The Matt Walsh Show - August 09, 2024


Ep. 1419 - The UK's Orwellian Crackdown On Free Speech Could Be Headed Our Way


Episode Stats

Length

1 hour

Words per Minute

169.1892

Word Count

10,288

Sentence Count

743

Misogynist Sentences

25

Hate Speech Sentences

28


Summary


Transcript

00:00:00.000 Today on the Matt Wall Show, the UK is in the midst of a full-scale crackdown on free speech.
00:00:04.520 The US might be next. We'll talk about it. Also, unmarried women are more liberal than
00:00:08.560 they've ever been as the political gender divide grows deeper. Why is that happening,
00:00:12.540 and what can we do about it? Cori Bush lashes out in a typically unhinged way after losing
00:00:16.880 her primary. I'm venturing into one of the darkest and most depressing corners of the
00:00:20.780 internet to see if maybe I can shed a little bit of light there. We'll talk about all that
00:00:24.540 and more today on the Matt Wall Show.
00:00:30.000 We'll be right back.
00:01:00.000 Join us and the fight right now. Dailywire.com slash subscribe.
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00:02:00.860 to 989898 today. When several children were stabbed to death while attending a Taylor Swift-themed
00:02:07.260 dance class in the UK late last month, British politicians and media outlets immediately went
00:02:11.600 to great lengths to absolve themselves of any responsibility. They declared that decades of
00:02:16.100 unrestricted mass migration couldn't possibly be the reason that three young girls were dead and
00:02:20.880 many more were critically injured. The fact that the alleged killer was born in Britain to
00:02:25.260 Rwandan parents who somehow ended up in Britain, the government insisted, was completely irrelevant.
00:02:29.860 Only far-right extremists would say otherwise. As I outlined earlier this week, British politicians
00:02:34.420 threatened to arrest those far-right extremists for hate speech and misinformation. As protests
00:02:40.480 and riots broke out all over the country, the government promised to punish anyone who suggested
00:02:44.820 that maybe open borders were a bad idea. But the problem with punishing wrong think is that
00:02:49.920 it does nothing to address the underlying problem. You can throw every single right-wing
00:02:54.180 commentator in the Tower of London for saying that mass migration has deadly consequences
00:02:58.140 and they'll still be right. And children will continue to be targeted because of the barbaric
00:03:03.260 ideology that Europe's leaders have deliberately imported from the Third World. As if to prove that
00:03:09.220 point on Wednesday, authorities in Vienna arrested two suspects who were planning a terrorist attack at
00:03:14.820 Taylor Swift's concerts that were originally scheduled for this weekend. Concerts have been canceled,
00:03:19.600 apparently because the threat remains high. One of the suspects is reportedly 19 years old and pledged
00:03:24.880 allegiance to ISIS. The police are apparently looking for at least one additional suspect.
00:03:30.240 Bomb-making materials are involved. And beyond that, we're not sure exactly who these suspects are at
00:03:35.560 the moment because the authorities won't say. Watch. We have some breaking news for you. Austrian police say they
00:03:42.120 have arrested two people suspected of planning an attack at a Taylor Swift concert in Vienna, Austria.
00:03:48.200 Officials say a 19-year-old suspect made, quote, concrete preparatory acts for a terrorist attack.
00:03:54.920 Swift has concerts scheduled in Vienna Thursday, Friday and Saturday night.
00:03:58.920 You know, according to German police, at least one of the suspects was a 19-year-old who was radicalized
00:04:04.840 and joined ISIS via the internet. And when they took him into custody, they found substances of chemicals
00:04:12.600 that could possibly be used to make bombs. However, that is something that they're looking into.
00:04:18.920 Vienna has a track record of being something of a breeding ground, or at least it has a track record of
00:04:25.480 of having inspired young people to join ISIS, even go and join the Islamic State.
00:04:31.720 So, according to that report, Vienna now has a track record of being a breeding ground for the
00:04:37.000 Islamic State. What's not stated in that news report is what could possibly explain this troubling rise
00:04:43.160 in terrorist incidents in a place like Austria. It is a country that used to be known as the birthplace
00:04:49.240 of classical music and strong coffee, and now they're a breeding ground for ISIS? How did that happen?
00:04:56.440 What got into all these Austrians? It's a mystery wrapped in an enigma. What's unstated, of course,
00:05:03.560 in that report is that an awful lot of foreign nationals have poured into Austria over the past
00:05:08.040 few decades from countries like Montenegro, Afghanistan, Iraq, Syria, Chechnya, Turkey, Somalia.
00:05:15.800 And some of these immigrants are doing things that Austrians don't generally do.
00:05:20.360 Just a few months ago, for example, a 14-year-old ISIS sympathizer from Montenegro was arrested in
00:05:25.080 Austria with a knife and an axe that she allegedly planned to use in a terrorist attack. How did a
00:05:29.800 14-year-old terrorist from Montenegro get into Austria? Well, who knows? The media doesn't care.
00:05:37.080 Reporters aren't even allowed to bring up any of this immigration stuff because it might lead people
00:05:42.120 to conclude that more immigration isn't always a good thing, that maybe immigration isn't always an
00:05:47.480 enriching thing for a country. In fact, in the UK, even suggesting that maybe immigration isn't
00:05:55.880 always great can now land you in prison. Here's England's director of public prosecutions, a guy
00:06:02.120 named Steven Parkinson. And he wants Britons to know that if they so much as retweet anything that
00:06:08.120 insults the foreign nationals who are living illegally in their country, then the full force of the law will
00:06:13.560 descend on them. Watch. The offence of incitement to racial hatred involves publishing or distributing
00:06:20.520 material which is insulting or abusive, which is intended to or likely to start racial hatred.
00:06:29.880 So if you retweet that, then you're republishing that and then potentially you're committing that
00:06:34.040 offence. And we do have dedicated police officers who are scouring social media. Their job is to look
00:06:41.080 for this material and then follow up with identification arrests and so forth. So it's a really,
00:06:47.560 really serious. People might think they're not doing anything harmful. They are. And the consequences
00:06:54.840 will be visited upon them. Consequences will be visited upon them. So, you know, you've got children
00:07:00.920 being stabbed to death. And, but what they're worried about, they have a dedicated police officer
00:07:08.280 scouring, scouring social media to find mean comments about immigrants.
00:07:16.920 Now, aside from the accent and the language, it's a clip that might as well be from North Korea.
00:07:22.120 Instead of having teams of police officers deporting some of the illegal aliens who are living in Britain,
00:07:26.840 which would actually accomplish something productive, the British government is spending its time
00:07:30.200 scouring Twitter looking for retweets they don't like. And apparently, even if you write like,
00:07:36.680 RTs are not endorsements in your bio, you're not going to be spared. If you retweet something that
00:07:42.280 Keir Starmer thinks is naughty, you'll go to prison. The consequences will be visited upon you.
00:07:49.240 Now, of course, Steven Parkinson left the standard vague on purpose so that no one knows where the line
00:07:54.280 is exactly. Take this quote from the New York Times, for example. More British Muslims,
