, like I took Google News, I took all Google and everything off my phone because the series premiered and I didn't want to get good or bad.

00:29:22.000 I was like, because you can't quantify the good.

00:29:26.000 Like, if you're going to listen to the good, you've got to listen to the bad.

00:29:31.000 And I was like, well, I don't want to hear the bad, so I just want to hear the good.

00:29:34.000 And then Jamie and I were talking about this outside, but like you have a social media team who's posting like, like, like, like your claps, like they're posting like the nice articles.

00:29:45.000 And I'm like, don't even post that.

00:29:46.000 Cause like, I don't even like, just stay out of it.

00:29:49.000 Just let people like it, let them like it.

00:29:50.000 And if they like it.

00:29:51.000 Let people have their own opinions.

00:29:52.000 That's the best move.

00:29:53.000 I don't have anybody that does that.

00:29:55.000 I don't have any of that.

00:29:56.000 Do you post all your own stuff on Instagram?

00:29:57.000 On Instagram, if I post it, it's from me.

00:30:00.000 Really?

00:30:00.000 Yeah, always.

00:30:01.000 Yeah.

00:30:02.000 And then there's the Joe Rogan experience page that the staff does, but that is just a clip from the podcast.

00:30:08.000 They take an interesting clip where someone says something.

00:30:10.000 It's put up with no context.

00:30:12.000 It just says, you know, episode, blah, blah, blah.

00:30:15.000 That's it.

00:30:16.000 I try to do it as like natural and neutral.

00:30:19.000 You like it.

00:30:19.000 You don't like it.

00:30:20.000 If you don't like it, don't listen to the next one.

00:30:22.000 It's okay.

00:30:23.000 So what is the impetus for you to post something?

00:30:28.000 At what point do you decide to share your life?

00:30:31.000 Well, I just feel like if there's something I think someone will think is interesting or something that I would like to see, if someone puts it on their feed, I'll put it in there every now.

00:30:41.000 But I don't post that much.

00:30:42.000 Because I don't read that much.

00:30:42.000 You don't?

00:30:43.000 I stay off.

00:30:44.000 I don't think it's good for you.

00:30:46.000 I think it's not only do I not think it's good for you.

00:30:48.000 I think it's genuinely bad for you.

00:30:50.000 And it gets in the way of all the other stuff that I like to do.

00:30:54.000 You know, I'm busy, man.

00:30:56.000 I'm busy.

00:30:57.000 There's a lot of interesting shit to pay attention to in the world.

00:30:59.000 I'm not one of those things.

00:31:01.000 I don't like paying attention to me, you know, and reading me.

00:31:05.000 And I don't want to go online and see too many car crashes and people getting shot and animal attacks.

00:31:11.000 Tommy and I have the worst fucking text message chain.

00:31:15.000 Him and I, all day, whenever he finds something like unbelievably horrific, some guy getting run over by a truck, he'll just send it to me.

00:31:22.000 And then I'll send it to him.

00:31:23.000 And we're always trying to one-up each other.

00:31:25.000 So when I find something absolutely horrible, someone says me something absolutely horrible, I send it to him.

00:31:30.000 And then we just, that's like my main source of like trauma online is my Tom Segora text message chain.

00:31:38.000 But other than that, I pretty much stay off.

00:31:41.000 I don't think it's good for you.

00:31:43.000 And I feel way better.

00:31:44.000 I started doing it a few months ago.

00:31:46.000 It's like a force of habit.

00:31:48.000 Like I'm looking at it all the time.

00:31:50.000 Let me just not look at it today.

00:31:52.000 And then I did it another day and another day.

00:31:53.000 I'm like, God, I feel better.

00:31:55.000 Like, I genuinely feel better.

00:31:55.000 I feel better.

00:31:57.000 It's like I'm getting over a cold or something like that.

00:32:00.000 And so I said, all right, well, obviously, like, engage.

00:32:03.000 Definitely don't read anything.

00:32:05.000 Like, definitely don't like read when people say things about you.

00:32:09.000 Definitely don't read when you post something, read the comments.

00:32:12.000 Don't do any of that.

00:32:14.000 You know, people get wrapped up in it and you realize like people are just trying to take you down.

00:32:18.000 There's so, I mean, not all of them.

00:32:20.000 A lot of people are supporting you.

00:32:21.000 But it doesn't matter if there's like 10 people that love you and one person that hates you.

00:32:25.000 You're going to think about that one person, you know, which is nuts.

00:32:28.000 But it's just human nature.

00:32:29.000 It's crazy how that algorithm works is that it's just like if there's someone in the front row that's not laughing.

00:32:35.000 Like last night I had a I don't know, it was at the bottom of the barrel and I don't know how rape came up, but it always does.

00:32:42.000 And I was like, well, there's no phones in here.

00:32:44.000 Let's go.

00:32:45.000 I said, if I'm going to go for it, it's in this room.

00:32:47.000 Right.

00:32:48.000 And there was a woman that did not like it.

00:32:50.000 And she was a little vocal in the crowd.

00:32:52.000 You know, the bouncer was like, yo, you know, let him, you know, he's working this out or whatever.

00:32:57.000 And then she's like, I was told you shut up.

00:32:58.000 And then the rest of the night, I'm watching her out of the corner of my eye going, God damn it.

00:33:04.000 And then I just dug holes and holes and holes.

00:33:06.000 And then at one point, the whole audience is chanting rape.

00:33:09.000 And I'm like, oh, my God, this is bad.

00:33:13.000 But it's funny.

00:33:15.000 And then also, it's like, listen, say you're some fucking dude looking for a connection in life.

00:33:19.000 And you go to my page and you leave a hundred comments.

00:33:23.000 And they're like, you're the best, Bert.

00:33:24.000 When you come to Cincinnati, I'm going to be here.

00:33:24.000 I love you.

00:33:26.000 Tampa, I'll be there, man.

00:33:28.000 I'm going to drive.

00:33:29.000 And then the one time he's like, you're a fucking bitch. 1.00

00:33:31.000 He's like, oh, I guess that's how I get the cat to come outside.

00:33:31.000 And then I reply.

00:33:34.000 You know?

00:33:35.000 So that's why I don't read.

00:33:36.000 I don't need any comments.

00:33:38.000 Whitney was going into, you know, the Whitney thing about Miss Rachel.

00:33:41.000 I didn't know who Miss Rachel is. 0.86

00:33:42.000 I found out who she is today.

00:33:44.000 1.8 billion views on how to say mom and dad.

00:33:49.000 And I was like, it makes sense, man.

00:33:52.000 Well, she's an educator for neurodivergent kids.

00:33:57.000 Is that what it is?

00:33:58.000 Yeah, I watched a couple of videos.

00:34:01.000 Pull up some videos of Miss Rachel.

00:34:03.000 Because after people were drafted, by the way, the worst fucking people were going after her. 1.00

00:34:09.000 People that I know that are comedians that are just unbelievably shitty, dishonest, disingenuous human beings, bad faith communicators, people that just like completely distort anything about the person.

00:34:23.000 And it's just because she's successful.

00:34:26.000 It's a giant part of it.

00:34:27.000 And so they see her making some crack about Miss Rachel because she was watching it with her kid.

00:34:32.000 She didn't know what the fuck it is.

00:34:33.000 So here's Miss Rachel. 0.58

00:34:35.000 Let me hear what this sounds like.

00:34:36.000 Letters and two really special guests.

00:34:40.000 No.

00:34:43.000 No, not at all.

00:34:44.000 Dinosaur.

00:34:46.000 I don't hear anything in my own microphone.

00:34:47.000 Can you help me count that?

00:34:49.000 Do you hear it?

00:34:51.000 I don't hear you, Bert.

00:34:52.000 There we go.

00:34:53.000 There we go.

00:34:54.000 Two, three, four.

00:34:58.000 Four must be the number of the day.

00:35:03.000 The dinosaur eggs are hatching.

00:35:07.000 Wow.

00:35:07.000 How many dinosaurs do we have?

00:35:11.000 One, two, three, four.

00:35:16.000 Okay, pause.

00:35:17.000 Why would you go after this?

00:35:19.000 Like, this is like a little kid show.

00:35:21.000 Like, she must have been bored.

00:35:22.000 There's nothing different from this blues clues, in my opinion.

00:35:25.000 It's it's a show for little kids.

00:35:27.000 Like, I don't get it.

00:35:27.000 Yeah.

00:35:28.000 I don't know.

00:35:29.000 Maybe she was just bored.

00:35:30.000 She was trying to write a joke and thought she'd get some traction, I guess.

00:35:33.000 Maybe she took two instead of one. 0.98

00:35:36.000 And then she got a little extra energy.

00:35:38.000 She took two little one.

00:35:40.000 I don't know what she's doing.

00:35:43.000 All of a sudden, she's like, fuck Miss Rachel. 1.00

00:35:45.000 She took two.

00:35:46.000 But then she started responding to people because she didn't understand what it was.

00:35:49.000 She said, and then she took it down and apologized. 0.99

00:35:51.000 But you can't apologize to the mob.

00:35:54.000 They come to you.

00:35:55.000 They come for you.

00:35:56.000 And she learned.

00:35:56.000 And I texted her.

00:35:57.000 I said, listen, I love you to death.

00:35:59.000 You got to stop going back and forth to these people.

00:36:00.000 You can't do that.

00:36:01.000 It's not.

00:36:02.000 They don't.

00:36:02.000 This is not a genuine conversation.

00:36:04.000 They don't care.

00:36:06.000 Like, if you were a person and you were someone's friend and you started shitting on Miss Rachel and someone said, actually, that's like for kids with learning disorders.

00:36:14.000 And you'd be like, oh, fuck.

00:36:16.000 I didn't know.

00:36:17.000 And that would be the end of it.

00:36:19.000 And then we'd laugh.

00:36:20.000 But these people are not looking for a real conversation.

00:36:23.000 They're just looking to destroy your life.

00:36:26.000 And then so many people like, she lost her career, career's over.

00:36:29.000 Like, what?

00:36:29.000 But you weren't going to see her anyway, you fucking cunt.

00:36:33.000 Like, what are you talking about?

00:36:34.000 You weren't going to pay to see her anyway.

00:36:36.000 Stop saying her career's over.

00:36:39.000 It's not doing a damn thing to her career.

00:36:41.000 You just want it to be over because you live a miserable fucking life, which is why you're on threads 12 hours a day.

00:36:49.000 So funny you say that.

00:36:50.000 I just read something negative about Whitney on Threads today.

00:36:52.000 I was like, what does she do?

00:36:54.000 Bro, Threads is the worst.

00:36:55.000 And then I saw the Miss Rachel shit and I watched the video. 1.00

00:36:58.000 I had two kids.

00:36:59.000 I don't know.

00:37:00.000 I look at that as I go, that's nice.

00:37:02.000 Threads is like for people who are already been like humiliated on Twitter and they're trying to find a new crowd.

00:37:07.000 It's very weird.

00:37:09.000 Very, very, like, so much negativity.

00:37:12.000 Not that Twitter isn't.

00:37:13.000 Like, Twitter's super negative, too.

00:37:14.000 I haven't been on X.

00:37:15.000 I try to look at the news only.

00:37:17.000 I try to look at news and things that people are exposing that's in the news, which is very interesting.

00:37:23.000 Speaking of which, what was that thing that you found?

00:37:26.000 So this is very strange.

00:37:28.000 This is about people being able to communicate in lucid dreaming.

00:37:31.000 True, I guess.

00:37:32.000 We'll find out later.

00:37:34.000 Scientists report first ever communication between two humans during sleep.

00:37:38.000 I'd love this.

00:37:39.000 Scientists say that science fiction may be coming closer to reality.

00:37:42.000 According to reports, California startup claims it successfully enabled two-way communication between people while they were lucid dreaming.

00:37:50.000 Participants were asleep in separate locations while researchers monitored their sleep and transmitted a coded word designed to be perceived inside a dream without waking them.

00:38:00.000 The system reportedly relied on sensors, wireless communication, and specialized software to detect dream states and relay the message.

00:38:08.000 The company's founder says that what once sounded like science fiction could soon become a daily life, a part of daily life.

00:38:15.000 No independent scientists, but they're not saying what happened.

00:38:18.000 No independent scientific replication has confirmed the results yet.

00:38:21.000 Still, the experiment builds on real research showing that interaction between lucid dreams is possible.

00:38:26.000 Yeah, but what is the interaction?

00:38:27.000 The coded word, I guess, was it.

00:38:29.000 Did they relay the coded word to each other?

00:38:31.000 They both got the coded word.

00:38:32.000 That's where it started getting into WordSpace that I found out.

00:38:35.000 So this was posted on Instagram like yesterday or something.

00:38:39.000 I googled it.

00:38:40.000 Press release was from 2024.

00:38:44.000 Breakthrough from REM space, first ever communication between people in dreams.

00:38:48.000 So this is the article about it in Business Wire.

00:38:51.000 Lucid dreams occur, blah, blah, blah.

00:38:54.000 Participants are sleeping in their homes.

00:38:56.000 Brainwaves and other polysomnographic data were tracked remotely.

00:39:02.000 Specially designed, developed apparatus.

00:39:05.000 When the server detected the first participant entered a lucid dream, it generated a how do they detect that someone's in a lucid dream?

00:39:12.000 Because a lucid dream is a dream where you're aware that you're dreaming.

00:39:14.000 Yes.

00:39:15.000 It generated a random Remyo word and sent it to him via earbuds, earbuds.

00:39:21.000 Participant repeated the word in his dream with his response captured and stored on the server.

00:39:27.000 What?

00:39:28.000 Eight minutes later, the next participant entered a lucid dream.

00:39:33.000 Received the stored message from the first participant and confirmed it upon awakening.

00:39:39.000 Huh so no, it's not.

00:39:43.000 It sounds like it sounds like they're saying it in the room and the person's grabbing it.

00:39:47.000 No it's, they're sending it through earbuds.

00:39:49.000 Yeah, they were both in their own houses.

00:39:51.000 It said at the time, yeah, so they receive it through earbuds.

00:39:54.000 He says it in the dream and then she receives it.

00:39:59.000 Huh well, you got to wonder what is happening in dreams.

00:40:03.000 Dreams are very bizarre.

00:40:04.000 Have you ever lucid dreamed?

00:40:05.000 Yeah yeah, not.

00:40:07.000 I mean, i've done it a couple of times, but I haven't on purpose, and i've always wondered why not like, why haven't I read books on lucid dreams?

00:40:14.000 Why haven't I tried to do it?

00:40:16.000 I think it's something that just happens.

00:40:18.000 No, you could actually do it, you could.

00:40:20.000 There's, there's guys that practice lucid dreaming.

00:40:22.000 I mean, I lucid dream pretty extensively.

00:40:24.000 Yeah, like i've ever since.

00:40:27.000 When I remember, when you came out with Alpha Brain, you're one of the first things you said it would help with lucid dreaming.

00:40:32.000 Oh, if you take it before bed, it definitely helps with lucid dreaming.

00:40:35.000 Yeah, and I remember saying I didn't know what lucid dreaming was at the time, and then I found out I was lucid dreaming and i've i've lucid dreamed, i've my my whole life.

00:40:45.000 But now that, once I knew what it was, I could stay in a dream and decide, and I could go back into dreams, I could restart a dream that I just had, go back to sleep and go back really, yeah.

00:40:54.000 Yeah, it sounds crazy and I know it sounds like horseshit, but I never knew what it was.

00:40:58.000 I never knew what it was until alpha brain.

00:41:00.000 There's actual techniques that people practice and apparently they give classes and courses on how to do lucid books written on it.

00:41:08.000 But there's.

00:41:08.000 There's real techniques on how to lucid dream.

00:41:11.000 I just never I don't know why like I, when i'm tired, I just want to go to sleep.

00:41:16.000 I go hard all day yeah, and when I crash, I just crash.

00:41:20.000 I don't want to be fucking around experimenting while i'm sleeping, I just want to go to sleep.

00:41:24.000 My lucid dreams primarily are either like i'm I I realize i'm dreaming, I go, i'm asleep, i'm dreaming, this isn't real oh, i'm in control.

00:41:33.000 And then, and then a lot of times it has to do with fucking.

00:41:36.000 Like i'm like oh, I don't have to put a condom on.

00:41:40.000 This is great, this.

00:41:41.000 I can't bang all these fucking chicks in this room. 1.00

00:41:43.000 And then one time I had a lucid dream where I was like I could.

00:41:47.000 I was.

00:41:47.000 I knew I was dreaming.

00:41:48.000 I was outside, I had to go up these steps into like an old cottage, like one of those old Hollywood cottages, and I was like I gotta fuck, I gotta have sex with anyone I want.

00:41:56.000 And in my dream I was like oh, pick your wife, how cool is that?

00:42:00.000 And then I went to this cottage.

00:42:01.000 I know I fucked my wife, I know I could have fucked her in real life and then. 0.96

00:42:05.000 But a lot of my dreams back in the day when we, when I first started lucid dreaming, I would always decide to fly.

00:42:11.000 And I remember I remember I had one right after we wrote the first time I ever tried alpha brain.

00:42:16.000 I had one and I and it was I was doing a photo shoot on Melrose and I was like I don't want to be here.

00:42:24.000 And then I was like wait, i'm dreaming, this isn't real.

00:42:26.000 I was like i'm gonna fly home.

00:42:28.000 And so I just leapt up in the air, started flying over Hollywood and then over the hills, and then I was like wait, I have no idea, I have no frame of reference for where I am.

00:42:35.000 I was like it's getting dark and I was like where's the 101?

00:42:38.000 And then in the dream I was just started kept flying and then i'll wake up shortly thereafter but it's a lot of like a lot, lot of sex and a lot of flying.

00:42:49.000 A lot of people breathe underwater in their dreams.

00:42:51.000 I never breathe underwater.

00:42:52.000 Yeah, they breathe underwater in their dreams.

00:42:54.000 They fly.

00:42:55.000 Flying is like really common.

00:42:57.000 I used to have like crazy fucking dreams, like wild.

00:43:00.000 I sold a TV show to Comedy Central about my dreams.

00:43:03.000 Like I've had dreams where I wake up laughing.

00:43:05.000 I've had dreams where I wake up crying, like I've.

00:43:07.000 I have such insane fucking dreams but and I no one ever wants to, I no one ever wants to hear you I would have dream joke dreams like real joke dreams.

00:43:17.000 Like I had a dream this is a real dream I had where I was on stage and I was in a dance position like this and I know this sounds horse shit is a real dream and and the curtains drawn and I look around and I see I'm standing on stage with four or five dudes that are all in clan outfits and I'm like, oh fuck.

00:43:38.000 And I look down and I realize I'm in a clan outfit and I'm like motherfucker, and I'm like I gotta get off stage and the curtains draw back and I hear and it's an all black people and I hear the voice, the voice Of God. 1.00

00:43:50.000 Go, ladies and gentlemen, put your hands together for the click clack clan. 1.00

00:43:55.000 And we started tap dancing and we were so good that the black people got to their feet and they started cheering and we're like, oh my god.

00:44:01.000 And so yeah, that was and that was a real dream.

00:44:04.000 I woke up and I wrote it down.

00:44:05.000 I used to write down all my dreams, voice text them.

00:44:07.000 I used to voice text them all.

00:44:08.000 I'd have dreams about you and, and Stanhope and Roe and Uh, and Joey Diaz, like I did.

00:44:14.000 It was like my whole world.

00:44:15.000 I used to think to myself like I had a dream about Shaq the other day. 0.99

00:44:19.000 I was like I wonder if Shaq ever dreams about me. 0.80

00:44:21.000 I bet he doesn't.

00:44:22.000 I bet he doesn't.

00:44:25.000 Who's the who's the who's someone you've had a dream about recently.

00:44:29.000 I don't really have dreams too many dreams about people, not people that I know.

00:44:33.000 What are your dreams about?

00:44:34.000 My dreams are weird man, like let's dig into this.

00:44:37.000 I had a dream that I came on the podcast I had to talk about because it was the absolute strangest, most realistic dream of my life, and it was a dream where I encountered these beings that were not human, and it was insanely realistic.

00:44:54.000 They were very human, like I think there was four of them.

00:44:58.000 They were tall and thin and they look kind of.

00:45:02.000 They didn't look human.

00:45:03.000 Their heads were too big, their eyes are too big and I can't remember.

00:45:07.000 I think they had teeth. 0.96

00:45:08.000 I don't remember, but I remember they were joking with me, like they scared me, and they were like ah, like trying to get me comfortable with who they are, and they were communicating with me somehow or another through thoughts, and I was really freaked out because they seemed very, very real.

00:45:29.000 They didn't seem like any other dream that I had, so much so that I woke up at like 3, 30 in the morning and I just lay in bed for an hour trying to go back to sleep, and I couldn't go back to sleep.

00:45:40.000 I was almost like I'm not sleep, I'm wide awake, yeah.

00:45:42.000 And so I went to the gym and I just worked out at four in the morning and it worked out for like two hours and after it was over.

00:45:50.000 I got in the sauna, did the whole thing, and then I came to work.

00:45:53.000 I was like I have to talk about this right away because it was so strange.

00:45:57.000 It was one of the only dreams that I've ever had that did not feel at all like a dream.

00:46:02.000 It felt like I was encountering someone or something that was trying to get me comfortable with the idea of encountering them.

00:46:12.000 It wasn't like a dream.

00:46:14.000 It was, I was in the corridor of something that seemed like it was, it was not like it was from here.

00:46:25.000 It was like from somewhere else, but it was almost like it was very oddly lit.

00:46:30.000 Like the walls were lit in a very strange way, but it was almost like it was, it was this corridor, but it had a feeling almost like it was organic, like it was alive, like it was a living thing.

00:46:40.000 It was very fucking strange.

00:46:42.000 What if, what if that was, but what if that is something that you did, in fact, experience that was taken out of your memory, and then it's stuck in your memory and you're dreaming about it?

00:46:53.000 I mean, you could maybe all day long, right?

00:46:53.000 I don't know.

00:46:56.000 And so my feeling was that I had, and this is, again, it clearly was, I was dreaming, right?

00:47:05.000 So it clearly could have been just a dream.

00:47:07.000 But what it felt like was that it was an actual encounter with intelligence that wasn't human.

00:47:14.000 That's what it felt like.

00:47:16.000 And it felt like these things were not, they were not us.

00:47:21.000 And maybe they were what a human will be someday because they were human-like, but they were very slender.

00:47:28.000 They were very thin.

00:47:30.000 And they were wearing these suits that were like almost like rash guards, like what surfers wear, but a strange fabric.

00:47:39.000 Like it looked weird.

00:47:40.000 And it was the color of their skin, but it was clear that they were wearing something.

00:47:44.000 It didn't appear that they had any genitals.

00:47:46.000 They had no muscle tone at all.

00:47:48.000 They were just thin.

00:47:50.000 And they were communicating with me and looking at me.

00:47:53.000 And they were close, like where you are right now.

00:47:55.000 And I think, like I said, I think there was at least three of them.

00:47:58.000 I think there was four of them.

