The Matt Walsh Show - Am I The A＊＊hole？ Matt Walsh Decides - Part 5

00:00:00.000 Well, a crowd fan favorite segment here. We're going to go back now to Reddit's

00:00:04.980 Am I the A-Hole Forum, where people present their moral quandaries, their gripes,

00:00:11.800 their disputes with other people in their lives, and they want to know,

00:00:15.080 are they the a-hole or is somebody else the a-hole? 0.69

00:00:17.840 And oftentimes the advice they get from Reddit in this regard is very, very bad,

00:00:21.660 which is why I feel like I need to come in here and save the day

00:00:23.860 and give the official proclamation. So we'll start with this.

00:00:26.920 Showtime, a-holes. 1.00

00:00:27.940 First one says,

00:00:29.120 My husband, and then in parentheses it says Asian,

00:00:32.900 My husband, Asian, and I, American, welcomed our firstborn four weeks ago.

00:00:37.500 The baby is healthy, thank God, but I'm exhausted.

00:00:40.060 My husband's family had been pressuring us to visit to meet the baby.

00:00:43.260 Yesterday I was surprised to find them standing on the porch.

00:00:45.920 I was embarrassed and felt like I wasn't ready for visitors,

00:00:48.720 because the house was a N-E-S-S, y'all. 0.99

00:00:52.020 A mess.

00:00:52.720 Later I asked my husband if we should order takeout for dinner.

00:00:55.200 He said no, because his parents would find this rude and unwelcoming.

00:00:58.700 He suggested that I go inside the kitchen and prepare something.

00:01:01.480 I said fine, then went and made some mac and cheese.

00:01:04.660 Once I served the family, my husband's mom asked if I really found it appropriate

00:01:07.940 to serve her and the family mac and cheese.

00:01:11.640 I hate macaroni and cheese.

00:01:13.720 We had an argument and they decided to go home.

00:01:15.300 My husband said that deciding to serve his family mac and cheese

00:01:17.240 was more offensive than serving them nothing at all.

00:01:19.660 Am I the a-hole? What's wrong with mac and cheese?

00:01:21.300 Wow, okay.

00:01:23.320 So this husband, here's the note, guys.

00:01:28.820 He's going to help?

00:01:29.480 Okay, I got a notepad.

00:01:30.620 You want to give your wife at least a week's notice.

00:01:34.380 If you're giving her a day, it's going to be a problem. 1.00

00:01:36.460 But they're here right now.

00:01:38.360 The house is a mess.

00:01:39.240 You just can't do that.

00:01:40.400 You cannot do that.

00:01:41.160 If you want to have a happy marriage,

00:01:43.400 you just cannot do things like that.

00:01:45.480 Then again, it's easy for me to say,

00:01:47.200 because I'm never really tempted to invite guests over for dinner in the first place.

00:01:52.220 So that's not something I'd ever really,

00:01:53.780 I'd ever want to do that anyway.

00:01:55.280 So I've never been tempted in that direction.

00:01:56.740 But if I were going to do it,

00:01:58.180 and on the rare occasion when I do,

00:02:00.700 you know, you can never give too much notice.

00:02:02.400 If you can give a year's notice for that,

00:02:03.880 that's probably best.

00:02:04.980 But I kind of like these kinds of questions

00:02:06.540 because this is one where I get to say, 0.77

00:02:08.080 you're all a-holes actually. 1.00

00:02:10.860 You are all a-holes. 0.99

00:02:12.540 Now, obviously, your mother-in-law and husband are a-holes, 1.00

00:02:15.820 imposing yourself on somebody, 0.77

00:02:18.040 especially a mother with a baby, expecting a feast.

00:02:20.800 One of my absolute unwavering non-negotiable principles

00:02:23.380 is that you never complain about food that has been served to you.

00:02:28.600 This is why we don't have picky eaters in my house, okay?

00:02:31.080 Picky eaters are a social construct. 0.83

00:02:34.160 They are made, not born. 0.92

00:02:35.940 My kids will eat anything, anything we serve them,

00:02:39.060 because that's the only option we've ever given them.

00:02:41.140 You are going to finish your dessert,

00:02:43.540 and you are going to like it!

00:02:46.020 But I also have to, unfortunately,

00:02:47.640 give you a demerit for serving mac and cheese.

00:02:50.480 Yes, they should have eaten it without complaint,

00:02:52.960 but I can complain because I'm not there,

00:02:54.940 so I'm not beholden to that rule.

00:02:56.940 And as an outside observer,

00:02:58.120 I can say that mac and cheese is for children.

