The Matt Walsh Show - June 28, 2023


AITA For Ending A Friendship？ Matt Walsh Decides

Topics
blocking a friend and rivalry obsession
Hosted by
Matt Walsh
Mentioned
Peter Matthews Stanley Matt Mark
How To Find Your Perfect Match - Matt Walsh Advice Matt Walsh DEBUNKS Anti Alien Propaganda - Part 1

Episode Stats


Length

11 minutes

Words per minute

192.31

Word count

2,180

Sentence count

166

Harmful content

Misogyny

5

sentences flagged

Toxicity

29

sentences flagged

Hate speech

4

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, we answer the question, "Am I an A.O.C. in this situation?" by Austin, who has two kids, an infant, and a 3-year-old, and wants to know if he's a bad guy because he's not married yet.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.720 What is an asshole? Can you tell me that? 1.00
00:00:04.040 What is that? 1.00
00:00:07.680 What is an asshole? 1.00
00:00:09.260 How do I know if I'm a asshole? 1.00
00:00:12.440 That's a great question. 0.99
00:00:13.720 So we'll go through some of these questions today.
00:00:30.480 We'll start from Austin.
00:00:32.100 It says, my girlfriend and I have two kids together, an infant and a three-year-old.
00:00:35.840 You're not married?
00:00:38.140 I've worked at the same place for four years and she got a job a few months back.
00:00:41.340 I don't mind if she works, but the kids cry for her every night that she's gone
00:00:45.020 and they won't sleep until she gets off at 4 a.m.
00:00:48.020 I've run down the checklist and they will not sleep until mom gets home.
00:00:51.720 I asked if she cannot work now.
00:00:53.740 So you've asked if she can stop working and I can work extra until the kids are a bit older
00:00:57.740 and our living situation is a bit more stable.
00:00:59.740 But she claims that even though it's difficult for the kids and I when she's gone at work,
00:01:03.720 it's not fair that I get to leave to go to work all the time and she's stuck at home with the kids 24-7.
00:01:08.820 And I told her life isn't fair and life will be more difficult if we just do everything on a basis of fairness.
00:01:14.900 Am I the a-hole?
00:01:17.800 Yes, but not for the reasons you might think.
00:01:21.200 First of all, life isn't fair.
00:01:23.740 Like that statement in an argument is rarely going to have a positive response.
00:01:32.940 You're rarely going to get a productive or positive response when you use the phrase life isn't.
00:01:37.380 Yeah, well, life isn't fair.
00:01:38.620 It's true, though. 0.82
00:01:39.480 I mean, it is true that life is like fundamentally not fair.
00:01:43.360 Life is unfair.
00:01:44.920 And so you cannot be obsessed with fairness all the time.
00:01:47.840 So you're not wrong in the point, but when you're having this discussion with your girlfriend.
00:01:54.760 But my issue is just that.
00:01:57.080 So you're having this conversation with your girlfriend.
00:01:59.600 So if you're an a-hole in this situation for any reason, it's that like, why aren't you two married yet? 0.99
00:02:04.020 Man and wife.
00:02:05.260 Say man and wife. 0.51
00:02:06.960 You have kids.
00:02:09.300 You and your girlfriend have a three-year-old and you're expanding the family.
00:02:14.520 And now you have an infant.
00:02:15.440 And you are tied with each other already for life because you have a kid.
00:02:23.220 You have two kids together.
00:02:24.140 You have a family.
00:02:25.940 And yet you're not married. 1.00
00:02:27.460 So put the damn ring on and take his ass down to the court. 1.00
00:02:30.720 To me, that's what I zero in on with this is that you got to get married. 1.00
00:02:35.860 But it's relevant to your question, too, because if you're married and you've both made that commitment to each other,
00:02:43.000 then I think you've got a much stronger argument you can make that you could present to who would now be your wife and say,
00:02:50.400 listen, how about for at least right now, you don't need to work.
00:02:53.740 You're working overnight.
00:02:54.780 You're doing all this.
00:02:55.480 Let me take care of you.
00:02:56.820 Okay, let me take care of the family.
00:02:59.320 And we just had a baby.
00:03:00.780 The baby's an infant.
00:03:02.000 Baby needs you here.
00:03:03.500 Like you could, I think that's a, you can make a stronger argument for that if you guys are married, but you're not.
00:03:09.400 The argument is weaker and, and without that commitment, she's probably also thinking, like, if you're not married, then the exit is always just like right there.
00:03:18.220 You know, you could walk out at any time.
00:03:21.300 And so maybe she's thinking, well, I got to, I got to maintain a certain level of financial independence because we're not married.
00:03:27.940 And I don't know, this thing could fall apart at any time.
00:03:30.240 Men are the coolest, but I don't need them to survive. 0.99
00:03:32.780 You do actually need men to survive.