00:47:59.000 But I remember there was one that was going like joking around with me, like trying to scare me.

00:48:08.000 And it felt to me after they did it like, relax.

00:48:12.000 Like, this is okay.

00:48:13.000 Like, don't be freaked out.

00:48:15.000 Whatever this is, don't be freaked out.

00:48:17.000 And then I woke up.

00:48:18.000 And when I woke, and then there was also this weird reptilian element of it.

00:48:21.000 There was like a barrier.

00:48:22.000 They had a barrier and they were feeding like with, they were like pouring food to these things that almost like was letting me know the protection between you and this horrific danger that's out there in the world, in the universe, in life, is very, it's very thin.

00:48:43.000 There's very thin protection.

00:48:44.000 There's not much protection.

00:48:45.000 It was just like a barrier, like a simple barrier, like a, you know, like a fucking blockade they put to keep a crowd from passing through an area to let you know you're not supposed to go here.

00:48:57.000 It's crazy.

00:48:58.000 It's crazy how much you still.

00:49:00.000 How long ago did you have this dream?

00:49:01.000 A few months ago.

00:49:02.000 But isn't it so wild that something that didn't happen can be locked in your memory and then you just you're like, God, it affects you almost like it did.

00:49:11.000 Well, now it's like a memory of my recollection of the memory, which is odd, which is memories in general, which is why people distort memories and change them and make, you know, make the past something that's not real.

00:49:23.000 You know, you've talked to people that, yeah.

00:49:26.000 Yeah, we all do it.

00:49:26.000 Yeah.

00:49:27.000 I do it on podcasts.

00:49:28.000 Yeah, everybody does it.

00:49:30.000 But this was different.

00:49:31.000 This, whatever this dream was, I mean, look, there's a lot of confusion about what happens during sleep.

00:49:40.000 You know, we don't exactly know why you have dreams and what it's all, what's the function of it, what's the purpose of it.

00:49:47.000 But this one was different.

00:49:49.000 It was much more realistic than any dream I had ever experienced before.

00:49:54.000 Like the interaction between me and these creatures, these beings, was very different than anything I'd ever experienced in a dream.

00:50:04.000 The point, like, I felt it physically.

00:50:08.000 I can sleep on a bag of rocks.

00:50:08.000 And I woke up.

00:50:11.000 I can just go to sleep, dude.

00:50:14.000 It drives my wife crazy because she struggles to sleep. 1.00

00:50:17.000 And if we got on a plane, I just, I just cock out because I'm always going.

00:50:21.000 So, like, when it's time, when it's downtime, I don't have a problem sleeping, dog.

00:50:26.000 I sleep on a roof.

00:50:26.000 I can go to sleep.

00:50:28.000 I can sleep.

00:50:29.000 I couldn't go back to sleep, which is really weird for me.

00:50:32.000 I mean, I was wide awake at four in the morning, you know?

00:50:37.000 And I'm like, okay, I'm going to the gym.

00:50:40.000 Because I laid in bed for a whole hour trying to go back to sleep.

00:50:43.000 Saying, it's just a dream.

00:50:44.000 Just go to sleep.

00:50:45.000 I'm like, dude, just get up.

00:50:46.000 You're not going to sleep.

00:50:47.000 And I'm like, all right, well, I'm up.

00:50:49.000 I'll just go work out.

00:50:50.000 Like, maybe that'll help me go to sleep.

00:50:52.000 Nope.

00:50:53.000 I was wide awake, wide awake.

00:50:55.000 I wasn't even, most of the time when I'm working out, I'm either watching music or watching fights on TV.

00:51:00.000 I didn't even do that.

00:51:01.000 I was just by myself in silence trying to make sense of it.

00:51:05.000 Just doing chin-ups and dips and trying to make sense of whatever the fuck that was.

00:51:10.000 Because it just didn't seem like a dream.

00:51:12.000 It felt so real.

00:51:14.000 It felt so real.

00:51:16.000 And when I've talked to like my UFO friends, like Jesse Michaels, who's like really into UFOs, he's like, I think you had a real encounter.

00:51:23.000 I'm like, I don't know.

00:51:25.000 You know, I don't know what it was, but it certainly felt like a real encounter, whatever it was.

00:51:29.000 Do you listen to anything while you sleep or you sleep in the silence?

00:51:32.000 Oh, I listen to podcasts.

00:51:32.000 So I'll have dreams.

00:51:33.000 While you're sleeping?

00:51:34.000 Always.

00:51:35.000 Always.

00:51:35.000 That's so ridiculous.

00:51:36.000 I listen to.

00:51:36.000 That's so unhealthy.

00:51:37.000 I listened to a podcast about Rasputin last night.

00:51:40.000 Do you ever see his dick?

00:51:41.000 They have his dick pickled in a jar.

00:51:43.000 Are you serious?

00:51:44.000 Dude, he was the one who was.

00:51:46.000 You know, he was just fingering chicks. 1.00

00:51:47.000 Are you sure?

00:51:48.000 I don't know.

00:51:49.000 I think he was fucking.

00:51:50.000 It's not in the giant hog like that.

00:51:51.000 I think he's putting it to use.

00:51:52.000 Find Rasputin's hog.

00:51:54.000 But he was, that's what he did.

00:51:56.000 I would love to see his dick. 0.78

00:51:57.000 You'll see it.

00:51:58.000 That's my God.

00:51:59.000 Look at the size of that hog. 0.99

00:52:01.000 By the way, that's limp and dead.

00:52:04.000 Imagine what that thing looked like when it was hard.

00:52:06.000 Look at that look on that guy's face.

00:52:08.000 Look at the size of this cook. 0.83

00:52:10.000 Look at this cook. 0.99

00:52:11.000 Big old fucking pickled.

00:52:13.000 That's a big dick.

00:52:15.000 I mean, like, again, this is like a dead man's dick.

00:52:19.000 So there's no blood in it at all.

00:52:21.000 Imagine what that thing was like hard.

00:52:23.000 Big old Russian dick. 1.00

00:52:26.000 Big old axe handle.

00:52:27.000 Thank God that wasn't my dream.

00:52:29.000 So he was, you know, he was like, what does it say?

00:52:32.000 Rasputin's alleged genitals were sold in 2000 for $8,000.

00:52:37.000 Still surrounded by mystery with some experts believing it might actually belong to a bull.

00:52:41.000 Shut up. 0.95

00:52:42.000 They had a hard time killing him.

00:52:44.000 Yeah, they tried to poison him, right?

00:52:46.000 And they shoot him at the end and then throw him in the fucking river.

00:52:48.000 Well, Russians are different white people. 0.97

00:52:51.000 Ah, that's the joke I missed last night.

00:52:53.000 There was in the bottom of the barrel.

00:52:53.000 What?

00:52:54.000 They were like Trump versus Putin.

00:52:57.000 And I was like, and I was thinking about Rasputin, but I was thinking, but I was like, Russians are hard to kill. 1.00

00:53:02.000 And then I just went on to fucking talk about it.

00:53:05.000 What was this thing?

00:53:06.000 He was like a spiritual advisor.

00:53:09.000 Joe, that's a great talk.

00:53:10.000 I'll tell you everything you knew.

00:53:11.000 Yeah, he was a self-described holy man.

00:53:14.000 He was from 1869 to 1966.

00:53:17.000 He was from Siberia.

00:53:18.000 So he gained significant influence with Tsar Nicholas II after 1905, rapidly earning the trust of both Nicholas himself and his wife, Alexandra.

00:53:26.000 He became a healer, in quotes, for their hemophiliac son, Alexi.

00:53:31.000 What was happening was Alexi was getting given aspirin by the doctors.

00:53:35.000 And Rasputin came in and was like, yo, get the doctors away from him.

00:53:39.000 And he was a hemophiliac.

00:53:40.000 He had internal bleeding.

00:53:41.000 And when they removed the aspirin, which is a blood thinner, the kid started to heal.

00:53:45.000 And so the Tsarina said he's magic.

00:53:49.000 Even like at one point the kid was going to die and he wrote a letter and he said, your kid's going to be fine.

00:53:55.000 I had a dream about it, but get the doctors out of there. 0.85

00:53:57.000 And the doctors were always giving him aspirin and that was what was injuring the kid.

00:54:02.000 All the royalty at that time were hemophiliacs.

00:54:04.000 What?

00:54:05.000 Yeah, because of the inbreeding.

00:54:06.000 That's why they didn't have chins. 0.87

00:54:08.000 They had long noses and they were all hemophiliacs.

00:54:10.000 Oh, God.

00:54:11.000 And so, but what's crazy is the Russian. 0.99

00:54:15.000 So she loved Rosputin and would write letters to Rosputin that kind of sound a little sketchy.

00:54:20.000 But then all of Russia started thinking this healer has an end to the czar and the tsarina.

00:54:27.000 So all of a sudden, this healer's running the country. 1.00

00:54:30.000 What they didn't know, they couldn't tell anyone.

00:54:32.000 No, our kid's a fucking hemophiliac.

00:54:34.000 They couldn't tell anyone that because then they looked weak.

00:54:37.000 And so in a weird way, Rosputin got kind of thrown to the wolves because they couldn't tell him why they needed him.

00:54:44.000 That she wasn't fucking him.

00:54:46.000 That their marriage was intact.

00:54:48.000 How do you know she wasn't fucking him with that big old giant dick? 1.00

00:54:50.000 That guy was laying pipe.

00:54:52.000 He might have been.

00:54:52.000 She wrote a letter that says, like, kiss your, like, she wrote a letter and translation was like, kiss your cheek gently.

00:54:58.000 Oh, yeah.

00:54:59.000 Some shit.

00:54:59.000 Yeah.

00:55:00.000 He fucked her. 0.94

00:55:01.000 It was Catherine the Great that fucked a horse. 1.00

00:55:03.000 I heard about that.

00:55:04.000 Didn't she die fucking a horse? 1.00

00:55:04.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:55:06.000 I think so.

00:55:06.000 I went to that barn.

00:55:08.000 When I was in Russia, we went to that barn.

00:55:10.000 If you inbreed multiple generations in a row and then give them ultimate power, they're going to start fucking horses. 0.99

00:55:18.000 I mean, what kind of life is that?

00:55:20.000 What kind of weird world is that?

00:55:22.000 You're born royal?

00:55:23.000 It's insane.

00:55:24.000 You know what I'm watching again?

00:55:25.000 What?

00:55:26.000 Game of Thrones.

00:55:27.000 Started it all from the beginning.

00:55:29.000 Are you serious?

00:55:29.000 It's fucking amazing.

00:55:30.000 We're on season two now.

00:55:31.000 You wait, your family?

00:55:32.000 Yeah.

00:55:33.000 Me and my wife.

00:55:34.000 It's so good, dude.

00:55:35.000 We did it with the girls on vacation.

00:55:37.000 Bro, whoever that dude is that played Joffrey, that guy should get all the awards.

00:55:42.000 He's so good.

00:55:43.000 His transition from being like a shitty kid to an evil king is fucking amazing.

00:55:51.000 The way he plays Joffrey is fucking incredible.

00:55:55.000 I forgot how good that show is.

00:55:57.000 It's one of the greatest shows of all time.

00:56:00.000 But you'll never see it so good.

00:56:01.000 You'll never see him as anything other than Joffrey.

00:56:04.000 Yeah, that's a problem for a lot of people that have like significant, like Kramer.

00:56:04.000 That's a problem.

00:56:10.000 Two things.

00:56:11.000 A couple things.

00:56:12.000 This is the other thing.

00:56:13.000 Do you know he wrote a book and didn't mention that in the book?

00:56:15.000 Really?

00:56:16.000 That's interesting.

00:56:16.000 Yeah.

00:56:17.000 Yeah, somebody read the book.

00:56:18.000 One of the comics read the book.

00:56:19.000 He's like, I'm waiting for that to come up because he never fucking brings it up.

00:56:23.000 What's the title?

00:56:24.000 A tell-all book, except for one thing.

00:56:27.000 Except for the fucking biggest thing that's ever happened.

00:56:29.000 The biggest thing that ever happened to me.

00:56:30.000 Not only that, it was the first cancellation, the first public cancellation.

00:56:35.000 Was that really the first cancellation?

00:56:36.000 Oh, yeah, through viral video.

00:56:38.000 The first public cancellation through viral video.

00:56:41.000 Because I remember that night because I think I was at the improv and then I came over to remember that night.

00:56:49.000 And Brett Ernst was at the store.

00:56:52.000 He had just come over from the laugh factory.

00:56:54.000 He goes, bro.

00:56:55.000 He goes, I was just a laugh actor.

00:56:57.000 He goes, Kramer was off the rails.

00:56:59.000 He goes, he went nuts.

00:57:00.000 He got heckled.

00:57:01.000 He started yelling the N-word at these fucking people in the audience.

00:57:04.000 I go, no.

00:57:05.000 He goes, dude, it was fucking crazy.

00:57:07.000 He goes, he was bombing and they were heckling him.

00:57:09.000 And then he starts dropping N-bombs.

00:57:11.000 I'm like, no way.

00:57:12.000 He goes, yeah, I don't know what the fuck he was on.

00:57:15.000 But he did a set at the store.

00:57:17.000 He seemed a little speedy, a little, you know, a little elevated.

00:57:22.000 And then left the store, bombed at the store, and went over to the laugh factory.

00:57:26.000 And that was that night.

00:57:28.000 He was at the improv the weekend before.

00:57:30.000 And I was there.

00:57:31.000 And he was doing stand-up, but he was doing a version of Kramer, a version of like crazy, and he fell on a glass.

00:57:41.000 Oh, yeah.

00:57:41.000 And he broke the glass and cut himself.

00:57:43.000 But everyone laughed.

00:57:44.000 And I think everyone was like, I think he's bleeding.

00:57:46.000 But it was like really off.

00:57:48.000 Well, he was doing really off stuff from the jump.

00:57:50.000 Like, he came to the store.

00:57:52.000 I think he just decided to start doing stand-up because Seinfeld had been canceled for a long time, wanted to start doing something again.

00:57:58.000 And he started doing stand-up, but he didn't have any material.

00:58:00.000 He would just kind of fall down.

00:58:02.000 It was weird.

00:58:03.000 He would, like, pretend that something went wrong and like try to do the mic stand and slip and fall.

00:58:08.000 It was very odd, which is also my theory that I've been telling everybody about Chevy Chase.

00:58:14.000 Ooh, I'd love to hear that.

00:58:17.000 So everybody is talking about what a terrible person Chevy Chase is.

00:58:20.000 And, you know, there's all these videos that come out of him screaming at people and being mean.

00:58:26.000 I saw one with Bill Murray, Rodney Dangerfield, and him, where it's like right when they're promoting Caddyshack.

00:58:31.000 Yeah, and he just yells at some other guy, right?

00:58:33.000 Some other guy that's on the set.

00:58:35.000 And this is my take on it.

00:58:37.000 I want you to pull up the like a compilation of Chevy Chase's Pratt Falls.

00:58:45.000 Okay.

00:58:46.000 Chevy Chase has to be in constant pain.

00:58:50.000 Has to be.

00:58:51.000 He has to be in constant pain and almost 100% has CTE.

00:58:56.000 Chevy Chase used to throw himself down flights of stairs.

00:59:01.000 He used to throw himself off the stage into chairs and tables.

00:59:06.000 He used to like slip, go flying through the air, land on his head.

00:59:11.000 The most ridiculous Pratt falls.

00:59:15.000 The most aggressive, violent Pratt falls you've ever seen.

00:59:19.000 And he did this for years.

00:59:21.000 For years.

00:59:21.000 Yeah.

00:59:22.000 Like he was in a car crash multiple times a week for years.

00:59:26.000 Wow.

00:59:27.000 Yeah.

00:59:28.000 I mean, maybe he had a shitty personality already.

00:59:30.000 Well, I think he was also that first generation of what fame is.

00:59:34.000 Like he was the most famous person to ever come off SNL ever.

00:59:37.000 Like his walking off SNL was like, get ready for a movie star.

00:59:41.000 And I don't think we'll ever, I won't ever understand the level of fame he had.

00:59:47.000 At the time.

00:59:48.000 Like his fame was like.

00:59:50.000 And this is also, I mean, like, look, I love Burt Reynolds.

00:59:53.000 But Steve Martin was super famous too, and he's not a cunt.

00:59:56.000 No.

00:59:56.000 You know what I mean?

00:59:57.000 It's like, I don't think that's it.

00:59:59.000 I want you to see these videos.

01:00:00.000 I don't know why I can't find a compilation.

01:00:02.000 I can find a bunch of videos of it.

01:00:05.000 I know there's a compilation because I've seen it.

01:00:06.000 I just typed it in, and the video that pops up only has a four-minute video of him on Johnny Carson.

01:00:12.000 No, no.

01:00:13.000 I know.

01:00:14.000 I'm telling you.

01:00:15.000 There's a bunch.

01:00:17.000 There's a bunch.

01:00:18.000 Deral Ford.

01:00:19.000 That was Gerald Ford fell, right?

01:00:22.000 So he would, yeah, because Gerald Ford was kind of like Biden.

01:00:25.000 He would fall all the time.

01:00:26.000 So here is look at that.

01:00:30.000 You know how hard he falls there?

01:00:32.000 Go back and watch that again.

01:00:34.000 Watch how hard he falls when he does this.

01:00:36.000 This is him doing this Christmas.

01:00:41.000 The Christmas thing that you just showed.

01:00:44.000 I'm telling you, I just accidentally disappeared.

01:00:46.000 Hmm.

01:00:48.000 You could find it.

01:00:50.000 There it is.

01:00:51.000 Okay, watch this.

01:00:52.000 Watch him fall.

01:00:52.000 Watch this.

01:00:54.000 Boom.

01:00:55.000 Headfirst.

01:00:56.000 With the tree, falls down, barely stops his fall.

01:01:03.000 Chevy Chase's worst wrestling moments from Saturday Live.

01:01:06.000 Like, this is just him just stumbling around.

01:01:10.000 This is nothing.

01:01:12.000 But there's videos of him.

01:01:16.000 Okay, obviously that chair is going to break.

01:01:23.000 No, this is not what I'm looking for.

01:01:25.000 See if he can find it.

01:01:26.000 Find it and get back to us.

01:01:28.000 But there's, I know there's videos of him like literally like flying off stage, landing on his back, slipping, legs up in the air, landing on the ladder.

01:01:38.000 Yeah.

01:01:38.000 I had to fall off a ladder for a TV show one time.

01:01:41.000 They're like, we need you to fall.

01:01:42.000 And they had a crash pad.

01:01:45.000 You get four steps up a ladder.

01:01:46.000 You're high as fuck.

01:01:47.000 Well, even if you have a crash pad, your head is wobbling around, right?

01:01:52.000 So your brain is sloshing around from the impact.

01:01:55.000 This is one of the things that people don't realize.

01:01:56.000 Like, football players get brain damage from getting hit in the chest.

01:02:01.000 So CTE you can get from riding a jet ski, from bouncing on the waves.

01:02:07.000 It's your brain walking, fucking bouncing around off the walls of your skull.

01:02:12.000 From roller coasters.

01:02:13.000 You can get it from everything.

01:02:14.000 You can get it from a lot of things.

01:02:16.000 Repeated.

01:02:17.000 subconcussive trauma.

01:02:18.000 But he fell and landed on his fucking head.

01:02:22.000 And if you find the video that's a compilation, there's a compilation of people like the worst falls of Chevy Chase.

01:02:28.000 And it's crazy.

01:02:29.000 Really?

01:02:30.000 And he did this for years.

01:02:32.000 That was his thing.

01:02:33.000 Slip and fall, slip and fall, slip and fall.

01:02:35.000 And tons of Coke.

01:02:36.000 All those things.

01:02:37.000 So slip and fall, allegedly, tons of Coke.

01:02:40.000 Allegedly.

01:02:41.000 Allegedly.

01:02:42.000 I mean, I don't know.

01:02:43.000 I've read some books.

01:02:44.000 Yeah, but the book on, do you know what happened when Bill Murray was here?

01:02:48.000 When he was talking?

01:02:48.000 Wired?

01:02:49.000 You're talking about Bill Woodward?

01:02:50.000 I love that book.

01:02:51.000 So when he read Wired, he read.

01:02:54.000 So the guy who wrote Wired was Bob Woodward.

01:02:57.000 Bob Woodward was the guy that was involved in Watergate.

01:02:59.000 He was the naval intelligence officer who became a journalist.

01:03:03.000 And his first ever assignment was to take down the president, which is very suspicious.

01:03:10.000 Tucker Carlson told me the whole story behind it.

01:03:12.000 I was like, what?

01:03:13.000 The people that broke in were all FBI.

01:03:15.000 The whole thing was a setup.

01:03:17.000 It was to set Nixon up.

01:03:18.000 And they'd already gotten rid of Spiro Agnew, who was his VP.

01:03:22.000 They got him on, I think, corruption charges.

01:03:24.000 I forget what it was.

01:03:25.000 Didn't Kennedy put the bug system in there?

01:03:29.000 It was the president before that put the wiring inside the room, right?

01:03:35.000 What room?

01:03:36.000 In Watergate.

01:03:38.000 No.

01:03:39.000 Listen, it was a setup.

01:03:41.000 Nixon was not involved in the setup, but they told him about what happened, and then he was involved in the cover-up.

01:03:49.000 That's how they got him, and that's how he got removed from office.

01:03:51.000 And the recordings were from his office, right?

01:03:53.000 The recordings were from the Democratic Party.

01:03:56.000 So he was recording the Democratic Party.

01:03:58.000 He was recording, he was secretly recording the opposition party, but he didn't do it.

01:04:04.000 So the FBI did it, and then they brought it to him knowing that he would cover it up, and that's where he committed the crime.

01:04:11.000 Like instead of coming out and saying, hey, some people have recorded these people.

01:04:16.000 Even if he did that, they would have said he was involved.

01:04:19.000 But the whole thing was to get him out of office.

01:04:22.000 The reason why they wanted to get him out of office is because he was publicly and privately stating, at least amongst other people that were in the White House, that he knew who killed JFK and he was going to get to the bottom of it.

01:04:33.000 Because look, JFK had just been killed.

01:04:35.000 He ran against JFK in 1960.

01:04:39.000 60 or 62?

01:04:40.000 62?

01:04:41.000 What year was it?

01:04:42.000 Either way, I think it was 60.

01:04:44.000 He ran against JFK.

01:04:46.000 And then JFK gets assassinated.

01:04:48.000 And now he's the president.

01:04:49.000 And when he's the president, he was publicly stating or privately stating to different people, like he was going to get to the bottom of it, and he knew who killed JFK.

01:04:58.000 He was like investigating it.

01:04:59.000 He was interested in it, obviously, because he was worried they were going to kill him.

01:05:02.000 And so then they set him up and they removed him from office.

01:05:04.000 And they put Gerald Ford in as his VP.

01:05:07.000 Gerald Ford was also on the Warren Commission.

01:05:10.000 Like the whole thing was a giant setup to get rid of the most popular president in the history of the country.

