The Joe Rogan Experience - Joe Rogan Experience #688 - Brian Redban

00:00:01.000 Ladies and gentlemen, the internet is a fucking crazy place. 1.00

00:00:07.000 I need some positive stuff, because I fucked up today. 0.99

00:00:12.000 This morning, got up this morning, did my usual stuff, checked my email, handled some business, was sitting there drinking a little kombucha, and I read my message board. 0.98

00:00:26.000 And I read this Planned Parenthood thread. 1.00

00:00:31.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

00:00:32.000 I'm just tweeting our shit. 1.00

00:00:33.000 And I read about... 0.99

00:00:35.000 I don't know if you guys know what's going on.

00:00:38.000 The Planned Parenthood was...

00:00:42.000 They were accused of selling fetuses, and actually not just selling fetuses, but making deals to deliver more intact fetuses, and talking about...

00:00:56.000 The body parts as line items, and I was like, well, come on, that can't be real.

00:01:03.000 So Call Me Pete is the gentleman who put it up on the website on the message board.

00:01:08.000 If you're having a problem, join that message board, by the way.

00:01:11.000 We switched hosts, and there was just a giant fuck-up along the way, and along the way there was something around... 0.64

00:01:20.000 13,000 spam accounts signed up that were just fake, like a bunch of numbers like 6-7-8-9-10, 6-7-8-9-10-11, 6-7-8-9-10-11-12, like that kind of shit, like a bunch of them, so we have to figure out a way to filter that stuff out.

00:01:35.000 But we'll let people in soon.

00:01:36.000 Anyway, the video, if you want to search for the video, the video on YouTube, if you really want to watch it, it's intact fetuses, in quotes, just a matter of line items for Planned Parenthood.

00:01:50.000 So I watch it.

00:01:52.000 And the video is disturbing.

00:01:54.000 First of all, it's disturbing the way this woman is talking about fetuses. 0.99

00:01:57.000 And, you know, it's kind of creepy the way she's talking about the...

00:02:02.000 There's buyers that want these specimens.

00:02:05.000 And I guess they're for medical tests or for scientific tests.

00:02:09.000 It's hard to sit through the whole thing.

00:02:14.000 Then they get deep into the video and that's where it gets really fucking disturbing because the people that are buying ask if they can see some of the product or some of the samples I think is the word they used so the woman says well from the abortion say they're all just in like a big pile and They they say well,

00:02:35.000 it's okay.

00:02:35.000 We just you know, we would like to go see him so they go to this pile and And they start picking things out with tweezers, including fully intact arms with hands.

00:02:48.000 Like a little baby arm that's maybe, you know, an inch and a half long, two inches long, with fingers.

00:02:56.000 And, you know, they're talking about it like... 0.85

00:03:00.000 Like you would talk about like how you grow tomatoes like well if you get tomatoes that are like six weeks old They look like that if you get them that are 12 weeks old you get more more parts Dude, it's fucking Really disturbing because they're pulling these things out with tweezers.

00:03:16.000 Oh, this is a lung.

00:03:17.000 Oh, what is that?

00:03:18.000 Can you can you see the thalamus?

00:03:20.000 Well, it's hard to tell in this big pile.

00:03:22.000 It's a pile of parts man and it first of all If you've ever had an abortion, or you know someone's had an abortion, or you've had a girlfriend, or you personally, you don't think about what exactly is going on there.

00:03:38.000 But when you look at this pile of these parts, you're forced to recognize exactly what it is, and then you're forced to wonder what's going on through the minds of these people that are just talking about them and referring to them in quotes, 0.99

00:03:54.000 just a matter of line items And there's this fucking pile of baby parts that they sucked out of a woman's body or a bunch of women's bodies. 1.00

00:04:05.000 It's disturbing. 0.99

00:04:07.000 I remember seeing this video because it was made for a recent bill or something like that in Congress that the anti-abortion people put as a shock video, a scare video, and I thought it was fully debunked.

00:04:21.000 I didn't know that that was the actual real thing.

00:04:26.000 How was it fully debunked?

00:04:28.000 I guess the video makes it show it was it's supposed to be one of those like gotcha videos Where it's it's it's mixing lies with like real stuff that they actually do in the video and I thought for sure it was debunked, but maybe I was wrong I didn't really look into it too much,

00:04:45.000 but well if you think it was debunked You can figure out a way to pull up a link that says it's debunked what Planned Parenthood hoax really proves right-wing extremists have no qualms or About destroying people's lives and when does this come out?

00:04:59.000 This came out July 16th This is that salon.com though by the way, which is an insanely left-wing site. 0.95

00:05:08.000 Yeah So let's just Google it just to say Planned Parenthood video White House says Planned Parenthood videos are fake.

00:05:16.000 Well, what's fake?

00:05:17.000 Yeah, I mean it's not the real people Um, okay.

00:05:23.000 New Planned Parenthood video.

00:05:24.000 Baby parts buyer jokes about shipping severed heads two hours ago from the Weekly Standard.

00:05:30.000 This is a new video.

00:05:33.000 The latest undercover Planned Parenthood video is an interview with Kate Dyer, CEO of an organization called STEM Express that buys aborted baby parts from Planned Parenthood and sells them to researchers.

00:05:46.000 There are no graphic images in this video, but Dyer's comments about shipping the severed intact...

00:05:53.000 I don't know what that word is.

00:05:55.000 Cal...

00:05:56.000 Calva...

00:05:59.000 Calva...

00:06:00.000 Calvarium?

00:06:01.000 Calvarium?

00:06:02.000 Hmm.

00:06:03.000 Calvarium.

00:06:05.000 Calvarium, or skull of an aborted baby, are bone chilling.

00:06:10.000 StemExpress, they say, I know we get requests for neural tissue.

00:06:16.000 It's the hardest thing in the world to ship.

00:06:17.000 The buyer says, you do it as a whole calvarium.

00:06:22.000 I guess that's the whole head.

00:06:23.000 And StemExpress says, yeah, that's it.

00:06:26.000 Yeah, that's the easiest way.

00:06:28.000 And I mean, we've actually had good success with that in the past.

00:06:32.000 Bayer says, yeah, make sure the eyes are closed.

00:06:35.000 And then STEM Express, loud laughter, tell the lab it's coming so they don't open the box and go, oh God, laughter.

00:06:42.000 So yeah, whereas so many of the academic labs cannot fly like that, they're just not capable.

00:06:48.000 Bayer says, why is that?

00:06:50.000 I don't understand that.

00:06:51.000 STEM Express says, it's almost like they don't want to know where it comes from.

00:06:55.000 I can see that.

00:06:57.000 Where they're like, in quotes, we need limbs, but no hands and feet need to be attached.

00:07:02.000 We want to take it all off, like, in quotes, make it so that we don't know what it is.

00:07:09.000 I don't know what is debunked and what's not debunked about that, because it seems like in the conversation, I mean look, when they're digging through that bag of baby parts, which was the most disturbing part of it.

00:07:25.000 Look, if people are gonna get abortions, I personally do not have a problem with them taking the aborted fetal tissue and using it for scientific experiments because The aborted fetal tissue already exists.

00:07:39.000 They're already having abortions. 1.00

00:07:41.000 And if abortions are legal, shouldn't there be something done with that aborted fetal tissue that may be beneficial to humanity?

00:07:48.000 Shouldn't there be a way that they can experiment?

00:07:50.000 I mean, it's not like they're asking people to get abortions that would normally have kept the baby and loved them and brought them to adulthood.

00:07:58.000 They're going to have the abortions. 1.00

00:08:00.000 So if they are going to have the abortions, Is it such a bad thing to use that fetal tissue for scientific experimentation?

00:08:08.000 That's not the disturbing part about it.

00:08:11.000 The disturbing part about it is the visual aspect of seeing the body parts.

00:08:15.000 You shouldn't see that, pretty much.

00:08:17.000 But, you know, what this article in the Huffington Post is saying is that what they did is they took shocking video of, you know, abortions, which is going to be disgusting anyways, and they're saying that, you know, Planned Parenthood's making all this money off of selling all the parts to, you know...

00:08:34.000 But what Planned Parenthood is saying is, no, we just donate it to scientists and people that want to use it for medical research.

00:08:43.000 That's not what was going on in the video.

00:08:45.000 In the video, the woman was talking about the amount of money that they would get doing it, and it was thousands of dollars a week.

00:08:50.000 And that's why they're saying that's a hoax, and they're saying that the visuals, what you're watching, wasn't what the audio was.

00:08:59.000 Wait a minute, that doesn't make any sense, because you see the woman say it.

00:09:02.000 The group behind the videos is facing at least two lawsuits because it's fake.

00:09:06.000 Is it in HuffPost?

00:09:07.000 HuffPost.

00:09:08.000 Let's see here.

00:09:10.000 CNN. It's on CNN. And what is CNN saying?

00:09:13.000 They're saying it's a hoax too?

00:09:14.000 Yeah, there's a company created to go against a left-wing advocacy group called Acorn.

00:09:19.000 And throughout this article, it also says...

00:09:23.000 Acorn is the same company that they were accused of...

00:09:26.000 They were trying... 0.85

00:09:27.000 People were trying to get funds for creating prostitutes or for pimping. 1.00

00:09:34.000 Remember?

00:09:34.000 Remember that whole thing where there was a bunch of people that were trying to get funds?

00:09:38.000 The first part here, it says there's a fake company set up called Biomax Procurement Services.

00:09:44.000 Right.

00:09:44.000 And that was the hoax.

00:09:46.000 And then according to the Hoaxer's website, it was a 30-month long investigative journalism study by the Center of Medical Progress documenting how Planned Parenthood sells body parts for aborted babies.

00:09:55.000 Right.

00:09:55.000 That's not true.

00:09:56.000 That's not true.

00:09:57.000 So they don't sell them.

00:09:59.000 Yeah, it's flat out untrue.

00:10:00.000 Okay.

00:10:01.000 So what was the woman in the thing where she was talking about body parts? 0.97

00:10:05.000 It's a shock video.

00:10:06.000 They were baiting them into conversations.

00:10:08.000 About other things?

00:10:09.000 About selling stuff.

00:10:10.000 It says that they really don't do that.

00:10:11.000 They were just trying to get them to say it, kind of.

00:10:14.000 But they did get them to say it.

00:10:16.000 So what is the deal?

00:10:17.000 She was talking about the bottom line, about how much money they could make and how much money she could add to the...

00:10:22.000 So was she like a rogue lady for Planned Parenthood? 0.92

00:10:25.000 That's what they're saying.

00:10:26.000 Yeah.

00:10:26.000 And they're also saying that this bill that was passing was going to cut off all funding to Planned Parenthood.

00:10:31.000 So this was like a full-on attack trying to get rid of Planned Parenthood by anti-abortionists.

00:10:36.000 Jamie, scroll back down, back where you were again.

00:10:40.000 The details of the processes are enough to trouble anyone.

00:10:43.000 Non-medical people don't talk about the price of requesting removing or shipping organs, pieces of fush from place to place.

00:10:49.000 Most of us would freak out if we listened to professionals in the local hospital, funeral home, or medical examiner's office discuss details about how a dying person's request to have their body parts donated I don't know.

00:11:17.000 So that is or isn't true?

00:11:19.000 That's not true.

00:11:19.000 So why was that woman saying it in the video?

00:11:21.000 Because it's a big hoax video.

00:11:23.000 That's why she has two lawsuits. 1.00

00:11:25.000 But without further explaining.

00:11:28.000 Because the woman was actually saying those things.

00:11:31.000 So what part is a hoax?

00:11:33.000 Because you also said that that woman was kind of rogue. 0.75

00:11:36.000 Because she was talking about how much money they could make from it.

00:11:42.000 I'm really confused.

00:11:43.000 Like, what is the hoax?

00:11:44.000 I understand that the people that were making the video weren't really what they were saying they were, right?

00:11:53.000 These people, they set this up and they got inside Planned Parenthood.

00:11:57.000 The way they were going through the body parts, the way they were picking up the body parts, that was all real.

00:12:04.000 I mean, it was 100% real.

00:12:06.000 There's no way it wasn't, unless they were rubber baby parts and they had actors. 1.00

00:12:09.000 Is there a chance the audio you were hearing wasn't what matched up the video?

00:12:13.000 You'd see the people's faces.

00:12:14.000 You'd see them saying it. 0.99

00:12:15.000 I mean, unless it was just fucking brilliantly done by terrorists. 0.94

00:12:19.000 This says that if you plow through the transcripts, you won't see what they... 0.95

00:12:22.000 I mean, this also could be talking about a separate video from what you just saw.

00:12:26.000 Maybe. 0.99

00:12:29.000 These fucking things are so, so confusing. 0.99

00:12:34.000 So there's a newly released video that just came out that's literally two hours ago online and this is the STEM Express CEO I don't know, 0.99

00:12:50.000 man. 0.98

00:12:51.000 It's, um, it's fucking, it's just, it's really one of those things. 0.99

00:12:57.000 Abortion, it becomes one of those left or right issues where you're either a left-wing person, you support abortion, or you're a right-wing person, you think it's horrific. 1.00

00:13:05.000 Wow.

00:13:05.000 I support people's right to do whatever they want to do.

00:13:08.000 I totally support people's right to have abortions, but at a certain point in time, like when is an abortion completely fucked up? 1.00

00:13:16.000 Like when you have a nine-month-old baby inside you and you decide to kill it before it comes out of your vagina. 1.00

00:13:20.000 Yeah, that's why it's illegal. 0.95

00:13:21.000 Yeah, but at a certain point in time, that baby's still viable outside the womb, but you could still have an abortion. 0.59

00:13:27.000 Yeah, what is it?

00:13:28.000 I mean, they changed it so many times.

00:13:30.000 I think, is it like six weeks or no?

00:13:33.000 It's something.

00:13:34.000 It's not too crazy.

00:13:35.000 It's not six weeks.

00:13:36.000 It's like two or three months or something like that.

00:13:38.000 I think it's the most.

00:13:39.000 They were talking about 22-week-old.

00:13:41.000 They were talking about when you can really pick out organs and when you can see them. 0.99

00:13:48.000 That's fucking four, eight, twelve. 0.98

00:13:51.000 I mean, think about it when you start going into... 0.99

00:13:53.000 That's six months old.

00:13:54.000 Mm-hmm.

00:13:55.000 That's like, woo! 1.00

00:13:56.000 That's a fucking baby. 1.00

00:13:59.000 I would really like to know what the statistics is of what, you know, if you're going to get an abortion, how long until you wait. 1.00

00:14:05.000 Because it seems like most people I know, once they find out they're pregnant, they're like, next day I'm getting an abortion.

00:14:11.000 Well, that's because they had a sex with you. 1.00

00:14:13.000 Right. 1.00

00:14:14.000 Kill it! 1.00

00:14:15.000 I wonder how many people are like, you know, like three months in like, you know what? 1.00

00:14:19.000 I think I don't want this baby.

00:14:20.000 That's when it gets kind of creepy in my opinion.

00:14:23.000 Yeah, well, we all know people that are completely irresponsible and if you give them a way to justify anything and so they don't have to take responsibility for it and just take take it out of me You know, they don't want to think they don't see it in front of them.

00:14:38.000 They don't think of it as a baby The question really becomes, should you be allowed to do that?

00:14:43.000 And it's not my call.

00:14:45.000 I don't know whose call it is.

00:14:47.000 I don't know.

00:14:48.000 I mean, some people think it's their call.

00:14:49.000 Some people think that they should be blowing up abortion clinics and shooting doctors and, you know, they decide they're there to protect the children. 0.99

00:14:56.000 And that gets pretty fucked up, too. 0.99

00:14:58.000 It also gets pretty hypocritical because those are the same kind of people that are supportive of war. 1.00

00:15:03.000 You know, once your kid reaches 18, or if that kid's from another country, fuck them. 1.00

00:15:08.000 You know? 1.00

00:15:09.000 It's just weird.

00:15:10.000 But it was real weird looking at the unescapable reality of that video.

00:15:14.000 So whatever's fake or real in the conversations that they're having, there's no denying at all those body parts.

00:15:24.000 And that's where it gets really crazy.

00:15:26.000 We all knew that existed.

00:15:28.000 When you get an abortion, what it usually is is like a car wash vacuum. 0.98

00:15:35.000 It's a big tube and it goes into a humongous little pot or a tank or whatever.

00:15:42.000 So you know if you're going to look in that tank at what you're going to see.

00:15:45.000 You're not supposed to see it.

00:15:49.000 Well, yeah, that's kind of part of the problem, right?

00:15:52.000 You're not supposed to see it.

00:15:54.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:15:54.000 I mean, if you look at anything like that, you're going to be like, that's fucked up. 0.99

00:15:58.000 Yeah, but that is the fucked up one, right? 0.99

00:16:01.000 Because babies are helpless, and once they're alive, we want to take care of them. 0.99

00:16:05.000 And here you got these people with tweezers picking up arms with little fingers attached to it.

00:16:11.000 It's like, whoa.

00:16:12.000 Whatever is in that video that's fake, you know, that's not.

00:16:17.000 That's terrifying.

00:16:20.000 I don't know.

00:16:21.000 You know, I don't know what's...

00:16:22.000 I'll Google debunked and I'm sure there's a lot that tells you.

00:16:30.000 But it's just left-wing sites are saying it's debunked.

00:16:35.000 Right-wing sites are continuing to promote it.

00:16:40.000 It gets really weird.

00:16:43.000 Whoo! 0.78

00:16:45.000 What a bummer.

00:16:46.000 What a bad way to start off the podcast.

00:16:48.000 I know.

00:16:48.000 Yeah, that's what I thought.