00:03:00.320 More mac and cheese?

00:03:01.260 Yeah, just keep it going.

00:03:02.120 Keep it going.

00:03:02.500 Don't be afraid of the burned edges.

00:03:03.820 Just give me the tray.

00:03:04.540 There should be no room on an adult's plate for mac and cheese.

00:03:07.140 There's so many better, more sophisticated side options.

00:03:09.500 So you're all going to be a-holes for that one.

00:03:11.840 When you use the bathroom,

00:03:13.120 you always lock the door behind you, right?

00:03:15.540 Well, you don't want some random person

00:03:17.280 accidentally walking in on you.

00:03:18.680 So why would you let people walk in on your online data?

00:03:22.000 Using the internet without ExpressVPN,

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00:03:32.900 knows every single website you visit?

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00:04:22.980 Next one says,

00:04:23.560 I work a pretty standard day job

00:04:24.720 and at night I help my friend at her restaurant,

00:04:26.420 which serves an assortment of Thai cuisine.

00:04:28.840 To be honest, I'm insanely picky,

00:04:30.280 but I fell in love with this peanut sauce.

00:04:32.120 So about once a week,

00:04:32.860 I take it on either noodles or stir fry

00:04:35.440 to my day job for lunch.

00:04:37.060 Thursday, I took my noodles

00:04:38.060 and my entire Tupperware was missing.

00:04:39.640 Today, my boss confronted me

00:04:40.800 and accused me of poisoning my noodles

00:04:42.420 because his daughter, one of the new girls,

00:04:44.340 borrowed my lunch and had to be hospitalized.

00:04:46.440 Turns out she is severely allergic to nuts

00:04:48.740 and she ate some and boom,

00:04:51.140 she went into anaphylactic shock

00:04:52.440 and had to be hospitalized.

00:04:53.600 Now her dad is trying to hold me accountable

00:04:54.920 for her bills and condition. 1.00

00:04:57.000 So am I the asshole? 1.00

00:04:57.940 Well, obviously, your coworker and boss are a-holes here. 1.00

00:05:03.040 Is that a thing people actually do?

00:05:04.480 And I hear about this complaint a lot.

00:05:06.280 Like this is apparently, it's a thing.

00:05:08.640 You bring your food in and someone steals it.

00:05:11.240 I can't even...

00:05:12.320 Oh my God.

00:05:13.460 What have we become?

00:05:14.960 Steal someone's lunch from the fridge?

00:05:16.920 That's sociopath behavior.

00:05:18.500 If someone did that to me, 0.99

00:05:19.240 I'd probably, I'd like burn down their house. 1.00

00:05:21.260 Burn it down! 0.99

00:05:22.420 And then to do that when you have a food allergy 1.00

00:05:24.160 is just another level of stupid. 0.99

00:05:27.640 Which is why, like, this is a good lesson here. 1.00

00:05:30.060 If you're an adult...

00:05:31.080 I'm listening.

00:05:32.520 ...with food allergies,

00:05:33.740 that is not something you can impose on other people.

00:05:36.720 I'm sorry you have that problem

00:05:37.740 and it can be a serious problem,

00:05:39.160 but it is yours.

00:05:40.760 Younger kids are different.

00:05:41.680 But with adults,

00:05:42.380 we have this thing with food allergies now

00:05:43.800 where it's like, I'm allergic to peanuts.

00:05:45.900 And so any room I walk into,

00:05:47.800 there should be no peanuts anywhere.

00:05:49.400 I should have a 50-mile radius, peanut-free.

00:05:52.580 It doesn't work that way.

00:05:53.340 You have to figure out,

00:05:54.780 like some of the other problems we can have in life,

00:05:57.020 even when they're legitimate problems.

00:05:58.620 You have to figure out how to navigate life

00:06:00.660 with that problem.

00:06:01.520 That's on you.

00:06:01.980 All that said,

00:06:03.680 the person who wrote this

00:06:05.720 is also, I think,

00:06:07.760 in another way, the a-hole as well.

00:06:10.400 What a twist.

00:06:11.820 Of course, you never steal your co-worker's lunch

00:06:13.460 out of the fridge.

00:06:14.840 But also, you never bring a lunch

00:06:16.600 that has a pungent odor to it.

00:06:21.560 If I'm walking in the break room,

00:06:22.940 why should I have to smell 0.97

00:06:24.060 your disgusting peanut sauce? 0.97

00:06:26.740 So, another situation 0.99

00:06:27.960 where everybody involved is the a-hole.

