The Joe Rogan Experience - December 16, 2015


Joe Rogan Experience #738 - Molly Crabapple


Episode Stats

Length

2 hours and 12 minutes

Words per Minute

188.99168

Word Count

24,991

Sentence Count

1,824

Misogynist Sentences

71

Hate Speech Sentences

64


Summary

On this episode of Thick & Thin, I sit down with writer and editor-in-chief of The New York Times Magazine, Alex Blumberg, to talk about his new book, The Name Dropper, and how he came to write it. We talk about the process of writing the book, how he got the idea for it, and what it's like to be a writer in the public eye when you don't really know what you're writing about. And we talk a lot about drugs, which is a big deal because Alex has a lot of them, and why he writes about them so much. It's a really good episode, and I hope you enjoy it. Thank you so much to Alex for being on the show, and thank you for being brave enough to share it with the world. I really appreciate it. And I really hope that you enjoy this episode, because it's a good one, and that you'll find something in it that makes you think about it and reflect on it in a way that you can relate to it. I hope that it makes you reflect on your own life, because that's what we're all here to do, because we're here for you to do the same. And that's why we should all do that, right? We're here to help you do it, right here, right now, right in front of you, in this moment, right across the screen, and in the real world, right next to you. And we'll talk about it, in real life, and we'll all of it, so you can do it right here. . and we can do the next one, too. , right here in the next episode, next week, next Wednesday, next Monday, next Tuesday, next Friday, next Saturday, the next day, the day after next week. Thank you for listening to us, folks. We'll see you next week! xoxo, Alex. -P.S. -Jon Sorrentino -Jon & Alex <3 -Jon Jon - Tom Sarah Tom - Steve Thanks, Jon John Jake Ben Kevin Mike Caitie Joe Michael Matt Evan Matthew Tim Brian David Daniel Sam Julian


