Ep. 380 - Rules For Thanksgiving
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
179.53468
Summary
How do you talk to your family on Thanksgiving? How do you tell them what to talk about at the dinner table? And how do you know what to avoid talking about at Thanksgiving dinner? The media has some ideas, but they ve got no idea how to do it.
Transcript
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Welcome to the show, everybody. Happy Thanksgiving as we get ready for Thanksgiving, the big day tomorrow, the final exam.
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Hope you've hope you've studied because, you know, the media, the media realizes that we're all a bunch of incompetent, helpless morons.
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And we don't know how to speak to our own families around the dinner table without precise instructions.
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And so fortunately, our betters in the media are always eager to help us out in this regard and to give us, you know, to give us those tutorials,
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which is why around this time every year, we are treated to a slew of conversational instruction manuals from the media telling us how to talk to our family.
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Not just not just what to talk about, but also how to talk about those things.
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So this year, as it happens, our white knights, our knights in shining armor, armor have have gone above and beyond the call of duty.
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And here's just a quick sampling. I looked on on on on Google and here's just a quick sampling of the how to talk to your family article.
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Which is a a burgeoning genre. A quick sampling. These are some that have been have been published recently.
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So we have how to talk about the economy with your family on Thanksgiving.
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Here's how to fact check your family at the Thanksgiving dinner table.
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How to deal with climate skeptics at Thanksgiving dinner.
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How to talk about politics at your Thanksgiving table.
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How to talk about the truth and Trump at Thanksgiving.
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How to talk about reproductive freedom with your anti-choice family members at Thanksgiving.
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How to talk to your misogynistic family members this holiday season.
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How to talk about gun control with your family at Thanksgiving dinner.
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How to talk about your career during the holidays.
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How to talk about medical cannabis at Thanksgiving dinner.
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How to talk about TikTok with your family this Thanksgiving.
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How to talk to your family about anime at Thanksgiving.
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Vegan? Here's how to talk to your family at Thanksgiving.
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How to handle money conversations on Thanksgiving.
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Five ways to talk to your pro-Trump family on Thanksgiving.
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Five things to talk about at Thanksgiving that aren't politics.
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How to have constructive conversations at a divisive Thanksgiving.
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Fifteen things you should never discuss at Thanksgiving dinner.
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Why you should talk about feminism with your family over the holidays.
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Seven ways to talk to your racist uncle this Thanksgiving.
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okay, but how do I talk about Thanksgiving on Thanksgiving?
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They have a how to talk to kids about Thanksgiving so that they really get it.
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Precise instructions for every imaginable topic.
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Lists of what to talk about, what not to talk about.
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It's very confusing, especially when they contradict a little bit.
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Because on one hand, it's, you know, how to dominate your family in a politics debate.
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And that's what you really need to sit down, you know, draw up a Venn diagram.
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And for me, this is why I'm always up until 3 a.m. or 4 a.m. the morning before Thanksgiving, cramming.
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You know, I'm popping Adderall and I'm trying to do as much studying as I can.
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We need a writer at Vox or NPR.com to tell us how to talk to our own families.
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And so, the first thing I do is I Google it, which is what I did here.
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You want to make sure that nothing spontaneous or sincere or lively or interesting or real or alive happens when you're with your loved ones.
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You wouldn't want to, you know, just talk to your family.
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It's important that you have the bullet points, the script.
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In fact, and don't feel like there's anything wrong with this.
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I know in a traditional test, you're not allowed to bring your notes with you.
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But this is a test where you're allowed to bring your notes.
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So, I will bring, I'll have a folder or a binder with all of my notes.
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And so, if somebody brings up climate change or they bring up gun control, all I say is just hang on a second.
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You know, I start flipping through and I find my notes.
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And I stand up and I walk immediately out of the room.
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And this is just, this is how you spend time with your family.
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And you have a lovely, lovely Thanksgiving that way.
