The Joe Rogan Experience - May 04, 2015


Joe Rogan Experience #643 - "Big" Jay Oakerson

Topics
Foxcatcher timeline changes Foxcatcher movie boxing Ronda Rousey armbar technique Going for the Gold face hair toiletpaper sit and wipe Ashley Madison commercials Thrinder yoga powerlifting form boxing mob mentality car chases Peyote-It Forward brain trauma Tesla Powerwall
Hosted by
Joe Rogan
Guests
"Big" Jay Oakerson
Mentioned
Bruce Jenner Brian Redband Ashley Madison Jesus Christ Joey Ramone Floyd Mayweather Luke Rockhold Mike Tyson Duncan Trussell Draw Muhammad Provodnikov Dee Dee Ramone John Lithgow Emo Phillips Rod Stewart Joey Diaz Bobby Lee Sugar Ray Mark McGrath Richard Pryor Live Manny Pacquiao and 130 more
Joe Rogan Experience #642 - Rich Roll Joe Rogan Experience #644 - Brad Williams

Episode Stats


Length

2 hours and 58 minutes

Words per minute

200.92

Word count

35,865

Sentence count

4,226

Harmful content

Misogyny

234

sentences flagged

Toxicity

1,447

sentences flagged

Hate speech

161

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

This week, Big J talks about the protests in Baltimore, the recent shooting of a black man by a white cop, and the new movie "Jizz in soup" and much, much more. Also, we talk about the latest in the Foxcatcher scandal and how they should have handled it better. Also, Bigj talks about how much he's sick of the way things are being made in Hollywood and how much money they should be making from it and why they should stop making it. And, of course, we get into the latest and greatest in pop culture and pop culture in general, including the latest movie and TV show about the death of Tupac Shakur. We also talk about why it's not okay to call someone who died by a cop a "jizz" and why that's a bad thing. Just pay the 2.95 postage and you're good to go. Enjoy! Bigj is a comedian, writer, podcaster, and podcaster from Los Angeles, California. He's been around for a long time and is a big part of the LA comedy scene. He's also a friend of mine and I think he's one of the funniest people I've ever met. If you like what he's doing, you're going to like him. Big J is a good dude. I hope you enjoy this episode, brotha. Cheers, bruh. -J.J. & Bigj -BJ is a regular on the pod cast, and he's a good friend of the podcast, too. . and we're a fan of the podcast, so you should listen to this episode of his music too. Big J's music is really good. and it's a lot of good vibes. Jizz is a great guy too. Jizz, too, so listen to the whole episode of this episode. XOXO -Jizz is great, so don't forget to leave us a review on Apple Podcasts and we'll send him a review of the song "I'm going to send you a review and review it on Apple Music too. Thank you for listening to it so you can help us send us your thoughts on the episode of Jizz's new song "The Big Jizz" by Jizz on the Bigjizz's song "What the F#ck That's Good, Jizz in Soup"

