The Joe Rogan Experience - Joe Rogan Experience #691 - Bryan Callen

00:00:00.000 Oh, fuck yeah, ladies and gentlemen. 1.00

00:00:02.000 Oh, fuck yeah. 0.99

00:00:03.000 So we're doing this place on the 22nd and the 23rd. 0.99

00:00:07.000 We're working together two nights in a row, Brian Callan.

00:00:09.000 Yes.

00:00:09.000 That's what's happening.

00:00:10.000 Yes.

00:00:11.000 Ladies and gentlemen, can you believe this? 0.98

00:00:12.000 I get to work with one of my best friends on the planet Earth, Brian motherfucking Callan. 0.97

00:00:17.000 Brian the Kid. 0.83

00:00:18.000 September 22nd and 23rd.

00:00:20.000 Yeah, 22nd will be at the Ice House.

00:00:23.000 I hate saying one of my best friends, because...

00:00:27.000 But you're my favorite.

00:00:29.000 I'm kind of your favorite.

00:00:30.000 Shh! 0.97

00:00:31.000 Guys, at the end of the day... 0.99

00:00:33.000 What the fuck, Joe Rogan? 0.99

00:00:34.000 At the end of the day... 1.00

00:00:34.000 Where am I? Where do I fit in your fucking program? 1.00

00:00:37.000 My number three cocksucker? 1.00

00:00:39.000 I'm very easy to hang out with for you. 0.99

00:00:41.000 It's just, it's no work. 0.99

00:00:41.000 Well, we're both retarded. 0.99

00:00:42.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:00:43.000 We speak each other's language.

00:00:45.000 That's the best part of it.

00:00:46.000 Yeah.

00:00:46.000 We understand.

00:00:47.000 The 23rd, you guys, Hong Kong Inn.

00:00:50.000 Yeah, we're doing the Ventura, in Ventura, California.

00:00:52.000 Yeah, we're doing two shows now.

00:00:53.000 We just added an 8 o'clock.

00:00:54.000 Well, we haven't added an 8 o'clock.

00:00:56.000 It's not for sale yet, but it will be for sale soon.

00:00:58.000 Yeah, it's going to be an 8 o'clock and a 10 o'clock show.

00:01:00.000 Yeah, and Tuesday, we're doing something that's like a showcase at the Ice House.

00:01:06.000 Just me and Callan on Tuesday night, the 22nd.

00:01:09.000 22nd on the 23rd.

00:01:10.000 The 22nd Ice House, 23rd, Hong Kong Inn.

00:01:12.000 Oh, my God.

00:01:12.000 Two shows, 8 and 10. Ugh.

00:01:14.000 If we just had a hunting trip in with that, it might be the perfect week.

00:01:18.000 We need to go hunting again.

00:01:21.000 It's not even about the animals. 0.98

00:01:23.000 It's just an opportunity for me to be a silly goose and have you captive. 0.96

00:01:29.000 Well, one of our favorite trips was the one in Alaska, which was the most miserable. 0.99

00:01:33.000 But Ronella had a really fucking good point about that trip. 1.00

00:01:36.000 And he was talking about things that are fun. 0.93

00:01:38.000 He's like, there's things that are fun while you're doing them, and then they're not fun afterwards.

00:01:43.000 But there's things that are not fun while you're doing them, and they become really fun after you've done them.

00:01:48.000 Such an interesting point.

00:01:50.000 Yeah, it's one of his buddies has this scale of fun.

00:01:53.000 Yeah.

00:01:54.000 It's like, and the cheapest, easiest fun is like rollercoaster rides. 0.98

00:01:58.000 But nobody looks back on a rollercoaster ride and goes, man, that time I went down a fucking rollercoaster ride. 0.97

00:02:03.000 Yeah, we did that rollercoaster. 0.99

00:02:05.000 Dude, we went up, we went down with all those other people strapped to our seat.

00:02:08.000 No, no, no.

00:02:08.000 You need an element of suffering.

00:02:10.000 You need to be shivering in the morning and wet.

00:02:13.000 And I think, because they've done some studies on what happens when you're in those situations.

00:02:19.000 You create, anxiety actually creates oxytocin.

00:02:42.000 Well, with you and I. But you and I have a good attitude for that stuff.

00:02:46.000 We can both just accept the fact that we're in a bad environment.

00:02:50.000 There's some people that just can't accept it and they freak out.

00:02:52.000 Yeah.

00:02:53.000 Those are the ones you can't bring with you.

00:02:54.000 I can't bring those people with me.

00:02:56.000 Yeah.

00:02:57.000 But even those people, I always submit that a lot of that is like how you've always approached bad situations.

00:03:03.000 Like, how have you learned?

00:03:05.000 Well, I would say it's also a fact that they...

00:03:17.000 We're good to go.

00:03:39.000 And some dude just got up and went down the road and said, I quit.

00:03:43.000 I give up.

00:03:44.000 I'm done. 0.99

00:03:45.000 And Tim is sitting there freezing and he goes, that dude is so fucking smart. 0.99

00:03:51.000 He's so much smarter than I am. 1.00

00:03:53.000 Here I am in this shit and that guy is smart enough to be like, fuck it. 1.00

00:03:57.000 I don't want to do this anymore. 1.00

00:03:59.000 And he just says, I was just too stubborn to quit.

00:04:02.000 Now, I'm more impressed with Tim.

00:04:04.000 Then I am with that guy.

00:04:06.000 Depends on what the guy did.

00:04:07.000 If he left and started some global powerhouse of a company like Tesla Motors or something like that, and went on to make a billion dollars in the next two years, I would say, yeah, that guy probably did the right thing.

00:04:18.000 That's why it's really important for a society to be structured in such a way that you allow people to do what they're meant to do.

00:04:25.000 If you're in Russia, the guy with the biggest guns and the biggest muscles, that's the guy that runs everything.

00:04:30.000 But how much innovation comes out of Russia?

00:04:31.000 When was the last time you bought a Russian computer, a Russian car, or a Russian anything?

00:04:35.000 That's a very good point.

00:04:36.000 Yeah, because...

00:04:36.000 They make good fighters.

00:04:37.000 They make good fighters, and they're very tough.

00:04:39.000 They make good hoes. 1.00

00:04:40.000 Very macho culture.

00:04:42.000 How about the hoes? 1.00

00:04:42.000 Women like aggressive men. 1.00

00:04:43.000 The hoes are fantastic. 1.00

00:04:44.000 They're on point.

00:04:45.000 They are on point.

00:04:46.000 And I was 17, and I had my experience with two of them in the Cosmos Hotel.

00:04:50.000 Really?

00:04:51.000 In Russia?

00:04:51.000 I sure did.

00:04:52.000 17. Svetlana and Cristina.

00:04:54.000 Where'd you get the money?

00:04:55.000 Oh, I didn't give them money, but I did give them my Nike shoes and my blue jeans, and my blue jeans, because there was a guy there.

00:05:02.000 So this is before we sorted out the Cold War?

00:05:05.000 1985. So it was still danger.

00:05:07.000 Uh-huh.

00:05:08.000 I was 18, 17. You barely could get over there, right?

00:05:11.000 I mean, you could get over there when they looked at you funny.

00:05:12.000 You had a government monitor?

00:05:15.000 You had a government monitor.

00:05:16.000 They would bug your hotel room to make sure you weren't, you know, CIA or whatever. 1.00

00:05:22.000 So did you walk around your hotel room going, oh, fuck, yeah! 1.00

00:05:25.000 I'm coming, coming! 1.00

00:05:26.000 I'm coming again!

00:05:28.000 Communism, communist era turns me on!

00:05:31.000 We follow him.

00:05:32.000 Look at transcript all the time.

00:05:34.000 Come. 1.00

00:05:34.000 Look, American dick. 1.00

00:05:35.000 Look, he's come here. 1.00

00:05:36.000 He's come there.

00:05:37.000 He come bathroom. 0.50

00:05:38.000 He come balcony.

00:05:39.000 He come television.

00:05:41.000 On bed.

00:05:42.000 Who clean?

00:05:43.000 Not me.

00:05:43.000 He's young.

00:05:44.000 He's 17. His dick never go down. 1.00

00:05:46.000 Always. 1.00

00:05:47.000 You know what Mike Swick told me?

00:05:49.000 Mike Swick used to work for some government agency.

00:05:52.000 I forget what it was.

00:05:53.000 I want to say Secret Service.

00:05:55.000 But they were in Moscow, and they discovered these listening devices that the Russians had placed in their buildings.

00:06:01.000 And they were so sophisticated that they were powered by the movement of the building.

00:06:07.000 Because every building has subtle movement.

00:06:10.000 Like, if you've ever been in a building that is in an earthquake, it's a very weird feeling, because you feel the building, like, rocking back and forth, and it's disconcerting, you know? 0.97

00:06:19.000 It's like, whoa, this thing fucking moves, man.

00:06:22.000 But there's a constant moving and swaying with the wind, and it's very minute. 0.99

00:06:28.000 And sometimes you can feel it, like it's a heavy storm, but most of the time you can't.

00:06:32.000 Well, the Russians had figured out... 0.93

00:06:34.000 How to make some piece of sound equipment power by that.

00:06:39.000 So it had no external power source.

00:06:41.000 It was completely powered by the movement of the building.

00:06:44.000 And so the device would turn on?

00:06:46.000 Mm-hmm.

00:06:46.000 Wow.

00:06:47.000 So if somebody was walking, it would turn on.

00:06:49.000 Well, I don't know the specifics, but I know that it was a very sophisticated device that was powered by the movement of the building.

00:06:56.000 I think a lot of those are voice-activated.

00:06:58.000 I used to have a voice-activated tape recorder.

00:07:01.000 At one point, I was trying to hook it up to the tank, my isolation tank, so that when I'm in the tank and I have a great idea, I could just say it and record it, but I never, I just didn't use it.

00:07:10.000 Because the ideas were just coming at you.

00:07:13.000 Like, when you're in the tank, the ideas are just coming at you like wet fish.

00:07:16.000 Yeah, I know.

00:07:17.000 Try to catch them, try to hold on to one, but they're really hard to do.

00:07:20.000 In that tank, I try to have no thoughts.

00:07:22.000 That's hard to do.

00:07:24.000 But this guy, Swick, when Swick was telling me these guys, whoever had set this equipment up in there, they were using sophisticated equipment that the U.S. government didn't even know existed.

00:07:40.000 Wow.

00:07:40.000 Yeah.

00:07:41.000 It's always been a technological race.

00:07:43.000 We were far ahead of them in the Cold War.

00:07:46.000 Sort of, but not with rocketry.

00:07:50.000 Not with the space program.

00:07:53.000 You're always going to have problems whenever there's a country where people don't have the motivation to succeed and achieve because they don't get financially rewarded or they're constrained by that sort of...

00:08:06.000 They have this sort of imperialistic...

00:08:10.000 Russian sort of economy.

00:08:11.000 It's a very different way of achieving success.

00:08:15.000 You achieve success if you get in with the right group of people and you have to play the right politics.

00:08:20.000 Yeah, it's an economy of influence. 0.99

00:08:21.000 You can't just be some fucking nomad, some rogue investor who goes out and kicks ass and makes a lot of money. 0.99

00:08:28.000 They take those guys and they take their money and they lock them up in jail. 1.00

00:08:32.000 That's right.

00:08:32.000 I mean, Putin has done that to many of these oligarch billionaire characters in these things.

00:08:37.000 The mistake that a lot of those guys made was going into politics and criticizing the government.

00:08:42.000 Yes.

00:08:42.000 Putin had sort of an unwritten law that said, you can make your money.

00:08:44.000 You're going to pay us a little something.

00:08:46.000 You can make your money.

00:08:47.000 You start making noise about politics.

00:08:50.000 And that's what they did to, what's his name?

00:08:52.000 The guy who owned Yukos Oil, I think it's called.

00:08:54.000 The biggest oil magnet.

00:08:55.000 And they stormed his plane.

00:08:57.000 And I think he's still in jail.

00:08:59.000 No, they let him out.

00:09:00.000 They let him out.

00:09:01.000 But I think it's the same guy you're talking about.

00:09:04.000 It was a very famous case.

00:09:06.000 It took everything.

00:09:08.000 When you have a government like that, when you don't have property rights, when you don't have due process, when you don't have objective law, what happens is, who in the world is going to work really hard to create a company when the guy with the biggest guns can come along and take it?

00:09:22.000 Again, I'd love to sit Putin down and ask him how he thinks that strategy makes any sense.

00:09:29.000 He's not thinking that it makes sense.

00:09:31.000 He's thinking that he can do it.

00:09:33.000 Yeah, it's a very short-sighted thing that ironically makes your country way weaker.

00:09:38.000 It lowers your life expectancy and everything.

00:09:43.000 Russia is a one-crop economy. 0.83

00:09:45.000 Oil.

00:09:46.000 And now that oil is at $40 a barrel when it was at $100, they're having a major crisis. 0.99

00:09:52.000 Do you think that is a part of the US strategy to fuck with them? 0.98

00:09:55.000 Absolutely not. 0.99

00:09:56.000 No.

00:09:56.000 Absolutely not.

00:09:57.000 So you don't think the US government has any control whatsoever on the amount of the price of oil?

00:10:03.000 Absolutely not.

00:10:04.000 Is it possible?

00:10:05.000 Russia's biggest problem is that their history has either given rise to czars, kings, or a different kind of czar, which is the communist dictator.

00:10:14.000 You know, the Russians are... 1.00

00:10:16.000 A very industrious people and, you know, you wonder what they would be capable of doing if they lived in a society where the incentive structure rewarded you for your work and your ingenuity.

00:10:27.000 Unfortunately, they have always lived under some kind of an autocracy, some kind of oligarchy.

00:10:35.000 It's never been different.

00:10:36.000 I mean, Putin is essentially a czar, and he has his small group of people around him.

00:10:42.000 So I believe that it has nothing to do with the United States.

00:10:46.000 In fact, it has everything to do with the philosophy.

00:10:49.000 That's not what I meant, though, honestly.

00:10:51.000 I agree with you on all that.

00:10:52.000 But what I meant is the price of oil. 0.97

00:10:54.000 Do you think it's manipulated to fuck with events? 0.95

00:10:56.000 I don't think it's possible. 0.62

00:10:57.000 Oil is a worldwide commodity.

00:11:00.000 And so when it's traded on the worldwide commodity, nobody's controlling oil.

00:11:05.000 Oil is out there and traded.

00:11:07.000 Do you know how it goes up and down?

00:11:10.000 Like when oil goes from $40 a barrel, $100 a barrel, how does it do that?

00:11:14.000 I don't know the intricacies of that, but I do know that one of the reasons it went from $100 to $40 a barrel was fracking in this country where we had our own access to massive oil shales.

00:11:25.000 Yeah, that's a big deal.

00:11:26.000 It's incredible.

00:11:27.000 It's changed everything.

00:11:28.000 And all of a sudden, we're no longer dependent on Russian oil.

00:11:33.000 Other people aren't as dependent on Russian oil.

00:11:34.000 They can buy our oil for cheaper.

00:11:36.000 Or there's just a glut.

00:11:37.000 There's just more oil.

00:11:38.000 And when there's more oil being traded on the world stage, the price will come down.

00:11:42.000 There is not a scarcity of oil.

00:11:44.000 I mean, in fact, oil now in 2015, I think, is now – I mean, the price of gas is ridiculously cheap.

00:11:52.000 Because nobody expected this kind of technology to create that much oil that quickly.

00:11:57.000 You know, fracking, though, seems like, no matter what anybody says, I mean, there's going to be debate.

00:12:04.000 Anytime there's anything controversial, anytime that there's any sort of environmental risk with something like that, it's hard to separate the facts from the noise.

00:12:14.000 Yes.

00:12:15.000 But it seems, without a doubt, that some areas are getting contaminated. 0.96

00:12:19.000 It seems without a doubt that some rivers are getting polluted, some well systems are getting fucked up.

00:12:24.000 That movie Gasland got criticized for some inaccuracies, but they couldn't criticize all of it. 0.59

00:12:31.000 You know, there's some undeniable aspects to fracking.

00:12:34.000 There's some undeniable aspects to any kind of energy technology, because the fact of the matter is civilization and feeding the civilization and energy source is going to be at this point polluting.

00:12:46.000 And I think the way out of it is, you know, a lot of people favor legislation, and I think they might be a place for legislation, of course.

00:12:53.000 But I think what's really going to get us out of that kind of an issue is technology, is just create more incentives.

00:13:01.000 I don't care if it's through the government or, you know, government grants or private enterprise, create incentives for smart people to come up with clean technology.

00:13:09.000 And that's what we're doing.

00:13:11.000 You know, that's kind of where you want to head. 0.93

00:13:14.000 Yeah, it's not like there's going to be some sort of an instant solution for the pollution of the atmosphere or the ocean, but it seems like with people, people are really fucking smart.

00:13:22.000 There's these giant leaps that they make every now and then, and a lot of them are due to pressure.

00:13:26.000 There's some real pressure where people are worried about the environment.

00:13:30.000 100%.

00:13:30.000 And there's going to be people way smarter than us that are going to figure some ways around it.

00:13:34.000 Like, did you hear about that 19-year-old kid came up with a device to clean all the plastic out of the ocean?

00:13:40.000 No.

00:13:40.000 Yeah, he won some prize for it.

00:13:42.000 Jamie, see if you can find that. 0.98

00:13:43.000 It's like some gigantic fucking skimmer that's going to go over the Pacific garbage patch, and it sucks the plastic out, and I think it puts it to use. 0.97

00:13:52.000 See, the thing about plastic is, if you could actually get it out of the ocean, it's valuable. 0.99

00:13:57.000 It has a value.

00:13:58.000 Well, there's more...

00:13:59.000 What is that?

00:14:00.000 They did something...

00:14:01.000 There's an island of plastic the size of the continental United States or something crazy.

00:14:04.000 It's not quite that big, but it's like...

00:14:05.000 It's not necessarily an island either.

00:14:08.000 Like, I've described it as an island, and people have corrected me.

00:14:10.000 What it is is like soup.

00:14:12.000 Yes.

00:14:12.000 It's like there's...

00:14:13.000 Where the wind...

00:14:14.000 Tiny pieces.

00:14:15.000 Yeah.

00:14:15.000 They're very small.

00:14:16.000 They're very small.

00:14:17.000 And that's where the tide has...

00:14:18.000 You know, there's areas where there's like the currents.

00:14:22.000 They put things into like a circulation.

00:14:24.000 Yeah.

00:14:25.000 And then it'll all accumulate in this one area.

00:14:27.000 But it's like...

00:14:27.000 I think that any problem has a solution.

00:14:30.000 I actually really, as I get older, I'm way less cynical.

00:14:33.000 Here it is right here, Ocean Cleanup.

00:14:36.000 So this guy's figured out some way, and correct me if I'm wrong, Jamie, is this the same one where there's a 19-year-old kid who created this?

00:14:47.000 I didn't see anything about his age.

00:14:48.000 This might be a different thing because I never saw this part before.

00:14:52.000 I re-googled the story from like 2013 when it was going around.

00:14:56.000 I just researched the new name to find some updated stories on it.

00:15:00.000 Oh, so this is the update?

00:15:01.000 Yeah, this is their actual website.

00:15:03.000 The largest cleanup in history.

00:15:04.000 So they're gonna...

00:15:06.000 Create some gigantic, huge machine.

00:15:09.000 It's probably gonna create a lot of jobs. 0.99

00:15:12.000 And they're gonna suck all that fucking plastic out of the ocean. 1.00

00:15:15.000 The real problem, too, is not just the plastic in the ocean, but overfishing. 1.00

00:15:20.000 We kill a lot of fucking fish. 0.99

00:15:23.000 I wonder, though, if there's a way. 1.00

00:15:25.000 I mean, they have hatcheries. 0.87

00:15:26.000 I wonder if there's a way for us to create hatcheries that release fish into the wild.

00:15:32.000 Because we have hatcheries that release salmon.

00:15:34.000 We do it with salmon, and we do it with trout.

00:15:37.000 There's places where you fish for trout, and the fish all come from hatcheries, and they stock the fish.

00:15:43.000 They stock the fish.

00:15:43.000 Well, the problem with it is the dead zones, the ecological dead zones in the bottom of the ocean, the trawlers, where they drag for shellfish and stuff.

00:15:51.000 They drag these giant sort of claws that collect everything the size of semis. 1.00

00:15:56.000 And they just do that.

00:15:58.000 And there are areas in the Atlantic that are massive dead zones.

00:16:01.000 There's some crazy amount, like areas the size of Western Europe that are literally dead zones. 0.99

00:16:06.000 Yeah, there's no fucking plants growing down there. 0.99

00:16:09.000 There's no oxygen. 0.99

00:16:10.000 Yeah, coral gets devastated.

00:16:12.000 But I had linguine with clams last night.

00:16:15.000 It was delicious. 0.99

00:16:16.000 I'm not going to go pick those fucking clams. 0.99

00:16:17.000 Who's going to get me clams? 1.00

00:16:19.000 We'll figure it out.

00:16:21.000 Look at this.

00:16:22.000 Same guy.

00:16:23.000 What a cool name.

00:16:23.000 Boy on Slat.

00:16:24.000 Yeah, he sounds like a wizard.

00:16:26.000 He's a Dutch entrepreneur.

00:16:28.000 Dutch.

00:16:28.000 High.

00:16:29.000 High as fuck. 1.00

00:16:30.000 Guaranteed. 1.00

00:16:31.000 Entrepreneur and inventor.

00:16:32.000 This kid, this is a guy to get on the podcast now before he becomes too big.

00:16:37.000 Wow.

00:16:37.000 You need to find him.

00:16:38.000 Find him, Jamie.

00:16:39.000 Make a note.

00:16:40.000 Make a mental note.

00:16:41.000 Call Matt Staggs.

00:16:42.000 Find this young man.

00:16:43.000 We'll fly him out from Holland.

00:16:45.000 Tell him we have weed.

00:16:46.000 Let him know.

00:16:47.000 He's only 19. We could corrupt him.

00:16:49.000 Take him around Brian Redband's girls.

00:16:51.000 Yeah.

00:16:51.000 Exactly.

00:16:52.000 That's kryptonite for any genius.

00:16:54.000 Bring him to dirty places.

00:16:55.000 Yeah, we had Alex Honnold on, who's one of the best free climbers in the world. 0.98

00:17:00.000 Oh, yeah, that kid's a freak.

00:17:01.000 Yeah.

00:17:01.000 He is the best, isn't he?

00:17:02.000 I mean, he does it without ropes.

00:17:03.000 Yeah, he does.

00:17:04.000 He does it with ropes first to map out his course.

00:17:07.000 Obviously, you have to make sure that you can do it without ropes.

00:17:10.000 So you've got to do it with ropes first, but then he just makes a decision and knows what he can do and what he can't do.

00:17:15.000 Anyway, he was like...

00:17:17.000 Like, real mellow and, like, steady. 0.85

00:17:21.000 Until Brian brought up girls and porn stars.

00:17:24.000 He's like, what?

00:17:25.000 Really?

00:17:26.000 Because we're inviting him to go to Vegas.

00:17:30.000 There was a UFC in Vegas, and we were doing a show out there.

00:17:33.000 And the guy's eyes lit up.

00:17:36.000 It's funny. 1.00

00:17:37.000 It's just like, you're not getting any pussy on that mountain. 1.00

00:17:39.000 Dude, pussy is, like, the most... 1.00

00:17:41.000 Busy's kryptonite for anybody. 1.00

00:17:43.000 It is for a lot of these guys.

00:17:44.000 There are women that can change your whole life. 1.00

00:17:46.000 What's that man's name again, that young fellow?

00:17:50.000 Boyenslat.

00:17:51.000 Boyenslat.

00:17:52.000 Boyenslat. 0.97

00:17:52.000 I guarantee you there's some girls out there that are reading the same thing, especially the dirty girls that listen to this podcast. 0.97

00:17:58.000 They're going to find him. 0.88

00:17:59.000 They want the young genius, the young Dutch genius. 1.00

00:18:02.000 They're going to suck money out of his dick. 1.00

00:18:03.000 He's probably super tall, girl. 1.00

00:18:05.000 Super tall and thin.

00:18:06.000 Doesn't matter if he is.

00:18:08.000 The Dutch are the tallest men in Europe.

00:18:09.000 He could buy you a Bentley. 1.00

00:18:10.000 Just suck it out of his dick. 1.00

00:18:12.000 You could literally suck a Bentley out of his dick. 1.00

00:18:15.000 You just have to suck hard enough and just gently work the balls. 1.00

00:18:18.000 He just starts reaching into his pocket. 1.00

00:18:20.000 Yes, just be magical to him.

00:18:22.000 Be a magical nymph who came out of nowhere and just came out of the woods.

00:18:25.000 And get a trap phone. 0.99

00:18:27.000 All those guys that are sending you dick pictures, don't give that number to... 0.99

00:18:31.000 What's his name again? 0.99

00:18:32.000 Boyan?

00:18:33.000 Don't give it to Blatt.

00:18:34.000 It's kind of funny that he's something that involves water and he's kind of buoyant.

00:18:39.000 Yeah.

00:18:39.000 You know?

00:18:40.000 Boyan.

00:18:42.000 Yeah, that's all we need, man.

00:18:43.000 Just one girl. 1.00

00:18:44.000 One girl with a fucking iPhone with no contacts on it. 1.00

00:18:48.000 She's only getting messages from Boyan. 1.00

00:18:50.000 And then extort them for money.

00:18:51.000 Let's leave that phone laying around.

00:18:53.000 Never has to worry about getting in trouble. 1.00

00:18:56.000 Because it's just dicks. 0.99

00:18:58.000 Vibrating dicks. 0.99

00:19:00.000 Get some Russian gal. 1.00

00:19:01.000 Some Russian gal that maybe you met when you were 17 and stole your sneakers. 0.88

00:19:04.000 Get her. 0.58

00:19:05.000 Get her to find Boyan. 1.00

00:19:06.000 I bet Putin would fucking send his attackers. 1.00

00:19:10.000 He's probably got little trained piranha women. 1.00

00:19:13.000 He's trained over there.

00:19:14.000 I guarantee he does.

00:19:14.000 But they all bang.

00:19:15.000 Everybody in the fucking cabinet or whatever they have. 1.00

00:19:17.000 Parliament. 1.00

00:19:17.000 Kingdom. 1.00

00:19:17.000 There's a lot of fucking that goes on in the parliament. 1.00

00:19:19.000 Of course! 1.00

00:19:20.000 A lot of anonymous fucking with masks. 1.00

00:19:21.000 Well, that's one of the reasons why Star Wars is so ridiculous, okay? 1.00

00:19:24.000 Because Darth Vader had no motivation. 1.00

00:19:26.000 Darth Vader wasn't getting any pussy, okay? 1.00

00:19:29.000 He was just being evil. 1.00

00:19:30.000 Yeah.

00:19:30.000 There was no money.

00:19:32.000 He wasn't like rolling around in money.

00:19:33.000 Well, domination of the universe, right?

00:19:36.000 For what?

00:19:37.000 To wear that stupid mask? 1.00

00:19:38.000 Come on, what are you going to do? 1.00

00:19:40.000 You can't even exist without that stupid helmet on, and you're going to dominate the universe, and then what? 1.00

00:19:44.000 You win? 1.00

00:19:45.000 You're already winning.

00:19:45.000 And when you were around, you could choke them without even using your hands.

00:19:49.000 You could fake choke them from a distance and kill them. 1.00

00:19:51.000 What do you want? 1.00

00:19:52.000 You want more than that?

00:19:52.000 But you wonder about people like Genghis Khan and what motivated him.

00:19:55.000 Pussy. 1.00

00:19:56.000 Pussy and booty? 1.00

00:19:57.000 Pussy. 1.00

00:19:57.000 Do you know how much pussy that guy had? 1.00

00:19:59.000 Do you know what the numbers are? 1.00

00:19:59.000 One in 500 male Chinese men are directly related to... 1.00

00:20:05.000 Directly. 1.00

00:20:06.000 He changed the fucking ecosystem. 1.00

00:20:08.000 It's crazy. 1.00

00:20:09.000 Dude, there was a New York Times article that said that he killed so many people, something around 10% of the world's population died while he was alive directly because of his decisions.

00:20:21.000 Yeah.

00:20:22.000 It was so different. 1.00

00:20:23.000 The biggest asshole on the planet. 1.00

00:20:25.000 Or a great guy who was misunderstood, who was killing a lot of assholes. 1.00

00:20:29.000 I bet everybody back then was an asshole. 1.00

00:20:31.000 Dealing with 1200 AD. Fucking kill them all. 1.00

00:20:34.000 What do they know? 1.00

00:20:35.000 They're all apes.

00:20:36.000 Well, what Dan Carlin says, you have to wonder what the strength of his nature was to wake up and say, I want the world.

00:20:43.000 I want that which I can't even see.

00:20:45.000 He got a scouting guy came back and said, look, there are people with blonde hair and blue eyes in what was Russia.

00:20:51.000 And they said, we should go get those too.

00:20:53.000 And he was like, all right, let's go take them over too.

00:20:56.000 Well, not only that, they were willing to go through so much hardship.

00:21:00.000 They crossed into Moscow in the winter.

00:21:03.000 Yes.

00:21:04.000 Because there was this marshy area that you could only cross through in the winter when it was frozen solid.

00:21:09.000 But no one ever thought that anybody would do that.

00:21:12.000 Because it was so harsh.

00:21:13.000 The climate's so harsh.

00:21:14.000 Right. 0.99

00:21:14.000 The Mongols didn't give a fuck. 0.99

00:21:15.000 They never washed their clothes. 1.00

00:21:17.000 They ate rats.

00:21:17.000 They ate each other occasionally.

00:21:19.000 They'd run out of food.

00:21:21.000 That's disputed, apparently, according to Dan Carlin.