00:16:49.000 That's how I started on my morning. 0.99

00:16:52.000 That and Cecil the Lion's cousin who killed a fucking safari guide. 0.99

00:16:56.000 In the same place where Cecil the Lion got killed, this fucking guy was leading walking photographic safari tours. 0.99

00:17:05.000 So the safari guide for the walking photographic safari tour... 0.99

00:17:10.000 Got taken out by a lion. 1.00

00:17:12.000 The lion was like, what are you doing outside the Jeep, you dumb fuck, and just jacked him. 1.00

00:17:17.000 It's hilarious that people are that stupid, that they think they can walk around where lions are walking around in this enormous, enormous park in Zimbabwe where lions are protected. 1.00

00:17:28.000 Have you ever been to one of those safari tours where the animals come right up and the lions and the monkeys just jump on your car or anything like that? 1.00

00:17:36.000 I've been to one of those wild animal parks in New Jersey to do that.

00:17:39.000 It was real weird.

00:17:41.000 It just feels goofy.

00:17:43.000 Like you're in your car and there's monkeys jumping on your car.

00:17:45.000 And they'll break your windshield wipers. 1.00

00:17:47.000 They do all kinds of fucked up shit to your car. 0.99

00:17:49.000 I don't even know if that place is still open anymore. 1.00

00:17:51.000 But...

00:17:52.000 It's just it's odd they would let you drive around in your car and You'd be on this tour and That means better I guess than the zoo but it's got to be fucked up for the monkeys because it's like The same thing is looking at people through glass except you're looking at people through glass that moves on rubber wheels And you're just looking at these people that are free and you're stuck in this enclosure and they're driving into your house and You know,

00:18:19.000 they're on a road, but it was weird. 0.94

00:18:21.000 It's like, there's something fucked up about zoos. 0.99

00:18:25.000 Just something really fucked up about zoos. 1.00

00:18:27.000 All of them. 0.98

00:18:29.000 Less fucked up for some animals, like my joke about giraffes, that giraffes seem to be pretty happy at the zoo, like babies can feed them. 0.98

00:18:38.000 It's true, man. 0.96

00:18:39.000 My three-year-old, when she was three, we brought her to the zoo, and she was feeding giraffes with her hand, and there was no worry at all.

00:18:46.000 Everybody's laughing and having a good time.

00:18:48.000 No giraffe has ever fucked up a kid at the zoo for feeding it. 0.87

00:18:52.000 It'd be really interesting to see if animals could talk and be like, no, dude, you don't understand.

00:18:56.000 I get to hang out here.

00:18:57.000 People feed me. 0.99

00:18:58.000 I don't have to do shit here. 0.98

00:19:01.000 The Cecil the Lion Killer costume has come out, which is interesting that they would actually do that. 0.99

00:19:09.000 It's actually a decapitated lion with a dentist outfit, with blood all over the dentist outfit.

00:19:17.000 And the guy that owns the company said that they've had so many requests for it so that...

00:19:22.000 I guess that's a thing, this Halloween.

00:19:24.000 I'm not shocked.

00:19:26.000 The Lion costume.

00:19:27.000 Of course.

00:19:28.000 That had to come out.

00:19:29.000 Yeah.

00:19:29.000 You knew that was coming out.

00:19:31.000 I mean, who didn't see that coming?

00:19:34.000 There it is.

00:19:35.000 Cecil the Lion splattered all over.

00:19:37.000 The guy's still in hiding, huh?

00:19:39.000 Nobody's seen that, dude.

00:19:40.000 I think I heard just the other day he just opened up his business again.

00:19:43.000 No!

00:19:44.000 Have you looked at his Yelp page?

00:19:46.000 It's not good.

00:19:47.000 I heard he was going to reopen up his business in September. 0.86

00:19:51.000 That's kind of fucked up about Yelp, because they're not even reviewing his business. 0.83

00:19:56.000 They didn't go, and yet their teeth cleaned. 0.96

00:19:59.000 Well, I hope, I haven't looked lately, but I hope Yelp stepped in.

00:20:02.000 Because, I mean, yeah, it got where it was just dead lions and his, like, photos for his dentist's office was just dead lions.

00:20:10.000 They can put photos?

00:20:11.000 Oh, like photos of food?

00:20:13.000 Yeah.

00:20:14.000 Stuff like that.

00:20:14.000 This is my lion after I brought it to the dentist.

00:20:17.000 Wow, so TMZ did a poll with almost 16,000 votes, if that was funny or offensive, about the Cecil the Lion costume, and 66% said that's offensive.

00:20:27.000 You know why? 1.00

00:20:28.000 Because there's 66% of people so fucking stupid they post on TMZ. Those people are apes. 1.00

00:20:34.000 Those are people too dumb for YouTube. 1.00

00:20:37.000 Like, YouTube's like, you're too stupid for our comments. 1.00

00:20:39.000 You gotta go over to TMZ. You gotta go post over there. 1.00

00:20:44.000 What do you think?

00:21:01.000 It's pretty sad. 0.99

00:21:03.000 Well, it's fucked up. 0.99

00:21:05.000 It's fucked up that the only way to save lions is to make them valuable for hunters. 1.00

00:21:10.000 Ultimately, that's the most fucked up thing about it. 0.99

00:21:14.000 The idea that there's two types of hunting for conservation that kind of makes sense to me. 0.99

00:21:23.000 When you have to kill certain animals because they're killing other animals.

00:21:28.000 If you have too many lions and you have to control the population, but that's not really the case.

00:21:34.000 That kind of hunting for conservation makes sense to me.

00:21:37.000 Or if there's like a lot of people don't realize that that rhino that that guy paid a shitload of money to shoot They were gonna kill that rhino anyway They had to kill that rhino because that rhino was killing other rhinos and when they do that they they have to This is like a non-viable male.

00:21:53.000 It's not breeding anymore And so it was attacking other males and killing them and it even attacked female and killed it they think so that's that's an animal they have to kill so if if you Get a guy who's willing to pay you a shitload of money to kill that rhino that you were already going to kill and then that money goes to conservation.

00:22:10.000 That makes sense.

00:22:11.000 So those are the two cases where hunting for conservation makes sense to me.

00:22:15.000 Other than that, hunting for food is the only thing that makes sense to me.

00:22:19.000 I don't get the idea of hunting like an animal just because you want to add it to your collection. 0.99

00:22:25.000 I think that's kind of fucked up. 1.00

00:22:27.000 The only time it makes sense is that it has to be killed. 1.00

00:22:30.000 They don't have to kill those lions. 1.00

00:22:32.000 There's not enough lions that they have to kill them.

00:22:34.000 It's not like there's an overwhelming number of lions, like they have to take them out because they're eating each other.

00:22:38.000 Like bears in Alberta, they got a real problem with bears in Alberta.

00:22:43.000 They have too many of them. 0.95

00:22:44.000 So that's why they let you kill two of them. 1.00

00:22:46.000 They're like, please come up here and kill some fucking bears. 1.00

00:22:48.000 And they have a real problem with wolves up there in B.C. They don't even have a limit. 1.00

00:22:54.000 You can kill as many wolves as you want in B.C. They want you to kill them because they're fucking everywhere. 1.00

00:22:59.000 They kill people's cows and those are the times where hunting for conservation Makes sense to me. 1.00

00:23:05.000 But this lion thing, these are rich dudes that want to go over there and they want to fill their trophy rooms up.

00:23:11.000 And that's a real natural reaction that people have that that's gross.

00:23:16.000 So just so everyone knows, I'm not on the side of killing lions.

00:23:21.000 Or anything.

00:23:22.000 Giraffes.

00:23:22.000 Anything.

00:23:23.000 Unless it's for food.

00:23:24.000 See, the thing about lions is...

00:23:26.000 Like, they kill that rhino.

00:23:27.000 Everybody ate that rhino. 1.00

00:23:28.000 The villagers came and they fucking... 0.99

00:23:30.000 They fed hundreds of people with that rhino. 1.00

00:23:32.000 Rhinos apparently taste good.

00:23:34.000 Like, rhinos apparently are like beef almost.

00:23:37.000 And that all these people were excited to cut off pieces of that rhino and have protein.

00:23:43.000 Nobody's lying enough to eat a lion.

00:23:45.000 You know?

00:23:46.000 That's a...

00:23:47.000 Apparently though, mountain lion tastes good.

00:23:49.000 Mountain lion supposedly tastes just like pork.

00:23:52.000 And it's apparently something that people have been eating since the pioneers came to America.

00:24:00.000 I never had it.

00:24:01.000 It's supposedly good with like a blueberry sauce.

00:24:04.000 They make like loin, like mountain lion loin.

00:24:07.000 I would try it. 1.00

00:24:08.000 I would definitely shoot a fucking mountain lion. 1.00

00:24:10.000 Those cunts ate my dog. 1.00

00:24:12.000 I don't like them. 1.00

00:24:13.000 I don't trust them.

00:24:14.000 They're just running around in our woods, and there's no shortage of them either, especially in California. 0.98

00:24:19.000 California is so goofy.

00:24:21.000 They don't have a mountain lion season in California because we don't have a Department of Fish and Game in California. 0.91

00:24:27.000 We have a Department of Fish and Wildlife.

00:24:30.000 It has a totally different nomenclature attached to it.

00:24:34.000 And because of that, It's run by wildlife lovers more than it's run by hunting advisors.

00:24:41.000 In every other state, they look at the game numbers, they look at the mountain lions, and they try to manage it accordingly.

00:24:48.000 And they also try to manage it because you get a lot of money from hunting tags.

00:24:52.000 In California, they're less concerned with that.

00:24:55.000 And because of that, they lose out on a lot of money on hunting tax because they'll have less hunters because they literally have less deer.

00:25:02.000 And the reason why they have less deer is because they have more mountain lions.

00:25:05.000 It's a real controversial thing with hunting in California as opposed to with every other state.

00:25:12.000 It's interesting.

00:25:13.000 It's all interesting stuff.

00:25:15.000 It's like what what people decide and not decide that you can eat because there's all or what you can kill because in these places where they have these hunting laws you just drive down the street like California drive down any street and you're just gonna pass by Jack in the Box and Burger King and chicken places and they're filled filled yeah California finally has wolves yay great wolves pack of wolves fantastic Wait. 0.99

00:25:41.000 This is going to be a fucking disaster. 0.97

00:25:43.000 Did we put them there or did they just kind of... 1.00

00:25:44.000 Well, we put them in Idaho.

00:25:46.000 We put them in a lot of other states and they're making their way down to California now.

00:25:49.000 And what's the purpose of having wolves to kill what? 1.00

00:25:51.000 Because people are assholes. 1.00

00:25:53.000 They forget. 1.00

00:25:54.000 They forget.

00:25:55.000 There was a story that I tweeted the other day about...

00:26:00.000 Famous strongmen throughout history famous athletes throughout history and one of them was a guy who tried to Split these two trees and he got stuck in between the two trees and he got eaten by wolves This is like in the you know the BC days But,

00:26:18.000 I mean, we've talked about this numerous times on the podcast, how many people throughout history have been eaten by wolves.

00:26:25.000 That was a huge issue until people started killing the fuck out of wolves. 0.91

00:26:30.000 And that's why we look at wolves now like they're our dogs. 0.99

00:26:34.000 We look at them like they're pets.

00:26:36.000 They were never pets before.

00:26:38.000 They were always these terrifying animals that That killed human beings.

00:26:43.000 That's why they were always a part of folklore.

00:26:44.000 That's why they were always a part of stories like the Little Red Riding Hood story or Goldilocks.

00:26:51.000 I mean, there's always the three pigs.

00:26:52.000 There was always stories of the big bad wolf because wolves were something that everybody was really scared of.

00:26:58.000 The wolves in Paris story from the 1400s. 0.99

00:27:00.000 Wolves killed, I think it was something like 40 people in Paris, France in the 1400s before they fucking rallied together and killed these goddamn things. 0.99

00:27:12.000 During World War I, the Russians and the Germans literally stopped shooting each other. 1.00

00:27:18.000 They had a ceasefire so they could kill wolves.

00:27:21.000 Because there were so many people getting killed by wolves, these soldiers would be on patrol and they would never find them. 1.00

00:27:27.000 They're like, what the fuck? 0.99

00:27:28.000 And they'd go and they'd find like a foot that was still stuck in a boot. 1.00

00:27:31.000 Yeah, and their bodies would be eaten.

00:27:33.000 Wolves would just, they were getting these super packs of wolves, of a hundred wolves together, and they would just kill people.

00:27:39.000 That's always been the case.

00:27:40.000 Just we eradicated them from our lives, and we no longer have a threat of wolves.

00:27:45.000 But now they implanted them, they took them from Canada, where they have a real problem with them, where, like I said, in BC, you can kill as many wolves as you want.

00:27:54.000 You can go to BC right now and you can kill 50 wolves today. 0.98

00:27:58.000 If you could find 50 wolves, you can kill them all. 1.00

00:28:00.000 And they want you to. 1.00

00:28:01.000 Because they're hard to kill.

00:28:02.000 They're hard to find. 1.00

00:28:03.000 They're smart as shit. 1.00

00:28:04.000 They work together in packs and they decimate moose populations. 1.00

00:28:09.000 They decimate elk, deer, cows, whatever the fuck they get ahold of. 1.00

00:28:13.000 They'll eat your dog. 1.00

00:28:14.000 They'll eat everything they get ahold of.

00:28:16.000 And that's what they do.

00:28:17.000 They run around and they eat things.

00:28:18.000 So some... 0.99

00:28:20.000 I'm sure goofy liberal conservationists decided to take these wolves and bring them from northern Canada and these big ass fucking gray wolves and bring them down to America. 0.99

00:28:34.000 Here's a picture that Jamie just pulled out. 0.99

00:28:36.000 Wolf attack. 0.75

00:28:37.000 Scroll down so I can read that again.

00:28:39.000 Wolf attack leads to state of emergency in Siberia's and Russia's Siberia region.

00:28:45.000 It was two years ago.

00:28:46.000 There was 400 wolves in a super pack running around.

00:28:49.000 Jesus. 1.00

00:28:50.000 Fuckin' up people. 0.99

00:28:51.000 The governor of Russia's largest region has declared a state of emergency after a surge of wolf attacks. 1.00

00:28:57.000 Fuck wolves, man. 1.00

00:28:59.000 People are just so goofy. 1.00

00:29:01.000 We have this beautiful thing that we've created. 0.88

00:29:05.000 We've created an amazing thing in cities.

00:29:08.000 You know, you go to the grocery store, you get your food, you walk down the street, you hold hands for your kids, no one's looking over their shoulder for bears.

00:29:16.000 And because of that we have this real detachment from the rest of the natural world that is outside of our cities.

00:29:22.000 And we live our whole lives in these cities and our perspective of animals is completely shaped by these cities. 0.98

00:29:30.000 But these animals out there don't give a fuck about you. 1.00

00:29:34.000 They don't give a fuck about your city. 1.00

00:29:36.000 They exist to eat and kill things. 1.00

00:29:38.000 They don't have language. 1.00

00:29:39.000 They don't have culture.

00:29:41.000 They don't care about you. 0.99

00:29:43.000 And all our ideas about them are all from the Lion King and some fucking goofy-ass cartoons and movies, the anthropomorphized versions of these animals. 1.00

00:29:54.000 It's really ridiculous. 1.00

00:29:56.000 And that's where all this Cecil the Lion King shit comes from. 1.00

00:30:00.000 Cecil the Lion King. 1.00

00:30:03.000 That's where all this Cecil outrage comes from. 0.80

00:30:06.000 Meanwhile, Justin Wren, who was on the podcast yesterday, told us that 5,000 children under the age of five die every day in Africa from bad water. 0.91

00:30:18.000 Every day 5,000 human babies die because they don't have water and we're worried about a lion that by the way killed Who knows how many other lion babies because that's what they do when you see a male lion and he is successful and he runs a pride Yeah run fucking T that lion has been killing baby male lions because that's what they do and When the babies are born and it's not theirs, 0.99

00:30:46.000 they just fucking slaughter them. 0.99

00:30:49.000 They slaughter them. 1.00

00:30:50.000 When they go into a new kingdom and they take over and they fuck some females and she's got males, little male babies, they fucking slaughter them. 1.00

00:30:58.000 They chase them down and they kill them. 1.00

00:31:00.000 I put a video up of it on Twitter.

00:31:03.000 People went crazy.

00:31:04.000 They went nuts. 1.00

00:31:05.000 Call me an asshole for putting up a video of nature. 1.00

00:31:08.000 It's nature. 1.00

00:31:09.000 This is what happens.

00:31:11.000 So these people that are happy now.

00:31:13.000 We finally have wolves in California.

00:31:15.000 It's amazing.

00:31:17.000 One day you'll be walking with your little cocker spaniel and a wolf's gonna come along and eat you and the cocker spaniel. 0.98

00:31:23.000 It's been a hundred years, almost, since we've had wolves in California.

00:31:26.000 So I think that's what they're more amazed at.

00:31:29.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:31:29.000 These people are so fucking stupid. 1.00

00:31:31.000 Why don't they bring back dinosaurs? 1.00

00:31:33.000 We need more dinosaurs.

00:31:34.000 We're going to bring back dinosaurs to Arizona.

00:31:37.000 Arizona was an amazing place when dinosaurs roamed.

00:31:40.000 They used to fly.

00:31:41.000 They used to fly.

00:31:43.000 We're going to have pterodactyls.

00:31:45.000 Launch our first pterodactyl, governor.

00:31:47.000 Yay! 0.99

00:31:48.000 They're going to open up the cage.