00:07:59.640 more British Muslim men have joined ISIS and the Nusra Front than are serving in the British armed
00:08:04.440 forces. We mentioned that yesterday on the show. But would a statement like that qualify as inciting
00:08:11.000 racial hatred? It happens to be a factually true statement, as unbelievable and incredible as it may seem,
00:08:16.920 that there are more Muslims, more British Muslims that are interested in joining terrorist groups
00:08:23.400 than fighting for the British armed forces. But are you allowed to at least point that out? What if
00:08:30.200 you point it out and don't even comment on it? What if you make, what if you offer no commentary,
00:08:33.240 you just say, here's a thing that's happening? Well, that might be against the law now because it may
00:08:40.040 lead people to conclude that Britain's immigration policy isn't the best. So maybe you can't retweet that or
00:08:45.640 say it. Nobody knows. It's a completely subjective standard that's clearly designed to terrify people
00:08:50.280 into submission. They don't want to make people afraid to, they want to make people, well, they don't
00:08:55.240 just want to make people afraid to speak their mind. They also want to make people afraid to
00:08:58.680 agree with someone else who speaks their mind. So it's about terrifying you into silence. And also
00:09:06.040 part of terrifying you into silence is letting you know that you'll be isolated. That if you go out on
00:09:11.700 a limb and you say something that the authorities don't like, not only are they going to come after
00:09:17.460 you, but other people are not allowed to even agree with you or amplify what you said. So you're
00:09:23.620 going to be alone on an island. That's the idea. They're going several layers deep in order to censor
00:09:29.460 dissent as all illegitimate regimes do. Pretty soon they'll be rounding up the family members of anyone
00:09:36.100 who likes a tweet criticizing Keir Starmer. Now, if this were happening in any other third world
00:09:41.580 country, the State Department would immediately condemn this as a flagrant abuse of human rights.
00:09:46.880 The UN Security Council would hold a meeting. We might even invade so that we can spread freedom
00:09:51.900 and democracy. We'd find like rebel groups that want to take over the government. We'd give them
00:09:57.680 money and guns to do it. But because Britain is a supposedly already a first world country,
00:10:03.360 and also because they sit on the Security Council, no one says anything. Britain, like Canada,
00:10:09.040 has descended very sharply and very quickly into totalitarianism. The government can tolerate
00:10:14.700 the murder of children. It can't tolerate criticism or even retweets of criticism.
00:10:20.120 The rapid collapse of both Britain and Canada raises the obvious question of whether and when
00:10:25.460 a similar collapse might happen here. And there's one clear indication that it might come sooner than
00:10:30.600 we think. Yesterday, I spoke at length about Tim Walls, who's repeatedly lied about his military
00:10:34.340 service record. His lies have been exposed, for the most part, because of free and open discussion
00:10:39.460 on social media. And there's no doubt that if he gets into the White House, Tim Walls will do
00:10:44.080 everything he can to shut down those discussions. He said as much in 2022 during an interview with MSNBC.
00:10:51.280 Listen.
00:10:51.880 I think we need to push back on this. There's no guarantee to free speech on misinformation or
00:10:57.040 hate speech, and especially around our democracy.
00:11:00.400 There's no guarantee to free speech on misinformation or hate speech, and especially around our democracy.
00:11:06.900 Well, that line by itself should have disqualified Tim Walls from getting anywhere near the vice
00:11:11.040 presidential shortlist. It should have disqualified him from continuing to serve in the government of
00:11:15.800 Minnesota in any capacity. In a serious country, he would be impeached and removed from office
00:11:21.580 for saying that. But Tim Walls was not impeached. He didn't suffer any consequences whatsoever. He was
00:11:27.840 barely even criticized. On some corners of the internet, people reacted to that footage by,
00:11:33.160 you know, saying that Tim Walls must have failed high school civics, that sort of thing. But
00:11:38.580 that's actually not what the clip shows. We can assume that Tim Walls knows that the First Amendment
00:11:44.780 protects misinformation and hate speech and even criticisms of democracy, whatever those things mean.
00:11:50.380 Which, by the way, if you're saying the First Amendment does not protect your right to
00:11:56.920 engage in hate speech against democracy, what does that mean? He means the government.
00:12:04.780 So he just pretty explicitly said that you do not have the First Amendment right to criticize the
00:12:09.180 government. Now, in fact, if the First Amendment does not protect so-called hate speech and so-called
00:12:16.020 misinformation, then it doesn't protect anything. After all, something is labeled misinformation if
00:12:22.580 some people, especially powerful people, claim that it's untrue or inaccurate. And something is
00:12:28.400 labeled hate speech if some people, especially powerful people, claim that it's morally repugnant
00:12:33.080 and offensive. So if the First Amendment does not cover misinformation and hate speech, that means
00:12:38.480 that we're free to say anything we want, as long as it's not something that powerful people consider
00:12:44.060 wrong, inaccurate, offensive, or outrageous. Which is to say we don't have free speech or anything
00:12:50.700 approaching free speech. If we only have free speech up to the point when powerful people don't
00:12:55.500 like it, then there's no free speech. Or at the very least, that is a level of free speech that you
00:13:02.620 can find in North Korea or Iran or any of those places. Now, Tim Walls knows this. He's not the
00:13:12.400 smartest guy, but he's smart enough to understand the basic principle here. So the real takeaway then
00:13:18.540 is that he just doesn't care. He understands that the First Amendment is just words on paper.
00:13:24.540 The Soviet Union had a constitution guaranteeing free speech. Canada and the UK have charters that
00:13:30.700 supposedly protect freedom of expression. But the constitution and charters, they don't matter if
00:13:35.740 nobody cares about what they say. These are not self-enforcing things. They have to actually be
00:13:42.900 enforced actively. And if they're not, they may as well not exist. This is the trajectory that we're
00:13:49.240 on. A decade ago, nobody in the UK would have thought that the police would ever show up at their door
00:13:54.660 because they retweeted someone else's political commentary. And now that's the reality of living in
00:14:00.200 Britain. The insidious thing about this kind of censorship is that by the time it takes hold,
00:14:06.100 it's too late to actually do anything about it. Protesters inevitably turn to violence, which in
00:14:11.480 turn leads to more censorship and more crackdowns. This is the cycle that leads to a country so unstable
00:14:17.520 and so dangerous that it can't even host a Taylor Swift concert anymore. So reasonable people look to
00:14:24.980 Europe than as a cautionary tale. But people like Tim Walls and Kamala Harris see it as a blueprint.
00:14:33.440 Now let's get to our five headlines.
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00:16:02.520 So The Guardian has a report today, or this week rather, headline,
00:16:07.920 Young Women Are the Most Progressive Group in American History. Young Men Are Checked Out.
00:16:12.560 So this is a dynamic that we're all very familiar with at this point, I think.
00:16:18.860 And this is just the latest sort of report and commentary on it. I'll read a little bit of it.
