The Matt Walsh Show - ＂My Sister Betrayed Me, But AITA？＂ Matt Walsh Responds

00:00:00.000 All right, it's Am I the Asshole Day on the Matt Walsh Show.

00:00:03.420 And we've got a couple submitted questions from the Sweet Baby Gang,

00:00:07.720 and then we're going to go to Reddit and look at some from there for them.

00:00:10.480 From Trailblazer says,

00:00:12.280 Hello, sweet daddy Matt.

00:00:13.620 When I was younger, my best friend lived next door and we hung out all the time.

00:00:17.680 As we got older, however, he started to act less Christian

00:00:20.060 and started to feel like a bad influence.

00:00:22.520 I grew up homeschooled in a Christian family while my friend was public schooled.

00:00:25.920 The older we got, the worse he seemed to behave.

00:00:27.780 When we were eight years old and an adult wasn't in the room,

00:00:30.720 he'd swear like a sailor and talk trash about my sister.

00:00:33.660 Whenever I told him not to talk like that, he'd throw a fit and storm home.

00:00:36.640 Something else he'd do was try and show me inappropriate YouTube videos

00:00:39.600 with nonstop cursing and inappropriate jokes.

00:00:42.160 After a while, I decided that I was fed up and I wasn't going to deal with him anymore.

00:00:45.480 I stopped hanging out with him eight years ago and we've never spoken since.

00:00:48.600 Some people thought that it wasn't Christian-like to ditch a friend like that,

00:00:51.520 but I felt that it was the right thing to do.

00:00:53.500 He seemed like a stumbling block in my relationship with God.

00:00:55.840 What do you think? Was I overreacting or did I make the right choice?

00:00:59.700 Am I the a**hole?

00:01:01.300 Well, you certainly made the right choice.

00:01:03.120 The people criticizing you, do they think that you owe lifelong friendship to this guy?

00:01:08.020 Like you're tethered to him forever because you happened to hang out when you were kids?

00:01:12.840 Look, the fact that most people, I don't know how old you currently are,

00:01:17.200 but most people don't remain friends with the people that they knew early in childhood their

00:01:23.840 whole lives. I mean, there are a few examples. There are some friends of mine who I've known

00:01:27.480 since elementary school, but it's uncommon. It generally, like the vast majority, let's put it 0.72

00:01:34.620 that way. 99.9% of everybody who you considered a friend or a friendly acquaintance anyway in your

00:01:42.380 elementary school, middle school years, even high school, you're not going to continue relationships

00:01:45.880 with them. Part of the reason is that when you're a kid, friendships are, first of all,

00:01:50.880 it's built, a lot of it is built around just sort of like, there's a certain element or kind of

00:01:55.180 default to it. You're friends with somebody because they live next door or you went to the same school

00:01:58.920 or you went to the same, you're in the same class. You kind of bond over. It doesn't take much. It

00:02:02.780 doesn't take much for kids to bond. I mean, I have, you know, my kids will, they'll go to the

00:02:07.100 playground and, and I have this conversation all the time with my, with one of my kids. They'll say,

00:02:11.600 oh, I made a friend at the playground. And then I'll say, oh, really? What was their name?

00:02:16.160 Uh, I don't know. So they make a friend without even knowing the person's name because for them,

00:02:21.300 friend just means like you both are going down the same, you both are playing on the same jungle gym or

00:02:26.440 something and you talk to each other, not your friends.

00:02:27.900 You like cherry soda? I like cherry soda. We'll be bench friends.