00:03:34.500 Get married first, then circle back.
00:03:39.260 From Matthews says, hey, Matt, am I the a-hole in this situation?
00:03:42.280 I blocked a friend who is also an SBG member.
00:03:45.720 You better have a good reason for that.
00:03:47.540 On my phone, because on two separate occasions recently, he was rubbing in that my favorite sports team lost.
00:03:54.280 And I was not in the mood for it since I had a funeral for my grandfather.
00:03:57.660 And he was aware of that.
00:03:59.020 But hang on a second.
00:03:59.540 So you were at the funeral of your grandfather, and you're getting texts from your friend making fun of you because your team lost? 1.00
00:04:08.280 Man, you are one pathetic loser. 1.00
00:04:12.000 Is that what happened? 1.00
00:04:15.480 Okay.
00:04:15.960 In my prior interactions with him, he crosses the line from friendly banter to being obsessed with the rivalry and making the school he roots for a personality trait, even though he didn't even attend the school.
00:04:25.660 I also wanted to know your opinion on people like him who are obnoxious about college sports rivalries when they didn't even attend the college they support.
00:04:33.240 Well, the not attending the college thing, that to me doesn't really make a difference.
00:04:37.600 You don't have to have a direct tie to the team in that way to root for the team.
00:04:42.500 You know, I'm a big Baltimore sports fan, so I'm a fan of the Baltimore Ravens.
00:04:48.540 You know, I was never on the team.
00:04:50.040 I never had any official involvement with the team.
00:04:54.820 But I still consider them my team, and when I talk about them to someone else, I use the word like we and us.
00:05:00.480 We played real poorly out there on Sunday, like that kind of thing, even though I am in no way a part of the team.
00:05:05.780 So I don't think that's the problem.
00:05:06.660 The problem is what you said about making your fandom your entire personality.
00:05:14.200 And when someone does that, you know, yeah, it's going to be hard to have any kind of real friendship with them.
00:05:19.040 I mean, blocking their number on your phone is a pretty drastic step, but it's going to be hard to be friends with someone when that's the only thing you can relate on.
00:05:27.400 That's their whole personality.
00:05:29.200 Sorry I annoyed you with my friendship.
00:05:30.800 And this is where I think some people, you know, I bring up adults who are obsessed with video games.
00:05:37.000 Yeah, you want a piece of this? 1.00
00:05:38.140 F*** you, dude. 1.00
00:05:39.460 Adults who are obsessed with superheroes. 1.00
00:05:41.340 Adults who are obsessed with, like, going to Disney World. 0.99
00:05:44.140 Silly adult. 0.99
00:05:45.160 Disney for kids. 0.94
00:05:46.460 And anytime I bring any of those things up and I say that the adults who are obsessed with these things need to grow up a little bit, I always hear, well, what about sports fans?
00:05:54.360 You know, that's a game.
00:05:55.420 It's the same kind of thing.
00:05:56.420 There's nothing wrong with being a fan of a sports team, but if that's your entire identity, you know, if you get way too wrapped up in it, where it's the most important thing in your life, and you're giving exorbitant amounts of time and energy to it, well, that's when it becomes a problem.
00:06:15.360 And that's when you need to recalibrate, I would say.
00:06:17.620 The one-year anniversary of Roe versus Wade being overturned is coming up, and since then, the left has absolutely lost their minds.
00:06:23.500 Pro-life efforts, which are more important now than ever, are booming.
00:06:26.880 You heard that right.
00:06:27.700 Despite the narrative, pro-lifers actually are not going away.
00:06:31.100 They have increased in number.
00:06:32.700 Four Days for Life is changing hearts and minds in the most blue pro-abortion states in the country.
00:06:36.740 They've had a record number of locations since Roe was overturned.
00:06:39.680 They grew in both volunteers and locations.
00:06:42.200 With about 1 million volunteers in 1,500 cities, they hold peaceful vigils outside abortion facilities.
00:06:46.780 This success has come with new unwanted attention, as you'd imagine, from the federal government and the DOJ in regards to free speech.
00:06:52.640 As one of the largest pro-life organizations in the world, no one is in a better position than 40 Days for Life to end abortion in each state in a post-Roe America. 0.97
00:07:02.840 You can help them fight the ongoing legal battles of protecting free speech for their volunteers, including Mark, the 40 Days for Life volunteer who had his house raided by the FBI.
00:07:11.140 Help them defend free speech by giving a tax-deductible gift of any amount at 40daysforlife.com.
00:07:17.100 That's 40daysforlife.com.
00:07:18.820 All right.
00:07:21.420 From SBG Wife says,