00:21:23.000 They would drink their mare's milk and blood.

00:21:26.000 Yeah.

00:21:26.000 They would cut their horses and then fill their class with horse and mare's blood.

00:21:32.000 And that's what they would survive on for days at a time.

00:21:34.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:21:35.000 They were just so fucking crazy. 0.99

00:21:36.000 I think life in the Gobi Desert on the steppe was already so insanely harsh. 0.99

00:21:41.000 Insanely harsh.

00:21:41.000 And you were primarily a carnivore.

00:21:43.000 The way they would hunt and catch birds and catch the deer and whatever was there with their horses.

00:21:50.000 It was just a very harsh, harsh way to live.

00:21:53.000 Well, there's a reality to people that you could always take more.

00:21:57.000 You know, most of the time, up until the point where it kills you, you could take more.

00:22:01.000 You know, I was watching Ronella, Meat Eater, the other day.

00:22:04.000 He had an episode on, I don't want to say the name wrong, Nanuvak Island outside of Alaska. 0.98

00:22:12.000 You can get to it when the fucking... 0.98

00:22:14.000 Ocean freezes. 0.99

00:22:16.000 You can walk there.

00:22:17.000 I'm not doing that hunting trip.

00:22:19.000 They take jet skis across the frozen ocean. 1.00

00:22:23.000 Damn. 1.00

00:22:23.000 Okay? 1.00

00:22:24.000 And these people are out there and they hunt for this thing called a muskox, which is this enormous beast of an animal, which I may go hunting in Greenland With Cam Haynes, we might do an archery muskox hunt, because apparently you can hunt them in the dry green. 1.00

00:22:39.000 You don't have to be an asshole and be out there in the middle of the fucking snow. 0.99

00:22:42.000 My dentist almost died hunting for muskox. 1.00

00:22:45.000 They apparently taste delicious.

00:22:48.000 They taste like ribeye steak.

00:22:50.000 It's like an incredibly delicious, big, fat animal, because they're just constantly eating to try to keep fat on to keep them warm.

00:22:57.000 Yeah.

00:22:57.000 And they're ridiculously cool looking, and there's a lot of them.

00:23:01.000 Are there a lot of them?

00:23:02.000 Yeah, and in Greenland apparently there are.

00:23:04.000 They thrive more.

00:23:06.000 So you can go hunting for them in the grass where it's not that cold.

00:23:09.000 Exactly.

00:23:09.000 Where you're doing it in the Arctic, if you're doing it in Alaska, you're hunting for them on these frozen tundras.

00:23:17.000 It's crazy to watch.

00:23:18.000 Sam Sheridan was telling me that they went to rescue them.

00:23:20.000 I think they were hunting muskox, but they went to rescue these guys who had been out on a hunt, and they were already, they were so cold, they were already dying of hypothermia, and when they got there, they were taking all their clothes off.

00:23:35.000 Because what happens, you know, the blood rushes to your, yeah, you think you're burning.

00:23:40.000 Oh, it's a scary way to die.

00:23:41.000 Meanwhile, you're going to go to the cryogenic chamber after this today.

00:23:44.000 Yes, I am.

00:23:45.000 For your first time.

00:23:45.000 To bring down my inflammation.

00:23:47.000 You got it everywhere, I guarantee.

00:23:49.000 Everybody does.

00:23:49.000 You're going to feel like a million bucks, too.

00:23:51.000 I'm kind of immortal.

00:23:52.000 Neoprenephrine, your brain produces this incredible anti-inflammatory and antidepressant.

00:23:57.000 Really?

00:23:57.000 You're going to feel great.

00:23:59.000 I'm going to come out hugging.

00:24:01.000 I'll come out hugging.

00:24:02.000 Moskox, yeah.

00:24:03.000 Oh, so this environment where these people lived, I was like, this is an incredible...

00:24:08.000 Like, the village was less than 200 people, and, you know, it's just nothing but white.

00:24:15.000 You look around, it's just frozen, everything.

00:24:17.000 The ground is flat and white and goes on for as far as the eye can see.

00:24:21.000 And these people are living there, man.

00:24:23.000 And they had the little kids, and their kids were living there, and they were all bundled up except their faces...

00:24:27.000 They're like, what's your favorite food?

00:24:30.000 He's like, I like to eat seal.

00:24:32.000 They eat the seal and walrus.

00:24:34.000 Walrus is my favorite food.

00:24:35.000 It's so weird.

00:24:36.000 They're eating walrus.

00:24:37.000 And they're staying alive.

00:24:38.000 If life started in East Africa, there were some people that just kept walking north. 1.00

00:24:42.000 Fuck Spain and the sunshine and the grass. 1.00

00:24:45.000 I don't want that. 1.00

00:24:45.000 Now let's go where it's icy and it gets dark at noon. 1.00

00:24:48.000 Yeah, this is home.

00:24:49.000 They didn't know any better, man.

00:24:51.000 They didn't know where they were going.

00:24:52.000 I mean, a lot of this, when this happened, people had a rudimentary understanding of navigation.

00:24:57.000 They just went in search of food and kept going.

00:25:00.000 Stayed together.

00:25:02.000 And then wound up here. 0.99

00:25:03.000 I mean, nobody would have gone across the fucking Bering Strait if they knew. 0.99

00:25:08.000 They just kept going. 0.99

00:25:11.000 They just kept going.

00:25:12.000 Really, everybody should have stayed in Africa. 1.00

00:25:14.000 Yeah, although the Fertile Crescent was even where you want to be, like Iraq, where numbers started, because you had grasses that grew like barley and millet and wheat, and it was easy, just the way, and you could domesticate animals.

00:25:27.000 You know, that's when they first started importing coffee.

00:25:30.000 That's why they call them Arabica, Arabica beans.

00:25:33.000 Oh, Arabica beans, really?

00:25:34.000 Yeah, it all came from Ethiopia, all of it. 0.91

00:25:36.000 Yes.

00:25:37.000 I heard that.

00:25:37.000 Yeah, I had a fascinating gentleman on my podcast.

00:25:41.000 What's his name?

00:25:43.000 Peter...

00:25:43.000 I'm trying to figure his last name.

00:25:45.000 Italian.

00:25:46.000 Find it.

00:25:48.000 He was a coffee guy?

00:25:49.000 Yeah, an expert.

00:25:50.000 A real coffee expert and a really cool guy.

00:25:53.000 And he ran down the history of What is his name?

00:25:57.000 Peter Giuliano.

00:25:59.000 The myth I've heard, and tell me if this is right, the myth I heard was that Ethiopian goat farmers were watching their goats eat these berries, and they would get a pep in their step and have more energy when they were done eating the berries.

00:26:10.000 Huh, that's interesting.

00:26:12.000 And then the shepherds were like, well, if they eat them, maybe I'll eat them.

00:26:15.000 Makes sense.

00:26:16.000 Yeah, and based on their other types of cooking, the way you would, you know, cook something, they said, let's try to roast these beans and see what happens.

00:26:24.000 That makes sense.

00:26:26.000 I wonder.

00:26:26.000 I wonder if that's the case.

00:26:27.000 You know, that was an issue with, that's how they figured out the cordyceps mushroom, too.

00:26:32.000 Cordyceps mushrooms, high-altitude herding populations.

00:26:34.000 They're watching their animals eat these mushrooms, and their animals would have, like, more energy. 0.95

00:26:38.000 They're like, huh, what the fuck's going on here? 0.74

00:26:40.000 And they figured out that it helps in oxygen utilization.

00:26:43.000 That was before, like, the Chinese Olympic team started using them.

00:26:45.000 Wow.

00:26:46.000 Yeah.

00:26:47.000 It's cool when, you know, you get animals to try out food for you and see if they die. 0.99

00:26:52.000 But the problem is, like, there's some shit that they can't eat that we can eat. 0.94

00:26:56.000 For the most part, though, they say that, like, with dogs, and if the dogs eat onions, it makes them anemic and stuff. 0.99

00:27:01.000 But for the most part, they say if a bird's eating it, I've heard this.

00:27:05.000 I don't know.

00:27:05.000 You can eat it.

00:27:06.000 You can eat it.

00:27:07.000 That makes sense.

00:27:07.000 If an animal's eating it.

00:27:08.000 But then again, I think birds eat certain berries.

00:27:10.000 I mean, there are certain berries and mushrooms you can eat.

00:27:12.000 You eat like half a mushroom and you're dead.

00:27:15.000 Yeah, there's certain mushrooms that look real similar to psychedelic mushrooms.

00:27:19.000 Yeah.

00:27:19.000 And if you eat them, you have like instant liver toxicity.

00:27:23.000 Like you might have to get a liver transplant.

00:27:25.000 Yeah, you're going to die. 1.00

00:27:26.000 How fucked is that, man? 1.00

00:27:27.000 You know, there was an old lady. 1.00

00:27:29.000 Well, not just one.

00:27:30.000 I think there were several people that died in a nursing home because this old guy or old gal, I forget which one it was, went out in search of mushrooms and brought back some mushrooms and cooked it for everyone in the nursing home. 0.99

00:27:42.000 And they fucking died. 0.99

00:27:44.000 Well, you know, the oleander is super poisonous. 1.00

00:27:46.000 And I heard...

00:27:47.000 What is oleander?

00:27:48.000 Oleander is...

00:27:50.000 You see it, it's like a nonscript kind of bush with, you know, big kind of long cylindrical leaves.

00:27:56.000 And these guys used an oleander branch to cook their lamb.

00:28:01.000 These tourists, they ran an oleander branch. 0.99

00:28:04.000 And whatever, whatever happened, the sap got in the meat and they fucking died. 0.99

00:28:09.000 What? 0.99

00:28:10.000 And then they had this really expensive racehorse.

00:28:13.000 And I don't remember where this, you know, this racehorse is $100 million or something.

00:28:17.000 Somehow that racehorse ate a couple of oleander leaves and died. 0.99

00:28:22.000 God damn. 0.99

00:28:23.000 Why did you have oleander near the horse's stable? 1.00

00:28:26.000 Let's see a picture of oleander, Jamie.

00:28:27.000 It's like a flower. 0.99

00:28:28.000 I need to know that this stuff is that fucking toxic. 0.99

00:28:32.000 That stuff right there? 0.99

00:28:33.000 I believe so.

00:28:34.000 So pretty.

00:28:35.000 Yeah, it is. 0.97

00:28:35.000 Isn't it weird that like a lot of really pretty things are fucking terrible for you? 0.97

00:28:39.000 Uh-huh. 0.99

00:28:40.000 Like girls? 0.95

00:28:44.000 You could lose your house.

00:28:45.000 Careful!

00:28:46.000 The guys that are not used to really hot girls and you see it coming. 0.98

00:28:51.000 The guys who didn't get those girls in high school and college and then what happens is they get famous and they're 38 and 40 and they're kind of dorky. 0.87

00:29:00.000 Or rich. 0.67

00:29:00.000 They don't have to get famous. 0.67

00:29:01.000 And then they date that trophy wife. 1.00

00:29:03.000 Or they meet a girl in a strip club or whatever it is.

00:29:06.000 You've got to be careful.

00:29:06.000 I was at this steakhouse the other night in Beverly Hills.

00:29:10.000 Like a very swank place.

00:29:12.000 I don't need to name the place.

00:29:13.000 Alright, sorry. 0.99

00:29:14.000 Very swank establishment, but I was astonished by the number of disgusting men with attractive women. 0.98

00:29:21.000 I was like, this is fascinating. 0.99

00:29:23.000 Like, this guy, I hope he can play a mean set of drums or fucking belt out a great tune or something. 0.87

00:29:29.000 I mean, how did he get her? 0.97

00:29:30.000 Like, what's going on here?

00:29:31.000 Just really, really rich guys.

00:29:33.000 Oh, dude, in Beverly Hills especially, that is where the oldest profession in the world is rampant.

00:29:38.000 Just prostitution. 1.00

00:29:40.000 It's a different kind of prostitution because it's legal. 1.00

00:29:43.000 You're just professional girlfriends and wives for really ugly dudes. 1.00

00:29:48.000 It's a girl you keep. 1.00

00:29:49.000 Mad cash.

00:29:51.000 She's got an apartment. 1.00

00:29:52.000 She's got a house. 0.99

00:29:53.000 I mean, she's got a car.

00:29:55.000 She gets first class tickets.

00:29:57.000 Another thing we found fascinating was the amount of Arab license plates.

00:30:01.000 Saudi Arabian plates. 1.00

00:30:03.000 They fly their fucking supercars over here. 1.00

00:30:05.000 There was a... 1.00

00:30:08.000 Bugatti Veyron, which is a one-point-something million-dollar car.

00:30:11.000 This insane car.

00:30:12.000 And the palace plate, it said something palace, because I was with a friend who's Persian, and he reads Arabic.

00:30:19.000 And it said palace, and the number plate was like 222,222.

00:30:26.000 That was the plate. 0.96

00:30:27.000 It was all twos and it said Palace and it was this fucking, I don't know, like one point something million dollar car. 0.98

00:30:33.000 Well, you like cars, right? 0.98

00:30:35.000 I don't like those.

00:30:36.000 What is that car?

00:30:37.000 What is the point of that?

00:30:37.000 Well, here's the problem with those cars.

00:30:39.000 I mean, they're incredible pieces of technology.

00:30:42.000 I mean, they're undeniable.

00:30:44.000 The speed, the power, the opulence, the interior is gorgeous and beautiful.

00:30:49.000 And it's one of those things that Floyd Mayweather drives around in.

00:30:52.000 But...

00:30:53.000 What I like is I like cars that are tactile.

00:30:56.000 I don't even necessarily like new cars.

00:30:58.000 Something that can really drive.

00:31:01.000 Yeah, I'm moving towards older and older cars.

00:31:04.000 My Porsche is the newest car that I have.

00:31:06.000 That's a 2007. And that's the last year that they made the GT3 or the last model that they made the GT3 RS the way mine is.

00:31:15.000 It doesn't have any...

00:31:16.000 There's no stability control.

00:31:18.000 There's some traction control, limited amount of traction control.

00:31:21.000 That's it.

00:31:21.000 It's a race car.

00:31:22.000 And you can shut that off and you're on your own.

00:31:24.000 You just have this 520 pound horsepower, ridiculously light car that you feel everything.

00:31:28.000 Are you telling me it only weighs 520 pounds?

00:31:31.000 No, no, no.

00:31:31.000 520 horsepower.

00:31:32.000 Oh, okay.

00:31:33.000 It's less than 3,000 pounds.

00:31:34.000 Wow.

00:31:34.000 But somewhere around 3,000 pounds.

00:31:36.000 Yeah, okay.

00:31:37.000 What I'm interested in, honestly, is like 1970s cars, like 1970 Porsche that's 2,000 pounds, like 1,000 pounds less and less powerful.

00:31:46.000 But you feel everything.

00:31:48.000 No power steering. 0.99

00:31:49.000 You feel the fucking bumps of the car. 1.00

00:31:51.000 You feel the road. 1.00

00:31:52.000 You feel the, like, literally you feel in your ass. 1.00

00:31:55.000 Tactile is the right word for it. 1.00

00:31:55.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:31:56.000 You feel when the car's rear end is breaking loose.

00:31:59.000 You feel when the tires are losing traction, you're sliding a little bit.

00:32:02.000 That's fun.

00:32:03.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:32:04.000 Like all this other shit, like these Bugattis. 1.00

00:32:06.000 It's physical. 0.99

00:32:06.000 They're all computers. 0.99

00:32:07.000 It's like...

00:32:07.000 I drove a Nissan GT-R. Do you know what one of those are?

00:32:11.000 No.

00:32:11.000 It's this incredibly technologically sophisticated rocket ship that Nissan's built.

00:32:17.000 It's almost like a...

00:32:19.000 Proof-of-concept vehicle like they almost like them.

00:32:23.000 They lose money on it. 0.69

00:32:24.000 It's a flagship vehicle, and it's so fucking unbelievably Ridiculously competent and fast that car right there goes zero to 60 in less than three seconds. 0.94

00:32:33.000 It's pretty understated. 0.82

00:32:35.000 It's not like well, it's it's Everything's functional that car as it's not about like I think it looks cool because it looks like a spaceship.

00:32:42.000 Yeah But everything about it is about aerodynamics and about keeping the body pinned to the ground.

00:32:49.000 It's heavy.

00:32:50.000 It's about 3,900 pounds.

00:32:52.000 So it's like 900 pounds more than my car is.

00:32:55.000 And it's four-wheel drive, which race car drivers traditionally like a rear-wheel drive car because they like the feel that it's pushing.

00:33:04.000 Instead of pulling, they like the control that you get because you can kind of steer with the throttle.

00:33:10.000 If you know, as you're going into a turn...

00:33:13.000 There's a thing called oversteer, right?

00:33:14.000 So if you're going into a turn, and as you're going into a turn, you can hit the gas, and your SN will kick out, and it'll change the angle of your entry into the turn.

00:33:25.000 You've got to know how to do it just right.

00:33:27.000 You have to have this feel.

00:33:31.000 It's more fun than anything, because really the correct line, if you're on a race course, is to have no ass end kick out.

00:33:38.000 You want everything to be glued. 0.97

00:33:41.000 Every time your ass end kicks out, if you're racing, you're going to lose seconds. 0.99

00:33:44.000 But for fun, guys who love those kind of 9-11, like a 1970 9-11, one of the things they like about it is the ass end will kick out. 0.99

00:33:54.000 This guy, Chris Harris, I've had him in here. 0.94

00:33:56.000 Call it tail happy.

00:33:57.000 Yeah, it's oversteer.

00:34:00.000 Chris Harris is a very famous automotive journalist from the UK, and he takes it to the next level.

00:34:07.000 He likes to power slide around corners.

00:34:10.000 It's amazing.

00:34:12.000 Well, watching him do it, he's an artist at it, and he's going around corners in these cars.

00:34:16.000 Every car he reviews, he takes and he power slides everywhere. 0.99

00:34:21.000 It's just power sliding these fucking things. 0.98

00:34:26.000 Google Chris Harris GT3 RS, 2016 GT3 RS. He's literally going sideways around corners with a 500 horsepower, $200,000 Porsche that they let him borrow. 0.99

00:34:40.000 That's badass.

00:34:41.000 So they let him borrow this car.

00:34:42.000 He's just beating the fuck out of it everywhere he goes.

00:34:45.000 No, that's an old one. 0.95

00:34:47.000 No, that's my year.

00:34:50.000 That's like a 2007. 2016 GT3. Go down there.

00:34:55.000 It says GT3 RS accelerations and power slide.

00:35:00.000 Yeah, you can see it probably over there.

00:35:02.000 You won't see Chris Harris do it, but you'll see a car that does it. 0.98

00:35:06.000 And the idea is that these guys go around these fucking corners, and they go around these corners using the ass end of the car, like using... 0.98

00:35:17.000 No, let's see if they do it later. 0.99

00:35:22.000 But anyway, it's just fun.

00:35:24.000 Chris Harris, GT3 RS, 2016. Google that.

00:35:31.000 And then you'll see Chris Harris on cars.

00:35:34.000 Top one.

00:35:35.000 Top one.

00:35:36.000 Yeah.

00:35:36.000 Now go like three-quarters of the way in there and you'll see him on a racetrack with it even further.

00:35:43.000 Yeah, here's this crazy fucker. 1.00

00:35:45.000 Like this guy's a madman and he just knows how to drive. 1.00

00:35:48.000 Yeah, he does. 0.87

00:35:51.000 See, right there, he's just leaving a little bit of rubber.

00:35:53.000 He's just trying to go fast, as fast as he can.

00:35:56.000 See how he's taking these lines, the outside to the inside?

00:35:59.000 It's all about trying to go around corners in as straight a line as possible, so that you have as little pressure on the tires sideways as possible.

00:36:11.000 It's all about choosing the correct line to go around the corners most efficiently.

00:36:17.000 He couldn't be more macho, by the way.

00:36:18.000 No, he's not.

00:36:19.000 He's a gentleman. 0.99

00:36:20.000 He just looks like a thug.

00:36:21.000 No, he's not in real life, though. 0.76

00:36:22.000 But here, see all that rubber?

00:36:24.000 Look, he's going sideways around that corner.

00:36:26.000 See that? 1.00

00:36:27.000 Damn! 1.00

00:36:28.000 Give some volume so you can hear that. 1.00

00:36:30.000 Because he's having a great fucking time. 0.99

00:36:32.000 We won't even hear it. 0.99

00:36:33.000 We don't have our headsets on.

00:36:39.000 Slippy feeling. 1.00

00:36:40.000 That guy fucking loves cars. 1.00

00:36:43.000 See that? 1.00

00:36:50.000 See, if you have a car and you're selling it, you want a motherfucker like this reviewing it. 0.99

00:36:57.000 This guy loves cars. 0.99

00:36:59.000 He loves them. 1.00

00:37:01.000 And he's smart as shit. 0.99

00:37:02.000 He really understands automobiles. 0.99

00:37:05.000 It's funny how you have, when you talk like this, you sound really, really smart.

00:37:09.000 Oh, yeah, man. 1.00

00:37:10.000 That's why they sell fucking mops with that voice. 1.00

00:37:12.000 Right. 1.00

00:37:12.000 Do you want this mop? 1.00

00:37:14.000 This mop is so much more sophisticated than that mop you're going to buy.

00:37:18.000 That's right.

00:37:19.000 It's simulated to musk ox, and it's got really fantastic... 0.98

00:37:25.000 Supping ability. 0.98

00:37:26.000 See, you don't find a thrill in this sort of automotive fuckery. 0.99

00:37:31.000 Me, no. 0.98

00:37:31.000 There's nothing about this that's appealing to you. 0.98

00:37:33.000 Look at that.

00:37:33.000 Look at that power slide.

00:37:34.000 If Bernard Hopkins is talking about how he sets up his jab, that's interesting to me.

00:37:37.000 How is this not interesting to you?

00:37:39.000 I've never been interested in cars.

00:37:41.000 You got a broken gene. 0.92

00:37:43.000 There's something wrong with you. 0.99

00:37:43.000 You're not even American. 0.99

00:37:44.000 I know.

00:37:45.000 You were born in another country. 1.00

00:37:45.000 That's what it is. 1.00

00:37:46.000 Well, no, but other countries...

00:37:47.000 What were you born?

00:37:48.000 Remember, other countries like in Europe.

00:37:49.000 What country, though?

00:37:50.000 Where were you born?

00:37:50.000 I was born in the Philippines.

00:37:51.000 That's the thing.

00:37:52.000 Philippines, not known for their cars.

00:37:53.000 I bet you get crazy when you see a scooter.

00:37:56.000 I bet if you see, like, one of those...

00:37:57.000 I do.

00:37:57.000 I go crazy when I see a moped.

00:37:59.000 When I see a rickshaw. 1.00

00:38:04.000 You give him a raw coconut, he loses his fucking mind. 1.00

00:38:07.000 I go nuts. 1.00

00:38:07.000 Yeah, I just never... 1.00

00:38:09.000 Maybe that's what it is.

00:38:10.000 I was into Bruce Lee.

00:38:12.000 I was always into physical things like that.

00:38:14.000 Although, is race car driving a sport?

00:38:17.000 Absolutely.

00:38:17.000 I think so, right?

00:38:18.000 100%.

00:38:18.000 It seems like it would be.

00:38:19.000 I mean, it's you're managing your body as well as managing an automobile.

00:38:24.000 Right.

00:38:24.000 You, without a doubt...

00:38:25.000 Like, Formula One's got to be a sport.

00:38:27.000 Well, it's all your own movements.

00:38:29.000 Your movements are dictating the movements of the car.

00:38:31.000 Your movements of the wheel, especially in the old days when they would actually shift with a clutch.

00:38:35.000 Now everything's paddle shifters.

00:38:37.000 Why do you think Formula One is so huge in Europe and everywhere else and not at all in the United States? 0.99

00:38:43.000 Because we got our own NASCAR up in this bitch, son! 1.00

00:38:47.000 Is that big? 1.00

00:38:48.000 I guess it is.

00:38:49.000 It's huge.

00:38:50.000 If you ever go to the South, you ever go to the radio in Georgia and they start talking to you about NASCAR and you're like, what?

00:38:57.000 Did you see what Dale did last weekend?

00:38:59.000 I'll tell you, boy, let me tell you what.

00:39:01.000 That guy knows how to drive a car.

00:39:03.000 I'll tell you what.

00:39:04.000 A car.

00:39:04.000 Oh, he's driving a car.

00:39:06.000 Who's Dale?

00:39:08.000 You didn't see the NASCAR? Isn't NASCAR not as technical?

00:39:16.000 All I know is they let chicks do it now. 1.00

00:39:19.000 So they let girls do it, and you know something's up. 1.00

00:39:23.000 You know something's up with that sport. 1.00

00:39:25.000 Seems like I could probably do it better, since I do have a penis. 0.99

00:39:30.000 Are they competing with men? 0.99

00:39:31.000 I think of all they claim to be.

00:39:34.000 I think that Danica Patrick chick, she wins, right? 1.00

00:39:36.000 That's downright un-American. 1.00

00:39:37.000 But she's tough as shit, man. 0.99

00:39:38.000 She's probably the Ronda Rousey of race car driving. 1.00

00:39:41.000 Yeah.

00:39:41.000 She knows how to do it.

00:39:42.000 Easy on the eyes, too.

00:39:43.000 Not a bad-looking gal.

00:39:44.000 Not at all. 0.99

00:39:45.000 That's a tough fucking sport, though, for sure. 0.99

00:39:48.000 You've got to maintain your nerves. 0.99

00:39:50.000 You've got to figure out when to hit the gas, when to hit the brakes.

00:39:53.000 You've got to know when to make your move. 1.00

00:39:54.000 And you're piloting that fucking car. 0.99

00:39:56.000 It's not automated in any way, shape, or form. 1.00

00:39:58.000 It's all up to you to decide how to bust a move.

00:40:01.000 It's super dangerous, and your reaction time means a lot, right?

00:40:04.000 Do they have a clutch?

00:40:05.000 Does NASCAR have a clutch?

00:40:06.000 Are those things automatics?

00:40:10.000 I think they got clutches.

00:40:11.000 I would hope so.

00:40:13.000 Being American and all.

00:40:14.000 Being American. 1.00

00:40:15.000 I hope they make those motherfuckers shift their own gears. 1.00

00:40:18.000 Like Tom Cruise in Days of Thunder. 1.00

00:40:21.000 NASCAR. I'm only seeing like power shifting maybe.

00:40:25.000 I don't think...

00:40:26.000 They don't have a clutch?

00:40:28.000 What happened, America?

00:40:30.000 What did we do with the left pedal?

00:40:33.000 We need the left pedal!

00:40:35.000 Bring back the left pedal! 0.91

00:40:36.000 Yeah, man. 0.99

00:40:37.000 You sumbitches. 1.00

00:40:38.000 You need to drive a fucking real car, man. 1.00

00:40:41.000 I have. 0.99

00:40:42.000 Just go get yourself a Mustang GT350 when they come out.

00:40:46.000 I keep filling it with gas, man. 0.99

00:40:47.000 Shut the fuck up with this gas jazz. 1.00

00:40:50.000 I need something that's safe. 1.00

00:40:50.000 What are you, what are you, are you busy every minute of every day? 1.00

00:40:53.000 I'm very busy. 1.00

00:40:54.000 You can't stop at a gas station and put the fucking thing in the slot and go get yourself a Red Bull. 0.99

00:40:58.000 I get swarmed by fans. 1.00

00:40:58.000 I can't do it. 1.00

00:40:59.000 Do you?

00:40:59.000 You get swarmed?

00:41:00.000 No.

00:41:00.000 Yeah, swarmed.

00:41:01.000 Holy shit. 1.00

00:41:02.000 At the gas station. 0.99

00:41:03.000 It's Brian Cowell.

00:41:03.000 It's the kid.

00:41:04.000 It's the kid.

00:41:05.000 Hey, man.

00:41:06.000 Jesus!

00:41:07.000 What is that, a Volkswagen?

00:41:09.000 Is that a Passat?

00:41:10.000 Is that a diesel?

00:41:11.000 No, I'm kidding.

00:41:11.000 I think I'm going to get the Tesla.

00:41:12.000 What do you think?

00:41:13.000 Great car.

00:41:14.000 I love it.

00:41:15.000 Yeah, I would buy one. 1.00

00:41:15.000 The only thing I wouldn't buy it for is if, like, you ever have to take your family out of the state, if fucking shit hits the fan. 1.00

00:41:20.000 Good luck. 1.00

00:41:21.000 Oh, I got another car for that.

00:41:22.000 Well, you need another car for that.

00:41:23.000 Yeah, I got a Highlander for that.

00:41:25.000 Well, that's a good move.

00:41:26.000 Yeah.

00:41:26.000 Those are great.

00:41:27.000 Those are great cars.

00:41:27.000 Yeah, I mean for a car around town, it's awesome.

00:41:30.000 And you know, the other thing is, if you install solar on your house, you could fucking power that thing easily with solar power. 0.64

00:41:38.000 I just did. 0.91

00:41:38.000 That's pretty interesting. 0.91

00:41:40.000 I mean, obviously it costs money for the batteries and the setup and the maintenance and all that jazz, but at the end of the day, Once the money is spent on setting it up and the operating costs are fairly minimal in comparison to what it would cost to get electricity off the grid, you can be totally off the grid if you choose to be. 0.99

00:41:57.000 And you can also power your fucking car with all this shit. 0.96

00:42:01.000 And if the grid goes down, you can keep your power. 1.00

00:42:03.000 There's ways to set that up.

00:42:05.000 What's interesting is when you put solar panels in your house, which I did, just try getting, it'll take you, the electric company, it's been three months now and they still haven't converted us.

00:42:16.000 They just take their sweet time.

00:42:18.000 What do you mean?

