00:18:48.160Believe it or not, it's addressing really two main issues.
00:18:52.720And it's right there in the title, White Nights and Reviling Wives.
00:18:56.120So it's addressing this phenomenon that's arisen as a result of feminism, that the sins of women are a protected class.
00:19:05.100We're not allowed to talk about them or correct them.
00:19:07.380The result has been that we've seen an explosion of wives who fit the description not of the Proverbs 31 wife, but of the other woman in Proverbs, the Lady Folly, who tears her own house down around herself, who's naggy and bitter and rude and disrespectful to her husband.0.99
00:19:26.620She doesn't, or she flaunts authority.1.00
00:19:28.180She doesn't, you know, basically a woman who is characterized by the besetting sins of reviling.0.61
00:19:33.560And that even in many situations where the husband is doing everything he can to try and love his wife, to try and be gentle with her, win her.0.99
00:19:41.440And yet she still just continues to revile and tear her house down.
00:19:54.440Yeah. And this is when, whether the husband or the wife says, we need counseling. Let's go to the church. Let's go to the pastors. Let's go to the biblical counseling office. And let's get some help in dealing with these marriage problems we have. And maybe the wife is even initiating it thinking, he's going to fix my husband. He's so terrible.
00:20:11.720And they go to the counseling office and rather than correcting both of their sins equally, rather than correcting her sins in particular, the pastor or biblical counselor appoints himself the white knight who will protect me lady from the dragon of the husband and amplify or exaggerate all of his faults.
00:20:32.580And basically it becomes a two-on-one where the wives' sins are protected by the white knight of the pastor, biblical counselor, and the husband is often hung out to dry.
00:20:44.860Often divorce follows, estrangement from children.
00:20:47.800And in a lot of these situations, the person doing the bulk of the sinning may actually be the woman.
00:20:52.980And this is happening over and over and over and over again in our country, in our churches, in our biblical counseling office.
00:20:59.680And so David Edgington is a pastor and biblical counselor who's dealt with hundreds and hundreds of cases like this as a counseling center where he helps men in this particular situation and has gained a lot of insight, both practically biblically, into the issue and wrote a great book for us at New Christian Press on the topic.
00:21:18.660so it's for it's really a book that we we want to do two things we want it to diagnose the problem
00:21:25.700so that christian men and women can learn how to see it and identify this pattern of white knights
00:21:32.740and reviling wives yeah but then number two to help deal with it to help actually correct it
00:21:37.900it one of my big hopes for the book is that it's actually going to help pastors yeah there's a lot
00:21:42.340of pastors who probably fell into this ditch not thinking yeah that they were falling into it and
00:21:47.060I just think about all the times where basically a wife is in sin and the advice is it's the
00:21:53.920husband's job to love her into submission when the actual thing that needs to happen
00:21:58.620is no, she just needs to be called to repent for not submitting and then called to obedience
00:23:36.520This to me is one that's like the men in the church, the women in the church, pastors.
00:23:41.660I think it would be really profitable to read together.
00:23:44.940There's a lot of helpful, I think because David is a counselor, there's a lot of helpful counseling material.
00:23:51.760So it's very practical homework to do.
00:23:54.600And even in the course of putting the book together and writing and editing and all that hard work, we had one of our pastors in the church, our counseling pastor.
00:24:02.800He read the manuscript, went through, talked with David, and they even collaborated a little bit on how to make it the best possible book for this subject.
00:24:11.220So we're very excited for the release.
00:24:14.920We are working with a great illustrator that helped us put – we'll have to put it up on the screen or something.
00:24:20.800There's a husband, and he's offering flowers to his wife, and like, here, have some flowers.
00:24:28.420And then on the other side, there's this woman with a rolling pin, and she's going to whack him in the head.
00:24:32.180But then instead of like a pastor in the middle going, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, the pastor has got his Bible and he's like in front of the woman, like defending the rolling pin whacking woman from the, so it's, you know, here's the thing.
00:24:45.780We write books like these and do covers like these so that we can reach out to Beth more and so that we can really get, you know, what's her what's her bucket?
