The Joe Rogan Experience - September 23, 2026


Joe Rogan Experience #2557 - Yakov Smirnoff

Hosted by
Guests
Mentioned
Joe Rogan Experience #2556 - Siddharth Kara

Episode Stats


Length

2 hours and 24 minutes

Words per minute

153.68

Word count

22,160

Sentence count

2,281

Harmful content

Toxicity

128

sentences flagged

Hate speech

49

sentences flagged


Transcript

Transcripts from "The Joe Rogan Experience" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:01.000 Joe Rogan Podcast, check it out.
00:00:04.000 The Joe Rogan Experience.
00:00:06.000 Train by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night, all day.
00:00:12.000 Let's go, Yakov.
00:00:13.000 What's happening, baby?
00:00:14.000 How are you?
00:00:15.000 I'm doing good.
00:00:16.000 Good to see you.
00:00:16.000 Nice to see you.
00:00:18.000 I know, Jamie's snucking up on us.
00:00:19.000 Bam!
00:00:20.000 Bam!
00:00:20.000 Just turn it on.
00:00:22.000 That way you don't have a chance to freak out.
00:00:24.000 Thank you.
00:00:25.000 What's in the bag?
00:00:26.000 What do you got there?
00:00:27.000 Okay, so there are a couple of things.
00:00:29.000 Oh, a couple of things.
00:00:30.000 One, yeah.
00:00:31.000 One is.
00:00:33.000 It's a mural, a piece of the mural that I painted at the Ground Zero, and I thought it would be interesting for you to have.
00:00:41.000 You painted a mural at Ground Zero?
00:00:43.000 Yeah.
00:00:44.000 Oh, wow.
00:00:45.000 Yeah, so that was something, and I actually sent them a poll.
00:00:49.000 Harvey did the rest of the story about that, and I sent them a video if they wanted to.
00:00:57.000 Yeah, I don't know if we could play that, unfortunately.
00:00:59.000 I think it's got like a copyright to it.
00:01:02.000 Actually, I was.
00:01:03.000 We were told.
00:01:04.000 Jamie, isn't that what they said?
00:01:06.000 It would be tough.
00:01:07.000 Yeah.
00:01:07.000 Right.
00:01:08.000 So there's the mural.
00:01:09.000 There's a photo of the mural.
00:01:11.000 Right, right.
00:01:12.000 And it was, I was in touch with Paul Harvey Jr. asking if that would be okay, and they said it's fine and they'll send it.
00:01:21.000 Yeah, but I don't think they own it, you know what I'm saying?
00:01:24.000 They own his voice, so.
00:01:27.000 Right, but it's probably, if it's on Paul Harvey's television show, right?
00:01:31.000 No, no, no.
00:01:32.000 If it was a radio, yeah.
00:01:33.000 Right, if it's on Paul Harvey's radio show, it's probably copywritten.
00:01:37.000 Did we have a problem when we played the Taylor Sheridan one?
00:01:40.000 Remember, we played that whole thing?
00:01:43.000 It's just an issue?
00:01:44.000 It's an issue.
00:01:45.000 It's an issue.
00:01:45.000 Don't sweat it.
00:01:46.000 We don't want it.
00:01:46.000 So, anyway, you had a mural.
00:01:48.000 Yeah.
00:01:49.000 That's, that's, and then there was a couple of other little burp and nails.
00:01:53.000 You got to talk into the microphone.
00:01:54.000 Sorry.
00:01:55.000 Yeah.
00:01:55.000 That's all right.
00:01:56.000 You wear headphones if you want.
00:01:57.000 That way you can hear yourself.
00:01:58.000 Yes.
00:01:59.000 We don't have to.
00:02:01.000 This is real.
00:02:02.000 What do you mean?
00:02:02.000 This is real.
00:02:03.000 No, like, I watch you and I'm in such an awe of what you were able to, your career, your trajectory.
00:02:13.000 How you were able to sustain that longevity and then transition to this amazing voice.
00:02:23.000 It's just, it's been an honor to know you and be here.
00:02:28.000 So I'm a little nervous.
00:02:30.000 Well, don't be nervous. 0.80
00:02:31.000 Because listen, it's all just dumb luck. 0.95
00:02:34.000 There's a giant percentage of it that's dumb luck. 0.87
00:02:37.000 That's a fact.
00:02:38.000 I mean, I'm very persistent, that helps.
00:02:40.000 But this thing, the podcast, is a lot of it is luck.
00:02:45.000 You know how people talk about having a vision board?
00:02:47.000 I had a vision board.
00:02:48.000 And people say that to me all the time.
00:02:48.000 I imagined.
00:02:50.000 I'm sure you did that with this show.
00:02:51.000 I'm like, I didn't do anything of the sort.
00:02:54.000 I just kept doing it and it got big.
00:02:57.000 But it's just people talking.
00:02:59.000 Just like you and I talk in the green room.
00:02:59.000 Simple.
00:03:01.000 We're talking here.
00:03:01.000 Yes.
00:03:02.000 It's no big deal.
00:03:03.000 It's just a bunch of people get to listen to it.
00:03:05.000 Yes, yes, yes.
00:03:06.000 It's nothing that spectacular.
00:03:09.000 The spectacular thing is my guests.
00:03:11.000 That's the fortunate thing.
00:03:12.000 I'm the fortunate one because I get to talk to so many cool people. 1.00
00:03:16.000 Look at you with your fucking American flag on your. 1.00
00:03:18.000 On your phone cover. 1.00
00:03:20.000 Look at that.
00:03:20.000 Yeah.
00:03:21.000 Don't get fooled by the accent, ladies and gentlemen.
00:03:26.000 You know, we were talking about your story in the green room, and I was like, we have to do a podcast because your story is so crazy how when the wall fell, so did your career.
00:03:36.000 Yes.
00:03:36.000 Like you had this massive career.
00:03:38.000 I remember you from The Tonight Show.
00:03:40.000 I remember you all the time, you know, in Russia.
00:03:40.000 Yes.
00:03:43.000 You always had these jokes about Russia.
00:03:44.000 Yes.
00:03:45.000 And it was great because, like, you were a Russian comedian doing stand up in the United States.
00:03:50.000 Yes.
00:03:51.000 And then.
00:03:53.000 Once the Soviet Union fell.
00:03:55.000 Yes.
00:03:58.000 David Letterman had a top 10 list of things that will now change, that the Soviet Union is no longer there. 0.80
00:04:05.000 And I made number one on the list.
00:04:07.000 Jakob Smirno will be out of work.
00:04:10.000 And I thought it was humorous because I was living in Pacific Palisades next to Tom Hanks and Arnold Schwarzenegger.
00:04:20.000 I mean, I thought the American dream will never end.
00:04:24.000 And all of a sudden, six months later, none of my contracts in Las Vegas.
00:04:29.000 Atlantic City, Reno, Tahoe, none of them were renewed.
00:04:34.000 And I could not find work, literally.
00:04:36.000 I mean, I tried back to clubs and they wouldn't have me either.
00:04:40.000 What?
00:04:41.000 Yeah.
00:04:42.000 It was the comparison there was Van Meter that was an impersonator of John F. Kennedy.
00:04:53.000 He was an impersonator.
00:04:57.000 It was very popular at that time.
00:05:00.000 And then after the assassination, His career went nowhere right away.
00:05:06.000 And so, somewhat in some ways, it was similar to that that I was associated with the Soviet Union and my humor was associated with that.
00:05:20.000 And it was helping, I was helping President Reagan write jokes for his speeches for when he would go to Moscow.
00:05:33.000 You have a picture somewhere, Jamie.
00:05:36.000 I mean, it was amazing.
00:05:37.000 All of a sudden, I was like a joke supplier for the White House.
00:05:42.000 And it was, my career was just growing higher and higher.
00:05:48.000 And all of a sudden, it was gone.
00:05:53.000 It doesn't make any sense.
00:05:54.000 I mean, you still had great jokes.
00:05:57.000 Yeah.
00:05:58.000 And I'm sure people still wanted to see you.
00:06:01.000 That's what didn't make any sense.
00:06:02.000 It wasn't, I guess I wasn't relevant because they associated me so much with that.
00:06:10.000 And so I started after not having work and not being able to pay a mortgage.
00:06:17.000 I started looking for a place where they did not know that the Soviet Union collapsed.
00:06:23.000 And I ended up in Branson, Missouri.
00:06:27.000 I joke about this in my show, but it was a blessing in disguise because I was all of a sudden, my humor was family friendly, and this town is very much like that.
00:06:43.000 And they embraced me, and I mean, it wasn't right away, but it grew and grew and grew.
00:06:50.000 Wow.
00:06:51.000 And what is Branson like?
00:06:53.000 Because I would always hear about it.
00:06:54.000 Like, it was always like we would hear about it in LA that it was this freaky Bible town, that it's like creationist museums and stuff like that.
00:07:04.000 Like, here's a reconstruction of the Ark.
00:07:06.000 Like, that's the kind of stuff that you would hear.
00:07:08.000 Obviously, I never went, so I don't know.
00:07:10.000 Yeah.
00:07:11.000 I didn't want to go to Branson.
00:07:13.000 Okay, I was living in LA.
00:07:15.000 I didn't.
00:07:16.000 I mean, I. Did you move to Missouri?
00:07:18.000 Eventually, I had to, yeah, because I had to sell my house.
00:07:22.000 I mean, the whole thing went, yeah.
00:07:24.000 So, what happened is I didn't have.
00:07:28.000 I didn't know where to go.
00:07:29.000 I mean, it literally was scary.
00:07:31.000 I have two little kids at that time, and I can't find work.
00:07:36.000 So, my agent calls me and he said, Willie Nelson is doing this Farm 8 concert.
00:07:43.000 And.
00:07:45.000 Would you like to co host with him?
00:07:48.000 And I didn't have it, you know.
00:07:50.000 I said, sure, but I don't think farmers would know who I am.
00:07:54.000 And I got there 50,000 people.
00:07:56.000 I did my set and they gave me a standing ovation.
00:08:00.000 And I went, Wow, this is, I didn't expect that.
00:08:04.000 So I go to say goodbye and say thank you to Willie.
00:08:08.000 And I open the door and the smoke comes out.
00:08:14.000 And I was proud to say that I, you know, I didn't do drugs.
00:08:19.000 But after I opened that door, I couldn't say that anymore.
00:08:23.000 So I threw the smoke, he goes, Yakov, you should go to Branson.
00:08:28.000 They'll love you there.
00:08:30.000 And I was like, okay, I heard about it, but I was not sure.
00:08:35.000 So I go to Branson just to check it out.
00:08:39.000 And it's March of 1993.
00:08:46.000 And I've been struggling now for two years after the Soviet Union collapsed.
00:08:51.000 And I go in and I walk into one of the shows.
00:08:55.000 And it was Soji Tabuchi's show, it was a Japanese fiddle player.
00:09:02.000 That was just playing country music.
00:09:07.000 I didn't know about him.
00:09:08.000 And I walk in, and it's a matinee, and there are 2,000 people in that room.
00:09:13.000 Whoa.
00:09:14.000 And I'm going, what is going on?
00:09:17.000 Right?
00:09:17.000 This is crazy.
00:09:18.000 I was in Vegas.
00:09:19.000 I didn't know about him.
00:09:20.000 So then I go to Andy Williams' show, and it's the same thing 2,000 people, full.
00:09:27.000 And I'm going, well, if they can do this, I can do it as well.
00:09:33.000 And so I, in May, I rented a small theater and I just set my shop there, put my name on the wall, and I got first show, 17 people came in.
00:09:48.000 And I'm going, oh boy, I don't have a place to go, but this is not going to work.
00:09:56.000 But then I started doing, I was pretty creative.
00:10:00.000 I started, I said, I'm going to serve breakfast.
00:10:04.000 In the showroom, I'll call it Yak in a Box.
00:10:09.000 And I'm just going to make my mother recipe of breakfast, and people will pass it, eat, and hopefully more people will come.
00:10:20.000 So I would do two shows a day in the morning and in the evening dinner and breakfast.
00:10:29.000 And little by little, it grew, it grew, it grew.
00:10:32.000 And then a year later, my average was like.
00:10:35.000 400 people a show, and then the buses that's the big business.
00:10:41.000 There is the people come by bus in those days, a lot of them, and they would just um discovered me, and I started to become more and more popular.
00:10:54.000 And then I bought 2000 seat theater, and now I entertain over six million people there.
00:11:02.000 And it became, yeah, this is uh, this is kind of.
00:11:09.000 That's your theater.
00:11:10.000 Look at you.
00:11:11.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:11:13.000 So it's been a very successful journey overall.
00:11:21.000 I'm kind of the only celebrity or national known person there now.
00:11:27.000 Wow.
00:11:28.000 And so how often do you do shows there?
00:11:31.000 Now I got down to like 30 shows a year towards the fall, but I used to do 400 a year.
00:11:40.000 Just to make more money, and people were coming, and it worked out for me.
00:11:48.000 Well, good for you for the acting.
00:11:50.000 I'm sure that must have been very nerve wracking, though.
00:11:53.000 It was.
00:11:54.000 Especially with young children. 0.98
00:11:56.000 And you're, you know, from another country, you come to America, you're killing it. 1.00
00:11:56.000 Big time. 1.00
00:12:01.000 You think, oh my God, I'm the American dream.
00:12:03.000 This is incredible.
00:12:04.000 And then it's a nightmare all of a sudden, and you don't know what to do.
00:12:08.000 That's the problem with the world before social media, right?
00:12:12.000 Because before social media, like, you couldn't just put some clips out there and show that you're still performing and still going places.
00:12:20.000 Yeah.
00:12:20.000 Yeah.
00:12:21.000 Because back then there was like a narrative, and if that narrative got out, you were done.
00:12:25.000 You know?
00:12:26.000 So the narrative was canceled.
00:12:27.000 Yeah, it was canceled.
00:12:29.000 And I didn't have anything to do with it.
00:12:31.000 It's not like I had a scandal or something.
00:12:34.000 It's just I was helping Reagan to chisel the wall down, but there was a writing on the wall that I didn't see.
00:12:42.000 It says get a day job, you know, and I didn't see it.
00:12:46.000 Right?
00:12:47.000 So that's how it happened.
00:12:48.000 It's amazing that you found Branson.
00:12:51.000 And what would happen if you didn't?
00:12:53.000 That's what's really crazy.
00:12:54.000 Like, what do you think you would have been able to figure out a way to tour again?
00:12:59.000 Was it that clubs wouldn't book you or people wouldn't come?
00:13:03.000 Both.
00:13:04.000 Because people were not buying tickets, the clubs didn't book me, and the whole effect is just, you know.
00:13:12.000 So it was just the fall of the Soviet Union that people got in their mind oh, Yakov is done.
00:13:18.000 Yeah.
00:13:19.000 It was that quick. 0.98
00:13:20.000 That's what's fucked up about it. 0.96
00:13:21.000 It's because, like, You have very funny jokes. 0.92
00:13:24.000 Like you're a good comic. 1.00
00:13:25.000 It's like the idea that you can't be a great comic and talk about other stuff is so stupid. 0.98
00:13:31.000 But what happened, it was an evolution for me. 0.91
00:13:35.000 I think that I look back and I'm going, thank you for this, because it was kind of a one note tune.
00:13:48.000 And then it made me, forced me to go, okay, that topic is not necessarily the right thing.
00:13:56.000 Uh, right now it's not nobody cares because the Soviet Union is not there and nobody's scared of it because I was kind of like a you know, it was a headache from the you know, or the pain in the butt, uh, Soviet Union, and I'm preparation H and I they used me and then after swelling and itching went away, you don't need it anymore, right? 0.56
00:14:23.000 So that's how it happened. 0.54
00:14:24.000 So, so I went into it, that also coincided with my divorce.
00:14:33.000 And I was struggling trying to figure out what direction I go to.
00:14:37.000 And I realized that I was helping the Cold War to end in some ways by being involved with Reagan and helping with that.
00:14:50.000 And when that happened, I figured, you know, my divorce is happening.
00:14:59.000 The world becomes a better place. 0.98
00:15:04.000 Why is there laughter in the beginning of the relationship with men and women?
00:15:09.000 And then when there's divorce, the only people laughing are attorneys.
00:15:15.000 And I put that question to my audience.
00:15:18.000 So it became kind of like my laboratory of laughter.
00:15:22.000 I just start asking people, I said, How many of you remember laughter being part of that honeymoon stage of your relationship?
00:15:30.000 And they all applaud.
00:15:32.000 And I go, How many would go on a second date if you didn't have laughter on the first date?
00:15:38.000 And no one applauded.
00:15:40.000 So I became like this is kind of a universal thing that I was.
00:15:46.000 My dad was an engineer and inventor.
00:15:48.000 So my brain is kind of constantly looking for reverse engineering.
00:15:54.000 Why is it that laughter goes away in a relationship?
00:15:58.000 So as comedians, we gauge our relationship with the audience with laughter every time.
00:16:05.000 Did the relationship fall apart because you had to move to Missouri?
00:16:09.000 Or was it just a little bit of a challenge?
00:16:11.000 Yeah, it added to this.
00:16:13.000 But I think.
00:16:14.000 I was looking for the root of this, more like what is that that I am missing that I didn't do because, you know, I was.
00:16:25.000 You had a gimmick.
00:16:27.000 I had a gimmick, yeah.
00:16:29.000 But that was with my audience.
00:16:32.000 What was happening with my wife?
00:16:34.000 Why was that falling apart?
00:16:36.000 So I start seeing the parallel, and the kids were little at that time, and I was trying to explain to them.
00:16:45.000 What was going on, and I can show you what I did.
00:16:49.000 I brought this with me.
00:16:53.000 I showed this to, I know, show and tell.
00:16:57.000 I brought it for my, I started, I took magnets and I was showing my kids.
00:17:04.000 I said, Look, mommy and daddy, and we attracted one another, and we had you, and we had love and laughter, and what was happening.
00:17:15.000 And then something happened.
00:17:18.000 And I don't know if you can show it, Jamie.
00:17:20.000 There's people listening as well.
00:17:22.000 Okay.
00:17:23.000 Oh, okay.
00:17:23.000 So the magnets attract, but then when things don't go well, they repel.
00:17:31.000 So I was going, what is it that's attracting us and what is it that's repelling us?
00:17:36.000 And then after doing this, and I went to the University of Pennsylvania, got my master's degree in psychology, got my doctorate degree at Pepperdine.
00:17:48.000 I mean, I was digging in.
