The Matt Walsh Show - Matt Walsh Reviews Beyonce's ＂JOLENE＂ Cover [Weekly Walsh Original]

00:00:00.000 And every once in a while, I'll take a position that I realize is risky.

00:00:03.260 Even while I'm saying it out loud on camera,

00:00:05.240 I am conscious of the fact that I may well come to regret having said what I'm saying.

00:00:09.240 You might argue that it makes me imprudent and reckless to say something publicly

00:00:12.360 that I know I might soon wish I didn't say.

00:00:14.240 Or you might argue that it makes me courageous.

00:00:16.160 At least I'll try to argue the latter case, but the former is probably more true most of the time.

00:00:20.760 That took courage, my friend.

00:00:21.840 Either way, the problem with venturing out onto a precarious limb, of course,

00:00:25.140 is that the limb might snap and send you hurtling down to the forest floor.

00:00:28.580 And that is what happened to me after I publicly stated a few weeks ago

00:00:31.740 that Beyonce's new country song wasn't that bad.

00:00:34.480 Well, there's your problem right there.

00:00:36.500 I didn't say that it was good objectively.

00:00:37.980 I didn't say that I would be putting it on my Spotify playlist.

00:00:40.340 I just said it wasn't terrible.

00:00:42.300 It was catchy.

00:00:43.200 It was kind of not awful.

00:00:45.000 It wasn't much of a ringing endorsement,

00:00:46.600 but it was the closest thing to an endorsement that I've ever given Beyonce.

00:00:49.660 And so it was inevitable that I would live to rue the day

00:00:52.280 that I vaguely praised one of her songs, sort of.

00:00:54.620 And in fact, she's made me regret it multiple times in the intervening weeks,

00:00:57.460 but the real catastrophe struck when Beyonce released her new country album

00:01:01.220 and one of the other songs on that album.

00:01:04.480 And it's Beyonce's rendition of the classic Dolly Parton hit, Jolene.

00:01:08.380 If you're a red-blooded American, then you are well familiar with the original song.

00:01:11.620 It is Dolly's mournful plea to the woman, Jolene, who is trying to steal her man. 0.86

00:01:17.200 Your beauty is beyond compare with flaming locks of auburn hair with ivory skin

00:01:22.520 and eyes of emerald green.

00:01:27.660 Your smile is like a breath of spring.

00:01:30.280 Your voice is soft like summer rain.

00:01:32.500 And I cannot compete with you, Jolene.

00:01:36.240 Now, what makes this song unique and interesting,

00:01:38.760 which has caused it to resonate over the five decades since it was made,

00:01:41.600 is the vulnerability and the heartbreak and the longing in the lyrics and the performance.

00:01:46.680 Dolly Parton is insecure, fearful, desperately in love with a man 0.97

00:01:49.820 who she believes she cannot afford to lose.

00:01:51.580 Those opening lyrics are iconic because of how they kind of invert expectations.

00:01:55.200 She's singing to the woman who is trying to break up her relationship,

00:01:57.940 but instead of attacking her, she praises her rival's beauty.

00:02:01.000 And already there's more poetry in those opening lines

00:02:03.140 than in every Beyonce song ever written.

00:02:04.900 Now, when I heard that Beyonce was covering the song,

00:02:09.680 I, of course, knew that her cover wouldn't get within a thousand miles of Dolly's original.

00:02:14.220 Beyonce just doesn't have the soul and gravitas to do a song like that any justice. 1.00

00:02:17.480 But at the same time, in a weird way, I was initially impressed with the idea.

00:02:21.080 Because after all, it is a very tender, very feminine song

00:02:23.740 expressing deep insecurity and vulnerability.

00:02:26.500 And Beyonce just doesn't make songs like that. 1.00

00:02:28.160 So this seemed to be an interesting departure.

00:02:30.980 But then I listened to Beyonce's version.

00:02:33.520 Here's a little bit of it.

00:02:34.900 Oh, well, there you go.

00:02:58.600 Just when you think that Beyonce might be growing ever so slightly as an artist and a person,

00:03:03.600 she proves you wrong.

00:03:04.660 It turns out that she has taken this song,

00:03:06.300 full of pain and yearning and emotional honesty,

00:03:08.920 and turned it into yet another mediocre girl boss anthem. 1.00

00:03:12.120 Who runs the world?

00:03:13.440 Girl! 0.97

00:03:14.120 Who runs the world?

00:03:15.400 She has, in other words, taken everything that makes the song great

00:03:18.300 and replaced it with everything that makes modern pop music terrible.

00:03:21.700 Now, in Beyonce's molestation of the original,

00:03:23.500 she sings,

00:03:23.900 your beautiful beyond compare takes more than beauty and seductive stares

00:03:26.320 to come between a family and a happy man.

