The Matt Walsh Show - May 22, 2018


Ep. 35 - If Marriage Isn't Permanent, It's Pointless


Episode Stats

Length

25 minutes

Words per Minute

171.942

Word Count

4,411

Sentence Count

294

Misogynist Sentences

8

Hate Speech Sentences

15


Summary


Transcript

00:00:00.000 So there was a royal wedding over the weekend.
00:00:01.840 I don't know if you heard about it.
00:00:02.780 It was kind of an intimate affair.
00:00:05.160 They weren't making a big deal about it, you know, just invited a few of their close family members.
00:00:11.740 So maybe you didn't hear about it.
00:00:12.780 And look, I don't want to get into a whole thing, a whole rant about what's the point of the royal family?
00:00:18.000 It's so stupid.
00:00:19.280 I'm not going to get into that because although I don't care about the royal family, I do appreciate, in principle,
00:00:26.540 I appreciate the idea of countries preserving their traditions.
00:00:30.260 I'm a fan of that.
00:00:32.240 Now, this tradition has turned into a bit of a soap opera, too much for my taste.
00:00:37.820 But, you know, so whatever, I'm fine with that.
00:00:40.700 And anyway, the Brits can do what they want.
00:00:43.060 And if they want to spend money on keeping the royal family together, then, hey, that's on them.
00:00:48.900 So what I wanted to talk about was jumping off, using as a jumping off point, a tweet that was sent out by a Twitter user by the name of Yvonne over the weekend.
00:01:01.840 And she was commemorating this special occasion of the royal wedding by celebrating divorce.
00:01:07.500 And what Yvonne said was, all my females, if Megan never left her first marriage, she wouldn't be a princess today.
00:01:16.180 There is always better.
00:01:18.780 There is always better.
00:01:21.780 Isn't that just a great way to go into a marriage?
00:01:26.020 Till death do we part, unless something better comes along.
00:01:29.320 In which case, I'm out of here.
00:01:31.060 Sorry, chump.
00:01:31.740 I'm gone.
00:01:32.260 Now, this declaration wouldn't be notable, except for the fact that it has received, last I checked, over 300,000 likes and something like 80 or 90,000 retweets.
00:01:47.060 So obviously, this marriage advice, which happens to be the worst marriage advice ever recorded in human history, resonated with a lot of people in our culture.
00:01:56.900 And so I think it's worth addressing.
00:01:58.440 And fortunately, I think the bright side is that it also provides a valuable opportunity for all the single men of America, what you could do if you're a single man or if you're dating, if you're discerning marriage, and if you're with a woman, before you propose, what you could do is what I would recommend.
00:02:13.740 If she's on Twitter, go on Twitter and scroll through and see if she ever liked or retweeted or expressed any endorsement whatsoever of that tweet, because a lot of women in America did.
00:02:28.920 And if you see that there, just run the other way as fast as you can.
00:02:34.100 Run. Just run.
00:02:36.020 I'm talking about even if you were like sitting at dinner, and this will be rude to do, but if you happen to check her Twitter while you're sitting at dinner with her, and you saw that, then just get up from the dinner table and run.
00:02:49.080 Just run out of the restaurant.
00:02:51.560 Don't even say goodbye.
00:02:52.620 I'm out of here.
00:02:53.220 Because any woman who takes that view of marriage is not suited for marriage and is not suited for adulthood, is not suited for human relationships in general.
00:03:04.460 Okay, that's someone who just is, I mean, that is selfishness and immaturity on a scale unimaginable.
00:03:15.180 Okay, anyone who takes that view, stay away from me.
00:03:18.520 Now, it should be noted that Meghan Markle, and I did look this up for some reason.
00:03:26.940 Well, because I knew I was going to talk about it, so I felt like I needed to.
00:03:30.400 Meghan Markle, she is divorced, and according to a book that's being written about her and interviews with people familiar with the situation,
00:03:40.760 she abandoned her husband, just left her husband one day out of the blue and blindsided him.