00:17:50.000 You did all this while you were doing Branson?
00:17:52.000 While performing Branson, yeah.
00:17:54.000 How were you doing that?
00:17:55.000 I would travel.
00:17:56.000 I would just go do a weekend.
00:18:01.000 I would take my schedule, make it the way I want it, and whatever I had to do, I would just travel to Pennsylvania and do that.
00:18:13.000 And you were taking in person classes?
00:18:15.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:18:16.000 But how were you doing that in person?
00:18:18.000 On the weekends.
00:18:18.000 On the weekends.
00:18:19.000 On the weekends.
00:18:20.000 Classes, yes.
00:18:21.000 Wow.
00:18:22.000 So you would work all week and then fly on the weekends.
00:18:25.000 Why were you doing that?
00:18:27.000 Well, it sounds exhausting.
00:18:29.000 It's interesting.
00:18:31.000 I was searching for a purpose.
00:18:33.000 I think that was, I noticed something that was universal.
00:18:39.000 And I wanted to prove that scientifically to myself and to, and I did because it was important to me.
00:18:49.000 And what I figured out.
00:18:51.000 And as a comedian, you'll understand that every time we tell a joke, the setup is we're meeting their needs.
00:19:00.000 They're interested in that topic.
00:19:03.000 You and I talked in the green room, like you need more topics, for example, for your one hour more to add.
00:19:11.000 And so the topics that you're looking for are the, you're meeting the needs of people.
00:19:19.000 They want, they aren't curious.
00:19:21.000 And then your humor is.
00:19:22.000 Is the punchline and that creates laughter.
00:19:26.000 If you don't meet their needs, if they're not interested, then your humor doesn't matter much.
00:19:33.000 So, in the relationship, the same thing happens.
00:19:36.000 So, if I put this, and I know people are listening, but they can maybe picture that.
00:19:41.000 If you put needs in the middle, then you.
00:19:47.000 You're talking about magnets.
00:19:48.000 You've got to remember a lot of these people are not listening.
00:19:51.000 Okay, so I'm going to abandon that.
00:19:53.000 Yeah, it's bad.
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00:20:30.000 So I get what you're saying.
00:20:31.000 Yeah.
00:20:32.000 The needs is the.
00:20:34.000 Flexible thing in our humor stays the same, but the needs or the setup is different.
00:20:44.000 So, if every business is successful when they figure out what is the need of people, like Apple, for example, they say, We develop a product that you don't know you need, but then you can't live without it.
00:21:04.000 That's their model.
00:21:06.000 So, the same thing, a restaurant, if they figured out what the need is that the community has, they're successful.
00:21:13.000 You figured out what the need that people have is, and they're listening to you and they love it.
00:21:20.000 Is it a need?
00:21:22.000 The word need is a weird one because for me, need is like food and shelter and community.
00:21:27.000 That's the real needs.
00:21:28.000 Everything else is desires or interests.
00:21:32.000 In the hierarchy of needs with Maslow, they just go higher and higher.
00:21:37.000 I see what you're saying.
00:21:38.000 So when you find, he called them needs.
00:21:43.000 I couldn't find a better.
00:21:44.000 No, that makes more sense now.
00:21:46.000 Yeah, I get it.
00:21:47.000 Yeah.
00:21:50.000 I feel like the most important thing about comedy is you have to be actually, excuse me, you have to actually be interested in what you're talking about.
00:21:57.000 Obviously, it has to be funny.
00:21:58.000 That's the most important thing.
00:21:59.000 But other than that, the second most important thing or the thing that really resonates with people is when someone's on stage and they're talking about something that means something to them, I get invested.
00:22:09.000 Exactly.
00:22:10.000 I'm invested in people that are fascinated with stuff.
00:22:13.000 I'm invested with people that have hobbies that they love.
00:22:17.000 Even if I have no interest in it at all, I want to hear them talk about it.
00:22:21.000 Exactly.
00:22:22.000 Exactly.
00:22:22.000 And I totally, that's, you found that, whatever you want to call it, desire, need, whatever you want to call it.
00:22:29.000 But whoever zooms in on that and understands it, they're successful in what they do.
00:22:35.000 So in marriage, my focus switched from the Cold War between countries.
00:22:43.000 To the Cold War between couples and understanding that men and women are different is very important because they have different needs.
00:22:56.000 And so, part of my dissertation was to give that understanding so then the person is not like searching, it doesn't know what he's looking for.
00:23:08.000 There, I'm married and I'm happily married now, and my main goal is to figure out what this.
00:23:17.000 My wife needs.
00:23:19.000 And if I can anticipate it, then we have love and laughter, and it's living there.
00:23:24.000 But if I don't, or if she doesn't, then we start arguing, and that happens in every family.
00:23:33.000 So I'm easier.
00:23:35.000 So there's a book by Dr. Willard Harley called His Needs, Her Needs.
00:23:40.000 And what he did, he was dealing with a lot of couples that were getting a divorce, and he was trying to help them in marriage counseling.
00:23:51.000 And he asked, he identified like 10 emotional needs.
00:23:58.000 And he asked these people to prioritize men and women.
00:24:04.000 And it was interesting that he said, I was shocked that five top needs for men were totally different from five top needs for women.
00:24:16.000 So if we don't know that, so the needs for women were affection, conversation, openness and honesty, family commitment, and financial support.
00:24:27.000 Not for every woman, but that was.
00:24:29.000 Majority. 0.51
00:24:30.000 And then for men, it was sexual fulfillment.
00:24:33.000 It was admiration.
00:24:37.000 Sexual fulfillment again.
00:24:40.000 But it was admiration, attractive spouse, recreational companion, and domestic support.
00:24:48.000 Which makes men seem really base.
00:24:51.000 They are. 1.00
00:24:52.000 Base and stupid. 1.00
00:24:53.000 We are. 1.00
00:24:54.000 Sexual attraction is number uno.
00:24:56.000 Yeah.
00:24:57.000 And then it's in there.
00:24:57.000 How's it in there twice?
00:24:58.000 That doesn't make sense. 0.97
00:24:59.000 No, I just fucked it up. 0.74
00:25:01.000 No, I was joking around.
00:25:02.000 Yeah, I was joking around.
00:25:03.000 Yeah, that's funny.
00:25:04.000 Like, admiration is a funny one.
00:25:06.000 That's funny.
00:25:07.000 Admiration is huge.
00:25:08.000 That's hilarious.
00:25:09.000 You need admiration from your wife.
00:25:11.000 That's hilarious.
00:25:12.000 Well, but it's not because if you think that I ask the audience, so here's what I do in my show.
00:25:21.000 And they're laughing, but they're also learning something.
00:25:25.000 I say, how many of you gentlemen here, at least once in a while, would like to hear your wife say, You're such a good man.
00:25:33.000 Thanks for.
00:25:35.000 Doing things for us, applaud.
00:25:37.000 And few people applaud.
00:25:39.000 And I go, Well, not every man is applauding because they're scared and they laugh.
00:25:46.000 And then I go, So let me ask you the same question from an opposite point of view.
00:25:51.000 Any of you gentlemen disagree with that?
00:25:53.000 Silence.
00:25:54.000 Then I go, You see, ladies, you used to do it.
00:25:58.000 You don't do it now, but you used to do it in the beginning.
00:26:01.000 That's what that attraction was, is the man needed that. 1.00
00:26:06.000 And women don't. 1.00
00:26:08.000 They don't want to be acknowledged or admired for what they do.
00:26:13.000 They want to be loved for who they are kind, beautiful, smart, selfless.
00:26:19.000 And I ask women, is that true?
00:26:22.000 And they applaud.
00:26:23.000 So it's subconscious, but I know for me, that's a very important thing that if I'm doing something, all I need is like, thank you.
00:26:35.000 And sometimes it's overlooked.
00:26:37.000 And that Don't feel right.
00:26:39.000 That's interesting. 0.51
00:26:40.000 It definitely resonates that men don't necessarily care if a woman does a thing, like if she's really good at a thing.
00:26:47.000 Right.
00:26:48.000 Like men, I mean, this is obviously a great generalization because there are probably some men, of course, that one of the things they love is the talent that a woman possesses or the drive.
00:26:59.000 But for the most part, what men want is someone to be nice.
00:26:59.000 Absolutely.
00:27:05.000 Nice and be pretty. 0.97
00:27:06.000 Like my friends have joked around about this before, my single friends, about like, I don't give a Fuck, if a girl works at McDonald's, is she nice? 0.98
00:27:12.000 Is she pretty? 0.99
00:27:13.000 Is she nice?
00:27:14.000 You know, and is she not like completely annoying to talk to?
00:27:17.000 Is she fun to talk to?
00:27:18.000 You don't care what her job is. 1.00
00:27:20.000 If she's cool and she's fun, but a woman meeting a cool, good looking guy that's nice that works at McDonald's, like, you fucking loser. 1.00
00:27:31.000 No shame to the people who work at McDonald's. 0.99
00:27:33.000 I worked fast food when I was younger, too.
00:27:37.000 The first place I worked at was a burger place called Newport Creamery.
00:27:37.000 I worked at a couple.
00:27:40.000 I worked at a place called Papagino's, it was an Italian fast food place.
00:27:46.000 Nothing wrong with working at McDonald's. 1.00
00:27:48.000 Point is, women don't respect it. 1.00
00:27:50.000 For whatever reason. 1.00
00:27:51.000 Especially the women that want to have a family and settle down and all that jazz, they look at a guy working at McDonald's like, you don't have any ambition.
00:27:58.000 And that's the thing that women want from men that men don't seem to really care that much from women.
00:28:04.000 Women want a guy that has ambition and men do not care generally.
00:28:10.000 Although I got to say, Phil Hartman, when he obviously did not have a good marriage because his wife killed him and then killed herself, obviously didn't have a good marriage. 0.64
00:28:22.000 Right.
00:28:23.000 He had almost got divorced a few times.
00:28:26.000 And I remember one time he and I were having a conversation about it. 0.90
00:28:29.000 And he said, He goes, If I fucking get divorced, he goes, My next wife, she has to like something. 0.99
00:28:34.000 He goes, I don't give a fuck what it is. 0.99
00:28:36.000 It's a rock climb. 0.99
00:28:36.000 I don't care. 0.99
00:28:37.000 You have to be into something.
00:28:39.000 So that was his thing, was like that.
00:28:41.000 He was really into things.
00:28:43.000 Like he got his pilot's license.
00:28:46.000 Like the place that I actually bought in California, I found out about that part of California because of him, because he took me up on a plane.
00:28:54.000 And he was explaining to me, like, there's other counties that you could live in, and these counties, like, they have land.
00:29:00.000 It's like, yeah, it's a drive, but it's like more peaceful and relaxed.
00:29:04.000 You don't have to be like in the heart of everything.
00:29:07.000 So he was into being a pilot.
00:29:10.000 He played music.
00:29:12.000 He always had a bunch of different interests that he was pursuing on top of being an actor and being a comedic actor.
00:29:20.000 And so he was really frustrated.
00:29:22.000 One of the things he was frustrated with is that his wife didn't have any ambition, she didn't have any interests.
00:29:28.000 Well, but she also probably didn't admire him for what his accomplishments were.
00:29:34.000 I think she wanted to be famous as well.
00:29:36.000 I mean, we probably shouldn't talk about this too much, but, and I think there was probably some resentment in his success.
00:29:42.000 I think she was trying to be famous as well.
00:29:44.000 Well, that's like those magnets repel.
00:29:46.000 Yeah.
00:29:46.000 Well, it's like sometimes when a couple, I've seen it the opposite.
00:29:50.000 Like a friend of mine, she was dating this guy who was a comedian, and when she started doing well, he started getting really shitty with her.
00:29:56.000 He started getting very resentful, and he would be insulting, and she could tell that there was, she was, He was not happy that she was doing well.
00:30:03.000 Yeah.
00:30:04.000 Because she started to take off, he wasn't.
00:30:06.000 Yeah.
00:30:06.000 And it was like he was very frustrated and they broke up.
00:30:08.000 And she was like, that always really hurt because I really felt like if I was doing well, if he loved me, he was going to be happy too.
00:30:15.000 And he wasn't happy.
00:30:17.000 It's nice if this was discussed in the beginning of the relationship.
00:30:21.000 Well, sometimes a man doesn't know and the woman doesn't know how they're going to behave.
00:30:25.000 You don't know what your character flaws are until you're presented by something that tests you.
00:30:29.000 Absolutely.
00:30:30.000 So my.
00:30:30.000 Absolutely.
00:30:32.000 My goal was to understand it better.
00:30:35.000 And there's a painting I sent Jamie.
00:30:38.000 If you, I painted this painting that kind of helped me, if you can find it.
00:30:44.000 It's a tree of love.
00:30:46.000 And it helped me to understand better what my role is because my first marriage, I did not know what my role was.
00:30:57.000 I was, I met a woman, an American girl, beautiful.
00:31:03.000 Everything was great.
00:31:04.000 When I shook her hand or she shook my hand, she almost broke my hand.
00:31:09.000 And my subconscious was like my mother was very strong in my parents' relationship.
00:31:18.000 Mom was the leader, and dad was a creative, wonderful man, but he would follow her.
00:31:25.000 And I subconsciously went with that script, the manuscript of my life.
00:31:34.000 And so this helped me to see something that I wanted.
00:31:40.000 Who do I want to be?
00:31:42.000 I wanted to be that strong man who is able to give life.
00:31:48.000 To a woman that she can be free, creative, bring our fruit children so she doesn't have to worry about that.
00:32:01.000 In my previous marriage, I didn't understand that.
00:32:04.000 So on stage, I came across like I was this strong guy who was invited to the White House to perform.
00:32:17.000 I was commanding.
00:32:19.000 A big group of 2,000, 3,000 people, and she saw that.
00:32:23.000 And then in a relationship, I became like, now she knows what to do.
00:32:29.000 I don't have to do anything.
00:32:30.000 So I said, I do, and I didn't do it.
00:32:33.000 I didn't know what it was, what my role was.
00:32:37.000 So it took me 20 years and all of that education to get to that place who do I want to become to attract a woman that wants to be.
00:32:49.000 In that role. 1.00
00:32:50.000 Damn, dude, you thought about this shit deep. 1.00
00:32:52.000 I did. 1.00
00:32:52.000 You were going through it, man. 1.00
00:32:54.000 I got you.
00:32:54.000 You were going through it because you're going through that, which is always a bummer for people, especially with children when you're getting divorced.
00:33:00.000 But then on top of that, your career goes away because the Soviet Union collapsed.
00:33:04.000 Yes. 1.00
00:33:05.000 And then you said, fuck it. 1.00
00:33:07.000 That's very admirable. 1.00
00:33:08.000 You said, fuck it. 1.00
00:33:08.000 I'm going to get educated and figure out what's wrong with me. 1.00
00:33:11.000 Exactly.
00:33:12.000 Yes.
00:33:13.000 And I don't know if you have a picture of my wife and the kids.
00:33:13.000 Yeah.
00:33:17.000 And the kid, now I'm 75 and I have a one year old.
00:33:21.000 Yes.
00:33:21.000 What?
00:33:23.000 When did you get married?
00:33:23.000 I know.
00:33:24.000 How long did you?
00:33:25.000 Seven years ago.
00:33:26.000 So, this is.
00:33:27.000 So, you spent like 20 years single.
00:33:29.000 Yeah.
00:33:29.000 Just trying to figure yourself out.
00:33:31.000 Damn. 1.00
00:33:31.000 Yes. 1.00
00:33:31.000 Yes. 1.00
00:33:32.000 I went to all Tony Robbins.
00:33:32.000 You went on a walk.
00:33:35.000 Yeah.
00:33:35.000 What?
00:33:36.000 All of his trainings.
00:33:38.000 I mean, I needed to become, I wasn't that strong person.
00:33:42.000 I was more like my dad, and I needed to become who I wanted to be.
00:33:48.000 I wanted a woman to trust me that I can sustain no matter what.
00:33:54.000 And I have a feeling there's my wife.
00:33:57.000 Did you meet your wife in Missouri?
00:33:59.000 No, she is from Ukraine.
00:34:02.000 That's an interesting.
00:34:04.000 You have a one year old?
00:34:05.000 Dude, it's time to get you on some peptides.
00:34:08.000 That's crazy.
00:34:09.000 You're 75, you have a one year old?
00:34:10.000 I do.
00:34:11.000 We've got to go to work on you.
00:34:12.000 We've got to keep you alive.
00:34:15.000 That's nuts.
00:34:17.000 It's wonderful.
00:34:18.000 You're almost 20 years older than me, and you have a one year old.
00:34:20.000 That's crazy.
00:34:21.000 Well, I'm excited.
00:34:23.000 That's crazy.
00:34:24.000 I'm excited because.
00:34:26.000 I figured that I figured out something.
00:34:29.000 So, the way, so I was, you'll get a kick out of it.
00:34:35.000 So, I was married to an American woman, then I was dating other women.
00:34:41.000 It wasn't happening.
00:34:42.000 So, I took my kids, grown kids, to Ukraine, and I want them to show, I'm from Odessa, all right?
00:34:53.000 So, went there with them.
00:34:56.000 They were like probably in their 20s.
00:34:59.000 And so, and on the way back, I forgot my passport on the plane from Odessa to Kiev, and I had to stay behind for a day to get a temporary passport.
00:35:12.000 So I went to a park and I was waiting for this.
00:35:18.000 And I see this lunchtime, and these gorgeous women are going to lunch and back.
00:35:26.000 And I feel like I'm in Paris watching a runway show.
00:35:30.000 I mean, it's like beautiful women.
00:35:34.000 And I'm going, I can relate to that.
00:35:37.000 I would like one of those women.
00:35:40.000 Wait a minute.
00:35:41.000 But how old are you at this time?
