The Megyn Kelly Show - Policing Comedy and the Kaepernick Documentary, with Jason Whitlock and Seth Dillon

00:00:00.600 Welcome to The Megyn Kelly Show, your home for open, honest, and provocative conversations.

00:00:11.980 Hey everyone, I'm Megyn Kelly. Happy Friday and welcome to The Megyn Kelly Show. There's so much

00:00:17.480 to get to. I'm fired up on this Friday because we have great, great guests. In just a bit,

00:00:22.500 we're going to be joined by Seth Dillon. If you don't know that name, you probably know his work

00:00:26.920 product. He's the CEO of the hilarious site, the Babylon Bee. Come on, how many times have you

00:00:33.860 shared with your friends Babylon Bee headlines, right? They're so brilliant. He's so clever and

00:00:40.920 he's got a lot to say about tech censorship. You would not believe the number of times that they've

00:00:45.520 tried to crack down on his website, which is satire, as misinformation. And the predictions that he's

00:00:52.240 gotten right, right? It's like life imitates art. He makes these outrageous, satirical predictions,

00:00:57.080 and then they come true. So we'll talk to him about that. Plus, we're going to show him and you an

00:01:02.480 absolutely insane video from Microsoft this week that takes wokeness to the next level. I mean,

00:01:09.060 here's a hint. It's no longer enough to say, now I guess I'd have to say, I'm Megyn Kelly. I'm a white,

00:01:15.340 cisgendered woman who's straight and I have blonde hair and blue eyes and freckles. They're going next

00:01:25.720 level. We'll show it to you. But first, Jason Whitlock is here. He's the host of Fearless with

00:01:30.400 Jason Whitlock on Blaze TV, all around great guy, incisive social commentator. And he and I both have

00:01:37.580 a lot to say about the Colin Kaepernick documentary on Netflix. Also on Aaron Rodgers, the latest star

00:01:43.540 athlete making headlines by being unvaccinated and apparently being a little untruthful about it.

00:01:49.480 We'll get into it. And then we're also going to discuss the latest on, have you heard what's

00:01:54.260 happening with Barstool Sports? The founder, Dave Portnoy, who's been on this show, is being accused

00:01:59.460 of having, quote, violent and humiliating sex with two young women. I've got a lot of thoughts on this.

00:02:05.800 We'll get to it in a minute. And Jason's still fired up over the election results. So as you can see,

00:02:10.240 a lot to discuss. Jason, great to see you again. How are you? I'm awesome. Thank you for having me

00:02:14.980 again. You are the perfect person today for so many of these stories. I'm dying to talk about

00:02:19.980 the Kaepernick documentary. I read your piece, so I know you've seen it, all six episodes of it,

00:02:25.600 as now have I. I watched the whole thing. I was pleased that you had watched the whole thing as

00:02:31.400 well, because as outrageous as that NFL slave trade comparison is and sort of the clip that's going

00:02:38.260 around. The whole thing is so remarkable. And as usual, you nail it. So for our audience at home

00:02:45.520 that hasn't seen any of it, I'm just going to reshow a little bit of that first clip. We have

00:02:49.460 a few clips for you, but let's just start with the one where he opens up the very first episode

00:02:53.320 comparing the NFL combine, where the NFL muckety mucks take a look at incoming possible players

00:03:00.400 to the slave trade. Here's the clip. Before they put you on the field, teams poke,

00:03:07.760 pride, and examine you, searching for any defect that might affect your performance.

00:03:13.880 no boundary respected, no dignity left intact.

00:03:18.320 Come on, boys, hurry up. Look at that shape there. Look at this. Mr. Farmer, I got your bid.

00:03:35.740 30, James, 30 to you. 100. So, next one coming up, best one we got.

00:03:41.200 Yeah, because Colin Kaepernick's $43 million deal in the NFL is just exactly like a slave being traded

00:04:07.920 against his will while not free. So, what did you make of the series, Jason? And I mean,

00:04:13.920 with that comparison in particular? Well, I think I was shocked because I saw that clip

00:04:20.460 go out over social media. And then when I watched the series, I was like, oh my God,

00:04:25.680 this is the first scene in the documentary. I thought it would wait before getting really stupid

00:04:31.920 and asinine. It did not wait. It came right out of the box and just screamed, hey, I'm Colin Kaepernick.

00:04:39.540 I'm an idiot. I don't know anything about African-American history. I don't know anything about the

00:04:46.060 degradation and the exploitation of slavery. I'm so stupid. I'm going to compare it to the NFL draft

00:04:55.440 process, which white and black players have been going through for decades. And Colin Kaepernick is

00:05:05.300 comparing this NFL process, this power dynamic and slavery. But according to Colin Kaepernick,

00:05:12.680 he's fighting to get back into the NFL. He wants back into slavery. I don't remember anybody that actually

00:05:22.660 went through slavery fighting to get back into slavery. And so it just, it opened and said,

00:05:32.000 look, I'm an idiot. Ava DuVarnay, I'm an idiot. And it just got, what shocked me, Megan,

00:05:40.140 it just got worse from there. It's so deeply offensive. I mean, can you imagine the outrage,

00:05:45.700 Jason, if a white filmmaker slash host had had the nerve to compare the NFL draft to slavery?

00:05:56.220 I don't think his, he's, he's mixed race. He had a black father and a white mother. He was given up

00:06:01.880 for adoption and raised by two white parents. I don't know that his black heritage gives him a

00:06:09.600 pass to make such a disgusting comparison and diminish the most shameful chapter of American

00:06:17.320 history by comparing it to something these guys participate in voluntarily, hopefully with excitement.

00:06:24.820 And the reason that they're being examined is so that they can hopefully get a multi-million dollar

00:06:30.240 contract to play the game of their dreams.

00:06:33.300 That they can use that money to enrich and empower their family, friends, whatever it is they believe

00:06:40.920 in. I don't think that was the slavery process. I do want to say this, and I say it in 99% seriousness,

00:06:49.580 a little bit of humor. There's no definitive proof that Colin Kaepernick's father is black.

00:06:58.600 There's none. And I looked at his Wikipedia one day and they said, yeah, his father's from Ghana or

00:07:06.700 Nigeria. They had this direct, and then the very next sentence was, no one knows who his father is.

00:07:12.760 We don't know the identity of his father. It's never been established. And there's a lot of people

00:07:19.260 that think like, when Colin looks more middle Eastern and when you go back and look at his kid photos

00:07:24.640 before, you know, he had all this work done on his hair so he could wear this blowout Afro,

00:07:30.240 you go out and look at his kid photos. You look at Colin and you don't know what he is. You don't

00:07:35.960 know. I mean, he certainly looks mixed race, but when he was a kid growing up with his hair cut

00:07:43.740 close, you didn't know what he was. He could have, he could, his dad could very easily be middle

00:07:49.520 Eastern. And so do I, Colin Kaepernick's upbringing, his white mom biologically and two white parents

00:07:58.340 and where he grew up, he did not have the typical black life and existence. And so for him, that's

00:08:07.480 why he plays this dress up game. That's why he spends so much time on his hair and cornrows

00:08:14.120 and afros. And that's why he's dressed up in a T'Challa Black Panther suit in this documentary

00:08:22.060 or miniseries or whatever it is. He has to, he's trying so desperately hard to be black from hairstyle

00:08:31.160 to the way he dresses to, you know, the stupid things he says. And, and what he doesn't realize

00:08:38.460 is when you are black, you don't have to bend over backwards trying to prove it to everybody.

00:08:45.960 Well, I read you say in your column, you wrote only a member of the KKK could fully enjoy this

00:08:52.360 portrayal of black manhood. And I did, it did jump out at me too, because he's sort of painting it as,

00:08:59.920 oh, I'm going to sort of get in touch with my black roots, notwithstanding the fact that I have

00:09:03.600 two white parents raising me, but the portrayal of black life. I mean, you tell me whether Ava and

00:09:11.460 Colin have nailed it. I don't think they've nailed it. I think that Ava, I think grew up in an adoptive

00:09:19.620 home. I think Ava may be mixed race as well. And I'm not trying to denigrate mixed race people,

00:09:26.860 but I think they have identity issues. And so Colin's perception of what represents blackness

00:09:34.140 as portrayed in the miniseries that he and Ava DuVarnay controlled was, okay, cornrows. If you

00:09:42.860 have cornrows, he put Allen Iverson on a pedestal and said, Allen Iverson embraced his blackness or

00:09:49.820 emblazed his culture. He braided his hair. So we've established that cornrows are essential to

00:09:56.840 being black. Then we've established basically throughout that highly seasoned fried food.

00:10:05.660 That's what being black is. Every time the two times Colin showed up in a black house,

00:10:11.100 there was fried chicken and pork chops and Crisco and collard greens everywhere. And Colin just,

00:10:18.280 if you watch it, I'm not kidding, watch it yourself. Oh, Colin just felt naturally at home

00:10:23.220 whenever there was fried chicken and extra season food popping off and his white mother,

00:10:29.860 she didn't cook that way, but all, you know, Colin, as soon as he goes to these black homes,

00:10:36.380 you know, the food is just incredible. And, and I'm said, look, I love soul food. I can cook. My

00:10:42.760 mother can cook. My father was a heck of a cook. My brother's a hell of a cook. And, but that highly

00:10:47.960 seasoned food leads to diabetes, heart disease, blood pressure issues, and a bunch of other stuff

00:10:54.120 that, you know, Colin said, well, that's black. And, and then the other just small little subtle

00:11:00.000 things. And, and it's like the nuclear fam is no part of their portrayal of black existence in America.

00:11:11.120 And, and maybe that's the most accurate thing they showed because 75% of black kids are being

00:11:18.300 born into single parent situations or unmarried situations. But, but the portrayal of the black

00:11:25.400 family, there were two instances early on. It was two black lesbian couples, uh, two different ones.

00:11:33.760 There was no black man of any, uh, importance ever portrayed in this. There was some uncle that asked

00:11:42.420 him some silly questions that, that his, his girlfriend or some woman he briefly dated house

00:11:49.340 or whatever. I, the portrayal of black people in this was embarrassing. And it's something that you

00:11:58.280 would expect a white racist to put together, not Colin Kaepernick and Ava DuVarnay, two of the

00:12:05.120 blackest people allegedly on the planet. The portrayal of white people wasn't much better.

00:12:10.860 Uh, virtually every single white person in the, in this, in the series is a racist, including

00:12:16.140 his parents. And I know you took issue with this too, but man, it was uncomfortable to watch him take

00:12:23.380 aim at his mother, his adoptive mother who is his mother. Uh, he has no relationship with his biological

00:12:30.980 mom and she's a white woman. They've, they've been, you know, seen publicly together. They've

00:12:36.840 given joint interviews in the past. I didn't know that there was a rift between them. And I don't know

00:12:41.360 sitting here now, whether there is, but man, he portrays her and his adoptive dad as racists.

00:12:48.860 And, um, you know, that his mother, I'm not so sure if I would go as far as racist. I think he

00:12:54.020 portrayed them as idiots. Okay. All right. Well, she, he takes issue with his mom calling him

00:12:59.460 a thug because of his hair. And then the mother definitely, he's suggesting she was a racist

00:13:04.280 because he, well, I'll show you the clip. This is, um, she allegedly was upset. He took a black girl

00:13:11.480 to the homecoming dance, which I just asked preposterous. Well, so standby, here's the clip.

00:13:16.120 Oh, you can play him back to back. Number four, number five. This is how he portrays his mom.

00:13:21.600 It's Colin's photos.

00:13:23.160 Ooh.

00:13:23.920 The homecoming dance.

00:13:25.340 Ooh.

00:13:35.320 What?

00:13:39.160 Well, I'll say one thing. Gold is her color.

00:13:43.460 Yes.

00:13:43.820 Yes, it is.

00:13:50.860 Is this what Eddie meant?

00:13:53.060 By blue black.

00:13:57.660 Well, I'm not going to worry myself.

00:14:01.740 You know how these kids are.

00:14:03.280 It's probably just, uh, uh, passing phase and Colin will be so caught up in sports.

00:14:12.840 Probably forget all about her.

00:14:14.260 So, yeah, before we get to the thug one, she's lamenting the, the girl's skin color that she's,

00:14:22.060 she's dark.

00:14:23.540 That's what the mother's lamenting.

00:14:25.180 And it plays off of an earlier phone call in involving the phrase blue black, as you heard.