00:03:45.780 We didn't see it coming.
00:03:46.920 She just left him, and I guess they were, when she decided this, they were in different parts of the country.
00:03:52.300 She mailed him back her wedding ring and just left him.
00:03:57.440 A couple years later, she finds a richer and more famous guy and decides to marry him.
00:04:03.620 And we're told that when I've asked women, like, why do you care about the royal wedding?
00:04:07.880 What I've been told is, well, it's like a fairy tale.
00:04:10.180 Well, it's a fairy tale romance.
00:04:13.020 Is it really?
00:04:14.260 Because in order for this fairy tale romance to happen, another marriage had to be destroyed and a man had to be abandoned.
00:04:21.120 And the vows that she made to him, she had to break.
00:04:23.660 So she broke those vows, and then she found this other guy.
00:04:26.900 That's a fairy tale?
00:04:28.760 Now, that's not the kind of fairy tales I'm familiar with.
00:04:30.620 And sadly, considering the rate of divorce for second marriages is around 60%, chances are this will not be the last stop in her marital tour.
00:04:42.840 And when you get to third marriages, the rate of divorce is like 75%.
00:04:46.760 And I wish her no ill will, but the point is, you know, it's not hard to see why divorced people tend to keep on getting divorced.
00:04:54.900 There's this domino effect of divorce that happens.
00:04:57.400 It's not hard to see why, because marriage, there's only two ways of looking at marriage.
00:05:03.200 Either it's a lifelong, unbreakable covenant, or it's not.
00:05:07.900 And if you've already been divorced and you're getting married again, well, clearly you think it's not.
00:05:13.120 And you're taking that attitude with you into your next marriage, which is not a good way to start.
00:05:21.140 Another way to frame it is like this.
00:05:22.860 For Christians, the best way to frame it is, when we're talking about marriage, Jesus either defined marriage correctly or he didn't.
00:05:33.340 And as it happens, many churches in America believe that he didn't.
00:05:37.060 And they teach that he didn't, well, he didn't know what he was talking about, I guess.
00:05:40.580 Which is why they allow, which is why in so many churches, they allow for their members to get up on the altar
00:05:46.720 and make an undying until death do we part commitment to a person and then come back a few years later and make it to another person
00:05:54.160 and then another person and another person, even while the people they're divorcing are still alive.
00:05:59.480 So until death do we part, eh, eh, maybe not.
00:06:02.780 That's what many churches in America, that's what they've turned the marriage vows into.
00:06:07.580 They've turned it into until death do we part, eh, you know.
00:06:11.380 Maybe that should be officially incorporated into the marriage ceremony.
00:06:14.640 It's just like this motion, you know.
00:06:16.360 It's like, eh, we'll see.
00:06:18.380 We'll see.
00:06:19.440 That's what the churches have done.
00:06:21.580 And in these churches, let's understand what's happening here.
00:06:24.860 In these churches, polygamy is completely permissible because this is polygamy.
00:06:31.960 According to Jesus, this is polygamy.
00:06:34.020 You're still married to that other person.
00:06:35.660 The bond is still there.
00:06:36.880 You marry another person.
00:06:37.980 Now you've tried to marry two people.
00:06:39.200 That's polygamy.
00:06:39.700 It's just that now we allow polygamy in succession rather than all at once.
00:06:45.340 But a man who marries five different women is a polygamist.
00:06:49.660 Whether he marries them one at a time or all at once doesn't matter.
00:06:53.120 It's the same thing.
00:06:54.740 But if marriage is not a lifelong covenant, which I guess most Christians these days think it isn't,
00:07:02.180 then what is it?
00:07:03.360 And what purpose does it serve?
00:07:05.260 Why bother with it?
00:07:06.360 If it's not permanent, and if you don't really mean it when you say, when you vow your undying commitment and loyalty to a person, why do it?
00:07:16.560 I understand the legal benefits and the tax benefits.
