This week on the Joe Rogan Experience Podcast, we talk about Alpha-braining, smoking, and why politicians are selling you stuff you should probably shouldn t be selling. Also, we have a special guest on the pod this week, a guy named Brian, who is a comedian, writer, and all-around funny guy. He's a friend of mine and I really enjoyed having him on the show, so I hope you guys do too. Also, if you don't know who Brian is, then you're in for a treat, because he's one of the funniest people I've ever met, and I think you'll agree that he's a great dude, so why not give him a try? If you're not already addicted to Alpha-Braining, you should definitely give it a try, because it's amazing and it's a lot cheaper than most of the other stuff you can get from other sources like coffee, asparagus, and other stuff like that. We also talk about how smoking is bad, and how to quit smoking and how it's actually not as bad as you think it is, and that it's not that bad at all. Joe also talks about how he thinks cigarettes are actually pretty good for you and how they should be better than other things, like aloe and aloe, so you can quit smoking. . Joe's a little bit more than you think they are, so if you want to give up smoking, you can do it. Enjoy the episode, and don't forget to leave us a review and tell us what you think about it on Apple Podcasts, and we'll be listening to it in a future episode of the show! and the rest of your thoughts on this podcast! Enjoy! XOXO! xoxo, Brian and Joe ( ) Thank you so much for your support, Brian and I appreciate it so much. XO, Brian, Brian - The Joe Rogans Experience Podcast. - xo, Jake, & , Jake, Joe, , and the Podcast . . - Joe, and is a podcast, and much more! - Brian, :) Thanks to: Brian, and Joe, Ben, and Ryan, and Brian, for being a great guy, and thanks for listening to this episode.
00:03:48.000But, what if your company was like Philip Morris Tobacco, and then you're driving a fucking Ferrari and flying around in a private jet, because you're poisoning all these fucks, so you have to keep, like, greasing politicians, and that's why you never hear any of these guys.
00:04:02.000You never hear Obama, you never hear Bush, you never hear anybody talk about getting rid of cigarettes.
00:10:26.000If I get a little bit of sleep the night before, I feel like if I stop drinking and then do some shit and then go to bed, I feel fucking so much better.
00:10:34.000But when I wake up and I have that beer on the bed stand next to me, just staring at me like a gay lover, like we had a weird fucking night last night.
00:10:46.000O-N-N-I-T. If you order the first 30 pills and you have an opportunity to try it out, and if you don't like it, you get a 100% money back guarantee.
00:10:58.000The idea is that what we're selling you is really good.
00:11:32.000But if you're interested in any of the nootropics that are available on AlphaBrain, use the code name ROGAN, and you'll save yourself 10% off.
00:11:38.000And as I said, 100% money-back guarantee on the first 30 pills.
00:11:41.000We also have, just in, kettlebells and battle ropes.
00:11:45.000And these are the newest addition to the Onnit store.
00:11:47.000And if you've never done kettlebell workouts before...
00:13:00.000Anyway, if you're interested in kettlebells, in my opinion, if I had to choose one method of strength and conditioning, I would choose bodyweight exercises and kettlebells.
00:13:11.000Things like bodyweight squats, Bodyweight squats are a beast.
00:13:25.000When you get towards the end, when you get close to 200, there's a guy named Carl Gotch who's this fucking crazy wrestler dude who's an awesome old catch wrestler.
00:13:33.000He used to make his students do 500 of them before practice.
00:26:01.000I had a Whopper, fries, and their smoothie.
00:26:05.000The smoothie was okay, but the Whopper, it tasted like it was grilled and thrown in a bucket and then thrown in the microwave and then slapped on mayonnaise.
00:26:14.000It was just the most disgusting tasting hamburger ever.
00:26:17.000Their fries, they changed their fries or something.
00:26:37.000Those things take time the reason why Burger King and McDonald's works is familiarity people been going there forever and There's you know, you use a guarantee you go in there you get it you go But something happened to Burger King cuz it didn't used to always be like they can't fuck with Wendy's If you got if you want to go for like the best like chain in my opinion.
00:26:56.000Yeah Wendy's like nationwide nationwide I agree, but Wendy's can't fuck with in and out when Oh, no one fucks.