00:14:29.760 I mean, it's just, wow.

00:14:31.840 Your thoughts on it.

00:14:33.580 Uh, I, I, it's not that I forgot that, but I still contend what his intent was,

00:14:42.480 was to portray them as idiots.

00:14:45.060 And I think it was unfair.

00:14:48.540 Uh, I think more than unfair.

00:14:51.300 I just, it's despicable the way he portrayed his parents.

00:14:54.960 Uh, he, he, at one point in the documentary, he, I was never anybody's first choice.

00:15:00.340 And he basically alleged that his parents wanted a white baby and had to settle for, uh, for Colin.

00:15:06.880 Look, his two biological parents abandoned him.

00:15:11.840 These two Christian people took him in, loved him, raised him, uh, bent over backwards in support

00:15:20.320 of his football aspirations, his academic aspirations, whatever his aspirations were.

00:15:27.400 And then to come out and put out some mini series that portrays them as this type of buffoon and this racially insensitive.

00:15:36.840 First of all, black parents will say to their kids, Hey, you're wearing your pants too low.

00:15:43.840 Are you trying to be a thug?

00:15:45.480 Hey, uh, I don't like your hairstyle.

00:15:47.640 Are you trying to be a thug?

00:15:49.600 What are you getting tattoos all over your body?

00:15:52.200 Are you trying to be a thug?

00:15:53.500 This goes on in black homes all the time.

00:15:57.800 My father, Hey, why you got that earring on, you know, that's not corporate.

00:16:03.440 That's not professional.

00:16:04.520 And my father loved black people.

00:16:08.940 My father, just to be quite frank with you.

00:16:11.240 And my father's an awesome human being, but he was a racist.

00:16:14.860 He did not like white people.

00:16:16.460 He experienced some things in his life, uh, that, you know, he couldn't let go of.

00:16:21.620 Uh, and so my father, uh, I can remember coming home from college and staying with my father one summer and, and my father, Hey, uh, these white girls calling this house that needs to stop.

00:16:34.640 And so parents say, and do some things that aren't always appropriate, but air them out this way, portray them as, as this kind of idiots.

00:16:50.380 And this kind of is absolutely ridiculous.

00:16:53.780 And for, for, for it not to be stated clearly in some sort of way in this mini stage, because Colin's narrating.

00:17:01.700 And so let's say that these events, which I think are fabricated, but let's say they're accurate.

00:17:09.180 Colin had every opportunity as the narrator to come and put some context around what we, what he just showed.

00:17:18.180 And it would be just like me saying, look, cause my father did not like white people.

00:17:23.080 I can put a lot of context and reasons why he did not like them, things that happened to him in his life that made him that way.

00:17:31.800 So you put the context around it so people can understand it.

00:17:34.640 There was no context other than these people are idiots and they're despicable.

00:17:38.720 And they allegedly had some problem with him taking some black girl to a dance and Megan, I'm 54.

00:17:44.180 I've known a lot of people in a lot of different situations.

00:17:48.780 I've never met a white person who has a problem with any black boy or biracial boy or mixed race boy.

00:18:00.040 Dating a black woman.

00:18:01.720 Well, he's suggesting that his parents did because they had this, this race problem.

00:18:06.880 There was, there was a clip where he said that the mother called him a thug.

00:18:10.980 This is only 10 seconds long.

00:18:12.200 Here it is.

00:18:12.740 Yeah.

00:18:13.020 Here I'll play it.

00:18:13.600 Number five.

00:18:14.180 You're cutting your hair, Colin.

00:18:16.940 I don't want to.

00:18:18.100 Too bad.

00:18:18.980 Why?

00:18:19.540 We told you it's a team rule.

00:18:21.500 But why?

00:18:22.620 Because you look like a thug.

00:18:25.860 That was it.

00:18:27.540 And the only thing I would say was different here is saying you look like a thug and saying you are a thug, two different things.

00:18:34.700 And I'm just sorry.

00:18:35.840 Black parents have that conversation with their kids all the time.

00:18:41.380 Well, and it depends, right?

00:18:42.300 White moms and all moms have conversations with their daughter.

00:18:45.420 You look like a slut.

00:18:46.360 You're not wearing that.

00:18:47.480 Like it's, it depends on the context of the circumstances.

00:18:50.860 And so if a white, a white boy with his dad and or mom, if he grows his hair too long, the word may not be thug, but there's some sort of, again, some sort of negative connotation.

00:19:06.880 Like, hey, cut your hair, you look like, you look like, you know, a druggie or you look like something.

00:19:14.460 And so parents and arguing about the hairstyles of their kids, this goes on.

00:19:20.400 And so what Colin isn't smart enough to understand is this like, this is what parents do.

00:19:30.260 And maybe if Colin needs to have a kid.

00:19:32.560 When I watch this, the whole thing is like, he is so aggrieved at everything.

00:19:37.920 He's mad that the umpire on the baseball field allegedly said no fraternization when he did a head nod to one of the one other black player on the field.

00:19:48.260 If so, that's bizarre.

00:19:49.860 I don't know why an ump would do that.

00:19:51.540 Maybe it was racism.

00:19:52.460 I don't know.

00:19:52.860 But for that to wind up in a movie about his life, like that's that's the key moment of racism.

00:19:58.080 He wants to point people back to his coach telling him he really needed to play baseball professionally, not football professionally, because he was better at baseball and he was only going to be second best if he went to football.

00:20:08.680 OK, that's that's a thing like that.

00:20:11.200 I don't.

00:20:11.740 All right.

00:20:12.600 He's still aggrieved by it.

00:20:14.240 He's got, you know, person after person who he thinks have done him wrong and made him, quote, second choice.

00:20:20.940 As you point out, he points out how America doesn't believe in black women as beautiful.

00:20:25.440 And I'm sitting there thinking like, OK, tell to Beyonce, tell to Holly Berry.

00:20:29.320 Maybe maybe years and years ago, he goes back to the 1930s to talk about the one baseball player who has said you got to play as a white man if you want to.

00:20:37.020 You got to sort of pass as a white man.

00:20:38.560 OK, it was 100 years ago.

00:20:40.140 Like it was terrible.

00:20:41.460 No one's arguing we weren't a racist country back then.

00:20:43.500 But these are his examples of what America is and why he says you've got to play.

00:20:50.720 You've got to play the game the right way.

00:20:52.540 What they really mean is you've got to play the game the white way.

00:20:55.320 And he portrays our country, never mind his upbringing, as though we're still in 1930.

00:21:01.400 Megan.

00:21:02.400 And here's why a lot of the stuff he showed, I just absolutely do not believe.

00:21:08.960 I think it's fabricated.

00:21:10.580 I think 90 percent of this stuff is completely fabricated.

00:21:15.020 I don't believe his white best friend told him, hey, man, I know I still hubcaps and jack cars.

00:21:23.260 But if I did it with you, I would get shot by the police.

00:21:27.340 Yes, right.

00:21:28.120 If I just do it myself, I'll get arrested.

00:21:31.700 Cut it out.

00:21:32.380 That's in there.

00:21:33.640 The other farcical.

00:21:35.080 I mean, just farcical.

00:21:36.380 He shows his this thing was told in such a stupid, illogical way.

00:21:45.760 His dad every day is driving down the highway, speeding and waving at the cop as he drives by.

00:21:54.220 And the cop clocks him going past the speed limit.

00:21:57.020 And then the one day Colin gets in the car and drives, the cop immediately pulls him over.

00:22:03.100 But they literally show like his dad waving at the cop as he drives by speeding.

00:22:06.700 And I'm like, Colin, Ava, are you suggesting that in this very white town that that this guy lived in, that they only pulled over white black people?

00:22:20.980 So they only wrote a ticket a month or two?

00:22:24.780 I mean, this is just comical the way he portrayed racism and how it impacted him.

00:22:32.020 It all felt fabricated because I just don't think he experienced much racism.

00:22:38.580 He has no idea what it actually looks like.

00:22:41.660 So he portrayed and neither does Ava, clearly.

00:22:44.600 So they portrayed it in the most farcical way possible.

00:22:47.860 I mean, it's a fascinating way to think about him as this figure that, you know, kneeled during the national anthem and it was the one who started that.

00:22:57.200 And what you're positing is it makes perfect sense because it's it's on the heels of a lifetime of fakery, of glomming, of somebody who who is sort of adjacent to people of color who have had an actual black experience.

00:23:11.360 But you don't actually buy it, given the way that he actually was raised.

00:23:15.760 And I mean, I'm sure he does have a black dad.

00:23:17.980 I have no idea what his he says.

00:23:19.660 His dad was black and his and his mom was white, his biological parents.

00:23:22.860 But he was obviously raised by white people.

00:23:24.280 And he clearly struggles with that.

00:23:26.300 If you watch this film, I don't know.

00:23:29.000 I will say the whole thing made me uncomfortable.

00:23:30.860 The way he portrayed black families, the way he portrayed white people as well and the way he portrays our country.

00:23:35.640 And the fact that he's being celebrated by Netflix, you know, for for this kind of storytelling and Ava to comparing the NFL draft to slavery is an embarrassment.

00:23:46.860 I don't recommend you watch it.

00:23:48.820 It's not worth your time.

00:23:50.160 I'm sorry I had to sit through the six episodes, though.

00:23:52.860 I will say the young actor who played the young Colin Colin Kaepernick was quite good and he was pretty charming.

00:23:58.300 Way more so than the actual Colin, I think.

00:24:00.080 What what I think I guarantee you, this wins some sort of award.

00:24:06.000 Definitely.

00:24:06.680 Hollywood is going to hop behind it and give it some sort of award and make it one of my favorite, like not one of my favorite movies, but I enjoy the movie Clueless.

00:24:17.520 And it's about, you know, blonde girl.

00:24:21.060 And that's this was the the half black version of Clueless.

00:24:26.760 That's what this movie.

00:24:27.960 This should have been a comedy.

00:24:29.860 I'm telling you, there were comedic elements.

00:24:32.560 It's true.

00:24:33.300 This was the like a Babylon Bee version of Colin Kaepernick's life.

00:24:37.800 Oh, that's the perfect set.

00:24:39.600 The perfect tease for our next hour when we have the CEO of Babylon Bee coming on.

00:24:43.980 All right.

00:24:44.140 Wait, we have much more to do with Jason coming up.

00:24:46.320 Aaron Rodgers, Dave Portnoy under fire, accused of a Me Too type situation, which he thoroughly denies.

00:24:52.240 We'll get into that next.

00:24:53.420 Stay tuned.

00:24:59.860 OK, so Dave Portnoy of Barstool Sports finds himself on the wrong end of Business Insider in what they deem an exclusive article written by Julia Black.

00:25:11.580 She's apparently been working on it for months.

00:25:13.840 He claims she gave him just a few hours to respond to these claims.

00:25:18.220 The headline is, quote, I was literally screaming in pain.

00:25:21.440 Young women say they met Barstool Sports founder Dave Portnoy for sex.

00:25:25.600 And it turned violent and humiliating.

00:25:27.260 She's got two stories in particular.

00:25:29.300 He's put out a response denying anything non-consensual.

00:25:33.300 You know, he admits hooking up with some young women, but says nobody told me that they weren't enjoying it or didn't want to be there.

00:25:40.980 Let me just give you the flavor.

00:25:43.140 Madison is the first story.

00:25:44.940 Summer 2020.

00:25:45.880 Again, he's denying anything non-consensual.

00:25:48.620 This is according to Business Insider.

00:25:50.320 This isn't Dave's side.

00:25:51.480 This is Madison's side.

00:25:52.800 She sent Dave Portnoy a DM.

00:25:55.600 Sick pizza reviews, she wrote.

00:25:57.160 Then he responded.

00:25:58.180 Thanks, fly bitch.

00:25:59.680 That's apparently a reference to something that was on her shirt in the picture that she sent him.

00:26:04.240 A 20 year old college student at the time, Port and Portnoy was a 43 year old multimillionaire.

00:26:08.960 The conversation soon moved to Snapchat and text where it quickly turned into the topic of sex.

00:26:14.160 He sent her graphic videos of other women he'd slept with, according to Madison, and he pressed her to tell him about her sexual fantasies.

00:26:21.380 She responded like a rape fantasy where I don't have any control over what's going on.

00:26:25.980 He responded.