00:35:42.000 That was.
00:35:43.000 10 years ago, so 65.
00:35:46.000 And how old are these ladies?
00:35:49.000 Well, my wife is 42, so.
00:35:51.000 But in their 20s, 30s.
00:35:56.000 42 and 75 doesn't seem offensive for whatever reason.
00:36:00.000 You know what I mean?
00:36:02.000 Like 20 and.
00:36:04.000 What would be the equivalent?
00:36:06.000 Well, I wasn't looking.
00:36:08.000 I wasn't looking.
00:36:09.000 I wasn't a playboy.
00:36:10.000 I was looking for a wife.
00:36:11.000 I believe I had a. 1.00
00:36:13.000 But women don't care about that. 1.00
00:36:14.000 If they find out that a man is like that much older than a woman, they kind of get. 0.89
00:36:18.000 Well, it probably in that culture is a little bit different than American culture.
00:36:23.000 And so, what I did, I said, okay, how do I do that?
00:36:27.000 So, I went to Ukraine and I tried to meet women through like agencies that introduce people.
00:36:36.000 It wasn't working a couple of times.
00:36:39.000 Then I decided I'm going to just hire three different agencies at the same time and I'm just going to go for two weeks.
00:36:46.000 And I had 51 dates.
00:36:49.000 So, you went to Ukraine just to meet a woman?
00:36:51.000 I went to look for a wife. 0.96
00:36:53.000 It wasn't a woman. 1.00
00:36:55.000 That's what I mean. 1.00
00:36:55.000 It was just. 1.00
00:36:56.000 It has to be a woman. 1.00
00:36:57.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:36:59.000 And so, yeah, so that's what happened.
00:37:03.000 And I would just have breakfast, lunch, and dinner with different ladies.
00:37:08.000 And it didn't take me very long because I had all that training and education.
00:37:12.000 I was new.
00:37:14.000 And I was looking for a woman who has a father.
00:37:22.000 That is really good for her.
00:37:24.000 I mean, I knew that if the father, if they're afraid of masculine energy, if they're being with the abusive dad or something is not right, they will not trust my energy.
00:37:38.000 And that was the handshake I could tell pretty much if that woman and all 51 dates were, it didn't work.
00:37:48.000 I mean, I just knew in a couple of seconds that it wasn't right, but then I have to eat, you know, so I gained weight. 0.90
00:37:56.000 Just because I had to eat all this time, three meals a day.
00:38:00.000 And anyway.
00:38:01.000 You were going out with three different girls a day to try to find a wife?
00:38:04.000 Yeah.
00:38:05.000 That sounds kind of crazy.
00:38:08.000 Well, so then.
00:38:09.000 Does that sound a little crazy?
00:38:12.000 So then I go, it didn't work, right?
00:38:14.000 So what do I do?
00:38:15.000 So now I decide I'm going to do a seminar in Kiev on relationships because I was teaching at Missouri State University.
00:38:27.000 At that time, so a professor from America is going to teach this course on relationships and laughter, right?
00:38:35.000 That was my hook.
00:38:37.000 And I feel like. 0.69
00:38:38.000 But you did this all just to meet women.
00:38:39.000 Yeah, yes, I did.
00:38:42.000 Well, I'm not ashamed of it because I was very focused.
00:38:47.000 It's pragmatic.
00:38:49.000 Very focused.
00:38:50.000 Very focused.
00:38:50.000 A good strategy.
00:38:51.000 It seems like the same strategy that led you to serve breakfast in Branson.
00:38:56.000 You're an industrialist out of the Soviet Union. 0.70
00:38:59.000 You find solutions. 0.98
00:39:00.000 Exactly.
00:39:00.000 Exactly.
00:39:02.000 So then I need somebody to promote this and to find a venue and bring women.
00:39:11.000 But the logic was that the women who will come to a seminar are different kinds of women that go to those agencies.
00:39:23.000 Those agencies, they're hunting for somebody from outside the country, they're looking for somebody.
00:39:29.000 These women were just wanted to know more about relationships.
00:39:34.000 So, what do you mean they're hunting for someone outside the country?
00:39:36.000 So, they're trying to escape Ukraine?
00:39:38.000 That's what they're doing.
00:39:38.000 Yeah.
00:39:39.000 So, they're trying to find a husband that's going to take them out.
00:39:42.000 Exactly.
00:39:43.000 Exactly.
00:39:43.000 So, they're more in a masculine energy.
00:39:46.000 They're more like, I'm going to get somebody.
00:39:49.000 And I wasn't into that.
00:39:50.000 I wasn't interested.
00:39:52.000 So, someone recommended this lady who can do this, promote this.
00:39:59.000 And it was my future wife.
00:40:01.000 It was my Olivia, who I'm now married to.
00:40:05.000 And when I met her and she promoted this, I already knew that I didn't need the seminar.
00:40:13.000 I just, I met somebody that I really wanted to be with.
00:40:20.000 And it didn't, it wasn't immediate because we're age different.
00:40:24.000 So at first I was like, what?
00:40:26.000 What are you talking about?
00:40:28.000 And I wasn't, I was just professional and doing this professionally.
00:40:33.000 But little by little we started learning about each other.
00:40:37.000 And then I, I invited her to America, proposed to her on her birthday, and I had her balloon ride.
00:40:46.000 I mean, I was, you know.
00:40:48.000 Very romantic, young girl.
00:40:50.000 That way, she could not get out that way.
00:40:50.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:40:54.000 I could give her that.
00:40:55.000 Wow.
00:40:56.000 Yeah.
00:40:56.000 Yeah, that is a creepy place to propose.
00:40:59.000 To propose.
00:41:00.000 Well, like you're already scared.
00:41:01.000 You're prepared.
00:41:03.000 You're going to take care of me, please?
00:41:06.000 But I put a big banner on the ground.
00:41:09.000 Will you marry me?
00:41:11.000 And.
00:41:11.000 Aw.
00:41:12.000 And she didn't know how to read English, so she that's hilarious.
00:41:16.000 She did not say yes.
00:41:19.000 Uh, and then I opened the ring, and you know, and then she said yes.
00:41:24.000 So, um, does she speak Russian?
00:41:26.000 Is that what they speak in Ukraine?
00:41:28.000 Yeah, primarily, primarily.
00:41:29.000 Is there a Ukrainian language?
00:41:31.000 Yeah, there is.
00:41:32.000 There is.
00:41:32.000 That's the tension between two sides of Ukraine.
00:41:37.000 One is very Western, very Ukrainian, the other one is Russian speaking, and they, uh, Russian speaking don't mind. 0.98
00:41:47.000 The other side does mine.
00:41:48.000 So, yeah.
00:41:50.000 Got it.
00:41:50.000 Got it.
00:41:51.000 Got it.
00:41:52.000 Well, it's like, what was it like starting out doing stand up in the Soviet Union?
00:41:58.000 That's where you started, right?
00:41:59.000 Yeah.
00:41:59.000 How old were you?
00:42:00.000 I was 15.
00:42:02.000 And what is it like over there when you're 15?
00:42:04.000 Is there like a version of The Tonight Show in Russia?
00:42:08.000 Well, no, it's a lot.
00:42:11.000 At those days, you know, it was very.
00:42:16.000 Structured, very Communist Party controlled.
00:42:20.000 So there was only like two comedians in the whole country that were government approved.
00:42:27.000 So they would be on the radio and television, and nobody else was really doing comedy.
00:42:35.000 So.
00:42:35.000 What were the comedians like?
00:42:37.000 For some reason?
00:42:38.000 More like vaudeville.
00:42:39.000 What kind of names?
00:42:41.000 Arkady Raikin.
00:42:43.000 You could probably Google him, Arkady Raikin.
00:42:46.000 He was the.
00:42:47.000 Main guy that I would listen to, and in each apartment, there would be a little speaker that would be on all the time so they could brainwash you.
00:43:00.000 You had a speaker in your apartment all the time.
00:43:05.000 Yeah.
00:43:07.000 Wow.
00:43:07.000 Wow.
00:43:09.000 So, but then on Sunday mornings.
00:43:11.000 This is what, 66?
00:43:14.000 Yeah.
00:43:14.000 Yeah.
00:43:15.000 I'm 51.
00:43:16.000 So, yeah.
00:43:17.000 Yeah.
00:43:17.000 That's about that time.
00:43:20.000 Yeah, that was the guy.
00:43:22.000 Wow.
00:43:23.000 That was the guy.
00:43:24.000 Very famous.
00:43:26.000 The only people from America that we saw were Charlie Chaplin, and that's it.
00:43:32.000 Just Charlie Chaplin?
00:43:33.000 So you thought America was just silent movies?
00:43:33.000 Charlie Chaplin.
00:43:36.000 Well, they portrayed it.
00:43:40.000 Oh, he did a Charlie Chaplin impersonation.
00:43:43.000 Wow.
00:43:44.000 Yeah.
00:43:46.000 So. 1.00
00:43:47.000 He's got wax wigs and shit. 1.00
00:43:49.000 I would listen to his. 0.99
00:43:52.000 So every other Sunday or every once a month, he would have a different monologue that was written and approved by the Communist Party.
00:44:02.000 Yeah, so I was really into it.
00:44:05.000 So I would record it, and we had a big tape recorder like this, and I would record it and memorize it.
00:44:14.000 And because there was nothing to be approved, because it's already been approved, then I would go to like a club in my school and I would.
00:44:25.000 Tell jokes, his jokes, and people knew that it was his jokes, but they would laugh.
00:44:31.000 And that's how I got my understanding that I really wanted to do that.
00:44:38.000 Wow.
00:44:39.000 Yeah.
00:44:41.000 And little by little, then I went to the military and I did that there, kind of as an amateur.
00:44:49.000 And then.
00:44:50.000 So you did stand up for the military?
00:44:53.000 Yeah.
00:44:53.000 Yeah.
00:44:54.000 But it would be just.
00:44:56.000 Like holidays, like if it was May Day or October Revolution, they would look to me to entertain.
00:45:04.000 So I would do that.
00:45:06.000 And then I went to, came out of the military, went to college for an art degree.
00:45:12.000 My parents didn't think that I could do anything.
00:45:15.000 Comedy would not be like, nobody even thought that that's even a possibility.
00:45:23.000 And so I kept doing it and then started working on the.
00:45:28.000 Soviet cruise ships.
00:45:31.000 And they had in the Black Sea Soviet cruise ships.
00:45:35.000 So I went, they asked me to go and perform there on the cruise ship.
00:45:42.000 Yeah, you're like, really?
00:45:44.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:45:46.000 So it was.
00:45:47.000 How old were you at the time?
00:45:48.000 I was 20, 21.
00:45:51.000 Okay.
00:45:51.000 Yeah.
00:45:53.000 Now I'm getting paid and I'm getting a cabin and now.
00:45:59.000 Prior to that, I lived in a communal apartment with my parents in the same room till I was 26 years old.
00:46:06.000 Whoa.
00:46:07.000 So, yeah. 0.53
00:46:08.000 So, no phone, nine families.
00:46:11.000 What if your parents wanted to get frisky?
00:46:12.000 They tell you to go walk?
00:46:14.000 Go look out the window.
00:46:16.000 Go look out the window?
00:46:18.000 Well, I joke about this.
00:46:19.000 Oh, okay, okay.
00:46:20.000 Yeah.
00:46:21.000 And then they say, What do you see in the window? 0.99
00:46:24.000 I might jump out that fucking window. 0.99
00:46:27.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:46:28.000 And they say, What do you see in the window?
00:46:30.000 I said, Our neighbor's being frisky.
00:46:32.000 And And they say, How can you tell?
00:46:34.000 I said, Because their son is looking at me.
00:46:37.000 So that's the joke I tell.
00:46:40.000 But that was my life.
00:46:43.000 And here, all of a sudden, I'm introduced to this.
00:46:48.000 So, tourists from other countries would take those cruises around the Black Sea.
00:46:55.000 And all of a sudden, I'm introduced to this group of people that I was not allowed to talk to foreigners. 0.99
00:47:02.000 We were not allowed to even talk to them.
00:47:03.000 What countries were they from?
00:47:05.000 Germany, Britain, some Americans, some Australians, Yugoslavians, whatever, from.
00:47:15.000 Soviet bloc.
00:47:18.000 Who was the president of or the.
00:47:22.000 Brezhnev was the president at that time, yeah.
00:47:25.000 And so I started, so I did one week of performances, and then they said, Would you like to stay on board?
00:47:36.000 And I said, Can I bring my parents with me?
00:47:43.000 Can we give another cabin for them?
00:47:46.000 And they said, No, you don't get any special privileges.
00:47:49.000 We have hundreds of people like you.
00:47:51.000 Get out.
00:47:52.000 And I was like, Okay.
00:47:54.000 So I left.
00:47:56.000 And a couple of hours later, a messenger comes.
00:48:00.000 We have no phone.
00:48:01.000 So it's like a messenger comes and brings two sets of tickets for me and my parents.
00:48:09.000 And I never heard that it's even possible, like that they would go back on their word.
00:48:16.000 So I go on the cruise and.
00:48:18.000 Um, and the uh, I go to a cruise director, I said, What happened?
00:48:23.000 And he said, Well, here's what happened these ships normally are rented to European companies for like nine months out of the year.
00:48:33.000 And we learned from them that if somebody is valuable, we give them more uh perks.
00:48:43.000 Um, the captain liked your performance and he told them the company that even if You have to give him my own cabin.
00:48:52.000 I want him on the ship.
00:48:55.000 And the light bulb went in my head.
00:48:57.000 I said, Wait a minute, wait a minute.
00:48:58.000 Are you saying that in the capitalistic world, if you're more talented, you get more things?
00:49:07.000 And they go, Yeah.
00:49:09.000 That was, it's hard to imagine.
00:49:12.000 It was like, changed my life.
00:49:13.000 Well, it's hard to imagine for people that didn't grow up in the environment that you grew up with a speaker in your apartment.
00:49:20.000 Yeah.
00:49:20.000 Like just you saying that to me, my mind is rattled.
00:49:23.000 I was like, oh my God.
00:49:24.000 Like they could just broadcast in your apartment anytime they wanted.
00:49:28.000 Yeah.
00:49:29.000 What a great way to brainwash people.
00:49:31.000 And they would jam, like, because we had a big radio and they would jam Voice of America.
00:49:40.000 But my dad would wake up, like, in the middle of the night.
00:49:45.000 He was wanting to know what's happening out there.
00:49:48.000 And he would sit there and listen to that quietly.
00:49:52.000 And I remember as a kid, I asked dad, what are you listening to in the middle of the night?
00:49:57.000 And he goes, shh, don't let neighbors hear us.
00:50:00.000 This is the voice of America.
00:50:02.000 We're not allowed to listen to it.
00:50:04.000 Wow.
00:50:05.000 You had to keep it secret?
00:50:06.000 Yeah, but at nighttime.
00:50:08.000 How did he listen to it?
00:50:09.000 Just quiet, just sat there.
00:50:11.000 Right, but if they jammed it, how did he listen?
00:50:13.000 No, they would jam it during the day, but at nighttime, they didn't think anybody would wake up at 3 o'clock in the morning and sit there and listen to it.
00:50:21.000 How do they jam it?
00:50:23.000 It's just.
00:50:25.000 I don't know.
00:50:26.000 How's it going to say that again?
00:50:27.000 Yeah.
00:50:28.000 I don't know.
00:50:30.000 So they had some way to jam that sound.
00:50:32.000 Whatever signal.
00:50:32.000 Yeah.
00:50:33.000 Exactly.
00:50:34.000 Exactly.
00:50:35.000 It's shortwave, so it goes in and out anyway.
00:50:35.000 Yeah.
00:50:38.000 What did he get out of listening to Voice of America?
00:50:41.000 Like, what was he?
00:50:42.000 Did he talk about it?
00:50:43.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:50:45.000 I would then start also waking up and listening.
00:50:49.000 And it would be just a standard American thing.
00:50:52.000 Give me your tired, your hungry, your poor, something like that.
00:50:57.000 And, you know, and they would, that there's a Statue of Liberty waiting to greet you if you come to the United States.
00:51:06.000 And he would always say, you know, this would be something that I would love you to experience.
00:51:14.000 And, um, And my mom was, she hated that because she was afraid that we'll get in trouble.
00:51:22.000 And so she didn't want to even talk about this.
00:51:24.000 So if I drew a picture as a kid, I would draw a picture of Statue of Liberty.
00:51:30.000 And she would like, don't do that.
00:51:32.000 Don't let anybody see this.
00:51:33.000 We'll get in trouble.
00:51:36.000 And when after I experienced the cruises and got to know this different environment, I came home and I go, Mom, Dad, I think we should consider trying to.
00:51:49.000 To get out of, and mom was like mad at my dad.
00:51:54.000 And my dad stood up, which was good for him at that time.
00:51:58.000 Normally he would just be quiet, but he said to my mom, Clara, don't you, would you like your son, when he is my age, sit there by the radio and listen to a voice of America, hoping, wishing that he would be doing something like that?
00:52:16.000 Or would you like him to be in America doing this?
00:52:21.000 And my mom kind of went, You know what's going to happen when we apply for a visa?
00:52:29.000 People who are considered your friends will cross the street and they will not want to talk to you and be seen with you, and you're going to go through hell.
00:52:43.000 And my dad said, Yeah, we will.
00:52:47.000 And she said, Well, if you're willing to do it, so am I.
00:52:52.000 And that's all you had to do is apply for a visa?
00:52:54.000 Well, what was happening at that time, Jimmy Carter was the president here, and he wanted to see some human rights in the Soviet Union.
00:53:07.000 And the Soviet leadership was starving, they didn't have food, so they needed food from America.
00:53:16.000 So Jimmy Carter made a deal that we're going to give you grain and you allow people to get out. 0.62
00:53:24.000 And that's how we were kind of exchanged for some wheat.
00:53:29.000 You know, that's how we got out.
00:53:31.000 Wow. 1.00
00:53:32.000 Holy shit, man. 1.00
00:53:34.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:53:36.000 Yeah.
00:53:37.000 You sometimes need to be reminded how fortunate you are.
00:53:42.000 You know, Americans in particular, we're very, you know, it's not our fault.
00:53:48.000 People become accustomed to where they live.
00:53:50.000 Yeah.
00:53:51.000 And they think this is normal, which is one of the reasons why this.
00:53:55.000 Push towards communism amongst young people is so infuriating to me.
