Ep. 479 - Tough On Fake Crime
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Summary
Alex Jones announces his plan to eat his neighbors, and in our daily cancellation, I must cancel my own child, my own flesh and blood. Today on the Matt Walsh Show, Mayor s across the country are getting tough on criminals who violate social distance directives, but why aren t they ever this tough on real crime? And five headlines, including President Trump s claim that over 2 million people would have died without a lockdown, we will analyze that.
Transcript
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Today on the Matt Wall Show, mayors and governors across the country are getting very tough on
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quote-unquote criminals who violate social distancing directives, but why aren't they
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ever this tough on real crime? And five headlines, including President Trump's claim that over two
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million people would have died without a lockdown. We will analyze that. Is there any truth to that
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whatsoever? There isn't, by the way, but not to give a spoiler, but we'll talk about that. And
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Alex Jones announces his plan to eat his neighbors. And in our daily cancellation, I must cancel my
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own child, my own flesh and blood. I hate to do it. It's not something any father ever wants to do,
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but I have no choice. And I will explain why. All of that coming up. But first, this is very
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important as well. Given the week that we're in, I want to tell you something about our friends over
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at Books. You know, Mother's Day is on the way. My wife reminded me of that yesterday. She said,
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by the way, Mother's Day is this coming weekend, just so you know. FYI, you know, hint, hint,
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nudge, nudge. Mother's Day is on the way. And just because you can't be with your mom on Mother's
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Day, that doesn't mean that you can't do something for her. And in fact, it certainly doesn't get you
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off the hook. You still have to do something for her. So you can't give mom a hug, but you can send
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flowers from the Books company. Books, you know that's short for bouquets. Books are responsibly
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Now that we're spending more time at home, how about a little self-love to brighten your day
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and your space? So, you know, you can buy these flowers for your mom, for your wife. You can also
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buy them for yourself. And this means that, you know, if you're not doing something for your mom
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and Mother's Day, if you're not doing something good for your mom and Mother's Day, that just makes
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you a bad person, I think. So don't be a bad person. Send smiles no matter the miles with
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books.com slash Walsh. That's B-O-U-Q-S dot com slash Walsh. And enter code Walsh for 25% off your
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entire order. Again, that's code Walsh for 25% off at books.com slash Walsh. Also another holiday
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today. It's May 4th, of course. So as a huge Star Trek fan, I just want to say, you know, happy
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May 4th. May the 4th be with you, as they say. You know, call me a nerd, but I feel like we're all
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Gryffindors today, to quote Frodo Baggins. Anyway, just want to mention that. Now, first thing off the
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top here, because it's starting to annoy me. Maybe it shouldn't, because it doesn't affect
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me. But when has that ever gotten in the way of something annoying me? I just want to say,
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you know, you don't need to wear a mask when you're driving in your car. I don't know if
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you knew that. Or when you're walking down the street, or going for a jog. Unless there's
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an ordinance in your town requiring that, although even in that case, I would say probably you still
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shouldn't wear in those circumstances, because it's insane. Now, where I live, there definitely
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is no ordinance requiring you to wear a mask anywhere but at the store. Yet in the last few
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days, I've seen people wearing masks in the car, wearing them while they walk down the street. I saw
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a guy out in his garden working in his yard with a mask on. I saw somebody jogging with a mask on.
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And I assure you, if you're one of those people, let me just
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allay any concerns that you might have. This is not necessary. The virus is not going to leap in
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your car window and attack you. It is not spread that way. If somebody coughs on the sidewalk while
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you're driving down the road, the chance of you being infected is effectively zero. I mean,
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I guess it's not literally zero. But then again, the chance of you being abducted by space aliens,
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or physically assaulted by Bigfoot also is not literally zero. So it's effectively,
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for all intents and purposes, it's a zero percent chance. And if you're walking down the street,
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outside, even if you pass by another person, we have no data to suggest that transmission is
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happening under those conditions. I'm not aware of a single confirmed case anywhere in the world
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where two people walking past each other outside managed to pass it to each other. So you can just
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take it easy with that. I'm not saying don't wear a mask. I'm just saying that wearing a mask
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everywhere all the time is unnecessary. And it's kind of crazy. And I'm seeing it a lot. And I think it
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contributes to the panic and the fear. It gives people the wrong impression. And you're helping
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to keep the lockdowns going longer by contributing to the public perception that this virus is some
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sort of magical super bug that can infect you no matter where you are or what you're doing or how
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close you are to another person. You know, I read these polls. In fact, I just read one before going
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on the air. This is from The Guardian. Actually, it's a poll from the UK, but it's similar. A similar
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situation is here. The headline is fearful Britons remain strongly opposed to lifting coronavirus
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lockdown. And I read stuff like that. And polls here in the US, like I said, are saying similar things
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and that most people supposedly want the lockdown to continue. They don't want to leave their homes.