00:26:26.700 You and I are going to get along so well, but I have to feel pretty comfortable for you to do that one, says Madison.

00:26:32.980 Of course, says Portnoy.

00:26:34.420 And he bought her a first class plane ticket to visit him at his Nantucket home.

00:26:38.860 The trip was, quote, traumatic.

00:26:40.780 Madison told Insider.

00:26:42.620 She arrived at his four bedroom home around 3 p.m.

00:26:44.900 Tired enough for her travel.

00:26:45.980 She didn't mind when he said, let's order pizza in instead of going out.

00:26:48.660 Still, she was surprised to find him nothing like his charismatic online persona.

00:26:53.200 He was very rude and so on.

00:26:55.240 After dinner, they started kissing.

00:26:57.060 She said she first became uncomfortable when Portnoy pulled out his phone and started filming her without asking permission as she performed oral sex on him.

00:27:05.560 I never said anything.

00:27:06.800 I was scared.

00:27:07.840 He was just so mean, she said.

00:27:10.280 And then she goes on and I'll get to the remainder.

00:27:13.080 But I have to say, Jason, when I read this as a mother of a daughter, as a woman who's grown up in a man in a world that was probably far more patriarchal when I was his girl's age than it is today.

00:27:24.780 All I could think was, oh, you felt uncomfortable when he pulled out his phone and started filming you as you were fellating him after not knowing him at all, accepting his first class class plane ticket and getting down on your knees with a man who you only knew the public persona of.

00:27:41.440 And then you were surprised it wasn't working out well that he wasn't your prince charming.

00:27:45.900 Take some responsibility.

00:27:46.960 Take it.

00:27:47.960 It's not that he has no responsibility to treat her well.

00:27:50.260 I don't want people to misunderstand me, but she's 100 percent responsible for putting herself in that position to begin with.

00:27:56.900 This is the reason the vast majority of women would never do such a crazy thing as this young woman did.

00:28:03.620 And now all eyes are trained on him because he was apparently, according to her, rough.

00:28:08.440 So rough.

00:28:08.940 I felt like I was being raped.

00:28:10.700 He videotaped me.

00:28:11.600 He spat in my mouth.

00:28:12.760 He choked me so hard I couldn't breathe.

00:28:14.880 And he's denying this.

00:28:16.100 And I was screaming in pain.

00:28:18.360 I screamed too much, too much.

00:28:20.000 It hurts.

00:28:20.380 He denies that, too.

00:28:22.180 And then she she stayed there two days.

00:28:25.460 They didn't sleep together again.

00:28:26.520 She slept on his couch.

00:28:27.780 I'm sorry.

00:28:28.740 Any young woman like there's a lesson in here for young women nationwide.

00:28:32.440 Don't do this.

00:28:33.380 Don't slide into somebody's DMS.

00:28:35.240 Don't accept their plane ticket to go visit a man you don't know.

00:28:38.320 Don't fillet him after dinner when you don't know him.

00:28:40.840 And don't be surprised when he takes out his phone and starts filming you and then don't play the victim.

00:28:44.920 Because you put yourself in that situation.

00:28:47.160 He doesn't come off looking well at all.

00:28:49.240 He's got his own conscience to answer to.

00:28:51.540 But this woman made terrible choices.

00:28:54.960 And I don't think we get ahead in the Me Too movement or as women in general by not accepting that we, too, have some responsibility for our own actions and placing ourselves in situations that can lead to bad results.

00:29:06.780 OK, that's my rant.

00:29:07.740 I'm going to turn it over to you, my friend.

00:29:10.260 And I can't disagree with anything you said.

00:29:13.500 And I think as a woman, I think that's a natural first reaction.

00:29:20.020 As a man, I have a different first reaction.

00:29:23.720 Yeah, this is why I love talking to you.

00:29:24.940 And it's it's it's and again, I think your reaction is perfectly appropriate.

00:29:29.740 And that's why, you know, men and women should work together in conjunction with the raising of their kids.

00:29:36.920 And so I guess and, you know, I'm 10 years older than Dave.

00:29:41.500 And so if I were Dave's older brother or father, you know, I look at I hear that story and I'm repulsed by his behavior and I'm repulsed for a couple of reasons.

00:29:53.600 One, he's got to know his position.

00:29:56.720 This is Dave Portnoy at 43, not 33.

00:30:00.620 This guy's a multimillionaire representing Penn National Barstool, hundreds of employees.

00:30:08.600 He can't put himself in this position.

00:30:11.320 You can't be in the DMs of 20 year olds and sending them first class plane tickets to come and give you a blowjob.

00:30:19.460 Just can't do it.

00:30:20.380 Those days are over when you have the kind of responsibility that he has.

00:30:25.440 And so the lack of self-awareness and then just the the the lack of regard for this is a 20 year old child.

00:30:35.700 Oh, come on.

00:30:36.760 She's not a child.

00:30:37.820 When you're 43.

00:30:38.680 No, no.

00:30:39.000 She's not a child.

00:30:39.560 I would say when you're 43 and I've been 43.

00:30:43.060 And again, I have a just being completely honest.

00:30:48.720 I like younger women.

00:30:50.380 But I don't like children.

00:30:52.960 And I'm just at 43 20s a child.

00:30:57.280 Now, if she's 25 out of college in the workforce, you know, that's an adult.

00:31:04.400 And in my view and is far more fair game than a 20 year old child when you're 43.

00:31:13.360 And I don't have any problem with 40 year old men or 50 year old men that like to date 30 year old women or 28 year old women or whatever.

00:31:22.220 But they've been around.

00:31:24.520 They got some hair on their whatever.

00:31:28.020 I don't say hair on their chest or whatever.

00:31:30.320 So I'm just telling you from from a man's perspective.

00:31:33.060 That's the way I see it.

00:31:34.940 He's the power dynamic.

00:31:36.680 He's a multimillionaire.

00:31:38.240 This is a 20 year old.

00:31:39.460 So there's so much imbalance here and him putting himself in harm's way.

00:31:45.760 I don't disagree with what you're saying.

00:31:47.660 He also bears responsibility.

00:31:49.920 And now he's feeling panicked.

00:31:51.340 It's not just her, by the way.

00:31:52.480 It's a 19 year old named Allison who, according to the piece, sent Portnoy a message saying she was on the island.

00:31:58.740 I think Nantucket would love to see him.

00:32:01.060 He invited her over.

00:32:01.960 She asked whether she could come by with a couple of friends.

00:32:04.440 He said, while we F seems weird, she responded.

00:32:07.940 Nah, they don't mind.

00:32:09.020 Very playful.

00:32:09.720 She's obviously telegraphing.

00:32:10.960 She's in for sex.

00:32:12.840 She got there.

00:32:13.960 He went inside.

00:32:14.800 She said, I'll go in with you.

00:32:16.200 He said, I didn't know it'd be that easy.

00:32:19.040 He leaned in, started kissing me.

00:32:20.640 I didn't know what to do.

00:32:21.680 We went upstairs.

00:32:22.600 He was really aggressive.

00:32:23.600 I didn't know what to do.

00:32:24.560 We had sex.

00:32:25.660 That was it.

00:32:26.400 He kicked me out.

00:32:27.160 Her memories were fuzzy because of her emotional distress.

00:32:30.140 She claimed that he choked her.

00:32:31.960 Again, he kept spitting in my mouth, which was really gross.

00:32:34.800 I was kind of scared.

00:32:35.620 I didn't want to disappoint him.

00:32:37.600 And then she claims that she, oh, her friends say she was uncharacteristically quiet afterward.

00:32:45.080 And all I could think was, okay, because you put yourself in a situation where you devalued

00:32:49.840 yourself and you allowed somebody else to debase you, you, the reason, I mean, I was like,

00:32:54.800 I'm not a perfect angel, Jason, but the reason that I don't have these experiences in my past

00:32:59.660 is because I've never slept with somebody who I didn't deeply care for and no deeply cared

00:33:03.440 for me.

00:33:04.060 That's just not been my MO.

00:33:05.680 And is that just happenstance and luck in my situation?

00:33:08.200 No, it's not.

00:33:08.660 I lost my dad at a very young age.

00:33:10.720 I haven't had a perfect life, but I always understood that that is a next level behavior.

00:33:17.000 And you have to, especially as a young woman, be very careful about who you allow to have

00:33:22.780 that kind of intimate access to you.

00:33:25.540 Not everyone will treat you right.

00:33:27.740 Not everyone will be good to you.

00:33:30.420 And it can go south fast.

00:33:31.700 So that's both parties bear responsibility in these situations.

00:33:34.520 It's not if he had just grabbed them and assaulted them, this would be all on him.

00:33:38.300 But these women were willing participants.

00:33:40.220 And then when they found out he was a cad to be charitable, they had more than just him

00:33:47.400 to blame.

00:33:48.320 She claims she became suicidal.

00:33:50.160 He's released text messages showing that she seemed to be pursuing another encounter

00:33:56.020 with him after the fact.

00:33:57.760 So he's challenging that.

00:33:59.160 And I should stay for the record.

00:34:00.320 Here is part of Dave Portnoy's defense, the full version of what you can catch online.

00:34:05.160 Watch.

00:34:06.560 Into the two allegations that are jarring.

00:34:10.120 And if I read them not knowing me, I'd be like, this guy belongs behind bars, basically.

00:34:15.140 At no point she came, she flew.

00:34:18.300 We did have pizza, hung out.

00:34:20.160 Hooked up at no point during it.

00:34:22.500 At no point was it not 100% consensual.

00:34:25.020 At no point did she ask me to stop.

00:34:27.120 At no point did either of us think something unseemly happened.

00:34:30.420 There was no weirdness.

00:34:31.640 After, it was totally fine.

00:34:33.480 Normal interaction.

00:34:34.820 Sexual, 100% consensual.

00:34:37.880 Incident number two, I had no idea about.

00:34:39.940 Which is basically a girl came over in Nantucket.

00:34:42.840 She DM'd me.

00:34:44.400 She asked to come over.

00:34:45.760 She came over.

00:34:46.880 We hung out by the pool.

00:34:47.960 Started hooking up.

00:34:48.960 Had sex.

00:34:50.100 And then it says she went home.

00:34:52.380 Got super depressed.

00:34:53.840 She took a selfie with me.

00:34:54.920 Got super depressed.

00:34:55.980 When the selfie circulated.

00:34:57.500 And three days later was in the hospital with depression.

00:34:59.960 The first one, I'll never be able to prove my side of the story ever.

00:35:04.020 That he said, she said.

00:35:07.120 I swear to God in my life, I'm telling the truth.

00:35:11.520 The second one, at least I have something to back it up.

00:35:14.160 It's an interesting point you're making, which is, even if you believe his denial, you don't let him off the hook.

00:35:21.500 I want to add that I tend to believe what Portnoy is saying.

00:35:28.060 However, and again, the point of view of my show, my worldview, is like, we're at a time in America where the whole country is in chaos, moral decay.

00:35:41.220 And it's because men have fallen and failed.

00:35:45.400 And that's why I'm critical here of Dave Portnoy.

00:35:49.420 I'm just sorry.

00:35:50.560 In his position, a 19 and a 20 year old, he's in his 40s.

00:35:55.920 He represents Penn National.

00:35:57.920 He represents Barstool.

00:35:59.560 He's got female employees.

00:36:01.200 He's got putting himself in this position, behaving this, in my view, inappropriately with 19 and 20 year old children.

00:36:11.320 I'm just it's unacceptable.

00:36:13.240 Men have to do better.

00:36:14.800 If we're going to get this country back on track, men are going to have to step up and answer to a higher standard of behavior than what he's exhibiting here from a leadership position.

00:36:28.640 This is unacceptable.

00:36:30.020 This is why our country's in chaos.

00:36:32.660 It all ties together.

00:36:34.580 This is why, you know, Marxism and just our whole country is just out of line because men can only think about momentary pleasure and whatever satiates them instantly.

00:36:49.460 I've been a public figure for a long time.

00:36:52.340 I don't have hundreds of millions of dollars like Dave Portnoy, but I've been wealthy for a long time and I've been in position.

00:37:01.500 Two weeks ago, I'm going up my elevator in my building and I hit the penthouse level, a 21 and a 22 year old girl.

00:37:12.060 Hey, you want to go up and see your apartment?

00:37:13.980 They're not going to say I behaved anything like what Dave Portnoy just did because I understand my position.

00:37:24.040 They were attractive.