01:05:16.000 You know, and everybody's like, oh, Nixon's a crook.

01:05:18.000 Nixon's a crack.

01:05:19.000 I'm not a crook.

01:05:20.000 That was all like his gigantic propaganda PR campaign to remove Nixon from office.

01:05:27.000 It was all a deep state operation.

01:05:29.000 Wow.

01:05:30.000 Nixon won the presidency like the widest margin of anybody in history.

01:05:34.000 He was the most popular president in history.

01:05:36.000 And in today's days, we think of Nixon as being a crook and a scumbag.

01:05:40.000 But he didn't even do it.

01:05:42.000 He was just involved in the cover-up when they brought it to him.

01:05:45.000 Was like, what is he going to do?

01:05:46.000 He's running for president again to re-election.

01:05:48.000 And they're saying, you know, hey, these guys, they busted these guys' recording things.

01:05:53.000 They're cover it up, cover it up, cover it up.

01:05:56.000 And so that's how they got him.

01:05:58.000 And what was his post-presidency like?

01:05:59.000 So what do you mean?

01:06:00.000 I'm sorry.

01:06:00.000 Let me finish.

01:06:01.000 So before I go any further, so Bill Murray is here, and he said he read the first couple pages of Wired, and he goes, he put it down.

01:06:10.000 He goes, oh, my God, they framed Nixon.

01:06:13.000 That was the first thing that he said.

01:06:16.000 He said, because the version that Bob Woodward told of John Belushi, his very good friend, was so wildly off.

01:06:24.000 He goes, that time where John did that speedball and died was probably the only time where he ever did that.

01:06:30.000 He goes, he was a total lightweight.

01:06:31.000 He would have a couple of drinks and he would be drunk.

01:06:34.000 He wasn't a guy who did drugs all the time.

01:06:36.000 He goes, it was all bullshit.

01:06:37.000 Are you serious?

01:06:38.000 Yes.

01:06:39.000 Do you realize guys like Chris Farley literally idolized John Belushi because of books like Wired?

01:06:45.000 Exactly.

01:06:46.000 Exactly.

01:06:46.000 And well, the difference is Chris Farley really was doing drugs.

01:06:50.000 Myself, I idolized John Belushi.

01:06:52.000 I read Wired when I was in college and was like, dude, this is, I mean, there's so many aspects of my personality that I draw from a book like that of like the way he was comfortable in an agent's office and B12 shots I get because of John Belushi.

01:07:07.000 Well, I'm sure he did all those things, and I'm sure he partied, but like the version, this exaggerated version of just being completely out of control on drugs was fake.

01:07:19.000 And this is according to Bill Murray, who was best friends with him.

01:07:22.000 He's like, it's not true.

01:07:23.000 It's like if somebody tried to write something about you and I read it and I was like, this is not Bird at all.

01:07:29.000 So his initial thought was, oh my God, they framed Nixon.

01:07:34.000 Jesus Christ.

01:07:35.000 And they did.

01:07:36.000 They did frame Nixon.

01:07:37.000 See if you can find the video of Tucker Carlson explaining to me how they framed Nixon.

01:07:43.000 I have a copy of Wired in my tour bus.

01:07:45.000 Yeah, don't read it.

01:07:46.000 I'm going to get rid of it.

01:07:47.000 Bob Woodward was an intelligence agent.

01:07:49.000 100%.

01:07:50.000 He was naval intelligence.

01:07:52.000 And then he left from that, which he never really leaves.

01:07:54.000 And then he became a reporter for the Washington Post.

01:07:58.000 And his first job was Watergate.

01:08:00.000 Which is nonsense.

01:08:01.000 It's a fucking insane.

01:08:02.000 There's no way.

01:08:03.000 A senior reporter would be covering the most important story.

01:08:05.000 You wouldn't give it to a rookie whose first assignment.

01:08:10.000 And what about Bernstein?

01:08:12.000 What about him?

01:08:13.000 Because didn't they write it together?

01:08:13.000 I don't know.

01:08:15.000 Yeah, they did.

01:08:15.000 And the Deep Throat was there.

01:08:18.000 Did we ever find out who Deep Throat was?

01:08:19.000 Yeah, listen to this, though.

01:08:20.000 This is seven minutes long.

01:08:21.000 You're going to watch the whole thing.

01:08:22.000 Let's listen to some of it because it's interesting.

01:08:24.000 That's what it is.

01:08:25.000 It's their tool, and they're perfectly aware of that.

01:08:29.000 I mean, I used to write for the New York Times as a freelancer.

01:08:31.000 I mean, I've been around the New York Times a lot.

01:08:33.000 And there are a lot of really smart people there for sure, even now.

01:08:37.000 I would say less so now, but there's still, I think, smart people there.

01:08:40.000 There are.

01:08:41.000 I know some.

01:08:42.000 And they know.

01:08:44.000 But they think that, you know, it's worth it because they're bringing information.

01:08:48.000 I don't know what they think, actually.

01:08:50.000 But no, they're tools of power.

01:08:54.000 And that's like the one thing that you're not allowed to be.

01:08:56.000 Even if you think the power is good, like maybe they all support the agenda of the U.S. government, destabilizing the world and impoverishing their own population.

01:09:02.000 Maybe they're on board with that.

01:09:05.000 Even if they are, they shouldn't do it because the job of the media, the press, is to keep power in check.

01:09:14.000 You are kind of like the seatbelt, right?

01:09:17.000 You know, you make sure that things don't go too far.

01:09:22.000 So, and they're not doing that.

01:09:25.000 They're acting as a willing handmaiden.

01:09:27.000 When do you think that switched?

01:09:28.000 Well, I think it's been the case for a long time.

01:09:30.000 I mean, if you look at what happened to Richard Nixon, which I, of course, did not understand at all, Richard Nixon was taken out by the FBI and CIA, and With the help of Bob Woodward, who was a Washington Post reporter, who had been a naval intelligence officer working in the White House, working in the Nixon White House.

01:09:52.000 And then he shows up like a year later, and he's this brand new reporter.

01:09:58.000 He'd never been a journalist at all.

01:10:00.000 He's a naval intel officer, the famous Bob Woodward we all revere.

01:10:05.000 And he's at the Washington Post, and somehow he gets the biggest story in the history of the Washington Post.

01:10:10.000 He's the lead guy in that story.

01:10:12.000 Well, I worked at a newspaper.

01:10:14.000 I've been in the news business my whole life.

01:10:15.000 That is not how it works.

01:10:16.000 You don't take a kid like his first day from a totally unrelated business and put him on the biggest story.

01:10:23.000 But he was.

01:10:24.000 He was that guy.

01:10:25.000 And who is his main source for Watergate?

01:10:27.000 Oh, the number two guy at the FBI.

01:10:30.000 Oh, so you have the naval intelligence officer working with the FBI official to destroy the president.

01:10:38.000 Okay, so that's a deep state coup.

01:10:40.000 What else?

01:10:41.000 How would you describe that?

01:10:42.000 If that happened in Guatemala, what would you say?

01:10:44.000 And yet the way it was framed and the way that I accepted for decades was, oh, this intrepid reporter fought power.

01:10:50.000 No, no, no.

01:10:51.000 This intrepid reporter, Bob Woodward, was a tool of power, secret power, which is the most threatening kind, to bounce the single most popular president in American history, Richard Nixon, from office before the end of his term and replace him with who?

01:11:08.000 Oh, Gerald Ford, who sat on the Warren Commission.

01:11:11.000 Now, how did Gerald Ford get to be Richard Nixon's vice president?

01:11:15.000 Well, because Carl Albert, the Democrat Speaker of the House, told him you must choose him.

01:11:20.000 We will only confirm him when they sent the actual elected vice president away for tax evasion, Spiro Agnew of Maryland.

01:11:29.000 So you have a complete setup.

01:11:32.000 Gerald Ford, the only unelected president in American history, actually sat on the Warren Commission.

01:11:37.000 Something else that I accepted at face value until I looked at it and was like, that's completely insane.

01:11:41.000 You didn't want to interview Jack Ruby in your investigation of the assassination?

01:11:45.000 Okay, you're fake.

01:11:46.000 Yeah, he was on the Warren Commission.

01:11:49.000 And so, sorry for the long story, but the point is, like, that happened in front of all of us, but the way it was framed cloaked the obvious reality of it.

01:11:58.000 The people who broke into the Watergate office building from which the name is taken, Watergate, I think it was six of them or seven of them.

01:12:06.000 All but one was a CIA employee.

01:12:09.000 That's real.

01:12:10.000 It's like, look it up on Google.

01:12:12.000 So the whole thing, Richard Nixon was elected by more votes than any president in American history in the 1972 election.

01:12:22.000 He was the most popular, by votes, which is the only way we can really measure popularity, the most popular president in his reelection campaign.

01:12:29.000 And two years later, he's gone.

01:12:31.000 Undone by a naval intel officer, the number two guy at the FBI, and a bunch of CIA employees.

01:12:37.000 You tell me what that is.

01:12:39.000 Those are the facts.

01:12:40.000 Those are not disputed facts.

01:12:41.000 That's not crackpot shit.

01:12:43.000 That's just look it up.

01:12:45.000 So why did they want to get rid of Nixon?

01:12:50.000 You know, there are a lot of theories on that.

01:12:51.000 I mean, we don't, first of all, we don't need to know motive to know what happened.

01:12:56.000 They, meaning unelected federal employees, got rid of Richard Nixon, which is the most anti-democratic way to make a leadership change that there is.

01:13:07.000 Okay?

01:13:08.000 I should just say at the end, I actually kind of believe in democracy.

01:13:10.000 Obviously, it's not working well.

01:13:12.000 Obviously, it's ending globally.

01:13:13.000 There will never be another liberal democracy, unfortunately.

01:13:16.000 But I'm attached to it because I was born here.

01:13:18.000 I really believe in it, and it's better than any other system.

01:13:21.000 So that's why I'm pissed.

01:13:23.000 What was their motive?

01:13:25.000 There are a lot of theories on this.

01:13:27.000 There's an amazing conversation.

01:13:28.000 It's on tape between Richard Nixon when he was still president.

01:13:32.000 I think it was in 1973.

01:13:34.000 And I think it was Richard Helms, the head of the CIA, though I may have fucked that up, but it was the head of the CIA.

01:13:40.000 It was Helms.

01:13:41.000 And Nixon says, I know why they killed Jack Kennedy.

01:13:46.000 So Nixon was a student of history, obviously a flawed and complicated person, but a very, very smart person.

01:13:53.000 And he was really interested in why this guy who'd been president, just one president before him, was murdered.

01:14:00.000 And he didn't think it was a lone gunman who was mysteriously assassinated two days later by another lone gunman.

01:14:06.000 Like it's so obviously bullshit.

01:14:08.000 And he knew that.

01:14:09.000 And he said to the SAA director, who, and you can listen to the tape, it's on the internet, is totally silent on this question.

01:14:17.000 So I think there was the impression, I don't think I know, that Nixon understood that the bureaucracy was really in control of the country.

01:14:24.000 It wasn't elected officials.

01:14:27.000 And that's a massive threat because it's true.

01:14:31.000 That's good.

01:14:32.000 Dude.

01:14:33.000 Yeah.

01:14:34.000 That's all media.

01:14:35.000 Yeah.

01:14:36.000 All media takes their slant and their angle and decides they're going to dictate it their way as opposed to I don't even know.

01:14:43.000 I don't even know of a journalist that I mean, no one, there's no one that sits objectively and watches anything anymore.

01:14:53.000 No, not in mainstream media.

01:14:54.000 No, absolutely.

01:14:55.000 You saw what they did with the photo of that kid who got shot, that pretty guy who got shot in Minneapolis.

01:15:01.000 MSNBC doctored his photo and made him better looking, fixed his teeth, squared his jaw, gave him a tan.

01:15:08.000 You haven't seen it?

01:15:09.000 No.

01:15:10.000 Please pull that up. 0.98

01:15:11.000 We showed it yesterday, but we'll show it again today, the before and after.

01:15:14.000 It's in the text that I sent.

01:15:16.000 It's fucking crazy.

01:15:17.000 Look at the difference.

01:15:19.000 What?

01:15:20.000 Yeah.

01:15:20.000 It's him on the left.

01:15:21.000 He looks like Ari's brother.

01:15:23.000 On the right, he looks like some fucking handsome CrossFitter.

01:15:28.000 Look at the difference.

01:15:29.000 Look at the teeth.

01:15:31.000 Look at the nose.

01:15:32.000 They shrunk his nose.

01:15:33.000 They widened his jaw.

01:15:34.000 They shrunk his chin.

01:15:36.000 It's crazy.

01:15:38.000 They decided he was too ugly to be sympathetic towards.

01:15:42.000 So then, man, this kind of bums me out.

01:15:48.000 I mean, I always kind of had hopes up that if I turned on the news, I'd hear some objective rant or some objectiveness of anything, but there's none.

01:15:58.000 Yeah, you got to go independent.

01:16:00.000 You got to go to Glenn Greenwald and Michael Schellenberger and people like that, Matt Taibbi.

01:16:04.000 You got to go to independent journalists.

01:16:05.000 They're the only ones that are going to give you the real deal.

01:16:07.000 People that are connected to giant corporations, their jobs distribute the news, they're not going to give you.

01:16:12.000 They're going to give you a narrative that's approved.

01:16:15.000 Who was Deep Throat?

01:16:17.000 Because Deep Throat was exposed.

01:16:19.000 They did eventually expose Deep Throat, and it's even more shocking when you find out who Deep Throat was.

01:16:25.000 I saw the movie.

01:16:27.000 That's a different movie.

01:16:28.000 That's about Suck and Cock. 1.00

01:16:29.000 That was a good one.

01:16:31.000 Well, the name of Deep Throat was because it nodded to the movie.

01:16:36.000 Yeah, the movie came out first.

01:16:36.000 Oh, for real?

01:16:41.000 Deep Throat was W. Mark Felt, the number two official at the FBI during Watergate, who secretly provided key information to Washington Post reporter Bob Woodburn.

01:16:50.000 So the FBI was involved in the break-in.

01:16:53.000 The number two official at the FBI was the guy who was providing information under the name Deep Throat.

01:16:59.000 So the FBI did it.

01:17:00.000 They did the whole thing.

01:17:03.000 Is that your phone?

01:17:04.000 Yeah, I'm an old man, Joe.

01:17:05.000 I'm an old man.

01:17:06.000 It's the FBI.

01:17:07.000 He's not FBI too.

01:17:09.000 Who's calling you when it's on Do Not Disturb?

01:17:11.000 It might be the FBI.

01:17:12.000 Spam risk, should I answer? 0.52

01:17:14.000 No.

01:17:15.000 Why is it?

01:17:16.000 I don't understand.

01:17:16.000 You put it on.

01:17:17.000 I have no idea, Joe.

01:17:18.000 I'm old.

01:17:19.000 They're hacking it.

01:17:20.000 They probably do.

01:17:21.000 That's a weird ring, though.

01:17:22.000 That's an old man choice. 1.00

01:17:25.000 Because my wife doesn't answer her fucking phone, so I turned her ring to that, so she changed my ring to that. 1.00

01:17:29.000 We're two old fucking people.

01:17:31.000 So then what's the fix?

01:17:32.000 How do I trust anyone?

01:17:34.000 You have to trust independent news.

01:17:36.000 Independent media that's not connected to any corporation.

01:17:39.000 Because as soon as you're connected to a corporation, you're connected to advertisers.

01:17:42.000 As soon as you're connected to advertisers, a giant percentage of advertisers on television is pharmaceutical drug companies, major corporations.

01:17:52.000 So you have things that you're not allowed to touch.

01:17:54.000 That's why you never hear anything in all the news about vaccine injuries.

01:17:58.000 You never.

01:17:59.000 Never hear about all these people that are having strokes, all these people that are the rise in heart attacks, the rise in myocarditis, particularly amongst young people, blood clots.

01:18:08.000 That's what we were talking about.

01:18:09.000 I got vaxxed like four times.

01:18:11.000 Like boosters from WW Johnson, Johnson Johnson.

01:18:16.000 And that's the first thing they say when they start looking at blood cuts.

01:18:19.000 They're like, do you get vaccinated?

01:18:20.000 And I was like, yeah, four times.

01:18:21.000 Even doctors like, you didn't need to do it four times.

01:18:24.000 Yeah, well, I don't know why you did that.

01:18:25.000 Because you had to get in a goddamn concert.

01:18:27.000 You had to show up.

01:18:28.000 You didn't have to have four of them to get in a concert.

01:18:30.000 First one was real early.

01:18:32.000 Like, I got it when you were gotten canceled for getting it.

01:18:35.000 They're like, just Mexican people. 1.00

01:18:37.000 And I just went in with a mask on, like, hola.

01:18:39.000 And got a fucking shot in East LA because I had to go shoot a movie.

01:18:43.000 Oh, wow.

01:18:43.000 They're like, do not show your fucking face.

01:18:45.000 And I was like, I won't.

01:18:46.000 I won't.

01:18:47.000 Why not show your face?

01:18:48.000 Because it was back when it was like, it was just, what was it?

01:18:52.000 Not needy workers.

01:18:53.000 What is it called?

01:18:54.000 Remember the first round of it?

01:18:56.000 It was like people you need in the country, you know.

01:18:56.000 Support workers?

01:18:59.000 Right.

01:19:00.000 Essential essential workers.

01:19:01.000 Yeah.

01:19:02.000 And then I was shooting a movie, so they got me a pass to get it.

01:19:04.000 Oh, so you got it when you weren't supposed to get it?

01:19:06.000 Yeah, way early.

01:19:07.000 Way early.

01:19:08.000 Interesting.

01:19:09.000 And then I got it.

01:19:12.000 I had to get it again in Serbia.

01:19:15.000 For a movie?

01:19:16.000 And yeah, and that's when.

01:19:17.000 They made you get it again?

01:19:18.000 Yeah.

01:19:18.000 Again.

01:19:18.000 And then I got it when I came home, and then I got it one more time.

01:19:21.000 Mo Amer told me how to do it.

01:19:22.000 He had to get boosted before they let him do his Netflix series.

01:19:26.000 Yeah.

01:19:28.000 Like, why?

01:19:29.000 Meanwhile, he'd had COVID.

01:19:30.000 He'd recovered.

01:19:32.000 He had COVID when we were all doing those concerts, when me and Chappelle and him and a bunch of other guys were doing those pandemic concerts.

01:19:41.000 He got COVID.

01:19:42.000 So there was no reason for him to get boosted.

01:19:45.000 I got boosted four times.

01:19:46.000 I got COVID 11 times.

01:19:47.000 Like what I mean, it's like fucking so crazy It's crazy.

01:19:51.000 I had COVID when I was shooting Free Bird.

01:19:54.000 Jesus.

01:19:54.000 I gave it to a bunch of people.

01:19:57.000 They were like, he got a cough.

01:19:58.000 And I was like, ah, it's fine.

01:20:00.000 Do you want to get tested?

01:20:01.000 I was like, no, I'm not getting tested.

01:20:03.000 My wife asked me to wear a condom. 0.99

01:20:04.000 I was like, we're good, guys.

01:20:07.000 And then I gave it to one of the dudes, I think.

01:20:10.000 And the dude was wearing a mask.

01:20:11.000 He was the only one that got it.

01:20:13.000 Shout out to my buddy.

01:20:15.000 Well, he probably had gotten boosted a bunch of times.

01:20:18.000 I should tell everyone to watch Free Bird on Netflix.

01:20:21.000 I should say that.

01:20:22.000 Keep going.

01:20:23.000 Can I tell you something I'm obsessed with?

01:20:25.000 I've been dying to talk to you about.

01:20:28.000 So like I watched the, I've been watching a lot of UFC lately, and I want your perspective because I'm thinking of this globally.

01:20:36.000 Like Jordan, they compare Jordan and LeBron James, right?

01:20:40.000 And they compare Tom Brady to Joe Montana.

01:20:43.000 And the big argument they always say is, well, you know, Tom Brady couldn't play in the league Joe Montana played in because the rules were different.

01:20:50.000 They got fucked up left and right, right?

01:20:53.000 And like they were concussions and there was no roughing the passer.

01:20:56.000 You could hit the quarterback late, all that shit.

01:20:58.000 Right.

01:20:58.000 Well, what about UFC?

01:21:00.000 Because like, how would say, and I don't mean slanderous, I just curious.

01:21:05.000 Okay.

01:21:05.000 Someone like Tank Abbott or Dan Severnson or Hoyce Gracie, how would they fare against, say, the fighters that are fighting today?

01:21:15.000 Well, it really all depends on whether or not they, I think Tank Abbott would do really well.

01:21:21.000 I think Tank Abbott would do really well because the heavyweight division is the most shallow division.

01:21:26.000 Like, would he do really well against the guys like Cyril Gawne or Tom Aspinall?

01:21:31.000 Probably not.

01:21:31.000 But he didn't do really well against guys like Maury Smith, you know, the real elite strikers of the day.

01:21:36.000 But Tank Abbott was a fucking huge man.

01:21:40.000 I mean, he was an enormous, powerful guy who had ridiculous knockout power, and he would brawl.

01:21:47.000 And anybody who brawled, like, look at Derek Lewis.

01:21:49.000 Derek Lewis has the most knockouts in the history of the UFC.

01:21:52.000 And he's not like the most highly skilled guy in the sport.

01:21:57.000 He's just a really big, powerful guy who has unbelievable knockout power.

01:22:01.000 And he's still relatively successful even today.

01:22:04.000 I mean, he has the most knockouts in the history of the heavyweight division.

01:22:06.000 But Tank Abbott would still fuck a lot of people up in the lower ranks of the heavyweight division.

01:22:10.000 Dan Severin would still take a lot of people down and beat their asses because he was an elite wrestler.

01:22:15.000 Like those kind of skills, Mark Coleman would take a lot of people down and beat their asses.

01:22:19.000 Those skills that they have, like the elite wrestlers and the really powerful punchers, they would always do well.

01:22:25.000 Hoist Gracie, first of all, if he was fighting in the UFC, he would be fighting without a gi. 0.99

01:22:34.000 So that would be different, right?

01:22:35.000 So he relied on the gi a lot because he would get a hold of guys and they would grab the gi like instinctively.

01:22:42.000 And he'd be like, great.

01:22:43.000 Like that's part, that's what he wanted.

01:22:46.000 And then once it went to the ground, I mean, it was like a man and a child.

01:22:51.000 Like his jiu-jitsu was so good.

01:22:53.000 And for the time, no one even knew jiu-jitsu.

01:22:56.000 So he was a black belt against white belts and he was just tapping out everybody. 0.97

01:22:59.000 Nobody had a chance.

01:23:01.000 In this day and age, that's just not the case anymore.

01:23:04.000 Hoist Gracie still, if he was alive today, or not if he's alive today.

01:23:09.000 Of course he's alive today.

01:23:10.000 If he was competing today, if he was a young man competing today, he would still give hell to a lot of people in an appropriate weight class if it went to the ground because his jiu-jitsu is so good.