00:07:20.400 Let's put that aside for a moment.
00:07:23.220 Spiritually, what's the point of the exercise?
00:07:26.360 It has been drained of its meaning and its purpose in that case.
00:07:29.480 And then all it is, all marriage is, in that case, is just another thing you do, hoping it'll make you happy.
00:07:37.420 And if it doesn't make you happy, and inevitably there will come a time when you're not happy, at least for a season.
00:07:44.520 That's what happens in most marriages.
00:07:45.940 You know, it is not going to be a state of unbroken euphoria all the time.
00:07:53.860 There's going to be unhappiness.
00:07:55.260 There's going to be, you know, anger.
00:07:58.040 There's going to be all kinds of things.
00:07:59.520 So if you go into a thing, I'm doing this to make me happy, and then you're not happy, then you just, you know, you kind of trade the marriage in, like an unsatisfying dish at a restaurant.
00:08:07.320 You say, well, this displeases me, waiter.
00:08:09.840 Take this away.
00:08:10.660 Yeah, bring me that over there.
00:08:11.800 Bring me that on the menu.
00:08:12.580 Let me try that one instead.
00:08:14.400 This is why I always say that most churches in America gave up on marriage, destroyed it, really, long before the homosexuals came knocking.
00:08:24.580 You know, long before there was any gay marriage fight, the churches had already abdicated.
00:08:30.740 They'd already given up when it comes to marriage by giving their blessings to rampant divorce and remarriage.
00:08:37.980 They had already removed from marriage its entire point.
00:08:41.880 And that point, again, is to be a spiritual, an unbreakable spiritual bond between man and wife, a bond that brings them closer to God and which serves as the foundation for the family.
00:08:54.420 And when that bond is broken, then the two fall away, not only from each other, but from God, and the foundation which was formed now cracks, and the children who were supposed to be sheltered by and given security by this foundation are now buried under its rubble.
00:09:10.720 That's what happens.
00:09:12.640 And when I say the bond is broken, you know, that's not exactly the right way of putting it, I guess, because according to the Christian understanding, according to Jesus, the bond cannot be broken.
00:09:22.200 It is unbreakable.
00:09:24.420 Jesus says this very clearly in Matthew when he's asked about it by the Pharisees.
00:09:28.520 He says,
00:09:28.920 What God has joined together, let no one separate.
00:09:44.420 They are no longer two but one.
00:09:48.640 He either means that or he doesn't.
00:09:52.000 It's either true or it isn't.
00:09:54.420 In marriage, we either become one with our spouses or we don't.
00:10:01.520 And if we do, then we must remain one no matter what.
00:10:06.420 That's why Jesus says you can't get remarried, because you're still married to the other person.
00:10:12.020 That bond is still there.
00:10:13.700 That's the whole beauty and miracle and power of marriage is that it's a sacrament bestowed on one spouse to the other and vice versa, and then it is sealed by God.
00:10:33.480 But the point is that in a marriage ceremony, something real is actually happening.
00:10:40.960 There's a real thing taking place, a supernatural event.
00:10:45.920 You are witnessing a supernatural event.
00:10:48.540 You are witnessing two souls come together and to be bound together for life.
00:10:55.300 It's a miracle.
00:10:56.300 It's a miracle.
00:10:57.300 It's a miracle.
00:10:58.300 And this is the problem with all the Christians today who, you know, they see everything is symbolic and nothing is sacramental.
00:11:04.160 And so they've lost.
00:11:05.180 So they don't even understand.
00:11:07.080 They've taken the significance and the beauty and the depth out of everything.
00:11:10.440 And everything now is just it's just a charade.
00:11:12.780 It's a pageant.
00:11:13.440 It's just words that you say.
00:11:14.700 Nothing has any meaning.
00:11:16.080 But that's not how it's supposed to be.
00:11:17.680 That's not what Jesus is saying.
00:11:18.780 He's saying marriage has meaning.
00:11:20.420 Something is happening.