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They don't want to get back to any sort of semblance of their normal lives. I read that and my first
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reaction is to think, no way. There's just no way that after two months of this and the destruction
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of our economy, the erasure of our liberties, there's no way that people are in the mood for
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more of it. I can't possibly imagine that, especially in this country, in America. I mean,
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we're Americans. We like to be free. We like to do what we want to do. That's my first reaction. And I
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still think the polls are exaggerated or skewed by the way the question is framed. Like if the person
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conducting the poll is giving the poll taker two options and one is, do you want the lockdown to
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continue or do you want to do nothing whatsoever to mitigate the virus, then a lot of people are
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going to choose the former rather than the latter. But of course, that erases the middle option where
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there's no lockdown, but we're still doing things to mitigate the virus. So you take all that into
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account. It does seem though that even taking that into consideration, it seems that a large
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preponderance of people, maybe a majority, I don't know, are still nearly incapacitated by fear
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and would still rather hide under their beds indefinitely than go back out and start living
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their lives. And that's why I'm saying if we're ever going to have our lives back and our country
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back and our economy back and our liberty back and our dignity back, I think it's incumbent on all of
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us to project a sense of calm and a sense of confidence. I'm not saying that we shouldn't
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socially distance or that we shouldn't ever wear a mask or we shouldn't take basic precautions.
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I'm not saying any of those things, but I am saying that we should not be overly fearful and
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panicked and unreasonably scared or just unreasonable in general. The sorts of people who now refuse to
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walk to the mailbox without a surgical mask on, that's not what we should be doing. Or in fact,
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I did see someone walk into their mailbox with a scarf wrapped around their face. I guess it's
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possible that they were just cold, but then, you know, it's like 60 degrees here. So I doubt it
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like a scarf rack wrapped around their face, like, like they're, like they're charging into a burning
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building or something. Just walk into the mailbox. And there's no reason for that.
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So let's all, let's all just calm down a little bit and, uh, and try to be reasonable.
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Now, I also wanted to talk about this to start the show. Um, mayor Lori Lightfoot in Chicago has been
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speaking of, uh, being unreasonable. She's been certainly unreasonable and one of the most,
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and, and her, a lack of reason also certainly does affect other people in a very direct way.
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She's been one of the most tyrannical dictators through this entire thing. Uh, she has just really
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enjoyed being, uh, playing the part of Empress of Chicago. And you could tell she's getting a big
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kick out of it. And on that note, here she is over the weekend, uh, doing more of her tough guy or
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tough girl routine. Now I've directed superintendent Brown to order all police districts to give special
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attention to these parties. And this is how it's going to be. We will shut you down. We will cite
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you. And if we need to, we will arrest you and we will take you to jail period. There should be
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nothing unambiguous about that. Don't make us treat you like a criminal, but if you act like a criminal
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and you violate the law and you refuse to do what is necessary to save lives in the city in the middle
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of a pandemic, we will take you to jail period. Um, so there you go, not to be pedantic, but, but,
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but firstly, uh, there should be nothing unambiguous about that means that there should be something
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ambiguous about it. So what she was saying there is that she wants it to be ambiguous
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because otherwise, now I think what you meant to say is that there should, that, that this should
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be unambiguous or there should be nothing ambiguous about it. But anyway, if you're, if you're going for
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the tough guy routine, you have to really nail the lines. Otherwise it doesn't work. Uh, but there's a
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lot more to say in reaction to that. And we will do that. Uh, but first a word from legacy box,
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off while supplies last. Uh, okay. So mayor lawyer, Lori Lightfoot says that if you violate social
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distancing, then you're a criminal, a crook, a fugitive from justice, which means of course that
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she is too. She is all those things, a criminal crook, a fugitive, a danger to her community.