00:37:25.260 I like attractive young women, but I'm just not an idiot.

00:37:29.800 And there's a higher standard that I have to hold myself to than just can I get a blow job and film somebody while doing it.

00:37:40.800 That's just that's college frat boy behavior, not the leader of a company.

00:37:47.520 Well, I will say this.

00:37:48.820 I think what the theme that's emerging here is you're asking for men to do better.

00:37:53.960 I'm asking for women to do better.

00:37:55.940 And that's because you and I are both take responsibility kind of people.

00:37:59.220 You know, I I don't excuse his behavior, but I also don't excuse theirs.

00:38:03.460 And I think they're not children.

00:38:05.060 They're they're young adults and they need to make better choices.

00:38:08.220 Young women have been sexualized, over sexualized and taught by modern day media that their sexuality should be exploited to the max and that that's somehow empowering.

00:38:18.360 And it isn't.

00:38:19.660 You know, it's empowering is to have sex on the terms that you want with somebody you love and who you know cares about you.

00:38:25.100 Then go to town.

00:38:26.260 Get down.

00:38:26.940 Go for it.

00:38:27.500 You and I have talked about this before.

00:38:29.460 But you put yourself in bed with a stranger.

00:38:32.240 Anything can happen.

00:38:33.100 And if you don't remember that, things are not going to go well for you in your life inside or outside of the bedroom because it speaks to some recklessness, recklessness on both sides.

00:38:43.440 OK, I got to ask you about Aaron Rodgers.

00:38:45.700 So he is in big trouble because he suggested that he was vaccinated and now he has covid, which doesn't mean he's not vaccinated.

00:38:54.100 But ESPN is reporting he is not vaccinated.

00:38:57.320 And he lied when he said the following.

00:39:00.620 Listen to this.

00:39:01.240 Sound by 10.

00:39:03.000 Yeah, I've been immunized.

00:39:07.160 You know, there's a lot of a lot of conversation around it, around the league and a lot of guys who have made statements and I made statements.

00:39:16.140 Owners who made statements.

00:39:18.900 You know, there's guys on the team that haven't been vaccinated.

00:39:22.240 I think it's a personal decision.

00:39:23.960 I'm not going to judge those guys.

00:39:25.280 He's really not judging them because he was apparently one of them that didn't actually get.

00:39:31.280 He said he had some homeopathic remedy.

00:39:33.700 He was asking the NFL to consider a vaccine and they didn't.

00:39:38.220 And now he's being ripped.

00:39:39.940 Like Stephen A. Smith came out and said, like, he wasn't man enough to just admit, like some of the other guys, I didn't get it and I'm not going to get it.

00:39:46.280 He wanted he didn't want the media pounding.

00:39:48.780 I don't know.

00:39:49.440 What's what's your take?

00:39:50.080 Look, I think it's ridiculous that we're requiring these young people in the prime of health, people that micromanage everything that goes into their bodies so they can perform at the highest level.

00:40:04.860 I think it's ridiculous that we're forcing these vaccines on them in the NFL and the NBA.

00:40:10.480 So because I lean that way, I'm I'm I'm I'm given Aaron Rodgers a pass.

00:40:18.480 I wish that he had been mad enough to handle it the way that Kyrie Irving has handled it in the NBA.

00:40:24.460 And because we need Aaron Rodgers, like I think Lamar Jackson, another great NFL quarterback.

00:40:31.220 He hasn't taken the vaccine and he's been up front about it.

00:40:35.100 Kirk Cousins, he's been up front about it.

00:40:37.580 But if Aaron Rodgers and I believe Tom Brady should have been and I know Tom Brady pretends or says or maybe he has actually taken the vaccine.

00:40:47.960 It's hard for me to believe, but I don't think Aaron Rodgers is alone in the athletic world in in ducking the vaccine.

00:40:56.400 And so I'm I'm I'm just not going to be hypercritical of him because I think all these young people in in professional sports, COVID is no risk to them.

00:41:06.280 They don't want to take the vaccine and they shouldn't be forced to.

00:41:09.560 I agree with you.

00:41:10.240 I feel uncomfortable with the questions.

00:41:12.900 It's like, do you have an STD?

00:41:14.900 Which STD do you have?

00:41:16.180 What is it?

00:41:16.640 Is it is it herpes?

00:41:17.900 What do you have herpes, Aaron Rodgers?

00:41:19.280 Do you do you do you do you do you?

00:41:20.680 And then when when somebody not saying Aaron Rodgers has herpes, but like when somebody responds, no, I don't have an STD.

00:41:26.900 And then it turns out that they do.

00:41:28.520 We're like, liar, liar, because that's how society is behaving toward people who haven't gotten the vaccine there that they're there to be demonized, ostracized.

00:41:37.520 No wonder the guy didn't want to say he hadn't done it.

00:41:41.360 You get pilloried now as though you've done something really evil.

00:41:45.580 And then we we paint ourselves as the moral arbiters when we catch you, you know, saying, ah, liar.

00:41:53.300 Well, we're the ones who put you in that position to begin with.

00:41:55.600 It shouldn't be any of our business should not be any of our any of our business, Jason.

00:41:59.200 Well, football teams hate distractions.

00:42:04.160 And if Aaron Rodgers is on the record, as big a profile as he has in the NFL, if he's unvaccinated, his whole season would be dominated by questions about his vaccination status.

00:42:18.120 When it's Kirk Cousins, who's not on Aaron Rodgers level, it's a it's a story for a day or two and then it goes away.

00:42:26.140 But when it's Aaron Rodgers, it's an everyday story.

00:42:29.520 Again, people say, well, no one's harassing Lamar Jackson.

00:42:33.060 And just quite frankly, Megan, that's because Lamar Jackson's black and most of the media is afraid of being critical of any black athlete because they'll get smeared as racist.

00:42:43.280 Aaron Rodgers is a white guy.

00:42:45.120 Aaron Rodgers already has a bit of a reputation with the media.

00:42:48.240 And he knows exactly how this would have played out had he started the season out.

00:42:53.940 Yeah, I'm anti-vax.

00:42:55.580 I'm not taking it, blah, blah, blah.

00:42:57.320 Next thing you know, he's a major story and everywhere he goes, there's protesters, perhaps there's harassment.

00:43:02.840 And so he tried to avoid it.

00:43:06.060 Again, it sounds like I'm making a bunch of excuses for him.

00:43:08.840 But all of these young athletes from Kyrie Irving to any of them that don't want to take the vax, more power to him.

00:43:15.340 I've said it a million times, the vaccine is for fat 50-year-old people like me.

00:43:20.580 It's not for in-their prime athletes.

00:43:24.360 They have no business taking this.

00:43:27.160 If you're young, you're not done having kids, no way you should take this vaccine.

00:43:31.500 All right.

00:43:31.780 Now, first of all, you may be in your 50s, but you're not fat.

00:43:35.620 And I'm 50 and I'm not fat.

00:43:37.860 And I took the vaccine.

00:43:38.760 I'm glad to have taken it.

00:43:39.920 But I don't believe in the mandates either.

00:43:41.820 And I do believe the vaccine can definitely reduce your hospitalization risk and your death risk, especially if you're older and, you know, certainly older than 50, which I will be as of November 18th.

00:43:53.040 But in any event, you're looking good.

00:43:54.660 You're actually looking really good, Jason.

00:43:56.020 And it's always so good to talk to you.

00:43:58.820 Let me tell you something, Megan.

00:44:00.540 If I looked 18 like you do, I might take the vax too.

00:44:04.540 You're aging backwards.

00:44:05.920 You're the Benjamin Button of punk.

00:44:08.580 You're so fun.

00:44:11.100 All right.

00:44:11.360 We'll see you over on your show on The Blaze.

00:44:12.960 Such a pleasure.

00:44:14.040 Say hi to Uncle Jimmy.

00:44:15.540 Thank you.

00:44:16.420 All right.

00:44:16.720 Coming up, Babylon Bee CEO Seth Dillon will be with us.

00:44:20.600 We're looking forward to that.

00:44:21.320 He got a nice tease from Jason.

00:44:23.140 This guy's been prescient.

00:44:24.580 His satirical predictions are coming true one by one.

00:44:29.100 How does he do it?

00:44:30.020 And remember, everyone, you can find The Megyn Kelly Show live on Sirius XM Triumph Channel 111 every weekday at noon east and the full video show and clips when you subscribe to our YouTube channel.

00:44:40.920 Go to YouTube dot com slash Megyn Kelly.

00:44:43.980 It was one week ago today that we caught a bird invade our studio and Abby, my huntress assistant, had to save the day and it's all caught on cam.

00:44:54.080 See what you're missing if you're not watching the YouTube show?

00:44:56.960 Or if you prefer, by the way, you can just subscribe to the audio podcast, download an Apple, Spotify, Pandora, Stitcher, and that's a good way of sharing it with folks who missed it.

00:45:05.080 There you'll find our full archives with more than 190 shows, including an interview with Dave Portnoy and some great ones with Jason prior to today as well.

00:45:13.300 Go ahead and check them out.

00:45:19.800 So one of the things we wanted to bring to you today was the reaction to Tuesday's big electoral victories by Republicans, including Winsome Sears as lieutenant governor of Virginia.

00:45:29.540 You would think that people would be celebrating her first black official to hold that office in the state of Virginia.

00:45:36.120 Very different reaction on places like MSNBC and with Joy Reid and her guest.

00:45:41.480 Take a listen to them.

00:45:42.760 So you had a choice of two brown slash black people and you picked one of them.

00:45:48.400 Do you get credit?

00:45:49.740 They want white supremacy by ventriloquist effect.

00:45:52.320 There is a black mouth moving, but a white idea through the running on the runway of the tongue of a figure who justifies and legitimates the white supremacist practices.

00:46:05.240 So to have a black face speaking in behalf of a white supremacist legacy is nothing new.

00:46:11.840 If you tell black people, look, I support a Negro.

00:46:15.000 Look, there is a person of color that I am in favor of.

00:46:18.160 And that person of color happens to undermine and undercut and subvert the very principles about which we are concerned.

00:46:25.220 You do yourself no service by pointing to them as an example of your racial progressivism.

00:46:31.900 Our executive producer, Steve Krakauer is a media critic, Steve.

00:46:35.420 So it's a ventriloquist situation if a black conservative wins and the white people are presumably the puppeteers.

00:46:43.360 Yeah, this is, you know, it's funny.

00:46:45.820 This is actually something Michael Eric Dyson has said previously about another black politician, Daniel Cameron, who's been on the show on another MSNBC interview, I believe also with Joy Reid.

00:46:56.740 It's it's it's kind of crazy to me.

00:46:58.320 I, you know, Megan, I emailed a friend of mine who I will not reveal who works at NBC and MSNBC.

00:47:03.040 I said, are you cool with this?

00:47:04.200 Is this is this good?

00:47:05.440 And they sort of said, oh, you know, it's a guest.

00:47:07.440 It's not the host.

00:47:08.600 OK, sure.

00:47:09.560 I'm sure she totally disagreed with him, as was reflect.

00:47:12.840 Oh, wait, Steve.

00:47:15.020 Interesting seeing you.

00:47:16.200 Thanks for coming on.

00:47:17.080 Babylon Bee CEO Seth Dillon is next.

00:47:25.320 Joining me today, Seth Dillon, the owner and CEO of the Babylon Bee.

00:47:31.060 What a gift the Babylon Bee is.

00:47:33.200 A hilarious site that drives the media insane, even more so than they normally are,

00:47:38.460 and gets them to call funny stories that are obvious parody misinformation.

00:47:43.040 Seth, welcome.

00:47:44.360 Thanks for having me on, Megan.

00:47:45.440 It must be so fun for you when someone like The New York Times actually tries to engage in a fact check of you guys or tries to call you out as misinformation,

00:47:55.820 only to be checked by you on its misinformation because you're a satirical site not offering facts up for actual consumption is journalism.

00:48:04.560 Well, I'm glad you make that point because that's the point I always like to make is that it's just this like rich irony that they're accusing us of misinformation while using misinformation to smear us in the same breath.

00:48:15.860 So, yeah, it is it is a little silly and ridiculous.

00:48:18.820 And I'm glad they retracted that statement about us because it was pretty slanderous and false and silly.

00:48:24.960 I mean, look, we're we're trying to make people laugh.