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Okay, a few other things to talk about as we get ready for the holiday season to officially kick off here.
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But first, before we do, a word from the last coat.
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You know, the thing about the holidays is we all look forward to it.
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But the holidays, they come with winter time, right?
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And I know for me, especially during the winter, things are getting cold, muddy, slushy, snowy.
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And it makes it really hard to keep that car looking nice.
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And that's why I want to talk about the last coat.
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It's a proprietary, versatile, durable, all-in-one, easy-to-use, all-surface, do-it-yourself coating that gives cars a slick, mirror-like finish in just minutes.
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Also, it's great for glass, vinyl, leather, stainless steel, countertops, electric screens, most fabrics, and a lot more.
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Now, of course, this is a great gift idea, especially if you have a car lover in the family.
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But if you're a selfish son of a gun like myself, then you're going to give this gift to yourself, which is what I do.
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Because like we talked about yesterday on the show, you can't rely on your family to get you good gifts.
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A pre-holiday gift to myself, and I would recommend that as well.
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It creates a protective shell on your car that protects it from UV rays, road salt, abrasive soaps, stream temperatures, much more.
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And if you want to know how this works and how other people feel about it, the other customers, well, just look, and you'll see thousands of five-star reviews online.
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And for a limited time, my listeners can get a 25% discount on a 16-ounce bottle of The Last Coat.
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It's the most durable, all-service DIY coating technology on the market.
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For reference, an average-sized car only takes one or two ounces for full coverage.
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Again, that's thelastcoat.com slash Walsh and Walsh25 at the checkout to get 25% off.
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The Last Coat is an awesome gift idea for the car enthusiast in your family.
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That's thelastcoat.com slash Walsh and Walsh25 at checkout to take advantage of this limited-time offer.
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All right, by the way, here is PETA claiming that the Georgia Bulldog mascot is being abused.
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You see the tweet here, and you see the dog there in the rain, and PETA says,
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No dog deserves to be packed up, carted from state to state, and paraded in front of a stadium full of screaming fans.
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So you can't really judge a book by its cover as far as that goes.
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Second, though, more to the point, what you see here is a dog in his own private air-conditioned tent taking a nap
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You see the dog in his air-conditioned tent just hanging out, and all the miserable people on the rain, and PETA is concerned about the dog.
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Not to mention the dog travels around the country, has legions of adoring fans, is fawned over by everyone, has a diet better than me, gets better accommodations than I do when I travel.
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If you're looking for an example of a neglected or abused animal, you couldn't possibly choose a worse example than this.
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So I'm just not sure that this is a good example.
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Okay, here's something else that annoyed me a little bit.
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I think that's how you pronounce his last name, or Schnatter.
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Used to be a ubiquitous presence on TV, especially during the football season.
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Well, he got ousted from his company a year ago, you may remember, for alleged racism.
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But Papa John did an interview with WDRB in Louisville, and clips from that interview went viral yesterday, with everybody sort of cackling and mocking him for it, especially because of this part right here.
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I've had over 40 pizzas in the last 30 days, and it's not the same pizza.
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The way they're making the pizza, the way they're putting the pizza together, is just not fundamentally sound to what makes a Papa John's pizza a Papa John's pizza.
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It sounds like you're saying that it's taken a huge hit since your departure.
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Would you ever consider, or do you want to go back?
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I mean, every single thing you can possibly do wrong to mismanage this company, they're doing.
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Schnatter says he still loves the company he built, but he has sold millions in stock and is no longer the largest individual shareholder.
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My metaphor is there's no reason to be in the car when the car crashes, even if you love the car.
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If you were to walk back in as CEO, what do you think the employees would say?
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If the management team was out and I went back in, they'd be cheering.
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Okay, so he says he ate 40 pizzas in a month, which, yeah, is weird.
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I don't know if we're talking about 40 full pizzas or 40 slices of pizzas throughout a month, because 40 slices, that would be about a slice and a third per day.
