The Joe Rogan Experience - Joe Rogan Experience - #821 & Fight Companion - Joey Diaz

00:00:05.000 I get so pumped up for these.

00:00:08.000 Fight Companion.

00:00:09.000 If you've never heard one of these before, ladies and gentlemen, I'll probably explain this in the introduction for the people that have to listen to the audio version of it only. 0.98

00:00:17.000 We just watch fights and we talk shit. 0.61

00:00:19.000 We may or may not discuss the actual fight itself. 0.99

00:00:23.000 Most of the time, we don't.

00:00:24.000 But today, it's with... 0.99

00:00:26.000 The great Joey motherfucking Diaz. 0.99

00:00:29.000 Thank you for having me. 0.98

00:00:30.000 Thanks for being here, brother.

00:00:31.000 I'm excited.

00:00:31.000 I'm excited about our show at the Ka Theater tomorrow night.

00:00:36.000 Yes!

00:00:36.000 Out of all the fights on the card, Dos Anos Alvarez was the fight.

00:00:42.000 Really?

00:00:42.000 That was my fight.

00:00:43.000 For the whole weekend?

00:00:44.000 The whole weekend.

00:00:45.000 I didn't know when it was.

00:00:46.000 I thought it was on the undercard.

00:00:47.000 I didn't know when it was.

00:00:49.000 This is the fight I've been waiting for. 0.99

00:00:51.000 This to me is a fucking barn burner. 0.97

00:00:54.000 I'm looking forward to it for sure because Alvarez is very tough and he makes every fight tough. 0.98

00:00:58.000 He's a tough dude and I think he's going to have a real good game plan coming in.

00:01:01.000 I think he's going to be as prepared as you're ever going to see him because you've seen him off some hard fights in the UFC. He had that war with Cowboy Cerrone, got lit up, especially his leg.

00:01:15.000 He just got introduced to the next level.

00:01:18.000 Of MMA, but coming off of a victory like that over Pettis and he beat Gilbert too and He had a fight through adversity in the Gilbert Melendez fight. 0.99

00:01:27.000 He had a seriously fucked up eye. 0.52

00:01:28.000 Remember his eye squashed? 0.99

00:01:29.000 Yes, yes, yes, that's right.

00:01:30.000 He's a tough He's a tough dude. 0.91

00:01:32.000 You gotta, you know, you gotta put him away man, and that's tough to fucking do He's as game as they get, but this dude is special. 0.72

00:01:39.000 This Dos Anjos is special He's um, he's hit a very high level over the last couple years and he's his skill level is Is higher than it's ever been. 0.82

00:01:49.000 It's like a bunch of different things coming together.

00:01:51.000 One, it's Rafael Cordero.

00:01:54.000 Rafael Cordero is such a good coach.

00:01:56.000 The coach of King's MMA, the original guys from Shoot the Box in Curitiba, Brazil.

00:02:02.000 Those guys were so badass.

00:02:04.000 I mean, he's from such a badass lineage.

00:02:07.000 He's from the early days of Ninja and Anderson Silva.

00:02:12.000 And he's the guy who took Fabricio Verdum...

00:02:14.000 From a guy who really wasn't a striker at all.

00:02:16.000 Just a jujitsu artist.

00:02:18.000 And he brought him to the heavyweight title.

00:02:21.000 And now you look at Fabricio striking.

00:02:22.000 He made a big mistake, obviously, in the Stipe Miocic fight. 0.99

00:02:25.000 But I think Stipe Miocic's a bad motherfucker. 0.99

00:02:28.000 If he catches you, he catches you. 0.99

00:02:29.000 You know, he tried to go to war with Stipe, and Stipe just was better at moving away and countering him.

00:02:34.000 And he got careless and left some openings.

00:02:36.000 And it could have been because he was in Brazil.

00:02:38.000 He was ill.

00:02:38.000 He was real emotional.

00:02:39.000 Who knows? 1.00

00:02:40.000 He fucked up. 1.00

00:02:41.000 And Stipe's a bad motherfucker. 1.00

00:02:42.000 So those two are a bad combination together. 0.99

00:02:44.000 But that said, you look at Verdum striking against Travis Brown.

00:02:48.000 It's excellent.

00:02:49.000 His striking against Cain Velasquez.

00:02:51.000 It's excellent.

00:02:52.000 Excellent.

00:02:53.000 Long.

00:02:53.000 Snaps that jab out.

00:02:55.000 Keeps you to distance.

00:02:56.000 Throws hard kicks.

00:02:57.000 Because he wants you to take him down.

00:02:58.000 How about that?

00:02:59.000 He wants you.

00:03:00.000 Put him on his back.

00:03:01.000 Good luck with that.

00:03:03.000 Good luck with the nastiest guard the heavyweight division has ever seen, arguably.

00:03:07.000 He's a mother...

00:03:08.000 I mean, Frank Mir snapped arms.

00:03:09.000 I mean, you gotta go with...

00:03:10.000 Like, if you want to look at, like, effective submissions in the heavyweight division in MMA, it's tough to not give the nod to Frank Mir.

00:03:18.000 Tapped Lesnar with a knee bar, snapped Minotaro's arm, snapped Tim Sylvia's arm.

00:03:24.000 Just...

00:03:24.000 Maybe not for his overall career, because he's definitely had ups and downs, but been in some amazing fights.

00:03:31.000 But his submission victories are fucking horrendous. 0.99

00:03:34.000 He breaks bones, man. 1.00

00:03:36.000 Who the fuck else breaks bones? 0.99

00:03:37.000 Frank Mayer's breaking bones with arm bars. 0.99

00:03:40.000 Breaking bones with Kimura. 0.99

00:03:41.000 He broke fucking Minotauro's arm. 1.00

00:03:44.000 Snapped it in half where he was looking over at it like, holy shit. 0.99

00:03:48.000 So it's hard not to give the nod to Frank Mir when it comes to overall MMA guard skill. 0.87

00:03:55.000 But that said, man, the technical ability that Verdum has is off the charts.

00:04:02.000 The way he wraps you up is so neat.

00:04:04.000 He just tucks everything tight.

00:04:06.000 Like that Fedor armbar, oh my god.

00:04:09.000 I mean, he just slapped that on him. 0.99

00:04:11.000 Where Fedor was stuck in that guard and you could see in his eyes, he was like, oh shit. 0.99

00:04:17.000 This is like, the water's heavier. 0.99

00:04:19.000 I can't drink it.

00:04:21.000 I can't get up to get where the air is. 1.00

00:04:24.000 Holy shit, just get crushed into those legs. 1.00

00:04:27.000 He's fucking huge, too. 1.00

00:04:28.000 He's a giant guy. 0.99

00:04:30.000 I mean, I got legit 240. Doesn't really have to lift much to be like 240. He's a huge guy.

00:04:37.000 For Doom's, no joke, man. 1.00

00:04:39.000 So for Stipe Miocic to take him out like that, fuck, that was a victory. 0.99

00:04:43.000 And to do it in Brazil? 1.00

00:04:45.000 That must have been nuts, man.

00:04:47.000 That was like 40,000 people or something crazy, right?

00:04:50.000 It was a soccer stadium.

00:04:52.000 Jesus. 0.99

00:04:52.000 He didn't give a fuck. 0.99

00:04:54.000 There was zero fucks given in Mayo Chase's world. 1.00

00:04:56.000 In Mayo Chase's world, there was zero fucks. 0.99

00:04:58.000 He had no idea he was in Brazil. 0.91

00:05:01.000 Well, that dude is as legit as they get.

00:05:04.000 His mindset is so strong.

00:05:06.000 He's so calm.

00:05:08.000 He's so calm right before he throws down, man.

00:05:10.000 And you know what? 0.99

00:05:11.000 More now than ever, because he's been there and done that, that war that he had with Junior Dos Santos, I mean, that was a fucking war. 1.00

00:05:18.000 Experience is a motherfucker in this UFC and MMA. Experience is it, man. 0.99

00:05:24.000 Yeah, it is it, but he's also got a lot of skill, and he's getting better.

00:05:29.000 That's the other thing about Stipe.

00:05:30.000 Stipe's getting better. 0.99

00:05:32.000 I mean, he's always been a motherfucker, but he's better now than he's ever been. 0.99

00:05:35.000 Better mentally, stronger, more steady. 0.99

00:05:38.000 Like, everything about him is better.

00:05:40.000 Now he has, what's his name in Cleveland?

00:05:42.000 When?

00:05:43.000 Alistair Overeem in October.

00:05:45.000 Oh! 0.60

00:05:45.000 September? 0.60

00:05:46.000 September.

00:05:46.000 Something like that.

00:05:47.000 September, I think.

00:05:48.000 September in Cleveland.

00:05:49.000 Oh! 0.60

00:05:50.000 You wanna go?

00:05:50.000 That's a barn burner right there.

00:05:51.000 Wanna come?

00:05:51.000 I don't know what the date is.

00:05:52.000 Let's do a show on Friday night.

00:05:54.000 My October's jacked.

00:05:56.000 September's a jack. 0.99

00:05:57.000 You're too goddamn popular. 0.99

00:05:58.000 No, no, no, no. 0.99

00:05:59.000 I do the every other week thing.

00:06:01.000 But the nose, the special, everything is just falling into, you know, it's just October 15th I shoot, so everything is wrapped around that pretty much.

00:06:10.000 Beautiful.

00:06:12.000 But Cleveland's, that's going to be fun.

00:06:14.000 And the people that are going to be there to support Stipe, because right now, I mean, they've got basketball, and now they've got the UFC heavyweight champion.

00:06:23.000 Doug, put the show together.

00:06:24.000 I'm open.

00:06:25.000 You're open?

00:06:26.000 I think I'm open.

00:06:26.000 I think I'm open there.

00:06:28.000 Saturday, September 10th?

00:06:29.000 I think I'm open.

00:06:30.000 So the Friday the 9th would be where we do the show.

00:06:33.000 Beautiful.

00:06:34.000 Let's do it.

00:06:34.000 I think I'm open there.

00:06:36.000 That's a crazy fight, too.

00:06:37.000 That's an interesting fight.

00:06:38.000 Because Alistair has been fighting very smart lately.

00:06:42.000 Man, he's just put it together really nicely in his last few fights.

00:06:46.000 Is he still at Jackson's?

00:06:48.000 Yes, he's still at Jackson's?

00:06:50.000 I think.

00:06:51.000 Part-time?

00:06:52.000 Pretty sure.

00:06:53.000 I'm pretty sure he's still at Jackson's.

00:06:55.000 The thing about him, again, he was, you know, in pride and all that stuff.

00:06:58.000 He was the heavyweight champion in kickboxing.

00:07:02.000 You know, there comes a time in your life when you put the pieces together.

00:07:05.000 We're starting to see it now.

00:07:06.000 From Alistair to Nate Diaz to all these fighters that years ago, ah, they lost one.

00:07:14.000 You know, who did he lose to?

00:07:15.000 He lost to Clay Guida.

00:07:17.000 Rafael Dos Santos.

00:07:19.000 Broken jaw.

00:07:19.000 Yeah.

00:07:20.000 You know, and look what he's gone on to do. 0.68

00:07:22.000 Crazy.

00:07:22.000 So they put it all together.

00:07:24.000 It's like when a comedian gets a show.

00:07:26.000 You know how hard it is for a comedian to get a show?

00:07:29.000 All the stars have to be aligned.

00:07:32.000 Right.

00:07:32.000 You know, everything has to be in order.

00:07:34.000 Everything.

00:07:35.000 Just to get it on.

00:07:36.000 Right.

00:07:37.000 Everybody gets pilots every year.

00:07:39.000 But just to really get to that high level that you're talking about.

00:07:44.000 It takes years.

00:07:45.000 You know, maybe Cordero, when he went to Cordero's, Cordero put it all together.

00:07:50.000 The jiu-jitsu and the boxing, or the kickboxing, put it all together.

00:07:52.000 It definitely is a big part of it.

00:07:54.000 It's a big part of it.

00:07:55.000 You know what else is a big part of it?

00:07:56.000 His strength and conditioning program.

00:07:58.000 He's one of those guys who trains under Nick Kurson.

00:08:02.000 Do you know Nick Kurson?

00:08:03.000 No, sir.

00:08:04.000 Nick Kurson, he's one of the students of Marv Marinovich.

00:08:07.000 You know the Marv Marinovich and Todd Marinovich story?

00:08:10.000 Yes, the quarterback, yeah, yeah.

00:08:10.000 Yeah, and Marv Marinovich was a world-famous strength and conditioning coach with some seriously unconventional, wild ideas that were very, very effective.

00:08:19.000 And...

00:08:34.000 I'm so high.

00:08:36.000 Definitely shouldn't be doing this podcast right now.

00:08:39.000 Provodnikov.

00:08:41.000 The Siberian Rocky, you know the guy I'm talking about.

00:08:43.000 He trains that guy too.

00:08:44.000 And Joe Schilling, he's done some work with Joe.

00:08:46.000 He's a really good strength and conditioning guy.

00:08:48.000 And Cardero and the combination of high-level MMA, high-level jiu-jitsu, and this radical strength and conditioning program these guys do.

00:08:58.000 All these plyometrics.

00:08:59.000 It's all these box jumps.

00:09:01.000 Everything's exploding and resting.

00:09:02.000 Everything's very carefully monitored.

00:09:05.000 It's really interesting stuff, man.

00:09:06.000 Do a lot of stuff with your feet.

00:09:08.000 That's one thing that he said that kind of blew my mind.

00:09:11.000 I was like, yeah, I didn't even think of that.

00:09:13.000 He goes, I go, what's the most important thing?

00:09:15.000 Like, what do you work on a guy the most when you first start training him?

00:09:18.000 And he's like, their feet.

00:09:21.000 Foot strength is one of the biggest weaknesses that a lot of fighters have.

00:09:26.000 Their feet will get tired and so you can't push off as hard.

00:09:30.000 You can't move as well. 0.99

00:09:32.000 Your footwork starts to suck. 0.98

00:09:34.000 You can't explode in or out. 0.99

00:09:36.000 When you see a guy who's got...

00:09:38.000 Real good footwork and the ability to dive in and out and move very well and fast.

00:09:44.000 You realize what a giant advantage that is.

00:09:47.000 Like, Conor does it so well.

00:09:48.000 Lyoto did it so well.

00:09:50.000 Wonderboy does it so well. 1.00

00:09:51.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

00:09:52.000 Joe Duffy. 1.00

00:09:56.000 Joe Duffy banging on Mitch Clark.

00:09:58.000 Joe Duffy very upset coming into this fight after losing to Dustin Poirier.

00:10:03.000 He's got a rear naked choke on him.

00:10:04.000 Clark taps. 0.53

00:10:05.000 Wow.

00:10:06.000 Beautiful. 1.00

00:10:08.000 Joe Duffy's a bad motherfucker. 1.00

00:10:10.000 He was a bad motherfucker, but he ran into Poirier when Poirier had finally figured out that 155 was the healthy weight class for him. 1.00

00:10:19.000 That he was just killing himself, making that 145 limit. 1.00

00:10:22.000 He's a big boy.

00:10:23.000 You ever stand next to Dustin Poirier?

00:10:24.000 He's a big dude.

00:10:25.000 He's a big dude.

00:10:26.000 He's a big dude to get down to 145 pounds.

00:10:29.000 These guys that do that, man, they are, oof.

00:10:32.000 When did he fight last? 0.95

00:10:33.000 He looked really fucking good. 0.98

00:10:35.000 He fought Bobby Green, knocked him out. 0.98

00:10:37.000 Really good.

00:10:38.000 TKO'd him, I should say.

00:10:39.000 And his stand-up looked excellent.

00:10:41.000 Excellent.

00:10:42.000 He's so sharp and real fluid with his combinations.

00:10:46.000 And all the guys that McGregor beat up.

00:10:49.000 Those first two or three guys really have turned...

00:10:52.000 Holloway, Max Holloway's a killer right now. 0.95

00:10:54.000 Oh, Max Holloway is the killer. 0.97

00:10:55.000 Max Holloway's on fire right now. 0.99

00:10:56.000 He's the killer.

00:10:56.000 Dennis Seaver's somewhere banging on a cage right now.

00:10:59.000 You know, Dennis Seaver's the only one that hasn't showed what happened after McGregor, but...

00:11:03.000 Yeah, well, Dennis Seaver took a bad beating in that fight.

00:11:06.000 I remember watching that fight going, oh, this is, uh...

00:11:09.000 It was a Dennis Seaver, I think, that, first of all, Conor's just better than him. 0.99

00:11:13.000 Conor's faster, he's bigger, hits hard as fuck. 0.99

00:11:17.000 He's 30 years younger. 1.00

00:11:18.000 Yeah, and it's just the miles.

00:11:20.000 Seaver's had some wars inside the cage.

00:11:23.000 You know, you go back and watch some of Seaver's fights, then think about the camps that he had in preparing for those fights. 0.98

00:11:29.000 Then think about the fucking wars that he must have had in the camps. 0.97

00:11:33.000 And you look at all that Miles. 0.98

00:11:34.000 So it's like, you see a guy like Conor beat a guy like Seaver, and it just sort of confirms what you already know, is that Conor's the truth. 0.98

00:11:42.000 He is that goddamn good. 0.98

00:11:43.000 Because it was a beating, you know? 0.99

00:11:45.000 And Seaver's got an interesting style.

00:11:48.000 It's hard to beat him up standing.

00:11:50.000 Because Seaver throws hard shots, and he's got that weird karate style.

00:11:55.000 That one kick is like a...

00:11:57.000 Yeah, but...

00:11:58.000 It just was not enough.

00:11:59.000 When I first met John Anik, he didn't have gray hair.

00:12:01.000 Look at him now.

00:12:02.000 He's like Obama. 0.99

00:12:03.000 You do these live shows, you freak the fuck out. 1.00

00:12:08.000 I'm looking at him going, he had no fucking gray hair. 0.99

00:12:10.000 He was a young kid two years ago. 0.99

00:12:12.000 What happened?

00:12:12.000 Props to John Anik for getting that 209 tattoo.

00:12:17.000 That shit's hilarious. 0.99

00:12:19.000 You know what he did? 1.00

00:12:21.000 He fucking said something, like something silly about Nate Diaz, that if Nate Diaz won the fight with Conor, he would get 209 tattooed on his arm. 0.99

00:12:39.000 First of all, you're probably not supposed to say that, I don't think. 0.99

00:12:45.000 Especially about a guy that you have to commentate on.

00:12:48.000 Second of all, I didn't agree with it at all.

00:12:51.000 I didn't agree with it at all stylistically.

00:12:53.000 I thought when they announced that matchup, I was like, whoa.

00:12:58.000 Nate's a nightmare.

00:12:59.000 The people that don't know he's a nightmare, if you don't know that guy's a nightmare, go watch that fight with Michael Johnson. 0.96

00:13:07.000 He beats up Michael Johnson standing.

00:13:09.000 Go watch what he did to Cowboy Cerrone, particularly in the first round. 1.00

00:13:13.000 Nate Diaz is a motherfucker. 1.00

00:13:16.000 Well, listen, bro. 1.00

00:13:17.000 A tattoo is nothing.

00:13:18.000 Didn't Tripoli have to drink a bucket of piss or something? 0.87

00:13:21.000 A bucket of piss you'd forget about in a couple weeks.

00:13:23.000 He's going to remember that tattoo for the rest of his life. 1.00

00:13:25.000 Shit! 1.00

00:13:25.000 That bucket of piss will linger over my head all week. 1.00

00:13:29.000 But Anik is a really good guy. 0.53

00:13:31.000 He is a good guy.

00:13:32.000 He's a real nice guy.

00:13:33.000 I really like that guy.

00:13:34.000 I think he's a really good commentator, too.

00:13:37.000 He's excellent.

00:13:38.000 That job that he has and that Goldberg has, that job is hard, man.

00:13:43.000 It seems easy because they're good at it.

00:13:46.000 But if you had to do it or if I had to do it, I would fail miserably.

00:13:49.000 I did it once a long time ago.

00:13:51.000 I failed miserably.

00:13:52.000 It's me and Phil Barone did an episode.

00:13:54.000 I was just terrible at that.

00:13:56.000 My job is so much easier.

00:13:58.000 All I have to do is the fights are happening and I have to say what I think is happening in the fight.

00:14:02.000 That's it.

00:14:03.000 The job of the Goldberg guy or the Anik guy... 0.99

00:14:08.000 Or Michael Chiavello or any of those guys.

00:14:10.000 Maura Rennell.

00:14:11.000 That's a very difficult job. 1.00

00:14:13.000 Oh, shit! 1.00

00:14:14.000 Duffy with the right hand! 1.00

00:14:15.000 Mitch is in trouble.

00:14:21.000 Wait a minute.

00:14:23.000 It's just a replay.

00:14:27.000 I was like, wait a minute, he had tapped, didn't he?

00:14:29.000 That's a beautiful angle of it.

00:14:31.000 That's a quick beatdown.

00:14:33.000 Joe Duffy working with Farras Zahabi is a big move too, man.

00:14:36.000 That's a big move.

00:14:38.000 I know he had done some work with him before, but there's like a couple of those guys.

00:14:44.000 Like a Duke Rufus, you know, Farras, Matt Hume.

00:14:48.000 They just know so much.

00:14:49.000 How much Farras' resume?

00:14:51.000 I watched some of his breakdown.

00:14:53.000 It's impressive as hell.

00:14:54.000 Yeah, he was a kickboxer.

00:14:55.000 Very good kickboxer.

00:14:56.000 And nasty jujitsu, man.

00:14:58.000 Really good jujitsu.

00:14:59.000 I've seen him demonstrate some techniques and I've talked to some people that roll with him.

00:15:03.000 Legit world-class.

00:15:05.000 Like, very, very good on the ground.

00:15:06.000 Like, surprisingly good.

00:15:09.000 Yeah, and just very smart.

00:15:11.000 Very smart.

00:15:11.000 Very good at breaking down fights.

00:15:13.000 Very analytical mind, but very objective, not ego-based.

00:15:17.000 And he's strong in everything, Feras is.

00:15:20.000 As a martial artist, I think.

00:15:23.000 I think you could say the same thing about Matt Hume.

00:15:26.000 Both those guys are elite in everything.

00:15:28.000 Matt Hume was an elite MMA fighter.

00:15:30.000 A lot of people don't know.

00:15:31.000 He fought Pat Miletic back in the day.

00:15:33.000 This was before Pat had become the UFC champion, but Pat was a really well-respected MMA fighter.

00:15:39.000 He was a real pioneer, Pat Miletic was.

00:15:42.000 And Matt Hume took him apart.

00:15:43.000 He blasted him.

00:15:45.000 He blasted him with leg kicks, and I believe he caught him with a knee and broke his nose.

00:15:50.000 And it was a real weird stoppage, because it was a real quick fight.

00:15:53.000 And Pat would have fought through it.

00:15:55.000 But they stopped the fight because of a broken nose.

00:15:58.000 So, like, honestly, I mean, although Matt was having his way with him, I mean, it was just a series of exchanges.

00:16:03.000 We've all seen fights turn around, where one guy's winning and he's dominating, and then the other guy turns around and beats him, but...

00:16:10.000 But Matt Hume, my point is, like, did he beat, even though there was a kind of a...

00:16:13.000 I just wanted to put it, like, it was kind of a funky stoppage.

00:16:16.000 Because Pat would have definitely fought through it. 0.52

00:16:17.000 Like, you'd have to kill Pat Miletic to get him to quit. 0.50

00:16:20.000 He's not quitting. 0.99

00:16:21.000 You know, for a broken nose, that didn't mean shit to him, but the doctor just decided for whatever. 1.00

00:16:26.000 A broken fucking nose. 0.99

00:16:27.000 I would go home. 1.00

00:16:28.000 It was like 94 or something like that.

00:16:30.000 A broken nose?

00:16:30.000 Are you kidding me?

00:16:31.000 Yeah.

00:16:31.000 You're bleeding like that, gushing out of your...

00:16:33.000 I'd be fainting.

00:16:34.000 These guys have broken noses all the time and they fight through it now. 1.00

00:16:38.000 Are you fucking crazy? 0.99

00:16:38.000 They fight through it all the time now. 0.99

00:16:40.000 When Alvarez had the eye like that, I'm going home.

00:16:43.000 Listen, it's over.

00:16:44.000 I'm going home.

00:16:45.000 I'll come back next week and fight you. 1.00

00:16:46.000 We gotta go look at this fucking eye. 1.00

00:16:47.000 What the fuck? 1.00

00:16:49.000 Broken nose. 1.00

00:16:50.000 I'm gonna sit there and fight you to the death with a broken nose and shit. 1.00

00:16:53.000 Well, Rory McDonald's having a problem with his nose. 1.00

00:16:56.000 Apparently, he broke it twice in training.

00:16:58.000 They were talking about it on...

00:17:00.000 What is the ESPN shows, or the Fox Sports 1 shows?

00:17:03.000 UFC Tonight?

00:17:04.000 Is that what it is?

00:17:05.000 Yeah, UFC Tonight.

00:17:06.000 They were talking about UFC Tonight, that he had gone through... 0.91

00:17:09.000 How the fuck do I not know that name? 0.93

00:17:11.000 I should probably know that. 0.99

00:17:12.000 That he had to go through two broken noses in his camp.

00:17:16.000 So he broke his nose twice in camp, preparing for that fight. 0.97

00:17:20.000 Because I think it was really fucked up by Robbie Lawler. 0.98

00:17:23.000 That Robbie Lawler fight was insane. 0.99

00:17:27.000 I gotta fix my nose.

00:17:28.000 They're gonna put two straws in my nose and a stitch. 1.00

00:17:31.000 For 30 years I was looking for a straw.

00:17:33.000 Now they're putting two straws directly in my nose.

00:17:35.000 What an invention.

00:17:36.000 They're gonna keep them there forever?

00:17:38.000 For a week.

00:17:39.000 Till the 18th. 0.99

00:17:40.000 So I do the surgery Monday and then for a week I have two straws in my fucking nose. 0.99

00:17:43.000 And then they pull the straws out? 0.99

00:17:44.000 Then they pull the straws out.

00:17:45.000 I had splints in my nose.

00:17:48.000 It's interesting, man, because it kind of changed the shape of my nose a little bit.

00:17:54.000 Like, it made my inside, there was so much they cut out.

00:18:00.000 They have these things called turbinates, you know what those things are?

00:18:03.000 Turbinates, yeah.

00:18:03.000 They get in the way, too.

00:18:04.000 They cut those out.

00:18:06.000 And he said they just pulled out just giant chunks of scar tissue that had calcified. 1.00

00:18:10.000 There was just no breathing out of that stupid nose. 1.00

00:18:13.000 You're gonna love it, Joey. 1.00

00:18:14.000 Once you get it done, oh my god.

00:18:16.000 You're gonna feel so good to be able to breathe out of your nose. 0.98

00:18:20.000 The right side is fucking done. 0.99

00:18:20.000 The right side is done. 0.99

00:18:22.000 I must have killed that side would blow. 1.00

00:18:24.000 Killed it. 0.99

00:18:26.000 All I could see is that doctor on Monday, like a dentist, when they're cleaning a cavity, and she's got the goggles on, and coke rocks are hitting her in the face, and fucking aluminum foils, and cubic hairs, and God knows what else. 0.99

00:18:40.000 I snort a cheek rock. 1.00

00:18:42.000 Whatever the fuck comes off that ceiling and carpets and cat hair, I put all that shit. 1.00

00:18:47.000 Because sometimes you drop a coke rock on the floor. 1.00

00:18:49.000 Listen, at four in the morning, that coke rock's going down. 0.99

00:18:51.000 I don't give a fuck what's on the floor. 0.99

00:18:53.000 Nails, thumbtacks, lint. 1.00

00:18:56.000 It all goes in your nose.

00:18:57.000 You deal with it in the morning.

00:18:58.000 In the morning, it'll come out.

00:19:00.000 Something will be there. 0.98

00:19:01.000 It's fucking real. 0.98

00:19:02.000 You just take it out. 0.99

00:19:03.000 Un-fucking-believable. 0.97

00:19:04.000 If you spilled a little bit on a hardwood floor, would you get down on that floor and sniff it right off the floor? 0.99

00:19:09.000 I would fucking put my finger and whatever else stuck to that finger. 0.98

00:19:12.000 Let's say it was a little coke rock and I had lint around and sheet rock. 0.99

00:19:16.000 Whatever else was on that finger went in my fucking nose with some water and I just held it up there to melt it and whatever happened, happened. 0.98

00:19:24.000 Oh my god. 0.99

00:19:25.000 It's just crazy.

00:19:27.000 It's just crazy.

00:19:28.000 And the doctor's name is Dr. Line.

00:19:33.000 L-I-N-E. No. 0.71

00:19:35.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:19:36.000 I don't know if it's a joke.

00:19:37.000 The doctor that's fixing your nose is Dr. Line?

00:19:40.000 Dr. Line. 1.00

00:19:42.000 That's the fucking nose doctor. 1.00

00:19:44.000 See, that's one of those things where it just makes you feel like we're not living in reality. 1.00

00:19:49.000 This is it.

00:19:49.000 Dr. Line.

00:19:50.000 When he gave me the reference, I fucking died, my family doctor. 0.99

00:19:55.000 I go, are you serious? 0.98

00:19:56.000 His name is Dr. Line.

00:19:58.000 This can't be real, Joey.

00:19:59.000 It's a movie.

00:20:00.000 We're living in a movie. 1.00

00:20:02.000 This John Jones shit, Joey Diaz. 1.00

00:20:08.000 How disappointed. 1.00

00:20:09.000 Real disappointed.

00:20:10.000 I'm like a 10. I was a 10. Out of all fight cancellation disappointments, that was heartbreaking.

00:20:17.000 9 o'clock at fucking night? 0.98

00:20:18.000 9 o'clock at night I found that. 0.99

00:20:21.000 I found it by Jamie.

00:20:22.000 Jamie texted it to me.

00:20:24.000 I was heartbroken.

00:20:25.000 And you said, oh no, or something.

00:20:26.000 I just couldn't believe it.

00:20:27.000 I was like, oh no, I couldn't believe it.

00:20:29.000 It's not drugs.

00:20:31.000 I don't know what it is.

00:20:32.000 It's not, because he's been tested by the probation department.

00:20:36.000 Well, how often do they test him?

00:20:38.000 Every two weeks, maybe once a month. 0.99

00:20:40.000 Well, what if he was doing something that, well, who the fuck knows? 0.98

00:20:43.000 It's just speculation. 0.98

00:20:44.000 Yeah, it's just speculation.

00:20:45.000 But from what I understand, I don't think they pull you off a card if you were doing pot.

00:20:50.000 You know what I'm saying?

00:20:51.000 Like, if he tested positive for marijuana this far out, because it was in June, I do not think they would pull him off the card.

00:21:01.000 He tested positive once before, before a fight for cocaine.

00:21:04.000 Yes.

00:21:05.000 Against Cormier once before.

00:21:06.000 But what I'm saying is, I don't think it's that.

00:21:09.000 No.

00:21:09.000 I think it's a PED. Oh, God.

00:21:11.000 That's what I think it is.

00:21:13.000 And what's a PED exactly?

00:21:14.000 Performance enhancing drug.

00:21:16.000 Which could be...

00:21:17.000 Drop it on me.

00:21:17.000 It could be an accident.

00:21:18.000 And it's been an accident many times.

00:21:20.000 Tim Means is the most recent example.

00:21:23.000 I mean, he told them straight up, this is all I took. 1.00

00:21:25.000 They went to the fucking store, bought it off the shelf, opened it up, tested it, it had that shit in it. 1.00

00:21:30.000 So these people... 1.00

00:21:32.000 We've said it time and time again, folks.

00:21:34.000 There's people that are selling these things in vitamin stores and these muscle building things and...

00:21:41.000 There's some people that might say that it has the ingredients on the list, which are all things that have been shown to help build your body up, but they throw other stuff in there too.

00:21:51.000 They just do.

00:21:52.000 They want their stuff to work.

00:21:54.000 So sometimes they make these things and they just put steroids in them. 0.99

00:21:58.000 Like, you could go to a fucking GNC, or a vitamin shop, and you can go and buy steroids. 0.99

00:22:05.000 Like, legit steroids. 0.99

00:22:06.000 Like, they will make you fucking big like steroids will. 0.99

00:22:09.000 Are you serious? 0.99

00:22:09.000 They keep catching them. 0.99

00:22:10.000 Not as good as the best of the best steroids, but at times there were.

00:22:15.000 I've talked about it before.

00:22:16.000 There was this stuff called Mag-10 that you could get.

00:22:18.000 It was so strong!

00:22:20.000 It was crazy how strong it was.

00:22:22.000 You just would get jacked!