01:23:22.000 His striking was always a means to an end.

01:23:24.000 His striking, he would go at a distance, he would kick at your legs, but his whole thing was about closing the distance, getting you to the ground, strangling you, getting on you an arm bar, tapping you out a triangle, jujitsu.

01:23:36.000 So he was a pure jiu-jitsu fighter.

01:23:38.000 And if it went to the ground today, he would still give real problems to a lot of fighters because he was that good.

01:23:45.000 He was that good on the ground.

01:23:47.000 And today, with the difference in training partners, he'd be even better.

01:23:50.000 Yeah.

01:23:51.000 I'm reading this book by Wright Thompson.

01:23:53.000 You know that dude?

01:23:55.000 He wrote Pappy Land.

01:23:56.000 No.

01:23:57.000 But he's talking about Jordan in this book and how at 50, Jordan had a hard time going to the next phase of his life.

01:24:05.000 He still was like, what if I put him on?

01:24:07.000 What if I put it?

01:24:08.000 Of course.

01:24:09.000 He's a champion.

01:24:10.000 It happens with fighters, too.

01:24:12.000 I mean, you go back to Shannon Sharping.

01:24:12.000 Oh, yeah.

01:24:14.000 He's doing better now financially than he ever did.

01:24:18.000 But I bet he'd trade it all just.

01:24:20.000 Yeah, it's the glory of sport.

01:24:22.000 It's like there's nothing else like those highs.

01:24:24.000 Those highs, especially for a fighter, when you're still like Justin Gaetchy this weekend, who beat Patty Pemblick?

01:24:30.000 Crazy fight.

01:24:31.000 That guy, when it was over, the happiness that he had, the smile on his face, he was so, he was just in a high, like nothing else in life.

01:24:40.000 It's hard for those guys to put that away.

01:24:42.000 It's hard for those guys to let that go.

01:24:45.000 And their identity is completely wrapped around the fact that they're an elite fighter.

01:24:50.000 How did you not have your identity about your career?

01:24:54.000 Because I know you pretty well, and you never really, like, it's tough to disconnect your identity to your career or your dreams or your hopes, which I think fighters, it's easy to understand.

01:25:02.000 Athletes, it's easy to understand.

01:25:04.000 But I think it happens with comedians and actors and even podcasters to say, how did you not do that?

01:25:11.000 Well, I don't know.

01:25:13.000 I recognize the pitfalls in it, but I also recognize that at the end of the day, you're just a human being.

01:25:18.000 And I think, man, I've said this a million times, and I'm sorry I have to repeat it, but I think brutal workouts are what center me.

01:25:26.000 It's the one thing that centers me more than anything in life because I do to myself, I humble myself all the time.

01:25:34.000 Like, I break myself, I break myself down all the time.

01:25:38.000 So that, like, when life comes or like all that other stuff seems like something I do, it's fun, it's great.

01:25:44.000 It's, but I'm just me.

01:25:46.000 I'm just a human being.

01:25:47.000 I'm, I'm me in the 10th round when I want to quit, and the bell goes off, and I know I have to hit the bag for three more minutes.

01:25:54.000 You know, like, I know who I am.

01:25:56.000 Like, I don't need my career to tell me who I am.

01:25:59.000 And I have enough fuck you money that I could just sail off into the sunset. 0.84

01:26:02.000 Do you think you will?

01:26:02.000 Bye-bye.

01:26:03.000 No.

01:26:04.000 I like this.

01:26:04.000 Why?

01:26:05.000 It's fun.

01:26:05.000 Yeah.

01:26:06.000 I thought about it.

01:26:07.000 I've thought about a bunch of things doing different things.

01:26:09.000 If I had multiple lives, I would live a bunch of different lives.

01:26:13.000 Oh, tell me about one.

01:26:14.000 I'd be a professional pool player.

01:26:16.000 That's what I would like to do.

01:26:18.000 Yeah.

01:26:18.000 I'd like to go on a tour, play professional pool.

01:26:21.000 If I just had like a year to really practice, I think I could do it.

01:26:25.000 It's just there's no way.

01:26:28.000 There's no money.

01:26:28.000 There's no time.

01:26:29.000 There's nothing.

01:26:30.000 So I just have to keep that one in my head as a hobby and make sure I don't get too addicted to it.

01:26:36.000 You know, my problem is I get addicted to things and then I just like obsess on them.

01:26:40.000 And then the weird part of my brain that focuses obsessively on things, it would just overcome all the rest of my life.

01:26:48.000 And it would just be this one thing that I think of.

01:26:50.000 I allow that in bursts.

01:26:52.000 Like I allow that when I was getting ready for my comedy special, my live special, that was my whole life.

01:26:57.000 I didn't think about anything else other than doing that set.

01:26:59.000 Like when I go hunting, I don't think about anything else other than getting in shape, shooting perfect arrows, getting ready to hunt.

01:27:06.000 I allow myself these brief moments of obsession, but I have to be careful.

01:27:11.000 I have to be careful with my brain.

01:27:14.000 Your brain's fascinating.

01:27:15.000 I wish I listened to you more.

01:27:17.000 Like when we were younger, you said stuff that I just was like, that's not right.

01:27:22.000 Like what?

01:27:23.000 It might not be right for you.

01:27:25.000 No, no, no.

01:27:26.000 I wish I had.

01:27:27.000 I remember one time you're like, you're like, you're working too hard.

01:27:31.000 Your focus should be less famous.

01:27:33.000 And I was like, what are you talking about?

01:27:35.000 And now I'm there.

01:27:36.000 I'm like, oh, I know exactly what you're talking about.

01:27:37.000 That's why I took the Spotify deal.

01:27:39.000 I was hoping I would be like 10% less famous.

01:27:42.000 That was my idea.

01:27:43.000 I was like, good.

01:27:44.000 Less people watch Spotify.

01:27:46.000 Less people listen.

01:27:47.000 How many people are going to go over there?

01:27:48.000 Like, Jamie kind of freaked out at the beginning because we lost half of our audience right away.

01:27:52.000 He's like, we lost half the crowd.

01:27:54.000 Like, so what?

01:27:56.000 Good.

01:27:56.000 Who cares?

01:27:57.000 I'll be less famous.

01:27:58.000 I wanted to be famous so bad.

01:27:58.000 I don't want to be.

01:28:00.000 Well, it's because you weren't.

01:28:01.000 Yeah.

01:28:02.000 Right.

01:28:02.000 And so I already was.

01:28:03.000 So I kind of had a perspective.

01:28:05.000 Like, this isn't what everybody thinks it is.

01:28:06.000 It's just weird.

01:28:08.000 You know, like the glory of it, it's all fake.

01:28:10.000 Like the people that love you, they don't even know you.

01:28:13.000 Like, it's kind of crazy.

01:28:14.000 Like, the people that love you should be the people that know you.

01:28:17.000 You know, that's a good thing.

01:28:19.000 If the people that know you hate you, but the rest of the world loves you, then you're in an Ellen position, right?

01:28:25.000 You're in this weird position where you're a fake person.

01:28:27.000 Yeah.

01:28:28.000 Where everybody thinks you're one thing, but you're actually another thing.

01:28:31.000 So the people around you don't like you.

01:28:33.000 And then when the water breaks and everybody starts talking, all the staff start talking shit about you and you realize like, oh, she was a monster.

01:28:39.000 You know, so I think I had the benefit of having some fame to realize, like, oh, this is not.

01:28:46.000 Also, I think about things a lot.

01:28:48.000 I don't just accept things for what they are.

01:28:50.000 If something's happening, I'm like, okay, but what is this really?

01:28:53.000 What is this really?

01:28:55.000 You did listen a little because I remember the one time I called you when you were on a motorcycle in Vietnam and I was like, bro, you got to quit that job.

01:29:03.000 And you're like, what?

01:29:04.000 And I was like, you got to, you're a funny comic, man.

01:29:06.000 You're a funny dude.

01:29:07.000 You're great on podcasts.

01:29:08.000 You don't need to do this.

01:29:09.000 Like, the world's changed.

01:29:11.000 This is holding you back.

01:29:12.000 Thank God.

01:29:13.000 Thank God.

01:29:14.000 You know, it's like I always say, like, thank God I had the right people in my life at the right times.

01:29:18.000 Because there's so much about, like, I'll tell you, like, you know, with the blood clot thing, they said, you know, I never, every time I got sober, it was always to like just prove I could get sober for a month, you know?

01:29:28.000 Right.

01:29:29.000 And just be like, I'll take a break, get healthy, get go blood work.

01:29:32.000 I'm back at it.

01:29:33.000 This is the first time I've ever looked at it like I never looked at how often I was disrespectful to my health.

01:29:41.000 Like how often I was like, like get in the airport and be like drinking at six in the morning, like fuck it, you know?

01:29:47.000 And then I go, and now that I'm flying, I'm forced to fly sober.

01:29:50.000 I get in the airport and I go, I'll have egg whites.

01:29:52.000 Egg whites, you need the yolk.

01:29:54.000 No, you can't have too much iron when you're on blood thinners.

01:29:57.000 Oh, God.

01:29:57.000 This whole fucking thing's a nightmare.

01:29:59.000 But they said sober for six months.

01:30:01.000 And then I, and then I had a really interesting conversation with my trainer and with Leanne over this conversation.

01:30:06.000 And they were like, you know, what's so funny is they don't see my lifestyle is partying and everything is disrespectful to my health because I work out, because I get blood work, because I'm sober for everyone.

01:30:17.000 They were saying, it's disrespectful to people that don't, that just stay online and scroll and don't live their life.

01:30:24.000 That was disrespectful.

01:30:26.000 Like, if you're just like, you come home and you lock into video games and you don't go out and you don't really connect with people and then you wake up and you scroll for three hours and then you light a cigarette and you go to work and you come home and you play video games, you're not living your life.

01:30:26.000 How so?

01:30:41.000 And they're like, Leanne was saying the other day, she's like, you know, don't look like get excited to start drinking again, but make sure that you can measure that, you know?

01:30:52.000 Get excited.

01:30:52.000 Just start drinking again is a wild thing to say.

01:30:54.000 Oh, I mean, I'm looking at it.

01:30:55.000 But how is it disrespectful to people that are watching you?

01:30:58.000 No, I meant, you know, people that aren't living. 0.80

01:31:02.000 Like people that are leaving comments and like shitting on girls, skateboarding, going, you should wear a bra whore. 1.00

01:31:08.000 Like guys that aren't living their life and not spending their time out with family and living their life.

01:31:12.000 So what's disrespectful to them?

01:31:15.000 You said it's disrespectful to them?

01:31:16.000 No, no, they're disrespecting their own life by not living.

01:31:20.000 Okay.

01:31:20.000 By not getting in the gym, not going out, not going and having dinner with your wife.

01:31:24.000 How is your life, you disrespecting your health, doing anything to them?

01:31:28.000 No, no.

01:31:29.000 I think it was just two parallels.

01:31:31.000 Like I was looking at health, thinking in hindsight, like how many times I just, you know, burned the candle at both ends.

01:31:37.000 Didn't think like how fragile life actually is.

01:31:41.000 Oh, yeah.

01:31:41.000 Well, you're very durable, unfortunately.

01:31:44.000 That's part of the problem.

01:31:45.000 So you were able to do that and show no bad health markers.

01:31:48.000 Like you were drinking all the time.

01:31:50.000 You got your blood work done.

01:31:51.000 Your liver's fine.

01:31:52.000 It's great.

01:31:52.000 You're like, look at this.

01:31:53.000 Like you were, I remember you were super nervous when you first started getting blood work, but then you're like, it turns out it's fine.

01:31:58.000 Yeah.

01:31:59.000 You, you have great genetics, you know?

01:31:59.000 Yeah.

01:32:01.000 But you think, I think now I go, man, I'm like, my grandfather died at 53.

01:32:07.000 And I'm 53.

01:32:09.000 And then you start seeing people die and you're like, shit, man.

01:32:13.000 Like, this blood clot scared the fuck out of me because people die from this.

01:32:13.000 Yeah.

01:32:16.000 They die from it.

01:32:17.000 It's not, it's no joke.

01:32:18.000 And then you're like, well, fuck, that was just me flying.

01:32:21.000 Did they make you do a D-dimer test?

01:32:23.000 No.

01:32:24.000 So a D-dimer test is when they test your body for clots, for microclots.

01:32:28.000 So apparently a lot of people that have got a ton of boosters got, they have microclots.

01:32:34.000 And this is one of the things, there was a Canadian doctor that was one of the first guys to get canceled for saying that the vaccine was causing clots because he was one of the first guys that was doing a D-dimer test on all of his patients.

01:32:48.000 And he found out that this vaccinated patients, the vast majority of them, were having these microclots all throughout their system.

01:32:56.000 And it was being caused, in his opinion, by the vaccine.

01:33:00.000 And boy, eventually his business wound up getting burned to the ground.

01:33:05.000 He lost his medical license.

01:33:07.000 He lost his practice.

01:33:08.000 It was a crazy story.

01:33:09.000 And he was right.

01:33:11.000 He was right.

01:33:11.000 And now it's pretty mainstream, like that discussion of it.

01:33:15.000 And, you know, even doctors who used to prescribe boosters don't prescribe them anymore, which is kind of crazy.

01:33:23.000 What point in time, like the people that are that used to say you need to get your booster?

01:33:27.000 Well, how come you're not getting boosters anymore?

01:33:29.000 COVID's still around.

01:33:30.000 Those people aren't getting boosters.

01:33:32.000 No one's getting boosters anymore.

01:33:33.000 None of those people are.

01:33:34.000 Are they saying that we have a higher antibody rate now?

01:33:37.000 Like, why is COVID not as dangerous today as it was then?

01:33:40.000 Well, the thing that happens with viruses is they become less potent but more transmissible.

01:33:47.000 And that becoming more transmissible allows the virus to spread, and being less potent means it doesn't kill the host.

01:33:54.000 So it's actually better for the virus to be more transmissible but less potent.

01:33:59.000 And that generally happens in time when people develop antibodies and people develop, you know, like a resistance to it.

01:34:06.000 So what happens is the virus just becomes easier to transmit but less potent.

01:34:11.000 Wow.

01:34:11.000 Yeah.

01:34:12.000 That's why the variants over time got less and less.

01:34:15.000 Like the delta variant was actually pretty strong, but after that they started dropping off.

01:34:19.000 And then Omicron was pretty nothing.

01:34:22.000 And then they stopped naming them because it really wasn't just a couple variants.

01:34:26.000 There's hundreds of them.

01:34:28.000 They don't even know how many.

01:34:29.000 And a lot of it is because they vaccinated during a pandemic.

01:34:33.000 And one of the things that virologists throughout history were always saying is you never vaccinate during a pandemic because when you vaccinate during a pandemic, you actually encourage variants.

01:34:46.000 Because the vaccine realizes, especially when you have a leaky vaccine, like COVID.

01:34:51.000 So what a leaky vaccine is, a vaccine that doesn't stop transmission and doesn't stop infection.

01:34:55.000 What it does is it gives you some protection through antibodies.

01:35:00.000 But that allows you to get the cold and then the cold realizes, oh, this guy's got these antibodies.

01:35:05.000 We'll just work around that.

01:35:07.000 And then people who had antibodies to the original wild virus, once they got vaccinated, this variant would see that they were, or it wouldn't see, but it would have a different pathway because their original immunity was to the wild virus.

01:35:29.000 The original antibodies were to the first virus that doesn't even exist anymore.

01:35:33.000 So your body didn't recognize these new variants.

01:35:37.000 So people get COVID even more easily.

01:35:39.000 I know I butchered that if you're a virologist.

01:35:41.000 But there's a guy named Geert Vanderbosch, and he is a vaccine specialist.

01:35:48.000 He's a virologist.

01:35:49.000 And one of his, he specializes in vaccines.

01:35:52.000 And he was one of the early people saying this is madness.

01:35:55.000 This goes against conventional thinking.

01:35:58.000 You do not vaccinate during a pandemic.

01:36:01.000 Jesus.

01:36:02.000 I tell you what, I've had COVID a bunch.

01:36:05.000 Nothing was like the swine flu.

01:36:07.000 Yeah, you told me that.

01:36:08.000 Remember in 2009, right?

01:36:09.000 You got it bad.

01:36:09.000 Dude.

01:36:10.000 I had it.

01:36:11.000 I thought I was going to die.

01:36:12.000 I've never been that sick in my life.

01:36:15.000 Shallow breathing.

01:36:17.000 I mean, it was, and I was in, I had to fly to Mexico because I was doing a gig.

01:36:22.000 And I was like, I got on the plane, I was drank on planes, had two drinks, and I was like, I was like, I'm at death's door.

01:36:28.000 And I'm fucking to this day, I've never been that sick in my life, and I don't know how it didn't kill me.

01:36:34.000 You never drink when you're sick.

01:36:35.000 Oh, no shit.

01:36:36.000 It is the worst.

01:36:37.000 It's so bad for your immune system to drink when you're sick because you just give your immune system this new thing to fight while it's already involved in a fight.

01:36:45.000 I got on the plane with Leanne.

01:36:46.000 We were flying to Mexico and I was like, I'm not that bad.

01:36:49.000 I remember being cold.

01:36:50.000 I remember it hit me like a ton of bricks that night.

01:36:53.000 I was like, I'm getting fucking sick immediately.

01:36:56.000 Like, it was like, bam.

01:36:58.000 And back then, you weren't even taking vitamins.

01:37:00.000 No, I wasn't doing anything.

01:37:02.000 Yeah, that's the problem.

01:37:03.000 And this is the other thing that the big problem that I had during the COVID thing is like I knew people were getting over COVID.

01:37:10.000 It wasn't killing everybody.

01:37:11.000 And they were making it out like everybody who was going to get it was going to die.

01:37:14.000 Everybody unvaccinated was going to die.

01:37:16.000 But I knew people that got it and weren't the healthiest people and they were fine.

01:37:20.000 So I'm like, well, what the hell's going on?

01:37:22.000 Like, what is it?

01:37:23.000 And how come nobody's talking about vitamins?

01:37:25.000 Nobody's talking about the impact that vitamins have on your immune system, which is well documented.

01:37:30.000 And then if you brought it up, you're a conspiracy theorist.

01:37:33.000 You're a crazy person.

01:37:34.000 But everyone listened because you brought up, I'll never forget the day you brought up vitamin D.

01:37:39.000 Yeah.

01:37:40.000 And I went to Rite A that day to get vitamin D, and it was gone.

01:37:45.000 I mean, the fuck, it was like it had been looted.

01:37:48.000 There was no vitamin D to be found.

01:37:50.000 And it was like, I think it was like D3 or something.

01:37:53.000 D3 and K2.

01:37:54.000 And gone.

01:37:56.000 And I was with magnesium is the move.

01:37:59.000 D3, K2, and magnesium all together.

01:38:02.000 Do you know what's so funny?

01:38:03.000 I have rosacea on my cheeks.

01:38:06.000 I just got it.

01:38:07.000 You get it when you're older sometimes.

01:38:09.000 And the cure is ivermectin.

01:38:11.000 That's hilarious.

01:38:12.000 They were like, you should get on ivermectin.

01:38:13.000 I was like, I said, you mean horse tranquilizer?

01:38:16.000 Horse paste.

01:38:17.000 Yeah.

01:38:17.000 Horse paste?

01:38:18.000 Horse dewormer.

01:38:19.000 Yeah.

01:38:19.000 Like what CNN called it.

01:38:20.000 But it's so great.

01:38:21.000 It was the first thing.

01:38:22.000 They're like, have you ever heard of ivermectin?

01:38:24.000 And I was like, my friends are Joe Rogan.

01:38:25.000 Are you kidding me?

01:38:27.000 Don't put me on CNN.

01:38:28.000 They'll make me purple.

01:38:29.000 Yeah.

01:38:30.000 Well, the crazy thing about that CNN thing is I mentioned a bunch of other things that I took.

01:38:34.000 All of them were very effective.

01:38:35.000 There wasn't one thing that I mentioned.

01:38:37.000 I mentioned IV vitamins.

01:38:40.000 And I took IV NAD, IV vitamins, and then the big one was monoclonal antibodies.

01:38:46.000 And monoclonal antibodies, they made it really hard for people to get after that because people were just saying, oh, I just need to get monoclonal antibodies and I'm better.

01:38:54.000 Bro, I shipped monoclonal.

01:38:56.000 We were using a telemedicine nurse, and it was a part of a nationwide service that you could send people, a nurse, and they would go deliver monoclonal antibodies and IV vitamins.

01:39:11.000 And the IV vitamins thing, it always existed, but the monoclonal antibodies, they added to it once COVID came.

01:39:18.000 And I can't tell you how many people that I sent nurses to, people that I didn't even know, people that were friends of friends, my mom's friend, and I'd say, give me the address, tell me who they are, and I'll send it to them.

01:39:30.000 And I paid for all of it.

01:39:31.000 And I did it to like at least 100 people.

01:39:34.000 No bullshit.

01:39:35.000 At least 100 people.

01:39:36.000 Yeah, actors who were like super liberal.

01:39:40.000 I didn't out any of them.

01:39:41.000 They would send me a DM.

01:39:43.000 Hey, man, I got COVID.

01:39:44.000 And I said, where are you?

01:39:44.000 What should I do?

01:39:46.000 Tell me where you live.

01:39:47.000 I'm going to have someone sent to you.

01:39:48.000 And I'd just send someone to them.

01:39:50.000 And then they'd come back and thank me.

01:39:52.000 Very few of them ever thanked me publicly, but a lot of them got the service.

01:39:58.000 And a lot of people that weren't famous people, just like my friend's mom or my mom or my uncle or my cousin, someone got COVID.

01:40:04.000 They're doing really bad.

01:40:05.000 I'm like, tell me where they are.

01:40:07.000 And I did it.

01:40:08.000 I'm not lying.

01:40:09.000 I did it to like 100 people.

01:40:10.000 I spent a lot of money doing it.

01:40:12.000 How much would something like that cost?

01:40:14.000 Thousands of dollars.

01:40:15.000 For real.

01:40:15.000 Yeah.

01:40:17.000 I did it for people I didn't know.

01:40:17.000 Yeah.

01:40:19.000 I did it for people I had never met.

01:40:21.000 I did it for people that were famous that I never met.

01:40:23.000 I just, I just said it was easier to meet for just to send them to them.

01:40:28.000 Leanne was the first person to get COVID in our house.

01:40:31.000 And I had a joke.

01:40:33.000 I used to have a joke about it.

01:40:34.000 She had COVID and she gave me a hand job and I didn't get it.

01:40:37.000 I was like, that's how intimate our hand jobs are.

01:40:39.000 That's hilarious.

01:40:40.000 And she got it.

01:40:42.000 And I remember doing, I remember I called you and you were like, get her the NAD.

01:40:45.000 You gave me the whole fucking list.

01:40:47.000 And we got it.

01:40:47.000 She got over it right away.

01:40:50.000 We ended up right away and we're like, cool, we can go skiing.