00:11:22.700 You are doing something here.
00:11:24.780 Something serious and real is happening.
00:11:28.140 And you can't undo it.
00:11:30.480 It's done.
00:11:32.400 Just like that.
00:11:34.040 Of course, people who are familiar with the Bible will observe that Jesus allows for an exception, supposedly.
00:11:43.740 And in Matthew, he does say, he says,
00:11:46.000 Everyone who divorces his wife, except on grounds of unchastity, which is variously translated as sexual immorality, adultery.
00:11:55.560 So everyone who divorces his wife, except on those grounds, makes her commit adultery.
00:12:01.260 Now, Matthew is the only place in the New Testament where you find this exception.
00:12:07.340 Problem is that the passages in Mark and in Luke, they don't contain this exception.
00:12:12.280 They also record Jesus talking about the indissolubility of marriage, how it's an unbreakable covenant.
00:12:19.220 They don't include any exception whatsoever.
00:12:21.740 And then St. Paul, he discusses marriage.
00:12:23.900 He talks about divorce, but he includes no exception.
00:12:28.020 He says, don't get divorced.
00:12:30.080 So what's happened, though, is a lot of churches, and this process really started long before this,
00:12:36.840 but in many churches, it really began to take hold in the early 20th century, where they latched on to this exception,
00:12:44.560 and they just are clinging to it now desperately and wringing it dry of every possibility.
00:12:51.220 And this little, quote-unquote, exception has been used and taken, and just, it has destroyed the marital covenant in America.
00:12:59.280 Which is an interesting, you know, it's an interesting thing when, and you find this in the Bible, you know,
00:13:04.900 the different gospel accounts are a little bit different.
00:13:06.860 And, but when you find something like this, where Jesus says it only in one gospel and in none of the others,
00:13:15.120 and so you, you know, in a sense, you almost have to choose which one are you going to take to heart.
00:13:23.180 And it's interesting that so many Christians have, I mean, it's interesting they've chose, that's the one.
00:13:28.240 They could take Mark and Luke's interpretation, but no, they say, well, no, that's not exact.
00:13:32.300 No, I'm going to take this one.
00:13:33.200 This is the one I like.
00:13:34.880 Now, but it is there, so we have to deal with it, right?
00:13:37.260 I mean, we can't just write it off.
00:13:38.900 So what is it?
00:13:40.480 What does it mean?
00:13:42.240 And why does it appear only in one gospel?
00:13:45.200 And think about the gospel that it appears in.
00:13:47.560 Matthew is a gospel that was written specially for a Jewish audience.
00:13:53.180 And even in that passage, Jesus is talking to a Jewish audience.
00:13:57.620 He's talking to the Pharisees.
00:13:59.760 So it's Jesus talking to a Jewish audience in a gospel written specially for a Jewish audience.
00:14:05.000 And for some reason, this one interesting, mysterious, vague exception appears only in that context and nowhere else.
00:14:14.340 Why is that?
00:14:15.360 Well, it seems to me that the idea that this is really just a broad sweeping exception allowing for a divorce,
00:14:21.000 negating Jesus' own teaching on marriage, allowing for divorce in any case of unchastity or adultery,
00:14:27.900 well, that just doesn't hold.
00:14:29.520 It just doesn't make sense.
00:14:31.900 It doesn't work with everything else in the New Testament.
00:14:35.280 It doesn't work with Jesus' own words, even in the context of that passage,
00:14:39.520 where he says man and wife become one flesh, and then for him to immediately, a sentence later, say,
00:14:47.120 well, but maybe not.
00:14:48.980 That doesn't work.
00:14:50.680 It also doesn't work because, and again, there's debate about what exactly, how do you interpret that?
00:14:57.000 I mean, what is adultery?
00:14:57.980 What does it mean?
00:14:58.220 Well, Jesus also defines adultery in Matthew by saying, if you look at a woman lustfully,
00:15:06.740 then you have committed adultery.