00:22:24.000 There's so much of that stuff.

00:22:26.000 There's so many of those things out there.

00:22:28.000 And they just keep making them, and then they catch them, and then they have to change the name, and they come back.

00:22:34.000 That's how they do it with those boner pills, too. 0.99

00:22:36.000 Those boner pills are filled with, like, steroids and fucking Viagra. 0.99

00:22:41.000 Like, we need to do an on-it test of boner pills. 1.00

00:22:45.000 We need to, like, go buy whatever Red Band's taken and take it to a lab.

00:22:50.000 And just find out exactly...

00:22:51.000 Now, you buy those over-the-counter, right?

00:22:52.000 Not even over the counter.

00:22:54.000 It's like you buy them at gas stations only.

00:22:57.000 It's like regular stores aren't going to sell those rhino pills.

00:23:00.000 You have to buy them in the shittiest... 1.00

00:23:02.000 And what do they do to your dick? 1.00

00:23:03.000 Apparently, according to Red Band, I haven't taken them, they destroy it. 1.00

00:23:07.000 They turn it into a fucking cock-eating zombie. 1.00

00:23:10.000 Your dick just becomes a monster. 1.00

00:23:13.000 Your dick just... 1.00

00:23:14.000 Something happens to it. 1.00

00:23:16.000 It just gets so hard that you can't believe it.

00:23:19.000 You're filled with lust and passion.

00:23:22.000 People talk about it like they're crazed.

00:23:24.000 I'm like, you're taking meth.

00:23:25.000 You're taking meth mixed with Viagra.

00:23:27.000 Like someone's dosing them up with some ridiculously high levels of speed and probably some steroids and some meth and some Viagra.

00:23:38.000 Just...

00:23:39.000 I was out of...

00:23:40.000 They don't have to tell you what's in there.

00:23:42.000 Well, I was out of that Hemp Force Chocolate.

00:23:45.000 And I didn't have enough chance to send the kid an email and get it.

00:23:47.000 So I just went to the store.

00:23:49.000 And I asked the kid, I just want protein.

00:23:51.000 I didn't want to spend the $94 for the whey.

00:23:54.000 Because I didn't want all that protein powder.

00:23:57.000 So I went to the one on Lancashire. 0.99

00:23:59.000 And he goes, do you take any pre-workout shit? 0.99

00:24:01.000 And I go, I don't take none. 1.00

00:24:01.000 And I take the fucking quadriceps. 1.00

00:24:03.000 I didn't tell him that. 1.00

00:24:04.000 But I take like half of the shroom tech. 0.99

00:24:07.000 I don't want to have a fucking heart attack. 0.99

00:24:08.000 I take half of it. 1.00

00:24:09.000 Those fucking shroom techs, sometimes you're in the middle of class and you're gasping for air because so much air is coming into you and my body can't take it. 1.00

00:24:17.000 It's too much fucking air sometimes. 1.00

00:24:19.000 Like, you're like, fuck, this is too much. 1.00

00:24:21.000 So I just went there one day and the guy goes, take this. 0.99

00:24:23.000 It's like a drink before you work out again.

00:24:27.000 I had it in the bag and I drove and I get there and I go, let me just try it.

00:24:30.000 I tried half of it. 0.99

00:24:33.000 I did the class, but on the way home, I had the wildest fucking hard-on. 1.00

00:24:36.000 I had to go home, take a shower, and jerk off in the fucking shower because the hard-on was real. 1.00

00:24:41.000 Mama wasn't home. 1.00

00:24:42.000 Nobody was around. 0.99

00:24:43.000 I mean, it was fucking evil. 0.99

00:24:46.000 And even after I jerked off, it stayed hard, hard in the shower. 1.00

00:24:49.000 I was like, Jesus fucking Christ. 1.00

00:24:51.000 I gotta save this shit and drink it when Mama's around. 1.00

00:24:54.000 That's these things, man. 1.00

00:24:56.000 They're selling these things.

00:24:57.000 Then I got scared because after I jerked off like an hour later, my heart started having palpitations. 1.00

00:25:01.000 I'm like, yeah, enough with this shit. 1.00

00:25:04.000 Enough with this. 1.00

00:25:05.000 I don't do anything.

00:25:06.000 Listen, I've never been a proponent, is that the word?

00:25:10.000 Yes. 0.99

00:25:10.000 To fucking Red Bull. 0.99

00:25:11.000 Because when I was shooting a movie once, I was up all night snorting blow. 1.00

00:25:15.000 And I fucking drank three of those Red Bulls and I fell asleep. 1.00

00:25:18.000 So I said, fuck it. 1.00

00:25:19.000 There's nothing in that shit. 1.00

00:25:20.000 That shit don't work. 1.00

00:25:21.000 I drank three of those Red Bulls and was nodding out of the set. 1.00

00:25:24.000 So those things don't fucking work. 0.96

00:25:26.000 So I've never really been any energy drink. 0.97

00:25:29.000 I grew up without energy drinks.

00:25:31.000 You'd expect me to like energy drinks. 1.00

00:25:33.000 I hate all that shit. 1.00

00:25:34.000 I don't believe it. 1.00

00:25:36.000 When I was a beginning comic, I used to take no dose to drive all night.

00:25:41.000 That is horrible.

00:25:42.000 That stuff's nasty.

00:25:43.000 Just when I would drink it with Mountain Dew to really go deep and smoke a joint.

00:25:48.000 You drive all night like this, look.

00:25:50.000 You drive like that all night.

00:25:52.000 And then you pull over, you take a nap, and I would take a nap with the car on because it was the winter.

00:25:57.000 Like in those days, I had to drive.

00:25:58.000 I would have to do the late show as a feature and then drive back to Boulder overnight from Boise, Idaho. 0.98

00:26:05.000 Or wherever the fuck I was at. 0.99

00:26:07.000 Billings, Montana. 0.99

00:26:08.000 So I would drive all night to pick up the baby in those days. 0.99

00:26:13.000 I'd have to do whatever the fuck I had to do. 0.97

00:26:14.000 One night, Jamie, I pulled the car over, and it was freezing out. 0.98

00:26:17.000 I left the car on, and I fell asleep.

00:26:19.000 And when I woke up, I thought I lost control of the car.

00:26:22.000 You have no idea what happens to your heart.

00:26:24.000 Oh, my God.

00:26:24.000 When you fall asleep and then wake up, and I had the headlights on, and I saw the snow.

00:26:30.000 And I was like, ah, ah, ah! 0.68

00:26:32.000 And you grab the steering wheel and you put the brake on me and you're like, I'm not even fucking moving. 0.97

00:26:36.000 Oh my god.

00:26:37.000 So those no dozes with Mountain Dew.

00:26:39.000 Oh my boy, there you go.

00:26:42.000 Alan Joban just about to step into the octagon right now.

00:26:47.000 Great dude.

00:26:48.000 Great dude.

00:26:49.000 Very sweet.

00:26:49.000 I love that guy.

00:26:50.000 Always says hello.

00:26:51.000 He's the one of Eddie's longest students.

00:26:54.000 I've known that kid forever.

00:26:55.000 He's awesome.

00:26:56.000 He's always been awesome.

00:26:58.000 Great guy to train with.

00:27:00.000 Super cool.

00:27:01.000 He's been doing really well in the UFC, except the Einstein fight, you know, but that guy, Tumanoff is a beast, man.

00:27:10.000 Albert Tumanoff is just so technical.

00:27:12.000 His striking is just so good.

00:27:16.000 He's got another dude that Rafael Cordero has. 0.98

00:27:18.000 His hair's always fucked up. 0.98

00:27:20.000 Doesn't look like much of a fighter. 1.00

00:27:22.000 He got eye poked last time twice, and he just knocked the motherfucker out. 1.00

00:27:27.000 Baruch. 1.00

00:27:27.000 Oh, Baruch. 1.00

00:27:29.000 Dariush.

00:27:30.000 I like him, too.

00:27:31.000 I like Rafael Cordero.

00:27:32.000 But Neil Dariush is a really good jiu-jitsu player, too, man.

00:27:35.000 You see his jiu-jitsu?

00:27:36.000 No.

00:27:36.000 His kickboxing has come a long way with Cordero.

00:27:39.000 You know, his kickboxing is really good now.

00:27:41.000 It's excellent.

00:27:42.000 But his jiu-jitsu is nasty.

00:27:43.000 He keeps his guard down, like his hands low, which always...

00:27:47.000 Sometimes, yeah.

00:27:47.000 But Cordero is Cordero, so I trust they're up to something.

00:27:51.000 So it's none of my business. 0.99

00:27:52.000 I don't know what the fuck they do. 0.98

00:27:53.000 You know, Darius is a very smart guy. 1.00

00:27:56.000 Very smart guy.

00:27:57.000 And he's a hard worker and he'll get better.

00:28:00.000 I mean, right now he's cracking into that top ten realm.

00:28:05.000 He's a very, very good fighter.

00:28:08.000 Listen, brother.

00:28:09.000 Had a setback in the Chiesa fight, you know, Chiesa, Michael Chiesa choked him, but Chiesa, I'm telling you, man, Michael Chiesa has nasty back control. 0.86

00:28:18.000 I watch that kid's, the way he takes backs, the way he clamps down, he's got a super, like, very tight game.

00:28:25.000 Some guys just have a technique. 0.99

00:28:27.000 Like, remember Cody McKenzie had that fucking guillotine of death. 0.99

00:28:31.000 Like, if McKenzie caught you in that guillotine, man, he was putting dudes asleep. 0.99

00:28:34.000 And you look at him, not a physical specimen, you know?

00:28:38.000 Just looks like a regular dude.

00:28:40.000 He's not athletically gifted.

00:28:41.000 He just had this one technique, razor sharp.

00:28:45.000 Razor sharp.

00:28:46.000 And for, okay, it's four minutes and 50 seconds right now in round number one.

00:28:51.000 So that's the time stamp.

00:28:53.000 46, 45, 44, 43. You got it.

00:28:58.000 But Chiesa's got that with his back mount, man.

00:29:01.000 He gets that back mount on dudes.

00:29:02.000 That rear naked choke is a strong position for him.

00:29:08.000 Alan Joban looking very light on his feet here.

00:29:14.000 Listen, man, once you get to that elite level, you have to be very intelligent as a fighter.

00:29:19.000 There's no other way to improve that higher level.

00:29:22.000 No, no, no. 1.00

00:29:22.000 You're not a bar brother no more that goes in there with, I'm gonna punch him in the mouth mentality. 1.00

00:29:27.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:29:27.000 You figure out how to win the war, you train accordingly. 0.99

00:29:30.000 I mean, those guys are...

00:29:32.000 And that jiu-jitsu... 1.00

00:29:33.000 Oh, shit! 1.00

00:29:34.000 Big left hand, Joban. 1.00

00:29:35.000 That jiu-jitsu makes you so analytical when you're a high-level black belt.

00:29:39.000 It makes you think so much differently than, you know, just throwing kicks and punches, you know?

00:29:44.000 Yeah.

00:29:45.000 You have to think so much quickly.

00:29:46.000 When you roll with those high-level black belts, Game over. 0.99

00:29:50.000 I mean, it's just a...

00:29:53.000 Yeah, Joban's here in full guard.

00:29:56.000 I would like to see him pass.

00:29:58.000 I don't like this.

00:29:59.000 Yeah.

00:30:00.000 See?

00:30:00.000 And he got swept.

00:30:02.000 Now he's stuck in a standing guillotine, but only one arm in.

00:30:06.000 I don't ever like it when dudes lay in the guard.

00:30:08.000 I just think if you're on top and you're in the guard, you should at least attempt to pass.

00:30:14.000 Because if you can pass and get to a dominant position...

00:30:18.000 You establish that you have the better ground game, right?

00:30:21.000 And then you also have the opportunity to try to set some stuff up for real.

00:30:27.000 And you force someone to be completely defensive, because someone in the guard is still partially offensive.

00:30:32.000 They can still catch you.

00:30:33.000 When you get a guy in side control, you're almost 100% offensive, and he's almost 100% defensive.

00:30:40.000 There's only a couple things you can do from the bottom, like with elbows, and maybe you can catch a Kimura if the guy's not paying attention. 0.87

00:30:47.000 But for the most part, when you're in the guard, like we were talking about with Verdum, there's still guys that can fuck you up from there. 0.97

00:30:54.000 Brian Ortega, he will fuck you up from inside his guard. 0.99

00:30:58.000 Lay in that dude's guard. 1.00

00:30:59.000 Good luck. 1.00

00:31:01.000 That guy will fuck people up in that guard. 0.99

00:31:07.000 I just think sometimes dudes try to play it safe. 0.99

00:31:10.000 You know, they get a guy down and they're inside of his guard and they just say, alright, let me just throw some punches here and see what's up.

00:31:16.000 And they just kind of cancel each other out. 0.99

00:31:20.000 So what you're saying is if you're in the closed guard, get the fuck out of there. 0.99

00:31:23.000 Yeah, don't get... 0.99

00:31:24.000 First of all, don't, like, fall into it.

00:31:27.000 And obviously easier said than done, right?

00:31:29.000 But don't choose to fall into it.

00:31:31.000 Treat it like it's a dangerous place.

00:31:33.000 Get out of there.

00:31:34.000 On everybody.

00:31:35.000 Even on guys that maybe their guard's not that good.

00:31:38.000 Pretend it is.

00:31:39.000 Treat everybody the same way. 1.00

00:31:40.000 Get the fuck... 1.00

00:31:41.000 Oh! 1.00

00:31:41.000 Head kick! 1.00

00:31:43.000 Oh, that was brutal.

00:31:44.000 This dude's done. 1.00

00:31:46.000 If this guy survives this, he is a fucking monster. 1.00

00:31:49.000 Oh, elbows. 1.00

00:31:52.000 Oh! 0.60

00:31:54.000 Wow, this dude is gutting it out.

00:31:57.000 He is gutting it out, man.

00:32:00.000 Look at this, he's surviving. 1.00

00:32:01.000 Come on, let's do this shit, Alan. 1.00

00:32:03.000 This dude's surviving. 1.00

00:32:04.000 Muhammad is tough as fuck, man. 1.00

00:32:06.000 He is tough as fuck. 1.00

00:32:08.000 Because he is not giving up at all, man. 1.00

00:32:12.000 Giving up his back.

00:32:13.000 Don't give up your back.

00:32:14.000 Oh, knee to the body.

00:32:16.000 Those knees against the fence are brutality, man.

00:32:20.000 Knees to the body against the fence, they're rough.

00:32:23.000 Like when Anderson got Chael Sonnen, that one.

00:32:26.000 Ooh, nice slice pass.

00:32:29.000 Keep going.

00:32:33.000 Mmm. 1.00

00:32:35.000 This Muhammad guy's a motherfucker, dude. 1.00

00:32:37.000 To survive that, he's getting back up to his feet. 1.00

00:32:42.000 Look at this shit. 1.00

00:32:43.000 And he rolls. 1.00

00:32:45.000 Joban on top.

00:32:49.000 Oh, he went crazy with the flying punch.

00:32:54.000 Joban's wrestling looks pretty good too, man.

00:32:58.000 Good defense here, but this Muhammad guy looks very strong. 1.00

00:33:02.000 I think Joban and those guys work out for kickboxing somewhere in North Hollywood.

00:33:07.000 Really?

00:33:07.000 Saxons?

00:33:08.000 Yeah, some badass school up there.

00:33:10.000 Is that in North Hollywood?

00:33:11.000 Yeah.

00:33:11.000 I think that was in Van Nuys.

00:33:12.000 Van Nuys.

00:33:13.000 Is it in Van Nuys?

00:33:15.000 Wherever Alder was.

00:33:17.000 Used to be.

00:33:18.000 Oh, yeah?

00:33:18.000 That school there.

00:33:19.000 I think one of the kids that goes to daycare trains with Alan, this kid goes.

00:33:24.000 Oh, okay.

00:33:24.000 He always tells me that's where they are.

00:33:25.000 Yeah, that Saxon gym is one of the best gyms around.

00:33:29.000 In this city for kickboxing.

00:33:33.000 A lot of guys out of there fight in local competitions.

00:33:37.000 He's got guys in Glory.

00:33:39.000 And he's got Allen and a bunch of other guys.

00:33:42.000 But very highly respected Jim. 1.00

00:33:46.000 Damn, Muhammad's a bad motherfucker. 1.00

00:33:49.000 That dude's tough. 1.00

00:33:50.000 Because he got clanged.

00:33:52.000 He got left-handed on the point of the chin.

00:33:56.000 I mean, that's a nice sort of hooking left hand.

00:34:00.000 And then clanger.

00:34:01.000 He got double clanged.

00:34:03.000 He got clanged with the shin and then clanged with the punch after it.

00:34:07.000 Dank!

00:34:08.000 That's a boom-boom. 1.00

00:34:10.000 That guy is tough as fuck. 0.99

00:34:21.000 So here's something that happens in exchanges like that. 0.99

00:34:24.000 Sometimes when a dude hurts a guy and then unloads on him, trying to finish him, but can't finish him.

00:34:33.000 Now, not a guy like Allen, because Allen's pretty experienced. 0.92

00:34:35.000 I don't think he emptied his gas tank, but guys have emptied their fucking gas tank trying to take a guy out, and then had to coast for the remaining second and third round. 0.96

00:34:44.000 Like, some guys, they're notorious for that. 0.98

00:34:47.000 Like, they open up on you, and if it, like, I'm looking at Allen right now, he looks really tired.

00:34:52.000 And some guys do that.

00:34:53.000 They'll open up with that first round, and they think they got a guy hurt.

00:34:57.000 But if the guy can survive, they've blown a lot of gas and a lot of adrenaline, too, because they got emotional.

00:35:05.000 They just went crazy after you. 0.92

00:35:07.000 And then when it doesn't happen and the guy survives and he's still there, there's just like a mindfuck going on. 0.95

00:35:14.000 Like, oh no, did I empty my gas tank?

00:35:16.000 Who was the big guy against that Fort Brock and had him and was punching him? 0.99

00:35:19.000 Shane motherfucking Carlin. 0.97

00:35:20.000 That's who that happened to him. 0.99

00:35:22.000 Yeah, for sure.

00:35:23.000 That's who that happened to that time.

00:35:24.000 It was a couple of the fighters.

00:35:25.000 And I didn't understand what you were saying at first.

00:35:27.000 If they gassed in the first round, your arms get tired.

00:35:30.000 I didn't understand that concept.

00:35:32.000 Then I saw it a couple times, and I was like, ah!

00:35:35.000 Well, Shane was a monster, dude. 0.96

00:35:38.000 I mean, he had just ridiculous punching power. 0.86

00:35:40.000 And he was just far more skillful, at the time at least, than Brock was standing.

00:35:47.000 Shane was a really good striker standing up.

00:35:50.000 His punches were short, and he had mad confidence in them.

00:35:55.000 Like, he would slug it out with anybody.

00:35:57.000 And one of the best examples of that, when he fought Gabriel Gonzaga, Gonzaga broke his nose.

00:36:03.000 Like, Gonzaga had him hurt.

00:36:05.000 He broke his nose and staggered him.

00:36:08.000 And then when Gonzaga moved in for the kill, Shane hit him with six inches of death.

00:36:13.000 Just this.

00:36:14.000 Thump! 0.84

00:36:15.000 That giant cinder block in the end of his impossibly thick arms, and he just punched through Gonzaga's head. 0.99

00:36:22.000 It was ridiculous. 0.96

00:36:24.000 He has these short punches that he hit Frank Mir with. 0.88

00:36:29.000 He tied up Frank Mir, he got him in a collar tie or something like that.

00:36:32.000 I forget what he did, or maybe overhooked him.

00:36:33.000 I forget what he did to control his body. 0.99

00:36:35.000 But then he just uppercutted the fuck out of him. 0.97

00:36:38.000 And it was just brutal. 0.99

00:36:40.000 The power and the speed and the fucking leverage of these shots. 0.99

00:36:45.000 I was like, Shane Carr was one of the scariest guys to have punch you. 0.99

00:36:49.000 Maybe ever.

00:36:51.000 Shane Carwin uncorks on you.

00:36:53.000 Like, I've watched that guy knock out a lot of dudes.

00:36:55.000 And there's something about him in particular, like his physical size and, you know, until his body started having, like, serious problems because of all his football career and, you know, just years of combat sports training.

00:37:08.000 You know, his body was giving him some real big problems with his back and stuff.

00:37:11.000 Now, what do you feel in the octagon when your arms get like that?

00:37:14.000 Do they just get heavy?

00:37:15.000 Acid fills your arms?

00:37:17.000 You'd have to talk to them, obviously, because I've never fought in the octagon.

00:37:22.000 Does it happen to boxers?

00:37:24.000 Yeah, sure.

00:37:24.000 Does this type of training happen to boxers where they get all...

00:37:27.000 Adrenaline dumps.

00:37:28.000 Adrenaline dumps are so real.

00:37:29.000 But there's also a thing about MMA versus boxing. 0.99

00:37:32.000 Five minutes is a long fucking time. 0.99

00:37:36.000 It's a long time. 1.00

00:37:38.000 And you can't sprint for five minutes.

00:37:40.000 No one can.

00:37:41.000 And so, with a guy like Joban, like, did he sprint there?

00:37:45.000 That's the question.

00:37:47.000 Did he sprint?

00:37:47.000 Did he go all out and then couldn't go any further and then had a minute 40 left in the round and Muhammad survives and Muhammad feels that.

00:37:54.000 He feels that Joban might have fucked up and emptied his gas tank. 0.86

00:37:57.000 Now here he's got Joban up against the cage. 0.99

00:38:00.000 Joban's moving around.

00:38:01.000 He looks a little slower.

00:38:03.000 You know, it gets interesting because that's a famous quote.

00:38:07.000 I think someone else said it, but Shael Sonnen is the one who told it to me.

00:38:13.000 He said that if you...

00:38:16.000 Try to take a guy out in the first round, but don't.

00:38:19.000 You most certainly lose a decision.

00:38:22.000 Or you're more likely to lose a decision.

00:38:26.000 Like you try to win the fight by knockout or don't win the fight at all because you're not going to have the gas to go three rounds.

00:38:34.000 Is there anything you could do in your strength and conditioning program to avoid that?

00:38:41.000 You can recover faster.

00:38:43.000 With the most efficient training and getting yourself in the very best peak shape, you can recover faster.

00:38:48.000 You know, the question is, okay, is a guy like Alan or is this gentleman Muhammad, are these guys in their optimum physical shape? 0.88

00:38:56.000 Well, you don't really know.

00:38:57.000 They're obviously in fantastic shape.

00:38:59.000 They're obviously elite athletes, but are they at their best?

00:39:03.000 I mean, if he was with Amar Marinovich or someone along those lines, I mean, who knows what a guy like that could do on a strength and conditioning level.

00:39:10.000 And so then it becomes a matter of how important is the strength and conditioning.

00:39:14.000 See, that's where guys like Marinovich and like even Nick Kurson, a lot of these guys, they differ from a lot of the pack.

00:39:20.000 They think it's the most important thing.

00:39:22.000 And I think he's right.

00:39:23.000 I think once you already learn how to fight, then it's almost less important To spend all the time boxing and sparring and almost more important to do drills and do mad strength and conditioning work.

00:39:36.000 I think you take less off your body.

00:39:39.000 You already know how to fight. 0.99

00:39:41.000 I mean, Alan Joban knows how to fucking fight. 0.99

00:39:43.000 This is not going to be a surprise for him. 0.98

00:39:46.000 How much fight training does he need to do versus conditioning training?

00:39:49.000 Because if he's in the same position here in this fight but had less time in camp hitting sparring partners but more time doing plyometrics and was much fresher and felt better in this round, the argument is that you're better off having the most fit Vehicle to do combat with,

00:40:09.000 like your mind already knows how to do combat, right?

00:40:12.000 You already know how to kick, you already know how to punch, you already know how to choke dudes.

00:40:14.000 You're not going to get much better at that in six weeks.

00:40:16.000 But here's what you can get better in six weeks. 0.98

00:40:18.000 You could ramp your cardio up to some fucking ungodly levels. 0.92

00:40:22.000 So the question becomes, should you invest all your time doing that? 0.97

00:40:28.000 Or should you invest your time in fight training?

00:40:31.000 And it's the great debate.

00:40:32.000 Now, we've had the discussion of Robbie Lawler.

00:40:36.000 That Robbie Lawler's training camps consist of wrestling and hitting the pads.

00:40:39.000 Used to.

00:40:40.000 Spars now.

00:40:41.000 He spars now.

00:40:42.000 I don't think it's a coincidence that the time that he's back sparring is also the time when he went on this unbelievably successful run in the UFC and is now the welterweight champ.

00:40:51.000 I don't think you can get away with not sparring.

00:40:53.000 I don't.

00:40:54.000 But some people do.

00:40:56.000 And some people think that you don't need to spar at all.

00:41:00.000 Or you spar very little.

00:41:01.000 And most of what you do is...

00:41:02.000 I mean, that works for them.

00:41:04.000 Some people think that sparring is the most important thing.

00:41:07.000 Eddie Alvarez went 150 rounds to prepare for Dos Anjos.

00:41:11.000 I'm sure Eddie Alvarez does everything else.

00:41:12.000 I'm sure he does strength and conditioning.

00:41:14.000 I know he does a lot of pad work.

00:41:15.000 I know he does everything.

00:41:16.000 He's an animal.

00:41:16.000 He leaves no stone unturned, right?

00:41:18.000 But that's a lot of sparring, right?

00:41:20.000 Some guys don't like to spar much at all.

00:41:23.000 Some guys spar very little.

00:41:24.000 Maybe spar real light.

00:41:26.000 Spar like once a week and they save themselves. 0.97

00:41:28.000 I mean, everybody's got their own method to prepare.

00:41:30.000 But...

00:41:31.000 Guys like Kurson, and I guess it's Marinovich's, this is their school of thought.

00:41:37.000 It's like for a guy like B.J. Penn.

00:41:39.000 Marinovich took B.J. Penn to his highest heights.

00:41:41.000 Like when they were training together, B.J. hated the training, but God damn was he unstoppable inside the octagon. 0.95

00:41:47.000 That was the phenom B.J. Penn. 0.97

00:41:50.000 That was the real prodigy.

00:41:52.000 When B.J. Penn was lightweight champion, like when he destroyed Sean Shirk, when he destroyed Diego Sanchez, God damn. 0.99

00:41:59.000 Damn, BJ was good. 0.99

00:42:01.000 For this brief time, this, you know, a few fights. 0.99

00:42:04.000 His cardio wasn't suspect at all.

00:42:06.000 At all with them.

00:42:07.000 At all with them.

00:42:09.000 But the training is just unbearable.

00:42:11.000 BJ did an interview about it where he's talking about how he couldn't even hold his baby in his arms, man.

00:42:16.000 He would get home at night and he couldn't hold his baby.

00:42:19.000 His arms were too tired.

00:42:20.000 Like, they break you.

00:42:21.000 They're all about physical conditioning. 0.99

00:42:24.000 I mean, Marinovich is a fucking mad scientist, man. 0.99

00:42:28.000 I'm giggling because Monday... 1.00

00:42:29.000 It was 4th of July, and me, the asshole, decides to go to jiu-jitsu. 1.00

00:42:34.000 And Mr. Crane goes, fuck it. 1.00

00:42:36.000 There's no teaching dick today. 1.00

00:42:38.000 Just seven-minute rounds. 0.97

00:42:39.000 I didn't know this.

00:42:40.000 I can't hear.

00:42:41.000 I'm deaf.

00:42:41.000 I can't hear.

00:42:42.000 I hear he puts the clock on, and you have to pick your sparring partner.

00:42:46.000 A girl picks me. 0.99

00:42:47.000 Dog, she fucks me up, right? 1.00

00:42:49.000 Because she's about a buck ten, this girl, with a tattoo over her eyebrow. 1.00

00:42:53.000 So I know I'm in for a fucking dogfight with this girl. 1.00

00:42:57.000 She can't pull me down. 0.99

00:42:58.000 She can't move me around, but she's taking my back, Joe Rogan.

00:43:01.000 I'm dying.

00:43:02.000 I'm huffing and puffing.

00:43:02.000 I look up and there's 3.50 left on the clock.

00:43:05.000 Three minutes and 30 minutes left. 0.99

00:43:06.000 I thought I was going to fucking die. 0.99

00:43:08.000 He made us do that seven times. 1.00

00:43:11.000 At the end, I just looked at him, Joe, and I was like, Jesus Christ, I don't know how you high-level motherfuckers do this. 0.99

00:43:16.000 Oh, yeah. 0.99

00:43:16.000 I couldn't even walk that night. 0.99

00:43:18.000 My legs were killing me.

00:43:19.000 But I will tell you what I've been doing over there, Joe, that's helped me a lot.

00:43:23.000 And it's right what you're saying, that technical fitness.

00:43:26.000 I do the 30-minute class after the jiu-jitsu class. 1.00

00:43:30.000 And it's just little exercises that you don't think much of, but next thing you know, shit's pouring out of you. 0.99

00:43:37.000 Are you doing it with that Kettle Jitsu guy, the guy on Instagram? 0.99

00:43:40.000 No, no, no.

00:43:40.000 He's my buddy, Joey Alvarado, good guy.

00:43:42.000 He's got a good Instagram page.

00:43:44.000 He really works hard at Joey Alvarado.

00:43:47.000 A lot of good videos.

00:43:47.000 He really does.

00:43:48.000 Good kettlebell exercises.

00:43:49.000 Yeah, he really does.

00:43:50.000 That's 6-3 in the morning, dog.

00:43:52.000 And he's a Jiu-Jitsu player, too, right?

00:43:54.000 He's a black belt.

00:43:55.000 He's a Machado black belt.

00:43:57.000 There you go.

00:43:58.000 That makes sense.

00:43:59.000 Because he had real good exercises, grappling exercises.

00:44:03.000 For grappling for jiu-jitsu. 0.99

00:44:04.000 That shit starts at 530 in the morning with him. 1.00

00:44:07.000 That's an animal, man. 1.00

00:44:08.000 530 kettlebells, 630 jiu-jitsu.

00:44:10.000 Then it closes down till 9. Then they start that tack fit.

00:44:14.000 Then they do no-gi.

00:44:16.000 Then they do drills.

00:44:17.000 Then they do the regular jiu-jitsu.

00:44:19.000 And there's people that stay there from 9 to 1, Joe Rogan.

00:44:22.000 Jesus Christ.

00:44:25.000 This is this dude I'm friends with, Jocko Willink.

00:44:29.000 He's a former Navy SEAL, and now he does like...

00:44:33.000 Does, like, seminars for businesses and stuff like that.

00:44:36.000 Teaches them how to motivate and how to lead groups. 0.99

00:44:40.000 This motherfucker's such a savage that every morning he takes a photo of his watch when he gets up to work out. 0.99

00:44:48.000 He works out every morning at 4.30. 1.00

00:44:52.000 But his Instagram is filled with these pictures of his watch at 4.30. 0.99

00:44:58.000 And you want to see some shit that makes you feel lazy. 1.00

00:45:01.000 Follow that guy's Instagram. 1.00

00:45:03.000 Every fucking day, 4.30, all caps, GET AFTER IT. And he's doing fucking deadlifts and squats and fucking throwing kettlebells around and doing dips. 1.00

00:45:13.000 You're not an early morning guy, aren't you? 1.00

00:45:15.000 No!

00:45:15.000 Not at all?

00:45:16.000 What's the earliest you throw weights around?

00:45:18.000 Sometimes I do. 0.99

00:45:19.000 Well, I do weird shit. 1.00

00:45:21.000 There's Jocko's... 1.00

00:45:22.000 Look at it. 1.00

00:45:22.000 Look at his fucking Instagram page. 1.00

00:45:24.000 It's all 4.13 in the morning. 1.00

00:45:26.000 Oh, I know who that guy is.

00:45:26.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:45:27.000 He trains with Dean Lister.

00:45:28.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:45:29.000 I know who that is.

00:45:30.000 Legit, legit top-level black belt, too.

00:45:33.000 I mean, I know for a fact that he goes to war with Lister. 0.98

00:45:35.000 And Lister is one of the best in the fucking world. 0.99

00:45:39.000 I mean... 0.99

00:45:39.000 And he's got a podcast, too. 0.99

00:45:40.000 The Jocko Podcast.

00:45:41.000 Jocko Podcast.

00:45:42.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:45:42.000 Yeah, I convinced him to do it after doing the podcast with him here.

00:45:47.000 Alan's in trouble.

00:45:49.000 He's in trouble.

00:45:50.000 He's taking some hard shots here.

00:45:51.000 He's getting roughed up.

00:45:52.000 That uppercut there, I think what we're talking about might have happened.

00:45:56.000 Yeah, it did happen.