00:03:27.720 Jolene, I'm a woman too.

00:03:28.900 The games you play are nothing new,

00:03:30.100 so you don't want no heat with me, Jolene.

00:03:31.900 And later she adds,

00:03:33.320 but you don't want this smoke, 1.00

00:03:34.260 so shoot your shot with someone else. 1.00

00:03:35.460 And then sings, 1.00

00:03:36.460 Jolene, I know I'm a queen, Jolene. 1.00

00:03:38.240 I'm still a Creole banjee bitch from Louisiana. 1.00

00:03:40.760 Don't try me. 1.00

00:03:42.120 And finally she warns, 0.99

00:03:43.280 I'd hate to have to act a fool. 0.99

00:03:44.660 Not classy. 0.99

00:03:45.620 Not classy at all.

00:03:47.240 De class A.

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00:05:06.640 The problem with this new version,

00:05:07.980 aside from the fact that the performance is flat

00:05:09.960 and uninteresting, 0.99

00:05:11.480 the lyrics are clunky and kind of stupid, 0.99

00:05:13.620 and that Beyonce has ripped the song's heart 1.00

00:05:16.020 out of its chest and eaten it

00:05:17.360 like some kind of nightmarish Aztec ritual.

00:05:19.900 The problem is that it lacks the vulnerability

00:05:21.980 of the original song.

00:05:24.200 In the original,

00:05:25.240 Dolly Parton is desperate. 0.98

00:05:26.820 She's worried.

00:05:27.400 She's anxious.

00:05:28.040 She's lying awake at night

00:05:29.100 listening to the man in bed next to her

00:05:30.740 as he dreams about a woman

00:05:32.380 more beautiful than herself.

00:05:34.140 In Beyonce's version,

00:05:35.440 she's a confident queen.

00:05:36.780 She's unbothered.

00:05:37.800 She's tough and independent

00:05:38.960 and perfect and wonderful and unafraid,

00:05:41.240 and her man would never cheat on her anyway.

00:05:42.760 Which, if that's the case,

00:05:44.700 then why should anyone even care about the story

00:05:47.160 you're telling us in the song?

00:05:49.380 Beyonce's the greatest.

00:05:50.280 She's a queen. 0.97

00:05:50.900 She's perfect.

00:05:51.480 Everything's perfect.

00:05:52.160 So who cares?

00:05:53.680 Your boasts are not interesting. 0.89

00:05:55.740 Boring.

00:05:56.700 They are also not relatable

00:05:58.200 to the rest of us mere mortals.

00:06:00.920 Beyonce is a strong, confident queen,

00:06:03.240 she claims.

00:06:03.760 This is your queen?

00:06:04.720 Well, the rest of us are human beings.

00:06:06.100 We're not kings and queens.

00:06:07.020 We're just, we're people.

00:06:08.120 Music at its best

00:06:09.140 expresses those universal human experiences.

00:06:11.940 But Beyonce's music 0.58

00:06:12.880 expresses nothing more

00:06:14.280 than how awesome

00:06:15.020 Beyonce thinks Beyonce is.

00:06:16.780 I'm Beyonce.

00:06:17.580 I am Beyonce always.

00:06:18.820 I can't think of anything

00:06:19.600 less interesting

00:06:20.760 than listening to a famous rich person

00:06:23.080 sing songs about how great they are.

00:06:25.700 But the thing is,

00:06:26.540 it isn't even true.

00:06:27.860 And that's the biggest problem

00:06:28.800 with just about every song

00:06:30.000 she's ever made

00:06:30.900 and with much of modern popular music generally.

00:06:33.040 It just isn't true.

00:06:35.120 It's not saying anything true

00:06:36.740 about the human experience.

00:06:38.540 It's not connecting

00:06:39.400 with anything real inside us.

00:06:41.340 Because the truth is

00:06:42.400 that any woman,

00:06:44.000 okay,

00:06:44.320 Beyonce included,

00:06:45.820 any woman

00:06:46.400 who sees another woman,

00:06:47.720 a beautiful,

00:06:48.520 radiant woman,

00:06:49.080 Absolutely.

00:06:50.040 hitting on her boyfriend

00:06:50.880 or her husband

00:06:51.420 will at some level

00:06:53.140 feel insecure and threatened.

00:06:55.080 Not.

00:06:55.540 Like no woman 1.00

00:06:56.520 would just wave that off

00:06:57.800 and say,

00:06:58.300 Whatever,

00:06:58.620 I'm a badass queen.

00:06:59.480 No man would ever leave me.