00:28:54.000No, you think with today's people that are on all these diets and stuff and that they're so concerned about it, that there'll be one person to step up and be like, look, we're going to make quinoa 24 hours a day fast food, you know, quinoa sides.
00:29:08.000Like, we're going to have a healthy, all 100% natural, vegan, crap, you know, everything, but it's 24 hours a day and it's, you know, like Starbucks.
00:29:17.000So you need something that's an alternative to Jack in the Box.
00:29:55.000But it's definitely coming out in Florida.
00:29:57.000And they only talked about it because when Chick-fil-A got on all that heat for sending anyone gays to marry.
00:30:02.000I heard all these other places talking about, you know, Chick-fil-A is one of the healthier places to eat, and this new place is going to be the same type of thing.
00:31:52.000I don't know, but I'm But I only know that because I did a channel, a show for Animal Planet, and this woman was raised premium stallions, and she told me she was like, she was maybe one of the greatest days of my life, but she told me, she goes premium stallions are stallions that keep pregnant because they do this, they produce this hormone that goes into hair shampoo.
00:32:11.000And then she said, oh yeah, and it's the Canadians.
00:37:03.000So it's like, give me one cotton pick a minute.
00:37:05.000It actually means give me the longest fucking minute you could ever give me because cotton picking was exhausting.
00:37:10.000Cotton apparently was way easier to process.
00:37:14.000So that's why it took over from hemp until the 1930s.
00:37:20.000They came out with a machine called a decorticator and they were going to have everything convert back to hemp.
00:37:24.000We use cotton, but cotton is like, it sucks ass compared to hemp.
00:37:29.000In comparison to hemp, it's not nearly as strong.
00:37:31.000The tensile strength, the durability, it's an amazing plant.
00:37:37.000But the people that were in the cotton industry got together with DuPont, who were the people that made nylon, and William Randolph Hearst, who was the guy who ran Hearst Publications, who also had these paper mills that were all based on wood.
00:37:51.000And he would have had to convert them to use hemp.
00:38:41.000So we have limited quantities to sell this hemp protein powder because it's the best hemp protein powder that you can get is made in Canada.
00:40:08.000We're both car enthusiasts and we're talking about looking at the cars from the 70s.
00:40:14.000From the early 70s to the late 70s to the early 80s to the 90s.
00:40:19.000It's like, what the fuck happened to us?
00:40:21.000We completely lost the ability to make cool cars.
00:40:26.000Like, somehow or another, if you go back to the 50s and the 60s, and you look at what America had, like Corvettes and fucking Mustangs, and those are dope cars.
00:40:36.000They're so dope that people still want them today, even with their shitty-ass technology of the 1960s.
00:40:42.000People still drive Mustangs around, because they're so fucking cool-looking.
00:41:30.000Is the auto world, like, the auto community in this country, what the fuck happened to them in the 80s and the 90s that they were so uncreative?
00:41:39.000I bet it was the same thing we were talking about, is they just got, is the tobacco industry, they just got, they just stopped fucking caring, and they were making money hand over fist, and then all of a sudden the Japanese just took it over.
00:41:48.000I would love to hear a story about it.
00:41:55.000Maybe it's like people gave up taking psychedelics, and all the designers weren't taking psychedelics anymore, and they weren't drawing stingrays.
00:42:03.000Instead, they were drawing these fucking shitty Corvettes of the 80s.
00:42:07.000Did you ever see the Corvettes of the 80s?
00:42:10.000If you're driving around in a 1980-something Corvette, most, I mean, you might be a cool guy, you might be an enthusiast, but chances are you're a fucking loser, right?
00:46:10.000I don't know why, but it's a fun, little, sporty car.
00:46:13.000It's like, it's a weird thing with car culture, is that, like, there's a lot of folks that will drive, like, older cars from, like, you know, driving a 1960 MG, one of those little things.
00:46:54.000Porsche's design teams, they just make things that you lust for.
00:46:58.000You look at them, you just go, oh, shit.
00:47:01.000I would rather, I think I would rather if I had to get like a sports car, I got given the Corvette, fucking turbo, whatever the beast Corvette.
00:47:11.000The ZR1. For like a week, they gave it to me.