00:45:57.000 You could see him on the ground.

00:45:59.000 He was tired.

00:46:00.000 I saw him after the first round.

00:46:02.000 Oh, he got spinning back-fisted.

00:46:04.000 He's alright.

00:46:05.000 They went to a decision.

00:46:06.000 I wonder who won.

00:46:08.000 Well, he won this round.

00:46:09.000 I think Alan won the first two.

00:46:13.000 That guy's a tough perk. 1.00

00:46:14.000 He's a tough motherfucker. 1.00

00:46:15.000 Congrats to him. 1.00

00:46:16.000 Win or lose.

00:46:17.000 I think he's 12-0 going into this.

00:46:21.000 I think this is his first UFC fight or no?

00:46:25.000 I don't think so.

00:46:26.000 I feel like he's had one. 0.99

00:46:28.000 But goddamn, I'm impressed with him, man. 0.99

00:46:34.000 This is his first one? 0.99

00:46:36.000 Yeah, because they didn't have a picture of him. 0.99

00:46:37.000 They didn't have a fucking picture of him. 0.99

00:46:38.000 He's really good, man. 0.99

00:46:40.000 He's really good. 0.99

00:46:42.000 He's tough as shit, too. 0.99

00:46:44.000 I mean, he got... 0.99

00:46:45.000 Oh, look at that right hand.

00:46:46.000 That's nice and clean.

00:46:47.000 He got clangered in that first round, man.

00:46:49.000 You can never forget that.

00:46:50.000 He got clangered twice.

00:46:52.000 He was in real trouble.

00:46:53.000 That guy gutted through that, weathered the storm, and started putting it on him beginning sometime in the second round.

00:47:02.000 Look at this.

00:47:03.000 Nice combinations, man.

00:47:06.000 Sometimes I'm up at 4.30.

00:47:07.000 Jesus Christ.

00:47:08.000 I drink a glass of water with ice in it to get everything going.

00:47:11.000 I make a little coffee.

00:47:13.000 I make an almond smoothie, and it's like 5.45, and I go, maybe I'll go to 6.30 jujitsu class.

00:47:19.000 Whoa. 1.00

00:47:19.000 And I'm like, fuck you. 1.00

00:47:23.000 Most heart attacks happen between 6 a.m. 1.00

00:47:25.000 and 12, bitch. 1.00

00:47:26.000 Do they? 1.00

00:47:27.000 I don't do a jumping jack till 12. You understand me?

00:47:29.000 Nothing.

00:47:30.000 Nothing.

00:47:31.000 And now they're saying, if you're older than 50, they want you to take a baby aspirin and drink a glass of water.

00:47:39.000 So now I'm pissing all night. 0.99

00:47:41.000 I go on a fucking drought after 6 so I can sleep fucking 9 hours straight without pissing. 0.99

00:47:48.000 Now they want you to drink a big glass of water at midnight before you fucking go to bed. 1.00

00:47:51.000 Yeah, that's not good for your sleep patterns. 0.98

00:47:53.000 No, but that's what they said you need to do.

00:47:56.000 Why do you need to do that?

00:47:57.000 I don't know.

00:47:57.000 Isn't it important to sleep?

00:47:59.000 Check out the journal of this?

00:48:01.000 One of those things?

00:48:03.000 Yeah, so now they're saying a baby aspen in a glass of water.

00:48:06.000 Give me a guess.

00:48:07.000 Who wins?

00:48:07.000 Alan Joban.

00:48:10.000 28-27.

00:48:12.000 29-28.

00:48:13.000 29-27.

00:48:18.000 Alan Joban.

00:48:19.000 Well, he better get on his knees and thank the Lord.

00:48:22.000 He better get on his knees and thank the Lord and Satan and whoever else.

00:48:26.000 Well...

00:48:27.000 Because he knows.

00:48:28.000 He was getting hit at the end.

00:48:29.000 He knows.

00:48:29.000 Yeah.

00:48:30.000 He's gonna walk out of there and go, Jesus, I was running out of...

00:48:32.000 Yeah.

00:48:34.000 He was in trouble.

00:48:37.000 ...

00:48:47.000 Alan Joban just giving that dude props.

00:48:49.000 That's what a nice guy Alan Joban is.

00:49:05.000 Yeah, he should have used better wording.

00:49:08.000 I mean, I see what he's trying to do, but he shouldn't say took him out because he didn't take that dude out.

00:49:12.000 I mean, he hurt him in the first round.

00:49:17.000 Not making excuses, but I'm pretty certain I broke my hand in the second round.

00:49:23.000 Clangor.

00:49:35.000 Clangor.

00:49:41.000 So, Alan Joban broke his hand in that second round.

00:49:44.000 People that listen to this are probably like, what happened to them?

00:49:46.000 Did they go away?

00:49:48.000 Sorry, we're listening.

00:49:49.000 That's the problem with actually knowing a dude and being friends with a dude and then doing commentary on his fights and watching him fight.

00:49:57.000 It's like, I just know him.

00:49:59.000 Such a nice dude.

00:50:00.000 So, what's the earliest you can work out, my brother?

00:50:02.000 I'll get up sometimes before the dawn.

00:50:05.000 And work out.

00:50:06.000 What time is that?

00:50:07.000 I don't know.

00:50:07.000 Sometimes I get up to pee, right?

00:50:09.000 It might be like 5 o'clock in the morning.

00:50:11.000 And I just, as like a little mental exercise, I say, I'm just going to go work out.

00:50:14.000 And I just force myself to go work out.

00:50:16.000 No reefer, no food, no nothing. 0.67

00:50:19.000 Straight up gangster. 0.86

00:50:19.000 Just get some water. 0.86

00:50:20.000 Bad breath going there.

00:50:21.000 Yeah.

00:50:22.000 And how long do you, is it full or is it just to get the blood going?

00:50:26.000 Depends.

00:50:26.000 You know, but it's always got to be something hard to do.

00:50:29.000 Powerful Robbie Lawler.

00:50:33.000 Usually it's, you know, I'll do some chin-ups, I'll do some kettlebell work.

00:50:37.000 Just do like 40 minutes, maybe more, maybe an hour.

00:50:40.000 And you go back to bed and who can sleep after that? 0.98

00:50:42.000 No, who can fucking sleep after that? 0.98

00:50:44.000 Sometimes I stay up. 0.98

00:50:45.000 I don't know, man.

00:50:46.000 Sometimes I like to go up, get up early rather, because...

00:50:52.000 I like to go outside when everything's coming on.

00:50:54.000 There's something weird about seeing people wake up, sort of like seeing people leave their houses and seeing the hustle and bustle as they're starting to get ready to go to work.

00:51:05.000 You can actually kind of see it in the distance all spread out when you get up in the morning and you go sit outside on your porch or something like that and look around.

00:51:14.000 There's something about, it just makes you really recognize this strange cycle, strange cycle that we do every night. 0.99

00:51:23.000 Sleep and rise, and sleep and rise, and get caught up in the momentum, and keep doing the same thing over and over again, trying to figure out what the fuck you're doing.

00:51:32.000 Sometimes when you watch other people doing it, you kind of realize, it's like, oh, this is like a weird, we're like patterned things. 0.92

00:51:42.000 We follow patterns.

00:51:44.000 Like humans on a whole, we love to follow patterns.

00:51:48.000 We follow like the same patterns over and over and over and over again.

00:51:52.000 Same routes to work. 1.00

00:51:55.000 Same bullshit you're dealing with at the office, you know? 1.00

00:51:58.000 Day in, day out, day in, day out. 1.00

00:52:00.000 When you watch people do it, like when you get up early, if you don't have to go somewhere, and you watch the city come alive, It's like, almost like you get to see the fucking work behind the curtain before the play plays out. 0.82

00:52:13.000 It's like you get to see, like, oh, this is weird.

00:52:17.000 When was the last time you got up for work a week in a row?

00:52:20.000 Like, Fear Factor.

00:52:21.000 Yeah, that was the last time I had a job.

00:52:23.000 That's it. 1.00

00:52:23.000 That's the last time I had a fucking job. 1.00

00:52:25.000 I hated those homes. 0.99

00:52:26.000 You know, I came from a home where the mornings were, there wasn't much action. 1.00

00:52:31.000 I got up, I made my own fucking cereal. 0.99

00:52:34.000 I took a shower. 0.99

00:52:36.000 I dressed myself on the way out.

00:52:38.000 I said, Ma, see you later.

00:52:39.000 That's it.

00:52:40.000 But then you went to people's homes who, it was heavy duty.

00:52:43.000 They were going to work. 1.00

00:52:44.000 And I would sit there and go, fuck this shit. 1.00

00:52:47.000 I hate that action in the morning. 1.00

00:52:49.000 Where's my toothbrush? 1.00

00:52:51.000 Where's my fucking shirt? 1.00

00:52:52.000 You know, four people yelling. 1.00

00:52:55.000 Get out of the fucking bathroom. 1.00

00:52:56.000 You go in the bathroom, it smells like 10 shits. 1.00

00:52:59.000 You know, you're like, fuck this, you know. 1.00

00:53:01.000 So I swore to God, if I ever had a family, I don't want that early morning fucking riffraff. 1.00

00:53:06.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:53:07.000 I like, she's got riffraff in the morning, there's drama with her in the morning, but not really.

00:53:11.000 She's three and a half now.

00:53:12.000 She wakes up, she puts a TV on, she gets her own chocolate milk.

00:53:16.000 You know, I don't give up. 0.99

00:53:17.000 Well, I gotta make it for her and I gotta shake it with her and do the whole fucking thing. 1.00

00:53:20.000 But besides that, she leaves me the fuck alone. 0.99

00:53:23.000 There's no drama. 0.99

00:53:24.000 I don't like that early morning drama.

00:53:26.000 Once I hit life, okay, that's drama.

00:53:28.000 I know what you're saying, like running out the door. 1.00

00:53:31.000 Yeah, I don't want that shit. 1.00

00:53:32.000 Fuck it. 1.00

00:53:33.000 I'd rather people relax. 1.00

00:53:34.000 I walk her.

00:53:35.000 I like that slow...

00:53:39.000 Yeah, I do too.

00:53:41.000 It's really weird.

00:53:42.000 I appreciate the fives in the mornings.

00:53:44.000 I appreciate the six in the mornings.

00:53:46.000 I love going outside and smoking and watching.

00:53:50.000 But I also appreciate two in the mornings. 0.98

00:53:52.000 Sometimes when I get back to the valley, I just sit on my balcony and look out and I go, Jesus Christ, it's fucking nothing. 0.98

00:53:58.000 That's it. 0.98

00:53:58.000 We're in space. 0.98

00:53:59.000 This is it.

00:54:00.000 I'm in space. 0.99

00:54:01.000 It's me and that fucking moon and those three stars around it. 0.97

00:54:04.000 I think you need a little place where you can go occasionally. 0.99

00:54:09.000 Where you don't hear anybody.

00:54:11.000 Nobody's talking.

00:54:12.000 Where you just look up.

00:54:14.000 Just look up by yourself.

00:54:16.000 I think we all need that.

00:54:17.000 We miss that.

00:54:18.000 And that's a really interesting Aspect of civilization that as we become more and more dependent upon technology more and more into lights We were less and less aware of the fact that we're in space It's all it's all happening together It's like the technology that's gonna take people past where we are now to some strange new world in the next decade or hundred years or whenever the next fucking

00:54:48.000 crazy invention comes out and You know, I like getting up at 5, and I don't turn the TV on, I don't check Twitter.

00:54:58.000 That's good.

00:54:59.000 I don't do nothing.

00:55:00.000 That's good.

00:55:01.000 I charge my phone in the living room, and I look at it to see if somebody called in an emergency.

00:55:07.000 Unless I see missed call, missed call, I put the phone down. 0.98

00:55:11.000 For two hours, I don't do dick in the morning. 0.93

00:55:13.000 I have a notebook in front of me, I drink coffee. 0.97

00:55:15.000 After about 30 minutes, I go smoke some pot and really kick it up and maybe eat a nicotine gum and get the party really started.

00:55:22.000 And for two hours, I just drain what's in your coconut.

00:55:26.000 I think about the night before.

00:55:28.000 I didn't tape that set last night, but I said one thing on stage that I liked.

00:55:33.000 And I'll write that down. 0.98

00:55:34.000 And I have a page of just shit I said on stage the night before. 0.99

00:55:37.000 It's kind of going anywhere. 0.99

00:55:38.000 And you like the nicotine gum?

00:55:40.000 Gives you a little stimulant?

00:55:41.000 Is that the deal?

00:55:42.000 Yeah, in the morning with coffee.

00:55:44.000 Look at this guy.

00:55:45.000 He keeps losing more and more weight.

00:55:47.000 What's he fighting at?

00:55:48.000 145?

00:55:48.000 Well, he's fighting on Saturday, so he's in weight cutting already.

00:55:53.000 So he's dehydrated there. 0.98

00:55:55.000 You could fucking tell. 0.99

00:55:56.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:55:57.000 I mean, that's weird.

00:55:58.000 But is he fighting 145?

00:55:59.000 I think he's fighting 45. Wait a minute.

00:56:03.000 Who's he fighting this weekend?

00:56:04.000 Jim Miller.

00:56:05.000 No, I think he's fighting 55. Joe Lozon.

00:56:07.000 Joe Lozon.

00:56:08.000 Is it 45?

00:56:08.000 He's fighting Takenomi.

00:56:10.000 Oh, that's right.

00:56:12.000 Miller's fighting Gomi. 0.98

00:56:14.000 That's the best, best, under, under, undercard of all fucking time. 0.96

00:56:18.000 I think Diego's fighting 55. I think 45 was too much for him. 0.97

00:56:23.000 Yeah, he looks 45 right now.

00:56:26.000 55, 155. Yeah, 155. But he's the kind of guy that even at 55 is going to cut weight.

00:56:33.000 He's going to get a little bigger and drop down.

00:56:36.000 Who is he fighting again?

00:56:37.000 Joe Lozon.

00:56:37.000 Joe Lozon, that's right.

00:56:39.000 That's going to be a wild ass fight. 0.99

00:56:41.000 Joe Lozon has been in some goddamn wars over the last few years. 0.99

00:56:46.000 Look at that early prelim. 0.99

00:56:48.000 Tremendous.

00:56:49.000 You could sell that.

00:56:50.000 That's incredible.

00:56:51.000 That's incredible.

00:56:52.000 DC is still supposed to fight someone?

00:56:54.000 Yep.

00:56:55.000 Any idea who it could be?

00:56:56.000 Do you think I'm going to tell you? 1.00

00:56:57.000 What are you, a fucking reporter? 1.00

00:56:58.000 Listen to this. 1.00

00:56:59.000 Dude, I don't know. 1.00

00:57:00.000 Next thing you know, you're banned from the fucking fights and shit. 1.00

00:57:04.000 He can't fight twice in the weekend. 1.00

00:57:06.000 I know a few things, but I can't talk about them.

00:57:09.000 I know a few things about other things.

00:57:12.000 I know some things.

00:57:15.000 I can say nothing.

00:57:16.000 You don't know nothing.

00:57:18.000 I don't know nothing.

00:57:19.000 I don't see nothing.

00:57:20.000 I'll tell you what, this John Jones thing like literally broke my heart.

00:57:24.000 I mean, when you said it to me, it was like a distant relative died.

00:57:29.000 Not like a close one.

00:57:30.000 Like, oh, Aunt Sue? 1.00

00:57:32.000 Fuck. 1.00

00:57:33.000 I remember her. 1.00

00:57:35.000 Like a relative that I haven't seen since I was 15. I'm reading that there was two different substances that were in there, not just one, substance two.

00:57:43.000 Oh yeah?

00:57:44.000 That's what you're reading?

00:57:45.000 Which website?

00:57:46.000 I don't know where I lost that.

00:57:49.000 I pulled it off.

00:57:51.000 What I have left up is what he said about it, and it was like a substance he couldn't pronounce.

00:57:55.000 Okay.

00:57:55.000 But I haven't...

00:57:57.000 Well, that's not entirely what I hear.

00:58:04.000 I can pronounce both of the substances that I heard.

00:58:08.000 Jamie, how many you want?

00:58:10.000 What are you doing in all these stars of death?

00:58:13.000 You know, the number?

00:58:15.000 200. Jesus Christ, Joey.

00:58:18.000 You're just chewing this.

00:58:20.000 You just said 200. You just threw two of them in your mouth.

00:58:22.000 Three.

00:58:23.000 You want four to get them part of this guy?

00:58:25.000 Oh, my God!

00:58:28.000 How are you doing that?

00:58:29.000 How can you do that?

00:58:30.000 How does your body hold up? 0.51

00:58:32.000 I'm a savage.

00:58:33.000 This and CBD oil.

00:58:34.000 I got the glue that keeps the bones together.

00:58:37.000 You know what I'm saying?

00:58:38.000 Your inflammation level must be zero.

00:58:41.000 If pot is anti-inflammatory, which apparently it is, your inflammation level is nothing.

00:58:46.000 The CBD oil I'm getting is 51%, this honey oil from Hawaii.

00:58:49.000 Wow.

00:58:50.000 Let me tell you something.

00:58:50.000 Three, four drops in the morning.

00:58:52.000 I do it after the almond shake.

00:58:54.000 I let the almond shake leave my mouth and I put that thing and I hold it for 60 seconds.

00:58:58.000 There's times I go home. 1.00

00:58:59.000 I'm an old fat fuck, man. 1.00

00:59:01.000 I go home. 1.00

00:59:02.000 I spar two times.

00:59:03.000 I'm done.

00:59:03.000 I go home.

00:59:04.000 I can feel my legs.

00:59:05.000 They feel like they're swollen.

00:59:09.000 I do Tylenol, the acetophen, and I do three or four of those drops, baby, and the next day I'm ready to rock again.

00:59:15.000 Wow.

00:59:16.000 You know, I don't know exactly what the CBD oil...

00:59:19.000 Every time I look up benefits, they tell you one more.

00:59:22.000 You read now that it prevents dementia. 1.00

00:59:24.000 You know, you read all these fucking things. 1.00

00:59:26.000 They've been hiding this shit. 1.00

00:59:28.000 They've been hiding this shit from America, man. 1.00

00:59:31.000 Well, because pot's been illegal, they haven't been able to give people CBD oil. 1.00

00:59:37.000 I mean, it has low levels of THC. You'll test positive for THC with a lot of it.

00:59:41.000 No, but now it's legal in 50 states, and you can smell it, so it's got no teeth.

00:59:45.000 The only reason why that's going on is because you don't test positive, they're saying.

00:59:49.000 Well, they must be way better at it now.

00:59:51.000 Yeah, no, now they're really getting it down.

00:59:52.000 But it's an element of marijuana.

00:59:55.000 Absolutely.

00:59:56.000 There's got to be a by the way, yeah.

00:59:58.000 Yeah, they can make strains that are higher in CBD oil.

01:00:01.000 I mean, maybe they figured out a way to extract CBD oil 100% pure where there's no residue of THC whatsoever.

01:00:07.000 They clean that out and then they add a little THC to it because...

01:00:11.000 Counterbalance with the THC, that's what gets everything.

01:00:14.000 That's what works on those tumors. 0.73

01:00:16.000 Oh, okay.

01:00:17.000 Yeah, that CBD oil is supposed to be amazing for inflammation, though.

01:00:23.000 Yeah, that's a real unfortunate thing that they did that.

01:00:27.000 They kept this illegal for so long. 0.85

01:00:30.000 It helped a few people profit, and it fucked a lot of people over.

01:00:34.000 It fucked a lot of people over, not just because people got locked up in jail, but because people got the wrong impression of an awesome plant.

01:00:44.000 The really crazy thing was that I was never familiar with holistic medicine until I moved to Boulder. 0.99

01:00:49.000 And I thought these people were fucking quacks. 1.00

01:00:51.000 Like, they'd talk to me and I'd go, Jesus fucking Christ! 1.00

01:00:55.000 But then you start paying attention to them. 0.99

01:00:57.000 They do a touch here, a touch there. 0.99

01:00:59.000 They tell you to eat something, and you're like, wait a second, I don't have that fucking pain no more. 0.97

01:01:03.000 What'd you do? 1.00

01:01:05.000 You know, like, what the fuck did you do? 0.99

01:01:06.000 You know, Boulder is the home of that stuff. 1.00

01:01:08.000 Right.

01:01:09.000 It's the home of that stuff.

01:01:10.000 It's where it breeds out to the rest of the country.

01:01:12.000 Do you believe in that stuff?

01:01:13.000 Do you believe people have, like, the voodoo touch, and they can rub your back, and all of a sudden it feels better? 0.99

01:01:17.000 I'm not sure.

01:01:20.000 I mean, Hegan's got the Indian. 0.99

01:01:22.000 The Indian will touch you a couple ways and you're alright. 1.00

01:01:25.000 There's this other guy that says your frame is bad.

01:01:27.000 You know, all that stuff.

01:01:28.000 I'm not sure.

01:01:29.000 But you know what, man?

01:01:30.000 A year ago when I would see movement training, I thought it was crazy.

01:01:34.000 And now I think it makes a lot of sense.

01:01:36.000 And now I see a lot of high-level jiu-jitsu schools incorporating that as a class in their workouts.

01:01:42.000 So it's got to be doing something for you.

01:01:44.000 That stuff that the guy did in the beginning, Hickson, Of his documentary, all that stuff.

01:01:50.000 It looks very simple.

01:01:52.000 It's very similar, too.

01:01:54.000 Very similar.

01:01:55.000 Who knows, bro?

01:01:56.000 We've evolved. 0.99

01:01:57.000 We've evolved at every fucking level, from technology to MMA training. 0.98

01:02:01.000 Ten years ago, they put a chicken on the floor, and you chased it for speed. 0.99

01:02:05.000 Whatever the fuck you did in those days, I don't know. 0.98

01:02:08.000 Now it's completely different. 0.99

01:02:09.000 Well, that was what was so interesting about Hickson.

01:02:11.000 It was that Hickson figured this out in 1994. I mean, that guy was a yogi.

01:02:16.000 He was a legitimate yogi. 0.99

01:02:18.000 I mean, Hickson does some spectacular shit. 1.00

01:02:20.000 He'll stand on a balance bar and do a full split, standing up, grabs his foot, and puts it over his head like a fucking ballerina. 1.00

01:02:29.000 Plus, he'll choke you out. 0.99

01:02:32.000 I mean, his ability to control his body is really freaky.

01:02:36.000 Like, he was an incredible bodyweight athlete.

01:02:41.000 Like, the stuff that he could do with his body, just in terms of, like, gymnastic movements and stuff like that, yoga movements and stretching movements, like, very, very unusually dexterous.

01:02:51.000 Dexterous?

01:02:51.000 Is that the word?

01:02:52.000 Yeah.

01:02:53.000 Good dexterity, amazing dexterity, but just his jujitsu was so high level on top of that. 0.94

01:02:59.000 So he had this deep knowledge of jujitsu, of all the positions, like his basics were so fucking good.

01:03:07.000 Everything, like, to this day, him and his son Krohn They use the same standard jujitsu that everyone has always used. 0.94

01:03:17.000 There's not like a lot of fancy, crazy, weird shit you've never seen before. 0.93

01:03:22.000 Triangles, arm bars, chokes. 0.98

01:03:24.000 And they're just razor sharp at them.

01:03:26.000 And that's like a Gracie family thing. 1.00

01:03:28.000 You think about like Hodger, same shit. 0.99

01:03:30.000 Like Dar's choke, I guess, like the most unconventional thing that he does a lot of the time. 0.99

01:03:34.000 He does like a standard Gracie attack.

01:03:37.000 Arm bars, triangles, guillotines, chokes.

01:03:40.000 It's like they have that style of attack, and especially Hickson and his son Krohn is just at this ninja level, this monk level.

01:03:50.000 Where it's just, they do the standard jiu-jitsu.

01:03:53.000 There's no crazy, weird tricks coming your way.

01:03:55.000 No barambolos, no spider guard.

01:03:57.000 I mean, they know it, I'm sure.

01:03:59.000 I'm sure he could do it.

01:04:00.000 I mean, I'm sure every high-level guy is aware of pretty much every technique at this point.

01:04:05.000 Like, if they're competitive, or if they train in a competitive gym, or they're curious, or they work with athletes.

01:04:11.000 Look at Derrick Brunson.

01:04:12.000 He's fighting out of Houston, Texas.

01:04:14.000 You know what he's thinking about right now, right? 1.00

01:04:16.000 He's like, I'm knocking this motherfucker out so I can go back and get myself some barbecue in this motherfucking shit. 1.00

01:04:23.000 Maybe he's thinking about Roy Nelson as if he was a white cop. 1.00

01:04:32.000 It's a fucking nightmare what's going on out there, Joe. 0.98

01:04:34.000 Jamie, can you put the card up on one of the TVs so we can see what's coming up next? 0.98

01:04:39.000 There's only one fight left after this.

01:04:42.000 Oh, really?

01:04:42.000 Yeah, that's it.

01:04:44.000 It's this and Dos Anjos.

01:04:47.000 The Dos Anjos fight's a five-rounder, right?

01:04:49.000 Yeah.

01:04:52.000 Roy Nelson, I knew him back in the day when he was just a jiu-jitsu guy before he ever did any MMA. Really?

01:04:58.000 Yeah.

01:04:59.000 I'm pretty sure he was in Brazil with us when Eddie had that match with Hoyler.

01:05:05.000 I flew down with him.

01:05:06.000 That was 2003. Roy Nelson was a real high-level grappler.

01:05:15.000 He beat Frank Mir in a grappling competition, a straight grappling competition, like some ridiculous amount. 0.96

01:05:21.000 Like, just outpointed the shit out of him. 0.59

01:05:27.000 But, uh, that was like the Frank Mir lazy days. 0.97

01:05:31.000 Frank Mir has gone through, you know, days where he's less dedicated, days where he's more dedicated.

01:05:36.000 Well, he's asking to be released now, man.

01:05:39.000 Well, something happened.

01:05:41.000 There's some drug test issues.

01:05:43.000 What was the Frank Mir drug test issue?

01:05:45.000 Was it a steroid thing?

01:05:46.000 He had kangaroo meat.

01:05:49.000 That's right, right? 0.99

01:05:49.000 And they said that they tested that they put the steroids in the kangaroo meat or some shit. 0.99

01:05:54.000 Wait a minute, you serious? 0.99

01:05:55.000 No, yeah, that's what he said.

01:05:57.000 He ate kangaroo.

01:05:58.000 Oh.

01:05:58.000 When he went to Australia.

01:05:59.000 He tested positive after Australia.

01:06:01.000 Come on.

01:06:02.000 He really blamed it on kangaroo. 0.99

01:06:03.000 Damn, he's Roy Nelson. 0.99

01:06:04.000 Knees to the thigh are impressive. 0.99

01:06:06.000 I like what he's doing there.

01:06:06.000 He really did say that.

01:06:07.000 Yeah, he really did say that.

01:06:09.000 Oh, my God.

01:06:10.000 That's what he ate.

01:06:11.000 What?

01:06:12.000 He said that maybe they put a lot of...

01:06:15.000 I swear to God.

01:06:17.000 Mere questioned in April if his positive test could be the result of tainted kangaroo meat he consumed in Australia.

01:06:23.000 I have a feeling he did that with a half a smile on his face. 1.00

01:06:27.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

01:06:29.000 Yeah, Derrick Brunson. 1.00

01:06:29.000 I told you. 1.00

01:06:30.000 Derrick's like, wait a second.

01:06:31.000 I gotta get this out of Las Vegas. 1.00

01:06:33.000 Oh, shit. 0.99

01:06:35.000 It's Derrick Lewis. 1.00

01:06:36.000 What did I call him?

01:06:37.000 Derrick Brunson?

01:06:38.000 Sorry about that.

01:06:39.000 Um... 0.99

01:06:44.000 See, now this is a bad spot for him because Roy has a fucking nasty ground game. 0.99

01:06:49.000 Everybody thinks of Roy as being this dude who just beats you up if you stand and trade with him. 1.00

01:06:53.000 But Roy can control motherfuckers on the ground, man. 0.97

01:06:57.000 You know, he lost to Andrzej Orlovski in Elite XC, but that's what I detail or what I call one of the most crooked organizations that ever showed MMA. Crooked in not maybe that they cheated, 0.99

01:07:13.000 But crooked in, like, the way they interpreted the rules of MMA, they would stand people up if they were down for, like, 15 seconds.

01:07:20.000 Like, if you went to the ground, you gotta submit somebody QUICK. They were just standing people up.

01:07:25.000 Oh, damn. 1.00

01:07:25.000 Jesus Christ. 1.00

01:07:26.000 Oh, Jesus. 0.89

01:07:27.000 Roy just got blasted in the gut.

01:07:29.000 And another one to the gut. 0.97

01:07:31.000 And to the face. 1.00

01:07:32.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

01:07:34.000 Oh, Roy's in trouble! 1.00

01:07:36.000 Oh, knee to the body! 0.96

01:07:39.000 Oh, he got that gable grip, though.

01:07:40.000 Can he get him down?

01:07:41.000 He got the S-grip, rather. 0.99

01:07:44.000 Damn, this is a fight for his life here. 0.99

01:07:47.000 Derrick Lewis can punch, man. 0.99

01:07:49.000 That's where his experience comes in, though. 0.99

01:07:51.000 He got him off him, gave him a little chance to breathe and fucking think, clear his hair, his head. 0.96

01:07:56.000 He's still in trouble, dude. 0.99

01:08:03.000 Lewis can crack, man.

01:08:04.000 He really hits hard.

01:08:08.000 That was an excellent exchange, too.

01:08:14.000 Ooh, crazy sport.

01:08:16.000 What were we talking about right before this?

01:08:19.000 We were talking about something super important. 0.99

01:08:24.000 CBD oil, shit like that. 0.98

01:08:25.000 It started to bring up what's going on in America. 1.00

01:08:30.000 Oh, the shooting things?

01:08:32.000 There's an active situation going on too right now in Dallas.

01:08:35.000 What's going on?

01:08:36.000 There's supposedly a shooter shooting cops right now during a protest. 1.00

01:08:40.000 No shit, no shit. 1.00

01:08:41.000 This is what's going to happen. 1.00

01:08:43.000 No shit. 0.99

01:08:44.000 I told Tate today. 0.99

01:08:45.000 Tate called me.

01:08:45.000 He goes, listen, Tate!

01:08:46.000 I go, listen, six black guys are going to get together and start ambushing motherfuckers. 1.00

01:08:51.000 And that's it. 1.00

01:08:51.000 This is going to go, because you can't keep doing this. 1.00

01:08:54.000 Oh! 1.00

01:08:55.000 Yeah, this is fucked up. 1.00

01:08:57.000 Roy's taking some bombs, man. 1.00

01:08:58.000 Roy's in trouble.

01:09:00.000 Jesus, Derek is in excellent shape, too, man. 0.99

01:09:02.000 Because he's hitting them with some hard fucking shots, and he keeps coming forward. 0.99

01:09:06.000 And Roy can take a punch like no other, and he gets the takedown. 1.00

01:09:10.000 Goddamn, full mount, not good. 0.98

01:09:12.000 No bueno for Derek. 0.99

01:09:14.000 This could be a wrap, man.

01:09:16.000 I'm telling you.

01:09:16.000 Oh, the end of the round!

01:09:19.000 Dude, Roy Nelson mounted on you is one of the worst situations ever.

01:09:23.000 That gut and all that body weight is all centered.

01:09:26.000 It's like having... 1.00

01:09:29.000 Like a giant 400-pound kettlebell sitting on your dick. 1.00

01:09:33.000 Like the way he mounts you. 1.00

01:09:35.000 You know, I don't really side control people.

01:09:37.000 I feel bad. 0.99

01:09:39.000 Especially when I'm sweating and shit. 1.00

01:09:40.000 They smell my stomach juice and pizzas and pretzel sticks. 1.00

01:09:44.000 Stomach juice! 1.00

01:09:45.000 Fuck you! 1.00

01:09:46.000 Stomach juice. 1.00

01:09:47.000 I try to get my rib.

01:09:49.000 It's too bad.

01:09:50.000 No, no, no. 1.00

01:09:50.000 Look at these fucking shots Derek's landing. 1.00

01:09:53.000 Jesus, Roy, is tough. 1.00

01:09:55.000 Because Derek was beating the shit out of him. 0.93

01:10:00.000 This is as good as Derek's ever looked.

01:10:01.000 Like those combinations.

01:10:02.000 He looks more settled. 0.99

01:10:04.000 He's fucking calm. 0.99

01:10:06.000 Look at him, man, I'm telling you. 0.99

01:10:07.000 Calm.

01:10:07.000 We gotta get the fuck out of here.