00:48:26.820 We're trying to make them think, too, but we're trying to make them laugh.

00:48:28.820 And satire is a legitimate enterprise.

00:48:30.320 And just because we're making jokes that you don't like doesn't mean that we're somehow maliciously trying to mislead people.

00:48:36.020 It's it's the most bizarre thing.

00:48:38.380 But but it's it's really true, though.

00:48:40.720 There's a grain of truth in every joke.

00:48:42.380 A lot of these jokes are going to be believable.

00:48:44.320 And that's not an indictment of satire.

00:48:46.040 In fact, it's an indictment of the people that you're making fun of.

00:48:48.260 It's an indictment of people that you're mocking because it's actually believable, the joke that you're making.

00:48:52.040 That says something about them.

00:48:53.660 Yes. You've been misinterpreted as a truthful reporting site by everyone from The New York Times to Donald Trump while in the Oval Office, though.

00:49:02.060 I understand you were assured he knew it was satire, though the tweets suggest otherwise.

00:49:06.680 But here are just a couple of headlines.

00:49:07.980 I pulled some of my favorite.

00:49:08.920 We have a great friend who my husband and I text with all the time.

00:49:12.360 Headlines from you guys is they're just so clever.

00:49:14.660 And we always read the articles and laugh.

00:49:16.020 And I just pulled like a few of my favorite because I went back on the text chain just to see.

00:49:19.740 All right.

00:49:20.040 For folks who have had their heads under a rock and don't know about the Babylon Bee.

00:49:23.660 These are some of your reports.

00:49:25.760 Scandal as Newsom campaign produced old yearbook photo showing Larry Elder in blackface.

00:49:30.720 So that's amazing.

00:49:34.360 Then Biden hires interpreter to translate his speeches into English.

00:49:38.980 Experts warn of new Cuomo variant that is dangerous to young women, fatal to elderly.

00:49:45.660 Kamala Harris visits Tomb of the Unknown Soldier to tell them to enjoy the long weekend.

00:49:52.180 Here's a couple of my favorites.

00:49:54.080 AOC claims her abuela died in attack on Capitol.

00:49:58.360 That actually could be true.

00:49:59.980 AOC added to Iwo Jima Memorial for surviving Capitol riot.

00:50:05.040 Then this was low hanging fruit, but I got to give it to you anyway.

00:50:07.720 Toobin reinstated in touching interview.

00:50:10.240 I got off easy.

00:50:12.600 Then there's Biden continues rollback of Trump policies like peace in the Middle East.

00:50:19.800 So ridiculous.

00:50:20.820 The latest one was Dems announced plan to call people racist even harder.

00:50:28.200 That's what they're doing, though, right?

00:50:29.600 I mean, that's just how do you come up with them?

00:50:32.160 How do we come up with them?

00:50:33.240 I mean, look, you know, we're trying to exaggerate the truth to make a point.

00:50:36.680 So we get up in the morning and look at the headlines and look at what's going on in the news.

00:50:39.820 And we think, how can we take this a step further to kind of draw out the absurdity or the hypocrisy that's there?

00:50:48.280 Honestly, it's pretty challenging.

00:50:49.680 And in fact, a lot of people think that this is a lot of low hanging fruit.

00:50:53.380 Like it's a lot easier to do satire in this environment.

00:50:55.360 And I would say it's actually a lot harder because the world has already become like this parody of itself.

00:51:00.300 And so we're kind of parodying a parody, which is, you know, rather challenging.

00:51:04.340 Yeah.

00:51:04.820 Is it I mean, you're basically in the comedy business.

00:51:08.040 So how are you reacting as you see comedy being banned?

00:51:12.860 There's no more comedy.

00:51:13.700 Comedy's done.

00:51:14.600 It's canceled.

00:51:15.440 Dave Chappelle.

00:51:16.200 He's not really canceled, but comedy is kind of canceled left and right.

00:51:19.420 And we've had a bunch of comedians on this show that talk about it.

00:51:22.400 It must be particularly galling to you.

00:51:26.200 It is.

00:51:26.960 Well, I mean, so what what in particular is being canceled is, you know, jokes that are aimed at the wrong target.

00:51:34.560 You know, you're allowed to joke about plenty of things.

00:51:36.280 You're allowed to joke about, for example, a straight white Christian man like me.

00:51:40.820 I'm you know, that's perfectly allowed.

00:51:43.000 What they're trying to outlaw is this this whole notion of like punching down.

00:51:47.600 And it's making jokes of people who are beneath you, essentially, and on this like hierarchical structure of intersectionality and oppression.

00:51:57.600 You know, if you're privileged and powerful and you're joking about somebody who isn't privileged and powerful, that's a no, no.

00:52:03.280 You shouldn't be allowed to do that.

00:52:04.540 You should apologize.

00:52:05.500 You should probably lose your career and your livelihood and be out on the street, you know, begging for food and money.

00:52:12.340 But, you know, we reject that whole thing.

00:52:14.040 I think it's the most silly thing in the world.

00:52:15.440 I'd be interested to hear your take on it.

00:52:16.740 But as far as I'm concerned, when you when you start talking about punching down on people, for example, someone like me, if I was to make fun of women, that would be punching down because women are presumably beneath me.

00:52:25.480 But I don't think of women as being beneath me.

00:52:27.640 So I don't think it's punching down to joke at them.

00:52:29.540 I think we're all created equal and that we should be able to joke about each other indiscriminately.

00:52:33.180 So I reject the whole structure that views things as, you know, I think it only reinforces these ideas that there are some people who are above other people when you start talking about punching down and how that should be off limits.

00:52:42.700 And the other point I'd make there is that this this this whole thing that happened with like Dave Chappelle and and and how everyone was trying to cancel him for the jokes that he was making.

00:52:50.580 You know, these people that claim to be so marginalized and oppressed literally have the power to end the careers of anyone who makes fun of them.

00:52:59.600 So I don't think that they're really marginalized or oppressed when they have that power.

00:53:03.140 If you have the will and the power to punish people who simply make fun of you, then you're actually the oppressor, not the oppressed.

00:53:09.860 So I see it as the other way around.

00:53:11.280 I like that.

00:53:12.100 Well, I agree with you.

00:53:13.060 I don't think I don't in comedy.

00:53:14.660 I don't even know if there should be the rule against punching down.

00:53:16.820 There should be no down, up, left, right.

00:53:18.480 It should just be everyone is fair game.

00:53:20.360 It's it's kind of fun to see yourself made fun of.

00:53:23.240 You know, that's my view of it.

00:53:24.460 It's exciting.

00:53:25.500 Even when you actually go to a comedy club, if you hear your particular ethnic group or socioeconomic class or even yourself made fun of, it's funny.

00:53:34.900 I remember going to this one.

00:53:35.940 And it was a it was a benefit.

00:53:38.500 It was to benefit breast cancer survivors.

00:53:41.220 And our friends were hosting it.

00:53:43.600 We were there.

00:53:44.000 They hired this totally inappropriate in an awesome way comedian.

00:53:47.480 And he got up there and there were there are people of all ages, old, young.

00:53:51.440 He gets up there.

00:53:52.000 And as happens at these things, the older people, like elderly people, were sitting in the front row because they got there early.

00:53:59.480 They want to make sure they had a seat.

00:54:00.840 And the guy stands up by saying, Jesus, it looks like a casket exploded in here.

00:54:05.000 Now, the women who were in the front row with the gray hair were laughing harder than anyone.

00:54:11.100 Good.

00:54:11.360 And my friend who hosted the event comes over and he goes, I thought he was hilarious.

00:54:15.100 And this is a shorter guy.

00:54:16.420 He goes until he started to say I needed human growth hormone.

00:54:20.700 Then he ripped on my husband, Doug.

00:54:22.520 He called Doug a metrosexual and then accused him of having a unibrow.

00:54:26.460 Doug said, that's incongruous.

00:54:27.860 How could I be both a metrosexual and have a unibrow?

00:54:30.280 It doesn't work.

00:54:30.940 And my point is, it's fun to be made fun of.

00:54:33.640 And we used to recognize that universally here in America.

00:54:36.660 Only now, thanks to these uptight wokesters, do we have to word police all the time.

00:54:42.500 It does happen on the other side a little bit, too.

00:54:44.440 I mean, look, I think it's very healthy to look at yourself and examine your own beliefs, your own ideology, your own behavior, and hold it up to mockery and ridicule and see if you pass the test.

00:54:57.020 I mean, it's a fun and healthy exercise.

00:54:59.720 I think when I go to a comedy show and people are joking about things that apply to me, I still laugh.

00:55:05.640 I think it's funny.

00:55:06.840 I think it's and I think the Babylon Bee does a really good job of doing that.

00:55:09.800 We do hit both sides of the aisle quite a bit.

00:55:11.720 You do make fun of people on our side.

00:55:13.520 It's a Christian site run by Christians that makes fun of, you know, little idiosyncrasies and silly things going on in the church and evangelical Christian culture.

00:55:21.300 And, you know, for the most part, the audience is receptive to that and they like to laugh at themselves every now and then, you know, people will bristle and they tend to object to satire and comedy really only when it lands on them.

00:55:34.640 They're fine making fun of everybody else.

00:55:36.640 It's the minute the joke applies to me, then it's really offensive and it's really hurtful.

00:55:40.340 But I think a lot of what you're seeing in our culture today, a ton of what you're seeing in our culture today is not people who are genuinely offended.

00:55:46.800 They're not they're not distraught and upset over the joke that was made at their expense.

00:55:52.980 They're putting that on.

00:55:54.220 It's an act.

00:55:55.020 It's this it's this fake indignation and anger that's meant to really give them the upper hand in a conversation, in a debate about ideas that they want to win.

00:56:04.540 And they don't want to they realize that ridicule and mockery and comedy are effective ways of making ideas look silly and exposing them for what they are.

00:56:14.260 And so when they want to win that that argument, they want to win that debate.

00:56:18.120 They're trying to shut down people who are effectively pushing back on them.

00:56:21.960 And oftentimes that's comedians.

00:56:24.480 I love this quote.

00:56:25.600 It's by G.K. Chesterton.

00:56:26.620 He said humor can get in under the door while seriousness is still fumbling at the handle.

00:56:30.360 And and I think it's really true of comedy.

00:56:32.540 It's extremely effective.

00:56:33.620 And it's one of the reasons that they attack comedians first when they're trying to, you know, be speech police.

00:56:38.840 Yeah, they're so important.

00:56:39.980 They really are sort of the I don't know, canary in the coal mine in some circumstances to show us what the way forward is or the way you're going to get whacked.

00:56:48.120 Exactly.

00:56:48.740 To your point about making fun of anybody and anything, even if it's technically on, quote, your side.

00:56:53.520 One of the most viral Babylon Bee headlines and articles was during 2017 Hurricane Harvey that devastated Houston.

00:57:00.180 And Joel Osteen came under fire for refusing to volunteer his Lakewood megachurch building as safe shelter.

00:57:08.140 All right.

00:57:08.300 This is the headline from you guys.

00:57:09.920 Joel Osteen sails luxury yacht through flooded Houston to pass out copies of Your Best Life Now.

00:57:16.040 And I've got to read part of this article.

00:57:18.980 It's so funny.

00:57:20.600 Go for it.

00:57:21.120 Joel Osteen took flack over the weekend for closing up his church to flood victims and all but disappearing during the aftermath of Hurricane Harvey.

00:57:28.580 The megachurch pastor reportedly returned to the city on his luxury yacht, SS Blessed, to make amends Tuesday by tossing copies of Your Best Life Now to stranded flood survivors.

00:57:40.220 Osteen had his on-call yacht captain steer the large vessel toward the flooded streets of the city, pulling up to survivors stranded on their roofs and on the roof of their cars as the prosperity gospel preacher smiled, waved, and threw out signed editions of the best-selling Positive Thinking book.

00:57:58.680 Believe and declare you are coming into a shift, Osteen yelled through a bullhorn, according to reports.

00:58:04.460 God wants his best for you.

00:58:06.800 Enlarge your vision.

00:58:08.080 Develop a healthy self-image and choose to be happy.

00:58:11.200 Here's the last part.

00:58:12.780 When you think positive, excellent thoughts, you will be propelled toward greatness, he called out to one family floating on a raft on a freeway-turned river whose earthly possessions had been destroyed the previous day.

00:58:26.060 This goes on.

00:58:27.580 Now, see, that perfectly illustrates the point.