00:02:31.220 Which is great. You know, it's one of the wonderful things about childhood innocence is

00:02:35.520 that you can make friends that way. But what that means is that as you grow older, you're going to

00:02:40.500 find that just because you're friends with this person doesn't mean that you have any kind of

00:02:43.620 values in common. Uh, and so it's very easy to grow apart at that point. And as you get older,

00:02:48.800 you know, uh, you can't be friends with someone anymore just because you were both on the same

00:02:53.000 jungle gym. It's like, you need, you need a little bit more to maintain that friendship. Uh,

00:02:57.200 you need some to have some basic values in common, just something there. Certainly a shared sense

00:03:02.480 of respect, uh, is necessary to begin with. So no, you just, uh, this is just a natural, natural,

00:03:09.060 uh, progression of things and nothing to be concerned about. Okay. From Danielle says,

00:03:14.960 I'm not inviting one of my sisters to my wedding to make an extremely long story short. I got a

00:03:19.160 temporary restraining order against my ex-boyfriend because he was stalking me, i.e. showing up at

00:03:23.460 my work, following me to the beach, breaking into my house while drunk and coming into my bedroom at

00:03:28.540 2am. At the hearing to make the TRO permanent, I submitted evidence of the harassment, text messages,

00:03:33.960 including him admitting to coming into my house, eyewitness statements, et cetera. And he submitted

00:03:38.660 witness statements attesting to his character, as well as a character assassination of me from my

00:03:43.680 sister who doesn't know him at all. Claiming that I do this to all my boyfriends. I dated her friend

00:03:49.320 for a period, which I ended due to sexual abuse, as well as claiming that I'm a far right extremist

00:03:53.580 liar. The judge in liberal California decided that my sister's statement outweighed all my evidence

00:03:58.840 and denied me a permanent restraining order. I have not talked to my sister since then.

00:04:03.640 I have since met my fiance and I'm planning our wedding. Am I the a**hole for not inviting my sister

00:04:07.920 to the wedding? Well, based on all the information you've given me and assuming that everything you've told

00:04:12.660 me here is correct, which I have no reason to think that it isn't. No, you're not the a**hole 0.95

00:04:18.360 for not inviting your sister to the wedding. I'm sure you realize, though, that not inviting a family

00:04:23.520 member, especially an immediate family member, to your wedding is one of the most dramatic

00:04:30.240 statements you can make about a relationship. And the statement you're making is that the relationship

00:04:34.760 is over. So there's no coming back from this, as long as you realize that. There's no coming back

00:04:40.460 from it. Maybe like 30 years from now or something, you guys could try to repair these broken bonds.

00:04:46.280 But in the near term and short term and even, you know, the immediate long term, there's no repairing

00:04:53.200 it. This is like a severing of the relationship. But I would say, based on the information you've

00:04:59.280 given me, it's not really you who severed the relationship. She did that because, look, there are

00:05:05.600 plenty of cases where men are unfairly accused of, you know, of being, of harassing and all the rest

00:05:11.660 of it. They're being unfairly accused. They're being falsely accused. But in this case, if this

00:05:16.420 guy's breaking into your house in the middle of the night and coming into your bedroom, I mean,

00:05:20.800 this is like, this is criminal activity. This is, of course, you should feel unsafe around this

00:05:26.340 person. This is like, this to me goes beyond, this goes far beyond harassing. This is like actual

00:05:32.700 breaking and entering and physical intimidation inside your own house. Like, really, he should

00:05:37.700 be going to jail for that. But if that's not going to happen, then a restraining order is the least of

00:05:41.840 it. And the fact that she would side with the other guy, potentially putting your safety at risk

00:05:47.720 is pretty extreme. So that's already an extreme kind of severing of the relationship has already

00:05:53.260 happened. And all you're doing, I suppose, by not inviting her to the wedding is kind of

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00:07:02.680 Reddit. My son is 18 and will graduate from high school in a few months. Lately, he's been fighting

00:07:07.460 a lot with my wife and I. My wife isn't his biological mother, but she's been his mom since he

00:07:11.720 was three. A week ago, they got into a big fight, and my wife got frustrated and yelled at him that she

00:07:16.400 wasn't his mother. Since then, he's been completely cold to her, and when he does have to address her,

00:07:20.900 he does so by her first name. My wife confiscated the keys to his car last night, but I gave them

00:07:24.980 back this morning because he didn't curse at her. He just called her by her name. Besides, I don't want

00:07:29.980 to drive all the kids to school and then pick them up. My wife is upset and said I need to support her