00:42:19.000 They keep charging you?

00:42:20.000 Yes, they have not yet given us the okay to switch over.

00:42:25.000 What does that mean?

00:42:25.000 What's the okay?

00:42:26.000 They've got to just give you the okay.

00:42:28.000 They have to give you some kind of a form.

00:42:30.000 So are you still spending money on electricity?

00:42:32.000 Yes, I am.

00:42:33.000 But is the electricity being generated by solar or by...

00:42:36.000 Nope.

00:42:36.000 By them still.

00:42:37.000 They will not let us turn ourselves on yet.

00:42:39.000 They won't let you turn your thing over. 0.99

00:42:40.000 What the fuck is that? 0.99

00:42:41.000 Until we get a permit. 0.99

00:42:42.000 And guess who has to do that?

00:42:43.000 Some bureaucrat in the electric company.

00:42:46.000 Whoa, so they're dragging their heels.

00:42:48.000 They're trying to keep people from going solar.

00:42:50.000 Yes.

00:42:51.000 You sure about that?

00:42:51.000 Yeah.

00:42:52.000 Are you sure about the oil prices too, man?

00:42:54.000 Come on.

00:42:54.000 Yeah.

00:42:55.000 I know these things.

00:42:56.000 The government tinfoil conspiracy.

00:42:57.000 I follow these things.

00:42:59.000 I feel like there's got to be some way.

00:43:01.000 Well, look, man, here's how I feel.

00:43:03.000 Like, as far as conspiracy is concerned, I believe more in ignorance.

00:43:06.000 So, you know, government, as my buddy who works, I just was at his wedding, and he said, he goes, if you think the government's really efficient, and he's talking about intelligence or any of that stuff, he goes, I've been in the inner circle.

00:43:17.000 He said, it's not.

00:43:18.000 You just have to work for the government to know.

00:43:20.000 Yes, we do some cool stuff, but this, a lot of it's just not as organized.

00:43:24.000 I'm sure.

00:43:25.000 And I was thinking about this.

00:43:26.000 Like, people tease me for being a history guy.

00:43:29.000 I'm not like Dan Carlin, but I try to, you know, read my history.

00:43:34.000 I was thinking about this.

00:43:36.000 You know, this new Harvard study just came out, and it said that 170,000 veterans from our recent wars in Afghanistan and Iraq, starting in 2003, we have 170,000 people that are 70% or more disabled.

00:43:53.000 That is probably going to cost over their lifetime in the American economy $6 trillion to care for those people, which according to the study, you could purse out to be $75,000 of an American family.

00:44:07.000 Forget the cost.

00:44:08.000 Think about 170,000 people that are 70% or more disabled.

00:44:12.000 These are veterans. 1.00

00:44:13.000 These are people that answered the call and they're all fucked up. 0.98

00:44:17.000 I was thinking about how if the more you read about this war and how we got into it, a lot of it was because we didn't know the history of that country. 0.99

00:44:26.000 And a lot of it was because we didn't know the history of the entire region.

00:44:30.000 And I would make that argument.

00:44:32.000 And my point is that it's really easy for all of us as voters It's to go about life without doing the right investigation.

00:44:41.000 So when you vote for somebody and you vote for a policy, most of us vote along party lines because our team is over here or because we're not a liberal or we're not a conservative, we're not a Republican, we're not a Democrat.

00:44:53.000 Instead of looking at the world as, wait a minute, we're going to go into Iraq? 0.76

00:44:58.000 Hmm.

00:44:59.000 That's an interesting thing, man.

00:45:01.000 How much do we know about the history?

00:45:02.000 How much do we know about how that country is structured?

00:45:04.000 And how much do we know about what's going to happen when we destabilize that regime?

00:45:08.000 And when most of Congress didn't know the difference between Sunni and Shia, which is so important in Middle Eastern politics, that schism.

00:45:17.000 And we're voting in these policies, and I think that we could have avoided some major tragedy.

00:45:24.000 I don't know. 0.99

00:45:25.000 I'm just saying that the more you know, the less likely you are to make these major fucking mistakes. 1.00

00:45:31.000 You know what's fucked, too? 1.00

00:45:32.000 Because you're kind of damned if you do, and you're damned if you don't when it comes to Iraq. 1.00

00:45:36.000 Because if you think about leaving that guy there, Saddam Hussein was a fucking piece of shit of epic proportions. 1.00

00:45:42.000 And his children were absolute serial killers. 1.00

00:45:45.000 Yes.

00:45:46.000 His children, there is a story about him and his children from, I forget what magazine it was, maybe like Esquire or something like that from back in the day, GQ, something. 0.89

00:45:56.000 But it was a terrifying story of all the atrocities that his sons have committed, including taking women on their wedding day as they were being married, kidnapping them, raping them, and then feeding them to dogs.

00:46:08.000 Yeah, Uday Hussein. 0.97

00:46:09.000 Feeding the husband to dogs.

00:46:10.000 Uday Hussein used to do all kinds of sadistic things, but think about the untold misery that that entire region now over the past 15 years, or actually 13 years, has dealt with.

00:46:21.000 Yeah. 0.98

00:46:21.000 Think about how many children and how many people, think about the Yazidi women sold off into slavery by these ISIL assholes and the spawning of ISIL. I think they need to fucking come up with a standardized name. 0.98

00:46:33.000 I'm tired of hearing ISIL, ISIS, ISS. Yeah, Islamic State. 0.99

00:46:36.000 Just say Islamic State. 0.97

00:46:38.000 The space station.

00:46:39.000 There's too many different...

00:46:41.000 There are. 1.00

00:46:41.000 There's too many fucking... 1.00

00:46:42.000 ISIS, ISIL. Yeah. 1.00

00:46:44.000 What the fuck? 1.00

00:46:44.000 You're the first guy I've ever heard say ISIL. I've seen it written. 1.00

00:46:47.000 I'm like, what is this?

00:46:49.000 You know?

00:46:49.000 I said it because it sounds fancy because I don't know what...

00:46:52.000 It's like when John Cougar Mellencamp turned into John Mellencamp.

00:46:56.000 Yeah.

00:46:57.000 Remember?

00:46:58.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:46:58.000 What the fuck? 1.00

00:46:59.000 He made a stand. 1.00

00:47:00.000 He made a stand.

00:47:01.000 He used to be John Cougar Mellencamp.

00:47:03.000 No, he was John Mellencamp, right?

00:47:04.000 No, he was John Cougar first.

00:47:06.000 No, he was John Cougar Mellencamp, wasn't he?

00:47:08.000 The first time he came out, I want to say he was John Cougar, and then he became John Cougar Mellencamp.

00:47:13.000 His real name is John Mellencamp, obviously.

00:47:15.000 Yeah.

00:47:16.000 Oh, so he changed?

00:47:17.000 Oh, no.

00:47:17.000 He didn't give himself the name Cougar.

00:47:20.000 No, no, no.

00:47:20.000 I believe that the record company did.

00:47:22.000 Here we go.

00:47:22.000 Well, that's terrible.

00:47:23.000 Little Diddy.

00:47:25.000 By the way, great song.

00:47:28.000 John Cougar titled Miami in Australia.

00:47:31.000 What?

00:47:31.000 Yeah, it's 1979. It's called Miami in Australia?

00:47:35.000 They call his album Miami or he's Miami?

00:47:38.000 I don't know.

00:47:39.000 But wait, John Cougar? 1.00

00:47:42.000 I would have told the record company to go, fuck, that's a terrible... 0.99

00:47:45.000 So the album is called Miami if you're in Australia. 0.99

00:47:49.000 Australia's like, yeah, mate, we're not going to buy it, mate.

00:47:52.000 This whole thing with John Cougar, just John Cougar, it's not good enough.

00:47:57.000 Mate, we need something spicy.

00:47:59.000 Why don't you name it after my army?

00:48:01.000 Change your name to Joe Panther.

00:48:02.000 We've seen girls from Miami. 1.00

00:48:03.000 They have big asses. 1.00

00:48:04.000 We like that. 1.00

00:48:06.000 Call it Miami.

00:48:07.000 We'll sell more.

00:48:09.000 It's a terrible Australian accent. 0.99

00:48:10.000 I did my best.

00:48:12.000 No, it's not bad.

00:48:12.000 It's a hard one.

00:48:13.000 I only have a few Australian friends.

00:48:14.000 I need to call them.

00:48:16.000 It's a hard one.

00:48:17.000 Jonah the shimp on the barbie. 0.96

00:48:19.000 Oh, by the way, my second show for Melbourne is almost sold out, so...

00:48:24.000 Good Lord. 0.99

00:48:24.000 If you're thinking about going, you fucks, you better act now. 0.99

00:48:29.000 Sold! 1.00

00:48:29.000 First one sold out. 1.00

00:48:30.000 Selling out over oceans.

00:48:31.000 Very close to selling out.

00:48:33.000 Nice, you're famous.

00:48:33.000 I haven't been to Melbourne.

00:48:35.000 Never.

00:48:36.000 I'm excited.

00:48:37.000 It's supposed to be like the San Francisco of Australia.

00:48:40.000 Really?

00:48:40.000 Like sophisticated...

00:48:42.000 And very rich in culture.

00:48:45.000 They supposedly have an amazing food scene.

00:48:47.000 The food in Melbourne is supposed to be spectacular.

00:48:50.000 I keep hearing that.

00:48:51.000 I saw an Anthony Bourdain episode about it, too.

00:48:53.000 He went there and sampled some of the cuisine.

00:48:55.000 I've not watched enough of Anthony or Bourdain.

00:48:58.000 He's the best. 0.96

00:48:59.000 I love the shit out of it, too. 0.64

00:49:00.000 He's my boyfriend.

00:49:01.000 You love him?

00:49:01.000 He's great.

00:49:02.000 Yeah.

00:49:02.000 He's 58 years old, the guy gets into jujitsu, just earns his blue belt.

00:49:05.000 It's fantastic.

00:49:06.000 He's a junkie when he was younger, like almost overdosed and died, smoked cigarettes until he had a kid, had the kid said, you know what, I gotta quit smoking cigarettes.

00:49:13.000 Had a kid like 50, you know?

00:49:15.000 I mean, I just love him.

00:49:17.000 It's a great second act. 1.00

00:49:18.000 He's a bad motherfucker. 0.99

00:49:18.000 And it's also, I like the fact that he's a real artist, like with food. 0.99

00:49:24.000 It made me, watching his show, the No Reservation Show, made me reconsider what food is.

00:49:29.000 Not, you know, I always appreciated food, but I always said, oh, this guy, this restaurant's great.

00:49:34.000 Like, we used to go to great restaurants all the time.

00:49:36.000 And you'd be like, oh, I found this great Italian place.

00:49:38.000 We'd go have a bottle of wine.

00:49:39.000 Oh, this food's awesome.

00:49:40.000 But I didn't think about the food as...

00:49:42.000 The artistry.

00:49:42.000 Yes.

00:49:43.000 Yeah, the creativity that goes into, like, changing something, turning it on its ear.

00:49:47.000 Yeah.

00:49:47.000 At this wedding, I had some salmon and some steak.

00:49:51.000 And salmon and steak is pretty standard.

00:49:53.000 And I've been alive a long time.

00:49:55.000 And I ate that salmon and that steak with a certain sauce on it.

00:49:58.000 And I stopped.

00:49:59.000 I stopped.

00:50:01.000 And I went, alright, hold on.

00:50:02.000 Something is going on here.

00:50:05.000 And I'm having a little issue because I've never had salmon like this. 0.80

00:50:10.000 And for me to say I've never had sandwich I've eaten one million times or I've never had steak that tastes like this, that's a big fucking deal, especially because I really pay attention.

00:50:18.000 And I ran down there and I saw this cook with a ponytail, kind of a skinny dude, and I was like, what are you doing? 0.92

00:50:25.000 What happened?

00:50:26.000 He goes, oh, do you like it?

00:50:27.000 I said...

00:50:28.000 Yeah, I like it.

00:50:30.000 It's a little transcendent.

00:50:31.000 If you know me, I'll get exaggerated.

00:50:34.000 And I said, and correct me if I'm wrong, sir, but you cut small pieces here, and you are taking into consideration the relationship between the meat and And your crazy delicious yam cake.

00:50:49.000 Yeah.

00:50:50.000 And this sauce that looks like it was made in heaven.

00:50:54.000 I've never seen green that you kind of spill just so.

00:51:00.000 It would look like... 1.00

00:51:01.000 It looked like a fucking green pond that I could drink from. 0.99

00:51:08.000 Meanwhile, he looks at me and he goes, yes, he said, relationship is very important as is proportion. 0.99

00:51:14.000 Most people think they need to create a big piece.

00:51:16.000 But the minute you see it, I go, I finish the sentence, I go, I want more.

00:51:21.000 He goes, exactly.

00:51:22.000 Exactly.

00:51:23.000 Here's why he's wrong.

00:51:24.000 Because he's never had barbecue in Texas. 0.99

00:51:26.000 If he did, he would want to eat until his fucking body wanted to explode. 0.99

00:51:30.000 I had a bunch of fixins. 1.00

00:51:32.000 I went to this place called Black's that was outside of Austin.

00:51:35.000 It is the oldest barbecue place in Texas.

00:51:38.000 I put I put a picture of it up on my Instagram of the food.

00:51:42.000 Me and Aubrey and my buddy Ben O'Brien, we had the most insane beef ribs I've ever eaten in my life.

00:51:49.000 Beef ribs are generally kind of chewy. 1.00

00:51:51.000 Not these fucking things. 1.00

00:51:52.000 They cooked them for years. 1.00

00:51:54.000 They shot that cow in the 80s, and they've been cooking them ever since.

00:51:59.000 Aubrey brought some into the office.

00:52:00.000 I think it was from Black's. 1.00

00:52:02.000 No, no, no.

00:52:02.000 He brought it from Frederick's, which is another insane place, but that's in Austin.

00:52:07.000 See that on the left?

00:52:08.000 Yeah.

00:52:08.000 That piece of meat?

00:52:09.000 That was so fucking insanely tender and delicious. 0.98

00:52:14.000 That place... 1.00

00:52:16.000 Apparently, it's a real landmark in Texas, Blacks. 1.00

00:52:19.000 Everything else was really good.

00:52:20.000 The spare ribs were good.

00:52:21.000 The brisket was really good. 1.00

00:52:23.000 But goddammit, if you go there, you gotta fuck with those beef ribs. 1.00

00:52:26.000 They're insane. 1.00

00:52:28.000 We were all just blown away. 1.00

00:52:30.000 The three of us were like, what the fuck, man? 1.00

00:52:32.000 And we ate until we almost exploded. 1.00

00:52:35.000 Yeah, that looks ridiculous. 0.91

00:52:36.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:52:37.000 Go eat at Blacks, and then go to the Honor Academy, and go have John Wolfe take you through one workout. 0.99

00:52:43.000 Oh, he's great.

00:52:44.000 Dude.

00:52:44.000 He's great.

00:52:45.000 I was like, hey, John, what are you, like, first of all, he couldn't be thicker.

00:52:48.000 I was like, what are you, what's your national?

00:52:50.000 He's very flexible.

00:52:51.000 He's ridiculously flexible, with long arms.

00:52:53.000 He's like, yeah, I'm Japanese, Mexican, and English.

00:52:56.000 Interesting, very warlike combination of people.

00:52:59.000 Very warlike.

00:53:00.000 He's the sweetest guy ever.

00:53:01.000 He's the last guy I would ever call warlike. 0.99

00:53:02.000 No, sweet as shit, but can put you in a world of pain with no weights. 0.99

00:53:06.000 Just using body weight. 0.99

00:53:07.000 Oh, yeah.

00:53:07.000 He has a crazy hip complex series that he does.

00:53:10.000 Which we did.

00:53:11.000 Yeah.

00:53:11.000 Oh, it's amazing, right?

00:53:12.000 It's so weird.

00:53:13.000 Like, you get weird pain afterwards. 0.99

00:53:15.000 You're like, ow, why is the inside of my dick hurting? 0.99

00:53:18.000 It's so true. 1.00

00:53:20.000 It makes you do all this crazy shit with your legs. 1.00

00:53:23.000 He does it with a smile, too. 0.98

00:53:23.000 He's like, we're just going to take you to do some mobility exercises. 0.98

00:53:25.000 I was like, all right.

00:53:26.000 Well, Aubrey and I were there for my show.

00:53:29.000 I did a show at the Moody Theater, which is insane.

00:53:32.000 Probably one of the best shows of my life.

00:53:33.000 It was amazing.

00:53:34.000 It's crazy. 0.98

00:53:35.000 Goddamn, I love Austin, Texas. 1.00

00:53:37.000 So do I. Fuck, I love that place. 1.00

00:53:39.000 But we did this place, this Moody Theater, and before the theater, we worked out at the Honor Gym and then went to the Zero Gravity Float Spa that they have there. 0.99

00:53:48.000 So I had a perfect day.

00:53:49.000 Ooh.

00:53:50.000 But when we were there, John was doing his certification seminars.

00:53:53.000 He does these Onnit certification seminars and shows these potential trainers, people that want a career in the fitness industry.

00:54:00.000 Shows them all sorts of different ways to work out.

00:54:02.000 He's a scientist.

00:54:04.000 Oh, yeah.

00:54:04.000 I was telling you about...

00:54:06.000 This guy I work out with, Lou Parada, who is an old school bodybuilder, strong man.

00:54:11.000 He's 60, almost 59. How's he look?

00:54:14.000 He looks fantastic.

00:54:15.000 He's originally from North Italy, so he's got that Austrian, like he's just got huge hands and a big kind of strong jaw.

00:54:21.000 Still works out like Oh, yeah, he's but but when you say crazy like he's the guy I'll take you for 20 minutes and Work you out and target your muscles in a certain way and you're like this isn't doing I just feel like I could do more and then the next day your source shit like he just he's a scientist He knows he's got 160 clients and it's because he just knows what the hell he's doing and you're in and out in 20 25 minutes Well,

00:54:44.000 if you could still look good in your 60s. 0.61

00:54:46.000 Oh, he looks fantastic ripped. 1.00

00:54:48.000 What's his dick taste like? 1.00

00:54:49.000 I'm glad you asked I don't do that. 1.00

00:54:53.000 Fucking child I am. 0.99

00:54:54.000 I was like, I shouldn't have asked that. 0.99

00:54:56.000 You have to.

00:54:56.000 I'm like, I have to.

00:54:57.000 I always do.

00:54:59.000 That's all I do.

00:55:01.000 That's all I do. 1.00

00:55:02.000 I'm such an idiot. 1.00

00:55:04.000 I'm such an idiot. 1.00

00:55:05.000 Such a child. 1.00

00:55:07.000 So what does he look like in his 60s?

00:55:09.000 Pull a picture of this gentleman up.

00:55:10.000 He's 60. What's his name?

00:55:12.000 He's at P-Fit Gym on Lincoln, if you guys want to go.

00:55:14.000 I'm always impressed with dudes who are in their 60s that look great.

00:55:17.000 He's 59. Like Steve Maxwell, deep in his 60s.

00:55:21.000 Is he?

00:55:21.000 That dude's a stud.

00:55:23.000 It's an animal.

00:55:24.000 All he does, goes all over the world and trains people.

00:55:28.000 Wow.

00:55:29.000 Just little seminars.

00:55:30.000 So what's his philosophy?

00:55:32.000 He's a fascinating guy.

00:55:34.000 He has a lot of philosophies.

00:55:36.000 He's a very intelligent guy, and he's very well-read when it comes to ancient methods of fitness and exercise.

00:55:43.000 That guy's 60 years old?

00:55:45.000 Yep.

00:55:46.000 He looks great.

00:55:46.000 I know he does.

00:55:47.000 Lou Pirata!

00:55:48.000 That's amazing.

00:55:49.000 He looks better than Red Band.

00:55:51.000 Dude, I can't believe he's on that.

00:55:52.000 Yeah, he looks amazing, dude.

00:55:53.000 Yeah, his skin looks great.

00:55:54.000 Yep.

00:55:55.000 He eats a lot of fruits and vegetables, some meat.

00:55:59.000 He's working on that posture, though.

00:56:00.000 What's up with that neck forward thing that's got going on there?

00:56:02.000 Straighten up, fella.

00:56:03.000 He's been working out his whole life.

00:56:05.000 Straighten up. 1.00

00:56:05.000 And he knows more about shit. 1.00

00:56:06.000 He can do shit to you. 1.00

00:56:08.000 And by the way, that's exactly what he looks like right now. 1.00

00:56:11.000 And he can do shit to you that just he just targets those muscles. 0.97

00:56:14.000 So this is just he's giving people a stair workout. 0.99

00:56:17.000 All he's doing here is warming you up.

00:56:19.000 You run maybe 10 stairs just to warm up.

00:56:21.000 You're not gonna stretch beforehand.

00:56:22.000 He warms the muscles up and then you just start slowly lifting and then by the time 20 minutes is over you're begging for mercy.

00:56:29.000 Yeah, they say not to stretch now before lifting weights and that stretching actually can take away some of your performance.

00:56:35.000 Yeah.

00:56:36.000 The problem with that is, I wonder if that's the case with martial arts.

00:56:41.000 Because, I mean, I think there's a reason why people in ballet and dance and gymnastics stretch.

00:56:47.000 I don't know about gymnastics.

00:56:48.000 I might have made that up.

00:56:49.000 But certainly dance, they stretch before they work out.

00:56:54.000 They stretch before they practice.

00:56:56.000 Yes.

00:56:57.000 Because I think martial arts...

00:56:58.000 There's a certain amount of flexibility that's necessary to achieve that fluid motion.

00:57:04.000 If you're bound up and tense and tight, you're not going to have the same sort of dexterity.

00:57:09.000 You're not going to have the same ability to place your foot wherever you want it to.

00:57:13.000 There's going to be some resistance.

00:57:14.000 But that resistance might actually be okay if you're doing something like squatting or jumping.

00:57:20.000 You know what I mean?

00:57:20.000 I think there's a different need that the body has when it comes to...

00:57:24.000 I've always been real skeptical of people telling me not to stretch.

00:57:27.000 There's a way to stretch, I think, and I do agree.

00:57:30.000 I think it depends on the kind of movement you're doing and stuff.

00:57:33.000 But they say the first thing you want to do is warm the muscle up, but also overstretching.

00:57:38.000 Like a lot of yoga people develop arthritic conditions because the tendons are genetically, you know, you either have longer tendons or shorter tendons.

00:57:47.000 So in other words, like a hinge of a door.

00:57:48.000 Some people can only open their door this much, other people can only open their door this much.

00:57:51.000 You have very flexible, you're really flexible.

00:57:54.000 And so when people overstretch those tendons, what happens is if the tendon is shorter and you're trying to make it longer, what will happen is the joint will start to compromise and you'll pull more of the joint apart.

00:58:07.000 Therefore, you get water or air into that joint, which apparently is what creates an arthritic condition.

00:58:12.000 So when you're constantly expanding and not doing some contractual work, that's where you run the joint.

00:58:17.000 So it's like yoga people that are not lifting weights as well?

00:58:20.000 Is that what it is?

00:58:21.000 Yeah, if you're stretching too much.

00:58:22.000 And it does weaken the muscle.

00:58:25.000 When you're cold and you're stretching, and then you go and play soccer, a lot of girls, especially, were tearing their ACL. And then when they had them start changing the way they trained, more weightlifting, more warming the muscle up beforehand, 1.00

00:58:42.000 that's how they were avoiding more of those ACL tears.

00:58:45.000 That's fascinating.

00:58:46.000 It's interesting how they learn.

00:58:49.000 You do.

00:58:49.000 Thank you.

00:58:50.000 Keep going.

00:58:51.000 It's interesting how they learn, too. 0.99

00:58:53.000 It's like they almost have to watch people fuck up and go, hmm, what's he doing wrong? 0.99

00:58:57.000 Like, why is he getting injured? 0.99

00:58:59.000 That's kind of how I feel about everything in life.

00:59:01.000 Sure.

00:59:02.000 Of course.

00:59:02.000 Like the next time we go into a war, like I was talking about, I hope that we learn and we go, what's the history of the region?

00:59:09.000 I mean, you learn by mistakes.

00:59:10.000 You learn the hard way.

00:59:12.000 Well, you should listen to Dan Carlin's series on World War I. Have you heard it yet?

00:59:16.000 I haven't.

00:59:17.000 Remember when he was talking about the difference between the World War I and the previous wars?

00:59:23.000 They had all these ideas about war.

00:59:26.000 Chivalry, honor, standing up in the fire. 1.00

00:59:28.000 All that shit went away. 1.00

00:59:29.000 Because with a machine gun, you all die. 1.00

00:59:33.000 Yeah.

00:59:33.000 Well, not only that.

00:59:34.000 They started introducing things like gas.

00:59:35.000 Bombs and gas.

00:59:37.000 Yeah, Fritz Harbor.

00:59:38.000 Well, Fritz Haber was a fascinating character.

00:59:40.000 Yeah, the most fascinating.

00:59:42.000 Yeah, because he figured out a way to take nitrogen out of the air, create ammonia.

00:59:46.000 This is from Radiolab.

00:59:48.000 And that ammonia is what they think that half the population of the world today has Fritz Haber nitrogen in their bloodstream.

00:59:57.000 The reason we can feed 7 billion people and soon 10 billion is primarily because the process Fritz Haber invented, which is getting nitrogen out of the air and into the soil, which is how you create fertilizer.

01:00:08.000 Problem is, it's also how you create explosives and poison gas.

01:00:14.000 Well, he was the first one to figure that out, how to use poison gas on troops.

01:00:18.000 Chlorine gas.

01:00:19.000 So while he was being awarded a Nobel Prize of Science for creating the Haber Method, he was also being wanted for war crimes by the United States by gassing people. 0.52

01:00:31.000 And the way they died, apparently, if you listen to the Radiolab podcast, they drowned in their own phlegm.

01:00:36.000 Well, how about what they do, how they end it, which is he created an insecticide called Zyklon A, which is an insecticide, and the reason it has Zyklon A is because it has a certain smell to it.

01:00:49.000 You put a scent in it so you know when it's in the air to avoid that area, the way they do with gasoline.

01:00:55.000 Gasoline doesn't have that scent.

01:00:57.000 They put that scent in there.

01:00:59.000 That's an artificial scent, so you know if there's a gas leak.

01:01:02.000 And the same as Zyklon A. And when the Nazis were figuring out what to do with their quote-unquote Jewish problem, and they talked about the final solution, they said, let's use this Zyklon A and take the scent out. 0.75

01:01:16.000 It'll be Zyklon B. And the irony is Fritz Haber, who was a secular Jew, who was a patriot, a German patriot, who figured out a way to feed half the world, His technology ended up killing his extended family and his friends. 0.68

01:01:33.000 It's kind of crazy, man.

01:01:34.000 Yeah, he actually wound up leaving Germany and he was ostracized by the rest of the world.

01:01:39.000 It's a fascinating podcast.

01:01:40.000 It's called The Bad Podcast.

01:01:43.000 It's one of the Radiolab ones that is amazing.

01:01:47.000 There's a great one they got out now about elements, about this woman who was going crazy, and lithium was the only thing that, she's bipolar. 0.96

01:01:55.000 Lithium brings her way back to normal.

01:01:57.000 Well, lithium is just an element.

01:01:59.000 It's a salt, apparently.

01:02:00.000 I didn't know that.

01:02:01.000 I thought lithium was some sort of chemical.

01:02:03.000 I need to listen to that.

01:02:03.000 You need to listen to it.

01:02:04.000 Did you listen to CRISPR? But this lithium thing that she's taking is killing her. 1.00

01:02:10.000 It's killing her.

01:02:10.000 It's causing her kidneys to fail.

01:02:12.000 So she has to get off the lithium.

01:02:13.000 And so they're talking to her while this is going on.

01:02:15.000 In the podcast, she's saying, like, this is so complicated for me because there's one thing that's killing me, but it's also allowing me to be me.

01:02:22.000 Really, really fascinating. 0.99

01:02:23.000 Goddamn. 0.98

01:02:25.000 Yeah, CRISPR, we've talked about it a few times on this podcast, the ability to manipulate genes. 0.98

01:02:29.000 And this is the beginning.

01:02:31.000 CRISPR, if you've never heard that one, that's another great one. 1.00

01:02:34.000 Radiolab is the shit. 1.00

01:02:35.000 It's a fucking amazing podcast. 1.00

01:02:36.000 It really is. 0.99

01:02:37.000 So interesting, you know?

01:02:38.000 So many fascinating, fascinating subjects they cover.

01:02:41.000 What would you do if they could manipulate your genes?

01:02:43.000 What do you want different?

01:02:44.000 It's going to be a real problem when people do do it, because there's going to be no regular people left.

01:02:51.000 I think we're looking at life now as, if you go back to the early forms of life that were on this planet, just single-celled organisms turned into multi-celled organisms.

01:03:01.000 They evolved from random mutations and natural selection, all the different various factors that cause a person to come out of the You know, primordial slime that we originated from.

01:03:13.000 If you look at what we are now, we look at all that, this is like how it progresses, you know?

01:03:17.000 This is how a dinosaur turns into a bird, and this is, oh, we can see these are the early primates.

01:03:22.000 You're speaking about evolution.

01:03:23.000 You know, most of the Republican candidates don't want to talk about that.

01:03:26.000 This is crazy.

01:03:27.000 If you look at all that stuff, we look at this timeline.

01:03:30.000 It's this long, slow, crazy timeline.

01:03:33.000 It's really difficult to trace for the average human mind.

01:03:38.000 You know, you look at a primate and you look at a human.

01:03:41.000 You go, well, human used to be something like that a long time ago.

01:03:45.000 What? 1.00

01:03:45.000 Fuck. 1.00

01:03:46.000 And you know, we see pictures of cave people, we kind of get it, but that's 60,000 years ago. 1.00

01:03:50.000 We say, well, 100,000 years ago, a million years ago, whatever the fuck it was. 0.94

01:03:54.000 It seems so long. 0.94

01:03:55.000 It's hard.