01:40:53.000 And then we all got it.

01:40:53.000 No, no, no, no.

01:40:55.000 You're not ready yet.

01:40:57.000 Georgia gave it to me.

01:40:58.000 She goes, I remember we were at the, George gave it to me.

01:41:00.000 And I remember we were sitting at the dinner table that night at our ski place.

01:41:04.000 And she was like, started crying.

01:41:05.000 Like, oh, baby, don't cry.

01:41:07.000 Listen, it's totally fine.

01:41:07.000 It's fine.

01:41:09.000 She was like, you're high risk.

01:41:13.000 You got to think of it as like, it's over.

01:41:16.000 The bad part's over.

01:41:18.000 But now your body's in recovery.

01:41:19.000 So you can't go skiing or do anything.

01:41:22.000 I went skiing.

01:41:23.000 I remember skiing the first day with COVID thinking, you know, it's just me.

01:41:26.000 The mountain was empty.

01:41:28.000 I was like, it's just me.

01:41:29.000 I don't really have it.

01:41:30.000 I'm fine.

01:41:30.000 I tested negative.

01:41:31.000 I remember I tested negative.

01:41:32.000 I was like, I'm just hungover from last night.

01:41:35.000 And when I got down, I tested again and I tested positive.

01:41:38.000 And I had already had my tour bus come and grab Georgia and Leanne and drive them back to LA.

01:41:42.000 So it's me and Isla.

01:41:44.000 Isla was like.

01:41:45.000 I only got it because I stayed up late one night drinking and playing pool till like five o'clock in the morning with my friend John Schulman.

01:41:52.000 I remember you telling me that you're like, it's more, you said you were more run down.

01:41:56.000 That's why you got it.

01:41:57.000 I was exhausted because my friend John, John Shulman, shout out to John.

01:42:02.000 He makes pool cues, like awesome pool cues.

01:42:04.000 He lives in Florida.

01:42:05.000 And I, you know, talk to him back and forth online, but I never hung out with him.

01:42:08.000 And then I made an appointment to meet him at a pool hall.

01:42:11.000 And we met at this pool hall and we played pool till like five o'clock in the morning, laughing, having a good time.

01:42:16.000 And then I got back to the hotel.

01:42:18.000 I was like, really tired.

01:42:20.000 I was like, boy, I fucked up.

01:42:22.000 Like, we were out and I had a bunch of margaritas and it was late.

01:42:22.000 I went so hard.

01:42:26.000 You know, it was late at night.

01:42:27.000 And then in the morning, I just felt like shit.

01:42:30.000 I took a hot bath.

01:42:31.000 I felt like shit.

01:42:32.000 I had a gig that night.

01:42:33.000 I did a gig that night.

01:42:34.000 I did an arena with Tony Henchcliffe and Laura Bites.

01:42:37.000 We did an arena in Florida.

01:42:39.000 And then I flew back home.

01:42:40.000 And on the way home, I was cold.

01:42:41.000 I was like, God, why am I so cold?

01:42:43.000 Is this airplane cold?

01:42:44.000 And then when I got home, I told my wife, I'm like, I'm not feeling good.

01:42:48.000 I go, I might have COVID.

01:42:49.000 Maybe you should sleep in another room.

01:42:50.000 Because she had gotten COVID and gotten over it, which, by the way, when she had it, I fucked her. 1.00

01:42:55.000 I didn't even think about it.

01:42:56.000 I was like, I'm trying to get it.

01:42:57.000 I never got it.

01:42:58.000 My whole family got it.

01:43:00.000 But like, I'm always been the one who's like, always cold plunging, always sauna, always vitamins, always working out.

01:43:07.000 She works out too, but it's like she got it, you know, and my kids got it.

01:43:11.000 And I was home.

01:43:12.000 I hugged them like, Daddy, you're going to get it.

01:43:13.000 I'm like, I'm getting shit.

01:43:15.000 I never got it.

01:43:16.000 I had two days when I worked out where I didn't feel that good.

01:43:19.000 So when I worked out, I just took it light.

01:43:21.000 I just went through the routine like nice and easy, not pushing myself.

01:43:25.000 And then the next day, still don't feel that good.

01:43:27.000 Nice and easy.

01:43:29.000 And then the third day, I'm like, I feel pretty fucking good.

01:43:31.000 And I went pretty hard.

01:43:32.000 I'm like, feel great.

01:43:33.000 And it was done.

01:43:34.000 I never got COVID.

01:43:35.000 And then that one time I got it.

01:43:37.000 And then I didn't get it that bad.

01:43:39.000 The one day I felt like shit.

01:43:41.000 I got all the meds.

01:43:43.000 And then, you know, a couple days later, I made that video and I put that video up.

01:43:47.000 But that was honest.

01:43:48.000 I was like, I got COVID.

01:43:49.000 I got all this medicine.

01:43:50.000 I feel better now.

01:43:52.000 They didn't like the idea that this healthy person was saying you could get over this.

01:43:57.000 And also a healthy person that's in their 50s was saying you can get over this and you don't need this radical experimental medicine that they're trying to push on people.

01:44:08.000 And so that's just another example of the mainstream media that's not there for the news.

01:44:13.000 Because if they really were there to inform people, they would say, well, what did he do?

01:44:16.000 What's different about him?

01:44:18.000 Because they're fucking compromised.

01:44:20.000 They're all compromised by the people that pay their advertising budget.

01:44:23.000 The amount of money that pharmaceutical drug companies spend on mainstream media is fucking preposterous.

01:44:29.000 And they don't do it because they're trying to convince people to sell drugs.

01:44:32.000 They do it specifically because they don't want those media organizations to criticize any vaccines or any pharmaceutical drugs.

01:44:41.000 You never hear them talking about there's no mainstream big media stories about side effects of some sort of new medication.

01:44:48.000 And if there is, it's because that company is probably about to go under and a new company is asking them to talk about it.

01:44:56.000 It makes me, I mean, I've always said and people think I'm a fucking idiot, but I don't trust sleep apnea machines.

01:45:02.000 Well, sleep apnea machines work.

01:45:03.000 I know, but I think they overdiagnose sleep apnea machines because there's a kickback.

01:45:08.000 There's got to be a kickback.

01:45:09.000 Well, there probably is.

01:45:10.000 There's a, you know, look, sleep apnea is a real thing and it's really fucking dangerous.

01:45:14.000 But is it, is it as I mean, people die.

01:45:16.000 Everyone's got it.

01:45:18.000 Well, not everyone has it.

01:45:19.000 It.

01:45:19.000 A lot of people snore, but there's ways around.

01:45:21.000 There's mouthpieces you can use that keep your tongue from closing your windpipe.

01:45:24.000 You know what I do?

01:45:25.000 I put a mouthpiece, I put a mouthpiece in, and then I use mouth tape.

01:45:29.000 I've been using mouth tape.

01:45:30.000 You know, like you know, a hostage tape?

01:45:32.000 Yeah.

01:45:33.000 Yeah, I use that stuff.

01:45:34.000 I put it over my mouth and I sleep and I breathe through my nose.

01:45:37.000 And I feel so much better when I wake up.

01:45:40.000 I mean, significantly better with less sleep.

01:45:43.000 Like if I have five hours sleep with hostage tape, I feel better than if I have eight hours sleep without it.

01:45:49.000 Really?

01:45:49.000 100%.

01:45:50.000 See, you feel different.

01:45:52.000 And I don't know why.

01:45:53.000 I'm sure.

01:45:54.000 Okay, let's find out.

01:45:55.000 What is the science behind breathing through your nose while you sleep?

01:45:59.000 Why is it better?

01:46:00.000 Like, what is the science behind it?

01:46:02.000 I don't know what the science is, but I know that a bunch of health experts recommended it to me.

01:46:08.000 I was like, tape my mouth shut?

01:46:09.000 That sounds so stupid.

01:46:11.000 I did it.

01:46:12.000 And then the first night I did it, I woke up and I'm like, whoa, I feel great.

01:46:17.000 Like, I feel significantly better.

01:46:19.000 And now I do it every night.

01:46:21.000 So I put a mouthpiece in and then I put the hostage tape over my mouth.

01:46:24.000 So the mouthpiece just holds your tongue in place?

01:46:26.000 Because I have a big tongue.

01:46:26.000 Exactly.

01:46:27.000 I have a big tongue and I have a big neck.

01:46:29.000 The problem is when you have big neck muscles, like football players, a lot of them, most of them have sleep apnea because all those muscles constrict the walls of your throat.

01:46:42.000 So like there's all this tissue that didn't exist before.

01:46:45.000 And then you have this fat tongue.

01:46:47.000 So I can't sleep on my back.

01:46:48.000 If I sleep on my back, it's like, that's me.

01:46:51.000 Yeah.

01:46:52.000 Okay.

01:46:52.000 Breathing through the nose during sleep offers key health advantages over mouth breathing.

01:46:56.000 It filters and conditions air for better lung efficiency and promotes deeper rest.

01:47:00.000 Nasal passages filter dust, allergens, and pollutants while warming and humidifying air, protecting the airwaves from irritation.

01:47:08.000 This reduces dryness in the mouth and throat common with mouth breathing.

01:47:12.000 I got that.

01:47:13.000 I wake up, my mouth's so dry, my tongue's like a finger.

01:47:16.000 Reduce snoring and sleep apnea risk.

01:47:18.000 Nose breathing keeps the tongue positioned correctly against the palate and jaw forward, maintaining an open airway that minimize snoring and sleep apnea episodes.

01:47:26.000 Mouth breathing allows the tongue to fall back, obstructing airflow, which definitely happens to me.

01:47:31.000 Improved oxygenagation.

01:47:34.000 Jesus.

01:47:36.000 Oxygenation and relaxation.

01:47:38.000 It boosts nitric oxide production for better oxygen uptake and blood flow, supporting deeper sleep cycles and parasympathetic nervous system activation for relaxation.

01:47:48.000 This leads to fewer awakenings and higher sleep quality.

01:47:51.000 Look, for me, I know for a fact it helps for a fact.

01:47:56.000 For my personal feeling, when I wake up in the morning and I tape my mouth shut, I feel way better.

01:48:01.000 Really?

01:48:02.000 Yeah, like way better.

01:48:03.000 I snore like crazy, but I don't notice it.

01:48:06.000 The only problem is you have a beard.

01:48:07.000 So the tape will slip off with a beard.

01:48:11.000 Maybe I'll just get denture cream and put it on my lips.

01:48:14.000 Do you ever do that?

01:48:15.000 We used to do that people when they were sleeping. 0.69

01:48:17.000 Squeeze your lips together?

01:48:19.000 How do you open them then?

01:48:20.000 Oh, Jesus.

01:48:20.000 Oh, you can't.

01:48:21.000 When people would pass out of Trinity House, we put denture cream on their lips.

01:48:24.000 Oh, boy.

01:48:25.000 And then they wake up like, that's fucking terrifying.

01:48:28.000 That's terrible.

01:48:28.000 That's too much.

01:48:30.000 I'm still kind of stuck.

01:48:31.000 I'm still stuck on this concept that with corporate money, we lose not as much freedom of speech or freedom of opinion.

01:48:40.000 Well, you lose objective reality from people that are supposed to be giving you information, right?

01:48:46.000 So they're not giving you reality.

01:48:48.000 What they're giving you is a filtered narrative that has been promoted by major corporations that have a vested interest in profiting off of this narrative being pushed forward.

01:48:59.000 Like, if you don't get the vaccine, you're going to die, right?

01:49:03.000 That was a big one.

01:49:03.000 Yeah.

01:49:04.000 And that was why they attacked me.

01:49:06.000 Why they attacked me is because I showed that there's something different.

01:49:09.000 Like, oh, look at this healthy guy who's in his 50s that's really obsessed with health, works out every day, and look how quick he got over COVID.

01:49:17.000 Well, this isn't this thing that we're pretending it is.

01:49:20.000 We're pretending it's a plague.

01:49:21.000 It's not.

01:49:22.000 It's like a bad flu.

01:49:24.000 And again, for me, it was like, and look, I've done this for, like I said, I did it for a lot of people, but just IV vitamins.

01:49:31.000 I've sent people to people.

01:49:32.000 I did it for Bill Burr.

01:49:33.000 Bill Burr was here and he was sick and he was coughing.

01:49:36.000 And this is like long after the pandemic.

01:49:38.000 It's like 2024.

01:49:40.000 And he was doing a show and I came to visit him.

01:49:41.000 He's like, I can't get over this cold.

01:49:42.000 I go, listen to me.

01:49:44.000 I go, I'm going to give you this number.

01:49:45.000 I'm going to give you these people.

01:49:46.000 You're going to get a hold of them and schedule an IV mega dose vitamin trip.

01:49:51.000 You want high doses of vitamin B. You want high doses of D, you want high doses of C and zinc.

01:49:59.000 You want all those things together, and I guarantee you, you're going to be fine.

01:50:02.000 So he was sick for weeks.

01:50:04.000 He couldn't get over this fucking cough.

01:50:06.000 He calls me like a day later.

01:50:08.000 He goes, Dude, I can't fucking believe how good I feel.

01:50:11.000 He goes, Dr. Joe Rogan, I'm calling you every time I have a problem with this again.

01:50:15.000 And look, I did the same thing for Dana White.

01:50:17.000 When Dana White had COVID, he threw some eucalyptus on the rocks in his sauna and he couldn't smell it.

01:50:24.000 And he goes, Oh my God, I got COVID.

01:50:26.000 He goes, The first thing I did is call Joe Rogan.

01:50:28.000 He called me up and I said, I'll set you up.

01:50:30.000 We're going to get you monoclonal antibodies.

01:50:32.000 We're going to get you this.

01:50:33.000 We're going to get you that.

01:50:34.000 One day later, he's better.

01:50:34.000 Boom.

01:50:36.000 That's the reality.

01:50:37.000 It's like your body needs tools to let your immune system function at its optimum.

01:50:43.000 And one of the best tools is nutrients.

01:50:46.000 Vitamin D is amazing for your immune system.

01:50:50.000 And it's not just a vitamin, it's a hormone.

01:50:52.000 And it's a hormone that we don't get because we're not in the sun enough.

01:50:55.000 That's where the best way to get vitamin D is sunlight.

01:50:58.000 The second best way is supplementation.

01:51:01.000 And it's really easy.

01:51:02.000 He just takes vitamin D supplements, take it with K2, which makes it absorb better.

01:51:08.000 And I take it also again with magnesium and do that.

01:51:11.000 And I also took zinc with an ionophore.

01:51:19.000 Quercetin.

01:51:20.000 So I take zinc with quercetin.

01:51:22.000 Quercetin aids in the zinc absorption in your body.

01:51:26.000 I take all these different things.

01:51:27.000 But I also like, I'm on the ball.

01:51:29.000 I know what I'm doing.

01:51:30.000 But they didn't say that.

01:51:33.000 They said he's taking horse D-wormer because they were trying to shame me and they were trying to make it look like I was a fool.

01:51:39.000 And they were trying to turn all these people that were terrified about dying from this plague against me.

01:51:44.000 Is that what's happening?

01:51:45.000 I mean, I'm a little obsessed lately, you know, at like the money behind podcasting and podcasting kind of changing.

01:51:53.000 You know, like podcasting has gotten a little more corporate where I feel.

01:51:58.000 I don't know if you see it.

01:51:59.000 In what way?

01:52:00.000 Well, it's like, I mean, I looked at the Golden Globes and who was nominated.

01:52:03.000 And those were all, I mean, I think they're all, you know, corporate, corporate podcasts.

01:52:08.000 Yeah, let me let me help with that.

01:52:10.000 A lot of people say, why wasn't Joe Rogan nominated for the Golden Globes?

01:52:10.000 So here's the thing.

01:52:13.000 And like, why did you know Amy Poehler went?

01:52:16.000 I didn't submit.

01:52:20.000 So they asked me to submit to be nominated for the Golden Globes, and you had to pay $500.

01:52:26.000 And the $500 is like for paperwork or whatever.

01:52:29.000 I said, no.

01:52:31.000 I go, I don't care.

01:52:32.000 I already won.

01:52:33.000 Like, you can't tell me I didn't win.

01:52:34.000 I've been number one for six years in a row.

01:52:36.000 All of a sudden, you're going to have a contest in front of all these people wearing tuxedos, and you're going to say, Now I'm not number one.

01:52:41.000 Like, fuck off.

01:52:42.000 You can't, like, I don't care that I'm number one, but I am, in fact, number one.

01:52:42.000 Yeah.

01:52:48.000 So if all of a sudden you have a contest to decide who's really number one amongst us, like, that's amongst you.

01:52:54.000 You're allowed to have your opinion.

01:52:55.000 You like Amy Poehler better than me?

01:52:57.000 That's great.

01:52:58.000 Oh, that's fucking funny, Joe.

01:53:00.000 Do you know how many people have been like ride or die for you?

01:53:04.000 Like, the fact that Joe Rogan didn't win, the fact that, and I've heard that so much that it's so funny you just didn't submit.

01:53:12.000 Yeah, they asked me to.

01:53:14.000 Yeah, it was like one of like six candidates.

01:53:18.000 They took the top people.

01:53:19.000 They basically just took the top people of the charts, but which, you know, it's fine.

01:53:24.000 First of all, Amy Poehar's podcast is pretty good.

01:53:26.000 I haven't seen it.

01:53:26.000 It's pretty good.

01:53:27.000 I'm sure it's good.

01:53:28.000 I'm sure someone must love it.

01:53:28.000 It won.

01:53:30.000 It's really good.

01:53:31.000 They would give it to someone else, right?

01:53:32.000 Max is really good.

01:53:33.000 Like, there's some great podcasts.

01:53:34.000 I don't know who was even nominated.

01:53:36.000 I don't even know who was in.

01:53:37.000 I just know that Amy Poehler won and a lot of people were upset.

01:53:39.000 She said a podcast for six months and she won.

01:53:42.000 Great.

01:53:42.000 You gave it to a famous person.

01:53:44.000 Which, you know, in that world, that's what they do.

01:53:48.000 They give it to a person that, like, is going to – look, you give it to Amy Poehler amongst their circles.

01:53:53.000 It's not going to have any criticism.

01:53:54.000 Look, there's a lot of really good fucking podcasts.

01:53:57.000 There's some great ones.

01:53:57.000 I don't know if amongst her group, if I listened to all of them, I would decide that hers is number one.

01:54:02.000 But I just know that I didn't submit.

01:54:04.000 I don't want to be a part of that.

01:54:06.000 I don't care.

01:54:07.000 You're just a group of people that just decide all of a sudden that you're going to give an award out.

01:54:12.000 You got a trophy?

01:54:14.000 Fuck off.

01:54:15.000 Dude, this, okay.

01:54:19.000 Like, so when we did the show and everyone's like, are you looking for a season two?

01:54:23.000 And I obviously that would be great.

01:54:24.000 But you know what I said to Leanne the day after it came out?

01:54:28.000 I said, I think I already won.

01:54:30.000 I think I like I got everything I wanted.

01:54:32.000 I did something I'm proud of.

01:54:34.000 And people are responding to it.

01:54:35.000 People like the texts I get are people that will never promote it on their show.

01:54:39.000 Ron White loves it.

01:54:40.000 Ron loved it.

01:54:41.000 When Ron came in last night and the first thing he said to me was, I watched your show.

01:54:47.000 I watched every fucking episode.

01:54:48.000 Yeah, he binged it.

01:54:49.000 He binged it with his girlfriend.

01:54:51.000 I was like, Joe, you know how I feel about Ron.

01:54:53.000 I'll get emotional.

01:54:54.000 He's like, and Ron's not a bullshit artist.

01:54:56.000 If Ron loved it, he loved it.

01:54:56.000 He's not.

01:54:58.000 And he came in and he was ranting and raving about it.

01:55:00.000 That's all you need.

01:55:01.000 Just do your best.

01:55:02.000 All these awards and all this shit.

01:55:04.000 Awards for art are crazy.

01:55:06.000 It's insane because it's not, it shouldn't be a competition.

01:55:09.000 Well, it's also so subjective.

01:55:11.000 There is music that like my daughter loves.

01:55:15.000 It is her favorite music.

01:55:16.000 But she's a 15-year-old girl.

01:55:20.000 I can't say it sucks because it doesn't suck.

01:55:23.000 It's just not for me.

01:55:25.000 You know what I mean?

01:55:25.000 Yeah.

01:55:26.000 It's like, that's why awards for art are crazy.

01:55:29.000 Like, this is the best.

01:55:31.000 Like, to who?

01:55:33.000 To a group of fucking people that we deem the gatekeepers of all that's appropriate?

01:55:38.000 So when did you come?

01:55:39.000 Because, you know, I'm always fascinated by you.

01:55:42.000 Did you care about ratings when you were on news radio?

01:55:45.000 Oh, no.

01:55:46.000 Well, the news radio thing was hilarious.

01:55:49.000 Because that's one that I can say, for people that haven't watched it, I would say, binge that show.

01:55:54.000 It was such an amazing piece of art.

01:55:58.000 We would say.

01:55:58.000 But always, and respectfully, always in the losing category.

01:56:02.000 Like never.

01:56:03.000 Always.

01:56:03.000 Always in the losing category.

01:56:05.000 My friend Lou, he was one of the writers on news radio.

01:56:08.000 And he would show up for the table read with a t-shirt that had the number of our rating on it.

01:56:14.000 And one day he showed up and the number was 88.

01:56:17.000 And I was like, 88?

01:56:18.000 He's like, I'm like, fuck.

01:56:22.000 I was like, God, because we got moved nine times over the course of five years.

01:56:26.000 Like, I remember, like, one of the things that just like social media poisons people, back then, it was Variety and the Hollywood Reporter.

01:56:35.000 So all of the cast would be sitting around reading variety about how good Sex in the City was doing and the single guy.

01:56:42.000 And, you know, because they would sandwich them in between Friends and Seinfeld.

01:56:46.000 And, you know, Paul Sims, the producer of news radio, would call it a shit sandwich because you would have these two really good shows in between these shows that were not that good.

01:56:54.000 They would call it Caroline and the shitty.

01:56:56.000 And like everybody was upset.

01:56:58.000 And so they would read these things in variety.

01:57:02.000 They'd look at the ratings and they'd get all upset and start getting pissed off.

01:57:06.000 And that show sucks.

01:57:07.000 Why is that show doing so well?

01:57:08.000 Why aren't we on Thursday night?

01:57:10.000 And I remember saying, oh, last time I checked, I'm on TV.

01:57:14.000 I go, do you know we're on a TV show?

01:57:16.000 Do you know how few people get to be on a sitcom?

01:57:18.000 I go, yeah, we're not number one.

01:57:20.000 Well, good.

01:57:20.000 Then no one knows who we are and we get to be on TV and we get to have fun.

01:57:24.000 And some people enjoy it.

01:57:26.000 We're making so much money.

01:57:27.000 Like, how can you be upset?

01:57:29.000 We could not be on TV.

01:57:31.000 Like, yeah, we're not number one.