00:15:09.920 And so if we're really going to take that exception to heart, well, that means that if a man so much as looks at a woman,
00:15:16.940 that's grounds for divorce.
00:15:18.540 You're done.
00:15:19.760 Right?
00:15:20.140 I mean, you're sitting on a park bench with your wife.
00:15:22.440 A woman walks by.
00:15:23.620 You look at her.
00:15:25.060 You can get divorced.
00:15:25.880 That's it.
00:15:26.260 She can leave.
00:15:26.720 Because Jesus says that's adultery in your heart.
00:15:30.320 And Jesus is being serious about that.
00:15:32.300 I mean, we have to take him literally.
00:15:33.580 We take him at his word.
00:15:34.880 That if you lust after a woman, even for a moment, in your heart, in your head, then you have committed adultery.
00:15:40.720 But you take that and you apply it to what he's saying here, at least the way people interpret it,
00:15:45.540 then it would seem like, well, you could basically get, that means that basically every marriage in America can be broken.
00:15:51.040 You could get, because adultery in the heart is, sadly, an extremely common thing in marriages.
00:16:00.340 Not just in America, but throughout human history.
00:16:02.540 Right?
00:16:03.320 So, you know, that also doesn't work.
00:16:05.400 That would mean that he goes from saying marriage is a union, you know, man and woman, they come together, let no man separate.
00:16:11.440 And then a couple sentences later, he's saying, well, but actually, every marriage can be dissolved.
00:16:17.920 No, it doesn't make sense.
00:16:19.180 But that's how it's been interpreted.
00:16:21.140 So how can we understand it?
00:16:22.880 Well, there are a few different theories.
00:16:25.580 One theory is that Matthew put that in there as a means of avoiding the whole subject of adultery,
00:16:34.000 because he didn't want to alienate his Jewish audience.
00:16:36.980 And so he kind of just punted on it.
00:16:39.100 And he put that in there, which is possible.
00:16:42.440 Look, the gospel writers, they all kind of take from their perspective and the audience they're talking to,
00:16:47.420 they frame things differently.
00:16:49.720 It's like, for instance, you know, most biblical scholars agree that the Sermon on the Mount,
00:16:53.740 which appears in at least the expanded version, the director's cut version that appears in Matthew,
00:17:01.720 it's much longer than it appears elsewhere, because Matthew has taken teachings that Jesus said at other points,
00:17:07.600 and he's kind of put them all together into this one cohesive unit.
00:17:11.100 It doesn't mean that Jesus actually said all that right then.
00:17:14.220 He did say it all, but most biblical scholars think he didn't say it right then.
00:17:18.140 He said it at various points.
00:17:19.360 Because then other gospels, some teachings from the Sermon on the Mount,
00:17:22.180 they appear in the Sermon on the Mount for Matthew,
00:17:25.340 but then in other gospels, they appear elsewhere.
00:17:27.400 So how do you make sense of it?
00:17:29.000 You know, it's because the gospel writers, you know,
00:17:31.000 have their own ways of kind of presenting things.
00:17:33.680 So that's possible.
00:17:35.060 Another is that Jesus is that this is just a matter of wording,
00:17:38.280 and that what Jesus is saying is that anyone who divorces his wife causes her to commit adultery,
00:17:43.540 unless she's already committed adultery, in which case he hasn't caused it,
00:17:48.460 because she already committed it.
00:17:50.100 But I think the most logical theory, and the one that makes sense of everything,
00:17:54.920 is that Matthew is speaking to people who do marriage differently from the rest of the world,
00:18:03.160 and from the way that we do it now.
00:18:04.600 And in Jewish custom at the time, there was a marriage, there was a legal marriage,
00:18:10.720 and then there was a period of some time before the marriage was consummated,
00:18:15.460 and that is made complete, made full through sexual relations with husband and wife.
00:18:22.240 And this is called the betrothal period, where there's a legal marriage,
00:18:26.800 but the marriage is not complete yet.
00:18:29.080 It has not come into its fullness yet.