00:16:24.180 And I have a few points of my own to make about this.
00:16:28.100 When Donald Trump strutted on the stage at the Republican National Convention last month,
00:16:32.160 it was to a raucous cover of James Brown's It's a Man's Man's Man's World. The song credits men
00:16:37.580 with inventing cars, trains, lights, boats, toys, and commerce, which, I mean, we did.
00:16:43.700 The message was not subtle, at least not to Melissa Deckman. Quote,
00:16:47.880 this idea of America needing someone who is a strong, masculine figure, I think the Republican
00:16:51.480 campaign this year is doing it even in a more pronounced and overt way than it did in 2016,
00:16:55.820 said Deckman, CEO of the Public Religion Research Institute.
00:16:59.960 You have a lot of younger men admiring the strength of Trump or what they think is strong.
00:17:03.780 Deckman would know in her forthcoming book, The Politics of Gen Z, How the Youngest Voters
00:17:09.020 Will Shape Our Democracy. She dives into the deep political divides between Gen Z women and men
00:17:13.980 and explores how they feel about growing up in the Trump era. Based on interviews with roughly 90
00:17:19.240 Gen Z political activists, numerous focus groups, and extensive polling, Deckman has identified what
00:17:24.640 she calls a historic reverse gender gap. She's found that Gen Z men are becoming more conservative
00:17:30.060 as well as increasingly indifferent to politics, bucking longstanding trends dating back to at
00:17:34.280 least the 1970s that saw young people across the board voting liberal and men being generally more
00:17:39.400 involved in politics than women. Meanwhile, Gen Z women have not only become the most progressive
00:17:43.740 cohort in the U.S., in U.S. history rather, but are also expected to outpace their male peers across
00:17:49.140 virtually every measure of political involvement, such as donating money, volunteering for campaigns,
00:17:53.760 registering people to vote, and of course, voting. Young women were outstripping men on political
00:17:58.960 engagement well before Joe Biden stepped aside in favor of Kamala Harris. Now with Harris, the presumptive
00:18:03.820 Democratic nominee, a generation already riven by a canyon-wide political gender gap is watching
00:18:08.720 a contest between a woman and blah, blah, blah. So in 2022, 49% of Gen Z men said that the United States
00:18:18.480 had become too soft and feminine, Deckman found. Just a year later, 60% of Gen Z men said the same.
00:18:25.880 So we find that this divide is not only present, but it's growing deeper and deeper. So this is,
00:18:32.420 again, a well-established fact at this point. A lot has been said and written about the political
00:18:37.460 gender divide. Women, unmarried women specifically, and we talk about Gen Z women, you know, of course,
00:18:45.300 there are unmarried women who are older, but so it's not just Gen Z. It's really, as we're talking
00:18:50.140 about unmarried women, are much more likely to be liberal. In fact, Republicans win.
00:18:58.680 When you break down the gender demographics any other way, Republicans win. Republicans win
00:19:03.200 married women. They win married men. They win unmarried men. The only group they don't win
00:19:08.380 are the unmarried women. And they lose that group by like a wide margin.
00:19:13.800 So it's a fascinating and quite troubling trend, which is why it's been discussed so much, for good
00:19:20.840 reason. And there are two questions that immediately arise, of course, which is, why is this the case?
00:19:29.480 Number one. And number two, what do we do about it? Which is more a question of, if you're a
00:19:35.320 conservative or if you're a Republican, what do you do about it? How do you respond to it?
00:19:39.540 Um, the why is a long answer. You know, it's very multifaceted. Everyone has theories about why
00:19:47.940 it's breaking down this way. Some of the theories are good. Many times I think that they're
00:19:52.660 fanciful. Why are women, unmarried women especially, trending so liberal? Well, part of it is that
00:19:59.340 there's a lot. I mean, part of it is that women are naturally more emotional and empathetic.
00:20:05.120 Democrat rhetoric and tactics play on that and exploit that. Um, we know that Democrats rarely
00:20:13.320 argue for a policy by laying out its practical benefits or explaining how it'll make your life
00:20:19.560 better and your community better in some measurable way. They rarely do that unless they're just offering
00:20:25.840 bribes, right? Unless they're just saying, we're going to pay off your student loans. Here's some
00:20:30.060 welfare. Uh, so in that case, they, they will, um, try to appeal, you might say in a more practical way,
00:20:37.500 but aside from bribery, um, they don't spend a lot of time explaining like, here's a policy and no,
00:20:46.380 we're not going to give you money, but when we enact this policy, it's going to actually make your life
00:20:50.780 better. And here's how in, in, in ways that you can see and feel and experience. Uh, they don't spend a
00:20:59.340 lot of time doing that. They make the emotional argument, which is cloaked usually as a moral
00:21:04.500 argument and it's very effective with women. It's less effective with men. Now, also there's the
00:21:12.000 simple fact that Democrats suck up to women and really deify women and celebrate women constantly
00:21:18.380 while demonizing and scapegoating men. That's another part of the story here. Like you're just
00:21:25.320 never going to hear a Democrat politician say the word men or man in an explicitly positive context.
00:21:35.220 You'll never hear it. They'll say it in a neutral context. Sometimes they'll say it in a negative
00:21:41.140 context, talking about the problems with men and what men are doing wrong. You will literally never
00:21:47.960 hear any of them ever say anything positive about men as a group. You will never, ever hear it,
00:21:56.180 which that's the kind of thing that we're so used to it, that you hear that and you,
00:22:00.980 you know, it just kind of bounces off of you. But really think about that. And I,
00:22:08.020 you could go looking for an example to disprove my point, but you can't find it. Like go,
00:22:13.080 go try to find maybe like the last 20 years, go try to find a Democrat politician singling out men
00:22:19.140 specifically in a positive way. Never happens. Never happens. So, um, I mean, that's not the case
00:22:27.200 for women. Women, I mean, women are flattered all the time. And most, most cases, if you hear a
00:22:32.120 Democrat politician say the word woman or women, it will be followed by something complimentary.
00:22:39.220 Um, so women are flattered, men are demoralized. When this article says that men are checked out,
00:22:47.700 that's the point. Like that's the reason behind the demoralization campaign. It's actually not that
00:22:55.900 surprising that you have young men that are checked out. I don't know if they're checked out to the
00:23:01.360 degree that this article in the Guardian claims, but that's, that's the idea. When you're constantly
00:23:08.920 scapegoating and demonizing a certain group and telling this group that you don't care about them,
00:23:13.400 you don't need them, you don't want them, it has a demoralizing effect. So, so there's that as well.
00:23:18.400 And then I think, um, it's also undoubtedly the case that women are more collectivist in a sense.
00:23:26.600 Um, communal would be maybe the less pejorative way of saying it. And, you know, I don't mean it as
00:23:32.600 a pejorative. Women are more group oriented. They are. And this, this has many positive results.
00:23:41.400 Uh, it means that women make friends. They, they stay socially connected. Uh, when they get married,
00:23:49.660 they're the ones who make sure that the family keeps in touch with, um, friends and family and,