01:57:32.000 Yeah, we have a really good show that's not being recognized.

01:57:34.000 It eventually was recognized when it went to syndication.

01:57:37.000 So news radio really only got popular in syndication.

01:57:40.000 Oh, when it was on AE, buddy, I don't think I've ever enjoyed a TV show.

01:57:46.000 Out of every TV show I've ever watched, and I was late to friends.

01:57:49.000 Look, it was no Game of Thrones, or even Queen of Dragons, whatever the fuck, the other one, House of Dragons.

01:57:54.000 That's a pretty good show, too.

01:57:54.000 Yeah.

01:57:56.000 But when I discovered news radio, I was like, you guys had every character.

01:58:03.000 Like, it was not just one character.

01:58:06.000 It was five different.

01:58:09.000 Yeah, I'm back.

01:58:09.000 Are we back?

01:58:10.000 We're back.

01:58:10.000 Okay.

01:58:11.000 We've been having this problem where we crash a couple hours into a podcast.

01:58:15.000 But it was such you, it was five personalities, six personalities all working in union at different speeds.

01:58:26.000 It was such a fucking great show.

01:58:26.000 It was really good.

01:58:28.000 Paul Sims came from the Larry Sanders show.

01:58:30.000 So he was really good, you know, and he was just a brilliant guy.

01:58:33.000 And the writers were amazing and the cast was amazing.

01:58:36.000 But it was the perfect scenario.

01:58:38.000 So we went through it without everyone getting famous.

01:58:41.000 We put together a great show and then we fucking sailed off into the sunset.

01:58:45.000 It was perfect for me because I never wanted to do it again once it was over.

01:58:48.000 For real?

01:58:49.000 Yeah, I didn't.

01:58:50.000 I mean, I took a few development deals afterwards just because I wanted the money.

01:58:54.000 And I thought, maybe I'll make my own show and it'll be good.

01:58:56.000 But ugh, working with these writers and like some of these writing teams was really interesting.

01:59:02.000 Writing teams are generally one brilliant guy and then the other guy who writes things down.

01:59:07.000 And then they both get deals.

01:59:10.000 And then I would wind up with the guy who wrote things down.

01:59:13.000 So I got one of these writers who was a writing team on Seinfeld and the team broke up.

01:59:17.000 And then I got this guy and he wrote this fucking script that was so bad.

01:59:21.000 It was so bad.

01:59:22.000 I couldn't believe how bad it was.

01:59:24.000 I was like, and then they were trying to pretend they're excited about it.

01:59:27.000 I go, did you read it?

01:59:28.000 This is fucking terrible.

01:59:30.000 Because the problem was I had come from News Radio, which was a really good show.

01:59:34.000 And most of these shows are terrible.

01:59:36.000 And most of the guys that I knew that were doing terrible sitcoms were living in hell because they were doing these like corny ass.

01:59:43.000 And all they wanted to do is like figure out a way to make themselves feel better.

01:59:46.000 So they spend money or they party.

01:59:48.000 And that's what they were doing.

01:59:49.000 They were all just partying and spending money and not enjoying their work.

01:59:52.000 Their work was terrible.

01:59:54.000 It was hell.

01:59:55.000 So I kind of realized early on that this trap of like chasing the number one ratings and all that shit, it was just stupid.

02:00:04.000 It was just nonsense.

02:00:06.000 And then, you know, Fear Factor was number one for a while.

02:00:08.000 I think.

02:00:09.000 I think it was.

02:00:10.000 It was hugely popular, whatever it was.

02:00:12.000 And that was weird, too.

02:00:13.000 It was like, well, that's also strange now that people want to talk about it.

02:00:17.000 Everybody, it was just like this thing that was everywhere.

02:00:20.000 It was very strange.

02:00:21.000 This is how you can tell how big a show is.

02:00:22.000 Tell me if I'm wrong.

02:00:23.000 I can remember what night it aired on Monday nights.

02:00:27.000 Fear Factor?

02:00:28.000 Was it Monday nights?

02:00:29.000 I don't remember.

02:00:30.000 I think it was Monday.

02:00:31.000 I don't remember.

02:00:32.000 I remember the Fresh Prince of Bel Air was Monday nights.

02:00:36.000 I remember Seinfeld was Thursdays, right?

02:00:39.000 Yeah.

02:00:40.000 That's the thing about TV Now, which is so bizarre, is like when I pitched this show, have you seen Slow Horses?

02:00:50.000 Yes, I love it.

02:00:51.000 So when I went to Netflix, they were like, we want to do a show with you.

02:00:54.000 I was like, great.

02:00:55.000 And they're like, what's the show?

02:00:56.000 I said, it's my family.

02:00:57.000 I'm Burt Kreischer, Georgia and Isla, Leanne.

02:01:00.000 I'm a comedian.

02:01:01.000 I'm me.

02:01:03.000 Everything's the same.

02:01:03.000 Nothing changes.

02:01:04.000 I don't have a job.

02:01:05.000 I'm this guy.

02:01:06.000 And they're like, okay.

02:01:07.000 I go, but it's meet slow horses.

02:01:10.000 And they're like, what the fuck are you talking about?

02:01:12.000 I said, all I can tell you is I don't want to do episodic.

02:01:15.000 I want slow horses.

02:01:16.000 I said, when I watch slow horse, and this is why Ron's compliment was so kind, because I created the show so that me, Jared, and Andy, I should be able to do it.

02:01:24.000 Explain slow horses.

02:01:25.000 Slow horses is Gary Oldman.

02:01:27.000 It is a spy thriller.

02:01:28.000 They're a group of like low-grade spies that all kind of got put into an office off to the side, but they don't realize how important their office still is.

02:01:37.000 They're still very ingrained in all the shit that the big office is doing, but they're the B team.

02:01:42.000 And so the big office is constantly fucking with the little office.

02:01:45.000 So how is your show like Slow Horses?

02:01:48.000 The day I watched Slow Horse, I watched Slow Horses the week before I went in for this meeting, and I watched the first episode of Slow Horses.

02:01:55.000 And at the very end of that first episode, I hit pause.

02:01:58.000 I looked at Leanne.

02:01:59.000 I said, We're watching every fucking episode until it's over.

02:02:02.000 Right now, we're not moving.

02:02:03.000 We're going to watch all of them.

02:02:04.000 And I did that with that and Black Doves.

02:02:06.000 And I said to Netflix, I said, I want to make this where that first episode, it's not episodic.

02:02:11.000 The Chrysler's got a horse.

02:02:12.000 The Chrysler's got a dog.

02:02:13.000 It all goes together.

02:02:14.000 I go, the first episode, at that last line, I say, the very last line of that first episode, I want you to look at the person you're with and go, I'm watching all fucking six.

02:02:23.000 And so it's an arc.

02:02:25.000 It's a six-story arc.

02:02:26.000 It's basically a two-hour and 30-minute movie that you can stop at any point.

02:02:32.000 And the compliment I've been getting is the one Ron gave me.

02:02:34.000 It's like, I binged it.

02:02:35.000 I watched all of it.

02:02:36.000 That's great.

02:02:37.000 That's a smart move for a comedy to do it like that.

02:02:40.000 Like it's one big story.

02:02:42.000 That last.

02:02:43.000 Black Doves is great too.

02:02:44.000 Black Doves. 0.98

02:02:45.000 Great.

02:02:46.000 Black Doves. 0.98

02:02:48.000 When we did the premiere in LA, Netflix came up to me and shout out to Netflix.

02:02:53.000 And they were like, you know, when you pitched this, we had no idea what you were fucking selling us.

02:02:57.000 Like when you said black doves and slow horses, like that, those were your comps.

02:03:02.000 And then they were like, we watched that first episode and they're like, you fucking did it.

02:03:05.000 Like you made a show where at that very end of that first episode, at that moment, and the very beginning of the second episode, I have a joke about you.

02:03:13.000 But I thought I'd throw one in.

02:03:15.000 You gave me a little love in your special.

02:03:16.000 I'd give me a little love back.

02:03:18.000 And so at the very end of that first episode, I wanted it so that you go, oh, this guy's fucked.

02:03:23.000 I got to see how he gets out of this.

02:03:26.000 And that's the compliment I've been getting from people is that they watched all of them.

02:03:31.000 They binged it.

02:03:32.000 And that's like, it's like, because, you know, you try to do something a little different.

02:03:37.000 And that's why when you said that, you didn't submit, I fucking connected so hard because I was like, I don't need it to be, it's not going to be the number one show on Netflix.

02:03:48.000 It's never going to be the greatest show they ever made.

02:03:50.000 There's too many good shows.

02:03:52.000 But the fact that people have liked it, I go, I think I won.

02:03:55.000 I think I got the thing I wanted.

02:03:57.000 It was just like, I got to tech.

02:03:57.000 Yeah.

02:03:59.000 I got to text.

02:04:00.000 I got him to share this.

02:04:01.000 And I apologize, Luke, if this sounds weird.

02:04:03.000 Luke Combs texted me last night.

02:04:05.000 Now, he's not like a, he's, you know, he's not a social media guy.

02:04:09.000 He just texted me.

02:04:09.000 He's like, dude, I just watched your entire show.

02:04:11.000 Luke Colms.

02:04:12.000 And I'm like, he's cool as fuck.

02:04:14.000 He's cool.

02:04:14.000 I've hung out with that dude a few times.

02:04:16.000 As fuck, and he's understated.

02:04:17.000 He's the guy.

02:04:18.000 He's fascinating to me because he's a guy.

02:04:20.000 We just did a podcast.

02:04:21.000 He's a guy that he goes into the room and he's not going to talk to anyone because he doesn't want to bother you.

02:04:26.000 He's one of the biggest stars in country music.

02:04:28.000 He's one of the most talented guys.

02:04:29.000 He's very humble.

02:04:30.000 And he's very humble.

02:04:31.000 And he's like, I did the CMAs and I saw him and he just, he stays to himself.

02:04:35.000 He doesn't.

02:04:36.000 And I was like, wow, what a slick dude.

02:04:38.000 And he's like, no, I'm not trying to be slick.

02:04:39.000 I just don't want to bother anybody.

02:04:41.000 And so when Luke Combs texted me last night, I fucking, I texted Leanne.

02:04:46.000 I was like, can you believe, like, that's not the guy you think.

02:04:49.000 Right.

02:04:50.000 It's a real compliment, not from like a cheesy ass kisser.

02:04:54.000 He's a real dude.

02:04:55.000 He really, you know, he's not lying.

02:04:56.000 Right, right.

02:04:57.000 He really liked it.

02:04:58.000 The first person to text was Chris DeStefano.

02:05:00.000 And that's a real one.

02:05:01.000 He's like, dude, you're a good actor.

02:05:04.000 This is a great series.

02:05:05.000 That was the very first text I got.

02:05:07.000 And I was like, comics don't have to text.

02:05:09.000 They don't.

02:05:09.000 We don't.

02:05:10.000 Like, I texted Shane when I saw Tires because it's fucking, it was, it was a game changer.

02:05:15.000 I was like, this is fucking incredible, whatever.

02:05:17.000 But when a comic text, you're like, that's okay.

02:05:21.000 Like, I didn't expect you to watch it.

02:05:23.000 But Luke Combs fucking floored me.

02:05:25.000 Luke Clombs and Bradley Cooper was another one.

02:05:28.000 That's awesome.

02:05:29.000 Just do something that you enjoy and do your best at it.

02:05:33.000 This idea of awards.

02:05:34.000 Yeah.

02:05:35.000 Like, fuck off.

02:05:36.000 Fuck off with your awards.

02:05:38.000 Like, it's like, there's so many moments in history have been defined by these like goofy ass awards.

02:05:44.000 Yeah.

02:05:44.000 Like, what?

02:05:45.000 What is that?

02:05:47.000 The only thing that's good is that, like, if something wins an Academy Award for best movie, I go, ooh, maybe I'll see it.

02:05:52.000 Like, occasionally.

02:05:53.000 But you know what's better than that?

02:05:55.000 One of my friends saying it's great.

02:05:56.000 Dude.

02:05:57.000 You know, and or someone posting on social media, like, oh, this fucking, someone that I respect on social media posting it and saying, hey, you need to watch this.

02:06:04.000 This is amazing.

02:06:05.000 Do you ever see the movie American Movie?

02:06:05.000 Dude.

02:06:05.000 Great.

02:06:08.000 What is that?

02:06:08.000 It's about the two guys in Wisconsin trying to make a horror film called Coven.

02:06:13.000 God, I think I did.

02:06:14.000 Is it a long time ago?

02:06:15.000 Long time ago.

02:06:16.000 Documentary.

02:06:17.000 And one guy's done way too much acid.

02:06:20.000 And it's just, it's like one of those movies where someone says to you, you have to see this.

02:06:25.000 And it's never going to win an award.

02:06:27.000 Probably made no money.

02:06:29.000 But it is the most fascinating.

02:06:31.000 Jamie, can you pull the trailer up for that?

02:06:33.000 If you see this, you'll go, I've saw it.

02:06:35.000 Okay.

02:06:36.000 It's the American movie, Mike.

02:06:38.000 Oh, what was the other guy's?

02:06:40.000 Oh, this is so good, Joe.

02:06:42.000 Imagine a world where passion and perseverance outweigh polish, and dreams are both the driving force and the destination. 1.00

02:06:50.000 What if I told you this world exists, not in some far-flung fantasy, but here in the heartland of America?

02:06:57.000 This world is seen through the lens of an unsung documentary where we meet Mark Beauchart.

02:07:02.000 This is the trailer.

02:07:05.000 This is okay.

02:07:07.000 No, I didn't see this.

02:07:08.000 Joe, this movie is so good.

02:07:13.000 But it's one of those things that it's like when you find something that you just fall in love with, like, like that you can't explain to someone.

02:07:21.000 Like Vernon, Florida.

02:07:22.000 Have you ever seen Vernon Florida?

02:07:24.000 No.

02:07:24.000 It's a documentary by Werner Herzog about it was trying to him and another guy, another guy did it.

02:07:29.000 He was trying to do a documentary called Nub City, right?

02:07:32.000 It was about this place in Florida where a lot of people had lost limbs and were collecting insurance money.

02:07:37.000 And he went in to do a documentary about that, and he got his life threatened, but he had all this footage.

02:07:44.000 So I think Werner Herzog came in and dumped a little money in it, and he just made the bizarrest documentary about a guy talking about turkey hunting and another guy talking about like it's like four different personalities, Joe.

02:07:58.000 It's on YouTube.

02:07:59.000 You can find it.

02:08:00.000 Werner Herzog does some amazing shit.

02:08:02.000 Amazing shit.

02:08:03.000 This thing, Joe, is like something you start watching and you go, I can't turn it off.

02:08:08.000 I mean, he did Grizzly Man.

02:08:11.000 He did fucking, what is that other one?

02:08:14.000 The one about the cave paintings in France.

02:08:18.000 He did.

02:08:19.000 It was made by Errol Morris.

02:08:20.000 Errol Morris.

02:08:21.000 It wasn't Werner Herzog.

02:08:22.000 No, no, he's trying to highlight on there.

02:08:24.000 It says it's an Errol Morris film.

02:08:25.000 Oh, so it's not Werner Herzog.

02:08:26.000 No, Werner Herzog backed it.

02:08:28.000 He was on the page for it.

02:08:29.000 I see.

02:08:30.000 He produced it.

02:08:31.000 He was also, Werner Herzog was a part of that movie, Happy People.

02:08:35.000 You ever see that?

02:08:36.000 No, it's not.

02:08:36.000 Oh, my God.

02:08:37.000 It's about these people that live in Siberia.

02:08:39.000 These guys that live in a small village in Siberia, and they're just fishermen and trappers and hunters.

02:08:45.000 And they basically just live off the land and they're so happy.

02:08:50.000 There's like no mental illness.

02:08:52.000 Everybody works really hard.

02:08:54.000 It's freezing cold at night.

02:08:55.000 They're always drinking and everyone's happy.

02:08:58.000 And it's called Happy People, Life in the Taiga.

02:09:00.000 A great documentary because it just shows you that, like without struggle, you will create struggle.

02:09:06.000 And when you have struggle all the time, like physical struggle, people seem to be satisfied and happy, especially when they're living off the land, living like a subsistence lifestyle, they're out in the forest, they're catching fish and it's it's a great documentary.

02:09:20.000 It's really interesting.

02:09:21.000 Did you feel it?

02:09:22.000 Because I remember we went to a birthday party at your house and your wife introduced my girls and Lean to chickens and lean and the girls immediately got chickens.

02:09:31.000 Chickens are awesome. 0.95

02:09:32.000 The happiest my family was out of all the times we've been happy was when they were they had a garden and they were raising chickens.

02:09:39.000 Yeah, it's good for you, man.

02:09:40.000 And then that like extra, like, did you guys clean out the chicken coop?

02:09:44.000 You need to clean like that little work. 0.93

02:09:46.000 Yeah.

02:09:47.000 Work's good for you.

02:09:48.000 Yeah.

02:09:48.000 Especially work that pays off.

02:09:50.000 Like you actually get eggs and you get to eat those eggs.

02:09:52.000 Those eggs.

02:09:53.000 And that's like the most karma-free food that you'll ever get because they're your pets.

02:09:57.000 Like you treat them well, you feed them.

02:09:59.000 You're like, hey, girls.

02:10:00.000 I talk to them.

02:10:00.000 I see them.

02:10:02.000 I lift rocks for them so they go under the rocks and pick out bugs and worms and shit.

02:10:07.000 And they come near you.

02:10:08.000 They like waddle over to you and you like get, you ready?

02:10:11.000 You ready?

02:10:12.000 You pick up the rock and they immediately go in there and try to get the worms and bugs and shit.

02:10:16.000 And then you get these delicious, healthy eggs.

02:10:18.000 Best eggs I've ever had in my entire life.

02:10:20.000 Yellow.

02:10:21.000 Yellow.

02:10:22.000 I remember getting orange.

02:10:22.000 Double.

02:10:24.000 Do you remember double yolks?

02:10:25.000 Do you get double yolks?

02:10:26.000 Yeah.

02:10:27.000 But you know exactly how they're raised.

02:10:30.000 There's no cruelty involved.

02:10:32.000 You know how they're fed.

02:10:33.000 They lay an egg every day.

02:10:34.000 That egg is never going to become a chicken.

02:10:37.000 That's what I tell all my friends that are like vegetarians that are doing it for like they're just kind people.

02:10:43.000 They don't want an animal to die.

02:10:44.000 I'm like, you don't have to kill an animal.

02:10:46.000 Just eat eggs.

02:10:46.000 Eggs have all the nutrients you need.

02:10:48.000 Eat the yolk, eat the whole thing, and you'll be super healthy.

02:10:53.000 Like you can get all the animal protein that you need from eggs, and you don't ever have to worry about an animal dying.

02:10:58.000 So wait, do you think then when you talk about, what was that, happy city?

02:11:01.000 Is it happy people?

02:11:02.000 Happy people.

02:11:03.000 Do you think your connection then to crushing it in the gym and killing it in the gym is directly connected to that struggle drive?

02:11:11.000 Like the happiest I ever am is the second my workout's done and I lay back and I just sweat.

02:11:17.000 You did it.

02:11:18.000 Oh.

02:11:18.000 Yeah, you did it.

02:11:19.000 Your body needs.

02:11:20.000 I think in order for your body to survive, like when we were hunter-gatherers, you had to do a bunch of work.

02:11:28.000 So I think there's human reward systems that are built in us that if you don't meet those requirements, your body gets anxious.

02:11:35.000 And the most anxiety-ridden, fucked up, mentally ill people I know are these lazy slobs that are online all day complaining about people, especially comics. 0.87

02:11:47.000 I know so many comics that they spend a giant chunk of their day shitting on other comics and they're all fat and lazy.

02:11:53.000 And what is that?

02:11:54.000 Well, it's because they're not healthy.

02:11:56.000 They're not mentally healthy, physically healthy.

02:11:59.000 And so they're completely obsessed with other things, external things.

02:12:03.000 You know, when we did that sober October challenge, Tommy said it best because he was like, dude, when you work out, when we're all competing against each other to see who got the highest fitness scores, Tommy said it best, like when you work out all day, it kills all that internal chatter.

02:12:19.000 Like you don't worry about things anymore.

02:12:20.000 Oh, that what about this?

02:12:21.000 What about that?

02:12:22.000 That what about this?

02:12:23.000 What about that shit?

02:12:24.000 Is your mind thinking there's threats out there in the world?

02:12:28.000 Because there used to be.

02:12:30.000 Because you're programmed to think about like what's out there?

02:12:33.000 What's coming from me?

02:12:34.000 Is there a neighboring tribe that's coming over the top of the hill?

02:12:37.000 Where am I going to get my food?

02:12:38.000 There's all that stuff built in as a human reward system.

02:12:41.000 If you don't meet that human reward system, you're just doom scrolling on TikTok and Twitter all day and shitting on people like, fuck Whitney Cummings and Miss Rachel.

02:12:53.000 They're just mentally ill slobs, all of them. 0.99

02:12:57.000 And their opinion should be dismissed.

02:12:59.000 That's why the idea of awards is so ridiculous.

02:13:02.000 Who are these people that are giving you awards?

02:13:04.000 They're all unhealthy people for the most part.

02:13:07.000 They're all weirdos that are caught up in this fucking bizarre, strange industry that rewards groupthink.

02:13:15.000 Like, fuck off.

02:13:17.000 Yeah.

02:13:18.000 That's probably the happiest my mind was when we had the year we had the straps.

02:13:25.000 Remember we had we were a member of that Kansas City workout club or something.

02:13:29.000 Yeah, we had to become yeah, the my zone, the my zone fitness straps.

02:13:33.000 Yeah.

02:13:34.000 And I remember, I mean, I, you know, like you have memories in your head where you like you drive by a place and you go, I remember that.

02:13:41.000 And it was one night I said I was going to run a marathon and you're like, I'll match it.

02:13:47.000 I remember we were all texting and I remember getting up at like, it was like, put the girls to bed.

02:13:52.000 It's 9 o'clock at night.

02:13:53.000 And I go, I'm going to run until midnight.

02:13:56.000 And I had just this one fucking mile loop and I ran eight miles that night and I just kept running.

02:14:01.000 And I cannot run down fucking Colfax.

02:14:04.000 I can't drive down Colfax without thinking of me just going, one more lap.

02:14:08.000 Just one more lap.

02:14:09.000 Yeah.

02:14:11.000 Those were fucking. 0.89

02:14:12.000 Wearing yourself out is good for your brain, man.

02:14:14.000 It's really good for your brain.

02:14:16.000 I don't think we should do that again because the problem with that is that lit up that weird part of my brain, that obsessive part of my brain.

02:14:23.000 And my wife asked me never to do that again.

02:14:27.000 Because I was like super serious.

02:14:29.000 I got like really into it.

02:14:31.000 And it just became an obsession.

02:14:35.000 It's a dangerous part of my own brain that I can't entertain too much.

02:14:40.000 Because I think that's the part of my brain that was formulated in my competition days where it was like my thought was, you know, like I would go to the, because I had keys to the school.