Transcript

00:00:00.000 Dude, I'm so happy to be here.
00:00:01.000 Dude, I'm so happy you're here.
00:00:02.000 I've been reading your book, and it's fucking excellent.
00:00:05.000 You're a really good writer.
00:00:06.000 Thank you so much.
00:00:07.000 I killed myself doing that book.
00:00:09.000 That is the hardest thing I've ever done in my life.
00:00:11.000 How long did it take?
00:00:12.000 About two years.
00:00:13.000 Wow.
00:00:14.000 And when I got the deal, I had this delusional idea that it would be like writing 25,000-word essays, and this was so wrong.
00:00:21.000 This was so, so, so much harder than anything I'd ever done.
00:00:25.000 Why was it so much harder than writing essays?
00:00:27.000 Well, when you write essays, you are doing, like, these kind of short things.
00:00:31.000 It's limited.
00:00:31.000 You have a beginning, a middle, and an end.
00:00:33.000 No characters, no dialogue, you know, simple narrative.
00:00:36.000 Whereas this man, like, keeping a plot together over 300 pages, and then that plot is your life, which by definition has no plot.
00:00:45.000 Right.
00:00:46.000 Oh, that makes sense.
00:00:47.000 Yeah.
00:00:47.000 Was it hard to recall all the moments in your life and do them justice?
00:00:51.000 So hard.
00:00:52.000 And also for this book, because I work as a journalist, I fact-checked it as best I could.
00:00:57.000 And nothing is more personally painful than fact-checking the ends of various friendships and relationships and realizing what a jerk you were at the time.
00:01:06.000 Yeah, I can only imagine.
00:01:08.000 Yeah, I don't want to do that.
00:01:10.000 Like, oh man, I had a whole victimization narrative, and oh, that was quite wrong.
00:01:15.000 I think they probably did too.
00:01:17.000 Everybody does.
00:01:18.000 I mean, it's really strange when you go back and talk to people that you haven't talked to for a long time, and you're like, okay, what is your...
00:01:26.000 And all judgments aside, let's just give me your version of what happened, and I'll tell you what I think happened.
00:01:32.000 And you're like, oh my god, I don't know what the fuck the truth is anymore.
00:01:36.000 Yeah, I have this one thing where there was this one girl, she recalled something, and she recalled it one way, and then when she realized that it was actually two days later than she thought it was, which made it look like there was an article she had written which had contradicted it, she kept insisting it hadn't happened.
00:01:52.000 And I was like, man, here's your Twitter, here's my Twitter, here's the Twitter of the two other people who are at brunch, here's the email confirming it.
00:01:58.000 It happened on this day.
00:01:59.000 And finally she was like, I just give up.
00:02:01.000 I give up, but I don't remember it.
00:02:04.000 Yeah, it's very strange when people are confronted by that fact, too.
00:02:10.000 I had a friend that I'm no longer friends with that insisted something, and then when my other friend jumped in and said, that's not what happened at all, it was a psychedelic drug talk.
00:02:20.000 I'm trying to beat around the bush like I'm on regular radio or something.
00:02:23.000 But he was insisting that he got me on this psychedelic drug the first time, and my other friend was like, um, no.
00:02:31.000 That was mine.
00:02:33.000 It was my drugs.
00:02:34.000 I was there.
00:02:35.000 Like, what are you talking about, man?
00:02:36.000 And then he just sort of stopped talking to us.
00:02:38.000 Yeah, that kind of sulked off and then comes back later with a new subject.
00:02:42.000 Well, people love to, you know, they love somehow or another to get glory from the past.
00:02:47.000 And like, somehow or another, it's one of those things that never works, sort of like name dropping.
00:02:52.000 Like, name dropping has never worked ever.
00:02:54.000 No one has ever said, I'm really good friends with Leonardo DiCaprio.
00:02:58.000 And someone's gone, Whoa!
00:02:59.000 Let me give you a movie now!
00:03:01.000 You're fucking amazing!
00:03:02.000 No, immediately people go, oh, this guy's a name dropper.
00:03:06.000 Or he just happens to say it and it happens to be true.
00:03:09.000 There's a fine line, but everybody knows what the difference is.
00:03:13.000 When you're a name dropper, you can smell it in a sentence.
00:03:17.000 It's just like it comes off in the air.
00:03:20.000 So this book, it's fucking super intimate.
00:03:24.000 You just cut the skin away and opened your chest up and the whole world could see your soul.
00:03:32.000 You know, you peeled it out.
00:03:33.000 I tried my best.
00:03:34.000 I mean, I just wanted to do something honest, you know?
00:03:37.000 Well, it's definitely that, I guess.
00:03:39.000 I mean, I don't know.
00:03:39.000 I wasn't there, obviously.
00:03:42.000 Two years is a long time to write something.
00:03:45.000 How many times did you have to go back over it?
00:03:48.000 Oh god, like seven drafts?
00:03:50.000 And there's a hundred pages of cuts from this book, too, that's in another word file that I might mine someday for other essays.
00:03:57.000 But it was like over and over.
00:04:00.000 And you know, because I had never written a book before, I didn't, I didn't realize, you know, how much extra you write.
00:04:08.000 I feel like I was like building a block of marble basically out of words.
00:04:11.000 And then I had to like cut away at the horrible, ugly block of marble I had made and then finally something cool emerged.
00:04:16.000 Yeah, they all say that.
00:04:18.000 All the great writers say that.
00:04:19.000 Like my friend Steve Rinell always uses this quote, you have to kill your babies.
00:04:23.000 Yeah, exactly.
00:04:24.000 That's what they say, right?
00:04:25.000 That's like the common writer's conversation, kill your babies.
00:04:28.000 But then you can keep your babies in another document and you can devote like one essay per baby where they make sense.
00:04:33.000 That's similar to stand-up comedy in a lot of ways.
00:04:36.000 One of the hardest things about comedy is recognizing a bit sometimes is just too fat.
00:04:43.000 There's too much stuff in it, and you have to figure out what to chop off.
00:04:46.000 But you have these emotional connections to these punchlines.
00:04:49.000 Like, but I love this part.
00:04:50.000 I love saying it.
00:04:51.000 This is my favorite part, but that favorite part doesn't necessarily enhance the whole thing, so you have to kind of chip it away, and then the whole thing will be better without it, but it's hard to do, right?
00:05:02.000 Oh, God.
00:05:03.000 I mean, the best piece of advice I ever got when I started writing was my friend Lori, who's a really cool journalist, said to me, the worst articles I've ever written are the ones where I try to say everything about a subject.
00:05:15.000 That makes sense.
00:05:16.000 Yeah.
00:05:17.000 Well, your style is really interesting, too, because one of the things that's really cool is you've got a lot of illustrations that go along with these stories.
00:05:27.000 Now, are these illustrations that you added in after the fact, or are they illustrations that you sort of drew while you were experiencing these things?
00:05:35.000 A few of them I drew at the time.
00:05:37.000 There are some old illustrations from Turkey or from Paris that I did when I was a teenager.
00:05:41.000 Some stuff from Occupy.
00:05:43.000 But I would say over a hundred of them I did new for the book.
00:05:46.000 Oh wow.
00:05:47.000 So that's a lot of extra work on top of that as well.
00:05:50.000 Oh my god.
00:05:50.000 How many days were you doing this every day?
00:05:53.000 How were you finding the time?
00:05:55.000 Because I know you're so busy doing journalism.
00:05:57.000 You're busy doing art.
00:05:58.000 How did you find the time to do this?
00:06:01.000 I was a really horrible person to be around for quite a few months.
00:06:05.000 I have the coolest boyfriend in the world.
00:06:07.000 Thank you, Fred, for putting up with me during this.
00:06:09.000 Powerful Fred.
00:06:10.000 Fred is awesome.
00:06:12.000 I had a few things.
00:06:14.000 First, I had friends with a house in the country and they let me stay there for a number of weeks and they didn't have internet signal in a lot of it.
00:06:21.000 So I didn't bring any of my fun books that I like to read.
00:06:23.000 So I was just stuck.
00:06:24.000 It was just me and this fucking thing and we're gonna beat each other.
00:06:27.000 I rented a lot of hotel rooms.
00:06:29.000 I had an editor who put a beatdown on me and was like, you can't keep going off to other countries.
00:06:35.000 You actually have to write this book that I contracted you for.
00:06:38.000 At one point, he was like, are you fleeing to Warzone so you don't have to look at your book contract?
00:06:43.000 Is that how it's going?
00:06:44.000 I think towards the end, I... Didn't do anything but work on it.
00:06:51.000 I just became this horrible, like, troll beast that didn't wash her hair and would growl at anyone who came near living entirely on coffee and just made it.
00:07:00.000 That was how I did it.
00:07:00.000 That is a good way to do it, right?
00:07:02.000 If you can get somewhere without the internet?
00:07:04.000 Yeah.
00:07:04.000 I used to write a lot on airplanes.
00:07:06.000 I used to look forward to airplane flights.
00:07:08.000 I'd be like, okay, I'm stuck in this seat.
00:07:10.000 There's no internet access.
00:07:12.000 And then what the fuck do the airlines do?
00:07:14.000 They put internet on the goddamn planes!
00:07:16.000 I know, and then you're like, oh, I need to see what someone says about me on Twitter.
00:07:20.000 Oh, no, someone was wrong on Twitter.
00:07:21.000 I must remedy this.
00:07:22.000 Yeah, I'm going to go on Amazon and buy a new pair of sneakers, you know?
00:07:25.000 Exactly.
00:07:26.000 It's so easy to just get distracted nowadays.
00:07:29.000 It's just the world is becoming more and more available, you know?
00:07:33.000 And if you're off in a cabin in the woods with no internet access...
00:07:38.000 Yeah, you're stuck.
00:07:40.000 You're confronted with your own work to do.
00:07:42.000 Yeah, it's so attractive.
00:07:44.000 That's such an attractive...
00:07:45.000 Idea.
00:07:46.000 It's so romantic, right?
00:07:48.000 To be off in a cabin in the woods by yourself, working on your great work.
00:07:52.000 Except whenever I'm actually there, I want to, like, dig holes in my arms because I'm like, where is the Wi-Fi signal?
00:07:59.000 There's a guy that I tweeted about today.
00:08:02.000 There's an article that I tweeted where this guy decided he wanted to live by himself in the, I think it was in Northwest Territories.
00:08:11.000 He was going to do it for a solid year.
00:08:13.000 But he made it six months, and then he had a satellite phone.
00:08:16.000 He's like, come get me!
00:08:16.000 I can't fucking do this anymore!
00:08:17.000 But he was just going crazy, like, by himself for six months.
00:08:21.000 And it's a fascinating story.
00:08:23.000 This is the guy right here.
00:08:24.000 Norwegian adventurer spent six months alone in the Northwest Territory wilderness.
00:08:29.000 And it's really cool because the guy is very good at describing what he felt and what it was like and what he expected versus what it was really like.
00:08:39.000 One of the things that he said that I thought was really interesting, he said, we are not meant to be alone.
00:08:43.000 And I kind of feel that way too.
00:08:45.000 I feel like, you know, people romanticize this idea of being this hermit that's off in the woods, you know, the The the monk that's out meditating in the forest by himself, but that shit is like it's like holding your breath It's kind of cool for a little while, but you don't you don't want to do it very long No,
00:09:02.000 man, I think I mean it makes you go crazy like being in solitary things makes you go crazy I Recently did a really big investigative piece on some long-term solitary prisoners and these guys like were really smart guys they were You know,
00:09:18.000 really strong guys, in my opinion.
00:09:21.000 Like, one of them I consider really a genius.
00:09:23.000 But he had been in solitary for 14 years, man.
00:09:26.000 14 years.
00:09:29.000 Who is this?
00:09:30.000 His name is Andre Jacobs.
00:09:31.000 He was part of this group of whistleblowers called the Dallas Six that basically they were giving information about guards doing, beating people up and being racist in this prison in PA. And they're all in solitary and the guards retaliated.
00:09:48.000 And then when one of the other guys, Carrington, sued the DA for not protecting him from the guards, Yeah, I agree.
00:10:11.000 Yeah.
00:10:11.000 That's hilarious.
00:10:12.000 They called it rioting.
00:10:13.000 So I did an investigative piece, and eventually I got video and stuff, and it was bullshit, and I really hope their trial goes well in February.
00:10:22.000 But as part of it, I spent a lot of time talking to two of the guys, and I mean, you suffer real mental trauma from doing that.
00:10:31.000 And no one, even the smartest, toughest, best person who has a really loving mom that is really devoted to giving them all the books and all the support, even that person will suffer real trauma from that.
00:10:44.000 Yeah, I've always wondered, like when Bradley Manning was arrested and then later became Chelsea Manning and spent, how many years was she, you know, whenever the transition makes sense, how many years was she in solitary?
00:11:00.000 Like it was quite a long time.
00:11:02.000 Like three years, I think, right?
00:11:03.000 And naked.
00:11:04.000 Yeah.
00:11:04.000 Naked and in cold conditions.
00:11:07.000 Like they literally tortured her.
00:11:11.000 Like they tortured her.
00:11:13.000 Like, what they decided, when do you say her and when is him?
00:11:17.000 Because when did she decide to transition?
00:11:19.000 When she was in there, right?
00:11:20.000 She, like, announced the transition right after her trial.
00:11:24.000 But she, I mean, if you look at her chat logs with Adrienne Lamo, she has one line where she says that what she's afraid of is being known to the world as a boy.
00:11:32.000 So I think she decided it herself a long time ago.
00:11:36.000 Before she was arrested?
00:11:37.000 Yeah, before she was arrested.
00:11:38.000 But she just didn't publicly announce it for a long time.
00:11:41.000 That is crazy.
00:11:42.000 The worst thing is to be known as a boy.
00:11:45.000 Yeah.
00:11:45.000 Whoa.
00:11:46.000 Yeah, it was a line from the chat log.
00:11:47.000 And anyone who's listening to this, please fact check it.
00:11:50.000 I don't want to get it wrong, but that's what I remember.
00:11:52.000 Right.
00:11:52.000 But I remember thinking, like, who wouldn't lose their fucking mind being naked in a room by yourself for years?
00:12:00.000 Like, what if they thought that she was a hazard to herself or something like that?
00:12:05.000 Yeah, their bullshit excuse is always like, oh, you're a suicide risk, so we have to have you naked with no glasses, nothing to read, a horrible, like, suicide prevention blanket that you can't, like, you know, wrap around you, and just, we have to, like, torture you because you might be a suicide risk.
00:12:23.000 Is she in regular prison now or still in solitary?
00:12:27.000 She's in regular prison right now.
00:12:29.000 Actually, one of my most cherished possessions in the universe is she wrote me a letter once because I drew a birthday card for her.
00:12:35.000 She dots her eyes with little doves.
00:12:37.000 It's really cute.
00:12:38.000 With doves?
00:12:39.000 Yeah, she draws little doves on them.
00:12:40.000 Every eye?
00:12:41.000 Yeah.
00:12:42.000 I hope this isn't a long letter.
00:12:43.000 No, it was a short one.
00:12:44.000 It was a gracious one.
00:12:45.000 I think it reminded me of the thank you card that someone very graciously writes, someone who's given them a gift.
00:12:50.000 What a bizarre set of circumstances.
00:12:53.000 Someone who is a soldier who transitioned to becoming a woman and then sends letters that all have the animal that's known as the symbol of peace over all the eyes.
00:13:04.000 I mean, I think from her life you get the sense that part of the reason she wanted to join the army was she's just like so smart and she just wanted to go to college.
00:13:13.000 I mean, from what I know kind of about reading her life story, like this was someone who Like her happiest time was like dating a dude who was around sort of like the MIT hacker scene and I think that if she was middle class and not poor she just would have like gone to school and gotten a computer science degree and that would have been the whole thing.
00:13:31.000 It's incredible that someone who exposes crimes, and that's the only way you could look at what happened with Edward Snowden and with Bradley Manning.
00:13:39.000 I mean, you could say that what they did was treasonous.
00:13:42.000 Is it really treasonous when you're exposing crime?
00:13:45.000 Like, isn't it supposed to be illegal to commit crime?
00:13:47.000 And if your government is doing things that are illegal, isn't it your job as a patriot to expose those things?
00:13:54.000 Like, when is it not treasonous?
00:13:56.000 Oh, God, yeah.
00:13:57.000 I mean, both of them are heroes.
00:14:00.000 If no one is putting their own government in check, then that government will just tend to concentrating more and more power and people in it will concentrate to doing worse and worse things because there's no sort of supervision.
00:14:13.000 And there's no way that you can love your country and not call it on its bullshit at all.
00:14:16.000 I think that the opposite thing is treason.
00:14:18.000 I think it's treason to say, like, just because it's my country, any crime is justified.
00:14:23.000 Right.
00:14:23.000 But what they're doing, though, is so horrible because they're making it so that no one ever does anything like this again.
00:14:29.000 They make such a giant example.
00:14:31.000 Julian Assange is literally going crazy, staying in that one house in London.
00:14:38.000 He can't leave.
00:14:39.000 If he leaves, they'll arrest him the moment he steps foot on the...
00:14:42.000 What a crazy thing.
00:14:44.000 He can get out on the balcony and wave to people and get a slight amount of vitamin D and then he has to go back inside and he's fucking trapped.
00:14:52.000 Snowden is hanging out with Putin in Russia, which is just bizarre to me.
00:14:56.000 So strange.
00:14:57.000 I watched a bizarre Putin video today.
00:15:00.000 Which Putin video did you watch?
00:15:02.000 It's Putin.
00:15:02.000 They're analyzing his gait.
00:15:04.000 The way he walks.
00:15:05.000 This is so creepy.
00:15:07.000 Why don't they just admit that they have a crush on him and want to have a sleepover?
00:15:10.000 That is so weird.
00:15:11.000 I mean...
00:15:13.000 Well, it's because he has a very specific way of walking that's indicative of someone who has military training.
00:15:19.000 It's called the Gunslinger's Gate.
00:15:21.000 Did they make that term up themselves?
00:15:24.000 I guess they probably did.
00:15:25.000 But what he does is he swings his left arm, but not his right, so he could pull his gun out really quickly.
00:15:31.000 That's the idea.
00:15:32.000 But what's really bizarre about the video is I didn't know how, like, opulent...
00:15:37.000 Wherever he is with palace or whatever the fuck it is like they have these fucking enormous like here it is Look at these enormous gold doors Like let's play it.
00:15:47.000 Let's play it Jamie so you can watch this like if you watch as he walks if you notice his left arm swings notably while his right arm stays Relatively still in comparison like a huge contrast and he always does this and that's so that he could shoot you in the fucking head quicker Or else someone finds out there's an untreated rotator cuff injury,
00:16:10.000 one or the other.
00:16:11.000 That's true, right?
00:16:12.000 We're just like looking way too into it.
00:16:14.000 But apparently it's really common amongst these guys in the Russian military that move into some form of political power.
00:16:25.000 But what's kind of creepiest about it, back it up to the beginning again, Jamie, please?
00:16:29.000 What's creepiest about it is look at those fucking doors!
00:16:33.000 Like, what is that?
00:16:34.000 Like, what are those goddamn doors?
00:16:36.000 Look at all that gold!
00:16:38.000 Everything's gold!
00:16:40.000 I mean, I guess that's the vestiges of being an imperial power where people used to collect Fabergé eggs.
00:16:46.000 Yeah, he is.
00:16:47.000 I mean, he is one of the most open dictators that you can see in modern society, which is supposed to be some sort of a democracy.
00:16:59.000 Entirely familiar with how the Russians run their political system But I know that he was out and then he was you know He put some other guy in some sort of a puppet position and now he's back running the whole show But it's it's he's a weird case man.
00:17:13.000 I don't know how he manages it It seems like guys like that someone always wants to kill them and just it always falls apart But he's managed to keep it together for a long long long time No, he is.
00:17:25.000 I mean, I can't say I'm like super familiar with Russian politics.
00:17:28.000 So I could, I might be talking bullshit.
00:17:31.000 But I mean, he, you know, he was the ex head of the KGB, like he seems incredibly versed in spying on people and killing people who are threats and maintaining his position at all costs.
00:17:43.000 Yeah, he doesn't just kill him.
00:17:44.000 He kills him, like, openly.
00:17:46.000 Yeah, he has him gunned down.
00:17:47.000 In front of their girlfriend and stuff like that.
00:17:49.000 Like, he's just, it's just a massive terror tactic.
00:17:52.000 There was that one guy that was, yeah, he was walking with his girlfriend and his thought was that he had become so famous from criticizing him that Putin couldn't kill him because if he did, it would be so obvious.
00:18:03.000 Nope.
00:18:04.000 No, he doesn't care.
00:18:05.000 I mean, I always think about there is a very respected journalist whose last name I won't pronounce because I'll butcher it.
00:18:12.000 But yeah, she was also just like gunned down for criticizing him.
00:18:16.000 Yeah, well, that's kind of happened, theoretically at least, in other places.
00:18:23.000 But one of the weird ones in America was that Michael Hastings guy.
00:18:27.000 That guy.
00:18:28.000 That's still, that one really freaks me out to this day.
00:18:31.000 Because if you don't know the story, Michael Hastings was, there's actually a TED Talk That's available right now.
