00:01:01.860And also because my son had gotten a bow and arrow set for Christmas, but the arrows were kind of cheap and a few of them were broken already.
00:01:10.720So I said to him, you know what? I'm going to whittle you. I'll make you an arrow. That's what I'll do.
00:01:17.120All right. Your old man's going to show you how to make an arrow. And so he was very excited about that.
00:01:22.300Also, my son's going through kind of this Elizabeth Warren phase where he's obsessed with Indians and he's learning about Indians, reading about them.
00:01:32.040He has a teepee that he plays in. And so I thought it'd be cool to show him how Indians would make arrows.
00:01:38.420I assume that this is how they did it. So anyway, the problem was that I couldn't find my pocket knife.
00:01:44.500So I texted my wife and said, where's my pocket knife? I want to whittle an arrow.
00:01:48.180So, um, and I guess it shows, it tells you something that my wife didn't really question that at all.
00:01:54.800She didn't have any questions. She just, she just told me where, where she put it.
00:01:58.120And I know you might say, what kind of a man has to text his wife about where his pocket knife is.
00:02:03.100It should just be in his pocket. But I text my wife to find that where, you know, it's just a reflex.
00:02:07.640Anytime I'm looking for anything, I'll just text her. I was, I texted her, where's the refrigerator the other day?
00:02:12.220It's just, it's a reflex now. It's just what I do. So I text her, where's the pocket knife? She told me, I said, I'm going to whittle an arrow.
00:02:18.640She didn't really have any reaction to that, oddly enough. And then about 90 seconds into the whittling process, I took a nice little chunk out of my finger.
00:02:27.740It went pretty deep and the blood was flowing pretty good. And then I didn't know where the band-aids or the hydrogen peroxide is.
00:02:33.920So I had to text her where, where are the band-aids and the hydrogen peroxide. So it's kind of a, it's sort of a funny, you know, thing there for her, because from her perspective,
00:02:42.220I text, where's my pocket knife? And then like 90 seconds later, hey, by the way, unrelated, where are the band-aids and the hydrogen peroxide?
00:02:52.400Just so you know, though, that my kids were not traumatized by the sight of me bleeding all over the place.
00:02:57.980And I know that because while I was in the process of bleeding and fumbling around for band-aids,
00:03:03.020my son comes up to me and asks for a snack. So that just to show you how concerned he was.
00:03:07.700Anyway, um, the Golden Globes were yesterday. I, I, uh, they, the Golden Globes were held yesterday.
00:03:14.240I haven't seen the ratings yet for the show, but I continue to doubt whether any human has ever actually sat down to watch an entire award show on television.
00:03:24.400I just, I can't, I refuse to believe that anyone would do that to themselves willingly.
00:03:31.060Um, of all the ways to spend an evening, you could read a book, you could play a board game, you could will whittle an arrow, you could cut off your finger.
00:03:38.920So many things you could do that would be better than sitting there for seven hours, watching rich people congratulate themselves.
00:03:46.360Um, I just, I don't believe that anyone has ever done. I don't think that any award show has ever been watched on TV by anyone. That's my theory.
00:03:56.340But there was an award show yesterday, the Golden Globes. And, um, it seems that one thing happened there that's worth mentioning.
00:04:03.660Um, because it was a moment of incredible, though unintentional honesty. Um, Christian Bale won the Golden Globe for his performance as Dick Cheney in the movie Vice.
00:04:17.640I haven't seen the movie. Uh, I've heard that it's absurdly openly biased, not surprising about, you know, that's not very surprising.
00:04:25.100Basically, it's just an undisguised hit piece against Cheney and the Bush administration. It makes no attempt at all to appear that it's anything other than a hit piece.
00:04:36.700And here's the thing about that. I don't personally, I don't have a problem with movies that mock politicians.
00:04:44.080Um, as I say all the time, politicians should be mocked. Mocking politicians is, it's an American pastime. It's an American tradition.
00:04:53.580It's about the most American thing you could ever do is insult one of our politicians. They should all be insulted. Just, just on principle. It's a wonderful thing to do.
00:05:06.280The problem, though, is that Hollywood would never make a Vice-like movie about, say, Bill Clinton.
00:05:14.160It would never, ever put something so nakedly scornful and contemptuous, um, out there about a Democrat politician. It would just never do that. That's the problem.
00:05:27.560The problem is how one-sided it is. My, my dream, my vision would be a, uh, a situation where there are these kinds of movies coming out every year, tons of them, about Republicans and Democrats, where we're just constantly mocking and making fun of these people.
00:05:44.200It's, it's, it's, it's what Thomas Jefferson would have wanted. Okay. Now, the closest thing that I think Democrats have done, or Hollywood has done, uh, same thing.
00:05:55.780The closest thing Hollywood has done about Democrats would be the movie Choppa Quiddick, um, about the time when Ted Kennedy drowned a woman.
00:06:05.500Um, but the, and I saw that movie. It's a, it's a very good movie, but the difference is that they waited 50 years to tell that story and the movie, which again, was a good movie worth watching, but it's also, it's a mature movie.
00:06:20.680Okay. It's not agit prop. It's not a, it's not a cartoon like Vice. And so the principal players all come across about as sympathetically as possible, given the circumstances, given that it's a movie about a woman drowning.
00:06:34.780And then people trying to cover it up and, uh, trying to, you know, figure a way to wiggle out of it legally and politically, given all of that, the principal players come across about as sympathetically as possible.
00:06:49.760Um, the movie isn't trying to paint anyone as just straightforwardly evil. Um, those kinds of movies are always about Republicans. Always.
00:07:01.060A Democrat will never be the target of a movie like that. So in any case, uh, Christian Bale won.