00:23:55.120 and is involved in the community and goes out and does like things as a, you know, it goes out and does,
00:24:01.040 there's a community event somewhere. There's a, whatever, a fair or something happening in the
00:24:06.520 community and there are families there. It's like 95% of the families are there because the,
00:24:13.200 the mom insisted that they come. Um, and, uh, and so that's, that's the positive end of,
00:24:20.780 of women being wired that way. There's also the downside. Women and girls can tend to fall more
00:24:25.580 easily into trends and fads, uh, more susceptible to peer pressure, more harmed, uh, mentally by
00:24:34.740 social alienation and ostracization. There's a reason that adolescent girls are so much more
00:24:40.860 likely to be, uh, gender dysphoric, so much more likely to develop eating disorders. Um,
00:24:47.260 there's always like some, some, some, some kind of trend like that, uh, making its way through
00:24:54.540 middle schools and high schools, uh, some kind of self-destructive trend that adolescent girls are
00:24:59.920 getting wrapped up into. And, um, and right now it's gender dysphoria. And, uh, and this relates back
00:25:08.820 to the political question because we live in a progressive society where all of our institutions
00:25:12.560 push progressivism. So women are just more likely to be influenced by that and to care about that.
00:25:21.160 You know, Taylor Swift is liberal and to a lot of our female fans, that matters.
00:25:29.240 They, they, they want to have the same values as Taylor Swift and the other Taylor Swift fans. Like,
00:25:33.920 it's just a fact. Men are not impervious to this, are not impervious to groupthink, obviously, but
00:25:40.820 as men, we tend to have more of a contrarian, more of an antisocial streak to us that can in some
00:25:47.680 context serve us well. It can also cause problems, but in this case, it makes us less susceptible to
00:25:54.600 the kind of groupthink that leads to people becoming green haired wokesters, right? In fact, it's
00:25:59.560 interesting that the article mentions how back in the sixties and seventies, young men were more liberal
00:26:04.840 and more politically involved. And this is seen as kind of a mysterious fact. What happened?
00:26:12.200 Well, I wonder if this, if what I'm talking about here isn't part of the explanation for that. Back 50
00:26:15.820 years ago, it was counter-cultural, it was rebellious, it was contrarian to be liberal. And so, um,
00:26:23.560 you know, more, more young men were attracted to it for partly for that reason. And now it has flipped
00:26:33.340 and so have young men. Now, of course, the problem with my theory is that it probably doesn't hold up
00:26:39.840 if you go back further. I don't think you're going to find historically that young men have always just
00:26:44.740 been like reflexively opposed to the dominant cultural value system. In fact, I'm sure that that
00:26:51.160 isn't the case. So it's not quite as simple as that, I admit. So then you have to, you have to go deeper
00:26:56.380 into the male psyche. Like if men are more likely to be rebellious and contrarian and counter-cultural
00:27:02.560 today, why is that? Why are men attracted to that? I think it might be the danger, you know, kind of the,
00:27:09.880 the fight is what we're, is why we find that's appealing, especially younger men. Well, older societies
00:27:16.920 have had other ways of harnessing that energy. Um, you know, older societies, especially,
00:27:25.140 you know, the farther you go back, I think the more that's the case that you, you know, young men have
00:27:32.400 always had this, this, um, hunger for, for, for danger, for the fight, for adventure.
00:27:41.780 And when you go back into, into, you know, earlier times, there were, um, other ways to kind of
00:27:48.840 naturally harness that in society, not so much now. And so young men look for other outlets.
00:27:56.180 Um, so I think that's part of what's going on here. And there's, there's more to it than that.
00:28:00.120 Even, you know, you could spend hours breaking it down, but the most immediate question is like,
00:28:06.680 okay, this is the case. What, for whatever reason, this is the situation we're facing right now.
00:28:12.560 That unmarried women are very, very liberal, more liberal than they've ever been by a huge margin.
00:28:19.840 And, and they are, and in that way, they're like a sore thumb sticking out from all the other groups,
00:28:26.420 married, unmarried men, married women. That's the fact from a political perspective,
00:28:32.560 what do you do about that right now? And this is why I go back to, you know, I'll keep saying it
00:28:39.760 until I'm blue in the face here, but yeah, long-term as a conservative, you gotta, you gotta find some
00:28:48.100 way to turn this trend around. But right now, especially in this election season, there's
00:28:55.740 nothing we can do about that. Unmarried women, single women are just very liberal and that's it.
00:29:01.220 We're not going to, we're not going to change that in the next three months. It's not going to happen.
00:29:06.980 Which means, now I'm not saying that you give up on single women politically, but
00:29:12.140 in a way you kind of have to, like you can't, you're not going to win them. It's just it.
00:29:17.380 That's, that's done right now. It's not going to happen. So you really don't tailor any of your
00:29:22.240 messaging to this group that you cannot win right now. You want to come up with a 30-year plan so that
00:29:28.500 30 years from now, maybe you can win them? Then yeah, we could talk about that. But right now,
00:29:32.020 that's a 30-year plan. That's not a three-month plan. Right now, you have to look at the groups
00:29:37.040 that are just, you can't win. And, and say, okay, well, like, we're happy to have your vote.
00:29:44.540 Please, please, please, you're welcome to come vote for us, but we're not going to do a whole lot
00:29:49.660 to try to appeal to you specifically because you've made it clear you don't want anything to do with us
00:29:53.720 right now. Okay, have it your way. And then you have to look and mobilize the voters who you know
00:29:59.920 you can attract and you can appeal to. And that's, I mean, look, that's what Kamala's campaign is
00:30:07.360 doing. It's part of the way that they're getting these big rallies and they're creating this, this
00:30:13.780 illusion that she's some sort of political sensation. But they know what their crowd is,
00:30:21.680 they know who they have to mobilize, and that's what they're doing.
00:30:26.080 That's why they had Megan Thee Stallion at a, at a, at a rally. You know, they, that's not going
00:30:33.980 to appeal. Like, if you want to appeal to, let's say, married white men, you're not going to do it
00:30:40.540 with Megan Thee Stallion. But what Kamala's campaign is saying is like, okay, we know we don't have you
00:30:46.040 people. We don't, we don't need you. Married white men, who cares? Like, this is the group we need,
00:30:51.840 and we're going to get them, and we're going to drown you out by getting all these people.
00:30:57.700 And it's a, it's a, say what else, whatever you want about it, but it's a smart political strategy,
00:31:02.200 and it could work. And Republicans need to be doing the same in the reverse.
00:31:07.900 They need to be saying, okay, like, we're not going to, you know, unmarried single women,
00:31:13.780 Gen Z women, not going to get them. What can we do? How can we, okay, there's a lot of, a lot of
00:31:19.280 disaffected single and married men. What can we do to appeal to them specifically, and directly,
00:31:28.360 and explicitly, and try to mobilize them to get into this thing, and get excited about it?
00:31:33.440 And I think that there's some of that happening, but not nearly enough. Okay, Cori Bush, as mentioned