00:18:38.000 It's a podcast called the TED Radio Hour, which I listen to all the time, that had one episode called Disruptive Leadership and actually focused on this general, General McAllister.
00:18:51.000 And they were kind of sympathetic to him in this TED Talk because the idea was that he did a real leadership thing by stepping down.
00:19:01.000 And what it was was Michael Hastings had gotten embedded in this military Yeah.
00:19:29.000 And as he got closer and closer to these people, they got more and more relaxed and they started telling jokes that were inappropriate about like Al Gore or Joseph Biden.
00:19:39.000 And along the lines, this guy, Michael Hastings, formulated this article, published it in Rolling Stone, and it became this sort of a national scandal.
00:19:53.000 I believe his name is McAllister, right?
00:19:55.000 Is that his name?
00:19:56.000 He was forced to step down.
00:19:59.000 And that's what the whole focus of this TED Radio Hour was about, was this guy taking a leadership position, a leadership point of view by deciding that his position was not as important as the cause itself, and he was just going to step down because he had created...
00:20:15.000 This environment where it was too much controversy.
00:20:18.000 And he was upset that President Obama didn't ask him to stay, but it is what it is, and that's it.
00:20:23.000 But what they don't say in this thing was this Michael Hastings guy who was in this recording, who was talking about what it was like when he was there, and he committed suicide in one of the strangest, most controversial ways ever.
00:20:37.000 I mean, I don't think it was a suicide.
00:20:39.000 I think it was an accident.
00:20:40.000 Well, some people think it was a suicide, some people think it was an accident, and the black helicopter crew thinks that he was murdered, and that what they did is they took over the electronics in his Mercedes, and they forced his car to drive right into a tree at 120 miles an hour with no brakes.
00:20:58.000 Explode and Let me there's all this crazy all these crazy conspiracy theories that are attached to it that say that engines don't go flying from a car like that unless there's a bomb Involved and you know like why would this guy do this and it is pretty pretty trippy stuff and then there was claims that there was crystal meth in his system and then he was you know high on drugs and he had A problem with drugs in the past,
00:21:24.000 but then the counter to that was people were like, well, no, he's probably doing Adderall, which a lot of writers do, because it helps him write.
00:21:30.000 Yeah, it's like the New York drug.
00:21:31.000 Everyone's on Adderall in New York.
00:21:33.000 Is it?
00:21:34.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:21:35.000 I mean, I know a lot of people who are very close to Michael Hastings, and I will say the people that I know that are very close to him think it was a tragic accident.
00:21:44.000 He just happened to be going 120 miles an hour on Sunset Boulevard?
00:21:48.000 Yeah, I mean, that's for the people I know that, you know...
00:21:51.000 They never hit his brakes?
00:21:54.000 I can't debate it, but that's just what I've heard from people who I'm very close to, who are close to him.
00:21:59.000 Yeah, I would say that, too.
00:22:00.000 If I was close to that dude, I knew I was on some sort of a list.
00:22:03.000 If you're close to that guy, you know, you've got to be on a list, right?
00:22:07.000 Oh, my God.
00:22:07.000 Well, I mean, probably, like, if you're an investigative journalist doing a lot of stuff in Iraq and Somalia, you're probably on a list.
00:22:13.000 You talking about yourself?
00:22:14.000 I haven't done Somalia stuff.
00:22:16.000 No, I mean, but, like, a lot of his friends were investigative journalists.
00:22:18.000 Oh, yeah.
00:22:19.000 I'm sure everybody's...
00:22:20.000 I'm probably on a list.
00:22:22.000 Probably on a list for having you right here.
00:22:26.000 Dude!
00:22:26.000 I'm in California.
00:22:27.000 I don't know.
00:22:28.000 I'm adopting the native dialect.
00:22:32.000 I'm sure we're all on lists, because how could you be interesting if you're not on a list?
00:22:36.000 That's true.
00:22:36.000 It's sort of like a badge of courage to be on some sort of a list.
00:22:39.000 Depends on what list, though.
00:22:43.000 Yeah, it's a weird world we live in right now.
00:22:45.000 I think there's a temporary bridge right now that's going on where, whether it's the NSA, fill in the blank with whatever name of whatever organization that's supposedly watching over us, but they have a certain amount of power to look into people that we don't have yet.
00:23:03.000 That's temporary.
00:23:05.000 There's going to come a time where this electronic barrier that we have in between each other, it's all going to dissolve.
00:23:11.000 And everyone's going to have the same sort of power to spy on everybody that the NSA has.
00:23:16.000 We're just going to have to accept it.
00:23:17.000 It's going to be very strict.
00:23:18.000 It's going to be like we're all camping.
00:23:20.000 Oh God, it's going to be a horrifying world.
00:23:22.000 We already know too much about each other.
00:23:24.000 We do, right?
00:23:25.000 Was that a concern when you were writing this book?
00:23:28.000 Because you empty yourself out in this book.
00:23:31.000 I mean, you talk about sexual liaisons and relationships and friendships and things gone wrong.
00:23:38.000 When you were writing this, did you ever say, man, maybe I don't want everybody to know these things?
00:23:46.000 I had a few things that were like that, usually actually with friendships, but ultimately I thought that it was more important to be honest.
00:23:54.000 Though the one thing that I did do was I felt like it would have been really unfair if I had taken kind of personal moments I had with someone like 15 years ago.
00:24:04.000 And just like put them in a book and thus on that person's Google results without asking them.
00:24:09.000 So while I tried to be pretty merciless with myself, with people who I'm still friends with, I got their approval on what I wrote about them.
00:24:16.000 Oh, that's really cool.
00:24:17.000 That's really important.
00:24:19.000 That would be a real good way to destroy a friendship.
00:24:21.000 You started telling crazy, intimate stories about someone.
00:24:25.000 Yeah, just not cool.
00:24:26.000 It's not fair.
00:24:28.000 And I know that a lot of people disagree with that and they're like, they're my memories.
00:24:32.000 But I don't know.
00:24:33.000 I don't think it's right, especially if you're kind of the more famous one.
00:24:36.000 Not cool.
00:24:37.000 Yeah, well, saying they're my memories.
00:24:39.000 But if you share a moment with someone, I think it's kind of a group memory, or at least a group moment.
00:24:46.000 Yeah, it's kind of collectively owned.
00:24:48.000 And I ran them by my parents also.
00:24:50.000 That's got to be weird.
00:24:52.000 That was the most terrifying thing.
00:24:55.000 Because I ran the parts about my parents by them, but then they hadn't read the whole book.
00:25:00.000 And I had this really terrifying thing when the book came out where I was like...
00:25:05.000 Oh my god, what are they gonna think?
00:25:07.000 I mean, I love my parents.
00:25:08.000 I have a really supportive relationship.
00:25:09.000 I couldn't ask for like You know, two cooler people on earth, you know, my parents.
00:25:13.000 But still, you're always scared, right?
00:25:15.000 It's scary to show yourself like that.
00:25:18.000 But they liked it.
00:25:19.000 They liked it mostly.
00:25:20.000 So I'm very happy about that.
00:25:22.000 Well, you must have really open-minded parents.
00:25:23.000 I do.
00:25:24.000 What do your parents do?
00:25:25.000 My mom, she used to be an illustrator.
00:25:27.000 Now she's mostly retired.
00:25:28.000 She works kind of as a babysitter slash cat sitter now.
00:25:31.000 And my dad's an academic.
00:25:33.000 Oh, that's cool.
00:25:34.000 Well, so yeah, you obviously have some intelligent, open-minded parents.
00:25:38.000 So they've got to be really proud of you because this is excellent stuff.
00:25:40.000 Thank you so much.
00:25:41.000 Yeah, they really are.
00:25:43.000 And it was cool because I got to talk about how both of them influenced me so much in their totally, totally different ways.
00:25:50.000 Like my mom is an amazing artist.
00:25:52.000 She draws so beautifully and she draws kind of like me if I was a less bitter and jagged person.
00:25:59.000 Like she draws like the sweet me.
00:26:01.000 And I was able to say like, this is how my mom taught me how to draw.
00:26:06.000 You know, this is how she inspired me.
00:26:08.000 You got some great people that reviewed this too, man.
00:26:10.000 You got Matt Taibbi to review this, Patton Oswalt reviewed this.
00:26:14.000 I mean, this is really fucking impressive stuff.
00:26:17.000 Thank you.
00:26:18.000 Matt's awesome.
00:26:19.000 He actually interviewed me for my book launch in New York and I grew up reading that.
00:26:25.000 You know, I was reading like The Exile when I was 18 and I love his stuff in New York Press.
00:26:30.000 What I love about Matt's work is that A lot of journalists like they're like these really like narrow professional people that are very, very serious.
00:26:38.000 And Matt was like this total wild man when he was young.
00:26:41.000 And now he does this incredible investigative journalism on finance and politics, but he still writes like a real person.
00:26:48.000 He still writes in that kind of Hunter S. Thompson tone.
00:26:50.000 That's exactly how I was going to describe it.
00:26:53.000 Like a lucid Hunter S. Thompson.
00:26:55.000 Exactly.
00:26:55.000 Less drug-addled.
00:26:57.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:26:57.000 Best of Hunter S. Thompson and less narcissistic a bit.
00:27:00.000 No, much less narcissistic now.
00:27:02.000 But it was so influential to me because I was like, wow, you can totally be this badass investigative journalist and you could also be this guy who, when he was young, was having these crazy, often criminal adventures in the Aftermath of the Soviet Union falling,
00:27:17.000 those two things were not incompatible at all.
00:27:20.000 I always like people like that who have lives that are really, really diverse.
00:27:23.000 Yeah, that's a really good way of describing him, too, because we do have this idea that if you're going to be an investigative journalist, that your piece has to be sort of homogenized and that the facts take precedent over the flavor of the prose.
00:27:39.000 And his has a lot of flavor.
00:27:41.000 There's a lot of personality in distributing those facts, but it doesn't get in the way of the facts.
00:27:46.000 Oh, God, no, no.
00:27:48.000 It's such like a master class on how to do it.
00:27:51.000 And in fact, it really serves the facts, because especially when he's writing about financial journalism, I mean, finance can be so boring and so complicated that it can really be over most people's heads.
00:28:02.000 And if you write it completely without flavor, most people will never even be able to sink into it at all.
00:28:06.000 Yeah, he's the guy that I got most of my information about the financial collapse about, and one of the things that disturbed me the most was how little reaction, like, publicly, his articles caused.
00:28:19.000 Like, I thought, like, it would be one of those things where everyone would be sharing it, it would go, it would be on the front page of the New York Times, today on CNN, Matt Taibbi, uncover, and everybody would be like, look at the facts, this is crazy!
00:28:33.000 But meanwhile, it was like this...
00:28:37.000 Terrible, terrible scenario where the whole system was hijacked by these fucking criminals and no one seemed to care.
00:28:46.000 I have bills to pay.
00:28:48.000 I have to keep going.
00:28:49.000 I have a spin class at 9 o'clock.
00:28:51.000 I can't be paying.
00:28:52.000 And no one really gave it the attention, or I shouldn't say no one, but not publicly, nationally.
00:28:59.000 It didn't get nearly the attention that it deserved.
00:29:01.000 And he wrote a series of them.
00:29:03.000 And, you know, some of them, I was like, this guy's gonna get fucking killed.
00:29:06.000 Like, these were intense allegations, and backed up, all of it backed up by facts and really well written, and it's just like, almost like it's too much for people.
00:29:17.000 They're just like, ugh.
00:29:19.000 It's like complicated.
00:29:20.000 It deals with a lot of things that are kind of boring, very intellectually demanding, not necessarily partisan.
00:29:26.000 And I think for a lot of people, they're like, what are you going to do?
00:29:30.000 Yeah.
00:29:31.000 It bothers me that he's not more famous.
00:29:33.000 It bothers me.
00:29:34.000 I think, I hope with the next book he will be because I think he's like one of the best journalists working in America.
00:29:40.000 Yeah, I agree.
00:29:42.000 I agree.
00:29:42.000 He's amazing.
00:29:43.000 He's amazing.
00:29:44.000 Now, how much time do you spend doing all this?
00:29:48.000 You do a lot of journalism and you do a lot of crazy shit.
00:29:51.000 You go to a lot of really nutty sort of dangerous places.
00:29:54.000 I've been to a few, yeah.
00:29:55.000 What is like the most disturbing place that you've been to?
00:29:59.000 So the most dangerous place I went to was last summer when I went into Syria for a day.
00:30:03.000 And that was basically...
00:30:07.000 When I talk about how dangerous it was, the fact that I wouldn't even spend the night there shows probably something about my tolerance levels.
00:30:16.000 At that time, this coalition of Islamist groups had just kicked ISIS out of this border town called Azaz.
00:30:24.000 And you could take a bus over to the Turkish border, and then you could cross.
00:30:29.000 And I did that with a war journalist friend of mine, and I spent a day with the Islamic Front driving around Azaz.
00:30:36.000 And one of the things that was happening then was it was before James Foley was murdered, but We all knew that there were lots and lots of kidnappings there, and at that point we thought it was just for ransom and stuff, but still, you know, kidnapping is a terrible, terrible thing.
00:30:54.000 The scariest thing that ever happened to me as a journalist was we're with these three young media activists slash fighter guys, really cool dudes.
00:31:02.000 I mean, I liked them.
00:31:03.000 And we're in this car, we're driving around Azaz, and the car slows to a halt.
00:31:08.000 It just breaks down.
00:31:10.000 And Patrick, the guy I'm with, immediately thinks it's set up for kidnapping to get us out of the car.
00:31:18.000 Because that's one way that you can set things up for kidnappings.
00:31:23.000 And the guys didn't have their guns.
00:31:25.000 And so we had to walk to the media office through Azaz.
00:31:31.000 And Azaz at that point looked like something out of Mad Max.
00:31:33.000 Like it was just no women on the street, just men.
00:31:36.000 A lot of AKs.
00:31:37.000 Even if a guy didn't have an AK, like they'd be holding like sticks and stuff.
00:31:40.000 There were Well, there was a, like, what I can only describe as, like, a gun bodega, which was fascinating because it sold all these different guns.
00:31:49.000 Like, it might sell, like, a beautiful antique, you know, pearl inlaid revolver that, like, someone's dad had, but then also grenades and stuff.
00:31:56.000 Grenades?
00:31:57.000 Grenades, yeah, because, you know, in case someone tried to kidnap you, you'd have a grenade.
00:32:01.000 Have a fucking...
00:32:02.000 You're coming with me, bitch.
00:32:03.000 Boom!
00:32:03.000 Yeah, basically.
00:32:04.000 Basically, yeah.
00:32:05.000 So, you know, we're walking through this town, and...
00:32:09.000 That was, I think, the scariest thing that I ever did in my life.
00:32:12.000 But it all turned out fine.
00:32:13.000 And we got to the media office, which it was a government building that that these young men had taken over when they kicked out the central government.
00:32:22.000 And the director of it had been kidnapped by ISIS. And the young guys are there like watching watching soccer, because everyone everyone loves soccer there.
00:32:31.000 And it was just, I don't know, it's like, This feeling of being in this place where the whole world is both fucking with it and abandoned it both at once,
00:32:46.000 you know?
00:32:49.000 And anything could happen.
00:32:50.000 So that was the most dangerous thing I've ever done.
00:32:52.000 Like nothing I've ever done was as dangerous as going to Syria.
00:32:54.000 But I think the most personally disturbing thing was, I was in Gaza, six months ago, I guess.
00:33:02.000 And I went to Shujaia, which is this neighborhood that was completely destroyed by Israel during Protective Edge, like they bombed it, and then they went in with tanks, and then they went in with bulldozers, like, so it's like, flattened.
00:33:14.000 And it's just, like, gone.
00:33:16.000 Like, you know, you go there and you're like, this is a neighborhood that has been wrecked.
00:33:21.000 And a lot of times when you see houses that have collapsed, you can see all of the stuff of people's lives in it.
00:33:27.000 Like, you're like, oh, there's the cooking pots and there's the bed and there's all the stuff that's just trapped in.
00:33:34.000 And then people, because there's a big housing shortage, obviously, in Gaza, were living in these bombed out buildings, you know, where their home was.
00:33:45.000 And, you know, with, like, no real, like, services or anything, like, I saw this, I was walking, I was kind of scrambling through this, like, building to take pictures, and then I just randomly walked into what I thought was an abandoned room, and there's, like, an old guy there, you know, hanging out, and, you know, I was like, I'm really sorry to,
00:34:01.000 you know, invade your home, and...
00:34:04.000 I was just talking to him, but yeah, he had had a baller, gorgeous home before this, and now he was just living in the wreck of one of the rooms.
00:34:14.000 Whoa.
00:34:16.000 Wow.
00:34:18.000 Mad Max is the way you describe that city, and that sort of apocalyptic scenario is something that we all worry could happen to us, to anything.
00:34:30.000 But one of the things that I always try to remember is that the apocalypse is already here.
00:34:36.000 It's just not here.
00:34:38.000 Yeah.
00:34:38.000 If you go there, it's here.
00:34:40.000 Like, in Gaza, it's there.
00:34:42.000 That's the apocalypse.
00:34:43.000 I mean, it's there.
00:34:44.000 I mean, it might as well be in that guy's house.
00:34:46.000 I mean, you are living like Mad Max.
00:34:48.000 Those people in that, what's the name of the city again?
00:34:50.000 Azaz.
00:34:51.000 Azaz.
00:34:52.000 And Azaz, I mean, that is what everyone's terrified of.
00:34:55.000 What everyone's terrified of is a reality where you walk down the street and everyone's carrying military weapons and you're just, it's chaos.
00:35:03.000 And it's fairly lawless.
00:35:06.000 Yeah, I mean, a lot of the refugee camps that I saw, it's not that they were lawless.
00:35:11.000 I would never describe them as that.
00:35:13.000 But just in the sense of the extreme falling in your life situation, there was a guy I met when I was in Iraqi Kurdistan.
00:35:22.000 Last time I was with Dr. Thot Borders there, and he was this super smart dude.
00:35:28.000 He was Kurdish, which meant that he was really discriminated against, but he scored so high in his math exams, he was able to go to an elite engineering school and get an aeronautics degree.
00:35:37.000 He's an aeronautics engineer.
00:35:39.000 This is a dude that would be on the path to having an awesome job, and now he's living in a tent with his whole family and his mom and everything.
00:35:49.000 You know, you never expect that when you're living in like an awesome city like Aleppo that he was living in.
00:35:55.000 And then the war comes and there's bombings and you're driven out of your home and you're so displaced that eventually you're forced to be living in this tent with no end in sight and you're not allowed to like ever improve your circumstances because you have the wrong passport.
00:36:11.000 Jesus Christ.
00:36:12.000 It's hard for anybody living in America to wrap their head around what it would be like to be there and be stuck in that position.
00:36:19.000 It really is.
00:36:20.000 I mean, so the Syrian refugee thing, one thing that I... I think perhaps isn't in the media enough is that the people who are coming to Europe right now are the middle class of the country because it costs over a thousand dollars to pay a smuggler to take you over.
00:36:41.000 And every single one of those people could Buy a plane ticket and travel like a normal person and not have their kids risk drowning and all of that.
00:36:50.000 But they're banned from it because they're Syrians.
00:36:53.000 And the whole like taking the boat and walking from Greece to Germany and having volunteers give out water and sleeping on the streets and like the whole humanitarian disaster is just a function of not letting them buy plane tickets.
00:37:04.000 That's all it is.
00:37:05.000 Well, there's this big push in America now, especially among the Republicans, to not allow anyone from Syria to come into the United States.
00:37:13.000 It's crazy.
00:37:13.000 Like, not a single person with the Syrian refugee program has ever been arrested for a terrorism offense.
00:37:17.000 It's like, it's nuts.
00:37:18.000 It's...
00:37:18.000 it's so...
00:37:20.000 But they're bound!
00:37:21.000 They're so scary!
00:37:22.000 They're terrorists!
00:37:23.000 Oh my god, it's...
00:37:24.000 I swear.
00:37:25.000 There's gotta be, like, one of them that's an asshole.
00:37:27.000 I'm sure there's assholes, but not one of them was arrested for a terrorism offense, ever.
00:37:30.000 But I guarantee if you let, like, a million Canadians in, you're gonna...
00:37:33.000 and they're the nicest people ever.
00:37:35.000 There'd be some of those guys that are in that big riot, what was it, in Toronto?
00:37:38.000 Yeah, one of them.
00:37:39.000 Yeah, one of them would get through.
00:37:40.000 One of them would get through.
00:37:41.000 Or one of them from the Vancouver hockey riot.
00:37:44.000 Yeah.
00:37:44.000 One of those assholes would make it through.
00:37:46.000 No, it's crazy and it's really personally upsetting to me because I've done so much work with Syrians over the last few years and to see these amazing people that I know who are so tough and so smart And have endured so much,
00:38:03.000 like being defamed like this, I feel almost like someone's shit-talking, like my...
00:38:07.000 Well, someone is shit-talking, my friends.