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If we're talking 40 entire pizzas, then that's just deadly.
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But, and yeah, he looks a little bit sweaty there and everything.
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And that's the reason this went viral, because everyone's snickering and pointing and laughing.
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But this is just an example, I think, of our stupid, frivolous, perpetually adolescent culture.
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Because the real story here is that this guy, John Schnatter, he got railroaded, smeared, and tossed under the bus by his own company, the company he founded.
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These people that, you know, they just threw him to the wolves and stole his company from him.
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He was on a conference call with people in his company and a marketing agency.
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And the conference call, the subject of the call, was about how to navigate racial controversies as a company.
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So during the course of that discussion, apparently, this is, I guess, according to him, but I don't think anyone else, anyone ever denied that this was the context of it.
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So during the course of that discussion, he used the N-word.
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But he used it while quoting racist things that other people had said as an example of the sorts of controversies that they're trying to navigate, right?
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So he was basically saying, as an example of what they were talking about, remember when so-and-so said, said blank.
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Okay, he did say the word, but the context was totally innocuous.
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And traditionally, right, intent and context are important facets of human conversation.
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So if you say a bad thing, if you say a bad thing, and I repeat the bad thing you said by way of informing others that the bad thing was said, I am not myself guilty of the bad thing.
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And with the N-word, however, it has been decided that the word itself, just the actual word, those letters put together and the syllables, somehow transcend intent and context completely.
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So that intent and context make no difference at all.
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If the word is said by someone with the wrong skin pigmentation, it doesn't matter why it was said.
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I was about to call it silliness, but it's a lot more than silliness.
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When a person loses his livelihood and his reputation, it becomes something much more than silliness, I think.
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Because we must realize that a word is not a magical spell.
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A word itself, the power of a word, all depends on the intent and the manner in which the word is used.
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There is not a single word in existence that could never, where there could never be an innocent or innocuous reason to use it.
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Because the reason could be something as simple as, I'm telling you what someone else said, or I'm reading it.
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And besides, you might say, well, he shouldn't have said the word.
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In terms of self-preservation and navigating our crazy, politically correct culture, then, yeah, that's what he should have done.
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But if he had said N-word rather than just saying the word, he would still be communicating the words.
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You're still putting the word into someone else's head.
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You're causing them to think about the thing that you're conveying.
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So, practically speaking, it's not really any different.
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What if rather than say N-word or rather than say the word, what if he had spelled the entire word?
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So, you could say the first letter, maybe the second, but you can't say the last three.
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And what, if you spell the word, then you, again, have communicated the word and put the word into someone else's head,
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which is the same thing, practically speaking, as just saying it.
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Um, so, this guy loses his job and his reputation is destroyed, um, because of this.
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And, and the reason why that happened is that someone on the conference call went and leaked it to the media.
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And he's remembered now as a racist, even though there's no evidence that he is.
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And the most, the headline that most people take from this is that it's funny because he said he ate a lot of pizzas.
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He said in that interview how the people that threw him under the bus, he made it to millionaires.
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Um, he made the millionaires and then they set out to destroy him.
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As concerned as everybody is about cancel, not everybody, at least people who aren't on the far left.
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Um, so as concerned as people aside from far leftists are about the cancel culture, this seems to be one of the most egregious examples of it.
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I mean, this guy got completely railroaded in, in, in, in a, in a situation where it's obvious.
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Everybody on the conference call understands what they're talking about and understands what he's saying.
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And then one of them went, at least one of them went and, and decided to take this and just destroy the guy.
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That's, but yeah, it doesn't matter because he ate a lot of pizzas and he, and he looks sweaty in an interview and, and, you know, that's, that's all that matters.
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Um, listen up, by the way, I, I, I know, I know you, I think you need to do something very simple.
00:17:42.840
If you're planning on buying a daily wire membership today, you're gonna be surprised to hear me say this, but don't do it.