00:31:41.020 a few days ago, lost her primary. She'll be gone from Congress, and it's a humiliation that could
00:31:47.200 not have happened to a more deserving person, I think we could say. But Cori Bush was not happy
00:31:51.800 about losing, understandably not happy about it, and that led to an interesting concession speech.
00:31:57.340 Let's listen to it. Pulling me away from my position as Congresswoman.
00:32:08.640 All you did was take some of the strings off.
00:32:11.400 Let's be clear! Let's be clear! Let's be clear! Let's be clear! Let's be clear! Let's
00:32:24.780 be clear! Let's be clear! Let's
00:32:32.460 Let's be clear! Let's be clear! Let's talk about what it really is.
00:32:41.460 Because see now I don't have to worry about some strings that I have attached to it as much as I love my job.
00:32:48.460 But all they did was radicalize me and so now they need to be afraid.
00:33:02.460 See now they about to see this other Corey, this other side, because let me say this.
00:33:13.460 I just grew up a whole lot more over the last few weeks.
00:33:18.460 Just grew up a whole different way and so what they are about to get, they think.
00:33:25.460 So the thing is this, the thing is this, I don't, I don't think that anything, there is nothing that happens in my life that happens in vain.
00:33:43.460 So this happened, it's because it was meant to happen and let me say, it's because the work that I need to do and let me say this.
00:33:53.460 Shut up, Corey.
00:33:56.460 So, first of all, no one, no one's afraid of you.
00:34:02.460 I'm radicalized now, now I'm, you have no power anymore.
00:34:06.460 You're not, you're not in Congress anymore.
00:34:07.460 You have no influence.
00:34:09.460 Nobody cares what Cori Bush thinks.
00:34:11.460 So you're, you're just done, like you're done.
00:34:15.460 A few other things to notice here, and this is just a, just a small thing to note, but you, you heard her get stuck in this kind of vocal loop,
00:34:22.460 or she repeats, let's be clear, like ten times.
00:34:25.460 And I've noticed that that's, that's one of the hallmarks of a low IQ person.
00:34:28.460 I'm just, you know, just an interesting side note.
00:34:31.460 Not sure, quite sure how to explain it, but the next time you're around a very dumb person who's angry about something,
00:34:39.460 notice how they tend to get upset and they, they ramble and shout and then they get stuck on like a certain word or phrase they'll repeat over and over again.
00:34:46.460 A more intelligent person, someone with an internal monologue and like the capacity for introspection, will have more of a progression of thoughts.
00:34:54.460 One statement leads to the next.
00:34:57.460 But dumb people like Cori Bush, this is what they sound like.
00:35:00.460 It's also interesting that she kept saying that the strings are off, which is an interesting thing to say.
00:35:09.460 So are you admitting that, what do you mean the strings are off?
00:35:12.460 Are you, what, are you admitting you were a puppet before?
00:35:15.460 Is that the, is that the, what do you mean, like is that, so that brings to mind the image of like a marionette.
00:35:21.460 So you're saying you were a puppet before and now you're no longer a puppet.
00:35:26.460 Now you're a real boy like Pinocchio.
00:35:29.460 Why did you have strings when you were in Congress?
00:35:33.460 Like that tells us something about, I don't, I don't have any doubt that she had strings in Congress, but what does that say about her?
00:35:40.460 But really the, the thing you notice about, about this is, and people are focused on the fact that she, she went on to attack AIPAC and all of that.
00:35:52.460 But the real issue is how self-centered and self-focused she sounds.
00:35:59.460 This is all about her.
00:36:00.460 Right.
00:36:01.460 And usually in a concession speech, if you could even call it a concession speech, but usually in a concession speech and, and yeah, it's, it's, it's phony, but the, the losing candidate will say things like, but yeah, this isn't about me.
00:36:19.460 It's about all of you where we're still in this fight together.
00:36:22.460 Um, I couldn't have done this without any of you and all this, like he's, the, the candidate will bring it back to the people and pretend that that's what she's really concerned about.
00:36:35.460 But for Cori Bush, it's just all about her.
00:36:40.460 See, I mean, that's a 90 second clip.
00:36:43.460 How many times did the words I and me come up in that clip?
00:36:48.460 Probably like 20 times.
00:36:50.460 And this is the problem that we have, you know, there, there are many Cori Bushes in Congress that are, um, not just exceedingly stupid, although she is, but intensely focused on themselves.
00:37:06.460 And so dumb that they can't even pretend otherwise at this point.
00:37:10.460 That's the kind of people we have representing us.
00:37:13.460 Remember the incredible film, what is a woman?
00:37:15.460 Well, I got the same group of white guys back together to ask America's next burning question.
00:37:20.460 Am I racist?
00:37:21.460 It's coming to theaters this September.
00:37:22.460 I went deep undercover into cesspool of DEI insanity.
00:37:25.460 I rubbed elbows with professional race hustlers and diversity con artists.
00:37:29.460 Some would say, uh, I did the work and now it's your turn.
00:37:32.460 But the date I need you to remember right now is Thursday, August 15th.
00:37:36.460 That's when pre-sale tickets go on sale.
00:37:38.460 With your help, we're going to stick it to the woke mob one ticket at a time.
00:37:41.460 Get all the details and watch the official trailer at miracist.com.
00:37:45.460 Now let's get to our daily cancellation.
00:37:53.460 You know, sometimes on this show, I like to read questions and quandaries from the clueless souls on the internet, especially Reddit, and try my best to provide them with a little bit of guidance.
00:38:03.460 And that was a plan, the plan that I had for this segment.
00:38:06.460 But then my producer, McKenna, suggested that, um, for these purposes, I go to the subreddit called Regretful Parents to find some fodder for the segment.
00:38:15.460 And, uh, I did as she recommended.
00:38:18.460 And I can report that it is one of the most depressing places I've ever encountered on the internet, which is obviously saying a lot.
00:38:25.460 This is a forum, as the name suggests, of parents who regret becoming parents.
00:38:30.460 Just post after post after post of parents who view their children as nothing but a burden.
00:38:35.460 Talk about their kids like a person might talk about head lice or tapeworms.
00:38:39.460 Their children are parasites in their eyes.
00:38:41.460 This doesn't appear to be the attitude of every person who posts on the forum, some of whom are dealing with truly tragic personal situations.
00:38:48.460 But it is the attitude of some of them, probably most of them.
00:38:52.460 So at first I was, you know, I read all this and I thought, well, and I spent way too much, I went down a kind of a doom spiral of reading all these posts on this forum.
00:39:02.460 And, uh, I thought, well, I'm not going to attempt to talk about this on the show.
00:39:07.460 It's just, it's so bleak and so horrific.
00:39:11.460 But then I decided that maybe I might have a useful thing or two to say to these people.
00:39:15.460 After all, there's a reason why this is such a popular and active forum.
00:39:19.460 Sadly, a sizable number of parents feel this way.
00:39:22.460 We like to think that, well, no one ever regrets having kids.
00:39:26.460 Actually, they do sometimes.
00:39:29.460 And when that happens, it is a terrible thing.
00:39:32.460 Terrible for the kids, most importantly.
00:39:34.460 And it's enough of a problem.
00:39:37.460 And I would guess, anecdotally, just a growing problem in this country that it's certainly worth addressing.
00:39:43.460 So this isn't really going to be a daily cancellation.