00:38:09.000 You know, it makes me angry on a personal level, like not just a theoretical one.
00:38:13.000 Well, it's not just...
00:38:14.000 It's so short-sighted because if you consider the fact that...
00:38:18.000 You're talking about an entire group of people that's fleeing a terrible area.
00:38:22.000 Exactly.
00:38:23.000 And you're saying, well, they've all got to be bad.
00:38:25.000 That's one of the most racist things that you could ever say publicly in 2015. Like, it's sort of this weird accepted racism.
00:38:35.000 And because of the fact that terrorism, like, when you're dealing with Muslims, right, you're dealing with 1.6, is that what it is?
00:38:43.000 Billion people?
00:38:44.000 It's like a fifth of the world.
00:38:45.000 Yeah.
00:38:46.000 And so the idea is saying, well, these terrorist activities, they've been done by Muslims.
00:38:51.000 Why don't we kick all the white people out of America because white people have been responsible for all the mass shootings?
00:38:57.000 I mean, that's more logical than this.
00:39:00.000 It's so awful.
00:39:02.000 And the other thing that's, to me, particularly moronic is I see sometimes in the media, like, why aren't the Muslims condemning the terrorists?
00:39:11.000 Every single group that is actually on the ground fighting ISIS with guns, you know...
00:39:16.000 They're Muslims.
00:39:17.000 Yeah, they're like 90% Muslim, or 95% Muslim.
00:39:19.000 I mean, a lot of them are war criminals, too.
00:39:22.000 I'm not saying they're good groups, necessarily, but they're Muslim.
00:39:25.000 Every single major Muslim religious leader in the world has condemned ISIS in terms that...
00:39:30.000 They wouldn't even use in America.
00:39:32.000 I mean, it's astounding to me.
00:39:34.000 I think that the only reason anyone would think that Muslims aren't condemning ISIS is because they can't use Google, don't read the news, and have never spoken to a Muslim.
00:39:42.000 Or for the same reason why Matt Taibbi's articles never really got as popular as I thought they should.
00:39:47.000 People just don't have the time or the need.
00:39:51.000 Everything is wonderful.
00:39:52.000 You go to the supermarket.
00:39:52.000 You buy food.
00:39:53.000 It's really easy.
00:39:55.000 You know, you go through the McDonald's drive-through.
00:39:57.000 Your stomach's full.
00:39:58.000 You sit home.
00:39:59.000 You watch Netflix.
00:40:00.000 You're good.
00:40:01.000 Like, you don't need to pay attention to Syria.
00:40:03.000 Fuck those people.
00:40:04.000 Keep them out!
00:40:04.000 Donald Trump's gonna keep us safe!
00:40:07.000 And you just drink yourself into a coma, wake up in the morning, do it all over again.
00:40:12.000 Drink some coffee, get out the door, get in your fucking car, do the same shit.
00:40:15.000 As long as you can get to work.
00:40:17.000 I got bills.
00:40:18.000 As long as you can get to work, you're fine.
00:40:20.000 It's just...
00:40:21.000 The idea of America in the first place was supposed to be a place where people could go, where they didn't like where they were, and they wanted to found...
00:40:29.000 They wanted to establish a new life.
00:40:32.000 They wanted to...
00:40:33.000 We're going to take a giant chance.
00:40:35.000 We're going to get in a fucking stupid boat and make it across this giant body of water.
00:40:39.000 We don't even know what it looks like.
00:40:40.000 They didn't even have photos back then.
00:40:42.000 That's one of the weirdest things about traveling to America, if you really stop and think about it.
00:40:46.000 It was done when people didn't even have photographs.
00:40:50.000 The first people that came over, if you wanted to picture something, you had to fucking draw it.
00:40:55.000 And that's how crazy these people were.
00:40:57.000 They're like, I don't care.
00:40:59.000 I saw a drawing and some pretty trees.
00:41:01.000 We're fucking getting in the boat.
00:41:02.000 But they brought their babies and their grandma and shit and they got in a boat and they came to America because they had an idea.
00:41:09.000 And that idea was there is a better life here.
00:41:10.000 We can make it.
00:41:12.000 And the two deny that to these people because they were born on the wrong patch of dirt.
00:41:18.000 And I'm not saying they shouldn't be checked.
00:41:21.000 You shouldn't go through a criminal background check and make sure you're not letting in some mass murderer or not letting in some rapist or some thieves or whatever.
00:41:29.000 Yeah, I mean, if there's a way to do that, that should be done.
00:41:32.000 But the idea that you should never let anybody in that's from Syria, it's like, God, man, imagine you're cursed just because you were born on the shitty patch of dirt.
00:41:42.000 Yeah, that's exactly what the thinking is.
00:41:44.000 It's like, because you were born here, you carry some virus and you have to be quarantined.
00:41:48.000 And man, I'm so fucking grateful that you're saying this to your audience on the massive platform you have.
00:41:54.000 I know I sound sappy and shit, but thank you, really.
00:41:57.000 Well, listen, thank you for going over there.
00:41:59.000 If it wasn't for people like you and the vice people and all these journalists and all these people that go over there and show us in video form exactly what's happening and get to watch it and see what it's like, they go, oh, this is fucking chaos.
00:42:14.000 This is in the world right now.
00:42:16.000 2015, while people are watching the Emmys and everybody's on the red carpet smiling, there's parts of the world that are like a Mad Max movie.
00:42:25.000 Right now.
00:42:26.000 Or like, this refugee camp I went to, or it was a bunch of refugee camps in the Bekaa Valley in Lebanon.
00:42:33.000 Like, people don't know.
00:42:34.000 It gets cold there.
00:42:35.000 Like, kids freeze to death, you know, every winter in those camps, because it's like you're Living under vinyl tarp in the mountains.
00:42:44.000 Jesus Christ.
00:42:48.000 It's very strange that the world is so uneven.
00:42:53.000 That there are places like the Congo that exist on the same timeline as Park Avenue.
00:43:01.000 There's people that have doormen that dress up like the guys that were holding open the door for Putin.
00:43:07.000 You hop into Uber limousines and you travel around the city with the right fragrances in the car.
00:43:16.000 We live in really strange times.
00:43:20.000 The disparity that existed, that's kind of always existed.
00:43:23.000 There's always been disparity.
00:43:24.000 There's always been, you know, the haves and the have-nots, and in some places it's on a much more grand scale.
00:43:30.000 But it's never been so obvious.
00:43:33.000 Especially because so many people are online now.
00:43:37.000 I think a lot of people maybe don't realize...
00:43:43.000 Especially in the Middle East, how internet-connected people are.
00:43:46.000 When I was in Domiz, which is the refugee camp in Iraq that I was at, one of the most popular stores was the store that was selling personal Wi-Fi hotspots.
00:43:56.000 And you'd have people that were living in a tent with tarp and nothing, but they'd have a Wi-Fi hotspot.
00:44:03.000 And that's because they had a family that was scattered all around the world, and the only way to communicate with them was with WhatsApp.
00:44:09.000 With texting services like this or with Skype, and so the most important thing you were going to get was internet access so that you could talk to your brother that was in one country and your daughter that was in another.
00:44:18.000 That was more important than anything.
00:44:20.000 You said daughter.
00:44:21.000 I heard your New York came out.
00:44:23.000 Oh, fuck.
00:44:23.000 It's coming out, man.
00:44:24.000 I tried so hard.
00:44:25.000 You get excited it came out.
00:44:26.000 You sound like my uncle.
00:44:28.000 Yeah, man.
00:44:30.000 Yeah, it's true.
00:44:31.000 It's true.
00:44:31.000 I'm from Queens originally.
00:44:33.000 Well, you know what's kind of crazy is, I guarantee you, there's a high possibility that someone in one of those camps is listening to you right now.
00:44:40.000 Oh, absolutely.
00:44:41.000 On this podcast that have downloaded it from the internet.
00:44:44.000 No, it's absolutely true.
00:44:48.000 I wonder, I feel like if you're, like if someone who's listening, is listening, you know, from a camp or is listening, you know, in a refugee situation, like I, man, how cool would it be to get someone like that on your show as a guest if there is like a way with Skype or something?
00:45:02.000 That'd be amazing.
00:45:03.000 I have to clear it with Donald Trump, make sure he thinks it's okay.
00:45:05.000 Are Syrian voices allowed into the country or would that cause ISIS? Does ISIS come from Syrian voices?
00:45:10.000 Most likely it's a disease of the mind.
00:45:13.000 He wants to stop the internet to the Middle East.
00:45:15.000 Have you heard this?
00:45:16.000 This is the latest Donald Trump thing?
00:45:17.000 I had a signing last night, so I unfortunately missed the intellectual glory that was the Republican debate, so fill me in on this.
00:45:24.000 I didn't see it, but he was talking about this, that one of the things that they would do, or he would do, is knock off the internet to certain parts of the Middle East.
00:45:35.000 Why?
00:45:36.000 Well, because that's how they're plotting against us, Molly Crabapple, while you sit in your wonderful New York apartment writing books about sex.
00:45:46.000 The terrorists.
00:45:48.000 The terrorists are winning.
00:45:49.000 Oh, God.
00:45:50.000 I mean, so...
00:45:51.000 In ISIS territories that those fuckers are occupying, they got rid of private internet access in people's homes because they're really scared of the internet, too.
00:46:00.000 They are super scared because there are all these citizen activists and journalists that are revealing shit about them on the internet.
00:46:06.000 Right now, like if you're in Raqqa, the only way to even get online is to be on these internet cafes that are kind of run by dudes with ISIS connections.
00:46:15.000 Whoa.
00:46:19.000 That's because ISIS is also really fucking scared of the internet.
00:46:21.000 They really don't like it.
00:46:23.000 Really?
00:46:23.000 Yeah.
00:46:24.000 Why is that?
00:46:25.000 Well, because a lot of Syrians living and Iraqis living in their territories fucking hate them, and they give intel on them to foreign journalists.
00:46:36.000 That's fascinating.
00:46:37.000 So the internet acts as a way that they communicate and establish plans, but it also acts as something that's plotting against them.
00:46:45.000 Exactly.
00:46:46.000 Same as the internet does it everywhere else.
00:46:48.000 Yeah.
00:46:48.000 I mean, it's just communication.
00:46:50.000 It's just people.
00:46:51.000 Yeah.
00:46:51.000 When you're a group of cunts that the whole world hates and you're online, I guarantee you're going to get some haters.
00:46:57.000 Yeah, I mean, there's a there's one group of journalists there that's became very famous that's called BRCA is being silently slaughtered that I mean, they did tons of work documenting ISIS shit and ISIS, I mean, beheaded two of their members that were in Turkey.
00:47:13.000 And there are plenty of other citizen journalists there.
00:47:16.000 And yeah, ISIS is dead scared of normal of normal people who are living under their fucking occupation using the internet.
00:47:23.000 They hate it.
00:47:24.000 You know, another thing they're scared of, they're scared of being killed by women.
00:47:27.000 So that's kind of, I think, this is my theory, that the Kurdish, they won't go to heaven if a Kurdish girl kills them thing.
00:47:35.000 I think like one person said that and then they saw how much play it got in the media and they were like, oh man, this is good PR. Let's keep, let's keep milking this one.
00:47:43.000 You think so?
00:47:44.000 I think so, yeah.
00:47:44.000 Does it make sense ideologically, like within their religion?
00:47:47.000 Is that something that they believe in?
00:47:49.000 If you get killed by a woman, you don't get all the virgins?
00:47:51.000 No, I think that's bullshit.
00:47:52.000 I think maybe there's like a macho thing, you know, where they're like, oh, fuck, a girl shot my leg, but it's not a theological thing.
00:47:59.000 Damn it.
00:48:00.000 It seems so good, though.
00:48:02.000 I know, really.
00:48:02.000 It seems sweet.
00:48:04.000 I was just thinking of like some crazy Amazon scenario.
00:48:06.000 Just like armies of chicks with guns chasing ISIS and they just run away because they're scared of being killed by chicks.
00:48:12.000 I mean, the women who are fighting ISIS in the YPJ are ferocious soldiers, but ISIS is scared of getting killed by soldiers.
00:48:22.000 If that was true, though, and we really allocated our resources correctly, I think there's probably enough really mean bitches in the world we could put together a hell of a fucking army.
00:48:33.000 I think so, too, with tons of motivation.
00:48:36.000 Could you imagine just jets and bombers and missiles all being piloted by women?
00:48:43.000 Like, that's it.
00:48:43.000 Only women.
00:48:44.000 Only women going after ISIS because if they get killed by these women, they're fucked and they don't get to go to heaven.
00:48:50.000 I think you'd have to do like a more...
00:48:54.000 I think that the bombings aren't doing shit against ISIS. I think what YPG is doing is, you know, I think it'd have to be more on the ground.
00:49:01.000 On the ground, yeah.
00:49:02.000 Well, especially in Afghanistan, right?
00:49:06.000 That's one of the things that people have always had a problem with invading Afghanistan.
00:49:09.000 It's essentially a series of mountain ranges occupied by warlords.
00:49:13.000 There's not a lot of access.
00:49:16.000 It's not so easy to get to.
00:49:17.000 Well, the thing with ISIS is what they do is they, I mean, they move in, you know, they occupy cities, like a military occupation.
00:49:22.000 They try to, you know, marry people and build families.
00:49:24.000 And they try to insert themselves as much as possible into the fabric of a city.
00:49:28.000 And that's in part, it's them making it so that if you, you know, bombed Raqqa, you would be murdering hundreds of thousands of innocent civilians who were just too poor to get out.
00:49:39.000 So they do it strategically?
00:49:41.000 Yeah.
00:49:41.000 Sort of embed themselves as a human shield?
00:49:44.000 Yeah, exactly.
00:49:45.000 The majority of Raqqa, they're like farmers who couldn't afford to get out because it's expensive to even get out of Syria.
00:49:55.000 What a mess.
00:49:56.000 What a crazy, chaotic, psychotic mess.
00:49:59.000 It's really bizarre that, remember that Obama speech that he had on television, was it a year or so ago, where he was talking about eminent military action against Syria and the whole country went, what?
00:50:12.000 Are you fucking crazy?
00:50:14.000 And then it just stopped.
00:50:17.000 Literally, like, silence.
00:50:18.000 Like, you didn't hear anything more about it.
00:50:20.000 They just completely backed off just because Republicans and Democrats, everyone was like, are you out of your fucking mind?
00:50:25.000 Like, look what happened in Iraq.
00:50:27.000 Look what happened in Afghanistan.
00:50:28.000 Look at the massive negative reaction the American public has had to all these military actions.
00:50:34.000 You're gonna start up a new one in Syria?
00:50:36.000 For what reason?
00:50:37.000 Because somebody got gassed?
00:50:38.000 Because they gassed people?
00:50:39.000 Like, what's going on that we need to sacrifice American lives over there exactly?
00:50:44.000 Like, what's the cause of all this?
00:50:46.000 I mean, what's really sort of so tragic about Syria is that Obama, this is me saying an opinion that's not necessarily mine, but it's opinion that I've gotten from speaking to refugees.
00:50:59.000 A lot of people, I think, felt very led on by what Obama said, and they felt like, Oh, there's going to be, you know, some support or, I don't know, some action against Assad.
00:51:12.000 Because, I mean, what everyone thinks about American intervention or non-intervention, what Assad did is a crime against humanity on a massive scale.
00:51:21.000 Whatever you think we should have done, what he did was fucking horrific.
00:51:24.000 And anyone who is in Syria and, you know, who was at the receiving end of that would very often want someone else to intervene.
00:51:32.000 Why don't you explain to people what he did do?
00:51:34.000 He ran, like, an industrial-scale arrest-torture-killing program.
00:51:44.000 He does something called barrel bombings, which are taking, like, basically, like, dumpsters full of TNT and shrapnel and dropping them on populated areas.
00:51:53.000 He targets schools, targets hospitals, destroyed large swaths of Aleppo.
00:51:59.000 And this isn't me saying...
00:52:03.000 This isn't me saying that I think the U.S. should have intervened, because I... I still don't know, but I'm very against the U.S. intervening in general and anything, because I think we always fuck it up.
00:52:14.000 But he also factually did do those things.
00:52:20.000 It's just hard to imagine that someone's capable of doing shit like that.
00:52:25.000 It's just where people can get to, where people can get to in their minds that allows them to do shit like that.
00:52:33.000 I think what it was was his one of the things that was quite influential was his father put down a sort of incipient insurgency opposition thing in a city called Hama by killing 20,000 people and like bombing the fuck out of the city and it put put it down and I think that perhaps in his mind he thought that he could do the same when there was no uprising against him but obviously that you know wasn't what happened.
00:53:00.000 Well, that's the story of Saddam Hussein and his sons as well.
00:53:04.000 Imagine being the son of an evil, brutal dictator.
00:53:08.000 Yeah, and you're just like, well, those sons always end up like these fucking Nero figures, don't they?
00:53:13.000 Exactly.
00:53:13.000 I mean, it's like the father is very often like a thuggish military guy.
00:53:19.000 And then the son is this princeling who always got whatever he wanted in his life.
00:53:24.000 And that's when it gets so, so weird.
00:53:25.000 You see it with like Kim Jong-il also.
00:53:27.000 Exactly.
00:53:28.000 Yeah.
00:53:29.000 And Uday and Kuse, is that what his name is?
00:53:31.000 Yeah.
00:53:32.000 Those motherfuckers.
00:53:33.000 Oof.
00:53:34.000 God, I read some horrible stories about what they would do.
00:53:36.000 They would find women that were getting married and they would take them from their husband, rape them, and then feed them to dogs.
00:53:43.000 They had dogs that they had in their basement that they just didn't feed and they would throw people that they didn't like to their dogs and the dogs would tear them apart.
00:53:51.000 Whoa!
00:53:53.000 And they would watch, of course.
00:53:55.000 But the fact that a person can get to that place, that a person can get to that place where they...
00:54:01.000 In the weirdest way, we're flexible in a beautiful way.
00:54:06.000 You know, you can see someone who can create beautiful songs and...
00:54:10.000 Art and they can touch people with their words and their thoughts and their deeds and you know they can they can be something inspirational and amazing but we're also flexible in this horrific way where they could play upon the worst fears and the worst the worst emotions that people are capable of Of manifesting and they could just attack and torture and maim and brutalize and murder and they could do it wantonly and do it for no real
00:54:40.000 reason.
00:54:41.000 They could do it sadistically for fun, for recreation.
00:54:44.000 The fact that that's the same beast.
00:54:48.000 It's just they're human beings and it's like...
00:54:51.000 I mean there could obviously be some anomalies in the brain itself but essentially a good portion of what makes a person who they are is Their environment and their life experiences and the nurturing and like how they're raised and what they're exposed to and we get we're so flexible and pliable because we want to survive that We're capable,
00:55:13.000 the same species during the same time period, we're not talking about like cave people that cannibalized because they didn't have books, they didn't understand it was bad, and they hadn't invented language yet.
00:55:23.000 No, we're talking about people with the internet.
00:55:26.000 They're capable of doing these horrific things, but at the same time, there's someone like, you know, I mean, you fill in the blank, there's a lot of beautiful people out there that do things, but my friend Justin Wren, who's from these photos over here, who goes to the Congo, and he lives with the pygmies for six months a year,
00:55:42.000 and he He builds wells for them and he gets malaria and almost dies.
00:55:47.000 He's an American from Texas.
00:55:49.000 He just went over there and saw how incredible these people were and he dedicates his life to it.
00:55:54.000 To me, he's one of my favorite people because he's this beautiful manifestation of experiencing friendship and love from these people and just becoming incredibly dedicated to try to take care of them.
00:56:05.000 But these people exist at the same time.
00:56:07.000 It's so hard to understand.
00:56:09.000 Like a parrot is a fucking parrot.
00:56:11.000 You know, some parrots you can tame and they'll eat peanuts out of your hand.
00:56:15.000 And other ones, they live in the trees.
00:56:16.000 But they're fucking parrots.
00:56:18.000 And we're like everything all at once.
00:56:20.000 We're so weird.
00:56:22.000 We're so weird.
00:56:23.000 I mean, I'm a fan of people.
00:56:25.000 Don't get me wrong.
00:56:27.000 You're pro people?
00:56:28.000 I'm a huge fan of people.
00:56:30.000 I love people.
00:56:31.000 I think we're amazing.
00:56:32.000 But we're also horrible.
00:56:35.000 What we're capable of is so strange.
00:56:38.000 You know, like, you or I are not capable of those things.
00:56:42.000 So for us to see that, like, what we consider a horrible person in America is like someone who says something horrible on, you know, on Twitter about race or something like that.
00:56:54.000 Or someone who's, you know, disparaging about President Obama or, you know, it's like so minor in a lot of ways.
00:57:01.000 What we shame people for here, you know?
00:57:04.000 You didn't use the correct gender pronoun, you piece of shit.
00:57:09.000 Terrible, terrible things that are going on at the same time in other parts of the world.
00:57:15.000 I mean, I don't believe in a race to the bottom.
00:57:17.000 It shouldn't be like, well, you haven't thrown someone to the dog, so you're cool.
