The Matt Walsh Show - ＂My Friend Is TOO NICE At The Gym.＂ - Matt Walsh Answers AITA Questions

00:00:00.000 I've been accepted into your culture. Your chief inscribed his name on me.

00:00:04.520 Wow!

00:00:05.260 Well, I must get back to repairing my ship.

00:00:11.660 Well, let's get into some, uh, am I the a-hole questions here.

00:00:15.120 Beth says, here's an interesting question for you.

00:00:17.400 I have a straight guy friend who said that he would be open to dating a bisexual woman.

00:00:21.540 It's not that he's seeking a bisexual partner, just that if the right girl came around and she happened to be bisexual, it wouldn't be a showstopper. 0.60

00:00:27.560 As a conservative and a Catholic, I think this is wrong and a recipe for disaster.

00:00:30.840 My friend is not strong in any religious or political beliefs, so instead of using that basis to defend my position,

00:00:35.260 I said that if his partner is fond of intimate relationships with other women, then he alone will never be able to fulfill her desires.

00:00:41.380 In his opinion, a straight woman can have impulses for other men, just like a bisexual woman can have impulses for both men and women.

00:00:47.280 He thinks as long as they don't act out on the impulse, there's no difference between the two. 0.66

00:00:50.880 Am I the a-hole for telling my friend he's slightly psychotic for being open to dating a bisexual woman? 0.99

00:00:55.460 No, you're not the a-hole because you're right. 0.98

00:00:58.540 And in my opinion, in my opinion, you can't be the a-hole when you're right. 0.99

00:01:02.520 You're not the a-hole.

00:01:03.760 That's your automatic get out of, well, I was going to say it's your automatic get out of the a-hole free card.

00:01:09.640 Stop right there, I can't hear this, but keep going.

00:01:11.940 Get out of being the a-hole free card is what I should say.

00:01:14.500 That gets you out of that jam every time.

00:01:17.160 Now, a lot of people disagree with that. 0.99

00:01:18.140 They say that it's possible to be right, but also a jerk about it. 0.98

00:01:20.740 So I realize I'm a minority there. 0.98

00:01:22.200 That said, psychotic is maybe overstating the case slightly.

00:01:27.300 I think misguided is what I would say.

00:01:29.720 Ian says, I'm an avid gym goer.

00:01:32.260 A few months ago, I was approached by a friend who wanted me to teach him how to lift

00:01:35.580 and to help him get in shape so he could be a better man, father, husband.

00:01:39.140 He's a good friend, so I agreed, and we've been working out every morning since.

00:01:42.340 Here's my dilemma.

00:01:43.360 This man is the nicest person I've ever met.

00:01:45.380 He's constantly smiling and talks like he's a librarian or a kindergarten teacher.

00:01:49.100 He'll walk up to guys who have just finished a set and tell them,

00:01:52.180 good job, that was amazing.

00:01:53.540 Some guys are cool about it, but some I can see are starting to avoid him.

00:01:56.520 He doesn't care.

00:01:57.040 He'll wave and smile, get openly eye contact, dodged,

00:02:00.080 and then he'll just walk himself into the guy's direct line of sight to wave and smile again.

00:02:04.400 At this point, he's unavoidable, and the conversation is usually,

00:02:07.160 how long have you been working out?

00:02:08.260 How can I look as good as you do one day?

00:02:10.020 How's your mom?

00:02:11.680 Well, I'll just take a sidebar there.

00:02:13.840 I understand he's a nice guy, but that could really be taken the wrong way.

00:02:17.160 If you're going up to someone at the gym and you don't know them,

00:02:20.940 and you say, hey, how's your mom doing?

00:02:22.280 Who invited that kid?

00:02:23.580 That could really be misinterpreted, so I'd be careful with that.

00:02:26.560 He's clearly starting to bother people, and I'm clearly affiliated with him.

00:02:30.280 Am I the a-hole for wanting to tell him to lock it up and just be normal?

00:02:33.720 Act normal.

00:02:35.260 Go on, go, go, go, go.

00:02:36.100 It's my opinion that the gym is a place where you just get in, get your stuff done, and get out.

00:02:39.800 It doesn't feel like it needs to be a social event.

00:02:41.960 Well, your opinion is the correct one.

00:02:44.900 You're not the a-hole.

00:02:46.060 The rule for gyms, you know, it's not quite as strict as the rule for a men's bathroom.

00:02:51.120 Look, I don't know about women, you know, they go into the bathroom together, 1.00

00:02:54.480 and it's like a social event.

00:02:55.540 For men, that's not the case.

00:02:56.640 We don't talk to each other.

00:02:57.400 We don't look at each other.

00:02:58.280 No small talk.