00:53:59.000 It's like I understand that it comes from this desire for empathy and kindness.
00:54:05.000 I get that.
00:54:06.000 The idea of socialism comes from an idea of empathy and kindness that you want, you think the world would be better if we all shared, and that why are there people that are so rich and people that are so poor?
00:54:16.000 And you're right.
00:54:18.000 But the solution is not to make the government decide who gets what because they never decide the right way, they do what people do.
00:54:28.000 What people do when they have power is they enact total control over the population so that they can maintain power, and then they live in luxury, and then you wait in line for bread. 0.97
00:54:37.000 That's how it is all over the fucking world. 0.99
00:54:39.000 And if you step out of line, they shoot you. 1.00
00:54:41.000 That's where communism goes.
00:54:43.000 So, what we need is like a more moral and ethical version of capitalism.
00:54:50.000 So, we need capitalism but with empathy.
00:54:52.000 Capitalism but with philanthropy.
00:54:54.000 Like real philanthropy.
00:54:55.000 Not like scams where you find out that 90% of the money is actually going to all the people that work there.
00:55:04.000 We need to figure out a way to be more empathetic as a culture, but recognize that.
00:55:07.000 The pursuit of freedom and the ability to have freedom is so huge and it's such a great gift.
00:55:12.000 We're so lucky that we have this experiment in self government that is the United States of America and that we were, at least I was born here.
00:55:20.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:55:21.000 We're lucky as shit, you know, and don't throw that away because it's not good enough. 0.95
00:55:26.000 Don't throw that away because it's not perfect. 0.98
00:55:26.000 Right. 0.98
00:55:29.000 You're not going to get perfect with human beings, but this is the best system.
00:55:34.000 Is it corrupt?
00:55:35.000 A hundred percent.
00:55:36.000 That should be fixed.
00:55:36.000 Yeah.
00:55:38.000 The corruption should be fixed and guardrails should be put in place and maybe more.
00:55:42.000 Regulations in regard to some things should be put in place, but the purpose of this whole thing is to allow people to have freedom to do whatever they want.
00:55:51.000 And that's not ubiquitous in the world, that's not everywhere.
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00:56:55.000 No, no.
00:56:57.000 And I've been kind of a poster boy child for American Dream in a way.
00:57:03.000 Look at your phone.
00:57:07.000 Look at that phone case.
00:57:08.000 If I had that on, people would call me a fascist.
00:57:12.000 We have a giant American flag.
00:57:14.000 In Branson, yeah.
00:57:15.000 In Branson, that's not.
00:57:17.000 That flag to me doesn't represent whoever is in.
00:57:20.000 It didn't represent Biden when he was in office.
00:57:22.000 It didn't represent Obama.
00:57:24.000 It didn't represent Trump.
00:57:26.000 That represents all of us, right and left, independent, black, white, Asian, Russian, fill in the blanks, Filipino, everybody from everywhere.
00:57:36.000 Who cares?
00:57:37.000 It's America.
00:57:38.000 This is America.
00:57:38.000 This is the great melting pot.
00:57:40.000 And that's how we really should be.
00:57:42.000 And that flag shouldn't represent some people think the flag represents racism or colonialism.
00:57:47.000 Like, come on, stop.
00:57:49.000 That flag represents hope.
00:57:50.000 And if you were a kid like Yakov Smirnov, is that your real name?
00:57:55.000 No, no.
00:57:56.000 What's the real name? 0.98
00:57:56.000 Pokhis. 0.98
00:57:57.000 Say that again? 1.00
00:57:58.000 That's why.
00:58:01.000 Pokhis, P O K H I S, is my real name.
00:58:05.000 But I was a bartender, bar boy at first when I came here.
00:58:11.000 And my first job was a bar boy in the Grossinger's Hotel in the Catskills.
00:58:18.000 Oh, wow.
00:58:19.000 Yeah.
00:58:20.000 What year was this?
00:58:21.000 77.
00:58:22.000 Who did you get to see perform there?
00:58:24.000 Oh, Freddie Roman.
00:58:25.000 Wow.
00:58:26.000 Eddie Fisher.
00:58:28.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:58:29.000 Freddie Roman, old school, baby.
00:58:31.000 Yeah, old school.
00:58:32.000 I was learning.
00:58:33.000 Red Skelton, did you see those guys?
00:58:34.000 Uh huh, I did.
00:58:35.000 Later, later in Atlantic City.
00:58:38.000 But yeah, yeah, I was learning English.
00:58:43.000 I was learning about Chapaquitic or stuff like that.
00:58:48.000 I was like, what is that?
00:58:50.000 You know, so I was definitely learning English there.
00:58:55.000 Have you ever seen the television show on Amazon, The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel?
00:59:00.000 It's really good, man.
00:59:02.000 Yeah, the first scene, the first season, rather, is incredible.
00:59:06.000 It's about a young woman.
00:59:08.000 Who's married and decides to become a stand up comedian?
00:59:13.000 Like, she's married with kids, the whole deal, and she decides to do stand up.
00:59:17.000 And part of what she does, she does some stand up, like in the Catskills.
00:59:21.000 Interesting.
00:59:22.000 And, like, that is for people that don't know stand up, there's like stand up comedy as an art form is a very new art form.
00:59:30.000 Very new in terms of human history.
00:59:30.000 Yeah.
00:59:32.000 Yes.
00:59:33.000 It's only existed like in this form that we call stand up, where you have comedy clubs and stuff like that.
00:59:37.000 It's only existed like that since the 60s.
00:59:39.000 Yeah.
00:59:40.000 It's true.
00:59:41.000 It's vaudeville pretty much started that, right?
00:59:44.000 Yeah.
00:59:45.000 It's a different form, but that was, I was learning from those.
00:59:50.000 But a big part of it was the Catskills.
00:59:51.000 Yes.
00:59:52.000 A big part of it because people from New York and Pennsylvania would go into the Poconos or the Catskills, and they would do that on summer vacation, and people would get jobs there, and comedians would go and book themselves at these places.
01:00:06.000 Exactly.
01:00:06.000 It was a big deal.
01:00:08.000 It was.
01:00:08.000 It was.
01:00:09.000 And I didn't know.
01:00:12.000 About that.
01:00:13.000 So, you just got a job there.
01:00:16.000 Well, how would happen?
01:00:17.000 I decided I need to learn English.
01:00:19.000 I didn't speak English, right?
01:00:21.000 So, to start with.
01:00:23.000 So, how do I learn English?
01:00:25.000 And I thought maybe if I can be a bartender, because on the cruise ships, bar was in the same proximity as the stage was.
01:00:34.000 So, I figured it's the same people coming to enjoy the evening and I can talk to them individually and learn English.
01:00:42.000 That was my.
01:00:44.000 Clever idea, right?
01:00:46.000 And so I went and got a bartending degree, it's called degree of mixology.
01:00:54.000 In New York, there was a makeshift school on Fifth Avenue, two weeks, $200, and you get the degree of being a mixologist.
01:01:06.000 And I don't speak English, but I collected that's $200, got the degree.
01:01:12.000 And they promised you to get a job, right?
01:01:15.000 So, first job, they got me.
01:01:19.000 There was a restaurant in Lincoln Center called Monk's Inn.
01:01:23.000 And it was, you dress as a monk, and it's a French restaurant.
01:01:29.000 And you don't have to speak.
01:01:30.000 You're a waiter, but you don't have to speak.
01:01:33.000 It was perfect.
01:01:35.000 And then the same school said they're requesting some bar boy in the Catskills at the Grossingers Hotel.
01:01:46.000 And I didn't know anything about it.
01:01:48.000 And on my day off, I went upstate New York.
01:01:54.000 And went, walked into this place, and it was gorgeous.
01:01:58.000 It was a beautiful bar, like an 18 bartenders or whatever.
01:02:03.000 It's huge.
01:02:04.000 And then a 2,000 seat theater.
01:02:08.000 And when I saw it in my brain, I said, I don't care what they pay me, I want to work here.
01:02:16.000 And so I took that job, and actually, I was.
01:02:23.000 I was nervous because I didn't know that I can quit the other job because they just gave it to me like a week ago.
01:02:31.000 And so I go back and I'm so nervous.
01:02:31.000 Right.
01:02:35.000 I go to the manager.
01:02:36.000 I go, I know this is, you gave me a break, but there is an opportunity here.
01:02:44.000 And he said, Yaakov, it's America.
01:02:50.000 You should take the opportunity.
01:02:52.000 And if you ever need the job, you get it here.
01:02:56.000 And I was like, Rocky.
01:02:57.000 I was like, was he calling you Yaakov?
01:03:01.000 Was he calling you?
01:03:02.000 You'd already used that name?
01:03:03.000 Yaakov is my real name.
01:03:05.000 Yaakov is my real name.
01:03:07.000 But you said it wasn't your real name.
01:03:08.000 Pokis is my last name.
01:03:10.000 Oh, okay.
01:03:11.000 Yaakov is my real name.
01:03:12.000 So I took.
01:03:14.000 Yaakov Pokis was the name?
01:03:15.000 Yes, Yaakov Pokis was.
01:03:16.000 Yes, do Smirnov?
01:03:19.000 And people could not pronounce my name.
01:03:22.000 So in the bar, I would see that they can say, I'll have some Smirnov.
01:03:28.000 And I'm going, hmm, maybe that's a good name.
01:03:33.000 And it stuck.
01:03:34.000 And Yaakov Smirnov became my name.
01:03:36.000 That makes sense.
01:03:36.000 That makes sense.
01:03:37.000 Yeah.
01:03:37.000 But when you think about how many different people in show business changed their names back then, that was a super common thing.
01:03:44.000 Like, you didn't keep the name that you were, if you had a goofy name, like Arnold Schwarzenegger was a groundbreaker because he was like one of the first guys to say, regardless of whether or not you could spell my name or even say, that's my name, I'm going to keep that name.
01:03:56.000 Right.
01:03:57.000 So many people changed their names and made their name sound more appealing. 1.00
01:04:02.000 Well, mine kind of worked because Yaks is like jokes. 1.00
01:04:07.000 Right. 0.65
01:04:08.000 And Smirnoff kind of makes people happy.
01:04:11.000 Right.
01:04:12.000 So it kind of worked.
01:04:13.000 Oh, it works great.
01:04:14.000 Yeah.
01:04:14.000 It's a great idea.
01:04:15.000 So you're a young kid and you're at these Catskill shows.
01:04:15.000 Yeah.
01:04:19.000 How long did you work there?
01:04:22.000 Not very long, about eight, maybe seven, eight months.
01:04:27.000 And did you slowly learn English when you were there?
01:04:30.000 I was learning English and I was translating jokes and I would try them on the audience or my customers.
01:04:37.000 And I would just tell a joke.
01:04:38.000 And if they laughed, then I knew that I. I'm understood.
01:04:43.000 And if they didn't laugh or I didn't get a tip, then it wasn't working.
01:04:48.000 So that was my gauge.
01:04:50.000 And you were a bus boy when you were a bus boy?
01:04:53.000 I was a bar boy.
01:04:54.000 Bar boy, I'm just.
01:04:55.000 Bar boy, I'm just.
01:04:56.000 Bringing ice and mixing pina coladas, whatever.
01:05:00.000 And then became a bartender.
01:05:03.000 And then I would ask the guy, I asked the guy who was the manager of the main room.
01:05:13.000 Barry Wise, his name, and he.
01:05:16.000 I asked him if I could try my comedy.
01:05:23.000 And he said, No, you can't do it in this room, but in the lobby in afternoons, they have a game with older people, Simon Says.
01:05:36.000 And the guy who is the master of ceremonies there will probably let you do a couple of minutes of stand up.
01:05:48.000 So I did.
01:05:50.000 I walked on stage and I, that's a little stage in the lobby, and I'm telling a couple of jokes.
01:05:57.000 And some woman on the back started, I thought she was laughing.
01:06:01.000 It was like, she had seizures.
01:06:07.000 And I didn't know.
01:06:09.000 And I'm thinking, I'm doing well.
01:06:11.000 And they're getting her on a herni out of there, and people coming over and saying, You were killing.
01:06:19.000 You were killing.
01:06:20.000 I'm going, no, no, I wasn't killing.
01:06:23.000 The whole thing was, but at least I told a couple of jokes and that gave me some confidence.
01:06:29.000 And then I did a couple of shows in Catcherizing Star, which wasn't very good for me.
01:06:37.000 In New York?
01:06:38.000 In New York, yeah.
01:06:41.000 And then I was working as a shipping manager in a company called Greeting Bells, and just to make some money.
01:06:50.000 And the lady said, I know somebody in Hollywood.
01:06:57.000 His name is Ted Bergman.
01:06:58.000 He is the producer, executive producer of Trees Company, which was a huge show at that time.
01:07:04.000 Sure.
01:07:05.000 He said, If you go to Hollywood, I can arrange a meeting.
01:07:10.000 And I said, Okay, I'll go.
01:07:14.000 So I had a plan.
01:07:16.000 I bought a ticket for 10 days to go to Hollywood, become a star, and then come back to New York.
01:07:25.000 And buy Fifth Avenue apartment for my parents.
01:07:29.000 That was my desire.
01:07:32.000 It's crazy, right?
01:07:33.000 But I go, okay, he's an executive producer of Tree's company.
01:07:37.000 He'll put me in the show.
01:07:38.000 I'll become a star right away.
01:07:41.000 I know, it's crazy, right?
01:07:44.000 But I really was that naive, right?
01:07:47.000 So I go there, and Ted Bergman says, I would like to see you perform.
01:07:53.000 So I need to find a spot.
01:07:55.000 And I go to the comedy store and I get on the open mic.
01:08:03.000 And then the message comes that he is not going to make it.
01:08:09.000 But I'm already committed, so I'm doing my five minutes.
01:08:14.000 And I'm bombed because now it's day four, and I'm not even close to getting a television show.
01:08:25.000 So I'm walking away, and I'm on sunset.
01:08:31.000 This girl, Chrissy, her name was Mitzi's secretary at that time.
01:08:37.000 And she runs after me and she goes, Yaakov, Yaakov, congratulations.
01:08:41.000 And I go, why?
01:08:42.000 I mean, the guy didn't show up.
01:08:45.000 And she goes, no, Mitzi liked you.
01:08:49.000 And I go, who is Mitzi?
01:08:52.000 I know, I know, it's silly to see in front of her portrait.
01:08:57.000 And she goes, she owns the comedy store, go talk to her.
01:09:01.000 So I go sit down next to her in that booth that is next to the original room, and I have no idea who I'm talking to, but and she says, You are very funny.
01:09:18.000 Stay in Los Angeles, there's always a place for good and different.
01:09:25.000 And I'm again, I'm like, Okay, I said, I'm sorry, but I, you know, I have parents in.
01:09:34.000 In LA, in New York, and I need to go back because they rely on me.
01:09:42.000 And she goes, So, what does your dad do?
01:09:46.000 And I go, He's a building construction engineer.
01:09:50.000 And she goes, Can he be a carpenter?
01:09:56.000 And I go, I think so.
01:09:58.000 And she goes, Okay, why don't you bring him here?
01:10:03.000 I'll give him a job.
01:10:05.000 I like your Mitzi impression. 0.82
01:10:06.000 That's pretty close.
01:10:10.000 And she goes, And where do you live?
01:10:13.000 I go, I'm staying with some friends.
01:10:17.000 She goes, I have a house up the hill, and you can rent a room for $120 a month if you want to.
01:10:26.000 That was Crest Hill?
01:10:27.000 Crest Hill, yeah.
01:10:30.000 So I still don't know again who I'm talking to.
01:10:35.000 And she goes, And come back tomorrow and watch a regular show.
01:10:41.000 So I come back.
01:10:43.000 How old are you at this time?
01:10:45.000 I'm 26, 27 now.
01:10:48.000 Yeah.
01:10:49.000 So I go in next day and I sit in the back, and first person that Harris Pete, you probably remember.
01:10:58.000 Sure.
01:10:58.000 Yeah.
01:10:59.000 Harris Pete introduces Robin Williams first on stage.
01:11:04.000 And he was, he just hit number one show on.
01:11:08.000 Mark and Mindy?
01:11:08.000 Yeah.
01:11:09.000 Yeah.
01:11:10.000 And after him is Billy Crystal.
01:11:13.000 After him is David Letterman.
01:11:15.000 After him is Richard Pryor.
01:11:18.000 Yeah.
01:11:18.000 Wow.
01:11:19.000 Yeah, it's lined up like, and I'm sitting back there and I'm going, This is day five.
01:11:27.000 I'm ahead of schedule.
01:11:31.000 If she likes them and she likes me, I'm staying.
01:11:37.000 I don't care.
01:11:39.000 And that's how it started.
01:11:42.000 And she gave me a job.
01:11:43.000 So basically, I was helping my dad as a carpenter because she wasn't ready to perform there really.
01:11:51.000 But she believed in you.
01:11:53.000 And she gave me a break, and little by little, once a month, she would say, Why don't you go up and do what you, you know?
01:11:53.000 Yeah.
01:12:00.000 And I was practicing, I would do other clubs meantime just to get better and better and better.
01:12:09.000 And then, you know, she'd been an amazing supporter, you know, and I continued, I built a lot in the belly room, I built a lot of things in the, in, and she, my main job was to go to her house.
01:12:28.000 And uh, Paulie was a young kid who was smoking pot.
01:12:33.000 And to prevent Mitzit from walking into on him, he would take off the doorknobs of the door and he would throw them away.
01:12:43.000 And my job was to go and buy door new doorknobs and put them in, it was like a full time job, you know.
01:12:52.000 And so, yeah, she's been a blessing, a blessing for me.
01:12:57.000 Paulie's at the club this weekend.
01:12:59.000 Oh, is that right?
01:12:59.000 Yeah.
01:13:00.000 Yeah, he's on the 25th.
01:13:00.000 Oh, cool.
01:13:02.000 That's cool.
01:13:03.000 That's crazy.
01:13:04.000 Yeah.
01:13:05.000 And so, how good was your English back then?
01:13:09.000 It was getting better.
01:13:10.000 Were you taking courses?
01:13:11.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:13:13.000 I was relentless.
01:13:15.000 I would do whatever it takes to learn.
01:13:20.000 I mean, I isolated myself totally from Russian speaking, except my parents.
01:13:27.000 I was speaking to them in Russian, but everybody else I spoke in English.
01:13:31.000 So it was getting better and better.
01:13:33.000 And then little by little, I got, you know, kind of Robin got me a part at Moscow and the Hudson movie.