00:57:21.000 No, it's definitely not that.
00:57:23.000 No, but I definitely hear where you're coming from.
00:57:28.000 That is funny, right?
00:57:29.000 You can always look at Saddam Hussein's kids and be like, I'm fine.
00:57:32.000 Be like, all I did was punch a baby.
00:57:34.000 I didn't have dogs eat it.
00:57:36.000 Why do you gotta shame me for my baby punching?
00:57:38.000 Shaming.
00:57:39.000 Shaming is a new thing, right?
00:57:41.000 When did shaming come around?
00:57:42.000 I mean, I feel like- Public shaming is sort of an old American tradition.
00:57:49.000 We have a book called The Scarlet Letter about public shaming.
00:57:51.000 Yeah, but not as a phrase, you know?
00:57:53.000 Like fat shaming, you know?
00:57:56.000 You mean when it became...
00:57:57.000 Yeah, slut shaming.
00:57:59.000 Like, these terms are very new.
00:58:01.000 These are, like, these new concepts.
00:58:04.000 I mean, I think that they're new coinages to describe, you know, old behavior.
00:58:11.000 And the truth is, I do think people should be criticized for, like...
00:58:16.000 I don't know.
00:58:16.000 I feel like if you're going on Twitter and you're writing, you're a dumb whore, to random women, that is jerk-ass behavior.
00:58:22.000 And people should tell you that you're being a fucking jerk for it.
00:58:24.000 Unless she's really into it.
00:58:25.000 That's her thing.
00:58:27.000 If she's previously expressed a desire for that.
00:58:32.000 Yeah, they have an established relationship.
00:58:34.000 You're a dumb whore.
00:58:34.000 Oh, you fucker.
00:58:35.000 Get over here.
00:58:36.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:58:37.000 Previous consent.
00:58:38.000 But to random women who don't have that in their Twitter bio, that that's what they're into...
00:58:43.000 I think like you were being a jerkass and if someone is like fuck you stop calling random women whores on Twitter Oh, yeah, you know, I think that I think that's fine I think that what we're talking about before about having no That one day we're gonna come a time where there's no boundaries between people.
00:58:57.000 I'm really absolutely convinced this like I've I've had these weird Trips in the sensory deprivation tank where I've sort of seen this take place the slow acceptance of what is the ultimate inevitable reality and And it kind of freaks me out sometimes I have to get out of the tank because I just can't handle it because I really think I think like life as a person We have this idea that we're gonna put our shell on and we're good.
00:59:23.000 I got my shell on.
00:59:24.000 Yeah, this is gonna be no shells It's we're gonna just have to somehow or another like you know how you have friends like I have friends that I'm almost too close to them I know everything they do, you know, like what'd you do?
00:59:35.000 Ah, you fucker.
00:59:35.000 Why?
00:59:35.000 How'd you do that?
00:59:36.000 Oh my god, what are you doing?
00:59:37.000 I just fucking lost my mind.
00:59:39.000 But you know everything.
00:59:41.000 We're gonna know that about everybody.
00:59:43.000 It's just a matter of time.
00:59:44.000 But the thing is, I don't think it's going to make us nicer to each other or make us like each other better.
00:59:48.000 I think that one of the things that Twitter has done – I love Twitter.
00:59:52.000 I'm addicted to Twitter.
00:59:53.000 I love it.
00:59:54.000 I think it's really cool.
00:59:55.000 But in addition to having us speak to all sorts of amazing people that we never would have spoken to before, it also really revealed what other people were thinking and made us really dislike them for it.
01:00:06.000 In a lot of ways, right?
01:00:07.000 Yeah.
01:00:08.000 Yeah.
01:00:09.000 Well, it's also the anonymity, the ability to reach out to Molly and just say some mean shit anonymously.
01:00:15.000 You know, you're just this little egg.
01:00:17.000 I'm a little egg.
01:00:19.000 You know, that's all your icon is.
01:00:21.000 And, you know, you have a series of letters that represent your egg.
01:00:26.000 And then you're like, fuck you, Molly Crabapple.
01:00:28.000 You fucking bitch.
01:00:29.000 I read your bullshit.
01:00:30.000 I don't even believe that's how it went down.
01:00:31.000 I think you're a fucking attention whore.
01:00:33.000 Ah!
01:00:33.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:00:34.000 And then you read that, you're like, ow!
01:00:36.000 You know, you fucking anonymous person searing my soul with your hate.
01:00:42.000 I mean, I don't, like, I get a lot of, like, as I'm sure you do.
01:00:47.000 I think, okay, so this is the thing.
01:00:49.000 Sometimes the thing that helps me put it in perspective is I got 70,000 Twitter followers.
01:00:53.000 And I think if I ever had any other grouping, like any real-life grouping of 70,000 people, like, what would be the jackass ratio that I would expect in that?
01:01:00.000 Yeah.
01:01:01.000 It's always 1 in 100. That's my thought.
01:01:04.000 My thought is it's the real 1% that we should be concerned with.
01:01:08.000 The jackass 1%?
01:01:09.000 Yeah, the mean people.
01:01:10.000 Because I think they're so common.
01:01:12.000 The idea of the 1% being the real problem in America, being successful people.
01:01:16.000 I think if you got the 1% of all the successful people together, only 1% of them would be evil cunts.
01:01:22.000 I really believe that.
01:01:24.000 I think you keep going with the 1%.
01:01:27.000 Out of those people that are evil, how many of them are true sociopaths?
01:01:30.000 Probably 1% of them, too.
01:01:32.000 It keeps going.
01:01:33.000 But if you have 300 million people, you're dealing with 3 million assholes.
01:01:39.000 Like if there's a hundred people, one of them is going to suck.
01:01:42.000 And if you have 300 million, you have 3 million people that suck.
01:01:46.000 And if they all get a hold of your Twitter account, you're going to think the world has ended.
01:01:50.000 You're going to think, my God, and you won't see the other 99. You won't see them because the hateful words of the one will just be overwhelming.
01:01:58.000 And every now and then, Molly, your book's amazing.
01:02:01.000 You're like, retweet.
01:02:03.000 It's a lie.
01:02:03.000 It's a lie.
01:02:03.000 Oh, I just cling to this!
01:02:05.000 Yeah, you'll try to find it.
01:02:06.000 I mean, I've watched people in scans.
01:02:08.000 Like, we were talking about Lance Armstrong.
01:02:10.000 And I looked at the mentions that Lance Armstrong gets on Twitter.
01:02:14.000 Like, anything he writes.
01:02:16.000 Like, anything he writes.
01:02:17.000 Like, had a great time, you know, doing this race.
01:02:20.000 Was it as good a times when you're running away from drug tests?
01:02:23.000 Oh, for fuck's sake.
01:02:24.000 Like, they can't help it.
01:02:26.000 It's like, people just love to dig.
01:02:29.000 They just love to fucking reach out of that ribcage and pull out your heart.
01:02:34.000 They can't help it.
01:02:35.000 They know they can.
01:02:36.000 And it's also a new ability that human beings have sort of cultivated over the last couple decades.
01:02:42.000 It really didn't exist before.
01:02:44.000 Well, before, you would have had to have written a letter, left your mom's basement, walked all the way down to the block with all these other humans.
01:02:50.000 It's always your mom's basement.
01:02:52.000 Why don't I say your dad's basement, your girlfriend's basement?
01:02:56.000 There's so many other basements these people could be in.
01:02:57.000 Why do I have to put them all in their mom's basement?
01:02:59.000 Because it's somehow or another for a man the most pathetic thing.
01:03:02.000 Like, Mom!
01:03:03.000 I'm down here, Mom!
01:03:04.000 Stop yelling!
01:03:05.000 I'm down here telling people they're wrong on the internet!
01:03:07.000 You're typing up a fucking storm and trying to hurt Lance Armstrong's feelings.
01:03:15.000 You're cycling and fucking lying.
01:03:18.000 Yeah.
01:03:19.000 I like that.
01:03:20.000 That was a good personification of that.
01:03:24.000 It's like this feeling of just wanting to just somehow or another get a reaction.
01:03:29.000 And it's all losers.
01:03:30.000 That's unfortunate.
01:03:32.000 I mean, I hate to say that to those people right now.
01:03:34.000 They're like, no, no, I'm a winner and I think what he did was dishonorable.
01:03:38.000 Okay, well then you might think it, but if you actually are sitting around trying to attack him, I guarantee you that is energy and focus that you could have best spent on your own life.
01:03:49.000 100%.
01:03:49.000 Or like maybe if you're just like a mean critical person who is a winner, you could have written a really great essay about like juicing in the sport that like really took him down.
01:03:58.000 And then you could have challenged your like meanness in a positive and winning direction.
01:04:01.000 But if you really looked at the essay, honestly, you'd have to take down the whole sport itself.
01:04:06.000 I mean, you really wouldn't.
01:04:07.000 If you want to take down Lance Armstrong, you'd have to take him down by his individual actions in defending his actions in the sport.
01:04:15.000 Yeah.
01:04:17.000 He admits that.
01:04:19.000 He's pretty open about the fact that he fucked up and that he made some pretty horrible choices.
01:04:25.000 That's it.
01:04:26.000 The sport itself, like if you really wanted to write an essay, you'd write, what the fuck, a bunch of steroid using bike riders.
01:04:32.000 That's what you got.
01:04:33.000 Yeah, and you'd write, like, probably about the economic impetus and all the ways that, like, top people were able to kind of condone it, but then get out with their hands clean.
01:04:42.000 And you'd write something, like, that really channeled your meanness into a positive direction that really tore shit down.
01:04:47.000 Yeah, that's a weird thing about blogs, too, though.
01:04:50.000 I've read some really mean blogs that people write about folks, and I'm like, what's interesting about this is, like, Blogs are not a conversation.
01:04:58.000 It's like you're you have this attack this focused attack of of an individual But if that individual was there and they could respond to this and you could have a communicate It would be a different thing like what it is is like It's like a message tied to the claw of a raven that you're sending out like it's so it's such a one-way thing and It's not really an effective way to communicate because you're not really trying to communicate.
01:05:26.000 What you're trying to do is hurt somebody.
01:05:28.000 Like when you see attack blogs...
01:05:31.000 Oh, they're the worst, yeah.
01:05:32.000 There's some that deserve it.
01:05:33.000 Like if you could write an expose on someone who runs some horrible business that is using slave labor or fill in the blank on some terrible scenario that you could expose...
01:05:43.000 I mean, the world should see it.
01:05:45.000 Like, okay, here, Matt Taivi's expose on the financial collapse.
01:05:49.000 Brilliant, yeah.
01:05:50.000 Brilliant.
01:05:50.000 Perfect.
01:05:51.000 And, you know, those are real legitimate and important.
01:05:54.000 But I've read some things that people have written that are just about, like, random celebrities or, you know, like...
01:05:59.000 You're just like, why are you that invested in Tyler Swift?
01:06:02.000 Like, how do you have so much opinion?
01:06:04.000 I think it's Taylor.
01:06:07.000 I'm a fucking dork.
01:06:08.000 I don't know anything.
01:06:09.000 Well, I'm a fucking dork, too.
01:06:11.000 Haters gonna hate, hate, hate.
01:06:13.000 That fucking song, I like that song, goddamn, because I have daughters and I have a wife.
01:06:16.000 That goddamn song is playing all the time.
01:06:19.000 They play it in the car when I'm with them.
01:06:20.000 I'm like, okay, you can play that one.
01:06:22.000 I like that one.
01:06:23.000 Cool.
01:06:24.000 That's awesome.
01:06:25.000 I'm embarrassed that I like it.
01:06:27.000 No, no, it just it shows like diverse musical tastes.
01:06:30.000 That's all I definitely have that sometimes too diverse, you know, but I don't know how we got into that But it's like yeah, like mean takedowns of like some singer like come on really this terrible person really affecting your life in some strange way but like The comments that people will make to people,
01:06:50.000 I believe, on Twitter and Facebook, well, Facebook is slightly less anonymous, but all these anonymous methods of communicating, they're going to dissolve slowly but surely the boundaries between people.
01:07:03.000 It's not just going to be the NSA that can find out exactly what you're doing and who's saying what to who.
01:07:08.000 It's going to be the whole fucking world.
01:07:10.000 Everyone's going to be able to do that.
01:07:13.000 It's going to be very, very weird.
01:07:14.000 Very weird.
01:07:15.000 The other thing is people will find out the people who are doing that.
01:07:19.000 I remember there was this asshole who made a bunch of Twitter accounts to write that women who worked in tech, but then just random women he didn't like were cunts.
01:07:31.000 And he really fixated on this one woman who is a programmer at Tor, which is an anonymous web browser.
01:07:36.000 And he made seven Twitter accounts at one point to tell her she was a cunt.
01:07:40.000 And so, finally, she was like, this has gone on long enough.
01:07:46.000 And when he was visiting her website, presumably to find more proof that she was a cunt, she got his IP address, tracked down where he worked, and posted his name in his workplace.
01:07:57.000 And with the line that was like, it's classic, she wrote, should have used tour, fucko.
01:08:01.000 And I was like, you know...
01:08:05.000 If you went up to a bunch of women or if you went up to a bunch of women at bars and just screamed like cunt in their face, like eventually either them or their boyfriend or someone around was going to hit you.
01:08:14.000 But because you were doing this online, you thought like, wow, I can just go up to people and scream cunt and nothing's ever going to happen.
01:08:19.000 And, you know, it did.
01:08:20.000 And there's no one who's going to be sympathetic to anyone who's going to get seven Twitter accounts just to call some woman a cunt.
01:08:26.000 Yeah.
01:08:27.000 No, no one feels bad that he got doxed.
01:08:29.000 Well, the poor guy got doxed.
01:08:31.000 Well, he was just expressing himself and exercising his First Amendment rights.
01:08:36.000 No, I really think we're maybe a few years away from that just not being around anymore, from it being some strange new world where we're all going to know exactly...
01:08:48.000 I really believe that we're maybe 10 years away from being able to read each other's thoughts.
01:08:54.000 Oh God, can you imagine?
01:08:56.000 Yeah, it's going to be very strange.
01:08:58.000 But all the romance and things is going to be gone.
01:09:00.000 Because so much of really exciting things in life is anticipating and not knowing.
01:09:08.000 And then, you know, it's almost like the unwrapping of Christmas presents.
01:09:11.000 Like when someone texts you, hey, what are you doing?
01:09:14.000 And you're like, Yes, it's her!
01:09:16.000 Fuck yeah!
01:09:17.000 There's that moment where you didn't know if someone likes you or not, what's going on, and then you're going back and forth with each other, sending each other emails, or you get that phone call out of the blue from someone you didn't know they really were into you, and you're like, yeah!
01:09:31.000 But when you know everyone's thoughts, it's going to be like, oh, you're into me, you fucker.
01:09:36.000 Why are you playing?
01:09:37.000 There's going to be no playing cool.
01:09:38.000 There's going to be no...
01:09:41.000 When you go to apply for a job, you're like, well, you fucking don't like me, so I'll just get out of here.
01:09:46.000 You think I'm a loser, so you're not going to hire me.
01:09:49.000 There's not going to be any illusions.
01:09:52.000 So a lot of romance is going to be gone.
01:09:54.000 A lot of the fun of things is not knowing.
01:09:58.000 We don't like that, though.
01:10:01.000 No, I'm an artist.
01:10:02.000 I like the not knowing.
01:10:05.000 I like the mystery sometimes.
01:10:07.000 It's fun as long as it works out.
01:10:10.000 Obviously, it's worked out for you.
01:10:11.000 You're a young woman.
01:10:12.000 You already have a book published.
01:10:15.000 You have many, many, many, many art pieces published.
01:10:18.000 You have journalism things that you've done.
01:10:20.000 It's worked out for you, all this romance.
01:10:22.000 But for some people, this is not happening for them.
01:10:25.000 And they're like, God damn it.
01:10:26.000 I just think it would be better if there was no secrets.
01:10:30.000 If you're that person and it wasn't working out for you, probably if there were no secrets you would just have the crushing disappointment of realizing either no one was thinking of you or they were thinking bad things about you and it would just make you more unhappy.
01:10:41.000 Maybe.
01:10:42.000 But...
01:10:44.000 Is what we are as human beings currently, is that a static state?
01:10:48.000 And is this a state that we can expect to exist in sort of this form, speaking with our mouths, making noises with our faces, interpreting it in our own minds?
01:11:08.000 No, no fucking way.
01:11:19.000 Plus thousand years later or whatever the fuck it was, whatever has led us to improve to become what we are today is a continuous cycle.
01:11:28.000 It's not going to stop.
01:11:29.000 I think that this idea that what we've got right now, like, oh, the romance of not knowing and, you know, it's amazing and it all works out.
01:11:37.000 Well, it's fucking temporary.
01:11:39.000 This is a little...
01:11:40.000 When we look back in time, too, the amount of time that we've spent in this state currently, the internet state, has been so brief but so transcendent Absolutely.
01:11:51.000 The most transcendent thing, I mean, I think as much or more than the printing press.
01:11:56.000 Probably more, my god.
01:11:59.000 One of the really good articles I was reading about the refugee stuff is by this Iraqi journalist that I always plug because he's so brilliant, Raith Abdul Ahad.
01:12:08.000 And he did this piece about people making the trip.
01:12:12.000 And one of the things he talked about is that this was a trip that when he was a young man in Iraq, he had tried to pay a smuggler to do and the smuggler defrauded him and he didn't get to do it.
01:12:20.000 But it was all under the control of smugglers.
01:12:23.000 Whereas now, if you have a cell phone, once you get from Turkey to Greece, once you do that little four-hour boat ride, you just put on the GPS maps on your cell phone and you walk.
01:12:33.000 Wow.
01:12:34.000 You don't need smugglers after that.
01:12:36.000 Isn't that crazy?
01:12:37.000 It completely upended this entire really disgusting, nasty business.
01:12:43.000 Well, similar in a lot of ways to the business of sneaking people over from Mexico.
01:12:47.000 You know, I have a friend who's been living in America for more than 20 years, because I've known him for...
01:13:07.000 Jesus, yeah.
01:13:21.000 Yeah, and they did it through the middle of the night, and they eventually got to some sort of border town, whether it was in Arizona or whatever, and they made their way and infiltrated into cities and eventually found jobs and barely survived, barely fed themselves.
01:13:37.000 And fuck, man, you just imagine that life.
01:13:41.000 And then there's all these people, we've got to tighten up our borders!
01:13:44.000 What the fuck, man?
01:13:45.000 Like, tighten up the border shit.
01:13:47.000 I mean...
01:13:48.000 Trump's, like, idiot idea of that wall that's not even, like, physically possible to build because he would have to go through all these, like, rivers and take over people's land.
01:13:57.000 How do we get presidential candidates who, not that they're stupid, not that they're crazy, but who, like, fundamentally deny physical reality?
01:14:04.000 Like, this is where we are right now.
01:14:06.000 Yeah, I don't think he necessarily is a presidential candidate.
01:14:09.000 I don't buy it.
01:14:10.000 You think it's to make the other ones look moderate and reasonable?
01:14:13.000 No, I don't think it's some grand conspiracy.
01:14:15.000 I think it's him riding this crazy wave of attention and trying to think in his own mind that it's justified because he's shining light on these important issues in a way that only he can because he's independently wealthy and he's not bound to You know,
01:14:31.000 the wishes of his constituents.
01:14:33.000 He can just kind of go out there and say, I want to put a giant wall up and call it the Trump wall.
01:14:38.000 And we're going to keep out the Mexicans!
01:14:41.000 Yeah!
01:14:41.000 And meanwhile, everybody wants to fucking kill him and his face is falling off his bones.
01:14:46.000 It's so bizarre.
01:14:48.000 It's so Coen Brothers-esque that he really does seem like satire.
01:14:53.000 I mean, he's like the ultimate American satire president candidate.
01:14:59.000 Did you ever interview him like back before this?
01:15:02.000 No, I've never met him.
01:15:03.000 Nothing.
01:15:03.000 I once confronted him at a press conference in Dubai.
01:15:07.000 It's like one of my finest moments.
01:15:09.000 No, I was really scared because Dubai is a police state.
01:15:12.000 There's no free speech there.
01:15:14.000 They'll lock you up.
01:15:16.000 They're rich enough.
01:15:17.000 They don't really care about your American passport that much.
01:15:19.000 And so I was at this press conference where he had these golf courses that he was licensing his name to.
01:15:27.000 And I had some intel that the guys that were building the golf courses were getting 200 bucks a month to do construction work.
01:15:33.000 And like the Emirates, the average salary of an Emirati is, I think it's like 60,000 a year, I think.
01:15:40.000 And so he gets 200 a month, you know, to do like hard ass construction work.
01:15:44.000 And so I get up during the press conference where he's getting his ass kissed and I wave my hand around and I say, Mr. Trump, you've been saying how You know, this all stands for luxury and your construction guys are getting $200 a month.
01:15:57.000 Are you satisfied with that?
01:15:58.000 And his mouth fucking shriveled.
01:16:00.000 I've never seen it shriveled with this little tiny rosebud of hate.
01:16:03.000 And I got so yelled at.
01:16:05.000 He yelled at you?
01:16:06.000 He didn't yell at me.
01:16:07.000 The underling yelled at me.
01:16:09.000 Who's the underling?
01:16:10.000 From the Emirati PR firm that was there.
01:16:12.000 What did they say?
01:16:13.000 That's not an appropriate question!