00:39:45.460 The subject itself doesn't quite lend itself to that.
00:39:48.460 So the cancellation is canceled just for today so that we could talk about this.
00:39:53.460 I'm going to start by reading a few of the posts or snippets of posts on this forum.
00:39:59.460 And then I want to offer a few thoughts.
00:40:01.460 So here we go.
00:40:04.460 One post says,
00:40:06.460 Another says,
00:40:13.460 Another says,
00:40:26.460 Someone else says,
00:40:41.460 If I only knew that this subreddit existed, I probably could have avoided the biggest regret of my life, which is becoming a mother.
00:40:53.460 I feel so tied up.
00:40:54.460 I want to get education.
00:40:55.460 I want to work and travel.
00:40:56.460 I want to live again and fall in love with life again.
00:40:58.460 I used to travel a lot back in my early twenties.
00:41:01.460 I always took part in some exchange programs in Europe and got to see a lot.
00:41:05.460 I met amazing people.
00:41:06.460 My son's about to be three and I'm just not having it.
00:41:08.460 I've been contemplating just leaving them and starting my life somewhere else.
00:41:12.460 Another one says,
00:41:14.460 Then things get even darker.
00:41:17.460 Bedtime is only hours away.
00:41:18.460 Bedtime is only hours away in my head.
00:41:20.460 When it's past bedtime and they're still up, and they're still up my ass, I tend to lose my shit.
00:41:25.460 It's like, I put up with them all day.
00:41:27.460 Now can I please have some relief?
00:41:29.460 If I had known autism apparently runs in my family, I honestly wouldn't have had kids at all.
00:41:33.460 It's an energy and happiness suck.
00:41:36.460 Nothing but misery and regret as far as the eye can see.
00:41:39.460 Then things get even darker, if you can believe it.
00:41:44.460 Another post says,
00:41:45.460 I hate my children, both of them.
00:41:47.460 They're two in one and I hate every single second they're awake.
00:41:50.460 I can't sleep peacefully.
00:41:51.460 I can't eat.
00:41:52.460 I can't even take a shit peacefully.
00:41:53.460 I'm tired of this life.
00:41:54.460 I'm the only one with them 24-7.
00:41:56.460 I'm so sick of it.
00:41:57.460 My partner is useless.
00:41:59.460 All he says is they're babies and something's wrong with me.
00:42:02.460 How could I dislike my own children?
00:42:04.460 I haven't had one happy day in two damn years.
00:42:06.460 Specifically my oldest.
00:42:08.460 My daughter, every single thing she does, pisses me off.
00:42:10.460 I'm constantly stressed, constantly screaming for her to stop touching things.
00:42:13.460 I'm so tired of this.
00:42:14.460 Oh my God, I wish I could turn back time and not have any of them.
00:42:17.460 I wish I had never met their father.
00:42:20.460 In a similar vein, someone says,
00:42:22.460 My daughter just turned five and I was already regretful about having her and having no love for her.
00:42:26.460 We treat her well and I say I love her and all that jazz.
00:42:29.460 To not mess up her childhood, but maybe.
00:42:32.460 But she has now been diagnosed with selective mutism,
00:42:34.460 which is a type of anxiety disorder where she can't speak in public or to anyone outside her immediate family.
00:42:39.460 Her teacher says she doesn't speak a word at school and her peers keep asking her why she doesn't talk.
00:42:44.460 I already hated life as a parent.
00:42:46.460 Now I have to deal with psychologist appointments.
00:42:48.460 What a joke of a life I've gotten myself into.
00:42:51.460 And someone with an older kid says that my son is 11 and I still regret it every day.
00:42:59.460 He's boring, annoying, rude.
00:43:00.460 I can't stand to be around him.
00:43:02.460 I just want to live my life alone with friends.
00:43:04.460 I'm counting down the days when he finally leaves my home.
00:43:07.460 If I could afford boarding school, I would.
00:43:09.460 It's school holidays, so this week I'm taking him to a water park, then football practice, then an air show.
00:43:14.460 None of those things I personally enjoy.
00:43:16.460 Only seven years to go and he's out of my house for good.
00:43:19.460 These have mostly been mothers so far with these posts, but also some dads are on the forum.
00:43:26.460 I'll read one of those just to be egalitarian about it.
00:43:30.460 Just day after day after day and it never ends and it never changes.
00:43:34.460 Incessant bickering, screaming, slapping, kicking, biting, fighting over every possible tiny little thing.
00:43:41.460 When all my attempts for diplomacy fail and I finally snap and yell at them to stop,
00:43:45.460 I act absolutely shocked and hurt by how mean dad is and it works.
00:43:48.460 I end up feeling terrible and apologizing to them and on and on and on it goes.
00:43:51.460 My brain and nerves are completely shot.
00:43:53.460 I don't understand how they seem to thrive in that level of dysfunction.
00:43:56.460 I know kids are dramatic and all, but I know I was never like that as a kid.
00:44:00.460 It's bonkers.
00:44:02.460 Okay, so a lot of frustration there to put it mildly.
00:44:08.460 And I understand parenting frustration.
00:44:11.460 I don't understand hating your kid or most of what we just read there, but frustration, sure.
00:44:19.460 When you have, as we did, two sets of twins, six kids total, you experience frustration.
00:44:25.460 Our last set of twins were both colicky as infants.
00:44:29.460 And if you know anything about colic in an infant, you know that, well, we dealt with about six months of constant crying morning, noon and night from two babies while also having four other kids to take care of.
00:44:42.460 And this was not that long ago. This was a year and a half ago.
00:44:46.460 So I'm not saying that that's the hardest parenting experience anyone's ever had, but it's definitely not entry level stuff that we were dealing with.
00:44:52.460 So I've been in the trenches is what I'm saying.
00:44:55.460 And therefore, I think I have some credibility to say the things that I'm going to say to all of these people and anyone who might find themselves relating to what I just read.
00:45:04.460 And some of what I'm going to say will sound harsh. It will certainly not sound like anything that your therapist will probably tell you.
00:45:12.460 And it's also not likely what your friends and family will say to you or have said to you.
00:45:17.460 But I'm going to say it because I think it needs to be said and it needs to be said for your sake and more importantly, for the sake of your children.
00:45:25.460 So three points, three pieces of advice. First, you know, a lot of parents who feel this level of anger and despair to the point of actually regretting having kids.
00:45:37.460 It's at least partly because their kids are out of control and totally unruly.
00:45:42.460 That's not what's happening in all of these cases, but in some of them, in particular, that last one that I read, the kids are running the house, bouncing off the walls, ruling the roost.
00:45:51.460 And and you're at wit's end. Well, here's the good news about that.
00:45:57.460 And it will sound like bad news, but it's actually good news is that it's your fault.
00:46:02.460 It's totally your fault. You are 100 percent to blame.
00:46:06.460 Your kids are out of control because you are out of control.
00:46:09.460 And I don't mean that you're yelling and screaming and losing your temper, though you might be.
00:46:14.460 But even when you have your temper in check, you're still being ruled by your emotions.
00:46:18.460 You are, I'm going to assume, angry, sullen, visibly overwhelmed, overcome by frustration and so on and so on.
00:46:29.460 And then maybe giving yourself credit because although you feel that way and you're coming off that way, at least you're not yelling.
00:46:36.460 Well, the problem is that your kids pick up on that. They see it.