01:13:44.000 That was the first.
01:13:46.000 This is all in the 70s, right?
01:13:47.000 So this is probably like you arrived there, like what, 78?
01:13:50.000 78, yeah.
01:13:52.000 And then the movie was started in 82, came out in 84.
01:13:58.000 So at that point, I was doing Night Court.
01:14:01.000 A lot.
01:14:03.000 I did like seven episodes.
01:14:07.000 I could not get on a Tonight Show.
01:14:10.000 There was a producer, Jim McCauley, who didn't think that Carson's going to like me.
01:14:17.000 Right.
01:14:18.000 And so I became, and he would come every day.
01:14:22.000 Mitzi was very supportive of this.
01:14:24.000 She would have like a showcase once a year of people for him to look at.
01:14:31.000 And he would come and he would say, Carson's not going to like, he's not going to like, he's not going to like.
01:14:36.000 And on year six, he came and he said, Yaakov, let's save time for one another.
01:14:43.000 Uh, you'll get on that show when the hell freezes over, I swear.
01:14:49.000 And I so I started watching Weather Channel just well, I didn't have a shot, I mean, and and I just kind of moved on.
01:15:00.000 And then I got a Miller Lite commercial, uh, which uh became very popular.
01:15:06.000 I don't know if you can show that, Jamie.
01:15:09.000 You could probably see it.
01:15:10.000 It became really big all of a sudden.
01:15:13.000 I was during Super Bowl shown, and all of a sudden, people kind of got.
01:15:18.000 Got to know me.
01:15:24.000 And then Carson saw this commercial and he told McCauley, he said, This guy's funny.
01:15:32.000 How come we don't have him on?
01:15:35.000 And McCauley said, Oh, yeah, we were just about to get him.
01:15:39.000 And so Mitzi calls me.
01:15:41.000 I'm in Raleigh, North Carolina, in the club.
01:15:46.000 And she calls me, and I remember on the payphone, I called her back.
01:15:52.000 And I go, what's going on?
01:15:54.000 She goes, guess who, Hall?
01:15:57.000 I go, who?
01:15:58.000 McCauley. 1.00
01:15:59.000 He's such an ass. 1.00
01:16:02.000 He now wants you on the show right away. 1.00
01:16:05.000 And my gut reaction was like, I want to tell him to go shove it.
01:16:11.000 And then I go, no, no, no, I got to.
01:16:15.000 So I did the Tonight Show, and Carson liked me and called me over to the couch, which was, uh huh, yeah, which was kind of a.
01:16:28.000 A big deal at that time.
01:16:31.000 And I sat down and I said, Johnny, you know, in America, you have things we never had in Russia, like policemen have warning shots.
01:16:41.000 And he almost fell off the chair.
01:16:43.000 And we went to a commercial.
01:16:46.000 And McCauley comes over, it gets between me and Carson, and goes, Can you do another shot like this, like a couple of months from now?
01:16:56.000 I go, When the hell freezes over?
01:16:59.000 He goes, Touche, touche.
01:17:02.000 And I did six, seven, seven episodes of Carson.
01:17:06.000 And people today, young people, especially listening, don't understand what a big deal it was to be on Carson.
01:17:14.000 And I think the only thing that's close today is Kill Tony.
01:17:17.000 Yes.
01:17:18.000 Kill Tony is a place where people's careers are actually really legitimately launched.
01:17:24.000 There's a bunch of people like Cam Patterson's on SNL now.
01:17:27.000 You know, there's guys like, when I did a show, A podcast with the Black Keys.
01:17:32.000 They were asking for William Montgomery to perform.
01:17:34.000 Like, can we go see William Montgomery?
01:17:36.000 Like, there's people that are stars from that show now.
01:17:39.000 Well, I'm here with you because I did that show and here I saw you and you invited me.
01:17:39.000 Amazing.
01:17:45.000 So I'm very grateful to Tony that kind of got us.
01:17:50.000 So Tony has done that for a lot of people.
01:17:52.000 I mean, he's blown up Adam Ray.
01:17:55.000 He's blown up so many of these guys.
01:17:56.000 Yeah.
01:17:57.000 Kyle Dunnigan.
01:17:58.000 So many of these guys have taken off because of Tony.
01:18:00.000 Yeah.
01:18:01.000 It's a really amazing platform because it's just comedy.
01:18:05.000 Yeah.
01:18:06.000 You know?
01:18:06.000 Yeah, totally.
01:18:07.000 Totally.
01:18:08.000 Love it.
01:18:08.000 Like a more important platform for comedians than a regular podcast like this one because this podcast is not always comedy.
01:18:17.000 Like sometimes I'm talking to scientists, sometimes I'm talking to a lot of weird, different people.
01:18:22.000 Yeah, absolutely.
01:18:23.000 But that show is just funny.
01:18:25.000 And there was nothing like that back then.
01:18:28.000 So the closest thing to it was The Tonight Show.
01:18:30.000 And if you got on The Tonight Show and you did stand up, I mean, that was the first time I remember watching Richard Jenney was on The Tonight Show.
01:18:39.000 And there's a bunch of other people that I saw on the Tonight Show too, but everybody would stay up late at night.
01:18:43.000 And when there was a comedian on the Tonight Show, you'd get excited.
01:18:45.000 Like, oh, it was a comedian.
01:18:45.000 Yeah.
01:18:46.000 Yes.
01:18:47.000 Let's see if they're funny.
01:18:49.000 And if you were good and you were on the Tonight Show, then you could perform at clubs all over the country.
01:18:54.000 And they would say, as seen on the Tonight Show.
01:18:56.000 Oh, the Tonight Show.
01:18:57.000 Yeah.
01:18:58.000 It was a huge deal.
01:18:59.000 And if you had that credit and people had seen you.
01:19:02.000 Also back then, like, what were the numbers?
01:19:02.000 Yeah.
01:19:04.000 The numbers were crazy 30 million.
01:19:07.000 Because there was only four channels, three at the time, not even four.
01:19:07.000 Yeah.
01:19:10.000 Fox didn't even exist yet.
01:19:12.000 Yeah.
01:19:12.000 So there were three channels, and a huge percentage of the country was watching this one thing.
01:19:17.000 Yes.
01:19:18.000 Yeah.
01:19:19.000 I was very blessed.
01:19:20.000 Isn't that crazy?
01:19:21.000 Yeah.
01:19:22.000 30 million.
01:19:23.000 Yeah.
01:19:24.000 And one time I offered them, he loved to do impressions of Reagan, Carson.
01:19:32.000 He was, and I offered them to do a skit of me as an interpreter, he is Reagan, and then had a Gorbachev lookalike.
01:19:44.000 And it was a huge hit.
01:19:45.000 It was really very, very well received.
01:19:49.000 So, and that's another interesting thing that, you know, like when I met Reagan, I was still fairly unknown.
01:20:02.000 And I was playing a club in Washington, D.C., and it was called Comedy Cafe.
01:20:10.000 And somebody came over to me after the show, and a guy, I didn't know who he was, and he said, I'm having President Reagan and Nancy Reagan as my guests, dinner guests, at my home in two weeks.
01:20:28.000 I would like to invite you to be one of the guests. 0.84
01:20:32.000 And I'm thinking, this guy's nuts. 0.97
01:20:34.000 Who is this? 0.98
01:20:35.000 And he was chief editor of the Washington Times newspaper.
01:20:41.000 And the reason I brought this up because he sent me tickets.
01:20:48.000 I come back.
01:20:49.000 And then this is like a.
01:20:51.000 Seen from like a diehard or something, we're pulling into his house, towards his house.
01:20:59.000 There's two helicopters hanging over the neighborhood.
01:21:03.000 There's FBI everywhere.
01:21:05.000 And I'm going, this is going to be a mess.
01:21:10.000 They won't let me in.
01:21:12.000 I just didn't think it's possible.
01:21:14.000 So they get him out of the car, they frisk him, they ask for his IDs.
01:21:19.000 And he said, I'm the owner of the place where the president is going to dinner.
01:21:23.000 And they said, We don't care.
01:21:25.000 So they get him and then they shine the light.
01:21:28.000 I'm sitting in the passenger seat and they shine the light on me.
01:21:36.000 And the guy goes, Miller Light commercial, right?
01:21:41.000 Go in.
01:21:43.000 Wow.
01:21:45.000 That's how I met the president.
01:21:46.000 And then it was the moment we met each other, it's like locked in, like in the same.
01:21:55.000 And all of a sudden, he was like, Have you heard this joke?
01:21:59.000 And he starts telling me Russian jokes.
01:22:02.000 And then it was back and forth.
01:22:04.000 And so 18 people in the room, and everybody's laughing, and that's how it started that relationship.
01:22:11.000 Wow.
01:22:12.000 That's crazy.
01:22:13.000 Yeah.
01:22:15.000 And then I get a call from his Dana Rohrbacher, who was his head speechwriter.
01:22:21.000 And he calls me a couple of weeks later and he said, Reagan is going to go to Russia to meet with Gorbachev.
01:22:27.000 He is going to do a speech in front of all the Russian politicians in the University of Moscow.
01:22:35.000 He would like you to write some jokes for his speech.
01:22:38.000 And this is like insane for me to hear this.
01:22:41.000 I'm going, if something doesn't go right, I don't have any countries to go to.
01:22:48.000 This is like, where am I going?
01:22:50.000 Right?
01:22:55.000 So I write some jokes.
01:22:57.000 They put them in the speech.
01:22:59.000 And then Dana goes, Do you mind looking over the speech?
01:23:05.000 Because we want to make sure that the tone of the speech is right.
01:23:10.000 I'm going, this is too much.
01:23:12.000 This is too much responsibility.
01:23:14.000 But I was honored.
01:23:16.000 I read it and I said, I personally don't think that the tone is correct.
01:23:23.000 I think you're kind of talking down to them and they're not going to like it.
01:23:28.000 And he goes, he goes, then rewrite the speech.
01:23:33.000 I'm going, okay.
01:23:36.000 So I just changed.
01:23:37.000 I didn't rewrite the speech.
01:23:39.000 I just changed some tone of kind of putting them on the Equal level as opposed to being talking down to the Soviet leaders, they didn't appreciate that.
01:23:50.000 Can you explain how he was talking down?
01:23:53.000 Just teaching them that capitalism is so much better than what they got and they should switch to that form of politics as opposed to kind of appreciate what they and their, you know, their empire at that time.
01:24:14.000 That is still very big.
01:24:17.000 So I didn't, I just felt that I would be just nicer.
01:24:22.000 And they liked it.
01:24:24.000 They changed some of these things and they kept it that way.
01:24:29.000 And so I don't know how, Mitzi used to tell me, You and Reagan changed the world.
01:24:37.000 I go, Yeah, Mitzi, you're right.
01:24:39.000 I'm just telling jokes.
01:24:41.000 He goes, No, it was his secret weapon that he used to get to Gorbachev. 0.58
01:24:49.000 Well, maybe there's some truth to that.
01:24:52.000 Well, certainly truth in that you kind of understood how they would receive what he was saying.
01:24:58.000 That he was saying something that would, they would become defensive and they would be offended by it.
01:25:03.000 Yeah.
01:25:04.000 Yeah.
01:25:05.000 That was my concern.
01:25:05.000 Yeah.
01:25:08.000 But, you know, I guess.
01:25:09.000 Well, you know that culture way better than anybody else.
01:25:12.000 And that's what he was asking me.
01:25:14.000 I mean, at some point, he goes, How would you deal with Gorbachev?
01:25:19.000 He was literally, it's like, And I'm like, going, am I the most qualified person to answer this question?
01:25:25.000 And he goes, You are, because you lived there 26 years.
01:25:29.000 None of us politicians have.
01:25:31.000 So he was really very receptive to my suggestions, whatever they, you know.
01:25:39.000 Wow.
01:25:40.000 That had to be weird.
01:25:42.000 I mean, you're talking to Ronald Reagan in the 1980s.
01:25:46.000 Yeah.
01:25:48.000 Well, Mr. Gorbachev, tear down that wall.
01:25:52.000 I didn't write that joke.
01:25:53.000 I did not.
01:25:54.000 No, it wasn't a joke.
01:25:55.000 It was a joke, yeah.
01:25:56.000 But crazy that it was a joke.
01:25:58.000 Changed the world.
01:25:59.000 Changed the world.
01:26:00.000 Literally changed the world.
01:26:01.000 Changed my world for sure.
01:26:03.000 Unfortunately, that's what's crazy.
01:26:06.000 What's crazy is that it's like, but that was the problem with the world back then with only a few channels.
01:26:13.000 They could just decide you were done.
01:26:14.000 You were done.
01:26:15.000 Yeah.
01:26:16.000 Yeah.
01:26:16.000 I mean, that happened to a lot of, like, if actors ran afoul of certain people, you got cast out, you got blackballed, and that was it.
01:26:27.000 You never worked again.
01:26:28.000 Yeah.
01:26:29.000 And that happened to a lot of people.
01:26:29.000 Yeah.
01:26:31.000 Well, I'm happy that I found Branson.
01:26:31.000 Yeah.
01:26:36.000 I'm happy that I was able to adjust, you know.
01:26:39.000 And it's just like when you look at the trajectory of my life, I realized that that's one of my strong skills to be able to adjust.
01:26:51.000 Coming, just having the idea that I will be able to do comedy in America was insane for most people.
01:27:01.000 Well, just adjusting from the culture of living in Russia to living in America is insane, too.
01:27:05.000 You made a lot of adjustments.
01:27:07.000 A lot.
01:27:08.000 And when we were, came, Because we're coming through Italy to come to America, and they would, in Italy, they kept us three months to check all the documents and make sure that we're not like the Communist Party or don't have a record.
01:27:27.000 Like a spy.
01:27:28.000 Yeah, right, right, right.
01:27:32.000 And we had to survive.
01:27:33.000 That was another interesting moment of our life because we're going and they didn't want people to leave because that looked bad. 0.67
01:27:43.000 For the Soviet Union. 0.56
01:27:44.000 So they would do all the things, they would only like change you $100 per person, and you're supposed to survive like three months of living in a foreign country.
01:27:59.000 And so, but they would give you a list of things that you could take with you.
01:28:04.000 So, like a photo camera, hat, something you could sell there to live on.
01:28:12.000 And yeah, and of Two suitcases for each person and very strict list of things.
01:28:19.000 What was an interesting kind of loophole, we found out through the grapevine that condoms was a very expensive item in Italy for some reason.
01:28:38.000 In the Soviet Union, you could buy them for a penny, and in Italy, you could sell them for a dollar.
01:28:46.000 And so, my Quest was like when I've learned, and there was no restriction how many you can take with you.
01:28:53.000 So I would go to each pharmacy, whatever I could get, and just I was, you know, we got like half of the suitcase of condoms and we put it in my mother's suitcase.
01:29:08.000 So that way, hopefully, nobody's going to ask her what, why, you know, they would be embarrassed or whatever.
01:29:17.000 So they didn't ask, and we got through.
01:29:21.000 And so, my job and my parents' job was to go on the open market every Saturday and Sunday and try to sell those condoms so we can pay rent and food and whatever else.
01:29:37.000 So, my parents, it was so funny how they transitioned.
01:29:40.000 They were two very conservative people, and they're embarrassed, but then they realize we need money to eat.
01:29:50.000 So they would, mom became pretty smart.
01:29:55.000 She translated from Russian into Italian.
01:30:02.000 If you don't want to have a kid like this, and would point at me and would hold that card and say, then buy a condom.
01:30:13.000 And people would laugh.
01:30:15.000 They would laugh and they would buy two or three.
01:30:20.000 It was just more of a joke.
01:30:21.000 But we were, you know, surviving on that for a long time.
01:30:26.000 Wow.
01:30:27.000 Yeah.
01:30:28.000 Yeah.
01:30:29.000 Wow.
01:30:29.000 Yeah.
01:30:30.000 So it was kind of bang for the buck, kind of a, you know, it was not expected, but we survived.
01:30:39.000 So a lot of those moments in life when you, I look at my life and I go, that was survival.
01:30:47.000 Then coming to America and getting a job and getting to God is that helped you and me to become who we are.
01:30:59.000 That's just, God's hand on that.
01:31:03.000 That's amazing.
01:31:04.000 Yeah, you adapted, man.
01:31:05.000 You adapted multiple times.
01:31:08.000 That's so crazy.
01:31:09.000 God.
01:31:10.000 Yeah.
01:31:11.000 Trying to survive in Italy, you didn't speak Italian.
01:31:14.000 No.
01:31:15.000 Did you guys speak anything other than Russian?
01:31:17.000 No, just Russian.
01:31:17.000 No.
01:31:18.000 But there was immigration.
01:31:20.000 There were other Russian people that you could kind of communicate with.
01:31:25.000 And I would go, even in Italy, I would go to a movie theater.
01:31:32.000 And I was so determined.
01:31:34.000 There was one movie theater in Rome that would, for a dollar, you can sit and watch English speaking movies and you can sit there all day for a dollar.
01:31:47.000 And so I would go, it was like my, I was learning English, listening to it, listening.
01:31:53.000 And then one time I remember a couple, I needed to practice.
01:32:00.000 And there was a couple, I asked them, Speak English and they said yes.
01:32:05.000 And the guy, the girl was from Belgium, the guy was from Washington, D.C., and they said, We'll help you and we'll just come every week, like on Monday or some, whatever it was, and we'll just go to a coffee shop and we'll talk to you so you can practice English.
01:32:25.000 And I remember they asked me, What did you do in Russia?
01:32:33.000 I said, I was a comedian.
01:32:35.000 somehow through dictionary, whatever I could to make that.
01:32:41.000 And they said, What do you want to accomplish when you're in America?
01:32:50.000 And again, I don't know anything about America.
01:32:53.000 And I have this, I asked them, I said, Where is the most successful people, comedians perform?
01:33:03.000 And they said, Las Vegas.
01:33:06.000 And I said, In five years, somehow I delivered, I'll be in Las Vegas.
01:33:14.000 And it's exactly what happened.
01:33:17.000 Five years later, I was at the Tropicana Hotel with Murray Lanston, the unknown comic, doing a show in Las Vegas.
01:33:27.000 I remember that guy with the paper bag over his head.