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After all, remember this is the woman who got her haircut a couple of weeks ago, even after
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forcibly shutting down all of the hair salons and barbershops and everything in the city and legally
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prohibiting anyone else from getting a haircut. She went out and got a haircut and just, just for fun
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to, uh, speaking of remembering things to reminisce, let's go back and recall the excuse she gave
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after she was caught getting her haircut. Here was her excuse.
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I'm the public face of the city. I'm on national media and I'm out in the public eye and you know,
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I'm a, I'm, I'm a person who I take my personal hygiene very seriously. As I said, I felt like I
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needed to, um, have a haircut. I'm not able to do that myself. And so I got a haircut.
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So she's in a, she's in the public eye and she takes hygiene seriously. Unlike the average
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filthy Chicago resident who doesn't care about hygiene, apparently I take hygiene seriously.
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I don't know about the rest of these other rubes. They don't, so they don't, they don't need to get
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their haircut. They don't need to take showers. They're peasants, you know, they're dirty peasants,
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but I, I am the mayor and I need to practice good hygiene. Um, because, and you also know the other
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thing about mayor Lightfoot is, uh, she of course is renowned for her looks. So, um, she needs of
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course to get that haircut as the face of the city and everything. But in any case, she's a, she's a
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criminal by her own care categorization. She is a criminal. The other point we've seen, of course,
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similar rhetoric like this from Emperor de Blasio. Uh, we know about him threatening to round up the
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Jews, threatening to close churches permanently. If they defy his wishes, Empress Whitmer, uh, barring
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people from even buying seeds and that sort of thing. Many other mayors and governors across the
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country. We've heard this and we've talked about how this is a power trip from them. So a lot of this
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rhetoric is just them enjoying being absolute Supreme ruler. They're getting a kick out of it.
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But I think there's another aspect of this that's important to understand. Um, so ask yourself
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before this, before the coronavirus, when did you ever see Lightfoot or Whitmer or de Blasio
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especially, or any of the rest of them getting up in front of cameras and taking this kind of hard
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stance against actual criminals? I mean, Chicago has lost a hell of a lot of people over the years,
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over recent years, to gang violence, drug related violence, et cetera. Uh, in the long term,
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that is still going to be a greater threat to residents of Chicago than coronavirus will prove
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to be. And this is the case for every major American city. They've all got crime and, and, uh,
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and everything else. Yet these mayors aren't nearly as tough on actual crime, actual deadly crime as
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they are on people who walk too closely to each other on the sidewalk. So I think a big part of
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the motivation here is that it gives these weak mayors and governors an excuse to act like they're
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tough on crime, act like they care about protecting their citizens. They're too afraid to take this kind
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of stance under normal circumstances because they're afraid of charges of cruelty or brutality or racism
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or whatever else. But here they can do it and they can get away with it. In fact, I think there's a lot
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of this kind of posturing going around. So here's another example. Um, I saw this tweet yesterday and,
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uh, I I've seen, and I'm just using this as an example because I've seen this kind of suggestion.
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And it's, it's not entirely serious. So half serious suggestion, but I've seen this bandied
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about quite a bit. So let me show you this. Here's the tweet. Um, it's got a thousand likes.