00:31:49.000 Ah! 1.00

00:31:51.000 He's gonna swoop right back, kill the governor. 0.95

00:31:55.000 Somebody released a funny video where they showed that photo of Steven Spielberg in front of the dinosaur, and they went to people on the street and go, what do you think about that? 0.85

00:32:03.000 And almost everybody was just like, I can't believe he did that.

00:32:08.000 You should be held accountable.

00:32:11.000 A fake triceratops, right?

00:32:13.000 Yeah.

00:32:13.000 I guess Nestle water just got caught from stealing a bunch of natural water, and so a lot of people are protesting Nestle for stealing California water while we're in this huge drought.

00:32:25.000 Come on.

00:32:26.000 That's real?

00:32:28.000 Yeah, Nestle pays only $524 to extract 27 million gallons of California drinking water.

00:32:36.000 Come on.

00:32:37.000 There's like four companies that get exempt from that water ban. 1.00

00:32:41.000 What the fuck? 0.99

00:32:42.000 And they can sell it? 1.00

00:32:44.000 Yeah, the bottled water and alcohol and all sorts of things. 0.99

00:32:47.000 What kind of goofy deals have these assholes made with politicians that they could steal water during a drought and then sell it to us? 0.99

00:32:55.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:32:56.000 That's insane.

00:32:57.000 For $524, they stole 27 million gallons of water from 12 Springs and Strawberry Canyon for the brand.

00:33:05.000 Oh my god. 0.88

00:33:06.000 Isn't that ridiculous? 0.87

00:33:07.000 But yeah, we can't wash our car or take over a five minute shower. 0.59

00:33:11.000 Corporate America, folks.

00:33:13.000 Corporate America.

00:33:15.000 You know, corporations are beautiful in a lot of ways.

00:33:19.000 That's why we have these microphones.

00:33:21.000 That's why we have these laptops.

00:33:24.000 That's why we have cell phones.

00:33:26.000 It's all corporations that created them.

00:33:28.000 But corporations, they're all about infinite growth.

00:33:31.000 They constantly want to make more money.

00:33:33.000 Every year they're supposed to make more money.

00:33:35.000 If a corporation makes X amount of money one year and then the same X amount of money the next year, they're a failure.

00:33:43.000 Which is hilarious. 0.97

00:33:45.000 That's ridiculous.

00:33:46.000 Like if they made, like if Apple, Apple makes like whatever they make. 0.71

00:33:50.000 Let's just make a number.

00:33:52.000 Apple made $4 billion this year, right?

00:33:54.000 If they make $4 billion next year, they failed.

00:33:57.000 You're supposed to make $4 billion plus, the new money.

00:34:02.000 It's incredible, man.

00:34:03.000 It says here, the most popular size bottle of Arrowhead is one liter, and it retails for 89 cents, putting the potential profit for Nestle in the tens of billions.

00:34:15.000 So they're just making billions of dollars on water that they've taken from us while we're going through a drought.

00:34:22.000 It only costs 89 cents for a one liter bottle of water.

00:34:24.000 Why do I feel like it costs more?

00:34:26.000 Because vending machines?

00:34:27.000 Vending machines are always like a buck fifty, right?

00:34:29.000 Oh yeah, vending machines are super overpriced. 0.69

00:34:31.000 The whole thing is gross. 0.75

00:34:32.000 It's gross. 0.83

00:34:34.000 It's gross across the board.

00:34:36.000 And it's also gross that there's a lot of crops that use this water, and there's a lot of waste involved, apparently.

00:34:47.000 There have been bills that were passed, like Arnold Schwarzenegger, when he was governor, said that they had come up with a solution, at least a partial solution.

00:34:57.000 And he was bringing it up to one of the other politicians and the politician was saying, even though this is an effective solution, I could never bring it before my people.

00:35:06.000 I can never endorse it because my people are the agricultural people and those are the people that keep me in office.

00:35:12.000 So I'm going to just tell you right now, well, we're just going to create a bunch of red tape and it'll never get passed.

00:35:18.000 And even though it's logical and it makes sense, I'll never support it. 0.99

00:35:21.000 He was like, what the fuck? 0.97

00:35:23.000 Like, this is what's wrong with politics, and this is what's wrong when you're dealing with people that are not really the representation. 0.99

00:35:30.000 They're not really representatives of people.

00:35:32.000 They're representatives of whoever got them in office.

00:35:35.000 They can pretend to be the representatives of the people.

00:35:38.000 Sort of like late-night preachers pretend to be the servants of God.

00:35:42.000 Really, they're just making money.

00:35:44.000 They're making money, and they're, you know...

00:35:46.000 You're supposed to give 10%.

00:35:48.000 Yeah.

00:35:48.000 Well, late night preachers, they don't even want 10%.

00:35:51.000 They want everything you got.

00:35:53.000 One of the funniest things that they have conned people into doing is they figured out a way to tell people, like, I know you don't have any money.

00:36:03.000 I know.

00:36:04.000 I know times is tough.

00:36:06.000 But what you have to understand is you have to have faith in the Lord.

00:36:09.000 Give everything you can.

00:36:10.000 The Lord will give you that back tenfold.

00:36:13.000 Like they tell you, if you're broke.

00:36:15.000 So they're going after people who are desperate and broke.

00:36:18.000 And they had all these people that would give these speeches.

00:36:22.000 They would talk about what happened to them.

00:36:24.000 And they were saying, well, you know, I was broke, and I didn't have any money, and times were tough, and I was wondering how I was going to take my bills and how I was going to pay for food, but I had this $100 that I was going to use towards my rent, but I said, you know what?

00:36:37.000 I'm giving this $100 to God, and everybody starts cheering and clapping, and then from that, oh, Lord, I got a new job, and I got a new car, and everything happened, and people are clapping and cheering, and music starts playing, and they build it up, and they're just,

00:36:53.000 like, making you come. 0.96

00:36:57.000 It's like this stimulation thing that they're doing, and they're actively targeting people so stupid that they really can't do anything about it. 0.97

00:37:06.000 Like these people, it's like the right people to rip off, because these people are broke, and the reality is most people who are severely broke, they're gonna stay broke. 0.97

00:37:16.000 The vast majority, whatever it is, 60, 70, 80%, pick a number, they're gonna stay broke.

00:37:23.000 And so that's the ones that they go after.

00:37:26.000 Nobody cares.

00:37:28.000 Nobody cares about them.

00:37:28.000 You rip certain people off, people get really frustrated and angry.

00:37:33.000 And you rip other people off...

00:37:35.000 Do you think in the future that's going to be not as big of a problem?

00:37:41.000 Do you think religion's shrinking or growing? 1.00

00:37:44.000 I think religion is probably overall shrinking, but stupid people are always going to exist. 0.96

00:37:50.000 And so if you call it a religion, or if you call it a cult, I mean, there's a lot of organizations that don't necessarily have some sort of a deity at the top of their structure, but they're still the same thing. 0.98

00:38:04.000 It's one person who is, or one group of people, whether it's Scientology or anything else, One group of people that is offering you a solution for how to live your life, and they have all these guidelines that they have set up,

00:38:20.000 and they want you to contribute, and they want your money.

00:38:22.000 They want your money, and they want your time, and they want you to donate.

00:38:26.000 Did you see Going Clear?

00:38:28.000 Have you seen that?

00:38:29.000 Mm-hmm. 0.99

00:38:29.000 How fucking scary was that? 0.99

00:38:32.000 I think that any kind of cult like that is... 0.99

00:38:36.000 I just saw a celebrity wife swap. 1.00

00:38:40.000 I know this sounds weird, but Corey Feldman and Tommy Davidson were the two people that switched.

00:38:45.000 And they really showed you an inside look of how Corey Feldman treats his Corey angels, is what he calls them.

00:38:53.000 He's trying to do kind of like a cross between Hugh Hefner and Michael Jackson or something like that.

00:38:58.000 He pretty much has brainwashed these girls to follow anything he says and includes a contract that they have to sign. 0.83

00:39:09.000 Okay.

00:39:10.000 Well, you know that Corey was an actor his whole life.

00:39:13.000 Right. 0.99

00:39:13.000 And you know he's probably a bullshit artist and it's most likely that this is a hustle. 0.99

00:39:18.000 Hustle maybe, but I know a girl, let me say this right, I know a girl that knows a girl, and that girl used to be one of his angels, and she left because it was too cult-like, 0.99

00:39:33.000 and the things that you had to do, once a week they would have an orgy.

00:39:39.000 And then they would just do drugs, have an orgy, have people over.

00:39:43.000 And then the days after that orgy, you would work out, do yoga, eat healthy. 0.78

00:39:48.000 And she said to her friend how it was just like brainwashed girls looking for their chance in Hollywood. 1.00

00:39:57.000 And he would be like, oh no, you join this and you follow my plan.

00:40:02.000 Anyways, the episode goes really into that.

00:40:05.000 And it's watching them talk And watching how he reacts to the wife swap part of it, it's very interesting.

00:40:14.000 It almost seems to me that whatever had happened in his past, maybe with Michael Jackson or his childhood, is really affecting him as an adult because he's very...

00:40:27.000 Like, he's not making any sense.

00:40:29.000 He's just like...

00:40:30.000 Well, he's done a ton of drugs, first of all.

00:40:32.000 Right.

00:40:32.000 And, you know, I know a guy who was in, like, a swap situation before with no need to name celebrity.

00:40:42.000 Right.

00:40:42.000 It was the same kind of thing.

00:40:44.000 This guy, like, let his wife fuck other people and then we're all together. 1.00

00:40:48.000 And he, you know, he came out of it. 1.00

00:40:50.000 And one of the things that he said to me when he came out of it, he was like, you know, he told me the story. 0.99

00:40:54.000 He goes, listen, man, they're all fucked up. 1.00

00:40:56.000 Anybody that's involved in that kind of situation is fucked up. 1.00

00:40:59.000 Like, they're all crazy. 1.00

00:41:00.000 Like, that's part of what it is. 1.00

00:41:01.000 But if you're in Hollywood and you're in, like, that, like, wannabe showbiz circle, there's plenty of fucked up people. 0.99

00:41:07.000 You can find plenty of people. 0.94

00:41:09.000 And if you can come up with some sort of a name for it, Corey's Angels or whatever the hell he calls it, yeah.

00:41:15.000 You could do it. 1.00

00:41:17.000 L. Ron Hubbard was a fucking moron. 1.00

00:41:19.000 He was a moron. 1.00

00:41:21.000 His books were terrible. 1.00

00:41:24.000 They were terrible.

00:41:25.000 If you listen to him talk, he was not a charming guy.

00:41:30.000 He was not articulate.

00:41:31.000 He wasn't brilliant.

00:41:33.000 He wasn't this guy that had this point. 1.00

00:41:35.000 Even David Koresh, although he's a dipshit and he played stupid songs or the fucking idiot in Australia that claims he's Jesus, they have a certain amount Of confidence and smoothness to them L. Ron Hubbard didn't have any of that and meanwhile Scientology became a gigantic organization. 0.99

00:41:53.000 I think for a lot of people The structure any sort of structure is comforting and they're looking for something So like you know to get back to the original point is religion going away There's gonna have to be something big that happens to human beings for religion to go away and I wonder if that big thing People would have to be able to clearly see what you know and what you don't know. 0.99

00:42:21.000 It would have to be a fundamental change in how we communicate.

00:42:24.000 Because when someone tells you, I know that if you give that $100, the Lord will pay you back tenfold! 0.99

00:42:31.000 If you say that to someone who's stupid, they go, God, he knows. 0.99

00:42:35.000 He knows the Lord will pay me back. 1.00

00:42:37.000 I've got to give that money, and the Lord is going to pay me back tenfold!

00:42:41.000 You know, you really believe it.

00:42:43.000 But if you could see that, oh, he doesn't really know that.

00:42:45.000 If there was like a light bulb that went over a person's head when they were telling the truth.

00:42:49.000 Or you could look in their eyes and you could see the numbers.

00:42:52.000 Like there was actual, you know, like a turkey tester?

00:42:54.000 You ever, you know, gobble, gobble, gobble?

00:42:56.000 You ever see those...

00:42:58.000 The temperature gauge?

00:42:58.000 Yeah, those things that put...

00:42:59.000 Pops out.

00:42:59.000 They don't use those anymore.

00:43:01.000 They probably leak fucking chemicals. 0.99

00:43:03.000 You're probably not supposed to have plastic inside a turkey that you're cooking. 1.00

00:43:06.000 But something along those lines.

00:43:09.000 Like a temperature gauge or a number or something where you could see whether or not someone's being honest.

00:43:14.000 Where they really know what they're saying or whether or not they're bullshitting.

00:43:18.000 Yeah.

00:43:19.000 What's interesting about this Corey Feldman thing... 1.00

00:43:22.000 You're stuck on that shit. 1.00

00:43:23.000 If you watch it, you'll be as... 1.00

00:43:24.000 I mean, I went frantic on it.

00:43:26.000 I'm not gonna watch it.

00:43:27.000 Can we watch a little clip of him introducing you, his angels? 0.99

00:43:30.000 We're gonna get kicked off of YouTube for your fucking Corey Feldman obsession. 0.99

00:43:33.000 Would we? 1.00

00:43:34.000 Probably.

00:43:35.000 Probably.

00:43:35.000 Well, we can watch it over there, right?

00:43:36.000 Can we watch it over there and not really watch it?

00:43:39.000 We can watch it, but we can't...

00:43:41.000 Can we play volume?

00:43:43.000 Maybe.

00:43:44.000 Maybe.

00:43:45.000 Maybe.

00:43:45.000 Alright, we'll see what happens.

00:43:47.000 Jamie's got good editing skills. 0.99

00:43:48.000 Alright, play that bitch over here and freak me out. 1.00

00:43:51.000 Go ahead. 1.00

00:43:56.000 These are the girls? 0.94

00:43:56.000 This is not it. 0.94

00:43:57.000 I was like, that girl's hot.

00:44:00.000 How's he getting that?

00:44:03.000 But it's the one right here.

00:44:06.000 Meet Corey Feldman and his angels.

00:44:08.000 The former child actor, scroll down, lives an eccentric and avant-garde lifestyle with his angels.

00:44:15.000 What?

00:44:16.000 Yeah.

00:44:16.000 Avant-garde?

00:44:17.000 What does avant-garde mean?

00:44:18.000 Oh, look at him.

00:44:19.000 I'm Corey Feldman.

00:44:20.000 You probably know me from Lost Boys, Goonies, Stand By Me.

00:44:24.000 I'm the prime of my youth, and I'll only be young once.

00:44:28.000 I started acting and singing simultaneously.

00:44:31.000 I've been a singer and musician for several decades now.

00:44:35.000 I am a bit eccentric, a bit avant-garde, but if I was just like everybody else, I wouldn't be on your TV sets.

00:44:44.000 Ooh.

00:44:45.000 I have helped a lot of women with their careers in Hollywood. 0.94

00:44:50.000 And then I would realize they went off to be successful, and what did I get out of it?

00:44:54.000 Not much.

00:44:56.000 That's why I developed my company, Cory's Angels.

00:44:59.000 Cory's Angels is a management, production, and development business comprised of beautiful, talented women. 1.00

00:45:07.000 Girls sign a contract with us so that when they do succeed, I can get rewards as well for the work that I've put into them. 1.00

00:45:15.000 What?

00:45:16.000 When the girls become angels, they move into my house. 1.00

00:45:19.000 I see why you're obsessed now. 0.99

00:45:22.000 You fucking dragged me in. 0.97

00:45:24.000 I'm Lynn, I'm a professional actress, model, and I'm one of Corey's angels. 0.99

00:45:27.000 I am Caitlin, and I am an aspiring actress, professional model, and Corey's angel in training.

00:45:33.000 I'm Courtney, I'm a DJ, and I'm Corey's mangel.

00:45:37.000 Hello, hello.

00:45:39.000 Also, I'm his girlfriend.

00:45:41.000 Cory has changed my life in so many ways.

00:45:43.000 He uses his own connections to help me be successful.

00:45:48.000 He's sexy and gorgeous and I love him.

00:45:51.000 Thanks.

00:45:54.000 Is this a polyamorous relationship?

00:45:56.000 As far as what happens behind closed doors, it stays behind closed doors.

00:46:00.000 Exactly.

00:46:04.000 We have a very kind of strict regimen.

00:46:07.000 Rule number one, we will put them on the angel diet.

00:46:09.000 That means no meat of any kind.

00:46:12.000 I'm a fruitarian, which means that I only eat fruit.

00:46:16.000 Number two, exercise! 0.64

00:46:18.000 I like watching you guys hop.

00:46:20.000 Number three, we don't allow men on the property unless they're invited guests.

00:46:26.000 That's how you do it.

00:46:28.000 This lifestyle is not for the close-minded or faint of heart.

00:46:32.000 I strive every day to do God's will. 0.97

00:46:36.000 So he makes these girls wear these slutty outfits. 1.00

00:46:39.000 They have to wear these bra and lingeries. 1.00

00:46:42.000 They're not allowed to wear clothes.

00:46:43.000 Hold up.

00:46:43.000 This is on ABC? Yeah.

00:46:45.000 He's on ABC. ABC's going desperado, huh?

00:46:49.000 They're desperate as fuck. 1.00

00:46:50.000 Network TV is desperate. 1.00

00:46:51.000 Yeah.

00:46:52.000 And what was really sad is that Tommy Davidson was the guy that they swapped with, and he has, like, a nice family, kids, and so they brought the angel over to his house, and the angel's, like, getting, like, bachelor parties and naked people in his house in front of his kids.

00:47:10.000 Okay, okay.

00:47:11.000 You know that they arranged that.