Transcript

Transcripts from "The Joe Rogan Experience" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:01.000 Makina.
00:00:02.000 Are we live?
00:00:04.000 Yeah?
00:00:05.000 Ustream.tv forward slash...
00:00:08.000 Big J is here.
00:00:10.000 Big J is here.
00:00:12.000 Bam.
00:00:13.000 And I'm tweeting, and we're live. 0.99
00:00:15.000 What the fuck, Big J? Welcome back, sir. 0.99
00:00:19.000 I heard you were punching white people in Baltimore. 0.94
00:00:20.000 Is that true? 0.98
00:00:21.000 You just ran around just punching random white people? 0.93
00:00:23.000 Well, you gotta get all the fans you can get, right? 0.98
00:00:23.000 That's it. 0.98
00:00:25.000 If you want to be down, that's the move right now. 0.99
00:00:27.000 Be super upset with white people. 0.95
00:00:29.000 I had an argument with a comic about Baltimore this week. 0.97
00:00:35.000 He was very pro the violent protest of it.
00:00:40.000 White dude. 0.69
00:00:42.000 You know, like a hipster white comic, I would say.
00:00:45.000 I was so surprised, because I always thought they were supposed to be the tender guys.
00:00:49.000 And his comment, I couldn't believe the coldness in him saying... 0.98
00:00:53.000 He was like, so big fucking deal, they tear apart... 0.97
00:01:07.000 It's totally unrelated. 1.00
00:01:08.000 They did it in Ferguson to businesses that were owned by black people.
00:01:11.000 There were some instances of people burning down businesses that had absolutely nothing to do with any of the pro police, you know, group.
00:01:20.000 There were people that just lived in the community, and then all of a sudden everything got smashed. 0.98
00:01:24.000 In Oakland, when the guy got shot in Oakland, they smashed a bank, and someone wrote, Fuck Capitalism on it. 0.99
00:01:32.000 Like, okay, really? 0.99
00:01:34.000 Like, is that what this is about? 1.00
00:01:35.000 The fucking cop killing the guy is about capitalism? 0.99
00:01:39.000 Is that the one, the quote-unquote accident in the train station? 1.00
00:01:42.000 Yeah, that one was fucked. 0.99
00:01:44.000 Did you see the movie they made of it? 1.00
00:01:45.000 No.
00:01:46.000 They made a movie of it.
00:01:47.000 I like when they do this with a lot of Hollywood stuff.
00:01:49.000 It's such a hilarious phoned-in thing.
00:01:52.000 Do you remember the Biggie Smalls movie?
00:01:55.000 I never saw it.
00:01:55.000 Did you ever see that one?
00:01:56.000 What was it?
00:01:57.000 Did you see it, Brian?
00:01:58.000 No.
00:01:58.000 It was called Notorious.
00:01:59.000 Oh, yeah.
00:02:00.000 I saw it once. 0.99
00:02:01.000 Who the fuck played It actually was pretty good. 0.99
00:02:03.000 Really? 0.99
00:02:04.000 The preview looked like he did a good job. 1.00
00:02:06.000 Jamie, pull up a fucking preview. 0.99
00:02:07.000 I need to see this. 0.99
00:02:08.000 The guy did a good job, I guess.
00:02:09.000 But what was funny was, the night he died in the movie, he made phone calls to everyone.
00:02:15.000 And he's like, you know, to his wife.
00:02:16.000 Like, I'm going to be good to you.
00:02:17.000 Told his mom.
00:02:18.000 Oh, no!
00:02:18.000 We're not going to worry about money again.
00:02:19.000 And all these things that are not true. 0.97
00:02:21.000 In that Fruitvale Station movie, which is about the Oakland guy, they literally made that day, the guy he sold drugs for came and gave him drugs, and he was like, nah, I don't want to do this shit no more. 0.98
00:02:31.000 No! 0.99
00:02:31.000 I'm going to be better than my daughter. 0.99
00:02:34.000 And the thing is like... 1.00
00:02:36.000 You can't just make shit like that up. 0.98
00:02:38.000 Yeah, and another comedian actually named Chris Tinkle pointed out, because he knew the story. 0.99
00:02:41.000 He's from that area.
00:02:41.000 And he said, he was like, it's already tragic anyway.
00:02:44.000 Yes.
00:02:45.000 This is a tragic situation.
00:02:46.000 That kid got killed.
00:02:47.000 Whatever was going on, he probably didn't deserve to get killed by a cop, you know, so accidentally or otherwise.
00:02:53.000 So it's just like, why would you have to add like a...
00:02:55.000 And he was going to go back.
00:02:56.000 He was going to go to University of Phoenix online.
00:02:58.000 Dude, I can spell it out nice and simple.
00:03:01.000 This is exactly what it is.
00:03:03.000 There's a very high percentage, very high percentage of the movie business that's filled with wonderful, creative people.
00:03:10.000 Fantastic folks who just want to make good movies like Ex Machina.
00:03:14.000 I saw Ex Machina this week. 0.99
00:03:15.000 Holy shit, is that good. 1.00
00:03:16.000 God damn, that's a good movie. 1.00
00:03:18.000 Amazing special effects? 1.00
00:03:19.000 Was it one of those movies?
00:03:19.000 One of the best movies I've ever seen in my life.
00:03:21.000 And I don't want to say anything more about it.
00:03:23.000 We'll talk about it a little bit. 0.99
00:03:24.000 But the point is, most of them are trying to do shit like that. 1.00
00:03:28.000 But there are a few out there, and those ones will stand out, and they will just fucking jizz. 1.00
00:03:35.000 They will just fucking jizz on anything. 0.99
00:03:38.000 Jizz in every soup you make. 1.00
00:03:40.000 They gotta add their little fucking spooge to all your ideas, and they fuck everything up, man. 1.00
00:03:45.000 And especially, it's gross, especially gross when they do a real live story. 0.99
00:03:50.000 A lot of times are dudes who are still alive, and they just butcher the story. 0.99
00:03:53.000 Like that fucking wrestler movie? 1.00
00:03:55.000 What the fuck was that? 1.00
00:03:56.000 We've talked about it before. 1.00
00:03:58.000 Foxcatcher.
00:03:58.000 What is it called?
00:03:59.000 Thank you.
00:03:59.000 Fox!
00:04:00.000 The one about John Hunt or what is it?
00:04:03.000 Mark Hunt.
00:04:04.000 No, no, no.
00:04:04.000 Mark Hunt's a fighter.
00:04:05.000 Mike Cutter.
00:04:06.000 What is the guy's name?
00:04:07.000 Pharmaceutical company...
00:04:07.000 John...
00:04:10.000 Yeah, John DuPont.
00:04:11.000 DuPont, thank you. 0.60
00:04:12.000 John DuPont, who's a crazy, murderous cocaine fiend, who shot this wrestler, Dave Schultz, who's a famous wrestler. 0.98
00:04:19.000 Well, the movie's about his brother, Mark Schultz, who's still alive, and they just add a bunch of shit to it, make a bunch of shit up, change the timeline around, change the success story of his life. 0.99
00:04:30.000 Also throw some gay undertone for no reason. 1.00
00:04:34.000 Gay and coke, doing coke with a gay guy. 1.00
00:04:36.000 You got frosted tips. 1.00
00:04:38.000 Short shorts.
00:04:39.000 The whole thing was like, what's going on here?
00:04:41.000 What are you doing, man?
00:04:42.000 You know what's one of the biggest mess?
00:04:44.000 I'm from Philly, and that story happened outside of Philadelphia.
00:04:47.000 I thought it was Connecticut.
00:04:49.000 That Foxcatcher thing is in Philly?
00:04:51.000 It's Pennsylvania.
00:04:51.000 It's outside Philly.
00:04:52.000 Oh, wow.
00:04:53.000 I'm confused.
00:04:53.000 But John DuPont, it was like a multiple day...
00:04:57.000 Also, one of the most interesting things was that it was a standoff for days with the cops.
00:05:01.000 But they made it like he killed a guy and then he walked out of his house and they just arrested him.
00:05:05.000 It was such like a...
00:05:05.000 They speed through all the things that are real and interesting to add some weird Hollywood...
00:05:10.000 Like, they have to force in the fact that maybe he was gay for this guy.
00:05:13.000 It had nothing to do with anything. 0.73
00:05:14.000 They just decided to make him gay.
00:05:16.000 Just to make the story more fun. 0.99
00:05:18.000 You gonna give me airhead in my helicopter?
00:05:21.000 Yeah, they were hanging out, doing bumps in a helicopter, eyeing each other, sweating.
00:05:26.000 Just the whole thing was so fun. 0.96
00:05:28.000 Dude, they changed shit that they didn't have to change, like historical shit, like the fact that he was already a world champion, one of the best wrestlers on earth. 0.98
00:05:36.000 They made him out to be like a guy who was failing and falling apart. 0.99
00:05:38.000 They also had him fight in the UFC. He did fight once in the UFC, but against a white guy in the real UFC fought against a black guy named Big Gary Goodrich.
00:05:47.000 It's a historic match.
00:05:49.000 If you're a martial arts historian, that match is a historic match. 0.98
00:05:54.000 Because he was an Olympic gold medalist who came and just took down one of the best MMA fighters at the time at will and showed the difference between world-class wrestling and this fucking bullshit that these guys were doing in the gym. 0.96
00:06:04.000 They were infants in comparison to his wrestling skill. 0.98
00:06:07.000 But they changed the timeline of it.
00:06:09.000 They had him watching the UFC in 87. The UFC wasn't even made until 93. So they just fucked with everything just to gay it up and add a little of this and a little...
00:06:20.000 Just to get a little fucking hunched over the script. 0.99
00:06:23.000 Yeah, yeah, that was my idea. 0.88
00:06:25.000 Basically, the script, man, the story structure just didn't work.
00:06:30.000 There was something missing. 0.92
00:06:31.000 Gay stuff. 0.98
00:06:32.000 When they get those actors, they don't want it to just be in independent film theaters. 0.99
00:06:37.000 So they gotta Hollywood some horseshit story into it all.
00:06:40.000 It's just so, it's so depressing that they do that to a movie that's a real story. 0.98
00:06:44.000 Because then you have in your head, oh, well he almost got gay with the guy, he did coke, he saw the UFC in 87, you have all these things in your head.
00:06:51.000 And then you start reading, and you go, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, that's not the case.
00:06:57.000 Like, there was, like, he wrote a list on Facebook, Mark Schultz did, of all the inaccuracies of the Foxcatcher movie. 0.99
00:07:03.000 It's fucking ridiculous. 1.00
00:07:04.000 It's ridiculous. 1.00
00:07:05.000 They just, they fucked with everything. 1.00
00:07:07.000 And he didn't even know because he was like a consultant on the movie, I believe. 0.99
00:07:07.000 They changed everything. 0.99
00:07:09.000 Well, I'm sure he probably knew a little, but what the fuck is he going to do? 0.91
00:07:13.000 They're probably giving him an assload of money, right? 0.98
00:07:16.000 We're going to frost your tips.
00:07:17.000 He's a wrestler, a wrestling coach at Brigham Young.
00:07:20.000 I mean, he had to stop MMA fighting because the school that he was teaching wrestling at didn't want him doing it.
00:07:27.000 It was a different time. 0.69
00:07:28.000 You know, it was like 96 or 97 or whatever the fuck it was when he fought.
00:07:31.000 That was right on the end of, like, UFC being, like, sumo wrestler fights a ninja. 0.79
00:07:36.000 It was still that.
00:07:38.000 Still that.
00:07:38.000 He was still using bare knuckles.
00:07:40.000 There was still...
00:07:40.000 I think he would still wear shoes.
00:07:43.000 When I started, you could wear shoes. 0.84
00:07:45.000 You couldn't punch the balls when I first got there. 0.96
00:07:47.000 You couldn't punch the balls, and you couldn't... 0.99
00:07:49.000 I don't think you could pull hair anymore. 0.97
00:07:50.000 They got rid of that early on, too.
00:07:52.000 It's so fun.
00:07:54.000 Growing up, I watched a documentary recently, too, the UFC 20. And having that go through my life, watching that...
00:08:01.000 Sport grow in my lifetime for me.
00:08:03.000 I remember me and my stepfather ordered the first one ever Wow when it was tournament style you need to go out and fight like three times And we thought it was like the greatest thing of all time But now to watch it go from like, you know, no shoes no geese no gouging not all these things that you know that But you have to that has to happen and then they go.
00:08:20.000 Oh, yeah Now you can't just you can't just break a guy's finger because you're losing and Yeah, well, why can't you?
00:08:27.000 If you break a guy's arm, how come you can't break a guy's finger?
00:08:30.000 I disagree with all the thoughts about small joint manipulation, because the reality is, if someone's trying to manipulate your joint, it usually works in defense.
00:08:41.000 Say if you're trying to grab a guy and you're trying to choke him and he starts pulling on your fingers.
00:08:46.000 Well, you can just pull your fingers away.
00:08:48.000 You know, it's not like it's automatic that he's gonna break your fingers.
00:08:51.000 Sure.
00:08:51.000 You just have to be more aware of it.
00:08:52.000 Like, it's realistic.
00:08:54.000 Like, if all this guy has to do is pull your finger back to stop you from doing a choke, well, then he did the right thing.
00:09:00.000 Why are you taking that away from him when it's okay for him to choke you?
00:09:03.000 Oh, yeah, you have to, like, actually get under the hand itself completely right.
00:09:06.000 Yeah, but why are you taking away the guy's ability to pull on your fingers?
00:09:09.000 Yeah, if he pulls on your fingers, you better get your fingers out of there and then try to choke them again.
00:09:13.000 You know, it just makes sense to me.
00:09:15.000 I actually thought, because it never happens, that I thought there was a rule of no choking in the UFC, like a direct on choke, like you're choking someone against the wall.
00:09:23.000 But you can do that, apparently.
00:09:25.000 It's the most...
00:09:27.000 Unrealistic move.
00:09:28.000 It's the same reason no one headlocks like you did in the schoolyard as a kid, where you have the guy in a bulldog position.
00:09:33.000 That so rarely ever happens in UFC. Honestly, I think you're wrong.
00:09:38.000 I think you're wrong.
00:09:39.000 I think it is illegal to grab the neck like that.
00:09:42.000 I think it's illegal to do that.
00:09:43.000 Straight on?
00:09:43.000 Yeah.
00:09:44.000 I think it used to be legal, but now it's illegal.
00:09:46.000 Really?
00:09:46.000 Yeah, I need to find out about that.
00:09:48.000 There was something about, well, there's a bunch of weird spots that you can't do.
00:09:51.000 Like, do you know you can't hit a guy in the back of the head?
00:09:53.000 Yeah.
00:09:53.000 Can't hit a guy in the back.
00:09:54.000 Sure. 0.93
00:09:55.000 You get kicked in the back of the head all the time. 0.93
00:09:58.000 When you get hit with a head kick, one of the things about a head kick is, you know, the shin's kind of coming around here, and a lot of times, like a high percentage, the foot and the instep are bang, wrapping right around the back of your head, way fucking harder than you can ever punch. 0.74
00:10:13.000 So the idea that you don't get hit in the back of the head is crazy because there's a totally legal shot that's basically the back of the head.
00:10:20.000 Nobody ever gets in trouble for kicking somebody in the back of the head.
00:10:24.000 And it happens all the time.
00:10:26.000 It's just ground and pound.
00:10:27.000 When you're grounded and pounding is usually when guys get in trouble for hitting the back of the head, which is the most ridiculous because that's when guys are moving around.
00:10:34.000 Yeah, he's trying to protect them.
00:10:35.000 If all he had to do is get to the back of your head.
00:10:37.000 But stand-up-wise, a lot of guys get hit in the back of the head.
00:10:40.000 They get hit with clubbing punches, like in melees.
00:10:44.000 They never get in trouble for that.
00:10:45.000 And there's a lot of elbows that go to the back of the head because you're up against the cage and in areas where you get in trouble hitting them somehow and ground and pound.
00:10:52.000 It seems almost like Elbows to the back of the head and punches to the back of the head are really only recognized clearly when it's ground and pound.
00:10:59.000 What was that Diego Sanchez elbowing the top of Clay Guida's head?
00:11:05.000 I don't know how those weren't illegal.
00:11:08.000 It seems like by the rules that should have been illegal.
00:11:10.000 The top is fine.
00:11:11.000 The top is fine.
00:11:12.000 It's the base of the skull that's supposed to be the real danger area.
00:11:15.000 It's the back of the head and the base of the skull.
00:11:17.000 You could elbow top of the head?
00:11:18.000 Yes.
00:11:19.000 The top of the head's fine.
00:11:20.000 The top of the head's fine.
00:11:22.000 The sides of the head are fine.
00:11:23.000 And there's been a bunch of debate about what is the mohawk.
00:11:27.000 The mohawk meaning this is the area that can't hit.
00:11:29.000 The mohawk in the back of the head, like that strip down where the spine is.
00:11:33.000 Some people extend it more towards the ears, and some people keep it more narrow, and some people lower it so it's just the base.
00:11:38.000 Some people think that right here, sort of the mid-back of the head is fine.
00:11:43.000 So it's open to debate, but the idea is ultimately that the base of the spine is very dangerous to hit. 0.99
00:11:50.000 And then if you hit someone there really hard, you might be able to separate their fucking brain from their spinal column. 0.99
00:11:56.000 Hi-ya-ya! 1.00
00:11:57.000 Hi-ya-ya! 1.00
00:11:59.000 Son of a bitch. 1.00
00:12:00.000 It was a big move in the old days. 1.00
00:12:02.000 See, in the old days, one of the best moves was you would take a guy's back and then you would smash the back of his head with elbows.
00:12:08.000 Like, Henzo Gracie did that to, like, this judo specialist that he fought.
00:12:12.000 God, I want to say, like, I forget the organization.
00:12:14.000 It might have been Mars.
00:12:16.000 Or it might have been like one of those one of those like really really young old-school Martial arts promotions that never really made it. 0.98
00:12:24.000 So Hanzo gets this guy down gets his back and just fucking BOOM! BOOM! Just smashes the back of his head because it's totally legal back then and you realize like that takes away all your rear naked chokes all that stuff That's like not even nearly as effective as doing that like if you got a guy's head If you've got him face down and you're smashing the back of his head with elbows while you have the back mount in, 0.98
00:12:47.000 there's very little he can do to defend that.
00:12:49.000 It used to be legal.
00:12:51.000 It's funny, even though they take away from the sport, it still stays a thousand times more interesting than boxing.
00:12:57.000 You see, man, everybody says that, right?
00:13:00.000 But I really found that fight interesting.
00:13:02.000 I'm of the minority that thought that it was a really interesting fight.
00:13:05.000 Yeah, everybody was mad.
00:13:06.000 You know, we waited for this, we waited for that.
00:13:07.000 I'm like, come on.
00:13:09.000 As a person who appreciates boxing, that fight to me was pretty wild.
00:13:14.000 It was intense to watch because you know Manny Pacquiao has been able to get his gloves on everybody he fights.
00:13:19.000 Everybody he fights, he lights up.
00:13:21.000 He gets a hold of you eventually, and he lights you up.
00:13:24.000 And you might get him like Marquez got him, but...
00:13:27.000 Before Marquez got him, it's not like Pacquiao didn't crack him.
00:13:30.000 You know, they weren't going back and forth and back and forth.
00:13:33.000 Just Marquez has a legendary chin and awesome punching power, and he eventually knocked Pacquiao out. 0.78
00:13:37.000 But Pacquiao is in these wars with Margarita, wars with Cotto, you know, just bashed the shit out of Chris Algieri.
00:13:45.000 He's real slick and moves real well, just gets you. 0.96
00:13:48.000 He's that pretty boy white guy. 1.00
00:13:49.000 He's a pretty boy white guy, but he's a bad motherfucker. 1.00
00:13:51.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:13:51.000 But Manny Pacquiao just could not get to Floyd. 0.99
00:13:54.000 The one time he did get to him, it's like nothing.
00:13:57.000 Floyd just covered up, used his defense, kept shaking his head like, nope, nothing.
00:14:01.000 Nope, nothing.
00:14:02.000 Manny just couldn't get him. 0.99
00:14:04.000 To me, that was impressive as fuck. 0.99
00:14:06.000 The way he was moving. 0.99
00:14:08.000 Every time Manny would come for that blitz, Floyd was gone.
00:14:11.000 He just wasn't there.
00:14:13.000 It was just super slick boxing to me.
00:14:15.000 I'm from Philly, so I spent a lifetime with Bernard Hopkins, you know, just watching him and rooting for him of these really long, slow fights.
00:14:24.000 They really are like, they just take for us.
00:14:26.000 I think Floyd Mayweather is kind of the same thing for me.
00:14:29.000 You know, I just watched, again, man, that, you see that Tyson documentary that's on cable all the time, where it's just him sitting and talking in the white shirt?
00:14:36.000 When they go to that footage, once in a while I'll even watch that Fox Sports will do the, you know, the all-day, just Tyson's fights.
00:14:44.000 But watching that early footage of him training and just how fast he was and what he was doing, how come there hasn't been another Mike Tyson since Mike Tyson?
00:14:52.000 There's been arguably six Jordans since Jordan.
00:14:56.000 You need a lot of things to come together correctly to make a Mike Tyson.
00:15:01.000 You need a lot of things.
00:15:03.000 Also, that talent, I think, in the last decade jumps to MMA. Yeah.
00:15:07.000 I don't know, man.
00:15:09.000 I don't know.
00:15:10.000 I mean, there's still a lot of guys who really like boxing.
00:15:12.000 You know, I got in a famous argument years back with this guy Lou DiBella on ESPN where I was telling him that boxing was going to get swallowed up.
00:15:23.000 I like boxing.
00:15:27.000 I've always liked boxing.
00:15:29.000 I've been a huge fan since I was a little kid, man.
00:15:31.000 Just always been a fan of it.
00:15:33.000 I also am a big fan of kickboxing.
00:15:36.000 I'm a big fan of glory, and I'm a big fan of Muay Thai.
00:15:39.000 Because I think that there's things that you pull off in just straight kickboxing or boxing that you just can't do in MMA. Because guys will clinch you, they'll throw you to the ground.
00:15:48.000 You can't get it off. 0.99
00:15:49.000 You can't do most of this shit Floyd Mayweather does with leg kicks. 1.00
00:15:52.000 As soon as leg kicks are in the mix, you can't do most of this shit. 0.99
00:15:55.000 But to me, what he's doing is incredible. 0.99
00:15:58.000 I mean, it's artistic.
00:16:00.000 He's beating the game.
00:16:01.000 He's going out at 48-0 with no brain scrambles.
00:16:06.000 Yeah.
00:16:07.000 I mean, he's only been, like, tagged that I can remember twice, three times at maximum.
00:16:13.000 Never been really fucking battered to the point where, like, the fight's gonna be stopped and he's gotta come back, like Gotti Ward or anything like that. 0.98
00:16:20.000 None of that shit. 0.97
00:16:21.000 But if you're gonna stay interested in boxing now, you have to be a real fan of, like, the sweet science. 0.99
00:16:25.000 You know what I mean?
00:16:26.000 Like, the quote-unquote.
00:16:27.000 Because, like, there's just no...
00:16:31.000 People want to see knockout. 1.00
00:16:32.000 At the end of the day, we're all standing in a gladiator cage and we all want to see people get knocked out.
00:16:37.000 You want to see that violence that you...
00:16:39.000 MMA is such a scary thing to the layman that boxing has become less scary.
00:16:46.000 Look at the size of those gloves.
00:16:47.000 These guys are going multiple rounds and they're getting hit with a sponge over your fist a little bit.
00:16:55.000 It just draws people's attention more.
00:16:59.000 I can.
00:17:00.000 I'm not just saying this.
00:17:02.000 Here's what you'll never do.
00:17:04.000 A girl will never go retroactive from UFC to boxing. 1.00
00:17:09.000 A girl will? 1.00
00:17:09.000 I don't think so. 1.00
00:17:10.000 But girls very easily, I find, get into UFC. Really? 1.00
00:17:14.000 I think girls get into UFC very easily. 0.99
00:17:16.000 Very, very easily.
00:17:17.000 What do you think that is? 0.99
00:17:18.000 Some gladiator gene shit? 1.00
00:17:20.000 They want to get some gladiator sperm in their body? 1.00
00:17:22.000 I think there's that actual, yeah, I think there's like the machismo of the whole thing.
00:17:27.000 And then also, in UFC very specifically, but in most of the televised MMA stuff, actually, I mean, UFC really does it, like, the best.
00:17:37.000 Like, if you just give your girl two episodes... 0.98
00:17:41.000 Of, like, the build-up shit. 0.97
00:17:43.000 Like, Dana Cormier, Jon Jones, like, she invested interest in that, because we watched, I made her go back and watch Jon Jones, like, first thing when he came out, he was the hero. 0.99
00:17:52.000 You put her on a course?
00:17:54.000 Yeah.
00:17:54.000 Just like, I made her watch, you know, that half-hour thing of him, like, you know, I saved the old woman from getting robbed, and all this thing, and his story, and his kind of hard luck story, and growing up, and she was like, wow, I really like this guy.
00:18:04.000 I'm like, yeah, watch his things now.
00:18:05.000 Like, he just, his personality is different, and he just made himself, like, the villain, sort of.
00:18:10.000 Well, I don't think he names.
00:18:12.000 I think villains in actual sports, though, not wrestling.
00:18:15.000 What's funny about that, even in any kind of sport, actually, even someone who hates wrestling, Don't you think right now is a great time to get chicks into it, 1.00
00:18:36.000 too, because of Ronda Rousey?
00:18:37.000 Like, there's never been a female fighter like Ronda Rousey. 0.99
00:18:41.000 A hot chick that beats the fuck out of everybody. 1.00
00:18:43.000 She's so hot, and she really is. 0.98
00:18:44.000 There's a video of her with Luke Rockhold, and she's got Luke Rockhold in what we call spiderweb.
00:18:50.000 It's when you try to finish an arm bar. 1.00
00:18:51.000 Luke Rockhold is a fucking monster, okay? 1.00
00:18:54.000 He's like 6'3", he cuts down to 185. He's usually way over 200 pounds. 1.00
00:18:59.000 He's a fucking stud at jujitsu. 0.98
00:19:02.000 And Rhonda Arm, she completes the arm bar on him. 1.00
00:19:04.000 Like, he's defending.
00:19:05.000 Like, he's really defending.
00:19:06.000 And she completes it, and he has to tap.
00:19:08.000 That's how badass she is. 1.00
00:19:09.000 I don't think you know, if you've never been armbarred before, you don't know how ridiculous that is. 0.99
00:19:15.000 A guy like Luke Rockhold should have retarded defense. 1.00
00:19:19.000 He's an ace-level MMA black belt. 0.84
00:19:22.000 Look at this.
00:19:22.000 This is Luke Rockhold on the bottom here.
00:19:24.000 Okay, Luke Rockhold, again, is world-class in the UFC at 185 pounds.
00:19:29.000 Just beat the fuck out of Lyoto Machida. 0.81
00:19:32.000 I mean, destroyed him. 0.99
00:19:33.000 Took him to the ground, controlled him, smashed him.
00:19:37.000 Finished out the round.
00:19:38.000 And here he is trying to defend against Ronda Rousey's armbar.
00:19:42.000 And she's got a bunch of different techniques she uses to attack the grip that he's using. 1.00
00:19:46.000 She keeps adjusting and readjusting.
00:19:48.000 Now, see how he stepped over her head right there? 0.99
00:19:50.000 That's like fucking DEFCON 4. Like, he knows he's in some serious trouble. 0.99
00:19:54.000 Because if she straightens out his arm, he's done, and he's got a tap.
00:19:57.000 And she's seconds away from straightening out his arm. 0.90
00:19:59.000 And he's going to get to the situation, tap, tap, tap.
00:20:01.000 He had a tap. 1.00
00:20:02.000 She fucking tapped him, dude. 1.00
00:20:04.000 She fights at 135 as a woman. 1.00
00:20:07.000 He fights 50 pounds heavier as one of the best men in the world. 0.99
00:20:13.000 That's how fucking good her armbar technique is. 1.00
00:20:16.000 There's never been a fighter in any fucking sport like her before. 1.00
00:20:21.000 That's like a total pioneer. 0.98
00:20:24.000 There's no one before her like her.
00:20:26.000 She so impressed me on that last one.
00:20:29.000 Was it Katsangana?
00:20:30.000 Yeah.
00:20:31.000 Because, I know it was over in 14 seconds, but...
00:20:35.000 Watching it just in real time, I was like, that was a series of lucky things that worked out for her in that position.
00:20:42.000 Not luck, though.
00:20:43.000 And then when she said in the interview, she said, I've been working on that, you know, doing the on-board from that transition.
00:20:43.000 No, no.
00:20:51.000 And then when you watch it in slow motion, you see her make a fucking decision to step over her body. 1.00
00:20:58.000 It was one of the craziest things I've ever seen. 0.99
00:20:59.000 Yeah, she's terrifying.
00:21:01.000 She's terrifying.
00:21:02.000 And she's not like a cyborg Was terrifying, but so much because of the size.
00:21:08.000 It wasn't like any kind of a necessary...
00:21:09.000 I mean, she had a skill set, but it wasn't that that was so...
00:21:11.000 It was just like...
00:21:12.000 She was a thousand times bigger than that.
00:21:14.000 Kind of like a man.
00:21:15.000 Yeah.
00:21:16.000 I mean, let's be...
00:21:17.000 It was like China. 0.97
00:21:18.000 It was like China at her height. 0.98
00:21:19.000 Way worse than China. 1.00
00:21:20.000 Way worse than China. 1.00
00:21:21.000 Big-wise.
00:21:22.000 Yeah, she was like the size. 0.96
00:21:23.000 But it was different because you were getting to see her actually hit people. 0.54
00:21:27.000 You know, like China was really impressive because she was big and strong. 1.00
00:21:31.000 She was on Fear Factor.
00:21:33.000 China's yoked. 0.95
00:21:34.000 I mean, she's a big girl. 1.00
00:21:35.000 If you had to wrestle her, that's a goddamn tussle. 1.00
00:21:39.000 That's a big gal. 1.00
00:21:40.000 You know, she's strong as fuck. 1.00
00:21:41.000 You ever see a sex tape with her? 1.00
00:21:42.000 That's wrestling. 0.99
00:21:43.000 Stop! 1.00
00:21:44.000 Stop it! 1.00
00:21:44.000 Pussy boner. 1.00
00:21:45.000 That's total wrestling. 1.00
00:21:46.000 I'm trying to forget! 0.99
00:21:48.000 Did you watch the one where she did anal? 1.00
00:21:49.000 Oh, that was even better. 0.99
00:21:50.000 The pro one?
00:21:51.000 More than one?
00:21:52.000 Oh, she did pro one. 0.96
00:21:53.000 She did professional porns. 0.99
00:21:55.000 It fell apart, but yeah, she did one where it's backdoor to China. 0.97
00:21:58.000 Add a little poop on it.
00:21:59.000 Ew, did it?
00:22:00.000 I remember it having a little poop. 0.96
00:22:02.000 But it was like a really famous porn dude. 0.96
00:22:05.000 Went for it. 1.00
00:22:06.000 Poor bastard. 1.00
00:22:07.000 Both of them. 1.00
00:22:08.000 I don't know.
00:22:09.000 But my point was like, you're not supposed to say the cyborg looked like a man. 0.95
00:22:14.000 But when she was beating the fuck out of Gina Carano, she was feeling like a man. 0.94
00:22:17.000 It wasn't like the classic female body type. 1.00
00:22:20.000 So when she got busted for male steroids, everybody's like...
00:22:24.000 Of course, yeah.
00:22:25.000 She looks different now, though, man.
00:22:26.000 She's become more feminine, a lot more feminine.
00:22:29.000 But there's an honest debate as to how much of what you do to your body when you alter it that severely, how much you change that's permanent.
00:22:38.000 They've done these studies on athletes that have taken anabolic steroids, and they've had permanent effects on their strength.
00:22:47.000 Permanent.
00:22:48.000 Not just temporary, but permanent.
00:22:50.000 Permanent improvements in strength.
00:22:53.000 And so they wonder, like, how much of, you know, her getting off the male hormones, like, how much does she lose?
00:22:58.000 Does she lose all of it?
00:22:59.000 Is it still fair?
00:23:00.000 I mean, what is it?
00:23:01.000 I don't know.
00:23:01.000 You know, my stepfather, I think, is a pretty naturally strong guy, but he did a bunch of steroids when he was younger.
00:23:07.000 Powerlifting, that's what he did.
00:23:09.000 And, you know, even through his 40s, and, you know, he's in his 50s now, like, the guy can still go out there and bench on just a day, throw up, like, 350 pounds.
00:23:19.000 I mean I remember in his 30s like we're doing like 455 and shit and he's not you know he weighs like you know a buck 70, buck 75. Yeah those powerlifter dudes man that's a totally different type of move in your body.
00:23:19.000 Yeah.
00:23:30.000 That's like some severe strength that's required to do like all those.
00:23:34.000 But I'm saying but the steroids I believe like definitely you still you still build a base I think is what happened.
00:23:40.000 I think it raises your base.
00:23:41.000 It definitely can.
00:23:42.000 I mean, according to these studies.
00:23:44.000 But the question is, it gets more complicated when it's a woman. 1.00
00:23:47.000 Because it's not even like she took more of what she already had.
00:23:51.000 She actually introduced some stuff that she's not supposed to have.
00:23:54.000 I mean, you do have a little bit of testosterone when you're a woman, but nothing like the levels that they take when they get into bodybuilding or powerlifting. 0.97
00:24:01.000 Like even track and field women. 1.00
00:24:05.000 People get caught all the time taking shit. 1.00
00:24:07.000 Because it works! 1.00
00:24:08.000 I mean, it changes their body. 0.89
00:24:10.000 Have you ever seen, like, bodybuilder porn? 0.96
00:24:12.000 Like, girl bodybuilder porn? 0.99
00:24:13.000 Like, just nude pictures? 1.00
00:24:14.000 I mean, it's a man's body.
00:24:17.000 I was watching one of those My Strange Addiction shows.
00:24:20.000 And there was a lady that was addicted to bodybuilding. 1.00
00:24:23.000 And her sister was on, as a point of reference.
00:24:26.000 It was really interesting.
00:24:27.000 Like, her sister's like, you're getting bigger.
00:24:29.000 Are you going to keep getting bigger?
00:24:30.000 She's like, I just love it.
00:24:32.000 This is what I look like now.
00:24:33.000 I love it.
00:24:34.000 I can't wait.
00:24:34.000 How often do you work out?
00:24:37.000 And she's like, I work out like three days a week.
00:24:39.000 She's like, I work out seven hours a day.
00:24:41.000 She was working out six, seven hours a day. 1.00
00:24:43.000 Her fucking head was as big as Tito Ortiz's and my head glued together. 1.00
00:24:48.000 She's a giant fucking neck, huge traps. 1.00
00:24:51.000 Look at this broad. 1.00
00:24:52.000 Yeah.
00:24:52.000 Is that her?
00:24:53.000 Is that the one from the show?
00:24:54.000 Look at the size of this lady. 1.00
00:24:54.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:24:56.000 Jesus fucking Christ. 0.99
00:24:58.000 Me and, uh, years ago, maybe 2005 or something, 2006, me and Patrice did the nasty show in Montreal together, and after the show, there was a bodybuilder chick who was a white girl, way into him, and really, and she was just, 0.99
00:25:13.000 but she was just saying stuff, like, so sexy to him. 0.99
00:25:15.000 Patrice was so, I mean, he didn't do anything with her, but I remember her saying, he was like, he was, I might just have to wrestle this big bitch. 1.00
00:25:21.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:25:24.000 I was with a jiu-jitsu girl once.
00:25:26.000 That was very intimidating.
00:25:27.000 Yeah, but she's a regular-sized gal. 1.00
00:25:30.000 She's an actual... 1.00
00:25:31.000 No, this other one I don't know if you know about.
00:25:32.000 Oh, is it a different one?