00:58:30.440 If I tell you straight-faced on this show, you know, the prosperity gospel doesn't preach to everybody.

00:58:36.260 There's people going through hard times and, you know, to tell them that they're going to experience health and wealth if they just give their life to God when they're actually in real life struggling and when there's something that could be done about it to, you know, if you have wealth and resources to give them and you don't, instead, you just tell them that there must be some sin in their life.

00:58:55.820 Like, that's not that interesting.

00:58:57.540 It's not that compelling.

00:58:58.520 But you put it in humor and you make it a joke and all of a sudden you get the point.

00:59:03.100 Yes.

00:59:03.520 So how – I'm so curious what the process is.

00:59:06.160 Like, I always think about this with the New York Post, too, because they have the best headlines.

00:59:10.720 You know, what is the process?

00:59:11.920 Is it one guy who's just a machine who comes up with the most clever things?

00:59:16.220 Or is it a collaborative effort wherever you sit down, you know, you sit down that morning and you say, this is ripe for, you know, us, grist for the mill, and you all, like, kick around headlines to come up with the funny stuff?

00:59:27.920 It's a mix of the two.

00:59:29.080 I mean, we have some very talented individuals who are extremely productive and can just churn out one idea after another.

00:59:37.180 But we have a whole team of writers who are in a Slack channel communicating with each other throughout the day about what's going on in the news or, you know, in the church or just in the culture in general.

00:59:48.660 And just pitching ideas.

00:59:49.740 It all starts with the headline.

00:59:51.020 The joke is in the headline.

00:59:52.420 So you've got to nail it there.

00:59:53.620 So that's what we start out with is just these endless headline pitches back and forth.

00:59:57.380 And then if we get kind of like a good seed thought there that that looks like it's going to turn into something, we'll iterate on it a little bit to try to get it right.

01:00:04.720 But it's very collaborative.

01:00:06.280 And we work together on it until we really land on some that we know are going to get a good response from our audience once we put it out there and pair it with a funny image or Photoshop.

01:00:14.700 Was it easier during the Trump era or harder?

01:00:20.320 Both.

01:00:22.000 You know, Trump is one of these figures.

01:00:24.080 He's like he's so outlandish.

01:00:26.400 I mean, he's his ego is so big.

01:00:30.120 He said so many things that you just you think you think to yourself, I couldn't have made this up.

01:00:35.240 But this is just unbelievable that you want to hire him.

01:00:38.520 Yeah, exactly.

01:00:39.680 You want to just quote him verbatim.

01:00:41.480 I would say the same for Biden, honestly.

01:00:43.480 You know, there's a lot of things that he says that's that are just, you know, like this gibberish will spill out of his mouth.

01:00:47.980 And corn pop.

01:00:48.380 And, you know, right.

01:00:49.700 These weird things that come out of his mouth that you just couldn't even imagine as a comedy writer, like thinking that up yourself.

01:00:56.440 Well, so in one sense, these are difficult figures to satirize.

01:01:00.560 When people ask me, like the Biden administration, who's who's the easiest low hanging fruit in that administration?

01:01:05.480 It's not Biden.

01:01:06.280 I think Biden is actually difficult to satirize because, you know, he's he's like a parody of a person already.

01:01:11.380 And Trump was the same way.

01:01:12.660 We did have one, though, just this classic one.

01:01:15.200 I don't know if you remember this, but we did a headline on how Trump claimed to have done more for Christianity than Jesus himself.

01:01:21.080 Do you remember that one?

01:01:21.780 No, but it's amazing.

01:01:25.160 Do we use we should do like a true or Babylon B headline?

01:01:28.460 We should do one of those.

01:01:29.860 Right, right.

01:01:30.580 Yeah.

01:01:30.740 Is it the B or is it not the B?

01:01:32.500 Yeah.

01:01:32.680 Yeah.

01:01:32.860 We published this headline back in like twenty nineteen liberals shared it like crazy, thinking it was true.

01:01:37.740 They wanted it to be true.

01:01:38.720 They wanted to believe that Trump had actually said something like that.

01:01:40.900 You fast forward to a month ago and Trump went on a radio show and said he's done more for Christianity and religion in general than any other person in history.

01:01:48.240 So he's like actually fulfilled that joke now as if it were a prophecy and made it come to pass.

01:01:53.920 And that's the reason why people like Trump are difficult to satirize is because, you know, it's hard to go beyond what they're already doing.

01:02:00.160 And then if you do, it ends up coming true like a prophecy.

01:02:02.760 Yes.

01:02:03.240 That reminds me of a very funny situation where I was going on Don I miss one morning.

01:02:07.940 And for some reason, I wonder if my husband my husband was there with me.

01:02:13.260 Don I was a big fan of my husband's books.

01:02:15.400 So I think he was having on my husband.

01:02:17.080 And we went behind O'Reilly, who was on before us.

01:02:21.680 And O'Reilly was promoting killing Jesus at the time.

01:02:24.740 And I remember Doug and I sitting there listening to him.

01:02:26.660 And O'Reilly literally said, you know, we've done a ton of research.

01:02:31.560 There's a lot of new information in there.

01:02:32.960 We did a lot of new interviews with people who, you know, like of the killing of Jesus.

01:02:38.140 Right.

01:02:38.400 Right.

01:02:38.780 How how exactly how we think you can't make it up.

01:02:44.060 Right.

01:02:44.280 And he's got a little touch of Trump in him, too.

01:02:47.440 All right.

01:02:47.660 So now let's talk about this, because that is not the first time that you have predicted

01:02:51.240 something that later came true.

01:02:54.420 I mean, you guys really have lived the life imitates art situation.

01:02:59.520 We pulled a couple of them.

01:03:01.000 All right.

01:03:02.180 Here's the B.

01:03:03.920 And this is May 9th, 2017.

01:03:07.300 Now, people are going to know this one because they lived the follow up three years later

01:03:10.760 in 2020.

01:03:12.200 This is the B in 2017.

01:03:15.440 The headline was two plus two equals four insists closed minded bigot that you were joking.

01:03:23.700 And this is you guys back talking about an alleged teacher and closed minded bigot, Becky

01:03:30.500 Della Torre, reportedly insisting that two plus two equals four, asking her class the

01:03:35.420 question, what does two plus two equal?

01:03:37.380 The intolerant zealot systemically or systematically denied the possibility that the answer could

01:03:42.620 be anything but four going so far as to single out the specific integers three and seven is

01:03:47.040 wrong and mentioned by students as possible answers.

01:03:50.340 Three years later.

01:03:50.920 This is from the Washington Examiner, August 10th, 2020.

01:03:54.300 Math professor claims equation two plus two, quote, reeks of white supremacist patriarchy.

01:04:00.340 It happened.

01:04:01.840 When you see that, are you like, OMG?

01:04:06.260 Well, it's kind of funny and it's also kind of sad.

01:04:09.160 I think simultaneously it's both because, you know, on the one hand, it's like people people

01:04:14.460 will tweet about us like Babylon be for the win.

01:04:16.320 You had another one of these prophecies come true.

01:04:18.060 It's like we don't want them to come true.

01:04:19.420 We don't want to be winning if this stuff is actually happening.

01:04:22.400 It means the country's losing down a really dark path.

01:04:25.780 Right.

01:04:26.520 All right.

01:04:26.880 So here's another one.

01:04:27.600 Babylon be March 25th.

01:04:31.000 Hold on.

01:04:31.740 Let me get it.

01:04:34.740 August 13th, 2020.

01:04:37.540 Your fake headline BLM rioters awarded Nobel Peace Prize.

01:04:42.100 Black Lives Matter, peaceful protesters who burn down communities and violently beat all

01:04:46.360 who stood in their way.

01:04:47.280 Are the recipients of this year's Nobel Peace Prize.

01:04:51.260 Nobody has done more for peace than these brave, peaceful protesters, a Nobel Committee

01:04:55.060 spokesperson said while presenting the award to a young man clad in all black and wielding

01:04:59.200 a bike lock.

01:04:59.740 Well, I mean, look, we were trying to think of what would be the most ridiculous thing

01:05:05.900 that you could say about what's happening right now.

01:05:07.580 And when you've got like, you know, CNN reporters standing in front of burning cars and building

01:05:11.720 saying the situation is mostly peaceful and these riots and looting are described as peaceful

01:05:16.060 protests.

01:05:16.640 You know, it's like the most ridiculous thing would be if they were, in fact, nominated for

01:05:20.720 the Nobel Peace Prize.

01:05:21.560 And it happened a year later.

01:05:25.000 The Guardian had like Black Lives Matter movement nominated for Nobel Peace Prize, January 29th,

01:05:30.220 2021.

01:05:31.360 You can't make it up, right?

01:05:32.280 The guy who submitted them said they have a tremendous achievement in raising global awareness

01:05:36.840 and consciousness about racial injustice.

01:05:39.040 Studies have shown that most of the demonstrations organized by BLM have been peaceful.

01:05:43.500 Of course, there have been incidents, but most of them have been caused by the activities of

01:05:48.940 either the police or counter protesters.

01:05:51.860 I mean, it's like it's almost like you're making it happen.

01:05:54.660 Yes.

01:05:55.260 Yeah.

01:05:55.560 And then it's like they're it's almost like they're copying our own headlines.

01:05:59.360 I mean, we covered when the Abraham Accords were being signed and Trump was there on

01:06:04.060 site during this is the middle of like covid when it first got really crazy.

01:06:07.940 And he's like shaking hands and and meeting with people and he's not wearing a mask and he's

01:06:13.100 not social distancing.

01:06:14.420 We thought to ourselves, how would CNN cover this?

01:06:17.260 They probably talk about how he's like completely ignoring covid protocols, standard covid protocols

01:06:22.700 instead of focusing on the monumental moment at hand of what was actually happening.

01:06:27.840 Sure enough, five hours later, CNN published a headline almost identical to ours, criticizing

01:06:32.460 Trump for not social distancing or wearing a mask at the Abraham Accord.

01:06:36.440 So it's like it's easy to like guess what's going to happen because you can simply think

01:06:41.060 to yourself, what would be the most insane, stupid thing that people could possibly do

01:06:45.340 next and then make a joke about that and then watch it unfold.

01:06:48.860 It's good.

01:06:49.260 It's like it's a bet on human nature.

01:06:50.680 It's smart of you.

01:06:51.300 I'll give you one more before we go to break.

01:06:53.420 Babylon Bee in March, March 25th, 2020, 20, 20 pants sales plummet as everyone working

01:06:59.180 from home.

01:07:00.000 This is your joke.

01:07:00.880 I'm at home all day now.

01:07:01.960 So what do I need pants for?

01:07:03.220 Is it Carl Hampton, a computer programmer expressing a common sentiment?

01:07:06.480 I'm starting to feel dumb that I ever wore pants while shirts are still somewhat popular.

01:07:11.040 Pants have taken a blow.

01:07:12.060 Then you go on.

01:07:13.060 And then two days later, two days later, headline on Yahoo Finance.

01:07:16.780 Here's why Walmart is selling more shirts than pants during the pandemic.

01:07:20.980 And talk about a spike in sales of tops, but not pants.

01:07:25.420 There's like we've got to ask you what your next prediction is so we can know what's going

01:07:28.940 to happen in the next quarter.

01:07:30.020 Maybe it's supply chain related inflation.

01:07:32.040 Is Biden going to get those two spending bills passed and at what number?

01:07:37.080 Anyway, we have more with Seth in a moment.

01:07:38.760 Right after this break, we've got an absolutely insane Microsoft video to bring you that takes

01:07:44.580 announcing your pronouns to a whole new level.

01:07:52.140 I'm going to stand, Seth, by for one second, but I want you to listen to this because I'd love

01:07:56.280 to get your reaction as we bring you a feature we have here on the MK Show called Sound Up.

01:08:01.740 This is where we bring you some sound and now video over on YouTube that we feel you must

01:08:07.160 see or hear.

01:08:09.120 Microsoft has been around for a while, as you know, but as the tech world has gotten increasingly

01:08:14.200 woke, it has evolved as a company.

01:08:16.600 This week, a video surfaced on Twitter that included an introduction to an internal event

01:08:21.820 on security featuring two Microsoft employee hosts.

01:08:28.400 Watch.

01:08:29.080 Hello, everyone.

01:08:29.980 I'm Nathalie Godilla.