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I know it sounds counterintuitive and it is, but trust me, we don't want your money today.
00:17:58.340
And, um, I've been told that we're offering amazing deals.
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I don't know how you would kick yourself in the pants.
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That's what, that's, that's what my script says here.
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Well, anyway, you don't want to miss these deals.
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So, um, you want to get the, the deals on black Friday, on black Friday, there's gonna be crazy
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deals if you want to, uh, become a daily wire member.
00:18:25.560
And so I'm just warning if you do it today and then you could have saved all that money
00:18:30.280
So wait till Friday, but then on Friday, you want to go and sign up, become a daily wire
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member, all kinds of deals, all kinds of perks that come with it on Friday.
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There was, um, an article in the economist a few days ago titled the roots of the gender pay
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Um, and it's all about the, the child penalty, about how having children lowers a woman's
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It says it is well known that parenthood tends to hurt women's careers, but not men's numerous
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studies have shown that as a group, having children lowers women's lifetime earnings
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and outcome known as the child penalty, a wide range of individual decisions account for
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Some women work for you hours or not at all when their children are young.
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Others switch to jobs that are more family friendly, but lower paid.
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There's also a substantial variation in the size of the earnings decline, ranging from
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zero all the way up to a hundred percent in the case of women who stopped working
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Just two quick points I wanted to make about this.
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Number one, uh, calling it a, the phrase child penalty to me, it's just another example
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of the sort of scorn and disregard that we heap on children, uh, which, which I'm hesitant
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to use the word because it's so overused, but I would almost call it a sort of bigotry
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We talk about, you know, people are very open and talking about children as burdens or how they
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hate being around kids in public and, and, and, and so on.
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I don't think that's the right phrase to use child penalty.
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And I think that the women who choose to have kids and then make adjustments to their lives,
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maybe they're, they get a lower paying job so they can be home more.
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Maybe they leave their job and they stay home with the kids.
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I don't think that these women feel like they're being penalized.
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Um, and it makes sense really, because as much as the media might bemoan the loss of,
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of earnings that comes from having kids, you have to think when you're on your deathbed,
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um, well, I very much doubt that there's ever been someone on their deathbed looking back
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at their life and regretting that they hadn't earned more income.
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I just, I don't think that's the kind of thing that you're going to be worried about.
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And there, there, there are many things that we spend our days worrying about and caring about
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that we know when we are on our deathbed, unless we die suddenly in a car accident or something.
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But if we, if we're on our deathbed and we have that moment, we know that we're going
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to, you know, we're going to regret spending all that time worrying about those things.
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And so lifetime earnings is one of those things.
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On the other hand, when you're on your deathbed, I don't think you're going to regret having
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In fact, your, your regrets will be not that you had kids, but that you didn't spend more
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I certainly, and I am certain that no one's ever been on their deathbed and regretted and
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wished that they had spent less time around their family and their kids.
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I don't think anyone's ever been lying there hours before death and said, oh man, I wish
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I had taken more hours at work so that I would have been away from my kids more.
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So I think the, the decision to spend more time with your kids rather than, even if it
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means sacrificing money, that's a, that's a decision that most people will ultimately
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And, and even if you do regret, I mean, if, if you're on your deathbed and you're worried
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about your lifetime earnings and how much money you made, that's only going to be because
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you want to leave something for your kids, which means you have to have them.
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If you had no kids and you spent your entire life focused on yourself and on attaining material
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goods for yourself, well, that's not going to mean anything to you.
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You're going to see how empty and hollow that actually was.
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All right, before we get to some emails and we wrap it up for the week, speaking of Thanksgiving
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rules, I thought it would be helpful and necessary to review as we head into Thanksgiving, the rules
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and restrictions for Thanksgiving, as they apply to the food.
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These are as of now unwritten rules, but of course, upon my ascension to the throne, they will be engraved
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In fact, I'm going to have all my laws in carved to the, to the side of a mountain.