00:06:31.100 Another one says,

00:06:31.920 my husband and I have been married for six years,

00:06:33.440 still don't have kids.

00:06:34.440 We want them,

00:06:35.080 but it's still not happening.

00:06:36.520 Friends and family are causing us

00:06:38.200 constant stress about having a baby soon,

00:06:40.560 but it's obviously something we can't control.

00:06:42.680 So, what I did was come up with an idea

00:06:44.720 to have an empty jar

00:06:45.940 and call it the pregnancy jar. 0.95

00:06:48.040 I carry it with me in my bag

00:06:49.600 whenever I'm with my friends and family.

00:06:51.140 And every time somebody asks about

00:06:52.420 when my husband and I are going to have a baby,

00:06:54.540 I pull my jar out

00:06:55.680 and ask them to put a dollar in there for asking.

00:06:58.540 What?

00:06:59.060 And they pull out a dollar

00:07:00.000 and they put it inside the jar.

00:07:01.180 They actually do it?

00:07:02.080 It actually worked

00:07:02.740 because most of them stopped asking

00:07:04.500 after about four months.

00:07:06.140 Last week, we had dinner at my parents' house.

00:07:07.740 My brother came back from his business trip

00:07:09.260 that lasted a month

00:07:09.940 and while we were eating,

00:07:10.880 he asked when me and my husband

00:07:12.580 were going to have a kid.

00:07:13.280 With my jar in my hand,

00:07:14.360 I asked him to drop a dollar

00:07:15.560 for the question he asked.

00:07:16.720 I could tell he felt embarrassed,

00:07:17.820 but he immediately reached out of his pocket,

00:07:19.740 pulled out his wallet

00:07:20.300 and put a dollar in the jar.

00:07:22.100 Made me on my way back to my seat

00:07:23.320 and sat down

00:07:24.480 and resumed eating like nothing happened.

00:07:27.160 This is...

00:07:28.600 And everybody in the comments,

00:07:29.660 and I scroll down,

00:07:30.240 everybody in the comments,

00:07:31.180 has somehow declared

00:07:32.320 that this woman is NTA, right? 0.97

00:07:34.560 Not the a**hole. 0.97

00:07:36.000 Somehow.

00:07:37.320 And that is exactly why

00:07:38.780 you don't turn to Reddit

00:07:39.960 for moral enlightenment.

00:07:41.380 That's why you have to turn to me. 1.00

00:07:42.720 Because yes, you are the a**hole. 1.00

00:07:44.540 Every single one so far. 1.00

00:07:45.520 Everyone involved is the a**hole. 0.94

00:07:46.960 If you're actually cooperating with this 0.99

00:07:49.160 and encouraging this behavior,

00:07:50.640 someone puts a jar in front of me

00:07:52.100 and says,

00:07:52.480 this is my pregnancy jar.

00:07:53.380 I put a dollar in it.

00:07:54.140 What?

00:07:54.480 No.

00:07:55.000 Get away from me. 0.77

00:07:56.060 Freak.

00:07:56.420 People ask that question 0.64

00:07:58.540 because they're taking an interest in you

00:08:02.120 and they want to know about your life.

00:08:04.620 We all have certain questions

00:08:06.900 that are asked of us all the time

00:08:09.280 by everybody

00:08:10.000 and that we're annoyed about.

00:08:12.940 But that's the price of living

00:08:14.320 in a human society.

00:08:15.420 Even if it's a little bit weird,

00:08:16.760 it's still people taking an interest in you.

00:08:19.000 And so that is your responsibility

00:08:20.700 to just deal with it

00:08:22.260 and make it less awkward, not more.

00:08:24.340 And that's the other problem

00:08:25.120 is that, okay,

00:08:27.200 somebody asks a question to you

00:08:28.560 and it's a little bit awkward.

00:08:30.940 You don't want to answer it.

00:08:32.560 Well, the objective now

00:08:33.660 should be to neutralize the awkwardness

00:08:35.740 and move on from it

00:08:36.680 as quickly as possible.

00:08:37.600 You've brought everyone else

00:08:38.740 into this awkwardness.

00:08:39.800 I can only imagine sitting there

00:08:40.900 at this dinner table

00:08:41.660 as a guest

00:08:42.700 and watching this whole exchange taking place.

00:08:45.380 How do you move on from that

00:08:46.740 and have a regular conversation?

00:08:50.000 So you're all A-holes.

00:08:51.120 Okay, last one.

00:08:52.260 For some background,

00:08:53.200 my husband and I

00:08:54.320 have been married

00:08:55.020 for a little over a year.