00:47:13.000 The producers arranged that.

00:47:14.000 He seemed pretty pissed off.

00:47:16.000 He just left the house. 1.00

00:47:17.000 He's like, what the fuck? 1.00

00:47:18.000 Of course he did. 1.00

00:47:19.000 Well, yeah, I'm sure there's fake shit to it. 0.99

00:47:21.000 This is all 100% fake. 0.99

00:47:22.000 100% arranged.

00:47:23.000 This is all planned out. 0.99

00:47:25.000 Corey has his fucking one piece of hair waxed that hangs strategically in front of his face. 0.99

00:47:30.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:47:31.000 I mean, this is a scam.

00:47:32.000 What this is is Corey's shot at getting back on TV. And what he's doing is getting those girls with him, and it's working.

00:47:39.000 It's getting them exposure.

00:47:40.000 They're getting on TV. So his plan is to be this guy who's the ringleader.

00:47:46.000 I'm Corey.

00:47:47.000 These are Corey's angels.

00:47:48.000 This is the hustle we're going to get on ABC. And he's getting it for them.

00:47:52.000 But whether or not this is all real...

00:47:54.000 He's been doing the angel thing for a long time.

00:47:55.000 Of course, because this is his hustle.

00:47:57.000 This is how he's getting some form.

00:47:59.000 It's like a pyramid scam.

00:48:01.000 Sort of.

00:48:02.000 I mean, this is his entertainment shtick.

00:48:04.000 This is how he's getting some form of attention.

00:48:08.000 When these girls leave the Angels, he has contracts that he gets a percentage of everything they make from that on. 0.97

00:48:16.000 Good.

00:48:16.000 Good luck.

00:48:17.000 You're going to get 50 bucks from the chick who works at Gatonna now. 1.00

00:48:22.000 What is he going to make? 0.99

00:48:23.000 I mean, if they do get big, they'll have him killed. 1.00

00:48:27.000 You know, if one of those girls gets huge, she becomes the next Rihanna or whoever the fuck she is, she'll have that guy killed. 1.00

00:48:33.000 Please watch it, though. 1.00

00:48:33.000 It's on Hulu. 1.00

00:48:35.000 Just smoke a joint, watch this. 1.00

00:48:37.000 Cut the brakes of his VW bug and push him off a fucking cliff. 1.00

00:48:41.000 He's an asshole. 1.00

00:48:42.000 Do you have that video of him at the baseball game? 1.00

00:48:45.000 He took his band.

00:48:46.000 You're obsessed.

00:48:47.000 This is crazy.

00:48:49.000 He took his band and he opened up or he played at a minor league baseball club.

00:48:57.000 Game.

00:48:57.000 And he...

00:48:59.000 Just watch it. 0.99

00:49:01.000 It's pretty ridiculous. 1.00

00:49:02.000 You are fucking obsessed. 1.00

00:49:04.000 So Chip, here's this band. 0.99

00:49:05.000 By the way, none of these instruments...

00:49:08.000 Somebody told me none of these instruments are actually...

00:49:10.000 They're not actually playing these instruments.

00:49:12.000 Of course they're not.

00:49:13.000 What do you think?

00:49:14.000 You should be real about that?

00:49:15.000 Well, they're authentic with their art.

00:49:19.000 Oh, he's still doing the Michael Jackson thing.

00:49:22.000 That's why he has his hair like that.

00:49:23.000 State College Spikes?

00:49:25.000 What does that mean?

00:49:26.000 It's a baseball team.

00:49:27.000 Yeah, it's like a minor league baseball team.

00:49:34.000 People don't know what to do.

00:49:35.000 Look at them.

00:49:36.000 There's only like 20 people in the audience and they're looking at this like it's a...

00:49:40.000 Look at that one white guy bouncing around.

00:49:42.000 He even stopped.

00:49:44.000 He bounced for a little and people are like, what are you doing?

00:49:46.000 Oh yeah, you're right.

00:49:47.000 What am I doing?

00:49:48.000 Look at this guy with his camera.

00:49:50.000 I'm gonna show my kid. 1.00

00:49:52.000 The guy on stage, bottom right, just laughing his ass off at how ridiculous this shit is. 1.00

00:49:57.000 Look at him with his fucking shiny pants. 1.00

00:50:00.000 That guy is so bizarre. 1.00

00:50:03.000 And look at the girls. 1.00

00:50:05.000 But listen, man, if you're that guy and you have to be the guy that lets these girls fuck other guys because otherwise they're gonna get bored with you. 1.00

00:50:14.000 You weigh 15 pounds and you're a fucking freak. 1.00

00:50:16.000 He doesn't let guys into his... 1.00

00:50:17.000 Of course he does, dude.

00:50:19.000 They might not go into his house, but they have orgies. 1.00

00:50:22.000 They don't just have orgies with him. 1.00

00:50:25.000 Okay, other dudes are giving those girls dick. 1.00

00:50:27.000 Guaranteed. 1.00

00:50:28.000 Macaulay Culkin.

00:50:31.000 He threw the hat down!

00:50:32.000 Jesus! 1.00

00:50:34.000 That guy's like, what the fuck? 1.00

00:50:35.000 The girl's like, get the hat, get the hat! 1.00

00:50:38.000 Someone's gonna toss it back to him here in a second.

00:50:45.000 Oh my god.

00:50:47.000 What is this song?

00:50:50.000 He's trying to be Michael Jackson.

00:50:52.000 Well, he's like a combination of Michael Jackson and something else.

00:50:56.000 Charlie Sheen.

00:50:56.000 Eddie Vedder.

00:50:58.000 Eddie Vedder.

00:50:59.000 He's really weirdly pale, too.

00:51:01.000 Oh, here he is.

00:51:02.000 He's breaking it down for you.

00:51:03.000 He's breaking it down.

00:51:08.000 He can't make eye contact with people because they're all like looking at him like he's a freak.

00:51:13.000 So like he's doing all this crazy dancing and they're not reacting.

00:51:16.000 It's very strange.

00:51:18.000 And he doesn't look at them.

00:51:20.000 He's sort of like looking like At like their knee area. 0.57

00:51:24.000 You know what I mean?

00:51:25.000 There aren't a lot.

00:51:27.000 He did the Michael Jackson thing with the dancing.

00:51:29.000 He threw his hat again! 1.00

00:51:31.000 I would steal that fucking hat. 1.00

00:51:32.000 I would steal that fucking hat. 1.00

00:51:34.000 It's on the ground. 1.00

00:51:35.000 Why isn't anybody going for it? 1.00

00:51:36.000 These people are pussies. 1.00

00:51:37.000 Someone go. 1.00

00:51:38.000 You had your chance.

00:51:39.000 Look at the...

00:51:40.000 Oh, he's got tangled up in some cords and the angel had to rescue him.

00:51:44.000 He's tangled. 0.99

00:51:44.000 He's fucking tangled. 0.99

00:51:46.000 Look how little the stage is. 1.00

00:51:47.000 There's cords everywhere.

00:51:49.000 Is there like a hot air balloon holding those cords up?

00:51:51.000 Why is there cords that go straight up into the sky?

00:51:54.000 Why wouldn't he just stay in one place?

00:51:56.000 He was complaining that he got set up on this whole event.

00:51:59.000 Set up? 1.00

00:51:59.000 Yeah, that someone fucked him. 1.00

00:52:01.000 That's why he... 1.00

00:52:02.000 Why that's so bad.

00:52:03.000 How could someone set him up?

00:52:05.000 He's dancing.

00:52:07.000 They're saying that.

00:52:07.000 Because there's no one there?

00:52:08.000 Yeah, it was after a baseball game.

00:52:10.000 It was unprofessional and yadda yadda yadda. 1.00

00:52:14.000 Oh my god, he's an idiot. 1.00

00:52:15.000 He lost his Special Olympics gig because of this video. 1.00

00:52:20.000 What?

00:52:20.000 He was supposed to play the Special Olympics gig, and he lost it after this video supposedly, and he's upset about it.

00:52:27.000 The Special Olympics?

00:52:28.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:52:28.000 Can you imagine if he got booed by retarded people? 0.99

00:52:30.000 But this is shit! 1.00

00:52:32.000 I shouldn't say retarded because they have Down Syndrome. 1.00

00:52:36.000 Trans-tarded? 1.00

00:52:37.000 There's something wrong with them.

00:52:38.000 Retarded is not a real word. 1.00

00:52:40.000 That's why I resent the fact that you're not supposed to use retarded for people that are idiots. 1.00

00:52:45.000 And then I went and used it for people that have legitimate issues. 1.00

00:52:50.000 He might be retarded. 1.00

00:52:53.000 There's something wrong. 0.98

00:52:54.000 There's something definitely wrong.

00:52:56.000 But it's also like, there's that thing that happens when you become like a Gary Coleman or like someone who's a personal, you're a punchline.

00:53:03.000 And you're kind of on the outside like that, where they get real freaky.

00:53:07.000 They get, like, they get desperado and it all becomes one attempt after the next to try to get attention.

00:53:14.000 You know, you see it a lot from reality stars that, like, their 15 minutes ends and then they start scrambling to try to, like, do new stunts and new different things.

00:53:24.000 Do you remember that kid who was on The Real World?

00:53:28.000 His name was Puck.

00:53:29.000 Puck.

00:53:29.000 Is he dead?

00:53:30.000 No, I saw him on Sunset, like, maybe a year ago I saw him on Sunset.

00:53:36.000 Okay, how does a guy like that feed himself?

00:53:38.000 How does that work?

00:53:39.000 He looked like he wasn't.

00:53:41.000 But what does a guy like that do for a gig?

00:53:44.000 For a while, I bet he made money.

00:53:45.000 I mean, he was around 20 years ago though, but he probably made money on appearances for like 10 years just being Puck.

00:53:51.000 We still know his name.

00:53:52.000 Hmm, I guess. 1.00

00:53:53.000 I pulled it out of the back of my ass. 1.00

00:53:55.000 But the reason why I know it is because he was that guy that was like always doing exaggerated things and always being ridiculous to try to get attention. 1.00

00:54:05.000 It's a lot of those fucking people, man. 0.99

00:54:07.000 I mean, that's like what the reality show world sort of creates and produces. 1.00

00:54:13.000 It looks like Puck was in prison.

00:54:15.000 He's now an ex-con. 0.98

00:54:16.000 He's now living as a makeup artist who sounds like he hates women.

00:54:21.000 He was with OJ in prison for two years.

00:54:24.000 He was?

00:54:25.000 With OJ? Wow.

00:54:28.000 He was in for stalking.

00:54:29.000 Oh my god.

00:54:31.000 Jesus Christ. 1.00

00:54:34.000 He was in fucking jail for stalking? 1.00

00:54:36.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:54:37.000 Wow.

00:54:38.000 Hmm.

00:54:40.000 Hmm.

00:54:41.000 Okay. 1.00

00:54:41.000 Poor bastard. 1.00

00:54:43.000 But you know what I mean? 1.00

00:54:44.000 That's my point, is that these people that become like a punchline, they get to that.

00:54:48.000 And also, the other thing is, being a guy like Corey Feldman, I don't know him.

00:54:53.000 I'm sure he's a fine fella.

00:54:54.000 Never met him?

00:54:55.000 Never met him.

00:54:56.000 I'm sure he's a fine fella.

00:54:57.000 I don't know.

00:54:58.000 He doesn't seem like a mean person.

00:54:59.000 He's not a hateful person. 0.98

00:55:00.000 But This is where I think it's fucked. 0.98

00:55:04.000 That guy became famous when he was a little kid. 0.99

00:55:07.000 And I think when you become famous when you're a little kid, your odds of developing as an adult, like a guy that we can hang out with and talk to, just a normal, balanced person, they're almost fucking none.

00:55:21.000 I've only met a couple of people that I know were famous when they were young that I could hang out with and talk to.

00:55:27.000 Like Ricky Schroeder, he's one of them.

00:55:29.000 Ricky's pretty goddamn normal for someone who has grown up in the public eye, but he has been kind of out of the public eye for a long time, and he's got a family. 0.58

00:55:39.000 He's very close to his family. 0.94

00:55:41.000 He's got a lot of interests.

00:55:42.000 He makes documentaries.

00:55:43.000 He hunts.

00:55:45.000 Ricky's a different sort of cat.

00:55:47.000 So he's like one of the few that like was famous when he was young that I could hang out with.

00:55:52.000 No problem.

00:55:53.000 Wouldn't you want to asterisk that maybe with like famous when young and still trying to be famous the whole time?

00:55:58.000 Because some people want to get out and they make it or they get out for a long time and they can come back.

00:56:03.000 That's a good point.

00:56:05.000 That's a very good point.

00:56:06.000 Jodie Foster.

00:56:14.000 We got some more news on Corey Feldman.

00:56:19.000 Two years ago, Corey Feldman told cops he was molested and named his abusers, but they did nothing because they were too focused on the Michael Jackson investigation, which seems suspect right there.

00:56:29.000 What does that mean?

00:56:31.000 He was abused by someone other than Michael Jackson?

00:56:33.000 Yeah, which he said that he writes the relationship with Jackson was the healthiest in his life and that he never abused him, which, you know, whatever.

00:56:40.000 But he said he was molested and he told the cops who molested him and they did nothing.

00:56:46.000 Well, why would he say that and not just say who molested him?

00:56:48.000 Exactly.

00:56:49.000 And then he spiraled into drug abuse, having regular coke-off challenges with friends and doing heroin.

00:56:54.000 Have you ever been in a coke-off?

00:56:55.000 A coke-off?

00:56:56.000 No.

00:57:00.000 No.

00:57:00.000 What's your tolerance like?

00:57:03.000 I know people that can just sit there and do coke all day long and just whatever.

00:57:07.000 I'll have like one line and be like, okay, I'm good.

00:57:10.000 Gotta calm down now.

00:57:11.000 Well, that's because you drink so much coffee.

00:57:13.000 Yeah, exactly.

00:57:14.000 You go there already elevated.

00:57:15.000 Trenta right now.

00:57:17.000 Trenta has got to be unhealthy for you.

00:57:19.000 Two shots in there, too.

00:57:20.000 You know what's worse is getting a Trenta of cold brew, which is ten times more powerful than regular coffee.

00:57:28.000 Well, it's not ten times, but it is more powerful.

00:57:31.000 Starbucks says it's ten times.

00:57:34.000 Do they?

00:57:34.000 Yeah.

00:57:34.000 We should look at that.

00:57:35.000 What is the new cold brew?

00:57:36.000 Dude, that could kill you.

00:57:38.000 If it was really ten times more powerful than regular coffee, that would literally be like that.

00:57:43.000 Have you ever seen that caffeine powder that they sell?

00:57:45.000 Yeah.

00:57:46.000 Kids have taken, like, tablespoons of caffeine powder and died.

00:57:49.000 Like, it has absolutely killed people.

00:57:51.000 And I would think that if cold brew was really ten times stronger than a regular coffee, because we have those nitro cold brews.

00:57:59.000 I had a cold brew today.

00:58:00.000 This caveman coffee. 1.00

00:58:01.000 This shit right here, this stuff is goddamn delicious. 1.00

00:58:04.000 Cold brew concentrate, you take this... 1.00

00:58:07.000 You put a third of this in a glass, and then the two-thirds water is delicious, and it's awesome. 0.98

00:58:14.000 It's strong as shit, but it's not ten times stronger. 0.96

00:58:18.000 So, a 16-ounce Starbucks cold brew coffee, 16-ounce, which is, I guess, they're small. 0.99

00:58:26.000 It's 200 milligrams.

00:58:28.000 I don't think that's the small.

00:58:29.000 I think that's the grande.

00:58:30.000 16?

00:58:31.000 200 milligrams, I think that's standard.

00:58:33.000 Standard.

00:58:34.000 Cold brew, that's 16 ounces.

00:58:37.000 I think 200 is around what it normally is.

00:58:40.000 What's called Starbucks?

00:58:42.000 What makes you say it's 10 times stronger?

00:58:44.000 Because that's what they told me at Starbucks. 1.00

00:58:45.000 Oh, that's just some asshole behind the counter. 1.00

00:58:47.000 Starbucks ice, coffee, caffeine. 1.00

00:58:48.000 I was trying to sell you a script.

00:58:50.000 Dude, it's 10 times stronger.

00:58:51.000 It was brewed on an island where they make dinosaurs.

00:58:54.000 Read my script.

00:58:58.000 A 16-ounce iced coffee has...

00:59:02.000 Let's see, where's that at?

00:59:05.000 It's not 10 times.

00:59:06.000 I mean, if it's slightly more powerful, I'd be surprised.

00:59:10.000 But, you know, Starbucks is pretty strong anyway.

00:59:13.000 Starbucks is way stronger than most coffee.

00:59:15.000 They put more coffee in the more grinds in the thing when they brew it up. 1.00

00:59:20.000 But the shit that we serve here is pretty strong. 1.00

00:59:24.000 Jamie makes it pretty goddamn... 1.00

00:59:28.000 Thick. 0.98

00:59:28.000 So iced coffee is... 0.98

00:59:30.000 Did you see Floyd Mayweather's new car?

00:59:33.000 He has a new car?

00:59:35.000 Oh, yeah.

00:59:35.000 What's he got?

00:59:36.000 I don't even...

00:59:37.000 Koenig... 0.90

00:59:37.000 Koenigsegg? 0.90

00:59:38.000 Oh, Koenigsegg.

00:59:39.000 Yeah.

00:59:40.000 CCXR? Yeah, I've seen those things before.

00:59:42.000 6.7 million, it says.

00:59:43.000 What?

00:59:44.000 Come on.