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It says friend in Bay area law enforcement had a funny idea. No tickets, no arrests for social
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distance violations. Just put a mark on their driver's license. That means do not treat for COVID
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if they show up at a hospital little harsh, but it does put hashtag skin in the game. Like I said,
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I've heard this from a lot of people. Like if you, if you violate social distancing and you get sick
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from coronavirus, you don't deserve medical treatment or whatever. But this again is the
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kind of hard line stands you never hear during normal times. After all, if we aren't treating
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people for coronavirus because they violate social distancing, what about refusing treatment for,
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uh, people who sleep around when they get STDs or refusing to treat someone with, uh, heart disease
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if they eat fast food or refusing to treat, uh, an alcoholic for liver damage or a smoker for lung
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cancer. Not only would that never be suggested, but the same people who will scream at you for
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going to the park or to the beach during the coronavirus will also scream at you. If you dare
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suggest that obese people who eat fast food are being self-destructive. So it's a lot of posturing
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going on. And by the way, I'm not suggesting that, uh, an obese person with heart disease
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shouldn't be treated because they eat fast food. That's not my approach, but I also wouldn't suggest
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that about coronavirus. You know, if you, if you go to the park or if you go to the beach and then
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you get coronavirus, first of all, if somebody goes to the beach and then a week later they're in the
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hospital for coronavirus, uh, the chance that they got it at the beach is very, very, very small.
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There are many others. It's more likely that they got it at Walmart or the grocery store when they're
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grocery shopping, but either way, no matter where they got it, they still deserve to be treated.
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Let's go on to headlines. Um, number one, Donald Trump was on Fox news last night. Here he is
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making an interesting claim. When you look at the other side that, that you're on the other side
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medically are, do you think that as deaths are going up and cases are going up that we really
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are on the other side medically and that this is a great success story from the federal government?
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Well, I can, well, it's too soon to say that really, I guess, because, you know, we're still
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in the middle of something, but certainly we would have lost a lot more people, Brett, if we would
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have done, as an example, you call it herd, if we would have done herd. In other words, everything's
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wonderful. Let's just keep going along herd immunity. We would have lost two and a half million
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people, I think, or a million and a half or two million people. No, I think we've done it. I
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think the American people have done a good job. This is a tragic situation. Everybody knows somebody
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that's been affected. That's a very rare thing. Okay. Now this is nonsense from Trump and whether
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you, however you feel about Trump, you're a big Trump supporter. Uh, this is still nonsense,
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total nonsense. And we shouldn't accept this kind of fear, even if you're a Trump supporter,
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I don't think you should accept this kind of fear mongering nonsense from Trump any more than
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you accept it from anybody else. In fact, you should accept it less from the guy you support
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two and a half million without a lockdown. That's crazy. Where is he getting that number? Well,
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he's getting that number. I think he's partially getting it from his own imagination. He's also
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partially getting it from models that have been abandoned for weeks. Now, these models were abandoned
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weeks ago. Uh, if a non lockdown strategy would kill two and a half million people, then Sweden,
00:19:35.300
which has not employed a lockdown strategy should have way more deaths right now than it currently
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does. And besides for the umpteenth time, the choice was not between locking down or doing nothing.
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Trump says, if we had said everything is fine, nobody ever said that we should say everything is
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fine. I mean, arguably Trump himself was sort of saying that or nearly saying that back in March
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when he said the virus had infected 15 people and it would go away after that. He did say that.
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Um, but, uh, most people that's, that's not the point we've been making. The other option is not
00:20:09.320
doing nothing or acting like everything is fine. The other option is to protect vulnerable communities,
00:20:14.020
practice social distancing where needed and possible. Um, and yes, develop herd immunity, which,
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which is going to have to happen anyway. There is no getting around it. It will have to happen.
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You cannot avoid it. So the other strategy is avoid economic collapse, protect the vulnerable
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and get on with doing the thing that we have to do anyway. And that right now we're just delaying
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that. That's the idea. Two and a half million dead from that. Come on in this. Think about this. Okay.
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In this country, 20,000 of our deaths so far that we know of are in nursing homes. Um, in some European
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countries, according to studies that have been done, half of their deaths are in nursing homes.
00:21:00.800
What does that mean? It means we could have significantly decreased the death rate just by
00:21:06.760
shutting down nursing homes earlier and, and using our resources to protect vulnerable populations.
00:21:11.840
When you add up, I mean, think about this and I don't have the numbers right in front of me,
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but you can, you can go and Google it. So add up the number of people, uh, killed in nursing homes.