00:24:57.320The one that really doesn't like us with the sex podcast.
00:25:02.960Oh, Sheila, Sheila Gargantuan, Gargantuan, Sheila Gargantuan is going to love the book.
00:25:09.760we'll send her a copy and we'll just say look we we think your audience would really identify with
00:25:15.640this book and uh that you should you know enjoy this this complimentary copy so i i think that
00:25:21.700would go over well i think she's a big fan of uh me pastor edgington pastor edgington of us
00:25:28.560she i mean huge fan honestly emphasis on huge huge fan of us definitely eric definitely no i'm saying
00:25:35.620she's a huge fan that's just point of fact here uh speaking of huge things this episode
00:25:42.120this episode is gonna be huge guys um wow what a transition i know yeah uh hey just real quick
00:25:54.040the pre-order should be open sometime around the first week of november
00:25:57.560so new christen impressed.com make sure that you're checking that out and uh we will try to
00:26:02.680put a link in the description of this episode as soon as we have the correct link, but it'll be
00:26:06.140there on the front page of newchristinandpress.com. Pre-order the book. Pre-orders really help us as a
00:26:11.580small publisher. We don't publish through Amazon. We don't just click print through Amazon and never
00:26:17.480touch our books. We work with small batch printers that we have direct relationships with. We bring
00:26:25.100all the books from our own warehouse, all the shipping's fulfilled by our warehouse team.
00:26:28.900uh it doesn't help jeff besos buy his third wife's um breast augmentation it helps uh real
00:26:36.740christians in our community that's great pay their bills and so pre-ordering really helps us
00:26:41.320uh as to even pay for the large cost that's it's easier with amazon to just say hey publish our
00:26:46.720books on demand but instead we put up tens of thousands of dollars ahead of time to to buy a
00:26:52.260whole run of these books high quality yeah that's that's kind of the the big thing for for most
00:26:57.060people, they ask like, why aren't you on Amazon? Right. And, and as you said, it's, it's actually
00:27:01.600really important point because you know, five or $7 of each book is going to go to, instead of going
00:27:07.740to Amazon, we're going to pay local people who love us and we love them. Um, but also I think
00:27:14.340people don't realize this Amazon kind of like Walmart, um, the, the author and then us absolutely
00:27:22.840get hosed yeah so they take you know 80 percent of the profit they're like here as a pittance you
00:27:29.220get you know pennies on the dollar yeah and so what the funny thing to me is i i thought this
00:27:35.700was annoying in the beginning because i was like well i have to go to the a different website new
00:27:39.420christendom instead of amazon and then the the checkout process is like pretty simple and it's
00:27:45.260free shipping in america just like with amazon yeah it's it's same it's gonna get there within
00:27:50.660a couple days i'm just encouraging people like yes that might be an extra step rather than having
00:27:56.560no you know buy with one click or whatever but we do encourage you to take that seriously and we
00:28:01.480love our people because of that you guys understand what we're trying to do yeah um if you want to
00:28:06.260attack globo homo you can't take globo homo money and you gotta stop funding that whole gigantic
00:28:15.420machine huge monster yeah um we're gonna move on now to some other huge things number one
00:28:21.520uh as we get into the episode brian yeah but thank you thank you uh been working out
00:28:28.580um my deadlift your deadlift i mean huge if people could see the dartboard i threw a bullseye
00:28:35.960eric no before that i did actually throw it i watched it that accidentally went in the middle
00:28:43.820I don't know how it's never happened before, but you know, you did it.
00:29:12.600This was Tim Keller's world, you know, why he could get away with his, you know, super gay third way ism because that's what it was.
00:29:19.080And then now, though, we're in negative world like hostility.
00:29:22.840I think things ramped up with Obama and Obergefell's in there and just the codifying of every disgusting, degenerate, demonic practice because of it was forced on us by a leftist government and people in whips and chains who are like somehow running the show.