00:02:59.180 No acknowledgement.

00:03:00.200 I don't care if you're in the bathroom, and you see, like, your long-lost brother

00:03:03.940 who's been stranded on a desert island for the last three years, like in Castoy,

00:03:08.020 and you see him in the bathroom.

00:03:09.520 Like, you can't acknowledge him there.

00:03:11.160 Wait till you get outside.

00:03:12.040 So what I'm saying is, it's not quite to that level when you're out in the gym itself,

00:03:16.080 but it's close.

00:03:17.500 It's like, it's almost there.

00:03:19.220 You don't want to get unsolicited advice.

00:03:20.700 Unless you see someone doing something that's, like, dangerous,

00:03:23.000 and they can hurt themselves, you feel like you need to.

00:03:24.500 Especially if the gym has become a big part of this guy's life, you want to talk to him

00:03:30.660 about it.

00:03:31.040 The other thing is, people at the gym are nice.

00:03:33.400 You know, I think if you've never been to the gym before, you have this, maybe some impression

00:03:37.060 that people are going to be, I don't know, people are going to be aggressive or judgmental.

00:03:42.080 Planet Fitness, their whole deal is, oh, it's the judgment-free zone.

00:03:44.820 But that's really, that's like any gym you go to.

00:03:47.160 Nobody, nobody cares.

00:03:48.240 No one's like, no one's, you know, paying attention to you.

00:03:50.740 Unless you go to one of these gyms where there's a woman on TikTok who's, like, filming and 0.99

00:03:54.540 setting a trap.

00:03:55.220 Aside from those kinds of situations.

00:03:57.040 But you still want to let, leave people alone, basically.

00:03:59.860 Let them do their thing.

00:04:00.940 So I would communicate that to him.

00:04:03.120 Have you ever read the fine print that appears when you start browsing in incognito mode?

00:04:06.540 It says that your activity might still be visible to your employer, your school, your

00:04:10.140 internet service provider.

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00:04:14.920 I do and use ExpressVPN.

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00:04:54.040 From Anonymous.

00:04:55.440 Hello, Matt.

00:04:55.860 About a year ago, I was talking with this girl, but we stopped being friends because

00:04:58.860 we had a fight.

00:04:59.620 We were talking over text and I forgot how it came up, but she said that she believes

00:05:02.820 that fairies exist. 1.00

00:05:04.160 That's it.

00:05:05.300 I don't remember her argument exactly, but I believe that she said that fairies are actually

00:05:08.480 invisible like ghosts.

00:05:09.620 The only way you can see them is if you know how to see people's auras. 0.97

00:05:12.940 And she said that she trained herself to read and see people's auras.

00:05:15.780 So I guess she's seen these fairies before. 1.00

00:05:18.880 How can you prove?

00:05:19.620 There could be invisible fairies. 1.00

00:05:20.780 You can't prove that.

00:05:21.400 She explained how you would see the fairies' auras, but I didn't really understand her explanation.

00:05:28.880 She started talking about the earth's vibrations during her explanation.

00:05:31.860 But like I said, I wasn't really following.

00:05:33.360 We then awkwardly moved on to reincarnation for some reason.

00:05:36.180 She asked if I believed in it.

00:05:37.460 I said, no, I don't.

00:05:38.360 I'm Christian.

00:05:38.800 She said, I'm also Christian, but I believe in reincarnation.

00:05:41.020 I asked her how she believes in reincarnation while claiming to be a Christian. 0.89

00:05:44.100 And she said she thinks God gives you a second chance if he thinks that you still have a

00:05:47.220 lesson to learn.

00:05:48.080 This quickly turned into an argument.

00:05:49.440 She started to get very upset with me. 0.99

00:05:50.900 She told me that I was being a jerk and that I was being too critical about her beliefs. 0.97

00:05:54.340 In her defense, I was being a little harsh, but my patience was pretty much gone at that 0.99

00:05:57.320 point.

00:05:57.840 The next day, she didn't want to be friends with me anymore because it seemed like I didn't

00:06:01.360 see the whole picture.

00:06:02.300 She then proceeded to say that I'm a nice guy with good qualities, but I need to work on myself

00:06:05.900 still.

00:06:07.000 The person who believes in invisible fairies that you can see with the aid of the earth's 0.99

00:06:11.120 vibration is saying, you need to work on yourself. 0.97

00:06:13.380 She's crazy. 0.60

00:06:16.560 I'm currently in my senior year of high school and I sometimes see her on campus.

00:06:19.580 One time we were walking past each other and she glanced at me and then quickly looked 0.87

00:06:23.200 away trying to ignore me.

00:06:24.500 It was very awkward.

00:06:25.420 What are your thoughts on all this?