02:14:51.000 So I'd go and train at 2 o'clock in the morning because I knew nobody else was.

02:14:54.000 I knew everybody else was asleep.

02:14:56.000 I'd drive there by myself and unlock the doors and start training at 2 o'clock in the morning because I knew everybody was asleep.

02:14:56.000 So I'd go there.

02:15:03.000 That made me feel better.

02:15:04.000 Like, bitch, while you're sleeping, I'm in here. 1.00

02:15:07.000 Where did you put that competitiveness?

02:15:09.000 Because I shelved my competitiveness.

02:15:12.000 I don't have it in comedy.

02:15:13.000 I have a competitiveness with the industry that I felt ignored me at times.

02:15:18.000 Like I want to prove things.

02:15:21.000 Like I did fully loaded because I never got on oddball.

02:15:24.000 And so I created that festival.

02:15:26.000 I remember I was with, we were at the Forest Hills Arena or whatever, the outdoor stadium.

02:15:32.000 Someone's like, wow, this is crazy.

02:15:34.000 And I went, yeah.

02:15:34.000 Can you believe you did this?

02:15:35.000 And they're like, what made you want to do this?

02:15:37.000 I go, because no one would ever invite me.

02:15:40.000 And then they were like, wow, that was more of an answer than we expected.

02:15:43.000 And so there's a competitiveness with me internally, but I was very competitive as an athlete, like unhealthy.

02:15:52.000 And it was gross.

02:15:54.000 How was it gross?

02:15:55.000 Like, what sports?

02:15:57.000 Anything I did.

02:15:58.000 Anything I did.

02:15:59.000 That's Michael Jordan, right?

02:16:00.000 When you're talking about Michael Jordan, he was the most healthy person.

02:16:02.000 Michael Jordan and Kelly Slater, the two ones, Tiger Woods, that I hear about, and I identify with the way their brain works where I go, oh, I have that grossness, where I create scenarios in my head to go, that's it.

02:16:14.000 I'm going to fucking, I'd build up a rivalry with, I have a guy that I think about to this day who played baseball at Tampa Catholic.

02:16:20.000 His name was Israel, and I had a competitive name.

02:16:23.000 The guy didn't even know who the fuck I am.

02:16:24.000 He never knew me.

02:16:25.000 He was a pitcher.

02:16:27.000 And I fucking, and I, and I apologize, Israel, if you're hearing this right now.

02:16:31.000 We were 16, and I had a competitiveness in my head.

02:16:34.000 And my goal was to hit him, to hit a line drive right back in, and he was a pitcher.

02:16:39.000 And he threw inside, and I crushed one off his kneecap, and they pulled him out of the game, and I stood on first base.

02:16:44.000 And I was like, that's how it goes.

02:16:47.000 Israel's 53 years old right now.

02:16:50.000 He drive is to hit him with a line drive.

02:16:50.000 That was my fucking thing.

02:16:52.000 So he's so competitive.

02:16:54.000 And so And when I got into stand-up, maybe because I just saw that so many people were so far beyond me that I was like, well, I'm not playing their game, I guess.

02:17:07.000 So I'm not, I never had a competitiveness in stand-up.

02:17:10.000 Well, you can't.

02:17:12.000 Listen, you could, there's a good place for competitiveness.

02:17:15.000 I mean, I am competitive, no doubt, but I don't think about it in terms of like art.

02:17:21.000 I think my competition with either stand-up or with podcasting is to be the best I can be, to do the best job I can.

02:17:30.000 Like if I have a guy on and he's wants to talk about some science stuff or something like esoteric or I have to read his book or listen to the audio book.

02:17:39.000 I have to read articles.

02:17:40.000 I have to get in.

02:17:41.000 I have to do my best.

02:17:42.000 This guy's going to fly in here from Europe or whatever it is.

02:17:46.000 I have to be ready and I have to be intrigued.

02:17:49.000 And the only reason why I have on the podcast in the first place is because I'm interested in it.

02:17:53.000 So my thing is just do the best that I can.

02:17:57.000 And the way that I could do it the best I can is only talk to people that I want to talk to.

02:18:01.000 Only reach out to people that I'm actually interested in.

02:18:04.000 Only accept invitations of someone that ignites my curiosity.

02:18:07.000 And just only do it that way.

02:18:09.000 Never say, oh, this person would be great because they're famous.

02:18:12.000 Like this is one of the things you see about some of these podcasts that are doing well.

02:18:16.000 All of their guests are famous, right?

02:18:18.000 Which is like a built-in cheat code.

02:18:20.000 Like, let's see what this guy, and I have famous people on all the time.

02:18:23.000 If I think they're interesting, if I want to talk to them.

02:18:26.000 But I pass on a lot of famous people because I'm not interested in them.

02:18:30.000 Or because they were like really heavily pushing the vaccine during the pandemic.

02:18:35.000 I'm like, fuck you forever.

02:18:37.000 Fuck you.

02:18:38.000 There's a few people that have tried to get on.

02:18:40.000 I'm like, no, I would have, before the pandemic, I would have been happy to have you on.

02:18:43.000 But now I'm like, fuck you forever.

02:18:46.000 Who knows how many people you caused to have heart attacks?

02:18:48.000 Who knows how many people you tricked into getting that and they had a stroke?

02:18:51.000 Who knows?

02:18:52.000 Who knows?

02:18:53.000 And they didn't need it, especially the people that already got COVID.

02:18:56.000 You didn't know what you were talking about.

02:18:57.000 And you just bootlicked.

02:18:59.000 You bootlicked for the fucking, for the man. 0.75

02:19:01.000 Like, fuck you.

02:19:03.000 Like, that's it.

02:19:04.000 But other than that, everybody else, it's like, who is it?

02:19:09.000 What do they want to talk about?

02:19:10.000 So I just do my best.

02:19:11.000 You know, I'm competitive when it comes to playing pool, but really the pool, you're playing against yourself.

02:19:17.000 You're playing another person and the other person is.

02:19:20.000 But when you're playing, nobody can block you.

02:19:22.000 Nobody gets in front of you.

02:19:24.000 You're just trying to do your best.

02:19:26.000 So it's all against you.

02:19:28.000 All the competition is against you, which is why I like to work out by myself.

02:19:32.000 I'm playing against me.

02:19:34.000 You know, it's me.

02:19:35.000 It's like it's whatever my inside little inner bitch is. 1.00

02:19:39.000 I'm trying to squash that motherfucker down, beat his ass again, and then he's back again tomorrow.

02:19:44.000 Every time I lift a fucking lid on that cold punch, my inner bitch is like, don't do it. 0.98

02:19:50.000 You don't have to do this.

02:19:51.000 You could not do it and we'll be fine.

02:19:52.000 Like the other day it was 22 degrees outside and I had to break the ice off of the top of the thing because it was like covered in ice.

02:19:58.000 I break the ice off because I could barely lift the lid off the fucking thing.

02:20:03.000 So I had to knock off all the ice and then pick it up and climb on in.

02:20:07.000 I'm like, fuck you.

02:20:09.000 And this is like, it's fuck you to the inner bitch. 1.00

02:20:11.000 Dude, it's like when you said, like, I remember doing an interview with a guy when he was getting like, I got a Netflix special coming out.

02:20:17.000 I'm going to go out on the road for the next couple of weeks.

02:20:18.000 And I was like, couple weeks.

02:20:19.000 A couple weeks.

02:20:20.000 Couple weeks.

02:20:21.000 I'm gone.

02:20:22.000 I'm not home for one month.

02:20:25.000 One month out, I'm in my bus every night doing stand-up.

02:20:28.000 But 18 months out, I'm like obsessive.

02:20:32.000 Yeah.

02:20:33.000 I've got, I'm not shooting my next one until 2027.

02:20:36.000 And I'm obsessive today.

02:20:38.000 Last night I was like, I tried all my new shit.

02:20:40.000 I was like, I got to find out if real people laugh at this.

02:20:43.000 You know, like, I mean, my fans, my fans, I think my fans are willing to give me an inch, you know?

02:20:49.000 Well, they also know you.

02:20:50.000 They know your story.

02:20:51.000 They know all the references.

02:20:53.000 Yeah.

02:20:53.000 But what's crazy to me is like we were, me and you, not, I can't speak for the younger comics, but we were in a time at stand-up when competitiveness was the norm.

02:21:05.000 It was because of TV, though, dude.

02:21:07.000 That was what it was.

02:21:08.000 It was like everybody thought they were competing for a very small amount of slots.

02:21:12.000 And then what happened was the internet came along and we realized that, no, in fact, we're actually an asset to each other because we do each other's podcasts.

02:21:21.000 We hang out with each other, which makes each other better.

02:21:24.000 When we're all on a show together and you're killing and Tom's killing and Ari's killing, the more people are killing, the more we're going to do better because we're going to get excited about it.

02:21:32.000 Yeah.

02:21:33.000 And we'll be inspired.

02:21:34.000 And so we became valuable to each other instead of competitive against each other.

02:21:38.000 And if there was any competition that you were having with your friends, it was actually healthy competition because it just made you try harder.

02:21:46.000 Like if you saw, if Ari went up and did like when Ari did his Jew special, which was fucking incredible, that special was so good.

02:21:52.000 It made so many people get inspired to work on a theme and write and like really try to develop something.

02:21:59.000 Like look at what he did.

02:21:59.000 He just put together this fucking incredible special.

02:22:02.000 Like it was really fucking good.

02:22:04.000 And that kind of competition is healthy competition.

02:22:07.000 It's inspirational.

02:22:09.000 Instead of like saying, I hope that guy gets hit by a bus, fuck him.

02:22:12.000 All these slobs that are on Twitter and they're talking shit about comedians and are angry about comedians, they have one thing in common. 1.00

02:22:20.000 They're almost all failures.

02:22:23.000 They're either failures or they're extremely mediocre.

02:22:27.000 They're in the middle of like mediocrity.

02:22:30.000 No one's got them as their favorite comedian.

02:22:33.000 No one's got them as their favorite podcaster.

02:22:35.000 No one's got them as anything.

02:22:36.000 They just don't do that well.

02:22:37.000 So what do they do?

02:22:38.000 They're attacking people.

02:22:39.000 So their competitiveness is a very unhealthy competitiveness.

02:22:42.000 If their competitiveness was healthy, they would say, well, what is it about this person where she's getting all these comedy specials and she's in front of all these roasts?

02:22:51.000 Why is Nikki Glazer doing so well and I'm not?

02:22:54.000 Instead of hating on Nikki Glazer, you know, but that's not what like a narcissist does.

02:22:59.000 Well, what about me?

02:23:00.000 How come I'm not getting that?

02:23:02.000 So she doesn't talk about sucking cock, that fucking bitch. 1.00

02:23:05.000 And then they get all fucking angry and they start talking shit about her.

02:23:08.000 Meanwhile, she still kills it. 0.73

02:23:09.000 She's still on the road.

02:23:10.000 She's still selling out.

02:23:11.000 She's still getting out there. 0.95

02:23:12.000 Everybody screams and cheers.

02:23:13.000 Why?

02:23:14.000 Because she put in the work. 0.97

02:23:15.000 And if you put in the work and if you looked at yourself and you objectively analyzed what you're doing and said, why is this going well?

02:23:22.000 Why is this not going well?

02:23:23.000 And worked harder, you would be where she is.

02:23:26.000 But you're not.

02:23:27.000 So what are you doing?

02:23:28.000 You're on Twitter every day for 12 hours like a fucking mental patient just shitting on people and getting in arguments and saying mean things.

02:23:36.000 Like you're going to just, it's crabs in a bucket.

02:23:38.000 You're just trying to pull people down that are doing better than you.

02:23:40.000 Where are you going?

02:23:41.000 Get back down here.

02:23:42.000 That's all it is.

02:23:43.000 Yeah.

02:23:44.000 It's unhealthy.

02:23:45.000 That's why you can't read that stuff because you absorb the atmosphere of the people that you surround yourself with.

02:23:52.000 And like it or not, when you're interacting with people on social media, you are surrounding yourself with their thoughts.

02:23:58.000 Yeah.

02:23:59.000 You know, and they're unhealthy people that you would never hang out with in real life.

02:24:02.000 And if you did, if you said, well, why do you think that way?

02:24:05.000 And then they would say something like, that doesn't make any sense.

02:24:07.000 This is why that doesn't make any sense.

02:24:09.000 And they'd be like, and then they would run away and go talk shit about you on social media because they're cowards.

02:24:16.000 So you can't live in a world of cowards and mental ill people. 1.00

02:24:21.000 You can't.

02:24:21.000 It's not good for you.

02:24:23.000 When I started hanging out with the group I'm around now, right?

02:24:28.000 I want to say it was you.

02:24:30.000 You were saying, surround yourself with good people.

02:24:32.000 And I remember reading a quote that week, and I've butchered it.

02:24:38.000 But I said, if enough, you hang out with enough great white sharks, people think you're a great white shark.

02:24:42.000 Like I just like, like, all they see is the fin.

02:24:45.000 Right.

02:24:45.000 And it's like, if I hang out with the best fucking comics in the world, if I surround myself with the best comics in the world, I'm going to have to get better.

02:24:52.000 Yes.

02:24:52.000 Like, I'm going to get better.

02:24:54.000 And I remember, I can tell you, like, the first time I saw your Kim or your Caitlin Jenner joke of the gargoyles.

02:25:01.000 The demon.

02:25:02.000 Yeah, and you're on the stool and you got the stool and the gargoyle.

02:25:05.000 I remember watching that crying, laughing, going, I'm not using the stage at all.

02:25:09.000 Like, I'm not using the stage.

02:25:10.000 Like, goddamn it.

02:25:11.000 Or I remember Burr doing an act out.

02:25:14.000 And I never expected Burr to do an act out.

02:25:16.000 He was talking to an immigrant kid he hired that lived in the bushes or that he adopted.

02:25:20.000 He goes, So and say he's not going to live in the house.

02:25:23.000 We're going to keep in the bushes.

02:25:24.000 He's like, come on, man.

02:25:25.000 There's a reason he's in bushes.

02:25:26.000 But he was doing an act out.

02:25:27.000 And I remember going, like, God damn it, man.

02:25:29.000 I don't ever do act outs.

02:25:30.000 Like, I think I always surrounded myself around better comics to like see what the meal was being made and go like, well, shit, I'm just making french fries.

02:25:40.000 You can turn that into a baked potato.

02:25:41.000 Well, we don't exist in a vacuum.

02:25:44.000 This is one of the things that I always say about comics.

02:25:46.000 You never find the best comic in the country or one of the best comics in the country by themselves in Birmingham, Alabama.

02:25:52.000 No.

02:25:52.000 It doesn't exist.

02:25:53.000 They're always in either New York, LA, Austin.

02:25:57.000 There's a few other places where you find out about someone really good.

02:26:00.000 And they're always around other people that are really good.

02:26:03.000 Because comedy is one of those things where you really only experience it live.

02:26:08.000 Like when you see someone doing a special, specials are great, but a special is like 60% of the real show.

02:26:16.000 If you're there in the audience, you get 100% of the real show.

02:26:19.000 You get hypnotized by the show.

02:26:21.000 You get caught up in it.

02:26:22.000 If the guys got it together, it's like really well pieced and timed and edited.

02:26:27.000 It's so much fun.

02:26:29.000 But you got to be there.

02:26:31.000 And when you're at a club and you see Gillis and Ron White and like we have the mothership, you have all these great comics.

02:26:39.000 Like, man, the atmosphere is just uplifting.

02:26:42.000 Everybody's inspired and exciting.

02:26:44.000 And for people that are listening, like, yeah, that's great for you guys, be fucking famous comedians.

02:26:50.000 You could do this with your friends, whatever you're doing.

02:26:54.000 I don't care what you're doing.

02:26:55.000 Whatever you're doing.

02:26:56.000 If you guys are all pickleball players, just work hard to be the best fucking pickleball player.

02:27:00.000 Hang out with other pickleball players.

02:27:01.000 Talk about pickleball.

02:27:02.000 Get involved in it.

02:27:03.000 Push each other.

02:27:05.000 Tell each other what you're doing that's making you better.

02:27:07.000 Tell each other what are the different things you're doing that's enhancing your recovery or whatever the fuck you're into.

02:27:13.000 Find other people that are also into it.

02:27:16.000 Surround yourself with people that have a similar thing and you all lift each other up.

02:27:20.000 And you need the other voices.

02:27:22.000 Because I think sometimes the best jokes you tell are like you don't realize you're telling a joke.

02:27:28.000 You don't realize it's a bit.

02:27:29.000 And then someone goes, yo, man.

02:27:31.000 Like I remember we were doing a new material night one night and I got off stage and you walked up to me and you go, did you really not know that Helen Kellen and Anne Frank weren't the same person?

02:27:41.000 And I was like, yeah, I used to think they're the same person.

02:27:43.000 Did you, you know what I've been reading?

02:27:44.000 That Helen Keller was a fraud? 0.82

02:27:46.000 Okay, hold on.

02:27:47.000 Let's start here, okay?

02:27:49.000 So, okay.

02:27:51.000 I heard Stevie Wander Cassie. 1.00

02:27:54.000 Okay.

02:27:56.000 And there's footage of him doing seeing guy shit.

02:27:59.000 Like what?

02:28:00.000 Pull it up.

02:28:01.000 There's all sorts of stuff and some very interesting stories people have told too.

02:28:04.000 Shut the fuck up. 1.00

02:28:05.000 Yeah.

02:28:06.000 Like there's a boy.

02:28:07.000 That's a great secret.

02:28:08.000 To keep that secret for so long while you're still alive.

02:28:10.000 Helen Keller's dead and it just leaked out in 2026.

02:28:14.000 Dude, Helen Keller, look at that. 1.00

02:28:16.000 Her doctors were saying that she responded to stimuli, to sound, to visual.

02:28:21.000 And then her writing was apparently all the same grammatical errors and spelling errors that her handler had.

02:28:27.000 This goes back to Cubuche Joe. 0.98

02:28:30.000 It's just like he says to me, you lost everything.

02:28:33.000 You lost everything I saw.

02:28:34.000 And you built it back.

02:28:35.000 And I just, I just TV wondered him.

02:28:37.000 I'm like, yeah, I can't see me.

02:28:38.000 Me and Eddie Bravo were crying, laughing.

02:28:41.000 Because I was on the toilet when he called me.

02:28:43.000 And I'm taking a shit.

02:28:45.000 And he's like, did Burt Crasher lose everything?

02:28:47.000 I'm like, what?

02:28:49.000 What do you mean you said to me?

02:28:51.000 He goes, he was on Shannon Shaw.

02:28:52.000 I go, he didn't lose everything.

02:28:54.000 And I go, I bet Shannon Sharp just said that.

02:28:57.000 And I could see Bert totally just going with it.

02:29:00.000 And we were crying laughing.

02:29:02.000 Eddie and I were crying.

02:29:04.000 Like, why would you go with that?

02:29:06.000 Why wouldn't he just tell you Bert wouldn't?

02:29:09.000 He wouldn't even, but he was like, I don't know, Shannon.

02:29:11.000 I just put myself back up and I just, I hit rock bottom.

02:29:16.000 He never hit rock bottom.

02:29:18.000 He was never even in the middle.

02:29:19.000 He was always doing great.

02:29:21.000 That's what happened to Stevie Wonder. 1.00

02:29:23.000 They were just like, yeah, man, I heard you're blind.

02:29:24.000 He's like, what?

02:29:25.000 And then someone's like, just come on.

02:29:27.000 This can't be real.

02:29:28.000 I swear to God, there's video of Stevie Trump.

02:29:30.000 Ray Charles is blind.

02:29:31.000 Don't kill all my dreams.

02:29:32.000 Ray Charles is really blind.

02:29:34.000 Okay.

02:29:34.000 Stevie Wonder.

02:29:35.000 Got a lot of pussy, too. 1.00

02:29:36.000 Stevie Wonder.

02:29:37.000 Because he didn't care what it looked like.

02:29:37.000 You know why?

02:29:39.000 Fuck.

02:29:40.000 He just came what it felt like.

02:29:41.000 Did you smell good?

02:29:42.000 Do you smell good?

02:29:43.000 Can we fuck?

02:29:44.000 I brought a blind guy on stage one time in Hartford, Connecticut.

02:29:47.000 I was like, he was with a fucking smoking hot chick.

02:29:49.000 He probably didn't even know.

02:29:50.000 And I know, I said, I go, dude, what a waste.

02:29:52.000 And he was like, what?

02:29:53.000 I go, you got a beautiful chick, but you could just, I mean, wouldn't a fat one feel better? 1.00

02:29:57.000 Like, because you're all touch, right?

02:29:59.000 And he goes, no, man, I can feel her face.

02:30:00.000 And I went, what?

02:30:01.000 And he goes, she's gorgeous.

02:30:02.000 And she was.

02:30:03.000 Oh, he could feel her face.

02:30:04.000 This is when I was young and there were no rules in comedy and no one had phones.

02:30:08.000 So I said, hey, man, come up on stage.

02:30:10.000 I want you to feel people in the audience and rate them on a scale of one to 10.

02:30:12.000 Oh, no.

02:30:14.000 Fucking the confidence of these chicks. 1.00

02:30:16.000 I'll do it.

02:30:18.000 Oh, boy.

02:30:19.000 He's like, oh, four.

02:30:19.000 Feels her face.

02:30:21.000 And the crowd was like, this guy's good.

02:30:24.000 He could have worked at a fair, Joe.

02:30:25.000 I mean, he was so fucking good.

02:30:27.000 He was so good.

02:30:28.000 You have to have footage of Stevie Wonder shaking dudes' hands.

02:30:31.000 Come on.

02:30:32.000 There's one where I saw where he comes up on stage and Stevie sticks his hand out to the side and the guy's like, hey, what's up, Stevie?

02:30:38.000 Yeah, but I mean, he would hear people and know that they were to the side of him.

02:30:42.000 I don't know.

02:30:43.000 That's what I heard.

02:30:44.000 But then that's what happened with Helen Keller, is right?

02:30:47.000 The story seems like it was fraud.

02:30:51.000 It seems like she probably was like visually impaired.

02:30:54.000 Okay, when someone attempted to shake hands with Stevie Wonder, pray this.

02:31:00.000 Oh, that's a joke making fun of it.

02:31:02.000 Okay, so not that fun.

02:31:03.000 But I did find.

02:31:03.000 Oh.

02:31:04.000 So there's a bunch of compilations of people like this.

02:31:06.000 This is from Drink Champs.

02:31:07.000 These Stevie Wonder stories keep getting wilder every time.

02:31:11.000 You ever had Drink Champs on?

02:31:12.000 No.

02:31:13.000 Let me hear some of this.

02:31:14.000 Everybody's got Stevie's Not Blind Stories.

02:31:16.000 Stevie Wonder FaceTime is.

02:31:18.000 On everything I love.

02:31:20.000 Stevie Wonder does FaceTime me. 0.96

02:31:22.000 Come on, man.