01:10:10.000 Imagine if he grabs the mic and says, forget it. 0.99

01:10:16.000 Man. 1.00

01:10:20.000 Goddamn. 1.00

01:10:21.000 Yeah, look at him. 1.00

01:10:22.000 He's not even breathing.

01:10:23.000 Well, you know what?

01:10:23.000 Derek has also had quite a few fights in the UFC now, and he's gotten, you know, more and more at home there, more and more comfortable with the experience.

01:10:31.000 Look at that.

01:10:31.000 Nice.

01:10:32.000 Moves right out of the way of that right hand.

01:10:35.000 This is as good as he's ever looked, man.

01:10:37.000 I think he looks great. 0.98

01:10:39.000 Doesn't mean that he can't still get caught because Roy hits fucking hard, and Roy knows how to win. 1.00

01:10:49.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

01:10:54.000 Yeah, it's really weird. 1.00

01:10:55.000 Roy's been lingering for years, bro.

01:10:56.000 He's like a...

01:10:57.000 He don't go away.

01:11:00.000 Roy's a tank. 0.69

01:11:01.000 He really is a tank.

01:11:02.000 And he's a guy who probably should be fighting at 185. How about that?

01:11:06.000 You know, I mean, if he had the kind of discipline that some of these dudes have, like Dos Anjos, that cut way down.

01:11:15.000 But who knows, man?

01:11:16.000 Maybe part of why he's so good is because he's a small man.

01:11:21.000 Fighting as a heavyweight and can take unbelievable punches and kicks and hits really hard, but he's not like a physically big guy.

01:11:31.000 I mean, I guess he is in his weight because he's about 265, but if you got rid of all the body fat on him, how much do you think he'd weigh?

01:11:40.000 230?

01:11:41.000 220?

01:11:43.000 Like, quite honestly, if you put him in the same kind of condition that, say, like, Robbie Lawler's in, get him down to his optimal fighting weight.

01:11:53.000 What does he weigh?

01:11:54.000 210?

01:11:55.000 Yeah.

01:11:55.000 Look, he's got lats.

01:11:56.000 Oh, he's a tank.

01:11:57.000 He's got lats, he's got traps.

01:12:00.000 So, it's just the stomach. 1.00

01:12:02.000 Yeah, well, all that stuff under that stuff is strong as shit. 0.99

01:12:05.000 Yeah, look at the legs. 0.99

01:12:06.000 Now, remember, when he loses that weight, those legs are going to be fucking savages because they've been holding up a house for the last fucking ten years. 0.99

01:12:15.000 So, yeah, he's halfway there. 0.98

01:12:19.000 If he just went on a diet...

01:12:20.000 He's never going to do that, though.

01:12:21.000 That's part of his flair.

01:12:24.000 That's just who he is.

01:12:26.000 I mean, it's amazing.

01:12:27.000 He's a world-class fighter, and he's built like a guy who works at a gas station.

01:12:35.000 No disrespect.

01:12:37.000 Roy knows I'm a big fan.

01:12:40.000 He's a great guy. 0.99

01:12:41.000 He's tough as fuck, too. 1.00

01:12:43.000 Just tough as fuck. 1.00

01:12:44.000 He's one of them Allman Brothers motherfuckers, you know? 1.00

01:12:47.000 He's one of them Allman Brothers fighters. 1.00

01:12:49.000 They'll fucking come all night. 0.99

01:12:50.000 They'll brush over the bottle of Jack. 1.00

01:12:52.000 You bust their lip, they just put Jack on it and keep fighting. 1.00

01:12:55.000 Fuck Stitches. 0.99

01:12:57.000 He's had some spectacular knockouts in the UFC too. 0.99

01:13:01.000 We think of the guys he's KO'd.

01:13:03.000 Mitrione, Czech Congo.

01:13:05.000 He KO'd Czech Congo, right? 1.00

01:13:07.000 Yeah.

01:13:08.000 Did he?

01:13:08.000 I want to say he did.

01:13:12.000 I know Frank Mir caught Congo and then put him away with a choke.

01:13:16.000 Am I confusing the two?

01:13:19.000 Oh, side control. 1.00

01:13:20.000 Oh shit, side control. 1.00

01:13:21.000 Not good for Derek. 1.00

01:13:23.000 He's unleashing those beers.

01:13:26.000 He did beat him?

01:13:27.000 Knocked him out?

01:13:28.000 Yeah.

01:13:29.000 This is terrible because this is two minutes to go in the round and Derek is not moving that much, which means Derek is probably starting to fade.

01:13:38.000 He blew his gas tank trying to put Roy away, I think.

01:13:42.000 We're seeing the same strategy play out That we saw with Joban and with Derek Lewis.

01:13:48.000 Went for it.

01:13:49.000 Sprinted.

01:13:50.000 Emptied that tank.

01:13:52.000 And worst situation for sure though for Lewis, man.

01:13:55.000 To be on the bottom. 1.00

01:13:56.000 Roy gets that fucking... 1.00

01:13:58.000 That mounted crucifix all the time. 1.00

01:14:01.000 That's what he's looking for. 0.97

01:14:02.000 He's going to punch Derek in the face until Derek gives him that right arm. 1.00

01:14:06.000 He's going to take that right arm, shove it in between his two legs. 0.98

01:14:08.000 And once he gets that arm in between his two legs, once he feels like he can open it, he's like trying to bait Derek.

01:14:13.000 Oh, okay.

01:14:14.000 Now he's got his back.

01:14:22.000 Wow, Derek. 0.99

01:14:23.000 Yeah, Derek ain't fucking around. 0.99

01:14:25.000 He ain't fucking around. 0.98

01:14:26.000 Back up to his feet. 0.99

01:14:26.000 That's strong. 0.99

01:14:27.000 That was a strong move.

01:14:31.000 That's impressive because Roy, bam, takes him right back down.

01:14:35.000 Roy's ground game is tight, but Roy doesn't like to take that back.

01:14:38.000 That's weird.

01:14:39.000 Bro, it's tough to take them back when you're a chubby dude.

01:14:41.000 That's what it is, right?

01:14:43.000 Yeah, it's tough.

01:14:43.000 Oh, he doesn't take people's backs because of his gut.

01:14:45.000 If you got him from a turtle, it works, and you lay on him and you pull him back, but nah, it's tough, man.

01:14:51.000 I guess it's sort of a fulcrum point, right? 0.98

01:14:53.000 Oh, shit, he took a hard elbow to the head by Derek in attempting that takedown. 0.99

01:14:58.000 Now he's back. 0.99

01:15:00.000 Interesting.

01:15:00.000 Okay, back to side control.

01:15:01.000 That's his shit. 1.00

01:15:02.000 That's his shit for MMA. He likes this. 1.00

01:15:05.000 This is how he stopped Kimbo Slice on the Ultimate Fighter. 1.00

01:15:07.000 He's gonna pin that fucking right arm in between his two legs. 1.00

01:15:11.000 He just doesn't want to lose the position again because he doesn't have much time here. 0.99

01:15:16.000 So he's probably just gonna try to beat him up from here.

01:15:18.000 He's smothering him with his gut. 1.00

01:15:19.000 I'm telling you, that pizza on the fucking head and garlic chips. 1.00

01:15:23.000 Oh, he hurt him. 1.00

01:15:24.000 Left hook. 0.75

01:15:27.000 Whoa, Jesus Christ.

01:15:28.000 See, he's tired.

01:15:29.000 Yeah, he's tired.

01:15:30.000 That's tough to have that guy.

01:15:31.000 Look at him. 1.00

01:15:31.000 He's like, God damn, that white dude stinks. 1.00

01:15:34.000 God damn, he put his stomach on my goddamn face. 1.00

01:15:37.000 That's when he forced him to move. 1.00

01:15:39.000 He forced him to move when he was gut smothering him.

01:15:41.000 Roy Nelson with the powerful leg kick.

01:15:44.000 I'm just a big fan of Roy Nelson and what he stands for, you know?

01:15:47.000 That's as American as it gets. 0.55

01:15:49.000 No, I love him.

01:15:50.000 I love the beard.

01:15:50.000 Big crazy beard.

01:15:51.000 He's fun. 1.00

01:15:52.000 The tits. 1.00

01:15:52.000 They look like my titties like that. 1.00

01:15:54.000 They're all fucked up to the side. 1.00

01:15:55.000 They sweat. 1.00

01:15:56.000 You get that titty sweat on you with that pretzel stomach sweat. 1.00

01:16:00.000 That shit's deadly, dog. 1.00

01:16:01.000 Pretzel stomach sweat. 1.00

01:16:02.000 You gotta smell my rash guard when I leave it.

01:16:04.000 I definitely don't.

01:16:06.000 I definitely don't.

01:16:08.000 It's time for a bonogram. 0.69

01:16:10.000 What's gonna happen here?

01:16:13.000 Give me a Joey Karate prediction.

01:16:15.000 Third round.

01:16:16.000 Joey Karate prediction.

01:16:19.000 Roy Nelson's getting a little bit of confidence.

01:16:21.000 He might take him down and do exactly what you said. 1.00

01:16:24.000 The fucking tomahawk with the legs. 1.00

01:16:27.000 That mountain crucifix. 1.00

01:16:28.000 If he can get him down.

01:16:30.000 Derek's taking some big deep breaths.

01:16:33.000 This is a high-paced fight.

01:16:36.000 Real high-paced fight.

01:16:37.000 When two guys start getting tired...

01:16:39.000 The guy with the greater wrestling is able to usually impose his wrestling game better than the guy with the pretty decent takedown defense, which is where I'd put Derek Lewis.

01:16:50.000 So they start making mistakes and they get really tired, and a guy with a lot of experience in grappling, like Roy, does a great job of forcing guys into bad positions when he takes them down.

01:17:03.000 So if he could push the pace now, he's got a much better chance at getting Lewis down than he did in the first or second round.

01:17:11.000 Because Lewis has to bargain, like, how much energy do I use to fight off this takedown?

01:17:17.000 He's punching him in the knee, and Derek complained.

01:17:19.000 That's interesting.

01:17:20.000 Look at this.

01:17:20.000 He's punching the inside of his leg.

01:17:25.000 You know, sometimes a guy will let the fight go to the ground because he just can't defend it anymore.

01:17:30.000 And then he wants to take a little break and then try to scramble.

01:17:33.000 But you can't afford to do that in the third round.

01:17:35.000 Especially if it gets any deeper here.

01:17:38.000 You're like four minutes in now.

01:17:40.000 Or four minutes to go.

01:17:42.000 So you know Derek's trying to pummel under. 0.88

01:17:47.000 He's going to fall into that guillotine.

01:17:49.000 Roy just has no fear of his guillotine. 0.56

01:17:55.000 And boom, he's down.

01:17:56.000 There it is.

01:17:56.000 And Roy's going to step over.

01:18:01.000 Okay, so now he's got 3 minutes and 30 seconds to work. 0.99

01:18:04.000 And one of the first things Roy's going to do, Roy doesn't fuck around. 0.97

01:18:07.000 Roy's going to establish a position and then he's going to move to half guard or move to side control. 0.97

01:18:13.000 He's going to establish some way to control his body, like head and arm control.

01:18:18.000 And then he does your standard shin and instep slice, pins down.

01:18:24.000 He's a Henzo Gracie black belt.

01:18:26.000 Is he?

01:18:26.000 Yep.

01:18:27.000 In New York, that guy?

01:18:28.000 Yep.

01:18:29.000 I mean, he trained with a lot of different people, but I'm pretty sure he got his black belt from Henzo.

01:18:34.000 Roy's super legit on the ground.

01:18:36.000 Watch, he's going to slice down.

01:18:39.000 He's just posturing up on him here.

01:18:41.000 He doesn't feel like Derek is moving his hips at all.

01:18:44.000 Derek is like an exploder.

01:18:46.000 He's like a wait for his moment and explode sort of a guy.

01:18:49.000 But he's eating some shots here with Roy on top of him.

01:18:52.000 If Roy can just keep him pinned down here like this with his head at that awkward angle, that's an awkward place to be, man.

01:18:58.000 He doesn't want it anymore, so he's gonna...

01:19:00.000 See?

01:19:00.000 It's like Derek, like, bides his time, waits for his energy levels to restore, and then just hulks his way standing.

01:19:09.000 I mean, for sure he's got technique. 0.99

01:19:11.000 The way he got up, that was all smooth and everything like that, but what I'm saying is, like, he's strong as fuck. 1.00

01:19:20.000 Put this fucking guy resting on you. 1.00

01:19:22.000 It takes its toll, man. 1.00

01:19:23.000 Yeah.

01:19:24.000 No, it does.

01:19:25.000 And Roy, believe me, is making that guy carry all of his weight.

01:19:29.000 Look at how much he's driving into him with his shoulders pinned against him.

01:19:34.000 Makes it harder for him to breathe.

01:19:35.000 He's got real good head control like Roy's.

01:19:38.000 Oh, he's got to be careful of those.

01:19:39.000 There you go.

01:19:40.000 Yeah, he sacrifices a couple of those elbows to get him down.

01:19:46.000 This is not good for Derek.

01:19:47.000 He's definitely losing this round.

01:19:49.000 Back up to his feet again, man.

01:19:51.000 So impressive.

01:19:52.000 That's impressive.

01:19:55.000 Roy is good at holding dudes down, man.

01:19:57.000 It just shows you how tough Lewis is and how strong he is.

01:20:04.000 But he just doesn't have...

01:20:06.000 It doesn't seem like he has the horsepower or the gas tank to sustain...

01:20:12.000 He can't get away from him.

01:20:13.000 He manages to get back up to his feet, but then he can't get away from him.

01:20:16.000 Here we go.

01:20:17.000 Here we go.

01:20:17.000 Big John McCarthy steps in for the fans.

01:20:20.000 Let's do this shit now. 0.99

01:20:22.000 This is UFC 200 weekend, baby. 1.00

01:20:24.000 Let's do this shit! 1.00

01:20:26.000 Roy just took a big-ass deep breath. 1.00

01:20:33.000 Wow, he's gonna kick him. 0.97

01:20:35.000 He's telegraphing that left kick.

01:20:39.000 Derrick was giving that one away.

01:20:46.000 The best guys.

01:20:47.000 Let's go. 0.99

01:20:48.000 Oh shit. 1.00

01:20:48.000 Get out of there. 1.00

01:20:49.000 Oh shit. 1.00

01:20:49.000 Get out of there. 1.00

01:20:50.000 Oh Jesus fucking Christ. 1.00

01:20:52.000 Damn. 1.00

01:20:52.000 Oh nice knee to the body. 1.00

01:20:54.000 Ooh.

01:20:55.000 The clinch again.

01:20:57.000 And Derek just went, oh man. 0.99

01:20:59.000 God damn it. 1.00

01:21:00.000 This motherfucker's on top of me. 1.00

01:21:03.000 More titty juice. 1.00

01:21:04.000 Getting this titty juice on me. 0.96

01:21:06.000 I can't even get this titty juice off me. 0.93

01:21:08.000 Come on, man.

01:21:08.000 Just bang this out.

01:21:09.000 Smells like motherfucking hot dogs in this motherfucker. 1.00

01:21:11.000 Just wants to bang it out. 1.00

01:21:12.000 20 seconds to go.

01:21:14.000 20 seconds to go.

01:21:15.000 Does he get free?

01:21:16.000 Yes, he does.

01:21:17.000 Yes, he does. 1.00

01:21:18.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

01:21:19.000 Left hand. 1.00

01:21:20.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

01:21:22.000 Goddamn Derrick Lewis. 1.00

01:21:24.000 Woo! 1.00

01:21:24.000 But he don't give a fuck. 1.00

01:21:26.000 This fucking guy. 1.00

01:21:27.000 Oh! 1.00

01:21:27.000 Oh, Jesus Christ. 1.00

01:21:28.000 Oh! 0.60

01:21:29.000 A tooth just went out of sight.

01:21:30.000 Oh, he's hurt.

01:21:30.000 He's hurt.

01:21:33.000 Oh, my goodness.

01:21:35.000 Look at him.

01:21:36.000 Look at him.

01:21:36.000 Oh, my goodness.

01:21:37.000 That's white brilliance right there.

01:21:39.000 Did he just lose a tooth?

01:21:40.000 He lost something.

01:21:41.000 Mouth, pee, something.

01:21:42.000 Teeth. 1.00

01:21:43.000 He don't give a fuck, Jack. 1.00

01:21:45.000 Dude, he got cracked. 1.00

01:21:48.000 Oh.

01:21:51.000 Thank you so much.

01:21:55.000 Here it is.

01:21:56.000 Here's a right hand.

01:21:57.000 Boom! 0.99

01:21:58.000 Oh, that was slobber.

01:21:59.000 That's a slobber knocker.

01:22:00.000 That's officially a slobber knocker. 1.00

01:22:02.000 Damn, Roy Nelson has a chin of the gods. 1.00

01:22:07.000 Look at his chin. 1.00

01:22:07.000 His chin is insane. 1.00

01:22:09.000 His ability to absorb punishment is just superhuman.

01:22:13.000 He's just giving the fight just for taking that punch and standing.

01:22:16.000 That just goes to show you how hard Mark Hunt hits.

01:22:19.000 Mark Hunt knocked him out.

01:22:20.000 He KO'd him with an uppercut and walked away. 1.00

01:22:24.000 That just shows you what a bad motherfucker Mark Hunt is. 0.99

01:22:29.000 Roy Nelson, man, takes a shot as good as any human being that's ever lived. 0.99

01:22:33.000 And for as long as he's been doing it. 0.99

01:22:35.000 I mean, he's been taking shots for a long fucking time and still has an iron jaw. 0.97

01:22:41.000 I mean, that was a perfect punch from a knockout artist that landed right on the tip of his chin, snapped his head back, and the dude survived. 0.99

01:22:52.000 It's a tank.

01:22:56.000 Who won that fight?

01:22:57.000 Roy.

01:22:58.000 Takedowns right?

01:23:00.000 Yeah.

01:23:03.000 But if you look at it like who was closer to finishing the fight, it was the one round with Derek and then the third round with Derek.

01:23:12.000 Those exchanges were way more dangerous for Roy than anything that Roy did to him on the ground.

01:23:17.000 Because Roy never really established any good position for a long period of time.

01:23:22.000 He got the mount, but it was at the end of the round.

01:23:23.000 He got side control, and he was trying to get the mount and crucifix, and Derek kept getting up.

01:23:28.000 There wasn't a whole lot done on the ground other than some...

01:23:32.000 You know, decent ground and pound.

01:23:38.000 Ooh.

01:23:39.000 Split decision, ladies and gentlemen.

01:23:40.000 First judge scores it for Lewis.

01:23:43.000 Second for Nelson.

01:23:50.000 Derek Lewis!

01:23:52.000 See?

01:23:53.000 Judges are starting to look at takedowns as being less important than damage done.

01:24:01.000 And if you want to go by damage done, you got the first round, a lot of damage done.

01:24:07.000 A lot of damage done by Lewis.

01:24:08.000 You got the second round, a lot of takedowns, right?

01:24:12.000 How many times did Roy take him down?

01:24:14.000 Three.

01:24:15.000 And then the third round, takedowns, but Derek hit him with some hard shots and had him in trouble.

01:24:23.000 Either way, man, what a fight.

01:24:25.000 See, this is one of the reasons why I hate, um, like, those, uh, the win and loss money.

01:24:32.000 Boom! 0.99

01:24:33.000 Look at this.

01:24:33.000 Here it comes.

01:24:34.000 CRANK! Jesus Christ. 0.91

01:24:35.000 Who takes that shot? 1.00

01:24:37.000 Who fucking takes that shot? 1.00

01:24:38.000 What human being takes that shot? 1.00

01:24:40.000 That is insane. 1.00

01:24:42.000 Roy Nelson's jaw is fucking insane. 1.00

01:24:45.000 You would have to fly in specialists if he punched me like that. 1.00

01:24:51.000 Roy's going to go out dancing tonight, probably pick up some chewing tobacco on the way home.

01:25:00.000 Unbelievable.

01:25:02.000 But anyway, what I was going to say is, sometimes I get bummed out that someone makes less money than that.

01:25:10.000 And a split decision, especially, I feel like split decision...

01:25:16.000 So many times, I don't agree.

01:25:18.000 So many times.

01:25:19.000 And the difference between like three people, three people's opinions, so it's really only two people's opinions against it, and that's going to cost you half of your money?

01:25:30.000 That seems so crazy.

01:25:32.000 That seems like that's something that shouldn't...

01:25:34.000 I feel like maybe there should be like different kinds of whim bonuses, or at the very least they should share something if it's like a split decision.

01:25:44.000 You know, I know the UFC privately bonuses a lot of people, but that's not even what I'm talking about.

01:25:49.000 I'm just talking about just the idea of a win.

01:25:52.000 I mean, everybody's trying to win, you know?

01:25:55.000 How much when they go to the show, they know they're getting a certain amount, right?

01:26:00.000 It's a private company.

01:26:01.000 First of all, obviously I work for them and I can't divulge things that I know that I'm not supposed to talk about, but it's a private company and they prefer to pay people non-publicly with a lot of the stuff they do.

01:26:15.000 I can't say much more than that because it's not my place, you know?

01:26:20.000 I'm obviously not a money person. 0.95

01:26:22.000 I don't pay attention to how the business side of shit of this especially works. 0.98

01:26:27.000 There's lots of different sports so that players will get fucked out of a contract. 0.99

01:26:30.000 Like, I've known baseball players have... 0.92

01:26:33.000 Maybe their team wasn't going to make the playoffs, but that player's really good and he has performance bonuses built into his contract and at the end of the year, he needs to pitch one more inning or even one more out and they'll take him out of the game so they don't have to pay him a million dollars or some shit like that.

01:26:47.000 When players also feel like that guy deserves it because he worked all year for it.

01:26:50.000 He did everything he was supposed to do.

01:26:52.000 Right.

01:26:52.000 And so the owner just says, ah, I'm not going to pay that money today.

01:26:56.000 Sorry. 0.99

01:26:57.000 Yeah, that's fucked. 0.98

01:26:58.000 But I guess that's like we're talking about performance bonus money where baseball teams, Jamie was saying, will take a guy out if he needs to pitch like one more inning and he gets like a million dollar bonus. 0.99

01:27:10.000 They just bench him.

01:27:12.000 They just won't let him play so that they don't have to pay him that bonus, which totally makes sense.

01:27:16.000 I mean, especially if they're winning.

01:27:17.000 If they're ahead, they don't need him.

01:27:19.000 I mean, it all depends on, like, how...

01:27:20.000 It's happened in losing situations, too, though.

01:27:22.000 They're just playing the thing out for fans to watch a game, and they're just...

01:27:25.000 And people, sometimes, they even know the situation.

01:27:27.000 Like, this guy's going to make 500 Gs if he gets three hits today.

01:27:31.000 And they're like, oh, he got two, and he's not going to play for the next four innings.

01:27:35.000 You know what's crazy, Jamie? 0.99

01:27:37.000 The night before 9-11, I was at the fucking comedy store. 0.98

01:27:41.000 And Paul Mooney was on stage talking about Barry Bonds. 0.99

01:27:46.000 He was talking about how Barry Bonds, they weren't going to let that white boy break the record. 0.89

01:27:50.000 Remember, he was going up against a steroid guy. 1.00

01:27:53.000 I'll never forget, he kept saying that shit on stage. 1.00

01:27:57.000 They're never going to let that poor little black boy break that record and all this stuff. 0.99

01:28:00.000 The next day, I woke up to the planes hitting, and I'll never forget saying to myself, Jesus Christ, he was right! 0.96

01:28:07.000 Yeah! 0.99

01:28:07.000 They're never going to let that Barry Bonds win the fucking batting title. 0.99

01:28:11.000 That's how much they went out of their fucking way for him not to... 0.99

01:28:15.000 Jamie, crank this up so I can hear what they're saying about Mark Hunt. 0.97

01:28:19.000 I'm so happy that Mark Hunt is the guy fighting Brock Lesnar.

01:28:23.000 ...to ever compete in the heavyweight division.

01:28:25.000 Mark Hunt is a top ten heavyweight contender, a guy who has beaten some of the best fighters in the world, and a guy who has absolutely legitimate one-punch knockout power. 0.97

01:28:37.000 He just fucking smokes people, man. 0.99

01:28:39.000 Mark Hunt just smokes people. 1.00

01:28:55.000 Holy shit, I'm excited about this. 0.99

01:28:58.000 I was more excited about Daniel Cormier and Jon Jones... 1.00

01:29:04.000 I was never excited about this fucking fight. 0.99

01:29:07.000 This fight? 0.99

01:29:07.000 Mark Hunt and Brock Lesnar? 0.99

01:29:08.000 I don't give a fuck. 1.00

01:29:09.000 Ooh, I can't. 1.00

01:29:09.000 I hope Mark Hunt picks him up and throws his head out of the fucking ring. 1.00

01:29:13.000 That's what I give a fuck about. 1.00

01:29:15.000 Mark Hunt is pissed off, too. 1.00

01:29:17.000 He's fucking pissed off. 0.99

01:29:18.000 He's pissed off right now. 1.00

01:29:20.000 Yeah, he should be. 0.99

01:29:20.000 Let's see where the fuck this goes. 0.99

01:29:22.000 This is going to be a good fight. 0.99

01:29:24.000 Yeah, man.

01:29:25.000 I'm interested.

01:29:27.000 They got me.

01:29:28.000 I'm interested.

01:29:29.000 And the very few guys could be coming from pro wrestling...

01:29:34.000 You know, and having used to have fought in MMA and come back and get you excited like this guy.

01:29:41.000 I mean, he's a legit freak of the freaks. 1.00

01:29:44.000 I mean, look at the size of that motherfucker, dude. 1.00

01:29:48.000 Look at that. 1.00

01:29:49.000 Boom! 0.99

01:29:53.000 That was the fight we were talking about.

01:29:55.000 Yeah, it was Shane Carwin.

01:29:55.000 Look at how he beats the fuck out of Frank Mir here.

01:29:58.000 I mean, just smashed him. 0.98

01:30:03.000 He's a big boy.

01:30:05.000 That is the biggest you're ever going to see.

01:30:08.000 As far as legit super athletes in MMA that fight at 265 pounds.

01:30:14.000 Maybe some people don't know that.

01:30:17.000 For the heavyweight division, it's not unlimited weight.

01:30:20.000 Heavyweight division has a weight limit.

01:30:22.000 That limit is 265 pounds.

01:30:24.000 Everything above 265 pounds is super heavyweight.

01:30:28.000 And we don't have a super heavyweight division in the UFC. So if you're like a super giant guy like the Mountain, that Game of Thrones demon dude, that guy could not fight in the UFC. Can't make the weight.

01:30:40.000 That guy's way over 300 pounds, right?

01:30:42.000 He's enormous.

01:30:45.000 So if they ever wanted to do that super freak division, like they would have to open it up and then they would have to start having fights in there.

01:30:53.000 But I just don't know if there's enough 265 pound plus elite MMA athletes. 0.97

01:30:58.000 There would all be a bunch of fucking ex-linemen. 0.98

01:31:02.000 That would be a bunch of ex-linemen that walk around at 275. Let me ask you this. 0.99

01:31:08.000 The ex-linemen who are...

01:31:10.000 You know a lot about football. 0.98

01:31:11.000 So if a guy's like a fucking world-class lineman, some beast of a man, what would that guy have to... 0.97

01:31:18.000 How much would he have to lose to compete as an MMA fighter? 0.99

01:31:22.000 20 pounds, maybe.

01:31:23.000 That's it?

01:31:24.000 If they're a lineman that's walking around at 295, he's got a tremendous footwork if he's an offensive line or a defensive lineman.

01:31:32.000 So half my work is done. 0.99

01:31:33.000 He's got strong fucking feet. 0.99

01:31:35.000 We gotta work on his striking. 0.99

01:31:37.000 His takedowns are...

01:31:39.000 Once you break the takedown to them...

01:31:44.000 So football, Chael Sonnen had beautiful takedowns.

01:31:48.000 Beautiful football style takedowns.

01:31:50.000 You went four feet.

01:31:51.000 Well, Chael Sonnen was an elite athlete.

01:31:52.000 Chael Sonnen had a beautiful takedown.

01:31:53.000 Very, very high level wrestler. 0.98

01:31:54.000 If you could teach somebody who's six foot six, 285 to take a motherfucker down like Chael. 0.99

01:32:02.000 Don't die. 1.00

01:32:03.000 Get done.

01:32:03.000 What's going on over here?

01:32:05.000 The eighth star of death gets stuck.

01:32:08.000 Who's this Bjorn...

01:32:10.000 Oh, this is the mountain guy.

01:32:12.000 Bjornsson.

01:32:13.000 How do you say that?

01:32:15.000 Bjornsson.

01:32:16.000 Bjornsson.

01:32:16.000 B-J-O-R-N-S-S-O-N. Bjornsson.

01:32:21.000 Six foot nine.

01:32:22.000 It weighs 403 pounds.

01:32:24.000 Jesus Christ.

01:32:27.000 After injuring his knee in basketball, he started competing in strongman competition.

01:32:31.000 He won Iceland's strongest man competition.

01:32:33.000 He came out sixth in the 2011 World Strongest Man contest. 0.99

01:32:38.000 Holy shit, dude. 0.99

01:32:40.000 Wow. 1.00

01:32:41.000 That's a giant, giant dude. 1.00

01:32:44.000 Fucking A, man. 0.99

01:32:47.000 He bench presses 500 pounds and he weighs 400 pounds. 1.00

01:32:53.000 Somehow I think he's a pussy. 1.00

01:32:56.000 That's all you can do, bitch. 1.00

01:32:57.000 How much you bench, bro? 1.00

01:32:58.000 I saw an NFL lineman talking about he could bench 600 pounds. 0.99

01:33:01.000 He was talking shit to the guys in the room with him like, you ain't big like me. 1.00

01:33:05.000 You ain't got shit on me. 1.00

01:33:08.000 Mark Bell, you know the dude who's been on our podcast before and his brother Chris from Bigger, Stronger, Faster. 0.99

01:33:14.000 He just had some shit on his Instagram the other day where he's benching way over 500 pounds. 0.99

01:33:19.000 He's fucking gorilla strong. 1.00

01:33:22.000 That guy is huge. 1.00

01:33:25.000 Fucking huge. 1.00

01:33:26.000 And that's all he wants to do is just lift heavy shit. 1.00

01:33:29.000 He's got an awesome gym. 0.99

01:33:31.000 Created this product.

01:33:32.000 575, it says.

01:33:33.000 Is that what he's lifting?

01:33:34.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:33:34.000 Watch this shit. 1.00

01:33:35.000 What kind of product did he create? 1.00

01:33:37.000 He's got this thing called the slingshot, and it supports your elbows and your shoulders when you're benching.

01:33:46.000 It's actually a pretty interesting invention. 0.99

01:33:48.000 Look at the size of this motherfucker. 0.99

01:33:50.000 Look at how much weight he's pushing up. 1.00

01:33:51.000 That is insanity.

01:33:53.000 That's a quarter of a ton. 1.00

01:33:56.000 What in the fuck? 0.99

01:33:57.000 Oh, that wasn't him. 1.00

01:33:57.000 That was his friend. 1.00

01:33:58.000 Oh, okay.

01:33:59.000 Well, there's one...

01:34:00.000 Oh, that's Big Steve.

01:34:01.000 Sorry. 0.96

01:34:03.000 Un-fucking-believable. 0.93

01:34:04.000 Yeah, I should know that's not him. 0.96

01:34:05.000 I can't tell.

01:34:06.000 You don't actually see his face until he gets up.

01:34:09.000 And then he all of a sudden marks a ginger.

01:34:13.000 But this video is of him.

01:34:14.000 I know on his Instagram of him lifting ungodly weights.

01:34:19.000 Still, all those big muscles, you've discussed it before.

01:34:22.000 You know, for jiu-jitsu and stuff, the endurance factors go out.

01:34:26.000 Yeah, for sure. 0.97

01:34:27.000 That super heavyweight division, they're going to be huffing and puffing in the third fucking round, especially if they come in there yoked to the gills. 0.98

01:34:34.000 Yeah, I wonder. 0.96

01:34:34.000 You know, I mean, there's very few heavyweights other than Cain Velasquez that can fight like a lighter weight fighter. 0.96

01:34:41.000 You know, Cain, in his prime in particular, had just this unbelievable endurance threshold.

01:34:46.000 He could just put paces on guys they just could not tolerate.

01:34:50.000 And you would watch it.

01:34:51.000 I'd watch it like ringside.

01:34:54.000 And I would try to think, have I ever seen a heavyweight that active that can keep it up for five rounds?

01:35:01.000 No.

01:35:02.000 The answer is no.

01:35:03.000 I've never seen anybody as fit as Kane was in his prime.