00:06:26.320 Am I the a-hole in this situation?

00:06:27.440 If you were me, what would you say to this girl?

00:06:29.180 Well, I wouldn't say anything to her at this point.

00:06:30.860 Like, maybe you were a little aggressive in how you responded to these claims of hers.

00:06:36.020 And your only mistake really was to even get into the argument.

00:06:38.300 It's like, if someone's talking about invisible fairies and auras and everything, you're not

00:06:42.460 going to be able to.

00:06:43.160 This is a totally unfalsifiable and there's probably not a lot you could say.

00:06:46.720 You're not the a-hole.

00:06:47.940 It's hard enough to be respectful of someone's viewpoint when you have a disagreement, even

00:06:51.600 when their viewpoint is even like vaguely respectable.

00:06:54.700 But when they believe the craziest thing you've ever heard, especially in the moment, you can't

00:06:59.720 be held responsible for reacting.

00:07:01.360 There's a good chance that this is only the tip of the crazy iceberg with this girl.

00:07:04.860 And so, you know, it's probably for the best to just move on.

00:07:09.360 Finally, from Ray says,

00:07:10.560 My husband and I recently moved our four children under five to Utah from Alaska.

00:07:14.680 My husband grew up in Alaska and his parents and one sister still live there.

00:07:17.940 His family is very nice, but his mom and him don't get along and his mom is a big lib.

00:07:22.140 She was only vaguely approving when we had our third child and outright asked, weren't

00:07:25.320 you going to wait?

00:07:26.240 We moved because the extremely long dark winters were really getting to me and my husband makes

00:07:30.580 more money here so I can stay home with the kids.

00:07:32.680 But before we left, she screamed at me in front of my kids that I'm a child abuser for disciplining 0.99

00:07:36.660 my four-year-old.

00:07:37.740 She went on a rant about timeout being traumatizing, that she was smart enough to use daycare when

00:07:42.800 she was young so she wouldn't need to resort to timeout.

00:07:45.300 Oh, real smart.

00:07:46.120 Oh, yeah, I farmed all the childcare out to somebody else, so I didn't have to do anything.

00:07:49.260 That's how smart I was.

00:07:50.360 I was good and told her firmly but kindly that she was out of place and that we would be

00:07:53.700 leaving as this event took place at her house.

00:07:55.640 She now constantly is messaging us for my husband and my oldest to come and visit.

00:07:59.100 I won't let my son go up without me to visit because I don't know if she'd be whispering

00:08:02.760 poison in his ear.

00:08:03.960 I know he really likes her.

00:08:05.600 My husband thinks I might be overreacting, but I'm still extremely hesitant.

00:08:08.640 Am I the a-hole for refusing to let my four-year-old go see her in another state without me? 0.91

00:08:12.000 She's on board with the crazy transgender train for kids, so I get so terrified she's 1.00

00:08:16.120 going to try something insane. 0.98

00:08:17.720 If you're wondering, I don't know that my husband would even notice if she was whispering

00:08:20.940 crazy stuff to my little boy since he tries to be in a different room from her when they're

00:08:24.700 in the same house.

00:08:25.620 No, you are also absolved.

00:08:27.280 You're absolved of all a-hole guilt.

00:08:30.620 You're not the a-hole.

00:08:31.900 Yelling at you and accusing you of child abuse?

00:08:33.960 Is maybe not an unforgivable offense, but it's a serious offense.

00:08:38.360 Doing that in front of your kids, so she's undermining you already in front of your kids, 0.99

00:08:42.800 undermining your authority and your punishment, and calling you a child abuser in front of

00:08:47.280 your children.

00:08:49.600 That alone, you know, you would be justified for not wanting to be around her at all.

00:08:53.980 If that were me, family members screamed at me in front of my kids and called me a child

00:08:58.060 abuser.

00:08:58.320 I don't think I'd be around that person, maybe ever again.

00:09:00.780 And I'm not saying that should be the case for you and you need to cut her out of your

00:09:03.540 life completely, but that is the kind of thing that it's just a line you don't cross.

00:09:08.880 So I don't think you're wrong.

00:09:09.760 And then you add in the trans stuff. 0.86

00:09:11.220 That's a real concern as well.

00:09:12.340 It does mean that if someone is on board with that, certainly for me, it means I know I can't

00:09:18.860 trust them around my kid.

00:09:20.040 So you're not the a-hole.

00:09:21.440 All three people may go in peace.

00:09:25.200 Hey, wait a minute, what happened?

00:09:26.700 What happens next?

00:09:27.660 Come on, let's see the next episode.

The Matt Walsh Show - July 22, 2023

＂My Friend Is TOO NICE At The Gym.＂ - Matt Walsh Answers AITA Questions

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