00:46:40.460 And it's not just that they're imitating your lack of emotional regulation, though they are.
00:46:45.460 More importantly, they see that you are projecting a lack of control, a loss of command.
00:46:51.460 And they lose respect for you and your rules as a result.
00:46:56.460 And that's natural. When a leader seems flustered, his followers become disturbed.
00:47:01.460 And if this state of being flustered continues or happens over and over again, eventually they lose faith in his ability to lead.
00:47:09.460 People listening to my show know that I'm kind of a nerd about reading stories of explorers.
00:47:14.460 And sometimes in these stories, something that happens are mutinies.
00:47:22.460 And very often a mutiny happens because you've got a ship full of men in some uncharted part of the world.
00:47:29.460 And if the men on the ship, whose lives depend on the captain, if they perceive that the captain doesn't know what he's doing,
00:47:37.460 is afraid, is frustrated, indecisive, overwhelmed by the responsibility that he has taken on.
00:47:46.460 And if the men on the ship notice that, if they perceive it, they lose faith in his leadership.
00:47:53.460 And then there's a mutiny.
00:47:55.460 So what's happening in some of these households is your kids, it's a mutiny.
00:47:59.460 They're staging a mutiny, although their reasons behind it are mostly unconscious, for the kids anyway.
00:48:06.460 Now what makes this good news is that it's very fixable.
00:48:10.460 All you have to do is put on a convincing front.
00:48:13.460 Fake it till you make it, as some very wise philosopher once said.
00:48:17.460 Project the appearance of being in control, of being in command, of being unbothered, of being unflustered, happy, good-humored.
00:48:25.460 You don't have to feel that way.
00:48:27.460 Just pretend that you feel that way.
00:48:30.460 And yes, it is a virtue to fake it in those cases.
00:48:33.460 This idea that we should never, you know, we need to be true to ourselves and be honest about our emotions.
00:48:39.460 No, you shouldn't be.
00:48:40.460 In fact, you should be, you should not be honest about your emotions most of the time.
00:48:46.460 Like most of what you're feeling should not be known to the people around you.
00:48:52.460 And especially when you're a parent.
00:48:55.460 Just pretend.
00:48:56.460 And you combine that attitude, or the appearance of that attitude, with consistent guidelines, clear rules, and clear consequences for breaking the rules.
00:49:04.460 And you'll no longer have this level of dysfunction in your home.
00:49:08.460 Your children will not be in a constant state of war with each other and you.
00:49:11.460 And you may be able to enjoy their company and your own life as a consequence.
00:49:17.460 Second, happiness is a matter of focus.
00:49:23.460 Happy people focus on the aspects of things that make them happy.
00:49:27.460 Unhappy people focus on the aspects that make them unhappy.
00:49:31.460 That seems so basic that it doesn't even need to be said, but it's a basic thing that we often lose sight of.
00:49:36.460 And this especially applies to parenting.
00:49:39.460 If you're an unhappy parent, it's because you're choosing to focus on all of the things that you want to do, but can't because you have kids.
00:49:47.460 And the things that you have to do, but don't want to do.
00:49:50.460 For the people who wrote these laments that I just read, this focus for them has become obsessive.
00:49:57.460 All they can think about is the stuff they don't want to have to do, but they have to do.
00:50:03.460 And the stuff that they would prefer to do, but they can't do.
00:50:06.460 And so they're just whining all the time in their heads and now on Reddit.
00:50:11.460 You don't want to do this. I don't want to do it anymore. This is hard.
00:50:14.460 I don't want to have to do these things. I want to travel.
00:50:17.460 Look, it's a choice that you have made to focus your attention on those things.
00:50:24.460 There are so many things in life you could focus on, and you decided to focus on the fact that you can't travel to Europe or whatever.
00:50:31.460 So your unhappiness is a choice.
00:50:34.460 You've decided to be miserable and wallow in your misery.
00:50:38.460 And you could stay there forever, wallowing in it if you want.
00:50:42.460 Plenty of people do.
00:50:44.460 And then you'll be unhappy and miserable your whole life.
00:50:47.460 In the process, you'll alienate everybody around you.
00:50:50.460 Your kids will grow to resent you and want nothing to do with you.
00:50:54.460 And then they'll get older and they'll be adults and they won't be as difficult anymore.
00:50:58.460 And you're going to want to have a relationship with them at that point because it's easy now because they're out of the house.
00:51:04.460 And they're going to have grandkids and you're going to want to see the grandkids because grandkids are easy.
00:51:10.460 But your kids are not going to want to have that relationship.
00:51:13.460 And you're going to spend the rest of your life feeling victimized.
00:51:16.460 Oh, my kids ignore me. They don't come over. They don't bring the grandkids over.
00:51:19.460 Why should they?
00:51:21.460 You were awful to them.
00:51:23.460 You did the bare minimum their whole childhood.
00:51:26.460 You put no effort in.
00:51:27.460 Like you fed them and clothed them. You have to do that.
00:51:31.460 But you had a bad attitude about it the entire time.
00:51:34.460 You made the home just an excruciating environment for them to live in.
00:51:39.460 You spent the whole time whining.
00:51:41.460 Why the hell would they want a relationship with you?
00:51:43.460 A relationship with who?
00:51:44.460 There's no relationship here.
00:51:46.460 Sorry.
00:51:48.460 Your chance to build that is over.
00:51:50.460 Guess what?
00:51:52.460 So that's how it can go if you choose that.
00:51:55.460 The only person who can choose otherwise is you.
00:51:59.460 The only person who can fix the problem is you.
00:52:02.460 Nobody else can.
00:52:04.460 Your kids certainly can't.
00:52:07.460 Now, I've never felt like I regretted being a parent.
00:52:10.460 Nor have I ever had feelings of hatred towards my children, for God's sake.
00:52:14.460 But I have experienced anger, frustration, sadness as a parent.
00:52:19.460 I have thrown plenty of pity parties for myself, like any parent does.
00:52:24.460 Because my parenting duties require me to do stuff I don't want to do.
00:52:28.460 And don't allow me to do the stuff that I do want to do.
00:52:31.460 So I get that.
00:52:32.460 Like, I've been there.
00:52:34.460 And I've found that the way out of it is pretty simple.
00:52:38.460 It's just about redirecting my attention.
00:52:40.460 I can choose to redirect it or not.
00:52:42.460 It really is up to me.
00:52:43.460 So here's a relatable example.
00:52:45.460 One that is, you know, millions of parents encounter something like this every day.
00:52:50.460 So I get home from work most days around 5.30 or 6.
00:52:54.460 And contrary to popular opinion, I actually work long days.
00:52:58.460 And I work hard, believe it or not.
00:53:00.460 Media is a stressful gig, if you can believe it.
00:53:04.460 And then I sit in traffic for 45 minutes.
00:53:07.460 You know, it's not that bad.
00:53:08.460 A lot of people sit in traffic for longer, but still, 45 minutes in traffic.
00:53:12.460 And then I come home to a house full of kids who are talkative and needy and wanting my attention.
00:53:21.460 So every time I walk in the door every day, I have a choice to make.
00:53:26.460 And it's a very distinct choice.
00:53:28.460 It's so distinct that it may as well be two different doors I'm walking in.
00:53:33.460 There's the happy door or the annoyed, overwhelmed, sad door.
00:53:39.460 I'm either a stressed out, sad sack forced to come home to a noisy house with a bunch of needy kids who won't give me a chance to decompress, damn it.