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It's going to have to be a pretty big mountain because I've got a lot of laws and rules and this will be
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I think I've got maybe five rules for, for the, for how you handle the food on Thanksgiving.
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Seafood in general is overrated, but I'm not going to stop you from eating it if you want to
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If you want to waste your time having shrimp or salmon or something, then go ahead.
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I don't know why you would do that when beef exists, but you know, knock yourself out.
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It's just, it's not substantial enough of a dish, uh, to have a place on the table.
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And I know when I go through this because my wife's family, they're big seafood fans.
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And I've got to watch them like a hawk because every holiday occasion, they're looking, they're
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looking for an excuse to put some seafood on the table.
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And so this is something, this is something I struggle with.
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Number two, absolutely no pasta on Thanksgiving.
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Pasta on Thanksgiving is wildly inappropriate and unethical.
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Thanksgiving is a time for American foods, not pasta.
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And don't give me the whole, what about mac and cheese?
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First of all, mac and cheese, macaroni and cheese on Thanksgiving.
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And besides, and here's the main point with the pasta.
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Number two, it, Thanksgiving is a time when it comes to the side dishes, this is a time
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And you're not going to put pasta and potatoes on the same plate.
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You're not going to put macaroni and cheese right next to, uh, your mashed potatoes.
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Number three, um, I will allow multiple proteins at the table.
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Uh, you want to have ham in addition to turkey.
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Turkey gets the, the, the prime place on the table.
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Uh, if there's only one protein that damn well better be turkey, ham has Christmas, ham also
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So it gets two holidays and ham can take a back seat.
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We can't let it steal the spotlight on Thanksgiving.
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Number four, all side dishes, green beans, potatoes, stuffing, cranberry sauce, et cetera, um, must
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Thanksgiving is, it's kind of like a Rolling Stones concert.
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If you're going to a Rolling Stones concert, you don't want to hear the song they cooked
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You want to hear the same stuff they've been playing for 50 years.
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If you went to a Rolling Stones concert in 1972 and you, you want the concert you go to
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in 2019 to sound exactly like that concert in 1972.
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We want the same dishes that our grandmothers made basically, unless your grandmother was
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a communist who put marshmallows and sweet potatoes, in which case she and you are getting
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shipped to the Gulag, uh, because her reign of terror is finally coming to an end and she
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And we'll get into the dessert and, and I'm shocked that this is even controversial.
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There are people that try to argue with this and I find it, I find it, uh, just stunning.
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Pumpkin pie is the primary dessert at Thanksgiving, uh, with homemade whipped cream.
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You know, if you put cool whip on that table, that's 15 years of hard labor.
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Uh, so you want the homemade whipped cream with the pumpkin pie.
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Now, if you want, again, it's kind of like the turkey, you've got the turkey as the star.
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You want to put some other kind, you want to put brownies down or cookies.
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They're around the peripheral, around the edges, but you got the pumpkin pie right there
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I've got no problem with pudding with crust, but it's just not elevated enough for the
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And if you, if you stick with that, you'll be fine.
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Now you might ask upon my ascension, how would I enforce these rules?
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Um, in order to enforce them, wouldn't it be necessary that I basically abolish everyone's
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And the answer to that is yes, I, you know, of course, absolutely.
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That's the whole point of being a tyrannical dictator.
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You know, I believe in constitutional rights and liberties for me, you know, I, and the
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So for me right now as a person without power, yeah, I want everyone to have those rights
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But obviously when I'm in power, I, you know, I have all the power, so I don't care about
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So that's going to go out the window and, um, here's, here's going to essentially be
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I'm going to have my military, uh, activated of course on Thanksgiving and they're going
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to go into, they'll be in every town basically.
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They're just going to come into a random house, do a check of the dinner table, make
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They're not going to be able to look at every house, but this is where my reign is going to
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So, um, I'm going to make it clear that, you know, if you observe infractions at your
00:29:34.120
dinner table by your family members and you report them, you'll get a $10,000 reward.