00:29:41.180yeah so that all happens we become hostile now it's sort of like a two-fold problem
00:29:48.920all that time we had the silent majority we had cowardly conservatives like i'll believe all
00:29:56.540these things you were talking about this i'll believe all these things but i just don't want
00:30:00.440to pay any price whatsoever for speaking them in public i'm i'm absolutely allergic to that
00:30:05.200so i want to ask you why is it so important for christians to understand like the world is hostile
00:30:09.720We do live in negative world and we have to train our muscles and we have to train ourselves how to live in that world.
00:30:25.000We're in a war not with flesh and blood, but with powers and principalities in the heavenly places with Satan and his works, Satan and his servants.
00:30:31.440But this cosmic war spills over constantly into the physical, political, social, every aspect of the world is at constant war between light and dark, between good and evil, between truth and falsity, between ugliness and beauty, between chaos and order.
00:30:48.980All of these things are – every single aspect of life under the sun, there's a tug of war between God and Satan for all of it.
00:30:58.320It's a high stakes, winner-takes-all battle.
00:31:02.660Okay, so when you look at that war and you say,
00:44:30.640And also, I believe that, you know, Christianity is not fundamentally political because I believe that, you know, I was an agnostic and I understand the saving power of Christ and his gospel-y, gospel-centered gospel-ness.
00:52:24.860When you actually look at the book of Acts, they are disrupting on exactly the cultural points that will cause the most uproar, the most rioting.
00:55:49.920That is what we're aiming at when we stand up to any culture and say, you're beset with sins, you're beset with wickedness, and you need the Lord Jesus Christ.
00:55:58.000Yeah, and that's the point is like to love people, you have to be willing to disrupt the status quo.
00:56:03.720And you have to be able to call out the sin so that they can repent.
00:56:08.860So that's what I would say, like Acts chapter 2, you have these mass conversions by the work of the Holy Spirit.
00:56:15.000And we all pray for that, but do we have the courage to actually address the issue head on?
00:56:24.580One of the things that it requires, Brian, not only for the person speaking the truth, but then there's all these people, like in our church, where really in the sermon what you're addressing is like you need to have courage.
00:56:36.560You need to not be the kind of person that sees the protesters.
00:56:40.920And, you know, by the way, like the CREC church in D.C., like they face this.
00:56:47.000We were talking to some of their elders, like they face this every week.
00:56:51.120The sect F goes to their church like it is.
00:56:54.740The things that I've seen on social media, like they're yelling profanity at people there, as we've experienced, like just to put this in perspective, like people are yelling derogatory things at our kids.
00:57:07.820they're talking about how they're going to steal our kids and make them trannies
00:57:11.620they're talking about how they want to rape our wives they were chanting about how racist we were
00:57:16.660and then as the first service ended and they started coming out the door the very first
00:57:21.320family out the door is the blackest family in our church like absolutely complete like like
00:57:28.280no they just totally totaled and they were like faltered for a second well they didn't know what
00:57:33.220wait a second this is the idiocy of it was like the people who got it worst were like
00:57:37.740a white man married to a mexican lady i'm leaving the church and they're screaming at her saying
00:57:43.680you're a mexican racist and you're like i'm sorry yeah and then we've got the city council woman
00:57:50.020across the street joe burka joe burka is an absolute raging leftist that needs to be unseated1.00
00:57:55.700probably incited antifa to be there she's like filming and posting positively about like yeah
00:58:01.400no hate in ogden i'm like no hate in ogden you're probably funding some of the you know some like
00:58:06.780your groups are probably terrorist organization you're cheering on the people yelling obscenities
00:58:11.780at women and children no hate in ogden f you kids no hate in ogden and so you mexicans need to stop
00:58:21.840supporting these you hate in ogden and i'm like you got there it's it would be funny if it wasn't
00:58:28.260so serious and dangerous and wicked and evil because it's so it's such a caricature of truth
00:58:33.340goodness and beauty yeah and so in the face of that what we need is courage you were speaking
00:58:37.500to this so then the question arises which you addressed but what is courage what are its
00:58:43.140constituent parts yeah like how do we actually dissect it a little bit learn maybe the anatomy
00:58:48.440of courage but what is it because what is what what happens if you're like if you are filled
00:58:53.420with the besetting sin of cowardice cowards go to hell according to revelation so it's a big deal
00:58:56.780I think there's multiple parts. We have to understand that courage is willing to embrace
00:59:01.540risk in service of glory and good. Like courage is the disposition to say, I'm willing to wager
00:59:08.440something. I'm willing to risk something, my life strength, whatever it is, income, reputation for
00:59:16.040the sake of what is true. Courage is willing to endure disapproval for the sake of what is good
00:59:25.140and true and beautiful. It's willing to have a lot of people stand up and say, you're evil. I hate
00:59:31.100you. You should be killed. You should be fired. You should be doxxed. And really, I think C.S.
