These TikTok Challenges Are Getting Out Of Hand [Weekly Walsh Original]
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
198.33565
Summary
A new trend on TikTok has people testing their relationships using a table condiment, and the Ketchup Challenge has people pouring ketchup on their kitchen counters and asking their significant other to clean it up. It's a game designed to test whether or not a partner is willing to be a good housekeeper.
Transcript
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So there seems to have been, at least according to my producers who send me this stuff because
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they like to see me suffer, a proliferation on TikTok in recent weeks of viral challenges that
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women draft their unwitting husbands and boyfriends into.
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The problem with these tests is that they're invented by women, for men, with a lot of
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womanly assumptions about what they mean and what a man's failure or success signifies.
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So let's go through these one by one. First, we'll go back a few weeks to something called
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the bird test. And here's how the bird test works.
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The bird test theory is basically a predictor for whether or not your relationship is going
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to succeed. And it kind of goes like this. Let's say that you and your partner are sitting
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at a coffee shop and you see a bird outside and you mention it to them. Your partner could
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be like, oh, that's a really cool bird and engage with you and take interest in what you
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just said. Or your partner can dismiss it all together and be like, okay, it's a bird.
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What about it? The idea is if your partner takes interest in the mundane little small
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things that you talk about, the relationship is just more likely to succeed because your
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partner has genuine interest in whatever you say, regardless of whether that thing is a small
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thing or not. On the flip side, if your partner kind of keeps ignoring your vids, that's kind of a
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sign that the relationship is going to fail because whether small or big, your partner is not giving
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attention to the things that you personally care about just for the sole reason that you care
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about it. Now, this is the kind of thing that makes sense if you've never been in a relationship
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that lasted more than three months. You know nothing. You might have the expectation that
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your partner will be, quote, genuinely interested in whatever you say. But in the real world, which
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is populated by actual human beings, nobody on earth will ever be genuinely interested in
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everything you say. But enough about me. I hope this hasn't been boring for you. Now, I find my wife
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very interesting and intelligent. But if she came into the room and said, I just saw a bird,
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I would not be especially interested in that information. I just wouldn't be. Now, if you saw,
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say, a bald eagle swoop down and catch a baby deer with its talons and fly away or something like
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that, that would be the kind of headline that would interest me. So there needs to be something
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spectacular about the bird to garner my interest. If you saw an ostrich ride by on a scooter,
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that would be a bird related announcement that I would like to hear. Otherwise, what do you want
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me to say about a regular bird? She said that you have to engage about the bird. What do you mean
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engage? Say what? Oh, really? You saw a bird? Cool. Was it, did it, did it have wings? You know what
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kind of bird that was? A lake lune. I don't know what the follow-up is. I don't know what a bird
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conversation would even be. Therefore, this entire test fails. You have failed me for the last time.
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Moving on to the next one. This one is called the ketchup challenge, and the New York Post
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explains it this way. There's a new trend on TikTok that has people testing their relationship
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using a table condiment. In what's being dubbed the ketchup challenge, TikTokers are pouring ketchup
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onto their kitchen counters and asking their male partners to clean it up. That's it. That's the
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whole challenge. When faced with the task, the significant other reacts in different ways and
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has different cleaning techniques. And the point of the test, I guess, is to see if they'd make a good
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janitor and also to see if they're obedient, which is really the point.
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Here's just one chosen basically at random. Here it is.
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What the f***? Can you please clean this for me?
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Now, fortunately, my wife values the cleanliness of her kitchen counters far, far too much to ever
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intentionally spread ketchup on them. That's why I'm a little surprised that so many women were
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willing to do this challenge. Like, generally speaking, most women are fiercely protective of
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their kitchen counters. They have strong feelings about the counters. They take great pride in the
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counter. Women love counters. When they walk into a friend's home, the first thing they notice are
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the counters. And driving home from the friend's house, they'll talk about the counters. They'll
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So, smearing ketchup on the counter seems like an act of sacrilege. It's also a very dumb game that
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no man should ever play. If your wife intentionally makes a mess and looks right at you and tells you
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to clean it, the only way to fail that test is to actually attempt to clean the mess.
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The correct response in that situation is any variation of, uh, no? Are you kidding? Do I look
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like your butler? And sadly, I did not see any man give that answer, which is the correct answer.
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That's expressvpn.com slash WalshYT. The next test is called the name a woman test,
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and exactly as it sounds, the idea is that a woman asks her husband or her boyfriend
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to name any woman at all. And if he does not say her own name, then he fails the test.
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So he said Sydney Sweeney, so he failed, I guess. He named a woman, but not the one particular
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woman that he was supposed to name, even though that was not mentioned in the prompt.
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You left out a key piece of information, didn't you?
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And that one's pretty stupid, so let's move past it and get to the dumbest one of all.
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This latest trend, because as I said, there's a new one every week, is called the orange peel
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The orange peel theory test involves women asking their men for an orange, and in order
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to pass the test, the man must peel the orange before handing it back to her. So it's a high
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Okay. How you want it? Freshly squeezed? You want it sliced in half, or you want a bunch
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Kyle, I'll do it. Just give it to me. I'll peel it and everything.
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You ain't touching nothing with those freshly painted French chips.
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This is riveting content, by the way. That video has like 70 billion views or something.
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Like all these videos have so many views. Now, I don't mean to be the party pooper here. And of
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course, it's not like me to be cynical usually. But that interaction, a thousand percent scripted,
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obviously. The problem is that young women on TikTok don't realize that almost all of these
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cute couple moments on TikTok or any other social media platform are scripted. So they go into their
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own real world relationships with false expectations. There's just no way in reality you're going to get
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a response like that when you tell your husband that you're hungry. You're hungry? Okay, I'll cook
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something right away. What would you like? Steak? Salad? Fresh sea bass? Caviar? Polar bear? You want
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me to, you want to eat a polar bear? I can run up to Greenland real quick and get you a polar bear.
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It's just not how human beings behave in the non-fictional universe. And by the way, if you were
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married to a man like that in real life, it would get old so fast. It was old already after a minute.
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It's like, just dude, calm down a little bit. It's like, it's a little bit, a little much. And
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that's why the real answer to any of these tests is to not do them to begin with. Okay, these women
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are trying to learn something about the men in their lives by testing them. But here's the first
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thing they need to learn. We don't like to be tested. The thing that men hate the most in a
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relationship, okay, the thing that drives us to crazy, the thing that will make us the most frustrated
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is when you play games. When you say one thing, but you mean another, when you ask for one thing,
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but you want something else. When you create a situation just to see how he reacts to it.
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When you say you want something, but really you want something different.
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All of those are games. And men are not stupid. They know when they are in a game. They resent it.
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They feel disrespected as well they should. If you want to test anyone in a relationship,
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test yourself. Go get an orange for your husband. Let's make that a challenge. Try to be more interested
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in whatever he says. Clean up after him without complaining. And peel your own oranges.
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That's the way. And it's also why all of these TikTok tests are today canceled.