01:03:56.000 It doesn't really register.

01:03:57.000 It's like when someone says a trillion dollars, like, um, okay.

01:04:00.000 A trillion years.

01:04:01.000 I don't get it.

01:04:02.000 You know?

01:04:04.000 It's going to happen like that.

01:04:07.000 We're going to control our own evolution.

01:04:09.000 Yes, and I think it's only one part of the bigger problem.

01:04:13.000 I think our ability to control our own bodies is just a part of the evolution of technology.

01:04:20.000 And the evolution of technology that allows us to do that is also going to create artificial life, which is many, many more times complicated.

01:04:27.000 Well, it takes the element of chance out of the entire equation.

01:04:30.000 Yeah.

01:04:31.000 So when we're able to control exactly how we look and what we develop into and what we are resistant to, it's kind of like what we're doing with crops.

01:04:41.000 And I think, I also, I feel like we are going to be able to take this machine, which is what we are, which is kind of a fascinating and incredibly complex machine, but technology is going to render this machine...

01:04:57.000 Kind of obsolete, I feel like.

01:04:59.000 I feel like ultimately we're gonna trade in this machine for something that works a lot more efficiently and lives longer and all that stuff.

01:05:09.000 If you could do it, why not?

01:05:11.000 Yeah, but that's even assuming that what we are is gonna maintain.

01:05:16.000 I think we are a technological caterpillar.

01:05:19.000 That's what I think.

01:05:20.000 I think we're a caterpillar that becomes a butterfly.

01:05:23.000 And right now we're in the middle of making a cocoon.

01:05:25.000 That's really interesting.

01:05:26.000 I just don't think this is a good design.

01:05:28.000 You mean mentally?

01:05:29.000 I think life.

01:05:30.000 Yeah.

01:05:31.000 I think if we create artificial life, we create some sort of an artificial thing that somehow or another profits on its staying alive.

01:05:38.000 Like, there's a reason why we want to stay alive.

01:05:39.000 We want to procreate, we want to keep the human race alive, and we want to react to all of our instincts, all of our natural instincts and the natural reward systems that have been put in place over the eons to make sure that we keep breeding and keep staying alive.

01:05:53.000 That's where you reach.

01:05:53.000 That's where your ego comes from.

01:05:54.000 That's where lust comes from and greed and jealousy. 0.99

01:05:57.000 All these things are motivating factors for you to improve on your condition. 1.00

01:06:03.000 And keep fucking and keep making more babies. 1.00

01:06:06.000 Why are they covering thy neighbor's wife? 1.00

01:06:08.000 Why? 1.00

01:06:08.000 Because they want to fuck that bitch and shoot some loads into her and make a baby with her. 1.00

01:06:12.000 Gotta make babies! 1.00

01:06:12.000 You gotta keep going! 1.00

01:06:13.000 I think that's a really shitty design and I think it ultimately its main goal is to for it for the biological entity to create a more sophisticated and Much more efficient entity and that's what it's going to do There's a this is the caterpillar and this caterpillar is going to become some indescribable butterfly some butterfly that can manipulate its environment like never before some butterfly that literally creates worlds and If you extrapolate that,

01:06:43.000 and if you then say, look, all my biological needs are taken care of, so I don't have to worry about disease, I don't have to worry about food, and I'm optimal.

01:06:54.000 Am I optimal?

01:06:56.000 My machine can adapt, and it probably won't die.

01:06:59.000 You're still left with something that's very interesting to me, which is now Now if you've taken out the equation, that sort of rudimentary need to procreate, that rudimentary need to replicate yourself, that rudimentary need to sort of, or rudimentary might be the wrong word, but the need to be immortal,

01:07:16.000 to keep your genes through whatever it is going.

01:07:20.000 Then you're kind of left with...

01:07:22.000 Why?

01:07:23.000 Yourself, and why?

01:07:24.000 Right.

01:07:25.000 You know?

01:07:25.000 Like, what am I doing here?

01:07:26.000 Pleasure.

01:07:27.000 Well, no, pleasure's different.

01:07:29.000 I think pleasure...

01:07:30.000 Positive experiences, right?

01:07:32.000 Fun, excitement, pleasure...

01:07:34.000 To what end, though?

01:07:35.000 To get to know yourself better?

01:07:36.000 What are those things?

01:07:37.000 The question is, what are those things?

01:07:38.000 What is positive?

01:07:39.000 What is love?

01:07:40.000 What is happiness?

01:07:42.000 What is friendship?

01:07:43.000 What is achievement?

01:07:44.000 All those things are the rewards.

01:07:46.000 All those things are rewards for behavior that's ultimately going to lead to procreation.

01:07:51.000 Bonding leads to community.

01:07:53.000 Community leads to safety.

01:07:54.000 Safety leads to your children surviving.

01:07:56.000 All those things are connected.

01:07:58.000 Procreation, acquiring of things, becoming more valuable as a member of your community and more desirable as a possible breeding candidate.

01:08:10.000 All those things, they all contribute ultimately to procreation.

01:08:15.000 That's a big part of what Everything that we do is.

01:08:19.000 But then there's another side, which is play you could define as that what you do for the sake of doing, right?

01:08:24.000 And that's probably when you're most yourself.

01:08:27.000 So if play is the case, then it seems like we were just talking about this, like people say, I don't know what to do with my life.

01:08:32.000 And I always say to younger people, I'm like, look, man, I don't know what to do with your life either, but I do know that it's really fun to get good at a language.

01:08:39.000 Like watching you play pool, that's a language.

01:08:41.000 That's something you've come from.

01:08:43.000 Very close to being really, really good at.

01:08:46.000 And you have a deep understanding of it.

01:08:48.000 You gain a deep understanding, this great pleasure in being fluent in a language like, say, pool, or jujitsu, or boxing, or even another language, or in an instrument like guitar.

01:08:59.000 I think you develop an understanding, and sometimes that you can't necessarily put into words.

01:09:05.000 It's something you have to experience. 0.66

01:09:07.000 But God damn it, is it satisfying. 0.87

01:09:09.000 And it's satisfying in and of itself. 0.96

01:09:12.000 Okay, but why?

01:09:13.000 Well, okay, so here's my answer.

01:09:16.000 I think, well, I don't have the answer, but I think it may lie in the area of understanding and coming closer to something maybe people call consciousness.

01:09:29.000 Coming closer to something that's bigger than yourself.

01:09:34.000 Communion with something that is without measure, but that you know is there.

01:09:41.000 Don't you think, though, also, that if you don't look at it like in some sort of spiritual way, but look at in terms of just biology and natural reward systems that are put into place by success, success leading to procreation, people that are really good at things, you get good at things that are difficult to solve,

01:09:58.000 like solving puzzles is integral to survival.

01:10:02.000 It's integral to innovation, leads to more efficiency, more efficiency leads to more food, more food leads to people staying alive.

01:10:09.000 The better you get at something, the more you're rewarded with those positive feelings, those natural reward systems that are put in place to make sure that people figure out their fucking part on this world, figure out their way through this life, until they can invent artificial life.

01:10:27.000 Get them hooked on material possessions. 0.99

01:10:30.000 Get them hooked on this idea of getting the newest, greatest, latest shit. 0.99

01:10:35.000 Get them hooked on technology. 0.98

01:10:36.000 You need a watch that you can swipe and you need all these different new crazy things.

01:10:40.000 And the more these things get fueled, the more the technology grows.

01:10:45.000 The more the technology grows, the more the inevitability of an artificial life form exists.

01:10:53.000 Okay, but here's what...

01:10:55.000 I'm so blown away right now.

01:10:57.000 Me too, man.

01:10:58.000 But here, take your pants off for a second. 1.00

01:11:01.000 I came already.

01:11:02.000 Oh, boy. 1.00

01:11:02.000 Shit. 1.00

01:11:03.000 Here's where... 1.00

01:11:04.000 Trip, trip.

01:11:04.000 Sorry.

01:11:05.000 I'm 48, trip.

01:11:06.000 No shots.

01:11:08.000 Here's what I think, though.

01:11:13.000 When you talk about technology, most of us are talking about a tool you can use for the here and now.

01:11:17.000 And that technology allows you to speak to people more clearly and faster and get places faster and all that stuff.

01:11:25.000 They're all tools. 0.91

01:11:26.000 But then there's another side to fucking reality that I'm fascinated with. 0.97

01:11:30.000 And I don't know why it's there. 0.97

01:11:32.000 But there's something that goes beyond experience.

01:11:35.000 There's a reality that is beyond experience.

01:11:38.000 And you know what I mean by that?

01:11:39.000 I'll tell you.

01:11:40.000 The number infinity...

01:11:42.000 is not something we'll ever see, but it's something we imagine and something we use in mathematics.

01:11:49.000 Negative numbers, negative integers and things, are mathematical constructs that you can't actually see and don't have material measurement necessarily, but they are theoretical and we use them and benefit from it.

01:12:04.000 Here's another great example.

01:12:06.000 The mathematician in 1860 Who spends his whole life thinking of some weird mathematical equation.

01:12:13.000 It's got no bearing on the material world whatsoever.

01:12:16.000 Until 150 years later. 0.71

01:12:18.000 And now we're using it to measure the difference between fucking, you know, the crater on Mars and how it relates to things like that. 0.89

01:12:27.000 And I just think that sometimes whatever human beings have an imagination, it's put there. 0.96

01:12:32.000 The imagination is put there somewhere.

01:12:34.000 And I'm not getting into this mystical stuff.

01:12:36.000 I'm just saying I am curious to know why we have what separates us from animals is potential.

01:12:44.000 Is anything we can imagine seems to be within our reach in terms of reality.

01:12:53.000 Eventually.

01:12:54.000 Yes, and I think that nostalgia, that need to go physically further than we've ever gone before, and mentally further than we've ever gone before, there's no limit to human potential.

01:13:07.000 There seems to be zero limit to human potential, to the point where we will render ourselves, our very biology, and even our mental paradigms obsolete, where we will achieve immortality.

01:13:20.000 But wait a minute, will we be we then?

01:13:23.000 Exactly.

01:13:23.000 But we won't.

01:13:24.000 We won't be.

01:13:24.000 We'll be something better.

01:13:25.000 That's what I mean.

01:13:26.000 We're going to evolve out of ourselves.

01:13:28.000 So you're essentially agreeing with me. 0.99

01:13:29.000 I fucking am. 0.99

01:13:31.000 We're going to create an artificial life form. 0.99

01:13:33.000 Well, that artificial life form might be the butterfly, right?

01:13:35.000 Yes.

01:13:35.000 If we need, absolutely, to constantly innovate, and we do.

01:13:39.000 No one is ever going to look at a computer and say, we're done.

01:13:41.000 No one's going to look at an iPhone and say, there's no need for the 6s.

01:13:44.000 The 6 is perfect.

01:13:46.000 Let's stop there.

01:13:47.000 Who needs 12 megapixels?

01:13:48.000 I got eight. 0.99

01:13:48.000 I'm happy as fuck. 0.99

01:13:49.000 I take great Instagram pictures. 0.99

01:13:51.000 No.

01:13:52.000 No one's going to be happy.

01:13:53.000 We're going to get bored.

01:13:53.000 And it's an inexorable part of being a human.

01:13:57.000 There's this weird thing you can't take out of us where we look with awe at the guy who decides to live in a log house and go fishing every day.

01:14:04.000 This guy lives off the land.

01:14:06.000 What?

01:14:06.000 Like, they're so freaky that we have TV shows dedicated to them.

01:14:10.000 Yes.

01:14:10.000 Like, let's watch these people in Alaska.

01:14:12.000 Well, they're walking anachronisms.

01:14:13.000 Those are like throwbacks, right?

01:14:15.000 I mean, that's what's interesting is that they're bucking the grid and saying, I can still do it the way we did 150 years ago.

01:14:22.000 There's that, and there's also the fact that they're out there braving the wild.

01:14:25.000 They're braving the atmosphere.

01:14:27.000 They're braving the harsh parts of the world that we don't want to visit.

01:14:30.000 Like, that's the whole thing about Life Below Zero, that show that I love.

01:14:33.000 Yeah.

01:14:34.000 It's 200 fucking miles above the Arctic Circle is where these people live, some of them. 1.00

01:14:40.000 You know, I mean, fuck, man. 0.99

01:14:42.000 Sue Akin's a chick that I had on the show. 1.00

01:14:43.000 She's amazing.

01:14:45.000 If you've never listened to that podcast, it's one of the best ones I ever did.

01:14:48.000 Really?

01:14:49.000 Oh, my God.

01:14:50.000 She's a fascinating woman, man. 1.00

01:14:51.000 She's in her 50s, lives up in Alaska by herself in this fucking... 1.00

01:14:56.000 You can't even have buildings up there because it's on this land that has to have temporary structures because of whatever goofy fucking law there's in place. 0.99

01:15:05.000 So she has tents. 1.00

01:15:06.000 They're these giant tents with hoop wires and very thick canvas. 1.00

01:15:11.000 But they're fucking tents, man. 0.99

01:15:13.000 And she's out there with grizzly bears and wolves. 1.00

01:15:15.000 And everywhere she goes, she's strapped.

01:15:17.000 She got attacked by a bear. 1.00

01:15:19.000 God damn it. 1.00

01:15:20.000 Fucking bit her head, broke her hip, fucked her up. 1.00

01:15:23.000 God damn it. 1.00

01:15:23.000 She went to the hospital. 1.00

01:15:25.000 I mean, she was fucking on her back for like seven days before they found her. 1.00

01:15:29.000 She went to the hospital, got fixed up, went back, shot the fucking bear and ate it. 1.00

01:15:35.000 She's the most gangster bitch on the planet. 1.00

01:15:38.000 She's like right up there with Ronda Rousey. 1.00

01:15:40.000 She's so gangster. 0.92

01:15:41.000 Just Ronda if she's 50. This chick is hard fucking core. 1.00

01:15:46.000 Fascinating though. 0.99

01:15:47.000 Like that this woman chooses, that's where she's getting her jollies. 1.00

01:15:50.000 There's her.

01:15:51.000 That's her. 0.88

01:15:51.000 I love that lady. 0.88

01:15:52.000 That's her house, man. 1.00

01:15:54.000 That's her fucking house. 1.00

01:15:55.000 That's where she lives. 1.00

01:15:56.000 See, it's got like a wooden side.

01:15:57.000 The top of that is all cloth.

01:15:58.000 It's a tent.

01:15:59.000 She lives up there alone.

01:16:00.000 Yes!

01:16:01.000 Doesn't she get lonely?

01:16:01.000 But she occasionally has visitors.

01:16:03.000 No, she travels.

01:16:04.000 She has children and grandchildren. 1.00

01:16:06.000 She does whatever the fuck she wants. 0.99

01:16:07.000 But that's what those things look like. 0.98

01:16:09.000 They're temporary structures.

01:16:11.000 She gets her gas flowing in on these gigantic planes. 0.99

01:16:15.000 And she fills planes up. 0.98

01:16:16.000 She's like a waypoint.

01:16:18.000 She owns like a filling station up there. 1.00

01:16:19.000 And that's how she makes her living. 1.00

01:16:21.000 And she also... 1.00

01:16:22.000 People can come stay in...

01:16:24.000 Like she has structures up there. 0.99

01:16:25.000 They can come stay in caribou hunt and do a bunch of different things.

01:16:28.000 And she'll... 0.98

01:16:28.000 Take people on guided tours of the area now. 0.98

01:16:31.000 It's especially...

01:16:32.000 Look at that.

01:16:33.000 There's the place where she lives. 0.99

01:16:34.000 What's that?

01:16:35.000 It's amazing.

01:16:36.000 Oh, it's so amazing.

01:16:37.000 She's incredible.

01:16:38.000 But she's not just dealing with...

01:16:42.000 The environment.

01:16:44.000 She's dealing with the animals. 0.98

01:16:45.000 She's dealing with mortality.

01:16:47.000 And, you know, she lives this assistance lifestyle up there. 1.00

01:16:50.000 Most of what she gets, either she gets flown in or she shoots it and eats it.

01:16:55.000 Scroll back up to the top.

01:16:56.000 Who are those people there?

01:16:57.000 She loves it, too, huh?

01:16:59.000 Oh, yeah.

01:16:59.000 See, she provides, like, this says hunting and fishing.

01:17:02.000 Is that elk?

01:17:02.000 No, those are caribou.

01:17:04.000 Those are caribou antlers.

01:17:05.000 They have these crazy antlers. 0.99

01:17:06.000 Those are actually reindeer.

01:17:08.000 I mean, that's what a reindeer is.

01:17:09.000 It's a relative of the reindeer.

01:17:12.000 Pretty similar.

01:17:13.000 So Kavik, where she's at, she has these hunting camps that come up there because... 0.62

01:17:18.000 These people, see, you have self-guided camps.

01:17:22.000 The caribou are up there, and they go by every year.

01:17:26.000 There's like a time when they go up there. 0.99

01:17:28.000 It's like August or some shit. 0.87

01:17:29.000 And during that time, that's when they fly people up there and they go caribou hunting. 0.97

01:17:34.000 But they'll walk by in these massive herds, hundreds and hundreds of caribou sometimes.

01:17:40.000 And you just lay down, you pick one, and you shoot it.

01:17:43.000 And you eat it, and you get hundreds of pounds of the most delicious meat you'll ever eat in your life.

01:17:49.000 That's a moose, actually.

01:17:51.000 Yeah, that's a different animal.

01:17:52.000 But that's a moose, too.

01:17:54.000 But the other one were caribou, and they're unbelievably delicious, too.

01:18:00.000 So are moose, man.

01:18:01.000 I had some moose sirloin the other day that I cooked from last year, when I shot that moose last year.

01:18:06.000 I cooked it the other day.

01:18:07.000 It's not a place for the vegan.

01:18:09.000 No, the meat is so good.

01:18:11.000 If you ate it at a restaurant, it'd be like your favorite meat ever.

01:18:14.000 But you don't sell moose commercially.

01:18:17.000 I still haven't gotten any from you.

01:18:19.000 Dude, come over, man!

01:18:20.000 When are you coming over?

01:18:21.000 Come over, let's cook. 0.99

01:18:21.000 Maybe I'll do it today. 0.99

01:18:23.000 After we cry-o.

01:18:24.000 Let's do it.

01:18:25.000 Come on over, I'll cook for you. 0.87

01:18:26.000 I asked Tim Kennedy, I was watching, talking to him as he was cryotherapy-ing.

01:18:29.000 I said, do you shiver?

01:18:31.000 And he said, I do well with the cold. 1.00

01:18:34.000 You're such a fucking stud. 1.00

01:18:36.000 You get very excited by him. 1.00

01:18:38.000 Yes, he's my boyfriend.

01:18:39.000 Anthony Bourdain's yours and Tim Kennedy's mine.

01:18:42.000 I fantasized about just being buddies.

01:18:44.000 What would you guys do together most of the time?

01:18:46.000 Hunt wild boar on horseback with spears, duh.

01:18:49.000 That sounds like an ineffective way of doing it.

01:18:51.000 Shoot guns and then cuddle and watch action films. 0.99

01:18:55.000 Why don't you just shoot the boar with guns if you have guns? 0.98

01:18:57.000 Because spears are more macho and you gotta have good throwing motion. 0.99

01:19:03.000 Yeah.

01:19:04.000 I thought that about bow hunting.

01:19:07.000 Why bow hunt?

01:19:08.000 Why do you have to bow hunt?

01:19:09.000 Because it's more of a challenge, I guess.

01:19:10.000 But the idea of challenge is kind of dangerous if you're hunting.

01:19:13.000 I guess.

01:19:14.000 And also for the animal.

01:19:16.000 I've been watching a lot of hunting shows where they show wounded animals with bow hunting.

01:19:21.000 Do you think once the mystery of something goes away, you want to move on?

01:19:26.000 What is it about archery?

01:19:28.000 Oh, archery is a great discipline.

01:19:30.000 I love archery as a discipline.

01:19:32.000 Yeah.

01:19:32.000 It's a fun thing to do.

01:19:34.000 Like, just shooting targets.

01:19:35.000 Come on over to the house, man. 0.99

01:19:36.000 We'll fucking shoot some targets today. 0.99

01:19:37.000 I'll have to get one of my little girl bows out for you to use, but I've got a few of those. 0.99

01:19:40.000 I don't need the 60 pound and the 90 is too hard for me.

01:19:42.000 I don't use the 90 anymore.

01:19:43.000 I use the 70. I think I could pull back a 70, couldn't I? You might struggle.

01:19:48.000 You had a hard time with the 80 last time.

01:19:49.000 Yeah.

01:19:51.000 But it's hard, man.

01:19:53.000 It's also something you shouldn't start out with.

01:19:55.000 Just start out with like a 40 or 50. Just to get used to that.

01:19:58.000 Yeah, just get used to the motion and also get used to the fundamentals of archery.

01:20:02.000 You don't want to be struggling with the bow while you're learning how to do it.

01:20:05.000 I take creatine now.

01:20:06.000 Do you?

01:20:07.000 I do.

01:20:07.000 Makes you bigger?

01:20:08.000 Makes your face fat. 0.78

01:20:09.000 I'm a little thicker.

01:20:10.000 I'm carrying water weight, you guys.

01:20:12.000 Makes your face buffy. 0.68

01:20:13.000 I look like I'm on my period.

01:20:14.000 But it's just a fun thing to do, like lining up the target, keeping everything straight.

01:20:20.000 And there's something that when you're doing something that's really difficult, like it's hard to get the arrow to go where you want it to go.

01:20:27.000 It takes a lot of practice.

01:20:28.000 I shoot about 100 arrows a day.

01:20:30.000 It's a lot.

01:20:30.000 Every day.

01:20:31.000 I have archery targets all over my yard.

01:20:35.000 Five of them?

01:20:36.000 Six of them?

01:20:37.000 I just ordered a giant elk. 0.99

01:20:39.000 It hasn't gotten here yet, but it's a fucking huge rubber elk. 0.97

01:20:42.000 Sounds like your priorities are where they should be. 0.97

01:20:44.000 For me, they are.

01:20:45.000 What do I want to do?

01:20:47.000 Who's this giant rubber elk for?

01:20:49.000 It's Joe Rogan.

01:20:50.000 Oh, yeah.

01:20:51.000 He's got a rubber pig as well.

01:20:52.000 They're very popular.

01:20:53.000 A lot of people have them.

01:20:54.000 A giant rubber elk?

01:20:56.000 That hunt with bow hunting, with elk, because you want to make sure that you're going to hit that spot.

01:21:00.000 Looking at an animal is different than looking at a target.

01:21:04.000 A lot of what archery is, is repetition.

01:21:08.000 Repetition and muscle memory, and it's got to be ingrained in your mind how you line a shot up and what are the movements when you release that arrow.

01:21:18.000 See, I love all that stuff.

01:21:19.000 Yeah, it's great.

01:21:20.000 I just like, that's why, like, you know, boxing.

01:21:23.000 I'm, like, working out with someone, like, at Box and Burn, this guy, Chris Van Erden, who's fighting for the IBO title.

01:21:31.000 He's defending his international title.

01:21:33.000 On Spike TV, what is it?

01:21:35.000 Anyway.

01:21:36.000 And he...

01:21:37.000 Like, just learning how, like, just, like, the intricacies of boxing.

01:21:41.000 I know I'm never gonna master it or get really good at it, but I just like reaching.

01:21:45.000 Right.

01:21:45.000 I like just reaching.

01:21:46.000 If you think about it, 48 years old, it's silver.

01:21:49.000 What's gonna happen?

01:21:49.000 I'm gonna be thrown into, when the Mongols come, they're gonna throw me into a pit.

01:21:53.000 Haha, you have to box that guy!

01:21:54.000 Let's bet on him! 1.00

01:21:55.000 And all of a sudden I'm gonna surprise everybody with my fucking, my jab, bop, bop, bop. 0.99

01:21:59.000 You'd be like Brad Pitt in that movie Snatch. 0.99

01:22:01.000 That's all I want to be.

01:22:01.000 You'd be a ringer.

01:22:02.000 I just want to be a gypsy fighter with that body. 1.00

01:22:04.000 Do you want to talk like that, too?

01:22:10.000 Yeah, man, getting good at things is fun.

01:22:16.000 But the ultimate question, like we were talking about before, is why is it fun?

01:22:20.000 What is it about it?

01:22:21.000 I don't know, but I just know that for me to stay happy, and this is my own craziness, I need to constantly be engaged in things that challenge me.

01:22:30.000 That's it.

01:22:31.000 I've tried a bunch of other ways to be happy.

01:22:33.000 I can't just chill out and relax all the time.

01:22:35.000 It's just not in me.

01:22:37.000 I'm not me neither.

01:22:37.000 I'm the same way.

01:22:38.000 But I like to relax.

01:22:39.000 I do love relaxation, but I have to feel like I've earned it.

01:22:43.000 I don't like relax.

01:22:45.000 Like regular laziness, like waking, baking, and getting up, that leaves me with this hollow anxiety.

01:22:51.000 Me too.

01:22:51.000 Like I can't do that.

01:22:53.000 I've tried it.

01:22:53.000 I've tried to just be lazy.

01:22:55.000 It fucks with my head too much. 0.99

01:22:56.000 I agree. 0.97

01:22:57.000 I can only appreciate watching television or going to the movies if I've done my work.

01:23:01.000 If I haven't done my work, I don't, you know, and there's happiness in achievement, too. 0.99

01:23:06.000 There's happiness in getting shit done. 0.78

01:23:08.000 Yeah, but that also goes back to what we were talking about where, like, I'm trying to work on this new hour now. 0.97

01:23:13.000 Now I shot my one hour, I'm editing it, I'm throwing all that away, and you've got to start with new stuff.

01:23:18.000 What drives me, actually, I swear to God, is not laughs.

01:23:22.000 I've had enough laughs.

01:23:23.000 You know, you can get inoculated to that.

01:23:25.000 It's a beautiful thing to get a lot of laughs, but what was more important is I want to see what else I can come up with.

01:23:30.000 I want to see if I can tap into my real potential and come up with something even better.

01:23:34.000 Of course.

01:23:35.000 That challenge is, again, going, what is my potential?

01:23:38.000 Like, what do I really have in me?

01:23:40.000 And how much time, if I spend like eight hours a day thinking about it as opposed to two hours a day, That's what nags at me.

01:23:45.000 It's also you realize as, you know, an artist man.

01:23:49.000 As an artist, you're constantly growing.

01:23:53.000 And you're constantly getting...

01:23:54.000 That's one of the number one problems with older comedians that have the act from 20 years ago.

01:23:59.000 We've seen those guys before.

01:24:01.000 Time passes you by.

01:24:03.000 Comedy is like a sandcastle. 1.00

01:24:05.000 You build it, I mean, people can look at the photos of it from the past, but this shit's gone. 1.00

01:24:12.000 It's gone. 0.99

01:24:12.000 And once it's gone, it's gone. 0.99

01:24:14.000 If Lenny Bruce came back from the dead today and went up Saturday night at the Comedy Store, he'd eat a plate of dicks. 0.99

01:24:19.000 Yeah, he'd die. 0.99

01:24:20.000 He would, because the culture has changed.

01:24:23.000 If you go and listen to his, and I'm not a hater at all, I mean, I think Lenny Bruce's The most important figure in all of stand-up.

01:24:32.000 He's the original.

01:24:33.000 He's the godfather.

01:24:33.000 You go over to my house, I have Lenny Bruce posters.

01:24:36.000 I have a concert poster from the Fillmore.

01:24:38.000 I have one of his concert movies that's framed in a poster.

01:24:43.000 To me, he's like, that was the original. 0.97

01:24:46.000 He fucking took a lot of crazy chances and got arrested for it and really ultimately went crazy. 0.99

01:24:51.000 The last parts of his life were him going to court Doing heroin, died on his fucking bathroom floor doing heroin. 1.00

01:24:59.000 He was going to court all the time, and he would do shows where he was just completely gone. 0.99

01:25:03.000 He would just read legal transcripts to the audience.

01:25:07.000 There's video of it.

01:25:08.000 You can watch it.

01:25:09.000 I bought a bunch of these videos and watched them with VHS. I was like, wow, this guy just went crazy.

01:25:14.000 At the end, he was just going through, so Dick, the judge says, and he's reading these transcripts with no comedy.

01:25:21.000 There was nothing funny about it.

01:25:23.000 He just lost all of his point and was obsessed with this.

01:25:27.000 So he laid the foundation.

01:25:29.000 He laid the groundwork for guys like you and me and everybody else.

01:25:34.000 Everybody else that does stand up.

01:25:35.000 But it wouldn't work today if you had the same act.

01:25:38.000 If he was alive today, he'd figure it out.

01:25:41.000 He'd figure it out.

01:25:41.000 He's a comic.

01:25:42.000 He'd figure it out.

01:25:43.000 But he'd have to grow.

01:25:45.000 Everyone has to grow.

01:25:47.000 Your comedy grows and it changes as the culture changes.

01:25:50.000 If you go back to Eddie Murphy Raw... 1.00

01:25:53.000 There's some fucking terrible homophobic shit in Eddie Murphy Rock. 1.00

01:25:56.000 I was there. 1.00

01:25:57.000 I went to the actual concert.

01:25:59.000 But did you think it was terrible and homophobic at the time?

01:26:02.000 Not then.

01:26:02.000 No, it was okay.

01:26:03.000 It was acceptable.

01:26:05.000 It's weird how it goes.

01:26:05.000 And that was when I wasn't...

01:26:07.000 I've never been...

01:26:07.000 I've always been sensitive to people's feelings.

01:26:10.000 I never wanted to gang up on somebody who was gay.

01:26:12.000 But I just didn't think of it as something that was bad.