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And then the number of, of general 75 plus deaths, uh, that are not in nursing homes. I don't even
00:21:30.140
know if you could find that specific number and then also throw in the death rate in New York city.
00:21:35.660
And much of that is in nursing homes, but the non nursing home deaths in New York city.
00:21:39.520
Okay. Okay. You take all that into account. And that is a huge preponderance of the overall deaths
00:21:46.080
in America. Um, which mean, what does that mean? Does it mean that that doesn't, they don't,
00:21:51.980
that doesn't matter? No, of course it matters. The point is we could have protected people 75 plus
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vast majority of them not working anyway. So, you know, having them not work is, is, is not a problem
00:22:03.640
because they don't work anyway. Um, protect the nursing homes. And, uh, and then, yeah,
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if you want to do a lockdown in New York city, which has been hit way harder than anywhere else,
00:22:14.460
because for, for a few reasons, uh, because it's got the subway system, which has been a vector for
00:22:21.220
disease. It's got a population density of like 27,000 people per square mile. I mean,
00:22:26.080
there are a lot of unique things in New York city. So you address those specific situations
00:22:32.220
and you have mitigated much of the death just from that.
00:22:38.500
But once, once you take those deaths and you set them aside just for a minute,
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you're left with really no justification for telling a young and healthy guy in North Carolina
00:22:54.000
or, or Minnesota, um, that, or South or, or Maryland that he can't go to work.
00:23:03.140
There's no justification for it. Essentially, you're telling me he can't go to work because
00:23:07.840
there's a virus that's infecting New York city, people, 75 plus and nursing homes.
00:23:13.660
That doesn't make sense. And the other thing is if we, if we had focused on that,
00:23:19.860
not just on that, I'm not saying we, we, we do nothing where everyone else is concerned. I mean,
00:23:23.780
we, we still have social distancing. I think in some circumstances you should be wearing a mask,
00:23:27.520
even if it wasn't required. Um, so we do stuff like that, good hygiene, washing your hands and
00:23:33.360
everything else. But if we had focused most of our resources on protecting the
00:23:37.780
vulnerable, shutting down nursing homes, rather than expending resources on trying to enforce
00:23:43.780
a house arrest on, on hundreds of millions of Americans, if we had done that, we could have
00:23:48.700
saved many of those lives that we didn't. Number two, and now Asia, after exporting the coronavirus
00:23:55.140
has decided to give the world another gift, uh, the giant murder hornet, the Asian murder hornet,
00:24:01.440
it's called actually the, the Asian giant hornet, I guess, which, whichever you call it,
00:24:05.360
calling it Asian is obviously racist, but I didn't come up with a name. You know, this is,
00:24:08.880
this isn't on me reading from CNN. Um, for the first time, the Asian giant hornet, that's,
00:24:15.420
that's pretty racist from CNN, CNN. They're one of the ones telling us, do not call it the Chinese
00:24:21.600
virus. And now they're calling this the Asian hornet. That's, I don't know, anti-Asian bigotry
00:24:28.560
going on here for the first time. Uh, Asian giant hornets have been spotted in the United States,
00:24:32.580
specifically in Washington state. Scientists say beekeepers have reported piles of dead
00:24:36.280
bees with their heads ripped off an alarming sight in a country with a rapidly declining
00:24:41.420
bee population and more than two inches long. They're the world's largest hornet with a sting
00:24:45.400
that can kill humans if stung multiple times. According to experts, Susan Kobe, a bee breeder
00:24:50.480
at the Washington state says they're like something out of a monster cartoon. Um, and, uh, with this
00:24:57.820
huge yellow, orange face. Okay. Just, can I just say Asia relax? Okay. We're good. We don't need any
00:25:07.740
more deadly plagues for now. So you've supplied us with two this year. It's only May. So maybe just
00:25:15.420
take a break, give us a break, start thinking of what you want to do in 2021. I know you'll have a gift
00:25:21.880
for us then, but for right now, if you could just lay off, please. Um, now I thought the good news
00:25:29.160
for me as a beekeeper is that I have a beekeeping suit that will keep me safe. And now all I have to
00:25:34.480
do is wear my surgical mask and my beekeeper suit wherever I go. And I'm protected from both
00:25:39.200
plagues. But then I read this in the same article as Washington state agricultural officials
00:25:43.740
are asking beekeepers and residents to report any sightings of the giant hornets,
00:25:47.000
but don't get too close. It's sting can penetrate a regular beekeeper suit. Perfect. And state
00:25:53.240
scientists had to order special reinforced suits. Okay. Then I got to go get one of those. Um,
00:25:59.400
entomologist Chris Looney says, don't try to take them out yourself. If you see them,
00:26:03.180
I mean, if you see a giant murder hornet and you're inclined to try to take it out,
00:26:08.400
go to do some hand in hand, hand, uh, combat. Don't, don't try it. If you get into them, um,
00:26:13.800
run away, then call us. It is really important for us to know of every sighting. If we're going
00:26:18.300
to have any hope of eradication. All right. Um, number three, Lisa Bloom is a lawyer and a big
00:26:24.660
me too proponent. She was really involved in trying to get, uh, Trump accusers to come forward.