00:59:45.000 Those things don't cost 6.7 million dollars.

00:59:47.000 Most things I've seen was 4.7.

00:59:49.000 This article right here says 6.7.

00:59:50.000 One of two. 1.00

00:59:53.000 Damn. 0.99

00:59:53.000 He drove it down to Fatburger on the Strip two nights ago, and such a crowd came that he had to get a flatbed to take it home because he didn't want to drive it. 0.99

01:00:02.000 Why?

01:00:03.000 The article said he was too scared to drive it home through the crowd.

01:00:07.000 Through the crowd.

01:00:08.000 Like, he didn't want to fuck it up. 0.69

01:00:09.000 That doesn't make any sense.

01:00:11.000 Yeah, it's not ten times.

01:00:12.000 It's 40 milligrams more.

01:00:14.000 But, still, it's more.

01:00:16.000 That's some guy.

01:00:17.000 Ten times more red band.

01:00:18.000 Why would they tell me that?

01:00:19.000 Put me on dysentery.

01:00:20.000 I'll pretend that I'm a girl.

01:00:22.000 Come on, red band.

01:00:23.000 It's ten times more.

01:00:26.000 I hate when people do that.

01:00:27.000 I was posting all day on TMZ and then I came over here to work at Starbucks and I wanted you to have me on your show.

01:00:33.000 Have me on your show, man.

01:00:35.000 Come on, Red Band.

01:00:36.000 Have me on your show. 0.99

01:00:37.000 No, what's stupid is that you believe the guy worked at Starbucks. 0.97

01:00:40.000 Well, ten times seems pretty high and I thought, that doesn't seem I saw this today. 0.94

01:00:44.000 Did you see this today?

01:00:45.000 A kid fell and accidentally punched through a 1.5 million dollar painting.

01:00:50.000 Yeah.

01:00:51.000 Play that.

01:00:51.000 Play that, because it's hilarious.

01:00:53.000 First of all, how fucking stupid are they where you could just have this thing right in front of people? 1.00

01:00:59.000 Like, watch this. 1.00

01:01:00.000 Kid slips. 1.00

01:01:04.000 Holding his drink and punched through a 1.5 million dollar fucking painting. 0.99

01:01:14.000 And then this lady comes over, oh ye- what? 1.00

01:01:18.000 Get out of here! 0.99

01:01:23.000 How is that just hanging up right there?

01:01:26.000 Why don't they have it encased in glass?

01:01:28.000 By the way, I went to the LA County Museum of Art the other day.

01:01:31.000 Thank you. 1.00

01:01:32.000 It's one of the worst pieces of shit you'll ever go to. 1.00

01:01:35.000 Oh my god. 1.00

01:01:36.000 It is like a fucking scene in a movie where you mock pretentious modern art. 0.99

01:01:40.000 Dude, I'm going to show you some pictures. 1.00

01:01:42.000 And these are real fucking pictures. 0.99

01:01:43.000 Did you see the painting that was just a white painting that had nothing on it? 0.99

01:01:48.000 Or the room where there's nothing in it except a chair?

01:01:51.000 Yes.

01:01:51.000 I did.

01:01:52.000 Even better, I saw the box.

01:01:54.000 Did you see the box? 0.99

01:01:56.000 Which they're trying to say is a work of art, is a fucking plexiglass box. 0.99

01:02:01.000 Yeah. 0.99

01:02:02.000 This is it.

01:02:02.000 It's roped off.

01:02:04.000 Can you see that?

01:02:04.000 Can you focus in on that?

01:02:06.000 Just so people can see how fucking stupid this is. 1.00

01:02:08.000 And there's some sort of pretentious explanation for why this box is significant. 1.00

01:02:14.000 All it is is a fucking plexiglass box. 0.99

01:02:17.000 Yeah. 0.99

01:02:18.000 Like, if you had it in your house, it might make a cool coffee table, I guess.

01:02:21.000 Like, oh, that's a cool coffee table.

01:02:22.000 Where'd you get it?

01:02:23.000 It's a priceless piece of art from the LACMA, from L.A. County Museum of Art. 1.00

01:02:28.000 That place is dog shit. 1.00

01:02:30.000 It is one of the worst fucking museums I've ever been to in my life. 1.00

01:02:33.000 I agree. 1.00

01:02:33.000 I've gone on rants about this in the past because I love art museums. 1.00

01:02:38.000 Columbus Art Museum in Columbus, Ohio is a great museum.

01:02:41.000 Even the Huntington Library, which is here in Pasadena, I believe, is one of the best art museums I've ever been to.

01:02:48.000 This one, though, I mean, literally was a joke.

01:02:51.000 I was so pissed off after going to it of how many rooms.

01:02:54.000 You'd just walk into a room and there would just be like a shoe.

01:02:57.000 And you're just like, wait, that's it?

01:02:58.000 Well, I went with my kids, because I thought it would be fun to take the kids to the art museum.

01:03:03.000 My kids love art. 0.99

01:03:04.000 They could see some cool paintings and shit. 0.99

01:03:07.000 And I knew we were fucked when we first got there, because we walked into this room, and it looks like there's these curvy walls. 0.99

01:03:14.000 And I felt like, well, you go inside the curvy walls, there's probably some cool paintings. 0.99

01:03:18.000 No, the curvy walls were the fucking art. 1.00

01:03:21.000 And I went, no, we're fucked. 1.00

01:03:23.000 It's one of these places. 0.99

01:03:25.000 And there was all these super pretentious people that were like, please don't touch that.

01:03:30.000 Please don't touch that.

01:03:31.000 Everywhere you go, they're like, don't touch, don't touch, don't touch.

01:03:33.000 And one guy, I had my five-year-old on my shoulders.

01:03:37.000 She likes climbing on top of me. 0.97

01:03:39.000 She climbs on me all the time. 1.00

01:03:40.000 So she's sitting on my shoulder and he's like, sir, can you please take your daughter off your shoulder?

01:03:44.000 It's a safety risk.

01:03:45.000 I'm like, it's a safety risk.

01:03:47.000 For who?

01:03:48.000 For her?

01:03:49.000 I'm like, I'm not gonna drop her. 1.00

01:03:50.000 Are you out of your fucking mind? 1.00

01:03:51.000 It's a safety risk? 1.00

01:03:54.000 I highly recommend taking them to the Huntington Library.

01:03:57.000 It's a cool place where they have gardens.

01:03:59.000 They have like, I don't know how many gardens, like 10 different gardens.

01:04:02.000 I've been, yeah, it's cool.

01:04:03.000 Each garden is like a different, like, oh, I'm in Japan now.

01:04:05.000 But they also have one of the best art collections ever, including like the Blue Boy and a bunch of really famous paintings where you're like, oh, that's interesting.

01:04:13.000 That's the, you know, the original Abraham Lincoln painting or whatever it is, you know.

01:04:17.000 The LACMA, it also, what is that, a rock that they have there?

01:04:22.000 Yeah, that's one of their things. 1.00

01:04:23.000 I want to fucking hit somebody. 1.00

01:04:26.000 God damn it. 1.00

01:04:28.000 Not only that, I paid and I didn't have to pay because I'm a resident of LA County. 0.99

01:04:34.000 You get in for free.

01:04:35.000 But I said, you know what?

01:04:36.000 I want to contribute.

01:04:37.000 I want to contribute.

01:04:37.000 So I paid.

01:04:39.000 Then they had fucking jazz, which is my other least favorite thing. 0.99

01:04:43.000 They had that and jazz together. 0.99

01:04:45.000 It's like super pretentious meets uber pretentious. 1.00

01:04:48.000 And they collide in a fucking shitstorm of hipsters. 1.00

01:04:52.000 Oh my god, it was so gross. 0.99

01:04:54.000 Then on top of it, like, they have all these art books for sale, and we're like, well, maybe they have some cool art books. 0.99

01:05:00.000 And this fucking shithead with his rolled cuff jeans are like, please be careful, that's a delicate book. 0.99

01:05:06.000 I go, no, it's not a delicate book, it's a book! 1.00

01:05:09.000 It's just a book, you fuck! 1.00

01:05:11.000 It's all it is, is a book! 1.00

01:05:12.000 It's made out of paper, like regular paper, like a regular book. 1.00

01:05:16.000 You fucking clown. 1.00

01:05:18.000 That was one of the biggest disappointments of my life, because I was looking forward to it so much. 1.00

01:05:21.000 I wasn't being rough with the book.

01:05:23.000 I wasn't even touching the book.

01:05:24.000 My seven-year-old was.

01:05:25.000 But she was just gently leafing through the pages of the book.

01:05:28.000 She wasn't doing anything rough. 1.00

01:05:33.000 Assholes! 1.00

01:05:33.000 And county-funded assholes. 1.00

01:05:36.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:05:36.000 That's the gross thing, is that tax dollars go to support this. 1.00

01:05:40.000 They have one exhibit that's all junk. 0.98

01:05:42.000 It's called junk. 0.63

01:05:43.000 That's like part of the name of the exhibit.

01:05:45.000 And you go there, it's like bottle caps that are glued to like a cork board. 1.00

01:05:49.000 Like, you fucks! 1.00

01:05:51.000 You motherfuckers! 1.00

01:05:52.000 You put this on a frame and hung it on the wall, and you actually are charging people to see this? 1.00

01:05:58.000 Dog shit! 1.00

01:05:59.000 I mean, just total dog shit. 1.00

01:06:01.000 And what a waste of valuable space in Los Angeles. 1.00

01:06:04.000 I mean, there's rooms like ten times bigger than my house where it's just a light bulb.

01:06:09.000 They should just let homeless people move in. 0.99

01:06:10.000 They really should.

01:06:12.000 That should be the new museum. 1.00

01:06:13.000 It's the homeless people's shit collection. 1.00

01:06:15.000 Just let them shit all over the ground and you spray plastic on it to seal it and keep it in place forever. 1.00

01:06:21.000 Like, the homeless people turd pile. 1.00

01:06:23.000 That would be, like, more interesting than anything they had there. 1.00

01:06:26.000 If you, like, let homeless people shit, you can come in and shit, but you have to shit in this one spot. 1.00

01:06:31.000 And you go under the ropes. 1.00

01:06:32.000 There it is.

01:06:32.000 That's it.

01:06:33.000 That's the fucking, that's that fucking thing, man. 1.00

01:06:37.000 God damn it, that makes me angry. 1.00

01:06:38.000 This wall, this curvy wall, which is kind of cool, you know, if it was, like, in your house. 0.99

01:06:43.000 I'd be like, ooh, you have cool walls. 1.00

01:06:44.000 But to say that that's a piece of sculpture, the fuck it is. 1.00

01:06:49.000 Fuck you. 1.00

01:06:50.000 How about that other one in the upper right-hand corner, like the sticks? 1.00

01:06:53.000 See the sticks? 0.99

01:06:54.000 They have like a half of a fucking side of a barn. 0.99

01:06:58.000 Oh, look at us. 1.00

01:07:00.000 We're crazy. 0.96

01:07:01.000 We're crazy.

01:07:02.000 Look at the one below it that's like a half of a house.

01:07:04.000 Oh, look.

01:07:05.000 It's like, this is what a house would look like if it was here. 1.00

01:07:08.000 You fucking assholes. 1.00

01:07:10.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:07:12.000 I'm so angry.

01:07:13.000 I was angry though.

01:07:14.000 You know why I was angry?

01:07:15.000 Because I was trying to figure out which way to go.

01:07:19.000 Should we go to the Museum of Art?

01:07:21.000 Or should we go to the Museum of Natural History? 0.99

01:07:23.000 Should we see dinosaurs and cool shit from the past? 0.99

01:07:27.000 Or should we see art? 0.99

01:07:28.000 And we went with art.

01:07:29.000 Huge mistake!

01:07:31.000 Don't go again.

01:07:33.000 Massive area.

01:07:34.000 And not only that, this area is near one of the most important natural areas in Los Angeles, which is La Brea Tar Pits. 0.99

01:07:41.000 Mm-hmm See if you find the junk collection because if you want to fucking scoop your eyes out with spoons It's fucking junk collection. 1.00

01:07:51.000 Oh God God damn it. 1.00

01:07:54.000 It makes me angry. 1.00

01:07:55.000 It was so gross so gross and stupid See that one over there? 1.00

01:08:02.000 Scroll down. 1.00

01:08:03.000 The one with the feathers and the black right to the right of your cursor?

01:08:05.000 This is the tar and feather.

01:08:07.000 This is the tar and feather piece.

01:08:09.000 This represents tar and feathers.

01:08:12.000 No, it doesn't.

01:08:13.000 It's just feathers that you glued to a board and you're making people look at it. 0.98

01:08:17.000 You don't think people know what the fuck tar and feathers was? 0.99

01:08:21.000 What are you trying to say? 1.00

01:08:23.000 What are you trying to say with your shitty piece of art? 1.00

01:08:25.000 It's just like a kid's science fair. 0.99

01:08:28.000 You know what I mean?

01:08:28.000 Like when they have to do like a construction board thing.

01:08:31.000 Like Yoko Ono is somehow responsible for this museum.

01:08:34.000 Well, Yoko Ono had an exhibit that I went to see once in Boston.

01:08:37.000 And one of the exhibits was a block of wood with nails in it.

01:08:43.000 And next to that was a box of nails and a hammer.

01:08:49.000 And they asked Yoko Ono, and they said, like, what is this about?

01:08:53.000 And she said, I want people to contribute.

01:08:57.000 They be enthusiastic about the art, so they contribute.

01:09:00.000 So she encouraged people to pick up a nail. 0.57

01:09:03.000 That's it. 1.00

01:09:03.000 And hammer the fucking nail into that block of wood. 1.00

01:09:07.000 And I'm like, if you want people to be enthusiastic, take the nails... 1.00

01:09:11.000 And put them in your forehead. 0.80

01:09:12.000 Just put them right in your forehead and let people whack those. 0.96

01:09:15.000 You'll have a line around the block. 0.91

01:09:18.000 People will sign up months in advance.

01:09:20.000 Look at her art.

01:09:22.000 What does that say, incredible what?

01:09:25.000 Yoko Ono's incredible what?

01:09:27.000 Video.

01:09:28.000 They better be joking.

01:09:31.000 They better be joking.

01:09:32.000 Come on, HuffPet. 1.00

01:09:33.000 Reaffirms that she's the queen of everything.

01:09:35.000 Is that really what it says?

01:09:37.000 Oh my god.

01:09:40.000 Yoko Ono's incredible new video reaffirms she's the queen of everything.

01:09:43.000 No, she's the queen of tricking John Lennon into being with her.

01:09:48.000 Oh my god.

01:09:50.000 Yoko Ono Plastic Ono Band.

01:09:54.000 And she's like dancing and screaming. 1.00

01:09:57.000 You want to hear it?

01:09:58.000 Because it's amazing.

01:10:08.000 Oh no, what's he doing here?

01:10:09.000 Yeah, what's that dude from...

01:10:11.000 Questlove is there.

01:10:13.000 Why did you do it, Quest?

01:10:16.000 Get out of there, Quest.

01:10:18.000 I'm a bad dancer with no regrets. 1.00

01:10:21.000 Fuck. 1.00

01:10:23.000 And we got interrupted by a pop-up for Huff to post newsletter. 1.00

01:10:26.000 No, I don't want your newsletter.

01:10:27.000 No!

01:10:29.000 No, no, no, no, no!

01:10:30.000 So, see that Ted Cruz guy over there?

01:10:33.000 I know someone who's having Ted Cruz come over their house for a fundraiser because they're a big supporter of Israel.

01:10:41.000 And we're invited to go.

01:10:43.000 I'm trying to figure out if I should go.

01:10:45.000 Some people are saying I should go just for the material.

01:10:48.000 But I'm like, no, I'm just going to get angry.

01:10:50.000 I don't want to get angry.

01:10:52.000 I mean, have you ever heard that guy talk?

01:10:54.000 He's Ted Cruz.

01:10:55.000 That's a good question.

01:10:56.000 Why don't you Google Ted Cruz is a dummy and then find whatever videos they have. 0.97

01:11:01.000 He's like Sarah Palin if he was a guy with a head injury. 0.97

01:11:05.000 If Sarah Palin was a guy and he got hit in the head, he's not really running for president.

01:11:10.000 I agree with that.

01:11:12.000 Listen to him talk. 1.00

01:11:13.000 He's just so fucking stupid. 1.00

01:11:15.000 He wasn't even born in America, so I don't know how he's going to be a president. 1.00

01:11:18.000 He's born in Canadian land.

01:11:22.000 And they would never have him.

01:11:26.000 Listen to him talk.

01:11:27.000 And to coddle and appease our enemies.

01:11:30.000 And so, Putin, you better believe Putin sees in Benghazi four Americans are murdered and nothing happens.

01:11:36.000 There's no retribution.

01:11:37.000 You better believe that Putin sees that in Syria, Obama draws a red line and ignores the red line.

01:11:44.000 First of all, stop right there. 0.99

01:11:46.000 Sounds like a gay man to me. 0.99

01:11:47.000 Is that a gay man? 0.91

01:11:49.000 That does not sound, I mean, not to stereotype too late, but there's a certain, there's a reason why we have this stereotypical gay voice. 0.60

01:12:00.000 There's a reason.

01:12:01.000 Why is that reason, Brian? 1.00

01:12:03.000 Getting fucked in the ass so much it makes your voice go higher. 1.00

01:12:06.000 No, no, no, no. 1.00

01:12:07.000 No, because that's what they talk like.

01:12:10.000 Okay, listen, if I talk to you like this...

01:12:13.000 What am I? What do I sound like, Brian?

01:12:15.000 What do I sound like, Brian?