01:26:15.000 Oh, speaking of which, I forgot to bring this up.

01:26:19.000 Jamie, go to my Twitter page, and there's a tweet that I posted today about this woman from Kentucky that is, the Kentucky clerk denies marriage license under God's authority. 0.99

01:26:30.000 There's a video of these guys.

01:26:32.000 Did you see the video?

01:26:33.000 This is a new one.

01:26:34.000 This is from today.

01:26:35.000 This is a new person.

01:26:37.000 There was the other person.

01:26:38.000 This is a new person.

01:26:40.000 This woman is talking to these gay guys that want to get married, and she won't let them. 1.00

01:26:45.000 And they're saying, under whose authority? 0.92

01:26:47.000 The video would drive you crazy.

01:26:48.000 Put those on, put those on, put those on.

01:26:52.000 Check this out.

01:26:53.000 Go full screen, because this is awesome.

01:26:57.000 The Supreme Court denies your say.

01:26:59.000 We are not issuing marriage licenses today.

01:27:01.000 Based on what?

01:27:02.000 Why are you not issuing marriage licenses today?

01:27:05.000 Because I'm not.

01:27:07.000 Under whose authority are you not issuing God's authority?

01:27:10.000 Did God tell you to do this?

01:27:13.000 Did God tell you to treat us?

01:27:14.000 I've asked you all to leave.

01:27:17.000 You can call the police if you want us to leave.

01:27:21.000 You can call the police.

01:27:24.000 It's awesome.

01:27:25.000 Yeah.

01:27:25.000 It's what makes our country modern.

01:27:27.000 Well, this is a shift in culture.

01:27:29.000 I mean, this is like that woman that's saying that is crazy.

01:27:34.000 She's locked in an ideology, and her very job relies on the government. 1.00

01:27:41.000 I mean, that's what the government is telling her.

01:27:43.000 I mean, she's a government employee. 0.98

01:27:44.000 The government is telling her.

01:27:47.000 I mean, the Supreme Court has made a decision, you have to allow these people to get married. 0.84

01:27:51.000 And she's like, nope.

01:27:52.000 I believe in God first.

01:27:54.000 Well, I think, though, that we also have to recognize, I don't agree with her, because I'm not a religious guy, but it is a matter of faith for her.

01:28:05.000 And if she's going to be a government employee, though, she's got to uphold the law of the land.

01:28:08.000 We live in a secular society, which is the separation of church and state.

01:28:12.000 Do we really?

01:28:12.000 What about one nation under God?

01:28:14.000 That's the same state that wanted to teach...

01:28:16.000 It's the same state that wanted to teach...

01:28:18.000 The school board wanted to teach creative design instead of evolution.

01:28:22.000 Isn't that the same state where they get the devil statue now?

01:28:24.000 They have to have a devil statue?

01:28:26.000 Which state has to have a devil statue?

01:28:28.000 Because the Satanists won the religious right to put a devil statue or the Jesus statue.

01:28:32.000 They have equal representation.

01:28:34.000 Pagans, you mean?

01:28:34.000 No, no, no.

01:28:35.000 No, Satanists.

01:28:36.000 Satanists.

01:28:36.000 Yeah, no, Satanists.

01:28:37.000 That's hilarious.

01:28:38.000 Satanists statue. 1.00

01:28:39.000 Find out where the fuck that is. 1.00

01:28:40.000 This is where it gets crazy, though. 0.99

01:28:41.000 This is really where it gets crazy.

01:28:43.000 Detroit?

01:28:43.000 No, I don't think that's it.

01:28:46.000 There's one in the south, I'm pretty sure.

01:28:51.000 What's that one, July 6th, right there above Fox News?

01:28:55.000 That's probably the most... 0.88

01:28:56.000 Whenever in doubt and you're looking for something ridiculous, Fox News.

01:29:00.000 I mean, it's a difficult thing, though, because if somebody has a strong religious conviction, for example, and they're pro-choice because they think that... 0.76

01:29:06.000 I mean, pro-life because they think that abortion is murder.

01:29:10.000 Go back to that so we can see that.

01:29:11.000 That was awesome.

01:29:12.000 Look at the statue.

01:29:13.000 It's a pretty cool statue, by the way.

01:29:14.000 Look at it.

01:29:14.000 It's amazing.

01:29:16.000 It's pretty dope.

01:29:18.000 So I guess it is Detroit.

01:29:19.000 I felt like it was happening somewhere in the deep south.

01:29:21.000 Holy mother of God.

01:29:21.000 Look at that.

01:29:22.000 That's the angel Lucifer, right?

01:29:24.000 Look at that goat head. 1.00

01:29:25.000 Well, it's a satanic statue that I believe they're putting up as a goof. 0.67

01:29:29.000 The satanic temple...

01:29:33.000 File photo provided by the satanic town.

01:29:35.000 By the way, I've been accused of being a satanist.

01:29:38.000 What?

01:29:39.000 Yes.

01:29:39.000 I went to Duncan Trussell, performed at one of the LaVey's.

01:29:44.000 What's his name?

01:29:45.000 Something.

01:29:45.000 The son or the grandson or something like that was getting married.

01:29:49.000 Duncan Trussell performed his satanic puppet show at this guy.

01:29:54.000 And I went there and I wore the guy's t-shirt.

01:29:56.000 Now there's like videos accusing me of being a satanist.

01:29:59.000 I just like to clear the air.

01:30:00.000 I am neither a religious person, nor am I an anti-religious person.

01:30:06.000 I am not a Satanist.

01:30:07.000 But I have done mushrooms, and I've done some pretty powerful psychedelic drugs.

01:30:11.000 So the possibility of there being another much more powerful and wise force out there...

01:30:20.000 It does not escape me.

01:30:22.000 I think it is absolutely possible that there's something way more wise than us that we're not totally in touch with. 0.99

01:30:28.000 But I also don't think it has a dick. 0.98

01:30:30.000 So I don't think it's a he. 0.99

01:30:31.000 I don't think it's a his.

01:30:33.000 Either do Christians, either do Muslims, either do Jews. 0.89

01:30:35.000 But why do they say in his presence?

01:30:37.000 Because...

01:30:37.000 His word.

01:30:38.000 If you were to, for example, give a name to...

01:30:42.000 Yahweh.

01:30:42.000 You can say Allah and Yahweh, but Yahweh among the Orthodox is to trample on their sensibilities because when you give a name to God, okay, when you give a name, when you say God is, this is what's heretical about the idea of Jesus Christ to Jews and to Muslims,

01:31:00.000 because if you create parameters around God, if you suggest God is a man or a woman, if you suggest God has a name, Then you are assuming to understand his greatness and his infinite presence.

01:31:15.000 Are you hypnotizing me while you're rubbing your forearm here?

01:31:18.000 Yes, I am.

01:31:18.000 You're saying this at the same time?

01:31:19.000 I feel like locked into your game.

01:31:21.000 That's what happens when I start talking about religion. 1.00

01:31:24.000 God is a dick. 1.00

01:31:25.000 But here's my question. 1.00

01:31:26.000 See, I think some religion, I think Christianity is a powerful religion when used.

01:31:31.000 So a lot of Christians just preach love and doing unto others as you'd have them do unto others.

01:31:37.000 It's got powerful conversion ability of some people who saw nothing and find inspiration and love through God.

01:31:43.000 Listen...

01:31:45.000 I'm not a religious guy, but I respect whatever that conversion can be, because a lot of good things are done in the name of Jesus Christ, just as a lot of suppressive things can be done in the name of your God.

01:31:56.000 So, I'm not so ready to condemn all religion.

01:31:59.000 Well, good things can be done.

01:32:01.000 Why are they done in the name of something that's not real, and why does that make that something not real more valuable?

01:32:07.000 What's done is what's good.

01:32:10.000 But now hold on.

01:32:11.000 Because when you say it's not real, people have inspiration and deep feeling from their religion.

01:32:18.000 Digging holes.

01:32:20.000 Hammering nails.

01:32:21.000 Building buildings.

01:32:22.000 Sir, I'm going to have to ask what Donald Trump does.

01:32:25.000 That's real. 1.00

01:32:25.000 You son of a bitch. 1.00

01:32:26.000 He's a builder. 1.00

01:32:27.000 I think religious communion, prayer, meditation and things, is good for making you, it does make people more humble.

01:32:35.000 Well, any sort of inspiration is good.

01:32:38.000 Anything that motivates you is good, especially if it motivates you in a positive way.

01:32:42.000 It's good.

01:32:43.000 But the real problem becomes when someone like this lady decides that those two guys can't get married because her God prevents it. 1.00

01:32:50.000 But the Founding Fathers had an answer to that, which was to separate church and state. 0.99

01:32:54.000 Until the fucking commies came along. 1.00

01:32:57.000 Right. 1.00

01:32:57.000 Then we had to jump back in the religious game. 1.00

01:33:00.000 And then Ronald Reagan came along.

01:33:01.000 We jumped into the religious game with politics.

01:33:03.000 Well now, you know, to get elected, you've got to believe in Jesus Christ!

01:33:09.000 This is a Christian nation.

01:33:10.000 You have to.

01:33:10.000 You literally do.

01:33:11.000 You have to be a Christian. 0.93

01:33:12.000 You know?

01:33:13.000 This is a Christian nation.

01:33:15.000 Christian nation!

01:33:16.000 Well, it's not supposed to be.

01:33:19.000 It's supposed to be a nation.

01:33:20.000 One nation under God was only created back when the McCarthy era was going on.

01:33:24.000 There are parts of this country where when you perform and you say the word Jesus, the room gets very quiet.

01:33:32.000 You got the wrong places.

01:33:33.000 You're going to the wrong spots.

01:33:35.000 They should know you by now.

01:33:38.000 They should be able to do anything you want.

01:33:39.000 Yeah, well, I do.

01:33:40.000 Speaking of Kentucky, there's a thing that I posted that was fucking fascinating about the dangers of misgendering someone that Gad Saad posted it and I retweeted it.

01:33:54.000 It is Adorable. 0.99

01:33:56.000 And it's the fucking lunacy that's going on in colleges these days. 0.99

01:34:02.000 You're supposed to walk up to someone and say, Hi, nice to meet you. 0.99

01:34:07.000 What pronoun should I use for your name? 1.00

01:34:10.000 Yes, it's called fucking lunacy. 1.00

01:34:12.000 It's lunacy. 1.00

01:34:13.000 That was the direction they said that you should give.

01:34:16.000 It's tyranny.

01:34:16.000 Because you don't want to misgender.

01:34:17.000 Yeah, academics have created a tyranny. 0.98

01:34:20.000 There's a tyranny to how you have to walk around and speak.

01:34:24.000 They even want to control what you say in the bedroom.

01:34:26.000 It's called tyranny. 0.99

01:34:27.000 In the name of equality, and in the name of tolerance, and in the name of protecting the disenfranchised and the marginalized, we have created a fucking tyranny. 0.98

01:34:36.000 I can't stand the academic world for that reason. 0.99

01:34:40.000 They drive me nuts.

01:34:41.000 How does it happen, though?

01:34:43.000 Because they're so important when it comes to education.

01:34:45.000 The same way anything happens.

01:34:46.000 Distribution of information is so important, but socially, there's this oversensitive...

01:34:51.000 Because they're spineless.

01:34:51.000 Why?

01:34:52.000 Because they're spineless to the small majority of lunatics that make a lot of noise.

01:34:57.000 And, you know, I'm sorry to say this, and I admire a great deal of professors.

01:35:02.000 I've interviewed a number of them.

01:35:03.000 They're awesome.

01:35:04.000 And thank God for professors and Thank God for our academic hotbeds that, you know, come up with all these ideas.

01:35:09.000 But at the same time, a lot of academics are just terrified to make a stand.

01:35:13.000 They're fucking spineless because they live in a very safe and closed environment, and they can't speak common sense a lot of times. 1.00

01:35:20.000 Like, you people are assholes. 1.00

01:35:22.000 But doesn't that lead to what we were talking about earlier? 1.00

01:35:24.000 We were talking about what people can tolerate.

01:35:27.000 That people are tough because of the environment that they grow up in.

01:35:30.000 And it's one of the reasons why people don't respect spoiled people.

01:35:33.000 Right.

01:35:33.000 It's one of the reasons why people don't respect people who grow up rich.

01:35:36.000 Well, academics, to a certain extent, are spoiled in the fact that they don't have to compete in the real world.

01:35:42.000 Of course.

01:35:42.000 What they do is they exist in a very insulated world where they take classes from people who have also gone through the system, then they become teachers.

01:35:52.000 And when they become teachers, then they have this oppressive power over the people in their class.

01:35:59.000 And the people in their class have to listen to their ideology.

01:36:01.000 But they're also living under oppressive power.

01:36:03.000 They're living under a protocol, an academic protocol.

01:36:06.000 If you ever try to get an academic to talk about anything that he's not 100% certain about, boy are they terrified.

01:36:11.000 And the academic world is about the nastiest place.

01:36:16.000 Talk about a battlefield of ideas.

01:36:18.000 When you come up with an idea that's controversial, like Steven Pinker who said that human beings are not born a blank slate, or that aggression is rewarded in indigenous cultures. 0.99

01:36:29.000 Holy shit was he lambasted. 0.91

01:36:30.000 Yeah, he got in a lot of trouble, even though there's a lot of science that backs that up. 0.99

01:36:35.000 Look at this office for diversity and inclusion.

01:36:39.000 And look at the gender binary. 0.74

01:36:41.000 He, she, her, him, hers, his, and then gender neutral.

01:36:48.000 They, them, theirs, and then pronunciation as it looks.

01:36:52.000 But look at this.

01:36:54.000 Look at Z Her and hers. 1.00

01:36:57.000 H-I-R-S. H-I-R-H-I-R-S. Look at that. 1.00

01:37:02.000 Z-H-E-E. H-E-R-E. H-E-R-E-S. So hears.

01:37:07.000 They're creating a new language.

01:37:09.000 Z-hear-hears.

01:37:11.000 Z-hear-hears. 0.99

01:37:12.000 These are fucking gender neutral pronouns that they've invented. 0.99

01:37:16.000 They've invented gender neutral pronouns. 1.00

01:37:19.000 This is insanity.

01:37:21.000 I don't think that kind of stuff sticks.

01:37:23.000 I think it's just too crazy.

01:37:25.000 But they're trying.

01:37:25.000 This is college.

01:37:26.000 This is the University of Tennessee at Knoxville.

01:37:28.000 They're not just trying.

01:37:29.000 They're enforcing.

01:37:30.000 They're born enforcers.

01:37:31.000 If you listen to these people, they are not tolerant people, nor are they nice people.

01:37:35.000 But have you seen the woman?

01:37:37.000 Have you seen the photo of the woman who is running this?

01:37:40.000 It's wonderful.

01:37:41.000 It's wonderful.

01:37:42.000 She's perfect.

01:37:43.000 It's in the comments.

01:37:44.000 If you look at the tweet that I found, it's in my tweet.

01:37:47.000 Somebody posted a photograph of this.

01:37:49.000 Perfect.

01:37:51.000 Yes, of course she is.

01:37:52.000 Of course she is.

01:37:53.000 Of course she's... 0.99

01:37:54.000 Is she angry?

01:37:55.000 I don't know if she's angry.

01:37:56.000 She doesn't have to be angry.

01:37:58.000 Well, how about the woman who was talking about... 1.00

01:38:00.000 There was a girl in college who said that she was trying to push through legislation within the college about microaggression.

01:38:07.000 And we've got to monitor microaggression.

01:38:10.000 So even your facial, your facial, and this is Orwellian.

01:38:15.000 This is exactly what George Orwell wrote about in 1984, thought crime and face crime.

01:38:19.000 It's alive and well.

01:38:21.000 Human beings love having control over other human beings.

01:38:26.000 It is so...

01:38:27.000 We all have it.

01:38:27.000 I have it.

01:38:28.000 We all have it.

01:38:29.000 If I was emperor of the world, I'd know exactly what I'd do.

01:38:31.000 I want that power so I can do all kinds of stuff.

01:38:34.000 Because I think, and I'm speaking for myself, I think I'm so fair and I'm so nice that I can make everything better.

01:38:41.000 Never give anybody power.

01:38:43.000 There you go.

01:38:43.000 Oh, there you are.

01:38:45.000 There you go.

01:38:45.000 There you are.

01:38:47.000 Look at her.

01:38:48.000 Yeah.

01:38:49.000 I grew up with this. 1.00

01:38:50.000 I went to high school with this shit up in Massachusetts. 1.00

01:38:52.000 I know all about it. 1.00

01:38:53.000 It's madness.

01:38:54.000 Because, first of all...

01:38:56.000 I hate to say that.

01:38:57.000 You hate to judge someone based entirely on their appearance.

01:39:00.000 But if someone's morbidly obese, that person does not have good judgment in their own biological management. 0.94

01:39:06.000 The management of their own body has been grossly inept. 0.93

01:39:10.000 Mismanaged. 0.97

01:39:11.000 That's a very interesting way of putting it.

01:39:12.000 It's the only way to look at it.

01:39:13.000 She also can't be too happy with herself.

01:39:15.000 This is not a poor person.

01:39:16.000 This is a person who works at a university.

01:39:20.000 That's also probably not happy with herself, probably socially awkward. 0.90

01:39:24.000 No one can fault anyone for those things.

01:39:26.000 The problem is when someone is in that predicament and they're choosing to dictate the rules of engagement that other people have.

01:39:34.000 Because what you're doing by creating all these gender neutral pronouns and these new words, ways of...

01:39:38.000 You're trying to nerf the world.

01:39:41.000 That's what you're trying to do.

01:39:42.000 You're trying to take away the awkwardness of a boy who looks like a girl being called a girl.

01:39:46.000 When you're just like, no, I'm a boy.

01:39:47.000 Oh, sorry. 1.00

01:39:48.000 Well, fuck, man. 1.00

01:39:49.000 You look really close to being a girl. 1.00

01:39:50.000 I'm sorry. 0.99

01:39:51.000 I'm not an asshole.

01:39:52.000 I'm allowed to say that. 0.99

01:39:52.000 Yeah, but you're not. 0.99

01:39:54.000 Okay?

01:39:54.000 Or a girl who decides she's a boy and she wants to be referred to as a boy.

01:39:59.000 She wants to be referred to as a he. 0.99

01:40:01.000 Okay, well, once you tell me that, I'm okay with it.

01:40:03.000 I don't mind.

01:40:03.000 You know, if you say your name is Greg and your real name that you were born with was Donna, it doesn't bother me.

01:40:09.000 I'll call you Greg.

01:40:10.000 It doesn't bother me. 0.99

01:40:12.000 But to say that I'm the asshole because something that's completely outside the norm... 0.99

01:40:17.000 Weird and sticks out. 0.99

01:40:19.000 No, no, no.

01:40:20.000 That's that's wrong.

01:40:21.000 Yes, you know like it's it's like I don't like this vitiligo thing that I have on my hands.

01:40:26.000 It's weird And if I get really tan, then it really shows up.

01:40:31.000 But I'm white, so it's not that bad.

01:40:32.000 But when people go, like, what's that on your knuckles?

01:40:34.000 I don't like that I have to tell them.

01:40:37.000 But of course I go, oh, it's vitiligo.

01:40:38.000 It's a disease.

01:40:39.000 I wish I didn't have it.

01:40:40.000 But I do have it.

01:40:41.000 So I don't get upset if somebody asks me a question.

01:40:44.000 It's a normal question to ask.

01:40:46.000 My knuckles look different than the rest of my hand.

01:40:48.000 It makes sense that they would want to know what's going on.

01:40:51.000 This is not like a microaggression.

01:40:53.000 This is human curiosity at something that's abnormal.

01:40:57.000 It's not a bad thing that it's abnormal.

01:40:59.000 It's not a bad thing that there's a gender issue, that you wish you were a woman when you were born a man, or you wish you were a man when you were born a woman.

01:41:05.000 It's not a bad thing.

01:41:07.000 It's just, it is.

01:41:08.000 There is a difference, though.

01:41:09.000 And I think that what we're experiencing now with the transgender movement, and even to an extent the gay movement, is the pendulum swinging All the way in one direction. 0.96

01:41:20.000 And it's a reaction to the fact that, and this is just a fact, when you were a man or a woman and you felt overwhelmingly like you were a different sex and you took measures to correct your current sex or you just dressed up in a way that made you feel more yourself,

01:41:37.000 so if you're a man and you're dressed in drag or whatever as a woman.

01:41:40.000 Or, for that matter, if you were gay and you started having feelings when you... 1.00

01:41:45.000 The problem was that in most of our history, you got the fucking shit kicked out of you. 1.00

01:41:52.000 You got killed. 1.00

01:41:53.000 You got killed. 0.97

01:41:54.000 You got targeted.

01:41:54.000 You lost your job.

01:41:56.000 You got ostracized.

01:41:56.000 Yeah, and that anger and that injustice doesn't go away.

01:42:01.000 And so you have a lot of people that have...

01:42:04.000 That memory is very fresh.

01:42:06.000 That wound is very wrong.

01:42:08.000 So let's have some fake pronouns.

01:42:09.000 The way to not solve that is to then try to control the majority of the population's behavior.

01:42:20.000 What about Z-H-E-R-E? I like that. 1.00

01:42:23.000 Z-H-E-R-E? Z-H-E-R. They have those. 1.00

01:42:24.000 Z-H-E-R. That's one of them. 1.00

01:42:26.000 Yeah, I know.

01:42:27.000 Listen, I went to high school in Massachusetts.

01:42:28.000 I remember when I had to say, I couldn't say freshman.

01:42:32.000 I had to say fresh person.

01:42:33.000 I dated a girl who graduated from Wellesley College with a degree in women's studies. 0.98

01:42:37.000 Wellesley, oh!

01:42:38.000 Women's studies. 0.98

01:42:39.000 It's all about women. 1.00

01:42:41.000 Yeah, I know.

01:42:42.000 It's wonderful.

01:42:43.000 Good times.

01:42:43.000 She didn't shave her legs.

01:42:44.000 There was a white girl who I... How about that? 0.99

01:42:46.000 I suffered.

01:42:46.000 I dated a white girl.

01:42:47.000 You don't even care. 0.98

01:42:48.000 She didn't shave her legs? 1.00

01:42:50.000 Yeah, it's very European. 0.58

01:42:53.000 No, it's very hippy, bro.

01:42:54.000 There's nothing to do with European. 0.82

01:42:56.000 Fine, but her roommate was Greek.

01:42:59.000 I got in trouble for this.

01:42:59.000 Guess what her feet looked like.

01:43:01.000 Greek women.

01:43:02.000 Greek women are hot, though. 1.00

01:43:03.000 Hairy feet, bro. 0.97

01:43:04.000 She had hairy toes. 0.99

01:43:06.000 Hairy feet and hairy toes.

01:43:06.000 This was the girl you were with?

01:43:07.000 Nope, the other girl. 0.99

01:43:08.000 Her roommate. 1.00

01:43:09.000 When you're younger, man, you'll fuck a bear. 1.00

01:43:11.000 It doesn't matter. 1.00

01:43:12.000 I mean, I don't give a shit. 0.99

01:43:13.000 No, she was beautiful, but she was blonde. 1.00

01:43:16.000 She was a pretty girl.

01:43:18.000 The roommate.

01:43:20.000 There was a girl I dated who was a liberal white girl. 1.00

01:43:22.000 Oh, Jesus, that's not real.

01:43:23.000 There was this white girl, and she majored in African Studies in college. 0.99

01:43:29.000 And all I did was this.

01:43:31.000 I go, why?

01:43:33.000 Because I knew the answer was she was a liberal white girl and just wanted other black people to be like, you're my favorite white. 0.97

01:43:40.000 You're my favorite white, and you understand us, and you're down with our cause.

01:43:43.000 I know it wasn't because she was interested in African studies.

01:43:47.000 Why not?

01:43:48.000 Because.

01:43:48.000 I said, why?

01:43:49.000 Why did you choose to study African studies, not that there's anything wrong with it, and not say what you come from, like European history?

01:43:59.000 Why would you care what she studies, bro?

01:44:00.000 I just wanted to know the answer.

01:44:02.000 Okay, what was her answer? 1.00

01:44:03.000 I like black dicks. 1.00

01:44:03.000 She said, her answer was, I wish! 1.00

01:44:06.000 She wasn't even into black guys! 0.92

01:44:07.000 She goes, I find that question offensive. 0.85

01:44:10.000 And I said, that's what I thought you'd say.

01:44:13.000 Oh, that's hilarious.

01:44:14.000 That's what I thought you'd say.

01:44:15.000 Why I find that question offensive?

01:44:17.000 Because I'm not prejudiced at all.

01:44:19.000 But that's a good question.

01:44:20.000 It's a good question if you say, like, I'm a professional poker player.

01:44:23.000 Oh, why?

01:44:24.000 It's a fair question.

01:44:26.000 Or how to, well, maybe you wouldn't say why.

01:44:29.000 Yeah, you wouldn't say why.

01:44:30.000 But you would say, I want to be a professional poker player.

01:44:33.000 Why?

01:44:34.000 That's a good question.

01:44:35.000 That's a real question.

01:44:36.000 If you said, I want to be a professional poker player, I would definitely say why.

01:44:40.000 People ask me if they want to be actors, and I ask them why all the time.

01:44:42.000 Why?

01:44:43.000 What is it about acting that you want?

01:44:45.000 Pay attention to that now.

01:44:46.000 Hold on.

01:44:47.000 Do you want what you see at the awards, or do you really want to be an actor?

01:44:50.000 I want to be like Kanye West.

01:44:51.000 Yeah.

01:44:52.000 He's not even an actor.

01:44:53.000 He could.

01:44:54.000 Kanye West and Donald Trump, in my opinion, in many ways, are my least favorite Americans.

01:44:59.000 How dare you?

01:45:00.000 No, no.

01:45:00.000 I'm not talking about the politics or anything else.

01:45:02.000 I just think – and here's – I have a thought about that.

01:45:05.000 I actually think that they would have benefited a great deal, and they're accomplished people.

01:45:10.000 Don't say slavery.

01:45:11.000 No. 0.98

01:45:11.000 They would have – Donald Trump would have been a great slave. 0.98

01:45:16.000 Sir, I think they would have benefited a great deal. 0.87

01:45:19.000 Follow me on this line of logic.

01:45:21.000 I don't think they've ever been punched in the face well and hard by somebody who knows how to punch.

01:45:25.000 And here's what I mean.

01:45:26.000 The first time I got punched in the face, I actually got kicked in the head by a black belt and I got knocked out. 0.98

01:45:31.000 It hurts so badly. 0.99

01:45:33.000 I fucking renounced God. 0.99

01:45:35.000 Did you believe in God before you got hit? 0.99

01:45:38.000 No, but in other words, I thought I was the center of the universe, and I got kicked in the head, and I fell forward.

01:45:43.000 I woke up, and I was like, I quit everything.

01:45:45.000 I want my mom and a warm glass of milk, and I want a nap.

01:45:49.000 And it was a seminal moment when I was 18 because I realized I was definitely not the center of the universe and I was definitely not the tree.

01:45:58.000 I was just a tiny leaf on a very big tree that, you know, could be plucked very easily.

01:46:04.000 It was kind of a profound moment because that kind of pain and that kind of vulnerability where I realized, oh man, it's easy to kill me.

01:46:11.000 I heard a loud noise.

01:46:12.000 You don't think Donald Trump has gone through like a ton of adversity?

01:46:15.000 I don't.

01:46:16.000 No, but he doesn't act like it. 1.00

01:46:18.000 He acts like a successful guy that's rich as fuck and insulated. 0.99

01:46:21.000 That's what he acts like. 1.00

01:46:22.000 And a guy who knows a lot of the people at the top and thinks they're dopes. 0.99

01:46:26.000 He acts like a guy who donated a shitload of money to Hillary Clinton's campaign so that she came to his fucking wedding. 0.99

01:46:32.000 And she did. 1.00

01:46:34.000 And she did.

01:46:36.000 Okay?

01:46:36.000 I love it!

01:46:37.000 So when you recognize that, then you kind of understand why he acts the way he acts.

01:46:42.000 Yeah. 0.95

01:46:42.000 If you walked into a room full of retards... 0.95

01:46:44.000 See, he just feels like the king. 1.00

01:46:45.000 If you walked into a room full of retards and you had a rifle in your hand and you said, sit the fuck down, I'm running this town now. 1.00

01:46:51.000 Okay? 1.00

01:46:51.000 Because you retards have been out shooting my cows and fucking my dog and lighting my house on fire. 1.00

01:46:57.000 Everybody sit the fuck down. 1.00

01:46:59.000 Well, in a lot of ways, to a guy like Donald Trump, when he's talking about all these people in Congress that didn't know the difference between the Shia and the Sunni, when he's talking about all these people that did make these decisions based on shitty evidence, when he's talking about all these fucking people that are secretly playing poker on their fucking cell phones and they're making gigantic decisions or jerking off under the table and they get caught, 0.99

01:47:17.000 he knows that! 0.98

01:47:18.000 He's been around too long.

01:47:19.000 I'm not saying I support him.

01:47:21.000 No, no, I hear what you're saying.

01:47:22.000 I don't like his arrogance.

01:47:23.000 I don't like what he said about Mexicans, especially. 0.75

01:47:25.000 No.

01:47:26.000 It's short-sighted, and it's neglecting... 0.99

01:47:29.000 It's also bullshit, building a wall around the center. 0.99

01:47:31.000 See, neglecting what's the difference between Mexicans and Americans in the first place. 1.00

01:47:36.000 It's just luck.

01:47:37.000 Yes.

01:47:37.000 It's luck and opportunity.