00:53:48.460 Or I'm an incredibly blessed man, privileged to come home each night to a lively home full of fun, rambunctious children and a wife who loves me.
00:53:58.460 I could be either one of those.
00:54:00.460 It's completely up to me.
00:54:03.460 And the thing is, when I walk in the door, the environment what I'm walking into is the same.
00:54:08.460 It is entirely up to me how I choose to perceive it.
00:54:12.460 How I choose to see it.
00:54:14.460 And if I choose the sad, miserable door, I have no one to blame but myself.
00:54:19.460 Third, my third point is stop.
00:54:27.460 And this goes to really, this is advice, universal advice for everybody.
00:54:32.460 Stop venting.
00:54:34.460 Okay.
00:54:35.460 You've done enough venting.
00:54:37.460 And I know everybody says that we have to vent.
00:54:41.460 We have to release our tension in the form of these self-pitying, overly dramatic sessions.
00:54:47.460 And if we don't, we'll explode or something.
00:54:49.460 But that's bull.
00:54:51.460 Stop venting.
00:54:53.460 It's unhealthy.
00:54:54.460 Forums like this Reddit forum, they should not exist.
00:54:57.460 These are awful places.
00:55:00.460 Nothing good comes from them.
00:55:03.460 Having a place to anonymously voice your darkest and most unspeakable emotions and thoughts
00:55:08.460 in order to then be assured by other anonymous people that it's totally normal to feel that way
00:55:14.460 and to be encouraged in your basest impulses and most dysfunctional modes of thought is bad.
00:55:20.460 It's very bad.
00:55:21.460 It's not good for you.
00:55:22.460 Especially because all the people that are, and I read the comments under a lot of those,
00:55:27.460 a lot of those posts that I just read, people giving their own advice.
00:55:31.460 The advice is terrible.
00:55:32.460 I mean, it's just awful.
00:55:33.460 There was one post that I don't think I read of a woman whose, her young son is about to be his birthday.
00:55:41.460 And, and she's not happy about his birthday and not excited about it.
00:55:45.460 Which again, it's like, okay, so you're not excited about his birthday.
00:55:49.460 Deal with it.
00:55:50.460 Like it's his birthday.
00:55:51.460 It's not yours.
00:55:52.460 Pretend you're excited.
00:55:53.460 Damn it.
00:55:54.460 Stop being selfish.
00:55:55.460 But one of the pieces of advice that someone, uh, left a bunch of, you know, had a bunch
00:56:01.460 of likes, upvotes or whatever was, um, well on, on the day of his birthday party, just leave
00:56:07.460 the house and have some time to yourself.
00:56:08.460 Don't tell anyone, just leave and come back at night.
00:56:12.460 Like this is your advice.
00:56:15.460 So worst possible thing.
00:56:17.460 Abandon your child on their birthday.
00:56:19.460 Cause you're sad.
00:56:21.460 This is what you get from these forums.
00:56:23.460 And the reason that you get it is because the people that are there leaving comments, they
00:56:27.460 are not encouraging you or trying to reassure you.
00:56:30.460 They're trying to reassure themselves.
00:56:34.460 They're only there to make themselves feel better.
00:56:36.460 They have these awful thoughts and feelings about their own family and their children.
00:56:40.460 And they're trying to find a place where other people are saying the same things so that they
00:56:45.460 can tell themselves it's not so terrible to feel this way.
00:56:47.460 And so everybody, they're all just encouraging themselves in the form of encouraging other
00:56:52.460 people to be the worst versions of themselves they can possibly be.
00:56:57.460 Now the truth is, I know we like to say that, you know, there's no such thing as a wrong
00:57:06.460 feeling and you should be honest about how you feel.
00:57:10.460 Well, there is such thing as a wrong feeling.
00:57:12.460 You shouldn't hate your children.
00:57:14.460 It is wrong to have that emotion.
00:57:16.460 It's possible to have wrong emotions.
00:57:20.460 Yeah.
00:57:21.460 And that's one of them.
00:57:22.460 Like it's bad to have, you shouldn't feel that way.
00:57:25.460 There's something wrong with you morally.
00:57:27.460 It is morally wrong to have that feeling.
00:57:30.460 Actually.
00:57:31.460 The level of anger expressed by most of these people is wrong.
00:57:36.460 Having this kind of disdain for your family is wrong.
00:57:40.460 Venting this kind of stuff doesn't get it off your chest.
00:57:44.460 It doesn't work like that.
00:57:46.460 You know, it's not like opening a window in the bathroom to air out the smell.
00:57:49.460 It's more like a gust of wind on a campfire.
00:57:52.460 All it does is make the flame grow and spread until it's completely out of control.
00:57:57.460 And next thing your whole life is set on fire.
00:58:00.460 And that's what these Reddit forums do.
00:58:02.460 So what should you do?
00:58:05.460 If you have feelings like the lady who says that she doesn't like her 11 year old son,
00:58:10.460 can't wait for him to leave the house.
00:58:12.460 Well, um, and by the way, speak for yourself.
00:58:16.460 You call your 11 year old son boring.
00:58:17.460 Like you're the boring one.
00:58:20.460 There's nothing more boring than a, than a middle aged woman.
00:58:23.460 It was like, Oh, my life's hard.
00:58:24.460 Like that's, Oh my God.
00:58:26.460 That's boring.
00:58:27.460 You're boring.
00:58:28.460 That's boring as hell.
00:58:29.460 Yeah.
00:58:30.460 And so what should you do?
00:58:32.460 You shouldn't look for an anonymous group of fellow self pitying whiners to unload that on.
00:58:37.460 You should realize that this feeling is wrong.
00:58:40.460 It's not normal.
00:58:41.460 It's not okay to feel that way about your children.
00:58:44.460 The problem is you.
00:58:46.460 It's not your child.
00:58:47.460 It's you.
00:58:48.460 Your children didn't do anything wrong.
00:58:49.460 You are doing the wrong thing and you need to fix it.
00:58:52.460 You need to fix it.
00:58:53.460 So sure.
00:58:54.460 Go talk to a therapist.
00:58:55.460 If you can find a good one.
00:58:57.460 Big if there, but if you can find a good one, talk to a spiritual advisor, even better.
00:59:02.460 Talk to a priest, talk to a pastor, but after all the talking, it comes back to you.
00:59:09.460 You owe it to your child to give him your love.
00:59:14.460 In fact, you owe it to your family to be happy.
00:59:18.460 Happiness is a responsibility.
00:59:21.460 And it is a choice.
00:59:24.460 And right now you're making a choice that is destroying you and your family.
00:59:29.460 And it will continue to until you stop making it.
00:59:34.460 Well, that'll do it for the show today.
00:59:36.460 Thanks for watching.
00:59:37.460 Thanks for listening.
00:59:38.460 Talk to you on Monday.
00:59:40.460 Have a great weekend.
00:59:41.460 Godspeed.
01:00:06.460 They gon' say I'm racist.
01:00:09.460 Joining us now is Matt, certified DEI expert.
01:00:12.460 Here's my certification.
01:00:13.460 And what you're doing is you're stretching out of your whiteness.
01:00:16.460 This is more for you than less for you.
01:00:17.460 Is America inherently racist?
01:00:18.460 The word inherent is challenging there.
01:00:20.460 I want to rename the George Washington Monument to the George Floyd Monument.
01:00:23.460 America is racist to its bones.
01:00:25.460 So inherently.
01:00:26.460 Yeah.
01:00:27.460 This country is a piece of shit.
01:00:29.460 White folks.
01:00:30.460 Trash.
01:00:31.460 White supremacy.
01:00:32.460 White woman.
01:00:33.460 White boy.
01:00:34.460 Black person around here.
01:00:35.460 What happened?
01:00:36.460 Black person right here.
01:00:37.460 Does he not exist?
01:00:38.460 Hi, Robin.
01:00:39.460 Hi.
01:00:40.460 What's your name?
01:00:41.460 I'm Matt.
01:00:42.460 I just had to ask who you are because you have to be careful.
01:00:44.460 Never be too careful.
01:00:45.460 In theaters September 13th.
01:00:47.460 Rated PG-13.