00:25:33.000 Yeah, I've been with three jiu-jitsu chicks before, and one was definitely bigger than the other ones. 1.00
00:25:39.000 And she just had one of those big bodies, and I remember her vagina was very clean and no hair, but yet it had that explosion of pussy lip, like brown pussy lip. 1.00
00:25:49.000 It was like a meaty vagina, and it was weird. 1.00
00:25:52.000 It was a weird... 1.00
00:25:55.000 I've never even fucked a chick with abs, I don't think, ever. 0.96
00:25:57.000 I had one gal that was a bodybuilder when I was, like, really young. 0.97
00:26:01.000 I think I was 21. And I dated this gal from New Hampshire who had a six-pack. 0.83
00:26:06.000 It was weird.
00:26:08.000 Yeah, she had a great body, though. 1.00
00:26:09.000 Her legs were incredible. 0.95
00:26:10.000 I mean, those bodies in dresses look great sometimes.
00:26:14.000 Not abs like bodybuilder abs, but just like a girl who's toned abs.
00:26:18.000 A girl who's strong, but looks like a girl.
00:26:20.000 There's a difference between a girl strong and looks like a girl, or a gal like, no offense, the lady in those photographs was most likely on some male hormones. 1.00
00:26:28.000 I mean, get the fuck out of here. 0.99
00:26:29.000 That's Vitor Belfort in Brazil. 0.99
00:26:31.000 I mean, look at the size of that chick. 1.00
00:26:33.000 She looks like Mark Coleman when he won the heavyweight title. 0.99
00:26:35.000 She's fucking huge. 0.99
00:26:36.000 But that male hormone is why their faces look. 1.00
00:26:38.000 That wasn't the face she was destined to No, she has a man's face now.
00:26:42.000 She's very manly.
00:26:43.000 I mean like monster-like.
00:26:44.000 It's really weird touching a girl also when it's hard as a rock and not like soft and squishy.
00:26:51.000 But I mean, okay, here's the question.
00:26:53.000 Is that better or worse than someone who eats themselves into a gelatinous wall of meat?
00:27:00.000 I would take fat over that.
00:27:01.000 Really?
00:27:02.000 Like for a gal, for your lady friend? 1.00
00:27:04.000 Fat chicks are awesome, yeah. 1.00
00:27:06.000 I'd hook up with a...
00:27:09.000 I mean, once for the store, I'd go that direction.
00:27:11.000 For life.
00:27:12.000 So you think, like, if you could get her off the sauce, she could probably woman up a little bit, right?
00:27:18.000 They do.
00:27:19.000 How much would she woman up?
00:27:20.000 But she would still retain a bunch of it.
00:27:22.000 You know how I know?
00:27:23.000 Because there's a gal that lives in my friend's neighborhood, and I go to visit them, and she was apparently some Olympian bodybuilder back in the Diz-A, and now she's like in her 50s, and she looks like a monster. 0.99
00:27:36.000 She looks like a monster. 1.00
00:27:36.000 Really? 1.00
00:27:38.000 Just face is all...
00:27:39.000 She looks...
00:27:39.000 It's like...
00:27:40.000 And when I say monster, I don't mean, like, the worst monster.
00:27:43.000 I mean, like, eh...
00:27:46.000 It'd be kind of scary.
00:27:48.000 It's just what she did was turn herself into a semi-male, semi-female thing. 1.00
00:27:56.000 Yeah.
00:27:56.000 Like, she's changed.
00:27:58.000 Like, her appearance has changed.
00:28:00.000 And it's become...
00:28:01.000 You know, she's become more male than you're supposed to be. 0.97
00:28:04.000 Or than she was.
00:28:08.000 You can't go back either.
00:28:10.000 I saw a gal had her chin shaved down. 1.00
00:28:14.000 She was some big bodybuilder lady, powerlifter, martial artist. 1.00
00:28:19.000 She had her chin shaved down because her chin got too big. 1.00
00:28:22.000 Stop.
00:28:23.000 Chyna used to have that square face and then she changed. 0.99
00:28:23.000 Chyna did all that. 0.99
00:28:26.000 She became much more feminine.
00:28:28.000 They start opening your skin, grinding down your bones.
00:28:32.000 Arnold had that done, too.
00:28:34.000 And Arnold had developed a very large upper brow area.
00:28:38.000 And then, like, there's, like, before and after.
00:28:41.000 Like, if you look at him in Conan and you look at him...
00:28:43.000 Skull shaving?
00:28:44.000 Yeah, they shaved his skull down to something more reasonable.
00:28:47.000 That's just a rumor, though.
00:28:48.000 That's one of those rumors, like the Richard Gere gerbil one, you never really know.
00:28:52.000 Me and my buddy literally just talked about those urban myths.
00:28:57.000 The gerbil up the ass was a specific Philadelphia newscaster that used to say it about in Philly, that story, that urban legend. 1.00
00:29:04.000 And the other one was pumping a gallon of cum out of Rod Stewart. 0.99
00:29:09.000 Wait a minute, you think you know the origin, like where it started from? 0.94
00:29:13.000 That's literally what we were talking about earlier.
00:29:16.000 It's amazing how that got around so many years before the internet.
00:29:23.000 For rumors to happen now, it's simple.
00:29:26.000 One person who has any kind of ear or any kind of voice for people says something and it becomes gospel to some people.
00:29:33.000 Yeah, we've talked about it a bunch of times that that's the mother of all...
00:29:38.000 Rumors.
00:29:39.000 Like that no other rumor came close.
00:29:40.000 Because Eddie Bravo grew up in LA. I grew up in Boston.
00:29:43.000 We both heard about it at the same time.
00:29:45.000 Yeah, you lived in Columbus.
00:29:45.000 So it made its way across the entire country.
00:29:47.000 Same here, Rod Stewart.
00:29:48.000 But the Rod Stewart one was nothing compared.
00:29:50.000 The Rod Stewart one was, what?
00:29:51.000 He had his stomach pumped.
00:29:53.000 Why didn't he just throw up?
00:29:54.000 This didn't make any sense.
00:29:55.000 I had it thrown up. 0.95
00:29:56.000 I'm like, this is ridiculous. 0.99
00:29:57.000 How much cum did he drink? 1.00
00:29:58.000 Come on. 0.99
00:29:59.000 It's a silly thing about it. 0.99
00:30:00.000 That's ridiculous. 1.00
00:30:01.000 Just puke. 1.00
00:30:02.000 Why do you have to go to the hospital? 0.99
00:30:03.000 How much cum could it have possibly been? 0.99
00:30:05.000 Are you going to go to the hospital and tell them you drank cum? 0.99
00:30:07.000 Why? 0.97
00:30:07.000 Are they going to test it? 0.97
00:30:08.000 How the fuck do they know what it is? 1.00
00:30:09.000 You have to tell them it's cum. 1.00
00:30:10.000 What is it? 0.99
00:30:11.000 I don't know. 0.99
00:30:11.000 It's fucking milk or glue or something? 0.99
00:30:13.000 There's so much that has to come out. 1.00
00:30:15.000 He's blowing Peter North.
00:30:16.000 Can you imagine going to the hospital and just...
00:30:19.000 First of all, I thought about how much I came at the time.
00:30:22.000 I was a young, young boy.
00:30:23.000 I was probably like...
00:30:25.000 12 when that rumor came out, I was thinking about how much I can come.
00:30:28.000 I'm like, how much more could a grown adult possibly come?
00:30:32.000 It doesn't even make any sense.
00:30:33.000 Like, how much could be in my body?
00:30:35.000 Like, is he going to baby bird come?
00:30:37.000 Like, that's how much come?
00:30:39.000 He just has a gallon?
00:30:40.000 I'm taking that back because, you know, now that I think about it, I think this came out when I was 12, so I probably had never come yet.
00:30:47.000 Just that weird little shiver?
00:30:49.000 I probably really didn't even know what the actual volume would be, so that doesn't make any sense.
00:30:55.000 They said it was like quarts or gallons or something like that.
00:30:59.000 But at 12, you knew what cum was.
00:31:00.000 You just knew it wasn't happening to you.
00:31:02.000 You can't really find it back then either.
00:31:04.000 When did Pretty Woman come out? 1.00
00:31:05.000 That was way later.
00:31:07.000 That was way later.
00:31:07.000 Didn't it come out after that?
00:31:09.000 That's why we all knew who Richard Gere was?
00:31:12.000 No, everybody knew who he was before that.
00:31:14.000 He's from American Gigolo.
00:31:15.000 Yeah, American Gigolo.
00:31:16.000 He was in a lot of big movies, dude.
00:31:18.000 It seemed like it came out around Pretty Woman.
00:31:20.000 He probably just came up again, because that was the next big, big, big hit he did.
00:31:24.000 It's just amazing that it made it all the way across the country like that.
00:31:27.000 Yeah, no, absolutely.
00:31:28.000 The word was that he had left Scientology.
00:31:30.000 And that Scientology, where did I get this word?
00:31:33.000 I have no idea.
00:31:34.000 It's the most poorly researched word ever.
00:31:37.000 But this is what I heard. 0.99
00:31:38.000 Is that he left Scientology and someone in Scientology said, yeah, we'll fix that fucker. 1.00
00:31:43.000 And they put out some crazy rumor that homeboy had a gerbil up his ass. 1.00
00:31:46.000 I believe that. 0.99
00:31:47.000 Have you been following the whole HBO show?
00:31:49.000 Oh yeah, The Going Clear?
00:31:50.000 Yeah.
00:31:51.000 That's scary.
00:31:52.000 There's only the one documentary, right?
00:31:54.000 But now they're making a documentary about that guy that made the movie, Scientology is.
00:31:59.000 They're also making a documentary about Louis Theroux.
00:32:02.000 Louis Theroux, the documentarian from England, he's doing a special on Scientology.
00:32:08.000 So Scientology decided to do a documentary on him. 0.99
00:32:10.000 That's fucked up. 0.99
00:32:12.000 Dude. 0.99
00:32:13.000 Unless it was really good and you're like, geez, thanks a lot, Scientology.
00:32:16.000 Maybe you guys are pretty cool.
00:32:17.000 That's a cool documentary.
00:32:18.000 I don't think it's going to be.
00:32:20.000 It's just really well done, and everything's great.
00:32:24.000 Yeah, it's all about roses, and I think it's a hit piece.
00:32:26.000 You know, I think that's what they're doing.
00:32:27.000 They're trying to intimidate people from paying attention to them.
00:32:30.000 You know, I just watched this morning, I woke up on Netflix, and I was watching a documentary called Tricked, about how guys pimp girls, how they get girls, like young girls, and pimp them out, and the stuff they say didn't convince them, and the girls giving their account of what You know, 0.99
00:32:46.000 like, what the guy said to them and how they were like, you know, hey, I got invited to a party, and then there was no one at the party, and he goes, well, let's go have some dinner, and then, like, you know, two hours later, it was like, suck this guy's dick in a car. 0.98
00:32:56.000 It's the same when you hear these, like, adults who are out of Scientology talking about, and one guy was actually laughing a lot in the documentary, saying, like, I know it sounds so stupid telling it to you, that they were like, you know, if you don't sit in this room for the next three months, you know, you're all going to hell, and your, 0.99
00:33:11.000 you know, your inner aliens are going to fuck you up or something. 0.99
00:33:14.000 The Titans. 1.00
00:33:18.000 I don't know how someone could talk you into that stupid shit. 1.00
00:33:22.000 The pimp mentality, I guess I'm not that convincing of a speaker to even think that I could do some shit like that. 1.00
00:33:28.000 I think you're not a loser. 0.99
00:33:30.000 And I think there's a lot of people out there. 0.98
00:33:32.000 I'm not saying that everyone who's a prostitute or a Scientologist is a loser. 0.98
00:33:37.000 But let's be honest. 1.00
00:33:40.000 Losers. 1.00
00:33:40.000 That's a quote. 1.00
00:33:41.000 The percentage is not so much in your favor.
00:33:43.000 But the point being, it's like, if you're down and out, and everybody's been down and out, there's certain people that get a different level of down and out than you've ever been, or I, or you.
00:33:53.000 That's the reality of it.
00:33:55.000 It's not necessarily that it's their fault.
00:33:56.000 It's just, there's levels of down and out. 0.98
00:33:58.000 And some people, your life is shit-free. 0.99
00:34:02.000 From the moment you're born, you're born into a terrible environment. 1.00
00:34:05.000 Your parents are fucked up. 1.00
00:34:06.000 Your family life is fucked up. 1.00
00:34:08.000 There's all sorts of abuse. 1.00
00:34:09.000 There's sexual abuse.
00:34:10.000 There's violence.
00:34:11.000 There's chaos.
00:34:12.000 There's crime.
00:34:13.000 There's starvation.
00:34:14.000 You never know where your food's coming from.
00:34:16.000 And then all of a sudden, some dude comes along and he's giving you love.
00:34:18.000 And that is reality.
00:34:20.000 It's not pretty and people don't like it.
00:34:22.000 But there's levels. 0.99
00:34:23.000 There's levels of fucked up. 0.99
00:34:25.000 You're talking about Scientology right now. 0.99
00:34:26.000 I'm talking about all of it. 1.00
00:34:28.000 Scientology and prostitution and Moonies and, you know, fill in the blank, Mormon, whatever the fuck you want to join. 0.99
00:34:35.000 Well, that's how anything extreme recruits. 0.99
00:34:36.000 Even like, you know, if you get away from your religious religion, like white supremacists recruit that way.
00:34:41.000 Sure.
00:34:41.000 I mean, those documentaries on HBO used to be my favorite.
00:34:44.000 Pimps up, hose down. 0.80
00:34:45.000 No, no, I mean, Skinheads USA, did you ever see that one?
00:34:48.000 That's the one where the guy, like, you know, their leader, he's like, and, you know, I leave him alone here, I trust him during the day when I go work at the tire shop.
00:34:56.000 You know what I mean?
00:34:56.000 He works on, like, a used tire farm or something.
00:34:59.000 Did you see what happened yesterday in Texas?
00:35:01.000 No.
00:35:01.000 They had a Draw Muhammad contest, or a Draw Muhammad art exhibit, so some guys came and started shooting at them, and they killed these two guys that were shooting at this Draw Muhammad exhibit.
00:35:15.000 Wow.
00:35:15.000 Yeah.
00:35:17.000 Shooting at people in Texas is like, I mean, seriously, that's like jumping in the water and trying to bite a shark. 1.00
00:35:23.000 It might be one of the dumbest fucking things you can do. 1.00
00:35:26.000 Everyone around you, yeah. 1.00
00:35:27.000 Everyone in Texas is armed to the tits. 0.99
00:35:29.000 You can't just be shooting people in Texas, especially at a Draw Muhammad exhibit. 0.95
00:35:34.000 They should just draw Muhammad exhibits and then just have guys with police surround it and just wait for somebody to come. 0.99
00:35:41.000 That's like a honeypot.
00:35:42.000 That's like a trap. 1.00
00:35:44.000 That is a good way to shoot really radical extremists. 0.99
00:35:47.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:35:47.000 But the idea that they think that they can shoot you, because I see this argued on Twitter all the fucking time. 1.00
00:35:52.000 They should have been provoking them. 0.99
00:35:53.000 If all they have to do to provoke you is draw a picture of a guy... 1.00
00:36:00.000 What the fuck? 0.99
00:36:02.000 How could anybody ever form that argument by saying, oh, maybe they shouldn't be provoking them. 1.00
00:36:09.000 They knew what they were doing.
00:36:10.000 They're doing that to incite violence. 0.93
00:36:12.000 No, they're drawing!
00:36:14.000 That's it!
00:36:15.000 That's all it is!
00:36:16.000 There's something designed to piss off there.
00:36:17.000 I just don't think you don't...
00:36:19.000 To get to the point where they want to kill you, there's nothing. 1.00
00:36:22.000 Your mother could be sucking a gorilla's dick. 1.00
00:36:24.000 It's not good enough. 1.00
00:36:25.000 Your mother should be jerking off King Kong while Godzilla fucks her mouth. 1.00
00:36:30.000 No, it's not enough. 1.00
00:36:31.000 You can draw that. 0.93
00:36:32.000 No one's going to want to kill you.
00:36:33.000 But I believe in the thing that's like, yeah, draw Muhammad. 0.99
00:36:36.000 Who cares?
00:36:36.000 But I think you shouldn't be...
00:36:37.000 We've already been over the shock that people will murder for this, so it's kind of like when that happens...
00:36:44.000 It doesn't blow you away as much.
00:36:46.000 I mean, if you hear about cops being in things where they killed a black kid, are you blown away anymore?
00:36:51.000 We're desensitized to that story almost at this point.
00:36:54.000 Yeah, well, I guess we are, to a certain extent.
00:36:58.000 We're not as surprised.
00:37:00.000 It's still outrageous to people, but we're not as surprised.
00:37:04.000 You know, just the idea that it's somehow or another excusable in any way, shape, or form, that you would think about that. 0.88
00:37:11.000 You think about, yeah, what they did is definitely ridiculous. 0.97
00:37:13.000 If you don't want violence, it's definitely ridiculous. 0.99
00:37:16.000 But if that's all it takes to incite violence, how the fuck do you end that cycle? 0.99
00:37:20.000 You're just gonna keep perpetuating that to the end of time? 0.77
00:37:22.000 Is it perfect?
00:37:23.000 It never needs any evolution? 0.83
00:37:25.000 The idea at all that somehow or another it's offensive to draw someone is so fucking ridiculous in 2015 that anybody that defends in any way, shape, or form, even like peripherally, you're way off.
00:37:38.000 If you talk to Dave Attell, he'll tell you that the whole world's like more nervous than ever. 0.88
00:37:43.000 You know what I mean?
00:37:43.000 Like people are more offended than ever.
00:37:44.000 Oh, they are.
00:37:45.000 They are more offended than ever.
00:37:46.000 It's a weird time for comedy. 0.99
00:37:48.000 You know, there's a lot of shit that you're not supposed to make. 0.98
00:37:50.000 Like, people are actually saying... 0.99
00:37:52.000 Someone made a mild joke about Bruce Jenner.
00:37:54.000 And people were saying, you know, hey man, it's not cool to make fun of him.
00:37:57.000 Oh, it's not?
00:37:58.000 That Jamie Foxx thing was so, like...
00:38:01.000 Benign.
00:38:01.000 It was so benign.
00:38:02.000 And then Bill Maher had one too, and everybody was upset at it.
00:38:05.000 Listen, you know, whatever's wrong with him, whatever's wrong with Bruce Jenner, to say that you can't make fun of that, like, well then everything funny is off base.
00:38:14.000 You got a guy who is an Olympic gold medalist who's now become a woman, and he still wants to be a he, so he still wants you to refer to him as Bruce until he decides to change that.
00:38:24.000 He's shooting his lips up, he's taking hormones. 0.72
00:38:26.000 There's no humor in that?
00:38:27.000 Really?
00:38:28.000 Really?
00:38:28.000 That's perfect?
00:38:29.000 That's beautiful and peaceful? 0.99
00:38:30.000 Technically, it's not too soon, either, because he's been wearing panties since, like, fucking 85 or something, he said. 0.98
00:38:35.000 And he's been taking hormones for, like, two years, right? 0.97
00:38:37.000 But he took hormones back, like, in the late 80s, also.
00:38:40.000 He did?
00:38:41.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:38:41.000 In that interview, he says that.
00:38:43.000 This is the second time he's ever done that.
00:38:45.000 Oh, so he took the hormones and then got off of them?
00:38:47.000 And he had electrolysis take off all the hair on his face when he was way younger, too.
00:38:51.000 He was just super beautiful.
00:38:52.000 So, yeah, yeah.
00:38:53.000 So he went through all this stuff, like, way, way, way younger.
00:38:56.000 So, yeah, so, it's not even too, like, this is things that, I mean, people have been making jokes about him without confirmation from him for years, even on that Kardashian show.
00:39:06.000 I mean, making the same exact joke.
00:39:07.000 People are actually getting like, like, look at this prophecy when, you know, I don't, just to throw a name out there, it was like, you know, like, Dave Chappelle made a joke three years ago about this.
00:39:15.000 Like, yeah, he's looked like a woman for the past... 0.99
00:39:18.000 Fucking ten years. 0.99
00:39:19.000 Yeah, someone made a joke about it. 0.99
00:39:20.000 There was a joke on Saturday Night Live or something in the 90s.
00:39:23.000 Yeah.
00:39:24.000 Yeah, about, like, it was a woman from behind and it's Bruce Jenner.
00:39:28.000 Or the opposite, thinking it was Bruce Jenner and it's a woman.
00:39:31.000 One of those.
00:39:32.000 You didn't watch the interview at all?
00:39:34.000 I watched very little of it.
00:39:36.000 There were some really great parts to it. 0.99
00:39:38.000 I had a fucking point. 0.94
00:39:38.000 I can't remember it now. 0.94
00:39:39.000 Did you tear up?
00:39:39.000 Oh, this is the point.
00:39:40.000 No, I didn't tear up. 0.93
00:39:41.000 I thought the whole thing was ridiculous and hilarious. 0.85
00:39:43.000 You're not supposed to make fun.
00:39:45.000 Because you're supposed to be open-minded and you're supposed to be supportive and kind to someone who's obviously transitioning through a very rough and difficult thing.
00:39:55.000 That's all well and good.
00:39:57.000 And I'm with that.
00:39:58.000 I get that.
00:39:59.000 But if you're not homophobic or transphobic or any of that, you really don't have any problem with anybody doing anything they want to.
00:40:06.000 Do whatever you want to.
00:40:07.000 I'll totally accept it.
00:40:08.000 I have zero problem with it at all.
00:40:09.000 But to tell me it's not funny... 0.99
00:40:12.000 Like, please get the fuck out of here. 1.00
00:40:14.000 You got a guy who's becoming a woman... 1.00
00:40:15.000 Like, there's a guy who's 6'6", who's playing college women's basketball.
00:40:19.000 He's 50. Okay?
00:40:21.000 He was a man most of his life, had children, just decided at one point in time that he wanted to be a woman, and then found out that because he's now a new sex, he can re-enter college sports. 0.99
00:40:31.000 So he played college basketball as a fucking man back in the day, and now he's playing college basketball as a girl. 0.99
00:40:37.000 But he's 50, and he's a giant. 1.00
00:40:40.000 Full sex change? 0.96
00:40:41.000 Full sex change.
00:40:42.000 So he's moving around, and there's people that are freaking out about it, and there's people that are saying you shouldn't make fun of it, and you should just let it be.
00:40:48.000 Like, look...
00:40:50.000 To say this is not controversial is crazy.
00:40:54.000 You're a crazy person to say there's not some controversy in a 6'6", 50-year-old man playing college sports with girls.
00:41:02.000 I mean, what? 0.99
00:41:03.000 Okay, now he's a woman, so we have to call him a woman now. 0.99
00:41:06.000 Okay, but can we just concede that he was a man for 40 fucking years and has a man's frame and is enormous? 0.99
00:41:14.000 Can't we concede that being 50 is probably a little old to be playing basketball against teenagers? 0.99
00:41:19.000 No, because you got to protect people's feelings who write letters and shit. 0.98
00:41:22.000 Yeah, I mean look at the size of him. 0.96
00:41:24.000 The whole thing is like...
00:41:26.000 Her.
00:41:26.000 Excuse me.
00:41:27.000 She's a girl.
00:41:28.000 Even with the Bruce Jenner thing, what I found so interesting is...
00:41:30.000 Is that...
00:41:32.000 I feel like by what people would say, I'd be judged in my life as like transphobic, whatever that word means.
00:41:39.000 Yet, I have no problem.
00:41:40.000 I think you should be able to do whatever you want to do. 1.00
00:41:42.000 If you want to cut your dick off to get a pussy made by a doctor, get your dick cut off. 1.00
00:41:47.000 But... 1.00
00:41:48.000 I don't think I should be judged because I think that's bonkers.
00:41:51.000 You know what I mean?
00:41:52.000 Like, if you want to do it, do it.
00:41:53.000 I don't care.
00:41:53.000 I'm not afraid of being...
00:41:54.000 I wouldn't not shake somebody's hand because they were transgender. 1.00
00:41:57.000 I don't care.
00:41:58.000 But it's like... 0.99
00:41:58.000 I still think it's like a fucking... 0.99
00:41:59.000 I think it's a decision that you probably should have been talked out of by somebody. 0.99
00:42:03.000 Well, maybe and maybe not.
00:42:04.000 I'm not talking about you dressing like a woman or being gay or feeling this thing, but...
00:42:11.000 I've made an argument many times, and I've gotten many arguments about this because people just, like, jump the gun on the words, but with gay, I'm, you know, my friend with me is gay here.
00:42:22.000 I have tons of gay friends.
00:42:23.000 I have no weirdness with gay people at all.
00:42:26.000 But...
00:42:27.000 I think it's like a deviation.
00:42:29.000 It's like something that went kind of wrong, almost like, you know, to the extent of like webbed fingers or something.
00:42:34.000 But there shouldn't be anything wrong with it, and people should be able to do whatever they want to do. 0.99
00:42:36.000 Who gives a shit? 0.97
00:42:37.000 Do you know what I'm saying at all? 1.00
00:42:38.000 But if you're going to start marring your body to do something where it's like, even when it's done, like, no one's really happy from the stuff I've read and watched at least with like their new pussy. 0.99
00:42:51.000 I don't know. 1.00
00:42:52.000 You could say that.
00:42:53.000 You have to check a lot of dudes.
00:42:55.000 You're absolutely right.
00:42:56.000 A lot of gals. 1.00
00:42:57.000 How do you feel about your new pussy? 1.00
00:42:58.000 I said the stuff that I've seen and read. 1.00
00:43:01.000 There's two things.
00:43:01.000 One, the idea that they're all the same.
00:43:05.000 There's levels of everything. 1.00
00:43:07.000 You know, and there's certain people that want to be transgender and they still want to keep their dick. 0.99
00:43:11.000 You know, which is fine too. 1.00
00:43:12.000 Sure.
00:43:13.000 I think there's some people that have mental illness and there's some people that really do feel like they were born in the wrong body.
00:43:18.000 I agree with you.
00:43:19.000 There's nothing...
00:43:20.000 I mean, why would I... I think...
00:43:21.000 Because you think it's like a misfit?
00:43:22.000 This is what I think.
00:43:23.000 It's very rare that you can cure something mental with surgery.
00:43:27.000 It's very rare that there's something that doesn't feel right to you, which I guess is a mental thing, or how you view yourself, and you can fix that with surgery.
00:43:38.000 That gets real strange.
00:43:40.000 That gets real strange, as far as just accepting who you are and what you are and what...
00:43:46.000 I would never want to be the person to tell someone what to do.
00:43:50.000 Like you and I, we're both covered in tattoos.
00:43:52.000 What if someone came along and told us we couldn't do that?
00:43:54.000 I love tattoos.
00:43:55.000 I think they look badass.
00:43:56.000 You can't use the Apple Watch now, Joe.
00:43:58.000 Yeah, I heard.
00:43:59.000 I heard. 1.00
00:44:00.000 But it's like, I don't give a fuck, man. 1.00
00:44:02.000 Do whatever you want to do. 1.00
00:44:03.000 I don't have any problem with it.
00:44:04.000 But I don't know what... 0.79
00:44:07.000 I don't know what you're feeling so for me to even comment on it in any way is kind of Kind of ridiculous for me to assume like I know what's going on whether I know you're crazy or whether I know that you were actually really born a woman or whether you know fill in the blank a Variety of reasons to decide you're in the wrong gender. 0.97
00:44:24.000 You might get bored being a dude You might have a bunch of women around you that you like more than you like men and you wish you were one of them I know a dude who was for the longest time was telling my wife he's gay. 0.96
00:44:33.000 No, he's not gay. 0.82
00:44:34.000 He's not gay. 0.63
00:44:35.000 He's not gay Boom! 1.00
00:44:35.000 He comes out, he's like 46. This poor bastard wasted his whole fucking life pretending that he wasn't gay. 1.00
00:44:40.000 I'm like, this dude is gay! 1.00
00:44:42.000 But he was always around these women. 0.99
00:44:42.000 I'm telling you he's gay! 0.99
00:44:44.000 He would hang around them and talk with them and be one of them. 0.90
00:44:47.000 It's like there was the energy in the room.
00:44:49.000 There's an energy in the room if there's a dude and maybe his girlfriend or a bunch of their friends.
00:44:54.000 There's an energy like, well, there's guys here and he's not gonna talk like us.
00:44:57.000 But this dude was in the mix.
00:44:59.000 He was in the mix with them about everything.
00:45:02.000 Have you seen the new bag?
00:45:04.000 And stuff that girls do, you know, he would move like them, man. 0.95
00:45:07.000 And if you had gotten a hold of that dude and talked him into it, he probably would have become a woman. 1.00
00:45:12.000 Really?
00:45:13.000 I think he could have been, if you hypnotized him.
00:45:16.000 He could have made him become a woman. 0.99
00:45:17.000 But gay, man, see, that's a weird one. 1.00
00:45:20.000 I think, first of all, definitely born that way. 0.97
00:45:23.000 I agree.
00:45:23.000 Definitely.
00:45:24.000 But I don't necessarily think it's like a...
00:45:25.000 I don't think it's a bad thing.
00:45:27.000 They seem to be enjoying it.
00:45:28.000 I think the only way it would be bad is if there wasn't enough people to reproduce.
00:45:32.000 I think it's just a deviation.
00:45:33.000 I think it's a deviation.
00:45:34.000 Like some people are tall.
00:45:35.000 That's the exact word I do.
00:45:37.000 I think it's a deviation.
00:45:37.000 But I don't think it's a negative.
00:45:41.000 You know, it just doesn't seem to be negative. 1.00
00:45:43.000 The only thing that would be negative is that they don't have a correct hole to fuck. 0.99
00:45:46.000 There's this transgender webcam room on Chatterbait where you can look at transgenders doing webcam stuff. 1.00
00:45:54.000 And you just stumbled upon this.
00:45:56.000 No, I was with this girl that she's like, you gotta check this out.
00:45:59.000 And I'm like, I don't want to look at this. 0.99
00:46:00.000 She's like, I want to see a good fake vagina. 1.00
00:46:03.000 And there was this one guy that on the top looked just like Tom Segura, like a normal guy. 1.00
00:46:07.000 And on the bottom, he had a really well-done vagina. 1.00
00:46:10.000 And it was deep. 1.00
00:46:12.000 She was jealous because he had this humongous vibrator in him.
00:46:12.000 It was deep.
00:46:17.000 And I didn't know...
00:46:18.000 Listen, you are haunting...
00:46:20.000 I didn't know it was deep, though.
00:46:22.000 It's such a weird...
00:46:22.000 Throughout the world right now with that image.
00:46:25.000 Tom Segura with a giant pussy. 1.00
00:46:28.000 Like a deep pussy and a huge black rubber dong. 1.00
00:46:32.000 I thought the fake vagina wasn't a deep thing. 1.00
00:46:34.000 I thought it was just kind of outer... 1.00
00:46:36.000 It just split a dick open. 1.00
00:46:38.000 I always assumed it was as deep as long as your dick was. 1.00
00:46:40.000 They just took your dick inside out. 1.00
00:46:42.000 Almost like it was a simple just pushing the dickhead like all the way back in. 1.00
00:46:45.000 I think they do like real surgery now. 0.92
00:46:47.000 If I remember, I think they can actually construct a tube in there.
00:46:50.000 Yeah, I'm sure it's advanced.
00:46:52.000 But you know, I've interviewed...
00:46:53.000 He was creamy.
00:46:54.000 He was creamy.
00:46:55.000 Like, so what's that cream? 0.98
00:46:56.000 Is that cum? 0.90
00:46:57.000 Well, it has to be like some lube that they're using. 0.98
00:46:59.000 I mean, it has to.
00:46:59.000 No, he...
00:47:01.000 How much did you watch?
00:47:03.000 It's probably spit.
00:47:05.000 Do you know that movie, Ex Machina?
00:47:06.000 They weren't really robots, Brian.
00:47:09.000 I've seen some fake jizz before, for sure. 0.99
00:47:12.000 I've seen some fake dongs in porn. 0.99
00:47:14.000 There's this one guy, every porn he does, he keeps his pants on, and this fake dong just comes through the hole. 0.99
00:47:19.000 Oh, but they make him ridiculously huge. 0.99
00:47:20.000 You can see the strap.
00:47:21.000 It was just fake.
00:47:23.000 I'm like, who wants to see this? 1.00
00:47:24.000 This girl fucking this guy who's a liar. 1.00
00:47:27.000 He's got a big rubber fake dick. 1.00
00:47:29.000 I interviewed twice now. 1.00
00:47:32.000 The transgender chick that dated Michael Phelps was born, like, both sexes, she says, and became a woman.
00:47:41.000 She had a lot of surgery, but... 1.00
00:47:43.000 But that's not transgender, then. 0.97
00:47:44.000 That's like a decision. 1.00
00:47:47.000 She just did a porno. 1.00
00:47:48.000 She just did a porno, and she told me to look at the trailer, and I watched the trailer, and it's odd-looking, but she has a girl's body, but it's... 0.83
00:47:58.000 Is this available online?
00:47:59.000 It's available, yeah. 0.99
00:47:59.000 Can we see the vagina? 0.99
00:48:00.000 You can watch it right now. 0.99
00:48:01.000 Okay, pull it up, Jamie.
00:48:03.000 As long as it doesn't get on the Ustream.
00:48:05.000 We don't want to get Brad in trouble.
00:48:06.000 It's called Going for the Gold.
00:48:08.000 But if she was a vag... 1.00
00:48:09.000 Let me ask you this, because it's so important.
00:48:11.000 If she was born with both...
00:48:15.000 Okay, let me ask you.
00:48:16.000 If you were born with both, would you make a decision?
00:48:18.000 I think in this day and age, you'd be better off being that one dude that can do it all.
00:48:24.000 I mean, good luck replacing you.
00:48:27.000 Why not have both?
00:48:28.000 Yeah, I mean, unless you're homophobic. 0.86
00:48:30.000 They make that decision, like, I think, crazy young. 0.85
00:48:32.000 I think it's like a baby.
00:48:34.000 Sometimes I feel like a nut, sometimes I don't. 1.00
00:48:38.000 You just put your dick away like a gas pump, just into your own pussy. 1.00
00:48:43.000 Extinction cord. 1.00
00:48:44.000 Parents would have way too much power to decide which direction a kid would go in that sense.
00:48:50.000 Some people argue the same thing with circumcision. 0.99
00:48:52.000 Well, you know, people have been circumcised and their dick got cut off, so they transitioned them to girls. 0.99
00:48:59.000 Do you know that? 1.00
00:49:00.000 Yeah, they lost their dick in like a surgery mistake. 1.00
00:49:06.000 What am I going to see here? 1.00
00:49:07.000 Am I going to get to see it in this?
00:49:09.000 Huh?
00:49:10.000 They're gonna show the box here?
00:49:11.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:49:12.000 Well, she looks a lot like a gal. 1.00
00:49:13.000 Oh, so they have a swimmer come and meet her through the pool. 0.99
00:49:16.000 Bam.
00:49:17.000 How rude.
00:49:18.000 Whoa, what's that?
00:49:18.000 Her whole hand is just...
00:49:20.000 Is that a gay? 1.00
00:49:21.000 That's a man having sex with him? 1.00
00:49:22.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:49:23.000 What?
00:49:23.000 He's eating it?
00:49:24.000 Okay, so is that guy...
00:49:25.000 What's going on?
00:49:26.000 I don't know what's going on.
00:49:27.000 What is that?
00:49:28.000 What is that?
00:49:28.000 How do you...
00:49:29.000 This looks like regular sex. 0.98
00:49:29.000 Exactly. 0.98
00:49:30.000 Yeah, this totally looks like a man having sex with a girl. 1.00
00:49:33.000 That looks like a total vagina. 1.00
00:49:33.000 Hmm. 1.00
00:49:36.000 Like, if you didn't enjoy that vagina, you're just picky. 1.00
00:49:40.000 Oh, wait. 1.00
00:49:41.000 I thought this was a hermaphrodite.
00:49:42.000 Okay. 0.99
00:49:43.000 Well, we just saw a guy jerk off on a former male. 0.99
00:49:48.000 A former male female. 1.00
00:49:49.000 A former hermaphrodite.
00:49:51.000 Well, you didn't see the box there. 0.95
00:49:51.000 Trans-sexed. 0.95
00:49:53.000 They showed it.
00:49:54.000 I didn't see it.
00:49:55.000 Oh, there it is.