00:59:37.000Lewis in the Screwtape Letters, he gave one of the best paragraphs on courage ever when he talked
00:59:44.100about how courage is the testing point of truth. Do you have that quote? Yeah. Yeah. This is so
00:59:49.240good. He said, courage is not simply one of the virtues, but the form of every virtue at the
00:59:54.920testing point, which means at the point of highest reality, a chastity or honesty or mercy, which
01:00:00.200yields to danger will be chased or honest or merciful only on conditions. Pilot was merciful
01:00:05.840till it became risky. And his point is that, and this is what I charged the church with on Sunday,
01:00:11.320this test of nerve therefore is a test of all of our work, not just some of it. A test of our
01:00:17.320courage like this is like a test of the mixture that we used in every brick that goes into the
01:00:22.720house. It's not just like a test of the paint on the walls. Courage is the testing point of every
01:00:28.700virtue, which means that if we fail to be courageous, all of the virtues that we thought
01:00:34.140we had crumble to the ground and turn out that we didn't have them at all. Like if I'll be honest
01:00:38.800about what is true only until somebody threatens me with death, then I'm not really honest.
01:00:45.360Right? Every single virtue is like that. If I take it to the point of testing where it requires
01:00:50.300courage to stand on. And then all of a sudden I'm like, no, I don't think I can stand there.
01:00:55.320Well, then that virtue that I had, it turns out that virtue is real, but it's not mine. I don't
01:00:59.440have it. Even though I had the illusion of it up until it was tested. Yeah. And one of the things
01:01:04.240I loved, um, the first week that we had protesters, I think the Lord loves to do this. Like he uses
01:01:10.900the widow's might to kind of shame the powerful and the wise and, um, you know, all of that. And,
01:01:17.900And there was a widow, an older widow in our church, walked in, saw the protesters and looked at a couple of us pastors and said, good, good.
01:12:57.220this is why we have Fox's Book of Martyrs.
01:13:00.740And just from a pastoral encouragement, I guess, to people in the families would be to say, when you're doing family worship, you know, be reading these stories, be reading the stories of the faithful martyrs, but also just brave men and women throughout history who have, you know, to quote Chesterton, fought a losing battle and not lost and stood firm.
01:13:25.380I think having those stories that fuel our souls is really important here.
01:13:34.380You know, today we're in one of those situations where people are saying, well, but if I don't use the pronouns in the meeting, I'll be blacklisted.
01:13:43.880The number of pastors that I've talked to, and they've said things like this.
01:13:48.000Well, you know, I'm going to play the long game here, and that basically means I'm not going to say anything.
01:27:41.940And I'm not willing to enter the fray because I know what the elders' wives on session will say.
01:27:47.060On so much of this, that is the testing point for these men.
01:27:49.600It's so shameful that this is the testing point, but feminism is so rooted in our culture that the testing point of most elders today is are you willing to endure the shrieking and reviling of unrepentant loud women?