00:47:14.000And I drove that thing around and I fucking loved it.
00:47:18.000I loved it because everyone looks at you.
00:47:20.000It's like having a big dick in a locker room.
00:50:07.000It's the ability to do it where they're so composed.
00:50:10.000That Volkswagen that he has, okay, you compare that.
00:50:14.000That car would beat around a track any power muscle car from the 60s.
00:50:19.000If you took some regular 1969 Camaro with stock equipment, one of those badass Camaros, and raced it around the Nurburgring, you would dust that thing.
00:55:02.000I dressed up in my mom's leotard, her gayest belt possible, two bike chains and a Kiss thing, and just jammed out to a party all night long.
00:55:10.000For fucking three minutes, just jammed out.
00:55:39.000So, fucking Gene Simmons shows up, and I go up to, he's in the room, I go to the pre-interview, so I go to his dressing room, and I knock on the door, and they open it, and I said, Miss Simmons, my name's Bert, I'm the host of the show, I'll be doing the interview, and he just puts his finger in front of my face, and he goes, no.
00:56:27.000So then I leave and then Mark Cronin comes in and he goes, listen, Gene doesn't want a guy to interview him.
00:56:32.000He wants Daphne, the girl, he wants Daphne to interview him.
00:56:36.000I go, Daphne doesn't know shit about KISS. I go, this is my hero, I can't be on it.
00:56:40.000He goes, I'll tell you what, I will let you, you can be on the couch and you can just kinda hang out in the interview and you can jump in as much as possible, but Daphne's gonna run the interview.
00:58:26.000And then, if you can help him, like, obviously, Opie and Anthony does a huge show, and Gene realized that he needed to have little Jimmy on his side.
00:58:33.000I don't know what it is, but Jimmy now had a good experience with him, and they're friends.
01:00:12.000So we do the interview, and everyone wants to take pictures, and I go, oh, I want one too, but I want one with just me and you shirtless in my green room.
01:00:19.000And so everyone laughs, and he doesn't laugh.
01:01:00.000Like the whole time up until climax and then you get to pass it off or be the dude that sucks it for that 15 seconds and just take a load in the mouth.
01:03:30.000And then you're like, where the fuck is this going to go from here?
01:03:33.000Like, and then it's him coming out of the, whatchamacallit, and then it's him going through therapy and like, like really kind of get, trying to get out and get, get some success and, and get out and like, and deal with whatever issues he had in the past.
01:04:31.000It was him and Larry David, and it was fun seeing these two brilliant guys that have accomplished this incredible task, creating Seinfeld, that sitcom, palling around together in this old Volkswagen many, many years later.
01:05:17.000I did the Laugh Factory podcast yesterday with Dom Herrera and Jamie Masada, the owner of the Laugh Factory.
01:05:25.000And I said that that's when I didn't like Jerry Seinfeld, which is really, there was a moment in time where I was slightly upset at him just for a half a second.
01:05:34.000But when I say something like that on the podcast, it's really ridiculous.
01:05:37.000Because the only reason why I was upset was when Kramer got busted and then they were on Letterman and Kramer called in via satellite and was sitting there.
01:05:45.000And people were laughing at some of the things he said.
01:06:23.000It doesn't appreciate, like, if Stanhope was there, and if it was Stanhope's friend that had done that on television, he would be laughing with the crowd.
01:06:44.000There's more humor and chaos in this country than there is in anything else.
01:06:48.000I've gotten nervous on stage as of late because of the onsite of technology and people recording and people just posting and recording and recording and posting.
01:07:27.000But he was saying, he was like, you know, it really sucks because when people tape it and put it up, then that's the representation that the world gets to see.
01:07:34.000And he goes, the evolution of the joke, you know, black people versus n-words.
01:07:38.000He goes, the evolution of that joke was horrible.
01:07:40.000And there's a lot of times where it just didn't look right.
01:07:43.000And he goes, and then I got it to the place where it worked, and even still, it's like, you know, once you even get it to where it works, it's not until another six months later that you figure out the right tag, you know?
01:07:54.000And it's like, that's the thing that sucks, is like, fucking, you know, you're trying to write a joke, and then people videotape and put it up, and you're like, I wasn't fucking done.