00:49:56.000 Where's the close-up? 0.98
00:49:57.000 It looks like a box with balls. 0.97
00:49:57.000 There it is. 0.97
00:49:57.000 Get a close-up. 0.97
00:50:01.000 There's a large, stitches area above the box hole area.
00:50:07.000 The lips are bulky. 0.95
00:50:09.000 Yeah, it looks like there's balls inside the lips. 1.00
00:50:12.000 But again, if you're trapped on a deserted island and you get mad at this, you're a picky fuck. 1.00
00:50:17.000 If I was trapped in a hotel lobby in two hours, I'd give it a whirl. 1.00
00:50:23.000 I mean, we're all, you know, we're living in a weird world where there's going to come a time, I think, if not in our lives, in our grandchildren's lives, for sure, where they're going to be able to change your sex. 0.63
00:50:34.000 Like, you're going to be able to be...
00:50:35.000 Yeah, they're just going to give you some sort of a genetic alteration.
00:50:37.000 You'll be a woman. 0.82
00:50:38.000 I don't think that's going to be outside the realm of possibility within the next 150, 200 years.
00:50:43.000 They're just so close to fixing so many different things about people, and then once they fix everything...
00:50:50.000 I mean, they're never going to fix everything.
00:50:51.000 We're always going to have some diseases and colds and flus and shit, but I think they're going to be able to do some pretty incredible shit to your body, and then they're going to get to a point where people start going, you know what? 0.93
00:50:59.000 There's a clinic in Thailand, and all you have to do is pay them $50,000, and you can become a woman, like a real woman. 0.97
00:51:07.000 And you can turn back if you don't like it.
00:51:09.000 And they'll show clients that every six years they go back, you know, I was a man for five years, but I enjoyed a lot of lovely things that when I was a girl, I'd appreciate more.
00:51:19.000 And then, you know, it's balanced my perspective, being a man for 30 years, then a woman for five, then a man again.
00:51:25.000 I just kind of get it. 0.98
00:51:26.000 Four years I just took cock left and right. 0.97
00:51:28.000 Maybe not. 0.99
00:51:29.000 Maybe just yoga.
00:51:30.000 Just live as a girl. 1.00
00:51:33.000 Just do girl shit. 1.00
00:51:34.000 Also, the other thing you're going to have to deal with is, like, you see the perfect gal, you know, you see the perfect gal walking down the street, like, just Big ass and thin waist and big titty. 1.00
00:51:41.000 It's like, Jesus Christ! 0.99
00:51:43.000 Your genes just call out, right?
00:51:45.000 Like, your DNA just goes, oh my God!
00:51:48.000 Like, if a group of guys were like this, and we're not rude, right?
00:51:51.000 We're not rude people.
00:51:52.000 But if we saw some gal, and she was outside of ear range, like if she was walking down the street, you know, you would probably be like, dude, look at this. 0.99
00:51:57.000 And you'd go, oh my God, nature's amazing!
00:52:00.000 Look at the pole.
00:52:01.000 This is like a sunset or a fantastic art exhibit.
00:52:07.000 You're watching nature's art walk down the street in the shape of a beautiful girl.
00:52:10.000 What if you could just get that?
00:52:12.000 What if you just...
00:52:13.000 You just go to a doctor and then your body straightens up and gets straighter.
00:52:18.000 If you're a big boxy type gal, your body slips down the waves. 1.00
00:52:22.000 Your ass pops out. 1.00
00:52:24.000 Your tits pop. 1.00
00:52:25.000 And then everybody looks hot as fucks. 1.00
00:52:27.000 Isn't that like sexual communism, though, to some degree? 0.99
00:52:29.000 Like, you kind of want to keep it, like...
00:52:32.000 That's a great term!
00:52:33.000 That should be a ban! 0.99
00:52:34.000 Sexual communism.
00:52:35.000 That's a great ban!
00:52:37.000 You really do want to keep...
00:52:38.000 Because don't you want to keep the elite?
00:52:40.000 Because there is something...
00:52:41.000 What I find interesting about looking at, like, chicks in that capacity at all, is that, like, there's some... 0.99
00:52:51.000 That are just fucking undeniable. 0.90
00:52:53.000 Do you know what I mean? 0.97
00:52:54.000 Yes.
00:52:54.000 Like, I'd point out girls who I thought were beautiful and my buddies, like, you know, last night was like, that's an LA 6. And I'm like, I thought she was stunning.
00:53:01.000 How about Beyonce? 1.00
00:53:02.000 If you don't think she's hot, you're gay. 1.00
00:53:04.000 You have to be gay. 1.00
00:53:05.000 If you don't look at Beyonce and go, Jesus Christ. 1.00
00:53:08.000 Like, you know that, what's that fucking song, If You Like It Then You Should Have Put A Ring On? 1.00
00:53:12.000 Yeah, she's very sexy for sure. 1.00
00:53:16.000 Look at that fucking body though. 1.00
00:53:18.000 Good lord. 1.00
00:53:19.000 There's a lot of girls that are undeniable. 1.00
00:53:21.000 It's like they're attractive and pretty.
00:53:22.000 But I'm talking about the undeniable where everyone's like...
00:53:24.000 Jennifer Lopez.
00:53:25.000 Yeah, in her prime, Jennifer Lopez. 1.00
00:53:27.000 Undeniable.
00:53:28.000 Beautiful, gorgeous. 0.98
00:53:28.000 Just get the fuck out of here. 0.98
00:53:29.000 Salma Hayek in her prime was just fucking stunning. 1.00
00:53:32.000 Undeniable! 0.97
00:53:33.000 Kate Upton for a couple of years.
00:53:33.000 Undeniable.
00:53:36.000 Undeniable.
00:53:37.000 That's it.
00:53:37.000 Yeah, it's absolutely true.
00:53:38.000 Like, there's some people, no one can even argue, like, oh, their ass is too flat, or it's too big, or it's too, you know. 0.99
00:53:44.000 Yeah, if you, you know, it's amazing. 1.00
00:53:46.000 You know, like Nicki Minaj looks, you know, some people think that's, like, ideal, and some people are like, it's retarded looking, you know, it's ridiculous. 1.00
00:53:52.000 Well... 0.92
00:53:53.000 The problem with that is, did she always look like that? 0.99
00:53:55.000 And if she didn't always look like that, how's her ass that big? 1.00
00:53:58.000 Am I looking at bags of water? 0.99
00:54:00.000 Like, what am I looking at?
00:54:01.000 I just saw her on SNL. I've seen her where her ass looks, you know, big, fat, and like good, and like the porn-esque, I guess, kind of way. 1.00
00:54:08.000 When I saw it last time, she literally looks like a battle droid. 0.99
00:54:11.000 Just like some kind of...
00:54:14.000 Just like tank bottoms, you know what I mean?
00:54:19.000 Isn't it weird in the 90s we never thought that was hot? 1.00
00:54:22.000 We were like, look at that girl's fucking fat ass. 1.00
00:54:24.000 Dude, I was just going to bring that up. 1.00
00:54:25.000 Not that it was a fat ass, but it wasn't something that everybody aspired to. 0.99
00:54:30.000 I was driving down the street the other day and there was some ad about building a better butt. 0.99
00:54:36.000 They're having classes at this gym just to build better butts. 1.00
00:54:40.000 And we're for real.
00:54:42.000 I saw that, but we're out here.
00:54:43.000 And then you see all these girls squatting in the back and like, oh Jesus Christ, like what happened? 0.96
00:54:48.000 What happened?
00:54:49.000 Like that's a major shift.
00:54:50.000 You know what it was?
00:54:51.000 Black male culture kind of dictated the fashion and style and stuff for white dudes for a long time, kind of taking over the style of that. 0.98
00:55:00.000 And now like finally the black women are now kind of setting like the tone for like the body shape. 1.00
00:55:05.000 I think it was the depression. 1.00
00:55:06.000 I think people were so poor and starving, they forgot that they liked big asses. 1.00
00:55:11.000 And then it took like a while before they woke up, and they got through the 50s and the 60s and the 70s and the 80s, and then Sir Mix-a-Lock came along, and he had that one song, and everybody was like, yeah, wait a minute. 0.96
00:55:22.000 Like, why is it so great to me?
00:55:24.000 And then you too?
00:55:25.000 Yeah!
00:55:28.000 And it's almost like somewhere in there, there's like a resurgence.
00:55:32.000 Now, it's everyone.
00:55:33.000 You talk to men, like, what's the most important thing?
00:55:36.000 You know, what's the most attractive thing to a girl? 1.00
00:55:38.000 Almost every guy says ass. 1.00
00:55:40.000 Almost every guy. 1.00
00:55:41.000 It's the Cola Wars.
00:55:42.000 Cola Wars?
00:55:43.000 I'm a face guy.
00:55:44.000 Well, of course.
00:55:45.000 I mean, face is important.
00:55:46.000 Face will do a lot for me. 0.65
00:55:47.000 Also, as a guy who couldn't be picky when I was younger, I was a fat dude.
00:55:51.000 Like, face meant a lot.
00:55:53.000 If I could go with a pretty face I could look at, and if she was big, like, you know, maybe she'll say yes. 0.99
00:55:53.000 You know what I mean? 0.99
00:55:58.000 Maybe she'll go back with me.
00:55:59.000 It really sucks, too, when you get close to a girl, and then you notice, like, the sunlight shines on her face. 1.00
00:56:04.000 You're like, oh, shit, she's got whiskers. 1.00
00:56:05.000 Or, oh, she has no chin at all. 1.00
00:56:07.000 She has, like, a weak chin.
00:56:08.000 I'm a little picky.
00:56:08.000 Yeah.
00:56:09.000 No, I'm just saying that's how important face is. 1.00
00:56:11.000 Because if it was tits or ass and the tits had this humongous brown mole on it, you'd be like, ugh. 1.00
00:56:16.000 Do you know what's weird for me, too? 1.00
00:56:17.000 If someone said tits or ass, over both of those, I'd rather see any girl's pussy. 1.00
00:56:24.000 I don't know why that means the world to me. 1.00
00:56:26.000 You're a pervert. 1.00
00:56:27.000 I guess. 1.00
00:56:28.000 You're like a meaty, right?
00:56:29.000 It's not even knowing that.
00:56:31.000 Even when she's like...
00:56:32.000 You know, hair.
00:56:34.000 Like, just the hair.
00:56:35.000 I'd be...
00:56:35.000 Do you want to see the pubes?
00:56:36.000 Just a little pubes? 1.00
00:56:36.000 Sure. 1.00
00:56:37.000 Just the mound, the pubic bone, the hump? 0.99
00:56:40.000 I remember being a teenager, and what bummed me out when girls all started shaving their pussies bald was some girl told me, she goes, I go, let me see your pubes. 1.00
00:56:48.000 And she goes, I shave my pussy bald. 1.00
00:56:50.000 And I go, really? 1.00
00:56:50.000 And then she pulled her, like, pants down to, like, the top of her... 1.00
00:56:54.000 We'll call it pussy slit, I guess? 1.00
00:56:54.000 Classy. 1.00
00:56:56.000 And, uh...
00:56:57.000 What a good kid.
00:56:57.000 Gosh.
00:56:58.000 It's amazing, though, how not...
00:57:01.000 Exciting it was to see that... 0.99
00:57:03.000 If there was pussy hair there, you'd be like, oh, I'm not supposed to see that. 1.00
00:57:05.000 But when there's nothing there... 0.99
00:57:06.000 You know what I mean?
00:57:07.000 It takes away, like... 0.99
00:57:08.000 I'm 37, so when I was a kid, all porn, everything was like pussy hair. 0.99
00:57:15.000 So maybe that's what I'm just drawn to in that way. 0.99
00:57:18.000 But I find it really takes away... 0.99
00:57:21.000 I mean, when a girl wears those bikinis where it just comes right above where their pussy starts, you don't feel like you're seeing anything that weird. 1.00
00:57:28.000 But if you... 0.99
00:57:30.000 I saw a girl laying down and some pubes were coming out the side of her bathing suit. 1.00
00:57:35.000 That's actually, you feel like you're seeing more than if you saw all the top of her pussy. 1.00
00:57:39.000 Right. 1.00
00:57:39.000 That Black Crows album. 1.00
00:57:41.000 What's that Black Crows album?
00:57:42.000 America?
00:57:42.000 America?
00:57:43.000 That was gross! 0.95
00:57:45.000 That's a great album cover.
00:57:49.000 That's a great album cover. 1.00
00:57:51.000 Black Crowes are the shit. 1.00
00:57:52.000 That big muff. 1.00
00:57:53.000 They were the shit, son! 1.00
00:57:55.000 Yeah, it's weird when you... 1.00
00:57:56.000 I kind of forgot about pussy hair, and then when you see it, you're like, you kind of miss it. 0.99
00:58:01.000 I missed it. 0.97
00:58:01.000 Well, it's weird because when we were kids, it was like kind of iconic. 0.97
00:58:05.000 It was like that represented... 0.75
00:58:07.000 Like they would call it...
00:58:09.000 Guys would call it a beaver.
00:58:10.000 You know?
00:58:11.000 Just a little bit of pubes poking out of the top. 1.00
00:58:13.000 Remember Samantha Fox in the 80s?
00:58:15.000 And then they found out that over in England, she did a bunch of naked pictures. 1.00
00:58:20.000 And like, yeah, Big Bush.
00:58:21.000 She was a page six girl. 0.99
00:58:23.000 They used to have page six of their newspaper where they would show tits. 1.00
00:58:27.000 That's why they were so much more advanced than us with their art. 1.00
00:58:30.000 That's why the Beatles and shit came from there. 0.98
00:58:32.000 They were so much more relaxed. 1.00
00:58:34.000 They would show tits in the newspaper. 1.00
00:58:37.000 Relax. 1.00
00:58:38.000 It's just tits. 1.00
00:58:39.000 Everybody's so freaked out. 0.99
00:58:40.000 And hair was more of like an eyelash for the vagina for periods and stuff, so it wouldn't get everywhere, and that's why girls are... 1.00
00:58:47.000 That's not what it is. 0.99
00:58:48.000 The butthole hair was always disturbing, though.
00:58:51.000 Yeah, I don't like that. 0.98
00:58:51.000 Nobody ever liked the butt o'er, because some gals just did not know what they were doing when it came to wiping. 0.98
00:58:56.000 And back then, nobody had a bidet, and nobody had baby wipes.
00:58:59.000 It was toilet paper, and sometimes some of it stuck around.
00:59:02.000 So you get those little, looks like joints for little G.I. Joe figures.
00:59:07.000 Joints for little G.I. Joe figures!
00:59:11.000 They're all super tightly rolled up.
00:59:13.000 Oh, that's hilarious! 1.00
00:59:16.000 Oh, a little shit joint. 1.00
00:59:17.000 Did you know those little nose trimmers that you buy? 1.00
00:59:20.000 You use that for your asshole also. 1.00
00:59:21.000 You can? 1.00
00:59:22.000 Yeah, it's super easy.
00:59:23.000 I was unaware of that.
00:59:25.000 Well, it's not rocket science.
00:59:26.000 It's not like trying to figure out solar power. 1.00
00:59:29.000 Nose hair trimmers on your asshole. 1.00
00:59:31.000 If it cuts hair, it cuts hair. 1.00
00:59:33.000 It just does.
00:59:34.000 And it doesn't cut you and stuff. 1.00
00:59:35.000 Well, couldn't you get one of those face shavers, those little nice ones down there with your asshole? 1.00
00:59:40.000 What are you talking about shaving your asshole hair? 1.00
00:59:42.000 His own asshole. 1.00
00:59:43.000 Oh, I just leave my asshole hair. 1.00
00:59:45.000 You know what, though? 1.00
00:59:46.000 You could do a way better job of cleaning it if your asshole is shaved. 1.00
00:59:50.000 But your asshole will grow that hair back like a wild bush, and then in a couple of days, you'll be just squeezing your ass cheeks everywhere you go to keep from just digging in there and just itching. 1.00
01:00:02.000 Just clawing at your asshole like a wolf trying to bury a caribou. 1.00
01:00:09.000 The stubble and ball stubble. 1.00
01:00:15.000 How come my face stubble barely bothers me?
01:00:17.000 My head stubble, like I got a lot of stubble up here right now, doesn't bother me at all. 1.00
01:00:22.000 But Jesus Christ, my asshole. 1.00
01:00:25.000 You just start moving around in your chair. 1.00
01:00:28.000 It feels good when you wipe your ass and you grab like a bundle of hair on the way out. 1.00
01:00:35.000 You know what's the best, man? 1.00
01:00:37.000 One-wipe Charlie's.
01:00:38.000 I want them so bad.
01:00:38.000 You ever try those?
01:00:39.000 Oh, they're the best.
01:00:40.000 What is that?
01:00:41.000 It's like a Badood wipe. 0.99
01:00:42.000 Like that kind of a thing.
01:00:43.000 Like a baby wipe.
01:00:45.000 They made for men, but they don't smell like flowers. 1.00
01:00:47.000 Like you just got ass-fucked by a flower floor. 0.99
01:00:49.000 I don't even use toilet paper anymore. 1.00
01:00:52.000 Yeah, well, that Japanese thing is the shit, man. 1.00
01:00:55.000 The bidet? 1.00
01:00:56.000 Yeah, you're lucky.
01:00:57.000 Yeah.
01:00:57.000 I'm going to install one in here.
01:00:59.000 Yeah, I'm going to install one in here eventually.
01:01:01.000 Does it shoot like high-pressure water? 1.00
01:01:03.000 Come over into shit, hang out for an hour. 1.00
01:01:06.000 Is it high-pressure water? 1.00
01:01:07.000 High-pressure water, warm air. 1.00
01:01:09.000 It dries your asshole off. 1.00
01:01:11.000 There's two different speeds to the water it shoots in your asshole. 1.00
01:01:14.000 Totos. 1.00
01:01:15.000 It also cleans your vagina if you're a gal. 1.00
01:01:15.000 Woo! 1.00
01:01:18.000 It cleans your vag area. 0.98
01:01:19.000 You can back your vag up, get a little tingly, tingly, and if, you know, you guys have a little time on your... 0.98
01:01:24.000 If I was a gal... 1.00
01:01:29.000 When we went to Japan, I just sat there, seriously, for a half hour with the one shooting in my asshole, because it just felt so good. 1.00
01:01:35.000 Because it hit, like, the back wall of your butthole. 1.00
01:01:37.000 That's how long I'd have to do it to feel like I was, like, getting... 0.99
01:01:41.000 I still feel like I have to do paper afterwards.
01:01:43.000 No.
01:01:43.000 No?
01:01:44.000 You didn't even walk out like worried.
01:01:46.000 It was so clean. 1.00
01:01:47.000 It was like taking a shower for your butthole. 1.00
01:01:49.000 I'm pretty meticulous. 0.99
01:01:51.000 You're not doing as good a job.
01:01:53.000 I'm telling you.
01:01:53.000 You're just smearing.
01:01:54.000 Even if you're using baby wipes, you're just smearing shit over your hair. 0.99
01:01:58.000 Okay, imagine if I took some shit and I just rubbed it in the top of your hair. 0.99
01:02:02.000 You're like, I'm good. 0.99
01:02:03.000 I got a baby wipe. 0.99
01:02:04.000 Get the fuck out of here. 1.00
01:02:07.000 You would never accept that. 1.00
01:02:08.000 You would get in the shower and you would clean your asshole hair. 1.00
01:02:11.000 Fair enough. 1.00
01:02:13.000 But if you told me I had 70 baby wipes and a roll of toilet paper, I'd take a shot there and get it out.
01:02:19.000 Or a shower.
01:02:20.000 Yeah.
01:02:21.000 Jesus Christ.
01:02:22.000 Oh no, if there's a choice. 1.00
01:02:23.000 Hey, you've been dipping this fork in shit all day. 0.99
01:02:26.000 Dude, don't worry about it. 0.99
01:02:28.000 I rubbed it with 70 baby wipes.
01:02:30.000 I'd be like, oh!
01:02:31.000 That's not enough. 1.00
01:02:32.000 You gotta wash this fucking thing. 0.99
01:02:34.000 You gotta get it in the washing machine in these hot water and suds. 1.00
01:02:38.000 But again, let's say baby wipes and toilet paper.
01:02:42.000 Just trying to get my method approved.
01:02:44.000 But still, you would pick shower before that works.
01:02:46.000 Of course, shower is the best.
01:02:48.000 But I also, in fairness, yeah, I mean, I don't, like, do anything. 0.99
01:02:51.000 I don't go, like, out for the day, though, until I shower after I shit. 0.97
01:02:54.000 Do you stand up to wipe or sit down? 0.98
01:02:57.000 Stand up is sitting on even a possibility. 1.00
01:03:00.000 Who the fuck wipes their ass sitting down? 1.00
01:03:01.000 You must have really shitty cuffs. 1.00
01:03:02.000 I know. 0.98
01:03:03.000 What are your cuffs?
01:03:04.000 No, I don't do it.
01:03:04.000 He does.
01:03:05.000 I wanted you to do it.
01:03:06.000 I stand up.
01:03:07.000 Find a target.
01:03:07.000 No, I stand up.
01:03:08.000 I stand up.
01:03:08.000 Jamie, do you stand up or sit down?
01:03:10.000 Yeah, everybody stands up.
01:03:10.000 No, there's people.
01:03:11.000 Most people sit and they just go like...
01:03:13.000 Smell their sleeves.
01:03:16.000 Smell their watch.
01:03:17.000 Guaranteed them watch. 1.00
01:03:18.000 I was like, shit. 1.00
01:03:20.000 One more time. 1.00
01:03:22.000 One of my buddies told me he goes from the front, he reaches between his legs and does it while he sits down.
01:03:22.000 Poupatron?
01:03:26.000 That's great. 1.00
01:03:27.000 Smell his balls. 1.00
01:03:28.000 Oh, yeah. 1.00
01:03:28.000 How do you do that? 1.00
01:03:29.000 Jesus Christ, you don't. 1.00
01:03:30.000 He's an asshole. 1.00
01:03:31.000 You're not supposed to. 1.00
01:03:32.000 God damn. 0.99
01:03:34.000 It's a very specific protocol. 0.99
01:03:36.000 Imagine what people smelled like when they hadn't figured out wiping, and then someone finally figured out how to just kind of clean the area off a little bit, and everybody's like, oh, yeah, why would you just be covered with shit all the time?
01:03:47.000 When I used to do this poll on, when it had redband.com, I did this poll, and I did who stands up, who sits down, and it was like almost 50-50.
01:03:55.000 You don't have redband.com anymore?
01:03:56.000 Oh, I do.
01:03:56.000 It's just forwards now.
01:03:58.000 Oh, oh.
01:03:59.000 But yeah, it was 50-50.
01:04:00.000 Like, I know all these people. 1.00
01:04:02.000 It's like the dress, the stupid dress. 1.00
01:04:04.000 Take into account, it's 50% of the people that were going to your website. 1.00
01:04:08.000 Yeah, it was only like 100 people.
01:04:11.000 It's a small double test.
01:04:13.000 Sit and wipe is weird.
01:04:15.000 Yeah, it's very weird.
01:04:15.000 You're not going to do a good job.
01:04:17.000 Ari sits and wipes. 1.00
01:04:18.000 And you can see it in the Jew clam. 0.99
01:04:20.000 That's right.
01:04:21.000 It's documented.
01:04:22.000 Well, he should...
01:04:23.000 If ever there was a... 0.99
01:04:27.000 Like a billboard for Stand Up and Wipe Your Ass. 1.00
01:04:30.000 The guy who's singing and wiping his ass. 1.00
01:04:32.000 Something's wrong with his ass. 1.00
01:04:33.000 Well, especially that one. 1.00
01:04:34.000 That video was so ridiculous. 1.00
01:04:36.000 Ari had like a Homer Simpson's mouth asshole. 1.00
01:04:39.000 I watched it the other day. 1.00
01:04:41.000 It's still on LiveLeak, the uncensored version.
01:04:45.000 Everyone watched it.
01:04:47.000 Well, we had a whole episode of... 1.00
01:04:49.000 My podcast, Legion of Skanks, that I do, and one of our buddies said that he had a hemorrhoid, and he showed everyone his asshole, and then Ari said that he was like, to hold his asshole against Lewis's, 1.00
01:05:06.000 and I mean, Ari's asshole blew everyone up. 1.00
01:05:10.000 I told him I was worried about how something's wrong. 1.00
01:05:15.000 Months?
01:05:16.000 So it's still like that?
01:05:17.000 Oh, yeah, no, it's still like that.
01:05:18.000 Oh, yeah, that's not going away, man.
01:05:20.000 What?
01:05:20.000 Ari's going to have flare-ups like that.
01:05:22.000 The Jew clam's still alive. 1.00
01:05:23.000 He never killed the Jew clam. 0.99
01:05:24.000 So, really? 0.99
01:05:25.000 And he still has the Skittle balls. 1.00
01:05:27.000 Like, I swear to God, if someone's going to butt-fuck Ari, I feel like you could pull Ari's asshole up their dick like a sock. 1.00
01:05:33.000 Well, he's in... 1.00
01:05:34.000 He's in Thailand right now. 1.00
01:05:35.000 He's probably getting his ass pulled up. 0.99
01:05:38.000 What a convenient place to test that theory. 0.99
01:05:40.000 Brody Stevens special, please. 0.98
01:05:42.000 Oh my god, that's so ridiculous. 0.98
01:05:46.000 Oh my god. 1.00
01:05:47.000 Why?
01:05:48.000 What's wrong with that poor boy?
01:05:50.000 Aggressive wiping.
01:05:51.000 Dry wiping, I guess.
01:05:52.000 Aggressive dry wiping?
01:05:53.000 I mean, I couldn't picture what else would make that happen. 0.98
01:05:56.000 We're all ass doctors all of a sudden. 0.81
01:05:59.000 I remember the night that happened, I sent Duncan Trussell a screenshot, and he calls me back and goes, Hey man, what the hell is that? 0.99
01:06:10.000 That's a sock.
01:06:12.000 That's a pink sock.
01:06:13.000 I didn't even know what a pink sock was.
01:06:15.000 But that's what it looked like.
01:06:16.000 It looked like it got turned out.
01:06:18.000 Yeah.
01:06:19.000 He's got prolapse.
01:06:21.000 It's not good.
01:06:22.000 Oh, God.
01:06:25.000 Jesus Christ. 0.89
01:06:26.000 And it's Skittle balls. 0.99
01:06:27.000 I can't believe we were at the Comedy and Magic Club and we're like, alright, Ari, show us your butthole. 1.00
01:06:33.000 Alright, now show us your balls. 1.00
01:06:34.000 And his balls had all those little balls in it. 1.00
01:06:37.000 Those little tiny Skittles. 0.99
01:06:38.000 Remember that?
01:06:39.000 Jesus.
01:06:40.000 No, that was at the Comedy and Magic Club?
01:06:41.000 I don't remember that at all. 1.00
01:06:44.000 You make Ari do stunts like a fucking autistic kid? 1.00
01:06:47.000 Show us your butt now! 1.00
01:06:48.000 At the end of the Jew clam, it's like six months later, and you go, let's take a look back, or let's see what his butthole looks like now, and we're in the Comedy and Magic Club, and then Ari goes, alright, this is weird. 1.00
01:06:59.000 And he had Skittles attached to his balls? 0.98
01:07:01.000 No, no, like his balls were really like, they looked like they had egg sacks in them, or like tons of little balls in them. 0.99
01:07:07.000 Something was wrong with them? 0.99
01:07:07.000 Yeah. 0.99
01:07:08.000 Like marbles? 1.00
01:07:08.000 It ends with you going, what the fuck's wrong with your balls? 1.00
01:07:12.000 I'd block that out like a child molestation. 1.00
01:07:15.000 I know!
01:07:17.000 That wasn't me that happened to. 1.00
01:07:18.000 What is it about comics that we like to show each other our cocks and show each other our assholes? 1.00
01:07:24.000 I've seen, when it comes to my friend's dicks, I've seen so many of my friend's dicks. 1.00
01:07:28.000 Joey Diaz used to pull his dick out all the time. 1.00
01:07:30.000 It would be hilarious. 1.00
01:07:32.000 Duncan's pulled his dick out. 1.00
01:07:33.000 Has Duncan pulled his dick out? 1.00
01:07:34.000 I've never seen Duncan. 1.00
01:07:36.000 Maybe not Duncan.
01:07:37.000 It's because you want to cross... 1.00
01:07:39.000 All the lines you can.
01:07:41.000 All the taboos.
01:07:41.000 That you can.
01:07:41.000 That you can cross, like, possibly.
01:07:43.000 Right.
01:07:44.000 Like, you could, I mean, like, I've had some weird ones. 0.95
01:07:47.000 Ari had his balls out for, like, almost an entire episode of Opian Anthem once. 0.95
01:07:52.000 We gave this gal, Stalker Patty, we gave her a fake breath strip. 1.00
01:07:57.000 It was just a regular Listerine breath strip, and we told her that it was a psychedelic drug. 0.99
01:08:01.000 And she took it, and we told her she was tripping her balls off. 1.00
01:08:04.000 And so she's there, and Ari pulls his sack out, and we pretend like we don't notice it. 1.00
01:08:09.000 And she's like, oh my god, his balls are out! 0.99
01:08:13.000 What are you talking about? 0.99
01:08:15.000 So for this whole episode, we're pretending that Ari's... 1.00
01:08:19.000 And she is talking about how bad she's tripping, about how she can't believe...
01:08:23.000 It was complete power of suggestion and placebo effect. 0.99
01:08:26.000 She was tripping her balls off. 1.00
01:08:28.000 Did you ever show your dick and balls to anyone at the store early days? 1.00
01:08:32.000 I don't know. 1.00
01:08:32.000 Bobby Lee's another one. 1.00
01:08:33.000 I've seen Bobby Lee.
01:08:34.000 I've seen many pictures of Bobby tucked like a woman with his pants down in the bar area of the comedy store. 1.00
01:08:41.000 I've only met Bobby like four or five times, and I've seen his dick and ass a couple times, I think. 1.00
01:08:47.000 Jamie always shows me his dick. 1.00
01:08:47.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:08:48.000 Jamie's just always got his hog out.
01:08:52.000 Guys with real big pieces will pull them out pretty quick, too.
01:08:55.000 No, that's not true, because I've never done it.
01:09:00.000 I was going by the fact that I've never done it. 0.99
01:09:02.000 I definitely can't say I haven't shown someone my dick. 0.99
01:09:05.000 I haven't pulled it out for whatever reason. 0.99
01:09:07.000 I definitely have done it at least once.
01:09:08.000 But it's not a mainstay.
01:09:10.000 Like, for Joey, for years, it was a mainstay.
01:09:12.000 Joey would have his pants, because, you know, Joey doesn't really find belts that work.
01:09:16.000 He doesn't find pants that fit.
01:09:18.000 And so, he's always at a state, always, where he could just shake and his pants would drop.
01:09:22.000 And he'll go, ha ha ha! 1.00
01:09:24.000 And his balls and dick are just hanging out in front of everybody. 1.00
01:09:28.000 Joey did that, I don't know how many times. 1.00
01:09:30.000 I got a picture of him carrying a waitress on his shoulder, and his pants are down by his knees, and his balls and his dick is hanging out, and he's in the back parking lot area of the Comedy Store. 0.98
01:09:40.000 And by the way, this was back when Joey had zero career. 0.99
01:09:44.000 Joey gave no fucks even when he was starving. 0.99
01:09:47.000 Okay, Joey Diaz has been Joey Diaz since the jump Like he's always been a madman like before he was killing on the road and making great money He didn't give a fuck even back then was barely getting by trying to hustle get gigs together But he has always been like that's like he's the flag bearer for not giving a fuck on the west coast You say you don't give a fuck, 1.00
01:10:09.000 but do Joey Diaz not give a fuck that was always the flag bearer He was always the standard Isn't it weird that girls don't just show their pussies more often? 1.00
01:10:17.000 Like, they don't just be like, yo, check out my pussy! 1.00
01:10:18.000 Just like guys do. 1.00
01:10:19.000 There's not a couple...
01:10:20.000 Because it's a male thing.
01:10:21.000 But let me tell you, but how far that's come is way different. 0.99
01:10:25.000 Like, how fast average girls will pull their pussies out is pretty crazy. 1.00
01:10:29.000 Well, I think there's a lot of competition now, too, with all this Tinder and all these different Match.com and all these different dating sites and shit. 0.99
01:10:35.000 People are just getting laid left and right. 0.95
01:10:37.000 Like, you get left out in the cold if you try to hold back. 1.00
01:10:39.000 I mean, that fucking... 0.99
01:10:41.000 What's that? 0.99
01:10:42.000 The website's about, like...
01:10:44.000 Ashley Madison?
01:10:45.000 Yeah, yeah, Ashley Madison.
01:10:46.000 Websites where it's like to...
01:10:47.000 People that cheat. 1.00
01:10:48.000 To fuck, yeah. 1.00
01:10:48.000 Can you imagine dating a girl that her job was a secretary to work for Ashley Madison? 1.00
01:10:54.000 You never trust her ever.
01:10:56.000 You would trust nobody!
01:10:57.000 She would trust nobody.
01:10:58.000 You couldn't trust her.
01:11:00.000 No one would trust anybody.
01:11:01.000 Their jingles are great.
01:11:02.000 Yeah, it's hilarious.
01:11:04.000 I mean, what a great idea.
01:11:04.000 Make a website that helps people cheat.
01:11:07.000 And what's so smart is in their commercials, too, they have it be a girl getting caught by her husband using Ashley Madison.
01:11:13.000 Right, of course.
01:11:14.000 And then he goes, she's like, you know, I don't want to be celibate anymore.
01:11:16.000 And he goes, eh, I understand.
01:11:19.000 He's like, she goes, you know, maybe you should try it, too.
01:11:21.000 Like, you know, we should both just, and it's like, that's probably not how it goes.
01:11:25.000 Please, it's going to, guns going to come out, shots fired, cops show up, no one wants to go in the house, domestic violence, always a scary thing for police officers.
01:11:32.000 The only thing on the computer. 1.00
01:11:34.000 You fucking cunt! 1.00
01:11:37.000 Fuck you! 1.00
01:11:38.000 Bang, bang! 1.00
01:11:39.000 They're shooting back and forth at each other.
01:11:43.000 Ashley Madison, this is what we do.
01:11:46.000 It's crazy, man.
01:11:49.000 500% spike from women on the day after Mother's Day.
01:11:52.000 Whoa.
01:11:53.000 Well, that's what they're saying.
01:11:54.000 According to its data.
01:11:56.000 Come on.
01:11:57.000 They have data.
01:11:58.000 442% increase in science.
01:12:00.000 That's what we expect. 1.00
01:12:01.000 Come on, where's your fucking data? 1.00
01:12:03.000 It's Ashley Madison math. 1.00
01:12:05.000 This is a whole different system.
01:12:06.000 This is a fluff piece.
01:12:08.000 No scientists are doing studies on whether Ashley Madison is going to experience an uptake in business.
01:12:14.000 They did that to make people pay attention to them.
01:12:16.000 I'm not on it.
01:12:17.000 What?
01:12:18.000 I've never done Tinder.
01:12:20.000 Really? 1.00
01:12:21.000 You don't need to, you sexy bitch. 1.00
01:12:23.000 Nose ring, slinging dick, telling jokes. 1.00
01:12:25.000 My girlfriend... 0.99
01:12:28.000 She's on Thrinder, where you try, but that doesn't work ever.
01:12:31.000 What, you become friends?
01:12:32.000 No, no, no.
01:12:33.000 She's on Thrinder, where you're like, it's trying to find threesomes. 1.00
01:12:36.000 Like, find girls for threesomes. 0.99
01:12:37.000 Yeah, but I don't know.
01:12:38.000 It hasn't worked yet.
01:12:39.000 Maybe it's only been a couple weeks, I guess.
01:12:40.000 You need cocaine for that.
01:12:42.000 Yeah.
01:12:43.000 That's the only way that works.
01:12:44.000 No!
01:12:44.000 You pulled it off.
01:12:45.000 I'm sure you have a few times.
01:12:47.000 Yeah, you're right.
01:12:48.000 It's like, man did start fires before they figured out lighters.
01:12:50.000 You're absolutely right. 0.99
01:12:51.000 But it wasn't so good sitting there with some fucking moss and a stick. 0.99
01:12:54.000 Right. 1.00
01:12:55.000 Shit takes a lot. 1.00
01:12:56.000 You're absolutely right. 1.00
01:12:57.000 I guess coke would help.
01:12:59.000 Coke helps.
01:13:00.000 For sure.
01:13:01.000 Yeah, that's...
01:13:01.000 If you try to get her to pull strippers, they're already coked up.
01:13:04.000 You don't have to worry about it.
01:13:05.000 Look at you.
01:13:06.000 You're thinking ahead.
01:13:06.000 I love it.
01:13:07.000 I love it.
01:13:09.000 Just go to strip clubs. 0.99
01:13:10.000 I mean...
01:13:11.000 Don't you feel like...
01:13:12.000 We only went to strip club once.
01:13:13.000 It was her first time, and she did pull a stripper. 1.00
01:13:14.000 She was great.
01:13:15.000 See?
01:13:15.000 Some guys feel, at least, that are comics.
01:13:19.000 The lifestyle is so ridiculous. 1.00
01:13:21.000 You're in a nightclub every fucking night. 1.00
01:13:23.000 You're drinking all the time. 1.00
01:13:25.000 You're smoking pot.
01:13:27.000 If anybody's got mushrooms, you're going to do those too.
01:13:30.000 You're eating at 3 o'clock in the morning. 0.99
01:13:31.000 You're getting up whenever the fuck you want to. 1.00
01:13:33.000 You're hanging out with hilarious, ridiculous people that want to get high and go to the movies at 1 in the afternoon. 1.00
01:13:38.000 You're like, fuck it, let's do it. 1.00
01:13:39.000 And you're laughing all the time. 1.00
01:13:41.000 You're going on the road.
01:13:42.000 Hanging out and going from airport to rental car to hotel, all these cracking jokes.
01:13:47.000 There's very few people that can relate to that kind of debauchery. 0.94
01:13:50.000 Most people are so tied down to some crazy 9-to-5 corporate life, job life, business life, where you've got to fucking pretend to be somebody for eight hours a day. 0.92
01:14:00.000 You can't be loose. 0.97
01:14:01.000 You can't be free.
01:14:02.000 And everybody's trying to conform to that in their...
01:14:05.000 After work life, too. 0.98
01:14:06.000 Everybody's like this weird fucking father-knows-best type clone figure of what an adult and a family is. 0.97