01:12:16.000 A large black man, right? 0.99

01:12:19.000 A large black man. 0.99

01:12:20.000 A confident, large black man who's threatening. 1.00

01:12:23.000 Why? 0.96

01:12:23.000 We recognize that. 0.96

01:12:24.000 These exist in nature, right?

01:12:26.000 Okay, here's one.

01:12:27.000 Ah!

01:12:27.000 What is that?

01:12:28.000 It's a bird.

01:12:28.000 Pterodactyl.

01:12:29.000 Okay?

01:12:29.000 No, pterodactyl.

01:12:30.000 Like, ah!

01:12:33.000 But you know what I'm saying?

01:12:34.000 Like, there's sounds that things make, and you go, oh, I know what that is. 1.00

01:12:38.000 My fucking gaydar says that's a gay man. 1.00

01:12:41.000 Sure. 1.00

01:12:42.000 Listen to him talk one more time, please.

01:12:44.000 First of all, I love gay people.

01:12:46.000 There's nothing wrong with gay people.

01:12:47.000 And not all gay people talk like this.

01:12:50.000 We've had gay people in the pod, like Josh Zeps, you would never know, looking at him or hearing him talk that he's gay. 0.95

01:12:56.000 Obviously he's gay. 0.90

01:12:57.000 Talks about being gay. 0.99

01:12:58.000 Unless it's a smokescreen.

01:13:00.000 This man says he's not gay. 0.99

01:13:02.000 He said, we will repeal every single word of Obamacare.

01:13:08.000 Look at those people.

01:13:09.000 Old people are clapping. 0.56

01:13:11.000 You know why the old people are clapping? 1.00

01:13:12.000 They don't know any better.

01:13:16.000 If enough congressional Democrats realize they either stand with Obamacare and lose, or they listen to the American people and have a chance at staying in office, that's the one scenario we could do it in 2015. If not, We'll do it in 2017. Okay, cut right there.

01:13:31.000 That is a guy who's barely keeping it together.

01:13:33.000 He can't wait till that interview is over so he could run out of there and throw a dress on and put some makeup on and some women's shoes and just rip his underwear apart and just take it from behind.

01:13:44.000 There's not a doubt in my mind that that guy can't wait until that interview is over for him to be himself.

01:13:51.000 He's barely holding it back like a dam. 0.93

01:13:55.000 Like a creaky wooden dam holding back the river of his gayness. 1.00

01:14:00.000 A powerful, glacial river of gayness. 0.98

01:14:05.000 He, uh... 0.95

01:14:07.000 Yeah.

01:14:08.000 Am I right?

01:14:09.000 Or am I right? 0.99

01:14:10.000 I fucking challenge anybody to argue with me that that's not an effeminate man. 0.99

01:14:15.000 A very strongly effeminate man. 0.99

01:14:17.000 Which, again, there's nothing wrong with that. 0.91

01:14:20.000 I don't know the guy, but he seemed kind of gay. 0.99

01:14:23.000 I would like a gay president. 0.99

01:14:24.000 I would love a gay president. 0.99

01:14:26.000 I think we could use it. 1.00

01:14:27.000 We could use a gay president. 1.00

01:14:29.000 We've had a black one. 1.00

01:14:30.000 I think gay before woman. 1.00

01:14:33.000 Lesbian? 0.99

01:14:35.000 Strong gay. 0.98

01:14:35.000 Strong gay man. 0.98

01:14:36.000 Strong gay man.

01:14:37.000 Lesbian one? 1.00

01:14:38.000 Sure, as long as she doesn't hate men. 0.85

01:14:39.000 As long as it's not one that had a rough experience with men. 1.00

01:14:43.000 A lot of men are dicks to women, man. 1.00

01:14:44.000 I don't want that. 1.00

01:14:45.000 I don't want anybody with prejudices. 0.99

01:14:47.000 You know, you're not responsible for all the men that have been dicks to that woman. 0.99

01:14:51.000 What lesbians do you know that you think could be a fine leader, other than Hillary Clinton? 1.00

01:14:56.000 She gay? 0.99

01:14:58.000 Or asexual? 0.94

01:15:01.000 She is married.

01:15:01.000 I don't know.

01:15:03.000 Good call.

01:15:04.000 So is Ted Cruz.

01:15:05.000 Melissa Etheridge.

01:15:06.000 That's a good call.

01:15:07.000 I say Melissa, but Melissa Etheridge thinks, and I love her to death, but she also thinks that if she's on a plane, everyone in the plane doesn't have to worry because she will not be in a plane that crashes because she creates her own reality.

01:15:21.000 But that's true.

01:15:22.000 You think that's true?

01:15:23.000 Yeah.

01:15:24.000 It's her simulation.

01:15:25.000 There's no evidence to the contrary.

01:15:27.000 It's like when we had Bert on, and Bert was talking about how he doesn't believe that you die.

01:15:31.000 He goes, prove you die.

01:15:32.000 I don't think you do die. 0.89

01:15:33.000 Prove you die.

01:15:34.000 I was like, you got a good point.

01:15:36.000 Can't really prove it, right?

01:15:37.000 I mean, you know that people have died in your life, and you know that things do die if you've ever seen a person die or seen a thing die.

01:15:45.000 Things die.

01:15:46.000 But do you die?

01:15:48.000 No, who knows?

01:15:49.000 Who knows if this is even real?

01:15:50.000 If you're listening to my voice, you have no idea if you die.

01:15:54.000 You really don't.

01:15:55.000 As far as you know, I am a figment of your imagination.

01:15:58.000 You have created this entire reality. 1.00

01:16:01.000 Everything from street lights to fucking clouds. 0.99

01:16:04.000 Everything is all a part of your absolutely spectacular and vivid imagination. 0.97

01:16:09.000 Every experience that you have, every sensory experience that you've taken in your entire life, may in fact be a part of your brain trying to make sense of your imagination.

01:16:21.000 And then there's Ted Cruz. 0.99

01:16:23.000 He's just dreaming about dicks. 1.00

01:16:29.000 I believe it. 1.00

01:16:30.000 I think we're all programmed.

01:16:31.000 I still believe it.

01:16:32.000 Well, you believe in simulation theory, right?

01:16:34.000 I believe that we are all programmed in the future.

01:16:38.000 Why is your program so weird then?

01:16:40.000 Because I'm stoned somewhere in 2,000 years from now.

01:16:45.000 But I was thinking how weird it is that we never...

01:16:49.000 No one is born and remembers anything, you know, the first couple years usually, like at least one year.

01:16:56.000 You know, like you're kind of just born and then you're slowly diluted into being, hey, I'm a live person, you know?

01:17:03.000 And there's like this whole gray area where you just kind of...

01:17:07.000 Yeah, at the beginning that you're just kind of like, I guess I... Well, there's a guy who has a theory about that, which is pretty fascinating.

01:17:13.000 I forget the gentleman's name.

01:17:15.000 But what he said was that you are not really thinking, like thinking as we know it, does not exist until you learn language.

01:17:26.000 And that until then, all you're doing is like having sensations and reactions to them, but you don't have reference.

01:17:33.000 You know when your mom is there, because your mom gives you love, you remember she gave you love, so you look forward to it, you cry to get her, and then she's in there, and you're like, the love is coming.

01:17:41.000 But you don't have an internal dialogue.

01:17:44.000 You don't know that, like, oh, here comes my mom. 1.00

01:17:46.000 Give up the tit, bitch. 1.00

01:17:47.000 Come on, I'm going to suck on some tit and get me some milk. 1.00

01:17:49.000 That's why it's funny when you have a meme with, like, a kid thinking, because you know the kids don't really think like that, or kids' words. 0.75

01:17:57.000 The idea is that once we develop a language, then we can put things into context.

01:18:03.000 And then we have words for all these things like chair, floor, door, light. 0.99

01:18:07.000 And we have this thing in our head like, man, someone shut that fucking door. 0.98

01:18:12.000 I'm tired of seeing that light come through. 0.99

01:18:14.000 And then you have that in your head. 1.00

01:18:16.000 If they would just shut that door, then the fucking light wouldn't come through. 0.99

01:18:19.000 God, I gotta get up in the morning. 0.99

01:18:21.000 And you have this internal dialogue.

01:18:22.000 And once that internal dialogue...

01:18:24.000 Comes on you know talking about anything else that you have a point of reference for or a word for then You're really thinking so what a kid is doing is like experiencing a bunch of things but not thinking about it They're not like recalling like they see it again.

01:18:40.000 They'll be scared like if the dog barked ah The dog freaked you out.

01:18:43.000 And you see the dog again.

01:18:44.000 The sound's coming. 1.00

01:18:46.000 But do you have this, oh, this fucking dog is going to start barking again. 1.00

01:18:50.000 Somebody shut him up. 1.00

01:18:51.000 That freaks me out.

01:18:52.000 They don't have that internal dialogue.

01:18:53.000 So that's why they don't remember anything.

01:18:55.000 That's why from the time where you're like a baby and you're newborn, what you really start remembering is once you hit like five, six, seven.

01:19:04.000 Once you have language and words.

01:19:05.000 Once you have words that you can recall.

01:19:07.000 Once you have things that you can bring up again.

01:19:12.000 My daughter will bring up stuff that happened to her when she was like three or four.

01:19:15.000 You know, she's like, remember that time we saw that thing?

01:19:18.000 And I'm like, yeah, that was pretty cool, right?

01:19:20.000 Like, yeah, that was cool.

01:19:21.000 Like, and she's five, and she'll talk about something that happened a year ago.

01:19:23.000 But it's because a year ago, she had language.

01:19:27.000 You know, she could talk a year ago. 0.98

01:19:28.000 But like, she doesn't bring up some shit that happened when she was one. 0.99

01:19:31.000 Yeah. 0.99

01:19:32.000 She doesn't remember it.

01:19:32.000 So late-term abortions till about two or three.

01:19:35.000 I think one.

01:19:36.000 Some kids talk.

01:19:37.000 Well, my daughter, the first daughter, was talking really good at one.

01:19:41.000 It's weird.

01:19:41.000 Like, some of them start speaking really young.

01:19:44.000 Some of them, they speak later.

01:19:46.000 It's an interesting thing.

01:19:49.000 Like, when is someone officially thinking?

01:19:52.000 I think they think that I think it's like the idea is that at 48 days after conception the soul enters the body was like the Eastern mysticism view or some some ancient view of like when when a Fetus is viable when it becomes a person That 48 days and up until then it was just a bundle of soul or a bundle of cells takes 48 days to install the operating system Well,

01:20:20.000 something's happening.

01:20:21.000 You know, you're accumulating so many different, you know, your brain is growing.

01:20:26.000 You're accumulating senses.

01:20:28.000 You're accumulating your ability to perceive.

01:20:30.000 Your eyes are growing.

01:20:32.000 They're developing.

01:20:33.000 Your sensations are growing and developing.

01:20:35.000 It's really weird, man.

01:20:37.000 I had a dream about a girl that I haven't thought about in a long time.

01:20:41.000 I wake up and all I did for the rest of the day is like, oh, what's she doing now?

01:20:46.000 I should talk to her.

01:20:47.000 And then I texted her.

01:20:48.000 And I'm thinking, how interesting is it that something that I had no control of while I was dreaming was making me do stuff when I was awake?

01:20:56.000 And I was thinking...

01:20:57.000 How interesting that, you know, the whole shutting off when you go to bed and you're dead and, you know, when you're sleeping, you just don't know what's going on.

01:21:05.000 But having that world affect your awake world.

01:21:08.000 Why don't you say world?

01:21:09.000 World.

01:21:11.000 It's an Ohio thing.

01:21:12.000 No, it's not.

01:21:13.000 No, it's not.

01:21:13.000 No, Jamie says world, too.

01:21:15.000 Anything retarded that Brian does, it's an Ohio thing. 0.99

01:21:18.000 It's my block of Ohio where the gas leak occurred.

01:21:21.000 I might, but...

01:21:22.000 Say 1,000th.

01:21:23.000 1,000th?

01:21:25.000 Everybody says 1,000th.

01:21:26.000 There's a TH on there and you have to say it that way.

01:21:28.000 1,000th.

01:21:29.000 It is weird, though, to answer your question, that when you dream, you can dream about somebody and then when you're awake, you can think about that person.

01:21:36.000 I literally woke up and was like, man, I need to find out what this girl's doing. 0.83

01:21:40.000 It was almost not...

01:21:42.000 I was like being told to do something almost.

01:21:44.000 And it was just because of interest for me, but it was something I had no control of.

01:21:48.000 I didn't want to think of this girl.

01:21:50.000 But that's just like an example of something that's happened recently.

01:21:54.000 What other things, though, that you dream about and you don't even realize you had to dream about, but during the day you're like, you know what?

01:21:59.000 I'm going to buy some new shoes.

01:22:00.000 And you're like, but you dreamt about shoes the night before.

01:22:03.000 You might not even remember, but you dreamt about red shoes.

01:22:06.000 Or you just like shoes.

01:22:07.000 It doesn't have to be connected with your dream.

01:22:09.000 That's a terrible reference.

01:22:11.000 You know what I'm saying?

01:22:12.000 I know what you're saying about the girl.

01:22:14.000 That is weird that people, they get contained in your memories.

01:22:18.000 And sometimes they get contained incorrectly.

01:22:21.000 Like, why is it about, like, exes?

01:22:23.000 Like, you, like, generally, a lot of times people, like, especially if you had a good time with that person, you only remember the good times. 0.99

01:22:29.000 And then you get with them again, like you haven't seen them in forever, and you start talking to them, and you go, oh, I forgot, you're fucking negative.

01:22:36.000 Still negative and they're still like bitching about everything and complaining and always looking at the downside of things. 0.64

01:22:43.000 That's something that for whatever reason, absence makes the heart grow fonder.

01:22:48.000 You know, we eliminate those poor memories and only want to think about the good stuff.

01:22:54.000 Except when there's police involved.

01:22:56.000 I just remember that.

01:22:57.000 Yeah, well, you have been in scenarios that have been quite a bit more extreme than myself.

01:23:02.000 You ever heard of the Mandela effect?

01:23:05.000 Mandala?

01:23:06.000 Mandela?

01:23:06.000 Like Nelson Mandela?

01:23:07.000 No, what is that?

01:23:10.000 It's Mandela, by the way.

01:23:11.000 Nelson Mandela?

01:23:12.000 Mandela.

01:23:13.000 When a large group of people have a vivid memory, that's all the same, but it's false.

01:23:20.000 Like, there's a large group of people that had a memory of Nelson Mandela dying in prison, but he obviously didn't die.

01:23:25.000 Is that like the Berenstain's Bear?

01:23:27.000 That's exactly where I was going with that.

01:23:28.000 It's come back around.

01:23:29.000 I know it's been talked about before, but it's come back around recently.

01:23:33.000 Yeah, now they're saying that we live in parallel worlds and stuff.

01:23:35.000 All it is is the Shel Silverstein.

01:23:37.000 I mean, I explained it last time.

01:23:39.000 Shel Silverstein came out the same time as Berenstain, and everyone just put the two together thinking it was the same Steen, and we just...

01:23:46.000 It's just a memory, especially for a word that's an odd word.

01:23:51.000 Berenstain is odd, but Berenstein is pretty common.

01:23:54.000 There's deep Reddit posts about it now, and a top theory is that someone's gone back in time and changed.

01:24:00.000 Exactly.

01:24:00.000 It's Shel Silverstein.

01:24:02.000 Dude, people waste so much time. 0.99

01:24:03.000 Some fucking dude was tweeting me yesterday about the flat earth. 0.99

01:24:07.000 I looked up that video. 1.00

01:24:08.000 Oh my god, this guy.

01:24:10.000 I don't normally do this, but I couldn't help it.

01:24:15.000 This guy tweets me, I was weary at first, but Eric Dubé has some compelling arguments supporting flat earth that can't be explained.

01:24:23.000 So I tweet back in all caps, NO HE DOESN'T! And then he tweets me, have you extensively looked into his research?

01:24:32.000 First of all, if you're a fucking guy that's making YouTube videos about the earth being flat, that shit isn't research. 0.99

01:24:41.000 It's just not. 1.00

01:24:42.000 You're not a scientist.

01:24:44.000 You're not wearing a lab coat.

01:24:45.000 You don't work for a major university. 1.00

01:24:47.000 Just because you're some fucking jack-off, alone in your room, obsessing about nonsense, that's not research. 1.00

01:24:53.000 That said. 1.00

01:24:54.000 So have you extensively looked into his research?

01:24:56.000 There's definitely some fuckery going on with most of the ISS footage, so which I quote, I wrote back in all caps, uh, no he doesn't.

01:25:08.000 No, it isn't. 0.79

01:25:09.000 Or no, there isn't.

01:25:10.000 No, there isn't. 0.98

01:25:10.000 No, there isn't any fuckery. 0.98

01:25:12.000 And then I just, I step back and just watch the comments. 0.53

01:25:15.000 The comments are amazing. 0.98

01:25:17.000 They're so fucking amazing.

01:25:19.000 People actually arguing for the flat earth. 0.95

01:25:22.000 People arguing against the flat earth.

01:25:23.000 You know who one of them is?

01:25:25.000 Max Eberle.

01:25:25.000 My buddy, Max Eberle.

01:25:26.000 How'd you know?

01:25:28.000 I saw it.

01:25:29.000 Did you see it or did you guess?

01:25:30.000 Yeah, I see it.

01:25:31.000 I follow him on Facebook.

01:25:33.000 I couldn't believe it.