00:07:10.520And then he gets up there, uh, to accept his award. And as kind of a nice change of pace, because usually, or often anyway, you'll see these people go up and they'll thank God for helping them to produce whatever piece of filth they're being awarded for.
00:07:27.180But in this case, Christian Bale proceeded to thank Satan during his acceptance speech. And I think it's the first time, I don't know, but I'm pretty sure it's the first time in a Hollywood awards ceremony that Satan has been explicitly thanked, uh, for helping, uh, whatever achievement.
00:07:47.160Now his, his, his thanking of Satan was meant to be tongue in cheek. He was saying that Satan helped him, helped to inspire him to play Dick Cheney.
00:07:58.220So it was meant to be an insult of Dick Cheney, obviously. Um, but it was unintentionally, I think the most honest moment in the history of award shows.
00:08:09.300And really, I would prefer this. I would prefer it if most of these people went up there and just thanked Satan rather than thanking God for whatever degrading nonsense they produced.
00:08:25.380Because Satan is glorified by Hollywood much more than God is glorified. And I think Satan's influence is far more evident in most of what Hollywood comes out with than is God's influence.
00:08:41.460So yes, thank Satan. Satan deserves most of the credit, after all. I think Christian Bale had that right.
00:08:49.060So that was a, I think in the end, that was a revealing, honest moment. And we should all be thankful for it.
00:08:58.760Speaking of award shows, you've heard obviously that Kevin Hart had to resign from his Oscars hosting gig after the outrage mobs descended on him for some supposedly homophobic jokes that he made years ago on Twitter and in one of his stand-up acts.
00:09:15.500Well, Hart appeared on Ellen this past Friday, and Ellen obviously is a lesbian woman, and she expressed her support for Kevin Hart and asked him to rescind his resignation and to host the Oscars again.
00:09:30.440She said that she talked to the Oscars people, and they said that they would still like to have Kevin Hart host, even though they threw him under the bus and all that.
00:09:39.480So she said that she thinks Kevin Hart's a great guy, a phenomenal talent, he's already apologized for the jokes, and he shouldn't need to keep apologizing, and we should all just move on.
00:09:49.960That was her point. Now, I'm not much of a fan of Ellen DeGeneres. I don't, I'm not, I don't really have an opinion about her one way or another.
00:09:58.060I don't watch the show. But I thought it was a good moment. And I thought it was great that she kind of stood up to defend Hart against the rage mobs.
00:10:09.320And it was good that she did it as a lesbian woman, because you would think, according to the rules of identity politics, that should sort of shut down the rage mobs.
00:10:24.000Now that because she has credibility to stand up and make this point. Well, the left apparently did not agree. They did not like that Ellen had betrayed them by refusing to join with them and grab a pitchfork and all of that.
00:10:44.540So Ellen was attacked for defending Kevin Hart. I'll give you just one example of the responses that she received. There was an editorial that made the rounds over the weekend, and the editorial had this title, Who Died and Made Ellen DeGeneres the Gay Pope?
00:10:59.040The article by someone named Drew Goines says, in part, kindness doesn't mean forgiving people who've done bad things without being sure they understand what happened and are committed to making things right.
00:11:17.220DeGeneres' unilateral dispensation to Hart on behalf of the LGBTQ community and her kneecapping of Hart's critics truncates that process.
00:11:26.080That's bad for all the LGBT people she claims to represent, and it's bad for Hart, who gets to skip over the part of the process where he becomes a better, more empathetic person.
00:11:36.160Hart made a half-hearted apology when he announced that he was stepping down as host, but he hasn't made any clear amends to LGBTQ people, and he certainly doesn't seem to have atoned for his words.
00:11:47.720How can he, so long as he views the criticism of his past words as, quote, slander on my name?
00:11:53.720More important, even if Hart had more fully repented, his sins are not Degeneres' to forgive.
00:12:05.140Well, then, first of all, who is the person who's allowed to forgive him if Ellen DeGeneres can't?
00:12:12.280But think about the words that are being used here.
00:12:17.860Repent, dispensation, make amends, atone.
00:12:24.920Who exactly is the one claiming to be Pope?
00:12:28.740I mean, what sort of egomaniac demands atonement rather than simply accepting the apology?
00:12:40.140What is that, what do you, what is he supposed to do, according to you, Drew Goines, and the rest of the people on the left who are upset that Ellen DeGeneres dare accept an apology from Kevin Hart?
00:12:52.620What is he supposed to do to atone himself?
00:12:55.660Does he need to go out into the wilderness for 40 days and fast?
00:12:59.380Does he need to walk down the street, you know, in, I mean, begging forgiveness?
00:13:08.720What does he need to, does he need to run through some kind of gauntlet?
00:13:13.840If somebody hurts your feelings, if someone says something that hurts your feelings, and they apologize, that's supposed to be the end of it.
00:13:23.760You're not supposed to say, well, you haven't fully repented.
00:14:27.900Who are you to demand that someone be your ally?
00:14:31.400Or that he engage in outreach and make amends?
00:14:38.200The apologies, he was, his only sin here, his, his, uh, his crime, which was not really a crime,
00:14:46.240but his crime was that he said, he, he said words seven or eight years ago that I guess hurt some people's feelings, supposedly.
00:14:54.240Um, and I don't, I don't even buy that they really hurt anyone's feelings at all.
00:14:59.940Because if anyone's feelings were hurt, they would have expressed it seven or eight years ago when he originally said it.
00:15:06.740But when you go digging something up, when you go looking for a fence, and you find it, you can't claim to really be offended.
00:15:16.180Okay, when you go searching desperately through Twitter or whatever, or combing through the archives of somebody's past, um, stand-up performances,
00:15:27.380looking for something offensive, you're, you obviously want to find it.
00:15:33.300And so when you find it, you can't say, oh my gosh, my feelings are so hurt.