00:18:31.380 And this was the Jewish custom.
00:18:34.660 So it would make sense that Jesus is speaking to,
00:18:38.840 and Matthew is speaking to people who take part in that custom.
00:18:43.520 And what he's saying is, if you commit adultery during that period,
00:18:48.000 before you've consummated with your husband or with your wife,
00:18:50.720 then the marriage is dissolved.
00:18:54.160 And it wouldn't even really be divorce in that case.
00:18:56.660 It is, legally it's divorce, but the point is the marriage was never complete.
00:18:59.860 Now, there's precedent for this.
00:19:02.220 Remember that this is what Joseph was going to do with Mary originally,
00:19:07.380 before he came to understand, or at least in some way came to understand,
00:19:11.620 what was really going on.
00:19:13.220 But he was married to her, but as he said, he had not had relations with her yet.
00:19:18.880 He had not consummated the marriage.
00:19:20.320 So when he thought for that moment that she had been unfaithful,
00:19:24.480 he was going to divorce her quietly so as to preserve her dignity.
00:19:29.840 But the point is, he was going to divorce because if she had been unfaithful,
00:19:33.680 then that means the marriage is dissolved anyway.
00:19:36.280 So, you know, it would seem that those theories make a heck of a lot more sense
00:19:40.060 than the idea that Jesus allowed for an exception that could apply to almost all marriages,
00:19:44.800 right after he just said that marriages are a bond eternally between man and wife
00:19:49.740 and no man can separate it.
00:19:51.160 You know, that to me doesn't make any sense.
00:19:53.400 And it especially wouldn't make any sense that this exception,
00:19:57.420 this glaring, huge, enormous, pivotal exception,
00:20:01.220 would only appear vaguely and confusingly in one gospel and nowhere else.
00:20:07.660 I think that in modern America, we have, and not just in America, but in modern society,
00:20:14.380 we have decided to interpret it that way because that's how we want it to be.
00:20:18.660 You know, I've always been someone who has encouraged marriage.
00:20:21.180 I've always been a proponent of marriage, but I think I need to add a disclaimer to that.
00:20:26.480 You know, you shouldn't be afraid to marry.
00:20:29.660 And I always say to people in my generation, don't be afraid of marriage.
00:20:35.160 You know, you should get married if you want to.
00:20:38.280 Don't be afraid of it.
00:20:39.900 But the disclaimer is, you shouldn't be afraid to marry
00:20:44.220 as long as the person you're marrying has ruled out divorce as an option to start with.
00:20:51.780 Because if they cannot look you in the eyes and tell you,
00:20:55.200 I will not leave you, if they cannot say that, don't marry them.
00:21:01.160 And not only should you not marry them,
00:21:03.100 it's not even just like you shouldn't marry them.
00:21:05.060 It's also that you can't marry them.
00:21:08.300 You literally cannot marry them.
00:21:11.260 Because in a, now you could go, you could have the ceremony,
00:21:14.620 you could say the vows, you could have the reception, you could have the honeymoon.
00:21:18.180 But if a person, while they're saying the vows, if they don't fully mean it,
00:21:23.920 and if in the back of their head, if they're thinking,
00:21:26.200 yeah, you know, I could leave if this thing goes sideways.
00:21:28.300 If, if in their head, they're thinking, well, this is not necessarily lifelong,
00:21:33.980 let's see how it goes.
00:21:35.480 If they've got somewhere in their mind, kind of an escape plan in mind,
00:21:39.220 then it's not a marriage.
00:21:41.360 The marriage wasn't valid.
00:21:42.640 It wasn't valid.
00:21:43.400 It didn't take place.
00:21:45.540 Because marriage requires full consent of the will.
00:21:48.180 It requires that both, as I said, it's a sacrament bestowed on one spouse to the other.
00:21:52.440 And if one of them isn't taking part in that bestowing, in that bestowing process,
00:21:57.180 if they are not bestowing their undying commitment on the other,
00:22:01.200 well, then there's no marriage.
00:22:02.340 There's a disconnect there, you know?