01:35:07.000 Like, no one has the kind of endurance that that guy has.

01:35:10.000 He'll be there again this weekend.

01:35:12.000 He'll be in that same condition.

01:35:13.000 He's 100% healthy.

01:35:15.000 I hope so.

01:35:17.000 He had back surgery, man. 0.99

01:35:18.000 You never know what the fuck's going to happen to an athlete after back surgery. 0.98

01:35:21.000 Back surgery is very tricky. 0.98

01:35:23.000 They're pulling pieces of his discs out, you know, because his disc was impeding on his nerves.

01:35:29.000 Impinging, I guess.

01:35:31.000 And then he's also had shoulder surgery.

01:35:33.000 He's had knee surgery.

01:35:34.000 There's a lot going on.

01:35:35.000 I mean, no one's a bigger Cain Velasquez fan than me.

01:35:38.000 I personally think there's only two guys ever that you could put in contention for being the greatest of all time.

01:35:45.000 And that's Kane and Fedor.

01:35:46.000 Those are the only two.

01:35:47.000 Well, as far as heavyweights, those are the two...

01:35:50.000 Well, I guess you've got to argue for Doom.

01:35:53.000 Well, sort of, but...

01:35:56.000 Alistair, certainly a combat sports athlete.

01:35:59.000 I mean, he's one of the most decorated ever.

01:36:00.000 He won the K-1 Grand Prix, and he won Strikeforce and Dream.

01:36:04.000 So he was a heavyweight champion of three different organizations.

01:36:06.000 Just never could win, never has won, or even had a shot until this next upcoming fight.

01:36:12.000 Anderson Silva to fight Daniel Cormier at UFC 200. Is that true?

01:36:19.000 That's true.

01:36:20.000 TMZ Sports has confirmed.

01:36:21.000 He was bullshitting this afternoon Anderson Silva.

01:36:23.000 He put a flyer out with UFC 200 on this afternoon.

01:36:27.000 That is crazy if he does that.

01:36:29.000 Because let me tell you something.

01:36:31.000 Daniel Cormier is a very strong man.

01:36:35.000 And he's a powerful wrestler.

01:36:37.000 And Daniel Cormier was throwing dudes around at heavyweight.

01:36:41.000 And sometimes people forget what he did to Rumble Johnson. 0.96

01:36:45.000 Rumble Johnson hits as hard as any fucking light heavyweight he's ever walked the face of the planet. 0.96

01:36:51.000 He cracked Cormier on the button. 0.98

01:36:53.000 Cormier goes down, gets back up, weathers the storm, and starts ragdolling him.

01:36:58.000 Starts breaking him, takes him down, strangles him. 0.56

01:37:01.000 Just broke him and strangled him.

01:37:03.000 And Rumble's way bigger than Anderson.

01:37:06.000 You know?

01:37:07.000 And this is 40-year-old Anderson.

01:37:09.000 This is a very interesting fight that Anderson would want that. 0.93

01:37:16.000 Because if it was like the Anderson that just knocked out Forrest Griffin, I'd be like, oh shit, yeah, let's see that. 0.84

01:37:23.000 You know?

01:37:24.000 Because Anderson's two fights at light heavyweight, or three, Stephen Bonner was at light heavyweight too, right?

01:37:29.000 Wasn't it?

01:37:30.000 I want to say it is.

01:37:31.000 I want to say that was a non-title affair.

01:37:34.000 Because I think that was a headliner in Brazil.

01:37:38.000 Find out what weight Anderson was when he fought Stefan Bonner.

01:37:42.000 205. Was it 205?

01:37:44.000 I think so.

01:37:45.000 Well, Bonner fought Jon Jones.

01:37:47.000 Bonner's always been a 205. He fought Jon Jones at 205, fought Forrest at 205. It had to be a 205. I'm just talking about my ass.

01:37:54.000 Bonner has never made 185, so what am I even saying? 0.99

01:37:59.000 What's in the other box?

01:38:01.000 But I'm interested.

01:38:01.000 Is that just a new product that you guys have?

01:38:03.000 No, this is just a lot of weed.

01:38:05.000 Okay.

01:38:06.000 Want some weed?

01:38:07.000 No, no.

01:38:07.000 Want a Panerae, though?

01:38:08.000 No, no.

01:38:09.000 How you feeling after those three things?

01:38:11.000 You know me, this is like an appetizer for Uncle Joey. 0.99

01:38:14.000 This is like going to fucking Ruth Chris with you and getting the clams. 0.99

01:38:16.000 I don't know how you do it. 0.99

01:38:18.000 I built it.

01:38:19.000 I work it.

01:38:19.000 I've been training.

01:38:20.000 I've been taking this breath spray recently.

01:38:23.000 How good is it?

01:38:24.000 How many milligrams?

01:38:25.000 It gets me so paranoid.

01:38:26.000 Does it?

01:38:26.000 There's something about the breath spray that just hits you with this burst of paranoia.

01:38:32.000 It's not the breath spray.

01:38:33.000 It's edibles. 1.00

01:38:35.000 Edibles fuck with you, man. 1.00

01:38:36.000 It's really potent edibles. 1.00

01:38:38.000 You start feeling...

01:38:39.000 There's a point on a plane where I get really good on an edible, but there's a point on a plane where my legs can't stop moving. 0.98

01:38:45.000 And that's the fucking worst. 0.90

01:38:47.000 That happens over a certain altitude with edibles. 0.99

01:38:49.000 My legs can't stop.

01:38:50.000 I got that crazy leg syndrome. 0.98

01:38:52.000 So with edibles, you can't fucking judge nothing. 0.97

01:38:55.000 These, at least I know, I take four or five of these, I see the devil, and I fall asleep early. 0.98

01:39:01.000 That's it. 0.99

01:39:01.000 I fall asleep, I get up at four fucking cottonmouth, thirsty... 0.99

01:39:06.000 Don't you feel like those meet the devil moments are actually good for you? 0.92

01:39:10.000 Because even though you get all fucking crazy paranoid and weirded out and you feel vulnerable and strange, when it's over you appreciate life more.

01:39:20.000 It's almost like camping out in the forest for a few days and not having air conditioning and coming home and just having a nice cool glass of iced tea.

01:39:26.000 I sizzled after the first show in Philadelphia.

01:39:29.000 Sizzled?

01:39:30.000 As I was getting on stage, the edible hit me with a punch to the stomach.

01:39:36.000 That I thought I had to sit on.

01:39:38.000 When I walked out on stage, it was surreal.

01:39:41.000 And it kicked into the next level when I walked out.

01:39:44.000 Once the adrenaline met the THC, then I just ran with it, and it walked out, and it ended up perfect. 1.00

01:39:51.000 But Jesus Christ, you never know what you're putting in your body with those fucking things. 0.99

01:39:56.000 You never know. 1.00

01:39:56.000 You never fucking know. 1.00

01:39:57.000 Well, especially from new sources. 0.98

01:40:00.000 Did you see what I brought you, Jamie, from old school?

01:40:03.000 I brought you old school, Jamie, because that's how I roll.

01:40:06.000 What do you got?

01:40:09.000 Joey Diaz, when are you going to commit to a fanny pack?

01:40:11.000 I got it.

01:40:12.000 This is it.

01:40:13.000 This is Datsura?

01:40:14.000 This is it, brother.

01:40:15.000 Datsusara?

01:40:15.000 My man Chris sent me the fanny pack.

01:40:17.000 Oh, nice.

01:40:18.000 I got everything.

01:40:19.000 I got this reefer.

01:40:20.000 Joey Diaz has a fanny pack, ladies and gentlemen.

01:40:22.000 I got that reefer.

01:40:22.000 When are you going to get a fanny pack?

01:40:23.000 I got the thing. 1.00

01:40:24.000 I got the fucking lighter. 1.00

01:40:26.000 I got the fucking... 1.00

01:40:27.000 Look, I even got Quaaludes. 1.00

01:40:28.000 Check it out.

01:40:29.000 I got one Quaalude left. 1.00

01:40:30.000 A Cosby Quaalude, a Gorilla Biscuit and shit. 0.99

01:40:32.000 That is a big fanny pack. 1.00

01:40:34.000 Yeah, this is the real deal.

01:40:35.000 Is that the big one?

01:40:37.000 He's had more than one size, right?

01:40:39.000 No, this is it, I think.

01:40:41.000 Is this the one he sells as the Joe Rogan Utility Pack or something like that?

01:40:44.000 I think so.

01:40:46.000 And this is hemp made, too, right?

01:40:48.000 Yeah.

01:40:48.000 It's all hemp and everything.

01:40:49.000 Everything he makes is hemp.

01:40:50.000 He makes geese.

01:40:50.000 He makes really good geese, man.

01:40:52.000 This is the shit to fly with. 1.00

01:40:53.000 Oh, yeah. 1.00

01:40:54.000 This is how I fly this everything.

01:40:56.000 That's it.

01:40:56.000 Yeah, it's easy.

01:40:57.000 And when you get off, you put it, you tuck it, you still keep your wallet in your front pocket, because those fucking, you know, those people fucking... 1.00

01:41:03.000 People. 1.00

01:41:03.000 Those people. 1.00

01:41:04.000 But, no, this is tremendous.

01:41:07.000 You got your keys, you got your rolling paper.

01:41:08.000 Chris is a good dude, too, man.

01:41:09.000 He's got a real good company.

01:41:10.000 He's coming next week.

01:41:11.000 Is he?

01:41:11.000 He's coming next week, but we're going to be in...

01:41:13.000 Oh, he's...

01:41:13.000 Yeah!

01:41:14.000 He's Friday night he's at the Ice House.

01:41:16.000 Okay, he's coming in for EBI. Oh, okay.

01:41:19.000 Are you at the Ice House next Friday night?

01:41:21.000 No, I'm not there for that, no.

01:41:24.000 So, here goes Dos Anjos about to get on stage.

01:41:28.000 Step into the octagon, looking shredded.

01:41:32.000 What do you think about this fight, Joey Diaz?

01:41:33.000 I know you've been wanting this fight for a long time.

01:41:36.000 You're an Alvarez fan, right?

01:41:38.000 No, no, no.

01:41:39.000 I think this is a real barn burner of a fight.

01:41:41.000 I think so, too. 0.98

01:41:42.000 I think this is heart against fucking tremendous skill. 0.98

01:41:45.000 I mean, this guy's got, like, he's a great decorated jiu-jitsu guy. 0.98

01:41:49.000 He's got, like, 19 stripes on his black belt. 1.00

01:41:51.000 This is the real deal, this fucking guy. 0.99

01:41:53.000 Yeah, Dos Anjos has a very good jiu-jitsu game, but he's also, his striking is, I mean, what he did to Cowboy Cerrone showed that his striking is fucking spooky as shit, too. 0.99

01:42:02.000 And what he did to Pettis was even scarier. 0.72

01:42:04.000 What he is, more than anything, man, is super serious and super focused.

01:42:10.000 That is a focused man.

01:42:12.000 So who's number one in this division?

01:42:14.000 Him, 100%.

01:42:15.000 No, no, no.

01:42:16.000 He's the champion.

01:42:18.000 Khabib Nurmagomedov is definitely the number one contender.

01:42:20.000 And the biggest threat to him, because Nurmagomedov beat him, and he beat him pretty handily just a couple years ago. 0.93

01:42:29.000 And then Nurmagomedov had a series of injuries, had surgery on his knee, hurt it again, had a lot of shit happen. 0.68

01:42:37.000 He's still AKA? Yep, still AKA. Habib Nurmagomedov is a fucking nightmare. 0.98

01:42:44.000 Nightmare inside the octagon. 1.00

01:42:46.000 His grappling is so high level, man.

01:42:49.000 You see, and he's so ferocious in his approaches. 0.98

01:42:52.000 It's not, I mean, it's just, it's, he assaults you fast and hard, and when he gets a hold of you in a clinch, man, he's doing a lot of crazy shit. 0.93

01:42:59.000 He's tripping you, he's, he'll throw guys, he takes guys down with doubles, his grip is insane. 0.75

01:43:06.000 Like, he clamps a hold of guys, and you see when he's clamping a hold of them, they're like, whoa!

01:43:11.000 Like, he's just got this level of squeeze, and And this level of, like, physical strength and the understanding of how to manipulate bodies that's just at a super high level.

01:43:20.000 When he ragdolled Dos Anjos, that's when it really opened my eyes. 0.99

01:43:24.000 I was like, wow!

01:43:25.000 I did not expect that.

01:43:28.000 Like, I expected a good fight.

01:43:29.000 I expected a struggle.

01:43:31.000 But he did the same thing to Nate Diaz. 0.98

01:43:33.000 He beat the fuck out of Nate Diaz, man. 0.95

01:43:35.000 And when you watch the way he did it, you're like, wow! 0.98

01:43:38.000 This guy's a tank.

01:43:40.000 And, you know, again, Nick Kurson, trained athlete, and Kurson is of the belief that strength and conditioning is everything, man.

01:43:47.000 Now, where's Marinovich now?

01:43:49.000 Where's the old man Marinovich?

01:43:50.000 I do not know.

01:43:52.000 I mean, the last I heard of him working with fighters was BJ. He might have worked with other fighters that I don't know about, but he's a guy that I would love to sit down and talk to because he was a genius, man.

01:44:01.000 Super genius.

01:44:02.000 Jamie, where's Todd Marinovich now?

01:44:04.000 He's an artist now.

01:44:06.000 Stopped playing football.

01:44:07.000 There's a 30 for 30 on him, I think, and at the end of updating him.

01:44:10.000 Did they talk about how the guy from the Raiders got him arrested?

01:44:14.000 I don't remember the whole thing. 0.98

01:44:15.000 And put the coke in his sock so he would get the lower draft pick and he could steal them and shit. 0.99

01:44:19.000 Really? 1.00

01:44:20.000 Yeah, Al Davis is the real fucking deal. 0.99

01:44:22.000 I'm surprised Al Davis ain't Trump's running mate. 0.99

01:44:26.000 That's fine. 1.00

01:44:27.000 With the fucking wig, too? 1.00

01:44:28.000 He died a few years ago. 1.00

01:44:29.000 Did he really die?

01:44:29.000 Yeah, that's right.

01:44:30.000 He did die. 1.00

01:44:30.000 What the fuck am I thinking? 1.00

01:44:34.000 Rafael... 1.00

01:44:34.000 Yeah, to fucking draft you, he would do kinky shit. 1.00

01:44:38.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:44:40.000 So, here's the question.

01:44:42.000 Should Bruce Buffer break out the Buffer 360 for UFC 200 when he introduces Brock Lesnar, especially now that Brock Lesnar is in the main event?

01:44:51.000 He's doing something completely different.

01:44:52.000 What's he gonna do?

01:44:53.000 Like, he went to training with a gymnast.

01:44:55.000 You know something?

01:44:55.000 You know me, dog.

01:44:55.000 I know things.

01:44:56.000 What is he doing?

01:44:57.000 What's he doing?

01:44:57.000 I can't say.

01:44:58.000 It's a surprise.

01:44:59.000 Are you serious?

01:45:00.000 Yeah.

01:45:01.000 He's doing like a pink type deal.

01:45:04.000 Oh yeah? 1.00

01:45:04.000 He always comes swinging off the fucking back, like that, like that. 1.00

01:45:07.000 On a cloth. 1.00

01:45:09.000 Dressed up like an angel.

01:45:11.000 Swing down on silks.

01:45:12.000 Yeah.

01:45:12.000 Look at Eddie Alvarez.

01:45:13.000 He's got two black eyes.

01:45:14.000 That's how hard he's been training.

01:45:16.000 He's coming into this fight beat up. 0.98

01:45:20.000 Eddie Alvarez has two black eyes, man.

01:45:22.000 I mean, he wasn't lying about sparring 150 rounds.

01:45:28.000 Very interesting, man, because Alvarez is the type of dude who rises to the occasion.

01:45:32.000 He's got greatness in him, man.

01:45:34.000 I mean, he's had some wins and some losses, nice inside leg kick.

01:45:37.000 But at the end of the day, this dude's a savage.

01:45:40.000 And the most exciting, biggest challenge is where he's going to fight his best.

01:45:44.000 And that's what we're looking at.

01:45:46.000 We're looking at Alvarez in the most dangerous situation he's been in in years.

01:45:52.000 And the most important. 0.99

01:45:54.000 That's where a guy like Eddie Alvarez will fucking come to life. 0.98

01:45:57.000 And that's what makes this exciting. 0.98

01:46:01.000 Dos Anjos has to be aware, man. 0.99

01:46:02.000 Alvarez is no fucking joke. 0.98

01:46:04.000 He's got to mind his P's and Q's as he makes his way in. 0.99

01:46:07.000 The difference is Dos Anjos throws a lot of kicks, man.

01:46:10.000 And Alvarez threw a couple nice inside leg kicks, but that's generally not what he does once he starts brawling.

01:46:17.000 Once he starts brawling, he'll widen his stance and throw bombs, whereas Dos Anjos will stick with the kickboxing game.

01:46:25.000 He'll stick kicking those legs and mixing things up.

01:46:29.000 It's just a matter of whose strategy works the best.

01:46:32.000 But I like that Alvarez came out with those kicks but he hasn't thrown very many since.

01:46:38.000 You know Joe Rogan, what a weird gift to have.

01:46:47.000 Yeah.

01:46:48.000 What a weird choice, you know?

01:46:49.000 Dangerous choice in life, man.

01:46:52.000 Crazy, just unbelievably difficult journey you're on.

01:46:57.000 Especially at this level.

01:46:59.000 I mean, look how good these guys are.

01:47:01.000 Dos Anjos just caught him at the end with that left hand.

01:47:05.000 And fatigue may very well play a factor in this fight.

01:47:08.000 Because one of the things, again, about Dos Anjos, not to harp on this, but his conditioning is exceptional.

01:47:13.000 What he did with Pettis in particular...

01:47:17.000 Uh-oh, guillotine.

01:47:19.000 Guillotine.

01:47:20.000 Eddie's in trouble. 1.00

01:47:22.000 This motherfucker's got to squeeze. 1.00

01:47:24.000 Eddie's got to fight those hands off. 1.00

01:47:25.000 He's got to fight those hands off.

01:47:27.000 Oh, nice knee on the break. 0.81

01:47:32.000 When you feel that clamp...

01:47:35.000 Those guys are the really good guillotine.

01:47:37.000 Like, you can see it when they clamp on to dudes.

01:47:40.000 You're like, whoa!

01:47:41.000 Like, um...

01:47:43.000 Hani Yaya, you ever see that guy fight?

01:47:46.000 Hani Yaya is this tiny gentleman.

01:47:49.000 I think he used to fight at 135, now he's 125, right?

01:47:53.000 Isn't Hani at 130?

01:47:54.000 He's either 135 or 125. He's not the biggest guy in the world.

01:47:58.000 Find out what weight he is.

01:47:59.000 I think he's a flyweight now.

01:48:01.000 I might be wrong.

01:48:02.000 But anyway, it doesn't look like a bodybuilder or anything.

01:48:07.000 Oh, Del Sandoz caught him with that left high kick.

01:48:09.000 And that's what I'm talking about.

01:48:11.000 Like, he can add in...

01:48:13.000 Oh, he almost slipped him!

01:48:15.000 Del Sandoz has been in trouble! 1.00

01:48:16.000 Oh, Jesus fucking Christ! 1.00

01:48:18.000 Oh, Jesus fucking Christ! 1.00

01:48:19.000 Oh, Jesus fucking Christ! 1.00

01:48:21.000 Jesus, oh, Jesus fucking Christ! 1.00

01:48:22.000 He's gonna win! 1.00

01:48:23.000 Jesus fucking Christ! 1.00

01:48:25.000 Oh, my God! 1.00

01:48:26.000 Oh, my God!

01:48:27.000 Jesus!

01:48:29.000 This is fucking tremendous. 0.99

01:48:30.000 Look at this. 1.00

01:48:31.000 Oh, he decked him again! 0.99

01:48:32.000 This is Hart against fucking Skill, Joe Rogan. 0.99

01:48:34.000 Oh, fly in me! 1.00

01:48:35.000 Nothing but fucking Hart. 1.00

01:48:36.000 Oh, no. 1.00

01:48:37.000 He went down like this.

01:48:39.000 Oh, Jesus.

01:48:39.000 Side control.

01:48:41.000 Oh, Alvarez's back up.

01:48:42.000 Yeah, but he doesn't know where he is.

01:48:43.000 He doesn't.

01:48:44.000 Alvarez's back up and he takes him down.

01:48:45.000 He doesn't know where he is. 0.99

01:48:47.000 This is Hart against fucking Skill. 1.00

01:48:50.000 I'm telling you, cussuckers. 1.00

01:48:51.000 I've been waiting for this fucking fight for three fucking months. 1.00

01:48:55.000 This is what I'm talking about. 1.00

01:48:56.000 This is what the fucking problem is with UFC. Every once in a while, you run into a brick fucking wall. 1.00

01:49:03.000 This guy, Diaz, these people savages. 1.00

01:49:07.000 Look at this shit. 1.00

01:49:08.000 You gotta kill this motherfucker. 1.00

01:49:10.000 That's it. 1.00

01:49:11.000 It's fucking over. 0.98

01:49:12.000 There's a new 155. Where's Conor McGregor now? 0.99

01:49:17.000 Where's Conor McGregor now? 1.00

01:49:19.000 This kid's Philadelphia, you dumb motherfuckers. 1.00

01:49:23.000 Eddie Alvarez. 1.00

01:49:25.000 This is crazy! 1.00

01:49:26.000 I told you this was the fight of the fucking year, you fucking momos. 1.00

01:49:30.000 Holy shit. 1.00

01:49:30.000 Stop with your bullshit, Brock Lesnar and Mark fucking Hunt. 1.00

01:49:34.000 Holy shit. 1.00

01:49:34.000 That's baby stuff compared to this. 1.00

01:49:37.000 God damn it, Eddie Alvarez. 0.99

01:49:39.000 This is the UFC. Goddamn, Eddie Alvarez. 1.00

01:49:42.000 I told you I was excited when you called me. 1.00

01:49:45.000 This is the fucking fight of the year, cocksuckers! 1.00

01:49:47.000 Holy shit, Eddie Alvarez. 1.00

01:49:50.000 Jesus, I got an anxiety attack. 0.99

01:49:52.000 He looks fantastic. 0.99

01:49:53.000 That's what I'm fucking talking about! 0.99

01:49:55.000 That was spectacular, man. 0.99

01:49:57.000 150 rounds, Joe Rogan! 0.99

01:49:59.000 Fucking spectacular. 0.99

01:50:00.000 Look at this. 0.99

01:50:01.000 Boom! 0.99

01:50:01.000 Look at that right hand landed. 0.99

01:50:03.000 There the legs go. 1.00

01:50:04.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

01:50:06.000 Boom, boom, boom. 1.00

01:50:07.000 Let's do that again.

01:50:09.000 Wham!

01:50:09.000 Oh, he snuck it in right over the guard.

01:50:11.000 Oh, we did the chicken dance.

01:50:13.000 I'll tell you what, Dos Anjos. 0.99

01:50:15.000 He weathered a fucking hell of a storm. 0.99

01:50:18.000 No, nothing for Dos Anjos. 1.00

01:50:19.000 A fucking savage, too. 1.00

01:50:21.000 Conor McGregor, you better pack eight lunches if you want to fuck with these motherfuckers. 1.00

01:50:26.000 These motherfuckers. 1.00

01:50:27.000 I told you, this is the deck five. 1.00

01:50:30.000 Oh my god, Eddie Alvarez.

01:50:32.000 Look at these combinations. 1.00

01:50:33.000 Look at this shit! 1.00

01:50:34.000 Woo! 1.00

01:50:34.000 Are you fucking kidding me, America? 1.00

01:50:37.000 Fuck you and your dumb fights, Mark Hunter. 1.00

01:50:39.000 This is what the fucking fight of the year. 1.00

01:50:41.000 Wow. 0.99

01:50:41.000 This was it, Joe Rogan. 0.99

01:50:42.000 This is boy Mark Henry.

01:50:43.000 That guy is one of the best coaches in MMA today. 0.99

01:50:46.000 A fucking pizza dude from New Jersey. 1.00

01:50:48.000 Suck my dick, you fuck. 1.00

01:50:49.000 With your fucking machines and your bullshit. 1.00

01:50:52.000 A pizza fucking dude. 1.00

01:50:54.000 Suck my dick. 1.00

01:50:55.000 And his other client was Frankie Edgar. 1.00

01:50:57.000 Nothing but heart.

01:50:58.000 They show up with nothing but heart.

01:51:00.000 Yep.

01:51:00.000 And I'm a big fan of Henry's.

01:51:04.000 Big fan. 0.99

01:51:05.000 Fucking tremendous! 0.98

01:51:08.000 Winner by TKO. And new. 0.99

01:51:15.000 150. Are you fucking kidding me? 0.99

01:51:17.000 This just throws a tremendous wrench into everything now. 0.98

01:51:21.000 Well, you know what else it does? 0.99

01:51:22.000 It lets everybody know how fucking goddamn good Michael Chandler is. 0.98

01:51:26.000 And I told you on the phone, Joe Rogan. 0.99

01:51:27.000 He came in, he looked through bots the first fight, Gilbert, the other guy. 1.00

01:51:32.000 This guy's a slow fucking starter. 0.99

01:51:34.000 It's over now. 1.00

01:51:36.000 It's over now.

01:51:37.000 Well, the first fight, a lot of pressure, first of all.

01:51:40.000 You know, first fight in the UFC, his career's on the line, you know, leaves Bellator as a champion.

01:51:46.000 But it shows you how good...

01:51:48.000 Do you see how good Michael Chandler looked in his last fight?

01:51:50.000 These two had wars over in Bellator.

01:51:53.000 Wars.

01:51:54.000 And Chandler just knocked out Pitbull in the first round. 0.99

01:52:01.000 Damn, Eddie Alvarez looked good. 0.99

01:52:03.000 That looked fucking tremendous. 1.00

01:52:04.000 I got an anxiety attack, Joe Rogan. 0.98

01:52:06.000 What we're saying, Eddie Alvarez is the kind of guy that rises to the occasion. 0.99

01:52:11.000 This is the shit that we've forgotten. 0.99

01:52:14.000 You see tattoos on him or a goatee? 1.00

01:52:17.000 Yeah, he's got tattoos.

01:52:18.000 He's got his name tattooed on his back. 1.00

01:52:19.000 He's fucking all heart, this motherfucker. 1.00

01:52:21.000 All fucking heart! 1.00

01:52:22.000 He's an animal, man. 1.00

01:52:24.000 He hits hard, dude. 0.97

01:52:24.000 Look at that. 0.97

01:52:25.000 Boom! 1.00

01:52:25.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

01:52:28.000 Oh shit. 1.00

01:52:30.000 Dos Anjos took some bombs too. 1.00

01:52:32.000 No, Dos Anjos.

01:52:33.000 Oh my god.

01:52:33.000 Anybody else would have went down by now.

01:52:35.000 20 guys would have went down by now. 0.99

01:52:37.000 Fucking Eddie Alvarez. 0.99

01:52:40.000 He's a good dude. 0.99

01:52:44.000 He's just thanking all the people who trained him.

01:52:45.000 Look at this.

01:52:46.000 He's a great guy, man.

01:52:48.000 Good for him.

01:52:49.000 And great for the sport too.

01:52:51.000 Great guy.

01:52:52.000 Great for the sport.

01:52:54.000 Really likable guy.

01:52:56.000 Really marketable guy.

01:52:57.000 Good for him.

01:52:58.000 Good for him, man.

01:53:00.000 You know what?

01:53:01.000 Dos Anjos, he'll be back.

01:53:03.000 Now it sets up some interesting fights.

01:53:04.000 Oh, no, no, no.

01:53:05.000 Now you got Dos Anjos at the right.

01:53:07.000 This throws a monkey wrench into everything.

01:53:10.000 But you ain't beating this kid.

01:53:12.000 You ain't beating this kid for the next two or three fights.

01:53:15.000 Alvarez?

01:53:15.000 Yeah, you ain't beating him.

01:53:16.000 This kid's a fucking Philadelphia guy. 1.00

01:53:18.000 He's been eating pizza for 20 years. 1.00

01:53:19.000 He's done.

01:53:20.000 You're going to give him lobster tail. 0.99

01:53:21.000 You're done. 1.00

01:53:22.000 Lights out, bitch. 1.00

01:53:23.000 Lights out, bitch. 1.00

01:53:25.000 I wonder if Nurmagomedov gets a shot at him next. 1.00

01:53:28.000 I wonder if that's what they set up.

01:53:32.000 You know, it's hard to deny Nurmagomedov his shot.

01:53:36.000 He's undefeated.

01:53:38.000 And he's the number one contender.

01:53:39.000 Look at this Joe Rogan.

01:53:40.000 This is beautiful.

01:53:41.000 What a beautiful right hand.

01:53:42.000 He snuck it in there, man.

01:53:43.000 And he saw him do that chicken dance.

01:53:45.000 That's crazy that he didn't go down, man.

01:53:48.000 No, no, no.

01:53:48.000 And you count the punches he got hit with.

01:53:50.000 Oh, bombs, too. 1.00

01:53:51.000 This is fucking Carlos Condon Jr. He got hit with bombs. 1.00

01:53:54.000 He's just teeing off on them.

01:53:56.000 Herb Dean, best in the business right there.

01:53:59.000 He just looks at it.

01:54:00.000 He's like, yep, I've seen enough.

01:54:01.000 I've seen enough.

01:54:02.000 And I totally agree.

01:54:04.000 Perfect time to stop it.

01:54:06.000 Herb Dean's the best.

01:54:07.000 He really is.

01:54:09.000 Look, you're breathing heavy.

01:54:10.000 Jesus, you okay with that?

01:54:11.000 I was getting anxiety, though.

01:54:13.000 For real?

01:54:14.000 Yeah.

01:54:14.000 Just because you get worked out?

01:54:15.000 I love this shit. 1.00

01:54:16.000 This is my life, bro. 1.00

01:54:17.000 I love...

01:54:17.000 Heart is my business.

01:54:19.000 I sell heart, dog.

01:54:20.000 This is heart.

01:54:21.000 That was heart.

01:54:22.000 That's heart, dog.

01:54:22.000 That's not...

01:54:23.000 What do you think?

01:54:24.000 You hang out with your boys and drink non-gluten. 1.00

01:54:26.000 And eat cheese and shit. 1.00

01:54:28.000 Fuck it. 1.00

01:54:28.000 You know. 1.00

01:54:30.000 Look at this tomorrow, man.

01:54:31.000 Look at the prelims.

01:54:32.000 Just the prelims.

01:54:32.000 Kat Zingano and Juliana Pena, Johnny Hendrix and Kelvin Gastelum, TJ Dillashaw, Rafael Asuncao, and Sage Northcutt and Enrique Merrill.

01:54:41.000 And there ain't a dime on that card, Jamie. 0.97

01:54:43.000 Look at the fucking Johnny Hendrix Gastelum. 0.99

01:54:45.000 What is that? 1.00

01:54:46.000 Is that even money?

01:54:47.000 Yeah.

01:54:48.000 They're all pretty much even.

01:54:49.000 Frankie Edgar's even now.

01:54:51.000 There ain't a dime on this card. 0.98

01:54:53.000 If you're looking to make a dime, you better fucking bet baseball this weekend. 0.97

01:54:57.000 I gotta look at the Friday early card. 0.99

01:54:59.000 Look at this.

01:55:00.000 Look at the main.

01:55:01.000 Oh my goodness.

01:55:02.000 I can't make a dollar on this.

01:55:03.000 I gotta bet Travis Brown as an underdog.

01:55:06.000 Misha Tate is now the main fight.

01:55:09.000 That's the main fight now.

01:55:10.000 That's the headliner fight.

01:55:11.000 Misha Tate and Amanda Nunes.

01:55:13.000 Very interesting.

01:55:14.000 Look at this, Joe Rogan.

01:55:15.000 TJ Dillashaw, minus 410. I can't make a dime.

01:55:19.000 But look at that card.

01:55:21.000 That seems like they decided to have Misha versus Amanda Nunes over Brock Lesnar versus...

01:55:30.000 Is that true?

01:55:31.000 Yeah.

01:55:32.000 Yeah, so they switched that up.

01:55:33.000 Because just before that, we were just looking at it, it was the opposite.

01:55:38.000 Somebody made an executive decision.

01:55:40.000 Well, they look at it and bet it.

01:55:41.000 They saw her with a bikini on.

01:55:42.000 That's probably what it is. 1.00

01:55:43.000 And they said, fuck this shit. 1.00

01:55:44.000 That's probably what it is. 1.00

01:55:45.000 She should beat him in that. 0.95

01:55:46.000 Well, she might be the best one to sell this card.