01:08:02.000Yeah, and it's also that people can know what your material is before they come to your shows.
01:08:06.000They'll know, like, all the stuff that you're going to do.
01:08:32.000When it comes to technology and things like, when it comes to people...
01:08:37.000Filming your art, you know, that you're doing in front of a large group of people and in front of an audience is people that are gonna want to film it.
01:08:44.000It's just that's what they want to do.
01:08:52.000You know, if I go to see somebody, man, I'll fucking think about filming it.
01:08:56.000If I went to see like a really good comic, if Dave Chappelle was doing a set and Brian was there and they let Brian put up his camera, I'm like, yeah, I get a copy of that.
01:13:18.000Brian goes up and down, because I swear, when Brian didn't smoke cigarettes, he had a completely different tune.
01:13:24.000He would tell you how horrible they were, and how the smell of it makes him sick now, and he can't believe he was ever so stupid that he smoked, and he feels so much better, and he can think better.
01:17:17.000You know, if you, a certain amount of any story you hear from people, any fantastical story that just gets distributed through the Internet or the news or whatever, a huge percentage of that has got to be crazy people that want attention because it's so easy to get attention.
01:17:32.000And if you're the type of person that wants to fake something, what are you going to do?
01:17:39.000Well, they believed for a long time that crop circles were real.
01:17:41.000And then they did that video where the guy proved he could do it in the night.
01:17:45.000The only problem with that, the only problem with those crop circles is the ones that they can do, they pale in comparison to some of the ones that are unexplained.
01:17:52.000Yeah, because the kick-ass people don't want to talk about it.
01:18:03.000What I was going to say is there was a show where some kids from MIT or Harvard recreated all of the situations that happened inside of a crop circle.
01:18:20.000It wasn't the most complex, but it was a pretty cool one.
01:18:23.000It was a cool crop circle that mimicked one of their science buildings on their campus.
01:18:29.000And they actually figured out a way to, there's little iron fragments, like almost microscopic, like balls of iron, melted iron, that people found inside the crop circles.
01:20:38.000Is that this is just some technology that is not public.
01:20:43.000That there's a way to make a geometric pattern in a field of wheat with some sort of a laser that's attached to a satellite that's in the sky.
01:20:50.000And then it can shoot down and cut into the ground like this thing.
01:20:55.000That it can microwave these plants and flatten them out.
01:21:50.000We're trying to kill off the poor people.
01:21:52.000No, poor people are dying because they're sick, you crazy fuck.
01:21:54.000And when, you know, the standard for calling someone, like, the real problem with AIDS in Africa, everyone's like, AIDS, Africa, everyone has AIDS in Africa.
01:22:05.000AIDS means your fucking immune system has crashed.
01:22:07.000And there's a bunch of reasons for that.
01:22:09.000And one of them is the lack of nutrition those people have.
01:22:12.000So it's not HIV? No, a lot of it isn't, man.
01:22:14.000When you call it all the same thing, it's not all the same thing, man.
01:22:20.000The crushing of the immune system that these Africans are experiencing may or may not be HIV-related, but they're not testing them all for HIV when they come up with these statistics.
01:22:31.000They're seeing people with AIDS. They're seeing people who are wasting away, and they know what the fuck is going on.
01:22:35.000But I guarantee you that a percentage of that has got to be nutrition.
01:23:09.000You know, and these poor people in Africa, what you're dealing with is a bunch of different factors.
01:23:14.000I'm sure some of them are getting HIV, too.
01:23:17.000even causes AIDS is that Peter Duisburg guys who scares the fucking shit out of you because he's a biologist at the University of California Berkeley and look I'm a I have no understanding of biology diseases how they work how they you know retroviruses I don't understand any of that stuff right so when I listen to a guy like that talk and say that he doesn't believe that HIV even causes AIDS and he thinks that AIDS is a bunch of ridiculous shit Sounds like it is, right?
01:24:28.000I was like four or five but it was one of those staining memories like where he's chasing her around like a counter or something like that and it just creeped me the fuck out man.
01:25:00.000When I had my AIDS outbreak this weekend, when I was at the doctor, and they put that thing in your ear to make your ears, I don't know why they didn't see your ears, but they were like, dude, your earwax is really bad.