01:16:15.000 How is that not appropriate?
01:16:16.000 I know.
01:16:17.000 And then the next question was, Mr. Trump, you stand for luxury and Dubai stands for luxury.
01:16:21.000 Is that why you and Dubai like each other?
01:16:24.000 Tough, tough stuff.
01:16:25.000 So did he answer you?
01:16:27.000 No, he didn't.
01:16:27.000 He didn't answer me.
01:16:28.000 He just, like, mouth shriveled.
01:16:30.000 And, like, Ivanka's mouth went all small.
01:16:32.000 Like, everyone's mouth went really small with anger.
01:16:34.000 Ooh, Ivanka, so this is a long time ago, right?
01:16:36.000 Ooh, is that the drawing you made?
01:16:37.000 Yeah, yeah, that's the drawing I made.
01:16:39.000 He was so angry at me, because I took, like, a little start-up to just picture of him.
01:16:44.000 But, yeah, he was, like, there talking about how New York should be more like Dubai, because in Dubai everything was perfect.
01:16:50.000 What?
01:16:51.000 Yeah, yeah, he, like, the ass-kissing.
01:16:53.000 He said that he built the greatest architectural buildings in New York.
01:16:56.000 I beg to differ.
01:16:58.000 Wow, he really said that?
01:17:00.000 You know, my friend Joey Diaz grew up in New York and he said one of the things that people forget about Donald Trump is all the disputes that he had with small local construction companies that they used for projects.
01:17:11.000 And now these people wound up going out of business and they couldn't battle him financially.
01:17:18.000 There's like this wave of people that hate him in that whole construction business.
01:17:22.000 I don't know who's right and who's wrong about those disputes, but The idea that you could take that model, which is already problematic in America, and then take it and wrap it up in a giant way in Dubai.
01:17:36.000 That fucking piece that Vice did on those people that are in Dubai that are trapped, where they take their passports.
01:17:44.000 I think I did a big piece on that.
01:17:46.000 Did you?
01:17:47.000 Yeah.
01:17:48.000 Yeah, there was a...
01:17:49.000 How long ago was...
01:17:50.000 Last summer?
01:17:51.000 No, this was a few years ago, like maybe six or seven years ago.
01:17:54.000 Oh man, nice.
01:17:55.000 There was a camp that they went to and these men were just openly weeping.
01:18:00.000 They were showing this like hole in the ground where they have to shit.
01:18:03.000 And they were showing how poor the water is.
01:18:05.000 And they had promised them a substantial amount of money per month.
01:18:09.000 And they were coming over from India and the Philippines, a lot of third world countries.
01:18:14.000 And once they got there, they would take their passports away and then reduce their salary dramatically, you know, and they couldn't leave and they were forcing them to build these structures.
01:18:25.000 Exactly.
01:18:25.000 It's totally like that.
01:18:27.000 And then the other really fucked up thing is that these guys, they're not passive.
01:18:32.000 They try to strike and stuff, especially very often, not only do they reduce their salaries, they just don't pay them.
01:18:37.000 And can you imagine you have a wife and kids at home who are depending on you to go to another country and make money for the family, and then you just don't get paid for three months?
01:18:46.000 It's like breaking a whole family.
01:18:48.000 And so these guys will do strikes, they'll do sit-downs in front of the buses, and then they haul them off to jail and deport them when they do that.
01:18:54.000 It's so scary.
01:18:56.000 It's, again, what we're talking about, the spectrum of human behavior.
01:18:59.000 I mean, it's like a few steps away from being a serial killer, but it's just this sort of pathological detachment from compassion, you know, that you don't care about these people that are...
01:19:13.000 Risking their lives to make these giant buildings that these royal people are going to walk on roses that they throw at their feet and step into these things and go skiing in the middle of summer in these gigantic buildings they make.
01:19:25.000 They make these crazy fucking structures over there because they almost have an unlimited budget.
01:19:30.000 It's almost like they have an idea in their head.
01:19:33.000 You know, I would like to fly indoors.
01:19:36.000 And they're like, okay, we're going to build you a mile-high fucking gigantic building where you could fly inside.
01:19:43.000 And then you have planes that you could fly indoors.
01:19:47.000 I shouldn't even have said that because someone in Dubai is probably listening and ding!
01:19:52.000 A light bulb went off in their head.
01:19:53.000 Yes!
01:19:54.000 An indoor flight course!
01:19:57.000 And what's so strange is I was prepared to hate how Dubai looked.
01:20:02.000 I hate how Dubai is.
01:20:04.000 But I was prepared to aesthetically hate it as well as ethically hate it.
01:20:08.000 But what's weird is when you go there, it's beautiful.
01:20:10.000 That's the thing.
01:20:11.000 It's like, I remember, I was looking at that building, like the Shard, you know, the world's tallest building, Alberge.
01:20:17.000 Did you go in it?
01:20:18.000 I went onto the ground floor and I bought a $20 cup of coffee.
01:20:22.000 $20?
01:20:22.000 Yeah, it was $20.
01:20:23.000 Oh my god, how does it taste?
01:20:25.000 Like a fucking cup of iced coffee.
01:20:28.000 That was just sort of a Veblen object.
01:20:31.000 But so I was like going into...
01:20:33.000 I was going into it prepared to really aesthetically judge it too.
01:20:37.000 And the thing is, it's so beautiful.
01:20:39.000 And then I was remembering, I was like, Versailles is also beautiful.
01:20:43.000 And look at how that was made.
01:20:45.000 And it was this weird thing, because you think about how splendor is always made and how the most beautiful things in the world always are constructed.
01:20:52.000 And you definitely go there and you're like, this is the city of the future.
01:20:56.000 And this is the new aristocrats.
01:20:58.000 And this is beautiful.
01:20:59.000 And it's all being built by slaves who are dying to build it.
01:21:03.000 Well, I don't know if it's the future, but it's definitely the future of that area.
01:21:06.000 But they just have this strange world where it was incredibly poor up until just a few decades ago.
01:21:13.000 And then all of a sudden, they start pumping oil out of that place, and the money is astronomical.
01:21:22.000 And the change in the amount of money that area has, and the few that have it, the disparity of wealth is just unimaginable.
01:21:32.000 One of the kind of interesting things that they did in Abu Dhabi, which actually I kind of admire it, is that in a lot of countries when they get oil money, like someone steals it, you know, up top.
01:21:43.000 But in Abu Dhabi, what they did was they gave citizens a lot of entitlements to stuff like you get free education if you're an Emirati, you get free health care.
01:21:52.000 Housing, get a stipend.
01:21:54.000 Emirati women are like super, super educated.
01:21:56.000 Most of the PhDs are Emirati women.
01:21:59.000 So like, that's awesome.
01:22:00.000 But the thing is, the flip side of that is like, citizens are only 10% of the population.
01:22:04.000 And it's like 90% of the people, the people who do everything, like the engineers, the shop workers, the maids, the, you know, construction dudes, like the people who do every manner of work are not citizens and have no rights to anything.
01:22:18.000 Wow.
01:22:19.000 That's a trip.
01:22:21.000 We're, you know, we're looking on the outside at that place.
01:22:25.000 I mean, I've talked to people that I've been to Dubai and I've been to Abu Dhabi.
01:22:29.000 I was there for a UFC event and, you know, without getting into anything political, it's beautiful.
01:22:36.000 You know, you're like, wow, these people have done a great job in constructing these things.
01:22:40.000 But the guy...
01:22:42.000 The guys that I was with, some of them went to Dubai because we had the night off and I was tired.
01:22:50.000 I decided to stay home.
01:22:51.000 They went to Dubai.
01:22:52.000 They were like, ah, we're going to go to a bar and have just some places you can go to drink.
01:22:55.000 You have to drink in certain places because it's illegal to have alcohol, but there's some sort of weird loophole.
01:23:01.000 And they said it was all Russian prostitutes.
01:23:04.000 They said it's just like these predatory coyote women that had like crossed over and just like looking to just pocket cash from banging all these rich dudes.
01:23:16.000 I was like, whoa.
01:23:18.000 My friend went to a bar and he said, I'm not bullshitting.
01:23:20.000 This bar might have been 80% hookers.
01:23:23.000 And I go, that might, he goes, I've never seen anything like it in my life.
01:23:26.000 Yeah, women go over there to make some serious money.
01:23:29.000 I bet you can.
01:23:30.000 I bet you can fucking clean it up.
01:23:33.000 But it's probably really dangerous too, right?
01:23:36.000 You know, I never really did research on sex work in Dubai or in Abu Dhabi.
01:23:41.000 I know mostly about construction work and something about the maids and not so much.
01:23:45.000 But I think for anyone who's not a citizen, it's dangerous because you don't have any real rights if you're not a citizen.
01:23:52.000 Yeah, I remember.
01:23:53.000 I think it was a British couple that were making out on the beach and they were arrested.
01:23:57.000 They were just kissing.
01:23:58.000 But they were openly showing affection on the beach and they were thrown in jail.
01:24:02.000 I'm like, well, how about this?
01:24:04.000 This is another one.
01:24:05.000 This is the craziest one.
01:24:06.000 There was a British man who he had...
01:24:11.000 Eating a poppy seed bagel and poppy seeds will you will test positive for heroin if you eat like it's trace amounts but obviously it's not enough to be psychoactive but it's enough to show up in a really comprehensive blood examination so they tested this guy and He tested positive for heroin and they put him in a fucking cell He had a poppy seed bagel at Heathrow Airport,
01:24:38.000 and that bagel got him locked up in a jail cell.
01:24:41.000 Like, whoa!
01:24:43.000 There's another woman who is an executive at Brillstein Gray, which is a very prominent Los Angeles entertainment group.
01:24:52.000 And she had...
01:24:54.000 What is that shit that people take?
01:24:56.000 It's a natural thing.
01:24:57.000 Oh, you take it when you want to go to bed.
01:25:00.000 Valerian?
01:25:01.000 No, no, no, no.
01:25:02.000 It wasn't that.
01:25:02.000 It was melatonin.
01:25:04.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:25:04.000 She had melatonin.
01:25:05.000 Fucking melatonin?
01:25:06.000 Yes!
01:25:07.000 You can't have melatonin.
01:25:08.000 They arrested her, locked her up, took her passport, put her in a jail cell for fucking melatonin.
01:25:14.000 And then, you know, somehow or another, somehow got word of it and they got her out eventually.
01:25:19.000 But what a terrifying moment it must have been for her.
01:25:22.000 There was another guy who had a marijuana seed...
01:25:25.000 Or a stem or a piece of marijuana that was wedged in between the tread of his shoes.
01:25:32.000 That was it.
01:25:33.000 And that was enough to put him in jail.
01:25:35.000 And he was gonna be sentenced for some fucking astronomical amount of time.
01:25:39.000 And I don't know what happened to that poor guy, but unfortunately for him, he was a black guy with dreadlocks from England.
01:25:46.000 And they were like, uh-uh, dude.
01:25:49.000 Forever.
01:25:50.000 Cage.
01:25:51.000 Forever.
01:25:52.000 Yeah, it's a really, really, really racist country there.
01:25:55.000 Here we go right here.
01:25:56.000 Some of the horror stories have been reported by the BBC. Four-year jail term for possession of 0.003 grams of cannabis stuck to the bottom of his shoe.
01:26:05.000 That's the guy.
01:26:06.000 That's Keith Brown.
01:26:08.000 Robert Dalton on trial for alleged possession of 0.3 grams of cannabis.
01:26:14.000 0.03.
01:26:15.000 Unnamed 20-year-old on trial for alleged...
01:26:18.000 This is all cannabis, mostly.
01:26:20.000 I had this one dude I met there.
01:26:21.000 He's Emirati.
01:26:22.000 And he was really interesting.
01:26:24.000 His name is Ahmed Mansour.
01:26:25.000 And he...
01:26:28.000 I mean, like, he's so brave, right?
01:26:30.000 Because you have so many privileges.
01:26:31.000 Like, as an Emirati, especially he came from, like, a good family and everything.
01:26:34.000 You know, you can really just coast if you're Emirati and you're, you know, from a well-off family.
01:26:38.000 And he made a web forum that let people discuss, basically discuss the royal family, frankly.
01:26:46.000 And it also, it let people discuss religion, kind of frankly.
01:26:48.000 And if you were an atheist, you could talk about it on the web forum.
01:26:51.000 And they fucking, they locked him up for, was he in jail for...
01:26:56.000 I have to check this, but I want to say it was around nine months, and they infected him with scabies when he was in jail.
01:27:01.000 And then when they let him out- They infected him purposely?
01:27:03.000 Yeah, that's what he said.
01:27:04.000 He said that they gave him a blanket that had scabies on it.
01:27:08.000 And then when he was out, he had this series of unfortunate events that happened.
01:27:14.000 Over $100,000 accidentally disappeared from his bank account, and no one knows how it got missing.
01:27:20.000 And then, like, on two occasions, guys just sort of jumped out and beat the shit out of him, and no one knows who they were, you know?
01:27:26.000 It's a mystery.
01:27:27.000 And his car just gets stolen all the time, and the tires keep getting air taken out of it, and, you know, magical mystery.
01:27:33.000 No one knows who's behind that.
01:27:35.000 Fuck.
01:27:36.000 Yeah, could you imagine if you, like, pissed off some royal family and they just hired some dude and they pay him and your job is to fuck with this guy forever.
01:27:44.000 Like, that's it.
01:27:45.000 That's your job.
01:27:46.000 Or, you know, if you're, like, some sort of a rich billionaire character, you could hire a bunch of people.
01:27:52.000 You can have a whole team, you know, and their job is just to fuck with people.
01:27:56.000 There's this one guy, I don't like him, let's go get him.
01:28:00.000 That wouldn't be hard.
01:28:01.000 Like, if you're like some Trump guy, and you've got billions of dollars, and someone like Molly Crabapple makes you feel like shit at some Dubai press event, and you're like, fuck this bitch, this is what we're gonna do, I'm gonna hire a team, and I'm gonna fuck with Molly Crabapple's life.
01:28:15.000 I mean, that's a reality.
01:28:17.000 Like, someone who's that wealthy, they could do something like that.
01:28:20.000 That's scary shit.
01:28:21.000 Yeah, they definitely, definitely, definitely could.
01:28:23.000 Yeah, they could hire somebody just every time you go out to your car, your tires are flat.
01:28:26.000 Like, what the fuck?
01:28:29.000 Fuckers!
01:28:29.000 At a certain point, though, you'd probably put up, like, a little cam on your car, and, you know...
01:28:33.000 Yeah, or you'd hire some people, too.
01:28:35.000 Yeah, exactly, and it'd be like, war of the proxies.
01:28:38.000 War of the proxies, that's it, right?
01:28:40.000 Yeah, I don't know.
01:28:42.000 Have you gone to any places that were positive in your journalism escapades?
01:28:48.000 I love Istanbul.
01:28:49.000 Istanbul is one of my favorite cities ever.
01:28:52.000 It's just so gorgeous and it's so exciting.
01:28:55.000 You walk down Istiklal Jadasi, which is Sort of the main street in a neighborhood called Bayolu.
01:29:01.000 And it's like there's like lights and all these couples hand in hand.
01:29:05.000 Everyone's playing music.
01:29:06.000 There's like kids selling flower crowns.
01:29:08.000 It's just like it feels like the sort of boulevard that every other boulevard in the world was trying to be.
01:29:13.000 It's so magic.
01:29:15.000 And I mean, I could I could just walk around Istanbul like any time of day or night and I would never not like have my heart beat fast for that city.
01:29:24.000 Wow.
01:29:25.000 So that's your favorite spot?
01:29:26.000 That's my favorite spot.
01:29:27.000 Do you think you could ever be an expat?
01:29:29.000 Move to Istanbul and...
01:29:30.000 They're arresting a lot.
01:29:31.000 They have a bad record, unfortunately, for arresting journalists there.
01:29:34.000 One of my colleagues at Vice, this brilliant Kurdish dude, Mohamed Rasul, he is currently in jail right now for doing journalism in Turkey.
01:29:48.000 And Vice is trying really hard to get him out, but he is rotting in a jail cell.
01:29:53.000 And they claim that he is ISIS because he used encryption.
01:29:57.000 He's a Kurdish dude.
01:29:58.000 He's a Kurdish dude that covers all of the anti-ISIS stuff.
01:30:01.000 He's not ISIS. This is so embarrassing and inane.
01:30:05.000 And yeah, he's rotting in a jail cell there.
01:30:07.000 How long has he been there?
01:30:08.000 Oh God, it's over...
01:30:10.000 I think it's going to be going on three months now.
01:30:13.000 And I don't think they've even really charged him yet.
01:30:14.000 They've just leaked statements to the press.
01:30:17.000 Whoa.
01:30:19.000 But that aside, I, you know, the political repression aside, I really do find Istanbul to be a marvelous city.
01:30:27.000 No place is perfect.
01:30:28.000 They charge it.
01:30:29.000 So what is his actual, what is their grievance with him?
01:30:32.000 What is the actual issue?
01:30:34.000 He was going with these two British vice journalists and they were covering clashes between the Turkish government and Kurds in the south and they picked them up doing that.
01:30:44.000 So they just decided they didn't like him, like what he's doing, causing trouble?
01:30:48.000 Well, they've been actually like deporting and fucking with a lot of journalists who have been doing this.
01:30:53.000 But I think it's like the two British guys got out because, you know, they're British.
01:30:58.000 Whereas if you're an Iraqi Kurd, like, who's going to be the person putting pressure on Turkey for you?
01:31:03.000 Well, I'm sure you're aware of that Saudi Arabian blogger that's been beaten repeatedly.
01:31:08.000 Right.
01:31:09.000 Yeah.
01:31:10.000 That's a fucking horrible story, too.
01:31:12.000 That's one of the weirdest aspects of the United States relationship with Saudi Arabia.
01:31:17.000 It's like, we'll talk about all the atrocities that are committed by all these different countries, but Saudi Arabia's like...
01:31:22.000 Yeah, they're moderate.
01:31:24.000 And meanwhile, they sentenced a poet to death for poetry in Saudi recently.
01:31:29.000 How bad was the poetry, though?
01:31:30.000 Was it like, jam, slam, comedy, you know those things?
01:31:33.000 Why are you poetry shaming?
01:31:35.000 Why do you have to free verse shame right now?
01:31:37.000 Free verse?
01:31:38.000 Yeah, free verse.
01:31:39.000 Is that what they call it?
01:31:40.000 No, isn't free verse when you make poetry that doesn't rhyme or have any meter or anything?
01:31:44.000 I thought that's a haiku.
01:31:45.000 No, haiku is a short one, right?
01:31:47.000 I'm not much into poetry, but I remember I went to a poetry slam in Venice once, which is the perfect place to go because people take themselves so fucking seriously.
01:31:57.000 And I was with a buddy of mine and we were high as you should ever be while you're in public walking around talking to people, like barely aware of reality.
01:32:06.000 And we walked by this place and it was a poetry slam and I'm like, we have to go inside, we have to go inside.
01:32:13.000 And we went inside and we were both like biting our hands trying not to laugh because it was just so preposterous.
01:32:19.000 You know, that really just pretentious, save the world type poetry.
01:32:26.000 Yeah, yeah, I do, I do.
01:32:27.000 Done by 20 year old white guys with dreadlocks.
01:32:29.000 Yeah, yeah, I do.
01:32:32.000 I do.
01:32:33.000 I mean, I think as a visual artist, I have a similar thing when I see really, really bad artwork and I'm just like, not only are you shaming yourself, you're shaming my whole profession here.
01:32:44.000 Yeah, but you know what?
01:32:45.000 I also, as I've gotten older and I've sort of...
01:32:50.000 Understand the nuance of life like what this guy's doing his stupid shame sham slam whatever poetry What he really is doing is just trying to express himself and he's developing as a person and right now It's kind of ridiculous to other people that are maybe a little bit more Well-versed in the ways of the world and with a more social experience But what he's trying to do is like he sees the world is wrong and he wants to get social brownie points by pointing it out and you know and people clap and cheer and he's so he sat down on this loose Leave Binder and wrote
01:33:21.000 all this stuff out and he just feels like he's really good.
01:33:24.000 And one day he'll look back at that and go, what a fucking moron I was.
01:33:27.000 Just like I'll look back at, I have a comedy notebook from 1990 and I should probably burn it in case someone breaks in my house and finds it.
01:33:35.000 Dude, if you die, then someone will publish the collected papers of Joe Rogan and this will be your most famous thing.
01:33:42.000 It's like a A bit in there about Wonder Woman, like trying to explain Wonder Woman.
01:33:46.000 It's so bad.
01:33:47.000 But I was, you know, 21 years old or whatever the fuck I was at the time.
01:33:51.000 It's like, it's just, that's what you, when you suck and when you're young, I mean, it takes a while to get good at anything.
01:33:57.000 I sucked for so many years.
01:33:59.000 Sometimes I look back at my old drawings and I'm like, how did I ever get hired as an artist?
01:34:03.000 What delusional process did I ever think that I would be an artist?
01:34:07.000 Putting these things out there and again and again and again in the face of very deserved rejection for many years.
01:34:12.000 But...
01:34:12.000 It worked out, right?
01:34:14.000 Because if you just keep chipping away at it...
01:34:17.000 Eventually, eventually get through.
01:34:19.000 And I tried to actually really write about that in my book because I feel like sometimes a lot of artists, they front and they act like, oh, I was just really good from the start and then it was really easy.
01:34:27.000 And I was like, no, I sucked from the start and it was really hard.
01:34:31.000 Yeah, most comedians will tell you that they suck from the start, except the ones that aren't that good, which will claim that they were always awesome.