00:29:42.940
So, uh, and I, and I think with that terror along with, uh, the military, I think, you know,
00:29:50.460
we could really, um, basically snuff out all of the Thanksgiving infractions, which for
00:29:57.740
me, from, from my observations have become far too widespread.
00:30:01.920
Uh, so that's what you have to look forward to, but you might as well, even before I'm
00:30:05.840
dictator, you might as well start now and just start following the rules ahead of time.
00:30:10.960
So that by the time I'm sitting on the throne, you know, you've kind of gotten into the groove
00:30:18.320
Let's go to emails, mattwalshow at, uh, gmail.com, uh, mattwalshow at gmail.com.
00:30:22.840
This is from Nathan says, Mr. Walsh, I'm a freshman in high school and we were having
00:30:26.020
our first AP human geography debate in a few weeks on whether English should be the official
00:30:29.900
language of the U S I feel like I know what your opinion is, but I was trying to get some
00:30:33.660
good counter arguments to the whole diversity is our strength stitch stick because the counter
00:30:38.160
arguments I come up with sound cruel and unfeeling, which brings into question why I'm asking
00:30:42.360
you theocratic fascist, but I would love your input.
00:30:45.300
So yeah, I guess if you're looking for answers that are not cruel and unfeeling, then you're
00:30:51.320
talking to the wrong guy, but here's what I would say.
00:30:55.440
Uh, it's, well, it's more of a question, Nathan, that I would pose to anyone who goes with the
00:31:01.560
All you have to ask them is why is it our strength?
00:31:09.860
Now I'm guessing that most people who use that line will be defeated right there.
00:31:15.320
You've already beat them because they probably can't explain why it matters.
00:31:19.220
They're just going to start stumbling around and they won't be able to come up with an answer.
00:31:22.700
Um, but, and that's because they're so used to the assumption that diversity matters that
00:31:28.360
they've never actually stopped to think about why it does, or if it even does.
00:31:32.800
But if they come up with an answer, I assume it will have something to do with
00:31:36.560
how we are all enriched, you know, by the input and the influence of other cultures and how it
00:31:42.840
makes for a richer and more vibrant culture and so on.
00:31:47.100
It's really hard to be enriched by the influence of other people.
00:31:53.660
It's really hard to even have a culture that can be improved by diversity in the first place
00:32:01.380
So communication, the ability to communicate is one of the most fundamental, most essential
00:32:09.940
You literally cannot have a country or a culture if the people aren't able to communicate.
00:32:15.540
So whether diversity is our strength or not, communication is still essential.
00:32:24.760
Well, how am I going to, you don't have to argue that point.
00:32:27.940
Grant the point and say, okay, well, in order for that to make a difference, we need to be
00:32:35.660
I mean, how am I really going to be influenced and enriched and all of that by someone else
00:32:42.860
if I can't understand what they're saying to me?
00:32:55.600
It says, I understand your position on this, but our family has always really enjoyed getting
00:32:59.280
Christmas ornaments, particularly handcrafted one.
00:33:02.320
One notable example is how my sisters and their friends have given each other ornaments
00:33:06.520
from time to time, generally with some sort of particular meaning, such as a clear ball
00:33:15.420
We have a tradition in our family where we pray for the people who gave us the ornament,
00:33:19.080
since nearly every ornament on a tree is from someone, and many of them are handmade.
00:33:22.920
I have a bead craft that I make that I have used to make ornaments for my family, such as
00:33:32.180
One year, my dad and I carved a Christmas tree and a wreath out of a nice block of ash wood
00:33:37.320
Well, I certainly understand not wanting to get a red bauble for Christmas.
00:33:44.620
Sometimes an ornament can have a meaning or worth above its material value.
00:33:48.680
It goes back to the saying, it's the thought that counts, but in a good way.
00:33:51.820
The meaning behind the gift is what is important about it.