00:26:31.400
And of course she was out against Kavanaugh and everything else. And now she has finally chimed in
00:26:35.860
on the Joe Biden situation. Here's what she had to say. She said, I believe you, Tara Reid,
00:26:40.420
you have people who remember you, uh, told them about this decades ago. We know he is quote,
00:26:45.960
handsy. You're not asking for money. You've obviously struggled mightily with this.
00:26:51.440
I still have to fight Trump. So I will support Joe, but I believe you and I am sorry.
00:26:57.660
So Lisa Bloom, the, uh, victim's advocate is saying, this is what she's saying.
00:27:03.840
Uh, I believe you were raped, but I still support your rapist. I mean, that is a, that's a hell of
00:27:11.460
a position to take, but the thing is that is a, as despicable and deranged and morally debased as
00:27:20.740
that position is, it is far more respectable from then, than what most, most leftists and me too
00:27:27.140
people are doing. Cause at least it's honest. Okay. It has the benefit of being honest. What she's
00:27:32.120
saying is I believe you. I think it happened, but it's more advantageous for me politically to
00:27:37.060
support your rapist. So, uh, I'm going to support him. That's what she's saying. Like I said, morally
00:27:43.440
deranged, but honest. Um, and so that puts it above all the other leftists who are just wholesale
00:27:51.940
abandoning all the me too talking points they've been using for years now and, uh, and attacking
00:27:57.120
Terry and trying to tear down her credibility and everything else. So Lisa Bloom is getting a lot
00:28:02.280
of grief for this and I understand why deservedly. So, but, uh, like I said, she's being honest at
00:28:06.800
least. So give her some credit for that, I guess. Reading now from the daily wire, um, or no, I'm
00:28:13.300
sorry, the daily mail. I can't believe I would confuse those two. The daily wire, the daily mail
00:28:17.360
are not similar at all. Anyway, this is a daily mail says hundreds of people have been exposed for,
00:28:21.480
for reporting people who have flouted social distancing rules. And some are now scared. They could
00:28:26.600
receive a backlash. The names and addresses of approximately 900 people in Missouri were
00:28:31.380
released as part of a media request under the sunshine law, which allows for the release of
00:28:35.500
information submitted to a public agency. St. Louis County had urged the community to share details
00:28:40.840
of anyone not following guidelines in response to the coronavirus pandemic and noted in the terms
00:28:45.200
of conditions that information may be shared publicly. However, some people may not have read the
00:28:49.800
small print and submitted the tips via online and now their information's out there. Oh, I mean,
00:28:55.200
I just feel terrible for them. Don't you really, really horrible. Sorry about your luck there.
00:28:59.940
I just really terrible tragedy. You tried to snitch on your neighbors and thought you're being,
00:29:04.840
you're doing it privately. And now, and now the, uh, the sunshine law has snitched on you.
00:29:09.480
You're being snitched on for snitching. Just that's no, no, that's a, that's not justice at all.
00:29:15.760
Is it? That's just a terrible, terrible thing. That's all I'll say about that. Uh, five.
00:29:21.420
And finally, Alex Jones last week had some interesting thoughts to share. Uh, listen to this.