02:31:24.000 I can't make this shit up.

02:31:26.000 Come on.

02:31:27.000 I was in there chilling with my, I was getting my hair done with my hairstyle.

02:31:30.000 He got my phone and my hairstylist's like, did I say Stevie Wonder?

02:31:34.000 I said, yep.

02:31:35.000 I went boop.

02:31:36.000 And he was like, I've been looking for you.

02:31:41.000 You know, Snoop Dogg says Stevie Wonders FaceTimes him?

02:31:45.000 Yes, Stevie FaceTimes me too.

02:31:49.000 Oh, my God.

02:31:51.000 Oh, my God.

02:31:53.000 Take Stevie to see?

02:31:54.000 Sometimes.

02:31:58.000 Shaq said he rode in the elevator with Stevie and Stevie pressed the button.

02:32:04.000 Shaq said Stevie.

02:32:05.000 We lived in the same building for real.

02:32:07.000 All right, but I just need to describe this story.

02:32:10.000 You can park in front.

02:32:11.000 You can park in front or you can park in the bottom.

02:32:14.000 I'm already in the elevator.

02:32:16.000 So you say Stevie Gobs is called Hodolo.

02:32:18.000 No.

02:32:20.000 But he got on the elevator, though.

02:32:22.000 Okay.

02:32:23.000 And I'm standing in the corner.

02:32:24.000 I don't want to say nothing.

02:32:24.000 I see him.

02:32:25.000 He's like, what up, Diesel?

02:32:29.000 Shaq said he rolled in the elevator with him.

02:32:32.000 He didn't say that he was in there.

02:32:35.000 He just seen Stevie, like they lived in the same building.

02:32:38.000 They both walked in.

02:32:39.000 And Shaq, because he didn't want to say nothing.

02:32:42.000 And Stevie said, when Shaq walked out, all right, later Diesel.

02:32:47.000 Crazy.

02:32:48.000 Yeah.

02:32:48.000 That's crazy.

02:32:49.000 Well, what a great move that would be if he really did it.

02:32:52.000 I think he's blind.

02:32:53.000 No, here's the picture.

02:32:54.000 But what up, Diesel?

02:32:56.000 First of all, the sound that he would make when he walks.

02:32:59.000 Like, the shaq is huge.

02:33:02.000 He's an enormous person.

02:33:03.000 So you'd probably realize there was an enormous man next to you.

02:33:06.000 You'd have to feel it.

02:33:07.000 Right.

02:33:09.000 He probably, maybe he wears the same deodorant or cologne.

02:33:14.000 Because dudes who can't see have amazing sense of smell.

02:33:17.000 Like they people smell differently. 1.00

02:33:19.000 Yeah.

02:33:20.000 You know, like certain people smell different.

02:33:22.000 I guess.

02:33:22.000 I don't notice it because I could see him.

02:33:24.000 But I guess.

02:33:25.000 He does have his own deodorant.

02:33:26.000 Yeah, there you go.

02:33:27.000 No, he has his own deodorant.

02:33:28.000 He's got Shaq's head on it, I think.

02:33:30.000 He probably smelled Shaq's deodorant. 0.87

02:33:32.000 I don't know.

02:33:32.000 I'm just trying to be charitable.

02:33:34.000 This is how I think it happened, right?

02:33:35.000 Stevie Wonder goes on, what, the television show of five?

02:33:38.000 And he's probably hard.

02:33:41.000 He probably can't see.

02:33:42.000 He probably doesn't have 2020 vision.

02:33:43.000 He's probably legally blind, right?

02:33:46.000 And they're legally blind.

02:33:47.000 Legally blind.

02:33:47.000 Like he can see shit, but it's not great vision.

02:33:50.000 And they're like, you know, this is little Stevie.

02:33:53.000 And he's like, what's wrong with his eyes?

02:33:55.000 We can't fucking put his eyes out like that.

02:33:57.000 Give him sunglasses.

02:33:59.000 And then the story got bigger than it was.

02:34:01.000 I will say this.

02:34:02.000 I will say this, okay?

02:34:04.000 I got video of this.

02:34:05.000 This just proves that he might be blind.

02:34:07.000 Okay.

02:34:07.000 Leanne was at a concert the other night.

02:34:10.000 This guy, Corey Henry, is Stevie's favorite pianist.

02:34:12.000 Leanne loves Corey Henry.

02:34:14.000 She goes to the concert.

02:34:14.000 She's sitting next to Stevie Wonder.

02:34:16.000 And Stevie Wonder didn't stand.

02:34:18.000 The whole place was standing.

02:34:19.000 And Leanne was like, why isn't he standing?

02:34:21.000 I go, because you only stand to see.

02:34:23.000 If you're blind, you're going to sit through the whole show.

02:34:25.000 It's no different to you.

02:34:26.000 So I was like, and then I have video of Stevie Wonder sitting.

02:34:26.000 Right.

02:34:30.000 But it's also convenient because who the fuck wants to stand for a show?

02:34:34.000 I don't.

02:34:35.000 Helen Keller?

02:34:36.000 The Helen Keller one's different.

02:34:37.000 The Helen Keller one's because there's doctors that have said, like, there's, it was medical records at the time where people said she was responding to light.

02:34:45.000 This says that there's, uh, that's not true.

02:34:48.000 The Helen Keller thing?

02:34:51.000 Medical board archives from 1902 to 1924 do not contain examination reports showing Helen Keller had functional vision and hearing throughout a disabled life.

02:35:00.000 And the conspiracy that Keller was a cash cow for Sullivan is debunked by the fact that Keller's full life continued with another companion, Polly Thompson, who also interpreted for her.

02:35:11.000 That doesn't mean anything.

02:35:12.000 That means that other person could be in on it as well.

02:35:14.000 Yeah.

02:35:15.000 That doesn't mean anything.

02:35:16.000 Also, this is a time in 1919.

02:35:18.000 I mean, come on.

02:35:19.000 Howard D. Easy was a lion.

02:35:21.000 1902 to 1924.

02:35:23.000 I mean, you could get away with so much.

02:35:25.000 So she supposedly flew a fucking plane. 1.00

02:35:29.000 I told you she shoo off. 1.00

02:35:30.000 Hold on.

02:35:30.000 Yeah, this says it was from like a movie and there's no movie.

02:35:34.000 She flew a plane in a movie.

02:35:35.000 A silent film.

02:35:36.000 She played herself.

02:35:37.000 She played herself flying a plane.

02:35:39.000 They just thought people were retarded back then.

02:35:41.000 They're like, show her flying a plane.

02:35:42.000 She's the best.

02:35:43.000 She started the university.

02:35:44.000 Nothing can hold her back.

02:35:46.000 Why is it holding you back?

02:35:47.000 She can't hear.

02:35:48.000 And she could talk and write books.

02:35:48.000 She can't see.

02:35:50.000 Like, wait, what?

02:35:52.000 Okay, that is this one article.

02:35:55.000 But I've read things that said that the people that were examining her said that she responded to sound and that she responded to light.

02:36:05.000 Just because this one thing says it's not true doesn't mean that it's not true.

02:36:09.000 Well, then here's the question.

02:36:10.000 Because it's also, we don't know.

02:36:12.000 This is 100 years ago.

02:36:14.000 We really don't know.

02:36:16.000 How blind and deaf do you need to be before you say you're not blind and deaf?

02:36:20.000 Well, the thing is, like, can you not hear anything?

02:36:20.000 Right.

02:36:23.000 Can you not see anything?

02:36:24.000 That's blind and that's deaf. 1.00

02:36:26.000 Anything else is like, I have poor hearing and poor sight.

02:36:28.000 Yeah, but that doesn't sell a fucking book.

02:36:31.000 Right, but that's the problem.

02:36:32.000 Like, maybe she could see a little.

02:36:34.000 Maybe she just had bad vision and maybe she could talk a little.

02:36:38.000 Because otherwise, how explain to me how you're going to write books.

02:36:42.000 Explain to me how you're going to grasp concepts and language and communication and interaction.

02:36:47.000 Explain to me.

02:36:49.000 I've never met anybody since then that's been able to do it.

02:36:49.000 I don't get it.

02:36:52.000 Do you know blind, deaf people today write books and fly planes? 1.00

02:36:56.000 I don't know if she filled a plane. 0.90

02:36:58.000 She's just in the plane.

02:36:58.000 That's what it said.

02:36:59.000 Oh, yeah.

02:37:00.000 She's in the front of the plane than they usually fly for the first time.

02:37:02.000 I saw a blind guy on a plane once.

02:37:03.000 I didn't think anything of it.

02:37:04.000 I didn't think he flew.

02:37:06.000 I almost got in a fight with the blind guy at the Austin Airport. 1.00

02:37:08.000 For what?

02:37:08.000 Right after I did the show last time I was here.

02:37:10.000 I was a little high.

02:37:11.000 I went to the airport, a little drunk.

02:37:13.000 He was fighting with his wife, and he grabbed her by the back of the arm to leave, and I thought he was just grabbing her by the back of the arm like a dick.

02:37:20.000 And I was like, hey, and then he turned around and he had sunglasses on and a cane.

02:37:24.000 And I realized that's the only way he could get to the gate.

02:37:26.000 Look at Burt being a fucking white knight.

02:37:27.000 I know.

02:37:28.000 Stepping in, fighting blind guys. 0.98

02:37:30.000 Fuck that guy up.

02:37:31.000 It is so easiest fight I've ever been in.

02:37:34.000 The look on the black guy's face at TSA when I couldn't see that he was blind already and he grabbed his wife's arm and I went, hey, and the black guy went, oh shit. 0.99

02:37:43.000 Like not knowing you're talking shit to a blind guy. 0.97

02:37:46.000 You were drunk.

02:37:47.000 I was.

02:37:48.000 That was wasted.

02:37:49.000 So are there any people, are there any good articles that say Helen Keller could see?

02:37:54.000 I asked Perplexity.

02:37:55.000 It said she was blind and deaf caused by meningitis when she was 19 months old.

02:38:03.000 Again, I wonder.

02:38:04.000 I wonder if she could see a little.

02:38:06.000 See a little and hear a little.

02:38:07.000 Makes a lot more sense that you could write books.

02:38:10.000 I just stumbled across something that's I don't know how true it is.

02:38:12.000 It just says that somewhere along the way, Stevie Wonder got some sort of corrective something or other to help perception issues or what?

02:38:24.000 That means you could see.

02:38:25.000 Stop lying to me.

02:38:26.000 Damn it.

02:38:27.000 But he also, another thing says he's got detached retinas.

02:38:29.000 Wait, did you ever see that?

02:38:30.000 Oh, interesting.

02:38:32.000 So he has damaged vision then.

02:38:34.000 That sounds like damaged vision.

02:38:36.000 Yeah, shortly after birth due to retinopathy of prematurity from being born prematurely.

02:38:41.000 He's addressed his rumors persistently about being able to see.

02:38:46.000 He says it's a blessing allow him to see people's spirits, not their appearance.

02:38:50.000 So this is the Instagram thing that I saw initially on Helen Keller.

02:38:55.000 I'll send this to you.

02:38:59.000 Yeah, you don't believe that, but you believe that bullshit article that you just pulled up.

02:39:02.000 No, I'm saying starting with social media isn't the best place.

02:39:05.000 Listen, it's the best place for information.

02:39:07.000 It's where I get all my information.

02:39:08.000 Everything's accurate.

02:39:09.000 You could start there.

02:39:10.000 It's all real.

02:39:11.000 It's all real.

02:39:12.000 Have you ever told someone?

02:39:13.000 Yeah, I read a book about it.

02:39:14.000 It was just an Instagram post, and they're like, a book?

02:39:16.000 I think I saw the same post.

02:39:18.000 Helen Keller was a fraud. 0.98

02:39:20.000 Doctors proved she could see and hear.

02:39:21.000 That's her. 0.88

02:39:22.000 Her teacher made millions from the lie.

02:39:25.000 Said medical board archives from 1902 to 1924 allegedly contain examination reports suggesting Helen Keller retained partial vision and hearing throughout her life.

02:39:36.000 According to those claims, multiple physicians noted she reacted to sounds when Ann Sullivan was not present, tracked movement with her eyes, and physically flinched at loud noises.

02:39:45.000 One sealed report is said to conclude, I don't like that, is said to conclude that her responses pointed to coordinated deception rather than true disability.

02:39:57.000 Sullivan reportedly refused independent testing.

02:40:00.000 Aha.

02:40:01.000 The theory argues that the situation became highly profitable.

02:40:04.000 Sullivan allegedly discovered Keller at age seven, promoted a miraculous teaching breakthrough, and toured the country, charging the modern equivalent of thousands per appearance.

02:40:14.000 Supporters of the claim say Keller's autobiography noticeably changed tone when Sullivan became ill, suggesting Sullivan authored both voices.

02:40:22.000 Financial records are said to show Sullivan controlled all income, keeping Keller financially dependent for life.

02:40:29.000 Linguistic analytics cited by conspiracy supporters claim Keller's writings mirrored Sullivan's private letters exactly matching vocabulary, sentence structure, and even spelling mistakes.

02:40:41.000 They argue that Keller wrote without Sullivan present, that when Keller wrote Without Sullivan Present, the work appeared elementary, concluding that her eloquent public words came from Sullivan, not Keller.

02:40:53.000 According to the theory, disability organizations later built massive institutions around Keller's story.

02:40:58.000 When evidence questioning her condition surfaced, it was allegedly suppressed due to rather protect a lucrative charity, an inspiration-based industry that relied on a powerful symbolic figure.

02:41:10.000 Lance Armstrong.

02:41:12.000 This is like, this is the whole like, you build the whole thing and people start coming at you, right?

02:41:12.000 What do you mean?

02:41:21.000 It's like, this is the time when the elephant man was big.

02:41:23.000 But Lance Armstrong won those races.

02:41:25.000 And the thing about the Lance Armstrong thing is, you know, you could say Lance Armstrong cheated and he'll tell you he cheated, but the reality is everyone cheated.

02:41:34.000 If you wanted to go back into the archives when he won Tour de France and figure out like who didn't test positive, you had to go to 18th place.

02:41:43.000 Yeah.

02:41:44.000 So they took away all his jerseys.

02:41:46.000 By the way, fuck you, he says, because he still has all those jerseys in the wall.

02:41:51.000 Bitch, you can't take them from me. 1.00

02:41:52.000 You could say I didn't win, but everybody knows I won.

02:41:55.000 And everybody knows he won when all those other guys were doping too.

02:41:58.000 But I was saying they were trying to protect a lucrative profit.

02:42:02.000 And that's what didn't happen with Lance.

02:42:04.000 Like, they just threw him under the bus.

02:42:06.000 Well, he was also suing people who were saying that he took stuff because they were whistleblowers because they went after them first and said, listen, if you blow the whistle on Lance, we'll get you off the hook.

02:42:17.000 And so then he would sue them.

02:42:19.000 It'd be a better story if Helen was more like Lance.

02:42:21.000 And they're like, we got a tennis partner who says you play tennis with him, Helen.

02:42:25.000 She's like, I'm going to sue you.

02:42:26.000 And they're like, you're talking pretty good.

02:42:30.000 But this is around the time when the elephant man was big.

02:42:32.000 So you'd grab onto something, right?

02:42:34.000 You'd grab onto something like a sideshow.

02:42:36.000 Right.

02:42:36.000 And you'd parade it around the country.

02:42:38.000 Especially that woman who's her handler. 0.57

02:42:39.000 If that lady was responsible for all of her finances and had access to all that money. 1.00

02:42:43.000 Ann Sullivan.

02:42:44.000 That makes sense.

02:42:45.000 That's how I mixed up Anne Frank and Ann Sullivan. 1.00

02:42:47.000 That's how it came about.

02:42:49.000 There's no link here.

02:42:50.000 Shut up, Jamie.

02:42:51.000 I just want to say.

02:42:52.000 Stop ruining everything.

02:42:55.000 You're right.

02:42:56.000 There's no link there.

02:42:57.000 There's not a single link to say.

02:42:58.000 And people even ask, like, where are the links?

02:43:00.000 And when you do some of this stuff.

02:43:01.000 I like that one, though.

02:43:02.000 I knew it.

02:43:03.000 I'm with that guy.

02:43:04.000 Christian Harvey.

02:43:05.000 I'm with that guy.

02:43:06.000 I'm with that guy.

02:43:07.000 I've been saying this for years.

02:43:09.000 It just doesn't make sense that she'd be able to write so eloquently.

02:43:11.000 Did you ever see Kevin Hart and Dr. Dre talking about Stevie Wonder?

02:43:15.000 No.

02:43:16.000 Pull this up.

02:43:17.000 Kevin Hart, Dr. Dre.

02:43:19.000 Because Dr. Dre is not.

02:43:21.000 I mean, like, he's not, he never tries to be funny.

02:43:23.000 Right.

02:43:24.000 And he is so fucking funny on accident on this clip.

02:43:28.000 Talking about Stevie Wonder?

02:43:29.000 Just Stevie Wonder, Dr. Dre, Kevin Hart.

02:43:33.000 Album with Marsha Ambrosia, right?

02:43:35.000 And we did some music, a song using Stevie Wonder's music, and he had to clear it.

02:43:39.000 And he called me up, like, for some reason, Stevie Wonder called you, like, super early in the morning, like six, seven in the morning or some shit.

02:43:46.000 I'm like, just because you can't see the time.

02:43:51.000 What the fuck?

02:43:53.000 So, true story.

02:43:56.000 I don't like the lyrics.

02:43:57.000 I don't like the lyrics, guys.

02:43:58.000 Look at Kevin.

02:43:58.000 Okay, we went in and changed the lyrics.

02:44:00.000 It's like, what if we're like, just.

02:44:08.000 Stevie is crazy.

02:44:14.000 What the fuck is the difference?

02:44:15.000 Like 5 a.m. or 5 p.m. to Stevie.

02:44:21.000 That's true.

02:44:22.000 What's the difference?

02:44:23.000 That's true.

02:44:24.000 Blind people have a really hard time sleeping. 1.00

02:44:27.000 I imagine because it's dark all the time.

02:44:29.000 Yeah, their circadian rhythm's all fucked up, right?

02:44:32.000 They feel sunlight in their face, though, if they go outside.

02:44:34.000 They have to.

02:44:35.000 They have to.

02:44:35.000 I do.

02:44:36.000 Yeah, it probably feels really good.

02:44:37.000 Get that sun on your face.

02:44:39.000 You're blind.

02:44:41.000 You just don't feel the light.

02:44:43.000 Just feel the warmth.

02:44:44.000 I bet you see it when you open your eyes a little bit.

02:44:46.000 But you see something.

02:44:47.000 It depends on your level of blindness, right?

02:44:49.000 Some people could just see light, like a little bit of light.

02:44:52.000 I would love that they made like blind glasses.

02:44:54.000 Like, this is how blind you have to be to be considered blind.

02:44:57.000 And you could just put them on and be like, okay, that's blind.

02:44:59.000 Oh, like legally blind.

02:45:00.000 Yeah, yeah, like legally blind glasses that we could all put on.

02:45:03.000 And then they're like, that'd be cool if they made like versions.

02:45:06.000 Like, this is how blind Helen Keller was. 0.97

02:45:08.000 And you put them on, you're like, oh, I can fucking see.

02:45:10.000 Yeah, we don't know.

02:45:11.000 I guess there's no way to find out.

02:45:12.000 I like to believe that it was a fraud.

02:45:13.000 I think that's fun.

02:45:15.000 I like to believe that people pull.

02:45:16.000 Well, it's like Watergate.

02:45:18.000 I like finding out.

02:45:19.000 I got to get rid of that book now.

02:45:20.000 Yeah.

02:45:21.000 That fucking bums me out.

02:45:22.000 It's wired.

02:45:23.000 Listen, you watched the episode that I did with Bill Murray.

02:45:25.000 He fucking hated that book.

02:45:27.000 He said, yeah, after five pages, he was like, I knew it was bullshit.

02:45:31.000 Yeah.

02:45:31.000 God.

02:45:32.000 Bert, I love you to death.

02:45:33.000 Joe, I love you.

02:45:34.000 Tell everybody about your show.

02:45:35.000 It's on Netflix right now.

02:45:36.000 Free Bert, streaming on Netflix right now.

02:45:38.000 Check it out.

02:45:39.000 If you like it, just enjoy it.

02:45:41.000 Tell a friend.

02:45:42.000 Boom, boom.

02:45:43.000 275 pounds in this.

02:45:45.000 Damn.

02:45:46.000 You look like you lost a lot of weight.

02:45:47.000 How much are you down to now?

02:45:48.000 40 pounds.

02:45:49.000 35 pounds or 45 pounds.

02:45:51.000 I'm sorry.

02:45:51.000 And you haven't drank in how long?

02:45:52.000 Just 17 days.

02:45:54.000 That's good.

02:45:55.000 Yeah, I got another, I have a timer set, five months and 18 days.

02:45:59.000 So at six months, you're going to have a drink?

02:46:02.000 Yeah, well, I got a second opinion.

02:46:03.000 You know that, Joe.

02:46:04.000 Okay.

02:46:04.000 I'll see you in six months.

02:46:05.000 I'll see you in my past.

02:46:06.000 I'll see you before.

02:46:07.000 Are you coming tonight?

02:46:08.000 You're going to be around the night?

02:46:09.000 I'm trying to go to spend time with Tom's kids.

02:46:11.000 I was going to take him to dinner.

02:46:12.000 Beautiful.

02:46:12.000 Okay.

02:46:13.000 Good luck getting Tommy on the phone these days.

02:46:13.000 Well, it's good.

02:46:15.000 He's a busy boy.

02:46:16.000 Yeah.

02:46:17.000 Busy boy.

02:46:17.000 Yeah, real busy Tom.

02:46:19.000 That dude's busy, though.

02:46:20.000 He's kind of crazy busy.

02:46:20.000 No.

02:46:21.000 Yeah, I own a vodka company with him.

02:46:23.000 Yeah, he opened up a restaurant.

02:46:24.000 We have a 5K.

02:46:25.000 You could have come run our 5K, Joe?

02:46:26.000 No.

02:46:28.000 No.

02:46:28.000 L.A.?

02:46:29.000 I don't go to L.A. When was the last time you were there?

02:46:34.000 I guess it was like, I went there for the UFC seven months ago or something like that.

02:46:40.000 Yeah.

02:46:41.000 I don't go there anymore.

02:46:42.000 L.A. to me is like just a bad relationship.

02:46:45.000 Like that you like, you run into a girl that used to be cool and now she's just a mess. 0.98

02:46:49.000 And you're like, oh.

02:46:50.000 You don't miss anything about it?

02:46:52.000 Nope.

02:46:54.000 I'm good at moving on.

02:46:57.000 Thanks for having me on, Joe.

02:46:59.000 I love you to death.

02:46:59.000 My pleasure, brother.

02:47:00.000 All right.

The Joe Rogan Experience - January 29, 2026

Joe Rogan Experience #2445 - Bert Kreischer

Episode Stats

Summary

Transcript