01:47:39.000 There are just human beings that got unlucky. 0.99

01:47:41.000 If you were born in fucking Juarez, you would be just like them. 1.00

01:47:45.000 So fuck off. 1.00

01:47:46.000 So when he says that kind of shit... 1.00

01:47:48.000 Especially him. 1.00

01:47:50.000 You got lucky, bitch. 1.00

01:47:51.000 You got lucky. 1.00

01:47:52.000 You got lucky you weren't born in Tijuana.

01:47:53.000 If you were, you'd be just like that.

01:47:55.000 He was born to a father who had a lot of money. 1.00

01:47:56.000 That's right, son of a bitch. 1.00

01:47:58.000 But that's why he's like he is. 1.00

01:48:00.000 I do think this.

01:48:01.000 What do you think of this?

01:48:05.000 A big chief concern always in elections is the economy.

01:48:09.000 And I'm always fascinated that we never hire economic studs.

01:48:13.000 Guys who actually made a lot of money in the economy and competed, instead we hire government bureaucrats.

01:48:19.000 And I don't know what the answer is, but it seems very counterintuitive for voters to vote for, say, a guy like Barack Obama, who actually...

01:48:29.000 Didn't leave any—he never really worked in the—he was a community organizer.

01:48:32.000 He never had a real job.

01:48:33.000 And then he was—he went to—he had kind of okay grades, I think, at Occidental, and then I think Columbia.

01:48:38.000 And then he taught at Harvard, left no academic papers or legacy, and then was kind of greased into being a senator and didn't leave any legislative legacy.

01:48:48.000 And you look at the guy, and he's a really good speaker, and he seems sensible and fair, but— It's interesting that we voted for him, and I voted for him, primarily on the idea that he was black and different and sent a good message to the world,

01:49:06.000 or a thousand reasons.

01:49:07.000 But I know I wanted to show the world that we weren't a prejudiced nation after the war and that we were a progressive group of people and that Obama did seem really sensible and he seemed fair and he seemed thoughtful.

01:49:19.000 So I'm criticizing myself for this, but I I think it makes sense to vote for somebody sometimes like, you know, Republicans make it fucking so hard to vote for them, but I just feel like if you really care about the economy, vote for a guy who had to really compete and win in the economy.

01:49:34.000 They might have a better understanding and perspective.

01:49:36.000 Right, but would they be the best qualified dealing with social issues?

01:49:41.000 I don't know.

01:49:41.000 Would they be the best qualified to deal with international dilemmas?

01:49:45.000 Well, international probably, but social issues, I think the best way to deal with social issues is to do exactly nothing, maybe.

01:49:52.000 Do you think that it's possible that the whole idea of being a president is just antiquated? 1.00

01:49:58.000 It's all just some alpha male primate monkey shit. 1.00

01:50:01.000 We have to have a top dog. 1.00

01:50:03.000 No, because the way the presidency, the way our government is organized is fantastic in a lot of ways.

01:50:08.000 In terms of, the president still has veto power, but needs a two-thirds of the majority.

01:50:13.000 That didn't stop us from going into the Iraq War, which is what you originally talked about.

01:50:17.000 Yes, that's true.

01:50:18.000 And also, if you look at the president, like, if he relies on Congress, and Congress relies, I mean, all those laws that are set up in place to make sure that he, you know, doesn't have, like, ultimate power, although he can...

01:50:29.000 Why is he there in the first place?

01:50:32.000 Why do we have that?

01:50:33.000 Why do we need one person?

01:50:35.000 Why is there supposed to be one captain?

01:50:37.000 Because, ultimately, you need one...

01:50:39.000 Ultimately, the responsibility of the president is when you have six different sources, the State Department and the intelligence and all these people coming to you with the options.

01:50:48.000 You do need a decision-maker.

01:50:50.000 Really?

01:50:51.000 One guy? 0.99

01:50:51.000 That seems so ridiculous. 0.99

01:50:53.000 It's never one guy. 0.93

01:50:53.000 It's just never one guy, though. 0.93

01:50:55.000 If he really is that good, why would he have Joe Biden as his second guy?

01:50:59.000 Just stop and think about that.

01:51:01.000 Well, Joe Biden's been in government for a very long time.

01:51:04.000 When you watch the Joe Biden steroid hearings, when he's talking about steroids, when the congressional baseball hearings...

01:51:10.000 He's a politician. 0.99

01:51:11.000 He's so silly. 1.00

01:51:12.000 Yes. 1.00

01:51:13.000 He's such a silly man. 1.00

01:51:14.000 He's considered a blowhard by a lot of people on the other side of the aisle. 1.00

01:51:17.000 Oh, yeah. 0.97

01:51:17.000 I mean, Joe Biden, if you talk to anybody who's been in government a long time, he's kind of a blowhard. 0.97

01:51:25.000 I mean, he's a blustery guy. 1.00

01:51:27.000 Silly guy. 0.99

01:51:28.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:51:28.000 He really shouldn't be the top dog for the fucking country, but he's one heartbeat away from being the top dog in the country. 1.00

01:51:34.000 Yeah, a vice president has always been what your president allows it to be. 0.98

01:51:39.000 So a vice president is typically a ceremonial title where you go to different ceremonies, but it's never been...

01:51:45.000 It's really interesting.

01:51:46.000 It's an interesting role because it can be...

01:51:47.000 A very, very sort of amorphous, pointless job.

01:51:53.000 It had been up until Dick Cheney.

01:51:55.000 It's one of the reasons why Dick Cheney snuck in.

01:51:58.000 The puppet master, he figured out, like, I'll just take this gig that Dan Quayle had, you know? 1.00

01:52:04.000 I mean, I'll take this gig that really dumb motherfuckers had. 1.00

01:52:08.000 Except Al Gore. 1.00

01:52:09.000 Al Gore was a pretty well-respected, smart guy.

01:52:12.000 He was respected in some circles, but Al Gore never had much of a backbone.

01:52:17.000 Al Gore was always criticized for never really having a strong position on much.

01:52:22.000 But if you look at a guy like Barack Obama, what he's like is like a really strong headliner that takes a shitty opening act with him on the road. 0.74

01:52:30.000 You know?

01:52:32.000 Because if you listen to Joe Biden talk, and you know, he's okay.

01:52:35.000 It's alright.

01:52:37.000 It's not offensive to your ears.

01:52:39.000 He's not a terrible speaker.

01:52:40.000 But then Obama's so good.

01:52:42.000 He's so good.

01:52:43.000 He's so powerful.

01:52:44.000 He makes everything seem so comfortable.

01:52:47.000 He's such a good talker.

01:52:48.000 Yeah, but he also, at the end of the day, I think, you know, he says he's a big free market guy, but I think Obama really does believe in top-down authority.

01:52:55.000 I do think he really believes that, ultimately, a central group of smart people should be making most of the decisions.

01:53:04.000 I feel that from him. 0.97

01:53:06.000 Anybody who watches fucking Storage Wars should think that. 0.99

01:53:11.000 Watch Naked and Afraid. 0.99

01:53:13.000 You don't want to stop these people from making the critical decisions about this world's fucking future? 0.98

01:53:19.000 Yeah. 0.98

01:53:20.000 You can't.

01:53:20.000 You can't just have everybody.

01:53:22.000 No.

01:53:22.000 I mean, that's a terrible thing to say.

01:53:24.000 No, but you can certainly have, top-down, you need a federal government, my God, for certain things. 0.79

01:53:29.000 Right, but ultimately, isn't the Electoral College, ultimately, isn't that a really fucking scary thing? 0.53

01:53:35.000 I don't know.

01:53:36.000 You can decide that there's a representative of the state, so the state votes for a representative.

01:53:41.000 Well, I'll tell you what the good side of it is.

01:53:45.000 What?

01:53:46.000 It means that states that have very small populations aren't ignored.

01:53:51.000 Right.

01:53:51.000 And that's why they go to Iowa.

01:53:53.000 Right now, that's something that you need.

01:53:56.000 That's why the politicians go to Iowa, right?

01:53:58.000 There's an intelligent argument to get rid of the Electoral College. 1.00

01:54:00.000 They fucking dust these farmers off, they sit them down, and they say a bunch of bullshit to them, and they believe it. 1.00

01:54:05.000 That's because the campaign starts there. 1.00

01:54:06.000 Also because they can't read, so they just listen.

01:54:09.000 No, no, no.

01:54:10.000 That's a mistake.

01:54:12.000 A lot of farmers are super smart.

01:54:13.000 No, no, no, dude, they don't read at all.

01:54:14.000 They're too busy.

01:54:15.000 No, man, you're reading propaganda.

01:54:17.000 They're planting grain, they're picking corn all day.

01:54:19.000 They don't have any time for reading.

01:54:20.000 Those farmers are actually, most of those farmers are smart.

01:54:23.000 Well, you have to be.

01:54:24.000 Look, it's a very tight business.

01:54:27.000 Your margins are very small.

01:54:29.000 And also there's weirdness, like subsidies.

01:54:31.000 Wait a minute.

01:54:32.000 Huge subsidies.

01:54:33.000 If it wasn't for subsidies, there's a lot of farms that would be done.

01:54:36.000 Of course.

01:54:37.000 A long time ago.

01:54:38.000 And guess who benefits from subsidies?

01:54:39.000 Huge factory farms.

01:54:41.000 Yeah, huge factory farms, corporations, and the corn industry. 0.97

01:54:45.000 There's a fucking fantastic documentary called King Corn. 1.00

01:54:49.000 Ooh, it's fucking nuts, man. 0.97

01:54:52.000 These guys, they set out, I mean, I've mentioned it several times in the podcast, so I apologize if you've heard this before, but if you haven't seen it, just check it out. 0.99

01:54:58.000 This guy, they do like an analysis of their own bodies and find out what percentage they are of corn.

01:55:05.000 Some ridiculous percentage of all the carbon in their body has come from corn.

01:55:09.000 Yeah. 0.97

01:55:09.000 And then they go through the aisles of the supermarkets and they start looking at the corn syrup and corn starch and corn this and corn that and you realize how much fucking corn is in everything. 0.97

01:55:18.000 Huge lobbying efforts in cars. 0.98

01:55:19.000 And not good for you!

01:55:21.000 No.

01:55:21.000 Not!

01:55:22.000 No. 0.99

01:55:22.000 Goddamn it makes a steak good though. 0.99

01:55:24.000 Yeah. 0.97

01:55:24.000 Do you prefer a grass-fed steak or... 0.97

01:55:25.000 I like grass-fed steak only because...

01:55:28.000 Only because...

01:55:29.000 I just believe they're ruminants.

01:55:31.000 I've been told that they're supposed to eat grass, so I like things that are more natural.

01:55:35.000 I don't know if it tastes better, but for me it does because my mind says, this is grass-fed.

01:55:40.000 I'm going to be healthier.

01:55:41.000 They're different.

01:55:43.000 I prefer grass, but there's something about a really nice, fatty, corn-fed ribeye that I understand.

01:55:50.000 It's delicious.

01:55:51.000 Some of it's really good.

01:55:53.000 But it's not good for the animal. 0.99

01:55:55.000 That's for fuck sure. 0.99

01:55:56.000 And it's darker meat. 0.99

01:55:57.000 And I gotta feel like darker meat is better for you.

01:55:59.000 I know that's probably not logical.

01:56:02.000 Well, the way the meat, the way a cow, if a cow eats the way it's biologically supposed to, I'd imagine that it's probably better for you.

01:56:11.000 Well, I feel like that about eggs.

01:56:13.000 You know, sometimes my chickens, I leave them in the chicken house. 1.00

01:56:18.000 It's a big fucking chicken house. 0.99

01:56:19.000 I just had a chicken die the other day for no reason. 1.00

01:56:22.000 They just die.

01:56:24.000 Chickens don't live long.

01:56:25.000 I don't know how long they live.

01:56:26.000 Their little chicken hearts get out.

01:56:27.000 There's nothing happened to it.

01:56:29.000 It was in the coop.

01:56:30.000 And the coop, I call it a coop, but it's really a chicken house.

01:56:33.000 It's big.

01:56:34.000 Did you check its back for peck marks?

01:56:36.000 They did peck it.

01:56:37.000 They pecked it as soon as it went down. 1.00

01:56:39.000 They're fucking cannibals, those monsters. 1.00

01:56:40.000 Did they eat it? 1.00

01:56:41.000 They would eat it.

01:56:42.000 Wow.

01:56:42.000 They pecked at it, but it wasn't dead for very long before we found it.

01:56:46.000 Point being, when I don't let them out, their eggs don't taste as good.

01:56:50.000 Their eggs look different.

01:57:04.000 Sure.

01:57:07.000 Sure.

01:57:10.000 The other day I took a photo because I had eggs, and two of them were from an egg from when they were grazing, and two were from a little bit later when we had them in the coop for a few days. 0.99

01:57:23.000 And when they're in that coop, their fucking eggs come out yellow, like supermarket eggs. 0.97

01:57:28.000 Not quite that yellow, but pretty close. 0.99

01:57:31.000 Whereas otherwise, they're a dark, dark orange, and they literally taste different.

01:57:35.000 I gotta think they're more nutritious.

01:57:37.000 I mean, it only makes sense.

01:57:38.000 They certainly taste better.

01:57:40.000 Your eggs, I've had eggs from your coop.

01:57:42.000 They're amazing, right?

01:57:43.000 The Joe Rogan eggs?

01:57:44.000 Yeah.

01:57:45.000 Delicious.

01:57:45.000 You get them the day of.

01:57:47.000 Like, I get them in the morning, and then I cook them.

01:57:49.000 I'll have, like, an egg sandwich for breakfast on some sprouted bread, some Ezekiel bread.

01:57:56.000 Ooh, Ezekiel's good stuff.

01:57:58.000 With jalapeno.

01:57:59.000 I like to take the jalapeno.

01:58:01.000 It's slicey.

01:58:02.000 And then I take some El Yucateca or maybe some srirachas occasionally.

01:58:07.000 So good. 0.99

01:58:07.000 And I put it over the fucking sliced jalapenos. 0.99

01:58:11.000 Double time. 0.99

01:58:12.000 A little mayonnaise.

01:58:13.000 I'm not scared of mayonnaise, bro.

01:58:14.000 No, don't be afraid of mayonnaise.

01:58:16.000 I'm not scared.

01:58:16.000 I put a little swath.

01:58:17.000 It'll fucking work out. 0.99

01:58:19.000 If you wanted to torture my wife, you'd give her mayonnaise and onions mixed in. 1.00

01:58:22.000 She'd throw up immediately.

01:58:23.000 She doesn't like either one of those things?

01:58:24.000 I like myself some mayonnaise.

01:58:25.000 She can't look at mayonnaise.

01:58:27.000 Really?

01:58:27.000 You have a food that you just can't eat.

01:58:30.000 No, I'm a man.

01:58:31.000 Jesus. 1.00

01:58:32.000 What the fuck is wrong with you? 1.00

01:58:33.000 Okay. 1.00

01:58:33.000 Would you eat brains? 1.00

01:58:34.000 I don't have any weird phobias.

01:58:35.000 I've eaten brains before.

01:58:36.000 Not me.

01:58:36.000 I've eaten lamb's brains.

01:58:37.000 I won't eat tongue or brains.

01:58:39.000 Really?

01:58:39.000 I'm not crazy about kidney and stuff like that.

01:58:41.000 Why is that?

01:58:41.000 It's just I don't like the texture of tongue.

01:58:43.000 The texture, yeah.

01:58:44.000 Jews know how to make the tongue. 0.65

01:58:46.000 Kosher tongue?

01:58:47.000 A cow tongue?

01:58:47.000 Never had it?

01:58:48.000 No?

01:58:49.000 No.

01:58:49.000 I did have it as a kid.

01:58:50.000 And I said, this looks like a tongue.

01:58:52.000 And my grandfather said, it's not a tongue.

01:58:54.000 And I go, it looks like tongue.

01:58:55.000 I was in Greece.

01:58:55.000 And I ate it.

01:58:56.000 And I was like, it's fucking tongue. 1.00

01:58:57.000 And it was tongue. 1.00

01:58:58.000 God damn it. 0.99

01:58:59.000 I never ate it again. 0.99

01:59:00.000 Um, when we were in Montana and we ate that deer skull, you didn't eat any of that deer tongue?

01:59:05.000 No.

01:59:05.000 When they chopped up the deer tongue?

01:59:07.000 But I ate eyeball.

01:59:08.000 I ate, remember when I ate, Steve gave me the fat behind the eyeball that was raw and I ate that.

01:59:14.000 Yeah, what was that called again?

01:59:15.000 Tallow?

01:59:15.000 Yeah.

01:59:16.000 Tallow, yeah.

01:59:16.000 Yeah.

01:59:17.000 It tastes so choosy.

01:59:18.000 Chewy.

01:59:19.000 Yeah, I didn't eat it. 0.88

01:59:20.000 I saw you eating it, it was disgusting.

01:59:21.000 That was when I did the ravine comer and then I ate, uh, The Ravine Comer makes me sad to this day.

01:59:26.000 Yeah.

01:59:27.000 Because one of the funniest things that happened on the trip with Brian and I when we went to Montana with Steve Rinella and crew is that Brian created a character called the Ravine Comer.

01:59:37.000 Where I was going to come in a ravine.

01:59:38.000 It's only been a few times in my life where I almost blacked out from laughing.

01:59:42.000 That was one of them.

01:59:44.000 But you're never going to see it. 0.98

01:59:45.000 You're never going to see it, because that's fucking good old-fashioned outdoorsman, sportsman's channel. 0.97

01:59:51.000 Jesus, and we're out there hunting. 0.95

01:59:53.000 Part of it's like, I like to do with the guys like Steve Rinella and Dan Doty, who don't know what to do when I go...

01:59:59.000 Hey, is anybody using this ravine? 0.99

02:00:01.000 If not, I'm going to cum in it. 1.00

02:00:03.000 You might have a cum in the ravine. 0.99

02:00:04.000 Well, you started getting angry and yelling at it. 0.99

02:00:07.000 Yes, and then I jacked off. 0.95

02:00:09.000 I mocked jack off. 0.95

02:00:10.000 I didn't really jack off. 0.99

02:00:11.000 Kept talking about being the ravine cummer, and you had to be there. 0.97

02:00:14.000 But the point being is like, a lot of our ridiculous silliness will never make it on his show. 0.94

02:00:19.000 So we're doing this amazing performance. 0.64

02:00:23.000 You're doing it more than I am.

02:00:24.000 You're a different kind of on than I am, you know, when we go to these things.

02:00:29.000 It's one of the reasons why I love having you around, is because you just love making everybody laugh.

02:00:33.000 You love making me laugh, too.

02:00:34.000 It's my favorite thing in the world. 0.99

02:00:35.000 Yeah, you're just ridiculous with it. 0.98

02:00:37.000 This weekend, I made somebody laugh for one hour, the groom of the wedding, and this is so sick, but I made him laugh. 0.98

02:00:44.000 I've never made anybody laugh that hard for a while.

02:00:45.000 I did an hour of material, and it was all...

02:00:47.000 His son is a really good-looking 17-year-old, a wrestler, really muscular and really smooth.

02:00:52.000 Oh, this is us.

02:00:53.000 We're turkey hunting.

02:00:54.000 Is this a...

02:00:54.000 It's a short clip from...

02:00:55.000 Oh, play it.

02:00:56.000 Let's play it.

02:00:58.000 Hold on my story, please.

02:00:59.000 Play it.

02:01:02.000 Let's hear it. 0.95

02:01:05.000 Wonky-ass sportsman's channel network. 0.75

02:01:11.000 Well, let's let it load up.

02:01:13.000 Just leave it right there. 0.99

02:01:14.000 We had a good fucking time, though, man. 0.99

02:01:16.000 It was a good time. 1.00

02:01:17.000 Turkey hunting, though...

02:01:19.000 It's for the birds.

02:01:20.000 Yeah.

02:01:20.000 Here's the problem with turkey hunting, and if you love turkey hunting, I appreciate it.

02:01:24.000 Absolutely.

02:01:24.000 I get it.

02:01:25.000 I shot a turkey.

02:01:27.000 We ate some of it.

02:01:27.000 It was delicious.

02:01:28.000 Tastes just like turkey.

02:01:29.000 I don't get this.

02:01:30.000 I like to call them in, but trying to locate them and not having any idea where they are, hoping that they come.

02:01:42.000 I was asleep and snoring, and Steve Rennell was like, you're sleeping now.

02:01:45.000 I said, no, I wasn't.

02:01:46.000 Like, lying down, snoring. 0.99

02:01:48.000 But when you wake me up, I will fucking tell you I wasn't sleeping. 0.99

02:01:51.000 Automatically. 0.99

02:01:51.000 Yeah, what is it about that? 0.99

02:01:52.000 It's like that vulnerable feeling, like, I'm awake.

02:01:54.000 It's embarrassing.

02:01:56.000 I was sure that I was awake.

02:02:00.000 Man, I slept nine hours last night.

02:02:02.000 I slept nine hours last night, and I kept it a secret from my wife.

02:02:04.000 My wife goes, where were you? 1.00

02:02:06.000 I go, I was in the garage.

02:02:07.000 I lied to her.

02:02:07.000 I go, I was working out in the, uh, I was sleeping for two hours.

02:02:11.000 And I lied.

02:02:11.000 I lied right to her.

02:02:13.000 I was in my office working out.

02:02:15.000 We need a hunting show where we do it online with nobody sponsoring it.

02:02:20.000 We do it the same way we've done with podcasts.

02:02:24.000 We need that.

02:02:25.000 I need to just finance it, and I'll just hire some dude to just film us. 0.78

02:02:30.000 We'll take someone like Ryan Callahan or something like that, take us hunting somewhere, and we'll just film it.

02:02:36.000 How much could it possibly cost?

02:02:38.000 I don't know.

02:02:38.000 I mean, how much could it really possibly cost?

02:02:41.000 If we just had, like, a sponsor, like rifles that we use or, you know, products that we use like Hoyt bows or something like that, just a sponsor that could help us defer some of the costs of production, It would be so much fun.

02:02:55.000 I agree.

02:02:56.000 Because these trips, like the trip that we had when we went out to Alaska and we went out to Prince Edward Island, fucking fantastic time. 0.98

02:03:04.000 Horrible rains. 0.92

02:03:05.000 We were talking about earlier with like fun that's like fun while you're doing it.

02:03:09.000 13 hours in your tent alone.

02:03:10.000 It was terrible.

02:03:11.000 We were soaking wet the entire trip.

02:03:13.000 It never stopped raining.

02:03:14.000 If it would stop, it would stop for like 20 minutes.

02:03:16.000 Then we'd shoot some video footage of us being out there for 20 minutes looking for deer that we never found.

02:03:22.000 And then it would go right back to raining.

02:03:25.000 It was horrible. 0.99

02:03:26.000 We had so many fucking laughs. 0.97

02:03:28.000 Just the time that we were in the trailer, or the tent rather, and we had one indication of that is the podcast that we did from there, Steve's Podcast, which was one of the best ones that we did, you know, one of Steve's that we did, where it's not censored. 0.97

02:03:43.000 Like, unlike the show, it's completely free.

02:03:45.000 So we're there just laughing.

02:03:46.000 I gotta listen to that. 1.00

02:03:47.000 We were giving him so much shit about his shit collection. 1.00

02:03:51.000 Remember, Steve Rinella has, he's so fucking into wildlife, this dude had a stool collection of all the various animals that he had hunted. 1.00

02:04:00.000 He had like bear shit, duck shit. 1.00

02:04:03.000 You can show Steve a picture of shit in the wild and he'll be like, ah, that's raccoon. 1.00

02:04:07.000 I did! 1.00

02:04:07.000 I told him there was a fucking animal that was trying to get into my chicken coop and it shit in my yard. 1.00

02:04:11.000 I sent him a picture of it and he said it was a skunk. 1.00

02:04:14.000 Wow. 0.99

02:04:14.000 Yeah, and there was a fucking skunk out there. 0.99

02:04:17.000 These cunty skunks. 1.00

02:04:18.000 Skunks will kill the fuck out of your chickens. 1.00

02:04:20.000 Really? 0.99

02:04:21.000 Skunks are predators.

02:04:22.000 No.

02:04:22.000 They are?

02:04:23.000 Yep.

02:04:23.000 Yeah, skunks are predators.

02:04:24.000 That's amazing.

02:04:25.000 They'll eat birds. 1.00

02:04:26.000 Oh, yeah.

02:04:26.000 Really?

02:04:27.000 Especially chickens.

02:04:28.000 They were trying to get to my chickens.

02:04:29.000 How about raccoons?

02:04:30.000 Oh, yeah.

02:04:31.000 Really?

02:04:31.000 Yeah, raccoons are definitely...

02:04:32.000 Man, if you're a forest grouse, you better run.

02:04:35.000 Oh yeah, ground nesting birds.

02:04:37.000 Well that's what they said about turkeys.

02:04:38.000 Everybody's trying to kill turkeys all the time.

02:04:40.000 Turkeys die all the time.

02:04:41.000 A three-year-old turkey's old.

02:04:42.000 Well when we were turkey hunting, we shot a turkey.

02:04:45.000 Oops, spoiler alert.

02:04:46.000 But we only shot one. 1.00

02:04:47.000 It was a young, stupid turkey. 1.00

02:04:49.000 It's called a Jake. 1.00

02:04:50.000 I shot it. 0.99

02:04:51.000 And on Brian's day, when I was snoring, Brian couldn't fucking find a turkey! 0.99

02:04:57.000 We couldn't find a turkey! 0.99

02:04:59.000 We did rock, paper, scissors.

02:05:01.000 I won, so I got to shoot first.

02:05:02.000 So, a lot of times, what we should have done, we both should have shot at the same time. 1.00

02:05:07.000 Because three fucking turkeys came in. 1.00

02:05:09.000 We should have said, let's do this on the count of three. 1.00

02:05:12.000 We could have both had turkeys.

02:05:14.000 Just blast.

02:05:14.000 But we thought, since that was the first day, we're like, oh, we're going to see a bunch of turkeys.

02:05:17.000 This is awesome.

02:05:18.000 Yeah.

02:05:19.000 No, it wasn't.

02:05:20.000 No, it was a bunch of times sitting around in Napa Valley, okay?

02:05:23.000 We're not pretending we're in Alaska.

02:05:25.000 No.

02:05:26.000 We went to eat at fantastic restaurants every night.

02:05:29.000 Yeah.

02:05:30.000 I want to be at Bouchon. 1.00

02:05:31.000 Those dummies, they fucking ate cheeseburgers and shit. 1.00

02:05:33.000 I'm like, come on, I'll take you to the restaurant. 1.00

02:05:35.000 I'm going to pay.

02:05:36.000 Let's go.

02:05:37.000 Unbelievable.

02:05:37.000 Like, we're going to go back to the house and drink beer.

02:05:39.000 Best food in the world.

02:05:41.000 Like, literally the best restaurants in the world.

02:05:43.000 And Rinella never joined us once.

02:05:44.000 Oh, that's incredible.

02:05:45.000 He likes to pretend he's in the woods.

02:05:46.000 He doesn't like the fact that he gets to stay in a house when he hunts.

02:05:49.000 Oh, I know.

02:05:50.000 He wants to suffer.

02:05:50.000 He wants to live in the dirt.

02:05:52.000 So the fact that we were going to go and drink fine wine and eat duck.

02:05:55.000 We ate grilled duck and filet mignon.

02:05:59.000 There was a potato puree.

02:06:02.000 It took me a half hour to find the wine I wanted.

02:06:04.000 I love that.

02:06:05.000 It's a wonderful place.

02:06:06.000 But we treated it differently than them.

02:06:09.000 They did not want to admit that they were staying in a house in Napa Valley while they were doing that show.

02:06:13.000 They're pretending that they're out there in the woods turkey hunting.

02:06:15.000 You're in a guy's yard. 1.00

02:06:17.000 You're in a guy's yard, and you're shooting a fucking bird that I could buy down the store. 1.00

02:06:22.000 And here's the problem. 1.00

02:06:23.000 He fucked up when he cooked his turkey breast. 1.00

02:06:25.000 Because you know what that turkey breast tastes like? 1.00

02:06:27.000 Just like the stuff I buy at the store. 1.00

02:06:28.000 Yeah, like fucking turkey breast! 1.00

02:06:30.000 No difference. 1.00

02:06:31.000 There's no goddamn difference. 0.98

02:06:32.000 I was like, oh, this is gonna be the best turkey in the world. 0.99

02:06:34.000 No!

02:06:35.000 Nope. 0.99

02:06:35.000 Pretty fucking boring. 0.99

02:06:36.000 You guys stay here. 0.99

02:06:37.000 I'll go to the deli and have the same experience.

02:06:39.000 And, you know, I guess the legs taste a little better.

02:06:42.000 I need to cook.

02:06:43.000 You know, that's what.

02:06:43.000 Come over this week, man, and I'll cook some turkey and some mousse.

02:06:47.000 All right.

02:06:47.000 Because the turkey that we shot, I have that still.

02:06:49.000 I have most of it.

02:06:50.000 I'm around tomorrow.

02:06:51.000 We ate one breast.

02:06:52.000 One breast.

02:06:53.000 Let's do it tomorrow. 1.00

02:06:54.000 We ate one fucking breast while we were there. 1.00

02:06:57.000 And we were like, okay. 1.00

02:06:57.000 Tastes like he made schnitzel. 1.00

02:06:59.000 After I do my podcast called The Fighter and the Kick.

02:07:03.000 I heard that show was picked up by Fox.

02:07:05.000 Some crazy deal.

02:07:07.000 That's what they say!

02:07:08.000 You guys get some crazy deal with Fox Sports?

02:07:10.000 How about this?

02:07:11.000 We sold out.

02:07:12.000 Whoa, I'm waiting for someone to come along with enough money for me to sell out.

02:07:15.000 Dude, we sold the brand.

02:07:18.000 Oh, you mean the show.

02:07:19.000 We sold the live podcast out six weeks in advance at the Bray Improv.