01:08:30.960 I'm a Caucasian woman with long blonde hair, and I go by she, her.

01:08:34.900 I'm a product marketing lead here at Microsoft and co-host of the podcast Security Unlocked

01:08:39.460 with this guy.

01:08:40.360 Yes, that would be me.

01:08:41.340 Hello, everyone.

01:08:41.840 I'm Nick Fillingham.

01:08:42.760 I'm a Caucasian man with glasses and a beard.

01:08:44.760 I go by he, him, and I'm a security evangelist here at Microsoft.

01:08:48.220 OMG.

01:08:49.540 So name pronouns, of course, and then skin color, hair color.

01:08:55.180 Why?

01:08:57.720 Apparently, this is this part of the introduction was done for employees and viewers who are

01:09:02.780 visually impaired.

01:09:03.780 You got to get everybody now.

01:09:05.740 Every introduction.

01:09:07.180 OK.

01:09:07.740 Long blonde hair.

01:09:08.920 Glasses and a beard.

01:09:09.820 Sure.

01:09:10.140 OK.

01:09:10.740 Why do the blind people listening need to know that you're white exactly?

01:09:14.320 How is how is this progress?

01:09:15.860 This video, however, was nothing compared to the way two more Microsoft hosts kicked off

01:09:21.340 the company's Ignite 2021 stream this week, but this one went way beyond just describing

01:09:27.920 the host's skin color.

01:09:29.740 Listen.

01:09:31.620 Hello and welcome to Microsoft Ignite.

01:09:35.460 We've got a big day ahead and lots in store for you.

01:09:39.780 First, we want to acknowledge that the land where the Microsoft campus is situated was

01:09:45.460 traditionally occupied by the Sammamish, the Duwamish, the Snoqualmie, the Suquamish,

01:09:52.360 the Muckleshoot, the Snohomish, the Tulalip, and other Coast Salish peoples since time immemorial.

01:10:01.360 A people that are still here, continuing to honor and bring to light their ancient heritage.

01:10:07.660 My name is Allison Wines.

01:10:09.900 I'm a senior program manager in our developer tools division.

01:10:12.920 I'm an Asian and white female with dark brown hair wearing a red sleeveless top.

01:10:18.660 And I'm Seth Juarez, program manager in the AI Platform Group.

01:10:22.000 I'm a tall Hispanic male wearing a blue shirt, khaki pants.

01:10:26.820 It's amazing.

01:10:29.480 Wait a minute.

01:10:30.480 Where are your pronouns, Allison and Seth, you bigots?

01:10:32.860 Honestly, like, can you believe these people are running companies?

01:10:39.540 Apparently, Microsoft, while raking in its billions, did not feel compelled to, I don't know, move

01:10:45.020 the campus away from the land occupied by all those Native American tribes there for time

01:10:50.040 immemorial or pay any sort of restitution over their crimes.

01:10:53.800 No, just a little mention by Allison.

01:10:56.180 That'll do it.

01:10:56.960 And then on to the race-focused intros, and then tech lingo, and we're off to Ignite.

01:11:02.300 And we feel so much better about ourselves as good people.

01:11:06.480 And this has been the latest edition of Sound Up.

01:11:11.240 Seth, you can't make it up.

01:11:13.200 What about the poor Sammamish and the Muckleshoots?

01:11:15.840 What are we supposed to do about them?

01:11:18.220 I love that you're laughing because the appropriate response to this stuff is laughter.

01:11:22.120 It's ridicule, right?

01:11:23.220 Ridicule this nonsense.

01:11:24.780 Mock it because it really is silly.

01:11:26.140 I felt like I was watching a skit, like an SNL skit the whole time I was watching those

01:11:30.460 clips.

01:11:30.920 It's just like, it's unbelievable that people are saying this with a straight face, describing

01:11:34.980 their physical appearance.

01:11:35.800 But the silly thing is, with wokeness, whiteness is like the pinnacle of evil.

01:11:41.440 Whiteness is, if you're white, you're evil incarnate.

01:11:43.560 So to announce that you're white, that's basically a confession.

01:11:46.400 I can't believe they didn't apologize on the heels of that.

01:11:48.760 Yeah.

01:11:49.000 Oh, exactly right.

01:11:49.860 It's so, I mean, as I was saying, like, is that progress?

01:11:52.200 I'm white.

01:11:52.760 I have to tell everybody.

01:11:53.540 The blind people must know my skin color because that's going to put me, of course, into, you

01:11:57.680 know, a certain category.

01:11:58.680 And in your case, white male, you know, patriarchal, whatever.

01:12:01.680 They've got to make all the assumptions that, you know, we're now trying to put back into

01:12:05.020 the American psyche when it comes to skin color.

01:12:07.020 It's so backward.

01:12:09.420 Yeah.

01:12:10.140 Yeah.

01:12:10.540 It's very backward.

01:12:11.340 It's, it's, it's literally reinforcing all of these ideas that, that really it's, it's

01:12:16.600 making skin color and gender and sex, the most important thing about you.

01:12:20.340 And when you're talking about like a business thing, this is where it gets weird in business.

01:12:23.860 It's like the people that you're hearing from, you want to know what their credentials

01:12:26.460 are, right?

01:12:27.000 You want to know that they're qualified to talk to you about what they're talking to you

01:12:29.660 about.

01:12:30.000 It doesn't really matter how long their hair is or what color their skin is or what gender

01:12:34.060 they are.

01:12:34.520 As long as they're like, is the right person for the job.

01:12:37.540 And they're the person that should be speaking to you about this particular product or service.

01:12:41.360 Here's my question.

01:12:42.140 Steve Krakauer, our executive producer.

01:12:43.700 Are we sure this is real?

01:12:44.620 Are we sure this is not an attempt at being the Babylon Bee?

01:12:48.020 Good question.

01:12:48.700 Right?

01:12:49.000 That this is all just like a setup to it's, you're sure he's saying it's real.

01:12:54.340 I know, but I feel like maybe it's just bait.

01:12:56.420 He says, we pulled the video from their website.

01:12:58.260 Maybe it's just bait to see if we'll take it.

01:13:00.280 I mean, the problem is it's hard to know because it seems totally realistic in today's

01:13:04.100 day and age that they'd be doing this.

01:13:05.140 And he is assuring me in my ear, it is real.

01:13:06.820 Can we see it again?

01:13:07.860 I need to see Muckleshoot one more time.

01:13:09.420 Watch.

01:13:10.840 Hello and welcome to Microsoft Ignite.

01:13:15.120 We've got a big day ahead and lots in store for you.

01:13:19.400 First, we want to acknowledge that the land where the Microsoft campus is situated was

01:13:25.120 traditionally occupied by the Sammamish, the Duwamish, the Snoqualmie, the Suquamish, the

01:13:32.660 Muckleshoot, the Snohomish, the Tulalip, and other Coast Salish peoples since time immemorial.

01:13:40.980 A people that are still here, continuing to honor and bring to light their ancient heritage.

01:13:46.740 My name is Alison Duwamish, Snohomish.

01:13:51.060 I mean, Seth, if SNL doesn't touch that, they must go away.

01:13:55.960 They must implode and never be watched again.

01:13:58.900 Okay.

01:13:59.240 But I'm going to push back on that because how do they touch that?

01:14:01.780 How do they make it funnier than it already is?

01:14:03.640 Tell me how they do it.

01:14:04.320 How do they stretch it?

01:14:06.020 There's got to be a way.

01:14:07.740 The Snow Homish.

01:14:09.320 I mean, you've got to make it like, I don't know, quintuple syllabic, right?

01:14:14.000 Like, there's got to be a way of making it even more outrageous.

01:14:17.580 And for the people who are listening, go.

01:14:20.200 Well, you can watch this on YouTube, on our YouTube channel later.

01:14:23.780 Isn't this what's silly about virtue signaling, though?

01:14:25.860 Like, what are they actually doing about it?

01:14:28.060 I don't know.

01:14:28.800 It's basically just start all those native tribes, bye, and here's all our millions.

01:14:32.460 Look at me in my cute sweater.

01:14:34.200 The thing is, if you watch it on video, she does like the dramatic side turn, you know,

01:14:42.980 like, hi, I'm Allison.

01:14:44.420 And now an apology to this Snow Amish and Samimish and Muckleshoot.

01:14:51.640 As if anybody has ever said to themselves, God, the Muckleshoots are going to be pissed.

01:14:57.460 What the?

01:15:00.080 They feel good, though.

01:15:02.180 They feel very good about themselves.

01:15:03.600 And this brings me to your new book.

01:15:07.260 Okay, the book is called, this is actually a great idea for the holidays, I have to say.

01:15:11.620 Nobody's paying me to say that.

01:15:12.760 I just genuinely think this is a brilliant gift.

01:15:15.300 The Babylon Bee Guide to Wokeness.

01:15:17.820 How to take your wokeness to the next level by canceling friends, breaking windows, and burning it all to the ground.

01:15:24.360 So it's just published this week.

01:15:27.560 And it walks you through what it's like, what it really means to be woke.

01:15:33.420 And it starts with the following introduction.

01:15:35.520 Being woke means realizing the problems in your life are not your fault.

01:15:40.200 Nothing is your fault.

01:15:41.600 Finding the racism, sexism, and hatred in everything.

01:15:45.340 Changing your profile picture to match the current fad.

01:15:47.620 Brainwashing your kids to hate life and be miserable.

01:15:51.160 Rioting in the name of justice.

01:15:52.760 And becoming an absolute horrible person to be around.

01:15:55.260 Well, that's what it is.

01:15:59.160 It's a how-to guide on how to accomplish all of those things.

01:16:02.280 And it starts by, you may think to yourself, Megan, I'm not a racist.

01:16:06.380 I don't harbor hate in my heart.

01:16:08.240 I'm not, you know, I like, I love other people regardless of their skin color.

01:16:12.160 I have friends who are darker skinned than I am.

01:16:15.540 That is exactly what a racist would think and say.

01:16:18.400 And you have to realize that first and come to grips with your own racism and your blindness to it before you can become truly woke.

01:16:25.260 So that's what this book is.

01:16:26.920 It's a guide.

01:16:27.700 It's a detailed guide with lots of little, like, charts and graphs.

01:16:30.400 And it's pretty funny.

01:16:32.160 And I think you're right.

01:16:33.340 It is the perfect holiday gift.

01:16:35.320 We've got some of that.

01:16:36.180 Let me show the full screen of the two brains.

01:16:37.900 This is from the book.

01:16:39.820 The full screen for the listeners shows your regular brain on the left.

01:16:44.400 And it looks like a sort of a, it's not filled in.

01:16:47.280 It's like white.

01:16:48.420 And the one on the right is yellow.

01:16:49.820 So you can see it's stuff's going on.

01:16:51.680 But the regular brain has got a part that controls hunger, cognitive planning, imagination, joy, wonder.

01:16:58.740 The woke brain, which is all colored in sort of peachy orange, offended, offended, offended, offended, offended at every part of the brain at all times.

01:17:09.700 And the book does make the point about, you know, tackling, tackling racism, which is a serious thing.

01:17:16.040 And the warning signs of it.

01:17:17.680 Racist.

01:17:18.460 These are the signs that you might be one.

01:17:20.320 Being white.

01:17:21.560 Capitalism.

01:17:22.100 Band-Aids.

01:17:22.860 Dr. Seuss books.

01:17:24.160 Math.

01:17:24.960 Asking someone where they're from.

01:17:26.460 Meritocracy.

01:17:27.400 Being colorblind.

01:17:28.440 Disagreeing with Marxism.

01:17:29.720 Taco Tuesday.

01:17:30.800 Having a black friend.

01:17:32.240 Drinking milk.

01:17:33.140 Not racist.

01:17:34.340 Judging someone by the color of their skin.

01:17:36.440 Oh, this is so brilliant.

01:17:38.040 That's the only thing that's not racist is basing everything on skin color, right?

01:17:41.940 Everything else is racist, including two plus two equals four.

01:17:45.300 That's the backwards, upside down world that we're in.

01:17:47.940 So, yeah, the book is trying to highlight all of that, draw that to the surface and confront it with a laugh, which I think it deserves.

01:17:54.340 Yes.

01:17:54.560 And really, really effectively know the signs of secret racism as well.

01:17:59.940 One, you breathe in oxygen and breathe out carbon dioxide.

01:18:04.940 You, two, you have feet.