01:55:49.000 Yeah. 0.97

01:55:50.000 But also, from a hardcore fan standpoint, you gotta go, how the fuck is Aldo and Edgar for the title not... 0.91

01:55:57.000 Even talked about. 0.62

01:55:59.000 I mean, it's an interim title.

01:56:00.000 It is an interim belt, right?

01:56:05.000 I mean, that's what's going on.

01:56:06.000 Yeah, interim featherweight title.

01:56:08.000 But it is for the belt.

01:56:09.000 You know what I mean? 0.98

01:56:10.000 Obviously, Conor McGregor is going to have a hard fucking time making 145 again. 0.95

01:56:16.000 I mean, I guess he could do it, but how much more is he going to do that? 0.96

01:56:20.000 Not after he saw this tonight.

01:56:22.000 Yeah.

01:56:24.000 155 is going to be Hell's Kitchen, though.

01:56:26.000 You don't think he's going to want to fight these guys?

01:56:28.000 Would you?

01:56:29.000 Yeah, Conor wants to fight those guys.

01:56:31.000 That's where all the money is.

01:56:31.000 Let me explain something to you.

01:56:32.000 That kid, not only can he throw punches, but that kid could wrestle, too.

01:56:36.000 Yeah, Alvarez is a very good wrestler.

01:56:38.000 That's how he beat Pettis.

01:56:40.000 It's all over down there.

01:56:41.000 No muss. 1.00

01:56:43.000 He's got to come home now and kill Diaz because what he's turning his back to is the fucking hell's dead. 1.00

01:56:49.000 It's the original room on a Tuesday. 1.00

01:56:51.000 There's six people there.

01:56:53.000 There's six people there. 1.00

01:56:54.000 You got those two savages at 145, and now you got this fucking Philadelphia kid. 1.00

01:57:01.000 You got the Brazilian. 1.00

01:57:02.000 You got the fucking Russian. 1.00

01:57:03.000 Who else is at 155 lingering now? 1.00

01:57:06.000 That Max Holloway kid, right?

01:57:08.000 No, he's 45. Well, those kids, the other kid that you talked about that stayed at 150, Dustin Poirier, whatever.

01:57:16.000 Dustin Poirier, yeah.

01:57:16.000 You got a Hell's Kitchen down there now.

01:57:18.000 Yeah.

01:57:19.000 So the UFC just got...

01:57:21.000 It's a tremendous weight class. 0.99

01:57:23.000 Damn, Alvarez was throwing bombs. 1.00

01:57:24.000 Look at this. 1.00

01:57:25.000 No, no, no, no.

01:57:26.000 I told that being...

01:57:26.000 Did you count these, Jamie?

01:57:29.000 Wait till you count these. 0.99

01:57:30.000 He got hit fucking hard a bunch of times. 0.99

01:57:33.000 Boom, boom, boom. 0.99

01:57:34.000 I mean, full wind-ups.

01:57:36.000 Significant strikes, 57. Fifty-fucking-seven. 0.97

01:57:41.000 He landed 57. Look at that, huh? 0.96

01:57:42.000 Boom! 0.99

01:57:43.000 Oh, and you got Okokui!

01:57:45.000 Look at that, total strikes and significant strikes.

01:57:48.000 All of his strikes were significant.

01:57:51.000 Michael Chiesa is number 10. Look at that murderous row.

01:57:54.000 What were you saying, Jamie?

01:57:56.000 That might not be perfectly updated, but...

01:57:59.000 What, the amount of strikes?

01:58:00.000 Just because they're both the same.

01:58:02.000 Yeah, but that means you just hit them every time hard.

01:58:05.000 Significant strikes and strikes, they could be the same thing.

01:58:08.000 The fight before with Roy Nelson and Lewis, and the stats on screen were different from the stats on here.

01:58:13.000 Oh, okay.

01:58:14.000 All right.

01:58:15.000 That's interesting.

01:58:15.000 That's all I'm saying.

01:58:16.000 Okay.

01:58:17.000 Look at this, Joe Rogan.

01:58:18.000 So it might not be updated?

01:58:19.000 Yeah.

01:58:20.000 They're showing you're right.

01:58:21.000 They already were setting this up.

01:58:23.000 Yeah. 0.71

01:58:23.000 Nurmagomedov is a beast, man. 0.71

01:58:25.000 Well, I mean, he's been the number one contender for a long time, and he's very skillful, man.

01:58:30.000 Very skillful.

01:58:30.000 Very strong.

01:58:32.000 If he can get through camp and be healthy.

01:58:34.000 But that's a significant if, because he's pulled out a couple times now and had some pretty significant injuries.

01:58:42.000 No one's a bigger fan of that dude than me.

01:58:44.000 I think he's one of the biggest puzzles, one of the most difficult puzzles to solve in the division.

01:58:49.000 He was supposed to fight Tony, but they had to postpone that fight.

01:58:58.000 So it would be...

01:58:59.000 I was one of the best fights I've ever seen.

01:59:01.000 Yeah, Tony had to pull out due to an injury, right?

01:59:04.000 Tony had injured.

01:59:04.000 Lung infection or blood flots or something.

01:59:07.000 And that's when that young man who, what was his name, who just fought Nurmagomedov?

01:59:11.000 A young guy who took the fight on real short notice. 0.99

01:59:15.000 And this motherfucker had just gotten like surgery on his elbow like six weeks ago or some crazy shit. 0.99

01:59:22.000 It might have been less than that. 1.00

01:59:24.000 He's nuts. 0.99

01:59:28.000 Darryl Horcher? 1.00

01:59:29.000 Yeah, Darryl Horcher.

01:59:30.000 That guy's a stud.

01:59:32.000 Took that fight against Nurmagomedov.

01:59:33.000 Nobody wanted that fight.

01:59:34.000 Took that fight on short notice and fought well.

01:59:37.000 Fought real well.

01:59:39.000 Especially for a guy who just really didn't have any time to prepare for it.

01:59:43.000 But I think that Nurmagomedov needed that fight too.

01:59:46.000 He needed a fight against a guy that may not, you know, first fight in the UFC. Might not have been...

01:59:53.000 I'm going to sneeze.

01:59:54.000 Excuse me.

01:59:56.000 Might not have been as well prepared.

01:59:58.000 You know, I think that Nurmagomedov probably needed to knock the dust off a little bit.

02:00:03.000 He's out for two years.

02:00:04.000 Two years with injuries, man.

02:00:06.000 That's just crazy. 1.00

02:00:06.000 A lot of shit wrong. 1.00

02:00:09.000 Then the knee got hurt again. 1.00

02:00:10.000 Yep, same knee got hurt twice.

02:00:13.000 Yeah, I think he might have rushed his comeback.

02:00:16.000 Sometimes guys do that.

02:00:17.000 A lot of guys have done that.

02:00:18.000 They hurt their knee, and then in the process of rehabbing it, Ed Shortfuse Herman did that, hurt it, was rehabbing it, started training again, blew it out again.

02:00:30.000 A couple guys have had that happen.

02:00:32.000 I'm still overwhelmed by that fight.

02:00:34.000 I'm still overwhelmed.

02:00:35.000 Incredible.

02:00:36.000 I'm not kidding you.

02:00:36.000 My head can't even wrap my head.

02:00:38.000 I can't believe it.

02:00:39.000 Incredible. 0.99

02:00:39.000 I had a funny fucking feeling, too. 0.99

02:00:41.000 I was like, you know what, man? 0.99

02:00:42.000 This is the battle right here. 0.99

02:00:43.000 This is going to be a great fucking fight. 0.99

02:00:46.000 Yeah. 0.99

02:00:47.000 But, you know... 0.99

02:00:49.000 We weren't in fucking Vegas to bet it, so who gives a fuck, Jamie? 0.99

02:00:52.000 And if we were? 0.99

02:00:54.000 I would have bet it.

02:00:55.000 You would have bet on Eddie? 1.00

02:00:56.000 Yeah, just a yardstick just to watch the fucking fight. 1.00

02:00:59.000 You gotta give the kid the benefit of the doubt. 0.99

02:01:01.000 That's one of the greatest lines in any movie, when the loan shark gives Rocky 500, and he goes, you don't have to pay me back.

02:01:08.000 I think Lady Luck is in your corner. 1.00

02:01:09.000 I kept hearing that all fucking week. 1.00

02:01:11.000 Lady Luck is in that kid's fucking corner, man. 1.00

02:01:13.000 I love all that shit. 1.00

02:01:14.000 That's... 1.00

02:01:16.000 How much of an underdog was he?

02:01:17.000 Not much.

02:01:18.000 Two and a half to one.

02:01:19.000 That's it?

02:01:19.000 That's it.

02:01:20.000 There's no dough.

02:01:21.000 That's amazing.

02:01:22.000 I would have thrown a yardstick just to watch and have a soda and smoke a joint.

02:01:26.000 There's no dough this weekend. 0.99

02:01:28.000 Vegas took such a bath on Nate Diaz that now they've tightened their lines on fucking Vegas. 0.97

02:01:32.000 When Nate Diaz did that, they paid out hundreds of thousands. 1.00

02:01:36.000 And they said, fuck it. 1.00

02:01:37.000 That's it. 1.00

02:01:37.000 No more mistakes with this. 1.00

02:01:38.000 They got Ariel Aguani.

02:01:40.000 They got everybody in on it.

02:01:41.000 They're helping out with the lines now.

02:01:42.000 There's no more mistakes.

02:01:44.000 For a long time, you see weak lines.

02:01:46.000 You know, you want to bet football and make money? 1.00

02:01:48.000 If you lose in September, you're a fucking loser. 1.00

02:01:51.000 If you bet basketball, the first three weeks in November, you're going to win. 1.00

02:01:55.000 The lines are weak.

02:01:56.000 You know, home, the Knicks home on a Tuesday night, they're giving three.

02:01:59.000 Come on. 1.00

02:01:59.000 They're going to run away with, you know, shit like that. 1.00

02:02:02.000 That's common sense shit. 1.00

02:02:03.000 But then they tighten their shit up come December. 1.00

02:02:06.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:02:06.000 Same thing happened. 1.00

02:02:07.000 You know, when I first used to go to UFC years ago, just in my thought, Not even what you would say to me.

02:02:13.000 I would win money.

02:02:14.000 Then the first fight I ever bet was Shawn Shirk against Frankie.

02:02:17.000 I was just sick and tired of going, I could have made money this weekend. 1.00

02:02:20.000 Because the Lions were dog shit. 1.00

02:02:22.000 You would talk to me on the plane about generalities, and I'd watch generalities, and I was a fucking dummy, and I'd put it together. 1.00

02:02:29.000 Can you imagine somebody who knew the game, like somebody who was a fighter? 0.99

02:02:33.000 You could have killed Vegas early.

02:02:35.000 Now, I think after Diaz, whatever, because I always look. 0.99

02:02:38.000 I always look.

02:02:39.000 It's in my blood.

02:02:40.000 I got to look.

02:02:41.000 But after Diaz, there's no more mistakes.

02:02:43.000 And then they used to have a lot of mistakes on the undercards.

02:02:46.000 Because listen, you're going to gamble to make money.

02:02:48.000 If you want to be Houdini, you might as well go get your Pomerate.

02:02:51.000 That's not gambling. 0.99

02:02:53.000 Gambling is to make money and to put your percentages higher to make a fucking living. 0.98

02:02:57.000 So it doesn't matter what I bet. 0.99

02:03:00.000 Well, I had Ronda. 0.96

02:03:01.000 It doesn't really fucking matter if you had Holly Holm. 1.00

02:03:03.000 Because some idiot in Tennessee... 1.00

02:03:06.000 Bet $200,000 on the opening fight that nobody looked at. 1.00

02:03:10.000 Because he knew that the fucking... 0.99

02:03:12.000 There's been some times where we brought in guys where I would look at the line and I'd know who they were. 0.99

02:03:19.000 And I'd know how good they were.

02:03:21.000 And I'd be like, this line's crazy.

02:03:22.000 Yeah, they don't know.

02:03:23.000 There's been a few times.

02:03:24.000 Nobody really knows.

02:03:26.000 But you also have a thing in the UFC called...

02:03:29.000 First-time jitters, the crowd grows, so you don't really know how to judge it.

02:03:34.000 There's some guys you know won't get first-round jitters.

02:03:36.000 There's a certain level of guy that operates at such a professional level that they pretty much always operate at that level.

02:03:44.000 It's weird.

02:03:45.000 You can kind of guess when guys won't get UFC jitters.

02:03:49.000 It's real weird, man.

02:03:50.000 I can't guess.

02:03:51.000 You're that good.

02:03:51.000 I can't.

02:03:52.000 I don't know where they're coming from or what organization.

02:03:54.000 There's only a few guys who haven't gotten it.

02:03:55.000 And I haven't really followed them, so...

02:03:57.000 Aleister didn't get UFC jitters at all.

02:04:01.000 At all.

02:04:02.000 And when he came to the UFC, it was when, you know...

02:04:06.000 Drug testing was a little bit different.

02:04:08.000 That's right.

02:04:10.000 But you watched that Brock fight. 1.00

02:04:11.000 Oh, he fucking, he just kicked him right in the fucking side. 0.99

02:04:14.000 Not only that, that was his first fight in the UFC. So everybody's waiting to see him. 0.99

02:04:18.000 And I've been waiting to see him forever.

02:04:20.000 So, you know, I'm a big kickboxing fan.

02:04:22.000 And he was the K-1 Grand Prix champion.

02:04:24.000 I watched his kickboxing matches with Badr Hari and Gokhan Saki.

02:04:29.000 I mean, he's a world-class kickboxer. 0.99

02:04:31.000 So I was like, if this guy can keep people off him, there's a lot of people that are fucked. 1.00

02:04:35.000 You're going to see some stupid high-level striking. 1.00

02:04:39.000 I mean, his striking is very clean, man. 1.00

02:04:42.000 Real dangerous.

02:04:43.000 Especially when he was jacked.

02:04:44.000 When he was super uber-eam.

02:04:48.000 He's one of those guys, man.

02:04:51.000 When I saw him fight in the UFC, I'm like, this guy's not going to have first-round jitters.

02:04:54.000 He's not going to have first-fight jitters.

02:04:56.000 He's just fought too many times.

02:04:58.000 He's fought in Pride.

02:04:59.000 He's fought in Dreams.

02:05:00.000 He's fought in K1. He was a Strikeforce heavyweight champion.

02:05:03.000 He was a dream heavyweight champion.

02:05:04.000 He's not going to get rattled.

02:05:06.000 That was his first right, Brock?

02:05:08.000 I don't remember that.

02:05:09.000 I mean, he might lose. 1.00

02:05:10.000 He just came in and went for that fucking stomach. 1.00

02:05:12.000 Played that fight. 1.00

02:05:13.000 Kneed him.

02:05:13.000 Pulled that fight up.

02:05:14.000 Kicked him or something.

02:05:15.000 Yeah, find the Brock Lesnar All-Star Overeem fight.

02:05:19.000 I just want to look at Overeem's body real quick.

02:05:24.000 Because when that guy, it's on Fight Pass, right?

02:05:27.000 Yeah, you can find it on Fight Pass, I'm sure.

02:05:30.000 The stream has ended.

02:05:31.000 Thank you for watching. 0.99

02:05:32.000 Goddamn Eddie Alvarez. 0.99

02:05:34.000 Congratulations. 1.00

02:05:35.000 You fucking savage. 1.00

02:05:38.000 Is there a... 1.00

02:05:39.000 You know what we gotta get, dude?

02:05:41.000 We gotta get the new Apple TV. Because this old Apple TV is dog shit compared to the new one. 0.99

02:05:46.000 The new one's badass. 0.99

02:05:47.000 And you really like that watch down on Twitter the other day with Redman?

02:05:50.000 Redman.

02:05:51.000 I wouldn't buy it, but Redman has it.

02:05:52.000 It is dope.

02:05:53.000 How much is it?

02:05:54.000 I don't know.

02:05:54.000 Which one was it?

02:05:56.000 Apple Watch?

02:05:56.000 No, it's USD. Oh.

02:06:00.000 You...

02:06:00.000 Boy.

02:06:01.000 It's after 100. Brock vs.

02:06:05.000 Overeem.

02:06:08.000 I wouldn't say it was more than one.

02:06:10.000 141. There it is.

02:06:12.000 Wow.

02:06:12.000 Yeah.

02:06:13.000 Six foot five, 256 versus six foot three, 265. Let me tell you something.

02:06:19.000 They both weighed 265 because I remember them weighing in.

02:06:24.000 I don't think Alistair weighed a hair under like 260. They're both like the same weight.

02:06:30.000 I think.

02:06:32.000 God, it's hard to remember.

02:06:35.000 Yeah, see?

02:06:36.000 This thing is whack-a-dicious. 0.99

02:06:38.000 The new one, you can kind of...

02:06:40.000 Okay, I'll do it.

02:06:41.000 The new one, you swipe your finger across.

02:06:43.000 You can pick a point.

02:06:44.000 It's got like a swipe pad on it.

02:06:46.000 Just like your keypad on your laptop.

02:06:49.000 Is that kind of thing?

02:06:50.000 The new one's dope.

02:06:51.000 And you can talk into it, Joey Diaz.

02:06:53.000 What?

02:06:54.000 You can talk into your Apple TV remote.

02:06:58.000 And tell it what?

02:06:58.000 Tell it what you want to watch.

02:07:00.000 No shit. 1.00

02:07:01.000 What was that movie that you were in? 1.00

02:07:03.000 The what that saved Christmas?

02:07:05.000 The dog that saved Christmas. 1.00

02:07:07.000 By the way, I told you before, I'll tell you again, my kids love that fucking movie. 1.00

02:07:10.000 Still? 1.00

02:07:10.000 They love it. 1.00

02:07:11.000 They still watch it?

02:07:12.000 They love it.

02:07:12.000 Especially the six-year-old.

02:07:14.000 There's like eight of them. 1.00

02:07:15.000 There's like eight of those fucking movies. 1.00

02:07:17.000 Well, they love that you... 1.00

02:07:18.000 That's Joey!

02:07:19.000 Joey's been over here!

02:07:21.000 They love it.

02:07:22.000 They love seeing you on TV. They laugh.

02:07:24.000 They think it's so funny.

02:07:27.000 Those are fun movies, man.

02:07:28.000 I don't remember what my point was.

02:07:30.000 What was I going to say?

02:07:31.000 You could pull them up with your voice on Apple TV. Oh, so I could say, The Dog to Save Christmas.

02:07:35.000 I'd say it into the remote, and it would find it.

02:07:38.000 Finds it.

02:07:38.000 Just shows up on the screen.

02:07:42.000 And you're like, yep, that's it.

02:07:44.000 You talk to the thing.

02:07:45.000 Yeah, you talk to it.

02:07:47.000 It does searches. 0.99

02:07:49.000 We're living in the goddamn future, Joey Diaz. 0.99

02:07:52.000 So, strange, strange time to be alive. 0.98

02:07:55.000 So we're fast-forwarding this thing until we get to the Brock Lesnar, Alistair Overeem slugfest.

02:08:03.000 So, like, that's a guy that I didn't think was going to...

02:08:07.000 I have a hard time competing in the UFC. Tim Kennedy, that's another one.

02:08:10.000 When he came over to the UFC, I'm like, people have been shooting at him in Afghanistan for years.

02:08:15.000 He's not going to get rattled coming into the UFC. He was fine.

02:08:18.000 Luke Rockhold, same thing.

02:08:19.000 There's like a bunch of guys where you just knew they were going to be fine.

02:08:22.000 Lorenz Larkin, he's another one.

02:08:24.000 Robbie Lawler.

02:08:25.000 When he came back to the UFC, he's not going to get rattled at all.

02:08:29.000 Robbie Lawler is as savage as they come.

02:08:33.000 That dude.

02:08:34.000 There's, like, no purer expression of, like, primal combat than, like, his fights with Johnny Hendrix, the second fight in particular, and his fight with Rory McDonald.

02:08:46.000 Just blood and guts.

02:08:48.000 And his Carlos Condit fight.

02:08:50.000 Both of those guys, just blood and guts. 1.00

02:08:53.000 Like, fuck. 1.00

02:08:55.000 What do we got here? 1.00

02:08:58.000 Let's see where we're at here.

02:08:59.000 231 and 27 seconds in here. 0.97

02:09:06.000 Is our internet still dogshit, Jamie? 0.94

02:09:11.000 Has it gotten any better? 0.99

02:09:14.000 What fight is this?

02:09:16.000 This is a long-ass time ago.

02:09:18.000 It doesn't seem like it is.

02:09:20.000 141, but this is 60 UFCs ago.

02:09:23.000 Almost.

02:09:25.000 Manny Gamburian.

02:09:33.000 I'm gonna move this up a little bit here.

02:09:36.000 So, Joey Diaz, where are you doing your special?

02:09:39.000 Chicago. 1.00

02:09:40.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

02:09:41.000 Rosemont Zanis. 1.00

02:09:42.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

02:09:43.000 Blue collar like a motherfucker. 1.00

02:09:45.000 Like a motherfucker. 1.00

02:09:46.000 After my surgery, I start full-time training. 1.00

02:09:49.000 Only hour sets. 0.99

02:09:52.000 You know, I'm gonna go fucking commando here. 1.00

02:09:54.000 Damn, Joey Diaz. 1.00

02:09:56.000 I gotta go GSP here. 1.00

02:09:57.000 Damn. 1.00

02:09:57.000 I gotta take him back to the roots. 1.00

02:09:59.000 I gotta coach.

02:09:59.000 I got everything.

02:10:00.000 Old school.

02:10:02.000 You got a comedy coach?

02:10:03.000 Yeah.

02:10:03.000 Who's your comedy coach?

02:10:04.000 Red Fox.

02:10:05.000 How's he helping you?

02:10:06.000 I don't know.

02:10:07.000 From the grave?

02:10:07.000 From the grave.

02:10:08.000 Like he talked to Eddie Griffin in the bathroom at the comedy store. 1.00

02:10:12.000 I'm going to summons him to my fucking house with some chickens. 1.00

02:10:16.000 You know what I'm saying? 1.00

02:10:16.000 Something. 1.00

02:10:17.000 Do you remember that?

02:10:18.000 Come on. 1.00

02:10:19.000 I'll never forget that horrible fucking scene. 1.00

02:10:21.000 Even though the movie was... 1.00

02:10:22.000 That movie was ridiculous. 0.94

02:10:24.000 It was hilarious. 0.98

02:10:25.000 I love movies like that. 0.94

02:10:26.000 Foolish ways. 0.90

02:10:27.000 That's my personal roadhouse, brother. 0.95

02:10:30.000 Remember his name was Foolish Ways? 0.97

02:10:31.000 Foolish, yeah.

02:10:33.000 The green light, the red light, it was different. 0.99

02:10:36.000 Whatever, something with the light.

02:10:38.000 Hilarious. 1.00

02:10:38.000 You thought I forgot this shit, did you? 1.00

02:10:41.000 Hilarious. 1.00

02:10:42.000 That was a Master P production.

02:10:45.000 Oh, look at Nate Diaz.

02:10:46.000 He looks like a young boy here.

02:10:47.000 Nate Diaz, winner by unanimous decision.

02:10:49.000 He looks so young.

02:10:51.000 So now Overeem is standing in the cage.

02:10:56.000 This is weird.

02:10:57.000 They're showing Nate Diaz backstage while Overeem is fighting, about to fight Brock Lesnar.

02:11:04.000 I don't understand what's going on here.

02:11:12.000 Oh, okay.

02:11:13.000 The Brock Lesnar fight.

02:11:14.000 I fast-forwarded through it.

02:11:17.000 Whoopsies.

02:11:22.000 So, um, are you self-producing this thing?

02:11:26.000 No, this is New Wave.

02:11:28.000 Uh, who's, which is, uh, what's New Wave?

02:11:31.000 They did all those specials.

02:11:34.000 They did a bunch of specials.

02:11:35.000 They did Tom Segura's.

02:11:38.000 Um, this doesn't make any sense.

02:11:40.000 I feel like the Manny Gamburian fight, they might have showed it afterwards.

02:11:44.000 Doesn't make sense.

02:11:44.000 Oh, yeah, [...

02:11:46.000 Maybe it is.

02:11:47.000 Maybe it is.

02:11:47.000 Yeah, that's what it was.

02:11:49.000 Yeah, it must be.

02:11:50.000 The Manny Gambarian fight must have been a fight that they showed after the main event because the main event happened quick.

02:11:55.000 Because there's two minutes left. 0.99

02:11:55.000 What the fuck? 0.99

02:11:56.000 Yeah, we always do that. 1.00

02:11:57.000 Which is actually kind of cool.

02:11:58.000 You get to see some of the prelims, some of the excellent prelim fights.

02:12:03.000 Alright, so we're going to take this back to two hours in.

02:12:05.000 That's probably when the fight took place.

02:12:09.000 So they did Tom Segura's too?

02:12:10.000 Is that what you said?

02:12:11.000 Yeah, they did a bunch of people.

02:12:12.000 They did Ali Wong.

02:12:14.000 I heard Ali Wong at the comedy store the other night. 0.99

02:12:17.000 She was fucking hilarious. 1.00

02:12:18.000 Dog, she's always hilarious. 1.00

02:12:20.000 She's hilarious.

02:12:21.000 And when she was pregnant up there, when she was ready to bust. 1.00

02:12:24.000 She did her special when she was pregnant.

02:12:26.000 Dog, she was killing me one night. 1.00

02:12:27.000 On a Sunday night, I went down there.

02:12:29.000 And she went up like two before me.

02:12:31.000 I went in the backstone to the gills. 1.00

02:12:34.000 And she said some shit that my fucking jaw dropped. 1.00

02:12:37.000 I couldn't stop laughing. 1.00

02:12:40.000 It's her delivery, her voice.

02:12:42.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:12:43.000 She's got that shit down to a science man. 1.00

02:12:46.000 She's very good. 1.00

02:12:49.000 Look at the size of that motherfucker back then. 1.00

02:12:52.000 God damn, Uberine. 1.00

02:12:57.000 It was ridiculously big back then. 1.00

02:13:00.000 Here we go. 1.00

02:13:03.000 So you're fucking eating. 1.00

02:13:04.000 You're shooting. 1.00

02:13:06.000 You're eating edible.

02:13:07.000 What are you doing to get that big dog?

02:13:09.000 Him?

02:13:09.000 Yeah, you're doing jeans.

02:13:11.000 It's his jeans.

02:13:12.000 A big part of it is his jeans.

02:13:13.000 You're doing t-ball. 1.00

02:13:15.000 You're doing fucking... 1.00

02:13:16.000 You're doing viking cum. 1.00

02:13:17.000 That's what you're doing. 1.00

02:13:18.000 You're eating fucking annaval. 1.00

02:13:20.000 You're eating fucking 16 eggs for breakfast. 1.00

02:13:22.000 But all that stuff is not going to give you that bone structure. 1.00

02:13:25.000 That bone structure is insane. 0.99

02:13:27.000 I mean, he's built like a fucking shaved down gorilla. 1.00

02:13:30.000 There's no one built like that guy. 0.99

02:13:31.000 I mean, that is one of the biggest athletes you're ever going to see in the heavyweight division.

02:13:36.000 Both of these guys.

02:13:37.000 Yeah, both of these guys.

02:13:37.000 Both of these guys.

02:13:38.000 Now, this is pre-Uber?

02:13:41.000 This is Uber.

02:13:42.000 This is Uber-ing. 0.99

02:13:43.000 This is, when you look at the size of him, he's fucking jack-mified here. 0.99

02:13:47.000 Watch when they... 0.99

02:13:51.000 He's got lean muscle, man.

02:13:52.000 263. There it goes.

02:13:54.000 Alistair weighed 263. Brock weighed 266. That's fucking crazy.

02:14:00.000 That's so heavy. 0.99

02:14:04.000 He's got to cut weight to make 266, too. 0.98

02:14:07.000 It's like, whoa, Brock fucking made it. 0.95

02:14:10.000 Yeah, he's way bigger than 266. He's huge. 0.99

02:14:13.000 He probably weighs 280. 285?

02:14:15.000 I bet he cuts...

02:14:17.000 I wouldn't...

02:14:19.000 Be surprised if at some point in time he cut as much as 20 pounds.

02:14:22.000 Those guys get that big and they've been playing football all their life.

02:14:26.000 They just developed this wild quickness, Joe.

02:14:29.000 They don't play baseball growing up. 0.99

02:14:31.000 They throw that fucking thing at track and Well, have you ever seen his combine numbers? 0.99

02:14:37.000 No. 1.00

02:14:37.000 They're ridiculous. 1.00

02:14:38.000 Come on. 1.00

02:14:39.000 Oh, they're crazy.

02:14:40.000 Brock Lesnar? 0.75

02:14:40.000 Oh, yeah. 0.75

02:14:40.000 He's an elite athlete. 0.75

02:14:41.000 Like his vertical leap, long jump, amount of times he can bench press, 225 pounds, it's like 50 or something ridiculous.

02:14:50.000 He's one of those guys. 0.97

02:14:51.000 He's a freak.

02:14:55.000 I mean, yeah, let's see what his combine numbers are.

02:14:58.000 Look at this.

02:14:59.000 He did a 40 in 4'7".

02:15:02.000 Come on, man.

02:15:03.000 He's got a 10-foot standing broad jump, 35-inch vertical leap. 0.88

02:15:08.000 And his bench and squat numbers are ridiculous.

02:15:11.000 Jamie, what was Canseco's 40?

02:15:13.000 He did a 225 30 times.

02:15:15.000 Say that again?

02:15:15.000 30 times he benched 225. Jesus Christ.

02:15:18.000 30 times.

02:15:20.000 If he did a 4'7", what did Canseco do that year? 0.99

02:15:24.000 Yeah, Canseco was like fucking 4'4". 0.98

02:15:27.000 Really? 0.99

02:15:28.000 Let's see.

02:15:29.000 Let's see.

02:15:31.000 That's 40 bases.

02:15:33.000 That's something at that size? 1.00

02:15:35.000 You can't do that shit. 0.99

02:15:37.000 You gotta write 40, Jamie. 1.00

02:15:39.000 Just beating the 40. You don't think he ran it?

02:15:45.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

02:15:46.000 They had it.

02:15:47.000 It says he claimed a 3.9, but that's not real.

02:15:50.000 Oh, he claimed.

02:15:50.000 He claimed a lot of things.

02:15:51.000 He claimed it.

02:15:52.000 He claimed it.

02:15:53.000 Well, listen, bro.

02:15:54.000 He's a serious athlete.

02:15:56.000 Look at the 40-40 club, okay?

02:15:59.000 Just hit that.

02:16:00.000 That's what tells you how many people in the 40-40 club.

02:16:06.000 You know, there's not a lot of people in that, Joe.

02:16:08.000 He was that fast.

02:16:09.000 Look at that, Jose Canseco.

02:16:10.000 This is what I'm telling you, that to get that, you have to be fast.

02:16:15.000 And three of those people were accused of certain things.

02:16:21.000 Yeah, all of them probably did it.

02:16:23.000 I don't know if Alfonso Soriano, but in all of baseball, there's only been four 40s.

02:16:32.000 Here we go, look at this. 0.99

02:16:37.000 Look at the size of that motherfucker. 1.00

02:16:39.000 And again, this is like... 0.99

02:16:41.000 I don't even think it was a year after Brock Lesnar had some serious surgery in his stomach.

02:16:46.000 They removed like 12 inches of his colon.

02:16:50.000 Well, it's not just the size of Alistair, but Alistair is highly skillful as a striker, and just as big as Brock. 0.94

02:17:01.000 So he's got the horsepower to keep him off of him, and his striking is just fucking elite.

02:17:07.000 And so all he has to do is take his time, stay on the outside like he's doing right now, wait for those openings, And then when he finds him, make the most out of him.

02:17:16.000 And you see that?

02:17:16.000 He just slips away from that jab.

02:17:18.000 Like, you ain't gonna hit him that easy.

02:17:19.000 He's gonna hang on the outside.

02:17:21.000 He's not gonna charge at you.

02:17:22.000 Look at that nice counter right hand.

02:17:24.000 Sees him coming.

02:17:25.000 Counters.

02:17:28.000 Super dangerous to strike with this guy.

02:17:30.000 He's so clever.

02:17:33.000 Because he's had some knockout losses.

02:17:35.000 He's a human being.

02:17:36.000 If a guy like Ben Rothwell catches him, he's going to go out.

02:17:39.000 Everybody goes out. 0.97

02:17:40.000 But when you watch him knock out Junior Dos Santos and you see how he set that up, caught him with that left uppercut, you realize how goddamn good he is. 0.97

02:17:48.000 He's sneaky. 0.97

02:17:52.000 Who did Alistair just beat?