01:28:36.320yeah and that that's part of the problem i think a lot of these guys they'll read like joe rigney's
01:28:40.660book the sin of empathy yeah um and they'll be like oh yes amen like we need to we need to stand
01:28:47.100up to that but then your test comes and i know because i've talked to him there's so many guys
01:28:52.700where they're sitting there thinking i know but if i say that thing that's true i know three elders
01:29:02.120wives who will be pissed yep and i think that that's a test of courage that's right here's
01:29:09.240the thing i will tell you as someone who has been through that one of my greatest fears in all of it
01:29:16.060was that my sons were watching yeah and i didn't want them to know that their dad was a coward
01:29:24.520that's right i didn't want to be a coward before my own people and so i i counted the cost and i
01:29:32.200said this is probably what's going to happen we talked through it as a family and then it was full
01:29:38.440send and so there's also an upside to this too when you walk out maybe you get fired maybe you
01:29:44.820get kicked out but you have your dignity you walk out with your head held high you know that you did
01:29:50.720the right thing. And you have the Lord's approval. And this is what all this to me comes down to.
01:29:56.380You have to fear the Lord, not men. That's right. You have to fear God. We had an elderly lady in
01:30:02.740our church in Colorado when I was pastoring. And she was one of the things that put wind in my0.96
01:30:10.060sails. I preached her funeral. Elderly lady. And when we would come to these tests, she would say
01:30:16.320to me, Eric, do you fear the Lord or do you fear men? That's right. And man, I was like, the Lord
01:30:22.820put this lady here. She's just a widow. And she was like, be courageous. Speak the truth. Do it1.00
01:30:29.860for your people. Yeah. Ladies have to understand how heartening you can put the wind in the sails
01:30:33.660of your man and the men in your life, the elders, your husband, like your sons by giving them0.99
01:30:39.720permission is the wrong word for it. By exhorting them to courage and letting you let letting them
01:30:44.400know not only that, um, you're behind them, but that you believe they have what it takes to go
01:30:49.840fight these battles and you'll follow them through hardship for the sake of it. One last thing on
01:30:53.560this in courageously confronting this, these sins and being willing to endure even the reviling of
01:30:57.940women in light of it. People sometimes get the impression that we mean like being really rude
01:31:01.780to women. It's actually, this is perfectly consistent, all of it with Paul's exhortation
01:31:05.760to let your reasonableness be known to all men. Be gentle. When you're talking about the flock as
01:31:10.520a pastor, you're correcting people with complete patience and teaching. You're going back, you're
01:31:15.540bringing them the word, you're bringing them the truth over and over and over. You're answering
01:31:19.080the objections. You are being gentle with them. You're like, all of these things are true. And
01:31:23.640I want you to understand though, that even if you do all of those things, right, there will still
01:31:28.440be cost and people will still hate you and they'll still revile you. And some of the nice pastors
01:31:32.560out there need to understand that, that when the reviling comes, it doesn't mean that you did the
01:31:38.380wrong thing. It doesn't mean that you weren't gentle enough or weren't reasonable enough that
01:31:42.740you didn't have complete patience in teaching. It doesn't mean even that you didn't correct the
01:31:46.640older man, not as a younger man, but with dignity. And no, you can do all those things right. And
01:31:51.120you'll still have a cost to face. Okay. It doesn't mean that you have to rant like we do on the
01:31:56.400King's Hall about some of these subjects. It's a different medium. If you saw us in a counseling
01:32:00.620room, if you saw a shepherd, like it's a totally different mode and gear and context, and it
01:32:06.680requires a totally different type of skill and pastoral wisdom. We're not saying throw all of
01:32:13.960that out. No, we're not saying that at all. We're saying, even if you do all of that right,
01:32:19.100if you truly stand for the Lord on the issues that are most pressing today,
01:32:23.600you can expect even then to face hatred, reviling. And it's ultimately because
01:32:29.380um satan doesn't care about what's true he hates you satan could lose in a debate to you and he
01:32:38.240would never say oh i acquiesce the syllogism was correct that was a modus ponens and it was both
01:32:44.700valid and sound the premises were true and the the conclusion followed from the premises with
01:32:51.660force it's he's not gonna satan's gonna go oh yeah well let me try to kill you can i ask one
01:32:56.680question and in closing um and the question is this i we've seen this a lot i've seen a lot in
01:33:03.420the last 10 years the overton window has shifted and there are guys who are waiting for it to open
01:33:10.860enough for them to speak the true thing when it's acceptable yeah they're waiting for the tide to
01:33:19.360shift why would you counsel and encourage especially pastors leaders business owners etc
01:33:25.560Why would you encourage them to not wait until it's favorable?