00:07:34.180 and talk to him. I think it's pointless. He's 18. If he doesn't want to call her mom, we can't really

00:07:38.760 make him. My wife says that I'm being a lazy asshole that just doesn't want to have a conversation with 1.00

00:07:43.860 him. Maybe I am an asshole, but I did talk to him. He said he's not going to call her mom again

00:07:48.180 ever, but what am I supposed to do about it? Even if we find a way to force him to, he's going to

00:07:52.900 school at a state, so what do we do then? Just seems like a pointless battle that will only create

00:07:57.580 more animosity, but maybe that's just what a lazy asshole would say. Obviously not the asshole in

00:08:02.660 this case. We talked about just a second ago, there are things you can do in a relationship that

00:08:07.340 severed that relationship and there's no coming back from them. Sometimes it's not even something you do.

00:08:11.380 It can be something that you say. Most of the time, people in relationships and family dynamics,

00:08:19.020 you can get angry and say something you regret and apologize for it. There might be some hurt

00:08:23.100 feelings. There may be some emotional injury that happens, but it can be healed and repaired.

00:08:28.280 There are things that you can say, and even though they were just words, you can't come back from them

00:08:36.280 because you've expressed something that you actually think. And the other person is not

00:08:41.700 going to be able to just forget that you have revealed this thought. And this would be one of

00:08:47.580 them. Having your mother, who's maybe not your biological mother, but is your mom, say to you,

00:08:52.840 I'm not your mother. Yeah, that's one of those things. He's never going to forget that, ever.

00:08:57.880 You'll never forget that. He'll be 70 years old and he'll still think about that. And it forever

00:09:05.100 changes that relationship. There is no coming back from it. Consequences for your actions. You said

00:09:10.320 that you're not his mother. Now he's going to call you by your first name. It's going to forever alter

00:09:14.240 that relationship. That's consequences. Reap what you sow. FAFO, as the kids would say.

00:09:21.500 Finally, am I the a**hole for criticizing my roommate's grooming habits harshly? Hey, all.

00:09:28.020 I currently live in a rented apartment with my roommate. Recently, we've been running into some

00:09:31.260 issues because of his grooming. I occasionally notice a funk coming off of him, and a few times

00:09:35.520 it got bad enough to ask him to take a shower because it was distracting me and grossing me out.

00:09:39.720 He apologized and said he had a lessened sense of smell, which made him less likely to realize he

00:09:43.820 needed a shower. Sounded kind of BS to me, but he showered, so I didn't think anything of it.

00:09:48.420 Our apartment has two full bathrooms in the hallway, and I ordered a bidet for mine. The

00:09:52.000 other day, I was installing it, and he happened upon me doing it. He asked what it was for,

00:09:56.360 and I explained. He chuckled and said, you gay guys are something else. I laughed and said,

00:10:00.940 it's less invasive than toilet paper and more effective. He laughed and said, yeah, but I

00:10:04.020 don't use that either. What? Something clicked in my head, and I asked for clarification.

00:10:11.040 Apparently, he never wipes. Why am I reading this? He says he thinks it's gross to rub his

00:10:17.320 ass with a piece of paper that doesn't really do anything. He said, no straight guy does,

00:10:22.500 and it's not a big deal. I, uh, okay.

00:10:27.200 Okay. So the a-hole here is, uh, is the roommate for not practicing basic human hygiene. It's also

00:10:43.200 this other guy for telling us about this, and it's also my producer McKenna for sending me this,

00:10:49.380 am I the a-hole submission in the first place. So a lot, there's a lot of a-holes involved,

00:10:57.920 uh, in this particular story, and we're just gonna, um, stop there. I can't imagine. It goes on,

00:11:03.400 actually goes on for, like, another five paragraphs, this whole, if you want the whole saga

00:11:06.340 of this guy not wiping himself, you can go to Reddit and find it, but, uh, you're not gonna hear it

00:11:11.560 from me. All right. Talk to you tomorrow. Godspeed.

The Matt Walsh Show - June 23, 2023

＂My Sister Betrayed Me, But AITA？＂ Matt Walsh Responds

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