02:17:54.000 Was Dos Santos his last fight?

02:17:58.000 I feel like it wasn't.

02:18:00.000 No, me neither.

02:18:01.000 I don't think it wasn't.

02:18:16.000 The power to the body.

02:18:18.000 He stopped Orlovsky, right?

02:18:20.000 Yeah Once they need him, look at Brock Lesnar's face. 0.99

02:18:26.000 He goes, this motherfucker's going right for the breadbasket. 1.00

02:18:29.000 He fucked him up. 1.00

02:18:30.000 These body shots are so powerful. 1.00

02:18:32.000 His technique, like with his Muay Thai, his knees to the body in particular, they're so devastating.

02:18:38.000 He's like one of the best ever in the heavyweight division for throwing knees to the body.

02:18:42.000 Yeah, that kick sent him right back to the WWE, bro.

02:18:45.000 It's the left kick.

02:18:46.000 Watch how he slips this left kick. 1.00

02:18:48.000 It's just fucking... 1.00

02:18:49.000 You could see it on his face as he was going down. 1.00

02:18:51.000 Fuck this shit. 1.00

02:18:53.000 I'm going back to rehearsal. 1.00

02:18:55.000 He sets up this switch kick to the body right here.

02:19:01.000 There's a moment where Brock is throwing the right hand and Alistair slips the left kick underneath it.

02:19:06.000 Boom! 0.99

02:19:07.000 Look at that knee. 1.00

02:19:08.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

02:19:09.000 No, that ain't even it, though. 0.99

02:19:10.000 That's not it, but that was it.

02:19:11.000 Here comes the kick.

02:19:13.000 Boom! 0.99

02:19:13.000 There it is. 0.99

02:19:14.000 That's it right there.

02:19:15.000 That's it.

02:19:15.000 It was over.

02:19:16.000 Boom.

02:19:17.000 It was that kick.

02:19:18.000 That left power kick. 0.99

02:19:21.000 Back up.

02:19:22.000 Oh, I got the phone.

02:19:26.000 That left power kick is a thing of beauty, man.

02:19:29.000 But you know what, Joe, he heard him way before that.

02:19:31.000 You could see it on Brock's face, bro.

02:19:33.000 No, he certainly did.

02:19:34.000 You could see it on Brock's face.

02:19:36.000 He was scared after that.

02:19:37.000 Boom! 0.99

02:19:37.000 There it is. 0.99

02:19:38.000 He was doing nothing but hurting him.

02:19:40.000 No, he was hurting him.

02:19:41.000 But Alistair.

02:19:42.000 That Alistair, that version of Alistair, one of the scariest guys ever.

02:19:47.000 Still is. 1.00

02:19:48.000 Brock is like, fuck this shit. 1.00

02:19:50.000 What do you think about him and Stipe? 1.00

02:19:51.000 What's your thoughts on that fight?

02:19:53.000 Because you're going to be there. 0.99

02:19:54.000 It's going to be a great fucking fight. 0.99

02:20:00.000 This guy's kickboxing is so advanced more than Stipe. 0.99

02:20:05.000 Stipe?

02:20:06.000 Yeah, Stipe.

02:20:07.000 You think so? 0.99

02:20:09.000 This guy's been in fucking Thailand and Bangkok and the jungles of death and Winklejohns. 1.00

02:20:15.000 You know, it's a different... 0.99

02:20:16.000 It's a different type of fighter.

02:20:18.000 I mean, I'm not saying that I'm not taking anything away from Verdum or anything. 0.98

02:20:23.000 I had a feeling he was going to knock fucking Verdum out. 0.98

02:20:26.000 Really? 0.99

02:20:26.000 I had a feeling. 0.99

02:20:27.000 I just had a feeling.

02:20:28.000 He wanted it.

02:20:29.000 He wanted it, Joe.

02:20:30.000 He wanted it.

02:20:31.000 He wanted it. 1.00

02:20:32.000 And those type of guys are fucking, you know. 0.99

02:20:35.000 So, now you've got this guy, and they're doing it in Cleveland, but this guy's experienced. 1.00

02:20:43.000 You know, if he's at Winklejohn, one thing about Winklejohn is those guys know how to put together a game plan, man.

02:20:49.000 And if you stick to it, I guarantee the percentages are high.

02:20:53.000 They put together a great game plan.

02:20:55.000 I'm not taking nothing away from Steope's coach and nothing.

02:20:59.000 I'm just saying that Winkle, that's what they specialize in, Joe.

02:21:01.000 Game plan. 1.00

02:21:02.000 And then they practice it and they fucking... 0.99

02:21:05.000 And sometimes it works against them with Holmes and Misha Tate, but it worked with Holmes and Ron. 0.99

02:21:11.000 They work with Carlos Condu and the Diaz guy.

02:21:13.000 It works.

02:21:14.000 If you stick to their game plan, you'll succeed.

02:21:17.000 Jon Jones, you know.

02:21:18.000 So who knows what they got in store for this kid.

02:21:21.000 Yeah.

02:21:22.000 Well, the way I look at it is Alistair's always a threat.

02:21:24.000 He's just so skillful as a striker.

02:21:27.000 But when I see what Stipe did to Fabio Maldonado, who obviously is a smaller guy, but just had a war with Fedor.

02:21:36.000 Did you see that fight?

02:21:36.000 Yeah, a couple weeks ago.

02:21:37.000 Knocked Fedor down. 1.00

02:21:38.000 Kind of got fucked. 1.00

02:21:40.000 Lost the decision. 0.99

02:21:41.000 It should have been a draw, I think.

02:21:42.000 But either way, at the end of the day, Stipe looked like a murderer against Arlovsky.

02:21:49.000 Crushed Arlovsky.

02:21:50.000 Knocks Verdum out in the first round.

02:21:53.000 Man, it's hard to look past that. 1.00

02:21:56.000 Well, I'm looking at this from that perspective that fucking Mir, his confidence is out the fuck, you know. 0.99

02:22:04.000 He said he was going to knock out Verdum. 1.00

02:22:06.000 He said it.

02:22:07.000 You know, so right now his confidence is high.

02:22:10.000 It's in his backyard.

02:22:11.000 Who knows? 0.99

02:22:12.000 All I know is right now I feel this is a fucking war. 0.99

02:22:16.000 This is going to be a really good fucking fight. 0.99

02:22:18.000 Look at that knee to the body. 1.00

02:22:20.000 Good Lord.

02:22:21.000 Yeah, Stipe's a tank, man.

02:22:23.000 He's a legit tank. 0.99

02:22:24.000 And he's a serious fucking athlete, too, man. 0.99

02:22:27.000 Works hard. 0.99

02:22:28.000 Real talented.

02:22:29.000 Stays cool into pressure. 0.99

02:22:31.000 He's a murderer when he gets in there, man. 0.82

02:22:32.000 So calm.

02:22:33.000 Like, that guy can fight at his very best now.

02:22:36.000 Especially now, with all of his experience inside the Octagon.

02:22:39.000 He's, like, seasoned.

02:22:41.000 You know what I'm saying?

02:22:42.000 I learned about Winkle John when I watched GSP's coach do the breakdown of the Holly Holm Ronda.

02:22:52.000 That was possibly one of the best breakdowns I saw in more ways than one. 0.99

02:22:57.000 I learned so much from that breakdown from what the eye at the house doesn't have a clue of what the fuck you're doing. 1.00

02:23:04.000 The people at home don't have a clue of what the fuck they're watching. 1.00

02:23:08.000 What do you mean? 0.99

02:23:08.000 Like what? 0.99

02:23:09.000 The way he was...

02:23:11.000 Why she was keeping her hips high. 1.00

02:23:13.000 Just little things that I didn't know. 1.00

02:23:15.000 I never even fucking heard of this shit. 1.00

02:23:17.000 Just little things. 1.00

02:23:19.000 And for Holly Holmes to be that good at it, that meant that Winkle John and the other guy, Greg Jackson, Professor Greg Jackson, put this thing together and they drilled that thousands and thousands and thousands and thousands and thousands of times. 0.99

02:23:36.000 So I tell you, Joe Rogan, Every time you feel this hand on your hip here, put your ass out. 0.99

02:23:43.000 We're going to do that a thousand times. 0.99

02:23:45.000 I'm going to come to your house and every time I touch you here, I want you to drop your knees and she can't throw you. 1.00

02:23:50.000 You know, just simple shit. 0.99

02:23:52.000 I like preparation. 1.00

02:23:53.000 The preparation that Holly Holm had for Ronda was fucking money. 0.99

02:23:57.000 It was money. 0.99

02:23:59.000 And yeah, Ronda was consumed with other things.

02:24:01.000 But I was very impressed with that.

02:24:02.000 The preparation Carlos had against...

02:24:06.000 Against Diaz, you know, nobody thought Carlos was going to stay in there against Diaz.

02:24:11.000 Nobody. 0.93

02:24:12.000 Nobody fucking even came close to that. 0.92

02:24:14.000 And I learned something. 0.98

02:24:15.000 I was like, wow. 0.98

02:24:16.000 I fucking learned a lot that night about preparation, how they prepared for this. 0.95

02:24:21.000 So I like that camp for that. 0.98

02:24:24.000 You know, every camp has a different thing. 0.99

02:24:26.000 AKA, everybody that accuses them of being like these fucking, they go to brawls. 1.00

02:24:31.000 You know, they have gym brawls and shit. 1.00

02:24:33.000 You know, I grew up in the 70s, Joe Rogan. 0.99

02:24:35.000 I thought that that was what was acceptable.

02:24:38.000 Yeah, well, a lot of people did.

02:24:40.000 So now, yeah.

02:24:41.000 And they still do.

02:24:42.000 I mean, it's an argument.

02:24:43.000 You know, the problem with this whole conversation is no one's wrong.

02:24:48.000 You know?

02:24:48.000 Like, Eddie Alvarez was right.

02:24:50.000 He did 150 rounds, and it prepared him perfectly, and he went in and took Dos Anjos out, and he won.

02:24:55.000 So, he walked into that fight with two black eyes, Joey. 0.96

02:24:58.000 I mean, that guy had been sparring some fucking hard rounds, probably having some gym more. 0.98

02:25:01.000 So, in his case, it worked out. 0.97

02:25:04.000 Now when I say 150 rounds, do I get Joe Rogan to duplicate Rafael Dos Anos style?

02:25:10.000 You get a bunch of different guys usually.

02:25:12.000 And I prepare for Dos Anos' style.

02:25:14.000 I prepare for guys mimicking.

02:25:16.000 Three with Joe.

02:25:17.000 Three with him.

02:25:18.000 Throw Redman in there.

02:25:19.000 Throw Brian in there.

02:25:20.000 Throw Eddie in there. 0.88

02:25:21.000 So it's three guys that are all mimicking Dos Anos, one facing different guys.

02:25:25.000 Most likely in a good camp, they would want you to try to mimic some of the movements that the guy does.

02:25:31.000 So I know exactly.

02:25:31.000 He puts his hand up, I'm getting set up for this, so I know exactly how to react to it.

02:25:35.000 Well, Mark Henry, who is a striking coach, is a very skillful guy.

02:25:39.000 We're going to go eat pizza today out of respect. 0.99

02:25:40.000 Fuck yeah. 1.00

02:25:41.000 Let's do it. 1.00

02:25:42.000 I like that guy a lot.

02:25:43.000 I heard his pizza is fantastic.

02:25:45.000 Sure it is. 1.00

02:25:45.000 It's got to be in an area where you can't fucking fuck around. 1.00

02:25:48.000 You can't fuck around. 1.00

02:25:48.000 He'll shoot you, so he's got to be a good boxer. 1.00

02:25:50.000 Yeah, I've had some conversations about food with him. 1.00

02:25:52.000 He seems legit as fuck. 0.98

02:25:54.000 I've never met him or never seen him. 0.99

02:25:56.000 He's a great guy.

02:25:56.000 You'd love him.

02:25:57.000 But his strategy and his technical understanding of striking movements and combinations, I'm always very impressed.

02:26:06.000 Very impressed by the training and very impressed by what Brendan Schaub told me because Brendan Schaub did some work with him for like one camp and he said the dude had like fucking notebooks filled with all these different notes about different movements and recreating stuff and drills and all the stuff they were gonna work on and what to do in this and they have different codes for stuff and they change them all the time like five six seven hit them with a two three five like it's all like these codes that they create apparently like he doesn't want anybody patterning it so they change it up This

02:26:36.000 is what Schaub was telling me.

02:26:37.000 Schaub was super impressed with him.

02:26:39.000 And Schaub was like, look, if the dude didn't live on the other side of the country, I would definitely train with him.

02:26:42.000 Look at who he got.

02:26:43.000 He showed up with this guy who beat him, this kid up.

02:26:45.000 He had Frankie Edgar for three, four, five fights.

02:26:47.000 Edson Barboza.

02:26:48.000 He had him for a long time as well.

02:26:49.000 Edson Barboza. 0.99

02:26:49.000 You know, the guy obviously knows what the fuck he's doing. 0.99

02:26:52.000 Yeah. 0.98

02:26:53.000 His striking work with his students is very high level. 1.00

02:26:59.000 Obviously, Barboza's a fucking freak. 0.99

02:27:01.000 I mean, his striking's so goddamn good, especially his kicks, which is ridiculous. 1.00

02:27:05.000 God damn, he's good now. 0.99

02:27:07.000 He's on fire right now. 1.00

02:27:08.000 He's another 155 pounder on fire!

02:27:13.000 Fire!

02:27:16.000 Who did Barboza just beat?

02:27:20.000 Because I'm trying to remember because it was stunning.

02:27:24.000 He was beautiful.

02:27:25.000 He was beautiful, that fight.

02:27:27.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:27:28.000 Who the fuck did he beat? 0.99

02:27:29.000 Anthony Pettis. 1.00

02:27:30.000 Anthony Pettis, that's right.

02:27:31.000 Yeah.

02:27:32.000 That was a fight where Pettis finally got a guy who wanted to strike with him.

02:27:36.000 You know, because Pettis has been getting these guys like Dos Anjos and Eddie Alvarez who could grab ahold of him, squish him, push him up against the fence, use their physical strength in their wrestling.

02:27:45.000 And that was like a guy that, that was exactly the kind of fight that he wanted.

02:27:49.000 And it just didn't work out.

02:27:50.000 Because that's how good Barboza is.

02:27:53.000 He's one of the fastest kickers in the sport.

02:27:55.000 Perfect technique, too.

02:27:57.000 But that's him.

02:27:59.000 He's very good.

02:28:00.000 He was good going in there.

02:28:01.000 But a lot of it, you've got to credit to Mark Henry.

02:28:04.000 What he's done with Frankie, too.

02:28:05.000 One of the most impressive leg beatings I've ever seen was one that I was switching to channels.

02:28:10.000 I saw Jose Aldo.

02:28:12.000 I didn't know nothing about him. 0.99

02:28:14.000 I was barely getting to fucking know the UFC and they got this other fucking league. 1.00

02:28:18.000 Now I gotta watch this shit. 1.00

02:28:20.000 But I saw him. 1.00

02:28:22.000 The reason why I stopped was I just saw his leg kicks.

02:28:25.000 And the next day we got on a plane and you were talking about it.

02:28:28.000 And I didn't know what to say.

02:28:29.000 Those leg kicks were something I had never seen before. 0.97

02:28:34.000 Yeah, he's pretty goddamn sporty. 0.98

02:28:37.000 He throws bombs, man. 0.98

02:28:40.000 He, at one point in time, I guess when he was young, he was a really high-level soccer player.

02:28:47.000 And, like, maybe even had aspirations of going pro.

02:28:50.000 Could have possibly been at that level if he decided to go that path and instead went to jiu-jitsu and MMA, obviously.

02:28:56.000 But because of that, I think, those years of running and sprinting and throwing, kicking soccer balls, he just, he whips those kicks, man.

02:29:04.000 They're devastating.

02:29:07.000 His fight with Frankie and his fight with Uriah.

02:29:10.000 Uriah, that's the one I saw.

02:29:11.000 I didn't know who nobody was. 0.92

02:29:13.000 It's really weird that you were posting shit a couple weeks ago about Ian trying to turn you into soccer. 0.95

02:29:18.000 People from the 70s, we just didn't dig soccer. 0.98

02:29:21.000 Soccer and flutes.

02:29:23.000 We just did diggers.

02:29:24.000 Yeah, again, I'm going back to the flutes.

02:29:26.000 We didn't dig soccer and flutes.

02:29:28.000 I didn't know. 0.98

02:29:30.000 I didn't even fucking know. 0.96

02:29:31.000 I was growing up in the 70s. 0.98

02:29:33.000 You like the Pittsburgh Steelers. 1.00

02:29:34.000 You like the shit. 1.00

02:29:35.000 You play two-hand touch. 1.00

02:29:36.000 And one day, some dude at my mother's bar is like, you want to play football?

02:29:40.000 I go, yeah.

02:29:41.000 He goes, go to Hudson County Park tomorrow at 9. I go up there with my football, these guys playing soccer.

02:29:47.000 To me, it was like fucking a different language. 0.98

02:29:50.000 We just didn't grow up in that. 0.98

02:29:53.000 It didn't become popular in this country until like 85, 84. They started introducing it in schools and stuff.

02:30:00.000 My high school didn't have a soccer fucking team. 0.99

02:30:01.000 I didn't know nothing about soccer. 0.99

02:30:03.000 I knew Pele.

02:30:04.000 I knew Pele.

02:30:05.000 That's it. 1.00

02:30:05.000 That's all I knew about fucking soccer. 1.00

02:30:07.000 That's all everybody knew. 0.99

02:30:08.000 That's how popular Pele was.

02:30:11.000 He's like the Tony Hawk of soccer.

02:30:14.000 Nobody knows anybody other than Tony Hawk.

02:30:16.000 Who's a pro skateboarder?

02:30:17.000 Tony Hawk.

02:30:18.000 That's all everybody knows.

02:30:20.000 Who rides a bike professionally?

02:30:21.000 Lance Armstrong.

02:30:22.000 I heard he did steroids.

02:30:24.000 There's a few guys that they're the only guy that anybody has ever heard of in that genre.

02:30:30.000 Right?

02:30:32.000 Who dives?

02:30:33.000 Greg Louganis.

02:30:33.000 That's it.

02:30:34.000 Nobody else dives.

02:30:35.000 There's no other diver. 1.00

02:30:36.000 Shut up. 1.00

02:30:37.000 Who swims fast? 1.00

02:30:39.000 That fucking pothead guy. 1.00

02:30:40.000 Michael Phelps. 1.00

02:30:41.000 That guy.

02:30:41.000 He swims fast.

02:30:42.000 He's about to fuck him up again. 1.00

02:30:43.000 Everybody else can't swim fast. 0.99

02:30:45.000 He's the only guy we know. 1.00

02:30:46.000 He's about to fuck him up again. 1.00

02:30:48.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:30:49.000 He's about to fuck him up again. 0.99

02:30:51.000 How is he doing? 1.00

02:30:52.000 Has he done any other races?

02:30:55.000 Or is he just preparing for the Olympics?

02:30:56.000 I think he's just preparing for...

02:30:58.000 What?

02:30:59.000 I think he's been winning.

02:31:00.000 He's been winning?

02:31:00.000 He's done a couple races.

02:31:01.000 I don't think he's been actually actively competing.

02:31:03.000 He's done a couple times, yeah.

02:31:05.000 Remember when you get in trouble for pot? 1.00

02:31:07.000 God, that was stupid. 1.00

02:31:08.000 He had to apologize. 1.00

02:31:09.000 That is so fucking stupid. 1.00

02:31:12.000 He could have had a drink in both hands and a cigar in his mouth and no one would have said a word. 1.00

02:31:18.000 And everybody went, ah, the kid's blowing off steam.

02:31:20.000 He had an amazing Olympic career.

02:31:23.000 Think about...

02:31:24.000 Look at the gold medals, ladies and gentlemen.

02:31:26.000 Think about the pressure and relax.

02:31:28.000 Let him have his margarita and his tobacco. 1.00

02:31:31.000 But if you catch him doing bong hits at someone's party, you're like, holy shit. 0.99

02:31:36.000 And whoever that was that narked on him... 1.00

02:31:38.000 Should be shot in fucking... 1.00

02:31:39.000 Oh, my God. 1.00

02:31:40.000 That's why I don't like none of that shit. 1.00

02:31:41.000 How dare you? 1.00

02:31:42.000 They probably didn't even know what they were doing. 1.00

02:31:44.000 Just for the fucking record, that lets you know that that fucking reefer don't even hurt your cardio. 1.00

02:31:48.000 Because Michael Phelps is fucking kicking it up like that, swimming. 1.00

02:31:51.000 It doesn't hurt your cardio. 0.99

02:31:52.000 Those extreme endurance athletes love it.

02:31:55.000 There's been a bunch of articles lately on them taking edibles.

02:31:59.000 They take edibles and sometimes they even stop at tents and vape.

02:32:02.000 They'll have like a vaporizer, like a volcano set up halfway along the way.

02:32:07.000 I have a friend that took a little chillin' with him on a marathon.

02:32:10.000 He stopped at a port-a-john and took a couple hits.

02:32:12.000 Good for him.

02:32:12.000 Yeah.

02:32:13.000 Yeah, I mean, I bet it makes the whole thing a much better experience. 0.96

02:32:16.000 It's fucking way better for yoga. 0.94

02:32:19.000 Let me tell you something. 0.98

02:32:19.000 I do yoga sober all the time. 0.98

02:32:23.000 No.

02:32:23.000 I do yoga sober all the time, but occasionally.

02:32:27.000 I like to go deep and go to the hot yoga class and get my stretch on. 1.00

02:32:31.000 Holy shit, man. 1.00

02:32:33.000 Especially with edibles. 1.00

02:32:34.000 Edibles is the way to go to yoga.

02:32:35.000 You can't smoke.

02:32:36.000 You just feel everything.

02:32:37.000 You can smoke.

02:32:38.000 30 minutes before yoga, you pop a light edible.

02:32:41.000 I wouldn't do 800 milligrams when you go to yoga.

02:32:44.000 I take 200 milligrams, stretch, and by the 30-minute mark of yoga, all that stretching and all that release, the 200 goes to work.

02:32:54.000 And it calms you.

02:32:56.000 And gives you a light buzz and you don't know it till you're stuck in a position and you're breathing. 1.00

02:33:02.000 That's when you go like, oh shit. 1.00

02:33:04.000 Oh shit. 1.00

02:33:05.000 You know, you're right here. 1.00

02:33:06.000 Right. 1.00

02:33:07.000 And you're like, oh shit. 1.00

02:33:09.000 Now I'm feeling it towards the end. 1.00

02:33:12.000 I used to eat banana bread and go to yoga with my wife before I knocked her up. 1.00

02:33:16.000 I used to get fucked up in there. 0.98

02:33:19.000 The only problem with yoga is you can't bring a notebook and a pen. 1.00

02:33:23.000 That's fucked up! 1.00

02:33:25.000 And you can't bring your phone because you're an asshole. 1.00

02:33:28.000 In yoga, when you're in that downward dog stone, the shit that comes out of your spine into your mind is creepy. 1.00

02:33:35.000 You start looking at girls' asses and the teacher. 1.00

02:33:45.000 You know what I thought about setting up? 0.99

02:33:50.000 And I might actually have to do this.

02:33:52.000 A voice activated tape recorder for inside my tank.

02:33:57.000 Because I don't want to leave the tank.

02:33:59.000 No, it's too much sometimes.

02:34:00.000 It's too much. 0.99

02:34:01.000 Those exercises, when you do that type of stuff, yoga stoned, when you're in there, it kills you because you think of shit when you're in a deep stretch. 0.98

02:34:12.000 Joey, you've never floated before, have you? 0.99

02:34:14.000 No, I'm still paranoid.

02:34:15.000 I'm a good swimmer, but I don't want to.

02:34:16.000 But you can't.

02:34:17.000 It's 11 inches of water.

02:34:19.000 Becky's going to take me to Pasadena.

02:34:21.000 That's the biggest place in the world now.

02:34:23.000 Is it?

02:34:23.000 Yep.

02:34:24.000 That guy that opened up that float center in Pasadena is the biggest float center in the world.

02:34:27.000 What's the name of the company?

02:34:28.000 What's it called?

02:34:29.000 Give the homie his props. 1.00

02:34:32.000 I'm not sure.

02:34:32.000 I want to say it's the Float Lab.

02:34:33.000 No.

02:34:34.000 Float Lab is in Venice and in Westwood, and that's the best place on the planet.

02:34:38.000 This guy's got something in Hollywood, too?

02:34:40.000 Just Float.

02:34:41.000 Just Float.

02:34:41.000 Just Float has Hollywood also.

02:34:43.000 Does he?

02:34:43.000 Good for him.

02:34:44.000 I think so, because Becky works with all of them.

02:34:46.000 Inspired by us talking about it.

02:34:48.000 He's a good dude.

02:34:49.000 I met that guy at the Ice House in Pasadena.

02:34:51.000 I'm gonna go float soon.

02:34:52.000 It's amazing. 0.61

02:34:53.000 You know, man, sometimes I go deep and it fucks with me for four or five days.

02:34:57.000 Like the other day, I remember I dropped out of high school. 1.00

02:35:00.000 Who remembers that shit? 1.00

02:35:03.000 Do you know that? 1.00

02:35:04.000 I would remember that.

02:35:05.000 No, dawg.

02:35:05.000 You want me to tell you something?

02:35:07.000 Do you know I went to community college for two years?

02:35:09.000 I did, too.

02:35:10.000 That's the sickest part, but without a high school diploma.

02:35:13.000 Yeah?

02:35:13.000 You could go to community college with a GED. No, no.

02:35:16.000 I didn't even have the GED. You just went?

02:35:17.000 I just went.

02:35:18.000 I just started signing up.

02:35:19.000 They asked me.

02:35:19.000 I told them, yeah.

02:35:20.000 I didn't know.

02:35:21.000 And then when I got the letter that I had too many credits that I had to transfer to Boulder, Boulder was like, we've been looking for your paperwork.

02:35:29.000 We can't find your GED. And I kept telling them it's in there.

02:35:31.000 And they go, well, ain't nothing going to get processed until we have the paperwork in our hand.

02:35:36.000 So it was like a Tuesday.

02:35:37.000 I had to go take the GED on a Saturday.

02:35:39.000 And I passed it and I brought it in and I got into college.

02:35:42.000 That's how I did it.

02:35:43.000 You just bringing that up made me remember that I went to a junior college.

02:35:47.000 I literally had completely forgot about it. 0.98

02:35:49.000 I forgot I fucking dropped out. 0.99

02:35:51.000 Forgot and got sad for a week. 0.99

02:35:53.000 I got sad for a week. 1.00

02:35:55.000 How the fuck can you drop out of high school? 0.99

02:35:57.000 Like, I was thinking like I was single for a while. 1.00

02:35:59.000 Yeah, you were single. 1.00

02:36:00.000 You were fucking dropout. 1.00

02:36:02.000 Who the fuck wants to hang out with a dropout? 1.00

02:36:03.000 You got no future. 1.00

02:36:04.000 So you were thinking this when you were high recently?

02:36:06.000 Is that what was going on?

02:36:07.000 About three weeks ago, I'm writing and I'm out lighting.

02:36:10.000 And I'm trying to figure out a hook for the special.

02:36:12.000 Right.

02:36:13.000 And I'm thinking about what traumatizes you.

02:36:15.000 Right.

02:36:15.000 How can we go in?

02:36:17.000 The other shit they've heard, and it's bullshit. 1.00

02:36:19.000 What really got to me? 1.00

02:36:20.000 And I remember, like, holy shit. 0.99

02:36:23.000 I dropped out of high school. 0.97

02:36:24.000 Junior year, August.

02:36:26.000 Going into senior year, you drop out.

02:36:28.000 And I went in like in January and I got my credits.

02:36:30.000 But I was three credits short to graduate.

02:36:33.000 And they wanted me to go to summer school.

02:36:35.000 And I was like, you know what?

02:36:36.000 I ain't going to summer school. 1.00

02:36:38.000 So fuck you. 1.00

02:36:40.000 So I didn't get to get my diploma and stand and get it. 1.00

02:36:44.000 Which I didn't really care about because I had nobody to show them through the fucking thing anyway. 0.99

02:36:48.000 So in my mind, I didn't really give a fuck. 0.99

02:36:50.000 Why would I want to go there and embarrass myself? 0.98

02:36:52.000 And I should have.

02:36:53.000 Now I would have done it.

02:36:54.000 But then I just wanted to smoke pot.

02:36:57.000 I just wanted to get out of there.

02:36:58.000 I didn't go to my graduation.

02:37:00.000 I just wanted to get out.

02:37:01.000 I felt like that whole experience was just...

02:37:04.000 It was bizarrely frustrating.

02:37:06.000 I didn't like proms.

02:37:07.000 I didn't go to my eighth grade graduation.

02:37:09.000 I went to five-star basketball camp.

02:37:11.000 Instead, it was one of those snow years, so you got to stay in school till June 29th.

02:37:15.000 I booked the basketball camp the 20th.

02:37:17.000 I ain't staying.

02:37:17.000 They went to Great Adventure.

02:37:19.000 Fuck that. 1.00

02:37:19.000 You know, when I went to a good school, too, it wasn't a bad school, but the experience was this overwhelming pressure of becoming an adult. 1.00

02:37:28.000 That was, like, the big experience.

02:37:29.000 That was the scariest part of it, more than anything. 0.91

02:37:32.000 Just the overwhelming pressure of one day having to take care of myself and trying to figure out what the fuck I wanted to do with my time. 0.78

02:37:39.000 High school was good for me. 0.97

02:37:41.000 I'm not going to lie, no, but I had a great time in high school.

02:37:44.000 It wasn't bad for me.

02:37:45.000 I had a great time taking classes.

02:37:46.000 I'll tell you what, till now, I think, I live a couple blocks from Valley College and I always think about why don't I go there at night and take a history class. 0.99

02:37:54.000 I'm an asshole. 0.98

02:37:55.000 I just really learned a history class that I've forgotten. 1.00

02:37:59.000 Right. 0.98

02:37:59.000 This shit just went out of my mind one day, you know, and it's embarrassing when people have conversations and I can't join in. 0.98

02:38:05.000 I mean, people don't talk about history a lot around me. 0.99

02:38:08.000 It's hard to get excited about a class unless you're really thrilled with the subject, but I'll tell you one way to learn history.

02:38:16.000 Podcasts.

02:38:17.000 I know you've been telling me.

02:38:18.000 Somebody else mentioned it to me.

02:38:19.000 Hardcore history.

02:38:20.000 Dan Carlin. 0.99

02:38:21.000 Fucking phenomenal. 1.00

02:38:22.000 Fucking phenomenal. 0.99

02:38:23.000 Just tune into the one about World War I. Have you? 0.99

02:38:27.000 No, I'll listen to World War I. He's got a whole series on World War I. It'll blow your fucking mind.

02:38:32.000 Listen, I didn't like reading about it. 0.99

02:38:34.000 I had a friend that was brilliant, God rest his soul. 1.00

02:38:36.000 This motherfucker was a genie. 1.00

02:38:38.000 Went to Brown, the whole thing. 1.00

02:38:39.000 And one night we would get hired and I'd ask him stupid, creepy questions about the wars. 0.99

02:38:44.000 And he would break it down how Joe Diaz would break it down. 1.00

02:38:48.000 He was from Jersey. 0.99

02:38:50.000 And he would say there was this fucking bar and these people, and I understood it. 0.99

02:38:55.000 When I was growing up, I didn't really give a fuck about history, man. 0.99

02:38:58.000 I didn't really give a fuck. 0.99

02:38:59.000 Somebody was saying, well, maybe you quit high school because you didn't believe in standardized education. 0.99

02:39:05.000 No, I quit high school because I was fucking broke, Jack. 0.96

02:39:07.000 I quit high school because I had to produce something. 0.98

02:39:10.000 I had to do something.

02:39:11.000 And I got a warehouse job, a union warehouse job at Masbach Sentry Hardware.

02:39:17.000 Wow. 0.98

02:39:17.000 It was a fucking nightmare, but I did it carrying chains, cutting chains, putting them in boxes, 6 in the morning to fucking 6 at night. 0.98

02:39:25.000 I loved it, Joe. 1.00

02:39:27.000 Damn. 0.99

02:39:27.000 At the time, it was $9 an hour, but guess what? 0.99

02:39:31.000 After 60 days, a fucking job opened up, loading trucks from 7 to 4. And that paid like $18 an hour, plus I would get into the union, I'd get my benefits, and you worked really Monday through Thursday, because Friday you went home at a quarter of 8, 0.81

02:39:47.000 so I could still see my friends.

