The Matt Walsh Show - February 10, 2024


These TikTok Challenges Are Getting Out Of Hand [Weekly Walsh Original]


Episode Stats


Length

9 minutes

Words per minute

198.33565

Word count

1,859

Sentence count

158

Harmful content

Misogyny

11

sentences flagged

Hate speech

7

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

A new trend on TikTok has people testing their relationships using a table condiment, and the Ketchup Challenge has people pouring ketchup on their kitchen counters and asking their significant other to clean it up. It's a game designed to test whether or not a partner is willing to be a good housekeeper.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 So there seems to have been, at least according to my producers who send me this stuff because
00:00:03.620 they like to see me suffer, a proliferation on TikTok in recent weeks of viral challenges that
00:00:08.660 women draft their unwitting husbands and boyfriends into. 1.00
00:00:12.040 Do you want to play a game?
00:00:13.200 The problem with these tests is that they're invented by women, for men, with a lot of 1.00
00:00:17.900 womanly assumptions about what they mean and what a man's failure or success signifies.
00:00:22.820 So let's go through these one by one. First, we'll go back a few weeks to something called
00:00:27.100 the bird test. And here's how the bird test works.
00:00:31.080 The bird test theory is basically a predictor for whether or not your relationship is going
00:00:34.460 to succeed. And it kind of goes like this. Let's say that you and your partner are sitting
00:00:37.920 at a coffee shop and you see a bird outside and you mention it to them. Your partner could
00:00:41.400 be like, oh, that's a really cool bird and engage with you and take interest in what you
00:00:44.760 just said. Or your partner can dismiss it all together and be like, okay, it's a bird.
00:00:50.020 What about it? The idea is if your partner takes interest in the mundane little small
00:00:55.120 things that you talk about, the relationship is just more likely to succeed because your
00:00:59.860 partner has genuine interest in whatever you say, regardless of whether that thing is a small
00:01:04.980 thing or not. On the flip side, if your partner kind of keeps ignoring your vids, that's kind of a
00:01:10.160 sign that the relationship is going to fail because whether small or big, your partner is not giving
00:01:16.360 attention to the things that you personally care about just for the sole reason that you care
00:01:20.820 about it. Now, this is the kind of thing that makes sense if you've never been in a relationship
00:01:25.080 that lasted more than three months. You know nothing. You might have the expectation that
00:01:29.800 your partner will be, quote, genuinely interested in whatever you say. But in the real world, which
00:01:35.180 is populated by actual human beings, nobody on earth will ever be genuinely interested in
00:01:40.600 everything you say. But enough about me. I hope this hasn't been boring for you. Now, I find my wife
00:01:45.360 very interesting and intelligent. But if she came into the room and said, I just saw a bird,
00:01:50.600 I would not be especially interested in that information. I just wouldn't be. Now, if you saw,
00:01:55.680 say, a bald eagle swoop down and catch a baby deer with its talons and fly away or something like
00:02:02.360 that, that would be the kind of headline that would interest me. So there needs to be something
00:02:05.760 spectacular about the bird to garner my interest. If you saw an ostrich ride by on a scooter,
00:02:10.980 that would be a bird related announcement that I would like to hear. Otherwise, what do you want
00:02:16.040 me to say about a regular bird? She said that you have to engage about the bird. What do you mean
00:02:22.760 engage? Say what? Oh, really? You saw a bird? Cool. Was it, did it, did it have wings? You know what
00:02:30.140 kind of bird that was? A lake lune. I don't know what the follow-up is. I don't know what a bird
00:02:34.220 conversation would even be. Therefore, this entire test fails. You have failed me for the last time.
00:02:40.600 Moving on to the next one. This one is called the ketchup challenge, and the New York Post
00:02:43.540 explains it this way. There's a new trend on TikTok that has people testing their relationship
00:02:47.060 using a table condiment. In what's being dubbed the ketchup challenge, TikTokers are pouring ketchup 1.00
00:02:51.660 onto their kitchen counters and asking their male partners to clean it up. That's it. That's the 0.65
00:02:56.380 whole challenge. When faced with the task, the significant other reacts in different ways and
00:02:59.920 has different cleaning techniques. And the point of the test, I guess, is to see if they'd make a good
00:03:05.220 janitor and also to see if they're obedient, which is really the point.
00:03:08.520 Sit. Good boy.
00:03:10.940 Here's just one chosen basically at random. Here it is.
00:03:15.940 What the f***? Can you please clean this for me?
00:03:19.160 What the f*** did you do?
00:03:23.920 Oh, I know what to do.
00:03:27.900 Wow.
00:03:29.380 Now, fortunately, my wife values the cleanliness of her kitchen counters far, far too much to ever 1.00
00:03:34.620 intentionally spread ketchup on them. That's why I'm a little surprised that so many women were 1.00
00:03:38.320 willing to do this challenge. Like, generally speaking, most women are fiercely protective of 0.99