01:34:39.000 I think all my friends that are really good, they'll tell you they're fucking, they were terrible.
01:34:44.000 I have two young daughters, and one of the cool things is watching their art, like they're really into art, especially my seven-year-old is really into it.
01:34:51.000 She draws every day.
01:34:52.000 That's so cool.
01:34:52.000 And I watch her early stuff, like I save all her stuff, or at least representations, like some of it.
01:35:01.000 and Watching like their early like control of her motor skills in her hands from the time she was like three to four years later This just dramatic difference in what she's ability, you know her ability to draw things and draw representations and figure out like perspective and sizes and We were going through this book yesterday.
01:35:23.000 She has this How to draw figures book.
01:35:26.000 And it was the weirdest fucking thing.
01:35:28.000 Because it was these princesses.
01:35:31.000 And she's trying to draw princesses.
01:35:33.000 And I'm looking at the book.
01:35:36.000 And we're going through it together.
01:35:37.000 And it's like one of those books where you have a framework.
01:35:41.000 There's balls and sticks.
01:35:43.000 And you try to make the framework.
01:35:45.000 And then you add the clothes to the framework.
01:35:47.000 Yeah, totally.
01:35:48.000 But the women's legs were like...
01:35:51.000 More than twice as long as they should have been.
01:36:08.000 Yeah.
01:36:09.000 Well, that's got to be weird for, because it doesn't seem that way for men.
01:36:12.000 Like, I was looking at the representations of men.
01:36:15.000 They're fairly proportionate.
01:36:16.000 But with women, it was all these insanely long legs and insanely skinny bodies.
01:36:22.000 And I was like, this is fucking strange.
01:36:25.000 So much so that I had to point it out to her.
01:36:27.000 You know, she's like, you know, she's drawing it.
01:36:30.000 I go...
01:36:31.000 Well, here's the deal.
01:36:33.000 You can draw it like this.
01:36:35.000 One of the beautiful things about art is you can do whatever you want.
01:36:37.000 If you want to make people that have giant hands that are the size of those foam number ones that people wear at a football game, you could totally do that.
01:36:43.000 No one can stop you.
01:36:46.000 Drawing is your expression, whatever you want to do.
01:36:48.000 But if you want to draw like a real person, And so then I started showing her a real human body.
01:36:54.000 I'm like, okay, I'm going to stand up, and I'll stand up next to the wall.
01:36:56.000 And what we're going to do is we're going to mark on the wall where the top of my head is and where my waist is.
01:37:01.000 Oh, that's so cool that you did that with her.
01:37:02.000 That's awesome.
01:37:03.000 And so we went from the top of my head to the waist, and then we went from the waist down to the feet.
01:37:08.000 And I said, and you notice that they're pretty much the same, or at least close.
01:37:12.000 But the women in these cartoon things you're supposed to draw were no bullshit.
01:37:16.000 There was twice as much length in their legs as there was from their waist up to their head.
01:37:21.000 And she was like, well, why do they do that?
01:37:23.000 And I go, well, some people think that it looks better to make people that aren't real, that are longer than reality.
01:37:30.000 But why do we accept that?
01:37:32.000 Because if there was a woman and she had a normal proportion body but enormous tits, Just freakish tits.
01:37:41.000 Like, everybody would look at that and go, what the fuck are you making these kids draw?
01:37:44.000 You know?
01:37:45.000 But for whatever reason, like having the...
01:37:48.000 And by the way, some people have freakish tits.
01:37:51.000 Like, there's people that for whatever reason...
01:37:54.000 Like, there's that poor dude who can't go to the airport without getting frisked because he has this giant hog.
01:37:59.000 He has, like, some 20-inch dick.
01:38:00.000 He's got the world's largest dick.
01:38:02.000 And, like, they always check his pants because they think he's carrying drugs or something.
01:38:07.000 Well, there's women out there that are just naturally born with enormous breasts, and there's nothing they can do about it.
01:38:11.000 There's no one born with...
01:38:13.000 There's no one six feet tall, and only two feet of them are upper body, and the rest of it is legs.
01:38:19.000 That just doesn't exist.
01:38:20.000 Yeah, no, it's crazy.
01:38:22.000 And even when I was at art school, we would have a different formula for drawing figures, and there was like...
01:38:30.000 They would measure it in heads.
01:38:31.000 So it's like this figure is nine heads.
01:38:33.000 And a fashion figure, which what they called it, which is, you know, the figure for a fashion illustration, was like so many more heads than like any other figure.
01:38:41.000 And so it was like that crazy elongated thing and exactly what you're saying with like the crazy daddy long legs legs.
01:38:47.000 It's very strange because for men, I've never talked to a man who understands that look because men are not attracted.
01:38:55.000 I mean, I'm sure everybody varies, right?
01:38:57.000 But most men are not attractive to these stick figure people.
01:39:01.000 But women are expected to be stick figure people to be models.
01:39:05.000 It's one of the weirdest things.
01:39:07.000 And then women think that in order to be attractive, they have to be like these media representations of women, so they have to starve themselves.
01:39:14.000 And then men are like, no, don't do that.
01:39:16.000 No one likes that.
01:39:17.000 But it's like there's this weird disconnect between what the opposite sex or, I mean, I don't know, I can't speak for lesbians, obviously, but what the opposite sex finds attractive and the representations of attractive women.
01:39:31.000 Sucked in cheeks, basically like on death's door.
01:39:35.000 Like, yeah, she's hot.
01:39:37.000 Like, no, that's weird.
01:39:38.000 It's weird to see someone all cracked out and skinny like that being the most obvious representation of a beautiful person in nice clothes.
01:39:49.000 I mean, I think it's, you know, fashion models aren't for men, you know, or they're not for straight men.
01:39:55.000 They're supposed to appeal to women who are buying the clothing.
01:39:58.000 But do they even...
01:40:00.000 I don't...
01:40:00.000 I mean, I think, you know, fashion...
01:40:03.000 I think, you know, women of all sizes, skinny, skinny, whatever, I think, you know, I'll be super beautiful.
01:40:08.000 As long as that's really you.
01:40:09.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:40:10.000 As long as you're not, like, harming yourself to do it.
01:40:12.000 But I think that...
01:40:14.000 I don't know.
01:40:15.000 I think the idea is that you can just hang any clothing on them and it doesn't affect the hang of the clothing.
01:40:21.000 So it's almost like they're as close to it being...
01:40:25.000 Like a coat hanger is possible.
01:40:27.000 I think that's the theoretical underpinnings of it.
01:40:30.000 But yeah, it's true.
01:40:31.000 Like if you look at like a Playboy model or like a model for like, you know, like Black Men's Magazine or, you know, like a model for Maxim, like they're like these super fit young women, you know, who like have like really good like muscles and are really curvy.
01:40:46.000 Yeah, well, people, like, men are naturally attracted to women with a certain amount of body fat.
01:40:50.000 It's a natural thing, because to be healthy, like, the whole idea of breasts and butts and hips being attractive is because, genetically, women who have those things will carry children better and will be more likely to be able to nourish those children because they're healthy.
01:41:07.000 It's a total genetic thing.
01:41:09.000 So much so, this is the weirdest aspect of it, so much so that if a woman has Fake boobs.
01:41:16.000 Like, you know they're fake.
01:41:18.000 You know.
01:41:19.000 There's no disconnect at all.
01:41:20.000 You're absolutely aware that she has gone through surgery to cut her skin, stuff bags of water in there that make them stick out.
01:41:29.000 You're like, oh, but they stick out more.
01:41:31.000 Like, men will be more attracted sexually.
01:41:34.000 And the sexual attraction is supposed to, at least, represent wanting to breed with that person.
01:41:41.000 Like, you are not just tricked.
01:41:43.000 You're tricking yourself.
01:41:47.000 Fake boobs are one of the weirdest things of all time, if you really stop and look at it.
01:41:51.000 If aliens came down from another planet, or even historians, because I guarantee you, we were talking about Bradley Manning and Chelsea Manning.
01:42:00.000 There's going to come a time in whatever not-so-distant future, the next hundred years, where they're just going to be able to turn you into a woman.
01:42:07.000 You're going to say, like, I don't want to be a woman anymore.
01:42:09.000 I'd like to be a man.
01:42:10.000 They'll make you a man for a year.
01:42:12.000 And you're like, eh, I like being Molly better.
01:42:14.000 You go back to being Molly instead of Mike.
01:42:16.000 Molly and Mike, the show, right?
01:42:19.000 I think they're going to be able to do that with breasts.
01:42:21.000 They're going to be able to do that with everything.
01:42:22.000 They're going to be able to manipulate genetics to the point where...
01:42:25.000 Have you ever seen or listened to this Radiolab episode on CRISPR? I haven't.
01:42:30.000 No, what's that?
01:42:30.000 CRISPR is a new method of manipulating genetics that they have invented.
01:42:38.000 It's a really super complicated thing that I'm going to butcher.
01:42:41.000 But they've invented it by studying the DNA of viruses and they figured out how to utilize that sort of method to manipulate eventually, at least, human DNA. To the point where they're going to be able to change your traits.
01:42:57.000 They're going to be able to change so many different things.
01:42:59.000 Introduce genes into specific areas of your body and fix problems or change things that you don't like.
01:43:06.000 They're going to be able to do some fucking freaky shit.
01:43:08.000 And this is just one invention.
01:43:10.000 I think 2012 it was invented, and by the time 2032 rolls around, who the fuck knows what they're gonna have?
01:43:19.000 I think we're really close to be able to just completely manipulate human bodies.
01:43:24.000 But the point being, when historians go back and they look, At fake boobs, they're going to be like, what the fuck were these people doing?
01:43:31.000 Like, how weird is this?
01:43:32.000 There's going to be a Smithsonian that has like boxes of like silicone, and this is the early days, and this is when they went to saline, and you know, we're going to look at that stuff going, what a strange time to be alive.
01:43:45.000 The thing is, though, with trickery and matters of aesthetics, I don't even want to call it trickery.
01:43:49.000 I mean, there's all sorts of things.
01:43:51.000 You can totally admire, think a guy looks really hot in a sharp suit, even though you know it's not really his skin, you know what I mean?
01:43:59.000 There's a whole visual appreciation of other people that doesn't necessarily just have to do with what's quote-unquote real or what's your genetic heritage.
01:44:08.000 That's really true.
01:44:10.000 Like, clothes are a great example.
01:44:11.000 That's a really good example.
01:44:12.000 Because that is weird.
01:44:14.000 Like, you see someone who's dressed sharp, and you go, ooh, man, he looks great in that suit.
01:44:18.000 Like, that's a beautiful vest.
01:44:19.000 Like, wow, that looks awesome on him.
01:44:22.000 That's a strange thing.
01:44:23.000 Like, you look good with stuff on you.
01:44:25.000 Yeah, exactly.
01:44:26.000 You could hang stuff on you that makes you look good or professional or authoritative or all of these other things, even though, like, they're just, like, stuff that you're wearing.
01:44:34.000 I wonder if that's the same with hermit crabs.
01:44:38.000 Oh my god.
01:44:38.000 If they pick out a good shell.
01:44:40.000 Could you imagine someone's like, I'm wearing the really slick, cool shell.
01:44:43.000 I'm going to get all the girl hermit crabs right now.
01:44:45.000 Yeah, probably, right?
01:44:46.000 There's some weird things in nature with animals doing things like that.
01:44:50.000 How about animals that can actually...
01:44:52.000 Have you ever paid attention to octopus at all?
01:44:56.000 Octopi?
01:44:56.000 You know, I'm like, I'm pretty shamefully ignorant.
01:44:59.000 You might have to educate me here.
01:45:00.000 I had, well, apparently cuttlefish are just as bizarre, if not more.
01:45:04.000 But my friend Remy Warren is a, um, he's a host of a show called Apex Predator, where they, um, they monitor, they sort of, um, Try to emulate the different attributes that certain predators have and how how they survive and see like if there's like some human version of that and and they like Check out like how it's called heron that those tall birds her
01:45:34.000 herons herons.
01:45:35.000 How do you say that?
01:45:37.000 Heron?
01:45:37.000 Herons?
01:45:38.000 Like how they walk with their crazy long legs and then stab at the water looking for like frogs and shit and he did one on octopuses and out of all the different animals we were talking about he was like you know there's all these cool animals they were talking about like how wolves will chase down packs of elk and how they corner them and And these canyons and draws and how they figure out how to trap them.
01:45:59.000 It's really fascinating.
01:46:00.000 But when he started talking about octopus, he's like, dude, you have never...
01:46:04.000 They are fucking aliens.
01:46:05.000 Look at these things.
01:46:06.000 Look how they can change their colors.
01:46:08.000 This is real.
01:46:09.000 They can change their colors and immediately adapt to their environment to the point where they're indistinguishable from the background.
01:46:17.000 This is amazing.
01:46:18.000 Wow.
01:46:19.000 Oh, they're insane.
01:46:20.000 They're insane.
01:46:21.000 Wow.
01:46:22.000 They can instantaneously, like within fractions of a second, change the outside of their body to look exactly like a coral reef, not just in the image, but in the texture.
01:46:35.000 They can change themselves to look more like predators or like dangerous things.
01:46:42.000 It's incredible what they can do.
01:46:44.000 We live in the coolest world.
01:46:45.000 My God.
01:46:47.000 Oh, the world's amazing.
01:46:48.000 The world of the ocean still...
01:46:50.000 There's some new project that they're doing right now where they're trying to map the ocean floor.
01:46:56.000 And without a doubt, they're going to discover some freaky fucking fish life, marine life down there that we've never...
01:47:04.000 I've encountered before, but just these creatures, we're just starting to learn what these things are doing.
01:47:11.000 Like, look at that!
01:47:12.000 It's like a flower or something blossoming on fast motion.
01:47:16.000 That's an octopus.
01:47:17.000 But it looks like a tiny...
01:47:20.000 A Wookiee or something.
01:47:21.000 Yeah, it looks like a video game character running.
01:47:23.000 But watch this.
01:47:24.000 It can merge with these coral reefs and it looks like a coral reef.
01:47:30.000 So it's literally developed this ability to turn its body into the shape of a reef and then its little tiny, I mean, it curls its tentacles up into little tiny legs and runs on two legs.
01:47:42.000 It's fucking incredible.
01:47:43.000 They're amazing.
01:47:45.000 Wow, and look, it's like a teardrop shape.
01:47:48.000 That's so cool.
01:47:49.000 Yeah, it's amazing.
01:47:50.000 I would always draw octopuses just because they're fun to draw with all the tentacles and stuff, but my god.
01:47:55.000 Yeah, I had no idea.
01:47:57.000 I had no idea.
01:47:58.000 And the fact that they can do it like that, they just change.
01:48:02.000 You're like, fucking, what a weird world.
01:48:04.000 And they communicate with each other somehow through that, and we don't know how.
01:48:07.000 We know they're really fucking smart, though.
01:48:10.000 Are they going to take it all over after we destroy everything?
01:48:12.000 The octopi are going to rule the earth?
01:48:14.000 Well, that's something I've been really dwelling on lately when it comes to marine life and dolphins and orcas, and I'm a huge believer that they are just as intelligent as us, if not more, and that what we're doing with SeaWorld and all these wild dolphin shows is nothing less than slavery.
01:48:33.000 It's slavery of some alien intelligence that we can't communicate with.
01:48:37.000 We don't understand what they're saying.
01:48:38.000 So we're like, um, can't hear you.
01:48:40.000 I don't know what you're saying.
01:48:41.000 So fucking jump for fish or starve.
01:48:44.000 It's your choice.
01:48:45.000 And I've thought about it, like our ideas about what is intelligent.
01:48:50.000 Like we don't think that something's intelligent unless it does exactly what we do.
01:48:55.000 When we think of intelligence, we say, okay, well, Molly sent me an email.
01:48:59.000 I sent her an email back.
01:49:00.000 I know she's intelligent.
01:49:01.000 She's communicating through an email.
01:49:03.000 The dolphin doesn't know how to fucking make an email.
01:49:05.000 He's an idiot.
01:49:06.000 But they don't need email.
01:49:08.000 Why do we need email?
01:49:09.000 We need email because we need to communicate.
01:49:10.000 Well, they can communicate for miles through the water with their chirps and their noises.
01:49:14.000 They recognize each other from years and years being apart from each other, even though to us they all look the fucking same.
01:49:22.000 They can move and manipulate through 3D space in the water.
01:49:26.000 They don't need a house because they're smart enough to go where the water's warm.
01:49:30.000 Fish is everywhere and it's free, so they don't need jobs.
01:49:32.000 So all these ideas that we have, like what represents intelligence, all that stuff's stupid.
01:49:38.000 Because to them, if you're like, well, I'm going to build a house and drive my car to work, they're like, what are you talking about, bitch?
01:49:44.000 You're under the water.
01:49:46.000 They'd be like, I'm going to hoard all the fish in my thing and kill them and then I'll sell you the fucking fish for kelp.
01:49:51.000 That's a great idea.
01:49:52.000 Yeah, they'd be like, what?
01:49:53.000 Like, you're a high dolphin.
01:49:54.000 I'm going to write you a letter from my laptop.
01:49:56.000 There's no internet down here, stupid.
01:49:58.000 There's no, like, you're a crap dolphin.
01:50:00.000 Yeah, your fucking laptop's not going to work underwater, asshole.
01:50:05.000 So all of our ideas about what's intelligent is only based on our ability to manipulate our environment or create things.
01:50:12.000 That didn't exist.
01:50:14.000 So our intelligence is a very bizarre intelligence because we're the only intelligence that can not just manipulate our environment that's local, but our environment globally.
01:50:25.000 We can essentially change the weather.
01:50:28.000 We can cloud seed and make it rain.
01:50:32.000 That's one of the weird things they do in Abu Dhabi.
01:50:34.000 They make it rain every week.
01:50:36.000 They do it on purpose.
01:50:38.000 They spray the sky with some sort of silver or something or another that makes it, I forget what the exact compound is, but it actually causes it to rain.
01:50:48.000 And they've been doing it like once a week for years.
01:50:51.000 They have rainstorms that they manufacture.
01:50:55.000 We're freaks.
01:50:56.000 We're freaks and our intelligence is fundamentally built on dissatisfaction, which, I mean, we have to have because we're also like weak and not apex predators necessarily.
01:51:04.000 And we're getting weaker, I think, too.
01:51:06.000 I think that's part of it.
01:51:08.000 You know, if you went back to the early humans and you compared like our tendons and bone structure and Are they really humans?
01:51:15.000 Are they stronger than us?
01:51:16.000 I always thought they were, like, shorter and stuff.
01:51:18.000 Neanderthals were.
01:51:19.000 But they're not really humans, right?
01:51:21.000 They're, like, a type of human in how they categorize them?
01:51:24.000 Yeah.
01:51:25.000 They were way stronger than us, though.
01:51:26.000 They weren't just stronger than us.
01:51:27.000 They were, like, really short.
01:51:29.000 They were, like, five foot, five foot two, but, like, 220 pounds, just fucking gorilla-like.
01:51:36.000 Damn.
01:51:36.000 With super thick bones and thick heads and...
01:51:41.000 And they don't really know exactly how intelligent they were either.
01:51:44.000 There's all this speculation as to whether or not they figured out tools on their own or whether they copied them from Homo sapiens and where Homo sapiens came from and did they interbreed and there's debate on that as well.
01:51:57.000 And then they're always finding these fucking new, they found another one like within the last couple of weeks, they found another new species of human that they didn't know existed.
01:52:06.000 They found some large tooth that turned out to be not categorized.
01:52:12.000 It was a human tooth but not categorized in any previous version of human beings that they were aware of before.
01:52:19.000 They found quite a few of them now, including, I'm sure you've heard of like the Hobbit people they found on the island of Flores.
01:52:25.000 That was 14,000 years ago.
01:52:27.000 That's not that long ago.
01:52:28.000 I mean, that's not before the beginning of recorded history, is it?
01:52:32.000 Or is it a little bit before?
01:52:34.000 It depends on whose version of the beginning of recorded history is.
01:52:38.000 There's a bunch of people that believe...
01:52:41.000 There's this guy that I've had on my podcast a few times now.
01:52:44.000 His name is Randall Carlson, and he's an expert in cataclysmic events.
01:52:49.000 And especially astroial impacts.
01:52:52.000 And him and this guy Graham Hancock have worked together.
01:52:57.000 And Graham Hancock wrote this book called Fingerprints of the Gods.
01:52:59.000 It was a really controversial book in the 90s.
01:53:01.000 And then now he has a new one called Magicians of the Gods, which sort of shows how much of his early work that was widely criticized was actually substantiated now by science.
01:53:12.000 Nice.
01:53:13.000 Where these ancient structures that didn't make any sense that they were trying to figure out, like, who fucking built these?
01:53:18.000 Like, how are they here?