00:29:27.160
I'll admit it. I will eat my neighbors. I'm not letting my kids die. I'm just going to be honest.
00:29:34.580
My superpower is being honest. I've extrapolated this out and I won't have to for a few years
00:29:39.780
since I got food and stuff, but I'm literally looking at my neighbors now and going, I'm ready
00:29:44.100
to hang them up and gut them and skin them and chop them up. And you know what? I'm ready.
00:29:47.480
My daughters aren't starving to death. I'll eat my neighbors. See, my superpower is being honest.
00:29:53.160
I'll eat your ass. I will. I'm combat model, optimum self-sufficiency, probably the leader.
00:30:01.460
The point is, is have you thought about that yet? Because I'm somebody that thought I could fix this
00:30:06.980
and I'm starting to think about having to eat my neighbors. You think I like sizing up my neighbor,
00:30:13.780
how I'm going to haul him up by a chain and chop his ass up. I'll do it. My children aren't going hungry.
00:30:21.220
I will eat your ass. And that's why I want the globalists to know I will eat your ass first.
00:30:28.820
Honestly, I can't judge Alex Jones because that's exactly what I sound like when it's been two hours
00:30:34.460
since my last snack. I can't count how many times I've said exactly this. I just feel a little bad
00:30:40.620
for Alex Jones's neighbors. You know, you know, they were frantically on Zillow over the weekend
00:30:46.140
looking for new living arrangements. Then again, you know, I thought that, but then I thought,
00:30:50.440
well, given that they live next to Alex Jones, they were probably prepared for this contingency.
00:30:56.200
They probably had like a go bag packed, ready to make a run for it. They knew this day was coming
00:31:01.920
and it came. So that's Alex Jones for you. Before we go any further, I got to tell you about this.
00:31:10.440
It's very important because our amazing deal that we've been talking about for weeks now
00:31:14.420
is going away tomorrow. This is your last chance. When you become a Daily Wire Insider Plus or All
00:31:20.320
Access member, you get not just one Tumblr, but two of them. The most highly coveted beverage vessel
00:31:29.300
in existence. You get two of them, but this is the last day for the deal. Okay. It's going away.
00:31:33.420
And on top of that, you also get many other amazing benefits as well, including of course,
00:31:38.640
as well as the Leftist Tears Tumblr. You also get an ad-free website experience. You get access to
00:31:43.620
all of our live broadcasts, the full show library. You get full three hours of Ben Shapiro.
00:31:49.400
You get access to the mailbag. You get his exclusive election insight op-eds. You got to be a member for
00:31:55.020
that. And then we do these all access shows that are a lot of fun. In fact, I'll be doing one tonight
00:32:01.380
at 8 p.m. Eastern, 5 p.m. Pacific. But if you're a member, you can also take part in those. If you're
00:32:06.980
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Insider Plus or all access member, and you get 10% off with coupon code Walsh. Just head on over to
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dailywire.com slash subscribe. That's dailywire.com slash subscribe. Coupon code Walsh. Get both
00:32:32.140
Tumblrs now before it's too late. And finally, for our daily cancellation, I have to cancel my son,
00:32:40.520
my oldest son, heir to the throne. I have to cancel. I hate to cancel him, but he's left me no choice.
00:32:45.960
Let me explain what happened. So a few days ago, I took the kids out for a walk in the park,
00:32:49.720
and we're still allowed to do that here. Magnanimously, our governor has, through his great
00:32:54.360
benevolence, has allowed us to walk outside for limited periods, okay, and for only approved
00:32:58.680
reasons. But we were on the approved list, so we were out. And my son, at one point, he walked too
00:33:06.040
close to a tree, and a tree branch scratched his neck, and he was bleeding a little bit.