01:26:28.000And what happens is she's like, there's two different kinds of earwax.
01:26:32.000There's one that's kind of like honey, and there's one that's kind of like a prune.
01:26:36.000And she's like, you have the prune kind, which like builds and builds, and it stays kind of like a hard thing, so you never even know it's there.
01:27:15.000You know, that's why they have certain sounds that they put around certain buildings that only kids can hear, and it's like annoying to keep kids away.
01:27:24.000Yeah, there's a frequency that young kids can hear that we can't hear anymore.
01:28:59.000A lot of fucking money in pain management.
01:29:01.000Well, there's a lot of money in prescribing all kinds of different...
01:29:04.000Any time you can get a line of people that need some pills and you can sell them some pills, you just have to have a doctor there who's willing to scribble some shit on some paper and you're golden.
01:31:14.000Unfortunately, the reality is that bacon and eggs, when you have the bacon and eggs and coffee breakfast that Rob Wolf, the guy who wrote the Paleo Solution.
01:31:23.000Weren't you supposed to try it for a month, though?
01:32:52.000I would rather eat wild things that were running around their whole life and then got blasted out of nowhere.
01:32:56.000I think that's like the most humane and the smartest way for us to approach it.
01:33:01.000Like, I really think Ted Nugent's got it nailed.
01:33:03.000That guy lives on a fucking giant ranch, and he kills animals every day.
01:33:06.000He goes, and he sits up in a tree stand, and he waits, and he shoots a fucking deer with a bow and arrow, and that's what they eat for dinner.
01:33:21.000But when I look at what makes me feel the healthiest, I've tried the bacon and eggs in the morning, and although it's fucking fantastic and delicious as shit, I don't feel as good as when I have the kale shakes.
01:34:57.000And even though it's fruit sugar, it's sugar, natural sugars from fruit, it's better for you than standard sugar, you know, like, you know, processed sugar.
01:35:04.000You still really shouldn't have that much, probably, all the time.
01:35:06.000You know, I think your body aches for greens.
01:35:10.000Fruits are very good, very important, especially after training.
01:35:23.000Donnell Rollins, we were doing this show, this TV show for, whatchamacallit, for Comedy Central, and Donnell is like, Donnell grew up in the hood.
01:38:52.000Say if you were trapped somewhere and all you had to eat was rabbits for like a month, you might starve to death just eating just those rabbits.
01:42:41.000Have you seen the videos of all the...
01:42:43.000By the way, in no way do we make light of any of the recent gun shooting tragedies that have been going on.
01:42:50.000When you discuss guns, I think that's sort of the elephant in the room.
01:42:52.000You have to bring up all these different tragedies that are going on.
01:42:55.000This Sikh temple thing is so horrific, man.
01:42:58.000If you've never met Sikhs before, they are some of the nicest, most peaceful people...
01:43:03.000And they're saying that someone confused them, some white supremacist dude confused them with Muslims and he was an idiot and some 9-11 guy.
01:43:13.000He probably had PTSD. So anyway, he goes in and shoots up this place.
01:43:18.000But there's videos, and this is where it gets really crazy, of these people that are from the temple who were talking to reporters and they're talking about multiple gunmen.
01:43:29.000They said there were three other guys.
01:43:30.000They kept saying there's three other guys.
01:45:09.000These people are saying, and this is where it gets interesting, is because these people are saying that they were there and they saw more than one gunman.
01:45:15.000And it could mean they were in absolute, abject terror and they hallucinated.
01:45:21.000But the fact that so many of them hallucinated, you know, when you're in a period of an intense traumatic situation like that, it is possible that one person could say that.
01:45:30.000Yeah, but no one in the Colorado massacre said anything more than that.
01:46:11.000It wasn't haphazard and I think that's why police and everybody are taking the proper protocol to get the situation under control.
01:46:23.000I'm not trying to jeopardize anything and describe what's happening currently, but as far as your mother, she was at the time that we spoke at one point hiding.
01:46:31.000Did she give you any sense for how many people, at that time at least, were hiding?
01:46:37.000The sense over there was when she started hiding in the closet, she didn't know how many people were out there.
01:51:05.000I don't know if there was four people or just one person in there.