01:33:30.660It's because when we talk about the Overton window shifting, we're not talking about some
01:33:35.120theoretical political euphemism that has no bearing on the good and the soul and the life
01:33:41.340of our neighbors. We're talking about the victory and triumph of good over evil, of truth over
01:33:47.080falsehood, of beauty over ugliness. And so you should be asking the question, will that Overton
01:33:53.020window move towards truth and goodness and life and beauty faster and more effectively if more
01:34:00.260men would be on the battlefield than if not? And the answer is yes. So the fact that it took the
01:34:06.040Overton window 10 years to move to where it has today on the issue of transgenderism means that
01:34:11.740there were 10 more years where children were being chemically castrated and mutilated legally,
01:34:16.540where they were being torn from their fathers by wicked mothers and vice versa. That was 10 more
01:34:21.440years where thousands and thousands of people mutilated themselves and committed suicide and
01:34:26.300died and went to hell. Because guess what? There were thousands and millions of Christians in
01:34:32.440America who looked at it and said, I know that's not right. I know that's wicked. But if I oppose
01:34:38.340it, oh, if I oppose it, I might have a cost. It might cost me my job. It might cost me social
01:34:43.960ostracism. You're basically the guy with his sword and his shield. You're standing on the
01:34:48.180sidelines and you're saying when the battle turns in our favor and it looks like we're going to win
01:34:52.760then i will rush into the fray what would you say to a man like that you're a coward you're an
01:34:57.140absolute coward you're an absolute coward you're unworthy of the uniform of your of your army
01:35:02.280you're unworthy so we're all going to get some of these things wrong we're all going to like and
01:35:06.860there there's a difference where sometimes you you're not certain on an issue and you're way
01:35:10.640and you're thinking you're way that's good like don't don't be hasty don't be rash be wise but
01:35:16.060don't let a supposed or alleged concern for the truth and for thoroughness and your arguments
01:35:22.400keep you from joining the battle when you know what is true and you're actually just scared of
01:35:27.840the outcome. You're scared of the cost. I think that is an encouragement and an exhortation
01:35:32.620that all Christian men today need to hear. Yeah, that's great. So just encourage our listeners,
01:35:37.700be strong and courageous. Hopefully the content has challenged you. Also encourage you to stick
01:35:42.940around for the king's hall after hours we do a lot of q a we go through a lot of other pressing
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01:36:18.840even if you don't become a patron, but you know, a dozen hands touch every, any episode of the
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01:36:32.120the great business partners, Christian businesses that partner with us. You should check them out.
01:36:36.100I mean, Joe Garracy, Backwards Planning Financial, helping Christian families and fathers chart a path forward for financial legacy in wisdom and navigating these difficult and inflationary times.
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01:36:51.400You should check out all of the great sponsors that sponsor the King's Hall because you can know if they're willing to put their name to this podcast that they're your people.
01:36:58.580yeah and i would just say for those guys like when we have advertisers they're not just like
01:37:05.220ran hey we'll give you money we're just randos better help online therapy from homosexuals
01:37:11.740better help yeah it's not that like most of these guys we're gonna get sued
01:37:17.040we we know them they're good men and so we want to practice in group preference yeah we want to
01:37:23.820reward men who are being courageous with us yeah and we thank you guys all our sponsors for fighting
01:37:29.420that good fight yeah uh including luxe coffee yeah i've been luxe coffee get pre-ordered david
01:37:35.480edgington's book white knights and reviling wives how feminism destroys families it's going to be
01:37:39.200great everybody's saying it yeah and there's another one like how many bad trump david has
01:37:46.040like been courageous and been cut out of every publishing house been cut out of acbc yeah you
01:37:53.200No one will have anything to do with him.
01:37:55.780And so now that there's an opportunity where he steps forward, he writes a book, we publish it.