01:33:29.000 Yeah.
01:33:30.000 From The Gong Show.
01:33:31.000 Yep.
01:33:32.000 Yeah.
01:33:33.000 Which was a great show.
01:33:34.000 It was a great show.
01:33:35.000 Yeah.
01:33:35.000 It was a crazy show.
01:33:35.000 It was kind of an early version of Kill Tony.
01:33:38.000 In a lot of ways.
01:33:39.000 In a lot of ways.
01:33:39.000 Yeah.
01:33:40.000 Because some of the people were just like unbelievably untalented.
01:33:43.000 Yeah.
01:33:44.000 And then you would hit the gong.
01:33:46.000 Exactly.
01:33:47.000 That show was great.
01:33:48.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:33:49.000 Didn't they try to bring that back?
01:33:51.000 Didn't they try to bring the gong show back at one point in time with someone else?
01:33:54.000 I think they did.
01:33:55.000 Who did they bring it back with?
01:33:57.000 Do you remember, Jamie?
01:33:59.000 But do you remember?
01:34:00.000 You don't remember.
01:34:01.000 Off the top of my head, no.
01:34:01.000 I don't, yeah.
01:34:03.000 It was someone that you were like, huh.
01:34:07.000 I wonder why they chose that person.
01:34:10.000 Actually, oh, yeah, 2000.
01:34:12.000 Oh, David Tell.
01:34:13.000 Oh, it was dead.
01:34:14.000 That's right.
01:34:15.000 Who was it?
01:34:16.000 It was David Tell.
01:34:17.000 Oh.
01:34:19.000 That's right.
01:34:20.000 It was 2012?
01:34:21.000 Well, it says briefly in 2008 and then again in 2017, and then I don't think he was involved in that one.
01:34:27.000 Oh.
01:34:28.000 So it's 2008, is that what you said?
01:34:29.000 Yeah.
01:34:31.000 Wow.
01:34:32.000 Yeah, he's perfect for that.
01:34:35.000 The problem is, once a show's been done, you try to redo it.
01:34:38.000 It's like it's always going to be.
01:34:40.000 There's been three different versions of Fear Factor now.
01:34:43.000 You know, it's like now they're doing it with Johnny Knoxville.
01:34:47.000 It's kind of crazy, like the amount of different things that have happened in your life, you know, and then now to find yourself with another revival because of Kill Tony.
01:34:57.000 Yes.
01:34:58.000 Yes.
01:34:59.000 And going back on tour, I have a poster.
01:35:02.000 I don't know if people on the radio can't see it, but I have a poster of my tour.
01:35:07.000 Well, we'll send it to the website so you can look it up.
01:35:12.000 So I am excited.
01:35:13.000 And where are you going to comedy clubs?
01:35:15.000 Yeah.
01:35:15.000 All over the place?
01:35:16.000 Yeah.
01:35:16.000 Atlanta is the next one.
01:35:19.000 No one can read that.
01:35:19.000 Oh, okay.
01:35:20.000 Yeah, put that down.
01:35:21.000 Go to the website.
01:35:22.000 Jamie will pull up the website.
01:35:24.000 Yeah.
01:35:25.000 And it's on yakov.com.
01:35:25.000 You brought a song.
01:35:27.000 Yakov brought a song.
01:35:29.000 That's hilarious, man.
01:35:30.000 So what was the Kill Tony experience like?
01:35:32.000 It was great.
01:35:33.000 I mean, I am obviously my show is kind of G rated, and so Kill Tony is not.
01:35:45.000 And so, but yet it was.
01:35:49.000 It doesn't matter.
01:35:49.000 It doesn't matter.
01:35:50.000 It doesn't matter.
01:35:51.000 He was so respectful of this, Tony, and set me up.
01:35:58.000 You know, I mean, I felt like my head was this big, and.
01:36:03.000 He was seeing me as a super legend, and I am very grateful.
01:36:08.000 It's hard for me sometimes to accept that people see me because I've been doing this for 60 years.
01:36:17.000 60 years comedy.
01:36:18.000 That's crazy.
01:36:19.000 Yeah.
01:36:20.000 Well, I remember the first time we met.
01:36:21.000 We met at the comedy store.
01:36:24.000 I want to say, was that like 15 years ago or something like that?
01:36:27.000 Probably.
01:36:27.000 He dropped in, and I'd never seen him, and I was like, oh, what is he doing in town?
01:36:32.000 Yeah.
01:36:33.000 Decided you wanted to come by the store and see what was going on with the young guys and do some stand up.
01:36:37.000 We hung out for a little bit in the green room.
01:36:40.000 I'm like, and I remember telling everybody, Yakov Smirno is really funny, man. 0.96
01:36:43.000 He's fucking cool. 0.79
01:36:44.000 Thank you. 0.95
01:36:45.000 Thank you.
01:36:45.000 It was fun.
01:36:46.000 It was fun to hang out with you. 1.00
01:36:48.000 It was fun to see you hanging out with all these weirdo, young, pot smoking fucking animals. 1.00
01:36:55.000 Coming from Branson, right? 1.00
01:36:57.000 Yeah.
01:36:57.000 You were coming from Branson.
01:36:58.000 You're hanging out with Joey Diaz.
01:37:00.000 We were laughing, though.
01:37:02.000 We had a good time, man.
01:37:04.000 It was a really good time.
01:37:05.000 It was fun.
01:37:06.000 It's fun.
01:37:07.000 And I go back to The clubs, and I my goal was really to last year I would go to small clubs and develop an hour of material that is totally current.
01:37:21.000 I talk about relationships, I talk about having a one year old in my life.
01:37:27.000 I talk, and it's an interesting thing.
01:37:29.000 I was doing it at your club, and it's great to watch the reaction of the audience.
01:37:41.000 They have a lot of respect, but they're also laughing and they're seeing it's fun because I talk about relationships.
01:37:48.000 So they might come in disconnected, but then all of a sudden you see how they put their hands next to each other.
01:37:57.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:37:58.000 But I like it.
01:38:00.000 You're a uniter.
01:38:01.000 You're bringing couples closer together with your comedy.
01:38:05.000 That's really my goal.
01:38:06.000 I like that you like that.
01:38:09.000 I enjoy seeing families.
01:38:11.000 Like Nate Borghese is really the one who kind of got me out of Branson because he.
01:38:19.000 Shown that there is a need for that humor.
01:38:25.000 And families come.
01:38:25.000 Yes.
01:38:27.000 And when you go to his show, it's like looking around.
01:38:29.000 Yep.
01:38:30.000 Grandma and grandchildren and parents.
01:38:34.000 But everyone's laughing.
01:38:35.000 The thing about Nate that's so unique is Nate is hilarious to me.
01:38:39.000 Yes.
01:38:39.000 Nate is hilarious to a 20 year old kid in college.
01:38:43.000 Nate is hilarious to their grandmother.
01:38:46.000 Right.
01:38:46.000 Nate is hilarious to your children.
01:38:47.000 You could bring your 10 year old kids.
01:38:49.000 To see Nate.
01:38:50.000 Nate is a genius, and that is who he is all the time.
01:38:54.000 He's like a really funny, very smart guy who's got a perfect style.
01:39:02.000 Didn't he make the most money ever or something like that last year doing stand ups?
01:39:07.000 He sold the most tickets ever?
01:39:08.000 He made a million dollars.
01:39:09.000 It was something crazy, but it's like he's doing this, selling out stadiums two times in a night.
01:39:15.000 Exactly.
01:39:16.000 Yeah, and he does 3 p.m. shows.
01:39:18.000 It's nuts.
01:39:19.000 It's incredible.
01:39:20.000 But it shows that there is a need for that.
01:39:23.000 Well, it shows that it doesn't matter.
01:39:25.000 It's just funny.
01:39:26.000 Like, Brian Regan's another great example.
01:39:29.000 Brian Regan, squeaky clean, unfucking believably funny, so talented, so funny.
01:39:35.000 And it's just funny.
01:39:37.000 It doesn't have to be clean or dirty.
01:39:40.000 And we have that at the club, too.
01:39:41.000 I mean, this is like the club gets labeled as some kind of extreme anti woke thing.
01:39:46.000 It's nonsense.
01:39:48.000 I played, I performed there at your club a couple of weeks ago.
01:39:53.000 They totally loved it.
01:39:54.000 Nobody expected anything and they just enjoyed it.
01:39:57.000 They laughed all the way through.
01:39:59.000 I love doing that.
01:40:00.000 So to me, I see young people who don't know me and they're totally relating and I'm relating to them, which is great.
01:40:09.000 That's what I want to do.
01:40:10.000 We're human beings telling jokes.
01:40:11.000 That's it.
01:40:12.000 That's all it is. 0.94
01:40:13.000 And if comedy done correctly is done from your perspective, whether your perspective is Nate Borghazi or your perspective is fucking, you know, fill in the blank, David Tell, whoever it is. 0.93
01:40:23.000 Right. 0.66
01:40:24.000 Joey Diaz, Brian Holtzman, like whatever it is, it doesn't matter.
01:40:27.000 It's like, what's funny is funny.
01:40:29.000 And it might not be your thing.
01:40:30.000 Like, that's the thing, too.
01:40:32.000 One of the problems with comedy is that there's only one, there's like one label.
01:40:36.000 And you might go see, like, Brian Holtzman is like death metal comedy.
01:40:40.000 Or you might see Nate Borgatzi, who's like, you know, I don't know what's the equivalent.
01:40:46.000 Well, Leanne Morgan is another one that was kind of out of nowhere, became very successful because she has that.
01:40:56.000 Clean southern humor, and the Netflix embraced her, and all of a sudden, she is touring and doing concerts.
01:41:08.000 Yeah, all you have to do is be funny.
01:41:10.000 It's like funny from whatever perspective you're coming from.
01:41:13.000 And again, it's not going to be for everybody.
01:41:15.000 That's just how it is.
01:41:16.000 There's a lot of people that aren't going to like A or B.
01:41:16.000 Right.
01:41:19.000 It doesn't matter.
01:41:20.000 It doesn't matter.
01:41:21.000 It's just, but the thing about comedy is like when you go to a comedy club, you don't know what you're going to get.
01:41:26.000 You might get Run DMC or you might get ACDC.
01:41:28.000 You have no idea.
01:41:30.000 Right.
01:41:30.000 It's all just comedy.
01:41:32.000 But I think that's one of the cool things about it.
01:41:34.000 Right.
01:41:36.000 And I totally agree with you.
01:41:37.000 And I want to be able to do that one hour straight comedy.
01:41:44.000 No, there was an interesting thing that happened about a year ago or so.
01:41:53.000 I, a young comedian, he said, you know, I was writing some jokes and he was helping me.
01:42:04.000 And he said, Yakov, you know that you're not a stand up comedian, you're a one man show.
01:42:13.000 And I go, at first, I was like, kind of, what were you talking about?
01:42:18.000 And because I tell in Branson, it's like more storytelling and not just punchline, punchline, punchline.
01:42:28.000 And he was correct.
01:42:30.000 So I, at first, I got kind of like, what do you mean?
01:42:34.000 Who are you to tell me I'm not a stand up comedian?
01:42:38.000 And then I go, Chad GPT, is Yaakov a stand up comedian or is he a one man show?
01:42:47.000 And Chad GPT said, Yakov Smirnov used to be a stand up comedian, and now he's a one man show.
01:42:56.000 And now, coming from Chad GPT, I'm going, dang, that's now official.
01:43:03.000 Wait a minute.
01:43:04.000 So, it took me a whole year to rewrite everything that I needed to rewrite to say it's punchline, punchline, it's just straight comedy.
01:43:16.000 So, I became a stand up comedian again.
01:43:18.000 Well, there's nothing wrong with one man show stand up comedy.
01:43:21.000 Either because some people do their comedy like a one man show, and some of the best comics, like Colin Quinn, Colin Quinn does a series of one man shows.
01:43:30.000 But if you ask Chat GPT who is Colin Quinn, he'll say he's a stand up comedian, right?
01:43:36.000 But Chat GPT got me wrong, whatever it was, it doesn't matter, it's not even a person, right?
01:43:43.000 But but it's actually helped me to uh tune in uh my comedy, and because I was maybe a little bit.
01:43:54.000 More relaxed being in my own theater with all people coming to see me.
01:44:01.000 So it's not like you're in a club when you're like with other comedians when you have to be really, really sharp.
01:44:08.000 And that's what I think it did for me.
01:44:10.000 So I spent a year doing that.
01:44:13.000 Now I have that hour and I'm ready to go.
01:44:17.000 And that's why I went on the tour.
01:44:19.000 That's awesome.
01:44:20.000 Yeah.
01:44:21.000 I love when comics are still interested in it.
01:44:24.000 And still writing and still love it after all these years.
01:44:27.000 Absolutely.
01:44:28.000 You know who I draw some inspiration from as well?
01:44:30.000 Is Argus Hamilton.
01:44:31.000 Yeah.
01:44:32.000 Argus is still killing it.
01:44:34.000 Yes. 0.81
01:44:35.000 Still killing it in LA.
01:44:36.000 Keeps going. 0.99
01:44:37.000 And every time there's something new in the news, he's always got a great fucking line about it. 0.98
01:44:41.000 He's a funny dude. 0.98
01:44:42.000 He is.
01:44:43.000 And he's still getting after it.
01:44:44.000 He still loves it.
01:44:46.000 And, you know, Argus used to famously be into the substances.
01:44:49.000 And now all he does is run.
01:44:52.000 And I remember one time we were at the comic store and we were in the parking lot and it was. 0.99
01:44:57.000 After the show, and Argus showed up with fucking running shoes on and just ran in. 0.97
01:45:00.000 I'm like, What are you doing, man? 0.99
01:45:02.000 And he's like, I have to run every day.
01:45:05.000 And do a set because to him, that's his motivation.
01:45:08.000 Yeah.
01:45:08.000 He does like, I think he runs like 10 miles a day.
01:45:11.000 He's in his 70s.
01:45:11.000 Yeah.
01:45:12.000 And interesting that, you know, when I was so naive because Argus was very friendly with Mitzi.
01:45:22.000 And I would go to their house and I would see Argus there.
01:45:27.000 In the morning, and I was like, Why is, you know, and I couldn't connect those two things.
01:45:34.000 I mean, I could not.
01:45:36.000 I mean, honestly, it was, I'll tell you how naive I was.
01:45:42.000 So Mitzi gives me that work, right?
01:45:45.000 And I live in that house.
01:45:47.000 And Andrew Dice Clay moves into that house, right?
01:45:51.000 And Andrew teaches me English, okay?
01:45:54.000 Can you imagine that? 1.00
01:45:56.000 Rub a dub dub. 1.00
01:45:59.000 So, but that was a party house. 0.98
01:46:02.000 I mean, this was a house where.
01:46:05.000 Was Kennison living there then?
01:46:06.000 Kennison would just hang out there all the time.
01:46:12.000 They would scream at each other, Andrew and Kennison.
01:46:18.000 And that was just kind of a joke between those two.
01:46:20.000 And they go, ah, ah.
01:46:22.000 And I would have to go to bed because I got to get up early in the morning to go work.
01:46:28.000 And those guys are screaming at each other just for fun.
01:46:33.000 And I go downstairs and I go, hey, guys, you're friends, stop.
01:46:37.000 So we're playing this joke and they're, yeah, screaming.
01:46:43.000 And I go, you know what?
01:46:44.000 Why don't you?
01:46:45.000 You're close to the comedy store. 0.55
01:46:47.000 Why don't you go downstairs and scream there?
01:46:52.000 And they look at each other and go, okay, let's go.
01:46:56.000 So it's midnight, and we're all going, whoever lived there, going to the comedy store.
01:47:03.000 And Sam gets on stage and starts screaming.
01:47:07.000 This is the first time that he ever got on stage, and he went to the.
01:47:13.000 And very few people in the audience.
01:47:16.000 And he went into their face.
01:47:18.000 Ah, you.
01:47:19.000 No way.
01:47:20.000 That's where it came from?
01:47:20.000 Yeah.
01:47:22.000 That's where it came from.
01:47:23.000 And then after that, it just became like his thing, and the rest is history.
01:47:30.000 That's crazy.
01:47:31.000 Yeah.
01:47:34.000 That was happening there.
01:47:35.000 A lot of stuff was happening there.
01:47:37.000 They would come and do drugs, you know, like Robin and Richard Pryor, they would do.
01:47:45.000 And I. Tells you this is silly, but I would wake up in the morning and I would see a mirror on the table, right?
01:47:56.000 Okay, so bear with me.
01:47:58.000 So, and there's like white powder on the table.
01:48:02.000 So you clean it up.
01:48:03.000 I was thinking they're eating donuts off the mirror.
01:48:08.000 So I would clean whatever it was, hang it up, and next morning I go, Argus, why don't you guys use plates?
01:48:17.000 You have a dishwasher.
01:48:19.000 And they would laugh at me and they wouldn't tell me what's going on.
01:48:23.000 But weren't they mad that you threw away their coke?
01:48:25.000 No, no, there was not much.
01:48:26.000 I mean, it was just, yeah, whatever residue.
01:48:28.000 I had no idea.
01:48:29.000 I wasn't testing.
01:48:31.000 That's how much coke they had, that they left some of it on the mirror.
01:48:34.000 Yeah.
01:48:34.000 Isn't that crazy?
01:48:35.000 That's crazy.
01:48:37.000 It was, but I didn't know.
01:48:39.000 So I kind of lived in that wholesome kind of a world.
01:48:45.000 So you were there while Kinnison was developing.
01:48:49.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:48:51.000 Did he arrive at the store around the same time that you did?
01:48:55.000 A little bit later.
01:48:56.000 Yeah, a little later.
01:48:56.000 A little later?
01:48:57.000 Well, like what year did he arrive?
01:48:59.000 Probably 79, I would say.
01:49:03.000 And he really did around like, what, 85, 86?
01:49:07.000 Yes, yes.
01:49:08.000 I think in 85 he did Letterman.
01:49:11.000 Yes, yes.
01:49:12.000 And then in 86 he had that HBO special that blew him up.
01:49:16.000 Probably.
01:49:17.000 Yeah.
01:49:17.000 Probably.
01:49:19.000 No, I found out about Kinnison.
01:49:20.000 It's a funny story.
01:49:21.000 I've told it before.
01:49:22.000 I apologize if the audience has heard it.
01:49:24.000 I was working at a health club at a gym called the Boston Athletic Club in South Boston.
01:49:31.000 And I was a trainer.
01:49:32.000 I'll teach people how to lift weights.
01:49:34.000 And there was this girl who was a volleyball player.
01:49:36.000 She was hilarious.
01:49:37.000 She was this big girl, big athletic girl.
01:49:39.000 She was very funny.
01:49:40.000 She was just like boisterous, like a really loud, funny lady.
01:49:44.000 And she was like my age.
01:49:46.000 And she told me about Kinnison.
01:49:49.000 And then she told me about his bit.
01:49:50.000 She's like, oh my God, I saw this guy on HBO.
01:49:52.000 She had a heavy Boston accent. 0.92
01:49:54.000 This guy on HBO, he was so fucking hilarious. 0.99