00:22:04.860 It's, it's, it's, the marriage is when the two come together and connect.
00:22:09.080 But when the one is not taking part, then there can't be a marriage.
00:22:14.280 That's literally, that's what the vow is.
00:22:16.460 That's what it's all about.
00:22:17.480 That's why you say the vow.
00:22:18.760 It's when you say to the other person, I will not leave you.
00:22:21.320 This is, until death do we part.
00:22:23.220 That's why we say it.
00:22:25.700 And if somebody won't say it, or if they will say it, but they refuse to mean it,
00:22:32.220 then there can't, there can, there literally cannot be a marriage.
00:22:37.700 And so I think probably in America today, there are a lot of invalid marriages.
00:22:44.340 Because there are a lot of people who go into marriage,
00:22:46.940 not really intending necessarily to stay in it.
00:22:52.680 They go into the marriage with this, basically the same internal commitment as, you know,
00:22:59.040 as, as they had before the marriage.
00:23:02.360 Which is a, yeah, I'm committed to you for now.
00:23:05.560 I love you for now, but I'm not promising necessarily to always love you.
00:23:09.480 I may say that I promise you, but I don't really.
00:23:13.400 Think about prenuptial agreements and everything, prenups.
00:23:16.420 I mean, I don't see how a marriage can be valid if there's a prenup.
00:23:20.320 Because that means that what, what, what you're saying is,
00:23:22.880 here's my escape plan.
00:23:24.280 Here's my escape strategy.
00:23:25.540 Yeah, I hope this works out, but I mean, maybe it won't.
00:23:29.180 And if it doesn't, then here's my, here's my plan B.
00:23:33.720 Well, then that means it's not till death that we part.
00:23:36.820 It means you're not serious.
00:23:38.880 It's not a marriage.
00:23:40.040 It's not what a marriage is.
00:23:41.580 It might be a legal marriage, but it's not really.
00:23:43.620 Spiritually, it's not a marriage.
00:23:45.320 It's what marriage is supposed to be.
00:23:47.820 That's where you find the security and the whole point and everything in marriage.
00:23:52.080 You find it when you can look at the other person and you know that there's this commitment
00:23:56.760 and you will never leave them.
00:23:58.740 That you're in it.
00:24:00.800 Always.
00:24:01.240 That's why, you know, that's why I, I, um, it's one of the many reasons why I, I so much
00:24:09.700 prefer being married.
00:24:11.240 You know, I, I, I, I enjoy marriage so much more than I ever did with like the whole, you
00:24:17.360 know, dating and everything.
00:24:18.880 Uh, one of the many, many reasons is that is, is that security that you have that kind
00:24:24.740 of emotional, spiritual security in knowing that, you know, even if there's hard times,
00:24:31.060 even if mistakes are made, even if there are times of unhappiness and anger and everything,
00:24:37.020 even if those times are numerous.
00:24:39.520 I mean, even if you go through a really rough patch, uh, you know that you're in it.
00:24:43.540 You're not going to leave because you made that commitment and you're bound to it and
00:24:48.220 by it and through it.
00:24:49.400 To not have that in a marriage is a scary thing and, uh, scary most of all, because then it's
00:24:56.840 not really a marriage.
00:24:59.000 Everything I'm saying here is just really basic biblical, you know, I, I'm just, I'm
00:25:02.900 being redundant and like plagiarizing the Bible.
00:25:05.100 Everything I'm saying is just right from the Bible, but, and that's what makes it so sad
00:25:09.020 and, and, and, and shameful really that many Christians will never hear anything like this
00:25:13.520 in their churches.
00:25:14.980 And so the marital institution is just collapsing all around us and most churches and most Christian
00:25:20.080 leaders refuse to say anything about it because they're cowards.
00:25:24.980 Jesus was not a coward, which is why he spoke to this issue directly multiple times.
00:25:31.260 And what he said was clear.
00:25:32.540 And so I think we need to go back to that.
00:25:36.240 Thanks for watching.
00:25:37.020 Thanks for listening, everybody.
00:25:38.920 Godspeed.