02:07:24.000 And by the way, everybody, Tempe Improv, November 12th.

02:07:27.000 We are going to do a live podcast.

02:07:28.000 I think I'm on your live podcast.

02:07:30.000 In Tempe?

02:07:31.000 What day is it?

02:07:31.000 The one you did in...

02:07:32.000 October 1st. 1.00

02:07:33.000 On that fucker? 1.00

02:07:34.000 Yeah, you're more than welcome to. 1.00

02:07:36.000 I'm on that podcast.

02:07:36.000 Are you kidding?

02:07:37.000 I think I'm going to be on it.

02:07:38.000 That'd be great.

02:07:39.000 We're going to have a good time. 0.99

02:07:40.000 We're going to do it high as fuck, though. 0.99

02:07:41.000 We're going to get... 0.99

02:07:41.000 I'm tired of you guys talking sober. 0.99

02:07:43.000 Hey, man, come on.

02:07:44.000 Don't push your drugs on me.

02:07:45.000 It bothers me.

02:07:47.000 I think I'm gonna get Brendan to do some stand-up.

02:07:50.000 He definitely should do stand-up.

02:07:51.000 At the live podcast, I want him to do three, four minutes.

02:07:54.000 He should do it.

02:07:55.000 He could do it on Fighting in the UFC. He could definitely do it on Dating Rhonda, but he shouldn't.

02:08:01.000 Tell him not to.

02:08:01.000 He won't.

02:08:02.000 No.

02:08:03.000 No, he doesn't. 0.99

02:08:03.000 He's tired of taking shit for just saying anything. 0.99

02:08:06.000 Yeah, let it go, man. 0.99

02:08:07.000 He said that yesterday on the podcast. 1.00

02:08:08.000 He goes, just so you know, I am never talking about that shit again. 1.00

02:08:12.000 He's just so sick of it. 1.00

02:08:13.000 He can't!

02:08:14.000 She's the queen of the world.

02:08:15.000 You gotta let it go.

02:08:16.000 She's bigger than Oprah. 0.99

02:08:16.000 But he has let it go. 0.99

02:08:17.000 He's never said a bad thing about her in his life.

02:08:19.000 Well, he does love her.

02:08:20.000 He does care about her.

02:08:21.000 It didn't work out.

02:08:22.000 I've never heard that guy say one thing besides that she's great.

02:08:25.000 Well, there was the one time on the podcast where he said that he's too much of a man.

02:08:30.000 He just meant with Rhonda it's either you are going to be taking a back seat to she's driving the train or you need the extreme opposite.

02:08:41.000 That's what I think he was trying to say.

02:08:42.000 He didn't mean too much.

02:08:44.000 He's a strong personality.

02:08:45.000 She's a strong personality.

02:08:47.000 That tends to be hard to diminish. 1.00

02:08:49.000 But, um, fucking, uh, anyway. 0.99

02:08:52.000 Come see us November 12th. 0.99

02:08:54.000 Change the subject.

02:08:55.000 I like how you wanted to keep going.

02:08:56.000 November 12th, ladies and gentlemen.

02:08:58.000 Tempe improv.

02:08:59.000 A lot of fight on the kid. 0.96

02:09:00.000 What you and I really need to do is we need to do a show where it's just us doing whatever the fuck we want to do. 0.99

02:09:06.000 Yeah. 0.95

02:09:07.000 And turn it into funny.

02:09:08.000 It's like I'll be your audience.

02:09:10.000 I'll be your audience.

02:09:11.000 I come with you.

02:09:12.000 We'll do things together.

02:09:13.000 Most of it is like me setting you up.

02:09:15.000 Like most of the meat eater show, the fun stuff is me setting you up and you knocking it out of the park.

02:09:20.000 Great.

02:09:21.000 Over and over and over again.

02:09:22.000 Great.

02:09:22.000 But we have a weird dynamic.

02:09:24.000 It's really funny.

02:09:25.000 And Ronella, we talked about it before.

02:09:28.000 We were really bored at one time.

02:09:29.000 He goes, man, I wish Callan was here right now.

02:09:32.000 I go, yeah, if he was here, it would be really fun.

02:09:35.000 He goes, no offense.

02:09:36.000 I go, no, I'm not funny like that.

02:09:40.000 Occasionally I'm funny like that, but you can't count on it. 0.99

02:09:43.000 No, I'm a jackass. 0.99

02:09:44.000 I only have fun when I'm being a jackass like that. 1.00

02:09:47.000 I'm looking for any opening. 0.99

02:09:50.000 You're talking, I'm not even listening.

02:09:51.000 I'm like, where's an opening? 1.00

02:09:53.000 I can give a fuck what you're saying. 0.99

02:09:54.000 Isn't that a problem when you're doing a podcast, though? 1.00

02:09:56.000 Of course!

02:09:57.000 Of course!

02:09:58.000 A problem with my life!

02:09:59.000 I'm never serious!

02:10:01.000 But it's not necessarily a problem when we do stuff like that. 0.97

02:10:03.000 It fucking works for stand-up. 0.96

02:10:04.000 Yeah, it definitely works for stand-up. 0.99

02:10:06.000 But it also works for doing that hunting thing.

02:10:09.000 We gotta talk to Renell about that.

02:10:10.000 Let's do it!

02:10:11.000 Say, listen, because he...

02:10:13.000 I briefly talked to him and his company. 0.98

02:10:15.000 We talked about me doing a show, and I was really considering it, but first of all, there's a lot of shit that I take from hunting for no reason. 0.99

02:10:24.000 It's so silly. 1.00

02:10:25.000 I take it from people that have dogs and cats on their fucking Instagram page. 1.00

02:10:29.000 I got into it with this lady. 1.00

02:10:31.000 She's a very nice lady. 0.97

02:10:32.000 She's a tattoo artist. 0.98

02:10:33.000 She gave me a hard time about calling hunting ethically retarded or something like that.

02:10:37.000 And then I went to her page and she's got animals.

02:10:40.000 I'm like, come on.

02:10:41.000 You feed your animals murdered animals.

02:10:43.000 It's the only way you're going to keep them things alive.

02:10:45.000 If you have dogs and a cat, what do you feed them?

02:10:47.000 She admitted.

02:10:48.000 She goes, yes, it's like a necessary evil.

02:10:50.000 It was a very friendly exchange.

02:10:52.000 She had beautiful artwork.

02:10:53.000 She's a really talented tattoo artist. 0.99

02:10:56.000 I go, come on, this is silly.

02:10:59.000 You're not getting this from the dog food tree. 0.87

02:11:01.000 You're getting it from horse meat and things like that. 0.98

02:11:03.000 Well, from that and from cows and byproducts and guts and feet and all kinds of shit that they grind up and lamb, which is basically baby sheep. 0.99

02:11:12.000 The chickens, they fucking grind chickens up and compress them into cat food. 1.00

02:11:17.000 I mean, that's what it is. 0.99

02:11:18.000 And those animals are not happy and they're a real living thing. 0.99

02:11:22.000 If I shoot a moose or whatever the fuck I shoot, I'm eating that whole goddamn thing and it's one animal. 0.99

02:11:29.000 And that's one of the things that I like about hunting a large animal like that as opposed to like a turkey. 0.99

02:11:34.000 If you shoot a turkey, it's only going to live, it's only going to feed like a few people.

02:11:38.000 Like a turkey will feed five people?

02:11:41.000 Yeah.

02:11:41.000 Like that turkey we shot?

02:11:42.000 Five people can have a meal?

02:11:44.000 Yeah.

02:11:44.000 And it's over.

02:11:45.000 But it's also this.

02:11:46.000 I mean, you know, what I always say is even trophy hunting, which I don't do, even trophy hunting, is the revenue from those kinds of hunts...

02:11:54.000 I honestly hate that argument.

02:11:56.000 And I really want to talk to hunters about not using it.

02:11:59.000 Really?

02:12:00.000 Because it's true.

02:12:00.000 It is true.

02:12:01.000 But it's so fucked up that it's true. 0.99

02:12:04.000 That it's more... 1.00

02:12:05.000 It's just economy.

02:12:06.000 It's economics.

02:12:06.000 It is economics, but it's...

02:12:10.000 Here's the deal, right?

02:12:11.000 If you love something, whether it's elephants or rhinos, you love some exotic, crazy animal that we don't have in North America, and you want to pay a lot of money to shoot it, and you're not even going to eat it.

02:12:27.000 I guess they do eat elephants.

02:12:30.000 Which I didn't know.

02:12:31.000 But I guess it tastes good, man. 1.00

02:12:35.000 It's fucked. 1.00

02:12:36.000 Because they're intelligent and they're not traditionally thought of by great memories. 1.00

02:12:42.000 They remember family members from like 20 years ago.

02:12:45.000 They reunite them.

02:12:46.000 They hug.

02:12:46.000 It's trippy, man.

02:12:48.000 I've seen a video of a mother and a child reunited after 20 years, and they're hugging.

02:12:53.000 We don't think anything of a child leaving a family, because that's what we do. 1.00

02:12:57.000 If you live with your family and you're 40, you're a fucking loser. 0.99

02:13:00.000 But if you're an elephant and you have children, those children stay near you. 1.00

02:13:05.000 The structure, that's their natural structure.

02:13:07.000 We don't think anything of separating them, taking them off here, taking them off there.

02:13:11.000 It's one of the most damning things about something like SeaWorld.

02:13:14.000 They have the balls to have these commercials where they say, We haven't taken an animal from the wild in 35 years. 0.98

02:13:21.000 That's like a human having slaves. 0.99

02:13:23.000 Yeah.

02:13:24.000 Saying we haven't kidnapped this person from their family in another country in 35 years.

02:13:29.000 So this is okay that we keep these slaves.

02:13:31.000 Because that's what an orca is. 1.00

02:13:33.000 When an orca or a dolphin, they're fucking slaves. 0.99

02:13:36.000 I didn't see blackfish because I find it too upsetting. 1.00

02:13:39.000 It'll drive you crazy.

02:13:40.000 It'll drive you crazy.

02:13:41.000 It doesn't matter what they say.

02:13:42.000 There's no getting away from the fact those animals are captive.

02:13:46.000 They're going to psychosis.

02:13:47.000 Yes.

02:13:48.000 There's all sorts of problems with them, but there's just no getting away from the fact they're captive.

02:13:52.000 You're not talking about a dog, man.

02:13:54.000 My dog got upset today because I was on the other side of the fence and I was having a phone call.

02:13:58.000 And he's pawing at the door.

02:13:59.000 He wants to get to me.

02:14:00.000 Come on, man.

02:14:00.000 Hang out with me.

02:14:01.000 I'm like, dude, I'm on the phone.

02:14:03.000 I'll pet you in a minute.

02:14:04.000 Right now I'm on the phone.

02:14:05.000 You've seen my dog's yard.

02:14:06.000 It's giant.

02:14:07.000 It's an acre.

02:14:08.000 He just wants to be part of you.

02:14:09.000 Exactly.

02:14:10.000 And they don't want to be captive.

02:14:12.000 They want to be free to do whatever they want.

02:14:14.000 And this is a dog who lives in a family.

02:14:16.000 I mean, he's one of the family.

02:14:18.000 Domesticated animal, too.

02:14:19.000 He's domesticated.

02:14:19.000 He's a sweetie.

02:14:20.000 He's one of the family.

02:14:22.000 He lives in the house.

02:14:23.000 He sleeps in the house.

02:14:23.000 He's just outside doing his shing.

02:14:25.000 And he doesn't like it! 1.00

02:14:26.000 Let me out, bitch! 1.00

02:14:27.000 Come on! 1.00

02:14:28.000 What is this?

02:14:29.000 Imagine the madness if you were a person and you were forced to live in an empty tank or an empty swimming pool.

02:14:37.000 Like imagine if you're in the same structure where an orca lives, that's your world.

02:14:41.000 How much room do they have?

02:14:42.000 Not much at all.

02:14:44.000 You know what's really terrifying?

02:14:45.000 There's a photo of the SeaWorld parking lot.

02:14:47.000 It shows the parking lot and it shows where the orca enclosure is in relationship to the size of the parking lot. 0.97

02:14:53.000 It's fucking terrifying. 0.97

02:14:55.000 It's terrifying. 0.99

02:14:56.000 Yeah, you just feel claustrophobic just thinking about it.

02:14:58.000 It's this tiny little thing.

02:14:59.000 Just imagine if you had to live in a drained pool.

02:15:01.000 Imagine if that's your life.

02:15:03.000 It's a form of torture.

02:15:04.000 It is a form of torture.

02:15:05.000 It's a solitary confinement.

02:15:06.000 You know, the really crazy animal rights activists believe that you shouldn't own any pets.

02:15:11.000 That I shouldn't even have my dog.

02:15:12.000 I shouldn't have my cats.

02:15:13.000 Yeah, dogs especially are domesticated.

02:15:16.000 There's a difference between a wild animal that's tame and a domesticated animal. 0.99

02:15:19.000 Well, my cat's pretty fucking domesticated. 0.98

02:15:21.000 Yeah, and likes being around you. 0.98

02:15:22.000 Have you seen Fluffette? 0.98

02:15:24.000 I have this fucking ragdoll in the morning, okay? 0.99

02:15:27.000 We have to be really quiet in the morning because the cat will hear your voice and start meowing at the door. 0.99

02:15:33.000 Just to come in and get pet.

02:15:35.000 And you see her, as soon as you see her, she's like...

02:15:38.000 She immediately starts purring.

02:15:40.000 She coos.

02:15:41.000 Oh, yeah.

02:15:41.000 She wants you to pick her up.

02:15:42.000 She goes limp.

02:15:43.000 I mean, it's the most domesticated animal ever. 1.00

02:15:46.000 Anybody that wants that poor thing to fend for itself is a fucking crazy person. 1.00

02:15:51.000 This is a baby. 1.00

02:15:52.000 The dogs are pack animals, too.

02:15:54.000 Dogs want to be... 0.65

02:15:54.000 I imagine the cats have a pride, but dogs definitely want to be part of, you know... 0.65

02:15:59.000 My cats, I have the male and the female.

02:16:01.000 I had a cat just die.

02:16:03.000 She was 13 years old.

02:16:05.000 It's pretty sad.

02:16:07.000 Or not 13, excuse me.

02:16:08.000 She was 19. 19 years old when she died.

02:16:12.000 But the other one is seven.

02:16:15.000 And the baby, the new one, is...

02:16:18.000 10 months old, I guess?

02:16:20.000 Maybe 11 months old now?

02:16:21.000 Yeah.

02:16:22.000 I think she was born in October. 1.00

02:16:23.000 So she's a fucking baby still. 1.00

02:16:26.000 And she's like this little fluffy furball. 1.00

02:16:29.000 It's like the difference between her and an animal in the wild is so far removed.

02:16:35.000 So many generations.

02:16:36.000 It's really odd that we do that to those things.

02:16:39.000 Yeah.

02:16:39.000 You know, they make awesome pets, but it's really odd that we choose to make like an English bulldog.

02:16:45.000 Yeah, that's, that's...

02:16:46.000 Something with genetics. 1.00

02:16:50.000 And this fucking flat face. 1.00

02:16:53.000 You ever see them try to breathe? 1.00

02:16:55.000 They overheat.

02:16:57.000 I'm like, what did we do?

02:16:58.000 Yeah.

02:16:58.000 Or someone, it's not me and you, what did someone do that made that thing?

02:17:02.000 Well, they just played with genes.

02:17:03.000 That whole movement happened, when was that, in the 1920s or...

02:17:08.000 Where we started changing dogs?

02:17:10.000 Well, I think they've done it to a certain extent through the history of dog breeding.

02:17:16.000 I think it's existed for a long time, but not to the level that they've done now where they make like Pekingese and these special breeds.

02:17:24.000 I saw a guy the other day that had two wolves.

02:17:27.000 He was walking. 1.00

02:17:27.000 Are you reading tweets, you fuck? 1.00

02:17:29.000 No, no, no. 1.00

02:17:29.000 Shut that goddamn phone off. 1.00

02:17:30.000 I was actually going to go to... 1.00

02:17:31.000 Don't you dare.

02:17:32.000 ...to look that up, that other thing we were talking about.

02:17:35.000 Oh, I thought you were reading tweets.

02:17:36.000 No.

02:17:36.000 It looked like tweets to me.

02:17:37.000 No, tweets, please.

02:17:38.000 This guy was walking on the street.

02:17:40.000 There's the SeaWorld parking lot.

02:17:42.000 It's in the green.

02:17:43.000 See that?

02:17:43.000 Oh, my God.

02:17:44.000 The green is the tank, and the rest is the parking lot.

02:17:46.000 Oh, my God.

02:17:47.000 That's the orc enclosure.

02:17:48.000 Oh, no.

02:17:49.000 Yeah, it's horrible.

02:17:50.000 It's horrific.

02:17:51.000 Wow.

02:17:52.000 So this guy was walking with wolves.

02:17:54.000 He had pet wolves.

02:17:55.000 And you could tell right away.

02:17:56.000 It was really weird.

02:17:58.000 They were really cool, though.

02:17:59.000 God, they're beautiful. 1.00

02:18:01.000 They're fucking horrifying. 1.00

02:18:03.000 They're horrifying, but they're beautiful. 1.00

02:18:06.000 Wolves, to me, are this amazing creature that is...

02:18:10.000 I respect them deeply.

02:18:13.000 I love what they represent.

02:18:14.000 I love looking at them.

02:18:16.000 But they feel like a trap, man.

02:18:18.000 I think the love that some people have for animals in this really... 0.98

02:18:22.000 Distorted perception of what a predator like a wolf truly is has allowed people to import these things and put them into Idaho and all these different areas and I'm reading all these stories about what's going on now how they're decimating the elk populations and people really terrified of them and when I was in British Columbia and I was up there with my friend Mike who has a business up there a guide business and he has a farm and His fucking neighbors, 0.83

02:18:49.000 they had a cow that was killed in the middle of the night by wolves. 0.85

02:18:53.000 Yeah.

02:18:53.000 Like, they came in and killed a cow.

02:18:55.000 Sure.

02:18:55.000 Like, 20 of them.

02:18:56.000 The problem with wolves is that they're...

02:18:58.000 You talk to any farmer, any rancher, why do they hate wolves?

02:19:01.000 And this is the world over.

02:19:03.000 Wolves have been...

02:19:04.000 Like, in Sweden, they're reintroducing the wolves.

02:19:06.000 It's really controversial, because the people that make their living off their livestock... 1.00

02:19:11.000 Fucking wolves are such efficient killers. 0.99

02:19:13.000 And keeping them out is basically, it's really, really hard. 1.00

02:19:17.000 They're so smart too.

02:19:18.000 Yes.

02:19:18.000 They're so smart.

02:19:19.000 They act together.

02:19:20.000 There's a reason that farmers traditionally went after wolves right away.

02:19:23.000 Like whether it was in Italy, in Sweden, anywhere.

02:19:26.000 There's no real society that didn't go after wolves because they were so devastating to your crops.

02:19:32.000 We've gone so far away from recognizing that and remembering that, that people have brought these things back in some sort of a weird attempt to balance the ecosystem.

02:19:42.000 And when they open hunting seasons, there's all these protests.

02:19:47.000 And the protests are almost invariably from people that live in the cities.

02:19:51.000 That's the issue with the difference of Vancouver and British Columbia being a province.

02:19:55.000 The people in Vancouver, they're all liberal.

02:19:58.000 It's a beautiful place to live.

02:20:00.000 There's no wolves here, man.

02:20:01.000 Don't go killing wolves.

02:20:02.000 But the people who live where Michael... 0.96

02:20:03.000 You can kill as many wolves a day as you want.

02:20:06.000 Yeah, because you can never get rid of all... 0.97

02:20:08.000 Exactly.

02:20:09.000 They're really hard to find.

02:20:10.000 They're elusive.

02:20:11.000 I ran into this guy at the airport, and he was a really smart guy.

02:20:15.000 Really smart guy and really articulate.

02:20:17.000 Guy up in Canada.

02:20:19.000 And asked me a question.

02:20:21.000 You know, what are you here for?

02:20:23.000 I forget what he told me his business was.

02:20:25.000 I probably wouldn't say it anyway.

02:20:26.000 Somehow or another, people would figure out who he is.

02:20:29.000 But he was talking to me about his business.

02:20:31.000 We were talking a little bit.

02:20:32.000 And he asked me what I was up here for.

02:20:34.000 And I told him I was up there for a hunting trip.

02:20:36.000 And then he started talking to me about how much he hunts wolves.

02:20:39.000 Right away, he goes into this, yeah, we hunt wolves all the time.

02:20:43.000 And he goes, you got to.

02:20:44.000 I own a piece of property up there, and we've seen them chase down calves and kill them.

02:20:49.000 He goes, we've seen it.

02:20:50.000 He goes, we've seen the wolves.

02:20:52.000 He goes, there's just so many of them that what we do is they take garbage bales, like a big garbage pail, and they fill it with meat.

02:20:59.000 And then they pour water into the garbage pail.

02:21:02.000 So it's filled to the top with water and meat.

02:21:05.000 Then they freeze it.

02:21:07.000 And once they freeze it, then they take it, and they put it out like a popsicle.

02:21:11.000 Wow.

02:21:12.000 And then the wolves can't take it all at once, so they'll definitely keep coming to it.

02:21:15.000 So they get a little bit of the meat, and they'll come back for more, and they've got to chew through the ice, and there's meat inside the ice, and then they'll shoot them.

02:21:21.000 Oh. 0.99

02:21:22.000 And he goes, we shoot them all year long. 1.00

02:21:25.000 We have to shoot them as many as we can. 1.00

02:21:27.000 I've heard the Inuit. 1.00

02:21:29.000 What a different reality, man.

02:21:31.000 The Inuit used to take, because wolves were such a nightmare for them, they'd steal their food, their seal, and they would put a razor blade, like a knife with a piece of meat on it, and the wolf would eat the meat and then lick the blade.

02:21:43.000 The blade would cut themselves up and die.

02:21:46.000 And just bleed that way. 1.00

02:21:47.000 Yeah, they would put blood on them. 0.98

02:21:49.000 And keep licking their own blood. 0.99

02:21:50.000 On a knife, razor sharp knife. 0.99

02:21:52.000 Yeah.

02:21:52.000 Yeah, it was terrifying.

02:21:53.000 Oof.

02:21:54.000 Harsh.

02:21:55.000 A harsh way to live.

02:21:57.000 That's those worlds, man.

02:21:58.000 That's those worlds.

02:21:59.000 I really think that a certain amount of struggle, like you said, a certain amount of losing makes you more humble and respectful.

02:22:07.000 And like what you were talking about, where a guy like Donald Trump, this sort of conversation is all coming around in this one thing.

02:22:13.000 That's what we do here.

02:22:15.000 But it really is in this one.

02:22:16.000 And what we're talking about, about academia, about the cowardice of this new way of pushing ideology.

02:22:26.000 Objective reality.

02:22:26.000 Feeling something, hitting a wall is very important.

02:22:29.000 And they're thought bullies.

02:22:30.000 There's thought bullies about it.

02:22:31.000 And where's that all coming from?

02:22:33.000 Well, I mean, it really is coming from there's a lack of real world experience and a lack of adversity.

02:22:38.000 The adversity has only been intellectual diversity.

02:22:41.000 So this, adversity rather, so there's these conversations they're having, the battles that are going on. 1.00

02:22:46.000 They're about ridiculous shit. 0.99

02:22:47.000 They're not about survival. 1.00

02:22:49.000 They're about calling someone Z or he.

02:22:51.000 And there's anger and there's rhetoric and there's protests. 0.99

02:22:56.000 There's this crazy need to control what the other people think and what is acceptable and not acceptable on my fucking campus. 0.98

02:23:04.000 Have you ever seen the Toronto protests? 0.99

02:23:07.000 Somebody's sensibility is sacred.

02:23:10.000 Have you ever seen the Toronto protests where these feminists There was some guy who was promoting something that had to do with men's rights. 0.98

02:23:17.000 They completely distorted what he had to say, completely distorted what his message was, and promoted him as this evil person who supported rape and hated women. 0.99

02:23:26.000 And so they shut down his performance by turning on a fucking fire extinguisher, a fire alarm. 1.00

02:23:32.000 They set off a fire alarm and all cheered. 0.99

02:23:34.000 They were protesting in the hallways while this guy's on stage speaking.

02:23:38.000 No, that's not surprising.

02:23:39.000 It's a hostile act.

02:23:41.000 It's a controlling act.

02:23:43.000 It's exactly what the Red Guard did in Mao's China. 0.79

02:23:45.000 And there are a thousand examples of people who get swept away with an ideology.

02:23:50.000 These are very religious people.

02:23:51.000 And by that I mean they're fanatically devoted to what they think is a certain truth or set of truisms.

02:23:57.000 And they'll do whatever they can.

02:23:59.000 Well, that's why it's important what you're saying because they'll do whatever they can, but what it's not based on is reality.

02:24:07.000 So, like, if there really was a person that was at this campus that was promoting raping women and doing horrible things to them and this is what you should do and he's trying to rally them up, absolutely everyone agrees they should be treated the way these women were treating that guy. 0.98

02:24:23.000 The question is, is what he's promoting that or are you turning it into that in order to make it justifiable for you to go fucking crazy? 0.96

02:24:32.000 Because that's what a lot of it is. 0.96

02:24:34.000 I think so.

02:24:34.000 What a lot of it is, people decide they have a target and then justify their actions based on that.

02:24:40.000 Also, they shoot their guns at the wrong target, because it's an easy target.

02:24:46.000 But that's an important point, though. 1.00

02:24:48.000 In their defense, I mean, if someone really is promoting rape, fuck that guy, right? 1.00

02:24:53.000 Right. 0.99

02:24:54.000 So that would be a realistic reason to use that target for what they're saying.

02:24:59.000 So they make him that.

02:25:00.000 Yeah.

02:25:01.000 They distort what he is, and they turn him into that, so then it's justifiable.

02:25:05.000 Yes.

02:25:05.000 And the women were screaming at these men that were trying to go in and listen.

02:25:09.000 All they wanted to do was hear what this guy had to say.

02:25:11.000 Screaming at them. 1.00

02:25:12.000 You fucking piece of shit. 1.00

02:25:13.000 You support rape. 1.00

02:25:14.000 Like, what are you talking about? 0.87

02:25:15.000 But this anger and violence and vitriol.

02:25:18.000 It gives them a cause.

02:25:19.000 Exactly.

02:25:20.000 People want a cause.

02:25:21.000 There's no adversity.

02:25:22.000 They want to feel like they're revolutionaries.

02:25:24.000 There is no adversity.

02:25:25.000 There's not enough adversity.

02:25:26.000 Healthy.

02:25:26.000 Yeah.

02:25:27.000 It's also not honest.

02:25:29.000 I don't think they're being honest with themselves or with what the real problem is.

02:25:34.000 And that's another issue, is that if you're too ideological and religious, you're going to be placing your energy and your anger in the wrong direction.

02:25:43.000 And there are real challenges and problems.

02:25:46.000 And it takes sober thought, sober thought, sober analysis, and an open mind to finding out and developing a very informed point of view.

02:25:57.000 So that then you can actually tackle what's really going on.

02:26:01.000 And good luck finding someone else who's also taking the same amount of consideration into a subject and hasn't approached it with some intense bias.

02:26:08.000 Exactly.

02:26:09.000 So having these debates with these people, it's like there's bridges you can't cross.

02:26:12.000 There's things that you can't say.

02:26:14.000 Well, it's very important though.

02:26:15.000 Now, when you have a debate, and I'll give you an example.

02:26:17.000 Very important in my opinion, the problem with debate in this country is this.

02:26:21.000 Let's take gun control as an example.

02:26:23.000 The first thing you hear is, I'm in favor of guns, I'm in favor of gun control. 0.56

02:26:27.000 But what you actually hear when they start the debate is this.

02:26:30.000 You're a gun nut, and I don't like you.

02:26:32.000 You're a hippie liberal, and you don't know what this country was founded on. 0.95

02:26:35.000 And that's where we start.

02:26:36.000 And the minute that happens, there is no way anybody's going to have a discussion, because it starts with, I don't like you.

02:26:42.000 Oh yeah, I don't like you.

02:26:43.000 Instead of saying, hey guys, We're both good people who have a different point of view, and we're trying to solve a problem.

02:26:50.000 Nobody in this room thinks that somebody should be allowed to go in and massacre a school or a movie theater.

02:26:57.000 We know we want to solve that problem.

02:26:59.000 Now, this side believes everybody should have guns.

02:27:02.000 This side believes they shouldn't.

02:27:03.000 Where is the middle ground?

02:27:04.000 Let's have a real discussion.

02:27:06.000 It never starts that way, unfortunately.

02:27:08.000 A lot of times it just becomes this crazy sort of, this is my camp, this is my idea, and I'm more interested in being right based on my ideology that's immovable.

02:27:21.000 And it's very difficult to kind of step back and be sober in these thoughts, in these situations.

02:27:27.000 For example, like gun control is interesting, because when this guy came up and shot these two reporters, And this psychiatrist...

02:27:34.000 It just happened recently, right?

02:27:35.000 Yeah.

02:27:35.000 And this psychiatrist, I think his name is Lieberman, Jeff Lieberman, and I think he's out of Columbia University.

02:27:40.000 He said something really interesting.

02:27:41.000 Probably a black guy, right? 0.99

02:27:42.000 He was a black guy. 0.89

02:27:43.000 Jeff Lieberman? 0.75

02:27:44.000 Yes, Jeff Lieberman.

02:27:45.000 He's a Jew, right? 0.97

02:27:45.000 Yes, he's Jewish. 0.97

02:27:46.000 I knew it.

02:27:47.000 You guessed.

02:27:48.000 Good guess.

02:27:49.000 Good guess.

02:27:50.000 But he had something really interesting to say, and it was a really interesting debate I'd never heard before.