00:08:56.140 We recently bought a nice house.

00:08:57.500 It has a pool and a hot tub

00:08:58.520 and one of the things I've enjoyed

00:08:59.500 is unwinding after a long day.

00:09:01.420 My family has always been

00:09:02.460 very comfortable with nudity

00:09:03.540 so I find it really irritating

00:09:04.980 and completely unnecessary

00:09:06.200 to be told to restrict

00:09:07.240 some perfectly harmless things

00:09:08.740 such as swimming and hot tubbing,

00:09:10.720 nude, topless sunbathing,

00:09:12.480 having to wear a bra

00:09:13.200 whenever guests are over.

00:09:14.420 Nude grilling, hot tubs,

00:09:16.740 hippie houseboats.

00:09:18.000 Now, my husband's old mom

00:09:19.600 who is from a different world.

00:09:21.220 My husband's old mom?

00:09:22.840 Does he have a new mom?

00:09:23.660 There's something different about you.

00:09:25.960 She's a southern lady 1.00

00:09:26.860 who's super prudish

00:09:27.640 and very passive aggressive.

00:09:28.760 He's staying with us for a month.

00:09:29.900 My husband wants me

00:09:30.720 to stop sunbathing,

00:09:31.860 swimming, hot tubbing,

00:09:32.620 topless,

00:09:33.080 and dress up a little bit more

00:09:34.180 when having breakfast and dinner.

00:09:36.140 And by dress up,

00:09:37.040 I think he means like

00:09:37.480 just dress at all.

00:09:38.900 He's not saying dress up,

00:09:39.720 just dress.

00:09:40.460 Put on anything,

00:09:41.200 any kind of clothing at all.

00:09:42.340 We have guests over.

00:09:43.240 Please, honey.

00:09:43.920 I flat out refused.

00:09:45.240 I told her she's a guest in our house

00:09:46.680 and I won't be rude or inappropriate.

00:09:48.380 I'm not going to be rude or inappropriate,

00:09:49.560 but I will walk around nude. 0.99

00:09:51.040 Am I the a**hole here? 1.00

00:09:52.920 Are you the a**hole? 0.99

00:09:55.100 Yes, you are. 1.00

00:09:56.800 And you're also showing it off

00:09:59.080 to everybody in the house,

00:09:59.920 which is a good indication

00:10:01.440 that you are one.

00:10:02.760 That's a rule of thumb. 0.99

00:10:03.900 If you're showing your a**hole to people, 0.99

00:10:05.440 then you are one. 0.99

00:10:06.340 Like that's,

00:10:06.720 I think we could kind of take that,

00:10:07.960 put that on a bumper sticker.

00:10:09.000 That's words to live by.

00:10:10.060 A lot of entitled people

00:10:11.040 and it's a common theme.

00:10:13.140 Now, maybe all these entitled people

00:10:14.020 don't walk around naked in their house 0.57

00:10:15.160 and maybe they do,

00:10:16.180 but there's this thing people do

00:10:17.820 where they expect every accommodation

00:10:19.540 to be made for them,

00:10:21.180 but if they are ever expected

00:10:22.760 to make any accommodation

00:10:23.660 for anybody else,

00:10:24.800 it's oppression.

00:10:25.680 So that's the way she's living her life.

00:10:27.840 Everyone has to accommodate to her, 0.95

00:10:29.400 but even being asked

00:10:30.560 to simply put on clothing

00:10:32.080 when my mother is here,

00:10:34.500 she can't do that.

00:10:35.360 In conclusion,

00:10:36.180 put some clothes on,

00:10:37.060 you freak.

00:10:37.820 That's my message to this person

00:10:39.120 and indeed to the whole world.

00:10:40.560 A world which is

00:10:41.540 very much in need of it,

00:10:43.460 I think.

00:10:44.240 Put some clothes on!

00:10:46.620 Well, a lot of a-holes 0.92

00:10:47.840 of various different kinds

00:10:49.260 flying around in that segment.

00:10:50.780 If you don't want to be

00:10:52.020 an a-hole yourself, 0.91

00:10:53.220 then what you need to do

00:10:54.600 right now,

00:10:55.280 this moment,

00:10:56.140 is hit the like button,

00:10:59.060 hit the subscribe button,

00:11:00.720 and what else?

00:11:02.200 Hit the notification bell

00:11:03.140 so you don't miss

00:11:03.700 any more content

00:11:04.480 just like this.

The Matt Walsh Show - July 05, 2022

Am I The A＊＊hole？ Matt Walsh Decides - Part 5

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