00:33:59.320
What thought was in your head when you got me a gift?
00:34:05.500
Okay, these are the questions that I'm asking myself.
00:34:11.160
I share your perspective that sex ed should not be taught in schools the way it is.
00:34:15.580
And in the case of schools in England, teaching primary school kids how to masturbate is horrifying.
00:34:21.120
But I was wondering how you feel in STD education in schools.
00:34:23.900
It seems that to me that this also should be left to the parents.
00:34:26.820
But considering there are many parents that feel uncomfortable talking about stuff like this
00:34:29.540
with their kids, would it not be beneficial for schools to teach students about STDs?
00:34:33.200
Because obviously this should wait until the kids are at least 13 to 14.
00:34:36.720
But it seems clear to me that it's better for all students to know the dangers of STDs
00:34:44.380
Well, yeah, they should know about STDs the same way we teach them about any other disease.
00:34:53.840
That was my point with sex ed, that you don't need a specific sex ed subject.
00:34:58.380
You want to teach the biology of human reproduction?
00:35:07.440
STDs, again, that's a topic that is covered in an academic environment.
00:35:13.400
It's when they get into their own ideology, their own perspective on sexual activity and
00:35:24.840
I'm not a parent myself, but I respect the fact that you don't seem to follow new age
00:35:30.960
I'd love to hear you go on a rant about parents who let their kids misbehave in public.
00:35:35.100
I was out the other day and saw a kid acting out majorly while his mother wasn't doing anything
00:35:39.600
Well, Tony, I agree there are a lot of bad parents these days.
00:35:50.520
I agree that a lot of parents let their kids get away with everything and that those kids
00:35:55.200
go on to inflict society with themselves being generally spoiled, lazy, entitled, and so
00:36:00.740
I agree this is a problem, and much of it goes back to parenting, so I wouldn't deny that.
00:36:07.440
But maybe I'll throw a curveball at you today by not giving you the rant you asked for, because
00:36:14.860
there's another side to this that you as a non-parent, I think especially, probably need
00:36:21.640
You didn't really give me any details about this situation that you witnessed with the
00:36:30.320
I don't know what his mom was doing or not doing.
00:36:32.720
It's possible that what you saw was totally egregious and inexcusable, and I'd certainly
00:36:42.280
But, so I don't know if what I'll say here applies to this situation or not.
00:36:51.140
But it does apply to many situations that you're likely to see.
00:36:55.820
You can't judge a parent based on one short snapshot, okay?
00:37:01.760
You can't, and we all do this, but we shouldn't.
00:37:04.560
You can't look at a parent in one brief, isolated, stressful moment, see how they're acting, see
00:37:11.080
how they're reacting, see how they're handling it, and then make sweeping judgments, calling
00:37:19.680
Unless the parent is doing something really, really, as I said, egregious, really harmful
00:37:24.180
and awful, in which case, okay, but barring that, I don't think you can dismiss a parent
00:37:30.520
based on how you see them react in one isolated incident to a child that's misbehaving when
00:37:35.640
you don't know the context, you don't know anything about them.
00:37:43.540
They don't take your stress into account, really, especially at a certain age.
00:37:49.500
They're not going to look at you and say, oh, hey, you know, looks like dad's having
00:37:57.140
I don't mean to make parenting sound like nonstop misery.
00:38:02.260
And so you see a parent out in public not really being Johnny on the spot with the discipline,
00:38:09.880
and you could assume that that's a terrible parent, fine, but maybe it's been a really
00:38:19.180
tough day with that kid or a tough week or a tough year.
00:38:23.260
And the mom on top of that maybe is dealing with problems at work.
00:38:31.240
Maybe she's just taking the child out to spend some time with him, making an effort.
00:38:42.420
She feels like she's been doing too much of that already this week and today.
00:38:48.800
She tries to be lenient because she's emotionally worn out, and she feels like she's been coming
00:38:55.560
And she feels like patience and lenience right now is the best approach.