02:27:54.000 He said, look...

02:27:55.000 Mental illness.

02:27:58.000 There is an idea that maybe if somebody is exhibiting psychotic behavior and talking about wanting to hurt other people and himself, a lot of people who have mental illness are not willing to take their drugs because they don't think there's anything wrong with them.

02:28:13.000 So how do you deal with that?

02:28:14.000 Well, he said, what about in some instances outpatient care that is mandated?

02:28:21.000 And we're like, wait a minute, that steps on my civil rights.

02:28:24.000 You can't tell me to take drugs.

02:28:25.000 And he said, but wait, if you have tuberculosis...

02:28:28.000 You are mandated by the Center for Disease Control to take your drugs because you're contagious.

02:28:32.000 And you're not allowed to not take antibiotics when you have tuberculosis.

02:28:36.000 And usually it's a nine-month regimen.

02:28:38.000 It can turn you colorblind like it did my buddy Jimmy Burke and all that.

02:28:42.000 But what about those questions?

02:28:45.000 What about stuff that kind of throws things in the air?

02:28:48.000 Hey, you just filled me with a cloud of whatever.

02:28:51.000 I'm trying to give you contact.

02:28:52.000 Those are important questions to raise, man.

02:28:55.000 They are.

02:28:56.000 I didn't know Jimmy Burke went colorblind.

02:28:58.000 Yeah, from his antibiotic regimen. 1.00

02:29:00.000 Fuck. 1.00

02:29:01.000 Yeah, he's colorblind now. 1.00

02:29:02.000 And what is that from?

02:29:03.000 What disease was it?

02:29:04.000 He had tuberculosis.

02:29:05.000 And so the antibiotics just killed it forever.

02:29:08.000 Yeah.

02:29:09.000 Whoa.

02:29:09.000 Yeah, but he had to take them.

02:29:11.000 So what do you think? 0.82

02:29:12.000 If somebody's saying, I want to kill people, and he's just saying it. 0.95

02:29:16.000 Yeah, that's a mental illness, and I think it is a good idea to treat it as it is an illness. 1.00

02:29:19.000 And the problem with the mental illness stigma, and Cara Santa Maria, who's been on this podcast a bunch of times, she's A neuroscientist, very smart, and she's had mental illness issues herself with depression, which is also a mental illness.

02:29:33.000 It's not well.

02:29:34.000 We treat them differently than we treat any other illness.

02:29:36.000 Like, there's no shame in having diabetes. 1.00

02:29:39.000 You know, we find out that you have a disease, we don't go, you got fucking diabetes, bro. 1.00

02:29:43.000 Like, it's a disease. 1.00

02:29:44.000 So we treat it with medicine.

02:29:46.000 You know, same thing with virtually every disease except mind diseases.

02:29:50.000 And when someone has a mind disease, we automatically assume that they're being weak.

02:29:55.000 We automatically put them into this box.

02:29:56.000 Oh, you're depressed? 1.00

02:29:57.000 Oh, poor fucking baby. 1.00

02:29:59.000 Think you're gonna be fine, dude? 1.00

02:30:00.000 What are you gonna be? 1.00

02:30:01.000 You're happy, you know, fucking born in the 1600s. 0.99

02:30:04.000 You know, there's all the nonsense that comes with people admitting that there's a chemical imbalance in their brain, which we can't really measure. 0.99

02:30:12.000 That's the problem. 0.99

02:30:13.000 They can't fucking, they can't just pull the juice out of your brain and measure you for depression, you know? 0.98

02:30:18.000 They can't really measure, like, there's no, like, scale that shows what drug is gonna work for you. 0.99

02:30:23.000 Right.

02:30:24.000 Which is one of the weirdest things about taking antidepressants.

02:30:27.000 But whatever the case, It's some form of medication for a disease.

02:30:34.000 And when someone doesn't want to take that medication, this is one of the episodes, the episode I was talking about called Elements on Radiolab that was talking about lithium.

02:30:43.000 This woman who can't take this medication anymore. 0.99

02:30:46.000 When she takes it, she's her. 1.00

02:30:48.000 It is a mental illness. 1.00

02:30:50.000 She has a mental illness. 1.00

02:30:51.000 Being bipolar. 1.00

02:30:52.000 It's an absolute disease.

02:30:53.000 And when she takes this stuff, she's totally normal.

02:30:56.000 So, this idea that we have about medication when it comes to mental illness, I think it's the one illness that we have this, like, criticism of or this prejudice of that we can justify.

02:31:10.000 Because it's hard to measure.

02:31:11.000 Yes.

02:31:11.000 Yeah, and who decides?

02:31:13.000 And there is criteria and there are experts that can say, I think, in some instances, hey, this dude is exhibiting classic psychotic behavior and he's going to hurt somebody.

02:31:26.000 And I think it would behoove the authorities to mandate some kind of a drug regimen or something.

02:31:33.000 People don't know when to say that, though.

02:31:35.000 You have a guy who hasn't done anything yet.

02:31:37.000 He just seems a little off.

02:31:38.000 You don't know what it is.

02:31:39.000 It's dicey.

02:31:40.000 It's very, very tricky stuff because now you're talking about a government agency coming in there and making you take drugs.

02:31:46.000 But in some instances, it might save a lot of lives if you've got a crazy person.

02:31:52.000 And the question becomes, if that is a viable alternative to having people get shot up in some instances, what do you do about it?

02:32:00.000 It is a really good question and a really hard one to answer.

02:32:03.000 Because here's another factor.

02:32:04.000 When you do an experiment, the fact that you're doing an experiment...

02:32:11.000 It has an effect on the results of the experiment itself.

02:32:14.000 A classic one that we've talked about on this podcast before, I think it was Carl Hart that brought this up.

02:32:19.000 It's a brilliant point that I never even considered.

02:32:21.000 They always talk about these things that they do with rats.

02:32:23.000 You know, they give rats heroin, and the rats do the heroin every day, and then they keep doing their tasks.

02:32:30.000 But if you give them cocaine, they just do cocaine until they die.

02:32:34.000 He goes, yeah, but they're in a cage during an experiment.

02:32:38.000 This isn't a normal rat.

02:32:39.000 Change the rat cage.

02:32:41.000 You change the entire experiment.

02:32:42.000 Stop doing the drugs.

02:32:43.000 It's not like you're giving them cocaine in the woods.

02:32:46.000 Well, if you did that, you would have much more reasonable results.

02:32:50.000 Well, do you know what the results were?

02:32:52.000 It's fascinating.

02:32:52.000 Yeah.

02:32:52.000 So they laced the water with cocaine and heroin.

02:32:55.000 Rats kept doing it until they died.

02:32:57.000 And then this experimenter came along and said, why don't we change the rat cage?

02:33:00.000 I'll create Rat Disneyland. 0.94

02:33:01.000 And he created a utopia for rats. 0.78

02:33:05.000 They had plenty of sex, friends to play with, lots of things to keep themselves occupied. 0.85

02:33:09.000 Do you know how many rats kept going back to the cocaine and heroin bottle? 0.57

02:33:12.000 None.

02:33:13.000 After a while, from what I was told, the experiment yielded no addiction, and they all started drinking water and went back and they kind of said, I'm done with that drug thing.

02:33:24.000 So it changes things up.

02:33:26.000 Well, also, okay, let's think about that for a second, because if we're living the way we're living today, it's because people before us have figured out how to build houses and electricity and cars, but how many generations?

02:33:37.000 How many generations in relationship to the DNA that's in our body that supposedly takes like 10,000 plus years to change?

02:33:45.000 I mean, how similar are we to people that lived 10,000 years ago?

02:33:49.000 Probably almost exactly.

02:33:51.000 Physiologically.

02:33:52.000 Really, really, really fucking close, right? 0.95

02:33:54.000 Maybe the reason why people are into drugs and constantly trying to alter the state of their consciousness today is directly connected to these rats being willing to do this experiment, or being willing to go back to the cocaine until they fucking died in this experiment, 0.88

02:34:11.000 as opposed to the way they were in the wild.

02:34:12.000 Like, maybe if we were living in the wild, maybe if we lived the way people lived thousands of years ago, it's hunter-gatherers.

02:34:19.000 Maybe if we did that, we would have no desire to do coke I would agree with you if I didn't know that pygmies in certain parts of the Congo smoke copious amounts of weed. 1.00

02:34:28.000 Yes, they do.

02:34:28.000 And if people in the Amazon who are hunter-gatherers take all kinds of hallucinogenics.

02:34:32.000 Stop and think about the drugs that you just described.

02:34:34.000 Copious amount of weed, which makes them more sensitive, more paranoid, maybe keeps them alive more, more community-oriented, more loving, and maybe even more creative.

02:34:44.000 So you're talking about marijuana.

02:34:46.000 If you're talking about the people that live in the indigenous tribes in the Amazon, you're talking about serious psychedelic drugs that are ego dissolving that remove the world around you and bond you inexorably as this tribe.

02:34:58.000 Right.

02:34:58.000 So you're not talking about heroin, you're not talking about coke, especially not talking about coke.

02:35:02.000 Right. 0.99

02:35:02.000 Like how many fucking people They do chew coca leaves in a lot of those environments. 0.99

02:35:08.000 It's a different effect. 0.99

02:35:09.000 In Peru.

02:35:09.000 Yeah, but it's...

02:35:10.000 Coca leaves apparently...

02:35:11.000 They chew got as well in Ethiopia and places.

02:35:14.000 Got is a...

02:35:15.000 Yeah, but isn't that more like a narcotic?

02:35:17.000 It's a narcotic.

02:35:17.000 Yeah.

02:35:18.000 It keeps you mellow, I think.

02:35:20.000 Coca leaves apparently is really nice.

02:35:22.000 It's really nice.

02:35:23.000 Does God keep you mellow or does it actually hype you up?

02:35:26.000 I think it's a stimulant.

02:35:27.000 I think that stuff is a...

02:35:30.000 Because I chew a shitload of it in the Middle East. 0.97

02:35:31.000 I remember it as a kid.

02:35:33.000 Yeah.

02:35:34.000 I wonder if we went back to living this sort of subsistence life, if any of that stuff would have any pull on us at all.

02:35:42.000 I don't know.

02:35:42.000 But I do think that the new science of like Portugal decriminalized all drugs, all drugs.

02:35:48.000 And what they did is a really interesting thing.

02:35:49.000 They think by some measures in 2000, 1% of the population was hooked on heroin, which is incredible.

02:35:55.000 Huge addiction issue.

02:35:57.000 And you have to be careful with these statistics, but this is what I heard on TED.com.

02:36:01.000 And when the government said, I'll tell you what, instead of spending all this money on enforcement and rehab and stuff, we'll take addicts, we'll decriminalize it, and what addicts need is connection.

02:36:12.000 So what we'll do is we'll say, we'll get them in rehab and we'll take care of that, and then we'll get them a job and we'll say to their employer, look, train this guy, we'll pay half their wages.

02:36:23.000 It'll cost you half as much to hire this addict who is going to take your program.

02:36:28.000 We have our own programs.

02:36:29.000 They're managing their addiction.

02:36:30.000 And they've had huge success because what happens to the addict is that they develop connections and they develop purpose and they develop an entire infrastructure of support around them.

02:36:43.000 And that apparently...

02:36:45.000 From what I understand, a lot of addiction specialists talk about that being very important, man.

02:36:51.000 Connection is a great antidote to your addiction issues.

02:36:58.000 I'm not an addiction specialist.

02:37:00.000 Yeah, I'm not either.

02:37:01.000 I think one of the big problems with addiction specialists in this country is they're only allowed to use methods outside of drugs There's some people that get some spectacular results in other countries, especially in Mexico with ibogaine, people that are hooked on pills.

02:37:15.000 What's ibogaine?

02:37:15.000 Ibogaine is from the iboga plant, and it's a really intensely introspective drug that is not a fun time at all.

02:37:24.000 There's very little recreational Ibogaine.

02:37:26.000 It's just like really intense view of your life.

02:37:31.000 Very, very deep and complex view of your life.

02:37:35.000 And it also shuts off some physical reactions to addiction.

02:37:39.000 Somehow or another rewires the mind in some strange way that's very, very effective.

02:37:44.000 I've had friends that have had pill problems that have gone to these retreats in Mexico and had ibogaine treatment and just completely knocked it out.

02:37:53.000 How much of it is placebo?

02:37:54.000 Who knows?

02:37:55.000 No, it's not placebo at all, I don't think.

02:37:57.000 Because what we're talking about is an insanely intense, introspective experience that's not...

02:38:04.000 Not dissimilar from the DMT trip that you went on in the fact that it dissolves reality.

02:38:10.000 It dissolves reality in some sort of strange way.

02:38:13.000 And then I haven't experienced the Ibogaine, those trips, but I have quite a few friends have done it and every one of them said it sucked.

02:38:22.000 Like they did not like it.

02:38:23.000 Like it's really harsh, but the results are spectacular.

02:38:26.000 Like the results, like when you get through that, you're like, okay, I see it all.

02:38:30.000 It's all mapped out now.

02:38:31.000 Like, what am I doing in my life?

02:38:33.000 Like, what are all these pitfalls that I've set up for myself?

02:38:35.000 What are all these traps that I've like left in my personality?

02:38:39.000 What are all these excuse mechanisms that I have just ready to fucking pop off and send me to the bar?

02:38:45.000 What are those things? 0.83

02:38:46.000 Well, you see them like they're like targets.

02:38:49.000 You see them all around you, like really obvious landmines.

02:38:53.000 It's weird how people have a lot of those.

02:38:55.000 We all have some of those.

02:38:56.000 But for me, my way of getting out of that is I just ask myself what I really want.

02:39:01.000 And I think that's helpful when I just go, what do I really want to do and get good at?

02:39:06.000 What really interests me?

02:39:07.000 I think you've never been addicted physically to anything.

02:39:10.000 Nor have I. So I think we're talking out of our ass when it comes to that. 0.99

02:39:13.000 Yeah, I never have. 0.99

02:39:14.000 Thank God.

02:39:15.000 I feel lucky that I don't have that.

02:39:17.000 I don't drink much.

02:39:19.000 I never had any of that stuff. 1.00

02:39:20.000 Yeah, the pill one and the heroin one, man, that is a goddamn crazy one. 0.98

02:39:25.000 The coke one, I've seen them all, and they're real hard to figure from the outside. 0.98

02:39:29.000 I haven't experienced the ache in their bones.

02:39:34.000 Well, what about how much people drink in this country and have always...

02:39:38.000 This country has always been a nation of drinkers, man.

02:39:41.000 And that's why we get gas. 0.99

02:39:43.000 We don't give a fuck. 0.99

02:39:44.000 We get drunk. 1.00

02:39:45.000 We make shit happen. 0.98

02:39:49.000 But it's responsible for a lot of great art, too. 0.99

02:39:52.000 You know, that's one thing that people don't want to admit.

02:39:54.000 Of course. 0.99

02:39:55.000 How much fucking great music was created by drunk people? 0.99

02:39:57.000 I don't know. 0.99

02:39:58.000 I think a lot of great music was created by people who sat in rooms and just played music.

02:40:05.000 Well, that's true, too.

02:40:06.000 You know what I mean?

02:40:07.000 They say that what destroyed the Haight-Ashbury movement, that wonderful psychedelic movement, was when musicians went from weed and psychedelics to heroin and cocaine.

02:40:16.000 And the heroin and cocaine was what actually destroyed a lot of great musicians.

02:40:20.000 Yeah, but that's coke.

02:40:20.000 We're talking about booze.

02:40:22.000 I think there's been a lot of artists that have used booze, including writers.

02:40:26.000 Historically, there's been a lot of writers that were drunk.

02:40:28.000 Stephen King, when he's in his prime, was a drunk.

02:40:29.000 Yeah, Stephen King said in his book, which I read, he said, there are a lot of, yes, there are a lot of creative people that have substance abuse problems, he said, but they happen to be very creative people with substance abuse problems.

02:40:38.000 He said they were creative, and then they had a problem, but it's not what made them creative.

02:40:43.000 That's possible that he's right, but it's also possible that he's saying that because he's not an addict anymore, and he doesn't want to go back to it, and so he's made this sort of connection in his mind that it wasn't the alcohol that allowed him to be so free and creative.

02:40:55.000 It was his own free creativity that he had in his mind, and he had a problem.

02:41:00.000 It's true.

02:41:00.000 Or here's another possibility.

02:41:02.000 There's correlation and, you know, causation.

02:41:04.000 They're not clearly defined in this.

02:41:06.000 No, no.

02:41:06.000 Here's another possibility, too.

02:41:08.000 People that are creative and have great imaginations and allow themselves to have a great imagination may also be, to some degree, may be a little self-destructive or at least searching for different states.

02:41:21.000 And so maybe...

02:41:24.000 Maybe, you know, the kind of person that's imagined enough to write a book like Cujo also likes putting himself in something other than his sober state.

02:41:33.000 Totally possible, as well.

02:41:35.000 Totally possible, as well.

02:41:37.000 But I think there's also some thoughts that come to you when you're drunk.

02:41:40.000 Like, I've done some drunk writing, especially on airplanes. 1.00

02:41:44.000 God, I'm an idiot when I'm drunk. 0.70

02:41:45.000 Well, I listen to, like, music and have a couple Budweiser's, and I'll write, and I'll write some stuff that I might not write. 0.99

02:41:54.000 Dude, when we were doing The Ice House one time, I was, one of the first times, it was in a small room, and I smoked a bunch of weed, and I don't do it, and I got high doing your podcast, and I drank some scotch, because you forced me, peer pressure.

02:42:07.000 I don't think so.

02:42:08.000 And I wrote, and I got up on stage and crushed the room with a whole thing I kind of memorized about how I saved a whale. 0.98

02:42:15.000 Now, I never would have thought about saving a fucking whale without that state. 0.95

02:42:19.000 So maybe it did open up some channels. 0.99

02:42:21.000 Stephen King, go back to the booze.

02:42:23.000 Here's the late Oliver Sacks said something incredible.

02:42:26.000 Do you know the story about Philip Plaginett?

02:42:30.000 I think it's Jason Plaginett, I think his name is.

02:42:32.000 Furniture salesman, 1994, comes out of a bar, gets savagely beaten, and starts having sort of deep mathematical, geometrical things.

02:42:53.000 I'm trying to figure out the relationship.

02:42:55.000 And he goes, you're drawing high math.

02:42:58.000 Long story short, he'd never been interested in math at all, and in 2015, he is considered a math genius.

02:43:05.000 He got beaten.

02:43:06.000 Oliver Sacks did a great thing on a guy named Tony Sioria.

02:43:09.000 Gets struck by lightning.

02:43:11.000 He's an orthopedic surgeon.

02:43:12.000 The lightning goes through his cheek, comes out his foot. 0.99

02:43:15.000 I just want to say right now, if you're a shitty musician, don't let someone kick you in the head. 0.99

02:43:19.000 Dude, I've got it. 0.99

02:43:20.000 Don't do it.

02:43:21.000 I'm going to be a math genius. 1.00

02:43:23.000 Kick the shit out of me and let me see what happens. 1.00

02:43:25.000 Most creative people are drunk. 1.00

02:43:27.000 Tony Sioria.

02:43:28.000 What is this?

02:43:30.000 This is an article about the Churchill gene.

02:43:32.000 The Churchill gene.

02:43:33.000 Winston Churchill always had some alcohol in the system.

02:43:38.000 But listen to this.

02:43:40.000 Tony Sciuria, who Oliver Sacks studied, basically gets struck by lightning.

02:43:44.000 All he can hear is piano music and becomes a composer and a high-level composer and a piano player because all he wanted to do after that was play the piano.

02:43:51.000 And he was never interested in music.

02:43:53.000 So the idea is maybe sometimes certain things that happen to your brain can open...

02:43:59.000 Pathways and channels and circuitry that was blocked or wasn't activated before.

02:44:05.000 In this case it was a beating and lightning, but there are examples of something traumatic happening to someone's brain where it opens up an entire new passion and interest in that person.

02:44:16.000 And that's documented by the late Oliver Sacks and a lot of other people.

02:44:20.000 That's kind of fascinating.

02:44:21.000 Well, I think that the mind is some sort of a device, and this device relies, like the rest of the body, on all the different elements that keep a human being alive.

02:44:33.000 Human neurotransmitters are flowing around, there's neurons firing, there's all these cells that are alive.

02:44:38.000 I mean, the mind is just like this fascinating place.

02:44:41.000 Now, when you introduce things that are psychoactive to the mind, whether it's caffeine, whether it's nootropics, whether it's alcohol...

02:44:48.000 Nicotine.

02:44:49.000 Yeah, sure.

02:44:50.000 Whether it's marijuana, there's an effect.

02:44:52.000 And when that effect happens, there's a cascade of effects.

02:44:56.000 The effect of marijuana, there's a lot of different effects.

02:45:00.000 But one of them is your creativity absolutely gets a kickstart.

02:45:05.000 Something happens.

02:45:06.000 You get a weird way of looking at things.

02:45:08.000 You get a strange, altered perspective on things.

02:45:12.000 Alcohol does the same.

02:45:13.000 It gives you a strange altered perspective on things.

02:45:16.000 You know, it does it in a douchier way, makes you a little louder, makes you a little bolder, releases inhibitions.

02:45:22.000 But occasionally someone will write something while on alcohol that is just brilliant. 0.97

02:45:28.000 And it comes out of this don't give a fuck thing that alcohol allows you to look at something from a different angle. 0.93

02:45:34.000 Or maybe it drops your inhibitions and you're able to be more yourself in some instances. 0.98

02:45:42.000 It's also a possibility that it's a combination of those things.

02:45:45.000 That they're not individual.

02:45:47.000 That there's not an either or.

02:45:49.000 That they're all a part of most things in life.

02:45:54.000 Maybe it quiets down one part of the brain.

02:45:57.000 They're not mutually exclusive.

02:46:00.000 Yeah, I mean, listen, man, we're learning more and more about science, brain science all the time.

02:46:04.000 It just shows you not to be too orthodox in your thinking and certainly not too judgmental in your thinking.

02:46:09.000 You know what else, too, that I think is very important and I've monitored in my own life?

02:46:15.000 I don't have a problem with depression, but I do have days where I feel better and days where I don't feel as good.

02:46:22.000 And a lot of that is dictated by how I choose to think.

02:46:26.000 A lot of that is dictated by how I manage my life, whether I'm happy with things that I'm doing, and how I choose to pursue my thinking.

02:46:36.000 You know, and I think there's a certain amount of what that is that makes you feel happy and makes you feel sad that is manageable.

02:46:44.000 And I think, too, there's definitely a danger in putting it all on a disease and all on a pill.

02:46:51.000 And for some people, it most certainly is a disease.

02:46:54.000 But there are people that have some wiggle room in their life, and they can turn their life into a much more positive experience for themselves if they just choose to manage it correctly.

02:47:05.000 This is not...

02:47:07.000 Excluding people that have a legit medical condition and have legit medical depression and some sort of a chemical imbalance.

02:47:14.000 Not at all.

02:47:15.000 But I'm saying there's a lot of us that aren't depressed, like me, that you can manipulate the way your mind feels.

02:47:22.000 You can manipulate the way your view of the earth is.

02:47:27.000 What you choose to focus on.

02:47:28.000 Yeah.

02:47:29.000 You know, that's 100% true.

02:47:30.000 You know, I always think about that.

02:47:33.000 How you manage what you choose to think about and the perspective that you take.

02:47:38.000 My God, they've done, you know, anxiety.

02:47:41.000 Behavioral psychologists used to always say, you've got to get rid of your anxiety.

02:47:44.000 And now what they say is, if you think of anxiety in terms of just your body getting ready for action, As opposed to, oh no, this anxiety is going to kill me, your blood vessels look very differently.

02:47:57.000 So how you view your own anxiety and the attitude you take, your blood vessels will either constrict, which is not good, but if you look at anxiety as, here I go, my body's getting ready for this, I'm getting ready.

02:48:08.000 Your blood vessels and your heart looks exactly the way it does in moments of joy and courage. 0.96

02:48:14.000 And that's from a fucking great TED Talk story. 0.97

02:48:17.000 Again, I can't remember. 0.98

02:48:18.000 I wish I could tell some people could watch it, but really interesting.

02:48:21.000 How you look, how you choose to think about your own anxiety has everything to do with whether it's healthy for you or bad for you.

02:48:31.000 And if you choose to think about anxiety in the right way, there's a lot of evidence, measurable evidence, based on a study that followed, I think, 30,000 Americans over nine years, that suggests that it actually can be good for you.

02:48:46.000 That makes sense if you think about it because you're shifting what it is and what it becomes is energy.

02:48:51.000 Yes.

02:48:51.000 And like, just like, oh, I got this anxiety, but you know what?

02:48:53.000 This is a growth moment.

02:48:55.000 This is important.

02:48:56.000 This means we're getting something done.

02:48:58.000 Something is happening.

02:48:59.000 Yes.

02:48:59.000 And concentrate on it like that.

02:49:00.000 You used to say that.

02:49:01.000 You used to always say, I like those moments where I'm not sure what's going to happen next.

02:49:05.000 Yeah, I do.

02:49:06.000 Very important. 0.98

02:49:07.000 Fucking important. 0.90

02:49:08.000 I like them a little too much, though. 0.98

02:49:09.000 It's called adventure.

02:49:10.000 It's called adventure.

02:49:11.000 Adventure.

02:49:12.000 It is.

02:49:13.000 That's my nickname.

02:49:13.000 Adventure is not knowing what's going to happen next.

02:49:15.000 What I like to do is run the podcast out to the last five minutes like we're at right now and wonder when the tape's going to run out. 0.99

02:49:21.000 Damn. 0.98

02:49:22.000 Why does it last only three hours? 1.00

02:49:23.000 It's fucking Ustream. 0.99

02:49:25.000 If we had the balls to switch over to YouTube or Twitch... 1.00

02:49:30.000 Three hours is a long time. 0.96

02:49:31.000 Yeah, it's enough.

02:49:32.000 It seems like a good number.

02:49:33.000 People get mad now when I do two.

02:49:35.000 I did two hours yesterday with Ronda Rousey.

02:49:37.000 People were complaining.

02:49:37.000 They wanted more.

02:49:38.000 They called me a lazy, do-nothing bitch. 1.00

02:49:40.000 Jesus, those bastards. 1.00

02:49:41.000 They called me a do-nothing bitch. 1.00

02:49:43.000 How dare you? 0.99

02:49:44.000 I don't read any of my comments.

02:49:46.000 Well, it's dangerous. 0.95

02:49:48.000 I heard a comic friend when I was talking shit about me and Brennan. 0.97

02:49:50.000 I thought it was... 0.98

02:49:51.000 Who?

02:49:52.000 Say his name!

02:49:53.000 Don't.

02:49:54.000 We'll do it.

02:49:54.000 We'll talk about it afterwards.

02:49:55.000 But it was surprising.

02:49:56.000 He's like a young guy I like.

02:49:58.000 He might have been misconstrued.

02:50:01.000 Yeah, it might have been misconstrued.

02:50:02.000 Who knows. 1.00

02:50:02.000 Or he might be a jealous bitch. 1.00

02:50:03.000 He was mad. 1.00

02:50:04.000 Might be sad.

02:50:05.000 Might not be happy.

02:50:06.000 I like him.

02:50:06.000 I feel bad.

02:50:07.000 Might not get middle-aged.

02:50:08.000 Maybe you misgendered him with the wrong pronoun.

02:50:12.000 Try Z. Hey! 0.70

02:50:13.000 Ladies, gentlemen, and zeers.

02:50:15.000 Here.

02:50:16.000 You can call them here.

02:50:17.000 They're teaching new pronouns.

02:50:18.000 September 23rd, come see me and Joe.

02:50:21.000 September 22nd, come see me and Joe.

02:50:23.000 September 23rd, come see me and Joe at the Hong Kong Inn at 8 o'clock and 10 o'clock.

02:50:28.000 We had an 8 o'clock show just now.

02:50:29.000 Yeah, but where can they buy the tickets for that?

02:50:31.000 Do we know?

02:50:32.000 We haven't even advertised it anywhere.

02:50:33.000 Yeah, just go to the Hong Kong Inn.

02:50:34.000 Yeah, it's hongkonginn.com.

02:50:37.000 Yeah.

02:50:37.000 Yeah, the Ice House tickets are not on sale yet, either.

02:50:40.000 But hawkongend.com, you can buy.

02:50:42.000 They'll sell out immediately.

02:50:43.000 Yeah, and this Friday, I'm at the Ka Theater.

02:50:46.000 If you go into the UFC in Vegas, I'm at the Ka Theater on Friday night with Greg Fitzsimmons and Ian Edwards.

02:50:51.000 Love both those guys. 0.99

02:50:52.000 Big time fun, you fucks. 0.98

02:50:54.000 I'm at the San Jose Improv September 25th, 26th, 27th. 0.99

02:50:58.000 One of my favorite places ever.

02:50:59.000 That was a beautiful place.

02:51:01.000 I can't wait.

02:51:01.000 I've only done it once a long time ago.

02:51:02.000 It's a theater.

02:51:03.000 It was an old-time theater theater.

02:51:05.000 Yeah.

02:51:05.000 And they converted it into a comedy club.

02:51:07.000 It's beautiful.

02:51:08.000 It's one of the best improvs in the country.

02:51:09.000 Yeah, it's awesome.

02:51:10.000 Awesome people.

02:51:11.000 I can't wait to do it. 1.00

02:51:11.000 All right, you fuckers. 1.00

02:51:13.000 Thank you very much, everybody. 0.99

02:51:14.000 Much love.

02:51:15.000 Love you all.

02:51:16.000 Peace!

02:51:17.000 Bye-bye.

The Joe Rogan Experience - September 01, 2015

Joe Rogan Experience #691 - Bryan Callen

Episode Stats

Summary

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