01:25:35.000 My friend Justin texted me about it. 0.97

01:25:38.000 He goes, dude, I shit you not, Max is arguing that the Earth is flat. 0.98

01:25:42.000 I go, no! 1.00

01:25:43.000 Max is nuts. 1.00

01:25:45.000 He's so nuts. 1.00

01:25:46.000 And the Earth picture thing, too. 0.99

01:25:48.000 The Earth picture thing?

01:25:49.000 The same thing Eddie was talking about the other day, about where are all the pictures from Earth from space.

01:25:53.000 Oh, Christ.

01:25:53.000 Oh, God.

01:25:55.000 It hurts.

01:25:56.000 It hurts.

01:25:57.000 It hurts.

01:25:57.000 Do they not know that snipers actually have to take into account the curvature of the earth when they're shooting people?

01:26:04.000 Because the bullets will drop.

01:26:06.000 There's a curvature of the earth.

01:26:09.000 That's a part of the calculation when you're trying to shoot somebody.

01:26:12.000 Mm-hmm. 1.00

01:26:13.000 Fuckers. 1.00

01:26:14.000 Like, goddammit. 1.00

01:26:15.000 There's shit to think about, and then there's that. 1.00

01:26:17.000 But the horizon's flat, man. 1.00

01:26:19.000 Yeah, man. 0.99

01:26:20.000 Well, people love to fucking get worked up about nonsense. 0.99

01:26:25.000 You know, like, I posted about fucking Cecil... 0.99

01:26:31.000 I posted today about the fucking lion that killed the guy on the photographic safari thing. 0.99

01:26:37.000 So I put this on Facebook. 0.99

01:26:39.000 I go, a lion killed a safari guy in the same park where Cecil was killed.

01:26:43.000 The safari guy had a name and was loved by the locals.

01:26:46.000 The lion was not, in all caps, authorized to kill that person.

01:26:50.000 I hope the other lions do the right thing and protest. 0.99

01:26:53.000 I'm just fucking around. 1.00

01:26:55.000 And then I step back and watch the goddamn... 1.00

01:26:59.000 Fights that are going on in the comments section where people, first of all, are thinking I'm an asshole because I'm serious. 1.00

01:27:07.000 Joe, you're smarter than that. 0.99

01:27:08.000 You should know.

01:27:10.000 First of all, it reached 1.8 million people in the two hours we've been doing this podcast. 0.97

01:27:16.000 How the fuck that happened? 0.98

01:27:18.000 But, uh, Joe, you're smart. 0.99

01:27:19.000 We talked in person before. 0.90

01:27:21.000 Lions are designed to kill.

01:27:22.000 They have lion brains. 1.00

01:27:24.000 Will you shut the fuck up, stupid? 1.00

01:27:25.000 You're trying to sound smart? 1.00

01:27:28.000 You think I really think that that lion should have killed that?

01:27:31.000 I am glad.

01:27:32.000 Let me tell you this right now. 0.95

01:27:33.000 If there's a guy that's on a fucking photographic safari and the lion takes him out, I'm glad. 0.98

01:27:39.000 You know why? 0.99

01:27:40.000 Because I've been on the 405 at 4 in the afternoon.

01:27:42.000 We could use less people. 1.00

01:27:44.000 We could use less people, and anybody that's willing to go on a fucking photographic safari, you're an asshole. 1.00

01:27:50.000 If you want to go on a photographic safari in the place where lions live, you're ridiculous. 1.00

01:27:55.000 You've watched too many movies, and for the sake of mankind, you probably should get taken out so everybody else could see. 0.98

01:28:02.000 Oh, okay, they're just lions.

01:28:04.000 These aren't lions that are in a movie.

01:28:06.000 These aren't lions from a book.

01:28:07.000 These aren't lions from a cartoon.

01:28:09.000 They're giant cats. 1.00

01:28:11.000 Big fucking cats. 1.00

01:28:13.000 I got a little cat at home. 1.00

01:28:14.000 And I take little things, I crumple up a little piece of paper, and I throw them across the floor.

01:28:19.000 She chases them, dives on them, and puts them in her mouth. 1.00

01:28:22.000 And she's a fluffball. 1.00

01:28:24.000 She's a cat. 1.00

01:28:25.000 These are 600 pound cats that regularly kill shit. 1.00

01:28:30.000 All day they kill things. 1.00

01:28:31.000 They're hardwired to kill anything that's limping, anything that's weak, anything that's in front of them, including some stupid fuck with a camera. 1.00

01:28:40.000 Walking. 1.00

01:28:41.000 You should be in an Iron Man suit, and you should be armed to the dick. 0.99

01:28:44.000 If you're gonna walk around where lions are, you should be like mocking them. 0.96

01:28:50.000 You should be in one of those, not the regular Iron Man suit, but the big one where the dude's inside of it. 0.97

01:28:56.000 The big fucking gray one that they had. 0.98

01:28:58.000 The Hulk killer? 0.99

01:28:59.000 Yeah, the Hulk killer Iron Man suit.

01:29:01.000 That's what you should be in.

01:29:02.000 Did you see Fantastic Four?

01:29:04.000 Of course I didn't.

01:29:06.000 I'm not seeing anything when they have kids.

01:29:08.000 Yeah. 0.95

01:29:08.000 They redo it and now there's like a young black kid that's the flame. 0.95

01:29:11.000 Stop with your diversity. 0.97

01:29:13.000 Annie.

01:29:13.000 Okay?

01:29:13.000 I saw the fucking comic book.

01:29:15.000 You know, Blade was black. 1.00

01:29:17.000 The flame was not black.

01:29:19.000 You're making him black. 0.99

01:29:20.000 I know what you're doing.

01:29:21.000 Okay?

01:29:22.000 Stop.

01:29:23.000 It's like Annie.

01:29:25.000 Black Annie.

01:29:26.000 Black Annie.

01:29:26.000 Just make a new one, man.

01:29:28.000 I'm not against black superheroes.

01:29:30.000 Make a new one.

01:29:31.000 But when you say Superman's black, I'm like, come on.

01:29:33.000 Come on. 0.64

01:29:34.000 He's not black. 0.99

01:29:35.000 They're not doing that, are they?

01:29:36.000 They are now.

01:29:38.000 Someone was going to, yes, he should be.

01:29:40.000 Do you remember when they were saying that Santa Claus, they were doing a black Santa Claus and Megyn Kelly got really mad on Fox TV? Did you ever see that?

01:29:47.000 No.

01:29:48.000 I don't remember that.

01:29:49.000 People are so mad at her! 1.00

01:29:52.000 There was a video on Fox TV where she was saying, Santa Claus is not black.

01:29:59.000 Okay?

01:29:59.000 Let's just get it over with.

01:30:01.000 Santa Claus is not black.

01:30:02.000 No. 1.00

01:30:03.000 Santa Claus is not real, you fuck. 1.00

01:30:05.000 Okay? 1.00

01:30:05.000 That's the correct thing you should have said. 1.00

01:30:07.000 Not that he's not black. 1.00

01:30:09.000 That's hilarious. 0.87

01:30:10.000 Saint Nick.

01:30:11.000 First of all, she's right.

01:30:13.000 There's not a lot of black people in Siberia.

01:30:15.000 You know?

01:30:15.000 But you know who is black?

01:30:17.000 Jesus! 0.77

01:30:19.000 That makes more sense. 0.95

01:30:20.000 Yeah, he was black. 1.00

01:30:21.000 Fucking skin of bronze and hair of wool. 1.00

01:30:24.000 He had hair like lamb's wool. 1.00

01:30:25.000 And his skin was black.

01:30:27.000 He was Sephardic. 0.95

01:30:28.000 He was a dark person. 0.80

01:30:29.000 For sure.

01:30:30.000 Definitely didn't look like that hippie.

01:30:31.000 Let's let her play it. 1.00

01:30:33.000 Let's listen to her.

01:30:34.000 She is.

01:30:35.000 In Slate, they have a piece on.com, Santa Claus should not be a white man anymore. 0.99

01:30:40.000 And when I saw this headline, I kind of laughed, and I said, oh, this is so ridiculous. 0.98

01:30:44.000 Yet another person claiming it's racist to have a white Santa, you know? 0.98

01:30:48.000 And by the way, for all you kids watching at home, Santa just is white, but this person is just arguing that maybe we should also have a black Santa. 0.62

01:30:56.000 Listen, she's lying to your kids. 1.00

01:30:57.000 Santa is what he is, and just so you know, we're just debating this because someone wrote about it, kids.

01:31:01.000 Oh, is that hilarious? 1.00

01:31:03.000 She's got, like, fucking... 1.00

01:31:04.000 For the kids! 1.00

01:31:05.000 She's gonna say it for the kids.

01:31:07.000 Just in case any kids are listening, Santa Claus is white. 0.75

01:31:11.000 White kids, listen, Santa Claus is white. 1.00

01:31:15.000 That's ridiculous. 1.00

01:31:16.000 Show me a picture, Hooker! 1.00

01:31:17.000 How long ago was that? 1.00

01:31:18.000 Show me a picture of this fucking Santa Claus if he's white. 1.00

01:31:20.000 Two years ago. 1.00

01:31:21.000 Two years ago.

01:31:22.000 Wow.

01:31:22.000 She's hot, though.

01:31:23.000 Why does everyone want to save the kids?

01:31:24.000 Kids are kind of smart.

01:31:26.000 Or at least they think they are.

01:31:26.000 They're way smarter nowadays.

01:31:28.000 It's so important to save the kids when it comes to Santa.

01:31:31.000 Jamie, you don't know because you don't have kids, but my precious little babies need to be lied to.

01:31:36.000 They need to be lied to about Santa.

01:31:38.000 Megyn Kelly's gonna lie to them, right? 1.00

01:31:41.000 I know this kid, he gets bullied all the time.

01:31:44.000 And I actually got to see the bully bully him on the playground a couple months ago.

01:31:52.000 And I was telling him, like, you know, you should get him back.

01:31:56.000 And he goes, I am, I am.

01:31:58.000 And we made a plan where we photoshopped.

01:32:01.000 We found a photo of his bully.

01:32:03.000 And we photoshopped him kissing another kid that's another bully.

01:32:07.000 And then we printed out a bunch of them and then put them all around the playground.

01:32:11.000 I love it, dude.

01:32:13.000 That's beautiful.

01:32:14.000 Right, but it's so cool nowadays with these kids.

01:32:19.000 When I was 11, I never thought about doing crazy things like that to get back to the boy.

01:32:23.000 I just hid or something like that.

01:32:24.000 But nowadays, kids are so advanced that even when dealing with bullies, they're using technology. 0.98

01:32:31.000 They gotta be careful, though, that that kid doesn't find out who did it and beat the shit out of them. 0.97

01:32:36.000 The problem with... 0.99

01:32:38.000 Yeah, man, but fucking why is it a natural instinct for people to do that to little kids? 0.99

01:32:44.000 It's a natural instinct, right? 0.99

01:32:46.000 Like for those big kids to pick on little kids, it seems like almost like a natural instinct. 0.93

01:32:51.000 It's a fucked up instinct because like if you're bullied, like bullying for me led me into martial arts and it helped me ultimately. 0.99

01:33:01.000 Like that fear of people kicking my ass led me to go and train and do martial arts. 0.99

01:33:07.000 But, for some people, they don't do anything about it, and they have a particularly evil... 0.99

01:33:12.000 My bullying was very gentle.

01:33:15.000 Nothing bad happened.

01:33:16.000 Nobody put me in the hospital.

01:33:17.000 Nobody stole things from me or terrorized me. 0.96

01:33:21.000 I just was scared of certain kids, and certain kids fucked with me, and I avoided them. 0.91

01:33:25.000 I'd see them in the hallway, and I'd go the other way. 0.95

01:33:27.000 I'd try to find another way to get to the bus, or go way all the way around.

01:33:32.000 Look around the corner, make sure that a certain kid that I was scared of wasn't there.

01:33:36.000 But it was fairly mild as far as bullying goes.

01:33:39.000 But we all know somebody who's like beaten up by bullies. 1.00

01:33:43.000 That shit can change your life, man. 1.00

01:33:45.000 It could devastate your confidence. 1.00

01:33:47.000 It could ruin your whole year.

01:33:48.000 It could lead to depression.

01:33:49.000 It could lead to drug use. 0.98

01:33:51.000 Like and I don't know what the fuck can be done for that other than I've always suggested that Teaching kids martial arts in school would be a great way to avoid bullies because Avoid bullying because they would develop confidence and they would develop discipline and they would understand That that kind of shit is pathetic that running around and beating on kids like this kid that you're talking about and They actually not only do martial arts in school, 0.97

01:34:19.000 they actually do the opposite of doing things like kickball or games where they're actually kind of promoting bullying. 0.97

01:34:27.000 What's the one where we all had the lineup?

01:34:30.000 Dodgeball.

01:34:30.000 It's like, right, you're teaching dodgeball, which is hurting other people, but instead we could have learned karate or whatever.

01:34:37.000 Dude, I used to fucking avoid dodgeball like the plague. 0.61

01:34:40.000 Because I was in, when I was 14... 0.98

01:34:43.000 It was the only time I remember dodgeball.

01:34:45.000 But this is like before I started martial.

01:34:46.000 Well, I was kind of just starting karate. 0.99

01:34:48.000 And I was scared of everybody beating my ass. 0.99

01:34:52.000 You know, it was new in this neighborhood. 0.99

01:34:54.000 Just moved there.

01:34:55.000 It was my first year in this neighborhood as a freshman in high school. 1.00

01:34:58.000 And then there's these fucking kids that were lighting kids up with these balls, man. 1.00

01:35:03.000 Just fucking whipping these balls at kids. 1.00

01:35:06.000 And they'd get hit in the face and everybody would laugh. 1.00

01:35:09.000 And I'm like, this is crazy. 1.00

01:35:12.000 Dodgeball is fucking crazy. 0.99

01:35:13.000 And choosing partners. 1.00

01:35:15.000 Remember, you had to choose.

01:35:16.000 We all had to line up.

01:35:16.000 I want Jeff on my team.

01:35:18.000 I want Todd on my team.

01:35:19.000 And then just having to go through being picked the last.

01:35:22.000 Remember that? 0.99

01:35:23.000 There's so much fucked up shit that they do to you as a young kid that you don't realize that's teaching you. 1.00

01:35:30.000 This is your place in life. 1.00

01:35:31.000 Yeah, like your first place, your second place.

01:35:33.000 Sorry, you came in last place.

01:35:35.000 Now we're going to throw a ball at you.

01:35:37.000 You know Malcolm Gladwell, he's got a book called Outliers, about people that perform really well at things.

01:35:44.000 And one of the things that he brought up in this book was how important being successful is, being born at a certain date.

01:35:53.000 But a certain time a certain time of the year because if you're born at a certain time in the year you miss the cutoff and you're older than the other kids in your class and so like they were talking about like hockey players and that something about like it was like you know X amount of players a huge percentage of them were born later They had a rule or something,

01:36:16.000 I think, in Canada.

01:36:17.000 If you're born on January 1st or December 31st, you're playing with this group or that group.

01:36:21.000 And you could be the oldest kid, or you could be the youngest kid, actually, if you're born on the 31st.

01:36:26.000 All your friends are the day after you're in another league.

01:36:28.000 Yeah, so if you're one of those kids that's like nine months younger than the other kids that are the you know They're all 12 right, but one kid is like nine months older or ten months older.

01:36:37.000 That's fucking significant Really significant when it comes to sports and his theory is and it's it's really correct that the advantage that those kids have by being older Leads them to get better as well like one of the things about jujitsu This is a very important lesson for anybody who knows jujitsu because a lot of people don't like this aspect of jujitsu. 0.96

01:37:01.000 Some people have this meathead idea that the way to get good at jujitsu is to go against the hardest guys, get your ass kicked, and that's how you learn. 0.98

01:37:09.000 Actually, that's the wrong way to learn. 0.98

01:37:11.000 The best way to get good at jujitsu is to strangle blue belts. 0.99

01:37:14.000 You go and you find people that are just learning, but they're not as good as you, and you choke the fuck out of them. 0.98

01:37:20.000 That's how you get really good at your technique. 0.94

01:37:22.000 And people say, well, that's bullying.

01:37:23.000 Well, It is important for the blue belt to, at some point, spar with black belts. 0.92

01:37:30.000 It is important.

01:37:30.000 Or purple belts or brown belts.

01:37:33.000 Because you need to know that there's a higher level of proficiency, there's a higher level of skill, and then there's a shorter distance in between points that these guys are hitting.

01:37:43.000 They're cutting the chase, they're capitalizing on very small openings, and they...

01:37:50.000 They clamp down, and when they capitalize on these small openings, they get submissions quicker.

01:37:55.000 So you have to know that there are guys that are better.

01:37:57.000 That's important.

01:37:58.000 But to drill, the most important thing is drilling.

01:38:02.000 And when you drill, you drill with someone of your level, and you just practice on each other.

01:38:06.000 Like, you choke me, and you'll do it twice, and I'll choke you, I'll do it twice.

01:38:11.000 And it's just practice. 0.54

01:38:12.000 And maybe you resist like 50%.

01:38:15.000 Sometimes when you're doing a drill and I'll pretend to be resisting, I'll resist a little bit so that you strangle me because that simulates real life.

01:38:24.000 It simulates how it would be and you're supposed to be building your muscle memory.

01:38:28.000 But the real way to do it after you do that to get it really sharp is to practice on people with a limited amount of proficiency. 0.99

01:38:35.000 Just to choke the shit out of them. 0.97

01:38:36.000 So that's like the way that you ultimately get better is to practice on people that aren't quite as good as you. 0.99

01:38:43.000 And then you eventually develop and you get to a point where, you know, that seems kind of impractical, you know?