00:33:12.520
So I sensed an opportunity, and I had a brilliant idea. I told him, when we get home, I didn't think
00:33:19.220
this would actually work. But I said, when we get home, I told him he should tell mommy that he got
00:33:24.700
attacked and bitten by a squirrel. And that's what the scratch came from. And I told him, if he sells
00:33:31.600
it, and his sister was there, she was also going to help. She was going to back up the story. I said,
00:33:37.320
if he really sells it, he might be able to fool mommy, and that will be funny. So we get home,
00:33:42.020
the kids run in ahead of me, and they're super excited to lie to their mother at the behest of
00:33:45.700
their father, because I'm just a great parent, and this is the kind of thing I tell my kids to do.
00:33:50.580
And so anyway, they go up, and I knew the plan worked, because before I could even walk upstairs,
00:33:56.460
all I heard coming from upstairs was, what? A squirrel? You might have rabies. And then I walk
00:34:03.040
up, and my wife is freaking out, and she's saying that we need to call the doctor immediately. And my
00:34:09.480
kids actually sold it better than I did, because seeing this reaction, it worked way better than I
00:34:14.620
thought it would. And I only made it about 15 seconds before I started laughing, and the jig
00:34:19.080
was up. I gave up the whole thing. My wife was not amused at all, but the reason my son is canceled
00:34:27.860
is that even though it was a brilliant performance on his part, but the problem is that he also started
00:34:34.700
freaking out. I thought at first he was acting, and I was really impressed. I thought, we got to get
00:34:39.780
this kid. I'm never in favor of child actors, but I thought, this kid has a gift, because he
00:34:44.400
started freaking out and crying that he might have rabies. And so I thought he was acting and really
00:34:49.360
selling it. But then I realized that, no, because my wife said you might have rabies, he thought that
00:34:57.640
he might have rabies now. And even though we made up the story about the squirrel, as he well knew.
00:35:05.160
So he was scratched by a tree branch. We came up with this story, and then he fooled himself with
00:35:13.180
the story and started crying, because he thought he'd have to go to the doctors for rabies. So then
00:35:17.260
my wife was able to flip it around on me and say, look, oh great, look what you've done. Look to our
00:35:21.520
poor child, you've made him cry. And I tried to explain, the plan was to upset her, not to upset our
00:35:26.900
child, but that didn't make it any better. It's not my fault. The kid tried to prank his mom and
00:35:33.960
instead pranked himself in the process. So for falling for his own prank and getting me in
00:35:39.520
trouble, my son is canceled. Like I said, not something any father wants to do, but he leaves
00:35:45.840
me no choice. And I by no means accept any responsibility for any of this, even though I
00:35:52.320
did tell my kids to go lie to their mom and try to scare her into thinking that her son was bitten
00:35:57.040
by a rabid squirrel. It was good stuff. My daughter, though, I got to say, she was very
00:36:05.360
impressive. She kept a straight face the entire time. They're only six years old, twins. And
00:36:10.720
at first I was impressed, and then I was very afraid, because I thought she's six years old
00:36:15.780
and she's this good at lying. We're in trouble down the line. But anyway, might as well get
00:36:22.200
some enjoyment out of it while we can. And we will leave it there on that somewhat somber
00:36:27.460
note. Hope you guys have a great day. Talk to you tomorrow. Godspeed.
00:36:34.200
If you enjoyed this episode, don't forget to subscribe. And if you want to help spread the
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word, please give us a five-star review. Tell your friends to subscribe as well. We're available
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00:36:50.420
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00:36:54.680
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00:36:59.680
Our technical producer is Austin Stevens, edited by Danny D'Amico, and our audio is mixed by Robin
00:37:05.340
Fenderson. The Matt Wall Show is a Daily Wire production, copyright Daily Wire 2020.
00:37:11.040
As American psycho Gavin Newsom locked down his political opponent's beaches in one of the few
00:37:15.440
conservative counties in California, your humble correspondent broke the law to lounge
00:37:20.300
in the sun. The lockdown authoritarians don't have any arguments anymore to defend their draconian
00:37:25.060
policies, but that isn't the point. The cruelty is the point. Then, Joe Biden blows it when addressing
00:37:30.820
sexual assault allegations against him, but it won't matter. Feminism dies with a tweet, and Hollywood
00:37:35.920
tries to rewrite the history of one of the most important women in the history of the conservative
00:37:39.720
movement. All that and more. Check it out on The Michael Knowles Show.