01:51:08.000I don't know if it was really just a...
01:51:11.000But the sad thing is that these people died and if it really was some sort of a white supremacist group, these people are the nicest people ever.
01:51:19.000Sikhs, first of all, they eat marijuana.
01:52:55.000It on tar, meaning one god, along with praxis, in which the Sikh is enjoined to engage in social reform through the pursuit of justice for all human beings.
01:53:09.000This sounds like the most beautiful religion ever.
01:53:11.000Yeah, Sikh advocates the pursuit of salvation in a social context through the congressional practice of meditation on the name and message of God.
01:53:21.000The followers of Sikh are ordained to follow the teachings of the ten Sikh gurus or enlightened leaders, as well as the holy scripture entitled the Guth Granth Sahib Ji, which along with the writings of the Sikh, this is getting a little wordy, I think we figured out the conspiracy, though.
01:53:39.000They're all fucking high on marijuana and they're seeing multiple people.
01:59:48.000If you're in San Jose and you don't go to that improv, you wouldn't even know as you drove by that unless you're a resident that knows the history of the building, but that's an old-time show building from silent movie days.
02:02:35.000What the Ice House Chronicles are, we've been doing podcasts for a while, but to do a podcast and a show at the same time really is one of the most perfect combinations because everybody gets loosened up before they go on stage in the podcast studio.
02:03:46.000I think the love that we've experienced from you guys is one of the coolest, most inspiring things that I've ever been a part of in my entire quote-unquote career in show business.
02:04:00.000I think we figured out how to cut out all the middlemen, all the bullshit, all the producers, and allow people to have real fucking conversations.
02:04:10.000Allow people who are listening to join in on a real conversation.
02:04:43.000That's sort of our ethic, all of us together.
02:04:45.000And it's an important way of looking at the world, man.
02:04:48.000The more truthful you are with your own thoughts, and the more truthful you can be about your own thoughts to other people, the more we can all learn from each other.
02:04:56.000Because if you're saying something like Bert Kreischer, you're an honest dude.
02:05:00.000When you tell me something, I know that that is coming right from you.
02:05:03.000I go, Bert Kreischer's an honest dude.
02:05:04.000I can totally trust what he's saying right now.
02:05:08.000As soon as you can't, you're in a bullshit conversation.
02:05:12.000As soon as you're talking, well, how's everything?
02:05:14.000Have you been out to the lake this year?
02:05:16.000As soon as you get into a bullshit conversation where you don't really care about what you're saying, you're just making noises with your mouth for social purposes.
02:05:24.000You're not growing from that shit that you have to do when you're in that fucking cubicle all day, talking on the phone, answering customer service calls.
02:05:30.000You're not growing from that, goddammit.
02:05:32.000You grow from either experiencing a real conversation through your headphones because you're tuning into this podcast, or you're having real conversations yourself.
02:05:42.000You're having real conversations with your friends.
02:05:44.000And don't keep anybody in your life where you can't have that.
02:05:48.000If you can't have a real conversation with them, they are just going to be a goddamn roadblock.
02:05:52.000Those people are walking landmines and you owe it to them to tell them the fucking truth.
02:05:56.000Don't be that person yourself and if you run into one of those people, the only way they're going to change is they're going to feel like shit because people call them out on it and they're going to have to reassess their own situation.
02:06:06.000That's the only way you improve people.
02:08:07.000I firmly believe in it enough to the point where the first 30 pills, if you buy them, if you don't feel that they're satisfactory, you get 100% money back guarantee.
02:08:22.000It was much more fun though, you're right, with the flashlight.
02:08:24.000Keeping them organic when you're talking about kettlebells and being fucking manly.
02:08:29.000You gotta get some cannonballs and you learn how to do some Turkish get-ups and you need to get off the bicep curls and tricep extensions, you fruity bitch, because you're imbalancing your body and you're gonna get dick pains.
02:09:16.000Because the scalpers, it's a weird thing when you go and you find your tickets for sale somewhere other than the official website, because it's sold out, and they're for sale for a fuckload of money.
02:09:25.000Louis's got the business paradigm down.
02:09:27.000I've got to copy him with everything he does except his hair.
02:09:29.000Alright, this fucking show is a beautiful show.