02:39:49.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:39:49.000 So I took the fucking job. 1.00

02:39:52.000 Tremendous. 1.00

02:39:52.000 Going there at 7. Nobody else there. 1.00

02:39:54.000 Three other guys.

02:39:55.000 Nobody talked.

02:39:56.000 I put a Walkman on with a cassette, and I would just work.

02:40:01.000 Everything was going great.

02:40:03.000 It's like...

02:40:03.000 Mid-December.

02:40:05.000 I fucking ate something and I went down there at 7 and I just got sick one night and I walked off the property and I kept calling back. 0.99

02:40:14.000 And then they would pick up the phone, so the next day I got a call and you got fired because you left the property. 0.99

02:40:18.000 Even though I puked on the property and was sick and I explained to them, I really got sick.

02:40:21.000 I went home to get a different shirt because I lived like two blocks away.

02:40:24.000 I just couldn't get back in.

02:40:26.000 And they were like, we'll fire you.

02:40:28.000 And then like a month later, it's like mid-January, I go back to high school.

02:40:33.000 I'm kind of broke.

02:40:34.000 I go down there to get my last check and I bump into the shop steward.

02:40:38.000 And I was always smart.

02:40:39.000 Whenever I went to lunch, I'd bring the shops to it a bottle.

02:40:42.000 He liked like J&B, the pints.

02:40:45.000 You'd give him booze? 1.00

02:40:47.000 Fuck yeah. 1.00

02:40:48.000 That's how you... 1.00

02:40:49.000 Bro, when he first put me into the union...

02:40:50.000 And you were in high school.

02:40:51.000 I was in high school.

02:40:52.000 And you would give him booze? 1.00

02:40:53.000 Fuck yeah. 1.00

02:40:54.000 What was the drinking age back then? 1.00

02:40:56.000 18. 18?

02:40:56.000 18. But we were drinking...

02:40:58.000 Of course.

02:40:58.000 In those days, how we did it was we'd get booze delivered.

02:41:01.000 I think when I turned 18 was when the drinking age became 21. Right.

02:41:05.000 When was it?

02:41:06.000 When was the...

02:41:08.000 Find out what age it was.

02:41:09.000 The scam in those days, Joe Rogan, was you weren't going to go get booze at a liquor store. 0.61

02:41:13.000 You had to stand out there like a hooker trying to get some booze and burn a pack of cigarettes. 1.00

02:41:17.000 So what you did was you found the liquor store that delivered. 0.95

02:41:20.000 Oh. 1.00

02:41:21.000 And then when they brought the booze to the house, the guy would say, fuck you, my... 1.00

02:41:25.000 What's the tab? 1.00

02:41:26.000 20. I got 20 on top of it.

02:41:28.000 You gonna turn down?

02:41:29.000 Just say my grandfather's sleeping. 1.00

02:41:31.000 Here's a note from my grandfather that says fucking the booze is for him. 1.00

02:41:35.000 And then we got this guy on the tab. 0.99

02:41:37.000 We would just call him.

02:41:38.000 We'd be on a ride.

02:41:39.000 We'd be at a park.

02:41:40.000 And we'd make up an address and he knew it was us.

02:41:43.000 So we'd give them an extra 20 on the top, and they'd deliver booze to you in those days. 0.93

02:41:47.000 That's a scam that went away.

02:41:48.000 That's interesting.

02:41:49.000 Nobody delivers booze and cigarettes no more.

02:41:51.000 And if you knew the guy, the guy would stop and get you a shrimp parm sandwich.

02:41:55.000 Listen, you mind stopping over at Primo and get me a...

02:41:59.000 It's already called in.

02:42:00.000 They know you're coming.

02:42:01.000 I'll give you an extra five on top of the 20. So you had this guy buying sandwiches for you?

02:42:07.000 We became friends with him.

02:42:09.000 We became friends with the liquor delivery guy.

02:42:12.000 That's hilarious.

02:42:13.000 The liquor delivery guy quit that and opened up a bar.

02:42:16.000 Really?

02:42:17.000 Years later. 1.00

02:42:18.000 Tremendous fucking bar. 1.00

02:42:19.000 Like for six months it failed. 1.00

02:42:20.000 He started selling coke out of there. 1.00

02:42:21.000 And there went the fucking whistle. 0.99

02:42:23.000 So they turned it, the legal age was 21, Jamie pulled up, at 1984. So that was like right when I was turning 17, they turned it to 21. It was good. 0.99

02:42:34.000 When you're 18, that means you're drinking at 16. Yeah.

02:42:38.000 When you're 18, you look 18 at 16 when I was growing up.

02:42:41.000 Not to mention that New Jersey...

02:42:42.000 Well, you're drinking at 16 anyway.

02:42:44.000 Huh?

02:42:44.000 Pretty much everybody's drinking at 16 anyway.

02:42:46.000 They get to a party...

02:42:47.000 You're drinking in the 8th grade.

02:42:48.000 Yeah.

02:42:49.000 When I was growing up, you started drinking in the eighth grade.

02:42:51.000 Some guy smoked pot.

02:42:53.000 Nobody was doing hard drugs.

02:42:54.000 No. 1.00

02:42:54.000 Once that freshman summer came along, people started falling off to the fucking waistline. 1.00

02:42:59.000 But this was the scam, Joe Rogan. 0.99

02:43:00.000 The scam was this.

02:43:02.000 No matter where you lived in the tri-state area, New Jersey, if you check all the residences in New Jersey, tons of people had New Jersey licenses.

02:43:10.000 You know why?

02:43:11.000 Why?

02:43:11.000 No picture.

02:43:13.000 Check and see what year New Jersey put pictures on.

02:43:16.000 That was the scam! 0.99

02:43:18.000 Are you fucking kidding me, Joe Rogan? 0.98

02:43:20.000 So Joe Rogan's got another brother, Nick Rogan. 0.99

02:43:23.000 Oh my God!

02:43:24.000 Joe Rogan's got Nick Rogan and Mike Rogan, okay, in the family.

02:43:28.000 You ready for this one?

02:43:29.000 Joe Rogan's a hustler. 1.00

02:43:31.000 Joe Rogan steals Nick and Mike's fucking licenses, sells them to Joey and fucking the genius here. 1.00

02:43:38.000 They get duplicates. 1.00

02:43:39.000 What, did you ever hear Ari Shafir's story?

02:43:41.000 What? 1.00

02:43:41.000 Ari Shafir's brother fucking used his ID. He forged his ID to get insurance or something like that. 1.00

02:43:48.000 And Ari didn't find out until someone called him.

02:43:51.000 He told a story about it on the Skeptic Tank on his podcast. 1.00

02:43:54.000 His brother faked his ID and got his own fucking ID card. 1.00

02:43:57.000 His brother was a degenerate. 1.00

02:43:58.000 You have no idea. 1.00

02:44:01.000 You have no fucking idea what these savages do now. 1.00

02:44:03.000 No idea. 0.99

02:44:04.000 I forgot that there was a time where IDs didn't have photos on them.

02:44:09.000 That's crazy.

02:44:11.000 That's hard to believe.

02:44:11.000 Do you remember the days when you didn't have to bring an ID to get on a plane?

02:44:15.000 Remember those days?

02:44:16.000 I made up names.

02:44:18.000 You could just get on a plane.

02:44:19.000 You had a ticket.

02:44:20.000 You showed them a ticket.

02:44:21.000 Nothing.

02:44:22.000 Ticket didn't have your name on it?

02:44:23.000 Nothing.

02:44:23.000 You don't have to tell them nothing.

02:44:24.000 You could tell them John Smith and you could fly as John Smith.

02:44:26.000 And you could give somebody a ticket.

02:44:28.000 You could buy a ticket and give it to them.

02:44:30.000 Yes, give it to somebody.

02:44:30.000 And they could just go on.

02:44:31.000 I remember hiding Coke in the lockers. 0.99

02:44:33.000 In the lockers and putting, you know, the ones you got to put quarters in to get the shit out. 0.96

02:44:37.000 They don't even have those no more. 0.97

02:44:39.000 That's how long ago I traveled, Joe.

02:44:41.000 And I would go to a bar and drink and go back and put $10 in quarters, take it out, do two more bumps. 0.86

02:44:47.000 That's how retarded I was. 0.99

02:44:48.000 It cost me $200 just to fucking drink and do a couple lines in those airports. 0.99

02:44:52.000 I forgot about those locker things. 1.00

02:44:53.000 Those fucking lockers at airports. 0.99

02:44:55.000 You ever been to San Francisco and you see the yoga room? 1.00

02:44:59.000 No.

02:45:00.000 San Francisco airport has a yoga room.

02:45:02.000 Oh, no, no, okay. 0.99

02:45:02.000 I didn't know if a yoga room was like a special fucking thing. 0.99

02:45:05.000 We need to go to do yoga. 0.99

02:45:06.000 Next time we work San Francisco, we need to pull in there.

02:45:09.000 It'll be a long time from now since I just did the...

02:45:12.000 I was in San Francisco in 85, stuck at the airport one time.

02:45:17.000 And every time I went to the bathroom, I saw the same guy in there pissing.

02:45:22.000 And after about six hours, eight hours, the guy, you go to piss and all of a sudden he'd pop in and stand next to you. 1.00

02:45:29.000 Hey, look at your dick for 10 minutes. 1.00

02:45:32.000 And then he'd go to the next guy. 1.00

02:45:34.000 So what he would do is he'd look at your dick, go in the bathroom, whack off, and then he would stay in the bathroom until you took your dick out, went up to the thing, and he was lightning quick. 1.00

02:45:44.000 He had the foot speed of a fucking 4'3 Canseco. 1.00

02:45:48.000 He would run next to you with his dick in his hand and smile and look next to you. 1.00

02:45:51.000 How many times did you interact with him? 0.99

02:45:53.000 I didn't interact with him.

02:45:54.000 I was watching him.

02:45:55.000 You know me, Doug.

02:45:56.000 I got an eye for purpose.

02:45:58.000 You're saying you got an eye for purpose.

02:45:59.000 You're in the bathroom watching the guy.

02:46:01.000 I'm not in the bathroom.

02:46:01.000 I'm stuck at a terminal, okay?

02:46:03.000 I'm sitting there.

02:46:04.000 The bathroom's right there.

02:46:08.000 There's like CNN. It's 1985. It wasn't like it is now.

02:46:11.000 The number.

02:46:12.000 Another summer.

02:46:13.000 My flight's at 6 a.m.

02:46:15.000 When I get there, I go to the bathroom, and this guy's next to me. 0.99

02:46:20.000 As I take my dick and wash my hands, you just see what the guy looks like. 0.99

02:46:23.000 Okay. 0.99

02:46:24.000 You sit down, and two hours later, you see the guy going into the bathroom again.

02:46:28.000 Then three hours later, you're going to see him into the bathroom again.

02:46:31.000 And you see him walking out of there and acting suspicious. 0.98

02:46:34.000 And I'm like, this is fucking crazy. 0.98

02:46:36.000 Now I go to the bathroom again. 0.98

02:46:38.000 I'm delayed again.

02:46:39.000 I go in the bathroom again.

02:46:40.000 Guess who's next to me?

02:46:41.000 That same guy.

02:46:42.000 You figure it out. 1.00

02:46:43.000 He's a fucking perv. 1.00

02:46:44.000 I didn't figure it out. 1.00

02:46:46.000 I never repeated this because it didn't make any sense.

02:46:48.000 I mean, it was 85. There was like a buzzer.

02:46:51.000 There was no people there or nothing.

02:46:53.000 There was like a buzzer.

02:46:55.000 You know, that's when you were allowed to walk to the gate.

02:46:58.000 Do you remember?

02:46:59.000 To meet people.

02:46:59.000 So this guy would just go to the airport in the daytime.

02:47:02.000 Just go jerk off. 1.00

02:47:03.000 And go jerk off for a fucking day at the airport. 1.00

02:47:05.000 Well, there's something about men's restrooms that have always been like places where gay dudes hooked up. 1.00

02:47:10.000 Remember where that senator got in trouble? 0.52

02:47:11.000 Well, that's what happened in San Francisco.

02:47:13.000 Yeah, right at the airport.

02:47:14.000 It was like Minneapolis or something like that, wasn't it?

02:47:17.000 They used to have some weird thing they would do. 1.00

02:47:19.000 They would like tap their foot three times on the ground if you want to suck some dick. 1.00

02:47:23.000 Climb under the stalls. 1.00

02:47:25.000 Because stalls, you know, is some footsie room. 0.99

02:47:28.000 You could probably climb under a stall if you're a small guy, right?

02:47:33.000 What's that?

02:47:34.000 It was Minnesota.

02:47:34.000 It was Minnesota?

02:47:35.000 Yeah, I had a feeling it was Minnesota.

02:47:37.000 Yeah, Minneapolis Airport.

02:47:39.000 Larry, yeah.

02:47:40.000 He was apprehended by a plainclothes police officer investigating complaints of rude behavior.

02:47:45.000 He would tap on the thing.

02:47:46.000 Yeah, he would tap on the something. 1.00

02:47:47.000 But that's just amazing that this guy is a Republican senator and he's doing gay shit. 1.00

02:47:54.000 Or, how about this? 1.00

02:47:56.000 Maybe he wasn't really doing gay shit and he had some fucking enemy. 1.00

02:47:59.000 And so some enemy has him arrested for doing gay shit in the bathroom by a corrupt cop. 1.00

02:48:05.000 This is... 1.00

02:48:07.000 If someone says you were sucking dick in the bathroom, man, it could crush your reputation. 1.00

02:48:11.000 Listen to me. 1.00

02:48:12.000 If somebody shoots Buddha over here, and they come and arrest me, and I don't have a fucking gun, right? 0.99

02:48:20.000 They let me go. 0.99

02:48:22.000 Look at this.

02:48:24.000 According to the arrest report cited by Roll Call, Craig tapped his right foot, which the officer said he recognized as a signal used by persons wishing to engage in lewd conduct.

02:48:34.000 How do you know?

02:48:35.000 Maybe he's just got a song in his head.

02:48:37.000 He then alleges that Craig then touched the officer's foot with his foot and the senator proceeded to swipe his hand under the stalled divider several times.

02:48:45.000 Maybe he's out of toilet paper.

02:48:46.000 He didn't want to talk about it.

02:48:47.000 Figured you'd be a gentleman. 1.00

02:48:49.000 Hand him some fucking toilet paper. 0.99

02:48:50.000 At that point, the officer said he put his police identification down on the floor so Craig could see it and informed the senator that he was under arrest. 1.00

02:48:56.000 Wait a minute!

02:48:57.000 Wait a minute!

02:48:59.000 You can't arrest someone for tapping their foot and putting their hand out.

02:49:03.000 Yes, you can.

02:49:04.000 How can you arrest someone for that?

02:49:05.000 Yes, you can, Joe Rogan.

02:49:07.000 You would be pissed off. 0.99

02:49:09.000 If you were taking a shit at the airport, and you saw my gorilla foot with the fungi nail come through that thing and tap your foot, and then my hand comes out and goes like this. 1.00

02:49:21.000 Look, look, Joe. 1.00

02:49:23.000 Like, I'm squeezing your nuts. 0.95

02:49:25.000 You're not going to dial 911 on me? 1.00

02:49:27.000 That's a pervert. 1.00

02:49:29.000 That's definitely a pervert. 0.98

02:49:30.000 I mean, I'm not supporting his behavior.

02:49:32.000 But I just think you need a little bit more than some sign language to get arrested.

02:49:36.000 Isn't that weird?

02:49:38.000 I mean, come on, man.

02:49:40.000 Hillary Clinton, she has like a thousand emails that had classified information in them. 0.96

02:49:45.000 She doesn't get arrested.

02:49:46.000 This dude just taps his foot.

02:49:48.000 He gets arrested?

02:49:49.000 Ten days in jail.

02:49:50.000 Ten days in jail.

02:49:51.000 The sentence was stayed.

02:49:52.000 When I was like 18, there was a movie theater.

02:49:55.000 500 bucks.

02:49:56.000 It's worth it.

02:49:56.000 It was a thrill.

02:49:57.000 There was a movie theater, not in Newark or nothing.

02:50:00.000 It was like a regular suburb. 0.99

02:50:01.000 And we went there one night, and we thought it was like a Rocky Horror, but it was like fucking straight up porn. 0.98

02:50:08.000 It was like straight up Queen Liberty, one of those places. 0.99

02:50:12.000 It was straight up porn. 0.93

02:50:14.000 And we went in there, and we hung out for maybe 20 minutes, and we heard yelling and screaming in the bathroom, dog.

02:50:19.000 Oh, Jesus. 0.98

02:50:19.000 And we got the fuck out of it. 0.98

02:50:20.000 That was the end of that shit. 1.00

02:50:22.000 You could run into, like, the old days? 1.00

02:50:23.000 No, no, no, no.

02:50:24.000 I can't deal with it.

02:50:25.000 Yeah, in the old days, they were...

02:50:26.000 Times Square? 0.99

02:50:27.000 You didn't want to fuck around. 0.99

02:50:28.000 Yeah, I mean, you were involved in madness. 0.99

02:50:31.000 Well, Times Square in the old days, what people don't remember is that you have Broadway.

02:50:35.000 Let's go to the map.

02:50:36.000 You had Broadway and you had 8th Avenue, which is probably the same. 0.83

02:50:39.000 I don't even fucking remember in those days.

02:50:41.000 But the movies started like here. 0.96

02:50:44.000 They were like G... P.G. And then as you went up the block, they got R.R. Then across the street, towards the corner middle, where the X, Devil and Mrs. Jones. 0.60

02:50:55.000 First of all, in those days you couldn't have a fucked up name, like a comedic name. 0.86

02:51:01.000 You had to have a theatrical release name in porn in the 70s like that. 0.98

02:51:05.000 Linda Lovelace.

02:51:06.000 You couldn't have like a spin-off of something.

02:51:09.000 Like it wasn't like that. 0.98

02:51:11.000 They probably had, out of the 12 or 13 movie theaters on both sides, they probably had four movie theaters that were dedicated to straight up fucking porn. 0.98

02:51:21.000 Right. 0.97

02:51:22.000 And then they had one that was a split.

02:51:24.000 That was a movie on the way down.

02:51:26.000 Two movies that were on the way down.

02:51:28.000 You know what I'm saying?

02:51:29.000 The Poseidon Adventure, the Chinese Connection. 0.87

02:51:31.000 They're on the way down.

02:51:33.000 Right.

02:51:33.000 And then you had another movie theater that actually played three movies on Sunday.

02:51:37.000 But then you had the good ones that played the James Bonds.

02:51:40.000 And you know, the really good ones.

02:51:42.000 But it was just always scary to go down there.

02:51:45.000 I used to always go down there, Joe.

02:51:47.000 I bought IDs down there.

02:51:49.000 I played three-card Monty down there.

02:51:52.000 In the eighth grade, I saw Paris Pizziona. 1.00

02:51:55.000 He caught his neck on the fucking thing. 0.99

02:51:57.000 He put quarters in the peep show. 1.00

02:52:01.000 Oh, you told me the story.

02:52:02.000 And he stuck his neck in there. 0.97

02:52:03.000 He tried to get his head in there.

02:52:04.000 He got his head in there, because in those days, they had three days.

02:52:06.000 You know, I grew up down there. 0.91

02:52:08.000 I remember my friend buying weed, and it was that sex weed. 0.98

02:52:12.000 Sex weed? 0.61

02:52:13.000 In the 80s, if you bought Penthouse or Playboy, it had to be Penthouse. 0.88

02:52:17.000 Because they were a little bit more.

02:52:18.000 If you bought Penthouse in the 80s, the last two pages was dedicated to fake weed.

02:52:25.000 And it was that.

02:52:26.000 That was one of the grossest things about those pop magazines.

02:52:30.000 They used to sell fake weed ads.

02:52:33.000 And they would just con unsuspecting stoners. 1.00

02:52:37.000 Stupid people. 1.00

02:52:38.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:52:38.000 And then they'd tell you, don't open it till you walk three blocks down. 1.00

02:52:40.000 Really?

02:52:41.000 I just gave you $22.50.

02:52:43.000 I'm in the eighth grade. 1.00

02:52:44.000 I'm opening this motherfucker right here. 0.99

02:52:46.000 My buddy bought acid. 1.00

02:52:47.000 They gave him paper with coffee stains.

02:52:50.000 Oh, God.

02:52:51.000 Like, little coffee.

02:52:51.000 He bought blot of acid.

02:52:52.000 Like, you gotta be an asshole. 1.00

02:52:53.000 Like, the word got out. 1.00

02:52:54.000 That was like Amateur Street if you went down to Dubai.

02:52:57.000 But there was the last 50 yards of the sex side. 0.60

02:53:02.000 Like I said, so on this side was just regular movies, The Mechanic, Love Bug.

02:53:08.000 You know, it had an array of that style of movie.

02:53:11.000 Then across the street, it would get a little bit more risque.

02:53:13.000 It was Sex World.

02:53:14.000 And towards the end, well, that block there was where Joe, the 50 yards, broad daylight, cops down a corner, and you could hear as you walked with your family.

02:53:26.000 You could be with your mom, dad, kids, and that's all you would hear.

02:53:30.000 Marijuana, acid brother.

02:53:34.000 I got cocaine. 1.00

02:53:35.000 I got some speed, motherfucker. 1.00

02:53:36.000 I got tens. 1.00

02:53:37.000 I got fake IDs.

02:53:38.000 They're just selling it right out there.

02:53:39.000 Right out. 1.00

02:53:40.000 Right out on that fucking 42nd Street. 1.00

02:53:43.000 Daylight. 1.00

02:53:44.000 You know, packed on a Saturday.

02:53:45.000 Saturday was Suckers Paradise.

02:53:48.000 Suckers paradise, and you would walk 50 yards and marijuana, marijuana, marijuana, I have speed, I got heroin, and it was all beat.

02:53:58.000 Because if cops caught them, they wouldn't even go to jail. 0.95

02:54:01.000 Because it was fake.

02:54:02.000 Everything was fake.

02:54:03.000 Wow.

02:54:04.000 And then you hit the corner.

02:54:05.000 So they were getting all tourists.

02:54:06.000 Yeah, they were getting tourists.

02:54:07.000 Then you hit the corner.

02:54:09.000 And they would dissipate a little bit, and then once you hit that street, it would turn into Three Card Montyville.

02:54:17.000 I know a lot of guys who did that.

02:54:19.000 Yeah, and then that's where Three Card Monty would get the tourists, and you'd see people crying, and the kids crying, and then after that it slowed up.

02:54:27.000 Excuse me, then the streets met. 0.97

02:54:30.000 But that was a hell fucking hole in the 80s and 70s. 0.98

02:54:34.000 And now it's a big TGI Fridays. 0.99

02:54:35.000 Big TGI Friday.

02:54:37.000 Nothing goes down down there.

02:54:37.000 It's weird.

02:54:39.000 Nothing happens down there.

02:54:39.000 It became like the place where like top 40 TV shows film.

02:54:44.000 It became this like homogenized mall in the middle of New York City.

02:54:49.000 It's like the worst, roughest part of New York City.

02:54:52.000 Times Square.

02:54:52.000 I mean, that was 42nd Street.

02:54:54.000 That was...

02:54:56.000 There's like these iconic blocks.

02:54:58.000 You know, Hell's Kitchen.

02:54:59.000 That was like right in there.

02:55:01.000 Times Square was like the place where all the lewd movies were. 0.96

02:55:04.000 Times Square was all the sex shops. 0.97

02:55:06.000 Times Square was all the chaos.

02:55:08.000 Now Times Square is like a Guy Fieri restaurant.

02:55:11.000 Six years ago, you took me to New York City, and you know, we're from here.

02:55:14.000 So when we go back to New York, we're not going to bed till 3, minimum.

02:55:18.000 We don't even start thinking about bed till 3 o'clock in New York.

02:55:21.000 Right, because it's midnight there. 0.98

02:55:22.000 It's fucking midnight there, you know. 0.99

02:55:24.000 Or midnight here. 0.99

02:55:25.000 No, midnight here. 0.98

02:55:26.000 So I would fucking, I remember it was 430 in the morning. 0.99

02:55:29.000 I couldn't take it. 0.98

02:55:30.000 I gotta go outside and roll the joint.

02:55:32.000 These pictures Jamie's pulling up.

02:55:33.000 Look at that.

02:55:34.000 I went out.

02:55:34.000 Go full screen on that Kit Kat thing.

02:55:37.000 I walked around for maybe 25 minutes, and Joe Rogan, I didn't see a soul.

02:55:43.000 Look at this video poker.

02:55:44.000 They had video poker?

02:55:46.000 Pinball?

02:55:46.000 You could play poker?

02:55:48.000 I don't remember.

02:55:49.000 Mardi Gras.

02:55:50.000 This is just, it's hilarious. 0.99

02:55:51.000 Look at that girl's butt. 1.00

02:55:52.000 We tolerated tiny little butts back then. 1.00

02:55:55.000 You know? 0.82

02:55:56.000 She's like, look at all this. 1.00

02:55:58.000 Today, that bitch would be doing squats. 1.00

02:56:00.000 They changed the ass game somewhere around 2000. Right? 1.00

02:56:05.000 The ass game pre-2000 and post-2000. 0.96

02:56:08.000 I mean, you want to talk about, like, eras of greatness? 0.99

02:56:11.000 Like, the ass age is here. 0.99

02:56:14.000 If you want to, like, the asses of today are so superior to the asses of our parents' generation. 1.00

02:56:19.000 I mean, it's not even a fucking contest. 0.99

02:56:22.000 Because in our parents' generation, it wasn't even a subject of debate. 0.99

02:56:25.000 It wasn't like, who's got the best ass? 0.99

02:56:27.000 It took them years to figure that out. 1.00

02:56:28.000 It was tits. 1.00

02:56:30.000 Do you think it had anything to do with those magazines like Maxim and stuff that they couldn't show nudity, so they just had to show some sexy asses with a little thong? 1.00

02:56:37.000 That's a very good point. 0.99

02:56:38.000 And they're all sports-oriented, right?

02:56:40.000 Yeah, and that was right around the 2000s and late 90s.

02:56:43.000 You know what happened?

02:56:44.000 Chicks started lifting. 1.00

02:56:46.000 As soon as chicks started lifting, you went, whoa! 1.00

02:56:49.000 Like, it made a big goddamn difference. 0.94

02:56:51.000 I mean, there's always, like, standard measurements of beauty, right? 0.97

02:56:56.000 Like, small waist, big hips...

02:56:58.000 You know, hips to waist ratio, facial features, breast size, you know, something that makes women extraordinarily attractive to men, right? 0.99

02:57:06.000 But I don't think we knew how much a big juicy ass really got people until like the 2000s. 0.99

02:57:14.000 Maybe the late 90s. 0.99

02:57:15.000 The 60s and 70s were breast people.

02:57:18.000 The country, and it was a different breast. 0.88

02:57:19.000 It was a real breast. 1.00

02:57:21.000 The fucking pink was a lot bigger. 1.00

02:57:23.000 The areola, whatever, was huge and thick. 0.99

02:57:27.000 And now it's become the breast, the skin tight, all the fat's been cut off the breast.

02:57:32.000 That's what you look for now.

02:57:33.000 The woman's body has changed over the years. 0.98

02:57:36.000 If you look at a Playboy from the 1970s, both of you guys, you'll call me back and go, what the fuck were people thinking? 0.98

02:57:42.000 Yeah. 0.84

02:57:43.000 And they're still beautiful, but it's a different type of beauty.

02:57:46.000 Well, they just weren't athletic. 0.98

02:57:48.000 If you look at the women in movies in the 60s, they were drop-dead fucking gorgeous. 1.00

02:57:53.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:57:53.000 You had a fucking behead. 1.00

02:57:55.000 Is that Bo Derek? 1.00

02:57:55.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:57:56.000 She was like one of the first to have a tremendous ass. 1.00

02:57:58.000 But her body was just spectacular. 1.00

02:58:02.000 Betty Page, she had a pretty decent ass. 1.00

02:58:04.000 Hard to tell. 1.00

02:58:05.000 See, that girl needs to go to the gym. 1.00

02:58:07.000 Who's that?

02:58:07.000 Raquel Welch?

02:58:08.000 Her ass is probably better now at 90. Look at that. 1.00

02:58:10.000 Whose ass is that? 1.00

02:58:12.000 Whoa. 1.00

02:58:13.000 Quite flat.

02:58:14.000 Unfortunately.

02:58:15.000 I wonder what...

02:58:16.000 She's hot now, though. 1.00

02:58:17.000 What was the chick that fucked Sinatra's head up? 1.00

02:58:19.000 Oh, Audrey Hepburn? 0.99

02:58:21.000 No, no.

02:58:21.000 No?

02:58:22.000 Not Audrey Hepburn. 0.99

02:58:22.000 The chick that went to fucking Paris and went up behind her. 0.99

02:58:25.000 Real exotic-looking bitch. 1.00

02:58:27.000 I wonder what she looked like in a bikini. 1.00

02:58:29.000 Oh, she was stunning.

02:58:30.000 I was going to say Tina Fey. 0.99

02:58:32.000 What the fuck am I saying? 1.00

02:58:33.000 Tina Fey? 1.00

02:58:34.000 I gotta get out of here, man.

02:58:35.000 I gotta go to the store.

02:58:36.000 What time is it right now?

02:58:37.000 It's 10 o'clock, Joey Diaz.

02:58:38.000 Alright, let's do it.

02:58:39.000 Tomorrow night, 9 o'clock, TKO Tita.

02:58:42.000 What's the name of it?

02:58:43.000 The Ka. 0.69

02:58:44.000 The Ka. 0.69

02:58:45.000 K-A-Tita. 1.00

02:58:46.000 M-G-M. You dirty freaks. 1.00

02:58:50.000 Ian Edwards. 1.00

02:58:50.000 Here she is. 1.00

02:58:51.000 Who is it?

02:58:52.000 No, that's not her.

02:58:53.000 I don't think that's her.

02:58:54.000 That's another one.

02:58:55.000 No, no, no. 1.00

02:58:56.000 I think that's his daughter, you dirty son of a bitch. 1.00

02:59:00.000 He's got a... 1.00

02:59:01.000 It was an actress that he was in love with.

02:59:04.000 It didn't work out.

02:59:04.000 Whatever.

02:59:05.000 What are you going to do? 0.98

02:59:05.000 Tomorrow, Cot Theater, Ian Edwards, Joey Diaz, and moi were fucking psyched. 0.98

02:59:12.000 I don't know how many tickets are left. 0.80

02:59:13.000 It was almost sold out as of today.

02:59:17.000 And Joey, what else you got coming up?

02:59:18.000 I know you are at the Ice House soon.

02:59:20.000 I saw your name up on the board.

02:59:22.000 Are you there next weekend?

02:59:23.000 Where?

02:59:24.000 Ice House?

02:59:25.000 Pasadena?

02:59:26.000 No, they had to cancel next weekend because of the surgery.

02:59:28.000 Oh.

02:59:28.000 So I'm just doing isolated dates.

02:59:31.000 They got your name still up at the Ice House. 0.99

02:59:33.000 Tell them to take your fucking name down. 0.99

02:59:35.000 They were supposed to have taken it down. 1.00

02:59:36.000 There's a poster outside that's advertising you being there.

02:59:40.000 I'll call Sean.

02:59:41.000 Yeah.

02:59:41.000 I mean, maybe it's a different date.

02:59:43.000 Do you have a date in the future there?

02:59:45.000 Yeah, I got a date in August.

02:59:47.000 Maybe it's the August date they have up there.

02:59:49.000 Maybe that's it.

02:59:50.000 Maybe that's it.

02:59:51.000 Maybe I knew you were going to be there and I knew you switched.

02:59:53.000 I don't know. 0.87

02:59:53.000 Maybe I fucked it up in my head. 0.87

02:59:54.000 I didn't know for sure.

02:59:56.000 Thank you very much.

02:59:57.000 Thanks, everybody.

02:59:57.000 I love you.

02:59:58.000 Thanks for tuning in.

02:59:59.000 And we will be back on Monday with the great Chael Sonnen.

03:00:04.000 And it should be a fun time talking to him, especially because it's right after UFC 200. And I think Chael has a new submission organization.

03:00:12.000 He's going to do a professional submission organization with EBI Rules, which is the Eddie Bravo Invitational Rules, the best rules in all of grappling.

03:00:21.000 So exciting stuff.

03:00:23.000 So we'll talk to Chael on Monday.

03:00:24.000 That's it. 1.00

03:00:25.000 I'll see you later, bitch. 1.00

03:00:26.000 Bye. 1.00

03:00:34.000 Thank you.

The Joe Rogan Experience - July 07, 2016

Joe Rogan Experience - #821 & Fight Companion - Joey Diaz

Episode Stats

Summary

Transcript