01:14:15.000 And comics were out there living this weird, chaotic life. 0.98
01:14:19.000 But I've actually very young...
01:14:22.000 Had to really balance both those worlds, and I did, you know, it was not the right thing to do, I guess, in many ways, and it was done poorly, but when I got right to the point in comedy, it was about, like, 23, I've been doing it for, like, three, four years, and I was in a world where now I was, like, going on the road and, like, if I was opening for a tell or Patrice and getting pussy and stuff like that and kind of living that lifestyle,
01:14:41.000 like, I also was, you know, married with a baby daughter, you know what I mean?
01:14:44.000 Like, my daughter's 12 now, and I'm 36, you know what I mean?
01:14:47.000 So she's almost 13, so...
01:14:50.000 It's like, it is weird.
01:14:51.000 I did have to do both those worlds, though. 0.98
01:14:53.000 You know, I was picking up from school every day, and then, you know, two weeks later, you know, I'm in Rhode Island with my buddies, and there's, you know, some fat girls blowing everybody and shit. 1.00
01:15:02.000 Do you know what I mean? 1.00
01:15:02.000 Just, like, weird shit. 1.00
01:15:03.000 You know what I'm saying? 0.99
01:15:04.000 Like, just, like, it was very weird to straddle those worlds, because you're also trying to instill morals and class into somebody while you're just, like...
01:15:13.000 Anything...
01:15:14.000 I mean, I did just, like, sexual stuff especially, man.
01:15:17.000 Like, so much stuff just for, like, girls I wasn't even attracted to. 0.99
01:15:20.000 I think I'm just like, well, she will blow me, and, you know, I'll have an opener with me, and she'll suck his dick, too, and whatever, you know? 1.00
01:15:26.000 Like, just insane behavior that most people... 0.99
01:15:30.000 The average guy, even in the world of, like, you know, sexual looseness that we're in kind of now with that stuff, with all social media, like, not a ton of guys have had, like... 0.98
01:15:40.000 Threesomes with it's even one of their two buddies fucking a girl or two girls at once let alone like some of the Shit, someone way better looking than me, I've done a lot more stuff. 0.92
01:15:51.000 Well, they don't have time, right? 0.99
01:15:52.000 Most people are going from college, whatever sex you can get in college, and then, you know, you're working all the time trying to get your degree, then you get a degree, you get a job, you're getting the job, you're working overtime, you're always exhausted.
01:16:03.000 Like, where's the time for threesomes? 0.99
01:16:04.000 Where do you fit in your coke time?
01:16:05.000 You know, all that stuff.
01:16:06.000 What I was going to say is, like, a lot of comics relate to strippers.
01:16:32.000 My daughter's mother is a lawyer.
01:16:34.000 Oh, that's hilarious.
01:16:35.000 It is.
01:16:35.000 It's pretty funny.
01:16:36.000 So she went to school.
01:16:38.000 She did the whole thing.
01:16:39.000 She did the hard work. 1.00
01:16:40.000 She got her fucking law degree. 1.00
01:16:41.000 She took the bar. 1.00
01:16:43.000 I mean, fuck, man. 1.00
01:16:45.000 Yeah, like no shit. 1.00
01:16:47.000 And I tried in years past to kind of like, there'd be these flickers where I'd try to like bring her into the debauchery. 0.99
01:16:55.000 You know what I mean? 0.93
01:16:55.000 I'm like, hey, we should do some of this weird shit together. 0.93
01:16:57.000 And she would, but I felt like I was corrupting a square that kind of wanted to be a square. 0.97
01:17:03.000 You know what I mean?
01:17:04.000 Not that she's a square.
01:17:05.000 I don't want to present it like that. 0.99
01:17:06.000 But it's just like, I felt like I was like, you wouldn't be involved in this kind of creepy shit if it wasn't for me. 0.95
01:17:11.000 This isn't where you want to be. 0.97
01:17:12.000 You know, I gotta...
01:17:14.000 There's nothing wrong with the term square, but I agree with you.
01:17:18.000 There's nothing wrong with being a square, too, right?
01:17:20.000 No.
01:17:20.000 If that's what you're into, there's a lot of people that just like going home, having tea, and reading a book.
01:17:26.000 That is a nice night for them.
01:17:28.000 Why not?
01:17:29.000 If it brings you genuine joy.
01:17:31.000 Why do you have to go to a rave?
01:17:33.000 Why do you have to go on Thrinder and find some other lost soul to partake in this dance of the flesh? 0.99
01:17:40.000 That's the damn way to put it. 0.99
01:17:40.000 We're lost souls. 0.99
01:17:42.000 Asian lost souls. 1.00
01:17:43.000 We're all, I mean, just do whatever the fuck you want to do. 0.99
01:17:46.000 The more people will get over that, I think that's one of the things that I really truly have hope for with this new generation of kids. 0.98
01:17:53.000 All these people, I think, growing up, Excuse me growing up with the internet.
01:17:57.000 I think they're just gonna have a totally different acceptance of people being different I just think that we grew up in a weird time man.
01:18:05.000 We grew up I mean I'm ten years older than you so I grew up mostly kind of in the early 80s You know I went to school in 81 was my first year of high school So, I think that we just grew up in a time where we were just guessing.
01:18:19.000 Nobody kind of knew how many people were out there that were filled with the same amount of angst.
01:18:24.000 You kind of guessed by the movies that we all gravitated towards, or you guessed by the songs that we all listened to. 0.99
01:18:31.000 Fucking coffee with butter in it, dude. 0.99
01:18:32.000 I might have to stop. 1.00
01:18:33.000 Might have to go straight black.
01:18:34.000 Go back to Starbucks, bro.
01:18:36.000 I'm not going back to Starbucks.
01:18:37.000 Caveman coffee all the way.
01:18:38.000 But the butter, man, is not good pre-podcast for the phlegm production.
01:18:43.000 The point is, we didn't know, man.
01:18:45.000 Everybody knows now.
01:18:48.000 Transgender is a perfect example. 1.00
01:18:49.000 We're talking about people that feel they were... 1.00
01:18:50.000 If you were a fucking kid and you were growing up in 1984 and you were a woman trapped in a man's body, you had no fucking friends. 0.99
01:18:59.000 You had no recourse. 1.00
01:19:00.000 Good luck trying to find other people just like you.
01:19:03.000 What, are you going to join some club somewhere that harbors them where they have to come out and admit that they're a part of this?
01:19:08.000 No, now you go online, you can find a whole community of people.
01:19:11.000 Sure, for anything.
01:19:12.000 For anything, furries.
01:19:14.000 But even like, you know, there's communities of... 1.00
01:19:16.000 Fucking pedophiles that find each other, which is like, you know, horrible. 1.00
01:19:19.000 That is horrible, man. 1.00
01:19:20.000 And that's a real issue.
01:19:23.000 You know, that was one of those... 0.99
01:19:24.000 What was that fucking piece? 1.00
01:19:25.000 There was a big expose piece about this guy and his boyfriend who raised their son to be like a sex slave. 1.00
01:19:33.000 And they were bringing his son to all these other grown men. 0.51
01:19:37.000 I forget.
01:19:38.000 You know what I'm talking about, Jamie?
01:19:39.000 Have you seen this?
01:19:42.000 You know, I don't even want to talk about it because it's so disturbing.
01:19:44.000 But it was a crazy expose where they followed these guys for a while and they suspected it.
01:19:51.000 And apparently they had kept this very close-knit relationship with all these rich pedophiles all over the world.
01:19:57.000 And they brought their son all around them.
01:19:59.000 And he was a really young boy. 0.99
01:20:01.000 And they were using him as this sex slave. 0.97
01:20:04.000 And they had figured it out somehow or another. 0.98
01:20:05.000 They figured out how to crack this group of tight-lipped people.
01:20:08.000 Eventually someone, you know, an email slipped out or something.
01:20:12.000 And they figured it out and eventually brought these guys to put this poor kid. 0.99
01:20:15.000 I mean, what the fuck, man? 1.00
01:20:16.000 These are the people that love you. 1.00
01:20:17.000 You're parents.
01:20:18.000 And you're being paraded around with them like this is this perfect family. 1.00
01:20:22.000 And meanwhile, you're bringing this kid around to all these pedophiles and they're fucking them. 1.00
01:20:27.000 Sociopath or psychopath? 1.00
01:20:29.000 I think that's both, right? 0.97
01:20:30.000 I mean, that's a sociopath in that you have no empathy, and a psychopath in that you're doing damage, right?
01:20:36.000 What is the difference between sociopaths?
01:20:38.000 I know I say that all the time.
01:20:40.000 Psychopath can feel emotion.
01:20:43.000 Yeah, I'll find it right now.
01:20:44.000 Psychopath does feel emotion.
01:20:45.000 Really?
01:20:45.000 It's like a flashlight that can do chores.
01:20:51.000 That is a horribly fantastic way to put it. 0.99
01:20:55.000 It's like a Roomba with a butthole. 1.00
01:20:57.000 Okay, here's the difference between a psychopath and a sociopath. 1.00
01:21:02.000 Okay. 0.66
01:21:03.000 Let's see this.
01:21:04.000 Society has conspired with Hollywood playing two seemingly sexy psychological terms into our collective consciousness. 0.99
01:21:11.000 Psychopath and sociopath.
01:21:12.000 Psychopath and sociopath are pop psychology terms for what psychiatry calls an antisocial personality disorder.
01:21:19.000 Today, these two terms are not really well defined in the psychology research literature.
01:21:24.000 Nonetheless, there are some general differences between the two types of personality types, which we'll look in this article.
01:21:30.000 Both types of personalities have pervasive patterns of disregard for the safety and rights of others.
01:21:36.000 Deceit and manipulation are central features to both types of personalities.
01:21:39.000 And contrary to popular belief, a psychopath or sociopath is not necessarily violent.
01:21:45.000 Okay.
01:21:47.000 So, psychopath and sociopath, they share a diagnosis.
01:21:51.000 There's an antisocial personality as someone who has three or more of the following traits.
01:21:55.000 Regularly breaks or flaunts the law, Big J Oakerson.
01:21:59.000 Constantly lies and deceives others, Brian Redband.
01:22:03.000 Is impulsive and doesn't plan ahead, Joe Rogan.
01:22:06.000 Can be prone to fighting and aggressiveness, Joe Rogan.
01:22:09.000 Has a little regard for the safety of others.
01:22:12.000 Brian Redband.
01:22:14.000 Irresponsible.
01:22:14.000 Can't meet financial obligations.
01:22:19.000 Doesn't feel remorse or guilt.
01:22:21.000 That's none of us.
01:22:22.000 We definitely feel guilt.
01:22:23.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:22:24.000 So, Brian, you're most likely to be a psychopath. 1.00
01:22:26.000 Me? 1.00
01:22:27.000 Yeah.
01:22:27.000 I probably am.
01:22:28.000 1% of the general population.
01:22:28.000 Most likely.
01:22:30.000 Sociopath, 4%.
01:22:31.000 Both suffer from...
01:22:35.000 Anti-social personality disorder.
01:22:38.000 Both lack empathy.
01:22:39.000 Both demonstrate complete disregard for the social rules and behavior standards.
01:22:43.000 That's Brian.
01:22:44.000 Both fail to feel any remorse or guilt.
01:22:47.000 That's not you at all.
01:22:48.000 Both are violent.
01:22:49.000 That's not you at all.
01:22:51.000 So that's weird.
01:22:52.000 What's the difference?
01:22:53.000 Okay, whatever.
01:22:54.000 See, this is where I zone out.
01:22:55.000 Pop psychology is a great word, too, because when it does get into the...
01:23:01.000 You know, when it becomes part of the collective cautions, as it says, like people just scapegoat those things so much.
01:23:06.000 How many people in your life just call themselves bipolar?
01:23:08.000 Look at this key difference.
01:23:10.000 Psychopaths are I've dated a lot of these.
01:23:31.000 Huh.
01:23:33.000 That's interesting.
01:23:35.000 Huh.
01:23:35.000 Yeah.
01:23:37.000 That's fucking weird, man. 1.00
01:23:39.000 Either way, fucked up. 1.00
01:23:41.000 Both highly manipulative, impulsive, spontaneous. 1.00
01:23:44.000 Sociopath, more spontaneous. 0.99
01:23:50.000 And psychopath, more manipulative. 1.00
01:23:51.000 Fuck, man. 1.00
01:23:53.000 You could find yourself in a few of those and then things that are definitely not you in all of them, too. 1.00
01:23:58.000 You know what I mean?
01:23:58.000 There's definitely things in there where, you know, when I'm feeling...
01:24:05.000 I'm like, oh my god, I'm like a highly manipulative person.
01:24:07.000 It'll make me upset at myself.
01:24:09.000 But that, just the next thing under there is like, it's because I have personal tattoos.
01:24:12.000 I don't want to hurt people or anything like that.
01:24:14.000 You know what I mean?
01:24:15.000 I just feel like when you break variables down like that to like two columns.
01:24:19.000 That's what I mean, yeah.
01:24:20.000 You find too much of yourself and none of yourself in all of them.
01:24:22.000 None of yourself.
01:24:23.000 You're complex, man.
01:24:24.000 I mean, you're a lot of different things, and you're a lot of different things from week to week.
01:24:30.000 I mean, you're a different person one week, and then the next week, you know, things might be going way better in your life, and you might interact with the exact same person in the exact same moment in a totally different way, which makes you pretty much a different person in a lot of ways.
01:24:45.000 You change all the time.
01:24:47.000 I think the real thing is empathy.
01:24:49.000 People who lack empathy.
01:24:50.000 That really scares us. 1.00
01:24:52.000 People who will victimize other people, grueling other people, want to kill other people, want to do harm to other people, stalk other people, that kind of shit. 1.00
01:25:00.000 That freaks us out. 0.99
01:25:01.000 And that's what we're really worried about.
01:25:02.000 We're worried about someone who goes after someone.
01:25:06.000 Like, someone who tries to harm them, especially physically. 0.71
01:25:09.000 That scares the shit out of us.
01:25:11.000 Like, someone could just... 1.00
01:25:12.000 Like, have you ever seen a video of this guy who was into just stabbing people in the ass? 1.00
01:25:15.000 No. 0.99
01:25:16.000 Yeah, he stabbed a bunch of people, and they got him on a security camera. 0.99
01:25:19.000 This guy was in, like, a retail store, just walked us, some dude, just shanks this guy in the ass, like, five, six times. 0.99
01:25:25.000 He doesn't even know what's happening. 0.99
01:25:27.000 It's a black dude doing it to a white guy, too, which makes it extra spooky. 1.00
01:25:31.000 The idea that you could just zig when you should have zagged, and you run into some guy who has a buck knife, and he's just shoving it in your ass in a department store. 1.00
01:25:41.000 Like, that's possible. 0.99
01:25:43.000 Like, you could run into that guy.
01:25:45.000 That kind of stuff freaks us out.
01:25:46.000 There was a, in the East Village, maybe a year ago...
01:25:51.000 And they've had video of it, which is pretty brutal.
01:25:53.000 It's just a little old Asian guy walking home.
01:25:56.000 Like, I think it was even that late at night.
01:25:57.000 Maybe like 10, 11 o'clock at night.
01:25:59.000 And I could be wrong about that.
01:26:00.000 But there's this video, and this black dude goes up behind him, and it's a little old Asian guy. 0.96
01:26:05.000 And he just starts beating him against a wall. 0.92
01:26:08.000 He just beats him to death.
01:26:09.000 In the middle of the street, out of nowhere, unprovoked.
01:26:11.000 I mean, comes up behind him and attacks him.
01:26:13.000 The word was he was like, you know, all screwed up on drugs, the kid. 0.79
01:26:17.000 Like, whacked down on something. 0.78
01:26:19.000 But...
01:26:20.000 The police station is on my block.
01:26:23.000 In the East Village.
01:26:24.000 So they brought him in there.
01:26:24.000 So we saw all the news vans and everything out there.
01:26:27.000 Me and my buddy went over and we just kind of watched the guy come out.
01:26:32.000 To be a part of something like that, his face when they brought him out, he definitely felt something.
01:26:38.000 Do you know what I mean?
01:26:38.000 He had kind of a scowl on his face, but it didn't seem like...
01:26:41.000 Remorse.
01:26:42.000 Just the face of a guy who was involved, just that violent of an action.
01:26:47.000 Like there's a death.
01:26:48.000 Like a death happened.
01:26:49.000 And it wasn't even like a...
01:26:53.000 We all fear those things, and also I don't see myself doing it.
01:26:57.000 I know fight or flight, obviously, but hitting someone in the head with a hammer, the thought of what that would just do, the actual physical action of that is mind-blowing. 0.99
01:27:07.000 I couldn't possibly wrap my brain around Just like how some people are just so smart you could barely understand half the fucking shit they're saying. 0.98
01:27:15.000 It's like when you talk to particle physicists and they're talking about CERN and these experiments they're doing trying to locate the large, you know, using the Large Hadron Collider to try to locate the Higgs boson particle. 1.00
01:27:29.000 Like, what the fuck, man? 0.96
01:27:30.000 Are we really the same thing? 1.00
01:27:32.000 Well, there's other dudes whose brains go off in a different direction in a way that you can't even recognize.
01:27:38.000 The thought patterns of someone who just walks into a Walmart with an axe and just starts taking people out.
01:27:43.000 Those people exist.
01:27:45.000 The guy who got on the tower in Austin, Texas that one day, the school in the university, I think it was back in the 60s or the 70s, he just started shooting people from the tower.
01:27:56.000 Until they finally took him out. 1.00
01:27:57.000 But fuck, man. 1.00
01:27:58.000 But did you know with Ted... 1.00
01:28:01.000 What the hell was his name?
01:28:01.000 Ted Bundy?
01:28:02.000 No, not Ted Bundy.
01:28:03.000 Charles Whitman is who you're talking about.
01:28:05.000 The guy from the Tower of Texas, yeah?
01:28:07.000 Does his name?
01:28:08.000 Apparently, when he was autopsy, he had a tumor on his temporal lobe.
01:28:13.000 Oh.
01:28:13.000 It took away all of it.
01:28:15.000 So when it just got big enough, it took away all his inhibitions.
01:28:18.000 He actually killed everything he saw on his way to that tower.
01:28:21.000 He killed his dog at home.
01:28:22.000 He killed, I think, maybe his girl.
01:28:24.000 But he killed a few people on the way.
01:28:25.000 So it was just, he would have actually been found not guilty today.
01:28:30.000 I heard arguments about saying people say he would not be found not guilty today because that was actually a physical problem that guy had.
01:28:36.000 But, you know, can you, am I saying the right word here, behaviorally teach someone to become a psychopath?
01:28:45.000 Because, you know, we're in L.A. now too, which, you know, was always home of like the Crips bloods, gang wars. 0.84
01:28:50.000 I mean, you just take these kids, they're willing to like shoot...
01:29:05.000 We're good to go. 1.00
01:29:14.000 More violent and more horrific crime so that everyone's afraid of you, and you become this bad motherfucker with a lollipop which just shoots people in the face. 1.00
01:29:21.000 There's a lot of dudes like that because that's where they get that good feeling. 1.00
01:29:24.000 They get their good feeling of accomplishment by being the biggest fucking psychopath around. 0.99
01:29:28.000 That's just a total failure of the environment that person's being developed in. 0.99
01:29:32.000 But that's also what they have to do in war, man.
01:29:34.000 I mean, that's what war is all about.
01:29:36.000 War is all about turning people into psychopaths. 0.99
01:29:39.000 Do you see that fucking thing I posted on Instagram today? 1.00
01:29:41.000 Look at this thing. 0.99
01:29:42.000 Pull up this image that I posted on Instagram.
01:29:44.000 It's from World War I. Now look at this.
01:29:46.000 This picture is 20 years before King Kong.
01:29:49.000 And the picture is a propaganda picture depicting the Germans as savages.
01:29:54.000 Oh, wow. 0.84
01:29:55.000 This was about Germany.
01:29:56.000 See, he's got this club in his hand, and the club says KULTUR, K-U-L-T-U-R. That's like, I guess how you say it in Germany, maybe?
01:30:06.000 I don't know.
01:30:06.000 But it's supposed to represent German culture.
01:30:09.000 And this was, this predated King Kong by 20 fucking years. 0.98
01:30:12.000 But it's a gorilla, like, with like a crown, like a German helmet with a spike on the top of it. 1.00
01:30:19.000 And the gorilla's holding a woman and her tits are out. 1.00
01:30:22.000 Her tits are out. 1.00
01:30:23.000 You'll have to show tits back then. 1.00
01:30:24.000 Even in an army propaganda film, you've got to protect the tits. 1.00
01:30:27.000 And this gorilla with this club, it says, destroy this mad brute. 0.99
01:30:32.000 And then it says, enlist U.S. Army. 0.83
01:30:35.000 And if you go to Joe Rogan on Instagram, you can see it.
01:30:38.000 It's pretty crazy.
01:30:39.000 In the sand, it says America.
01:30:41.000 I wonder if...
01:30:42.000 They kind of stole the idea for King Kong from that poster.
01:30:45.000 I wonder if that was a pretty well-known poster back in the day and maybe the writer got the idea from looking at it.
01:30:52.000 Could have.
01:30:52.000 Kid could have grown up seeing that, you know, and then 20 years later made a movie like it.
01:30:56.000 I mean, I think, but the idea of guerrilla, you know, at the time, this is another really interesting point, at the time, mountain guerrillas were not even known to be real.
01:31:04.000 Like, mountain gorillas really only became known for sure in the early 1900s.
01:31:11.000 So, this is a relatively recent animal in a lot of ways.
01:31:15.000 Like, gorillas, there's always been talk of gorillas and different types of primates, and they've always known that chimpanzees existed, and orangutans were very confusing to people in the early 1800s.
01:31:26.000 But when they were documenting all the different animals, they didn't definitively document the mountain gorilla until the early 1900s.
01:31:33.000 So you're looking at something, probably, I guess that's supposed to represent a mountain gorilla or some kind of gorilla.
01:31:38.000 You're looking at something that was like a relatively recent idea to people, this picture of a gorilla.
01:31:43.000 And it's also, you're looking at something that's only probably 50 years after the invention of photography.
01:31:51.000 Think about 50 years ago.
01:31:53.000 You're talking about like 1960-something, right?
01:31:56.000 Think of that.
01:31:57.000 Think of 1960-something.
01:31:58.000 We're still driving 1960s cars around.
01:32:00.000 Those are classic cars. 0.99
01:32:01.000 That was when the fucking photograph was invented for them. 0.99
01:32:05.000 And here they are looking at this image of a gorilla carrying a woman like, whoa. 0.99
01:32:09.000 The idea of a gorilla was pretty recent.
01:32:12.000 Yeah, but that's Germany.
01:32:14.000 Isn't that crazy?
01:32:15.000 Like, France and England were supposed to be civilization, and Germany, these were mad barbarians from, like, the Roman days. 0.97
01:32:23.000 Like, that's what the Germanic tribes, that's what we thought of as Germans in the 1900s.
01:32:28.000 They connected them to barbarians.
01:32:31.000 Really?
01:32:31.000 Yes!
01:32:32.000 Isn't that amazing?
01:32:33.000 So much so that when we went to war with them, they couldn't have been more sleek.
01:32:38.000 They were so advanced in so many ways.
01:32:42.000 So much engineering. 0.99
01:32:43.000 Weaponry and all that shit. 0.97
01:32:45.000 But to this day, the automobile industry, their cars are some of the most advanced cars in the world. 0.98
01:32:50.000 The Germans make Mercedes, they make BMW, and they make Porsche. 0.97
01:32:54.000 I mean, we're done.
01:32:55.000 Those are like the three, like, if you had to pick, like, a top three most advanced, best engineered, high-end cars, those are the three. 0.98
01:33:05.000 Like, those are the top of the, like, Ferraris are badass, but everybody knows that fucking thing's gonna break. 0.83
01:33:10.000 If you're one of those guys... 0.99
01:33:11.000 Gonna crack if you bump into someone.
01:33:13.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:33:13.000 You buy a fucking Ferrari, like, bitch, you know you can't go to Vegas and that thing. 1.00
01:33:17.000 You're gonna be halfway in the desert and something. 1.00
01:33:19.000 Bang! 1.00
01:33:20.000 Bang! 1.00
01:33:20.000 Bang! 1.00
01:33:22.000 Have you seen that car that goes on air?
01:33:26.000 It's called, like, Blow or Leaf or something like that.
01:33:29.000 It goes 100 miles on air.
01:33:31.000 What?
01:33:31.000 And it has a compressor in it that takes four hours to charge.
01:33:36.000 You just plug it in.
01:33:37.000 No way!
01:33:38.000 Or you can go to a gas station and if they have, like, the compressor for your...
01:33:42.000 You can fill it?
01:33:42.000 Fill it up in four minutes.
01:33:44.000 Dude, you gotta be kidding me.
01:33:45.000 No, and what's crazy is it's already big in the UK. They're just now making a plant in Hawaii, and it only costs $10,000.
01:33:54.000 Wow, that's a game changer.
01:33:57.000 Yeah, Ed Begley on that.
01:33:58.000 Yeah, Ed's probably the CEO. It was on Shark Tank.
01:34:01.000 Can you blow in it if you have really strong lungs?
01:34:03.000 Right.
01:34:05.000 That should be like your workout every day.
01:34:07.000 It's pumping your car up.
01:34:08.000 Look at that little thing.
01:34:09.000 I see people in smart cars in New York.
01:34:13.000 It's terrifying.
01:34:14.000 Dude, that doesn't even have two wheels in the front.
01:34:16.000 That's a bike.
01:34:17.000 I don't even know if that's the same one I saw.
01:34:19.000 That's a bike with a helmet on.
01:34:21.000 The Aircomobile?
01:34:21.000 That's what it is.
01:34:22.000 The AirPod.
01:34:23.000 The AirPod was on Shark Tank.
01:34:24.000 Oh yeah, I guess that's it. 1.00
01:34:26.000 Let's see a video on this bitch. 1.00
01:34:27.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:34:28.000 That looks to me like a bike wearing a helmet.
01:34:30.000 That's all it looks like.
01:34:31.000 That does not look real.
01:34:32.000 And it definitely doesn't look like something you'd be safe in. 0.96
01:34:35.000 How does that pass all the crash standards and all that shit? 0.77
01:34:38.000 Well, that was one of the things. 0.94
01:34:39.000 Like, all the sharks didn't invest in it because, you know, they only have three prototypes of this, and it was just about to go into the manufacturing, so they haven't done the actual test yet.
01:34:50.000 Why don't you just Google it, Jamie?
01:34:51.000 Just Google AirPod video.
01:34:53.000 Because we can't just go on their Facebook page and click on every link. 1.00
01:34:56.000 You're going to get this dog shit. 0.99
01:34:57.000 This is how we made the seat. 1.00
01:34:59.000 What the fuck about this seat? 0.99
01:35:01.000 We'll stand if you could drive 100 miles from here. 0.99
01:35:04.000 A type of foam that's very light so we can drive forever on air. 0.99
01:35:06.000 Look at this fucking thing driving around. 1.00
01:35:08.000 This is crazy. 1.00
01:35:09.000 Dude, that gets no traction.
01:35:12.000 Oh, God.
01:35:12.000 That's so scary.
01:35:13.000 Imagine if you were on black ice and that piece of shit. 1.00
01:35:16.000 Can you imagine? 1.00
01:35:16.000 I think you could make that same thing if you could pedal it. 1.00
01:35:18.000 You could probably pedal something that size.
01:35:20.000 Yeah.
01:35:20.000 I know, right?
01:35:21.000 Probably pretty good.
01:35:22.000 Backup pedal.
01:35:22.000 A boost.
01:35:23.000 The pedal would be a boost.
01:35:25.000 It's a moped.
01:35:27.000 Look how you get out, though.
01:35:28.000 That's so Jetson. 0.98
01:35:29.000 That's sick.
01:35:30.000 Oh, and you control it using a joystick, like a video game.
01:35:35.000 Whoa, that is trippy.
01:35:38.000 I like that.
01:35:38.000 That's trippy.
01:35:39.000 But what if you want to text and drive?
01:35:40.000 You can't even do that.
01:35:41.000 You need two hands to control this pitch.
01:35:43.000 I want in the middle, like Maverick, if I'm going to control the joystick.
01:35:46.000 That's probably a good idea to keep people from texting and driving.
01:35:49.000 Make them control the car with two sticks. 0.55
01:35:52.000 Two-hand joysticks, yeah.
01:35:54.000 One for turning, one for going straight and back.
01:35:56.000 But you can't look slick.
01:35:57.000 Like, if you're rolling your 6'4", and you got your hand up like this, rolling in my 6'4", and all the hook is saying, right?
01:36:08.000 That long arm holding on to the top of the steering wheel.
01:36:11.000 Sup, boys?
01:36:12.000 Sup?
01:36:13.000 You know?
01:36:13.000 I don't think the windows go down the thing.
01:36:15.000 Look at the fucking window! 1.00
01:36:17.000 You're just blasting yourself with music. 1.00
01:36:19.000 Look at the front wheel.
01:36:20.000 It's about as big as a tic-tac.
01:36:23.000 It's a go-kart wheel.
01:36:24.000 It's a wagon.
01:36:25.000 It's like a child's toy.
01:36:27.000 Wheelbarrow.
01:36:27.000 Wheelbarrow.
01:36:27.000 Wheelbarrow.
01:36:28.000 Yeah.
01:36:30.000 It's so small. 1.00
01:36:31.000 I mean, look at this weird fucking engine, too. 1.00
01:36:34.000 But hey, man, if you're in a fucking city, do you think it has heat? 0.99
01:36:37.000 That's a good question, right? 0.99
01:36:39.000 Does that have heat?
01:36:41.000 Does it have anything?
01:36:41.000 Oh, yeah.
01:36:42.000 How weird is this?
01:36:43.000 Watching that thing fill up with air. 0.99
01:36:45.000 What if someone comes along and just shoots a hole in your air tank and you fucking explode? 0.99
01:36:49.000 Right? 0.99
01:36:51.000 It's oxygen, yeah.
01:36:52.000 It's just oxygen.
01:36:53.000 What's interesting, though, is that this is even possible.
01:36:55.000 Can you imagine somebody like Porsche or somebody getting behind this kind of idea of We're not even using fuel, we're using air. 0.99
01:37:02.000 That's fucking nuts. 0.98
01:37:04.000 Yeah, well, you know, there's a problem with that. 1.00
01:37:08.000 How are you generating that air?
01:37:10.000 Like, what are you doing to get that compressed air?
01:37:12.000 And how much fossil fuels are involved in making that air compressed? 0.97
01:37:16.000 Yeah, that process might require some shit like that. 0.92
01:37:19.000 I mean, maybe they can do it with solar. 0.97
01:37:21.000 Maybe there's a way to power some sort of a generator with solar that pumps air.
01:37:27.000 That seems possible. 0.99
01:37:29.000 If that's true, boy, that would be like the greenest shit of all time. 0.99
01:37:33.000 But it would also be real. 0.99
01:37:35.000 Oh, wow, there's a back seat.
01:37:37.000 Or is it a two-seater?
01:37:38.000 No, it seems like she climbed in the back.
01:37:40.000 Or is this a different one?
01:37:41.000 No, it was a two-seater.
01:37:42.000 They were next to each other.
01:37:44.000 Oh, so there's more than one model.
01:37:47.000 Hmm.
01:37:47.000 Yeah.
01:37:49.000 Do you ever watch that Shark Tank show?
01:37:51.000 No.
01:37:51.000 It's actually pretty decent.
01:37:53.000 There's not enough time.
01:37:54.000 I find a lot of things in there that are, like, this company called Bagel Bites in New York.
01:37:59.000 I'm now, like, addicted to them.
01:38:00.000 They just send you all these different kinds of bagels, and they're just like little bagel balls with cream cheese in the middle of them that you put in your oven. 0.98
01:38:06.000 It's fucking amazing. 0.98
01:38:07.000 I support that show, Hunter. 0.96
01:38:09.000 I support anybody who's encouraging people to come up with a good thing.
01:38:12.000 Diamond Dallas Page Yoga. 0.99
01:38:14.000 Fuck yeah, dude. 1.00
01:38:15.000 Have you tried it? 1.00
01:38:16.000 It's really good.
01:38:17.000 It's pretty hard. 1.00
01:38:18.000 He's a bad motherfucker, Dallas Diamond Page. 1.00
01:38:20.000 Yeah, I interviewed him. 1.00
01:38:21.000 He gave me a copy of him.
01:38:23.000 I've been doing it on the road.
01:38:23.000 Yeah, it's a good thing doing hotels on the road.
01:38:25.000 Dude, yoga is hard to do.
01:38:29.000 I would have laughed at yoga three years ago.
01:38:32.000 I'll show you a Hicks and Gracie documentary called Choke, where it shows Hickson doing yoga and you realize like, oh, I think I have a weird idea about yoga because I think of all these chicks doing it. 0.97
01:38:42.000 Yoga is hard, man.
01:38:43.000 And it's really good for your body.
01:38:45.000 And it's fantastic for your core.
01:38:47.000 See, there's a lot of people that, and I was guilty of this myself for sure, when you work out all sorts of different ways...
01:38:54.000 But what you don't work out in is your body's ability to move as one unit and your flexibility and your body's like balance and sovereignty.
01:39:06.000 Like where your body, you could do whatever you want to do with your body.
01:39:08.000 Like stand on one foot and just stick your leg straight up in the air.
01:39:12.000 There's a lot of people that can lift a fuckload of weight. 0.99
01:39:15.000 There's a lot of people that can run upstairs and do laps on this fucking pool and back and forth and back and forth and they're just animals. 0.99
01:39:22.000 But Ask them to stand on one leg, grab their foot, and stick their foot straight up in the air, and then balance. 0.99
01:39:27.000 They literally can't do it.
01:39:28.000 They can't balance their body like that.
01:39:30.000 It's because they don't have full control of their body.
01:39:33.000 And what yoga gives you is this weird control of your body.
01:39:37.000 When you get really good at yoga, like Hickson did...
01:39:40.000 He was one of the reasons why he was one of the best jiu-jitsu guys in the world.
01:39:43.000 It wasn't just that he knew every move there was.
01:39:46.000 It wasn't just that his dad was Ilio Gracie.
01:39:48.000 He was one of the greatest jiu-jitsu artists, one of the most important martial artists ever.
01:39:52.000 It was also his physical abilities were superior.
01:39:55.000 Because he was into all that yoga and all this bodyweight stuff, he would do all these crazy exercises, man.
01:40:01.000 He would do all these balance beam things.
01:40:03.000 It's pretty dope.
01:40:03.000 There's a video of him on the beach in Santa Monica.
01:40:07.000 And he's doing, like, these pistol squats on a balance beam, holding his foot up and sticks his foot right above his head.
01:40:12.000 And he's a jiu-jitsu master.
01:40:14.000 Pull that video up.
01:40:15.000 It's crazy to see, because you think about what you can do with your body, and you think about how much effort it would take to be able to do what this guy's doing right now.
01:40:23.000 I'll tell you, Diamond Dallas Page in his 50s, in the video, standing on one leg and holding his leg up in the air, Oh, yeah.
01:40:30.000 And the way they pull it out, too, it's when you go up in the middle and you pull it out, and it's really impressive.
01:40:35.000 I mean, I can't even get close to what he's doing.
01:40:37.000 Well, it's also what he's done is fix a lot of people's bodies.
01:40:40.000 I had real annoying lower back problems for about a year and a half, and it's made that much, much better.
01:41:07.000 I bet it would.
01:41:08.000 That it works sort of like your legs are hanging.
01:41:08.000 Much, much better.