00:07:23.280 Looking for your valued opinion on whether or not I am the a-hole for refusing to name my hypothetical future son after my husband.
00:07:31.100 For context, my husband and I recently got married and planned to start a family within the next two years.
00:07:35.440 My husband was the only son in his family and was named after his father.
00:07:39.420 Same first and different middle.
00:07:40.980 But he is not a junior or the second.
00:07:42.900 I hate that.
00:07:44.400 In all conversations with his mom and family, I never know which of the two they're referring to.
00:07:48.180 Oh, sorry.
00:07:49.280 Did you mean?
00:07:50.620 Peter, Peter.
00:07:51.680 We're all called Peter.
00:07:52.700 Yeah, we're all called Peter.
00:07:53.220 God willing, we both like to have two to four kids and love to play around with the baby name ideas.
00:07:58.060 From the get-go, I told him that if we have a son, we will not be giving him the same name as my husband.
00:08:03.540 It's confusing and, to put it nicely, a name I never have cared for, which is a point that I leave out of the conversation.
00:08:10.120 Wisely so, I would say.
00:08:11.000 At first, my husband was either understanding or indifferent about it.
00:08:13.660 Now he's growing more and more insistent on our firstborn son having his name.
00:08:17.940 If my husband was formerly the second or suffix junior, I would begrudgingly oblige for the sake of continuing the tradition,
00:08:23.940 something that his parents didn't care to initiate, and my husband doesn't find important either.
00:08:28.160 I know this is all hypothetical, but am I the a-hole for refusing to name our future son after my husband and his father?
00:08:35.340 I am also a believer that the woman carries the baby, and all, should have a majority rule over the name selection.
00:08:41.080 I'm willing to compromise and either have his name be our child's middle name,
00:08:44.300 or, if given his name as first, refer to our son by his middle name only, neither of which my husband is fond of.
00:08:51.380 Lay your sweet daddy advice down. 0.94
00:08:53.240 Okay, yeah, you are the a-hole, actually, on this one. 1.00
00:08:56.080 Stanley, you call your friend an asshole this instant. 1.00
00:08:58.900 I gotta give you the, yeah, I gotta give you the title of a-hole on this one. 1.00
00:09:03.320 Two reasons.
00:09:04.360 One is that, yeah, I do believe if this is something, this is important to your husband,
00:09:09.440 and he feels called to have his firstborn son be named after him to carry on,
00:09:16.380 and even if you don't put junior or the second or something after it,
00:09:20.200 it still is carrying on the name and carrying on the tradition.
00:09:23.680 For our first son, my wife is the one who suggested it, so maybe you could be a junior,
00:09:28.660 and I shot it down because it's just not something, you know, I didn't want to give my kid the junior.
00:09:34.720 I didn't want to make him a junior.
00:09:36.100 Don't call me junior.
00:09:37.440 But for some men, that's important to them, and I think that you should respect that.
00:09:43.460 And then secondly, the woman has majority rule over the name selection. 1.00
00:09:49.460 No. 1.00
00:09:49.980 That's dumb. 1.00
00:09:51.760 You're dumb. 1.00
00:09:52.480 No, that's not the way that works. 1.00
00:09:55.600 You are equal participants in creating the baby.
00:10:01.180 You're both going to be equal participants in raising and caring for the baby in different ways.
00:10:06.940 You know, your husband playing the role of father, you playing the role of mother,
00:10:10.760 but you're still both intricately involved and indispensably involved.
00:10:18.020 You were doing okay until you got to the last paragraph,
00:10:20.440 and you claimed that the woman should have the final say on names. 1.00
00:10:24.440 That's not the way it should go.
00:10:28.960 And I think, here's the way that, with my wife,
00:10:32.320 we never came up with, like, an exact system for coming up with names.
00:10:35.940 We just sort of, with each new kid, we try to think of a name,
00:10:40.140 and we had different strategies that we utilized.
00:10:43.880 But on a few of the occasions, you know, because, like, we have a million kids.
00:10:48.900 We've gone through this a bunch of times.
00:10:50.340 And there have been a few occasions where my wife just felt really strongly
00:10:53.440 about a certain name.
00:10:55.020 And I said, well, you feel that strongly about it.
00:10:57.420 Let's go with that.
00:10:57.940 And there were other times I felt strongly about a certain name.
00:11:00.160 So I think if one member in the couple feels really strongly,
00:11:04.060 like, I really want this name,
00:11:06.040 and you don't have those same strong feelings for a different name,
00:11:08.780 then I would defer to him.
00:11:10.480 Okay. 0.88
00:11:11.840 You a-hole. 0.99
00:11:12.600 Were you born an a**hole? 1.00
00:11:16.920 Or did you work it in your whole life? 1.00