00:03:42.920 their kitchen counters. They have strong feelings about the counters. They take great pride in the
00:03:47.180 counter. Women love counters. When they walk into a friend's home, the first thing they notice are 1.00
00:03:51.260 the counters. And driving home from the friend's house, they'll talk about the counters. They'll
00:03:54.560 say, did you see their kitchen counters?
00:03:56.100 We get it.
00:03:57.520 So, smearing ketchup on the counter seems like an act of sacrilege. It's also a very dumb game that
00:04:02.440 no man should ever play. If your wife intentionally makes a mess and looks right at you and tells you 1.00
00:04:07.140 to clean it, the only way to fail that test is to actually attempt to clean the mess.
00:04:11.660 The correct response in that situation is any variation of, uh, no? Are you kidding? Do I look
00:04:23.700 like your butler? And sadly, I did not see any man give that answer, which is the correct answer.
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00:05:25.560 That's expressvpn.com slash WalshYT. The next test is called the name a woman test, 0.53
00:05:31.100 and exactly as it sounds, the idea is that a woman asks her husband or her boyfriend
00:05:35.860 to name any woman at all. And if he does not say her own name, then he fails the test.
00:05:41.900 Name one woman.
00:05:43.160 What the f*** is this?
00:05:44.200 Just one.
00:05:46.780 Sydney Sweeney.
00:05:49.500 So he said Sydney Sweeney, so he failed, I guess. He named a woman, but not the one particular
00:05:54.360 woman that he was supposed to name, even though that was not mentioned in the prompt.
00:05:58.640 You left out a key piece of information, didn't you?
00:06:01.140 And that one's pretty stupid, so let's move past it and get to the dumbest one of all.
00:06:04.280 This latest trend, because as I said, there's a new one every week, is called the orange peel
00:06:08.260 test.
00:06:08.820 Orange, you glad I didn't say apple again?
00:06:11.440 The orange peel theory test involves women asking their men for an orange, and in order 0.99
00:06:16.640 to pass the test, the man must peel the orange before handing it back to her. So it's a high
00:06:21.500 stakes gambit. Let's see how it plays out.
00:06:24.480 Just pass me that orange over there.
00:06:25.980 Okay. How you want it? Freshly squeezed? You want it sliced in half, or you want a bunch
00:06:31.420 of mini oranges running around?
00:06:33.220 Kyle, I'll do it. Just give it to me. I'll peel it and everything.
00:06:36.940 Peel what?
00:06:38.100 Kyle.
00:06:38.800 Look at those hands.
00:06:40.840 I just put the hundred dollars on those nails. 1.00
00:06:43.440 Oh my God.
00:06:43.940 You ain't touching nothing with those freshly painted French chips.
00:06:46.940 Oh my God. Kyle, for real. Come on now.
00:06:49.480 This is riveting content, by the way. That video has like 70 billion views or something.
00:06:53.120 Like all these videos have so many views. Now, I don't mean to be the party pooper here. And of
00:06:58.120 course, it's not like me to be cynical usually. But that interaction, a thousand percent scripted,
00:07:03.800 obviously. The problem is that young women on TikTok don't realize that almost all of these
00:07:08.460 cute couple moments on TikTok or any other social media platform are scripted. So they go into their
00:07:14.380 own real world relationships with false expectations. There's just no way in reality you're going to get
00:07:19.320 a response like that when you tell your husband that you're hungry. You're hungry? Okay, I'll cook
00:07:23.280 something right away. What would you like? Steak? Salad? Fresh sea bass? Caviar? Polar bear? You want
00:07:26.880 me to, you want to eat a polar bear? I can run up to Greenland real quick and get you a polar bear.
00:07:31.000 What do you want to eat?
00:07:35.400 It's just not how human beings behave in the non-fictional universe. And by the way, if you were
00:07:38.800 married to a man like that in real life, it would get old so fast. It was old already after a minute.
00:07:44.360 It's like, just dude, calm down a little bit. It's like, it's a little bit, a little much. And
00:07:49.040 that's why the real answer to any of these tests is to not do them to begin with. Okay, these women 1.00
00:07:53.800 are trying to learn something about the men in their lives by testing them. But here's the first
00:07:58.220 thing they need to learn. We don't like to be tested. The thing that men hate the most in a
00:08:03.100 relationship, okay, the thing that drives us to crazy, the thing that will make us the most frustrated
00:08:07.420 is when you play games. When you say one thing, but you mean another, when you ask for one thing,
00:08:13.480 but you want something else. When you create a situation just to see how he reacts to it.
00:08:18.360 When you say you want something, but really you want something different.
00:08:21.520 All of those are games. And men are not stupid. They know when they are in a game. They resent it.
00:08:27.680 They feel disrespected as well they should. If you want to test anyone in a relationship,
00:08:32.960 test yourself. Go get an orange for your husband. Let's make that a challenge. Try to be more interested 0.73
00:08:38.820 in whatever he says. Clean up after him without complaining. And peel your own oranges.
00:08:45.960 That's the way. And it's also why all of these TikTok tests are today canceled.
00:08:52.480 Goodbye.
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