01:41:13.000 You lean your upper body over a table and your legs are dangling.
01:41:17.000 From the waist down, they're dangling.
01:41:18.000 And they hook up to these rollers like a leg curl machine, sort of.
01:41:21.000 And with a straight leg, you lift your leg all the way up and then you let it go down.
01:41:25.000 And as it's going down, it It pulls on your lower back.
01:41:29.000 It's like an active decompression.
01:41:32.000 So you lift it up, it strengthens.
01:41:34.000 You lift it down, it decompresses.
01:41:36.000 Lift it up, it strengthens.
01:41:37.000 If you want to look at it, folks, it's called Reverse Hyper.
01:41:40.000 You can get it online.
01:41:41.000 I bought mine from a company called Rogue Fitness.
01:41:44.000 Rogue Fitness is all the CrossFit stuff. 0.91
01:41:46.000 They have all that cool shit, but I'm telling you, this Reverse Hyper has been amazing for my back. 0.96
01:41:51.000 It's so good. 0.97
01:41:52.000 Have you ever done, I was, my apartment in New York is just too small to store one, but I want to get an inversion table soap.
01:41:57.000 I have one back there.
01:41:58.000 I have two back there.
01:41:59.000 One that you do from the waist down, you like lean forward on it.
01:42:03.000 I'll show you both of them after we do that.
01:42:04.000 Yeah, I'm so curious.
01:42:05.000 Let's hang upside down like a bat.
01:42:06.000 I do it every day.
01:42:07.000 I do it every day.
01:42:08.000 I do it every day for five minutes.
01:42:10.000 Every time I work out, every time I lift weights, especially if I lift anything heavy, like if I do squats or anything like that, I do it right after I'm done.
01:42:10.000 Every day.
01:42:19.000 And I do it for as long as I can until I feel relaxed.
01:42:23.000 I just want my back to open up.
01:42:25.000 Do you feel that happen?
01:42:26.000 Do you actually feel it like they make noise at all?
01:42:29.000 But without that noise.
01:42:31.000 See, like that noise.
01:42:33.000 That's exactly what you're hoping for.
01:42:35.000 That's the magic cure.
01:42:36.000 But it's not.
01:42:37.000 That's not really.
01:42:38.000 Nothing's really happening there.
01:42:39.000 That's like nitrogen being released.
01:42:40.000 It's not really fixing anything.
01:42:42.000 It just sounds cool.
01:42:43.000 I love the sound.
01:42:45.000 Like when I go to the car.
01:42:46.000 Chiropractor and I get cracked.
01:42:47.000 I love the sound.
01:42:48.000 But the reality is that's not what's fixing anything.
01:42:50.000 What's fixing is the adjustment of the spine and what's fixing when you're doing that conversion table, inversion table, it's the decompression of your muscles.
01:42:59.000 Like your muscles relaxing and stretching.
01:43:02.000 So you've got to be able to actually concentrate on relaxing your lower back.
01:43:07.000 And most people can't.
01:43:08.000 Most people, they tense up.
01:43:10.000 So even when they lie hanging by their ankles, it's one of the reasons why some doctors Erroneously think it's not effective.
01:43:16.000 They go, well, you're just going to support it with your back anyway.
01:43:19.000 A little.
01:43:21.000 But if you understand how your body works, you can relax that area.
01:43:25.000 And I feel a great difference between holding it tense and relaxing that there.
01:43:30.000 I feel the stress on that lower back area.
01:43:33.000 And it's lengthening the muscles.
01:43:35.000 It's pulling them.
01:43:36.000 It's stretching them in a way that it's very hard to stretch those muscles.
01:43:39.000 It's very hard to stretch them that way.
01:43:42.000 Your body's malleable, man.
01:43:43.000 The reason why some people are super flexible, there's a little bit of genetics involved there, but a lot of it is just pushing.
01:43:49.000 Just hard work and pushing on the flexibility.
01:43:53.000 Just every day, making it move a little bit more.
01:43:55.000 Move a little bit more. 1.00
01:43:56.000 When you see a dude with crazy holes in their ear, you can do that shit to your body. 1.00
01:44:01.000 You can stretch things out. 1.00
01:44:02.000 You can put a plate in your lip.
01:44:03.000 You can do that also.
01:44:05.000 You can lengthen your neck at all.
01:44:07.000 Yeah, you can lengthen your neck with those wires of those crazy ladies put on, but you can also kind of stretch your body out that way too. 1.00
01:44:13.000 There's soft tissue manipulation. 0.99
01:44:15.000 There's only a certain amount you can get away with, but you can, if you push it hard enough, long enough, you're really dedicated, you can stretch a lot of shit. 0.97
01:44:23.000 And one of the problems that people have with their lower backs especially is their hamstrings. 0.84
01:44:28.000 Like, if your hamstrings are really tense, That puts a tremendous amount of pressure on your lower back, and it also limits your mobility.
01:44:35.000 It limits the way your body can move around, and that also puts pressure on your lower back.
01:44:39.000 Do you stretch at all with your hamstrings?
01:44:42.000 I do.
01:44:43.000 Yeah, I've taken a lot more to stretching.
01:44:45.000 I did CrossFit for like two years, and I lost a bunch of weight doing it, which was great in that regard.
01:44:52.000 But, uh, the damage on, like, speed powerlifting is not a good idea.
01:44:56.000 It fucked up your back? 0.54
01:44:57.000 That's what I think did it, yeah. 0.94
01:44:58.000 I mean, just like, you know...
01:44:59.000 You would be one of men.
01:45:00.000 Swinging kettlebells, uh, sometimes just like, and not even that, I don't even think kettlebells were much of the things I, for some reason, I was kind of able to focus, like, my stance on kettlebells, because it was never that heavy, but things were, they, you know, they want you to do, like, uh...
01:45:14.000 You know, like Cleans or like Snatch.
01:45:18.000 And then they show you the form for 20 minutes and then they go, now as fast as you can for 8 minutes. 0.97
01:45:22.000 And the best guy's done this and you don't want to be a loser like that guy.
01:45:25.000 So, you know, be as good as this.
01:45:27.000 You know, try to do it fast.
01:45:29.000 How many people drop those weights in their head?
01:45:31.000 The form is just sacrificed.
01:45:33.000 How many people do you see drop weights in their head?
01:45:35.000 Actually, all the injuries I saw were people missing box jumps.
01:45:38.000 That's when people get hurt the most.
01:45:39.000 Their shins get busted up on those wooden boards.
01:45:42.000 Well, you know, that's probably the easiest to fix. 0.67
01:45:46.000 That's just a cut and a bruise.
01:45:47.000 The real hard stuff to fix is the back stuff.
01:45:50.000 You know, when you start doing powerlifting in, like, large repetition movements, you know, trying to do 50 clean and presses, yeah, you lose, you know, the most important thing with powerlifting, the most important thing is proper form.
01:46:02.000 It's the most important thing by far.
01:46:04.000 And you should never abandon that, ever.
01:46:07.000 And that's, like, one of the things that people criticize CrossFit for.
01:46:10.000 Steve Maxwell, who's a good friend of mine, who's a fantastic trainer, probably one of the most knowledgeable people I've ever met when it comes to, like, fitness training, he's like, He's always on top of like the latest modalities and different techniques and stuff like that.
01:46:23.000 He hates it.
01:46:24.000 He thinks that you should exercise.
01:46:26.000 Yeah, I can see that.
01:46:28.000 I give it its due because like with minimal...
01:46:31.000 It's hard work.
01:46:31.000 Right now I diet much harder and I do more yoga than I would say I do like, you know, heavyweight training.
01:46:38.000 I try to do more stuff like that, you know what I mean?
01:46:39.000 Like cardio and stuff.
01:46:40.000 There's Hickson.
01:46:42.000 Yeah, that's insane.
01:46:43.000 Watch the video, though.
01:46:44.000 It's insane. 1.00
01:46:45.000 Watch him work out on the beach, because it's fucking ridiculous. 1.00
01:46:47.000 He does pistol squats. 0.98
01:46:48.000 This is all different things he's doing, but you've got to see the gymnastics in Santa Monica.
01:46:54.000 That's a totally different video.
01:46:55.000 He's dressed like Channing Tatum in Foxcatcher. 0.89
01:46:58.000 It's a little gay. 0.99
01:46:59.000 This is from Choke. 0.97
01:47:01.000 This is a different one.
01:47:03.000 It's different footage.
01:47:05.000 It's him on the balance bar in Santa Monica Beach. 0.99
01:47:08.000 He's doing that kind of shit, but he's doing it while he's walking on a balance bar. 1.00
01:47:11.000 It's nuts. 1.00
01:47:12.000 And also those kind of like applied like muscle skills are great.
01:47:17.000 Like American Ninja Warrior, that's such a cool show.
01:47:20.000 What?
01:47:20.000 You don't think any of that's neat?
01:47:23.000 You went from Hicks and Gracie to American Ninja Warrior Show.
01:47:26.000 Such a cool show.
01:47:27.000 No, but I'm saying just the idea that you could like...
01:47:31.000 Like, the concept of hanging off the side of a building terrifies me, because there's no chance I'll pull myself up.
01:47:36.000 Right. 0.97
01:47:36.000 If I catch a ledge by my fingertips, and the fact those guys can, you know, ascend on their fingertips is fucking bonkers. 0.97
01:47:45.000 Those free climbers are fucking spooky. 0.95
01:47:47.000 What those guys are doing, like that dude we had on, Alex Honnold, the guy who goes up the side of mountains, like, backwards. 0.99
01:47:53.000 That guy's insane. 0.96
01:47:55.000 He's insane. 0.99
01:47:56.000 Have you ever done parkour?
01:47:59.000 Yeah.
01:47:59.000 Parkour?
01:48:00.000 It's a good way to break your neck.
01:48:01.000 Did you ever see the Russian guys who go on the cranes and just do like chin-ups? 1.00
01:48:04.000 We've played every one of those.
01:48:05.000 It makes my legs quiver watching the videos.
01:48:08.000 Yeah, my feet go numb.
01:48:10.000 I couldn't even imagine trying to do that.
01:48:12.000 Your whole body starts shaking, just watching them.
01:48:14.000 I saw this video the other day of this guy that goes out on this ledge of this hotel, like super high up, and he just starts jumping from one like patio, like Had that like this little part on it just from one to another.
01:48:27.000 You're talking about that new cell phone video?
01:48:28.000 Is that it?
01:48:29.000 Yeah, it's for the Samsung Galaxy, is it Galaxy Note or Galaxy S6? Is it Neil Brennan doing the jumps?
01:48:36.000 Neil Brennan's a fucking parkour master. 0.99
01:48:38.000 Yeah, the guy like he straps the video camera, he straps the camera on him and then turns the video on and then jumps from like building to building but it might be bullshit. 1.00
01:48:46.000 It might be CGI'd. 0.99
01:48:48.000 I'm not exactly sure because he's doing some fucking insane jumps. 0.63
01:48:51.000 I'm not exactly sure if he's really doing those jumps. 0.98
01:48:54.000 Parkour fuckups are fantastic. 0.75
01:48:56.000 Oh, no, no, no, that's not... 0.95
01:48:58.000 You ever seen this?
01:48:58.000 No, I've seen this, yeah.
01:49:00.000 Look at this.
01:49:00.000 This is an edge camera video.
01:49:02.000 Look at this fucking guy, man. 1.00
01:49:04.000 I mean, it seems real. 1.00
01:49:06.000 This is the one I'm talking about right here.
01:49:07.000 Look at this.
01:49:11.000 Takes a photo of their food. 1.00
01:49:14.000 Guys jumping off of buildings and shit and taking photos of food. 0.99
01:49:17.000 But would you jump... 0.99
01:49:20.000 You could definitely jump, you know, four feet.
01:49:23.000 If it were the run, you could definitely jump four feet, without a doubt.
01:49:26.000 Jump from four feet or four feet in the air?
01:49:28.000 No, I'm saying you could jump a distance of four feet, you know, for a fact.
01:49:32.000 You could absolutely do that.
01:49:33.000 I wouldn't jump four feet from building to building.
01:49:37.000 I mean, there's definitely an amount of money, I guess, that I would do that for, I suppose, but I mean, like, I would still be...
01:49:47.000 Emotionally panicked, like going to do it, even if I know, even though I know I can jump, you know, significantly further, I'm sure.
01:49:54.000 Like, I'm thinking of four feet.
01:49:55.000 How many feet wide do you think this table is?
01:49:57.000 Three?
01:49:58.000 What do you think this is?
01:49:59.000 No, more, right?
01:49:59.000 No, that's more than three, yeah.
01:50:01.000 What is this?
01:50:02.000 Four feet wide?
01:50:03.000 Yeah.
01:50:03.000 Yeah, see, I could definitely jump over that.
01:50:05.000 With a run and everything like that?
01:50:07.000 Even just standing there, I could definitely jump over that, but...
01:50:07.000 Of course.
01:50:11.000 If below was like a hundred stories.
01:50:13.000 Yeah, that's what I mean.
01:50:15.000 My hands are sweating, dude.
01:50:16.000 I just said that and my hands started sweating.
01:50:18.000 Well, because I'd have to assume.
01:50:22.000 I have to assume.
01:50:24.000 This video will make you faint.
01:50:24.000 What is that, Brian?
01:50:26.000 And I gave it to Jamie.
01:50:28.000 No, but this is the one I'm talking about.
01:50:28.000 Don't make me faint.
01:50:29.000 Look how high that is.
01:50:30.000 And he just starts jumping from one corner to one corner.
01:50:34.000 And at the end, he has to stop.
01:50:36.000 Do you have that?
01:50:37.000 But you could, you know, have you ever in your, I guess probably if you're going really hard, but have you fallen off of a chin-up bar ever?
01:50:44.000 No.
01:50:45.000 And you still would not want to, like, take that?
01:50:47.000 No.
01:50:48.000 So you're confident in your pull-ups, and you wouldn't want to do it over those cranes.
01:50:52.000 Well, if you fell, you would just land on your feet.
01:50:54.000 Sure.
01:50:55.000 Oh, my God.
01:50:55.000 Here it is.
01:50:55.000 Check this out.
01:50:56.000 No, he's not doing this.
01:50:58.000 What is he doing?
01:50:58.000 Is there sound to this?
01:50:59.000 Oh, my God.
01:51:00.000 Watch this.
01:51:01.000 Oh, watch this. 1.00
01:51:02.000 This is fucked up. 1.00
01:51:06.000 Oh my god. 1.00
01:51:08.000 Oh my god.
01:51:09.000 He has to stop at the end.
01:51:10.000 Oh my god.
01:51:14.000 Dude, look.
01:51:15.000 They're dripping.
01:51:16.000 My hands are dripping.
01:51:17.000 I should feel my hands. 0.98
01:51:19.000 They're fucking soaking wet right now. 0.95
01:51:21.000 Yeah, it's real anxiety. 0.95
01:51:22.000 And it's just for a guy you don't know or anything, just the fact that...
01:51:25.000 That guy's out of his mind. 1.00
01:51:27.000 The fuck is he doing? 1.00
01:51:28.000 Look how far up it is! 1.00
01:51:31.000 How much would someone have to pay you, Brian, to do this?
01:51:33.000 Never, never.
01:51:34.000 Nope.
01:51:35.000 I would faint.
01:51:36.000 Yeah, this there's no amount of money for.
01:51:38.000 No. 1.00
01:51:38.000 I would suck dicks before doing it. 1.00
01:51:40.000 I don't think I have that much faith in my coordination. 1.00
01:51:42.000 Would you suck dicks before doing that? 1.00
01:51:44.000 Probably, yes. 1.00
01:51:44.000 Yeah. 1.00
01:51:45.000 How many dicks? 1.00
01:51:46.000 As many as they want, you know? 1.00
01:51:48.000 Yeah, I'm not doing that, because you can't die sucking a dick. 1.00
01:51:51.000 You would know halfway through the dick, this dick is spoiled. 1.00
01:51:54.000 Right. 1.00
01:51:57.000 The dick's going bad. 1.00
01:51:58.000 I can't suck this dick. 1.00
01:51:58.000 I'm sorry, sir. 1.00
01:51:59.000 Do you have an expiration date on this dick? 1.00
01:52:02.000 Because I am not going to get trichinosis from your dick, sir. 1.00
01:52:04.000 You've got to look under his nuts for a stamp. 1.00
01:52:06.000 A date stamp. 1.00
01:52:07.000 Stop getting fucking Guardia from your dick. 1.00
01:52:11.000 I'm not dying. 1.00
01:52:12.000 I wonder if transgenders that have fake pussies, if they feel like they can't get a period, that they're like, oh, only if I could get a period. 1.00
01:52:19.000 Oh, yeah, for sure. 1.00
01:52:19.000 There'll always be something else, is what I'm saying. 1.00
01:52:20.000 I don't think I'm going to super throw with it.
01:52:21.000 And also, there's that weird thing.
01:52:23.000 It's because it does end up being... 0.99
01:52:26.000 Made where the dick was. 1.00
01:52:27.000 So it's also an oddly placed vagina usually also. 1.00
01:52:31.000 It's kind of like high up. 0.98
01:52:32.000 Right. 0.99
01:52:32.000 It's where the dick hole. 0.99
01:52:33.000 I've seen one in real life. 0.99
01:52:35.000 Do you think they put just like ketchup packets in there and they squeeze just to make it feel like, you know, like...
01:52:39.000 I think they'd probably pretend...
01:52:41.000 Here's Hickson on the balance beam.
01:52:42.000 As crazy as that sounds...
01:52:43.000 As crazy as that sounds, but they do that, but I mean like...
01:52:43.000 Look at this.
01:52:46.000 Like, you know, girls who want to become men wear a fucking fake dick all day. 1.00
01:52:50.000 Yeah, look at this. 1.00
01:52:51.000 Yeah, that is true.
01:52:52.000 There's a lot of girls who do do that. 1.00
01:52:57.000 Exploding blood packs in their vagina. 1.00
01:53:00.000 Those things you'd think you'd want to be a vampire when you were a kid. 1.00
01:53:02.000 Look at this fucking balance this guy has. 0.99
01:53:04.000 He just sat down on it. 1.00
01:53:06.000 He's putting his foot down.
01:53:07.000 And then watch, he's going to stand up from here.
01:53:08.000 I like that he's working for it, though, too.
01:53:10.000 But watch this. 0.99
01:53:11.000 But it's because he's standing up on one leg from his ass down. 0.98
01:53:14.000 That's also like a rounded pole, it looks like, you know? 0.98
01:53:16.000 No, that's flat on top, dude. 1.00
01:53:18.000 But your balls, though. 1.00
01:53:19.000 No, watch how he does this, though. 1.00
01:53:20.000 This is insane.
01:53:22.000 That's crazy.
01:53:23.000 He stands up, and then once he gets all the way to the top, then he does a split.
01:53:26.000 He grabs his foot.
01:53:28.000 It's crazy. 1.00
01:53:29.000 His fucking balance is amazing. 0.99
01:53:32.000 And that was one of the reasons why he was so good. 0.99
01:53:36.000 He had a combination of everything. 0.99
01:53:38.000 Get the fuck out of here, man. 0.99
01:53:38.000 Look at that. 0.99
01:53:40.000 That dude's doing a split. 1.00
01:53:42.000 Look at this shit. 1.00
01:53:43.000 Standing on a balance beam. 1.00
01:53:45.000 That's like the ultimate control of your body right there.
01:53:48.000 If you can do that, you could basically do anything.
01:53:51.000 He's the greatest jiu-jitsu fighter of all time, too.
01:53:53.000 Like, widely recognized by almost everybody ever as being the greatest.
01:53:57.000 Hicks and Gracie?
01:53:58.000 Yeah, I don't think it's a coincidence that it's also he can do ridiculous things with his body that, like, I bet LeBron James can't do that.
01:54:05.000 I bet Kobe Bryant can't do that.
01:54:07.000 You know, I bet what he can do that's a very unusual...
01:54:10.000 But I wouldn't bet, uh, GSP could probably do that, I think.
01:54:14.000 Things similar, too.
01:54:14.000 Maybe.
01:54:15.000 Close.
01:54:16.000 Yeah, George is a pretty amazing athlete.
01:54:18.000 He does that thing where he does those broad jumps up on those little ledges, you know, in between them, and he goes up, and I mean, that's like...
01:54:24.000 Yeah.
01:54:24.000 Well, he's also very flexible, too.
01:54:26.000 That's a big flexibility move.
01:54:27.000 You have to be really flexible just to be able to hold your leg up there like that.
01:54:31.000 You know, George is pretty flexible.
01:54:33.000 Did you see the Pacquiao-Mayweather fight?
01:54:35.000 Did you watch that?
01:54:36.000 Yeah.
01:54:37.000 What did you think?
01:54:38.000 We talked about it.
01:54:40.000 It's just boring.
01:54:41.000 I know we talked about it.
01:54:42.000 You said you liked it, yeah.
01:54:44.000 But I think that most people were disappointed, right?
01:54:47.000 I just was bored.
01:54:49.000 I called it very easily from the beginning.
01:54:52.000 I can't believe I asked you.
01:54:53.000 We already talked about it.
01:54:54.000 It seems like that UFC, MMA has really spoiled boxing for me because I just, I mean, it's not like Mike Tyson days, it wasn't exciting like that where, you know, it was...
01:55:04.000 Yeah, but it's not gonna be.
01:55:05.000 But that was the best of their best.
01:55:07.000 That's the best boxers right now.
01:55:10.000 And if that's your best, why are we watching a hundred bucks?
01:55:13.000 That's twice as much as UFC. I think the UFC is 60 now or something like that.
01:55:19.000 It's a million fights.
01:55:21.000 Over the course of the night you get free fights. 0.99
01:55:25.000 But don't you think, like everybody says, fuck this, I'll never watch boxing again. 1.00
01:55:28.000 I think that's bullshit. 1.00
01:55:29.000 I think they will. 1.00
01:55:30.000 I'll still watch it, but I'm not going to pay a hundred bucks ever.
01:55:32.000 But who's going to be a real star?
01:55:34.000 Who's going to tear through Again, like a Tyson.
01:55:38.000 That's what you need.
01:55:39.000 You need somebody with that kind of vicious, like, knockouts. 1.00
01:55:42.000 You need to bring excitement back to it.
01:55:43.000 One thing...
01:55:45.000 There was excitement around this fight, but I never fully understood why.
01:55:48.000 I really was like...
01:55:49.000 I think I called that from the second they announced the fight.
01:55:51.000 I go, Mayweather wins by decision.
01:55:53.000 What about Canelo Alvarez?
01:55:55.000 I'm not familiar with him. 1.00
01:55:56.000 He's a bad motherfucker. 1.00
01:55:57.000 He's fighting next week. 1.00
01:55:58.000 He's fighting this upcoming Saturday.
01:55:59.000 They're gonna show the rematch of the Floyd Mayweather fight on HBO, and then he's gonna fight.
01:56:03.000 Saturday or Friday?
01:56:04.000 I'd rather watch UFC from Australia, right?
01:56:04.000 I don't know.
01:56:08.000 The last good boxing match I watched was Chris Algieri beating the Russian. 0.95
01:56:14.000 Provodnikov? 0.69
01:56:15.000 Yeah.
01:56:16.000 That was a fun fight to watch.
01:56:17.000 Did you see Lucas Matisse versus Provodnikov?
01:56:20.000 Provodnikov and Matisse go to a war for 12 rounds.
01:56:20.000 No.
01:56:24.000 It's fucking crazy. 0.99
01:56:25.000 I mean, it was a crazy fight. 0.99
01:56:28.000 That's like the kind of fight that everybody wanted from Pacquiao and Mayweather.
01:56:32.000 Like, just show a couple, just a few minutes.
01:56:35.000 Show highlights of the Matisse-Provodnikov fight.
01:56:39.000 This fight was like some crazy Rock'em Sock'em robots, Rocky V. Like, it was a movie fight.
01:56:46.000 In all of UFC and boxing, or MMA and boxing for me, I'd say one of my top five fights of all time is boxing.
01:56:55.000 Diego Corrales versus...
01:56:57.000 What was his name?
01:57:00.000 It was one of those three names, I believe.
01:57:03.000 I know who you're talking about.
01:57:04.000 Jonathan Taylor Thomas.
01:57:05.000 Jonathan Taylor Thomas.
01:57:07.000 He got pissed at the world.
01:57:10.000 JTT was getting wobbly towards the 7th.
01:57:13.000 I know what you're talking about, though.
01:57:15.000 I mean, they fought in a phone booth, they said, you know, for...
01:57:18.000 It was insane.
01:57:19.000 And, you know, it was back-and-forth knockouts.
01:57:22.000 Kind of like that Pat Berry-Chick-Congo thing. 0.98
01:57:24.000 Yeah, this is these two guys fighting.
01:57:26.000 I mean, this is Provodnikov and Matisse.
01:57:28.000 It was a crazy fight.
01:57:29.000 They smashed heads. 0.98
01:57:31.000 Right there, but this like this was like one if you want to watch like a blood and guts fight Like everybody wanted the Mayweather fight to be you got to watch this fight because it was fucking incredible Jesus I mean these guys just back and forth beat the fuck out of each other Provodnikov takes a punch better than any living human that's ever walked the face of this fucking planet When he's done he looks like a like an Asian like dry cleaner lady He really does he's always stretched out his face is bizarre He looks like they pulled him out of like a woolly mammoth 0.97
01:58:01.000 Tusk in the middle of the fucking Himalayas or some shit. 1.00
01:58:05.000 He's such a stud though So it's like a fucking animal as a fighter and he they did a Took photos of his drug test after the fight and his urine was black I mean black. 1.00
01:58:19.000 Like Coke. 0.99
01:58:19.000 It's from blood. 0.99
01:58:20.000 Like Coca-Cola. 0.84
01:58:21.000 That's what his piss looked like from this fight because this fight was so crazy. 0.70
01:58:25.000 I mean, it was just like one of the nuttiest fights I've ever seen in my life.
01:58:28.000 And that was the kind of fight that Jose Luis Castillo, right?
01:58:32.000 Wasn't that who it was?
01:58:33.000 Yeah.
01:58:34.000 Diego Corrales.
01:58:35.000 Jose Luis Castillo.
01:58:35.000 Yeah.
01:58:36.000 That's it.
01:58:36.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:58:37.000 And they went back and forth.
01:58:38.000 Just back and forth nailing each other.
01:58:40.000 It was so good. 1.00
01:58:41.000 God damn. 1.00
01:58:42.000 Yeah, he had some great fucking fights. 1.00
01:58:43.000 And then Diego Corrales died not crazy long after that. 0.99
01:58:46.000 He died in a motorcycle accident.
01:58:47.000 Yeah.
01:58:47.000 Yeah, he was a wild dude.
01:58:50.000 You know, those wild dudes just fucking... 0.98
01:58:54.000 But then they'll make the movie of his life, and he'll be like, I was just starting my charity work. 0.99
01:59:00.000 You know, I'm done.
01:59:02.000 I'm done with this crazy fight game.
01:59:03.000 I'm going to preserve my family.
01:59:05.000 Stop cheating on my lady.
01:59:06.000 What I'm going to do right now is I'm going to help the little kids coming up.
01:59:10.000 And then it'll be some kid drinking, laughing, and he turns a corner and smashes into him.
01:59:17.000 I know there's a lot of people that complain about the end of, uh, you know, that guy's being dragged over the coals now.
01:59:23.000 He's dead now, but the Chris, the American Sniper guy?
01:59:26.000 Chris Kyle.
01:59:27.000 But it's like the same thing.
01:59:28.000 It was like, I'm gonna go help this wacky guy out.
01:59:30.000 She's like, you shouldn't do it.
01:59:31.000 He goes, hey, everyone deserves help.
01:59:34.000 And it's like, you know, he never came home that day. 1.00
01:59:36.000 I bet he was just like, you know, probably all, you know, he's like, fuck you, bitch. 1.00
01:59:40.000 Fucking cunt. 1.00
01:59:40.000 Well, now I have to leave, you fucking cunt. 1.00
01:59:42.000 That's why I asked for breakfast to be done an hour ago when I got in the shower, you twat. 1.00
01:59:47.000 I'll be back at 7, you fucking dumb whore. 1.00
01:59:49.000 Change your attitude before I get back. 1.00
01:59:51.000 Dead. 0.99
01:59:53.000 Oh, God.
01:59:54.000 You never know, man.
01:59:55.000 You're watching a movie about someone's life. 0.99
01:59:57.000 Most of the shit they're saying, they just did not say. 0.98
02:00:00.000 Do you try to not leave town or hang up on it? 0.99
02:00:03.000 I always say with, I think, any girlfriend I've ever had, Or if it's like, let me not leave town getting on a plane while we're in a fight.
02:00:12.000 I've thrown that all away.
02:00:13.000 I will absolutely get on a plane. 0.99
02:00:15.000 And then while I'm on the plane, I'm like, if this plane goes down, it's going to fucking ruin the rest of her life. 1.00
02:00:19.000 Fuck her. 1.00
02:00:21.000 That's so crazy. 1.00
02:00:22.000 So, this Baltimore thing, what did they do to this guy?
02:00:29.000 The catalyst, you mean?
02:00:31.000 He died in a police van, right?
02:00:33.000 Yeah.
02:00:35.000 They injured his neck, right?
02:00:38.000 Like a spinal cord failure, right?
02:00:40.000 Yeah.
02:00:41.000 But I had read from a very non-credible source that he was already injured.
02:00:51.000 It's not true.
02:00:52.000 It's not true.
02:00:52.000 So he died from an injury he sustained.
02:00:55.000 So all the stuff that everybody had said about it being all the rumors. 1.00
02:00:59.000 Those motherfuckers with their fake stories. 1.00
02:01:02.000 They're so dangerous. 1.00
02:01:03.000 He had a broken heart.
02:01:04.000 The best part of that was hearing other guys that were in the van, too.
02:01:08.000 Like the other criminals.
02:01:10.000 Alleged criminals that were in the van with them like giving their account of it was always great Because it goes why come him hurt himself?
02:01:21.000 Of course the cops did he can't hurts himself like that.
02:01:25.000 Yeah, that's not the guy you want himself NBC news comm says disputed report And then, Freddie Gray hurt himself in police van?
02:01:37.000 That is not journalism.
02:01:39.000 You shouldn't be able to do that.
02:01:41.000 You shouldn't be able to say, disputed report, and then the title, Freddie Gray hurt himself in police van?
02:01:49.000 You're just getting off the hook. 0.98
02:01:51.000 You haven't done the fucking work, and you're trying to get the story out, and you're trying to get clicks before you've done the work. 1.00
02:01:55.000 You don't know if that's a story, you fuck. 1.00
02:01:57.000 You can't do that. 1.00
02:01:59.000 Like, that's sneaky shit for NBCnews.com. 1.00
02:02:02.000 That's really sneaky shit. 1.00
02:02:03.000 Because that's not a story. 0.99
02:02:05.000 You know what that is?
02:02:07.000 Disputed report on a news site? 0.99
02:02:08.000 How about you do some fucking journalism? 0.99
02:02:10.000 How about you follow up? 0.99
02:02:12.000 Make an actual report?
02:02:13.000 What you're doing is, if you say something like that, people like me just read the headline and start repeating it.
02:02:13.000 Yeah!
02:02:19.000 I heard he hurt himself in the van.
02:02:21.000 I already tried to hurt himself in the van. 1.00
02:02:23.000 The fucking guy hurt himself in the van, okay? 1.00
02:02:27.000 And they're burning down the dry cleaners. 1.00
02:02:29.000 The best example of how easy that shit goes is... 0.99
02:02:35.000 Wasn't there a comic at one point that was accused of something and everyone just says he did it? 0.99
02:02:41.000 I can't remember his name.
02:02:41.000 Who?
02:02:42.000 Bill Cosme?
02:02:43.000 Yeah, no.
02:02:44.000 No, it was a comic...
02:02:45.000 Who Lives Out Here, I think.
02:02:47.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:02:48.000 Yeah.
02:02:49.000 But, uh...
02:02:51.000 Terrible examples?
02:02:52.000 Yeah.
02:02:53.000 Let's keep moving.
02:02:55.000 Okay.
02:02:55.000 Let's do another one.
02:02:57.000 Did you hear about this fucking kid in L.A.? How about Duke Lacrosse? 0.99
02:03:00.000 That's a great example.
02:03:01.000 Did you hear about the kid in L.A. that got shot by the cops?
02:03:02.000 A 13-year-old kid or a 19-year-old kid that got shot.
02:03:05.000 He was crying for his mom. 1.00
02:03:06.000 Unarmed, crying for his mommy before he fucking died. 1.00
02:03:09.000 Unarmed. 1.00
02:03:10.000 The cops thought he had a gun, shot him through a fucking screen window. 1.00
02:03:13.000 They saw him. 1.00
02:03:14.000 He's standing there.
02:03:15.000 He's got a gun! 1.00
02:03:16.000 They just shoot him. 1.00
02:03:16.000 Bang! 1.00
02:03:17.000 It wasn't doing anything.
02:03:18.000 It wasn't a criminal at all.
02:03:20.000 Total accidental death from some incompetent person that happened to be a police officer.
02:03:25.000 And now this, you know... 1.00
02:03:26.000 Well, idiots can become police officers. 1.00
02:03:28.000 But my point was... 1.00
02:03:29.000 That Duke Lacrosse thing is a good example.
02:03:30.000 Because people still use that as an example of, like, a rapey situation.
02:03:34.000 Like, the Duke Lacrosse team...
02:03:35.000 Didn't happen.
02:03:36.000 Yeah, didn't happen.
02:03:37.000 And they're always kind of like...
02:03:39.000 People still say that.
02:03:40.000 Well, people are terrified of fraternities actually doing something like that.
02:03:45.000 So the Duke Lacrosse case is just one of those.
02:03:47.000 But like the UVA, the University of Virginia thing, that Rolling Stone printed this huge article about, never happened. 0.99
02:03:53.000 They just did shit journalism. 0.99
02:03:55.000 They failed at every level when it comes to journalism. 1.00
02:03:57.000 And this is goddamn Rolling Stone. 0.97
02:03:59.000 But because it's such a sensitive subject and people are really sensitive about calling out someone that may have actually been a victim, like being wrong, Sure, sure, sure. 0.97
02:04:08.000 And saying, you weren't a victim, and it turns out they were.
02:04:11.000 People are so terrified of that, that they actually skirt away from the real journalism.
02:04:15.000 You know, and that's what's happened.
02:04:17.000 Yeah, exactly.
02:04:17.000 You don't want to get, like...
02:04:18.000 You don't want to get in trouble.
02:04:19.000 Because if they're right...
02:04:20.000 Yeah.
02:04:21.000 Yeah, but you know that thing, the Duke lacrosse case?
02:04:23.000 That was one of Nancy Grace's pets. 0.99
02:04:26.000 Those boys raped that girl! 1.00
02:04:29.000 They took that girl and did terrible things! 0.99
02:04:33.000 I mean, she never apologized to that.
02:04:34.000 I mean, she was flat-out accusing them of that on television.
02:04:38.000 You know, it's kind of the same thing.
02:04:40.000 It's not journalism.
02:04:41.000 The story's not done.
02:04:43.000 You don't know. 0.98
02:04:44.000 Unless you were there, you gotta fucking get all your ducks in a row. 0.98
02:04:48.000 And even then, man, people lie. 0.99
02:04:50.000 There's a lot of weird shit going on. 0.99
02:04:52.000 Whenever there's a story... 0.99
02:04:54.000 And then there's two different sides of that story.
02:04:56.000 Boy, this gets tricky.
02:04:58.000 Trying to figure out who's telling the truth and who's not telling the truth and what is what. 1.00
02:05:02.000 Like, fuck, man. 0.99
02:05:03.000 Especially when it's just like two, it's like the only witnesses of the groups that were there, you know? 1.00
02:05:07.000 Yeah. 0.97
02:05:09.000 Those behind closed doors accusations are fucking, that's so, man, never want to be on those juries. 1.00
02:05:15.000 Yeah, no shit. 1.00
02:05:16.000 And it's also, it's weird, the difference in, like, the stories that catch. 0.99
02:05:22.000 You know, there's stories that catch fire, and then everybody wants to walk in the street and protest.
02:05:27.000 Like, this kid in LA, this is not catching fire.
02:05:30.000 For whatever reason, you're barely hearing about this.
02:05:32.000 Baltimore's burning down.
02:05:33.000 Yeah, Baltimore is burning down, and the guy who was in police custody is an admitted criminal, right?
02:05:40.000 Like, everybody's kind of admitting that this guy has done crimes before.
02:05:43.000 And this is just simply a police brutality issue.
02:05:47.000 But this kid who got shot in L.A. isn't even a criminal.
02:05:51.000 He's just a kid.
02:05:52.000 It was just a mistake.
02:05:54.000 Like, that's terrifying to me. 0.95
02:05:56.000 They're just willing to shoot that 12-year-old boy in Cleveland.
02:05:59.000 The guy gets out of the car.
02:06:01.000 A cop who was taken off of a different police squad because he was dangerous. 0.96
02:06:06.000 Because they were like, you gotta get the fuck out of here. 1.00
02:06:09.000 They kicked him off and another department hires this fucking guy. 1.00
02:06:12.000 He gets out of a car. 1.00
02:06:14.000 In two seconds, he's shooting at a 12-year-old with a gun. 0.99