01:18:06.740 Three, you say, I'm not a racist.

01:18:10.300 Four, you judge people not by the color of their skin, by the content of their character.

01:18:13.380 Five, you like vanilla ice cream.

01:18:14.800 Six, you've mispronounced someone's name before, especially a person of color.

01:18:18.160 Seven, you believe two plus two equals four.

01:18:19.940 Eight, you smile pleasantly and say hello to people of color.

01:18:22.640 Nine, you don't capitalize bold and underline the word black.

01:18:25.760 Ten, you exist.

01:18:29.640 This is straight out of Robin DiAngelo's white fragility.

01:18:32.280 This is basically her whole theme.

01:18:34.660 Right.

01:18:34.860 Basically, yeah.

01:18:36.040 I mean, those are all the things that you actually do get.

01:18:38.200 Well, the feet thing is a little ridiculous.

01:18:40.040 I think the joke, the little caption underneath it is, well, you know, KKK members and Nazis had feet and you do too.

01:18:45.260 So there is a correlation there.

01:18:47.780 That's silly.

01:18:48.720 But the other stuff, I mean, these are real things that you're actually accused.

01:18:51.520 If you say, if you're polite to minorities, then you're like going out of your way to try to make them feel comfortable.

01:18:57.380 And that's condescending.

01:18:58.380 And that makes them actually more uncomfortable.

01:19:00.200 And that's racist.

01:19:01.200 This kind of stuff is everywhere.

01:19:02.700 It's toxic.

01:19:03.820 It's insane.

01:19:04.820 It is it is racism.

01:19:07.000 You know, you have like this Virginia election that just happened.

01:19:10.100 The women that came out in droves to vote in that election for a Republican were accused of white supremacy because because they simply didn't vote the way that they were supposed to vote.

01:19:22.180 So there's a certain way you have to vote in order to be woke, too.

01:19:25.120 And so our book helps you with that.

01:19:26.800 You have to get used to being called those crazy terms if you're going to talk about the news in any sort of an open way or just life in any sort of an open way, because they will call you that.

01:19:35.780 You talk about how to spot oppressed women, long, pretty hair, making a sandwich, smells like essential oil surrounded by cute little adoring kids.

01:19:44.720 How to spot liberated women, womb slowly turning into vacant husk.

01:19:52.180 So short hair, bags under eyes from working 80 hour a week, Tinder dating app on phone, birth control and purse surrounded by cats.

01:20:02.280 Say purple hair, purple hair should be on there somewhere.

01:20:04.700 Purple hair must be on there.

01:20:05.980 I'm sure I've got short.

01:20:07.540 I'm not sure I have the entire list, but it's brilliant.

01:20:10.280 And then you've got to take some fun poking at poking fun at climate change.

01:20:15.640 This is this is how you're doing it wrong.

01:20:17.860 If you care about the environment.

01:20:19.200 Here's a graphic from the back of the book.

01:20:20.780 Earth rape, it says how it works.

01:20:24.480 Warning, disturbing.

01:20:26.260 The first picture is of a woman standing there and it reads inhale attacker attacker pre medicate meditates crime.

01:20:35.700 He, she will perpetrate on victim prepares for assault.

01:20:38.640 Middle picture rest attacker charges up CO CO2 blast from inside the black,

01:20:46.180 the black, empty void that once held a soul.

01:20:50.200 And the last one is exhale.

01:20:52.340 Earth is raped.

01:20:53.740 So there's nothing sacred to you.

01:20:57.660 You'll take aim at any one thing.

01:20:59.600 Does this does this result in any actual blowback in your business model or your personal life?

01:21:06.020 Well, I mean, the business model is under threat from stuff like we were talking about earlier with like the New York Times maligning us or misrepresenting us or like the fact checking resulting in our content not getting, you know, as much reach as it used to get on the social networks.

01:21:23.220 But, you know, these are the kinds of jokes that we've always made.

01:21:27.380 And it's not really like any one particular joke gets people really mad and they can like cancel us.

01:21:32.340 There is no real direct way to cancel us because we're not like we're not like on some network somewhere where we could be taken off the network.

01:21:38.840 You know, we don't have bosses who could fire us.

01:21:40.640 We, you know, we're not going to cancel ourselves and go away.

01:21:44.180 So ultimately, you know, there's these roundabout ways that they try to come after us by saying that we're hate speech under the guise of satire or misinformation under the guise of satire.

01:21:53.860 And those are the ways that they're trying to come after us.

01:21:55.880 So there have been like real world actual effects of that.

01:21:58.640 But honestly, a lot of the things that they're trying to do to silence our voice amplify it.

01:22:03.680 We end up doing more media appearances and talking about this stuff more.

01:22:06.700 There's a lot of backfiring that happens whenever they're trying to get somebody to shut up.

01:22:09.800 And it happens in the elections, too.

01:22:11.440 I mean, look, when when the left vilifies white people and calls white people evil, you're basically the devil incarnate.

01:22:17.880 You're you're literally Hitler, you know, like you're you're so evil just because you're white.

01:22:21.880 And then you decide to vote for somebody else who doesn't talk about you that way.

01:22:25.460 They act like that somehow justifies their treatment of you.

01:22:28.900 And they double down all their racist for not voting the way they wanted you to vote in the first place.

01:22:32.840 It's so true.

01:22:34.060 That is so true.

01:22:35.080 So but wait, so has Facebook been messing with you and, you know,

01:22:38.440 the algorithm and sort of the hits on the B?

01:22:41.380 Oh, yeah.

01:22:41.940 Yeah.

01:22:42.300 Drastically.

01:22:42.820 Our reach on Facebook is like 30 percent, 20 percent of what it was a year or two ago when our when we had a much smaller, smaller audience than we have now.

01:22:52.360 So our audience has grown.

01:22:53.380 Our reach has declined.

01:22:54.460 I joked recently on Tucker about how like we had one article that that got viewed by like 11 people when we posted on Facebook and we could have reached more people if we printed it out and like nailed it to a telephone pole in a small town.

01:23:04.720 It's like they are throttling how much our trap our articles get shown.

01:23:09.440 And I think it's because we're fact checked so much and they've given us a news quality score and it's like a low score.

01:23:15.660 They're scoring us as like an unreliable news source.

01:23:18.780 And the whole point is not a news source at all.

01:23:21.160 We make jokes.

01:23:22.440 So jokes don't have a truth rating.

01:23:24.420 We're living in this weird era where jokes are now true or false.

01:23:28.180 They're not funny or not funny.

01:23:29.740 They're either, you know, offensive and hurtful hate speech or they're, you know, acceptable forms of, you know, conforming ideologically correct, politically correct speech.

01:23:39.300 So, you know, it's a weird time to be doing comedy, that's for sure.

01:23:42.540 But there are certainly some of those effects going on.

01:23:45.200 It's so maddening, right?

01:23:46.220 It's like you've got to please the bosses at Facebook in order to get the traffic that you're entitled to, you know, that you otherwise would have if they just didn't interfere.

01:23:53.420 But, yeah, and I'm sure if your jokes were going the other way, if they were at the expense of Trump or Trump voters, you wouldn't be having this sort of suppression.

01:24:02.240 I don't know how exactly it works.

01:24:04.300 I just know that they're a lot more careful about checking people like John Stossel, people like even me, but certainly the Ben Shapiros of the world and the Babylon bees, because you're out there very openly not saying the things they want.

01:24:19.000 Well, I'll give you one example of one that was like so silly that it got fact-checked.

01:24:25.040 If you've seen like a list of our fact-checked articles, it's really, really funny.

01:24:28.780 It's funnier than the articles themselves.

01:24:30.420 But we did one about how the Ninth Circuit Court had overruled the death of Ruth Bader Ginsburg, overruled her death.

01:24:37.240 And it's just this silly thing.

01:24:39.140 It's like the washing machine joke we did back in 2018 about how CNN had purchased an industrial-sized washing machine to spin the news in before publishing it.

01:24:45.860 Like, it's one of those just outlandish, silly stories.

01:24:49.060 Like, that's not really possible.

01:24:50.300 It couldn't be true.

01:24:50.800 That is not a thing.

01:24:50.960 Why are you going to fact-check that?

01:24:53.120 What was that?

01:24:53.920 But the Ninth Circuit cannot overrule a death.

01:24:57.340 That is not a thing.

01:24:58.180 And yet that was fact-checked by USA Today.

01:25:02.040 Yeah.

01:25:03.020 Yeah, USA Today fact-checked that.

01:25:04.560 And Facebook paid for it.

01:25:05.740 If you scroll down to the bottom of it, it says Facebook paid for parts of our fact-checking department are like funded by grants from Facebook or something like that.

01:25:14.040 So Facebook is out there paying fact-checkers to rate jokes false, so then Facebook can then go to those comedians who told those jokes and say, stop sharing this false information or we're going to take you off the platform.

01:25:25.660 That is so crazy.

01:25:26.940 Another one, Reuters fact-checked the article by the Bee saying, Nancy Pelosi thanked babies for sacrificing their lives for women's rights.

01:25:36.080 I mean, all I could think was how stupid are people.

01:25:41.220 People are so stupid, right, that they, A, believed this, and that, B, that Reuters would then take the time, Reuters, to actually figure out, you know, how you got it wrong, how Nancy Pelosi never said that.

01:25:53.160 Sometimes it's the people's fault.

01:25:56.080 I think a lot of times it's not because, like we've discussed, I mean, the world is so crazy.

01:26:00.760 You have, like, you have Laurel Hubbard being named Sportswoman of the Year, and you have, what's her name?

01:26:07.600 I'm forgetting the lieutenant governor's name that was just elected in Virginia.

01:26:10.760 Winsome Sears.

01:26:11.380 Winsome Sears.

01:26:12.520 Yeah.

01:26:13.120 Winsome Sears is called a white supremacist.

01:26:15.540 Right.

01:26:15.700 So, you know, men or women, black people or white supremacists, you can't make this stuff up.

01:26:21.400 The world is too absurd to be satirized.

01:26:23.400 And so I give people a pass when they believe these jokes are real, because in a current climate that we're in, you watch real headlines, and they're just as unbelievable as the satire.

01:26:32.500 Yeah.

01:26:32.960 I mean, I'll tell you one group that would not have been fooled, and that's the Duomish.

01:26:36.780 They would have been honest, given their lifetime experience, the Snohomish, the Muckleshoots, they would have been all over this.

01:26:44.900 And it's good that we're bringing them back and apologizing for the many offenses that we've caused.

01:26:51.240 Seth, what a pleasure.

01:26:52.360 Keep on going.

01:26:53.540 We all love it.

01:26:55.040 You've brought me so many laughs over the years, you have no idea.

01:26:58.020 And just promise me you'll keep it going.

01:26:59.600 Don't sell it.

01:27:00.160 Don't close it.

01:27:01.840 I won't.

01:27:02.320 I won't.

01:27:02.680 And here's the book.

01:27:03.380 If you want to go buy it, The Babylon Bee Guide to Wokeness, please go check it out.

01:27:06.740 It's pretty fun.

01:27:08.080 It's a lot of fun.

01:27:08.540 A hundred percent.

01:27:09.260 And that genuinely will make a great, great Christmas gift or a holiday present.

01:27:12.900 So do it.

01:27:14.080 And everybody who gets it will be in on the joke.

01:27:16.920 I want to take this opportunity to tell you about, as a programming note, on Monday we have

01:27:22.220 an exclusive interview with Dustin Heiss.

01:27:25.400 Do you know that name?

01:27:26.820 He is suing Don Lemon, accusing him of alleged sexual assault.

01:27:31.540 This will be his first interview.

01:27:32.920 And we are going to get into the case that everyone in the media is ignoring.

01:27:38.640 Why?

01:27:38.900 Because Don Lemon, the man who lectures us all on morality, is untouchable?

01:27:43.760 No, he's not.

01:27:45.020 So we will have that interview for you right here on Monday, live.

01:27:48.880 Don't miss it.

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01:27:51.240 YouTube.com slash Megyn Kelly and download all the shows.

01:27:54.760 Have a great weekend.

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01:27:58.820 No BS, no agenda, and no fear.

01:28:02.920 Thanks for listening to The Megyn Kelly.

The Megyn Kelly Show - November 05, 2021

Policing Comedy and the Kaepernick Documentary, with Jason Whitlock and Seth Dillon ｜ Ep. 197

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