01:49:57.000 And he did this bit about people having sex with corpses. 0.98
01:50:02.000 So she does this bit. 0.69
01:50:04.000 She laid down in the parking lot of the Boston Athletic Club and did that bit.
01:50:09.000 So Kinnison had a very famous bit about. 0.88
01:50:12.000 Homosexual necrophiliacs who are paying money to spend moments alone with the freshest male corpses.
01:50:20.000 So she is lying down on the parking lot, on the ground in the parking lot. 0.98
01:50:25.000 And she's like, Oh, I'm going to lie down.
01:50:28.000 She did the whole thing.
01:50:29.000 I'm going to be with Jesus, and now I'm dead.
01:50:31.000 Oh, what is this? 1.00
01:50:33.000 Feels like someone's fucking me in the ass. 1.00
01:50:35.000 You mean life keeps fucking you in the ass even after you're dead? 1.00
01:50:38.000 It never ends. 1.00
01:50:39.000 So she was doing his bit, and I was laughing at her.
01:50:43.000 Doing his bit.
01:50:43.000 I'm like, I got to see this guy.
01:50:45.000 This is crazy.
01:50:46.000 So that was my introduction to Sam Kinnison.
01:50:49.000 My friend lying on her stomach doing an impression.
01:50:53.000 I'll never forget that, man, because I was 19 years old.
01:50:56.000 I remember that.
01:50:57.000 And I remember thinking, so it was 86.
01:50:58.000 So I remember thinking, this is crazy.
01:51:02.000 Unbelievable.
01:51:04.000 I had no desire to do comedy back then.
01:51:06.000 I wasn't even thinking about it, it wasn't even on my radar.
01:51:09.000 It was never even a thought.
01:51:10.000 I loved comedy, I loved watching it, but I never thought about comedy.
01:51:13.000 So what made you, what was the transition when you started?
01:51:17.000 Well, I was heavily invested in martial arts.
01:51:22.000 That's all I wanted to do.
01:51:23.000 All I wanted to do was my goal was to compete, and that's all I was doing.
01:51:28.000 That's the reason why I got the job at the gym so that I could have a place that I could work out and also I could make money there.
01:51:35.000 And my friends that I used to train with, they're the ones who told me to do comedy.
01:51:40.000 But I was like, listen, you laugh at me because you're also psychos. 0.99
01:51:45.000 Like, the things I'm saying are fucking crazy. 0.99
01:51:48.000 We're all fighters. 0.99
01:51:48.000 Like, you're. 0.99
01:51:49.000 We're all traveling around the country fighting.
01:51:52.000 Like, this is not a normal activity.
01:51:54.000 This is not normal humor.
01:51:56.000 But my good friend Steve Graham, who I'm still friends with to this day, he's the one who talked me into doing it. 0.82
01:52:01.000 And then I went to an open mic night and I realized, oh, everybody sucks in the beginning.
01:52:05.000 Like, it's just like martial arts. 0.99
01:52:06.000 You start off and you suck and then you get better at it.
01:52:09.000 But my introduction to comedy was that lady, really, my introduction to Kennison, rather.
01:52:14.000 The idea, because when I saw Kennison, I was like, oh, comedy is a lot of different things.
01:52:19.000 It's different, there's a lot of different forms to it.
01:52:22.000 Because I always saw guys like Jerry Seinfeld who were very funny and they'd tell these jokes, but I never thought that was me.
01:52:22.000 Yeah.
01:52:28.000 I couldn't do that.
01:52:29.000 But I saw Kennison, I was like, oh, this is a bunch of different kinds of comedy.
01:52:33.000 Right, right.
01:52:34.000 This is very interesting.
01:52:35.000 And then when I started out in 88, boy, the guys in Boston used to talk about the comedy store like it was mecca.
01:52:44.000 Like you had to go there, you had to go to the store.
01:52:47.000 The store was where Richard Pryor started and Sam Kennison and all these comics and David Letterman, the All Me.
01:52:54.000 They all came out of the store.
01:52:55.000 Bill Hicks, he was a doorman at the store.
01:52:58.000 Yes.
01:52:58.000 And everybody talked about the store.
01:53:00.000 It was one of those things where it was like, you know, you had to go there.
01:53:04.000 And then when I first maybe got on a television show, I flew out to L.A. to do a pilot.
01:53:10.000 And that was the first time I ever went to the store.
01:53:12.000 And I remember being so weirded out, just being in the building, like, wow, I can't believe I'm at the comedy store.
01:53:20.000 When did you meet Mitzi?
01:53:22.000 I met Mitzi in 94.
01:53:24.000 So I did the pilot.
01:53:26.000 The pilot wound up getting picked up.
01:53:28.000 Then I came out and I was on a TV show that it only lasted like six episodes.
01:53:32.000 It was called Hardball.
01:53:34.000 It was a sitcom about a baseball team.
01:53:37.000 And I played the star player. 0.99
01:53:38.000 I played this crazy dude who was always crashing his Lamborghini and that kind of shit, you know? 0.98
01:53:44.000 And so I would spend my nights every night at the store. 0.95
01:53:49.000 I didn't have any friends and I didn't know anybody there, so I just would go to the set.
01:53:53.000 And then after the set, I'd go hang out at the store.
01:53:55.000 And then I eventually, Mitzi showcased me.
01:53:59.000 I became a non paid regular, so I got to go on after the comedians performed.
01:54:04.000 So the way it worked at the comedy store.
01:54:07.000 They'd have a show that was scheduled from like 8 p.m. to like 1 a.m. or close to it.
01:54:12.000 And then after it was probably like really midnight, but it always was like 1 a.m. by the time you got up.
01:54:18.000 And then I would go on after everybody else.
01:54:20.000 And I did that for a few months.
01:54:22.000 And then she passed me.
01:54:23.000 And I remember thinking, like, when she passed me, like, I was like, oh no, I think I can be a comedian now.
01:54:30.000 Like, this is, I actually can make a living doing this.
01:54:32.000 Because before then, I wasn't sure.
01:54:34.000 Right.
01:54:35.000 Even though I was getting paid and I would do comedy, I'd get paid to do comedy.
01:54:38.000 It was still like very.
01:54:40.000 I'd bomb a lot.
01:54:41.000 It was like, it wasn't.
01:54:42.000 Right.
01:54:43.000 Also, it was like in the middle of the sitcom, so I was working all day.
01:54:47.000 I didn't want to do that anymore.
01:54:50.000 I liked it because it paid a lot of money, but it wasn't really my thing.
01:54:53.000 I wasn't into acting that much.
01:54:55.000 It was, to me, it was like comedy was more exciting.
01:54:59.000 It was live, live audiences.
01:55:01.000 The sitcom thing was fun because you got to use like your skills in telling jokes as a comedian, but it wasn't the same thing.
01:55:09.000 And then I got news radio, which was a much more.
01:55:13.000 Much better show, and then I was like, Well, this is different.
01:55:16.000 This is there's other levels to this, and that's how I met Hartman and all those other people.
01:55:21.000 But it was to me the most important thing was getting passed at the store.
01:55:23.000 I was like, Wow, that was more important to me than getting a sitcom or anything.
01:55:28.000 I was like, I can't believe it. 0.99
01:55:29.000 I got passed, my name's on the wall of the fucking comedy store. 0.98
01:55:33.000 Wow, it was so exciting in lights, too. 0.99
01:55:36.000 Now, right?
01:55:37.000 Do you have it?
01:55:38.000 Is it in neon inside?
01:55:40.000 Yeah, I'm on the wall inside.
01:55:42.000 Yeah, she's like, This lady, Mitzi Shore, like.
01:55:45.000 People don't understand.
01:55:46.000 She was the most important figure outside of all the comedians, the most important figure in comedy.
01:55:52.000 By far, there was no one like her.
01:55:55.000 She was a mentor.
01:55:58.000 She was a curator of a mental health asylum.
01:56:05.000 And she would joke around about it.
01:56:06.000 She was like, the inmates are running the asylum.
01:56:10.000 And that was originally when we came to Texas.
01:56:14.000 I was going to call it the asylum.
01:56:16.000 Really?
01:56:16.000 Yeah, because I thought.
01:56:18.000 As a nod, mother, she was a nod to Mitzi, yeah, yeah, it turned out much further.
01:56:22.000 But as a nod to Mitzi, the idea was that, like, because she was always saying the inmates are running the asylum, she would say that all the time while we were there, like, she encouraged it, she liked when comedians were out of their minds, she loved it, she loved that environment.
01:56:37.000 And so, as a nod to her, we were going to call it the asylum.
01:56:41.000 But then I was like, one of the things that someone said, because you know, Ron White was the first guy to move here, he was really like.
01:56:49.000 Patient Zero in the Austin comedy experience and the new version of the Austin comedy experience.
01:56:54.000 And he was like, It's the center of the country.
01:56:57.000 I love it because I can fly to New York.
01:56:58.000 I go to Florida.
01:57:00.000 I go everywhere.
01:57:00.000 It's in the middle.
01:57:02.000 You know, it's like the flights aren't as long.
01:57:04.000 People are nice.
01:57:05.000 I love it here.
01:57:06.000 And I was like, Oh, well, it's like the mothership.
01:57:09.000 And then all the other places like launch out.
01:57:12.000 Yeah.
01:57:13.000 And also, I'm obsessed with UFOs.
01:57:16.000 Obviously.
01:57:16.000 I can see.
01:57:17.000 Obviously.
01:57:17.000 Yeah.
01:57:18.000 I have a bit of a UFO problem.
01:57:20.000 Yeah.
01:57:21.000 So that's why we called it the mothership.
01:57:22.000 But I mean, the bar's named Mitzi's.
01:57:24.000 Yes, yes.
01:57:25.000 And it was, you know, losing her that early, I still think she went too early, you know.
01:57:33.000 Well, for me, it was like she suffered for so long.
01:57:36.000 It was really hard to see her.
01:57:39.000 She had a neurological condition later in her life.
01:57:42.000 It was very hard to see her.
01:57:43.000 She would come around a store.
01:57:46.000 But she nurtured so many comedians and helped us all.
01:57:51.000 And not always.
01:57:52.000 Sometimes she had terrible advice.
01:57:55.000 She would change your whole act, make you have a fake name.
01:57:59.000 She tried to turn Joey Diaz into Fat Baby.
01:58:01.000 That was his nickname or his name.
01:58:01.000 Is that right?
01:58:04.000 So on the lineup, instead of Joey Diaz, it would say Fat Baby.
01:58:08.000 Ah.
01:58:10.000 She did that for like a couple years.
01:58:12.000 Wow.
01:58:13.000 Yeah.
01:58:14.000 It was nuts.
01:58:15.000 Yeah, you can find some of the old lineups.
01:58:17.000 Jamie's found them before online.
01:58:19.000 It'll still like a lineup from like 2001 or something like that.
01:58:22.000 It says Fat Baby.
01:58:24.000 That's what she was calling them.
01:58:26.000 Yeah.
01:58:27.000 She was a special person.
01:58:29.000 Such a special person.
01:58:30.000 And just that lady loved having that place.
01:58:35.000 She knew that there was something going on there, and there had been something going on there that was very unique in the world of comedy.
01:58:42.000 And it was necessary, you know, to have a place like that where the comics all felt at home.
01:58:48.000 Like we would perform in other places.
01:58:48.000 Yeah.
01:58:50.000 Like we would do sets at the improv.
01:58:52.000 We would do sets at the.
01:58:54.000 I remember one time I did New Year's at the improv.
01:58:58.000 And I came back to the club and Harris Pete says, I love it.
01:59:00.000 You go over there, you do your shows, but you come back home.
01:59:04.000 I was like, yeah, we're all. 0.99
01:59:05.000 This is our weird fucking home. 0.99
01:59:05.000 This is our home. 0.99
01:59:08.000 You know, the home for lost children.
01:59:08.000 Yeah.
01:59:12.000 Like Mitzi would call it the.
01:59:13.000 Home for the island of broken toys.
01:59:16.000 Yeah.
01:59:16.000 Just a bunch of weirdos, you know, but all like feeding off of each other.
01:59:22.000 But to be able to see somebody who is barely speaks English and does five minutes and spot him somehow.
01:59:35.000 Well, she loves developing comics.
01:59:37.000 She loved developing comics.
01:59:37.000 Yes.
01:59:39.000 She loved finding a comic and getting them, which is one of the problems.
01:59:44.000 Like, she didn't.
01:59:45.000 It's really interesting.
01:59:46.000 Like, Jerry Seinfeld went.
01:59:47.000 And she didn't pass him because he was already developed.
01:59:50.000 Right.
01:59:51.000 Yeah.
01:59:51.000 Isn't that crazy?
01:59:52.000 Like, she didn't like that.
01:59:53.000 She was already, he's done.
01:59:55.000 He's done.
01:59:56.000 She liked taking people when they were really raw.
01:59:58.000 That's true.
01:59:59.000 And shaping them.
02:00:00.000 Roseanne was her big project, sure.
02:00:03.000 Yeah.
02:00:04.000 She came to a lot of big projects.
02:00:05.000 Denver, yeah.
02:00:07.000 And so is Jim Carrey and many, many others.
02:00:13.000 She also had, like, very specific, like, techniques she would use to test you.
02:00:17.000 Like, she would always take comics and put them on, like, especially.
02:00:20.000 The young new ones after all the really good comics, like she did with you.
02:00:25.000 When you're talking about like doing that set, Richard Pryor going up and Robin Williams, and that's what she would do.
02:00:31.000 She would take young comics that she thought had potential and she would shove them after the biggest names, people that were killing.
02:00:37.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:00:39.000 She was such a unique person and such an important person in comedy.
02:00:44.000 And Peter, that was a big moment of my life.
02:00:49.000 I went to her funeral and he.
02:00:51.000 Peter, her son, asked me to be one of the polar bears in her funeral.
02:00:57.000 And I felt like full circle, you know.
02:01:01.000 She gave me my life, you know, in a totally different way.
02:01:06.000 If I didn't meet her, God knows what I would be doing.
02:01:10.000 No, I mean, she helped all of us.
02:01:13.000 And I think it's one of the reasons why we talk about her so much.
02:01:16.000 And it's the reason why we named the bar after her.
02:01:19.000 Yeah.
02:01:19.000 Just to, in the spirit of what she was trying to do at the store, we try to do at the mothership.
02:01:24.000 So all the weirdos, welcome weirdos. 0.92
02:01:26.000 Welcome, Weirdos.
02:01:28.000 I'm in.
02:01:28.000 Let's have fun.
02:01:29.000 I'm in.
02:01:30.000 Let's go.
02:01:31.000 How many times have you performed at the club now?
02:01:34.000 Just two very few sets.
02:01:35.000 Twice.
02:01:35.000 Twice.
02:01:36.000 Yeah, yeah.
02:01:38.000 It feels like the original room, the little room, the little boy's room.
02:01:44.000 Well, you know what I say?
02:01:45.000 It's like the little room is like if the original room and the belly room had a baby.
02:01:51.000 And then the big room is like the original room and the main room had a baby.
02:01:56.000 Right, right.
02:01:57.000 It's very close.
02:01:59.000 It's true, but you've done a great job.
02:02:02.000 It feels like home when you walk in there.
02:02:04.000 Well, I basically copied everything that I learned from her and added.
02:02:08.000 More stuff that the comedians requested.
02:02:12.000 And it's interesting that I was helping to build that belly room and then Kill Tony started in the belly room. 0.99
02:02:21.000 You might have been the last person to work on that belly room too because that fucking room scares the shit out of me. 0.99
02:02:21.000 Yeah. 0.99
02:02:26.000 I've been in the bottom, like in the bar area, ordering a drink and like Roast Bat will be on stage and you see the ceiling move. 0.99
02:02:36.000 You're like, Jesus, Yakov, get back up there with a fucking hammer and. 0.99
02:02:42.000 Add some support. 1.00
02:02:45.000 I'm not taking the responsibility.
02:02:47.000 I was just doing booths and.
02:02:49.000 Oh, okay.
02:02:51.000 You didn't do a structure.
02:02:52.000 Okay, that's good.
02:02:53.000 Somebody was.
02:02:54.000 Yeah.
02:02:55.000 I just think sometimes, like, there is no code.
02:02:57.000 There is no code.
02:02:57.000 Roast Battle.
02:02:58.000 When you have Roast Battle up there, like, they would get so wild and rowdy and it would be packed.
02:03:05.000 It would be packed.
02:03:06.000 And it's only supposed to seat, like, what, 70 people or 80 people?
02:03:09.000 Right.
02:03:10.000 It would be a lot more than that.
02:03:13.000 Yeah. 0.99
02:03:14.000 The fucking ceiling would move a little when you were in the bar. 0.99
02:03:17.000 You're like, bro, I hope this doesn't cave in. 1.00
02:03:19.000 That would suck.
02:03:20.000 Yeah. 0.95
02:03:21.000 Yeah.
02:03:21.000 Yeah.
02:03:21.000 Yeah.
02:03:22.000 A place is a magic place.
02:03:23.000 And it's also a magic place because it was like a magnet for crazy people.
02:03:29.000 You'd have the weirdest, nuttiest people that would just come there.
02:03:32.000 Like that one guy.
02:03:33.000 There's one guy that we used to come there.
02:03:34.000 He was a really nice guy. 0.96
02:03:36.000 And he would always dress as Jesus.
02:03:38.000 Yes.
02:03:38.000 I remember that.
02:03:39.000 Yeah.
02:03:39.000 Do you remember his name, Jamie?
02:03:41.000 Heavenly Light.
02:03:42.000 That's right.
02:03:43.000 And he wound up dying, and everybody was so sad.
02:03:47.000 They're really sad because this guy was, it seems like a gimmick, but we got used to it and he was really nice.
02:03:55.000 And he was just like this nice guy that dressed like Jesus all the time.
02:03:58.000 There he is. 0.93
02:04:00.000 But it was part of the fucking cool, crazy weirdness of the comedy store is that we had a guy that dressed as Jesus that was there all the time. 0.97
02:04:11.000 Yeah. 0.94
02:04:12.000 You know, and like, I don't know if he ever did stand up.
02:04:16.000 Did he ever do stand up?
02:04:17.000 I never saw him on stage, but he would be in the room sometimes, and he definitely had timing to give a joke.
02:04:26.000 But I don't remember ever seeing him with a mic in his hand.
02:04:28.000 Isn't that crazy, though?
02:04:29.000 He was just always there hanging out, and he was like, but that was the part of how nutty that place was.
02:04:38.000 The place was just strange.