00:07:00.740 Now she might say that out loud perhaps,

00:07:02.420 but deep in her heart

00:07:03.460 she'll have doubts.

00:07:04.580 In fact,

00:07:05.020 it would have been interesting

00:07:06.160 if Beyonce's version

00:07:07.540 began

00:07:08.440 with the blustery confidence,

00:07:10.640 but then as the song went on

00:07:11.880 the cracks start to show

00:07:13.180 and she reveals herself

00:07:14.580 to be insecure

00:07:15.300 and anxious

00:07:15.720 about the situation.

00:07:16.980 That would have been

00:07:17.420 a smart artistic direction

00:07:18.920 to take it.

00:07:19.400 Write that down,

00:07:19.940 write that down.

00:07:20.480 But Beyonce has no capacity 0.97

00:07:22.620 for creativity

00:07:23.320 and has none of the

00:07:24.320 artistic intelligence

00:07:25.160 or honesty

00:07:25.620 to even conceive

00:07:26.760 of something like that.

00:07:27.820 But if it appeals

00:07:28.400 to those women

00:07:28.980 or men,

00:07:30.060 it's not because

00:07:30.920 they relate to

00:07:31.600 Beyonce's corny

00:07:32.660 feminist bravado,

00:07:34.380 but because they want

00:07:35.440 to relate to it.

00:07:36.460 That's the whole reason

00:07:37.120 people like to listen

00:07:37.920 to rappers and pop stars

00:07:39.120 brag about themselves.

00:07:40.280 It's because they,

00:07:41.320 the listeners,

00:07:42.360 want to feel

00:07:43.740 as arrogant

00:07:44.560 and self-assured 1.00

00:07:45.660 as those rappers

00:07:46.420 and pop stars

00:07:47.000 pretend to feel

00:07:47.800 about themselves.

00:07:48.680 And in reality,

00:07:49.420 Beyonce,

00:07:49.740 Beyonce is so

00:07:51.160 incredibly insecure

00:07:52.060 that she's won

00:07:53.540 like 32 Grammys

00:07:54.620 but still whines

00:07:56.260 because she hasn't

00:07:56.840 won album of the year.

00:07:57.680 She has more Grammys

00:07:58.500 than everyone

00:07:58.980 and never won album

00:07:59.920 in a year.

00:08:00.480 So even by your own

00:08:01.500 metrics,

00:08:01.940 that doesn't work.

00:08:02.800 She's won more awards

00:08:04.540 at the Grammys

00:08:05.180 than any artist

00:08:06.160 in history

00:08:07.080 and it's not enough.

00:08:08.980 That's how desperate

00:08:09.920 for affirmation

00:08:10.640 and approval

00:08:11.060 she really is.

00:08:13.100 And you know what?

00:08:13.660 That would be

00:08:14.280 an interesting subject

00:08:15.120 for a song.

00:08:15.740 If Beyonce explored

00:08:16.820 the fact

00:08:17.300 that she has praised

00:08:18.720 the world over

00:08:19.460 showered with money

00:08:21.320 and fame

00:08:22.040 and critical acclaim

00:08:22.800 and yet she still 0.79

00:08:24.060 hungers for approval.

00:08:25.540 That would be interesting.

00:08:27.160 I would listen

00:08:27.660 to a song like that.

00:08:28.780 That's the kind of thing

00:08:29.500 a real artist

00:08:30.400 who has the courage

00:08:32.280 to be vulnerable

00:08:33.340 and honest

00:08:35.380 might be able

00:08:36.780 to explore.

00:08:37.560 But Beyonce

00:08:38.000 is not a real artist. 0.99

00:08:38.980 She's a mediocre hack. 1.00

00:08:40.240 She's been making music

00:08:41.000 for 25 years

00:08:41.940 and during that entire time

00:08:43.580 she's never managed

00:08:44.420 to say one interesting

00:08:46.060 or insightful thing

00:08:47.160 ever.

00:08:48.220 She's bland 0.83

00:08:48.920 and dull 1.00

00:08:49.640 and arrogant 0.99

00:08:50.220 and also frankly 0.98

00:08:51.160 not a very good singer.

00:08:52.260 And that is why

00:08:52.900 she is today

00:08:53.900 cancel.

00:08:55.060 and I think

00:08:55.880 will continue to do

00:08:56.920 together for 3 minutes.

00:08:57.420 на

00:09:00.600 Hal

00:09:05.240 sheby

00:09:05.960 sheby

00:09:06.880 sheby

00:09:07.660 sheby

The Matt Walsh Show - April 06, 2024

Matt Walsh Reviews Beyonce's ＂JOLENE＂ Cover [Weekly Walsh Original]

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