02:06:17.000 And not saying that being a cop isn't a fucking insanely difficult job. 0.98
02:06:21.000 And not saying that... 0.97
02:06:22.000 I've said many times, I don't think anybody can do it right.
02:06:24.000 I think it's just way too much stress and way too much pressure.
02:06:27.000 But my point is, how weird is it that some stories catch and some stories don't?
02:06:32.000 Like some stories, they just...
02:06:34.000 They just slip right by.
02:06:35.000 You hear about the guy getting shot by the cops and there's no protest and everything.
02:06:38.000 It just becomes another story.
02:06:40.000 It just becomes another statistic.
02:06:41.000 And then Freddie Gray.
02:06:42.000 Boom! 0.99
02:06:43.000 Or that kid in Ferguson.
02:06:45.000 Boom! 0.99
02:06:46.000 Boom! 0.99
02:06:46.000 Michael Brown. 0.99
02:06:47.000 It just like catches. 0.99
02:06:48.000 And then the fucking protest gets crazy and everybody just goes nuts over it. 0.99
02:06:52.000 I would say Cleveland's not that kind of town, but it is. 0.99
02:06:54.000 Well, how about the South Carolina one, where the guy got shot?
02:06:56.000 They didn't riot.
02:06:58.000 That guy got shot in the back, man. 1.00
02:07:00.000 That guy got shot in the back, and there's a fucking video of it. 0.99
02:07:02.000 But there's no crazy riots like there are in Baltimore. 0.99
02:07:06.000 It's just...
02:07:07.000 It's mob mentality, man.
02:07:09.000 If you can get the mob to start calming each other down, it spreads that way.
02:07:15.000 Do you know what I mean?
02:07:16.000 Let's take this to the streets, peaceful...
02:07:18.000 But if...
02:07:19.000 If the controlling interest of people start going out there and just, like, kicking in cop car windows, that's the way it's going to go.
02:07:25.000 I found that, like, I didn't think there was anything good about that.
02:07:28.000 I thought that was terrifying.
02:07:30.000 Watching people, like, and again, if this was so much wrapped around, like, we're riding because we're pissed off, we're not going to take it anymore.
02:07:38.000 Like, high five.
02:07:39.000 You see people laughing. 1.00
02:07:41.000 Eating candy in the background while they're stomping on fucking cop cars and shit. 1.00
02:07:45.000 You know what? 1.00
02:07:45.000 It's such like a... 1.00
02:07:46.000 It really is terrifying.
02:07:48.000 It's a third world for a third world. 0.99
02:07:50.000 I think the cops leave those cars there.
02:07:51.000 I really do.
02:07:52.000 I think they leave those cars there as like something to take their anger out on.
02:07:56.000 Leave them a car...
02:07:57.000 No, but you know what?
02:07:58.000 I mean...
02:07:59.000 Like Blanca and Street Fighter?
02:08:02.000 You give them a cop car to destroy, and those cars are insured.
02:08:06.000 It's a bonus level.
02:08:07.000 And it gives them something to destroy.
02:08:09.000 And I really think that.
02:08:10.000 I really think that that's probably a strategy in a lot of ways. 0.95
02:08:13.000 Take a cop car, leave it in an area where you know that there's going to be some protests, and just let them fuck it up. 0.97
02:08:19.000 You know? 0.68
02:08:20.000 Baltimore Mayor gave those who wish to destroy space to do that.
02:08:24.000 She got in trouble for saying that, but...
02:08:26.000 Okay, but what she said, which she was criticized because they thought that she was actually giving the green light to go ahead and riot. 1.00
02:08:34.000 By a mayor not trying to calm people down, but instead by saying something like that, the interpretation was that what she did was she almost gave them like a license to go out and smash shit. 1.00
02:08:46.000 She's a black lady, yeah. 1.00
02:08:47.000 She's cute. 0.95
02:08:48.000 We gave those who wish to destroy space to do that as well.
02:08:52.000 Hmm. 0.98
02:08:53.000 She's black, right? 0.66
02:08:54.000 Yes. 0.73
02:08:55.000 Why do you keep having to bring that up, man?
02:08:57.000 Dude, I don't see color.
02:08:59.000 Because I feel bad she has to answer for so many things also.
02:09:03.000 Put that back.
02:09:03.000 Do you know what I mean?
02:09:04.000 Let me read that again.
02:09:05.000 Yeah, no, I hear it.
02:09:07.000 Listen to this quote though.
02:09:09.000 Because while trying to make sure that we are protected from the cars and other things that were going on, we gave those who wish to destroy space to do that as well.
02:09:17.000 And we worked very hard to keep that balance and to put ourselves in the best position to de-escalate.
02:09:23.000 That sounds to me that she's very pragmatic.
02:09:26.000 See, no, when I read it in context, what that sounds to me like she's a pragmatic woman, and what she did was she made a calculation and decided that these guys are going to destroy things, and maybe that was admitting that they left some cop cars there, too.
02:09:40.000 Smart move, right?
02:09:41.000 Take a loss for the greater good, maybe, you know. 1.00
02:09:43.000 But there's, I mean, the greater good, I mean, they burnt a lot of shit. 0.99
02:09:47.000 They smashed a lot of things. 0.99
02:09:48.000 A lot of cops got injured. 1.00
02:09:50.000 Fuck being a cop, man. 1.00
02:09:52.000 It's too hard. 1.00
02:09:53.000 This day and age, fuck that. 1.00
02:09:54.000 We need them, though. 1.00
02:09:55.000 That's what's crazy.
02:09:56.000 You know, I'm really I said it's one of things like who's gonna do it?
02:09:59.000 It's a certain it's a certain personality that's gonna go do it. 0.92
02:10:02.000 Yeah, and you know actually I mean There's I guess there's multiple personalities that can do it But a lot of times ends up being the same guy, you know It's it can you know and obviously the abusive people are when it becomes a problem But the really calm people they're super valuable Super valuable asset to the community if you have a really good calm cop who actually can deal with shit Good luck finding one of those.
02:10:26.000 Good luck being that guy, too. 0.97
02:10:27.000 It's a hard road, and you're not gonna get nearly the respect that you feel like you deserve for putting your fucking life on the line on a daily basis. 0.99
02:10:33.000 Breaking up family disputes and stopping crime and break-ins and fucking carjackings and all kinds of crazy shit you have to deal with. 0.99
02:10:42.000 Everybody's lying to you. 0.99
02:10:43.000 Some of the worst things, though, is when a cop really does buddy up to you and starts, like, opening up his...
02:10:43.000 I mean...
02:11:03.000 I've heard him say, uh...
02:11:06.000 One guy was bragging to me that he's never had...
02:11:08.000 I was smoking weed in his presence.
02:11:12.000 And he was like, yeah, I wish I could smoke again, man, but they just test us all the time.
02:11:15.000 He goes, but you can check my arrest records, man.
02:11:17.000 I've never arrested anyone for weed, never arrested anyone for a DUI. And I was like, what?
02:11:23.000 I'm like...
02:11:24.000 No, man.
02:11:25.000 You have to immerse every DUI. Yeah, exactly.
02:11:28.000 You're trying to make some correlation to me.
02:11:30.000 I saw a guy drunk on the road the other night, pretty sure drunk, thinking of whether or not I should call him in.
02:11:35.000 So I got beside him in the lane, backed up, and stayed behind him, watched him weave in and out of the lane.
02:11:41.000 I couldn't tell if he was drunk or he was tired, because he would keep it up for a while, and then he would drift, and then he'd come back in and keep it up, and then he was good. 0.99
02:11:48.000 It was hard to tell, but it was disturbing as fuck. 0.97
02:11:51.000 It's like all these cars are flying around going 70 miles an hour and this one guy is not fully in control. 0.98
02:11:56.000 I've had to call a few times just because every time I come home, it's that time.
02:12:00.000 The bars are closing.
02:12:02.000 And so once in a while, you just have to do it because you see how bad it is. 0.96
02:12:05.000 Like, all right, that's ridiculous. 0.84
02:12:06.000 I called in once. 0.87
02:12:08.000 Called in once, coming down the one-on-one. 0.99
02:12:09.000 Some fucking guy was just taking two, three lanes at a time. 0.99
02:12:13.000 Just go straight across and then back on, straight for a little bit, a little bit of wiggle. 1.00
02:12:18.000 Ooh, drift to the right.
02:12:19.000 Back on.
02:12:21.000 Straight, straight, straight. 1.00
02:12:22.000 I mean, he was fucked up. 0.99
02:12:24.000 And I knew that that guy was gonna crash, and I called the cops. 0.99
02:12:27.000 I don't know what happened.
02:12:28.000 Never saw it.
02:12:28.000 I did watch a guy.
02:12:29.000 I was going 70 miles an hour, and this guy fucking flew by me on the highway the other day. 1.00
02:12:35.000 And I was like, what the fuck? 0.99
02:12:39.000 I mean, dude, it was a crowded highway, and dude had to be going $1.20 easy. 0.99
02:12:43.000 Easy $1.20. 0.99
02:12:44.000 And then right behind him, the fucking cops were... 1.00
02:12:49.000 Racing him the entire time this asshole like thought he was like being Joe slick and driving fast with a Car behind him and that car was a cop car So they hit the lights and they're right behind him. 1.00
02:13:00.000 Oh my god He was driving so fast because I was watching this I was like this is not like an empty road on the way to Vegas There's no one in front of you and you're fucking listening to radar love. 0.99
02:13:09.000 This is this is the 101 in Hollywood You know at 730 at night very crowded road and this guy was fall lying It's so... 1.00
02:13:19.000 The science is in on that shit. 0.99
02:13:21.000 Do you know what I mean? 1.00
02:13:22.000 Like, those things, they end bad a lot.
02:13:24.000 Yeah, they do.
02:13:25.000 Car chases. 0.95
02:13:26.000 Car chases are fucking terrifying for cops, too. 0.99
02:13:28.000 Imagine if you're a cop and you plow onto someone and kill them while you're trying to get some bad guy. 0.99
02:13:32.000 But that happens. 0.99
02:13:33.000 Of course it happens. 0.99
02:13:34.000 You're fucking going 150 miles an hour, whatever the hell you're going, going around corners. 0.97
02:13:39.000 And how good exactly is their driving? 0.99
02:13:41.000 Did you ever see those videos of...
02:13:46.000 Cops getting hit by cars while they're like checking IDs and stuff.
02:13:50.000 Oh, yeah.
02:13:50.000 That's awful.
02:13:51.000 I mean where they stand for that is ridiculous almost. 0.51
02:13:53.000 Most of them don't do that anymore.
02:13:55.000 They stand on the other side.
02:13:56.000 They go on the other side.
02:13:57.000 But there's a danger issue.
02:14:00.000 You know, like when you're approaching cars, you got to see someone's hands.
02:14:03.000 You got to make sure that they don't have any weapons on them.
02:14:06.000 Every cop has to approach every car like this is the guy that might keep you from seeing your family again.
02:14:11.000 That's just a crazy job, man.
02:14:13.000 It's a crazy way to make a living.
02:14:15.000 It is a shame because those videos, that's why I said I've actually never had cops be very helpful to me or nice to me ever.
02:14:22.000 Ever?
02:14:23.000 Really?
02:14:24.000 Yeah, it's very weird.
02:14:25.000 Well, look at you. 1.00
02:14:26.000 You look like a fucking monster. 1.00
02:14:27.000 I mean, yeah. 1.00
02:14:28.000 Like a guy who's got a fucking torture basement. 1.00
02:14:31.000 Bring out the gimp. 1.00
02:14:32.000 What's under that carpet, Big J? Nothing, it's just carpet.
02:14:36.000 14 Filipino boys were pulled from a trunk in this man's basement.
02:14:39.000 Do you look like the dude from Pulp Fiction, the gimp? 1.00
02:14:41.000 Bring out the gimp, guys? 0.93
02:14:43.000 Bring out the gimp? 0.89
02:14:44.000 Yeah, you're one of the guys, right?
02:14:45.000 A grown man with long hair is like, hmm, you don't follow the rules, do you?
02:14:51.000 What else do you not follow the rules on, sir?
02:14:53.000 It's usually in a bun, which is I do play by the rules.
02:14:55.000 A bun?
02:14:56.000 Put it in a bun.
02:14:58.000 Well, that's the new rule.
02:14:59.000 You get a man thing, the top, like a pony?
02:15:03.000 Yeah.
02:15:03.000 And then I get on top of the girl pyramid.
02:15:05.000 Have you heard the newest trend for women is actually putting it in old lady hair bun and actually dyeing your hair gray. 1.00
02:15:12.000 People are dyeing their hair gray.
02:15:13.000 I met a girl dyeing their hair gray.
02:15:15.000 I'm not surprised. 1.00
02:15:15.000 That's so stupid. 1.00
02:15:16.000 Nose rings. 1.00
02:15:17.000 Looked weird.
02:15:18.000 And that's high pants, there's mom jean shorts. 0.99
02:15:20.000 Hair dye.
02:15:20.000 Yeah, you know, there's always gonna be something.
02:15:23.000 People are always exhausted with the options that are available, and they're just like, look, I just need something new.
02:15:28.000 I'm going gray! 1.00
02:15:29.000 Fuck it! 1.00
02:15:30.000 I'm going, I'm gonna fucking tattoo my face. 1.00
02:15:32.000 How about those guys on a, was that lock-up brawl or something, where they tattooed their eyes? 0.98
02:15:37.000 Oh, yeah, I've seen that.
02:15:38.000 They tattooed the whites of their eyes.
02:15:39.000 Women are choosing to dye their hair gray for the granny hair. 0.99
02:15:43.000 Well, if you're fucking hot as shit, like those girls, yeah, you can do that. 0.99
02:15:48.000 Now it's silver. 1.00
02:15:48.000 It's not even gray. 1.00
02:15:48.000 Who's gonna get mad? 1.00
02:15:50.000 Look how hot those girls are. 1.00
02:15:51.000 That's ridiculous. 1.00
02:15:52.000 They're so hot. 1.00
02:15:53.000 Who gives a fuck if they have gray hair? 1.00
02:15:54.000 You just shave your head. 1.00
02:15:55.000 You know, like I always say, like when someone say, do you think a girl's attractive? 0.69
02:15:59.000 There's a lot of girls that are undeniably attractive, but do they pass the shaved head no shirt test? 1.00
02:16:05.000 And if a girl passes the shaved head no shirt test, that's a ridiculously hot girl, right? 1.00
02:16:11.000 All these girls in this montage pass the shaved head no shirt test. 1.00
02:16:17.000 I like this.
02:16:17.000 I can't say I'm surprised.
02:16:19.000 Can't say I'm surprised that granny hair is in. 1.00
02:16:22.000 If they're hot, they're hot. 1.00
02:16:23.000 Who gives a fuck? 1.00
02:16:24.000 They have black eyelashes. 1.00
02:16:25.000 That's almost my point.
02:16:25.000 It's not even granny hair if they're that hot.
02:16:29.000 It doesn't take on that look.
02:16:30.000 Those girls, it's like they want to slow it down a little. 1.00
02:16:34.000 They're too hot.
02:16:35.000 You know, right?
02:16:36.000 Trying to put some roadblocks in the way?
02:16:38.000 Yeah, like, it's just too many dudes are hitting on me.
02:16:40.000 I'm going to take it down a notch.
02:16:42.000 I'm going to rip a tooth out. 1.00
02:16:43.000 I'm tired of sucking all this dick. 1.00
02:16:45.000 Yeah, it's just enough already. 1.00
02:16:46.000 I've got too many dicks coming my way. 0.99
02:16:48.000 Joe, did you see that episode of Workaholics that they talk about? 1.00
02:16:52.000 That was so fucking good. 0.97
02:16:53.000 I've never watched that show before. 0.98
02:16:54.000 It was hilarious.
02:16:56.000 Yeah, I didn't watch it.
02:16:57.000 I saw some of the clips online, but I didn't watch it.
02:16:59.000 How much of the show was dedicated to making fun of...
02:17:03.000 What happens is they eat peyote, and throughout the thing they're quoting you.
02:17:09.000 And then there's some silly quotes where they're like, no, Joe Rogan says we gotta trip on acid and do jiu-jitsu. 0.78
02:17:18.000 I laughed my ass off. 0.88
02:17:20.000 It's called Peyote-It Forward.
02:17:23.000 It's season 5, episode 12. I've watched it four times.
02:17:26.000 That's hilarious.
02:17:27.000 It's a funny show, man.
02:17:29.000 I just haven't had a chance to watch it.
02:17:30.000 I barely can keep up with Game of Thrones.
02:17:32.000 I don't have time to do anything, man.
02:17:34.000 I'm just too fucking busy these days.
02:17:36.000 We Seth Rogen all the time. 0.89
02:17:38.000 We need to Joe Rogen it once in a while.
02:17:41.000 That's hilarious.
02:17:42.000 That's hilarious.
02:17:43.000 That's an honor.
02:17:44.000 That's an honor.
02:17:45.000 That's really cool.
02:17:46.000 When I saw it online, I was like, wow, this is crazy.
02:17:49.000 It's funny.
02:17:49.000 I can go either way when you're referenced in a show.
02:17:52.000 I was talking to Artie Lang two weeks ago or something, and he told me that...
02:17:59.000 How he thought it was an honor, but he got referenced on Cleveland show one time, but the reference was, I guess the mom was buying food one day at a time.
02:18:08.000 He's like, nobody buys food one day at a time, except for Artie Lang.
02:18:12.000 I'm like, ah, it's kind of a weird way to have to...
02:18:13.000 It's a punchline. 0.98
02:18:14.000 Kind of calling you shitty, yeah. 1.00
02:18:16.000 Well, it's kind of saying you eat a lot, you fuck. 1.00
02:18:19.000 Yeah, um... 1.00
02:18:20.000 Fuck, what was I going to say? 1.00
02:18:21.000 Yeah, that show's a good show, man. 1.00
02:18:23.000 It's a funny fucking show. 0.99
02:18:24.000 It's really well written. 1.00
02:18:25.000 It was.
02:18:25.000 It was surprising because I never had watched it before.
02:18:28.000 Now, that in Broad City.
02:18:30.000 Have you ever watched that?
02:18:31.000 No.
02:18:32.000 There's too many good things, man.
02:18:34.000 I haven't seen Amy Schumer's show either.
02:18:35.000 I keep hearing really good things about Amy Schumer's show.
02:18:38.000 Have you seen it?
02:18:39.000 I've watched it.
02:18:40.000 The cool thing about Broad City, it's kind of like Sex and the City, but our generation. 1.00
02:18:44.000 And they just smoke weed and do gross shit. 0.99
02:18:48.000 How is that like Sex and the City at all? 1.00
02:18:50.000 It's...
02:18:50.000 Sex and the City is a girl show.
02:18:52.000 It's about two girls. 0.99
02:18:56.000 Sex and the Pig. 1.00
02:18:58.000 City for pigs. 1.00
02:18:59.000 Hannibal Barris. 0.99
02:19:01.000 He plays a guy in it that's a dentist.
02:19:05.000 I highly recommend it. 0.98
02:19:07.000 Damn, there's so many good shows now, man. 0.99
02:19:08.000 This is crazy. 1.00
02:19:10.000 Silicon Valley's fucking great. 0.99
02:19:11.000 I've missed a bunch of shows, and you can't go back. 0.98
02:19:14.000 There's too many now.
02:19:15.000 Because there's new ones coming out.
02:19:16.000 Yeah, if you're behind, if you, like, never watched all the Breaking Bad's, you can't just start with Better Call Saul. 1.00
02:19:21.000 You're fucked. 0.99
02:19:22.000 Yeah, I didn't watch Breaking Bad. 1.00
02:19:23.000 So, yeah, that's it.
02:19:24.000 I just don't know.
02:19:25.000 I watched the first season, and it was really good.
02:19:28.000 But I just got busy.
02:19:29.000 It's just a matter, just totally a matter of being busy.
02:19:31.000 I made it through Dexter, and that got really disappointing at the end.
02:19:34.000 I gave up on Dexter.
02:19:35.000 I finished it, and it's disappointing.
02:19:38.000 Super disappointing.
02:19:39.000 I've talked about this a hundred times. 0.99
02:19:41.000 When John Lithgow killed that chick in the bathtub and gave her a shitty rear-naked choke, he put her in a lame rear-naked choke. 1.00
02:19:48.000 I'm like, bitch, you are not choking anybody with that. 1.00
02:19:50.000 Fuck this show. 1.00
02:19:52.000 I literally... 1.00
02:19:54.000 Can you check them for the legitimacy of mixed martial arts moves? 0.99
02:19:58.000 It's like if you were doing a documentary on Jimi Hendrix and you're playing a fake guitar and you didn't really know what you were doing and I could tell you didn't know what you were doing, I'd go, fuck this documentary. 0.99
02:20:06.000 That's how I feel about John Lithgow and his shitty rear naked choke. 0.99
02:20:09.000 Plus, when you're choking somebody, they fight back. 0.99
02:20:12.000 They're trying to stay alive. 0.80
02:20:13.000 They're freaking the fuck out.
02:20:14.000 They don't just stay in place so you can do it. 0.75
02:20:16.000 They fight.
02:20:17.000 They kick their legs. 0.99
02:20:18.000 They fucking thrash You know, I don't want to typecast the man, 1.00
02:20:45.000 but the fuck out of here. 0.99
02:20:46.000 You didn't like him in that at all, that show? 0.99
02:20:48.000 No.
02:20:49.000 I really did like him in that.
02:20:49.000 Oh, wow.
02:20:51.000 He was my favorite season. 0.98
02:20:52.000 Couldn't get past the shitty jujitsu technique. 0.97
02:20:56.000 I can't believe that.
02:20:57.000 I wish they would redo it, like Star Wars, you know, who shot first or something, just to fix that scene for you.
02:21:03.000 Nope.
02:21:04.000 Nope.
02:21:05.000 No.
02:21:05.000 I mean, was he good other than that?
02:21:07.000 The show was already going downhill.
02:21:08.000 No, the show got shitty right from there, pretty much.
02:21:10.000 What happened?
02:21:11.000 It was so good at one point in time, but something happened and it just got really off the rails.
02:21:16.000 Every year they kept exposing, like, an end-of-series secret, and then when they get another season, they'd have to incorporate that into the store.
02:21:16.000 You know what?
02:21:24.000 Do you know what I mean?
02:21:25.000 So it was like, His sister was never supposed to find out he did that.
02:21:28.000 And then it was like multiple seasons of her knowing he was a skill.
02:21:31.000 You know what I mean?
02:21:32.000 They got over it very quick.
02:21:34.000 What?
02:21:34.000 She's a cop.
02:21:34.000 When they killed his...
02:21:35.000 I mean, spoiler alert.
02:21:36.000 When they killed his wife... 0.92
02:21:38.000 When he killed his wife, that's when I think a lot of people...
02:21:41.000 He killed his wife?
02:21:43.000 When John Lithgow killed his wife.
02:21:45.000 Killed his wife?
02:21:46.000 Really? 0.81
02:21:46.000 Yeah. 0.81
02:21:47.000 Oh, Jesus.
02:21:47.000 I didn't know that.
02:21:48.000 Oops.
02:21:49.000 Oof.
02:21:50.000 Oh, yeah, the ending of that... 0.99
02:21:51.000 There's a shitty rear naked chug. 1.00
02:21:53.000 Look, piss poor jujitsu technique, sir. 0.99
02:21:56.000 You're not even flexing.
02:21:58.000 He's not even flexing.
02:21:59.000 I just wish I had a bathtub that I could do that in.
02:22:02.000 That would be way easier.
02:22:04.000 It'd be way easier to get a bathtub to do that in than to do that. 0.99
02:22:07.000 If you do that, you have to kill somebody, okay? 0.97
02:22:09.000 Do you have a good bathtub? 1.00
02:22:10.000 Yeah, I'm sure you do.
02:22:11.000 Yeah, get a bathtub, son.
02:22:14.000 This is America.
02:22:15.000 Step up your bathtub game. 0.97
02:22:18.000 No one's ever said that.
02:22:19.000 Yes, they have.
02:22:20.000 Notorious freestyle from the movie.
02:22:22.000 Now, who played Biggie?
02:22:23.000 And how long did this come out?
02:22:24.000 It was good.
02:22:24.000 It was good.
02:22:25.000 It says 11. 2011?
02:22:27.000 It's a four-year-old movie?
02:22:27.000 Yeah.
02:22:28.000 Yeah.
02:22:29.000 It's been out for a long time.
02:22:29.000 Are we gonna hear his freestyle?
02:22:33.000 Oh, I'm gonna hear this.
02:22:34.000 The battle.
02:22:38.000 Whoa.
02:22:39.000 Whoa, they're angry with each other.
02:22:42.000 This is not even really happening.
02:22:43.000 This is how it starts.
02:22:46.000 Someone gets their neck broken and there's fires in the streets.
02:22:56.000 Hey DJ on the streets, just hand me a microphone in the middle of the street.
02:23:04.000 This is not Biggie for the listeners. 1.00
02:23:19.000 This is Biggie's friend who is talking shit to him. 0.99
02:23:24.000 It's a rap battle. 1.00
02:23:25.000 That's supposed to be Lil' Kim. 1.00
02:23:28.000 She's pretty. 0.99
02:23:29.000 Yeah.
02:23:30.000 And now Biggie takes the mic.
02:23:33.000 Let's hear what he has to say.
02:23:34.000 I assume it will be better.
02:23:50.000 We're good to go.
02:23:57.000 We're good to go.
02:23:59.000 We're good to go.
02:24:09.000 Even the guy who's pretending to be Biggie is awesome.
02:24:12.000 Yeah, it's just more comfortable to listen to.
02:24:14.000 It's relaxing. 0.99
02:24:15.000 Well, if you listen to, like, Biggie's real shit, like, have you ever seen the video of him freestyling when he was 16 years old? 0.99
02:24:22.000 That's what you gotta see. 0.99
02:24:24.000 So go to this. 1.00
02:24:26.000 Kill that. 0.99
02:24:28.000 Go to Biggie when he was 16 years old. 0.99
02:24:31.000 Is that it?
02:24:32.000 Oh, okay.
02:24:32.000 Yeah.
02:24:33.000 Play this. 1.00
02:25:22.000 God damn! 1.00
02:25:23.000 Keep going. 1.00
02:25:37.000 Damn, that's 17. How good was he? 0.99
02:25:40.000 There's something about freestyle, though, that it's not...
02:25:44.000 It's like roast jokes.
02:25:46.000 Yeah, but how about the fact, first of all, it's not freestyle.
02:25:48.000 Those were written rhymes.
02:25:51.000 Those were written rhymes.
02:25:52.000 He wrote all that stuff.
02:25:53.000 I think all freestyles are.
02:25:53.000 A lot of them are.
02:25:54.000 But it's like being able to flow on the point and then have the right things to say.
02:25:59.000 But you've just got to appreciate what he just did.
02:26:02.000 A microphone, an old-school microphone like Chris Rock in one of those posters.
02:26:08.000 Lenny Bruce, those old-school microphones.
02:26:09.000 He's got one of those. 0.99
02:26:10.000 He's standing on a fucking corner in front of a grocery store on the street. 1.00
02:26:13.000 And there's people all around him. 0.99
02:26:15.000 And there's an actual rap battle going on on the corner.
02:26:19.000 I mean, that's like one of the greatest videos.
02:26:21.000 Inside there's a Korean guy just loading buck shots. 0.98
02:26:23.000 Look at this, in Bed-Stuy.
02:26:25.000 That's one of the greatest videos in the history of pop culture. 0.97
02:26:28.000 You want to talk about a talented motherfucker in his environment, the environment where he developed and grew, and you see how good he is? 0.93
02:26:35.000 And in his hand, he's got notes, dude. 1.00
02:26:37.000 In his left hand, he's got his fucking lyrics, man. 0.99
02:26:40.000 Look at that. 1.00
02:26:40.000 Most likely. 1.00
02:26:41.000 I mean, whatever he's holding in his hand, I would assume that that's probably his notes.
02:26:46.000 Yeah, I never even noticed that in a second before.
02:26:48.000 Is it cash?
02:26:49.000 It could be cash, but it's weird-shaped money. 0.97
02:26:51.000 It's like Bolivian money or some shit. 0.99
02:26:53.000 The end. 0.93
02:26:54.000 Yeah, I mean, it doesn't look like cash, right?
02:26:56.000 It looks like notes.
02:26:57.000 It looks like he's got a notepad.
02:26:58.000 Or maybe it might be a towel.
02:26:59.000 Towel, yeah.
02:27:01.000 He always was sweaty.
02:27:01.000 That's the one thing.
02:27:03.000 He's a bad motherfucker, dude. 1.00
02:27:05.000 I mean, it's just amazing to see how good his flow was at 17. He's my all-time. 1.00
02:27:10.000 My all-time favorite rapper?
02:27:11.000 That's right there.
02:27:12.000 Him and Nas.
02:27:13.000 Nas is like my all-time best lyricist. 0.93
02:27:16.000 I think Nas was like the most complex and the most like, like I would listen to Nas lyrics and I'd go, God damn, this dude's brilliant. 0.71
02:27:23.000 Just brilliant lyrics.
02:27:25.000 But you know a band that doesn't get enough, a group rather, doesn't get enough credit?
02:27:29.000 Gangstar.
02:27:31.000 Oh yeah, Guru. 1.00
02:27:32.000 Fuck, they were great. 1.00
02:27:33.000 Dude, fuck, they were amazing. 1.00
02:27:35.000 Gangstar, they had some fucking great jams. 1.00
02:27:38.000 Step in the arena? 0.99
02:27:39.000 Yeah.
02:27:40.000 Yeah, I like Gangstar a lot.
02:27:41.000 You know what's the worst ever?
02:27:42.000 Nice and Smooth.
02:27:44.000 No, what's Nice and Smooth?
02:27:45.000 You don't remember Nice and Smooth, Hip Hop Junkies, where they used the Partridge Family song?
02:27:49.000 Oh, you've heard that.
02:27:50.000 No, I haven't.
02:27:52.000 Really?
02:27:53.000 I blocked it out. 0.99
02:27:54.000 Like Ari's butthole, I blocked it out.
02:27:57.000 If you like Gangstar, they had this song...
02:28:00.000 Okay, I might not actually know about this.
02:28:01.000 They did the song Dwick.
02:28:04.000 Or...
02:28:04.000 Yeah, you know...
02:28:06.000 Well, I don't know.
02:28:07.000 Go to it.
02:28:08.000 Sometimes I rhyme slow, sometimes I rhyme quick.
02:28:09.000 You don't remember that song?
02:28:10.000 Oh, I do remember that.
02:28:12.000 See, but that's kind of like...
02:28:14.000 These guys are so not in the mix that they actually grew old.
02:28:14.000 What year was this?
02:28:18.000 No one killed them or nothing.
02:28:19.000 Look at them.
02:28:20.000 Look at how old they are.
02:28:22.000 They're doing fantastic.
02:28:22.000 Good 401ks.
02:28:24.000 Yeah.
02:28:25.000 What does that say?
02:28:25.000 91?
02:28:26.000 No diabetes.
02:28:28.000 91, man, I was out of the loop.
02:28:30.000 That was like when I was struggling hardcore as a comedian dog.
02:28:35.000 That was three years into my comedy career.
02:28:37.000 I was doing nothing but doing stand-up.
02:28:38.000 I didn't go to any clubs where I would ever hear this.
02:28:41.000 If you want to chuckle, play the first verse of Hip-Hop Junkies.
02:28:47.000 He's talking about lyrics.
02:28:49.000 Everything is non-sequit.
02:28:50.000 It's not like a cool thing.
02:28:52.000 He just says words that rhyme.
02:28:54.000 Nothing makes any sense.
02:28:57.000 91 is when I lost my virginity.
02:28:59.000 Kill the audio for the YouTube video so it doesn't get as pulled off. 1.00
02:29:01.000 Oh, these fucks. 0.99
02:29:02.000 The podcast audio should be able to hear this. 1.00
02:29:04.000 Okay.
02:29:05.000 Do you think Nice and Smooth does...
02:29:07.000 They do DRM? For us, let's hear this.
02:29:12.000 Can you guys hear it?
02:29:13.000 No, we don't hear anything.
02:29:17.000 We don't hear anything.
02:29:19.000 So let's give it up for...
02:29:20.000 Oh, is this in Living Color?
02:29:23.000 Oh, wow.
02:29:23.000 Is that what this is?
02:29:24.000 In Living Color.
02:29:30.000 I remember this.
02:29:31.000 Do you remember this?
02:29:32.000 Yeah.
02:29:33.000 Wow.
02:29:37.000 See, I went for a period of a few years where I'd watch very little TV. I didn't watch much pop culture stuff.
02:29:51.000 I don't know this at all.
02:29:54.000 Orca was a great big whale.
02:29:56.000 I knew a fat girl who broke the scale. 1.00
02:30:00.000 Man, check out the Fly Girls. 1.00
02:30:06.000 Hey, they were sagging.
02:30:08.000 They were sagging even way back then.
02:30:10.000 Whoa.
02:30:10.000 Oh, yeah.
02:30:11.000 So this is 91?
02:30:14.000 Sean Wayans was 20 years from doing an open mic.
02:30:20.000 How dare you?
02:30:21.000 He's a nice fellow.
02:30:22.000 SW1. Okay, you can stop this before we all die of fucking shitty music overload. 1.00
02:30:30.000 Black eyes and orange hats. 1.00
02:30:31.000 Remember those days?
02:30:33.000 No, compare that to Biggie when he was 17. Play some more of that.
02:30:37.000 Play this. 0.99
02:30:41.000 I bet if black people kept dressing like Heavy D or like A Different World, there wouldn't be people getting killed in the streets like that. 1.00
02:30:47.000 Dude, he looks like he was just playing golf. 0.99
02:30:51.000 He really dressed like a little kid, black kid school picture.
02:30:55.000 Alright, alright.
02:30:56.000 No comparison.
02:30:58.000 I do not like that other stuff.
02:31:00.000 No, it's horrible.
02:31:02.000 Is that the worst ever?
02:31:03.000 I think it's probably one of the worst rappers ever.
02:31:06.000 I try to concentrate on the best.
02:31:06.000 Hmm.
02:31:08.000 I try to see the best in things, Jay Oakerson.
02:31:10.000 The exception of, like, maybe, like, didn't, like, Dee Dee Ramone make a rap album or something like that?
02:31:13.000 Who's Dee Dee Ramone?
02:31:14.000 From the Ramones.
02:31:15.000 No way.
02:31:16.000 Joey Ramone, Dee Dee Ramone?
02:31:17.000 Yeah, Dee Ramone, when he was on heroin, made a rap video, I think.
02:31:22.000 No.
02:31:22.000 Yeah, I'm pretty sure.
02:31:23.000 Why?
02:31:24.000 Because he was on heroin.
02:31:26.000 He needed heroin money.
02:31:27.000 Didn't Chris Cornell from Soundgarden make some really bad pop album?
02:31:31.000 Like, really poppy, Britney Spears-y type music?
02:31:35.000 Didn't he?
02:31:37.000 I don't know.
02:31:37.000 What is this?
02:31:39.000 What are you playing?
02:31:39.000 Didi King's rap album?
02:31:41.000 No way.
02:31:43.000 This is Didi Ramon?
02:31:46.000 Didi King's what he called himself?
02:31:53.000 Gotta see him.
02:31:54.000 Oh, stop.
02:31:55.000 Stop this.
02:31:55.000 Stop this right now.
02:31:56.000 Oh yeah, it's him.
02:31:56.000 Stop this.
02:31:57.000 It's Steve Ramirez.
02:31:57.000 Oh my god.
02:31:58.000 Do you think he's being silly? 0.98
02:32:00.000 I mean, he got up and his place is a mess and his pizza on the floor. 0.97
02:32:04.000 He's living that rock and roll lifestyle.
02:32:06.000 Oh god, this is awful.
02:32:08.000 Okay, stop it.
02:32:09.000 Stop it! 0.99
02:32:10.000 What was the other one that we just said?
02:32:11.000 Oh, the Chris Cornell stuff.
02:32:13.000 I remember that.
02:32:14.000 It was like widely decided that that wasn't good. 0.97
02:32:18.000 But he was so fucking good in Soundgarden. 0.92
02:32:21.000 It's hard to imagine he was bad in anything. 0.97
02:32:23.000 Listen to Blow Up the Outside World and go, look, that guy gets a pass forever. 0.98
02:32:29.000 If he can do that, you can try all your fucking goofy Garth Brooks, Chris Gaines type projects. 0.99
02:32:36.000 Sometimes that works. 0.99
02:32:37.000 Sugar Ray was like a speed metal band.
02:32:41.000 Sugar Ray?
02:32:42.000 Yeah, they have a song called Mean Machine.
02:32:44.000 It was their one sort of radio hit.
02:32:48.000 And then they were like, you're good looking, man.
02:32:51.000 Cut that hair and frost your tips and go sing songs.
02:32:54.000 Is that Sugar Ray Mark McGrath?
02:32:55.000 Yeah.
02:32:56.000 How did that guy wind up an entertainment news reporter?
02:32:59.000 Nice to look at.
02:33:01.000 He's beautiful to look at, but he was a really good musician.
02:33:04.000 But I think he probably wanted it.
02:33:05.000 I bet he doesn't believe in...
02:33:07.000 Your heart's probably in the music you don't succeed with if that happens to you.
02:33:12.000 So that style of music, I just want to fly.
02:33:15.000 I don't think that's what he wanted to do.
02:33:16.000 If you hear his original...
02:33:17.000 They have videos of like...
02:33:20.000 The original way the band was, and they changed completely.
02:33:23.000 I heard Incubus did that too, though.
02:33:25.000 I didn't know Incubus very much before the radio hits, but my buddy tells me all the time that they were a pretty big into psychedelics.
02:33:34.000 Psychedelic metal band, yeah.
02:33:36.000 Incubus?
02:33:36.000 Yeah, before they did Wish You Were Here and all that stuff.
02:33:39.000 Family Values Tour with Korn and Deftones.
02:33:41.000 They were on OzFest before.
02:33:43.000 What made them change?
02:33:45.000 Money.
02:33:45.000 You know, record executives come in and they go, you're really handsome.
02:33:48.000 Because he was like a dirtbag, too, looking guy.
02:33:51.000 But he's a pretty boy.
02:33:52.000 Everyone knows him as a pretty boy in Incubus.
02:33:54.000 Wow, that's weird.
02:33:55.000 Wow, that's great.
02:33:56.000 That's the untold stories of the music business, the manipulation.
02:34:01.000 Just like we were talking about movies.
02:34:03.000 You know, it's got to be a lot of that in the music business as well.
02:34:05.000 They just decide what's going to make it work.