02:04:41.000 We ran into so many completely schizophrenic people in the parking lot.
02:04:45.000 They would just wander their way back there and start talking to us.
02:04:48.000 Yeah.
02:04:49.000 Explain to us about the voices there.
02:04:51.000 He's on Brody's show with Zach.
02:04:53.000 Oh, wow.
02:04:55.000 Wow.
02:04:57.000 Yeah.
02:04:57.000 I mean, Brody had him on his show.
02:04:58.000 It was just, that's how weird that place was. 0.94
02:05:02.000 It was just such a fucking, just an unusual spot. 0.97
02:05:07.000 Yeah. 0.95
02:05:07.000 And so we've done our best to make our own version of that here. 0.95
02:05:12.000 And that Crest Hill house was also a crazy place, you know.
02:05:19.000 Yeah, I'm not doing that.
02:05:20.000 I think that was a terrible idea.
02:05:21.000 I'm not going to buy a house and have a bunch of comedians living in it. 0.99
02:05:25.000 That sounds like a recipe for fucking disaster. 0.98
02:05:27.000 I just can't manage all that. 0.99
02:05:29.000 You know, I almost bought Crest Hill at one point in time.
02:05:33.000 Yeah, they were selling it, and I was really thinking about buying it.
02:05:33.000 Really?
02:05:36.000 But I had a dog at the time.
02:05:38.000 His name was Frank Sinatra, and Frank Sinatra was an escape artist.
02:05:42.000 That was not a big enough.
02:05:46.000 I'm a firm believer that if you have a dog, you really have to have a big yard.
02:05:49.000 I think otherwise it's cruel.
02:05:51.000 I think the dogs need exercise, they need something.
02:05:56.000 If you don't have a big yard, you've got to be able to take that dog out every day and exercise them and bring them around.
02:06:02.000 Otherwise, it's rude.
02:06:04.000 And Crest Hill had that little tiny backyard, remember?
02:06:06.000 And it was on the hill.
02:06:07.000 I'm like, he's getting over this fence.
02:06:09.000 He was a pit bull.
02:06:09.000 I'm like, he's getting over that fence like that.
02:06:11.000 That dog could get out of anything.
02:06:13.000 I was like, that poor guy.
02:06:14.000 I'm not doing that to him.
02:06:16.000 So I never bought it because of my dog.
02:06:18.000 Like, literally, I was thinking about buying that house and she was selling it.
02:06:23.000 But I went to look at it.
02:06:24.000 I went to look at it to see if I could buy it.
02:06:26.000 I think some comics might have been even living there at the time.
02:06:30.000 So this was like.
02:06:31.000 They sold it several times since then.
02:06:34.000 I was just there not too long ago and it's all.
02:06:39.000 Kind of destroyed because the guy is kind of wacky and he's remodeling it.
02:06:44.000 But it was a big part of my life as I was living there in the little room.
02:06:52.000 Andrew dies clay downstairs and he's teaching me how to date women.
02:07:00.000 I know, I know.
02:07:02.000 It's crazy, but I was so naive.
02:07:04.000 And he was clean at that time.
02:07:07.000 You know, his act was very clean.
02:07:09.000 He would tell.
02:07:10.000 You know, he would do impressions of Elvis and John Travolta and Sylvester Stallone.
02:07:17.000 So he's, and he would be very funny.
02:07:24.000 We were pretty good friends.
02:07:25.000 He would just, but he would play with me.
02:07:29.000 He would say, he would play that, you know, I would have a girlfriend come and he would say, So now you want me to go downstairs?
02:07:39.000 Can you imagine Andrew being this, you know, crazy guy?
02:07:43.000 Said, now I gotta go downstairs and I'll be all by myself.
02:07:48.000 And you're gonna be with this girl and you're my best friend.
02:07:52.000 And how is that gonna?
02:07:54.000 I go, get the hell out of here, she's gonna be here.
02:07:57.000 And then she would come and he would do it in front of her.
02:08:01.000 Well, you guys are gonna have fun now, and I'm gonna have to go downstairs.
02:08:06.000 There's nothing there, and you just play and play along, you know.
02:08:11.000 And then uh, uh, Tom Wilson was living there too.
02:08:15.000 Uh, Tom.
02:08:16.000 Is the guy who did Biff in Back to the Future.
02:08:21.000 He was the bad guy, right?
02:08:24.000 And so Tom was kind of a clean cut guy, and Andrew was, you know, not.
02:08:36.000 So one time I was supposed to break up with this girl.
02:08:40.000 I wanted to break up with her, and Andrew goes, I have an idea for you.
02:08:45.000 We're going to go to a jewelry store.
02:08:47.000 We're going to get a.
02:08:49.000 A gift for her, so it will be easy to break up.
02:08:53.000 So we go, we buy a ring, and I'll bring it, I brought it back, and I go, Tom, Andrew told me to buy this ring to give it to this girl, so it would be an easy breakup.
02:09:08.000 And he looks and he goes, It's an engagement ring, you know that.
02:09:13.000 And I go, But Andrew told me to buy it. 0.96
02:09:16.000 I'm going to, he goes, Tom goes, Andrew is not a representative of a human race.
02:09:26.000 So don't listen to what he's saying.
02:09:30.000 So that's how it was kind of a fun relationship.
02:09:33.000 But it was interesting because I was very enterprising.
02:09:38.000 And I'm working for Mitsi.
02:09:40.000 You know, she's paying me whatever minimum wage.
02:09:44.000 But I'm saving money.
02:09:47.000 And we live with those guys.
02:09:49.000 And we have a two car garage, but no cars in it.
02:09:53.000 So a friend of mine says to me, Why don't we go to Germany together?
02:10:00.000 We borrow some money.
02:10:01.000 We buy two Mercedes's.
02:10:04.000 And we'll sell one and we'll get one for free.
02:10:09.000 It was kind of an interesting idea.
02:10:11.000 So we went with some complications.
02:10:15.000 I was able to bring two cars and sold one.
02:10:20.000 So here's, these guys are sleeping till like noon and they don't have a car and they're just bombing around.
02:10:29.000 And I have two Mercedes in the garage.
02:10:32.000 I sell one and then I go to Europe.
02:10:37.000 They hired me to do a Bob Munchaus show, which was kind of a Johnny Carson show for England.
02:10:45.000 And I fly there and they give me a bag of money, 10,000 euros, not euros, pounds, in a bag to do this show.
02:10:56.000 So I buy a Rolls Royce and ship it to America.
02:11:01.000 So now I have a Mercedes 450SL and a Rolls Royce, but I live in a.
02:11:08.000 A room for $120 a month, right?
02:11:13.000 And so this is how weird it is.
02:11:19.000 And I want to buy a house, but I don't have enough money.
02:11:24.000 So this realtor passes by one day and I'm polishing a Rolls Royce.
02:11:31.000 And she goes, Can I borrow like a hammer to put the sign in?
02:11:36.000 I go, You know what?
02:11:37.000 You're a realtor.
02:11:38.000 Maybe you can help me.
02:11:39.000 I'm looking for a house.
02:11:43.000 And I liked when Mitzi had that big house, 5,000 square feet overlooking LA.
02:11:49.000 I'm like, I want something like that.
02:11:52.000 And I said, I tell her, I want a 5,000 square foot house with an acre of land, and I want to buy it with the view of LA, and I want to buy it for $150,000.
02:12:11.000 And I'm thinking she's going to hit me with a hammer.
02:12:14.000 She goes, I may have something for you.
02:12:18.000 And I go, Really?
02:12:20.000 And she goes, Yeah.
02:12:21.000 And there was a house literally like a block away from where Mitz's was, similar structure, only it was destroyed.
02:12:32.000 It was a house that Laney Bruce used to live in years ago.
02:12:39.000 It was Seymour Cassell, who is a character actor.
02:12:45.000 I don't know if he's still around, maybe.
02:12:47.000 Jamie can find it of him.
02:12:50.000 He was a character actor and he got into drugs and lost that house to his attorney.
02:13:01.000 And so I go look at the house.
02:13:06.000 It's totally destroyed, but my parents needed a project.
02:13:11.000 And I needed them to have a project.
02:13:13.000 So I said, How much would he do?
02:13:15.000 And he said, He'll take $150,000 because it's totally destroyed.
02:13:20.000 There's.
02:13:22.000 Stuff swimming, but there is stuff in the basement like flooded, the windows are broken, destroyed.
02:13:33.000 So I buy that house, and but I want to buy it, but I have to get all the paperwork.
02:13:44.000 I go, I need this, there is some kind of discrepancy that a sliver of the land belongs to a neighbor or something like that.
02:13:54.000 So I need to sign.
02:13:56.000 That guy Seymour Cassell is supposed to sign something off.
02:13:59.000 And I go, Where am I going to find him?
02:14:02.000 I go, The attorney goes, I know where he is.
02:14:04.000 He's in jail.
02:14:06.000 So I go to jail and I figure I'm going to offer him money to sign this paper.
02:14:14.000 And I go in, I have like $500 in my pocket, and I go, I need you to sign this paper.
02:14:25.000 And he goes, I said, How much?
02:14:28.000 And he goes, 50.
02:14:31.000 I go, $50,000?
02:14:34.000 He said, no, $50.
02:14:37.000 I go, why $50?
02:14:38.000 He said, they won't allow us more than $50 in jail.
02:14:43.000 So now I'm in jail with a $100 bill trying to get change, which is not a good place to do it.
02:14:52.000 I got it and now I own that beautiful home.
02:14:57.000 You still have it?
02:14:58.000 No, I sold it and moved to Pacific Palisades that time.
02:15:05.000 And when my kids were, my daughter was born, and then had to sell that house and lose a lot of money to move to Branson.
02:15:15.000 So.
02:15:16.000 And are you in Branson still?
02:15:17.000 I do.
02:15:18.000 Yeah.
02:15:18.000 You live in Branson?
02:15:19.000 I own.
02:15:20.000 Yeah.
02:15:20.000 I owned a theater there.
02:15:22.000 So, how did you start coming out here?
02:15:26.000 It was a desire to kind of do what I felt compelled that I can still offer.
02:15:36.000 Something valuable to the audience out there watching Nate Borghese doing that.
02:15:45.000 And he had me actually, I was in Florida and I wanted to go see his show.
02:15:54.000 And he's in this Hertz Arena, 12,000 something people.
02:16:01.000 And I asked if I could just go come see the show.
02:16:06.000 And he said, Why don't you go on stage and do a set?
02:16:11.000 And that was like, I walked out there and I felt like I was back in the 80s.
02:16:22.000 You know, the audience just, the moment they said my name, they knew who I was.
02:16:28.000 That audience knows who I am.
02:16:31.000 So they just went crazy.
02:16:33.000 And I felt like Rocky standing there bowing.
02:16:37.000 And then I did like eight minutes.
02:16:39.000 And so he's very respectful and very, he feels like, I was one of the people that kind of paved the way for comedy to be what it is today.
02:16:54.000 That's awesome.
02:16:55.000 So I've been very blessed that, you know.
02:16:58.000 And so, how did you wind up in Austin?
02:17:01.000 I came here for the festival that was that Moon Tower.
02:17:07.000 Moon Tower.
02:17:08.000 And then I had Adam, your Adam got me a spot.
02:17:14.000 And that's when I met Tony.
02:17:17.000 And Tony said, Why don't you be a guest judge on my show?
02:17:22.000 And I was going with my family to Europe because my family's from Ukraine.
02:17:31.000 So my wife's family from Ukraine.
02:17:32.000 So they moved to Europe.
02:17:35.000 And so we went there for two months.
02:17:36.000 And I said, Tony, I can't do it right now, but end of August, I would love to do it.
02:17:41.000 And that's how it all kind of came together.
02:17:45.000 Wow.
02:17:46.000 Yeah.
02:17:46.000 That's awesome.
02:17:47.000 What are you doing tonight?
02:17:49.000 I don't have any plans.
02:17:51.000 I was just hoping to get through this because you never know.
02:17:57.000 I'm hoping that, you know, I'll be happy to do whatever is out there, you know.
02:18:03.000 You were hoping to get through the show?
02:18:05.000 Well, you have to know.
02:18:08.000 I mean, your show, I don't think you can fathom how big your show is.
02:18:15.000 I mean, I know you know the numbers and you know, but.
02:18:22.000 To get to have the conversation for three hours and not really knowing where it's going to go, what's going to happen, how it's going to be, you get nervous, you know.
02:18:36.000 And I feel like I was going to Nashville and that was Nashville Comedy Festival a year and a half ago.
02:18:46.000 And I went there and I walked into Ryman's auditorium and.
02:18:54.000 Brian Dorfman, you probably know, he's a promoter.
02:18:58.000 He remembered me from the years in the past.
02:19:02.000 And there was a show that all the Nate Berghazi's proteges were doing.
02:19:14.000 And I walked in, I didn't know what was going on.
02:19:17.000 And he said, You want to go up?
02:19:20.000 And I go, Okay, I'll go up.
02:19:24.000 And I went in the middle of the show and I did 15 minutes, and the crowd gave me a standing ovation in the middle of the show.
02:19:34.000 And I know it's, I get emotional because I feel like an ugly duckling that goes in and doesn't know if these young people are going to accept you or not.
02:19:50.000 And can you still do it?
02:19:51.000 I was, I'm in Branson for 33 years.
02:19:55.000 I'm very comfortable in that environment.
02:19:58.000 But going into with the young comedians, it's like a boxer who hasn't been out there.
02:20:05.000 And there is respect, but also respect only lasts 30 seconds after they introduce you.
02:20:14.000 But then you have to prove that you got what it takes.
02:20:19.000 And that's what I feel like I want to continue to do this because I believe I can still offer something valuable to the audience that.
02:20:33.000 That family audience that could learn something from me, could laugh with me, whatever it is.
02:20:40.000 That's very wholesome, Yankov.
02:20:42.000 You're a wholesome guy.
02:20:43.000 Well, thank you.
02:20:45.000 I mean that with all sincerity.
02:20:46.000 Well, I'll tell you, it's interesting.
02:20:49.000 I was, when I graduated from my, from Pepperdine, and I came to Comedy and Magic Club in my, in Hermosa Beach.
02:21:00.000 I love that place.
02:21:01.000 Yeah, me too.
02:21:02.000 Shout out to Mike Lacey.
02:21:03.000 Yes, yes.
02:21:04.000 He's the best.
02:21:04.000 And I showed up in my, Cap and gown, kind of proud.
02:21:10.000 And Jay Leno is there all the time, every Sunday.
02:21:15.000 And Jay goes, So what's up with that?
02:21:18.000 What's up with that?
02:21:20.000 And I go, Well, I decided to get a doctorate degree because I really think that there is research on laughter that you could really help people understand it better.
02:21:35.000 And he goes, Yakov, you're a comedian.
02:21:39.000 You write a joke, you tell a joke, you pick up a check, and you go.
02:21:46.000 And you go, and that's it.
02:21:48.000 And I go, but what about like humanity?
02:21:51.000 And no, no, he goes, no, no, you don't get it.
02:21:54.000 You write a joke, you tell a joke, and you pick up a check, and that's it.
02:22:03.000 I feel like there is more that I can do.
02:22:07.000 Well, you know, that's Jay's perspective.
02:22:09.000 Right.
02:22:09.000 My perspective is much more aligned with yours.
02:22:12.000 I think there's a lot more going on.
02:22:14.000 And I think comedy is very valuable to people, including me.
02:22:17.000 If I don't feel good, then I can go watch people.
02:22:20.000 Tell great jokes and laugh.
02:22:22.000 I feel better.
02:22:23.000 I like it.
02:22:24.000 I like it.
02:22:25.000 People like it.
02:22:26.000 People keep coming to see it.
02:22:27.000 There's a reason why people come.
02:22:28.000 It's medicine.
02:22:29.000 It really is.
02:22:30.000 I know that's like very cliche.
02:22:31.000 No, no.
02:22:32.000 Say laughter is medicine, but it is.
02:22:33.000 There's something to it.
02:22:34.000 It's a lubricant.
02:22:35.000 It's like an engine without, if you don't have oil in the engine, it will not go.
02:22:43.000 And I think laughter in the relationship is that lubricant.
02:22:48.000 And with friends.
02:22:49.000 It's just a fun, Thing to do.
02:22:51.000 Absolutely.
02:22:52.000 That's one of the reasons why I like going there.
02:22:54.000 Yes.
02:22:54.000 Like we get to hang out together and laugh.
02:22:57.000 Yes.
02:22:57.000 Speaking of which, do you want to do a set tonight?
02:23:00.000 Sure.
02:23:00.000 All right.
02:23:00.000 You know anybody who can get me in?
02:23:02.000 Yeah, I got to have a guy.
02:23:04.000 It'd be my show.
02:23:05.000 I'd love it.
02:23:05.000 I'm going to do a set on my shorts tonight.
02:23:07.000 Oh, my God.
02:23:07.000 Yeah.
02:23:08.000 Okay.
02:23:08.000 I'd love it.
02:23:09.000 All right.
02:23:10.000 Oh, my goodness.
02:23:10.000 Wow.
02:23:11.000 We'll have some fun.
02:23:11.000 What a gift.
02:23:12.000 Thank you.
02:23:13.000 And if people want to see you other than that, you're on tour.
02:23:16.000 What is the website?
02:23:17.000 Is it yakov.com?
02:23:18.000 Yakov.com.
02:23:19.000 Yeah.
02:23:19.000 My next show is in Atlanta this weekend.
02:23:23.000 Well, people can go to it.
02:23:24.000 It's up on the screen.
02:23:25.000 There it is.
02:23:25.000 Yeah.
02:23:26.000 Stand up, podcast host, legend.
02:23:28.000 You have your own podcast?
02:23:30.000 I did for about a year.
02:23:32.000 What happened?
02:23:35.000 A baby was born.
02:23:36.000 Oh, you're doing a lot of good spots.
02:23:38.000 You're doing The Punchline.
02:23:39.000 You're doing The Punchline in Sacramento.
02:23:41.000 You're doing Cobbs in San Francisco.
02:23:45.000 Comedy Works in Greenville, Greenwood, rather.
02:23:48.000 That's the other comedy works.
02:23:50.000 There's two comedy works.
02:23:50.000 Nice.
02:23:51.000 Side splitters, great spots.
02:23:53.000 Beautiful.
02:23:54.000 Yeah.
02:23:55.000 People will come see you, man.
02:23:56.000 I hope so.
02:23:57.000 And you're very funny.
02:23:58.000 So it's good.
02:23:58.000 It's good to see you out there.
02:23:59.000 It's the only way.
02:24:00.000 Thanks for having me.
02:24:01.000 My pleasure.
02:24:02.000 I really enjoyed talking to you in the green room. 0.95
02:24:03.000 I'm glad we did this because that's a crazy ass story. 0.59
02:24:06.000 Thank you. 0.92
02:24:07.000 Thank you.
02:24:07.000 My pleasure.
02:24:08.000 You're a good dude, Yakov.
02:24:09.000 I love you.
02:24:09.000 Thank you.
02:24:10.000 All right.
02:24:11.000 I love you too.
02:24:12.000 Bye, everybody.