01:53:19.000 And archaeologists sort of tried to put, like, vague dates on them.
01:53:22.000 And the idea behind it was that civilization has not evolved and has not progressed on a...
01:53:29.000 Straight plane, but rather there's been these peaks and valleys and that what has happened is people have gotten this very high level of sophistication and culture and then Massive cataclysmic disasters have white people out almost to the brink of extinct extinction and then they've risen back up again So like science is like found quite a few of them,
01:53:48.000 but one of the big ones they keep pointing out is Is that there's somewhere around 12,000 years ago, there was a series of impacts on the Earth.
01:53:59.000 And this has been proven by science now because over the last few years they've discovered this stuff called, I think it's called tritonite, but it's essentially called nuclear glass.
01:54:07.000 And it exists around where they do nuclear tests and it also exists at meteor impact sites.
01:54:14.000 And the impact creates heat that's so intense, it turns sand and rock to glass.
01:54:20.000 And they find this stuff all throughout Europe and it's all around the same time period, which also coincides with the end of the Ice Age.
01:54:28.000 And it also coincides with a thousand plus years later, the beginning of modern civilization, agriculture, mathematics.
01:54:37.000 And so their theory is that that wasn't exactly the beginning, but that was a rebirth.
01:54:43.000 And there was most likely thousands of years of civilization that existed before that, but it was almost entirely wiped out when people were just bombarded with rocks from the sky.
01:54:53.000 I mean, it makes a lot of sense, especially when societies were less interconnected, like the whole reason, you know, stuff, various like, you know, math or astrology survived the Dark Ages in Europe was because in the Middle East, people were able to keep it alive.
01:55:07.000 We live in a time now where unless they literally wiped out everyone, it'd be very hard to do that.
01:55:12.000 But in a world where people don't have that level of communication, where they don't have that level of connection, where they Yeah.
01:55:30.000 I mean, it would be pretty easy, especially today in our culture, because everything has become digital.
01:55:35.000 It's one of the weirdest things about us Advancing and evolving is that as things move to the cloud and as things become much less physical books like your book here, but much more like laptops and Kindle.
01:55:49.000 I have a Kindle and it has 150 books on it or something like that.
01:55:53.000 It's that thin.
01:55:54.000 It sits right in my backpack.
01:55:56.000 I mean, what?
01:55:57.000 That's crazy.
01:55:58.000 It's crazy.
01:55:59.000 It's like this magician's thing, but also you could...
01:56:02.000 Potentially drop a server that had the only copy of something and have that only copy...
01:56:07.000 Disappear.
01:56:08.000 Yeah, be gone.
01:56:09.000 Vanish.
01:56:09.000 And if the power goes out, you're not getting any of this stuff.
01:56:13.000 I had a friend who was going back into an area where he couldn't bring books because there were checkpoints.
01:56:19.000 And he had his iTunes account was something that the country that it was tied to you couldn't buy good e-books on.
01:56:28.000 So I remember I got him all these pirated copies of 1984 and James Baldwin and Catch-22 and stuff to read.
01:56:36.000 And he only has a few hours of power a day and he's reading 1984 on his phone.
01:56:44.000 Craziest illustration of both the ubiquity of a book and also the limits of it in the cloud age?
01:56:51.000 Yeah, there's a lot of limits of it.
01:56:54.000 Our entire society is dependent upon the grid.
01:56:58.000 If the grid goes down, almost none of this stuff is effective.
01:57:02.000 But by the same token, he could smuggle all these books past checkpoints, and no one knew he had them.
01:57:07.000 Right.
01:57:07.000 Yeah.
01:57:08.000 No, I mean, there's definitely, if you're in a war-torn area like that, it's great.
01:57:13.000 It's just, to me, it freaks me out when I think of if something like that happened.
01:57:17.000 Like, there was a big event, I think it was in Indonesia, like 70,000 years ago.
01:57:23.000 They think that civilization was wiped out to the point of there being only a couple thousand people left on the planet.
01:57:28.000 Yeah.
01:57:28.000 A supervolcano erupted.
01:57:31.000 If anything remotely like that happened, we would instantaneously be brought right back to where people were 50,000 years ago.
01:57:38.000 Well, most of us don't have any sort of skills to maintain or rebuild anything.
01:57:42.000 I mean, I don't.
01:57:43.000 I know if there's like the zombie apocalypse, I'd be like, fucking food or something.
01:57:47.000 Yeah.
01:57:48.000 And if we broke into Home Depot, like there's a Home Depot that's like a few miles from here, how many fucking people could get a hammer from there?
01:57:55.000 There's a lot of people out here.
01:57:57.000 There's not enough hammers.
01:57:59.000 We'd hope the shelters that we have hold up, but then where are we going to get food?
01:58:05.000 Unless we get into the ocean and go fishing, are you going to shoot deer?
01:58:10.000 How many deer are there?
01:58:10.000 Like five in this whole neighborhood?
01:58:12.000 Well, the level of population density we have could never be supported by traditional agriculture, ever.
01:58:18.000 Not anymore.
01:58:19.000 No.
01:58:20.000 It's weird.
01:58:21.000 You know what else is weird?
01:58:22.000 A friend of mine pointed this out.
01:58:23.000 He goes, why is it that when you walk down the street, you see all these plants, but none of them grow food?
01:58:29.000 Like, everyone grows plants everywhere, but there are all these fucking useless plants.
01:58:34.000 Like, wouldn't it be amazing if, like, cities were filled with plants that grow fruit and all the grasses and stuff you saw were edible and there was lettuce everywhere.
01:58:44.000 Like, literally everything had food on it.
01:58:46.000 Like, it would be just the same amount of water used...
01:58:48.000 But you would actually get something out of it.
01:58:50.000 But we're so rich that we're like, nope, pine trees.
01:58:53.000 No, I want an oak.
01:58:55.000 I want a beautiful oak here.
01:58:56.000 We don't support the trees and the plants around us that we can actually eat.
01:59:04.000 I remember one time I was in Spain and I was like 17 and I was broke.
01:59:09.000 And I was with my friend and we saw like, wow, these orange trees, steal a lot of oranges.
01:59:15.000 And we like climb up the tree and we like steal all the oranges.
01:59:17.000 And then we like peel them and then they're like bitter and dry.
01:59:20.000 And we're like, these are fucking decorative oranges.
01:59:22.000 They tricked us.
01:59:23.000 They tricked us.
01:59:24.000 These oranges are lies.
01:59:28.000 I think that they specifically probably planted those type of oranges to avoid bad people like us climbing their trees and stealing all of them.
01:59:34.000 Isn't that funny?
01:59:35.000 You're a bad person because you're doing what people have done for the last 100,000 plus years.
01:59:40.000 Exactly, yeah.
01:59:40.000 Bad person for picking fruit from a tree.
01:59:43.000 How strange.
01:59:45.000 And it's also probably those were what oranges really tasted like before we started fucking with them.
01:59:50.000 I refuse to believe that.
01:59:51.000 That's a cruel world.
01:59:53.000 Well, they know that the fact for like corn and a lot of other food was like really gross before people started manipulating it.
02:00:01.000 Truth, truth.
02:00:02.000 But oranges, I want to believe that like prehistoric oranges were a tasty treat and these were not.
02:00:07.000 I don't know.
02:00:07.000 I ate an apple the other day, and me and my friends were laughing while we were eating these apples.
02:00:12.000 We're like, these fucking things have definitely been fucked with.
02:00:15.000 They were big, big giant, and they were so juicy.
02:00:18.000 We're like, what kind of genetically modified shit are we eating right now?
02:00:22.000 Because these are just not normal apples.
02:00:24.000 Giant, juicy, delicious apples.
02:00:27.000 Probably in the middle of apple off-season, too.
02:00:29.000 Yeah, probably.
02:00:30.000 You ever had a crab apple?
02:00:32.000 Molly crab apple?
02:00:33.000 I have a photo of me under a crab apple tree, but I don't know if I've ever eaten a crab apple.
02:00:41.000 Man, I'm sure this will get remedied someday, but not yet, I don't think.
02:00:47.000 Really?
02:00:47.000 Yeah, I mean, I... Oh no, oh my god, you're right.
02:00:53.000 God, I'm getting deep into the memory bank.
02:00:54.000 When I was seven and I lived in Far Rockaway, I think one of the neighbors had a crab apple tree.
02:01:00.000 Or it had the tree with the little apples.
02:01:01.000 Those are the crab apples.
02:01:02.000 Yeah, those are the crab apples.
02:01:03.000 And I believe I stole some of them and I believe they're very sour, as I remember them.
02:01:07.000 Yeah, they're very sour.
02:01:09.000 I ate one of those when I was a little kid.
02:01:10.000 Well, more than once, I'm sure.
02:01:12.000 When I was a little kid growing up in Massachusetts, I remember biting into those things.
02:01:17.000 Yeah, it's so much hope.
02:01:19.000 Yeah.
02:01:19.000 They're good for throwing at people, though.
02:01:21.000 That's what we used them for when we were kids.
02:01:23.000 Nice, nice.
02:01:24.000 Chuck them at each other.
02:01:25.000 Small and hard.
02:01:26.000 Yeah, well, you know, your little tiny hands, you get a good grip on a crab apple and really whip it.
02:01:30.000 Nice, nice.
02:01:32.000 What else you got going on these days besides, I know you're promoting this book, and...
02:01:37.000 Besides that, I'm really excited about this.
02:01:40.000 I'm going to India for a month because there's all these literary festivals in India.
02:01:44.000 Really?
02:01:45.000 Yeah, I'm getting to go to Jaipur and Mumbai.
02:01:47.000 Have you been before?
02:01:48.000 No, it's my first time in my life, so I'm really excited about that.
02:01:52.000 And then besides that, you know, I think I'm reaching that point of burnout where I'm just, I'm like actually planning to take a month off.
02:01:59.000 I know it sounds like fucking blasphemy, but I think I'm going to like lie on a beach in Goa or something and read a lot of books.
02:02:08.000 And other than that, the only thing I really have to talk about is my super dork hobby, which is I've been studying literary Arabic for the last year and I got pretty good at translating stuff, written stuff.
02:02:19.000 Really?
02:02:19.000 Yeah, yeah.
02:02:20.000 I'm really...
02:02:21.000 I'm pretty proud of it.
02:02:22.000 I do this every morning.
02:02:23.000 So I'm translating a long dialogue by the Syrian poet that's called Sex, Poetry and the Revolution.
02:02:32.000 And it is badass.
02:02:33.000 But other than that, I think I'm actually going into that time where I'm just making a little blank space.
02:02:40.000 And then at the end of that, I'll probably be back doing a bunch of journalism for Vice, doing stuff on prisons in the Middle East, working on my next book project.
02:02:49.000 I don't know, seeing where life goes.
02:02:51.000 Because the thing that's so strange about doing a memoir is it really is like sectioning off a chapter, you know, like sectioning off, you know, 15 years of your life.
02:03:01.000 And then you've taken all of that and you've put it into this book form.
02:03:05.000 You've made it into an object and then you go on to what's next.
02:03:08.000 And I guess while I have the vague contours of that in my head, part of me just wants to do nothing for a while and then the plan will come to me.
02:03:17.000 I think that's a great idea.
02:03:18.000 I'm thinking the same thing about my own life right now.
02:03:21.000 I think I'm too involved in too many different things, and I could use a reset, like a calming.
02:03:28.000 I think it's all good stuff, and that's the problem.
02:03:32.000 And I think that's what you're experiencing as well.
02:03:34.000 You have so many cool things you have going on.
02:03:37.000 They're so awesome.
02:03:38.000 I feel so lucky.
02:03:40.000 But if there's no space, I mean...
02:03:43.000 Can't absorb them.
02:03:45.000 Yeah, it's like that Louis C.K. thing about never being bored.
02:03:47.000 I mean, I have that in the best of all possible ways.
02:03:50.000 I have so many cool opportunities.
02:03:52.000 But if you never have any time to be bored or be down, you're just bouncing from thing to thing.
02:04:00.000 What is the Louis C.K. thing about never being bored?
02:04:02.000 I'm not aware of it.
02:04:03.000 It was like a monologue that he had about where he was saying that since we have smartphones, basically...
02:04:08.000 Oh, that's right.
02:04:08.000 Now I remember it.
02:04:09.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
02:04:10.000 So you never have any space to feel anything or to be bored.
02:04:13.000 And so you're just always in the state of distraction.
02:04:16.000 And I think it can be like that with work stuff, too.
02:04:20.000 After that, probably just doing a bunch of journalism stuff.
02:04:23.000 I work a lot with a really cool Syrian-American nonprofit that I'm going to plug here.
02:04:28.000 They're called Karam Foundation.
02:04:31.000 How do you spell that?
02:04:32.000 K-A-R-A-M. And they do something really cool because a lot of attention right now, it's on the Syrian refugees that make it to Europe, but They actually work with people who are displaced inside Syria and then also people like on the border.
02:04:46.000 And for the last two years, I've taken part in a program with them where we go down to these schools that are on the border and they bring like, they bring dentists that fix all the kids' teeth.
02:04:57.000 They bring eye doctors to get all the kids' glasses that need it.
02:05:00.000 But then they also bring like writers and philosophers and architects and like You know, people who teach classes with the kids.
02:05:07.000 And I always do murals there.
02:05:09.000 I've done murals in two schools now.
02:05:11.000 So next spring, I'll probably be back with them painting lots of rebellious cats all over a school in Southeast Turkey.
02:05:18.000 Wow, you live such a broad and fascinating life.
02:05:23.000 I mean, you've had so many really intense experiences.
02:05:29.000 All over the place.
02:05:31.000 Both all over the place professionally and creatively and then geographically.
02:05:36.000 There's so much going on.
02:05:39.000 You're not living a boring life.
02:05:41.000 No, I feel so lucky.
02:05:42.000 I mean, that's why it's so hard for me to be...
02:05:43.000 I need to take a reset because it's like the whole world is so big and cool and I love so many things and it's...
02:05:49.000 Yeah, but I think your instincts are correct though.
02:05:53.000 It seems to me like you've got so much going on all the time, constantly, in so many different arenas.
02:06:01.000 Yeah, it's a lot, but I don't know.
02:06:04.000 It must be the same with you, too.
02:06:05.000 I mean, you do comedy, you do this super thoughtful talk thing, you host MMA stuff.
02:06:11.000 I mean, you've done so many fucking things.
02:06:13.000 I mean, it's just because I feel, and perhaps you feel this way, the world is just so big and weird and interesting, and I just want to learn stuff.
02:06:20.000 Yeah, I wish I could live 10 different lives simultaneously.
02:06:23.000 I'd have a bunch of different careers that I'd be interested in.
02:06:26.000 Same, same, exactly.
02:06:28.000 But to do any of those things correctly requires so much attention and focus.
02:06:33.000 It's almost like you can't enjoy too many things because then the one thing that you enjoy the most or that you choose to enjoy the most, you really can't focus on it correctly.
02:06:44.000 Or else you just never, ever, ever have downtime, ever.
02:06:47.000 Yeah.
02:06:48.000 I'm close to that.
02:06:49.000 I get close to that sometimes.
02:06:51.000 But it's not good.
02:06:51.000 But it's weird because, like, my non-downtime seems very recreational.
02:06:56.000 Yeah, yeah.
02:06:57.000 It's like, it's super fun.
02:06:58.000 Like, I don't want to, like, complain, like, wow, I get to travel all over the world and meet fascinating people and confront bastards.
02:07:05.000 Boo-hoo for me.
02:07:06.000 And yet, you know, at a certain point, You know, this is a big compliment, and I don't mean this in terms of imitation, but your drawing of Trump and Ivanka was very Ralph Steadman-esque.
02:07:23.000 Oh, I idolize that guy.
02:07:24.000 I love him.
02:07:25.000 That's a massive compliment.
02:07:26.000 I think that man is like a god amongst men.
02:07:29.000 He's a bad motherfucker, for sure.
02:07:31.000 But that image is just so much like, I think of it as like the Kentucky Derby is decadent and depraved.
02:07:37.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah, with all the horror.
02:07:38.000 Horrible, like, the monster, like, toad people.
02:07:41.000 Oh, it's so good.
02:07:41.000 Yeah, I've got that framed on my wall in my office, a print from Stedman's illustration of the Kentucky Derby.
02:07:48.000 That's so cool.
02:07:48.000 Have you ever, like, had him on the show, or do you want to go to Kent?
02:07:51.000 No, I would love to.
02:07:52.000 I mean, I don't know if he's ever in Los Angeles, but I prefer to do these things in person.
02:07:56.000 But if he's ever here, I would love to have him on, just to talk to him about Hunter, and what it was like, and what it was like for a time Hunter dosed him with acid.
02:08:04.000 Yeah.
02:08:05.000 Or when they went to Rumble in the Jungle and Hunter sold their tickets and he was drawing it off the TV screen.
02:08:13.000 Yeah, and he was swimming in the pool and he totally fucked the whole story up.
02:08:16.000 Because he thought that Foreman was going to kill Muhammad Ali and he didn't want to see it.
02:08:21.000 So he put a Richard Nixon mask on and swam around the pool.
02:08:24.000 Yeah.
02:08:25.000 Well, he, to this day, or, well, not to this day, obviously he's dead, but considered that one of his biggest journalistic failures.
02:08:31.000 And he went into a giant slump after he did that because, like, he realized that his decadence and his indulgence had actually gotten in the way of an amazing moment in history.
02:08:42.000 God.
02:08:43.000 Just to realize the fucking beautiful beast that you rode to being who you were was turning around and becoming a sort of cliche that was fucking up everything you liked.
02:08:53.000 Did you ever see the Alex Gibney movie, Gonzo, The Life and Times of Dr. Hunter?
02:08:59.000 I didn't.
02:08:59.000 It's fucking incredible.
02:09:00.000 It's so good.
02:09:02.000 It's such a good documentary.
02:09:04.000 But that was almost like initially, that's how they started the movie off.
02:09:09.000 He started the movie off explaining that at the end of his life, Hunter had really stopped being creative.
02:09:16.000 The writing wasn't there anymore.
02:09:17.000 The things that he wrote were really middling.
02:09:20.000 They weren't that good.
02:09:21.000 And it was because his indulgences and his excesses had really cooked his brain.
02:09:26.000 And he had become almost a caricature of himself.
02:09:32.000 Along the line some of the interviews They had found him when he was a younger man and when he had started to become famous and he was actually worried about that very thing He was saying like I can't even get out of my own way anymore And they don't even necessarily when I'm when I'm doing these things I can't tell whether or not they want me and they want my take on things or whether they want reality itself like and I'm Because it's almost it would almost be better if I died Like for my own
02:10:02.000 work.
02:10:03.000 And that was like, wow, like this guy is experiencing like a really early version of, well, it's also very rare that a journalist becomes that famous.
02:10:13.000 So, so rare, so rare.
02:10:15.000 But I mean, I think the problem was that he, at a certain point, he stopped growing and changing and pushing himself and it was just more comfortable to like stay in the mask.
02:10:24.000 Yeah, no doubt.
02:10:26.000 Yeah.
02:10:26.000 I think, and also, the indulgences and the substances became not just a habit, but probably a physical addiction.
02:10:35.000 And at that point in time, he's more of a slave to that than he is even the work itself.
02:10:41.000 And the work itself is almost like something that he's eventually going to get to.
02:10:44.000 I'll get to that eventually.
02:10:45.000 I'll get to that.
02:10:46.000 But it's just cocaine.
02:10:47.000 We read off a list when Lance Armstrong was here yesterday of a typical day in the life of Hunter S. Thompson as far as...
02:10:53.000 Oh God, yeah, it just starts with like massive...
02:10:56.000 Does it start with like ether or coke?
02:10:58.000 What does it start with?
02:10:59.000 It starts with...
02:11:00.000 It's like Chivas Regal, cocaine, Dunhill cigarettes, cocaine, Chivas Regal...
02:11:06.000 We read it all off.
02:11:07.000 It's fucking preposterous.
02:11:08.000 Like you should be fucking dead.
02:11:10.000 And then it says at midnight, Hunter S. Thompson is ready to write.
02:11:14.000 And this is like after getting up at three...
02:11:16.000 Oh God, you spend your entire time like pouring like liquids into your head and then smoking things.
02:11:22.000 But for a while it worked.
02:11:23.000 He wrote some insane shit during that time.
02:11:26.000 He wrote some amazing stuff.
02:11:28.000 It's almost like he just redlined his brain, never changed the oil, and kept the metal pinned.
02:11:34.000 And then this magnificent thing happened until it horrifically ground down.
02:11:39.000 I gotta be boring and I gotta go.
02:11:40.000 I'm really sorry.
02:11:41.000 Get out of here!
02:11:42.000 I'm lame, I'm lame.
02:11:43.000 No, please, no worries.
02:11:44.000 Thank you so much for coming on.
02:11:46.000 And everybody, Drawing Blood is the book.
02:11:48.000 I'm in the middle of it right now and it is excellent.
02:11:51.000 And your writing is really fantastic and honest and just really, really good stuff.
02:11:57.000 Thank you so much.
02:11:58.000 Thank you.
02:11:58.000 Thank you.
02:11:59.000 And you can follow Molly on Twitter, Molly Crabapple on Twitter.
02:12:03.000 Same thing on Instagram, website.
02:12:06.000 MollyCrabapple.com Go buy the book, fuckers.
02:12:09.000 Thank you so much, Joe.
02:12:09.000 This is awesome.
02:12:10.000 Thank you, Molly.
02:12:11.000 Bye, everybody.
02:12:12.000 That was so cool.
02:12:13.000 Thank you.
02:12:13.000 That was great.