02:34:07.000 The beauty of rap is when they get angry at each other, they start explaining who had the better childhood. 0.98
02:34:11.000 They start shitting, you know what I'm talking about? 1.00
02:34:13.000 I can listen to this motherfucker who went to private school. 1.00
02:34:15.000 Like, that's like, oh, they're always like, man, each other over that. 1.00
02:34:17.000 Full-on education. 1.00
02:34:18.000 Yeah, and they're like, shit. 0.99
02:34:19.000 Do you remember that was the big thing with that? 0.99
02:34:20.000 I mean, eventually got super exposed, but Dr. Dre, like, right before NWA was wearing, like, you know, a glittery...
02:34:27.000 I forget what they were called.
02:34:27.000 Yeah.
02:34:29.000 I just watched that Welcome to Death Row documentary the other day.
02:34:32.000 That is...
02:34:32.000 I can't remember the NWA. Man, Suge Knight is just...
02:34:35.000 That's a scary dude, man.
02:34:37.000 What is this?
02:34:38.000 Sugar Ray Mean Machine?
02:34:39.000 Yeah, what their original thing was, yeah.
02:34:41.000 Let me hear this.
02:34:43.000 It's terrible.
02:34:47.000 That's gross.
02:34:50.000 Whoa.
02:34:51.000 Yeah, it looks weird, too.
02:34:54.000 It's not just...
02:34:56.000 It just looks...
02:34:57.000 Early, mid-90s.
02:34:57.000 It looks...
02:34:59.000 These guys, someone needs to take them out for a hard night somewhere.
02:35:03.000 Outside of like Orange County Take them out of Laguna Beach and Bring them to like a really they need scars and tattoos and some life experience You can't pose different guys in front of that old Cadillac.
02:35:16.000 Just stop that.
02:35:17.000 That does not make you slick That's not your car, is it?
02:35:21.000 IS IT? It's not your fucking car. 1.00
02:35:24.000 For some reason I believe like Maroon 5 was always Maroon 5 though They've actually evolved with the times to go towards more popular music. 0.99
02:35:30.000 That does look like the Comedy Store Jamie Oh my god, it is the Comedy Store, isn't it?
02:35:35.000 It's the stage.
02:35:35.000 No.
02:35:36.000 That might be.
02:35:37.000 That's the main room stage, dude.
02:35:38.000 That's too small.
02:35:39.000 No, just with the camera.
02:35:40.000 It's the angle of the camera, man. 0.99
02:35:42.000 Holy shit, it is. 0.99
02:35:43.000 I mean, there's also a whole drum kit in the ring. 0.99
02:35:44.000 It's very possible.
02:35:45.000 We'll find out.
02:35:46.000 Oh no, it is.
02:35:47.000 That totally is.
02:35:48.000 It's got the side stairs on each side.
02:35:48.000 100%.
02:35:51.000 I mean, if it's not, it's a very similar design. 0.88
02:35:54.000 No, it's the same dick lights on the side. 0.81
02:35:57.000 Yeah, that's it. 0.97
02:35:57.000 I just was fooled with the camera. 0.97
02:35:59.000 Wow, that's fucking crazy. 1.00
02:36:03.000 That Comedy Store main room stage has seen a lot of shit. 1.00
02:36:07.000 That's where Richard Pryor filmed Live at the Sunset Strip, right? 0.99
02:36:10.000 I thought so.
02:36:11.000 I'm pretty sure.
02:36:12.000 Pull that Richard Pryor Live at the Sunset Strip.
02:36:15.000 I think, I'm almost positive it was filmed at the Comedy Store.
02:36:18.000 One of them was filmed at the Comedy Store, right?
02:36:21.000 Was it?
02:36:22.000 Well, the Kinnison one, the HBO special, was filmed at the Roxy.
02:36:28.000 You know, for whatever reason.
02:36:29.000 He was probably banned from the Comedy Store when it went down.
02:36:32.000 Because he was always like... 0.99
02:36:33.000 They fucking repaired the bullet hole in the back sign. 0.98
02:36:37.000 I was like, why did you do that? 0.99
02:36:40.000 Like, why would you do that?
02:36:41.000 Why would you fix that?
02:36:42.000 From Kinison.
02:36:44.000 Kinison shot a gun in the parking lot to scare Dice. 1.00
02:36:47.000 He shot the fucking sign, and there was always a bullet hole in it. 1.00
02:36:51.000 I was like, why would you fix that? 1.00
02:36:53.000 Like, we didn't, you know, thought it was a good idea to fix it.
02:36:54.000 No! 0.89
02:36:57.000 Goddammit, how could you fix that? 0.97
02:36:58.000 Like, well, there's still the hole in the back of it.
02:37:00.000 I'm like, not good enough.
02:37:01.000 Right.
02:37:02.000 Not good enough.
02:37:02.000 You need to leave the whole hole.
02:37:04.000 The whole thing.
02:37:05.000 Where was it?
02:37:06.000 Hollywood Palladium.
02:37:07.000 Oh, was it the Palladium?
02:37:09.000 The rest of it was recorded in San Carlos, California.
02:37:11.000 What?
02:37:12.000 Wait a minute.
02:37:13.000 Live on the Sunset Strip?
02:37:16.000 Was all done in a different place?
02:37:18.000 Except for one part of it.
02:37:19.000 That's crazy!
02:37:20.000 So it wasn't on the Sunset Strip.
02:37:22.000 And a year later.
02:37:25.000 What?
02:37:25.000 How is that possible?
02:37:27.000 How is that possible?
02:37:32.000 I can get lost on looking at track listing names of comedy albums.
02:37:36.000 These aren't so bad, but sometimes they are just hilarious.
02:37:39.000 Pull up a video.
02:37:41.000 Pull up a video of it.
02:37:42.000 You know one of the funniest track listings?
02:37:45.000 Nate Bargatze?
02:37:47.000 He's a very funny comic.
02:37:49.000 He has a special, actually.
02:37:50.000 It was on Comedy Central air this last week.
02:37:53.000 But his album, the tracks are just called.
02:37:55.000 It was like, alright, good start.
02:37:57.000 And the track 2 is like, getting them.
02:37:59.000 And the 2 is like, starting to lose them. 0.82
02:38:01.000 It's how the crowd was reacting, which is fucking pretty hilarious. 0.50
02:38:04.000 That's a funny thing. 0.97
02:38:05.000 He's like, losing them now.
02:38:06.000 He's up, got them back.
02:38:07.000 The track 7 is like, got them back.
02:38:09.000 Did you find them?
02:38:10.000 It is really weird how the East Coast comics and the West Coast comics rarely know each other.
02:38:15.000 This is crazy.
02:38:16.000 He probably wore the same suit everywhere and did it at a bunch of different locations, but decided not to use the ones on the Sunset Strip for most of the recording.
02:38:26.000 That's crazy.
02:38:28.000 And you can't really tell because he's in a dark stage.
02:38:31.000 He made it just like a regular show.
02:38:33.000 That's one thing that was really smart.
02:38:35.000 He didn't make the audience all lit up like they do in these new Comedy Central specials. 0.99
02:38:39.000 Those motherfuckers are obsessed with lighting the room up. 1.00
02:38:43.000 They want to light everybody up. 1.00
02:38:44.000 Like, hey, fuckhead, that's not how it looks at a comedy show. 0.98
02:38:46.000 And when you do that, the audience gets weird. 0.99
02:38:49.000 Yeah, you can kind of tell that's not the store.
02:38:51.000 Oh, yeah.
02:38:52.000 Yeah, I don't know why I did think it was.
02:38:54.000 I haven't seen this in a while.
02:38:55.000 This is probably one of the all-time greatest comedy documentaries.
02:39:00.000 I mean, not probably.
02:39:01.000 One of the all-time greatest comedy specials ever.
02:39:06.000 Just a documentary as well kind of because you're sort of you're looking back into this time into 1982 When Richard Pryor was on fire, I mean just literally and physically right this is after a freebase Yeah, well,
02:39:21.000 you know, he did really um get burnt in a freebase Accident said he did lit himself on fire The reality is he threw some liquor on him and lit himself on fire.
02:39:31.000 That's what actually happened.
02:39:32.000 In like a Steve-O way, or like, I'm going to end it all right now?
02:39:34.000 End it all right now.
02:39:35.000 Just down in the deepest, deepest, darkest hole after freebasing.
02:39:41.000 That's why he admitted it later, later in life, you know, that he had tried to kill himself.
02:39:46.000 That he had lit himself on fire.
02:39:48.000 And then look, just after that, here he is on stage, killing.
02:39:51.000 And everybody loved him.
02:39:53.000 Talk about balance.
02:39:55.000 I mean, that's like...
02:39:58.000 To be normal and have those cohesive thoughts and put those things together like that.
02:40:03.000 At one point, a year or so before this, you're just down in that rabbit hole.
02:40:10.000 Back up a little bit, Jamie.
02:40:11.000 Back up to that side view of him again.
02:40:13.000 I want to point something out here.
02:40:14.000 Watch the way he moves.
02:40:16.000 Pay attention to his hands as he's talking, because we can't hear what he's saying.
02:40:19.000 Look at the rhythm.
02:40:22.000 He's putting on a show with his hands.
02:40:24.000 While he's performing, his hands are moving in this delicate, controlled way that it's kind of cool to watch.
02:40:33.000 And it accentuates the material itself.
02:40:35.000 It accentuates the joke.
02:40:37.000 He's moving his hands through the air.
02:40:40.000 It's weird to watch.
02:40:42.000 It's like he's doing a little dance while he's also telling the joke.
02:40:45.000 His hands going up above his head to emphasize things.
02:40:48.000 That's cocaine.
02:40:49.000 His hands moving around.
02:40:50.000 It's performers' hands.
02:40:50.000 No, no, no, it's not.
02:40:52.000 He's just a really great stand-up.
02:40:54.000 And he's moving.
02:40:55.000 This is not a guy just standing in front of a microphone talking.
02:40:59.000 There's a way that he's moving that was also funny.
02:41:02.000 It was like, it's cool to watch.
02:41:04.000 Like, there's a rhythm to the way he would, like, go in and out, like, he's relaxing you by walking.
02:41:10.000 He's in between bits, you know?
02:41:12.000 And now he's starting on another one, and the hands start moving again.
02:41:14.000 It's like he's doing a puppet show or something.
02:41:17.000 You know?
02:41:18.000 I mean, look at the way he moves.
02:41:19.000 Like, we're not hearing him, so we can only see him.
02:41:22.000 But we can hear the rhythm and the type of material he was doing just by the way he's moving his hands!
02:41:30.000 That was part of what his act was.
02:41:34.000 It was his actual physical movements were funny.
02:41:37.000 They were vulnerable, they were gentle, they were rhythmic, and they were hypnotic.
02:41:44.000 There was a hypnotic aspect to the way he actually moved.
02:41:47.000 But doesn't...
02:41:48.000 I guess not all of them, but...
02:41:51.000 A lot of good comics have that element, I think.
02:41:54.000 Sure.
02:41:54.000 Because you have to stay captivating.
02:41:56.000 Oh yeah.
02:41:57.000 We all do.
02:41:58.000 And then there's the people who get called...
02:42:02.000 I mean, that was like the dig on... 0.99
02:42:03.000 I came in comedy at a time where, like, I didn't know Dane Cook enough to be like, ugh, that asshole's making it. 0.99
02:42:11.000 But there was a lot of around me people that, you know, it's like, oh, he's just herking and jerking around on stage, and that's all it is, and kind of a bunch of nonsense. 0.99
02:42:19.000 But I was like, I don't know, I think there's something to it.
02:42:20.000 I mean, there was definitely an element of what he did with that that...
02:42:23.000 That brought something to what he did.
02:42:24.000 You know what I mean?
02:42:25.000 I'd be lying if I said Dane Cook didn't make me laugh at him.
02:42:27.000 I've laughed at a bunch of stuff.
02:42:29.000 Well, a bunch of people enjoyed his movements, you know, but there's a thing about that style of comedy and like, okay, here's another, here's a better example, like Emo Phillips. 0.98
02:42:38.000 Emo Phillips, that shit works when you're 25. That shit works when you're 35. But when you're 45, people start going, hey man, why are you talking like that? 1.00
02:42:48.000 You know, like, why are you doing that?
02:42:49.000 Like, what is that?
02:42:50.000 That I'm pretending that I'm sorry.
02:42:54.000 Especially when you pull the curtain on that.
02:42:56.000 Yes. 0.99
02:42:56.000 And you do interviews and shit. 0.99
02:42:58.000 Bobcat had a band in his early persona. 0.98
02:42:58.000 Like Bobcat. 0.98
02:43:02.000 He's pretty open about that.
02:43:03.000 He talks about it.
02:43:03.000 But his...
02:43:06.000 You know, you know, yeah, he would he would have this crazy like wild fucking pulling his hair and screaming and eventually say some really funny shit. 0.98
02:43:15.000 Yeah, and you could watch that one, I don't remember what it was called, but I remember renting it at a video store when I was younger. 0.89
02:43:20.000 He's wearing like a sleeveless cowboy shirt almost on the cover of it and he's like super sweaty and he's drinking tab coals, but he actually stops Doing, he never announces it, just somewhere in the middle of the set, it just, that fades away, that character he's doing.
02:43:36.000 Huh.
02:43:37.000 Well, he probably got annoyed with it after a while.
02:43:39.000 But in the middle of that actual set is when, I mean, he still had the long hair and everything.
02:43:43.000 It was like, uh, he was, yeah, it just stops doing it in the middle, which I thought was, uh...
02:43:47.000 Interesting.
02:43:48.000 It was odd, but yeah, when you commit to that character full-time, and you have to worry about that.
02:43:52.000 Emo Phillips is a good example.
02:43:53.000 I wonder about Mitch Fattel.
02:43:55.000 I like Mitch very much.
02:43:56.000 You know Mitch Fattel, right?
02:43:57.000 I mean, I've worked with him recently.
02:44:01.000 When you're starting to show age on your face, it's hard to be like the man-child.
02:44:04.000 You know what I mean?
02:44:05.000 You're still a tiny guy, so it works and everything, but it's not even...
02:44:07.000 It's just like, how long will it?
02:44:10.000 There may be a very definitive brick ceiling on that.
02:44:10.000 Right.
02:44:15.000 Yeah, like a bomb shelter type ceiling.
02:44:17.000 Yeah, man.
02:44:19.000 Emo Phillips was the big one.
02:44:21.000 That was a big one.
02:44:22.000 Because I remember watching him all of a sudden just do regular stand-up, and I was like...
02:44:26.000 But I watched like a transitionary time where he wasn't just doing regular stand-up.
02:44:29.000 He was kind of like doing a softer version of his old self the way he used to do comedy.
02:44:34.000 Oh, yeah.
02:44:35.000 Someone on At Midnight doing it, which was weird.
02:44:38.000 He was doing it on that show?
02:44:40.000 He was talking like that?
02:44:41.000 Yeah.
02:44:42.000 Very, very weird.
02:44:44.000 I mean, you can't fault it if it works.
02:44:46.000 Hi, Chris Hardwick.
02:44:49.000 How do you properly dispose of bacon grease?
02:44:52.000 You gotta throw in the garbage.
02:44:54.000 In the garbage or like in the dirt?
02:44:56.000 Yeah, you can throw in the garbage.
02:44:57.000 Not in the pipes.
02:44:58.000 Yeah, don't throw in the pipes.
02:44:59.000 It's like, I mean, it's like flesh.
02:45:02.000 You know, it's like if you want to kind of get rid of fat.
02:45:05.000 How would you get rid of fat?
02:45:06.000 Outdoors is okay?
02:45:07.000 Throw it outside?
02:45:08.000 Yeah.
02:45:09.000 Like on a tree?
02:45:10.000 Why would you put it on a tree?
02:45:12.000 You mean under a tree?
02:45:13.000 Yeah.
02:45:13.000 Like, it's like fertilizer?
02:45:14.000 Just drive my dog nuts. 1.00
02:45:15.000 Turn that shit in the soap like Fight Club, dude. 1.00
02:45:18.000 Yeah, bro. 1.00
02:45:18.000 Yeah, bro. 1.00
02:45:19.000 Didn't they use human bodies for Fight Club or something like that?
02:45:22.000 Yeah, it was a human fat.
02:45:23.000 Yeah.
02:45:23.000 Human fat from a liposuction clinic or something like that?
02:45:27.000 Aren't they doing a Fight Club, too?
02:45:29.000 That comic book.
02:45:30.000 What?
02:45:31.000 Oh, he just wrote the book.
02:45:34.000 Oh, is it done?
02:45:36.000 I think it just came out or it's about to come out.
02:45:38.000 My friend did the artwork for it.
02:45:40.000 Really? 0.99
02:45:41.000 No shit. 1.00
02:45:42.000 So, are they going to make another movie? 1.00
02:45:44.000 I hope so.
02:45:45.000 It's the best movie ever.
02:45:46.000 It was not the best movie ever.
02:45:47.000 You hope there's a part two?
02:45:48.000 That was so not the best movie ever.
02:45:50.000 I love Fight Club.
02:45:51.000 Have you re-watched that?
02:45:52.000 Of course I re-watched it.
02:45:53.000 It's fun.
02:45:54.000 I like the movie Heat a lot, but I don't want to heat to.
02:45:57.000 It's fun up until the moment where you find out that he's the same guy and you're like, get the fuck out of here.
02:46:03.000 You watch Memento?
02:46:06.000 Yeah, Memento was good.
02:46:07.000 You hated that.
02:46:08.000 You hated the switcheroo. 1.00
02:46:09.000 Yes, it was so stupid. 1.00
02:46:10.000 Like, oh, you're the same guy as this guy that you've been following around and he's been teaching you to fight. 1.00
02:46:14.000 That's you.
02:46:15.000 You just forgot and now you remember.
02:46:17.000 Oh, great. 1.00
02:46:18.000 And now you're going to blow up a building or something stupid? 1.00
02:46:20.000 I wish that would happen to me. 1.00
02:46:20.000 Get the fuck out of here. 1.00
02:46:22.000 When I watch it, I've been convinced to enjoy it much more. 0.99
02:46:26.000 But when I saw it in the theater the first time, and that was like one of the first movies in a theater I saw that was like...
02:46:34.000 A little odd and different.
02:46:35.000 You know what I mean?
02:46:35.000 Like, I usually just kind of went and saw, like, whatever the blockbusters were.
02:46:38.000 I was pretty middle of the road on my movie taste at that age.
02:46:41.000 But, like, when I went to go see that, I was like, it was so bizarre at the ending.
02:46:43.000 I was like, I just kind of lost.
02:46:44.000 I didn't even get it.
02:46:45.000 I mean, I got it. 0.99
02:46:46.000 It was the same person, but I was like, this just looked like a weird shit at the end of the movie. 0.96
02:46:49.000 It also, for me, falls into that same sort of category as the fake Jimi Hendrix guitar thing. 0.99
02:46:53.000 I'm watching people beat the shit out of each other. 0.99
02:46:55.000 I'm like, look, nobody wants the fuck beaten out of them. 0.99
02:46:58.000 You're certainly not going to get a whole basement of dudes willing to beat the fuck out of each other. 0.98
02:47:01.000 It's just not going to happen. 0.99
02:47:02.000 And then, like, you know, we'll die for you.
02:47:04.000 Let me tell you something. 0.99
02:47:05.000 You get hit once.
02:47:06.000 You get really bare-knuckled once in the face.
02:47:08.000 Very unlikely you're going to keep doing that.
02:47:11.000 Very unlikely.
02:47:12.000 Showing up at work with black guys all the time, like, really? 1.00
02:47:15.000 Why wouldn't you just learn how to fight at a martial arts school, you fucking idiot? 1.00
02:47:19.000 You're going to meet with some asshole in a parking lot? 1.00
02:47:21.000 You guys are going to beat each other's brains out? 1.00
02:47:23.000 You're going to get on top of it? 0.76
02:47:24.000 Yeah, you ain't pretty anymore.
02:47:25.000 Remember that with Jared Leto?
02:47:26.000 Yeah, Jared Leto. 1.00
02:47:27.000 You beat him bloody until his fucking face was swollen? 1.00
02:47:29.000 Come on. 1.00
02:47:30.000 Yeah, that's a good movie.
02:47:32.000 What'd you feel about it? 0.84
02:47:34.000 I thought one of the dumbest scenes to me was... 0.91
02:47:38.000 When Edward Norton, oh, was that 25th Hour? 0.92
02:47:41.000 Did you ever see that at the end when he's like, I can't go and look in this pretty, so beat me up.
02:47:46.000 He goes, you're gonna be pretty again in like a couple weeks, man. 0.97
02:47:49.000 Like, you're gonna buy your butthole like four weeks? 0.98
02:47:52.000 Just go in pretty and fight that guy. 1.00
02:47:54.000 Like, fight the guy who's trying to fuck your butt. 1.00
02:47:56.000 How stupid is that? 1.00
02:47:57.000 I can't go in pretty. 1.00
02:47:58.000 He's that certain he's gonna get fucked in the ass right away. 1.00
02:48:01.000 I guarantee that's some more Hollywood fuckery. 1.00
02:48:04.000 That's some jackass who's never been punched saying, I think he should go and beat up. 1.00
02:48:08.000 He's going to get his buddy to beat him up. 0.99
02:48:10.000 This is the big turn.
02:48:12.000 Unmercifully, by the way.
02:48:13.000 It was like a crazy beating.
02:48:14.000 You lose your vision from those sometimes.
02:48:16.000 Sometimes you lose your sense of smell.
02:48:18.000 These guys lose their taste. 0.65
02:48:19.000 They can't taste things after they get punched in the head.
02:48:22.000 They literally don't know what things taste like.
02:48:24.000 Like this idea that someone's just gonna punch you and you just get all bruised up a little.
02:48:28.000 It's not a charley horse, okay? 1.00
02:48:29.000 He's punching your fucking brain. 1.00
02:48:31.000 Punching where you store your brain. 1.00
02:48:33.000 This is the container where your brain's in.
02:48:35.000 And it only has so many times it could even move like that.
02:48:37.000 Getting bounced off the curb. 0.99
02:48:39.000 Get the fuck out of here. 1.00
02:48:40.000 It's just ridiculous. 1.00
02:48:42.000 The trivialization of brain hemorrhaging and brain trauma and beatdowns like that. 0.95
02:48:48.000 It's like...
02:48:49.000 I can't go along with that.
02:48:50.000 I know too much. 1.00
02:48:51.000 I've seen too many people get the fucking brains beaten out of them. 1.00
02:48:54.000 I've seen it too many times. 0.99
02:48:55.000 So I didn't like Fight Club.
02:48:57.000 But ex-Mocking. 0.69
02:48:58.000 You didn't like?
02:48:58.000 Didn't like it.
02:48:59.000 Did you like Warrior? 1.00
02:49:00.000 Yes, but it was bullshit. 0.99
02:49:02.000 You can't fight two days in a row. 1.00
02:49:04.000 You just can't. 0.99
02:49:05.000 You'd be so fucked up from the first fight. 0.99
02:49:07.000 You'd be better to fight back-to-back. 1.00
02:49:09.000 Yes.
02:49:10.000 I would take meatloaf titties any day over that movie. 0.69
02:49:13.000 Well, I think Fight Club is a better movie than Warrior.
02:49:16.000 It's definitely a better, much better movie.
02:49:19.000 It's just that one reveal.
02:49:21.000 I could almost deal with the idea that these guys were filled with angst so much they wanted to beat each other up just so they could feel alive.
02:49:27.000 I could kind of get that for a little bit, but no one had any technique.
02:49:33.000 That doesn't make any sense to me.
02:49:34.000 The guys wouldn't actually learn how to fight.
02:49:36.000 Look at that. 0.83
02:49:37.000 Sweet little titties.
02:49:39.000 But, what was I going to say?
02:49:43.000 You bought into the fact that they were... 1.00
02:49:45.000 Just that the turnaround, the flip, the reveal that he was the same guy was just so dumb. 0.99
02:49:50.000 And it became a cult. 0.99
02:49:52.000 You can't do that.
02:49:52.000 You can't pretend that he was just, oh, it was just a dream.
02:49:56.000 Like your whole movie's based on like a switcheroo.
02:50:00.000 Like the whole movie's a big switcheroo.
02:50:02.000 Did not see the latest episodes of Grey's Anatomy then, when Mr. McDreamy dies.
02:50:06.000 Don't have to worry about that.
02:50:08.000 Is there a switcheroo?
02:50:09.000 Is there a switcheroo?
02:50:11.000 Oh, there's a thousand horrible switcheroos in that. 1.00
02:50:13.000 You do not have to worry about me watching that.
02:50:16.000 That's what the ending of Dexter just did the shittiest thing of all time.
02:50:20.000 Don't do it to me.
02:50:21.000 So much.
02:50:22.000 I can't do it.
02:50:22.000 It was horrible.
02:50:25.000 Well, that was one of the things that I really appreciated about that Ex Machina movie, is there's none of that.
02:50:29.000 Every scene in that movie, did you see it?
02:50:31.000 No, I'm seeing it tomorrow.
02:50:32.000 Jamie, you saw it. 0.98
02:50:33.000 It's fucking badass. 0.99
02:50:35.000 It's so smart. 0.99
02:50:36.000 It's so well done.
02:50:37.000 You buy every step of the way. 0.96
02:50:39.000 There's never one part in the movie where you're like, get the fuck out of here.
02:50:42.000 Is it a dark flick?
02:50:43.000 Pretty dark.
02:50:44.000 It's good, dude.
02:50:45.000 It's good.
02:50:46.000 It's creepy.
02:50:46.000 It's good.
02:50:47.000 It puts you in a position where you're like, fuck, I don't know, man. 1.00
02:50:51.000 It's about AI. I can't tell you, bitch. 1.00
02:50:53.000 It's about AI. It's pretty fucking good, man. 1.00
02:50:56.000 One of the best movies I've seen in many years. 0.97
02:50:59.000 Have you seen this Elon Musk thing?
02:51:01.000 The Tesla Firewall?
02:51:02.000 This new, very affordable solar power battery that he's invented? 0.99
02:51:06.000 That's $3,500 that could charge a fucking whole house. 0.98
02:51:10.000 Wow. 0.99
02:51:10.000 A total game changer. 0.99
02:51:12.000 Have you seen this shit, Jamie? 1.00
02:51:13.000 It's incredible. 1.00
02:51:15.000 There's a video, if you go on my Twitter feed, there's a video that I retweeted that somebody sent me a YouTube video of him explaining it.
02:51:22.000 It's a fucking complete total game-changer when it comes to batteries and wall-mounted units.
02:51:30.000 You could stack as many as nine of these wall-mounted units. 0.98
02:51:33.000 They're $3,500, which is like...
02:51:35.000 Solar power was like really prohibitively expensive for most people.
02:51:38.000 Like super, super expensive for those batteries. 0.99
02:51:40.000 The techs all fucked up. 1.00
02:51:42.000 They stink. 1.00
02:51:43.000 They overheat.
02:51:44.000 They're dangerous. 1.00
02:51:44.000 But apparently this fucking dude has nailed it. 1.00
02:51:47.000 I don't know. 1.00
02:51:48.000 I mean, I'm obviously not a fucking expert on batteries, but people are very, very excited about this fucking thing. 0.99
02:51:54.000 That's it right there. 0.99
02:51:54.000 We'll take our air cars. 0.99
02:51:55.000 We'll take our air cars to go buy one.
02:51:57.000 Yeah, give us some volume. 0.98
02:51:58.000 We'll close out with this, because we've got to get the fuck out of here. 0.95
02:52:00.000 It's 20 minutes long. 0.93
02:52:01.000 Well, give us just a little bit of volume here.
02:52:02.000 Jamie, play a little bit of it.
02:52:04.000 Look at the beautiful man. 1.00
02:52:05.000 Beautiful Iron Man type motherfucker. 1.00
02:52:07.000 This is a product we call the Tesla Powerwall. 0.98
02:52:10.000 And if you look back against that wall, you'll see a whole bunch of them as well in different colors.
02:52:15.000 How long before this guy makes an Iron Man suit?
02:52:17.000 You can pick your favorite color.
02:52:19.000 He's Iron Man.
02:52:20.000 And it looks like a beautiful sculpture on the wall.
02:52:24.000 I want to point out a few things that are very important about this.
02:52:30.000 The fact that it's wall mounted is vital because it means you don't need to have a battery room.
02:52:36.000 You don't have to have some room filled with nasty batteries.
02:52:40.000 It means that a normal household can mount this on their garage or on the outside wall of their house and it doesn't take up any room.
02:52:50.000 I mean, it's flat against the wall.
02:52:52.000 It has all of the integrated safety systems.
02:52:55.000 That's cool.
02:52:55.000 It's incredible.
02:52:57.000 You know, this guy's just like a fat wife and a moo moo. 1.00
02:53:00.000 To some other parts of life, it's just awful. 0.99
02:53:03.000 Like, this guy's like a guy in a movie.
02:53:05.000 It addresses all the needs.
02:53:07.000 So watch that, folks, if you want to watch, because we're out of time here.
02:53:10.000 The future.
02:53:10.000 But this guy's like a guy in a movie.
02:53:12.000 He's like a super billionaire genius inventor from a movie.
02:53:16.000 I mean, he makes a car that everybody falls in love with. 0.99
02:53:18.000 It's got a goddamn laptop in the middle of it. 0.99
02:53:20.000 You've seen those? 1.00
02:53:21.000 Yeah, my friend.
02:53:22.000 I haven't driven one, but I heard it's amazing. 0.97
02:53:24.000 Yeah, it's fucking incredible. 0.90
02:53:25.000 There's no feeling of shift at all. 0.97
02:53:27.000 It's just this acceleration.
02:53:28.000 There's a new one that comes out next year, though, that's gonna be a lot better, I heard.
02:53:32.000 Well, I don't think it's...
02:53:33.000 I don't know if it's next year.
02:53:34.000 His?
02:53:35.000 A new Tesla?
02:53:35.000 Yeah, a new Tesla.
02:53:36.000 Well, he had a new model that he debuted that's unbelievably fast.
02:53:39.000 It's zero to 60 in like three-something seconds.
02:53:41.000 It's all electric, right?
02:53:42.000 Insane.
02:53:43.000 All electric.
02:53:43.000 But they still can't go to Vegas.
02:53:45.000 You still can't go to Vegas.
02:53:47.000 Why?
02:53:47.000 You have to stop.
02:53:48.000 You have to stop halfway there and charge up in the middle of the fucking desert at some creep head fucking weirdo's stop where you plug in and you gotta wait for half an hour while they circle you like buzzards because they know you can't go anywhere. 0.99
02:54:00.000 Hey, man, you can't even drive with that right now. 0.99
02:54:03.000 If you're gonna drive with that right now, how far do you think you'd get?
02:54:06.000 How long does it last?
02:54:08.000 You might get 350 miles out of a tank.
02:54:12.000 You know, a charge, rather.
02:54:14.000 You might.
02:54:14.000 But if you're driving fast, you won't.
02:54:16.000 If you're driving fast, it's going to eat it up really quick.
02:54:19.000 It's like having a bunch of apps open.
02:54:20.000 Yeah.
02:54:21.000 It's going to eat it up.
02:54:22.000 So, like, when it starts lowering, it dims the inside lights. 0.99
02:54:26.000 It does all this shit to, like, Aubrey has one. 0.95
02:54:29.000 He almost died out on his way home one night. 0.99
02:54:32.000 Because he left it at his office.
02:54:33.000 And when you leave it somewhere, it slowly drains the battery.
02:54:36.000 Like, you can't leave it and just go away for three weeks and come back to a fully charged up battery.
02:54:41.000 It'll be hurting.
02:54:42.000 It's like having your iPhone and just leaving it on the kitchen table for a week.
02:54:45.000 Leaving it on.
02:54:46.000 Yeah.
02:54:47.000 Because it's also an iPhone.
02:54:49.000 Like a cell phone.
02:54:51.000 It's got a 3G connection.
02:54:52.000 Only 3G, which is whack.
02:54:54.000 But it's constantly connected to the internet.
02:54:57.000 So you could say, Google Flock of Seagulls.
02:55:01.000 And it'll pull up Flock of Seagulls.
02:55:03.000 And it'll start play Flock of Seagulls.
02:55:04.000 And it'll give you some options.
02:55:06.000 And you can just start...
02:55:07.000 It'll start streaming.
02:55:09.000 Like out of nowhere.
02:55:11.000 That's what I would have picked.
02:55:12.000 I know.
02:55:13.000 That's why I said it. 1.00
02:55:14.000 I knew it was your shit, man. 1.00
02:55:16.000 What is your shit? 1.00
02:55:17.000 If you're going to talk to your Tesla, what would you tell it? 1.00
02:55:19.000 Or you wear your Punisher shirt?
02:55:20.000 Oh, man.
02:55:21.000 It depends.
02:55:23.000 Depends on the mood, quite honestly.
02:55:25.000 It could be metal.
02:55:26.000 It could be a...
02:55:28.000 You know, Little River Band, a bunch of goofy, like, you know, soft rock hits, or 80s music, or rap, or whatever, yeah.
02:55:36.000 If you want to see a really bad movie, see the Dolph Lundgren version of The Punisher.
02:55:41.000 Horrible movie.
02:55:42.000 I went to the theater for that, I think.
02:55:43.000 Did you ever see the short they did with Thomas Jane?
02:55:46.000 Is it Thomas Jane who played him?
02:55:47.000 Well, here's, it's even better.
02:55:48.000 It's so bad, and it's low resolution back then, right?
02:55:52.000 And so they, he couldn't grow a beard.
02:55:54.000 And the Punisher had to have a beard. 0.60
02:55:56.000 So they smudge makeup on his face to pretend it's a beard.
02:55:59.000 See if you can pull it up and we'll end with this, because we'll get a nice, hearty man laugh.
02:56:03.000 All three of us can grow an actual beard. 1.00
02:56:06.000 Look at this pussy. 1.00
02:56:07.000 This Dolph Lundgren. 1.00
02:56:08.000 Meanwhile, he's a stud.
02:56:10.000 Karate champion.
02:56:11.000 Bruce Jenner understands.
02:56:11.000 Bruce Jenner's the only person to understand.
02:56:13.000 Yeah, Bruce Jenner, he has it all lasered off. 1.00
02:56:16.000 Fuck. 0.99
02:56:16.000 Can I see my podcast before everyone gets mad at me? 0.99
02:56:18.000 The Legion of Skanks? 0.96
02:56:19.000 The Legion of Skanks. 0.93
02:56:19.000 And the SDR show is on All Things Comedy, the same as Ari's. 0.93
02:56:22.000 What is the SDR show?
02:56:23.000 Sex, Drugs, and Rock and Roll. 0.99
02:56:24.000 Just interview porn stars and rock stars. 1.00
02:56:26.000 You guys are crazy. 1.00
02:56:27.000 We interview Tesla, but not that guy. 0.99
02:56:30.000 The band Tesla.
02:56:31.000 Oh my goodness.
02:56:31.000 That's the kind of interviews we do.
02:56:33.000 It's fun.
02:56:33.000 Very fun.
02:56:34.000 Is it available on iTunes?
02:56:35.000 All of them are available on iTunes?
02:56:37.000 All available on iTunes.
02:56:38.000 SDR shows on All Things Comedy. 0.99
02:56:40.000 See if you can go back to- see if you can find a good picture of his face, like a Google image, because it's so stupid. 0.99
02:56:47.000 You couldn't? 0.99
02:56:48.000 Oh, I guarantee you there's one. 1.00
02:56:50.000 Look at this fucking smudgy. 1.00
02:56:52.000 There we go. 1.00
02:56:53.000 Right there.
02:56:54.000 It's so fake.
02:56:56.000 He's got, like, fake beard on.
02:56:58.000 It's like a really...
02:56:59.000 No, that's not it.
02:57:00.000 Well, it's funny.
02:57:00.000 If you see the one where he's got the bullets on his chest, you can see when it's too light that he has no beard at all.
02:57:05.000 Yeah.
02:57:06.000 It's hard to tell.
02:57:08.000 I hated that movie.
02:57:08.000 You can tell a little bit there.
02:57:09.000 That movie pissed me off.
02:57:11.000 He's like a 12-year-old Cuban kid.
02:57:12.000 Well, he'd be so good as Drago, though.
02:57:15.000 He was so good as Drago.
02:57:17.000 Yeah, and that's what the Punisher would have looked like. 0.98
02:57:19.000 Yeah, but Brigitte Nielsen was so good as Mrs. Drago and she fucked Flavor Flav eventually. 1.00
02:57:23.000 So, you know, we all have our ups and peaks and valleys, y'all. 0.96
02:57:26.000 We're going to end with that. 1.00
02:57:27.000 Because that shit's real as fuck. 1.00
02:57:29.000 Remember Brigitte Nielsen? 1.00
02:57:31.000 Yeah, remember how hot she used to be. 1.00
02:57:33.000 Smoking!
02:57:33.000 A Cobra?
02:57:34.000 Wednesday night at the Comedy Store. 0.98
02:57:35.000 It's a ridiculous show.
02:57:37.000 Yeah, we got Sarah Silverman, you, Greg Fitzsimmons, Tony Hinchcliffe, Brody Stevens, and a bunch of surprise people.
02:57:44.000 But May 12th, San Francisco at the Punchline with Tony, and May 13th in Sacramento.
02:57:50.000 Tickets are on sale at Punchline Comedy Club.
02:57:52.000 And deathsquad.tv for all the dates, if you don't remember it.
02:57:57.000 And Redband on Twitter, if you want to...
02:57:59.000 Do you have your dates up on your iTunes or your Twitter page?
02:58:04.000 Yeah, they're at tourdates.deathsquad.tv.
02:58:07.000 Powerful Jay Oakerson.
02:58:09.000 I'm glad we could do it again.
02:58:11.000 Thanks for having me.
02:58:12.000 Hey, man, anytime you're in town, let me know.
02:58:14.000 We'll hook it up.
02:58:14.000 We'll keep doing it.
02:58:15.000 Always a good time, my friend.
02:58:17.000 Again, follow Big Jay Oakerson on Twitter.
02:58:21.000 Website...
02:58:23.000 BigJComedy.com. 1.00
02:58:24.000 BigJComedy, you fucks. 1.00
02:58:25.000 Alright. 0.99
02:58:26.000 Love you guys.
02:58:27.000 Talk to you soon.
02:58:28.000 Many, many more podcasts this week.
02:58:30.000 See ya.
02:58:30.000 Bye-bye.