01:38:51.000 But, I don't remember what my point was.

01:38:56.000 Choking people, sports... 1.00

01:38:59.000 Going against different belts, kid teaching, bullying...

01:39:02.000 Oh, getting better.

01:39:04.000 So, the idea by that is, the real problem with that is, if you're in a school and, say, you're the only white belt...

01:39:12.000 And everybody else is a brown belt or a black belt and you're training with them. 1.00

01:39:16.000 Fuck, man. 1.00

01:39:17.000 You might not ever get good. 1.00

01:39:19.000 You just might get wrecked all the time.

01:39:21.000 And that's the idea with kids that are in sports that are so much younger than everyone else in their class.

01:39:27.000 Or if you're pretentious and they bring you're precocious and they bring you into class early, he skipped a grade.

01:39:33.000 So you're in seventh grade now, Billy.

01:39:35.000 Well, you got to go to seventh grade football. 1.00

01:39:37.000 Good luck, you little fuck. 1.00

01:39:39.000 He's going to get run over. 1.00

01:39:40.000 One of my best friends growing up, the whole time we were playing sports, his birthday is a week after mine, but he's a whole year older than me, and so he played sports with us the whole time. 0.97

01:39:50.000 He's smaller than me and doesn't look like he's bigger than all of us, but he would beat the shit out of every single person we would play, every sport, football, basketball, baseball, track, when we got to high school.

01:40:02.000 For some reason, he was better than everyone in that, too. 0.85

01:40:05.000 He was a ninth grader, and he was a starting freshman running back on the varsity team in the newspaper.

01:40:10.000 But he was a whole year older than everyone.

01:40:13.000 Ah, well, that's what it is.

01:40:14.000 Fifteen years ago, no one was really engaging.

01:40:15.000 Yeah, well, that's a big deal, because your body develops very rapidly.

01:40:21.000 At a young age, and so these young kids that are older than everyone else in their class, they have this significant advantage, and that advantage, according to Gladwell, it accelerates them onto success as a professional.

01:40:34.000 That because you have an advantage, you continue to get better, and you can exercise that advantage over other people, which sharpens your skills.

01:40:41.000 Just like, you know, the idea of taking, you know, getting really good because you're strangling blue belts. 1.00

01:40:47.000 It's not good for the blue belt, but it's good for you. 0.74

01:40:49.000 Because you're already ahead of them, so you're going to get better and better and better and better.

01:40:52.000 I was held back in third grade when my parents got divorced, and I was a little young, and that didn't help me at all.

01:40:59.000 But you didn't try!

01:41:01.000 You're not into sports.

01:41:03.000 You didn't even try.

01:41:04.000 What sports did you ever play?

01:41:05.000 Soccer.

01:41:05.000 Did you play soccer?

01:41:07.000 How much did you try?

01:41:08.000 On a 1 to 10?

01:41:09.000 3?

01:41:09.000 I hated it.

01:41:10.000 I don't remember.

01:41:10.000 Yeah, see?

01:41:11.000 That's the difference.

01:41:13.000 I was born in August.

01:41:14.000 I don't think that's a good month for professional sports.

01:41:18.000 Like if you wanted to go on teams.

01:41:20.000 But I didn't do it.

01:41:22.000 I mean, I only played baseball when I was little until I found martial arts.

01:41:26.000 But if I wanted to be a professional athlete, like a soccer player or a hockey player or whatever, probably not a good month.

01:41:32.000 I think the good months are like February or something like that.

01:41:35.000 February, March.

01:41:37.000 That's when the season starts, usually.

01:41:38.000 Well, you're also like late in the year, you know?

01:41:42.000 I forget what they said, what year it was, what Gladwell said, or what time of year, rather, was the best to start.

01:41:49.000 It was an interesting thing, too.

01:41:50.000 He had a thing talking about what the best year to be born was, like in the 20th century.

01:41:57.000 And it was like in the early 1930s, because it was right after the Depression was over, and like right after World War I, So, like, there was a lot of jobs to be had, the economy was booming, and then you were at the front of the line for,

01:42:13.000 like, this big baby boom that came on after that, before World War II. So you would be in positions of management, you would have these advantages.

01:42:20.000 It's really interesting when you think about, like, how lucky...

01:42:24.000 You can be or how unlucky you can be in certain situations and how that, like we're talking about bullying, can sort of flavor your whole life.

01:42:34.000 Like an unlucky roll of the dice can flavor your whole life.

01:42:38.000 And also he was talking about people that were born and that went through World War I. And he was like, well, even if you went through it, by the time you were out of the military, by the time you were trying to establish your life, you were already in your 40s.

01:42:50.000 Like, you're already, like, trying to start a career at a time where most people are already clearly established.

01:42:56.000 Really interesting when you really stop and think about, like, most of us don't engineer our lives.

01:43:01.000 You sort of just make the best with what you've got.

01:43:03.000 But there's a lot of consequences.

01:43:06.000 There's a lot of factors that play on behind the scenes that we really don't take into consideration when you consider, when you really think about, like, where you are in life.

01:43:16.000 I mean, hard work and dedication and focus, all those things are hugely important.

01:43:21.000 The ability to stick with something, the ability to put in the work, to get up, to be disciplined. 0.95

01:43:26.000 But also, there's a lot of shit that you don't have anything to do with, man, that absolutely factors in. 1.00

01:43:33.000 But then there's that bitch-ass part of people that go, well, he's only fucking... 1.00

01:43:37.000 He got there because he's lucky. 1.00

01:43:39.000 You know, he's only playing football for the fucking Dodgers. 1.00

01:43:42.000 Or for the Dodgers? 0.99

01:43:44.000 He talks about Bill Gates and his 10,000 hours of mastery and whatnot.

01:43:48.000 But a lot of what he's talking about here is that he got...

01:43:50.000 Lucky or what not because his child at home was really close to the University of Washington.

01:43:55.000 He had access to some computer programs that other people might not have had the opportunity to get a hold of.

01:44:00.000 True.

01:44:01.000 So he might not have been Bill Gates without being in the spot he was at the time he was.

01:44:05.000 True.

01:44:06.000 But he might have been something else, too.

01:44:07.000 I mean, it's also what he did.

01:44:09.000 Like, Bill Gates used to work from, like, 2 o'clock in the morning until 4 o'clock in the morning or until 6 o'clock in the morning coding.

01:44:14.000 His mother would try to wake him up, and he was always exhausted.

01:44:16.000 She couldn't figure out why.

01:44:17.000 Because the dude was up all night coding.

01:44:19.000 It's the best time to work.

01:44:20.000 Well, she would put him to bed and he would, like, pretend to sleep.

01:44:22.000 Then he'd wake up.

01:44:23.000 He'd sleep for a couple hours and then get up and code.

01:44:26.000 And I think that people that become successful, for the most part, they become successful because they figure out a way.

01:44:33.000 But would they have figured out the same way?

01:44:36.000 Would they have figured it in another way?

01:44:38.000 Or would they have been discouraged because of poor circumstances?

01:44:41.000 You know, how many people who became successful got, like, take me for example.

01:44:46.000 Not maybe with stand-up, because stand-up is like something you either just can do or you can't do.

01:44:51.000 And you have to put in the work.

01:44:53.000 I don't see any easy roads for stand-up.

01:44:55.000 If you get good at stand-up and you're headlining and killing, you put in the work.

01:44:59.000 There's just no other way around it. 0.99

01:45:01.000 But TV-wise, I got lucky as fuck. 0.89

01:45:04.000 I only auditioned for two TV shows ever, and I got both of them. 0.99

01:45:08.000 That's crazy. 0.95

01:45:09.000 Total dumb luck. 0.97

01:45:11.000 Got on MTV Half Hour Comedy Hour because of stand-up. 0.92

01:45:15.000 Then I got a development deal.

01:45:16.000 The development deal led me out to Hollywood where I... Disney gave me a bunch of money.

01:45:22.000 And I auditioned for a show. 0.93

01:45:24.000 Just got total dumb luck. 0.89

01:45:26.000 They were looking for some athletic guy to be in this baseball show. 0.97

01:45:29.000 Got that.

01:45:30.000 Then auditioned for news radio.

01:45:32.000 Got that.

01:45:33.000 Two shows.

01:45:34.000 Both of them on TV. Just total luck.

01:45:37.000 Unquestionably lucky as fuck. 0.99

01:45:38.000 And then even Fear Factor. 1.00

01:45:40.000 Lucky as fuck. 0.99

01:45:41.000 They wanted someone who had already been on TV. They wanted someone who understood competition. 1.00

01:45:44.000 And they wanted someone who was like a comedian that could work on the fly.

01:45:48.000 Luck.

01:45:49.000 Pshh.

01:45:49.000 Here I am.

01:45:50.000 Dumb luck. 0.98

01:45:51.000 So those things, I will never... 1.00

01:45:53.000 Total dumb luck. 0.99

01:45:55.000 But, also, you gotta fucking show up. 1.00

01:45:59.000 You gotta do the audition. 0.99

01:46:00.000 You gotta not choke.

01:46:02.000 Like, there's non-luck factors as well.

01:46:04.000 Like, there's certainly luck involved in everything that happens.

01:46:08.000 But there's a lot of other people that were trying out for that same show that were probably just as qualified as me, especially the first show, and they didn't get it.

01:46:15.000 Because they probably choked.

01:46:17.000 Maybe my luck was that I had gone through martial arts competitions, so I was less likely to choke. 0.99

01:46:23.000 Because I had done scarier shit, so I was used to performing under pressure. 0.97

01:46:26.000 So maybe there was luck in that. 0.99

01:46:27.000 Luck in the fact that I had this background. 0.97

01:46:29.000 But that's not necessarily luck either, because that was fucking hard to do. 0.71

01:46:34.000 So it's like this black and white thing that people want to put into, you know, when you look at, like, this guy succeeded because of hard work. 0.94

01:46:42.000 Well, maybe.

01:46:44.000 Maybe he succeeded because of hard work and what time of the year he was born and that he was older than the other kids in his class and he worked hard and he got there.

01:46:52.000 There's a lot of factors. 0.97

01:46:55.000 There's a lot of fucking factors in everybody's success. 0.97

01:46:59.000 There's a new drone prototype that Sony just released, and it can carry up to 22 pounds of cargo, and it can go up to 106 miles an hour and fly up to two hours. 0.99

01:47:16.000 How many bullets is that?

01:47:18.000 But there's a really cool video that I sent you, Jim, that it's showing it flying.

01:47:24.000 It looks like a mini airplane, unlike the drones that we know of where they're usually like circular or like a square or something like that.

01:47:33.000 This looks like a little mini jet.

01:47:36.000 But...

01:47:38.000 I thought it was interesting because it can carry up, you know, 22 pounds is a lot for something to carry.

01:47:44.000 You know what's interesting?

01:47:45.000 Like, look at the way that thing just took off.

01:47:47.000 How come they can't make planes like that?

01:47:49.000 They do.

01:47:49.000 They have planes like that.

01:47:50.000 Yeah, but I mean, for people.

01:47:52.000 Like, not just like for jets, like for fighter jets.

01:47:55.000 Like, look at the whole front end of that thing. 0.97

01:47:57.000 Why can't they fill that up with fucking passengers and have that big circle in the center be that helicopter thing that makes it just take off straight? 0.98

01:48:05.000 That's pretty dope. 0.99

01:48:06.000 There's another video below it that shows a little bit more of it flying.

01:48:14.000 But they're thinking about selling this so it could be used for, you know, like Amazon and stuff like that and pizza deliveries and things like that.

01:48:23.000 That's going to be a real problem, man.

01:48:25.000 It's going to be a real problem for amateur pilots, for sure.

01:48:28.000 I mean, if they fill the skies, if they become so many of those things, I mean, think about if these things become as common as, I mean, they probably won't, but as cell phones.

01:48:39.000 And they're just flying around all over the place.

01:48:40.000 People are sending people things.

01:48:42.000 Hey, man, can I borrow your baseball?

01:48:43.000 Sure, I'll fly it over to you.

01:48:46.000 Program it in.

01:48:47.000 You see, this is in Ohio, right?

01:48:49.000 This was a second one that just happened today.

01:48:51.000 Arrest and drone plot to supply prison contraband.

01:48:55.000 Oh, God.

01:48:56.000 This is in Maryland, I believe.

01:48:58.000 Yeah.

01:48:59.000 Ohio just had one also where people are smuggling in drugs into courtyards and stuff like that. 0.61

01:49:04.000 Well, do you know why?

01:49:04.000 They got caught because the wrong people got the drugs and there was a fight.

01:49:12.000 Wow.

01:49:13.000 Look, guns.

01:49:14.000 Guns in prison?

01:49:15.000 That's hilarious.

01:49:16.000 They're smuggling in guns.

01:49:17.000 What are those things?

01:49:17.000 Pokemon cards?

01:49:19.000 Well, what are they going to do when people start smuggling in 3D printers and they can just build whatever the fuck they want in jail?

01:49:25.000 Is that Pokemon? 0.84

01:49:25.000 It might be tobacco. 0.84

01:49:27.000 That was the most of what they had on that other one.

01:49:28.000 Those little things are tobacco? 0.98

01:49:30.000 Could be packets.

01:49:31.000 That's what this is on top.

01:49:32.000 Who cares what it is?

01:49:33.000 Just the idea that they can just fly it in and drop it off.

01:49:36.000 Did you hear about the Pokemon convention?

01:49:38.000 Was it yesterday?

01:49:39.000 Oh, I get the newsletter.

01:49:40.000 I'm part of the fan club.

01:49:41.000 Of course.

01:49:42.000 No, there was two gunmen that came into a Pokemon convention.

01:49:45.000 Enough! 1.00

01:49:46.000 Armed with 250 rounds or something like that.

01:49:48.000 Everybody over 18 dies! 1.00

01:49:51.000 Yeah.

01:49:52.000 Look at this.

01:49:52.000 Pokemon attack.

01:49:53.000 I mean, who attacks Pokemon people?

01:49:55.000 They're like the most adorable, nicest people in the world.

01:49:58.000 But look at that.

01:49:59.000 You said...

01:49:59.000 Do you not like the word world?

01:50:03.000 I don't like world.

01:50:04.000 Is that how you say it?

01:50:05.000 World.

01:50:06.000 How do you say it?

01:50:07.000 W-O-R-L-D. Why do you put the R before the O? It rolls off the tongue easier than going world. 0.96

01:50:14.000 World?

01:50:15.000 World.

01:50:17.000 How do you say it?

01:50:18.000 World.

01:50:19.000 No, no, you don't say it like that.

01:50:21.000 How do you say it?

01:50:21.000 The world.

01:50:22.000 How do you say it?

01:50:23.000 World.

01:50:23.000 No, that's the right way.

01:50:25.000 That's why I say it.

01:50:25.000 No, you say world.

01:50:27.000 How does he say it, Jamie?

01:50:29.000 You say W-R-O-L-D. You're confused now.

01:50:32.000 I can't even hear it.

01:50:34.000 It's the best thing in the world.

01:50:37.000 World.

01:50:38.000 World.

01:50:39.000 Okay, keep saying it like that.

01:50:40.000 We're good.

01:50:41.000 No, that's what I say!

01:50:42.000 No, you don't.

01:50:43.000 You say world.

01:50:44.000 Like world.

01:50:45.000 World.

01:50:46.000 No, it doesn't even say world.

01:50:48.000 World.

01:50:48.000 This is world.

01:50:51.000 W-R-O-L-D. That's what you say. 0.96

01:50:53.000 World.

01:50:54.000 World.

01:50:54.000 The best thing in the world.

01:50:56.000 World.

01:50:57.000 Well, it doesn't matter.

01:50:58.000 Alright, we gotta get out of here because it's about, we're at two hours in, and I got a boogie.

01:51:03.000 Do we cover everything that's important in the world of the internet?

01:51:06.000 Pretty much. 0.91

01:51:07.000 If you see these things and you, you know, is anything fucked up, just tweet it at us. 0.96

01:51:13.000 We're trying to do these if we can, if we have the time, once a week, but it's tough. 0.91

01:51:19.000 Thank you, Brian.

01:51:20.000 Thank you.

01:51:20.000 Always a good time.

01:51:21.000 Yeah, plug. 0.92

01:51:21.000 Dates, what do you got? 0.92

01:51:22.000 Tomorrow we got a secret show with Russell Peters, Tiffany Haddish, Tony Hinchcliffe, Dean Del Rey, some secrets, and then Friday.

01:51:29.000 Will Tiffany Haddish be queefing into the microphone?

01:51:32.000 No, but Tiffany Haddish's show... 1.00

01:51:34.000 She's done queefing? 0.94

01:51:35.000 Yeah, she doesn't do that anymore. 1.00

01:51:36.000 Why?

01:51:36.000 Because she's on television now?

01:51:37.000 She's on NBC now.

01:51:38.000 And you can see her show Wednesday also.

01:51:40.000 Gerard Carmichael show.

01:51:41.000 Yep.

01:51:41.000 And also, I have a show in Ventura, California, Friday at the Hong Kong Inn, doing a full set there.

01:51:48.000 Yeehaw.

01:51:49.000 Sweet.

01:51:49.000 All right.

01:51:50.000 Deathsquad.tv for more details.

01:51:52.000 Redband on Twitter. 1.00

01:51:54.000 And that's it, you fucking savages. 1.00

01:51:57.000 See you soon. 1.00

01:51:57.000 Bye-bye. 1.00

01:51:58.000 Big kiss.

01:52:11.000 you

The Joe Rogan Experience - August 25, 2015

Joe Rogan Experience #688 - Brian Redban

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Summary

Transcript