00:38:59.400
And so what you interpret as lazy parenting and bad parenting and terrible parenting, maybe
00:39:09.020
Maybe this is actually a mother who desperately loves her son and her family and is just trying
00:39:16.920
And she knows you're watching, and she knows that you're heaping this judgment on her, but
00:39:27.420
I've just created a scenario out of whole cloth.
00:39:31.660
Maybe, as I said, maybe she really is a terrible parent, neglectful mother, the kid's a snot
00:39:41.360
But I don't know, and you don't know either, and that's the point.
00:39:44.480
So why not extend the woman and her child a little bit of grace and just assume that she's
00:39:51.840
Why assume the worst in someone that you don't even know?
00:40:02.300
Even though I am a parent myself, and I know how it is, and this is something parents do
00:40:08.020
Because, you know, you as someone who's not a parent, at least you have an excuse that
00:40:11.700
you don't really know how it is because you've never had kids.
00:40:14.320
But as parents, we know how it is, and we've all been in tough spots with our kids, and
00:40:19.180
we've all had kids that have acted out at some point in public, and we've all felt overwhelmed.
00:40:25.560
Yet we still will even judge each other when we see parents doing things that we have done
00:40:38.460
I was in the parking lot about to pull out of the grocery store.
00:40:40.360
This mother comes out, and she's got her kid by the arm, and you can tell she's furious.
00:40:48.780
She's screaming at the kid, and she puts him in the car, slams the door, walks around,
00:40:57.900
And I happened to see this, and for a moment, I thought to myself, oh, that woman needs to
00:41:10.360
And it's true that we should refrain from public scenes of that sort, and screaming
00:41:15.800
at your child really is not the right approach.
00:41:18.980
But then I had to stop myself and think, you know, I have no idea.
00:41:25.340
I have no freaking clue what's going on in that woman's life.
00:41:30.420
I mean, her husband may have just died of cancer.
00:41:39.580
All I've seen of this woman, I don't know her name.
00:41:44.620
All I've seen is this one snapshot, this one 60-second clip of her at her absolute worst,
00:41:55.100
And so I happen to see that, just that one glimpse, her angry, her feeling obviously overwhelmed
00:42:01.960
And I'm going to presume to make any judgments or assumptions about her at all based on that.
00:42:11.180
And I just feel like we can choose to cut people slack or not.
00:42:18.480
We could choose to give them the benefit of the doubt or not.
00:42:26.120
And especially when it comes to parents, I just think that sometimes we should stop and
00:42:30.500
say, look, this is not excusing everything, but sometimes we stop and say, listen, maybe
00:42:40.300
And this could be a great parent 99.9% of the time.
00:42:44.200
Maybe you caught the 0.1% where they don't really have it together.
00:42:52.340
And I say all of this maybe somewhat selfishly because as a parent myself, I do, I would want
00:42:58.460
people to extend that grace to me if they ever caught me in public in the moment, you know,
00:43:05.060
not reacting exactly how I'm supposed to react, which I have been guilty of in the past, I
00:43:12.100
So we will, I'll leave it there with that sappy note for the holidays.
00:43:17.180
That was my one, that was my, that was a one, that was a glimpse of humanity and generosity
00:43:31.380
If you enjoyed this episode, don't forget to subscribe.
00:43:36.440
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00:43:40.880
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00:43:44.900
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00:43:48.880
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00:43:53.080
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The Matt Wall Show is a Daily Wire production, copyright Daily Wire 2019.
00:44:14.220
It's Thanksgiving, and you know what that means.
00:44:16.400
Pumpkin pie and mashed potatoes and a bunch of insufferable leftist think pieces preparing
00:44:21.000
liberals to suffer the torture of speaking to a single conservative, even once, even one
00:44:26.700
they're related to, even for just a couple of hours.
00:44:30.020
We will examine how liberals talk about talking to us.